#i was messing with colors but i don’t like this gifset anymore

[nincompoopydoo]

DEBRIS AND MISERY

DOUBT MAKES THE STRONG WEAK ; PART 8 / ?

PAIRING: Loki Laufeyson x Female!Reader WORD COUNT: 3.5k SUMMARY: From concussions to destruction, you find yourself developing an odd trust in the last two people you would even begin to have faith in and when the apocalypse seems unavoidable, you discover that there may be more to the mystery of the universe. A/N: Well, this chapter is long. And mainly pertains around the theme of 'doubt'. A lot more of Sylvie stuff and Loki just having heart eyes the whole time. I love this chapter and I can’t wait to write more as the story ends. Please tell me what you love, hate, anything (maybe theories lol). Thank you for showing so much love. gif from this gifset by @kamalaskhans WARNINGS: Swearing. Apocalypse. Injuries. Blood. support my writing through ko-fi💖 MASTERPOST ; MASTERLIST

You were once a fighter.

Hunter E-87 was the name you once knew, hollered through different fields and dimensions in time and space. You fought for what you thought was right, pledging allegiance to a cosmic establishment that held all power to a single timeline and never questioned the works of the Time-Keepers. The Sacred Timeline is indeed sacrosanct, too important, too valuable to interfere. You fight in the name of the single thread of time, the bark of a tree, forbidden to bare branches of a potential multiverse. You fight because the thought of alternate timelines used to scare you. Yet, if alternate universes were meant to be, the lives you took and destroyed are now in the grasp of your bloody hands. You hold the responsibility of the death of the innocent, taking part in mass genocide.

But promises must be kept.

The thought constantly haunts you in your sleep. You have dreams of death, war, destruction, and famine from across the universe. People seem to glide like specters in the world built by your imagination and mind. You have seen a lot, more than any being in the universe should, but no one talks about the aftermath of witnessing the tragedy of the universe as time goes on and on. No one talks about what it does to the mind. Music from cassettes and the wonder of human space exploration were distractions to cope with the grinding hole in you and the fact you might be turning truly crazy.

Sometimes, you would like to be human—Fewer problems and less time to live.

You blame the sickening and bizarre vivid images that come and go whenever you close your eyes as a symptom of being a hunter. The others are stronger than you. Well, they act like they are. Becoming an analyst made you sleep better but there was always doubt. Sakaar made you doubt.

Doubt makes the strong weak. Doubt makes you weak.

“You startin’ to have doubts?”

Green eyes. They watch you with curiosity with a hint of amusement. You hear yourself hum. “Would it be bad if I said yes?”

He laughs. It’s mighty. “Yeah. Definitely bad.”

A beat of silence. You feel your eyes start to sting. “I couldn’t even tell my mom.” A laugh escapes your lips despite the hurt you feel in your chest. “Did you tell anyone? Your wife?”

You see him now, blonde hair slicked back and deep-set eyes. He shakes his head. “Nope. Not even my wife.”

“She’ll be proud, you know.”

“I know...So will your mom. Jesus, you’re gonna be the first woman on—”

Wake up.

“—Is she dead?”

The voice is familiar. It pulls you back to reality but right now, your eyes are too heavy. Doubt is the first emotion that waves through your brain before the process of pain can even occur—uncertain if you are dead or alive.

You can’t feel your limbs, they are too weak.

Doubt makes the strong weak. Doubt makes you weak.

Maybe, you are dead.

“This is your fault! You’re the one who swung that sword of yours to her head! You’re careless—”

Sword...Sword...Careless? You remember a train, a fight.

“Oh, I’m the one who’s careless? You’re the one who’s drunk!”

Drunk...Who was drunk?

Then, your voice echoes in your head, images of a certain brunette with a deep frown. He called you a mewling quim. You quoted Hávamál. You then left him and wandered through the other cabins of the train. He blew his cover. He got you into a fight.

Loki. Loki Laufeyson.

Son of a bitch.

Your eyes are wide open now. All you see are the faces of Loki and Sylvie, looming over you. Just two floating heads. Then, the pain arrives, coursing through the entire back of your head. You wince in immediate reaction and the floating heads turn to you in an instant.

What a way to wake up from a concussion.

You remember everything now, but you certainly don’t recall being on the outside of the train. Must have gotten thrown out. The thought angers you, irritation practically boiling to the brim. Yet, it’s your fault. You hadn't thought to babysit the very person you wish were dead. As your palm grips onto the dirt beneath, muscling all strength left to lift yourself. Your head feels light and heavy all at once. Not good.

“Are you alright?” is the question that flies from Loki’s lips, tinged with an emotion you never knew he had for another but himself—worry. Whether selfless or selfish, you wish to ignore the complexity of Loki’s reactions and possible change in character, especially towards you. Ever since you stepped foot on Lamentis, all you felt was pain. You have never been injured so much within the last few hours than in your entire life and weirdly, you feel fine.

Sylvie is quick to stand, watching the two of you work in tandem. His grip finds the curve of your shoulders as you stick your hand out to grip him by the bicep. At your touch, you notice how his arm stiffens ever so slightly. You don’t say anything.

Some things about Loki are best left unknown and unanswered.

Today is filled with a lot of getting off the ground in the most unceremonious way possible.

A deep exhale leaves your lips, wisps of your hair drifting with the brutal breeze from your nostrils. Beads of sweat trail along the curve of your forehead and the back of your neck. Some entangled with the strands of your hair. Your hands feel clammy and dirty but you run them to push your hair back and away from your face anyway.

“I’m fine,” you mumble, pulling yourself away from his touch.

You finally get a good look at the two. Loki looks like complete shit but Sylvie manages to maintain the regalness to the locks of her hair despite her opposing overall behavior. It’s the Asgardian blood coursing through her veins. You cannot hide your ancestors' blood. It’s hard to believe the two are the same—one being. Yet, it's believable when you’re angry at the two of them.

The two messed up your career, that’s why.

Unbothered and uncivilized. It’s a miracle you’re still alive.

As your eyes shift along the train tracks that meander along a gorge with steep rocky walls that leer above it, you catch sight of a spark by your feet, glinting under the iridescent sky.

It’s the TemPad, shattered into pieces; you recognize the color gold of its border.

Your eyes grow wide, mouth agape. You don’t even feel angry anymore, it’s more than that. You stick out your hand to gesture towards the destroyed device, “Is that—Is that the TemPad?” you ask as your other hand lifts to hold the side of your head. “Or am I just seeing things from the concussion?”

Sylvie is the one to speak. “It’s not the concussion.”

You suddenly feel like you’re burning.

If it were possible, you could have instantly killed him with a look.

“You. You killed us!” you step closer to him and for a moment, Loki doesn’t exactly know what to do. “So, it’s my fault then? You were the one who left me alone in the lounge.” are the words that leave his lips. Completely useless. Trying to diffuse the tension is the exact opposite of what he does.

His silver tongue isn’t so shiny and silver anymore.

You don’t pull your blow this time. Your palm strikes his cheek, rocking his head to the side. Your hand is oddly soft. Loki winces and you stand your ground. “You’re a jerk and an asshole. You’ve probably been called that for all your life and yet, here you are. Still, the most insensitive and pathetic man I’ve ever met,” you articulate your words with frustration and rage. You don’t raise your voice like before, it’s low and frightfully intimidating. “And I’m not your babysitter.”

—

Battles, ruination, and fracas gave a sense of familiarity to Sylvie in a time of an impending apocalypse. When worlds end, benevolence is resolute. The tragedy of the end of lost souls—afraid to die. But as daunting as the apocalypse is, the beauty of their souls finally returning to the universe protrudes amongst the debris and misery.

She sees herself in the two of you, as much as she doesn’t identify as a Loki anymore, and her hatred towards the TVA. You have a temper and he doesn’t know how to keep his mouth shut.

You’re mysterious in an almost enchanting way and possibly significant as you seemed to be at first glance. Sylvie is highly curious about you.

You don’t stray too far from the group, only to find rest by the edge of a pit made by a crashing meteor. You sit with your back turned against the very two beings you distrust as you watch the border where the bustling city of Shuroo is based. Your guard is down and you don’t care at this point. Everyone is about to die anyway.

Sylvie’s gaze finds Loki who seems to be only watching the back of your still figure, eyes glinting with an emotion unknown to her. Possibly regret? Sylvie doesn’t know what regret looks like. But fear and anger, she feels it radiating from you. She knows it. Something tells her you’re not solely angry at her and Loki.

She finds herself drifting closer to you. You don’t move. She cautiously settles beside you. “You’re not hiding a knife somewhere, aren’t you?”

You merely scoff, caressing your head, “You’re the one to say.”

Sylvie blinks. Fair enough.

Silence. Sylvie’s eyes shift to the handkerchief tied around your arm, stained with blood. “How’s the arm?”

You hum. “Surprisingly, fine.”

Oh, Sylvie knows it’s fine. She knows what Loki did. She decides not to mention the scratch she made across your cheek.

“Did the slap make you feel better?”

The question is hinted at near sarcasm, but genuinely, she wants to know.

“Yes, it did. You should try it sometime.”

She simply hums. “I would have but you beat me to it.”

A turn of your lips as they curve into a small smile. Sylvie watches with an odd sense of satisfaction. “You know, I’m still mad at you. For what you did to me.” Your words are slow. You find yourself swallowing. “But it’s nothing compared to what the TVA did to you.”

Empathy. Is this what empathy feels like? The moment when someone finally understands what it’s like to be alone for so long. Your lives are different but they reflect in certain ways. You have had your fair share of living in constant fear and constantly running. Sylvie finds herself wanting to tell you that she hadn’t simply pushed you into Sakaar. When it’s a mission, things are never accidental. She always has a plan.

Yet, she chooses not to say anything.

You speak again but merely whisper, fidgeting with your fingers, “Before Sakaar—did you enchant me?”

It's as if you're reading her mind.

“Are you seeing things?”

After a pause, the fidgeting stops.

“I’ve seen things all my life, images. Brief and insignificant. But ever since I was in Sakaar, it’s gotten a lot harder to differentiate a dream and a memory.”

“That’s because they aren’t dreams.”

Your hardened gaze finds hers for a brief moment, nearly growing wide at her words but in an instant, your guard is up once you hear the shuffling of feet behind you where Loki lingers. The subject is dropped immediately. He meets Sylvie’s gaze, the two share a knowing look.

Your anger is provoked and well deserved and yet, the last thing he wants is to be your enemy. Loki doesn’t know why. He has lived a life full of them.

You’re different.

He stills, wondering if you’re going to lash out at him again but when he notices your slow breaths, he decides to sit next to you anyway, awkward glances to you in his periphery. A deep sigh escapes his lips, fiddling with his fingers. “What now?”

Sylvie is the one to answer. “I don’t know. You broke the TemPad.”

“Well—”

“And that planet is about to crash into us.”

Loki looks up at the nearing planet of Lamentis. He blinks. “Well, yes, but—”

“Yes, but what?”

“Well, the entire moon is destroyed, right?”

Sylvie is trying to suppress your growing annoyance. “Yep. And everyone on it is killed.”

But Loki pesters on. “Including us.”

She raises her voice. “Yes, including us.” Loki glances at you momentarily. A pause. He furrows his brows in thought.

“What about the ark?”

“The ark never leaves because it's destroyed.”

Suddenly, an epiphany, his eyes light up. He turns to you and Sylvie, “Never had us on it.”

You suddenly scoff at his words. “Are you suggesting we hijack the ark and make sure it gets off this moon?” You turn to him to only spot a vague smile playing upon his lips. He nods in return. “Sounds like a good idea to me, Agent.”

You merely blink, watching the way his eyes shift across your face. First, you’re struck with uncertainty. It’s a risk, a huge one but you know, risks are meant to be uncertain. Risks are also vital in success. Hesitation, doubt—they make you weak. This time, you want to be strong. Strong enough for one last push to save your life.

“Okay.” is what you say, your expression reflecting his.

For the first time, since he took your hand in Sakaar, you’re starting to trust him.

—

The walk to Shuroo seemed endless. You trail behind the two, feeling like you’re about to suffocate.

“—To preserve the connection, I have to create a fantasy from their memories.”

Loki and Sylvie had been conversing about the science and functions of enchantment in a rather surprisingly calm manner. Loki hums, amused by her elucidation. “And you call me a magician.”

Her expression is unchanged as she continues to trudge alongside Loki, ignoring his previous statement. “That young soldier from the TVA, her mind was messed up. Everything clouded. I had to pull a memory from hundreds of years prior...before she even fought for them.”

Loki halts abruptly in his step, hand flying to grab Sylvie’s arm. “What? What'd you say? Before she joined the TVA?”

Sylvie blinks. “Yeah. She was just a regular person on Earth.”

His mind starts to reel, face muddled with confusion. “I was told that everyone who works for the TVA was created by the Time-Keepers.”

“That's ridiculous. They're all variants, just like us. Including her.” Sylvie gestures discreetly to you who has stopped to take a breather, hands on your hips as you blink up to the sky.

You, Mobius, all of them. All variants.

“They don't know that. She doesn’t know that.” he breathes a terrified expression.

Sylvie looks at you from afar. You’re now looking at them with a bewildered expression. “What?” you call out, voice echoing through the wide area, in a somewhat defensive tone.

She turns to Loki once more, voice nearly faltering. “I have a feeling she already knows it.”

—

Loki doesn’t realize the unfamiliarity of hopelessness. Throughout his life, he was constantly surrounded by those with unfaltering determination—His brother, family, friends who were warriors, The Avengers.

Never was it known that he would see it burning in your eyes as they reflect the growing fire of the Ark, crumbling down, tongues of fire engulfing it whole before you. His heart burns with it as Shuroo falls quiet—only the sounds of the metallic crashing of the disintegrating parts of the ship falling from above and the screams of the rich and deemed worthy to live. Every Lamentian still alive held their breath, a moment's silence for their lives must end. Everything must end.

So close yet so far.

Sylvie is gone by the minute as the city starts to descend in terror and panic. He stands behind your still form, just watching your only chance of making it out, swallowed by its own billowing smoke. He reaches out for you, tugging you by the sleeve. “We should leave,” he says with a sudden sense to protect you. There isn’t much to do at this point. It doesn't matter if you are hit by the falling pieces of the Ark because you are all going to die anyway.

But he considers it a gesture, as insignificant and small it is. The least he could do is to distract you from the end, whether for a mere second or minutes.

“I know things haven’t been the best between us and I concede I bring out the worst in you, but I wanted to say I’m sorry.”

You turn to Loki with his sudden words. He watches the way your expression softens so gracefully, face adorned with gashes and wounds. Your mouth twitches as you respond with a gentle voice. “I forgive you.”

Three words. Very powerful words.

His heart skips a beat.

You find Sylvie at the brink of the city, sitting on a stretched slab of rock amongst the dirt, watching the horizon where the planet starts to meet the moon. Loki still has his hand around your arm, but you don’t complain. It’s your only source of support at the moment. It’s an unconscious move, but everything about it feels right when the two of you settle beside her, shoulders brushing against each other. It only makes sense to want to feel the nearness, the closeness of another as the light at the end of the tunnel begins to dim.

It’s impending. It’s scary.

“I remember Asgard.”

Sylvie’s voice trembles, her eyes are somber.

“Not much, but I remember. My home, my people, my life. Then, the TVA showed up, erased my reality, and took me, prisoner. I was just a child.”

You turn to her, guilt bubbling in your chest, but you don’t say anything. You let her speak. It’s only right.

“I escaped.” she breathes, blinking the brimming tears in her eyes away. ”Stole a TemPad and I ran for a long, long time, which really sucked. Everywhere and every-when I went, it caused a Nexus event.”

Sylvie turns to you with a melancholic gaze. “The universe wants to break free, so it manifests chaos. Like me being born the Goddess of Mischief. But to you and the TVA, I’m not supposed to exist.”

For so long, you hadn’t realized the consequences of your work at the TVA. You believed you were right. That erasing, resetting realities were meant to be. You cannot comprehend how it only occurred to you to question the authority of the Time-Keepers over time itself after Sakaar. All those years of being ignorant and selfish. You hadn’t realized. You never did.

But now you know.

Sylvie continues, gaze shifting away from you. “I figured out where to hide. And so that's where I grew up, the ends of a thousand worlds. Now...that's where I'll die.���

Then, silence. It sits heavily between the three of you.

“The universe—isn’t she beautiful?” Your voice is soft, eyes trained on the horizon—a fleet of asteroids, they reflect the end. But they seem to dance to the silence of the apocalypse, drifting across the stratosphere, lining the firmament. Loki’s gaze shifts to you, training on every curve of your face and the tears slipping down your cheeks. He agrees, the universe is beautiful.

You’re beautiful.

“She brings turmoil, agony, and destruction but in all her flaws, there’s beauty in her very existence.”

Your hands find Sylvie and Loki’s hands, holding on to them tightly as you fight the wavering of your voice.

“You...Both of you might be the epitome of chaos but you must know that you have such beautiful souls. All of us, we're her children...and if she is beautiful, so are we. And the Universe is always right. If she created you then we are wrong.”

Sylvie’s face is soft. Loki squeezes your hand.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry for everything. I should have known from the start...that the TVA was lying to all of us. I should have questioned. I should have doubted—”

“It’s okay. It’s not your fault,” she says, smiling with saddened eyes.

You laugh. You don’t know why, but you do. Maybe, it’s because you know you are a part of the problem anyway, even if you were just doing your job.

You find Loki’s gaze that’s already on you. You sigh and speak through a whisper. “I’m sorry for slapping you.”

His lips curve into a grin, eyes crinkling like your own. “It was well deserved, but I forgive you.”

Fingers entangled with the hands of two unlikely people, you finally realize what it truly feels like to not be alone. To be in the company of someone you want to be with.

“Now long now.” Those three words leave the very lips of Sylvie and your chest feels like it’s about to collapse.

You never knew you were afraid of death, yet here you are—terrified.

The ground shakes beneath you. It’s dark and there’s fire everywhere. A meteor collides to the ground just across the way, it sends smoke billowing to its surroundings faster than you can blink.

Even in the last seconds of your life, you have doubts remaining. What if the universe isn’t always right?

Then, through the growing dust, you see a spark, like lightning. A glint of a figure, standing before you. White, pure, and serene. You’re standing now, staring ahead. Sylvie and Loki cease to exist in your mind as they gaze at you with bewilderment. They anxiously call you by your name but you don’t hear it. There’s only silence now, you don’t hear anything but the ringing in your ears.

A voice, she speaks with dignity. A voice so familiar.

“Doubt makes the strong weak, my child.”

Then, you hear it. A soft hum—a Time Door glows warmth amid your impending death.

Suddenly, she’s gone.

TAGLIST:

@lareinedususpense

@poubxlle

@mystoragehatesme

@the-maroon-panda

@kashasenpai

@nyxrae

@johnmurphys-sass

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[jovalencia]

we all knew this was coming and I’m a sentimental bitch. I just wanted to write all my mutuals some little messages about how much I love you. you guys have changed my life and I am so grateful for each and every one of you!!!💕💞💓💗💖💘 anygays have fun searching for yourself in this mess and I’m sorry for any typos, I’m illiterate (and if i forgot you it’s because i lost my brain in 1912)

@cr1spyy fernanda, my first ever mutual. who would have thought that your 5th wave posts would have brought one of the most amazing people in my life to me. your posts always make me laugh and your dedication to the good morning asks is admirable (fr I could never have that much consistency) you’re so kind to everybody and you’re absolutely beautiful and incredible and I fucking love you so much. I honestly don’t even want to think about what my life would be like if I had never met you, MWAH💕🤍

@sundaymorninghangover I remember you being my first ever note!! you liked this post I made that was a reblog of a “uquiz” that was actually a rickroll lmao. you didn’t even follow me back then but whatever. Then I remember waking up one day to see that you had tagged me in a bingo ask game and I was like “ummm tf is an ask game” but I do still have a bingo card for it that I never used ekenksjs. anygays, you have good opinions on everything and you’re absolutely fucking hilarious. If you told me back in may that I would be friends with you I wouldn’t believe it bc you intimidated me but regardless I’m glad to be an arson gang member with you. your memes are god tier and so is your music taste. I love you whore!!!!!🖤💜

@sound-and-colors ma’am you’re so nice and for what??? the aesthetic stuff that you reblog is *chef’s kiss* and nobody else is out there doing it like you. we’ve never talked but I just know that you are absolutely incredible mwah❤️💛

@embeddedinmybrain tasfia you are the nicest person on his hellsite and you know it (I hope). It was so much fun being your secret admirer anon while it lasted, like fr I loved it. Your art is beautiful just like your heart and i honestly don’t know what I did to deserve such a kind soul like you in my life. You’re always there to hype me up and ily (also just cut your own hair already I believe in you)🤍💙

@gumptin you hooked me with your suus icon and reeled me in by being the coolest and funniest person ever. your posts are consistently hilarious, accurate, or relatable and I admire that. I mean it when I say you’re one of the coolest people on here. idk what I did to have you think I’m cool but I’m honored nonetheless. also you have really awesome style and hair jdnjdjdjd mwah💚💛

@nori-in-pink first and foremost, your blog always has a very nice aesthetic and I feel like I need to acknowledge that. anyway, you are so kind and supportive and you don’t take any bullshit and that is absolutely amazing. you are absolutely iconic and always reblog the best stuff so I know I can count on your blog to be fantastic. you used to scare me (idk why don’t ask) but now I know that you’re just a big teddy bear ily💗💜

@matteohnora my slurpee queen and my mememate!! you always send me the funniest shit and it doesn’t go unappreciated. You’re always there for me with a silly meme or emotional support and I don’t think I’ve ever told you how grateful I am for that. whenever you stalk my blog it makes my heart go whooosh and I feel so special. Ily and I am so glad to have met you💜❤️

@lieverobbe ah yes, the girl with the impeccable music taste. that’s what I know you as, oh well. you are more talented and kind than you could ever believe and your edits are amazing!!! whenever I see you on my dash I get all happy bc I’m like “em’s here!!!” I love all your lil posts and I am so glad that you are my mutual ilyyyyy💙🤍

@ironymane you’ve watched limitless which automatically makes you amazing. you’re an absolutely incredible and amazing person and even tho you aren’t on here as much anymore, I still love youre lil posts. And one time you kept me entertained on a 6hr car ride so you deserve some kind of award for that. ly🧡💛

@kingarthurpendragons okay the obvious thing to talk about here is your incredible talent when it comes to gif making. Like how in the hell- but you are also so kind and loving and it doesn’t go unnoticed. You don’t have to send nice asks but you do and ily for it mwah!!❤️💗

@engelkeijsers the skam nl stan that we all deserve to have in our lives. you are so fucking hilarious and relatable and all around amazing and for what? your posts always put a smile on my face and it is so much fun to clown with you. ilyyyy💚💛

@happiness-isin-you let’s ignore the fact that it took me forever to realize that this was your main lmao. your art is some of the most beautiful shit I’ve ever seen. like your style is so cool????  I could literally go on about this for hours don’t test me. the cute animal pictures are the absolute best and you’re always there for emotional support. Ilyyyyyyy💛❤️

@isakyaqi fiz you are so kind and talented and cool and I really do mean all that. You reblog always the best of content so I know I can trust it. you always put nice tags in the things you reblog things and it’s fun to read what you write because it’s almost always you hyping up the creator or the thing itself. you are awesome jdjdjdndjjd mwah🖤🤎

@cash-queens sam oh sam. Idek where to start with how much ily. You’re my famous mutual which is very iconic of you and you put up with my cat pictures and my silly antics and my riverdale posts. You’re so kind to me and everybody and whenever I make a post when I’m having a mental breakdown you’re always there to make sure that I’m doing okay. That def doesn’t go unappreciated. You’re legitimately one of the kindest and most amazing people I’ve ever known and I love you so much, more than you could ever know💛🤍

@welcometo-saturn çağrı you’re so cool. end of statement. that’s all I have to say about it. your gifs are so beautiful and you don’t take shit from anybody. you’re so down to earth that it makes it seem like you’re somebody who I’ve just always known (even tho we’ve never talked sjdjdjdjdj) so yeah anyway, you’re are a really awesome person with really good opinions and I am so glad that we are mutuals🧡❤️

@amifeelingokay it’s difficult not to start with your url bc it’s amazing and I love it. your skam posts are always so nice and cute and positive (just like you!!) and I love them. the content you reblog is always aesthetic or a nice text post and I just love your blog okay. ily💜🖤

@isthatelpome you’re so nice that I’m willing to overlook your opinion on salt and vinegar chips (they’re not good I’ll fight you on that) your dani icon is beautiful just as you are, mwahhhh🧡❤️

@earthling-isa babe you are so cute with your lil edits and your clowning. the near constant black and white aesthetic is very iconic and i love it. you’re a suus stan so I have no choice but to love you for it. i absolutely adore your gifs, especially the ones with the lil squares in the middle fygzbgut. you are absolutely beautiful and incredible and kind and I love you MWAHHHH🖤💙

@grey-mist-exist okay we’ve never talked but you seem like such a rad person. not cool but like rad (there are are subtle differences) your art is beautiful even tho idk the quotes (go off smarty pants) and overall you are just really rad, idk how else to say it mwah!!!🤍🖤<pretend it’s a grey heart

@fatoudixon hey look it’s one of the most talented people here!!! You’ve always been so kind and supportive of me and I really really do appreciate it. you have good opinions on everything and did I mention that you’re talented?? cause you are, very. Your reaction videos are amazing and not to mention iconic, just like your hair. anyway, ily and I am so glad that I have somebody as amazing as you as my mutual💙💛

@sander-klaas you are so kind and and you have so much passion. I can always trust you reblog only the best of wtfock and sobbe content which I am very grateful for. you literally just started making gifs and they are so beautiful (okay it was like months ago but whatever dkdjdjjdjdj) anyway, thank you so much for being my mutual mwah❤️💛

@jusdekiwi okay we’ve never talked but you genuinely seem like such a sweet person??? I love the stuff you reblog, it’s always the best gif sets. idk I can just tell you have good taste. I hope to get to know you better in the future, but for now I am very grateful to have you💚💙

@kritiquer my twin!!! you and I have a lot in common so ofc I love you. I’m joking obviously.... anygays you are always so supportive of everybody and you are so sweet. I love all of your personal posts, it always makes me really happy to see what you’re up to and how you’re feeling. I also like the aesthetic stuff you reblog, I have bad taste in all that, clearly you don’t. I am so glad that we started talking and I hope that we continue! ily kit!!!!💜🤍

@bleachblondebitches you aren’t on here that much, but whenever you are I get so happy! Your gifs are beautiful and I think about your sobbe and booksmart parallels gifset every day. you have amazing taste in movies and I love you!💜💙

@lesbeanfatou clara!!! bitch!!!! You already know how much I love you but I guess I’ll reiterate. I honestly don’t know what I did before I knew you. I always remember looking at the no idea blog with the Nora icons like “who is this?” Little did I know back then that you would be one of my closest friends. your support of me means the world and I am so grateful for you. I’m so glad that I have somebody in my life like you to talk to and be friends with. you are one of the funniest people in and I just love you so much I could burst mwah❤️🧡

@gucciboner okay hiii ypu are literally so fucking kind and funny, i admire your sense of humor sm. your art is so beautiful and you are so goddamn talented, it never ceases to amaze me. I also love all the little funny posts you make and reblog!! ily💙💗

@helmtaryn even though you put supernatural on my dash, I am willing to forgive you bc I love you so much. your gifs are so beautiful like ma’am didn’t you just start?? icon shit. your hate for photoshop is iconic and you are awesome. you’re always sending me asks and responding to my posts and you’re so nice and it makes my heart go whooosh. anygays you’re cool and ily💙🧡

@starmansander nina when I tell you that you give off the best vibes- okay sorry I had to start with that. I love how you are so nice and supportive of me, it really means a lot. I really like the stuff you reblog like,,, cool art? pretty women? those hopeful little posts? iconic. also youre a noor stan which is a sign of good taste. love you🤎❤️

@ijzermanora daniiiiiii madam you are so epic and iconic and I really could go on about that forever. you are so kind and you’re following all my joke sideblogs (even the ch*cken l*ttle hate blog??? why???) which is very brave of you. I love reading all of your lil wholesome posts and hearing about school and how much you hate chemistry (even tho you like sushi???) anygays we were already sending memes 10 hours into our mutualship so I think we were soulmates from the very beginning. I love you so much and I have no idea what I did before i knew you💜💗

@alwaysin-myhead okay, you give off cool person vibes and I had to acknowledge that. your art is so beautiful and you are so incredibly talented!!! I hope to get to know you in the future🧡💛

@alexiaugustin here she is!!! the queen of good opinions!!! you are such a smart cookie and you use that power to make long paragraph posts that I can actually read without falling asleep. which is impressive honestly. never has a person been so kind and funny and genius in such a well rounded way (that makes no sense) I’m so happy that I have you in my life ilyyy💚💗

@ijntba hihi you’re such a sweet person and I literally love your skam blog sm. I am so honored that you’re using one of my icons you have no idea. even though I’m confused when you post about anime, I still appreciate your passion lmao. mwah💛🧡

@hidden-joy liz!! you are such a kind soul and I absolutely love looking at the things you reblog and reading all the nice things that you put in the tags, it’s always so sweet and supportive!!! we’re relatively new mutuals, but I do hope to get to know you better in the future!!!💚💛

okay sorry to group y’all together but @fudgetunblr and @alexiswoke I like just became mutuals with y’all but I do love you and I’m glad you’re here and I hope 2021 treats you well and that i get to know you better!!❤️❤️

aaand one last final message for max and sarah, i know yall wont see this but ily🧡 💜

okay yeah I know I already said this but I really do love each and every one of you so much and I am so lucky to have so many amazing people in my life💕💕💓💕💖💖💕💘💕💗💞💓💕💖💖💘💕💓

#MWAH💕 #my mutuals are pretty fuckin rad #also don’t tell anyone but the hearts at the end are the colors I associate you with #or they’re as close as I could get #*makes this post* #*goes back to sleep*

[usersukuna]

ok ok, so, @saltybatman​ asked me how i manage to bring colors out in a gifset without it becoming too grainy or overpowering. and because i love her so much, i made this tutorial for her but i decided to post it because more people asked for a tutorial before, so here we go

i use photoshop cc 2014

for this tutorial you need to know the basics of making gifs

if you have any questions just send me an ask or IM me, you won’t be bothering me (i may take a little while to respond, though)

there are at least 4 methods in this, so enjoy

from:

to:

ok, so, here are a few of my methods

note: i’m gonna add links of the images so you can enlarge them to see better

i’m gonna start with this gif from IT:

so, first of all, i always use my base psd on my gifs, which was based in this tutorial

after adding the base, i adjust it with more layers. like brightness, contrast, color balance etc. but i NEVER change what’s inside the folder of the base.

the gif will look like this:

not much difference, right? right

now, i’m gonna change the color

at first i was going to turn it into blue, but then i tried using color balance and this is what happened (note: i only used the midtone tab):

so i was like “wow, look at this!!”

so i decided to make it purple.

but can you see the pink/red in the background? i only want the purple color, so i need to get rid of that

for that, i’m gonna use hue/saturation

these are my settings:

(the settings in the reds tab)

(and in the magentas tab)

it doesn’t look so red anymore, so it’s great.

now, i want to make the gif a bit more dark and i wanna change the purple a bit so it’ll look like the other gif i made (this one)

my settings in the blacks tab:

and in the blues tab:

and it’s done! now i just need to sharpen it and post! and for that, i always use this sharpening action

then: 

and now:

_____________________ x ____________________

another example of how i made this:

turn into this:

this is a bit of a pain in the ass, tbh. and this worked because the gif was small (so you can’t see much of the details and can’t find errors, per say) and they (the characters) didn’t move so much in this scene, so it was easier to change the colors

as usual, i’ll use my base and adjust it with more layers.

the result:

now i’m gonna change the color, for that, i’m gonna use hue/saturation again, and i’m gonna change the settings of the yellows, greens and cyans tabs

the result:

i don’t want their faces to be affected by the color changes, so i’ll use a layer mask and use the brush tool to paint over their faces and where i think it’s necessary

it’ll look like this now:

but now i need to get rid of the yellows/greens/cyans.

i’ll add another hue/saturation layer and mess with the yellows/greens/cyans tab:

(yellow)

(green)

(cyan)

ok, now it looks a lot better.

but i still want to change it to a more vibrant pink, i’m gonna use the selective color for that.

(reds tab)

(magentas tab)

but i still thinks this isn’t enough, so i’ll add one more selective color layer

(reds tab)

(magentas tab)

ok, now i’m satisfied, hOWEVER, this still looks dark, so i’m gonna have to use A LOT of brightness for this

my settings:

i’m too perfectionist, so i think i should add another layer of selective color and darken it a bit.

(blacks tab)

I KNOW, there’s practically no difference, but my perfectionist ass thinks that there is, so yeah,

and now a tiny little bit more of brightness/contrast:

and it’s finally done, thank god

note: i could’ve added a layer mask over the second layer of the selective color because you can see that ben’s face, mike’s clothes and bev’s hair are way more vibrant than they should be, but when i made this, i didn’t notice much at first. and when i noticed, i was too lazy to fix

________________x________________

for this next example, i’m gonna use a psd from another person, because mine wasn’t working with the scenes and i was getting angry so instead i used the psd

from this:

to this:

the result after adding the psd:

adjusting a bit more with brightness/contrast under the psd folder:

changing the colors with selective color (cyans and blues)

and finally, more brightness/contrast:

done!

i tried coloring this scene again, but this time with my base, and this is the result:

and the one made with the psd:

__________x__________

the final example:

from:

to:

as always, the same steps

but in this case, the yellows were showing too much and i wanted the blues to stand out.

i used the color balance for it (only the highlights tab):

then to turn down more, i used saturation (reds and yellows):

then i made more adjustments with the blues, added more brightness/contrast etc etc, however, there was still too many yellows for my taste, so i added one more hue/saturation layer:

and done!

___________x___________

and last but not least, a few tips:

if you want to change a scene from blue/cyan to purple/violet/crimson/(even green depending) etc all you need to do is play with the selective colors. but if you want to change the blue/cyan to, say, red, yellow, orange, (”a different”) green etc you can use hue/saturation.

i’m gonna take that gif from rdr2 as example

in case of this scene, i can use only the master tab to change the color because there aren’t many colors in this, so you can turn it into this:

or this:

or this: (and use more selective color to give more “personality” to the orange)

or you can use the selective color to change it to red:

and more hue/saturation to look more red:

but there are scenes which have many other colors together, so for those, you gonna have to use the specific tab of the color you wanna change. because if you use the master tab, it’ll screw with all the other colors

oh, i almost forgot! if you want to turn a white-ish scene into cyan/blue, all you have to do is use color balance to turn it a bit more blue (in this case, i only used the highlights tab), and add a layer of selective color and mess with the whites tab

then:

now:

__________________x___________________

ummmm, i think that’s all?? but if you want to ask anything else, feel free to!

#saltybatman #chaoticresources #completeresources #tutorial #gif tutorial #coloring tutorial #colorful #vibrant #ps tutorial #my tutorial #userlance #userteshia #userwilson #userlaiba #usercynti #yeahps #itsphotoshop #mine

[jennortegas]

Hello! I'm a gigantic fan of your work, and especially your color palette gifsets! I'm a very amateur gif maker and I can never get doing those sort of colorful gifs to go right. Could you share a few tips and tricks? You don't have to share like a whole tutorial or something, I don't want to copy you exactly! But if you could give some pointers in the right direction I would really love to learn more and be better at it!

Hi and thank you! Im glad you like my stuff! Please excuse my rambling with this answer, if there’s any clarification needed on things don’t be afraid to ask!

Ok so with my process with the color palette sets, I like having the palette beforehand just because I feel it helps me out when it comes to choosing scenes to gif. So like, say I have light blue in the palette, I know to gif scenes where that blue will show up and be noticeable. This especially is important if like a gif I originally did doesn’t work out with editing so I have to gif something else and im working with a specific color palette color. For palettes, I use Color Hex but Im sure there are other sites for palettes to reference.

My settings for gifs are NEVER the same so it’s hard to pinpoint exact things I do but Selective Color is my fave and saves me a lot in the coloring department when it comes to these sets. I usually mess with the Neutrals first, just to get the background to match with the color I want for the gif, then from there I’ll use the other colors in that adjustment layer to make skintones and stuff better. And then actually coloring the gif with the palette color, I always make it a new layer then use the paintbrush tool to add it in the gif. I also mess around with settings like opacity and such so again it’s a matter of messing around with it and seeing what works. Soft Light and Color are 2 settings that I usually use and sometimes I use both so like I will have 1 soft light color layer but then the color doesn’t pop enough so I add another color layer and set it to Color to get that pop. Then for Opacity I usually have it set to 85% when its Soft Light then for Color a little bit less than that. For any more pop in the color, Vibrance is the go to for me, very rarely do I use Saturation but when I do the setting isn’t high, I feel like Saturation messes with the color too much for me.

Hopefully this makes sense, I’m so sorry for my awful explaining skills. Again feel free to ask anymore questions about it. 

#i meant to answer this awhile ago but deadass didnt know what to say #i literally felt like making a tutorial halfway through answering because i didnt know if it made sense #literally i could picture it in my mind but wasnt sure if it translated into words #anon #asks

[inejkaz]

i was tagged by @mollyweasly to answer the following 73 questions! thank you for tagging me steph ♥ 

on a scale of 1-10, how excited are you about life right now? i'm actually pretty content and the only thing that i'm rdreading right now is my upcoming finals so maybe 6!

describe yourself in a hashtag? #alwaystired

if you could do a love scene with anyone, who would it be? no one comes to mind but steph's answer was chris evans and i'd say the same tbh 👀

if your life was a musical, what would the marquee say? uh maybe "dumb bitch" or "chaotic mess" LMAO idk honestly my life isn't that interesting most of the time

what’s one thing people don’t know about you? that i'm lowkey depressed. most of my old friends know this but they don't rlly know how bad it makes me feel sometimes & i don't think i'll ever tell my college friends abt this except for one person!

what’s your wake up ritual? lay in bed for another 5-15 mins, check the time, and brush my teeth. next i'd either shower, workout, or attend online class

what’s your go to bed ritual? just on my phone looking at useless things and answering my friends' messages. i'll get tired soon so i'll just daydream and sleep. lately i've been listening to music to help me sleep!

what’s your favorite time of day? late night and early morning

your go to for having a good laugh? i love watching lip sync battles. my favorites are by emma stone, tom holland, anne hathaway & channing tatum!

dream country to visit? the UK! my cousin talks abt it all the time and now she's taking her postgrad degree there which makes me incredibly jealous 😢 but honestly i'm dying to travel europe as a whole!

what’s the biggest surprise you’ve ever had? probably when my high school friends bought me the doc martens shoes that i LOVE for my 17th birthday! i love them and miss them even tho many are not in touch with me anymore

heels or flats/sneakers? flats/sneakers definitely! i've never tried heels tbh i can only endure wedges and they alr hurt SO much

vintage or new? both

who do you want to write your obituary? probably my best friend!

style icon? taylor swift during the red era, noora sætre, orion carloto, ashley aka best.dressed!

what are three things you cannot live without? books, internet, family

what’s one ingredient you put in everything? salt

what 3 people living or dead would you want to make dinner for? taylor swift, chris evans, audrey hepburn

what’s your biggest fear in life? the unknown, anything horror & reptiles esp lizards (i can't stand reptiles AT ALL i'd literally cry and die if i have to touch one or sleep in the same room with one)

window or aisle seat? window

what’s your current tv obsession? haven't been watching any tv lately but i've been watching mukbangs on youtube a lot

favorite app? line (a messaging app mostly used by indonesians. i rlly like the stickers and themes i own lmao)

secret talent? i can play guitar just a lil bit

most adventurous thing you’ve ever done in your life? either drinking beers with my friends on a school field trip or not telling my parents that i went to the city alone during college just to hangout by myself

how would you define yourself in three words? introverted, chaotic, anxious

favorite piece of clothing you own? an adidas jacket that was on a 50% sale for international women's day!!! 

a must have clothing item that everyone should have? black pants

a superpower you would want? invisibility and mind control!!!

what’s inspiring you in life right now? since i was a little kid, i've always been inspired by my cousin. she's my role model!

best piece of advice you’ve received? to literally BELIEVE in yourself

best advice you’d give your teenage self? don't be so self-aware bc everyone's busy with themselves, make more friends, cherish your time in school more

a book everyone should read? harry potter series, the raven cycle

what would you like to be remembered for? for being a good, positive person

how do you define beauty? beauty is whatever that evokes a positive feeling out of oneself i guess!

what do you love most about your body? my eyes

best way to take a rest/decompress? skincare, listen to soothing music, drink a warm beverage, watch smth that's easy to watch, and just sleep! 

favorite place to view art? galleries, but i've only been to one sadly

if your life was a song, what would the title be? maybe "paradox" or "misunderstood"

if you could master one instrument, what would it be? piano! but it's expensive and not portable so if i'm being realistic, it'd be guitar

if you had a tattoo, where would it be? in the back of my neck! also maybe on any of my fingers or below my ribcage

dolphins or koalas? koalas

what’s your spirit animal? deer!

best gift you’ve ever received? doc martens shoes given by my friends!

best gift you’ve given? i think i wrote my friend letters to open when she's in different moods once

what’s your favorite board game? monopoly

what’s your favorite color? pink, purple, yellow, monochrome

least favorite color? i just dislike bright obnoxious colors

diamond or pearls? diamonds

drugstore makeup or designer? both, but i mostly can't afford designer anyway so..

blow-dry or air-dry? both

pilates or yoga? i've never tried any actually

coffee or tea? both, but i'm leaning towards tea

what’s the weirdest word in the english language? can't think of any right now..

dark chocolate or milk chocolate? milk chocolate!!!

stairs or elevators? elevators

summer or winter? winter

you are stuck on an island, you can pick one food to eat forever without getting tired of it, what would you eat? burgers!!

a dessert you don’t like? basically i won't like anything with fruits

a skill you’re working on mastering? photoshop i guess? i'm planning to learn coding too now that i have the time!!

best thing to happen to you today? probably finishing my gifset! but honestly, i was supposed to be studying lmao

worst thing to happen to you today? i didn't study lmao

best compliment you’ve ever received? i don't think it's anything that memorable so i can't really think of one

favorite smell? jasmine

hugs or kisses? both

if you made a documentary, would it be about? space, mythology

last piece of content you consumed that made you cry? i get a little teary eyed if i come across a touching content on instagram/twitter tbh lmao. but i'd say the last movie that made me cry so bad was her (2013)

lipstick or lipgloss? lipstick

sweet or savory? savory

girl crush? emma watson

how do you know your in love? don't think i've ever been in love, i've only experienced like a very long crush so...

a song you can listen to on repeat? there are a lot... but for now, woman by mumford & sons and anything by taylor swift

if you could switch lives with someone for a day, who would it be? taylor swift!!!

what are you most excited for about this time in your life? i've just been enjoying editing for tumblr a lot, i haven't really posted consistent content in my 10 years of being here so that's been fun. i also want to learn coding and become an overall healthier person by working out regularly & eating mindfully! honestly i'm trying to build my confidence and become healthier, both mentally and physically 

tagging: @dianaprincie @cllianmurphy @cinderllas @edgarallan @rosamunqpike @gamoora @nataliamaximoff (sorry if you've done this before, feel free to ignore!)

#this took so long!!!!! #tag games

[theoneinmultiplefandoms]

Attention dear Pewdiepie Fans, especially those who follow the @pewdsfanarchive blog!

I’m doing an announcement here on my main blog because I want to say something about the Fan Archive, since that blog is my responsibility and hopefully, people will understand what’s going on. (Spoilers: No, I’m not deleting it. In fact, I’m doing something with it.)

Read more below!

(Most of what I’ll be talking about could be a bit personal, but at least it has some honesty from me. Take your time to read them.)

First off, about the Information Posts:

It would’ve been a miracle if one could do an Information Post for every Pewdiepie video existed. Sadly, a human like me, who is busy with other stuff IRL and has this type of motivation that keeps waning in and out, couldn��t be that miracle. I really love Pewds’ videos (old and new), don’t get me wrong, but doing Information Posts by myself for every video started to feel more like a task forced upon me rather than something I want to do, even on my spare time. (You can even notice it through all the delays and announcements I’ve done in that blog.) It made me feel like I’m not actually ready for such a huge responsibility, although I did want to do these things.

Yet throughout the delays, all of you still enjoyed those kinds of posts, even if it’s through small likes/comments/reblogs. In fact, I even recall how fun it was, searching up all those memes/arts/whatever information pops up from those videos and typing them down in an organized way. It tends to be a bit tiring, but it made me happy thinking about how much effort I placed on these posts, and for you to see and appreciate them in some way.

Conclusion: the Information Posts stay. However, they’ll be more focused on videos of Pewds’ that I find interest of, and will be posted whenever I have the time/motivation to do so. Chronological order will not be followed anymore, so expect a slight mess.

Second, about the blog itself:

Now that the Info Posts are not considered as an urgent task anymore, what will it mean for the blog in its entirety? One obvious answer I can think of for this question is: I’ll make the blog more community-focused. (Yep, it means more reblogging.) 

I’ve seen brilliant pieces of fan-arts, wonderfully edited gifsets, and lovely little appreciation posts made by some of the Tumblr peeps in the #pewdiepie tag behind all the hate and callouts. I want to give them recognition for their works too, even those who haven’t been able to post in a longgggg time. In some way, I’d like to give positivity back to the tag and on any Pewds fan’s dashboard, because they too inspire positivity for me.

If you’re wondering about what I’ll reblog, it’ll be a mix of past, present, and even future posts/arts/gifs/whatever!

Finally, about the layout/appearance of the blog:

For me, new changes means a new look. I’ll be placing the blog in "w.i.p.” mode for now until I’ve decided with its new appearance, in hopes that I’ll find a theme more user-friendly than that of the old one (the posts on Desktop mode look too large for me). I’m opening up to people who’s willing to provide me some gifs/wallpapers/backgrounds I can use for the new theme!

Thanks for taking your time to read! I’ll be seeing you soon, with new colors!

#pewdiepie #felix kjellberg #long post #onem talks #pewdsfan onem #big announcement thingy #to be reblogged on the fan archive

[softjeon]

Wolfsbane | Final

• Pairing: Yoongi x Jungkook • Genre: Fluff & little bit of angst  | Wolf!AU / Shapeshifter!AU ( → Gifset Trailer) • Words: 12,2k | written with @cassiavioletblue • Disclaimer: mention of violence, light graphic content, smut

↳  For a a few short hopeful minutes he thought that maybe he could just have Jungkook here at his place for a little while longer, maybe it would take the others a few days to find him, maybe they were busy with something else - but he was fooling himself, he knew that and when he could hear the sound of paws drumming on earth he knew that this little adventure of Jungkook’s was already over.

« previous chapter | masterlist | next chapter »

Yoongi had barely slept. He had curled up on the couch right after Jungkook left, hoping to sleep for as long as he could, longer than it would take for the sun to rise and if he was really, really lucky he would oversleep Jungkook’s mate off and wouldn’t have to think about what was happening right now or if it was already over and Jungkook would get claimed.

He ached for the younger and he also felt sorry for himself; why did he have to get a taste of paradise if it was taken from him so shortly after. He would have been fine to be the lone wolf forever but after meeting Kook? How could he go back to how it was before. He would always hope for a dirty little thing running through his territory, or a little ball of fluff and sunshine chasing butterflies, jipping in joy and catching the air until he was panting…

However, Yoongi hadn’t even managed to stay asleep till after sunrise, waking from pure uneasiness, from the pain in his chest or the hurricane in his mind he didn’t know. He got up and started to pace because he couldn’t take the tension, couldn’t take the thoughts and fears and his utterly useless longing for the other’s presence. He couldn’t do anything. He was unable to help or to change Jin’s mind he would only bring trouble and chaos for all of them, he should let Kook go while he could but... he just couldn’t. His mind and heart both were refusing to circle around anything but Jungkook. He couldn’t do this. He couldn’t just stand by and do nothing! This was torture!

…

Jungkook’s eyes were wide open as he laid in bed, staring up at the ceiling. He could hear someone coming up the stairs, but he didn’t care. His body felt like it wasn’t his own anymore. Nothing was his anymore. The knock on the door jerked him out of his thoughts and the young wolf sat up. His red, puffy eyes met Jin’s and then Jimin’s who was looking at him all worried and sad, while he still tried to smile. But Jungkook could see through it.

“It’s not time, yet,” Jungkook said in a hoarse voice, “I thought it would be at sun down. What do you need from me now?” He tried a smile, “I won’t run away. I’m here, right? And I don’t want to eat.”

Jin smiled courtly. “Nothing. Not yet.” So Jimin spoke up, adding, “We just want to get you ready Jungkook. You don’t have to be alone today. We’ll take care of you one last day. So that tonight you’ll feel ready and pretty and perfectly prepared.” Come on, what are you waiting for? Let’s get you under a nice, warm shower and then fluff up your fur.”

Jungkook simply followed, ignoring Jin’s stern gaze and the way he eyed his dirty skin from last night when he had run to Yoongi. The young wolf stepped under the shower, his eyes unfocused, his mind blank. He almost slipped when he stepped onto the tile floor again, drying himself up slowly, only coming back out after while again.

“Was he only here to see for himself that I’m here?” Jungkook asked Jimin, who had been waiting for him sitting on the edge of the bed, while Jin had turned around again. “I said, I will be here.” He growled low, “Do you need me to turn?”

“It’s alright. Don’t be mad at him. You’re just too important. He wanted to make sure you’re in a .. good state. And you went missing for too often those last few days for him not to check up on you. Isn’t it nice, though to know that he cares? He’ll be so proud of you when you sit by his side tonight and there are so many fighters that came just for you! Jungkook, you are really, really wanted. Isn’t that a great thing to know?” Jimin tried to cheer up the younger wolf in vain who seemed to be only run by autopilot and bitterness.

“Yeah, great. Really…,” Jungkook smiled at him and sat down right next to him. “I’m glad I can make him proud.” He chuckled quietly, “How many are there?”

“About fifteen. But they won’t all fight, don’t worry. There’ll be a meetup and there’ll be lots of growling and threatening - just for the event of course, no one would serious threaten anyone here - and then a few will give up until only a handful are left. They will fight until first blood and only the last two will fight each other seriously. It still might take a while, often a few hours for the whole procedure to be over and you’ll naturally be on edge the whole time so we will get a good meal into you and make you comfortable so that you’ll be able to be there and at your best the whole time.” Jimin put a warm blanket over his shoulders. “Now change please and let me take care of your fur.”

“I said, I don’t want to eat anything.” Jungkook mumbled angrily before he changed into a wolf easily, laying down on the floor for Jimin. He turned his head away from him and onto his paws, closing his eyes. Jungkook didn’t want to listen to whatever Jimin was telling him right now. He wanted to think about how to get himself out of his misery. He wanted the night to be over already.

Although Jimin noticed Jungkook’s apathy he tried to make up for it with talking more and pretending that everything was fine, hoping that it would make Jungkook go along in the end. After prepping his fur and making it look as fluffy as possible he asked Jungkook to turn back and then took him with him for a meal. Normally they all ate together but on this special occasion it was only the two of them. It was tradition for one or more of the mated omegas to be with the one who would be mated that night and so Jimin stayed the whole time but he wished he could be somewhere else when Jungkook still refused to eat. “Jungkook, pup, it won’t change anything if you don’t eat. It’ll just anger Jin and you’ll be more exhausted tonight. Don’t you want to be perfect for your future mate? Don’t you want to be strong and healthy for him to be pleased with you?”

Jungkook shivered from the way Jimin was talking to him. “Yeah, I’m sorry. I will please them. I’ll be perfect then,” He put on a smile and reached for the fork, hesitating. He felt sick to his stomach, his airways constricting. “I…” Jungkook took in a sharp breath, the color fading from his face and he tumbled off the stool running off as fast as he could and into the nearest bathroom. The anxiety was getting the better off him, swallowing him up whole and leaving him a shivering mess.

Jimin let him catch him breath before he was by his side again offering a glass of water. “Is it the nerves? You don’t have to be scared. It will be fine. We all had to go through this. You’ll manage just as well.” It hurt to see Jungkook so unhappy, but it was his responsibility that the younger would behave so if he didn’t want to feel the consequences he had to make Jungkook compliant. “No food then if you feel like you can’t stomach it right now. If you feel hungry later just tell me and I might get a chance to get a little something for you to chew on. Is that a deal?” He didn’t even wait for Jungkook to agree before pulling him along. “Now the last step will be some relaxation. There is everything you might need, some herbs, some oil, something to read, a warm blanket.. you can meditate or I can read to you or you can just sit and think. We’ll wait until sundown - and then we’ll join the others.”

Jungkook nodded slowly, following Jimin wherever the other wanted him and laid down somewhere close on the couch when he was sure he didn’t need to do anything else. He closed his eyes in an instant, blacking out completely, only flinching when he felt Jimin’s hand raking through his hair again.

“We got to go.”

Jungkook’s eyes were wide open in a second as he realized he had fallen asleep. Inside of him was a storm of thoughts, voices screaming for him to run and get out of there. But his body moved on its own as he walked down the stairs with Jimin, turning into a wolf at the doorstep. His heart was threatening to jump right of its cage, blood pumping fast through his veins and making Jungkook feel dizzy. He kept close to Jimin’s side, almost hiding.

Jin sat upright on a little hill, over which he could overview the meadow perfectly, a content smile on his face. It had turned out the way he wanted. Wolves were excited to fight, to mate, to finally see a spectacle happening again. It wasn’t so often anymore. The packs getting smaller. Humans threatening their lives and traditions. When he turned to look at his right, there was Namjoon, Hoseok and Taehyung - who was looking rather nervous himself. He nodded in affirmation, watching the sun setting lower on the horizon.

It was almost time.

A whisper went through the crowd, when Jungkook appeared and the younger hid even more, whimpering quietly as they walked through them. There were a few wolves sniffing him, taking in his sweet scent right away, teasingly snapping at him, laughing at the youngers reactions, while others just watched him hungrily. Jungkook couldn’t believe this was real, nor that it was for him. When his life had turned upside down, he had never thought it would get like this.

“This is him,” Jimin whispered quietly nudging Jungkook’s side as he bowed his head in front of the ‘blue moon’s leader. The young wolf's eyes widened at his view. He was big. Bigger than Yoongi. Fur as black as coal, with eyes that were narrowed, following the younger’s movements precisely. Jungkook let his gaze wander around a bit further, trying to see anyone, any wolf that he could find mildly okay enough to be considered...a mate for him. But he was only kidding himself. For a second, he had thought it would be okay, that he would be fine.

He wasn’t.

His own instinct let Jungkook hide behind his leader as soon as they stood on the hill, pushing his snout into Jin’s black fur. There was nowhere he was safe right now. Nowhere to run. He wouldn’t make it far. He had to watch this. Jungkook whimpered pathetically, closing his eyes.

Jin angrily pushed Jungkook’s face from him, hissing at him with sharp words that could have cut through glass. “Stop hiding! You’re a grown wolf! You’re embarrassing me! They want someone they can be proud of winning so stop acting like a child and get yourself together! I did what I could for you now it’s time to pay me back. Do really want to disappoint the pack? Your family? They trust in you. Don’t let them down like this. You can be happy that so many came for you. Imagine how it would have been if no one would have wanted to fight for you and I would have needed to give you over to the next best person who asked without any fight at all. This way you know you’ll get a strong and capable wolf as your mate, someone who will protect you from any harm and be able to feed you and take care of you. That’s the most you can wish for. So, show some gratitude and let them see your face.” He had spoken quickly and when he turned back to the wolves he was smiling again, no trace from the anger in his voice was left visible on his face.

Jungkook froze, his eyes wide as he couldn't recognize his own pack leader anymore. His sharp words cutting through him. Although everything in him told him to scream back, Jungkook didn't. Instead he sat himself right next to Jin with shaking paws and held up his head. Just like he wanted him. Perfectly in view for everyone to admire him. His whole body was stiff only his eyes flickered over the crowd and then back to Taehyung and then Jimin. A pleading look. Jungkook felt nauseous, a little too dizzy from the lack of food and water, as he turned back and Jin’s voice was making everyone listen up. The sun was about to go down.

Jin got up from his place and started talking, addressing the foreign wolves all at the same time. “Welcome my fellow wolves. We are so very glad that you took the time and effort to come all the way today to be with Jungkook during his ceremony. You probably have heard about the unusual circumstances of his upbringing, but I can assure you that he is as fierce and capable as a wolf should be - and twice as beautiful. Just take a look at him...” He stepped aside so that the spotlight was fully on the younger who felt visibly uncomfortable under all those intense gazes.

“Whoever is lucky enough to win him will get himself an adventurous, compassionate and affectionate companion who won’t act like the average omega. It won’t ever get boring with him, he’s ambitious and daring, always pushing his limits and he has grown so much over the last few weeks and I’m sure he’ll continue to grow, both spirit and body. You can teach him, watch him learn and adapt and become the mate you always wanted. I’m certain that he’ll make his mate very lucky.” Jin had never praised Jungkook in front of the younger like that but he meant what he said. Of course, Jungkook could also be stubborn and proud, easily overwhelmed by too many new impressions and a bundle of restless uncontrollable energy but Jin didn’t doubt that in the right hands Jungkook would bloom into a magnificent wolf and be an enjoyable companion. As he had praised Jungkook enough now - and really, the wolves were interested in Kook already or else they wouldn’t be here - he did his political part right after. “No matter from which packs and clans you are and to which pack Jungkook will belong to in the end, I hope the attendance in this ceremony will be a pleasant experience for you and strengthen our ties of friendship - so that we’ll have stronger bonds and closer relationships in the future. After all we can’t let the humans rule this planet alone. We won’t give up our place and with each other’s help we will make the packs grow back to their old strength and former glory. Thank you for your attention. You can start now.”

Jin sat back down besides Jungkook, his heart hammering in his chest. He was almost as tense as Jungkook as this was really important for them. He wished he would have had more time to let Jungkook grow into this because right now as it was Jungkook seemed utterly frightened. He leaned over and gave him an encouraging smile. “You’ll see, it’ll turn out right for you.” Then he turned his attention back to what was happening.

The wolves had waited in a loose circle for Jin to end his speech and as soon as he had officially given them permission they broke into small groups. The first part of this wasn’t even fighting, it was just testing out the water, threatening, lots of growling and macho behavior. Those who weren’t confident enough or were lacking strength or skills were filtered out here as they’d submit to the bigger and stronger wolves and give up without a single fight. It kept them from getting unnecessarily hurt and saved the wolf's strength who would actually fight later. Only when none of the wolves in the circle were backing down it would turn to the second stage where there’d be actual one on one fights. The winners of those fights would then fight against the other winners, always until the first blood was shed. And only when there were two wolfs left would the last part start, the main attraction, the fight over Jungkook’s companionship and the one where it wasn’t uncommon for wolves to get seriously injured because they were adamant to fight till one of them couldn’t any more.

Jungkook visibly flinched when the leader of the blue moon’s growl made everyone stop and stare. The black wolf was sure of himself. Oozing confidence as he stepped out from his own crowd, eyeing the potential fighters. Slowly he stepped forward, his gaze stopping as it met Jungkook’s. He bowed slightly to him and Jungkook could swear he saw a smirk on his face.

A push from Jin, reminded him to bow as well, keeping his eyes fixated on his.

Slowly but surely everyone else around the wolf withdrew, some quickly, some were pacing at the side, back and forth until a side glance of the bigger wolf made them stop or retreat or bow their heads in submission. Jin’s pack was stunned into silence. As Jimin had told Kook before the whole ceremony could take hours and none of them had ever heard of one where it hadn’t been pitch black darkness when the mates had finally found together. Right now, however the sun had just set, and the event hadn’t been longer than half an hour - and yet it almost looked as if the mate off was already decided. Fight-less.

Jimin hid behind Namjoon in shock. He had no idea what it would mean for Kook if someone ‘won’ him without even having to fight. Normally it added to your status, that wolves told each other how great and thrilling the fights over you had been. But if there was no one daring to fight for Jungkook’s company Jimin doubted that the others would see it as a good sign. Jungkook’s reputation in his new pack might already get bad before he had done anything at all.

Jungkook was staring at the happening in front of him, realizing way too late that this wasn’t how it was supposed to be. There was barely any growls, but the one’s coming from the black wolf, who was flashing his teeth at everyone coming too close to him. Jungkook shivered from it.

“Namjoon, why aren’t they fighting? Someone needs to fight!” Jimin mumbled, inching closer to Namjoon as if he needed protection, although there was no potential threat for him. “He can’t be that strong, can he?”

Slowly but surely the growls died down. There was silence, utter, uncomfortable silence on side of Jin’s pack. Even those of them who had believed wholeheartedly in Jin’s decision to do this were starting to question it, starting to worry what this would mean - for both Kook and their own state. The only one who looked pleased and relaxed was the ‘blue moon’ wolf. After none of them had said another word or tried to do anything he trotted closer until he stood right in front of the little hill Jin and Kook were on. “Do you want me to do anything else or will I get to claim my prize now?” The voice of the black wolf sounded confident of his victory and proud.

Everyone’s eyes were on Jin as he eyed the big wolf with a stern expression. Jungkook was biting his tongue, trying not to make a sound. No whining. No whimpers. He wanted to beg his pack leader to not give him away like this, to let him stay for a little while longer. Jungkook wanted to cry out, his whole body shivering from the anxiety. He took in a sharp breath, eyes flickering between the wolf and Jin.

“The rules state that I have to call out for a fighter three times, before you can claim your prize without a fight.” Jin’s voice was just as confident as he kept his head held high. He needed the fight to happen or else it was all for nothing. Jin hadn’t planned this from the moment he saw Jungkook for this to be over in thirty minutes. He wanted this to be special, because Jungkook was special. This was supposed to be big, bigger, something that no wolf had seen before. “How can I be sure you’re the right fit for my cub if I didn’t see you fight?”

The other laughed loudly, “Doesn’t it make me even more fitting for your little wolf if no one even dares to fight me? I’d say that this should be enough for you to give him over to me willingly but go on, follow the rules. After all it’s what the pack is made of; traditions, rules and wolves strong enough to follow them when others grow soft and weak and human. And if you really fear for my ability to defend him then I would generously be willing to show my strength - and take him from you in a fight if that’s what you want.” The atmosphere had changed even though the black wolf was still smiling his wolfish grin just like before. You could see his words as a joke, an accommodation to Jin’s worries - or as a threat to Jin himself, which would mean that the other was threatening the whole pack. And it wouldn’t be the first time that a smaller pack would be swallowed whole by a bigger one, get integrated into the clan who had taken over and  kept for the lower and more risky duties like defense or hunting in dangerous territory.

Namjoon and Hoseok were up on their paws right away, making sure Jin felt their strong presence behind him. Jimin took a step back, his worries written all over his face motioning for Taehyung to come over to his side, while Hoseok stepped up next to Jungkook and Namjoon did the same for Jin.

But the leader only nodded slowly, his heart beating a little too fast. He was a good fighter, he knew that. But his pack was small and Jin wasn’t dumb. His chances against a way bigger and more ruthless wolf weren’t as high. “I want a clean and friendly event.” His voice grew stronger, more demanding, “We should respect the rules, nonetheless. I will call out three times for an opponent and if no one steps up you may claim your wolf.” Jungkook’s eyes wandered over the crowd of wolves, who were all staying frozen. The young wolf gulped heavily, trying to take deep breaths but failed miserably. He turned to Hoseok, looking at the other all worried and fearful.

Hoseok returned his gaze with dark eyes, not even trying to keep up the facade. They were all on edge right now and no matter what Jin had said about this being a friendly event, if no one would answer Jin’s demand to step out the black wolf’s claim would leave a bitter taste in their mouth.

Jin spoke up. “Does no one want to question this claim?” There was silence except of heavy breaths and the movement of paws against earth. “I’m asking again, is no one here who feels like he has the duty to step up and claim Jungkook as a mate - does no one else want to take a risk for him? If you feel like he might be worth it you should give it a try or else you might regret it to never have taken that chance. A wolf like Jungkook is only claimable every once in a while.”

Jungkook wanted to scream at Jin to stop talking about him like that, as if he was a prize to win. He felt sick to his stomach and the younger stumbled a little, trying to keep himself upright when all he wanted was to curl in on himself. Or run. To Yoongi. Or anywhere else. The tears shot into his eyes in a second and Jungkook had to blink furiously to keep himself together or else he would fuck this up even more. He closed his eyes.

Jin called out for an opponent one last time.

And when Jungkook opened them again, there was still nothing. And in this moment, Jungkook could feel his heart shatter into a million pieces. Slowly, he was falling apart on the inside. There was no other way now for him. Jungkook would have to run away sooner or later – even if it meant his death. He looked up and met the wolf’s gaze, taking a slow step forward.

“I’m challenging him!” A sharp voice rang loud through the silence, causing the wolves heads to whip around.

The caller hadn’t come from the loose circle of wolves around the black one but from the edge of the clearing a bit to the side. Under the curious and surprised gaze of about two dozen wolves Yoongi stepped out of the shadows. His fur was dark with sweat because he had run here all the way but he held his head high and stood as tall as he could. No matter the consequences he had to try to fight for Kook or else he would never be able to forgive himself for letting the younger run into this misery.

“Yoongi!” The name slipped from both of their lips alike and Jin snapped his head around to Jungkook for a second, who had reacted to the white wolfs arrival right away. A whisper went through the wolves as they eyed the intruder, trying to figure out who he was and those who knew, were bowing their heads or kept their distance.

“It’s him,” Jimin whispered moving closer to Namjoon again out of fear, “It’s the solitary wolf, right? Oh no, Jungkookie no.” He nuzzled his face in his partners fur, to try and keep a hold of himself. He had wished for Jungkook’s happy ending so badly. Namjoon was trying to soothe Jimin quietly to not bother Jin, while at the same time he had to smile. He hadn’t seen the white wolf in a long time (unlike Jimin, he had been with Jin for a long time and he knew Yoongi, had seen the mess their break off was) – nonetheless he kept his place next to his pack leader.

“Do you need us to escort him back into his territory?” Hoseok whispered, leaning over Jungkook and towards his leader, while the young wolfs eyes were glued onto Yoongis. Something that the black wolf noticed right away. He let out a threatening growl, stomping his paw on the ground as he turned his head towards Yoongi.

“He is mine,” The ‘blue moon’ leader flashed his teeth in a threat.

The wolves around them were growling, cheering them on as they had been bored with the event so far, all stunned by the fearlessness by the solitary wolf. Jungkook felt dizzy from all of it. There was no way he could let Yoongi fight. Although Yoongi was big, he was nothing in comparison to the ‘blue moon’ leader. Yoongi would get hurt because of him. Jungkook couldn’t let that happen, so he turned to Jin, “Y-you can’t let him fight. He …he wasn’t invited, right?” It was a weak attempt of Jungkook to keep Yoongi alive and out of this. But it backfired. “I…I’m fine, please,” Jungkook whispered towards Yoongi, pleading the one he loved to not challenge the other wolf, to not fight for him but once more his heart got shattered, when Jin finally unfroze.

He smirked and slowly trotted off the hill and towards the two opponents, leaving behind a shaking Jungkook. “Very brave of you, Yoongi. So, you give your life for the pack in the end anyways.” Jin whispered, walking around the white wolf, “You’re finally playing by the rules and decide to be what you truly are.” He chuckled pathetically, “When was the last time you followed your alpha instincts? When you fought someone for real?” He leaned in closer, “You won’t survive this, but I’m glad you’re giving Jungkook the show he deserves.”

Yoongi tried not to let it get to him that Jungkook's first instinct was to sabotage him instead of joy. For a second he hesitated, wondering if Jungkook might have changed his mind and decided that he liked the wolf who was about to win him but in the way his eyes nervously started to flicker back and forth when he tried at the ‘blue moon’ wolf Yoongi saw that Jungkook was simply scared. Probably for him. He ignored Jin’s words for the sake of concentrating on his opponent - and because Jin could still refuse to let him fight. After all he had broken their treaty of each of them staying on their own territory. But apparently Jin was so sure that he would lose that he let him join the ceremony without question.

Jungkook couldn’t keep still. “Yoongi,” His name was barely a whisper from him but Yoongi heard it, nonetheless. There was nothing else, even though Jungkook wanted to scream for him to stop, to not get himself into danger or get possibly killed because of him. He wasn’t worth it, was what he wanted to say but a fearful whimper was the only thing that escaped him.

“I want a clean fight until either one of you admits their defeat or else…,” Jin announced and turned to the white wolf one last time, “Let’s see if you still got it.” He nodded at the opponent, before he retreated to his spot next to Jungkook with a smug expression as the wolves took their places. The crowd was cheering loudly.

There was absolutely nothing Jungkook could do but watch.

Yoongi blurred out everything else but the black wolf and the knowledge that Jungkook had looked hopeful just now. As if he was scared beyond belief but a tiny little part of him was still left that believed in his dreams coming true. Jungkook had asked him to stay with him just yesterday so the thought of playing by Jin’s rules and still getting what he wanted must seem like winning the lottery to the younger. Sadly, it was just as impossible. Yoongi knew that. He knew it now and he had known it a few hours ago when the thought of Jungkook going through the preparations had made him feel like someone was lighting his nerves on fire. He had been in actual physical pain; his stomach clenching and his muscles so tense that it started to hurt but he couldn’t distract himself from the images in his head. Jungkook, all frightened and lonely on top of the hill, his pleading eyes, begging wordlessly for someone to come save him and then finally the desperation that would follow when the fight was over and he had gotten someone that he didn’t love, someone who he would have to take on as his mate if he didn’t want to risk to be killed on the spot by the winner of the fights. Saying no wasn’t an option for him. Not really.

So, to get his head free he had gone out into the woods and started to pace, then to run, as fast as he could and when he realized that there was only one place he could be running to right now his paws had already brought him half the way. And he realized that this was the only way it could go. Staying out of this wasn’t an option any longer. Not after his heart beat faster with every memory of Jungkook and his body ached for being close to the younger again so strongly that Yoongi felt sick the longer he was separated from him. So, he had made the decision to crash the party - and fight against anyone who would try to take Jungkook away.

“Fight!” Jin’s voice was a loud growl, followed by the howls of a dozen wolves around.

Jungkook cried out the moment the black wolf jumped towards Yoongi with a targeted attack. He just couldn’t help it. Even though Jin growled at him again, scolding him to stay quiet. So, he bit his tongue, trying his best to stay on his spot. His whole body tense and still he was shivering, small whimpers escaping him. He felt so utterly helpless and alone.

Jungkook’s eyes flickered over to Taehyung who was hiding his face in Hoseok’s neck and then to Jimin, who was staying close to Namjoon. When his eyes fell back onto Jin, he only met a content expression. Jin had gotten his event, one that many would talk about. How a solitary wolf challenged the ‘Blue Moon’ Leader. The howling and cheering of the crowd gotten louder and Jungkook gulped heavily, closing his eyes in a weak attempt to not see how the one he loved would get hurt. Because of him. It was all because of him.

Yoongi was smaller and not as strong, they both knew that. So instead of trying to attack the other full on he tried to use his swiftness and his light footedness to his advantage. He only barely dodged the attack, ducking and turning to be as unpredictable as he could be, his eyes never leaving the other wolf. He was a little too confident, trusting into his muscles while forgetting that his muscles wouldn’t help him at all if Yoongi found a way to get close to his throat. Because there the other was just as vulnerable as Yoongi.

“You really think you can fight me, huh?” The wolf teased Yoongi, slowly getting closer to him to try and jump him once more. “He will be mine. I will claim him,” He licked over his snout, grinning with confidence. “His leader told me he’s innocent.” The black wolf was cocking his head to the side, “I like them like that.”

He had expected the other to try and rattle him, so he had mentally prepared himself. And yet he still froze for a second when it sunk in what the other implied. It was enough for the other to throw his head forward and snap at him. Yoongi’s fast reflexes saved him from a full bite but he was still pulled forward and then there was a paw on him together with the full weight of the ‘blue moon’ wolf that weighed him down. Yoongi writhed like a worm, kicking his legs and snapping at the others weak spots but before he could grip anything with his teeth there was a sharp pain in his side. He howled miserably.

Jungkook snapped his eyes open at that. His heart stopped for a second as he saw Yoongi on the ground, the black wolf hovering over him, sure of his own win already. “Get up! Yoongi! Please, please get-,” Jungkook felt himself pushed aggressively, Jin’s snout dangerously close to his face. It was enough of a warning for him.

“That little baby boy likes you, huh?” The blue moon leader eyed the white wolf underneath him, “Sad that he will see you die, then. I’ll keep a close eye on him, I promise you. He’ll have it good with me.” He chuckled low, snapping at Yoongi aggressively.

To the other it was a game but to Yoongi it was everything. That was his only advantage. He wouldn’t give up; he would rather risk his death than submit to the other and live with the knowledge that Jungkook had been forced to be the other’s mate. Not when he had come close enough to take Jungkook home with him and have a chance at living together with him. Instead of answering Yoongi braced himself and then threw himself at the other like crazy, not caring for the risk or his pain or whatever else could held him back; he was a hurricane of flashing teeth and animalistic growls and soon enough his teeth met fur and his jaw locked as he was furious attacking with claws and teeth and everything he had to offer. The fell over each other, fur flying where it had been ripped out, growls and painful yips mixing together into the horrific soundtrack of their fight.

The sounds were colliding with the howls from the crowd and his own heartbeat. Jungkook let out a howl, hiding and curling in on himself, when suddenly there was nothing but silence.

Jin couldn’t believe what he saw, neither could anyone else. It was quiet. Too quiet, while Jungkook had his eyes closed, his chest heaving heavily with every breath he took, quietly begging, pleading, whimpering for it to be over. He was murmuring the same things over and over again. Hoping that this fight wouldn’t be one till death. That this was all just a bad dream, that Jimin would wake him up, tell him that the day just had started and then he would take the chance to run right away. There would be no fight. No one hurt because of him.

The packs eyes were wide open in shock as they tried to comprehend what just had happened, staring down at the scenery. Neither of them was saying anything. There was too much blood dipping the fresh, green grass into an ugly red, fur flying everywhere, slowly settling on the ground. Only one wolf left panting, his eyes fixated on Jungkook’s curled in body.

Yoongi could barely stand.

The other had broken his hind leg and the pain was making him dizzy, but he nevertheless stood straight. The other wasn’t dead. He had hit him full force, their heads colliding and the other had fallen like a tree. He was still breathing and even though it was risky to turn his back on him instead of going for his throat to rip it out he was glad that their new life wouldn’t begin with bloodshed. He tried to address Jin but his voice broke and it took him a while to speak loud enough for anyone to hear.

“This fight is over. And I’ll spare his life as a sign of friendship for the ‘blue moon’ pack. He fought well and I’d be honored to meet him again.” Lies, nothing but lies but pack life was always politics and Yoongi had just pull it off good enough for him to be able to take Jungkook home with him. “I hope you all appreciate this sign of peace - but if anyone here doubts my commitment and abilities concerning my new mate than feel free to step forward and I will defend my right to mate this wolf with everything I have.” No one spoke, the silence was deafening. Yoongi stared at Jin as threateningly as he could muster with his view blurring and his legs threatening to give out under him.

“I’d like to claim my prize now.”

When Yoongi’s voice reached Jungkook, the young wolf snapped his head up. His eyes flickered over the scene quickly, how the wolves of the ‘blue moon’ pack were carrying their leader away and then to Yoongi, who looked awful – but alive.

“He’s yours.” Jin nodded at him, before he trotted down the hill. The event was over. There was nothing more for him to see.

Jungkook didn’t hear it anymore how Jin was giving him over to Yoongi, nor did he hear Jimin’s shocked gasp as he thought the solitary wolf would only harm the young wolf. But the doubts had faded the moment the young wolf stood in front of him. Jungkook had ran fast down the hill, almost stumbling over his own paws only stopping right in front of the white wolf.

The moment Jungkook came to a halt in front of him the tension seeped out of Yoongi’s body and he almost collapsed on the spot, sinking down onto the ground instead, feeling the earth against his belly grounding him. This wasn’t a dream. He had fought and he had won Jungkook. Of everything that could have happened he was lucky enough to get his wish fulfilled. Wounds and a broken leg were small prizes to pay for the permission to share his life with Jungkook. Yoongi was panting from pain and exhaustion, but he smiled.

“Hey, my little ball of fur. How are you doing?” It was probably the most stupid thing to ask when you were the one who had been at risk of dying but the past few hours must have been a rollercoaster of emotions for Jungkook and also Yoongi just wanted to make sure that they were on the same page and Jungkook still wanted this.

“Y-Yoongi,” There were tears burning in his eyes, but he couldn’t care less, softly leaning his head towards Yoongi, nuzzling his fur and starting to lick him not caring how many were seeing them. He wanted to care for him, just as much as Yoongi had fought for him the last hour. Soft little whimpers were coming from Jungkook nonetheless as he cleaned Yoongi up a little more – carefully not to hurt him. “Don’t ever do this again, please.” Jungkook was pushing his snout into his fur, “But I’m so glad that you did…oh god, are you hurt, Yoongi?”

Yoongi laughed, he couldn’t help it, there was pure happiness bursting inside of him like bubbles and filling his whole being. He felt shivery whenever Jungkook’s snout buried into his fur and the cute little licks with which Kook tried to clean him where soothing his heart more than anything else. He wouldn’t be lonely anymore. He got someone now. And not just anyone; someone who made butterflies flutter in his stomach and his heart vibrate from the onslaught of emotions. Jungkook was his mate, the perfect person to complete his soul, Yoongi had no doubt about that.

Jungkook was crying instead, sobbing into Yoongi’s shoulder quietly. “I love you, please, don’t leave me and never get hurt again,” The young wolf was mumbling into his dirty fur, “No more being a bad wolf.” The sun was fully gone by now and with it every wolf pack around them. Jungkook felt a little safer like this. Just the both of them. Or so he thought. The younger wolf had started to carefully examine the wounds on Yoongi’s body, hissing in phantom pain. “You can’t walk like this, Yoongi. I…I can ca-“

“Do you need help with that?” Namjoon’s voice was soft but Jungkook jerked away in surprise, nonetheless. “Y-yes, he needs help. Can you?” Jungkook stumbled over his own words right away, knowing that Yoongi would probably not admit his helplessness, especially not after what had happened. But Namjoon was known for his knowledge about anything medical (as he had helped Jungkook with many of his wounds before) and he was the only bigger wolf around that was strong enough to carry Yoongi without hurting him. “Haven’t seen you in a while,” Namjoon smirked as he got closer to his former pack member, “You’ve always had a way to piss off Jin, one way or another.  But I’m glad you’re here.”

“Nah, I got this.” Yoongi smiled and reached out for Namjoon to nuzzle into him. They both knew he was lying but Yoongi wanted to at least try and keep his face. 

Nonetheless he stayed close so that he could lean onto Namjoon. He wondered if it was better to change into human form, but he was scared that the shift would put even more strain on his broken bones. And they hurt like hell already. Concentrating on it made him feel nauseous and lightheaded so he tried his best to avoid it. Instead he started hobbling after Namjoon who lead him to his place.

Jungkook was so worried for Yoongi, feeling just as light-headed because of the events of the day. He sniffled quietly, whimpering with every painful hiss of Yoongi’s, trying to help him as much as he could. He watched helplessly how Namjoon turned back, quickly putting on some clothes as he lifted up Yoongi onto his bed as careful as he could. Jungkook turned soon after, just following whatever the other did and walking around the bed to be at Yoongi’s side. He was caressing over his fur, tears still rolling down his cheeks, blaming himself for how hurt the wolf was.

“I need you to turn for me,” Namjoon ordered, letting his hands carefully wander down to his leg,  “Try and relax as much as you can. Do it slowly.”

Yoongi laughed, a rough, baying sound. “Yeah, I’ll just relax.” Namjoon was right though, he couldn’t really help Yoongi when the fur was in the way and splinting a fracture was easier on humans as on a wolf, so he had to comply if he liked it or not. Yoongi took a deep breath and tried to concentrate on anything else but the pain. He still screamed when the transformation reached his leg and the splintered bones shifted under his skin.

“I’m so sorry, I’m sorry,” Jungkook was mumbling under his breath, trying to be as strong as he could but he was failing at it miserably. He couldn’t stand seeing Yoongi hurting like this. Taking Yoongi’s hand in his, he kissed his palm softly, holding it to his own cheek. “It’s all my fault…” Jungkook murmured, leaving a few more soft kisses on his wrist, while Namjoon was examining Yoongi from head to toe. When Jimin came back into their room, carrying a box with all of their medical equipment, Namjoon thanked him quietly before he started getting to work. “Jungkookie, sweety, why don’t you go and help Jimin prepare some herbs and,” Namjoon turned to look at his boyfriend, “Can you make some ointment to help heal the wounds, please, baby.”

Yoongi wanted to tell Jungkook that this absolutely wasn’t his fault and that he’d do it again in a heartbeat if it went that Jungkook could be with him and that he was the happiest wolf in the world right now but the pain made his jaws lock up and it was difficult to speak. His breath came irregular and heavy and he was glad that Namjoon was there, someone he trusted so that he could let go.

Jimin took the opportunity to take Jungkook aside, taking the younger out of the room. He held him by the shoulders and turned him towards him, his face worried as he spoke quickly. “Listen, you don’t have to panic; with the state Yoongi is in he won’t be able to claim you. You’re safe for tonight. And till tomorrow I can up with a plan. I…we can manage something anything for you to escape this. You won’t have to live with him if you don’t want, we’ll make sure that you’ve got somewhere to run to; there are empty caves near the waterfalls, and we could bring you food until.. until Yoongi.. maybe he dies from this? He could get a sepsis and.. I’m.. I’m so sorry I couldn’t do anything before, but we won’t let you down Kookie, I promise!”

Jungkook froze in shock, his eyes wide as he tried to follow Jimin’s panicked words. “W-what?” The younger furrowed his brows, “A plan? For….for what? But…I am his now?” Jungkook gulped heavily, way too much in shock to get what Jimin was really saying. “You said yourself…I…I need to be with him.” His eyes flickered around the room, the words slowly sinking in. “What do you mean h- he can die from it?”

“Yeah, it’s true that you’re his and.. and I’m sorry, if I had known that he would come here I wouldn’t have told you that you shouldn’t be scared and how everything would be alright if you just went with it .. I’m so sorry!” He hugged the younger who was still stiff and Jimin interpreted it as being in shock. “We won’t let him rob you of a happy life in a pack! There’s no way we should have let a solitary wolf participate I don’t know what Jin has been thinking to let him join, probably that no one has a chance against the black one! I’ll talk to him maybe he can annul this because obviously a lone wolf can’t provide properly for a young wolf. Maybe the black one would take you in then and… Kook, Kookie, are you alright?” He had noticed how the other was becoming paler by the minute “We’ll handle it, I promise you won’t have to go with him!”

“B-but I love him?” Jungkook’s voice was soft, his expression confused because he didn’t understand why Jimin was so adamant on helping him to escape now when all he wanted was for him to find a mate in the first place. It had been a long day and Jungkook was exhausted, dehydrated, still under shock from the fight and the adrenaline that was slowly ebbing down was making him shiver. All he wanted was to go back to Yoongi. “I love him, Jimin. I did, long before this.” Jungkook pulled Jimin away from him and held him, his eyes searching his, “I’ve been with him the whole time…when I was away, you know? When you covered for me. I was with Yoongi. I don’t know how it happened, or when and I don’t know what made him change his mind, but I think he loves me, too? He came back for me.” Jungkook averted his gaze, tears dwelling in his eyes, his heart happily skipping a few beats. “Please, help me to make this ointment. I need Yoongi.” Looking up at Jimin, he quietly added, “He was there for me when no one else was. I think I knew he was the one long before, but when he stood there fighting for me…my heart did this thing, you know…the thing you said your heart did with Namjoon?” Jungkook bit his lip, his cheeks dusting in a rose color.

Jimin’s eyes widened when Jungkook’s words sunk in. “You’ve been with Yoongi before? And he’s.. he’s your mate?” He had expected anything but this. In his fear and worry he had already seen Jungkook starving because Yoongi couldn’t provide for him or Jungkook crying himself to sleep every night because he was lonely and scared of the wild wolf - that the two would have ‘clicked’ right away and even before the mating ceremony had even started was tilting his world upside down.

“Oh..” with a soft exhale the tension eased out of his shoulders. Now that he didn’t have to frantically search for an out for the young wolf he could finally relax again. “So.. you’re not scared of him?” He didn’t need to ask Jungkook if he was sure about Yoongi being his mate. You felt it. There was no way one could interpret it, the pull just behind your heart that made you ache for your partner until it got soothed by wolf licks or human kisses.

“Nope,” Jungkook said with a proud expression, “I never really was…He always calls me ‘ball of fluff’ but I think he’s the fluffiest.” He blushed even more, “ Don’t tell him I said that, though. But Yoongi really isn’t as bad as everyone says he is. He even showed me how to hunt!  And…other things. But that doesn’t matter. I bet you will like him when you get to know him.” Jungkook giggled a little nervously and then pointed at the kitchen, “Will you help me now?”

“Yeah…yes of course.” Jimin could only stare at Jungkook’s blush and the way he happily talked about Yoongi - just the way Jimin knew he spoke about Namjoon: loving, fond, proud. However, hearing Jungkook say that Yoongi had taught him “other things” had him furrow his brow. He leaned in and sniffed Jungkook discreetly.

Nope, still a virgin.

With a relieved sigh he took the herbs that Namjoon would need to make that ointment. At first he had thought that Namjoon was helping Yoongi because Namjoon tried to do the correct thing and help Jungkook’s new family but with Jungkook saying that Yoongi wasn’t that bad maybe Namjoon knew the other as well? They had sure seemed more friendly than you’d be with a stranger.

Meanwhile, up in his room, Namjoon was sweating, his eyes narrowed in concentration as he was finally fixing up Yoongi’s legs as much as he could, wrapping it in a bandage in the end. “There’s no way you can hunt for a while…not until you’re fully healed. I’m sorry,” He said and finally leaned back, looking over the treated wounds once more, making sure he hadn’t missed a spot. Namjoon got up and over to his desk where he always had a carafe filled with fresh water and poured it into a glass. Walking back to Yoongi, he sat down at the edge of the bed, giving it over to the wounded wolf. “You should still rest for today. You can stay in our room for that. I know you probably want to go home soon though. There’s no way you would stay for a few days, huh?” Smiling at his old friend, Namjoon sighed, “Don’t worry, I’ll bring you meat for a while, check up on your wounds and Jimin will teach our little…I’m sorry, your little fluff…” He winked at Yoongi teasingly, “…how to prepare the ointment. I’ve heard he’s not the best at hunting and Jimin will probably want to make sure you’re treating Jungkookie right. Jimin is a very caring soul. The sweetest person I know,” He blushed lightly and added quietly, “Don’t take it the wrong way. He only knows the stories Jin told to make sure new wolves kept away from you…,which didn’t work very well with Jungkookie, I guess.”

Thankfully Yoongi accepted the water and greedily gulped it down. He felt too hot and cold at the same time. The adrenaline fading had the exhaustion and tiredness hit him full force, but he couldn’t let go while he wasn’t absolutely certain that Jungkook was taken care of. “Nah, he’s right to be afraid of me. I’m going to wreak havoc on anyone who’s trying to take Jungkook from me. He’s mine now. Officially. So, I’m going to hold onto him for as long as he lets me.” His lips felt dry and cracked when he licked over them. He reached out for Namjoon but just managed to grab his sleeve. “I’m - I don’t think I can stay conscious for much longer, but I don’t want to leave him alone, especially not in his mating night. Can you make sure that he stays close please? That someone’s with him? That... that he knows I love him?”

Namjoon nodded at that, “Of course. I’ll make sure he stays with you tonight. Jimin and I just going to sleep on the couch tonight. Don’t worry.” He smiled genuinely taking the blanket to pull it over Yoongi’s body to keep him warm. “Just rest now,” His voice was soft as he took the water from the solitary wolf again, watching the other close his eyes in exhaustion. He cleaned up all the stuff he used, putting back into the little medical case, before he carefully closed the door behind him, letting the other rest for a while and searching for the young wolf.

Yoongi’s eyes fell almost immediately after Namjoon’s promise, the darkness pulling him under while there was still a smile tugging on his lips. He might be dead tied and in pain, but he had destroyed the mate off and won Jungkook and when he’d wake up then there would be nothing separating them from each other. Not even Jin’s stupid rules.

Jungkook came back into the room a while later after they finished preparing the ointment and he had gotten a bucket of lukewarm water and a towel with him. Quietly, he walked up to the bed where Yoongi was sleeping, looking peacefully if not for the bruises on his body and sat down on the edge. He still couldn’t process anything of what had happened, still a bit too shivery, feeling cold and exhausted while he dipped the little towel into the water to clean up Yoongi’s face and get rid of the sweat that was forming – either from stress or fever. “Please, be okay,” Jungkook mumbled, leaning forward to place a kiss on his forehead, “I can’t do this without you.”

Carefully Namjoon put a carafe of fresh water on the table. He had refilled it to make sure that Jungkook wouldn’t have to run through the camp of foreign wolves alone if Yoongi needed some more. For a moment he just stood and watched, how gentle Jungkook was touching Yoongi’s face, how soft he spoke to him. He had no doubt that the two of them were real mates. “Don’t worry Jungkook.” The younger had been so immersed in caring for Yoongi that he flinched at the sound of Namjoon’s voice. “Yoongi will be fine. Wolves heal fast. Especially if they have someone caring for them.” He smiled softly. “As Yoongi can’t answer you any questions that you might have now I’ll try to give you a little overview of what will happen now; you should stay with Yoongi during the night, you don’t have to stay awake, but you should be close to him.” Just in case someone would try to mess with them, either by abducting Kook while Yoongi was unconscious or by insisting that they couldn’t be mates if they hadn’t followed the rules completely. “Then tomorrow Jin will send the two of you off. Most of the foreign wolves will be gone by then but some might stay to greet you and wish you luck for your new life. Then you can go home.”

Jungkook gulped heavily. His eyes had flickered back and forth between Namjoon and Yoongi all while he listened attentively. “Home,” The young wolf repeated in thought, when sudden tears were clouding his view. A smile pulled at his lips and then he looked at the other again, “I think I found it. With him.” He laughed softly, wiping away the tears with the paws of his sweater. Caressing over Yoongi’s soft cheeks, Jungkook let his hand fall down to his mate’s lacing their fingers together. Jungkook could feel the physical pull that was urging him on to lay down next to Yoongi, next to his mate. His heart ached painfully and beautifully at the same time, the love and worry mixing into one. But before Namjoon could leave, Jungkook spoke up again, “Do you think maybe one day…that Jin and…Yoongi...that it will be peaceful again. No borders?”

Namjoon was about to leave respectfully to let Jungkook and Yoongi have their mate night in peace (even if nothing would happen between them it was still a rules to let them be) when Jungkook spoke up again. Namjoon thought for a moment and then answered honestly. “Jin is easy to offend and just as easily carries grudges. So, I fear that it won’t change drastically right away. He likes you, however. And I don’t think he’s going to risk losing you completely when you are so close to our borders. So maybe he’ll give you permission to visit us even though you’d officially not be a pack member any more. And I guess Yoongi doesn’t mind Jimin and Tae visiting you either - and I already told him I’d bring you food those first two weeks that he’s unable to walk properly. It’s not good to live off berries and mushrooms as a newly mated couple. You’ll need your strength.” He looked amused as it took a second for his words to sink and then continued, “So basically the border doesn’t really count any longer except for Jin keeping his face and Yoongi his pride. But even they will grow tired of it eventually I think. It just might take a little longer. But you’ll still have us. All of us. We won’t just leave you, Kook. You’re part of the family, mated or not.”

Jungkook bit his lip, blushing slightly and he quickly turned to look at Yoongi again. He mumbled a quiet ‘thank you’, not tearing his gaze off his mate and hearing the door shut seconds after. Jungkook sighed and got around the bed, where there was more space and carefully laid down next to him. As he didn’t want to hurt Yoongi in any way, but still keep close, he cuddled closer to his side, lacing their hands together not too close for him to get hurt in any way. Jungkook was hoping that what Namjoon had said was true, that a wolf would heal faster with his mate by his side – he couldn’t remember much about that lesson when Jin taught him and he was way too tired himself. So, he placed a kiss on Yoongi’s shoulder. “I’m here,” He whispered softly against his skin, “I won’t leave your side.” Yawning tiredly, he pulled the blanket over his shoulders a little more and finally, for the first time fell asleep on Yoongi’s side.

When Yoongi woke up Jungkook’s scent was so strong that he felt a rush of happiness and fondness before he even opened his eyes. He felt better already and although his leg still hurt he didn’t feel as wrecked as last night. He would heal. They would be okay. When he opened his eyes Jungkook’s face was right in front of him, beautiful and relaxed and he took the opportunity to nose along kook’s jaw in a loving manner. His. Wholly his.

Jungkook was awake right away. For a second he was scared that Yoongi could need him, but the moment he could feel him inch closer, nuzzling his face against his neck, the younger wolf smiled. “I was so scared, Yoongi. I can’t believe you did that. I hate you so much,” Jungkook kissed him on the tip of his nose and then his lips, “Don’t ever do this to my heart again.” Jungkook opened his eyes again and cupped Yoongi’s cheeks softly, while eying a few of the bruises, “Do you need anything? Are you still hurting? Do you want me to get Namjoon?”

Yoongi smiled sleepily. “You hate me, hu? Then it’s good I don’t have to pull shit like that again. You know mates are forever. So, you’re mine forever now and I don’t have to fight for you again. Unless you want me to - then we can go playfighting.” He kissed him back, quick and sweet, in between every sentence he answered: “You” -Kiss- “Not when you’re with me” -Kiss-  “Only if you want him to watch.” Then he snuggled into Kook with a full bodied attack (that only left out his leg of course).

“Yoongi!” Jungkook giggled falling back a little as he held onto his mate tightly, “Be careful, please. And yes, I know. I never wanted it any other way.” Jungkook caressed over his hair, letting Yoongi rest his head on his chest. “I told you, I should stay with you. I knew it already when you kissed me on my neck. Didn’t you feel it, too?” Jungkook’s voice turned into a soft whisper, “Jimin told me about how he knew it when he saw the way Namjoon was fighting for him and Taehyung felt the same way about Hoseok but me…I knew it when you kissed my neck. My heart pulled me towards you already. I think,” Jungkook kissed the top of Yoongi’s hair in midst sentence, “Even if you would have never shown up, no one else would have been able to claim me. I was yours already, only you didn’t see it.” Jungkook bit his lip at the memory, feeling the hurt and disappointment like a phantom pain washing over him for a moment, “B-but you see it now.”

“Yeah, I do. I tried not to because I thought that... I wouldn’t be good for you. That you’d live better in a regular pack and that all I had to do to make you happy was stand back and let someone else take you home. But… I couldn’t. I couldn’t stand the thought, it made me crazy to think that I might never see you again. So, I came. And then I had to fight, no matter what because I just… had to…” He absentmindedly nipped at Jungkook’s neck. “Cause I’m yours too. Just like you are mine.” He couldn’t remind himself often enough, it felt like heaven on his tongue to say it.

“Everyone is scared of my boyfriend,” Jungkook giggled cutely and kissed his cheek, “You’ve never seemed too scary to me…maybe it was supposed to be like this. My mate is the big, white, solitary wolf.” He loved saying it, knowing that he finally found someone that he could call his home and his love, his mate, his everything. His heart was doing somersaults with each kiss that felt like a sweet promise. “Can we go home?” Jungkook whispered against his lips, not wanting to part from them.

Yoongi grumbled, very obviously not pleased with the thought of letting go of Jungkook just now. Though of course he was ready to fulfill Jungkook’s wishes whenever he could. “Yeah, we can. We just have to say goodbye to Jin. Not because I want to. But it’s the rules. And we do play by the rules, don’t we?” He chuckled, “At least for as long as it guarantees that they’ll stay off our asses. Cause yours is definitely mine.” He growled again, hungry this time, his eyes glowing with something that the pain of his leg had obscured till now. He gently nudged Kook before letting him go. “Got up then, sleepyhead. I’ll be right behind you.”

Jungkook blushed at that, quickly getting off bed and towards the door, waiting for Yoongi. There was nothing much in this house but a few clothes maybe that Jungkook needed, but Namjoon had already told him that he would bring them later so he could focus on his new mate. Turning at the doorstep, Jungkook pushed his snout into Yoongi’s fur deeply just because he could and without a care in the world as he listened to Jin’s goodbye. It didn’t feel like one. All of them knew, including Jin, that things would change soon - just like Namjoon explained it before.

It had been horrible to change back into wolf form with his leg only half healed but it was expected to be in the same form as his mate was and Yoongi would also have felt a little too ‘naked’ standing in front of Jin with just skin. The fur was his protection, his buffer between him and the world. So, it worked, to stand there and hear Jin say his goodbyes. He had been a little nervous, thinking that Jin might throw in some carefully crafted insults or try to make him cause a scene but to his surprise the speech was short and intimate. It felt as if Jin - even though he definitely wasn’t happy with how it had ended and still had his differences with Yoongi - was really wishing Jungkook the best for his future. They all knew that they would see each other again pretty soon.

After that they could go home. Or hobble at snail’s pace in Yoongi’s case. He was proud that he had managed to walk slow enough for his limp to be not that noticeable during the official part in front of the others but as soon as they had passed the line of trees were the other wolves wouldn’t be able to see them he groaned, slumping a little.

“Fucking leg.” He sighed. “I’m sorry, it’ll take a while till we arrive at home.” It didn't feel that long though with Kook by his side, helping him, being there for him. Just the knowledge of his presence made Yoongi feel better.

Jungkook pushed the door to Yoongi’s cottage open, already feeling like home the moment, he stepped in. “You should rest a little,” Jungkook stood in front of his wolf boyfriend, that still looked a little too shaken for his own liking and maneuvered him into Yoongi’s bedroom (that he barely ever used because he usually slept in his wolf form in his self-made bed of sheets and cushions). The younger quickly got everything he needed to take care of Yoongi, while the white wolf slowly turned back letting out a painful hiss that made Jungkook move even faster to get back to him. He quickly grabbed something to drink, some food and the ointment he had prepared. “Don’t exhaust yourself,” Jungkook came back and settled next to him on the bed, pushing Yoongi against his chest to make him lay down again, “We’ve got all the time in the world now. I won’t leave your side, okay? I’m stuck on you now, right?”

“Yeah, we are. Stuck with each other.” His face turned from his content smile to something a little more serious, “I mean it’s what the rules say but I left because… because Jin and I had a fallout. About exactly that to be honest. The strict rules. The way some omegas were treated. How tightly life was organized and dictated by all of this traditional stuff. And while some of them still make sense, even to me - some of them don’t. It’s actually a little funny that I came to play by Jin’s rules and beat him at his own game. But I want you to know that I have loved you before the fight - and I’ll love you still even if the rules won’t comply any longer or the wolf community calls off the old traditions. Because I would have come for you no matter what and I’ll love you like this, always, no matter the circumstances.” He tried to sit up a little to look Jungkook properly in the eyes, “And I know that you love me too but... if that ever changes, then I won’t force you to stay with me. You are free, you’ll always be free with me. You can be your own master if you want. Unless you enjoy giving me some control over you of course…” There was a flash behind his eyes, the wolf part of him trying to push towards the surface, hungry, dying to claim. Still Yoongi wanted this to be Jungkook’s decision. He would give Jungkook whatever the other wanted.

Jungkook pushed Yoongi’s hair back, his gaze wandering over his face as if he wanted to remember every detail of it. “I’ve always felt free with you,” The younger leaned in and kissed his lips softly, the tingling feeling in the pit of his stomach only growing. He had suppressed it all night, more scared about losing Yoongi than anything else but now that he was sure that they would stay together, that Yoongi would heal, his own instincts were surfacing. Jungkook giggled and nuzzled his face against his mate’s jaw and neck, “I’m yours.” He placed a soft kiss on Yoongi’s neck, licking along his neck, feeling the heat radiating from him, the shiver in his mate’s body. “I know you’ll keep me safe from now on. No one else but you.” Kissing him deeply, Jungkook only pulled away to look at Yoongi again, “I don’t want to be with someone else. No other wolf should even think about having me. Claim me, Yoongi, please.”

It was everything he had wanted to hear, needed to hear for the wolf to break free and take over. Jungkook was his. Would always be his. His friend, his love, his mate.

He nosed along Kook’s jaw like he had did before although this time the atmosphere was different, charged. He wouldn’t stop at nips and caresses. This time he would go all the way, bite him properly, claim him, mark him forever as his. His body felt heated and tense, as if every nerve and cell were waiting for him to do it, to consummate their connection for themselves and everyone else to feel and remember. He was leaning in in his fangs so close to his skin that the younger could feel the hot breath on his neck. He could feel Jungkook’s shiver like it was his own, shaking him to the core. He was ready to make Jungkook his own. Yoongi savored this moment as he knew that nothing could come between them anymore. They were one. The warmth spread throughout his body, preparing him for what was about to come. Then he let his teeth sink into Jungkook’s skin.

A/N: Another story is ending :) We really hope you like it! Leave us a comment down below! And thank you for all your support and comments, we really loved reading all of them! It makes us so happy ;; Don’t forget to check our WIPs and Updates Page to see what’s next and coming up. We always add stories as soon as there’s something new being written. There’s a few things coming your way soon!

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[a-good-finder]

the malec playlist ♥

Ok, so. Hi!

I’m not very big on fandom things, so bear with me. Months ago, I created this playlist on Spotify with songs that touch my Malec-strings. I’m here to share it with you lot, in hopes you all can cry at them with me or even point out other songs which you consider Malec-y.

This is it: the malec playlist :)

Below, you have a list of all the songs, some with excerpts cos I’m a bitch for lyrics that remind me of my favorite couple. It’s a very eclectic playlist, you see.

[Btw, some things might be off or wrong cos not only is English not my first language I’m feeling too lazy to search for spelling and etc, sorry >D]

So, we’ve got... 

- All of Me, John Legend

- Little Do You Know, Alex & Sierra (due to this amazing fanvid)

- Grow Old with Me, Tom Odell (cRY)

- “Read All About It, Pt. III”, Emeli Sandé :’)

- Nobody Wants to be Lonely, Rick Martin & Christina Aguilera [sERIOUSLY, look: your heart is cold and lost the will to love, like a broken arrow (...) time is precious and it's slipping away, and I've been waiting for you all of my life (...)  can you hear my voice, do you hear my song, it's a seranade, so your heart can find me, ohh. and suddenly you're flying down the stairs into my arms, baby, ohh (me singing and crying this sHIT IS GOOD)]

- Shape of My Heart, Backstreet Boys

- OBVIOUSLY War of Hearts, Ruelle (um hino desses)

- True Colors, Cyndi Lauper :’’’’’’)

- Wide Eyed, Billy Lockett (3uheuwhuhuehuehuehruheu3heu)

- Two Men in Love, The Irrepressibles (so so so so bEAUTIFUL)

- And Then You, Greg Laswell (seeeeeee:  and how my dreams they spin me 'round, and how my dreams they let me down, and how my thoughts they spin me 'round, and how my thoughts they let me down... then there's you, then there's you, then there's you, then there's you...)

- Duet (feat. Stephanie Briggs), Penny and Sparrow (ok I’m sorry but tHIS ONE IS GOLD: because I’ve seen you, and I know you, and I’m not going anywhere)

- Strong, One Direction

- What Makes You Beautiful, One Direction (heuhuehuhe)

- You & I, One Direction

- Can’t Help Falling in Love, Elvis Presley (wISE MEN SAY ONLY FOOLS RUSH IN aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah)

- Better Love, Hozier

- Can You Hold Me, NF & Britt Nicole (this one has become such a favorite, seriously, listen to it)

- Old Skin, Ólafur Arnalds (I’ve heard this song first in an Evak fanvid, but if fits bOTH so well...)

- I Choose You, Sara Bareilles (#ImmortalHusbands)

- I’m Yours, Alessia Cara (BUT HEAR ME OUT!!!  She says: cause I’ve had my heart broken before, and I promised I would never let me hurt anymore. but I tore down my walls, and opened my doors, and made room for one. so baby I’m yours, and honestly the whole song is so dhjfhjfbjhbfj I cry a little)

- Do I Wanna Know?, Arctic Monkeys (I’ve taken this one from another Malec playlist on spotify, Take You As You Are, it fits pretty well lol)

- Certain Things, James Arthur (this is such a fanvid song lol)

- Love You Any Less, Rag’n’Bone Man (mAN, another one from Take You As You Are, and it’s so so so so touching, seriously; listen to it while you watch the 2x15 scene ;D)

- Underneath, Adam Lambert

- OBVI: The Other Side, Ruelle (2x18 break-up vibes)

- Brave, Riley Pearce (yes, the one from their last 2x18 scene, but just listen to it)

- Vulnerable, The Saturdays (same vein as “I’m Yours”, very Magnus-y)

- Surrender, Natalie Taylor (since we’re talking about Malec-break up, look at this fanvid)

- Beautiful Mess, Kristian Kostov (another amazing fanvid :D)

- Run Away With Me, Carly Rae Jepsen (such a fun song)

- Nobody ‘Til You, Lindsay Lohan (I mean:  'til you I was nothing but lonely nights, there was nothing but sad goodbyes for me to fall through. come true, my dreams are awakening, somebody is making me the only one in the room. what nobody could do, nobody 'til you)

- Hurry Up!, Superfruit (I’ve seen this one in a very cute gifset, but for the life of me can’t I find it D:, but the bit was this one: hey baby, I've never been in love, but I wanna be, I wanna be, so hurry up)

- Never Gonna Change, Broods (I’ve always loved this song, and it made me really happy to be able to add it to this list)

- Wildfire, SYML (HONESTLY SERIOUSLY FULL-HEARTLY nothing is as beautiful as the love in this song. Someone on tumblr once pointed out how Malec-y it is, and just- listen to its softeness)

- Turning Page, Sleeping At Last (#weddingfeels, also: nothing makes me stronger than your fragile heart?????? I mean, shit!)

- In the Name of Love, Martin Garrix (heart emojis)

- Venus, Sleeping At Last (after a while, I thought I’d never find you. I convinced myself that I would never find you. when suddenly I saw you. at first I thought you were a constellation. I made a map of your stars, then I had a revelation. you’re as beautiful as endless, you’re the universe I’m helpless in)

- Only You, Cheat Codes & Little Mix (dUDE)

- Atlas: Two, Sleeping at Last (first time I heard this song I couldn’t stop thinking of Malec and /sigh/, help: I know exactly how the rule goes, put my mask on first. no, I don’t want to talk about myself- tell me where it hurts. I just want to build you up, build you up til you’re good as new. and maybe one day I will get around to fixing myself too ring any bells?)

- Bloom, Troye Sivan (hueheuheuheueh)

- I Found, Amber Run

- Saturn, Sleeping At Last (crying forever)

- Stronger, Proper Gentleman & Mr. Gabriel (mAN, woMAN: I am not here to stay, I am not far away, and I can be with you if you need me. I wish that I could say I feel your pain, lost in your shame, and the hardest part is believing... you are stronger than you look in the picture. you are brave, even as you are falling apart)

- Don’t Forget About Me, CLOVES (played during 2x5, Jocelyn’s funeral)

- Show Me What I’m Looking For, Carolina Liar

- When You Look Me In The Eyes (I can’t access the Jonas Brothers’ version, maybe it’s cos my spotify is Brazilian or something, so this is a cover, but dANG this song)

- Fear of the Water, SYML (ok, listen!!! so much sense!!! and also watch this beautiful incredible fanvid)

- Take Care, Florence + the Machine (Drake’s is also so touching and soft and beautiful, yes, but I kinda like the violins in this one lol)

- Dressed In Black, Sia (added yesterday, but everyweek it seems I find another song for this playlist-- if you’ve never heard it, take a look at this chorus: you found me dressed in black, hiding way up at the back. life had broken my heart into pieces. you took my hand in yours, you started breaking down my walls, and you covered my heart in kisses. I thought life passed me by, missed my tears, ignored my cries. life had broken my heart, my spirit. and then you crossed my path, you quelled my fears, you made me laugh. then you covered my heart in kisses)

That’s it, so far. I hope listening to it is an eye-opening experience as it always is for me, and we can talk about it all in caps? That’d be nice.

Also, #SaveShadowhunters :D

EDITED, October 13th.

- Telepathy, Christina Aguilera, from the Get Down, which should also have been saved (yes, it’s a Thizzee song, but dAMN)

- Never Enough, Loren Allred, from the Greatest Show Man (another musical, and also another dAMN, just listen to it)

- Come What May, from yet aNOTHER musical and also from Glee (yes, both versions) cos both are amazing and deserve to be listened to always.

#malec #magnus bane #alec lightwood #shadowhunters #saveshadowhunters #sh #savesh #♥ #tracklist

[juunshua]

henlo! can u post a gif tutorial cause your gifs are so pretty and look amazing, even on mobile which messes up with everythjng 😆

ahh anon u flatter me!! thank you for your kind words!!! i honestly have ways to go, but it means a lot that u say this thank you 

so for starters i have a mac + photoshop cs5 so a lot of this tutorial will be based on what you do for that, but i’m sure u could do the same thing on pcs  (actually pcs have more programs available so i highly recommend, if u have a pc, finding a tutorial that is based around pcs) and other photoshop versions too! but i think the general process is still the same, a different tutorial might just be more nuanced^^

1. Finding/downloading your video~so for normal mp4 videos on youtube i use this website. it’s pretty useful it can download from actually a wide variety of sites like naver (up till 1080p!) ~for v app videos i use this site~ts files i find on kpopexciting or kpop24hrs (u need an account for kpop24hrs i think to download video but! signing up isnt difficult and its nothing fishy. i use it a lot esp for older ts files it has a good archive, kpopexciting tends to be faster though.)~the higher quality files you find the better! i find that it tends to go mp4~honestly finding the right high quality video is a HUGE part of making gifs look nice2. Extracting your video~there are many many many ways to extract your video but I highly recommend downloading avisynth! There are ways to download it for pc! avisynth is beautiful because it doesn’t really reduce the quality of your video to the extent that photoshop does, plus it can extract 60fps from ts files. some gifs ive made through avisynth ( x x x ) if you’re interested in avisynth further, tumblr user @/brandinator is a good place to start! if you want to know more regarding how to use it and a different tutorial through that, let me know! ~now i’m not sure if there is an avisynth tutorial for mac anymore, BUT theres another great program, vapoursynth, that mac users can look into. here’s a tutorial that i’ve found~Before I got avisynth I used VLC player for ts files but I had to basically screenshot each frame individually. Some gifs I’ve made through this method ( x x x ). these gifs are 60fps only bc i found a user who uploaded the ts file in 60fps. usually you cant get 60fps w/o avisynth. but this is also me saying that if you cant get avisynth or vapoursynth, there are still ways to work around it i think! one of my fav giffers for the longest time didnt use either!! and sharpening and coloring were always on point.~I think pcs can use kmplayer? id look into that if you have a pc~for normal mp4 videos I just use photoshops ‘import video frames to layers’ option (under file in the menubar)! you can use avisynth as well, but for me it takes forever to extract what i want in avisynth (minimum like a minute ish), whereas ps can get the part of the video i want to gif in a couple of seconds. I think it’s self explanatory but basically you find the video you want to extract, find where u want ur gif to start, and for photoshop cs5, you hit the ‘shift’ key and let the part u want giffed in the video play. when youre done u lift the shift key and hit ‘ok’ (idk if it differs for different versions of ps). i extract all!!! frames!! it makes it look smoother too :)

3. Coloring/Sharpening/Cropping/Etc~now this is the step that I can’t really give a tutorial on because honestly it varies for everyone! but i feel that this is the step that a lot of ppl need guidance with (me included) because it is the hardest step, probably because it is so ‘up in the air’ for lack of a better word? there is no one right way of doing it the possibilities are literally endless but here are some tips~Coloring:       ~most important rule: don’t whitewash ur gifs!!       ~other than that, the world is yours.       ~honestly have fun with this part! coloring is something that i haven’t fully learned yet       ~i tend to play around mainly with the curves, selective color, hue/saturation, and color balance layers       ~you can also download psds other ppl have made (i dont do this myself) and use those!      ~also i feel that a lot of the times, the right coloring can make ur gif seem higher quality. coloring can also play a role in reducing gif size if u do it correctly.      ~honestly this part is just a lot of experimentation, over the course of a gifset and over the course of time in general. some people find their coloring style easily, but i was not one of those people. ive spent a lot of time trying to figure out how to adjust what layers to get the colors that i want and i think only as of this era ive been able to execute the coloring i had pictured in my mind. so patience is a virtue!!! ~Sharpening:      ~ah yes my biggest enemy: sharpening      ~first things first, i sharpen my gifs using smart sharpen + topaz                  ~settings for my smart sharpen are 500%; 0.4                 ~check the box that says ‘more accurate’ and i personally remove ‘gaussian blur’      ~some people also use topaz denoise, and/or topaz clean     ~ honestly topaz is a lifesaver for me bc it smoothes out a lot of grain that can be introduced via coloring! also!!! it can reduce gif size by a lot!!!!!!!!!!!          ~on topaz denoise i hit the ‘light’ setting on the side and adjust the settings accordingly          ~idk how to use topaz clean even though I have it, because it refuses to work          ~to apply topaz you have to hit ‘flatten frames into layers’                ~some gifs i’ve made with just topaz and no avisynth ( x  x x x)        ~there are ways to make it look nice without topaz but i’ve forgotten how after i got it               ~id duplicate the frame then use smart sharpen and ‘gaussian blur’ under ‘blur’                       ~then adjust the opacity levels in some way.                       ~my settings for the opacity levels aren’t good so i’ll refrain from sharing               ~some gifs ive made through this method ( x x )        ~last but not least i’ll bring up avisynth again. avisynth is nice at preserving video quality                 ~a lot of ppl i know say they don’t even sharpen gifs out of avisynth                 ~here are some gifs i have made with avisynth + topaz ( x x x x x x x )    ~honestly when it comes to sharpening, im still floundering with it. my sharpening needs a lot of work but, amongst the people who i consider good sharpners, most of them use avisynth, topaz denoise and/or clean, and smart sharpen! so all the resources are here !

~Cropping:     ~it’s super important to follow tumblr dimensions otherwise gifs come out looking grainy! even when they’re not ! (case in point: x in which i used 168 instead of 178 for the dimensions)~Timing:   ~Timing is so important!!! I almost forgot!! Always make sure u dont have duplicate frames for starters! for 60fps source videos i use .03, for mp4s i typically use .04 but sometimes the frame rate is kinda funky so you may have to go slower accordingly! and the important thing about timing is that if u use smart object, when u save ur gif, it’ll be in a different timing? like .04 gets changed to .07 but in order to fix that, u can simply just save ur gif in the wrong timing, and then reopen the gif in ps, simply change the timing to what u want on all ur frames, and then save it again!! idk if that made any sense but laskdjf this was the biggest mystery for me for so long omg4. Saving the gif~personally the save settings I use are “Selective/Adaptive” ; “Diffusive”; Dither: 100%; 256 colors. sometimes this makes the gif super grainy so i use “pattern” instead of “diffusive” in those instances5. Pray Perseverance   ~a lot of the time when you’re giffing, gifs won’t come out the way you want it (i’m sure for every gifset i’ve uploaded on tumblr, there’s a gifset that i started making and never finished because it looked really bad). idk sometimes it feels like photoshop has its own will, sharpenings wont always work the same way each time, video quality won’t be the way you want it, i’m honestly still very experimental right now I don’t have ps figured out at all. so yeah…sometimes all u can do is that when u hit that save for web button (that ruins everything alskf), pray that ps doesnt mess it up too bad ahahaha but also that even when it does, its okay and you can try again! or try something new!

this is a super generic guide! let me know if you need more information! 

#anon #replies

[leiandcharles]

F, G, M, N!

F - What’s the longest you’ve ever been in a fandom? 

7 years? I got into the One Tree Hill fandom in about the third season I think and was active in it until about a year or so after the show ended so that’s about 7 years and It’s been about that long for OUAT too, I watched the first season live and was pretty quickly obsessed with the show but I didn’t find the fandom until the second season and obviously I’m still here so

G - Do you remember your first OTP, if so who was in it? 

Yep, just answered my first was Laura and Almonzo, but another one I really liked when I was young was Cory and Topanga from Boy Meets World

M - Your favorite fanart or fanartist 

Oh man these are tough because I have so many favorites and I also wouldn’t want someone to feel bad if I don’t say them. I’ll name a few but there are definitely more artists than this that I really really admire 

@scribblecat27 just yes. ugh everything is so beautiful! the watercolors the charcoals the sketches just so gorgeous. She’s made some of my all time favorite pieces, I even got one signed by Colin! & will love it always

@bleebug like every single piece is soo beautiful and so cute or so hot! that Millian one! *fans self*

@svenjaliv a mastery of colors and emotions! I mean every single new piece I see, or even old works on my dash just makes me gasp. I could stare at so many of them for hours. And also the sketches are so gorgeous!  

@queen-mabs-revenge those Millian and Milah manips ajkscnseovn I love them a lot a lot

@cocohook38 ugh such beautiful pieces. The details! Amazing! and the chibi’s are sooo cute!

@flipperbrain also has an incredible use of color and emotions and the line work is just ugh amazing! really really beautiful stuff

@lumadreamland I’m including gifs okay because her gifs are always sooo pretty! like really gdamn gorgeous colorings and every gifset has me 😍like teach me your ways! and also she is one of the gifmakers who inspired me to start making gifs in the first place!

YOU! those Alice pieces! so beautiful! the knightrook one with the letters ugh yes! and the one of Alice on her birthday, that great big dark space with her looking so little and alone with only her little candle as light and the tears! still kills me

N - Your favorite fanfiction or fanauthor

honestly its been a while since I’ve really read ff, I read little one shots here and there but I haven’t like really sat down and read anything in so long so I know I would forget people so I am only going to name a few that just come to mind (and that I know haven’t changed their urls cause that always messes me up)

@montanarosalie she’s not online anymore but man I can read her works over and over again and still sob as much as I did the first time I read it. Each one of her works is just so beautiful. 

@winterbythesea (sneaking her in here twice) I could just go on and on about characterization and perfect use of emotions (with art and fic like damn she’s good at hitting emotions) and great pace and ugh so many other things but I’ll just say two words - fuckin. brilliant.

@laschatzi beautiful beautiful beautiful works. she’s written some of my all time favorite fics. I love every single fic of hers I read, just characterization is spot on, powerful storytelling, great use of emotion and use of humor. Brilliant, beautiful, passionate, all words I’d use (and most definitely have used) to describe her fics

@killianmesmalls tears my heart out all the time with absolutely beautiful knightrook fics but then also makes it all better. I was looking through my fic tag earlier to add knightrook fics to the fyes blog and saw I once used the tag “I love how much this hurts my heart” for one of her fics and man that is accurate. her fics hurt my heart in all the best ways and I love that a lot. 

Ask me: FANDOM EDITION

#this got long but i couldn't help it #i just want to name everyone #everyone who arts or writes is just ugh amazing! #zossie #answered

[davidlynch]

how do you make your gifs?

UPDATE: 12/18/2019: I don’t make my gifs from screen recording anymore - I gif directly from the blu-ray. 😊 I’ve been meaning to find out a way to do this for a while and finally had some time to figure it out. It’s a lot more time consuming to rip the blu-ray, but the quality, movement, and color of the gifs are a lot better! 

Once I have ripped my blu-ray (making a 1:1 copy, aka no quality loss) using MakeMKV, I open up the new video file in MPlayer OSX Extended. Then I follow this tutorial and my gifs are made! 

OLD TUTORIAL: 

Hi! Here’s how I make my gifs step-by-step:

1. I choose a scene I want to gif, I then screen record it through Quicktime Player by pressing File → New Screen Recording

- Important: I only screen record my Blu-ray’s, which are 1080p (Full HD). I have in the past giffed 720p (HD), but I usually try to stick to 1080p to ensure that the gifs are high quality. ALSO you need to have an external Blu-ray player to do this

2. After I’ve picked my scene and recorded it, I import it into Photoshop (I have Photoshop CC 2018). This is how you import it: File → Import → Video Frames to Layers

3. After you click on your video, a screen will pop up and you need to press Selected Range Only, and Limit to Every 2 Frames. You then select the range you want to gif 

4. Then once my frames are in Photoshop I crop the frames by using the crop tool on the upper left of the tool bar. Make sure all your gifs are the same size

5. I then Select All the frames and make sure the time delay is set to 0.05 seconds (the playback time of the gif). Sometimes .04 is okay too, but any longer or shorter and the gif will usually look weird

- Note: The Select All button is near the bottom right of Photoshop CC 2018. It’s a square box that has 4 horizontal lines

6. Then I color grade it. I just color them myself adding: Brightness/Contrast, Levels, Exposure, Color Balance, Curves, Selective Color, Vibrance, etc. I mess around with these different adjustment layers until I like the gif. I don’t always use all of these, it just depends on what I think the gif needs   

7. Re size the frames. Select All → Image → Image Size. For single big gifs the width should be 540px, for 2 by 2 gifsets the width should be 268px. Make sure the Resolution is set to 100

8. I then Select All frames (starting from the first frame) then press Flatten Frames Into Layers 

9. I then sharpen the layers - which is also very important in making the gif look crisp. Some manually sharpen, I just use sharping actions. This can be confusing, so check out some tutorials: itsphotoshop sharpening tutorials

10. Then I’m done with the gif! I then go to File → Export → Save for Web (Legacy). Make sure you have GIF checked off, as well as Looping Options: Forever. Most of my recent gifs are made with Diffusion but I’ve also used Pattern (this is the texture of the gif). I also have Selective checked off

- Important: The gif will not play if it is bigger than 3 MB, so it has to be 3 MB or less

Hope this helps and wasn’t too confusing! :) 

Check out itsphotoshop for more tutorials   

#answered #anonymous #gif help #long post

[colethewolf]

Ah, I see Jeff Davis hasn’t changed one bit over the years. Are you curious to see his true colors? If you haven’t already gotten a glimpse...

Now, I’ve spoken a lot about my feelings towards Jeff Davis & the way he has treated his cast members, the fans, and especially the Sterek fandom. This video interview from San Diego Comic Con, where he calls out a Geekiary writer, simply because they don’t sing his praise, but rather, point out Jeff’s continuous queerbaiting attempts & mistreatment of fandom, is another glimpse into the kind of person Jeff Davis is.

The video starts with each of the interviewers at the roundtable introducing which website or blog they come from. When an interviewer from Geekiary states when they’re from, Jeff immediately jumps into some poorly rehearsed, overacted, and dramatic (much like Teen Wolf’s acting) response, where he ponders for a moment, & then calls out one of the writers at Geekiary (Farid).

Now, if you don’t already know. Farid writes for Geekiary & doesn’t hold back when it comes down to calling out Teen Wolf for the large and insulting missteps that the show takes, as well as he speaks out against mistreatment of fans & the huge queerbaiting issue within the show. And because Jeff Davis has never been one to stomach hearing the uncensored, non-sugar coated truth about his failure as a showrunner, his failure as a writer, and his failure with Teen Wolf, you can bet that Jeff Davis took this SDCC interview to rear his bitterly lopsided & vindictive head.

In the video, he completely blindsides the available Geekiary interviewer by questioning her about Farid & asks (starts at 0:15) : “why does he still write about the show? Like, what show is he watching?”. And while the interviewer is clearly & audibly uncomfortable with Jeff unprofessionally questioning her about the articles of somebody else, he continues on with the interviews.

It’s probably important to tell you guys that Teen Wolf has actually had a large history of complaining about negative reviews, about negative reception from fans, and about the embarrassing loss of viewers per episode from season to season. I honestly don’t even know how many times they’ve come out to say that fans just aren’t giving the show a chance & that they’re not watching the show correctly & that they should stop watching if they don’t like something in the show & that the show is actually getting over 8 million views per episode....okay.

So, the interview goes on. Yet towards the end, Jeff clearly isn’t done. Before he gets up from his chair to leave the table, he turns to the Geekiary interviewer and says (around the 6:20 mark) : “Tell Farid hello from me personally. It’s because he’s a Sterek fan, right? I hope all this Sterek dreams come true.”

I mean, this attitude & the clear, noticeable, radiating bitterness & vindictive nature of Jeff Davis isn’t new to me. I experienced it first hand, alongside the rest of the Sterek fandom four years ago during season 3B. Of course, I’m not personally surprised, but I feel it’s important to keep reminding you of the kind of person that Jeff Davis actually is. His hatred towards Sterek & Sterek fans continues. He hasn’t changed.

Jeff Davis is cowardice personified. He specifically took the moment to call out Farid, negative responses towards his show, and Sterek (yet again) because Farid wasn’t sitting in front of him. Plus, he knew that he could blindside that poor interviewer by targeting her. But we know he’s a coward. We know he runs & hides away from where fans get direct access to tell him how we actually feel. 

For example, Jeff Davis isn’t on Twitter anymore. He hasn’t been for years. Although, he used to have a twitter. He used to talk to fans. He used to bait Sterek all the time via his twitter. But he deleted it after fans called him out for racism. Mainly regarding his decision to cast a black woman in the role of Kali, when Kali was originally supposed to be of Indian decent. Of course, it’s wrong to have somebody play a character of a race that they are not. But Jeff Davis didn’t like hearing it. 

Additionally, he was promptly called out for the fact that both Isaac & Erica received minor backstories during their season. With Isaac coming from an abusive household & Erica suffering from her epilepsy/ transforming into somebody that gets noticed. Yet, Boyd received little to no backstory whatsoever. Jeff was called out for it on Twitter, but couldn’t deal with that either.

Jeff also used to do Q&A’s on Tumblr, but stopped doing them once he realized that people wanted to question him about ridiculous writing, about baiting, about Sterek, and about other things that he couldn’t bear to be questioned about. So he left Tumblr & actually had one of the TWPR people take the blame for certain Jeff-related issues.

As I said, cowardice runs deep within this man. And of course, his bitterness & hatred towards Sterek & Sterek fans remains prominent, as detailed with this interview. Especially the last part, where he equates Farid’s necessary & enlightening critiques to being nothing more about Sterek-- demeaning them & essentially chalking them up to bitter rants from a shipper. When in actuality, Jeff’s queerbaiting, his abusive treatment of Sterek fans, and his no-homo’d treatment of Sterek within the show is something incredibly important to critique. 

Especially when it’s 2017.

Now, I’ve made countless posts before about Jeff Davis’ feelings towards Sterek. It’s simple. He hates it. He hates the fact that he couldn’t get away with destroying it in his show after baiting it & using it for views. He hates that he wasn’t the one to come up with the idea. He hates that his show got cancelled & ultimately failed, whilst Sterek continues to thrive within a community & fandom that doesn’t give two shits about Jeff Davis & his canon disaster. 

There are some newer Sterek fans that didn’t live through the horrendous Anti-Sterek era during season 3B, and there are some fans that still hang onto the hope that Jeff Davis will reward us with Sterek becoming endgame in this final season. If anything, THIS new interview with Jeff & his incredibly embarrassing performance as a Teen Wolf-style villain towards Stereks should tell you everything that you need to know. 

Jeff Davis does NOT care about Sterek. He doesn’t care about the fans. He decided to use Sterek one last time to promo the final season & he plans to use it even more to get ratings for his last season as incentive for whatever podcast mess he wants to do after the show ends. But other than that, he will disappoint you. Jeff is going to do everything in his power to destroy Sterek & make you feel like shit. Don’t give him what he wants. Don’t buy into his transparent trickery. Don’t think he cares about fans.

This is what Jeff Davis does.

Instead, continue to thrive within the Sterek fandom. As fans, we’ve created this home for Sterek fans to enjoy. Look at all of the wonderful material that we create. The fanfiction, the fanart, the manips, the gifsets, the ideas, the grand total of fanwork that has literally made Sterek one of the most popular & beloved ships of this time. We don’t need Jeff. 

Let Jeff continue to hate the ship. You know that he’s seething inside regarding the fate of this show, meanwhile, Stereks continue to make Sterek fanwork & everybody else is looking at Jeff Davis & his show w/ genuine laughter on their faces. 

I mean, seriously. Jeff Davis did everything he could to destroy Sterek within the show. He no-homo’d both Stiles & Derek (at the same time, might I say). He kept those characters apart. He didn’t let Dylan & Hoechlin work together. He refused to do any of the scenes that Dylan & Hoechlin proposed to Jeff. And look at where Jeff ended up....his show failed, Dylan & Hoechlin left, nobody is watching, and he has had to resort to using Sterek for views. 

Just like Criminal Minds, just like his Let the Right One In, & just like Teen Wolf. Jeff Davis has gotten himself fucked over. So much that his only path for a career is to hope for a TW podcast series....plus....his hopes that MTV will do a TW reboot in the coming years & give Jeff Davis the opportunity to be the showrunner....it’s not happening. 

In closing, 

Don’t allow yourself to get fooled for even a second to convince yourself that Jeff Davis is a good person. He’s not. He doesn’t care about you. He doesn’t care about fans. And he especially doesn’t care about Sterek. He cares about money, ratings, & getting his revenge on all the people that get to laugh at his failure. That’s why he targeted that Geekiary interviewer. 

He knew that if Farid had been the one sitting there, he wouldn’t have opened his mouth. It’s just like how he doesn’t have a Twitter or Tumblr anymore, because he knows he couldn’t handle getting directly bombarded with critiques from displeased fans. And also, he knows deep down inside that he fucked himself over by fucking Stereks over...which of course, leaves him the only option to pretend as if he’s perfectly fine.   

So play it safe, Stereks. Don’t fall for nonsense. Don’t fall into whatever tricks Jeff will try to play in 6B. Remember that all of the Sterek you saw in the trailer was icing. It was purposely put there to entice you into watching, so you’d end up falling into the lower levels of whatever rotten, shitty mess Jeff is trying to cover up. Because you know he’s going to probably bait Sterek in the beginning of 6B, only to disappoint in the finale...

And remember, don’t let yourself get bullied by anybody for being a Sterek shipper. We’re strong. This fandom has gone through a lot of shit, but we’ve managed to create something so beautiful for ourselves. We’ve won & Jeff Davis will watch from his sinking show. He’ll be vindictive & bitter for the rest of his days, because he knows that fucking over Stereks was the absolute WORST decision that he made with his show. 

Stay strong. Stay safe. Keep shipping. Sterek is Eternal.

-Cole

#sterek #jeff davis #geekiary #sterek is eternal

[slayerscommathe]

Hi

hey! thanks for asking. the instructions in this thing are all made in accordance with photoshop cs5. it’s also photo-heavy. i also don’t use apple, so all the keyboard commands in the tutorial are according to windows 10. you will need to know how to make a gif if you want to use this tutorial. you’ll always need to know how to use some basic tools in photoshop, like the quick selection tool. if you don’t know how to make a gif, here’s a link to a tutorial: click here!

this is the post the ask is referring to. here’s an example of the final product:

also, two things to note before we get started:

1. my theme stretches out all inline images to 100% of the post width and i haven’t been able to figure out how to Stop That from happening yet. so if something appears super blown up under the “keep reading” cut (for instance, the gif in step 3), that’s because of…that. yeah. :| you can circumvent this if you have xkit and you have that extension that allows you to read stuff below a keep reading cut right on your dashboard, so that’s a thing, too.)

2. jsyk, i wrote this in chunks through the past month, and i changed some of my settings in that time span, so some screenshots have a gray background and others have a blue background. that doesn’t mean anything, it’s just that i changed the color of the background in photoshop.

STEP 1. find your “big picture,” the one that’ll be overlaying all of the small gifs. open up your image in photoshop and crop it to around 540px in width (or 500px, depending on what dimensions you’re using), so that the picture doesn’t cover up all the gifs in your final product. you should note that you should make the height of your picture to two times as large as the height of the final gif you plan on making. in this case, the final gif i planned on making was 270px in height, so i made sure the height of my cropped photo was 540px.

then, use the quick selection tool (shown below) to cut out any part of the background you don’t want.

if you want, you could then sharpen/add coloring to that photo any way you like to make it more pretty or something. (i colored all of the big pictures, in this case.) your photo should look like this now (these dimensions are 540x540, fyi):

next, i cropped this picture into two separate 540x270 pictures, because i can’t exactly put a 540x540 picture on top of my final 540x270 gif. here’s what one of them looks like now:

you can blur the edges of the photo if you want, to get rid of the sharp-ish uneven edges (if…you know what i mean lol), but it isn’t really visible in the final product anyway. i didn’t do that in this gif. your call completely.

you’re about done with the big picture (for now), so set it aside.

STEP 2. make a new file (???), its dimensions being the size of the final gif you want. calculate the dimensions of the small gifs you want to make so that they all can fit into your final gif. in this case, following what dimensions i wanted my final gif size to be and the number of gifs i wanted in each final gif, my small gifs are 86x86, leaving a space for around 6px between each of the small gifs. i’d also definitely suggest laying out guidelines for where your small gifs will be:

or, if you wanted to make “bigger” smaller gifs — like if you only wanted four small gifs per final gif — your guidelines may look something like this (assuming small gifs are 268x133):

anyway, whatever dimensions you want to use, just lay out guidelines for them. it will make your life so much easier when you put all your small gifs into the final gif, because they’ll snap right into place. here’s a link to the psd i used for this gifset, by the way, if you want to make a gif exactly according to the dimensions i’ve used here. (it’s unfinished, because i wasn’t continuously saving while i made these gifs — file size got too big and it took too long — but you can figure out the rest after you’ve read this tutorial, i hope :P).

STEP 3. copy your big picture onto the document you laid the gridlines out, so that your doc now looks like this.

you see how some of the squares are completely filled in by the big picture? note which squares those are and forego making any gifs for those locations, because the process gets really tedious later on and you don’t want to be stuck making gifs and highlighting its layers and moving them to a place that no one will even see in the end product. in this case, i’ve highlighted the squares that i will not be using, and you can see that below.

anyway, once you’ve taken note of the places you won’t need a gif, delete the big picture from the file for now, and make sure that your doc is completely empty save for the guidelines grid, so that step 5 won’t get messed up.

STEP 4. make your small gifs, but make sure that they all have the same number of frames! crop each of your gifs to the dimensions you previously calculated in step 2, and color it any way you want. here’s the final product of one of my gifs, after cropping and sharpening and coloring:

STEP 5. okay, so now, you’ve made your small gifs and set the dimensions on your final gif. what you want to do now is open the first small gif you want placed in the final gif in photoshop, like this:

once you double click on it, it should bring up a screen like this:

click on the three horizontal bars thing on the upper right corner of the frame animation, and then click select all frames.

the frames should then all be highlighted. then, click on the same button and select copy frames from the menu.

now go back to the doc file you made in step 2, the one with all the guidelines and stuff. make sure that you’re in frame animation, NOT timeline animation. if you’re in timeline animation, click on the icon that looks like the one below (it should be placed on the bottom right corner of the screen), and it’ll convert to frame animation.

once you’ve done that, click on the three bars button again and this time, click paste frames. when you click it, this following window should pop up:

the default for this “paste frames” window is for the circle next to “paste after selection” to be selected. select the circle next to “paste over selection,” like the example above shows. this is important, so make sure you Do That!!! after that, your final gif file should now look like this:

now, these next few steps are theoretically optional (??? honestly i don’t even know if they are lol, it’s more organization than anything but organization is also really important in making these gifs, in case you couldn’t tell :P), and also super annoying to finish, but if you don’t do them, you’ll have a hell of a time moving all the gifs into place later on. go to the layers panel. right-click on a random layer and then click on select similar layers.

all of the layers should now be highlighted. press ctrl + g to move them all to a group. now, all the layers that belong to that gif, and only that gif, will be all grouped together nicely.

i’d also rename the group to something that identifies the gif for what it is, so in case you need to do something with that particular gif later on in the process, you can easily identify it. in this case, since this gif is buffy from s3e21, i later named the group “321”.

STEP 6. so, now that you’ve put your first gif on, you’ll want to put all the other ones too. open the second gif that you want to use, and copy and paste the frames onto the same document, exactly like you did with the first gif. however, while pasting your second gif’s frames onto the document, when the window prompting you to select your paste method appears, not only do you want to make sure that the circle next to “paste over selection” is, but also check the link layers box at the bottom of the window. (note that checking the link layers only applies when pasting this particular gif.)

after you’ve done all of that, your doc should now look something like this:

yes, the second gif has overlayed the first gif. don’t worry; we can fix that easily. right-click on any one of the layers in the layers panel. then, select select linked layers from the menu that appears:

this should select all the frames in your second gif, and only those frames, because you linked them together while pasting them over the first gif. press ctrl + g again so that you can group these gifs together. after you’ve done that, click on the group you’ve just made so that it’s highlighted.

then, go to the main body of your document, and then click and drag the second gif (which, again, is placed on top of the first gif) to the second placement on your guidelines grid:

STEP 7. so now, you’ve got two gifs. to add all your gifs from this point on, it gets a little bit different than what you’ve been doing for the first two. (it’s also a lot more tedious, but at least for me, i haven’t been able to find a better way to do it. so.) anyway: open, copy, and paste your third gif like you did for the past two gifs (make sure that this time, though, the link layers box in the window prompting you to select what paste method you want isn’t checked!). your doc should now look like this:

note that the third gif is overlaying the first gif, just like how when you initially pasted the second gif, it was overlaying the first gif as well.

now, what you want to do is manually highlight all the layers of the third gif in the layers panel. you can’t use any of the “select similar layers” or “select linked layers” options that you used to select all the layers that belonged to either the first/second gif anymore, because if you do that, you’ll end up highlighting all similar layers (that is, every single layer in the panel) or all linked layers, and you won’t be able to move your gif properly. you can do this by holding down the ctrl button on your keyboard, and then clicking on each layer in the panel until they’re all highlighted.

once again, press ctrl + g to group them together after they’re all highlighted. after that, move the third gif to the third placement on the grid guidelines, exactly like how you did moving the second gif.

STEP 8. repeat step 7 until you’ve fit in all the gifs you want. remember that you don’t have to fill in the doc completely with gifs, because the big picture you made in step 1 will cover some spaces completely.

your gif file should now look something like this (just…imagine that the bottom line is filled with gifs that are actually from episodes 10 - 15 lmao i just copied the 409 gif onto there to fill the rest of the space; i’m using the same psd i linked somewhere in the second step of this post and it isn’t complete):

STEP 9. finally, copy the big picture you made in step 1 onto your doc, complete with all the compiled gifs. your doc should now look something like this:

it’s basically finished by this point. just make sure that the delay time between frames is what you want it to be (i usually gif buffy with a delay of 0.05 seconds). then, save your gif! make sure it’s under the 3.00 mb limit; if it isn’t, convert the frame animation back to timeline animation and get rid of some frames.

voilà, you’re done!

anyway, i hope this wasn’t too hard to follow.

#not buffy #inbox #spnjensenlove02 #sct #sct.tutorials #add. tags #lmao hell i hope i haven't forgotten anything and that this is clear enough?? #anyway good luck <3

[wangsjoon]

hi, i’m gonna show you how i coloured the training scene gifs from this gifset bcs i know it’s a god damn struggle to get that stupid magenta red blue out of Magnus face and i know this may not be the perfect colouring for it yet but!!! i want to share it with you guys!! 

i’ll show you how to go from this

to this!

the tutorial is under the cut :) 

like i always do, i cropped, resized & sharpened my gif! this is gonna be the gif we start out with!

now we’re gonna add a curves layer to make the gif brighter, we all know shadowhunters loves to make everything so dark you can’t see anything.

after adding this curves layer the gif isn’t really a lot brighter or anything but that’s only bcs we gotta go slowly brighter through the process of getting that stupid magenta out of Magnus face :)

now the next step will be adding a selective colour layer, and we will on that one layer, change the magentas and the reds! idk if it looks different if you take two different layers, i tried to figure it out but idk!! however, about the layers. add a new selective colour layer with these settings!

after you put these settings, change the layer style to “color” here and make sure you press the little fx that i drew a circle around. 

now magnus looks a little like a blueberry, but don’t worry, he won’t look like that when we’re done :D

now we’re going to add a levels layer to give the gif more of its depth back!

after adding the level layer our gif will look like this!

now i’m gonna warn you, this tutorial will be way longer than my usual tutorials bcs there are way more steps needed to get the magenta out! 

the next step is yet again adding a selective colour layer. 

i know this layer probably makes it seem like we’re just making the magenta issue even worse but it’s an important step to be able to change the colours later on! this is the result after adding this layer. :)

we can see how important it was to add that one selective colour layer in the next step. it’s, again, adding a selective colour layer!

when we now look at the gif after adding that layer, we can see how slowly our gif is going into the right direction :D 

now we’re gonna add another selective colour layer to get a bit of that magenta out of magnus hair and give the gif more depth again!

the gif is a little darker and magnus hair doesn’t look pink/magenta anymore, yay!

now we’re going to add a colour balance layer to this mess :)

this won’t change a lot, just take some of the orange-ish tone out of the gif!

now we will try to get the orange into a more normal looking tone and we will do this through the next few steps! 

for now we’ll add another selective colour layer!

it does exactly what we want it to do, change the orange into a more normal tone of colour, as we can see in our gif now!

because of all our editing and playing around with selective colour layers & colour balance layers our gif has lost a lot of brightness, so now we’re going to add a curves layer to change that!

the gif should look like this after adding the curves layer! :)

our next step is adding a selective colour layer to slowly get more onto fixing the orange, i know i’ve said this like 10 times before but.. it’s true!! :D 

this again won’t make a lot of difference for now, but is important for the process! :D 

now another selective colour layer :)

this will reduce a little more of the reddish tones in the gif!

now we’re gonna add a hue/saturation layer, idk if this is tricky but i figured out it’s really easy! just press on the little hand next to “reds” and click onto magnus’ face so it shows the degrees on the last guide, then type in the saturation & lightness! 

the result should be looking like this! 

now you probably realised that magnus suit still looks pink/magenta-ish, but no worries, we’re gonna slowly, slowly fix that now too with adding another selective colour layer :)

this turned the more blue-ish parts of the suit into the cyan kinda colour it normally is :D

for the next step another selective colour layer to change the magentas a little bit!

this won’t change a lot tbh, but it’s pretty important because it makes the magenta a little paler btu also a little more pinkish!

we’re almost done now btw, i’m sorry this is so long and such a mess!! i never really strategically colour i just bash layers on the gif until it looks good :D 

another selective colour layer follows!

this is just to bring out the magenta a little more again :D 

next step is one more hue/saturation layer :) just add it like you did before with the first one! :D

i know that now the gif looks really confusingly weird and all that. 

if your gif looks like that please don’t think you did anything wrong, this is perfect! we’re gonna go to the last steps now so don’t worry :D 

next up we just have to change the layer style to “color” again and select the little fx like we did it in the beginning!

Now you just take your eraser tool and erase the layer from Magnus face and the background. be careful that you don’t erase too much bcs then Magnus’ jacket will suddenly become purple/magenta again!

your result should look something like the gif above :D

now we just have to add a few more layers to make the gifs a little brighter and fix the colours a little more!

first we’re gonna add another selective colour layer :)

this one will make your gif look like this!

now another selective colour layer just to give the gif a little more depth again :D

this will make it look like this!

and now we’re finally getting to our last step, adding a little more brightness with a curves layer :D

and we’re finished! your result should look like this! :D 

wow that was long haha :D thank you for reading this whole tutorial although it’s so long, i hope it’s not confusing and if you have any questions you can always message me or send me an ask! also you can leave me suggestions what i could make a tutorial for if you’d like to, i might take a little time to make one but i will! thank you once more <33  

#userjo #usermeliorn #highwarlockkareena #lukemagnus #amorverus #shadowhunters #magnus bane #* #tutorials* #im sorry if this is a mess this one was so long dfkjhlfdj #any questions? u can always come ask me or message me

[sweetnestor]

Story of Another Us | Week 11

university au, platonic af, now on ao3!

previous chapter | masterlist | playlist

My heart is here, it’s such a cause

I didn’t expect a phone call, text message, or any interaction from Mark. I probably should have been the one to go to him. Apologize for being stupid and getting too close to his friend. However, given from the silence between us since that night, I figured that he wanted me to stay away. I wasn’t even sure if I could still call him my boyfriend, and that terrified me. I desperately wanted to talk to him, but he was angry with me and I couldn’t really blame him.

This silence only forced me and Jack to carry on as usual. We went to class together that morning, earlier than usual since we decided it was best not to go back to Mark’s while he was in this mood. This left me with no time to dress presentably or do any makeup, and Jack had to call his girlfriend and rely on her to get his videos uploaded. Not to mention, the car ride from my apartment all the way to YTU was much longer than if we had gone from Mark’s house.

Speaking of YTU, campus was even more empty these days. There were only about six weeks left in the semester. Six weeks until the place closed down for good. There was really no point in coming anymore, according to the students who lived in the area. I, on the other hand, needed to get my money’s worth from these fucking classes, and so did Jack.

“You feel like meeting people?” he asked, pointing out the small group of people standing around the entrance to the main parking lot.

The one day I didn’t put on makeup. I drove past the group and parked somewhat far from the main office. I thought about it as we got out of the car, but I didn’t have much choice. The group had followed my car to where we parked.

Technically, we weren’t supposed to meet fans here, but Jack was more than happy to break the rules since “there’s no one here to tell us we can’t!” Plus, campus was closing down anyway, so fuck it.

“You’re Bella Santiago, right?” one girl asked me, which was surprising. I thought they were here for Jack. “Can I get a selfie? I really love your videos!”

It happened very quickly. I smiled for the picture, the girl thanked me and went to get a picture with Jack. Another person came up to me, smiling wide.

“Your anxiety video made me cry! It was so touching!” she told me.

“Aw, thank you!” I replied, instantly a lot happier. “That means a lot!”

A sudden wave of praise came from the group, all of them saying that the video was really good. It made me feel warm and pleasant. So maybe I wasn’t so depressing after all. I was expecting to be brushed off, especially since most of the group seemed to know Jack. But they were all really kind.

However, it didn’t last long. A campus security guard whisked us away, and practically yelled at the group to get off property. Jack and I pretty much had no choice but to follow him inside the main office.

“You guys are not allowed to interact with fans, you know that, right?” he told us sternly. “You’re only going to attract more people here.”

“Well, it’s not like we asked them to come over here,” I said back. “The place is closing anyway, why does it matter?”

Jack gave me an incredulous look as we walked through the main office. It wasn’t exactly typical of me to talk back, and he had never seen me be this way before.

“I’m just doing my job, Miss,” the guard told me before walking off.

I rolled my eyes and went out to the courtyard. That’s when Jack finally spoke.

“I’ve never heard you talk like that before,” he said. “You sounded really… ballsy.”

I chuckled. “I guess when it comes to the people who watch my videos, I take no shit.”

“That’s good. Really bold of you.”

It wasn’t until we got to class that we both tweeted out apologies to the people we met in the parking lot. I had to refrain from ranting publicly. Instead, I focused on what it was like to meet those people. In my time of have a sizeable following, I was noticed seldomly. It wasn’t until I was associated with Mark did it start happening more. You would think being approached by random people would make my anxiety spike…

Instead, it just made me tired and irritable. By the time we got home from class, I was looking forward to a ten year nap. Jack was still peppy and perky and talking off my last nerves. However, being the avoidant little shit I was, I just let him be. Listening to him also meant I could avoid checking my phone for any interaction from Mark. I really didn’t want to be the one to start that conversation.

“So, are we going to record today?” That was the only thing I caught from his long ramble.

I thought about it. “Are you up for it?”

“Yeah!”

We were supposed to make a video for my channel today. I had to do that today. Despite everything, this had to be done. I couldn’t be a stick in the mud.

“Okay,” I said, my eyes trailing up to Jack’s hair. “How overdue are you for dying your hair?”

He ran his fingers through the faded green locks in thought. I could see his brown roots peeking out and I almost audibly gasped. I had to get my hands on them.

“You wanna do that for a video?” he asked.

“Is it a bad idea? We could do something else…”

“No, no it’s your channel, you hold all the cards here.”

~

“Hey guys, it’s Bella!” I greeted happily to the camera set up in the living room. “Today I’m here with my friend Jack, and I’m gonna dye his hair and bleach his roots.”

Jack was sitting in a chair in front of me, a towel over himself. His hair was slightly all over the place, given that I was touching it and messing with it earlier to see what exactly I needed to do for this look. He was pretty pleased about this, given that I wasn’t going to charge him for doing this for him. He needed a new coat of green hair, and I needed a new video to post. It’s a win-win.

“So, this is partly a tutorial and partly two friends hanging out,” I explained.

“Twice the fun,” Jack said in a mock happy tone.

“Let’s get started!”

I mixed the bleach in a plastic bowl with a brush and explained how to do so before applying it to Jack’s roots. I also read off the box just to make sure I wasn’t doing anything wrong. “‘Do not use if you are not a licensed cosmetologist.’ Oops!”

“You’re not licensed?” Jack asked in mock surprised. “You’re a fraud!”

“Whoops, you caught me!”

“No, but really, didn’t you go to beauty school?”

“I did, but I never finished it because of YTU. So technically, I shouldn’t be allowed near these products.”

I continued applying the bleach, surprisingly at ease. Hair knowledge was right underneath my makeup knowledge, and it was fun getting my hands on some hair again. Although, since it was only the top of Jack’s head that needed the fix, the first step was done a lot quicker than expected.

“Somehow I forgot that you don’t have that much hair to bleach and dye,” I pointed out. “How much time do you usually spend in a salon?”

“Oh god, like two hours,” he replied, rolling his eyes. “It takes forever!”

“Dude, my hair takes at least four or five hours,” I told him, pointing to my long, black and pink ombre. “You’re lucky!”

“How can you be so patient? I go crazy just sitting in the chair!”

“It’s fun for me.” I smiled.

The next step after washing off the bleach was the color. I chose a vibrant green that wasn’t too off from previous shades that Jack has had before. For me, this was the easiest part.

“With bleach, you have to be careful not to leave it on for too long,” I explained, “especially with darker hair because it’s very easy to damage it a lot. So you have to constantly keep an eye on it and see how quickly the hair catches onto it. With the actual color, you just have to apply it and wait it out. Usually the formula will have some type of vitamins and stuff that’s good for the hair. But it’s still a good idea to get some hydrating conditioners and other hair products on the side.”

“See, I wish my hairdresser in Ireland had told me this,” Jack said. “Everything makes a lot more sense now!”

Once we finished and cleaned everything up, Jack had wonderful, bright green hair. I was relieved I hadn’t lost my hair styling skills over time. As soon as the camera turned off, I pretty much hid away in my bedroom, the depression returning. I crawled into bed and sighed in relief. I couldn’t shake the feeling of dread and gloominess for some reason. It was like I drained the last of my energy in that video.

I scrolled on my phone, looking at the pictures that were posted from the impromptu meetup earlier. I looked awful without my makeup. How could people see me as a beauty guru? How could I go outside looking like that?

So much for finding comfort on Twitter… I went to Tumblr instead, and I had to resist making a long, rambly post. Then I realized that no one would want to see a wall of text clog up their dash. I just looked at my feed, reblogging pictures of makeup I already owned, liking posts people mentioned me in. There were cute edits and gifsets of me and Mark, which only made my heart ache.

I wasn’t sure why I got so angry with him. Maybe I did get too close to Jack. Maybe I had done things that gave off the wrong idea. Or maybe I just wasn’t attracted to Mark and that’s why I didn’t want to get into bed with him. Maybe I was just faking my anxiety this whole time.

~

It felt like time was going slow, or not moving at all. I wasn’t sure if I had fallen asleep or gotten up at all. I could only tell time by the sound of Jack’s voice outside my door. He was recording his own videos and acting like everything was okay. I wish I knew how to act like that off camera.

I started feeling restless and antsy when his voice finally stopped. A constant background noise was something I needed, otherwise I’d go crazy. I rolled onto my side, listening for any kind of sound to break the silence. No footsteps, movements, or anything from the TV did that. It was like Jack had disappeared. Wouldn’t blame him.

Honestly, though, I still didn’t want to interact with anyone. I just liked hearing someone else in the apartment. I went to take a shower. Any sound from there would block out the ongoing gloom in my head.

I pretty much just sat there. Actual hygiene wasn’t important to me at the moment. The water was hitting my scalp and, while it was deteriorating the black and pink dye in my hair, it felt good. It gave me a sense of feeling again. Like a breath of fresh air, except it was water. I coughed and choked. It was better than not feeling anything.

When I was out of the shower and getting dressed, I heard noise within the apartment. I heard voices. Angry voices. Maybe I really did go crazy. Although, the mere thought did make me leave my room to actually make sure that wasn’t true.

I found Jack and Mark standing in the living room. They went quiet as soon as I showed up. The air was tense, making my stomach flip over. To be honest, I didn’t expect Mark to show up so soon.

“You still let him stay here?” he asked me in disbelief.

Yes I did, and I’m so sorry. Please don’t leave me. I’m so sorry for being a terrible girlfriend, I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry…

Those words were rising up my throat, ready to be puked out. I was fighting with myself not to speak those words. I couldn’t apologize for letting my friend live here.

“It was me,” Jack spoke up. “I asked if I could still stay here. I’m so sorry, I didn’t realize how bad the situation was.”

“You’re telling me,” Mark began, not sounding any less angry, “that even after I told you how uncomfortable I was with you living with my girlfriend, you still had the nerve to ask her if you could still keep living here?”

Jack gulped, clearly intimidated. “Yes.”

“What kind of friend are you?”

“Oh my god!” I snapped, my body trembling with nerves. I couldn’t control my mouth. “You’re the one who made him stay here in the first place! You’re the one who pushed us to be friends! You’re the one who felt enough pity for me to fly your friend out here and talk to me because I can’t do that on my own! ¿Y sabes que? You don’t get to be angry that Jack and I are friends now! You don’t get to be angry because he’s here for me more than you are, that’s on you! So don’t come crying over here quejando y quejando because you’re the one who made all this happen in the first place!”

I was breathing heavily and my chest was hurting. Mark and Jack had their mouths open in shock. When have they ever heard me speak this way? I didn’t think I could speak this way either.

Thankfully, the silence didn’t last long. Mark sighed and nodded to my open bedroom door. “Room.”

Still fuming, I turned on my heel and went to my room, Mark quickly following my trail. Before I shut the door, I saw Jack quickly scurry over to his room to hide. Lucky him, he gets to sit this one out.

“What do you mean he’s here for you more?” Mark asked, breathing like he was trying to keep himself steady. “What do you mean by that?”

“Exactly that, you’re never here,” I told him. “And you asked Jack to move here, without so much as giving me a heads up!”

“I didn’t ask him, I told him that you had an extra room, and you were happy to let him stay!” Mark justified.

“Because you put me on the spot! That doesn’t matter now anyway, I’m actually glad he’s my roommate, because as I said, he’s my friend and he’s there for me!”

“Stop saying that!” Mark nearly yelled, making me flinch. However, he took a step back and lowered his tone. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry if you feel like I’ve been neglecting you. I have been busy, I’ve been going to meetings and making videos, and this tour thing. I do all of this while you’re on campus, and I try to get things done, I do. Aside from that, I’ve got Matt and Ryan, and it’s like I’m raising kids! I’m not trying to use that as an excuse either, but I am sorry I can’t always be here. It’s not fair to you.”

Time management was something we had established when we first started dating. For some reason, I didn’t think it was going to be this hard. Maybe I shouldn’t have said anything at all. This was all part of the vlogger dating experience, after all.

“So you’re not avoiding me?” I asked.

“Of course not.”

“I wouldn’t blame you if you were, I know I’m a handful.”

“Don’t say that, Bella. I know things are hard right now, but I will make a better effort to be with you.”

I paced around the room to avoid looking at him. “Okay… so, what about Jack?”

Mark shrugged. “What about him?”

“Am I not allowed to be friends with him anymore? He’s the only friend I’ve got.” I hated saying that, it just emphasized my patheticness.

It felt worse when Mark hesitated. “I don’t know. Do you really not have anyone else?”

“No…” I said softly. “No, and it sucks. I only have you and him, two whole people. And I know I should try to talk to more people, but god you have no idea how hard it is!”

“I know. You deserve to have friends, even if it’s only one or two. I’m sorry I made a big deal out of you and Jack. I just want you to trust me,” Mark confessed. “I can’t even begin to imagine how hard it must be for you, and I’m sorry if I made it harder. Just know that I am here for you, whenever you need me. I promise.”

That’s a big word that adds more pressure. But who was I to deny him? Words could only do so much, but god I couldn’t go down to have only one friend. Especially if that friend wasn’t going to stay here permanently.

“Okay,” I said. “Fine…”

“Okay.” Mark sighed.

Don’t lose this one. He’s all you’ve got. You lose him, you lose everything...

_______

next chapter

#jacksepticeye x oc #jacksepticeye x reader #markiplier x oc #markiplier x reader #soau #sweetheart writes #theres like 3 more chapters left ksdhklasdhklasd #also the last 3 songs on the playlist are more 'bonus songs' #like the rest are mentioned or included in the story somehow #but the last three are like just for lols

[juhyun]

♡ CONTENT CREATOR YEAR IN REVIEW ♡

i wasn’t tagged but the lovely @psyoungs​💖✨ mentioned me, thank you!! even though i’m not very active here anymore🥺

→ first creation of 2020: i started off my 2020 with a simple edit!!

→ most recent creation of 2020: this one 

→ one of your favorite creations from 2020: this dreamcatcher gfx i really like, i remember it being a lot of fun playing with the colors and i just really enjoy making graphics like this

→ a creation you’re really proud of: this one, i also really enjoyed making it and this set  because i really love the simplicity of the first and last pieces and the mess in the middle, it’s just very nice ╰(*´︶`*)╯

→ a new style you tried this year and a gifset: i don’t think i ever incorporated a fade-in before in any of my gifsets like this??

→ a creation that took you forever: this gifset i’m sure and this gfx

→ your creation from 2020 that received the most notes: this one!! 

→ a creation you think deserved more notes: this gfx, i really enjoyed working on it even though it took me a while,  i really wish it had gotten at least as many notes as it’s counterpart did

→ a new fandom you joined and a creation you made for it: mmm i made a pretty cute dreamnote gifset but i didn’t really join the fandom orz

→ a creation you made that breaks your heart: this gifset ... every time i look at it i’m reminded how many time ps crashed while it was being worked on 😭  but i love this set anyways lol

→ a ‘simple’ creation that you really love: this one, this one!!!!! i love it!!!!!!💖💕💗💖i want to try making more of these simple sets, they’re really refreshing compared to my more full pieces

→ a creation that was inspired by another one: this set although it’s not in the caption, because i couldn’t find the insp post orz;; but there’s this icc picspam with the lyrics on it the way it is on my gifset and i really really love that edit and wanted to try it out

→ a favorite creation created by someone else: all of the works tagged fave or insp on my blog!! that’s a lot lol but the ones that stuck with me the most are these✨ 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

→ some of your favorite content creators from the year: ummmmmmmm i’m too embarrassed to tag anybody TT

#tagged #it's still january so this isn't too over due!!!!! #wanted to include joohys but that made things hard lol