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#i miss it. ugh anyway
cozybells · 2 months
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Take care.
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yaekiss · 1 month
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since your normal requests are still open (^ω^) i absolutely NEED to go next door to my darling kaeya!!! he can’t just be so devoted and adoringly obsessive without being rewarded! after that little show of a picture he sent, can’t quite be satisfied until i ravage him the way we know he wants </3
𝑹𝒆𝒄𝒊𝒑𝒓𝒐𝒄𝒂𝒕𝒆𝒅
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꩜ Room Content: Dom! GN! Reader x Yan! Sub! Kaeya, no gendered terms for reader, Kaeya calls you "my heart", unhealthy and obsessive relationship from Kaeya, unhealthy attachment from reader, stalking (from Kaeya), mentions of biting and marking (Kaeya receiving), handjob (Kaeya receiving), lmk if I missed out anything ! ꩜ A/N: This is a (long overdue) sequel to this love letter from a previous event (now closed!) Sigh I really meant to finish this a lot earlier, first it was supposed to be your birthday present then when that date passed by, a v-day gift of sorts,,,,, But it's here now!! Hope it's kind of what you were looking to read @pulpbeing !
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The whole walk over to the next room, regardless of how short it was, you were barely cognizant. It was hard to be, when mere minutes ago, it was revealed to you that your lover was some sort of obsessive stalker. (Yet, why does your heart still hammer so hard in your chest?)
Each step draws you closer and closer to Kaeya, and before you even register it, you’ve reached the door to his room. It's the very last one in the hallway. The room opposite his is vacant.
Your blood thrums under the skin of your fingers as you reach out to the smooth cold handle on the door, as if the mere act of crossing that threshold could shatter everything at once.
And to your surprise, the door swings open without any resistance.
The second your foot pads onto the carpet of his room and the door locks behind you, the atmosphere turns electric as a singular starry eye bores into you from where Kaeya is lounging on the bed.
And there he is. Draped in the same lacy white lingerie in the scandalous photograph he sent to you. As if the sight in the picture wasn’t stunning enough already, the sight of your lover before you outright steals the breath from your lungs. 
Adorned in naught by the gauzy fabric, you drag your gaze down from his face, to the crimson-stained trail left from that trickle of wine from his lips. The sheerness of the lingerie leaves nothing to the imagination with the way it snugly hugs his figure. The curve of his chest, his slender yet toned physique, stark white garter belt against the flesh of his thighs.
It's all ridiculously tantalising to you. And he knows it.
“No need to just stand by my door, my heart. You can do more than just gawk at me, you know?” Kaeya all but purrs out to you from where he’s seated, his one eye squinting as he grins.
Somehow, your body has already betrayed your warring thoughts within because when you next blink, you’ve crossed over to the bed, the mattress dipping as you take your seat beside him. His grin grows more blinding at this and he squeezes in closer to you, until your thighs are touching. 
“So the cat’s out of the bag, and now you know I’ve been tailing after you in Fontaine like some lovesick dog off a leash,” he sighs noncommittally, as if he didn’t just admit to stalking you.
He fixes you with a gaze, “How exactly does it make you feel?”
“Is it fear?”
The silence grows when you don’t respond, as if you know in a deep twisted part of your mind, that despite this, Kaeya would never harm a single hair on your head.
“Or is it desire?”
And it’s at this, that your heart thumps. 
The kiss is messy, more tongue and spit than anything else but you can’t be bothered when you’re busy removing the lingerie still on him. He melts into you as your hands wind around his frame, unravelling and undressing him from the flimsy layers of white lace that dare to separate him from you. When you watch the pure white tumble from him, perhaps he’s not the only one whose desires drive them wild.
A breathy moan leaves him as you leave bite mark after bite mark across the expanse of his neck. The feeling of your teeth pressed against his skin, the pressure and force behind it threatening to break past the surface. You’re kind enough to grant him one last hickey prior to pulling back and briefly admiring your handiwork.
Hands trailing down his side, you graze your fingertips over his hips before you settle a palm against his length. Just before he can roll himself up to rut against your hand, your other hand grips the side of his hip, stilling him as a protesting noise slips past his lips.
“You’ll move when I say you can. You can do that for me, yes?” 
Docile, he nods and simply watches on as your hand wraps itself around him. You can tell by the way he’s fisting the bedsheets that he’s holding himself back, resisting the urge to fuck into your hand. Aided by the precum drooling from his tip, you glide your hand slowly up and down, marvelling at the way his breath hitches and eyes screw shut whenever you twist your grip exactly where you know he likes it.
It doesn’t take long before you can tell he’s reaching his limit. His breathing grows clipped and ragged and his groans and whines become increasingly needy. Every time his hips jerk involuntarily, your hand stills, prompting him to plead pitifully for you to continue. He makes quite the sorry sight before you, and your heart twinges with the need to watch him come undone.
Deciding you’ve toyed with him enough for now, you lean in, whispering, “Go on, let me see how you reward yourself.”
His pulse jackrabbits as you lave your tongue along his jugular, panting out broken “thank you”s at your generosity while he frantically chases his release, rutting into your hand. A quick twist and he’s spilling over, crumpling in on himself as he moans unabashedly at the pleasure you’ve shown to him. He has his chin hooking over your shoulder and arms wrapping around you, pulling you into a tight hug whilst riding out his high, his chest heaving as he catches his breath.
Suddenly, your world tilts when Kaeya pulls you down onto the bed, you lie atop him, trapped in his embrace.
And coy as he is, he slithers next to your ear and whispers breathlessly, “It’s alright, you can have your way with me,” you can feel his heart pound from beneath you, your pulse matching his.
“There’s no one next door anyways.”
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Thanks for reading! Consider supporting me on kofi if you enjoyed this or check out my other works hehe ♡
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fauxyz · 9 months
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every time andrew and neil touch, in order
i wanted to make this list for a while to help me with fic writing, and then once i did, i figured i should share it in case anyone else found it interesting!
for each touch, i've included the book and chapter, a little bit of context, and the quote describing the touch. (a note because this is so long: when the quotes/scenes are long, i cut some pieces out to focus on just the moments where they touch, so these are not always complete quotes.)
first touch moment is below, and the rest are under a cut because this list got LONG. enjoy! :)
--
1. the foxhole court, chapter 2, when leaving wymack's office to head to the foxhole court for the first time:
"I don't need to be persuasive," Andrew said, putting a hand to Neil's chest as the elevator slowed to a stop. "You'll just learn to do what I say." The doors slid open behind Neil. As soon as they'd parted enough Andrew gave Neil a small push. Neil tripped backward into the lobby. Andrew shoved past him, bumping him from shoulder to hip, and headed for the door.
2. the foxhole court, chapter 3, when andrew sneaks up on neil while neil is looking at the single-stall showers in the locker room:
Lashing out was instinctive, but Andrew caught the elbow Neil would have slammed into his ribs. Andrew laughed and retreated a couple steps.
3. the foxhole court, chapter 7, before leaving for eden's twilight, when andrew sees neil without his contacts:
Neil couldn't leave with Andrew in the way, so he stopped as close to Andrew as he dared and waited for Andrew to move. Andrew did, but only to reach out for Neil with one hand. Neil tensed as Andrew's fingers wrapped around the back of his neck, but Andrew only wanted to pull Neil's head down. Neil focused on Andrew's cheekbone so as not to go cross-eyed and let Andrew study his eyes.
4. the foxhole court, chapter 7, on the way to columbia, when aaron wakes andrew in the backseat:
Andrew's elbow slammed into his diaphragm hard enough to double Neil up over his knees. Aaron, completely unsympathetic, snapped his fingers over Neil's head at Andrew. "Exit," he said. Andrew braced himself on Neil's back and leveraged himself between the front seats.
5. the foxhole court, chapter 7, when neil realizes his drinks were drugged:
Neil lurched to his feet, but Andrew grabbed him by his hair and slammed him back into his seat. A cruel twist pulled his head back at a dangerous angle, and Andrew slammed Neil's hand flat against the tabletop. Neil lifted his other hand to pry Andrew's fingers off, but Nicky caught his wrist. [...] Neil wrenched his hand out from under Andrew's, but Andrew gave his head a warning yank. A bolt of heat went down Neil's neck. Neil hissed in pain and went still. Andrew slid out of his chair and leaned against Neil, letting Neil take his weight while he checked Neil's eyes.
6. the foxhole court, chapter 7, when neil is wandering through the crowd at eden's twilight:
A hand came up against the small of his back and shoved. The push got him free of the crowd and sent him crashing into the back wall.
7. the foxhole court, chapter 8, when neil told andrew the first bit of truth about being nothing and wanting what kevin has:
Andrew reached up and forcibly uncurled Neil's fingers from his mouth. He pushed Neil's hand out of the way and stared Neil down with nothing between them.
8. the foxhole court, chapter 13, after neil protected kevin from riko on kathy's show:
"It's fine, Coach," Andrew said, catching up to them. He touched Neil's back on his way by, fingers light enough to give Neil goose bumps, but didn't slow on his way to Kevin's side.
9. the foxhole court, chapter 13, when talking to andrew after andrew punched the window in his down, and when neil wanted to run after realizing riko was coming after him:
Neil turned away, but Andrew was faster. He rocked forward and grabbed Neil's collar, dragging him to a halt before he could leave. He left sticky blood on the back of Neil's neck from his messy fingers. Neil reached back and tried to pry him off, but Andrew refused to let go.
10. the foxhole court, chapter 14, when neil decided not to run and to come with andrew to eden's instead:
He pressed two fingers to Neil's throat, checking his pulse. When Neil tried to bat him away, Andrew caught his wrist with his free hand. His smile was small and fierce as he leaned forward into Neil's space. "Remember this feeling. This is the moment you stop being the rabbit." Neil was too startled to answer, but Andrew didn't wait. He slid past Neil, using the weight of his body and his grip on Neil's wrist to pull Neil with him out of the way of the door. He let go in the middle of the hallway and slipped his hands in his pockets to wait.
11. the foxhole court, chapter 14, at eden's twilight that night:
A group of people shouldered their way up to the bar counter at Neil's back, pushing him into Andrew. Andrew didn't budge beneath his weight. He was something solid to lean against, something violent and fierce and unmoving.
12. the foxhole court, chapter 14, after finding out about seth's death, when neil asks andrew if he drinks so he doesn't have to feel anything for a while:
Andrew turned to face him. Neil wasn't expecting it and almost ran into him. Andrew dug his fingertip into the hollow of Neil's throat in warning.
13. the foxhole court, chapter 14, when neil says he won't bargain with the foxes' lives against riko, and andrew says he'll handle it:
Neil said nothing. Andrew hooked his fingers in the collar of Neil's shirt and tugged just enough for Neil to feel it. [...] Andrew didn't let go until Neil nodded, and then he reached for Neil's hand. He took his cigarette back, put it between his lips, and pressed a warm key into Neil's empty palm.
14. the raven king, chapter 5, when andrew calls neil's phone and convinces him to keep it:
"I don't care if you use this phone tomorrow. I don't care if you never use it again. But you are going to keep it on you because one day you might need it." Andrew put a finger to the underside of Neil's chin and forced Neil's head up until they were looking at each other.
15. the raven king, chapter 9, when neil asks if the other foxes can come with them on halloween and andrew tells neil to ask matt what happened the previous year:
When Neil started to argue, Andrew hooked a finger under his chin and forced his mouth closed again with an easy jerk of his hand.
16. the raven king, chapter 10, when neil asks andrew to come with nicky to see his parents, and andrew tells neil about cass:
Andrew rocked onto the balls of his feet and reached for Neil. It was all Neil could do to not tense up when Andrew's hands wrapped around his neck. Andrew didn't hold tight enough to cut off his air but tapped his thumbs against Neil's throat in time to Neil's pulse. [...] Andrew tapped his fingers a little faster, an agitated rhythm completely at odds with the mocking smile on his lips. [...] Finally Andrew reached for him again. This time he hooked his fingers in Neil's shirt collar instead of going for his throat.
17. the raven king, chapter 11, when andrew takes off his wristbands and neil sees his scars for the first time:
Neil grabbed hold of Andrew's wrist. He started to turn Andrew's arm over, sure he'd imagined things, but Andrew clamped his free hand down on Neil's forearm. [...] The iron in his grip was at complete odds with the drugged smile on his face. Andrew wasn't bluffing. If Neil didn't let go fast enough Andrew would break his arm. Neil loosened his grip but spread his fingers as he did so. He felt the slight dip and bump of destroyed skin beneath his fingertips and felt his stomach drop. Andrew wrenched Neil's hand off his arm, but he did it in a way that kept his bared forearm turned toward himself.
18. the raven king, chapter 12, when neil and andrew speak on the porch of nicky's house, and neil tries to get an emotional response from him:
Andrew laughed and pulled a hand free of his pocket. He wrapped his fingers around Neil's throat, not tight enough to cut off Neil's air but snug enough to be a warning. [...] Neil reached up and took hold of Andrew's wrist. He couldn't feel the scars through the cotton sleeve but he didn't need to. He knew they were there. [...] Andrew's fingers slowly tightened until Neil couldn't breathe anymore. He refused to shake Andrew off. The tightness in his chest started as simple discomfort but spread until it felt like every bone in his chest would break beneath the pressure. Neil's control started to crumble, no matter how fiercely he clung to it, and he'd just shifted to throw Andrew back when Andrew finally loosened his grip. Instead of letting go, Andrew slid his hand around back of Neil's neck and pulled him in close. He put his mouth at Neil's ear and lowered his voice, but Neil didn't have to see his face to know Andrew was still smiling.
19. the raven king, chapter 13, when neil says he'll watch kevin while andrew is in the hospital:
Andrew took a couple quick steps his direction and shoved Neil as hard as he could. Neil knew it was coming and tried to brace for it, but he still stumbled back a couple steps. [...] When Andrew pushed him again Neil caught hold of his arms and pulled Andrew with him. [...] He laughed, curled his fingers tight around Neil's chin.
20. the raven king, chapter 13, when neil lets andrew feel his scars as part of his truth on credit to earn andrew's trust:
Neil waited, but Andrew didn't let go. With so many people watching them Neil couldn't lift his shirt. He did the next best thing and dragged one of Andrew's hands under the hem. He pressed Andrew's palm to the ugly scarring across his abdomen. Andrew's eyes dropped to Neil's shirt like he could see Neil's marred skin through the dark cotton. [...] Andrew's fingers twitched against Neil's skin.
21. the king's men, chapter 1, when they get back to psu after picking andrew up from easthaven:
Neil was the first out and he caught Andrew's door before Andrew could close it. Andrew didn't move, but there was just enough room for Neil to lean in and get his binder. He straightened and turned to find Andrew had shifted closer. There was nowhere for Neil to stand except up against Andrew, but somehow Neil didn't mind.
22. the king's men, chapter 1, when neil gave his armbands back:
His gaze dropped immediately to the dark cloth in Neil's outstretched hand and he took them without a word.
23. the king's men, chapter 1, when andrew found out neil went to the ravens over the winter break and realized about the tattoo:
He scratched up a corner of the tape and ripped the bandage off like he wanted to take Neil's face with it.
24. the king's men, chapter 1, when neil said he went to the ravens to protect andrew:
Andrew clapped a hand over his mouth, smothering the rest of his words, and Neil knew he'd failed.
25. the king's men, chapter 2, when andrew goes to get neil from the library:
Fingers digging into the back of his skull startled him awake. He grabbed for a gun, for a knife, for anything close enough to buy him room to flee, and sent the computer mouse skidding across the table. Neil stared blankly at it, then at the screen in front of him. Fingers clenched into a fist in his hair and Neil didn't resist as Andrew forcibly tilted his head back.
26. the king's men, chapter 2, when neil got between matt and andrew when andrew went after matt for hitting kevin:
He used his body and momentum to shove Andrew back. He expected Andrew to hold his ground, but Andrew let himself get pushed and flicked Neil an unconcerned look.
27. the king's men, chapter 2, when neil protested that he could still walk when wymack says he doesn't want neil to move too much because of his injuries:
Andrew dug a fingernail into the hollow of Neil's throat until he had Neil's undivided attention. "Sit down and be still." Neil batted Andrew's hand away and turned back to the couch.
28. the king's men, chapter 2, when neil protested that wymack was benching him because of his injuries:
Neil forgot the rest of his argument when Andrew pinched his wrist. A bolt of fire popped through his fingers and he snatched his hand away as fast as he could.
29. the king's men, chapter 3, when andrew sees neil's scars for the first time (lots of touches here):
He got his shirt over his head and to his elbows before Andrew got tired of watching him struggle and tugged the shirt loose. [...] Andrew reached for the bandages on Neil's wrists, and Neil let him rip tape and gauze off. [...] On Neil's right shoulder was a burn scar, courtesy of getting smacked by a hot iron. Andrew put his left hand to it, fingertips lining up perfectly with the raised bumps the iron's holes had left behind. His right thumb found the puckered flesh from a bullet. [...] "This," Andrew dug his fingers harder into the iron mark, "is not from a life on the run." [...] Andrew was quiet a long time, then dropped his hand to the slashes across Neil's gut.
30. the king's men, chapter 9, when they talk on the roof and andrew gives neil a key to his new car:
Andrew dug a finger in Neil's cheek and forcibly turned his head away. "Don't look at me like that. I am not your answer, and you sure as fuck aren't mine."
31. the king's men, chapter 9, when andrew kisses him for the first time:
With that, Andrew caught Neil's face in his hands and leaned in. [...] Andrew kissed him like this was a fight with their lives on the line, like his world stopped and started with Neil's mouth. Neil's heart stuttered to a stop at the first hard press of lips against his and he reached up without thinking. His hand made it as far as Andrew's jaw before he remembered Andrew didn't like to be touched. Neil caught hold of Andrew's coat sleeve instead and knotted his fingers in the heavy wool. The touch was a trigger. Andrew leaned back just enough to say, "Tell me no."
32. the king's men, chapter 9, when neil doesn't say no to the kiss:
He practically shoved Neil's arm away from him and leaned back out of Neil's space.
33. the king's men, chapter 10, when they kiss back in the dorm (cut some of the end of this scene for length):
Neil took the pint from Andrew's unresisting fingers, stacked it on top of his, and leaned in. He stopped shy of actually kissing Andrew, not daring to touch him until Andrew gave him a green light. Andrew's expression didn't change but there was a subtle shift in his body's tension that told Neil he'd gotten Andrew's attention. Neil lifted a hand but stopped it a safe difference from Andrew's face. Andrew caught hold of his wrist and squeezed in warning. [...] For a second Neil thought Andrew would push him away and be done with this. Andrew did push, but he followed Neil down. The short carpet was rough against Neil's knuckles where Andrew pinned his hand over his head. Neil couldn't complain when Andrew was an unyielding weight on top of him. He started to reach for Andrew again but stopped himself halfway there. Andrew snagged that hand too and held it down out of the way. "Stay," Andrew said, and leaned down to kiss him.
34. the king's men, chapter 10, when neil asks andrew to let something in after the foxes win and move onto round three of finals:
Andrew pushed Neil out of the way and slid off the car.
35. the king's men, chapter 11, when neil and andrew are alone in the dorm again, after andrew talks about how he hasn't figured out which neil is the lesser of two evils:
His fingers were cold from the can when he curled them around Neil's chin. [...] Andrew waited until he'd gone still before kissing him. [...] He was cotton-headed and unsteady by the time Andrew pressed his other hand flat against Neil's abdomen. Every nerve ending from his chest down seemed to twitch in response. Neil clenched his hands into fists like that would keep them where they were and let Andrew back him into the wall.
36. the king's men, chapter 11, after neil's phone goes off with his countdown text while they're kissing:
Neil kissed his neck, hoping to distract him, and was rewarded with a startled jolt. That was enough reason to do it again. Andrew pushed his face away, but they were standing too close together for Neil to miss the way he shivered. Andrew kissed him before Neil could say anything about it. Andrew pushed him harder into the wall, mapping him out through his shirt from shoulders to waist and back again. He'd had his hands on Neil's bare skin just a couple weeks ago when he saw Neil's scars, but this felt completely different. This was Andrew learning every inch and edge of him. His hands had never felt this heavy or hot before. Every press and demanding slide of his fingers sent heat curling through Neil's veins.
37. the king's men, chapter 11, when andrew moves neil's hands to touch him while they're kissing:
He hadn't said that aloud, but as if on cue Andrew followed Neil's arms down to his wrists and poked his fingers into Neil's pockets. He was making sure Neil's hands were still there, Neil guessed, so Neil twisted his hands deeper in response. Andrew caught hold of his wrists and squeezed to stop him. After a moment's consideration he pulled Neil's hands free and held them up by his head. He kissed Neil like he wanted to bruise his lips and leaned back to fix Neil with an intense stare. "Just here." "Okay," Neil said, and dug his fingers into Andrew's hair as soon as Andrew's grip went slack. [...] All that mattered now was how easy it was to pull Andrew in for another kiss. Andrew slowly let go of his wrists and placed a hand flat on Neil's chest. They stood like that an age, Andrew testing Neil's control and Neil content to kiss their mouths numb.
38. the king's men, chapter 11, andrew getting neil off for the first time (some of this quote is cut because this scene was too long):
Andrew's hand between his legs was an unexpected weight. Neil didn't realize how tight he twisted his fingers in Andrew's hair until Andrew bit his lower lip in warning. Neil grumbled something incoherent and forcibly loosened his death grip. He thought he tasted blood, but it was a fleeting tang quickly forgotten as Andrew got his button and zipper undone. Andrew wasn't gentle, but Neil didn't want him to be. [...] They stood cheek-to-cheek a minute, an hour, a day, Neil's heart pounding in his temples and overloaded nerves shuddering. Coherent thought came back in lazy, fractured pieces and the first thing Neil was really aware of was how tight Andrew's fingers were digging into his chest. Neil tried to look down, but Andrew gave him a short shove in response. [...] Neil flexed his fingers in Andrew's hair, fixing his grip so he could tug Andrew into a short kiss. Andrew tolerated it for only a moment before leaning back. He wiped his hand on Neil's shirt before tugging at Neil's wrists. Neil obediently let go of him and didn't miss the way Andrew watched him lower his hands.
39. the king's men, chapter 11, when they start kissing more often:
Andrew pinned him against chilly concrete and worked hot hands under his shirt.
40. the king's men, chapter 11, when they're chatting on the roof and neil takes andrew's cigarette:
Andrew pinched his wrist and took the stick back.
41. the king's men, chapter 11, after neil shuts andrew up by saying he is nothing and andrew wants nothing:
"Stop talking," Andrew said, and kissed him.
42. the king's men, chapter 12, on the bus alone before the game on his last countdown day when neil says he still doesn't swing because all he wants is andrew:
He buried his hands in Andrew's hair and tugged him in for a kiss. It was easy to forget this endless ride and tonight's game with Andrew's hand on his thigh and teeth on his lip.
43. the king's men, chapter 14, in the hotel meeting for the first time after neil was taken:
The weight of a hand on the back of his neck said he'd bought Andrew enough time to reach him. Nathaniel didn't remember closing his eyes, but he forced them open again. He tried straightening, but Andrew caught his shoulder and shoved him to his knees.
44. the king's men, chapter 14, andrew kneeling in front of neil to look at him in the hotel:
Andrew's expression was deceptively calm, but there was iron in his grip when he seized Nathaniel's chin.
45. the king's men, chapter 14, andrew looking over neil's injuries:
Andrew let go of him so he could tug Nathaniel's hood out of the way. He dragged a finger along the lines of tape keeping the myriad of bandages in place as if looking for the best place to start. He tore the gauze off Nathaniel's right cheek first, exposing the striped lines left by Lola's knife. He favored the stitches with a cursory glance before moving on. The tape on Nathaniel's other cheek hurt like hell coming off, since it pulled the skin around his burns, and Andrew froze with his hand a few scant inches from Nathaniel's face.
46. the king's men, chapter 14, andrew looking at the burns and injuries on neil's face:
Andrew pressed two fingers to the underside of Nathaniel's chin to turn his head. Nathaniel let himself be guided and said nothing while Andrew looked his fill. When Andrew dropped his hand and clenched it in Nathaniel's hoodie, Nathaniel risked looking back at him. There was violence in Andrew's eyes, but at least he hadn't shoved Nathaniel away yet.
47. the king's men, chapter 14, when neil tells andrew why he didn't say anything about his father's men to protect the foxes and that he didn't know they'd already planned a riot:
Nathaniel still had his hands up by Andrew's face, so he lightly tapped a thumb against the bruise at Andrew's eye.
48. the king's men, chapter 14, when abby tries to approach when she sees neil's face:
He caught hold of Nathaniel to turn his face forward again and shot Abby a look so vicious she stopped in her tracks.
49. the king's men, chapter 14, when neil tries to get andrew to focus on him and not abby:
Nathaniel gave Andrew's hair a cautious tug. Andrew resisted the first two attempts but finally let Nathaniel drag his attention back where it needed to be.
50. the king's men, chapter 14, when abby backs off:
He didn't hear her step back but he knew she did by the way Andrew's death grip on his skull relaxed. Nathaniel kept one hand buried in Andrew's hair but finally lowered the other.
51. the king's men, chapter 14, when neil tells andrew what happened to his father:
He crossed a precarious line and pressed two fingers to Andrew's chest over his heart.
52. the king's men, chapter 14, when neil says he'll leave if andrew doesn't want him:
Andrew hooked his fingers in the collar of Nathaniel's sweatshirt and tugged just enough for him to feel it.
53. the king's men, chapter 14, when browning keeps interrupting their time with neil:
Andrew tugged Nathaniel's hoodie and said in German, "Get rid of them before I kill them."
54. the king's men, chapter 14, on the car ride back from the interrogation:
Neil sat in the backseat with Andrew and toyed with the bandages on his face. Andrew popped the back of his head when he realized what Neil was doing and ignored Neil's scowl.
55. the king's men, chapter 14, when neil starts panicking when he sees his injuries when abby changes his bandages:
Neil didn't know what sound he made but Andrew's fingers were a sudden and unforgiving weight on the back of his neck. Andrew pushed him forward and held him down. Neil tried to breathe but his chest was as tight as a rubber band ready to snap.
56. the king's men, chapter 14, after andrew gets neil to calm down:
He went limp and let Andrew pull him back upright.
57. the king's men, chapter 15, when andrew is trying to get neil ready for a shower while matt is still in the room:
Andrew waited until he was seated before lifting the bottom edge of Neil's hoodie. He raised it an inch or two, then checked another spot, and finally poked his hand up under the edge.
58. the king's men, chapter 15, when neil struggles getting undressed for a shower:
Andrew gave him only a second before peeling the sleeves off his arms one at a time.
59. the king's men, chapter 15, andrew putting the bags over his bandages and injuries:
Andrew pulled a garbage bag over each arm, tore the excess edges off, and taped the jagged ends to Neil's biceps. He tugged at both bags to check for any give and added another layer of tape to be sure. When Neil's arms were good, Andrew started on his face. He picked up one of the plastic ends he'd torn off, folded it over and over in on itself, and taped it over one of Neil's cheeks like a shiny black bandage. Neil was pretty sure Andrew put more tape than plastic on Neil's face, but Neil wasn't going to complain. Andrew finished his other cheek and inspected his handiwork. Neil guessed he was satisfied with the end result because Andrew tossed the scissors and roll of tape off to one side.
60. the king's men, chapter 15, when neil tries to secure the blanket around his shoulders but can't because of the bags on his hands: 
Andrew watched him try twice, then pushed his hands aside and did it for him.
61. the king's men, chapter 15, when getting into the shower:
Andrew studied his chest with a bored look, but the fingers he pressed to Neil's scars were a heavy and lingering weight.
62. the king's men, chapter 15, in the bathroom before the shower:
Neil leaned in to kiss him, needing to know if Andrew would lean away or push him back. Instead Andrew opened his mouth to Neil without hesitation and slid his hand up Neil's chest to his throat. Kissing hurt his injured cheeks but Neil fought to ignore that twinging pain. It'd only been a couple days since those kisses on the bus but right now it felt like forever.
63. the king's men, chapter 15, after kissing, before showering:
"You are a mess," Andrew said against Neil's lips.
64. the king's men, chapter 15, getting in the shower:
Neil stepped on the hems of his pants to get them started in coming off, but Andrew did most of the work stripping him. It was awkward being naked in front of someone else, his scars and bruises on full display, but the uncomfortable curl in Neil's gut was eased somewhat by the detached way Andrew handled him.
65. the king's men, chapter 15, hair washing: 
A hand in his hair jarred him from his thoughts and he cracked his eyes open to see Andrew standing in front of him. Andrew hadn't bothered to get undressed aside from stripping his bands and shoes off. Water plastered his black shirt to him, and small streams raced down his temples and over his cheeks to drip off his chin. Neil reached for his face, remembered the bags just in time, and frowned a bit in annoyance. Andrew pushed his hand aside and yanked the shower curtain closed.
66. the king's men, chapter 15, not washing anymore (ended this quote early but we all know what happens next): 
Andrew got Neil's hair washed efficiently, if not gently, but by the time he moved on to Neil's body there was more kissing than cleaning. Andrew made the mistake of turning his face away at one point, so Neil chased water down the side of Andrew's neck. Andrew's fingers clenched convulsively on Neil's sides as a shudder wracked Andrew's frame. [...]
67. the king's men, chapter 15, after the shower: 
Andrew scrubbed him dry, careful around his injuries and too-vigorous everywhere else, and peeled the dripping bags from Neil's arms and face. Andrew ran a considering finger along the bandages on Neil's left arm before helping Neil into the loosest clothes he owned.
68. the king's men, chapter 15, first night on vacation with the foxes:
Andrew wasn't far behind him, and together they got Neil changed out for bed. [...] Despite his reservations, there was something painfully familiar about the weight of another body in his bed. Less familiar was the way it felt being pushed deeper into the mattress, Andrew's hands on his shoulders and tongue in his mouth, but that was something Neil could definitely get used to. [...] He buried his unease and confusion deep and worked bandaged fingers into Andrew's hair. He didn't care how much it hurt so long as he could pull Andrew's elbow. Andrew wrenched out of his grip but stopped moving.
69. the king's men, chapter 15 (the second one), after andrew confronts katelyn in the library:
Neil let him get to the railing overlooking the campus pond before catching hold of Andrew's elbow. Andrew wrenched out of his grip but stopped moving.
70. the king's men, chapter 15 (the second one), after asking how andrew can stand to be with neil after everything he'd been through:
Then Andrew was back, as calm and uncaring as always, and he caught Neil's wrist to push his hand to his side. He dug his fingers in before letting go, not quite hard enough to hurt, and said, "That's why."
71. the king's men, chapter 15 (the second one), when they're alone after winning a game and the rest of the team celebrated:
Andrew was ready when Neil turned back to him, and he caught Neil's collar to pull him down. Neil planted one hand against the rough carpet to keep himself leveraged off Andrew's body. The other he buried in the beanbag near Andrew's head. Andrew dragged a hand down Neil's arm from his shoulder to his wrist.
72. the king's men, chapter 15 (the second one), when neil told andrew he's not a pipe-dream:
Neil ignored that dismissal because Andrew was already pulling him down again. They kissed until Neil felt dizzy, until he wasn't sure he could hold himself up anymore, and then Andrew pulled Neil's hand off the beanbag chair. He held it up away from them for an eternity, then slowly pressed it flat against his chest and let go. Andrew tensed up underneath Neil's hand but relaxed before Neil could pull away.
73. the king's men, chapter 16, at eden's twilight:
The club was too loud for Neil to hear Andrew's approach, but suddenly Andrew was pressed into his side by the crowd.
74. the king's men, epilogue, when neil realizes he has everything he wants:
Now he couldn't help but smile and pull Andrew in.
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rjshope · 1 day
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my favorite smile🤍
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possiblycringe · 6 months
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Everybody wants to see you fall in love!
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joejoeba · 5 months
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i just remembered how many gold ships there are in JoJo like it truly does not get more wild. Every one hits in some wild offshoot bullseye
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xenocorner · 1 year
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Small sketch page of some of my marvel blorbos ;; Couldn't fit all of them in it nor had the time but hey I got the itch scratched kinda
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1driedpersimmon · 1 year
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Happy birthday L death note and also Happy Halloween!!!
Edit: everyone who guessed Patrick Bateman and Columbo you're right! 😘 blows kiss at u
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even-disco-baby · 1 year
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LILIENNE, THE NET-PICKER — “You’re pretty good with that boy, Cuno.” She says it thoughtfully, as though she’s turning this fact over in her mind as she works at the tangled net in her lap. The sea is a soft roar over the horizon, and the world is tinged a dusky blue.
“Really? It doesn’t feel like I am. He still calls me anything but my name. Usually a slur.”
“It’s tough love, Lilienne, that’s all. A kid like that needs discipline.”
“He’s not that hard to deal with. He just wants somebody to play along with him. That’s all any kid wants.”
“He was good to me first.”
LILIENNE, THE NET-PICKER — She arches an eyebrow. “Really now…”
DRAMA — She isn’t doubtful, sire. Just surprised.
LILIENNE, THE NET-PICKER — “Well, I hope you’ll keep on being good to each other, then. The kid certainly needs it.”
EMPATHY — And so do you, she thinks.
LILIENNE, THE NET-PICKER — “You seem good with the young people around here in general,” she muses. “Cuno, those kids at the church, Lily and the boys… You said you used to be a teacher, didn’t you? Maybe that’s why.”
PAIN THRESHOLD — A familiar ache squeezes your lungs. The same ache that drove you to become a teacher in the first place. An incalculable and long forgotten loss.
INLAND EMPIRE — Don’t follow this thread any further. Let it unravel.
“Yeah, that’s probably it.”
“No, there’s something else… Lost children, a lost Indotribe…” [Follow the thread.]
“I think I wanted to be a father, once.” [Change the subject.]
LILIENNE, THE NET-PICKER — She pauses her work, strands of the net wrapped loosely around her fingers, but does not look up. “…Oh?”
ELECTROCHEMISTRY — Hey, it’s never too late! Now’s your chance to give fatherhood a shot!
“Any chance *we* could make it happen?” [Give her the finger guns.]
“I wonder why I did…”
“It was a stupid thing to want.”
“I still do.”
“I guess it never worked out.”
LILIENNE, THE NET-PICKER — “Hm…” She goes back to her work, slowly and carefully. “Why not?”
“I don’t know. Can’t remember.”
“In *this* economy?”
“Things never lined up right, I guess.”
“I bet it was *her* fault. She ruined my chances forever.”
“Too poor and drunk and sad.”
“I’d never want to inflict myself on a child.”
“Just look at me.”
LILIENNE, THE NET-PICKER — She does look at you. There is no pity or disgust or whatever other terrible thing you expected in her gaze. Just a quiet acknowledgment.
EMPATHY — To her, you look just like a father she once knew. This only makes her more inclined to agree with you.
LILIENNE, THE NET-PICKER — “…When I first got pregnant with the boys,” she says quietly, returning to her work, “I was uneasy. Wondered if it was… right to bring them into this world. Into *our* arms…”
PAIN THRESHOLD — A rare pang wracks her. She does not like to think about these things.
LILIENNE, THE NET-PICKER — “I never did decide one way or another. I just knew what I wanted, and so I went ahead with it. *We* went ahead with it. And then again with Lily, even though…”
EMPATHY — Even though at heart she knew, by then, how it would all end.
SHIVERS — Five years ago, a man stands on the boardwalk where the corpse of a different drunken husband will one day be discovered. Bottle still clutched tightly in his hand, he fights the urge to throw himself into the dark water. He wins the battle today, but he will ultimately lose the war.
LILIENNE, THE NET-PICKER — “However things turned out for you, I’m sure you had your reasons.” She sighs, and cuts a strand of the net with the tip of her knife, then ties it back together. “Though that probably sounds shallow, coming from me.”
“A little, yeah.”
“Not at all.”
“Can I ask you something?”
LILIENNE, THE NET-PICKER — “Go ahead.”
“Do you regret having kids?”
“Uh… never mind.”
LILIENNE, THE NET-PICKER — She smiles, and there’s an uncharacteristic sadness in the lines around her eyes.
“No,” she says softly. “Never once.”
EMPATHY — She wonders if this is proof of her own selfishness.
It isn’t the children she regrets. It’s the world that she brought them into.
LILIENNE, THE NET-PICKER — “Now that they’re here, all we can do is love them. And you’ve got plenty of love in you for the children, it seems. That’s more than a lot of fathers could say…” She sighs, her eyes shadowed and sunken. “Oh, I don’t know what I’m trying to say anymore.”
DRAMA — But you know what *you* would like to say, sire. Go ahead. Now’s your moment!
REACTION SPEED — No, it really isn’t. Please don’t push your luck.
“Lilienne…”
Don’t push your luck.
LILIENNE, THE NET-PICKER — She turns to you, expression inscrutable with the light of the setting sun behind her. “Yes?”
“Do you think *we* could ever… try again?”
“Do you think you could ever see *me* as… a father?”
“Do you think there’s any hope in this world for any of us?”
“Do you think the children will ever forgive us?”
“Do you think I’m… a good man?”
LILIENNE, THE NET-PICKER — She looks at you, her chin no longer held high, a tired slump in her shoulders and something searching in her eye. Her hands are all tangled in webs of fragile knots.
“I think…” she says slowly, evenly, “you’re looking for something that I can’t give you.”
-1 MORALE
“Okay. Well. Khm. Right.”
“What the hell does *that* mean?”
“That’s not really what I asked…”
Say nothing.
LILIENNE, THE NET-PICKER — “I know what you’re asking,” Lilienne says frankly. “I’m just not so sure that *you* do…”
EMPATHY — For love.
RHETORIC — For vindication.
INLAND EMPIRE — For a lifeline.
VOLITION — For a future.
LILIENNE, THE NET-PICKER — Lilienne sighs, watching the twins in the distance, starting the long march home from the beach before dark. “At some point, Harry, you’re going to have to be okay with your life.”
SHIVERS — You have twenty two years left to reach that point.
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vampirejuno · 13 days
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Fucked up having a goofy ass romantic nature when you're not in a relationship or even have a crush on anyone specific. You'll be sitting there thinking "oooh I wish I had someone to kiss and take on gayass dates and dedicate my soul to" with complete sincerity like some kinda 18th century nerd who courts ladies just so he can have someone to write poems for. I have all this love in me and nowhere to put it, what a fuckin waste dude. You were right Freddie find me somebody to love
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theonewhowails · 5 months
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in my head this is how Divine Inspiration works
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compacflt · 1 year
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some more attempts at the top gun class of 86
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bbonbonss · 10 days
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my little wrath hybrid, fig
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Banter
Notes I Pure fluff maybe + chung myung content ?!?! woah.. keep in mind that this is not edited and checked :3
Chung Myung will never let you live this down. No way. Especially when he, quite literally, had you pinned down. "Give up yet?" He asks, his tone teasing as he looks down at you with that shit-eating grin he knows you have a hate-love relationship with. God, you want to wipe that grin off his face so bad. "Love," You start, your tone seemingly pleading as you look up at him. The one and only Mount Hua's Divine Dragon, Chung Myung, swore he could explode at any given moment. And while that normally is a threat to the other disciples, it means something else now. Slowly but surely, you lean closer to him. You then pout, "Please.." A kiss, then you turn the tables on him. For a split second, he was caught off-guard with that kiss; you didn't waste any time switching your positions. How cute he looks when he's under you. "I'll kiss you, okay? So please, keep your voice down."
Notes II Chung Myung deserves all of the kisses and hugs in the world.
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itspileofgoodthings · 26 days
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so many people have said that as you approach your 30’s things start to fall into place but I don’t feel that at all. the closer I get the more it feels that everything is dissolving and falling apart
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puppyeared · 6 months
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if escape rooms as team building exercises became popular im not sure if id be more excited or terrified
#if it isnt already anyway.. i can see it happening as a school frosh thing. idk if it would catch on as a workplace thing#i kind of find the concept of being locked in with strangers and working to find a way out weirdly exhilarating though#at least compared to icebreakers cause i dont have to spend 10 minutes racking my brain for something to blurt out abt myself#as a bonus u could like. put people into groups and give prizes to whoever escapes first second third etc. apparently they also do themed#escape rooms.. maybe let people pick a theme? or voluntary sign up? actually this would be really fun for smth like a blind friend date#although if i found out i was locked in a room with an online friend id be too excited to actually escape LOL#ive never done an escape room before so sadly i cant speak from experience. its like up there on things i want to try next to rug tufting#workshop and visiting new art exhibits or conventions. i seriously need to get out more if it wasnt for the horrors <- school and anxiety#i was planning to invite cass to a drop-in art workshop in town but neither of us could go bc typography is making us go thru hell and back#AND THEY HAD A BUTTON MACHINE TOO#im nostalgic bc i miss working in groups and not being awkward abt it or worrying abt schedule conflicts#i realized that i learn best in groups and its a little corny but i like sharing ideas and talking through a problem#in elementary i could just sit down with friends for review and come out of it energized *and* more familiar with the material#and i could technically still do it now. but as adults we're more picky abt who we work with on top of being way more busy outside school#maybe im lonely. im shy and grew up not talking to ppl unless i absolutely have to so its hard to make friends on my own i guess#only thing getting me thru it is telling myself that humans like helping and that my cringe is overblown in my head. but its hard#hence the escape rooms. i have been able to talk to 2(!!) people though!! mostly abt school stuff but im glad to be on friendly terms#i dont really know how to be happy these days cause im constantly scaring myself abt my portfolio and finding places to work#not being ambitious is part of not wanting to put energy into something that wont work out while also not having the passion to do literall#anything else.. i should probably talk to my counsellor ugh#yapping
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