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aonungsmate · 1 year

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Hellllooo

So I was reading ao’nung x reader fanfics and like I came up with an idea that was stuck to my head ever since. So like there’s a sound on TikTok where it’s like : “you’re not good enough for my daughter and I don’t want you to be around her, end of story” …..”so why don’t you give me one last chanc-“ but on ao’nung x sully!reader where she’s like younger than neteyam and Lo’ak, she’s the kind of girl who can be strict but gentle at the same time, help her grandma and mom to make food, heals, the type of girl that dads would be like “girls like you shouldn’t be bla bla bla” the type to walk grandmas on the cross way, type to open a bakery by herself and call it the Sully’s Family Bakery 💀 . So ao’nung wanted to court the reader but Jake, Neteyam and Lo’ak aim buying it so ao’nung had to come with some Metkayina specialty and gifts and maybe even fruitier a song 💀 but Jake is just a protective dad and it turned down to reader scolding 4 dudes who’s like almost twice her size about how she’s mature enough to know who would treat her right and stuff and kiri, Tuk and neytiri is just enjoying the scene 💀

I Hold The World, But You

Ao'nung x Sully!Reader[Word count: 2.8k]

Ask and you shall receive- This is me ditching my written reports to feed all of you <33 Thank you so much for requesting anon!

Warnings: Nothing notable! Please do inform me if there is!

Ao’nung has never really known what it means to be alive. He never faced any oppression nor any hardship of notable difficulty due to his social status. Being the son of the olo’eyktan entails so much prestige, but he’s never really known how to live. Not until he met you.

The moment you were born, you have always known the dangers of living. Having been born into a family with warrior parents, who were both victims of war, evident pain is still visible in their eyes. You were Jake Sully and Neytiri te Tskaha Mo'at'ite’s third child, their first-born daughter after they decided to call Grace’s daughter, Kiri, their very own. Growing up as the daughter of the Toruk Makto and olo’eyktan of the Omatikaya meant bearing the horrors of reality that the na’vi have been facing for years. Your father was deemed responsible for leading the forest people into many victories against the sky people, along with your mother and the former olo’eyktan, Tsu'tey te Rongloa Ateyitan, one of the finest warriors that the omatikaya clan who was known for leading the na’vi against the RDA forces in the assault on The Tree of Souls.

“I tried to kill your father the first time we met.”

Having been born into Jake Sully’s family meant so much more than being a warrior’s child. Your childhood was filled with love. Your older brothers, Neteyam and Lo’ak, complete polar opposites but are both very protective of their younger siblings. Neteyam, the finest candidate for the next olo’eyktan, the one who obeys to live up to expectations and earn the title of being a mighty warrior, and Lo’ak, the older brother who gets into so much trouble to try and live up to expectations, most protective of you, but incomparable to your father, who acts as both armor and bow against the dangers of the world.

You grew up being taken care of by your older sister Kiri, befriending nature through her imaginative mind and immense affinity for connecting herself with the things that surround her. Your family always knew that there was something special going on between Kiri and the world itself. As if she’s connected to the things you see everyday, she would always see things from a perspective that you would assume Eywa would have.

The scientists were not the only people left in Pandora. You have also been introduced to Spider, a human child that was too young to be put through the cryo chambers. He has greeted each of you as friends, and you do the same with him. Despite your mother’s distaste in his presence, she couldn’t really do anything, for you and your siblings loved him as you would a friend. You thought he was a strong person. Someone you look up to, because he always seems to overcome his limitations as a human.

It wasn’t long before Tuktirey was born. The most adorable sister you could ever have, although a bit of a telltale, much to your brother’s chagrin, she was loved by the whole family. She looks like a bit of your father, and a bit of your mother. Tuk practically looks like a mix of your parents. You love it when she would play with your braids. But most of all, you love it when she would turn to you for more stories and dreams that you would have, carrying the innocent curiosity that a child like her would have.

You loved your siblings. You really do.

But right now? Things are just being so ridiculous.

“No, you cannot court my sister, Ao’nung,” Neteyam shook his head firmly, placing a protective arm in front of you, attempting to shield you from your suitor. There your brother was again. He’s having one of those stingy fits where he would deprive you and your lover of spending time together. Apparently, there was this thing called ‘codes’, where you cannot see your friend’s sister in a romantic way. The idea of it was ridiculous for you.

Really.

“Brother, you cannot have a say in this. You are not the one who is being courted,” you pushed his hand away, flashing a bashful smile at Ao’nung, being enraptured by his viridian eyes. Your eyes were swirling with love and a mix of nervousness as they met those of Ao’nung’s, only to be interrupted by Neteyam. “You are not to be courted by him (y/n), that is final.”

Just what bad deed have you done to deserve this? You obeyed your elders, went to hunt when told to, helped your fellow na’vi when being asked for help, learned healing, and healed others. Eywa! You even learned to cook many dishes after hearing your grandmother complain about how the food being prepared is becoming bland, if it were not for her cooking teylu. You would always say yes to anything that your family asks of you.

You always thought that you would not be able to say no to your family. Maybe there are things that do surprise you. Just like how your brother Lo’ak, is hissing at Ao’nung at this very moment.

“What is going on?” you ran towards the direction of the two young men, carrying firewood that your mother had asked you to fetch for her. There, you found your older brother hissing at your friend, for an unknown reason that somehow, you didn’t want to know. Therefore, being the most resourceful person in the scene, you opted for the firewood, pushing them in your brother's arms and pulling him away from the metkayina boy. “I am sorry Ao’nung, we will see you tomorrow!” With a sweet smile on your lips, how could Ao’nung complain? A boy who’s as smitten as him could never go against your wishes to stop the fight before it escalates. Ao’nung’s head always tends to tell him to go big or go home, but right now, that saccharine smile was his priority. He wouldn’t take the risk and make you cry, no.

He would rather battle a hundred akula than do that. He vowed to protect you after all.

Even from himself.

But that one just seemed impossible. He feels Eywa whispering to him that you are his muntxate.

He sees you as someone he would spend the rest of his life with.

Arriving at your marui, you sighed at your father’s questioning gaze after just seeing you drag your older brother back, as if he was asking just what trouble he got up to.

“What is it this time, Lo’ak?” He crossed his arms, tapping his left foot in impatience. You squinted at your father, knowing how he’d react if he knew he was in a disagreement with Ao’nung.

“Dad, I found him hissing at Ao’nung again–!” “You telltale– I knew that bastard had a bad influence on you!” Lo’ak hissed, his tail swaying back and forth with betrayal written on his eyes. You scoffed, side-eyeing him for a second before facing your father with pleading eyes.

“Bravo Zulu–” “Dad!” you yelled in disbelief, your jaw dropping when your father shook Lo’ak’s hand with pride evident on his face, menacing grins both on their faces. You could feel a migraine turning into aneurysm when your eldest brother entered the marui, “Dad, you wouldn’t believe Ao’nung– Oh, you’re here baby sis!” He chuckled nervously once he noticed your small figure in front of his father. You responded with a glare, crossing your arms at the three men towering over you who take pleasure in making Ao’nung suffer.

Clearing his throat, Neteyam puts a hand on your shoulder, coaxing you out of the pod, telling you that he has something to share with your father and Lo’ak. Refusing to be excluded in a conversation you knew was going to be about how they were going to torment the metkayina you love, you stood your ground and bore your fangs, something that you did very seldom towards your family.

“No.”

Neteyam squinted at you in return, turning to your father for help, instantly getting his support in a matter of a few seconds. “Yeah babygirl, we really need to talk about that trouble tailing your shadow every minute of the day, ‘kay?” Your father said, giving you a smile of reassurance and pressed a kiss on your forehead that did not faze you, even for a bit. Fate seems to be on your father’s side as you heard your mother calling for you in the background. You groaned in annoyance, rubbing a palm on your face causing Lo’ak to snicker at you, “Oh yeah sis, best get moving before mom gives you a whooping huh?”

You’d definitely get back at him when the time comes for him and Tsireya.

Bearing no choice in the matter, you were forced to evacuate your home and walked towards the direction of your mother.

Your brothers and your father on the other hand, were having the time of their lives imparting their knowledge about your suitor and what they would be doing whenever they would see the boy approach you. They have devised ‘the most sneaky’ plans to make Ao’nung back out in his courting, but were not able to deduce that the said young man was actually on his way to their pod as they were conversing with each other, bringing them to this very moment.

“I would like to court your daughter, sir. She is as beautiful as the ocean, and her whole being might as well be my sustenance as I cannot imagine life without her.”

The na’vi are known to be spiritually connected to Eywa, singing and dancing is embedded in their hearts. So no one could really blame Ao’nung when he broke into a song.

“I want to court your daughter,” he started, undulating notes while clenching his fist.

His eyes meet Lo’ak’s and then Neteyam’s, going back to Jake’s, “I know you don’t think I ought to.” He smiled, reminiscing his earliest memories with you, a smile tugging at his lips, “I’m not bad, I’m a great guy you’ll see,”

“I think that you should be–”

They were all sitting on the marui, silence overtaking when Jake suddenly slammed a hand on the floor, hiding his face from view, until Lo’ak burst into fits of laughter, wheezing at Ao’nung his father and Neteyam following suit. Ao’nung chose to ignore Lo’ak’s outburst, pursing his lips in deep contemplation. He would definitely get him back for this when he asks his parents to court Tsireya. Ao’nung licked his lips out of nervousness, seeking validation from your father’s eyes.

“I’ll be honest Ao’nung. I don’t care if you're the goddamn chief’s son,” Jake straightened his posture, emphasizing that he was much mightier than Ao’nung was at the moment, he was Toruk Makto for god’s sake. “You’re not good enough for my daughter, and I don’t want you around her, end of story.”

Ao’nung winced at Jake’s statement, his insecurities taking over his mind. He was the mightiest hunter in the clan that’s for sure, but who’s to say that you were looking for a hunter? A na’vi as charming and lovely as you is sought by most men. He would know because you were much like his sister, whom he finds himself being protective of, most of the time.

“With all due respect JakeSully, I understand why you are being protective of her. I have a sister myself, and might I remind you, your son desires to court her too– So why don’t you give me one last–”

“Get outta here.”

He sang his heart out, yet he still got denied?

Does Eywa hate him? Ao’nung immediately mutters an apology after thinking that way, his mind going in circles as he thought about his options. Then he remembered, go big or go home. Of course the answer to his problems has always been inside of him.

And so, Ao’nung prepared all sorts of things that he could give to show you and your family that he’s a good provider. He foraged in the morning, hunted in the afternoon, twisted the most intricate design he could do on a necklace. This very process went on and on for days. He figured that he would rather put his feelings into action than waste his time bumping shoulders with your brothers to convince them to let him see you. He knew that they would be as stubborn if he didn’t show them what he could do.

His preparation did not go over five days, eager to please you in a matter of short time. He wants to prove himself and he will. After putting his gifts into baskets, he asked Tsireya to come with him in an attempt to distract Lo’ak and avoid disruptions from him. His sister was aware of the Sully brothers’ antics and pitied her own brother, giving him a nod of agreement and took one of the baskets to carry towards the direction of your home. He carried in his left arm the biggest catch he could find that day to offer to your family, along with numerous baskets balancing on his right arm.

It didn’t take long until he reached the opening of your marui, catching the whole family on the floor, preparing dinner. He carefully placed the baskets on the side of the marui and kneeled before the entrance, making you raise your eyebrow at the sudden gesture. Your heart soared when you heard him speak, “Yawntu, I ask for permission to extend this gesture as the beginning of our courtship,” his voice growing smaller as he went on, “So, I offer you this necklace as a promise of love and declaration of commitment to you and only you..”

He pulled out a smaller basket from the satchel he was carrying, presenting you with the most exquisite necklace you have ever seen, precious stones attached to both ends of the fang in the center. You could feel your face heating up, getting nudged by your mother, with Kiri snorting at the corner as soon as she laid her eyes on your flushed face, and Tuk, she was giggling on your mother’s lap, casting a knowing grin at you.

“I accept–”

“No. no. no.” Jake immediately interjected the proposal, standing up from his position, towering over Ao’nung in a matter of seconds, effectively making Ao’nung feel intimidated, his tail swishing in newfound threat, whilst your father’s was flicking from left to right, the end of his tail dragging on the floor to display his protectiveness over you. Proving to be your father’s sons, Neteyam and Lo’ak copied him, standing behind their father, hissing at your suitor.

You have prayed to Eywa that she would somehow bless you with everlasting patience, but perhaps she simply does not want to show mercy to your father and older brothers.

As if Kiri, Tuk and Neytiri were anticipating what was going to happen, they all huddled up together in one corner, deciding to watch things unfold.

“Yes, I accept.” You said with gritted teeth, walking towards the entrance, your tail in full display as it seemingly found vigor from all the pent up anger that you have been feeling ever since your brothers found out about Ao’nung’s plans to court you. Your mother’s smile widened in pride as she saw you display protectiveness over the mate you wanted to choose. You glared at your father, walking in front of Ao’nung to shield him from their gaze.

“This is my life, and I will find a mate for myself,” you said, “I have been nothing but compliant my whole life, and I will not break that streak by not following my heart!”

The three tall men feet taller than you gulped, their ears flattened at your dilated pupils and snarl, currently afraid for themselves. You momentarily turned at Ao’nung, smiling at him sweetly and showed him your neck, gesturing for him to put on the necklace that he had assembled for you, earning angry hisses from your father, making you huff, unfazed by his threats.

“I will rip your throat into shreds if you so much hurt a single hair on–” “Ma’Jake.”

“Oh no, dad we are not done yet,” you crossed your arms, making Jake look away in defeat. Neteyam chuckled at his father’s surrender, making you raise an eyebrow at your brothers, “The two of you have a lot to explain as well.” “We do?” Neteyam frowned, making him elbow Lo’ak. “Damn sis, I have a good reason for–” “No you don’t! You are in the middle of asking Tsireya to be her mate too!”

As if on cue, they all sat before you simultaneously, their tails tucked between their legs. They could only wince at your words, a flurry of apologies thrown at Ao’nung, making you raise your nose up at your brothers and father, threatening them that if they so much treat your suitor badly again, you would find a way to live in a separate marui with Ao’nung.

And they knew to take your words seriously.

—

Muntxate - wife

Bravo zulu - military slang for well done

Teylu - beetle larva; delicacy in Omatikaya

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whywhatswrongwithblue · 8 months

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DW REWATCH

S1E2 THE END OF THE WORLD

The Doctor takes Rose on her first voyage through time, to the year five billion. The sun is about to expand and swallow the earth. Amongst the alien races gathering to watch, a murderer is at work. Who is controlling the mysterious and deadly spiders?

WHAT was he doing in this scene.

You think you're so impressive. ---I am so impressive baby’s first flirt….

2. You lot, you spend all your time thinking about dying, like you're going to get killed by eggs or beef or global warming or asteroids. But you never take time to imagine the impossible, that maybe you survive. i adore this line. Iirc i read somewhere that this episode was made when a lot of negative climate focussed media was coming out and rtd wanted to assure young viewers that there was always hope? Not sure where i saw it but it’s stuck with me

3. Is that why we're here? I mean, is that what you do? Jump in at the last minute and save the Earth?-- rose we are literally here so i can trauma dump. Haven’t you heard of healthy coping mechanisms??

4. He's blue RTD my beloved. What an incredibly realistic, human observation—i feel like companions simply do not do this anymore. And they should!

5. Love the bark makeup. It’s so pretty!

6. The air from my lungs….this episode is so good damn it

7. Moxx of Balhoon better known as the CEO of sex. I give you the gift of bodily salivas lucky Rose

8. CASSANDRAAAAA

9. Rose being overwhelmed and running out. I can’t get over the amount of care and detail RTD put into writing her. She really is his baby. Can’t wait to see how he brings her back now (because he will. He will.)

10. Jabe’s device is unable to identify a timelord, probably because the rest of the universe thinks them dead? Although her reaction is very different from that of the Nestene Consciousness (who is implied to have lost quite a bit in the Time War), whereas Jabe doesn’t seem to have any personal connection. I wonder what the other outsider perceptions of the War were!

11. Ahhh Rose being kind to the plumber. I love my girl. LMAO at her realising she just hitched a ride with a complete stranger w/o thinking about it. The metal spiders are very Minority Report.

12. Your machine gets inside my head. It gets inside and it changes my mind, and you didn't even ask? the WRITING. Just chef’s kiss. Even in this sort of power dynamic, you never ever feel like Rose doesn’t have agency. She’s so smart and capable and fierce. i love her.

13. Gotta love how fast they switch from arguing to flirting. Jiggery-pokery <3

14. I might be late home. and then she comes back a YEAR later JESUS

15. Bad Wolf mention!

16. Hahahah i can’t watch the Jabe scene without thinking of plant sex now, courtesy of Katie

17. I was born on that planet, and so was my mum, and so was my dad. I love how much Rose loves her dad. Like if you’ve never even known a parent, you probably wouldn’t bring them up in a context like this, but the addition implies that Rose thinks of her dad quite a bit, and this is a nice little subtle setup to my favourite episode of the season, Father’s Day

18. The sun filter scene! It’s unexpectedly tense. I remember being really worried the first time I saw it

19. This whole event was sponsored by the Face of Boe. He invited us. Jack set them up….god that’s so sweet. The fact that he knows that they’re properly together in Pete’s World at this point <3333333 he is Literally Us. Putting his blorbos in Situations.

20. What are you going to do, moisturise me?

21. At least it'll be quick. Just like my fifth husband. HUHHH?? LMAO

22. I love the turning fan trope, every time it’s in any movie ever, it’s got me on the edge of my seat

23. Everything has its time, and everything dies. OOF. Appreciate Rose still wanting Cassandra to be saved! Something something parallel with how she changed the Doctor so much that he’s willing to give Cassandra a peaceful death in New Earth <3 the power of love, folks.

24. The Earth death scene is beautiful. I remember feeling so sad that everyone just missed it! And the Doctor finally realising that maybe this wasn’t a great first trip for his young companion xD

25. I'm left travelling on my own 'cos there's no one else.---There's me. What a beautiful moment of intimacy. And such great acting! The Doctor is finally beginning to let her in, and Rose has attached to this stranger so quickly, despite how prickly and condescending he can be. Soulmates <3

Loveee this ending. 10/10 again!

#dw rewatch: s1 #rose tyler #ninth doctor #ninerose #rtd era #meta

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demon-blood-youths · 2 days

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An Officer's Corruption - Part Twenty-Nine

Hi everyone, this is Deamon-mun with part 29 for An Officer's corruption. This is for my friend @the-silver-peahen-residence who started this series. Here are the chapters so far.

Chapters so far

||Previous Chapters 1-7||((Click here))

((Previous chapters 8-13)) (Click here))

||Previous chapters 14-20)) ((Click here))

Part Twenty one ((NSFW Warning))

Part Twenty two ((NSFW Warning))

Part Twenty three

Part Twenty Four

Part Twenty-Five

Part Twenty-Six

Part Twenty Seven ( Dark Theme Warning )

Part Twenty-Eight

((Your reading part Twenty Nine))

||OVA Chapters 1-7|| ((Written by me and Peahen ) (Click here))

------ Warnings ----

Heavy NSFW Content

Dom/Sub

Teasing

Sexual Themes

Violence

----- Drabble Summary -----

After they meet with UA, Sai explains what is discussed to Oblivion about Yuuka's past and the crime against her. After that, Sai decides his next course of action while staying in Japan. But first, he is going to spend quality time with Terry. Also...what are the whereabouts of Rust and Davion? And what's going on at Northern State Penitentiary?

-----

----

"So that's what they told me." Sai told Oblivion at her room. She narrows her eyes. "Damn it."

"Yeah...I know."

"So to find the ones responsible, I have to follow a trail like the principal said?"

"Yes. These drugs are similar in the ones in the drug busting cases based on the toxicity report. They told us that the direction that Yuuja was running from is Yokohoma.

"That's right. Lucky for us, a group responsible for smuggling these drugs was busted and is now held in Northern State Penitentiary."

Oblivion makes a face. "And the group is..."

"Port Mafia. They have three of their members." Said Sai. "You might need to find a way to talk to one of them at least.".

"Actually...I do." Oblivion sighs.

"?" Sai blinked. Oblivion answers, "I know the warden actually, so I will be fine in getting an interview or a meeting with one of the Port Mafia." She said. "Anyway..thanks for this, Shdwkyz. I apprricate it."

"Of course." Sai says. "Oh. One more thing...the principal and Yuuka's homeroom teacher wants to talk to you if you have the time. They want to hear it from you." He said. Oblivion blinks before nodding. "Yeah sure. Tell them I am available."

"Good. I gave them your contact information. So please pick it up when you're ready."

"Got it. Thanks. I talk to you soon." She said.

"Right. Later."

Then Sai hung up. Oblivion sighs as she leans against the wall on her bed. "Guess I need to visit Uncle Dazai." She said before sighing, "I hope he isn't trying to find a way to kill himself again." She mutters, imagining Dazai being so happy to see her only to ask her if she can electrocute him with love. To death. Oblivion made a face. "Guess...I call him..."

She hopes the guards know how to deal with him.

----- In Japan ---

At the hotel, Sai places the phone on the nightstand before sighing. He sighs as Terry finishes up in the bathroom. He already got dressed for the night. After that talk with Nezu and Aizawa, things are starting to connect. Now he wonders how does Port Mafia is related to Yuuka's kidnapping. Should he go to Yokohoma and investigate? Trying to find out about a criminal organization isn't a good look.

Although...Aizawa says he knows someone in an agency that deals with them as they are on the right side of the law. The Armed Detective Agency.

Maybe they should go there. It's just a 30-minute train. But not right now.

"Something on your mind?" Terry asked. Sai blinked, "Nothing. I was wondering how to make use of this week given the information we now know from UA. I was thinking of going to Yokohoma and ask the agency who knows Port Mafia.

"You know? That's exactly what I'm thinking." Terry asked. Sai raised a brow, "Really?" He said. Terry nods, "Yeah. I think we're near the source of the crime scene so why not? I think a day trip for tomorrow would be fine. We just need to let the teacher know."

"Right. I sent him a text tomorrow. He's probably sleeping or on a mission." Sai nods. Terry smiles and goes to sit down next to him. "Also..should we play a little?"

"Huh? Didn't we do it the week before?" Asked Sai. Terry chuckles at that. "Yeah but I bet you're really want to do it."

Sai narrows his eyes at him for a moment before he lets out a yelp when Terry goes to trace his spine. Sai closes his eyes, "Fine...let's do it."

And so their night begins.

----------

Mmmfm~!"

Sai is on the bed, moaning into the pillow as Terry is snapping his hips into him letting out grunts. After being teased for so long, Sai wants Terry to hurry as he can't stand it.

"Fuck..." Sai keeps forgetting how good this is. Then he felt sharp little knives into his shoulder. Sai hisses but doesn't resist as Terry bites down and kicks the blood.

"Ha..ha..." Sai utters while Terry pounds downwards. Sai moans into the pillow even more before his head is lifted.

"I want to hear you. Don't hide it." Terry growled. Sai lets out moans for him to hear. Terry chuckles at his neck. "That's it, good boy." He said as he held his hips and male to sure pound Sai at the right angle.

"FUCK! TERRY!" Sai cried out lustfully.

"That's it, little snake. Keep taking this. You deserve this, don't you?" Terry whispers to his ear making the snake shudder, loving his touches. He felt Terry goes to play with pecs before lifting him up and set down on the knees so he could hold him close to him. Back against his chest before pounding him forward making Sai moans.

"Ha...ha...ha.." Sai drools as his eyes become half-lidded, dazed with lust and pleasure. Terry slams his cock forward, before stopping. "AH~!" Sai moaned. "F-fuck! Yes! It's good! G-give me more! Don't stop..."

Chuckling, Terry goes to cover his eyes and goes to kiss him sideways deeply. Sai moans into the kiss, bucking his hips back against him gently. He goes to run his hand down the snake's spine making him shudder and tremble so delightful for him. Soon the kiss breaks, leaving a string of saliva before Terry goes to thrust into him even harder and faster. Sai cries out lustfully with his head thrown back, gripping the sheets of the bed. His wet hole twitched and began to tighten up around the bat's hard cock. This got the bat growling possessively, ramming into Sai hitting those certain spots and making his snake go crazy.

"A-AH! SSSLOW DOWN! YOU'RE AUGH...AHTO-!"

Fuck. I am about to cum! Cum real hard. Sai thought as those intense hits at the spots within him were like shocks of pleasure running up his spine so good, he can't even form sentences.

"Go ahead cum for me. Cum, cum, cum!" Terry urges him. "AAAH! CUMMING!" Sai shouts real hard as he came, spilling his cum onto the bed. Then he feels the bat filling him up with his load. They both panted as Sai hangs his head with his chest heaving.

Terry pulls out of him. Sai hisses, missing the fullness already but he falls onto the bed and rolls on his back, still panting from that hard breeding.

However, they're aren't done yet.

He was lifted once more this time, the bat has him hovering over his throbbing cock not ready to go down after that round. He and his cock wants more of it. Fortunately, the snake smiles a little, now hungry for more before. Terry slams Sai's hips down. His hard cock into his warm tight hole. Sai screams as Terry starts up again with more hard thrusts. The snake claws his back while holding onto him.

"Ah...s-s...ugh...uuh..augh..nuuugh!" Sai can't form words making the bat grunts and growls, continuing his pounding into him.

Soon, they will change their position with Sai on his back and Terry now pounding him downwards in a mating press. Sai looks up to the ceiling as his legs became limp due to ongoing rough breeding. His eyes dazed and his mouth open letting a long string of moans and cries.

Sai can't imagine if any of his fellow officers had a relationship with their former charge like this. Or was he the only one?

----- Somewhere in America ----

"Ha...ha...fuck..."

Right now, Officer Knight is with his former charge, Davion. Their relationship is now of...well...Rust couldn't describe it. He finds out that Davion takes down bounties and comes to the station to claim the money. That's what he does. So Rust works with him on any bounties that come up. After Davion tracks them down and hands them off to him they can processed and be sent to court then to jail.

He has to give Davion the money at his apartment. Of course...

"D-davion...mmfmm"

Money isn't the only thing.

"That's right....keep moving your hips, little treasure."

It's doing this.

A sexual transaction.

The blond moans as he is naked and bare. His body flushed in heat and sweat as he kept moving up and down on the dragon's hard girth. Rust is on top of Davion doing their usual thing. Davion grunts as he thrusts up, matching the hips of their movements. He had Rust's hands held by his as the knight kept on riding him.

Then his knight goes to bounce faster and harder making the dragon wince at the sudden pace. Rust moans louder now as he is closing his eyes hard as he wants the dragon's cock hit those sweet spots of his.

"Ha...you love this, do you?" Davion smirks. "You want more of this cock, you couldn't get enough..hm?"

"Fuck...yeah..." Rust answers. "It's...ugh..you fault i...like this." He growls. Davion laughs, hearing this. "Oh?"

He snaps his hips up that makes Rust yelp. A wave of pleasure made him shudder with a breathless moan.

"Guess I will be responsible then." Davion said before delivering upwards thrusts into Rust's hole hitting those spots making him moan and cry. The blond's back arches a little at the pleasure, getting him to ride him even faster.

"Mffmmm..fuck...r-right there...please!" Rust begged. "I-i..."

"Yeah...you don't want this to stop. Don't worry...we got all night." He smiles. Then right away, he shifts their position as he picks Rust up and lays him down, having his legs hang over his shoulder before thrusting him down. With his mouth open, the knight screams in pleasure as he is now gripping the edge of the bed.

Fuck! It's so deep now! Rust thought as he shut his eyes tight as Davion slammed his hips down and lifted them once before doing it again. Developing a deep rhythm that made Rust's blood run on adrenaline due to the pleasurable sensation he is receiving. There is a drool at the corner of the blond's mouth as he is whimpering and moaning. But then...he shouts as Davion got a good angle at his peculiar spot.

"N-not there! Fuck! NOT THERE!"

"Why? Isn't this good? You trying to move up but can't. You love this dragon pinning you down and ravish you like a treasure you are!" He said, thrusting now rougher making Rust cry out lustfully.

"AH--ha! Mmfmm...ha...fuck! So deep!"

Davion slams his hips, coming to stop and grinds ever so slowly so the other can feel him. Rust's breath hitches, "Ah..ha..." The blond widen his eyes, wondering why he stopped.

"Well? Am I wrong?"

"Fuck...I-I" Rust winced.

"Hm?"

"N-no...you're not wrong! Fuck! Please! Do not stop! I-I want..." Rust is having trying finishing his sentences due to the other's hard big cock inside, rubbing the right places making the other burn for him.

"You want more of it?" Davion teased. Rust growls as his blue eyes become crimson red.

"YES YOU FREAKING CRAZY DRAGON!" Rust shouted out of frustration. This got Davion to laugh and go even harder on his loving knight making him moan even more.

"Don't worry...I make sure to fuck you every single day, my treasure." Davion tells him as he goes to lift him up and fucks him upwards while his knight holds onto him for dear life. "Yes, yes, yes! Please!"

The two spend the rest of their day without incident.

---- Northern State Penitentiary ---

However, there are other relationships to explore. Like one in prison right now.

In Shrika's room and office, she is kissing her fellow officer, Willie Watts who is moaning and such. 'S-shrika."

"Willie. You have been very good today." Shrika smiles, "You have been making sure to keep those inmates in line for me. I can't thank you enough." Shrika smiles at his ear.

"Oh..well...i-i-i'ts my job.." Willie then whimpered when Shrika kissed and nipped on his neck. His face became blushing red as he was being rewarded by his Mistress right now. He used to be a prisoner here after a certain bullying incident. He was assigned to Area A where Shrika rules. At first, Willie wonders how could someone like her could manage a place like this. The place seems ordinary and anyone can get out of it. But that's one of the reasons.

So Shrika can catch them for fun and bring them back for more discipline.

It was shrewd and cunning. Willie had never seen. But she held her own in her own beautiful way. One time, he tried escaping with a few other prisoners, only to be caught again but this time by her bird form. When he saw it, he was terrified yet in awe. He admires those great dark wings whose feathers shine and her vicious talons that can easily tear guts out of a person. He did put off a fight but her great supersonic power made him weak enough to be taken back. Taken back by flight.

When he was brought back for Shrika to punish her. The first thing that came out of his mouth was that she was beautiful. He wasn't sure what face he was making. Probably stupid.

Shrika widens her eyes slightly with her maroon eyes shining at that compliment. Of course, Willie quickly apologizes for the comment, and he accepts any punishment given to him. He doesn't know why he said that but maybe because he rebels against those who think they are strong. But Shrika is different, she makes up her strength by relying on her smarts and power.

However, Willie's punishment is different from the others. In fact, Shrika favors him so much since that day, he can't help being happy when it comes to her punishments and rewards.

"Ah...ha...your soft fingers.." Said Willie as he was leaning against her while Shrika played with Willie by inserting her fingers into him slowly and deeply. It made the esper's legs twitch and tremble.

"You like that, don't you?" Shrika whispers into his ear. Willie nods weakly. "Yes!" Then a thought came to him. "Miss...Shrika...are we going to do that again?"

"That?" Shrika asked, looking curious. Willie utters as he pants, "That...when you claim me..."

Shrika's eyes lit as she knew what her adorable esper knows what he's talking about. Shrika smiles widely, "Of course. We can do that if you like. I was planning to do that anyway. After that, you can claim me as well then we can go back to doing that again. Would you like that? I got a bit bigger one so that's why I'm doing this."

Willie nods his head vigorously. "Y-yes please!"

And that's how their relationship went.

"Ahh...fuck...Mistress! R-right there! So good!" Said Willie as he is being pounded by Shrika using a strap-on. Shrika holds onto her pet by his hips as she slams her hips into him. Hearing his cries and moan got her more into this. Wanting to claim Willie even more. This got Shrika burn for her loving pet, "Oh Willie~! You sound so nice for me! Let's keep going till recess!" Shrika moaned with a lustful smile.

"Y-yes!" Willie cried.

"And after that, we can do it again at night. A night just for us!" Shrika goes to change the pace harder and faster, moving her hips even faster. Willie grips the desk tighter as he moans out. "T-that would be amazing. Y-yes please!" He can't wait for the night to arrive so he can spend more time with her.

"That's great to hear it!" Shrika laughed, "Now let's see you cum from your cock!"

"Y-yes...at your command!" Willie replied as he continues to cry out inside her office.

Out of everyone, Shrika is the first to develop a relationship with her former prisoner. She asked Warden Osamu for permission to make Willie her fellow officer once his sentence ended. It was approved right away.

However... in other areas, there are different results.

---- Area D ----

Gin Akutagawa got into another fight again. This time, it wasn't her fault. The other prisoner tried to stab her with a shiv. Charlie suspected it was some kind of assassination attempt since Akutagawa was part of the Port Mafia. Of course, some people dared to try to take a shot at them. Gin Akutagawa is one of them.

However, Gin Akutagawa can't be taken down as she managed to throw the assassination against her and take the prisoner's eye out. Right away, the situation was resolved as everyone got the area on lockdown. The prisoner was sent to the infirmary run by Cobin, his team, and his machines. Gin was taken to the solitary cell for her own safety.

However, Gin is pissed off enough that Jason was surprised by her sudden strength when he tries to usher her to the cell. Right away, Jason was tripped and is now on the ground with Gin Akutagawa on top. She had a knife at his neck. "I rather you not touch me." She said dangerously. Seriously...where does she put her knives?!

Jason gulps. He didn't realize it before but...Gin Akutagawa smells really nice. Wait what?! What is he thinking?!

Ever since Gin came to prison, Jason is watching over her. She is doing okay. Though..she is always by herself during recess or in her cell. He saw her eat once without her face mask. It was....something out of a painting. She had her smooth long hair down instead of her usual skipy bun. The way she eats is gentle and so manner-like. Her fingers look delicate and small. It was dainty and she seemed so young with porcelain skin. It makes Jason want to protect her so badly from external dangers. But he had to remind herself that she might be using her beauty to let people guard's but that's not it! Maybe she dresses the way in order to avoid getting the attention of men which makes sense!

Though her smell. Jason won't forget it. She has that smell unlike no other. How can he describe it? His wolf keen of smell is sensitive but Gin's aroma is easy and pleasing. It's like lavender or rose. It made him relaxed not to mention....

"Officer Woofhees...are you hard?" Asked Gin. This got Jason to snap out of his thoughts, seeing a surprised Gin and looks down getting his cheeks flushed pink. He quickly answers, "W-what?! No! I-"

Gin raises a brow but Jason's expression as she goes to move her hips against the tent in his pants. Jason utters a whine sound out of his control. That there says it all.

Hm. Maybe I should play with this doggy. Gin thought.

"It's alright." Gin said gently which got Jason blinking dumbfounded. Then Gin begins to grind against him slowly. This got Jason yelping.

"H-hey stop this!" Jason exclaimed.

"Why?" Gin asked innocently.

"Because...because...shit..." Jason panted. Gin chuckles now. "It's alright. You must be like this because of the women here, right?"

"No!" Jason said. It's not true. It's not because of that. It's because of her! But he won't say that! Shit! Jason doesn't see the other female prisoners that way. After all...they're freaking crazy and some of them pretty fucked up.

But Gin....she seems sane and yet...has the right level of crazy if she is in Port Mafia. Not to mention, she is very feminine and beautiful with her smooth silk and black hair. Wait, wait, wait! What is he thinking?!

Then Gin goes to bounce on his lap making Jason hiss and gasp. "Wait..wait...stop! Don't...I.."

"Ah..ha...don't move," Gin said as she continued her movements making Jason flush even redder. How can this woman...who is shorter than him do something like this. To him. He is usually top and always makes sure the ladies are taken care of at his favorite tavern but now...this lady got him under some kind of spell he can't move only to obey.

Jason pants.

"Does it feel good? I heard werewolves or lycans have a certain heat cycle. Have you been reliving yourself lately?" Said Gin continuing with movement. Jason closed his hands into fists but didn't move. "I...i.."

"I mean..."

"Let's get you better." Said Gin as goes to slip her hands between the buttoned sides of his uniform and starts to touch his abs making Jason yelped. "S-stop! I order you ah!" Gin slams her hips down. "You feel so wet there, Officer Woofhess. Do you want me to make you feel better?

"Yes-no-no...please!" Jason is now begging as Gin continues her ministrations at his hard cock that is hiding his pants. Then Jason felt his belt come undone and his own cock is now being stroked. "N-no..augh! Please stop! Someone will-"

"Don't worry...I make sure it will be quick.' And already, Gin proceeds to stroke him faster and faster. How can she do this?! Where did this come from?! How can she do with her gentle hands like that? Jason had to hide his face.

"Usually...I like cats better than dogs. But for you, I can be an exception since you're so cute under me. A strong werewolf coming undone like this. Under me. It's cute really." Gin smiles behind her mask.

"G-gin!" Jason gasped.

"Maybe I should put a collar on you and make you do tricks for me..." Gin said so nicely and gently. The mere idea of what she is suggesting is something he wanted. To experience under her.

"How does that sound, Jason?" Gin asked suggestively.

Upon hearing this name, Jason came to her hand right away. Jason is now gasping as Gin chuckles now, she goes to get up and walks to herself. Jason watches her to go inside her soldiary confidenment. "Tell me..if you need me. I always be there." She said before closing the door herself. Leaving a confused werewolf processing this.

Did that just happen???

------ Area E -----

Similar to Gin Akutagawa's situation, someone try to kill Ryunosuke Akutagawa. Or rather tried. The assassin didnt get too far. In fact, that idiot managed to disable the collar that keep Ryunosuke powers on check and now he is running lose, killing all those prisoners.

"Uh...sir! Shouldn't we do something?!" His assistant fellow officer, Wade cried. The gator looked so worried that made Matt laughed. "Oh come on, Wade. Let him run free for a moment. Heck, I even disable some of the collars on the prisoners."

"You what?!" Wade exclaimed.

"Just to make it more fair." Matt shrugs. "Besides look...there's no wonder why he is called the Black Fang Hellhound of Port Mafia. He's so cute!"

Cute?! Wade thought, watching Ryunosuke tear the other prisoners apart with a killer look in his eyes. The prisoners were sliced apart like nothing. Blood spills on the walls, floor, and ceiling. The prisoners using their powers were about to jump him but some of them were impaled by tendrils form his clothing. "But the prisoners..."

"Serial killers, r*pists, hired guns, gangsters, and war criminals." Said Matt. "What's left? I mean...Area E holds the worst of the worst. A perfect forest if you ask. They shouldn't complain since they live for it." Matt said. "After all....Pete was given horrible s*x offenders and child killers. Those guys don't last long in that prison. In fact, they usually get killed there right away. They won't be missed given how bad their crimes were." Matt shrugs. "Sid got the white-collar criminals. Shrika got the ones who think they're hot shit but nothing but small fry and fun to play with. Willie looks after the metahuman criminals. Jason and Charlie got the females that are also dangerous. Charlie is good at breaking them down. As for me, the Warden gives me control over how to run this area. He told me to have fun with it and let him in some tournaments. Here and there. After all, we're the prison that makes the worst inmates beg for death and fear for their lives at the same time."

"So...." Wade begins. "What about Cobin and Lex?"

"Oh, those two. Cobin helps with the injuries and sometimes does organ donations. Lex makes sure nothing escapes his sight if something happens. He is usually with Dazai for protection. Though, Pete handles the surveillance of the place."

"Anyway....I will let get in just about...now." Matt goes to jump over the railing. "Officer Knack!" Wade cried. Matt held his hand up, "Not to worry. I'm fine, I got this."

"Ryunosuke. Are you done with your fill?" Matt asked as Ryunosuke heard his voice and attacked with Rashomon. Right away, Matt smacks the trend away with a powerful hit.

"!" Ryunosuke widens his eyes at this. What the?

'Surprised?" Matt asked. Ryunosuke can't help but smirk, "Actually I am. I am going to have a fun time killing you, you damn guard!"

"Go ahead and try! Let's make this fun!" Matt grins as his eyes glow ready. Thus, the battle between the Killer Night and the Hellhound commenced.

To be continued....

#ic #thesilverpeahenresidence #phantomslasher #machinedestroyer #older rust #older sai #older jason #older ocs #Officer;Au #YoungAdult;AU #An Officer's Corruption; drabble series #drabble;#drabbletime #drabble #vaninkthedragon #an officer's corruption #An Officer's Corruption; Part 29 #older matt

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apinkylemon · 8 months

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English translation for Nana 7.8 Ai Yazawa Interview (Part 1)

This are the original scans from my original 7.8 copy:

PLEASE READ THIS NOTES BEFORE READING THE INTERVIEW

NOTE 1: I'm not a professional translator, i did this the best i could, english is not my first language so there may be misspelled things

NOTE 2: This interview is from the 7.8 fanbook published between volumes 7 and 8 of Nana, when Yazawa talks about the characters you have to keep in mind what we knew about them at that point and not what they did or became latter in the story

Thank you

MISATO REPORTS - 30 QUESTIONS TO AI YAZAWA (1 to 8)

Hi, this is Misato. Today i've the pleasure and the great opportunity to interview Ai Yazawa, author of the series. Next you will discover things that were not known until now.

Question 1: Who is your favorite character?

I don't have a preference for anyone. I love them all. < i don't know how to translate "que no se diga" but it means that no one can tell her anything for preferring one character or another > (laughs)

Question 2: Which character is more difficult to draw?

Hachi. But lately she's got a sweeter expression and a more femenine body, so it's getting easier every time. Before se had a mix between a small-town girl and lack of femininity that made it more complicated. Regarding characters that I find it difficult to draw for personality reasons...nobody

Question 3: What character would you like to be your lover?

Um, as a lover i don't know, but to fall in love I would choose Takumi. Love, the more complicated it is, the more you fight for it. To get married, instead, maybe I would choose Kyosuke, because he has a < here it says "machista" which means "misogynist" but i think it could be a translation error and really meaning "masculine"> side (laughs). See, he gets his girlfriend to cook him fried eggs (laughs)

Question 4: Who would you have as a friend?

Shoji and Hachi. I would love to take care of Hachi. Well, I couldn't stop looking out for her. Shoji is the typical guy with whom you have a good time and that never gives you a bad face. It's important not liking i'm as a boyfriend (laughs)

Question 5: Who would you like to be family with?

I would like Ren and Reira to be my older siblings. And as younger siblings i would have Shin and Misato. Imagine what a scene of beauties! If Junko was my older sister, maybe she would be scolding me all day and it could be a bit annoying (laughs). I prefer taking care of others.

Question 6: Which boyfriend do you like the most for Hachi?

Well, i think it would be Takumi. You are going to think that I have a predilection for Takumi (laughs) Asano, Shoji and Nobu don't fit my ideal man idea.

Question 7: If you were a man, who would you have as a girlfriend?

Hachi without hesitation! I would gladly take care of her. Even if she put me in the middle of her hurricane, I wouldn't have a problem. I wish I could became Takumi so I could date Hachi (laughs)

Question 8: Is there a character with whom you feel identified?

There are parts of me in each one of them. People aorund me say that i'm like Junko, but i think i'm not. I'm too soft with everyone (laughs)

Misato: This is not over yet!

Part 2 of 3 coming soon

#nana #nana anime #ai yazawa #ai yazawa manga #ai yazawa interview #nana 7.8 #nana osaki #nana komatsu #nana manga

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ljxlj48 · 1 year

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A Racer's Heart

Chapter 03

F1Driver!Jeno X Reader X F1Driver!Jaemin

Preview, 01, 02, 03, 04, 05…

Genre: love triangle, co-workers to lovers, slight enemies to lovers

Warnings: swearing, suggestive content, drugs, alcohol, angst, dangerous situation

Word Count: 3.1K+

Author's Note: I am not good at making sure I got all the warnings, so if you guys think I should include something please let me know. Also after this chapter most of the story revolves around their relationships rather than the sport, so it should pick up from here on out. hugs and kisses to anyone reading <3333

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“16 turns, two DRS zones, I want you to make sure that no one is within a second of you on the straights, that’s basically going to be like…”

“Like giving my position away,” Jeno cuts off your statement as you both walk into the garage. “I got this y/n, it’s not my first time racing in Barcelona.”

“I know,” you conceid.

“It’s only practice today, I’m gonna be okay,” Jeno spoke slowly and reassuringly. He knew. He can’t say how he knows, but he knows that you become extra anxious when he is out on the circuit. He knows that you hold onto your breath whenever you watch him overtake someone. He knows you don’t stop until he’s out of the car. He knows you’re waiting for him to come back at the end of every race. He knows it.

“I know,” you try to smile reassuringly. You don’t know if you’re trying to reassure yourself or Jeno right now. But you try.

Barcelona goes by faster than you anticipate. You imagine that it goes by even faster for Jeno. You stand on the sidelines throughout the weekends, watching Jeno on the circuit, on his media duties, on his press conferences. You watch Jeno’s relationship with the team grow and grow. His mechanics are starting to get comfortable around him. The pit crew is talking more with him. Jeno was always a friendly person, he could never stand someone not liking him. Even his and Jaemin’s relationship has picked up.

They’re beginning to look like the best of friends nowadays. When you guys finally make it to Monaco, there isn’t a moment where they are separated from each other. All their media duties are being done together. The marketing team loves the amount of free and openly available content they can use. The fans are loving it, you think you saw a ship post the other day on social media. And both of them are starting to do better during the races too.

P6 and P7 for Jeno and Jaemin, respectively, in Barcelona. Then P5 and P6, for Jaemin and Jeno, respectively, in Monaco.

You stood outside the media bullpen, watching the two of them conduct their post-race interviews in Monaco. “Jaemin, this is the first race of the season that you out-qualified and outperformed your teammate, do you think it’s about time?”

You held your breath waiting for Jaemin’s response, you could hear him chuckle a bit. “I mean, it feels great to get great results for the team and myself, but like I said in past races, my failure to perform at a high level early on in the season is my fault alone. And I think if I work hard at it, I will continue to have performances like I did this afternoon.”

“Thank you Jaemin,” the reporter said. You let out your breath after hearing Jaemin’s response. You decided at that time maybe it was best to be on your way, gather your notes to present to Jeno about the race.

Just as you walked away, you heard someone call out to you. You turned back around to spot Jaemin waving you down. “y/n?”

“Yes?” you took this moment to take all of Jaemin in. He was extremely handsome, his racesuit half off tied around his waist. The fireproofs were hugging his biceps perfectly, and the sweat dripping down the side of his face, gave him a sultry look. You found yourself licking your lips.

“Me and some of the team are going out to a nightclub tonight, join us?”

“Um, I don’t know Jaemin. I’m not that familiar with the Monaco night scene.”

“Come on y/n, you’ll be with me there won’t be anything to worry about,” Jaemin added, trying to convince you. “Jeno also said he was gonna come out tonight.”

You were taken aback slightly by the mention of Jeno. He usually always invites you out with him whenever he’s going out. You wondered why he didn’t invite you tonight, writing it off as maybe he forgot or maybe he wasn’t actually going to go out tonight. “I still have some work to do, I don’t know what time I’ll finish.”

“y/n, we don’t have to be in Azerbaijan until next week,” Jaemin tilted his head a bit to the right, his eyes piercing right through you, “I’ll pick you up from the hotel at 8, be ready.”

Before you could protest anymore, Jaemin walked away. Not that you were really going to protest. Jaemin was infamous for getting anyone and everyone to agree with his agendas. You also thought that maybe you could use a night out, especially since everyone always talks about the Monaco night scene. And if anything Jeno might be there, so it won’t be so bad.

You travel from country to country, not in one place for too long that you don’t really pack a lot of clothes. You probably had everything that was in your luggage sprawled out on your bed. Jaemin said he was gonna pick you up at 8, and you weren’t ready to go until 7:59. You made sure to use up all your time in getting ready for tonight.

The car ride to the nightclub was short, Jaemin didn’t speak much, or at all. He greeted you when you entered the car, but nothing more than that. When you guys arrived, Jaemin took your arm, as he walked you into the club. The small gesture causes a flurry of butterflies in your stomach. However that soon would disappear, when you lost Jaemin into the crowd. The first minute or 15 didn’t bother you, as you knew Jaemin was popular, and there were probably a lot of people for him to greet.

It wasn’t until you spent the greater part of an hour trying to figure out where Jaemin was, in a packed nightclub. You thought about getting a cab to take you back to your hotel, as you weren’t that comfortable being out by yourself.

“What’s a pretty girl doing alone here?” someone had come up to ask you.

“Oh,” you tried to laugh it off, “I'm here with a friend we just got separated from each other for a second.”

“Well let's sit at the bar and try to find them.” the guy suggested with a smile, your gut told you to say no. To say that you could find Jaemin on your own, but your mind was telling you to calm down.

“Okay,” you said, as you let them lead you to the bar.

You found a singular seat at the bar. The guy said he didn’t mind standing and letting you sit. He began to talk, asking what your friend looked like to help keep an eye out, for you. You gave Jaemin’s description, you didn’t want to expose the fact that you were with a world renowned race car driver.

“Look, whoever your friend is, he’s an ass for leaving you alone like this,” the guy spoke frankly to you. You could tell he was attempting to make a move on you, but you left your guards up.

“He really didn’t mean to leave me alone, he just went to greet some people he knew and we got separated.” You came to Jaemin’s defense, making up false excuses for him. When quite frankly, he was being an ass. You told him you weren’t familiar with the Monaco night scene, and he still insisted for you to come along. Just to leave you the second you got here.

While you continued to look around the club to hopefully see any familiar face, the guy that was standing by you at the bar continued to make small talk. In order to pass the time, and to appear not being rude, you entertained the conversation. The guy standing in front of you had to be over six feet tall, with a fair complexion, and piercing eyes. Most definitely European, he had dark hair, and his accent made him sound French. But everyone here speaks French.

He was actually being fairly respectful, he didn’t invade your personal space without asking. He never touched you, and he kept his hands where you could see them. He also pretended to look for Jaemin in the crowd with you. He was being so nice, that you felt bad for keeping your guard up.

“We still didn’t find your friend, let me at least get you a drink,” he asked.

“Okay, a martini, dry,” you took a breath, “please.”

“You got it.”

You let him talk to the bartender while you continued to look into the crowd trying to find Jaemin. You wouldn’t be so hell bent on finding Jaemin, but he was your ride, and you don’t even know what club you are at tonight.

“Here is your drink,” the guy said, as he picked up his beer from the counter, and you turned around to pick up your martini. “If your friend is as good as you say he is, i’m sure he’ll come looking for you.”

“He better, he’s my ride back to the hotel.”

“Hotel? You don’t live here?” You took a sip from your drink. Wrong move, never let a stranger know you’re just a tourist. “Neither do I, I was just here for the Grand Prix. Were you here for that too?”

You calmed down, the alcohol in your drink loosening you up a bit, “yeah, I actually was.”

“Amazing race wasn’t it? Do you have a favorite team or maybe driver?”

“It was a good race, my favorite driver is Lee,” you answered.

“Ah yes, my favorite would have to be Pierre, gotta support the French.”

“And what about Ocon?”

“Maybe not all the French,” the guy joked and you laughed. The more the conversation went on, the more relaxed you felt. The guy in front of you was doing an excellent job of making you laugh, that you began to forget about Jaemin or even attempted to look for him. You stopped trying to look for anyone, instead just focusing on the guy in front of you. You were actually having trouble focusing on anything except the guy in front of you.

It must be the alcohol, you thought. It was too strong, you must be starting to become a lightweight. You could’ve sworn you could hold your liquor better than this. You decided that you were gonna go to the restroom, trying to splash some water on your face to sober up. You relayed your thoughts to the guy in front of you.

As soon as you got up from the bar stool, the room started to spin. “Woah, you okay there?” the guy in front of you asked.

“Yeah, I just need to get my feet under me,” you slurred your words together. This most definitely wasn’t just alcohol.

“Let me help you,” the guy suggested. You tried to push him off, but it felt like his grip was starting to tighten. You felt him start to push you, not being gentle with his movement.

When you first got to the club you made a note of where the restroom was, just as an old habit. In a moment of flight or fight, you found the strength to push him off. The guy released his grip, and you shoved your way through the crowd to the bathroom. As soon as you got inside, you found a stall and locked yourself inside.

You grabbed your phone out from your purse, your mind only drawing one conclusion. You needed to call Jeno. You wanted to just close your eyes while you let the phone ring. You could hear Jeno answer the phone, you began to mumble a few things, trying to tell Jeno what happened. You hope, and pray that he understands you enough.

“Excuse me, is there a y/n in here?” you heard what sounded like a young woman ask.

“Here,” you slurred, raising your hand to unlock the bathroom stall.

The girl offered a sad smile, “your boyfriend Jeno is here to get you, he’s right outside.”

You nodded your head, as she helped you to your feet. When you made it out of the restroom, Jeno was right there, waiting for you. He was still dressed in his sweats, his hair was disheveled, he looked like someone that just got out of bed.

“Thank you,” Jeno thanked the girl, taking you from her. Your mind was still a bit foggy, but you had enough sense of understanding what everyone around you was saying.

Jeno began to lead you out to the front, “did I wake you? I didn’t mean to wake you, I’m sorry Jeno. I know I shouldn’t have gone out tonight.” You were saying, more like mumbling and slurring, the first thoughts that came to your mind, not having enough strength to filter through them. “I promise no more going out, I’ll be a good girl from now on. I won’t cause you anymore trouble Jeno.”

Jeno didn’t acknowledge your mumblings, thinking that you guys could talk about it in the morning when you were fully sober. He just wanted to get you back to the hotel already. He didn’t want to be here much longer, and he especially didn’t want the media to see either of you guys here, like this.

Before Jeno could make it out the front doors, from the shadows emerged Jaemin. “Dude you made it,” Jaemin, who was clearly heavily intoxicated, caught Jeno’s other arm, not seeing Jeno holding you up on the other side initially. “y/n is supposed…”

Jeno turned, stopping Jaemin from saying anything more.

“What…what happened?” Jaemin asked, as he looked at you, clearly out of it. The sight of you, causing any effects of the previously consumed alcohol to wear off.

“I don’t know, you tell me Jaemin, you’re the one that was here not me.” Jeno was fuming, as he was beginning to have a vague understanding of what had happened.

“Jen, I…”

“She called me crying and slurring her words, she could barely put two words together, let alone a complete sentence to tell me what she drank, or where she was, or who she was with.” There were stories about how scary Jeno was when he’s mad, but Jaemin always thought that was just people exaggerating to give Jeno a bad boy image. Jaemin knows now it’s not an exaggeration. “What did you give her, Jaemin?”

“Jeno, I swear I didn’t do this to her.”

“Well if you didn’t do it, you let it happen.”

The next morning you woke up with the worst headache of your life. You were laying in your bed, in your hotel room, you looked over to see Jeno sleeping in one of the chairs with just a jacket covering his arms. You got out of bed, placing the blanket you were originally wrapped in on him, and heading to the shower. Last night was still a bit blurry in your mind, you remembered going to the club with Jaemin. You remembered meeting a stranger there, you remembered running to the bathroom.

You just don’t remember anything after being in the bathroom. After you got out of the shower, brushed your teeth, and put on fresh clothes, you still saw Jeno sleeping peacefully on the chair in the corner. You decided to get some coffee and breakfast for Jeno when he woke up. You grabbed your phone and wallet before heading downstairs.

Looking at your phone, you notice several missed calls from Jaemin and even more unread text messages. Before you could respond to any of them, you ran into Jaemin in the elevator, heading downstairs.

“I was just coming to see you,” Jaemin said with an air of worry.

“Why?” you question with a bit of an awkward smile.

“Are you okay? Last night…” before Jaemin could say anymore, your phone started to ring. Jeno’s name appears on the screen.

“Sorry Jaemin, let me just answer this.” You slide the green button on your screen, answering your phone for Jeno. “Hello,” you answered.

“y/n, where are you?” Jeno spoke quickly.

“I’m heading downstairs, I was gonna bring you a coffee and some breakfast.”

“Why didn’t you wake me, I would’ve gone with you.”

“You looked tired, I wanted to let you sleep,” you answered. Jaemin is only able to hear your side of the conversation, slowly putting the pieces together in his own mind. Jaemin knows Jeno picked you up from the club, he knows Jeno brought you back to the hotel, and now he knows that you and Jeno slept in the same room last night.

“Wait in the lobby for me, I’ll come downstairs and we’ll go together.” Jeno said, before hanging up the phone.

You sighed, “I’m sorry Jaemin, what were you saying earlier now?” you turned your attention back to Jaemin.

“I just wanted to make sure you were okay from last night, I’m sorry about…”

“Do you remember what happened last night?”

“Huh?” Jaemin looked at you confused, he only remembered what he did last night. He remembers leaving you alone last night, after telling you, you had nothing to worry about. He remembers Jeno staring holes through his head. He remembers seeing you leaving with Jeno.

“I mean,” you sighed, knowing that you should be able to remember, you just couldn’t. “I know we went to the club together, I know I met a guy at the bar, I remember going to the restroom, but everything else is a blur. And even the parts I do remember are blurry.”

Just at that moment, both you and Jaemin arrived on the lobby floor. Jaemin let you step out of the elevator first. “We did go to the club together, and I left you, alone.” Jaemin said. “I’m sorry y/n, I should have never left you alone that night. I told you that I would stay with you and I didn’t, this is my fault.”

You nodded your head, “thank you for apologizing.” You thanked Jaemin, even though you weren’t entirely sure why he was apologizing to you.

“y/n,” you turned to see Jeno stepping off the other elevator, walking towards you. You watched Jeno, give Jaemin the dirtiest look, before checking on you. “You okay?”

“Yeah of course,” you answered.

“Let’s go get breakfast,” Jeno said, pulling you away. You waved a little ‘bye’ to Jaemin, before walking away.

“That was a bit rude,” you spoke candidly to Jeno, after the two of you stepped away from Jaemin.

“What?”

“You didn’t greet Jaemin, that was a bit rude Jeno.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Jeno dismissed, as he dropped his arm around your shoulders, pulling you a little closer as the two of you walked out the lobby doors. You looked back to still see Jaemin standing there, watching the two of you go.

-----------------------

Taglist: @90sgatsby-jjh@neothingss@lanadreamie@cuteejeno

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vole-mon-amour · 2 years

Text

6x21.

Derek: "And she didn't know the UnSub was waiting for her? C'mon."

Spencer: "Villain."

Derek: "What?"

Spencer: "In the movies they're called villains."

Derek: "My bad."

What I can't get over is that irl they're not called UnSubs, too. The writers really created this terminology & went with it, making people that actually work in this field cringe.

You know when parents pretend about something with their young children in order for their children to learn and not being disappointed by the lack of their parents' reaction? David is doing the same with Spencer. What a good dad. x)

I love the unspoken rule within the team of "Rossi and Hotch sit next to each other", leaving an empty chair for one of them next to another one at the time either of them is absent/late.

"Where do you wanna sit?" — "Next to you."

This isn't from the show, but if you know, you know.

Aaron "I-know-your-politics-and-fuck-off-kindly-please-and-thank-you" Hotchner. <3 Idk if it's just me, but IDK what should happen for me to start liking Strauss.

Can we appreciate the timing? Someone Aaron can truthfully talk to just walks into the room while Strauss orders him to talk about it with someone. Why find Strauss when Aaron can sit down with David again & David can create a report? Like, c'mon, a scene from 6x20 literally exists. We could have that again & more of it.

David immediately offering his help & Aaron's quiet & soft "Tell me about it." How about Aaron thinking for a moment & going, "You know, I think you might have make my grief assessment." Even though David dislikes doing the paperwork, it's not that of a burden when Aaron is involved. He'd do it for him.

I can I can also imagine Aaron talking to Strauss, hating it, then coming home to David & David comforting him & making him better. Might as well write it. So many plot bunnies...

Spencer doesn't need to be taught things, he's already smart and experienced enough (and, even though David technically has more experience, Spencer has an amazing memory, he's savvy, so they're kind of even in this), but the way I see this as a family business and a proud dad watching his son helping on the case and doing great. x)

Ok, two quick unrelated questions:

I've seen David wearing that ring non-stop of his since the moment he came back to BAU. What significance does it hold to him? UPD: Joe said on his twitter that it's a 25 y.o. BAU ring, which only proves that he's the same workaholic that Aaron is. They ARE married to each other.

2. Why the hell doesn't the team goes to the possible victim's house first? Ah, we found our killer, let's kindly visit their apartment first, just in case. If you know that the killer is searching for his new victim & or already know who he's planning to attack, go secure them first?? I don't get it. They found out that the killer wants to (more likely) hurt his stepmother, but they visit his apartment in the middle of the day, hoping for what? That he's waiting for them to arrest him? Lol.

This sassy bastard. :D Hotch got it all in him.

Maybe he knows that they're not getting any new agents to the team rn, so he has no other choice rather than to teach her (when he doesn't have to, it's a dangerous situation). Luckily, just 3 more episodes until she goes away & I get my girls back, both of them. <3

Aside from the obvious, I dislike even the way Seaver tries to talk to victims. It's like she's a talking robot reading from a programmed script. "I had to be agressive towards you in order to gain Gregg's trust," she says in an automatic voice. "None of this wasn't your fault," she continues with a resting bitch face. Girl, you ok?

Aaron, David, Derek, Emily, JJ, even Spencer, they all empathize with the victims, they're gentle with them, their tone of voice is immediately changing. Sometimes rubbing the victims shoulder or patting them on the arm or hugging them is worth thousands of words. They always try to comfort the victim & they mean it. Seaver? No, just no.

This moment at the end will only work as gifs or a video, but how David rushes to kill the killer and Aaron, seeing him getting the shot, ducks.

Those glances, that silent communication, David exhaling and nodding. Good teamwork, you two.

Dads. <3 David would be a good dad & no wonder he can often find common ground with Jack in fanfics. Judging by what I've seen about next episode, he can canonically do that, too. Good for him. <3

#cm #natiswatching #writing ideas #hossi #moreid #david rossi #spencer reid #anti ashley seaver #aaron hotchner #joe mantegna

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makima-s-most-smile · 10 months

Text

Trigun Maximum 1 (Part 2)

*me rushing after the bookclub timeline* My brain does not work in summer heat!

*continues to waffle about the smallesT details* And I will only get worse, nyehehehe

Chapter 03: Bravo Girls!

Meryl!

Uh… Neither can a man?!? Karen, what kind of sexist logic do you have there?

Everyone should be capable and independent, that’s how you avoid landing in abusive situations. (It also does not mean that you shouldn’t rely on people. That’s how communities work.) Knowing your worth and loving yourself is the key here.

Those who know, know -_-

This is the first time that Meryl got any lifesign from Vash for about 2,5 years. She must have thought he died until now. No wonder she is near tears. Her friend is alive! She must feel so relieved! Boyo survived whatever the fifth moon incident has been!

Oh, I immediately dislike Mr. Keele. Keele = Kill, did anyone else zoom in on the phonetic similarities?

Again! Mr. Keele is a tradesman! An Assassin! I didn’t imagine it! Somebody tell me that I didn’t imagine it when I said that Wolfwood literally advertises he’s a trained killer in Ultimate 2! Karen gives Meryl all the hints! “Yeah, I would not want to be there, even if I was you, with Mr. Keele being a killer. Y’know, the ex-elite-military-dude.” We see the penny drop on Meryl’s face!

This has to be one of the bigger cities, since it was build around a ship. But it looks so small. Like 1.000 people, maybe 2000 max. I read somewhere that like 20 Million humans of 100 Million survived the fall (correct me if I remember that incorrectly). But with such small settlements… I cannot believe that. There was surely a second Great Dying in the aftermath, but this… this is so small. And it is a big, well-established city. If Vash is able to run around without people realising who he is, there need to be more people for that anonymity. Big cities offer anonymity, small communities do not!

I like this shot of Vash. He looks like he is Batman, all brooding and watchful. Through that establishing shot, we, as readers, aren’t really surprised when Keele is busted immediately. How exactly, besides Vash being careful, I don’t know. Is it the body language? The way he carries himself and his weapons? Does he hear them talking at the reception desk?

I like this whole scene. Vash is not naive. He knows of the dangers, he knows he is still hunted down, even without the bounty.

Keele is ruthless! To get to his target, he is willing to kill innocents. The woman in the car is an innocent bystander. Vash needs to shield her with his body. While the other assassins until now also killed people, they didn’t use them to get to Vash. That’s a key difference and makes Keele so much more coldblooded.

How much pain tolerance has he? He is smiling and joking after it. Yes, he is showing pain, but he is more obsessed with making everything seem less dire. Of course, Wolfwood sees through it and gets help. I am not sure, he may even carry Vash, since it is highly stupid to let Vash lay there in the open with a fucking hitman on the lose. I wonder how Wolfwood feels when being confronted with that kind of hit man. While we know that Wolfwood is able to “easily” kill, he does not seem like a person who would use innocents to get to his target. He is too direct and honest for that. You could also use the word too ethical, but that is… *looks at the killer for hire part* Well, even professionals have standards?

I love Meryl’s cool speech, but… Keele was hired by her boss. Her boss would have known that Keele is a hit man. Even Karen commented on it. What does that say about her organisation as a whole? I want consequences for it! Be it structural changes or anything, but we never get any. Please, if you have something like this in the story, Nightow, please, do something with it. What are the consequences about this for Meryl and her job, what are the consequences for Milly? Do they report this? It would be in character for both of them! And if they don’t… SHOW IT TO US! PLEASE! What is their reasoning then!

I’d say, Keele is not without logic, but it is not insurance logic. It is the logic that the state works with in “The minority-report”. The idea of a self fulfilling prophecy is also present here, too. Though, it is unethical from the perspective that it infringes on the human’s agency. Another little thing that is important for me (and most likely for Meryl, too) is that Vash is not the disaster! Things happen to and around Vash, but he is not the one who decides to go bat-shit crazy, he runs, he flees and most importantly, he keeps the casualties low! There is no intent there! She would have put that in her reports! Keele didn’t care, her boss didn’t care.

Can you punish someone for something he doesn’t do? It would be punishing his existence.

Keele goes to threaten Meryl with a gun, intending to kill her. He is not only a hit man, he is a murderer. His reasoning is greed and covering his own tracks. You could say, in this chapter, he is somewhat the antithesis to Vash. Vash brings destruction without intent and does his best to avoid it. Keele kills for personal gain without care for anyone other than himself. Who is worse? The answer is easy, but somehow from a purely capitalistic view the insurance agency came to another result.

Meryl thinking back to what Karen said, but I don’t think she thinks about herself in that position. She thinks about Vash and how he is thrown into life threatening situations again and again (at least that is my interpretation) and how he cannot be happy like that. His smiling picture contrasts what they have been through together. Yes, it is a shitty position that Meryl finds herself in, but she chooses to stay at Vash’s side. And damn, that’s fucking nice of her. She is his friend. She is brave. And she has ethics!

Milly to the rescue! I love the whole framing of that pic. Her smile and then the close up that shows it is an angry one!

It’s subtle, but does Meryl help Keele to fly by tripping him? Her position changes so much from the former page. She looks so completely unimpressed by Keele. Also, isn’t it nice that people other than Vash get panty shots, too?

WHY?! You smoked Vash out! You followed him! You literally got into a life threatening situation! Why don’t you go to him? AHHHHHHHHHH

Gosh, Wolfwood is so petty. Yes, he keeps Vash’s ethical standground and does not kill his fellow hitman, but Vash never said something against torture… And I didn't get why his face is so bloody, I thought that was the sauce, but no, he skitted on his face due to Milly's hit. Dayumm.

Meryl’s reasoning reads so weird. She used the vacation to look for him, but now she says that they will deal with him through work… Is it her being shy? And Keele never got busted… Nothing changed at her workplace even though it did something so unethical. I… really don’t like this plotpoint.

Chapter 04: Hero returns

Knives! My second best worstie! New readers still don’t get to know his face! Though, this is a memory from Vash. His brother is distorted to a monstrous being, inhuman with crazy eyes and a smile with so many teeth, it is a threat. Knives is not human, but Vash, his brother, is not human, too.

“Forgetting brings too much sorrow, remembering brings everlasting pain.” That’s grief and it makes Vash's whole being. Sure, if you forget the person you lost, your pain may be gone, but you also lose what made you you. But now, every memory is tainted with the loss. Time should heal those wounds, pain becomes bearable and now painful memories become bittersweet. But I don’t think Vash ever reached that point. Rem is still a sore spot for him, he can’t even talk about her, but she haunts every step. Every scar on his body is a sacrifice to her godhood. Vash is less his own person and more a priest to her existence. While I am sad for Vash, I also feel for Rem. If she was able to know how her son idolises her to his own detriment, she would despair.

Vash having nightmares due to trauma, confirmed.

Damn, that contrast. Wolfwood, the black smudge, between all that white space and all the coffins hanging over his head. We already know that he deals with death at this point, being a gun ho gun and all that shebang, but it also evokes something claustrophobic in me. Wolfwood watching as more and more coffins -corpses- pile up, ready to crush him under their weight. And he just stands and stares.

Wolfwood, the town gossip. “Thank heaven you asked! It’s a long story, though it is kinda a short one! Anyway-”

Eh, the town going all Montaque and Capulet, just without the lovers and more sexual assault. Kinda sad, but that is greed working. The planet truly brings out the worst of humanity. And Vash is still able to be sad about it. Because he knows humanity can be better. And Wolfwood is his bitter, contemptuous self, not without reason. I don’t see him saying that as misanthropy, though. Wolfwood said in his introduction chapter that he has an orphanage to care about. While Vash cares about the whole of humanity, Wolfwood cares for his smaller circle and he needs to stay alive to do so. He cannot allow himself the risk.

And damn, Vash just plainly calling him out for having secrets and Wolfwood again, not denying it and just falling silent. They know. And it hurts.

Brad!

He is 17. Why do 17 year olds in manga either look kawaii or like the worst Jojo-delinquents

His hair reminds me so much of Ryu (or Josuke mixed with Jotaro)

Damn, Brad, you are such an arrogant arsehole here. Oh, yes, the people who are trying their best to survive daily on a planet that is unable to really accommodate their needs are not the nicest around… Dude, you are living at a place that guarantees that your basic needs are taken care of. Brad lived with a priviledge that other people literally would die for. I know Brad will grow on me, but damn, his introduction is always… I wanna kick him! At least you are not as bad as ‘98 Brad.

What conversation? The one about plants? The one about having to kill to protect your close ones? Are you trying to make him understand that you, Wolfwood, need to stay alive to keep the orphanage going? Or the one about you hiding stuff? Are you going to confess? Why you are here, Wolfwood? What is it? It is open to interpretation.

But I love this! This shows what a truly honest and open dude Wolfwood truly is. Yes, he goes so easily on the defensive and, damn, he speaks in absolutes and thus can be seen as condescending. But he reaches out to Vash again and again. He literally runs after him to talk! He tries to go by Vash’s rules. He didn’t kill anyone with his fucking machine gun cross, because Vash asked him to, and that is a feat in on itself.

Oh! There is a new coat in the suitcase, too! Didn’t see that in the first readthrough.

Brad: “I don’t think we have a choice, do we? Lost technology for lost technology.” I read this in my first readthrough as Vash trading stuff with the colony, most likely because I still had the scene with Kaite in my head, where Vash just pulls out a radio in the form of a pen. But now it reads as Brad putting Vash down as a plant and dehumanising him.

No! Vash, you are the fucking gun! Yes, you have dangerous powers, but you did not pull the trigger! I know it feels like it! And damn, your body must feel foreign and hostile to you, but you did not chose this, the responsibility lies not on you, however much you put it onto yourself.

“We have no choice but to depend on him”

“The only one who cannot flee or surrender, who will even return from the dead is that nice man right there.”

Damn, that hurts. I know the doctor has a better relationship with Vash than Brad has, but it reads like they are only using him and that only because there is no other option. It mirrors how Vash treats himself.

Brad struggles with Vash seemingly being immortal and inhuman. His hissy fit kinda fits what is brewing in Wolfwood. But with the Docs explanation of Brad being a fucking brat that has a temper trantrum because his age mate Jessica has a puppy crush on Vash... He is just a fucking hormonal teenager. Brad the brat. And that makes Vash’s bout of hating his plantness immediately less dire. I love Doc. (I wanted to write like, but my hands wrote love, so love it is.)

Wolfwood can never eat in peace part two electric boogaloo. He looks so cute, squatting down and just eating XD. It is one of my favourite Wolfwood panels. He just looks so innocent and curious. Annnnd… the softness is immediately gone with his scowl returning. Interesting, how Wolfwood takes the police/army force intervening as something that can go either way and not something purely positive. We don’t see much of them in the manga anyway, so how much power do they truly have? Not enough, considering Knives is scheming in the background with the whole of the gun-ho-guns.

Also, Brad, just go away with your prejudice. I’d like to see how you would have come out living not in a safe space but a world in which you can be shot just for looking stupid.

Kinda hypocritical of Wolfwood. He wants to go away and not interfere. While that is a choice, it is a passive one. His action is nonaction. But nonaction is also an action. He wants to avoid having to make this decision of life and death. But that also tells us, the readers, that while Wolfwood is capable of doing so, he hates taking a life, he hates this part of life and himself.

And his decision is to decide which conflict he interferes with, because his main goal is to keep the orphanage afloat. Wolfwood has to decide for himself who is worth saving and who is not. No wonder he calls himself a demon. But it is also very human.

He does not have the capacity to help everyone and if he dies here, the orphanage would suffer. His life is worth something for that very cause. While Wolfwood is right that you cannot not make a choice, he doesn’t seem to completely understand it, either. Surely, he breaks the choice down to kill or let live, but there are myriads of other choices that have to be decided before it comes to this. His choice right here is not to kill or to kill, but avoid interfering so he does not risk his own life at the detriment of the orphanage.

And Vash is… Not understanding Wolfwood or humanity. From Vash’s perspective every life is important. He cannot fathom that for some people some lives are more important than others and that alienates him from humanity. From his position it seems unimaginable for him that he does not jump into the fray to rescue the hostages. And it reads a bit patronising or judgemental that other people are unable to do so. It reads like: I can do it, why can't you? Wolfwood has a point, but Vash slaps it away by telling him it is just talk. Vash is not human here, he is far from it.

For me, this also opens up another question. Is Vash using this unconsciously to avoid Knives? By concentrating on helping the locals, he gets distracted again and again from their real goal, smoking out Knives. While Vash said that he wants to kill Knives, it goes against his ideals. Rem also died for Knives, not only humanity. And Vash still loves him, even though Knives did something unmentionable to him. Considering that Vash is also latently suicidal… is there an unconscious hope that he could die before having to meet Knives? It also makes his position of I can do it, why can't humanity do it, kinda sad. He can't imagine people wanting to live and considering staying alive a priority.

I… just love this very interaction. It feels a bit jarring that they had such an intense argument just a page ago and now they are back to silly nillies.

Chapter 05: Dancing revolvers

Hehehehe, Baby Vash immediately wanting to eat the geranium. Geraniums are also used to repel mosquitos. How does Zazie feel about them? Do the plants smell of geraniums? Imagine Zazie meeting Knives and having to retch.

Interestingly, I mostly found geranium meaning protection and warding off evil, even as a promise to meet at a specific place. Only after a deeper search did I find the meaning of determination. Rem’s face in that scene. She takes strength from that meaning, her own determination to leave behind something or start anew. The woman has a deeply seated regret or two.

We learn later what this exactly means, but Luraude not losing a drop of sweat… HINTS! It looks like he was controlled somehow.

Vash, that can kill a person… A pacifist, you are…

Then why are you bleeding from the mouth?!

I love the framing of Vash’s shooting scene and the aftermath. How his training comes to fruition and how much of his fighting is like high level mathematics. We also don’t know why the storage is shown in the aftermath until we get the resolution of them having been shot open.

Chapter 06: Sin

I love that framing. It shows the sin and the grief that follows it. It doesn’t show the act, it shows the victims! That makes it much more poignant for me. It is about how innocent people are forced into such situations, how much loss there is from ONE wrong act.

And while it makes a full circle back to Wolfwood’s words and gives them much needed human context, it also opens up the idea of Wolfwood being a victim that had to take up arms, too. His expression is also important. There is no: “Gotcha! Spikey! There is not his angry stubbornness or this neutral, stoic facade that normally accompanies him trying to make Vash understand. It is just absolute sadness and, maybe (I am really bad with faces) apathy by helplessness. I like that we get a callback to the scene a few chapters beforehand, because this close up tells us a whole different story and frames Wolfwood’s position much more as a position made by need and not by want. As much as Vash cried in that scene, Wolfwood looks like someone who wants to cry, too, but has no tears left.

Wolfwood says that Vash is foolish and stubborn. He looks kinda like a devil, enjoying Vash’s plightful situation. Could it be misguided care for Vash’s survival, because Wolfwood himself had to learn the hard way how to survive? Or does he want confirmation that Vash is someone who reacts and thus is in the end human? There is the hint that there is more to Wolfwood joining Vash’s travels. Our man is sus.

There are other questions that I have as a reader. How often does Vash regret the outcome of these situations? Does he only regret those where he couldn’t save everyone? Or in which people choose to be greedy? How does he keep up his hope towards humanity after those situations? Every life is holy for him, so the life of the murderer and the life of the daughter has to be on the same level. Doesn’t how we fill our life’s make a difference? Vash needs to say no to this due to all encompassing love for humanity. And that makes him inhuman.

I love how the panelling kinda says two completely different things. By lowering his gun, Vash takes a step back and lets the father decide how to punish his daughter’s murderer. Framing Knives in the middle could be read as Vash’s own acceptance of his hypocrisy. If he is willing to kill Knives for what he did, why should he stop the father. But it also shows Vash’s inner fight for me. He lowers the gun, while we are presented with Knives’s portrait. Vash is unsure if he even can kill Knives.

You can’t save everyone, but you should at least try. And Vash acts upon it. Not putting the father in danger by using his gun, but by trying to save the rapist with only his hands. It is about not burdening the father with being a killer. And… it is an end that makes Vash keep up his promise, but it also feels hollow. The girl was tortured to death and her killer lives. It is unfair. The father’s grief won’t lessen, he may even feel like a failure. And everything about this is just sad.

Another point for Vash being decidedly inhuman and separated from humanity. How would I feel if I saw my family that I put under my protection tear themselves apart. I look down from far above and their scuffles would seem so menial to me and I still lose family members to it, other grief and take more lives in revenge. But also, if everyone is your family, no one is. Family is that important because it is our in-group. But an in-group automatically has an out-group. Vash is ripping himself apart with his point of view.

Yeah, I would also yawn if my boo bombs up my holding cell and gets me with his cool bike. As if Vash expected Wolfwood to come to his rescue.

I like this little tidbit of Wolfwood showing empathy to the father and offering him an escape. Our boy is a softie! Even though he immediately grows defensive when Vash calls him out on it.

I also like Wolfwood stressing to Vash that Vash’s luck will someday run out. And Vash knows it. Vash knows he has been lucky til now. Wolfwood means it in a Vash’s life or the other person’s. Wolfwood wants Vash to chose his own life.

Annnnd Luraude was a puppet and no one knew. Even Vash with his supersenses didn’t sniff or hear him out.

And I lov…hate… love… Legato. I mean, it is a planet full of bdsm-gear-wearing cowboys shooting each other up and he walks up like from a HIM concert all in a fucking iron maiden. Damn.

#trigunbookblub #trigun bookclub #Trigun Maximum 1.2 #finally done with this #the heat fries my brain #why do I waffle so much?

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polaristhngs · 2 years

Text

Fearless (13/x)

Pairing: Dodge Mason x Female OC

Summary: Dodge wasn't gonna lose Josie too. He promised himself he wasn't gonna let Panic destroy their relationship as the game took a personal toll on him. Past and present collide in the unexpected exposure of the player’s motivations.

Warnings: Minor Explicit Language, Violence, Mentions of Substance Abuse

Word Count: 6.9k

Disclaimer

I do not own the series of Panic or the characters. This is a slight AU of Season 1.

Masterlist || I. PANIC || XII. TENSE

XIII. RETURNS

"Wanna tell me what happened?" Sheriff Cortez probes her chiefly.

Sitting nervously in a chair at the sheriff's department across Cortez, Josie starts to recall the events of last night. From Ray jumping on Bishop and Heather, to Josie jumping in to defend them, to Luke hitting her, to Dodge jumping in to defend her, and Luke choking Dodge.

"So all of that happened in a span of an hour?"

"Luke was beating and choking the life out of him. He could've died." She crossed her arms, defensively. "I wasn't gonna sit back and watch him do that."

She froze in fear. She still got goosebumps remembering Dodge's state. His wheezing and coughing blood as Luke continued to strangle him. How his brown-blue eyes suddenly turned red and his skin turned pale white almost losing all its life. Even remembering what Dodge failed to tell her, she would've never imagined losing him like that. Even if she was against his idea of revenge, part of her impulse realized she might do the same for him or anyone else.

"Witnesses say that you pulled a gun on his head." He reads off the report.

"I-It was a rock." Josie lies under her breath. "A rock?" He raised his brow. She tried to nod calmly. "It was pretty dark. Maybe they didn't see it right."

Taking off his hat, Cortez loudly sighs as he scratches his middle-aged hair. "I did warn Dodge not to get distracted. Must've been why Luke Hall got the jump on him." He pinched the bridge of his nose. His stare studied narrowly towards Josie like she did something wrong. "But that's fine, I guess. Because he did it to save you."

She didn't know how to react to Cortez complementing Dodge's heroic, but impulsive, action. He wanted to be proud but the bitter smile he wiped across his face contrastingly told otherwise.

"Why are you only dealing with me?" Josie huffed, upset. "What about Luke? Won't you talk to him?"

"I'll deal with him later. Don't worry about that."

"So how is Dodge? Is he- is he doing alright?" He rests his elbow on the table, leaning and in the thought of the Mason boy's condition.

"I don't know." Josie looks down at her fidgeting fingers.

The cops Bishop called came to the scene a few minutes later. Most of the teenagers in the drive-in dispersed after the cops arrived except for the group who only wandered cautiously as they took a look at Dodge's wounds and escorted them home. That was the last time Josie had seen Dodge. She took the ride home with the nice police lady who told her she needed to visit the department in the morning.

Josie spent the whole night staring dazed at the ceiling of her bedroom and melancholically shifting her gaze to the spot beside her that felt so empty without him. Neither bothered to call the other. Maybe it was the jitters of what just happened. Maybe it was also avoiding talking to each other because they knew they'd have to talk about what Dodge said eventually.

"I haven't seen him." Her throat felt dry saying it. She bites her lower lip, trying to hold back emotions.

"Maybe that's for the best if you know what's good for you. Wanna keep some distance from each other just to be safe."

"What are you saying, sheriff?" She questioned the man who pretentiously sunk into his desk chair.

"He's been here a year. No trouble. No bruises. He's been keeping his head down. Now, he's getting into fights. Whatever's going on between you and your friends-"

"Luke Hall is not my friend."

"Well- whatever's going on, I don't want Dodge to get involved in it. I'm not saying it's your fault but I'm just trying to look out for him. Y'know, he's like a son to me." The man surmised. "I wouldn't want to put him in harm's way as much as you do."

His words felt like a shove to an edge of a cliff. He said he didn't blame her but his expression sure did so. His scowl covered up behind ailed looks made her stomach pit in misery and discomfort. Another feeling of it being her fault. With his odd closeness with the Mason family, Josie believed that she was dragging him down with her.

"Can I go now?" She impatiently says.

"Yes. Yeah, sure."

The girl immediately stood up and stomped towards the door, departing the space of Cortez's desk before he called out her name once more. "Josie..." Her steps stopped, turning back around. "If there's any problem, be sure to go to me. Alright."

"I'll keep that in mind, sheriff." She faked a smile.

As the teenage girl left the room, irateness transformed his face. Frustratingly running his palm across his face in a disgruntled slouch on his swirling chair. He nearly slammed his hand on the table after hearing what Luke did to the boy. Luke wasn't gonna mess up his boy, not when he's so close to winning it for them. Cortez wasn't gonna let Dodge make the same mistake his son, Jimmy, did. He wasn't gonna let him throw away the game and the money just for some silly young love the boy would probably forget either way. The Mason boy wasn't gonna drop now. Not when they're so close. ----

Trudging through her workplace as she rashly classifies history novels, bewilderment struck her. Ms. Nina continued to ask her what was bothering her but continued to fail to express the reason. There were times she would love the sound of her being right but this time, she wanted Dodge to prove her wrong. When pieces started to fit into her mind, all she wanted was Dodge to tell her otherwise and that her thinking was getting the best of her.

She felt mad. She felt crossed. She felt-

"I thought I might find you here."

Turning around, she found the Mason boy standing conservatively near the double glass doors with his hands in his pockets. She missed him but she didn't want to see him. Josie tried to avoid him by going further to the bookshelves, drowning herself in tasks.

"Josie," Dodge calls out, following her. "Josie." She ignores him again. "Josie!" He pitched his voice.

"Shhh." The girl shushes him, a finger on her lips, and her eyes enlarged. "Keep quiet!"

Just before she could run away and ignore him again, he clutches her arm desperately. "I need to talk to you, Jo."

"But I don't want to."

"Josie, please just listen-"

"Why couldn't you just tell me?" She slumped.

She thought for a while that Dodge wasn't telling her something. And the whole time, she convinced herself that it wasn't a big deal. Josie would make excuses that would ease her mind. She'd say that if it's something, he'd tell her because he trusts her. She leaped and decided to take a chance, but the person she thought would be the last one to withhold something from her proved her wrong.

"A part of me wanted to tell you the truth about this whole thing, but that also meant putting you in harm's way so I didn't. I wasn't gonna drag you into this. That's why I told Cortez that-"

"So Cortez knows too." She wanted to laugh out of frustration. "He's in on this?!"

"SHHH." Her slightly raised tone received a pausing shush from an older man across from them.

"Cortez's been helping us from the get-go. He's been trying to bring charges against Luke to the D.A. for some time."

"And you trust him?"

He doesn't, Dodge answered. But Cortez was the only one who helped them with Dayna's case and who told them it was Luke. He's been a big help to them for months. Under the circumstances, Dodge had to trust him. It was the only way to get Luke to jail.

"Heather knows people are gambling on Panic. We also found out that Luke is part of it too. We think Luke might be in charge." Josie informs.

She felt like punching his unfazed expression. Humming in response and setting his sights on the soles of his shoes or the interesting contents of the floor. Josie laughs ironically.

"You're not surprised." She says, biting the inside of her cheek spitefully. "Because you already knew, didn't you?" Josie felt like an idiot.

"Cortez suspected ever since he found out about Panic, but he didn't know enough about the game or how it worked in order to build a case. So he needed a way in." The boy spoiled, not being able to meet her eyes.

"So you've been helping him too. Were you spying on us the whole time? How about the cops during the game, did you guys plan that too?" She couldn't help but accuse and speculate at the moment. Arms crossed, she narrowly gazed at the boy as her skin boils.

"Even when I'm working with Cortez, I'm still in the dark about the game just like all of you."

"But that's the thing. You're not playing to win. You're playing for revenge."

"That's winning for me."

"It's not illegal to gamble in Texas. But it is a felony to be the house. That's how we're going to catch him. If I win, we can prove that Luke is getting a kickback as the bookie. That's what Cortez needs."

"This is the only way," Dodge said.

"So it's really been all a game for you."

"I-" He ran out of breath. "I've been trying to win."

She couldn't recognize him. The boy who she believed that she knew to her core felt unfamiliar now. His eyes were now filled with rage and misery. His shoulders carry the weights he's been drowning with. It hurts to look at him.

The Mason boy's phone lit up in notification. A message from Panic sparks up stating: TUMBLEWEED HOLLOW, 10 P.M.

Both knew what it meant.

"Guess you have to go." Josie exhales in exhaustion and sadness.

"Good luck, Dodge Mason. I really hope you win this one." She stuttered. Immediately walking away, swallowing the emotions bottling up in her chest and now evident in her eyes.

Dodge was scared of telling her. He knew she'd react this way. But he didn't anticipate how much it hurt happening in reality. He anticipated that she would turn away from him. Maybe that was a good thing. She doesn't have to be in harm's way and he wouldn't lose her any more than he already did. He lost people that he cared about. He almost lost Dayna. And for that split second Luke Hall smeared his hand across Josie's face, an instinct rose into Dodge, screaming that he wasn't gonna let Luke take her away from him. Dodge wasn't gonna lose Josie too. He promised himself he wasn't gonna let Panic destroy their relationship. But it didn't. He did.

Giving her one final look, he solemnly took his steps towards the exit and left.

Josie buried her head in the novels and books piled up in front of her. Wiping the sniffs off her nose, distracting herself through work. Ms. Nina trolled up beside her, pulling the girl into conversation after seeing her hunched shoulders.

"Was that your boyfriend? He seems like a sweet boy." The woman jilts her chin, a sly grin on her face.

"You never even met him."

"What happened to his face?" She asks, observing the cut on the boy's lip and the blue-purple bruise atop his right eye. Josie had her lips pulled into a straight line. "He got into a fight 'cause an asshole shoved me. They both started punching and things just went out of hand. Dodge really shouldn't have. It was my fault anyway."

"I doubt he thinks that, Josie." The Slater girl felt comfort in the gentle squeeze toward her hand. Ms. Nina always had an aspect for saying the right things to reassure people. "Only love makes you that crazy, hon. And that damn stupid."

"He does do a lot of stupid things." She releases a chuckle.

"He's been keeping this secret from me and I don't know I just got mad."

"Why?"

"Because it's not the first time people don't tell me the truth just to spare me from getting hurt. They think they're protecting me or saving me, but it really just makes things worse." Josie bemoaned.

"Nothing feels real anymore."

Josie wasn't delicate. She was defensive.

It wasn't the first time someone lied to her, hid things from her, or only told her half-truths. Truth be told, she got used to it. Her mother used to have this habit of telling her she'll be gone for an hour but in reality, it's code for goodbye forever. She'd wander around the front door, waiting for her to come back any second. And those seconds turn into years. Josie just never really expected it from him. The guy who dared her to break her walls of trust issues and take a risk. Perhaps she was scared that she wouldn't notice the half-truths and lies in the future. As the world keeps changing, maybe just like her mother, he'll leave her all of the sudden. ----

The Slater girl drove rushingly with a fueled temper in her brain to Ray Hall's place after receiving a threatening text from an unknown number which she can only assume to be Luke. After finishing her work for the day, her phone vibrated in her pocket as she walked along the streets of the town. She looked around warily as if someone was watching her.

"HEY!"

Josie screams aloud, grabbing the attention of the younger Hall fixing up scraps laid out in front of their porch. Ray's expression grew baffled as he turned around seeing the girl carelessly parking her car and stomping her way toward him furiously. The next thing he knew, she grabbed the rusty metal fences he was carrying and threw them away on the ground.

"Tell Luke to stop whatever shit he's playing!"

"What are you talking about?"

"If he thinks he can scare me to back out of Panic, he has a bullet coming in his head."

His once boring mood changed into an active one. The sound of her threat whispered alarms in his head. Moving defensively near the space, he raised his tone. "What the fuck are you talking about, Josie?" Ray questioned. Fishing the phone out of her pocket, she showed him the message that only sparked confusion in the boy.

THE BETS ARE IN. THE GAME IS ON.

QUIT NOW, IF YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOOD FOR YOU.

"I don't know what the hell this is." He tossed the phone back to her.

"Oh please." Josie scoffs. "I know what you and Luke are up to."

"I know Luke's running bets on Panic and you're in on it. Fixing the game like your brother did last year."

"If I was fixing the game, I'd be winning," Ray yelled out, both smugly and rationally. If he wanted to fix the game, he would've made himself the winner from the beginning. He wouldn't need to go through lengths just to get to the next round.

"Y'know someone's gonna come down on Luke for what he did to Dodge's sister." She heaved, treading intimidatingly towards him. "Tell me something, what kind of animal leaves a girl on the road like that."

"What do you mean Dodge's sister?" His face paled in confusion.

"She's gonna be in a wheelchair for the rest of her life, Ray. But I guess that's just the whole family way. Leave a girl on the road to die." Josie shrugs.

"You think your family's so perfect?" Ray snorts. "Your mom was a junkie. And the only reason you started hanging out with Tyler and me was 'cause she needed some more." Josie froze on the spot after hearing him utter the mention of her mother.

She felt ashamed looking back at her desperate attempt to get together with Ray just because he was Tyler's friend and, even if she loathed to admit it, she liked him. Her mom was addicted and she seemed to only make it worse. Josie would also smuggle some for herself.

"That's the difference between you and me. I don't try to lie away the worst parts of myself." She gulped as Ray looked her straight in the eye. "One of us makes it all the way to the finish line and the other one fucking chokes."

"You know what your problem is?" She exhaled with a sharp tinge on her face. "You could be walking with a blindfold on, staring at the pictures that are going on in your head. And you'd be convinced that your eyes were wide fucking open. You gotta know what to be afraid of. When to be afraid of it. And you gotta know the difference. Every decision is dangerous when you're wearing a blindfold."

"Come clean about what Luke is doing and maybe Cortez won't come down on you too."

"Did it ever bother you that this whole thing is a complete cliche?" The boy muttered exhaustingly as he sat on the steps of the porch.

"Fine, go to jail with him. I don't fucking care. Be my guest."

Josie turns around heading for her car, not wasting more sweat on the guy who wouldn't listen to her. If he wants to be stubborn, then so be it. She had nothing to lose on that. Before unlocking the car door, he stops her.

"Dodge? H-How is he?" Ray asks.

"Breathing."

"How are you?"

"I'm good." She plainly says, getting in the car and turning on the ignition. Josie couldn't help but feel slightly awed at Ray's concern.

"You're seriously gonna drag yourself into this, Josie?"

"I just want things to be fair." She says. "Tell your brother to stop messing with me or he's gonna get another thing coming." The dark-haired girl warns before driving off.

Ray rested his arms on top of his head as he looked up at the sky feeling torn. Many emotions are running into him right now. Mixed of astonished and betrayed at another fucked up thing Luke did. His brother was an asshole who did stupid shit, Ray admits that. But it still shocks him that things like these continue to surprise him and that some part of him still wants to defend the only family he had left. ----

Dodge surveyed his sights as he pulled up on an almost abandoned ranch with dark twigs and cut-down trees atop and below the wooden houses. Probably doesn't seem abandoned under the daylight. He deeply exhales, cracking his knuckles, frantically running his hand across his face, minding the bruise under his eye. If there is anything he's not in the mood for, it's this. Dodge has been stressing about his individual challenge for weeks and now it's here on impeccably terrible timing. After Cortez found out somehow, he chastised him to keep his head in the game. That this was his only chance.

Shutting the engine off, he spots Summer sitting seriously on the edge of the wooden steps, bowing her cowboy-hat-filled head intricately while waiting for him to show up.

"Howdy, stranger." She stood and greets.

"You're the welcoming committee?"

"At least you don't have to pay for admission." She quips.

Dodge heeded right behind her as she went deeper into the place. He studied the almost unending space of the ranch. The tall boy wanted to roll his eyes. The setting is quite elaborate for an individual challenge. Probably because, unlike everybody else, they had nothing on him. Psychological or emotional torture wouldn't work on him.

Stopping in front of a sign, he reads.

"Tumbleweed Maze?" Dodge chucked. "I'm almost offended."

"The judges...they're looking for a specific key. You have one hour. Find it and you're in." Summer advised. "And keep it moving, because every minute you spend looking, that's just another point you won't get."

"In three, two, one."

Unenthusiastically at first, the Mason boy quickened his steps forward going into the maze. As soon as he left, Summer couldn't cover the grin on her face anymore. He had no idea what was coming.

Unfazed, he trailed across poorly structured wooden boundaries they'd call a maze. Some walls broke. Some intact. The dimly lit lanterns kept his vision from going sore. From the corner of his eye, he could spot some crap and trash on the ground. The smell was inevitable and the insects trilling in the background were the only ones keeping him company. He followed surely and undoubtedly. Left, right, left, right, right, left, and another left. Dodge got out of that maze easily. But he didn't walk confidently. That wasn't the challenge yet.

Exiting the maze, his eyes grew partly wider seeing a bigger setting right in front of him. The wooden houses seemed endless. There was fog coming out of the corner. The world was lit dark so he didn't know if his sights were betraying him.

Dodge kept his direction straight. If he squinted his eyes, he could see the shining silhouette peering from the barn door opening from across the ranch. Immediately sprinting towards there, he didn't want to waste any more time and wanted to get this over with.

"Shit." He muttered.

Opening the wooden doors, he nearly stumbled backward. His mind got busy and his judgment was tested seeing a thousand or maybe millions of keys hanging from the ceiling with a thread. At every step, he saw different-looking ones scattered all over the floor of the empty barn.

Walking closer to the middle, he sharply exhaled in annoyance at the twisted humor of the judges they liked to call a game.

"Hello? Is someone there?"

Dodge froze as his eyes grew wide. His breath hitched in dread as he recognized that voice. He heard that sound every day for nineteen years of his life. The one who would tell him bedtime stories and calm him down in the middle of a storm. The voice that sang to him lullabies and lulls him to distraction whenever their parents would argue like crazy. The voice that dreaded him to shreds in that haunting night. No...It couldn't be.

"Dayna?"

"Oh, god. Please help me!" She shrilled, pleading.

"Dayna!" He crouched down to the small wooden door, knocking. "Dayna, are you in there? Can you hear me?!"

"They know about our plan!" She screamed.

"D-Dayna, it's Dodge, can you hear me?" Each word grew louder and alerted. He kept knocking on the wood, asking for a sign or a response. He taps the floorboard frantically. Grabbing and hauling the tightly latched padlock to set her free but it wouldn't budge.

"They put me down here!"

"Just be calm, okay? I'm-I'm right here." The panic in his voice echoed in the void. "I'm g-gonna, um-"

Dodge rose up to his feet hectically, nearly staggering his steps as he looked high and low for the key that would unlock the latch. At every decision, he felt unsure. At every key he set his eye on, a voice in the back of his head told him it was wrong. Dayna's frantic screams and call for help made him question everything. All he wanted to do was cover his ears, close his eyes, and ask the world to stop.

"Fuck. Fuck." He mumbles under his breath, wiping the drop of sweat dripping from his forehead. The Mason boy grabbed every single key he believed could open the trap. The metallic clinking sound echoes the room as he snatched each one. Yanking them out from the strings tied to the ceiling. Plucking them out from the ground.

He was on his knees again, using every key possible if he had to if it meant freeing his sister. "I'm gonna get you out of here, okay?" He tried reassuring her as his hands shook in anxiety. "Dayna, k-keep talking to me. Dayna, can you hear me?!" He cried out. Dodge clamored out for help from Summer, but there was no answer. He groaned in frustration, nothing seemed to work.

"Hey, this isn't funny!" He yelled aloud.

"Dayna!" Dodge screamed desperately. Red flushed in his face while his hands turned dark. Fumes grew under his nose. His heart went rapidly, battering the door again and again. Slamming his marked fists against the wood, trying to break it open if he has to. The dead silence of Dayna gave him flashbacks of the past that left him with a burning, unbearable intensity on his chest. "Fuck!"

He continued to call out to her. Now, wretchedly and defeatedly slam his foot on the wood board. Every crashing step was a desperate cry for help. Fear and panic pierced through him like a bullet. Terrible thoughts flowed through his mind just like the night of her accident. What if she doesn't make it? What if he loses her? It was his fault all over again. If only they didn't fight, maybe she wouldn't have gone off on her own that night.

Pulling the lock once more, he moved quickly as it itched, finally breaking free. Dodge opened the wooden door but just before he could sprint towards his sister, his steps halted. His mind rendered confused as his chest rose up and down, exhausted. There was no basement. No room underneath. No cage or trap, like he reckoned. It was empty. Nothing but the key hung over the small voice speaker that played Dayna's voice. She screams and pleads on repeat. Bending down, Dodge grabbed the speaker, still staring unbelievably at it as he stood. Still listening as Dayna spoke once more. He laughed. He stood there laughing. His laugh of anger grew louder and unhinged as he threw the speaker severely on the wall, smashing it into pieces.

Dodge clenched the key, which seemed to be mocking him as he looked at it, in his red blood-boiled fists. He nearly blasted the barn door shut as he exited. Nothing else filled his senses as he sauntered back to the entrance of the Tumbleweed Maze. Dodge tossed the key towards Summer who was standing carelessly near the sign waiting for him.

She checks over the timer on her phone. "That took a little longer than I expected. But congratulations. You're still on the running." Summer smirked.

"You know I gotta tell you, Summer, you got me there." The Mason boy infuriatingly chuckles. His lips released an outright grin but his gaze narrowed sharply against the girl. "Is this some fucking joke to you?"

"Don't blame the messenger, man. The judges orchestrate the whole thing."

Dodge flexed his hand, open and close. Trying to control his temper and the bullshit utterance of the judges of Panic. His shoulders rose up and down, thinking about how they got him. They got him so well, that Dodge wanted to punch himself in the gut. Them has the nerve to mess him through the important person in his life. They played with him well.

"Well, you can tell the judges to fuck off." ----

Heather strolled inside the regular young adult bar they used to dread going to when they were in high school with her head wandering contradictorily on the clouds. She didn't know why she had to be there. The place was empty and quiet but the lights still detected it open. It has Panic written all over it, what else would it be? Only the unknown message sent to her number gave her a reason to. All it said was MOTOR LODGE, 10 P.M. No more follow-up texts. No clues. Nothing but a location and a time dictated her plans for the night.

"Diggins?"

The only response to Heather's call was silence.

The brunette trudged softly. As she loomed closer to the blackboard, her brows crinkled in puzzlement reading the letters posted.

SPECIAL SCREENING TONIGHT IN THE BAR

FEATURING NATALIE WILLIAMS

INDIVIDUAL CHALLENGE

What was she doing there if it was an individual challenge? Was she part of it? Or was it some silly local prank other teens were playing on them? Heather wandered dubiously inside the establishment, surveying the unfilled and gloomy room. She lost her luck in trying to turn the lights on. Shifting her attention, Heather dragged her feet in front of the working television with a Panic symbol plastered on it.

"Swear to God, my dude, if you put porn on that screen, I'll kill you." She says to the heedful ghost watching her from afar. It was Panic. Someone was always watching.

She rested her palm on the table, waiting for the show or whatever it is they had planned for tonight. Still wondering about her purpose for being there. A need for an audience?

"Hello?"

The girl whips her body around. Her nose let out a calm exhale. Her shoulders faltered down in relaxation after seeing Natalie's familiar face walking toward her after spotting her.

"Heather." Natalie's voice went low.

The last time they spoke was when Natalie told her to back out of Panic. Both girls had fights but they always managed to get past it at the end of the day. They haven't spoken to each other since so that's why their interaction felt so awkward. Neither could meet the eyes of each other while speaking.

"What are you doing here?" Natalie asked.

"Umm...urgent summons."

"But you're not playing." Heather didn't know if it was a genuinely confused reaction or a reminder.

"I think I got invited to your individual challenge."

A jutting noise was heard from the corner of the room. Both girls squinted, awaiting for the dark figure to emerge from the shadows.

"Josie?" Natalie said, confused. The dark-haired awkwardly stepped into the room, skittishly waving at the girls. "Sup."

"What are we doing here?"

"What are you doing here?"

"A text told me to come here."

Josie's forehead creased seeing the setup television screen. "Alright seriously, if they're gonna make us watch porn or some weird snuff film, fuck it, I'm leaving."

"Are we just gonna, like, talk through your favorite movie or something? What'd your invitation say?"

"It didn't." Natalie sighed. "I just got a start time, some friendship necklace thing, and- Damn."

Just then, the grey television screen turned on. Heather and Josie's eyes went large at the screen flashing a scene of Natalie in a blindfold answering questions on the hanging train tracks while being filmed by Summer and Diggins.

"I should've brought popcorn." The brunette smiled.

"Wait a second. They were filming us?" Josie asked.

"Score! Are we gonna watch your video next, Josie?"

Natalie looked stunned, frozen in her spot with a hardened expression differing from the girls' astonished one.

"Turn it off."

"Okay, admittedly, it's not your best look."

"Turn it off." She said, "Turn it off." She repeated. Natalie dashes near the screen, searching for a remote, a cable box, a wire, an off button, anything. No. No, please.

"Nat, what's wrong?"

She turned around to the bewildered girls, tears nearly forming in her. Palpitations reached her chest and wavered her breathing. Her shoulders shook in panic and anticipation of what they were about to see as the video continued to play in the background for them to watch.

"Dodge and I made a deal. We're gonna split the money if either of us wins. Dodge probably told Josie already because he has a thing for her, but Heather doesn't know." Natalie admitted. Heather was quiet and focused.

"Because she'd be angry?" They recognized Diggins's voice in question.

"Because Heather, Josie, and I made a deal first."

"So you lied to Heather?"

"She lied to me. Besides... I don't care how many points she got at Jump. There's no way she's gonna win. She never finishes her stories. She never even applied to college. As soon as she has a chance of actually getting what she wants, she just quits."

Shifting her focused stare from the screen to her, Heather is shocked. Her mouth hung open hearing more of Natalie's words. "What am I watching?"

"Please just let me explain." Josie watched Natalie tremble at her spot. Desperation flowed down her face.

"This isn't real 'cause you wouldn't say those things about me, right Nat?"

Heather didn't know what to say. Her tiny bubble of hope that none of this was true and was just a trick of Panic was about to pop as she continued to watch. She stood there, hands crossed to her chest, shielding herself as she listened to Nat admit she sabotaged her by trapping her in the basement at Spurlock's ranch. The girl's eyes watered, heartbroken, hearing her best friend say that no one can stop 'cause no one has to. Heather wasn't a competitor. All she got was just sheer dumb luck.

"You seem to spend most of your time sabotaging Heather," Diggins spoke offscreen. "What about Josie? Why bother making a deal with her in the first place?"

Josie held her breath as her name was mentioned. Natalie's teary eyes moved to hers and all Josie thought was that she didn't know what to feel for her.

"Honestly, I'm surprised she even made it this far. I don't even know why she joined Panic in the first place. Maybe it's her last attempt to feel something that doesn't require pills. After she got clean, she got boring. But it didn't make her less useful. Josie can keep trying to make it to the final but she'll crack in the end like she always does. She always chooses to run away when things get tough. She's a coward."

"Stop it, we get it! Stop it! Stop, ok. We get it. Stop!" Natalie pleaded. Running a hand through her forehead, her breathing went rapid. She wanted to run to them. Hug them, apologize, anything that she could do to earn their forgiveness but she knew it was too late.

"Guys, please I -"

"Nice to know what you really think of me, Nat."

Josie could feel Heather's sorry eyes glancing at her from her side. The Slater girl didn't know what to do and just shifted her gaze down, sniffing and wiping the water falling from her eyes. Natalie's words felt like bullets and nails piercing through her skin. Like what basically people expected her to do, she ran out. Dashing her feet out of the bar, out of the door, and ran to her car. On her way out, she spotted Diggins watching in the corner of her eye. She felt Natalie running after her before being stopped by Diggins. What did you do, Josie overheard Natalie say.

As she drove far enough, she turned the car off. Her whole body shook in tears as her mind continued to replay Natalie's video. Her brain went as far as going back to her earlier conversation with Ray. Maybe she was lying to herself. She could try to change but it's useless. Like what Dodge said, she was acting like her mother. Something she feared and dreaded happening.

-----

As the ignition went down low, Josie sat inside the parked car blatantly staring into space consumed with her own thoughts. She buried her head into her hands, exhaling slowly. She had a long day. All she was eager to do was sink into her bed. Drown herself into the blankets and pillows or read a book if she can't do that. She tried to distract herself by reminding herself once more that she needed to clean her room. Giving herself the effort to get out of the car and walk through the porch, she beamed for a moment, peering through the curtains and seeing the house lights on. Josie couldn't wait to talk to Nick about the day she had. Walking through the porch, she hurriedly pushed the front door open, not knowing what was waiting for her.

"Hey!" Josie tried to add some light to her voice. "Nick, are you home?" She searches the living room before seeing him seated at the kitchen table.

"Anyways, are we gonna order in tonight 'cause I don't really feel like cooking-"

Josie stopped speaking immediately and fixed her gaze on the familiar person sitting across from her brother. A face she prayed she would never see once more. A face she wants to forget. The person who has hurt her the most throughout the years. The woman abandoned her family in the middle of an unfamiliar place after their father passed away.

"What is she doing here?" Josie asks Nick. Not even sparing a glance at her mother. "I said, what the fuck is SHE doing here, Nick?!" She yelled. Nick heaved a sigh at his sister's unsurprising reaction.

Josie could describe their relationship as strained. It's been five years since they last saw their mother. For a while, he'd check up on their mom if he can manage to find her. The last time they ever spoke surprised him. That time, it was her who reached out to him. She sounded good. There was a feeling of optimism again that Josie would remind him to shut off.

"She came here to see us."

"You're really falling for that again. Seriously?" Josie laughingly scoffed. "Are you sure she's here to see us or do you mean the cabinet where we keep all the money?"

"Josie."

"What?" She raised out her arms. "I'm just pointing out the facts. That's what she did the last time." Josie bit the inside of her cheek. She held her breath as she could feel the tears forming in her eyes. She wasn't gonna cry in front of this woman. She promised herself that she wasn't gonna waste her tears on her anymore.

"She's sober, Josie. She's been clean. All she wants is to apologize."

"Not the first time I've heard that." She defensively crossed her arms. "All she does is lie, Nick! Why can't you see that?!"

Josie, I'm sorry. Josie, I've missed you. Josie, I'm better now. Josie, I'm right here. Those were the words she'd hear often. The apologies and the promises that meant nothing to the person saying it. Josie felt so stupid to believe such promises. It took her a long time to learn how to not fall for those tricks again. But every time she tries to open her heart, the world around her always gives her a chance to speculate.

She remembered the time when her mom called her and revisited her home in the middle of the night. Her mother was unrecognizable back then. Her clothes disheveled, the bags under her eyes were dark, her hair looked like it hadn't been washed. She saw the scars on her arms that Josie was too young to understand. But despite that, she let her in. At the crack of dawn, she left like she wasn't even there.

"I should leave."

"That was quicker than I expected. You beat your last record." She mockingly claps as her mom stood from her seat.

"I just wanted to see how the two of you are doing."

"Oh! How very nice of you to think of us." Josie derisively says. "As you can see, we're doing just fine. I would've cleaned the house but I didn't know when you would show up whenever it was convenient for you."

"You know, I think about you two all the time."

For a second there, she drifted back to her childhood. There was that sweet tone Josie recalled that talked to her, sang to her, and assured her that everything was gonna be alright. The genuineness of her expression made Josie miss her. She missed her mom. Josie fought against the idea in her mind of wanting her back.

"I think that's guilt," Josie said halfheartedly.

"I understand that you're here to make amends or whatever shitty reason you crawled back in here. But if you think we can just forgive you for putting us through hell when you left and we're going act like some big happy family, then you're fucking wrong." She stated.

"If you were any smarter…" Nick tries to get a hold of Josie's forwarding stride but she manages to escape his grip. Holding in the tears and looking her in the eye, Josie refused to blink. She wasn't gonna falter. She wasn't gonna let her hurt her again. "Never come back here again."

Not looking back, Josie stomped her way into her room. Her feet increased their pace just enough to get her out of there. The other Slaters glanced in her direction. Nick bowed his head down in disappointment as he heard his little sister slam the door shut.

Josie wanted to run. She wanted to run away. She didn't know where but all she knew was that she needed to get away from there. She paced around her room, her feet growing restless, her heart pounding loudly like soldiers marching on the ground, and her arms growing tired as it rests above her head. Josie wanted to scream. Screaming so loud that the world would just fall apart like she is. Her hands fell on her knees as her sobs filled her surroundings. She clutched her chest as she let out the mixed frustration and sadness in her system. Her breath hitches as she closed her eyes, letting the tears fall. Seeing the emptiness surrounding her, Josie allowed her body fell forward, drowning in self tears and misery.

#dodge mason #dodge mason x female oc #dodge mason x oc #dodge mason fanfic #dodge mason imagine #panic #panic 2021 #panic season 1 #panic amazon series #panic fanfic #panic imagine #mike faist #mike faist fanfic #mike faist imagine #mike faist character #fanfic #imagine #fiction #writing

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hongism · 1 year

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yall know what time it is. ITS BREAKING THE ASKBOX TIME SJJSKALALALKAKSKWLWMNSNDDJKDK

honestly i expect nothing short of a masterpiece the moment i saw the notification. YOU! DO! NOT! DISAPPOINT! EVER! MISS CALY!!!

before getting into the crazier bits of this chapter, i wanna acknowledge how much you’ve grown as a writer during this series 🥹 recently i started re-reading some of the older moc chapters, and not to say that your writing wasn’t great before in any way, but the way you write now is so much more refined and beautiful, and i guess some of that is also attributed to how intense the story line and characters have developed. seriously, i’m so grateful to be able to read something and feel just how much effort and love the author has poured into in. now i can go on and on about praising your talent but i digress for the sake of discussing more… pressing issues that goes on here :)

*SPOILER ALERT FROM THIS PART*

now that jisung, hyunwoo and even hyunjin (sadly) has reached their demise, it finally dawns on me that this really is an end of an era. we spent like the past 1 or 2 maybe even 3 acts going through a gazillion emotional roller coaster rides all caused by jisung, but now is it weird that i’m kinda sad that he’s gone? it’s a perfect ending since jisung will probably never get his redemption even if he lives, but idk, i think it’s kinda depressing how love makes you do crazy shit :/ hyunwoo, on the other hand, BYE YOU ASS LMFAO WELL DESERVED. the only thing that dude has is the fucking audacity until the very last minute.

the action scene was beyond immaculate just as the emotional ones and there’s no doubt about that. im writing this with metaphorical tear streaks down my face and a broken heart after reading the whole chapter. you’ve got a way with words that can make me feel like i’m living and breathing in this fictional world. also, can we talk about this:

“Give me what’s mine first”

“Let her go immediately, you dog, or I’ll put a bullet in your head too.”

WELL GOD DAMN SIR. i’m gonna be fr and say i was SO certain we’re finally gonna get the infamous, long-awaited scene that must not be named between captain and ghost, but that’s on for me for not taking the slow burn warning more seriously lol. BUT there is still hope, i mean our mc would not be our mc if she can resist temptations and mind her own business yk.

"All these pit stops, huh? You sure she's the one trying to save you here, Captain? Because it looks an awful lot like that's what you're trying to do to her instead."

"Nightingale"

“I'm going, I'm going!”

and THIS IS ADORABLE OMG?!/?? i swear this whole part and the next part here is a prophecy that they’re gonna get it.

Yet, what you see before you is a trap, one carefully set by a vulnerable yet volatile man who could easily turn the situation into one that is advantageous to him permanently and you briefly. You imagine he has been in this position before — one where he can take as he pleases without thinking of the consequences of his actions — and where you stand, in a vulnerable spot yourself, you feel that tug to be near someone on equal footing. Wonder persists in your mind as you question where that is how Yunho initially fell into bed with him some time ago, or even further back to the first time Seonghwa was with him.

my girl has got some resolve and dignity alright, but we’ll see how long that lasts hahasksjak. we still probably got around 100 more chapters lol but just so you know, you’re gonna have to expect more than a broken askbox when that happens. everyone here will go so insane we might accidentally report you for emotional damage /hj. this is more than enough rambling but PLEASE I CAN NOT WAIT FOR MORE YOU’RE A LITERAL GODSEND THANK YOU LOVE YOU <3 - 🌊

OMGOMG okay i’ve been trying to answer this ask for like 2-3 weeks now but tumblr kept making it disappear from my inbox i was legit losing my mind?? but god bless today... today it worked... so finally i can respond...

thank you for waiting for me so sorry tumblr was a bitch and didn't let me respond sooner </3 i was legit so sad it kept disappearing bc i wanted to answer SO BAD LSKDFJFLK thank you thank you first off in this past few days i'e received so much lvoe and compliments on my writing, and i've been told many lovely things and i know you sent this ask a while back but man it still means so much to me i'm still so grateful the words hold just as much meaning to me i really truly appreciate them and you!!!

now onto the spoiley bits... you're spot on! this is the end of an arc in its own regard where we've been in this storyline for such a long while by now that it's a bit like wow! that's over! i've been loving seeing the mixed bag of reactions about jisung, truly, the overwhelming majority are upset over his death even if he was a villain in many regards and that is super fascinating to me and frankly that was my goal i was trying to achieve! switching the perspectives of jisung vs hyunwoo, i wanted to play with that concept and i couldn't be happier with the outcome!

hongjoong and mc have such a fun dynamic and push-and-pull to play with too i adore it and i adore seeing everyone react to that as well, especially with recent chapters ofc.. but she's a strong one! she's resisting well! she's still got her resolve and her dignity both buttttt we'll see how much longer that lasts :3

#mists of celeste #moc: spoilers #🌊 anon

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random-yandere-fandom · 2 years

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Howdy, how about a yandere TC meliodas and Goddess Elizabeth with a Fairy S/O who a warrior like Elaine able to summon/control water .Maybe a scene where s/o first meets both of them, they crash landed in heaven theater injured from a fight needing rest only to come face to face with Meliodas and Elizabeth.

By the way are you reading the new sequel for SDS it really good.

Oh I wish I had the time and emotional space to read it, but you can bet it’s on my (ever growing) list.

Btw. I just made the reader a part of the alliance between goddesses, fairies, etc. Hope you’re fine with that. Hope you’re also fine with me simping for the two of them and letting that influence this writing more than I had planned.

Yandere TC Meliodas and Goddess Elizabeth with a fairy s/o

Elizabeth and Meliodas are a bit like celebrities in the alliance. I mean, one of the most powerful goddesses, the daughter of the prime diety, and her demon boyfriend, the son of the fucking demon king, are sure to garner a lot of attention. So it’s not hard to imagine your surprise when you meet them in person.

Sadly, this was not the kind of situation you would like two famous people to find you in, but alas, it can’t be helped. Picture this: the place is a formerly peaceful heaven theater and rushing over to you are Elizabeth, who simply looks stunning even with worry written all over her face, and Meliodas, who also looks quite handsome and dangerous with his eyebrows furrowed in concern. And then there is you, dirt sticking to your clothing, hair an absolute mess, blood seeping from a few injuries that you told yourself would heal with time and absolutely drenched in water. You laid in the crater that had formed upon your impact. All you can manage is a flowing motion with your hand and the water moves as you had prompted it, gathering in a puddle a bit further away. Goddesses, you could straight up die out of embarrassment and if you hadn’t finished your enemy off already you would have hoped for one final blow from it so you might at least be unconscious.

Your wishes were not heard, as you had already guessed, as the goddess kneeled by your side and let her hands hover over your form, a warm glow emanating from her palms as you felt your wounds mending. You sighed in relief at the comforting feeling and glanced at Meliodas who was standing beside her, unsure how he could help, if you even wanted the help of a demon. You smiled at him which hopefully looked reassuring as you turned your attention back to Elizabeth, missing his eyes widening for a second before smiling back warmly. Mentally preparing yourself for a short moment to speak to her you opened your mouth to thank her only for her to be faster. “Are you alright?”

What followed was a short talk as you reported your fight before thanking the two of them profusely and then being blinded as these two grinned brightly at you. Man, you definately knew why those two fell for each other, those of the same feather really flock together. They offered to help you back but you refused, your nerves were already doing overwork as you tried not to embarrass yourself any further. You said your goodbyes and were already leaving as Elizabeth shouted that she’d hope to see you again followed by agreement from Meliodas. Sharing the sentiment you finally left. It was unlikely that the three of you would meet again, even though you were a capable and rather well known warrior, there was no way that you’d ever have the opportunity to encounter them once again.

That was what you thought, you hadn’t however taken into consideration that they themselves would seek you out again. Three days had passed, which you had spend resting as fatigue had finally caught up to you. Today you finally could eat with the others again as your body had recovered fully and you were happy to do so. You sat near a group of giants, waiting for your friends to turn up as you listened to their idle chatter. Bored, you let water flow in circles in front of you, entertaining yourself by slowly creating images of butterflies. Their wings flapped and the light of the bonfire made them glow in reds and oranges. Truly, you adored the way light would hit your little projects and give the normally transparent water color.

Unaware of the two approaching figures you let the butterflies fly a bit higher, making them swarm out a bit so you could create more. You were so concentrated on them that when Meliodas finally spoke up, you shrieked and turned to him, the water falling at your lost control and drenching the pair completely. If it were enemies you now would have been able to throw their bodies around to your liking, but no, instead you had fear creeping up your spine as your face lost all color. You couldn’t stop apologizing as you rushed to command the water to leave the two powerful and influential beings in front of you, stopping as you heard their laughter.

That was the second time you had met them, and as an apology you had let them eat with you, which you couldn’t quite figure out why they asked for that. Still, the time you spent with them was surprisingly fun and relaxing. Before you knew it you had somehow befriended them, or had they befriended you? Well, it doesn’t really matter.

To have both of them as your yanderes is rather... complicated. Not only are there a lot of political issues which give you a migraine on a regular basis, but you can’t stop any of them either. Each of them alone is already powerful enough to force you to stay with them and keep you away from fighting, but with them together you have zero chances. Truly, it’d be best to give up your warrior status on you own. If you do not, Elizabeth is happy to convince you and if needed, use her power to get you to finally agree.

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notchesandbullets · 3 years

Text

The Gentle Giant's Breaking Point (Shoji x Reader)

Art credit: @tonerukun

Requested by: @/smol_angry_rabbit on wattpad

Aged-Up!AU

Warnings: explicit smut, size kink, dirty talk, hickeys, cursing, being overpowered and completely dominated, unprotected sex, creampie, multiple orgasms, tender aftercare and soft confession

Words: 6.4k

In downtown Musutafu, Shoji, Tokoyami and Ojiro were wandering around the city packed with people on a bright, sunny day. A gentle breeze blew by, swirling around the hundreds of people who decided to get some fresh air for the first time in weeks.

The second the weather warmed up, food stalls and all sorts of vendors were back on the streets. Mouthwatering scents of sesame soba, senbei and taiyaki curled deliciously into the air and wafted over to everyone within the vicinity, enticing them over to buy the scrumptious street food.

At the first sight of spring, the students of UA scattered, all eager to spend their off day outside.

Kaminari, Bakugou, Kirishima and Ashido all went to the pool, the rest of Class 1-A following in a slow trickle.

It first was Hagakure who wanted to tag along, then Uraraka, then reluctantly Jirou followed by the rest of the girls.

Midoriya sheepishly asked if he could come along too, Todoroki following suit since he'd rather be anywhere than at an empty dorm and end up having to go home to his father.

Mineta was only allowed to come with Sero's tape restricting his hands and covering his eyes. He complained the whole way there that it was unfair but no one paid any attention to him.

Shoji let his arms fall to his sides as he strolled around downtown, following Tokoyami.

He hadn't particularly wanted to go anywhere, preferring to stay in the dorms. He didn't know when was the last time where it had actually been quiet. Not since before they moved in.

He didn't really have any complaints about his classmates. If anything, he was rather happy to live in a dormitory. It meant he got to see a lot more of you.

You were best friends with him, preferring to keep to yourself most of the time, just like him.

Maybe that's why you got along so well.

Shoji never tried to bother you but it was inevitable when the last class of the day would be dismissed and everyone paired off or huddled up in their groups to talk about anything and everything. He would just be at his desk, pulling out a book or getting started on his homework so he didn't have to worry about it later and you would come over, plop yourself down in the empty desk next to him and start reading a book without a word.

He didn't mind. He rather liked your company. It was quiet. It was nice.

He was going to ask you if you wanted to come with him, Tokoyami and Ojiro today but you were gone when he woke up. At least he had your number and he messaged you to make sure you were okay.

You responded back pretty quickly that everything was fine, you just had to take care of something first and then you'd meet them at the beach.

Shoji thought nothing of it. So when Ojiro asked if he wanted to come along with them downtown because Tokoyami needed to pick up more art supplies before their next class, he readily agreed.

He honestly didn't expect to see you there, let alone run into you. Literally.

You panted, rounding the corner, your eyes round with fear as adrenaline pumped through your veins. But you weren't watching where you were going.

Crashing into someone's very solid chest, your force knocked them over, sending the two of you toppling over instantly.

Springing up, you quickly apologized. "I'm so sorry!!"

All else blanked from your head as you saw who it was you exactly landed on and your jaw dropped open.

"Shoji?!"

Suppressing a groan, he sat up, encircling your waist carefully to ensure you wouldn't fall.

His brow furrowed in confusion as he helped the two of you up into a standing position, completely ignoring Ojiro and Tokoyami's questioning stares. "What are you doing?"

You opened your mouth to answer him when all of the sudden, you were hit by a blinding light.

Various enraged cries echoed from the alley you had just rushed out of.

"Get back here!!!"

"Shoot." You muttered under your breath. "My paralysis wore off."

"You're using your quirk?!" Ojiro exclaimed in shock. "You know that's against the rules!!!"

You ushered everybody into the nearest store hastily, hiding behind All Might merchandise to keep out of sight. "You want to lecture me now or after we call the police?"

While Tokoyami dialed for the local police, Shoji shifted closer to you, using his dupli-arms to hide you from view.

"Who are they?" He asked you.

He knew you weren't the type to go around causing trouble. If you had used your quirk, it had to be because you were cornered with no way out. He knew you.

And judging by that foreign, hesitant look in your eyes, you knew it, too.

"It's nothing, I'm fine." You mumbled under your breath, refusing to look at him.

Shoji didn't say anything else on the matter, dropping it entirely when a shadow passed over him.

You squeezed your eyes shut and held your breath as the men searched for you, your breath hitching when Shoji's grip around you tightened protectively. Too many times you had imagined his arms around you but this was a scenario you didn't exactly picture.

The sirens wailing outside had you relaxing the tiniest bit, the rest of the tension leaving your body as the police arrested the three men using their quirks to create destruction.

Shoji didn't let you go quite yet though. Not until he was sure every last one of them left.

Pulling back, he allowed you to slip out of his arms. And that's when he saw it.

The blood.

The cut on your cheek was smeared with crimson and he questioned how he didn't notice that sooner.

Cradling your cheek, he angled your face, his jaw ticking as he got a better look at your injury.

"Y/N."

You gulped as he used your first name without any honorific. You knew he meant business and your heart fluttered at how much he seemed to care for you in that moment.

You shoved down your feelings, forcing yourself to breathe normally, dreading that he would notice how nervous you were.

It wasn't that you really had anything to be anxious about, you knew Shoji would never judge you for any reason. Kind-hearted despite how often he had gotten teased when he was younger, he never let it affect him in any way other than pushing him towards his best self.

You always admired that about it.

Shoji was such a gentle giant and you were one of the few he told about his past and what ultimately led him to striving to become a hero.

Which is why you were so caught off guard by the anger simmering beneath the surface of his eyes as he tended to the abrasion on your cheek.

The officers contained the situation quickly, arresting those that were causing chaos. The same gang of boys who were responsible for your injuries. Tokoyami and Ojiro filed out of your makeshift hiding place first, reporting what you had seen before Shoji helped you up and they turned your attention to you.

All three of their expressions changed from quelled worry to disbelief as you denied all allegations they had clearly made against you.

Still, the police officers couldn't go against it if you didn't even admit to it but brought the boys down to the station for processing. They would be able to fit the pieces together later once the camera footage of the convenience store was recovered. Until then, they let you go.

After you refused medical treatment when the police arrived on the scene, absolutely hating hospitals, you trekked back to the dormitory to sort out your injuries.

They were rather mild and you weren't worried about it at all. The hero-in-training hovering over you though, said otherwise.

You sat on one of the many couches in the common area of Heights Alliance so that he could patch you up. It was a good thing that the dorms were empty since everyone was gone for the rare off day that they got.

Shoji had ushered Ojiro and Tokoyami to go on without him to meet up with the rest of their class at the beach, promising that he would look after you and make sure that you didn't actually need a hospital.

But you also thought it was to make sure you weren't going to do anything reckless again.

He had already scolded you for not taking your wounds seriously enough and insisted on treating them, which was a bit weird because he never was one for insisting on anything unless he felt strongly enough about it.

The atmosphere was tense as he put away the rest of the medical supplies, settling for a simple butterfly closure after he cleaned the area.

Now, he was staring at you as if he wanted to devour you. Heat flooded to your lower regions no matter how hard you tried to stop it. It was clear that he was frustrated, borderline angry and upset with you for reasons unclear to you but hope kindled in your heart.

There was no way he liked you like that. He never said anything about it before.

Regardless, no one should look that good while they were enraged. The silent fury simmering beneath the surface of his being was too good of a look on him.

"Are you going to tell me what that was all about?" Shoji questioned, peeling off his mask and revealed a deep-seated frown etched on his face.

Your breath caught in your throat. No matter how many times you saw his face, it never failed to take your breath away and stop time completely.

He was beautiful.

"I-I—" You stammered, at a loss for words due to his vulnerability in front of you. He clearly trusted you a great deal. You wanted to return the gesture.

Your heart rate spiked in nervousness and you swallowed hard.

Taking a deep breath to steady yourself, your voice got quieter and more solemn as you told him about these people who had been bullying your little brother. Your parents weren't in the picture, and since your aunt, who had taken the two of you in, didn't care much other than making sure you were fed and attending school, you knew you couldn't depend on her for help.

You had been bullied too, something you told your brother the second you walked in one weekend and he burst into tears. You felt horrible. At UA, you were too far away to protect him, but you promised you'd do something about it.

Logically, you knew you should've gone to the authorities. But you were just so blinded by rage and hell bent on revenge for these boys who had struck him across the face and punched him in the eye more than once that you weren't going to let it go on for a second longer.

Shoji was silent when you finished. You played with your fingers in your lap, unsure of what to do. Maybe you talked too much.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

Your head snapped up and you gaped. You didn't have an answer for him.

Shoji sighed and his eyes saddened. "You can rely on me, on our friends. We would have helped you."

You looked back down, his gaze too intense for you to hold. He was staring at you too earnestly and you felt the hurt that resonated within him at the actions you didn't take to reach out towards him.

"I know." You whispered. "But I didn't want any of you to get involved."

A discontented noise emitted from the back of his throat and Shoji's mouth pressed in a hard line, clearly disagreeing with you but not voicing it.

The silence turned uncomfortable and you shifted in place, discreetly rubbing your thighs together as a shiver passed through your body.

Your eyes widened as he draped his shawl over you. You gulped as Shoji bulking form loomed over you, your heart now beating faster for another reason entirely.

"S-Shoji?!"

"Mezo..." He murmured. "We're alone. You can call me Mezo."

This wasn't anything new, you had already been comfortable enough to call him by his given name when the two of you were on your own but this was the first time he had requested you to say it before you got a chance to speak it.

He beat you to the punch. How unlike him.

You blushed, arching your back into his touch as he gripped your waist and drew you close to him to warm you up, heat flooding to your lower regions without permission at his low voice. "Mezo."

He groaned, his head falling into the crook of your neck at how intimate his name sounded when it fell from your lips. Physical affection wasn't rare between you two, but it largely remained platonic.

Until now. He couldn't suppress it any longer.

Capturing your lips in a heated kiss, he moved over you, unable to stop himself from pinning you to the couch.

"Ahh~" You moaned as he detached himself from your lips, keening as he continued down, pushing his jacket out of the way for better access to your neck. You weren't against this, but it was going too fast. You wanted him to slow down so that you could at least see him. "M-Mezo, w-wait..."

Stifling a groan, he reluctantly parted from your skin, catching your gaze.

Worried he had made you uncomfortable, he questioned, "Do you not want this?"

After you shook your head so violently that he was surprised you didn't knock into anything, he raised an eyebrow when you didn't express anything else.

"Then what's wrong?" Shoji asked lowly, voice gravelly and giving away just how much of an effect you had on him.

You bit your lip shyly at how you probably looked. Spread out for him, flushed to the core and panting. Your mind was racing. He had kissed you.

"S-Someone could walk in," You objected, stammering as you were only half aware that you guys were in the common area. "Don't you think we should— holy shit!!"

While you were protesting, he took the opportunity to latch onto the sweet spot under your neck, sucking harshly.

You couldn't help but whimper, your hands splayed against his broad chest as he continued to paint your skin with splotches of purple and pink.

"Mezo, come on, we should— eep!!"

Fed up with your objections as it hindered his passionate onslaught to your supple skin, Shoji hooked your legs around his waist, his huge hands cupping your ass as he practically sprinted to his room.

This time, your lips descended onto his, connecting the two of you together all the way there. You rocked against his hard-on pressed in between your bodies, moaning into his mouth as your core throbbed with need.

A growl ripped from the back of his throat as you did, and he leaned down to lay you on his bed, never separating himself from you for a second.

Cupping his face with both of your hands, you parted your lips, letting him explore your hot cavern. He slotted his body between your hips.

The two of you groaned in tandem as one of your hands slithered down to cup the stiff bulge and you whimpered when he pressed his knee against your clothed core. The pressure made slick pool in your panties and caused it to stick uncomfortably to your wet folds.

"Y/N..." He breathed shakily, his eyes clouded, giving away how much you affected him. "Can I—"

"Yes, please." You cut him off, unable to wait a second longer. "Please, Mezo, fuck me?"

Shoji's eyes widened and his cock got impossibly harder, straining against the confinements of his pants as he heard you beg for him. Beg for his cock to fill you up.

Fuck, that was so hot.

Your core was already throbbing with the need to have him inside of you. If he didn't do something soon you were sure you were going to combust.

Seeing his hesitancy as his fingers danced along the waistband of your pants, you quickly got tired of waiting and undressed by yourself, throwing your clothes in an uncaring heap onto the floor.

His eyes grew round in awe as your bare skin, breasts and that special place between your legs was revealed for him to freely drink in as you laid out before him, not an ounce of shame coloring your cheeks, save for the pink tips of your ears.

Cute.

Your back arched as his mouth latched onto one of your nipples, his big hands kneading the soft flesh, going harder when your response spurred him on. You whined as he flicked the pebbled tit, crying out as he bit down on it gently, a shock shooting through your system.

Shoji was studying every single one of your reactions to his touch, drinking it up as his eyes devoured you with barely restrained hunger.

"So... you like to be treated roughly..." He mused as he pulled upwards, your body following his touch as he let go of your breasts abruptly. "That's very interesting."

You whimpered in protest but that faded as he took his shirt off, the defined and sculpted muscle enough to make you forget what you were about to complain about. He was ripped, his torso flexing powerfully as he threw his shirt in the direction of the growing pile of clothes.

Licking your lips, you pulled him down to his level as he hastily undid the button of his pants, shoving it just past his hips so that his cock sprang free.

Your jaw dropped. He wasn't wearing underwear?!

Aside from that, he was fucking huge. How was even going to fit inside of you?!

You weren't given any time to dwell on his size as a finger probed your entrance. Your hands shot down to his wrist instinctively.

"M-Mezo, I'm s-sensitive—!!"

You cut off with a cry as he slipped it in, stretching you out.

Shoji closed his eyes, trying to restrain himself but you were just so hot and tight, pulsing around his finger like nothing else he ever felt.

"Is it too much?" He asked caringly, kissing you to ease you through it. You were unbelievable tight, he could already feel you clenching down on his single digit. "Do you want to stop?"

If your mind wasn't clouded with lust, you would've picked up on the subtle teasing lilt of his voice, as though he already knew what you were going to say.

"No..." You protested, squeezing your eyes shut, unknowingly doing exactly what he expected.

You could take it. You wanted him to make you take it.

Your eyes widened as he cursed behind you and that was when you realized that you said that last part out loud.

Oops. You were really in for it now.

You gasped in surprise as his hands released your wrists, but it was only temporary as he hooked your legs around his waist before he was immobilizing you again. Struggling slightly even though you were clearly overpowered, you begged for him to let you touch him before you died but he refused, shutting you up with a passionate kiss that stole your breath away.

Your body lurched and you wailed as he finally sank into your cunt, moaning and panting like a dog in heat as he sheathed his massive member all the way inside of your spasming channel.

A broken whimper of his name fell from your lips as his hips finally pressed flush against your ass, mewling as his balls rested against your puckered hole. You buried your face into his neck, ashamed of your reaction. He had barely done anything yet and already you felt like you were on the brink of cumming.

"Mezo—" You warned breathlessly, mouth gaping at the sheer size of him, your hole struggling to adjust. "Ngh!!"

Shoji braced himself up on his forearms, swearing under his breath as you clamped down around him. His fingers laced with yours from where he was still pinning your arms over your head, bending down to kiss you in order to distract you from the stretch.

You were hot, tight, and squeezing him with so much force, he already felt like he was going to cum. Stuttering out your name, he hissed as you clenched around him again.

"Y-Y/N, stop— don't do that." He begged, one of his hands fisting in your hair as he held onto his last thread of restraint while you adjusted to his size.

"C-Can't help it, Mezo." You whimpered, scratching his broad back as you fought the urge to arch your hips, knowing that was just going to encourage him to move before you were ready. "You... You're so big."

He had never prided himself on things like this, by how much he received praise or compliments from others so that he didn't have to question the authenticity of it, preferring most times to simply acknowledge it then let it go so that it didn't go to his head.

But he couldn't help it with you. There was something about the way you said it that ignited a flame of passion inside of him and it could not be put out.

Your nails dug into his back and a moan ripped from your throat as you felt him swell inside of you, catching on your walls without even trying.

"M-Mezo?!" You cried out in shock. "Why are you getting, oh fuck—"

A guttural groan sounded in the empty space and he let go of you, straightening up.

"You're so tight and warm." Shoji moaned, his left hand fisting the sheets as he gave a few experimental rolls of his hips, the other caressing your hip while his eyes fixated on where the two of you were joined together. "You feel like heaven, Y/N."

You squeaked in mortification as he said that, clapping a hand over your mouth as he thrusted into you harder, unable to contain the sounds spilling out of your mouth any longer. He felt so good inside of you. Pulsing and hot, thick and hard, it was a wonder how you were delirious with pleasure on his cock.

"Fuck..." You hissed through clenched teeth, your eyes tightly screwed shut.

Shoji stilled instantly, worried he had hurt you. His eyes scanned over your flushed face in concern.

"Are you alright? Do you want to stop?" He asked quickly and would've pulled out of you if your legs didn't lock around his hips, preventing him from even thinking about it a second longer.

You desperately shook your head then yanked him down to your level.

"Go fast, Mezo, fuck me hard." You pleaded. "Please."

There was no time to feel embarrassed by the words that came out of your mouth as he obliged instantly. Stars blinded your vision and you arched into his touch as he fucked you with a vigor that wasn't present before.

Shoji slammed your wrists down above your head and he kissed you hard, all of it teeth and tongue as he licked away your whimpers before they could break the symphony of wet skin slapping against skin that broke through the still atmosphere of his room.

Both of you were glad everyone was gone for the day because with how much noise you were making, it was clear what was going on.

His lips glossed over your pulse point, licking and sucking at the flushed skin there, marking you once again.

You shivered at the sensation of having him pressed against you and yet still attending to you with the same care you had come to expect from him. Your best friend now turned lover. If this was going to be more than a one-time deal.

"Mezo!!" You cried out as he finally pulled away from your neck, satisfied with the purple that bloomed there.

Shoji's teeth sank into your shoulder as he came deep inside of you, painting your walls with hot, thick and sticky ropes of cum.

You whimpered as he emptied in your ripe cunt, his release setting off yours and the powerful shockwaves of your orgasm crashed over you like a tsunami, causing your body to tremble uncontrollably. The copious amounts of his cum leaked out the instant he pulled out of you and your hole fluttered, no longer having his length to stuff you to the brim. You felt a bit sad now that you were left empty, and sat up, thinking that you guys were done.

How wrong you were.

You didn't have to look down to see that he was still hard as his cock pressed against your inner thigh the moment he kissed you again.

"Mezo?!" You shrieked, moaning wantonly against his lips as he moved over you once more. "How are you still hard?!"

He groaned, obviously in discomfort for having been denied even though he just came. "I'm sorry, Y/N, I need to cum again to make it go down."

Your tongue darted out to wet your lips at the sight of the leaking head and you moved to try and suck him off, wanting nothing more than the taste of him on your tongue as he shot his last load inside your mouth but he shook his head and stopped you short.

"You don't have to do that." Shoji said quickly, his cheeks flushing pink as he imagined you with your ass up as your cheeks were stuffed with his cock. Fuck, you'd look so good like that. But he had something else in mind.

Your eyes had glazed over a long time ago from the pleasure that he delivered to your system.

"I want to." You implored, batting your eyes at him, pupils blown wide.

Shoji surged forward, kissing you harder than last time and you melted into his touch. Any other time, he wouldn't fight you on it. But he didn't want to make you work any harder, even if it looked like you really wanted to suck him off. For now, he was content just to see you like this.

Spread out in front of him for only his eyes to see.

"Can you lay like this, Y/N?" He asked, gently maneuvering you onto your tummy and perking your rear up as a hand trailed down your spine to get you into the position he wanted to see you in. "I'll finish quickly."

You moaned quietly, still turned on and horny from before. Even though he had satisfied you so completely, there was a part of you that still longed to have him again.

You wanted him to stuff his cock in you like this.

So you couldn't help but mess with him a bit as the slick sounds of him jerking himself off started and breathy moans fell from his lips. You could go another round for him.

Poking out your ass a bit more, you smiled to yourself as his breath hitched and his movements stuttered. Swaying it from side to side purposefully to entice him, you were shocked when it worked a little too well, bringing out the beast in the tame boy that was your best friend.

Your eyes shot open and your jaw dropped open in a soundless cry as he pushed into you without warning, sinking his fat cock balls-deep into your pussy still quivering with the aftershocks of your last orgasm.

"Mezo!! Ahhh—" You cried out, caught off guard but unbelievably turned on so much that it filled you with shame.

A messy mixture of your juices and his thick cum pushed out of you as he rammed into you all the way to the hilt and all the oxygen disappeared from your lungs.

The sloppy sounds of your cunt making as he fucked you into his bed had you gripping onto his pillow and slamming it against your face to curb all the noises that were tearing from your throat.

It was yanked out of your grasp a second later.

"Don't hide, let me hear you." Shoji begged, unable to help himself from shoving his cock into the deepest parts of your little cunny. You looked so pretty spread out underneath him like this, at his mercy entirely as he pinned you down. Your arousal ran down your thighs as he continued to fuck you, his fat cock stuffing your hole perfectly.

Like you were made for him.

He threw his head back, he redoubled his efforts to make you feel as good as your pussy was making him feel.

"You look so beautiful when you're taking my cock like this." Shoji whispered to himself in awe, disbelieving that his dream was finally coming true after all this time as he watched his length disappear into you over and over again, completely entranced. "Feels so good, hhgh—!!"

Your hole fluttered around his thick girth, struggling to take his size as he pumped in and out of you at an alarming speed.

Whining, you could do nothing else but take it as he pounded you raw and rough, his hips slapping into your ass with a vigor that blanked your mind and left you gasping at the sensation.

Your wrists, still pinned down by his hands as his duplicated gripped your hips for stability as he got you closer to that peak, strained against his strength as the pressure built up in your stomach. "Mezo...'m gonna... gonna—"

"Gonna cum for me, pretty girl? Cream your cunny on my cock?" Shoji murmured, reducing his thrusts to sharp ruts, focusing all his attention on that little spot that made you see stars. "C'mon, give me one more. I need it."

That did it.

Your orgasm washed over you and your eyes rolled into the back of your head, your body trembling violently as he continued to push your limits, pumping in and out of you erratically before emptying himself into you with a deep groan.

Face flushed and eyes glassy, stilling rolling back from the throws of the intensity of your orgasm, you panted, twisting back to meet him in a kiss much softer and more loving than all the previous ones.

Now that his pent up frustration had been dealt with in the best possible way, he pulled out of you with a soft grunt, kissing you wordlessly when you whined at the loss of him.

Shoji hushed you softly as he cleaned the mess dripping out of you with a warm washcloth, urging you to go to the bathroom.

You couldn't stand up though, lacking the strength after that very thorough dicking down he gave you. Legs like jelly, you would've collapsed to the floor if he didn't catch you in time, pulling you up to his chest to carry you the rest of the way.

You hid your face in the crook of his neck as he took care of you, seeing as how all your energy was depleted. Slapping his chest halfheartedly in embarrassment as he chuckled when you jolted as he cleaned the sore but achingly sensitive bud between your legs.

Shoji nudged your ear with his nose, murmuring softly. "Are you alright?"

You hummed, eyelids heavy as you started to drift off.

He kissed the top of your head before bringing you back to bed so that you could take a nap. Somewhere between the walk from his bathroom to his bed, you stirred, arising from your light slumber only to be met with a concerned expression.

"Calm down, Mezo," You giggled, pecking him on the lips softly. "I'm good."

His shoulders slumped in relief. He was kind of worried he had broken you after a session like that. Scratching the back of his neck once you laid down, he hesitated before speaking.

"Don't worry me like that again. You're too reckless for your own good." He told you, anxiety resting heavy on his features.

You wiggled your eyebrows at him suggestively. "I don't know... That was a pretty good punishment if you ask me."

Shoji rolled his eyes but a hint of a smile played upon his lips. "I'm serious, Y/N."

Your smile disappeared and you nodded solemnly, sheepish now that you had been chastised.

"I know, I'm sorry." You apologized quietly, remorseful. You hadn't meant to worry him or any of them really. You honestly thought that you could handle it.

You had fought villains before, you thought you could tame a few punk kids who were bullying your little brother. You almost felt ashamed that they had managed to best you.

The initial idea was to capture them and report them to the authorities, since they were a part of a crew who liked to rob stores for fun, but the tables turned on you when they freely used their quirks on you.

Luckily, you had been able to dodge most of them, only sustaining minor damage from an attack you hadn't avoided in time.

Shoji knelt down by the bedside and your brow furrowed when he didn't climb under the covers with you.

"Mezo?" You squeaked when he engulfed you in a hug, all your insecurities melting away as his warmth flooded you.

He trembled as you said his name but otherwise didn't move. Instead, he mumbled something against your neck and you laughed.

"I can't quite hear you." You teased him, prying him away to get a good look at his eyes. They were swirling with an unknown emotion and you swallowed hard. "What's wrong?"

Shoji stared at you, his gaze boring into your soul as he took down all your walls you had built up around your heart to protect yourself with an ease that shocked you.

"Rely on me." He murmured, lacing his fingers with yours and gulping at how small your hands were compared to his. "I want you to rely on me like..."

You couldn't breathe. It sounded like...

"Like what?" You prompted breathlessly, not daring to hope that he was going to say what you so longed to hear from him.

His cheeks pinked and he turned away from you. "Nothing."

Your heart sank into your chest and you visibly deflated.

"Oh..." You said softly, expression saddening when he refused to look at you.

Gathering the sheets around you to cover your naked body, you suppressed a shiver as the cold air got through and you blindly reached around for your clothes on the floor.

Shoji's mouth pressed in a hard line and he shook his head. Any other time, he would be there to help you but not now. Not when his mind was racing with the possibilities of what could go wrong if he confessed his true feelings for you right here and now.

It was overwhelming him and he felt overtaken by fear that you would reject him, destroying the close friendship you had.

But...

"Y/N."

You straightened up, fumbling with the sheet as it accidentally slipped. But you blushed when Shoji draped his shawl over you, his scent filling your nose and you tripped over your words, thoroughly flustered for some kind of explanation as to why you were reacting like you were back in your first year of high school.

"I like you."

You balked, jaw dropping open in shock.

Shoji actually jumped back, startled as you swore in front of him.

"You're kidding."

His brow furrowed in confusion and he crossed his arms. "No, I'm perfectly serious."

You shook your head. There was no way that he, the coolest, most respectable and kindest guy you have ever met and had the privilege of calling your best friend, liked you back.

But judging by that affronted look on his face, you might've jumped to conclusions too soon.

Warily, you approached him, abandoning the search for your clothes.

You hastily apologized. "I'm sorry, I guess it's hard to believe how someone like you would be interested in me."

Now in front of him, you had a chance to see how much he towered over you. It was different from when you would hang out in each other's rooms where he would crouch down on the floor or sit on a chair so that the height difference wasn't so obvious.

But you felt safe as he curled his arms around you tentatively, even though it was such a contrast to how he was fucking the brains out of you earlier.

"Well, I do." Shoji murmured into your hair as he brought you in for a hug, firm and unyielding in his feelings for you even though you had yet to say anything.

You hadn't said it back but you hadn't shot him down either. He didn't know if it was foolish to hope for a chance that you would want to be with him too, or perhaps, oh no, had he made you uncomfortable?

Maybe you weren't saying anything because you didn't know how to reject—

"I like you too." You mumbled into his chest.

This time, Shoji was the one to do a double take. "Y/N?!"

"Oh hush." You said, hiding your face from his frantic gaze so that he couldn't see how red your face was. Confessing feelings was exhausting and now you wanted nothing more than to crawl into bed with your new boyfriend.

Shoji's chest rumbled underneath your fingertips and just when you thought your face couldn't burn anymore out of embarrassment and shyness, he leaned back and tipped your chin up.

"I'm glad you return my feelings." He smiled, a pure smile that radiated the most wholesome level of happiness possible and your heart skipped a beat.

You found you mirrored his joy instinctively, it was contagious. And when he closed the distance to kiss you once more, it sealed a pact that would stay forever and could never be broken.

"I think I'll have to be more reckless from now on." You breathed when he finally pulled away and a small pout formed on his lips.

"Y/N..." Shoji warned, not finding your joke funny in the slightest.

You giggled, looping your arms around his neck as you stood on your tiptoes, booping his nose with yours. "I'm kidding, but I do think it was worth it."

He raised an eyebrow. "And why is that?"

You grinned, a cheeky smile that told him he hadn't seen the last of your mischief.

"Because it finally got you to confess."

Taglist: @katsukis-sad-angel

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troubatrain · 3 years

Text

want you to want me - m. tkachuk

a/n: i’m awful at intros but this fic is my whole ass child. i started it months ago and i picked it up back and then i just couldn’t stop writing. now we’re at a whopping 10k words and i’m really happy with the way this one came out. i hope you guys like it as much as i loved writing it.

big thanks to @hookingminor @igor-shestyorkin & @tkafuckit for reading this as i wrote it and gassing me up ily all sm

warnings: smut

You were Matthew’s dream girl, and you didn’t have a fucking clue. You were leaning against the cold metal bleachers of your former high school, chatting with whatever teacher probably wanted to hear all about that shiny NWSL contract you signed right out of college with the Chicago Red Stars. It was well deserved, a few national titles in college put you in the position in the first place, and Matthew respected the hell out of you. You wouldn’t know, by the way he never seems like he actually wants to speak to you and the few snide remarks about your sport in general. That started forever ago, when Matthew royally fucked up any chance he had with you later in life because he was a competitive asshole.

It started when you were twelve, and middle school was nothing short of a mess. Matthew was growing into his own, adding a near foot to his height over one summer while his father and coaches doted on the fact that he was getting bigger. Getting bigger meant getting better, and for a few years winning was the most important thing in the world. But, becoming a hormonal preteen came with something else, feelings about the girl who sat three rows behind him in almost all of his classes.

Then third period gym class came around, and Matthew was a competitive monster. The kind of kid who took that way too seriously, and you accidentally became public enemy number one. You were the only person in his class who could even come close to beating him at anything, because you were just as much of an athlete as he was. Soccer had become your craft, and much like Matthew, you declared you’d go pro one day. So, Matthew did what any other insecure twelve year old boy would, he teased you relentlessly. It was awful, but by the time Matthew had gone off to play for the National team you had forgotten about his bullshit.

Apparently, you’d done something in a past life to warrant dealing with Matthew for longer than you ever anticipated. Jamie was your little sister, and Taryn’s best friend. Best friend was probably understatement, the pair were inseparable on and off the field. They trained together, they played on the same teams and that meant way too much time with the rest of the Tkachuk’s. You learned quickly, that the rest of their family was wonderful and Matthew seemed to be too thick headed to fall in line.

You tolerated Matthew, brushing his silly remarks off just like you did when you were younger. The thing was, Matthew didn’t want you to just tolerate him, but he didn’t know how to get you to stop hating him. You make your way over to Matthew who’d been standing next to his brother since the start of your sister’s game.

“Hi Brady,” You greet, tapping Brady on the shoulder who pulled you into a bone crushing hug. That annoyed Matthew the most, the way you seemed to love his siblings and despise him. In your defense, nobody was more supportive of your professional career than Brady, who’d made a promise to catch a game the second he could, “Hi Matthew.”

You were waiting for something from Matthew, an acknowledgement for finally achieving a dream of yours. You’d gotten the congratulations from the rest of his family, a massive celebration because Keith thought you deserved it. Matthew probably didn’t think you did. You could practically hear his smug little voice about how much his recently inked contract was compared to yours, because you’d heard it since you were kids. He used to rip on your athletic abilities every chance he could, something about how it didn’t matter how hard you could kick a ball you couldn’t hold a hockey stick so he was just better.

“You’re here!” You hear the chipper voice of your little sister approach, Jamie’s sweaty postgame arms wrapped around your waist. You’d been in Chicago, signing some paperwork and looking into finding a place to stay when you had to go for camp. You promised you’d make it back in time, and your flight landed less than five hours ago but you made it.

Matthew bit the inside of his cheek to keep his smile to himself, watching his own sister push past him to see you. Taryn loved you, because sometimes she just needed a big sister and her brothers were in another country most

of the time. It was the part that killed him the most, seeing you with his family. You fit right in, a fierce athlete with drive that rivaled his own. Brady side-eyed his own brother, watching him instead of the scene unfolding in front of him. He was frustrated with his own brother for not just telling you the truth, that he teased you because he was an idiot who didn’t know how to handle having a crush on you.

But Brady was going to do it himself if his brother didn’t.

***

Matt, you don’t have a girlfriend right?

Matthew knew damn well he should not have answered his sister’s question, but when he realized her best friend had been sitting right next to her in the kitchen, his curiosity got the best of him. So he did, telling his sister he was single and sparing her details of any of the girls he’d gone on dates with the past year. That was his life is Calgary, a constant revolving door so no one would see what was underneath layers of sarcasm and angst. But every summer, he’d come home and wonder when he’d start to build a life for himself, and if he’d ever find that person to do it with. That was when his brain would start to wander, fantasies of a future that always seemed to involve you. He loved to imagine it, the years that you’d both spend supporting the other’s dream. Matthew would do anything to make sure you achieved yours, and he thought you’d do the same. Then you’d both settle down, the big house with the white picket fence and a shiny ring on your finger Matthew put there himself and years of arguing about what sport your future children would play - he’d even consider letting you have just one.

Unfortunately, none of that could be real until he figured out how to get you to hate him less. Taryn apparently had the same idea, and had been scheming with your sister for months. The two girls were looking at Matthew with devilish grins on their faces, like whatever they came up with would totally work.

“Y/N doesn’t have a boyfriend,” Your sister hums, sipping the smoothie they forced Matthew to drive them to go get, “It’s sad actually-”

“We think you should date,” Taryn explains, Matthew’s eyes went wide. His sister didn’t know the whole story, or just how far back this stupid fued went. Taryn always loved you, so Matthew just kept his remarks to himself.

“I know you know Y/N doesn’t like me very much,” Matthew explains, “So tell me how that’s going to work.”

“Apologize to her, if she can forgive me for anything she’ll forgive you,” Jamie sighs, thinking of all the times you’d shown her mercy when she didn’t deserve it.

“You’ve got to be sorry,” Brady interrupts, mouth full of food while he goes to go look for more in the fridge. He turns around, Matthew’s eyes giving him daggers, “What? You were a dick to her for years, you’ve got to fix that first.”

It didn’t take much convincing after that, Taryn had already planned out what Matthew should say to you. Matthew wasn’t going to repeat those words, because he knew exactly what he’d say to you if he ever got the chance. He was trying to fix his past, because the way he acted towards you was the one thing he regrets.

So with the help of your little sister and the Find my Friends app, Matthew was pulling up to a soccer field he’d been to plenty of times. He used to run through the park nearby, catching a glimpse of your practices when you were in high school and Matthew was an afterthought. He hops out of his car, smiling when he could see you running drills alone. You were dribbling the ball, counting to yourself while you were weaving through cones you set up.

“I’ve never been good at those,” Matthew calls out, walking over to you while you stopped and caught your breath, “I kick the cones with my skate every single time.”

“Maybe you’re not as good as you think you are,” You tease, grabbing your water and guzzling it down, “What are you doing here?”

“I, uh, I came to apologize?” Matthew admits, knowing his face was probably bright red. He was nervous, the good kind like he got before a big game, “I was just an insecure kid then, and you didn’t deserve what I did just because I was afraid you’d beat in something.”

Matthew left out the part where he felt like he was still that kid all the time. All of those insecurities about himself seemed to be picked up by every reporter in Canada when he was there. You bit your lip, pretending like you were trying to debate whether or not you should forgive Matthew at all. In reality, you would have forgiven him ages ago if he’d just apologized sooner. It was so long ago, and sometimes you thought Matthew’s constant taunting made you better. He was pleading, baby blue eyes staring at you sadly while he waited for your answer. He looked like he didn’t think he deserved to be forgiven, shoulders slumped while he tried to read your body language. It was something you noticed about Matthew forever ago, he could have everything in the world but when he looked at you he seemed almost sad.

“I mean I could forgive you, but only if you beat me,” You cross your arms, raising an eyebrow at Matthew, “If I win, I don’t have to and if you win all is forgiven.”

“Really? Isn’t that why we were in this situation to begin with?” Matthew points out, crossing his arms at you.

“I thought you weren’t that kid anymore,” You remind of his own words, testing him to see if he’d put his money where his mouth was. Matthew smirks, chuckling to himself, “C’mon Tkachuk let’s see what you got.”

Matthew shook his head, laughing and lining up next to you. You both counted to three, sprinting down the field at full force. Matthew knew his height was the only thing working to his advantage while he tried to keep up with you. You were nearing your finish line, and Matthew didn’t think he was going to win. You were going to forgive him regardless, but Matthew didn’t know that. His arms stretched out, grabbing your waist and pulling you into his chest. Matthew turned his body around, stepping over the line before you did.

“God, you’re such a fucking cheater Matthew,” You hit his chest, Matthew’s hands still firmly placed on your hips.

“I didn’t want to lose,” Matthew admits, all of his smug attitude diminishing immediately, “Just want you to forgive me.”

“I’ll forgive you if you never pull that shit on me again,” You poke his chest, slipping out of his grip and running to your stuff before he could notice how nervous he was making you.

No. Absolutely not. You told yourself while you checked your phone, rolling your eyes at the warning text from Jamie that Matthew was on his way, you couldn’t have anything but indifference to Matthew Tkachuk. It got harder everytime you saw him, the past few years had been nothing short of kind to him, he was growing from a dumb immature boy to a man more and more every summer. You turn around, peeking at Matthew who was sitting down and catching his breath, a winning smile on his face, the same kind he had the very first time he schooled everyone at floor hockey in middle school.

Maybe you could be friends.

***

Matthew liked having you as a friend, mostly because as of right now that was all he was going to get. You definitely didn’t trust him, which was valid considering Matthew had been a dick to you for years, but he was working on it. He had to, that uncontrollable feeling that he cared about you was getting harder to shove back down with every year that passed.

“You’re friends now, you don’t need to stare at her like a creep anymore,” Brady scoffs, watching his brother gawk at you from afar. Matthew couldn’t help it, you just had a glow about you, you always did, but somehow in the summer you were golden. Tonight you looked even better, maybe it’s because you smiled at him when he walked instead of scowling like you usually did.

“He’s in love with you,” Steph giggles, sipping her drink and giving Matthew a side eye, “He’s been staring at you all night.”

“He apologized to me,” You confess, holding in that little secret about Matthew’s visit to the field even from your best friend. You had the same friends, the same group of people who’d been pushing the two of you to work it out for years. It wasn’t that you didn’t want them to know that they no longer had to worry about one of you blowing up because the other was there, you just wanted everyone to let it go too. Matthew deserved a little forgiveness, you could only imagine the pressure he felt on himself back then, and while he didn’t totally deserve your protection - you were going to give it to him, “Don’t-”

“Oh wonder why, I know it’s because he looooves you,” Steph teases, “Did you forgive him?”

“Yeah I mean we’re both older and I’d like to think he’s wiser, and besides our parents are way too close,” You knew this was going to be your excuse for a while. It was better for everyone that you forgave him, Jamie and Taryn spent more time together than you’d spend with anyone and you're just as close with the rest of their family. It wasn’t untrue that it was in fact for the best, but that didn’t mean Matthew’s stupid dimples didn’t persuade you before you could think about anyone else, “Can we stop talking about this?”

Matthew’s eyes didn’t leave you once that night, especially after the way Steph downed tequila shots and convinced you to join her. You deserved to celebrate, you’d accomplished something Matthew knew was your biggest dream because it was the same as his. He was proud of you, not that he’d gotten a chance to show it.

“If you’re going to go pro Y/N, you’ve got to start keeping up,” Brady chirps, watching you stumble over your own feet to walk over to him and Matthew. Matthew had seen this once before, a level of drunkenness where you turned into bambi but that was so long ago he never thought he’d see it again.

“I’ll go pro in beating your ass Brady,” You snap back, shooting daggers over Brady who was already cracking up, “Hi Matthew.”

“Hi,” Matthew’s voice was small, a weird sound considering he was usually the loudest in the room. Brady scoffs, walking away from the two of you before he snaps at how hopelessly in love his brother was. You turn your head in confusion, your mind far too hazy to realize why Brady was so annoyed in the first place, causing Matthew to chuckle, “Want to play? Might be best if we’re on the same team.”

Matthew’s thumb shot over to the beer pong set up on the other side of the room, a mischievous smirk on face, “I mean if it’s for the best.”

Matthew’s arm wrapped around your shoulders holding you close to his chest while you both played pong was definitely not for the best, and it wasn’t helping that stupid crush you had on him. You could feel Steph’s stare from the corner of the room, and you look at her to mouth a don’t at her. It was nice having Matthew on your team, finally a moment where instead of arguing with each other about who’s elbow was clearly over the table - you got to do the same thing to Brady.

“Brady you’re cheating,” You call out, Matthew’s head thrown back in laughter at your seriousness.

“You heard her Brady, elbows over the table,” Matthew breathes out, his body still rumbling with laughter at his little brother’s expense.

“Oh look at you two, you’re just gonna raise some winners one day aren’t you?” Brady chirps back, both happy to see you getting along and annoyed once he realizes that means he was going to get roasted by both of you now. You felt heat rush to your cheeks, tucking your face into Matthew’s arm in hopes no one saw the way you shrunk at that stupid joke.

“We’re winners right now,” Matthew calls out, his last ball landing in the cup and sealing the game for the two of you. Matthew would raise winners with you, it was something he thought about from time to time, but those thoughts were never going to see the light of day, “Alright drunky I think it’s time to get you home.”

“You can stay, I’ll just catch a ride with someone,” You waive Matthew off, who shook his head no at you before you even started speaking.

“One, my dad would kick my ass if he knew I left you,” Matthew starts with, holding up one finger with another on the way, “Two, we’re friends now and I’d like to make sure you don’t die before you see a pro game.”

Matthew had seen you this drunk before, but what he didn’t know was that getting you home would be more difficult than he thought. You started in the direction of your house, but apparently you were a runner and a speedy one at that. Now you were barely two blocks away from Matthew’s parents place and if he could at least get you there he’d be able to call it a night - which wasn’t fucking easy.

“Alright I’ve had enough,” Matthew huffs, jogging to catch up with you and scooping you into his arms. You were hanging over his shoulder, Matthew making his way down the street with the house in his sightline. You could have cared less, laughing your ass off while Matthew walked up the stairs and finally placed you back down on your feet, “Be quiet, go up to my room and get some clothes and go sleep in the guest room.”

You weren’t quiet, not at all and Matthew was amazed not one of his parents came down to see what all the chaos was about. After Matthew had to walk you up the stairs, running back down for some water and hoping you weren’t a disaster by the time he got back - he found you in his bed. You were curled up right in the middle, an old London Knights shirt on your body, Matthew’s favorite. Matthew grabs his comforter, throwing it over your body. He sighs, leaning against his door frame and smiling to himself at how comfortable you looked, flicking off the light and retreating to the guest room.

Matthew hated the guest room. He hated how hard the mattress was and after a few hours of no sleep and tossing and turning - he gave up. Matthew hoped no one else was up, but not to his surprise his mother was already in the kitchen, and judging by the look on her face, she knew who was upstairs.

“Care to explain?” Chantal smirks, raising her eyebrows at her son. Matthew’s face got red, his landing on the back of his neck to cover the blush.

“She fell asleep before I could even get her to the guest room,” Matthew shrugs, hoping his mom wouldn’t push it any further, “I, uh, apologized the other day.”

“Good,” Chantal hums, a knowing look on her face. She didn’t like to push Matthew, her one kid who seemed to be a little rougher around the edges than the others, but that silly feud never sat right with her, “Here, bring her a coffee, I’m sure she needs it.”

Matthew nods, grabbing the mug his mother was holding out and starting to make his way up the stairs. He heard the tell her you made it from his mother and shook his head. He knew what she was thinking, especially with the way Chantal seemed to talk about you. His mother thought you were nothing short of perfect, and Matthew would be a liar if he didn’t think the same thing.

“Did I fall asleep here?” You’d woken up confused, your question only answered by the jerseys hanging on the walls, you were in Matthew’s room. You rub your eyes, the door creaking open way too loudly for how dead you felt.

“Only after you almost fell down the stairs and ran three blocks in the wrong direction,” Matthew chuckles, sitting on the edge of the bed and handing you the mug, “You know you’re fast right?”

“Yeah,” You muse, smirking to yourself and taking a sip of coffee, “I’m sorry I did that to you, and stole your bed - I can go.”

Matthew stopped you, telling to finish your coffee and relax and he’d drive you home after. You fell into a comfortable conversation, something Matthew never thought would happen.

And watching you walk up to your steps in his shirt still wasn’t something he thought he’d see, but it was better than he imagined.

***

“Hey it’s Jamie, can’t get to the phone right now…”

You groan, tossing your phone onto your bed and continuing your pace around the room. It was well after midnight, and your sister had been out all night, and past her curfew. Usually you’d cover for her, definitely taking the prize home for the cool older sister who picks her siblings and their friends up from parties. That’s what had you so worried. Sure, Jamie was a teenager and she snuck in a few little white lies with your parents just like you’d done, but Jamie always told you the truth. She’d check in with you more than her parents, letting you know that she’s going to be out late but she’s safe and if she needed anything she knew who to call. You texted sometime around ten, just checking in since it was Saturday and you were sure she had a more riveting social life than yourself. No answer. Then eleven rolled around and you didn’t hear anything, so naturally you double texted and now it’s twelve thirty and you still haven’t heard anything. You cross your arms, looking at your phone as if you could will an answer into existence. You grab it, dialing a number you weren’t even sure would work.

“Hello?” Matthew’s voice appeared on the other side of the line, clear confusion in his voice. You let out a sigh of relief, hoping Matthew would have the answer you wanted to hear so desperately.

“Is my sister at your house?” You ask, biting your lip and throwing on a pair of sweats so you could pick her up and murder her for scaring you like that. You were sure it was innocent, Jamie slept over at Taryn’s all the time, staying up way too late watching movies or when Jamie would hide going to a party from your much stricter parents.

Matthew tells you to give him a minute, and you can hear him walking through the house. By the time you heard a door open and a small fuck under his breath, your stomach dropped, “She was supposed to be home by midnight.”

“Alright, thanks anyways,” You sigh, “Do you know where they might have gone? It’s just, Jamie hasn’t answered me in hours and she usually does even if she’s out past curfew and I’m just-”

“I’ll be at your house in ten,” Matthew says, his keys alright in his hand and his foot halfway out the door. He was more mad than worried, sure his sister was out a party past curfew. Matthew was her biggest brother, and he was far more protective over her than Brady ever could be. He hated when she did this, and Matthew was pissed. You waited on your steps, Matthew car coming into view while you sprung up and practically sprinted into his car.

“You look mad,” You observe, as if it wasn’t completely obvious. You knew why, trying countless times to remind Taryn that her brother loves her and that’s why he’s like that. You thought he could go a little easier on her, but you wouldn’t dare get in the middle of that.

“I am mad,” Matthew grits out, knuckles white on his steering wheel while he drives slowly down the street. You just drove, in hopes you’d find what was obviously a house party and hopes your sisters were inside. You squint, hoping your eyes weren’t fooling you.

“Wait, pull over I think I see my neighbor,” You yell, Matthew’s foot flying on the break and you hop out. You were right, the bright orange tuft of hair you saw was like a miracle, “Hey Henry have you seen my sister?”

“Oh yeah I think she’s still inside,” Henry points to the house behind him, music blasting and a party in full swing, “I think she’s with Taryn.”

Matthew hops out of the car, grabbing your hand and pulling you into the house with him. Matthew’s fingers were laced with yours with every step he took, weaving through the crowd in hopes you’d see them. It took three bedrooms and a laundry room until you finally saw Taryn standing in the doorway. Her eyes went wide, and you pushed past them both to see Jamie with her head in the toilet. She was fine, well she was definitely in deep shit, but it wasn’t the worst thing to stumble upon. You throw her hair up, your attention moving to Matthew yelling at his sister in the hallway.

“Why didn’t you call someone,” Matthew yells, trying so damn hard to not completely snap on his baby sister. Taryn yells that her phone had died and then Jamie got sick and she didn’t know what to do. Of course they didn’t. You were probably more sympathetic, and you knew just how pissed off Matthew could get. You get up, pushing Taryn back into the bathroom and telling her to watch your sister.

“Calm down before you talk to her, please,” You plead, grabbing Matthew’s shoulders, “Besides, I sort of need some help right now.”

There it was. The very moment Matthew realized all along you could’ve been helping him. Your hands were wrapped around his biceps, a finger gently rubbing the skin right under the sleeve of his shirt. Every bit of anger disappeared from his body, a calm feeling replacing it. He knew you were right, and he’d be thankful for it later. Matthew knew he had to do the right thing by you, and he nodded, willing to follow any directions you gave him.

Matthew carried Jamie out of the house, getting both of your sisters in the car and finally heading back to your house. You knew he was still pissed off, a present frown on his face so you just took the chance. Just like he’d done before for you, you grabbed one of his hands from his steering wheel, lacing your fingers together. You caught the smile on his face, your thumb rubbing over his hand while his shoulders seemed to just relax. Once

Matthew finally helped you get Jamie inside, a night of laying on her floor to make sure she was okay ahead of you stood in the doorway with Matthew across from you.

“Thank you, I know we’re working on this friendship thing but you really didn’t have to do that,” You were eternally grateful, wrapping your arms around Matthew’s waist and tucking your head into his chest.

“You’d do the same thing for Taryn,” Matthew hums, knowing full well he definitely owed you for being Taryn’s replacement sibling with him and Brady in Canada for most of the year, “Get some rest okay?”

“Wait,” You stop Matthew, grabbing his hand one more time, “Don’t kill your sister, please she’s just a kid-”

“You’re way too easy on them,” Matthew chuckles, shaking his head at you. He knew Taryn was probably scared, and after he calmed a bit he understood where you were coming from. That didn’t mean he wasn’t going to tell her that if she ever pulls that shit again - he was going to rat her out to their parents.

And when Matthew finally got back in the car, he could see his sister’s grin in the backseat, “Don’t say it.”

She held your hand, are you sure you’re not going to malfunction now?

***

Maybe you were spiraling.

You’d been waiting for this moment your entire life, now you had a few more weeks until camp started and you were afraid. You knew you were good enough, you had to be. But what if you weren’t? You could feel the anxiety settling in, a feeling you hadn’t felt since Matthew told you soccer wasn’t a real sport in fourth grace. It’d been eating at you for weeks, deteriorating any confidence you had left in yourself. So you started pushing yourself even harder. The harder you worked the less like you were to fuck it all up. Your muscles were sore, your body was tired and it was just all becoming too much.

And Matthew noticed.

You were pushing yourself too hard, even the time you were supposed to relax with your families before your seasons started was being spent training. He understood it, the term first round exit lived rent free in his head every single time his skate hit the ice over the summer, but that didn’t make it okay. You looked tired, sluggish while you moved because you were running twice a day and training in between. And he was pissed everyone seemed to be fine with it. You should start working harder then Matthew. If it bothers you so much maybe you could join her. It wasn’t that he was jealous of your work ethic, he was worried. Matthew’s eyes followed you as you ran past his house again. The third time in one day, he’d finally decided he had enough.

Matthew took the walk to your house, charming the pants off your mother for her to tell him you were upstairs because you just got back in. He knocks twice, hearing a come in from the other side.

“What are you doing here?” You question, rolling one of your ankles that just seemed to be getting more swollen every time you started to practice. Matthew noticed it, your hands freezing one you caught his gaze.

“You’re overworking yourself,” Matthew stands his ground, he knew you could have told him to fuck off because no one hates advice they didn’t ask for quite like him, “Don’t tell me I’m wrong.”

“That’s rich coming from the kid who’s played with more broken bones than anyone I know,” You remind him of a few mistakes Matthew’s made playing through injuries he really shouldn’t, “I’m not fucking frail.”

“That’s not what this is about,” Matthew scoffs, it never once crossed his mind that he thought he was tough enough to play through injuries but you weren’t, “It’s about taking a break so you don’t get hurt.”

“I’m fine,” You huff, getting up and trying your best to hide the pain in your ankle when you stood on it. You fell forward, Matthew catching you in his arms and putting you back down the edge of your bed.

“Tell me what’s wrong?” Matthew asks with soft eyes, he bent down to take your ankle in his hand and inspect it the best he could. It was swelling, probably from the amount of pressure you’d been putting on your body with no breaks.

“What if I never score a goal?” You whisper, teary eyes finally meeting Matthew’s. His brows shot up, alarmed at how one of the best athletes he’s ever seen could feel the same way he felt right before his first NHL game. Matthew sits down next to you, hand on your thigh while you let out a cry, “What if I’m just a bust? Like I get there and nothing works and I suck.”

“You’ll score eventually,” Matthew scoffs, understanding how ridiculous you sounded but just how you felt at the same time, “Everyone does.”

“You scored like four games into your fucking career Matt,” You remind him, Matthew smiling a bit that you knew that to begin with. It would have been impossible not to know, or pretend like you didn’t keep a few tabs on his career. Matthew Tkachuk was a legend in the making, and whether or not you could feel butterflies in your stomach every time he dropped the gloves was a secret you’d take to the grave.

“I got suspended my first season too,” Matthew jokes, a teary eyed laugh escaping your lips, “I’d put down money you score in your first game.”

“Well good thing you have money to lose,” You sigh dramatically, the fear of fucking up still on your mind.

“You’ll find your groove, all legends do,” Matthew promises, throwing his arm around your shoulders. You snuggled into his side, a realization that he was becoming a comforting presence in your life with each passing day, “And if you don’t, you can always hide out in Canada with me.”

“Matty!” The same silly nickname Matthew introduced himself to you on your very first day of kindergarten slipped through your lips without realizing it. Matthew hadn’t been called that in ages, but it was welcome from you. You push his chest, “That’s not making me feel any better.”

“What if I told you the only reason I was so mean to you was because I was intimidated by how talented you were?” Matthew confesses, scratching your head with his fingers, “If I win a cup one day I think I owe you one.”

Matthew didn’t mention that in his wildest fantasies of raising that cup over his head, you were there. He’d owe you one and he hoped it was because you were there for him until he got there. Matthew saw it the same way every time, you’d tell him to go see his parents first but he’d fly right past them to get to you - the person who accidentally pushed him to be his best. He had plenty of daydreams about you winning too, remembering times you used to brag you’d go to the Olympics one day, and he hoped you were right. He wanted to see you succeed, more than anything, and he thought it would work.

“Legally you have to let me drink out of it,” You muse, shutting your eyes and letting yourself just rest against Matthew.

“It has to be Bud Light,” Matthew teases while watching you fake a gag. You grab his outstretched hand, letting him pull you up. His hands rested on the side of your face, eyes flickering to your lips for just a second. He wanted to kiss you, but he knew he had to wait. Wait for you to be ready. Wait for you to settle down. Or even just wait until he thought he had a real shot at forever.

Forever with you.

***

Matthew was kind of pissed off.

The press didn’t bother him, none of that mattered and at the end of the day Matthew was able to sleep at night knowing he was a good teammate and a decent person most of the time. This one got him though, some writer criticizing the A on his jersey, and how someone who plays like he does didn’t deserve a letter.

A letter he earned.

You could tell something was off, the way Matthew had been running alongside you was aggressive to say the least. He insisted he came with you, something about forcing you to take breaks. He was being your friend, even though your sisters seemed to disagree. Taryn’s words were replaying in your head, Matt doesn’t even care if I get hurt. That didn’t mean anything, those two had no idea what love was and Matthew caring about you a little bit didn’t mean he loved you. Besides, the way he was acting right now told a completely different story.

“Are you mad at me?” You finally slow down, sitting on a rock that was next to the hiking trail you were on.

“No?” Matthew stops dead in his tracks, his heart sinking to the pit of his stomach that he fucked this up too, “I’m fine, don’t worry about it.”

“No, tell me what’s wrong,” You push, crossing your arms and narrowing your eyes at Matthew. You could tell he was pressed about something, his neck covered in a red flush the same way it used to.

“Some stupid article about my letter, don’t worry about it,” Matthew grits, repeating his words again. His defense was up, even after you confessed to him that you were scared of not being enough.

“Get the fuck out of here with the tough guy act Matthew,” You challenge him, poking him right in the chest, “If we’re going to be friends you need to cut that shit out.”

“You really want to hear it?” Matthew barks back, fully yelling at you, “I’m tired of people thinking I don’t deserve things because I threw a few bad hits. Do you know how it feels to have everyone think you’re shitty? No you don’t, because you’re so fucking perfect that my own parents like you more than me.”

You stood there, silent while you tried to figure out how to tell him that simply wasn’t true. His entire body was shaking, the anger coursing through his veins like you’d seen many times before that. Matthew looked like he did the first time you hit a homerun in gym class, except this time it was because that same pressure never got released. You couldn’t come close to understanding the way he probably felt. You didn’t have the comparables in your own family, the constant reminders of Brady’s points tally compared to his, let alone the career his father had.

“Matty,” You whisper, grabbing his hand and running your fingers over the scars on his knuckles, “Why is this bothering you so much?”

You were sure this wasn’t the first time someone’s said he was a pest, and it sure as hell wasn’t going to be the last. Matthew sighed, the better part of his brain screaming at him to stop before he lost you too.

“I’ve felt like this forever,” Matthew whispers, eyes fixated on your hand in his, “From the moment I started getting bigger, there’s just been this pressure to play a certain way and act a certain way. I was a fucking kid, and while all of my friends got to go wherever they wanted all I ever did was practice. Then I finally get to where I wanted and I’m still getting shit on.”

“Except no one thinks you don’t deserve to be where you are,” You whisper, quiet words as if you were going to startle him, “And I know it doesn’t make up for things people say, but the people who love you think you deserve it.”

Matthew nods, pulling you into his arms and holding you close. Your arms wrapped around his waist, his words mumbled against your forehead, “I needed that.”

“I know,” You nod, smiling wide up at him, “And we need to practice more because you’re too slow, soooo catch me if you can!”

You slipped out of his arms, running away with a giggle and a smile. Matthew stopped for a second, his Neanderthal brain checking out your ass while you jogged away and his more logical one trying to process what just happened.

But what mattered most was that whatever you did worked and that meant something to Matthew.

***

Just admit you think he’s hot.

You wanted to kill your sister for making this weekend harder than it had to be. You were doing a good job at just friends with Matthew until Jamie was curled up in your bed while you packed for a lake trip with your friends. She pushed it for hours, rambling on about Matthew is actually your type and Taryn swears he’d be a good boyfriend if someone just understood him. The problem was, you were starting to see her point. Matthew had a glow up a few years ago, like one summer he’d gotten home and you were infatuated with him. It used to annoy you, because he’d been such an ass to you that you hated how attractive he was. Then things changed, and now looking at him was just frustrating you. You were terrified about the way he made you feel, like everything would be okay with one look of those blue eyes and a smirk. You felt like he had your back, a vast change from how you used to feel and it was just getting hard to hide it anymore.

Especially when Matthew looked like he did right now. He was holding himself up on the dock, shoulders broad and glistening in the moonlight above you. All your friends were inside, moving their party away from the water as the night lingered on. You wanted to run your fingers through his wet curls, the temptation was almost too much.

“I’ll be in Chicago a few times you know,” Matthew hums, enjoying the time alone he was getting with you. Anytime without Brady teasing him about what the Tkachuk’s had been referring to as the hand holding incident. He didn’t want them to think he didn’t want you, because he did, but he just needed to move at his own pace.

“You want to come see me play?” You ask, leaning back on the palms of your hands. You were surprised by the kind of man Matthew had become, it was a completely different person that he used to be. He cared so much about his loved ones, and you were starting to feel like maybe you had a place there.

“Actually thinking you could come see me play,” Matthew teases, sarcasm dripping from his words. You lifted your foot up, kicking some of the water below you to splash him, but he’d caught your ankle before you could. He stopped for a moment, running a thumb over your skin, “This looks better.”

“Don’t make you admit you were right,” You whine, Matthew swiftly pulling you into the water with him. You yelp, the water way too cold for any normal person, “It’s freezing.”

“C’mere then,” Matthew grabs your waist, pulling your body against his. His hands were splayed across your back, heat radiating off of them. One of your hands was on his shoulder, your other on his chest. You could feel his heart beating quickly, his eyes locked on yours, “Middle school Matthew would be so jealous of me right now.”

“Why’s that?” You hum, running your fingers along Matthew to play connect the dots with the beauty marks on his skin.

“Because he had the biggest crush on you,” Matthew confesses, his grip on you a little tighter, as if he was afraid you’d slip right through his fingers again, “But he was too thick headed to do anything about it.”

“What about grown up Matthew?” You ask, biting your lip. Matthew was practically holding you both up in the water, pressed so close together you could hear the hitch in his breath at your question, “Is he too thick headed to do something too?”

You wrapped your legs around Matthew’s waist, pressing your lips to his and tugging on the curls at the base of his neck. He pushed you up against the dock, helping you back up and pulling himself up next to you. You grabbed the back of his neck, latching your lips back on his. His hand was on your back, fingers toying with the back of your bathing suit, “Think we can get upstairs without anyone noticing?”

Matthew was cool most of the time. He never faltered under the pressure from his career, most of the time, and he definitely didn’t fold when it came to a pretty girl. You had him in the palm of your hand, every part of his brain malfunctioning in response to your words. You bit your lip, wondering if you’d read this entire situation. Matthew rubs a thumb along your lip, “When are you going to realize I’d do whatever you asked me to?”

The two of you snuck up the stairs, giggles and stolen kisses left in your wake. You open the door, Matthew’s hands still toying your bathing suit top, “Just take it off already Matty.”

“Don’t have to ask me twice,” Matthew breathes, his lips pressed against your neck while the garment falls to the floor, “So fucking beautiful.”

You back hit the mattress, Matthew’s hands running up your body slowly. Slow wasn’t in Matthew’s vocabulary, but he was taking his time just in case he never got this opportunity again. His fingers hooked under your bathing suit bottoms, sliding the wet fabric down your legs. You looked so beautiful, spread out just for Matthew like he’d dreamed about numerous times. His lips moved down to your breasts, teeth grazing against your skin while his tongue swirled against your nipple. You let out a breathy moan, Matthew’s ego boosting from the sound. You plucked at his curls while his mouth moved down to where you were craving him most, a gentle kiss to your clit, “Matty, please.”

“I didn’t peg you for the type to beg,” Matthew hums, pressing feather light kisses around your core. He stopped, gripping your thighs and looking up at you, “You sure about this?”

“Yes, please,” You whine, pussy dripping from Matthew’s hot breath fanning over it. Matthew chuckles darkly, fingers digging into your thighs when he flicked his tongue over your clit. You moan, completely unbothered by the blaring music a floor below you. Matthew didn’t seem to be bothered either, his tongue teasing your entrance while his nose rubbed against your clit, living for the way you were whimpering above him, “Matty-”

“Close baby?” Matthew groans, slipping a finger inside of you and curling it. You back arched, his name falling through your lips was enough to answer his question. Your legs shook, pleasure washing over your body from Matthew and all of it just felt so right. Matthew’s lips were latched to your skin until he finally met your eyes again. He smiles softly, nudging his nose with yours while you caught your breath, “So good for me.”

“Should’ve known you were that good with your mouth with the way you run it,” You tease smiling against his lips.

“Not with you, not anymore,” Matthew promises, soft blue eyes looking into yours, he meant it. He didn’t know how else to make it clearer, he wanted you. You kissed him slowly, hands trailing down his abs and stopping where his shorts hit his waist. Matthew kicks off his swim trunks, cock springing free. You grab the back of his neck, pulling your lips to his and rolling over top of him and straddling his waist. It was criminal how good you looked on top of him, “Gonna ride me babe?”

You nod, lining his dick up your core and lowering yourself on top of him. You let out a whine, Matthew’s smug smile on full display once he realized it was because of how big he was, “We don’t have to if my dick’s too big.”

“Oh shut up,” You roll your hips, watching the way Matthew’s head fell back, smirking because he really thought he had control here. Matthew’s hands gripped your waist, moving your hips faster. His finger flicked over your clit, causing you to lunge forward on top of him. Matthew flipped you over, wrapping a leg around his waist so he could hit your g-spot. Your hands gripped his shoulders, nails leaving scratches Matthew was going to wear pride later. You were seeing stars, noises leaving your throat you’d never even heard yourself make, “Fuck, Matty, I’m gonna cum again.”

“Look at me,” Matthew grabs your chin, pressing his forehead against yours and watching while your eyes roll back with pleasure. Your pussy clenched around him, his own cum spilling into you from the sensation, a loud groan following. Matthew pressed a kiss to your forehead, his cock still buried inside of you, “I wasn’t bullshitting you, I mean every word Y/N.”

“Matthew,” You whisper, running a finger along his back, “The distance…”

You didn’t mention everything, the way that if this was real it meant it would end up ripping you both apart. You were set to live in a different city, Matthew all the way in another country. The way your dreams included a spot on the U.S. National team, and the idea that wanting to be with Matthew would hold you back was terrifying. The way his dreams probably meant staying in Calgary forever, a C on his jersey and a cup over his head. It wasn’t going to be easy, you weren’t ever going to be the doting girlfriend he probably needed. There would be years of travel schedules and games that overlapped, and a part of you thought that maybe Matthew wouldn’t be able to do it. You’d get a year in and he’d find someone who would be there more and finally you’d end it.

“We can make it work, baby I want you, I always have and I probably always will,” Matthew starts, baring his soul to another person for the first time in his goddamn life, “I want to support your dreams and have you be there for mine. I’m all in here, I don’t know how else to tell you.”

“Can I have some time?” You plead, holding onto Matthew’s shoulders because you knew he could leave and tell you to never speak to him again. Matthew sighs, understanding the way you were shitting yourself about starting your own professional career, remembering the way rookie Matthew would have died before he considered settling down that first year, “Please don’t leave me-”

“I’m not going anywhere,” Matthew promises, rolling over and letting your rest on his chest, “I’ll wait for you.”

You smile, snuggling closer to him. Matthew didn’t sleep a minute that night, running every single scenario that could possibly happen with the two of you. Matthew was sure it would work out, it had to, because if it didn’t he wasn’t sure he’d be able to recover.

So now all he could was wait.

***

You know this is creepy right?

Matthew stares at Sam, punching his teammate in the arm lightly and telling him to shut up. He had a night off in Chicago, and after four straight hours of staring at your contact in his phone, Matthew finally just bought the tickets. He’d been good at keeping his distance, you needed space and he respected you enough to try and give it to you. He wasn’t doing so hot, Matthew consuming more soccer games than hockey games at this point. It started with your first game, because how was he supposed to just pretend like it wasn’t happening? You scored too, and it took everything in his power not to call you to tell you that not only was he right, he was insanely proud of you.

And he’d been hearing it from everyone. Your sister thought it was bullshit, Taryn and Jamie almost had Matthew on a flight to Chicago ready to show up like a terrible Lifetime movie. Brady thought it was hilarious the way Matthew was simping like this for one girl. Now, his teammates were on him, wondering why on Earth their friend who historically ran through women faster than he did mouthguards could be this hung up on someone he had a crush on in middle school.

“What number is she?” Sam asks, sipping the beer he forced Matthew to buy after making him go along with this.

“Nineteen,” Matthew smiles, pointing down at you on the field. You looked so happy, warming up with one of your teammates and a bright smile on your face. It seemed like a good fit, your team and your new city, and it made Matthew’s heart grow four sizes.

“Did she choose your number?” Sam jokes and Matthew mumbles something under his breath, “What?”

“It was her number first,” Matthew admits, not wanting to ever confess to another soul that you crossed his mind when he kept that camp number. Sam howled next to him, leaning over his seat and cracking up at his teammate.

You looked out in the crowd about halfway through the game, rubbing your eyes to make sure you weren’t seeing things. That tuft of curls was hard to miss, not to mention you knew just how big Matthew was. He was far too into the game to realize you caught him, up in arms about a call against your team that was valid but he’d argue it wasn’t. You asked for space, and it was getting harder to stick to your guns. Especially when he was making it so clear that he wanted this.

And whether or not you went to his game the next night, was a secret you’d take to the grave.

***

You were so close you could have tasted it.

While the final seconds of your season came to a close, all you could do was hold your head in your hands and hope no one caught the tears. A semi-final loss was devastating, but a semi-final loss where there wasn’t anything you could have done differently was even worse. Every athlete had off nights, a point Keith pushed right before you left to start your season, and he was right. Unfortunately, that was this game. Your biggest fear had come true and there was nothing you could do about it now. The game was over and you weren’t moving on.

And Matthew watched it.

Matthew promised you space, and he swore he’d give you the time you needed to settle down. But, this was something he couldn’t ignore. He could tell you were off, your entire rookie season was almost perfect and watching the way you folded during this game was gut wrenching. Matthew knew better than anyone, losing sucked. So he took the chance, grabbing his phone and shooting you a text he’d been waiting to send.

Doors open in Calgary.

and I’m so fucking proud of you.

It was the very last text you saw before you went to bed that night, tossing and turning for a few hours thinking about that loss. You couldn’t stop, every bone in your body was aching and you didn’t know what to do. So you bought a flight, packed your shit and was walking down the hallway to Matthew’s apartment without a second thought. You’d left him on read, calling Brady in the middle of the night and asking for his address, who gave it to you reluctantly with a reminder that if you needed to see him this badly you should rethink the needing time thing.

Matthew let out a groan when he had a bang at his door at three in the morning. Noah definitely was trying to walk into the wrong apartment again, and Matthew was grouchy when he whipped his door open. Except it wasn’t Noah after he’d had too many. It was you, teary eyed with your shit in a suitcase and a broken heart.

“I can’t stop thinking about it,” You admit, whispering something you never thought you’d say to anyone, “I just didn’t do enough-”

Matthew didn’t say a word, pulling you into a bone crushing hug and holding you as tightly as he could. You didn’t need to hear it from him, about how things were out of your control and you did your best. You didn’t want that right now, you wanted him, “Baby…”

“Everything hurts,” You whimper, finally just letting it all out. You were bruised and battered from the season, the physical pain alone was enough to upset you, let alone the loss you just took. Matthew carded his fingers through your hair, letting you soak his bare chest with your tears because he wouldn’t have it any other way. You came back to him. You came back to him when things got too tough because you trusted him to bring you some peace, and he was happy about it.

You passed out sometime after that, your tears finally running dry and the exchaustion taking over your body. Matthew woke up early the next day, grateful for the optional morning skate so he could stay with you for just a little bit longer. The sun was just starting to peek through the curtains in his room, a calm snowy morning in Calgary so the city was just a bit quieter.

Matthew settled on breakfast, working away in his kitchen with the only thing he knew how to make. Tell her you made it, his mom’s words from just a few months prior in his head while he cooked. You padded out his bedroom, one of Matthew’s god awful beer shirts hanging from your frame while you wrapped your arms around his waist and pressed a kiss into his back, “It’s cold here.”

“You’ll get used to it,” Matthew hums, internally pumping his fist when he felt your lips form a smile against his skin. You turned your head, pressing your cheek against his against and letting out a laugh, “What’s so funny?”

“You framed my jersey?” You ask, your eye catching a jersey that was way too familiar. It was hung up beside Matthew’s from his first all star game, both number nineteens staring back at you.

“Why wouldn’t I? You’re my favorite player,” Matthew hums, a blush covering his cheeks, “I’m so proud of you.”

“You keep saying that,” Matthew finally turns around, pressing a quick peck to your lips.

“I’ll keep saying it long after we both retire,” Matthew speaks, words clear and sure because he’s had plenty of time to practice this one, “I’ll say it when you win a World Cup gold, I’ll say it when we have kids, I’ll say when you play at the Olympics. I’m going to say it over and over again.”

“But…” You trail off, all of those same demons you’d been fighting when it came to your whatever this was with Matthew, “What I’m not around enough for you?”

Matthew knew what you were thinking about, he’d thought about it plenty too. There were countless sleepless nights where all he did was wonder if you’d find someone in Chicago who could support you better than he could. He’d do his best, he swore he would, but in order for you to be happy, your passion came first. There was always going to be times when he couldn’t be there and it killed him.

“You’re more than enough,” Matthew promises, his lips ghosting over yours, “I want you to seize every opportunity in the world, I just want to be there to tell you that I love you and use the goat emoji on Instagram when you do.”

You let out a laugh, Matthew’s smile wide enough to see his dimples you loved so much, “I think I want to stay a little while.”

“I think you should,” Matthew agrees, capturing your lips in his, “Besides I’m playing tonight and I think I need to show off now.”

“You’re a cocky asshole.”

“But now I’m your cocky asshole.”

***

One year Later

You had a good reason to be late.

You swore Matthew couldn’t possibly be mad at you for this one. You’d missed your flight to Calgary, a few days post a second loss in the semi finals that you’d been taking much better this time around. Mainly because Matthew wasn’t there, but his stupid smile and words of encouragement where there on facetime hours later. That wasn’t the reason you were late, the reason you were late was because you’d received the most insane news of your life and it was an important phone or that flight. You’d caught the next one, legs shaking not to just call him and share the news, but you needed to tell him in person.

You’d finally gotten by the doors to the locker room entrance, out of breath from spriting there from your cab. There was Matthew, tapping his phone and staring at the clock on his phone with furrowed eyebrows. He was still in his suit, tie pulled a little looser, a nervous habit you realized he had some time ago, “Matty-”

“Don’t call me that just because you know you’re late,” Matthew huffs, already ready for the pout that would have followed so he’d forget all about the fact that you promised you’d make it on time. He holds his hand out, waiting for the handshake he made up in the car on the way to the first game you went to after he finally locked it down. You laugh, slapping your hand against his and letting him pull you closer for a kiss.

“They want me on the National Team,” You mumble against his lips, the words spilling out of your mouth when you pull away with an excited smile. Matthew stood there stunned, while you shuffled your feet in the little dance you did when you were really happy. He grabs your cheeks, pressing kisses to your lips again and again.

“We’re celebrating after this, holy shit,” Matthew cheers, still stunned by your news, “I love you so much.”

“I love you too, now go score a few goals so we have even more to celebrate,” You kiss him one more time, pushing him before the door before he was late.

“Anything I do seems unimportant now!” Matthew calls out, a light laugh to his voice as he watched you walk away to go sit in the stands.

And that’s how Matthew thought it should be.

#matthew tkachuk #matthew tkachuk imagine #my writing #nhl imagine #nhl imagines

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sagurus · 3 years

Text

Regarding a Common Misconception of Hakuba Saguru

Lately I've been doing some reflecting on Saguru & the various ways I've seen him portrayed, as well as the ways I've portrayed him in the past. And then I was rereading some MK manga, and had some realizations. I've been feeling like rambling about them! So here I go, rambling.

[Disclaimer: I'm not personally taking issue with anyone's interpretation or impression of Saguru - just sharing my own impressions! This is just for fun <3 ]

Misconception: Saguru is constantly accusing Kaito of being KID

It’s a generally accepted fact in a lot of fics I’ve read (and honestly, maybe some fics I’ve written -- I used to hold this belief too!) that Saguru just unendingly insinuates that Kaito is KID--alone, in front of other people, always.

I won’t cite any here, but I’ve seen nods in fanwork to Aoko feeling a little stressed/frustrated about the fact that Saguru thinks Kaito is KID and makes it known. I’ve also seen fanwork where Saguru explicitly calls Kaito KID, presses Kaito for information, or otherwise makes his beliefs clear, even when others are around.

There are only five scenes in the Magic Kaito manga where Saguru makes direct indication toward his knowledge of KID’s identity.

First, of course, we’ve got chapter 17 - the first chapter where Saguru puts together that Kaito is KID.

For a long time, when I’d consumed more fic than MK canon, I recall an image born in my head of Saguru singling Kaito out in class and making the claim that Kaito is KID in front of everybody. I don’t know if I ever read any such allusion in a fic, or if it’s just an assumption I drew based on portrayals I read, but imagine my surprise when he does nothing of the sort.

Now, to be fair, Saguru is A LOT in this chapter. MK is still heavily in gag manga territory, so his behavior is extra extra played up. But if we take away the visuals, the dialogue between Saguru and Kaito can be summed up thusly:

[First scene where Saguru makes direct indications as to KID’s identity]

Kaito: You look so tired. Haven’t gotten enough sleep after chasing KID for three nights In a row, huh?

Saguru: Hmph. Aren’t you tired as well?

And then, a few beats later in the conversation:

Saguru: I’d like to invite you to the Ochima Art Museum tonight, where KID’s declared his next target. Kaito: Eh? Saguru: Then, you’ll understand why I’m so tired. Or, do you have other plans tonight? Kaito: Okay, I accept your invitation. It’ll be great to see your work in action!

And that’s it, that’s the big class confrontation. Aoko is present for it, but she’s more interested in joining in on the fun, and while I do think Aoko pieces together that Kaito is KID, she prefers to live in willful ignorance of it until it becomes impossible for her to ignore. She’s bright enough to pick up what Saguru’s implying, but because he never brings it past implication, there’s no reason for her to look at it too hard. Anyway, I digress. That’s conjecture and headcanon talking. My point is that Saguru never makes any explicit claims, just invites Kaito along to the heist.

Another neat thing about this scene is that--while certainly not motivated by mercy in this case, Saguru does give Kaito an out: “Or, do you have an excuse not to go tonight?” Of course, if Kaito took it, it would be rather damning, but I do think it would have been enough confirmation for Saguru. I don’t think there would have been any arm-twisting to get Kaito to agree.

But Kaito and Saguru are competitive bastards, so here we are.

Let’s move on to the heist!

Once again, the manga certainly plays up the whole ordeal. Saguru is intense and waiting for his moment, and Kaito’s being, well, Kaito.

At the heist, there are a few points where Saguru has opportunities to make allusions to Kaito being KID in a way others would pick up on, or otherwise make his suspicions known, but he doesn’t.

First of all, is this exchange:

Nakamori: Why are you guys here? Aoko: Hakuba-kun invited us! Nakamori: What’s the meaning of this, Hakuba-kun? Saguru: I thought she might like to see if KID is arrested tonight. Nakamori: You’ll fail if you’re too cocky! Saguru: We’re well-prepared. Besides, who knows… KID may already be here.

Saguru does imply KID could be present, but he makes no indication that he means Kaito. His next opportunity to hint at Kaito being KID or otherwise make accusations is when Nakamori asks him to consult as a magician.

Nakamori: Kaito, since you’re here, do you want to use your magic against KID? Kaito: [laughing sheepishly] Saguru: Oh, I want to see that fight, too. If you really can do it.

Needling, yes. Saguru knows what he’s saying and so does Kaito. Accusations, no. This is well within the realm of something Saguru would have said even if he didn’t suspect Kaito, considering their dynamic up until this point.

And then, the most explicit Saguru ever gets in terms of literally calling Kaito out as being KID, beginning when Kaito excuses himself to go to the bathroom right before the heist:

[Second scene where Saguru makes direct indications as to KID’s identity]

Saguru: [handcuffs himself to Kaito] Kaito: Huh? Saguru: I won’t let you do that, Kuroba. Kaito: What do you think you’re doing?! Saguru: I got the report back from the lab. The hair I got from KID indicated that he’s a high school student. After I compared KID’s data with other high school students’ data in the database… Kuroba Kaito came up in the final list. Kaito: That’s a coincidence. Saguru: Really? We’ll see soon enough. Let’s wait until the time KID is stated to come. [Some heist hubbub occurs as officers get into position even though KID hasn’t arrived at the heist time] Aoko: What? KID’s not coming? Saguru: Ha! It looks like I win! You’d better confess who you really are.

And from there, of course, ‘KID’ (Akako in disguise) swoops in and takes care of the heist. That more or less wraps up chapter 17, the first chapter where Saguru understands that Kaito is KID. And I would argue this is the most aggressive Saguru ever is. In fact, rather than persist in trying to accuse/capture/implicate Kaito as KID, he straight up vanishes from the narrative for several chapters.

Saguru doesn’t show up again until the Chat Noir heist, in chapter 25, when he calls from France.

It’s also important to note that at this point, Magic Kaito’s narrative has experienced a slight tonal shift. At the very least, while still often comedic, it reads less like a gag manga. Between the last time we saw Saguru and now, we’ve learned the apparent motivation behind Toichi’s murder, we’ve met Snake (an albeit rather incompetent villain) and Kaito has faced down gunfire and the danger posed by Snake and his men.

The way Saguru is portrayed has also shifted to reflect the shift too. Instead of a hulking antagonist-like character in a Holmes cosplay, he’s dressed primly and presents more as a cheeky but polite character. He’s also more effectively emulating the charm that the story tried to imply he had early on (“Hakuba Saguru, at your service!”, the girls in class fawning over him, the newspaper calling him out as a famous detective making a long-awaited return to Japan).

The interaction is entirely less antagonistic, too. For reference, I’ll paste the exchange (sans Saguru’s massive info dump) below.

[Third scene where Saguru makes direct indications as to KID’s identity]

[At the heist for the golden eye] Kaito: [Hiding in a bathroom stall while putting on a disguise] [His phone starts ringing] Hello…? Saguru: Hi, it’s been a while. Are you still alive? Kaito: [Thinking] This sugary yet obnoxious tone of voice is... Hakuba?! Saguru: You’ve made quite the stir in Paris. They’re all talking about how France’s Chat Noir is going to go up against you in Japan. Kaito: Idiot! It’s not me. It’s Kaitou KID! Saguru: Ha… it doesn’t really matter. I’ll share some information that I gathered over here. [Info dump cut from dialogue] Well! That’s about all I have to say. Do your best. I don’t want to see you lose to anyone until I capture you myself. Kaito: Like I’ve been saying, I’m not KID! Saguru: Oops, it’s almost time for the Paris Fashion Week. See you! Kaito: H-hey…

The only part of this conversation that I could consider to fall into the territory of antagonistic is when Saguru says “I don’t want to see you lose to anyone until I capture you myself.” And more than anything, I think this is less reflective of a real desire to capture Kaito, and more reflective of his competitive nature. Not to mention, within the context of the conversation, it feels much more like teasing than anything.

Saguru’s motivation for making the call is clear: He doesn’t want Kaito to lose, and he wants to help ensure Kaito’s success.

And most interestingly (although I’d like to see the raw manga to confirm this, or otherwise a more literal translation) he never explicitly calls Kaito KID either. Outside of alluding to KID’s actions, Saguru doesn’t explicitly say Kaito is KID or mention KID at all. It’s Kaito who does that.

When Kaito points out that he is not, in fact, KID, Saguru doesn’t argue. He simply brushes off the denial and shares the information he’s collected.

So, to summarize what we’ve covered so far: after Saguru failed to arrest Kaito during chapter 17, he stopped troubling Kaito so thoroughly that the next time he features in the story isn’t until he’s calling from overseas to try to lend Kaito some helpful information. He’s not even playing a part in trying to capture this thief he allegedly wants to catch.

And then, Saguru dips back out of the narrative, although for a shorter period this time. The next arc he appears in is a few chapters later--the Nightmare Heist which he arrives in the middle of. But, there’s not any interaction between him and Kaito, nor any allusions made by Saguru about KID’s identity, so we’ll move on.

The fourth time Saguru makes any indication that Kaito is KID is during the Corbeau arc, when KID is being challenged by a clad-in-black KID lookalike.

Before jumping into that specific scene, though, there’s another interaction I’d like to call attention to--between Saguru and Nakamori. Not because of something Saguru says, but because of what he doesn’t say.

Nakamori: Hahaha! Looks like you let your guard down because you thought I was at home with a cold! Saguru: Our plan succeeded, it seems. Nakamori: But I only told Aoko I had a cold, so how does KID know…? Saguru: Hm...

If Saguru were wanting to make some kind of accusation, even a non-explicit one, he would have made some remark. Instead, he doesn’t say anything at all, which continues to speak to the fact that he isn’t really interested in implicating Kaito.

Anyway, the next time Saguru makes any sort of implication that Kaito is KID he is, once again, trying to help. Last time it was over the phone, so the conversation was private. This time, the conversation is in a classroom, although based on the panels, it seems like Saguru and Kaito are alone at the beginning--or at least, no attention is being paid to them.

[Fourth scene where Saguru makes direct indications as to KID’s identity]

Kaito: [Talking to himself] It must be the case, there’s no other way. There must have been some trick with the case.

Saguru: [Eavesdropping, apparently alone in the room with him] The case didn’t contain any hidden mechanisms. Kaito: Eh? Saguru: No hidden doors or things like that, as are often used in magic tricks. Kaito: W-what on earth are you talking about? Saguru: A new notice from Corbeau arrived this morning. ‘I’ll come and take the real Midnight Crow tonight.’ My name is Hakuba--so I don’t want a ‘white’ person to lose to some ominous black crow. [From here, Akako and then Aoko jump into the conversation.]

Surely a classroom is a risky place to have a conversation about KID, but the nice thing is that Saguru--once again--doesn’t bring up KID at all beyond saying that he doesn’t want the ‘white[-clad] person’ to lose to the black crow. From the outside looking in, all he’s doing is sharing information about the case with Kaito. It may also seem unwarranted from that perspective, but not at all implicating.

Also, another thing I’d like to call attention to is that when Akako joins the conversation (and seemingly blindsides Saguru, as if he wasn’t expecting anyone else to join), Saguru stops talking. He continues to be quiet when Aoko chimes in, and he doesn’t have any relevant dialogue for the rest of the scene.

Once again, Saguru’s clearly motivated to share information in the interest of helping Kaito. He has to share with Kaito’s civilian identity, since he can’t exactly arrange a conversation with KID, and this is likely the easiest way for him to do it. He makes no accusations, and this time he doesn’t even imply he wants KID caught.

So--Saguru is a part of the narrative again, but since rejoining the narrative he seems less interested in actually catching KID and far more interested in helping Kaito. And no accusations or incriminating allusions have been made since chapter 17, before Saguru’s first hiatus from the story.

The final time Saguru nods to Kaito being KID is from the Sun Halo arc. This is probably the interaction that’s closest to what fanon tends to depict when it comes to Saguru making subtle accusations that Kaito is KID. And even then, I tend to take this arc with a grain of salt if only because it felt less like Gosho was trying to add to the story and more like he was just trying to make a Magic Kaito addition that hit various fan expectations while still being wildly disappointing, lmao.

[Fifth scene where Saguru makes direct indications as to KID’s identity]

Saguru: [approaching and commenting on Kaito’s motorcycle] I see, a Suzuki GSX 250R. Akako: Ah, Hakuba-kun… Saguru: You’ve shown me something interesting. Perhaps this might help the police tonight. And could it be that you’ve forgotten… that the only motorised bikes we’re allowed to ride to school are scooters? Kaito: Eh?! For real?!

Once again, Saguru doesn’t explicitly mention KID at all--and segues from his mention of the police to pointing out that Kaito is breaking the rules right now, actually, which helps blend this teasing comment into the conversation.

Yes, later in the chapter Saguru does show up with a team of motorcycle experts. But that also means there’s more disguise opportunities for KID and more factors to account for, thus complicating things for, well, everyone--not just KID.

Also, I tend to dismiss that as Gosho throwing in some comedy, and as less to do with Saguru’s character. Call it cherrypicking if you like :P

To recount--there are five times where Saguru implies Kaito is KID.

The first two are in chapter 17, when Saguru first puts it together, and it is during this chapter that he gets the most explicit about calling Kaito out as KID, as well as the most aggressively he behaves about it. And he backs off so hard after that doesn’t work, that we don’t see him for several chapters.

The next two times he implies Kaito is KID are both in order to help him. No aggression or accusations, just the sharing of information. Even when teasing or suggesting he’s interested in catching KID, he’s good-natured about it, and when he realizes there are potentially people witnessing the conversation, he stops participating.

The final time he implies Kaito is KID is a tiny comment about finding something Kaito has shown him ‘interesting’ and ‘helpful for the police’ before smoothing into gently teasing Kaito for bringing an illegal vehicle to school.

In conclusion, Saguru may start off apparently aggressive in part thanks to early Magic Kaito’s overall tone, but rather than persevering in trying to catch Kaito after cornering him in chapter 17, he actually seems to back off. Once he’s playing a part in the narrative again, when he interacts with Kaito it’s almost exclusively to help him. Yes, he is on the task force and participating at heists, but where it matters, he’s less interested in catching the thief and far more interested in those the thief is opposing (excluding the police force).

#hakuba saguru #saguru hakuba #dcmk #magic kaito #meta #nefrit talk

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sevlgi · 3 years

Text

hit and run

requested: no

group: blackpink

pairing: rosé x fem!reader

genre: a shit ton of angst, some fluff

contents: idol!rosé, actress!y/n, closeted!rosé, costar!au, slight enemies-to-lovers, unhappy endings because i’m a bitch, a lot of attempted cinematic parallels, italicized dialogue is when they’re speaking as their characters

warnings: slight homophobia

synopsis: There’s absolutely no reason for you to get involved with a costar who you should hate by all accounts. But of course, you manage to forget that love is usually more like a hit-and-run than a cruise ship.

a/n: while i was writing this, i imagined this as what happened before rosie sang “gone”, so maybe you can think of it like that too? i’m honestly so terrified of this flopping lmao...

for a little background on the film: Y/N plays Luna, a pirate captain who unknowingly sacrificed her family in order to have the power to fight the regime that Rosé’s character Helen is a part of. Helen approaches Luna, determined to help her bring justice, but Helen is unable to choose between the benefits of staying with the regime, and following what she knows is right and destroying her life as a result.

word count: 6.8k

The last thing you want to hear on the morning of your first script reading is that the actress playing your love interest in the film has changed.

“What?” you say loudly, straightening in the backseat. Your manager frowns, and you sit obediently, but the scowl doesn’t leave your face. “What do you mean the actress changed?”

“Yeah. She had to leave the movie at the last minute,” he sighs.

Sooyoung was chosen alongside you, after lengthy interviews testing whether the two of you would be able to handle your characters’ dynamic. It took weeks for the director to decide that you were the pair that she wanted, so the news that you’ll be meeting your costar for the first time in front of paparazzi is quite the shock to your system. “Shit. Then who’s the replacement?”

Your manager presses his lips together firmly before answering, “Park Chaeyoung. She’s an idol.”

You groan and slump down again. “Great. Another idol actress? Please don’t tell me that this is her first role too. Oh god, is she straight?”

“Yes to all of the above,” Chan says tensely.

Maybe you’re being dramatic, but it’s honestly a big deal. It’s the first leading role you’ve bagged, especially in a mainstream LGBTQ+ movie, and Sooyoung was the best costar you could’ve picked. You’ve never met Park Chaeyoung before, and you already know that all your plans are going to be messed up.

Chan pulls the car into the parking lot, and you scowl when you realize that most of the paparazzi have arrived. “We’re going around the back. Y/N, promise me one thing: don’t make a scene, okay?” your manager pleads. “I’m not happy about it either, but Chaeyoung has a good reputation. You’ll just ruin yours if you blow up at her.”

“I promise,” you answer through gritted teeth. You slip through the open side door as soon as you get out of the car, ignoring Chan’s call after you to have a good time like you would’ve.

To make matters worse, you don’t even get a chance to talk to the director or Chaeyoung before you’re swarmed by a crowd of reporters, even if that ‘talk’ would’ve consisted of more yelling than anything. “Y/N, Y/N!”

“Okay, let her up!” Seulgi shouts, pushing her way through. She grips your arm to lead you towards the cast table, whispering under her breath, “I’ll explain later. But just run with it, okay?”

You have plenty of problems with idol actresses, but you’ve never been inclined to say all those problems to their faces. Until now, that is. Now, you’re sitting shoulder-to-shoulder with a girl you know has absolutely no credentials to be playing the other role in your upcoming movie, resisting the urge to ball your script up and throw it in her face.

There’s nothing wrong with Park Chaeyoung as a person-- she’s admittedly gorgeous, probably sweet, and you’re sure she isn’t a bad actress in any sense. The only thing wrong with the situation is that she’s painfully straight and auditioning to be your love interest in what might be Korea’s first mainstream lesbian film, and that you have never spoken to her before.

Chaeyoung avoids your stare with a clenched jaw, and in normal circumstances, you would already be apologizing profusely for making her uncomfortable. In this circumstance, though, your obvious grudge against her only contributes to the dynamic her character is supposed to have with yours.

“Miss Kang, is it true that the actors were only picked today?”

The director grimaces, and the both of you turn to look at the cameras flashing by the sides of the room. It was never the plan to allow paparazzi to sit in on the first reading that you and Chaeyoung would be doing together, especially since it’s true that Chaeyoung was only chosen hours ago, after the original actress bailed. Even though your grudge should be against the girl who left, it’s easier to glare at the one sitting next to you. “Not exactly. Y/N has been confirmed for the role of Luna for months, but we recently added Chaeyoung as Helen. But we can assure that their chemistry will be wonderful,” Seulgi reassures the audience. What a lie.

Yet another reporter calls out, “How much of the script will we be seeing today, and when will the trailer be released?”

“Since the casting was changed today, the trailer has been delayed,” Seulgi says. You can hear the panic in her voice, and clear your throat. “As for the script… we’re only doing part of one scene that will show up in the trailer today, so we’ll just let them begin. Y/N?”

As you take a sip of water to prepare yourself, you almost hope that Chaeyoung messes up her part. It would be bad press, sure, and it would only contribute to Seulgi’s stress, but it would be satisfying for her to realize that she doesn’t deserve her part. She’s just an idol, after all, and she’s taking away representation from the people who need it.

“Are you saying you’re better than me?” you begin, your voice ice-cold.

You watch Chaeyoung’s throat bob, but her voice is steady and clear when she says her line. “No! I’m not saying that I’m better than you… but by all accounts, there’s no way you should have this power.”

“Would you be less scared then?” You pause, watch as Chaeyoung’s expression changes to the panic that her character’s would. “I’m kidding, Helen. I did things to get these powers, things that I’m not proud of.”

“Why would you do that? You’re strong… you don’t need them.”

“I’ve never been-- shit.” The tips of your ears start to burn, and suddenly, your lines are swimming before your eyes. Maybe all your hoping and wishing that Chaeyoung messes up has reflected onto you instead.

She attempts to remind you, “I haven’t always--”

“I know,” you hiss, but your voice is too loud in the silent room. Chaeyoung turns bright pink, too, but you still can’t seem to say your lines out loud. Shit, shit, shit--

“I’m just trying to help,” she sighs.

You whip your head to glare at her, and she winces at the daggers you send in her direction. “Shut the hell up--”

“Okay, the script reading will end here,” Seulgi announces loudly, and you bite down hard on your tongue. You don’t dare to look at the other cast members, don’t dare to think about how they must be guilting you for cutting their PR short. “Thank you everyone, please leave with security.”

You stay in your seat, staring at your script with burning eyes until you feel a hand on your shoulder and jolt. “Hey,” Chaeyoung reminds you, “we can leave.”

“Don’t touch me” is your only answer, and you storm out of the room. Alone.

The next time you see Chaeyoung is the next day, at a script-reading that the paparazzi knows nothing about. (You do see a friend request from a Park Chaeyoung the night before, but you ignore it.)

Seulgi attempts a smile, but it doesn’t hide the bags under her eyes. She claps and raises her voice to get the cast’s attention. “Okay, everyone. We didn’t get what we wanted yesterday, but that’s fine. Um… let’s try yesterday’s scene from Chaeyoung’s part, okay? From ‘you don’t need them’.”

Chaeyoung nods. “You’re strong… you don’t need them,” she starts, worry tinging into her voice.

“I haven’t always been strong,” you reply, your voice harsher than it should be just to stop yourself from messing up again.

“Still. Powers aren’t everything, Luna, it’s too hard to have them.”

You sigh. “Newsflash, princess. It’s harder not to.”

“But--” Chaeyoung interjects.

“Did you ever think,” you cut her off, “that I didn’t care that it’d be hard? Did you ever think that the rest of us are tired of you abusing the thing that you’re given, but we have to fight for?”

You look right to Seulgi once you finish, ignoring the part underneath that says you should look to Chaeyoung at the end of the scene. The director smiles anyway. “That was great, you two. I think you capture the tension perfectly, which is a relief.”

You fight the urge to laugh. “I know that changing our main cast so close to the actual production is really difficult,” Seulgi sighs. “And I’m really sorry to inconvenience you all. The schedule is really squished now, and we just have to work through it. Chaeyoung, Y/N, all I ask is that you try to work together, okay? I know you’ll be amazing together.”

Chaeyoung speaks, possibly for the first time besides her lines. “Of course, Ms. Bae. I’ll do my best.”

“I’m sure. We have to cut this short, again, but we’re scheduled for costume fitting right now,” Seulgi groans. “We have to at least get the outfits for the trailer to fit. Sorry, everyone. Down the hall, okay?”

Of course, you and Chaeyoung have to get fit together. The only sound in the hallway is that of her heels clicking on the wood, and you resist the urge to shout at her to stop. Luckily, you arrive in the fitting room before you can.

Your eyes widen at the dress hanging there. It’s incredible, even without the layers that would support the skirt-- you can’t even imagine how the beading and pink silk would look on Chaeyoung. Ethereal, probably. “Y/N, yours is here,” the costume director laughs, beckoning you over.

Even though your own outfit isn’t nearly as opulent, you can’t help but admire the gold detailing on the cuffs and the tailoring. “Thank god yours doesn’t take so much sewing,” the director grunts, pinning the side. “You know, the two of you are going to look fantastic in these, even if we have to spill all that blood on them to shoot the trailer.”

“Sooyoung would’ve looked better.” It’s mean, and it’s a low blow, but the director doesn’t take your bait.

She pokes her head out to where Chaeyoung’s being fitted. “Now? Okay, Y/N, go out there. We need to take a look at the two of you together.”

You can’t stop your jaw from dropping when you see Chaeyoung. She’s all candyfloss hair and gold adorning her tiny waist, and in all her glory, you can’t stop yourself from thinking that maybe she was made for the role. “You look really good,” she compliments softly.

Nodding stiffly, you turn for the seamstresses. Chaeyoung moves to fiddle with her gloves when she realizes that you have absolutely no interest in continuing the conversation.

Well, if there’s one thing you can nitpick about her, it isn’t how she looks; she looks absolutely perfect for the role of Princess Helen, maybe even more perfect than Sooyoung.

One of the costume directors steps in. “Okay, you can get changed out, but you have to come back in a few hours,” she tells you. “We have to make a lot of changes, then fit you again.”

You step down from the podium, going towards your dressing room without a second thought until Chaeyoung calls for you. “Y/N? Do you want to have lunch later? In your trailer or something?”

“Sure,” you answer, barely glancing back. When you do, all you see is her with shiny puppy eyes, and in her giant gown, it’s eerily similar to the role she’s supposed to be playing.

“It’s nice. You’ve decorated it?”

You nod absentmindedly, clearing the narrow couch off for yourself to sit on, since Chaeyoung has taken the only chair that could fit in the trailer. “Yeah. I mean, I’ve had it for a few months, so.”

She winces. “I’m sorry.”

“For what?” you frown. Chaeyoung apologizes too much, but at least she’s upfront about whatever she has to say.

Your costar sighs, “For usurping the role? You must’ve gotten attached to Sooyoung, and it’s got to be horrible for me to just… arrive like this.”

“You know… that’s part of it.” You can’t lie; a big part of the resentment you hold against Chaeyoung is the fact that she took a role meant for someone else, someone you were friends with. “The other thing… I don’t like idol actresses,” you tell her.

Chaeyoung’s brows furrow, and she leans forward. “Why? I mean, why don’t you?”

You pause to think about it. “Well… I mean, think about it like this. Sooyoung and my auditions went for weeks before we were chosen, as a pair. Didn’t you get this role because you were an idol? You had to audition, sure, but I bet you just flashed a few smiles and read the script and got chosen. How is that fair?”

She opens her mouth to speak, but you hold your hand up and continue, “And the other thing. You’re straight.”

Chaeyoung chokes on air at that, spluttering, “What? You hate me because I’m straight?”

“No,” you say incredulously, “Well, I don’t hate you. But you being straight, and landing the lead role in a film like this… you’re taking away representation. And that’s kind of shitty of you.”

The air inside the trailer becomes suffocating, and Chaeyoung’s fiddling with the jacket in her lap finally stops when she throws it aside and stands up. She sounds like she’s about to cry when she says quietly, “Have you ever considered that I’m not straight? It’s not… it’s not that easy to be out about it--”

“Oh, cry me a river,” you groan. “Look, I apologize for assuming, but if you want to act in lesbian roles, you can’t pretend to be straight. It’s all for your fans, isn’t it? Another part of being an idol--”

She stands up, then storms right out of the trailer without another word, the door banging closed. The only thing you can do in response is sigh and utter a quiet, “Shit”.

Perhaps it’s just your luck that the first proper scene you have to film with Chaeyoung is your culminating kiss scene.

It shouldn’t be in the trailer at all-- according to the scene schedule, the two of you would’ve filmed your scenes together in chronological order, and the kiss would’ve been at the end, hopefully after a reconciliation between the two of you. However, for some inexplicable reason, it’s going to be the first one you do, without a single second of rehearsal.

You’re a one-take wonder, and you always have been, but you can’t help but think about how impossible it’s going to be to pull off such an intense scene with someone you just fought with. Sighing, you lean over to fiddle with your hair; it’s slightly tangled now, and there’s a fake scrape on the side of your cheek.

At a side, Chaeyoung is similarly beat up, fake blood smeared on the left side of her face. Her long hair has been put in an updo and then taken down, and parts of her dress are ripped; to you, she looks more like Helen than herself now.

“Okay, everyone, are we ready? Positions, please!”

You arrange yourself on the ground where you should be, holding a handkerchief to your cheek like instructed as Chaeyoung stands by the camera to run to you. Exhaling sharply, your eyes meet hers for the first time in days. “Action!”

Chaeyoung sprints to you as soon as she’s cued, falling in front of you in a heap. “Luna,” she gasps, reaching a gloved hand out to the ‘injured’ half of your face.

“I’m fine,” you smile weakly. The camera hovers by Chaeyoung’s shoulder, and you soften your gaze as much as possible as your hand comes up to hers.

The other girl only moves closer, her eyes scanning yours and her dress surrounding the both of you like a sea of gauze. Her nose is almost brushing up against yours, and you mutter softly, “Be careful. I don’t want you to do anything you don’t want.”

“Well, what do you want?” Chaeyoung implores, almost inaudible. Her breath quivers, and you feel it when you reach forward to cup her jaw. “Luna, what do you want right now?”

“I’m not making a move until you tell me to,” you shake your head.

The blonde’s hands slip off your face, and she braces herself on your thighs instead. She laughs breathily, “Coward.”

“Your coward, huh?”

Chaeyoung pauses, scraping her teeth across her bottom lip. It’s so quiet that you think you could hear a pin drop, and the torches held up by the crew flicker across her face so naturally. “If you want to be.”

There’s probably another line that comes after, but with Chaeyoung so close to you, it swims blurrily in your mind. So instead, you just lean up, pull her down, and connect your lips.

She plays along, thankfully, stumbling slightly in her character’s eagerness to get a little closer. The only thing you can hear is Chaeyoung’s slight gasp when you let your hands wander down to her waist, and it’s almost scary how absorbed you are in the scene.

“Okay, cut!” Seulgi’s shout breaks you from your trance, and you hold your hands up as if in surrounder. Chaeyoung’s cheeks are red yet again when she sits up, staring anywhere other than you.

Your director hops off her chair to run towards you, a huge grin on her face. “That was perfect,” she shouts. “Y/N, I think you forgot a line? But it worked out amazingly. The one-take wonder, right?”

You grin when she pats you on the shoulder, a little harder than necessary. Apparently, all your worries were for nothing, as you and Chaeyoung stand to monitor your own shot in the screen next to Joohyun.

You can’t even hear all the praise she showers on the two of you, and you pay no attention to all the details she points out that apparently showcase your perfect chemistry with your costar. All you feel is a slight squeeze on your hand, hidden in the mess of fabric by your side.

You jolt awake at the sound of your phone ringing loudly by your side, finding an unknown number as the caller ID. Accepting hesitantly, you greet, “Hello?”

“Y/N? Did Chan give me the right number?”

Oh. It’s Chaeyoung. “Yeah.” You clear your throat in an attempt to sound a little less drowsy, then repeat, “Right number. Why’d you ask Chan?”

“Well, it’s kinda hard to find you when you never accepted my request,” she laughs quietly. “Um, I have to record the OST today, and I was wondering whether you’d want to come watch? Chan said you didn’t really have any scenes later today.”

“Um. Okay. I’ll ask Chan to bring me,” you answer, then hang up. Your head swims slightly, partially due to the fact that you woke up to the piercing sound of your ringtone and partially because you just don’t understand why Chaeyoung’s reaching out again. You should be the one apologizing, after the tangent you went off on, and you highly doubt that your kiss scene doubled as an apology. Of course, you’ll take it.

Your manager is more than pleased to pick you up this time, but thankfully, he doesn’t question you. If he did, he’d probably be the one you shouted at.

The studio is honestly too small for two people, probably hastily set up, but you recognize the recording equipment from a video of Chaeyoung recording one of her group’s songs. And you recognize the girl already standing in the recording booth, waving you over. “Hi,” she smiles, and for all you try, you don’t see a hint of malice.

“Hey,” you mumble, taking a seat. “Uh… I’m sorry.”

“Wow, straightforward,” she tries to joke. “What for?”

You scratch the back of your neck, sighing, “For assuming, for blowing up on you, for… I don’t know, kind of everything. I’m an asshole, even if what I said wasn’t wrong.”

Chaeyoung chuckles, fiddling with the mic. “I mean, I appreciate the apology, but I wasn’t great either. You definitely had some truth behind what you said, even if it was kind of too to the point.”

“I know. You were just trying to apologize and help us become civil, and I kind of ruined it,” you hum. The other girl adjusts the lyric stand as you continue, “But I’m hoping you understand why I had to say what I did?”

“I do,” she agrees. “You’re definitely right that it’s not good representation at all, I just wish you had heard me out.”

You nod uncomfortably, changing the way you sit on the couch just to distract yourself. “So… you’re gay? I’m just asking because I don’t think I’ve ever heard you talk about it, and I’ve seen plenty of your interviews.”

“So you watch my interviews?” Chaeyoung teases. When you scowl, she just smiles, “I can’t say specifically, but I am confused. You said last time that it’s just another part of being an idol, and you’re… you’re right. It’s taboo for idols to be gay, even though Korea’s opening up to it a bit more now. So even though I want to, I don’t think I can ever be out about it.”

“I understand. And I’m sorry,” you say quietly.

She swallows, throat bobbing. “Thank you. Hey, Y/N… would you mind singing with me?”

“What?” You stare up at her incredulously; it’s not like your singing would make the other girl faint on the spot, but you definitely don’t possess an angelic voice like hers, either.

But maybe it’s an olive branch. “Just… can you match this note?” She hums, and you attempt to create the same pitch. “Okay. Can you do the chorus part in that key, while I do it in the main one? We’ll sound better like that,” Chaeyoung offers.

Against your better judgement, you stand, and shuffle into the recording booth next to her. “If this sounds bad, you’re taking the blame,” you warn, and she giggles while twisting the stand so you can see.

You do sound good together, maybe to a level that you would’ve never anticipated.

You know that something’s off when Chan doesn’t wake you up bright and early on your birthday, even if Seulgi already promised that you wouldn’t have to go to work on the day of. After spending many a birthday with him, you’ve already gotten used to him tugging you up just to take you outside and celebrate somehow.

You know something’s especially off when you hear a female voice cursing from your kitchen, and smell something burning.

“Who the shit-- Chaeyoung?”

The girl turns in surprise, caught red-handed with a piece of burnt toast pinched between her fingers. “Um. Hi?” she offers weakly.

Suddenly self-conscious, you cross your arms over the faded sweatshirt you wear. In your own apartment, Chaeyoung is leagues more put-together in the summery dress she wears, her dyed hair tossed in a braid and glitter shining at the corners of her eyes. “Hello?”

“Chan said you wouldn’t be awake for a few hours,” she sighs, shaking her head as she tosses the toast in the trash. “And I wasn’t supposed to burn the toast.”

“What were you supposed to do?” you question, stepping closer. There’s a cake box on the counter, as well as a couple suspicious tubes of icing right by it, and you think you know what’s going on.

Chaeyoung huffs out an exasperated breath. “I was supposed to surprise you. Chan has something going on at home, so he sent me to supervise your birthday instead. Obviously, I messed that up.”

“It’s fine,” you shrug, taking a seat at the counter and reaching for the icing. “I’ve always wanted to decorate a cake anyway.”

She looks surprised at that, but a smile breaks out across her face. “Really?”

“Really,” you confirm. It’s partially a lie, but you’re decently sure that Chaeyoung will refuse to let you do most of the work anyways. “Uh. I’ll just change first, and then we can get that going?”

“Yeah,” she grins, and you take it as your cue to scurry off to the bedroom.

By the time you come back, there’s a plate of not-burnt toast on your counter, and Chaeyoung’s pouring out two glasses of the juice that you can never bring yourself to buy because of the price tag. “I hope you like it, this is one of my favorites.”

“Like it? I love this,” you gasp, surging forward to pick up one of the glasses. “It’s expensive as hell, though.”

“Well, I couldn’t get you a gift, so I thought a nice morning would suffice,” Chaeyoung laughs. She unties the bow on the cake box to reveal a completely bare vanilla cake, a few packets of sprinkles that you hadn’t noticed now lying next to it. “Do you want to start?”

“Oh, sure.” You choose the blue icing after a bit of debating, and pick up the spatula that your costar offers you. “You didn’t have to, though, I would’ve been okay on my own today.”

Chaeyoung shrugs, “I mean, I didn’t have anything else to do, and I wouldn’t like to be alone on my birthday.”

“How do you usually celebrate?” you question, glancing up at her.

She pauses to think, then answers, “Well, I do live with my members, so we’ll get something to eat. Sometimes, we’re on vacation, so we just do what we can, but I like staying in the dorm to receive the things that their families send me.”

“It sounds sweet.”

“It is,” she grins. “I honestly don’t know what I would do on my own, it seems lonely-- Oh. I’m sorry.”

“What for? It is kind of lonely,” you admit, squeezing a glob of icing out. It’s definitely not as graceful as you would’ve appreciated, and you catch Chaeyoung stifling a laugh. “Chan lived with me at the beginning, but he eventually moved out when I got a girlfriend. Obviously, that didn’t laugh.”

“Sorry,” the other girl repeats again, and you wave a hand out. “When was that?”

“She moved out two years ago,” you answer. “And I’ve been alone since. Or, lonely, not always alone.”

Chaeyoung nods just so that you know she heard you. She accepts the icing tube when you hand it to her, making a spiral that’s infuriatingly better than yours. “How about you? I know you said you aren’t out, but have you dated yet?” you question.

She shakes her head, admitting, “Not yet. I don’t really know how to, you know? You assumed I was straight when you first saw me, so I think everyone else does too.”

“Sorry,” you say, an echo of her.

Your costar doesn’t respond, only setting the spatula down once the basic blue icing is smooth. “I think we’re supposed to refrigerate this before decorating, right?”

You grimace. “Well, I don’t know. I stopped watching cake videos years ago, so I’ll just listen to you.”

Chaeyoung hums and ties the box back up. “Okay, then I’ll just do it. Um, do you mind ordering chicken or something while we wait?”

“Sure.” Reaching for your phone, you ask, “Would you be opposed to romcoms?”

“I’m never opposed to romcoms,” the other girl answers.

You have to remind yourself to order two servings of chicken, something that you haven’t done in a while. But it’s comforting, in a way, to not be alone again.

“Can you believe we’ve only got a week left of filming? I feel like I haven’t seen you at all.”

You wince guiltily, even though you know that Yerim doesn’t mean it. Acting with your friend was originally a huge incentive for you to accept the film’s role, but the two of you quickly discovered that you had almost no scenes together, and with your push-and-pull with Chaeyoung, you forgot all about it. “Sorry, Yerim.”

She makes an incredulous expression, swatting your arm. “Don’t be ridiculous, Y/N. I’m happy you’re pursuing love and all that, and besides, we’ll have plenty of opportunities to act together.”

Blinking, you set your cup down on the counter. “Pursuing love?”

Yerim raises her eyebrow and says, “Yeah. Aren’t you and Chaeyoung together yet? We’ve been filming for two months, I’ll be shocked if you still haven't kissed and made up.”

“Uh. Well, we’ve kissed, but I don’t think it counted,” you frown.

Your friend sighs and rolls her eyes. She’s all too used to how dense you are, and apparently, she’s finally gotten tired of it. “You’re an idiot. You literally met the morning of your first script reading, and you knew each other for… what, a week before you had your kiss scene? There’s got to be something there.”

“No.”

Right on cue, a few of the other cast members arrive, Chaeyoung sandwiched between them. “Have you seen the articles?” Nayeon grins, waving her phone around in the air. She’s drunk, obviously, but you have to indulge her.

“Which articles?”

She shoves the screen in your face as an answer, and you cringe when you find a screencap of you and Chaeyoung. “You won’t believe the chemistry-- nope, I’m not reading that.” You hand the phone back to Nayeon, then press it in her hand when she doesn’t take it. Yerim sends you a knowing expression, one that you definitely don’t like.

“Aw, come on! It’s good press,” Nayeon whines. “And a great kiss scene.”

“Don’t be weird,” Chaeyoung warns. She doesn’t seem to be drunk at all, though she does look fantastic in the silver dress that she wears. Your eyes linger on her for an embarrassing amount of time.

Nayeon pouts. She’s bubbly-- you’ve learned that much through acting alongside her in a total of three productions so far. You note that your costar doesn’t seem to be so accustomed to her temperament yet. “You’re no fun, Chaeng. We all know you enjoyed it.”

She goes bright pink at that amidst Yerim’s joking coos. “The token straight, converted?” your friend gasps, and you elbow her to stop her from going too far.

Apparently, it already has. “I didn’t!” Chaeyoung defends herself.

“Prove it,” Nayeon demands, slipping when she attempts to lean on the counter next to you.

Chaeyoung goes silent at that, apparently unable to find a way to ‘prove it’. You finally sigh, “Okay, I think that’s enough teas--”

If it wasn’t for the fact that you’ve long since memorized your entire script book, you would almost think that Chaeyoung reaching forward to tug on the front of your shirt is a scene between your two characters. After all, it’s perfectly in character for your eyes to widen comically as the other girl kisses you right on the lips.

It’s also in character for Nayeon to start whooping next to you when your hands wrap around Chaeyoung’s waist to pull her in closer. You part at the noise. “You certainly look like you liked it,” Nayeon grins.

“Yeah, get a room,” Yerim follows, and you shove her.

“You know what? Maybe we will.” Ignoring your friends’ jeering, you grab Chaeyoung’s wrist and lead her down the hallway, though not to a bedroom like you joked you would. “Hey. You okay? I didn’t know if that teasing crossed a line,” you whisper worriedly.

She bites down on her lip, but instead of answering you, Chaeyoung tilts your face up and leans closer, only stopped by your hand on her wrist. “Chae…”

“I’m sorry, this… this isn’t what you want, is it?” She steps back, mouth already opening to apologize, but you stop her from leaving you alone in the hallway.

“Shouldn’t I be asking you that?” With the flashing neon lights echoing in her eyes, you can’t tell what Chaeyoung’s feeling, and you can’t tell if she’s willing to answer you properly at all. “I’m not making a move until you tell me to.”

Still, you don’t hear her say a word, until your grip starts to loosen on her wrist. “Did you drive here yourself?” she finally asks, barely audible. You nod hesitantly, and Chaeyoung’s voice grows firmer when she says, “I’m telling you to make a move.”

“I thought you were questioning?”

She swallows hard and takes your hand. “Not anymore.”

You don’t taste any alcohol when you lick your lower lip, and so, you nod. It’s stupid, especially considering how quickly your time together is about to end.

But for once, you know what you want.

“Good luck out there, Chae,” you smile, arms wrapped around the girl’s waist.

“Thanks,” she hums, adjusting her hair yet again in the mirror. “We’re almost done filming, I have to promote us well so that we have enough money to at least put the damn film out.”

“Mm.” Your thumb smooths over the sliver of skin exposed by her top, and you place your chin on her shoulder to look at the two of you together.

She glances down at you. “What? Are you thinking about something?”

“Sort of,” you shrug. “I just can’t believe we’re almost done, but we… we just started this. You know, this thing between us.”

“Yeah, it’s definitely a thing. But it doesn’t have to stop with filming,” Chaeyoung says offhandedly.

Raising an eyebrow, you question, “Doesn’t it? It’s going to be suspicious for us to constantly be seen together after filming together, I’ve seen the way your fans behave. Especially while you’re not out.”

“I think I can negotiate that with my company,” the other girl shakes her head.

You joke, “What, you release another two albums if you get to come out about having a girlfriend?”

“Do you want to be my girlfriend?” Chaeyoung responds immediately. Her ears pink endearingly, and you wait for her to clarify, “In secret for now, obviously. But… one day, I’ll be out about it. I promise.”

“Don’t make empty promises, okay?” You press a kiss to her bare shoulder and let her go when you hear a knock at the dressing room door. “Do good!”

“Alright, Chaeyoung, it’s about time that we ask you some questions about your upcoming film, isn’t it?”

“Yeah, absolutely,” your costar smiles, and you raise your head from your phone to watch the screen. She’s sitting cross-legged across from some of the most famous idol interviewers in Korea, absolutely poised and natural even in front of the crowd that cheers over the interview.

The woman behind the podium clears her throat. “A huge talking point in Korea right now is your chemistry with your costar, Y/N. How exactly do you pull that off, since you’ve never experienced a relation like that?”

Chaeyoung laughs nervously, tucking her hair behind her ear. “Oh. Well, um, I don’t have much experience with relationships at all, so--”

“Really? A pretty girl like you must have had a boyfriend or two before.” You despise the way that the interviewer leans in conspiratorially, as if the prying questions weren’t completely scripted. “But you seem a little to pretty to have experienced that, am I right?”

The crowd laughs with her, but Chaeyoung glances behind the scenes, probably to where her own staff sits. “You know, you can tell me if you ever felt… uncomfortable during filming,” the interviewer continues on. “Y/N has been out for years, hasn’t she?”

“Oh, she has…” You’re practically fuming, but you also can’t seem to pry your eyes away from the screen. All of Chaeyoung’s practiced idol-charm has seemed to dissipate into thin air, and she’s practically blending into the wall as she sits there.

The Chaeyoung you know-- no, the Chaeyoung that you’ve come to know, wouldn’t stand to hear something like that. You’ve watched her argue with a scriptwriter, and you’ve watched him get fired because he said something incredibly offensive, even though it wasn’t about you. But here, she sits still and just listens to the interviewer discuss you behind your back, and she says nothing about all the disgustingly backhanded comments.

The thing is, you don’t care about Chaeyoung not being out. You were closeted for enough time yourself, and you know how hard it is, so you’d never wish it on her; but watching her completely let go of all her personal principles just for a stupid interview is just another reminder that you’re letting go of your own. Chaeyoung won’t ever speak up, you realize, because her career comes before anything else. And you can’t stand for that.

“I’m leaving,” you tell the guard standing outside of your door. Only increasing your anger, tears start to burn in your eyes, and you scrape your sleeve across your face as roughly as you can. Chan picks up on one dial, and you say furiously, “Pick me up. It’s over.” In more ways than one.

Chaeyoung shivers at the top of the hill, where she’s supposed to be filming her closing scene with you. She hasn’t seen you for the past week, and after how disastrous her interview was, she’s pretty sure she knows why.

“Where’s Y/N?” she finally asks her makeup artist, giving in to her own curiosity.

Felix shrugs, reaching to mess with the blood on her hairline. “I have no idea, honestly, I haven’t seen her yet. She’s never late, though, you don’t have to worry. You’ll get your scene done.”

“That’s…” Chaeyoung sighs. That’s why she should be worried. “Right.”

“Okay, can we start?” Seulgi shouts. It’s started to rain, but with the excited look on the director’s face, Chaeyoung figures that it suits the scene even better than the gray clouds that had been planned. “Great. Chaeyoung, Y/N!”

Your hair is plastered to your forehead with the rain, and water makes your blouse cling to your curves; with the grim expression on your face, Chaeyoung could easily just mistake you for your character. “Hi,” you mutter, taking a seat on the grass right next to your costar. You say nothing else.

When cued, Chaeyoung takes a deep breath before her line. “Luna. I love you.”

For a second, Chaeyoung thinks you won’t respond, but the rasp to your voice proves her wrong. “No. No, you don’t.”

“I think I’m the one who should be deciding that, don’t you?” The blonde raises her eyebrows, reaching forward hesitantly for your shoulder.

Of course, you dodge it. Blinking the rain out of your eyes, you’re resigned when you ask, “You have your birthday gala tonight, don’t you?”

“Yes, but--” Chaeyoung swallows, lets her hand make contact, then continues, “I’m spending as much time as I can with you, aren’t I with you right now?”

“But you’re going.” It feels like you’re staring right into Chaeyoung’s soul when you speak, as despondent as your voice is. She nods, and you stand, her hand slipping off of your shoulder and into her lap. “Then go. You’re still a princess at the end of the day, aren’t you?”

“At the end of the day, yes…”

“You can’t do that. You sneak out onto my ships, get my people to love you and protect you, and then turn right back to your family to stay safe while we die for you. You can’t say you support our cause and then go back on it when it’s inconvenient for you, it doesn’t work like that!” Chaeyoung flinches at how intense you sound; at this point, she barely knows if it’s still acting. She can only hear her own heart in her ears, can only see your chest heaving from how quickly you spoke, and it all feels too real.

“What, do you want me to get found out?” Chaeyoung demands, getting to her feet as well. The rain becomes harsher, angled so that it perfectly blurs her vision of you. “I’ve saved your ass just as many times too, don’t pretend like I’m not a valuable part of your ship!”

“You’re still pretending.” Realizing that it’s not the right line, Chaeyoung opens her mouth to stop you, but your voice chills her into silence when you speak again. “You’ll always pretend, as long as it benefits you, won’t you? You can’t do that, Helen, not if you ‘love me’. Putting a crown on your head doesn’t mean that you’re a princess. Until you realize that, and until you’re willing to embrace it, you don’t love me. and I don’t love you.”

None of it is the script. None of it is the scene that you rehearsed a thousand times together in your trailer, but somehow, it makes Chaeyoung’s heart quaver in her throat so much more than the original lines ever did.

And when you drop your gaze to the ground, turning to walk off into the rain alone, she knows that to you, your entire relationship is already done.

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