#mention of transphobia in -damn thing- | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

bunni-v1 · 7 months

Note

Heyyaaa

May I request dorm leaders finding out you’re a girl please? If it’s too much u can make a part 2

Dorm Leaders Find Out You're a Girl?!?!?! (NOT CLICKBAIT!!!)

TW: Mentions of transphobia (nothing awful, just literally dropping the word lol); Idia is creepy

Info: Riddle, Leona, Azul, Kalim, Vil, Idia, Malleus x Reader (Platonic or Romantic); Fluff, Comedy(?)

🍓This one is gonna be long, like 5.3k words long. I love writing the dorm leaders so damn much <3 Besides, there’s been a long wait for this one, so I hope I make it worth it! You might see some favoritism shine through, but I did my best to keep it even. Hope you all enjoy!

Tags: @kierancaz @danchann33 @arashrita @the-ace-reader @akiyamasmizuki @kitsun369 @bloomstruck (I think I got all of you)

First Years

Ortho Sebek

Second Years

Third Years

-Okay so, I know we’re all wondering, how the hell do you get away with hiding your gender for so damn long?

-Firstly, those ceremonial robes do great at hiding the figure. The only tell would maybe be your hair, but feminine men aren’t unwelcome at Nightraven College, so you mostly get a few questioning stares and that’s it.

-Secondly, Crowley wants to save his own fucking ass. He already has to hide from the press that he has a MAGICLESS student from ANOTHER DIMENSION here, he doesn’t need the fact that you are a woman ALSO on his plate. So, obviously, he helps you hide your gender from others.

-Grim knows, of course, and he keeps his mouth shut for a few yummy cans of tuna (and threats of being expelled from Crowley <3)

-Even when you were just a janitor, he couldn’t have the rumor that he put a “helpless” young woman to work. (Like it wouldn’t be expected.)

-So how do you two do it?

-Baggy ass uniform. Crowley gave you at least three sizes too big.

-Your figure is completely hidden. Sure, you look completely homeless, but at least you’re hidden.

-For your voice, you simply deepen it. After some point, you blackmail Crowley into giving you a potion to help with it, since it's so taxing on your voice. (Or maybe your voice is naturally deep!)

-Sam provides you (for an unfairly pretty penny (not too different from your original world…)) any feminine hygiene products you might need.

-Honestly, you’re set for being cared for, but it’s the adjustment period that’s the hardest part.

-Truly, it’s very jarring to suddenly be thrown into both a magical world and be isolated in a man's world with nowhere to hide.

-At least in your world you had other women who could understand your struggles. Here though? You’re completely alone.

-You notice how… messy some of these guys could be. How some of them smell… really rancid. -How rough they were with you and each other.

-Honestly, it’s kinda eye-opening. The way men show affection to each other is oddly refreshing to watch and experience!

-Ace and Deuce specifically are a good… trial run.

-That’s not what we’re here to talk about though…

-For the most part, it's incredibly easy to hide yourself for the first while on campus. Everyone on campus is so self-absorbed that they don’t bother questioning you.

-Your only real risk factor is Savannaclaw, but it's easy to avoid those guys (minus Jack, of course).

-However, you can only hide your gender for so long… It’s mentally draining to keep up this facade all the time around people you care about.

-So… how do they find out?

Riddle

-Riddle is the last student in Heartslabyul to find out.

-It’s not like he did anything to you for you to hold off on telling him (you know, other than the whole almost killing you that one time thing), it’s just that you don’t feel inclined to tell him.

-Simple as that.

-He also really has no reason to question your gender.

-Riddle didn’t have must interaction with people his own age until he came to night raven college, he doesn’t have the same social ideologies as other people do.

-Nightraven college is really his first touch with society outside of his mothers very watchful, conservative eye.

-So, excuse him for not picking up on stupid little gendered norms that the other students do.

-In his eyes, you dress like a man, you act (sort of) like the other male students, and you prefer he/him pronouns.

-There’s nothing more to it then, right? If you identify as a man, he has no reason not to treat you as such - nor should he suspect you would hide your gender like that.

-Besides, this is an all boys school! Crowley wouldn’t allow you to attend here unless you were also a boy… right?

-He is aware there are exceptions — and you are already QUITE the exception, but surely Crowley wouldn’t be so cruel as to force a young woman to attend an all boys academy.

-Ah, sweet Riddle, ever in denial.

-He isn’t STUPID though. He notices how brotherly Trey is to you. He knows (and has heard) your many “secret sleepovers” with Cater.

-He ignores these things and doesn’t comment on them simply because, well, he likes you!

-He helps to tutor you sometimes, and he’s gotten to know you through that, and he really does come around on enjoying your presence.

-So, he ignores Trey and Cater’s odd behaviors for your sake.

-You keep him and his dorm members in high spirits, why would he want to shoo something like that away?

-He doesn’t really questionthings until he… overhears a conversation between Deuce and Ace. (A rather loud one, for how supposedly secret this topic was meant to be).

-One of them had gotten in trouble with a professor, and he was going to give them a stern scolding when he overheard what they were talking about.

-“Deuce, dude, you’re gonna want to sit down for this one.”

“What is it, I’m busy trying to finish my potionology homework.”

“Seriously this one is crazy, you’re not ready for for it.”

“Ace, if you’re just messing with me I’m going to leave.”

“Dude, the prefect is a girl.”

“…What?”

-Riddle did not bother the two after that. In fact, he just walked back to his room to sit and think about what he just overheard.

-It DID make sense. You didn’t quite fit in with everyone else for reasons outside of your otherworldly origin.

-You acted differently than the typical guy here at NRC, and you seemed to get along with the peers that were more ‘traditionally feminine’ best.

-It would explain Trey’s coddling and Cater’s secretiveness.

-Still, he didn’t want to assume. This was Ace and Deuce, and Ace could just be messing around with Deuce.

-So, at your next tutoring session, he broaches the subject as politely as possible.

-“So, prefect, I have… overheard something that I wanted to ask you about.”

“Oh no, am I in trouble because of Ace and Deuce again.”

“Not… technically… I did, however, overhear them talking about… you being a woman.”

“…I’m gonna kill them.”

“I could collar them for you, if that would help.”

-The confirmation was reassuring for Riddle in multiple ways.

-1) Ace isn’t as terrible of a person as the thought he was.

-2) He wasn’t crazy in noticing the slight differences in you and your other peers.

-Now, you and Riddle aren’t exactly super close by any means, so your interactions with each other are limited to when you’re either being tutored or with friends in Heartslabyul.

-However, he is notably more nervous than he usually is.

-He doesn’t have some super secret crush on your all of the sudden, he just… never really had a chance to interact with women before.

-His mom kept him very sheltered from the opposite gender, so he has little to no experience with them.

-On top of that, because of his mother, he does have a slight fear of women. He’s afraid he’s going to upset you and you’ll blow a fuse on him or something.

-You have to assure him that you don’t bite and you won’t suddenly start screaming at him for no reason, and then he begins to relax a bit.

-Still, he’s very sweet and gentlemanly to you.

-If you need help with anyone around campus, you should come to him and he will have them dealt with accordingly.

Leona

-Leona “Respects Women” Kingscholar.

-Leona has SLIGHTLY worse smell than Ruggie, but he also knew immediately upon your arrival that you were a girl.

-In fact, he knew you weren’t a trans man, because they smell distinctly different from the typical woman.

-There aren’t many trans people in the Savannah though, so Ruggie not being able to pick up on that doesn’t really shock him.

-Leona, however, has smelled and seen plenty of trans people in his life time — you aren’t one of them.

-He won’t lie, he’s definitely interested in you. Women where he comes from are big and strong and proud, you’re just kind of plain.

-He keeps his ever curious eye on you though, because he’s interested in how you might navigate this whole thing.

-Now don’t get it twisted, he doesn’t care about you, he’s curious about you.

-If you were to ask him for help on something, he wouldn’t offer it. (Not that you would, you seem particularly averse to him).

-However, if he were to see some creep trying to… well… creep on you, he’d chase them away without ever having you know he did.

-He was your secret bodyguard who wouldn’t admit it even if you held a knife to his throat.

-Still, he stayed out of your way and you stayed out of his.

-A symbiotic relationship that you weren’t even aware existed… until you got in his way.

-Like Ruggie, when you start getting a little too involved in his ahem business, he gets pretty damn annoyed.

-You’re not exactly a threat to start, but you are a little trouble maker. If you find out what he’s up to, you’ll ruin his plans completely, and he can’t have that.

-However, he’s not exactly comfortable “taking care of you” like he is his male peers.

-He respects women, okay, you can’t blame him for not wanting to purposefully hurt you. (If his mom and brother found out, he’d never hear the damn end of it)

-He sends out Ruggie to scare you off, explicitly telling him he can’t hurt you on purpose.

-He knows Ruggie already has an idea of what’s going on, so he doesn’t have any qualms with telling him to be careful with you.

-Still, despite all this, he doesn’t really broach the topic until he’s forced to.

-He’s made it known to you, at this point, that he knows your secret.

-He hasn’t caused you any extra trouble since his overblot, and he keeps his dorm members off your back, so you have no reason to interact with him… until, again, you get yourself into trouble.

-This time it’s YOU dragging him into your mess, despite him wanting nothing to do with it.

-You are convincing, though, so he gives and allows you to stay in his dorm room — rent free! Isn’t he so nice.

-Jack offers himself for protection if you need it, but you can see that Ruggie is quite bemused with the whole situation, so you decide to turn him down.

-Leona hasn’t tried anything yet, and he really could if he wanted to.

-You decide you can trust him. (You have to trust him).

-Then presents the issue of sharing a bed.

-Leona isn’t a weird pervert, okay. He isn’t absolutely leaping at the idea to be in bed with you — he’s so sorry.

-Honestly, it makes him a bit… uncomfortable.

-Sharing a bed is something you do with family or someone you’re involved with, not the weird magic-less kid who’s at least three years too young for you.

-So, Leona, ever the women’s rights activist, approaches you with a proposition.

-“Listen, I know you’re a woman and I know you know that. We’re not sharing a bed, there ain’t no way that’s happening.”

“Oh, so would you like the poor helpless homeless woman to sleep on the floor? How cruel can you be Leona.”

“Shut up, I’m not gonna do that to you. Listen, you can have the bed all to yourself and I’ll sleep on the couch, so long as you promise not to tell a single soul about this.”

“I promise.”

-You immediately tell Ruggie the next morning, and he is sure to make sure Leona never forgets it.

-Living with Leona for the short period of time that you do is very insightful!

-He’s actually pretty funny, much smarter than he lets on, and almost brotherly to you. Which does not fit the M.O. you built of him in your head.

-He’s gruff and pushy, but he does it out of genuineness.

-You end up getting really close to him because of it.

-His quiet and laid-back demeanor are a break from the chaos of everyone else on campus, and he doesn’t make a big deal out of anything so you can just complain and he nods along unbothered.

-Only thing you notice that upsets him is when you bring up guys who bother you.

-Those guys tend to stop bothering you shortly after. How strange…

Azul

-Azul is hands down the last person on campus you want knowing about this.

-Riddle, Ruggie, Trey, Cater and pretty much everyone with half a brain tell you to stay as far away from him as possible.

-You see him in the halls sometimes, and he doesn’t look to bad. Unapproachable, sure, but he’s a rather pretty guy. Well put together and seemingly very smart from what you’ve been told.

-He helped to subdue Grim in the opening ceremony, so you know he’s magically capable. He’s also a house warden, so that goes unspoken, I suppose.

-He seems interested in you, from what you can tell. He always waves at you when he does see you in a sort of fake friendly kind of way.

-You’ve seen him and his little (large, very large) goonies admiring ramshackle before.

-You’ve also politely asked them to not do that when you moved in, because it freaks you out a lot. To which they all gave you very eerie smiles and walked away.

-They remind you of a very small mafia, and you decided to heed your friends warnings because of that.

-You do so successfully for a long time too. Other than the few previously stated interactions, Azul seems un-inclined to bother you, and you don’t want to catch his leering eyes.

-Little do you know, Azul has a much more watchful eye on you that you initially thought.

-Sure, you don’t have much to offer him magic wise, but you have ramshackle. Oh, how he wants ramshackle.

-You are key to obtaining it, he just… has to find something on you first.

-You’re so painfully average. Perhaps a little more pretty in the face than his other peers, but you sacrifice that with the atrociousness of your uniform.

-Truly, nothing about you is different.

-He almost gives up until Grim delivers him an opportunity in a pretty little bow.

-You agree to his contract out of the goodness of your heart, just like he knew you would. So sweet and kind are you, to practically hand him the deed to ramshackle on a silver platter.

-He notices, however, that Jade grows a very… sudden fascination with you.

-Sure, he told both Jade and Floyd to keep and eye on you and keep you in like, but for Jade to be so interested… very odd.

-Then, shortly after, Floyd’s own interest is piqued. Alright… less odd than Jade, but to have both of their eyes on you must mean he’s missing something. (I know I previously said that Floyd found out after Azul, but I was stupid and wrong and you should never listen to me when I’m talking about Floyd).

-He tries to get it out of them by any means, Asking, blackmailing, manipulation. He really does try, but their lips are sealed tight.

-It frustrates him to no end that they know something he doesn’t, and that he can’t figure out this very big secret.

-It stumps him for so long, because he’s looking in all the wrong places for the answer.

-Meanwhile, you know that Jade and Floyd know and you are TERRIFIED waiting for Azul to use this against you.

-The suspense starts killing you and making you anxious enough that its affecting sleep, so you decide to bite the bullet and arrange a meeting with him.

-Azul is honestly delighted, because he was just going to outright force the truth from you at this point.

-“I’m glad you set up this meeting, I’ve been meaning to talk to you.”

“I know… I’ve been pretty nervous about it since Jade and Floyd started pestering me.”

“Before I talk about what I want to, I’d like to hear what you have to say. I’m a good listener after all.”

“Too good, if you ask me. Uhm, anyway, so I know that Jade and Floyd to you that I’m a girl already, but I’m really hoping you would just leave me be. You owe me after all.”

“…You’re a girl?”

“Did they not tell you…?”

-what. What? WHAT?!?!?!

-How could he not tell, he feel so incredibly stupid. Its so obvious now that he thinks about it.

-No wonder Jade and Floyd wouldn’t stop teasing him about it.

-He agrees not to let the secret out — he DOES owe you his life, after all. This is a minor trade.

-However, he does not mentally recover from this revelation for a while.

-He doesn’t treat you very different, I suppose. He’s more gentlemanly with you, and is generally more friendly, but those things come from saving a persons life regardless.

-He is, surprisingly, willing to ensure your whole gender thing doesn’t get out so long as you work a few hours at the monster lounge.

-Probably the best at keeping it to himself and making sure it doesn’t get out. You wouldn’t expect any less with Azul, though.

Kalim

-You and Kalim don’t really have much of a chance to interact.

-He seems sweet enough, and you know he’s much kinder than the rest of the dorm leaders, but you don’t really have any reason to interact with him.

-Kalim also doesn’t think too much of you.

-You caused a ruckus at the entrance ceremony, that’s for sure, but you kinda blend into the background.

-Besides he’s a party animal — constantly hosting these huge parties at his dorm just because he can.

-As someone trying to keep out of trouble and hide such a huge secret… yeah, parties aren’t exactly your forte.

-So, when you get roped in to coming to Scarabia over winter break, Kalim is pleasantly surprised!

-He’s always excited to make a new friend, and you’re pretty infamous around school, so he’s extra excited to get to know you.

-Kalim has no reason to question anything about you, like most other people would.

-However, he isn’t stupid. He has plenty of younger sisters, and he picks up on social queues better than you’d expect.

-He definitely suspects something is off, but he figures you would tell him if something was up.

-You actually find him quite easy to be around. He’s someone who makes it easy to let your walls down and just relax with.

-Despite his sudden mood shifts, he always makes sure that you’re happy and healthy and doing the best you can be in your position.

-However, you run out of the magical potion that deepens your voice pretty quickly, and you have to go back to dramatically straining your voice.

-You sound sick, honestly, and it makes Kalim worry.

-He figures that you’re forcing yourself to deepen your voice so you’re still perceived as a man.

-Instead of asking you directly, as Kalim does, he goes to Jamil.

-“Jamil…”

“What do you need, Kalim?”

“Don’t you think somethings… off with the prefect?”

“Off? What are you talking about, nothings off with them.”

“No, I mean… do you think they might be… a girl?”

“…Kalim, that’s very rude to say. You need to be more respectful.”

“…You’re right, I’m sorry. Could we get him something to soothe his voice though, it sounds rough.”

-Kalim is a lot more watchful of you after that. He just… knows something is wrong, but he doesn’t want to be rude.

-It’s actually you who comes to him when no one is around for help.

-“Kalim, uhm, I need your help.”

“Sure, what’s up?”

“So, I’m pretty sure you know, but I’m not a guy… I’m a girl, and I really need help hiding it. The longer I’ve been here, the harder it’s been on me.”

-Sweetheart he is, he promises to both help you and keep your secret to himself — and he does both surprisingly well!

-He offers his private bathroom to you so you can shower in peace.

-It’s honestly the best bath you’ve ever had with all his sweet smelling oils. Your skin feels so smooth and renewed.

-Still, even with this, you still don’t feel safe with anyone else — plus the fact that Kalim has random and horrifying mood shifts. You have to flee.

-And yet you still get dragged into more trouble with the octatrio. You still get exposed to the whole dorm by a crazed Jamil, and now have to deal with the horror that they’ll tell everyone.

-Kalim feels awful, and thus shows his forgiveness in the best way he can: giving gifts.

-You get tons of apology gifts from him in the coming months. Baskets of the best shower stuff you’ve ever had; a new, better fitted but still innocuous uniform; enough tuna to keep grim satisfied for years (and sweets that you happily keep to yourself).

-It’s so nice, but you start to feel bad. It feels like you’re taking advantage of his guilt, when you’re not really upset at anyone involved anymore.

-You’re welcome at Scarabia any time. None of his dorm members will ever cause you any trouble, and you can dress and act and sound however you want within Scarabia’s walls.

Vil

-Miss beauty queen himself. We love Vil, we Stan Vil, we adore Vil…

-Oh my god he’s a pain in the ass though, especially for you.

-He sees through you in an instant.

-Truly, Vil finds you to be more of a little pest than anything.

-You are constantly in trouble, you are magic less, and you decided to needlessly hide your gender.

-The last one is the worst offense in his eyes.

-Vil is someone who does not value gender, but expression. Your gender does not matter as much as your expression, therefore you hiding your expression irks him.

-He’s understanding enough in the fact that he knows you might be doing this to protect yourself, but he finds it stupid and useless, because you’re easy to see through.

-He avoids you, and you avoid him. Simple as that.

-Unfortunately for Vil, you’ve caught Rook’s eye, which means he must sit through many hours of Rook rambling on about his “findings” about you.

-When you tried out for the VDC, he was simply going to turn you and Grim away, but Rook convinced him to give you a chance.

-Rook wanted him to help your reveal your “inner beauty”, though Vil wasn’t sure if you had any of that.

-You wore baggy, horrifically ugly clothing up until winter break. Your hair was constantly a mess. Your skin was poorly taken care of, and the bags under your eyes were as dark as night.

-It almost made him feel bad for you… so despite his better judgement, he decided to invest time in you.

-Vil makes it very clear that he knows what your whole secret is.

-“I am aware of the fact that you are a woman, however, I will continue to use your preferred pronouns since it seems to bring you comfort.”

-He’s very insistent that you allow him to do your skincare AND your makeup whenever you give him the chance.

-Especially when he moves into ramshackle temporarily, he’s very insistent on maintaining your skincare routine.

-He essentially makes your entire nightly routine himself, and is right there over your shoulder making sure you do it right.

-Despite how overbearing it is, you actually make good friends with him through this.

-Being stuck alone in a room with no one but him to talk to forces you two to talk.

-You get to learn why he cares so much about appearances, and he gets to know why you hide to protect yourself.

-“It’s just… easier to pretend, because guys will bother me less that way.”

“I can’t understand why they would bother you. You’ve done nothing to them, so why would they want to do anything to you.”

“That’s the thing, I don’t know either. I just know it’s scary, and I don’t want to deal with it.”

-You move him, honestly. You’re strong even though you’re scared, and that’s beautiful. Thats what true beauty is.

-He helps you embrace your inner self and express that, while still helping you to hide your gender in a way that feels safe.

-You are always welcome at Pomefiore, and you can come to either him or Rook if you have any issues at all.

-It’s like having a big sister, almost.

Idia

-Idia has eyes everywhere.

-Every inch of that campus is (illegally) being monitored by his watchful eyes.

-When he’s bored in class, he flicks through the cameras to amuse himself — maybe he’ll see someone slip and fall on their ass. That would be funny.

-He’s not really interested in you in particular.

-In fact, he’d like to keep a very far distance between the two of you.

-You’re… intimidating. You’ve fought some of the most powerful mages on campus and won.

-Total final boss energy, not something Idia is interested in being around.

-What he IS interested in is that wittle kitty you’ve got following you around.

-When he’s bored in class, he goes searching for Grim, and where Grim is you are sure to be.

-So, despite his aversion to you, he ends up spending a lot of time watching you.

-He starts to notice… things about you.

-He notices that you seem to put on a tough guy persona around… well… other guys in your class.

-When it’s just you and Grim though? You’re the softest softie he’s ever seen.

-It’s top tier cringe watching you try to being all macho, so he much prefers your more quiet and relaxed self you show in private.

-Seriously though, you’re a TOTALLY DIFFERENT PERSON when you’re alone with certain people.

-EVEN YOUR VOICE CHANGES!!!

-It’s so uber creepy, it’s like a jumpscare every time you drop that fake deep voice.

-If he’s being real, you’ve got a pretty voice. Honestly, you’re really pretty period. Too pretty to be a guy honestly.

-…

-….

-…..HOLY SHIT!!!

-He has to check your medical files to be sure — which he obviously has access to, thanks to having access to everything Ortho has access to.

-Blah blah blah allergies, blah blah blah horrific injuries from overblots, blah blah blah- AH HAH!

-Next to gender you are listed as… transgender man.

-He doesn’t wanna be that weird transphobic incel, but from what he’s seen? He highly doubts that.

-From what he’s seen in his (invasive) watching, you’re definitely doing the troupe of hiding your gender to better fit in.

-He feels like he’s in an anime or something.

-He doesn’t really want to bother you about it — but from watching you, you seem like someone he’d really enjoy being around.

-Ortho also insists that he’d get along with you very well!

-…It’s worth a shot right.

-He tries several times to “bump” into you, which always ends in him skittering away in fear.

-He psyches himself out every time. “They wouldn’t even wanna hang out with a loser like me.” “They’re way too cool for someone as lame as me.”

-It’s not until you invite yourself to one of tabletop club’s meetings that he’s forced to interact with you.

-He’s really banking on the fact that you’ll be too busy talking with Azul to notice him, but then Azul leaves and its just you and him.

-Him and you…

-Both of you… in total and complete silence.

-…yep…

-“Uhm, Idia…?”

“yES!?”

“I came here cause I wanted to talk to you, sorry for being so underhanded about it, I just couldn’t get you alone without you running off.”

“AH— I mean, ahem, okay. My bad.”

-You totally cornered him like an evil villain.

-All because you wanted to… be his friend?

-Is he dreaming, going insane perhaps, did HE get isekaied into an alternate universe where he was likable???

-Nope, Ortho just talks him up a lot, and you think his hair is cool. Huh. Kinda lame compared to what he was thinking.

-You guys talk a LOT after that. You exchange numbers and you text him about all sorts of stuff — and he’s actually interested in it!

-You learn that he’s been watching you and Grim for a long time, and while you scold him.

-You think it’s pretty funny that he’s embarrassed about his love for cute things.

-“If you’ve been keeping your eye on me for so long, you must’ve figured out that I’m a girl, right?”

“Yeah, you’re not great at hiding it. That macho guy act is suuuuper lame, you look like a noob lol.”

“Hey! I’m just copying what Deuce told me to do!”

-You guys don’t really see each other face to face very often, but like I said you text a lot.

-Sometimes he’ll text you shit like ‘I saw that, saved it for blackmail.’ After you biffed your shit on the pavement or something.

-When Idia gets more comfortable, you two spend hours on call whenever you get the chance.

-He lends you some of his precious manga, and even gives you an older TV he had laying around so you can watch stuff at ramshackle.

-Sometimes he invites you over to play video games with him and Ortho, and he gets all cocky and proud when you gush about how cool all his tech is.

-And, yeah, Idia definitely forms a little crush on you — but he would do that regardless of your gender.

-He just likes you a lot, and you can feel safe on campus knowing he’s watching over you when you need it. (Mostly watching Grim, tbh.)

Malleus

-We know that Malleus enjoys… creeping outside of Ramshackle.

-He spends quite a lot of time on your front lawn, therefore, he’s usually in proximity of you.

-However, he is very intimidating!

-As a young woman in a magical world that you are not from, a very tall man with horns is the exact opposite of what you want to be around.

-Besides, you’ve heard the rumors about him — how powerful he is, and how scary he is.

-Malleus, on the other hand, is admittedly curious about you.

-He finds humans in their own right incredibly interesting, but you are not just a regular human.

-You are a human who has no magic and is from another world entirely.

-You are something he has never once seen in his whole life, so excuse his childish curiosity.

-Still, you’re sort of cleverly avoiding him at every chance you get, and he just can’t quite find the time to talk to you.

-Until one night, you come back rather late and you find him in your yard… again.

-You send Grim in by himself and decide to confront him by yourself, because you are tired of being afraid to fall asleep at night.

-“Hey, you, could you maybe not stare at my house in the middle of the night!”

-Oh. You are quite feisty, and very bold to approach Malleus Draconia with such an aggressive tone.

-“I’m unsure what you mean, I’m simply admiring the architecture.”

“I don’t care WHAT you’re doing, you’re freaking me out! I know you’re supposedly some big scary monster guy, but I need you to STOP being weird outside my house.”

“…My apologies…”

-Malleus is pleasantly surprised at your spunk — he’s never been spoken to like that, he’s excited by it.

-After you yell at him, you let him explain himself, and you realize he is just… really, really bad at socializing.

-He wasn’t watching you, he just really enjoys silence and ramshackle is the quietest place on campus — even with you living in it.

-So, you give him the benefit of the doubt, because he really does just seem like he’s lost on everything around him 90% of the time.

-You don’t hang out with him during the day, but if you happen to see him on your lawn (as he usually is), you go out and hang out with him for a while.

-It makes Malleus happy, because you treat him like a friend. You give him cute nicknames, and you invite him inside for snacks, and you go out of your way to say hello to him when you pass him in the halls.

-He also gets to know more about you, and his curiosities about you and your world get quelled.

-He doesn’t really question anything about you, especially not your gender.

-Gender is hardly important for fae, and you seem confident in your expression, so he has no reason to wonder. Besides, there are far more thrilling things about you than your sex.

-So, you and Malleus start to grow close. So close, in fact, that you can confidently say that he’s one of your closest friends.

-At this point, almost everyone who you want to know about your gender knows. Everyone but Malleus.

-Initially you kept it a secret because you didn’t know how good he was at not talking, but now…

-Now, well, you don’t really have a reason.

-People usually question you at this point, or at least seem suspicious, but Malleus?

-Malleus shows not a hint that he thinks something is up. It’s odd to you, isn’t he supposed to be super smart or something. Maybe he’s just too respectful.

-Regardless, you decided to talk to him about it the next time you see him staring at the gargoyles around campus.

-“Hey Tsunotaro, what’re you up to?”

“Just admiring these gargoyles here, aren’t they fascinating? They were the first few installed in the school, if my memory serves me correctly.”

“They are very cool, but could I ask you something not gargoyle related?”

“What is it, child of man?”

“You know that I’m, uhm, a girl right?”

“Oh. I did not know that, how interesting.”

-He doesn’t understand why you would hide that, but it doesn’t really perturb him that much.

-The most you got was an eyebrow raise, and then he was back to his gargoyles.

-You were pretty satisfied with that, so you figured he wouldn’t tell anyone… and then you hear him loudly talking about it with his friends in Diasomania.

-Sigh… he means well, but he just doesn’t get the social stuff.

-You’re not mad, because pretty much everyone knows at this point, but it still sucks that he’s such a loudmouth.

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spacelazarwolf · 1 year

Text

i think posts like this show just how utterly disconnected other trans people are from the actual experiences of trans men, and just from trans men in general. bc a lot of y’all literally cannot comprehend that trans men experience anything besides getting misgendered occasionally and having to wear a binder. y’all think that’s the extend of trans masculine existence. because most of y’all do not fucking care to learn a damn thing about us.

we are literally talking about all of the things the second poster mentioned. we are talking about our rates of sexual assault and murder, we’re talking about medical transphobia, we’re talking about employment discrimination, public harassment, how the repeal of roe v wade affects american trans men, etc.

but you know what happens when we do that?

we get told to shut the fuck up.

so like. you gotta pick one. you can’t claim trans men aren’t talking about Serious Stuff that affects us and then actively silence us when we are literally talking about Serious Stuff that affects us.

#atm

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1spooky-dad · 2 years

Text

People keep asking if I've watched stranger things and i just sigh cause on one hand, the more people demand i watch something, the less i want to watch it, on the other, i want to watch it even less bc a transphobe i met in college ruined it for me during one of our sign language practices (it was around this time i discovered she was a transphobe)

Its not stranger things fault, but we were talking about it, all of us were about 20/21, at the time the kid actors were still very young, about 13/14, and this girl is like "finn wolfhard is so cute! I'd totally fuck him <3" and i and the other girl we're with look at her in shock and im like "dude, he's not an adult you can't say that" she got mad at me for that, and said he was fair game cause he's an actor??? And that of course she was gonna wait for him before she went after him for real. Like. There is so much about this girl that was fucked, she said she'd rather date and "try to fix" a Nazi than date a black guy. She told me i "was still a woman, just don't like what society says a woman must do" she said Black Panther (which had come out recently) was misogynistic cause the women added nothing to the plot (what movie did she watch???)

But like. The Finn thing will always stand out to me, out of everything she did before i told her to Fuck off and never speak to me again. I haven't been able to so much as look at the stranger things title card without feeling sick because of her. This girl's 24 now. She's got a job somewhere, she pays taxes, and dear God, i hope she's not still "waiting" I've never met such a creep before or since, and i fear what else will be ruined for me if i ever do

#stranger things #transphobia #racism #misandry #oh yeah she proudly called herself a misandrist #nazi mention #strangers stop asking me if ive seen stranger things challenge #im just doung my job let me get you some fish dont talk to me about this damn show #i kniw its not the shows fault but i havent been able to enjoy it ever since #rant

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bxyp · 4 months

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Could you maybe do something with a ftm reader who has a lot of scars and tattoos especially on his back and like Ghost sees him shirtless for the first time? Without Ghost knowing your trans? And it just being fluff and a little bit of angst?

If you don't feel comfortable doing this its okay!!

Sincerely: a very cool person

His priority is your well-being, not some scars you have.

Summary: You have been shot, and Ghost, as your comrade, helps you treat the wound. What could go wrong?

Pairing: Simon "Ghost" Riley x FTM Reader

warnings: SWF content, "Ghost" '22, transphobia is mentioned, post-surgery scars are described, military, soldier! reader, blood, wounds were mentioned, reader gets shot.

word count: 592

Being transgender in the military wasn't easy. Sneaking into the shower right after everyone had left to just take a shower, just without anyone knowing. Just to make sure no one judges or looks weird. It wasn't easy in the army. The service here was even harder…

Being wounded in the line of duty was not unusual, even the best soldier could receive a scratch. And even now you are leaning against some old tree in East Asia. Things never go according to plan, that's part of the job.

Eyes barely open, this job is not for the weak. That's why you clench your teeth while Ghost starts pulling you out of your gear to put bandages on your gunshot wound on shoulder. Of course you wish you could do it by yourself but right now you priority was to not get infection.

"Keep your eyes open, soldier." Ghost’s harsh tone didn’t let you relax even for a second, which was probably for the best. He didn't pay much attention to your tattoos or scars, figuring he could take a closer look at them once he stitched you up.

You feel his gloved hands slowly pour the alcohol onto your shoulder. Sharp pain simply drowned out all your thoughts. Every cell of your body felt like it was on fire. "Fuck! Be gentle, I’m bleeding.” You spat as soon as you unclenched your teeth. Everything hurt so much, your mind could barely focus on one thought.

"I'm well aware of that." He said that once he found the nearest piece of cloth to cover the bleeding, he would help you get to your feet and get to the nearest evacuation site.

He picked up the radio and said something, but you could barely hear what. Only thing you got was that he said that you had been shot and you both needed to evacuate as soon as possible. He probably said something else, but your head hurt, along with that damn shoulder that felt like it was being cut off, slowly, piece by piece. His skillful hands quickly tightened some fabric on your shoulder. And without giving you time to come to your senses, he picked you up, throwing your good arm over his shoulder. “The evacuation helicopter will be there in a few minutes. Get back on your feet."

You both slowly walked towards the place Ghost lead you to. Only now did you remember that he probably saw your scars… Those top surgery scars that you covered with everything you could. Those scars that you hid. These white lines are right under your pecs. You worked hard to make them hard to see. But neither cream nor some beaty products could remove them. A constant reminder of who you were born…

Anxiety rise in you, your stomach became a tight knot. You're afraid that he saw the scars that you tried to hide. “So, about what you saw…” You were afraid he might tell someone. The military was not the most acceptable place. Here you will have to fight not only on the battlefield, but also earn your place among others.

“I don’t care who you are, lad. My job is to keep you alive, not to pry into your personal life.” His words can be harsh and cold. But you don't see any condemnation here. He considers you his equal. Ghost wasn't the nicest person, but he wasn't an asshole who treated you differently just because you weren't like him.

The rescue helicopter was visible in the distance…

MAIN MASTERLIST | AO3 | TWITTER

𝔑𝔬𝔱 𝔪𝔲𝔠𝔥. ℑ'𝔪 𝔰𝔱𝔦𝔩𝔩 𝔤𝔢𝔱𝔱𝔦𝔫𝔤 𝔲𝔰𝔢𝔡 𝔱𝔬 𝔴𝔯𝔦𝔱𝔦𝔫𝔤 𝔰𝔦𝔫𝔠𝔢 ℑ'𝔳𝔢 𝔟𝔢𝔢𝔫 𝔞𝔴𝔞𝔶 𝔣𝔬𝔯 𝔞 𝔴𝔥𝔦𝔩𝔢. ℑ 𝔨𝔫𝔬𝔴 𝔦𝔱 𝔴𝔞𝔰 𝔰𝔲𝔭𝔭𝔬𝔰𝔢𝔡 𝔱𝔬 𝔟𝔢 𝔞 𝔣𝔩𝔲𝔣𝔣 𝔰𝔱𝔬𝔯𝔶, 𝔟𝔲𝔱 ℑ 𝔱𝔥𝔦𝔫𝔨 𝔦𝔱 𝔴𝔬𝔲𝔩𝔡 𝔣𝔦𝔱 𝔪𝔬𝔯𝔢 𝔱𝔬 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔊𝔥𝔬𝔰𝔱'𝔰 𝔠𝔥𝔞𝔯𝔞𝔠𝔱𝔢𝔯.

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freevoidman · 2 months

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Well, I think the writing's been on the wall for a while, but it's a very odd, bittersweet feeling seeing RT getting shuttered. I've grown to hate the company due to the YEARS of exploitative actions towards employees and their racist + sexist behavior, not to mention their transphobia and other bigotry that I am bound to be forgetting. I'm glad that the corporate level of this is being most likely closed.

However, a sudden closing like this means a lot of people's lives and homes are now in jeopardy, and my heart goes out to the employees. I hope that they're able to find jobs quickly, and that their new positions will treat them better than RT ever has. RT has taken many great talents and chewed them out, but that doesn't mean their talents and skills can't be appreciated in new environments, and that doesn't mean that this is fair to anyone who was working under them. I hope the best for them going forward.

As for RWBY... well, I've had mixed feelings about the show for a long damn time. I saw immense potential in the show, otherwise I would've never watched it, which I personally have felt has been squandered with poor writing over the years. I feel like that can absolutely be linked to the general treatment of employees--writers and animators alike--and though the future of RT's IPs and continuing shows is currently murky, I do hope that, if the shows return, they come back better and brighter despite years of fumbling.

When #GreenlightVolume10 started trending, I made the general statement that this would be ineffective. While fan presence can certainly be a factor in renewing a show, the guarantee of an audience is not often not enough to get a show budgeted. I doubt this post will reach many people but, if it does, I would implore people to take the time to look up who worked on which of your favorite episodes from RWBY and see if they're looking for work. Try to support them in this time, either by RT-ing resumes or through other means. RWBY would not exist without its animators, its story boarders, its technical lighting crew, literally any part of the actual crew. Use that same energy you did tweeting that hashtag and put it into supporting employees who learned today, just like the rest of us, that they're out of a job.

This is a sad thing, but RT had a hell of a run. I can only hope things get better moving forward for everyone impacted.

#rwde #rwby #rt #rooster teeth

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a-not-so-clean-blog · 2 months

Text

Nu carnival dealing with a transphobic family friend/ customer (ftm reader)

Warnings: transphobia. Spicy♦️ for Morvay.

Scene:

Your boyfriend decides to visit you at your job because he misses you and doesn't get to see you enough. Just a little visit to see how you're doing. He comes in and takes a seat in the corner of the cafe to wait for you to come over when you get a free minute. What he didn't expect to see was what looked like a family friend to be harassing you and actively misgendering you. Not to mention the invasive questions she has the gall to ask you…

Yakumo

Do you not hear the awful things this person is calling you? Girl? She? WIFE!? No no no, why aren't you correcting her? No sooner does the question run through his mind does he notice the tired and worn down look on your face. Like you've been through this a thousand times before and you're just waiting for it to be over again.

Anxiety be damned, he approaches the table as confidently as he could. Back straight but his fingers were laced together.

“Excuse me, you're making him uncomfortable.” His voice was quiet yet firm.

“Oh sweetie, no it's fine I know her mother.” She tried to wave him off, totally dismissing his presence.

“You're being rude. You should apologize to him.” They go back and forth like this for a minute before he gets really upset. So he turns his back to her and faces you directly. “I love you so much and you deserve so much better. When you're done working I'm going to make your favorite meal and we will cuddle until you feel better, okay?” His words are soft and caring. You know he wants nothing more than to take you out of this situation but knows he can't make a scene at your job.

When you get home he will do everything he can to remind you how masculine and perfect you are to him. He feels regret and wishes he could have done more in the moment, but also didn't want to get you in trouble at work or with your family.

Edmond

It takes him a moment to figure out what he's going to say. He is still cautious about having people know he is in a relationship with you, just for security reasons. So he can't just say “stop calling my boyfriend a girl.”. Ultimately he marches up to the table, stares the woman down, and in no uncertain terms tells her that her behavior is unacceptable.

“He has corrected you twice and you are actively disrespecting him by ignoring his claims.”

“If someone as bigoted as you frequents this establishment I can't imagine how much longer this shop will last.” As if on cue your manager rushes out to see what the fuss is about. Having an incident with the leader of the guards would be terrible for the cafe's reputation. After Edmond explained what happened your manager sided with him and basically gave her an ultimatum.

“Respect my employees or get out.”

She tried for a minute to get other patrons of the store to side with her but anybody who looked at the situation and saw Edmund standing there with his arms crossed knew better than to get involved. Unfortunately, instead of apologizing she simply left the store muttering curse words under her breath.

Olivine

He is probably the most polite of everyone here. He will ask the table if he can sit with them (of course they say yes because who's going to say no to Father Olivine). His heart breaks when he hears her nonsense tangent about “The great God of Klein made such a beautiful girl but she's wasting it by dressing like a man.”

It's so satisfying watching Olivine preach about how the God of Klein values individuals and makes their hearts perfect. “If his heart is a man's, then who are we to deny the great God of Klein’s judgment?” Everything she says to justify her transphobia he politely and lovingly shuts her down. “Those kinds of ideas are corrupting. Please, I think you should visit the temple and reflect on your own judgments.”

It's amazing watching her excuses be chipped away by someone who genuinely wants the best for people.

Quincy

He probably won't be quick to swoop in and “save you”. Honestly, he just wanted to hang out in your cafe while you worked. But now his day is ruined because somebody is upsetting his boyfriend, and clearly not respecting you no matter how many times you tried correcting them.

He quietly walks up behind you, his large frame casting a shadow over both you and the woman.

“See. That's what a real man looks like. Sweetie you could never compare so stop pretending.” The sickly sweet tone in her voice, the false compassion and pity left a bitter taste in his mouth.

He puts his hand on your shoulder and squeezes harder than intended. “This is what a real man looks like.” His voice was colder than any tone he's ever used around you before. You could feel the chill in your veins despite not being on the receiving end. You could see she was feeling the same effect you were, but much worse.

She stuttered as she tried to defend her transphobic views. Quincy stayed eerily silent until she was done spewing her bull shit. She took his silence as acceptance and by the end of her justification she gained a shit eating grin.

“If I ever hear you say that nonsense again I'm going to feed you to the bears in the wood territory.” Her face went pale as she realized he was not joking. Slowly she nodded her head, not wanting to make any sudden movements. Topper squeaked angrily at her and without another word Quincy returned to his seat. You could feel the warmth of his hand lingering on your shoulder even after he walked away, and the woman kept sneaking glances at him throughout her visit just to make sure he hadn't gotten up to do anything.

You know he didn't mean that threat seriously…right?

Kuya

He spent the better part of an hour watching you work before this family friend came in, just enjoying people watching and keeping an eye on you. That was until this family ‘friend’ came and started talking to you. Sitting just far enough away to make it difficult to hear what she was saying. Difficult, but he could still hear the pointed ‘she’s and ’her’s she spat. He didn't really care at first, not until he noticed you getting visibly uncomfortable. Normally he takes great pleasure in watching you squirm but this was different. This made him fume in a way he didn't know he could feel. Now isn't the time to think of his own feelings though, now was the time to make them stop.

He called you away from her table and asked you to make him something really quick. Probably something simple like a sandwich, but something that'll take you just enough time to get back so he can work. The moment you are out of the main dining area and in the kitchen he gets up and gingerly sits across the table from the surprised woman.

“I have something I think you should know~” He said in his normal sing-songy voice, curling his finger so she'll lean over the table for him. Slowly and clearly he whispers something in her ear, making sure she understood every word before leaning back in his seat to marvel at the appalled and horrified look on her face.

By the time you came back only a minute later she was gone and Kuya was back lazing in his seat, a sly smile on his face.

Blade

Sweet boy doesn't understand what the person is saying is malicious. It just turns into a back and forth of “darling is a boy” and “no she's a girl.” with both sides escalating until your manager skurries over to make them stop. When she stands up aggressively Blade almost goes into full protection mode.

You and your manager shift your focus from her to him. Blade doesn't stand down until you are holding him back and your manager kicking her out of the store.

When he comes back to his senses all he sees is you hugging him and he is happy as a clam. He doesn't even realize he almost went on a murder spree. Your manager is very tired and lets you go home early with Blade, just so he doesn't have to worry about Blade making another scene.

Garu

He hears everything that she's saying to you. Every nasty use of the wrong pronouns just made his fur prickle. His first instinct is to approach and get between you two but you've scolded him before about getting in the way of your job. His ears are pinned back against his head as he stares at the two of you.

He was patient enough to wait for you to be done taking her order. As soon as you leave her table he calls you over. “Are you okay? Why didn't you say anything? Do you need help?” His bombardment of questions hit you like a flood. His eyes were wide as he stared at you, practically staring into your soul. As you two were standing so close he could clearly smell the anxiety wafting off of you. He wanted to get rid of that smell, wanted the woman who caused it to go away, he just wanted to see you smile.

“It's okay Garu. She'll leave soon and I'll be fine.” You gave him a soft smile. His kindness always tugged at your heart.

“But she's upsetting my boyfriend!” He raised his voice a little as he was getting upset again. Not to the point of yelling but definitely to the point where she could hear you. It wasn't intentional but her face went red anyway. You gave him a quick kiss before thanking him and returning to your work.

She didn't bother you the rest of the time.

Karu

If you don't try to correct her misgendering you he will be confused but can wait to ask you about it later. However when you correct her and she blatantly starts calling you a girl more. He's on his feet ready to bite at a moment's notice.

“Shut up you hag. He told you he's a boy so now you're just being dumb!”

“Who are you calling dumb you little freak!?”

It does not take long for a full fledged brawl to break out between the two of them. You grab Karu by the arms and try your best to pull them off while other onlookers jump in and try to pull the woman away. Once the two are separated profanities are the only thing you can hear being screamed across the room. Both of them are kicked out of the cafe but she needs stitches and Karu successfully “defended your honor” so at least he's satisfied. You are put on clean up duty for the mess your boyfriend made, but secretly it did make you happy knowing just how far he'll go to make you feel seen.

Dante

Her face lit up when she saw Dante staring at you. Dante, the perfect specimen of a man. Smart, strong, handsome, and most importantly powerful. “Oh! Sun lord, don't you think she would make such a good wife!” She points at you, you are clearly upset and uncomfortable and it makes his blood boil.

“Absolutely not.” Her expression immediately fell at his words but she gained a wicked smile when she thought of a response.

“Oh dear, it's because she's so masculine. I keep telling her it's really unattractive and she won't ever find a good-” Dante's hot glare was enough to shut her up for a moment. The way he straightened his back and lifted his chin just to further look down on her gave you goosebumps.

“Let me be clear on one thing. He would make an awful wife, but is an exceptional boyfriend.” The woman was immediately shot down and put in her place. You're relatives that were sitting at the table awkwardly look away like they don't know anyone in this building. It's hard to tell what felt better, the butterflies in your stomach or the sweet taste of justice.

Rei

It's very simple actually. The solution to this problem is to buy a cup of coffee, go over to the table, and dump the hot coffee on the a-hole who insisted on misgendering you.

“Oops I didn't see you there. I must be as blind as you are.” And the entire time he maintained eye contact with her just daring her to say something. She, of course, starts screaming and throwing a tantrum. A string of “how dare you!” and “don't you know who I am!” came out with her shrill screeching.

He just shrugged and replied “I don't care who you are but anyone who disrespects my boyfriend like that means nothing to me. Frankly you're worse than scum and should be disgusted with yourself, but I know your type has no self awareness anyway.”

Eiden

He knows her type, he's dealt with them plenty of times in his world. He hates how she is talking about you, misgendering you and acting like you aren't even there. He's getting mad but he knows better than to make a scene in front of your family. So the next best thing to do is correct her.

He walks up beside you and puts an arm over your shoulder casually. “Oh? There's a pretty girl around here, where?”

She rolls her eyes when she looks at him. “You're leaning on her.”

Eiden looks to you then back to her, his eyes wide in fake bewilderment. “Ma'am are you feeling well? This is my boyfriend. He's very handsome, but pretty is not a word I would use to describe him.”

“Well she was born a girl so she's a girl.”

“Ah, so that explains why you're such a big baby!”

It's hard to hold back your laughter as her face turned bright red. For every other stupid transphobic comment she tried to make Eiden had a witty comment ready to shut her up.

“Well, gender is what's in her pants.”

“I was in his pants last night, so I guess I'm his gender.” Now your face went bright red as you lightly punched him in the arm which only made him laugh. His laugh was contagious, and the look on her face was satisfying.

Even the red hot glare she shot at you after a bit of your laugh slipped out didn't bother you anymore because Eiden was waiting to make her look a fool if she even tried to say something else about you.

Aster

He's not normally one to make a big scene so he doesn't move to confront her until after you've gone back to the kitchen to place her tables order.

“Hi, I couldn't help but notice your super cute top! That’s a Devilicious brand shirt right?”

Her face brightened when someone recognized her expensive brand of clothes. “Yes it is! I shop there all the time.” She bragged.

“What shop do you go to?”

“The one in water territory is my favorite, it has the best shirts but not as many shoes.”

“Hmmm good to know. I'm their supplier so I'm going to have them ban you from the store. I don't need bigots tarnishing my brand's name.” The way her face fell from pompous to petrified made Asters chest fill with pride. She scrambled to try and defend herself.

“What do you mean bigot?! I'm a good person.”

“Weren't you just calling that man a girl? He even corrected you.”

“No, no, you don't understand. I know her family and she is a girl.” When you came out you could see the sweat on her brow.

“Well he's my boyfriend and I don't care what his family lets you get away with calling him. Enjoy getting your Devilicious second hand.” He laughed as he walked past you and gave you a quick kiss on the cheek. “See you at home treasure.” And he was gone, leaving her in her booth on the verge of a crisis.

“What did I miss?”

Morvay

Oh he can feel his blood boiling every time she insults you like that. Not to mention nobody else at the table is even trying to defend you! Unacceptable.

He comes up behind you and wraps his arms around your waist, and buries his face into your neck. He's practically spooning you while standing up. “Mmmm when is my husband going to give me the attention I need?” he whines into your ear.

“Babe I'm done in an hour, please be patient.” Embarrassed, you try to wiggle out of his grasp but he doesn't budge. Instead he nudges his head deeper into your neck. You almost squeak when his lips brush against your soft spot.

“But I don't want to wait that long to suck your dick!” He loudly whines so the whole restaurant can hear. The sound that followed was defining. You firmly ushered him back to his table, begging him to behave until you aren't in public. He sighs wistfully but agrees.

His plan worked though. Anytime the jerk tried to misgender you the entire store of eavesdroppers gave her a collective confused look and she was socially forced to correct herself. No matter what she would try to say people are going to believe Morvays very personal claim over hers.

#Nu carnival Yakumo #nu carnival Edmond #nu carnival olivine #nu carnival Quincy #nu carnival Kuya #nu carnival Garu #nu carnival Dante #nu carnival Rei #nu carnival Aster #nu carnival Morvay #nu carnival Eiden #nu carnival x reader #nu carnival #tw transphobia #a degenerate writes #this is almost 3k words! im am proud but my brain hurts #♦️#x ftm reader #x ftm

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redcoralpot · 9 months

Note

Can you do Daryl finding out reader is trans? Early season 4, perhaps? :3

Attentu - Daryl Dixon x FTM Reader

Your wish is my command!!

Warnings: Gore, murder, violence, blood, cussing, mentions of transphobia and death, and addictions.

Word Count: 2.6K

You eagerly join in on the medical supply run, despite the group's awful luck. A confession from Bob has you feeling quite guilty about a personal matter...

It was dead.

You threw the car battery to the side, sick of the luck your supply group had. Daryl was on the other side of the room, shuffling through drawers in an attempt to obtain the right part. For an auto repair shop, it was horribly disorganized.

“Got anything?” you called over, impatient.

A grin took over your face as he tossed the find at you, catching it in a firm grip, “Nah.”

The car was not in terrible shape, not really. Some rust here and there, with paint scratched off from long road adventures before the outbreak. Your father had a similar car when you were just a child, and he was insistent that he passed on his knowledge, despite your mother’s constant objections. It was not fit for someone like you; that your hands should never be calloused from the tough ground nor covered in grease, she said. He always ended up laughing in her face.

So as he would have it, the two of you got in all sorts of trouble. Hijacking cars, picking locks, prying cabinets open with a pocket knife; all things he said would come in handy one day. Daryl seemed like he had the same type of upbringing, all rough and tumble, and perhaps that’s what drew you to him. That, or he was just really damn good with surviving.

Daryl’s footsteps creaked as he led the way out of the building, shining his flashlight on any possible threats around. Someone had to, as you weren’t keen to look after Bob found an old walker stuck under a desk, ending that misery. It was the only one left. One by one, you circled out of the building, with Bob’s silent trepidation behind you as you arrived back at the car. Daryl opened its hood again, and you both set to work.

His voice was muffled around his cigarette, “You never told us about the group you were with, before.”

You glanced up as Bob replied, “Which one?”

“You know,” he continued, when Daryl gave him a look, “when you found me out on that road, I almost kept walking.”

“Why’s that?’

“I was done being a witness. It happened two times, two different groups.”

…

“I was the last one standing, like God intended for me to see it over and over; a curse,” he shook his head, pursing his lips, “but, when it’s just you out there with the quiet, I used to drink a bottle of just 'bout anything just so I could sleep at night.”

“The run to the big spot, I only did it for me.”

You froze, a jug of clear liquid still in your hands. Daryl took it from you, completely unfazed, and managed to get a swig out of it.

He licked his lips, “You gotta keep busy somehow.”

“No, I did it so I could get me a bottle, a bottle of anything. That’s what got Zack killed.”

“That’s bullshit,” Daryl peered at him, “why don’t you get in there and try the engine? Should be the red and green wires, it ain’t rocket science.”

Even as Bob walked away, you stayed silent. Your fingers burned as you rigged the working car battery back in, but never as much as your thoughts. The other man nudged you, urging you to take your hands off as the engine roared in front of you. He clapped his hands and brought them up to his mouth; a sharp whistle rang through the air. Bob’s alcohol troubles seemed to be forgotten by Daryl, since he gave you a rusty smile while you slammed down the hood.

“Nobody coulda’ known, and you ain’t gonna be standing alone. Not anymore,” he reassured Bob.

You huffed, swinging a few plastic bags of gas in the back seats, ducking to join them. Tyreese and Michonne got the rest and the three of you squeezed together with the luggage, closing the door. With that, you left the burdensome place behind.

The ride to the college was short, but Bob still parked a little ways out, and the group set off to walk the rest of the distance. You passed most of the buildings on campus; dull brick that plants jumped at the opportunity to outgrow after a year of inactivity.

“Looks like the building we want is up ahead,” Tyreese stated.

For the first time since Bob’s confession, you spoke, “Are we splitting up? We’ll cover more ground that way.”

“Is that safe?” Michonne questioned, and Daryl eyed you.

“I know I can cover myself, if I end up alone.”

The brunette scoffed, and you shifted a glare at him, “You know I can, too. You’ve seen me.”

“I think,” Bob uttered, “it’s a good idea.”

“We don’t have a lot of time, I’ll shoot if I run into any trouble. Meet me back at the car.”

Outside of the Learning Resource Center, you split from the group, sneaking close to the ground. You heard the rest shuffle in the opposite direction with a soft “C’mon, c’mon.”, and let out a shaky breath. Two pairs, then three pairs of footsteps faded away.

The lights of the wing flickered and let out fading sparks as you padded along, dust pillowing up from wherever you stepped. God, the outbreak sure did a number on this place. Shadows grew as abundantly as the plants, but never dulled the smears of blood along the walls, floor, and shattered glass. It cracked and snapped under you, somewhere behind you, and you hissed as you looked at the walls alongside you. There were several doorways leading to different rooms, most likely supply closets or classrooms. Carefully, you dipped yourself into the nearest doorway, a heavy feeling on your back. Your heart pumped wildly in your chest and your stomach had a sick pit of anxiety as you thumbed through the biggest drawers. There were plenty of jars, containers, and vials, but none of them had what you needed. You read all the labels once, twice, the text in messy handwriting or tiny fonts.

Testosterone, in its liquid form made for injections, should be a clear liquid. You knew that much from what your provider told you, and from your own studies. Any colored liquids, or any with particles floating inside, you discarded from your search immediately. You were taking too long, you started to think, or were you? You didn’t know if you were gone for ten or if you have been here for thirty.

Once again, you slid back into the trashed hallway, trying to make your way towards the next doorway. The only things you could hear were your quick breaths and a creak, most likely from the forgotten building. A set pattern was in your mind as you dove into the room, and the haze of adrenaline made it hard to think. Walkers, as the prison liked to call them, were not your biggest concern. Even before the outbreak, it was dangerous for you to step outside; to live your life. If you passed by the wrong person, your face would be on the hot topic of the community for the week after. Getting caught was not an option.

You blinked, trying to clear the thumping in your ears. The vial’s label looked like a foreign language, though you knew it wasn’t, so you peered closer at it. A gust of hot air hit your neck, and again. Hot air. This place was cold.

Your fingers scrambled for the knife at your side, it was there, wasn’t it? You slashed before you could think. Hair scratched your fingers; your knife dug into a warm crevice. The hot air turned into a raw, groaning noise. The hot air stopped.

You pushed the body to the ground and your blade was released. The blood trickled hot down your wrist. Instead of the red you expected, it was a sludgy, filthy brown. It dripped in slow droplets on the floor beside your shoes. This was the first opportunity to look at the thing, and what a sight it was.

The knife had caved in a part of its skull, which itself was like a rotten, stomped on pumpkin. It oozed and dripped the same muck over the tile, muddying the disfigured face underneath. It made Osbourne’s stage trick look like simple child’s play to anyone who witnessed the act. Its eyes were still open; bulging out in that manic, hungry way only a madman got before the outbreak. You looked away from the mess, your breakfast seizing in your throat, and you busied yourself with getting more testosterone vials in your bag. The most important thing was that it was not human, not anymore.

Stuffing your full hand in your bag, you made a beeline for the doorway.

You should have learned your lesson.

A weight tumbled over you and knocked you to the floor, breathless. It screeched, rabid, like some sort of fucked up dog. If a dog hadn’t eaten for a month, that is. It stunk, too. It stunk so bad that you thought you might die from suffocation first.

It clawed at you, gnashing its yellow teeth. Your hands were pinned underneath the mass and you heard your knife land across the floor with a clang. This was going to be it. The end. It’s funny, isn’t it? Dying searching for your lifeline. You almost giggled at the irony.

The teeth were close to your neck, aiming to kill. To eat until you were nothing but an unrecognizable pile of flesh and bones. You had to do something, and soon. The only part of your body you could move were your legs, and you tensed them up. You were going to survive this, you were going to get back to that car.

Three.

You struggled to prop your shoulder up, knocking the danger away from your neck. Its eyes were bloodshot and cloudy. As empty as a corpse.

Two.

The walker got more desperate to bite you, wiggling around harshly on top of you. You tried your best to keep your face far away from its own, but it successfully nipped the edge of your nose. This was going to hurt.

One.

Its final noise was a gurgling one, close to your ear. The weight flopped to your right side, stilling its frugal attempt to destroy you.

“You got yourself covered, huh,” a voice remarked.

You wheezed, “Christ.”

“What were you doin’?”

“Shit.”

Daryl stepped over you, pulling his arrow out of the corpse, “I’m serious.”

You finally got your legs under you, and the first thing you did was back a good distance away from him. There was no getting out of this, you both knew that Daryl would know if you lied to him. Yet, he was one of the last people in the prison you felt comfortable telling. Daryl was a classic redneck, with a bigot older brother and a taste for mysteriousness. There was so much you didn’t know about him, and the hair on the back of your neck stood up like a wildfire. You would have much rather told Carol or even Michonne, if you had to choose.

“You know what Bob said.”

“Yeah,” he stated, “but you ain’t an alcoholic. I know that much.”

“I’m not, but that wasn’t the point. I only came on this run for one thing, and it isn’t medicine. It’s testosterone.”

“Why do you need that? You’re strong enough without that steroid shit.”

“I don’t get as much as you do naturally.”

“So a medical condition?”

“Kind of.”

“Even if it was, that don’t explain why you had to sneak away from the group to get it. What’re you hiding?”

“I’m transgender, Daryl. I wasn’t born a boy like you,” you murmured.

There was a parade of footsteps down the hallway, and Tyreese burst through the door, the others close behind. He looked spooked, with sweat dripping down his disheveled face. Michonne and, speaking of the devil, Bob looked no better off.

He exclaimed, “Jesus, there you two are. We gotta go, now.”

“What, why?”

“Walkers. Tons of ‘em. Let’s go!”

You gladly took this chance, shoving past Daryl to dart out into the hallway with the others. Everyone else was rushing, but it was a minute before you also heard footsteps behind you. The infected corpses swarmed the building, even though it wasn’t like that before, and it made you wonder what the hell released them. Your group ran up the stairs with walkers not too far behind, and those trapped banged on whatever surface they could reach.

“There was a ledge near the fire escape,” Michonne hissed, “we can go through there.”

No one responded unless a quick nod could be considered one, and you were off. Michonne went first, then Tyreese, you, and finally Daryl. Your legs were shaking, and you paid Bob a glance. He tensed up, seemingly trying to gauge the distance, before jumping. He was barely right, and landed a little too close to the edge, teetering off. His arms flailed and an army of bodies from below swarmed up to grab his heavy bag. You rushed to catch him, attempting to pull the man up, but he refused to let his backpack go.

Finally, you ripped both the man and his bag away from the grasp of the walkers, panting, “What the fuck were you doing? What’s in that bag that could possibly be so important?”

“He’s right.” Daryl took the bag from Bob, zipping it open.

Bob rushed to stop him, but it was too late. Daryl dropped the backpack as quick as he picked it up, and he seized Bob by the collar.

“If I ever catch you puttin’ a bottle before a need, I’ll feed you to the walkers myself. You hear me?”

You froze as Daryl let the shorter man down, pushing him as he did so. Everyone else shot him a disappointed look or a glare, and Michonne waved her hand. You were all to keep moving; the run was over, and on an especially sour note.

The group arrived back to the prison safe and sound, the most daring of injuries being bruises, or small cuts. Tyreese and Michonne left to do their own activities, while Bob left to lick his wounds. This retired Daryl and yourself alone, to an awkward silence. With nothing else to do, you picked at a particularly nasty cut on your forearm. It was starting to look infected.

You cleared your throat, “Do you have anything left in your bag?”

“Yeah.”

“Mind if I use some?”

“Nah.” Daryl tossed you his bag.

Carefully, you peeked inside. There wasn’t much left, some disinfectant spray and vials of a clear liquid. No, that couldn’t be, could it?

Testosterone. At least three good vials of it.

You raised them up to your face, not believing your eyes, “Daryl, where the hell did you get these?”

“Grabbed them from that drawer you found the others in,” he refused to make eye contact, “after you left.”

“Why?”

“You might’ve needed more than you got.”

That… meant a lot to you. You had expected him to at the very least ignore you, or even worse, disgusted by you. What were the chances he would grab extras for you, just in case? Instead of yelling or hitting or kicking you out of his life, Daryl did that. If you were being honest, this was one of the weirdest coming out stories to date, but nothing can really beat zombies being included.

“You aren’t mad?”

“Nah. I’m a little confused, though.”

“On the topic?”

Daryl sighed, “Yeah. Wasn’t educated that much.”

“Well, if you want, I could help with that.”

Just for a second, he looked you in the eyes. In that moment, you didn’t see hate, anger, or anything negative. Only a sharp, beautiful glimpse of curiosity.

“Yeah.”

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ultraviolet-cello · 3 months

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Aw man. Today's the last day of @tristampparty and I am surprisingly sad about it. I'll be catching up the days I missed at some point, but I've chucked all that I've written, including today, into a google document and I apparently wrote 7.5k words over the course of episode 6 to today.

That's! A Lot!

I really wanna thank everyone who reblogged and gave me their additional thoughts/commentary, and special thanks to Revenantghost for organizing this whole thing! you do good work for this fandom i am giving u a gold star

With that, here we go into Episode 0 - High Noon at July. CWs for pregnancy discussion and a less detailed than last time but still present analysis of sexual assault and transphobia, marked with a [CW] Ofc, spoilers for Trimax and Tristamp

Cowboy kid Knives is something u can pry from my cold dead hands but it's also,,, I don't watch a lot of westerns, but the way Knives describes it seems like he likes the high action and justice. Which yea. yeah.

A lot of ppl interpret Vash then saying that he doesn't like that sorta stuff as him having always had pacifistic tendencies but I don't really read it that way? I just see him being rather similar to Trimax Vash - chill kid with his own interests and hobbies and Knives being the very oversensitive kid so outshines him initially.

Regardless of version of Trigun (except 98. 98 didn't know shit about knives lmao), Vash and Knives have always started off wanting to coexist and be peaceful; it's just how they reacted to it later that differs. In this case, Knives wants to stand up for his friends and make a peaceful world through that, and Vash is more passive in that he just wants to have faith in humanity.

Not to mention they are kids. Young, idealistic kids. This is pre-Tesla, they don't know the extent of how horrible the world is. The loss of innocence and subsequent breakdowns relating to The Horrors is yet to come.

[CW] Mmmmm they really don't make the pregnancy imagery subtle now do they dfgkjdfjk

I also think there's like - merit in also interpreting Knives as trans. Not Just because i think he's also very trans coded (A lot of his breakdowns and story arcs have reflections in how some trans men overcompensate masculinity in a Bad Way. That's a very small subsection of trans guys btw but I am speaking from experience. I got better tho). Anyway it makes the fact that Knives is disregarding Vash's bodily autonomy very much Worse if you take the male plants are trans analogy into it.

He's so far gone that he's willing to do to Vash what would be the worst thing to be done to him; Violating his body to rebuild and make him a perfect independent ("remind him of biological reality"), physically overpowering him ("taking the aggressor, commonly masculine role in sexual assault") to do what he wants. Disregarding the wants and needs of the Plants ("women +fem-presenting ppl that he originally set out to protect because he knew their experience and wanted to help and still has that trauma from witnessing that trauma")

Ofc that's just a reading of the scene, but I quite like it as a trans guy because that makes a really good villain with trans themes/motifs! I hate him so much (affectionate)

No, no she doesn't. Meryl is making a choice and she's gonna damn well stick to it! She's been given agency and she's gonna spend it in the most eldritch horrific scene that someone on that planet could spend it lmao. Well, no Knives takes most eldritch and horrific. Meryl's second tho

Okay this fucking scene drives me INSANE. This is a memory, clearly, but it's one that's being tampered with. Vash asks Knives if they can get along with humans, and then Knives immediately messes with the memory to make sure that he says that he'll protect Vash no matter what. But that is very clearly not what was originally said, so... What did he say? What was present day Knives so desperate to cut off?

I've talked about the narrative being biased against Knives a lot, but something I haven't talked about is that Knives kinda tries to contribute to that narrative a lot. He wants to seem like he never cared about humans, he wants to seem like he always planned this and was going for justice ever since he was a kid. He tells Vash the Tesla incident was just a small grain of sand, he uses Luida to tell everyone he wants to kill Rem, he's unbearably cruel to Vash to make his point. The only difference is that he wants to be right.

So he doesn't let us see what the kid version of him says, because that would contradict the narrative he's built for himself.

I really wanna give props to Studio Orange here for both the design and way they modelled the wing here, that's a really difficult task when the guy you're putting a wing on has a tight as hell bodysuit. But the anatomy holds up surprisingly well!

Also many people have pointed out that the plant mech looks a lot like Rem, and Knives staring into the face of a Plantish representation of his mother that is created and controlled subconsciously by his brother and saying he was rejected is. It sure is a scene!

ONCE AGAIN. INCREDIBLE EFFECTS. I also would like to once again point out the angelic motifs of Knives' design here.

Also Vash saying this is SO important because Meryl!!! is so important!!! I see a lot of people brush Meryl's space in the story off and it Enrages me because Meryl is one of the most important people to Vash. Aside from our frontline yaoi soldier Nicholas D. Wolfwood, Meryl has one of the most tangible impacts on Vash's character.

When Vash is in his breakdown in Trimax, Meryl is the one to kneel at his side and believe in him; When Vash is having his god awful horrible mindscape time in Tristamp, Meryl does the same. When Meryl is kidnapped in Trimax, Vash instantly jumps out of a window in the chance of getting her back. Vash trusted her enough to fire the ion cannon in the sand steamer episode. He immediately went to July the moment she and Roberto were kidnapped.

Meryl has so much faith in Vash and she's insane for that, but Vash recognizes her and that faith pays off in giving him the strength to carry on. He heard her voice, too :]

Also oh to be floating slowly down to the floor while you're a meter away from a cube with the power of an atom bomb while someone named Millions Knives is summoning millions of knives in front of u. Meryl has guts, man.

And now that Vash has gotten his gun back, he's back to using it as a tonfa! (check I think my analysis of episode 7 for more on that). Watching for the swing blocks, the forearm guard, and thwacking the knife tendrils out of the way

This fight scene has soooo much love and care and detail in it I love it so much actually. From seeing Vash's bullets to all the expressions and beautifully detailed firing, there's so much detail in a quick space that you really have to slow it down to see everything.

Seriously how strong is Knives to be able to have a feasible chance again Vash's prosthetic - and Vash matches him! Also the chomp

Now something that I have the shakiest of theories on is that after summoning The Cube, Vash starts moving in a far more controlled manner, he stands still when reloading, he has his movement flurries and then stands still to aim. Which uh. Studio Orange works in 3d, but those are 2d animation techniques. He's moving like 98 Vash.

There's a lot I admire about Studio Orange's use of 3d (I am a mid-tier 2d artist lmao) but I love love love that they're able to get all these really nice, creative camera shots that would be impractical in 2d (all those overhead shots, for example, have a chance of turning about bad/looking weird in 2d, and puts more strain on animators, but 3d you have the models from every angle already. 3d isn't easier by any means, but it does have its strengths)

Also. how Did Wolfwood get over here, dare I ask. mans climbed a tower in just a few minutes what is Wrong with him

Also a nice detail, Vash usually has perfect trigger discipline, but he falters here against Knives, probably because he's been already shooting, but hey, he's stressed. I'll give him a break.

I also appreciate exactly how superhuman Wolfwood is now. Tristamp Wolfwood is on a different level. Like 98 Wolfwood is just some (attractive) guy, Trimax Wolfwood has a lot of gory body horror going on and a subtle kind of endurance/strength, but Tristamp Wolfwood just jumped off a very tall building holding a grown woman and the Punisher and was fine.

Oh hey, same symbol on the tower as was on the sandsteamer and on Vash's wanted poster - symbol of July, probably

Very horribly, Knives probably did just save Vash's life here. But also the rest of July's life (though ofc he just extended the timer)....

I'm not quite sure When Vash started using plant bullets, but he's definitely using them now. Also the nails on his prosthetic are a nice touch!

THE FLYING SAUCER STRIKES AGAIN. I wonder if that's gonna be the basis of the Ark, if that's the route season 2 goes.

I also. Was that allI the Plants collected that escaped in this, or were there a bunch still running in July that get obliterated too? Did Knives inadvertently cause the death of more plants? I mean, when Knives gets revived in Trimax he definitely causes the death of at least 2 plants (there are a couple of bulbs in the background of the blast radius, plus the one that was used to revive him... she uh. Didn't look like she was doing so hot)

Vash's little speech is always so,,, intense. He has such a strong sense of character and it's admirable how well he sticks to his morals despite it all.

On a more body horror note, Knives can survive a long fucking time trying to grab The Cube. In Trimax he gets hit with the angel arm and practically disemboweled instantly, but Tristamp Knives can take over a minute of just like. being right in the direct path of fire. They're really gonna have to work to reconstruct him. Good luck, Legato!

UFO SPOTTED !!! LEAVING JULY AS IT IS DESTROYED !! NOT CLICKBAIT !!!

^ I made that long ago and needed to use it somewhere dfgkjdfg

[RAUCOUS CHEERING]

And ofc I have to bring up Eriks :] I don't actually have too much to say abt him. Studio Orange strip this man and make him bark like a dog next season or we will riot

CHRONICA MENTION!!!!! YAYYYYYY

And that's kinda. It.

Man I have had such fun over the last 12 days, I've really discovered a love for analyzing and theories and putting that out there and chatting with people about Trigun :] I should do this more often lmao but I do want to get back to drawing. I'll find a balance, then!

Thank you all for coming, and Wow if you made it this far I must be doing something right lmao.

#cli speaks #trigun #trigun stampede #tristampparty #cli analysis

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doberbutts · 4 months

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Gathering entertainment before top surgery and like. Okay.

So my mother has insisted on being my caretaker which is fine I *guess* because she is *trying* to make an effort to chill out with the transphobia (after 18 years but whatever I guess) BUT my mom is historically A: a prude, B: fussy about curse words, and C: an extreme pacifist. Like. Got mad at me and grounded me the first time I chose a jrpg over harvest moon because I said that I was bored of a conflict-free world all the time and wanted more action, extreme pacifist.

I'm gunna try to finish Elden Ring before my surgery bc I think it's going to raise my blood pressure way too high during my recovery period (I'm currently stuck in Caelid 70 hours in). I'm almost done with Cult of the Lamb which I know for a fact I need to finish before my mom has a chance to be mad that I'm playing it. No co-op games because my friends all swear freely esp when running away from ghosts and/or monsters.

So my list as it stands is:

Horizon Forbidden West

Forspoken

FFXVI

FFVII Rebirth

Baldur's Gate 3*

And games I'm partially through but could probably pick back up are:

NEO: The World Ends With You

Y's 8

Y's 9

The last like 3 chapters of Fire Emblem Engage (I'm having trouble being motivated to finish it bc the ending is turning out to be dumb- it was okay/mid while it lasted and had some genuine fun moments but this ending is hmm)

Various Of Mana games I nabbed for nostalgia and then forgot to do anything with

Tales of Berseria**

*There is no possible way I can play BG3 with my mother present because I'm going to romance my sadboy hot vampire elf and he says fuck many times and I don't feel like having her judge me about it and listening to the lecture while I can't escape her for 2-3 weeks. Not to mention the sexual content in that game.

**The aforementioned jrpg I bought when I got bored with Harvest Moon was a Tales game and there's always a chance she's going to remember that and once again be mad at me about it 🙄

And like. I don't need any more suggestions or anything I'm just like. God damn why is my to-do gaming list literally all things that my mother is going to be mad about me playing while she's in my house.

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deancasbigbang · 7 months

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Title: Lay Your Weary Head To Rest

Author: angelofthequeers

Artist: eggchef

Rating: Explicit

Pairings: Dean/Cas, background Sam/Eileen, Dean/OMC (one-sided under a spell), very brief mentions of past Dean/OMC

Length: 22000

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Transphobia (both internalised and external) Homophobia (in the past, from John including the f-slur) Dubious consent

Tags: Episode AU: s15e18 Despair, Angst with a Happy Ending, Post-Canon, Human Castiel, Mind Control, Trans Dean Winchester, Smut

Posting Date: October 23, 2023

Summary: They've beaten this plot point to death, dancing around each other and wallowing in miscommunication and things unsaid. So why should this time be any different? Oh, yeah. Because Chuck's gone. And Cas is human now, all thanks to Dean. Surely this whole miscommunication won't backfire on them when they take on what seems to be a shifter case involving people killing their lover and then themselves. Surely not.

Excerpt: “Why does this sound like a goodbye?” is all Dean’s voice can say. He already knows the answer before Cas ever opens his mouth. “Because it is.” No. Don’t. Dean opens his mouth but before he can stop Cas – “I love you.” Dean shakes his head madly. Take it back! Take it back! he’s tempted to shriek like a child. But take-backsies doesn’t exist for this. For…that. THUD. “Don’t do this, Cas.” Dean’s voice hitches. But then there’s a wet sound, a chittering, and Dean already knows before he turns what he’s going to see: a mass of black goo squeezing itself between the bricks, sighing into existence, ready to take the one person who’s seen Dean at his lowest, at his ugliest, and chosen time and time again to stay, to believe in him, to… I love you. I love you. Don’t do this. SLAM. The door finally bursts open and Billie stalks into the room, murder glinting in her eyes. “Cas…” Cas rests his bloody hand on Dean’s shoulder. His left shoulder. The handprint shoulder. Dean gasps in a breath. “Goodbye, Dean.” Dean shakes his head wordlessly. Cas tenses, like he’s about to throw Dean away, discard him like everyone else who’s ever loved him, but Dean grabs the lapels of Cas’ trench coat. He squeezes. He shakes his head again. “No,” he forces out. “Don’t leave me. Please.” Cas doesn’t say anything. He just stands there with that tearful smile that makes Dean want to punch him in his stupid, handsome face and Dean scrambles for some way – any way – to keep Cas here, to save him from the Empty…to make him stay. “Let me come with you,” Dean begs in a twisted mockery of Cas’ plea before he’d gone to face Amara. “I’ll come with you, Cas.” “No.” Cas shakes his head. “You can’t. Humans don’t belong in the Empty. And even if you could come, I wouldn’t let you. I’m saving you, Dean.” Humans don’t belong in the Empty. The rejection stings, burns like alcohol on a fresh cut, ensuring that Dean knows damn well that he’s never been able to follow Cas like Cas has followed him. All he’s ever been able to do is keep Cas with him, except for all the times Cas had flown off on him. Typical flighty angel, always spreading his wings, taking flight, leaving Dean in the dust – Dean freezes. His breath crystallises in his chest. Could he…would it…does he dare to hope… “Humans don’t belong in the Empty.” “Dean?” Cas tilts his head, still smiling. Something slithers behind Dean, chitters in his ear, rasps in the air, and he draws a deep, rattling breath into his porcelain lungs. “I’m sorry, Cas,” he chokes.

DCBB 2023 Posting Schedule

#dcbb 2023 #fic preview #2023 promo #deancas #destiel

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so-i-grudgingly-joined-this-site · 1 year

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“I tried so hard, and got so far, but in the end, it doesn’t even matter”:

The Awkward Meta-Tragedy of Neil Gaiman’s The Sandman

In which I thoroughly (over-) analyze the ending of this classic work in seven parts, with perhaps gratuitous references to 2000s pop music thrown in. The introduction and links to subsequent posts are below:

[Note: a link to a google doc containing the whole essay will also be at the end of this post, if you'd rather read it in that format instead of clicking links to the separate pages]

Introduction

I was warned that Neil Gaiman’s book series The Sandman was a tragedy. A post on tumblr, circulated not long after the successful Netflix adaptation’s first season released, warned new fans to not get their hopes up, to understand that the books were a Literary Tragedy to be taken seriously, and not to get carried away with fun cutesy shipping without the knowledge of what the source material would be like. However, the post carefully, and helpfully for those hoping to avoid spoilers, did not say in what manner the books constituted a tragedy.

So, when I first came to the end of the final installment of the series, I was shocked.

This was not like any tragedy I’d expected. And it felt… icky. It felt incredibly, shockingly, pessimistic.

Needless to say, massive, MASSIVE spoilers from here on out—you have been warned. Also content warning for discussions of depression, suicidal ideation and suicide, mentions of misogyny, and mentions of transphobia.

Also note that this isn’t intended as necessarily negative towards the original work, but more about the common fandom interpretation of it, as well as acknowledgment that, for better or worse, it is “of its time” and doubtless going to come across differently to a modern first-time reader. Also, this is just my own interpretation, I’ve been told I tend to interpret things pessimistically, and I’ve only just read the books as of 2022, so I in no way position this as a definitive analysis, nor even necessarily a correct one.

Continue to:

Part 1: Tragic, but not a Tragedy… Unless you get weird about mental health

Part 2: Hob Gadling—How to win by doing nothing?

Part 3: “Façade”—So much foreshadowing, so little time

Intermission: A Midsummer Night’s Dream

Part 4: Damn Daniel, Back at it again with the (symbolic) white vans

Part 5: “It sure is exhausting always rooting for the anti-hero”: Should We Even Care?

Part 6: “I reject your reality, and substitute my own”: Maybe There is Hope After All

UPDATE: I have also written a "bonus chapter" of this, focusing on Season of Mists, HERE

Tagging those I believe interested: @duckland @roguelov @notallsandmen @lizajane2 @ambercoloredfox

@serenityspiral not sure if you want to read this before you finish the books, because this is literally about the ending and it might kinda ruin the experience if you're completely spoiled

@onehundredandeleventropicalfish I'm gonna be bold and tag you and hope I'm not completely wrong

#the sandman #the sandman comics #the sandman comics analysis #the sandman comics meta #neil gaiman's sandman #literary analysis #original post #my writing #masterpost #the sandman comics spoilers #sandman essay

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chxrrylime · 1 year

Text

❝ soap pun. ❞

GHOST ANON REQUEST IS NEXT!! I just could not get this out of my fucking head...

Soap x FTM!Reader ↪ 1892 words — 18+ / SMUT.

Content tags — trans male submissive reader, cis male dominant Soap, unsafe sex, fem terms used for trans male reader’s genitals, mild overstimulation, referenced/implied transphobia, reference to a interrogation/torture scene, mention of pregnancy, vaguely established relationship, Cpt. Price’s trans ex-girlfriend, cunninglingus, pussy worship, very mild breeding kink, mild size kink, penetrative sex, and vaginal sex.

You and Soap had gotten rather close over the last few weeks or so—ever since he nearly compromised the mission in El Sin Nombre’s compound (the one you’d insisted on going with him on) just because of Valeria getting a little handsy with you following her purred “I like this one.”

She hadn’t appreciated Soap growling to stay away from you, and in all honesty Soap hadn’t planned on saying anything until the words were out of his mouth. It wasn’t until after he realized he’d been jealous. Protectively so. Luckily, things had worked out, and the two of you escaped with El Sin Nombre relatively unharmed.

However, Soap wasn’t a man to sit and wait on those types of feelings. After things had died a bit down with the Al Qutala–Narcos–Russians fiasco he’d pursued you, and you’d happily let him.

It was really the same old same old, just without the rest of the squad. The two of you at the bar together, or playing poker in either of your quarters. A few nights spent in each other's cots. You’d kissed a few times, heatedly made out once. Testing the waters.

Of course, until now. Johnny had hit the shower after sparring with Ghost and couldn’t stop thinking about you—had marched his way right to your quarters. It was late, but not late enough for you to be asleep.

You hadn’t had the chance to tell Soap about your… situation. Price was the only one who knew taskforce wise, and he made sure it stayed a need-to-know basis type of thing. Doctors and certain higher-ups and the like.

But Price accommodated you. Let you use his private shower so you wouldn’t be subjected to the group ones. Said he’d had a girlfriend years and years ago that had been trans—said he’d started and ended enough bar fights protecting her, and that he wasn’t particularly inclined to be throwing fists in the task force if he could avoid it. Not that he suspected any of the close knit soldiers would, but there were friends he’d had back then he’d thought the same about, only for them to end up in a bloody pile on the floor.

You hadn’t really had found a good moment to tell Johnny. You knew he was bisexual, so odds were in your favor, right? He seemed like a pretty laid back guy. Live and let live, maybe, ‘long as you weren’t hurting anybody. But there was always that niggling fear that he wouldn’t be into it, or that he’d be entirely repulsed, or that he’d hurt you.

And so it isn’t until he’s lowering down your body, trailing kisses over your shirt-clad chest, making his way down to your crotch, that you start to feel anxious.

“You don’t seem as excited—getting a little shy here,” Soap chuckles, nuzzling his stubbled cheek where your packer lumps in your pants.

“Shut up,” you shoot back light-heartedly.

“I’m teasin’. Takes a lil’ bit to get you there, huh?”

“You could say that,” you breathe.

“I do love myself a challenge,” he smiles, leaning back to quickly tug your pants and boxers down in one swoop. The packer of course goes with it, and you hold your breath, staring at the wall caught between desperately wanting to see Soap’s reaction and being too terrified to know.

“Fuckin’ hell…” he groans. You jolt slightly, shivering as a thick calloused thumb swipes curiously through your folds, “damn beautiful, this. You just get better n’ better, love.”

“You don’t mind?” You eye him warily, mind going a little fuzzy already from how he continues to thumb just above your mound.

“You know my preferences. It’s just the best of both worlds, yeah? Lovely braw like you with an even prettier pussy—shite, uh, if those type o’ words are, y’know, fine with you,” he tacks on, demeanor shifting to something a little more nervous, like he’s worried he might’ve offended you. The thought makes you smile.

“I don’ mind, Johnny,” you murmur, looking up at him eyes half-lidded, cheeks flushed.

Johnny smiles soft, eyes tracing back down to your folds, his smile turning into a sharp grin as a thick glob of slick leaks from your hole and between your cheeks.

“Aye, I don’t think she minds either,” he chuckles, reaching down to spread your folds for a better view. He thumbs at your cocklet, staring enraptured. He’s never seen one before—a clit so engorged and thick. It looks so much more like a small little cock than a normal clit, and he curiously pulls the thick foreskin down over the little mushroom head before leaning down to lick at the sensitive little nub with the tip of his tongue, wondering if you’re just as sensitive there as a cis man.

He gets his answer when you gasp high and squeaky at the sudden overstimulation, his tongue swiping down beneath the ridge at the little bumps there. It makes you burn with pleasure, like a raw wound being dug at. Soap growls when you grip a hand tight in his mohawk, tugging hard at the strands. The vibrations make you moan in return, his mouth moving to envelop the rest of your cock in hot, wet suction, bobbing his head ever so minutely up and down the small length.

Soap looks pure blissed out, eyes—darkened by his enlarged pupils—staring up at you hazily, or fluttering shut as he moans and growls against your cunt, licking into your fluttering hole. His bulky arms are looped around your legs, hands holding hard onto the fat on the top of your thigh, grip squeezing and desperate.

The assault on your pussy quickly crescendos, the overwhelming heat in your lower tummy bursting as you rock your hips against his mouth, facefucking him as you cum.

Soap fucking whimpers, lapping desperately at your leaking slick like he’s worried he can’t get it all into his mouth fast enough. He licks you long after you’ve finished, making your hips twitch with overstimulation.

When he finally pulls away, your body’s lax and loose, and you realize it’s probably exactly what he wants, and even though you know how loving and caring Johnny can be it still surprises you when he puts an arm either side of your head, holding his weight above you as he noses at your jaw until you bare your neck to him.

He presses sucking kisses to the flushed skin there, his hips rocking gently against your thigh. You can feel his hard cock through his jeans, how it jumps and twitches in the fabric everytime you whimper or moan from his attention.

He pulls back, hand gently cupping your chin to make you look up at him. He smiles so, so soft. It makes your heart flutter and drop.

“Would you wanna go further with me, love?”

You hum, hand in his short hair again to pull him closer to you, mumbling a “fuck yes,” as your lips collide. He groans, kissing you slow and forceful—with an intent you can’t quite decipher.

“Good boy,” he rumbles.

You can feel, can hear, as he starts to try and shimmy out of his pants without separating your mouths. You worm your arm down to grab at his wrist and he pauses, looking up at you with questioning eyes.

“Leave them on?”

He smiles.

“Anything you want.”

He sits up, reaching down to go and pull himself out, but you stop him again. You sit up with him, which he didn’t quite expect. Then you’re tugging at the hem of his shirt.

“Off,” you demand. He happily obliges you, lifting his arms to help you pull it off.

You’re immediately on him, hands cupping his weighty pecs, thumbing at his pert nipples. He bites his lip, pectoral muscles flexing as he arches into the touch.

You lean forward to lick at his nipple, taking the hard bud into your mouth to suck hard. He groans, a hand resting gently at the back of your head, neither pushing nor pulling.

“That’s damn good,” he groans, low and rough. You hear the shuffle of fabric and open your eyes, pulling back to see Soap’s cock, thick and hard and dripping as he furiously strokes himself, biting back his gravelly noises.

“Johnny,” you purr. He opens his eyes—doesn’t remember having closed them—and meets yours half-lidded and drunk, “fuck me already.”

He steadies the hand on his cock, holding it tight at the base as his free hand gently pushes at your chest to lay back. He positions himself, hauling you into his lap with only one hand on your hip. He slaps his cock against your mound, groaning at the wet crack that emits.

“Condom?” He grunts—sounds out of it. Less than an afterthought as he starts to gently slide his cock between your slick folds.

“No,” you grunt, arching your hips until you feel his cockhead catch on your hole, “can’t knock me up.”

“Christ, isn’t that a thought,” he huffs with a smile, starting to press his hips forward, your muscles still lax from your orgasm providing little resistance.

“Fucckk,” Soap groans out as he slides into the hilt, “mmm, y’little cunt’s squeezin’ me so tight…”

“Fucking hell, Johnny—“ you gasp out at his words, back arching and hips pressing down, feeling how the thick girth of his base spreads your entrance that ever slight bit more.

He starts to rock his hips, quickly picking up a brutal pace that has you clawing at his back. He shivers at the thought of the other’s seeing the markings later in the showers. Wonders if they’ll be able to tell who did it. He sucks a hickey onto your shoulder for good measure.

“Listen to ‘er squelch,” he growls, teeth bared against your throat as your face heats. He’s right, though—the obscene, wet sounds of your pussy adjusting to his massive girth sends a thrill through the both of you.

You’re unbelievably wet, slick gushing out of you nonstop. He can feel it against his balls every time they slap against your ass, and they draw up tighter at the sensation each time.

Soap’s rambling something in scots against your ear, voice deep and gravelly as he rocks into you. The denim of his jeans rubs your thighs deliciously raw, cunt squeezing tight around the other’s cock from the onslaught of sensations.

Your orgasm sneaks up on you, though not unexpected. It rocks through your body, vision whitening as your hole spasms around Soap’s pulsing length. He shouts your name as he cums mere seconds after, burying to the hilt, thick ropes of spend filling your insides, hot and sticky.

He groans through it, hips rocking jarringly as your pussy coaxes every last drop from him. He stays buried in you, even as he softens, carefully resting his weight upon you with a satisfied moan. You pet at his hair, the both of you coming down from your highs ever so slowly.

Soap sniffs, pets at your hip, and glances up at you through thick lashes.

“When I pulled your pants down? There was a good second there I’d thought your pecker had fallen off,” he grins.

You push him off of you with a laugh and he tackles you back down, struggling to kiss you through the both of your wide smiles.

#modern warefare 2 #mw2 2022 #john mactavish x reader #modern warfare #soap x reader #mine #smut #trans male reader

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