#it was. kind of embarrassing. cos i was like Haha no one else would possibly react as badly as i did im always the weird one | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

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#it was. kind of embarrassing. cos i was like Haha no one else would possibly react as badly as i did im always the weird one

seeingivy · 6 months

Text

high infidelity

satoru gojo x f!reader

do you really wanna know where I was april 29th?

**part of my satoru as taylor swift songs series

content: infidelity (omg who knew), yn is a doctor, satoru gets injured and haha ur still my emergency contact's his way back into your life, megumi and yuuji flirting side quest, a big hot flaming mess of writing this is actually so bad

an: no one say anything to me about this fic actually. or the fact that I made everyone do a poll about which taylor as gojo to write just to not write either of those options and produce a flaming, hot wreck of garbage. anyways, live love high infidelity this song will always be special to me because on april 29th, I was indeed, at the eras tour seeing mother for the first time

You swallow hard as the waitress walks up again, with that sheepish, awkward smile on her face. And you dread the unrelenting, embarrassing question that’s going to follow. One that she’s already asked, three times.

“Are you still waiting for someone or would you like to order?”

And you’re not sure why, but the fact that she asks the question, in that phrasing, in that tone, is enough to aggravate the very thin patience you already have. Because really, it’s quite possibly the stupidest question she could have asked.

Clearly, you are still waiting for someone. You’ve been sitting here for the past hour and a half. If you were really intent on eating at this restaurant alone, then you would have ordered the second they seated you.

And it’s rude, abrasive even. To ask, to relentlessly question, three times. Because obviously, you feel horrible for taking the table, when there’s a line of people patiently waiting by the door. And it’s not your fault that your boyfriend is late. And really, it’s just humiliating, that she keeps throwing it in your face, that you’re sitting here, alone when he should be here making you feel special.

You sigh, giving her a halfhearted smile.

“Can I have twenty more minutes? I promise I’ll leave after that and let you give the table to someone else.”

She smiles, genuine and sweet, as she places her hand on your shoulder and makes a promise to bring some more bread before you leave.

The premise of it - the fact that she smiled in earnest and must know that you feel horrible, that she has her own deposit of pity for you - has you bringing your fingers up to your forehead and massaging that small, pulsating feeling by your temples. Because here you were, mentally cussing out the poor girl working minimum wage at the restaurant when the real subject of your wrath couldn’t even be bothered to show up.

And you hate that the negativity, the frustrations of the situation, seem to bleed into everything else. Because you’ll find yourself being upset with Yuri, but then suddenly it turns into a blind agitation to everything. The barista, for not making your coffee right, your co-workers asking to switch shifts so they can go on a trip with their partners, the laundry machine when it stops working.

Your phone starts incessantly buzzing on the table, the smallest glimmer of hope sparking in your chest at the sound. And instantly dies, when you realize it’s just the Emergency Room calling you.

You slide open the call, pressing the phone to your ear.

“This is Tokyo Metropolitan Hospital. Is this a miss Y/N L- wait.” Megumi states into the phone, mumbling off the speaker.

You press the phone harder to your ear, to try to catch the end of the conversation that Yuuji must be having with Megumi.

“Y/N. Right, hi!” he states, voice halfheartedly cheery, which is already odd enough for him.

“Hi Megumi. Why are you calling me on my day off?” you deadpan, that backlogged deposit of irritation coming in hot and fresh for the sweetest resident you have.

“Right. Um, we have a mister Satoru Gojo in the Emergency Room who has you listed as his Emergency Contact. He’s kind of in bad shape so we were going to call regarding-”

“Gojo? I’ll be there in ten.” you respond, shoving the phone into your purse and leaving the tip flat on the tablecloth. You give the waitress - standing there with that restocked bread in her hand - a polite wave on the way out and speed as fast as you can to the hospital.

You march into the ER, rubbing warmth into your biceps, to find Megumi at the nurses station, as always, flirting with the pink haired student nurse he’s taken a keen liking to.

“Hey. Where is he?” you ask, Yuuji and Megumi turning their heads to give you half hearted smiles. It’s only the start of the night shift, but by the way their shoulders are already sagging, you can tell whoever has to deal with them has a long night ahead of them.

“Right sooooo. We can’t decipher any of his paperwork. We need you to read it first and then you can see him. He’s in room eleven.” Yuuji states, giving a peachy smile, as you scan over Gojo’s characteristic illegible handwriting.

“Jesus. He still writes like a twelve year old.” you murmur, filling out the sheet at the side with all the information Yuuji needed.

“You’re all dressed up, teach. What’s the occasion?” Megumi asks, lazily leaning his cheek in the palm of his hand.

“Ah. It’s my one year anniversary with Yuri. We were supposed to go to dinner.” you mumble, scratching the last of the information on the sheet and handing it to Yuuji.

You feel a hand sling around your shoulder and a distinct smell of smoke, only to find Shoko hanging off your frame.

“And yet here you are, because he didn’t show up.” she murmurs, earning you a set of wide eyes as you glare at Shoko. Because at their core, Yuuji and Megumi are first, definitely crushing on each other, and second, nosy as hell.

“And here you are. Destroying every last cell in your lungs, that are eagerly, earnestly begging you to stop.” you deadpan.

She flicks your nose as you finish filling out the sheet and reading through the paramedics report that was attached to his paperwork.

“Please tell me you attacked Yuri at the dinner table and that’s why you’re here. Fork to the hand? Spoon in the eye? Knife to the dick?” Shoko asks, excitedly.

“Didn’t you like take an oath? For the preservation of human life?” Megumi deadpans.

“No. I skipped that day of medical school.” Shoko replies.

“Gojo’s here, I’m still his emergency contact.” you respond back, giving her a pointed glare.

“What happened?”

You turn your head expectantly to Megumi, who obliges.

“His car got t-boned. He’s pretty roughed up.” Megumi responds.

You give Shoko a weary look, as you march to the other side of the unit, preparing yourself for whatever roughed up version of Gojo you were about to be greeted with. Because every interaction with Gojo was a rush of emotions - good, bad, sweet, and ugly - but this might be the biggest thing you’ve ever had to stomach yet.

“So. Who is this Satoru guy? I’ve never heard of him before.” Megumi asks Shoko, giving Yuuji an all knowing glance.

“Her ex-boyfriend.” Shoko responds.

“No way. Before that asshat Yuri?” Yuuji asks, suddenly too invested in the story all together.

“Well, obviously. He taught as a professor at the same medical school she attended.”

“Y/N dated a professor?” Megumi asks, tone incredulous.

“I mean that’s one way to get through I guess.” Yuuji adds.

Shoko smacks the top of Yuuji’s head, earning a fit of laughter from the two of them for his stupid comment.

“You need to focus on your nursing exams instead of flirting with Megumi on your fifteen. It would do you some good to flirt with your preceptor. And no, he was just a fellow doing research at the time. They were best friends for a good few years, had that whole will they won’t they vibe going on.” Shoko responds.

“So….did they?” Megumi asks.

“They did. To be honest, I can’t really remember why they broke up. Something stupid.” Shoko shrugs, giving the two of them shoves on the shoulder before walking past the hall, to find you standing in front of the door. Your hand is resting against the handle, but you have yet to yank down and push yourself in.

“Are you warming up the handle or…?”

You’re thrown out of your train of thought to find Shoko at your side, hands buried deep in her white coat as she gives you a weary glance. To anyone else, Shoko would seem wildly disinterested, almost annoyed at how you were acting. But you know better and can see that small twinge of concern buried under her long eyelashes, the hint of it in her voice.

“Oh. Um…no. Just got lost in thought.” you murmur, staring at the faded eleven on the marker.

“About?”

You swallow hard, the warm tears filling your eyes.

“I haven’t talked to him in so long. And the last time we talked we were arguing over…..leaving dishes in the sink. Breaking up. If I walk in there and he’s dead, that’s going to be the last thing I ever said to him.” you whisper, air grating against your throat.

Shoko puts a hand on your shoulder and squeezes once..

“He’s not dead. The monitor tech would have picked up on that.”

“The monitor tech? Are we talking about the same monitor tech? Because Nobara is too busy flirting with the phlebotomist Maki to ever do her job. They’re worse than Megumi and Yuuji.”

Shoko scoffs, before rolling her eyes at you.

“No one is worse than Megumi and Yuuji. Yuuji knocked the entire crash cart over when he clocked in because Megumi complimented his Star Wars themed scrubs.”

You snort, shaking your head, as you take a deep breath in and push the handle down. Shoko gives you a warm smile as you walk in and flick the lights on, only to see Satoru, sitting up in bed and lazily scrolling through the TV channels.

He looks over at you first, his eyes going wide, as you walk up to him and cup the side of his cheek. The tears that were welling in your eyes are falling in full flesh, at the sight of him all battered and bruised.

His snow white hair is matted red, an angry, glaring scratch on his forehead. His arm is littered with tiny cuts, with a good amount of dressing on his torso, the red blood already seeping through and the look on his face so broken and tired that it makes your heart twinge.

“Satoru.”

He smiles, albeit a little confused, as he looks up at you and brings his hand up to yours, where it’s resting against your face.

“Hey princess.”

You laugh through your sprout of tears, which has the smallest smile turning up on his cut up lips and the soft, faint smile lines appearing near his eyes.

“You here to patch me up, doc?” he whispers.

You shake your head incessantly, which has him rolling his eyes.

“Not today.”

“Shame. I heard having sex is really good for patient recovery.”

You smack his shoulder, biting hard down on your cheeks that Satoru Gojo, in full flesh, is okay. Because he still has the audacity to flirt with you, even when he’s near death in the hospital.

“I’m going to look at your chart, okay?”

You let go of his face and find yourself in front of the computer, logging in with your credentials, and trying to pull up his chart as fast as you can.

“If I found out you got into this accident because you were trying to find the perfect song before you got home, I’m going to put your head on a stick, Satoru Gojo” you murmur, earning a laugh from him.

“First and foremost, you always have to close the drive home on a banger. Sue me.”

“I think I might just.”

“And contrary to your beliefs, this accident actually wasn’t my fault. They crashed into me, naturally, because I do no wrong. Ever.” he states.

“Right.” you chuckle.

You read over the report, making it a point to berate Yuuji for his shitty charting later, as you look through his vital signs and blood cultures that were taken when he arrived here.

“So do all doctors dress like they’re about to go clubbing or is it just you?”

You look down, only now noticing that you’re still wearing the a-line dress from the dinner you were supposed to have with Yuri. You make a mental note to shoot him a text after checking with Satoru after, knowing all too well that with how busy Yuri is, you standing him up would throw him over the edge.

“Just me. I really love to put on a show for my patients, Gojo. And what clubs are you going to where people dress like this?” you mutter, clicking through the scans that were taking.

“I appreciate the lengths you go to for me. It’s always what I loved about you. And I exclusively attend Taylor Swift night at the Underground” he states, placing his hands on his chest.

You look over and glare at him, before reading through the treatment plan. When you look over Nanami’s notes, you feel your heart drop and turn over to look at him. At his bright, blue eyes so wide and unaware, the look on his face so…innocent it bothers you. That in a few hours, he’s going to be in unspeakable pain while he recovers.

The door opens and Nanami and Yuuta are standing at the door, Nanami already scoffing at you.

“That’s confidential patient information, Dr. L/N.” Nanami states, voice stern. He hands you a jacket, which you pull on, as you hike your hands under your biceps and talk to him.

“You were going to tell me all of it anyways. So…what’s the plan here?” you grumble, settling next to Gojo at the side of his bed, placing your hands in his nearly pink hair.

“Well. I’m going to-”

“The surgical resident has to be Yuuta, I don’t trust that dumbass Todo to do it. You have to use prolene stitches, I don’t want his skin to scar and don’t leave him under for too long. He’s never been one to suit medications well. Don’t play any rap music when you’re operating, he hates that type of stuff and-”

Nanami puts his hands square on your shoulders, squeezing once.

“Thank you, Dr. L/N. We’ll talk all details after, okay?” Nanami states, voice soft, as you turn over to look at Gojo.

Gojo gives you a weak smile, which you return, before pushing his hair off of his forehead, and lightly brushing through the white tresses as he looks at them.

“Give it to me straight, Kento Bento.” Satoru states, earning an eye roll from Nanami who's clearly unamused. But you can tell he doesn’t mind it all too much, because in the monotony of shitty patients, he’s always been one to appreciate the sweet jokesters. And Satoru’s the biggest clown there is.

“It’s a relatively easy procedure, Satoru. We’re just going to go in and repair the damage that you sustained to your digestive tract from the crash. Do you have any questions for me?” Nanami asks.

“Can I request that she’s not in there when it happens?” Satoru asks, looking up at you.

“Hey. I can-”

“Yes. We’ll make sure of it.” Yuuta responds.

“Thank you, Yuuta.” Gojo responds, giving him a smile.

“We’ll be around in an hour to take you to surgery.” Nanami states, ignoring the pointed glare you were giving him as he strolls out of the room.

You turn to Gojo, the overstimulation of the past ten minutes really hitting you, as you feel your brain short circuit while he’s looking at you. You try to focus on the sensation of his hair in your hand and that pulsating beat that you’ve been feeling for his wrist, but you can’t really process any of it.

Every high and low you’ve experienced in the past few minutes - the elation in Gojo’s voice, the pain from seeing him suffering, how he’s still the same as you left him- it’s enough to abandon any rational thought processes from occurring in your head. And it leaves you standing there, silently, with your hands on him.

“Hi Y/N.”

“Hi ‘Toru.”

He smiles at the nickname, reaching forward to lace his fingers through yours.

“I was driving and then…I wasn’t. I looked up and all I could see was the stoplight above me, then the flashing lights of the ambulance, and now…you….looking at me like that. Your brain isn’t the only one hurting right now.”

“Looking at you ike what?” you murmur.

“Like you’re in pain, Y/N.” he states, emphasizing his syllables.

You shake your head, fighting down that wave of worry that’s sitting in your skin.

“You know, Kento’s a really good doctor. And Yuuta…he’s like the most promising surgical resident. And even then, I-I can get another senior surgeon if you don’t want a student. And-and it really won’t hurt that bad and I’ll make sure they give you all the good meds and-”

“Y/N.”

“Sorry. I’m sorry. I’m rambling. I know you’ve always hated that and I just-”

“I don’t hate it. Just, slow down for a second…talk me through all this because I really don’t know what’s going on and you know I don’t like not knowing.”

You pull up the chair, messing with his hands as you talk.

“You have to get surgery. The impact you had when you crashed led to-”

“Y/N. I know all of that already. I’m asking about you.”

You frown, swallowing hard, as you run your fingers along the scratch on his knuckles.

“You never update your current information.”

“Huh?”

“You….you never canceled the stupid Hulu subscription when we got the Disney Plus bundle. And you kept having to trek all the way across town to get the mail, because you forgot to change the address when we moved, and you-”

“I don’t really see how-”

“You forgot to change your emergency contact, Satoru. After we broke up, you-you forgot to call them and tell them that they shouldn’t call me.” you hum, as Gojo’s hand tightens in it’s hold around yours.

“Oh shit, Y/N. Sweetheart, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to-”

You lurch up from your chair, tangling your arms around his neck as you crackle his head into your frame, that incessant stream of tears pouring down your eyes as he brings his own arms around yours.

And it feels too fast, because suddenly Nanami and Yuuta are back at your sides, giving you sympathetic glances as they wheel Gojo away and you’re left standing in the hallway, flat against the wall, every horrible outcome of the next four hours playing through your head.

On hour five, already a bad sign, you’re sitting flat against the floor with a jello cup in your hand and in Megumi’s spare pair of scrubs. They’re both sitting at your sides, the dead quiet of the night shift leaving them with you.

“Kento likes to be really careful, Y/N. That’s all it is.” Megumi states, giving his best attempts at calm reassurance.

“And Yuuta’s great. We all love Yuuta, he’s sweet….intelligent. He’s more than capable to do this.” Yuuji adds.

You crack through every last bone in your finger, the entire interaction playing over in your head.

“I-I just went in there so fast. And the time was so…so short that I didn’t even say much to him.” you respond, sighing.

“When’s Yuri coming?”

You turn your head to the side, in confusion, before you register Yuji’s words all together.

“Why would he-”

You panic, remembering that you had never texted Yuri back, that he’s probably fuming in his own pit of rage right now at his apartment, cursing your name to god knows what degree. You reach for your phone in your pocket, only to find no notifications from him. You scroll up on the chat, only to find that he hadn’t texted you the entire day, yesterday.

His last text read April 28th, a reminder that he needed you to pick up his drycleaning for his golf game this weekend.

“He’s really an asshole, isn’t he?” you spit.

You see Megumi and Yuuji give each other wide eyed looks over the top of your head, as you click your phone shut and let it fall to the ground.

Because in the dim lights of this hospital, with Satoru’s blood, some of it still smeared on the side of your hand, you feel like you’re seeing clearly for the first time in years.

That really, Yuri in actuality, is not the one for you. And it’s not that he’s a bad guy, he’s honorable in some sense really, but what he gives isn’t even a fraction close to what you want.

He’s tall and lanky. The type of guy to represent every portion of the food triangle in the three meals he ate. He wakes up at five in the morning to go to the gym before an entire day at work, and still somehow finds time to read and run a personal wellness blog when he gets home.

He’s classy, in every sense of the term. The exact type of man you envision when you think of someone put together, wholly and fully. On top of their shit, living their best life, one that people aspired to.

And that was in no way what you wanted.

You wanted Satoru. Satoru who convinces you that there’s still enough room for a little treat after dinner, despite the fact that you both stuffed yourself full at the restaurant. He sleeps in late on the weekends, pressing lazy kisses to your skin to wake you up before entirely botching the whole breakfast in bed thing he was trying to impress you with.

He was real, in every sense of the term. The type of person you envision when you imagine the person you wanted to spend the rest of your life with. He’s funny, he’s kind and he most certainly would never leave you stranded at a restaurant on your one year anniversary. Because Satoru Gojo certainly wasn’t classy, but he was honorable. And if he promised to be somewhere, he’d be there early, making sure everything was perfect before you got there.

And right now, two of your most trusted co-workers had their hands inside his body cavity, trying to fix the mess in there.

When Gojo comes to, there’s an aching soreness in his torso and neck. He can feel the tense pressure around his arms too, bandages wrapped around every square inch of his body. But that warm feeling around his wrist was entirely different from the rest.

He opens his eyes to find you, fast asleep with your head down on the side of his bed and your hand secured tightly around his wrist. Your breaths are slow, so deep in your sleep that you don’t even process Satoru moving around you amidst your slumber.

He brings his hand down to your hair and watches you lean into his touch, nuzzling your head closer to the blanket. Your hair is messy at this point, bunched up at the top of your head in the messiest knot he’s seen you sport yet.

There’s a knock at the door and Yuuji is standing there, a small smile on his face.

“Good morning, Mr. Gojo. Welcome back.”

Satoru smiles as he moves to his side and starts to hook him up to the monitors, taking a set of fresh vitals.

“How are you feeling?”

“Just sore, Yuuji. How are you?”

“Ah. Night shift. Same old.”

“Is that little emo you like here?”

Satoru watches Yuuji’s cheeks go bright pink, as he starts fumbling with the cuff around his hand.

“Ah, you mean, Megumi? Y/N’s resident? No, he-he’s off tonight.” he stumbles.

“Shame. Nothing like flirting on the night shift.” Satoru states, clicking his tongue.

“Oh, I don’t flirt with-”

“Well, you should. He’s cute. And a doctor. Someone is going to snatch him up real fast.” Satoru states, definitively.

“Mr. Gojo, I don’t know if-”

“Trust me. I know all too well. People swoop in for the doctors before you can even fight to get them back.” Satoru states, reaching down to tuck your hair behind your ear.

“Well, I-”

“I’m just saying, kid. Swoop in before it’s too late.” he states, giving him a smile.

“Yeah. Sure, I-I will. Do you need anything else, Mr. Gojo?”

“Can you get her a blanket? She always gets allergies when it’s too drafty in the room she’s sleeping in.”

Yuuji smiles, tapping on the railings of the bed.

“Sure thing.”

And Yuuji curses himself for doing it, for meddling, but he pokes his head into the room one last time before leaving.

“And just so you know. You….sometimes you think it’s too late to swoop. But it’s actually like…the perfect time. To swoop….like a bird or something, I don’t know-” Yuuji stammers.

And when Yuuji leaves and Gojo is able to process his words, he’s trying his best to wipe the smile off of his face.

“Hey, Megs. How are his vitals today?” you ask, swiveling over in your chair.

Megumi, irritated with your constant pestering, has had enough of his fill today. He swings his own chair around, tugging at the stethoscope around his neck, as he glares at you.

“For the hundredth time, your little boo boo bear is just fine. We’re planning to discharge tomorrow.”

You frown, reaching for the closest item - a roll of gauze - and throw it square in his face.

“He’s not my boo boo bear. And I’m just checking. You know he could have complications after the surgery like inf-”

“Infection, hypotension, septic shock, multiple system organ failure, yeah yeah. I know. I graduated top of my class at medical school, you know?”

“And yet here you are, being taught by Shoko. You’re clearly not that great if you’re being trained by a girl who cheated her way through medical school.”

“I’m going to leave. And when I’m gone, you’re going to be really pissed because you’re going to be stuck with some idiot that can’t even take vitals.” Megumi deadpans, swiveling back to his computer.

“No, you’re not. You’d never leave your boo boo bear hanging. Especially since he’s planning on asking you on a date tomorrow.”

“He’s not asking me on a date.” Megumi responds.

You smile, trying to swallow your laugh as you respond.

“Oh, sure he is. And-”

Your phone timer goes off, as you gleefully sprint out of your chair, and down the hall to Satoru’s room. Nanami’s in there, unwrapping his bandages, as you knock and enter to make your presence known. At the sight of you, Nanami’s glaring as you drag the chair up and sit at his side.

“Y/N. You should be working.”

“I’m on my lunch. And I’m allowed to do whatever I want for lunch.”

“You should eat something, Y/N. Instead of bothering our patients.” Nanami scolds, as he shuts the door behind you and you turn to Satoru.

Satoru looks way better, the bruising on his skin fading to yellow and the cuts all around his skin healing. He’s smiling softly, a hand cupping your cheek as he talks.

“Good morning, Y/N.”

“Hi Satoru.”

“You know, you really should eat something on your lunch break.”

“You know, you really should keep your annoying opinions to yourself.” you respond.

He scoffs, moving his hand to mess up your hair, as you swat his hands off.

“So.” Satoru states.

“So?”

“A little birdie told me that you broke up with Yuri last night.”

“Well, your little birdie was wrong. As nosy as he is, he clearly doesn’t know how to listen.”

You both laugh, Gojo slightly dejected by your response, as you lace your hands through his, and smile at your hands firmly pressed together.

“Yuuji’s got a bad case of the chismosa virus.”

“And you don’t? I heard you giggling with Shoko at the nurses station about how the emo is going to ask Yuuji on a date.”

“No, Yuuji's asking Megumi on the date. And okay, but that’s actually a big deal. I’ve been trying to set that up for months.”

“Well, you can’t take credit because I’m actually the one who got Yuuji to do it.”

You frown, reaching forward to pinch his cheeks.

“Shut up. It’s only the months of build up, that I basically created, that’s making him do it.”

“Well, I pushed him over the edge. So it’s my victory.”

You sigh, sitting back in your chair as you smile at him, at how easily you both fall back into this.

“How about we both did it?” you ask, giving him a smile.

“Sure. We always did make a good team.” he responds, making your cheeks burn.

You reach for his blanket and start moving his gown to inspect the incision, trying to make sure that the site wasn’t getting infected, from when you checked yesterday. .

“Okay, pervert. I didn’t realize you were into voyeurism.” Satoru says, incredulously.

“Gojo. Do you even know what voyeurism means?”

“Yeah. It’s people who like to have sex in public.”

You snort, moving the edge of the gown as you note the clean sutures, healing well along the length of his torso.

“That is not what voyeurism means, dumbass.”

“Sorry. I didn’t realize I was fighting with the sex kink expert here.”

“I-I’m not a sex kink expert! You’re just fucking stupid.”

“Oh, shut up.”

You roll your eyes, as you settle back into the chair, reaching forward to cup his face. He smiles, soft and warm, which you return.

“You’re healing really well. It’ll just be a faint line, right around your torso when you’re out of here.” you murmur.

“It kinda looks like I got my legs cut off and someone sewed them back on.” he murmurs.

“That’s not funny.” you deadpan, glaring at him.

“Kinda funny. That’s a really unfortunate way to die.” he responds.

“I know there’s a universe out there where that actually happens to you. And I know for a fact that Satoru doesn’t think it’s funny at all.”

“Okay, Doctor Strange. Let’s pipe down there, alright? Even if that did happen to me, I’d come back from it. Because guess what?”

“Don’t say it.” you groan.

“Because I’m the strongest.”

“You know that never gets less annoying right?”

“You love it.” he responds, reaching forward to pinch your cheek.

You look down, at your hand tangled in Satoru’s as you find a way to broach the topic. That for all intents and purposes, that you want nothing to do with Yuri. That you want him, that you do love his stupid jokes, that you’d beg on your hands and knees for him to take you back because-

“Do you want to go to the aquarium on Friday?” Satoru asks.

“The aquarium?”

“Yeah. We can take a picnic basket, eat on the lawn outside afterwards.” Satoru says.

You swallow the lump in your throat, aggressively nodding in response.

“Yeah. That sounds nice. We can um-carpool.”

“Sure. It’s a date.” he responds, leaning into his pillow with a soft smile on his face.

You bite down the stupid smile that’s rising to your cheeks, as you close your eyes, humming in agreement.

“Yeah. It’s a date.” you whisper back.

Eight days after the fact and Yuri, in his infinite wisdom, finally comes through. That’s when he musters the courage to bring himself to your apartment, where Satoru has been staying with you since he was discharged. And when Satoru answers the door, Yuri’s all levels of pissed.

“Who are you?” Yuri asks.

“I’m the owner of this house.” Gojo responds, trying not to laugh at his own joke.

“Did Y/N move?”

“No, dumbass. It was a joke.” he responds, rolling his eyes.

Satoru leans off of the door frame, calling for you, as you join him at his side.

“Hey, you okay? I was planning on making lunch for- oh.”

Satoru smiles, reaching forward to ruffle your hair, before he shuffles away.

“Holler if you need me.”

You shoot Satoru a grateful smile, infinitely thankful that the two of you were able to pick up right where you left off, as you turn to Yuri in your doorway.

“Where were you on Saturday?” he asks, arms crossed over his chest.

You swallow hard, rehearsing the speech you had prepared with Satoru when you were tangled in his arms last night, and make your best attempt to deliver the blow the best you can.

“Yuri. I think we should stop seeing each other.”

“What?”

“I just don’t think that we’re really compatible. You and I are…on different wavelengths. And you deserve someone who is better suited to you and your….interests.” you murmur, awkwardly rubbing your arms on your arms.

In actuality, you feel a little bit bad. That technically, you might have been…a little bit dishonest with Yuri. Because you’re having this conversation with him, days after the fact, when you’ve already done god knows what with Gojo in the past few days he’s been back with you. He’s all but living in your apartment at this point, under the premise of needing twenty four hour medical support, when really, you’re both just soaking up on time you lost.

Time is so precious, that you forgot to tell Yuri until he showed up, on your doorstep. You finally understand why Yuri was late to things, because whatever he was doing when he wasn’t with you, must have been keeping him occupied the way this was keeping you occupied.

Because you kept planning on calling him, but then Gojo would take you out to breakfast. Or you’d sleep in too late and then knew that you’d be interrupting Yuri at work. And the list, it went on and on and led you to this moment and it’s painfully awkward.

And maybe it’s bad, a little bit evil even, but that small bit of bad feeling is overshadowed by every bit of good that you’ve felt in the past few days. At Gojo ordering dessert out of nowhere, that he insists he’s sharing with you before he eats almost the entire thing, or when he drags you to the bathroom when he’s doing his night time hair care routine.

“Where were you? On Saturday?”

“Look, I just got called into work, okay?”

“Are you…are you serious? Don’t tell me you’re really dating that dumbass who just answered the door?”

“Frankly, it’s none of your business who I date anymore because you…you aren’t really a part of my life anymore. And we’re not dating, we’re just-”

“God. He flashes one pretty smile at you and you go running back to him? Need I remind you, that you complained about him for months on end. About how he’s messy, he’s careless, he’s-”

“That stuff doesn’t matter. At least not anymore.”

“You’re a bitch, you know that?”

You feel Gojo padding behind you, and you put your hand up in the air, signaling for him to stay where he is.

“Do you really want to know where I was on April 29th? On our one year anniversary, I was sitting in a shitty restaurant, for an hour and a half waiting for you to show up. When I hadn’t heard from you all day. And then I got a call, that the man that I love was in the hospital, and then I was at his side. Willing him to wake up, because I would be so fucking angry, so fucking pissed if he died and I didn’t get to tell him that he meant the world to me.”

Yuri swallows hard, the look of betrayal etched on his face.

“Are you trying to hurt me right now? Do you get some kind of sick gratification from killing the one you love?” he asks.

“I’d argue that my way is nicer actually. One fell swoop, with the truth out there. The slowest way to kill someone is never loving them enough. And honestly, it’s just cruel. And of course, something that you were too skilled at.”

You’re not sure what it is about what you said, but suddenly Yuri’s stomping down the hallway and you’re shutting the door, as the tears start pouring out of your eyes and you’re leaning against the door.

Now that Yuri’s gone, Satoru’s shed all his inhibitions and he’s cradling you straight in his arms, his soft voice cooing in your ear as you hiccup into his chest.

“Hey. You did so good, princess.”

“I-I’m not crying because I’m sad. I still…I still want you, you know?”

Satoru smiles, bringing his hands up to cup your cheeks in his hand and wipe your tears away.

“I know that, sweetheart. I’m irresistible.” he murmurs.

You lightly shove him, before resting your head against his torso, hearing the rapid beating of his heart under your ear.

“I’m just really relieved. That you-that you’re-”

You look up, at his sparkling blue eyes, the tiny fractals of color like perfectly constructed, charted constellations in his eyes.

“I’m glad you’re here. Again.”

He smiles wide, leaning forward to press his lips to your forehead.

“Me too, yeah?”

the satoru as taylor swift songs series masterlist

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lmk if you would like to be added to my taylor as gojo or my general masterlist in the replies or inbox <3

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snackhobi · 4 years

Text

pairing: hoseok x reader / word count: 26.8k / genre: fluff, smut, mutual pining, best friends to lovers, slow burn, technically a buzzfeed unsolved AU but you don’t need to be familiar with BFU at all so dw!

summary: having hoseok as your best friend and co-host for your web series is a dream come true. the only hitch? you’re kind of in love with him, and it’s getting harder to ignore that fact, even if he doesn’t feel the same for you.

warnings: idiots being oblivious, sexually explicit content, oral (f receiving + brief mentions of m receiving), unprotected sex, multiple orgasms (f receiving), fingering (f receiving), body worship + praise (f receiving), a lot of soft emotions and pet names, hoseok treating reader like a pillow princess

a/n: the more I read this the less happy I am with it but after the amount of time I’ve spent on it/how long it’s gotten, I’m calling it finished (even if it’s a lot lighter on paranormal related stuff than I’d initially planned OOPS...) please feel free to let me know what you think AHH x

Jung Hoseok is a lot of things.

Jung Hoseok is: a work-friend-turned-real-friend-turned-best-friend, and one of your favourite people in the world.

Jung Hoseok is: very easily scared, the opposite of a thrillseeker, Not A Fan of big rollercoasters, or haunted houses, or anywhere that involves jump scares or loud noises or anything vaguely dangerous or threatening.

Jung Hoseok is: a man with ridiculous lung capacity who can also screech so loudly that you’re fairly certain he could shatter glass if he wanted to.

“It’s just a bat, hyung,” Jimin says, before the bat comes back round and Hoseok shrieks again.

Jung Hoseok is: clinging to you with a vice-like grip as aforementioned bat flutters above you, squeaking and trilling, and you stroke his hand in an absent, instinctual motion, trying to soothe him.

“I definitely heard footsteps as well,” Hoseok whimpers. “Why are we here?”

Why are you here? Well, because Jung Hoseok is also: your co-host for one of BigHit’s most popular series, BigHit Unsolved.

It’s funny, in a roundabout sort of way, that Hoseok’s general fear of Most Things had been the thing that had cinched him his spot. You’d never expected Unsolved to explode in the way it had, starting off as a short video series with Yoongi beside you to bounce off as you described unsolved crimes, but then Hoseok had starred opposite you and the audience had just eaten it up: the way he got spooked at real life events, the modulation of his voice when it would rise or dip in fear, the way you riffed off each other- you, calm but enthused about your topic, and Hoseok, a quivering jelly of a man when scared.

Not to mention that Hoseok is just great on screen anyway, personable and bright and charming. He makes you laugh and brings out a level of exuberance in you in a way that no one else can, makes you do ridiculous things without even trying- your interactions are good video fodder, basically, and your audience loves how your friendship comes across on the show.

And that’s another funny thing. You’d known Hoseok before Unsolved, of course, because everyone knows Hoseok, because Hoseok is wonderful, a sunshine of a man, loved by all. You, however, hadn't really spoken much to him- when you'd started at BigHit you'd been crushing on Hoseok in kind of a big way and you'd been worried about embarrassing yourself in front of him, so… you'd done the logical thing of avoiding him as much as was possible without being rude or weird. Face your problems and anxieties? In this economy? Haha, you don't think so.

Anyway. Because of this, your interactions had been pretty limited up until you’d asked him to appear in one of your videos. If anyone asked it was because you’d thought he would be a fun, one-off guest star, which was true, but the main reason was that Yoongi had cancelled because he was sick and no one else had been free when you’d been scrabbling around the office for a replacement. Despite not knowing you all too well, and despite being scared easily by true crime (“my mum watched CSI when I was a kid and it gave nightmares,” he’d told you afterwards), Hoseok had heard about your plight and was happy to replace Yoongi for the episode, and you’d found out that- despite your initial worry that you were going to make things weird- you get on really well.

Like, really well. Not just on camera, either. Before they’d started to roll, you’d been frantically making sure everything was in place, that you had all your notes, that all the pre-production was ready- and Hoseok had made you stand still, taking your hands in his, and he’d smiled at you in a way that had been so warm and comforting that all the tension had leaked out of you. After that it had just been so easy. You’d felt relaxed and the episode had come out great, and then Hoseok suggested that you grab lunch together in the cafeteria so you could get to know each other more. Of course you’d agreed- and the rest is history.

It didn’t take long for Hoseok to turn from a nice and funny colleague, to someone you actively looked for at work gatherings, to someone who you decided to ask to be your permanent co-host for the show, to someone who now has a spare key for your flat in case he ever runs out of snacks or just feels like dropping by. Which he feels like doing a lot, apparently, but you have a key for his place too, so it’s all even stevens. (You steal a lot of his face masks whenever you visit him and he never complains.)

Over time your huge crush on Hoseok has ebbed into a deep platonic love, fading and morphing into a comfortable friendship. Okay, sure, you still think he’s the most beautiful person in the universe and you’d immediately accept if he asked you to marry him and you kind of want to kiss him on the mouth sometimes (a lot of the time) or whatever, but that’s because you know how wonderful he is. It’s platonic. Not romantic. Mmhm. (Mostly.) Either way, you're completely comfortable around him despite any lingering feelings you might have, which is something you appreciate more than you can put into words.

So fast forward to now, multiple seasons into your show, and you’re more than used to Hoseok’s fear and touch. It had been startling, at the beginning, when Hoseok had grabbed onto you whenever he was afraid, but now you’re used to navigating places in the dark while Hoseok clings onto you like a particularly oversized backpack or holds your hand like a lost school child. (You’ve lost count of the minutes, nay, hours of footage that exist of Hoseok doing this, like some sort of gangly limpet, but you don’t mind.) Fans love to splice together footage comparing interactions over the seasons and it’s very obvious how wide eyed and stiff you used to go whenever Hoseok seized you, but now? This is your every day, baby.

Hoseok is still cowering behind you as the lone bat flaps above you, high up in the rafters of the old generator building you’re standing in. You and your crew and your guide are the only people at the abandoned gold mine, so Hoseok can’t have heard footsteps, other than your own- which is what you tell him.

“I think it was the building settling, Hobi,” you say. “This mining warehouse is pretty old.”

“Old and full of ghosts.” Hoseok moans. Jimin readjusts the camera and you know that, without a doubt, he’s zooming in on Hoseok’s terrified face. Namjoon’ll have some fun shots to edit later. Jimin is a very capable cameraman, and also unruffled by ghosts/loud noises/etc, but he does love to catch some interesting angles of the two of you. At least Taehyung refrains from doing that, although he does sometimes get too focused on making a shot artistic rather than capturing the abject terror on Hoseok’s face when it would be a good clip for the final video.

“Well, we don’t know that.” You pause. “Maybe we should test it with the spirit box to find out?”

Hoseok’s face twists and you can’t help but laugh.

The supernatural half of the show wouldn’t exist without Hoseok. Your fans enjoyed his eternal suffering and fear whenever anything remotely spooky was mentioned, so they'd bandied about the idea of a paranormal-themed season and you'd taken the idea on board; the juxtaposition between yourself and your co-host was all the more defined when he was banshee shrieking at some innocuous sound while you stayed calm. You’re open to the concept of the supernatural but have yet to come across any evidence that you find compelling enough to make you a believer, while Hoseok is convinced in the existence of ghosts and finds the idea terrifying.

He doesn’t like the spirit box because of this, but you don’t mind it- although you don't really like the loud static it makes when it’s scanning through radio frequencies, trying to pick up if any spirits or ghouls are trying to talk to you. (They’re not, even if Hoseok insists that the random bursts of sound it spits out are definitely coherent words and sentences, rather than a mish-mash of random rubbish that it just happens to pick from normal radio waves.)

The spirit box, of course, is about as interesting as normal: that is to say, not really at all, though you have a good laugh after you ask for any spirits to give you a name and the only response is ‘pineapple pie’, which makes you feel hungry. Hoseok lets you rummage around in his pocket for a cereal bar, which you end up munching on between shots, as Hoseok swats bugs away from your faces. He attempts to karate chop a mosquito but misses by miles and you almost choke on a mouthful of oats as he makes the world’s most incredulous face and you giggle.

“We should make pineapple pie for a video at some point,” you suggest, and Hoseok is briefly distracted from his fear- he’d given up on the bugs and has been shining his torch over your shoulder at some old generator equipment and casting warped shadows on the walls behind it, dark silhouettes that could admittedly be considered a little spooky. “I’ve never had pineapple pie before.”

“There’s a Filipino bakery near our place that sells it!” Taehyung jumps in before Hoseok can respond, turning away from where he and Jimin have been making shadow puppets on the wall with their own torches. “It’s so good, you should definitely do it.”

Hoseok hums. “Jin-hyung would probably be happy to help out,” he says. You finish the cereal bar and tuck the wrapper back into Hoseok’s pocket, making a mental note to get in touch with the Tasty team member to ask him about it. He’ll leap at the opportunity.

There’s a clattering noise somewhere far in the distance, probably rocks shifting or something, and Hoseok squeaks and crowds even closer to you, as impossible as that is with how he’s already wrapped around your back at this point, the harness for his chest-mounted camera digging into your spine. It’s a familiar sensation by this point. “Please can we get out of here now?”

“Sure,” you say indulgently, stroking Hoseok’s arm where it’s wrapped around your collarbones. “We need to drive down to the mining tunnels now anyway.”

Hoseok keeps hold of your hand as your guide drives you to your location, squeezing your fingers every time the car goes over a bump- which is pretty often on the rocky dirt track. Hoseok’s fairly touchy in general, always holding hands or hugging or kissing people, raining little pecks over their faces, and it had been Very Overwhelming when he’d first turned this attention to you. You’re not, like, not touchy, but back in season 1 you were definitely not used to spending time with someone who loves skinship as much as Hoseok does, and it had taken time for you to stop freezing up every time he casually touched or grabbed you.

It says a lot about how used you are to it now that you don’t even bat an eyelid when he wriggles into your twin bed at the hotel later, curling up around you once he’s finished his meticulous skincare routine. “Your bed is over there, Hobi,” you say, although you immediately snuggle back into him, letting him spoon you. He’s always a lot clingier after you finish filming a supernatural episode- as if you can ward off any ghosts that might have decided to hitch a ride back from wherever you’d come from.

“I know,” Hoseok replies. He hitches a leg over yours, sighing happily when you reach an arm down to rub his calves. He always sleeps better if you massage him.

“I can’t wait to get home.” You dig your fingers into a muscle and Hoseok squirms a little. You huff out a laugh. “Arizona is so hot.”

“You look cute in shorts, though,” Hoseok says. He’s been saying the same thing all day.

“You just like shorts.” He’d been wearing shorts too, pretty much matching his clothes to yours; at this point you’re starting to wonder if he looks through your luggage before he packs his own stuff, because your outfits end up being eerily similar a lot of the time. You think he finds it reassuring, maybe, when you’re somewhere unfamiliar. Or maybe it’s because Hoseok’s fashion has influenced your own over the years. You definitely own a lot more bright clothing than you used to, not to mention the matching items you’ve both purchased together anyway.

Now that you think about it, Hoseok really has been a big influence on you, huh.

He falls asleep pretty soon after, going lax and limp as his breaths deepen and he dozes off. He always falls asleep before you do, awake one second and flat out the next; you envy his ability to drop off like that, usually taking a lot longer yourself, but you do find it good that he’s able to sleep so quickly despite his earlier fear. He always crashes at yours after you finish filming an episode when you’re home, too, otherwise he says he’s up all night with the fear- this is all part and parcel of Hoseok being your co-host and partner on the show, and honestly, you don’t mind it at all.

So you're used to this. When Hoseok makes a little noise in his sleep and starts shifting behind you, you lift his hand to your mouth and gently kiss his knuckles, running your thumb down his wrist- he settles immediately, going lax again. You'll chase away any nightmares with soft touches, shuffling around in his grip and holding him tight if you need to, before eventually drifting off yourself, safe and warm in the circle of his arms.

Even though you usually fall asleep after Hoseok, one thing you have over him is the fact you’re a morning person and find it a lot easier to get up with the sun. Despite your late night, you’re awake moments before your phone alarm starts to ring, turning it off before it can rouse Hoseok out of his sleep. When you slide out of the bed he stirs a little, instinctively reaching out for you in his sleep, and you carefully put a pillow in his arms so he can hold onto that instead; he settles down once he has the pillow hugged to his chest, and you take a moment to look at him fondly and gently kiss his forehead before you start to get ready for the day.

You’re pretty much done by the time Hoseok sits up at the sound of his own alarm, blinking blearily in your direction as you turn it off for him. He’s still holding onto the pillow as he sits up.

“Morning, honey,” you chirp. “You want coffee?”

Hoseok stares at you for a second, eyes squinting as he tries to wake up fully. “Morning,” he replies, voice hoarse from sleep, and you smile. “Please.”

When you’d first found out that Hoseok wasn’t a morning person, you’d honestly been gobsmacked. He’s just so bright and energetic that you figured he rolled out of bed like that- it just makes sense- but it actually takes him a surprisingly long time to get fully up to speed with his normal self. He’s a little slower, a little softer, draping himself over your back as you fiddle with the room's coffee machine to try and get some caffeine into him.

“We can always get some more at the airport,” you say conversationally, and Hoseok hums quietly into your hair before dropping a kiss there. “It’s a shame we don’t have time to eat at the breakfast buffet.”

Despite his morning slowness, he’s still ready on time; he’s always punctual, is your Hoseok. You make up for missing breakfast at the hotel by purchasing tons of snacks for the flight to Pennsylvania, munching a pre-wrapped croissant as you read off your phone while Jimin dozes next to you, his head resting against the window. You’re sandwiched between him and Hoseok, who has the aisle seat- he cranes his head at your pastry and you tilt it against his lips so he can take a bite. You end up with a lapful of crumbs, but that’s okay.

“So where are we off to next?” Hoseok asks once he’s done chewing, peering at your phone screen. Across the aisle from you, Taehyung very loudly unwraps a pain au chocolat, much to the irritation of the woman next to him.

“We’re going to an old prison,” you say, and Hoseok meeps. “A penitentiary, to be exact.”

Taehyung shoves the pain au chocolat into his mouth whole so he has his hands free, fumbling for his phone as he starts to film how the colour drains from Hoseok’s face as you give him a brief synopsis of the prison and other places you’ll be going to while in Pennsylvania. This isn’t even for Unsolved; Taehyung just likes to have video evidence and receipts for everything, if his camera reel is anything to go by. Even though you’re vague with your descriptions- you like Hoseok’s reaction on camera to be as unscripted and natural as it can possibly be, when you finally turn up at your locations and then set up so that you can talk about it- once you’re finished, Hoseok is curled up against you, hiding his face in your neck.

“Why can’t we go somewhere nice for once?” He whines, and you can’t help but laugh.

“Budget doesn’t cover it, that’s why we have to sleep at haunted hotels. They’re cheaper.” Hoseok meeps again, and you relent, lifting your hand to cup the back of his head. “Don’t worry, I won’t abandon you,” you say, stroking his hair as you use your free hand to clumsily scroll through your phone, double checking the details of your planned trip.

“I know.” Hoseok is uncharacteristically quiet against your collarbones. Taehyung gives up filming and rips into another pain au chocolat packet, smiling guiltily at his seat neighbour when she tuts at him. “You never do.”

Despite Hoseok’s fear of a lot of things related to the show, and the fact he jumps and screams at pretty much everything, he’s never asked to bow out or avoid doing something. He even agrees to go into areas alone when the two of you try to ‘make contact’ with spirits, even though he’s obviously terrified- but each and every time before you part, you promise that you’re not going anywhere and you’ll be waiting right outside for him. You would never abandon Hoseok (even though ghosts probably aren’t real and he has nothing to worry about), and he knows that, and takes strength from it. It warms you.

He keeps his head nestled against your neck for a beat longer, and then smacks a loud kiss against your skin, which makes you squeal and slap him away while he laughs.

As fun as it is to jet around the country- especially with Hoseok and the other guys- it's also exhausting, and there’s always something nice about coming home. Even though the increased budget that you’ve been allocated as the show’s been growing in popularity means that you can stay at nicer hotels now, your own bed is still the most comfortable place in the world. (Well, tied with Hoseok’s bed, thinking about it. The two are basically interchangeable at this point anyway, if you consider how often Hoseok ends up sleeping at your apartment and squirreling his way under your blankets as you’re trying to sleep.)

On the other hand, though, in spite of a return to your regular creature comforts, coming home still involves work: there are Q&As to be filmed, footage to edit, later episodes to plan, research to be done. As the original progenitor of Unsolved you take the brunt of the last two parts; Hoseok is the one who reacts to the facts you throw out, he’s not the one who investigates the different things you talk about on the show, but he’s always there to support you and talk to you whenever you need it.

(Your audience knows Hoseok as someone who is cute and bright and cheerful, but he’s also quietly thoughtful and surprisingly serious when he has to be. That’s the side of him that you get to see whenever you stay late at the office, your desk lamp the only one left on in the room, hunched over your keyboard as you trawl through conspiracy threads in the deep bowels of the internet that are discussing who D.B. Cooper is. You love loud Hoseok, of course, but you appreciate this hushed part of him, too- the way he'll deliver you a hot chocolate with a kiss to your forehead before quietly sitting beside you and waiting for you to finish so he can take you home.)

Anyway. Coming home means coming back to the office, means putting in shifts at BigHit headquarters, etc, etc, all that jazz, so here you are, sitting on Hoseok’s lap and scrolling through your tablet as he does something of his own on his PC. The first time this had happened, it had raised eyebrows- not because it was considered inappropriate or anything, as BigHit is the kind of place where people can make out in hallways to ‘test the longevity of this 24 hour lipstick’ for a video and no one bats an eyelash, but because up until this point, you’d been renowned for pretty much being glued to your desk while working. But you like Hoseok and his energy, even when he’s not doing anything, and his lap is comfortable, even if he doesn’t exactly have the world’s thickest thighs. You work better when you’re around him.

You’re scrolling through Instagram comments for questions to answer in this week’s Q&A episode when someone clears their throat. Both you and Hoseok look up in tandem to find Seokjin standing there, looking decidedly more grey-haired than he had the last time you’d seen him. He pulls it off effortlessly, of course.

“What’s up, silver fox?” You let your tablet droop into your lap as Hoseok takes his hands off his mouse and keyboard and secures them around your waist instead, so you don’t slide off his legs. His hands are warm where they splay across your stomach and you can feel the bumps and texture of his bracelets through the material of your shirt. “Liking the new look, by the way.”

“You look really good, Jin-hyung,” Hoseok says from over your shoulder, and you nod in agreement.

“I know.” Jin sounds flippant but he seems pleased. He doesn’t say anything more than that, though, and just looks at the two of you expectantly. You both blink back at him.

“So… did you come over just to be complimented, or?” You slowly start to lift your tablet, acting as if you’re about to start reading off your screen again. “Were the thirsty comments on your latest video not enough for you today?”

Jin raises an eyebrow as he pretends to inspect his nails. “No, no, there were plenty of comments, as always,” he says loftily. Unsurprising, considering his unofficial(/basically official) title of Most Handsome Face in the office as well as the leagues of fans he has. He lets his hand drop as he quickly gives up pretending to be aloof. “So when are you planning to fit making pineapple pie into your schedule?”

“Oh!” Hoseok squeezes you in his excitement and you wiggle a little in his lap. “I almost forgot about that! Did Tae mention it to you?”

“Jimin too. They burst into the kitchen while I was filming and they were both holding a piece of Filipino pineapple pie aloft like they were wielding Excalibur, so, yes, you can say that it was mentioned,” Jin says, and you can’t help but wince. Being interrupted while filming is one thing, but the Tasty studio can be hazardous on top of that (y’know, what with the knives and fire and stuff), so you can only hope that Jin wasn’t using a mandolin or something when they had appeared.

“Oof.” You wiggle your hips again and Hoseok immediately catches your drift, turning his chair so the two of you are facing Jin fully rather than having to turn your heads to look at him. Jin makes a weird expression, something you can’t put a name to, but it slips away too fast for you to catch properly- maybe he just had a sudden chill or something, who knows. “Sorry about them. How about I email you our filming schedule and you can see when you’re free as well? We were going to film a 70th episode retrospective soon and the pineapple pie video might be a nice sort of bonus on top of that.”

Jin agrees easily. You use your tablet to open the Google Calendar that you have with Hoseok, which makes Jin pause when he notices. “You share a GCal?”

“Duh?” You flick a look at Jin through your lashes. You and Hoseok have GCal where you input your work schedules to avoid potential clashes when you need to film together, but you also put in other plans the two of you have outside of work, if it’s ever necessary. “Why wouldn’t we? It makes it easier when we need to plan things for Unsolved.”

“Uh-huh.” Jin sounds sceptical, but you decide not to address it. You miss the look he gives Hoseok as you scroll through your calendar, the two men having a silent exchange as you start to draft an email. Somewhere across the office you hear Yoongi shout out an expletive and two sets of cackling laughter that sound suspiciously like Taehyung and Jungkook; you and Hoseok turn at the sound, but you don’t spot anything from where you’re sat. “Alright, I think that’s my cue to leave,” Jin says, and promptly dips before he gets dragged into whatever’s going on.

Whatever shenanigans Jungkook and Taehyung have gotten up to seem to be pinpointed to one area, so you avoid any fall out, and Hoseok eventually excuses himself to go to the toilet. You take over his chair while he’s gone. Asides from yourself, both computers at this desk are entirely abandoned- Yoongi is still absent, nowhere to be seen- and you’re tapping away at your tablet when all of a sudden you have a camera shoved in your face.

For once it’s not Jimin or Taehyung or Jungkook, and instead when you look up you see Irene and Seulgi, the latter girl beaming at you while Irene holds the camera. Seulgi says your name and points at you with a perfectly manicured nail, and you blink at her, completely caught off guard. Irene zooms in on your bewildered expression.

“Um, hey guys,” you say. “What’s up? Need me for something?”

“We wanted to ask if you wanted to guest star in the next Ladylike video!” Seulgi chirps brightly, and you’re immediately on guard. While the offer seems innocent enough on the surface you can’t help but wonder if the next video is one of their wilder ones (you don’t care if the underwear is silver-infused and apparently wicks away smell and moisture, you flat out refuse to wear the same panties for a whole week). Fortunately your fears are assuaged when Seulgi seems to read your mind and answers your question before you have the chance to ask it. “We’re trying to recreate elaborate Instagram makeup looks with dollar store makeup.”

Irene giggles behind the camera when you visibly relax. “I’m in, that sounds fun,” you say, and both girls seem inordinately pleased. “Um, when are you planning to shoot it?”

“Tomorrow! It won’t take long, we promise,” Seulgi says. “You just need to be free for filming, we’ll do all the editing and stuff.”

You finalise the exact time you need to be available by and by the time Hoseok comes back from the toilet both girls have just gone. You stand up so that he can reclaim his seat, eyes glued to your tablet as you open up your Google Calendar so you can put the Ladylike video filming in, but you’re interrupted when Hoseok grabs you. You squeal in surprise when he tugs you back down rather than letting you sit down yourself, tablet getting sandwiched between the two of you as you end up straddling him in a desperate attempt to catch your balance- but before you can resituate yourself he starts to tickle you and you end up laughing uproariously into his face.

“Cute, cute, my Y/n is so cute,” he sing-songs, and you continue to laugh as you try to bat his hands away.

“Stop, oh my God, Hobi!” There are tears of laughter in the corners of your eyes as you squirm in his lap, trying to get away from his hands but being prevented from doing so by the desk at your back; you’re trapped between it and Hoseok, entirely at his mercy as the two of you giggle at each other.

“You realise other people work here, right?”

Yoongi has finally reappeared. He sounds disgruntled, but you put it down to the fact he has KITTY AVAILABLE FOR ADOPTION and a phone number scrawled across his face in what appears to be permanent marker, rather than at the fact that you and Hoseok are making noise. As Hoseok’s deskmate he’s used to this sort of behaviour by now.

“Hey hyung,” Hoseok says, shameless as his fingers continue to dance up and down your sides, although the touches are light enough now that you can turn your attention away from giggling to appreciate Yoongi’s new look. “Did you have a good nap?”

“A cat nap,” you say, and then giggle at the unimpressed look Yoongi throws your way- it’s hard to find him scary with the multi-coloured letters scribbled over his face.

He grunts as he sits down. “I’ll kill those kids,” he says, but there’s no real heat behind his words, and he slumps into his chair with a resigned sigh. “I kept scrubbing at my face but this shit won’t come off.”

You exchange a look with Hoseok, the two of you thinking about the hand sanitiser you keep in your handbag- the alcoholic gel would probably lift the ink off Yoongi’s face, but neither of you offer up this information. “I’m sure it’ll come off by tomorrow,” you say, and Yoongi makes a hopeful noise at the back of this throat. "Any particular reason why you've decided to act as a walking billboard for abandoned cats?"

"Thing 1 and Thing 2 said they were raising awareness for a local cat shelter and asked if I wanted to help. I said yes." Yoongi sounds rueful.

"I feel very aware of it, hyung, so I'd say they did a good job." Hoseok laughs when Yoongi just flips him off.

Hoseok’s hands have gone still by this point. It’s not until Yoongi starts to tap at his keyboard that you remember the position you’re in, straddling Hoseok in his chair, your hands on his shoulders and his hands on your waist as you lean back against his desk- but as questionable and potentially incriminating as this entire situation seems out of context, literally no one is batting an eyelid. People are used to seeing this sort of thing from you two, both comfortable and not awkward with each other at all.

Hoseok's hands are warm and steady where they wrap around your waist. You're struck again by how large they feel- supportive, as always, when he holds you.

"Mind letting me go, cowboy?" You say. "I should go back to my desk to get some work done."

"You're more of a cowboy in this situation," Hoseok says, wiggling his eyebrows at you. "Seeing as you're the one that's doing the riding."

"Good lord," Yoongi mutters.

You laugh at the expression on his face before Hoseok wheels you both away from the desk so that you have room to swing your legs off him. "That's dirty, Hobi," you say, but it's said with a smile and wink.

After you've disappeared, waving at the two men, Yoongi raises an eyebrow at Hoseok. "I know you two are basically married at this point, but can you try and rein in the flirting when I'm trying to work?"

"We weren't flirting," Hoseok protests. Yoongi looks unconvinced, his other eyebrow rising to match the first, and just shakes his head before he resumes Googling ways to get the permanent marker off his face.

Irene’s touch is light as she puts the makeup onto your face, surveying her work critically as she does.

“Alright, that’s the foundation done,” she says, once everything seems to have passed whatever rigorous criteria she has. “So we're onto the concealer next.”

There’s something soothing about having someone else do your makeup. Not to mention that you don’t have to worry at all about the production of the video- with your usual projects, your level of investment means that there’s always something to think about, but right now all you have to do is sit there and look pretty. You do listen and react whenever Irene shows you the products and so on, but otherwise, you are literally just sitting there and letting the other woman put stuff on your face; you can relax and unwind and let her take the lead.

Irene has just finished blending the concealer under your eyes when your phone vibrates in your pocket. While she's rummaging for the next product- setting powder- you quickly check your phone to see if it's anything important. It's Hoseok, asking where you are, because he has a coffee and Danish pastry for you and he can't find you; you realise then that you never put the Ladylike video filming into your calendar, distracted by Hoseok grabbing you, and today you'd just disappeared without telling him where you were going. Oops.

You quickly shoot him a reply before Irene starts to brush the powder across your face and you're both surprised at how well it sets. "Your skin is so nice," Irene says with a smile, sweeping the brush over your cheeks. You try not to laugh when the bristles tickles your face, flattered at her comment.

She's just finished doing your brows when you hear the studio door open and you catch sight of Hoseok. He's staying off camera next to Wendy so he doesn't get in the shot, quiet and unobtrusive, but you can't help but perk up when you see him. Although you stay silent so that it doesn’t interrupt the filming, Irene notices how you brighten and pauses in her motions to look over where Hoseok is standing.

"Hi, Hoseok." Much to your surprise, despite the fact that the cameras are rolling, Irene still greets Hoseok. You thought she'd make him wait until you were done. "You're here for Y/n, I presume?"

"I have a coffee for her," Hoseok says, a little sheepish, holding up an iced macchiato and a paper bag that's got a small grease stain spreading on it, a tantalising glimpse of the deliciousness inside. "I just came to drop it off?"

"I don't deserve you, Hobi," you say, beaming, and he smiles back at you.

Irene gestures for Hoseok to come into the frame. There’s a brief moment where you and Hoseok exchange a small, surprised look- Irene is rummaging through eyeshadow palettes and seems like she’s still going through with the video even though Hoseok is about to walk on set- but he acquiesces and steps into the shot. Irene points at the Instagram photo she has open on her iPad, which is propped on the table so she can use it for reference and zoom in if necessary. “We’re doing this look with dollar store products."

“Woah,” Hoseok says, leaning down to peer at the picture, and he sounds suitably awed. “That’s really nice. You’ve chosen one with all of Y/n’s favourite colours.”

“It’s cute, right?” You’re so excited to see the final product, even if it ends up not looking as good as what you can see on the screen, considering the cheapness of the makeup that Irene is using.

“Not as cute as you,” Hoseok says, and you blow him a kiss before looking at the iced macchiato in his hands meaningfully.

“Coffee, coffee?” You sound hopeful but Irene tuts.

“You’ll need to keep your eyes shut while I do your eyeshadow,” she says.

Before you can begin to feel disappointed, Hoseok comes to the rescue. “Don’t worry baby, I’ve got you.”

And so that’s how you end up with Hoseok holding the straw of your iced coffee up to your lips while Irene applies the different shades and shimmers to your eyelids, your eyes shut as she does so; Hoseok makes appropriate ooh-ing noises, bowled over by how she manages to blend the cheap eyeshadows before doing a cut crease- you have to keep your eyes shut the whole time, letting the concealer dry on your lids so that it doesn’t smudge, gauging how it looks based on Hoseok's reactions.

Every so often Hoseok will make a small noise and then you’ll feel the straw press up against your lips, and you’ll take a sip of your drink while Irene is switching colours or brushes; you feel thoroughly pampered today and you’re enjoying it immensely. She’s been describing the different products and their quality to the camera throughout the whole video, but now that Hoseok’s there, he responds to what she’s saying, making her giggle with how enthusiastic he is despite not recognising all the terminology she’s using. Although your eyes are shut you can't help but smile: that's your Hoseok, always lightening the atmosphere and making people laugh.

“Alright, you can open your eyes,” Irene says after what feels like a lifetime. The liquid eyeliner has dried by the time your eyes flutter open, the stark blackness against the expertly blended eyeshadows the first thing you notice when you look at yourself in the mirror.

“Woah, Irene! This is incredible!" You turn your head from side to side, taking in how different your eyes look after the ministrations of Irene's skilled hands. "Hobi, look at those wings! I wish I could get mine that even.” You don’t often wear liquid liner and when you do it takes you eons to get them to match, making each side bigger as you try to match the other- most of the time you just give up.

“You do look incredible,” Hoseok agrees. You look away from the mirror to smile brightly at him and then take another drink of coffee when he lifts it back up to your lips; the straw makes loud slurping noises as you reach the bottom of the cup and you end up sucking up more air than liquid, much to your disappointment. He chuckles at the look on your face but then coos when you pout.

“I’m not done just yet, you know,” Irene says, unperturbed by your interactions. You wonder how this footage is going to turn out after the edit. “We still have lips and cheeks to do.”

Despite the fact your coffee is finished, Hoseok still remains next to you and watches Irene work. She lines your lips and then paints them a pleasant nude colour, before going in with an extra touch to your contour, and blush, and highlight (you’re genuinely in awe at the selection of makeup you can apparently get for a dollar each). There are so many steps involved in the execution of this look and you wonder how long it would take you to try and do this yourself, before deciding there aren’t enough hours in the day, even if Irene makes it look easy, finishing your face with a flourish.

“Alright, done!”

You pick the mirror up to tilt your head at different angles. You catch the way the highlight shimmers on your cheekbones and cupid’s bow, the way your eyes look after they’ve been shaded with colour and glitter, the sharpness of your brows, the fullness of your lips.

“I can’t believe this was all dollar store makeup,” you say, awestruck. “It’s so much like the photo! I look so good.”

“Irene had an already perfect canvas to work with,” Hoseok says, and you end up smiling so widely your eyes almost squeeze shut.

“Flatterer,” you say.

“You two are so cute.” Seulgi sighs wistfully from behind the cameras and Wendy muffles a quiet cough into her palm.

Irene asks for your opinions on the makeup- you, moreso on how it feels on your face, and Hoseok, if he thinks it looks close to the Instagram photo (he does, but he's clearly biased because you're involved, which he doesn't try to hide). Once the cameras have been cut and everything has been wrapped up, Irene says you can go and so you hop off your chair. Before you can get too far, though, Hoseok stops you, touching his fingers gently under your chin.

“Let me have a proper look.”

You immediately relax and let him tip your head slowly from one side to the other, eyes scanning across your makeup, which feels a lot heavier than you’d expected, but you’re still happy with how nice it is.

“Wah, so beautiful,” Hoseok says, a small smile on his face; it’s one of his softer ones, one that doesn’t show his teeth or his dimples, but rather squeezes his eyes into crescents, his gaze warm. Still blinding but in a different way.

“Irene did a really good job, didn’t she?” You say, enthused. Hoseok pauses, but then his teeth show as the smile grows.

“Yeah, she did.”

"Maybe I should get her to give me makeup lessons so I can look prettier more often." You've never been all too great at the more refined parts of makeup- blending eyeshadow or contouring, for example- but maybe you should add it to your repertoire, you muse.

Hoseok's smile dims as he becomes oddly sombre, hand shifting to cup the bottom of your chin so your face is gently cradled in his hand. "You're gorgeous all the time, makeup or not," he says. "Makeup is fun and you do look great but please don't think you need it to be pretty."

A shy smile plays at your lips. You feel bashful but you can't hide from Hoseok's gaze when he's holding onto you like this, but it wouldn’t matter even if you did. Hoseok knows you well enough to read your moods if you attempt to hide them- but because you trust him you don’t try to.

"Ahh, you're too sweet to me, Hoseok," you murmur. He always compliments you, but the thing with Hoseok is that he always means it, and although you should be used to it, it still catches you off guard every time.

"You deserve it." The soft smile has returned to his face and he lets his fingers drop away from your chin to tangle with yours to lead you out of the studio. “Now come on, you still have your pastry to eat.”

“I totally forgot about that! Oh, but I’ll probably smudge my lipstick.” Your sudden excitement about food dips instantly as you realise this. “I mean, I doubt dollar store stuff has much staying power anyway, but it’ll definitely smear onto the pastry, like, immediately.”

“I’ll cut it up into small pieces for you,” Hoseok says, and you make a noise of happiness as the door to the Ladylike studio shuts behind you both.

Seulgi and Wendy and Irene all look at each other, the two of you all but forgetting that they'd been standing there and had thus witnessed that entire exchange in excruciating detail. Wendy and Seulgi both open their mouths but before they can speak Irene holds up a hand. “I know,” she says. “Trust me. I know.”

Around the office, Jin might be renowned for his silliness, propensity towards dad jokes and loud laughter, but on set- while he’s still very much himself- he’s a professional and takes safety in the kitchen Very Seriously.

“If you damage any of my equipment with your clumsy fingers, I will grate so much parmesan down your throat that you die of cheese asphyxiation.”

“Sounds kinky,” Hoseok laughs, but then he jumps behind you when Jin brandishes a decorative pineapple at him as if he’s about to brain the other man.

“Babe, I’m not about to explain to your family that your final words were, and I quote, ‘sounds kinky’, especially if it was before Jin offed you via fermented dairy products,” you say, although you still shield Hoseok with your body- as if there was any chance you’d be able to stop Jin if he was on the warpath. His shoulders are so broad. Still, you’d fight him for Hoseok if you had to.

“My family love you, I think they’d be okay with it,” Hoseok says from behind you. Jin makes a weird expression with his face before he sets the pineapple back down onto the table next to the rest of your equipment, raising his eyebrows at something; before you can ask what’s up, you’re distracted by the sensation of Hoseok’s hands coming to rest on your shoulders. “It’s okay, Jin, Y/n and I cook together all the time. We won’t mess up.”

“Hobi’s really good at cooking,” you pipe up, and Hoseok affectionately nuzzles at the crown of your head. You cook dinner together at least once a week, trying to use different recipes each time- cooking is a great hobby because you get food at the end of it, and cooking with Hoseok is especially great because you get an excuse to break out the candles and fancy tablecloth your mother had gifted you, even if your food is something simple.

(You never thought you’d learn multiple ways to fold a napkin, but Hoseok is always so excited whenever he sees you start to crimp them into shape, so you like to mix things up for him.)

Jin’s face shifts back into that look that you’re starting to think looks like he’s eaten something that he’s not sure if he likes or not- a little disbelieving, perplexed, resigned. You never get a chance to ask why, though: Jin claps his hands and tells you to put on your aprons so you can start filming, and you eagerly pull it over your head before helping Hoseok tie his behind his back. (Jin makes the face again, but you’re too busy tying a cute bow to notice.)

Jin seems genuinely impressed when it turns out that the two of you have been telling the truth. Of course, the Tasty team member is directing you and giving instructions so it’s not as difficult as it might be otherwise, but he ends up surprisingly uninvolved with the physical part of the process; you and Hoseok hand jobs off to each other and work in tandem to prepare the dough and filling, and once the pie is in the oven you even begin to clean everything up unprompted, moving around each other with an unconscious level of ease.

Jin just ends up sitting on a stool and watching you do his ‘minion work’ although you think he just doesn’t want to get in the way. Hoseok hipchecks you gently and then giggles when you pretend to be pushed back by the strength of the motion and flop dramatically over the sink.

“How often do you two cook together?” Although the question is technically directed at the both of you, for some reason you get the feeling that Jin is aiming this more towards Hoseok, who answers him.

“Usually two or three times a week,” Hoseok says.

“Hmm. I see.” Jin looks thoughtful, and you can’t help but feel like there’s something you’re missing in this simple question and answer exchange. Hoseok has an expression on his face that you’ve never seen before- which you’d thought was impossible, because you know Hoseok inside and out, and it’s confusing. You feel surprisingly unsettled by it.

Your best friend seems like he’s trying to cut whatever tension’s in the air by turning his attention back to tidying up, but he fumbles when he goes to shut a drawer and catches his fingers. He’s barely had time to make a small ow noise before you’re there, lifting his hand and inspecting it carefully. “Stop distracting my boy, Jin, let him focus on cleaning up your messy ass kitchen,” you say.

“Excuse you, my kitchen is a temple, it’s only a mess because you’ve been in here,” Jin says primly.

“Sounds like something a messy person would say.” You would roll your eyes but they’re focused on the reddened skin of Hoseok’s fingers. They just look slightly pinched, nothing major, but still. You’re careful when you touch him. You don’t want him to hurt any further. “Are you okay, baby?”

“No.” He sniffles and his lip wobbles dramatically and you laugh. You do what you always do when Hoseok hurts himself in some small, superficial way- you lift his hand to your lips and gently kiss the fingers he’d gotten caught, inflamed skin already fading back to its usual colour, pain clearly already gone.

“There,” you declare. “All better.”

Hoseok’s expression is warm and tender as he looks at you, his fingers still cradled in yours as you look up from your touching hands, and your gazes lock. There’s a brief moment of stillness, a second that starts to crystallise into something more, and you’d swear his face had just started inching forwards when there’s suddenly an almighty clattering noise from behind you and you both jump, the moment broken.

“Oops,” Jin says blithely. You turn around to discover that all the pineapple related knick-knacks and decor on the table are now scattered on the floor around him, a tangle of paper decorations and plastic fruit that’s rolling across the room. “I seem to have slipped.”

“Weren’t you just going on about how messy we were?” You raise an eyebrow at him, but you’ve already turned away from Hoseok to squat down and help Jin tidy up, chasing down an errant pineapple. You don’t see the pointed look that Jin gives Hoseok behind your back, and when you turn around with the over-large pineapple clutched in your arms, both men seem to be acting like normal. “I’m going to pay Namjoon to keep that in the final cut so everyone can see how chaotic you are in the kitchen.”

“Joonie would never betray me like that,” Jin says with completely unearned confidence, just like he does with most things- but the sad thing is, he’s right. Namjoon is too much of a professional to keep unnecessary shots in the video, and besides, Jin seems able to get away with being outrageously chaotic because he’s so charming and pulls it off so well. If the footage of him somehow sending everything to the floor was kept in the video, people would probably love it.

Once the pie is done cooking and has finally cooled enough for Jin to cut it into triangular shapes, you’re so excited to eat it that you’re bouncing up and down on the spot a little. Hoseok is too. Jin humours your excitement with understanding- he loves to eat too- although he raises his eyebrows at the way you and Hoseok lock your arms together before you lean forward to take a bite of the pineapple pie. You let out a muffled little groan into the pastry once it finally touches your tongue, sweet tartness of the pineapple exploding across your tastebuds, pastry buttery and flakey as it melts in your mouth.

“Jin, this is so good,” you say, and Hoseok hums around a mouthful of fruit filling in agreement.

“I think your ghost was onto something,” Jin says. He’s already polished off his slice, while you and Hoseok are barely halfway through your own, disentangling your arms so you can focus on eating properly. Sometimes you wonder if Jin just unhinges his jaw and swallows things whole because you’ve never seen someone who can eat as quickly as he can. “They could see you pining.”

Your face twists in confusion. “What?”

“You know… pining… like a pineapple,” Jin says, before giggling to himself like he’s just told the world’s funniest joke. You raise your eyebrows at Hoseok, but then you take another bite of the pie and immediately forget about Jin’s cryptic nonsense.

“This is so good, isn’t it, Hobi?” You ask.

“It’s so sweet and light and delicious,” Hoseok says. “It’s the best thing I’ve ever tasted.”

“I thought we were talking about the pie, not me, Hoseok,” Jin says, and then lets out peals of squeaky laughter when you roll your eyes.

“You’re incorrigible.”

“I think you can get a cream for that,” Jin continues to laugh, before you throw a paper pineapple at him.

There’s still pie left over the next day. Of course, you’ve saved slices for the rest of your crew. Jimin and Taehyung are snacking on slices of pie as they help each other set up the cameras and mics in the studio, making sure the lighting hits you and Hoseok so that you stand out against the room behind you. Today’s the day you’ve set aside to film the 70th episode, and you’re excited for the chance to do an official retrospective of the show so that you can look back at all the places you’ve been to and the things you’ve discussed, as well as plans for the future.

“Did the two of you coordinate your outfits for the video?” Tae says curiously, and you glance down at your clothes. It’s only then you realise that- although your outfit is darker than his- there are flowers on Hoseok’s bomber jacket and your dress is covered in a floral pattern.

“Huh, I didn’t even notice,” you mutter as you pluck at your dress. “Guess we’re just telepathic.”

Hoseok stays silent, strangely enough, but when you hold your hand up for a high five he responds enthusiastically and continues to grip your hand afterwards, which makes you laugh. “That’s friendship,” he says, and you laugh again, squeezing his hand.

The two of you keep laughing as the cameras start to roll, watching the clips from your most popular episodes so far, between answering commonly asked questions from fans- one of the more frequently asked being ‘why did Hoseok agree to be a co-host when he always seems scared during filming and screams all the time?’

You read this question off your list and Hoseok’s answer is immediate. “Y/n is one of the hardest workers I know,” he says. “So I was excited to be invited on board for a show that she had created. And I wouldn’t say that I’m always screaming-”

“Yeah, when you have to pause to breathe,” you interject, and he laughs.

“Sure,” he says indulgently. “But, honestly, when Y/n is there it’s easy to forget that we’re standing in some terrifying old building or haunted tomb or whatever.” You rest your chin on your hand as you watch him continue to speak. “I would honestly be a lot more scared if she wasn’t there. She’s very good at distracting me if I’m getting too worried. She’s very comforting.”

“That’s a nice way of saying that I’m basically a defence mechanism for you.”

“Basically.” Hoseok grins at you so widely, teeth on show, gorgeous.

Now that he mentions it, it’s true that as your friendship has grown, his fear has ebbed; although he still screams as loudly as before, it happens less often, but because sudden noises and jump scares always startle him, it still happens a lot. If you don’t take the time to reflect it’s kind of easy to forget how your friendship has grown over time, which is why it’s another good reason to have this retrospective- for the sake of the series, sure, but your relationship with Hoseok has grown as the show has, too.

When you flip over the final page to read the final question, you’re surprised to see an extra one tacked onto the end- you’d been the one to select them, after all, and this one has been added after the fact, someone’s messy handwriting scratched across the paper. You don’t recognise the writing. Honestly it kind of looks like someone had written it with their non-dominant hand to avoid detection, almost like a child’s writing from a cartoon, all but missing the backward E’s- but the question is pretty innocuous, so you figure you may as well answer it. You can just ask Namjoon to cut the footage later if you don’t like it.

“Y/n: If Hoseok decided to quit being your co-host, who would you want to replace him?” You squint at the paper as you decipher the scrawl, not seeing how Jimin and Taehyung exchange a sly, down-low high five off camera. “Huh.”

“You started the series with Yoongi, right?” Hoseok pipes up. “Would you bring him back?”

You’d chosen Yoongi as your original co-host for Unsolved because you vibed well and had pretty similar opinions when it came to a lot of things, and you’d worked well together in the past, but the truth is that- “No, I wouldn’t,” you say immediately. Hoseok seems genuinely surprised. “Honestly, if you stopped co-hosting with me, that would be the end of Unsolved. Hoseok and I are a package deal at this point and I would never consider filming the show without him.”

Hoseok looks stunned, but you keep going. “The show wouldn’t exist without Hoseok. Yoongi was great for the videos he was in, but- even if he didn’t have other commitments, he couldn’t take over from Hobi. Unsolved isn’t just a show about the supernatural, or crimes, it’s about us dealing with the supernatural or true crimes,” you continue, and then your nose wrinkles as you realise what you’ve said. “Well, we don’t directly deal with true crimes, fortunately. I’d make a terrible detective. My hand isn’t steady enough to draw one of those chalk outlines, y’know? I’d probably just end up drawing someone who looked suspiciously like Kirby. Anyway, Hoseok is my best friend as well as my co-host; if you get one of us, you get both of us, and if you don’t get both of us, you get neither of us.”

“I love you, Y/n,” Hoseok says. It’s not the first time he’s said this to you, but you think it’s the first time he’s ever said it on camera, and his tone is strangely earnest. He must be getting really nostalgic about the start of the show if it’s making him sound like that.

“Love you too, Hobi.” You beam at him. “I’m really glad we became friends.”

Behind the cameras, Taehyung makes a weird croaking sound and Jimin hits him hard on the arm.

“Uh, normally when someone's choking you hit them on the back, Minnie,” you say.

“I’m not choking, I’m fine,” Taehyung wheezes. Jimin punches him again.

“Uh-huh.” You raise an eyebrow. “Anyway. What was I saying. Oh! Yeah, referring back to the question- while I would never stop him if he thought it was the right thing to do, I certainly hope that Hobi doesn’t want to quit being a co-host.”

“I would never.” Hoseok’s expression is weirdly intense as he says this and you can’t help but laugh.

“Good! I’m glad we’re both in it for the long haul.”

Taehyung still looks kind of constipated once filming is over, but before you can ask him what’s up, Jimin pulls him to the corner of the room and the two men exchange some quiet words. They seem oddly serious and you purse your lips as you try to work out what’s going on, but then Hoseok’s hand slips into yours and your attention is drawn away from them.

“Celebratory 70th episode filming dinner?”

“I thought we were going to have a celebratory dinner with our minions when the episode actually aired,” you say, tilting your head at Taehyung and Jimin. “Didn’t you put it in the GCal?”

“I meant just you and me,” Hoseok says, squeezing your hand gently. “A co-host only dinner.”

“Ooh, we’re in an exclusive club, are we?” You giggle and squeeze his hand back. “Sure, why not. Can we have pizza? I’m feeling like pizza.”

“You can have anything you want, baby,” Hoseok answers, affection written across all his features. You go all wobbly inside, your insides melting into a puddle of goo at how warm and tender he is. You love your best friend so much. “Let’s leave those two to it, it seems like they’re busy.”

You look back over at your cameramen. Jimin has his cheeks puffed out and Taehyung looks chagrined. You purse your lips again, a little unsure if you should leave them if they’re having some sort of disagreement, but then Hoseok slips his hand out of yours and crouches down in a way that you recognise instantly. You make a noise of happiness and leap up, letting him lift you into a piggyback; you lock your arms around his neck and start to giggle as he bounces you a little, getting his hands comfortable under your calves.

“We’re off!” Hoseok announces. Jimin and Taehyung look away from their discussion to the two of you, their expressions both mirrors of each other as their eyebrows rise in unison when they spot how Hoseok is carrying you. “We’ll leave you to tidy the studio.”

“Enjoy the rest of the pie!” You wiggle your fingers at them in a little wave before squealing when Hoseok hitches you up his back again without warning, tightening your grip on him. “Pizza time, Hobi, let’s go.”

“Your wish is my command, princess,” Hoseok says, waggling his eyebrows in a way that makes you laugh before you bury your head in his hair, stifling your giggles against his scalp. He smells so nice and soft and lovely, familiar, like home.

“Wow, they’re unbelievable,” Jimin whispers behind you, though you don’t hear him, more focused on not bumping your head in the doorway as Hoseok walks you both out of the studio.

You end up going to your favourite pizzeria, sitting at your usual booth in the corner. You’ve been here so many times with Hoseok that you don’t need to look at the menu and just order your usual half-and-half, feeding each other slices of garlic bread and struggling with the gooey, molten cheese that seems to stretch endlessly from your slices of pizza. You feel warm and comfortable, your feet brushing under the small table whenever you shift your legs, laughing each time Hoseok traps your foot under his before letting you go.

“I can’t believe we’ve done 70 episodes,” you say, leaning back against the smooth leather of the booth seat after you’ve stolen a sip of Hoseok’s Sprite. “I never thought we’d get this far. I honestly thought you’d have died of fright by now,” you tease, swinging your leg gently against his.

“If I die, I’ll haunt you from beyond the grave,” Hoseok says, pulling a face at you that’s clearly meant to be ghoulish, and you laugh.

“I’ll take the spirit box home from work so you can talk to me.” You lean your elbow on the table and rest your chin on your palm, still smiling. “Obviously you’d do the same for me, right?”

“As long as you kept other ghosts away from it,” Hoseok says, shivering. “I don’t want to have to talk to them too.”

“I promise. I’ll be the only thing haunting you, don’t worry.”

Hoseok smiles at you, eyes warm. "I wouldn't have it any other way."

You share a banana split for dessert. You’re pretty full so Hoseok eats the majority of it, which gives you the opportunity to watch him, the way his dimples appear when he chews; you must have watched him eat a thousand times but you’re never any less endeared by the sight.

“I meant what I said, you know,” you say suddenly, and Hoseok looks up, cheeks bulging with ice cream and banana.

“Hmrh?” He makes a noise of questioning around his mouthful of food, and you laugh when you spot a smear of chocolate sauce on his chin. You swipe it away with your thumb before mindlessly sucking it off, too distracted by the sweetness bursting across your tongue to notice how Hoseok stares at the motion with wide eyes. He swallows. “What?”

“When I said that I was glad that we became friends,” you say. “When I first asked you to star in an episode I never thought we’d end up here, you know? But… I’m really happy. And I really do love you a lot, Hoseok.”

Hoseok smiles all the time. In fact, you’d say he spends more time smiling than he doesn’t, happiness always radiating from his face like sunlight shining down from the sky, golden and bright- but the smile he gives you right now is softer than that. It’s more like the softness of the sunrise, spilling over you through just-opened curtains, warm and gentle and comforting.

“I love you too, Y/n,” he says. “More than anything.”

You put a hand over your face as you giggle bashfully at the earnest look on his face. “Stop,” you whine. “You’re so cheesy, oh my God.”

“You said it first,” Hoseok points out, but he starts to laugh along with you, before the server comes over to give you your bill and you end up fighting over who pays- Hoseok wins, much to your disappointment, but lets you front the tip as a compromise.

As always he catches the subway with you and holds your hand all the way home, only letting go when you get to the door of your apartment building. “I’ll see you tomorrow morning,” he says, and you glance up from where you’ve been rummaging in your bag for your keys.

“Bright and early as always,” you reply, smiling. “I’ll make sure to bring your casserole dish back tomorrow, it’s still on my counter. I’ll make you some lunch to make up for how long I’ve kept it.”

“Okay.” Hoseok watches as you finally unearth your keys, jingling them triumphantly as you do. “Baby?”

“Hm?” You look up from where you’ve been fitting the keys into the lock. “Yes?”

“I meant it when I said it, too.” He looks oddly sombre, none of the usual levity on his face. “I love you more than anything, Y/n.”

Your heart seizes in your chest, stuttering a little at his tone and his expression. He’s told you that he loves you, sure, and you always say it back, but Hoseok’s never said it like this: like there’s more meaning behind his words than normal. You’re staring at him with wide eyes, frozen in place, key still pressed into the lock- but before you can gather your thoughts Hoseok’s face is morphing into his usual smile before he dips forwards and kisses you on the forehead.

“Alright, I’ll see you tomorrow! Don’t forget the casserole dish!”

And then he’s bouncing down the steps just like he always does, turning momentarily to give you a jaunty wave before walking briskly back in the direction of the subway.

“See you tomorrow,” you echo faintly, feeling off kilter and off balance as you watch him disappear into the distance.

Okay. So. You’ve told yourself on multiple occasions that, nowadays, what you feel for Hoseok is entirely platonic. He’s your best friend, and you love him, and it’s very easy to feel romantically inclined towards your friends sometimes because friendship involves love, and you should be friends with your romantic partners anyway, so there’s a lot of overlap. You may have lingering memories of your crush, yes, but you’re over it.

At least, you could have sworn you were. So why are you projecting onto Hoseok again all of a sudden? When he said he loved you, it wasn’t a romantic confession, despite what your instincts might be telling you. Your brain is screaming at you to look at it logically, and you’re trying your best to tell yourself that, that it Wasn’t Romantic and it was Just Hoseok Being Hoseok, the man who tells all his friends that he loves them on a regular basis, it wasn’t romantic.

“Morning, baby,” Hoseok says, smiling at you, before noticing both the coffees you’re holding. “Ooh, is one of those for me?”

“Hi.” Your voice is weirdly breathless. “Yeah, I got your favourite.”

Hoseok lights up and makes grabby hands at you, and you feel utterly helpless as you hand it over. You feel like Past-Y/n, a previous version of yourself, the one that was still new to BigHit and used to get all in a muddle when Hoseok so much as looked at you. You feel like you’re rediscovering your crush all over again, like some sort of giddy schoolgirl, and you kind of want to slap yourself- but then Hoseok takes a sip of his coffee and makes a little noise of pleasure and all that self-hatred turns to static, replaced with nothing but affection for the man holding the door open for you.

You manage to keep it together pretty well, for the most part, you think. It’s not until you leave your computer to speak to Hoseok about something that you nearly lose it. He sees you coming and smiles widely, instinctively wheeling away his desk and patting his lap in invitation. Your brain goes blank as you panic and you abruptly swerve and act like you were walking over to Jungkook the whole time, missing the way Hoseok’s face drops with disappointment.

You’ve been lurking to one side of Jungkook’s desk for a few minutes before the man acknowledges you, looking away from the video he’s apparently editing to raise an eyebrow at you.

“Are you lost? Hobi-hyung is over there.” Jungkook starts to point but then you grab his hand before anyone notices, pushing it back down against his desk.

“I know where Hobi is,” you say through gritted teeth. Jungkook blinks at you as you continue to trap his hand against his desk, tightening your grip when his fingers twitch. “I am having a small crisis and I would appreciate it if you let me pretend to have a conversation with you about work.”

Jungkook looks baffled but doesn’t argue, clearly a little scared of how tightly you’re grasping his fingers. “Um, okay,” he says, slowly. “Do you need to hold my hand at the same time?”

You look down at where your hands are still connected before you release him. He flexes his fingers with a wince. “Wow, you’re a lot stronger than you look.” He sounds impressed. “Have you been working out?”

“I bench press the weight of my stupidity daily,” you sigh. Jungkook lets your words pass without comment, putting his free hand back onto his mouse and resuming his work. You squint at his screen, intrigued. “What are you working on?”

You end up perching on Jungkook’s desk as he talks you through his most recent project, and how he and Tae have almost finished putting together the cat shelter video- you coo at all the footage of the different cats, small kittens to mangy strays, scruffy and cute. You’re too busy laughing at the unflattering shots they have of Yoongi while he’d been sleeping before they’d written across his face and you don’t notice how Hoseok keeps looking over with a mix of confusion and almost hurt flashing across his features.

He doesn't show any of this when you meet him later, though. You’ve recomposed yourself by the time lunch rolls around and you manage to return Hoseok’s casserole dish without fumbling. Despite your inner turmoil last night you’d still made time to pack lunch for the two of you, using the cute lunchboxes that Hoseok’s family had given you last Christmas- he lights up when he sees the dosirak you’ve packed, fluffy rice and other side dishes, all of his favourites.

“You are a blessing,” he says, and you smile as he eagerly dives in. You tackle your own food more slowly, having to approach the kimbap carefully because of how you’d been overzealous with the filling. “Ooh, can I have some of that?”

“Sure,” you say, gesturing at the bite sized slices in the tub in front of you. Instead of taking one of those, however, Hoseok leans forward for the piece of kimbap you’ve already grabbed. You’re frozen in place as you feel his lips around your fingers, teeth lightly grazing your skin as you instinctively surrender the food to his mouth, a light swipe of his tongue over your fingertips to catch the light sheen of sesame oil there, soft and wet against your touch.

Hoseok leans back and chews like nothing is out of the ordinary- and to be fair, you’ve fed finger foods to him before, it’s not out of the ordinary, but right now you feel like you’re on the verge of a meltdown. Your brain keeps replaying the past few seconds, the softness of his lips around your fingers, the wet of his tongue against them, the way his eyelashes had fanned out against his cheek as he’d glanced down at the food in your hand. You are Very Much Not Okay.

Hoseok is still happily chewing his kimbap, swallowing it down and taking a sip of water before he seems to notice that you’ve gone eerily silent. “Y/n?” He blinks at you. “Are you okay?”

“Uh, yeah,” you say. “Um. I just remembered that I. Have a thing? I have to? Go do? You can eat the rest, seeyoulaterBYE.”

You can’t let this crush rear its head like this again and make your friendship awkward. The two of you have shared the same bed more times than you can count, for God’s sake, and you’ve even discussed rooming together- the rent in LA isn’t exactly cheap, and if you pooled your resources you could get a pretty nice place- and that had all been okay! That hadn’t made you feel strange at all! But Hoseok eats food from your hand like he has a thousand times and you’re spiralling out of control like this? Why is this happening now?

Ugh. Ughughughugh. Stupid.

Namjoon finds you hidden away in the Unsolved studio later, where you’ve absconded with your tablet to try your best to get some work done with your limited resources, hidden away from everyone; it’s weird being in here when you’re not filming, without Hoseok in the seat next to you, so you’re not really doing a great job. (You’ve spent more time blankly watching Queer Eye on Netflix than you have being productive.)

“Hey, Y/n.” Namjoon’s gentle voice is like a balm to your soul. Hoseok might be your best friend now, but Namjoon was your friend first and the two of you are still close, both in and out of work. He’d made you feel comfortable and welcome when you’d first joined the team and continues to support all your projects. He’s a really great friend and colleague and an even better person.

You smile at him as he shuts the door. You can tell he’s trying to do it quietly but ends up accidentally slamming it loudly, and you stifle a laugh as you notice the guilt that appears on his face.

“Joonie! Come on in.” You beckon at the seat next to you, scooting away a little so he plenty of room to sit. “Everything alright?”

“Yeah, I’m fine, I just wanted to talk to you about some editing stuff but Hobi said you’d disappeared somewhere for a, um, ‘thing’.” Namjoon doesn’t comment on the fact that you still clearly have Queer Eye open on your tablet, Jonathan’s face a blur on the screen from where you’ve paused it during a transitional shot. Instead he sits carefully down next to you and leans back in the chair, adjusting his glasses; he looks particularly cozy today, with his glasses and jumper and cardigan. He pulls off the Hot Academic look really well. “Any particular reason why you’ve squirreled yourself away here?”

You muffle a sigh, looking down at the notebook you have next to your tablet; what little handwriting is on the page is especially messy and disjointed, reflecting your distracted mind. Namjoon has a naturally reassuring presence anyway but his outfit today seems to accentuate that even further, like you could bury your head into the fuzziness of his jumper and find inner peace.

“Oh, okay, I suppose this is happening,” he says.

Yep, the jumper is just as soft as you’d thought, and it smells nice and soft too. Namjoon doesn’t seem bothered that you’ve smooshed your face into his shoulder and instead he angles himself so you’re both more comfortable, and he starts to pat your back soothingly. It’s nice, of course, but you can’t help but compare his touch to Hoseok’s- Namjoon is more methodical and measured, like he’s thinking about each motion, while Hoseok just seems smoother and more natural because he’s always touching you, second nature by now.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

“Ughughughughguhguh,” you say articulately into the weave of Namjoon’s clothing. He chuckles warmly.

“Long day?”

Good old Namjoon. A gentle question, open ended, offering you the opportunity to deflect, or tell him the truth. You turn your head to avoid getting jumper lint in your mouth, but stay leaned against him.

“Kind of,” you say. “It’s just…” You struggle to put it into words, but Namjoon just waits patiently while he continues to pat your back. “It’s Hobi?”

Namjoon’s hand goes still, though you’re not sure if it’s because of your words themselves or the tone of them, the way you pitched it up at the end like a question, like you weren’t too sure yourself. “Did he do something?”

“No! No. Yes? No,” you settle on. “No, no he didn’t. It’s not him, it’s me,” you say. “Ugh.”

You end up pulling away from Namjoon to scrub tiredly at your face, not noticing his expression, which he quickly reschools when you look back at him. “We were just doing our usual thing, you know,” you say, and Namjoon nods as he listens, even though your description is incredibly vague and could mean any number of things. “But then he said he loved me and like- we’re best friends, we say we love each other a lot, it’s not unusual or anything, but… I guess it got to me this time? Like it felt like something more than just friendship? He didn’t mean it like that, of course, but I guess it’s hard to, uh, shake that feeling now that it’s gotten into my head.”

“Does it make you uncomfortable?” Although Namjoon seems a little perplexed he’s still clearly concerned, and your eyes widen.

“What? No, no, it’s fine! I don’t mind it. It’s more that-” You pause. You’ve never actually voiced your less-than-platonic feelings for Hoseok out loud, though you’re certain it must have been obvious to start with- even though no one had ever mentioned it or teased you about it, so maybe they hadn't noticed.

Either way, it sort of feels like once you put the words out into the world then the truth will linger and be unavoidable in a way that you’ve been desperately avoiding so far. But it’s just you, and Namjoon, and you would trust Namjoon with your life, even if you wouldn’t trust him to hold anything fragile or delicate. “It’s not the idea of Hoseok loving me like that that makes me uncomfortable. I just don’t want things to be weird?” Namjoon continues to look levelly at you, waiting patiently for you to get to the point, and you take in a deep breath. “IhaveacrushonHobi,” you rush out. “And I don’t want to ruin the friendship by reading into things too much because I’m being overly hopeful or something.”

Namjoon pauses. He looks thoughtful as he fixes his gaze on you through his glasses. “Y/n.” He sounds solemn, like he’s discussing something of deep importance, like your tiny breakdown over your best friend requires the same level of gravity as the rapid disappearance of bees, or climate change- like it’s something world changing and heavy and important. He’s not doing what you’ve done over the years, as in, desperately tried to minimise your feelings just so you can stay sane. “You sound unhappy about it.”

“I am unhappy about it,” you say, unhappy. “Hobi is my best friend and I do love him a lot, and I’m happy being friends, and I reallyreallyreally don’t want to make things weird. I should be used to this by now, it’s not like what he and I do is anything I’m not used to.”

“Things change when romantic feelings develop,” Namjoon says, ever patient, and you let out a pained little groan.

“It’s not- these feelings aren’t new, Namjoon.” You sigh, and for the first time since you started this conversation, Namjoon looks surprised. Guess your crush on Hoseok hadn’t been obvious in the beginning, then. “I don’t know if I ever told you that I met Hoseok before I even got a job here, technically?”

You’d come out of your BigHit interview feeling unsure. Off balance. You hadn’t known if you’d come across as desperate and too eager to please, rather than a go-getter team player, but all you’d been able to think about was how getting a job at BigHit would mean that you could finally save up enough to move out of the awful shared room you were in with the mould in the corner that kept coming back no matter how many times you cleaned it. The interview had gone on longer than you thought and you barely had time to get to Starbucks before your shift started- if you got a job at BigHit you could finally quit that place- and you’d hurried to leave the building only to discover that it was raining.

“Oh,” you’d said.

You’d stood in the reception area, staring out of the glass windows at the torrential downpour outside; it had been sunny earlier that day, no indication that the heavens were going to open, and you hadn’t brought a coat or umbrella with you. Your one nice interview outfit was going to get drenched, and it was going to stay wet in your locker at Starbucks while you were working, and basically the entire month had been just terrible and after a potentially wasted interview you just kind of wanted to cry.

Before the tears could start to pool in your eyes, however, Hoseok had appeared. Not that you’d known him or his name at the time, of course, but he’d swept into the building like some burst of sunlight that had cut through the clouds despite the rain, shaking an umbrella off before laughing at Yoongi’s disgruntled face at the scattering water. You’d been stunned by the sudden flare of energy in the room and were still standing there when Hoseok’s eyes fell on you, on your stance, the way you were staring at the grey skies outside and the obvious lack of an umbrella in your hands.

And he’d just- he’d just walked up to you like you were friends, like he knew you, and he’d proffered the still damp umbrella, like it was nothing.

“It’s raining pretty heavily out there,” he’d said, and he’d been smiling, and you’d looked at him in shock, and he’d laughed. “You’ll need this.”

“I- what?”

“You clearly need this more than me,” Hoseok had said, bright smile fading into something a little more gentle, and you’d accepted the umbrella with unsteady hands, unable to say no to this sunshine of a man. “Feel free to give it back whenever.”

“I- I don’t work here,” you’d admitted, shamefaced. “I’m just here for an interview.”

“So you can give it back to me once you get the job.” Hoseok had said it like it was a done deal, like there weren’t other people vying for the position you’d applied for, people who were probably infinitely more qualified and better in interviews. “Okay?”

For the first time that month, you’d felt like someone believed in you- because you certainly didn’t believe in yourself. But Hoseok had been smiling at you, with his heart shaped mouth and his bright eyes, and you’d felt like a flower basking in his rays, turning towards him as your petals unfurled in his light, and you’d said- “Sure. Yes. I will.”

Here, now, in the present, you look down at your hands as you finish telling this story. “I just put the umbrella on his desk when he wasn’t around, after I got the job,” you tell Namjoon. “I didn’t talk to Hobi for ages because I didn’t- I didn’t have the strength to look him in the face without, you know. Without making it obvious that I had a raging schoolgirl crush on him. And he never said anything about it- I don't think he even remembered me at all, he'd just given some person his umbrella because they needed it, you know? And then we became friends and my crush died down and everything was okay, but- I guess the crush never really went away after all. Ugh,” you say. “This sucks, Joon. It sucks.”

The way Namjoon looks at you is compassionate and soft. “I know,” he says. “It’s understandable that you’re worried about this, because your friendship with Hoseok is important to you. But I don’t think you have anything to be concerned about, really.”

“You’re just saying that,” you mumble, and Namjoon chuckles.

“No, I’m not,” he says, gently. “I think you need to be more confident in what you and Hoseok have. Even if you admitted your feelings and he didn’t feel the same, you know he loves you too much to throw your friendship away, and it’s strong enough that it can survive whatever’s thrown at it. But, if you’ll forgive me for speaking out of turn, I would wager you’re not the only one with romantic feelings, Y/n.”

“You’re very sweet, Joonie, but I really don’t think that’s the case.” You let out a little self-pitying sigh. “Hobi’s just so lovely to everyone, it probably seems like that because we’re best friends.”

One of Namjoon’s eyebrows rises. “Is that what you really think?”

“Yes,” you say, a little miserable, looking down as you pick at a loose thread in one of your sleeves. “People mistake us as a couple a lot because we’re so close, you know? But Hoseok doesn’t see me like that.”

“Mm.” Namjoon makes a little noise of understanding, giving you a considering look as you continue to unravel your sleeve. “I see.”

He eventually coaxes you out of the studio, and when he discovers that you never finished your lunch he brings you to the café around the corner that all the BigHit employees love; you pick up an iced coffee for Hoseok, just the way he likes it. You feel better after talking to Namjoon and by the time you leave the café you feel pretty much back to normal. Mostly relaxed. You don’t feel weird when Hoseok lights up when he sees you, because he always does, because you’re his best friend, and this is normal. You can be normal.

“Again? It was my turn to get you coffee,” Hoseok says with a pout and you laugh.

“Don’t worry about it.” When you hand Hoseok his drink and your fingers brush, it’s okay. It’s okay. Your friendship with Hoseok is more important than your other feelings for him, and you’ll just focus on that. You’re not sure that’s what Namjoon was trying to communicate to you, with all his listening and gentle words, but you can bottle up these emotions and keep them on lockdown until the weird feeling passes. It’ll work. You’ll be fine.

A few hours later, you realise that you’re not fine.

“Joonie!” You pounce on Namjoon when you find him alone in the break room, filling a glass at the tap. He jumps and sends water sloshing over his hands when he drops his cup, though it fortunately doesn’t break when it clatters into the sink. “Oh, sorry, I didn’t mean to surprise you.”

“I’m not going to point out that you snuck up on me from behind without making any noise, but, that’s okay,” Namjoon says, ever tolerant. He very carefully puts the glass upright in the middle of the sink before he turns around. “What’s up?”

“I, um, am maybe panicking a little bit,” you admit in a hushed voice, even though there’s no one else in the tiny kitchen with you. “So you know Unsolved has a bigger budget now that we’re more popular? And I’ve been pushing for us to go abroad somewhere on said bigger budget? And they said we could schedule some episodes for Britain because basically every other building in Britain is haunted?”

“Yes, I am aware,” Namjoon says. “I did help you to draft the emails that you sent management.”

“You did, and I’m still eternally grateful,” you say, truthfully. “But I’ve been so caught up in the 70th episode retrospective and my much more recent, uh, Hoseok related stuff, that I totally forgot how soon it was coming up and we fly to London next week?”

Namjoon blinks at you. “You have plenty of time to pack before next week, why are you panicking?”

You muffle a scream into your hands while Namjoon looks on with concern.

“It’s not packing I’m worried about, Joon,” you say once you’ve pulled your face out of your palms. “It’s just that when we’re abroad I’m not going to be able to get away from Hoseok and I’m worried that I’m going to erupt like a volcano and spew all my emotions over him and then I’m going to have to change my name and drop off the grid forever when he inevitably rejects me, and I was always terrible at camping. I could never get the fire to light.”

Namjoon, for all that his patience seems endless and eternal, gives you a look that borders on weary. Like he’s the father to a child who keeps eating glue even after being told that there’s no nutritional value in it and they should be using it for macaroni art anyway, and also why are they eating the glue when it’d make more sense to eat the pasta that’s right there, even if it’s uncooked?

“First of all, you can be off the grid and still have access to ways of heating that don’t require fire,” he says. “And second of all, why are you panicking so much about London?”

“Because Hobi always gets super clingy when we fly anywhere.” You shuffle from foot to foot, feeling awkward. “And that’s when we’re still in the US. I feel like if we’re in a different country it’ll be compounded? Even if I don’t say anything out loud, I feel like my feelings will be obvious just in the way I act?”

Namjoon pauses before he grips your shoulders. His palms feel so big and warm, a steadying presence. “Would that be so terrible? Think about it, Y/n. If that was the case, then it gives Hobi the opportunity to speak out if he notices. If your friendship is entirely platonic to him, then he won’t notice, right? You’ll be okay.”

You open your mouth to take in a breath and respond, but before you can say anything Seokjin comes sauntering into the cramped break area, entirely indifferent to the weird atmosphere he’s walked into. His eyebrows raise as he spots how you and Namjoon are standing. “Ooh, are we gossiping? Is there tea to be spilled? You both look very serious, let me in on it.”

“I was just asking Namjoon if there was any advice he could give me about travelling to Britain,” you lie.

“She didn’t realise that over there lemonade is like soda.” Namjoon lets his hands drop from your shoulders as he plays along with ruse, and your face twists up in confusion.

“It’s what?” You look at him for a second before realising that Jin is staring at you, and you pretend to laugh. “Ohh, yeah, haha! Yeah, that’s crazy, haha. Um, I should get back to my desk for my notebook, I should write this down before I forget,” you say, before scuttling out of the break room.

Once you’ve disappeared, Seokjin gives Namjoon a long look. “I can’t believe you haven’t broken yet,” he says. “I still personally think we should just lock them both in a room together until one of them confesses, but apparently that’s ‘inappropriate workplace behaviour’.” The air quotes he makes are exaggerated and theatrical, as if the entire thing is a farce.

“It is and I’m not going to take that statement back,” Namjoon responds. Seokjin rolls his eyes dramatically but Namjoon ignores him. “It’s better if they come around to it by themselves. I believe in them. Besides, weren’t you the one who intervened when it looked like Hoseok was going to kiss her? I had to edit that footage, I saw how you pushed all those decorations off the table.”

Jin raises his eyebrows. “Can you imagine the chaos if he’d done that without either of them confessing properly first? They’d both pretend like it never happened. I was doing them a favour.” He casts a sideways look at Namjoon, who nods in reluctant agreement. “You know the rest of the office has a pool on how soon one of those idiots actually confesses? Do you want in on it? If either one of us gets it, we can split it 50/50.”

“That’s also grossly inappropriate,” Namjoon says, before he pauses. “Hm. How much is in the pool?”

Turns out you didn’t need to worry so much.

“Oh my God, look at that!” Hoseok has his face pressed up against the glass of the pod, the London Eye giving you the opportunity to look down at the metropolis of the city sprawling out below you; Hoseok’s pointing at a weirdly shaped skyscraper, panels of glass refracting off alternate shades of blue. “That’s so cool!”

“I think it’s called The Gherkin,” you say and he makes a noise of delight. Beside you, Jimin and Taehyung take a selfie with the panorama of London behind them, and you smile.

It’s true that Hoseok has been clingier than usual. The thing is, though, you’ve been clingier too; you’ve had time between filming to do some sightseeing, and neither of you have been to London before, so everything is exciting and fun and new, and you’ve been holding onto each other throughout the journey, familiarity in an unfamiliar place. You’re too busy taking in the sights and travelling from place to place, you and Hoseok and Jimin and Taehyung cramming close together each time you take the Tube somewhere, or asking people to take photos of you, and you’re having too much fun to worry about anything else.

You even get recognised a few times, which is exciting. You know Unsolved is popular but there’s something gratifying about people an ocean away knowing who you are and enjoying your work- you look on fondly as Hoseok makes your fans laugh, putting the nervous ones at ease, before shuffling together so they can take photos with you. It’s lovely, really, and you’re so glad that you and Hoseok get to experience this together. There’s no one else you’d rather be with.

You’d had a brief moment of panic after filming the first episode, Hoseok sliding into your bed as per usual, but you’d both been so tired and jetlagged that you’d basically fallen asleep the second he’d finished wrapping his arms around you, so it had been okay. You weren’t as jetlagged for the second episode, of course, but there was something soothing about having Hoseok curled around you as he slept; despite how your heart probably should have been racing, it had just gone quiet instead, slipping into a gentle beating rhythm as you’d drifted into sleep.

So on the whole it’s been all been going a lot better than you’d thought. It feels natural to let your head fall onto Hoseok’s shoulder as you both stare out of the train window, watching the fields and villages slip by as you race out of London to your final filming location, only a few days away from jetting home again.

“We should come back,” Hoseok says suddenly, his voice low enough that Jimin and Taehyung aren’t distracted from the card game they’re playing together across the aisle from you.

“For more episodes? We’ll probably have to wait till the next quarter so there’s money in the budget.” You turn away from the view outside to look up at him, chin resting on his shoulder. “We can start looking up other haunted locations when we get home, if you want.”

Hoseok smiles. “I meant we should come back just for a regular holiday,” he says. “So we don’t have to worry about rushing from place to place. I know you’re disappointed we didn’t have time to see the Royal Botanic Gardens. I know how much you love flowers.”

Oh. You keep looking up at Hoseok, the way you have such a perfect view of the round apples of his cheeks, the swoop of his nose, the sharp cut of his jaw- you think about walking hand in hand with him past bursting blooms, through delicate arching greenhouses, surrounded by colour and beauty, and you know you’d still think he was the most beautiful flower there.

“I’d like that,” you say quietly. You’re almost drowned out by how loudly Taehyung yells snap! and the subsequent groan Jimin lets out, but you know Hoseok hears you by the way his mouth lifts into a smile. “Is there anything you wanted to see next time?”

Hoseok shrugs, but only with one shoulder, doing a little jiggle with the one you’re not resting your chin on, which makes you smile. “Nothing specific,” he says. “I’m happy as long as I get to see it with you.”

Your eyes flutter shut as he says this, words settling deep in your chest, and you turn your head so that your cheek is resting on his shoulder again, shirt soft against your skin. “Love you, Hobi.”

Hoseok doesn’t respond straight away, but then he turns his head and kisses the crown of your head lightly. “Love you too.”

You arrive in Colchester in the late afternoon, and you don’t film until tomorrow, so after you’ve finished unpacking your stuff at your apparently haunted bed and breakfast, you make the group decision to just chill out for the evening and grab a couple of drinks. There’s a pub near your B&B so you and the boys pile into it, claiming a table in the corner so that you’re not in the way of the regulars, although every so often one of you has to venture up to the bar to order your drinks, trying to follow whatever sort of queuing system seems to be going on. (After the lemonade thing you had actually ended up actually asking Namjoon about Britain and the etiquette over here, and he was very insistent on following queues.)

By the time it’s your turn to grab the drinks it seems like it’s starting to get busy, so it’s taking some time for the bartender to get to you, but that’s okay- you lean against the bar and scroll through your phone, taking the opportunity to double check your schedule for tomorrow, when you feel someone tap your arm and you glance up.

“Hi,” the man says. He’s been waiting nearby, lounging against the bar, similar to you. “Are you waiting for a drink? You can go first, if you’d like.”

“Oh, no, no!” You shake your head and laugh a little. “You were here before me, that’s okay.”

When he hears your accent his eyes light up. “Oh, are you a tourist? I thought I hadn’t seen you around, because I definitely would have remembered you. How long are you over here for?”

“Uh, just a couple of nights.” You smile at him. “I’m guessing you’re a local?”

“Yeah.” He smiles back at you. “I could show you around, if you’d like.”

You startle at the sudden sensation of hands sliding around your waist, but it only takes you a second to recognise the touch and you relax against Hoseok, your back pressed against his chest as you turn away from the man to glance up at your friend. “Hi, baby,” he says. “Did you make a friend?”

“We’ve only just started talking, actually,” you say, turning back to the guy you have yet to introduce yourself properly to. “Sorry, I never caught your name?”

“That’s okay. I think my friends are calling me,” he says, and he pushes himself off the bar before brushing himself down and then walking away, giving both of you a polite little nod as he passes.

“He never even ordered his drinks.” You blink with confusion and then shrug. “Oh well, means we’ll get ours sooner. You can go sit back down, Hobi, I’ll be back soon.”

“I’m already here, I may as well stay with you,” he says, tightening his grip around your waist, and you don’t argue. He keeps hold of you as you wait and then helps you carry your drinks to the table before he pulls you onto his lap, keeping you in place with one hand splayed over your stomach while he uses the other to lift his glass to his mouth.

“Fuck chairs, right?” Jimin says. Taehyung elbows him.

“Don’t be jealous because I have the best seat in the house,” you say, before sticking your tongue out at Jimin.

He gives you a mock affronted gasp and clutches his chest and you laugh before settling back against Hoseok, comfortable on your familiar perch atop his thighs. Hoseok might be the world’s biggest lightweight and easily gets tipsy over a single sip of alcohol- but despite this, his hold on you is firm and steady, even when he’s laughing over your shoulder, keeping you safe in his lap. He keeps stealing sips of your drink, dipping his head forwards to capture your straw whenever you’re not paying attention, but you don’t mind. What’s yours is Hoseok’s. (You’ve been taking sips of his beer, too, even if you make a face at the bitterness each time.)

By the time you shuffle back to your B&B, you’re all pleasantly drunk and keep giggling at each other about dumb and inconsequential things, although you’re careful to keep your voices down so that you don’t disturb anyone, trying to keep your footsteps light as you walk up the stairs. Jimin and Taehyung’s room is a little further up the corridor than yours and you clap your hand over your mouth to stifle your laughter when you see Taehyung trying to open the wrong door before Jimin redirects him.

You might not be too much better, but at least you remember which room is yours- you unlock the door on your first try, although it’s a little hard to step inside with how Hoseok is wrapped around your back, trying to time his steps with yours but failing a little with how tipsy he is. You keep laughing whenever he moves his feet forwards at the wrong time, a messy tangle of limbs that keep bumping together as you kick your shoes off, and you end up collapsing onto one of the beds with Hoseok still clinging onto you. He tips over backwards while your back is still pressed to his chest and you let out a little squeal at the sudden falling sensation, but he cushions your fall without complaint and still doesn’t let go, even when you accidentally elbow him in the sternum.

“We should wash up and get in our pyjamas,” you say, but you’re already wriggling into a more comfortable position, turning over so you can look at his face instead of staring up at the ceiling. Hoseok’s head has sunken into one of the fluffy hotel-style pillows, his hair a messy halo around his head, face flushed red from the alcohol. You smile down at him. “Hi.”

“Hi,” he says. “I don’t want to move right now.”

“You’re so drunk,” you giggle, but you rest your head on his chest and let your body relax, muscles unwinding as you let out a long, happy sigh. “We can move later, then.”

Even though you’d genuinely meant to get up and do your nightly ritual, you’re so comfortable snuggled with Hoseok in the soft bed that you drift off. For once, you fall asleep before him, eyes fluttering shut as your breaths deepen with sleep; Hoseok keeps stroking a hand down your back, brushing tenderly down the line of your spine with his long fingers in a way he’s done a thousand times. He’s still grateful for the opportunity every time, though- that he gets to see you like this, that he can touch you like this, that you’ve allowed him so deeply into your life and made a home in his, too.

“Goodnight, baby,” Hoseok says, voice barely audible in the quiet of the room. You’re so deeply asleep that you don’t stir, but he’s still careful and gentle when he touches his lips to your forehead with the lightest of pressures, tender. “Sleep well.”

When you wake up the next morning, it takes you a long time to come fully to your senses. You feel warm and heavy, surrounded by the smell of fresh sheets and Hoseok, and you don’t want to wake up just yet; you’re in that soft place between waking and sleeping, drifting in wakeful limbo as you slowly start to regain a sense of who you are and where you are.

Your brain flickers on, starting to pull itself together as the sensation of being a singular warm mass starts to dissolve, drawing up a mental map of how your body is slotted against Hoseok’s, where your limbs start and his end. That’s your head against his chest, listening to the steady beat of his heart. That’s his arm around your shoulder, keeping you close even in your sleep. That’s your hand, resting on his hip, fingers hooked in his belt. Those are your legs, tangled around his, your toes pressed to his calf, and that’s-

Your eyes fly open. You’re still wearing your clothes from the night before, thicker denim of your jeans rather than the flimsy cotton of your pyjamas, but you know exactly what’s pressed against your hip bone. You’ve slept in the same bed with Hoseok enough times that this wouldn’t be the first time you’ve woken to his morning wood, but you’ve never been this tangled up before; you normally slide out of bed and pretend you haven’t noticed anything, and by the time Hoseok wakes up it’s normally gone, or he subtly shuffles off to the bathroom to deal with it, thinking that you’re none the wiser.

It’s natural, it’s normal, it’s nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about, but right now all you can think of is the hand you have near his hip, how close it is to his arousal, how easy it would be to slip your hand past his belt and jeans and boxers to grasp that hard, heavy heat-

You stiffen. You would never, ever do that, not ever, never take advantage of Hoseok while he was sleeping, and you know it was just a flickering thought in your still sleepy brain, probably still a little drunk, too- but you feel sick. You can’t believe you would even hypothetically consider taking advantage of him like that. If you were more than friends, then, sure, you’d wake Hoseok up with a pleasuring touch- but you’re not. You’re not.

It takes a real feat of slow, drawn out acrobatics, but you manage to extricate yourself from Hoseok’s grasp without waking him. He only wakes up to the sound of the shower rumbling through the wall, blinking as he realises that his arms are empty, even though he should be used to this by now. By the time you walk out of the ensuite, towelling off your hair, Hoseok’s got a cup of tea waiting for you by the kettle, a few scattered milk droplets nearby from the tiny, complimentary pots.

“Morning, baby.” He’s still sleepy and there’s a crease on his cheek from where he’d turned his head into the pillow, hair ruffled, shirt wrinkled after a night of sleeping in it. “Tea?”

You feel a little better after your hot shower, scrubbing all the dirty thoughts off your skin, but when Hoseok looks so soft and homely like this it’s hard not to want to just eat him whole.

“Ooh, how British,” you say, trying to laugh- Hoseok still seems too heavy-eyed to notice how you’re a little bit off right now, thankfully. “Yes, please.”

Unfortunately, you can’t shake your lingering weirdness and feelings of guilt, and when Hoseok wakes fully, he notices. You’re not due to film at Colchester Castle until it’s night time, shooting the episode when it’s going to be dark, so you’ve organised a day trip to the town’s zoo- Colchester Zoo is huge, full of all sorts of animals and exhibits, and Hoseok’s been excited to visit it from the moment he found out about it.

You’d even looked up the map online so that you could plan out the optimum route and ensure you didn’t miss anything, the two of you crowding around your phone screen and pointing excitedly at the names of the different exhibits, ready and raring to go.

So Hoseok is understandably a little stunned when you apparently seem to want to drag your feet and stay with Jimin and Taehyung instead. Both the boys want to just wander around the zoo willy-nilly, separating off from you and taking it slow- but after a brief, silent discussion between the two of them, eyes flicking at each other and then back to you, they agree to come with you on your planned route.

You send up a silent prayer of thanks to anyone who’s listening. You can use the chaotic duo as cushioning and put them between you and Hoseok if you need to.

You know you’re not being especially subtle right now, but every time Hoseok moves closer to you all you can think about is how his choice of outfit today is fraying your already delicate nerves, the loose fabric of his fashionable sweatpants doing nothing to protect the outline of his dick from your wandering gaze. You don’t mean to look, but you can’t help it, even if you’re fairly certain that half the time it’s just a crease in the fabric from how he’s standing and not actually his dick, but-

“I thought it’d be harder than that,” Taehyung says. “It’s so much hairier than I thought it would be.”

You freeze, eyes shooting away from Hoseok’s crotch. Luckily no one seems to be paying you any attention and instead the boys are peering into the armadillo exhibit, watching as the animal snuffles around the ground.

“They don’t call it a large hairy armadillo for nothing,” Jimin giggles. “And it’s still a baby, the armour hasn’t grown in properly yet. It’ll look harder once it’s grown up a bit.”

All the tension rushes out of your body at once. Jesus Christ.

Hoseok notices you slumping a little, glancing up from the map when he hears the sigh of air escape your body. “Are you okay?” He seems concerned.

“Never better,” you lie unconvincingly, giving him a weak smile. “What’s next on the list?”

Hoseok seems concerned about you for the whole day, and even a little hurt when you keep slipping out of his grasp, but the truth is that you need to put some distance between the two of you right now, for the sake of your own heart and sanity. Being desperately head over heels for Hoseok is one thing and you’d just started becoming okay with that again, but this sudden wave of physical yearning (you’re too embarrassed to think of it as horniness) is out of the left field and it’s a lot harder to cover up. You hate seeing sadness on Hoseok’s face, and normally you’d be cooing over him and asking him to tell you what’s wrong- but you know what’s wrong. It’s you.

“Do you think something happened?” Taehyung whispers quietly to Jimin, the two of them watching as you act like you’ve been distracted by the Koi fish and walk away from Hoseok as he’s just about to reach for your hand.

“I think we’re reaching critical mass.” Jimin pretends to read from the zoo map. “We’ve nearly hit the nuclear reaction and one of them is finally going to blow. It might get messy.”

“I hope not,” Taehyung says, watching the way Hoseok stares at the back of your head as you peer into the tank of glittering fish. “I’ve never been good at cleaning up.”

It’s a little easier once the evening finally rolls around and Hoseok replaces those delicious sweatpants with marginally more professional jeans, as ripped as they are. It’s also easier to slip into the natural rhythm and rapport you have when you’re being filmed- it’s not that you’re ever any faker on camera, but it’s just an unthinking response to the sight of them, your body switching from Normal mode to Work mode. Taehyung readjusts the camera rig you have looped around your body while Jimin sorts out Hoseok, night vision lens pointed towards your faces, before letting you go.

“Ready?” You ask, glancing at your co-host. Hoseok seems less enthusiastic than usual, and you internally cringe, contrition shooting through you at how you’ve managed to dampen his mood because you’ve spent the whole day being distant.

“Ready,” Hoseok says, subdued. Your face crumples and you reach out for his hand, squeezing his fingers, trying to communicate a silent apology for something he isn’t even aware of.

“I won’t abandon you, okay?” You keep your fingers tangled with his as you speak and grip them hard. “There’s a lot of scary stuff in this castle and I promise I won’t leave your side.”

Hoseok pauses but then squeezes your hand back, and he seems to brighten, even though he’s still a little dimmed. “I know,” he says. “I know you won’t.”

Even though he says that, he spends less time clinging onto you than normal. It’s probably not noticeable to the average onlooker, and with how most of the footage is going to be cut later, you’re certain your audience won’t notice either- but while Hoseok still screams and jumps at things, he seems to separate from you as soon as the fear has passed. He doesn’t linger or keep hold of you, even when he seems visibly shaken, eyes wide as you ascend the stairs and hear what sounds like singing even though there’s no one else here- it’s probably just wind whistling through the ancient corridors and walls of the castle, but you know that Hoseok is terrified.

“Do you want to hold my hand?” You look over your shoulder and proffer your hand but Hoseok just shakes his head.

“I’m fine.” He’s clinging onto the banister, both hands white knuckled around the metal railing. “I’m fine.”

Even though you’ve been the one who’s been avoiding touching him all day, it hurts when he says that, as hypocritical as you know you’re being. You draw your hand back to your side and don’t offer again after that, although you still pat him soothingly when he instinctively grabs you later, jumping at a clattering noise in the distance. You’re not easily spooked, but Colchester Castle definitely has some weird vibes, so if you’re feeling like this, Hoseok must feel even more scared than normal.

At one point you walk through a spider web and flinch in surprise when you feel it on your face, jumping backwards and swiping at your face. Hoseok is immediately there, eyes wide as he stares at you, immediately protective despite his fear. “Are you okay? What happened?”

“Uh, it was just a spider web,” you admit, chagrined. “I overreacted, sorry.”

Hoseok nods and immediately backs off, giving you room as he turns around. You can’t help the hurt that flashes across your face as soon as he looks away.

“Critical mass,” Jimin mutters to Taehyung, who nods sagely.

The worst and weirdest moment of the night actually happens once the episode is over. Hoseok is oddly quiet as you both get ready for bed, not talking to you through the open bathroom door as he meticulously massages cream into his face like he normally does- and once he flicks the light off, plunging the room into blue tinged darkness, you’re stunned as you watch his silhouette slide into his own bed instead of into yours.

He’s never slept in his own bed after a supernatural filming. Even after your first paranormal themed episode together, when you’d still been mostly strangers. He’d been bashful and hesitant despite how obviously scared he was, asking if he could sleep in your bed, and of course you’d said yes, wanting to do anything you could to soothe him and help him feel safe. So the fact he’s not sleeping in your bed now, it’s- it’s- it’s not right.

The only light in the room is from the tiny, faint red numbers of the digital clock, and you watch as time trickles slowly by- you stay awake for what feels like hours, laying on your side as you stare towards Hoseok’s bed. Your eyes adjust to the near darkness, room painted in low-contrast sfumato, and you can see how Hoseok is turned away from you; he’s unnaturally still and silent, and you know he hasn’t fallen asleep either, too scared and wound up to drift off.

Outside, a vehicle rumbles past, and you can see how Hoseok stiffens at the noise of the loose fan belt, a high squeal that’s admittedly startling after the silence of the night. The shine of the headlights through the drawn curtains is muted but still more than enough to throw the room into brief, sharp relief, the tension in Hoseok’s shoulders screaming out to you- you can’t stand it anymore and you slip out from under your blankets so that you can make your way across the dark room.

Hoseok turns when he hears you stumble over something on the floor- you think it’s a pair of socks- and makes a little noise of surprise when you throw back the corner of his duvet so you can slide in next to him.

“Y/n?” He sounds tired, but still fully awake- you were right, he’s been struggling to sleep.

“Hobi,” you say. “Why are you over here, all alone like this?”

You can barely make out the details of his features, as curved towards each other as you are; you can see the faint darkness where his hollows of his eyes are, his pretty mouth nothing more than an undefined line in the muted room.

“I- I didn’t want to disturb you.” His voice is a quiet, unhappy murmur, and you feel your heart break at the dejection in his tone.

“Oh, Hoseok.” You cup his face in your hands, running your thumbs back and forth over his cheeks; you can feel the tension in his face, how he must be frowning. You might not be able to see everything all too well, but you’re more than familiar enough with Hoseok’s face to know where the furrow between his brows is, and press a little kiss to it. “My Hobi,” you say, and start to litter kisses over his forehead, his cheeks, his eyelids, the tip of his nose. “My baby. My darling.”

You keep touching your lips to his skin, wanting his unhappiness and fear to fade away, whispering pet names between each kiss. You tilt your lips against his chin, and Hoseok makes a little noise before his hands come up to grasp your wrists, pulling them away from where they’re still cupping his jaw. You go still, eyes widening, even if he can’t see it. “Hoseok?”

“Did I- did I do something wrong?” He sounds unsure. “You were avoiding me all day- I thought you didn’t want- I thought you wanted me to leave you alone,” he says, and you can hear guilt in his voice. “I thought I’d scared you off somehow.”

You make a little, unhappy noise. “No, baby, no,” you say. You shake your head, faces still so close from your kisses that your noses brush, but you don’t pull away- you need him to know that it’s not his fault. “I’m sorry. It wasn’t that at all.”

“Then what was it?” His grip slips away from around your wrists to slide his fingers between yours instead, holding your hands. “Tell me.”

You go still. His tone is so imploring: he wants to know what’s wrong, so he can fix it, make it better. “Hoseok.” Your voice is quiet. “You’re my best friend, Hoseok.”

“And you’re mine,” he says, squeezing your hands. Your heart feels small and feeble in your chest, a weak little thing that swells up at Hoseok’s words, but immediately shrinks again in fear. “You can tell me anything.”

“You’re my best friend, Hoseok,” you repeat. Hoseok goes silent. “You’re my best friend, and I-” You take a deep breath, trying to fill your lungs, get some oxygen flowing through your terrified heart, taking bellows to a dying ember, trying to grow it into a flame. “Honestly, I’m just selfish, Hoseok,” you say. “I’m just- being your best friend is already everything to me- but I’m so selfish-”

“Y/n.” Hoseok’s voice is a hush.

“I’m in love with you, Hoseok.”

There. You said it.

You can feel how Hoseok stiffens, how his fingers go utterly still in yours as you continue to speak.

“I’m in love with you, and I was just so scared you’d realise how head over heels I’ve always been for you and you’d end our friendship because everything I feel is just so much, and I just needed space today, I needed space to try and get my head straight and not scare you away by making things weird, and I’m sorry I hurt you, I didn’t mean to, I never want to hurt you, Hoseok. I’m sorry. I love you. Please don’t hate me.”

You take in a deep shuddering breath once all the words have spilled out of you, so much air. It’s out in the world, now, and you can’t take it back.

As the seconds tick by, the initial heady rush of terror starts to fade and is instead replaced with resignation, unsurprised at how Hoseok is still frozen against you. He’s deathly silent. He’s probably mentally drafting the nicest way to gently let you down, always so kind and lovely, so wonderful, your Hoseok.

A twinge shoots through your heart as you mentally correct yourself- he’s not yours, and he doesn’t want to be. You should have just kept your mouth shut.

“I’m sorry,” you say again. Your voice is a miserable whisper. “You’re just so easy to love.”

You try to pull your hands out of his so you can slink back to your bed and wallow in your misery, but Hoseok just tightens his grip. You tug again, a little more insistent, and this time he lets go- but before you can roll out of his bed he’s grabbing your face, long, beautiful fingers splaying over your cheeks and jaw, locking you in place as he presses his forehead against yours.

“Y/n.” His voice is uncharacteristically serious, low. “I’m going to kiss you.”

Your eyes widen. “You’re-”

You’re cut off when Hoseok presses his mouth to yours. He’s kissed you before, on your forehead, your cheeks, the bare skin of your shoulder when you wear the sundress he likes so much- but you’ve never felt his heart shaped lips against yours, never felt them soft and warm as they catch your own, and it’s so much. He keeps drawing his mouth across yours, catching your lips between his own, tongue pressing out to swipe across them, and you shiver as the kiss slowly turns slick and wet, even as it stays so tender.

His hands wrap around your waist and he rolls over you, pinning you down with his weight as you keep kissing and kissing and kissing. Your hands are in his hair while his cup your face, holding you like you’re something delicate and precious, palms warm against your skin. You don’t separate to breathe, keeping your lips locked as the kisses turn open-mouthed, Hoseok’s tongue gliding against yours, the lingering taste of your shared toothpaste mingling with his saliva- you shiver underneath him when he nips at your lower lip before soothing it with his tongue, and you crane your head forward to press further into his mouth, kisses slow and deep, and by the time you finally separate, you feel dizzy and breathless.

“Hobi,” you breathe out. “Hobi, turn the light on, I want to see you.”

Hoseok leans over you to flick on the bedside lamp, illuminating you both with its bright light- you can see how kiss swollen his gorgeous mouth is, how the sheen of your saliva on his flushed lips glows gold from the lamplight, how his hair is a mess from how you’ve been running your hands through it. He looks like your best friend, and also nothing like that at all, something familiar and unfamiliar all at once. Hoseok, forever changed by the touch of your lips.

“My baby.” He’s smiling at you, all warmth and fondness, and you squirm underneath him, embarrassed by the weight of his affection for you. “Y/n. I love you too.”

You probably shouldn’t be surprised, considering how Hoseok has just kissed you breathless, but you still feel your heart stutter in your chest. You’re staring up at him with your wide eyes as he bends forward again- he mimics what you did earlier, trailing kisses over your forehead and cheekbones and nose before he kisses one corner of your mouth, then the other, then your cupid’s bow, then just under the swell of your bottom lip. “I love you, love you, love you,” he says, punctuating each kiss with the repeated confession, as if each time he says it it’s not punching the air out of your lungs.

“Hoseok?”

“Yes?” He’s still smiling, those warm little creases under his eyes as he looks at you, every inch of him just screaming out happiness. You did that. He’s happy because of you.

“Do you- do you remember when we first met? Years ago?” You don’t want to break the moment, but he’s never mentioned the umbrella thing and you’ve never asked before and you have a burning desire to know if he can recall-

“Do you mean the first time we actually met, or the first time you officially introduced yourself to me? I remember both,” Hoseok says. “I always knew you’d get the job. Besides, if you hadn’t, you would have had to keep the umbrella,” he adds, smile edging into something a little cheeky. “And then there would have been a pretty girl out there thinking about me every time it rained.”

Your eyes widen before you hide your face in your hands, overwhelmed at the idea that Hoseok had thought that you were pretty before he’d even known you; he coos at you and pulls your hands away to reveal your flustered expression, trapping them against the pillow so you can't hide your face again. Hoseok’s smile has faded into something a little more serious, but no less loving, and although you feel open and naked and vulnerable right now, it’s not because you think he’s judging you.

“You never said anything, so I thought you’d forgotten,” you admit. “But from the second you smiled at me as you handed me that umbrella, I knew I was a goner. I’ve been in love with you for a long time, Hoseok.”

It’s not often that you see Hoseok look like this, his eyes so serious and deep, but his entire face is still so soft, smiling. “Me, too,” he confesses. “Me too. I didn’t say anything because I didn’t want to risk our friendship and I love you too much to want to give that up.”

The smile that splits your face is so wide it almost hurts. “I love you,” you say again, for the sheer novelty of hearing it out loud, seeing how Hoseok lights up- the fact you can say it without fear of his reaction, because he loves you, too. He loves you. He’s in love with you. “I love you, Hoseok, I-”

He cuts you off with a kiss, swallowing your words of love into his curved mouth, the two of you smiling and laughing as your lips come together again and again- but when he presses his tongue to your lower lip and you part them, he licks into your mouth in a way that’s almost lewd, warm and wet, and you shiver as you think about exactly how long that tongue is.

Hoseok still has his hands around your wrists from before, and you feel how his grip tightens imperceptibly when he feels you tremble underneath him. Your cheeks feel warm when he pulls back and you wonder if your blush is visible, but Hoseok seems intent on other things, dipping his head forward to catch your earlobe between his teeth for a sharp moment, nipping it before licking it with his hot, wet tongue. Your entire body shudders as he starts to kiss down the side of your jaw, and you tilt your head to give him better access, gasping when he draws his tongue over the oversensitive skin of your neck; you can feel how he smiles against your skin before kissing your throat.

“Hobi,” you breathe, and then gasp when he draws the flat of his tongue over the hollow of your neck. Each teasing touch of his tongue and lips is trickling straight to your core, your panties growing wetter and wetter with your arousal. “Hobi, oh.”

“I’m going to worship you the way you deserve to be worshipped, princess,” he murmurs, lips moving against your collarbones as he speaks. “I’ve been waiting to do this for so long." He keeps kissing you between his words, punctuating them with sweeps of his tongue over your skin, and it's so much. "Hold still for me, baby, there you go.”

Hoseok releases your wrists and you flex your fingers but stay in that position, your hands palm up as they rest either side of your head. Hoseok leans back to stare at you underneath him, laid out for his gaze; you’re in an old t-shirt and faded pyjama bottoms, face bare, hair a haphazard mess where it rests against the pillow, but he looks at you like you’re the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen. Like you’re draped in diamonds and gold and silks. He looks at you with reverence and love, like he wants to cherish you- but there’s also something deeper in those half-lidded eyes of his, like he wants to swallow you whole.

“You’re so beautiful,” he breathes. You bite your lip, swallowing down a needy noise at the tone of his voice, hands clenching into fists where they rest beside your head.

“Hobi, please,” you say. “I need you.”

“You have me.” He takes one of his hands and slowly pushes the material of your shirt up, dragging his palm over your skin as he reveals the softness of your stomach. He lets the material bunch just under your breasts, ignoring how your nipples have hardened and stand out through the thin cotton of your old tee, running his fingers over your sides; you buck a little underneath him, sucking in a breath at how his touch is almost ticklish. “So sensitive.”

“You haven’t even touched me properly yet,” you say, a little snarky despite your breathlessness, but then you’re cut off when Hobi’s hands slide under the t-shirt to cup your breasts, palms and fingers cool against your overheated skin. Your pussy clenches when he flicks his thumbs over each of your hardened buds, running the pads of his fingertips over them, and you arch into his touch.

“So sensitive,” he says again, a little smile behind his words as he watches how your chest rises and falls under his hands, sucking in air when he pinches your nipples between his fingers. “Do you like that, baby?”

“Like it when you touch me,” you sigh. Hoseok smiles, flashing his teeth at you before leaning forward to kiss you again. He coaxes you to lift up a little so he can pull off your shirt, smoothing your hair when it gets ruffled by the motion, but before you can smile up at him for his tenderness, he lowers the heat of his mouth over one of your nipples and you gasp.

One of your hands flies up to grasp his hair when he circles the bud with his tongue, and you let out a low moan as he continues to lave attention on it, flattening his tongue and dragging it over the sensitive flesh. He alternates between your breasts, using his hands and fingers on whichever he’s not suckling between his lips; goosebumps erupt over your skin, and you keep biting back whines and gasps each time he does something particularly wicked with his mouth.

You feel so, so wet, arousal pooling between your legs, and you need him to touch you there. But he's slow, taking his time until your chest is heaving and your skin is flushed and your nipples are slick from the wetness of his mouth, his fingers just the right side of rough whenever he pinches the hardened peaks, and you mewl beneath him.

You’re just about to beg Hoseok to give you more when he finally lifts his mouth from your nipple, and you go tense as he starts to trail his lips down the valley of your breasts, across the sensitive skin of your stomach, hands roaming over the rest of you; he slides down the bed until he’s resting between your legs, and all you can think about is how close his mouth is to where you want it to be.

You’re so wet that you’ve soaked right through your panties, a touch of dampness clinging to the flimsy material of your pyjama bottoms too, and you shiver at the way Hoseok seems to drink down the sight before he hooks his fingers into the loose elastic waistband, and starts to inch them down. He’s moving torturously slowly, kissing your bare legs as he reveals your skin, touching his lips to your thighs, your calves, your ankles.

He does the same again with your panties, even more slowly; palms sliding up the side of your legs so he can curl his fingers around the fabric of your underwear and peel it off you. You shiver when your pussy is finally revealed, your inner thighs slick with your arousal and cooling from the touch of the air- Hoseok continues to suck and kiss trails across your legs even as he stares at your naked, weeping core, his gaze heavy as he drinks down the sight.

“You’re so beautiful,” he says, running his fingers over your bare skin as you tremble beneath him. “So gorgeous and perfect. Look at you, all laid out, just for me. I love you.”

“Hoseok,” you whimper. He’s still entirely clothed while you’re naked and bare, and you feel utterly debauched in comparison to him, the sheen of his saliva still shining over your body, nipples hard, your pussy lips flushed from arousal, every part of you begging for more- meanwhile he’s still got his surprisingly cute matching pyjama set on. The contrast is making your dizzy. He cups your foot in one of his hands, turning his head to press a kiss to your inner ankle, and your toes curl. “Please, baby, I need you.”

“I’ve got you, princess,” he murmurs. He drops one last kiss to your ankle before shifting towards your canting hips; his breath curls out over your core and you shudder, another flood of arousal shooting through you, your cunt clenching as Hoseok stares at it shamelessly. “Look at you,” he says, reverent. “So pretty and wet for me.”

“Hobi,” you whine. You bite back a gasp as he hooks your fingers behind your knees and forces your legs apart, spreading you open, entirely helpless underneath his hungry gaze. You watch in wonder as he lets his tongue curl out of his mouth, looking sinfully dirty as he does- but then you let out a whine when he turns his head away from your pussy and licks the inner seam of your thigh instead. Your hips jump at the sensation, your skin so sensitive from the attention that he’s lavishing on you, but it’s not where you want his mouth to be, even if the lingering kisses he’s giving to your inner thighs feel good. “Hoseok, please.”

He hums indulgently, and you’re about to start begging again when he purses his lips and blows out a puff of air over your flushed lower lips; the sudden chill against your damp folds has you tensing, and before you can gather your wits Hoseok drags his hot, wet tongue up the seam of your pussy to gather the wetness there. You cry out from the sudden explosion of sensation when he repeats the motion but presses past your lower lips to tongue at your slit, lapping up the juices at your entrance before circling your clit with the tip of his tongue, your spine arching as your hips buck. “Oh, God, Hoseok, yes, right there.”

He slides one of his arms over your stomach, trapping you, holding you down as you try to cant your hips towards his mouth. You sob with pleasure as he continues to drink down your juices, leisurely licking at the most sensitive parts of you, in no rush at all. “Hobi, please,” you beg. “Please, I need more.”

Hoseok turns his head to lightly bite your inner thigh, your leg twitching at the sensation, surprised at how pleasurable it is. “Ssh,” he murmurs. “I’ve been waiting to do this for a long time. I want to savour it,” he says, and you let out a whine when he dips his head back down and starts to lap at your clit again, his dark eyes watching each of your reactions, the way you writhe and curl your toes each time he dips back down to your entrance, pressing his tongue inside you. “You taste so good, baby. Your pretty little cunt is so perfect.”

You whine at the praise, writhing when each swipe of his tongue over you is fanning the flames of your arousal higher and higher, and you can feel how the coil inside you is tightening, so close to reaching your peak. Hoseok’s still eating you out, nice and slow, and you’ve never felt an orgasm creep up on you like this- you moan as Hoseok finally buries his face in your pussy, tongue sliding from your slit, to your clit, over and over.

It’s so, so good, and then you watch as he slides one of his long fingers inside you and curls it inside you just right- “I’m gonna cum, Hoseok, I’m- oh!”

The intensity of your orgasm hits you like a freight train, exploding from deep inside you. Your back arches off the bed and your toes curl as you cum and cum and cum, Hoseok keeping his mouth on you the whole time, your entire body shuddering as waves of pleasure wash over you, wetness flooding out of your cunt that he drinks down eagerly.

The build up was slow, and the come down is slow, too, aftershocks rippling through your body for longer than any orgasm you’ve had before, and Hoseok keeps licking and sucking you through it all until you’re almost crying out from the overstimulation and you have to push his head away. The aftershocks are still rippling through your body as Hoseok rises, your pussy clenching each time, and you feel boneless and strung out- but you know Hoseok isn’t done with you yet.

“So pretty when you cum for me,” he says. You reach out for him and he comes so easily, fitting himself between your arms. His lips and chin shine with evidence of your arousal and when you pull him in for a kiss you can taste yourself across his tongue, a noise bubbling up at the back of your throat when you feel how slick his lips are against yours.

“Wanna make you cum too,” you say, your voice weak after the strength of that orgasm; you take in a deep breath, willing the oxygen to bring some energy back into your body. “Baby. Hoseok.”

“Mm.” He kisses you again. “You will, baby, don’t worry, you’re always so good for me.”

Your fingers fumble when you try to unbutton his shirt, but when Hoseok laughs, it’s not patronising at all; he just sounds fond. He takes over, deft fingers making quick work of the shirt before he throws it aside, revealing the slim line of his body to you. He’s beautiful and lean, nipples dark, skin golden, with a dark trail of hair that dips down into his pyjama bottoms- your eyes zero in on the way Hoseok’s loose pyjamas do nothing to hide his erection, the hard strain of his cock against the fabric, and you let out a little sigh of happiness that you’re finally getting to see what you’ve been desperately staring at all day. When you reach out for him your fingers barely brush his skin, and you make a greedy little noise, hungry for more.

“Need you,” you say. You want Hobi inside you, splitting you open, as close to each other as you can physically be. “Clothes off now.”

Hobi lets out a loud laugh, and you melt at the utter joy in the sound, how his face is so open and bright.

“God, I love you,” he says, before unceremoniously shedding the offending garments. He wiggles his hips in an entirely unsexy manner, and you end up laughing too when he gets one of his legs caught and has to kick the pyjama bottoms off in an entirely graceless way. You’re still letting out quiet giggles even as Hoseok is finally bare in front of you, beautiful and unabashed in his nakedness, and you love him.

You feel like liquid sunlight, overflowing with happiness; you’ve never laughed like this with anyone before, both naked yet still somehow amused, flipping from all-consuming arousal one second to laughter the next, but it just feels natural. Because it’s Hoseok, and everything feels so easy with him.

“I love you too,” you say, and then, when your eyes drop to his cock, you say: “God, you’re beautiful.”

His cock is gorgeous, curving up towards the ceiling, a drop of precum beaded at the tip; it’s not completely straight, hanging just a little to the left, but it’s Hoseok, so it’s perfect. He wraps his fingers around your hips and you let out a little squeal when he tugs you down the bed towards him so that your legs are dangling off the side and your hips are practically flush; his cock bobs when he moves and you shiver with how close it is to your heated core. Just like the rest of him, it’s long and lean and gorgeous, and you can’t wait to have it inside you. Although-

“Don’t I get to taste you?” You can’t help but say this with a pout, and Hoseok’s face splits into a wide smile.

“Next time, baby,” he promises. “Tonight is for you.”

Next time. The realisation that tonight is just one of many, just the start of an entirely new chapter in your life with Hoseok- that you’ll still be friends, best friends, but also more- settles inside you, warm and soft and safe. Your face creases into a smile and you slide your hands up Hoseok’s body, over his stomach and chest, touching all the skin you can, relishing in the fact that you’ll grow familiar with it all in a way that you never could have dreamed of.

“You’re always so good to me,” you say.

“You deserve it, princess,” he replies. You tilt your hips towards him and you see how his eyes darken at the motion, tenderness swallowed by lust, and your body lights up like a livewire in preparation, ready to feel him push inside you. You’re already loose and wet from your first orgasm, but you don’t protest when Hoseok starts to run his fingers over the seam of your thigh; he presses straight in with two fingers, your body opening up for him so easily, and you gasp at how deep they move inside you, so long and pretty.

“There, Hobi, right there.” He’s clearly not trying to bring you to orgasm again but he still listens to your directions, keeping the motions of his hands the same, fingers rubbing over your inner walls so perfectly.

You can hear it, noises slick and dirty before he pulls them out, and you watch as he uses your arousal to slick up his cock, rubbing your juices over his hard length. It’s lewd, how he does it, pumping himself as he spreads it over his cock, wet noises vulgar and obscene, shooting straight to your core; you don’t think you’ve ever seen or heard anything so arousing in your life, the way Hoseok has his lip caught between his teeth as he looks at you, cock stiff between his legs as he runs his fingers over it.

“Oh, fuck,” you whimper. “Hoseok, fuck.”

You arch your back when he grips his cock in one hand, guiding himself towards you- but rather than pressing into your entrance he runs his throbbing length back and forth through your lips, gathering even more of the wetness there, the slide so easy and smooth. It’s the most delicious, glancing pressure against your clit, not enough to satisfy, but enough to have you gasping again, the way you can feel the silken heat of his cock against you.

“Hoseok, please.” You don’t attempt to hide the desperation in your voice. “I need you.”

Hoseok lets out a guttural groan at your words; he drinks in how blown your pupils are, the flush from your orgasm still visible over your chest, the way your fingers are clutching the bedsheets, white cotton tangled in your grasp. “Anything you want, baby,” he says, and finally, finally, he grasps his length and tilts it to your entrance. He rests there for a second, the tip barely touching you, and you see how he steels himself as he grasps your hips, before he starts to sink into you.

“Oh!” He fills you so well, inch by torturous inch, your body opening up for him so easily it’s like his cock was made to fill you; once he bottoms out you can feel how snug he is inside you, cockhead pressed against your cervix, and you shiver. “Oh, yes, Hoseok, so good.”

He stays still for one long, drawn out moment, before his hands slip off your waist and he reaches for yours. You entwine your fingers with his, staring up at him as he leans forward and kisses you; the motion has his cock shifting inside you and you whine a little against his lips, before biting off a gasp when he rocks his hips forwards. The motion is fluid and rolling, and Hoseok sets an unhurried pace, languidly filling you up with his cock, over and over and over.

The pleasure that’s growing in you is slow and relaxed. You’re not chasing your orgasms- you’re revelling in the closeness, the connection, the slip of skin against skin, how Hoseok is filling you up, how you’re drawing him in. You end up staring into each other’s eyes, Hoseok’s forehead pressed to yours so there’s nothing in your vision but him; you only break eye contact when one particularly deep roll of his hips sends a shudder through you, your eyes squeezing shut as you gasp.

“Feel so good, baby,” Hoseok murmurs. “So good for me.”

You make a noise of confusion when he lets go of your fingers and leans back, straightening up, but then he hooks his hands under your knees and you lift your hips; you drape your legs over his shoulders, arched towards him, lower body lifting off the mattress. Hoseok drives forward and you immediately gasp at how he hits your sweet spot straight on, the change of angle forcing the head of his cock to brush the top of your inner walls, each drag of the blunt head sending shocks of pleasure shooting through you.

“Wanna feel you cum around my cock, princess,” Hoseok says, and you shudder. “Can you do that for me?”

“Yes,” you breathe. “Yes, Hobi, yes- faster- oh-”

Hoseok starts to ramp up the pace, snapping his hips into yours with the sound of slapping skin, and you can feel how you’re starting to tighten around him, pussy clenching with each thrust of his hot cock inside you. “Gonna cum for you, Hobi,” you say. “So close, fuck.”

He takes one of his hands off your waist and slides three fingers over your clit, and you cry out with pleasure as he starts to rub at your bundle of nerves in tight circles; the added stimulation is just what you need, and you tumble over the edge into your second orgasm of the night. Hoseok moans when he feels how your cunt clenches around him, rippling tightness around his cock, and your eyes fall shut as your mouth falls open and you rock your hips into the sensation, grinding against Hoseok to prolong the pleasure, and he continues to snap his hips forward.

You go lax, almost limp, but Hoseok is still hard inside you, so you try your best to keep your back arched towards him; the fluid roll of his thrusts is starting to fall out of rhythm as he approaches his own peak, and although your pussy is crying out at the oversensitivity, you try to match his pace, canting your hips towards Hoseok each time he drives forward.

“Want your cum all over me, Hobi,” you say. “Want you to cum on my tits-”

Hoseok curses, composure slipping entirely for the first time all night, and you feel how he fumbles his rhythm before he catches himself. His thrusts are fast and choppy before he pulls out and drops your hips to the mattress; you whine at the sudden emptiness, but then he’s shuffling his knees onto the bed and he has his hand wrapped around his slick length, jerking himself hard and fast as you arch your back and push your chest towards him.

“So fucking beautiful,” he says through gritted teeth. “So pretty, baby- fuck!”

He gasps in air before he lets out one long, drawn out moan, and then there’s hot cum splattering across your breasts, whiteness painting itself across your skin. Hoseok continues to pump himself, cock letting out more ropes of cum, and you can’t help but let out a noise of satisfaction at the sight, lifting your hands to run over his hip bones and waist and flexing thighs, watching the way Hoseok’s face draws together as he rides out his own orgasm, until his hand falls away from his cock and he’s slumping forwards over you, panting.

You hum, reaching for him and pulling him down so you can brush your lips against his. “You’re so hot when you cum,” you say. “I could watch you cum all day.”

Hoseok lets out a breathless laugh before he kisses you again, properly this time- you’re content to keep kissing regardless of the cum that’s starting to cool on your chest, but Hoseok is insistent on being a gentleman and excuses himself to the bathroom to get a towel so he can clean you up. When he drags the damp towel over your skin, he’s so soft and gentle, although you still shiver a little when the rough fabric drags over your nipples; he bends down and kisses you in apology.

You feel warm and small and soft, watching as Hoseok walks around the bed, still naked; the paltry lamp light is still more than enough for you to see every line of his beauty, the way each of his muscles shifts under his skin as he walks and moves, bending over to gather some of the discarded clothes from the floor. You sit up and lift your arms so he can help you back into your thin t-shirt, cupping his face in your hands and kissing him with a firm press of your lips, before he shimmies back into his boxers, though you personally don’t think he needs them.

When you finally settle down for the night you both curled up on your bed- because Hoseok’s is rumpled and sweaty from your previous exertions- and nestle up gratefully under the sheets, warm from the weight of the duvet and Hoseok spooning you from behind.

“I love you,” he murmurs, nosing at the side of your neck.

“I love you too,” you reply, and then end up giggling a little, stomach jumping under Hoseok’s hand. “I need to buy Namjoon a thank you slash apology gift when we get home, you know,” you say thoughtfully. “He had to put up with me having a meltdown about you, and it turns out he was right.”

Hoseok brushes his nose over your ear. “Jin kept making pretty blasé comments to me about us,” he tells you. “But he does that about most things, so.”

You hum lightly before pressing back further against Hoseok, who tightens his hold around you in response. “I guess they knew before we did,” you say. “We’ve been acting like a couple for a long time, to be fair.” Thinking back on it, it was pretty obvious, but hindsight is 20/20, as they say.

The next morning, as always, you wake before Hoseok- and this time when you feel the hardness pressed into your ass, you don’t panic. You do what you always do and slide carefully out of Hoseok’s arms, but unlike every other morning, he doesn’t wake up to an empty bed. Instead, he wakes up with a small gasp to the sight of you with your mouth around his cock, your eyes wide and innocent as you stare up at him; you work him up while he’s still half-asleep and slow, swallowing down his cock until he cums down your throat. You litter kisses over his hips and thighs, smiling into his skin as he comes down from his peak, his pupils blown.

“Morning, Hobi,” you say, kissing the divot below his hip bones. “I love you.”

“Come here,” he says, voice still a rasp from his sleep, eyes hungry as he reaches for you.

When the two of you eventually stumble downstairs for breakfast, Jimin and Taehyung are already there; you’re much later than normal but neither of the boys seems to notice anything out of the ordinary, Taehyung asking Hoseok to pass the pepper mill as soon as you’ve sat down.

Taehyung is enthusiastically grinding pepper over his bacon and eggs when Jimin pipes up. “You know, the ghosts in this B&B apparently like to watch the guests while they try to sleep and make noises to keep them up,” he says conversationally. “You didn’t happen to notice anything out of the ordinary in your room, did you? Taehyung and I could have sworn that we heard moaning or something at some point, but I think it must have been a trick of our minds.”

You and Hoseok exchange a quick glance. “Uh, nope, can’t say that we did,” you say, and Hoseok nods emphatically in agreement.

Jimin pauses. He squints at you, before turning to Taehyung and pulling the pepper mill out of his hands to get his attention. “I told you it was going to happen soon,” Jimin says. “They finally hit critical mass and confessed. I knew that moaning wasn’t from ghosts.”

“And there’s no mess to clean up, even if we didn’t win the betting pool.” Taehyung sounds pleased. “Can you pass the salt now please?”

You watch incredulously as both boys continue their business as usual, Taehyung swapping the pepper mill for the salt grinder while Jimin opens a tiny jar of raspberry jam for his toast.

You turn to Hoseok, scandalised at the idea that a) your friends/co-workers heard you last night and b) there’s apparently some sort of office bet about your relationship with Hoseok, only to find that the man in question has a look of alarm on his face.

“Do you think the ghosts were watching us last night?” He has an expression that’s a mix of affronted and also scared. “That’s dirty.”

“No, baby, I don’t think we had ghostly voyeurs in our room,” you say, stroking Hoseok’s hand with reassuring fingers, before you frown and look back at the other two boys. “I hate our friends. You have a betting pool?”

“Yeah, it’s pretty big,” Taehyung says. “I’m not sure who’s won the money, I’d have to check the spreadsheet when we get back home.”

“I bet Jin was the one who came up with it, wasn’t he?” Taehyung and Jimin exchange a look, but neither of them say anything, which is more than enough to answer your question. “I’m going to shove a wedge of parmesan down his throat when we get home and see how he likes it.”

“I love you,” Hoseok says.

“I love you too,” you reply, turning your head to accept the kiss he gives you.

“You’re so cute,” Jimin says.

“Why parmesan?” Taehyung asks, before twisting the salt grinder with enough gusto that he pulls the bottom off and salt goes cascading over his breakfast. “Oh, oops. Do you think they’ll let me have more eggs?”

Your thank you/apology gift to Namjoon is a tin of Scottish shortbread that you find in a cute tourist shop, although when you find out he’s actually the proud winner of 50% of the betting pool, you take the shortbread back for yourself and Hoseok instead.

When Yoongi arrives at his desk to the sight of you sitting in Hoseok’s lap and feeding him between kisses, he just rolls his eyes, mutters ‘finally’, and makes no further comments. You laugh into Hoseok’s mouth and allow Jungkook to steal a piece of shortbread on his way past, too busy kissing your boyfriend to care.

“You can have the last bit of shortbread,” you say, and Hoseok grins up at you.

“You’re just saying that because I ate you out this morning,” he says, and you giggle.

“I can’t believe you just made me listen to that with my own two ears. I’m in hell.” Yoongi sounds so tired. “I think I preferred it when the two of you were dancing around each other. Go back to doing that.”

“No can do, Yoongles,” you sing-song. “I love Hoseok and I’m going to make sure everyone knows it.”

“I love you too,” Hoseok says, looking up at you with bright eyes, and you giggle before dipping down to kiss him again.

“Everyone else knew before you did,” Yoongi mutters, but neither of you pay him any mind.

#jhope x reader #hoseok x reader #hoseok smut #jhope smut #bts x reader #jhope fluff #hoseok fluff #bts #jhope #jung hoseok #joy.masterlist

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purplesurveys · 3 years

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1279

Are you and the last person you kissed in a relationship or just friends? I don’t keep contact.

Has anyone ever pointed out that your laugh was unusual? Hmmmm, I don’t think so. I feel like that would be the type of comment that would get to me so I definitely would’ve remembered it.

Would you get a lip piercing? I don’t plan on getting any piercings.

Nose piercing? Nopes.

What are you currently waiting for? For this fucking day to end so I can be closer to Thursday and to the weekend.

Do you have feelings for anyone? Nah.

Have you ever run over an animal? Nope. I’ve had extremely close calls with animals who suddenly dart into the road, but fortunately these have all been situations wherein I got to hit the brakes with nobody behind me.

Have you chewed gum after someone else already has? That’s disgusting, no.

When people sneeze do you say ‘bless you’? Sure, out of habit and just to be polite.

When was the last time you were on a bouncy castle? I don’t think I’ve ever been on a bouncy castle, but I’ve been on a lot of bouncy other things haha, like inflatable slides, soccer balls, Anpanmans, etc. The last time would probably be a nearly a decade ago; I definitely haven’t been near one in a while.

Have you ever went on a bouncy castle whilst drunk? Well no, because the ones I’ve been on were situated in school fairs, which is the last place I would want to be drunk in.

Have you ever entered an art competition? No, I have no justification to join one haha.

What is one thing you will never do? Try hardcore drugs. < Same.

What is one food that you detest? Pineapples.

Did you have a rebellious phase growing up? Yeah I was a bit of a handful to raise, but I’m in firm in my stance that it had a lot to do with the way I was raised. I grew up mostly without a father figure because my dad worked abroad and I felt neglected by my mom who had her own shit to deal with. There was no stable support system to lean on, so I ended up lashing out a lot in my puberty years. Unfortunately everyone else just saw a rebellious child and not a plea for help.

These days when I show off my achievements on social media, I’ll see congratulatory comments from my mom’s friends and she’ll usually go on about some “late bloomers grow with time” narrative and it pisses me off because nobody knows how much I’ve had to grow and mature and learn how to be happier all by myself, all from scratch. If I had just received the proper care and attention early on, I wouldn’t have had to do any catching up to begin with.

What religion were you brought up with? Roman Catholic.

Are you still that religion? Jesus no. I darted out of there as soon as I gained the consciousness to think about these sorts of things.

Do you often find yourself questioning your future? Sometimes, but I do my best to not let it get to me.

How many friends do you have on Facebook? Over 670.

What sort of music did you listen to when you were in high school? I started with punk rock in the first half of high school, so I had my Rancids, H2Os, Against Me!s, Cro-Mags, etc on my iPod. It evolved a little bit towards more indie, folksy sounds towards the latter half - Banks, alt-J, Hozier, Twenty One Pilots - which I largely attribute to the crowd I was part of at the time.

What pet names do you use with your significant other? I’m pretty straightforward so baby works out for me. Other, more specific pet names just grow naturally with the relationship, I think.

What’s the name of the store you usually get your groceries? S&R.

Have you ever seen a theatre show? Yeah. Most of them have been required.

What’s your favourite vegetable? Broccoli or bell peppers.

Have you ever missed a flight? Never. I’ve experienced several delayed flights, though, which is always such a hassle especially if the delays happen in provincial airports since they never have any recreational offers to keep passengers from getting bored other than TVs that run the same damn five ads.

Do your neighbours have any pets? Have you ever met them? Yeah, a lot of have dogs. I’ve met some.

What color is your bedroom door? Brown.

If you were ever to become famous, would you grow annoyed at fans? Only towards obsessive ones who wouldn’t give me time to breathe or would go so far so as to stalk me or my loved ones. But I am a fan too, so I imagine I would actually be understanding of those who would ask for pictures or whatever as long as they were polite and not at all intrusive.

Have you ever met your favourite band/singer? Nah. I am terrified of meeting celebrities HAHA so I’ve always shut down the chance. I’m pretty sure I would actually turn down the chance to meet BTS if I hypothetically suddenly got the magic keys to that door.

Are you embarrassed by any of the songs/singers/bands you like? No. I feel like that sort of thing just happens in like high school, when your friends are still a bit judgmental. Nowadays I don’t see why I should be embarrassed of anything I like, especially if it’s not hurting anyone.

Have you ever written a story? I’ve made attempts but was always terrible.

Think of the last poem you wrote: What inspired you to write it? My homework that required me to write said poem hahaha.

Do you have a chance with the person you like right now?

What’s the weirdest thing you were scared of as a child? Watching commercials at night. It’s still a slight fear of mine but it’s mostly dissipated now.

Are there any embarrassing stories your family tells about you? About me? No. I don’t have a lot of those since I was a really shy kid who barely moved a finger anyway.

In your opinion, what is the funniest TV show? I have a *really* soft spot for Perfect Strangers, which I actually revisited yesterday :) The show was never super popular so it’s near impossible to find clips online, but when I checked YouTube I did see a slight increase in short snippets from the show so I had a really fun time binge-watching yesterday.

What is the maximum number of children you’d ever have? Three, but that’s pushing it. Ideally, I’d have two so my first would have company.

Have you ever been concerned you had a serious illness? Mental ones, yes.

Are you comfortable with who you are? For the most part, yes.

Would you date someone even if you knew you’d get made fun of for it? No. Why would it be any of their business?

Does popularity matter to you at all? I mean, yeah in the sense that I honestly aspire to be well-liked by as many people as possible. But I don’t necessarily want to rub shoulders with popular kids.

Would you ever consider homeschooling your children? Continued from sometime this week ider. No. I don’t think I’m capable of teaching, and generally I’d want them to be able to learn in a more open environment where they can have regular contact with different kinds of people.

Who told you about the band/singer you are currently listening to? Well Angela got into them first and since we’re best friends, there was a certain point where she just decided to loop me into conversations that involved them. I was impossible to sway for a long time, but then one day a video compilation of them showed up on my feed, and for some reason I actually watched it, and I watched all the way through, and I was immediately intrigued – particularly by J-Hope haha. I then asked Angela to tell me more about them and the rest was...financially irresponsible history HAHAHAHA

Do you ever read fanfiction? OMG yes. Funny you should mention that because my favorite author uploaded a brand new fic this morning, which I obviously couldn’t get to all day because I had to go to work. I’ll be reading it in all its 44,000-word glory tonight :D

Would you rather die in a plane crash, ship wreck or fire? Plane crash. Instant and mostly painless.

What are your top five favourite TV shows? Breaking Bad, BoJack Horseman, Friends, The Crown even though I was never able to continue it since...andddd that’s all I got.

What is your favorite superhero movie? Not a fan of superhero movies.

If you died next week, what would be the cause of death? Stress from overworking. I’ve FINALLY started to consider taking a leave for the first time this year because I’ve just realized just how fucking exhausted, burned out, and overwhelmed I actually already am from having no rest at all in the last 13 months.

Have you ever taken a break from Facebook or other social media? Why? Yes, I do mass deactivations when I’m severely depressed. These days I can’t really afford to that anymore, though, since my work is closely tied to social media.

Who is the most talented person you know? Probably Andi.

Are you currently platonic friends with anyone you’ve had sex with? No.

Where did you and your current interest go on your first date?

Have you ever experienced two people fighting over you (physically or mentally)? What happened? Nah. I’ve had two people like me at the same time, but there was never any tension to watch out for since they mostly didn’t know each other.

Have your parents ever thought you were gay? What happened? I think they know I dated Gabie and that we broke up because they’ve stopped asking about her. Everyone knew we were best friends, so the fact that they’ve avoided her as a topic for a whole year is able to tell me something.

Are your parents more liberal or conservative? Dad’s on the liberal side, mom dances around on the spectrum a little bit. I know she’s fine with things like tattoos and having LGBTQ+ co-workers, but she’s also conservative especially towards matters like religion.

What year are you going into at the beginning of the next academic year? No longer in school.

How far away does your closest family member live? A few footsteps away.

If you’ve seen both, did you prefer the Disney version or the Tim Burton version of Alice in Wonderland? It’s not my type of movie/genre to begin with.

Would you have sex before marriage? Why or why not? Yes. I don’t see the big deal; I’ve already done it anyway.

Are you more liberal or conservative? Liberal.

Who is your favorite Harry Potter character? Ooh not sure. I haven’t gone back to the books in a while, so I don’t remember if there was anyone I had an attachment to.

What’s the worst that could come out of letting gays marry? Nothing.

What’s the most sexual thing you’ve done? Had sex...I guess? And a bunch of stuff that comes with it.

Name something that you are against. Racial discrimination.

Why are you against it? Because it is infuriating to see, and it shows me the very same treatment can happen to me or my family as well and that scares me, especially since some people turn particularly violent towards people of color.

Have you ever played the Tomb Raider games? No.

Do you like it or hate it when your partner is clingy? I imagine I wouldn’t enjoy it if I’m not as into whoever my next partner would be.

Beatles or Rolling Stones? I don’t listen to either.

When was the last time you changed your opinion on somebody? Not so sure about a whole change in opinion because that hasn’t happened in a while, but I grew more grateful for my manager today because I finally mustered the strength to tell her that I’m begin to struggle mentally with work and she not only encouraged (read: begged) me to file a damn leave for once, but she also got sushi delivered to my place.

What was the last thing that made you feel proud and why? Andi was telling me about their day today and how they handled being misgendered by a prof, who then proceeded to throw a fit when he got corrected, and how they, again, maturely handled said fit. I was proud of them because there are a million ways that incident could’ve turned out, but they dealt with it in an extremely mature and calm manner considering they were the one who was wronged.

Do you feel uncomfortable when people you hardly know confide in you? If it was about an extremely personal problem I would probably be taken aback at first, but I still would definitely make some time for them and help in however way I can, since they apparently trust me enough to confide.

What was the last thing to fascinate you? The music video for My Universe! Super cool to watch and I love that they made a short film out of it too.

Is there a certain noise/sound which scares you? Doors being slammed shut, because that’s what my mom does when she’s furious. She did that when I was a kid and she does it to this day, so I get extremely nervous when I hear the sound, even if it happens by accident.

Do you have a favourite microorganism? Nope.

Out of the people you know, whose birthday is next? My cousin Bree.

If you have pet fish do you bother to name them? I did when I had them as a kid.

Do you keep your eggs in the fridge? Yes?

Have you ever owned chickens? Nope.

When did you last listen to music? Like five minutes ago. I tried to have a jazz playlist on but I realized I wasn’t in the mood for music so I changed my background noise to have a random VLive on instead.

#surveys #survey

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hopevalley · 3 years

Text

Season 8, Episode 3: From the Ashes

Intro -

Scene 1: Freedom-Alls

Well, folks, we start out with Rosemary and Elizabeth discussing the latest and greatest trend of the western world (or attempt at a trend): Freedom-Alls! Patented in April 1918 by Levi Strauss & Co., Freedom-Alls were a women’s one-piece suit intended to appeal specifically toward ladies who lived out west and wanted to take advantage of the areas and work they did for a living (ranchwork, farming, hiking, et cetera). It was introduced alongside Kover-Ups (a one-piece suit for men) and Koveralls (a one piece denim suit for children).

You can read a little more about them here.

Unfortunately Freedom-Alls didn’t really catch on; they were, perhaps, a little too ahead of their time. But guess what? It means this season of When Calls the Heart takes place in 1918!

Rosemary says she’s trying to support Clara’s ideas by trying to sell the Freedom-Alls and that she “can’t run the dress shop forever.” When Elizabeth tries to talk to Rosemary about it, she changes the direction of the conversation to Nathan and Lucas. Elizabeth admits she feels bad for having ridden off on Nathan, and Rosemary gets a weird line: “But who knows what might have happened between you two if you hadn’t?” I’m not sure what to make of this... With modern viewers it almost sounds like they might have had sex or something if left alone, but really I think they want to hint that they might have said regrettable things. I think that line could have used a bit of a tweak.

Elizabeth goes on to say it was right to choose not to be with Nathan but she hasn’t chosen Lucas either, and in fact does not want to even speak to Lucas until his mother tells him the truth about his father. One thing I really appreciate about this scene, and in fact this whole plot, is that Rosemary knows the hot gossip but she doesn’t repeat it to anyone else. In fact, she makes sure Elizabeth knows immediately that Lucas is standing behind her before he can hear her say anything, and when given a very obvious opportunity to intervene (when Lucas says he’s going to call his father) she elects to stay out of it.

I’ve been a little worried about Rosemary’s character writing in the past; they tend to bounce between wholesome and entertaining to cringey and embarrassing without...really meaning to, or without thinking about what kind of person that creates on-screen. This episode, and in particular this first scene, really makes up for a lot of past problems with her writing.

Also, Lucas was just really cute and wholesome at the end of the scene and I liked that.

Scene 2: Bill’s Land & The Inquiry

Bill stops Nathan and lets him know that he’s still working on Allie’s official adoption but it’ll still be a few weeks, and Nathan is understanding about this. Bill then brings up his land that Nathan seemed interested in buying. He says he has another potential buyer that’s been asking about it, and Nathan says he changed his mind about it.

Before they can really get into any sort of conversation about it, another Mountie approaches. Bill refers to him by his first name (Andrew) and then his title to congratulate him on a promotion (Superintendent Hargraves). He tells Bill that he learned from the best.

When Bill tries to introduce Nathan to Andrew, Nathan says they already know one another. When Bill asks what Andrew is doing in Hope Valley, he says he has a matter to discuss with Nathan and Bill says he hopes they can find the time to catch up before he leaves town again.

Bill leaves, and Andrew tells Nathan that due to the fact that a Mountie lost his life last year during the shooting, they’re opening up another internal inquiry (which means they already did one) and that Nathan is the focus of it.

“to determine your possible culpability as to whether or not you were at fault.”

Apparently this also means his career as a Mountie is at stake.

There’s not a lot to discuss this early in the episode about this plotline, but I do wonder if Bill actually has a potential different buyer for his land or not. I don’t think Bill is above pretending he has another buyer to push Nathan into making a decision either way, but if he actually does have someone else interested, that could be interesting.

As to Nathan, it’s pretty clear Andrew Hargraves doesn’t care for Nathan.

Scene 3: The Introduction of The Chair

Molly and Florence talk about a crate that is sitting outside and Molly asks Florence if it might be the beehive that Florence ordered for Ned for his birthday. Florence shushes her (worried Ned will hear, as this is clearly meant to be a surprise) and says no it isn’t; her order has been delayed.

Molly goes on to say that she’s thinking of taking a cue from Florence and wants to buy Bill something for his birthday. Molly asks for Florence’s advice on what to get and Florence can’t help her:

Florence stares at her with...honestly kind of a sad expression after this? I don’t know what to make of that. Molly tries to say she’s kidding but Florence isn’t stupid enough to believe it.

I’m not exactly thrilled with this storyline (nobody is surprised yet again lol), but one thing I really hope they bother taking the time to do is...you know...show why Molly might be interested in Bill. They don’t really have a particular chemistry I think, so...right now it just feels like Pair the Spares because nobody else in town is of the right age and available (except Henry and I can’t see that working well). If they’re going to bother with it, I really hope it’s either “Molly’s just lonely, actually” or “She likes him because XYZ” and not that weird middle thing where it’s hard to understand why either person would like the other...which has been a problem in this show’s writing since about Season 4.

The camera pans out to the mysterious crate. Ned wants to guess what’s in the crate but doesn’t get the chance before Jesse announces what it is to everyone (and Ned is sad about this haha). Cute little bit, honestly; you can tell the dialogue in this season has gotten a glow-up.

Jesse is disgruntled about the chair’s existence (why would you ship a chair halfway across the world?) and tries to sit in it to see if it’s a good chair but Lee tells him it’s bad luck to do that. The person for whom the chair was made has to be the first one to sit in it! He asks Jesse to take the chair to his house and move his motorcycle to the mill.

This is overall a nice scene. People feel...like people. And they carried over Lee’s back injury because now he’s wearing a back brace. This follow-through, this continuation from episode to episode, makes a big difference in the quality of writing, IMO.

Scene 4: Nichols & Dimes

Fiona is just getting done trimming Lucas’s beard and makes a comment about how if he wants it all shaved off she’ll be happy to do it because she’s curious to see what is hiding underneath it. Faith walks in and when Lucas asks her opinion, she has the same answer: “I’d be curious to see!”

Lucas considers this a moment and asks to think about it. She dusts off Lucas’s shoulders with her brush and asks Faith if she has time to chat and Faith says for a moment. Lucas gets up and pays Fiona, but it’s too much money so she tries to get him to take it back but he insists she keep it.

“Besides, after I meet Lee about a lumber order, I might need a free haircut.” Fiona only can say after he leaves, “He is so nice.”

Do we have a Fiona/Lucas hint? Or is this to show up how generous a person Lucas is? Or perhaps...how kind the people in this town are that they know to help out where and how they can?

Scene 5: Boy Meets Bike

Jesse drops off the chair at Rosemary and Lee’s house and goes out back to uncover the MOTORCYCLE. This is a man in love with a machine right here.

Scene 6: The Oil Rig

Lee promises Lucas a lumber order by the end of the week and Hickam stops Lucas to talk about the fact that the men think they should drill further (another 50 feet). Lucas seems to be having some...regrets about having gotten into the oil business (it is lucrative but it’s also a lot of work and with a very serious uh...potential for failure).

Lucas says (to Lee) that 50 feet becomes 100 feet becomes 300 feet (increasing costs of course, with no guaranteed payout), and jokingly (sort of) asks Lee if he wants to buy an oil well. Lee just laughs and says he doesn’t think so.

Scene 7: The Motorcycle No-Nos

Hope Valley really isn’t ready for Freedom-Alls after all. On the plus side, Dottie gets a mention! She sent over a beautiful dress (I think this is the one we see Molly wearing in the promo images for a later episode) from Union City. Clara laments having to replace the Freedom-Alls in the window just as Jesse pulls up on the motorcycle he’s moving for Lee.

Rosemary scolds her and tells him not to make Clara a widow (very insensitive choice, not sure they thought this through before they included that... She already IS a widow...and through no real fault of her husband). Rosemary said the danger is why she wanted Lee to sell the motorcycle and Jesse says, “You know, Lee always said you loved riding on the back of the motorcycle” which seems to upset Rosemary a bit. She tells him that was a long time ago and they’re married now and she wants Lee to sell it to the first person to make a good/fair offer.

Scene 8: Editing Woes

Helen is trying to go over Elizabeth’s manuscript with her but Elizabeth is completely zoning out and Helen is kind of sick of it.

She asks Elizabeth what the problem is and they talk about Lucas’s lack of knowledge about his father. Helen doesn’t want to talk about this and suggests they get back to work. Elizabeth asks to open the window (probably hoping some fresh air will clear her head). When she goes to open it, though, she sees Nathan and Bill talking animatedly by the blacksmith/farrier.

Helen confronts her about her feelings for Nathan and for Lucas, and Elizabeth asks if they can get back to work.

This is probably one of the weaker scenes. Helen pries too much and doesn’t seem the type to do so without good reason. I’m not sure how I would word it instead but the audience already knows Elizabeth has feelings for both men, and the scene with Rosemary sufficed at explaining Elizabeth’s stance on things.

I feel like this mostly made Helen look prickly and nosy...and it wasn’t doing either character any real favors.

Scene 9: Henry’s Flowers

Henry walks into the mercantile with some flowers and I definitely thought he was going to give them to Ned! (Let the shipping BEGIN...)

He apologizes very thoughtfully to Ned and I can honestly say this is one of the best scenes both men have gotten on this show and I really appreciate it. It was wholesome and kind, and I definitely think with the way Ned brushed things off that he at least read that first letter.

Florence kind of stands up as Henry starts talking (probably thinking she’ll have to yell at him again lmao), but Henry walks up to her and gives her the flowers, saying she was right to be angry with him and he hopes they can move past it.

Henry leaves and Ned’s like heyyy I was the one he yelled at and Florence tells him that’s true, but...she defended him and Ned seems a little...touched by that and says, “Yes...you did.”

Wholesome...good. Nice scene.

Scene 10: Motorcycle Absolutely Nots

Jesse brings the motorcycle to Clara again and tries to appeal to her using logic that my own husband would use if it meant he could possess yet another motored vehicle.

Same Clara!!!

I’m a little amused by this and also kind of like...meh about it. These characters had a long time to get to know one another and court before they got married and now Jesse’s just...Like This? It’s not that I’m against the plotline, but...I don’t know exactly how I feel about it right now. It’s funny but something still feels tonally off about it to me...

Scene 11: Inquiry Part II

Bill reads the inquiry notice that was given to Nathan and says it doesn’t seem right to him. Nathan says he tried to explain that earlier (must have been the conversation by the blacksmith). Bill goes on to say the Mounties can of course do this as it’s well within their rights and that...it’s possible it’s just...a formality? Andrew’s a good Mountie and a stickler for detail so--

Nathan seems annoyed at this and says “That’s one way of putting it” which of course prompts Bill to ask why they don’t get along. Nathan will only tell him that they’ve crossed paths before but refuses to elaborate.

It’s pretty clear that in whatever capacity they crossed paths before, it wasn’t exactly...friendly.

I also wonder if this man has been in a previous episode? He seems familiar but I couldn’t find anything with a quick Google search.

Scene 12: OIL! And uh, fire. Yeah.

Lucas and Mike Hickam talk about the oil business and Lucas admits that if they don’t see oil soon he’s going to just shut the entire thing down. Mike wants to react to this but there’s a ruckus at the well that isn’t normal so he runs over to the men and insists they get out of there right away.

They get oil! And then a spark catches. If you were confused about what supposedly caused the spark, it was this:

The metal of the wire rubbing against the metal of the pipe, causing friction. To be clear...the wire would be so coated in oil it wouldn’t be likely to catch fire in this scenario, but eh, we can ignore that. It was at least an attempt, and considering some of their past attempts this one was pretty good, actually.

For some reason the town has a real siren (more accurate would probably be a fire bell) and everyone freaks out.

Bill tells everyone to stay where they are and Fiona says “We can help!” and Bill says if they need more help they’ll call for more men. Fiona’s like:

I kind of missed that line my first watchthrough but I’m belatedly annoyed with that “Let’s make this look kind of misogynistic and make Fiona a Feminist Icon™ (as if she isn’t already good enough like??? what). It’s literally an OIL WELL FIRE. It might burn for WEEKS. It’s INCREDIBLY DANGEROUS and if you get too close you’ll be lucky if you’re not covered in burns.

They’ll get men because they’re more likely to be wearing the proper clothing and have the proper knowledge. Also, there are plenty of men on sight already. Why risk more casualties (or any if there aren’t already some, which of course Bill doesn’t know about).

It’s not that I don’t appreciate some good women-getting-involved writing, but this reads very much like it was written by a man.

That said, Henry’s determined face when he saw the fire was GOOD. He’s blurry but he’s MOVING FAST.

Scene 13: The Fire

Mike Hickam has burns on his face, Lucas has been knocked down, and everyone is in a panic. NATHAN IS ON THE SCENE.

IDK........I’d ship it.

Nathan asks Lucas how to put the fire out, and Lucas...doesn’t know. How could he know? He’s involved and he’s the owner of the operation, but he has absolutely (or nearly) no practical experience. BOOM HENRY IS ON THE SCENE.

He suggests they get some dynamite. A LOT OF IT.

They gather enough dynamite to blow an entire quarry sky-high. (My husband and I work in construction and this is more dynamite than we use to do blasting in the quarries. A few years ago we did our biggest blasting job ever in our largest quarry and we didn’t even use that many explosives lol...)

I would imagine your average person wouldn’t know that, though, so...I’ll give it a pass. Ned comes to help, and Jesse, and then Fiona shows up just in time to ask if the one more person to help they need needs to be a man. She then proceeds to stand at the back of the group. She’s also the first person to drop the cart lol... -_-

I can’t imagine being in town for all of this. It would probably be terrifying. Imagine being Florence or Molly who lived through the mine explosion. PTSD right there fellas.

And it’s over like...in two seconds.

People hugging all over the place.

Even though I was a little shocked the drama didn’t last longer, it was probably for the best. As much as I like drama, this isn’t the kind of drama that makes sense to be dragged out. If you don’t act fast there’s no chance to act at all, and you’re either successful with the dynamite attempt or you’re not. Either way, the town would be lost if the fire burned for too long, so it was worth a shot. Just...not with THAT much dynamite.

Also, using dynamite to snuff out oil fires was the first proven accurate method of putting out oil well fires! It basically uses the dynamite explosion to “blow out” the fire by forcing the furning fuel and oxygen away from the fuel source. It’s still used, and its first successful use (that we have record of) was in 1913. You can read more about oil well fires here.

Scene 14: Kindness

Lucas and Henry run into one another outside of Abigail’s Café and agree to meet outside the mercantile when Lucas is done chatting with her. Inside Abigail’s, Mike Hickam is dabbing (antiseptic?) on his burned face while Bill and Helen are chatting.

Helen is a bit upset that Lucas helped with the fire because it frightened her—the thought of losing him. He responds by saying he had to help and that she is being dramatic, but then apologizes and says, “I love you, too.” I think this is a sign he understands his mother more than we realize.

They agree to have lunch together at the saloon and Lucas says he couldn’t reach his father. Helen says she doesn’t know where he is but she’ll try to reach him.

Lucas tries to say something to Mike but Mike insists he won’t take a vacation; he was only doing his job.

Then Bill stops by with another plate of food for Mike and insists that it’s free just like the first plate.

I’m pretty sure this scene + the barbershop one earlier were just showing us how good and wholesome the people in Hope Valley are. They support each other and SHOW THEY CARE. I like it. :)

Scene 15: The Letter

At the mercantile Henry finally gets a letter!

It’s from “Christopher Hughes” in Cape Fullerton.

Henry stares at the letter for a long moment but says nothing is wrong.

Ned limps away as Henry leaves the mercantile to wait for Lucas and Florence scolds him for being stubborn.

There is a Romantic Sort of Moment...

And Florence talks about how gallant Ned was during the fire... A little spice is in the air methinks!!

Scene 16: THE LETTER PART TWO

Lucas stops by Henry’s car to say thanks for yesterday (the fire advice) and then tells him that even though he doesn’t agree with all of Henry’s terms/methods he does want him to come back to work.

Henry’s response? “I’ll think about it.”

This man is RATTLED by that letter! Lucas is shocked that Henry isn’t as on board as he was just the other day...

Scene 17: Chair Adjustment

Lee moves the chair around the house trying to find the perfect spot, and he refuses to sit in the chair until he gets his back brace off. It’s a pretty wholesome and fun scene; it manages to be lightly funny without trying too hard, and the best part about it is actually that they take the time to weave other characters into the dialogue more. “Carson wants me to walk; he says it’s good for my back.”

This is the stuff dreams are made of, folks!

Jesse drives up on the bike as Lee comes out of the house and he tells Lee that he wants to buy it off of him. When asked what Clara thinks of it, Jesse says:

This is going to be a big problem later. Lee says Jesse can buy it for $5.00 less than asking and Jesse rides off excited.

Scene 18: Trouble at the Infirmary

Florence apparently was successful in her attempt to drag Ned to the infirmary because he’s getting his foot looked at. When asked how he got the injury, he says he must have stepped in a hole or something, and Florence adds her heroic spin on things:

Faith tells Ned there’s some swelling with indicates a mild lateral sprain, and that the best thing for him to do will be to stay off of his foot for a week. She turns to Molly to suggest getting some crutches and Carson steps in to ask what Ned did to himself and begins his own exam, asking Ned which way his foot turned in/which way causes pain.

He then turns to Faith and explains that with a lateral sprain the foot turns inward, but with a high ankle sprain it turns outward (which is Ned’s problem).

Faith tries to explain that if you feel the tendon--

But Carson cuts her off and says that Faith will wrap it up nice and tight for him and he can go back to his regularly scheduled heroics immediately.

This angers Faith and makes Molly uncomfortable.

Scene 19: Goodbye Sweet Chair (I Hardly Knew Ye)

Rosemary approaches Elizabeth and they talk about how Elizabeth and Jack want to start a garden in the backyard, but first she has to go to town and speak with Bill. Rosemary offers to babysit and do the planting with Jack herself, and Elizabeth agrees to it.

They go over to Rosemary’s and Jack sees the NEW CHAIR and makes a beeline for it. Rosemary stops him from sitting in the chair but...overcome by curiosity she herself sits in it...

...and it breaks.

Scene 20: Elizabeth’s No Good, Horrible, Very Bad Day

Elizabeth presumably asked Bill what was going on with Nathan, and Bill explains that one of the superintendents, “an old friend” of his, gave Nathan some bad news. The Mounties are investigating last autumn’s prisoner transfer shooting. She asks why, when it was already completed, and he tries to calm her down by saying it’s an inside investigation and the Mounties always try to better perform their duties (the suggestion here is that they do this by reviewing recent cases).

After Elizabeth pesters Bill about it a little more, he folds and admits that it’s all very unusual and he has no clue why they’d have an inquiry about that case. He promises Elizabeth he’ll keep digging until he finds out.

Just as Elizabeth is reeling from this, Lucas approaches her and asks her why she didn’t tell him about his father leaving his mother. Elizabeth tries to say that she was told that in confidence and couldn’t/didn’t feel comfortable breaking it. She then says, “This isn’t my fault” and Lucas kind of just walks off annoyed/frustrated.

Scene 21: No-Work Advice

Clara comes into the barber shop asking Fiona for advice. Jesse asked for the day off to ride the motorcycle to Albert Falls (even though she asked him not to buy it). Fiona’s like “Uhhh...”

Then Faith walks in upset and says to Fiona, “Maybe you can help!” She goes on to say it’s like she’s back in Chicago being ignored like all the other interns!! And Fiona’s like, “Uhhhh...”

Faith realizes Clara is there and apologizes for interrupting. She asks Clara what’s wrong and Clara tells her about Jesse. Faith is like, OHhhhh My GOoDnESS I feel the SAMe wAY about the way Carson is treating mE!!!

And Clara says, “I have some chocolate cake at the cafe.”

And aWAY THEY GO.

Leaving Fiona cakeless (unless she’s gettin’ some of Mike Hickam later; that man is CAKED UP).

Scene 22:

Lee sadly contemplates his broken chair.

And then has a midlife crisis.

The chair reminded him of a chair he built with his grandfather, and he’s getting older and thinking about how he can’t do any of that stuff himself, and he doesn’t remember how to build things anymore. “I don’t make anything, Rosie.”

Scene 23: Judge Avery’s Office

Bill walks into his office to see that Andrew Hargraves has let himself in while he was out. Andrew asks Bill if the Mounties can use the judge’s office for the inquiry.

Bill says that, given they have a history, could he maybe tell him what’s going on? The inquiry isn’t adding up.

He goes on to say he was close by and that he stated on the record what happened that day, as well as the fact that everything regarding that event was done by the book.

Andrew says, “A Mountie died. I think that warrants a review.”

Bill says he noticed that Nathan and Andrew aren’t close and Andrew says the same thing Nathan did earlier: that they’ve “crossed paths.”

Andrew says he wouldn’t have achieved his rank if not for Bill; he also says that Bill was a good mentor. (I would argue this means that Bill taught him at the Academy like he did Jack and many others.)

And he suggests that Bill with see that his council wasn’t wasted. Bill replies back, “What appears to be holding a grudge.”

I mean, it’s not as if Bill didn’t have grudges (COUGH HENRY COUGH COUGH) but he never let those impact his work overmuch and he always did the right thing when the truth was uncovered. That’s one thing I have always enjoyed about Bill’s character. He’s suspicious of like, basically everyone but when someone he has reason to actively dislike (Henry Gowen) is innocent he’s the first person to insist the right thing be done.

Andrew doesn’t respond to that; he simply asks if the Mounties can count on use of Bill’s office and Bill agrees. Andrew then tells Bill that he’ll be called on as a witness.

Scene 24: Heart to Heart

Helen comes to Elizabeth’s house to visit and almost sits on a block (#parentlyfe).

She notices Jack playing with a little Mountie and a horse and asks about it. Elizabeth says a friend made that for Jack.

“Hm. A Mountie. Constable Grant?”

“A Mountie. My late husband.”

They’re clearly talking about the figure and not who made it, here. I’m not sure who the friend would be in this case, but it could be literally anyone in town.

Helen admits to Elizabeth that the most difficult thing she’s ever done in life is try to be a mother. She “never discovered what seems to come so naturally to others” (in particular Elizabeth)—the joy of it.

Elizabeth admits that sometimes she can’t recognize the joy in anything, but in moments like that she surrounds herself by people who love her. She asks why Helen has come, and Helen says she regrets having put Elizabeth in a position where she had to keep a secret from Lucas.

Elizabeth thanks her for her honest and Helen admits tearfully she should have said it earlier, in a more forthright manner, but that she doesn’t really know how to be any other way than how she is.

Elizabeth comes to sit with her on the couch and says that it’s understandable to be afraid because being yourself can make you vulnerable. She tells Helen that she is thoughtful and intelligent and asks if she shows that side of herself to her husband. Helen admits she hasn’t for a long time.

Elizabeth tells her that if her husband doesn’t love her for exactly who she is, then it isn’t love and he doesn’t deserve her...but if she’s not sure if they’ve shown each other their true hearts (i.e., their true selves) then it might be worth considering trying again.

She suggests Helen reach out first. Jack plops on Helen a bit, Helen hugs him, and Helen thanks Elizabeth for being her friend.

This isn’t a bad scene by any means, but I think I liked it better on a second watching. Still, the dialogue was a bit stiff and hard to follow. I really think it should have been put past someone specifically to see how easy it was to understand/if it hit the correct emotional beats. Rewatching it slowly and making sense of the complicated wording is what made it better. I’m not sure if I was the only one who thought that, though...

Scene 25: Faith vs. Carson

Faith approaches Carson and tells him they need to talk. She tries to insist that Molly stay because they all work together...but when Faith says that Carson ordered her to wrap Ned’s ankle without listening to what she had to say about it, Carson tells Molly to leave.

Faith expresses her concerns and he says she’s reading too much into it.

He says he wants to hear about it and then doesn’t want to actually hear about it because he is treating her exactly the same way she was being treated there. I think they’re being pretty lighthearted about that, too; you know she got talked over and overlooked over the male students for sure.

Carson tells her that he doesn’t know what she went through but that they aren’t in any shape to discuss it right now.

She just wants to make an effort, they need to get through this, but he claims he doesn’t know what “this” is and wants to know what she wants.

“You say that you value me as a doctor. You say that I’m gifted. But I don’t just want to hear it. I want to be treated like you mean it.”

Honestly this entire scene I just wanted them to break up. I make no secret of how I feel about them as a couple and this scene, this season’s drama for them, is maybe going to resolve my biggest annoyance about Faith and Carson as a couple. She was SO good on the show, you guys, and then he came on and as soon as he picked up the role of doctor again he completely outdid her at everything and overshadowed her character to the point where she may as well not have even been there.

He’s never seemed to be as into her as he seemed to be into the idea of her. I never got the impression that he viewed her as an equal. I’m pretty interested to see where they go with things this season; I have a feeling it could actually be really good.

Scene 26: Lee’s Workshop

Lee comes home and finds Rosemary in the backyard setting up a little workshop space for him.

He confesses that he doesn’t remember how to build anything and she encourages him fully. This scene was really good. It’s sappy and silly but it’s super cute and fun. I always do enjoy these two. I hope they get other good things this season. They deserve it.

Scene 27: Axes

Nathan and Bill are talking about the inquiry and Nathan says maybe he is responsible for the Mountie’s death. Bill insists that is not the case.

Nathan continues on to say maybe he should have listened to the demand and let the prisoner go.

Bill cautions him against talking in hindsight and asks if he’s sure Hargraves doesn’t have an axe to grind with him. Nathan says “Yeah” but doesn’t look at Bill when he says it, so of course Bill knows it’s not the truth.

Scene 28: Helen’s Goodbye & The Cruel Reality

Helen leaves on the stage with hardly a goodbye, and Elizabeth runs over to ask about it. Lucas tells her that she was determined to catch the last stage (probably for the week or month) and tells her that she’ll be in touch about the manuscript soon.

Lucas is a little uncharacteristically emotional and Elizabeth tries to stop him from leaving in a hurry. He tells her that what upset him about the whole thing isn’t just that she didn’t tell him the truth, but that he thought his parents loved one another.

Elizabeth says maybe they did love each other, though. Maybe they still do.

And Lucas replies with, “How do you lose that?”

Elizabeth says that she can only tell him what she told his mother: love has to be fought for.

“What would you know about it?” he asks.

Elizabeth stares at him a moment and can only say, “...That was cruel.”

Lucas walks away, and we see Nathan on the other side of the street.

Elizabeth doesn’t go to either of them.

And that’s the end of the episode.

Something I think needs to be mentioned is...the audacity of the writing this season. It feels bolder. Definitely better. The writers are taking their time and writing things that feel...mostly interesting or relateable. I never expected Lucas’s parents’ splitting up to be such a big deal to Lucas but adding that touch in there is just SO good. It makes me want to go back and watch the “date” scene where he explained how long it took his father to convince his mother to marry him. Any kind of story can be told in a way that it might sound romantic, or funny, or silly...when that isn’t the reality.

It’s actually a bit of clever storytelling to take Romantic Lucas and turn the idea almost upside-down. Whether his parents were actually in love or not doesn’t matter (yet); he feels that something he believed in his whole life, something he’s wanted his whole life for himself...isn’t even real. Worse, I think, he had that long conversation with Elizabeth about his parents and how lovely things were there, and...she finds out first that it might have just been...something he made of the situation.

And then... Elizabeth tells Lucas that love needs to be fought for. First of all, she told Helen it needed TO BE NURTURED and an a language nerd I’m a little annoyed that she used a different word with Lucas because...they aren’t the same thing. Nurturing is a tender sort of care, encouragement, growth. Fighting for love is a different beast.

But I still appreciated Lucas’s cool, irritated (frustrated?) response back. “What do you know about it?”

It’s a fair question. Who is she to give advice like that to Helen? I mean, objectively it’s good advice, but she hasn’t lifted a finger to fight for Lucas OR Nathan, and both men know it. She hasn’t worked to nurture her relationship with either of them.

The only thing cruel about his response is the time and place of saying it, but like...it’s honest.

If she doesn’t love either man, she needs to say so. She needs to be honest. If she loves Lucas she needs to tell him. She needs to reach out first. If she loves Nathan she needs to tell him. She needs to reach out.

She’s making both of these men do all the work. They both have to be the ones to reach out. Over and over and over while she does the bare minimum to encourage them enough to keep trying.

And the thing is, they’ve both been incredibly patient, certainly due to her situation. But their patience means she needs to be the one to reach out.

And she hasn’t. She won’t.

Fight for love? Nurture love? Please. What do you know about it, Elizabeth?

I’m really curious to see where they’re going to go with this. I hope they give Elizabeth and someone else a good talk about it. Maybe Clara would be a good choice... Or she could ask Rosemary for her HONEST opinion so that Rosie can give it.

Very much looking forward to the next episode!

#when calls the heart #season 8 shenanigans #season 8 spoilers #character studies and information #analysis and meta discussion

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quietlysatan · 5 years

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An Invincible Summer - ShanaStoryteller, AO3

Link: Here!!

Rating: T for read the warnings, but don’t worry too much because of them

Favorite Quote(s): I legit wanna tattoo this next quote on me somewhere

"Oh, the things that can be accomplished through ignorance of their impossibility,"

And this Straight Up Fact

“There’s no such thing as cheating as long as you win,” Natsu says, and the brat’s not wrong.

This one’s just funny

“Chouza,” Inoichi forces himself to say evenly, “Your teachings produced Ebisu and goddamned Gai.”

“Genma’s pretty normal though,” Chouza sighs, “I never could get through to that boy.”

Gently Gai casually caring about Kakashi’s well-being is my entire reason for living, speaking of which if someone wants to come be my Gai that’d be really fucking nice because us Kakashi’s don’t do too well on our own

He hesitates, but says, "Not that I do not find your newfound mentorship to be a most youthful endeavor, but -"

"I don't know," Kakashi interrupts his friend, "I met her while she was taking her genin exam and she, I don't know, adopted me or something. She just keeps showing up."

Gai nods thoughtfully, "Stubbornness is a useful skill to have when trying to cultivate a friendship with you." Kakashi elbows the other man, but doesn't protest besides that. "She's a good cook."

And this one because I love it when people Get It, ya’know?

That's really why he won't say anything, why he won't reveal that the Kyuubi's container and the fourth Hokage's child is still alive: they already killed him once. Naruto and Shikamaru are the same age, they would have been in the same class, and the idea that anyone could want to harm his innocent, precious son makes his blood boil

And this one, for accuracy

"This sounds like a most youthful endeavor. I will bring Anko! She will fan the flames of youth in our young Konoha blossom!"

Both Itachi and Kakashi look at Gai, horrified. "Please don't," Itachi says weakly, like he knows it'll fall on deaf ears but he has to try anyway.

"Don't worry," Gai attempts to assure them, going into his Good Guy pose, "They will produce youthful flames of feminine excellence!"

"They're going to burn down Konoha," Kakashi says flatly.

Gai's hair and teeth sparkle in the sunlight, and he doesn't attempt to deny it.

Another important one

"The world is a terrible place," she says, and she has to swallow before she speaks again, "and it's full of terrible people. But I don't have to be one of them."

I love that Natsu-chan has great balance, this is my number one favorite character trope, and I wish more people would write it

She bends down to look at him upside down, and Itachi can feel that she's not using chakra to stick onto him, and sometimes her balance just isn't logical.

I just love the idea of tiny genius Naruto, and I love that Natsu-chan is a seal master at like, fucking seven and a half lol

Itachi knows it's actually far more complicated than that, but just as he does not tell her minutia of the past shinobi wars in their history lessons, she does not overcomplicate her explanations of sealing. Usually he's grateful for that, but when she appears to break every known law to sealing and chakra, he's not.

"That's," he blinks and he's not going to tell her it's impossible because it clearly isn't, "new," he settles on.

A mood honestly

Inoichi now feels the urge to bang his head against the table top, because 'a huge pain' to Natsu is 'literally impossible' to everyone else.

Another mood honestly

Inoichi watches his former genin dig in with resignation. “When are you guys going to start picking up the tab? Feeding you all isn’t cheap you know.”

Hana swallows her mouthful, “Sensei, I am but a lone healer’s apprentice –“

“I have been a chunin less than a month,” Kabuto pouts, wounded, “and already you seek to profit-“

“Do you have any idea how much sealing paper and ink costs?” Natsu demands.

“Okay, okay,” Inoichi grumbles, but it’s not very effective considering he’s smiling, “I take it back, jeez.”

Okay so, since this is a 100k+ word fic, I’ve been doing this thing lately literally just now on this fic review where I only feature quotes from the first chapter (Depending on length.) but, I’m making an exception because I’ve never seen these three characters and my thoughts on them summed up so well by someone I don’t know which is to say anyone, no one I know cares about my interests really lol

"Maybe a little," he admits grudgingly, "Sakura's really smart, but she acts dumb for some reason. And her endurance is really bad. She probably would have been failed on that alone if she didn't have such good aim with shuriken. And Sasuke's good at like, everything, I still don't get why he didn't graduate earlier. He's just so-" Kiba rubs his hand over his face.

"So what?" Hana prompts, even though she's heard this particular complaint before.

"Sad," the genin sighs, "He's miserable all the time, and he works hard and if you yell at him for long enough he'll work with you, but - crap, I don't know. He's got this really great poker face so you think he's just a big jerk, but I can smell his emotions, the big idiot, and he's just this sad lonely kid who won't listen to anyone."

Hana hums, because if she opens her mouth she'll probably start cursing the Hokage and his dumb rules and his dumb ideas, and that is not the type of thing that leads to a long life.

Just one last quote because dudes, guys, pals, friends of mine it’s important and you should all stop and read it.

“Thanks for being cool with – everything. I’m really happy you’re not mad at me for not being honest with you.”

“You are my friend,” Gaara says warmly, “and you have always been honest about that.”

Words & Chapter(s): 136,306 words of greatness, and 6 full chapters of nicely done completion

Summary: When Naruto is five, he's gutted by a drunken civilian and presumed dead.

Six months later a girl with ash pale hair and dark blue eyes enters the Academy.

(Guys I swear on my cool as fuck username, and all around internet personality as practically satan and probably Lucifer and whatnot that nobody we like stays dead or severely injured)

Score: 13, this is one of my favorites for a reason, this is actually my second technically third time rereading this in as many weeks

Pairing(s): Uchiha Sasuke/Uzumaki Naruto Hatake Kakashi/Umino Iruka, background Haku/Zabuza, but don’t worry anything you’re thinking of is addressed quite nicely in the fic ultra background but still there’s a lot of relationships and I’m not going to tag them all

Warning(s): Naruto technically dies more than once because this is Naruto we’re talking about but they also technically don’t??? You gotta read it, but basically temporary character death, only the bad guys stay dead in this one.

Nobody knows that Naru-chan lived so there’s that angst for you, however, to be fair it’s not like this whole story is just characters mourning and crying and whatnot, at this point it’s mostly just passing thoughts and memories which, again, to be fair, does almost feel worse at times... Huh, regardless it’s not overly angsty

Kakashi is adopted whether he likes it or not by Natsu-chan, we love both of our emotionally fucked over fair-haired ninja in this house so you won’t have to worry about that sorta fic coming outta nowhere from me BTW... but anyways, Kakashi freaks out a bit, much like the abused dog he always reminds me of, but Natsu is the sweetest and most gentle, yet forceful person he could’ve possibly caught the attention of. (This is canon)

The Akatsuki are still bad, BUT ITACHI ISN’T technically SO WHO FUCKING CARES!!!! (The Massacre still happens tho...)

Mentions of The Flower District and what that implies, and also things a Kunoichi might definitely do

Oh my fucking god the Hyuga... Who would willingly do something so horrible as that? Of all the things... Warning for... The Hyuga branch family situation, it’s dealt with nearly as soon as we are informed but, gods, my blood ran cold, and my face whited out, my sister thought someone had died when she saw my face haha,,, who the fuck does this? And do they die? In canon I mean? I think I only watched up to the chunin exams or Pein’s attack, I can’t remember which tho...

Natsu cries because people are nice to her sometimes. And honestly that’s fair, I burst into to tears once because I imagined someone kissing my forehead softly so, Natsu is completely valid... Sidenote, I’m touch-starved and have no cure for this beyond younger siblings and my cat because I don’t have the ability to ask my mom for a hug without literally gross sobbing and I have A Thing about embarrassment sooooo... yeah if anyone has some therapy justu for me that’d be nice

Mentions of Gross Men that apparently want to have Natsu’s increasingly growing collection of the absolute most dangerous people she can befriend pay them a visit. And by that, I mean an old fuckwit has the gall to leer at a TEN-YEAR-OLD and a FUCKING THIRTEEN-YEAR-OLD!!!!!! Ugh, I hate those kinds of pathetic worms.

On that note, there is technically underaged things going on, but they are also Ninja soooo???? They’ve killed people and are technically in their version of an army, and by the laws of their lands they’re all adults, actually I’m pretty sure by shinobi life expectancy Kakashi is middle-aged, Inoichi is a senior citizen, and Hiruzen is a walking corpse tbh

Alcoholism??? I don’t really think it is but I’m not sure, but some characters do drink often, and usually when stressed courtesy of Natsu and co. but still... I don’t actually know if it is because it doesn’t actually happen much, more like every few weeks/months

Mentions of past sexual assault, and attempted past sexual assault, neither happen in fic or to any of our main characters, the experiences are not graphic though they do talk about it in chapter five, it’s not to graphically described.

Also, a bunch of off-screen lemon

A Thing (That I copy-pasted from the author so that all of you will see it and not say a single word against it.): If you thought Natsu was too mature for her age - she has seen and been through some really horrible shit. But also: my cousin has, since he was like 4, hung out with kids that were about 4 years older than him because those were the kids that were in his neighborhood or whatever. Point being, even after he started school, his main group of friends was consistently older than him. He very quickly adapted to that, and to this day (he's 12) hangs out with that same group, and considers children his own age 'kids' because he adapted to the behavior of the group he was surrounded with. I hardly believe Natsu would be any different.

And also

4. Quick little note because some people mentioned liking my portrayal of the Sandaime. I base his decisions/motivations (and Itachi and Danzo's to a certain extent) around this quote by Clementine von Radics: "It is so hard to live half monster, to hurt everything you love by trying to protect it wrong."

Pros: Watching Natsu just casually disregard the idea of gender with little to no thought is the greatest thing anyone will ever experience beyond, I dunno, the party we’re all gonna collectively throw when soggy Cheeto dies (I still haven’t decided which song we should make chart number one when that happens)

Given that I’ve technically read this three times you should already know the writing is fucking amazing, like, whoa, mind blown type of amazing, like, wow, so good, I usually hate rereading something I’ve read before, and especially so soon after the fact but geez Louis is this fic amazing

Natsu is just as easy to fall in love with as Naruto, and they are still the same people with slightly different personalities as is to be realistically expected with a situation like Naru’s was.

Also, GENDERFLUID REPRESENTATION DONE FUCKING AMAZINGLY IS ALWAYS A PLUS!!!!!!!

The author manages to convey a very realistic genderfluid character in an incredibly believable manner, while also still keeping Natsu/Naruto themself. They’re still the Naruto that we knew and loved, but they’re different too, as is to be expected. when Natsu is a girl no-one stumbles, she is a girl without a doubt, even the author doesn’t trip up on societal expectations, and when Naruto is a boy there is next to immediate acceptance of this fact with absolutely zero (0) Zero bullshit from transphobes, which, as a genderfluid person myself, is always fucking nice to see. You’ll have to read it to know more though.

Natsu running around creating seals is honestly the greatest thing ever, and the end scene with the village made me cry a lil bit, and dammit this fic is so fucking good!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, there’s a scene, where Natsu heals Kakashi, and the way the author handled explaining the intimate not sexual relationship between two of my favorite characters ever is just, so subtly beautiful, the sibling-bond these two have is beautiful, and a part of me wants to cry sometimes when I read it, and usually do cry a little when I get to this scene, and only partially because of what happened directly before it.

I love the way everybody just gets up and moves past their trauma and just decides to politely ignore it, oh they still have it, they still deal with it, but they care, and they are careful about it, and even though it hurts them like a knife-wound to the kidney in slow-motion they still get back up and keep fucking going. That’s hella admirable and I can respect that, I can respect even more that they slowly but surely let themselves heal as time moves on. This fic is beautiful on so many different levels but it is this one perhaps, that is the most magnificent. Perhaps.

Sasuke is adorable and depressing and adorable and I love it. And Ino is still a bad bitch but she’s a kid so we only see it like a handful of times in the first two chapters. The Akimichi/Yamanaka/Nara are all great, and I occasionally pity Inionchicause like, he’s putting up with a well-informed seal genius that’s still hyper, a slightly frightening medic-kunoichi with giant dogs, another slightly more frightening medic-nin who isn’t the greatest fighter but damn can he be intimidating and also really good at pointing out “Certain Things” while judging you about them which, honestly, is my greatest pastime. Itachi is so sweet and then so tragic oh my gods, and Natsu never even considers giving up on him. Kakashi is so sweet, and he slowly becomes less of a beaten dog as time goes on and I just love all of these characters.

Except for Hiruzen. Well, no, I still love this particular incarnation of Hiruzen, for all that he’s got one hell of a pathetically small backbone, I get why he does shit. But that doesn’t make me happy. Still, he’s better than dumbledouchebag. Granted that’s not difficult, and you might have to actively put an effort in to be as bad as that guy, but still. Plus, his hearts in the right place, and he’s less about the greater good then... certain disgraces to teaching and being in charge of a large group of people... Hiruzen is actually kinda sweet and admits he has issues and actually has an excuse that’s understandable for the shit that he pulls which is great, if sadly uncommon.

Anyways, Sakura is terrifying, and I remembered why I had a crush on her. She’s so badass, also, she ends up Princess Mononoke basically which, honestly, is fucking great, and the best thing we could’ve asked for, I love all of these characters so much!!!

Aesthetic: It reminds me off beefy stew (We don’t eat beef, so we used vegan soy beef stuff instead, and it was just as good.) it reminds me of the warmth, and friendship, and home that I felt after my mom and I make dinner together with nothing but a little music on and jokes passing back and forth between us. It reminds me of scraping my knee and having my friends help me to their mom, it reminds me of loyalty and compassion. It reminds me of dancing outside at night, alone in the forest with nothing but the moon for company and wind for music. It reminds me of the first time I realized that I could love someone despite their gender and that I should despite mine. It reminds me of finely spun handmade lace, and all it’s delicate while also reminding me of the sturdiest of steels, it reminds me of so much. It reminds me of acceptance, and understanding, and so much more. If I were to say what food and drink it reminds me of, I’d say chicken noodle soup, and sweet lavender-lemon tea.

Music Aesthetic: So, I made a playlist while I was reading this the first time around, and instead of a gif or twenty like I would usually prefer to do I’m going to add that playlist. https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLbhXmTSBbAyjk0m1b4BZUp3t0RHL83LDK

But if I were to add a gif or two it’d be these

Because something about this fic reminds me of rainy days with tea and baggy clothes.

Every time Natsu/Naruto decided to fight ever, to be honest.

#sasunaru #naruto x sasuke #Sasuke x Naruto #Satan has great taste in: SasuNaru #kakairu #Satan has great taste in: KakaIru #long fic #Long Read #over 100k #Naruto #It's another Naruto one #sasuke #fem!naruto #sorta #genderfluid!naruto #give it a chance #trust me #fic rec

331 notes · View notes

navalcriminalimagines · 5 years

Text

Comfort zone - 3

Author's note: I'm amazed by all the great comments I'm receiving for these series!!! It means a lot to me, I'm so happy you guys are loving it! ♥️♥️♥️

For those who don't know, English isn't my mother language (I'm french), so I apologize for the possible mistakes, and how it must not be grammatically correct!

Tag list (if you want to be tag, just let me know!): @madpanda75 @zombz78 @zoeykaytesmom @mommakat32 @hannahlouise98 @imaginecrushes @cold-blooded-girls

Liv asked why you wanted to change partners. Obviously, you couldn't tell her how you feel about Sonny and how things were getting really complicated between the two of you. "Carisi is almost as new as I am, I think I could learn much more with Fin. No offense to my partner, he is great,"

Your boss probably pretended to buy your excuse but she agreed anyway. She noticed how you changed for the past two months, you looked sad and always exhausted. "Do you need vacations, y/n?" She gently asked. You already thought about it before but you came to the conclusion it would make things worst.

"No, I'm fine Liv," you lied. She told you to leave for the night and that she would make the changes tomorrow. Before going back to your desk, you stopped by your locker to take your training clothes. You quickly waved the team goodbye and left for the gym.

"What is wrong with her, lately?" Amanda asked to her co-workers but mainly Carisi. He had to be the one that knows more about it.

"You should ask Barba," Sonny simply answered, nervously typing on his keyboard. Amanda gave a questioning look to Fin but the older detective just raised his shoulder.

"Do we miss something?"

It was like Sonny didn't hear Amanda's last question. He turned off his laptop and left the precinct. His girlfriend has been texted him all day to remind him about their meeting with her best friends. He definitely didn't want to go. He didn't want to meet her friends. Mandy is a very nice girl and she likes Sonny very much, but he isn't in love with her. He likes her, of course. Even though he doesn't want to admit it, he hoped he could forget you in her arms. But there's not a single second where he doesn't think about you. When she kissed him, he wonders what your lips would taste like. When she hugged him, he only thinks about your hugs. He can smell you through her. He hears your voice when she talks.

But you have Jeff. At least, you had him. You already told Sonny you were dating Jeff forever. He could never forget the time you told that Jeff is your one and only. He always dreamt about that kind of love. Love that was meant to be. When he started to feel something for you, he hated himself. He is Catholic, faithful is important to him too. He promised himself he would never go after someone already taken. And he didn't. He managed to go over his feelings for you until two months ago when you changed. And it seems clear to him that you have - or had - an affair with Barba. A part of him feels disappointing in you. He believed you when you said you could never cheat on Jeff or anyone else.

"Sonny, baby!" Mandy greeted him with a kiss. She introduced him to her two best friends, Sonja and Jenna. He ordered a scotch, he needed something strong to go through this night. He barely talked. He wasn't really there but thankfully the girls didn't seem to notice. After his third glass of scotch and thinking about Barba before every sip, "I'm drinking this because of that idiot," he repeated to himself, Mandy forced to come on the dancefloor. He reluctantly agreed, after she complained. He was uncomfortable. This is not where he should be. They are not the people he should be with.

Sonny excused himself to Mandy and walked to the bathroom. But a laugh stopped him in his course. That laugh, your laugh. He is dying to hear it since two months and he hears it now. In the middle of a bar. Thanks to his size, he looked around to see where you were. Somehow, he hoped you were not there with Rafael but with a friend or even Jeff. He fell hard when he saw Rafael tugging your hair behind your ear, with a flirty look on his face. Rafael was the first to see him. He smiled. That asshole smiled. Sonny felt jealousy burning inside of him. When his blue eyes met yours, his face dropped in disbelief. You were about to stand up and say something but Mandy, obviously drunk, arrived and hugged Sonny from behind. The only thing you saw was her hands on his chest and how he softly took them in his own hands. He ignored you and turned around to face his girlfriend.

"Wanna go or wanna play?" Rafael whispered in your ear.

"Love is not a game to me. I'm going to take off, if you don't mind," you put your leather coat on and stood up to leave. Rafael told you to wait outside while he paid the bill. You didn't take one last look at Sonny and his girl, you just rushed out of the bar. You waited for Rafael for what seems like forever. Of course, the ADA couldn't let things like this. He appreciated you the moment you joined SVU, while he took him almost two years to tolerate the Fordham Law student. The squad started to feel like family to him. At some points, he hated it but it also felt good to have friends.

"Detective," he greeted Sonny with a smirk like only Rafael had. The detective rolled his eyes while Mandy decided to speak.

"Hi! I'm Mandy, Sonny's girlfriend," she offered her hand to Rafael and he shook it.

"Nice to meet you, Mandy," he smiled, "Do you mind if I steal your man for a second?"

She seemed to think for a moment, "How about you join us? My friends are waiting for Sonny and I. They are going to think to lock ourselves in the bathroom," she laughed and winked at Sonny.

"Lovely," Rafael sighed, "Not to be annoying but it's important," he looked at Sonny right in his eyes, only him could make Mandy go.

"I'm sure it can wait," Sonny said.

"Okay, fine. Just so you know, Carisi, your partner and you really need to talk about a case. I mean, talking can avoid misunderstandings. It would be a disaster to lose that case over a mistrial,"

Rafael joined you, hoping that his message was clear enough for Sonny. Once you found yourself alone in your apartment, you took a shower and you realized your hands inflated since your training session earlier. You really strive on the punching bag, giving up all your frustrations. You looked at your engagement ring and tried to take it off but it was stuck on your finger. You were thinking about taking it off and gave it back to Jeff for weeks now. But it seems like it would definitely marked the end of your relationship with him. Plus, people would notice and start questioning about. You were not ready to answer those questions. You wanted and needed more time to avoid the reality.

[From Rafael] : If you need anything, call me. Buenas noches, guapa.

[To Rafael] : I can't thank you enough for everything, Rafa. I'm lucky to have you, good night.

[From Rafael] : I wanna go to Cuba this winter. It's just an idea.

[To Rafael] : Haha, okay. When I'll be the boss, I'll take you to Havana.

[From Rafael] : Already counting days. :)

You smiled at his cuteness, trying to use the smiley face. You confessed Rafael what your ultimate goal was; being a Captain and running your own precinct. Of course it was a long and complicated road, but you promised it to your dad. That was his dream. But instead and due to your mother's wants, he became the CEO of sells firm. He hated it. He hated to wear a suit everyday, to make difficult decisions, to ruin someone's life if he had to fire them. "No matter what Jeff or anyone else wants you to do, just don't listen to them. Follow your heart and your dreams. Not someone else's." he told you multiple times. And you did. At first, you wanted to join the Navy but due to medical issues you had when you were a kid, you couldn't. So, you entered the police academy. And here you were. SVU Detective. For now.

Wrapped under a blanket, watching Friends all over again for the billion times, you got distracted by someone knocking at your door. The first person you thought about was Jeff. But the man that was behind the door was a bit taller, with shorter hair and thinner. "Can I come in?" Sonny softly asked. He looked exhausted and a bit drunk. He nearly tripped one of your shoes but you caught him. You helped him to sit on your couch and went to the kitchen to get some water. "Will you ever stop watching this?" he sighed.

"When I'll be dead,"

"How I Met Your Mother is much better," he provoked.

"Yeah? Star Trek sucks," you provoked back, and he looked offended.

"Spock will hunt you down forever," he warned you, mimicked Spock's ears and you laughed. You missed him so bad. You missed your partner, your friend.

"Why are you here, Sonny?" you asked after a silence.

"Rafael said we needed to talk so let's talk," his eyes finally met yours for the first time he got into your apartment, "Jeff doesn't live here anymore, does he?"

You sighed and looked at one of the walls to avoid his gaze, "He- left two months ago,"

"Why?" you looked at Sonny and chuckled. Was it the time where you tell how you feel?

"Because he is a very wise man," you only answered.

"Or because you slept with Barba maybe? I mean- I'd break up with my fiancée too for this reason," "Rafael Barba. How offensive is that?" He acted like he was disgusted. This time, you couldn't help but laugh. Sonny really thinks you have an affair with Rafael. "This is not funny, y/n!" he raised his voice, "You told me how you couldn't stand people that cheats on their lover. You told me you believed in faithful and I believed you,"

"Oh my God, Sonny." It was your turn to raise your voice, "I did not cheat on you as far as I know,"

"Kind of," his mouth spoke too fast.

Sonny has never been able to keep his mouth shut, which put him in embarrassing or dangerous situation, multiple times. And a-little-drunk Sonny was worst. He realized what he said but it was too late, you heard it. You sarcastically laughed at what he said. He seems so serious. Why was he feeling like this?

"I didn't know we were dating," you said, "Were we having a menage a trois with Jeff?" Sonny stayed silent. He had no idea how to explain this. One thing was sure, you did not deny having sex with Barba. He felt sick. Literally. Everything happened really fast; you saw your partner bring his hand to his mouth and disappeared in one second. You followed him to the bathroom where you heard him throwing up in the toilets. But he took the time to lock the door. You softly knocked and asked him to let you in. After a long moment, the door finally opened. Sonny was barely standing on his long legs, and he looked miserable, "do you have a extra toothbrush?" He whispered, his head against the door frame. You got in, took a new toothbrush and put some toothpaste in it. Sonny was nearly falling asleep brushing his teeth.

"How many drinks did you have, Sonny?"

"I stopped counting after you left with Barba, but I had three before that," you shook your head. Sonny drinks a little but since you know him, you never saw drunk until tonight.

"Jeff must have left some clothes, wash your mouth and come get change,"

Of course, you helped him undressed. His chest was more muscular than it seemed to under his suits. His skin felt so soft under your fingers, but his smell wasn't the same. His cologne was probably mixed with his girlfriend's. The poor thing was exhausted, he was sitting on the edge of the bed, as you tried to dress him with an old tee shirt, but his face hit your chest and you heard him heavily breathing. You gave up on dressing him, you simply lay him under the covers in just his boxers.

How were you supposed to fall asleep with the man you love almost naked in your bed?

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haikyuu-imagines-and-others · 5 years

Note

I really loved the "Single Dad Kuroo Au" so I wonderd if I could request a third part :3 as long as you have ideas for it of course

Haha…. Yall know me…. If I don’t have an idea, I just make one up as I go ;D lol I’m so glad you guys like this little 3 parter! I honestly didn’t think it’d be this big of a hit!!! Thanks for the request! - Admin Satori

Part 1 here Part 2 here

Kuroo Tetsurou:

Souma (Real/Genuine) - Son (6) “So… are you guys dating?”

Startled at the question, you turned to your co-worker with wide eyes, “U-uh w-what?” Not that they didn’t know what was going on; They’d been your first friend when you’d started working at the school! “I-i… uh….” You felt confusion color your expression in a warm heat, “Who?”

But they simply rolled their eyes with a smile, “The alley cat.” A raised eyebrow, and yet you still looked confused, “The smart kids dad.”

Your mouth opened into a small ‘o’ as you realized who they were referring to. “O-oh…. Uh… Kuroo-san…” He’d told you to call him by his first name a while ago…. But you’d simply save that for when he was around - there was no need for you to embarrass yourself further. “Of-of course not.” You laughed nervously, “Uhm… We’re just friends.”

They smiled knowingly, “Uh-huh… Friends who go over to each others homes for dinner pretty much every night…. That’s what friends do, right?” They raised their eyebrows in question, a teasing lilt to their voice.

“He’s a great cook…” You muttered guiltily. It wasn’t a lie. Every night you’d go over for dinner, after being invited the previous evening, and he’d make these… amazing dishes. Complex in flavor being both spicy and sweet or salty and smooth….

At this point, you were excited to see what he’d make for dinner each night - or what conversation Souma would spark up about his excelled class regime or what new chemical Kuroo was testing out in his labs….

Sato, your co-worker, simply hummed in thought, “You should pay him back, you know… It’s kind of mean for a girlfriend to not reciprocate that kind of affection~.”

“We aren’t dating!” You huffed out, feeling your cheeks heat even more at the mere thought. Of course, you wanted to be dating him. He’s cute. He’s funny. He’s got a good heart…. His son’s adorable…. But be it forbidden that you ever admit to having a crush on your former students father….

But the thought of dating Kuroo didn’t leave you. The rest of the day you were plagued with the fantasies of his holding you close, his lips against yours or pressing against your neck or forehead…. His hands gripping your hips or thighs…. His calling your name-“ _________-sensei!”

Flushed with shame and embarrassment, you responded to your student requesting your attention.

——

“So when are you gonna ask _______-sensei to live with us?”

Kuroo nearly choked on his sip of water, rushing to put the cup down before he was looking at his son with wide eyes, “W-what the-“ He stopped himself from continuing that question, trying his hardest to never swear in front of his boy.

But Souma didn’t seem fazed by his father’s surprise. In fact, he looked expectant for an immediate answer.

Live with them? How in the hell did Souma get to that conclusion? All that was happening was you having dinner with them… every… night…. oh..

He cleared his throat and rubbed the back of his neck a bit awkwardly, “Uh, buddy? I thought we talked about this? _______-sensei is just a friend of ours. Why would she be living with us?”

Souma pouted, “Well… Because they’re always here. Isn’t it mean to make someone travel distances they don’t need to travel?”

Distances… Meaning you going to work, going home to change, then coming all the way back out to their house for dinner before going all the way back to sleep for the next day to start…. It was a lot of back and forth, Kuroo knew… but an invitation wasn’t mandatory to accept. If you felt there was too much back and forth, or you felt uncomfortable with the amount of travel just for a free meal… you were more than welcome to reject the invitation.

It’d break his heart, but it was your choice to make.

Going a single day without seeing you would definitely be something he’d have to get used to if you decided to stop. It’d been about 3 months since you’d first come by for dinner. Every evening after that there you were eating dinner with him and his son… Acting as if you were part of the family already, something he found himself longing for.

Maybe it was because Souma really liked you…..

No. Kuroo wasn’t going to lie to himself. Souma liking you was just a plus, honestly… A priority, but a plus nonetheless……

He liked you. Really really liked you. The thought of you not coming around to eat dinner or visit for a single day made Kuroo’s heart ache.

Why? Was he alone in this feeling? Were you really just coming by to hang out with his son and get some free food? Was he just wasting his time preparing these extravagant meals that he’d had only a few minutes to read up on before making?

“Daddy!” Kuroo met his son’s disgruntled expression almost immediately, “Don’t ignore me.” He muttered, and Kuroo couldn’t help but laugh softly.

“I would NEVER.” A swear on his life. He grabbed his son in his arms, lifting him high above the ground and resting him on his shoulder, “Ahhhh, duck!” Souma immediately ducked as they entered the kitchen, just nearly missing hitting his head on the doorway - something Kuroo wouldn’t have let actually happen, but the playfully irritated look on his son’s face was worth it.

——

Tonight felt… different. You weren’t sure why, but it did. The air was charged excitedly, as if it were waiting for something to happen - to you or to someone else, that you couldn’t feel. But it lay in wait the entire rest of your day into your evening.

Nothing to wear! Nothing you wanted to wear anyway! Why was it so hard? Why were you putting in so much effort tonight? Why tonight specifically? Before, you’d simply wear a nice t-shirt and some jeans or pants… Your ‘off-duty’ teacher clothes!

But now? Why did you feel the need to pull down your favorite casual dress? Why did it feel right to slip it over your shoulders? Why was the struggle to zip up the back so satisfying to you??

Cute… You wanted to look cute. You wanted Kuroo to think you were cute…. Maybe it’d spark something… Maybe it’d start something… Probably not, but you wanted that possibility to be open to him.

And now there you stood, in front of his door, hands clasped in front of you nervously after ringing his doorbell. Sweaty palms? Not even! Try shaking hands. Cold feet. You were pretty sure your fingers were so cold they’d lost all feeling.

“Sensei!” Souma cheered happily as he opened the door, “I missed you all day today!” His words shot straight to your heart, and you smiled widely as you kneeled down and took him into your arms in a tight hug. “I have so much to tell you about school today! So much happened! And then daddy made this cool thing at work and it-“

“Oi! That’s my story, kid!” Kuroo poked his head around the front door, quickly looking away with a slight blush at the sight of you holding his son so close. Cute. “Dinner’s almost done!” As quickly as he’d come, he was back in the kitchen, hiding his embarrassing thoughts in the deep recesses of his brain while he struggled to focus on the meal he was making.

You smiled shyly, but quickly pushed away your thoughts of him as Souma continued to chatter in front of you, his hand taking yours and leading you inside the house.

Still a mess. You wondered if Kuroo ever actually cleaned or if he kind of just tossed things around until a path was made amongst the chaos. As embarrassed as he was about the mess every time you came over, he didn’t really seem to make an effort to clean it up after you’d made sure he knew it didn’t bother you.

It didn’t. Honest and true. Your apartment was a mess, less so than their house but a mess all the same.

——

Dinner came and went. Filled with shy sideways glances between you and Kuroo. You’d catch him staring as you talked to Souma… Or he’d catch you staring while he playfully bickered back and forth with his son. You’d never blushed for so long before, it was like every time he even spared you a single flicker of his golden eyes you felt like someone was holding a flame inches from your face. So warm. His gaze was so intense even when it was just the shadow of what he could actually stare at you with.

Oh, you wished he’d actually stare at you. Stare at you and not look away when you swallowed your nerves and met his gaze.

Maybe you were thinking too forward. He was a single dad of a young boy… No mother or father in sight… You didn’t know what had happened with them, but they’d left their child and Kuroo behind in their path…. Kuroo was a busy man, making sure they had enough money for their house and bills and Souma’s schooling and supplies….

Maybe you had to step up for him?

You’d helped with the dishes and cleaning up after dinner. Standing beside Kuroo at the sink with Souma on the other side of you. Kuroo would wash, you’d rinse, and Souma would dry and put them away.

Kuroo was so close to you. Closer than you’d ever had him before… Inches. You could feel his body heat on your left side, see every flex of his arms as he cleaned his plates and cooking utensils. What did it feel like to have his hands on you? Holding you close? Stroking through your hair or caressing your face? Did he have soft hands? You wondered how big his hand was compared to yours, his longer fingers could most definitely bend over your shorter ones.

This was getting out of control. You barely knew him-

No. You’d known him for a couple of months. You’d learned a lot about him. Not anything about Souma’s mother… but enough to know something had happened to them that had been an accident…. You weren’t close enough to learn that backstory yet, so what made you think you were close enough for him to be romantically interested in you?

Doubt surged in your chest. Maybe it was right. Maybe you were seeing what you wanted to see. Maybe he was just being nice because his son really liked having you around?

Uncomfortable. You felt like your cute casual dress was 30 pounds heavier on your shoulders and hips… Had you been fooling yourself this whole time?

Souma had walked with you to the door, “And tomorrow, daddy said we’re gonna make mochi! Sensei, I’m so excited! It’s gonna be cold in the house though… so I think you should bring a jacket… Just in case! Frost bite is scary!”

You smiled down at him, kneeling in front of him before you stepped out of the house, “I’m sure it’s going to be so much fun, Souma… We gotta make sure you don’t get sick though, okay? You’ve missed a lot of school this semester.”

He looked down with pink cheeks and tinted ears, surprised you’d heard about his absences, “Ah… you.. you heard about that…” He gave you a sheepish smile as he looked from under his lashes at you, “I was sick…”

But you only laughed softly and ‘booped’ his nose, “From all this ice cream your dad keeps feeding you!”

“Eh?” Kuroo rounded the corner, “I don’t force feed it to him or anything, if he doesn’t want it he doesn’t have to eat it!”

More laughter as you stood from your kneeling, not seeing Souma make his sneaky escape… leaving you and Kuroo just inside the house, “Expecting a child to not eat ice cream as an option isn’t very sound logic, Tetsurou.” His name slipped passed your lips so effortlessly, but still your stomach clenched in anticipation. Each time you’d said his name that night, you’d felt like your insides were fluttering excitedly… God you had it bad.

He scratched the back of his head with a dorky smile, the result of you calling him by his name yet again, “And I don’t think they’d put an illogical man in a chemist lab so… checkmate.” He stuck his tongue out at you.

You smiled softly, letting out an amused hum, “Well, you’ve got me there.” You pretended to wave a white flag of surrender, “Out brained once again.”

The mood settled as the two of you stood there. It would have been awkward… if it weren’t for that charged feeling you’d felt earlier in the day. It was comfortable for the most part… and for the other part it was anxiety inducing. What was going to happen? There were so many options presented before you for you to take - as the one taking action or even the one reacting to one….

But just before you were about to make your move - he spoke.

“I really appreciate you doing this, _________.” Your name rolled off his tongue so easily, it shot you straight in the heart… though this shot felt warm and had your heart racing excitedly. “I know it’s not easy, going back and forth all the time… but it really makes Souma happy to see you every day and be able to talk to you for hours on end.”

Deflated. Oh… This was about Souma. You should have known.

You didn’t let it faze you, though. You smiled warmly up at him, though you knew it didn’t reach your eyes, “Of course. He’s a very bright boy… He’s going to do amazing things when he’s older… I’m just lucky enough to have been an influencer in getting him closer to those dreams of his.” You owed Souma so much more than just those dreams… for meeting his father? You owed that child the entirety of existence.

But Kuroo wasn’t finished just yet. He stepped forward, now only a couple feet in front of you… You didn’t feel intimidated in the least. Your heart only kicking up speed in your chest as you tilted your head a bit better to be able to meet his golden eyes. He stared down at you intensely. No longer was he the awkward blushing dork you’d seen a few minutes ago. He’d been switched out with who he’d been before he’d become a father.

This was Kuroo.

He smiled down at you, and it wasn’t one you recognized.. This was mischievous… This smile had a secret behind it… and you wanted to find out what it was. “More than that though…. I’m happy when you’re around…” Forward. It felt like the air was knocked straight from your lungs at his confident confession. “I’d really like to have you around more often, if that’s okay with you…”

Heart hammering, you nodded slowly, “I… I’m more than okay with that…”

A quiet hum from him had the air between you two vibrating as he leaned down, “Are you okay with this?” His head tilted before his lips were just a hairs length from yours, his eyes hooded as he took in your reaction, committing your wide surprised eyes to memory. You wanted more, you wanted to be closer to him… You wanted to touch.

So you did. While he was busy giving you a ghost of a kiss, you’d rested your hands on his chest, fingers wrapping in his shirt to keep him close. He felt so warm under his shirt, you wanted to feel more, to hold him closer… Why were you longing for him so much? It was just a crush, right? …. Right?

“Daddy! Don’t forget to read me a bedtime story! It’s almost bedtime!”

Kuroo inhaled sharply as he stood up straight, away from your waiting lips. And while it was a disappointment of a buildup… you couldn’t ever be mad at little Souma… Kuroo looked over his shoulder at his son, who had simply popped his head around the corner. You much rather would have been kissing this man before you, but in this circumstance, you simply rested your forehead against his chest with giggles barely contained.

“Yeah, kiddo, I’ll be in there soon. Gimme a few minutes.” But the intense Kuroo was gone for now… Back into ‘dad’ mode, he guessed. His hands rested on your waist a bit awkwardly at first before he felt your giggles shaking your body. “Oh? What’s so funny?” He tilted his head a bit to be able to see the side of your face as you leaned your forehead against his chest still.

You pulled away with a wide smile, staring up at him with bright eyes, “I’m just…. relieved…” and you were. This whole time you’d been going back and forth with yourself on whether or not you were fooling yourself into thinking he was interested in you… and now? After that? You knew he was. And the feeling of being wanted by someone as amazing as him was… it made you giddy!

“Oh yeah?” He smirked down at you, leaning down once more as if he were going to kiss you this time, but he stopped short, “Well… Enjoy it while it lasts… Because our first kiss isn’t going to be mediocre….”

Then he pressed his lips to your forehead… which, honestly, was a pretty good second.

He walked you to your car, held and closed your door for you before leaning against the car door, “So… This Friday? You have any plans?”

If you did, you’d drop them all immediately for him. But you knew you didn’t have anything planned. Teacher life was kind of boring after the 12th drawing you had to ‘grade’… Thankfully, you, too, had a deadline for when your stuff had to be submitted. “Why?”

Kuroo smirked as he leaned against your car window, “I’d like to take you on a date…”

A/N: Oof! Definitely didn’t plan that ending but haha I liked it :D

#Admin Satori #Haikyuu!!#Haikyuu!! Scenario #Kuroo Tetsurou #Fluff #Domestic #Single Dad AU!#SingleDadAU #Souma OC

219 notes · View notes

strawberryjeonginnie · 5 years

Text

Instagram//Kim Seungmin

Genre: fluff

Additional: college au, instagrammer(?) seungmin, lowkey coffee shop au, gender-neutral reader, oneshot

Word Count: 2,147

Warnings: a lot of blushing and disgusting fluff

Summary: @ ksm_00 has followed you!

A/N: this fic was inspired by instagram by dean.

Kim Seungmin was quite possibly one of the most attractive boys you had ever laid eyes upon; your local college sweetheart who spent his free time in a quiet corner of a coffee shop with a book in hand and round glasses slowly slipping off his nose. Except, there was something that set him apart from all the other college sweethearts who spent their free time in a corner of a coffee shop — Seungmin was Instagram famous. Sure, Instagram famous does sound a little ridiculous, but he was popular for a good reason. He had the voice of an angel and posted short little covers of songs in between selfies and cute aesthetics. He had gained quite the fan base and even some admirers. You were one of them.

You weren’t typically the type to fawn over anyone, but you couldn’t help yourself. As soon as you laid eyes on his page back in your sophomore year of high school, you had been completely whipped. When you first saw him on your campus your freshman year at your university, you had to do a double take. It felt even weirder when you ended up having classes with him. Now, in your sophomore year in college, you still couldn’t get over seeing him in real life. It was like you were permanently star-struck. What made things worse? You worked at the cafe he frequented. Needless to say — sometimes you got a little distracted on the job.

“Excuse me–“ A shy voice snapped you out of your daze and you quickly turned your attention to the customer in front of you. To your horror, it was Kim Seungmin himself. Of course, he had to catch you spacing off.

“S-sorry! What could I get for you, sir?” You stuttered out, pink dusting your cheeks from embarrassment. “Could I just get a medium iced vanilla coffee?” he asked, fishing out a ten from his back pocket. “Of course! Your total is four fifty.”

He handed you the bill and you quickly made out change and handed it back to him. Smiling, he put it into the tip bucket and shyly looked back up at you before going to find a place to sit while he waited for his drink. Your heart fluttered and you smiled dreamily. Your coworker, Jisung, quirked his eyebrow at you, making you turn and start to make the coffee to hide your red face.

While scooping ice into the plastic cup, you suddenly felt a presence next to you. You jumped, looking up to see who it was. You let out a sigh of relief seeing that it was only Jisung — but you quickly became confused seeing the smug look on his face.

“What?” you questioned, only to be met with him wiggling his eyebrows at you. Suddenly understanding, you became defensive. “No,” you said sternly, turning back to what you were doing.

“Oh come on — it’s so obvious,” he whined. You shook your head. “Keep your voice down, he’ll hear us. Besides, I don’t like him like that,” you whispered, glancing over at Seungmin to make sure he didn’t hear. Thankfully, Seungmin was on his phone, most likely scrolling through Instagram. Jisung smiled wider, a mischievous glint in his eyes.

“I never said you do. You’re assuming that’s what I meant and that must mean you do like him,” he whispered back, making you groan and go back to making the drink. Finishing up, you turned around and pushed past Jisung. Sucking in a breath, you approached Seungmin.

“Here’s your drink, sir!” You smiled. Seungmin looked up from his phone and gave you one of his dazzling smiles. “Thank you,” he said lightly. You swore there were hearts in your eyes. You nodded and quickly turned back around to keep him from seeing the blush that was making its way to your face. You walked back to the counter, only to be met with a very smug-faced Jisung.

“So you don’t like him, huh?”

“Shut up,” you mumbled, embarrassed that you outed yourself so easily.

“Don’t worry. He seems to like you too.” Jisung nodded his head, gesturing behind you. Glancing in the direction, you awkwardly lock eyes with Seungmin. You snapped your head back to Jisung, who seemed satisfied with whatever work he thought he was doing.

“He’s been looking at you every chance he's gotten,” Jisung whispered, making you shake your head in disagreement. “He’s probably looking at the menu or something,” you say, trying to come up with some other logical reason.

“The menu isn’t taped to your name tag, (Y/n),” he laughed out, amused at how persistent you were being. Suddenly, Jisung’s expression changed, signaling that he was struck with an idea. He took a napkin off the counter and pulled a pen out of his apron pocket, quickly scribbling your Instagram handle onto the piece of paper.

“W-What are you doing?” You stuttered out, knowing all too well what he was about to do. “You’ll thank me later.” Jisung smiled, a mischievous tone to his voice. Before you could stop him, Jisung was already standing in front of Seungmin.

“Excuse me, but my coworker over there thinks you’re cute. I’ve noticed you checking them out, so I’ve taken the liberty upon myself to give you their Instagram.”Seungmin’s face flushed pink and you wanted to die where you were standing, you were so embarrassed. Jisung walked back to you with a big smile plastered across his face.

“You’re welcome!”

Finally, your shift had ended and you were home. You flopped down onto your bed, sighing in relief as you felt the pressure of standing all day leave your body. You rolled on to your back, fishing your phone out of your back pocket. Clicking on the power button, you were met with notifications from your social media from throughout the day. You quickly scrolled through, stopping to see who followed you.

Instagram, 11:36 am: @ ksm_00 has started following you!

Your eyes widened and you clicked the notification, making sure that it was really Seungmin and not someone else. Sure enough, it was really him. Throwing your phone down next to you, you grabbed your pillow and screamed into it. Once that little moment was over, you picked your phone back up and quickly texted Jisung a thank you.

Biting the inside of your cheek, you thought about what you should do next. Should you message him? Would that be weird? Sucking in a deep breath, you decided to just go for it. Opening up your DMs, you were surprised to see a message already there.

‘hey, sorry if this is weird, but ive been going to the coffee shop you work at for a while and i think youre really cute’

You kept re-reading the message over and over again. You were convinced you didn’t read right. Once you went over it for the fifth time, you started to freak out. Kim Seungmin — the Kim Seungmin — thought you were cute. Your hands started to shake a little as you typed out your response and you couldn’t help but wonder if he felt the same way when he messaged you.

‘haha, no, i dont find it weird at all. its kind of cute. if you wanna meet at my work tomorrow at 11 maybe we could talk and get to know each other more? the coffee is on me’

You were thankful that Seungmin seemed to be a quick texter, as it only took him a few moments to respond, saving you the anxiety of waiting for a reply.

‘are you sure i wouldn’t be distracting you from your job?’

‘no no its fine! i actually have tomorrow off but i figured it would be the easiest place to meet’

‘ok! consider it a date ;)’

Key smashing in all caps would be the best way to describe how you felt at that moment. You put a hand on your chest in an attempt to calm your racing heart — but to no avail. Putting up your phone, you worried about tomorrow. What if you fucked up? What if Seungmin was just trying to be nice? What if you were thinking way too much about everything? The last one was 100 percent likely, but you chose to do it anyway.

You couldn’t help worrying, though — you had spent enough time following him and his friends on Instagram. To put it simply; you weren’t like them. They all were the type to constantly look good, have flawless skin, and confidently show off their talents. You, on the other hand, tended to have days where you were imperfect and not as confident. Seeing them perhaps made you feel a little insecure about what you could be worth to Seungmin.

The next morning you woke up, dreading your meeting with Seungmin. Groggily, you grabbed your phone and clicked the home button. Rubbing your eyes, you squinted at your screen.

‘10:27 AM’

A jolt of panic struck through you and you shot out of your bed, hurrying to get ready to meet Seungmin. You wanted to look good and your work was about a 15-minute drive from your apartment, leaving you around 15 minutes to get ready so you could be a little early. You ran into your bathroom and quickly brushed your hair and teeth. Rushing into your room, you threw open your closet in hopes to find a decent outfit. Scanning over your clothes, you caught sight of your favorite sweater and sighed in relief, silently thanking your past self for washing clothes.

You arrived at the cafe five minutes before you and Seungmin agreed to meet up and you were glad to see that he wasn’t there yet. You were even more thankful to see Changbin and Minho behind the counter today and not Jisung. You knew he would give you hell at work if he saw you on your date.

“Hey, (Y/n), odd to see you here on your day off. What’s up?” Changbin asked. Hearing your name, Minho perked up from behind the cash register and smiled happily.

“(Y/n)! My favorite co-worker!” He laughed, earning a light punch on the shoulder from Changbin. Suddenly, the door chimed, signaling someone had walked in. Turning around, you saw Seungmin awkwardly standing in the doorway. Seeing you, he walked over and gave you an awkward, lopsided smile, like he was unsure what to do with himself. For the first time, it felt like you were seeing an awkward nineteen-year-old and not some internet celebrity.

The start of the date was tense, to say the least. Since the two of you were the only customers, it felt more open and awkward than you felt like it should.

“I’m sorry if I was too forward yesterday... I’m not really good a flirting.” Seungmin laughed nervously, scratching the back of his neck. You cracked a smile and laughed, making Seungmin’s face burn red with embarrassment.

“W-What? Why are you laughing?” He stuttered.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to laugh. You’re just being cute.”

Your own words honestly surprised you and you tried to look like you weren’t panicking. Thankfully, Seungmin grinned, bashfully looking down at the cup between his hands. Slowly, the conversation between the two of you started and before you knew it, three hours had passed.

“Holy shit, I can’t believe it’s already 2:00!” You and Seungmin walked out of the coffee shop and decided to take a walk together in the park nearby.

“I know! I really haven’t talked to someone for that long in a while! You’re really fun to talk to,” he said. You blushed, happy that he enjoyed your company.

“You’re not so bad yourself,” you quipped. Seungmin laughed and pushed his glasses back up the bridge of his nose.

The two of you walked peacefully through the park, shoulder-to-shoulder. While you were admiring some of the pretty hydrangeas, you felt a hand brush against your own. Looking over at Seungmin, you saw that he was looking at your hand, his face dusted a light pink. Smiling, you shyly held his hand. The two of you continued walking in comfortable silence, only really speaking when one of you spotted something to point out to the other. About an hour had passed before you decided you needed to get home since you had a class the next day.

“I had a lot of fun today. Could we... could we maybe do it again?” Seungmin asked. There was a nervous twinge to his voice, making you feel butterflies in your stomach.

“Of course! I had a lot of fun today,” you said. There was a pause and Seungmin looked like he was contemplating something. Taking in a deep breath, he placed a quick kiss on your cheek.

“How about a movie tomorrow after class?”

#skzwriters #straykidswriters #kim seungmin #x reader #reader imagine #imagine #oneshot #stray kids #stray kids imagine #fanfic #fanfiction #fluff #instagram au

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guylty · 5 years

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It’s been so bloody long, I really need to put this baby to bed. The last few things that need to be said about Red Dragon Con 5 – and I’ll make it relatively short because, yes, I am already bored with myself, too. [Added pre-publication but after finishing the post: Yeah, right, “short”… ] Sorry sorry sorry.

The brutalist charm of an airport hotel. The RDC venue, the Renaissance Hotel. Lovely.

When I rocked up in the venue at about 10.30am on Sunday morning, my first order of business was – queuing. You might remember that I had been blinded by the gorgeousness blinked in my precious photo with Richard, so I had to come in early for a re-shoot while Kate had a little more time to make her way to the hotel. I joined my queue… As I was finally getting into the room where the photo sessions were being held, observing Richard and his various co-sitters in the set-up, something amazing immediately occurred to me: Richard was putting his arm around everybody!!!! *gasp* Apparently someone had had a change of heart over night. Or someone else had taken him aside and given him a few pointers. Or maybe he just sneaked a peek at Twitter and saw that there had been some complaining. In any case, Richard seemed quite different on Sunday morning – and his new willingness to appear a little less reserved had a massive influence on his fans: The buzz in the room was undeniable; people literally appeared to be happier, more relaxed, very much in love even. Despite the human rights violation of a pair of loosely cut trousers, flapping from the supposedly delectable derriere of the OOA.

So once again the conveyor belt pushed me inevitably closer and closer to the epi centre: Leave your bag on the table. Show your photo badge to the helper. Five steps. Get the same warning as the day before. “No touching, no flower crowns.” Four steps. The flashes are really bright. Three steps. I must remember to really keep my eyes open. Two steps. Shit, I forgot Pop!Thorin. One step. I am next. Lift-off: I move into the frame. I say a polite hello to some tall bloke in a dark leather jacket. I look at the camera. Last second I decide to make the picture silly by pointing at that bloke. I feel a hand and an arm ghost across my back. I plaster a stupid grin on my face. As the flash goes off, I blink. I hurry out of the frame as quickly. What a horror show!

It remains a mystery to me how something as pedestrian as queueing and getting your photo taken, is so immensely draining on body and soul. When I came out of that session, I was basically ready for a lie-down. And it wasn’t even as if there had been any exciting exchange between me and Mr A. Quite the opposite, actually. We both very much kept to ‘our side of the bed’, so to speak. Luckily the next event was the 1pm Q&A with Richard. I readjusted my flower crown and went to look for Kate and Armidreamer.

Not *my* long face, but Claus with C – the rocking horse – modelling the exclusive Red Dragon FC, made by a sub division of RAPS Inc.

After another heart-breakingly good Q&A session with interview pro Richard Armitage, it was time for another stewarding stint again. And now the story got really interesting.

American Gothic all the way

Like the previous day, I had been put on photo collection duty for my volunteering on Sunday. When I got to the collection room, most pictures from the morning’s photo sessions had already been picked up and not much work was left to do. I spent a little while counting the photo “badges” (little receipts that had been used to make sure only paying con attendants got into the photo studio). It occurred to me to look for my own photo from the re-shoot. When I picked it up, I could not help but snort loudly. Once again I had closed my eyes when the flash went off – another photo op ruined. You really had to laugh. I was kind of muttering more to myself than anyone else “Ah no, I blinked again, my eyes are closed in my photo… too bad.” But a couple of women who actually worked properly for Starfury, apparently heard my mumbling, and I explained to them that I had ruined even the *second* of my photo ops. Ah well, no need to be sad. I had never really wanted to have a photo anyway. So I just accepted the fact that I am oversensitive to photographic flashes, and that was it.

And then, after a minute, the woman in charge of photo collection dropped a bombshell. “Do you want a re-shoot?” I could hardly understand what I was hearing. “Eh, yes…” I stammered, a thousand question marks in my tone. “Then you need to go now with this girl here. It’s the last picture of the day. Go go go.” Before I had time to understand what was happening, one of the Starfury assistants from the photo room was already looking for me in the photo collection room, and next thing I was already running with the girl through the hotel lobby to the backrooms where the photo sessions were held. The photo sessions were officially over, so the photo equipment was being packed up, the room rearranged. Instead of con attendants, the room was filled with volunteers and Starfury staff who were tidying up. The girl took me to the photographer, explaining that I was the last person that day to have a quick re-shoot. I apologised profusely for prolonging the photographer’s work, but he was calm and nice. He just told me to position myself in front of the backdrop, ready to have the picture taken as quickly as possible. Richard, I noticed, together with Mads Mikkelsen was still in the middle of signing one of the big banners that were going to be raffled off to the con attendants. Having to wait while standing under the bright illumination of the photo lights, is pure torture for someone who doesn’t like to be photographed in the first place. And I didn’t even have a prop with me to hide behind. Instead the thoughts were reeling in my head, telling myself I would have to concentrate on keeping my eyes open. And how the hell was I supposed to smile when I was actually struggling to keep myself from blushing with embarrassment?

And then things happen very quickly: At last, while I am still apologising/chatting with the photographer, Mads and Richard suddenly step into the photo area . I vaguely hear somebody explaining to them that there is to be one last re-shoot. I don’t know where to look, I am mortified, babbling apologies. Mads turns up on my left, and I sense Richard passing behind my back. It is actually Mads who addresses me with a grin and a chuckle: “Are you the blinker?” I have to laugh. “Yes. I am.” And I feel really bad when I actually turn him down – “but not with you but with Richard.” Mortally wounded (haha, or rather: not) Mads leaves the scene while somehow RA cops on that he is the one I want the picture with. I kind of sense that there is no point in saying much to RA – he is possibly less than impressed to have been roped in for a re-shoot and just wants this to be over. And so do I. I stand awkwardly beside him while trying to appear nonchalant, last-minute repeating my fun little finger-pointing gesture from the morning. *flash* I can feel I had my eyes closed. And the photographer says “hold on, let’s take another” while I feel my facial muscles spasm from the awkward artificial smiling. Yeah, American Gothic all the way now.

#gallery-0-4 { margin: auto; } #gallery-0-4 .gallery-item { float: left; margin-top: 10px; text-align: center; width: 50%; } #gallery-0-4 img { border: 2px solid #cfcfcf; } #gallery-0-4 .gallery-caption { margin-left: 0; } /* see gallery_shortcode() in wp-includes/media.php */

Alright, alright. Richard isn’t American Gothic, only I am. He smiled and his eyes sparkle. So there:

But boy, was that a struggle! I think the picture shows the strain, and so my advice to anyone similarly suffering from acute embarrassment in face of the OOA is to actually bring some kind of prop to the photo op. I definitely felt much less exposed when I had Pop!Thorin with me the day before. In the unlikely event of having to talk to Richard, Pop!Thorin at least would have provided a topic. Moreover, Pop!Thorin gave my hands an occupation, therefore avoiding both mirroring RA with hands in pockets, or looking like a family photo from a small town photo studio ca. 1984. Believe me, I know what I am talking about. I have been there. Both in 1984 and 35 years later. – I ran back to my stewarding job to finish my shift. And to thank the photo ladies for giving me the opportunity to re-shoot that picture. I knew that they had made an exception for me – it’s usually not possible to re-shoot photos (as is actually explained when you buy a token for the photo sessions). I, however, was lucky because I was volunteering with the right people. They simply were nice women. Which they not only proved with the whole re-shoot thing but something else.

The Heart in the Right Place

I always like to leave the best for last, and the following last incident from Sunday at RDC5 definitely ranks high among the many memories. The photo collection was pretty quiet by the time I came back from the photo re-shoot, and the ladies told me that there was no need for me to continue waiting there; they would look after the photo collections themselves. I packed up my stuff and was about to leave when I remembered one thing. Even though Hariclea couldn’t attend the con because of her mother’s death, she had obviously paid for her ticket. And while her included autograph allocation basically expired, the guys at the registration had promised me I could pick up Hariclea’s badge at the end of the con. After all there was a picture of Dolarhyde on the badge! The registration guy was sitting in the same room as the photo people, so I popped over to his desk and retrieved that badge. And by way of conversation I mentioned to the lovely photo ladies, that “my friend could not attend the con because her mother died the day before the con, and I am at least bringing this back for her as a souvenir”. The two of them looked at each other. Then one of them said: “Who’s her favourite star?” I said, “Richard.” She reached out her hand and said, “Just give me that for a moment.” I handed over the badge and she vanished with it. After 5 minutes she was back.

Just to spell it out: Without any prompting or suggesting from me, she had run over to the backrooms where Richard and Mads were still doing their autograph duties, and had obtained a signature from Richard on the ticket. I don’t know what she told him and how she did it, but she got the ticket signed by the man who Hariclea would’ve wanted to see. And for free. I was gobsmacked. And I don’t think there are words enough to say thank you to the photo ladies at Starfury’s Red Dragon Con 5. This was simply two decent people being touched by the kind of sad story that life writes – and reacting in a generous, kind and thoughtful way. And that counts for so much more than any kind of petty criticism for commercialised fandom events. I am annoyed with myself that I never asked for the two kind photo ladies’ names. But even without naming them, I am sure that the universe will reward them for their kindness. They so deserve it!

(Second but) Last Words

Right, I actually wanted to wrap up the whole con thing in this post, but again, I have been too elaborate. Apologies. I could leave it at this but that would be a bit unfair. I do want to give their dues to the other people whose appearances at the con I enjoyed. And I also want to say a last word about the fannibals and the various encounters I had. I promise, just one more post.

But to tie this one up, here’s a last reflection on the whole photo malarkey. I realise I am a lucky fan. I got my photograph with my favourite actor, and I was really lucky in that I came away with a version in which I *don’t* have my eyes closed. No complaints there. If there’s anything to complain about, it is me. The fangirl mind overanalyses all the time. Too busy are we, constantly monitoring what we say, what we think, and how we feel, in face of the OOA. Sometimes, I feel, that actually overshadows our enjoyment of the moment. That’s certainly what happened to me. There I was, standing beside this bloke whose talent and skills as a performer I so admire. It’s not every day that happens. And regardless of the vibes of reluctance and/or shyness that he was exuding all weekend, I *should have* loved every second I could stand beside the guy. I loved photographing him at the panels, I certainly loved listening to him speak, and if I had been a little less dim I would have loved the one-to-one moment at the signing, too. But the photo sessions? Boy, I couldn’t get out of there fast enough! This is just me and does not apply to everyone, but here is what I felt: The fact that I had two re-shoots kind of intensified or exacerbated the whole scenario for me. A rather luxurious complaint, I know. Taking three separate efforts to get a photo with my favourite star, I felt so embarrassed and awkward, put on the spot and as if my cover had been blown. No, I don’t believe that RA recognised me – I doubt he knows who I am. There is no reason why he should know me – I am one of thousands of people who turn up at events, waving a book or a programme at him, asking him to sign. Most of the time I hide behind my camera, anyway. But as much as I appreciated the exceptional circumstance that allowed me to have my picture taken (and *again*), for me it was definitely also a situation way beyond my comfort zone.

Even though the commercial aspect of the photo sessions legitimises our desire to be close (in proximity) to our favourite actor, there is one thing that money can’t buy: genuine interest. And that is what makes these photo ops and selfies by the stage door so difficult for me: I am there because I *want to* be there. I am genuinely interested in my favourite actor, and it is a pleasure for me to have the opportunity to see him live. But that is a pleasure that is not reciprocated. I understand that it can’t be, of course. There is only *one* of him – and *thousands* of fans. It is impossible for every fan encounter to be as meaningful to him as it is to the individual fan. But it is precisely this imbalance that I dislike. And I’d rather admire from afar and without acknowledgment, than from close up and only with polite tolerance. It also has got something to do with how *I* see myself, I guess. And while I know my shortcomings very well, I do believe that there is more to me than the fact that I like Richard Armitage. I don’t like to be defined predominantly by my status as a fan – especially by the guy who I am a fan of. Is that a contradiction or a logical conclusion?

I really don’t know. But I know one thing – with all my niggling about imbalance of interest: He was very fair about not singling anyone out – although he certainly had a bit of a Dibley revival weekend. But RA is not to blame for my difficulties with RL interactions. My overriding impression after observing those photo sessions and seeing Richard at the autograph signing, was one of gratefulness. I don’t know how he manages to so but he made every attempt at giving every fan their own special moment. Whether it is chatting with those Kiwi girls about NZ, expressing his admiration for Flat Richie’s international itinerary to armidreamer, laughing with Kate about Jill’s Gymkhana, or playing ‘Spot the Location’ with my photos, RA did try to be personable. You just have to be cool enough to take it. Which I am not.

High Emotions – Sunday at #RDC5 [part 9] It's been so bloody long, I really need to put this baby to bed. The last few things that need to be said about Red Dragon Con 5 - and I'll make it…

#Francis Dolarhyde #rdc5 #Red Dragon #Richard Armitage

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ink0ming · 5 years

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心痛

x // @idollings

the two of them were practically inseparable — it was something that people would expect with twins, but instead of clinging to his look alike, he found someone that he cherished as family far more. that was not to say that he didn’t love his brother somewhere deep inside, but he certainly didn’t show it openly. with akai, they were constantly showing affections towards the other, mostly platonic, but at times the red inkling would push the limits of friendship into a whole different territory. it really confused kuro, unsure of what to label their relationship any more – up till recently, he would have called the man nothing more ( and nothing less ) than his best friend, but with the mixed signals, it was getting difficult to differentiate. the confusion wasn’t just between the two of them – but also with himself, since he’d never really felt embarrassed around another man before. he would have never labelled himself a homosexual, but at times he would be questioning. he ( of course ) still liked women as well, but he wasn’t paying much attention to sexualities to know anything about what it could be labelled as.

the two were watching a movie together, but after all of the things they’d done earlier for grizz co., he was exhausted. for a bit he was able to stay focused on the screen, but the longer it went on the more sleepy he was beginning to feel. dozing off slowly, his head rolled to the side & pressed against the smaller’s gently. if it weren’t for the other’s figure next to him, he likely would have just toppled over. thankfully, akai was one of the few that matched him in size & could handle his weight without falling over. while he was snoozing, he really had no idea about the thoughts plaguing his friend. he liked to think that they could talk to each other about anything, but even he wasn’t following that idea. it seemed that it was easy to talk about anything that didn’t involve their relationship specifically. though … talking about things like kiiro and sora’s relationship would raise a tension between the two of them that was enough to make him squirm. talking about the two boys together only made him think even more about their position & he just couldn’t stand making himself flustered like that.

kuro wasn’t entirely asleep, but damn close to it. feeling someone’s lips pressed against his own was enough to make him snap back to full consciousness & try to figure out just what was happening. talking against the man’s lips, he mumbled. “a-akai?” there was no anger in his tone, just genuine confusion & possibly a bit of embarrassment. grabbing the other by the front of his shirt, he wasn’t going to let the man get away — he wanted to know what was going on. they’d avoided this topic for so long, it was starting to get to him. especially when the other would pull flirtatious moves like this. he couldn’t stand not understanding what was going on inside of akai’s head.

It was truly ironic how much closer Akai was than his actual twin brother; though he was not complaining. Just what were the odds that he was going to be someone more important than family to the man? He thought back and remembered how even his parents were so sceptical of him -- the first time he went to his house to drop off homework and sheets they handed out at school, wanting to fill in his friend due to the fact that he had been on detention (as many, many times after), Akai could still see the look on his mother’s face when he was coming to see Kuro. It bewildered her that anyone was wanting to be around him -- even Shiro was avoiding him, though, he’d see how both of them were avoiding each other. Though, he never pitied the other and more so admired him -- all the red inkling had known ever since was how to be popular, how to be liked, how to have plenty of people around him and be somewhat of a hearthrob towards others... he couldn’t imagine how it would be to live as isolated as the black inkling. But over the years, he was taught that all these people did not matter, the numbers would fluctuate anyway -- people come and go, but Kuro was the only one who stayed despite how hostile he was towards everyone else. It only strengthened his feelings for the man more and more.

Throwing his head back instantly when the other mumbled against his lips, he had hoped that he was simply talking in his sleep, but he was not going to test it; with wide eyes he stared at the other, though while he was attempting to shuffle away (not out of fear but simply to make it less awkward, though admittedly, he was not even sure how to make it less awkward simply by running out of the situation), Kuro was quick to pull him back in by his collar. All the while he kept his eyes locked with the others, still wide and in complete shock -- well, he had done it now, hadn’t he?! Lifting his hands defensively, it was so odd to not have the other yell at him, or insult him, usually whenever he was being flirtatious and invasive, Kuro made extra sure to threaten him, and he was ready for a beating or some kind of brawl between them, but instead he just... stared at him, probably expecting an explanation.

Akai felt like getting cold feet, his face changed from the expression of initial shock to a pathetic attempt in smiling at him, looking more so strained and scared than anything else -- especially when his eyes were still shimmering from before, when he felt misty-eyed due to pondering too much about it all. Usually, he never looked frightened around the black inkling -- even when they were rough with each other, he was constantly too cocky, flaunting with his own words way too much as to look fazed by the other’s violence or brutality. But he was terrified for a whole other reason. “G-Gotchu, haha... I k-knew you were a light sleeper! Totally woke you up!” He hated himself for lying like that, and it hurt his chest immensely to chicken out like that. “You really should do something about that, that’s... that’s most likely why your sleep quality is so p-piss-poor.” The more he spoke, he felt his voice failing him and it was so, so lame; with the cracking and the pitching, it was more than evident that he had been telling lies in order to steer away from the issue at hand.

Of course, he wanted to talk about it, and of course, he wanted him to know. But he simply cared too much about the other as to toss their friendship away like that. Moving his hands to cling onto the other’s wrists as he held him in place, he gulped and tried to maintain his facade without faltering; but he deemed it wiser to shut up now and have his voice -- and heart -- calm down first before he’d try to defend his position. It was so, so weird to not see him be upset and angered, perhaps that was frightening him more so than the regular shtick that Kuro had about lashing out so quickly.

#ic;#heartache1kurorp #idollings #��𝕒𝕤𝕤𝕚𝕠𝕟𝕒𝕥𝕖 𝕗𝕚𝕣𝕖 ⁽ᵃ ᵐᵒᵗʰ ᵗᵒ ᵗʰᵉ ᶠˡᵃᵐᵉ⁾ // akai;

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willgayers · 6 years

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like, imagine eddie working in a 24/7 convinience store during the night shift (like,,, 11pm-4am) and richie is a regular that just comes in the weirdest hours and buys the most bizarre combo of items and is always trying to flirt w eddie making puns with whatever items hes buying and eddie lowkey likes it (cue stan rolling his eyes)

lmaooo yes yes yes!!

eddie fucking HATES it

but he’s a destitute student (arent we all ha ha ha… send me money) so its not like he really has a choice ya know

he only really likes one of his co-workers (martha) and hates everyone else

but at least theres… something interesting about his job…

richie tozier is 18 and he lives by himself at a condo downtown and his life was pretty fucking boring taking he’d just moved into derry and he knew literally NO ONE other than the cool chick who lives in the same block of flats and richie saw her wearing a the smiths shirt so they became friends

but then one night,, richie was about to go for a smoke when he realized he’s all out

also he was kind of in the mood for chicken nuggets

and now that we’re at it how great would a bottle of soda be with that

he remembers seeing a convenience store near his house so he gets up from his couch and glances at the clock ,,, 2am its not that bad yet

so he gets out of the house and walks over to the store

he swings the door open and glances around. the lamps create a rather ugly yellow shade inside,, an old backstreet boys song is playing from the stereos and richie snorts

he doesnt see anyone behind the counter so he just goes straight to the fridge to grab some nuggets,, waddles over to the soda section and grabs a huge bottle of coke

and then he walks out from behind one isle and sees the prettiest?? boy?? ever??

richie drops the coke bottle and it starts to gush out

the boy behind the counter snaps his head towards richie the SECOND

richie does nothing

“HEY? EXCUSE ME???”

tozier just gapes at him

“ARE YOU GONNA PICK THAT UP??”

“holy shit” richie literally just blurts out

“??????” this guy is looking at richie like what the fUCK??

then richie flinches back to the moment

“shit,,, i mean,,, yes,, fuck,” richie starts to reach out for the bottle and eddie is like WHAT is this dude seriously gonna grab the-

the soda is still spilling out and some of it shoots straight against richie’s glasses

“FUCK” he yelps out and drops the bottle, some MORE of it just filling the floor

“oh my gOd just leave it,,, pay for the rest,” eddie sighs knowing he’s gonna have to clean it up

“i am so,,,so sorry” richie blurts out as he rubs his glasses against his shirt and walks towards the counter

eddie looks at him clearer now that he doesnt have the ridiculously big glasses covering half of his face,,, and he swallows because wow?? he’s actually really cute??

“yeah its… whatever” eddie murmurs, licking his lips nervously

“so you’ll take that only?” eddie asks, nodding towards the chicken nugget pack

“and a green marlboro”

eddie fights the urge to roll his eyes. he doesnt get smokers

but instead he just hands him the pack

“that’ll be 6.50″

“here,, and again i am terribly sorry about…”

they both glance behind richie where the coke is only now starting to die out

“yeah.” eddie just says

a few days later,,, richie’s at the skate park with his only friend in town

“can i tell you something.” richie asks as they’re chilling on top of their skates

“sure” beverly says,, takin a drag out of her cig

“i saw someone”

beverly starts to smirk wide at him

“oh yeah??? whats she look like i might know her”

richie glances away

“uh.. not a she, actually. a he”

“i go both ways” richie shrugs as beverly’s silently asking if he’s..? not that she’d judge him but out of curiosity

“okay well, whats HE look like”

“he works at the convenience store” richie says and the second he does beverly bursts out laughing

richie’s like ???what???

“oh my god, EDDIE KASPBRAK???”

“you know him???”

“ohh boy eddie kaspbrak is the princess of this town there’s no way in hell you’re gonna get with him”

richie’s heart sinks a little

“but hey!! theres plenty of pretty boys in this town”

richie doesnt care he wants that one

eddie’s lowkey thought of the weird guy who spilled coke all over the carpet also

one night richie’s about to make food but realizes he’s out of french fries. and he wants to eat chicken with french fries. he cant possibly eat it with rice that he has,, he just has to eat it with french fries oh well haha what a great thing he lives next to a convenience store!!

so he goes there,, and ,, its faith its destiny or at least thats what tozier thinks eddie is working

eddie’s stomach flips

mostly because he’s afraid he’s gonna break something again

“hello” richie says

“…hi..” eddie says, watching as richie walks,, trying to be all cool and casual but ends up walking against a Lays shelf

eddie drops his head quickly to hide his laughter as an embarrassed richie starts gathering up the chips

he ends up taking one tho only so that he can say he “did it on purpose”

“so you’re taking chips and french fries huh???”

“well why not. i like potatoes”

“great”

“uh-huh”

richie’s just staring at eddie as he’s doing his job and eddie can feel this so his cheeks are kinda heating up

“and a pack of green marlboros”

“right” eddie says,, remembering this from last time

“that’ll be 10dollars”

“thanks eddie”

eddie almost chokes as the guy flashes him a smirk and is about to leave

“how do you know my name???”

richie just winks and eddie’s stomach flips again but this time its over something completely different and before eddie could ask his name richie’s out of the store already. proud w himself

richie doesnt say anything to bevvie tho even tho they hang out bc he doesnt want 1) beverly to bring him down 2) to ruin the great moment when he’s gonna tell beverly he’s got a date with eddie and see the look on her face

after a couple of days richie goes back to buy a twix bar. and more cigarettes

“hi eds” richie says as he walks in and eddie goes bright red

“do not call me eds”

richie smirks as he shuffles to the desk

“can i have a pack of-”

eddie slams the marlboro green to the counter

richie smirks lightly

“and a twix”

“those are in front of you” eddie snaps

“yeah i know that, you handing it to me would’ve just been a great moment to accidentally brush my fingers against yours tho” richie sighs as he grabs the twix and places it on the desk with a sweet smile

eddie’s eyes widen and he has to fake a cough

“FIVE TWENTY, THANK YOU”

“here ya go” richie says and slides him the money

“whats your name??” eddie asks

“oh, are you interested in knowing??”

“no, but since you somehow know mine which is kind of stalkery and creepy-”

“richie” richie says as he opens the chocolate bar wrapper and bites down to it

eddie blinks at him

“richie”

“yeah” richie bites his chocolate again “thats me”

“you enjoying that?” eddie nods towards the twix bar that richie’s literally gorged

“i’ve had better things in my mouth but its okay”

eddie’s jaw drops lightly and he just stares at richie

and then someone clears their throat so eddie turns his gaze to the rather pissed off looking lady behind richie and he clears his throat

“oKAY! NEXT CUSTOMER PLEASE!”

richie glances behind him

“hey we were having a conversation here”

eddie’s eyes widen

“UH, NO WE WEREN’T!” Eddie fakes a nervous laugh “please just,, step ahead!!”

“wow, rude eds. im gonna go then”

“ooookayyyyy,,, byeeee” eddie says as he’s already beeping the next customer’s stuff but as richie walks away he still steals a glance at his back

richie just keeps on going back

everytime he buys something weird

“a vanilla candle..”

“yes, i like the smell”

“uh-huh”

*next time*

“meatballs and popcorn? please tell me you’re not mixing these two”

“i wasnt gonna but thanks for the idea”

*next time*

“cat food? you have a cat?”

“no”

eddie frowns

“then why would you buy cat food?”

“i wanted to see you” :’)

kaspbrak tries to ignore the butterflies he’s feeling rn

“…three thirty”

“thats some expensive kitty food. well, i hope my next door neighbor tanya will appreciate this”

“youre buying this for your neighbor??”

“yeah. she’s a nice old romani lady with three cats” richie says as he grabs the cat food and eddie starts to smile a little because thats so cute??

richie notices the smile and he just smiles back. no flirts or anything just smiles

“see ya later alligator” richie says and eddie rolls his eyes amusedly

“bye”

days pass by,,, richie coming in practically every day and he just doesnt even look around anymore he just grabs the first thing at hands length and puts it to the counter

batteries,, candy bags,, motorcycle magazines,, even tampons once

“…..”

“i get bad nosebleeds”

and eddie actually lets out a chuckle. an actual ,,, true chuckle and richie gets the biggest smile

“you want your regular?” eddie asks

“huh?”

“the marlboros”

“oh no i quit” richie shrugs and eddie looks surprised

“really?”

“yeah” richie shrugs

(lowkey he quit bc he somehow found out eddie doesnt like smokers)

*eddie heart-eyes intensify*

*another time*

richie’s feeling flirty one friday and buys a pack of condoms

“yyyyello” he says as he slams the pack against the table

eddie looks at it and oh wow he feels like he’s been hit in the chest

why the hell??? he doesnt even know this guy??? yet he kinda feels like he does???

“who’s the lucky girl” eddie comments as he beeps the pack

“who says its a girl” richie asks and eddie gets even more pissed off now because??? hE LIKES BOYS??? THATS EVEN WORSE

“right” eddie just dramatically snaps and before he can say the price richie speaks

“im kidding i dont really wanna buy those” he says

eddie quirks a brow

“huh?”

“i dont need them”

silence

“im not having sex”

silence

“i mean i ,,, i do have sex but im not currently having sex”

“…uh huh okay, thanks for sharing this w-”

“okay im getting DESPERATE i need you to go out on a date with me”

eddie’s eyes widen as he raises both of his brows now

“im sorry what”

“yes ,,oh my god PLEASE i’ve been coming here literally every day i thought it would be obvious as im buying things like fucking,,, tampons and protein bars when you can clearly see i haven’t worked out a day in my life”

eddie starts to smile (bc thats true)

“okay”

richie’s taken aback

“huh??”

“okay, i’ll go on a date with you”

“what seriously???”

“yeah” eddie smirks but then jokingly goes serious “just… dont put tampons up your nose”

“i promise i wont i dont even- well sometimes when i do get-”

eddie raises amused brows

“sorry” richie apologizes for talking too much again

eddie grabs a piece of paper and scrabbles something before folding it and handing it to richie

(smooth finger brushing was done btw)

(eddie did it on purpose)

(which sent tingles down richie’s spine)

“i have a free day tomorrow”

“oK THATS GREAT I GOTTA GO NOW BYE” richie’s shocked™

“wait!” eddie stopped him just as richie was about to turn around

“arent you forgetting something??” he says and richie drops his gaze to the counter where eddie’s sliding the condom pack towards richie

richie could fucking cry as he looks at the smirk on eddie’s face

“i dont-” he utters out like what the FuCk Is GoiNg ON

eddie doesnt say anything just raises his brows so richie swallows and nods and grabs the pack, shakily shoving them to the back of his jeans before he gets out and looks at the paper

its got a number

and then

eddie ,,, and a small heart after that

richie fucking SWOONS and he could do the whole breakfast club fist pump to the air

they have their date and its lit af and awh

and on monday richie hangs out with beverly

his phone rings and he answers

“hey cutie”

beverly raises her brows

“yeah im still at the skate park.”

silence

“yeah??” richie asks “yeah sure of course!! come here. ok see you”

“who was that?” bevvie asks

richie just smirks

bc literally seconds later eddie walks over (he was just around the corner)

beverly’s mouth drops

“hey!!” eddie smiles as he makes his way over to the two of them,, leaning down to press a kiss to richie’s lips as he sits down

“beverly,, you might know eddie” richie looks at beverly as he speaks ,, mentally saying HA HA BITCH!!!

beverly just gapes at the two of them

“hi:)” - eddie

“…hi…” beverly gives him an awkward smile

“so like,,, i was supposed to go to work today right?? but then my boss called me and wait im gonna show you this mail i was supposed to take to the post office-”

as eddie starts to grab something from his backpack and goes on with his talking,, beverly turns her shocked gaze to richie who just looks so fucking proud

“are you serious???” beverly mouths

“ohhh yeah” richie mouths back at him

“hey babe?” richie asks

“yeah?” eddie asks, turning his head towards richie from his backpack

“gimme another kiss” richie pouts and eddie rolls his eyes, kissing him again. richie starts jokingly planting dozens of tiny kisses on his mouth, making eddie giggle

beverly’s jaw only drops lower

they hang out for some time but once eddie leaves,, beverly speaks

“well,,, guess i was wrong”

richie just smiles wide bc ofc she was

its reddie

how do i end this??

fuck

bye

the end

@superbyersbros@xbell22@donthateonk8@stenbroughbros@reddiebrekmyheart@itsgreywaterrichie@donvex@blueeyespurpleskies@ageorgymi@oh-youre-the-worst@eddiekaaspbraak @whipashwhipash@rissyq @richietoaster @edskasqbrak @urtury@bukiminajimu@kcutieeesblog@stansmansuris@adorefack@reddieaddict@icyeyes102@denbroughbill@graveyardshipper@taletellingsir@anxiety-freak-yuuri@rheddie@queertrashmouth@richiefreakingtozier@castletozier@tohzier@80soleff@lonewolfhard@low-key-dying@sad-synth@richietoaster@badboyharrington@beepbeep-losers@temptedtozier@kaspbraccs@kylieee827-blog @sad-synth@low-key-dying@officiallyreddie@reddietofall@stanleyboii@eternitynurarms@remushlupin@turtleneckrichie@rosegoldrichie@80srichie@asteroidbill@lonewolfhard@trashmouthgazebos@littlepointman@finnhardwolf@allison0609 @fabulousprinceali @tatiscribbles @s-s-georgie @coralinejones @richiestoziiers @tatiscribbles

#reddie #richie tozier #eddie kaspbrak #hcs #it 2017 #it 2017 fanfiction #how many times did eddie raise his brows in this #i dont even know #but oh well #*EYEBROW RAISE*

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purplesurveys · 4 years

Text

659

Mosquitoes find you particularly delicious. The rainy season where I live is essentially equivalent to mosquito season, so there is definitely a certain period in a year where they are more than usual; and because I like having just my windows open when I sleep (I find the aircon too cold most of the time), the mosquitoes find their way to my room and so there’d be days I’d wake up filled with new bites. I’m lucky enough to have never had dengue. You cheated on Heads Up 7 Up in elementary school. We don’t play that here. We do have a game called 7 Up and it *may* be a variation of that, but 7 Up involves running and chasing haha. You had a favorite Spice Girl. I’m definitely not old enough to have reached Spice Girls’ peak, and out of all of them I only know Victoria Beckham. You remember watching the first episode of SpongeBob when it came out. I was only a year old when Spongebob first came out, so I didn’t watch it by then. I do know what episode you’re talking about, though – Spongebob was pretty much all I ever watched as a kid. You like to draw. I was never any good at drawing, so I hate every bit of it.

You wish you had a car. Sort of? I have my own car bought by my parents, but I am aiming to get my own car when I could afford it. My dream car is the Mini Cooper Clubman. You used to want to be a model. I’m embarrassed by it now, but it was a legitimate dream of mine before, so much so that I let my dad know of my intention (then) of becoming a runway model. Idk, I had a past friend who was into VS models and reblogged them all the time, so her interest rubbed off on me and I wanted to be like them as well. I cringe every time I remember, lmao. You wanted to be on the show All That. I wanted to be on all the Nickelodeon shows that had the same theme as All That. You enjoy public speaking. I’m good at it and can enjoy it on a good day, but sometimes I’ll get anxious. You have witnessed something supernatural. Nope. I’ve had friends tell me their stories and I believe them, but I can’t say the same for myself. You believe in the supernatural. Just ghosts. I don’t believe in folk creatures, like the ones we have in our native culture. You aren't heterosexual. My survey answers in the last six or so years have made this very blatant. You think the whole transgender thing is stupid. That’s twisted and sad and pitiful. You own a dreamcatcher. Two – one mini dreamcatcher and another giant one. I’ve had an attachment to them since seeing New Moon of the Twilight Saga – there’s a part where Jacob gives Bella her own dreamcatcher at a time when she got depressed and was having nightmares every night, and I know there had been many times when I was like Bella, so I wanted one for myself as well. You'd want a boho wedding. So not my style. My wedding’s going to be minimalist and at most, pastel-themed. You think pink is the best color for cars. Not for me, no. Simple is better; I like my cars white. You've been called a free spirit. Nope, and rightfully so. I wouldn’t call myself a free spirit either. I like trying out new things, but I also like having security blankets and safety nets around. You're the same height as your mom. Yeah pretty much. She’s just a tiny bit taller. You grew up watching Nickelodean. I grew up watching Nickelodeon*, but this works too. My cousins and I just flipped among three channels – Nickelodeon, Disney Channel, and Cartoon Network.

You have a sibling who looks like you. Nah we all have our own distinct looks. There are angles and expressions wherein we look more similar, but generally it’s easy to tell us apart. You like to write in a journal. This account is pretty much like my journal, and I love using this blog for my thoughts and ramblings. You're tired. It’s Friday, it’s the end of the week, and I’m so, so, SO tired. And of course I’m celebrating by drinking two cups of coffee and staying up as late as I want, lol. You felt sick today. The last time this happened was late last year. I felt feverish while I was out for dinner with Gab, but the weird thing about it was that I felt better and as if nothing happened literally a half hour later. You're very creative. That is the LAST word I would use to describe myself. You can be disorganized. I’m organized about a lot of things, but I’m also disorganized about a lot of things. I could never maintain my closet no matter how much I put an effort to fold everything neatly and start from square one. You have a fever right now. Nope.

You've enjoyed babysitting. We never explicitly used this term but I was always the go-to elder kid to look out for my baby cousins, especially when we still lived under the same roof as an extended family, and I loved every bit of it. I was okay with being the motherly figure while everyone else played games or with toys. You want to go to New York City to visit. Yeah. I like bustling cities, so I feel like NYC would be right up my alley. I don’t care much for Times Square though and I would probably spend most of my time going to their museums. You love tea. I’m not obsessed with it; I can take it or leave it. And I don’t like the teas that come with a teabag; I drink either the traditional Chinese tea or just sweet, unhealthy iced tea altogether. You don't play an instrument. Yeah and I get sad about this like two times a day lmao. I wish I could play just a tiny bit of piano and/or violin. You used to want Taylor Swift's hair. I never actively wanted to be anything like her. You enjoyed High School Musical. Of course. I was THERE when it came out, and I stayed for every bit of the first film, High School Musical 2, and High School Musical 3. I was right smack in the middle of the HSM frenzy and it’s one of the more cherishable moments of my childhood haha. Everybody knew the songs, the steps to We’re All In This Together, and had HSM shirts, bags, pencil cases, and notebooks. You watched The Rugrats Movie in the theater. I barely remember that it had a movie, and I don’t think I ever saw it. Definitely not in the cinemas. You've performed on stage in a musical. I’ve performed on stage (as part of a big group) for annual school productions, but I think they were all plays. Hated every second of it. You've had the lead role in a musical. Certainly not. You've had cramps so bad you threw up. No, but close. A few weeks ago I had a headache SO bad I actually had to run to the toilet only to dry heave. It’s never happened to me before so I got scared and I just slept it off to see what happened the next day. You've never had Nutella. 2010 Tumblr pressured everybody to get Nutella because it was all the rage at the time and all the cool kids were having it, so I also did at some point. You have a favorite blanket. The one Gabie gave me two Christmases ago is my favorite. You own family heirlooms. I’m sure we have some but they haven’t been passed on to me yet.

You have carved and painted pumpkins before. No, pumpkins aren’t really a thing here. As far as I know, coloring/painting on Easter eggs is a more common activity. You have colored Easter eggs. Yes, I used to do this with my (second) cousins when they were younger.

You've walked through a haunted house. I always say I’m into horror stuff, but tbh I think horror movies are the furthest I can go HAHAHA. I’ve never been in a haunted house whether day or night, and I think the only time you’d get me to do it is if I got paid for it. You've dressed up on Halloween. Plenty times. I was Dora the Explorer last year :D :D You've tried to kill yourself. You've had a false rumor spread about you. In Grade 6 I had a rumor come back to me saying I was bi and was seeing my friend Andi (who, to be fair, I had a crush on at the time but I didn’t realize it yet). I just found it cool at all that I had a rumor about me considering I wasn’t a popular kid and had literally 2 friends, so I didn’t let it bother me haaaaah. You've been kicked out of a store (whether for a good or bad reason.) It was at a McDonald’s lmao. My friends were playing a card game and were yelling every five seconds; I knew people were going to get pissed so I distanced myself as much as possible even though I was at the same table jkfghdgh. Eventually an old man had had enough and asked us to leave, which I was GLAD to do. You have a favorite stove burner that you always use. I don’t have a favorite...the one I use often just happens to be my regular one. You enjoy eating at fast food restaurants. I find them dirty and nasty so I only eat there if I absolutely have to, but I do like getting takeout and enjoy fast food in general. You like arrows and feathers and peace signs. Ugh cringe, this SCREAMS 2010 Tumblr hahahahaha. I mean I liked all of these at some point, but not now. You want to wear a flower crown for your wedding. Hell no. It was cute for a while, but not anymore. You have signed someone else's yearbook. We don’t do that here. We pay tons of money for our yearbooks that it’s practically destroying them if we ever wrote on them lmao. You were shy in high school. For the first half, I was shy and pretty unpopular. By the latter part of high school I managed to gain friends and end up in the ~popular~ circle, but I was still shy compared to my peers. I didn’t take up a lot of extracurriculars (which is what the popu kids tended to do) but I managed to stay within the circle until the end of it. You're shy when first getting to know someone. Of course, as most would be I would imagine. I can warm up fast, though. You've gotten all A's in a class before. In high school, this was me with English and history. In college, this would be me with my history electives.

You had a favorite class and a favorite teacher in high school. Sure! Our biology teacher in sophomore year was evvvvverybody’s crush. She was so pretty and kind and smart; when we went to a beach for our field trip, I tried getting stung by a jellyfish just so she’d treat the bite on my leg cos she was one out of two faculty members who knew how to treat stings HAHAHAH. I didn’t get the highest marks in her class, but I enjoyed nonetheless. You were a teacher's favorite. BY NO MEANS. Gabie was, though. We were total polar opposites when it came to how we acted in class. You've won a costume contest. I...don’t think I ever did, but my mom did go all out when it came to coming up with our costumes as kids. You have a favorite Disney princess. It used to be Ariel, then I found her annoying. My present favorite is Rapunzel. You get carsick. Only if I excessively do something while in a moving vehicle, like text or read. You've flown first class. Never have. You hate inequality and wish life were more fair. Don’t we all? You've had a bad neighbor. They weren’t bad per se. Just a bit chaotic and the kids (a little older than I was at the time) clearly had behavioral issues. I was so relieved when they moved out. You've done a cannonball. I don’t think so. You have fallen and hit your head. Nope, and that sounds like the literal worst thing. You like sunflowers. Sure! It’s a popular UP symbol – every year, a few weeks before the university-wide graduation, they’d plant huuundreds of sunflowers to line up the entire road leading to my school :) We usually refer to sunflowers as a sign of encouragement to keep on keeping on, so that one day the sunflowers will bloom for us as well. You like the name Skylar. It’s alright. I like it because it’s the name of the badass mom in Breaking Bad, but otherwise it’s nothing too special for me. You've had a friend named Sarah. I have acquaintances with the name Sarah but they’re not my friends. You have an Aunt Robin. Nope. I would end up being the Aunt Robyn in a few years, hahahaha. You have an Uncle Rick. I’ve never heard of an Uncle/Tito Rick, but with how big Filipino families are I wouldn’t be surprised if I turned out to have one. You have a cousin Annabelle. No, but close. I have an Auntie Bel whose whole name is Amabel. You think flying a kite is boring. I never had fun doing it, or whenever we had to do it as a school activity. You were born in the year of the Dragon. Tiger, yo. You like your Chinese zodiac sign better than your American one. I don’t care for either. Your laptop has shut off because it got too hot. It’s never done this before, thank goodness. I try not to overwork it either. You've accidentally caught something on fire. Nope, I don’t think this has happened to me before. You make your bed every day. Aside from my mom requires me to, a neat bed makes the entire room feel much cleaner so I do it anyway. You wear a digital watch. I have a bad record of losing watches, so I never like wearing them. You have a favorite park. We don’t have a lot of parks here to even pick favorites from to begin with, which is a shame. You've hiked a mountain. I want to sooooo bad. It’s just never happened before/yet. You want to hike a mountain again. ^ You've been a slave. What the fuck. You feel like you've had your free will stolen from you. My parents were quite strict before but it never felt this bad. You speak in tongues. If you mean I can speak more than one language, then sure. You enjoy medieval festivals. Never been interested in anything medieval. Your favorite fair ride is the pirate ship. I don’t ride rides. Cotton candy isn't that good. It’s a cute concept but I wouldn’t always pay for it. Men look good in pink. Men – and anybody – would look good in any color so long as they’re comfortable with it lol. You went to youth group. Hell no. I’m glad my mom never forced me either. You were baptized in a lake. No. Just in a church. You were on Color Guard. I have no idea what this means. You went to your senior prom. We had a junior prom that I went to, and that was it for my school; but I was also asked to go to a senior ball of another school. Your first kiss was just an experiment. No, it was a legit kiss. You dated a guy you didn't like. Almost did, though. You have fallen asleep in class. Never. I never want this to happen, either. You have won an award. A few times. You type fast. Yeah, you get used to it through the years. You have a lot of dreams for your future. I still want to do a lot, yes. You've gone camping in the woods. Never, but it’d be a cool experience. I wouldn’t want to be alone though. You love to sleep under the stars. I don’t get to do this but it sounds like a lovely time. You've gone camping in the fall. I haven’t gone camping at allllllll. You own a pair of slipper socks. That sounds way too hot for where I live lmao.

#survey #surveys

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chasholidays · 6 years

Photo

Like, Love, Haha, Wow

A Followers timestamp for @spectacular-spectacular and @pottersandtheirredheads, whom tumblr will not let me tag. Thanks to @bgonemydear for graphic!

"I still don't understand how famous people go on the internet."

Clarke glances over at Bellamy, sees he’s on tumblr and his dashboard has presented him with a photoset of pictures of the two of them together, taken from Clarke's instagram.

"The same way regular people do, but our computers are better and our connections are faster."

He snorts. "You know that's not what I meant."

"Yeah, but I wanted to be a dick." She leans in to check the tags on the post: #clarke griffin #clarke griffin's incredibly hot boyfriend #seriously are we sure he's not a model? #or some kind of perfect human specimen she had custom made for her in a hot guy lab? #does anyone know where this hot guy lab is? #asking for a friend. "Who is this person? Are you following them? Which account are you on?"

It's not like he doesn't use bb-hate anymore, but he has had to cut back. It's not, exactly, that he has an internet presence he's embarrassed of, it's just that he has an internet presence he didn't think anyone would ever care about. He curates hollywood-histories carefully, but his personal blog was just that. With his own name in use, it didn't take long for the followers he had there to figure it out, and once one person started spreading the word among her fans, it caught on.

Apparently he's not used to getting anons asking for threesomes.

So he's largely abandoned that tumblr, only passed the new one along to mutuals he actually trusted, and he's rebuilding a new kind of internet footprint.

"This is the one I made to stan for you," he says, and she snorts.

"I forgot about that one."

"I was just checking the Clarke Griffin tag, but I decided I wanted to start actually keeping up with some of the fansites and BNFs. See if there was anything--bad, I guess."

"You know Raven does that, right?"

"We can both do it. You have plenty of weird fans to go around."

"I guess I'm just used to it," she admits. "All of it. I was raised knowing that people were interested in my parents, and interested in me. I knew about all this--stuff." He raises his eyebrows, and she shrugs. "There was a countdown website for when I turned eighteen."

"Jesus, really?"

She shrugs. "People are gross and women are oversexualized. That's why my mom didn't want me to come out as bi as early as I did, she thought it would make people worse. And maybe it did, I don't know. There was enough grossness that a little more didn't register. I did warn you," she adds, because she did.

"Is it worth it?" he asks.

"I think so. I don't know what else I'd do."

"That's a shitty reason to do anything," he teases.

"I like it. And it's been better, recently."

"Why?"

"You."

He actually looks surprised. "Me?"

"It's nice to have a personal life. And someone who's just--mine. I've never had that before."

He smiles, a pleased flush on his cheeks. "I like you too."

"So it's worth it to you too? Celebrity by proxy? Because it's going to get worse."

His expression falters. "Worse how?"

"We've got that premiere next week. Imagine how good they're going to think you look in a suit."

"I do look good in a suit." He kisses her hair. "It's mostly still--fucking surreal. That people are interested in me. I went from like fifty Instagram followers to twenty thousand. And I keep getting new ones. I don't even do anything on Instagram."

"I should be recording these conversations for my mother. She was so sure you were just using me to get famous, and every time you realize people know who you are it freaks you out."

"It's weird," he grumbles. "What's a red carpet like, anyway?"

"Depends on the red carpet. This one shouldn't be too bad. The movie's pretty small, so it's not like--legions of screaming fans or anything. You'll look nice, we'll get our picture taken, you won't be in some of the pictures because no one cares about you. Sorry."

"Yeah, we talked about this. I would love if no one cared about me."

"Most of your Instagram followers are just hoping you're going to post pictures of me, if that helps."

"Sort of." He clears his throat. "Look, it's not like--it's not exactly a downside for me. It's fucking surreal, don't get me wrong, and sometimes people will recognize me, which is weird. All my classmates know, and my professors, and sometimes people ask me about you. It's definitely weird, but it's not some huge burden. And at least the internet thinks I'm hot."

“Yeah, that’s a comfort.”

“It is. Not—I don’t need it for my self esteem or anything, but it would suck if the what’s she doing with that guy? tags outnumbered the good ones.”

“Yeah, you wouldn’t be able to stalk me on tumblr.”

“And that would be the real tragedy.” He leans over and kisses her. “It’s worth it, Clarke. A lot worse than this would be worth it. I just still can’t believe this is my life,” he finishes, nodding to the tumblr post. It’s got almost 1500 notes, and as far as she’s concerned it deserves more. They’re really cute.

“I can’t either,” she says. “But maybe we’ll get used to it.”

“Are you sure you want to do this? You could find another escort.”

Clarke frowns at her mother. “That seems like a waste when I already have a boyfriend.”

Abby sighs. “I’m not asking because I don’t like him. I think he’s a very good boyfriend for you.”

A month ago, Clarke wouldn’t have believed her, but Abby really does seem to have come around on Bellamy. Clarke thinks it’s a combination the way he’s mildly terrified of cameras and his obvious and genuine adoration for her.

“So why are you asking?”

“Because I know how overwhelming public appearances can be. If he’s not ready, it wouldn’t be hard to find you some other company. One of your co-stars from Goredd, maybe, someone who obviously reads as a friend.”

“I think this is probably a good choice for his first one,” she says, slow. If Abby wants to have a real discussion of this, Clarke is game. “It’s not like there’s going to be a ton of press. If he can’t handle this, it’s way better for us to find out now, instead of letting him off the hook and bringing him to a blockbuster.”

Abby regards her for a moment, and then asks the question Clarke’s been expecting since she told her mother about Bellamy three months ago. “So, you think he’s going to be here for a while.”

"I want him to be. And even if I didn't, it seems stupid to plan around him not being around."

"That's not what I meant. You know how it is. I know how much he cares about you, but your star is on the rise. This is likely to get harder, not easier."

Clarke's not actually sure that's true. Bellamy is, honestly, the most interesting thing that's happened to her on a personal level in years, both for her and for the media. She's always been a disappointing child star, quiet and serious, and part of that has been that she's not necessarily interested in becoming a star. Prestige TV is a good fit for her, a schedule more like a regular job, time to really dig into her role, to get to know her character. Some of her co-stars are less enamored of it, don't like having to be doing the same thing for so long. Some people get into acting because they want a lot of roles, but Clarke is aware, always, that this isn't her passion, not like it is for a lot of actors. It's a day job, and TV shows make a better day job.

Her mother thinks that Goredd is the next step in her career, but Clarke's starting to wonder if it might be the peak. If this might be the height of her ambition. Not that she can't do movies sometimes, over the summer, but she thinks that being that kind of actress might not really be her goal.

It's possible it won't get worse. Especially as Bellamy stops being exciting. Her dating a grad student she met on the internet is a great story, and she can certainly get publicity out of it for now, but if they keep on being themselves, two nerds who like hanging out on the couch and watching bad movies, the opposite of an exciting tabloid cover story.

That could be enough for Clarke, as a future. A steady career, a quiet life, a boy she thinks she might already love.

"I want him to come with me," she says. "And he already got a tux."

"You already got him a tux."

"I'm a lot richer than he is," she says. There's clearly still a part of Abby that thinks Bellamy is taking advantage of Clarke's wealth, but Clarke couldn't live with herself if she made Bellamy rent his own tux to go to her event. If not for her, he wouldn't be going to this, and nice tuxes are expensive. Even just rentals. "If you say you like him, you have to actually like him."

"I like him." It's not even that grudging, when she says it. "But--he's nothing like I was picturing for your boyfriend."

"He's nothing like I was picturing either," says Clarke. "I'm just lucky, I guess."

"So is this premiere a quid-pro-quo situation?" Bellamy asks. He's straightening his tie and adjusting his hair in the mirror, and Clarke is watching him both because she likes watching him and because she knows she's set and she doesn't want to start obsessing over how she looks. Looking at Bellamy is a lot better.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

He finally gives up on tweaking his appearance and sits down next to her on the bed. "I have the grad-school equivalent of a red carpet next week. I couldn't decide if I wanted to ask you to come or not, but then I realized I don't want to go alone."

"I'm not sure what the grad-school equivalent of a red carpet is."

"Department cocktail party. It's--everyone else is going to be bringing significant others, but I feel like if I do it I'm showing off. But that's bullshit. You're my girlfriend, I want you to come with me. And it's not like they don't know we're dating."

"Do you want me to come?"

"Yeah, of course."

"Then I'll come. Assuming I don't have a conflict."

His mouth tugs up in a small smile. "Thanks."

"That doesn't have to be a quid-pro-quo thing," she points out, bumping her shoulder against his. "You don't have to come to things with me to get me to come with you. That's just girlfriend stuff."

"I figure it's probably kind of--" He waves his hand vaguely. "It's like a public appearance. Those are stressful."

"It's not. I'm not there to be Clarke Griffin, I'm there to be your girlfriend. I can be polite and shut people down and shift focus to you."

His eyes narrow, expression clouding with suspicion. "I always forget you're actually good at this stuff."

"It's my job. Speaking of which." She exhales and stands. "The car should be here soon. Are you ready?"

"Almost." He stands himself, leaning down to press his mouth against hers, soft and brief, trying not to mess up her makeup. And then he sighs, gives her a crooked smile. "Okay, ready."

The movie is a fairly small independent, with good award buzz, but a limited release. It's very much a critic's movie, and Abby was the one who wanted her to take it, another positive step for her career as a serious movie actress. Clarke likes it well enough, but she's definitely a supporting player in a guy's life, not quite a prize, but not a fully formed character on the page. It's the kind of thing where she might get some nods for best supporting actress, even though she's third-billed, just because the story isn't enough hers.

If she'd been dating Bellamy when she was filming it, she probably would have complained a lot. As it is, she just says, "This is the film equivalent of when a white guy in his thirties tells you he's been writing a movie loosely inspired by his own life, just so you're prepared."

He snorts. "So, the main character is a writer going through a mid-life crisis? Are you the grad student he decides he needs to sleep with?"

"No, I would have vetoed that. It's not as bad a role as it could be, but you can tell that the writer assumed my character just stopped existing when a guy wasn't looking at her."

"What do you say about stuff like that? When people ask."

"Euphemisms, and then in like ten years I can be honest." She shrugs. "It's not as bad as some of them, I just wanted you to be ready. It's not my favorite project."

He squeezes her hand. "It's going to be fun. I haven't seen you on the big screen since we started dating. It'll be even weirder than regular TV. Do you take your shirt off? Is it that kind of indie movie?"

"Is that really a draw? You saw me naked like half an hour ago."

"I'm pretty sure I'm never going to get tired of seeing you with your shirt off."

She has to smile. "I think it's just down to bra and then the sex scene fades to black."

"Whatever, I'll take it. Anything else I need to be doing? Do you like your co-stars? Is anyone going to ask me any questions?"

"Just be yourself."

"Are you sure?" he teases. "Sometimes myself is an asshole."

"Just don't be honest about what you thought of the movie. Unless you liked it. You really don't have to be nervous," she adds. "I trust your judgement."

“Cool, can’t wait to break that trust.”

Clarke glances at him. “You aren’t actually nervous, are you?”

“No. Can I take a picture of us for my Instagram?”

“You want to?” she asks, surprised.

He huffs. “I’m going to the red carpet premiere of my girlfriend’s movie. This is exactly the kind of thing I want to be documenting on Instagram. If my thirty thousand followers want to say weird shit about it, I’ll live.”

She snuggles in close so he can get the shot. “I’ll tell Raven to share it from my account too,” she says, and he takes a few so they can pick the best one together.

The red carpet is, as always, kind of a weird zoo. She and Bellamy pose and smile, and she introduces, and he gives the right answers to all the questions he gets about if this is his first premiere and if he’s excited and what tux he’s wearing and what he’s studying.

For Clarke, it’s a lot better than she was expecting. Not that she thought it would be bad, but she never really likes these things that much. They tend to wear her out.

But she liked her co-stars, and she finds she’s looking forward to introducing them to Bellamy. Raven meets them there so she can do social media stuff and get free drinks, and suddenly it’s a lot less like a work event and more like seeing a movie with a couple of friends, albeit a movie that she’s in.

Plus, there are a lot of cute pictures of her and Bellamy in formalwear. She’s definitely happy about that.

“You could do this more often, right?” she asks, finding his hand in the dark before the movie starts.

He kisses her hair. “As many times as you want me to, yeah.”

Clarke Griffin fandom is, apparently, very excited about the pictures.

“There’s definitely a vocal minority that’s upset you’re dating a guy because it means you’re not a real bisexual,” he says. “But I’ve been fighting them.”

“You have? Really?”

“Don’t act like you don’t want to fight them.”

“Obviously, but I guess I usually don’t.”

He shrugs. “I’m not doing it as myself. I know how to sockpuppet. But someone needs to remind them what bisexuality means.”

“Are there a lot of cute pictures of us?”

“Tons. My selfie’s definitely the most popular.”

“Everyone likes a candid. And we're cute." She props her chin on his shoulder, closing her eyes. She had a long day filming, but she likes coming home to find him in her place. He hasn't officially moved in yet, but she gave him a key and he's around all the time, and Clarke loves it, loves coming home to find him there, making dinner or drinking tea or playing video games. "I'm really glad you came. To the premiere."

"Me too. I'm excited to go to more." She feels his lips press against her temple. "Seriously, I had fun. It wasn't hard."

"So what about yours? Grad-school red carpet. How am I going to do with that?"

"It's more similar than I thought it would be, honestly. Mostly a lot of drinking and schmoozing, but there's a speaker instead of a movie."

"That doesn't sound too bad."

"No." He clears his throat and she opens her eyes to consider him, all perfect profile and freckles. "Just--I assume it's a lot weirder being the only famous person in the room than the only non-famous person on a red carpet. I don't know how anyone's going to act."

"You're a lot more likely to run into people being assholes to you in Hollywood."

"You say that, but academia's full of snobs, and you--" He worries his lip. "At least one person is going to be an asshole about how your highest degree is a GED. And you can deal with that, I know you can, I'm not worried. Just--I'm sorry it's going to happen."

Clarke smiles, kisses his jaw. "I'll be fine. I've had producers condescending to me since before I knew the word for it. It sucks, but that's not going to be new. And we can gossip about the assholes after."

"So, you're telling me this relationship might actually work?" he teases. "Who would have thought."

"Not to jinx it," she says, taking his hand and twining their fingers together, "but I really think it might."

She's pretty sure Bellamy is more nervous than she is about the whole thing, and Clarke will admit, she can't blame him. There's this inherent risk to bringing a high-profile guest anywhere, and bringing a B-list actress to an academic lecture is really a lot. The fact that she's his girlfriend and his bringing her is completely understandable only does so much good. She's still Clarke Griffin, and it's still weird for her to be here.

But she's not planning on going anywhere, so they should get used to her.

"You know, I've seen pictures, you talked about her, but I still didn't really think she was real," says the first girl they meet, Harper. "Or, you know, your girlfriend."

"That would have been the weirdest long con ever. Was I hacking her official social media accounts and no one noticed? She puts pictures of me on her Instagram."

"Technically my social media manager does that," Clarke says. "She says I'm not good at Instagram."

"You're not good at Instagram," Bellamy agrees. He considers Harper for a moment. "Were you guys betting on if she'd really show up?"

"Obviously. Not money, but--yeah, we were gossiping about it like every time you weren't around. Sorry!" she adds, flashing Clarke a smile. "Just--it sounds so fake."

"If I was going to make up a fake girlfriend, I wouldn't pick a famous actress. I would have said she lived in Canada like a normal person."

"I film in Vancouver sometimes. I could totally be your girlfriend who lives in Canada."

"Lives in LA, commutes to Canada sometimes."

Harper is watching them with a smile playing on her lips, but when Bellamy raises his eyebrows, all she says is, "You know, I can see it. I see why you guys are dating." She pauses. "But you didn't really meet on tumblr, right?"

It's not as representative of the evening as Clarke would like. His classmates are mostly fine, aside from the expected assholes, the ones he's been ranting about before they started dating. And it is nice to be able to put faces to the names, to meet the people who make up his day-to-day life.

But she hasn't felt so conspicuous in a while, and hasn't felt so guilty about it. She draws attention in a way she didn't want to, news that she's around spreading like wildfire, heads turning wherever she goes. And while Bellamy doesn't seem annoyed that she's drawing focus, he is clearly annoyed that everyone is being so, well, obvious.

"Fuck, you're just a person," he says, once they're on their way back to her place.

"Thanks."

The teasing tone doesn't quite land, and he deflates. "Sorry. I'm not--I shouldn't have asked you to come, I'm sorry."

"I don't mind," she says. "It's just--it's going to take some getting used to. More for them than for me. It's like Harper said, probably a lot of them didn't really get it."

"I tried to warn them."

She squeezes his hand. "Seriously, it's fine. I haven't felt weirdly famous in a while. It's probably good."

"Sure it is." He wets his lips. "You want to get used to it?"

"The lecture was really interesting," she says. "I wouldn't mind coming to more. And once Goredd wraps, I think I might want to get a degree? I don't know. I like school, I think it would be fun. So I should do that where you are, so everyone will be used to me."

After a second, he laughs, this soft, short little huff. "Sometimes I still can't believe you're--trust me, I want to still be your boyfriend when Goredd wraps. I want to be your boyfriend forever. But it's still hard to imagine. Having a future together."

"Yeah." She leans her head on his shoulder. "I love you," she says, soft. It's hard to know if it's too soon, but it doesn't feel too soon. She's been thinking it for weeks, and she's tired of not saying it, tired of thinking he might not know. "I'm not planning on breaking up with you."

"I love you too," he says, and tilts her chin up for a kiss. "So--we're going to get better at this stuff."

"Yeah," she agrees. "I think we'll be fine."

The next red carpet is six months later, and it's both a much bigger and much smaller deal.

"I'm not actually nominated for anything personally, so they're not going to want to talk to me too much. Just some sound bytes about the movie."

"I know you think this is helping, but we're still going to the Oscars."

“You don’t have to come.”

“It’s the Oscars, Clarke, of course I’m coming. Especially since you’re not sure you want to do more movies. This might be my last chance.”

“They invite me every year, I just usually don’t go. If you want to, we can whenever, but it’s honestly pretty boring.”

He pauses, and then starts to laugh. “Jesus, I can’t believe I’m dating someone who goes to the Oscars so often it’s not even novel anymore.”

“My mom used to make me com with her.”

“Yeah, that’s what I’m talking about.”

“Is there an academic equivalent of the Oscars? Do I go to that?”

“Probably graduation. I assume you’ll come to mine and skip it once I’m just a professor.”

“Just a professor,” she teases. “Like that’s not an amazing accomplishment.”

“It will be if anyone hires me. Until they do, I’m sticking to trophy boyfriend. Which is the other reason I’m coming to the Oscars. If I’m not around to be arm candy, what good am I?”

She tugs him down by the lapels of his tux, giving him a much quicker kiss than she’d like. Bellamy was basically made to wear formalwear; tumblr’s going to be so excited.

“I think you have a couple other things going for you,” she tells him.

“Maybe one or two, yeah.” He puts his arm around her. “I want another selfie. I think pre-red-carpet selfies are going to be my thing. I’m trying to hit fifty thousand Instagram followers.”

“Really?”

He reconsiders. “I want to hit fifty thousand, but I’m not really putting any special effort into it. But it would be cool, right? To have a tradition.”

“Yeah, a tradition would be nice.”

And it is nice, every single time.

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its-love-u-asshole · 6 years

Text

about me as a writer

I was tagged by @oiivkawa <3 Thanks so much, this was super fun!

Tagging: @emeraldwaves @ivyfics @calmgeyama @ohoholyshit @yatatsukki and?? anyone else who wants to I guess lol, I feel like most ppl I know how been tagged ^^

I’m putting my responses under the cut as well bc I know myself lmao, my responses can be long af ^^’’

1. How did you come up with your username and what does it mean? bleh I have two usernames, and both stories are embarrassing LOL I’ll go with my actual ao3 name though I guess?? When I was in middle (?) school I used to watch the anime HOTD, which is like...awful first off. It’s borderline hentai, shitty fanservice, the whole thing (don’t ask me why I watched it, bc who knows, the music was A+) but my favorite character’s name was Saya, and her servants would call her ladysaya, so that’s the explanation for that ha. I put the x in front because I used to be obsessed with x men and all the marvel/dc animated series, so it felt appropriate pft. Man, even talking about this brings back so many cringe worthy memories lmao forgive me.

2. Which fanfic of yours has the most feedback? (Bookmarks/ Subscriptions/ Hits/ Kudos) for Haikyuu!! it’s definitely Slipping Underneath, and for K Project it’s There You Are <3

3. What is your AO3 profile icon and why did you choose it? It’s Semi! The reasoning for this is because I have 3 fav Haikyuu!! characters: Tsukishima, Oikawa, and Semi. So I just try to distribute my love evenly tbh lol. I have a Tsukki icon on here and discord, Semi for AO3, and Oikawa is on my phone case ^^

4. Do you have any regular/favourite commenters? ahhh I have several but I’m not aware if many of them have tumblr?? A lot of people who comment on every chapter of my multichapters are very special to me, I love them all! Ofc on here there’s @emeraldwaves @ivyfics @momomirasaki124 @uselessvalshit @starjem and then I have my other fav supporters @serviceace @caelestisxyz and @urikawa-miyuki <3

5. Is there a fanfic you keep going back to read again and again? Ah damn there are so many lmfao, I have a lot of fav fics and I don’t want to make this post super long. Please check out the rec posts I’ve done here and here ! Or also message me for specific types of fics <3 I will say though, one fic I always go back to read even though it’s been YEARS is a kyoukao fic by potionwine!

6. How many stories are you subscribed to? How many do you have bookmarked? I consider myself pretty picky, but I do read a LOT of fic, so I have a decent amount of both ^^ About 187 bookmarks, and 16 fic/author subscriptions!

7. Which AU do you find yourself writing the most? Probably college?? even though I know that’s super broad, and all kinds of different AUs can be based in college but that’s how it is lol. I think that’s because I honestly don’t like redoing AUs?? I like experimenting and making up really weird shit and original scenarios as much as possible. Though, I’m sure you can find apparent trends across all my fics ^^

8. How many people are subscribed and bookmarked to you in total? haha...I have 76 user subscriptions, 436 general fic subscriptions, and 792 bookmarks. I don’t even know how that’s real lmao I feel so blessed that so many people enjoy my writing <3

9. Is there something you’d like to write about but are afraid of people judging you for it? (Feeling brave? If so, share it!) not really honestly, if I have an embarrassing or indulgent idea at this point, I just write it lmao idc but there are lots of types of fics I am scared to write just bc I don’t know if I could do them justice heh....

10. Is there anything you’d like to be better at? Writing certain scenes or genres, replying to comments, updating better, etc. yes lmao updating better would be something I’d LOVE to improve on ; ; Also writing action scenes too fff fuck action scenes

11. Do you write rarepairs or popular ships more often? Uhhh I’ve dabbled in both but yeah, more often than not I stick to more popular pairs just because I need content to motivate me pftt

12. How many stories have you posted on AO3 to this day? 50!

13. How many stories do you have saved in/ with your writing program? Like WIPs? ffff WIPs...maybe like 4 or 5 at this point, including multichapters, and wow that’s actually not a lot, usually I have a ton and I’m drowning in them loool

14. Do you write down story ideas or just keep them in your head? Both...I usually just keep things in my head, but if a fic starts giving me issues, I like to plot it out

15. Have you ever co- authored a story? Nope, but I’d really love to at some point with a friend!

16. How did you discover AO3? Uh I honestly don’t remember loool I think one day I sorta just saw that no one was using ff anymore and I was like ‘aight’

17. Do you consider yourself to be a popular or famous author in your fandom(s) on AO3? Not really lmao, I mean...my siren au does pretty well, but otherwise my fics get kinda slept on -shrug- it is what it is

18. Do you have a nickname or fandom name for your readers? lol i do not

19. Was there an author who inspired or encouraged you to write? Well I’ve always loved to write so no, but @brynne-lagaao is a big reason I started writing sarumi fics back when I was in K fandom! And nowadays in the hq fandom, a lot of amazing authors really push me to keep writing ^^

20. What writing advice would you give to a beginning author? don’t be afraid to write and write whatever you want basically lmao I know it can be daunting if you think your writing skills aren’t matching up with other authors, but the best thing you can do is practice, practice, and eventually you will see results! Also read a lot, reading other ppl’s stories really helps, and above all, just have fun with it!

21. Do you plot out your stories or do you just figure it out as you go? I try to have a basic plot (beginning, middle, end) because I used to just DIVE IN to stories and it was awful lmao I need some sort of guideline, even if it’s small

22. Have you ever gotten a bad comment on a story? If so, what did you do? yes ofc, but I honestly try not to dwell on them because they’re not worth it. I either ignore or delete in most cases

23. Is there a certain type of scene that you have a hard time writing? (Action, smut, etc) action and smut are never easy for me lol

24. What story(s) are you working on now? well right now I’m working on two secret santa fics for iwaoi, as well as my two kurotsuki multichapters! I am also trying to write kacchako as a x-mas present for a friend lol

25. Do you plan your new projects before you finish your current ongoing story(s)? ha yeah, it’s a bad habit but I have no self-control

26. Do you have a daily writing goal set for yourself? I do not! I just try to write at least a little bit each day if I can, but there’s never a word minimum I try to reach ^^

27. Do you think you’ve improved as a writer since you first started? oh 100% lmao comparing some of my old fics from even a year ago to my fics now is eye opening

28. What is your favourite story that you have written? Shaking in My Skull for sarumi, it’s also the longest fic I’ve ever written and it holds a special place in my heart ; ; For kurotsuki it’s gotta be Let My Love

29. What is your least favourite story that you have written? fuck me, Pencils and Paper LOL it was an earlier sarumi fic of mine and I just...hate it. I’m not even gonna link it LOL

30. Where do you see yourself (as a writer) in 5 years? Still writing fanfic most likely, maybe some original stuff (I hope!)

31. What’s the easiest part about writing? lmao nothing, writing is super hard work, sometimes even just thinking up ideas can be difficult, then there’s actually writing and making the ideas come to life, and don’t get me started on editing lmaooo writers are my heroes

32. What is the hardest part about writing? Finding the motivation, at least for me. I struggle sometimes with it because I’ll have the time and inspiration but depression just kicks my ass every time fff

33. Why do you write? For me it’s super therapeutic, I love the satisfaction of putting hard work into an idea you love and finishing it, and the high that comes with that. Plus sharing the story with others and getting positive feedback is a feeling that can’t be beat. I’ve always loved writing, I love how the possibilities are endless, and I hope I never stop <3

#fic meme #about me #writing meme #tag game #I finally got to do this bc I finished my first final lmao

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kishuajr · 7 years

Text

nobody owns time - lee jihoon

Pairing: Lee Jihoon/Reader

Genre: Fluff

Word count: 3.1k

Synopsis: Jihoon doesn’t like how friendly you and your new co-worker act.

Pt. 1 | Pt. 2

― i’m back! and i wanted to add another part continuing from “hardhearted” PLEASE read pt 1. it’ll make a bit more sense haha :) i hope you like this anyways & i encourage for you to request!! im running out of ideas keke.

i just reread this realized Chan might be mistaken for Lee Chan aka Dino... I’m so sorry for the misunderstand lol i was actually visualizing Chan from A.C.E.. but its ok!

Two weeks.

It had been two weeks since you took Jihoon’s offer on staying in the extra room in his apartment. You both never really saw each other despite the fact you both lived together. He was too busy working on god knows what at some studio and you were too busy looking for a job. You couldn’t help but feel terrible for mooching off of him which led you to want to move out as soon as possible.

Luckily enough, you had found yourself a part time job the other day at a nearby wholesale cooperation. It had good pay and maybe if you worked overtime once in awhile, you would be able to move out of Jihoon’s place by the end of next month.

You spent the day mopping floors, transporting boxes across the store, and restocking the shelves. You looked kind of ridiculous; your small self carrying around stacks of large empty boxes and pushing carts of packaged toilet paper and water. It was also very tiring.

So, when one of your coworkers saw you struggling he couldn’t help but let out a small laugh before walking over to you.

“I almost didn’t see you behind there,” he mused, peering at you behind the stack of boxes you were holding, “You need help?”

He carefully took a few of the boxes from your hands, your fingers brushing and awkward smiles exchanged.

“Just this way,” You called out, leading him down a few aisles and into the front where the cashier stands where. You motioned him to place them down under the conveyor belts so the scanners can use them to pack purchases.

You set down the boxes and sighed in exhaustion, dusting yourself off before finally taking a look at the kind worker.

He had black hair that swooped over his eyes and a friendly, warm smile. He was also tall compared to you, but not as tall as Soonyoung or Mingyu- that’s for sure.

A weak smile played on your lips, “Thank you...Lee Chan?” You say as your eyes sedulously scanned his name tag

Chan nodded, his wide grin showing off his pearly whites, “And you’re (L/N) (Y/N). I’ve heard talk about you in the break room.”

“Really?” Your eyebrows furrowed, “What kind of talk?”

“Don’t worry, all good talk,” He said, his face flushed a light red and you couldn’t tell if it was from exhaustion or from embarrassment, “About how you’re cute and stuff- you know?”

You scoffed, rolling your eyes playfully, “Boys really have way too much time on their hands,” you joke, nudging his shoulder, “When do you get off?”

“The supervisor left a bit ago, so we can leave now.”

“Okay!” You clapped and the both of you began to walk in the direction to the front entrance.

“You must be hungry after carrying those boxes around,” Chan hummed, pushing his hands inside his pockets. It was freezing cold the second you both stepped outside.

“Yeah, I had to skip lunch because I had to work overtime, “ You sighed.

He frowned, but it quickly bloomed into a Cheshire cat like smile, “Hey, do you want to eat at this noodle place that not to far from here? I’ll treat you for getting a new job.”

“Really!” You grinned, “Dumplings too?”

“Two plates! I just got paid this afternoon,” He beamed.

Your grin suddenly faltered as you looked out in the night sky. The sun had already set so it was about 7 o’clock. You knitted your brows, a small ‘tsk’ falling off your tongue, “I would, but I might miss the bus home.”

Chan pouted, grabbing your arm, “Please-e-e,” He said, whining out the last syllable, “Just an hour of your time-”

“Nobody owns time,” A voice scoffed causing you and Chan to look up; well, you looked slightly upwards and Chan looked down.

“Jihoon? What are you doing here?”

The sound of the door slamming shut caused Jihoon to jolt awake. He was at the studio, working on Seventeen’s title song and he must of fallen asleep.

His eyes frantically jumped around the room, finally meeting with an oh-too-familiar 10:10 shaped eyes that belonged to the one and only Kwon Soonyoung.

“Sorry! I didn’t know the door shuts itself,” He sibilated, walking carefully towards the sleepy producer.

Jihoon groaned, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, “What are you doing here? I’m working-”

Soonyoung laughed, wiping the drool off the shorter boy’s bottom lip, “More like dreaming about (Y/N).”

Jihoon rolled his eyes, pushing the younger boy away, “Shut up. How did you know I was here?”

Soonyoung sat on the beanbag chair that was in the corner of the studio. His legs kicked up onto Jihoon’s desk, smacking away on a piece of gum as he shrugged, “Your apartment was empty. Where else would you go?”

“Empty? What do you mean empty-”

The younger boy whinged, burying his head into the palms of his hands, “What’s with all these questions?”

A kick flew to Soonyoung’s ankle causing him to cry out in pain, “Ow, ow, ow!” He whined, rubbing his ankle vigorously.

“Don’t put your feet on my desk,” Jihoon grumbled, sending the other boy a dirty look.

“Gosh, okay! What did you ask again?” Soonyoung huffed, sitting up properly in the beanbag.

“Where’s (Y/N)?”

“She got a part time job! Didn’t you know?”

Jihoon furrowed his eyebrows, “Part time job? What do you mean part-”

The younger boys sharp glared caused the older boy to sheepishly smile and backtrack, “So...Where is she working?”

And thats how Jihoon ended in front of the Wholesales at around nine o’clock at night. It was windy and dark and he couldn’t help wonder why on earth is her boss making her work so late at night. Who knows what could happen while she makes her way home?

She didn’t even have a car.

Jihoon sighed, running a hand through his hair.

How was this girl even getting places? Bus? Subway?

“Please don’t tell me she’s been walking home,” he grumbled to himself.

He suddenly felt bad. He had been sort of distant towards (Y/N) since he was so busy. He never really was home because he spent most nights working at the studio but he did come home around dawn to wash up and change.

Jihoon remembered the first morning, there were two cups of coffee and two plates of breakfast at the dining table.

And as much as he wanted to sit down, Jihoon had no time for breakfast.

So, the next day, she was there with one cup of coffee, one plate of breakfast, one thermos of coffee and one packed breakfast.

Jihoon swore right then that he was in love with her.

Jihoon cringed, smacking his own head, Love? What the hell was he talking about?

He also cursed at himself for standing outside in the freezing cold with no jacket. Why was he here again?

The sound of laughter and footsteps nearing the front entrance caused him to look up.

He smiled, Oh right, (Y/N).

There you were, a sweet and bright smile on your lips. The smile Jihoon missed seeing.

Except you weren’t smiling at him. Instead, you were smiling at some guy- your co-worker(?) and you seemed excited for some reason.

Jihoon’s ears perked up as he made his way closer to the two of you.

“Dumplings too?” You exclaimed.

“Two plates! I just got paid this afternoon,” The taller boy boasted.

And suddenly Jihoon felt his blood boil despite the freezing cold weather.

A date? She wouldn’t.

A sigh flew past your lips, “I would, but I might miss the bus home,” you said in a disappointed tone.

The bus, Jihoon mused, pursing his lips, I knew it.

Please-e-e! Let me just have thirty minutes of your time-”

Jihoon rolled his eyes, “Nobody owns time,” he ridiculed.

The two of them turned to look at Jihoon who suddenly felt subconscious of his height. He couldn’t help but realize how tall the other guy was. Jihoon could feel his ears turn pink but he didn’t dare to back down.

“Jihoon? What are you doing here?” You questioned, your head slightly tilting to the right.

“What do you mean? I’m here to see you,” He tsked, stepping closer to the two.

You couldn’t help but blush, feeling flustered as you turned to look at your co-worker, “I-uh...”

“I’m Chan! Nice to meet you.” He bowed, in hopes for this sudden tension to disappear.

But that only caused Jihoon to cringe at the sight of the taller boy bowing so low. He rose his hand, signalling Chan to knock it off, “You’re going to end up breaking your back-”

“Jihoon!” You hissed, feeling embarrassed from his aloof behavior.

You sheepishly turned to face Chan, rubbing the back of your neck as you winced, “I’m sorry, but since my friend showed up, let’s go eat next time, yeah?”

“Oh! Well, he can join us!”

You grinned, clapping your hands in an excited manner. You turned towards Jihoon, in hopes that he’d quit acting so stiff

And he pursed his lips, clicking his tongue as he stammered, “I-um. I’m allergic to noodles.”

You felt your jaw drop slightly as you stared at him in stupefy.

What on earth is he talking about?

Thankfully for your starving self, Chan was not going to back down. “You can eat something else! They have really good meat dishes too-”’

“Wow... really? That’s amazing,” Jihoon said with a hint of sarcasm that only you caught, “I’m actually allergic to a lot so...”

Jihoon trailed off into silence, blinking as you waved your hands at him, “What are you doing!” you mouthed.

“Who the hell is he?” he mouthed back, nodding over to Chan.

You squinted your eyes, “Go home!”

“Let’s get out of here! Please!”

You harshly glared at your roommate, motioning for him to leave.

Jihoon’s shoulders slumped in defeat and he turned around, starting to walk towards his car but then quickly spinning back around on the balls of his feet, clapping his hands together, “Please-please-please-please-”

Your eyes widened, and you couldn’t help but let the shock contort your features, “Jihoon, I swear to g-”

“Please-please-please-please-please-”

He was so dead.

Quickly clearing your throat, a pitiful smile formed on your lips as you turned to face Chan who stood completely oblivious to what was going on between you and the older male.

“Um, I should probably go. My friend’s kind of... sick.”

Chan pursed his lips, understandably nodding, “Ah- I’ll head out first then. See you tomorrow.”

“We can eat noodles then!” You said in an apologetic tone.

He bobbed his head eagerly before waving goodbye to you and stifling a nod towards Jihoon who was sending daggers to the taller boy.

“Let’s go,” He mumbled, and walked away towards his car and you swore you never been so dumbfounded in your entire life.

The car ride home was silent and remained that way until the apartment door shut behind you both.

“Allergic to noodles,” You mocked with a dry laugh, “Didn’t we just have black bean paste noodles last night?”

Jihoon sighed, unresponsive as he sat down on the loveseat. You repeated his actions, taking his hand in yours; something that felt natural now.

Despite rarely seeing him, when you did, you couldn’t help but hold his hand whilst talking and catching up with him; yearning for skinship.

“Who was that guy? Is he a full-time employee?” Jihoon asked, a hint of annoyance dripping in his tone.

You furrowed your eyebrows, “Mm, I don’t know. I just met him, but he’s really nice.”

He nodded, his eyes not meeting yours but instead, staring at the spot behind you.

“Mhm, okay,”Jihoon said, pressing his lips together, still not meeting your gaze.

“Jihoon, is there something wrong?”

“No.”

“Liar,” you mused.

His sullen pout and odd attitude gave it away. You knew something was up the second you saw Jihoon at your work. How’d he even know where you were?

You shook your head; it didn’t matter right now.

“(Y/N),” Jihoon murmured causing you to look back up at the brunette.

He paused longer than expected and you sat waiting on the edge of your seat, having no clue what he was about to say.

But then he winces, shaking his head whilst rubbing the back of his neck, as if he was trying to figure out what to say.

And suddenly you noticed how red he was getting, the sight of this was too familiar to you. Flashbacks of the night on the staircase replay in your head when he first confessed his feeling.

Is he confessing something?

“I’m sorry that I’ve been so busy lately but just know I’m never busy to spend time with you.”

“Don’t worry about it. I’ve been busy too, you know?” You forced a smile, squeezing his hand, “I’ve been working.”

“Stop talking to that Chan-kid,” Jihoon pursed his lips, “He bothers me.”

You sat there with a pokerface, your brain’s gears slowly churning; trying to connect why on earth would Jihoon have a problem with Chan. He barely met the guy. How can he judge someone so quickly the moment he saw him standing with-

“Are you... jealous?”

Jihoon’s previous sulky countenance immediately transformed into a shocked, maybe even offended expression causing you to stiff a laugh.

“I wasn’t jealous! I was.. bothered,” He uttered.

Your serious exterior finally cracked and a goofy smile appeared past your lips, “I never thought you were one to get jealous,” You chuckled.

Jihoon scrunched up his nose, his ears burning red and his hand that was attached to yours had started to turn clammy.

“I can’t help it!” He suddenly blurted out, “He was grabbing your arm and you both seemed so cheerful- and the fact that you both almost went out to eat!”

Jihoon shook his head, frustrated, “I just don’t like the idea of you out eating noodles with another guy so late at night.”

You frowned as confusion washed over you, “I don't understand how you’re jealous over that when me cuddling with Soonyoung never seemed to bother you.”

“Y-you what?” Jihoon stammered, disbelief written all over his face.

You bit you laugh in attempt to hide your smile, “I’m joking,” you huffed, nudging his shoulder.

But Jihoon didn’t crack a smile. His head dropped down, a blush spreading across his cheeks.

“Hey..” you murmur, “Don’t you remember?”

Jihoon’s breath hitched in the back of his throat as he lifted his head. Feeling his heartbeat pounded in his ears, his eyes met yours.

“I like you,” you say, looking down at your intertwined fingers, “And I understand why you’re jealous, but you don’t have to be. I also understand that you can’t control the way you feel. I’m not telling you to. Just know that I trust you, and you can trust me too.”

Jihoon’s felt the pace of his heart slow down as every word slipped passed your lips. A small and thankful smile flashed on his face as he leaned into you, feeling as if all the stress and tension in his shoulders had vanished.

You wrapped your arms around him, taking in every second of the feeling of his body pressed into yours and inhaling the smell of his shampoo.

“Do you want to be my girlfriend?” he mumbled into your shoulder.

Your eyes widened as Jihoon pulled back slightly; his sweet, chocolate brown orbs melting into yours, “I was planning on asking you in a better way this weekend, but I’m impatient now.”

You giggled, tilting your head to the right as you nodded eagerly causing a warm smile to form on Jihoon’s face.

You watched as his orbs drifted downwards to your lips and your heart fluttered inside your chest when you realized what he was about to do.

His eyes flickered back to yours, as if he was asking “Is this okay?”

But instead of showing him a sign of approval, your eyes flutter shut as you leaned in, brushing your lips against his.

Kissing was sort of new to you and Jihoon. You both had only shared a few pecks so you didn’t expect it when Jihoon didn’t waste time kissing back.

It messy at first, clumsy even. Both of you were unsure but, once your timing had synced, it was slow, soft, and comforting in ways that words could never be. His lips were balmy and minty, and each kiss left your lips tingling and wanting more.

Your hand rested below his ear, your thumb caressing his cheek as both of your breaths mingled.

Jihoon’s hand drifted to your hip, settling there as he pulled you closer until you were practically straddling his lap. You could feel Jihoon’s fingers playing with the tips of your hair before running up and down your spine, sending shivers down your back.

And as much as you wanted for this moment to never end, you both pulled away, breathless.

Jihoon stared at you in awe; your swollen lips and red face caused Jihoon’s heartbeat to quicken. His lips turned upwards into a smug smile, feeling pleased at the fact that he was the one who made you this way; breathless and eyes filled with endearment.

And after a moment of silence, just gazing into each others eyes, you cleared your throat causing Jihoon to blink.

“Do you want to sleep in my room tonight?” you murmured, raking your fingers through the short hair at his neck.

Jihoon rose his eyebrow in surprise, “I think you need to be more clear with what you mean.”

Your eyes widened, smacking his arm playfully, “T-that’s not what I meant!” you stuttered.

He chuckled, tucking a piece of your hair behind your ear as he threw a playful wink, “Sure it wasn’t.”

“Jihoon!”

not edited, but... it’s one am so i think it’s ok hehe :)

you can request here xx

#lee jihoon #jihoon #svt #seventeen #lee jihoon x reader #jihoon x reader #woozi #woozi x reader #lee jihoon/reader #jihoon/reader #woozi/reader #pledis 17 #jealous woozi #jealous jihoon #fluff #jihoon fluff

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