#q word is the middle ground. stop

[puckarchives]

the (infamous) hughes brothers sleepovers: l. hughes

blurb: in which you and luke introduce the daughter the world never even knew you had to the nhl.  / word count: 1.8k / pairing: luke hughes x fem!reader

When the tradition originally started, Luke was in his rookie year of playing with Jack for the Devils, and began entirely as an accident. Somehow, Quinn ended up passed asleep in the middle of your living room, flanked by Luke and Jack the weekend that the Canucks played the Devils, too worn out by their hours-long FIFA and Call of Duty battles, and high off of the inordinate amount of snacks the three had consumed.

This, however, quickly evolved into an actual planned sleepover; once a month, one of the boys would host the other two at their home, where they would all act akin to literal children— they would build a fire outside, and once they got inside, would build an actual fort— pillows, couch cushions, and blankets would litter the ground, and by the time you knew it, you would come down to find all three tangled together somehow, with Luke’s arm over Quinn’s face, Jack’s head hanging over the edge of his makeshift bed, and all of them in the same order: Jack on the left, Luke in the middle of his two older brothers, and Quinn on the right. 

In short, it was the cutest thing you had ever seen— you got to see the level of adoration and love that each brother had for the other two, and got to see the way they interacted outside of the rink, and outside of the cameras and fame. During the sleepovers, they were just that— three brothers who cared about each other, and who loved each other. 

This, however, brought you to your most recent predicament: here you were at 11PM on a Friday night, trying to herd the three Hughes brothers around a 24-hour Target, following behind them with a cart that was quickly growing in the amount of sugar it held. This month was Luke’s— and by extension, yours as well— turn to host, which meant that you had the opportunity to load them all of into your car, drive them to Target, and watch them go crazy trying to grab snacks. 

“Well, if you get those, then Jack won’t eat them. You know that, Q” Luke said to his older brother, who was holding a pack of Nutter Butter cookies, while Jack was in the aisle over, stacking his arms with the Smirnoff’s he would later try to ice his brothers with. 

“Good, more for me then,” Quinn replied, before dumping said pack into your cart. He laughed as Luke added two more packs of cookies— the chewy and regular Chips Ahoy, before sliding beside you, laying a pack on your forehead, and then following Quinn as he walked into the next aisle in search of their middle brother. 

When you followed them, however, literally only seconds later, you were met with an unexpected sight. As you steered your cart, you stopped midway, because there, in the middle of the drink section of a Target in the middle of nowhere New Jersey, stood all three Hughes brothers, with Nerf Guns pointed at each other, resembling that Spider-Man meme where they all stood in a triangle, pointing at one another. 

Before you could ask what the hell was going on, they fired— Jack ducking before Luke’s bullet could hit him, but hitting Quinn square in the chest as Luke ran to get behind you, using you as a human shield. After no more shots were fired however, they all stopped where they were, stood up, and continued to act as if nothing had happened. Jack loaded up the two pack of sodas and drinks, Quinn kept walking into the neighboring aisles, and Luke tapped away on his phone, all acting as if they hadn’t just had a full-on Nerf war right in front of you, and as if your boyfriend hadn’t been using you as a human shield from it. God, you were way too old for this, you thought, before sucking it up and laughing to yourself as you traversed the next aisles. 

By the time you were checking out of the Target, your bags were packed to the brim with overly-sugary snacks; ranging from the aforementioned cookies, (which Jack refused to even touch because of the vendetta he had against anything peanut butter related, apparently,) to three separate bags of Lime flavored chips that ranged from the original version, to kettle cooked and rice chips, and the three cases of Mountain Dew, Smirnoff Ice, and Vitamin Water— God, these boys bought snacks as if your house was entirely bare, instead of full of perfectly good food. Regardless, however, you watched as they all worked in tandem to scan, bag, and then push the cart back to your car, load everything up in a swift manner, and even get in the car with no complaints. As weird as the Hughes brothers were, they sure knew how to work as a team— to ensure that no single brother carried the load of the work, but instead simply work in what you could only describe as harmony. Each completing their portion fo the task, and doing so without even having to ask; a well-oiled machine you knew was built from their childhoods, and from the years and years of hockey camps, or cheering the others on, and of simply being brothers.

Luke was the beginner of the group; he’d start the task, fall into his role, and wait for the other two to join him. Jack would follow— would see what Luke needed and do whatever he could to ease it, or to make it go faster; to be more efficient. And then Quinn, as older brother, would ensure that the other two were taken care of, before putting himself at the end— tying up their loose ends, making sure what was being done was done in a correct manner, and closing it off. A perfectly coordinated team. 

It wasn’t until the four of you got back to your shared home with Luke that all hell seemed to break loose once again. While the car ride back had been relatively tame, you driving because you had decided you were the only one who didn’t love hitting every single curb, and didn’t break like a semi-truck had rolled over right in front of you, Luke had sat in the passenger seat, connecting his phone to the aux and playing the signature Hughes Brothers Playlist— a playlist that seemed to disobey every single law of organization to have ever existed, as it would switch from some country song he liked at the moment, to LMFAO and Lil Jon’s “SHOTS,” until swiftly moving to Adele’s “Hello.” All three brothers sang to every single song, though. All without missing a single beat. 

Odd music choices aside, however, when the four of you ended up back at your house, you could hear the three of them yelling and moving around downstairs as you got ready for bed, before tapering off into the sounds of what was unmistakably Call of Duty. Before you went to bed, though, you made your way out of you and Luke’s shared bedroom, standing at the top of the staircase and looking down into the living room. You knew these sleepovers were sacred to them, and you wanted to give all three of them space— you knew, and could see, how much they cared for each other, and at times, these were the only opportunities they had to spend time together during the season, so you opted to spend time with yourself instead— even if that included letting them make a mess out of your living room.

Seemingly in the span of less than five minutes, all three boys had managed to not only push your sectional sofa to the wall, but also bring out all six dining chairs out, and set up the three pairs of sheets you had in the linen closet diagonally— laying them atop of the backs of the chairs, and adding support to their makeshift fort with the otterman, and the two kitchen bar stools. In the middle, however, you could see the three of them sitting side-by-side, all with a controller in their hands, and all trying to beat whatever game they had on— cheering on Quinn and he managed to take down their opponent, and then egging on Jack as he seemingly lost. 

As you made your way back to your room, however, the board under your foot creaked, and Luke’s head shot up to look at you— giving you a smile and you looked back down at him. “Going to sleep already, honey?” he asked, still looking up, and ignoring the looks that his brothers shared over his head. 

The other two Hughes brothers adored you— although they were a bit apprehensive when Luke first brought you home, only a few weeks after he left Michigan, you had grown to be apart of the family, and they saw you as the little sister, (and nuisance,) that was perfect for their little brother, especially when you joined Luke in egging them on as to why neither elder brother had bothered to find themselves someone yet. 

“Yeah, bub. Gonna head to bed. Remember boys, the blankets are in the hallway closet! And your toothbrushes are in the guestroom bath! Goodnight boys!” you said, yelling the last part a bit louder. You were met with a chorus of “Goodnight Y/N!” and “Thank you!” before the sounds of the three arguing won over the game once again, and you retreated back into your bed, falling asleep almost instantly.

Later, however, you were woken up by a sweltering heat. You didn’t remember it being so hot when you went to bed, and when you got up to move, you felt the arms wrapped around you— Luke, you thought. He only pulled you to him tighter, and when you turned to meet his face, you whispered his name quietly. 

“Luke, sweetheart,” you said, trying to get his attention, and asking why he was with you instead of his brothers. The only response you got from him, however, was a “Hmm?”

“Why are you in bed with me?” you asked quietly, trying to keep your voice down. “Missed you, sweetheart,” he mumbled back, his eyes still closed. While that didn’t answer your question in the slightest, the next voice that popped up did. 

“Can you guys shut up and stop being so coupley? Some of us are trying to sleep here,” he said from beside Luke, and before you could even ask as to why the hell he was in your bed to begin with, you heard Quinn’s voice next— “Lu dragged us in here. Said he didn’t wanna sleep without you” he yawned. 

You only stayed quiet, laughing at the situation. Here you were, encompassed by your boyfriend, while his two older brothers were laying on the other side of him, all because they wanted to sleep over with him, and all because he didn’t want to sleep without you. These Hughes Brothers Sleepovers sure were something, you thought, before joining the other three and falling back asleep.

#luke hughes #quinn hughes #jack hughes #luke hughes x reader #luke hughes imagine #the hughes brothers #nhl imagine #nhl blurb

[wineauntie]

quinn comforting evie while she has a tantrum. maybe her mom is just getting really frustrated and about to cry so quinn tells her to take a break and he takes over?

YOU’RE BREAKING MY HEART, BUG — Quinn Hughes x single mom!reader

universe masterlist

summary: one tantrum + a very tired mom = a bitter recipe for disaster, luckily Quinn is there to sweeten things up.

note: this is based on the request above! I got this request a while ago and was inspired because I’ve missed these three so much <333

warnings: literally nothing major, child meltdown, overwhelm feeling on the readers part, Quinn being the best dad figure, use of y/n, nicknames like bug, pretty girl and sweetheart.

word count: 1.5k

You didn’t know what had gotten Evie so upset. One minute she was perfectly happy watching Bluey on the TV and the next she was bawling crying, and throwing her toys across the apartment. You’d tried to calm her down before she woke Quinn from his pre-game nap, but your little demon seemed to love to scream and cry as she went on a rampage of throwing and kicking things.

You’d never seen Evie this hysterically before. She was a relatively well-behaved kid, and even now, at the age of three, she was tame and angelic...well up until the past few weeks. You supposed these were the 'terrible threes', that mothers online used to rant about.

The age where every small drop in the ocean for a grown person was a tumultuous tidal wave for the kid.

“C’mon, Evie,” you pleaded, your lip between your teeth as you begged with your child. “We don’t throw or kick in this apartment, baby, please, what’s the matter?”

Your words were met with Evie’s raging tears as she let out another shriek and flung her plastic Barbie at your head. Too distracted by her tears to react, the doll hit you smack in the middle of your face.

“Evie, enough!” You eventually snapped as she picked up another and poised it to be thrown whilst your hand cradled your nose. You never raised your voice with Evie, at least not when scolding her, but your patience was wearing thin and Evie’s tantrum paired with the lack of sleep you’d gotten last night, really was the straw that broke the camel's back. “We don’t throw things, not here, not ever.”

“No!” Evie hollered, her mouth open wide, her teeth bared like a vicious dog. The Barbie in her hand was thrown towards you but before you could reach out and stop it, someone had already grasped it out of the air and held it.

You heard jerked to the side where Quinn stood over your sitting form. His eyebrows were scrunched in worry, and his eyes shallowed by bags beneath them. Your heart sunk as tears pooled in your eyes, the guilt of waking him adding to the overwhelm you were experiencing.

“Q…I’m so sorry,” you rushed to say, the tears still lingering on your waterline, threatening to spill over. “Please, go back to bed, I’ll sort her out.”

Without a word, Quinn crouched down, his eyes on you as Evie wailed out once more. “Don’t apologise,” his warm voice soothed, cupping your face whilst his thumbs ran across the underneath of your eyes as he caught a few stray tears. “What’s the matter, pretty girl?”

“I don’t know what’s wrong with Evie,” you sniffed, leaning into Quinn’s warmth and comfort. “She just got upset and started throwing things and I can usually handle it but…she just won’t stop crying and I don't know what's wrong.”

Quinn’s heart cracked at the look of defeat plastered across your face as you spoke. His eyes glanced towards Evie, who was red in the face, with tears and snot streaked down her miserable face.

“Why don’t you go to the bathroom and grab yourself a glass of water?” Quinn calmly suggested, his thumbs caressing your cheekbones. “I’ll take care of her.”

Too tired to argue, you found yourself silently nodding as Quinn pressed a chaste kiss to your forehead.

As you left the room, Quinn scoured across the floor to sit beside Evie, who had thrown herself face down on the ground, her body trembling as he waited for her to notice his movement towards her.

The stubborn little girl refused to lift her head, prompting Quinn to raise his hand and slowly rub it up and down her back comfortingly.

"Hey, Evie," Quinn softly spoke up, his voice a gentle murmur as he tried to break through her stupor. He stroked her back, feeling the tension gradually ease from her small frame at the mere sound of his voice, yet despite her small moment of relaxation, it still shook from the power of her cries. "You're breaking my heart, Bug...it's alright, c'mon now."

Evie's sobs began to subside, replaced by fractured hiccups as she slowly lifted her head, tear-streaked cheeks glistening under the apartment lights. Her watery eyes met Quinn's gaze, and for a moment, he saw a mixture of confusion and sadness reflected in them.

"Whatever it is that's bothering you, it'll be alright," Quinn hummed, whilst his hand brushed Evie's messy hair out of her face before he reached out and gently wiped away a stray tear from her cheek with his thumb. "Can you tell me what happened?" he asked, his tone warm and reassuring.

He watched as Evie's bottom lip trembled, her mouth opening and closing as if trying to figure out what to say. Despite only being three, Evie was incredibly intelligent, Quinn believed it was all because of you and how you had raised Evie.

"Did something happen, Bug?" Quinn asked, his eyebrows furrowed as Evie held something close to her chest as she pushed herself into his lap and his awaiting hold.

Evie whimpered as her tiny hands opened to reveal the fabric of her favourite stuffed bear. "Ted broke," she mumbled between sniffles, her voice trembling with emotion.

Understanding suddenly dawned on Quinn as he realized what had triggered Evie's outburst. Ted, her beloved teddy companion, gifted to her by Luke and Jack, must have suffered some sort of mishap during her playtime, leading to her sudden meltdown.

"I see," Quinn replied softly, his heart aching for the distress written across Evie's face. He reached out and gently took the teddy from her trembling hands, examining the toy for any damage. "It looks like Ted's arm came loose," he observed, showing Evie the small tear in the fabric.

Evie's lower lip trembled as she looked at her damaged toy, fresh tears welling up in her eyes. "Fix it, Winnie," she pleaded, her voice small and vulnerable, cracking under the weight of her miserable mood. "Need Ted for my sleep!"

"Oh, Bug..." Quinn trailed off, his guilt coating his words. "I can't fix it, I can't sew." Evie's face immediately screwed up once more, flushing red as she reached the dangerous brink of another meltdown. "But I think your mom can."

"Mom fix Ted?" Evie sniffled, her bottom lip jutting outward as her widened eyes scanned his for any ounce of a lie.

"Your mom's pretty good like that," Quinn nodded, his arms hugging Evie closer to his body. "She likes to help you out, you know?... Which is why she got so upset earlier when you threw something at her. Throwing things at people, hurt them, Bug."

"I hurt mom?" Evie mumbled, sadness shrouding her features once again.

"A little bit," Quinn admitted. There was no use in sugar-coating it. Tantrums were natural for a kid of Evie's age, but you and Quinn had discussed it before and you agreed that any form of violence must be addressed if it ever arose. "Your mom is strong though, she'll be okay. But Evie, we don't throw things when we're angry. I know you got upset but we don't hurt people because of that."

"I say sorry," Evie mumbled, burying her face into Quinn's chest as he cradled her. “And no throw.”

“Good, Bug,” Quinn smiled, briefly squeezing her tighter before he met her regretful gaze. “Now how about we say sorry to Mom together?” Evie nodded slowly and bit her lip in worry.

It seemed to be perfect timing as you walked back into the living room, your body tense in anticipation. Quinn examined your refreshed face and your eyes that were no longer tinged red from tears.

“…Everything okay?” You asked tentatively, glancing between Quinn and your daughter. Evie’s head shot towards you before she burst out of Quinn’s hold and leapt towards you.

“I’m sorry!” Evie cried, hugging your legs as you looked at Quinn in shock. Quinn gave you a reassuring nod as he stood, whilst you carefully lifted Evie into your arms. “Didn’t mean hurt you!”

“Sh, sh, sh,” You soothingly tried to calm her tears and remorseful voice. “It’s alright, Evie girl, everything’s okay, I’m okay.”

Evie cuddled deep into your embrace, her arms and legs clinging to your body as Quinn pressed a soft kiss to your temple. You shut your eyes with a small smile as your daughter’s tears began to dry and as she babbled about her teddy and how she was sorry again.

You opened your eyes briefly to look at Quinn, before mouthing a quick ‘thank you’, causing him to wink at you before he retreated to the kitchen, to, no doubt, get you and Evie another glass of water each.

#wineauntie #quinn hughes x reader #quinn hughes imagine #quinn hughes fic #quinn hughes angst #quinn hughes fanfic #quinn hughes fluff #quinn hughes x single mom!reader #quinn hughes x y/n #quinn hughes blurb #quinn hughes fanfiction #quinn hughes #quinn hughes x you #family is family universe #vancouver canucks

[refiwrites]

hey, can you write some spider X reader? Like, he and her are kidnapped by his father and he tries anything to protect her, even if he dies?

i'm in the mood to write for spider (i love him so spider hate is not welcome here 😠) so if anyone else has some ideas for himm...

Whatever Happens

Pairing: Spider "Miles" Socorro x Fem! Human! Reader

Word count: 1.1k

Warning/s: ATWOW SPOILERS! Mentions of blood, torture, slight angst?

GIF is not mine, credits to the owner!

“Spider, (Y/N)!” Kiri’s voice was one of the things you heard as you tumbled off the branch along with Spider after the sudden explosion, dropping to the ground with a thud, your head hitting first as your vision began to spin.

You knitted your brows, head pounding as you looked around you. You looked to the side to see Spider, trying to stand up from the forest floor.

“(Y/N), (Y/N) come on, let’s go!” Second was Spider’s voice. You squinted as his face appeared in your vision, blurry. You felt him trying to pick you up, but it was too late, the avatars had caught up to where you both were, pulling Spider away from you.

“No- no! Let go of me! (Y/N)! Don’t touch her!”

There was another commotion as you were still dizzy from the fall, the last thing you remember was being picked up by someone and a bright light before your vision went black.

°。°。°。°。°。

When you awoke, your head still pounded. You blinked a few times trying to adjust to the light. You looked around your surroundings. The walls were white, lined with stripes of grey, there was a table in the middle, then a door.

You didn’t know where you were.

You sat upright, looking around once more until your eyes settled on a figure in front of you.

It was Spider, thrashing around in front of another window but this time it was tinted black, you couldn’t see anything through it. You watched as he threw the chair against it, it didn’t budge.

You stood up, going out of balance for a few steps but you managed to run towards him.

“Spider- Spider!!” You shouted; you could tell he heard you with the way his head spun around to meet you. “(Y/N)!!” He responded, running towards you yet there was a huge mirror that separated the two of your rooms.

“Spider- where are we? What is this?” You asked, looking around, your chest heaving.

“(Y/N), calm down, look at me, hey.” Spider says, placing his palm flat on the window. “Listen to me, (Y/N).”

You looked at Spider and placed your palm against his. “I’m scared.”

“I’m here, nothing will happen to you, okay? I’ll do anything to keep you safe, got that?” Spider reassured you, placing his forehead on the glass.

You breathed out and nodded, placing your forehead to his as you closed your eyes.

“Look at this, seems like they’re close.” The man monitoring both you and Spider said as they watched from the cameras.

The two of you were now sat against the glass beside each other, talking.

Quaritch hummed before sipping on his mug. He could see the way how Spider looked at you.

If he was right, he would say the boy was in love. And it was hella radiating off you too.

“Quaritch, bring them out for questioning.” Commanded Ardmore.

He nods. “Bring them out.”

°。°。°。°。°。

“Spider!” You shouted as your hands were cuffed as you were let out the room. You heard the other room open and soon enough Spider was also let out, his hands linked together as well. “(Y/N)!”

“Do you guys ever shut up?” One of the security officers say, tugging you and Spider somewhere.

You were led to a room where there was an intimidating looking device in the middle. There were also people in lab coats working, typing away in their monitors. You paused in walking, trying to back away. But you were pushed forward as you yelped. “Hey, stop that!” Spider screamed at the man who was handling you.

“Well, if it isn’t the two lovebirds.” The two of you looked to see Quaritch.

“Listen. Either one of you has to go and lay down on that little machine there, if you want it the hard way, of course. But- we can also do this the easy way, just answer the questions we have for you.” Quaritch said.

You stayed silent, glaring at him. Spider also glared at him.

“Okay we’re doing this the hard way, my workers, my rules. Strap him up first.” Ardmore walked in, pointing at Spider. Your eyes widened as Spider was dragged up to the machine.

“Spider! No!” You fought against your restraints. “Get away from him!”

Then it began.

At first it started out slow, the green lights glowed as Spider was laid on the board. Then it began to spin faster, and faster, and faster. Your heart broke as you began to hear Spider struggle. You looked to see a hologram of what looked like his brain be observed by those in lab coats.

“Where is Jake Sully?” The woman questioned.

“I don’t know!” His voice strained as you frowned, trying to move to him but you were held on tightly. “We know that you know.” She pressed on.

“I don’t know!” He repeated.

“Stop it, please!” You begged, you looked at Quaritch to see him watching intently, his arm propped against the glass. The woman kept asking questions.

“Again, I don’t know! Let me out of here! I don’t know!” Hearing Spider’s scream tore your heart.

“Which clans would be harboring him?” Ardmore repeated.

“I don’t know! You’re going to have to kill me!”

It went on for a few more seconds as you begged anyone to stop it. Finally, Quaritch seemed to have had enough as he walked towards the general before smashing the red button to halt the machine.

You watched Spider as his body shook as his breathing was ragged.

“Spider! Spider, are you alright?!” You asked. You saw his nose started bleeding, making you more anxious. You struggled but then you managed to break free from the guard holding you. You rushed over to Spider, inspecting his face. “Spider… Spider talk to me.” You spoke. “(Y/N)?” He said.

You turned around to see Quaritch talking to the general and then her eyes shifted over to you. “Have her ready.”

°。°。°。°。°。

Spider only regained his consciousness when he was back in his cell, he opted to sit in the corner, hugging his knees to his chest as he still tried to catch his breath.

Then the sound of the door opening was heard as his eyes shifted over to it. To his surprise, it was you who was pushed into his cell.

He immediately wastes no time to scramble over to your body that was on the floor, unconscious, your nose bleeding.

“(Y/N), hey.. (Y/N)..” Spider whispered, placing your upper half on his lap as he cradled your head. He wipes off the blood from your nose as you began to open your eyes.

“Spider?” You respond, looking up at him, raising your hand to cup his cheek, then moving it to his chest, feeling his heartbeat. “It’s me, I’m here.”

You sit up, before hugging him, burying your face in his chest. You feel Spider’s lips rest on your temple.

“I’m here. I’m not going to let anything happen to you.” He whispered. “They’re going to have to kill me first.”

“You skxawng.” You comment, closing your eyes.

“Whatever happens, we’re going to make it out of here alive.”

#spider socorro #miles socorro #spider socorro x reader #miles socorro x reader #avatar the way of water #avatar the way of water spoilers #avatar the way of water x reader #avatar the way of water imagines #atwow #atwow fanfiction #atwow x reader #atwow imagines #atwow spider #avatar way of water x reader #avatar way of water imagines #pandora #avatar fanfiction #x reader #imagines #refiwrites #avatar 2009 #avatar way of water

[blueaetherr]

future histories

pairing: jude bellingham x fem!reader [she/her]

warning(s): angst, gotg vol 3 inspired [peter q. & gamora]

summary: the one where past lovers consider life beyond their tragic circumstances

author's note: this is part 2 to this imagine which i recommend reading before this one. i'm currently re-reading the book that inspired part 1 (the sun is also a star by nicola yoon), which further inspired me to write this. i also haven't written in time so forgive me for any mistakes that may be here.

tag(s): @aechii

now playing: the miseducation of lauryn hill by ms. lauryn hill

Under the mature night sky, surrounded by the stars and the comfort of the dark, a celebration was underway—an engagement party. Somewhere rural and hidden by trees standing tall and all, there was a house hosting the party of the couple-to-be in the coming weeks. The fiancé, the fiancée, bridesmaids, groomsmen and beyond in attendance. 

It was all wonderful, from the presence of everyone, the party atmosphere, Party Girls floating within and beyond the mansion. The night was set in motion and wouldn't stop for anyone until the early morning.

Still, two individuals decided to stray away. And there—wherever they wandered away to—they chose to remain in their own world, oblivious to everything else around them.

"You can't be serious, Jude!" Y/N shook her head and glanced at her friend with a pointed look. Watch your words kinda look. "Say that shit again. I dare you."

It was quiet for a moment before Jude decided to tune in again, shrugging with a smile growing on his face. "A straw has two holes."

Her face contorted, disgust evident even to the blind. "It has one."

Jude hung his head back as he let out a laugh, his laughter trailing into the night sky. Folding his arms, he asked, "You know two things can be true at the same time?" The straw debate was something that the two had been having for a few years. And yet despite his strong arguments and the backing of friends, Jude just couldn't get Y/N to be in the slightest way considerate of his side of the debate.

"And that's completely fine," she said, clasping her hands together. She was comfortable in her place and in her stance. "Just not when I make an argument for something. And I stand by what I believe."

"Okay, whatever you say," Jude raised his arms up in laughter, "Whatever you say, Y/N."

Debating with Y/N was something he always found himself enjoying. Not because he enjoyed the act of debating or because he would aim to propose an outstanding argument. It was more simply because he enjoyed watching Y/N debate, even if it was against him. Always was she animated in discussion, pushing 'til the end to prove a point that may not be entirely true. If she could somehow prove that left was actually right, then Jude would follow behind her and declare left as right.

After walking around the private grounds for some time, Y/N and Jude decided to rest and settled on a low wall. There, they were able to admire the manor house scenery. A location large and luxurious in presentation with its gardens, lakes and grass trimmed to perfection. Still, it remained cosy and informal with the absence of public bodies around; one could be unrestricted and alone with the infinite square feet that were free to wonder.

Jude and Y/N experienced both respectively, the loneliness over the freedom. Outdoors they were together alone, only accompanied by the displays of nature around them. Away from the celebration of the engaged couple, away from secret activities of the night, away and distant from the wonders that this ever manor had to offer. And when that realisation dawned upon the two everything from their talk to their moods fell.

Y/N sighed, her posture faltering a bit. "What are we doing out here?" After all, it was Jude who invited her to stray away from the party. One minute she was in the middle of a game with her friends and the next Jude was taking her away with no explanation, just pace.

Jude took her hand in his and glanced at her with a playful look. "Is it so bad that I want to get to know my bridesmaid?" Weirdly, everyone thought it would be the perfect idea to pair Jude and Y/N as a groomsman and bridesmaid together.

"Yes," Y/N scoffed out a laugh, removing her hand from his grasp. "I know a lot about you and I don't think I want to start learning more."

"That's fair, I guess," he huffed out a small laugh. But because he believed that what she said was wholefully true; he knew that other people shared her opinion so I guess that's where he had to agree. Jude then sobered up from his laughter, "I just wanted to talk to you."

Rubbing her hands together, she blew out a small breath as she looked around the vacant outdoor area. "And we have to do that outside?" The night weather wasn't too bad, though it didn't beat wanting to be indoors.

He sucked in a small breath as he rubbed the nape of his neck. "Yeah, sorry about that. It's just... I'm not tryna be inside right now. I mean..."

She meant to ask what Jude was talking about, but then she heard it. I Can't Help Falling in Love was playing, within and beyond the mansion. And Y/N could imagine the scenes inside. Everyone pushing the engaged couple to have yet another dance, ungrateful yet entertaining steps and twirls, aspiring partners taking the leap of faith with a dance that would probably lead to something more later down the line, lively dances and delight across the board.

Whatever purpose there was to dance—to sway delicately across the dancefloor, to lose oneself in the song, to hold wild thoughts regarding romance—nonetheless, it brought everything to life even if it wasn't there before. Romance, partnership, and lasting promises, all shared between two individuals. Every two individuals except for Y/N and Jude.

It was hard for them. Even though they felt nothing for each other, even though they could no longer feel anything for one another (and weren't actively seeking anything from each other), it still remained hard and unfair to be surrounded by all things love and ideal romance that reminded them that their relationship didn't work, that they themselves weren't deserving of a functional, lasting relationship.

Jude and Y/N were happy for the engagement of their friends, and they would continue to wish them the best until their final days. But being bombarded by all these things—being a groomsman and bridesmaid, everyone seemingly being in current or aspiring relationships—with their history together, one that they couldn't bring themselves to remember or hold onto in any way, witnessing their friends in the relationship that they failed to hold onto for reasons beyond them... it was overwhelming simply being at the engagement party.

"And I just want to talk to you without other people being around... without them judging us." It was weird for Jude. Being a football player meant eyes were constantly on him. He was used to it. Now people were giving him attention over his previous relationship and couldn't seem to shake off the feeling of unease off his person.

Y/N knew Jude's thoughts were real and justified. She heard the whispers speaking on her and Jude. From the wedding rehearsals to the engagement party. Both positive and negative remarks; wondering how they couldn't understand why the two broke up, speaking on why the reason the exes broke up didn't make much sense. That Y/N and Jude looked together, and that they should make up and get together for the sake of it.

In other words, the reason for Jude and Y/N breaking up wasn't valid enough in everyone's eyes.

She let her eyes trail on her legs as they swang over the ground. "It's— it's like people care more about our relationship than we do." She said it like it was a wonder, but Y/N knew well that that was just the reality of things.

"Don't even get me started with that," Jude shook his head before scoffing. "I get asked about our relationship—about you—a lot by friends and family. I mean I don't mind, it's whatever, you know? I expect now. But sometimes it's just too much. And every conversation is the same. How is Y/N? You guys still friends? I think you two still have a chance together. You should definitely ask her out."

"And I'm always polite with it and say, Y/N is fine. Yes, we're still friends I guess. Well, I don't know about that. We haven't talked about that. I hear what you're saying, but I'm not too sure about that. Polite with it. Then they'll ask me the same questions again or ask my parents. It's almost like... like..."

"Like they don't trust our judgements?" Even though she was never present for any of those conversations, Y/N and Jude shared similar experiences post-relationship. The questions, the questions repeated over and over again, the patience that came with having to deal with those repeated questions. There was something so frustrating about having to convince people that your past relationship would remain in the past with no hope of reviving it ever again. 

Not only because they didn't want to; the moon and the stars just wouldn't allow it.

"Exactly that. It's annoying 'cause everyone wants me to do something I just can't do anymore... something I can't remember doing. Like," Jude inhaled deeply as he rubbed his hands over his face. He never really was good with his words. "There's something there but it's beyond me. I could love you but I just can't. Not because I don't want to, but it's... every time I want to step forward I'm pushed back. Like it's not my fault and it's not our fault either."

There were grounds as to why Jude disliked dwelling on their relationship. Some were evident, others not so much; one being that the simple thought of the relationship gave him false hope.

In truth, he was a hopeless romantic. He loved the idea of love in all of its forms. By offering and receiving, perhaps to and from his family, friends or anyone who could reciprocate it. Like the average person, it made him feel happy in many possible ways. And when he was consumed in all that love—when he was consumed in happiness—he was more approachable and open to everyone's questions about his past relationship with Y/N. That's where the hope fell over him every single time. 

Maybe there's still something between me and Y/N. Maybe we did overreact like everyone is saying. We didn't try hard enough to fix our relationship. So when he was no longer so consumed in his hopeful thoughts, Jude would tell himself let's try again.

But then he would simply look at Y/N and reality would quickly pull him out of his thoughts. No. 

Jude could try to find the humour in Y/N's words, he could try to admire Y/N for her beauty and flaws, he could try to remain consumed in everyone's delusions about his past relationship, he could try to indulge in their past romance through the words of his mom. Jude could try anything, yet none of it would change the fact that everything he ever felt for Y/N was compromised. Anything he would ever feel for her would be compromised.

He could no longer feel anything for her. She could no longer feel anything for him. The possibility of feeling anything held no strength to exist, and that realisation always left Jude devastated. They were a lost cause. We're never getting back together, and he just had to get over it.

But that was difficult when everyone would remind him of their relationship. So he was stuck in this cycle of false hope, where he couldn't find it in himself to move on. Truthfully, Jude was unsure if he would ever be getting out of it any time soon.

"It's not our fault. It never was," she said, moving her hand in small rotation on his back to let Jude fall into her touch. All Y/N could do was sit by Jude and comfort him. In fact, all they could do was comfort one another. Because everything Jude felt, everything he couldn't feel, she was right there with him. This would be a soft moment of solace if the circumstances weren't so terrible.

Yet here they were, outside all miserable and devastated by their never-changing circumstances in a scenery so whole and picturesque. While everyone was partying—celebrating and enjoying the declaration of love of the engaged couple, dancing in rightful and infinite pairs—Jude and Y/N could only share some physical attachment knowing that was all one could offer the other. They were strangers to romantic love, so caught up in this insane cycle of misfortune.

"It drains me having to think about it every day," Jude exhaled as he sat up. Having those conversations only came with one benefit; he could exhale everything he had pented up before. "That's why I just want to move on from everything, you know? It's been months since we broke up. Like why is everyone else so hopeful about us than us?"

"If only I could tell you. You'd think they would start asking whether we're both seeing other people by now." Y/N tilted her head in thought. Caught up in her relationship and everyone's reminders of its existence, she had the tendency to forget that she existed beyond Jude. Turning to him, she wondered, "Are you seeing someone right now?"

Jude scoffed out a small laugh as he shook his head slightly. He knew Y/N met well, he did. But he did feel like the answer was evident. I'm a mess, of course not. "Do you really think I would be seeing someone if I'm all in my feelings right now?"

"Just wondering, honey."

Seeing the unspoken apology in her eyes, Jude let his person falter a bit. "Not really, no." Since Y/N the most he could entertain when it came to girls was the talking stage and he would never go beyond that.

Losing the ability to love Y/N kinda left Jude a bit scarred. According to the delicate words of his mom, he and Y/N were once the perfect relationship, a relationship where she fell but he fell harder. But everyone knew how that ended. The fear of a new relationship ending exactly like his and Y/N's, the fear of possibly not being able to love, both ultimately shied Jude away from actively putting in the effort of pursuing girls he might find interest in. "I try, I do. But it's just a lot all at once."

"I think that might be the best way of moving on," Y/N suggested, "Maybe we won't be caught up thinking about each other if we're thinking about other people. It's hard, but it takes time. When you get there, you get there."

He nodded slightly. He wasn't in total agreement with Y/N but he trusted her judgement. "Yeah, maybe. Wait," Jude paused in his place before his eyes grew wide. "Why are you saying it like that?" Suddenly, it dawned on Jude. Y/N was speaking from experience. "Are you seeing someone?"

"Jude."

"Wait, why didn't you tell me before?"

"Just listen to me, Jude—"

"I literally dragged you out here. I don't want him to think I'm making a move—"

"Jude!" Her voice, firm rather than harsh, managed to reach his ears which stopped Jude from his ranting. Unknown to both of them, that was the same voice she had used to resolve problems during their relationship. When she was sure she had Jude's attention, she continued, "I'm not seeing anyone right now. I've just recently become open to it. That's all."

Jude's glance tracked around before returning to the person beside him. "So you're looking to get into a relationship?"

"Am I actively pursuing one? No. But I won't intervene if it comes my way." Y/N was once like Jude when it came to speaking to a potential partner. She was distant and denied guys when they tried to reach out over her fears of her relationship with Jude repeating itself. But over time her thoughts have eased and even though she wasn't exactly there yet, there was some noticeable progress to highlight. She was no longer entirely tied down to Jude.

She adjusted her sitting position. The wall they were sitting on wasn't the most comfortable. "I don't know about you, but I don't want us to be the one thing that people know us for. Like sure we ended on confusing terms according to everyone else, but what can we do? I mean it was out of our hands even before we met. I don't want to be caught up over it forever. We have to find ourselves moving away from all of that somehow." 

Y/N learned a lot from her relationship with Jude. They were never truly a real match and they were invalid on many levels. Others could remember their relationship in ways she couldn't, to the point she could only dream of something so perfect and that left her dejected every time.

But moving forward she wanted things to change where she could. The perception others held of her and Jude would remain the same until time deemed otherwise. What she could change, what she could control were her thoughts and actions. Now she could think about Jude and tell herself that everything happens for a reason, that they were an unfortunate case but things happen, that it was okay for her to move forward by herself or with someone else.

She couldn't be so attached to Jude knowing there never was a future for them together in the first place.

"I get it," Jude frowned as he nodded along to her words. Logical and practical. He couldn't find himself arguing against them. He took in a small breath and offered Y/N a small smile. "Well, I'm... I'm happy for you."

"Oh yeah?" Y/N grinned though it was small and unsure. After all, she knew Jude was the more emotional one between the two. She wouldn't have been surprised if he hadn't been so open to her advice.

The thing is though, Jude was happy for Y/N, truly. Or, at least for the most part. Where he wasn't was simply just his current fears. His fears of being stuck in one place forever. His fears of being left behind. His fears of not being able to relate with Y/N on their unique experience of falling out together. Fears that if he lost Y/N then he would have no one to lean on, that he would have no one.

But hearing her story—something full of hope, clarity and purpose for something new—that's where he was happy. Maybe being a hopeless romantic wasn't such a dumb idea to have; he just had to shift his direction of thought and look forward to their future histories, separate or together.

Once again Jude offered Y/N a smile, one wide, kind and truthful. "Of course," he said as he brought her into a side hug, the two swaying softly in tune with the timid breeze. "That's all I can be for you."

Pulling away, Y/N asked, "You sure? I hope I didn't say anything in a way that would upset you. I just don't want us to bond over such depressing shit all the time." She had a feeling that those conversations would come to an end sooner or later.

"Yeah, you're right," Jude sighed with a nod, almost reassuring himself that everything would be okay moving forward. His eyes drifted toward the mansion where everything still remained lively. The discomfort was still there observing the scene, though he felt it diminish—and it would continue to falter with time. I'll be okay. "I get it and I meant when I said that I'm happy for you. I want that for myself too. It's actually not all that bad."

"Why do you say that?"

"You didn't hear this from me but apparently... I once promised you that I'd be the first person to walk you up and down the aisle."

And that was the last time Jude looked back at their relationship through his mom.

#jude bellingham #jude bellingham x reader #jude bellingham blurbs #jude bellingham imagines #jude bellingham imagine #jude bellingham x black!reader #black!reader #jude bellingham fanfiction #jude bellingam fluff #jude bellingham angst #football imagines #football fanfiction #football blurbs #football oneshots

[amywritesthings]

boston holiday. / a joel holiday ficlet

pairing: joel miller x f!reader ( the last of us ) word count: 1.5k summary: You're decorating for the holidays in your Boston Quarantine Zone apartment. A begrudging Joel Miller gets involved. tags: domestic fluff, pre-tlou, explicit language, holiday decorating in the apocalypse, set 6 months after 'seeing you / seeing me' credit: dividers by @saradika

welcome to the third day of the twelve days of amymas 2023 !!!

“The hell’re you doing, girl?”

Only two people have the key to your place.

One of them is Tess Servopoulos.

Giving Tess a spare key was necessary — or so she's claimed, since according to her, she can't trust you to stay out of trouble for longer than twenty minutes.

(She isn't wrong.)

However, you’d love to argue that somehow you have become the saint in this duo.

Ever since that week at Miller's place, every deal has gone smoother than running water. For the last couple of months, you've been clean. Unseen. Invisible.

Tess, on the other hand, has always been a bad influence.

The older woman opens her mouth, starts a Boston-wide battle, and boom — sleepover for two at your place.

(After saving your ass, you'll hide her away from wandering eyes without question. Curfew punishments be damned.)

The other person that has the key to your place, well —

The other is the salt-and-pepper man watching you in mild horror as you teeter on the arm of your dilapidated couch.

(You just haven't seen him yet.)

Joel Miller has been known for his subtlety, his silence, but not around you.

Not when he holds the key to your place; a recent development.

He tends to simply show up when he wants.

You don't mind that — usually.

But his bark scares the shit out of you in the middle of stretching high, your bare toes barely touching the arm of your couch.

The hell're you doing, girl?

Hoping to tack this starting string of garland to the ceiling suddenly becomes you fighting for your life.

"Ah—!"

The surprise intrusion causes you to falter, ankle losing its balance.

You wobble once, violently twice, before falling backwards.

Joel wastes no time — he slams the front door shut, not bothering to lock it behind him, and rushes to the couch.

Like some fucked up apocalyptic fairy tale, he catches you well before you hit the ground.

Joel Miller, the reluctant hero.

For a moment you stay suspended here: feet barely touching the ground, the older man’s arms wrapped around your torso.

Joel's weather-worn face twists in a concerned scowl.

All you can do is cheekily smile.

“Hey, Miller.”

“Don’t fucking hey me,” he snaps. “Are you trying to get yourself killed?”

“To be fair, I thought I could reach it.” He stares, so you supply: "The ceiling. I thought I could reach the ceiling."

“You’ve got the tallest goddamn ceilings in the Boston Q-Z,” Joel argues in return, setting you down to properly stand. You hold onto the sleeves of his flannel shirt until you get your footing. “Ain’t no way in hell you were reaching anything.”

He lets go of you to stare at the ceiling like he's ready to pick a fight with it, before dropping his chin.

The man stops moving when he picks up the fallen string of fake green vines strewn across your scratched hardwood floor.

The question is silent: what the hell is this?

You cross your arms over your chest, wishing you had a better excuse.

A funny one that doesn't make you look so childish, especially in front of Joel Miller.

Still, you're a bad liar around him, so you choose to stare at the garland instead of him when you confess.

“I was trying to get the holiday spirit going.”

When you blink up to Joel, your suspicions of confusion are correct: he stares back like you’ve sprouted a second head and become a clicker in the flesh.

A beat passes.

Then another.

“The what now?”

You playfully roll your eyes and walk away towards your radio. Hovering over it, your fingertips reach to toy with the dials until white static takes over the apartment silence.

That radio is the only reliable device in your endless collection of junk, though it's had to go through some repairs this year.

Thanks to Joel it still works, though he won't let you thank him.

(Not verbally, anyway. There are always loopholes in the middle of the night.)

“Every year I do this,” you explain, turning each dial with care until the local radio station comes over the airwaves.

"You... decorate."

Clearly he's unimpressed.

"Yeah," you reply. "Between leaving the Q-Z and scavenging the nearby neighborhoods, I find junk all the time. Snowman trinkets and elf knick-knacks and other stupid shit no one ever touches because it's all useless. I keep all of them in a box until the holidays. My collection's actually grown exponentially over the years.”

Two boxes full, actually.

Forgotten treasures of other families, now kept sacred on your mantle.

“Sounds like a waste of time,” Joel scoffs.

“It is,” you agree once you find the right channel before standing at full height with a tiny smile, "but that time makes me happy, so I’m happy to waste it. What else am I supposed to do between jobs?”

He considers those words, if just for a moment.

Joel scrunches his nose and eyes in a way that says he's debating on being mean.

You don't expect him to get it.

He's been through shit, but so has everyone in this quarantine zone.

(So have you.)

The Eagles croon in the background — not exactly holiday cheer, but any vinyl or CDs of the greats like Bing Crosby and Frank Sinatra singing holiday songs are probably nonexistent from the decay of time.

Besides, you can’t imagine many others are trying to keep the holidays afloat in the quarantine zone. Some families, sure, but not many.

Too much heartbreak. Too much loss.

But you've had enough sadness, so you try to bring a little light to your humble abode.

"Don't worry about it, Joel," you add after an uncomfortable amount of silence passes. "I know it's stupid. There's a fresh bottle of stored whiskey in the—"

All words die on your tongue when some kind of winter miracle happens:

Rather than tossing the garland string to the side, Joel turns on the heel of his boot and away from you.

"Joel?"

He carefully slips off his shoes, revealing worn-white socks, and steps on your couch cushion.

With care, he reaches for the ceiling.

A strip of his bare lower back reveals itself in his stretch.

“What are you... doing?” you inquire, stepping around your couch to face him.

He doesn't look down, determined to stare at the white canvas of your ceiling.

Searching.

Your line of sight is in direct contact with the dark happy trail poking from his shirt, causing your face to burn.

“What’s it look like I’m doing?” he retorts.

“You said it was a waste of time.”

“You dying because you wanna try and stick some stupid tree shit up on your ceiling is more of a waste of time. You got tape or something?”

“Seriously?”

He peers down at you. 

“Do I look like I’m kidding?" he retorts. "Get the damn tape.”

You have to try not to smile too wide when you step away, rummaging through your box of supplies.

Truthfully nothing in this box is worth keeping — none of it will save your life in the apocalypse — but your mental sanity thanks you for it every year.

After finding a roll that’s still sticky, you return to the couch and hold it up for him.

Joel grunts in gratitude, focusing his efforts solely on the line of green above him.

He manages to press the start of the decoration in place, holding the bottom of it to you.

“You want big loops or little?”

“What’ll stick better, Miller?”

He gives you a warning look. “Joel.”

A smile spreads like wildfire against your lips.

“...what’ll stick better, Joel?”

That seems to satisfy him.

“Hell if I know,” he grumbles, “just tell me what you prefer and I’ll do it.”

Something stirs in your lower belly as he speaks.

Joel didn’t have to do this.

He didn’t have to do any of it.

You were perfectly fine with keeping your need for holiday cheer to yourself, but he’s stepped in without so much as a fuss.

He’s had a hard life. Tess has alluded to the fact that he was once a father before.

You can only imagine how much he hates this, but he’s still trying.

For you.

It’s not a favor you will easily forget.

Your fading candles burn out in the background as the two of you go through every part of your assorted holiday decorations, popping open a bottle of smuggled whiskey to keep yourselves dehydrated. 

You direct. Joel places.

After some time you both get too tipsy to put the finishing touches.

(Too busy slow dancing in the middle of your living room to the ballads of Patsy Cline.)

Making jokes.

Enjoying warmth.

Choosing life.

It’s the first night Joel Miller ever sleeps at your place.

You both stay in bed long after the sun rises.

.

#joel miller x reader #joel miller x you #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller fluff #tlou fanfiction #tlou fanfic #tlou fic #tlou fluff #the last of us fic #joel miller fic #the last of us fanfiction #the last of us fanfic #holiday fanfic #holiday one shot #holiday fluff #twelve days of amymas #amywritesthings #fic: boston holiday

[slafkovskys]

is there any moment when luke and angel arent together that they end up seeing one another all alone in one room? like i imagine the entire hughes family tries their best for that to not happen when theyre not there with her but … it kind of is inevitable, isnt it?

she can’t deny the pit that forms in her stomach when she sees his car parked in the driveway. she shakes away the feeling, killing the engine and grabbing her bag from the passenger seat before making her way towards the front door because surely he wasn’t- he couldn’t be.

she twists the door knob, staring down at a picture that quinn had sent of drew and jim chilling in a golf cart captioned caddies as she waltzes through like she owned the place. the house was abnormally quiet, ellen’s usual shuffling around absent which causes her to look up and she stops in the middle of the hallway at the sight of him.

they stare at each other for a moment frozen in place. the last time that she had seen luke was from a distance at the cup parade two months before and he looked so different. his hair was a little longer, he had some attempt at facial hair sprouting along his jaw, and his eyes were a little brighter than they had been for the last year. he looked, well, he looked good.

he blinks, the confusion evident on his face as he utters the words, “are you okay?”

“why wouldn’t i be?” she says before realizing that to him at least, she had walked into the house without any warning. it was something that she had grown used to doing over the years, even after their falling out when it was an unspoken rule that whenever she was there, luke would miraculously always have plans. she shakes her head, “no, i- i’m sorry. ellen and i, we were going to go grab some lunch today and i was supposed to meet her here.”

“are you sure that it was today? she just left for some meeting like twenty minutes ago,” luke raises his eyebrows and her face falls. he watches as she pulls out her phone and closes her eyes, letting out a soft fuck. he sends her a soft grin, “let me guess, the plans are for thursday and not today?”

“i’m sorry. i really thought it said tuesday,” she stares at the screen for a second longer as if willing the word to change and when it doesn’t, she looks at the boy again. she lets out a quiet chuckle, “guess i have a free day now. q and j took the babies to the golf course-”

“with my dad?” luke finishes for her. he doesn’t seem bitter, but she could see the flicker of sadness in his eyes. he scratches the back of his neck awkwardly, “i figured when i saw him shoving two mini sets of clubs into the back of his car before he left. they’re the only babies he knows- well, the only babies he knows that he spoils like that.”

the two share a laugh at the mere thought of jim trying to coax a golf club into one of the nine month old’s hands. she had already gotten a slew of pictures from the boys, one of wren wearing a glove that was basically the length of her arm and another of drew being balanced by quinn in one arm while he seemed to be teeing up with his free hand to which she immediately called the man and had to be reassured that drew was safely in the golf cart before quinn had even pushed his tee into the ground.

she shifts her weight from foot to foot before clearing her throat, “um, i guess i’ll get going, then. seriously, i’m sorry about this.”

“not as sorry as i am.”

“luke,” she mumbles, eyes shifting to stare at a picture of all three boys when they were kids so she wouldn’t have to look at him, “please-”

“i know, i just wanted you to hear me say it,” he pauses, “you don’t have to forgive me and i don’t expect you to, but if i could just have a chance to explain why i did it-”

“you have a good reason for leaving me during the scariest time of my life and then basically ghosting me?” she questions and she turns her attention back to luke, watching as he visibly deflates. she stares at him, the tension between the two so thick not even a chainsaw could cut through, before she shakes her head, “i’ll never forgive you for what you did to me, to us.”

luke can only nod, letting his eyes drift to the floor.

“come by the house tomorrow afternoon. the boys are done training at one, don’t come before then. the twins usually nap around three so if you want to meet them, get there before then. this is going to be the only time that i even consider hearing what you have to say,” she says and he hangs onto every word, nodding along, “don’t mess it up.”

“i won’t.”

#hughes bros x angel #luke hughes #jess writes

[thedeathlysallows]

Is It Over Now? (3)

Pairing: Aemond Targaryen x Aemma Velaryon; Aegon Targaryen x Aemma Velaryon

Summary: Was it over when she laid down on your couch? Was it over when he unbuttoned my blouse?

Warnings: canon typical Targaryen incest. Spicy content ahead but no smut

Here's the masterlist containing the other drabbles in the series!

I didn't write the full smut scene because I was worried it would be less of a drabble and more of a full chapter. If y'all want the full smut scene let me know!

You aren't how Aemond remembers you at all when he runs into you after your arrival. He's in the courtyard, practicing his swordsmanship with Ser Criston and who should walk up but your bastard brothers. They're accompanied by their father, you trailing behind the three men listlessly... bored even. You're eyes flicker about, taking in the sights of the castle you'd hoped to never see again. There's no joy in your gaze. Not anymore. Aemond isn't sure if he should be worried.

When you finally spare a glance at him he's struck by just how different you look. No longer a gangly, awkward princess, you stand in front of him with the body of a woman. All soft curves and delicate Valeryian features. His eyes linger on your hips and tits, and he decides those might be your best features if it weren't for the gentle slope of your lips as you say his name.

Aemond drops his sword immediately, the taunts of his nephews forgotten the second he hears your voice. He lifts your hand to his mouth as he bows, grazing his lips over your knuckles.

"Princess," Aemond says in greeting.

You pull your hand back, fisting it in the silk of your red dress. "Aemond. Have you seen your brother lately? I've been searching for him."

Why? he wants to demand. Why do you want that drunkard when I'm right here? He's probably off picking up some disease on the Street of Silk as we speak.

Instead, he says, "I'm afraid not, Princess."

"Hmm, pity." You look him up and down. "I'll be off then. Lovely to see you, Uncle. Boys," you give Jace and Luke a pointed glare. "Be good."

Aemond wants to stop you, wants to make you turn around and stay by his side, but he can't find the words. Instead, he takes his frustration out on your brothers by way of sparring before taking his own leave and hunting down the serving girl who has been your stand in for months now.

You, on the other hand, search the Red Keep for Aegon. You've already seen and spent time with Helaena, fawning over her and her children even if the reunion was a bit stiff and awkward. You like Helaena, love her even. She's by far the sweetest person you've ever met. How she's lasted in a marriage to Aegon, you'll never know.

He wrote you letters while you were at Dragonstone. As did Aemond. You answered Aegon more often, though. Maybe it was out of some strange, misplaced sense of loyalty that you did so. Aegon was supposed to be your husband after all. Even with his many, many, many... personality defects... you still feel closest to him after all these years.

"Oh, excuse me!" You stop a young serving girl who is in the middle of leaving what you remember to be Aemond's chambers. She's a pretty blonde with a kind smile. "Have you seen Prince Aegon?"

She shakes her head. "No, your highness, I'm sorry. I... I thought I saw the Queen going in his chambers earlier."

You nod. "Thank you..."

"Emma, your highness." She curtsies and looks to the ground.

"Emma. Thank you." You walk further down the hall, counting doors until you come to what you know to be Aegon's chambers.

The décor around the Red Keep has changed immensely since you've been gone. Many of the more obscene tapestries that imprinted themselves in your young mind are gone, replaced with religious imagery of the Seven. You can only imagine the fit Daemon is throwing over the change. Honestly, you don't really feel one way or another about it as long as it was your grandfather's decision, but a large part of you knows it was likely Alicent's doing.

Speaking of, the Queen exits Aegon's chambers right as you're about to announce yourself. She gives you no more than a tight lipped smile, exhaustion and disappointment dimming her eyes.

You cautiously make your way inside. "What was that about?"

Aegon sits on his bed with his head in his hands, a simple white sheet covering his lap. He perks up when he hears your voice and you can't help but return his boyish grin. "Nothing. Something about some serving girl I don't even remember."

"I don't believe you."

"Good. You shouldn't. I'm a bad, bad man."

You pour yourself some wine from the pitcher on his bedside table. "Self deprecation doesn't suit you."

"Who said it was self deprecation? I hurt everyone around me." Aegon sighs and leans back in bed, patting the empty spot beside him.

You know better than to get in Aegon's bed, but he just looks so pathetic. And maybe that's why you favor him so much. You have a soft spot for sad, broken, pathetic things. Aegon knows this. Just as you know he plays on your feelings. What you can't figure out is why you allow it. If anyone else were to treat you the way Aegon does you would feed them to Vermithor... and yet your uncle is allowed to do as he pleases with your heart.

"Remember the game we would play when we were betrothed?" Aegon bunches your skirt in his fist, dragging it up your thigh slowly. The silk tickles against your bare skin.

You can feel your heart pounding in your chest. "Yes."

"Care to play again, niece?"

Aegon is allowed to do as he pleases with your heart just as he is allowed to do as he pleases with your body.

"Yes." The word comes out in an almost whimper and Aegon's smile turns predatory.

"Yes what?"

"Yes, my prince."

Aegon pushes the blanket from his lap and pulls you down on top of him. There's the sound of your dress ripping and Aegon's moan of pleasure.

"Good girl," he whispers in your ear. "You've always been my good girl."

#aemond targaryen x you #aemond targaryen x reader #aegon targaryen x reader #aegon targaryen x you

[sophieswundergarten]

Does anybody remember the weird and excessively long post I made in the middle of the night earlier this week about S. Q. being psychic? Well I just did, so here's round two:

Once he shows up at the Benedict household it becomes highly apparent that he's psychic. The kid himself isn't aware of it, since he didn't talk to that many people at the Institute, so there's a little confusion at first by how strangely he's acting. At least, until Constance walks over and is like "Reynie, why didn't you tell anyone he's psychic? That seems like it would have been an important detail to mention.", at which point there's dead silence. S. Q. is certain that he's not psychic, and says so emphatically, until Mr. Benedict points out that he's been automatically covering his ears since Constance made her announcement, despite no one having said a word.

He sheepishly lowers his hands, at which point Constance grabs his arm and pulls him upstairs to her room (Which, while being close to the adults', is her private space, and she know's everyone will stay away while they decide what to do). She tugs a weighted blanket off her bed and shoves it at him, waiting until he's settled before asking questions.

Constance: "So, you can hear people's thoughts."

S. Q.: "Kind of? I guess. I haven't been around a lot of people before, so it hasn't been as obvious."

Constance: "But you can sense it now?"

S. Q.: "Yeah. I can still kind of hear everyone from downstairs, but it's not that bad, now." [He winces before looking curiously at her] "Yours aren't as loud, though."

Constance shrugs: "That is because I am dampening them. Can you not do that?"

S. Q.: "No, I can't really do anything. I didn't know that this was a thing until just now."

Constance: "Right. Well," [She closes her eyes, tilting her head slightly in concentration] "How is that? Better?"

S. Q., quietly surprised: "Yeah.Yeah, actually." [He looks toward the door] "How did you do that? I can barely hear them anymore."

Constance: "It is something I was experimenting with on the island, with the Emergency messages and everything. I won't be able to do it very much, though, so we'll have to find another method."

S. Q., nodding: "Okay. Thank you. You don't need to do it, though. I'll be able to figure it out on my own."

Constance, staring at him with disdain: "Right, and you're going to be figuring it out like you did downstairs? You'll go through life with your hands over your ears?"

S. Q., making a face: "Good point. Um, what do you do when things get too loud?"

So Constance stays with him for a while, sharing various tactics to quiet his mind (Using physical sensations to ground, reading with someone, and journaling among them). After a bit, Rhonda is elected to go and check on the two of them. S. Q. is doing a lot better, and so he agrees to come back down and talk to Mr. Benedict about everything. The other kids have been asked to go wait in the backyard for a bit, but Constance stubbornly stays with S. Q. It is decided that, since he obviously needs someone to help him, he's going to be staying with them for a while. He can live in one of the rooms that's further from the center of the house, and Constance and Mr. Benedict (as the only people remotely close to an authority on the subject) will work with him on how to control the constant influx/outflow of thoughts. S. Q., luckily, had grabbed one of Curtain's notebooks before leaving, so they have that to go off of. And, with a little bit of time, he gets better.

It goes much smoother because when words aren't helping Constance is able to simply shove the concept into S. Q.'s brain. (This doesn't make her sick because a) She isn't changing his thoughts, just adding information, and b) S. Q. is aware and open to it; he wants her to do it) The best bit is that, after a few weeks of working at it, S. Q. is comfortable being around the rest of the family most of the time. But he and Constance don't stop having entire silent conversations, so they'll be in a room full of people and suddenly someone notices that Constance has been really quiet, only to find her apparently engaged in a staring contest with S. Q. It's great.

#so #um #sorry guys #i know this is totally bonkers and you probably didn't want to hear about it #but it wouldn't leave my brain so i had to release it here in order to get other things done #i hope it isn't too confusing and weird #maybe i'll talk more about it later #we'll have to see if the bees leave me alone #and i didn't even get to the benedict twin parallels! #that was where most of this started #that and @kneeslapworthy 's post about the possible implications of the “george” bird #sorry again for being so wacky! #we will now (hopefully) return to your regularly scheduled programming #(whatever that is) #mbs #the mysterious benedict society #constance contraire #sq pedalian

[darklydeliciousdesires]

Paradise Circus - Chapter Twelve.

As usual, a huge thanks for the PCBC! Your continued readership makes me so happy! :) 

Previous chapters - One  Two  Three  Four  Five  Six  Seven  Eight  Nine  Ten  Eleven

Tag list - In the comments

Words - 2,703

Warnings - 18+ content throughout. NO MINORS, PLEASE!

“Come on, ladies. None of you are sweating enough yet!”

“Hear that, Laura? He likes it when we're wet!”

“I like it when you’re working hard, Lisa, not chit chatting.”

“Was it because I mentioned being wet? Am I distracting you, Tommy?”

“Okay, jumping jacks. I want thirty, go!”

Darla could barely breathe at Lisa’s comment, the women an absolute riot. Tommy had been right; they were shameless flirts with him. Who wouldn’t be, though? For them, he was probably the greatest eye candy in the world.  

“Darla, you’re barely clearing ground. Jump higher.”

“Screw you!”

“Later,” he muttered, maybe not quietly enough.

“Ooooh, is she your girlfriend, Tommy?” Valerie, his favourite of the group cooed. She was his favourite because she mostly left him alone, but in that moment, much to Tommy’s embarrassment, she couldn’t help herself.

“Is she, Tommy?” Lisa then asked, panting hard. “What, you’re going to break all our hearts by telling us you’re taken?”

“Keep going, seventeen, eighteen, come on, you’re over halfway, twenty,” he continued, not giving them the response they were poking at him for. “Okay, and rest. Nicely done.”

Walking over to Darla, he cracked up when she gave him the middle finger, so out of breath, she could barely even sip her water. “I’m dead, you’ve killed me.”  

Leaning in close, this time, he made sure she was definitely the only one who could hear. “I’ll go down on you for an hour to make up for it.”

“I’m setting a timer!” she replied brightly, winking, making him laugh. Once the training session was over and they’d gone back to his place and showered, he very much stuck to his promise.  

“I’m thinking I should just stay at H, personally,” he told her, after beginning to lick each letter of the alphabet with the tip of his tongue over her clit. “I... J... K...”

“Oh my god!”  

“H and K are winners. I’m storing that for the future.”

She wriggled against his mouth, lost in the utter carnal bliss his tongue evoked within her, Tommy continuing. She nearly lost her mind when he got to Q.  

“So, it’s H, K, Q and Y. Mental notes have been made. And now, to repeat them.”

He did, and Darla trembled in bliss as he licked the letters over her bundle, again and again, her thighs skimming his stubbly face, the scruff of his short beard scratchy against her skin, her nails trailing his scalp as she moaned helplessly. Her clit was tingling with pleasure, little skitters rocking her core as he continued, stopping to suck every so often, two thick fingers finding their way inside her, crooking, rubbing at her as he ate her ruinously.  

“Please don’t stop, I’m gonna cum, fuck!” she cried, her body tensing before the light blazed through her, her body a fit of judders in the wake of her release, Tommy moving his mouth to her inner thigh, his fingers gentle as he felt her flutter around them, giving her a few moments to cool down before he returned his tongue. He did say an hour, after all.  

She throbbed against each lick, each carefully administered swirl of his hungry tongue, still a little oversensitive as her nails flexed at his thick shoulders, her hips keening against the utter glory of what his mouth conjured against her. H, K, Q and Y. Those letters definitely had much different meaning to her now.  

He drew hisses and mewls from her as she panted softly, her body spasming hard as he began to suck her bud, Darla unsure if she was pulling away or shunting closer, crying out as he ate her fervently and without pause. Those women from the boot camp class would be green with envy if they knew what their coach was doing to her right at that moment, Darla smirking to herself somewhat that she got him all to herself. Well... that remained to be seen. Of course, had confided that he’d enjoyed his date with Cassie despite not being in the right headspace for it, so who knew what would happen there?

Would he keep seeing her? If so, where did that leave them? She knew they were trying to get along as friends mostly to begin with, to decide sensibly on the course of whether she remained pregnant or not, but then, the sexual side of it, it did confuse her. Maybe they shouldn’t be tumbling into bed with one another at any given moment?  

“Hey, what’s up? You’ve gone all tense, and quiet,” he observed, emerging from between her legs, fingertips stroking her thighs as he kissed her pubic mound.  

“Nothing, it’s okay. I just had a panic for a minute thinking I’d left my front door open.”

“Nah, you locked it. I saw you do it. Now, stop thinking of anything that ain’t me wrecking this perfect little pussy with my mouth.”

That wasn’t difficult at all, Tommy beginning to have her sparking wildly against each well-placed lick, his mouth making her tighten, a smile playing his lips as he watched her writhe. “There you go, beautiful. You enjoy yourself. Fuck, you’re so gorgeous.”  

Was that really something that somebody who was just a friend would say? Was it? ‘Darla, you have to stop! The man is face down on your lady business and you’re working yourself up into a state. Just go with it now and think later, fucks sake!’ she fumed internally.

The heat of his tongue had her literally melting for him, Tommy panting against her dewy folds as he assailed her clit with firm circles, driving out pleasure from the very root of her, the sunshine of her building release glimmering through her as her hips purled and flexed.  

“Oh, Tommy! Oh, fuck!” She cried, another orgasm upon her rapidly as he chased the coil in her belly undone and she gleamed with incandescence, erotic pulses ebbing right through to her marrow. “Come here, please. I need you inside me.”  

“You have me inside you already,” he replied, wiggling his fingers within her still-spasming cunt.  

“Don’t be cute!” she warned, smiling at his amused chuckle.  

“I’m not finished yet. Still have, hmmm, about twenty-five minutes to go until the hour is up.” He truly meant it, then. Any other time and Darla would have been thrilled, but he’d gotten her so worked up, she ached for nothing other than his cock. This time, he could barely touch her, she was so overstimulated, so instead kissed all around her labia instead, those thirsty kisses moving to her abs, her hips, up her sides, his mouth on hers as she rubbed her slick and then wrapped it around his cock, gently pulling from base to tip, her thumb swirling at the head making him shudder.  

“Fuck, you’re too good at hand jobs, I swear,” he grunted, her lower lip sliding out from between the crush of his teeth. “Fuck me, ahh.”  

His fingers continuing circling her sensitive walls, the sweltering flush of pleasure beginning to wind once more as her body settled, his thumb moving to her clit and stroking from side to side, his mouth burying at her neck as he panted, beginning to slowly pump against her hand. His groan was rich and filthily indulgent as he trembled within her grasp, Darla knowing that she had him, craving to be inside of her.  

He forced the air from her lungs after shifting to sink into her, pushing right into her very depths, cursing at the grateful clench of her hot walls around him, dragging back in slow and sumptuous retreat.  

“Want me to do that again?” he teased, tantalising her by leaving just the head of his hardness within her, the stretch at her pulsing entrance illimitably good.  

“Please!” she almost sobbed unashamedly, Tommy raising his eyebrows. “And get that damned smirk off your face, Conlon!” He really laughed hard then, pulling out completely, laughing more when she whacked his chest.  

“Hey, no more violence! I already have this,” he reminded her, pointing to the slightly violet bruising around his eye. “Fucking savage.”

“Then fuck me already!” she cried, grumbling, Tommy laughing through his nose.

“You’re such a beast, but you’re really something, you know that?”

“Yeah, fucking horny!” Again, he laughed softly, leaning down and kissing her.  

“I mean it.” They took a few moments to gaze at one another, something seeming to fall into place between them, another broken cord tied up nicely, Tommy pushing back into her heat as his thumbs stroked her cheeks, kissing her with affection. It made butterflies bloom in her stomach, and she knew right then that they had to try harder. They just had to, because this, this... whatever it was between them, it could be real, and if they weren’t careful, they’d ruin it before it’d even begun.  

Instead of pondering it more, she lost herself to him, falling into the rhythm he set, slow, heavy and rolling, her nails delighting in touring his huge back as they continued to share hot kisses, Darla gasping as his cock dragged sparks through her core. He grasped one of her legs, hooking it under his arm and pushing forward, taking his weight on the other. The next thrust inside her was so much deeper, her eyes virtually rolled back in her head, his mouth laying kisses down her throat, sensuality blooming wildly.  

There was no urgency to it at all, the pace languid and lazy, Tommy wanting it to last for as long as possible, even though he knew with her, it could be all uncontained fury in moments, with how she stirred him right down to his very depths. His hand wandered back and forth over her thigh, matching the strokes of his cock, her groans contented and full of bliss.  

Reaching down, she let her fingers slide either side of his cock, gasping at how wet he’d gotten her, the soaking petals of her cunt splayed around him, her fingertips gliding up to her clit, rubbing herself as she watched him, his mouth falling back to hers. The slowness was lost then, the more she moaned, spurring him on into hard speed, bringing her other leg up as he sat back on his heels, pounding her into the bed with voracious, consuming need.  

She keened and shuddered against him, capsizing, lost in the eye of his storm as he railed her hard, cock daggering into her relentlessly as he chased his own release with fervour, the culmination sharp, biting pleasure, Tommy violently fucking his climax into her as she came mere seconds after him.  

“That... was...” she panted, mouth agape, body buzzing with post-nirvana tingles.

“Yeah...” he gasped, collapsing atop her, his heart hammering strongly in his chest. “I swear, you’re the best sex I’ve ever, ever had. Coming from me, that’s a damned good compliment, too.”

“Ditto. But I can’t identify with the second part, since I sense you’re alluding to the fact you’ve got a high body count behind you,” she stated, Tommy moving off her and flopping onto his back, his chest still rising and falling heavily.

“Yeah, I’ve racked it up there over the years. Especially when I was on leave,” he confessed.

“Girls love a man in uniform. So, what’s your number?”

“I lost count at about ninety.” Her widened eyes made him snort. “Okay, what’s yours, Miss Judgey?”

“Seventeen!”  

“And I’m quiet now. Just gonna sit here, being a huge man whore silently.” Darla began to titter under her breath, her silent hiss of laughter suddenly booming, Tommy taking out the pillow from behind his head and whacking her with it. “Asshole!”

“Hey, no violence! I’m the might-be mother of your might-be child.”

“Oh, fuck off. I just banged you way harder than I hit you with that!”

“I guess it’s to my advantage, though. All that experience. You had to get that good somehow,” she reasoned, throwing the pillow back at him, Tommy placing it back behind his head.  

“Yeah, lucky you, huh?”

She shook her head, laughing still. “So modest.”  

He shrugged, looking pleased with himself. “I know what I’m good at. Now, are you gonna keep bitching, or do you want me to make you cum again some more?”

Raising her eyebrows, she grinned, Tommy shifting between her legs, kissing her navel, slowly working his way down. “That’s one hell of a refresh rate.”

“Yeah, kinda. I need to give my dick about a half hour, but there ain’t nothing wrong with my tongue.”

As soon as it connected with her clit again, she was inclined to agree. “Nope, definitely not.”

He was meant to be meeting a potential new client that afternoon, taking a pause from their activities to call them and apologise for cancelling, rescheduling it for a few days' time under the guise that he was sick in bed. It was half true, at least. It wasn’t professional, he knew that, but for once, he was actually having a good time with Darla, and it didn’t just boil down to their incredible sexual connection either.  

“What do you think it is?” He asked later, once they’d fucked themselves to exhaustion.

“I don’t think it’s anything yet, just a bunch of cells in there,” Darla replied, following Tommy’s finger with her own as he traced circles over her lower abdomen. “What do you want it to be?”

“A boy. I’d be a nightmare if it was a girl, I’d be too damn overprotective for my own good. How about you?”

“I can’t say I’ve thought about it much. All my thoughts have been over whether it’ll end up being a baby at all,” she confided, Tommy nodding.  

“It still feels very surreal, doesn’t it?”

“That it does, my friend. That it does. I’m still no closer to knowing what the hell to do either, everything else aside, which I shouldn’t really do, because us actually getting our acts together is what it all hinges upon, after all.”

He nodded, turning onto his front as he yawned. “Yeah, but we’re doing okay so far. We just have to stop biting at one another over stupid things.”

“Better communication is exactly what we need,” she added, emphasising her words by poking him in the shoulder with every one she spoke. He looked between her and his shoulder a few times, his face pissed off, smiling eventually, Darla poking him again for comedy, having her finger bitten for it.

“Oh, now homeboy really gon’ get it!”

“Yeah, you bringing it?” he gestured, Darla moving to his straddle his back quickly, but being put straight onto hers in an instant, squealing when he pinned her with ease. “Oh, that’s right, honey. Know your opponent. Trying to pin an MMA dude wasn’t in your best interests, was it?”

He tickled her, her squealing escalating. “Was it?” he asked again.

“Tommy, stop!” she shrieked, her sides hurting from the laughing, the sound of the front door closing suddenly audible.  

“Straight husband! Are you home?”

“Yeah, I’m upstairs.”

“Alright, I’ll come up!” Meadow announced, the sound of her feet pounding the stairs growing louder.

“I’m naked, though.”

“Since when has that bothered you?”

“So is Darla.”

“And I’m going back down.” She replied instantly as she turned and began descending. “Hey, cookie monster! Put something on and come hug me! It’s been too long!”

“Alright, just a sec.” Darla called, getting out of bed and into her underwear. “Can I borrow a shirt or something? My gym gear is all sweaty.”

“Top drawer over by the window, help yourself,” he said after getting up, grabbing the sweats he’d been wearing the previous morning off the back of the chair by the wardrobe and pulling them on, Darla choosing his fire department t shirt that just about buried her before heading out of the bedroom and down the stairs, the sounds of excited female squealing filling the house shortly afterwards.  

Walking into the lounge and seeing her and Meadow locked together in a huge hug, elated to see each other again after so long, confirmed it to him all the more. She definitely looked right at home in his world.  

A/N - Now, here’s the really, really important part. Did you enjoy it? If so, please don’t just redundantly click that heart. Reblog it. Also, I love to engage with my readers, so a little comment would not go amiss either! Doesn’t have to be long, just reach out. I’m all about building community here and there is nothing more lovely than readers and writers supporting one another!  

#tom hardy #tom hardy fanfiction #tom hardy fanfic #tom hardy fic #tom hardy smut #tom hardy x ofc #tom hardy x oc #tom hardy x black oc #tommy conlon #tommy conlon smut #tommy conlon fanfiction #tommy conlon fanfic #tommy conlon fic #tommy conlon x ofc #tommy conlon x oc #tommy conlon x black oc #warrior #warrior fanfiction #warrior fanfic #warrior fic #warrior smut #paradise circus story #tommy and darla

[bossbabesresearch]

Shadow Work Challenge

Q: What are some toxic habits I have?

I let my ego get in the way, which leads me to act in toxic ways. For example, if someone stops liking me, I start liking them. If they like me too much, I stop liking them. This means that I tend to give people mixed signals, because I am acting, not on my feelings about a person, but simply to gain their approval. I always feel the need to garner peoples' attention and to be the best in their eyes.

I crave attention and rely on external sources for validation.

I cut people off either way too quickly or I give them too many chances.

I value pleasure so much that I forget to be disciplined at times.

I am either very insecure or super cocky. I am trying to find a middle ground.

I worry and overthink way too much, causing myself to spiral.

I care too much about what others think of me.

I always feel like I need to win the argument or have the last word before I can walk away.

When I fall in love with someone, I romanticize them so much that I create a false sense of who they are in my head and put them on a pedestal.

I can't be alone and I rely heavily on other people for emotional support.

I think that I am open minded, but I'm actually close minded and judgmental at times when it comes to things that I don't like (sports-related things).

Because of the abuse I suffered during my teenage years, I sometimes act out of wounded feminine energy. Specifically, using men for money because it makes me feel that I have control and am somehow getting revenge on my abuser/men in general.

I have low standards when it comes to dating because I am so codependent that I will take anyone that is nice to me because I can't stand being alone with my own thoughts.

I preach boundaries all the time, but I don't uphold them.

I have a tendency to overshare.

#shadow work #personal

[wild-at-mind]

I keep thinking about why it seems tumblr kids are so weird about reclaimed slurs like queer and whatnot, and based on my own experiences I've come up with a few ideas.

1. Reclaimed slurs within the lgbtq community are more complicated than some others, and often people like certainty. E.g. if you're not black, it's easy to know if saying the n word is ok: it's not. But with words like dyke, fag or even queer, I don't think the impulse to ask yourself whether you would have been targeted by someone saying this slur to hurt is a bad one. Wait wait come on let me finish, doesn't mean I think tagging '[whatever letter] slur' everywhere is the way to go. But I think thought and reflection on your actual life experiences are a good thing. That said I am so done with the annoying, inevitable 'can bi people say it?' shit when it comes to homophobic slurs. There is no need for big fuckoff barriers and gatekeeping. We're all complicated humans and the thing with life experiences is you keep having more every day, and sexuality and gender expression evolve throughout your life. A word you would say once you might find stops applying to you as an identity, and vise versa. That's why personal reflection is all I personally care about and not whatever identity you are. Not that what I say matters. But all these nuances don't translate well online and I think some people long for the simple 'if x, then don't say y'.

2. In your teens and early 20s I think extreme black and white thinking is more common, simply because you haven't had as much life experience and your brain isn't done developing. Plus it feels good to sort people into an in group and out group, because the harder you do this, the more you can belong with that in group. It seems like on tumblr and twitter a favourite way of putting people into an out group is to find some behavior your don't like, e.g. saying a word your in group deems a slur that no one should be using. That person now officially sucks and you can warn others about them, reinforcing your in group as the safe one. I remember absolutely loving this kind of thing in my early 20s, my ocd brain adored the simple black and white, good and evil ness of it all. I would mentally sort tjmblr users into good and bad. If I wasn't sure where to stand on an issue, and the middle ground wasn't an option (you could get viciously attacked and shamed all over tumblr for not being strong enough on an issue, probably you still can), then i would 'root' for the angriest side. Usually the one saying 'x is bad' and not 'x is good, because avoiding saying or doing something has to be safer than doing it, right?

Then I got a bit older (and got on the right meds but that may have been a coincidence), and fucking hell I HATE 'discourse' now. I just can't stomach it. I love nuanced arguments and not seeing issues in black and white. I don't know what people see in it but I assume if you're younger and haven't seen this stuff a billion times before, and are seeking to belong, that probably helps.

3. With the word queer in particular, a lot of people tell the same story: 'well it was all the way reclaimed, but then TERFs came along and made people say q slur and all the kids don't know!' But that story is very simplified. Often the only proof given to strengthen it is 'my college campus in the mid 2000s had a queer studies degree '. In reality most people don't go to university, and your comfort with the word queer varies greatly depending on your life experience, which is affected by age, class and your specific identities within the lgbtq community. (People don't get to tell others what to call themselves, but I don't think they do that because they fell for some TERF logic. The idea of things being very simple and black and white, good and bad may be used by TERFs but its also used by groups with basically all and any ideologies, hateful or 'social justice' or anything. And there are people on here and twitter who are very vocal about never saying queer who are trans women and/or very anti TERF, which I imagine could throw you off if someone else is telling you only TERFs don't want people to say queer.) It's a simple story but things are never really that simple. Outside of specific online space things tend to be much less cut and dry.

Also, personally, I've always found queer and what it represents to be kind of a lot to live up to, because I have a massive complex about my own identity not bring good enough for this community. My own particular hang ups are not for me to try and push on others (they suck and I'm glad for people who don't have them!), but when I see people constantly try and get queer over as the perfect identity for confused people in our community, it does rankle a little. It doesn't work for my particular brand of confused and I've found that can be a lonely place to be. I've tried hard in the past to get people to understand, but they usually respond with yet more trying to get queer over. You can end up feeling a bit of a freak after a while!

Anyway, this is a long way of saying I have sympathy for the kids trying hard to say/not say the slurs correctly. The internet is a scary place for after all, it's a place where a post you didn't really think through enough can be seen by thousands of people who all suddenly hate you VERY quickly. A lot of these kids are protecting themselves the best ways they know how. Connecting strongly with real life communities may be a good antidote but as we know,not everyone is in a place where they can do that right now. Ideally we would have online spaces for isolated lgbtq teens and early 20s take place on platforms that DONT tacitly encourage this stuff. I can only hope. The freedom to make mistakes quietly in a post on a long forgotten forum must return!!

#lgbtq discourse #queer discourse #reclaimed slurs discourse #lgbtq+ #online stuff #its a minefield out there on the internet for us all but its easier to avoid the mines when you have more life experience #so look out for the kids even if the things they say sometimes annoy you

[theoccoven]

⇢ [11:40] - GC x KJ

𝙋𝙖𝙞𝙧𝙞𝙣𝙜: Greyson Cox x Kim Jooheon | 𝙂𝙚𝙣𝙧𝙚: Fluff, Slightly Suggestive, Drabble | 𝙒𝙤𝙧𝙙 𝘾𝙤𝙪𝙣𝙩: 807 | 𝘼𝙣𝙤𝙩𝙖𝙩𝙞𝙤𝙣𝙨: Original Work | 𝙒𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨: A little bit of mentions of body issues, some suggestive squeezing here and there

𝙎𝙪𝙢𝙢𝙖𝙧𝙮: Domestic off days are always the best.

𝙋𝙧𝙞𝙚𝙨𝙩𝙚𝙨𝙨 𝙉𝙤𝙩𝙚𝙨: This went from originally being about 300 words to 800...how-.

It was a day off for both Jooheon and Greyson. All shifts were covered at the bookstore so they were taking advantage of the free time by spending it together. Jooheon was laid across the hybrid’s lap. Said man was reading a book while combining his fingers through his lover’s hair. Jooheon nibbled on a square of dark chocolate, his favorite kind that Greyson was so sweet to buy him. The younger was writing up a to-do list for the day, mumbling to himself as he went over it. They were chores that he was going to force Greyson to do with him.

Jooheon loved days like this, he could wear a simple crop top and shorts without anyone judging him or staring. Well other than Greyson of course-. Said man loved these days for the same reason, he loved his boyfriend’s shorts and crop top with just the right amount of skin showing and the right places to grab and hold. The long haired man ran his hand down to Jooheon’s thigh. He gave it a small squeeze before letting it settle there. He whined when a smaller hand swatted him away. His larger hand moved up, placing it on his tummy squeezing there lightly. The same hand swatted it away causing the older to huff, quickly placing his book down and glaring at Jooheon.

“Why are you hitting me?!” Jooheon rolled his eyes at the older getting up to throw away the chocolate wrapper along with getting ready to start chores.

“Because I’m not your squishy toy-.” He yelled from the kitchen, the sound of dishes moving before the sound of the faucet starting fills the small flat. Greyson pouted as he looked over at their shared kitchen with na puppy dog eyes. Jooheon glanced over, giving him a deadpanned look before going to finish with the dishes. When he went back to washing Greyson went back to reading, pouting a little as he read. Joo0heon’s bare feet padded against the floor, Greyson perking up from his book when he heard him coming back. Joo looked him over snorting as he got reminded of a dog excited to see its owner.

The minute he was close enough Greyson instantly went to grab at his sides squeezing them a little. Jooheon went back to swatting his hands away, Greyson groaning and making it his mission to have a hand on his boyfriend’s side. Jooheon shook his head, giving up as he sat down, grabbing his reading glasses, Greyson smiled proudly, hand going to its rightful spot and gently squeezing. “I don’t get why you like them so much.” Jooheon muttered while dividing the chores up for the two of them. “You’re literally squeezing fat. I’m fat.” He said matter of factly while handing the paper to Grey.

Greyson on the other hand looked offended at him. As if he got slapped in the face. “Who told you that?!”Jooheon shrugged, taking his glasses off and stretching.

“Went for a check up and the doctor said I should cut back a bit on what I’m eating. I’m getting a bit overweight.” Greyson scoffed, hugging his middle while throwing his book on the ground and covering his neck with kisses.

“Screw your doctor! I’m not going to stop feeding you. Not when you look so happy.” He smiled hearing Jooheon laugh, going to squeeze at his thighs. “Also these. I’ll miss these.” He grinned, placing more kisses to his neck and shoulders. The younger ravenette rolled his eyes playfully while pushing him away lightly.

“Shut up.” He snorted, getting up and waving at him. “Go do your chores. I’m going to the gym real quick before it gets late.” Greyons looked at him with big eyes following him as he moved.

“Wait really? Without me?” Jooheon nodded slowly, causing Grey to lean forward shaking his head quickly. “No. Not without me.” He quickly got up, stopping when Joo’s hand landed on his chest.

“Is it because of the new gym leggings I got or because you truly don't want me to go alone.” Greyson stopped, blinking to himself for a second before pursuing his lips.

“Well I was thinking I didn’t want to be here alone while people looked at you at the gym…but now…you in those pants… I don’t want to let you go.” Before Jooheon could even say anything or protest Greyson scooped him up and twirled him.

“No gym for you. You go put on those pants and I make you some Char Siu. You get happy food and I get to see you all sexy.~” He beamed while Jooheon snorted and clinged to him.

“Gods you’re lucky I love you.” The younger rolled his eyes while Greyson just beamed happily and brought him in for a soft kiss.

Domestic days were the best days.

⇢ @theoccoven - 𝙖𝙡𝙡 𝙧𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩𝙨 𝙧𝙚𝙨𝙚𝙧𝙫𝙚𝙙, 𝙥𝙡𝙚𝙖𝙨𝙚 𝙙𝙤 𝙣𝙤𝙩 𝙧𝙚𝙥𝙤𝙨𝙚, 𝙚𝙙𝙞𝙩, 𝙥𝙡𝙖𝙜𝙞𝙖𝙧𝙞𝙯𝙚, 𝙚𝙩𝙘. [2024 - 2025]

⇢ Thank you for reading! Since you've made it this far please consider reblogging, commenting or leaving the Priestess an Offering! [Ko-fi]

⇢ 𝙏𝙖𝙜𝙡𝙞𝙨𝙩: @faywithlove, @armysantiny, @kpopadminnie, @iridescentxstars, @monsterhigh-cb [If you want to be added to the taglist send in an ask!]

#🥀high priestess work #writeblr #writing #writblr #writers of tumblr #writeblr community #writers #original writing #fantasy #drabble #fluff #oc #ocs #📓greyson work #📓jooheon work #🖤live a little: supernaturals

[blackroseraven]

Went to the horseplace today. Actually went in early and ended up putting all the horses out, but to be honest it was really nice because like. All the horses were very lazy today. I dunno if just the heat hitting has made them all tired or what but only Vader was any problem and that’s because he ran into the electric wire like a dingus. He jumped around like an idiot, and all of his friends just. Watched.

yep.

Got Quattro out and got to riding and it was really nice. Really, really nice. We jut thumped around the arena lazily. He kept stopping to push his nose through the fence and eat grass. Cantered a little bit but. I wouldn’t even say “in control” I’d just say lazy. Lazy was very much the word of the day.

He kept veering into the middle too, to try and tell me he was done, but. I kept him moving and he got a little more interested when I opened the gate and we went out with Zara and rode down to the field.

I kind of expected him to try and go crazy here but no. He just hung out with Zara and did a few circles. Not super interested in doing much else. We crossed the creek, and on the way back Zara got energy because. I guess she was excited to go back and eat hay and Quattro chugged along with her pretty happily.

We rode a little on the road, too. A car actually passed us pretty close and my brave boy held his ground and kept his pace nicely. Really proud of him for that.

We went down to the barn. Well. Zara was free rein so she decided to. Go behind the big pile of rocks and debris and then she wanted to go over it or something to get back to the barn and partner had to quickly steer her away to avoid them both dying. I dunno, horses are dumb.

I did have to put goop in Q’s ears. The biting bugs are really bad and we have lots of horses with bloody ears, including Q. But the asshole has lost THREE masks now so he gets his ears covered in bug-away stuff, which made him really really mad.

But they all got up on the grass and Q immediately forgot and forgave everything so you know.

It was a good way to start the day.

Now let’s see if I can get anything else done today or everything’s downhill from here.

#horse #quattro #q

[sincerelywhiterose]

Please remember that not everyone is comfortable with the q word. It is still very much a slur in addition to being part of some people's identities. It is possible to respect both- don't call someone that word unless you know they're okay with it, but do feel free to use it for those who rightfully want to. If you're not sure of someone's stance on it, take the time to ask instead of risking disrespect or harm. Both uses of that word are powerful in their own way and that should be respected no matter which side you fall on.

#this is coming from someone who used to id as such and stopped after being targeted with that word #i will call you that if you're okay with it and if you're not i won't use it around you #respecting people on all sides of this is not a one sum game #q word #catch me not putting this in the main tags (yet) because much of the discourse around this is awful #and many refuse to acknowledge that there is a middle ground in this #i'm not in the mood to be called slurs right now (or ever) and i'm posting this because i'm tired of seeing that word everywhere #again it's a great word for many #but i do not id as such and do not want to be called such ever

[technowoah]

Can I request a prompt #37 with Karl Jacobs? I love your writing btw :)

Ring(s)

The four times Karl tried to propose and the one time he actually did.

- Karl Jacobs x gen!neutral reader!

- Prompts: 37) "Are you proposing?!"

⚠︎ swearing, fluff, angst if you squint and a rushed ending. I didn't proofread either

an// TYSM FOR LIKING MY WORK 😭ALSO Thanks for requesting and sorry this came out so late! Hope you enjoy :)

To say that Karl loved you was an understatement. He adored you and practically worshipped the ground you stood on. He is so respectful, which is a major upgrade from your other boyfriends, and loves you for who you are. You didn't have to put on a facadè at all during the 3 years you two have dated.

This love wasn't a one way thing. You loved him just as much, or even more, than he did. Everything he did you supported, you were always cheering him on from wherever you were. You were here for the good and the bad, and he was too. You two never shyed away from admiting your love and support. You could write a essay on each thing you love about Karl.

The idea of marriage came up during a late night dinner at Denny's. The idea came so naturally to you, so it surprised Karl that you didn't tense up. Karl was tense when bringing up the topic of marriage, so when you said "Yeah, I wanna get married to you one day." so casually it caught him off gaurd.

You two had already talked about marriage time and time again, but this time Karl wanted to take the initiative. He was ready to get married and since the marriage talk was just a few months ago it was fresh in his mind. Karl could vividly imagine you walking down the aisle towards him looking angelic. He could see everything now and he wanted those daydreams to become a reality. He wanted to physically feel your hands against his as you two say "I do" to one another.

He couldn't stop thinking about settling down in a nice house with you. Karl already bought a ring for you and always has it with him. Now he justs needs to figure out how to tell you.

1st proposal: Fireworks

"THIS IS THE MOST EXPENSIVE FIREWORK IN THE ENTIRE WORLD-"

You blocked out Jimmy's yelling as you sat in a lawn chair in the middle of the woods. Karl had invited you to a MrBeast video shoot because he thought it would be a great early 4th of July. It was late at night and slightly cool outside, so you were wearing a MrBeast hoodie Karl was wearing earlier. You zoned out as the boys talked to the camera over and over again, taking multiple shots.

You found yourself looking at Karl most of the time you sat there and you always caught his gaze towards you. Every time you caught him looking at you, you sent him a small wave or blow him a kiss and every time he sent a shy wave back or sent a more exaggerated kiss back.

During halfway through the shooting you begrudgingly had to move your lawn chair further and further away from your original spot. Karl always checked up on you before and after each firework set were blown up. He has been acting fidgety around you and you didnt know why. When you tried to confront him about it he would always turn away and go back to the boys without a glance back, and his hands in his pockets.

You loved watching the guys play with so many different types of fireworks, this was a great 4th of July for you, but you wished that Karl was sitting next to you feeling the bliss that you were.

You were currently sitting behind bulletproof glass while the guys had a control panel on their lap. Karl kept sending glances towards you and you looked at him and smiled whishing he was next to you and not over by the guys. You knew it was selfish, but he invited you here.

Karl kept bouncing his leg, he kept his hand in his pocket which held the ring. He kept sending glances towards you, knowing he should be on one knee right about now. Jimmy was about to fire off the last rocket of the night and Karl couldn't seem to go over and ask you to marry him. He knew he was hilding himself back which made him hate himself. You deserved a good night and he hoped you enjoyed the fireworks, but he knew on the ride back he would have to apologize.

He stayed with the boys as they went to go see the fireworks they would be setting off soon. Once they came back they were all about to press the button to set off the expensive fireworks they counted down from 5 and he looked towards you. You were standing up with your arms crossed, hopefully shielding yourself from the cold, and looking towards the fireworks that were going to burst. They finally pressed the button the fireworks went off.

Each burst of light in the air sent a glow onto your smiling face. Karl sent a somber glace and marveled in how the explosion of the fireworks sent a beautiful glow around you.

This wasnt the right time. Next time.

2nd proposal: Donuts

"Im sorry for last night." Karl apologized as you both took a seat at a booth by the window at the small coffee and donut shop.

This was supposed to be an apology for the last failed proposal. Instead of spending time with you, he kept his distance which was the opposite of what he really wanted to do. This was a way to spend much needed time with eachother, but this was also another attempt at a proposal.

Karl wanted to hide the ring in the middle of a donut so when you inevitably look at it when he hands it to you, you'll see the ring and then he'll propose right there. To him it seemed flawless.

You never wanted a huge proposal. You didnt want that much attention on you when your future significant other would propose. Something simple would be the ideal proposal and you've hinted that many times to Karl and right now he was listening. There were only two other couples in the small diner because others were picking up donuts and leaving. If he decided to get down on one knee it would cause a scene.

You stayed silent for a moment looking at Karl before deciding to speak.

"It's no problem. Please dont stress out about it." You smiled softly and he smiled back at you. "I mean the fireworks were beautiful, but you all were screaming too much."

You both laughed as you both recalled that night in the desert.

"Yeah I just didn't..I didn't really talk to you all night. I feel bad." Karl said fiddling with his hands.

"Its in the past Karl. And I still know you love me." You reached out to grab both of his hands and hold his cool hands in yours.

"I do love you." He whispered for only you to hear leaving both of you smiling ear to ear.

"What kind of donuts you want?" Karl asked looking into your eyes carefully.

You thought about it for a while before speaking up. "I'll keep it simple. Icing with sprinkles. Surprise me with the icing color!" You exclaimed while letting go of his hands for a second.

Once you two let go of eachothers hands he immediately went to his pocket and played with the velvet box. He nodded his head and without a word he stood up to meet the cashier behind the display box of donuts. He ordered only one donut as you said with orange icing this time.

He paid for the food and stayed at the counter where he paid. Karl looked back to see if you were paying attention to him only to see you looking out the window at the people passing by. Karl smiled at the sight knowing he really wants to marry you one day and then he looked down at the glistening ring inside of the box.

Karl was supposed to put the ring in the middle of the donut that was laying alone on a napkin on the counter. He started to think of the possibilities of what could happen. What if you didn't see the ring and crumble the ring with the napkin and throw it away? What if you accidentally put the ring in your mouth? What if you weren't hungry anymore?

He looked over again to where you were looking at him giving him the same smile you gave during the fireworks. Karl sighed and once again closed the box with the ring. He was a coward and he knew that.

Karl picked up the donut from the counter and made his way over to you.

"Here's your donut with sprinkles and orange icing!" Karl exclaimed putting emphasis on the 'orange' part.

"Thanks babe!" You smiled as he sat down across from you. "Wait, you didn't get anything for yourself?"

Karl sighed again for what seemed like the 100th time today and put on a smile. "I ended up not being as hungry as I thought I was."

"Well I could always share!" You started to eat your donut as Karl ended up looking outside.

Unbeknownst to you he was thinking of another way to propose without himself getting in his own head.

He'll find a time.

3rd proposal: Livestream

"Chat! As you can see I have my significant other here with me!" Karl exclaimed to his Twitch following.

You were sat next to him in another one of his office chairs with a blanket across your lap. You loved to join Karl's streams, the last couple of time you two played minecraft, gang beats, played on the nitendo switch for a while, but this time he didn't tell you what games you two would be playing. Karl just told you to come over tonight and ended up asking to join him for a stream last minute.

Now you are here next to him as Karl glows with excitement as he streams to his growing followers. You loved how he interacted with his fans and had a genuine connection with them, but sometimes that strong connection can, and has led to some nights where you had to stay the night and comfort him from his inner demons and the internet. Those nights made you love him even more, the vulnerability he gave to you made you comfortable with him.

It seems like the more time you spend eith him the more you want to officially get married. You didn't want to rush him because you soon figured out for yourself that there is no rush to express your love, which you two do everyday day. You two can get eloped in Vegas and you'll be happy, as long as you can spend the rest of your life with the man you love.

Karl kept sending glances towards you throughout the stream hoping you were having fun with the chill, q and a stream. Again he wanted to propose to you tonight during the stream. He loved showing your relationship whenever he could and whenever you would allow him to. His community also loved you the moment you became his significant other, so hopefully this will be a beautiful moment.

You talked to his chat as he contemplated, again, about whether to propose tonight. It wasn't infront of people, it was infront of a screen and it would be on Twitter in less than a week. This would be a good moment, but then again he wanted this moment to be between you two and he couldn't find the right time nor the right "moment".

As the stream continues you ended up wrapping yourself fully in the blanket and lying your head on his shoulder. You both cuddled eachother while you two answered questions. Karl kissed the top of your head and finally collected all of his thoughts.

He didn't need to propose to officially claim his love to you. Karl knew you both loved eachother to the ends of the Earth and back. There's no need for ceremony and the one day he will propose, he know it will come naturally. There is no need to force it, and now he wont.

Only time will tell.

4th proposal: spongebob

"Are you ready, kids?

Aye, aye, Captain!

I can't hear you!

Aye, aye, captain!

Oh!"

The TV illuminated the comfortable, dark room you two were in. You were lying on the couch with Karl with the blanket you had while streaming. It was late at night after the stream and you two ended up watching re-runs of spongebob. Karl sang along to the theme song softly while you hummed along. This was the 4th episode you both watched this night and it was a great way to end the week.

"Do you want to stay over tonight?" Karl asked softly with tiredness in his voice.

"Of couse. Im too tired to move, so thanks for offering." You chuckled.

"You're welcome here anytime." Karl yawned and squeezed your sides. "Do you want popcorn?"

"Hell yeah." You got off of Karl as he walked to the kitchen.

He put the bag into the microwave and leaned back onto the kitchen counter as he waited. Karl looked over to the side and saw a empty vase which was next to the velvet box he was carrying with him this whole week. He shook his head and laughed to himself before getting the popcorn out of the microwave, dumping it in a bowl and walking back to see you taking up the whole couch.

"Move over or I'll sit on you." Karl said standing above her.

"Is that a promise?" You teased.

"Okay then!" He turned around and began to slowly and dramatically fake sitting ontop of you.

You began to laugh and try to push him off of you. You successfully got him to sit down and returned to your previous position, but this time with popcorn.

"I love you, you know that?" You hummed into his chest.

"Yeah, and I love you more."

"I love you most."

"I love you mostest." Karl laughed.

"That's not a word." You smiled.

"I love you so much I made up a word for ya." Karl kissed you head and you hugged him tighter.

"You know what?" Karl chuckled. "I love you so much that I tried to propose to you 3 times this week."

Karl finished and you sat up from your spot looking surprised. Karl sat up as well thinking he made a mistake telling you. He was abkut to apologize, but you beat him to speak.

"Oh my gosh!" You exhaled.

"Look, I'm sorr-"

"Are you proposing?!" You exclaimed with a smile on your face.

"Huh-?"

Karl was surprised just like you were before. He remembered that he wanted the Maybe this was the moment he needed this week.

Karl grabbed both of your hands and caressed them both, looking into your eyes. "I was planning to all week. But now I think this is a good moment. So Y/N? Will you marry me?"

"Of course I will!" You enveloped him into a tight hug and peppered his face with kisses. He finally found his moment and he couldn't be happier.

"You said you tried to propose three other times?" You questioned. "When was that?"

"Its a long story."

#mcyt blurb #mcyt angst #mcyt fluff #mcyt x reader #mcyt headcanons #dream smp x reader #dream x reader #karl jacobs headcanons #karl jacobs angst #karl jacobs blurb #karl jacobs #karl jacobs x reader #karl jacobs x you #karl jacobs x y/n #mcyt imagines #mcyt fanfiction #mcyt x you #mcyt x y/n #mcyt writing #mcyt writer #karl jacobs imagine #mcyt requests #mcyt reactions #mcyt reader insert

[watchmegetobsessed]

A STEP FURTHER

Sequel to SIT ON ME

a/n: as per requested, here is a part two to my recent sebastian fic! hope you guys will like it as much as you did the previous part! also, there’s not gonna be any more parts!

pairing: Sebastian Stan X Assistant!Reader

word count: 3k

masterlist

You were expecting it. You knew how the internet and most importantly, Sebastian’s fans work. Just hours after the event, dozens of videos got out of Sebastian saying that he wanted you to sit on him if he was a chair, an answer to a highly inappropriate question that shouldn’t have been asked in the first place, but your crazy ass boss thought otherwise.

It washed over the whole fandom and soon enough everyone was talking about the two of you. And because part of your job is to be up to date about Sebastian’s media presence, you had to face not just him but yourself all over the internet. Fans started to dig up every tiny interaction between the two of you caught on camera, they posted photo montages of you and him just out and about or going from one meeting to the other. They started to look for signs that you’re dating and half of the fandom became convinced that you’re in a secret relationship. Speculations and rumors spread faster than wildfire and there was no way to stop it, you just had to live with it.

In the meanwhile, Sebastian didn’t seem to be bothered by it at all. It’s like he didn’t even acknowledge the fuss about the two of you, like it was all so natural and normal to be seen as a couple by the whole world when you were just his employee.

“What? It’s not like I ever addressed anything about my dating life,” he shrugged one day when you asked him why he is not caring about the situation at all. And that was pretty much it.

The fans wouldn’t have been that big of a deal to you either. They are strangers, they always get fixated on something and soon enough you knew something new would come up and make them forget about your existence. The people close to you on the other hand are a whole different side of the story.

Following the event, Mackie wouldn’t shut up about Sebastian being hopelessly in love with you and he would nag you to go on a date already, getting on your nerves even more than he usually does with his nosiness. You love the man, you really do, but he needs to learn how to stay in his own lane.

And then, slowly but surely every friend you and Sebastian shared caught up on the story and they started asking you about it again and again and you had to tell them the same thing every damn time: you and Sebastian were working together, no romance was involved between the two of you.

No one believed you.

Now it’s been weeks and people still go crazy whenever you and Seb step out together, which happens quite often since he’s been having a busy month work-wise. Paparazzi are always following you around, catching every moment you spend out in the public, putting you on the tabloids nonstop. It’s become your usual.

Another day, another event. The day starts early for you before you pick Sebastian up and heading out to have breakfast before you are supposed to show up at the concert hall that’s going to be the venue of today’s interview and Q&A.

“Mackie has been blowing my phone up all morning,” you grumble upon seeing another text from said man before you just turn your phone screen facing down so you can finish your toast in peace.

“What does he want?” Sebastian hums.

“He is asking if I’m coming today, as if I missed any events these past weeks,” you huff shaking your head.

“He has been acting weird,” Sebastian grimaces, reaching for his coffee. “Weirder than his usual,” he adds.

“What do you mean?”

“I don’t know, he just asks weird stuff,” he shrugs, not paying much attention to it and you decide to do the same.

Not much later, you’re finished with your food, only sipping on your coffee when you spot a group of girls near your table, their phones pointing in your direction and you have to stop yourself from growling, turning a little so you’re not facing the phones entirely. Sebastian notices your discomfort and looking around he spots the girls as well before turning back to face you. He doesn’t say a word, just gets up from his seat and strides over to the group as you watch him with wide eyes.

“Hi girls, can I ask you to delete the pictures you took, please? I’m happy to take selfies with you, just please don’t post the ones of us eating, okay?” you hear him ask them, leaving you completely speechless. Luckily, the girls are happy to obligate and he quickly poses for pictures with all of them before joining you back at the table.

“Why did you do that?” you ask him, eyebrows raised in surprise.

“You clearly didn’t like that they took pictures of us and I know you don’t like how we are being talked about recently, so I thought I would… try to help about that a little,” he shrugs, finishing the rest of his coffee.

“I just don’t like that everyone is in our business,” you sigh, folding your arms on your chest as you lean back in your seat.

“So we have business? Together?” he asks, raising his eyebrows at you over the table.

“That’s not how I… We talked about this, Seb,” you breathe out, your shoulders falling forward.

“Ages ago. Things might have changed since then,” he suggests shrugging his shoulder.

“I still work for you,” you point it out. “Things are better this way.”

“Sure, whatever you say,” he mumbles, clearly hurt by your words, but there’s not much you can do against it. “Let’s go, I don’t want Mackie to be up in my ass for being late,” he sighs, leaving the money on the table that most likely covers both your meals and a fat tip as well.

The car ride to the venue is silent, but not in the comfortable way it sometimes is. It’s awkward and you keep glancing at him, trying to find the right words but you’re not even sure what you want to tell him.

I’m sorry we work together so we can’t date? I’m sorry I keep rejecting you? I’m sorry I’m afraid if we go any further than this it will ruin our friendship?

You have absolutely no idea how to deal with it, so you just stay silent, right until you arrive to the venue. Before Seb could get out of the car you speak up.

“Are you mad at me now?” you ask, biting into your bottom lip.

“I’m not mad, Y/N. I don’t think I could ever be mad at you,” he truthfully answers, his eyes only falling on you after he has spoken.

“But there’s something, I can tell.”

“I’m just a little frustrated, is all.”

“Because of what people say about us?” you make a guess.

“Because there’s this unsaid situation between us and you just don’t let me address it. You don’t want to talk about it and whenever it’s brought up, you just shut the door right at my face,” he explains and with each spoken word, you feel worse and worse.

“It’s a complicated situation,” you breathe out.

“It’s not,” he retorts. “Do you not like me?”

“Of course I like you!”

“Okay, I like you too so why can’t we be more than just friends?”

“Because we are not just friends. I’m working for you, it’s a different situation!”

“Y/N, this is not an office job, there’s no HR, no policies, we can do whatever we want!” he chuckles bitterly as you keep your eyes down. You don’t have the heart to tell him that it’s not just because of work, but because you’re terribly afraid of being a disappointment to him if you eventually give it a try.

Your silence doesn’t amuses Sebastian and you don’t have time to rave any longer about the situation.

“Forget it, sorry I brought it up again. Let’s just… get over with this thing,” he mumbles before getting out of the car.

You move around each other like strangers, he is clearly avoiding to even look at you and you’re feeling guilty even though you don’t think you have a reason to. Still, you hate seeing him this upset, especially when it’s because of you.

The change in your act is not that evident, but Mackie immediately notices it. When you walk past him he grabs your wrist and pulls you aside.

“What the hell is going on?” he asks with wide, curious eyes.

“What are you talking about?” you retort, acting innocent, but there’s a reason why you didn’t become an actress, you suck at even lying.

“You and Seb are acting like a divorcing couple!” he whisper-yells. Pursing your lip you start chewing on the inside of your cheek as you nervously tap your foot on the ground.

“We just… had a little disagreement.”

“About what?”

“Us,” you breathe out, your head hanging low.

“Wait, so there is an ‘us’?” he asks, air-quoting the last word and you roll your eyes at him.

“No, that’s what the disagreement was about. He wants and I…”

“Don’t tell me you don’t, because I know that’s bullshit. Y/N, I see the way you look at that man, why are you making it so hard for the both of you?”

“It’s just—It might ruin everything and I can’t afford that right now.”

“Ruin everything?!” he grimaces. “What would it ruin?”

“I said fucking everything!” you snap at him, losing your patience that you’re the only one who has issues with the situation. “Our friendship, my job, everything! And I don’t want that. I can’t have that.”

“Dating someone wouldn’t ruin the friendship, Y/N. This is not middle school. Friendship is part of being with someone and you two have that. Just let it take a step further.”

“Thanks for the advice, but I’m good. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have stuff to do,” you mumble under your breath before walking away from him before he could get another word out.

It’s not that you don’t want it, because you do, you really do. You’ve been in love with the man for a long time and knowing that he has feelings for you too makes you have a heart attack every time you think about it. But you are so afraid it might go south and then you’ll end up losing your job and one of your closest friends as well. Because above everything Sebastian grew to be your biggest confidant, the person you turn to whenever you are feeling down, when you need a shoulder to cry on, you can’t imagine your life without him anymore and it’s not just about the times when you’re working. Traveling around the world with him is a blessing, you love the little moments you share, the late night movie nights in hotel rooms or when you’re exploring a new city together. You love messing around in his trailer when he is filming, making silly videos on sets or playing around with props you shouldn’t even touch. You can share anything with him and vice versa. If you lose him for whatever reason, you would be left with a hole in your life that would just simply never disappear, because no one will ever be like him and that’s a fact. You’re terribly afraid to risk everything for something that might not even work. You might be a horrible item, romance can bring out things of people that haven’t shown before.

The guys finally get on stage and you watch them from the side as always. It goes as usual, they are joking around, making a show, entertaining the audience as they go over the interview before the question round starts. You don’t realize it at first, but you’re holding your breath as one question follows the other, you’re scared someone might ask Sebastian about you and the shit show would blow up again. You can only hope his answer wouldn’t be as stupid as it was before. But luckily, the audience keeps you out of their business, only focusing on what’s important, so you start to feel relieved. Right until the whole event is nearing its end and Mackie decides to take matters into his own hands.

“I think we have time for one more question,” the interviewer announces and dozens of hands shoot up into the air, desperate to get the chance to ask the men on stage, but before anyone could get the mic, Mackie speaks up.

“Actually, can I have that last question?” he chimes in holding up a finger.

“Uh, sure, go ahead!” the interviewer responds, clearly a little puzzled about his request. Mackie then turns to face Sebastian who is sitting on his right and just by the look on his face you already know what it’s gonna be about.

“Sebastian, my question is: What do you love most about Y/N?”

He can barely finish the question, the crowd erupts in cheers and whistles that he had the guts to ask him about you, but you’re feeling different about his ballsy move.

“Mackie! No!” you shout from the side, both men looking your way. Mackie tries to look innocent while Sebastian’s face is unreadable, his piercing blue eyes are just staring right back at you and you wish you could read his mind.

“Alright, I take back the ques—“ Mackie starts in a mumble, but Sebastian is quick to cut him off.

“Nah, I’ll answer,” he simply says, another round of cheering filling the place and you accept defeat.

Squatting down you hug your knees to your chest as you listen to the inevitable answer Sebastian is about to give.

“What I love the most about Y/N is that she is genuinely the best person anyone could ever have in their life. She is so selfless and caring towards others, always got her friends’ back no matter what. I love that we aren’t just simply working together but we are friends too, really good ones and that I know nothing can change that.”

Listening to his soothing voice through the speakers, you feel your throat closing up, especially at the last part he just said. Chewing on your bottom lip you tilt your head to the side as he continues.

“Literally anything can happen, we could have the worst fight ever and I still know that we would make up no matter what. She is… just an amazing and exceptional person.”

There’s a heavy moment of silence and you’re staring at him from afar with teary eyes as his eyes are glued to his hands in his lap.

“Damn,” Mackie breathes out, making everyone laugh and Sebastian’s gaze rises to him with a small smile on his lips.

There’s no time to dwell on his answer, the event needs to end. The interviewer thanks for their time and as the crowd cheers to them they head off the stage, waving at them until they disappear.

You’ve moved to the corner of the room, not wanting to be in the way, but you’re still not over the speech Sebastian just gave about you. As he appears from the stage his eyes are clearly scanning the room, searching for someone and when he finally spots you, his face hardens as he heads in your way. You’re standing with your hand covering your lips, eyes still slightly watered and seeing you like this he knots his eyebrows together in worry.

“Hey, what’s—“

“Did you mean that?” you breathe out, your voice trembling. “Did you mean it that nothing can change that?”

“Of course,” he nods, finally seeing what this is all about. “We’ve always found our way back to each other, haven’t we?”

“But dating is so much different than what we do now!” you breathe out, still not entirely sure it’s what you should do.

“Why would it be?” he chuckles softly. “We are already spending the majority of our time together, we know each other better than some couples, it wouldn’t be that big of a change, Y/N. And just like how it could ruin things between us, not taking the step could do the same, because sooner or later it’s gonna be unbearable, one of us might end up dating someone else and that wouldn’t do good to us for sure. I would rather accept the end of it knowing that we gave us a try than not even trying.”

“What if I turn out to be a completely shitty girlfriend?” you ask in a whisper as he steps closer, his hands finding your wrists as he pulls them away from your face, holding them gently. “W-What if I—“

“Shut up,” he cuts you off chuckling. “There’s no chance you are shitty at anything,” he replies teasingly, making you smile the slightest. “But even if you do end up being one, we’ll work on it together.”

His hands guide your hands around his waist, you hold onto his shirt as he cups your face in his hands, his face inching closer until his nose is brushing against yours.

“I really hope you’re right,” you breathe out, giving up to resist it any longer. There’s no use.

“Was I ever not right?” he asks smugly.

“Oh remember when—“

You don’t get to finish, because he silences you the best way possible, his lips smashing onto yours. It’s been long due and it doesn’t disappoint, his lips feel soft and perfect against yours, you can’t help but let out a pleased hum as your hands slide up his toned chest and your arms curl around his neck while his hands find your waist strong arms circling your waist as he pulls you tight against him.

“That’s what I’m talking about!” Mackie’s voice breaks the moment and as you both pull back and turn in his direction, you see him pump his fist into the air with a victorious smirk on his face.

“Mind your own business, Mackie!” Seb calls out to him as you bury your face in the crook of his neck giggling like a little school girl.

“It’s my business! I made it happen!” Mackie retorts and a laugh rumbles through Seb’s chest.

“I’ll send you a thank you gift card later!” he shouts back before turning to you again, kissing the side of your head.

Thank you for reading, please like and reblog if you enjoyed it!

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