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helly-watermelonsmellinfellon · 1 year

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I'm thinking about the week after my high school graduation. My Christian School was run by a Baptist Church I was a member of and I was in the process of leaving.

I had recently suffered a terrible experience 3 days before the end of school where I was accused of something I didn't do alongside a classmate, threatened with expulsion, and lost my job as church pianist. I got in trouble that only 3 ppl knew about, but that night at prayer meeting, everyone seemed to know I(17 girl) and Sam(19 boy) got in trouble together and ppl assumed we had premarital sex. And my mom raised all hell between school and church, so the pastor/principal called me up to the front after service to talk to me and finally got my side of the story after punishing me severely and NOT asking for my side 8 hours earlier. I wasn't given my job back. Got no apology. And none of them made an effort to fix my reputation that only the pastor, his secretary, or his deacon, could have blabbed about to make me sound like a harlot. And after months of their behavior towards minorities of all sorts making me feel more and more awkward and terrible inside, I decided I would begin the process of leaving. I phased out of that place like a whisper and don't interact with any of them. It's been a decade.

So on this Sunday afternoon prior to evening service, I was sitting in Fellowship Hall with my former HS teacher. She was doing something that involved counting and all I remember was offering to help count despite dreading it(she'd done a lot for me so helping was the least I could do), and then the following incident ruining my numbers and me having to restart.

The secretary, the one who participated in gossiping and slandering me just a week prior, comes up with a clipboard to tell me, "You still owe $400 in tuition, so you'll have to come every Friday for candy-selling until it's paid off."

And I've always hated her ass cuz she has a chip on her shoulder. My mom expressly ordered me to not interact with her as much as I could while still under 18. She is literally annoying af.

The haughty look on her face and the fact that she lied through her teeth in front of my fav teacher... No. I don't have to worry about my behavior at church getting me punished at school anymore. yeah, that was a thing. The rules were BS. Here's a [POST] about my school's student handbook.

"No, I don't," I told her. "Pastor himself, told me in front of many witnesses, including Mrs. Slebodnik here, that I paid it all off and can begin saving for Christian college. He's been collecting that saved up money for me since March, so if you really think I owe hundreds, he has enough in an envelope, and you can just take that."

And she was so blindsided by this because she had a habit of going up to students at random times in the year and telling them they owed [certain number] and had to pay up. Tuition was $125 a month. I was being forced to pay it off since my sperm donor enrolled me and then never paid up.

So I had a $1,250 debt from 8th Gr and that tacked onto when I started candy-selling in the first week of 9th. I was allowed to take about $60 of the overall profit every week through candy-selling and that's $240 monthly for 10 months. So I should have been catching up. And by 12th Gr, I was making about $90 a week as I gained loyal customers who would only buy from me personally. So every month in Senior Year I was getting around $360 from selling candy on Friday alone.

I was doing extra candy-selling on Tuesdays to pay my way through our senior trip to the Bahamas. Since I had to split half of whatever I got with the school, I had to make at least $100 each Tuesday to get at least $50 put away cuz the travel expenses to and back cost more than the cruise itself did. I had 7 months to do this because Pastor couldn't make up his mind what was going to happen. It was hell. I cried a lot. I was the only poor student. Everyone else was selling extra candy for college and I was selling extra so I could at least go on a field trip with my friends for a week. Their parents afforded shelling out $1K+ just fine... and no one wanted to help me. I hated it.

So with this secretary, we came to the assumption that she was pocketing money. I gave you the numbers. A bit of minor math should point out how I was making enough to catch up. If all of 8th Gr cost $1,250 and I make $2400 in 9th Gr, then I paid off 8th Gr and that remaining $1,150 would go toward 9th Gr's debt. Which leaves $100 still owed. So how is it, on New Years Day in 10th Grade(where my monthly earnings from candy-selling had increased even further btw) that was I informed that I was $2K+ in debt?

NYD was Jan 1st. School had been going on for 4 months at that point. $100 from 9th Gr added to the 4 months is $600 even. I was making over $60 a week which is $960 personally earned in those 4 months. So even if you added January's tuition bill to that $600, it would only = $725. So I should have been ahead of the curve. Why was I not?

My mom raised a fuss about those numbers, pointing out with her own math how that wasn't right.

And Ms. Secretary tried that 'you owe money' line with my friend Kali who was super rich and who had Church Leaders for parents and who paid for her tuition, so she didn't have to go candy-selling ever. And her mother did not take that shit lying down.

So I'm just saying... she seems like she pocketed the money.

Anyway, Mrs. Slebodnik went to the Pastor's wife to complain about Ms. Secretary's behavior and since her husband was the oldest serving Deacon of the church, and they made a massive annual donation to the Needy Saints Offering, they couldn't afford to ignore her whenever she had something to say.

I left about a month later.

So yeah, this came to mind and as I'm bitter and love to hate those that deserve it, I had to get this off my chest.

#story time #christians #christian school

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the-demure-abstract · 1 year

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I really hate dating.

Truly.

The most recent disappointment had a lot of potential, but a lot of red flags. Telling me how he reacts during confrontation - he says he gets quiet and will do something petty like drop them off on the side of the road (petty, manipulative asshole) - he says he suffers from depression and anxiety and needs a codependent pet to help him cope (I fucking hated that dirty, mangy mutt) - his cleanliness and ability to cook was suspect at best (our second date, his car was fucking filthy! With trash and dog hair every fcking where, cause his codependent mutt follows him everywhere 🙄) - he "cooked" me a baked chicken that looked fucking raw, with a bunch of veggies thrown on it 🤮🤮🤮 - and with that mutt being everywhere I didn't trust how the food was prepared. And even with these red flags, against my better judgement, and bio clock ticking, I still kept seeing him. However, today, was the last straw (& I'm pmsing) when I sent him the Breakfast Club interview with Dr. Umar. Of all the points that Dr. Umar made, this guy focuses on how Harvard may eliminate race which will eliminate the blacks by 50%; I explain that that may be a blessing in disguise because HBCUS are already underfunded, maybe these 50% students will be forced to patronize an HBCU. Dude disagreed and said that black ppl needed to be at PWIs because major corporations won't hire them if they come from HBCUS. I took a huge issue to this because 1. Dude is African - not black - an immigrant 2. It speaks volumes to the mentality that too immigrants have when they come to America - they try to assimilate and look down on black Americans or our institutions as being less than. After a few minutes of going back n forth I tell him I don't want to discuss the topic because I'm not feeling well (which he knew). Later, we get into another argument about changing his name - he has a very long African name that looks difficult to pronounce - and he says that he's going to change his name to Kevin 🙄. This was my final straw. I spent over an hour trying to explain to him that black Americans don't have the luxury of knowing who they are, or where they come from. Most of us can't trace our lineage past our great grandparents. And here this African guy, whose name holds significant meaning, reverence, culture and ancestral pride wants to change it because 20 years ago he was bullied in high school and is struggling to find another job...I lost it. I called him 'weak' and he sent me a video of Kunta Kinte being whipped, saying he was being whipped by me - and I'm like, Kunta was being whipped for refusing to adopt the name Toby, your uncle Tom ass is begging to be Toby because some black kids in Chicago were idiots?! Like, where the fuck is your pride, courage, and confidence? That shit hit my spirit so hard. I never want to be with a man who is ashamed of his name for something so ridiculous and superficial. I told him that Arnold Schwarzenegger had a ridiculous last name and he made mfers learn that shit! African responded saying Arnold is European 🙄. I hate a weak man.

I hate it, I hate it, I hate it, I hate it!!!

There is nothing more sickening to me and my spirit.

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the-adhd-society · 3 years

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Hello beautiful people !

I wanted to share with you a wall chart that i have been using that has helped a lot.

I am semi recently unemployed and the lack of structure makes it very difficult to get things done.

This is a specific chart that i saw randomly and i cannot remember what it is actually called. Something with a k I think but i am not sure.

If you know please let me know.

I broke down all my tasks into four houses.

1)home/life stuff: dishes, laundry, shopping etc

2)health: doctors apt follow ups etc

3) job stuff: applications,cover letters follow ups.

4) and organization that i volunteer with.

Each task is written on 1/3. A post it note

Everything i need to do fits into one of these houses. Once i have my task and i know where it belongs it goes into the "parking lot"

The parking lot is where everything starts. It says " this is something i need to do but I don't know when yet"

Every night before i go to bed i will look at my parking lot and move two or three things to the next block that says

"Working on it today" ... Which means when i wake up i have three or four clear cut goals that i need to accomplish.

Once they are done i put them in the the done category.

BUT WAIT THERE'S MORE.

I am food and stuff motivated. So each time i complete a task i take it out of the done block and move it to my rewards chart.

Each task is work .50. I have 10 spaces which totals $5. As a treat i will spend my reward money at $5 below. ( it is like 20 blocks away so i wouldn't go there normally).

Once my chart gets filled i put the finished tasks in a mason jar and write the amount on a small post it note.

WHY DOES IT WORK:

it is simple and clear. I know my taks for the day, i know my reward. I get dopamine by moving my task from one box to the done block and again when it is moved to the star chart.

it's ALL VISUAL. I'm not relying on any memory. Everything is there.

IT IS ALWAYS CHANGING: you have to move things everyday. You can't ignore it that way. If you notice that you are ignoring it, change the color of the post its or write down smaller tasks so you can complete them quicker.

It's yours

There is no shame involved. I have tried using other systems created by nt ppl and it didn't work. If it didn't fit Exactly to my needs it was just frustrating or difficult to work with. Then i would feel bad for not being successful.

This system teaches you how to listen and work with your brain. I had to push aside what society told me organization and lables "should" look like. I pushed aside what i "should" be able to do on my own or that a rewards chart for motivation is childish.

Everything on the wall is what my brain needed and everything has a purpose and a space.

Some tips:

1) add what your brain needs and keep it simple. I wanted to add bells and whistles and color code and make times of day. If you NEED all of that do it. But you are setting up a system for your brain to be successful. If there is too much to do. Your brain might just shut down.

2) if you didn't finish a task at the end of the day, put it back in the parking lot. There is no shame in not getting things done here. Look at why it wasn't done and go from there.

3) if a task get returns back to the parking lot undone three times, adjust the task. Break it down into two or three. I needed to call a doctor but it was too much of a task. I broke it down to research, contact (email) and then call.

4) if a task can't be broken down, add more value to it. Each of my tasks is worth .50. If i can't get something "simple" done. I'll make it .75 or a dollar. It's my money and it's my system.

I'm overwhelmed how do i start

1) think about how your brain works this is about working with your brain

2) what will your "houses" be ? : school,job,home ? Chores,social,house,family ? Kids,home,work,me ? What are your four big areas.

3) what is the wording you will use ? What makes the most sense ? To do, doing , done ? Want to do, gonna do,finished ? Make it fun.

If you got this far thank you for reading about my hyperfixation i would love to hear or see what you all have done and if you know what this style is called please tell me. I thought i saved the name.

#resources #add #adhd #adhd help #the adhd society #adhdhelp #organization #adhd brain #motovation #motivation wall

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mg549 · 3 years

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rainbow high but they each have distinct and varying styles

hi im putting my Disscusion under the post cause ik lots of ppl just wanna rb the art but also i have Thoughts

-ruby’s style is the strongest in the series imo. they designed a butch lesbian and nobody told them ig. my only slight change was giving her cowboy boots cause if shes from “the country” then she should... actually... look like shes from the country. maybe its just cause i grew up in nc but i would love some southern rep from a character where being from the south isnt their whole Personality. anyways i think she should wear western style button downs is all im trying to say

-bella... her style is ALL over the place. since she is a set designer i wanted to make her a theatre kid!!! her style is somewhere in the 40s/50s zone of vintage inspired so that way she has a definite Range of styles and silhouettes to choose from! im a sucker for the new look bc its so Shapes but i could also see her pulling off some long wool circle skirts and peasant top blouses! i also gave her some hearing aids and braces which you can probably only see if you zoom in dhjnf

-poppy got the biggest design overhaul of anyone. i kept the butterfly theme and nothing else fbhdjd. since her music has some definite funk energies i wanted to give her a 70s inspired look with some glam platforms and denim overalls! i think we deserve bellbottom pantsuit poppy. i also changed her hair bc literally the rh main cast all have practically IDENTICAL hair styles save for the direction theyre parted in. i wanted to give her those anime butterfly headphones but toned down slightly hdsjdnd oh and! shes also wearing glasses bc once again we get a whole cast of characters and not one of them is wearing glasses like smh literally like half of all ppl wear glasses?? anyways in terms of personality i wanted to keep her bubbly but instead of just making music thru like Divine Inspiration i think she should take a more realistic and nuanced approach!! show her nerding out abt music theory and talking about the themes her pieces represent and the stories they tell

-sunny’s design is Mostly the same! her hair is slightly changed, i wanted it to match the cover she drew for winnerz! i also made the rainbows on her outfit pride flag colors, and gave her some button pins on her jacket! every Token Anime Kid ive ever met has buttons plastered all over their bags and jackets and its a nice touch that gives her some more Character i feel

-jaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaade. jade. i wish she had kept her dark lipstick. and also that she wasnt just billie eilish. and that she was the token goth of the group. her stitched up shirt is inspired by a shirt i wore in high school! it was from the 90s and SUPER beat up to the point where it was literally disintegrating so i just sewed up any new holes that would form with contrasting thread it was a Look. i hc her as wearing contacts bc when she tried wearing glasses she got upset that she couldnt show off her makeup as much gvhbnf! i also gave her a spider necklace bc i think she should still like spiders BUT i HATE the jokes abt “therapy tarantulas” bc only dogs and like 10 horses can actually be service animals and the whole thing w people lying about their untrained dogs/cats (or worse, exotic animals that they should not even own) being service/therapy/emotional support animals just so they can bring them in public is!! Really Bad!! and it hurts people who actually do need service dogs bc untrained dogs are well. untrained and set a bad example for how service animals will actually act! and owners who print out fake certifications also make it harder for disabled ppl bc it leads to store owners thinking that theres some sort of paper they can ask the owner to flash to prove the service dog is trained when that. is not actually true and theres no such thing as an actual certificate for this. if a service dog company offers a certificate/card/whatever to show authority it is specifically for disabled people to do when faced with this issue and has no actual official meaning. and ANOTHER thing that bothers me abt this joke is that.. Therapy For What? it would be really cool to see a canonically mentally ill character as a protagonist for a doll line! it would be fantastic to see them opening up that conversation for neurodivergent kids and their parents! but we have no indication for that at All just haha funy therapy spider :| anyways jade is an nd lesbian my canon now

-skyler is punk now! shes a fashion major and i think it would be a really interesting character to explore, someone who is shy but dresses really flashy and tough! i also changed her theme material from denim to the blue leather she wears at the party bc im biased towards alt fashion. her hair was really fun to design, with a big Cloud of Fluff at the top and long braids underneath bc get it!! its Rain Cloud Shaped :] i dont have much else to say bc this design is def in my Comfort Zone of styles. anyways we stan andershaw here they literally are in love

-vi vi! i didnt change much bc i dooooooont really know that much about influencer/mainstream fashion tbqh... i Did give her That One Halter Top Style that literally 2 other of the main characters are both wearing instead of a loose 1 piece dress tho. i also decided she should be into holographic fabric bc its very Sleek and Future Is Now and Influencercore. i also think the sleek tight fitting holo shirt/skirt is a good contrast to Big Fluffy Fur Jacket. she also has a prosthetic leg idk i just thought it would be a good Touch

overall rh def has some MAJOR problems with diversity in all aspects and it shows in their fashion design as well! if you put the characters in black and white save for a few patterned pieces they would all be interchangeable and i honestly think that its representative of the larger problem! maybe i do follow the monster high design philosophy that every piece should only make sense on the character its from, but the fact that they cant even diversify FASHION despite it being a Fashion Doll Brand really Says It All.

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astralwaifu · 2 years

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Hii congrats on 50 followers!!!! U deserve it!!!!

Also can I have a jjk male matchup???

I go by she/her pronouns, intp and infp (the first two two times I took the test I got these and the third time also said I was a good match with these 2). I'm a November Sagittarius.

I like the light and dark academia aesthetic cuz I find it very calming. I like singing (I've been told I'm a good singer) and playing the piano (still learning). I like drawing sometimes when I'm motivated to do so and I also like to write imagines with characters that I post here. I do like to think that I'm kind and caring and sweet tho sometimes I get like REALLY angry and that's a very bad habit of mine. I procrastinate a lot and I become very talkative once I get to know someone (very shy at first lololol). I can be sarcastic and sometimes curse a lot. I like cool weathers and winters (tho not when it gets very extreme). I also find it sweet when ppl share promise rings or matching necklaces and stuff like that.

I do hope that was enough and congrats again on the milestone!!!

hii! thank you so much <3 for your match-up I originally had someone else in mind, but then inspiration hit me like a train soo….

I match you up with …. (drumrolls)….

Yuta Okkotsu!

HC:

- At first he was too shy to even look you in the eyes, which left you thinking it was your fault, maybe you said something wrong that made him upset?

- Wrong. When he saw you, he was swept off his feet, he was just to timid to talk to you. His flustered face and red cheeks were, however, pretty noticeable (Panda and Inumaki caught on this cues immediately)

- Those two were the ones that set you up - training together, sending you on errands and missions…

- All of their tries to bring the two of you closer, eventually worked out, when you became more comfortable with him. From the awkward silence that settled anytime you were together, to laughing and cursing the higher ups for the latest jobs they gave you.

- However, it took time to get here.

- Yuta never thought of himself as someone worth loving, but when he saw the peaceful and adoring look glowing in your eyes, all his worries and anxiety flew away. The effect you have on him shocked everyone, including the boy himself. He used to be so unsure and shy, but now he became more confident and open.

- You gave him a reason to live again. :)

- If asked what he likes about you, Yuta wouldn’t be able to find his words, since everything you do is perfect to him.

- Maybe it’s your kind and selfless nature. Or the way you never let anyone disrespect your friends or cross the line with you. He likes every little ounce of temper you have. From the carefree, yet thoughtful and observant person, to the explosive and sarcastic sides of you - he loves them all. They were the ones that brought him out of his shell after all.

- Another thing that he loves is how creative you are. He could stay and watch you all day long writing or singing (heavens, he loves when you sing). He wouldn’t mind leaving the dorms all day long if it meant he could spend time with you, simply enjoy your passion. (And to be honest, neither do you)

- He was a little scared about how he was feeling about you. The last time he felt something this intense, Rika became a cursed spirit and that left some scars deep down. As Gojo said - “Love is the most twisted curse of them all”. He would rather die himself than let anything happen to you.

- He was also a little scared of Rika’s reaction, but she sensed through the normal jealousy that you were a good person for him

- After he lost Rika’s ring, he was of course a little stressed and depressed, but if life taught him something it is that there is alwaysa light at the end of the tunnel. It just so happened that you were that light.

- Be prepared for wearing a small golden ring (matching with him) for the rest of your lives. Even if it’s not meant for you to be more than lovers, it will always be a memory of how you saved his life from everything that happened before.

bonus: Song that reminds me of you and yuta - Looking out for you by Joy Again. Poor boy just wants to love you, but he’s too shy to admit it.

#jjk headcanons #jjk #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk matchups #jujutsu kaisen matchups #yuta okkotsu

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desertsongpdf · 3 years

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vv intrigued about your city now because I like drama actually

thank u for the ask anon this is the post 🙏 im going to spill the beans. (also i wont say ppl's names because if u like... look them up on instagram u'd figure out where i live so 😬) most of the drama is about 14-18 yr olds because... idk

the 16 yr olds here are insane. almost all of them have 5k+ followers on instagram, they do endorsments???? everyone seems surprised that they;re only 16.... one of them ******,, almost got pregnant and everyone found out in less than a day????? i didnt even know who she was and i heard abt it too... her boyfriend makes music and its on spotify theres literally indie bands who rnt on spotify and he is 16 and his music is on spotify . they are that rich.

one of my close friends is (somehow) involved in EVERYTHING and he tells me stuff for no reason. everyone is obsessed with dating etc etc . my friend told me today that she was actually in a borderline abusive relationship and she forgot to tell us? and she's 15. i-. (she broke up w him finally shes fine now)

ALSO everyone is a pedo here. idk if its just some ppl but theres like a bunch of 17, 18 yr olds who ONLY date 14, 15 yr old girls. i just, dont interact with them but its hard not to hear abt it because everyone knows everyone.

the bars here are another story. there's this place ********* and thats the "it" place. kids sneak out there all the time (im going next week ikik hypocrite). it's like a drive-in bar type thing. they just sell cigarettes and beer to kids? and all the street fight stuff happens there. ppl just piss each other off and then they're like "ok we'll fight on this day at *********. and they each call a bunch of ppl and those ppl call more ppl. normally there's a crowd of almost 40-50 ppl there to watch.... this one girl who i somewhat know.. it was her birthday last week and she invited 80+ ppl and they all went to a bar and it took so long for me to figure out that they all went to the same place on the same day coz there were too many ppl so they all got separated into grps.

im not .. pissed off by all of this? i also go to ******** and hang out w ppl.... the part that pisses me off is that they're all figure obsessed (im p sure some of them have ed's) and makeup obsessed and they're only 14, 15, 16?

#theres more im probably mising something #this was theraputic thank u anon #i hope.. u enjoyed?#asks #anon

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sanchoyo · 2 years

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Tag game!

Let’s get to know our Animanga Fandom mutuals/followers better?

Tagged by @spectralreplica ^^ tyyyy <3

01. How did you find out about anime?

I mean I watched sailor moon/dbz as a very little child, then ygo a bit later. I think tokyo mew mew was the first one I realized was 'anime' and realized that anime was a separate thing from other cartoon shows? it was my childhood best friend who I met bc we both liked w.i.t.c.h that told me abt mew mew and winx on 4kids when we were like 9-10. I owe her everything 😭

02. What’s your favorite anime?

tmm or ygo have always been my comfort series (if im gonna be specific, ygo s0 and ygo zexal) I would call them my favs simply for the comfort and nostalgia factor, I've seen ones that could in a technical sense be considered 'better' if u take into account animation/plot/characters, but...i LIKE those ones. theyre charming... (also, bnha is the manga ive kept up with the longest which is impressive given my attention span, and written the most for which makes me feel like it deserves a mention, but I prefer the manga to the anime by a longshot and this question specified 'anime', so...)

03. Do you have a favorite J-music/K-pop group/singer?

not really? sometimes I listen to older kpop like girls' generation or 2NE1 but I couldnt tell you anything about any of the members of either or name more than 1-2 songs :') I don't really keep up with ANY musicians/bands consistently in general sajdhfk

04. When is your bday? And how old are you?

its may 30th ^^ mid 20s

05. Currently, what is your favorite fandom anime?

uhh for fandoms specifically? I've been loving seeing all the tmm fanart lately since the new anime trailer dropped <3 bnha fandom is really good at engaging with my stuff which I LOVE, some ppl are very very nice in the tags or comments ;w; I stay 50 ft away from the main tags myself tho, bigger fandoms means worse takes </3 I love my lil tiny circle of friends for fandom stuff <3

06. Despite the ups and downs of Tumblr, what motivates you to stay here today and do your best?

I like the Atmosphere, and how 'old web' it feels?? it has a lot of features no other website has...feels homey

07. Finally create it yourself in this picrew:

Link

close enough. the ✨vibes ✨ are there 😭

Tagging @bananaapplewaffle @mewmizu @thechampionofjerkwall @shopkins only if u guys want to tho!! no pressure :3

#sanchoyorambles #ty for the tag!!! these are always fun ^^

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kicksaddictny · 3 years

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Kicksaddict Sneakerhead PROFILES Interview Series: @CakedaGawd

After a long Hiatus, we’ve returned! Our popular Profile series has been requested almost on a daily basis (Thanks for the tweets, dms and emails). We were even threatened! (Thanks by the way).

Cake The Gawd! This one was so much fun. Tap in.

Where are you from? Brooklyn, NY born in Crown Heights raised in East Flatbush.

How long have you been collecting sneakers? I was introduced to sneakers in 1991 but I started collecting for myself in 98.

What’s your favorite sneaker and why? Air Jordan 6 Infrared. It's the shoe Michael was wearing when he won his first championship, and to me just it’s just the most beautiful Jordan shoe to date! The silhouette is unmatched, it is timeless, and no matter how many times it is retroed I will buy it!

Besides your hometown, what is the best city for sneakerheads that you know of? Why? I would say LA 100% !! It is a vibe out there. I am part of a sneaker group and 75% of the people in there are from LA. They really about the culture they know their shit and they are fresh as fuck too.

Do you collect just for collecting or do you collect and rock? I collect and rock. That is why I double up on certain shoes.. Some kicks you gotta have for store and show but some you just have to rock them!

What sneaker got you into the sneaker game? I cannot pinpoint one thing, it is so many things. It was Music, my parents introducing me to Nike, my older cousin, basketball, the dope boys around the way, and my 3rd grade crush and her cousin who both had Aqua 8's. (LOL) I cannot just say 1 thing because they all had a significant part in it.

What are your thoughts on these fake celebrity sneakerheads? I hate them all! All of these dudes just get perks, some of them do not even know the shoes. That shit really gets under my skin. Showing off shoes that they get and not even knowing the name or numbers of the shoes, creating their own names. Shit is sickening. S/O to the Sneaker Gawd Wale !

How do you feel about the Off white collabs? I liked the first round of the collabs. With the Presto's, Air maxes, Blazers, and Jordan 1's. I think after that it should've been left alone. But I can respect what they are doing over there. I just won my first pair of Off-White's with the Lot 50 joint.

If you could wear only one sneaker for the rest of your life, what would it be? Air Jordan 3 Black Cement. Yes 6's are my favorite of all time but the Black Cement 3's just go with EVERYTHING!

What advice would you give as far as storing and preservation of your sneakers? Wear your kicks man. I store and rock! I get it, wanting to save shoes but putting them away and never rocking them, when you finally do ya it’s separating and crumbling. In order for your kicks to last they gotta be worn anyway. Unless you're truly just on some collecting only for show vibes.

What is the most you’ve ever spent on a pair of sneakers? $900... I was able to land Black and Red and Royal 1's from 2001 together. A friend of mine had them and said he couldn't think of anyone else. I had literally just started my new job. A chunk of my first check went to that pick up.

Have you ever waited in line for a pair of kicks? I waited in line once in my life for shoes and swore I would never do it again. It was for the 2001 True Blue 3's. I waited online at like 7 in the morning at Kings Plaza. LMAO I said this will never happen again. I didn't have the patience for it. I do not know how ppl used to do that shit or camp for kicks. I was there for 1 hour and I was like this is ridiculous.

You're also a photographer, how long have you been taking photos? I have been taking photos since 2011 but officially became a photographer in 2013.

How do sneakers play a role in your photography? That is a great question because I didn't want the 2 to mix at all. Because I'm a scenery and landscape photographer. But I got into photography because of sneakers. No offense to anyone but a bunch of these "influencers" get on IG with their DSLR cameras, take some on foot shots and call themselves "Photographers". 90% of them do not even understand lighting. I didn't wanna be one of those guys because I actually live this and study it. But recently I just started letting it be that and owning it. I am nice with this photography shit when it comes to sneakers. I have a deep connection with shoes and I love incorporating that into my art. I thank my wife for that. I told her I don't wanna be just another sneaker photographer and she said to me who said you have to be ?! I took that and ran with it. Off-White just recently featured some of my pictures on their Instagram.

I remember you saying you're a sneaker enthusiast, what is the difference between that and a sneakerhead? An enthusiast really studies sneakers. Sneakerheads just love sneakers like it ain't really about the history and all that for them. They just love shoes because it is cool and makes them feel good. Us Enthusiasts are invested. Things matter like knowing years of a shoe. For example, an enthusiast would look at a pair of Jordan's like Taxi 12's, We know Michael wore those in the 1996 - 97 season, but we also know that Martin gave away a pair on his show for the Christmas episode to the kid who had holes in shoes. They are tied to iconic moments. A sneakerhead may love Bordeaux 7's because they are dope looking shoes. Where for me it's that Michael Jordan wore those in a video with Michael Jackson and Kris Kross in the 92 Jam video. MJ and MJ in a video with Kris Kross, do you know what that did to my childhood?! Give you one more example that is not even Michael Jordan related. Piggy backing off of Kris Kross,The Patrick Ewing’s were one of my favorite kicks growing up besides seeing Pat play in them one of my favorite Hip Hop covers of all time is "Totally Krossed Out" and Kris Kross is wearing both colorways. So you see what I mean there is so much tied to it with being an enthusiast. This is just my opinion though some may not agree so don't shoot me! (Ha)

From the time you started collecting up until now, would you say that the sneaker game changed for the best or the worst? I have been collecting for 20 plus years now. I have seen the game at it's best, I have seen it die, I have seen it revive, and now I am witnessing the death of it again. The sneaker game is disgusting right now, and I honestly do not think it will ever recover. It really saddens me. It is a popularity and money contest right now.

Does pricing affect your collection? Hell No! And I hate that some people are trying to make this the norm. IDGAF if you paid $500 - $2000 for a pair, It doesn't mean shit. The narrative is getting outta hand.

What does the word “Hypebeast” mean to you? Hypebeast is a person that only buys shit for status and popularity. They cannot form their own opinion about shit. They have to wear and cop items based on what every celeb is wearing or whatever these Social Media "Influencers" are saying is hot! It is not only sneaker related either. N*ggaz were hypebeasting for PS5 last year..

What are your thoughts on the females in the sneaker game? They are the best! I wish we had a Sneaker union and it was only run by females! The men in this game are annoying and so over the top. It is so bad that they feel the need to compete with women. The men get shoes just to show off to one another. Like what type of shit is that? The females are cool. I had a dude on twitter tell me women don't know the value of a shoe let alone about the shoe. The men feel like they always gotta try to shit on the women. The women are just trying to be part of the culture and enjoy it. And they shouldn't have to try to be part of something that is open to anyone who is willing to be invested and understand the culture.

Any advice for a young kid coming up in the sneaker game? Wear what you like! Respect the game and the people who have been doing it before you. Because this new generation of sneakerheads are little entitled dicks. No respect whatsoever!! I don't care about Travis Scott shoes. Without Jordan being who he is Travis wouldn't have a Jordan silhouette to collaborate with! Same with Off-White. These silhouettes were here before these guys. Say know your history and pay homage!! BUT STAY humble.

See I follow you and I'm loving the way you include your daughter in your work, what does that mean to you? Man, it is beautiful!!!! Without even trying she is invested in the culture. Both photography and shoes. Myself and my wife are both heavy into photography, art, music, sneakers, and clothes. My daughter is into all the same things but we are letting it be her own experience. We are not forcing anything on her. We want her to enjoy being a child and whatever things she picks up from us along the way is just a bonus. But I love shooting her, and I love when she asks myself and her mother "do we like her fit". It is truly a blessing man!

All photos by CAKEDAGAWD

Follow : https://twitter.com/CakedaGawd

https://www.instagram.com/whatsinthesyrup/

#Kicksaddict #cake #photographer #cakedagawd #airjordan #airjordan1 #airjordan6 #clothing #baby #infrared #airjordan4

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sereniv · 3 years

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@tea-withnofixinsplease tagged me

1. why did you choose your url

It's kind of lame, but

I was following this mental health blog yeaarss ago, and someone who was considering suicide said that no one would remember them. And they signed their message as Serenity. and idk for some reason I made that a username in reference to them. but serenity was already taken, so I added a V at the end for Vegan because I didn't want to think to much on it. So technically it'd be pronounced (sare-en-ih-vee) but I pronounce it (sare-en-eev) but it can be said either way

2. Any side blogs

Yeah I have like 7 or more idk 9

3. How long have you been on Tumblr

Too long. 10 years maybe. But I've had to remake this one because I accidentally deleted my last main.

4. Any Queue tags

Nope. I dont Queue. I show up, reblog 50 posts, and then leave

5. Why did you start your blog

I was told there was a cosplay picture of me on here, so I made an account to reply to the person who posted it (positive). It was a Hanna's not a boys name cosplay. It's not good lol

6. Why did you choose your icon

In solidarity and support of Black Lives Matter

It was a little drawn Coyote blogsona before. I'd like to change my icon again but I'm lazy and idk what to

7. Why did you choose your header

People called me Coyote years ago because of a meme, and it stuck. And I was associated with aliens and illuminati I guess?? I honestly can't remember who I used to be. But I photoshopped it all together for my header and just never changed it for like 8 years

8. What is your post with the most notes

The Indigenous coffee post has most notes for this year

9. how many mutual do you have

I have no idea

10. How many followers do you have

I dont wanna check

11. How many people do you follow

I dont want to check

12. Have you ever made a shitpost

Of course

13. How often do you use tumblr

It consumes my life bc I have nothing to do ever

14. Did you have a fight with another blog

Probably years ago

15. How do you feel about "you need to reblog this" posts

I used to make them now I hate them. If it's asking, or suggesting or explains why it's important to reblog then that's fine. But if it outright says to reblog, usually in a judging tone I don't. Because it always is the assumption that I don't care if I don't reblog it and that's never the case.

16. Do you like tag games

Not really but I'm fine with being tagged since not a lot of ppl do it

17. Do you like ask games

I think they are fine? I mean I like getting legit asks

18. Which one of your tumblr mutual do you think is famous

I am all their biggest fan lol. Idk I don't think any

19. Do you have a crush on a mutual

Nope

20. Tags.

Anyone who wants to!

#tag game #tagged in #suicide mention

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agustdiv1ne · 3 years

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thank you + milestone!!

damn, never thought we'd get here, did we?

in all honesty, it's been a pretty shit year. march 'til now has felt like the same month on repeat with tiny tweaks to make it all so much worse. but i'm not here to complain about the worst parts of this year, i'm here to celebrate the best ones.

this was the year that i finally started writing, that i was finally spurred to open a google doc and just type away until a tiny work of fiction stared back at me. my first one was 1k words, a rant to get all of my emotions off of my chest with an idol as my muse. it felt...great, though it also felt a bit odd writing after being an avid reader for years. i always did prefer essays to creative writing, but this year definitely changed that perspective.

i wrote that first blurb along with another fic in late july, and in early august, i asked my friends if i should post them. om august 3rd, i changed this blog from a fic rec to a fic writing blog just like that. i regret none of it.

it's been nearly five months since i revamped this blog and i couldn't be more grateful for the support i have gotten from all of you, whether it be a kind comment, a like, a reblog, all of it. i never thought anyone would like my content, but i've been proven severely wrong by this community. from my irls that are on here, to my lovely mutuals and followers, to those i've talked to a lil bit on this hellsite, to the writers whose fics i absolutely adore, to those who have left a like or a comment on one of my fics, i want to say thank you from the very bottom of my heart ♡

have a happy and healthy new year! i love and appreciate every single one of you!!

though i'm painfully bad at writing letters and getting all sappy, i wanted to write them anyways hahaha let's goooo

to @hwaddict:

my irl best friend!! my partner in crime!!!! i love you sm carly, and there are not enough words in this world for me to describe the extent of my love. you have been there for me during my lowest moments, you've seen me cry, and i don't cry in front of many ppl. i trust you with my life and i'm so glad that we became friends back in middle school bc you are one reasons that spur me to keep going. i can't wait to see where life takes us and know that while i might not always be able to be there physically (especially with college right around the corner), i will always be there for you in any way i can be. again i love you and i can't wait to conquer next year with you ♡♡

to @hopejanaee:

hope!! hobi!!! one of my irls! though we just became friends earlier this year, it feels like we've been friends for ages. it's crazy how close we grew so quickly but i am so grateful to have you in my life. you never fail to make me laugh whenever we're together and you're so chaotic but in such a good way hahaha. you were the one who got me into writing with your own wonderful fics so thank yoi for that. i'm so happy that we became friends because you're so kind and caring and ahhhhhh i love u sm ♡

to @oikawasmilkbread:

we talked for like 0.2 seconds but you are so kind and hella cool!! it was nice having random conversations with you and i'm so glad you randomly dmed me bc i am shy and i have 0 idea how to start conversations with anyone lmao. i always smile when i see you in my notifs! i hope you have a happy new year!!! ♡

to @luthenia:

i know you're on hiatus but seeing you in my notifs always excites me hahaha. we never talk but you are so supportive of everyone in this community and i just wanted to shout you out for that! your memes are top tier LMAO and i can't wait for when you come back, happy new year ♡

to @starsforten:

we also talked for approximately 1 second but it was so fun talking to you about astrology stuff (virgo sun libra rising gang hahahaha) and those teuta matoshi dresses! you are so nice and easy to talk to and i hope your new year is happy and fruitful! ♡

i recommend every single one of these blogs for their amazing content!! i added some of my favorite fics as i'm a whore for great writing hahaaaa

@kinktae

waterloo — a masterpiece! taehyung is so bitter at the beginning and it's adorable seeing how y/n breaks his tough shell. loved this from beginning to the end ♡

hot rod — the 50s slang, the dynamic between hoseok and y/n...*chef's kiss*

@untaemedqueen

welcome to seoul land — werewolf!namjoon really got me going, 100/10 would recommend

graceful gods — this is one of my all-time favorites, greek god!jungkook has my brain going brrrr

@shadowsremedy + @therealmintedmango

support system — adorable!! this is a hybrid!yoongi fic i really enjoy, and the series isn't over yet! check it out~

@bratkook

tear you apart — demon!taehyung...holy shit. i was speechless

@tatertotthethot

the doms next door — THIS SERIES OMG, i've read each part at least five times already. taekook got me acting UP

scream (posted to @yandere-society) — a really cool take on the movie scream with jungkook, yandere fics don't always appeal to me but this one absolutely did

@ateezmakemeweep

broken — the immense ache i felt in my chest while reading this, but i loved both parts with a burning passion. san is so sweet in this :')

@atinybrew

dirty free for all — the ULTIMATE demon!san fic. the writing is absolutely immaculate and this is the first fic that had me blushing down my mf ARMS

rice milk lattes and bryophytes roads — another san fic admittedly because i'm whipped for san lol. anyways, this was cute and hot at the same time and best friend!yunho made my double biasing ass that much happier

@seacottons

pan — an adorable peter pan!hongjoong fic, it had my heart going achhfhsjfjsjf

sir kiss me — circus au with san holy hell i loved every twist and turn of this

@actuallythatwaspromise

bad romance — one of my favorite yunho fics ever, punk rock!yunho x nerd!reader has my entire heart

aurora garden center and desire ink — florist!mingi had me uwuing for the entire fic, this was adorable and i loved it sm

@yeonjuncore

every single fic on this blog is an absolute masterpiece, i swear

the devil's little angel — THIS IS ONE OF MY ULTIMATE FAVORITES, demon!yeonjun had me screaming and it was just so fun to read and i loved every single second of it so much that i've read it nearly ten times now. so go read it, you won't regret it!

the boy with the horns — another of my ultimate favorites (i told you, their writing is just that amazing), woodland fey!soobin just had me going so soft :(( i literally sobbed at one point, that's how invested i was

bleeding heart — the tension between vampire!yeonjun and vampire slayer!reader had me screeching

curtain call — i have a sad crush vampire!soobin

i love you, always — this felt so..bittersweet? taehyun loves y/n so much, i lowkey cried while reading this

@angelfic

the art of (mis)communication — i am a whore for both reconciliation and yeonjun, 100000/10 pls read this i beg of you

@angelictaehyun

growing pains — ahhh once again a yeonjun fic, my chest hurt a lil bit at some points but it was so sweet!!

@neovisioned

bed of spiderwebs — spiderman!mark has my heart screeching, i loved every second of it ♡

eddie ate dynamite — johnny suh coming for my throat yet again

cupid victorious — cupid!jaehyun :'))) definitely one of my favorites!!

@domjaehyun

quarantine chronicles — ok if you haven't read this or the part two yet then you're missing out big time!! the tension, the buildup, every single part of this fic was just *chef's kiss* but multiply thay by a million

all these years — every single moment of this felt so nostalgic and the ending was so sweet :')

@caiuscassiuss

muse — i keep going back to this one constantly, the angst in this phenomenal and i love artist!taeyong sm here

@neoct-zen

loverboy — HOT, AMAZING, I SCREAMED. the blurbs that accompany this are also top-tier i recommend reading each and every one!!

@moondustis

pink + white — i'm so soft for mark i stg, this was the cutest thing ever

@loviejaehyun

can't avoid this feeling — hockey player!mark is the best thing ever

all tied up — i just- screamed as i read this bc professor!jaehyun is too hot goodbye

@hopejanaee

incapable — this is one of the best yoongi fics i've ever read ngl, it's not completed quite yet but the parts that have been posted are top tier!!

breathless — THIS. I LOVED THIS. yuta is just so hfjshhfhshfnsn and i love this sm

@hwaddict

melting point — big boy mingiiii, 100/10 would recommend

@okayau

house next to mine — frat boy!yeonjun rly got me going, cute and hot at the same time ahhhhbfnsnnf

youth — ADORABLE, yeonjun's confession is peak i love it here

run away — how many yeonjun fics can i fit in this post? (answer: a lot) definitely one of my favorite harry potter aus!! it was awesome seeing how their relationship changed throughout the years and perhaps i teared up a little at the end :'))

@starrychannies

baby steps — ONE OF ALL-TIME MY FAVORITE FICS ON THIS SITE, every single part is so well-written and ahhhhhfhdhhf chan makes me feel some type of way

my stupid — another yeonjun fic! angsty but v cute at the end :')

@baekhvuns

this youth of craziness — 40k words of pure gold, this fic is absolutely one of my favorite san fics ever!!

replacement — prince!ten makes my brain go brrrr, i love how the y/n just speaks her mind here

@masterninjacow

untitled project — i saw soulmate au with mark and i knew would already love it, and i did! pizza boy!mark at that, amazing and i adored it

more amazing blogs!!: @galaxteez, @poutybinz, @lustjoong, @bloominghigh

these are just a few of the fics and blogs i found this year, find more on my fic rec blog @agustdiv1ne-recs!! (my thumbs are starting to hurt i'm so sorry bfjshfhsh)

wrapping up each month since august since that's when i actually started posting LMAO

☆ august

03: good enough — chan

03: bloodsucker — seonghwa

04: cutie — san

09: veloxrotaphobia — mingi

19: want — changbin

21: numb — yunho

100 follower special — i reached 100 followers towards the end of august, my first ever milestone :') also my first ever time taking requests, 'twas very fun ♡

☆ september

03: on camera — jungkook

☆ october

27: oh, worm? — namjoon

31: demon days — san

☆ november

10: a letter to my love — xiaojun

23: bad for u — jaehyun

27: home sweet home — yeonjun

☆ december

christmas bash 2020 — my brain went hey what if you did this- and i listened so here's 17 holiday fics hahahaa (not all of them are out yet but i'm working on it!!)

things i plan to release in 2021!!

☆ sunflower — jimin

☆ cross — yeonjun

☆ landslide — seonghwa

☆ nice save — san

☆ red — hyunjin

☆ a secret series (that will be revealed once i plan everything) — ateez

☆ 4 unrelated secret fics oOoOoo — will i reveal them? you'll just have to wait and see ;)

there will definitely be more posted! these are the ones that are going to be my priority at first, but my imagination is always churning so expect a lot more :)) check out all of non-secret wips here!

i hit 500 followers a couple days ago! i nearly screamed when i saw that LMAO. thank you so much for liking my content because i work hella hard on it :') sometimes i feel like i don't deserve y'all really, but @hwaddict will yell at me if i say that so ig i take it back hfhshhdhg

a post for celebrating this milestone will come as soon as i finish up the rest of my christmas fics!! sorry that i'm so slow :( (hint: my requests will be open, so look out for it!)

so yeah!! that's it, sorry for the painfully long post (i'm sorry to my thumbs for typing this whole thing out </3). thank you to everyone who read this far!! i hope everyone has a happy and healthy new year, and in the words of txt's cover, fuck 2020. may 2021 be a much better year for all of us!!!

much love,

ashlee ♡

#i'm sorry if i missed anyone :((#j know i love and appreciate u a lot #it's j my thumbs are literally cramping up as i type this :(#2021 celebration!#happy new year y'all #lmk if any of links are wrong bc i will fix them asap

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tokugou · 3 years

Note

Hi. First: I love your GIFs! They're pleasing to see on my dash (and sometimes gives me niggling ideas for creating GIFs of my own but almost never do it cuz procrastination and my creativity sucks haha 😅)! Please keep creating! <3

Second, genuine question (and out of curiosity): Why do you self reblog your posts often? People can see your posts on their dash, and even on the search thingy. The search thingy doesn't let people see your self-reblogs (just the original post). Even though I've kinda been on and off of Tumblr for years, I don't really get how it works, so I'm a bit confused as to why you and other bloggers self-reblog your/their own posts?

You don't have to answer if you don't want to, though! I'm just genuinely confused and I don't know who/where else to ask/search 😅. Thanks in advance! Have a nice day! <3

I honestly don't know what I did to get dragged into this discourse

Thank you for polite question, I honestly don't know if I can help you a lot and if my answer will explain it as you expect. I also was on and off tumblr for a long time and often, but I can answer it based on my own experience on this becasue it was confusing to me too when I first met with self reblogging.

Long reply under read more so to not trash other people' dash

first of all self promotion isn't a bad thing and i'm staring to think some of people here see it as a crime

compared to old one nowday t/mblr is a mess, lot of people left this site and most of them were content creators (either artists or gifmakers) and back then it seemd more welcoming to editors? People would rb your stuff no matter your popularity becasue hey it is content from my fav series i wanna see more i wanna keep it on my blog and show it to others so there was no need for people to self reblog becasue it circulated around a lot on its own.

new people who join this app are raised on i/stagram t/itter and/or f/book where LIKES means everything, you show your support by liking posts THIS NOT APPLY TO TUMBLR AND NEVER DID [you can check this amazing post about rebloging]. As nice as it is to get likes on your post becasue it is like a pat on a head - it is only a pat, doesn't mean anything on a long run. Reblog = spreading. If people don't spread it we stay unnoticed and we tend to self reblog more.

another thing that changed is: people no longer scroll from top to the last post they saw before going to sleep, cos why would they? You wake up in the morning open app while eating breakfast or drinking coffee and you sroll past ten or twenty post or an equivalent of hour or two of your absence - you dont go deeper cos it would be a waste of time - again, I say USUALLY, some ppl still do this and it is ok either way - which leads us to main point of self/reblog:

DIFFERENCE in TIME ZONE not all of our followers live in the same time-zone, when I post something in my free time it doesn't mean others have it too, most of them are probably sleeping or in working place at that hour. We self reblog so people who were absent (and we think might be interested in - becasue why not? they follow us for a reason right?) can see it when they get back on here. By reblogging ourself multiple times, that puts the post back on the follower’s dash and hopefully gives them a chance to see it.

most of people follow ton of blogs (one of my friend I met here told me they follow over 1k blogs) imagine even half of these blogs posting regulary, a few things per hour, the dash is messy and crowded OUR EDITS TEND TO GET LOST IN IT. Most of people follow a lot of blogs and might miss our posts becaue their dashes are WAY more active than these who follow five or ten blogs.

t/mblr fandoms aren't welcoming to new creators in my experience, to get notes you need to be popular/have lot of followers but you can't have lot of them if your posts aren't spread/seen and so on and so on it go in circle (a lot of ppl also only reblog popular posts and avoid these with litte of notes - don't know why it is like this, maybe they think these posts are suspicious?) so with self reblog we also give some of these fake notes to make a post more appealing, i guess? this one is just speculation.

the search function you mentioned is very rarely used tbh people don't go to search for things daily, they usually only do this when they join new series/ship/etc to check if there is something. People usually stick to what they see on their dashes. AND most importantly this option doesn't work as it should. It is some type of algoritm that promote post that are alive/active - even if your post is relativy new it might not show in search becasue it died quickly (as if it wasn't interacted with for some time). With search option it is 50/50 your thing either show there or not. ALSO REMEMBER search option is a terrible promoted thingy that doesn't show you everything so you better stick to /tagged/ thing you can enter manually while on dash if you are using web t/mblr.

people no longer go straight to specific blogs to check if they missed something, they might do it for their besties (as they call it) but other than that DASH is all people see and focus on, so the more often content creators self/reblog the higher chance followrs will see it.

we are not paid for what we do and it come to everything: edits, gifs, arts, writing, video and META POST we are not paid for it and no matter how many people say notes are just numbers these numbers are our motivational payment, the less you get the less you create because you just don't feel the point of sharing your creations if it is not received well or at all.

when I started posting I used to post new content daily even twice a day, nowdays seeing most of my edits not being well recieved in fandom I lost motivation to the point I was thinking of quiting because it didn’t give me joy anymore and I'm still considering it.

I personally never felt bothered seeing self rebbloged post, I follow a bunch of content creators, some of them sr twice a day some each hour, some more or less often. It often helped me to see something I would missed becasue I wasn't here and personally it often give me joy to see the post I remember seeing that had 2 notes when I rb it and now it is 500 or more.

to anyone who read it and still think self reblog is a bother: do not tell people to stop self reblogging. If you genuinely have a problem with self reblogging, just unfollow or block the person who does it and don’t make a fuss over it!

I hope I managed to answer you at least partly? I probably lost the point somewhere between first sentence and second but... well

#chloe.mailbox #long post #anonymous #i keep saying WE as in content creator but honestly i dont feel as if i was part of it

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letterstomilen · 3 years

Text

i discuss the classification of igneous petrology as you fall asleep during my lecture (PART 1) (ASMR)

Childe/Zhongli, Alternate Universe (read part 2 here) When Childe's younger sister tells him about the volunteer at the library, he does not make the connection between that and his new favorite ASMR YouTuber, Rex Lapis.

Childe has a very effective method of getting through college. His little sister, who’s caught him making coffee at three in the morning on more than one occasion the past week alone, would beg to differ.

“You’re the best older brother,” she starts off, and he’s sure she’s trying to convince herself more than him at this point, “but you need to fix your sleeping habits.” Then, because she’s his little sister, she’d flash him a smile and pat his shoulder reassuringly.

(The comment is not lost on him though. He understands his sleeping situation will eventually wear him down if it hadn’t already, but he believes if he’ll drink a coffee every morning and a Monster every night, he’ll get through three days. By the third day, he’ll hardly be coherent but that doesn’t matter because he’ll conk out for the next twelve hours and then repeat.)

“Don’t worry, Tonia,” he says, trying to sound as reassuring as possible as he contemplates whether it’s worth it or not to swallow a pill of 5-hour energy with his morning coffee. “Once break ends, I’ll get back to normal.”

“You said that six seasons ago.”

Childe frowns, trying to remember if his sleeping schedule was this dysfunctional last year. “Huh?”

“The Walking Dead seasons,” Tonia clarifies, as if she’s not twelve years old and the show is for grown adults. He thinks. He hasn’t checked Commonsensemedia ever since La Signora labeled him as a “helicopter parent” and his Netflix tab has been playing How to Get Away with Murder as background noise for the past few weeks.

Isn’t it a show about zombies though? Tonia’s sheepish smile tells it all, because it’s the same exact guilty look he had when he got caught red-handed as a kid.

(Once he remembers later, Childe promises himself, he’ll check out The Walking Dead.)

“Oh. Well. I have a lot of shows to catch up on, you know. Not to mention a ton of my professors gave me reading for over the break.”

A half lie. They did give him a lot of reading because each professor assumed that their classes were his only one, and with seven days left, he still has a textbook worth of reading to go through. But there are no shows that Childe would sacrifice his precious sleep for. As a matter of fact, he would love to sleep. He’s spent the majority of his classes back in high school sleeping and faking attention, saving his grade at the last minute — it was quite the extreme sport really, if he says so himself.

Whenever he tries to sleep recently, his thoughts run at several hundred miles per hour, and he spends several hours staring at the ceiling before succumbing to the computer at his desk and watching trashy movies. At this point, he must have gone through the entire romance comedy list on Netflix. (Not a proud point in his life but if anybody ever wanted him to give a list of best to worst romance comedy movies, he now has one.)

Tonia, on the other hand, isn’t incredibly convinced.

Admittedly, the excuse was lame. Also, he can’t easily lie to his little sister, who’s far shrewder than he takes her for at times.

“You never start your reading in advance. You like to speed read it right before your class or watch a five-minute video on the chapters while your teachers take attendance. But that’s… uh, ‘a bad work ethic.’” Tonia looks immensely proud of herself as she says this, finishing it off with, “Zhongli told me that.”

“Zhongli?” he repeats, trying to remember if that’s one of her classmates or some stranger that’s hoping to kidnap his sister.

“The guy that volunteers at the library sometimes. He recommended me a loot of good books to read, but he talks like an old man.”

“How old?” Childe can tell she’s enjoying this — talking about her new friend at the library that he’ll probably have to run a background check on.

“Like he’s in his sixties or something. But he looks… actually, he looks your age! And he’s a student too. I told him all about you.”

Well, that doesn’t sound very reassuring coming from the mouth of a twelve-year-old. He’s not sure if that translates to his social security number, his current dilemma, or just that he’s her older brother.

“Like all of the stories you told me when I was a kid. And then when Lumine came to pick me up, she stayed to show him pictures of you too.”

“Of course she did,” he mumbles, ruffling her hair. One of these days he’s going to move without telling his classmates and the twins won’t enter his apartment unannounced. (But Tonia adores their company and the stories they tell her far too much for him to actually do it. But that doesn’t mean he’s above making threats when they tell his little sister about the bet he made about white-out and how it could dye hair. The jury is still out on this one.) “She’s just mad because I get away with it and she doesn’t. But don’t do it yourself. It’s a bad habit,” he adds, remembering that he should at least try to be a good influence on his younger sister when he can.

“Okaaay,” she says unconvincingly, before shaking her hair and running off to her room with lunch he prepared for her.

Watching her close the door and no doubt continue her binge of The Walking Dead, he takes out his phone and texts Lumine.

Childe