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notmuchtofind · 6 months

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public eye pt2 | d.s

tw: low appetite, possible miscarriage, cheating

pt 1 here

a/n: it’s finally out lol!! tysm for the interaction on the past fic🥹 i hope you enjoy! lmk your thoughts x

"drew if it's not what you want and it's what I eventually want, are we even right for each other? What are we doing? You don't care for me like you usto, you're not the same. you're a dick" you say trying not to shout

"I don't know what I want right now?" Drew states, not looking you in the eyes.

How's he being so calm? Why is he doing this? This is not like drew.

"fuck you." You stand up out of the chair and walk right out of the cafe doors, tears start streaming down your face and you try to hide your face with the palm of your hand...

*snap* followed by a flicker

*snap* *snap*

fuck.

you look around...

"Is that paparazzi?" you mumble to yourself

you walk faster to your car, quickly opening the door and throwing your bag on the backseat, you fumble to turn the engine on and see slight flickers through the rearview mirror...this is the last thing you need right now.

_________________________

After setting your keys aside on the kitchen table and kicking your shoes off, you immediately undressed out of the clothes you had picked out to see Drew in and chucked on your dressing. spending the rest of that day on the couch. Tears would brim in your eyes, often spilling over through the course of the day as you'd replay what had been said by drew in your mind. And there was no text from him. no apology, no checking up on you, no nothing...maybe this was really over? It seemed to all happen so quickly. How could you go from, what people knew as the 'IT' couple, to being, well...nothing.

Passed out on the couch, you are awoken by the pinging of notifications coming from your phone. In a dazed state your initial thought is that Drews trying to get hold of you. Your hand fumbles around the couch as you follow the sound trying to relocate the phone. You pick it up, eyes half wide, and check the time. 4:07am.

"fuck" you mumble too yourself, you've been on this couch for nearly 12 hours...

As your eyes wander down from the timestamp at the top of your phone screen, you lock your gaze onto the first notification.

Twitter : @drewobxlover03 Tagged you in a post.

'okay, pretty normal?' you think to yourself

but as your sleepy eyes drift down some more...

6,789 more.

You quickly adjust your position on the couch, now sitting up as your back leans against the arm of it... your gaze widens.

Too caught up in your own trail of thoughts and distress when you entered your home earlier, The flickers from the paparazzi camera didn't even cross your mind. You were used to it to say the least, but you'd forgotten the difference in what they may have captured earlier on...

Your finger glides over the notifications and swipes to open.

You're met with a picture grid.

A "slideshow" full of your swollen teary face. Drews hands flailing around at you through the cafe windows. your figure towering over drew as you got up out of your seat. You abruptly dash out of the cafe doors...

The number on your twitter activity heading just keeps rising... and rising.

A pit in your stomach starts to grow, but You can't help but click on more, its a bad idea...

Met by more photos of you from different angles, red streaks from tears that have trailed down your cheeks. Feelings of embarrassment overcome your being.

until the embarrassment turns into dismay.

Your palm meets your mouth, shocked by the images on your phone screen, you're breathed.

They're in a car...pictures of him, and her... touching her face?...They're laughing? they’re way too close for your liking.

your heart begins swelling with hurt, you feel a physical pain ache within your chest, thoughts that it may almost rupture.

You scan the comments, your thumb appears to be scrolling too fast for your eyes to catch up.

@user0844628495: OMFG HE DIDN'T TT!!???

@Chaseforeverxoxo: I never liked y/n anyways lol.

@obxstufffff: Who is she???

@starkeyandy/l/n20: no no no no!!! please, I don't believe in true love fr :((((((

@user984763097: I hate men.

You should've known from the moment Drew was being distant after he started shooting for the new film that there was something off, that he'd possibly found another girl. it just never seemed to cross your mind. Not your drew? Not after nearly 4 years and especially not after you guys were so public with your relationship.

Maybe it lingered in your subconscious...but your heart was too heavy to allow yourself to slip that possibility to the front of your mind. You feel like a fool.

The only person who knew you and drew just as equally was Madelyne. After phoning her up and apologising for how late it was, you explained the situation. she offered to come round and comfort you, and you allowed her to do just that, as you sobbed into her arms she was wiping your tears. She didn't say much, she just held you...the truth is there's not much she could say...at least not to you anyways. But she promised the next time she and Drew would come into contact it would not end well, and she was adamant that it would be the last time she would willingly be in the same room as him. Even though you met Madelyn through drew, you and her hit it off so quickly, it's like you found your platonic soulmate as well as your romantic one...or so you had thought.

~~~~~~~

Madelyn was passed out on the opposite side of the couch when you decided to get up and get some water, your appetite was certainly not present but you figured you should hydrate yourself, your tears had drained your body from water. You glance over to the kitchen as you make your way there. The time reads 8am on the digital clock within the microwave.

As you drag your feet around the kitchen, collecting a glass to fill with water, your ears prick up to the sound of a knock at your door. Confused, you slowly redirect your journey and turn to the front door. You peak through the peephole, to find the boy you've been in hysterics over for the past, well...however many hours.

He knocks again, this time a little louder.

Your mind starts racing, your heart begins to pound and you get that ever so familiar feeling of anxiety that rushes over you.

You shake your head in distress and you battle with your thoughts on what to do next...

"y/n...please, open the door... I know you're not asleep"

He's right, he knows you well enough to know your mind wouldn't allow you to sleep for more than a couple hours at a time when you're feeling upset.

You glance over to the couch where Madelyn still lays, her breaths slow and fall steadily.

You step a little closer to the door frame and lean your weight onto one side. "um, Drew...I-I really don't feel like speaking right now"

"please y/n, just open the door, let me explain myself... I- i've been shit I know and ...i'm sorry, can you just hear me out?" Drew utters through slight cracks in his voice.

Tears brim in your eyes as you listen through the door to the words that trail out of Drews mouth...you tilt your head back and gasp for air as you try and hold back your wave of emotions. You want to see him, you want to talk, but you feel like you're almost stuck, unable to think straight, you're not ready for the emotional baggage that a conversation like this would bring right now. You figure there's no real explanation on why Drew has treated you the way he has for the past couple of months, and no excuse for acting the way he had in the photos you'd seen, it all hurt you, and it was valid.

Your brain is scattered trying to figure out the right way to go about all of this...but almost before your mind could tell you no, your hand reaches for the hinges to unlock the front door.

your eyes lock together, and you can see Drews been crying, they're bloodshot and his eyebags slightly swollen. You look down at your feet as you quietly step outside the front door and into the apartment block hallway. "i've got to come out here, Madelyn's asleep..." you whisper slightly. Drew nods sheepishly.

as you close the door and shuffle your feet in front of Drew, you look up to him and fold your arms. "so?...you wanted to talk to me what do you want you want to say?" you question

"I just wanted to say i'm sorry, that I never meant to hurt you, you were right, I have been a dick, i've been scared and stressed and i've made some stupid decision I-"

"did you sleep with her?" you interrupt, you couldn’t truly hear drew out until you got off what was on your mind, you just needed to know first.

"huh?" He questions, his eyebrows burrowing slightly

"Did you sleep with her?" you utter through a passive tone

" I-what do you mean ?"

"Ive seen the fucking photos Joseph! did you. sleep. with her?" you exclaim, hands gesturing to emphasise your emotions.

"What? What photos y/n? I- I don't know what youre talking about?"

your heart skips a beat

The truth is, Drew hadn't looked on twitter, Drew hadn't seen the photos of you, or him, or her. He always kept his phone on do not disturb between the night and early morning. And when the realisation hits...you can't help but snap.

A small chuckle slips through your lips. "are you fucking kidding me drew?"` you spit " you really was going to come here, apologies and not be truthful about what happened last night, do you think im fucking stupid? look at your fucking phone!?"

But before Drew can get out his phone to check what youre talking about, you get out your own, shoving the image of him and another girl into his face. "this?" you state through gritted teeth.

Drews expression changes, his brows drop.

"anything to say? maybe the reason youve been such a dick is because youre fucking your co star huh?"

but before you could ask him once more, you notice his attention isn’t on you, but is drawn towards the floor

As you look down towards your bare legs, you notice drops of blood beginning to fall from in between, first slowly…then all at once.

cramping begins in your lower abdomen, however, it doesn't feel familiar, it feels uneasy…you begin to panic, facing drew with your hand now clamped over your mouth…

“what the fuck y/n, we- we have to get you to a hospital…”

a/n: pt3??????

@winterrrnight @loves0phelia @f4ll-for-you @leyla-1905 @dilvcv @abarleyexistentbeing @tringeorge @emmsyysstuff @missamericanablog @deadxrx @clearpoetryobservation-blog @hotch-meeeeeuppppp @emotionsmgcbabe @aliciacat20

#drew starkey #drew starkey x reader #fanfic #rafe cameron #rafe cameron x you #rafe x reader #the other zoey #fluff #obx #rafe cameron fluff #angst drew #drew starkey angst #drew starkey x y/n #rafe obx #obx imagine #drew starkey obx

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queen-of-reptiles · 5 months

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𝚂𝚆𝙰𝙽

description: in which katie mccabe's girlfriend is on her final run of Swan Lake as Odette, and sometimes all you need is a bit of love to help say goodbye.

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katie mccabe x female reader

disclaimer: this is all a work of fiction - she never dated Rue and Caitlin in this :)

warnings: Nothing too bad, a little saucy and slightly sexual comments.

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y/n just posted

liked by katie_mccabe11, leahwilliamsonn and 98, 211

tagged birminghamroyalballett

y/n:

From Birmingham to Salford, to Sunderland to Edinburgh, to Plymouth and now back to Edinburgh to say goodbye.

This last year has been nothing short of breath-taking and a dream. To the cast who have been fantastic, thank you, I have made some lifelong friends.

To my dance teachers and directors, you gave a little nobody the chance to be her dream and I cannot be more grateful to you for that.

And finally, Odette, thank you for your have turned me into the princess a young girl once dreamed of being.

The best of luck to all those continuing, and onto the next journey.

love,

y/n xx

view 1098 comments...

ceasermorales: You are so fantastic! I will miss you very much, my odette! 🤍

y/n: My prince 🤍🖤

username1: I am such a big fan, you have been the best Odette we have ever seen! 😭❤️❤️

Username2: OMG i follow you on TikTok! I love you!

katie_mccabe11: beautiful as always! <3

username3: uhhhhh Katie? What you doing here?

username4: omg is Katie lurking??? 😭

username5: well ig Katie has never publicly dated anyone???

username3: no please Katie cannot be taken!! 😫😫😫

username6: bitch you're delusional, let Katie date people, she's not yours just cause she has never talked about her love life!!!

username7: THE WHOLE ARSENAL TEAM HAVE LIKED THIS!! 😱😱

yaoqinshang: It has been nothing short of an honour understudying you - thank you for all you taught me - I will miss you!

y/n: Knock them dead kiddo - love you xx

rosannaely: Gonna miss you !

y/n: Going to miss ya too xoxo

isabellahoward: gonna blow their minds out there !! xx

username8: omg what is she doing??

y/n: xoxo

see more comments...

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katie_mccabe11 just posted on her story

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Twitter/X

username1: Has anyone seen Katie's story????

username2: WHO IS THIS GIRL ON KATIE'S STORY?

username3: Her name is y/n! This is her @ - @y/n - she is ballet dancer ! She just finished her run as Odette in the Royal Birmingham Ballet.

username4: omg i watched her dance last month she was sooo good!! 🥺

username5: SHE IS SO PRETTY AS WELL

username6: she's quite big on Tiktok also thank you for finding her!

username7: Katie having a potential new gf who is A BALLET DANCER of all things is insane!!!!

username8: She is also a ballroom dancer! my friend took a few masterclasses off of her and said she is like the sweetest thing!

username9: sunshine x stormcloud OMGOMG OMG cute!! 🥺❤️❤️

username10: they could just be friends though?

see more tweets...

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katie_mccabe11 just posted

liked by, leahwilliamsonn, arsenalwfc, and 129, 388 others

katie_mccabe11 how does she do this? 😶

view all 3298 comments

username1: omg omg its her!

username2: IS THIS CONFIRMATION? 🧐🧐

username3: cool katie, cool.

username4: NOOO why would she be with her??

username5: she ain't even that pretty wtf??

leahwilliamsonn: I don't understand how much talent can be in one little body? Like how does she do it?

katie_mccabe11: I think she's a witch honestly

bethmead_: well, we alllll know who she's put a spell on if that's the case...

leahwilliamsonn: 🫣🫣

caitlinfoord: do you think she could teach me?

y/n: I would gladly! 😘

katie_mccabe: no, we need Caitlin to be actually able to play, not broken.

y/n: aw 🙁

cailtinfoord: aw 🙁

jade_mc7: she's so cool - so much cooler than Katie!

laurynmccabe15: agreed

c_mccabe11: agreed

_deanmccabe: agreed

katie_mccabe11: OI little shites 😠

arsenalwfc: we agree too Mccabe clan.

username6: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

see more comments…

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y/n just posted

liked by, katie_mccabe11, caitlinfoord and 298, 356 others

tagged katie_mccabe11, caitlinfoord, leahwilliamsonn, bethmead_ and 4 others

y/n what a fun day :)

view 2126 comments

username1: SHE’S HANGING OUT WITH THE ARSENAL GIRLIES??

username2: SHE AND KATIE HAVE TO BE DATING?

username3: the way Katie is looking at her behind the camera 😩

leahwilliamsonn: I still don’t get how you go up on your toes 🤨

caitlinfoord: I never want to learn, trying was enough 😭

bethmead_: you mean face planting was enough …

kyracooneyx: I think i could do ballet full time 😁😁

y/n: deffo, career change in the works 😘

katie_mccabe11: that photo of me ?? 🙄

y/n: don’t i love it !!

username4: 🧐🤨

viviannemeidema: 🩷

y/n: 🩷

isabellahoward: CAN I COME NEXT TIME??

y/n: YES OMG 🖤

see more comments…

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katie_mccabe11 just posted

liked by, y/n, leahwilliamsonn, and 321, 838 others

tagged y/n

katie_mccabe11 happy three years love - lucky to have ya to keep me calm <3

comments disabled

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y/n just posted

liked by arsenalwfc, bethmead_ and 211, 983 others

tagged katie_mccabe11

y/n three fantastic years with you, I cannot explain how much i love you and how grateful I am to have had you in my life.

I’m so glad you knocked me down in that park all those years ago, because it has led to the best thing in my life <3

Too many more my love xxx

comments disabled

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twitter/ X

username1: 3 YEARS??

username2: WE DIDNT KNOW FOR THREE YEARS???

username3: HOW? three entire fucking years

username4: i want more content of them now

username5: HARD LAUNCH KATIE

username6: I’m so confused with this relationship 😭😭

username7: THEY ARE SO CUTE #y/nmccabe

username8: HOW HAS THE ENTIRE ARSENAL CLAN KEPT THIS QUIET

arsenalwfc: IT WAS HARD!

see more tweets…

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y/n sighed as her phone blew up yet again, her notifications going insane on the bench next to her as she watched her girlfriend train.

Jonas was shouting football instructions y/n vaguely recognised from the sidelines as the training session drew to a close.

y/n was lucky, Jonas was fine with her in the training sessions having been with Katie so long, the team loving her and the fact a lo of the training staff's children had private dance lessons with y/n.

As the session slowly drew to a close, y/n left her phone blowing up on the bench as she went around and helped with picking up the cones.

She found herself at the training centre more often recently, finding it boring being at home while she waited for the announcement of her new job, the BBC still keeping it quiet.

As y/n bent down and grabbed another cone, two familiar hands placed themselves on her hips and as she stood back up she was pulled back into a chest.

"Alright, twinkle toes?" Leah asked with a mock Irish accent, y/n laughed as Katie's head popped up at the sound of her, the Irish woman rolling her eyes at her teammate who had her arms around her girl.

"Oi, Williamson, hands off!" Katie yelled, leaving Caitlin and Alessia who rolled their eyes as the Irish woman chased down the currently benched blonde captain.

Katie's hands pushed Leah from y/n, the blonde stumbling as Katie wrapped her arms around her lover, pressing a long kiss to her lips as y/n squeaked and turned to face Leah worriedly.

"Katie careful with her!" The dancer chided her girlfriend who rolled her eyes as Leah pouted, leaning into the natural worry the dancer had for her.

"Yeah Katie, careful with me." Leah mocked and the Irish woman scoffed.

"No." Katie chided as y/n tried to move from her arms.

"I wanna help." The dancer whined at her girlfriend. Katie just shrugged and kissed her again, Leah groaning in disgust as she walked off, wanting to go bother someone else.

"Y/n! Your phone's going mental!" Kyra calls from across the pitch, y/n pulls away from the worryingly addictive lips of her girlfriend and looked toward the young girl.

"Yeah, I know darling, just leave it." y/n called, Kyra grinning at her as she followed the rest of her team inside, leaving the two lovers alone on the pitch.

"Social media still going mad over us?" Katie asks her worriedly, her slightly clammy hand coming up to cup her love's cheek as she nodded.

"Yeah, but it will die down eventually." The girl said unbothered.

"You sure you are still okay with us going public?" Katie asks and the dancer giggled.

"Too late to take it back now Katie-bear." She smiled, Katie hushing her use of the nickname which melted her heart.

"Shh, if the girls heard that nickname I would never heard the end of it." Katie tells her and the dancer in her arms laughed, Katie's hands squeezing her waist tighter at the sound which made her heart light.

"Oh yeah, you have to keep up that big bad wolf persona." y/n mocked with a giggle, Katie looking at her offended.

"Excuse me, I am a big bad wolf." Katie defended.

"In your dreams lovie." y/n laughed, but she screeched when Katie threw her over her shoulder, Katie's strong hands holding tight to her thighs as she began to spin in circles.

"Ready to say sorry?" Katie asked, her grin wide at the sound of her lover's giggles.

"Okay, okay I'm sorry." She called, which caused Katie to place her back on her feet, the Irish woman's hands coming to rest on her hips to steady the dizzy girl, who hadn't been able to spot on a place while being spun.

The dancer giggled again and Katie couldn't help but cup her face and pull her in for a kiss, their lips meeting and Katie quickly deepening the kiss.

Katie's arms moved back down to grip the hips of her lover, pulling her closer to her body, y/n's small arms wrapping around Katie's neck, holding tight as she pulled herself up and closer.

Katie's tongue infected her mouth, claiming her as she squeezed her tighter to her body, both of them too caught up in the deep kiss to hear Leah coming to look for them.

"Oh come on!" Leah huffed. "Take a breath!" She yelled at them, Katie rolls her eyes as her hand slips down and squeezes her girlfriend's ass to annoy the blonde who gagged from afar.

y/n pulled away giggling, as Katie squeezed once more before letting her go, the Irish woman grabbing her hand as they walked toward Leah, the blonde holding the dancer's phone in her hand.

"You two are sickening." Leah says, a thump echoing her statement causing Leah to whine, and cling to the dancer who instantly comforted her.

"Katie!"

"What?"

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y/n just posted on her story

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END

hope you enjoyed the added little fic xoxo

hope this is what you wanted @lionesses-lions xxxx

I will probably make a part 2 honestly. :)

Queenie xx

#katiemccabe #katiemccabe imagine #katie mccabe x y/n #katiemccabe x reader #social media woso #woso #woso imagines #woso community #woso soccer #woso x y/n #woso x reader #woso fanfics

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oomisluvr · 9 months

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“We should get married.”

Japan is unusually hot this time of year, the humidity weighing heavy in your lungs. The cicadas sing their love for the warmer weather, celebrating a seemingly endless summer.

You watch the busy intersection from Kiyoomi’s highrise balcony, idly watching the streetlights conduct the flow of traffic.

Green, green, yellow.

Yellow, green, red.

Red, red, red.

You snort, “What makes you say that?”

Kiyoomi takes a long drag from a cigarette, inhaling deeply then releasing the breath in a plume of smoke. It’s a nasty habit he picked up from watching his eldest brother, a habit he rarely lets himself indulge in due to his lifestyle.

He only does it when he’s anxious. Jittery. Nervous. He only does it when he absolutely needs to.

Lots of people think he’s a prude, a killjoy, robotic by nature. Twitter seems to consider him as barely human, but you’ve been around Kiyoomi to know his faults, his shortcomings. You’ve seen enough of him that he doesn’t have to pretend around you.

The first time he slid a cigarette between his lips, you could hardly believe it.

Laid comfortably on expensive sheets, his hair wild from how you had been tugging on it earlier, swiping a lighter off his nightstand and pinching the cig between two fingers. You remember how he grinned at your disbelief, a handsome smile on his face at how he was able to catch you off guard, the smoke pooling above him in a wicked halo.

It’s what people do after a good fuck, isn’t it? He had joked. Consider this a compliment.

You remember feeling special. You remember feeling exactly how you feel right now.

“You make me happy, and I think I make you happy, too.” You watch the smoke dissipate into nothing, remnants swept away by a warm summer breeze. The cicadas grow quiet, muffled by the sound of your heartbeat in your ears.

You shift your attention from the sky overhead to the spiker. You find he’s already looking at you.

“It just makes sense.” He says.

You falter, “We’re not even dating.”

“Does it matter?” His response comes quickly, “We love each other, don’t we?”

You avert your eyes from his, afraid to fall captive to his piercing stare. His hand finds yours, rubbing smooth circles against your knuckles with a calloused thumb. Kiyoomi brings your hand to his lips, laying a soft kiss to the skin there. You draw a shaky breath, inevitably melting into him when he pulls you into his side, pressing you into him completely.

You’re surrounded by his body heat, the spiker towering over you. You hate how soothing it is. You hate how well your body responds to him, your eyes snapping back to him in an instant.

“I’ll take care of you,” His voice is hypnotic, equal parts captivating and petulant. You hate that you believe him, like always. “We’ll take care of each other. How does that sound?”

Your body betrays you. You feel yourself falling, the walls closing in until–

“Okay.”

Kiyoomi hums, taking another drag of his cigarette, and releasing the smoke into the night air. The carbon burns your eyes, and you cough at the second hand exposure. Kiyoomi’s grip on you tightens and the smoke curls around him, forming that same wicked halo floating against the edges of your memory.

You can hardly remember life before you met Kiyoomi, the memories as tangible as his cigarette smoke. Part of you thinks loving him was inevitable, inescapable. Truly, meant to be.

You don’t care what the other part of you thinks. Or anyone else, for that matter.

You bring your eyes back to the city below you, watching the streetlights flash and flicker and change.

Green, yellow, yellow.

Yellow, red, red.

Red, red, red.

hehehe i wanted to write something romantic but also left a sick feeling in your tummy. is it toxic obsession or is he just a freak in love? up 2 u baby its whatever you want it to be but lmk if this is too creepy!! so i can tag it as nfsw so it can go with my darker content!! ok bye love as always, niko ♡

#sakusa is a fucking CREEP #im always stuck between writing him as an absolute fucking loser or an international playboy #but above all else #sakusa kiyoomi is a freak #sakusa drabbles #sakusa kiyoomi #sakusa #kiyoomi sakusa #sakusa x reader #kiyoomi #msby sakusa #haikyuu #msby #haikyuu sakusa #angst #haikyuu angst #sfw

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morallyinept · 5 months

Text

Summary: Joel Miller comes back into your life unexpectedly after a gap of thirty years, and stirs up all kinds of memories and longing. Now, as you're stationed on an outpost for five days alone with the man you stupidly let go of all those years ago, you have a chance to confront him about your past life together and all the things you wished you’d said and done.

But Joel’s different now, and you know you need to tread carefully. Joel Miller is not the same man you once knew in another life.

A slow burn romance set in the post apocalyptic world, approx. twenty or so years after the initial Cordyceps outbreak.

Pairing: Post-Outbreak Joel Miller x MatureF!Reader (No name or physical description of reader. However reader is of a similar age range as Joel; in her late forties/early fifties. Joel is slightly older at 56.)

Chapter word count: 6.5k

Series Masterlist

☝🏻See Series Masterlist for full smut warnings & triggers in this story. Chapters that contain smut or triggers will be highlighted in the chapter notes below. 👇🏻

Chapter notes: You and Joel face the morning after your shared intimacy, and any consequences that may come with it. Mentions of smut and death/gore/blood. Descriptions of panic attacks.

☝🏻 I WILL NO LONGER BE ADDING NEW TAGS due to some of them not working as they should, despite me tagging, so please ensure you're following me and turn on notifs so you don't miss an update on this story.

Enjoy! 🖤

Previous Chapter

When dawn approaches, Joel stirs first; the intruding light glowing a dull orange behind his eyelids and pulling him out of a broken sleep.

Everything. Hurts. Like. Hell.

His back is still pulling tight and unrelenting - screaming at him that he needs to fucking move off this damned cot or be paralysed for life. His face feels raw with the grazes scabbing over in places and his arm is numb.

He turns to inhale you in and although he can’t feel his fingers where your weight is crushing them, he lays there enjoying the abstract sensation of your body shape nestled against his as you snooze. Something he still can’t quite comprehend in its entirety.

You’re here, you’re here alive. And you're with him, in his arms. You’ve let him inside of you, after all this time.

He winds his nose into your hairline and just listens to the sounds of you sleeping as he inhales. He can feel the small whooses of your breath against his sternum cooling him. And he thinks this is how it was always supposed to be.

He can smell the sex between you lingering in the air; the scent of sweat from your body, and he never wants to wash you off of his skin.

He replays it over in his mind, that first moment he entered you and how good you felt contracting around him. How good you’d always felt.

He’s swollen again. Aching. Morning wood, a new peculiarity that stirs grizzly between his legs after what feels like a long hiatus. No-one since Tess, and he thought there’d be no-one else. Destined to live in solace and loneliness, waiting until it was his time to check out of the world, growing ever more rickety in the bones and grey and thinning in the hair.

Despite the pain in his back, fof a moment he feels alive again as he feels the blood fill him thick.

There’s the calming sound of a few birds twittering outside and he’s lying here on the cramped cot, with come stained sheets, eyes closed enjoying just a few more minutes where Joel can pretend that nothing else exists outside of the shack, except for you.

That he’s back in his home in Austin, in his old bed with the wooden slats that creak each time he rolls over, and your naked body is curled around him in that sleep-warming haze.

He strokes all the way down your body to the little swollen belly you’ve got and places a kiss on it. You stir through bleary eyes as he looks up at you smiling, and that devilish smirk that he loves so much on your mouth has him trailing his lips lower still. He can feel you finger through his hair as he starts to lap at your pussy, tasting your honey that only gets sweeter each time.

Then, he can hear Sarah downstairs humming to her favourite song on the radio. She’s calling up and letting him know the pancakes and bacon are ready, and that he’ll be late for work if he doesn’t get a move on and-

Joel’s eyes snap open and he’s mourning the loss of that sweet, haunting reverie already as it sluices out of his ears to die on the threadbare pillow.

And then that voice; that insidious little fucker creeps up the base of his spine again, seemingly out of nowhere, and is heard taunting him. It leans over his shoulder with a sharp claw tapping against it.

She could never love you, Joel. Not after everything you’ve done.

In that split second of it pouring its words out at him, making him choke on the smoke of its beguiling voice, Joel feels that unmistakable rigidity flood him; like he’s hit freezing cold water face first.

It strips him of his breath, the enamel on his teeth; his leg muscles coil and pull tight and he tries to suck in oxygen that flaunts itself at him with an evil smirk as it feels so far out of reach as he gasps for it.

His fist comes up to the centre of his chest and he shudders, encased in that spiralling grip once more, sinking and drowning.

You’re going to die, Joel. All alone.

He can’t breathe, he can’t see anymore. He’s just cold and shivering and unable to surface, and all rational thought has abandoned him.

You hear me, Joel? Alone!

“Joel? Do you hear me?”

The sound of your voice is what pulls him back slowly; the small semblance of recognition through the foggy void that reaches in and grabs him, yanking by the ankles.

He locks eyes with you and instantly the shame devours him; spitting out gristle chunks of him until there is nothing left. He pulls away from you, sitting up on the cot as you reach up and squeeze his thick shoulder affectionately.

“Joel-” You query carefully.

“S’nothin’,” he immediately cuts you off, and the jerk of his shoulder makes you drop your hand like you’ve been stung.

You can only watch, confused and concerned as he dresses quickly, despite the hisses between his teeth from the lingering pain, and retreats out of the shack muttering something about the horses.

He stays outside for a long time; most of the morning is swallowed up by his obvious, intruding absence. You’re not sure what he’s doing, and you can only stare at the plate of uneaten food you’ve left for him that has long since turned cold and dried out.

His back, broad and hunched, was presented to you in the stable when you went to let him know it was ready. He offered you no acknowledgement, no familiar grunt in response.

Just bubonic silence that got under your skin and infected you with doubt and worry until it forced you to retreat.

You’re now sitting in the wicker chair gawking out at the valley while smouldering away inside.

You stare at the walkie-talkie with a swill of nervousness swashing around your gut. It was only yesterday the crackled warning came through and then you were ambushed by the infected. But all that seems so far away considering it led to you and Joel to physically expressing your requited pining for one another.

The memory sears into your brain; his mouth on yours, his rough, deft hands on your body… the grunting sounds of his pleasure.

You feel it flutter in your gut and between your legs, and you hitch a breath at the recall that you can still taste on your tongue.

The words ink themself on your skin, he loves you. He always has. It’s what you’ve longed to hear for so long.

And now it’s led to him hiding from you like a child facing his scary closet monster for the first time. You can’t help but feel slightly rejected, despite knowing that you haven’t done anything wrong - have you?

You glance at the clocks and they read a little after ten AM. You stand sighing and reach for your handgun. You holster it to your hip and decide to go for a walk - you need to get out of the shack, away from the trussed up sheets of the cot where the ghosts of you both still writhe and moan in ecstacy.

Away from the missing shape of him filling up the air you breathe. The heat is beginning to stifle again and Joel’s behaviour isn’t helping.

You’re not sure if he’s still in the stable. You hear the sound of the mare whinnying gently as you pass, but you don’t check.

The lumpy constriction in the back of your throat strangles you as you pass and stomp lithely down the path.

You pass the bodies; flies circling and feasting on the rotting flesh. You’re so mad even the smell doesn't deter you as you step over them.

“Why don’t ya ever fuckin’ listen to me?” Joel scolds you as you step back into the shack a little while later.

Your body is hot and sticky from sun exposure and the sweat sticks to you, irritating you further.

Joel saw you trail the path back up to the shack, fuming. He was preparing himself to go out looking for you when he saw your body; small and wandering down at the bottom of the hill.

Gritting his teeth, he endured that slow walk you did whilst rooted to the spot at the window, with fists clenched and recalling all the times before, when you were younger, that your free spirit and desire to chase impulse would come between you more often than not.

As much as he loved you, that lingering platitude of your careless wanderings always irked him.

Leading to passionate, heated debates and arguments he wouldn’t engage in much, which riled you up even more. Then you would take off again in a huff, to spite him and leave him floundering and worried.

You’d always come back though, tail between your legs and kissing him round to fucking you in forgiveness - until you didn’t.

Joel remembers the last time you left and he waited for you to come back. Waited probably longer than he should have.

You didn’t come back.

“Ya could’ve got hurt.” He growls at you.

He’s pissed as he puffs out his chest, hand on slender hip as you pass him and discard your holster onto the cot that’s still a mess.

“I didn’t.” You simply say, brushing it off.

“S’not the point.” He snarks.

“Then what is, Joel? I’ve been taking care of myself long before you showed up back in my life.” You bite back.

He grumbles, words you can’t decipher, as he sighs and frowns at the ground.

“Old habits die hard.” You simply retort and he glances at you with dark eyes and a pout.

“Ya can’t be doin’ shit like this, not on my watch.” He trails off, losing himself in the dissipating anger, trying to swallow it down fully.

"Your watch? I'm a grown woman, Joel. You're not my keeper." You growl.

He rolls his eyes chewing on the inside of his gums. “Where’d y’go?”

“For a walk.” You say bluntly. You lift off your top and swap it out for one that smells less stagnant under the arms. “You’re not the only one who can run away and hide, you know.”

“Is that what ya think I was doin’?”

“Isn’t it?” You lance him a knowing look and he hangs his head, guilty as charged. “What was that this morning, Joel?” You question and he shakes his head.

You change tactics and approach him gently, reaching for his face, but he bats your hand away and you scoff, annoyed.

“You’re not going to let me in? Not after-”

“I can’t.” Joel reiterates. You can see it pains him to, his eyes pleading with you not to push it.

You nod, defeated and step back as he passes you and sits himself down on the chair. His hand rubs at his temple - the side with the scar.

“I’m sorry. I was insensitive, brash. Taking off like that. But you have to understand, I've fended for myself for so long. I’ve had to.” You explain.

“I get it.” He nods gently. “I can’t lose ya,” he says, barely a whisper.

“You won’t. Promise.”

“No,” he shakes his head and looks up at you. “Ya can’t make that kinda promise, not now.”

“Then,” you sit opposite him. “I promise I’ll always do everything in my power to make sure I come back to you. I promise not to be so reckless. How’s that?”

Joel sighs, his giant palms dropping onto his knees as he massages one gently. “Better,” he gruffs. He tries not to smile, but you can see he’s struggling.

“I get it too.” You say, after a few minutes pass between you that’s filled with a suffocating silence.

“Get what?” He questions.

“You’re scared of the way I make you feel.” You begin at him. “Because you don’t want to feel anything. You’ve spent so long making sure that you don’t.”

He shakes his head as your nodding increases.

“And it's terrifying. It is for me, too.” You admit. "It's easier to have nothing then lose something you care about, right?"

Joel frowns. Then sighs. Then wants to strangle you because you used to do this. You used to get into his head with simple ease. Break down his impenetrable walls and sneak in, and he has no fucking idea how you do it. Or how you can still do it after all this time.

“It’s better that way.” He mutters bitterly.

“For who?” You watch as his back stiffens. His neck disappearing into his shoulders. His serious expression melts away a little. Another chink in his armour. Then he shakes his head again, muttering incoherently under his breath and you can hear some cursing going on.

“Why are you doing this?” You question.

“I lost someone,” Joel drones, reminding you; his tongue turning around his teeth.

“Sarah.” You confirm, accepting his pain and understanding. Or at least trying to; you would never understand that pain he harbours fully as you’re not a parent.

“No,” Joel shakes his head and looks at you, despite the pain twisting around his scruffy face. “Myself.”

It comes out as a croak that dies a horrific death on his tongue. You watch as his eyes glisten and you reach for him instinctively. But it’s not enough.

You get up and sit in his lap and he doesn’t resist this time when you wrap your arms around his broad shoulders. He buries his face into the crook of your neck as you offer him what he so desperately needs.

“I don’t deserve any of this,” Joel begins, a mouthful of your skin.

“What makes you think that?” His brown eyes are red in the whites and you watch as he wipes them with the back of his hand quickly.

“‘Cause, I’ve done so much that I should be punished for. In the old world, I'd be rottin’ in a cell now.”

“We’re not in the old world anymore, Joel.” But he was still there, stuck and forever looping it seems.

"Ya've no idea what I've done. If ya did, you'd take that rifle n' shoot me between the eyes. N' I wouldn't stop ya."

You scoff. “You think because you did bad things, things to survive, that you’re not deserving of affection now? Of redemption? You’re wrong, Joel.”

“Ya don’t get it, darlin’.” He shakes his head solemnly.

“No, you don’t get it.” You correct and he looks at you with a quick shift of his eyeballs and nothing else. “We’ve all done bad things, things we had to. Terrible things. The world forced us to. You think we were prepared for it? That this is the curveball life was going to throw at us? Every single one of us has done things that, yeah, sure in the old world, we'd be punished for. But now? If faced with it, we’d do it again. You wanna know why?”

“Why?” He asks softly.

You breathe in, reciting Kelper’s words when you’d needed them the most. “Because in this world you have to have something to fight for. To be reckless for… To kill for. If you don’t have that, you may as well roll over and die now because there is nothing else. It's all gone. It's all fucking gone…" You sniff as your own eyes water. "And something tells me you're not ready to do that.”

Your fingers stroke at the nape of his neck softly, curling his hair around your fingers.

“Are you?” Joel asks tentatively.

“I was.” You say, glancing down at your scar as your hand rests on your thigh. “But turns out, I still got some fight in me. And so do you.”

Joel sniffs deeply and sighs out; his head falls forward and rests on yours and you stay like that for a little while.

"How’d ya fuckin' do that?" He asks into your eyelashes in wonderment.

His arms just wrap around you and hold you to him as you kiss the top of his head gently.

“I just know the subject matter really well.” You smile into his crown. “Better than he knows himself.”

“Ya do,” he pulls away to look at you; deep browns with a pulling, hypnotic warmth boring into you and heating you up.

You feel his hands sliding up your back, fingers notching over your spine nodules and making you shudder.

He smiles at your reaction, the smile blooming on your lips as you enjoy the feeling of him exploring.

“Know ya really well too, darlin’. I never forgot.” He says, as he latches onto your lips.

Joel switches the walkie-talkie back on later, and you both wait silently.

He throws a glance at you, one that tells you he can still taste you in his mouth. You squeeze your thighs together at the recall of him laying you back down on the cot after your heart-to-heart, and proving to you again how much love he did have inside him, as he filled you up with it.

But now you both sit silently, waiting for any news.

You can feel your gut weighing down to your feet like concrete blocks, and sure enough a voice comes through over the static that’s more clear to receive today.

It’s a voice you recognise and Joel grabs it and speaks. “Tommy?”

“Joel. Goddamn. Ya guys hangin’ in there?”

“Just ‘bout.” Joel's eyes dart towards yours and you smile tightly in agreement. Fine, hanging threads.

“What happened yesterday? Had a small pocket of infected pay us a visit.” He speaks into the walkie, his thumb letting go of the receiver when he finishes.

“I figured they’d head ya way. Ya pick up my signal?”

Joel swallows as he glances out the window, his eyes squinting in the light. “Yeah.”

You both know it was a close call and your mind shifts to that strident moment when Joel was yanked backwards by the body and tumbled down the hill with it, and it makes your stomach lurch.

That could have ended very differently and it doesn’t bear thinking about as you swallow it away.

“We handled it. ‘Bout twenty or so. Put ‘em down.” Joel explains.

The walkie crackles. “Horde’s gotten bigger. We had to regroup, weren’t expectin’ it. Was fuckin’ chaos.”

Joel grits his teeth and you sit forward in the chair sighing, your hands fisting together under your chin and listening carefully. Trying not to imagine the guys - Kelper, Max and Sal - out of their depths. But you hold fast and steady. They can handle it, deep down you know it.

They’re fine.

“Second team managed to get the explosives laid down. We’re ready for tomorrow. S’gonna go down as planned.” Tommy continues.

“Good,” Joel replies.

You nod with some small relief ebbing through your bones.

“Listen Joel. I gotta tell ya somethin’.”

“M’all ears.” Joel says as he looks at you; his brown eyes softening as he takes you in, sending a small affectionate smile back up at him.

He swears in this moment he's probably never loved you more, and the thought makes him sweat a little. He reaches for your knee and gives it a squeeze, watches with some contented awe as your fingers lock into his.

“We were ambushed by infected breakin’ off. Chased us down. We had to let ‘em. Couldn’t risk the whole horde noticin’...”

Joel nods even though Tommy can’t see. You swallow thickly as you both listen.

Your heartbeat speeds up, you can hear it start to steamroll in your ears, almost drowning Tommy’s voice out.

“What happened?” Joel asks with a brewing frown.

Yesterday...

The sun hangs low in the desolate sky, casting an eerie glow over the barren landscape. Sparse woodlands with resilient trees run parallel, separated by a wide stretching field that’s filled with the moving shuffle of infected bodies en masse.

Tommy can feel the sweat pooling at the back of his neck, gathering in the jet curls where he rubs listlessly at his sun-beaten nape.

From this position, hidden craftily behind the bushes, he’s got a good view.

Kelper, kneeling beside him, peers through the binoculars and sighs gently; but his face is etched with acute determination, watching the horde move towards the direction of the canyon as planned, that seems to echo with the ominous whispers of impending danger at any moment.

Tommy adjusts his position carefully, crouched behind the thick brush, with aching knees and thighs; his fingers tightly gripping the worn handle of his weapon should he need it.

His breaths come in shallow bursts, the tension in the air almost suffocating. Kelper, the seasoned survivor, keeps his gaze fixated on the passing horde of death, just a few yards out from them.

“How many do ya think there are?” Tommy whispers.

Kelper shrugs. “More than a thousand now, that’s for sure.”

They've swelled in numbers; strays attaching themselves to the wider congregation as they move, led by the unseen force of the group spread up and down the route ensuring they don’t divert.

“How is this even possible?”

Kelper turns to look at Tommy and shakes his head at a loss. “Evolution?”

The moans of the infected reverberate, creating an eerie symphony that underscores the gravity of their situation. Tommy shifts uncomfortably, glancing between them and in the far direction of where the explosives are being set to detonate.

“Come on ya bastards…” He mutters.

Kelper smirks. “We’ll get ‘em there. Plan’s been working well so far. We keep pushing. Last hurdle, right?”

“Don’t be fuckin’ jinxin’ us now, man.” Tommy says, a thin smirk pricking at the corner of his lips.

“Hold your nerve. We’re almost home. Get you back to your lady and your kid.” Kelper assures.

Tommy smiles and looks at him. “What 'bout you? Ya got any family left?”

Kelper shakes his head. “Just the ones I arrived with.”

Tommy nods. “Right.”

“They’re all I need.” Kelper nods, smiling to himself.

“Do ya ever wonder if we're becomin’ as heartless as ‘em?” Tommy asks after a few beats of silence.

He nods out to the horde. His eyes bear the weariness of a thousand battles, yet a glimmer of something unresolved flickers within the darkness of them.

“You start to blur the lines between the living and the dead out here, Tommy. But heartless? No, we're fighting for something more than just breath in our lungs.” Kelper says.

"Ya think they know? Like they still have some conscious thought or shit?"

Kelper shakes his.head. "Nah. Whoever they were, they're long gone."

"Whatever makes ya sleep at night, right?"

"Maybe." Kelper replies.

“I just don't wanna forget what it means to be human, y’know? My brother… he’s lost his humanity. I see it when I look at him now.” Tommy says, shaking his head despondently. “I love him, but… I can’t be like that.”

“I don’t think anyone ever truly loses their humanity.” Kelper says. “If we did, we’d be exactly like them.”

“How’d ya know we ain’t? They’re just tryin’ to survive, like we are.”

“You feel bad for them?” Kelper's jaw tightens, his gaze drifting to the distant shadows where the infected still roam. The burden of leadership etching deep lines on his face and casting deeper shadows under his eyes.

“They were people once, even if they ain't now.” Tommy states. “Hard not to feel some guilt sometimes.”

Kelper smiles. “That’s how you know you’re still human.”

Tommy glances down at the ground and nods contemplating.

“Being human means adapting, surviving. Sometimes, it means doing things you never thought you would. But it's also about holding on to a glimmer of who you were. You just need to remind your brother of that sometimes. And yourself.”

Kelper's gaze meets Tommy's, a shared understanding passing between them. The depths of the woodlands seem to amplify the words, carrying them into the void where shadows whisper of both survival and sacrifice.

“What if there's another way? A way to survive without sacrificin’ our humanity all the time?” Tommy queries, his voice a low baritone.

“There isn't room for what-ifs in this world. Every move we make is a gamble. We're just trying to tip the odds in our favour. This world doesn't care about ideals. It cares about survival.”

The weight of Kelper's words settle on Tommy's shoulders, pressing down with the burden of a world gone mad.

Kelper shoots him a glance, a look with the harsh realism of their existence. “We're all paying a price. Sometimes it's just steeper for some.”

“I just... I need to believe there's somethin’ more than just survivin’. For my son.” Tommy says.

Kelper's gaze softens for a moment, a flicker of sympathy cutting through the grizzled exterior.

“I think ‘bout the world waitin’ for him. If it can ever be like it used to. Sounds fuckin’ dumb, I know.”

Kelper shakes his head. “Not dumb. You survive long enough, you start thinking about living. But first, you've got to make it through the hard nights.”

They both glance at one another again.

“We’re changing the world, for your son; for everyone. One dead parasite at a time.” Kelper says with a sincere smile offered.

Tommy nods, and then jumps as the bleep of his radio sounds on his hip.

“Fuck!” He scrambles for it. “I said radio silence!” Tommy hisses into the walkie.

He shoots his glance up, muffling the sound of the walkie with his jacket.

Kelper keeps watch on the horde, who don’t seem to have heard it.

A voice crackles over the low frequency. It's Max. “We got a problem… there’s… shit! Run!-”

Kelper scans the horizon with the binoculars. “No, no, no, no…” He murmurs in an increasing tempo shaking his voice.

“What?!” Tommy rushes forward and snatches the binoculars as Kepler stands.

In the distance he can see bodies breaking off from the rear of the horde and disappearing into the woodlands.

“Fuck!”

Kelper moves and Tommy follows.

“Hey!”

“We gotta stop this!" Kelper says, frantic. “We can’t let them change course. We need the others to keep them moving forward.” Kelper pelts as he starts to run. “If the bulk of the horde notices, they’ll all come at them!”

“Fuck!” Tommy paces after him.

“We have to create a diversion.”

“How?” Tommy pulls Kelper back by the shoulder, yanking him fiercely. "What d'ya mean a diversion?"

Kelper weighs it up and comes up with a desperate blank before a dark realisation settles in over his features. “We have to take them.”

Tommy shakes his head. “Thats fuckin’ suicide.”

“You have another idea? We have to get the others. We can’t do this without them.”

Tommy’s stumped and shakes his head. “It’s not worth the risk. A few strays-”

“Fuck the risk! I’m not losing anymore people to these bastards!” Kelper spits.

A few beats exist and pulse around them before the decision is made.

“I’ll draw them back through and join you on the other side of thise trees." He points across the field to a clearing beyond the woodlands there. "Round up the others ready.”

Tommy doesn't have time to protest further. He can only watch as Kelper sprints off towards the small branch of infected that have wandered off into the trees after Max's group.

“Fuck!” He grits and takes off towards the field. Tommy radios the others, instructing them to meet him, but he’s met with crackled silence as he runs.

His face batters wayward branches as he dashes forward; the beat of his heart in his throat. Then he stops as though hitting a wall as he hears it.

The echo reverberates through the clearing, and the small swarm of infected, like puppets drawn by an unseen force, turn their attention towards Kelper.

His defiant shout slices through the air; a battle cry tinged with both bravado and desperation.

“Fuckin’ idiot!” Tommy seethes.

As the infected converge towards Kelper instead, the small group, including Tommy, seize the fleeting opportunity to slip past unscathed and unnoticed into position.

The air thickens with a cocktail of relief and guilt. The clearing seems to close in around them, casting shadows that pulse with the haunting thrum of brutish survival. They can only hope the main horde didn't hear Kelper.

Tommy steals a glance back; the torment of leaving Kelper behind etched across his face.

The sounds of a struggle punctuate, each blow landing on undead flesh as Kelper fights them off bravely. The air feels charged with an unspoken understanding - Kelper's creating the diversion, but at what cost?

As the group distance themselves from the small swarm, the guilt claws at Tommy's chest. A corridor of remorse that resonates with the cries of the infected and the desperate struggle of a man who has willingly put himself in harm's way.

“We can't just leave him!” Max whispers to Tommy.

“He knew the risks. We gotta keep movin’.” Tommy ushers him forward, but hesitates himself. His stance falters, a magnetic pull urging him to turn back.

“Okay, we take ‘em. All of ‘em. Not one of ‘em lives, ya hear me? Make it snappy, make it quiet. No guns. Just blades.” He instructs.

They all nod at him, eyes wide and ready to go as chaos spills out into the clearing.

Kelper's eyes flick with a mix of surprise and relief as Tommy and the small group flood in towards him. The reinforcements inject a surge of hope into the struggle, weapons slashing through the infected with calculated precision.

The small swarm, once focused solely on Kelper, now face a united front. They fight with a fierce determination, their movements synchronised in a brutal beat against the encroaching threat of screeches and teeth.

Kelper, momentarily freed from the relentless assault, locks eyes with Tommy. There’s gratitude in the glance; a recognition of the camaraderie that has driven Tommy to return.

The fight rages on, but in that moment, a silent understanding passes between the two leaders as they resonate about not leaving anyone behind, no matter the stakes.

The commune needs a man like Kelper, Tommy thinks. Perhaps he can spend more time with his son and less time making decisions.

The skirmish continues; the group pushing back the infected with a collective force that speaks of their shared resilience.

They can do this. Nip it in the bud now.

“Shit!” Tommy cries, as more infected flood through the trees towards them.

Kelper turns at the commotion as they run out, and he locks eyes with one.

It stops him in his tracks and he feels it like ice in his bones.

It looks like… you.

It has your face, your gait, your hair even.

And he knows it isn’t you; knows somewhere in the back of his head that Joel’s taking care of you at the outpost, or you're taking care of him, but for a split second, it’s enough to render Kelper useless on his feet as the sinking realisation of failing you floods through him.

He’s frozen to the spot, frozen in fear just watching the infected impersonator run closer towards him.

You're coming for him.

Somewhere, he hears his name being yelled as it hits the back of his head in a dull fuzz as he stands there, unable to move his limbs, for what feels like an age.

But it’s long enough for him to feel it; that searing burn as teeth clamp down on the side of his neck and his blood spills into its mouth.

The world has stopped turning, leaving him alone inside his frantic battle with screaming and viscera everywhere.

The bloodstained face of Tommy holds dark, cold eyes as he works his way through the infected effortlessly. Picking them off one by one with his bare hands it seems and leaving no indication of remorse as he goes and yells frantically at Kelper.

The thuds as the lifeless entities fall to the ground thunders through the clearing, sending vibrations towards Kelper. He can feel it in his toes.

He’s not sure how it happens, but the one who is latched onto him is now dead at his feet as he tries to stem the bleeding.

The noise is deafening and Kelper is lost out of eye sight, somewhere amongst the throes of more bodies ramming against them; their faces mangled with bitter hatred and the determination to slaughter the infected with just cause.

The infected have gathered their numbers well, and it appears as though Tommy is outnumbered as Kelper glances back at them, stunned and shaking.

A single handful of elite warriors facing off against a swarm of hideous monsters, intent on shedding blood in their ravaging hunger. It's like watching a movie play out in front of him, and he's helpless to intervene.

And like those ancient Spartans from film reels gone by, Tommy commands a small unit of his most relentless soldiers. Determined and hell bent on seeking justice and retribution. Their strength is not in their numbers, for they could stand alone and wield the power of many.

Regular men and women, baptised into the fire of combat, they’re taught from the aftermath of the apocalypse never to retreat, never to surrender. No pain, no mercy.

Endure and fucking survive!

A well orchestrated phalanx, breaking off into sections when under threat, but soon chaos ensues, blood is spilt. God’s wrath pouring across the land like hot, bubbling lava.

But still they hold strong.

Tommy fiercely wields his machete as though it’s fluid; sharp steel thrusting in and out of rotting, fungal skin in mere seconds as he fights his way to Kelper.

His cries of war echo over the field and into the ears of those who are in earshot. Instructions in wrath, commands in murder, and praise in blood.

A fearless leader despite his earlier reservations, and it’s not hard to see why the others admire and follow him so.

Kelper smiles, not burdened anymore with that baton previously held tightly in his grip; he’s happy to hand it over. He never was a leader, not really. Just a determined son of a bitch to not falter and wither.

But it's time to rest now. He had his moment in the sun; plenty of them as they flash behind his flickering eyelids as his vision starts to water and blur.

The warmth of his mother's embrace. The first time he smoked weed under the bleachers in high school. His first gay crush on Bobby Denton. Man... Bobby fucking Denton. He smiles as he remembers a pretty face he thought he'd forgotten.

Coming out to his father who looked upon him with scorn and disappointment, while his mother welcomed him with open arms. She never did blame him for their divorce. Not once. But he knew.

His first love; the first time he bared his puny heart to Phillip, who reciprocated. The first man to actually love him back.

Phillip, who was wrenched from his arms on outbreak day, in mass hysteria at the shopping mall - at the fucking Gap of all places. He couldn’t find him. Lost him amongst the crowds running and screaming.

He never got to give him the ring...

Kelper remembers the small band of survivors he’s called family for the last several years. Remembers when he found you huddled in a dirty, shivering ball and trying to take his head off as he approached tentatively.

Fuck, he can’t leave you. What the fuck is he doing?

He looks down at his hand, covered in his own blood, and already feels lightheaded.

“I’m sorry, Goose…” he chokes out, blood gushing down his front and sticky on his chest.

Flashes of your hands are on his, nursing him back to health. He can taste the time you kissed him, and then apologised, and it took everything in him to pull away from your lips, questioning everything he’d ever known about himself. Drawn to you somehow. What was it, loneliness? Desperation?

Love?

Did he love you, more than that?

The hungry, consuming eyes stare down upon him in their millions it seems, and he welcomes the whisper of death with a smile on his face and a middle finger.

A small grunt of satisfaction tears through him and the faint beats of his name are heard somewhere in the distance.

He knows you’re strong. That you crinkle your nose when you laugh at something he says when you feel bereft, he can see it now. Hear it even; it’s echoing all around him as they tear into him, blocking out the sun.

At the end of a hard day enduring, surviving, seeing you smile at him makes everything alright. He never told you enough.

Never told you everyday that he fucking loved you.

He hopes you knew. Hopes you knew that in another world, he loved you the way you might have wanted him to.

He should have been the one, in another life he deduces that he probably would have been. You’d both be married with papery skin, sitting on rocking chairs overlooking the ocean with fat grandchildren playing at your feet.

But in this life, he had you as a friend. A soulmate. And it seemed better somehow. Transcendant.

It was worth it all.

Kelper drops his weapon, his fingers weak and unable to use it now. Unsteady on his feet as they devour. Blurred vision splits the sun in two and hot wetness is felt below his abdomen, searing at first, but soon massaged away by the delight of nausea.

He’s deluded and sincere. He knows you love him. That Guthrie, Max and Sal love him. That Phillip loves him, wherever he is. Perhaps he’ll see him soon.

He believes it and it will ensure he can pass on happily. Content. At peace.

Fuck, he deserves some peace. He chuckles, hearing it in his ears above the cacophony of their grunts and groans.

He recalls those precious moments; moments where the darkness of the world disappeared for a while. It wasn’t all doom and gloom and fungal bloodshed.

There was always light in the darkness when you were lost, you just had to look for it.

Remembering his smile lost inside of your freshly washed hair that smelt of wild flowers, breathing in the notes as you slumbered peacefully on his chest after he saved your life.

He can smell them now, the clearing has come alive with them, sprouting up everywhere and beautiful from root to petal.

He wishes he could show you them.

It gives him comfort in his last moments where he falters now alone in this barren clearing, where the earth has been cracked and splintered by the creatures that ravage it now.

Kelper falls backwards against the hard ground, but doesn’t notice the pain. The lights will soon dim, but he can’t take his eyes off of your smile, your resilience.

How strong he knows you’ll be in this world without him.

You’ll be alright, Goose…

He gives into it now, comes quietly despite the sound of teeth around his face.

And as Kelper slips away from this world into the next one, a single tear flows from the crease of his eye, never to be seen by anyone.

“... We lost Kelper.” Tommy confirms over the static.

Joel’s eyes immediately flick to yours; his face sinking as you sit forward gripping the chair rests, your eyes filling with water.

No.

“He didn’t make it.” Tommy says. “They got him. Was pretty bad and-”

“Tommy, stop talkin’!” Joel hisses down the radio cutting him off as he sees your expression changing.

No.

You’re shaking your head, but you don’t feel the physical motion. You’re instantly numb.

No. No. He’s wrong.

The next thing you know you’re screeching into the walkie, having snatched it from Joel’s hand, and telling Tommy frantically that he’s wrong.

Yelling through to him to stop fucking around and put Kelper on so you can talk to him. You need to hear his voice. Hear him say he’s okay.

Because he is - he has to be! There’s no way that he-

“M'so sorry, sweetheart," Tommy’s voice says, as Joel grapples with you, but you don’t hear it.

You don’t hear anything else except your own frantic wailing and screams as you sink to the floor, Joel catching you in his arms and crushing you tight against him, as you finally break in two.

No.

NO!

To be continued...

Main Masterlist | Series Masterlist | Prev Chapter | Next Chapter

Thank you for taking the time to read my story; it really means so much to me. I'd love to know your thoughts, and I'd really appreciate a re-blog so others can enjoy this story too. Thank you so much 🖤

MAIN MASTERLIST

TAGLIST: If you'd like to be added/removed, please let me know.

Tagging everyone who asked to be tagged & who re-blogged my teaser.

@secretelephanttattoo @morgaussy @darkheartgatita @sp00kymulderr @survivingandenduring @sin-djarin @lilmizmoz @yazsos @ryangoslingstanktop @barbellpedro @givemeth @anavatazes @alwaysmicado @the-blind-assassin-12 @kirsteng42 @missredherring @gasolinerainbowpuddles @millennial-teenybopper @maggiemayhemnj @harriedandharassed @stevie75 @mysterious-moonstruck-musings @chaoticfestninja @reddedmiller @doughmonkey @sonderosa @magpiepillsjunior @chronically-ghosted @pedroswife69 @regalwhovianbrowncoat774 @marisemonteiroo @everythingiwanttoread @jjhayhay20 @nerdieforpedro @perennialdoll247 @casa-boiardi @joeldjarin @sscorpiiio @untamedheart81 @srmacaroni @violinchick @orcasoul @lucyeyelesbarrow @mandrillusphinx @loveisacowboyyy @suzmagine @disassociation-daydreams @anoverwhelmingdin @within-the-depths

#joel miller x reader #pedro pascal x reader #joel miller tlou #pedro pascal #joel miller x f!reader #joel miller fanfic #joel miller the last of us #joel miller fic #joel miller smut #joel miller fluff #joel miller angst #joel miller x female reader #the last of us fic #pedro pascal characters #five days #five days series #jett's writing

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hiding-in-my-blanket-fort · 10 months

Text

Making Simon “Ghost” Riley into your boy toy (F!Reader):

Inspired by the stunning work on Twitter by BettyBRenders who created the image below that knocked the breath out of me and left me wheezing for a solid ten minutes.

TW: bondage, dom/sub elements, praise kink, a touch of humiliation/degradation???, dirty talk, unprotected PIV sex (wrap it up!!), mentions of drinking/alcohol, submissive Ghost (minors absolutely NO PEEKING UNDER THE CUT)

You worked as a bartender at a local place that Simon often frequents after a mission. The two of you developed a friendly and comfortable vibe, but you didn’t pry when he was brooding which he appreciated.

If Simon was honest, he was a little sweet on you. Admiring you from afar. He loved that you let your sassy side show when you became more familiar with him.

So it was late one night, the bar was practically empty and the two of you got talking. The alcohol was working its magic, loosening tongues and boosting confidence, lowering inhibitions. And there was definitely some flirting going on.

When you mentioned that you hadn’t been on a date in a while, that surprised Simon.

“Why?” he asked.

You shrugged. “I have certain…tastes. They intimidate most men.”

Your gaze drags up to meet his and Simon can tell you’re studying him. You wipe down the bar and then stop with your hands braced on the counter as you lean in. He holds your gaze without blinking the whole time.

“You don’t look like the type of guy to shy away from anything,” you say.

A small smile curls up at the corner of his mouth. “Sounds like a challenge to me.”

You give a coy little shrug. “Maybe it is.”

Normally, you never go home with a customer. But the chemistry between you and Simon is sizzling hot and you’re not about to pass up this opportunity. So you reach over and you hook two fingers into the silver gleam of his dog tags at his throat, tugging him closer.

“I’d like to make you my boy toy for the night,” you whisper. “Does that scare you, tough guy?”

He smirks with a breathy little laugh that has your stomach in butterflies. He doesn’t back down, unlike most guys you’ve shared your fantasy with who can’t handle being dominated.

“I’d like to see you try, love. I doubt you could break me.”

That’s the green light you’ve been hoping for and you shut down the bar, kicking out the few stranglers who are still lingering. Minutes later, you’re in a hotel room with Simon, pushing him through the door as he backs up.

He always an intimidating presence when he entered the bar, but now that you’re alone with him, touching him, trailing your hands up his torso, you realize he really is just a solid wall of muscle.

“Jesus fucking Christ,” you mutter under your breath, practically ripping his shirt open in your desperation to reach skin.

You push Simon deeper into the room until you pull out a chair. His shirt is unbuttoned now, still tucked into his pants. He’s left his mask halfway pushed up his face, the way he usually wears it when he’s in the bar. You glimpse scars and tattoos and muscles and you’re pretty much salivating at this point.

“Sit,” you say.

Simon fixes you with a steady look as he lowers himself into the chair, spreading his knees wide, hands resting atop his thighs.

“Shirt,” you say. “Take it off. Won’t be needing it.”

He huffs a laugh and obeys without protest. He could easily fight you on any of your demands and you wouldn’t be able to force him to do a damn thing so you’re curious to see how far you can push before he starts to get a little resistant. You’ve known Simon for a while now and you really want to see what it takes to get him to run his mouth off a bit.

When you pull out a pair of handcuffs from your purse, Simon’s eyes flicker slightly but that’s the only tell he’ll give you. He doesn’t budge as you put them on.

You circle him, dragging your hand over his biceps, his shoulders, sliding down his chest and back up to cradle his throat. As you skim your hand through his hair, Simon tilts his head back, watching you.

As you come around to stand in front of him, you push in between his knees. Hooking your fingers into his dog tags, you tug the chain snug beneath his chin, forcing his head up.

Simon’s pupils go totally BLACK. His lips part and his Adam’s apple bobs, giving away just how hot he thinks you are.

You smile a little. “You’re very laidback for a guy cuffed to a chair.”

“Not my first time, princess,” he replies. “If you want to rattle me, you’ll have to try harder than that.”

You raise your eyebrows and curve your palms over the top of Simon’s thighs, gliding higher and higher.

“Are you saying,” you reply, your voice low as you nuzzle against his cheek. “You’re not turned on right now?”

Simon clenches his jaw tight and says nothing. But he watches you. God, this man never STOPS looking at you. Studying you.

You kiss his neck, sucking at his pulse, smoothing your tongue over his skin and scraping with your teeth.

“If I touched you,” you murmured into his neck. “Would you be hard for me?”

You move your palms lower, bracketing his inner thighs, not quite touching his groin. Simon’s gaze drops to your hands, his lashes shielding his expression. But he dips his head in a single, barely-there nod.

You brush your knuckles against his crotch, finding his cock straining against his jeans. Holy hell, you knew he’d be big and now you can’t wait to actually see him.

At your touch, Simon doesn’t make a sound. But his eyes flutter closed and he bows his head. He looks like a man steeling himself for inevitable torture.

The metallic clank of his belt echoes in the anticipatory silence of the room as you unbuckle him, drag the zipper of his fly down with a gritty rasp.

Simon is watching you again with pitch black eyes. He doesn’t move a muscle and sits as still as a statue as you pull out his gorgeous, thick cock and wrap your fingers around him. But he throbs in your hand, betraying just how much he’s enjoying himself.

You bite your lip with a grin as you circle your thumb over the head of his shaft.

“With equipment like this, you must have the stamina have a horse,” you say, endlessly circling your thumb. Simon’s breath grows shallower and shallower. The tendons in his neck stand out. “I could fuck myself on your cock, coming again and again, but you…”

You trailed off, kneeling between his thighs and kissed the tip of his cock, slowly, flicking your tongue along the slit.

Simon’s breath catches in his throat. His abs flex tight and hard as a slab of granite.

“You wouldn’t come if I ordered you not to, right, Simon?” you said, smiling sweetly up at him, your breath fanning over his cock with every word. The sight of you right now is enough to completely wreck him, but he has a will of iron and he’s stubborn as fuck.

And he has to admit: you’re right. He’s a man accustomed to following orders.

You scrape your teeth over his hip, dragging a long, deep groan out of Simon when the welt appears.

“Fucking hell, you little minx,” he growls.

He breaks off with a strangled noise when you slide a hand lower and cup his balls with a firm squeeze.

“Goddamn it,” he breathes out, tipping his head back.

Feeling very smug and satisfied watching Simon slowly begin to crumble, you stand and shimmy out of your jeans and underwear. As you straddle Simon, you take a fistful of his hair and pinch his lower lip between your teeth.

“Do you want me to stop, Simon?” you ask softly with a teasing note in your voice. “Is it too much for you to handle?”

You feel Simon shift beneath you, straining at the cuffs, fists clenched. He’s strong enough that you have no doubt he could probably just bust out of them.

“Don’t tell me this is all you’ve got, love,” he says. “If you think you can make me beg already, you’ll have to work harder for it.”

You raise your eyebrows at the way he’s goading you on.

“Oh, is that what you’re waiting for, Simon?” you ask in a sugary-sweet voice. “You want me to make you beg for it?”

He manages a breathless laugh, his eyes bright with this banter between you, loaded with sexual tension. So you line up his cock at your entrance, resting just the tip inside you. And you sink down, oh-so-slowly.

“Fuck, fuck, fuuuuuck,” Simon hisses under his breath.

You’re pretty sure you’ve found heaven on earth because every inch of him is filling you so perfectly.

When Simon tries to bow his head again, lips skimming your cleavage, you yank his head back by his hair until he’s forced to look at you as you begin to roll your hips, gliding up and down his length.

With your free hand, you touch his chest, tracing his tattoos and scars. Resting your palm at the base of his throat, your thumb sliding up over his pulse.

He tries to thrust up into you, but you grab his chin with a fierce look.

“Did I tell you to move?” you demand with steel in your voice. “Did I give you permission to do that?”

The corner of his mouth twitches with a smirk.

Your fingers tighten, digging into his jawline.

“No,” he says. Then after a moment’s pause, he adds, “No ma’am.”

You smile, clenching around him until he grunts and his whole body jerks.

“Good boy.”

Simon’s cock surges inside you at the praise.

“Oh, look at that,” you say. “The big, mean, tough guy is obedient and eager to please.”

You swear a little flush of pink creeps up Simon’s neck and into his cheeks and it only makes him even more endearing to you.

“Uncuff me,” he replies. “And I’ll please you by fucking you into the mattress, baby girl.”

You laugh and kiss him, licking into his mouth. When you pull away, you tap your fingertip against Simon’s lips.

“Oh, no, no, no, sweetie. You’re not the boss here, remember? I’m the one using you to get off. And if you’re very good for me, I’ll let you come. Otherwise, all you get to do is sit there while I play with that beautiful cock of yours.”

You’re a soaking mess by now and you strip off your shirt and bra, barely breaking your rhythm. Planting your hands on Simon’s chest for leverage, you work yourself up and down his shaft, over and over, until the burning fire of an orgasm builds between your thighs.

You lock your fingers around the back of Simon’s head and pull him down. Before you can tell him what to do, he has one of your nipples in his mouth, sucking hard enough to make you see stars. Your body is lit up like a live wire, buzzing with electricity, trembling on the edge of release.

“That’s it, love,” Simon murmurs against your skin, peppering your tits with kisses. “Look at you, baby. Fuck. Squeezing my cock so tight. You can practice that wicked streak of yours on me all you like if it gets you this fucking wet, princess.”

You’re in a frenzy now as your orgasm starts to take over, climbing hot and fast. With your arms around Simon’s shoulders, he’s like an anchor, keeping you steady through the pleasure that washes through you.

He kisses up your neck, murmuring sweet nothings in your ear as the aftershocks wear off. You go limp, sagging against him.

When you kiss him and finally give Simon permission to come, he’s driving up into you like a man possessed, teeth gritted, face buried in your shoulder.

You cling to him, encouraging softly, “God, you’re so close, Simon. I can feel it.”

He finishes with one final, deep thrust that has you gasping against his mouth and your eyes rolling back in your head.

The two of you stay that way for a while, pressed flush against each other, exchanging lazy kisses, until he goes soft and slips out of you.

You thread your fingers through his hair, nuzzling him, before you retrieve the key from your jeans pocket and uncuff him.

Simon takes your wrist and pulls you into his arms, carrying you off to the bathroom where he washes—and kisses—every inch of you with admiration.

Masterlist

#cod #simon ghost riley #imagines #cod imagines #simon ghost riley imagines #simon ghost riley x reader #writing tag

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fatuifucker · 2 years

Text

stream clip: posting your boobs on twitter so scara can win a twitter poll

PAIRING = streamer! scaramouche x fem-sex reader (they/them pronouns used but mention of boobs)

WARNINGS = boobplay (reader receiving), not canon to sucker series storyline, scuffed writing

W/C = 0.5k

A/N = from this post, yayy congrats on scara for winning and thank you scaranation for helping! also not...very...proud of it though,, despite my love for boobs, i don't read wlw smut so i don't know how to write them :shrug: i'm sorry i'll try harder next time aaaaaaaaa

TAGS = @midnxght-sweet-time, @zen-daydreams, @edenialucas, @huboi, @nejibot, @teallapril, @lovediluc, @yumixxn (i can't tag some of you guys sorry)

scara☆lover @yn-reader

If Scara wins I'll post a pic of my boobs

[stream deja vu!! @best-streamers

round one: 06ScaraBalladeer vs KoushiWhale]

scara-sama @06ScaraBalladeer

They said it! A vote for me is a vote for free boobs!

[scara☆lover @yn-reader

If Scara wins I'll post a pic of my boobs]

—

You: Kuni

You: What did you do?

Kuniku<3: Huh what are you talking about

Kuniku<3: How far are you from home? I want my cake

You: Kuni, you know what you retweeted

Kuniku<3: Oh that…hehe, just a little encouragement to get people voting for me

Kuniku<3: Aka the most prettiest doll in the universe

Kuniku<3: You wouldn't let me lose, would you?

You: Kuni.

Kuniku<3: Besides when I win, we'll get more clout for the channel

Kuniku<3: And you said you'd do anything to help me grow, riiiight?

You: …

—

"Get a good shot. We need to thank them properly, don't you think?"

You position the phone close to your chest — showcasing your assets while concealing your face from view. Scara's signature lace gloves cup your breasts, his breath blowing into your ear as he orders you to take a picture.

"That's good enough," he says, snatching the phone from you and going on your account.

"I'm surprised you're okay with that. I thought you didn't want me to sell my body."

"It's fine, we'll deleting the post in a minute." He removes his gloves and tosses it aside. "And it's not like they'll know that you're my s/o. They'll just think I'm rewarding a fan, probably make some creepy comments, which all means more clout." He taps the post button before leaving the phone on the table and reaching over to grab a bottle of lotion. “Now that’s done…let me appreciate you too.”

Kuni squirts out a few pumps of the lotion, spreading it evenly atop his palms. The delicate scent of rain and lavender is pleasing and even therapeutic; well, you bought it for Kuni because of its calming properties. He shifts his body, spreading his legs as an invitation for you to come closer. Knowing what he intends on doing, you lean your back against his chest.

Kuni’s hands make their way to your chest and gently kneads your breasts. His thumbs dig at the flesh, the pads of his fingers putting the right amount of pressure. He hums as spreads the sticky white substance all over your mounds, and you know he’s smiling behind you.

“Poor thing, look at all this tension you’ve built up,” Kuni coos. “You’ve been working so hard for my sake, haven’t you?” His fingers circle around your areola, making you jump when he roughly pinches your nipples. “What a good little producer I have.”

Burying his face into your nape, Kuni continues to massage your tits, drinking in all your whimpers and cries. The lavender scent — that was meant to calm you down — is hypnotic, the squelchy sounds of the viscous liquid on skin adding to the muddled mess in your mind. You weakly call out his name, but the only salvation you received was a warm tongue gliding the shell of your ear. All you could do is sink into his hold, shutting your eyes as you succumb to the pleasure.

“Hehe, (Name), you truly are adorable.”

#genshin impact smut #genshin x reader smut #genshin smut #scaramouche x reader smut #genshin scaramouche x reader smut #scaramouche smut #genshin scaramouche smut #sucker au #sucker series

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mamawasatesttube · 11 months

Note

“I don’t care what anyone else thinks.” & “I won’t lose you too.” with timkon, konbart, maybe even timkonbart if you really want to :)

combined with this prompt ask from @randomexistentialemo (who tumblr is being weird about tagging, sorry!):

“Who cares about what they think?” for timkon?

Kon is quiet.

That's the first thing that stands out, when Tim slips into his room. The lights are dim enough that the slight glow of his eyes is visible, a luminous cyan against the muted yellow lamplight. The only sounds are the TV and Bart rambling over it, explaining the plot of the game he's currently playing; Kon's eyes are on the screen, but just by looking at him, Tim can tell he's not watching. Not really.

He's too quiet. Kon is a lot of things, but quiet is never one of them. Not unless something is very, very wrong.

Tim deliberately lets his feet fall audibly against the carpet as he jumps down from the windowsill. Bart's head snaps up; Kon, who presumably already knew he was there from his heartbeat alone, flicks a glance over at him, and a vague quirk of his lips, but says nothing.

Bart meets his gaze, wide-eyed with obvious worry. He jerks his head none-too-subtly at Kon and, apparently having noticed his distraction technique isn't working, mouths a desperate help.

Right. Tim's turn.

"I brought pizza," he announces, placing the box on the coffee table in front of the sofa. "And I'm hoping you didn't already polish off all the drinks in the fridge, 'cuz I didn't grab any."

The mini-fridge in the corner opens on its own, and three cans of Zesti float out. So at least Kon's feeling up to that much. That's... something.

"Thanks," Tim says, accepting the can that floats into his hand. He pops it open and plops down on the couch on Kon's other side, so that he can be a sad pile of blankets in the middle of his two best friends, at least.

God, that haunted look in his eyes... Tim knows Clark is handling the lab, now that the kryptonite is gone, and that Clark is beyond pissed at what happened to Kon, but hell if Tim doesn't wish he could go back there and punch every single unethical white coat shithead in there that schemed, plotted, and lied in order to get Supernova alone just to poison, drug, and kidnap him for a wannabe Cadmus successor's next pet project. He went in thinking they needed help, and they betrayed him, took advantage of his kindness, and—

Okay. Getting pissed again won't help anything. Yes, seeing Kon out of his mind with terror in the midst of a flashback while injured and in pain earlier was agonizing, infuriating, and horrifying. No, dwelling on it won't help make Kon feel a little better right now.

Tim takes a breath.

"I'm not too hungry," Kon says, and god, his voice is still raw. Bart clearly hears it too, because he puts down his slice of pizza and turns to wordlessly snuggle into Kon's side. "Sorry. You brought it all this way, and..."

"Kon." Tim rests a hand on his shoulder. "If you don't wanna eat, don't force yourself. That's fine. It's not like it's gonna go to waste anyway. We've got Bart right here."

That at least makes Kon smile ever-so-slightly, just for a moment. But it fades far too fast, and he sighs, hangs his head, and stares down at the Zesti clasped in both his hands.

Bart lifts his head slightly and meets Tim's gaze again. The worry in his eyes hasn't lessened; Tim is sure his own face mirrors it. He's not sure he's ever seen Kon break down like that before, in all the years they've known each other.

"...People saw, didn't they?" Kon asks, his voice carefully neutral. He doesn't lift his gaze. "Bet someone recorded it. Now everyone knows their great hero Supernova starts screaming bloody murder 'cuz of a fucking needle. Is it trending on Twitter how pathetic I am yet?"

Bart's head flies up in rage. "Who cares about what they think?" he demands. "Even if it is, I don't care what anyone else thinks! I'd have been freaking out really bad too! Grife, Kon, what they did to you was fucked up, and it's not pathetic that you're not okay!"

Tim presses a little closer into Kon's side, hoping it'll ground him. Kon has always sought out touch when he's upset. Judging by the hesitant brush of TTK against his hip, it was a good call; emboldened, Tim reaches up and strokes a hand through his hair, too. "Bart's right. And also... it's not trending or anything. There was one recording, from the security system, but I got rid of it. And Oracle is on high alert for any duplicates that might crop up. It's not getting out. I promise."

"Oh." Kon lets out a slow breath. Some of the tension in his shoulders seeps away; somehow, curled into himself between them both, despite his stature and his broad shoulders, he seems small. "That's... good."

"Yeah!" Bart agrees. "And Tim and I are on high alert to sit on you for the rest of the week. Right, Tim?"

"Right," Tim agrees. Bart fist-bumps him; it brings another tiny smile to Kon's face. This one lingers.

"Okay." Kon finally, finally lifts his head. He glances first to Bart, then to Tim, and sighs, drawing the blanket a little more tightly about himself. "So long as you guys don't mind me being pathetic."

"Pffff, as if." Bart nudges him. "Besides, you used to wear Axe. That's way more pathetic than anything you're doing right now. And I still stuck around."

Another tiny smile. Tim mentally congratulates Bart. He slips his arm around Kon's waist, leaning into his side fully, and reaches for the box of pizza. "So, what were you playing before I got here?"

Bart lights up, grabs the controller, and launches into a delighted spiel about his game. Kon goes back to watching, and Tim settles in to quietly bask in both of their presence, stalwart in his resolve to protect Kon. They'll both take care of him. God knows he's always taken care of them when they've needed it.

And Tim won't call him out on it or anything, but when a piece of pizza levitates its way out of the box toward Kon's mouth, all the same, Tim can't help but smile.

♥ angst/fluff prompts ♥

#long post #waugh. didnt mean to make it so long. but also kon had to go through the horrors you know?#his medical traumas............. the experimentation...... you know....................#anyway um. yeah. jazz hands? im not 100% happy with it but Alas It's Already So Long #timkon #timkonbart #konbart #its. its all of them in one nebulous state sorry theyre just all here #is it romo? is it qp? anyone's guess!#tim #kon #bart #rimi writes

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cornsobsessions · 1 year

Text

It's the end of 2022 so here are my favorite fics that I read this year! These weren't all written in 2022, in fact many of them were not, but I did read all of them this year.

They cover a wide range of ratings and topics so please read any of the writers tags and content warnings before reading. a * means you need to be logged in to ao3 to read.

Anything in Italics is my thoughts.

1. consider the hairpin turn (do not choose sides yet) by jjcofeesa (@30samwiches) zimbits, holsom, shardo, pimms | 50k You are not in a car with a beautiful boy. You are in a car next to a beautiful boy. And in a car behind your ex. And in a car ahead of your best friend. If you're Jack Zimmermann, current World Driver's Champion, that is. If you're Eric Bittle, you're too nervous about your rookie season to be thinking about what the boys in the other cars look like. (You tell yourself you're too nervous, anyway. You do think about it.) If you're on Twitter, well. They're all beautiful boys, and you wish you could be in the car with them. I don't know when this became a comfort fic for me but I have read it several times now and it has been wonderful every single time

2. action painting, abstract in the making by unconventionalturtle (@watermelonmountaindew) zimbits | 35k A stolen painting. A forged painting. A mysterious blonde. That's how it all begins.Jack Zimmermann thinks he’s set himself up for a nice, simple life when he quits playing hockey and gets started on his degree. But for the grad student, and night shift security guard, the summer of 2015 seems to have other plans. A fun story about the gang and you get to learn about some cool paintings along the way!

3. Defining Expectations by cricketnationrise (@cricketnationrise) nurseydex | 32k When Will joins the team at Samwell Dictionary, he doesn't know what to expect about anything other than his job description. With the help of good friends (and good pie) he might just have a shot at defining his expectations.

4. Got Your Back Means I'll Get You Out by cricketnationrise (@cricketnationrise) bitty and shitty | 17k Bitty Comes Out. Shitty Comes To Get Him. heartbreaking, wholesome, and full of platonic love

5. getting used to letting go by jennycaakes nurseydex, farmer | 37k Dex was supposed to have a fancy job in some city upon graduation, but his plans changed once his uncle died and left the family home in Maine to him. Without immediate obligations of their own, Nursey, Chowder and Farmer follow Dex up there to help him clear it out and clean it up. The way this feels so true to life is insane

6. I Don't Know What I Would Do by specklesandflowers jack and shitty | 57k The adventures of first-year Shitty Knight and Jack Zimmermann and the beauty that is their friendship I love Jack and Shitty’s friendship so much and this was so fun to read

7. The Gay Favour by FightMeImSmall nurseydex | 43k “I need a favour.” Will said intensely to the group of people assembled before him. “Okay so last year my brothers were ragging me about going to a liberal arts college and just generally being dicks. Sibling stuff, and like, that was fine. But then Christopher was like ‘found yourself a boyfriend yet?’ like as a joke and I’d had it up to here with their shit and replied, ‘so what if I have?’ So now my family think I’m gay and expect me to bring a boyfriend to this big ole reunion. If I don’t bring one they’re just going to get worse.” His friends all blinked at him, surprise evident in each of their faces. “I’ll do it.” Nursey said slowly The OCs are amazing and it was just so fun to read

8. Breathe With No Air by bluflamingo parswoops | 25k After Jack kisses Bitty on the ice, Kent's attacked one night by drunk, homophobic hockey fans. He's got no memory of the attack, but that doesn't make it any less traumatic. Fortunately, he's got his friends to get him through, in more ways than one. Pain but its also so beautiful

9. got the feeling you're the right thing after all by bisexualnursey nurseydex | 74k Two and a half years after he breaks up with Dex to go to grad school across the country, Nursey runs into him again when he visits New York for the holidays. What starts as them just rekindling their friendship quickly turns into a whole other thing: a 100% no-strings-attached friends with benefits arrangement while they’re in the same city. Which is totally chill because Nursey is definitely over Dex. He swears. He’s going back to California soon anyway.

10. (simply having) a WTF christmas time by loud_as_lions * whiskeytango, wtf | 17k All the Ford siblings are home for the holidays. Denice’s brothers are more than a little surprised when their sister brings not one, but two men home for Christmas. Logically, they assume she’s dating one of them. Which one, though? Just so much love can be felt and the OCs are wonderful

11. write our names in the wet concrete by MyCupOfTea zimbits | 20k “Oh my God, has it? Been ten years already?” The Olympics are never without their fair share of drama, scandal, and movie worthy storylines. However, the 2018 Winter Olympics remains burned into the sports world’s memory especially bright. And the sports world, despite their somewhat recent retirement, includes Eric Bittle and Jack Zimmermann. I love the way this is written

12. I've been waiting for a lifetime, for a moment just like this. by pandabob parswoops | 25k It's Jeff's last Christmas hospital visit before he retires so Kent is determined to make sure that he visits everyone, little does he know that this visit will change their lives forever.Heart wrenching and beautiful

13. Your heart hurts, mine does too by the_p_in_raspberry zimbits | 19k Shitty had always thought that because of Samwell’s LGBTQ+ friendly rumor, if one of his teammates weren’t straight they would come out eventually, only waiting because they weren’t ready yet, but never waiting because they were scared. He could see now how his logic was flawed. heartbreaking and heartwarming, all at the same time

14. From the Ground Up by Rianne kent/omc | 167k Kent has a pretty good life. It’s been a couple years since the Aces last won a cup, but he’s still at the height of his career. He has an apartment with a stunning view over Vegas, a best friend who’s always dragging him to basketball games, a cat to cuddle with, and more money than he could ever spend. Everything is fine. So it won’t be a problem at all if he strikes up a friendship with that guy he meets at the All-Star party. ---- Tomas enjoyed the years he spent in Minnesota, but he’s ready for a new life in a different city. It means he’ll be even further from his friends and family in Quebec, and he’s not sure he’s going to adapt well to the desert. But he’ll have his new job to distract him, and he’s never minded the challenge of developing a new circle of friends and acquaintances. He doesn’t expect Kent Parson to be part of that.

15. mon pays by weneedtotalkaboutsherlock (@weneedtotalkaboutfic) zimbits, shardo, farmer, zimmerparents | 41k He didn't suggest they come to the cabin because he misses home, not really. At first, it was a senior thing between Shitty and him, one last weekend together before their final semester at Samwell, before graduation, before their lives inevitably change and diverge in ways Jack doesn't want to think about too much. Shitty suggested that Lardo and Bitty should tag along, and Jack agreed. Having them at the cabin… it was a good thought. He'd have them for his own, for a few days. But then, four became six, when Holster and Ransom heard about their plans, and cherry on top, the Frogs tagged along as well after that. So much for a quiet weekend between friends. snow filled shenanigans

16. four calling birds by wit (@parvuls) zimbits, shardo | 11k "You are now listening to Shits and Bits on Hub 98FM!" In which four radio hosts and one medical emergency result in Jack and Bitty co-hosting a show the night before Christmas Eve.

17. Friend Request by WrathoftheStag (@wrathofthestag) zimbits, shardo, nurseydex, fordtango | 26k When Eric Bittle was 18, he made out with 20-year-old hockey player, Jack Zimmermann, at an Olympic after-party. 25 years later, an unexpected friend request from Jack throws Eric for a loop. What’s a guy to do?

18. Time and Hearts by rickysims katyageorge, zimbits | 16k In 2002, a figure skater from Russia and a hockey player from Canada met at the Olympics. They fell in love. Jack and Bitty know that part. What they don’t know is what happened next and why Katya and George might not want to rekindle flame that went out 20 years ago.

19. Becoming Lardo by loud_as_lions * shardo | 9k Larissa was different with these boys than she was with anyone else. She had always thought that all the talk about finding yourself in college was bullshit, but these boys were making her wonder just how much of what she had previously believed might be changed by this place. An absolutely wonderful lardo character study

20. Like Our Own Private Island by imafriendlydalek * zimbits, shardo | 85kAfter Eric loses his spot on the SMH team and Lardo graduates, they're both left floundering with few options. So when the opportunity comes up to manage a cafe on a remote island in Quebec, it seems like as good a place as any to figure out their next steps in life. Even if it does mean he'll need to brush up on his French. The last thing Eric expects to find in a place like this, reachable only by ship in the warmer months or tiny little tin-can airplanes, is a town full of people who welcome them like family. Well, everyone except one: the enigmatic, irresistible Jacques Laurent.

21. Eric Bittle, NBC 10 by foryouandbits zimbits | 82k In 2009, Jack Zimmermann was drafted 2nd overall to the Providence Falconers. After a tumultuous first season in the minors, Jack returns to the NHL and is named captain within a year. Known to the media as the "hockey robot," no one seems to be able to break through the polite barrier that Jack has built — no one until Eric Bittle, newest intern at NBC 10. Bitty, interning as a requirement for his journalism degree at nearby Samwell University, forms an instant connection with Jack. Throughout the rest of the season, and the rest of Bitty's junior year at Samwell, the two grow closer while learning how to both trust each other and succeed in their respective careers. A fun alternate meeting AU

22. thinking outrageously (I write in cursive) by bumblegremlin (@bittysthesis) pimms, zimbits | 15k Jack was glad Bitty wanted a long engagement. It gave him time to address the very large, very pressing issue at hand. Eric Bittle was Jack Zimmermann’s fiancé. Kent Parson was Jack Zimmermann’s husband. A fun and funny fic in which Kent is a little shit and so is Jack

I read so many awesome fics this year and like last year making this list was very difficult! I can't wait to see what all you write in the future (or have written in the past) that I will get to read!

#i read a lot of fics over 10k this year sorry not sorry #i am not lying when i say narrowing this list down is so hard #my 'short' list is over 60 fics long and i read many many more #i hope you all enjoy and i can't wait to read more!#fic recs #best of 2022 #omgcp #check please #omgcheckplease

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mashioca · 2 months

Text

Need Ideas~?

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Ame-Chan x AMAB!Reader

MINORS DNI

A/N: my first request! I got this request VIA Twitter. I apologize if the characterization is OOC :c

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Tags — Cunnilingus, Unprotected sex, Creampie, Degrading(?), Dubcon (only at the start),

The day was nearing its end. I have just finished modding for my streamer girlfriend, OMGKawaiiAngel. She has grown as a streamer over the past month. Her charming charisma draws in followers, and she gets super chats left and right. She sparkles in the eyes of her fans. When the camera cuts and the stream ends, she lets out her true nature. A depressed, lonely girl, desperate for attention and acceptance. She’s the girl I came to love.

“Ame, I noticed that your performance is lacking a bit. Is something up?” She looks up from her phone, her gaze landing on me.

“I dunno, P-chan~. I can’t seem to get any ideas for streams lately.” She groans, “I mean, what if my good-for-nothing nerds lose interest in me? I can’t go on like that!” Her pessimistic attitude shines through like the sun. I take a seat next to her and begin coming up with ideas for streams.

“Yeah, yeah, but y'know, P-chan..." She trails off, her gaze falling on my crotch. Her hand inches toward it, her expression twisting into one of desire and lust. "Maybe we can take a break, yeah?"

"I don-" Before I can reply to her, she shuts me up with her lips. The taste of mint and vanilla she ate earlier overloads my senses. Our tongues dance along with each other, exploring each other’s mouths before breaking away. Ame’s breathing is heavy and irregular. My pants feel tight against me. I pick Ame up and carry her towards the bed.

“Kyaa~ P-Chan~ naughty naughty~!” She teases as she playfully struggles against my arms. I gently place her on the bed and trap her hands above her head with my own. I attack her neck with kisses and licks.

“P-chan.. want more than that~.” She whines. I gently bite down on her collarbone, and she squeaks. I lick the newly formed bite mark and pull back.

“Tell me what you want, Ame.” She hesitates for a moment, a pink hue appearing on her cheeks. Her eyes show need and lust as she stares at you, silently begging.

“Want P-chan to use me." She’s quiet; her voice is not above a whisper. I smirk at her uncharacteristic shyness. ‘I’m going to Fucking break her.’

I let go of her wrists and kneeled down. My face is now inches away from her clothed sex.

“Fuck, soaked already? I barely touched you.” I lick long strips of the soaked fabric, her moans filling the otherwise silent room.

“P—P-chan.. M-More.. please." She can barely keep her eyes open. Her hand is now tangled in my scalp, so she can hump against my face. I quickly ripped off her panties, leaving her leaking sex bare. As quickly as they’re off, I shove my tongue into her hole. She tastes sweet.

“Fuck.. fuck! P-Chan.. close..” Her moans and pants get more needy and louder with each passing second. I lick circles around her throbbing clit before sucking on it. Her orgasm ripping through her in a couple sucks. Her legs locked around my head, forcing me to keep sucking and licking until she was overstimulated. Her legs finally let go, going limp on my shoulders.

“P-chan.. wan’ more." Fuck, even after all of that, she’s still needy? Her words go straight to my dick, making it throb. I quickly undo my pants and line my dick against her slit.

“Gonna fuckin’ break you and this needy pussy. Gonna get you addicted to this cock.” I grunt. I quickly bottom her out, my dick kissing her womb. A silent scream came from her lips at the sudden intrusion. As quickly as I came in, I pulled and pushed back in. Her limp body under mine, accepting everything. “Fuck, you’re tightening around my cock. Gonna fuckin’ milk me, yeah?”

“P— Cha—n.. gon’ cu~m!” Her voice shakes with each hard thrust. The knot in my stomach tightens with each needy moan she lets out.

“Gonna cum in your slutty pussy; you’re going to cum for me, yeah? Fuckin’ cum.” She clenches around my cock with these words. I reach my hand down and rub her clit. In seconds, she’s spasming and squirting around my dick. With one final thrust, my seed shoots into her. I pull out and watch as my seed spurts out of her in globs. Ame looks up at me, hearts in her eyes.

“I-I got an idea for a stream, P-chan~!"

#needy girl overdose #needy girl overload #needy streamer overload #needy streamer overdose #ame chan #p chan #18+ only #18+ content #x reader #amab reader #request #reqs open

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circusgoth-dotcom · 3 months

Text

6684 Lemon Gulch

Ship: Logan Howlett x Gabriel Reaper-Argabritt [Exes AU]

Word Count: 1396

Summary: Hot damn another long one fhfhfh (For me, anyway). When the X-Men are faced with a new threat, they will need all the help they can get. Professor X sends Wolverine to track down and try and convince Gabriel Reaper, his ex, to return after disbanding from the team many years ago. Logan is shocked to find his ex has been "domesticated" since the days they used to go steady. CWs for mentions of implied prejudice toward mutants, brief suggestiveness, alcohol consumption, smoking.

Tag List: @canongf @futurewife @rexscanonwife

Logan heaved a reluctant sigh as he stood on the doorstep of 6684 Lemon Gulch, the last known residence of Gabriel Reaper, his ex, in several senses. He didn’t know if he wanted it to be here or not. The only reason he was tracking it down was on Xavier's command. They needed all the help they could get. The neighbourhood was nice… quaint… something that didn't suit the Gabriel he had left.

What if he didn't recognize it at all? Could things really have changed all that much since Gabriel voluntarily left the X-Men? Birds twittered in the sturdy trees lining the well-paved streets. Everything was so… quiet here. It made his supersonic hearing buzz with understimulation. He raised his hand, waffling between knocking and ringing the doorbell. He chose to knock.

A young man opened the door, his expression both confused and curious as he peered at the stranger on the doorstep. “Can I help you?”

“Does Gabriel Reaper still live here?”

The man braced his palm against the doorway, leaning back into the house. “Mr. Reaper-Argabritt! There's some guy at the door asking for you!”

You've gotta be shittin’ me.

It didn’t take long for a tired-looking Gabriel to appear. “Kev, I really appreciate you, but I just put Shelley down for her nap…” They trailed off, eyes widening as their gaze fell on their old flame, their face paling slightly. “Logan.”

“Ah, geez, I’m sorry. I’ll go make sure I didn’t wake her up.” The young man rushed inside, leaving Gabriel gaping, his breathing shallow.

“Well… I… come in.” He felt light-headed as he let Logan in, closing the door behind him and leading him into his Boho Gothic living room. “Make yourself comfortable, can I get you anything?”

Logan stood awkwardly at the edge of the room, unable to make himself sit as he took everything in, his hands buried in the pockets of his jeans. “I suspect happy-go-lucky back there isn’t your partner, is he?”

“Oh-hah, Kevin? No, he’s just the nanny. He’s been a big help, especially now with Shelley…” Gabriel cleared his throat and floated over to a shelf, off which he picked up a photo of himself and another man, showing it to Logan. “Otis Argabritt. My husband.” It stung both of them to be said aloud.

“Well, at least I can rest easy knowing you’ve always had an eye for the older ones.”

Gabriel put the photo back. He wore a long, grey, loose-fitting button-down dress over a white tank top and black sweatpants, along with a pair of grey, fuzzy slippers. He looked comfortable. A band of white gold glinted on his left ring finger. They then picked up two more photos.

“This is Bram, our little boy, he’ll be four in two months, and Shelley, she’s a year old as of the first.”

“They’re beautiful, Gabriel.”

“Thank you…” They softly smiled and put the photos back. It was a sad expression.

“Does Argabritt know?”

“Please, be more specific, Logan.”

“That you’re a mutant, and that his kids’ll likely be mutants, too.”

“Oh.” Gabriel slowly sat on its couch, clearing its throat. “No. I haven’t.”

“And how long have you two been together?” Logan absently rubbed his stubble, keeping Gabriel just in his peripheral.

“Five years married.” It swallowed. “It won’t matter unless the children start displaying powers, and that’s years in the future…”

“It’s still a possibility.”

“I know. I know.” They sighed and rubbed their eyes, pushing up their glasses in the process. “How did you find me?”

“With a little help…” He inhaled deeply but subtly. It still smelled like it did when they were still together, even under all the smells that weren’t its own. “But that brings me to why I’m even here-”

“Mm, there it is. I knew this wasn’t just an instance of ‘I was in the area and wanted to check in.’” He leaned back, inviting Logan to continue with his body language.

I’d be more than happy to see you if it was on any other terms. “The professor wants you back on the team. We’re facing something we haven’t seen before… we need all the help we can get.” He reached into his jacket and pulled out a thumb drive, handing it to Gabriel. “This contains everything we know so far.”

They frowned as they examined the drive in their palm. When their lip began to tremble, they put it on their coffee table. “I can’t. I’m a father, now… I’m going to guess Xavier knew that already. I didn’t exactly tell him not to keep tabs on me.”

“How did that happen, anyway?”

This surprised Gabriel enough for them to fold their arms as they looked up at Logan. “I had sex with a man who loves me, simple as that.”

“You didn’t want kids when we were together.”

“I was also younger then and preoccupied with being a superhero, Logan. If I remember correctly, neither did you.”

He grunted… it had a point. Still, this is not where Logan saw it ending up after all these years. He stepped closer, looking directly at him for the first time since he came to the front door. All those feelings never went away, no matter what he tried to replace them with. “Besides the interior decorating, this doesn’t really seem like you, angel.”

Gabriel’s breath hitched. “Please, don’t call me that.”

“I’m sorry,” he rumbled immediately. Only Gabriel could get him to apologize so quickly. They crossed their ankles, looking down at their knees. He wished he knew what they were thinking.

“Do you want a beer?”

“Sure.”

They quickly rose from their seat and went into their kitchen, giving Logan more time to absorb what had happened to his ex in his absence. He wanted to know how exactly Otis had turned him into this “housewifey” thing. Though, of course, he didn’t want to immediately assume that Gabriel wasn’t working… but they had certainly been domesticated. He resisted the urge to go snooping, if only because it had returned with two beers and was beckoning him further into the house, leading him to a back porch.

“I know you like to smoke with your beer, so I thought we could sit outside,” it explained, settling into one of the deck chairs. Logan sat in the other.

“I hope that’s not the only impression I made on you, ange- I mean, kid- I mean, Gabriel.” He unsheathed one of his claws and popped the tab on his can, clearing his throat. They blushed as they opened their own.

“Of course not! … I also know you can be very sweet, even when you’ve convinced yourself you’re only capable of being a bitter loner who cares for no one.”

He sipped his beer, placed it in the mesh cup holder, and retrieved a cigarette from his pocket. “Only for you, kid.”

It let the pet name slide and reached over to light the cigarette, a flame sizzling from its fingertip.

“Thanks.”

“Don’t mention it… though, I’d prefer if you didn’t go back inside after this, for the baby’s sake…”

He nodded, then let a small smile tease his features. “Shelley and Bram. That’s clever.”

Gabriel cheesed. “Thank you, I knew someone would appreciate it. I don’t think Otis quite got why I chose those names, but he agreed to them.”

“How’d you two end up together?”

“I did a lot of travelling after I left the X-Men… we met in Arizona, I was photographing the state parks. Funnily enough, he also likes photography… he noticed we were trying to shoot the same thing one day and we got to talking. I guess you could say the rest is history. He bought this house as a proposal gift.”

Logan coughed into his fist. “Must be some big shot, then.”

Gabriel nodded. “CEO of something or other. Such a boring job for an interesting man. He’s into rocks and minerals, and the migrational patterns of herd animals like caribou.”

Logan could care less, but he nodded along as if he were interested. Selfishly, he hoped there was something flawed in this relationship… some chance that he and Gabriel could get back to the good old days. I miss you. I’ve missed you so much. I’m sorry that I pushed you away. If only he could express it clearly.

#self shipping #self shipping community #safeshipping #self ship au #gay self ship #trans self ship #self insert #self insert x canon #self x canon #self insert oc #oc x canon #circus scripts #❌Lend Me Your Flannel❌

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