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anaalnathrakhs · 2 months

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i feel it's so fucking stupid and ungrateful but it still hurts a little when someone gifts me something i just don't like. i don't know. i know it's dumb and inaccurate to astrain that much meaning to a simple gift, but it feels kinda like they don't know me. i guess it feels like people don't see me, like a reminder that the person i reflect and the person i feel like are incredibly different.

#two fairly recent examples jump to mind #last year my class did a secret santa #the guy who got my name barely knew me so instead he asked our litterature teacher for tips #i was doing an effort to participate a lot in her classes and discuss stuff and i felt like she was an adult i could really trust #and adult who Gets It #and she picked just. the wrong gift. a classical philosophy essay.#stuff i hate reading. stuff i hate thinking about.#i said thank you to both of them and tried to read it during christmas break still. but i was right. i hated it.#and this year's christmas #recently i tried patching things up with my parents and we are a lot more communicative now #so they've opened up that my demand not to receive any gifts was painful to them #so we had an agreement: we write open-hearted letters to each other on christmas.#and they can gift me something if they'd like but no pressure if they don't find anything they feel would be a good gift #bc i myself opened up about the whole ''inaccurate gift'' thing being one of the reasons i dislike receiving stuff #and guess what. christmas comes. they got me a printed card from an artist whose work we saw at a local art thing earlier that year.#that artist does mainly either plants or nice architecture. stuff i love.#they picked the ONE work of hers that doesn't look like that. some reinterpretation of the great wave of kanagawa #a piece which i dislike with a passion for aesthetic reasons #i had promised i'd be honest if their gift missed the mark but tbh i couldn't. it's just an aesthetic thing it's completely begnin.#it's not like they spent lots or tried to pick something that was USEFUL #so i smiled and the picture is hanging with other stuff in my room #and i thanked them and i can't express how genuinely glad i am we have a better relationship #but man i felt my heart break a little under the tree in that moment #idk #i know it's silly but it makes me feel weird. and cold.#broadcasting my misery #vent

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beepsbees · 1 year

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someone on twit requested i drew bearmon which reminded me of my digimon oc Koharu i had when i was a kid who was stuck in the digital world since kindergarten and was protected by a grizzlymon she rode around on

#digimon #bearmon #kumamon #grizzlymon #grizzmon #oc #koharu #digigraphic #is that the right tag?#someone please tell me the right digimon ags #one of the only other ocs from this story was my sisters oc naru who had a picodevimon who evolved into devidramon and finally lilithmon #i remember my sister got mad at me for giving her white hair bc it didnt fit into the current digimon design aesthetics at the time #(this was around?? when frontier was airing lol so no main white haired characters yet)#i was torn between her not aging while in the digiworld even tho its been years or growing up and when she went back the real world #itd only been a few days of her missing and now her parents had to deal with this child out of time

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angel-girl-2014 · 2 months

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when’s it gonna be my turn

don’t forget me

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barnbridges · 8 months

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there's something visceral about.... marion probably knows well enough that bunny doesn't have a fucking bank account at the age of 24 but randomly believed her friend when she said she saw him at a bank, that he randomly became obsessed with murder out of the blue one day and then died and his friends didn't miss him, that his best friend was absolutely ... a sight to behold at the funeral, that the corcorans are neither warm nor really fond of her (where is she talking to his mother? they were planning on having kids together and his parents never spoke to her the whole time she was there), that brady corcoran specifically is described as the least like bunny himself, that they invited "a ton" of people from hampden college but none of her friends (but random people they don't know??? and bunny didn't know that well either??? sure) are ever mentioned being there, they didn't even speak to her when he was presumed missing, but she went right back there and dealt with them for at least another 10 years, and tied herself to them eternally through blood.

#again love in this book is literally #the twisted and the ugly and the bizarre #a feeling that's not aesthetic nor is it really based off what's normal but rather what's visceral and raw and mildly rotten #and their relationship is just...#ripe #it's so.... 50s nuclear family but bunny corcoran never had a nuclear family. how can he desire something he never had.#the secret history #bunny corcoran #what does he even desire? we'll never know #anyway something visceral and ripe and rotten at the core in their relationship and they were married ok #they might as well have been #there's something so.... ugly #in everything they ever do #but at the same time what is true love if not trying to ressurect your dead boyfriend in richard papen words #“for reasons known only to themselves”#bitch they dont miss him #his parents dont care #they never cared #his brothers probably are too traumatized and emotionally stunted themselves to have one thought about it #she cares she brought him back #she's such a delulu girl i adore #her straight audacity

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calumsash · 2 years

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...But melt your headaches call it home

#here we have the second part!!! here's calum!#idk what he does.... maybe a model..... yeah he's just being pretty #but this mb is more about vibes... the vibes of going back to his hometown with ashton to show him where he grew up #make a little road trip out of it!!#they live in the vug city and yeah he grew to love it but also he misses the quiet of a small town #the puppy is his parents' but he really wants one as well he just needs to convince ashton now #they got ashton's kitty but they can make the family bigger #ok I'll check in when i have more in mind about this... if i do.... I'll probably will.......#5sos moodboard #aesthetic moodboard #calum hood

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nanixo · 9 months

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Me when I realized that I’ll never be the little girl my mom once loved again😝

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violentwxnter · 3 months

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tag drop: violet sage rogers

#visage:violet #violet interaction #answered // violet #aesthetic: violets bloom under the snow #and i see forever in your eyes || violet and landon #timeline: early days // violet & landon #timeline: main // violet & landon #timeline: honeymoon phase // violet & landon #timeline: in sickness and in health // violet & landon #timeline: first time parents // violet & landon #timeline: missing in action // violet & landon

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bepki · 4 months

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People online have turned Peanuts into something that it never ever was it is so strange to see

#like its fine if you think that like aesthetically snoopy is cute #i don't personally but just like #thats not his personality #and ive seen people ascribing this like quiet wholesome cosy optimism to peanuts comics that just #so wildly misses the general ethos of peanuts comics #im like who are you people #idk i grew up reading like every peanuts strip ever bc my parents had the book compilations #and like they are very close to my heart #but like the selection of strips that make it to getting a lot of notes on tumblr #are not an accurate sampling of like the average peanuts strip

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lifewouldbebetteronmars · 1 year

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✨My Name vs. What I Was Almost Named Trend✨

🧚🏻‍♀️Riley🧚🏻‍♀️

🎶McCartney🎶

Tags (no pressure):

@have-a-holly-jolly-angstmas @tessherongraystairs @wagner-fell @littlx-songbxrd

#it was totally a missed opportunity for my parents to not name me after a beatles member #source: pinterest #riley aesthetic #mccartney aesthetic #name challenge

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sadphoriac · 11 months

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POV: it's 2008 and you googled "Smashing Pumpkins desktop wallpaper" setting it up on your family computer with Windows XP.

#i miss that aesthetic #life was simpler #the amount of Naruto Ben 10 and Harry Potter shit i made my parents look at every time they opened computer was concering tho #billy corgan #the smashing pumpkins

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angel-girl-2014 · 2 months

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literally my parents

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bumblingbabooshka · 2 years

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Tuvok needs to be put in outfits

#fake dating au? CHILD'S play. fake MARRIAGE au!#Bc is it even your ship if one can't protectively go 'That's my wife!' on instinct only to realize seconds later what they said?#While I was drawing these I thought 'I can't imagine Tuvok going swimming shirtless'#also I can't imagine him cursing...I can imagine him dad-cursing. 'Damn' is the worst he gets. He's sworn off saying fuck.#50's aesthetic planet means the aliens are essentially looking at Pinterest 50's Aesthetic and modeled their whole planet after that #so there's no inequality or anything its just a sandbox for me to throw Voyager's characters around in #but mostly Tuvok #B'Elanna & Seven meet at work...OH my god...but not what if?? Repairman B'Elanna and housewife Seven #Tuvok would URGE to Chakotay to have a bath...if that is acceptable.#Tuvok gossips with the local housewives...both for their mission (information gathering) and also bc he has opinions on the local garden and #Susan's parenting choices. (they're bad)#Chakotay & Tuvok are the biggest homemakers on Voyager their little apartment would be LOVELY #Chakotay says its kinda fun playing house with you Tuvok and Tuvok says it reminds him of his time as a professor - he would often take care #of the home and children while T'Pel was away on doctorly assignments #and Chakotay asks if he misses them and Tuvok says it was certainly more fulfilling picking up /their/ dirty socks.(Was that a joke~!? / No)#also I love the trope of Someone who's definitely much weaker/less equipt jumping in to physically protect someone who's obviously stronger/#more capable so you KNOW Chakotay's going to 'save' Tuvok from someone. ('I could have handled the situation unassisted.' / 'In heels?' /#'Yes.')#And also for my last trick: Chakotay romance subplot with a random alien woman on the planet where he changes his mind about being with her #just as they're about to have sex because she says something that reminds him of Tuvok and they're NOT married not REALLY but......but......#he tells himself its because he couldnt be with someone who'd be fine with cheating but IS it that??? hmm...#Tuvok #Tuvok art #Chakotay #Chakotay art #Tuvok/Chakotay #st voyager #st voyager art

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faeriephia · 2 years

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more art 🧚🏼

i couldnt find the artist so if anyone knows please credit in comments.

i love this art piece so much bc it conveys a beautiful thing, a relationship between two wondrous creatures which to me is ethereal 🫶🏻

have a good day love u ☕️

- faeriephia 🧚🏼‍♀️

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bumbblebeewrites · 2 years

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As this hazy , wrenching night falls

I miss you papa

My throat is swollen and eyes all red

Sitting here , I miss your handkerchief papa

Anxiety and aching head ,

My sleep schedule is a mess

I miss your nostalgic stories papa

You taught me to fix things ,

Still I need your hug to fix me papa

Riding my bicycle , scooty and car

you taught me to operate everything

Still I miss holding your finger papa

You always helped me with every problem

Being all alone now ,

I miss your guiding voice papa

I'm all sleepy , still I'm working ..

I miss how you used to carry me out of the car papa

My eyes are all watery , and voice is breaking

I miss being your free little girl papa

I miss you a lot papa

#love #parents #missing home #poetsandwriters #literature #aesthetic #writers #poets on tumblr #writers on tumblr #spilled words #spilled writing #poetry

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chainreh · 2 years

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me earlier: hm tonight i will sleep at a regular time

me now: actually stays up to 5am listening to the sims 3 event music (like a boss)

#THAT BURGLAR THEME MAN... I'm going to have nightmares #i had so many nightmares about the sims as a kid its funny in hindsight #my parents banned me from playing for a few years bc it kept giving me nightmares ☹️☹️#also like. why does ts3 grim reaper theme go so fucking hard?#also watching these make me miss ts3 so much #its crazy. i loved the sound effects so much they scratch my brain in the right way #also imagine traits actually affecting how ur sim act and not just give them a moodlet for 2 hours occasionally 😁😁😁#like..idk ts4 just feels so lifeless to me #i also hate how when you start a new game it brings you into cas instead of the map view #and i kinda get it bc hey cool you can go to anyworld without massive loading screen #but the towns feel? lifeless? like #they have no sense of identity bc regardless of what town ur in ure gonna see all the same sims from the basegame towns...#its just a slightly different aesthetic #also i never feel inclined to play with the other townies in ts4 #i did that all the time in ts2 + 3 #none of them stick out to me at all. the only ones i can remember is the goths the landgrabs and the pancakes #i could not tell you any others who live in the towns. i cant even remember the names of the towns theyre that unimportant to me #ugh. sorry i hate that game so much its unreal 😭i dont want to hate it but i cant help myself #i am a little hater

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thomas-mvller · 8 months

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I was tagged by the legend that is iz aka @gxtzeizm ~ thank you! 😊

Rules: color stuff that applies to you and then tag your friends

Appearance:

i'm over 5'5" // i wear glasses/contacts // i have blonde hair // i prefer loose clothing to tight clothing // i have one or more piercings // i have at least one tattoo // i have blue eyes // i have dyed or highlighted my hair // i have gotten plastic surgery // I have had braces // i sunburn easily // i have freckles // i paint my nails // i typically wear make-up // i don’t often smile // i am pleased with how i look // i prefer nike to adidas // i wear baseball hats backwards.

Hobbies and talents:

i play a sport // i can play an instrument // i am artistic // i know more than one language // i have won a trophy in some sort of competition // i can cook or bake without a recipe // i know how to swim // i enjoy writing // i can do origami // i prefer movies to tv shows // i can execute a perfect somersault // i enjoy singing // i could survive in the wild on my own // i have read a new book series this year // i enjoy spending time with friends // i travel during school or work breaks // i can do a handstand.

Relationship:

i am in a relationship // i have been single for over a year // i have a crush // i have a best friend i have known for ten years // my parents are together // i have dated my best friend // i am adopted // my crush has confessed to me // i have a long distance relationship // i am an only child // i give advice to my friends // i have made an online friend // i met up with someone i have met online.

Aesthetics:

i have heard the ocean in a conch shell // i have watched the sun rise // i enjoy rainy days // i have slept under the stars // i meditate outside // the sound of chirping calms me // i enjoy the smell of the beach // i know what snow tastes like // i listen to music to fall asleep // i enjoy thunderstorms // i enjoy cloud watching // i have attended a bonfire // i pay close attention to colours // i find mystery in the ocean // i enjoy hiking on nature paths // autumn is my favourite season.

Miscellaneous:

i can fall asleep in a moving vehicle // i am the mom friend // i live by a certain quote // i like the smell of sharpies // i am involved in extracurricular activities // i enjoy mexican food // i can drive a stick-shift // i believe in true love // i make up scenarios to fall asleep // i sing in the shower // i wish i lived in a video game // i have a canopy above my bed // i am multiracial // i am a redhead // i own at least three dogs.

Tagging: whoever wants to do this! just say i tagged you 😄

#ask games #yaay!#about the italisized bits:#1) i HAD more than two piercings #one helix one (sort of) and snake bites #had to get them closed bc my school was religious so 😔#2) yeah so i had to get surgery but not for cosmetic reasons but rather to improve my life quality #and the professional who did it was a plastic surgeon bc they specialize in making sure things end up looking well aesthetically wise #which is why a normal surgeon didn't do the procedure but whatever!#3) my friends from school moved to other cities haha... but we used to hang out literally every week :// i miss those days #4) i think they'd do better if they werent but OH well #5) now this one is kind of tricky because i slept in cars twice when i was a kid #one bc my siblings and i wanted to sleep in my mom's car idk why only for her to wake up horrified after seeing we weren't there JAJAJJA #and the second time was when my parents and their friends decided to camp in a small village #and they used tents and all but i was absolutely not going to do that so i slept once again in my mom's car :D #and... that's it xdxd

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