#no preassure though

[darlingpassion]

I could sooooo hear Reba's dialogue from that last drabble in her voice!! It was so good. Really. I loved it so so much <3

Omg you really could?? That makes me so happy you could hear it in her voice!!! And, looking at your reblog, the fact that you thought she's in chatacter!!

I'm happy you loved it. Thank YOU for sending in the sentence starters! ^^

#reba #👮‍♀️~a cougar by the name of reba~👮‍♀️ #Lake Placid #asks #bro i LOVE your starters so much!!! #never be afraid to send in more if you want to! ^^ #(dont feel preassured though if you dont want to ^^)

[hydrngea]

𝖿𝗂𝗇𝗀𝖾𝗋 𝗉𝖺𝗂𝗇𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗈𝗇 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗌𝗄𝗂𝗇

a/n : ahhh i've been so busy lately but i finally got the chance to write this last night! rafe’s kinda ooc so I apologize in advance lol hope you enjoy <3

notes/summary : early mornings are for appreciating you | rafe cameron x f!reader, fluff, established relationship (you’ve been together for years) 

word count : 804

masterlist / latest rafe fic 

daylight unwraps the hues of the room while the sun shines through the window you had neglected to cover up last night. rafe rouses with the light, eyes straining open. 

it’s early; early enough for him to get up and close the curtains over the arbiture and fall back asleep with ease. but for some reason he finds himself too comfortable in the position he in right now-can’t get himself to abandon his spot on the bed and the warmth that radiates from you.

 he stretches closer beside you, turning to lay with his back towards the window and facing you. he leans himself against his palm while creating a barrier between you and the light. he’s glad you sleep on your stomach, means the sun won’t get into your eyes and you can stay asleep.

mindlessly, his free digits find the curve of your back and trace over your skin; the imprints of the wrinkled sheets left on your preassure points. the faded strech marks on the flip side of your arms. the freckles on your shoulder. 

he thinks his new favorite activity is finger painting over your features;t here’s just something about the way his calloused finger pads feel against the softness of your untouched complexion which could keep him occupied and content for hours.

rafe was never the inventive type, never good with shapes like an artist or spoken phrases like a poet. even with no knowledge of creative subjects he knew without having to study you for long that you were a work of art.

he thinks- even though he doesn’t know much about his existence- that god must of carved you just for him to admire. 

minutes pass. the tangerine mountains of the sunrise fade to the comforting yellow the of the day and the sky returning to its familiar morning blue.

his exhales synchronize with yours, the room filled with a comfortable silence which feels so underrated. 

you’re the one to break it, limbs shifting under the comforter you’ve mostly stolen off of him and lips smacking together as you awake. 

you lift your head from your pillow and look at rafe with unfocused eyes which are just beginning  to regulate to the abnormal amount of light that blankets the surface of the bedroom. 

“shouldve closed the blinds last night,” you say as  press your palms onto your eye sockets, and rafe can’t help but laugh. he pulls you on-top of him and you comply,  letting out your own breathy chuckle because of how clingy he’s acting so early in the morning. your nose grazes the side of his before you slump down over him, cheek resting on his bare chest and ear right over his heart. 

gentle lips brush on your hair and you melt on top of him, wrapping you own arms around his waist. he can feel your lips curving into a smile against his skin. “how long you’ve been staring at me?” you ask, head lifting from his chest to look at him.

“dunno.” he responds, voice still gruff. a hum exerts from you as you relax back into him. 

again the two of you fall into a warm silence, content with being within each others space. no words are said and he returns to stenciling you; drawing shapes and patterns while trying to memorize you shape and every minuscule detail about your body as if you’d disappear any moment. 

rafe thinks about all he didn’t do to deserve such a heaven sent gift like you. even after years together, there’s still a part of him who believes you deserve more, better. someone as pure as you. he thinks maybe he should express his gratitude towards you more often. 

he’s the one to cease the quiet this time, softly at first. “i feel like..” he fingers begin to drag over the same spot while he tries to come up with the right words to say. 

“like what?” 

“like you were made for me. like i was made for you.”

his words make you sit up, locking your eyes with his. “what has gotten into you today, mr. whipped cameron.” you whisper as you lower your mouth onto his and press a gentle kiss at the corner of his lips. 

 he chuckles into you, lightly squeezing your waist. “nothing.” 

 “nothing?” he lets out a sigh as you pull away with your brow furrowed.

“just promise me you’ll never leave.” 

“well if u keep saying stuff like that then why would i ever want to?” you say, dimples on display as your lips curve into a smile. 

he scoffs, and you let out a screech when rafe flips the two of you over so he hovers over you. your hands find his cheeks, and you lift yourself up just enough to meet him halfway. 

“i would never leave this.” you murmur against him, right before his lips spark over yours.

------------

taglist (let me know if you would like to be added!) : @mrsstarkey1 @of-many-fandomss @maybankslover @penny4yourthoughts 

follow and reblog and i’ll do the same for you! 

#rafe cameron #rafe #rafe fanfiction #obx #rafe x reader #rafe outer banks #rafe smut #rafe x y/n #rafe x you #rafe x female!mc #rafe cameron fic #rafe cameron x reader #rafe cameron x y/n #rafe cameron imagines #rafe cameron x you #rafe obx #rafe cameron smut #rafe cameron fluff #rafe cameron angst #drew starkey #drew starkey x you #obx fluff #obx3 #obx netflix #jj maybank x reader #jj fanfiction #jj maybank #john b routledge #john b #sarah cameron

[zaceial]

Todoroki Shoto as a partner HCs

Pairing; Todoroki Shoto x gn!reader

Tags; fluff, sfw, hurt/comfort if you squint

Content warning: I headcanon todoroki as autistic/neurodivergent, so there might be some references here and there + mineta being weird but that only lasts like one line

No use of y/n

Contains: Early stages, Affections, Who would know, PDA, His thoughts of the future

Requests open!

Early stages:

As a partner, during the early stages he'd be very nervous to make the first moves, because he isnt sure yet what you'd like or if you're comfortable with some things.

Would love it if you made the first move though

Like holding hands underneath the cafeteria tables, patting his hair as a 'good job!' after training or just slinging your arm around him

He loves it when you do any physical affection

Poor boy's touch starved, he'll take whatever he can get

Would love parallel play, something about just the two of you, sitting in peace and doing your own things

Its nice and quiet, he isn't overwhelmed and there isn't any preassure to do anything, just the both of you in each other's company

Gives you lots of small gifts, like keychains or fancy bookmarks, anything that suits your taste

One time he even got you a small little plushie and placed it on your desk with no explanation whatsoever

Cuddling comes awkward to him at first, but he comes around after a while

By a while I mean MONTHS

He's just not used to it, hugging is already awkward for him, so its hard for him to just lay in your arms for a long period of time

What does he do? Is there a correct way to cuddle? Should he be doing something? Where does he lay his head?

Would definitely search up 'cuddle poses' online

But he just gets even more confused and goes down a deep rabbit hole about cuddling

Affections/comfort:

When he does come around, that's the way he recharges at the end of the day

After a long day of work and socialising he just wants some peace, quiet and some cuddles from his partner

Would just walk in wherever you were, lie down on top of your torso and just stay there, eyes closed and breathing slowed as he calms down

Would rather be the one being held , adores it when you rub circles into his back to soothe him

Would just randomly lay his head on your shoulder whenever he's tired but can't properly sit down and rest during training

And then at this point, he's more comfortable with initiating stuff

He doesn't know what to do if you're ever in a situation that requires comfort

The boy's a bit dense, okay? He saw Momo crying and asked if she was feeling nauseous, then immediately told her there's a preassure point somewhere to relieve it

Offers you his favourite food or any sort of advice because those things are what usually helps him feel better

Would ask you whats wrong, and try his best to fix the problem instead of reassuring you since he's not really good with comforting people

"Whats wrong?" He asks upon entering the room and seeing you sitting down somewhere, eyes puffy and a frustrated look on your face.

"I'm just really overwhelmed, Shoto, all this work is putting stress on me.." You say, wiping your eyes even though the tears stopped a long time ago.

There was a moment of silence, Shoto stands in front of you, hands awkwardly raised up to his sides unsure of what to do.

"Are you hungry?" He asked, and you just look at him confused.

"I have leftover soba.."

You smile at him, standing up and making your way to the kitchen. He sits next to you and you both just share the plate in silence before he speaks again.

"If you're stressed next time, you can just tell me. I'll help you."

"I have notes for our classes to help you simplify everything. It is essential that a person rests appropriately and avoid overworking themselves." He says, and you can't help but smile, chuckling a little at how punctual he is.

Who would know?:

Isn't one to loudly declare he's in a relationship, in fact people didn't know until it slipped one day.

"Shoto, do you want to go out today?" You ask him whilst passing by the common room of the dorms, he was talking- well, engaging in a one sided conversation with some of your classmates.

"Woah, first name basis huh? You two must be close then Todoroki-kun"

"Well yeah, they're my partner."

"YOUR WHAT?!"

Everyone would bombared you guys with questions after that

Shoto just answers it shortly, keeping it simple

"When did you guys start dating?"

"Three months ago."

"A few months ago?! And you didn't tell us?? Man, i thought we were friends, Todoroki.."

"I hope this doesn't cause you both to slack off during exercises, your education is still important!"

"Wow Todoroki, have you guys done it yet?? Must be nice having a partner~"

Mineta immediately got kicked by you after that

Shoto's indifferent to making your relationship public, if you wanted to or don't want to, he's fine with anything

Would prefer the relationship to only be known to people he actually knew instead of like announcing it to everyone

Example: his class, friends, your family.

Although sometimes he might let it slip because he thinks about you alot in between classes

It would take time for him to talk about his relationship to his family, especially Endevour

Fuyumi would be you guys' #1 supporter and the first one to find out

Natsuo's a little more distant to shoto than Fuyumi is, so he'd be third to find out, right after his mother

Endevour would only be told after like 6 months of dating

Who knows, maybe Shoto would be spiteful enough to not even tell him for years

Public Display of Affection:

Shoto will hold your hands under tables or stay close to you by your side and hold hands if no one's paying attention.

Doesn't like PDA as much, at most he'll hold your hands and lay his head on your shoulder when you're out in public

He just doesn't like showing that very new and vulnerable side of him being affectionate to the world

Plus, it brings his guard down because he's fully relaxed if he's affectionate with you

Thoughts of the future:

Todoroki's the type of person to just slow down and be in the moment with you but then blurt about a highly detailed future with you out of nowhere

You would go shopping and you'd spot him eyeing a plant in a store

When you ask what he's thinking about, he with a straight face say:

"You said you like these. If we get one when we move in together, do you think the two cats we'll have will be disturbing these or would it be fine considering ragdoll cats are mostly known for their relaxed nature? "

"Shoto we haven't even graduated yet!"

If you're a hero too, he trusts you fully to take care of yourself during missions or any villain attacks

Would interfere if he has to, if anything were to happen to you during missions he'd be heartbroken

Going down a spiral of the things he could've done to protect you, to make sure you were safe

He also wouldn't hold back during any training just because your his partner, he believes you both need to grow strong together to become heroes

If you weren't a hero, he'd try his best to protect you if you were ever caught up in his hero nonsense

Totally supports any career you wanted to take up, claiming that he'll be the one to take care of everything financially

I mean, better use Endevour's card for SOMETHING

Wants at least one cat in the house, ragdolls specifically

Kids are not something he has in mind, especially considering he'd like to focus on you and his career

He also doesn't want to end up like his dad

Would consider children if you both are stable in your lives and careers

And if you don't want kids, he's fine with that too

The house would be remodeled into those old Japanese ones like his dorm room, if you didn't like it he'd have at least his work office that way

#todoroki x male reader #shouto todoroki #my hero academia #todoroki x reader #no use of y/n #boku no hero academia #bnha fanfiction #todoroki headcanons #gender neutral reader #fluff #relationship headcanons #shoto todoroki #autistic todoroki #neurodivergent todoroki

[nestasgalpal]

Can't think straight when we are together Pt. 2 [Nessian smut]

Part 1 | Part 3 | Part 4

Nesta’s Gal Pal masterlist | AO3

Tagging:@zoyaslai@champanheandluxxury@pataytayo@nessiantrashh@dustjacketmusings@saltydreamcollector@generalnesta@simpingfornestaarcheron@arinbelle@a-court-of-valkyries@azrielsgirl@swoopingoccamy@vasudharaghavan@vidalinav@sv0430@nessianforlife@claralady@sayosdreams@malluzia@dealfea@kylosmomm

A/N: Don't mind me, I'm just posting a second part to this a year after because I think I know what I want to do with this fic. It's been a year, so if you want to be removed or added to the tagging list, let me know, I just copied the one I had.

He had played well enough to celebrate the victory and mean it. It had been a great game. Tense, to say the least, but in a good way. The type of tense that pushed Cassian to do better. He was not the captain of the football team, Rhy was, but Cassian had been named MVP of the college league the last two seasons, and he planned on keeping the title this year as well now that graduation time was approaching and the draft peaked on the horizon. Preassure to give his all on the field was always welcomed. And if a certain pretty brunette showed up to watch, even if she was accompanied by some other dude, then his teammates could count on Cassian pushing himself to the limit.

Cassian slurred each syllable when he spoke, even if he wasn't drunk yet. "It's too hot in here, I need some air." Az only nodded. Not that the music being blasted through the speakers would have allowed him to be heard anyway. 

The crowd dancing in Feyre's basement, drinking and making out in the darkest corners of the room, forced him to use his elbows to push people in reaching for the stairs. Circumventing these college students proved as challenging as dodging some of his rivals hours earlier. Cassian tightly secured his red cup as he made his way up. Although Feyre's house was not their most frequent meetup place, Cassian had been in there enough times to know where each room was. To know the basement had a door to the garden behind the house, but if he instead used the stairs, he would find himself in the entry hall at the top.

So he went up, and just as he emerged in the predicted space, the front door was being opened by one of his best friends. Mor gave a squeak and jumped to hug him. "Congrats on the win, big boy!" Cassian hugged her back, and she had to go on her tiptoes so her arms could reach around his neck. He thanked her with a shit-eating grin. Both knew this had been one of his best games this season.

"Where were you? I was starting to think I would have to drain the keg all by myself." He joked, momentarily postponing his planned trip for this quick chat. 

"The cheer team had a pre-party I couldn't miss." Mor explained. Cassian didn't believed her, though, as most of the cheer team had arrived before him at the party.

"Excuse me." The soft voice behind them was followed by an even softer touch as Gwyneth Berdara slightly pushed his arm.

Only then did Cassian realize Mor and he were blocking the front door. He quickly let go of his friend's waist and took a step back, leaving enough room between the blond cheerleader and himself for Gwyneth to walk out. She did so without a word or a second look at them. The sudden panic taking over Cassian was enough to block the shame he should have felt instead. He saw the redhead reach for her phone as soon as she stepped outside, right before the door closed behind her. His widen his eyes went back to his friend, who seemed oblivious to the gravity of what had just happened. Only then did he notice who the varsity jacket Mor was wearing belonged to. A siren went off inside his head. Shit. Cassian hadn't noticed she was wearing his name and number. He had assumed it belonged to whatever player she had been screwing before coming to the party.

Surely Gwyn had noticed as well.

Shit.

"It that my jacket?" Obviously, it was. 

"Oh, yeah, sorry, I was cold and kept it. Do you want it back?" She offered it, but didn't take it off. She pouted, knowing he would let her keep it. It would be useless to ask for it now, anyway.

"I thought you gave it to Nesta. Like I asked you to." 

How tight had he and Mor been hugging when Gwyn appeared out of thin air? He wasn't sure. He tried to remember if his name on the back of the jacket had been visible to the girl, but soon discovered that he couldn't. A message had probably been sent from Gwyn's phone to Nesta's describing what she thought she had seen. She would be wrong in her assumption, but it kind of made his planned trip to the second floor redundant now, nevertheless.

"She didn't want it, Cass. I promise I offered it to her, and she said she already had a jacket. Now, I don't know if she meant hers or the jacket that guy besides her was wearing."

Cassian closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Shit Mor, you should have told me. I thought she had taken it."

"Hey, don't be upset with me. It's not my fault." She protested, her pouting lips now more exaggerated. "To be honest, I think this was for the best. Please, Cass, I am begging you to put two and two together and realize that she didn't want your name on her back because she simply doesn't want you. Or else, she wouldn't have gone to the game with a date."

His head snapped at that. "So it was a date? How would you know?" Cassian had always trusted Mor's intuition in this area. She understood girls' behavior way better than he did.

Taking the red cup from his hand and sipping from it, Mor rolled her eyes. "Listen, I don't want to hurt your feelings, especially not tonight, but Nesta Archeron doesn't give a fuck about football, so if her pretty ass was there, it had to be that guy's idea. And she must like him a lot to agree to the plan. Did she tell you she would be there?" He said no with his head. "And why is that? Because she..." Mor pushed a finger against his chest. "Doesn't. Care. About. You."

Cassian just stood there, unconvinced. He wished Mor had insisted more.

"But I still went up there to their seats and offered, like you asked me to, because I do care about you." She kept going. "As does Rhys. Do you think he would like to find out you are trying to get into Nesta's pants?" She arched an eyebrow. "You know he is not precisely fond of her."

The silence, Cassian hoped, let Mor know he was not in the mood to get deeper into that conversation right now. "Yeah, you are right." He considered taking his cup back, but decided not to. Mor could keep his cup and take it downstairs with her advice and opinions. He had to go up, he was now determined. "Az was asking for you down there." The cheerleader's face lightened when he changed the subject, suddenly reminded that there was, in fact, a party waiting for her in the basement.

"Shall we go?" She offered.

"I was actually looking for a bathroom." Cassian excused himself. "I don't trust the one downstairs." He joked. She didn't push it, she simply gave him another quick hug and headed towards the music.

He gave himself a second to clear his head. To mentally curse himself, Mor and this night that had seemed so full of potential until five minutes ago. The stairs to the second floor of the Archeron's house were right there. I should go to her room, Cassian told himself. To explain myself. And so, with the confidence only a guy like him could have, he resumed his original route towards Nesta Archeron's bedroom.

Unknown territory.

It would be easy for him to pitch himself tonight. Pitching both of them, actually, presents Nesta with the idea of what they could become. In a perfect scenario, Nesta would listen. In the case that Gwyneth had misinformed her of what she thought she had seen in the hall, it might require a little more convincing. But Cassian made his way up, truly believing this would be the night he told Nesta what he wanted.

Loud and clear.

The hallway he ended up in was silent, as if there was no party happening in the basement at that very moment. It was pitch dark, and wanting to be as sneaky as possible, instead of turning on the lights, Cassian used his phone's flashlight to find Nesta's bedroom door. A decorative piece of wood in the shape of a perfect "N" hang from the door. Knowing all the residents of the house except Feyre —downstairs— and Nesta herself —at the other side of the wooden panel— were away, he knocked, not allowing his confidence to slip away.

Yes, Nesta had refused to take his jacket when Mor offered it in his name, but not once had she said no to fucking him. If she knew he was on the other side of the door, she would open it for him. When she didn't answer, Cassian knocked again. "Nes, it's me." He had to wait again, but this time he heard the muffled footsteps getting closer. Then, the door opened, and Cassian's grin returned to his face. "Hey." He leaned on the door, knowing from experience that women found the way his muscles flexed to be sexy.

Nesta's half-closed eyes didn't really react, though. "What do you want?" She asked bluntly.

"Were you sleeping?" The question was a courtesy. He could smell in the thick air of the room what she had been up to, despite the open window by the bed. The red eyes were proof as well.

"Yes." She lied. "Did you get lost?" Her sexy lack of patience was amusing and just what he had wanted to be greeted by.

There was soft music playing from her phone on the bed. "I'm almost where I want to be, actually." Cassian said, his eyes wandering through the room behind his girl.

The eye contact that followed was intense. Cassian wouldn't break it, he could stare at her annoyed frown for ages and never get tired. And Nesta wouldn't either, as she simply couldn't stand to lose. She had her hair up in a ponytail that had been perfectly neat maybe an hour ago and now struggled to contain a few pieces of hair that were too short in the front and framed her face. Although Cassian was sure there were a pair of shorts on her legs, they weren't visible under the big t-shirt she used as pajamas. The band logo was unrecognizable after so many trips to the washing machine over the years.

Knowing very few people were allowed to see the perfect Nesta Archeron looking this disheveled, but he was, only filled his chest with excitement. Because not only was he allowed to see it, he was also allowed to take her out of those clothes and make an even bigger mess of her.

"Are you going to stand there forever?"

"Until you invite me in." He retorted.

She rolled her eyes, but stepped to the side and opened the door enough for him to enter. He walked to the middle of the room and heard the door close behind him. "I don't think I've ever seen your bedroom." She didn't answer, nor did she address his presence when she walked back to her bed and jumped in. Cassian just stood there, taking in the empty white walls, the blue stripes of her sheets, and the fluffy rug in the middle of the room.

"I hate shoes inside the house." Cassian needn't be told twice. His socks were stark white, and Nesta took notice. Hers were as well. "Matching," she mumbled distractedly.

The only light came from a round lamp by her bed. It was warm and threw yellowy shades across the walls, the bed and her face. She looked relaxed, and Cassian wondered if he had ever seen her like this. So calm and comfortable. He absolutely hadn't. He would remember. Like he remembered the first and only time he had made her laugh out loud —and actually chuckle. Cassian felt like he should have, though. Hadn't he made her feel good in his arms? He had. Six times, no less.

But Nesta hadn't looked this at ease. Almost the opposite, he realized. She had wanted to get out of his embrace as soon as they were done. She always ran from him.

Well, not anymore. Tonight, he would demand she give him more —at least a chance—, or else they would be done forever.

Please, prove them wrong, he begged her. Prove you do care about me.

From the bed, Nesta stretched her arm to open a drawer. "Do you want some?" An untouched joint was offered to him.

"I've been told I am insufferable when I am drunk and high." He joked. Nesta's lips curled up, remembering the moment she spoke those words.

"You really are." She scouted to the side, leaving room for him on the bed. "But you are not drunk, though."

Absolutely not. He needed his mind to be clear for this. Nesta's parted lips were distracting enough. Her smell. The skin of her thigh hot against the back of his hand when he sat down. Their eyes met, and Cassian cursed himself for accepting the silent offer and getting in her bed. This was not what he had come up here for.

Had she not leaned in, Cassian might had found in him the strength to get up again. But she did lean in, and his body followed suit. She kissed him. He kissed her back, and Nesta was quick to make it deeper, to make it hungry and needy. His hand cupping her face was meant to steady them, as surely were Nesta's on his hair. And his arm finding its place around her waist, or her legs now straddling him.

Yes, when his hand left her pretty face and met its double on Nesta's other hip, his goal was to make sure she was comfortably sitting on top of him. The grinding it caused was collateral damage. The seam of his jeans rubbed the right inch on her body, and soon Nesta was moaning in his mouth.

Hadn't she leaned in, Cassian would be standing on the fluffy carpet, pouring his heart out for her. But she did. And so he was now stripping her of her t-shirt and delighting himself in the realization that Nesta had not been wearing any kind of shorts under it. Just some lovely black panties he was quick to pull aside.

"Fuck!" She let out when his fingers pushed inside her. She was soaking wet just from making out.

There was no excuse for that.

"Tell me what you want." He demanded.

With her mouth open in a silent exclamation, Nesta rode his hand like she should be riding his cock. He curled his two fingers inside her, making her tremble. To keep her balance, Nesta's palms came to rest on his chest, supporting her weight. With her arms at her sides and her back arched, Nesta's tits were pushed right to his face. Not wanting to disrespect his host, Cassian's mouth was on them in an instant.

Hadn't she leaned in...

Nesta tried her best to contain her whimpers, and he did his best to steal new ones from her lips. "Tell me what you want." He repeated, now that Nesta was approaching her climax.

"I just want to come." She pleaded. Her gray eyes found his and gave him that look that almost had him coming in his pants. "Please, Cassian, make me come."

"And what do I get?" He teased, freeing her nipples from the pleasure and torture of his tongue on them. She shuddered, probably feeling the cold now that they were wet with his saliva.

Nesta didn't answer, so he had to be tougher on her. She was lost in her thoughts, bouncing on his hand and enjoying the feeling of his thumb on her clit. With his left hand, Cassian halted her movement just so he could slip his right from under her. Nesta whimpered again, but this time it was unsatisfaction what lingered on her pouting lips. An unexpected swat across her butcheeks made her jump slightly. It had taken her by surprise, although it shouldn't have. She knew what would come when she didn't answer him the first time. "What do I get, Nes?" Cassian was getting tired of repeating himself. She knew better. He spanked her again, just because he wanted to see her tits bounce in his face when she felt it and reacted.

Like a cat, Nesta stretched her body and rested it flat on top of his, gaining access to his neck and covering it in kisses. It was Cassian's turn to groan, more so when she nibbled his earlobe, and he practically melted when Nesta's plump lips sought his again. She was such a smooth kisser, so good at it, Cassian almost forgot she was the one supposed to be begging for his touch, not the other way around. He rolled over, pressing her against the bed now, and grabbed her tits with perhaps more force than needed. Not that Nesta ever complained about sex getting a bit rough. He kneaded them and pulled her nipples to his will, enjoying how hard they got against his palms and how she arched her back for more. When her tongue entered his mouth, Cassian knew she was desperate.

"Anything you want." She promised, thinking she knew exactly what he would take as compensation. "You can have me any way you want, but please," A pause to let out a moan right by his ear, "please, make me come."

Cassian was quick enough in taking down his jeans that Nesta didn't complain about his warm body leaving hers. He wasn't quick enough to put on the condom she handed him from the bedside table, though, so Nesta got on her knees in front of him, matching his pose, and started kissing him again whilst he opened the silver square and wrapped himself in the rubber. When he was done, Cassian wasn't able to tell who was hornier. He only knew one second his hands were in Nesta's ass, taking her in the air, so she could wrap her legs around him, and the next he had slammed their bodies against the mattress again and was fucking her for all he was worth.

It would have been great to say she came quickly and repaid the favor by sucking him, but after all that grinding, Cassian was as close to coming as she was. She squeezed him so tightly he stood no chance, and soon they were both panting, Cassian all the way in and Nesta holding on to him like her life depended on it, needing him even closer. When the climax ran through them, Cassian didn't pull out, nor did she urge him to. Instead, her fingertips started dancing through his back. Making circles at first, then more complicated shapes. Something like triangles, then curves, and more sharp angles right after.

Cassian thanked his past self for staying sober tonight, so he was conscious enough to understand the meaning of the lines she drew.

"Come on a date with me." He whispered against her ear.

"No." Her answer came immediately. Not harshly, at least not with the intention to be harsh. She said the wordas a matter of fact. Empty of feeling.

He closed his eyes. Why? Wasn't this what she wanted? For him to be blunt with his expectations? "You said anything I wanted." Cassian reminded her. He didn't move. Their bodies were still tangled over her bed: him inside her, her legs caging his waist, and her arms hugging his neck. How could Nesta reject him while holding him with such care? 

As if she had read his mind, Nesta let go of him completely, and he had no choice but to sit up. Somehow quicker than Cassian had been when he took them out, Nesta gave him his underwear and jeans back for him to put them on. "I meant something like a blowjob and to swallow." Her coarse words hurt his ego more than his feelings. He didn't answer.

Cassian got up and pulled up his pants, then seated himself again and stared at her, a question in his eyes. She could read it—she in fact did—, but didn't answer. Cassian wondered, had she not leaned in, would he have been brave enough to ask her out with the words he had carried from the football field? Would the result have been the same, or was the fact that they always fucked first, talked later what made them go in circles?

"It was a good game. You did good." Her suddenly bringing that up only made things more awkward. 

"Yeah." Cassian would rather leave now than sit through the silence that followed. He stayed, though, waiting for who knows what to happen and fix the atmosphere, to turn it into... what, exactly? She must have felt it too —the lack of appropriate words to end this night.

Cassian ran a hand through his hair. Nesta fixed it, her touch a ghost. He looked at her and demanded an explanation with just a stare. Nesta didn't give him that either.

"You should go down." She told him. There was no sharpness in her tone, and maybe that was her way of saying she was sorry.

Accepting his fate and just wanting to leave on a good note, Cassian raised a teasing eyebrow and eyed what was between her legs.

"Not that." There it was: the eye rolling, the cute annoyance. "I meant downstairs, to the party. They are probably looking for you."

Indeed.

"You are saying a lot of things you don't mean tonight, Nes. It's kind of confusing."

The accusation finally woke her up from the post-orgasm haze. She jumped out of bed, leaving her t-shirt behind, and going for the door. "You are confusing." Her voice told Cassian she meant it.

"I think I've made myself pretty clear, though. Haven't I?" He took his shoes in one hand and followed her.

"Haven't I?" She retorted, turning around to face him. The defiance in her eyes burned bright, giving her an intimidating glow that compensated her lack of a top. Cassian didn't even look at her tits.

She opened the door for him. He closed it before the gap was wide enough for him to go through.

"Would it kill you to give me a chance?" He finally spat. 

"A chance for what, Cassian? What exactly do you expect? To continue with the fucking, but once a week, grab dinner together?" 

"Well, yeah." Cassian still couldn't understand what was so awful about spending time with him outside their bedroom, a small bathroom or an empty classroom. Be seen out in the open, grab her hand and kiss it just because he feels like it. For Nesta to wear his jersey to his games and celebrate with him and his friends afterward. Grab dinner when their schedules allow, and then go home together.

Nesta held his stare, and this time he couldn't read it. Which could only mean she didn't want him to. Cassian sighed.

"Okay, so whatever I want?" He brought up Nesta's sex-induced promise again. "Just give me a reason I can understand." When she opened her mouth, Cassian's finger sealed it again. "If you want a guy to get you drinks at a party, why can't it be me? If you want to hang out with a guy on a Friday night and go watch a game together,  why won't you let it be me? And don't give me an I don't like you, because you clearly do. What is so awful about me that you don't want to even try?"

When she closed her eyes, unable to look into his, Cassian's heart sank, understanding that there was a reason after all.

"I've tried." She confessed. "I've seen what spending time with you is like, and I don't want it." Not only didn't Cassian interrupt her, but he urged her to keep going, curious to see where she was going. "I've been in a room with you and your friends and remember what was said to me for even looking in your direction a little too long." She started counting with her fingers. "I've spent the afternoon with you guys and been completely ignored by every single one, including you, although I was invited to be there. We've had lunch, I've been trapped at one of your dinner parties and on Feyre's birthday, and there is nothing you can possibly offer me in a relationship to make up for how awful I've been treated every single time and how you did nothing to stop it from happening. How stupid do you think I am to sign up for that again?"

Cassian was equal parts offended on his friend's behalf and his own. Had it been anyone else in front of him, he wouldn't have bitten his tongue at the insult to his friends. They had never spoken ill of her to her face or purposefully tried to exclude her. She simply didn't fit in with the group, and that was okay. They could spend time alone.

"If that is what I'm getting myself into..." She corrected herself, saying, "If that is what you can offer me, then I don't want it."

"Don't you think a relationship is a little more complicated than liking my friends or not?"

"I am in Pre-Med, Cassian, I don't have the time for complicated. I want easy. This..." She signaled between the two, "This is easy. And I like it a lot."

It was his time to be cold. "Sorry, but this won't do it for me." Cassian took a step back, putting much-needed physical space between them. "Obviously, I can't be with someone who thinks that about my friends."

She agreed and stepped to the side, making room to open the door for him. "And I can't be with someone who would let their friends say exactly the same things about me." It was the brief silence as the words sank in what pushed her to keep going. "To be honest, and I am not saying this to be hurtful, you don't deserve more."

Cassian only nodded, not necessarily in agreement, not fully differing either. He understood.

"Have a good life, Nes." He just walked away.

#nessian #nessian smut #nessian fic #nessian fanfic #nessian fanfiction #nesta #nesta archeron #cassian #cassian acotar #cassian x nesta #nesta x cassian

[aspecpplarebeautiful]

As an aroace I always wondered how it feels to be "in love" and how I realize if I am in love. I never had been or just didn't realized it but it happened that people started to tell me I would be and when I tried dating I realized pretty fast this wasn't the case and I was just feeling uncomfortable.

Since then I've been asking myself how do I know? Everytime I try to google how it feels like I just find how it feels for people who aren't on the a-spec. This is starting to drive me crazy. Especially because I'm almost 30 and everyone starts to tell me how I have to hurry and find a partner otherwise my life will be miserable because I don't have a partner and children. But what if I don't want that?

Right now I'm only putting so much preassure on myself because I'm scared of being alone later on even if I know I don't need or want such a relationship. For me it would be more than enough to live in a platonic houshold like a shared flat. All that is important for me is to have people around with whom I can talk to and spend some time with but also hide in my room alone if needed.

Yeah I don't want to live completely alone but I also don't want such a relationship and most of all I don't want kids. Just give me friends I can move in with and I'm happy.

Thinking about living with someone and have to spend 24/7 with them makes me feel so uncomfortable. I need my own space, my own room where I can go to for some me-time. I don't want to share EVERYTHING with another person and have no place to be able to retreat every now and then. It already makes me so uncomfortable when I see my parents and thinking about that this apparently is supposed to be my future. They have not a single room to themself, they have to share their bedroom, the living room, just everything and always have to make compromises how they want to set up the rooms and do stuff.

Don't get me wrong. I'm fine with doing that but again give me at least one room that's only mine and where I can do whatever and how ever I want to do things without taking another person into account and asking if this is okay with them. And I also want to make my own plans without having to ask another person first if it's okay all the time.

Sorry for the long text I just needed to rant because this bothers me for years now and it just don't seem to get better but worse and I'm sure I'm not the only one who has this problem.

In love can mean different things to different people, and it can feel differently too. I would say anyone or anything you care deeply about you can consider yourself to be in love, but this is also a term you can define for yourself. Being in love is also not something you have to experience or you have to want, some people never feel like they're in love, and that's OK too. I always feel like that ability to choose and define things for ourselves is a big part of the a-spec experience. And it can make things more difficult, but it can also be more fulfilling in the long run.

Not finding a partner by a certain age doesn't mean you're destined to be lonely or miserable. And some of the things you mention like wanting your own room/space or liking the idea of living with friends are definitely things I've heard other aros say they like too. This isn't an impossible situation, though it does involve finding your people, but people who want similar things do exist.

It sounds like you've been under a lot of pressure to fit a certain mold, or live your life a certain way. That can definitely be difficult, but know you're not alone. And that you're allowed to live your life in whatever way you feel works for you.

All the best, Anon! Take care!

#vent post

[thebottomfromhell]

Headcanons

Uppermoons + Muzan + kids and tropes during Christmas day and eve (NO READER)

Me ruining everyone's Christmas HC's of these guys, Marry Christmas!

Warnings: Cannibalism, Religion & Blasphemy

Muzan:

Pretends to enjoy Christmas in public, puting a good face and following the traditions when in reality he just wants to kill everyone the second they start singing.

Hosting a big and luxurios party, there is a dress code and children will be left in a separated room. He invites his neighbours, pretendind to be human.

Fake smiles all night.

Wants to burn up the nation that invented Christmas.

Gives the best gifts, not because he wants to or because he cares, but because he wants to look good.

Is the one who gives speeches, he planned it and practiced in front of a mirror with Nakime's help.

Kokushibou:

Hates Christmas, loathes it.

Will shut himself out after Halloween and not come out until mid January.

Unless, of course, Muzan forces him to pretend to be human and assist on his big celebrations.

Stays on the drinking corner with the drunk uncles, just staring without saying anything untill he is told he can leave.

If someone tries to talk to him he will pretend to be a statue.

Doesn't give gifts nor does anything special.

Douma:

He likes the vibe (the presents and the fact that people become like him for a night, mostly).

It fascinates him like everyone will put a happy mask and pretend they all love each other for the day, it comes close home.

Will remind everyone it's a religious festivity... constantly, almost making it a chore to some.

Reminds everyone that Jesus was born to die, ruining the mood of most.

Can't be uninvited because he usually hosts the party.

Depending on what he thinks about you he can iether give you the worst gift or the best gift ever.

Human buffet for Christmas eve, everything he can eat (also setting one for humans before his).

Will tell everyone, specially the children, that he ate Santa the next day.

Impossible to get rid of, he will go even if he is not invited, Muzan has tried.

Akaza:

He doesn't like it unless there is someone special who does, then he makes the effort, genuinely enjoying to some point.

He never hosts but arrive early to help with the food and decorations.

Thinks a lot about the gifts even if he never gives anything expensive.

Will argue for the children to have their own room and celebration since he doesn't want to deal with them.

Helps to clean after the dinner even if he didn't eat, stays like a cook all the party since he gets tired of other people fast, so it becomes his safe space.

Leaves a few minutes after the party is over and sleeps all Christmas day. No different if Muzan hosts it.

Nakime:

Sometimes Muzan let's her host in her castle, pretending it's a normal house, closing certain areas in "repair".

She doesn't like the celebration, but she likes hosting, to show off her giant and luxurious house with the best decorations and lights.

Dresses up for the event.

She talks to 5 people and leaves to her room for the next of the night.

No children in her castle, at all. Is you want to bring the kid, she is more willing to lose guests than to have the brats running around and dying because they couldn't follow instructions or respect her/Muzan.

She makes smalls gift to give to the guests in a sense of good faith.

Eats a lot on Christmas day as a present for herself. Sometimes Muzan let's her keep a guest for that as a gift.

Hantengu:

He would have enjoyed when he was human, now it makes him nervious.

He doesn't like the lighst and the sounds, also the preassure of having to decorate the house and make sonething with family... not for him.

Half of his clones like it, though, so he just hides away as the others try to celebrate or destroy the Holiday for everyone else.

Will steal part of the Clone's dinner and steal gifts for them, also get's sad if he doesn't get one.

Saves gifts for Zohakuten.

Doesn't attend Muzan's event, let's the clones do it for him. Muzan very much is happier without him around.

Sekido:

Christmas is infuriating!

Too much work! Why there must be a party to celebrate some Jesus birthday that already died two centuries ago? He won't even know if anyone skips it.

"Why are you wasting our time like this?! We should be doing something useful!" Only complains and doesn't do shit.

Secretly enjoys the gifts and makes sure to give something to the others, specially to Hantengu, and save something for Zohakuten.

Stays around only to show his dislike, complaining and judging others. Only keeps his mouth shut if Muzan is hosting.

Will scape Muzan's parties when the other clones are gone with the excuse of "looking for them".

Karaku:

Takes pleasure from Christmas!

He makes sure to get a house (stealing and killing the residents), put the decorations, sets some food (the corpses of the residents with some improvisation to make it look nice), and gets a lot of gifts for everyone, inclusing saving something for the kid. (Aizetsu helps a bit).

Learns all the jingle bells, traditions and makes up some activities for the night if needed. Also, fixing himself it's a must, showing and dressing up for the night.

Genuinely thinks it's more fun to make his own than hoing to Muzan's, so he sets an scape after the introverts are gone, knowing that if Muzan doesn't mind Nakime, Kokushibou and Gyutaro off, then he won't mind them too.

Sometimes goes to tease the children before leaving.

He makes sure to serve some entretainment first in this one before going to his own with the others.

Urogi:

Takes joy from Christmas!

Karaku makes the best celebrations, he likes them better than Muzan's, since they are cozy and warm.

But he likes assisting to both, since Muzan always ges some food for his moons in the "restricted rooms".

Also, he likes recieving gifts and the lights, even if sometimes he needs breaks because of the noise.

The energy is so cheerful and positive, he adores it, and every decorations is very cute for him.

Recieving gifts it's fine, Aizetsu helps him to remember to get some and save one for Zohakuten.

Sometimes goes with the kids to play with them, he adores them.

Will talk with everyone in Muzan's party until Karaku tells him that there is more food at home.

Aizetsu:

Christmas is sad...

Celebrating the birthday of a man that was born to be sacrificed and then use that said sacrifice to guilt trip the believers into the idea that their own birth is somethin that needs repentance, then then taking advantage of said celebration to force the working class into spending money and shame them when, compared to the parties made by upper classes, they have nothing showing off the difference of the preference life has in- "We got it, Aizetsu. You are sad. Please stop ruining for us!"

Helps Karaku to decorate since he feels pity that he does all that alone, even if he likes it. Sometimes he even wears the hat.

Reminds everyone to get gifts since he doesn't want anyone to be left out, including Zohakuten.

Doesn't like Muzan's party, they are fake and sad, so he just stands in a corner until Karaku gets him to go wherever they are staying that year.

Zohakuten:

Mostly curious about it, he doesn't unterstand the foreigh celebration but is willing to give it a try.

He hates Muzan's parties, those are boring, mostly boring for adults just wanting to show off wealth and looks.

He also doesn't like being with other children, he doesn't know why but he doesn't like them.

The lighst are exagerated and he can't find sense to it, he doesn't care about that Christ everyone is celebrating today, he isn't even here.

He does likes the presents and the extra food. Everyone saved something for him! Toys, drums and clothes just for him!

He only stays to judge people, then leave to see his gifts.

Gyokko:

It's a bit annoyed by the celebration, but every chance to show off is good.

He will only celebrate if there is a big party, prioritizing Muzan's invitations over anything else.

A human disguise doesn't make him justice, but he takes advantage of show his pottery and sell some pieces.

He will dress up and talk to everyone with class, taste and/or wealth. Sometimes he finds a good canvas to take home.

Hates kids on those parties, a miracle that he doesn't kill them on sight.

Doesn't have a pattern in turn of leaving, just goes home the second he got what he wanted or got bored.

Will eat something nice, a young woman with healthy diet and soft skin and tender meat, bloodied heart to celebrate at home.

Gyutaro:

Too tired for Christmas.

Just follows Daki's lead, she is the one who likes it.

ALWAYS at least 5 different gifts for his little sister. Clothes, make-up, jewelry, home decorations, and other things she might enjoy.

Evades parties, unless Muzan explicitely tells him that he must be there. Always brings Daki, most of the time staying inside her unless Muzan tells him otherwise.

Doesn't like this luxurious parties, would rather be anywhere else. Stays in silence a few feet away from Daki or anyone he might know until he is told he can leave.

Sometimes will go to tease the children, scaring then telling them they will get no gifts.

If Daki doesn't want to leave he goes back inside her.

Daki sometimes also gets him things, he takes great care of her.

Daki:

Loves Christmas.

The colours and lights are nice, the decorations are cute and Gyutaro always gets her a lot of gifts. Some frequent clients also give her presents.

She dresses up if Muzan invites her and Gyutaro to some party, she adores to go there and show off. Sometimes she will even sing for the guests.

Honestly? Sometimes she gets bored of dealing with the adults, everyone wanting to talk about business even in a party, but she won't admit it and still pretend to be an adult.

She thinks children (not admiting she is one) should be banned from this kind of parties.

She is almost everytime of the last people to leave, unless Gyutaro gets to the point of begging to go home or she has a surprise for him.

The next day she always spends it with her brother and the gifts.

Kaigaku:

He likes the sales (he can't help but lament he can't taste the food in this state), but everything else sucks.

Talking with others? Pass. The decorations? Pass. The need to pretend to like others for the night? Pass. Pretending that there is a magical old man giving gifts? Pass.

He attends Muzan's party under the order of Kokushibou and can't understand what are they doing there since they stay together in silence with the drunktards.

Some old women get close to him to talk about his looks and about their single grandaughters. They are the ones who give him a left-over piece of clothing as a gift, besides the pieces that Nakime and Muzan give to the guest.

He scapes the second Kokushibou actually feels sympathy towards him and tells him he can leave, even if sometimes the old man holds him up out of envy that Muzan doesn't specifically want Kaigaku there, so he can actually leave anytime.

Sometimes he tries to talk to Daki and Gyutaro, also Zohakuten if he is there. Urogi and Karaku naturally get close, the green eyed demons sometimes also get him something with Aizetsu out of pity.

He takes deep care of every gift he recieves, spends all Christmas day comparing the eve with his days as an orphan and human holding his new things.

#demon slayer #kny #upper moons #karaku #urogi #gyutaro #aizetsu #sekido #hantengu #daki #gyokko #zohakuten #kaigaku #nakime #akaza #douma #kokushibou #christmas

[asteriastarr]

hello again booteeful

i was wondering if you could do a part 2 to this part 2? well technically its a part 3

ok im confusing myself now XD DX

could you do another part to the Shapeshifter!Reader finally serving her detentions because deuce asked her to.

im in love with this and i feel like i might annoy you into making it a mini series???

AS ALWAYS NO RUSH/PREASSURE

LUV YA

THANK YOU FOR THE REQUEST! This probably isnt the best and is kinda short but i tried. Some of the chars may be a bit out of character but oh well anyways- hope you enjoy! (Also if you want a mini series of this i will absolutely make one)

POV: Shapeshifter!reader complaining about her detentions

Part 3ish to this

Y/n sat in her dorm room, her head on her desk, groaning as her friend group entered the room, she was in.

“What’s up with her?” Draculaura asked Deuce who was sitting calmly on her bed.

“She got another detention for attacking Heath and swearing at Mr Komos.” Deuce explained.

“Mr Komos hates me!” Y/n groaned hitting her head against the desk as Deuce quickly moved his hand on the desk to stop her from doing so.

“Well, he wouldn’t if you’d stop getting in trouble.” Clawdeen reasoned.

“That is impossible.” Y/n hissed, her head now resting in Deuce's hand.

“It’s… really not.” Clawdeen stated.

“It is for me!” Y/n exclaimed, finally standing up to sit next to Deuce and bury her face in his shoulder.

“Y/n- Just stop breaking the rules and you know- mocking teachers.” Clawdeen instructed.

Y/n lifted her head off Deuce's shoulder to give the werewolf a deadpan look.

“See- see that is where you lose me.” She stated, “I mean- What’s the point of being able to shapeshift if I never use it to mock my teachers?”

“In her defence, we do encourage her.” Frankie pointed out.

“Well-”

“Clawdeen, don’t you dare act like you guys have never asked me to make fun of a teacher… or pretend to be a parent so you can get out of classes for a few days which- we go to a boarding school I don’t know how any of you thought that would work… Heath… or how it somehow manages to keep working even though we’ve done it like fifty times.”

“I mean- I guess that’s true.” Clawdeen gave in “But Y/n you can’t keep getting detentions.”

“I know but- where’s the fun in that?” Y/n said before pausing “And I’m about to get another one.” “How do you know that?” Deuce asked, glancing down at her.

“Mr Komos is coming.” She answered before adding “I’m technically skipping a detention.”

“Y/n!” Clawdeen scolded.

“How do you even know he’s coming?” Draculaura asked.

“I memorised his footsteps.” The shapeshifter responds, standing up to sit by her window.

“Y/n! Are you in here? You’re supposed to be in detention!” Mr Komos yelled, knocking on her door.

Y/n stayed silent.

“Did she run off again?” “No, I’ve decided to be mature and wait for you to call campus security on me this time.” She responded.

“What do you mean-” Mr Komos questioned, opening the door and seeing her by the window “Don’t you dare.”

“Bye guys, bye Deuce love you!” She exclaimed, waving and opening her window, jumping out of it.

Mr Komos rushed over to the window, peering downwards, Deuce doing the same, only to find her gone.

“How does she keep doing that?” Mr Komos groaned.

“She’s amazing.” Deuce smiled continuing to look out the window.

#deuce gorgon #deuce gorgon g3 #deuce gorgon x reader #live action deuce gorgon #live action deuce gorgon x reader #g3 monster high #gorgon #live action monster high #monster high g3 #requested

[leonisdumbasallhell]

🪡 + Chris for his special day?

🪡 That’s gonna need stitches - :)

--------------------------------------------

"Getting hit with a door is new."

Chris glared at Leon from where Chris was laying on the ground, one eye starting to swell and bruise, his hand pressed against a wad of cloth trying to staunch the blood flow from the gash the door nob had left in his face when the tyrant had thrown it at him.

"I mean, through doors, sure." Leon continued, seeming far too amused by this, "But I've never seen one rip a door off it's hinges and throw it at you."

"We're looking at the next generation of Tyrant technology, I guess." Chris sighed, stretching his hand out to Leon for more gauze. He could feel the blood seeping through the fabric of his gloves. Head wounds bleed a lot, didn't make it any less of a bother.

Till Leon shook his head, hands up empty, "Damn, it's bleeding that much? I don't have any more."

Chris groaned. Thank god he didn't have any other injuries. He didn't even feel all that concussed, just mildly light headed. Which was going to get worse rather quickly.

"You called for evac?"

"Yep. You already asked me to."

Chris nodded against the gauze. He hated not being able to do anything. Maybe there was something else in the med kit that could help staunch the flow. He sat up, which he probably should have been doing to start with, reaching his non bloodsoaked hand towards the first aid kit at Leon's feet.

"Hey, woah, what do you think you're doing?" Leon picked up the first aid kit, removing it from Chris' reach.

"I don't know, something." He felt useless just sitting there, injured.

Leon rolled his eyes, looking through the box, "Alright, well, you're not doing anything. I'll look and see."

Leon slowly sifted through the box, looking for something to use while Chris continued laying there, stewing. If he'd been more careful, if he'd been paying attention, it wouldn't have hit him. With a door of all things. Christ on a stick, that's embarrassing.

He tapped his other hand against the rubble, impatient as he glanced at Leon, "Anything?"

Leon frowned, shaking his head. "Not really."

He looked at Chris then, gaze landing on his restless fingers, before he set the box down and wrapped his own around Chris' hand. He got that tone of voice Chris loved and hated, especially when he used it for something stupid.

"Hey, you're fine. Nothing's wrong. You'll be okay."

Chris didn't respond, still feeling frustrated by his own incompetence.

Leon didn't take it personally though, taking one hand and gently moving Chris' hand away from the wound, pressing his fingers against it and letting Chris rest.

He tilted his head, eyebrow raised "This okay?"

Chris simply nodded, crossing his arms over his chest, trying to feel anything but anxious. Now that he wasn't putting preassure on it himself, and with nothing else to do with his hands, he could feel now how much it stung, a gouge more than a slice. He couldn't imagine what it must look like. Probably with dirt or something in it. He could get an infection.

He tried to move again, "We should clean it--"

Leon grunted as Chris tried to move, gently pushing him back down, "No, I don't think we do. Not right now at least."

"Well, we could--"

Leon pressed a kiss against his forehead, interupting that train of thought. Leon pulled back, laughing, before he cleared his throat. "Okay, how about this. I'll take a quick look, and if it's really nasty, I'll try to clean it?"

Chris paused.

"Fine."

"Cool." Leon gently pulled away the gauze, some clotted blood tugging at Chris' skin as it pulled away. The wound stung more once exposed to the open air, making his skin prickle. Chris watched Leon's expression for any indication, but got nothing but a mildly perterbed 'hm.'

"What? Is it that bad?"

Leon shook his head, pressing the gauze back where it had been. "No, not really. It'll probably need stitches though."

#resident evil #leon kennedy #leon s kennedy #chris redfield #chreon #beat the shit out of chris friday #whump #🔪 fics

[yashirawr]

teru minamoto with the best friends to lovers trope

tbhk teru minamoto x gn!reader.

type: angst to fluff, headcannons, childhood best friends to lovers.

warnings: denial of feelings, teru feeling bad (i think maybe even a little ooc, i'll work on that too)

a/n: help, english isn't my first language so there's an awful grammar (also, lowercase intended) but i hope you'll be able to understand what i write <3 JAJDKAKD THIS WAS A MESS BUT I PROMISE I WILL DO BETTER NEXT TIME

ㅤ ⸝ㅤ ♡ as friends

teru was in constant denial.

he simply couldn't accept the fact that he liked, no, loved his best friend.

he had a lot of things to take care of: his family, his job, his studies and his reputation at all times.

but even so he couldn't help but think about how much he wanted to be near you when you weren't around.

he couldn't help but have this warm feeling in his chest whenever you two had any interaction. which was frequently.

you made him feel comfortable, but also awoke a million butterflies in his stomach.

he refused to accept it.

every moment spent together made him wish it last forever. he also wished to have more time to spend with you.

those silent wishes and all the overthinking at midnight was something he never experienced before, and he was quite mad about it.

why did you have to be so lovely?

still, he was aware of the situation. playing it cool, staring at you in the most discreet way possible.

he tried to avoid everything about you and distance himself hoping to kill those feelings he unfortunately had for you.

but it only lasted one week because it hurt too much, so he chose to leave everything as it was and find another solution that didn't involve losing you.

you of course noticed the constant change in his behavior but didn't want to ask because you knew that teru didn't like to talk about his feelings.

most of the time he let everything go away distracting himself by talking to you but right now it would simply make things worse.

the ‘confesion’ happened in the middle of a casual conversation of yours.

“look, i'm aware of how much you dislike talking about how you feel but you're worrying me, teru” you said suddenly, breaking the short silence that reigned minutes ago in the students council room.

“what are you talking about?” he turned his head towards you with a lightly confused expression, even though he knew exactly what you were talking about.

“one day you act bitter towards me and the other everything is fine,” you sighed, not because you were mad at him for not talking to you but because you didn't like the idea of something stressing him out. he had a lot of things to bear with, you knew it “i don't know what's happening and don't want to preassure, but i wanted to remind you that if anything i'm here for you.”

teru wanted to tell you to shut up, to stop making him fall for you even harder. you were the only person who noticed those details, and he hated how he also loved that part of you.

“i'm not actually the smartest, you know...?” he finally spoke with a voice tone that you weren't able to recognize, but it was somehow weak. defeated. you would never associate those words with teru “i can't believe the things i've been thinking about this past months”

“what were you thinking about?” you asked softly, getting closer to him. he avoided your question.

“i'm sure you already noticed that i can't be what you expect from me, nor what my family and everyone else expects from me” he sighed, looking at you with a somewhat distressed expression. but one that seemed to explain, and even mask, how he already accepted what he just said.

you knew him better than anyone else.

“what are you even talking about? what do you think that i expect from you?” it sounded a bit exasperated, and you scolded yourself internally for making so many questions instead of getting to the point “i love you, the only thing i expect from you is to accept that” you concluded, leaving silence after your words.

“that you love me” looking directly at your beautiful eyes, he repeated in almost a whisper. maybe trying to figure out if you really meant it, maybe trying to understand why.

“i love you” you said once again, knowing really well how much you did.

ㅤ ⸝ㅤ ♡ as lovers

you two, just as when you were friends, still didn't have too much time to spend together.

but when you did, you enjoyed and cherished every second of it.

making out, kisses and cuddles in the students council room.

(kicking akane to have some time alone JADJQJD ILY MY BOY)

study dates.

lots of study dates.

well, he would study and explain some things to you while you just sit on his lap and hug him without even listening.

eventually you'll be able to convince him to cuddle the rest of the afternoon.

tbh he's definitely a big spoon. he likes to feel that he's protecting you even at those moments.

but if he had a bad day, he knows that you'll let him be the little spoon.

being in your arms automatically makes him feel better and relaxed.

if he already felt calm talking to you, imagine cuddling you :(<3

also, the whole thing about his fangirls...

i mean at first they didn't notice anything since in school you just talked as always before becoming a couple.

but after some time they started to find it curious how you two would disappear at the same time, and to notice how much teru glanced your way.

some said you two were just friends, and that there was no need to attack.

a part of them did give you dirty looks.

the bad thing was them asking you for tips to get to teru, something that they already did, but now it was even more annoying because ofc you two were in a relationship.

you treated rather kindly most of them because they didn't know, so how could you blame them?

eventually and a few months into the relationship the most probably thing is that teru would already start showing you physical affection in public.

maybe holding your hand and kissing it, throwing an arm around your shoulders, giving you small kisses on your forehead as a goodbye or just because he wanted to.

teru would always protect you.

he knows he's so lucky to have you and you know you are too :(<3

basically, you're his weakness JANDJAJD.

#jshk #jshk x reader #teru minamoto #teru minamoto x reader #tbhk x reader #jibaku shounen hanako kun #toilet bound hanako kun #friends to lovers #。bibi writes 🌷

[curioscurio]

I comprehend every single thing you said about feeling the mucus moving through your sinuses. It’s so weird after days of so much sinus pressure(I was just recently sick, too) hope you feel better 🎃 <have a pumbkin

EXACTLY it's like once the main blockage is gone and everything starts flowing you can FEEL which parts of your face the mucus is flowing into from preassure and stuff!! But I'm feeling WAAAY better than yesterday or even this morning even though I'm still fatigued and achey and stuff

Snots coming out less yellow everytime so that's a good sign!

#tmi #sickness

[plural-affirmations]

okay, you said we could do a follow up and I honestly want to.

First off, thanks for the advice. I looked at the page you linked and on that site I've found many terms to describe things I'd already been experiencing but ignored. I'm not going to share with you all of them but in short were primarily traumagenic but we have many more endogenic alters than I'd expected and we do have a list of our origins to keep track. It feels really freeing. So honestly, thank you so much! This has helped us a lot, and while I don't think we're done yet, you helped us start this journey. So thank you!

Overall for terms though, we'll probably stick with mixed origins/traumaendo. You don't have to post this or anything (not that I'd mind! just no preassure yk) but I did really appreciate the help. I had no idea where to begin initially, haha. That's all have a nice day!

No problem!!! So happy to hear you're doing ok!

🖤💜💙💚💛

#answered #multiplicity #plural #pluralgang #plural affirmations #actually multiple #actually plural #did #did osdd #love mail

[batboyblog]

hi, i'm the anon who told the story of finding out im jewish only recently when an aunt came to visit and told us of how her mother (my grandma's sister) and her siblings came from poland fleeing the nazis because they were jewish. thank you so much for your reply. i kind of cried. learning about this was an Experience for me. It seems my grandma and her siblings didn't exactly want to hide being jewish, but didn't tell anyone. they didn't assimilate into christianity and didn't raise their children as religious. we didn't celebrate any christian holidays, observe any customs, but also didn't practice any jewish ones (obviously). since learning about it, my aunts and mother talked to my grandmother and asked for her story. she fled when she was about 10 around 1940 in an unlabeled merchant ship with a few other family's, only they didn't come with their parents. they dropped all their practices and grandma only broke their pretense to observe shiva when their brother passed away, and now for her sister. my grandma is a very old woman and no one wanted to upset her further, i mean she's already lost both her siblings and her only family from before her marriage, so the whole thing's been dropped by now. our aunt says their older brother actually became a practicing Jew once he moved to the big city and had a few photos of them as kids in Poland that he gave to his oldest son that she can show us, but apart from that there's no connection. It's strange, I've never been antisemitic but it feels kind of prejudiced of me to have mixed feelings on this. It feels like we got all the bad parts of generational trauma and missing stories and none of the good parts like community and a feeling of belonging. Though that does also mean we were never the victims of hate, so for that we should be grateful. It hit my mom much harder though. She's named after my grandma's sister (which is apparently a Jewish custom, to name your children after past family members? all of us are named this way. i didnt know this). I feel reluctant identifying as Jewish, I don't even know if by Jewish law I would be classified as such. Anyways.

i know this is a bit heavy, so don't feel preassured at all into replying. I just wanted to say this whole thing took place since early december of last year and your reply has kind of caught me vulnerable. thank you for your kind words. sincerely

first off thanks for writing back, it was very interesting and people so rarely ever follow up with anything these days.

One I'd like to say I'm touched by how your grandmother and her siblings stayed close over the years and you are connected to their families still. I can imagine 3 little kids from Poland in a ship with only each other, the horrible heart breaking choice their parents had to make to save them. So so many Jewish parents couldn't bare to part with their children... your great-grandparents made the hardest choice imaginable, your grandma was an incredibly brave little girl and it worked, it worked

I certainly understand feeling conflicted about it all, I can only imagine getting news that realigns your view of the world, yourself, your family, world history, and who you are. You wouldn't be human if that didn't leave you with a lot of mixed feelings and I can't tell you what to do with it.

Yes it is Jewish tradition to name children after dead loved ones, my nephew is named for my grandfather who passed a week after he was born. I'm not a Rabbi, or an expert in Jewish law, but by my understanding your mother is almost certainly Jewish since your grandmother is and you likely are as well. I've been assuming you live in America but that might not be the case, here Reform Judaism is the largest movement and tends to be pretty open about "who is a Jew" else where the Orthodox movement is most often the majority and they tend to be more strict but again I strongly think you both would be Jews.

Any ways I keep thinking of one of my favorite monologues, from Angels in America

"You can never make that crossing that she made, for such Great Voyages in this world do not anymore exist. But every day of your lives the miles that voyage between that place and this one you cross. Every day. You understand me? In you that journey is."

whatever you do with this, it is with you, every day that crossing in a boat is a little girl from Poland, that journey that she made is in your soul.

I can't tell you what to do with that, and I think it goes against the grain of my religion to tell you what to do with that. I will say there are times when the candles are lit and I look into them and I say the words I can see eternity, being chosen is not easy the path is hard, and I'm ALWAYS learning more and I will till the day I die, but I wouldn't trade it.

I guess what I'm trying to say in a super disorganized and emotional way is, a door has opened in your life, whatever you do you'll never see your grandmother the same way again, and you'll carry that story with you always. The question is do you want to know more? I think it's clear I hope you do and one day your kitchen might fill with the smells of baking challah the way your great-grandparents in Poland might have done before the war. But I can't make that choice for you and I feel bad even saying what I think.

What I said before stands you and are a miracle, and whats more a testament to love undying, so many children sent away by parents who loved them enough to save them, little pieces of ash in the wind blowing away from fires of Armageddon, really little seeds blowing out of a forest fire to grow a tree in a new world and look at all its branches. I hope whatever happened to your great-grandparents the idea of their children having a future was a comfort in the darkest moments. May their memory be a blessing.

#Jewish #Jumblr #Holocaust #asked #answered

[skzdarlings]

Hey Darling ♡

After long consideration I decided to finally write you this message. It will probably be really long and you don't have to answer it! I just want to let you know a few things:

I came across your account a few months ago when you released the first chapters of the 'sharing a bed' series. I was immediately impressed! You are so talented and it may sound stupid but I can 'feel' how much thoughts and love you put in your works.

TW: depression and suicidal thoughts

I also found your account when I was at a very difficult time in my life. After four years of therapy (depression) I tried to get my life back. I've managed to get a part time job but I quickly realized that it exhausts me too much and makes my symptoms worse. But I didn't want to admit that it's only worsening my depression so I didn't stop. And I remember a time when I was at work on the toilet having a panic attack and thinking about ending things. It sounds super cliché but at that moment I got a notification that you postet a new bodyguard Felix chapter. And suddenly my thoughts went like 'I will never know how your bodyguard story ends if I give up now'. Don't get me wrong, I have other 'things' that give me strengh to continue (family) but on that day, it was you and your amazing story that pushed my dark thoughts away. And I really want to thank you for this ♡

I also remember the night you released that one chapter where the main lead had to say goodbye to Jisung because she wanted him to be safe... I cried. You can't imagine how thankful I was to finally cry again. I couldn't cry in a long time no matter what I tried. After your story basically forced me to cry I could let everything out. And even though my head was exploding afterwards, it felt so good. Thanks to you I also realized that I can still feel emotions because at that time I felt like all my emotions were just gone. When I think about this time I also realize that this chapter made me more excited and happy than the SKZ comeback. So again, thank you so much.

A lot of stuff happened, my whole situation got worse and at some point I decided to go back to a familiar psychiatric ward to get some help. I'm in there since August now and last week they started to treat my depression with ketamine. It's super exhausting but maybe it will get better!

I didn't want to write this message for you to feel sorry for me or feel preassured to write more. I wanted to tell you that your stories have a positive impact on others! Before depression hit me like a train I wrote my own fanfictions. I never posted them but I loved writing them. You are such an inspiration to finally start writing again. It's still exhausting as I'm not able to concentrate for too long but it gives me so much joy. Your stories and the effort and love you put in them gives me so much motivation and I can't say this enough but I'm so thankful for everything you and your stories gave me over the past few months! Thank you so so much ♡

P.S I can't wait to read the last chapter from the bodyguard fic! I'm such a big fan and even though I'm really sad that it's the last one I can't wait to read what you've planned for the end. But no preassure! Take all the time you need ♡

I assume this is okay to post because it's anonymous, that way I can reply haha but let me know if you want me to private this at any time! <3

But oh my goodness, such a thoughtful message took so much heart to write and I cannot tell you how much I appreciate you taking the time and effort to do so. I don't even think I can formulate a good response that it deserves! But please know how much you have touched me in return. I have personally lived with similar things, though I find it hard to talk about so I really do respect and appreciate you doing so here.

I also understand what you mean about something like a story update being one of the things to hold onto for a while. i think the small things can make a difference and there's nothing wrong with that. It's nice to think there are other small things waiting around the corner that you might not even know exist yet, but they will also add to good moments too.

I wish you so so much love, really and truly. I hope you find some help and relief with these new treatments. Thank you for reading and again thank you for messaging. All the best!!

<333

#replies

[haunted-doodles]

"Well, Bad Luck."

[fr fr? Click for better quality.]

Was wondering what would happen if each of the Riptide pirates didn't end up getting what they wanted in life, or rather, finding eachother.

After Jay refusing to join his crew, Chip continued island hopping about. His ship wouldn't have exploded and thus Chip would have never visited Loffinlot, nor do I think alone he'd of been able to get up and go gambling. Eventually though upon travelling to Noctis, he fell victim to Grimm at the ball. Without anyone there who'd be able to save him, Chip was thoroughly charmed and became a vampire. Eventually he breaks out of the trance and books it out of a window, yet the damage has been done. The only real connection he'd been able to make was with Rebecca and thus he mourns her a fair lot more than he did in canon in this. He's still searching the seas for Arlin, to recreate the black rose in his own image. Grimm's corruption lays heavy in his mind though as he starts to plan with Lizzie on how they can win the war.

Jay continued on with her Navy training alongside Kira, the two becoming a recogniseable force. After the death sister, The weight and preassure from her family to help in the cause of ending the age of pirates is far stronger than before and her drive alongside it began to falter. Yet still she remains persistent in her studies, in her commanding of her crew. She begins to fall in love with Kira as they grow older together and they get engaged. Of course, the most preassure to end the war comes from her father, who is overbearingly watching over her shoulder almost every second. Life in the Navy for Jay is awful. Sometimes she wonders what it would've been like if she accepted that scruffy boy's hand all those years ago. Other times she wants to just get everything over with.

Gillion, instead of being shunned for his act of killing the Navy Officer, was actually praised highly as the perfect soldier he was. Because of this, he was driven further and further into his path as the chosen one and his mind is broken deeper and deeper into the depths of what the elders desired. He grows spiteful and hates anyone who does not bare undersea blood, even to the point of snapping and lashing out at others. He begins to learn about the oversea for when he must travel land to fufill his prophecy. Begins to prepare. Eventually, he is sent overseas as their perfect soldier, who always write home to the undersea on his findings. Who travels island to island, slaughtering the awful creatures that have caused his people so much pain.

He will be the one who swallows the land whole. It is his destiny.

#jrwi #jrwi fanart #jrwi riptide #just roll with it #just roll with it riptide #Jay ferin #Gillion Tidestrider #chip jrwi #Honestly? I debated a fair bit with Chip. Because having him stuck in the casino is just boring #but i know he would get wrapped up in that very easily. #he's got no real reason to visit desire island because he doesn't know who Nik is. Probably joined Lizzie in her fight for the war. #And the only logical conclusion that would hold something interesting narrativly i had was: Chip ends up getting turned at the noctis ball. #Jay and Gill end up changing a lot when you just remove chip from the equation #but realistcally? Chip has nothing but adventure to go on. he's a free bird. #but yeah no that's literally the sole reason chip's a vampire. I think it's fun; it's interesting and can #add a lot of personal conflict for him #especially with his daddy issues. #he doesn't WANT to leave Grim when he snaps out of it at first. He treats him so kindly. he's the father chip was never able to have #but. Arlin is still out there. He needs to find him. #Most likely Chip would die alone at sea in this au. Swallowed whole by the black sea when he tried to venture there alone. #as he's not going to be able to break into the block all by himself. #n yea #i guess i'll also mention the quote IS an TAZ wonderland reference. #for my mc e|roy enjoyers out there

[brammariek]

WIP whenever!

got tagged by @wanderingaldecaldo and Oh BOI do i have a lot going on hfjkdsjkf

the modding adventures you guys saw yesterday it's a dress that's been sitting in my DAZ studio library for a while now, which I'm working on along with some other ports. I got a lot of Dishonored 2 assets I wanna port over

more to come on those once i finish this dress!

don't really write much fanfics so don't have anything written up but i got plenty of drawings! under the cut cuz most are of the NSFW kind, even though not all of it is shown, cuz we all know tumblr is just gonna nuke it. they will be up on my twitter and bluesky once i settle on a new watermark for 2024.

I've been experimenting a lot with pre-rendering things in DAZ studio and then using that as a reference to streamline my art process a lot more, and cuz I have a bad habit of scrolling endlessly through references for the "perfect" ones.

IN THE MEANTIME i'm tagging @iamthekingofsass and @cuyima with no preassure ofc

#tag games

[bulletproofscales]

monster fucking march 5 - bulbs, spikes and bumps (namkook)

oh i took my sweet time with this one because it was SO out of my comfort zone!! but i ende dup really liking the dynamic i was able to wrtie. which is kinda what the challenge is about!! tho fr now ill preassur emyself to psot everyday for the rest of march to get to all 10 prompts!! wish me luck :,)

tags: intersex jungkook , jungkook has both genitals , mentions of female genitalia , monster genitals , monster pussy , trans man namjoon , ftm namjoon , post-phalloplasty namjoon , trans dick namjoon , first times , chubby namjoon

3.4k (no wonder it took me forever )

AO3 LINK

“Looking for someone into cock biting-” 

No.

“Is there any sadist dtf my ass that has this weird medical condition-” 

No! 

Jungkook’s hands abandon the keyboard as if it were on fire. 

He can’t do this. But he has to. 

Already in his mid twenties, Jungkook hasn’t gone past the occasional hand job back when he was just starting college. Back when he knew something was off but never had the urge to experiment and find out exactly what. 

Needless to say, it was a very painful first fingering experience, for all the wrong reasons. 

Yes, he’s heard people with vaginas say it can hurt the first time. But he didn’t expect his fingers to barely fit. Scrunching up his face as curling them forward and back only seems to make the squeezing worse. 

Jungkook knew he was intersex, his mother made a very conscious effort to explain it to him. He has both genitals and he’s gone his life mostly in normality. All of his biology was male except for the vulva behind his sack; so he lived his life normally. Intersex people exist and he doesn’t have to go around telling people, he doesn’t owe that to anyone! 

Though… He does panic when in a wild tipsy night by himself he wants to experiment fingering himself, copious amounts of lube as he reaches between his lips; thighs spread open and anticipation pumping his heart. 

And when he pulls out to see his fingers swollen and red. It was a bit of a moodkill. If not, the thing that sent Jungkook into cardiac arrest. 

Yes, he knows the rest of his biology is all relatively normal. That he could easily just have standard sex in any position without having to involve the anomaly on his body. But now, as if being intersex hadn’t been enough of a stigma for him to overcome, now he has to worry about people finding said pussy he shouldn't have in the first place, has weird hard bumps in it!

His mom was a fumbling mess when he interrogated her over the phone. Something about her making a mistake, falling for some succubus-like man thing, and some of his genes passing onto Jungkook! 

So Jungkook’s vagina has bumps, apparently. 

He hasn’t had much sex at all after that. 

Though redacting this message was becoming a harder task than he had anticipated. Not even anonymity and a strong vpn were enough to make the shame he felt wash away. Writing and deleting and re-writing just to delete again in exhaustion.

And he’s becoming desperate. And lonely. 

That's where he finds himself now. In a very deep corner of the internet. An old abandoned website with only a few people in it, describing different genitalia anomalies. As if he was gonna find anyone like him. Jungkook didn’t need to find anyone like him though. He just needed to find someone… willing. 

 He needs a drink. 

It ends up being 5 drinks until Jungkook’s drunken inspiration takes hold of him. Writing an obscene message and posting it shamelessly before he plops on the bed; knocked out by the weird cocktail of anxiety, and alcohol that tired him out.

At least he is relieved he didn’t actually post his number online for a group of strangers. But still inside this obscure forum thing, a little bell shows on his chats. Flinging already, he reaches to click it.

 With horror, Jungkook is reminded of his last night’s endeavor when a notification of a message from the same dark website shows up on his phone. 

“Hello Im JUngkoook, my vagina has liek bumps in it or sumthing! you dont have to be into it!!!!! as long asd youre down with having sex w me in anywway shape or form (i ahve a penis too ;))) !! im just despedrate ok? text me if your interesdted!! !!  :DDD”

icantfeelmydickwhenimwithyou: hi! i dont know if you were serious or not, but if youre from seoul, im a bit desperate and more than ok with… your situation. 

icantfeelmydickwhenimwithyou: we wouldnt have to like fuck on first encounter but if you wanna chat im interested :] 

Well she fell for a succubus. She can’t tell Jungkook shit.

He stares in awe. Jungkook’s parents have given him so many talks throughout all of his teenage internet friendships about the dangers of the internet and all the creeps that lay within. But Jungkook is actively seeking them out now. Not only that, but he wants to meet with one too. Have sex with them! 

Jungkook’s mom would not be proud. 

jkabtthecockbiting: i /am/ from seoul 

jkabtthecockbiting: honestly…if youre ok to fucking right away id skip the chitchat. 

His confidence dissipates when the stranger replies immediately. 

Jungkook wasn’t dumb enough to give him his address. Or too agree to go to “Namjoon’s” as he learnt is his supposed name. So they agreed to a love hotel on the outskirts of Seoul. Not the safest place around, but Jungkook can defend himself! He hits the gym! He boxes! That's what he tries to remind himself at least, as he finds himself outside the sketchy area on a random Thursday night.  

icantfeelmydickwhenimwithyou: cutting straight to the point huh

And maybe this stranger online posing no hesitation to meet him, should've been a red flag. His mother would be very disappointed. But Jungkook needs to feel wanted. And if a creep sadist perv on Reddit is the one to make him feel that way. Then they meet. 

He does regret not having asked for some sort of photo or social media. Jungkook may not be desperate enough to fuck a 70 year old man. But he doubts an old man would’ve figured out a way through underground fetish chat rooms, right? Right.

“Jungkook, right?” Oh.

It's cold, he has his arms crossed over himself trying to protect himself from the falling snow while keeping contact with everyone who passes by. 10:30pm outside, that's what they had agreed on. Of course Jungkook not only got there at 9:50, but had booked a room in the hotel for the night. And now has to think about how he will tell Namjoon that he expects him to pay half of it too… Is Jungkook even allowed to request that? This stranger is the one doing a favor for him. 

Even if he hears the steps approaching him, making his head snap up, Jungkook is startled anyways. The stranger must recognize that same jitteriness on himself. 

 Out of everything he’s imagined, this isn’t what he considered Namjoon would look like. Gentle but broad rounded shoulders, only a slimmer bit taller than Jungkook. Padded chin with some patchy stubble and pillowy body showing through the thick layer of clothing. Pear shaped body clinging to his shirt and jeans; despite the flannel and jacket, it still shows. He smiles a bit, plump lips catching Jungkook’s attention more than his body; dimples showing through. 

“I uh… I already booked a room.” He speaks from behind the broad expanse of soft shoulders. Namjoon turned to look over his shoulder, smiling surprised. 

“Y-yeah.” He can’t help but grin, feeling the release of tension of seeing this real life 20-30 something person with him; a real, friendly-looking, human. “Namjoon?” 

“That's me.” Namjoon offers his hand and Jungkook eagerly takes it, satisfied with the warmth emanating from this man. “Oh you’re freezing. Come on, let's go in.” He says it so casually as if they were getting into his home; it's a bit relaxing as he follows Namjoon without letting go of his big warm hand. Like the rest of him.

“Oh! You prepared for everything! Nice.” Even if his reaction is positive, Jungkook can’t help but feel that familiar anxiety slip through. Is he being too eager? Overprepared? He can only smile timidly and nod as Namjoon makes his way to the desk, asking for a reservation to his name for him; and Jungkook lets himself find refuge behind the mass of the other man. Feels nice. 

Namjoon’s smile at him is also very reassuring. “No, no you’re alright.” There's a chuckle attached to the end of his sentence and everything. “I’m not particularly into it. Or I mean, I never tried!” He adds quickly.

Namjoon maneuvers his way through the awkwardness easily. While Jungkook only speaks when they’re in the privacy of the hallway together. 

“So… You're into bumpy holes?” He doesn’t bother being subtle. Though he does feel a bit guilty in the way Namjoon chokes on his own spit; but not guilty enough to hide his giggling. “Sorry, too much?”

“I’m your first I get it.” Jungkook reassures smiling.  

“But uh… I had bottom surgery about a year ago. And it's safe to have sex, but I still need a bit… uh, more, to really feel anything. Until the nerves heal at least.”  Jungkook can only stare a bit wide eyed nodding. 

There's something so… relieving about hearing Namjoon isn’t ‘normal’ either. A smile slowly grows on his face. He’s never been with a trans person. But walking with Namjoon now, it just makes perfect sense that they found each other. 

“Hopefully I’ll be of help then.” His smile must be contagious because Namjoon is grinning back at him, gentler than last time. “Won’t it hurt the stitching?” Jungkook asks curiously.

“Oh no no. Most of the stitching is gone, and the scarring made the skin really tough.” He explains before his smile widens more, a little bit of confidence oozing off him. “You did your homework.” 

“You’re not the only one that looked for bottom surgeries!” Jungkook accuses with a finger that pokes at Namjoon’s pillowy bicep. Their giggling rudely echoing through the hallway. 

“This is our room.” Laughter still clings to his voice as he gestures to the room. “I’m kinda scared, never been in one of these.” He confesses. 

“I can still appreciate it!” He whines but the laughter makes it less serious. Jungkook is starting to worry less about their night together, and more about if the other customers will file a complaint about them. Which feels a lot better. The door opens and Jungkook prepares himself to be grossed out. 

“Does it look like I have?”

“That was the anxiety, Namjoon.” Jungkook deadpans earning another wave of giggles. 

They turn to each other in pleasant awe, smiling softly in the brief moment of silence. Jungkook catches Namjoon’s eyes glancing down towards his lips before their eyes meet again.

“Oh!” “This is so much better than I expected.”

“Me too.”

He wouldn’t be able to tell you who leaned first, all Jungkook knows is it is his own back pressing the door shut close; once the eager weight of Namjoon’s body presses flush against his. Softened belly and chest engulfing him in warmth as Jungkook cups his face, feeling big hands cup at his waist and squeeze. Coaxing a moan to vibrate for his lips to be swallowed by Namjoon. 

This is where he would start to feel nervous, jittery over not letting himself get to enjoy too much. Jungkook would have to stop them before it gets too far, before he has to explain himself; make excuses for his body. But he doesn’t have to, not when Namjoon’s hands softly caress the hem of Jungkook’s shirt. Stripping his jacket and shirt alike, leaving him bare. 

Goosebumps break down his back from the feeling of the cold wall against his skin; but Namjoon’s warm hands tug him closer and away from it. Jungkook’s muscular thigh slots between Namjoon’s thicker ones in an attempt to stabilize himself. A bit harshly but it seemed to do the trick for the other; moaning deeply into Jungkook’s lips. 

Jungkook doesn’t feel like covering up, he feels like revealing Namjoon too. 

His own hands strip his jacket off before letting his hands get a feel of his tubby torso, pudgy and soft to the touch. Jungkook’s hands are desperate trying to memorize the curve and thickness of his waist, and Namjoon’s chuckle into the kiss does nothing to help. Confidence making his dick twitch in desperation; which he is sure Namjoon can feel, from the way they’re pressed together. 

“F-fuck… Fuck can I?” He whispers as his hands trace to Jungkook’s belly, settled on the waistband of his pants; where Jungkook’s bulge is beginning to show. He nods urgently, his own hands aggressively tugging down at Namjoon’s sweatpants; everything on his body jiggling softly with the strength of Jungkook’s pulling. Too preoccupied licking his lips at the sight of Namjoon’s semi to worry about himself. 

“Pleasantly surprised.” The flirty giggle clings to his voice as his hand curiously caresses the chubby bottom of Namjoon’s belly, trailing down to wrap around his dick. Both of them looked down at Jungkook’s tattooed hand. 

“You’re hard.” Jungkook whispers with an awed smile and very shameless staring. 

“Surprised?” He retorts with humor and endearment. 

Harsh, he’d told Jungkook. So biting his lips, he squeezes Namjoon’s shaft, letting his nails sink a little into the skin in a way he’d never dare to try on himself. But Namjoon seems to melt into it, his thick thighs shivering in what Jungkook can only assume is a mix of pleasure and pain? He moans like its only pleasure. 

“We don’t have to do anything.” His thumbs rub soothing circles along his squeezed knees. And oh, how could Jungkook pass up an opportunity like this? When is he ever going to find someone like Namjoon again?

“I wanna see too…” His voice sounds significantly deeper than Jungkook remembers it. Making his heart skip a beat as he looks up to Namjoon; whose half lidded eyes do nothing to calm his stammering pulse. Warm hands squeezing gently at his waist; so much softer than Jungkook’s treatment. 

Guiding him towards the bed, their legs still tangling together as Jungkook lets himself fall on the surprisingly soft mattress; Namjoon standing in front of him. He instinctively presses his thighs together in an attempt to hide his vulva. But those same big hands are rubbing at his knees as Namjoon carefully kneels on the bed. The hunger in his eyes dissipated for something softer. 

Jungkook has to really bite into his lip to stop a shaky whine from slipping, so many years of self neglect leaving him needy and so sensitive. But even so, a choked whimper slips past. “Can I?” Namjoon asks, regardless of the desperation in Jungkook’s eyes when he snaps up to look at him again. 

“I want to.” Jungkook confesses vulnerably. “Just, uh… force of habit.” He chuckles a bit at himself, taking the first step as his thighs begin to spread for the dreamy man. The rush of adrenaline makes his breathing already a little heavy. Biting his lip preparing himself for the worst. 

But Namjoon’s expression only melts with lust, exhaling as he doesn’t take his eyes off Jungkook’s crotch. “Oh look at you…” He whispers and it feels like his voice could rattle at his insides. Warm hands still very much secured on his muscular thighs. Jungkook can feel his face burn as he forces himself to look up once Namjoon’s fingers abandon his leg to caress his lips, tentatively. Only the tips of fingers feeling him up. 

“You're so wet…” He mumbles against Jungkook’s lips. Only getting a desperate moan in response. His jaw dropping, looking up at Namjoon with eyes that struggle to stay open. “I can’t finger you but–but we’ll take it slow, yeah?” His thumb presses against his clit, and Jungkook’s eyes roll with a trembling whine. 

“Yes!” All self control leaves him, body trembling, begging for Namjoon to do something more than to caress the shaven lips of his pussy. “Yes Namjoon, please-” The sentence dies in his throat as Namjoon’s fingers press between his lips, rubbing up and down without pressing in just yet. Wet and sloppy noises coming from within him; only more accessible as his dick hardens against his flat tummy. 

Namjoon smiles at the shivering man beneath him, taking the liberty of leaning closer and really making Jungkook’s legs spread. Opening to fit the girth of Namjoon’s hips; calves squishing into the chub a bit. Plump lips take a hold of his, greedily kissing as Jungkook is engulfed by the softness of Namjoon’s torso. 

He has to make an effort to stay lucid enough to respond. Nodding quickly before he can even coordinate to speak, stuttering as his own hips grind against Namjoon’s fingers. Stabbing jabs of pleasure spreading through his navel. “Yes–Yes please!” Shaky hand presses to Namjoon’s cheek just to pull him in for another kiss, to let his weight press him down to the mattress. For the first time in a while, Jungkook allows himself to feel empty, to yearn for the warmth he so desperately craves. Worsening when Namjoon pulls his fingers away.

Something in his stomach tightens in anticipation, for it all to go invariably wrong. But Namjoon aligns himself, taking a curious look at where their crotches meet, sliding on a condom before he starts pressing in. Frowning in concentration, while Jungkook’s heart goes rigid. Gasping quietly at the stretch, he feels his bulbs press onto Namjoon’s dick in a tight fit. Jungkook can only imagine the pressuring squeeze they’re pushing onto Namjoon’s dick; even if he feels more stretched than he ever dared to try. 

Even as his heart raises to Jungkook’s throat he stares at Namjoon wide eyed. Taking in his groans, trying to read if it's the pain or the pleasure overpowering his senses. Though Namjoon’s continuous, even if slow, sliding into him is somewhat of a good sign. Regardless, he asks. 

“G–Good?” The insecurity shows in his voice even throughthe heavy breathing and fucked-out stutter. Namjoon opens his eyes for him with a haze of their own; his voice sounding a little breathless itself when he responds. 

“I won’t.” He whispers leaning to take Jungkook’s lips into another kiss, both of them smiling into eachothers mouths before his hips begin to grind. Their kiss is sloppy enough that it's not able to silence the moan of pleasure out of Namjoon’s throat. Unable to help himself as a rhythm begins to build. As Jungkook begins to lose himself, his insides churning in a pleasure that takes him from within. Feeling through the nubs inside him every inch of Namjoon’s skin, his own bumps, his own imperfections. Filling him to the brim with quickening thrusts. 

“Oh Jungkook… It feels amazing.” He whispers leaning so their noses brush, fully bottomed out he can feel the way Namjoon’s entire body shivers in pleasure. “Y-you?” His smile is giddy even if it's shaky; like he is holding back.

It feels ridiculous for him to even ask! Jungkook is nodding before the words come out again. “So, so good, keep going!” He can’t help but grin excited, nodding in encouragement; seemingly contagious as a wider smile spreads on Namjoon’s own face. 

He is beyond controlling the string of moans that Namjoon coaxed out of his chest with each thrust. Warmth, all he feels is warmth. From the inside out, form the jiggling soft body pressed on top of his, weighting on him like a blanket. Namjoon’s own moans, deep and lustful, making his eyes roll back as his legs hang heavy and useless at either side. Dick rubbed against the bottom of Namjoon’s belly, sinking into it deliciously. 

Jungkook never could’ve imagined, he could ever feel this good. That he could ever cause this much pleasure to someone else. 

It's pointless to try to warn Namjoon about his orgasm. Legs squeezing into the sides of his chubby belly as he spurts against the very bottom roll. “D–Don’t– Don’t stop!” Is all he manages to say. Hands cupping Namjoon’s thick neck howling in pleasure as he continues. Shamelessly enjoying after so many years of deprivation. 

He never wants it to end. 

“F-fuck –fuck don’t say that, Jungkook. I’m – I’m going to-” Namjoon’s own speech is cut off with a shivered moan, his entire body trembling and spasming as he grinds his hips into Jungkook’s bumped heat. 

And for a moment everything stills, looking at one another with widened eyes. Like it's the first time in a while either of them have been able to feel this amount of pleasure. 

The first, but definitely not the last. 

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