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justniaaa · 4 years

Text

Unravel Me (4)

Gif by: @blackisblackisblack

Rating 18+NSFW

Work Count: 3.4k

Pairing: Christopher “Rio” Martinez xblack!oc

Warning: Swearing, mentions of a gun

A/N: Hey my loves! I’ve missed you guys so much, so sorry for the late update. I’m not going to lie and say it wont happen again because it most likely will but I wasn’t expecting to be gone for so long. Anxiety/ Depression is a fucking bitch bro and like I said before even if my posting isn’t constant, I always want to make sure to give you guys content. Thanks for you for rocking with me and Enjoy chapter 4! Happy reading and please dont forget to like, comment and reblog <3

Summary: Toni forms an unsuspecting friendship with Christopher that turns into something more. As her feelings towards him continue to grow she starts to unravel the secrets that surround him and in return, he unravels her completely.

Chapter 4: Let the games begin

After the eventful night between Toni and Chris, it was like the days went by rather quickly and before she knew it, Friday was here and Toni’s nerves were coming along for the ride. When she came home that night and told her girls about what transpired with her and the mysterious business mogul they gave out beaming smiles and all three of them jumped around, excited that Toni was going out on a date. And of course, don’t even get her started on Aaliyah, the woman was more than elated, and every chance she got she made sure to bother Toni about her new “boyfriend.”

Toni was walking in from work at Print Monthly and let out a yawn. Working two jobs, and writing a new article was slowly catching up with her, but with enough caffeine, she thinks she could make it through. She took off her heels and placed her keys on the entrance table trying to stifle yet another yawn, that was on its way out of her mouth. As she went further into the apartment she didn’t hear any movement from either of the girl’s rooms so she figured she was home alone. Toni went into her room not caring to turn on the light since she had a small night light in the corner and shut the door. She dropped her purse on the floor and took off her clothes, only leaving on her bra and panties. Toni sighed and shuffled to her bed, face planting into it as she wrapped her sherpa throw around her body. Since the AC was fixed the day before her place was nice and cool and all she wanted to do was take a small nap.

But before she could float away to unconsciousness her door was rushed open and the light flicked on, “Oh no bitch, get up!”

Toni groaned hearing Rocky’s voice and covered her face with the blanket, wishing for a couple of minutes of sleep, “Antonia Kelis Thompson, up now!”

The blanket was ripped away from Toni, and she put her face into the pillow, “Just five minutes,” she groaned.

“No, get up! Sage made you a smoothie to help with your energy before she left for the grocery store and you need to drink it so we can get you together for tonight.”

Toni turned her head and looked at Rocky, she was standing next to her bed with her eyebrow raised and a hand on her hip and the other was outstretched with said green smoothie in her grasp.

“It’s only six Rocky, we meet up at nine.”

True to his word, Chris hit her up and they set up a time and place to meet up, the place being an escape room to which Toni was particularly thrilled about. She had always wanted to go to one and she vaguely remembered mentioning it to him on one of their morning talks at the cafe. After they arranged their night out they continued texting each other throughout the day and it felt good to have that feeling of giddiness whenever she heard her phone ding and it possibly being him.

Toni huffed and sat up, sitting cross-legged on her bed and took the drink from Rocky’s hand. Taking a few sips she scrunched up her face from the taste but soldiered on when she saw the look Racquel gave her. When she finally finished the last bits of the smoothie, she put the glass on her nightstand and turned back to her friend.

“All finished, what’s next on the list warden?”

Racquel rolled her eyes, “So damn dramatic, go take a shower and I’ll dive into that mess you call a closet to find you something to wear.”

Toni stretched her limbs as she stood up from the bed while Rocky shooed her to the bathroom grabbing her towel from the back of the door in the process.

“And don’t forget to shave bitch!” Rocky yelled out.

“I shaved my legs yesterday, why the hell am I going to do them again?” Toni said poking her head out from the doorway, her confusion was evident.

“I’m not talking about your legs, girl,” Raquel said, winking. Toni didn’t plan on sleeping with Chris tonight but with how crazy the attraction was between them anything was possible. So with understanding and gratitude, Toni simply nodded and backed into the bathroom, closing the door and getting to work.

After the long half-hour of exfoliation, shaving, and showering, Toni came out of the bathroom feeling fresh and squeaky clean and walked into the sight of her bed strewn with clothes. She took in the sight of her best friends arguing with a piece of clothing in their hands about which outfit would work best. She chose to ignore them knowing that whatever they picked would be applicable and tightened the towel on her form, going to her vanity to do her makeup and hair. The girls interrupted her a few times showing her what they chose and Sage helped Toni curl her hair in the back. Music and bouts of laughter were heard throughout the home and the minutes ticked by getting closer to when Toni was deemed to leave. She was just putting on her light blue jeans when her phone went off, interrupting the song that was playing on her Bluetooth. Rocky and Sage continued talking about whether she should wear heels or sneakers, and Toni finished buttoning her pants walking over to her device. The name Chris was on her screen, and before the voicemail picked up she answered.

“Hello,” she said.

“There she is, thought you weren’t gonna answer,” Chris’s smooth voice came through the phone, making Toni’s stomach flutter with butterflies. She could vaguely hear noises of machinery in the background but she didn’t think anything of it because as quickly as the noise came it was gone, like he went into a separate room.

“I mean I didn’t have to pick up, especially since you're interrupting me getting ready for my date,” Toni sat down on the bench at the end of her bed.

“Oh, word? Who’s the lucky man?”

Toni looked down at her nails, “Some guy I met a couple of weeks ago, he ain’t all that but I decided to have mercy and give him a chance.”

Chris laughed into the receiver, “I bet he’s hype as fuck to take your pretty ass out.”

Toni shrugged like he could see her, “I mean, I am kind of great.”

“That you are Antonia, that you are.”

Toni covered her mouth with her fingers, trying to control the megawatt smile that was threatening to break out. They knew each other barely a month and already the way Chris made Toni feel was slightly alarming. “Is everything okay though, because if you need to change the time or something that’s fine.”

“Nah we good, just wanted to check up on you. And make sure I wasn’t gonna do an escape room by myself.”

“No worries, I’ll be there,” Toni said grinning.

“Aiight, so I’ll see you soon yeah?”

“Yes, sir nine o’clock.”

Chris chuckled, “Aight mama, later.”

Toni hung up and put her phone back on the charger, “I’m guessing from all the flirting we just heard, that was him,” Sage asked.

She shook her head, “Yeah, he was calling to make sure we were still on tonight.” Toni went and looked at the shoe options they picked out, thankful that her friends lended out a helping hand.

“We think the all-white Nike’s would look great with your outfit. Plus it will give your feet a break from the heels and you can run around as you play the game with your boyfriend,” Rocky smirked when Toni gave her a dirty look at her use of the “B” word.

“I agree,” she told them. After bending down to put her sneakers on, Toni stood up and examined her outfit in the mirror, liking how it looked. The white bodysuit accentuated her curves and the light blue jeans and sneakers really brought everything together, making her feel comfortable but be cute at the same time. Toni sprayed her perfume and got her crossbody bag and phone, listening to her friends give her a pep talk as she walked to the front door.

“We put some wipes in your bag and some mints as well just in case your breath gets hot,” Sage said, following behind Toni.

“Oh yes and some pepper spray if he decides to get handsy,” Raquel continued, bringing up the rear, “You never know he can turn into an asshole when the clock strikes twelve.”

Sage gave Rocky a glare and nudged her, “I doubt it will come to that, Racquel but it is always good to be safe.”

“Yes, it is,” Rocky grumbled, rubbing her sore side. Sage may be small but her elbow had some power behind it.

Toni turned to them when they reached the door, “Thanks guys for all the help.”

“We got your back girl, you know that.”

“And have fun tonight please, you deserve it and it will do you good to get some dick. It might help you stop being so damn uptight.”

“Sage!” Toni gasped, hitting the girl’s arm while Rocky stood next to her nodding in agreeance.

“I can’t stand you guys.” Toni picked up the keys she left on the small table by the door and opened her arms, “Alright give me some loving.”

They all came in for a group hug, just like they always did back in college, “Love you hoes,” Toni murmured.

“We love you too,” Sage and Rocky said together.

*****************************************************************************************************

Pulling into the parking lot Toni texted Chris letting him know she had arrived and while she waited on his reply she stared down at her phone and went through her social media. Suddenly a knock on her window made her jolt in the seat and look up with a hand to her chest. She let out a breath when she saw it was Chris at her window, his eyebrow raised and his mouth curved into a smirk.

“Geez Chris, you scared the shit out of me,” Toni exclaimed through the closed window.

She reached next to her, to get her purse and took her keys out of the ignition, placing them and her phone into her bag. She unlocked the door and he opened it for her, a smile still residing on his lips, “My bad ma, I didn’t mean to scare you.”

Toni side-eyed him as she got out, “Liar, you know damn well it’s too dark for your ass to be playing games.”

“Oh shit, don’t tell me big bad Antonia is scared of the dark.” Chris closed her car door behind her and Toni hit her key fob locking the vehicle. They began walking through the sparsely lit up parking lot, heading towards the building that had MadeYa Look Escape Room in bright lights at the front.

“Listen, frightening things live in the night, so don’t shame me.”

Chris chuckled as they walked side by side, his hands behind his back, “Nah, no shaming here baby. I used to be the same way, years ago.”

Toni felt a jolt at this new nickname, she hadn’t been called baby from the opposite sex in years and it made her feel warm inside to be hearing it from him. Toni decided to play it cool and not show how much the term of endearment affected her, but she secretly promised herself she would gush about it later in the privacy of her home.

“What made you stop being scared?” Toni asked as they finally reached the entrance.

She went to open the door but his ring covered hand was suddenly on top of hers, making her palm sweat on the cool metal of the handle, “When I became the scary thing to the monsters.”

Toni noticed the sudden shift between them as she gazed into his dark brown orbs. You would think after a statement like that she would be afraid but she felt perfectly fine, safe even. She didn’t know what to think about that, so she intended to not think about it at all.

“I forgot to tell you earlier but you look beautiful,” Chris said, his eyes not leaving hers, he was close enough that he could hear her breath stutter but didn’t comment. Toni bit her lip and pushed a piece of hair behind her ear.

“You got your nose pierced,” she said, surprised. Toni saw the faint glint of the piercing from the glare of the lights and even though she never dated a guy with one it was different and it fit him perfectly.

Chris took note of the change of subject but he nodded anyway and ran his tongue across his bottom lip, making it shine, “You like it?”

“It’s cute,” She said with faux disinterest. Just like last time, with the close proximity they were in Toni could smell his cologne that was dark and subtle. They would kiss if she stood on her tiptoes.

“You ready for me to whoop your ass in this game?” Chris teased, and just like that the spell was broken and the light-hearted flirting came back into play.

Toni scoffed, grateful for the break from the tension “Please, the question is are you ready?”

With her hands still encompassed in his, they both opened the door and went to the front desk to pay and get instructions. The brunette clerk who they later learned was named Debbie was none the wiser to the something that transpired moments before, as she explained rules and questioned which room they wanted to play. While the middle-aged woman was talking, he had his hand rested on the small of Toni’s back and tried as she might she couldn’t focus on anything else but the heat of his palm. Luckily, another couple came in after them and they were able to play against the pair in the zombie apocalypse escape room. Before the game started Toni and Chris set up a bet for whoever solved the most clues even though they were on the same team. Toni ran her hand through her loose curls to put her hair up in a ponytail waiting for the countdown and noticed Chris’s outfit, “You don’t think you’ll get hot running around in your jacket?”

As per usual Chris was clad in all black but he had on a jean jacket over a black shirt this time rather than a regular button-up.

“I’m straight,” Chris said nonchalantly. Before she could interrogate him further, Debbie’s voice came onto the intercom letting them know she was starting the countdown. Quickly, ten seconds turned to one, and the game began.

*****************************************************************************************************

The couple walked out of the room breathless and delighted with how well the game turned out. They beat the newlyweds by a landslide with one minute to spare, and unfortunately to Chris’s exasperation, Toni solved most of the clues and now she had full reign over tonight.

“Congrats guys!” The clerk complimented as she handed them two free t-shirts for winning and even offered to snap a picture of them to put on their winner board. Chris declined grumbling about how he hated taking pictures but of course, when Toni gave him puppy dog eyes and reminded him she was the captain of tonight he grudgingly relented. Only on the grounds of them taking the photo on their personal phones and that Toni promised not to rag on him the rest of the date.

Toni gave the woman her phone already opened to the camera app and they both took their place in front of the winner’s board. She didn’t know where to position herself, not wanting to be too much in Chris’s personal space if he wasn’t comfortable with it, but he made the decision for her when he put his arm on her shoulders and brought her in close, making Toni’s palms sweat. She quickly decided to wrap her arms around his waist praying he couldn’t feel her heart practically beat out her chest when she leaned against his side. They both looked at the camera with big smiles earning an “Awww you two are adorable!” from Debbie.

As Toni went to pull away, she brushed against something solid and what felt oddly like steel under his jacket. Stepping back Toni pondered over the fact that the object that she touched was most likely a gun and that was probably the reason why he didn’t want to take off his jacket before the game.

“Here you go hun,” Debbie said, passing Toni her phone.

Toni graciously thanked her while she took the device and tried to school her features. She knew people had guns, even her father had some locked away at his house but something about him hiding it made her stomach roll.

They went out into the cool night and Toni walked next to Chris quietly still thinking, “So where to boss, since you running shit now.”

A beat passed and she could see Chris in her peripheral take a look at her, wondering why she wasn’t responding.

“You good mama?” He inquired.

She was acting like such a dumb ass, it wasn’t like he was her boyfriend he didn’t have to necessarily tell her why he had a gun and she was fine when he told her the monsters were afraid of him. So why did the gun affect her so much?

Toni looked over at him seeing his brows knitted in worry and decided to push the issue aside for a second. “Yep, but the real question is are you good after that ass whooping I gave you? Mr. I’m gonna win just watch.”

Chris groaned, “I thought you promised you wasn’t gonna flame me.”

“Obviously I lied, I just wanted you to stop whining and take the damn picture.”

“Nah, I just think you wanted a pic so you could look at it and fantasize about me all the time.”

Toni snickered and pushed him, “Please, don’t flatter yourself.”

They were still talking when they finally reached her car. Toni leaned against her door, she could see his Range a couple of spaces from hers. “So what now Antonia?”

He asked while he stood in front of her, his hands in his pockets.

“Not sick of me yet?” Toni wondered, tilting her head.

“Never that darlin’.’”

Toni cleared her throat feeling her cheeks burn, damn him, he knew exactly what the hell he was doing. Not wanting to put it off any longer she made the choice to just ask him about the gun, not wanting to proceed with the night without being in the know. “Can I...ugh this is probably so stupid but can I ask you a question first before we leave here?”

He straightened when he heard the way she stuttered like she was worried about questioning him, “Go ahead.”

Toni crossed her arms, “You can tell me it's none of my business and honestly it’s not that big of a deal but is there a reason why you didn’t want to tell me you were carrying a gun? I felt it while we were taking the picture.”

She was expecting him to get upset about her interrogation but his posture went lax, seeming happy that that was what she wanted to ask.

“I didn’t say anything ‘cause I wasn’t sure if it was gonna freak you out. I use it for protection only and I should have told you instead of assuming.”

Toni sighed and rubbed her forehead, “No, I apologize it just took me by surprise is all. I knew someone that carried and it always seemed like he used it more to showcase how much of a dick he was rather than use it as a safety precaution.”

“Hey,” Chris raised Toni’s chin, making her focus on him. “Don’t ever be scared to ask me somethin’. Even if I don’t like the question, imma always try and give you as much of the truth that I can, aight?”

“Okay,” Toni said.

“Okay,” Chris dropped his hand and grabbed Toni’s holding it in his grasp, still looking at her, “So we gonna chill in this parking lot all night or we gonna go to the next spot?”

Toni lightly squeezed his hand with a mischievous glint in her eye, “I know the perfect place.”

“Aiight then,” Chris walked to the passenger side of her car waiting, “Let’s go.”

“You’re not gonna drive your car?” Toni wrinkled her nose, puzzled whilst unlocking the car.

Chris opened the door and simply said, “Nope I trust you,” before getting into the vehicle leaving Toni speechless.

Toni let out a harsh breath and whispered “This man is too fine,” getting into the car as well. It seemed like their night had only begun.

Tag list: @aria725 @kikilovesdankmemes @briannab1234

#manny montana imagine #rio good girls #rio good girls imagine #rioxoc #rio x black!oc #rioxblack!oc fanfic #nbc good girls #chapter 4 #unravel me #manny montana #myfic

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saintobio · 3 years

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hiii i'm loving wastelands soooo much your writing is just *chef's kiss* and even tho the series hasn't finished yet i already know its gonna hurt me LMAOOO but I LOVE ANGST so yaaay,,, anyway idk if someone already asked this but i need to know on what exact day you usually update wastelands? is it on monday? cause i want to make a reminder so i wont miss your update sjdjjd

Anonymous said

went to work today so if u ever decide to update 😌 one thing abt wastelands its making sure i get my work DONE lmaooo

Anonymous said

doing all ten of my papers due at the end of the week so i can grieve in peace by the time u post the next chapter

Anonymous said

promise its not to rush you id never do it in my life but if u have a date for the next update, can u tell us because 😭 i literally reread every past chapter before the new one comes out every single ud LMFAOOO thank uuuuu ily

hey nonnies sorry for getting back to you guys so late, i’ve just finished writing chapter 4 and am just currently editing to make it more hurtful sjsjdn but it will be updated tomorrow, friday 4pm PST.

it seems that i always end up updating every mondays and fridays so ig i’ll try to stick to that updating schedule (given that i’m not busy with workload) thanks so much for anticipating my updates <3

#tobiochans.asks #series.wastelands

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writing-by-candlelight · 3 years

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My (hopeful) Update Schedule that I will try to stick to:

Monday: Every time i hope its Sugar, but for the length of existence its always been Salt

Tuesday: Mindlink

Wednesday: Random unfinished story of the following x x x x

Thursday: TUA watches the show, TUA watches the show take 2

Friday: Smiles are Lies of Omission and mine is Fractured Glass

Saturday: Eternal Kingdom: A Black Family Memoir, Written by Sirius Orion Black III

Sunday: Flipping Pages, Flipping Time

Take this with a grain of Salt, I am a mood writer and may ot write anything at all some weeks.

Summaries:

Every time i hope its Sugar, but for the length of existence its always been Salt:

Every year Hogwarts uses her magic to send out letters to the broken, the bruised, the fractured, the scratched, the hurt.She gathers her damaged children in her arms, sends them letters shortly past midnight on their first day, and has them gather in the depths of her bosom. The Room of Requirement.Harry receives one such letter and joins this group of defeated souls. There he meets a Dead-eyed Malfoy, Splintered Parkinson, Selectively mute Edgecomb, Demolished Pucey, Wrecked Carrow twins, a Diggory in Denial, and a Weasley that is barely holding onto sanity with his newfound creature blood. They talk in a mockery of Group Therapy, gossip, play games, watch movies, and try to heal together.Who knows? Maybe they'll slaughter a Riddle along the way?

Basically I pull all the kids I think are abused and make them go to group therapy

Mindlink:

An accident connects the minds of 3 boys in a way that alters history. But when magic gives, magic must take. One becomes Mute. One becomes Blind. One becomes Deaf. Having to rely on each other, they must set differences aside to even survive, let alone defeat Voldemort.

After Fred experiments on a potion and blows up part of the great hall; Percy, Draco, and Harry are linked and can read each others minds. As a consequence they have to rely on each other as Percy is deaf, Draco is mute, and Harry is blind.

TUA watches the show:

The Hargreeves siblings are 19. Luther has just been experimented on. Vanya has just started her book. Klaus has just gotten out of rehab. And now they are transported to a room to watch a show. A show about their lives.

What it says on the tin, but we love and respect Luther in this household.

TUA watches the show take 2:

Breakfast was as it had been for the last 13 years of their lives. Orange juice and oatmeal during the week; pancakes, eggs, and bacon on sundays. Arguments would break out and they would laugh, their father was never there after all. This breakfast a letter appeared from thin air. Now they would watch their dysfunctional adult selves, and have to try to prevent the trauma of their future.

Same as above but as children 3 days before Five disappears, we still love and respect Luther and Klaus is sober.

Smiles are Lies of Omission and mine is Fractured Glass:

At first glance Hogwarts seems to bubble with happiness, its aura of contentment weaving through the towers and tunnels and stairwells like a complex tapestry. And while the building and its grounds may be a safe-haven for many a student, the fact remains that they need a millenia old castle to keep them safe in the first place.Once Hogwarts stood as a mighty protector from witch hunts. But times have changed, and so have the needs of the children. They no longer need protection from the outside - they need protection from their friends, their families, and even themselves.Yet Hogwarts, no matter how magnificent and loving and sentient, is only a castle made from smooth and spiderwebbed stone. But after a century of hard work - and the extra power the ambient magic of visiting schoolchildren grants her - she has finally gained enough power to manifest a body.And just in time for the generation that needs her love the most.

A soul song fic (if you haven't read those please do) where everyone's secrets get aired in the form of songs with projected memories! Draco is abused and also genderfluid! Blaise is insane! Fred and George are NOT the same person! *gasps and shock all around*

Eternal Kingdom: A Black Family Memoir; Written by Sirius Orion Black III:

Sirius Black. The Last of the Black Family. They are seen as warped and evil and mad. Sirius won't let them die that way. He may dislike their views. But this was his family. And he is the last.

Sirius, as last of the Black family, wanders around part of Grimmauld place that he sealed off (the entirety of the mansion, because you cannot convince me that the Ancient and most noble house of black lived in a townhouse) as he writes the family memoir. Though he didn't agree with their views they are family and he wont let them go down is history as pure evil.

Flipping Pages, Flipping Time:

During the Winter Solstice of 1930, before world war II and the creation of the oath, two groups of heroes fall into the olympian throne room. One group are immortal heroes of old. Pulled from their whereabouts in 1930, they are there to learn about the future. The other group are heroes of the future, the strongest demigods to date. They are there to prevent anything like their lives from happening again. (I tried to write more powerful and less cartoonish versions of the gods, closer to my interpretation of mythology. But something about Zeus and Athena always gets by blood boiling. And I always favor Dionysus. You'll have to deal with it.)

A Percy Jackson reads the books fic with emphasis on the trauma and sadness and without the copy-paste jokes every fic seems to have (this is not a bash i love those fics). Serious!Apollo, ExtremelyPowerful!Dionysus, Warrior!Aphrodite and many more!!!! Why are their future selves so strange, and what is wrong with Hermes!!!

#percy jackson #harry potter #sirius black #regulus black #fanfiction #the umbrella academy #klaus hargreeves

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wroteasongabouther · 5 years

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>> Darling << part 4 ➭ harry tequila always wins

fic page // talk to me about it!

warnings: smut, alcohol, cursing, and maybe some second-hand embarrassment

authors note: if you started reading this fic over a year ago and are here for by far the latest update ever thank you deserve a gold star. lets hope the next update wont take me so long. buckle up boys and girls, it’s a long one.. hope u like it xx

—

December 3rd, 2021

To be a great business woman meant you also needed to be a great sociallite.

Parties were being held nearly every weekend here in New York by the wealthy business men and woman. And with it becoming a younger crowd year by year, the parties got bigger and better. Tonight’s theme was a white out party. You suppose it worked out well as the first snowfall of the year hits the city the very same night.

It’s no surprise that your stylist outdid herself. You wore a bralette styled top, high waisted white pants, white heels, and of course a flare of your extra self with a white faux fur jacket. With your freshly highlighted hair blown out by the cold winter wind and a dark red lip, you knew you were the hottest one to walk into the party. The long stares from both men and woman told you so too.

Upon your arrival, you waste no time give your very expensive jacket to coat check before making your way to the bar. The alluring feel to be all wide eyed and enjoy these parties were long over for you. No, instead you needed nice buzz to actually make it through any of these events.

“You look amazing tonight,” a fellow business woman from Westbrook Atlantic grins as you approach an awaiting group.

“Thank you,” you smile, “crazy how it’s snowing today, right?”

The handful of people you had the attention of all nod and give you the usual fake-interested look you were getting used to now. But then suddenly their gaze all fall to the new addiction to the group. Looking to your left, you see you won’t be avoiding Harry tonight.

He had spotted you and made his choice of socializing tonight it seems. You roll your eyes as everyone asks Harry about his newest deal. Stupid deal may you say, he was going to lose a shit ton of money in the end result.

“You’ve made better choices,” you state with a tight smile before bringing your drink to your lips.

“Oh really?” He challenges you, raising a brow.

“Yeah, I met with Vanessa just last month actually. Sure she’s got the assets but does she really have the brain to carry out such a deal she proposed?” You say.

Harry catches onto your play of words immediately, the others around maybe not so much. While they have questions, Harry simply gives you the slightest glare. If he really expected you to be the same girl who shut up and agreed with him while around business talks, he was sadly mistaken.

You didn’t see the harm in poking some fun at him. This Vanessa girl probably dressed as she did when you had her come to your office too. You didn’t think her boobs could be pushed any higher and her butt screamed fake. Something you’re sure Harry liked about her proposal. It wouldn’t surprise you if he signed with her and then fucked her right afterwards.

Anything to get his dick wet, you knew his damn ways.

“I’m not sure that’s a way for a woman in your position to be speaking of other woman in the business,” Harry says, his lips just twitching to curl up into his well known smirk. “Are you insinuating that Vanessa couldn’t hold up a good deal, because she’s a woman,” he’s playing one of his stupid games, and earning spectators around you two.

“That’s not at all-”

“You’d think that you’d be jumping at the opportunity to help woman in this business, not to try and tear them down,”

“I’d say the same thing if it was a lousy man giving me the same proposal that she did,” you state through gritted teeth.

How could he start such a conversation? He knew damn well that the people around the two of you would start rumours off any little lie he made up. He also knew that you once scolded him for the very same thing. Back when you worked for him. You always knew a part of him didn’t think a woman could handle any serious CEO business - but you also proved him wrong each and every day.

“Quite the statements you’ve made tonight, miss,” Harry smirks, “I should go speak with Mr Griffen, please, excuse me.”

And then he’s wondering off. Not before turning to look over his shoulder at you with that same devious smirk on his face. He knew what he had done, planned it rather quickly on the spot too.

You didn’t get a chance to talk to Harry again the whole night. No, instead you were playing damage control to the mess that Harry started at the beginning of the night. Woman were coming up to you, bickering your ear off about how disrespectful you could be for saying a woman didn’t have the brains for this business. Then you’d have to repeat over and over again your apology for the misunderstanding Harry had of your words. And as you did this, Harry always stood a fair distance away that he could catch your gaze every few moments.

And now here you were at the end of what had to have been the least fun you’ve ever had at an event before.

You’re tipping your head back and feeling the burn of liquor drain down your throat. It was unlike you to do a ton of shots though, in fact you’ve only gotten truly wasted three whole times in your life. And that’s what you were planning on doing, getting so freaking wasted that you’d forget about the horror of a night tonight turned into. You think back on the other times you’ve gotten wasted in your short life time.

The first time was at the fresh age of 16, Peter McDonald had stole a bottle of some brown substance and brought it over to some party - letting you grip the neck of it for most of the night. Thing was, it was your first party you ever attended. You didn’t know when to put the bottle down.

Plus, Peter was just trying to get into your pants.

Too bad you puked all over them before the night was over and ended up being yelled at by your parents for days on end over the whole ordeal.

The other 2 times were because of the very reason you knew you were downing your fifth shot in the past ten minutes. His green eyes taunting you from across the bar. Why hadn’t he left yet? You think as you glare at him. A shiver runs across your skin as another shot of tequila burns down your throat.

“Give me another, Darren,” you order the bartender the moment you shot glasses hits the bar top.

Flashbacks to the first time you had legally gotten black out drunk came flooding back as the familiar middle aged bartender poured you another shot of tequila.

—

December 14th, 2018

“I need this,” you say. It sounded like you were trying to convince yourself as you stared at the reflection staring back at you.

“Babe, you like so need this,” your best friend, and roommate, Samantha states from where the bathroom she’s currently made a mess up while getting ready.

You really freaking needed this night out on the town with your girls. Breanne and Chelsea were meeting you two at the club, the three of them had this master plan of begging you to come but after the first month of working for Harry had passed by - you needed this. So you did yourself up, curling your hair and putting on maybe a bit too much highlighter. Samantha let you borrow her newest black lace bodysuit - clearly meant to be a piece of sexy lingerie.

You wondered if Harry liked lingerie.

Shaking your head slightly, you focus back on your reflection as you touch up your lipstick. Before sliding it into the front pocket of your leather material pants. On second thought, you take out the lipstick seeing as the pants were too tight for anything to really fit in the pockets. So you open your closet and find the small white purse you kept hidden away for nights like this.

“Okay, Bre and Chels are like hailing a cab down now so we should leave soon too in order to meet up in line together,” Samantha explains, eyes cast down on her phone before looking up. Her eyes go wide at the sight of you all dressed up. “Or maybe we can skip the line all together if you just like pout those pretty lips at security,” she smiles.

“Oh shut up,” you roll your eyes and walk to where your phone was charging to unplug it and slip it into your purse. “Should I wear the boots or the open toe heels?”

“Heels, you’re already going to be cold in that top so might as well freeze your perfect little toes too,”

“My toes aren’t perfect,”

“Oh yes they are,” Samantha huffs while sipping up her thigh high boots. She went for a mini skirt and crop top look tonight, obviously looking hot as hell. Didn’t take much effort from her though.

“Ok you perv,” you chuckle.

Samantha laughs along with you and within minutes you’re both downstairs making minimal effort in hailing down a cab. Of course Samantha makes another comment about how your “hotness” got them a cab right away on this busy Friday evening in New York. But it was New York, there was cabs everywhere you looked.

You’re flipping your hair out of your face while looking down the line at the club when someone from behind the ropes steps up to you. He’s wearing a navy suit with a white button up under - the top two buttons undone, a gold chain barely visible around his neck.

“Hey,” he says, a grin upon his face. And it’s a nice face. He must be Lebanese if you had to guess. Perfectly Styles black hair, with perfectly trimmed facial hair and piercing blue eyes.

“Hi,” you reply.

“How many are in your party, beautiful?” He slides the compliment in smoothly. You can’t help the blush that creeps to your cheeks. At this point you notice the ear piece and thin wire that is tucked nearly behind his ear before disappearing under his shirt.

“Four,” you answer with a smile.

“Perfect, I’d love to escort you in,”

“Okay,” you nod.

Samantha doesn’t waste any time grabbing onto Breanna and Chelsea and pulling them from the line, all three of them picking up their pace in order to cut in line with you. The gorgeous man smiles at you all before unhooking the rope and letting you through.

“Told you so,” Samantha is singing in your ear as you all stick close together in the buzzing club.

You quickly figure out the man that let you in is one of the managers of the establishment. He orders a round of tequila shots, then a few drinks too. At first he’s friendly to the four of you, but then he’s turned his back to your friends and is asking you questions.

“So what do you do for work?” He asks. It’s a regular old question, but one that causes your stomach to turn and heart to pick up its pace.

“Um, I’m an assistant for a pretty big businessman I guess,” you answer with a shrug before bringing your drink to your lips and taking a generous sip.

“Oh nice,” he smiles, “do you like it?”

“Uh, yeah, sure,” you stumble on your answer, eyes drifting over his shoulder to where your three friends were now taking shots with some other girls.

“Suppose work isn’t a great talking subject for you, huh?” The man teases. “Did you want another shot?”

You nod, giving him a tight smile before he waves over the bartender again. Just as your tipping your head back, the manager seems to be called away as he presses a few fingers to his left ear in order to hear what’s being said into the earpiece in his right ear. Next thing you know he’s telling the bartender to put your drinks on his tab, brushing back your hair off your shoulder gently to whisper into your ear.

“Enjoy your night off, hopefully you’ll stick around long enough for me to escort you out,” he says, leaning back to give you a wink before he’s slipping away from you at the bar and into the crowd.

“Did you get his number?” Breanna asks as the three of your friends walk up to you.

“No,” you shrug and slowly let the corner of your lips curl upwards, “but I got our drinks covered for the night,”

“Oh my god!” Chelsea shouts, her mouth wide open in shock.

“That’s it, you’re coming out with us all the time now, you hot bitch,” Breanna exclaims before pushing her chest into the bar, her breasts nearly spilling right out of the top she’s wearing, as she waves down a bartender. “We’ll get eight tequila shots, please,” she shouts out with a grin.

“Oh, we’re so getting wasted tonight,” Chelsea smiles, pulling up her phone to take a video of the bartender pouring the shots - of course turning the camera to you after, causing you to giggle and hide your face.

“You need this, Y/N,” Samantha repeats her words from earlier in the night, “you’ve been working like a damn dog, now let’s let loose and enjoy this night,”

After downing the two tequila shots each, Chelsea is leading the way to the dance floor. The thumping of the bass, with the crazy light show and within seconds you can feel all those shots you just took. You’re jumping up and down, grabbing onto Samantha’s shoulder to shout out the lyrics of the song playing around you. And for almost two hours, you never once think of Harry.

That is until you’re sitting alone in a booth, pulling your phone out for the first time tonight to see a ton of messages from your boss - and your potential booty call? No, you tell yourself as you read the texts.

Harry: I need you to change my schedule for next weekend, clear all meetings. I will still take phone calls.

Harry: I also need my dry cleaning picked up before noon tomorrow.

Harry: Coffee and breakfast by 7.

Harry: And don’t wear any underwear.

Harry: Hello?

Harry: Y/N look at your damn phone.

Harry: Call me right when you get these messages.

You sigh before typing away at your screen.

Y/N: I don’t think I’m fit to call you at this moment, Mr Styles..

Harry: What do you mean by that? And why are ignoring my texts?

Y/N: I mean that I am currently unable to talk on the phone. Not in the best state of mind for a quick chat with my boss.

Harry: What the hell do you mean?

Harry: Are you drunk?

You rolls your eyes at your screen. Before you can even type out your response, Harry has sent another message.

Harry: Where are you?

Y/N: it’s none of your business actually

Harry: Actually it is completely my business, if you value your damn job I suggest you tell me what the hell you think you’re doing.

Y/N: I’m just living my life Harry. Let me live.

And with that, you slide your phone back into your purse. Your hearts racing as you stare across the booth. A hiccup passes your lips. Then all of a sudden you don’t feel so good. Slipping out from the booth you push your way past the people in VIP to get to the bathrooms. Once the door of the stall is shut behind you, you’re leaning over the toilet and taking deep breathes. Nothing comes up, thank god, but it was a close call.

Maybe that feeling in your stomach wasn’t the threat of tequila coming back up. Maybe it was because you just told off your freaking boss.

You groan and lean your head back against the cool metal of the stall. Tequila made you do some dumb shit.

You don’t remember how long you stood in the stall before someone knocking and asking if you’re alright. Then you’re back in the VIP section and unable to find any of your friends. Pulling out your cell phone, you go to unlock it and call up Samantha but instead you’re bombarded by incoming calls from Mr Harry Styles.

“And somehow you look just as stunning with a frown on your face,” you turn at the voice of the bar manager. “What’s got you frowning?” He asks, stepping up in front of you now.

“I-I don’t know where my friends are and my stupid boss is bugging me,” you explain, not even realizing that you’re pouting afterwards.

“I could check the cameras for your friends, if you wanted to come to the back with me?” He’s peering at you through his lashes. Something that maybe a couple hours ago you’d find sexy, and maybe you would go to the back with him for a quick fuck. But now all you could picture was Harry’s stupid green eyes and stupid stupid face.

“I think I’m going to go home,” and with that statement you turn on your heels to head out of this place. Only you seem to have forgotten in your foggy drunken state just how unstable you are, falling forward straight onto the floor.

“Shit,” the manager cursed as he kneels down beside you. “Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” you grumble while brushing your hands on your thighs, leaning back on your feet as you sat on the dirty bar floor. Suppose these pants were trash now, you think while looking at the scuffed material at your knees.

“Here, let me help you find a cab,”

“I need another shot,” you order while taking his hands and getting back to your feet.

“I think you’ve had enough-“

“No,” you snap, “I need another damn shot now,”

“Okay,” he nods and leads you to the bar instead.

Maybe it’s the powerful tone you used. Or maybe it’s cause he still wants to fuck you. But the bar manager nods and leads you to the bar once again. One shot turns into two as you try to blur out the thoughts of Harry. God where did Samantha go? You think while glancing around the club.

“I’ve got to go back to work,” the bar manager tries again. You sigh and close your eyes, resting your chin in the palm of your hand as your elbow rests on the sticky bar top. “Keep an eye on her,” he says to the bartender.

It doesn’t take long before another guy is slide up next to you. He’s cute, got that typical ‘I’ll fuck you then never talk to you again’ hair cut that’s shaved at the sides and long at the top. Clean shaved and sporting a coy smile.

“Dance with me,” he say.

You’re about to grab ahold of his hand and let him lead the way when you suddenly recognize Breanna and Chelsea walking towards you. A grin spreads across your face at the sight of your friends.

“Hey!” You shout while wrapping them both in for a hug.

The fuckboy seems to get the clue you’ve lost interest in him and walks off without you. It’s probably for the best, you’d look like an outright fool trying to dance all sexy out there. Tequila made for some sloppy dancing from you.

“We’re about to head out,” Breanna states, rubbing your back which brings a soft smile from you.

“Have you seen Samantha?” You ask.

“Not since she started making out with that guy back on the dance floor,” Breanna says.

“Pretty sure she left with him,” Chelsea adds.

“Nice,” you smirk and lean your head on Breanna’s shoulder. “Well, I for one had a ton of fun with you girls tonight,” you’re shouting out the words with maybe a bit too much excitement. Breanna and Chelsea laugh, hugging you once more before asking if you were ok by yourself.

You had hope a certain gorgeous bar manager would be making his way back to the VIP section.

After your friends have left, you’re walking back to the bar and leaning over it slightly as you go on your tip toes in order to get the bartenders attention. He’s watching you in between pouring a few shots for some other customers. Then as your pushing your cleavage together he’s resting both hands on either side of where you were leaning towards him, head tilting up with a smirk.

“You’re trouble,” he states, voice much lower than you expected. He’s hot. Like slightly older guy kinda hot. He’s got a nice moustache, a few lines around his grey eyes. Hell, he’s like really hot for his age - you think while biting down on your bottom lip.

“Maybe,” you counter back. “I’d like another shot of tequila, please,” you order with a smile while slowly leaning back from the bar.

The bartender doesn’t move at first, instead his eyes are drinking you in. Suppose this bodysuit - or lingerie or whatever - was really working for you. Then all of a sudden his grey eyes flicker over your shoulder. He stiffen immediately, then stands up straight and tall. What in the world-

“Actually she won’t be having any more tequila,” you could recognize that voice anywhere. Harry was here. Like right here, stepping up beside you in the same suit he was wearing earlier today. The same suit you had your hands wrapped around as he fucked you in the janitors closet. “Seems you’ve given her enough tonight Darren,” Harry adds with a dark look to the bartender.

“Um, no,” you pipe up, leaning back over the bar quickly to grasp the bartender - Darren’s attention. “Tequila, now,” you demand this time.

Darren looks from you, back to Harry, then back to you again to give you a small smile. And then he’s walking away. What the hell, you think.

“What are you doing here?” You question, turning a bit too quickly to face Harry as you sway a little bit. Harry reacts by grabbing your arm to settle your drunken movements. You shrug from his grasp right away. Seems Harry doesn’t like it, eyes narrowing in at you before his hand is back by his side.

“I’m here to take you home, think you’ve had enough fun tonight,” he says the word fun with more of an angry tone.

“No,”

“No?” Harry raises an eyebrow at you.

“Yes, no,” you say while lifting your chin up.

“Not making a lot of sense, darling,” he mutters. You notice how his jaw is clenched, eyes hard before they wander around the VIP section.

He seems to find who or whatever he’s looking for as he takes a few steps behind you. This is your chance, you think with a smile as you turn back to the bartender and flip your hair from your face. He’s standing back in front of you as you give him a wave.

“Tequila, please,” you sing.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea-“

“Look, Denis,” you pause as your eyes narrow into small slits. “If you don’t pour me another double shot of tequila so I can continue on with my night, I will make your life a living hell,”

“Put the claws away, Y/N,” Harry’s back standing behind you. “No more to drink, you’re leaving now,”

“No!” You shout at him as you turn to face him maybe a bit too quickly. Your stomach sloshing at the movements. “You’re not the boss of me,” you add.

“Actually, I am,” he smirks. Bastard, you think as you glare at him. “Put her tab on my card, Darren,” Harry says, his eyes not leaving yours as he places his credit card on the bar.

“The manager was covering my tab tonight,” you state, lips curling up into a smirk to match his.

“Actually, I fired him,”

“Fired? What do you think you just own this whole damn city?” You question, crossing your arms at your chest.

“Well, I do own this club,” Harry says, “so, yes, he’s fired,”

“Bullshit,” you roll your eyes as the anger seems to be rolling off you now. Your drunk was no more happy all thanks to your crazy boss.

“Thank you,” Harry says to Darren as he takes back his card, eyes skimming the receipt briefly. “Jesus, were you trying to drink yourself to bloody stupidity?” he asks before shoving the receipt into his pocket.

“Well my friends were with me, so like they had some drinks too obviously,” you shrug and lean back against the bar.

“Where are your friends now?”

You shrug again and find yourself watching him through your blurring vision. Didn’t matter how many men here tried to make a move. Harry Styles was by far the hottest most sexy of them all. Maybe it was a good call to not have another shot of tequila so you could fuck the-

Your thoughts are cut short as you feel sick suddenly. Running past Harry, you push open the bathroom door, locking the first open stall in sight before clasping to your knees and throwing up into the toilet bowl. Your ears are ringing as you barely make out the sounds in the bathroom around you. Some girl is shouting, then your heads in the toilet again as you gag out more contents of your stomach.

“Y/N,” Harry’s voice is soft from the other side of the stall. You close your eyes and lean against the side of the stall, the metal was cool like it was earlier too. “Are you okay?” Harry asks.

“I’m fine, Harry,” you answer in a sarcastic tone, smiling as you look over to see his favourite YSL boots on the other side of the door.

“Unlock the door,” he orders.

You roll your eyes and stand on your wobbly heels. Placing both hands on the door, you let out a deep breath before whipping the door open and pushing passed Harry. You needed to rinse your mouth, you think while stepping up to the sink. After doing so you look up into the mirror. Your eyes find Harry in the reflection right away. He has his back to you for a few moments, shoulders rise up before falling slowly back down to his composed posture he always has. When he turns around to face you, taking the step steps towards you, you can see the anger in his eyes.

You fucked up.

“Don’t yell at me,” the words slip past your lips before you can stop them. Then suddenly you’re pouting at him too.

Damn tequila.

“I want to do a lot more than yell at you, pet,” Harry says through clenched teeth.

It’s the first time you’re alone with him now. Glancing around you notice that Harry had kicked everyone out of the bathroom. You brush your hands against your hips, the lace rough before you touch the cool leather of your pants. Harry looks at you through the reflection in the mirror, he’s towering over your figure - so close you can feel his hot breath on your neck.

“Like what?” You question, your tone once again taken over from the tequila in your system - what were you doing teasing your boss after you just threw up only moments ago?

Harry doesn’t answer - verbally. Instead he grips your hips with both his hands, his touch rough and firm, pulling your body into his. You react with a quick gasp, then he’s lifting one hand up to your throat. Harry gently squeezes, while you widen your eyes and stare at him in the mirror once again. There’s no denying how your core is pulsing between your legs. There’s also no missing the hardness pressed against your lower back. A glimpse of desire crosses Harry’s face. Lips spread into a wicked smile, his eyes hooded as they gaze back at you through the reflection.

“I want to fuck the recklessness out of you,” he speaks as though he’s craving the mere idea of it.

Harry tights his grip at your throat as his other hand snakes around to the front of your pants. There wasn’t a doubt in your mind that he would do exactly what he just stated he wanted. Harry Styles made it pretty clear over this past month that he always got what he wanted.

“I want you to know who’s the boss of you,” he continues, “I want you to stutter over my name as I show you exactly who’s the boss of you,”

A whimper gets caught in your throat as you ache to be touched. You had learnt over time that Harry had a way with his words - and he knew it too. The way he’d just simply reword something to sound more seductive in the office, it always got to you.

“I want it,” you utter the three words Harry loved the most.

He pops the button of your pants undone, sliding down the zipper before running his fingertip over the lace that was apart of your bodysuit situation. The motion causes you to quiver under his touch, you moving only results in Harry’s grip tightening - both at you throat and your hip.

You don’t even realize that you had closed your eyes as they flutter open once more and catch Harry’s dark greens in the mirror. His chest is rising and falling at a faster pace than normal. In that moment it’s almost as though you read his mind.

“Please,” you say just above a whisper.

Harry has your pants to your knees in only two swift movements, and that’s impressive considering just how tight the leather material was. He rips the material of the bodysuit just as quick, the veins in his hands pulsing as he does so, and you barely have a second to think of how upset Samantha is going to be you ripped her lingerie. Your bare bum is lifted up to the damp counter top, your hands falling back to grip on of the sinks while your head smacks back into the mirror. Harry’s hands are at his own body now, but only for a few moments as he slips his hard cock out of his pants.

Your stomach feels like giants are stomping inside, while you can hear your own pulse in your ears loud and clear. There’s no sound coming from your mouth but it’s open, maybe in shock or maybe in anticipation - you were too drunk to really know.

Harry only brushes the tip of him between your soaking slits once before he’s pushing himself into you - hard. You gasp, a burning feeling overcoming you between your legs. But then he’s moving, fast, pounding into you in quick hard meaningful thrusts. With each thrust a gasp escapes your lips. Harry moves a hand back to your throat, which you react by leaning back more in order to give his hand more room to choke you. The warm feeling in the pit of your stomach grows quick as Harry fucks you hard on the bathroom sink.

You lose it when he rubs your clit, not soft in any way, no he wants to get your release out of the way almost. And when your body is pulsing under his touch, waves of your orgasm rippling through your entire body, he slips out of you completely and flips your body so your stomach is flat against the counter. Harry positions himself between your legs again before entering your warm wet cunt. You moan at the sensitive feeling as he fucks you some more.

Lifting your head, you meet your own glassy eyes first. Glassy from the drinks you’ve downed tonight, and from the pleasure you’re feeling right in this moment now. Just has Harry’s thrusts begin to slow, you raise your gaze to look at him instead. What a sight, you think as his eyes are closed and his mouth is open. Within seconds you feel him finish inside of you. Warm and oozing between your thighs as he slips out slowly.

You shut your eyes for a moment as you focus on your breathing. This was by far the quickest fuck you and Harry have had. Maybe even the roughest. And it was definitely hot. God, just thinking about how his hand felt around your throat made you want to pull him in for another round.

“Pull up your pants,” Harry demands.

Your eyes flutter open, meeting Harry’s serious eyes. Standing on wobbling feet, you reach for your pants and pull them up to your hips again. You have to tuck in the ends of the bodysuit, while you could still feel the wetness between your thighs. Suppose Harry didn’t feel like helping you clean up today.

“Where are your keys?” Harry’s questions causes you to turn and look at where he stood now. He was by the stall, going through your purse.

“My roommate has them,” you answer.

“And she is where?”

“I, I don’t know,” you reply sheepishly. Eyes cast down to the floor as you realize you’ve made yourself look like even a biggest fool in front of Harry.

“Suppose you can stay at mine,” Harry mutters.

You nod while brushing your hands through your hair. There was this feeling at the pit of your stomach. Tonight was gone to absolute shit. Harry was going to fire you. Let you sleep at his house, and then fire you tomorrow morning. There was no way in hell any of your behaviour was acceptable tonight. How you told him off, ignored his messages, and then somehow managed to fuck him in the public washroom. Your thoughts are running a million miles an hour as Harry leads the way from the bathroom to where he had a car waiting for the two of you outside the club.

Harry doesn’t speak in the car. So neither do you. In fact the cool feeling of the window against your cheek causes you to close your eyes and nearly doze off to sleep. But you’re still aware of the situation you’re currently in, so you force yourself to stay awake till you got into whatever sleeping arrangement Harry had for you.

You steal one glance at Harry during the car ride. The lights from the city night casting into the car and lighting up his high feature of his face. He’s got his knuckles pressed against his lips, something he did while in deep thought quite often, you had taken note of it over the past while now. His eyes are focused forward, but you know he’s zoned out in whatever thoughts are clouding his head. Maybe it was how he was going to fire you tomorrow. You open your mouth for only a second, thinking of slipping out a quick apology, but instead you press them tightly closed once more and look back out the window beside you. Right now you wanted nothing more than to go to sleep and get rid of this foggy feeling all that tequila gave you.

“You can sleep in the guest bedroom, first door on the left down that way.” Harry states, pointing to the hallway at your left as the private elevator for his penthouse opens up.

Harry walks out into the open concept quick. Obviously over the wow factor his home held. It was stunning. The living room, dining room, and kitchen were all one big room. Floor to high ceiling windows across from the wall with the elevator gave him and his guests the best view of the city you could ever imagine. It was decorated with minimalist taste, only greys and blacks - absolutely no colour besides the deep chestnut wood of the floors beneath your feet. You especially liked the dark cabinets and granite that complimented his kitchen beautifully. Harry’s standing at the biggest stainless steel fridge you’ve ever seen.

He closes it and has one bottle of water and one bottle of blue Gatorade in his hand. You begin walking to where he is now, impressed by the appliances in the kitchen. He had a freaking high quality espresso machine that you’ve seen in a Starbucks.

“Drink this when you wake up,” Harry says. He meets your eyes for the first time since leaving the club. “There should be Advil in the cupboard of the en suite too. And drink some of this before you go to sleep,” he orders while placing the Gatorade down first and then the water bottle.

“I know how to help a hangover, Harry,” you state, “I was once in university, you know,”

“I do know,” he nods, “was just thinking you spend that time and all those student loans on your education, not partying,”

“I didn’t always party,” you mutter under your breath. Harry stares at you across the island that you stood on the other side of it. “I just, I needed to let loose and have some fun tonight. I’m sorry that I got you involved in my personal bullcrap of a night,” you finally say half of whats heavy on your chest.

Harry nods once. Then his eyes fall to where a clock was in the kitchen. You follow his gaze and catch sight of the time too. It was nearing 2 in the morning now. A yawn escapes your lips.

“Have a good sleep, darling,” Harry says softly before he’s walking out of the open room and down one of the two hallways.

Sadly he walks down the other hallway, opposite to the one he directed you to where the bed you’d be sleeping in was. You imagine sharing a bed with Harry again like you had the one time back at the hotel, the first time you two had had sex. Since that night you hadn’t fallen asleep beside him since. He fucked you at the office, in the back of cars, and even in the bathroom of a club now.

You ignore these thoughts and grab the two bottles that Harry had gotten for you before finding the bedroom you’d be sleeping in. There was nothing more you wanted right now than to get under the blanket and sleep. Well, maybe you wanted this night to have never happened - then you would be able to sleep peacefully knowing your job wasn’t about to be done for.

The next morning you woke up to the sun shining in your eyes. The first thing that you notice as you sit up are how your clothes that you had left on the floor are now gone. Then your head begins to pound, letting out a deep breath you reach for the Gatorade. But sitting beside it is a note.

‘come into the office whenever you start feeling better- Harry’

You throw up in the shower. It’s not by any means your best moment, but it happens, and after getting nice and clean - in one of the greatest showers ever - you walk back out to the bedroom. Harry’s guest bedroom. Your bosses guest freaking bedroom. You shake your head at yourself and turn to see another note tapped to the closet door.

‘got you a few things to chose from - Harry’

He was buying you clothes after last night? You sigh and open the door to reveal the decent sized walk in, you couldn’t imagine what the master bedroom was like if this was only a guest bedroom. Inside you see a few items hung in the otherwise empty closet, as well as a pair of shoes sitting on the floor neatly.

There’s two dresses and a blouse and skirt hung up. All tags say Gucci on them, which honestly makes your head spin just thinking of how much they are worth but it could also be the killer hangover you were nursing while sipping on the Gatorade Harry had gotten for you last night. With little to no want to even be standing right now, you grab for the first hanger and put the simple cream colour dress with green and red stripes on. It zips completely up the front, from bottom to top. Suppose Harry would like the easy access of this dress, you think. Too bad he would no longer be your boss after the crap you put him through last night.

There’s no underwear, that should be noted, but you’re not really that surprised that Harry hadn’t gotten you any sort of under garments at all. He wasn’t a fan of underwear at all really. You decide to throw your hair up as it’s still a bit damp, then you find your purse and walk to the bedroom door. The heels click against the hardwood flooring while you walk to the large open concept living space of Harry’s home.

He’s not home, obviously, hence the first note you had read this morning. Going into the office so early on a Saturday only meant that things were just as busy as ever - business didn’t even stop for the holidays. You take another generous sip of the Gatorade and check your phone for the time.

Suppose it’s better to get this over with, you think. It was only 8 in the morning, only an hour later than when you’d typically head into work. You ignore the text messages from your friends, only making sure there wasn’t any new ones from Harry. There isn’t. You let out another sigh and head towards the elevator that’s inside Harry’s house. Because who doesn’t have a private elevator right? You take in the view one last time with a longing look - you wanted this view. You wanted this life. And yet you managed to fuck up your only passage into this lifestyle by drinking far too much tequila and fucking your boss. Your professors would be so proud.

“Miss,” you recognize Harry’s driver as you enter the lobby. He’s waiting for you it seems, standing from one of the couches as you walk towards him. “Mr Styles has told me to take you into work this morning,” he states.

“Well,” you pause, swallowing back the threat of vomiting for the third time this morning. “Let’s get going then,” you say with a tight smile.

You nearly fall asleep on the short ride to the Styles Enterprises building. Harry’s driver opens the door for you, which you simply give him a smile and short thank you in return. Maybe he’d like to give you a ride home to your crap apartment after, stop by a few cafes on the way home to find a new job too. You let out a sigh and ignore the rest of the people around the building that do recognize you.

This was by far one of the worst hangovers of your life, you think while finishing the rest of the Gatorade and tossing the bottle in the bin under your desk. Harry’s office door is closed. As it always is. Checking the calendar on your desk, you make sure he’s not in a meeting or on an important call. There’s nothing written down, so you drop your purse off and walk to the large doors.

“Come in,” Harry calls from inside after you knock.

He’s sitting at his desk, his back straight as a board as he types away whatever business stuff he had to attend to at this hour. God you were too hungover for this. You stop only a foot in front of his desk and wait for him to look up. It takes only a few breaths before Harry’s gaze falls to you. He lets his eyes draw up the length of you, from the black heels to the mess of hair upon your head. He probably notices the few small bruises at your knees from whatever you did last night. Or maybe he notices the small red marks at your neck. You remember what those are from, 100-percent, you’d never forget it.

“Did you not read my note?” Harry questions.

“Yeah, I did,” you nod, pausing to lick your lips, “just thought I’d get this whole losing my job thing over with,”

“Losing your job?” He raises a brow, pushing his chair back a bit from the desk. You raise your eyebrows as well, tilting your head at him.

“You really expect me to believe you’re not going to fire me after what happened last night?”

“You were enjoying a night out with friends, I admit I was being pushy with my text messages,” Harry says as he stands from his desk. You stay silent at his words. You rarely hear Harry ever admit he’s wrong. In fact you can’t think of a time, work related or not. It may also be because your brain’s working a bit slower this morning.

“You’re being serious?” You ask, “I’m not fired?”

You watch Harry’s every step as he makes his way around his desk and towards you. There’s not missing how your heart rate picks up again. Damn him, you think. He looked so good today in his grey suit and baby blue shirt. The top two buttons were undone which makes you think he must really be having a tough morning. You wonder how you can help.

“Miss, if you could get me another coffee, and make sure my next weekend is freed up,” Harry says.

“Of course,” you nod.

Harry reaches forward, the backs of his fingers gently touching the marks at your neck. You hold your breath. He blinks slowly, eyes still on them as he probably recalls last night in the bathroom. Then he’s reaching up to your hair, tugging at the elastic that was keeping it up. You reach up to help, letting your hair down.

“Maybe it’s best to keep your hair down, darling,” he says, a sly smile curling at his mouth.

“Right,” you breathe out.

Harry’s so close. So close that you can’t help but look down at his lips.

“Coffee, please,” he smiles.

You nod again and turn to walk out of his office. And maybe stop by the woman’s washroom to empty out your stomach yet again this morning. The mere thought of vomiting makes you feel even more sick.

“Y/N,” Harry calls. You turn back around, lifting your brows as you fear opening your mouth would resulting in vomit ending up on the floor of Harry’s office. “Make sure your calendar is clear for next weekend too, you’ll be joining me” he exclaims.

“Sorry?”

“Is there an issue?” Harry questions, his eyes barely raise from where they were looking down at some papers in his hands.

“It’s nothing, just had some plans-”

“Another night with tequila?”

“No-”

“Good, then cancel your plans. Or I’ll think about that whole you losing your job thing again,” Harry says. You can only nod before you turn away and walk out of his office.

These past 24 hours have been the wildest of your entire life, you’re sure of it. You try to forget about it all as you sit at your desk and begin to clear Harry’s schedule for the upcoming weekend. What for? Well that was the burning question now, seeing as you were to join him. You hoped it was to travel somewhere nice - you could enjoy Hawaii in December.

—

December 3rd 2021

You catch sight of Harry in the thinning crowd of the night. Though you hadn’t done much socializing after trying to cover yourself from the load of crap Harry started earlier in the night. While Harry had been buttering up anyone and everyone. You especially didn’t like the attention he was giving that blonde, her hair looked fake for Godsake.

“Lovely coat,” Harry says as he steps up in front of you.

“Oh shut it, before I kick you out of my club,” you spit back. All these drinks in your system meant you didn’t have the time to put up with him right now. Truthfully you just wanted Michael to get here and bring you home.

“Such a petty move, by the way, buying this bar,” he states, eyes wandering around the room.

“Thought that bar manager deserved his job back after your jealousy got him fired after all,” you ramble back at him, tightening your coat at your chest as the front doors open a few feet away from you. “Besides, you put it on the market, I just saw a good business opportunity,” you add.

“Questionable statements, all of them,” Harry says.

You don’t have a response. So instead you press your lips together tightly, eyeing Harry for the millionth time tonight. God you wanted nothing more than to hit him. Maybe you’d hire someone to do it. A few ideas came to mind as big bold letters reading ‘PAYBACK’ flashed through your head. You pull your mouth up to a smirk, crossing your arms at your chest now.

“I didn’t realize we were going to be playing these games so soon, Styles,” you say.

“Thought you knew the business by now, darling,” Harry’s smirk matches yours. It was like fighting fire with fire. And you loved it.

“Oh you taught me plenty about this side of the business, don’t you worry,” you say, taking one stop forward and bringing your fingers up to the collar of his white dress shirt. You smooth your fingers slowly over the material a few times. “I’ll play dirty,” you pause and lean towards him till your lips brush against his ear, “if that’s what you want,” you say.

You think for only a second that you’d stunned him to silence. But you never had the upper hand. A gasp pushes passed your lips as he places a hand at your lower back and presses you flesh against his front. Turning your head, you meet his gleaming eyes and devious smile.

“You’ve always know exactly how dirty I like it, darling,” he says.

He’s only close for a few seconds. As you’re too tipsy to push away immediately - or maybe too turned on. Either way, you give him a quick look before bringing your hands to his shoulders and pushing away from his hold. There’s no more words to be exchanged, you think as you walk to the front doors and find Michael standing there with the door open waiting for you. You don’t miss the questioning look in his eyes.

“Take me home, Michael,” you hiss at him.

Of course, you’re not angry at him. Oh no, it’s the mischievous green eyed bastard of a man that has managed to weasel his way back into your life - even after all the damage he’s done to you.

#wow #who else is shocked i actually posted this???#cause i sure am #harry styles imagine #harry styles concept #harry styles imagines #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles #harry styles x you #harry styles x reader #harry x you #harry styles smut #harry styles one s #harry styles writing #harry styles angst #ceo!harry

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andtheyweredeskmates · 4 years

Text

Of Latte’s and Lingerie- Chapter Four

So I ended up putting this on AO3 if anyone would rather read it there. I probably wont update this for at least a week because I live in Texas so my job opened back up plus I have finals till next Friday.

Links to the first 3 chapters: 1 2 3

Taglist: @catsssmeow

Adrien hated conflict. Like really hated conflict. Like the idea of conflict kinda made Adrien want to curl up in a ball and sleep until all conflicted parties were dead or unconflicted.

Unfortunately, Gabriel was privy to that. So while the deal he offered Adrien seemed stupidly unbalanced, it was kind of an act of genius. Adrien stared at his toes as he walked his way into Dunn’s. He really wanted to just shut his brain off. He didn’t really have to come to a decision immediately anyway. There was still time to enjoy his coffee and pretend like life was grand. Adrien was really good at enjoying coffee and pretending life was grand.

When Adrien got in line he shoved his hands in his back pockets and looked up at the sign, pretending he didn’t know what he wanted. But he always knew.

“Hey Tim,” Adrien said casually, walking up to the counter.

“Your large mocha frappe extra whip will be out in a minute.”

“It’s a little embarrassing how well you know me,” Adrien mumbled, getting out his wallet.

“Yeah I get that a lot,” Tim chuckled. Adrien paid for his coffee and started to walk to his corner. He stopped for a moment and gaped. It was taken. Adrien’s whole train of thought was derailed as he floundered, trying to think of a place to sit. He glanced nervously around to see that the coffee shop was completely full. Every table, chair and booth was occupied. His eyes lingered on Marinette in her usual spot and he felt the slightest bit of relief for the familiarity.

“Mocha Frappe for Adrien!”

Adrien walked hesitantly to the counter, still glancing around for a spot to open up. Maybe if he stared at someone long enough they’d get the mental message to leave.

“Your spots taken huh?” Adrien looked pathetically at Tim.

“You know, there’s a girl here that’s usually here when you are and she’s got plenty of room at her table. She’s really nice. You should ask to sit with her.” Adrien’s eyes got wide.

“Marinette?” Tim raised an eyebrow.

“Uh yeah, do you know her.”

“Not really. She’s… a work associate of my father.” Tim stared at Adrien for another moment before smirking.

“Well like I said, she’s really nice and she’s kind of having an existential crisis right now so I’m sure she’d love the company to keep her distracted.” Adrien glanced back over to see Marinette with her head in her hands. She left her hands slightly parted just enough to get the straw between them so that she could still easily sip her coffee without moving. Adrien smiled softly.

“Yeah, okay!” He took his coffee in hand and made his way over to the booth.

…

“Hey!”

Marinette was so startled she nearly spilled her coffee in her lap.

“Ohmigosh,” she stuttered. She looked up to see the hot blonde boy who usually sat in the corner booth.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you!” Marinette was frozen for just a fraction of a second, eyes wide and mouth open in a look of terror. Once she realized how stupid she probably looked, she immediately attempted to compose herself.

“Oh no! I just wasn’t paying attention! Um whats up?” She spoke quickly and she stumbled a little over her words. God he was freaking hot.

“Well, my usual spot kinda got taken and there’s no more tables left. I see you here a lot so I was wondering if maybe today I could sit here with you.” This could not be happening. Marinette had a slight inclination to burst out the door and never come back. But this also had the potential to be the best day of her life. Maybe this would be the story she would tell her kids when she explained how she met their father. She’d totally have his babies. He was so hot….

“I can sit outside if you don’t want company.” Marinette immediately realized she’d been staring silently for far too long.

“NO!” Adrien jumped a little at her squeak.

“I mean, no I’d love the company, um I just didn’t realize you’d noticed me here. I mean I’ve noticed you but you’re gorgeous… I mean- Your clothes are gorgeous! Um they’re Gabriel right?” Marinette rolled her eyes in her thoughts. Real smooth. The hot boy blushed a little and scratched his head.

“Uh yeah I wear a lot of his stuff.”

“Wow, I love his designs. They’re so beautiful. I’m hoping that maybe one day I could work for him. I’m a fashion designer.” Marinette was ready to die. And she would have if she hadn’t kept imagining “Marinette, beloved idiot” on her headstone. She had no idea how to talk to men.

The hot boy sat down across from her and smiled.

“I know! My father is in the business and he speaks very highly of your work!” Marinette could feel her cheeks heating up.

“Um, oh you’ve heard of me?”

“Yeah! You’re Marinette Dupain-Cheng. I thought about talking to you a few times but you’ve always seemed really busy.”

“Oh yeah… Um this is kind of like my workspace away from work.” The hot boy grinned widely.

“I love this place! I won’t even tell my friends about this place because I’m scared it’ll get to popular.” Marinette chuckled.

“I know what you mean. My best friend is a reporter so I tell her I go to Starbucks so she doesn’t expose my secret lair.” Marinette let herself relax for a bit. She found conversation really easy with the hot boy. He was good making small talk and Marinette just kind of felt her worries trickle away. Briefly.

“So what are you working on right now?” Marinette clammed up almost immediately.

“Oh, um nothing important. It’s kind of lame, I um I don’t really want to talk about it. I’ll probably bore you to death.” And just like that Marinette was mentally kicking herself again. If he had asked her 24 hours earlier about her project she would probably have talked his ear off. She was extremely proud of her line and she was equally proud to be submitting it to Gabriel Agreste.

But here, in the present, the idea of her project made her nauseous.

“Well I heard that you’re working on a line for Gabriel Agreste.” Marinette prayed briefly to god and thanked him that she hadn’t had been sipping on her coffee when he said that.

“What!? Where did you hear that?” Marinette couldn’t look in a mirror but if she could’ve she would’ve see a jittery, crimson frinese (an inside joke between her and Alya) woman, fidgeting frantically with the collar of her blouse. And if she had looked in this mirror, not knowing that it was her, she would’ve laughed hysterically at the poor sap.

The hot boy however, was much nicer and much worse at reading social cues than Marinette.

“Oh you know, I have connections. I was actually considering attending the show your line’s gonna be featured in.” And if Marinette had an ounce of sanity left, it evaporated with that sentence.

“Oh.” Was all she could manage.

“I bet its gonna be great. I’ve heard really good things about your work.” If Marinette’s sanity hadn’t evaporated, she probably would’ve been very flattered.

“I guess you’ll have to wait and see,” she said flatly. She was staring off into space with a dead look in her eyes. If the hot blonde boy saw her in any of the pieces she’d designed, she’d die for real.

“I guess I will! I got to get going but do you think I could come sit with you again another time?” Marinette suddenly looked at Adrien who looked very hopeful and a little embarrassed.

“Of course!” she responded. “Anytime!” The hot blonde boy grinned.

“Awesome, see ya Marinette!” He got up and walked away, giving Marinette a brief wave.

“Yeah! See ya!” The conflicting emotions in Marinette were so intense she nearly crushed the coffee cup in her hand. On the one hand, she was still freaking out about work and the hot boy was doing absolutely nothing to make her feel better. On the other hand, Marinette was also kind of freaking out because she was excited that the hoy boy wanted to hang out with her again even after she acted like a complete jackass in front of him. Marinette pulled out her phone, shaking a little (from caffeine or anxiety, who could say?) as she typed.

To: Alya

I need you to come over tonight. Bring wine. Coffee is not strong enough.

…

Making new friends always put Adrien in a better mood. He was glad he went to Dunn’s. That place was literally the best place on earth. It made him feel infinitely better no matter what was going on. Adrien thought about Marinette. She was funny and a little awkward but Adrien liked that. He got over the confident, sexy façade in his previous line of work very quickly. Not that there was anything wrong with confidence but he hated that every woman he seemed to come in contact with tried to give off the same old, “I’m gonna break your heart and you’re gonna like it” vibe.

Adrien sighed. He was thinking about his fathers offer again. He supposed he could handle events a lot easier with a friend. Maybe they could go together. He figured Marinette would be up front and center for the upcoming show. It wouldn’t be far fetched to say they could sit together. Although he supposed he’d have to fess up to who his father really was. He scrunched his nose a little at the idea. He liked that she didn’t know. It made their friendship feel more real. But maybe he was getting ahead of himself.

He couldn’t exactly call 20 minutes of conversation over coffee friendship. Could he? He was reminded for a moment of how he became friends with Chloe.

“Is your name Adrien?”

“Yeah.”

“You’re going to be my friend.”

Maybe Adrien could be adventurous. Just proclaim that Marinette was his friend now. He chuckled a little at the idea. He regretted for a moment not asking for her number. At least then he wouldn’t have to wait for a happenstance meeting with his friend. But thinking on it, he couldn’t remember a single time he’d gone to Dunn’s after 5:00 pm and not seen her there. Jeez maybe it really was her work away from work.

Adrien let his mind wander as he drove back home. But the soft smile never left his lips. He just couldn’t stop thinking about her. Marinette. His new friend.

Next Chapter

SPOILER FOR NEXT CHAPTER:

“MARI WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN YOU DON’T KNOW HIS NAME!”

#mlb #my fic #adrinette #coffee shop au #miraculous ladybug #miraculous fanfic #crack fic #marinette dupain cheng #adrien agreste #adrienette

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ahollandy · 7 years

Text

Miserable Goodbyes Pt. II

Based on the song ‘Miserable at Best’ with a bit of a twist? Following up on Part 1 of ‘Miserable Goodbyes’. Please let me know what you think <3

Paring: Tom Holland x Reader

Warnings: Angst, mentions of sex, possibly poorly written fic.

It had been weeks since your last encounter with Tom. You hadn’t heard anything from him since that evening when you saw him leave through your door.

No texts, no posts, not even any instagram updates since then.

It didn’t go unnoticed by his fans. His sudden absence was an obvious clue that something had happened, but you did your best to stay out of the drama that was evolving around it online.

Your closest friends knew what had happened, but they promised to keep it under wraps until you deemed it necessary to tell other people.

It was a Friday night now, and you spent it sitting on your couch with a random Netflix series running in the background. You sat on your phone, scrolling through timelines of different apps, mindlessly reading tweets and posts about everything and nothing.

Little did you know that Tom was doing the same thing, but instead he was scrolling through your old posts.

He sat in the darkness of his room, thumb sliding down the history of your posts. Photos of the two of you together flooded his screen and he couldn’t help but feel the ache in his chest.

God he missed you.

He chuckled to himself when he came across the photo of the two of you, a selfie, with cake batter and cream all over your face. A food fight had broken out in an attempt to make a cake when Tom kept dipping his finger in the mix and eating it.

The photo brought back a flood of memories, like how the two of you then decided to give up on cooking the cake and ate the sweet mixture together on the couch.

The same couch you were sitting on right now.

Tom thought about you a lot, and he thought about what you were doing right now.

He pictured you curled up in your favorite knitted sweater, legs tucked up to your chest as the glow of your phone screen danced on your skin.

It was funny how accurate he was at that moment, he knew you so well.

Tom put his phone down and pinched the bridge of his nose. He felt the scar over his skin, remembering the countless amounts of times he had broken it on set.

He couldn’t help but think back to the time he broke his nose in front of you, trying to do a back flip while a little drunk.

You patched him back up, cleaned the blood and helped him get to the hospital to ensure everything was okay. You stayed with him that night to make sure that he slept well, and that the concussion wouldn’t make things worse. The idea of having you around made his insides both warm and cold as he thought about how he left you.

He started to remember how you looked in his bed. The way your face fell as you slept, how your hair was always a mess but was so soft around your face.

It pained him to think about how you slept alone now, cold under the blankets without him to cuddle up to your side. He hated the fact he went to sleep with an empty bed too. He missed the way you spoke gently in your sleep, murmuring sweet nothings under your breath as your dreams danced behind your eyelids.

He missed the way he could soothe you after waking form a nightmare. He would hold your head close to his chest, so you could hear his heartbeat, comforted by the sound and the feel of his chest rising and falling with each of his breaths.

He started to remember the way you kissed him, how soft your lips were, and how your fingers would tangle into his hair and tug at the roots. How your hands would wander down his body and graze over his chest, down to his stomach.

He let him mind cast back over the first time he slept with you, reminiscing about the shape of your body moved in sync with his, the sounds he elicited from you, the feeling of your skin on him.

Tom tried to push aside the feelings that were resurfacing, trying to convince himself that he did the right thing.

But deep down, he knew he didn’t.

He knew he had fucked up what would have been the best thing to happen to him.

He knew that you wouldn’t have left him like the others did, wouldn’t have left him in a sobbing mess, not like how he had left you.

That’s when it hit him. He did to you, what he was trying to avoid happening to him.

In that moment, he felt a flood of guilt, selfishness and pain. His chest tightened and his head hurt. He didn’t know how to make it right at this point.

He knew if he sent a text message, it would be ignored, that goes for phone call or face time. He knew those wouldn’t work, so he gathered his things and headed out for your door.

The cheesy sitcom continued to roll on your TV, but you barely were paying any attention. Your mind was elsewhere, but was suddenly yanked back to reality when the sound of a knock on the door fell through the room.

You frowned to yourself as you waltzed towards the door, confusion clouding your mind as to who could be on the other side.

Your body was frozen stiff with the numbness that washed over you as your eyes fell onto the face of the familiar brown curls framing the warm chocolate brown eyes you had gotten to know so well.

“What are you doing here?” you manage to stammer out, sounding half confident as you tried to regain the feeling in your legs.

“I had to come see you,” he said.

There was silence shared between the two of you for a few seconds, before you turned and walked further into the room. Tom took this as an invitation to follow you, closing the door behind you.

You heard the door click as it shut, and turned to look at him.

“We need to talk”

“Yeah, I’ve heard that before”.

“I miss you”

“Please don’t do this to me”

“I can’t-“

“Tom” you interrupted. He stared at you with sad eyes.

“You broke me,” you continue. You watched as he visibly sunk onto himself. His shoulders slumped and his head hanging in shame.

“I don’t know how to make this right” he said, whispering. He sounded fragile, weak, and scared. Scared of how this is happening. Scared of what other pain he might cause you.

Both of your heads snapped to watch the TV, an eruption of cheers and whistles came from the speakers as two of the characters embraced in a loving kiss.

You both sighed simultaneously.

Your arms crossed over your chest as a hand ran nervously up and down your arm. Avoiding his eye contact, you walked towards the kitchen, getting a glass of water just for an excuse to have your back to him.

You didn’t want him to see how broken you really were. How your smile had changed, how your laugh wasn’t the same, how the sparkle in your eye didn’t shine when you looked at him. You could even hear the difference in your own voice now, and you hated that it was because of him.

Tom called your name from behind, and you winced at the sound and how effortlessly it rolled off his tongue.

“I want to try this again,” he said.

To that, you turned and faced him, and for once he could see the pain in your eyes. You stared at him, not quite sure if you heard him right.

“You can’t be serious” you scoffed.

“I’ve never been more serious. I didn’t realize how big of a part of my life you were”. He paused and looked at you with sad eyes. “You were my best friend”.

“I know” you retort, looking away from him again.

“And I fucked up.”

“You can say that again,” you murmur under your breath, knowing all too well Tom heard you.

“I want to make it up to you” he said barely above a whisper.

“And how would that go, Tom? We become friends again, great. We get close again, great. And then we start this whole thing all over again” you reply.

“It wont be like that” he tries to reason.

“Sure it won’t, just like last time how it wasn’t going to be like that”.

He looked hurt, and you felt a little bad, because it seemed like he was trying. But your mind kept wandering back to that day the other week when his words struck you down and broke your heart.

You heard your name called, drawing your attention back to Tom.

“I know I don’t deserve your trust, and I may never get it back. But without having you in my life has made me realize that you were the best thing that has ever happened to me”.

Your eyes meet his and you can hear the truth in his tone.

“Every day I would wake up and look forward to seeing you. Everywhere I looked I would see something that would remind me of you. Every time something exciting happened all I wanted to do was rush home and tell you about it. I miss having you in my life.”

It took a second for the words to sink in. You turned to take a seat on your nearby couch in the centre of the room, staring off into the distance.

“Without you…” he continued, “I’ll be miserable at best.”

Tom was worried. He could feel his hands start to sweat and a heat rushing to his face. He didn’t even know what he was doing here, or what he was trying to say.

He walked over to you, reluctantly placing his hand on your shoulder. The sudden touch made you jump a little, but as you met his gaze his face was riddled with worry. You could see the sincerity behind his words, the way he looked hurt by what he did to you.

“What do we do form here?” you ask.

Tom frowns at you. “What d’you mean?”

“If we’re going to turn this around, where do we even start?”

Tom’s eyes grew in realization.

“You mean…”

“I mean I want you in my life too, Tom.��

Tom sat next to you and gently put his hand on your thigh, thumb stroking lightly on your skin.

“I’m sorry for what I did, I promise I wont make the same mistake again.”

“You better not” you say with a chuckle.

“No way am I stupid enough to make the same mistake twice.”

He couldn’t contain his smile, radiating warmth to your core. You started to feel butterflies in your stomach, like you had when you first started to get to know him, and it felt like you were finally coming home.

Tag list: (i’m sorry if you didn’t want to be tagged but I went through the comments of the first one) @riverdalemami, @tomrannosaurusholland, @marveltomjunkie, @casualprincess77, @aussie-mantle, @ownri, @princehollandcharming

#tom holland #Tom holland imagine #tom holland x reader imagine #Tom x reader #tom holland x reader #tom holland writing #tom holland writings #tom holland x you #tom holland x you imagine #tom holland fic #tom holland fan fic #tom holland fan fiction #tom holland fanfic #tom holland fanfiction

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modiintrainguy · 4 years

Text

Is it ADHD. What is it ADHD? What is this. What?

August 3 2020

It’s been a while as the cliché says.

I guess I’ve avoided and my heads been a whoosh and ive not been able to focus or /and I’ve felt like ive not had the time even though I obviously don’t spend all my time doing what I should be doing and not relaxing or taking time out.

Also. I’ve almost not taken the train at all since January. The train was my writing space. It used to be the place. But now im on the bus. And then of course there was lockdown for 2 months when I didn’t even go to work. And now I only go twice a week.

Let’s do some subheaders. Its 8.35 am im on the bus. Ive got about 25 minutes.

1. ADHD Coaching

So yeah ive been meaning to write a short summary each week. Then I don’t.

So lets see what I can remember from my zoom with the coach on Wednesday. It was tishabav and I thought I was fasting. I mean I was fasting and then I ate before I went to bed for obvious reasons. And then I didn’t on Thursday morning.

But what did we talk about and what conclusions did we come to?

God I need to get the notes from him. He writes down everything I say. I need to review it regularly.

So.

Er, ah yeah. I went through a list of things I sent on wasup.

a. My confusion about decision making that Friday morning when the day before I had arranged that A should bring R round to play with the girls but then thelittlun woke up at 7.30 and said she wanted to go to the beach and I was like great I’ll tell A. I knew she might not want to or be able to go cos she would need to be home by 12pm but I texted her anyway and I felt elated about going to the beach. But then she called and said she cant go to the beach and R will be very disappointed. And I got so confused and in the end I went.

And we talked about how I just looked at the negative from the decision. That I saw it was bad to go but bad to stay and go to ben shemen. But I need to be rational and realise no choice will be perfect. There will be bad and good in every choice. So u just need to decide. One or the other and accept that there are negative things in both but it doesn’t mean the other choice was right.

I had a similar feeling on Thursday when I picked up the girls from C and I had agreed to go to the center of town with A and her girls but I was “Fasting” and impulsively didn’t want o go. and then R said she wants to come to our house and the littlun wanted her to come and then I invited R and S and M and A and then I was stuck. And A came late to pick R up from C, like 10 minutes, and it was a stress. I was like come over and then inevitably I spent the journey home thinking I made a mistake and I shouldn’t have forced R to come over and I needed the space and fresh air after being at home all day. And then and then and then it was fine and R appreciated it.

Can I do it? Can I calm and see the trees from the wood?

Other things discussed:

b. The argument/discussion with thewife about what to do on the Thursday of tishabav – should the girls go to C? or come to the hospital with us. In the end we got to the right decision.

2. Work

Really really whats the stress all about. I was watching the beginning of a movie just last night with a scene showing a guy coming to work in the morning. He seemed fresh and when I was driving home I was thinking I wake up stressed.

Like there is no - this is today, im gonna try and achieve a, b and c. and then im finished. Its always like a rush to do as much on the long list as I can and then the feeling like I didn’t complete what I should and then im worried that Im late and I cant relax in the evening and then in the morning I need to get in as early as possible cos im behind.

I need realistic understanding of what I should do and when I should do it.

After my weekly with Eyal I didn’t get close to that cos I just list X, Y, X, A, B C and im left with an unrealistic list and then its like I need to try and do as much as I can but then it means I wont finish it so there will also be things I need to and should do that are still on the list and I never feel like I can relax cos im always behind.

So whats the answer. Realistic daily planning in the morning.

Can I do it? The reason I don’t is cos the planning seems to end up taking up too much time. Can I do it quickly? Can I write this blog quickly

Not really. But its essential.

3. Life

That’s the connection with the life. Like why don’t I get on top of the money? Cos it feels like it will take too long to organise?

That’s more of a part than I realise. A bigger part.

If I could relax and know I have time to do the washing up then it would be mindful like mrs says it is.

4. Work-life-balancelife

Whereive I am Im always in a rush, worried all the time when ive realised ive been doing the wrong thing the whole time so ive been wasting time and now I wont be able to get things done.

I know I cant do everything. Need to plan things.

Problem is I review the plans and realsie I didn’t get it right. And the planning takes so long and then im in a mess anyway.

Thing is I went swimming on shabat and I took 24 minutes or so to do lengths and it took me back to the SBTc times when I spent an hour swimming trying to work out how to do what needed to be done. Ive been in the same trying to work it out situation ever since apart from that break between Cr and this job.

But then did it matter? I left and I realised I was focused on some wrong things.

I need to focs on the things that need to be done.

If there are too manythen I cant do them all.

Focs sake.

5. ADHD drugs?

Get an assessment? ADHD centre in tel aviv? NShg? Fuck knows.

I guess Tuesday I make an appointment with someone.

Cos I need an assessment.

Although there is the question – if there is no physical biological evidence that shows ADHD isn’t all just a guess. So the test is do you act like X or Y. but theres no way of proving the reason you act like that is cos the way your brain is wired. Its just an assumption and a guess.

Is it true? Can it help. Will an assessment give me peace of mind. At least I can tell people I “have ADHD” – but what does it mean? What Coach says it doesn’t matter about an assessment – the fact is my brain works in a certain way. Why is interesting and can help change it or help me learn how to deal with it but really its about accepting this is how my brain works and developing ways to deal with the situations like

- Stopping me being impulsive and just doing or saying things without thinking them through (that’s hard eh)

- Trying to look at things from different perspective

Just remembered the littleuns insight when I thought this guy had bumped into me on purpose outside littlerones gan and littlun was like maybe he didn’t see you.

And today when she said I shouldn’t throw things cos someone could slip on her magnet and I could have broken something when I threw the sandals. She was right so does that mean I sohuldnt have done it. Yes. Obviously. But its so recent I can feel how I felt and it feels like the only thing to do.

So maybe nows the time to analyse that situation – when I feel the tension and urge to throw. Could I have sotpped myself. Only reason I think no is cos I didn’t have time. And I felt it was the only way to show I cant deal with the sandals. I wanted to shock littlerun into stoppeding crying. And she did but then I felt worse and had to spend a minute apologising to littlun.

So whats the answer – theres almost always a spare minute or two to calm down. Almost always.

This doesn’t mean I have 5 or 10 mins or half an hour and hour. Although maybe I do.

But don’t spend hours on the wrong thing – focus on the right thing, get it done and then bish bash bosh. Move on. Be realistic about what needs to be done, do it as quickly as possible and then I can go home and go running tonight.

Yknow dat.

Gotta try and run with headie one even if he may be an anti-Semite.

Gonna get there at 9.10. leaving at 6.20.

Zehu.

UPDATE - 6.13pm

After an entire day, and maybe a week, of avoiding the relatively simple task of writing down exactly what is going to be on each of the sites in August I took the plunge about half an hour ago and started doing fbcom and lo and behold it wasn’t just easy it felt great getting clarity.

just goes to show eh. what i know is true really is true. it’s not a big deal. calm down, get the easy stuff out the way and then concentrate on the slightly more complicated but also easy and more enjoyable part which is the planning and editing and doing what the hell i want with these sites!!

is that the truth? maybe. gotta get the bus though.

1 note · View note

glowstickhaloboy · 6 years

Text

klance roommates au

usual disclaimer: its long as hell

keith is the newly hired, up-and-coming sales rep of his office job. hes fresh out of college, determined, and as awkward as he is in real life, he knows how to make a sale because its all scripted. his boss, doris, a wrinkly old lady who brings in cookies for the office at the end of every month, adores this strapping young man with a real work ethic.

his brother, shiro, is an ethics professor at the local university, Bullshit University (BU). while shiro is glad that keith is doing really well in life for this age, he has this annoying habit of constantly asking keith if hes alright, or if he needs anything, or if theres anything he feels like he wants to do to make himself better. keith always says no.

BU has a bs program called Apprenticeship, wherein a student will be mentored/sponsored by a professor, and the ethics department is head of the program, so shiro also hand picks his own apprentice and its a Big Deal and there are so many kids who apply for it not only because professor shirogane is hot as balls, but because this program gives out credits like candy. this semester’s lucky apprentice is none other than lance mcclain.

lance, if you ask him, will say that this all went completely according to plan and he never once doubted that shiro would pick him. on the inside, he is in an eternal state of wtf wtf wtf wtf how did i do this??!?!?!!!

keith knows that this is something shiro does because shiro likes to update keith on his life, so he’ll call and they’ll chat for a while and usually there will be some mention of an apprentice and whats going on with their studies. as the school year comes to an end, keith obligingly asks shiro who his chosen apprentice is for the upcoming year.

the line goes quiet.

“shiro? did i lose you?”

“no, im still here.”

more silence.

keith says, “what is it.”

“i have a small favor to ask of you.”

lance, if you asked him, would say that his interview with shiro went very well. he would say that he had shiro eating out of the palm of his hand. in reality, there was a lot more crying about money and family matters and anxiety for the future, and when shiro offered lance a tissue lance mistakenly grabbed shiro’s tie and blew his nose into it. two weeks later, he was asked to submit a final letter of intent, which he almost didn’t do because he was too embarrassed, then stayed up all night before the deadline because he couldnt not take a shot at it.

the problem with an apprenticeship position was that it was not like a residency staff position, wherein lance could live on campus without being charged a room & board fee, and he could not be both a part of residency staff and an apprentice. (the residency staff made his decision easy by rejecting his application, but still, it was a bummer.) that being said, lance had absolutely no money to stay on campus next year, and he could not commute because he lived four hours away from the school.

keiths apartment, shiro had not failed to notice, was a convenient 32 and a half minutes from the campus.

“you want me to what?” keith asks shiro, paling, staring into his categorized fridge. he knows where everything is. he decides where everything is. he is not sharing his living space with some kid.

“hes not some kid,” says shiro. “hes 20 years old and he needs this. i really want to make this opportunity work for him, but the school wont let him stay with me. please, keith. i think this would be good for both of you.”

“what is that supposed to mean?”

“can you honestly tell me that you arent lonely all by yourself?”

“no, im not. im comfortable and in control of my own life. i dont want one of your projects from the projects ruining everything ive worked to get, and i think its bull-headed of you to assume that you know whats best for me, like you always try to do, and i think its rude of you to invite someone to live in my apartment.”

“he likes mus-”

keith hangs up on shiro mid-word, fumes for a few hours as he gets some work done and eats dinner, then goes to sleep.

the next day, keith feels guilty, sure, but he stands by what he said. shiro would call him in a few days and initiate the apology, and they would both put it behind them without mentioning it again. until then, he would throw himself into his work and pretend that everything was fine.

at 6pm, doris knocks on the side of his cubicle, smiling down on him in all her wrinkly glory. shes 60 going on 80 with graying hair and a cozy southern drawl. “darling, why are you still sitting at that desk? its a friday night. youre young, youre cute, you must have a sweetheart you wanna spend it with, or some friends at least.”

keith smiles politely. “thats alright, doris. id rather work, honestly.”

“you sure, honey? i admire a good worker, but if youre working good for the wrong reasons, thats nothing to be proud of. dont you have a nice girl to go home to?”

keith isnt even going to touch the last part of that statement because he doesnt know doris’s political views and doesnt have the time nor patience for a lecture from her in case her warm hospitality is all a condition of keiths being a Model Young Man. he grimaces and says, “no, i dont. and if i did have someone to go home to, it wouldnt be the start of a night going out on the town, it would be someone to have a relaxing night in with.”

“that sounds nice,” says doris, with a minor suggestion behind it that keith should get his coat and get the hell out of here.

“but id really prefer to work,” insists keith. doris clicks her tongue and tells him to suit himself.

meanwhile, lance is panicking. here he has this amazing opportunity, and no way to make it happen. hunk, allura, and pidge all live on campus, apartments nearby are way too expensive, and nobody on the forums is responding to his roommate pleas. he has made it clear that he will take literally anything, and still, no bites.

“im sorry,” shiro says at the start of their meeting. “i tried to set something up, but it fell through. there are a couple of scholarships you can try applying for, but their awards arent given out until december, so youd have to find a way to make ends meet until then.”

“and i cant be a part time student working,” says lance, “because part time students arent eligible for the internship.”

shiro sighs grimly. “thats right.” for a moment, he does nothing but frown at the wall, and lance has nothing to say so he doesnt interrupt. slowly, without explanation, shiro picks up his desk phone and dials. after a moment of patience, he sets it back down and pinches the bridge of his nose. “i want to figure something out for you, lance. do you have any ideas?”

lance shakes his head, shrugging. “i asked a couple of my friends to get an apartment with me, but two of them are residency staff, and the other one takes too many classes a semester to be able to work enough to afford an apartment.

shiro is about to say something, but the phone rings. he snatches it up. “keith? i thought you were ignoring me. oh. no, thats not it. actually, um, i have him sitting in my office with me. i was hoping you had reconsidered.” there was a very long pause. “i understand that,” says shiro. lance’s organs are all mixed up. his heart is beating in his throat and his stomach is somewhere near his feet. “i understand that,” he says again. “im sorry for what i said. you know i didnt mean it that way. i worry about you, thats all, because im a worrier. im not trying to influence your life at all, i really am just asking for a favor. ive exhausted all my other options. keith, youre all ive got.”

he covers the speaker with his mouth and looks at lance. “are you comfortable talking to him?”

lance balks. “who is it?”

“my brother, keith, the person im trying to get to let you stay with him. he wants to talk to you.”

lance holds his hand out for the phone, and shiro passes it over. lance says, “hello?”

“give me one reason why i should let you stay with me,” says a voice that is not exactly what lance is expecting, but still intimidating. “its not a trick question or a test, but it is pass-fail.”

lance’s mouth is so dry, he isnt sure he’ll be able to speak. “i,” he starts, then decides that he cant, then realizes that he has to. “i dont know what im doing. everyones trying to tell me what i should do, or what i have to do, but your brother--um, professor shirogane--is the only person whos asking me what i want to do. that means a lot to me, and so does the fact that he chose me to be his apprentice. so i want to give this my honest to god best shot to repay him, and because i need to know for myself what im capable of. so, um, sir, if you can give me my foot in the door, i promise i would be grateful for that, and if it doesnt work out, then you can kick me out, and i’ll still be grateful that you gave me the chance. um, thanks for giving me the chance to talk.”

there was a long beat of silence. shiro’s mouth was covered with his hand, so lance couldnt tell if he was smiling, but his eyes were definitely shining.

keith said, “shiro always does make people want to be the best version of themselves. dont tell him i said that. put him back on the line.”

lance shakily handed the phone back. shiro put it to his ear. “keith? uh huh.” he chuckled. “i know.” he closed his eyes, the tension seeping out of his shoulders, and lance couldnt help but feel his hopes soar. “thank you, keith. i promise i’ll pay you back for this, and you wont regret it.” he hangs up. “lance, you have a place to live next year.”

come the end of august, keiths career is running itself. he clears out the storage room in preparation for a temporary guest with the help of shiro, whose job it is not only to set up the room, but to pay lance’s half of the rent if lance should default.

two days after the bed and desk are built, lance mcclain moves in. hes weighed down by bags when keith answers the door, looking boyish and disheveled. “whoa,” he says, and stumbles back, almost loses his balance, then manages to catch himself.

keith prickles. “what?”

lance’s eyes swoop up and down keith a clean once.

“youre shiro’s younger brother,” he says, blinking in surprise. “i didnt expect you to be so... you sounded older and mea-- um, on the phone. i thought i was going to be living with a forty year old dude or something, but you’re. um. hi, im lance mcclain.”

he sticks out his hand, strapped down by bags. keith shakes it.

“keith kogane. your room is down the hall and to the left. the bathroom is the first one on the right. my bedroom is the door at the end of the hall, the one thats always shut.”

lance nods. “right,” he says, sounding choked. “i’ll just put this stuff away then...”

he gets inside his room and calls hunk, freaking out about how the guy he has to live with is a lunatic and might also be a serial killer. how else did one explain his bathroom being so freakishly clean? hunk tells lance to calm down and that its just first-day jitters. everything will feel normal once lance gets the routine down.

but lance does not get the routine down. if keith isnt telling lance not to move the milk in the fridge (lance needed somewhere for his blueberries), then he was shouting through the bathroom door to shut up (lance sang in the shower! big deal!). lance was positive that keith hated him, which, between getting his ass kicked at school and feeling like a burden at the apartment, made for a hellish first month on lance’s part. he and keith never talked to each other, because keith was always leaving for work in the mornings before lance woke up, and lance would get back sometimes at 9pm or later, when keith was already showering and getting ready for bed. on weekends, lance booked it out of there to hang out with hunk and pidge, but keith was usually still awake when lance got back, either reading or watching something on TV.

the best way to describe the tension was frigid. keith didnt acknowledge lance so long as lance kept to himself. and the biggest mistake lance made was to break that tension while keith was home.

of course, lance didnt know at the time. he was pretty sure that keith was out, but too scared to check because the door at the end of the hall was daunting, and lance was pretty sure that keith was the only one who could pass through it without damaging his soul permanently.

lance had assignments, okay? he was a music major. that involved some instruments being played from time to time. usually, he was able to work around keith’s schedule, or quiet enough that he could do it when keith was sleeping, but when he wasnt worried about it, he wasnt worried about it. which led to a high pitched scream from a certain college student as keith banged on his bedroom door.

collecting himself, lance went to open it. “sorry, i-”

“what the hell are you doing?”

lance sighed. “look, keith, im grateful that youre letting me live here, but that means letting me live here. i have assignments, and music relaxes me. so if i can put up with your alphabetical cereal boxes, i think its fair that you let me get some work done.”

“im trying to get my work done.”

“youre not even at work!”

keith pinched the bridge of his nose, a very shiro thing to do. “i dont have a problem with the music,” he said at last. “but we better not get any noise complaints from the neighbors.”

lance saluted him and shut the door, breathing a sigh of relief.

after that, tension melted a little more every day. lance’s outburst seemed to have triggered a chain reaction wherein keith and lance actually learned how to live with each other. after respectfully asking lance to remember to take his beauty products out of the bathroom when finished with them, he realized that what lance really needed was his own shelf, so he adjusted. when lance left on saturday mornings and saw keith taking his usual post at the coffee table with his stack of files, lance would ask if keith wanted anything from mcdonalds before coming home. slowly, surely, they became roommates.

until one day lance came home and saw keith watching his favorite show. it was a tidal wave of loud that keith had never had to experience before. youre only on the first season okay scoot over can i put my feet up im going to who do you like best so far what do you think of the villain isnt the actor who plays jack so hot-

they both freeze a little, lances face going red. “um,” he said. “its not like im going to be bringing any guys home, so we dont have to-”

“im gay,” keith says bluntly, because it looks like lance is about to have a heart attack. he feels a little like doris in that moment, although he doesnt know why. “yeah, hes hot.”

lance melts into the couch. “that makes that easy then,” he says. “that makes this the gay-partment. actually, we cant call it that, because im bi for real, and gay-partment doesnt sound good anyway, but you get what im-”

“i get it,” says keith, a mercy killing. he presses play with finality.

shiro checks up on keith frequently enough, but he never asks about lance any more than “is everything okay between you guys?” keith suspects that shiro does not want to push, and is waiting for keith to be the person who actually brings it up.

keith doesnt. even when he waits for lance to get home from classes so they can watch an episode together before keith goes to bed (because the last time keith watched it without him lance threw a fit), or when lance’s awful car craps out on him so they have to share for a week while the mechanic handles it, which involves a lot of carpooling and, as lance calls them “jam sessions” where he blares his horrible music and sings along (but isnt actually so bad because sometimes he improvises lines to the songs and he can be funny when he wants to be).

keith realizes over the six days that lance is gone for thanksgiving break, not even a full week, that the apartment feels too quiet without him, and at the ripe old age of 23, he might have found his first genuine friend.

after thanksgiving, the barrier melts more. keith is cool with lance having friends over as long as he gets a heads up, and lance invites keith to his occasional open mic night performances at BU.

one day, lance comes home and sees keith hunched over some files on the kitchen table, tie loose on his neck, a half-finished bowl of leftover pasta abandoned near him. lance realizes that he has no idea what keiths job is.

“sales,” keith informs him. “i convince people that they need to buy eco-friendly plastic cups in bulk for their business or school.”

“sounds boring.”

“its not.”

“do you supply cups to my school?”

“theyre not one of my clients, no.”

“if you cant sell cups to your own brother’s school, how good of a salesman can you be?”

keith rolls his eyes and--hey, finally--looks up. “im the best in the department,” he says. “because i take my job seriously, lance. as seriously as you take your apprenticeship to shiro, which is the only reason i agreed to let you stay here.”

“wow,” says lance. “thats harsh. all work and no play makes keith revert back to his old angry self, i see.” he leaves. keith sighs, decides he can no longer focus, and packs up his files. he cleans up his wasted dinner and knocks on lance’s door. lance doesnt answer, so keith persists. when hes ignored again, he grits his teeth and says, “oh, real mature.”

he turns to go back to the living room and sees the bathroom door open. lance steps out, shirtless. “who are you talking to?” he asks, shirtless. he scratches the back of his head, shirtless.

“are you hungry?” asks keith. “i was thinking we could order a pizza and watch an episode or two.”

lance considers keith for a moment, shirtless, then rolls his eyes, still shirtless. “if thats the best you can do for apologies, mullet, then you have a lot to learn. i was going to take a shower.” he reaches around keith, shirtless, and pulls a towel off the inside of his bedroom wall. “call and order, i’ll be fast.” before he shuts the bathroom door again, he says, “i don’t are what else is on it as long as there are green peppers.” and then he’s gone, shirtless.

keith wakes up and wonders why he blacked out for a second.

the pizza arrives, and lance gets out of the shower, clothed, and one or two episodes become six or seven, with keith continuously having to pause because lance is talking and getting carried away because hes getting so excited. its thursday and keith has work tomorrow, he knows, and yet hes denying it. his stomach is full of warm pizza and lance has just stopped talking about the way it rained when they filmed this scene, but keith hasnt reached over to his play yet.

“you would be a good salesman,” he tells lance. “youve got the charisma for it.”

“keith, that is literally the meanest thing youve ever said to me. no offense, but to suggest i would spend my life sitting in a cubicle is unforgivable. to each their own, though. when all the little kids in your third grade class were saying, i want to be a firefighter! and, i want to be a princess! what made you snap up your suspenders and say, i want to sell eco-friendly plastic cups!”

“i dont wear suspenders.”

“thats not the question i was asking.”

keith shrugs. hes laying down more than hes sitting up, which as a rule, is frowned upon when using couches in this apartment. lance has been a bad influence in this regard. “its practical.”

“did you have to take business classes and everything?”

“i took them, yeah.”

lance throws his head back and groans, pokes keith’s thigh teasingly with his big toe. “man, i cant imagine going to school to actually learn a useful life skill. whats job security like?”

staring up at the ceiling, keith is unsettled to find that he knows the answer. “boring.”

lance sits up. “huh?”

“its too easy,” says keith. “every day, its just selling cups. a moron could do it. and my boss doris is a peach, but this morning she stood at karen’s cubicle across from mine for a straight hour talking about plants.”

“plants are so practical,” says lance. “you have a house plant in the corner.” he points at herman.

“his name is herman.”

lance’s eyes blow wide. “dude! no way! you named your plant! i didnt think you were the type!”

“ive never said his name out loud with another person in the room before.”

lance covers his face with both hands and wheezes. “you talk to herman when no one else is in the room.”

lance does not say that he had been calling herman shelby.

“theres a smaller one on my desk at the office named sherman,” says keith.

“not judging, dude, but why would you give so much of yourself to this job if it isnt what you want to do?”

keith shrugs again. “its practical.”

“im a music major and i dont buy that shit. why dont you do what you love? like, how does the time that you spend not doing whatever it is you love not a giant waste?”

“because...” keith feels like a robot. “its practical.”

“if practicality didnt matter, what would you do?”

keith considers lance, considers himself. he finds the answer but decides that its too scary right now.

“i’d sell cups on the moon.”

lance busts a gut. the seriousness of the topic derailed, keith presses play, and they go back to watching the episode. lance doesnt interrupt for the remainder of the episode, and when keith looks over, he realizes its because lance has fallen asleep. with his legs spread over keith’s lap. when had they gotten there? keith couldnt move now. he had work in the morning.

he was also already in his pajamas. and the sofa was warm enough, and the heating was on in preparation for winter. and keith was already up later than he normally stayed awake...

he woke up with sunlight streaming peacefully on his eyelids. that was usually a luxury saved for the weekends. SUNLIGHT? keith’s eyes popped open, and he remembered all at once talking with lance, falling asleep, lance. last night had been a lance-heavy night. his toes were underneath keith’s shirt, his face smushed into the cushions.

keith clawed his phone out of his pocket as he extracted himself from the couch, from lance. 9:08. shit shit shit shit. 2 missed calls from doris. he ran into his room, where his alarm clock had been screaming for two and a half hours now, and threw on a dress shirt, pants, and shoes, then he rocketed out the door, his phone already pressed to his ear. hi doris sorry sorry sorry i overslept im leaving now i’ll be right here this wont happen again.

his coworkers dont let him live it down. all day its, how ya doing, keith? hows that perfect punctuality youre always harping about? crazy hook up with your take-home pile, was it? doris is the only one who is understanding, and, luckily, her opinion of the situation is all that matters.

“whatever kept you,” she says, “i hope you had fun.”

keith is exhausted by the time he gets home. he unknots his tie on the way to his room, and as he passes lance’s door, he hears the soft tones of music from inside. he pauses. knocks. lance calls, “come in.”

keith pokes his head inside. theres lance, several instruments sprawled across his floor, and him in the center of them, a ukulele in his hands. keith smiles. “sounds good,” he says.

lance gives him a sympathetic eyebrow raise. “you look like shit.”

“thanks.”

“come sit down.”

grateful for the invitation, keith obeys, unraveling his tie all the way. he likes that lance doesnt make him say anything. he goes back to playing music, singing, a soft song that has keiths eyelids fluttering shut and his shoulders relaxing before they can help it.

the next week, lance’s semester ends. he heads home to swap the old year for a new model, see his family, catch up with neighborhood friends. theres the weirdest disconnect he gets where he turns to make a comment to someone, expecting them to be someone else, and gets frustrated.

keith, meanwhile, has resorted to calling shiro at night to somehow break this god awful silence. they get together on christmas, which helps. hes ready to spend new years alone with the LGBT section of Netflix when, at 10:14 PM, his phone rings in a way it doesnt usually. He presses accept, and suddenly Lance is grinning at him in a room full of shouting Cubans.

“Keith! My man! How’s it hanging! No, shut up Marcia, I’m busy. Hey, what’s up!”

Keith is a little bewildered. “Um. Hey.”

“hold on, its super loud in here. let me get to my room so i can actually hear you.”

“why did you call?” asks keith.

lance gives him a look as he enters a much more quiet space. “because my spidey senses told me that you were sitting alone on your couch like a loser right now.”

keith frowns down at his comfortable pajamas. “i am not a loser.”

“of course not,” lance agrees. “thats thanks to me, by the way, and my amazing ability to be in two places at once, thanks to facetime.”

“hows home?” keith asks, aware that suddenly they were chatting, and that the frown he’d been carrying around for days had magically lifted itself off his face. lance is as excitable as ever, even when hes miles and miles away, and keith wonders at the idea of all this distance theyve lived with between them suddenly closed. its an interesting thought.

he doesnt realize how long lance has kept him talking until 11:59, when lance brings his attention to the countdown clock. the inside of keith’s chest feels warm and calm knowing that lance didnt want keith to be alone on new years, and that he cared enough to sit in his room for two hours talking at a screen, and that he was choosing to spend the passover to midnight with keith.

at midnight, keith clinks a glass of champagne against his phone, as does lance, and they drink together. then, lance sombers.

“hey, um. i wanted to thank you for everything you did for me last semester,” says lance. “im still trying to put things together for the spring, but if you want, i could let you know how it goes. i mean, i dont want to stop talking to you, or knowing you.”

keith is utterly lost. “what are you talking about?”

now lance looks confused. “the end of the semester,” he says.

“what about it?”

“my apprenticeship.”

Apprenticeships only lasted a semester!

keith actually slapped his forehead. “lance!” he said, sitting up and clutching his burning phone tighter. He’d had to plug it in an hour ago. “why didn’t you remind me? are you trying to tell me you left? that you literally left to go back home without saying goodbye?”

“you didnt say goodbye!” lance defends, voice getting shrill. “i thought you werent the type!”

“i thought you werent leaving! or, i mean, i thought you were coming back right after!”

“I literally packed out my whole room, keith.”

“people need things when they go home.”

lance shook his head, dumbfounded. “i cant believe we’re having this conversation. what are you going to do without me? yes, keith, im back home and scouring the forums for a new roommate next semester. im trying to have a bonding moment where i thank you for everything youve done for me, but youre ruining it by being an idiot.”

“damn it, lance. you dont have to move out. youre more than welcome to keep living here. lance? did you freeze?”

“what? no. i just. i kind of thought you hated me.”

hate? the literal opposite. keith had to fight not to be sarcastic. “i dont hate you. i want you to stay here. not as a favor, but because this place feels weird without you here now. its as much yours as it is mine. we can put you on the lease if you want.”

“keith, that is the grossest, most adult thing youve ever said to me. of course i will legally sign a binding contract with my name next to yours.”

did lance just... keith’s smaller face went red next to lance’s bigger face. keith sat up a little straighter. “um, cool. cool. when you get back, then. so, you are coming back?”

“yes,” said lance. “and thank god it means i dont have to live with smelly jeremy and his flea-ridden dogs. just your flea-ridden mullet.”

keith narrowed his eyes and hung up.

he got a text from lance saying, see yr flea-tastic self on january 25th, then marked the day down in his phone. afterward, he opened the door to lance’s room, which was indeed empty. keith’s heart went a little spastic at the thought that january 25th could have come and gone, and he would have had no idea that lance had not been planning to return. he called shiro and berated him for not talking about the apprenticeship more often, so keith would have been prepared.

lance comes back and brings the sun with him. keith, who has been this close to quitting his job every time he walks into work, could not be happier. they move lance’s things in together, which involves a lot of stopping and making fun of lance’s possessions on keith’s part. lance grins and goes for the mullet, and somehow they end up wrestling on the floor.

keith thinks, i cant not kiss him.

and then his phone vibrates against his leg. he remembers that lance is living here because he has nowhere else to go, and that putting him in this position if he doesnt feel the same way about keith is a horrible thing to do. he untangles himself, guilty.

“where are you going?” demands lance. “i was winning!”

“its doris,” says keith. “gotta take it.”

speaking of doris, she notices. at 6pm the next day, she stops by keiths cubicle. “been a while since we last met here, sugarcake. trouble at home?”

theres no one else in the office, and keith is close to a meltdown. he swivels to face doris, hangs his head, and says, “i think im in love with my roommate lance.”

her face doesnt betray an ounce of shock, but rather, shes giving him the same look shiro used to when keith would talk about nightmares. keiths heart shatters from being touched by kindness. he doesnt leave the office for another hour, not because he was working, but because that night doris lets him tell her everything.

lance is still in class when keith gets home, eats, showers, and gets ready for bed. he almost doesnt know what to do with himself now that theres a whole other conscious entity living in this house--his fucking emotions. he has his hair pulled back, his pajamas on, and hes just getting ready to call it a night when the front door opens and lance tosses his bag in its usual spot under the window.

“hey,” he says, surprised to see keith up. “dont want to miss the early bird special tomorrow. what’re you doing up?”

“can we play?” asks keith.

lance is clearly doubly surprised, but he guides keith into his room. its as blissfully messy as it was before lance left for break. “you said we. do you play?”

keith picks up a lap-sized keyboard. “i used to.”

“i didnt know that. why didnt you say?”

“because you wouldve asked me to play with you.”

“thats true.” lance picks his ukulele, and they start to improvise together, each learning how the other plays, adjusting. “you werent kidding, you really play.”

“i wasnt kidding,” says keith.

suddenly, lance stops. “hey, is everything alright? youre acting weird. dont tell me youre regretting asking me to move back in.”

“no,” keith says immediately. “no, im just wondering if maybe... are you happy here? or is this just a roommate situation?”

“what do you mean, is this just a roommate situation?”

“you know what i mean.”

“no,” says lance. “i dont.”

“i mean,” says keith, “do you actually like living here, or do you live here because im your only option?”

lance sets down his ukulele. “i like living here because the bathroom tiles are cold when i get out of the shower so i hop to the rug by the door and pray to god i dont slip and break my neck. and because the sunset turns the kitchen wall purple while i make pasta. and because im the only one who can put my feet up on the coffee table. and because the cereal is arranged in alphabetical order and the plant’s name is herman. i like living here. here feels like home.”

keith kisses him. he stands up and backs away just as quickly, guilty, unable to believe he had just crossed the line like that. god, he’s going to have to tell doris about this. she would rip his head off so politely.

“what the fuck?” says lance, blunt and surprised. keith winces, about to apologize, when suddenly he’s being crowded up against the wall of his storage room, of lance’s bedroom, and kissed like his lips leaked chocolate. he melts. lance snakes one hand behind keith’s neck and the other around his waist, and keith tugs lance closer by the hips. the hand at keith’s neck digs into his hair and pulls out the hair tie. the hair tie disappears. keith pulls lance closer.

lance pulls back. “finally.”

“you had the option to make the first move, you know.”

“nah, not me, i’m a coward.”

“yeah, right.”

they kissed again, with keith holding tighter and lance staying longer. keith thinks, doris isnt going to believe this one.

that night, the taboo on keith’s bedroom door breaks when keith invites lance to sleep on a queen sized mattress. it takes lance a full five minutes to stop laughing at the clear cowboy paraphernalia keith inherited growing up in texas, but he doesnt mind curling up to sleep by the potted cactus on the nightstand, whose name he politely asks for.

keith stops killing himself working to sell eco-friendly plastic cups, and with all his spare time, he and lance start writing songs together. shiro, in a display of good sportsmanship, never points out that he was right.

#this is 6 thousand words #I WROTE THIS IN ONE SITTING WHEN I WAS SUPPOSED TO BE DOING NANOWRIMO SHIT #'oh yea i will write 4 thousand words tonight to catch up'#JOKES ON ME I HIT 4K BUT IT WASNT FOR PETER #anyway heres klance #klance au #keith kogane #lance mcclain #im fucking SOrRY for the length #also im not proofreading it its been 4 hours #take it or leave it my friends

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cnisms · 7 years

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wanted plots & established connections !

ok cool... this rlly aint shit but ! i’ve come up with some ideas (or alex reminded me of a bunch of connections i wrote for an rp that never opened) that i’d be down for. they’re not in order or anything bc there’s a few that could work for a couple different muses so i’ll just list those details after each one. if u see smth u would be down for just ... lmk :P here is my muse list for quick reference. updated w more !!

01. a box of friendship bracelets and low quality selfies from 2009 tucked away in a closet is all that survived a dynamic friendship that fizzled into nothing. as roommates, a & b shared everything – a set of first times included. then, interests they once shared began to change and both felt as if the other was leaving them behind. neither wanted to be seen chasing desperately after someone that wasn’t interested, so they both pretend they stopped caring long ago. (ex best friends, possibly romantic, misery !) paris, aja, arabella or angel for either muse a or b.

02. a & b were in an extremely close relationship for over a year, though their friends often debated the seriousness of it as they seemed to spend every second weekend broken up. heated arguments from friday were always completely forgotten by monday, much to everyone else’s frustration. it all came to an end when a particularly nasty argument forced a to take an abrupt vacation, coming back to find b already dating someone else. (ex romantic, drama n tension. that someone else could be an npc or another muse.) angel as muse a, percy as muse a, tomas as muse a or b, rosie as muse b, or luma as muse b.

03. though they had known one another for months before, a & b didn’t really clique until their first argument. ever since then, the two have held tight to their friendship and even more to their weekly debates. they fight about anything and everything, no matter how irrelevant or ridiculous. occasionally, things will get personal and they’ll go days without talking, but they always end up back on the same couch, ranting over wine and netflix. (close frenemies.) angel, alanis, rosie or zach as either muse.

04. everyone was well aware that a & b had always been partners in crime, many people joking to watch out for the troublesome two. just like siblings, the best friends were often bickering about something, but the frequent fights about a’s selfishness or b’s envy always came to a fast close with a playful punch. of course, there had to be a tipping point. when a heard that b had hooked up with a’s recent ex in their absence, they quickly came to the conclusion that their friendship was done for good. the two haven’t exchanged a single kind word since. (friends turned enemies. same w #2, the ex could be another muse or just an npc.) wes, elizabeth or angel as a. tomas, alanis or luma as b.

05. though they’d never been particularly close friends, a & b knew to turn to each other when seeking something they couldn’t get from those closest to them. just sex, no strings attached. it was the perfect arrangement, until it became clear that a didn’t really care about b’s personal life. b remains desperate to keep the affair secret, while a grows tired of playing it so safe. (oops . cheating plot . muse b would have to be in some kind of relationship w someone else, they could be npc tho.) luma, cici or percy as muse a. elizabeth or rosie as muse b.

06. intoxicated beyond reason when it was made, it’s no surprise that a & b regret a lot of the things on their bucket list. though they can back out whenever they want with no real consequence, neither are willing to be the first to stand down. with some of their tasks being embarrassing and most dangerous, everyone knows to watch out when these two get together to cross another challenge off the list. (dumbass friends always risking their lives for dares) percy, luma, constance or gia as either muse.

07. a & b spend more time together than apart, using expensive wine and room service to fill in the silence between giggles and gossip that should be used to address the elephant in the room: the mutual affection isn’t as platonic as they like to pretend. with their own experiences of romantic feelings destroying important friendships, despite the fact they both feel they are ready to get serious, they can’t help but stress the risk in their minds and wait for the other to make the first move. (romantic !!) natalya, helena, gia or arabella as either xx.

08. few people are lucky enough to find that one person they can count on for anything and everything, that’s why a has grown to resent the other people in b’s life. unaware of the jealousy, b has grown tired of the series of petty arguments that a has been attempting to start with them more recently. of course, the issue being left unaddressed has only added fuel to the fire. a has moved on to underhandedly interfering with b’s relationship in an effort to get their best friend back. (toxic bffship. one can’t handle the other having outside relationships (whether theyre romantic or platonic idk) so they scheme n make issues) luma, elizabeth or angel as muse a. luke or zach as muse b.

09. though they had always been friends, a & b grew especially close at the beginning of last year, often ditching their friendship group to go on their own adventures. on one of their messier summer nights, they slept together. the affair continued for months before they finally agreed to end it, though they only really stayed away from each other due to the fight that followed the conversation. despite their ruined friendship, a & b are forced to work together to keep the secret buried as their group grows more and more suspicious of them. (two people within a squad who went from being friends to lovers to enememes. they cheated on their s/os at the time. even tho they’re mad at each other, they’re still friends with both the exes (or current partners if any of them are still together) so they’re trying to keep their drama secret. the friendship group/partners could be other muses but also npc ? so much easier) luma, zach, paris, helena, ajay or gia as either muse.

10. committed to enmity, a & b have never let their mutual friends get in the way of their hatred for each other. there are very few events they consider important enough to save the argument for later, no strangers to bickering over brunches and formal dinners. though both refuse to give any real reasoning for their beef, everyone has their own idea. a & b grew tired of waiting for the other to apologize for the drama, deciding they’re beyond ever becoming friends. (enemies that are always being forced together by their mutual friends, detailed backstory could be developed) luma, mari, tomas, zach, ajay, helena, angel or anyone rlly as either.

11. always swearing the other was the love of their life, everyone was shocked at the demise of a & b’s very public relationship. though a appeared to deal with this much better than b, moving on to a string of hookups soon after the breakup, neither made any attempt at trying to play civil for the sake of the group. it wasn’t until just recently, when they were forced to be alone together for the first time in over a year, that they began to talk. a warm friendship quickly blossomed, though awkward moments are neither few nor fleeting as unresolved heartbreak hangs in the air. (lovers finally turned friends w a nice touch of angst) luma or zach as muse a. aja, helena or luke as muse b.

12. though a & b often claim that their beef is simply due to conflicting personalities, it’s quite clear that their separate histories with the same people play a huge part in their inability to get along. the extremity of this differs day to day, sometimes acting as frenemies exchanging snide remarks, to full blown screaming matches that secretly entertain those around them. everyone else has come to accept the fact that the two have no interest in forming a genuine friendship. (2 ppl who hate eachother bc of a mutual ex. could be an npc or another muse) tomas, percy, rosie or alanis as either.

13. a & b were quick to become best friends and have never been anything else since the day they met. for them, it’s nice knowing that someone always has their back no matter what goes on in their lives, but the rest of their friends aren’t so fond of them together. others often complain that they’re tired of the two always getting involved and fighting each other’s battles. as life forces them apart more and more often, they’ve begun to wake up to the codependent nature of their friendship. (codependent bffs that need to cool it but just love each other so dang much it ain’t easy) aja, zach or elizabeth as either.

14. a & b were always a ‘will they, won’t they’ situation to those around them, one always being interested in the other at the wrong time. they often joke about all the missed opportunities and behave as if they’re fine just being friends, but with the mutual crush returning stronger than ever before, they know it’s only a matter of time before they have to sacrifice either their friendship or their other relationships. (right there . a will they/wont they kinda relationship. one or both would have to have a lil smth going on w/ another muse or npc for the drama) constance, rosie, arabella or ajay as either.

15. after the demise of a long relationship, a began hooking up with b. the agreement was that they’d be friends with benefits and nothing else, b even writing up a list of rules for a to abide by. unsurprisingly, it didn’t last long before a was falling hard for b. no real interest in a relationship with the other, b cut a off completely. a had no choice but to attempt to move on. since then, a has never attempted to play nice with b, who so coldly broke their heart. (fwb turned enemies !!) wes, arabella, luke or beck as muse a. alanis, tomas or luma as muse b.

16. when a felt as though all their relationships were falling apart, b was there to comfort them. what was intended to be just a shoulder to cry on grew into a pure and satisfying friendship that exceeds all expectations. people often pressure the two to date and they won’t deny they’ve each had a desire to do so at different times, but they’ve dismissed these feelings as passing crushes. (platonic, fleetingly romantic) wes, aja, paris or zach as either.

17. a & b are about as different as two people can be, proving that opposites do not always attract. a makes no effort to hide the fact that they think lowly of b, while b isn’t afraid to put a in their place. there are a few, rare moments between arguments where they’ll feel bad for what was said and maybe even share a laugh, but this never lasts long before they’re bickering about something else. (negative) rosie, elizabeth, tomas, mari, helena, arabella or percy as a. wes, zach, paris or gia as b.

18. once a realized people always want what they can’t have, they quickly covered up their long-term crush on b and began giving them the cold shoulder. not much time went by before b took the bait, discovering a new interest in a. they’ve been playing this game of cat and mouse for quite some time, though neither are willing to throw in the towel. despite pretending otherwise, a enjoys the attention, but they’re looking for commitment, and they’re well aware that b is just looking for fun. (romantic (kinda)) aja, arabella or helena as a. rosie, percy or luma as b.

19. ‘ride or dies’ is the term most would use to describe a & b. together, they’ve been through more than most people can imagine. surely, you would think, there has to be a line you’d draw, even when it comes to your best friend. a & b, however, are dangerously committed to each other. it doesn’t matter what one says or does, the other will always have their back without a second thought of the consequences. (another pair of dumbass bffs) angel, zach, paris, gia or luma as either.

20. a & b never really got along, always failing to understand what their friends saw in the other. unlike other people within their group, they were always good at remaining civil for everyone else’s sake, but it’s grown increasingly difficult. following a recent blow up, a & b have realized that what they share may no longer be disinterest, both secretly blaming the argument on sexual tension. (enemies that wanna [ b vc ] smex it) rosie, natalya, ajay or alanis as either.

21. it was just luck that a & b ended up at the same resort on vacation years ago, agreeing to make the most of it. somewhere between sneaking out at night and away from their families during the day, the two fell in love. it seemed perfect and a couldn’t imagine anything better, which is why they were so shocked when they got home and b acted as if nothing happened between them and began dating someone else. while a never cried over b, they had an extremely difficult time getting over b. (exes) mari, bobbie, gia or paris as either tbh. cici as b.

22. just because a & b can’t say exactly when and how they wound up in an exclusive relationship, doesn’t mean it’s not important to them. what was meant to be just another fling escalated into something serious quite naturally, though there are some shared moments where they feel as if they’re back to being nothing more than friends. too distracted by their own outside interests to commit to solving these currently minuscule problems, the two risk destroying their relationship. (ppl who are dating but sometimes it seems like they’re nothin more than friends. could be poly!!) zach, luke, paris or aja as either.

23. a & b are always getting accused of being frenemies by those around them, and they’re unlikely to reject that idea, even when they’re together. for as long as anyone can remember, the two have traded petty insults and pressured one another into terrible ideas. still, no matter how bad things get, they continue to spend every other day attached at the hip, trying to get the other into trouble. (another frenemy plot just w more headassary) gia, percy or luma as either.

24. both strong personalities on their own, a & b together are a force to be reckoned with. the two had a strong friendship, always supporting each other, until they both admitted their deepest secrets. when they sobered up, they decided they’d made a mistake, but weren’t willing to talk about it. now burdened with another secret that could hurt others, as well as knowing the other could ruin their own relationships at any moment, the pair have no idea how to act around each other. (basically friends who arent on the best terms rn after finding out each others deepest n darkest secrets which would have to be worked out obviously) tomas, natalya or mari as either.

25. much to their disgust, people are always asking a & b if they are related due to their constant bickering. after dating for years, the two felt they grew to know each other too well, ending the romantic relationship to just be friends. staying true to their word, they have remained incredibly close. whenever one has an embarrassing question or a disgusting story to share, it’s the other they text. they figure there’s no harm done as they’ve already seen each other at their worst. (romantic turned platonic) gia, bobbie, zach or beck.

26. a year ago, a would have done anything for b, believing they had the perfect, fairy-tale romance going on. truthfully, it was almost perfect, which is exactly why b felt the need to screw it up before they got too deep. in the long run, the carefully considered decision to cheat on a ended up hurting b just as much. now that a has moved on and is comfortable in b’s company again, they’ve begin to regret the loss. despite their previous fears, b has become determined to win a’s affection back. (romantic. angsty . whom knows) arabella, bobbie or luke as a. rosie or tomas as be.

27. a & b are described as being a package deal. you get both or you get none, one rarely being seen without the other. the best friends are known to take spontaneous trips without notifying anyone else, sometimes putting them at odds with the rest of their friends, who the two often accuse of being jealous of their friendship. because of their commitment to one another, a’s social life suffers due to b’s preference for staying in and hanging out one on one. while a tries to be understanding of b’s situation they can’t help the feeling of resentment that grows every time they turn down another invitation to stay at home with b. (best friends who have conflicting ideas of fun) bella, alanis, paris, percy or luma as a. wes, zach, natalya or helena as b.

28. a & b have become known for club hopping all night and drinking too much when together, often forcing them to cancel plans with their other friends the day after. because of this, everyone else has grown to dislike the pair’s friendship, but that only forces them closer together. it’s true that all they really do together is encourage each other’s bad habits, but they’re too busy having fun to notice. (again. pals who need to sort their priorities out but will they ? probably not.) luma, elizabeth, percy, cici or constance as either.

29. for years, a & b have been confusing others with their constantly changing relationship status. they will spend a few months in an exclusive relationship, a few months in an open relationship, then a few months apart, only to go back and start all over again. currently on their third month of being together, everyone is watching and waiting for the cracks to show before walking away from the relationship yet again. (break up..make up.. total ..waste of.. time) zach, paris, mindy or gia as either.

30. often labeled as high school sweethearts, a & b have been serious for years. for a long time, the two shared an extremely conventional relationship, both very happy with their situation. however, with their lives changing in recent years, changes to the relationship were unavoidable. both feel neglected by the other more often than not, but whenever an issue is brought up, it only leads to an argument. while everyone else expects the two to get engaged any day now, a & b often question if they still really want to be together. (they dont actually have 2 be high school sweethearts just a couple thats been together ... for a long while n things are getting rough.) arabella, ajay, beck, zach or aja as either. alternatively could be an exes plot n a few yrs after the breakup n i can offer rosie, helena, natalya & luke on top of the others.

31. once close friends, a & b drifted apart when other relationships got in the way. even though they saw a lot of each other following, things between the two have been tense for years. after sharing a kiss in a silly game at a recent party, a & b were able to have a laugh together for the first time in forever. since then, their friendship has been on the mend, but this may not be a good thing. with both noticing some romantic feelings growing them, they suspect that their relationship may come to an uglier end this time. (ex pals turned crushes who truly are not compatible) bobbie, beck, zach or rosie as either.

32. a & b’s relationship is only a few months old, and the two are still very much in the honeymoon phase of things. flashing their pet names and exciting dates on instagram, they’ve convinced themselves that things are perfect. however, a appears to have taken the agreement that things between them should remain as relaxed as possible a little more seriously than b would have liked. a often fails to invite b to certain events and outings, assuming they would prefer not to go anyway. this grates on b’s nerves, who is beginning to feel that a doesn’t spend enough time with them. (a new relationship struggling between being casual n legit) paris, aja, ajay or gia as a. arabella, zach or beck as b.

33. despite already knowing each other, a & b weren’t all that close before hooking up. their friends with benefits arrangement lasted for months before they began seeing other people more seriously. since calling it off, the two have remained incredibly close, leading others to believe that their relationship is more than platonic. (fwb turned just friends but like ... there is potential) wes, angel, bobbie, ajay, zach or rosie as either.

#smoke:wanted #no proofreading we die like men

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victoriousk9 · 7 years

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Ruff Luv

Can you tell from my immediate lack of updates that raising a puppy is one of the hardest things to ever do?…

I knew it would be hard and I knew it would take work but I may have underestimated. I’m sure if you’re not flying solo it may be slightly easier, but single puppy Mom life is RUFF. Since I last wrote, our days have been filled with the same routine over and over. Vet visits and training sessions every two weeks. It seems like non-stop work with the most minimal results. The vet has you visiting every two weeks for shots and boosters and depending on if the appointment is with a tech or with the actual vet, the price of the appointments varies anywhere from $35-$135 a visit. Then you have private training every two weeks at $100 a lesson. Not to mention everything else in between - LIKE PUPPY FOOD and gas to get you all these places!

The lifestyle change IS REAL: We try and do the same things each day as close to the same time as possible.

8 AM wake up, out to potty. Then we sit on the deck and try and practice our CHILL until it’s time to eat around 8:30/8:45 AM. After that we try to potty again and sit for a little more before going back into the crate so I can get ready for work. Once I’m fully ready to go, I run him out for one more time to potty before he goes back in the crate and I head out for work. I come home for an hour each day around 3-4 PM for more potty breaks and mid-day feeding. Then back to work until I get home around 9 PM to potty and eat again. After this I try and have Vic out for an hour or two and then it’s bed by 11 PM or Midnight! On Fridays and Saturdays we do the same thing only the routine shifts an hour earlier. On days off we start about an hour later with our wake up routine but the rest of the day is more filled with at least one solid adventure for Vic and as much out of crate time as possible. We repeat the same damn things every day and I’m not sure if we are just progressing really slowly or if we are right around where we should be for 4 months old.

At our 3rd training we were really discouraged. I say WE because I REALLY felt Vic was just as stressed as I was. I really like the trainer, but just like any parent, I AM going somewhere for a (free) second opinion this week.

During feeding time is when we do most of his training as he is being trained 95% with his food & good praise, 4% with just good praise and 1% with treats. Feeding/Training time goes like: Filling a fanny pack with the amount of food Vic eats per feeding (about 1 cup 3x a day) and then rewarding him with his food by hand after he successfully does what I want him to do.

Things we know so far and will do mostly, with or without food, (except when we choose not to listen): Victor, Sit, No.

Things we are learning to get better at but we get nothing for: LEAVE IT, DROP IT, NO.

Things we know so far and will do for food :Sit, Down

Things we will do sometimes for nothing but mostly for a treat: “Go to your room”

Things we are working on with food and treats: Heeling, Sit’s and Down’s forever

Things we want to get better at: Time spent staying in the sit/down position until released. Going back and forth between both.

Things that seem to go nowhere: No biting, No jumping. No means no

Things we still want to learn: EVERYTHING ~ Especially that consequences aren’t a game! I always had a feeling if I had a kid he’d be as big a brat as I was!

~Well its definitely challenging and exhausting and frustrating but through ALL that, it’s still somehow so strangely rewarding. Like it’s just, this is my fucking dog, and that’s cool. He’s with me. And he’ll get it. We have time to get it. So. Yeah.

I would like to make one update here a week but we are going to have to see how that goes. We move in two weeks so I am hoping the new place creates some positive changes: Pet wise there will be NO CARPET, only hard wood so accidents will be less detrimental. And there is a HUGE fenced in yard so Vic can “run it out” WAY more often. Its also a first floor so there wont be any running a puppy up and down a flight of old wooden steps. Hopefully he will start to understand NOT going to the bathroom in the house if he can be run outside to grass faster than it takes me to run him down steps. There is also more space so hopefully the cats can get some peace. They still aren’t too happy.

In more exciting news, I have been taking Victor on adventures out in the woods and on trails. I use his long cloth leash for that and he is so much more well behaved out there. Walking him downtown is a nightmare. But taking him out into the cut for fun is the best!

Adventure pics!:

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plxyboi-blog · 5 years

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Carolyn Hax: I don’t want to be a fat couple any more but my husband won’t lose weight with me

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Carolyn Hax: I don’t want to be a fat couple any more but my husband won’t lose weight with me

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Dear Carolyn:

My spouse and I have the two obtained important weight because we’ve been married, but I am trying to mitigate that with diet program and exercising. He isn’t, and just about every time I attempt to discuss about it, he would make me sense like the bad person for bringing it up.

Seem, we’re the two approaching forty, and I know we’ll under no circumstances be the “twinks” we had been when we achieved, but I’d like to be far better than I am, and I am getting it pretty tricky to get healthy without the need of his help.

He’s pre-diabetic. He has rest apnea. His sexual intercourse drive is nowhere close to what it was when we achieved. And it really is aggravating because all of this is correctable and he is refusing to even attempt. It truly is like he doesn’t care.

I adore my spouse. I will under no circumstances “fat-disgrace” him, and I know my weight struggles are not his issue. But I would discover it a lot less difficult to tackle this if he had been much more supportive, and if he would attempt to be much healthier, way too. I don’t know what to do, shorter of supplying him an ultimatum: It truly is me or the sugar, dude. Acquire your decide.

— Anonymous

Carolyn:

I wouldn’t do that — not until you’re all set to reduce.

Not because he likes sugar far better or because you are not somehow value it to him, but because meals is a formidable opponent that fights filthy.

For a single, you two cannot just banish meals from your life and commence around you cannot transfer away from it or expend time only with buddies who abstain from it. You’re in its existence at the very least two or a few moments a day as you struggle it, and the relaxation of the time it really is contacting to you from the kitchen.

And, a lot of it is engineered to tempt or outright addict you.

And, our bodies are wired to keep on to fat more durable every time we attempt to get rid of it. And lousy diet and inactivity can direct towards depression, which can direct to lousy diet and inactivity.

And so on, as you’ve got no question discovered as you go by way of this oneself. So look at that even you sense overmatched without the need of his help, nonetheless you are so a lot even further along emotionally than he is: You’ve got designed the decision to tackle this, and commenced producing tricky changes.

He’s just not there nonetheless and would not get there on borrowed drive he demands his individual. A lot of it. Anything he does in reaction to an ultimatum would not truly be his.

It truly is not hopeless, always. It truly is just that, if he does alter, it really is heading to be on his routine, for his causes.

This also doesn’t suggest you cannot talk up. He warrants to know what his everyday living partner sees in and feels about him, and what his inertia might in the long run value him — none of which counts as fat-shaming. It truly is everyday living-alerting. If you have not nonetheless been genuine with him, then notify him kindly: You mourn the loss of his sexual intercourse drive, and wrestle deeply with seeing a pillar of your everyday living self-destruct.

You can also question him how he desires you to handle your concern hereafter. This is an underrated step. You’ve got interpreted his desire from his defensiveness, but that’s not the very same as figuring out what he desires you to say or not say. As well as, asking him forces him to imagine about what he desires — not just from you, but from himself.

From now on, way too, you can question him to be part of you on walks, every time you go. Acquire of course or no for an solution without the need of reacting.

Most essential, after you have designed these factors and questioned your issues, stop conversing about it — and quietly keep accomplishing almost everything you can “to be far better than I am.” A sustained effort and hard work is tougher without the need of his help, of course, but it is your most effective argument to get that help. Making changes towards the pull of temptation and rate of metabolism claims these changes are attainable, and that information, sent steadily, wordlessly, lovingly, without the need of judgment, around time, is much more persuasive than ultimatums can at any time be.

Dear Carolyn:

I stay in a cul-de-sac. It is a great spot for youngsters to participate in. When my son was youthful, I taught him to be respectful of cars and trucks, to transfer to the sidewalk and wait for them to go.

These days the youngsters refuse to transfer. The other day a visitor advised me a youthful boy of about 12 would not transfer and, as my visitor sat waiting, flipped him off.

Do you say something to the baby or parent, or do you hope there is karma?

— L.

Carolyn:

If my baby at any time flips you off, then please notify me. I also encourage you to address my baby straight, though I’ll have an understanding of if you really don’t sense at ease or just have far better issues to do than participate in village.

I am going to give your neighbors the profit of the question and suppose they want the very same help with civilizing their youngsters.

If you really don’t know the dad and mom and/or really don’t sense at ease speaking up, then, of course, which is what karma is for.

Carolyn Hax commenced her suggestions column in 1997, following 5 several years as a duplicate editor and information editor in Design and none as a therapist. Electronic mail Carolyn at [email protected], abide by her on Fb atwww.fb.com/carolyn.hax or chat with her on the web at midday Japanese time each Friday atwww.washingtonpost.com.

Bookmark NJ.com/View. Follow us on Twitter @NJ_View and on Fb at NJ.com View. Get the most up-to-date information updates suitable in your inbox. Subscribe to NJ.com’s newsletters.

#Nutrition to Lose Fat

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kimboly27 · 5 years

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People are strange........

I’ve been meaning to get back on here and just say whats on my mind and so im going to start with the interesting world of people and us as humans. Some of this may not make any sense to anyone and thats ok but for me, i like to just talk and see what happens.

But before i get to where i am now with people,i sort of have to go back to where my thoughts on people sort of changed over the years......

November 4th 2011 and i lost my dad in one of the most horrific traffic collisions to happen in the UK. The first 3 to 4 years from that were hell and i can easily admit that. From that day my whole life was turned upside down and changed. Going through court cases,enquiries,the press hunting you down,people either being there for you or not being there at all. Something like that effects people differently. I’ve seen the best in people over the years and I've also seen the worst for whatever reasons. But my attitude to people has changed since then and continues to do so.

With all that going on as well i also went through a real shitty relationship with a right bastard. Im not sorry for saying that either as he really was. He was a narcissistic wanker who took full advantage of me going through some real shit stuff to then being his punching bag. Thankfully only mentally but the damage was done and its taken me a few years to get over such a person who treats another person like shit. When you are one minute made to feel like the most important person in the world to then the shit on the bottom of someones shoe,oh boy does it mess you up. But saying that,the best thing that asshole ever did was end it with me and F off somewhere up north. He will forever be a F up and continue to abuse people/woman because he is just pure evil and will never get help for his many many issues and will NEVER be happy and that tbh makes me happy,but of course i dont think about that waste of breath anymore,but soon it’ll be i think 5 years since he ended it and i got away from all that bs and i could not be happier. Yeah sure i had to start from scratch mentally on myself as that f***er took every bit of confidence i had in me and destroyed me, but i can now at least say i have never been happier.

With becoming happier and more confident again i see the attitudes and responses i get from people. After dealing with a narc my view on people,male or female is well lets say guarded i guess. If you know me well enough,you’ll know i’ll talk to anyone about anything,but for me it takes me a while to make sure whoever this person is,is a good person and actually will have a positive vibe for me to go with. That might sound crazy and like ‘’Wtf kim you cant judge people like that’’ but actually i can. Its a simple thing of i dont have time for bull shitters,attention seekers,time wasters,two faced assholes,backstabbers etc. Within a short space of time i make up my mind about people pretty quickly on if i want to spend more time with them or not,and its shame we live in world where people get so bloody upset by this notion. Its simple really. If i think you are an idiot or not someone i want to spend my time with then i wont and there is nothing wrong in that. Relationships will always facinate me and amuse me because my life is so different from others. Example point - Actually being someone again. I am very independent nowadays and tbh for anyone to try and break through that then bloody good luck lol But i am single by choice because i do actually really love being on my own but also i know deep down i cant commit to anyone due to being a full time carer to my mum. If anyone special came into my life they would have to deal with being second best as my family come first and foremost before anything else. If they can deal with maybe seeing me once or twice every few weeks and stuff like that then go for it. But i dont think there is many people that could deal with my lifestyle. I am use to the crazy of it but its wrong to ask others to be in my life with all that i have on. Yeah sure i’ve met some wonderful people i thought maybe it might work out with but sadly it was not meant to be and im ok with that as they are still very dear friends to me.

This may sound crazy too but i have rules,as it were,when it comes to people/social media things like that. Now yes social media to me can be a blessing and a curse. I have all sorts of pros and cons over the years of it,but normally sadly it does come down to the stupid people on the other end of it. One example of many. So i go to a lot of comic cons and have done since 2015 when i first met Matt Ryan at Wales comic con and fell in love with the Assassins Creed games. Since then i have been so lucky to meet a few of the Va’s of the games from older to newer games and continue to do so and also support them in any other work they also do. Anyway coming back to social media and at cons if there is an AC guest there i will,if i can try and get said guest(s) involved in AC cosplay meet ups and i have been SO lucky to have had the chance to work with some fantastic VA’s over the years and make it happen. Sometimes i’m not even holding the meet up myself but the VA has asked me if its ok to go along and i take them which im so so humbled by. But anyway back to the example of idiots and social media. Before the last AC game come out,i had taken a little time away from gaming all together due to home life taking a more important role to play that needed my time and attention. Now any normal human being would actually understand this and respect this but i did try and keep people posted on any cons and events the AC cast were appearing at. I was in one AC group that sadly was run by some real ego maniacs and people that cant organise a piss up in a brewery and also just very bitter and jealous people when it came to others achieving something in the AC world. Like my god the attitude some of these assholes would show, was just disgusting and it killed my passion and excitement for the new game. They would make fun of cosplayers that had worked bloody hard on their cosplays in the messenger we had set up for the FB page that i was apart of and just talk shit most of the time,and other times not even AC related. But anyone like i said last year was a bloody hard one for me mentally with things going on at home and i had no time or patience for idiots.

Last May just as i was on my way to London MCM i found out on the bus itself,that the game shop i was working in was going to close and i was gutted. Now i had ONLY decided to go to MCM to see the lovely Victoria Atkin and Patrica Summersett who are fantastic ladies in the VA world and have been in many games over the years so having been asked by Vic herself to be there and also part of the meet up that was happening,i got myself a friday and saturday ticket. London mcm is always a manic one but ok if you know where and when you need to get done things like that. The friday was more of a chilled day con wise and time to see Victoria and meet Patricia for the very first time and she was just fantastic! (More on that later) also some other VA’s as well that i hadnt met before or had seen and wanted to catch up with. Now before Vic and Patricia were announced i wasnt actually going to attend but was basically asked to by Vic so should and Patricia could come to the meet up. Great! No problem at all i though.........

I was nervous about telling the idiots in the fb group i was with,that i was going to be bringing along special guests because my god this lot dont have make easy things more bloody difficult. So it was about maybe 3 weeks before London MCM and i dropped in the messages that even though i was being quiet i was catching up when i could and that a guest was going to join us for the meet up. Now this fb group were so bloody anal about who ran meet ups. They always had to be done by someone on the admin/mod team (which i was so against tbh. If people wanted to meet up then bloody well let them) so whilst i was with this group i did mcm birmingham and a couple of wales comic con as i was a mod. I was keeping Vic updated on things once timings and location had been sorted and also to make sure she could come along as well. The time for the meet was basically decided a few days before the meet when the mcm schedules had gone up which was fine,but before this the miserable lot didnt want many people knowing that really this meet was happening. Tbh no one in that sodding group had great social skills as all they ever did was make it more stressful then it needed to be. On the years i didnt go,so many people told me how messed up the meets were and lots of shouting ect went on and tbh i wanted none of it. It was my first (and thankfully last) meet up being in that group of last year. Back to no one wanting people to know about it. Their reasoning's were they didnt want every tom dick and harry to come along unless they were in the AC group,they didnt really want anything on social media said about it either but i was very against that as Vic was so good at letting people know when meet ups were happening on twitter and instagram so that more people could join in on the fun and rightly bloody so too! So anyway the day of the con and the admin decide to change the sodding location of the meet so they think less people will turn up from where they normally have it. Bad move as that would later unveil. So i am at the event on the saturday and im messaging Vic to say about the new details and she is sharing away as well so thats fine by me she can do what she likes. Anyway on the saturday before the meet,there was a AC panel with Vic and Patricia and it was great and really fun and right at the end Vic announces that the meet up was happening right after the panel and to come along and follow me and two of my friends. I wont lie this next bit looked amazing haha. So the girls come off the stage and then Patricia asks me if its ok to come along which of course i say yes more then welcome. We wait for security who were fantastic btw,and really enjoyed the walk to the meet up. So at the front of this parade was my two friends in their ezio and jacob frye cosplays,then me in my frye twin mash up holding my prop up so the girls could see me. Then two security guards,then the girls and their handlers and then more security. The way that people moved out of the way for us was just fantastic. It was like parting of the waves and peoples faces were like so in well surprised at what was going on but also followed along to the meet which was cool. Anyway it was a bit of a walk but we soon get to the meet up and i introduce Vic and Patricia to everyone and there was some very happy faces and really lovely people asking me how on earth i keep getting VA’s to come along lol I dont do anything special i just ask them haha. So anyway pictures are done with the girls and cosplayers and its all good fun and they were with us for about 15 mins if that and we did cosplay stuff and also admin/mod photos with the girls too which was fine and social media stuff for the girls as well which was fun. They soon leave and i feel like collapsing to the floor after tbh weeks of stress trying to sort things out and it was a huge relief things went ok for them and i thought everyone else. There was a few omg moments but not to do with me thankfully but it didnt look very well lets say professional and that was bs because the meet had moved and others didnt know so some shit kicked off but yeah that was not my problem to sort.

Anyway i go back into the venue not long after the meet to basically see some folk and also was asked by the girls to swing by again before i left the con as i was only there the friday and saturday due to money and having just lost my job i wasnt in the best of moods but they did help so much. A few days of the con pass and pictures are posted up as usual blah blah but the messages within the group about the meet up are well not great. The vibe i got was basically they werent happy with how Vic was somehow but they werent saying that exactly so i basically said in all the times i’ve met any voice actors and got to work with them there has never been any ego’s or bs just a lot of fun. They didnt really see what i was getting at as i know they didnt get my involvement with who i had worked with so far and were beyond jealous it was so damn easy to see. But yeah their slight digs at Vic pissed me off so again went back to ignoring the messages coming through as it was just all nonsense chat.

Another thing this pathetic group didnt like was other members being in other AC groups and this is what finished it for me cos it got so stupid. Now before the bs happened which i’ll explain next, i am and still in over 30 plus other ac groups or ac cosplay related groups and have done meet ups in other countries ffs so you should not be told who you can and cant do that with. Anyway what happened was a little before MCM London i got asked on twitter by the lovely AC United Kingdom page if i would like to help them out on their social media sites to which of course i said yes. This group have been so amazing to me since they asked me to join and its been a blast with people that are so supportive and love what i do to help promote stuff for VA’s and things like that. I was very honoured to be asked. Anyway the older group found out i was added and also another mod and f*** me did they kick off. When i then explained how i ended up in this group they soon shut up for a while and backed the F off. Now i know the other mod didnt like getting added and thats fine as being added to groups can be annoying so she left the new group i was now apart of as well and thats fair enough. Again i said my piece and left the chat as it was all going back to more rubbish talk.

A few weeks went by and i had saw that the guy who added me to the new AC group i was in was blocked from the old group i was i and i asked why. Oh boy that shit storm hit hard. Because i hadnt been that involved in the group chat or on the fb page they basically started on me which was hilarious to be honest. Now they booted my friend because he was adding their members to his own fb which was a big no no. I had also added members because i asked them if they would like to be apart of it. When i said this they were quiet for a little time and then went on this pity party of ‘’Well it doesnt matter as it seems lots are jumping ship and so we are going to close the group anyway. We’ll keep it open but no more meet ups or anything blah blah blah’’ It was literally like they had a toy taken from them and they were reacting like a shitty child. With that,and watching the melt down this lot were having my last message was something like ‘’well its been nice knowing you all take care’’ and that was it. Soon enough i was booted from that chat and kicked out of the group hahahaha. I was then informed they put a post up about closing the group as people were leaving and they couldnt be bothered with it anymore and just really stupid stuff tbh but they sounded so butt hurt it was unreal. So now comes in one of my rules. The second anyone walks out of my life,that is it for them. I dont chase people or find out answers i just let them do what they got to do and i do my own thing. I then deleted and blocked all of the admin and mods but one off of my fb because i wasnt going to let them kick me out of the group for their tantrum and then think its ok to watch what i do with me life. I dont f***ing think so. The next day a good friend had sent me a pic of one of the admins trying to play the victim card and butt hurt again that they had been removed from my life. Its simple. You walk out you never get the chance to come back or watch what i do. F*** no! So yeah i easily cut stupid people off.

I have other rules too and another is that if i have had no contact with someone on line or on the phone in over 6 months i delete/remove/block them from all my social media and also if their number is in my phone book i delete numbers too. Now tbh this should not need explaining to anyone but here is example two of why people just f*** me off.

Now i get on with anyone and everyone as i said and blokes especially as i’ve always been a bit of a tom boy and so girly girls i dont really get on with. Now i’ve made some great friends from the netherlands the last few years who are just wonderful and mean a lot to me and i will always do my best to go see them if i am over there or if they are going to festivals things like that i will go and support them. Anyway last may something happened at an event which was just blown out of proportion it was unreal. Lets use person A and person B as i dont like to use names. Now person A is from the netherlands and person B is from the UK. I have known for a long time that person B has liked person A and thats fair enough. Person A is still a great friend of mine and person B is no more. Now then at an event last year i got a little drunk with person A and it was a good laugh. Whilst walking together i happened to trip over something and my friend caught me and then heald my hand to help me walk as i was pretty drunk. That was nice of him. Now then at the same time this happened person B saw this happen and knowing the sort of person they are (a complete and utter immature asshole btw) i then get a message from a outside person saying i was a bad friend because i know how person B likes person A and what i was playing at blah blah blah. I laughed at the message as it really was BS and replied politely the event that had happened with the falling over and also hello im gay so back the fuck off im not interested in person A. Said messenger soon backed off and that was it. Thankfully i didnt see said messenger rest of the event. But anyway there was no need for that. What happened was a laugh between two friends nothing more nothing less.

Event ends and everyone goes their own way and back home and funny enough Person B does not really talk to me much after and tbh i didnt care. Yes i get they liked person A but ffs grow up and maybe ask what happened before getting someone else to fight your battles for you. I think it took a few weeks before i heard from them and they were still in a piss when they really had no right to be and left it at that. Move on about 3 months and i knew what was coming and it was the usual messages of ‘’Oh im so sorry for being a tit back then it was so silly of me blah blah blah hope we are ok’’ i explained to person A that i had no bad will towards them at all and its all over and done with and forget it and move on.No problem at all. That was the last time i heard from person A. Going back about 8 months now.....bare that in mind......

Now last November i went to the Netherlands for a gig and to see person B and his new gf who i had got to know over the internet. They had taken me in for a few days and it was lovely before i went to amsterdam. Now when i got back to the uk i did a instagram post saying thank you to my friends for a great time. I was scrolling through fb not even an hour after my post and i saw a shitty post from person A saying ‘’Oh looks like i’ll have to take some people off of my fb as i dont want to see things like that as they hurt’’ and some other bs. I knew instantly this was aimed at me and low and behold the next day after their fb post i was taken off of their instagram. Why you ask? Well because i had had a lovely time with my friend and his new gf!!!. This was now also 6 months after the BS at the said event before as well. FFS get over person B already as its been 6 bloody months and you knew he also had a sodding mrs and no interest in you and you didnt even talk that much. I get it feelings for someone can mean so much but to be so petty against someone else because they hung out with your crush and their new gf is f***ing stupid! So there comes into my rule of if you walk away from me or out of my life in anyway you do not get to see what i am up to anymore so i blocked person A from my instagram after that immature bs and at that time also muted them on fb as i no longer wanted to see the shit they were posting. Xmas and new year comes and goes and no messages. Not a problem i had already moved on with my life.

Same event comes around this year where shit kicked off last year but this year i didnt go. I knew plenty of folk that did and are in the same clicky group and noticed person A was hardly in much pictures which i thought was amusing tbh as they are all such attention seekers. So i went onto Person A’s fb page and saw that i had been removed from their fb page. Fair enough i thought not a problem at at all since it had been 8 months since we talked and they had already walked out in one way so the trash took itself out which was perfect for me. Again i had no problem with this due to their behaviours before hand and also i had moved on so didnt care. So with that and knowing how creepy they are on social media i block them as well. Done and dusted i thought.........

A few weeks ago i suddenly get messages from person A (comes up as unknown number on the app it was on but i knew who it was) asking if i had taken them off of my social media and why. I didnt reply to the message as i feel no explanation is needed for such a thing. Life moves on and people grow apart its pretty normal tbh. So anyway another week goes by and i get another message asking the same thing but this time less jokey about it and more demanding. I ignore and delete the messages again. Another few days goes by and the third message is 1) damn creepy 2) proves my point on how crazy they are. The message basically said person A can see me on another accounts i have and so know i am online still and that they have talked to other people about things and they have said to let it go but they cant do that because they want answers. I literally lol to this message because it was just so needy and whiny but also damn creepy. Ffs who watches someone else from other accounts to see if they get a reaction or not?! Like grow up but the main thing that actually pissed me off about this was the pure nerve this person had to ask for answers when they were the first one to walk away many months back. Now did i go to them asking questions and why? No i did not as i dont care and still dont. Yet here is person A demanding to know why i have blocked them?! F*** right off. Again it comes back to you do not walk out of my life and expect to then keep an eye on me. Thats just all sorts of messed up and their messages just proves how f***ing crazy they are for checking up on me other profiles. If i could find these profiles i would block them too but tbh i dont care. I am happy and living my life. But how f***ing dare anyone demands to know anything from me when they f***ed off first. Not going to happen. I am hoping person A soon gives up and just leaves me alone but time will tell. If i get one more message i will then block them from what app they have contact me on.

You may wonder why i’ve wanted to rant about this and i’ll tell you why. The last few weeks i have got friends who have gone or going through life changing things. One has brain cancer and has maybe 2 years to live,another her ovarian cancer has come back and dont know the full scale yet and another a family member went through something horrific and its made me stop and think about life in general. I knew that life was short after i lost my dad but with all this happening and also more going on its made me think that again and gone bloody hell you never know what will happen to you. It makes you think about the important stuff and things that actually are important and not the BS of social media and things like that. I want my life to be filled with good people that are there for me and also support and love me for what id do. Not whiny pathetic people that moan about sweet f*** all when they should be more thankful for what they do have. I dont have time for people that have no positive effect on my life anymore. I wanted to be lifted up not heald back. I want to be pushed forward,not worried about other peoples opinions.

So now i am taking time out from a things again for my well being and looking forward to the future :-D

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kennethherrerablog · 5 years

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How to Save More Money with Sinking Funds

**This post updated on February 21st, 2019

Organizing your money is right up there with a kick in the face with a golf shoe. No one has the time or even the desire to do such a crazy thing. But, what if I were to explain to you not only how easy it is, but also how it creates success within your financial plan. There are two words that will make your money and your life so much easier. Are you ready for this? SINKING FUNDS. Wow! Now don’t you feel better already?

What is a sinking fund?

A sinking fund is a really fancy shmancy term for a savings account that is earmarked for something you are saving up for. How many of you have gone on vacation and the vacation follows you home in the form of payments? How many of you go into panic mode every Friday after Thanksgiving because you just realized Christmas, or any holiday for that matter, is coming up? Have you ever wondered what is was like to have cash sitting around for the one thing you completely forgot to budget for? We have all been there and it reminds us again how much we can’t stand managing our money!

The joy of a week-long San Diego vacation comes to a screeching halt when you realize you are going to be paying for it….and paying for it….and paying for it. Christmas starts to rob money from your mortgage and utility payments, and then has the nerve to steal the joy out of the season. You start to tell your kids to stop making so many friends in school because you can’t stand the thought of buying another birthday gift. The soccer coach calls to tell you how awesome your kid is at soccer….and that awesomeness comes with a $2,500 price tag due in full next week for an upcoming travel game. Oh, and the hot girl calls and wants to meet up with you in Vegas but you don’t know how much of that general savings account is earmarked for hot girls and Vegas. Sinking Funds will help you with all of these feelings.

We have 10 sinking funds! Each fund has a “nickname” and here are a few of them to give you and idea:

Vacation Fund

Christmas Fund

House Repair Fund

Insurance Fund

Tax Fund

New Car Fund

I don’t know what it is but I want it Fund

Emergency Fund

Open Your Sinking Funds Today

The #1 place to open a sinking fund is at CIT Bank. They offer a low minimum of $100 and a high interest rate of 1.55%. This means that your money will add up fast!

Open an Account

Every pay period, we deposit a little bit of money into each one. We may deposit $100/month into the Christmas Fund and $50/month into the House Repair Fund. Every Christmas we have $1,200 to start off with and every time I need to go out and get this or that for the house, I don’t have to destroy my budget that I’ve worked so hard on. These accounts start to grow and over time you start to laugh because you realize that you actually have that one thing other people seem to always have. You have pictures of Jackson, Grant, and good ol’ Ben Franklin hanging out together in your sinking funds! Those things you once dreaded are now what you wanted them to be – FUN.

So Peach, where do you get these sweet sounding sinking funds? I would highly recommend using CIT Bank. They offer higher interest rates versus a traditional bank. When you setup your account, you can link them to your checking account that you use everyday. For example, if you use a credit union in your neighborhood, you can link your credit union to your new savings account and then set up automatic transfers to build up your sinking fund. If you have direct deposit through your employer, you can set that up and have your sinking fund grow straight out of your paycheck! It is so easy that I truly believe a cave man could actually do it.

Now, what if you need to get money out of your sinking funds. There are 2 ways to do so:

Transfer from your sinking fund to your everyday checking account – takes 2 business days via the Automatic Clearing House referred to as an ACH Transfer

You can set up a checking account at the online bank and INSTANTLY transfer the money from your sinking fund to your online checking account and have check writing privileges or ATM withdrawals

There are a few things I will tell you so you don’t get mad at me. The first thing is savings accounts charge you a fee if you pull money out the account more than 6 times in a month. However, if you had 10 sinking funds, this means you can pull money up to 6 times a month from each account. I suggest that at Christmas time, you transfer all of your Christmas money to your Checking account one time and then you can avoid the fee. Also, when you transfer money from your everyday checking account at your local bank or credit union, it will take 2 business days to get to the online bank. This doesn’t mean it is “lost” for those 2 days, it just doesn’t actually leave your neighborhood bank and enter your sinking fund until 2 business days after you hit submit. Lastly, when you send money from your neighborhood bank to the online bank, your deposits are not available for withdrawal until 5 business days later.

I once felt like we had a pot of money that we just called savings. This money had a little emergency fund in it, a little vacation savings in it, and a teeny tiny bit of Christmas in it. It was disorganized and we couldn’t tell you how much of the pot was for each of the things we were trying to save for. Our money-saving plan looked similar to a giant pile of crap. It stunk! Today, we have MONEY for things that are coming up and life is….richer.

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The idea of Sinking Funds was featured on KTVK Channel 3 in Phoenix, AZ after this post was published

Here are some ideas for your sinking funds:

Christmas

Vacation

Birthdays & Gifts

New Car/Car Repair

Home Repairs

Emergency Fund

Taxes – Income and Property

Car Registration

Plastic Surgery

School Clothes / School Supplies

That thing you really really want

Insurance Premium Fund – often you can save money by paying your premium once a year versus each month

Medical Co-Pay Fund

That other thing you wanted

Lastly, I hope that I am providing you with content that is helpful to you and your bank account. It would mean a lot to me if you could leave me a comment telling me what you like and dislike – both are equally important to me. Also, don’t forget to subscribe to the Money Peach Blog below to receive exclusive tips on your money, and other extras that you won’t find in the blog posts!

Be good to yourself, your friends, your love, and BE GOOD TO YOUR MONEY!

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theliterateape · 5 years

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Almost Had to Say Goodbye

By J. L. Thurston

December 21st, OSF St. Joseph

Talking to Mom through a visage of IV tubes as I sit next to her bed. I’m still getting used to seeing her without her teeth. She’s tired. A week in the hospital will do that to a person. A week without the comforts of home, the freedoms, the cats. She’s been nearly bed ridden, which is good for the diabetic issues of her feet. This time last week she was preparing to get her teeth pulled for dentures. Then she couldn’t stop bleeding.

Monday morning my dad called me. Five in the morning, but I was awake. Yoga before the kiddos get out of bed.

“Jen,” he said, trying to sound normal but I can hear the strain. “Can you come over for your mom?”

I was there in twenty minutes. Mom sat in the recliner, talking like normal, but she was only in a robe, blood splattered on the floor from her gums. She complained about the blood in her hair until the chest pains began.

We couldn’t get her out of the chair, she was so weak. I called 911. The ambulance took her to the tiny ER ten minutes away. It was then discovered that she had lost half the blood in her body. Once she was shipped to St. Joe’s, it was discovered that the stress on her body had caused her to suffer two heart attacks.

It’s Friday, and she’s in surgery. Open heart, quadruple bypass. Dad and I are sitting in the surgical waiting room. It’s nice here, wide open but still cozy. There’s coffee and tea. Dad keeps embibing caffeine, and his legs haven’t stopped bouncing. He’s paced between our seats and the update screen close to thirty times. I can hardly write because we can’t stop chattering. Time is moving far too slowly.

I’m tired from the week of seeing mom in the hospital. But Dad is so far beyond tired he’s somewhere on the other side. He’s been scared shitless since Monday. Doing nothing but working and driving to and from the hospital. I think he’s had a collective five hours of sleep this week. His eyes are round, nervous, picturing life without Mom.

I can’t lie, I’ve been doing the same. We were told on Wednesday that she’d need a quadruple bypass. I work in a hospital, and very little ruffles me. But when it’s your mom stuck in that bed, connected to four IVs, monitored every hour, preparing for open heart surgery, I gotta say. I’m ruffled.

I remember the people I know who have lost someone around the Holidays. It makes things much worse, for some reason. I think about how I would handle opening presents from her if she was gone. The gifts I got her, where would they go? Are funeral homes open on Christmas? How would I explain to my three year old that her Grams is never coming home from the hospital?

I’m being quite melodramatic, I know. Many people go through quadruple bypass and are all the better for it. But they aren’t my Mom. She has weird reactions to medications, she has a complicated medical history, she’s not as strong as she used to be.

And she’s my mom.

She’s more than that, too. She’s my truest friend. Through it all, from day one, she’s supported me. She’s there for me when I don’t want to be alone, she stays away when I need her to. Her door is always open to everyone in need, even if they don’t know it. She feeds all mouths who are hungry, even if it means she has to go without. I’ve never seen her turn away a single problem, and helping down-and-outs gives her unending joy.

I simply cannot picture a world where my mom doesn’t exist. Will I enter 2019 without her?

I had been writing a piece for Literate Ape about how New Years resolutions are complete bullshit and my utter disdain for making promises to oneself that one will just forget in a month or so. But I tossed it. In the light of recent events, the piece is tacky and negative. I don’t care about much right now except my mom making it through surgery and my dad keeping it together.

Worrying does nothing. Instead of wringing my hands while I sit here with Dad, I put my computer in my lap and started typing. Dad is playing on his iPad, laughing at 9Gag, shrugging his shoulders at all the well-wishers blowing up our phones.

We have no news yet. This is what Limbo feels like.

December 26th, my writing room

Home already!

I can’t believe all that has transpired since last weekend. Watching my mother brush shoulders with Death and then turn around and be discharged home three days after open heart surgery. I’m exhausted and exhilarated.

I haven’t seen her since Sunday night. It was the first night she could actually carry a conversation with me. I washed her hair, braided it, and helped her feel less rough around the edges.

We were prepared to spend Christmas in the ICU, to bring in gifts, make the best of it. But she wasn’t having it. “It just won’t feel like Christmas,” she said.

Besides extra scars on her thighs where the doctor borrowed some veins, and a new scar down her sternum, she’s as good as new. Probably even better. It’s not the Christmas wish I thought I’d ask for, but I’m eternally grateful I got it.

I almost spent this Christmas without my mother. I almost had to explain a terrible loss to my child. I don’t know what I’d do without Mom, and I’m thanking God and all my lucky stars I don’t have to find out yet.

#Health #Christmas #Hospital #Grateful #Mom #Death #ICU #Heart Attack

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clearsandwicheagle-blog · 6 years

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