#they were aware of it since filming like they really saw the vision from the beginning

[rosecoloreddesire]

Sugar Daddy Blues, 3

Summary: You’ve been told to stay away from strangers before but…this one sounded like a dream come true. Sending you money for school, clothes, and pictures. You were living on cloud nine and somehow Elvis Presley was gonna take you all the way there.

Warnings: Daddy Kink, Older!Elvis, Younger!Reader (by 10 years), Innocence Kink, P in V (wrap it up y’all!). 

Note: Thanks y’all for all the love on SDB! If you guys have any ideason how to further this series pls let me know! I was also writing a separate story and hope that I didn’t put the name in this lol. My DMs and requests are open! My finals for college start sometime this week! Love y’all! 

“Soooo, what happened when you left me at the entrance, Y/N?” Your skin flushed and you all but spit your drink out at the bar.

“Emily! I didn’t do nothin’! Jerry just asked me if I saw a girl's missin' purse! That’s it!” You fold your arms and a pout decorates your lips. She scoffs as she raised the tickets in her hands.

“Well, jokes on you! We’re going again tonight! They’ve got more songs to film!” Your heart skipped a beat as she placed the ticket in your palm. You hadn’t talked to Elvis since that night out of pure humiliation.

“Really?! Now, we’ve gotta go find some new clothes to wear!” You push your empty glass toward the bartender and he nods. How the hell were you gonna face the King of Rock N Roll?! You just sucked him off and went away! How was he gonna react to that? Why did you have to say it like that? 

“Well, I’m a good friend and wanted your suga’ daddy to go absolutely wild! This is just the bee's knees, Y/N!” Your best friend draws a leather dress out of a shopping bag and squeals. Your jaw all but dropped as you took the coarse fabric into your shaky hands.

“I am not wearin’ this, Em! You have lost your goddamn mind! I’d much rather ask them to dress me!” Your cheeks burned at the thought of how Elvis would react to you trying to match his all-leather get-up. Your mind ran rampant as you thought of him bending you over and proving then and there that you were his and his only. You shook your head as Emily giggled.

“C’mon! At least let me help you model it for a few pics! My aunt designed this dress and she said she needed it for a model!” You sighed but heavily agreed. You begrudgingly walk into the bathroom and pull the leather trap on. You huff as it hugs at your curves and you smile at yourself in the mirror. You look good….no! No, you can’t wear it to his special. Lord knows what he’d do or that damn manager would do!

“A lot tighter than expected but I got it on.” Emily clapped as she brought out her Polaroid camera. You pose the best you can while people in the bar are staring at you. You’re aware of the eyes but they don’t put you off but spur you on to keep posing.

“These are perfect! Now you don’t have to wear it tonight we can change real quick and call for a taxi to get there in time!” Emily grabs your arm and pulls you back into the bathroom. As you both change she helps you with her makeup. You feel an unnerving guilt bubble in your chest as Emily pats down your eyeshadow.

“I almost slept with Elvis Presley.” You freeze as Em drops the eye shadow brush in her hand. She scrambles to push her makeup away. Her hands grasp yours harshly.

“ALMOST?! Why didn’t you?! The Elvis Presley wants you,” you wince as you see the cogs turning in her head,” HE’S THAT GUY! Your suga’ daddy is Elvis?!” You shush her and place your finger on her lips. Her vision is ablaze with excitement.

“Could you scream any louder? Damn, Em! You know I’ve never done nothin’ with no one! How am I supposed to do that with Elvis?!” She continues your makeup and shakes her head. Your head swam in thoughts of every position you could think of Elvis putting you in. God, your daddy would kill you for these thoughts.

“Did you ever think of talking it out with your man? He knows you're younger than him so why wouldn’t he think you're a virgin? Maybe he’s into that?” She shrugs as she finishes your makeup and you sigh. You should’ve talked to him about it but you couldn’t get past your own pity. You brushed your clammy hands across your skirt and let your shoulders sag as she finished her hair.

“M-Maybe if I get the chance tonight I’ll talk with him. Though I doubt he’s gonna wanna talk to me after what happened.” Em took your hand and she placed a comforting hand across your cheek.

“You are burnin’ up, chick! We really gotta get him to notice you! And I know just how!” Before you can ask why she’s grinning so devilishly she pulls you along once more. You soon find yourself face to face with Jerry once again and he beams softly down at you. You nod and Emily tells you to hold her seat. You locate your seat and realize you are directly next to the stage…again. Great. 

————————-

“Where were you,” it was more of an injunction than a question,”He just started so hopefully they don’t catch us on film…What-“ Your scolding is interrupted by a further entire set. He looks magnificent as he strides in a black satin shirt and red scarf.

“Wow, he looks hot, Y/N.” She nudged your side with her elbow as you can’t tear yourself away from his stature. The filming seems to go by fast with him changing multiple times. Lights behind him glow red in the dimly lit space in his name. Chills run down your spine as you acknowledge this wasn’t a Christmas song. He went against his manager again. Though instead of being worried for him…you wanted him to keep doing this kind of thing. It made him seem more…alive. More him. His voice was blaring and controlling in the resonant space. Extras and staff stared on in awe as his emotion grew and the room filled with a sense of perseverance. A gospel scene is next and you feel awful as you feel the searing desire fill your veins. And who are you kidding? A whorehouse? He knew what he was doing at that point!

The filming ends as soon as it starts and claps erupt in the studio as he stands in absolute disarray of emotions. His life was hanging in the balance of this but you could see how much he tended to the melody of this special. Individuals are being placed back by the stage as Elvis grins. He waves you over and your skin is alight with craving at the short action.

“Did ya like it, baby? I still feel like I’m shakin’.” He allowed you to wander aside from him to his dressing room. You peek around to make sure no one was tracking you both or just observing. Your eyes dart up to where Elvis was gaping earlier and make eye contact with Elvis’ manager. His eyes bore voids through you as Elvis clutches your hand.

“I-It was great, E. Um, are you still filming today or was this just a trick by Emily and your friend?” Elvis lowers your hand and chuckles.

“I do have a little filmin’ yet to do. Though mostly it was to trick you back into my life. I was worried you weren’t ever gonna talk to me, princess.” He began to unbutton his pants as you stood there frozen.

“I-I didn’t think you’d want me. I mean we met once! I just wanted to give you an out-“ His lips are fierce against yours as his hand sifted through your H/C hair. You sigh as he jerks his fingers scarcely. His desire spills into your mouth, your fingers grip the collar of his shirt severely.

“I want you so bad that it hurts, princess. I need you to want me just as badly. God, darlin’.” His gaze never leaves your lips as his statement dangles in the air. Your fingers shake as you help unbutton his shirt. What the hell were you doing? Your fingers curled around the red scarf wrapped around his throat. 

“I want you, Elvis. Please, just- I’ll come to wherever your stayin’ after your filmin’ is done, alright?” Elvis’ face lights up and a brief kiss is laid upon your cheek.

“I’m gonna film this so quick, darlin’!”

“Don’t ruin your filmin’, Elvis!”

“C’mon!”

———————

“Soooo, bar time? Or suga’ daddy time, Y/N?” Emily fixes her pant leg as the two of you begin to walk out of the venue. Jerry is standing next to an expensive black car and waves at you fondly.

“Um, screw it! I’m gonna sleep with Elvis Presley.” You state confidently as Emily hoots and hollers.

“Well, you go have fun, chick! Call me and tell me everythin’!” You nod as you step into the car and thank Jerry. The ride is quiet but comfortable as you drive to Elvis. Jerry keeps small talk at a minimum as you feel your nerves rise within your body. Your skin feels hot as your body shakes.

“We’re here, Y/N.” Jerry helps you to the door of Elvis’ room and then excuses himself as he hears his friend’s footsteps beyond the door. Elvis is all smiles as he opens it. You follow him inside and he stops by a vanity in the corner. He takes a swig of whiskey and looks at you from the mirror.

“Look at you, princess. I think you should’ve come in this.” Your skin heated as he turned to you. He was wearing a robe once again but he had pajama pants on. Sadly. Stop it, Y/N. Polaroids fall out of his hands and scatter to the floor. You knew Emily was going to utilize those against you.

“My best friend told me her aunt needed a model. That’s all. How did you even get those?”

“Mm, I need one too. How about you model to me what you’ve got under that cute little piece you’ve got on.” He leans against the wall with a smirk as your eyes widened. You were going to kill Emily once this was over. How the hell did she even get those to Elvis?

“I-I’m not um. Wearin’ nothin' cute.”

“I think anythin' on your pretty body is cute, darlin’,” he walks towards you as you try to collect your thoughts. His large hands are warm as they gather at your waist. His skin burning through your clothes,” I want you so bad, lil' mama. Please, let me have you.” You nod as his body presses against you. Your conscience flying out the window.

“Fuck me, Elvis.”

“Who?”

“Please, daddy.”

“That’s my girl.” His hands are calloused and rough as they lay against your throat. Leading you to lie against the bed in his room. It’s adorned in silk sheets and velvety pillows. You smile up at him as your arms wrap around the nape of his neck.

“You bring these fancy things with you everywhere?” He laughs and places a chaste kiss on your lips. A playful smirk glistens on his face.

“Only when I know I’ve got a pretty lil’ thing in my sight. Now I need to have you, princess.” His lips are soft and wet as he ravages your neck. You grasp a tuft of his hair as you let out a loud cry. His teeth scrape at the sensitive spot on your neck, shivers of desire running down your spine.

“E-Elvis, I’ve never-“ he interrupts you as he slips your shirt off your body. You stutter as he bites his lip, taking you all in.

“I know, lil’ mama. I’ll be gentle. God, you look divine.” You nod and grab his shoulders holding him close.

“I-I got myself r-ready before seeing you, daddy.” Elvis’ eyes roll into the back of his head as a broken whine etches from his mouth. He lifts your skirt and rips your tights apart. His finger circled around your clit. Your thighs shake as his eyes blacken observing you plunge into lust within moments. His lips are urging against your throat, lapping at the newly made marks.

“God, with that mouth. I gotta have you right now, baby.” You nod as you writhe around the pillows. The sensation of his finger alone has you begging for him.

“Please, I need your cock, daddy. Please. I’ll be good.” His hand finds solace around your throat and he bites his lip. He finally strips down and runs his cock between your folds.

“You gotta be kiddin’! I really wanted to be nice, darlin’! Fuck-“ Elvis plunged inside of you and your breath hitched. Your heart races as you get used to being filled up all at once.

“Elvis-“

“Breathe baby. You’re doin’ so good. That’s my good girl.” His hands rest on your waist as he continues to push inside of you. Your nails take down his back and he hisses in pain. He pants as you squeeze him tighter. His cock throbs within you.

“I-I,” you take a deep breath as you try to get used to the feeling of being split open,” you’re too big, daddy.” Your legs shook against his waist as his hips bucked forward. His resolve was dissolving as your bare skin rubbed against his. Your innocence was fleeting as your stripped body drew him in.

“You’re gonna kill me, doll,” his lip tight between his teeth as he stares down at you,” Fuck, can I move, darlin’?” He huffs out a shaky soft moan as you try to adjust yourself to his size.

“Please, I wanna feel you.” A deep growl thunders deep in his chest as he desperately clutches at your waist.

“I gotta have you now, princess.” His eyes are dark and commanding as he thrusts forward harshly. Your back arches and he compels you back down onto the delicate sheets. Your skin is burning against his as he lays his body against yours. His hips are furious among yours as he pumps his cock in and out of you. Watching as your pussy swallows his whole cock, your name drips off his lips as he cries out.

“Fuck! Elvis, you feel so good,” you grasp at his back, your manicured nails raking down his back. Hissing, Elvis bites your shoulder as his pace picks up,” please, more, daddy-“ his voice is deep, layered in need as he howls into your collarbone. His intoxicating need is being smudged in purple across your chest. His eyes never leave your body as he commits every single curve and every dip. You were made to be his sugar baby. Made to be his everything.

“You are gorgeous, Y/N. You’re mine. My baby. My baby to spoil, right?” He accented his words with deep, harsh thrusts. You yelp as he flips the two of you over. Your body is on full display over the top of him now. His hands gripping your ass as you whine at the new angle of his cock. Your walls flutter around his cock as the desire in your core tightens.

“Yes, yours. All yours, daddy. Please, I wanna cum.” He nods as he slips his thumb to rub your clit. His eyes never leave your bouncing tits as you chase your neverending high on his dick. You roll your hips hungrily wanting to be marked as his as deep as possible. His thumb circled your desperate clit rapidly.

“Oh, baby. That’s it. My pretty little pussy. Such a good girl for daddy.” That’s it. Your body quivers with warmth and pleasure as you throw your head back. His hands wrap around your waist trying to keep you grounded. Your body convulsed as your orgasm seeps through you. A cry rips from your throat as he arranges his legs beneath you to pound into your dripping cunt. His legs shuddered underneath you as if he didn’t want this moment to end. His hand envelops your throat, you hold his arm as you try to anchor yourself. Another orgasm rips through you as quickly as it came. Your body shakes above his, grabbing you he brings you closer to his chest. Your bodies rubbing against each other.

“Please. Please. Cum inside me. I want it!” Continuous babbling falls from your lips as drool begins to pool on your skin. Elvis groans and his hips begin to stutter as his release begins. He’s grasping at your body like you’ll leave the minute he comes to. His teeth gnashing and gnawing on any expanse of your body that isn’t bruised and red. His hips continue to pump slowly in and out of you as his clarity slowly returns.

“That was not the way I planned our first time together, darlin’. God, you're still so wet. I’m sorry-“ you cut him off with a quick kiss on his nose.

“Well, you can show me for our second time together, Elvis.” You wink as you let his length slip out of you. He winces at the overstimulation and grabs a towel on the bedside table. He cleans you off softly, as he bites his lip. His seed poured out of you onto his sheets. You cover your face as he tickles you. Your giggles filling the space.

“Mm, I’m gonna stay your sugar daddy?”

“Have you found a reason not to spoil me?”

“I can’t say I have.”

“Then no! Thank you, Mister Presley.”

“Mm, Round 2?”

“I thought you’d never ask, Elvis.”

Sugar Daddy Blues Taglist: @austinbutlersgirlfriend @marriedtoeddie @el-velvis @kaitaesupremacy @eliseinmemphis @suspiciousmidge @godlypresley

#elvis presley #elvis smut #austin butler elvis #elvis fluff #elvis blurb #elvis x reader #elvis 2022 #elvis #elvis presley x reader #sugar daddy elvis #rosecoloreddesire #elvis presley fic

[iu-jjang]

[INTERVIEW] 230222 IU for Harper's Bazaar Korea March 2023 Issue

IU and LEE JI EUN,

This generation’s icon IU, who cannot be defined in a single word, and the bare-faced Lee Ji Eun.

Q1: Today’s photoshoot intended to capture the duplicity of your two sides, IU and Lee Jieun. You looked relaxed during the shoot, but once it was over, you confessed that today’s shoot was actually quite tough.

IU: Honestly, it’s always tough to work on Gucci projects. It’s probably because there are a lot of experimental outfits, scenes and messages. In particular, the goal for today was to visually represent my alter ego. When I saw the 2023 S/S collection in Milan, I thought it was really shocking and interesting. With those memories in mind, upon hearing that the motif of today’s photoshoot was based on the collection, I thought to myself ah, it’s not going to be easy. But it turned out to be really fun too. It’s my first time having such thick smoky makeup and I’m grateful for the chance to be part of this refreshing experience from the photoshoot composition to the props and the studio design.

Q2: The last cut was a scene of an IU with thick smoky makeup, standing in front of a wall filled with a picture of an almost makeup-free Lee Jieun. Honestly, I didn’t know the photo on the wall was taken today and thought it was a still cut taken from ‘Love Set’ in the film, ‘Persona’. I’m aware that you show many different faces of yourself, but I also realized that you show faces of different time periods too.

IU: My staff said something similar in the waiting room just now too. I have smoky makeup on right now, but just now, we had as little makeup on as possible and since it’s early in the morning, my face was swollen like I had baby fats (laughs) which seemed to go with the concept. Seeing the printed picture, I thought of the past too.

Q3: You’ve been in a partnership with Gucci for a while. I think judging from IU’s personality as an artist, it would not have been possible if you did not agree with the philosophy and values of the brand. In terms of artistic vision, how are Gucci and IU aligned?

IU: I think Gucci is a brand that places emphasis on diversity and finds aesthetic in things that are unrefined. If I were to pick a characteristic that is similar to myself, I think this would be it. When I write lyrics, I tend to infuse thoughts and emotions that have not reached a conclusion or that come to my mind during an incomplete process.

Q4: As you said earlier, you have always been honest about yourself at each moment, and that alone is brave. As an artist, aren’t you obsessed with the idea of displaying only your perfectly crafted side to the public?

IU: When I was young, I didn’t really know any of that. (laughs) I think I had no choice but to say, “This is what I think right now”, “I’m at this age now” due to my personality, that is having to say what’s on my mind. On the other hand, I have always known that I am not nearly as perfect (person) as a sculpture. And that isn’t something that I can simply achieve by imitating. As long as I chose this profession as my career, (I know) this was my own battle that I had to come out winning or losing, and there is also a side of me that wants to make no bones about showing myself. What started out like that has now established itself as one of the ways of expressing myself.

Q5: So the piecemeal activities you’ve done recently can be understood along those lines? You lent your voice to MIRAL School’s song sung by their teachers for the students. The composer of ‘Through the Night’, Kim Jehwi made the song based on what he felt while working at the school, and you participated in the song as a featuring artist.

IU: Musical talent aside, Jehwi is my precious friend too. Frankly speaking, when he first told me that he’d be teaching the students in school, I was worried about whether he could do well more than anything else. But being affable, he adapted well and eventually said, “Noona, I want to make a song as a gift for the school”, which made me so proud and want to cheer him on too. To be honest, I didn’t expect this to make such news, but I poured so much effort into recording the song that I somehow joked, “I think I work harder on this than I do for my album”. (I worked so hard on this) so that the students can gain strength, and go to school happily while listening to it.

Q6: The drama “You Have Worked Hard” (literal title) has created a buzz with the combination of IU, Park Bo Gum, and writer Im Sang Chun of ‘Fight for My Way’, and will soon begin its pre-production. What is your reason for choosing this work?

IU: I think everyone will think this way when the drama is released, “Ah, even I would have wanted to do it too.” I really enjoyed the previous works of writer Im Sang Chun, and this one seemed to carry a new story of its own so it was refreshing. It’s just words (writing), but they manage to make people feel such emotions, so much that as someone who likes to read and write, I was envious of the writer’s talent. The theme of the drama is good, but I especially liked that it’s a heavy story delivered in a way that’s not too heavy.

Q7: Your character, Ae Soon is a ‘young girl of literary interest who isn’t well off but remains positive and ambitious, and whose voice trembles like a goat whenever she rebels’. It is noteworthy that “You Have Worked Hard” will be your first korean drama comeback in four years since “Hotel Del Luna”, and that the character is the total opposite of your previous role, Jang Man Wol.

IU: Man Wol in “Hotel Del Luna” is certainly an unusual character. However, Ae Soon has a unique point too. Ae Soon may seem like the type of person you can easily see around you, but should I say that if you look closely, you’ll find her individuality as a human being stands out? I think I’m attracted to people of that sort (gyeol: personality, belief, preference, etc).

Q8: Some actors look for traces of themselves in the role they are assigned to in order to immerse themselves into their character. Are you one of them? How similar is IU with Ae Soon?

IU: There are definitely characters with gyeol (personality, belief, preference, etc) that I can never comprehend, but if that is the case, I won’t be able to bring myself to choose the work (willingly). It’s a matter of confidence. This also proves that all the characters I have played so far have been those that I could understand at some point. Among them, Ae Soon resembles me more than any other character I have portrayed. The writer has incredible observation skills. They said they wanted to incorporate the characteristics that I have that are not too obvious into the character. It was to the point where I said, “Oh my, how did you know that I have this side to me?” after reading the script.

Q9: From “My Mister” to “Hotel Del Luna”, and from “Shades of the Heart” to “Broker” and then “Dream”. Whether it’s a drama or film, should I say that your next step is always super bold? To the extent that one may think playing a different work and a different character from your previous work is your first and main criteria for selecting a project.

IU: Just like how when you have long hair for a long time, don’t you want to dye your hair or get a haircut at some point? It may not be my criteria, but I think once I have lived as a character for more than a few months, I’d unconsciously want to try out something different too.

Q10: There are many people who want to try a bob or short haircut, but they end up sticking to their long hair for the rest of their lives just in case the former doesn’t suit them.

IU: But if there’s something I want to do, I’m the type of person who must (and will) do it first (before I worry about it). It’s much easier for me to bear regretting doing something than regretting not doing it.

Q11: I suppose you are not the type of person that separates your actress’s ego from your singer’s. How similar or different are your state of mind the day before the concert and the day before crank-in (starting to shoot a drama/film)?

IU: If a concert stage is like a (one-off) live broadcast where you only get a chance to put out a (perfect) performance that stays forever in the audience’s memory, then the filming set has a different premise in that you can exchange opinions with the director or your co-stars on the spot, select the best outcome from several take opportunities, and subsequently share it with the audience. However, once the concert begins, the overwhelming moment of finally becoming one with the audience after feeling all alone under a lot of tension for some time is very similar to the moment I realize that I am truly working and keeping in tune with the crew after seeing these many people (including myself) gradually moving forward as a team with a shared goal on a new and unfamiliar set. Both fields are attractive in that they are things that I can never do alone. Whether I'm singing or acting, I'm just someone who puts in the best of my share (of work) at every moment.

Q12: At the 14th anniversary concert <The Golden Hour: Under The Orange Sun> last year, you said, “I thought this concert might be the final destination of the things I dreamt of and wanted to challenge myself to since my teenage years, but at this moment, I’m hopeful that this could be a new starting point, a new beginning (for me).” Normally, settling down is always the easier option wherever you are. And yet, you are still constantly trying to head somewhere else. Which direction are you headed? What lies at your ultimate destination?

IU: It is no exaggeration to say that I lived my twenties obsessing over the idea of ‘direction’. Should I say it was the subject that kept me ‘hot-blooded (passionate)’ at that time? Those ardent worries were enjoyable, but honestly draining too. After turning 30, I don’t have any particular direction in mind. It’s my first time being like this too.

Q13: Are you wandering around (floating/drifting) right now?

IU: That expression is accurate. I’m wandering around (floating/drifting). This itself could be my present direction now that I’m in my 30s. Throughout last year, I kept thinking, “I want to maintain this mindset” and “I enjoy living like this.” On the other hand, apart from feeling at peace, it was also a year where interesting events exploded. I used to cling to the idea that ‘If I miss something, the world will always give me something else in return’ throughout my 20s. But once I let go of the things I was clutching onto for dear life, the ‘other thing’ the world gave me was surprisingly such events. As I emptied my mind, the world filled it with fun stuff instead. Later when I look back as I get older, I will surely put a bookmark at my 30s (chapter).

Q14: Looking back, you were always doing something for the past 14 years, like singing, holding showcases, communicating with fans, etc. So what is rest for you?

IU: To be honest, I can’t quite grasp the concept of rest. I don’t feel particularly recharged just because my body is resting. In a broad sense, if getting rest is considered a means to de-stress and recharge one’s body, then ironically for me, the things (stress) that have piled up inside me are relieved in the most refreshing way when I’m working. (I feel relieved) when I have satisfactorily accomplished my work to the point where I get a good sense of pleasure. I feel much more refreshed during those times than when I’m just lying down at home for days. Otherwise, there should be something engrossing enough for me to not think about work at all. But in my case, there isn't much stuff that I’m into to that extent. Some of the (fun) stuff that I can recall now are: when I’m in a deep sleep, when I’m catching up with Yoo Inna, when I’m making silly jokes and laughing with my friends or lover who deeply understand me, when I’m rewatching my favorite movie, and when I’m having something really delicious. As I live, there are quite many people who do not need so much of that sort of mental relaxation like me. That said, stamina is another story, so as I enter my 30s, I try hard to take care of my body to make sure that it can keep up when I need to work harder. When I get to rest, I spend time lying down as much as I can. (laughs).

Q15: During the concert, you also said, “I’ll reflect on what I experienced today and go on for another 14 years.” Have you ever imagined yourself 14 years from now?

IU: Based on last year’s calculations, if I were to picture myself as a 44-year-old… I think I’d still be working by then. Other than that, I honestly have no idea too… that is, if we (were to imagine it) based on the premise that ‘I am a person who can change’. For instance, the mindset that constitutes me 14 years from now will be very different from my current mindset.

Q16: Maybe change can happen because people are flexible. But if I am to be honest, I’m the type of person who believes that people do not change until they die.

IU: I do agree with your statement to a certain extent. But I used to be someone who despised competition and (thus) kept myself from competing 14 years ago. Going through my diary back then, I wrote “I find this competitive society so exhausting. I’m worried (about myself) because I don’t have a desire to win, and I hate competition.” But looking back, I realized that I’ve been enjoying competitions throughout the last 14 years since my debut. To the point where I wondered, “maybe I’m actually crazy about competing (for victory/defeat)?” I thought perhaps I failed to notice that I was a competitive person or I just wanted to deny it on purpose.

Q17: Either way, I feel sorry for the young girl who had just debuted and scribbled “I hate competition” in her diary. Is there anything that IU, who(se mindset) has changed quite a bit, would like to say to the IU of that time?

IU: “You actually like yourself a lot.”

Q18: You once said, “Even if we’re sick of this world, I hope we will live on while loving each other.” In this harsh world, is love still the hope that you have faith in?

IU: It’s a bit embarrassing to say this, but nevertheless, I believe that love overcomes hatred. In the end, love wins. Even when I lose my balance and I’m swayed, I repeat to myself, “But love will win in the end though” and either try to put together my logic, build up my thinking muscle or control my mind like that. The proposition that love will win is something that I’ve experienced enough through living my life. I will continue to believe it moving forward.

Q19: Singer-songwriters are blessed in that they can turn their personal thoughts and emotions into the end-product that is music. In particular, we sort of know how important lyrics are in your music. What lyrics have been running through your mind these days?

IU: This may sound ridiculous but I happened to be writing about something we just talked about earlier. I was surprised deep down when I heard the word ‘wandering’. To wander around (float/ drift) without a destination. I think this will be the theme of my next album.

Q20: Back to today’s pictorial concept of ‘duality’, I feel that you are leading your life with both egos — icon IU and ordinary person Lee Jieun — faithfully. How do you maintain a balance between these two?

IU: Changing between slightly uncomfortable yet pretty clothes that make me shine and slightly average yet comfortable clothes I can freely move around in, and being moderately satisfied and moderately wary at every moment seem to be the way to balance… whilst naturally accepting the obvious fact that there are times I shine and times I’m just ordinary.

Q21: “I can’t take out all the words from my diary, but…” (lyrics from Through the Night) — What is the one sentence that can describe you right now?

IU: (I can’t take out all the words from my diary, but) that child / she has decided to live as a spore (홀씨), instead of a flower.

[*T/L note: Although IU didn’t specifically mention dandelion (민들레), ‘홀씨’ is often used when talking about ‘민들레’ (dandelion). Referring to what she said earlier about ‘wandering around (floating/drifting)’,‘홀씨’ can be interpreted as ‘민들레 홀씨’ (dandelion puffs) too.]

Source: https://www.harpersbazaar.co.kr/article/75198

Translated by IUteamstarcandy with love

#IU #interview #bazaar #March 2023

[chaosandwolves]

Ok ok ok.

I know I'm late but..

I have to go meta again cause that one scene made me shout at the TV.

So let's dive in:

-

We have Carla and Eddie and Chris.

We have Chris trying on the suit. The last time we saw him doing it was in the store where Eddie panicked when Ana was referred to as Chris' mum. The moment that clearly set off Eddie's journey to finally make a decision for himself and break things off with Ana.

This is already a big reference, especially cause Eddie mentions "the last time" Chris was wearing the suit.

You're directly reminded of that scene.

Then Carla and Eddie leave Chris and go to the kitchen (where Ana and Eddie broke up) and talk further. The conversation is about Chris, sure, but also about Eddie.

And we have Carla yet again saying something big, something that's clearly meaningful.

I don't think I have to elaborate on what that dream could be for Eddie...

-

And then this is the next scene:

Chim and Buck carrying in Jee's new bed.

Again, a scene cuts from Eddie to Buck after something meaningful.

And in which way!

Buck in the context of being an uncle, Buck in the context of a kid - after he's donated his sperm.

This CAN'T be a coincidence. Not again and again and again.

What Carla says also applies to Chim and Jee's room situation and might apply to Buck as well.

We see that the room situation doesn't really work out. The fantasy was better than the reality...at least partially. But Chim brings back the words "dream(house)" and "fantasy" and lifts the situation through that into something nice.

So in this case, fantasy and reality kind of mix and it all turns into something positive in that moment.

Now, what does that mean for Buck?

This HAS to relate to Buck's sperm donation. We haven't seen Buck interact with Jee in ages and now he's taking care of her and helping to create a space for her.

Maybe the fantasy Buck had of helping others with their dream will turn out to have been better than the reality in the end.

And what about the "talking about your dreams make it seem too real."?

Eddie's expression is so prominent here

and absolutely reminds of his reaction the last time Carla said something impactful to him "make sure to follow your heart".

Ultimately, back then Eddie's fantasy turned out to be better than the reality as well.

-

There are just too many references in this little scene, in these two sentences, for them not to mean something. We were right last time when we all knew Carla's words were big.

It's set up the same way again. Her words clearly affect Eddie on a deeper level.

Now, of course I'm gonna make this more about Buddie.

We don't only have the scenes cutting from this to Buck, but also that sentence.

Of course the first thing that came to my mind was: That's why Eddie hasn't said anything about his feelings towards Buck because it's too real.

But also... We haven't had a talk between Buck and Eddie since the very significant one in the first ep where they were talking about Buck's love life. And we haven't had a talk about the whole sperm donor thing.

Maybe both of them are too nervous to actually talk about it cause that would make it real.

Idk idk but you can't tell me that this isn't all on purpose. There are just too many references and the absolute lack of Buddie scenes is so suspicious.

-

The film makers are all too aware of how big of a thing Buddie is within the fandom. They know what will make us scream and what will make us read Buddie into it. They're pros. They're not some amateurs.

There are too many things going on that are very suspicious.

You just can't convince me that it's not at the very least, precisely placed.

And as a bonus we have Eddie saying that as a parent you have all these visions for your kid, just like his parents had for him.

But Eddie is fine with letting go of them and imo he's also fine to let go of what remains of the expectations his parents have had for him.

-

This is my Buddie meta rant for this episode. I swear, these two sentences and Eddie's expression and Buck's storyline... It's all connected.

#Buddie #eddie diaz #Evan buckley #911 on fox #jee yun buckley han #Uncle Buck #Season 6 episode 8 #S6 ep8 #Buddie meta #Buddie rant #Chaos' Buddie meta

[iuteamstarcandy]

[INTERVIEW] 230222 IU for Harper's Bazaar Korea March 2023 Issue

IU and LEE JI EUN,

This generation’s icon IU, who cannot be defined in a single word, and the bare-faced Lee Ji Eun.

Q1: Today’s photoshoot intended to capture the duplicity of your two sides, IU and Lee Jieun. You looked relaxed during the shoot, but once it was over, you confessed that today’s shoot was actually quite tough.

IU: Honestly, it’s always tough to work on Gucci projects. It’s probably because there are a lot of experimental outfits, scenes and messages. In particular, the goal for today was to visually represent my alter ego. When I saw the 2023 S/S collection in Milan, I thought it was really shocking and interesting. With those memories in mind, upon hearing that the motif of today’s photoshoot was based on the collection, I thought to myself ah, it’s not going to be easy. But it turned out to be really fun too. It’s my first time having such thick smoky makeup and I’m grateful for the chance to be part of this refreshing experience from the photoshoot composition to the props and the studio design.

Q2: The last cut was a scene of an IU with thick smoky makeup, standing in front of a wall filled with a picture of an almost makeup-free Lee Jieun. Honestly, I didn’t know the photo on the wall was taken today and thought it was a still cut taken from ‘Love Set’ in the film, ‘Persona’. I’m aware that you show many different faces of yourself, but I also realized that you show faces of different time periods too.

IU: My staff said something similar in the waiting room just now too. I have smoky makeup on right now, but just now, we had as little makeup on as possible and since it’s early in the morning, my face was swollen like I had baby fats (laughs) which seemed to go with the concept. Seeing the printed picture, I thought of the past too.

Q3: You’ve been in a partnership with Gucci for a while. I think judging from IU’s personality as an artist, it would not have been possible if you did not agree with the philosophy and values of the brand. In terms of artistic vision, how are Gucci and IU aligned?

IU: I think Gucci is a brand that places emphasis on diversity and finds aesthetic in things that are unrefined. If I were to pick a characteristic that is similar to myself, I think this would be it. When I write lyrics, I tend to infuse thoughts and emotions that have not reached a conclusion or that come to my mind during an incomplete process.

Q4: As you said earlier, you have always been honest about yourself at each moment, and that alone is brave. As an artist, aren’t you obsessed with the idea of displaying only your perfectly crafted side to the public?

IU: When I was young, I didn’t really know any of that. (laughs) I think I had no choice but to say, “This is what I think right now”, “I’m at this age now” due to my personality, that is having to say what’s on my mind. On the other hand, I have always known that I am not nearly as perfect (person) as a sculpture. And that isn’t something that I can simply achieve by imitating. As long as I chose this profession as my career, (I know) this was my own battle that I had to come out winning or losing, and there is also a side of me that wants to make no bones about showing myself. What started out like that has now established itself as one of the ways of expressing myself.

Q5: So the piecemeal activities you’ve done recently can be understood along those lines? You lent your voice to MIRAL School’s song sung by their teachers for the students. The composer of ‘Through the Night’, Kim Jehwi made the song based on what he felt while working at the school, and you participated in the song as a featuring artist.

IU: Musical talent aside, Jehwi is my precious friend too. Frankly speaking, when he first told me that he’d be teaching the students in school, I was worried about whether he could do well more than anything else. But being affable, he adapted well and eventually said, “Noona, I want to make a song as a gift for the school”, which made me so proud and want to cheer him on too. To be honest, I didn’t expect this to make such news, but I poured so much effort into recording the song that I somehow joked, “I think I work harder on this than I do for my album”. (I worked so hard on this) so that the students can gain strength, and go to school happily while listening to it.

Q6: The drama “You Have Worked Hard” (literal title) has created a buzz with the combination of IU, Park Bo Gum, and writer Im Sang Chun of ‘Fight for My Way’, and will soon begin its pre-production. What is your reason for choosing this work?

IU: I think everyone will think this way when the drama is released, “Ah, even I would have wanted to do it too.” I really enjoyed the previous works of writer Im Sang Chun, and this one seemed to carry a new story of its own so it was refreshing. It’s just words (writing), but they manage to make people feel such emotions, so much that as someone who likes to read and write, I was envious of the writer’s talent. The theme of the drama is good, but I especially liked that it’s a heavy story delivered in a way that’s not too heavy.

Q7: You character, Ae Soon is a ‘young girl of literary interest who isn’t well off but remains positive and ambitious, and whose voice trembles like a goat whenever she rebels’. It is noteworthy that “You Have Worked Hard” will be your first korean drama comeback in four years since “Hotel Del Luna”, and that the character is the total opposite of your previous role, Jang Man Wol.

IU: Man Wol in “Hotel Del Luna” is certainly an unusual character. However, Ae Soon has a unique point too. Ae Soon may seem like the type of person you can easily see around you, but should I say that if you look closely, you’ll find her individuality as a human being stands out? I think I’m attracted to people of that sort (gyeol: personality, belief, preference, etc).

Q8: Some actors look for traces of themselves in the role they are assigned to in order to immerse themselves into their character. Are you one of them? How similar is IU with Ae Soon?

IU: There are definitely characters with gyeol (personality, belief, preference, etc) that I can never comprehend, but if that is the case, I won’t be able to bring myself to choose the work (willingly). It’s a matter of confidence. This also proves that all the characters I have played so far have been those that I could understand at some point. Among them, Ae Soon resembles me more than any other character I have portrayed. The writer has incredible observation skills. They said they wanted to incorporate the characteristics that I have that are not too obvious into the character. It was to the point where I said, “Oh my, how did you know that I have this side to me?” after reading the script.

Q9: From “My Mister” to “Hotel Del Luna”, and from “Shades of the Heart” to “Broker” and then “Dream”. Whether it’s a drama or film, should I say that your next step is always super bold? To the extent that one may think playing a different work and a different character from your previous work is your first and main criteria for selecting a project.

IU: Just like how when you have long hair for a long time, don’t you want to dye your hair or get a haircut at some point? It may not be my criteria, but I think once I have lived as a character for more than a few months, I’d unconsciously want to try out something different too.

Q10: There are many people who want to try a bob or short haircut, but they end up sticking to their long hair for the rest of their lives just in case the former doesn’t suit them.

IU: But if there’s something I want to do, I’m the type of person who must (and will) do it first (before I worry about it). It’s much easier for me to bear regretting doing something than regretting not doing it.

Q11: I suppose you are not the type of person that separates your actress’s ego from your singer’s. How similar or different are your state of mind the day before the concert and the day before crank-in (starting to shoot a drama/film)?

IU: If a concert stage is like a (one-off) live broadcast where you only get a chance to put out a (perfect) performance that stays forever in the audience’s memory, then the filming set has a different premise in that you can exchange opinions with the director or your co-stars on the spot, select the best outcome from several take opportunities, and subsequently share it with the audience. However, once the concert begins, the overwhelming moment of finally becoming one with the audience after feeling all alone under a lot of tension for some time is very similar to the moment I realize that I am truly working and keeping in tune with the crew after seeing these many people (including myself) gradually moving forward as a team with a shared goal on a new and unfamiliar set. Both fields are attractive in that they are things that I can never do alone. Whether I'm singing or acting, I'm just someone who puts in the best of my share (of work) at every moment.

Q12: At the 14th anniversary concert <The Golden Hour: Under The Orange Sun> last year, you said, “I thought this concert might be the final destination of the things I dreamt of and wanted to challenge myself to since my teenage years, but at this moment, I’m hopeful that this could be a new starting point, a new beginning (for me).” Normally, settling down is always the easier option wherever you are. And yet, you are still constantly trying to head somewhere else. Which direction are you headed? What lies at your ultimate destination?

IU: It is no exaggeration to say that I lived my twenties obsessing over the idea of ‘direction’. Should I say it was the subject that kept me ‘hot-blooded (passionate)’ at that time? Those ardent worries were enjoyable, but honestly draining too. After turning 30, I don’t have any particular direction in mind. It’s my first time being like this too.

Q13: Are you wandering around (floating/drifting) right now?

IU: That expression is accurate. I’m wandering around (floating/drifting). This itself could be my present direction now that I’m in my 30s. Throughout last year, I kept thinking, “I want to maintain this mindset” and “I enjoy living like this.” On the other hand, apart from feeling at peace, it was also a year where interesting events exploded. I used to cling to the idea that ‘If I miss something, the world will always give me something else in return’ throughout my 20s. But once I let go of the things I was clutching onto for dear life, the ‘other thing’ the world gave me was surprisingly such events. As I emptied my mind, the world filled it with fun stuff instead. Later when I look back as I get older, I will surely put a bookmark at my 30s (chapter).

Q14: Looking back, you were always doing something for the past 14 years, like singing, holding showcases, communicating with fans, etc. So what is rest for you?

IU: To be honest, I can’t quite grasp the concept of rest. I don’t feel particularly recharged just because my body is resting. In a broad sense, if getting rest is considered a means to de-stress and recharge one’s body, then ironically for me, the things (stress) that have piled up inside me are relieved in the most refreshing way when I’m working. (I feel relieved) when I have satisfactorily accomplished my work to the point where I get a good sense of pleasure. I feel much more refreshed during those times than when I’m just lying down at home for days. Otherwise, there should be something engrossing enough for me to not think about work at all. But in my case, there isn't much stuff that I’m into to that extent. Some of the (fun) stuff that I can recall now are: when I’m in a deep sleep, when I’m catching up with Yoo Inna, when I’m making silly jokes and laughing with my friends or lover who deeply understand me, when I’m rewatching my favorite movie, and when I’m having something really delicious. As I live, there are quite many people who do not need so much of that sort of mental relaxation like me. That said, stamina is another story, so as I enter my 30s, I try hard to take care of my body to make sure that it can keep up when I need to work harder. When I get to rest, I spend time lying down as much as I can. (laughs).

Q15: During the concert, you also said, “I’ll reflect on what I experienced today and go on for another 14 years.” Have you ever imagined yourself 14 years from now?

IU: Based on last year’s calculation, if I were to picture myself as a 44-year-old… I think I’d still be working by then. Other than that, I honestly have no idea too… that is, if we (were to imagine it) based on the premise that ‘I am a person who can change’. For instance, the mindset that constitutes me 14 years from now will be very different from my current mindset.

Q16: Maybe change can happen because people are flexible. But if I am to be honest, I’m the type of person who believes that people do not change until they die.

IU: I do agree with your statement to a certain extent. But I used to someone who despised competition and (thus) kept myself from competing 14 years ago. Going through my diary back then, I wrote “I find this competitive society so exhausting. I’m worried (about myself) because I don’t have a desire to win, and I hate competition.” But looking back, I realized that I’ve been enjoying competitions throughout the last 14 years since my debut. To the point where I wondered, “maybe I’m actually crazy about competing (for victory/defeat)?” I thought perhaps I failed to notice that I was a competitive person or I just wanted to deny it on purpose.

Q17: Either way, I feel sorry for the young girl who had just debuted and scribbled “I hate competition” in her diary. Is there anything that IU, who(se mindset) has changed quite a bit, would like to say to the IU of that time?

IU: “You actually like yourself a lot.”

Q18: You once said, “Even if we’re sick of this world, I hope we will live on while loving each other.” In this harsh world, is love still the hope that you have faith in?

IU: It’s a bit embarrassing to say this but nevertheless, I believe that love overcomes hatred. In the end, love wins. Even when I lose my balance and I’m swayed, I repeat to myself, “But love will win in the end though” and either try to put together my logic, build up my thinking muscle or control my mind like that. The proposition that love will win is something that I’ve experienced enough through living my life. I will continue to believe it moving forward.

Q19: Singer-songwriters are blessed in that they can turn their personal thoughts and emotions into the end-product that is music. In particular, we sort of know how important lyrics are in your music. What lyrics have been running through your mind these days?

IU: This may sound ridiculous but I happen to be writing about something we just talked about earlier. I was surprised deep down when I heard the word ‘wandering’. To wander around (float/ drift) without a destination. I think this will be the theme of my next album.

Q20: Back to today’s pictorial concept of ‘duality’, I feel that you are leading your life with both egos — icon IU and ordinary person Lee Jieun — faithfully. How do you maintain a balance between these two?

IU: Changing between slightly uncomfortable yet pretty clothes that make me shine and slightly average yet comfortable clothes I can freely move around in, and being moderately satisfied and moderately wary at every moment seem to be the way to balance… whilst naturally accepting the obvious fact that there are times I shine and times I’m just ordinary.

Q21: “I can’t take out all the words from my diary, but…” (lyrics from Through the Night) — What is the one sentence that can describe you right now?

IU: (I can’t take out all the words from my diary, but) that child / she has decided to live as a spore (홀씨), instead of a flower.

[*T/L note: Although IU didn’t specifically mention dandelion (민들레), ‘홀씨’ is often used when talking about ‘민들레’ (dandelion). Referring to what she said earlier about ‘wandering around (floating/drifting)’,‘홀씨’ can be interpreted as ‘민들레 홀씨’ (dandelion puffs) too.]

Source: https://www.harpersbazaar.co.kr/article/75198

Translated by IUteamstarcandy with love

#IU #harper’s bazaar #interview

[youlikefanficdontyousquidward]

Teeth for hire

Summary: Blade takes you and Jack on his hunt for your sire. Cameos galore and a jealous Jack :3c

Warnings: Bad touch, mentions of blood, canon typical violence

Still using my own vampire mythology mixed with the blade one. So fangs, silver, stakes, speed, strength but sunlight just makes them very weak. Also some of Jack's comic abilities since I have no proof he can't do that in the film canon and I make the rules.

First/Next

Part 2

London was uncharacteristically sunny when you arrived. Despite the chill that clung in the air the sky was cloudless. You adjusted your hat and slipped your sunglasses on. Whilst sun wouldn't make you burst into flames it was still rather uncomfortable to be out in. Like walking around trying to operate with the worst flu of your life.

You'd been around Jack like this before at least and he'd thankfully taken your arm in his. First morning he'd been in a panic, flinging a sheet over your head when you wandered into the sunny kitchen. It was sweet and you'd laughed it off, explaining how weakened you were but that you'd be okay. He now lead you through the streets after Blade, aware of the vision loss those rays were causing.

"How come he's fine?" Jack whispered to you. You saw the way Eric's head shifted ahead of you. You'd have to explain the sensitive hearing at a later date.

"He's the daywalker, half vampire. Immune to sunlight, silver, hell even garlic." You explained. Jack stilled in your arm a second but your mind was still spinning in the glare.

"Wait garlic?" Jack squawked. You hissed lightly at the sudden increase in volume. Jack cleared his throat. "Lo siento, but garlic? Your allergic to garlic?"

"Violently." You answered.

"I've been cooking for you for months y/n. What if I poisoned you!" Jack whispered angrily. In his mind he was cataloging every dish he'd ever given you, try desperately to remember if he'd almost killed you.

"Never ate things that smelled like it, plus it really has to be more concentrated to do any real damage." You explained squeezing his arm. "I like when you cook." You hummed slumping your head against his arm. The dizzying heat was starting to make your mind feel fuzzy. Jack settled, enjoying having your near again.

He'd been feeling uncomfortable with your old friend around and not just because it was straining his neck. Something about Blade had him sure he didn't mean well, maybe the lack of explanation regarding his plan. Or maybe just the way he stayed primed to attacked at all times.

"We're here." Blade announced.

Ahead the British museum stood, gleaming white stone causing you to groan and advert your eyes. You followed Jack and Blade through the crowds of tourists towards a quiet area. Indoors you fared a little better, more able to walk on your own. Still you kept close to Jack for now. After all he seemed pretty agitated by all this.

"Contact should be here shortly. You holding up?" Eric asked. You looked up at him through your sunglasses grimacing slightly. He chuckled at you a second as he leaned on the wall.

"Hey can't be worse than Moscow right?" Blade smirked at you, glancing briefly down to Jack. You laughed suddenly, arm unlinking from Jack's as you pointed an accusatory finger to Eric.

"Oh I think you know why that was worse." You giggled again. Jack frowned beside you. He couldn't help glaring at Blade while you laughed together. He didn't have much time to stew however when a man cleared his throat.

Jack looked up at the new comer, curly haired guy in a flat cap looking off to the side before meeting his gaze. He was stern looking, sporting a fading bruise over an eye and some stubble.

"Got your lead Blade." The man grunted in an out of place Brooklyn accent. He seemed to mainly scowl at you and Jack. "I've got permission to end you lot if this goes south." He sneered.

"Sure you do." Blade said. "Night's safer with us in it, sure the big guy knows that too."

The man grunted but stayed silent for the moment. He turned to watch as some visitors passed by your group. Between Eric's leather, the mans injured appearance and your giant sunglasses, you couldn't be surprised you garnered stares. You were a rather eclectic group. Jack was about the only one of you pulling off a somewhat normal appearance. Well a very handsome appearance but far less jarring to the public in his shirt and slacks.

"Well he seems delightful." Jack whispered into your ear. You smiled softly at him and he grinned back.

"Caught him with a bad attitude, he's nicer when he's English." Blade responded.

"Not telling while the suckheads' here." He jabbed, turning back to you. Jack squared himself but your hand touched his gently. You have a warning look, slowly shaking your head.

"We'll meet you back at the hotel." You explained to Blade before taking Jack's arm and walking off for the taxi rank.

It'd be hours before sunset and there'd likely be a fight by the end of the night, always was with Eric. You took the opportunity to lay on the king sized bed and rest for the moment. Jack sat on the edge taking his shoes off, face set in a frown.

"Not like you to be so grumpy." You joked. Jack didn't laugh, just turning to you with a serious expression.

"Can we trust Blade?" He said sternly. You sighed and sat up, shuffling over to sit by him, resting a shoulder to his. You missed the comfort of the cabin, Ted, sitting warmed by the fire with Jack.

"No." You admitted. "Blade's...Eric... he'll do whatever it takes to keep people safe from vampires. If he thinks I'm a threat to them I'm done for."

"So why come? It seems too much to risk?" Jack asked his hand coming to meet your own on the bed as he turned to face you. His forehead creased in worry and you wished you could reach out and soothe him. Ruffle the fluffy salt and pepper locks like you would through the bars of the cabin's cage.

"My sires bad news. As long as he's out there people are dying. I've been after him for years..." You explained as Jack rubbed a thumb across your knuckles. "But hey don't worry, Blade'll have him dusted before we know it and we'll be back home before the full moon."

Jack knew there was more to this for you but didn't pry. He gave your hand a quick squeeze before heading to the rooms bathroom. He chose to focus instead on how you'd called the cabin home. Letting his thoughts run wild and butterflies dance in his stomach. Soon you'd be back there together engulfed in the honeyed mix of your scents that felt right. Not catching the sharp hit of something bitter off Blade around you.

When Eric returned he told you the next steps. You blanched, you'd need to go to a vampire safe house. A building that'd be full of other less friendly vampires with your mouth watering warm blooded friend.

"Look this is a vampire club, I just think it'd be best if you watched our backs." You pleaded from the bathroom mirror. The very idea of Jack stepping foot in that place made your gut twist.

"Actually it'll just be you." Blade interjected. "Dracula won't turn up if I'm there."

"No! no no, we can't just leave them in there alone." Jack bit at him. Even amongst others of your kind he didn't like it. He wanted to be with you in this, not out on the step waiting.

"Wait Dracula?" He asked turning to Blade.

"Excuse me?" You said indignantly peaking round the door. "I'll have you know I'm more than capable of taking care of myself."

"That's not what I meant...." Jack swallowed meeting your eyes. Your expression was set though he could tell his comment stung. He sighed before turning back to Blade.

"So we just wait out on a building near by, like a pair of idiotas" He asked.

Which is exactly what they were doing. Blade set up at the edge with thermal googles watching into the building. Jack sulked on the roofing peaking down at the painted over windows.

You'd emerged from the bathroom dressed up for this club in the least amount of clothing he'd ever seen on you. Tight leather cut short that hugged you just right. It took all his self control not to drool as he followed along. The idea of everyone in that place doing the same made his blood boil.

"So how long you two been a thing?" Blade asked suddenly.

"What!" Jack squeaked. "no, no we're not dating..." He babbled. "They, we just ran into trouble together. We're friends!" Jack cursed inwardly, he didn't even believe himself. Still Blade just hummed, looking back to the other side of the building.

"Just never seen Y/n so...happy." Blade added.

"Qué?" Jack frowned.

"Just always been... angry." Blade shrugged. "Always just on the hunt."

Jack thought about you. You were rather skittish when he first met you but he'd never have described you as angry. Hell he was half surprised you were actually a vampire, he'd never have believed it if he couldn't smell it on you. Or if your beautiful smile didn't flash a hint of fang.

"That how you met then?" Jack asked bitterly. He knew hearing the details on you two would only make him upset but the curiosity got the better of him.

"Yeah, knew my mentor. Stopped by a few times over the years, helped with the training. I'm not much for working with others." He explained. Jack soured, so you did have a lot of history together and from the slight smile Blade wore now he was fonder than he'd let on to you.

"So you ever date?" Jack probed instantly regretting it. Blade didn't snap at him though just snorting at the thought. "What? Y/n's amazing it's not a stupid question." Jack huffed.

"I met them when I was 13." Blade explained turning to look at Jack at last. He flushed at the bemused expression Eric held as he stared down at him squirming. "They're basically family."

"Oh." Was all Jack could manage out before Eric clapped a hand against his head ruffling his hair and laughing at him.

"You really thought we'd...?" He snorted again. "Man you got it bad."

Jack grumbled avoiding meeting Blade's eyes as he stared down at the building bellow. Another vampire passed through the double doors into the neon glow inside but he wasn't their guy. Jack turned his attention to the passersby keeping his eyes pealed for groups.

"So Dracula?" He asked, hoping Eric wouldn't press him further on his feelings.

"Yup." Eric said not taking his eyes from his watch.

"Like, Dracula Dracula?" Jack pressed.

"One of them." Eric hummed.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A shiver ran down your spine. The club was hot, bodies pressed in tightly and writhing to the music. It set your hair on end to be surrounded by them. Not least because of what Eric told you once Jack was out of earshot.

Tonight you were bait.

The Count had been seen around London in the last week, often hitting up blood banks and local night life. Supposedly he was on his best behaviour since the city had it's own protection. Still Blade knew him as well as you did, no way he hadn't killed already. Still he'd risk coming out here for you even if it drew the communities attention. Jack would've opposed to this plan, you knew he would. So he was out there in the dark with half the plan on his mind.

You pressed through sweaty dancers clad in leather and lace to the bar and flagged for a drink. To your left a couple kissed, teeth nicking each others lips and blood being passed by their clashing tongues. At least there were no humans here, no harm done.

Blade was watching from the opposite building, ready to send you a message if he spotted anything. So you were just trying your best to stand out, dance and hope someone sent word of your arrival sooner rather than later. You didn't think you could stomach being in this outfit for more than an hour. Not with the way Jack had stared at you when he saw you in it, your sure he thought you looked terrible. You thought that much with your bites visible.

"Not your usual scene y/n." A man spoke softly to your left. You didn't turn taking your drink and downing the lot in one go.

"Could say the same Doctor." You hummed. The man chuckled lightly before flagging for a drink himself.

"Got word our mutual friend was in town, so I'm leaving. Just stopping by for a drink and to warn you." He hummed into his glass.

"That what we are? Last I saw you, you'd left me to our friend." You hissed.

"He's on his way, if this isn't your plan. Run." He said leaving his drink and walking away through the crowd. You lost his dark hair in the crowd quickly. You wished you could just message Jack, take your mind off things for a little bit but no. If this was going to work you needed to appear like you were here for fun.

With liquid encouragement you went under the flashing lights. The music was odd but not without a good rhythm, so you danced. After a few songs you'd found yourself amongst a group of excited women that managed to tease a smile from you.

The comfort didn't last as a cold hand snaked its way around your hips and drew you back sharply. The girls went to hiss at the interruption but froze looking behind you. All at once the place fell silent and still, save for the cruel chuckle in the shell of your ear. One of the girls gave an apologetic look before they scattered.

The room was suddenly far emptier, dancers running out when the fun stopped and the threat unveiled himself. Now Vlad held you flush against him. You were alone on the dance floor with him, his loyal guards covering all the entrances. Blade would have noticed them, seemed like you'd just need to bide your time for his arrival.

"To what do I owe the delight of seeing you here darling?" He purred against your skull. His nose rubbed against you hair before he huffed and shoved you forward. You stumbled over yourself on the blood slick floor.

"Surely you know better than to be picking up strays?" He sneered bloodied lips curling. You cursed, of course Jack's scent would be all over you after spending all day so close. You fought back your own glare as you righted yourself.

"Well no one ever did teach me my manners." You quipped. Your phone was pressed close to your skin but you felt no buzz. Where were they? Fear shivered through your bones, a light tremble reaching your fingers.

"A mistake I've tried to righten time and time again." He said rolling his pale blue eyes. He stalked forward and circled around you, appraising you. You'd forgotten just how tall he was, practically stooping to not hit the disco ball. "Tonight I intend to do so, one way or another."

His large slender hand suddenly flung up to your cheeks. Vlad's bruising icy grip wrapping round your skull making it harder to stand your ground. You kept your eyes locked on his, some prey instinct kicking in to keep a predator in sight. He turned your face to the side leaning in to your neck.

Your skin itched with adrenaline the burn to lash out, to fight him. It was so unlike the last time someone was this close. When Jack had fallen asleep watching VHS's in the cabin and slumped onto your shoulder. His hot breath fanning out against your throat as he slept peacefully.

It was not too dissimilar to the first time Vlad went for your throat. You'd fought him then, fragile human hands clawing at his eyes and legs kicking. It didn't save you from the bite then, 10s of scars littered you from him and his brides to prove that.

Before lip or tongue met your skin you were being launched across the room. Warm firm arms clasped you close to a heaving chest as a roar sounded out above you. Jack landed on his heals keeping you pressed to him.

The count laughed across the room, clasping his hands in a loud clap. His guards had weapons drawn and a ways into the building you could hear gun fire.

"Oh delightful you brought your pet." He sang. "Be a good dog and put what's mine down won't you?" He mocked.

"Nothing yours here, gilipollas!" Jack snarled over growing fangs. He placed you to your feet by him as the guards approached.

"Pity, guess I'll have to put this dog down y/n." He tutted. Jack lunged at his claws swiping but he shifted. Undeterred Jack dove low and swung his foot out but Dracula was quicker backing up out of his strike.

The first of the guards reached for you. The small silver stake you'd hidden was in your hand and embedded in their chest in a moment. Behind you a gun cocked but you leapt before the first shot, the volley of bullets hitting other guards instead. You flipped over the gunman and got him in the back. Heart pierced he burned to ash in seconds.

You heard Jack cry out, a pained yelp as he went flying. He crashed hard against the bar, struggling to get up. You moved to help but another guard shifted into your path. You cursed swinging at him but he caught your hand and slammed a fist into your nose. Pain blinded for a second you leapt back. You vision blurred as tears rushed to your eyes over your broken nose. You saw him rushing you regardless and rolled out of his path. The abandoned gun suddenly within reach you grabbed it and fired.

It wasn't silver but he was downed for the moment, crying and writhing on the dance floor. Jack slammed into the ground by you and you rushed to him. Crouched over his prone and groaning form you shot at your sire. He was quick, far quicker than you or the gun and blurred between poses until the clip was empty. His face was a mask of rage, twisted far beyond recognition.

"You'd have this foul creature over me?" He hissed. Vibrant blue veins popped against chalk white skin as he slicked back waist length hair.

Silver stake in hand you kept your protective position over Jack. His groaning had ceased but he didn't move. You listened intently to his steady breath and his pattering heart. Alive.

"In every life and in every death!" You screamed back to Vlad. He snarled but it was from behind you felt a sting of pain. Confused you reached to its sourced at your neck, needle falling and clattering to the ground. Your hand gripped the surrounding skin as it burned then numbed. A heavy feeling pushed down on you and you found yourself crumpling down over Jack.

"No..." You breathed out as a black haired figure entered view. "Michael?"

"Sorry y/n..." He said softly as the shadows over took your vision.

#jack russell x reader #werewolf by night #my fics #blade #teeth for hire

[nightglider124]

Just finished new episode of Titans…

Oooooo things be getting interesting 👀

This episode seemed to pick things up a little bit more than last week. Last week defo felt very filler-ish.

Some points:

Omg the whole zombie bit was fucking hilarious 😂 Jinx’s commentary about it was funny and then Gar and Tim being all like yay when Connor decapitated Deathstroke and then being like naaaay when he got back up?? 😂😂 that whole scene was funny af.

I do not enjoy the foreshadowing of Kory having a role in all this. Like im bypassing the fact its central to Rachel and Sebastian too cos like Kory is my girl. The fairytale book and the fact her powers were not working in the zombie bit. Also, the fact MM or Gina was like ‘I don’t think the tamaranean will like her part’ like excuse the fuck me pls do not touch her thanks. I know they said like Kory gets hurt but like i am v much not looking forward to that at all. Like, how hurt we talking? Coma? I also really don’t wanna be Kory-less for half an episode of smth when she gets hurt unless the whole time Dick is gonna be foaming at the mouth in rage, ya feel me?

I do not understand Jinx’s powers at all like since when can she morph into other people?? I genuinely don’t know her abilities- i only ever knew of her character from the 2003 cartoon which was purely ‘bad luck’. But in Titans, I am assuming she’s just witch all round…

Interesting that they did flashbacks, showing us the story of Sebastian and MM and how she became the villain like she was clearly cracked anyway since she was straight into that cult w/o a second thought. It was a good choice, I think. She was a character who I didn’t mind finding out the backstory unlike the needless eps in previous seasons where we really didn’t need them.

Connor, whatcha doin there buddy?? You good?! I think i’d be a bit freaked if i puked up blood and a snake but something tells me he be getting controlled. Again interesting since in the comics, Dick is the one who ends up getting brainwashed by CoB so I am curious if they are swapping Dick for Connor in the show or if Dick will be brainwashed at some later stage or something.

Again, y’all I am v scared for Kory… like I know she doesn’t die but I also do not want her hurt like I will feel as feral as the team.

I know they gave Jinx the past romance etc but she really does scream snarky annoying lil sister vibes? 😂

I like that they’ve come full circle from s1 or at least I like the fact they have made them link. It feels less like they were making it up as they went along, even if they were.

I am extremely rolling my eyes at Dick for brushing off Kory’s visions like bitch your misses defo has a point here?? I get Dick doesn’t believe in visions and destinies etc whereas Kory wholeheartedly does but that makes it worse for when Kory gets hurt and we BEST get a scene of Dick being like fuck i shoulda listened to her about that.

I am greedy I know but I really want more romance realisation for Dick and Kory like the waiting is putting me on edge. I have a feeling Kory will get hurt in the latter part of the season. I was on insta looking back at when they were filming and when they were filming the vision of Mar’i, there was word of it being the second to last episode and we are all assuming she has the vision of them when she is hurt? I’m like I swear to God, we best not be getting dickkory in literally the last two eps (i am aware of the date scene so yay) cos at this rate, they won’t actually have any romance til s5 which is looking unlikely to be renewed for…

However, I did like the fact that Dick still spent majority of the time with Kory. She is literally always beside him as well as whenever they split or team up, Dick seems to always have Kory with him. Tis cute. I also liked when they were barricading themselves, Dick was like yeah me and kory will take the doors and its like bro was that just cos she is sick in hand to hand combat cos like you saw her powers doing fuck all so whats the thought process behind that??

I think that’s all my thoughts on the episode this week. It was good; better story wise than last week, imo. I’m excited/scared for next weeks ep since they were like yeah dickkory fans are gonna be screaming… good screaming like they get it on at a motel since we defo saw bts of a motel? Or bad screaming like Kory is gonna get messed up by CoB? WHICH IS IT??

I defo don’t think its next weeks ep that we will be seeing Kory’s vision of Mar’i and Dick tho 🤔

#titans s4 spoilers #titans spoilers #dc titans #dickkory #night notions

[therandomavenger]

What Pride Means to Me

Step into the wayback machine with me for a moment.

The year is 1995. It’s the middle of summer. I am sitting in a movie theater with my best friend, Jennie, and we are watching one of the most popular films of that year, Mel Gibson’s Braveheart. <I thought you were going to write about Pride, you say? Give me a moment.>

Now, this is an entertaining film, made with obvious passion. It has a moving story and great performances. Its main villain is the English King, Edward I, played by Patrick McGoohan. Amidst all the major and minor characters is the character of Edward’s son, Prince Edward. As a prince, he’s not living up to his father’s expectations. And, though it’s ever really stated on screen, one of the reasons for this is he’s always in the company of his best friend, who is obviously also his gay lover.

The prince and his lover are mewling and foppish, presented without any redeeming qualities. The lover encourages the prince to stick up for himself against his father, and this all comes to a head in one scene in the middle of the film, where Edward is commanding the prince to do something, the prince protests, the lover says something cutting to the king, and the King grabs the lover and throws him out of the nearest window, to his death.

In the film, this moment is played entirely for laughs. And it got a big laugh from the audience I was sitting in. And in all the commentary this film has garnered over the years, I’ve not seen one other person mention this scene, let alone how problematic it is.

Now, clearly Edward II is the villain in this movie. It’s not like the main hero did this. But still, it doesn’t even seem to be added by the narrative to the list of Edward’s crimes. Indeed, the audience sympathizes with his frustration, and supports this casual murder. The prince is given very little further space in the story, merely doing what his father wants the rest of the film, his trauma unremarked upon.

I think I even laughed at this scene the first time that I saw it, because it’s presented as a moment of physical comedy. But I’ve thought about this scene a lot over the years, obviously, since it’s coming up in a blog post 28 years later.

This kind of thing was common in the 90’s. If gay people existed in media at all, we were disposable. The first victims of a murderer. Films that explored our lives focused mainly on the traumatic parts, and usually had one or more characters dying of AIDS (Philadelphia, I’m looking at you).

Now, I am including myself in that group now, but back then I would not have. While I was aware that I was attracted to guys, I kind of buried that deep within myself, sealing it up in a box that I did not dare open. It was my most shameful secret, one that I’d die to keep. And is it any wonder I didn’t want any part of it, given the examples I was seeing? I had no vision of happy gay people, living their truth. Now, I am aware that they existed. There have been gay writers and filmmakers putting out work for a long time. I’m not saying they didn’t exist. But they did not have a large audience or any kind of promotional budget and I, living in a small town in Indiana, was not aware of them.  

I think the first example of a non-traumatized gay character I came across was Matt in Melrose Place. And while Matt was canonically gay, and allowed to have a romantic life on screen, he was forced by the network sensors to say goodnight to every one of his dates with a firm handshake. So, it was technically representation, but was it really …?

I had never heard of Pride month back then, and I wouldn’t have done anything about it if I had. I didn’t say the words, “I am gay” to myself until I was 32. And it would take another 14 years for me to say it to another person.

So, Pride … I think I became aware of Pride around the time the gay marriage supreme court case went through. Now, I was out to myself at the time, but so deep in the closet that I could see Narnia. I was married to a woman and raising my children, and I thought ‘I might be gay, but it doesn’t mean anything because this is the life I chose for myself, and it would hurt too many people to disrupt.’ But when that decision came down, I felt so much joy. I knew why but didn’t say this to anyone. Because I knew it meant that someday, if circumstances changed, I would be able to live as my true self. I would not have to hide forever. And maybe that planted the seed that I wasn’t as trapped as I thought I was.

That year was the first time I noticed Pride going on. And I wanted to be part of it but couldn’t let myself. I wasn’t ready to blow apart my life yet. I wouldn’t be for another four years. So, Pride to me means standing up and being counted. If Braveheart were made today, I don’t think they would casually murder the prince’s lover and play it for laughs. There are popular network shows where gay people get to kiss their boyfriends and girlfriends on screen.  This even happens on so-called ‘family shows,’ (case in point my late, beloved Willow).  Queer people are allowed to live their lives in the open, and in most places in the west, are given equivalent rights to straight people.

Now, in recent years we have been reminded that there are still many people who would gladly throw us out the nearest window. But those people are a minority. A sizable, vocal minority, yes, but a minority. Most people have a ‘live and let live’ attitude toward queer people now. People I once thought would never accept me if I came out of the closet and started living an authentic life have embraced me and welcomed my boyfriend into the family. Being gay has gone from being my most shameful secret to being one of the things I like most about myself. I’ve gone from praying to be straight to realizing that if I had the chance to be straight, I wouldn’t take it. It may not be a choice for me, but if it were, I’d choose to be queer. There’s nothing wrong with me (at least if there is, it’s not this).

So, that’s what Pride means to me. We can be proud of who we are. We can be the people we were created to be, and love the people we were created to love, no matter what gender that person is. It’s a giant middle figure to the people who want to push us back into the closet. We’re Here! We’re Queer! Go Fuck yourself!

I wish I could go back in time and tell my younger self that he would one day be able to accept every part of himself, and that it would be okay to be that person. He lived in pain for so many years, hating himself, afraid to even let himself be aware of what he really wanted. But those days are over, and we will stand together as a community and refuse to be forced back into those dark days. That’s what Pride is, a signal that we exist and are valid.

originally published on chadgrayson.com

#gay stuff #blog posts #pride #braveheart

[ofpineapplesanddawns]

Hahaha, you’re good! 

So this is for the urban explorer au, right?

On with the fic!

--

Peter fiddled with the camera in his hands, maybe it might be better to use his phone for this, but then again, phones broke easier and they often didn’t have night vision. Plus, old school shit like this was so much more fun, gave his videos a whole Blair Witch or REC feel to ‘em.

He sighed as he got himself ready to go explore an old roadside hotel, one that clearly had been left to rot or blow away with the Mojave sand about fifty years ago. The old neon sign right off the road had a very dated look, and not in a retro way people were obsessed with nowadays. 

“Fuck, I hope this place doesn’t have vampires.” He muttered to himself as he patted at his belt, a few stakes were tucked into it, just in case.

Ever since he ran into that Lucian guy at the old office building, where the vampire had been camping out, Peter had been much more careful about the places he explored. Yes, he still filmed these places, still pretended he was hunting vampires or ghosts or whatever the fuck he said at the beginning of a video, but there was a real threat now, lurking behind corners in the shadows.

And he wasn’t sure if he’d get lucky with Lucian showing up again.

Though he really, really hoped.

He couldn’t stop thinking about that super hot, super mysterious man in the leather jacket. He was very pretty too and had an accent that almost seemed to mask a different accent, the more Peter listened to the recording from the office.

He still hadn’t posted that video, he wasn’t sure if it would be right to do so. Plus, the building caught on fire later that night, apparently he heard something about it happening from a lightning strike, but he wondered if Lucian had a hand in it. After all, it was the sight of a vampire nest, and it might be wise to destroy a nest so others wouldn’t take it and make a new one. 

Still, Peter was gonna keep doing what he was doing and hope that there wasn’t a nest waiting for him inside this place. 

But maybe a Lucian might be inside? Yes? 

Probably not, that’s wishful thinking.

Peter turned on his camera and started an intro on the fly, explaining the hotel’s history a little, because lots of these sorta videos did that, before he made his way inside. 

It smelled horrible here, like rotting wood and fabric, along with stale weed, probably teenagers hanging out here. Unless if vampires liked to partake. Peter spoke as he walked around, pointing out the things he saw, nearly screaming when he stepped on something crunchy, only to see it was a mummified bird. 

He walked around the hotel, chatting about this and that, even promoting his show, as he always did, before he actually did scream when something grabbed his shoulder. He turned around, free hand on a stake, only for his clip-on torch to shine on the face of-

“Lucian!?” He gasped, both from surprise and the terrible amount of dust and stale air in the building.

“I’m surprised you remember my name.” Lucian replied, looking bemused. “Looking for trouble again, Mr. Vincent.”

“Nnn- no, just, uh... just doin’ some... huntin’! Vampire huntin’!”

“With a camera.”

“And a little urban exploring.” Peter mumbled and shut off the camera, He looked at Lucian’s face and glared. “Shut up.”

“I didn’t say anything.” The shorter man said, though he was smiling anyway. “You do know it isn’t exactly wise to make commentary when vampire hunting, yes? It will draw attention right to you.”

Peter made a series of noises before pouting. “The viewers like me talkin’ about the shit I’m filming. But I guess that’s how you heard me?”

“I heard you long before you entered the building. Pulling into the parking lot? Not a smart idea if there are vampires here, they’ll be very aware of you long before you’re aware of them.”

“Oh.”

Peter hadn’t even thought of that, shit, that... yeah, that was just asking for trouble. “Then how’d you get out here, it’s a bit of a distance from the city.”

“I drove, but parked a bit down the road.”

“Oh.” Peter repeated, remembering passing a truck that was parked off the side of the road while on his way here. “Fuck, you’re a professional, aren’t you?”

“In a way, I suppose you could say that. If you are looking for vampires, there are none here, I’ve already checked. It’s not really a safe place for them, not a lot of dark places that would do them well. There is a nest of very angry coyotes upstairs though.”

“Fuck.” Peter frowned. “I wasted a trip out here then.”

“Well, I’m sure your... viewers would still appreciate whatever video footage you’ve taken anyway.”

“I guess, could do a bit more explorin’ before I head out. Wanna explore with me?”

Lucian frowned. “Might not be wise, I should get going.”

“Come on! It’s fun! I’ll even keep you off-camera if you don’t want that!”

“I... guess.”

“Cool, let’s get back to work.” The actor started up his camera again. “Got a torch?”

“Ah.” Lucian blinked. “Oh, yes, uh, but the batteries died before I came to see what you were doing.”

“How’d you find me then?”

“You have your own, and you’re very loud.”

“Rude.” Peter smirked, then lifted the camera up to face him. “Sorry about that, just had a conversation with a guy who saved my ass a few weeks back. And no, I’m not postin’ that video, you don’t need to see me gettin’ knocked around by some... weird guy who wanted to bite me. Wasn’t a vampire!” He added on when he saw a look cross Lucian’s face.

“Anyway, back to business!”

--

Peter thinks that if he can run into Lucian again, maybe he might get him into his bed.

Not happening, Peter. At least not right now. Lucian is a classy man, he likes romance. 

#lucian x peter vincent #john's drabbles #good omens extended universe

[favoniuscodex]

embrace. [zhongli x reader]

prompt: lifting someone up out of excitement + zhongli // in which you take a commission and disappear for a few months. all zhongli wants is to be able to hold you in his arms again -- is that too much to ask? pairing: zhongli x gn!reader warnings: disappearance, description of injuries. it’s angst to fluff, okay? word count: ~1.6k words a/n: the spirit of sad zhongli consumed me and i really wanted to write this angst piece i guess. happy ending tho, dw. this is the power of the forehead zhongli pics.

Despite the countless years Zhongli had lived, it felt as if it had been eons since he last saw you. Each morning, he would awake to the other side of the bed being empty, your side of the still neatly made while the former archon’s half of the sheets had been jostled to the high heavens from his restlessness due to your absence. He had become accustomed to your brief absences as you were an adventurer. Your commissions often forced you away from his side for days at a time.

However, there had never been an absence as worrisome as your current one. For the last month, you had gone completely off the grid. Nobody had heard from you, nobody even knew if you were alive. What should have been a simple mission led to your complete disappearance. Zhongli had even gone as far to recruit Childe in the search for you, but even his Fatui connections had turned up nothing.

All Zhongli had left was continuous use of his resources to seek out any lead that might bring you home, but in the cold nights spent alone, Zhongli couldn’t help but bitterly weep over the fact that if he was still an archon, he would have found you by now. Stuck in this mortal form with limited powers, Zhongli feels the sheer vulnerability that ingrains itself within human DNA as he dresses up for work every day. He feels the hollow fear that paints his insides and dries quickly whenever he looks in the mirror. It leaves a film that feels as if it will never go away.

For once in his life, the almighty Morax feels useless. He detests experiencing such mortal woes, but he can almost hear Guizhong’s amused laughter in his ear about how Rex Lapis had fallen so hard and felt so desperate over the company of a mere mortal human.

She would have loved you, he realizes one day as he eats his breakfast alone. Before Zhongli can stop himself, tears are falling onto his plate as unfamiliar emotions consume him once more.

One month turns into two. Two turn into four. Four turn into six and Zhongli only grows more bitter. Even with the limitations of this weakened form he took on when he gave up his archonhood, his memory is still as strong as ever. Zhongli cherishes the way he can tell others stories about you, but despises the way your smile shines in his mind every time he closes his eyes. He detests the way his hand feels bare without yours in it. Most of all, Zhongli hates the way he can’t hear the three little words he had come to adore fall from your lips once more, even if their memory echoes around in his head.

In the mortal-centric world that Zhongli now traverses, there is little time for grief. Life moves on and unfortunately, Zhongli realizes, everyone expects him to as well. Work continues on as usual at Wangsheng Funeral Parlor, but Hu Tao’s pranks are softer and his colleagues are kinder in their words. Eventually, people stop asking about you. No news means nothing has changed and Zhongli can see in their eyes that they have no hope of your return.

He wonders if the mortals pity him for his loss.

Zhongli wonders if they would still feel differently if they knew he was Rex Lapis.

Rather than letting empty nights consume him as he sits in your shared home alone, Zhongli takes on more work. Hu Tao initially voices her concerns, but a sharp, yet desperate glance from Zhongli has her holding back her words and instead has her placing more paperwork upon Zhongli’s desk. If Zhongli can’t be efficient in searching for you, he might as well busy himself until you return. 

You will return, he reassures himself. You have to.

Zhongli lies in bed with a new lover: Grief. It wraps her seductive arms around him, pulling him into her misery, entrenching him in the bitter aftertaste of love that has long since reached its expiry date. He hates her, yet she refuses to leave the bed, resting on your side and holding him close. If he squints, the hollow void of Grief materializes itself in the shape of you.

Zhongli requests more paperwork to avoid her company.

However, eight months after your disappearance, Zhongli’s outlook on the world flips on its head once more. The desolation that rages inside him is briefly distracted as commotion occurs outside of Zhongli’s office. The funeral consultant’s door is closed, yet the sheer noise of shuffling and yelling that appears to be coming from the desk of the receptionist causes him to poke his head out the doorframe.

Down the hall, he sees a frantic head of ginger hair, which quickly matches Zhongli’s eyes with its own cerulean ones. Childe, Zhongli notes with confusion. The two of them were friends, certainly, but not close enough to make impromptu visits to the other’s place of work.

“Zhongli!” Childe bellows down the hall and Zhongli wonders what situation could possibly result in Childe feeling the need to disrupt the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor in such an uncouth manner. Zhongli’s bewilderment grinds to an abrupt halt as Childe utters his next three words.

“We found them.”

The next moments are agonizingly slow, despite the immediate rush Zhongli throws himself into, hastily getting his things together and heading out the door. A simple nod from Hu Tao gives him the permission he needs to leave, but Zhongli would have fought Celestia if it meant he could see you again. The paperwork that rests on his desk is long since forgotten as he follows Childe’s hurried pace, the two of them nearly breaking out into a sprint as Childe guides Zhongli to your location.

When Zhongli sets eyes on you, you’re resting in an infirmary bed in the back of Northland Bank, one typically used for fallen Fatui agents. Amidst the Tsaritsa’s décor, your innocence looks out of place, but Zhongli’s heart swells nonetheless. Your figure is exhausted as your chest softly moves up and down, eyes shut in an uncomfortable rest. Bruises and scars mottle your skin, along with bandages that encase your arms and legs. Even with all of your injuries and your battered state, Zhongli swears he’s never seen a more relieving, beautiful sight.

You’re alive. Quietly, Zhongli moves to sit next to you and reaches out for your hand, but hesitates before he can take it in yours. The two of you had been apart for so long. You were in front of him now, yet your sleeping status still left a divide between the two of you. It was clear to Zhongli that you had been through hell and back, so he withdraws his hand, not wanting to bother your rest, and instead elects to sit on a chair near your bed.

Childe wordlessly excuses himself before Zhongli can issue his thanks, but the archon knows that Childe is more than aware of how much Zhongli appreciates the gesture of the Fatui both rescuing you and allowing you to recuperate on their premises. No debt goes unpaid, but Zhongli would have paid any amount of Mora just to see you safe again.

As Zhongli shifts his weight, the wooden chair lets out a noisy creak and, much to Zhongli’s horror, your eyes flutter open groggily at the noise.

“Zhongli,” You croon, moving to step out of the bed. At that moment, Zhongli realizes you’re farther in the healing process than expected, likely due to the work of one of the Fatui’s Vision-wielding healers. You stumble over to him and Zhongli immediately stands, capturing you in his firm arms before you can fall.

“Darling, you should rest,” Zhongli chides, but the look of love in your eyes as you glance at him silences his complaints. Warmth floods through his chest as your body heat merges with his. You are here. You have returned.

Before he can stop himself, Zhongli lets out a relieved laugh before lifting you up and twirling you around in a hug. You let out a noise of surprise before giggling along with him. As he sets you down, you use the opportunity to plant a kiss on Zhongli’s cheek before wrapping your arms around his torso, hugging him tightly. Your firm yet gentle touch reminds him of his godhood. With you, Zhongli feels unstoppable.

“I missed you,” You murmured, leaning in to listen to his heartbeat. “I thought of you every day.”

Once again overwhelmed by the utterly unfamiliar, utterly human emotions, Zhongli’s eyes well up with tears as you begin to hum a soft Liyuean melody as you hold him close, his hands rubbing small circles on your back as he returns your gesture. For all the times he had wished to hear those three little words from you again, Zhongli realizes what he desired most of all those months you had been missing: the ability to say the words to you himself.

Rather than be his typical longwinded self, Zhongli realizes that for all of the complexities that entrench the current situation, only simple words are needed to convey all that he feels in this moment. Therefore, rather than reciting affirmations that would rival that of the most glorious of weddings, Zhongli smiles softly and presses a kiss to your hair as you continue to listen to his heartbeat.

“I love you,” He murmurs and, as you bury your face in his chest, he feels you smile in return as you trace a heart with one of your fingers onto his back.

For all the months you had been gone, he now has a plethora more to make memories with you and Zhongli is determined to keep you safe throughout all of them.

#writing endings is hard lol #might remove the primogem banner if this doesnt show up in tags eventually #zhongli #genshin impact #zhongli x reader #genshin impact x reader #//zhongli

[mypoisonedvine]

Seeing Red | bodyguard!Bucky Barnes x actress!reader (part 6)

(part 1) (part 2) (part 3) (part 4) (part 5)

series summary:  bucky used to brag that he didn’t have a celebrity crush, or really care about famous people at all, which is what made him the perfect person to start working for a celebrity like yourself.  except, of course, it’s just his luck that he’d fall for you.  

word count: 5.1k

warnings: smut (in the form of road head lmao) plus some more implied smut and teasing and stuff, use of 'y/n' which is perfectly fine but it still makes me anxious cause I've never done it before, other than that just fluff and celebrity/PR stuff

You tilted your head slightly as you watched Bucky emerge from the pool, slicking his wet hair back out of his face, body dripping with cool droplets that sparkled in the afternoon sunlight.

Yeah, you were never going to get tired of this view.

“See somethin’ you like?” he grinned as he grabbed a towel and rubbed it over his hair before lowering it to dab off his shoulders and torso, his dog tags jingling lightly when he bumped against them.

“Yeah, why don’t you come over here and put that body on me?” you purred. He chuckled and stepped closer, tossing the damp towel aside before leaning down to climb onto your pool chair and hover above you; the dog tags hung low and tickled your stomach, making you giggle a little.

“I don’t know that I should, I actually have a girlfriend…” he explained, feigning hesitance as you sat up slightly to nibble at his jaw.

“You know, a lot of couples have a ‘celebrity pass,’ and I just so happen to be a celebrity… do you two have one of those?”

“Maybe we do,” he replied nonchalantly, raising an eyebrow.

“Who’s yours?”

“This really hot girl I saw once, in this really crappy movie,” he winked.

“Hey!” you laughed, shoving him back. “Which one of my movies is crappy?”

“What makes you think you’re the hot girl I’m talking about?” he countered.

“Oh, you’re really trying to get yourself in trouble.”

“Just to be clear— we’re not going to have any celebrity passes, right?" he frowned. "Because you know a lot of famous people and I don’t like those odds.”

You scoffed. “Definitely not.”

“Good. I can only handle one famous woman at a time anyways,” he chuckled.

//

He, meanwhile, would never get tired of waking up beside you, holding you before you were even really aware of anything yet, feeling you stir in his arms and snuggle up close to his chest.

“Bucky…” you mumbled sleepily into his shoulder.

“Yeah?” he whispered, smiling a little as your eyes fluttered but didn’t really open.

You just hummed and shifted again, looking so peaceful that he couldn’t help but kiss your forehead. “Mornin’, beautiful,” he purred.

And there was the best part of every morning: when you opened your eyes and looked up at him for the first time, and you smiled— actually smiled at the sight of him. He couldn’t remember the last time somebody was this happy to see him. He couldn’t imagine what he’d ever done to deserve it.

“Hi,” you greeted coyly.

“Hey there,” he grinned back. His eyebrow raised when he felt your foot delicately trail up the back of his leg, your hips beginning to straddle his. “Got somethin’ on your mind, pretty girl?”

“Maaaaybe…”

He chuckled, always impressed (in the best possible way) by your insatiability. “Already?”

“Yeah,” you nodded, “had a dream about you.”

“Care to enlighten me?” he prodded, rubbing your back with his metal hand.

“You had me bent over the bed…” you began, voice a bit lower than normal.

“Good start.”

“In my trailer," you finished.

“Oh, you’re filming in this dream?”

“Well, we weren’t filming right then," you grinned, and Bucky clenched his jaw just imagining the idea of filming you while he fucked you. Much too risky when celebrity sex tapes always seem to end up leaking, but a fun thought nonetheless. "But you made me promise to keep quiet in case somebody heard us. Said you didn’t want anybody else to know how I sound when I come.”

He smirked. “Seems like something I would say.”

“But really I liked the idea of everybody overhearing and knowing how good you make me feel… I want them all to know I’m yours.”

“Sounds like a nice dream,” he smirked, shivering slightly when you leaned in to start kissing his neck and jaw.

“Feel like making my dreams come true, stud?” you purred.

“Yes,” he admitted tensely, “but we don’t have time. You have a meeting at 9, remember?”

“No no no, we have time,” you assured. “We both know how fast you can make me come.”

“No point in doing something if you’re not gonna do it right,” he frowned, “and I don’t have time to do it right.”

“You really are just completely against quickies, aren’t you?”

“Morally and religiously, yes," he announced firmly as he puffed up his chest.

“Religiously?” you repeated with an eyeroll.

“Making you come at least three times is sacred,” he explained. “I worship your body. The shapes I make with my tongue on your clit? I’m spelling out my prayers.”

“You do spend a lot of time on your knees,” you remembered.

“Yeah, well, so do you,” he winked. “But you really do need to get up. And I need to shower before I go warm the car up.”

“Fine," you groaned, wrenching yourself out of his grasp and hopping out of bed.

"That's the spirit," he laughed, getting up with you and starting his own morning routine.

He had to keep you in check to make sure you were ready on time, but with a little encouragement he was able to get you in the car with even some time to spare. And since it was just the two of you and you weren't going to be seen getting out of the car, you could ride passenger and be closer to him.

"What's this meeting about again?" he asked as he took the car around the driveway and out of the front gate, starting the commute to the address you'd given him.

"Director wants me for a project, we're gonna talk about her vision and see if it's a good fit."

"Have you seen a script yet?" he asked, hoping that you'd let him take a look at it if you had.

"No, it's still being written, but the concept sounds amazing. I'll tell you all about it after the meeting," you promised.

He checked the estimated arrival time on the GPS screen and noticed it was even faster than he anticipated.

"Hey, we've got some room for error— do you wanna stop for breakfast?" he offered.

"I want breakfast, but I don't wanna stop," you decided.

"What, like drive-through?" he asked, but then you suddenly reached across the console and slid your hand over his thigh and right over his groin. "Oh, fuck."

You smirked as you leaned in a little bit, resting your head on his shoulder as he started to grow hard in your palm. "Keep your eyes on the road, okay?"

"O-okay," he nodded a little, shifting in his seat to make it easier for you to undo his belt and fly.

You reached into his boxers and wrapped your fingers around his shaft— even just that made him shiver and blink a few times to try to focus on driving. Your fingers were a little cold but it was welcome relief considering he was suddenly burning up.

A few strokes were enough to get him fully hard, and it took a deep breath to keep him together as you leaned your head down into his lap, giving a slow lick right over his tip. "Fuck," he whispered under his breath, but you definitely heard it because he could feel your smirk as you kissed up and down his length.

Just when he was about to beg for it, you wrapped your lips around him and sucked, gentle at first but slowly getting more aggressive as he fought the urge to buck up into your mouth.

"Oh god," he sighed, head falling back onto the headrest. Your tongue swiped over his slit where precum had gathered already, and it was just another reminder that you'd already found all his most sensitive places and planned to use them against him whenever you could.

A little hum echoing in your throat vibrated through his cock, making him hiss a little as you started to set your pace of bobbing up and down and stroking what you couldn't fit in your mouth. Little drops of your spit rolled down the shaft to his balls and if he wasn't trying to hard to look at the other cars on the road he would've let his eyes roll back in his head.

Finally, a red light gave him a chance to take his hands off the wheel and grab your hair, stroke your back, hold your face— he didn't really care what, he just needed to touch you.

"Baby," he groaned, "fuck, you're so good… keep sucking my cock, just like that, oh my god—"

A car horn tore him from the moment and made him realize the light had turned green. One hand quickly shot up to steer as he let his foot up off the brake, breathing through his teeth as you sucked him harder and deeper.

Just as he put his foot on the gas, you took him down your throat until your lips met with the very base of him, and the shock made his leg jerk and sent the car lurching forward.

You were laughing a little as you pulled off of him, still stroking his soaking wet length as you popped up to glance out the windshield and then up at him. "Drive much?"

"All the time," he defended breathlessly, "but, uh, not usually like this."

"You can handle it," you scoffed. "All you need to do is not hit any cars or poles or pedestrians. Just relax and let me get my breakfast…"

You went back down with a smirk as he exhaled sharply, silently promising himself that he was going to keep his cool and drive safely.

Instantly, the tip of your tongue just barely pushing into his slit sent that plan out the window, a loud moan echoing through the car and his eyes falling shut for only a moment.

"Jesus fucking Christ," he groaned.

You let out a coy little giggle before getting back into it, returning to your reliable pattern of stroking and sucking with the occasional venture into the back of your throat— but this time gaining speed steadily, making his toes curl inside his boots and the hairs on the back of his neck stand up.

His metal hand had a death grip on the steering wheel while his other stroked your hair and held you down just a moment longer each time your throat wrapped around his head.

"Fuck, baby, I'm gonna— oh god—" he tried to warn you.

You moaned approvingly, stroking your hand and bobbing your head faster.

His turn was coming up and he needed to get two lanes over, but at this point he accepted that he was going to miss the turn because he just needed to come down your throat right fucking now; he didn't even hear the GPS announcing that it was recalculating the route, he didn't even care that he was driving way too slow, all he could perceive was the feeling of your lips around him as he throbbed with each pump of his load onto your tongue.

"Fuuuuckkkk," he gasped as he held you down at your neck, making sure you got every drop. But that backfired pretty quickly when he let go and you still didn't come back up, sucking as if he hadn't come at all. "Oh— oh fuck!" he yelped, and his fears that his eyes would fall shut were gone because they were wide fucking open now, his breathing coming fast and hot through his teeth as your tongue refused to let up.

Your little moans made it clear this was not an accident, but a deliberate attack on his senses that made his entire body jolt.

He tried to pull you off of him, and you resisted for just a moment before finally giving him a break, popping up from his lap to swallow what was in your mouth and lick your lips with a prideful smirk. He allowed himself a quick glance at your satisfied expression as he laughed exhaustedly, still trying to catch his breath as you leaned back in your seat.

"You are…" he began, but he didn't even know where to start. "That was dangerous," he decided to inform you instead.

"But it was fun," you grinned.

Another red light gave him a chance to tuck his softened cock back into his jeans. "We're just a few minutes away, so I don't have time to return the favor," he realized with a frown.

"Don't sweat it, I get the feeling you're gonna more than make it up to me tonight."

"What makes you so sure?" he smirked, even though you were completely right.

"Because I'm gonna take you out somewhere fancy, and you always put out after I buy you dinner," you explained with a chuckle.

"It's cause every time we go out, I have to act all professional and stuff, so when we get home I just can't wait to get my hands on you again."

He pulled in to the parking garage of the studio, finding a spot before turning off the car. You were about to grab your bag but he pulled you into a kiss; not so desperate since he'd just come two minutes ago, but still plenty passionate as his tongue slid over yours in search of the taste of himself to remember what you'd done even clearer.

Your lips moved against his with a quiet little moan, so precious that he couldn't stop himself from gripping your waist tightly.

"You're sure you can't be a few minutes late?" he mumbled, barely pulling back as he reached up and held your face in his hands. "We could get in the back and you could ride me real quick."

"Ah ah ah, we know there's no 'real quick' with you, you said it yourself," you reminded him. "You'll say it's just to take the edge off and then I'll end up folded like a pretzel while you rail me for an hour."

He laughed; he couldn't deny that. "Fair enough. Go to your stupid meeting."

"It won't even take that long," you promised. "And I'll be thinking of you the whole time… hard not to when sucking you off got me so wet."

"Fuck," he growled, "you'd better leave now before I change my mind and make you stay."

You smiled and gave him a peck on the nose before opening the door and getting out of the car. He took a moment to watch you walk away before grabbing his newest borrowed book from the glovebox: Tuck Everlasting. You promised this one wouldn't make him cry which was the only way he agreed to read it because he couldn't handle another sad ending again. And, because he was a little too in love to think straight, he actually believed you.

He hadn't told you yet, though; it was way, way too early for him to feel this way at all, let alone tell you about it. For now, the two of you had something great going, and he didn't want to rush it. Well, he did want to rush it, but he knew he shouldn't, so he kept his feelings to himself for the time being.

//

You were heating up some Vietnamese leftovers on the stove (you’d taught Bucky to stop using the microwave to reheat noodles and now he would never go back) while your boyfriend relaxed on the couch, attempting to find something decent to watch with your meal.

“Hey, one of your movies is on later,” he noticed as he scrolled through the channels. “We could watch that.”

Maybe it was weird that you watched your own movies pretty often— after all, plenty of actors preferred to avoid seeing their own performance— but it made perfect sense to you; you took roles in the kinds of movies that you enjoyed watching and wanted to see more of. It wasn’t that you sought out something you’d been in to watch, and it definitely wasn’t that you didn’t cringe a little watching yourself, but you just happened to like a lot of the things that you’d been in. Plus, they brought back sweet memories. “Oh, which one?” you asked, focusing mainly on stirring the food in the wok.

“After Midnight,” he informed you, and your smile dropped.

“Oh. Um, I don’t like that one,” you dismissed quickly, “what else could we watch?”

“Really?” he pressed, unfortunately not following your segue. “It’s pretty popular… I never saw it, sorry, but I figured I should. Is it not good?”

“No, it’s good, it just—”

“Then what don’t you like about it?”

“Do you not know that I did that movie with Sam Wilson?” you finally blurted out.

“Oh…” he deflated slightly. “You two dated, didn’t you?”

“Yeah, over a year,” you remembered, sounding more somber than you intended.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bring up any bad memories,” he frowned, scratching the back of his neck awkwardly.

“No, it’s okay, it’s not bad memories,” you soothed.

“Well, I didn’t mean to bring up any good memories either,” he smirked. “I guess you guys were pretty serious?”

“I thought so,” you answered, leaving the silent second half hanging in the air: He didn’t.

“Kinda sucks you can’t watch your own movie just ‘cause your ex is in it,” he realized.

“Yeah, that one’s especially hard since that’s how we met and all… and I was basically the only person on the planet who didn’t watch Code Gray while it was on,” you remembered. “I mean, everyone was talking about it and I just had to smile and nod and try to ignore the big-ass billboards in LA with his face on them. You get used to that last part, though.”

“Maybe you get used to it, but I don’t think I will,” he admitted.

“I guess it’s easier when you’ve already seen your own face on a billboard,” you shrugged, turning off the stove and distributing the food into two bowls.

"That reminds me, I saw your perfume ad on the side of a skyscraper yesterday," he told you proudly.

"Oh yeah? How's it look?" you asked as you stuck some chopsticks into the food and brought it with you to the living room.

"Looks good, I guess, but it doesn't really look like you to me. You're so airbrushed I couldn't see all my favorite little details of your face," he admitted as you set the bowls on the coffee table.

"That's the nature of the game," you shrugged, joining him on the couch and relaxing against his chest as he embraced you.

“Dating in the public eye must be tough…” he mumbled. You twiddled your thumbs and wondered if that meant he didn’t want to go public with you. He must have sensed your discomfort; he always did. “What’s on your mind, beautiful?”

"Would you ever want to… you know… go public? I wouldn't blame you if you'd rather stay this way as long as possible—"

"What?!" he scoffed. "Baby… I don't care about the spotlight, for better or for worse, I just care about you. And I want to shout it from the fucking rooftops if you'll let me."

You grinned and snuggled up into his arms. “Really?”

“Yeah,” he hummed.

“We could, you know… start that process, if you wanted.”

“What about what you want?” he pressed instead.

“I want everybody to know,” you decided with a smile that you tried (and failed) to fight. “I want to be able to go out with you and not worry about who sees or how you touch me.”

He grinned and kissed you, gentle but a little bit less than innocent. "I want that too," he whispered.

"Then let's do it," you announced giddily. "But, let's have dinner first."

//

He was reading as he waited for you in bed, starting to pick up on the fact that you'd duped him into another heartbreaking read. He was about to confront you about it when you returned from the hallway, but you spoke first.

"I just got off the phone with my publicist," you informed him, "she thinks we should get papped together before I post about it on Instagram."

"'Get papped'?" he repeated incredulously as he slipped a bookmark between the pages and set the novel aside. "Is that some sort of hip slang for getting a pap smear because, I'll warn you now, I’m pretty sure anatomy dictates that we can't do that together."

"Paparazzi," you clarified unamusedly as you got in bed next to him. "She wants us to go to lunch or something and tip off a few photographers; it'll be in the gossip rags by tomorrow."

"God, being famous sounds weird as fuck," he shivered.

"You'll find out for yourself soon," you warned, half ominous and half humorous, as you laid your head on his chest. "You're gonna have your own following once this hits."

He grimaced a little, afraid of becoming slightly famous in his own rite just for dating you when he didn't actually have any talent worthy of attention or praise. “Oh god, I’m not gonna have to make an Instagram, am I?”

"No, but you might want to consider a tinted moisturizer," you pondered aloud as you suddenly examined his face closely.

He gently batted your hand away as you reached up to poke his cheek. "Okay, I get it, I'm old. Makeup ain't gonna fix that."

"You're not old," you laughed, "and it's not that there's anything wrong with your face, it's just that everybody looks washed out on camera and the magazines and their readers are fucking ruthless. If I go out without mascara they'll start running shit about how I'm turning into a crypt keeper. God forbid I wear a tight shirt after eating a massive burrito; they'll pick out baby names for me."

"Christ," he groaned.

"You still wanna do this right?" you asked quietly, shifting from joking to concerned so quickly.

"Of course," he assured, clutching your hand where it had been absent-mindedly rubbing over his chest hair. "Do you?"

"Yeah," you smiled, relaxing again. "I can't wait, honestly."

"Then let's do the lunch thing tomorrow. You have to help me pick what to wear, though." Your arms wrapped around his torso and hugged him tight. "Ooh, don't squeeze me so hard, I ate a lot of Vietnamese food," he frowned.

"Sorry," you giggled, still holding him close but applying less pressure. He wrapped his arm around your shoulders, instinctively stroking your arm with his thumb for a moment before leaning over to turn off the lamp on his bedside table.

Yes, his bedside table, with a drawer full of his stuff. Next to your bed. It was like his wildest (yet most domestic) fantasies coming true and he was beside himself about it.

"G'night," you whispered, cuddling up closer to him.

"Goodnight," he whispered back, planting a kiss on the top of your head. He stayed awake just long enough to hear your breathing and feel your heartbeat as they slowed down, only then allowed himself to fall asleep as well.

//

You'd convinced him to stick to his usual style of 90% leather and denim, while you opted for the classic "I'm famous but I'm pretending I'm normal but I'm definitely not" look of jeans and a t-shirt that looked casual but actually cost nearly a grand combined. It was the ideal look for allegedly-candid pap pics, in your mind; unfortunately, the ribs were wanted to order were not part of that look, and you frowned a little as you ordered your salad and gave the menu back to your waitress.

"I'll have the same," Bucky mumbled quickly and handed his menu over as well, the waitress nodding before she stepped away.

"Salad? Really?" you questioned, fixing your hair for a moment since the breeze had messed it up slightly; you had to sit outside for visibility reasons, and thankfully the weather was gorgeous, but you could do without the wind.

"I'm not stupid, I know better than to unhinge my jaw to eat a burger when I'm going to be photographed," he chuckled. "I'm not hungry anyways, I'm too nervous."

"Don't be nervous," you dismissed, "all you have to do is sit here and not suppress the instinct to act like my boyfriend."

He reached forward and rested his hand on top of yours on the table, stroking your wrist with his thumb. "How about this?"

You smiled a little, feeling your face warm; sometimes he made you feel all shy and giddy like that, just from the simplest things.

“So, when are the paparazzi getting here?” he asked, breaking the silence that you hadn't even really noticed before, too lost in your thoughts.

“They’re already here. Across the street, behind those bushes.”

“Wha— oh my god,” Bucky gasped as he craned his head to see there were, in fact, cameras obscured behind the foliage, “they’re good!”

“Yeah, it’s too bad they use their powers for evil most of the time,” you frowned. “Spent a lot of time and money trying to keep less flattering pictures out of the papers.”

“How ‘less flattering’ are we talking here?” he pressed with a raised eyebrow.

“Unfortunate angles while getting out of a car… maybe a rendezvous on a balcony that we thought was totally private…”

“Do I want to know who the ‘we’ was?”

“Nope,” you grinned. "That's all in the past now… and right now I'm here with you." For emphasis, you slipped one of your shoes off and playfully trailed your foot up his leg.

"Careful there, honey, or you're gonna end up with some more dirty pictures to bribe some sleaze into deleting," he warned with a smirk.

"Just gotta make sure these pictures make it clear we're not just friends," you explained, shrugging a little but wiggling your toes as you moved just past his knee before going back down and slipping your shoe on.

"Maybe we're just really, really good friends."

"Ever gotten this personal at lunch with a really, really good friend?" you asked playfully.

"No, I don't think so…"

"Ever had sex in the bathroom of a really fancy restaurant?" you added, voice dropping as you grinned.

"No, and I never will," he laughed, "because the chances of getting caught are astronomically too high. We literally came here for the express purpose of getting caught."

"Yeah, fair enough," you deflated slightly, taking another bite of your salad.

It was easy after that: just talking with him as naturally as you always did. He glanced over at the hidden photographers occasionally but you'd all but forgotten they were there.

"Well, I think our job here is done," you decided after a half hour had passed. You stood up from your chair and he followed suit, but he stopped you before you turned away.

"Not quite yet," he smirked as he pulled you closer and into a kiss— one that just barely pushed into 'a little too steamy for out in public' territory. Even so, he was the one that had to pull away first because you quickly got so lost in it that you would've let him go on forever. "Now we're done."

"Yep, that'll do it!" you laughed, hugging him quickly before dropping a fifty on the table (it was a 40% tip but who cares) and leading him back to the car.

//

His phone was already set to give him news updates about you, and he smirked when he checked it after dinner only to see your plan already in motion so easily.

New photos spark Y/N Y/L/N dating rumors

Is Y/N Y/L/N dating again after highly-publicized romance with ‘Code Gray’ star Sam Wilson?

‘Touch of Blood,’ ‘After Midnight’ Star Spotted At More-Than-Friendly Lunch with Her Bodyguard

Y/N Y/L/N and Mystery Guy Get Frisky Over Salads at Lazan Bistro In The Lower East Side

“Now we just have to wait until tomorrow,” you smirked. “Is it weird that I’m all jittery about it? I mean, it doesn’t really matter, cause we’re the only thing that matters, but—”

“No, it’s okay, I’m excited too,” he agreed, setting his phone down and wrapping his arms around your waist. “Although I am enjoying my last day of anonymity.”

“Soak it in, Bucky-boy, most of us don’t get the chance to really appreciate it before it’s gone,” you giggled. “You should go out and celebrate— go grocery shopping, see a movie, something I can’t do anymore.”

“If you can’t do it anymore, does that mean you’re not coming with me?”

“That’s sort of the point.”

“But I’ll miss you…”

“You’re so needy,” you rolled your eyes. “But I like it,” you added with a peck to his cheek.

“Need anything from the grocery store? Or the movie theater?”

“All I need is a kiss before you go,” you decided.

He purred and pulled you a little closer, ghosting his lips over your cheek. “Do I get to pick where it is?”

“Above the belt,” you scolded playfully.

“That still gives me plenty of options,” he smiled as he leaned down to lift your shirt up, deciding to place his slow, gentle kiss onto your nipple. He wrapped his lips around it carefully, circling his tongue around the bud as it hardened.

“Oh fuck,” you sighed, weaving your fingers into his hair.

He grinned and looked up at you, pulling away just a little too soon to hear your pretty whines. Who’s the needy one now? “Can I give you one more kiss, on the other one?”

“Only in the interest of symmetry,” you smirked, moaning when he moved to the other nipple and sucked it a little harder than the last. He let his teeth just barely graze the sensitive skin, your body jolting in his arms at the sensation.

“Oh, I bit this one but not the first one,” he realized, “so I’m gonna have to go back. For symmetry.”

He kissed his way back and gave a rough lap over it before sucking it between his lips and using his teeth just like he’d promised. “God, just fuck me.”

“Really? I thought you wanted me to go out without you,” he remembered.

“Later,” you sighed, “need you now.”

A prideful grin stretched over his face as he stood back up and held you tight, tapping your back to instruct you to jump into his arms and wrap your legs around his hips— which you did instinctively, much to his delight. “Okay, pretty girl, let’s get you to bed.”

#bucky barnes x reader #bodyguard!bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes smut #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x y/n

[somewhatgreatexpectations]

Writing’s On The Wall (Wanda Maximoff/ Reader)

Hello, again! We’ve finally reached... Civil War! Loosely inspired by Sam Smith’s “Writing’s On The Wall”. Some of the actual dialogue from the film is used here with some adjustments. Let me know what you think.

Summary: How the reader and Wanda are involved in the events of Civil War. Will they be on the same side? Or will they have to fight each other?

“I want to feel love, run through my blood, tell me is this where I give it all up? For you I have to risk it all, 'cause the writing's on the wall”

Half a year had passed since you left the comfort of the Avengers tower and the path to healing had never felt more manageable. You should have known that wouldn’t last. Peace never seemed to last around you. 

You didn’t know what to expect when Fury called you out of the blue and told you to turn on the news, but it was certainly not what you saw. A quiet curse escaped your lips as you watched the news of what happened in Lagos play out before you.

For at least an hour you listened to them completely annihilate Wanda’s character and talk about her like she was a monster who couldn’t be controlled. A threat. That couldn’t have been further from the truth. She made a mistake – she was trying to help. You could only imagine how she was feeling.

The news continued to pile on the next couple of days which is when you caught wind of the Sokovian accords. The information being relayed to you in the form of a demand from one Tony Stark who said you needed to sign since you were technically still an Avenger. You told him you would need time to think about it because the fact of the matter was, you didn’t agree with it. Not that you actually told him the second part. 

Shortly after your phone call with Stark, Steve also reached out. Though he was reluctant to have to ask you for help when he knew what he would be dragging you back into. You agreed within seconds. Not only was it what was right, but Steve was your first lifeline. You’d always offer him help. You’d always stand by him. You had made a promise. That’s just who you were.

Due to some loose ends, you were the last to arrive at the parking garage Steve had designated as the meeting location. 

The sight of Wanda before you after all this time shocked you and rendered you immobile for a moment. 

As if she could sense your presence, she looked over and made eye contact with you, her eyes widening ever so slightly. You shook your head, you had healed – moved on. She wasn’t your focus anymore. The look in her eyes stuck with you though, it was something you had never seen before. You could feel her eyes follow you. Even after all this time, it slightly hurt you still.

Wanda, on the other hand, felt breathless at the sight of you. The one she thought she’d never get to see again. She could feel her heart beating so hard in her chest she was sure everyone in the area could hear it. It took everything in her not to run over to you, take you in her arms and never let go. Even after all this time, she missed you still. 

“Cap, what have you gotten yourself into now?” you questioned playfully, smiling brightly when Steve turned to look at you.

Despite the circumstance, Steve was genuinely glad to see you, to physically see how much better you looked after your time away rather than just hear it in a phone call. “Y/n. I hate how this is how we’re being reunited but it’s good to see you.” He pulled you into a tight embrace which you gladly returned. 

For the first time in her life, Wanda envied Steve Rogers. 

When he released you, Steve turned and addressed everyone else. “Alright everyone, go and get ready. Time is of the essence… And I can’t imagine they’re going to let us go easily.”

Before you could walk away, Steve threw a duffle bag at you with a wink before he walked off to put on his suit. You looked into the bag and noticed a sleek black outfit with blue and white accents. New gear, you thought to yourself, nice.

“Hi, Y/n.” you heard an all too familiar voice say softly from behind you. 

With only slight hesitation, you turned. “Hello, Wanda.” You greeted neutrally, proud of yourself for not feeling as broken as you once did at the mere sight of her. 

Wanda smiled slightly at you, her nerves at an all-time high from being this close to you once again. “I’m surprised to see you here. You look… good.” She said shyly. 

An amused smile spread over your lips. “Thanks. I thought I told you I’d always be on your side.” You said with a wink. The referenced conversation felt as though it had happened in another life. 

A pink hue covered her cheeks which you took note of curiously. “I’m actually glad you are.” She admitted honestly. “I’ve had a lot of time to think these last few months and it’s made me realize that I-“

“I’m genuinely sorry to do this, ladies, but we’ve really got to go.” Steve interrupted. Looking apologetically at Wanda who appeared disheartened.

You waved your hand dismissively. Allowing yourself to get invested in even just a conversation with Wanda wasn’t something you’d allow yourself. “Not an issue at all, Cap.” You replied lightly, pretending you didn’t see the way Wanda’s looked down dejectedly. In that moment you wished you didn’t know her so well.

Once you were all gathered, Steve separated you all into teams that would be spread throughout the airport, Clint and Wanda would be together, Sam would stay with Bucky and you would be with Steve. Scott would be waiting in hiding for when the perfect opportunity presented itself. Without knowing all the variables, it was difficult to form a perfect plan, but you all worked with what you had. Once that was settled, it was time to get into position. 

“Y/n.” Wanda took hold of your hand as you were turning to leave. “Do you think we could finish that conversation later, whenever that may be?” She asked hopefully. You took note of how she was holding her breath.

“Sure, Wanda.” You eventually replied, watching the way she breathed out graciously. “I’ve got to get into position now though, Steve is already out there.” 

Wanda lightly squeezed the hand that you hadn’t realized she was still holding. Awkwardly, you pulled it away. A short look of disappointed flashed across her features. “Be careful out there, okay?”

“You too.” You replied neutrally, this conversation was veering into dangerous territory. With one final nod you took off in a sprint to get into position, not seeing the way Wanda stayed behind for a moment. 

Even just the minor action made her aware of the fact that you’d changed, you used to always look back. She looked at your retreating figure with worried eyes until it disappeared from sight.

Almost as soon as you got into position, you could hear Sam begin calling you over the coms. “Y/n, go out to Steve, give them some numbers. Remember your points and the mission.”

“Haven’t been out of the game that long, Wilson.” You replied with an eye roll before heading out to where Steve was trapped.

The end of Tony’s speech caught your attention. “… in Clint, rescuing Wanda from a place she doesn’t even want to leave, a safe place-“ His words halted as you came to a stop by Steve’s side.

For a moment Tony just looked between you and Steve, obviously surprised to see you there. “And you brought the kid back into the chaos for this? To make her a criminal? Real nice, Rogers.” Tony quipped angrily.

Steve opened his mouth to respond when you beat him to it. “I can speak for myself, thanks. Hi Tony, good to see you again.” You matched his sarcasm with a mocking wave of your fingers. “If it means I can fight for what’s right then I’ll gladly join the fray again.”

“You heard her.” Steve replied with a small chuckle. 

Wanda couldn’t help but watch you with a small smile of admiration from her position. She truly missed being able to see this version of you. Always determined to do what was right. Clint shook his head in amusement at her but didn’t say anything.

From your place you could see Tony’s frustration grow as he addressed Steve again. “I’m trying to keep you from tearing the Avengers apart.”

“You did that when you signed.” Steve replied coolly.

Tony looked away before looking back at Steve, his anger more present. “Alright, we’re done. You’re going to turn Barnes over and you’re going to come with us. Now. Because it’s us.” He paused slightly. “C’mon…” he added, and you almost felt bad for Tony.

Over your coms you could hear Sam let you both know that he had found the quinjet. That’s when chaos ensued. Your focus was keeping Rhodey back from Steve when you saw Tony begin shooting at Wanda and Clint, with a flick of your wrist Rhodey sunk into the floor, completely encased in the concrete that was once flat underneath his feet. 

The sound of his suit slowly chipping away at the defense let you know that it wasn’t too damaging as you began running towards Tony, using your powers to propel you forward. That was until a truck got thrown right in your path and exploded mere inches from you. You ducked and rolled, jumping back up. “C’mon.” you mumbled to yourself. Noticing the red wisps that surrounded you during the explosion.

You made eye contact with Wanda, who’s eyes were worried as she lowered her hands, the red wisps that were lingering around you fading. You nodded in thanks, Wanda just quirked her lips up and nodded back.

“Sorry!” Scott said sheepishly to you over coms. 

You refocused and noticed the path to the quinjet clear for you all, each of you sprinting in its direction. 

The quinjet was quickly approaching as each of you sped up even more until a beam of light cut into the ground before you, effectively stopping you all in your tracks. 

“For the collective good, you must surrender now.” Vision said, his eyes on Wanda whose expression never changed. Each member of Tony’s team formed a defensive line in front of the jet. 

Both sides were in a stand-off, and it was obvious neither was willing to back down. “What do we do, Cap?” you questioned. 

“We fight.” Steve said without a moment of hesitation, determination clear in his eyes as he began running forward. Everyone else followed suit, both teams clashing in the middle.

The scene was so frenzied, and your focus was on fighting Tony with your powers that it wasn’t until Sam spoke over coms that you focused in again. You easily agreed with the plan that not all of you could make it out. It had to be Steve and Bucky. 

The sound of Wanda’s scream distracted you, thankfully Scott had also distracted Tony just in time. 

“Wanda!” You shouted on reflex already beginning to run over when you saw her fall to the floor, clutching her head. You were able to catch the building that was falling on Steve and Bucky with your powers for a moment before allowing it to crash down behind them. 

When you turned your attention back to Wanda, you noticed Vision come to a stop beside her and take her in his arms. The conversation between them looked intimate. She looked up from her place in his arms for a moment and met your eyes. Her eyes looked as though they were trying to convey something to you when they had suddenly gone wide as you felt a strong force make contact with your head then everything went black. 

When you finally came to your head felt groggy and achy, the way it did when Hydra used to run experiments on you. You tried to lift a hand to rub at your head when you noticed resistance and something cool around your neck. Out of confusion, your eyes shot open only to feel anxiety seep into your bones when you took note of the straight jacket that you were confined in and the collar locked uncomfortably around your neck.

“Hello?” you called, hating the way fear crept into your voice.

“Y/n. You’re awake.” You heard Wanda respond, relief obvious in her voice. You looked around for a moment trying to locate her voice when you finally noticed her across a brightly lit circular sort of area, in her own straight jacket and collar. Her eyes that were so bright before the battle now dull.

Fruitlessly you tried to use your powers to manipulate the walls of the cell to no avail. “Where are we?”

“They call it the raft.” You heard Clint’s bitter voice float through the walls. “We’re criminals now.”

The anxiety you felt began to overwhelm you as flashes of being tied up in a similar manner and watching someone you loved be harmed went through your mind. “How long have we been here?”

“Three days,” Wanda began hesitantly almost as if she wasn’t sure if she wanted to tell you more. 

Clint interrupted her. “They’ve been knocking you out each time you come to, even for a second. First, they doped you up. The last time they just hit you. They’re not big fans of Steve over here, you’re the closest they could get to him.” Anger was clear in his words. 

You thought you heard him mumble something about putting Wanda directly across from you, so she’d be forced to watch. 

Wanda looked resigned with purple bruising under her eyes. You were hesitant to ask. “What happened to you?” she shook her head.

Thankfully Sam answered for her. “They’re not big fans of her either. The one good thing Tony did was stop what they were doing to both of you.”

Before you could ask anything else, the sound of the door opening caught your attention, all of your attention it seemed. A moment later, Steve walked in, a relieved smile on his face as he took in each of you. 

“About time.” Sam said gruffly.

Without hesitation Steve began taking you each out of your cell and loaded onto the jet he had waiting. 

You were watching the prison shrink in the distance from the safety of the quinjet when you felt someone take a seat next to you. You didn’t need to look to know who it was.

“Do you think we can have that talk now?”

Part 8! Don’t worry there’s more to come, I’m just releasing one title ahead at a time. This part was semi-difficult to write because I didn’t want to add too much of the fight scene because then it would be extremely long and this was more of a set-up chapter for Wanda and the readers story. To establish where they are after separating and bring them back into each others lives. Anyway, as always, hope you all enjoyed! Comments and thoughts always welcome. :) (bonus points if you can tell me what part was referenced in this chapter ;)

#wanda maximoff #wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff x you #wanda marvel #wanda maximov #wanda #wanda x you #wanda x y/n #wanda x reader #wandavision x reader #wandavision #marvel #marvel x reader #marvel x y/n #mcu x y/n #mcu x reader #wanda mcu #wanda maximoff fic #wanda maximoff fanfiction #wanda maximoff imagine

[new-sandrafilter]

How Timothée Chalamet Channeled The Blockbuster Pressure of Leading Denis Villeneuve’s ‘Dune’ Back Into His Role – Venice Q&A

DEADLINE: In a few days Dune will premiere at the Venice Film Festival. You first met Denis Villeneuve about the role in May 2018 and started shooting in the early half of 2019. It was always going to be a long journey, but the pandemic stretched it even further. How does it feel to have finally arrived at this moment?

TIMOTHÉE CHALAMET: You know, I like to think that with every film I’ve done, whether it’s Call Me by Your Name or Beautiful Boy, The King, or Little Women, the character you play is almost a piece of your flesh. And that’s always true, but simply from the perspective of how long the shoot for Dune was, and also the arc that Paul Atreides is on, as well as the huge love and almost biblical connection that so many people have for the book and the original film, it really felt… tectonic, if that’s the right word for it. Just getting to this finish line feels like: phew.

And independent of what the film is now, and what it has become, the experience of making it was I was put in such a safe environment, which you can never take for granted as a human, as an actor, but especially when you’re just starting your career, and when this is the first film of this size you’ve ever done.

To get to work with Denis on it, to get to work with someone of his caliber, let alone on a book that he considers the book of his youth and one of the things he has connected to the most… When he would have it in his hands on set, his body language would become that of a fan; of a kid who had fallen in love with the book at home in Montreal. And when all the kids around him were wearing hockey jerseys with their favorite players’ names on the back, this was a kid wearing a jersey that said ‘Spielberg’ on the back.

For it all to come together, especially with the added challenge of the pandemic, it has all combined to make this moment feel especially spicy [laughs].

DEADLINE: The entire ensemble will show up in Venice.

CHALAMET: Right. And I just can’t believe it; Jason Momoa has the number one film on Netflix right now with Sweet Girl, which I just watched. And since we shot, Zendaya has had all this success with Euphoria and Malcolm & Marie. Just to be part of this cast, period, let alone as one of the title characters, it’s really the shit you dream of.

And let me not forget, too—and I know I’ve told you this before—that The Dark Knight was the movie that made me want to act. That movie had a score by Hans Zimmer, and he has done the score for Dune. And it’s almost not what you’d think. It’s totally appropriate and excellent for the movie, but he has somehow managed to do something subversive, in my opinion. It’s a pinch-me moment all over.

DEADLINE: So, take me back to the start. Is it true you had a Google alert set up to track the latest news on this project before you were ever cast?

CHALAMET: Yeah, it’s true [laughs]. Not right away—Legendary had the rights and was developing it—but as soon as Denis got involved, I set up a Google alert and that’s when I got the book.

In total honesty, I think my understanding of Dune at that point was from a graphic novel I’d seen at Midtown Comics when I was shopping for Yu-Gi-Oh! cards when I was about 10. The year you and I first met, when I was there at Deadline Contenders with Call Me by Your Name, that would have been 2017 or early 2018, and Denis was there with Blade Runner. I remember I was trying to put myself in front of him as much as possible and set up a meeting with him. We had a night at the BAFTA where one of my good friends, Stéphane Bak—who’s also an actor—saw Denis across the room and was like, “Hey buddy, he’s right over there.” So, we went over to talk to him. I kept trying to put myself in front of him, but I didn’t really get a sense of the possibility [of working with him].

I was about halfway through the book when I got the call that he was going to be the president of the jury at the Cannes Film Festival, and I was in London prepping The King. He asked me if I could come out there, so I quickly busted through the second half of the book as best I could. So, like, the first half of my copy is properly annotated and full of my thoughts, and then the second half I just raced through. And then I had that meeting with him, and it was such a joy.

I’m struggling with this even now, as I’m working with Paul King [on Wonka], because he’s another guy I have huge respect and admiration for, and it’s hard to feel on a level. Not that you ever are, because as an actor you’re a cog in the machine, and you’ve got to be humble to the vision of the director. But with Denis, he was pacing around the room, throwing ideas around, in some fancy suite in Cannes, and all I could think was that a year before I was just sat on a stoop on 9th Street in the East Village or something.

DEADLINE: Was that your first time in Cannes?

CHALAMET: Yeah. Well, bizarrely, my sister would do dance camps growing up. Ballet intensive programs in a town called Mougins, which is nearby Cannes, so I spent a lot of time there growing up, but never during the festival, and not on the Riviera. To get to be there for the festival was just nuts. I went to see the Romain Gavras movie, I think, and it was just a huge joy.

I got attached [to the role in Dune] a couple of months after that, and it was nerve-wracking from the announcement, because like I said before, the fans of the book, and the fans of David Lynch version, the computer game, and everything, there’s so much love and strength of feeling. And so much of our pop culture and films and books have been derived from Dune, and all the philosophy the book. I’ve been shocked to learn how many people have a next-level connection to the book. I compare it to how our generation grew up with Harry Potter, and that one makes sense to me. But it’s cool to see with Dune also, when you actually sit down and read it… It’s not that it’s a quote-unquote “hard read” or anything, but it’s not made to be consumed easily, I think that’s fair to say.

So, I was grateful to be working on something of this size not only with Denis Villeneuve leading it, who between Polytechnique, Incendies and Prisoners had nailed the smaller indie film across languages, and then had nailed Arrival and Blade Runner, but who, in his own words, he didn’t feel he’d made his greatest film yet. But also, to be working with this cast. I don’t know if there’s some nightmare version of a film where a young lead is not supported by the rest of his cast, where every one of them had been the leads in their own huge projects. But on this, everyone was there to support, and I think it’s because we all wanted to be foot soldiers for Denis, and I think we understood the potential, based on the script by Eric Roth, Jon Spaihts and Denis, that this could be something really special.

DEADLINE: I don’t have a connection to Dune; this movie is really my first experience of the story. What strikes me is this is clearly an enormous universe—a broad canvas being painted with various families and factions and politics and mythos—but that ultimately it comes down to very elemental, human themes, and we feel them through this character you play, Paul Atreides. Did those themes help ground the experience for you?

CHALAMET: Yes, and I would give the credit entirely to Denis. He would constantly say on set that he had some opposing drumbeat or something. In my diminished intellectual standing, I didn’t understand it, but it was like some vision for the movie based on how biblical the book is that tries to tackle so much that it doesn’t tackle anything. I think he felt the need to be close to a character in it, and Paul is that guy in the book. He’s a character that is still in formation, like a lump of clay, which makes him a great figure for the audience to mirror off.

It speaks, I think, to Denis’ premonition and his directing ability that there were times when we’d move on from a shot or move on from a scene, and I swear, literally, we’d go back because Denis wanted to get something over my shoulder, or push in on my reaction, just to make sure [it stayed on Paul].

And again, it’s something where I’m pinching myself. I had the best time on Interstellar, and that was one of my favorite films I’ve ever worked on, but it was very much something where I was aware of when I had the opportunity to do real acting. And on a movie like Dune, again, one could think it would get lost in the scale and scope. But I felt every day like my plate was full.

DEADLINE: One of those themes is fear, and Paul must overcome his to become the person he needs to be. When you are number one on the call sheet on a project of this scale, and the cast list reads like an address book of Hollywood in the 21st century, and Legendary has injected hundreds of millions of dollars into this production, and it’s all falling on your shoulders, I have to imagine fear is a theme you can readily relate to.

CHALAMET: Oh yeah, and they can bleed into each other for sure—not to diminish the other work that goes in. It’s great when your life experience can inform the role. That’s not at all to say I’m on some crusade in the universe or anything, but definitely… And I had that same good fortune with The King I think. My life is not nearly as significant or as exciting as Paul or Prince Hal, but we all share an unwitting needle in the haystack feeling. On The King that feeling was because I was so new to having a career. On Dune it’s because of, as you say, just feeling the pressure of the hugeness of the project in all those different ways. Those things can absolutely inform each other.

And then there are the moments of glee that come, too, like seeing Jason Momoa running at you at a hundred miles an hour, or just getting to shoot the shit with Josh Brolin, or getting to do a scene with Oscar Isaac. I felt so supported, whether it was Rebecca Fergusson or Charlotte Rampling. When Zendaya came, it was a total breath of fresh air, and she’s one of my favorite parts of the movie. I just got really lucky, and I can’t wait to see them all in Venice.

Denis split the book in half, and the hope is a second movie will get a greenlight. That’d expand Zendaya’s role in the story.

CHALAMET: Definitely, Chani will play a huge role in the next film. I don’t know if there’s a script yet, but just based on the book, along with Lady Jessica [Rebecca Fergusson], they have a lot to do together, let’s put it like that. And Zendaya was incredible in this movie; the moment she pulls the mask down, it felt properly showstopping and powerful. I was hiding behind the camera, counting my lucky starts, because I was there in month two of the shoot and here was a total powerhouse just coming in for the first time.

And as I said before, this was before I’d seen Euphoria and Malcolm & Marie. She’s doing such incredible work and is just trailblazing her own path, and she’s so, so cool. She also happens to be in the most-watched trailer of the moment, too, for Spider-Man: No Way Home. I cannot wait for that movie, and I was there, by the way, with everybody else, clicking through the trailer frame by frame looking for clues [laughs].

#timmy #timothee chalamet #dune movie #dune 2021 #denis villeneuve

[potato-with-hair]

Fake News

First tumblr Story Ever

As the newest Avenger it seemed that Tony Stark and Captain Rogers were more than comfortable sending you out on all of the shit missions, granted, you could use the time in with your new teammates to learn their little quirks and start working to meld your abilities with theirs so that you could start working together seamlessly, but it was getting ridiculous. You were half expecting to start getting told to go out and help the NYFD rescue kittens from trees and helping the NYPD direct traffic on Broadway in Manhattan during rush hour. Y/N was a technopath, which was a fancy name for someone who could control technology and anything mechanical with their mind, or if you wanted to be technical about it, according to the official S.H.I.E.L.D. dossier:

Y/L/N, Y/N: Main Ability: Technology Manipulation

User can manipulate technology, the sum of techniques, skills, methods, and

processes used in the production of goods or services or in the accomplishment

of objectives. However, most users only can exert control over technological

constructs, such as computers, robots, hardware, and other devices that can be

termed as "technology", in any way. Manifested as a special form of electrical/telekinetic manipulation, a special form of "morphing" which allows physical interaction with machines, or even a psychic ability that allows mental interface with computer data.

Also Called:

· Cyberkinesis

· Cyberpathy

· Mechanokinesis

· Technokinesis

· Technopathy

Pretty cool, huh? Anyway, spring was coming to a close and summer was just around the corner. Tony asked me and Sam Wilson, you may know him as Falcon, to head to midtown

Manhattan because there were some “unsavory” characters hanging around Grand Central Station.

Turns out it was some low-level HYDRA minions that were basically trying to see what kind of trouble they could cause, they had planted a pipe bomb in a waste bin in the middle of the station and it was a Friday when thousands of people would be traveling through the station heading to and from work and school. I think that HYDRA was more or less just testing us Avengers out to what abilities we had and see if there are any hidden capabilities we possessed before they come at us for a full-scale attack.

Sam and I arrived and were able to find the pipe bomb relatively quickly, part of my ability is being able to read the signatures of different technologies and mechanics, and if you don’t think that a bomb countdown timer throws out a red flag, you are mistaken. Anyway, we found it, and rather than call bomb and arson with New York’s Finest, I was able to manipulate the mechanics myself using my mind. I shut down the detonator without ever touching the bomb and made the whole thing inactive within a few minutes time.

Easy peasy, 10 minutes, another fast sweep which took an additional 30 minutes, and Sam and I were finished and ready for our close-ups from the media that always, inevitably followed. We had a small group of media that always showed up whenever a call went out that an Avenger was “working” and there was almost always a small fan base at Grand Central or where ever we were working who would come up to thank us, like we were some sort of rock stars, and as per usual some of the younger men and women took the opportunity to do some flirting with us. Tony told us, unattached Avengers, that any publicity and light flirting and playfulness with the fans was good publicity and would help for the public to relate to us and see us in a positive light. I am not going to lie, I may or may not have had a little thing for our resident speedy Sokovian, but our little flirting in the compound never seemed to go beyond that, flirting. I thought there was a possibility he liked me also, but, so far, nothing. Although I did catch him staring at me quite often and Wanda and some of the guys were always talking to him and then immediately looking in her direction like they were just discussing her. Pietro did seem to always try to be around me and sit near me as often as possible as well. Also when the “fans” would flirt with him, I noticed he never really showed much interest in them, always watching to see what I was doing.

Oh well, time to spend a little time with the crowd before Sam and I headed back to the compound. The New York Times was talking to some travelers about the pipe bomb that was found in the wastebasket and what their thoughts were and how they felt about us being there to “save the day, yet again” when an overzealous “fan” started to get a little handsy with me in the background. He had followed me around and asked me to dinner a few times, flashing cash and his business card a few times, trying to press it into my hand multiple times. I explained I was really bust and thanked him but said I was not interested or available, but he kept perusing me. He was leaning over my shoulder with his hand around my waist from behind, body pulled directly flush with my back and he was in an excited state if you know what I mean, and he was whispering in my ear about some of his fantasies and things that he has dreamt of doing to me. Of course, the camera flashed right as he started to kiss my neck and I had a smile on my face because I was focusing on a sweet 10 year old in front of me asking for my autograph and telling me I was her favorite avenger. If the camera had waited all of 5 seconds more, they would have caught me performing a minor assault on the prick and another 5 seconds would have caught Sam pulling me off of him and flying us out of the station and back to the compound with his hand over my mouth because I let lose a string of explicative’s that would put Wade Wilson to shame.

The next morning I woke up and took a shower, went down to the kitchen and made my normal toast and juice and bowl of fruit, and could not help notice that the Avengers that were there were looking at me strangely, I thought it was because I was still in a sour mood because of that jerk from yesterday and the icky feeling he gave me that I was assaulted by scum. I knew that Rogers, Wanda, Sam, and Nat were on their way to Lagos on a mission. Thor and Banner were MIA since Sokovia, which left Stark, Rhodey, Vision, Pietro and I still here.

“Y/N, so, how was the pipe bomb incident yesterday?” Tony asked seemingly hinting at something

“Uneventful aside from a slight annoyance in the crowd, is there coffee left?” Y/N responded looking at him while rising to get a mug and pour a hot mug to clear the remaining sleep from my head.

“Nothing happened? Nobody special you want to tell us about?” Rhodey chimes in.

“Not that I am aware of or worth mentioning now that it’s done and over with, is there something you would like to tell me about?” Y/N asks looking back and forth to them. “Hey, where’s Speedy, he’s usually down here eating everything that isn’t trying to eat him first.”

Tony looks at Y/N and smirks, “It is strange that you should mention that, he came in about 20 minutes ago, I assume you were in the shower or I am sure you would have heard him, saw the cover of the New York Times, flipped out and, well, here you are, please take a look, we are on pins and needles to know what you think. And I hope you know that all suitors must meet the full team before you becoming an “item” and pass Avenger inspection, and Rogers is particularly tough.” He slid the paper across the kitchen island to where you sat, both he and Rhodey watching your face for a reaction. You unfolded the paper confused and looked at the front cover.

There in black and white at you was a close up of the stranger with his arms around your waist from behind, you leaning slightly forward smiling and the stranger kissing your neck, the little girl you were smiling at was covered by the person being interviewed in the foreground. To someone who was not there and did not know the story, this definitely looked bad, like a very intimate moment caught on film, the headline read ‘Newest Avenger Moving Fast With New York Wall Street Trader’ the article went on to talk about how you just met the guy and did not bother to get his name, but just let him put the moves on you, yadda, yadda, yadda. Apparently, after Sam got you out of there, the “gentleman: in question decided to make a name for himself and gave a short interview making it sound like you approached him and started the whole flirt fest, lead him on, and then abandoned him, with the promise to return. You looked at Tony and Rhodey with wide eyes and a sick feeling in your stomach, “This is the biggest load of shit I have ever read in my life, this is not anything at all what happened. About 3 seconds after this picture was snapped, I basically slapped the taste out of his mouth and would have continued to do so had Sam not gotten me out of there. Flirting? More like this guy assaulted me. This was not consensual or wanted. I told him multiple times I was not interested and refused his advances and invitations to dinner and he kept bothering me. I was talking to a little kid and he pulled this crap when I had my back turned to him.”

Tony went from joking to serious almost instantly, “Okay, we were just going to bust your balls on this a little bit, but this has just become a non-joke. I’ll have Pepper contact someone in Stark Industries legal department to get in touch with the paper to track this guy down, he’ll have had to sign a waiver for publication and we’re going to go after him for liable and harassment. If he tries to come after you for battery for the assault, well, we’ll call that defense, Avenger or not, no one gets to touch you without permission. Y/n we really didn’t know, we were just going to play around with you about this a little, and we had no idea. He didn’t do any weird stuff, right?”

“NO, I mean, I slapped him and Sam pulled me off of him and flew me out of there, anything beyond what he did to me and you would have been getting a call from New York’s finest about bail or my court hearing for homicide. I was shocked, but if it had gone beyond what it was, I would have raged a lot harder than I did. The headline in the paper would have read a lot differently today.” Y/N responded.

“Alright, I know that yesterday was weird and I know that Nat and Wanda have had to deal with crap like this from time to time, unfortunately being an attractive woman on the team seems to let the guys out there think that it is open season to treat you ladies like meat. It is unfair and it sucks and if any of the men on the team are around just say the word and well step in and make sure the guys know it’s not okay, or step back and let you take care of it yourself, whatever you feel more comfortable with. In the meantime, take the weekend off and go to a spa or go shopping or to the movies or whatever you need to do to feel better, charge everything to Stark okay. Just let us know if you need anything alright.” Tony hugged you with one arm and kissed the top of your head. “One thing though, Lightning Legs. He flipped out when he saw this. He thought it was true and got hot and bothered. I would suggest finding him and letting him know what is really going on because the last thing you need right now is a crazy Sokovian kid acting like a jealous boyfriend right now.”

You look us at Tony and across the island to Rhodey, “What is that all about, what is he flipping out about, he brags about all the women he is into and dated back in Sokovia all the time, what does he care about what happens to me?”

“Y/N are you serious? That kid has been crazy in love with you since Sokovia. I swear I was coming close to sending you both on a mission that involved a tropical island and a case of rum soon. If he’s not staring at you, you are staring at him. It’s sickening.” Tony finished with a sarcastic eye roll. Go relax in your room, we'll take care of this. Just try to put it from your mind and well talk soon. With that, you left and headed to the elevator bank to the sleeping quarters level, feeling shitty, but better because you knew Tony would do what he could to help.

You were only in your Bedroom Suite for about half an hour when there was a somewhat frantic knocking at your door. You got up from your bed, put down the book you were currently reading, and made your way to the door, opening it, you found a seemingly tormented Pietro, he entered your quarters without an invitation and started to pace the length of your room, looking at you, Y/N could tell he needed to speak, but he was not sure where or how to start.

“Y/N, I ……. The newspaper, I saw the picture and…… Who is he? Do you like him? I mean does he make you happy? I want you to be happy……… I know that no one will ever be able to………. Not like I do………” Pietro kept starting and stopping sentences, never actually completing any, and getting agitated. You had never seen him this disconcerted before, he was always so unruffled when he would flirt with you before and this was a whole new side to him that you had never seen before. It was like he was unsure of himself and it was not something he was sure of how to process. You walked towards where Pietro was walking seemingly carrying on an argument with himself and reached out for his hands.

“Pietro, please stop, okay, please. It is not what you think, I don’t know that guy. It was fake, it was false, I don’t know him, I did not ask for that, I did not tell him it was okay to touch me or kiss me like that, I was not alright with that, He did that without my permission, and the photographer took a picture and they wrote some fake story to make it seem like I was into it. I did not want that. I don’t know him, I feel disgusted by that.” You start to rub your neck where the creep kissed you, sat down on the plush cushioned ottoman bench at the foot of your bed and start to curl into yourself to make yourself as small as possible as Pietro looks at you taking in your words.

“Wait, moja bohyňa (my goddess,) some guy you do not know came up to you and started to touch you and kiss you without your permission? No, I will not allow this, who is this man; I will go fight him right now. Žiadny odpadok sa nemôže dotknúť mojej bohyne bez jej súhlasu. Nikomu by nemalo byť dovolené pozerať sa na ňu bez toho, aby sa poďakoval bohom, že bola stvorená. (No trash can touch my goddess without her consent. No man should ever be allowed to look on her, without thanking the gods that she was created.) Are you okay?” He sat on the bench next to you giving you plenty of space, not wanting to crowd you. “I will kill this man, why would he think he could touch you, Bohyňa (Goddess,) if I had been there, I would have stopped him immediately, I am so sorry I was not there with you. “ Pietro sat staring forward with a look of disappointment in himself. You leaned over towards him putting your head on his shoulder and he wrapped his arm around you pulling you into him. You snuggled your face into his chest drawing designs on his stomach and chest with your finger as he kissed your head and held you close.

“Tony is going to get the Legal department of Stark Industries to look into the paper and find out who the guy is and get him charged with harassment, and I may or may not have given him a good slap as soon as I got over my shock and realized what was happening, so I figure I should let the cops know everything in case he decided to try to press charges later for battery saying I attacked him. But I promise Pietro, there is absolutely nothing at all going on with that guy or any other guy in my life because I was sort of waiting for someone I had a sort of thing for to maybe make a move, but I didn’t think that he was interested, so I had basically given up hope and just accepted that we would only be friends, and that was okay, but I really was hoping he would let me know he felt the same.” You continued tracing symbols on Pietro's chest with her fingers nervously

Pietro put his hand gently under Y/Ns chin and raised her face so that his clear blue eyes were looking directly into Y/N/E/C, “Do I know this guy?” He asked finally deciding to go with the advice the rest of the team when they told him that Y/N was definitely into him, and Wanda assured him that yes, Y/N thought about him often and was only too nervous to make the first move, but if Pietro would, she would be receptive.

Y/N looks from Pietro's eyes to his lips and back to his eyes again and states “I am sure you have seen him around here, sometimes he’s hard to spot because he’s pretty fast, but when he stops or slows down and doesn’t try so hard to impress everyone he’s really an amazing guy. I have to say to, he is sexy as hell too, and he has this accent when he talks, uggghhh, it does things to me.” Y/N just smiles at him teasingly.

Pietro chuckles and smiling leans in but says softly before he kisses you, “Prednesiem vám básne a texty, ak ma chcete počuť hovoriť, poviem vám všetky veci, ktoré chcem s vami a s vami urobiť, ale nikdy vám nebudem môcť vyjadriť, ako veľmi vás milujem a uctievam. Teraz si môj, ako ja tvoj, navždy. (I will recite you poetry and lyrics if you want to hear me speak, I will tell you all the things I want to do to you and with you, but I will never be able to express to you, how much I love and worship you. You are mine now as I am your, forever.)” He then lays the softest and most soul-baring kiss on Y/N that she has ever felt. It was as if all the passions in the world could have been transferred to her through that kiss and as he softly caresses her face while peppering gentle kisses on her face, Y/N thinks that maybe this stupid picture is not the worst thing in the world to ever happen to her if it is what FINALLY brought her and Pietro together, she figures if nothing else, this will be a brilliant story to tell their kids someday.

Slovakian substituted for Sokovian

Y/N = Your Name

Y/L/N = Your Last Name

Y/N/E/C = Your Eye Color

#pietro marvel #pietro x reader #pietro x you #pietro x y/n #pietro maximoff #pietro fluff #Pietro jealous #slight dubcon #fluff

[bewitching-elizabeth-olsen]

Press/Gallery: How Elizabeth Olsen Brought Marvel From Mainstream to Prestige

“The thing I love about being an actor is to fully work with someone and try so hard to be at every level with them, chasing whatever it is you need or want from them.”

  GALLERY LINKS

Studio Photoshoots > 2021 > Session 008 Magazine Scans > 2021 > Backstage (August 19)

Backstage: Elizabeth Olsen grins widely over video chat when recalling many such moments on set with her co-stars. Yet, she can’t bring herself to divorce such a lofty vision of film acting from the technical multitasking it requires. The camera sees all.

“But then you move your hair, and you’re in your brain, like: OK, remember that! Because I don’t want to edit myself out of a shot. I know some actors are like, ‘Continuity, shmontinuity!’ But the good thing about continuity is, if you remember it, you’re actually providing yourself with more options for the edit.”

That need to balance being both inside the scene and outside of it, fully living it and yet constantly visualizing it on a screen, feels particularly apt in light of Olsen’s most recent project, “WandaVision.”

The mysteries at the heart of the show grow with every episode, each fast-forwarding to a different decade: Could this 1950s, black-and-white, “filmed in front of a studio audience” newlyweds bit be a grief-stricken dream? Might this ’70s spoof be a powerful spell gone awry? Could this meta take on mockumentary comedies be proof that the multiverse is finally coming to the Marvel Cinematic Universe?

The series’ structure, which branches out to include government agents intent on finding out why Westview has seemingly disappeared, calls for the entire cast to play with a mix of genres, balancing a shape-shifting tone that culminates in an epic, MCU-style conclusion. What’s key—and why the show struck a chord with audiences during its nine-episode run—is the miniseries’ commitment to grounding its initial kooky setups and its later special effects-driven spectacle in heartbreaking emotional truths. It’s no small feat, though it’s one that can often be taken for granted.

“I was thinking how hard it would have been to have shot the first ‘Lord of the Rings,’ ” Olsen muses. “Like, you’re putting all these actors [into the frame] later and at all these different levels. All the eyelines are completely unnatural. And yet the performances are fantastic! And technically, they are so hard. People forget sometimes that these things are really technically hard to shoot. And if you are moved by their performance, that took a lot of multitasking.”

As someone who has learned plenty about harnesses, wirework, fight choreography, and green screens (she’s starred in four Marvel movies, including the box office megahit “Avengers: Endgame,” after all), Olsen knows how hard it can be to wrap one’s brain around the work needed to pull off those big, splashy scenes.

“​​If you think about it, it’s, like, the biggest stakes in the entire world—every time. And that feels silly to act over and over again, especially when people are in silly costumes and the love of your life is purple and sparkly, and every time you kiss them, you have to worry about getting it on your hands. Those things are ridiculous. You feel ridiculous. So there is a part of your brain that has to shovel that away and just look into someone’s eyeballs—and sometimes, they don’t even have eyeballs!”

The ability to spend so much time with Wanda, albeit in the guise of sitcom parodies, was a welcome opportunity for Olsen. Not only did it allow the actor to really wrestle with the traumatic backstory that has long defined the character in the MCU, but having the chance to calibrate a performance that functions on so many different levels was a thrilling challenge.

“It was such an amazing work experience,” she says. “Kathryn [Hahn] uses the word ‘profound’—which is so sweet, because it is Marvel, and people, you know, don’t think of those experiences as profound when they watch them. But it really was such a special crew that [director] Matt Shakman and [creator] Jac Schaeffer created. It was a really healthy working environment.”

Related‘WandaVision’ Star Kathryn Hahn’s Secret to Building a Scene-Stealing Performance ‘WandaVision’ Star Kathryn Hahn’s Secret to Building a Scene-Stealing Performance Considering that the miniseries spans several sitcom iterations, various layers of televisual reality, and a number of character reveals that needed to feel truthful and impactful in equal measure, Shakman’s decision to work closely with his actors ahead of shooting was key.

“We truly had a gorgeous amount of time together before we started filming,” Olsen remembers. “Our goal was—which is controversial in TV land—that if you wanted to change [anything], like dialogue in a scene, you had to give those notes a week before we even got there. Because sometimes you get to set, and someone had a brilliant idea while they were sleeping, and you’re like, ‘We don’t have an hour to talk about this. We have seven pages to shoot.’ And so, we were all on the same page with one another, knowing what we were shooting ahead of time.

“Matt just treated us like a troupe of actors who were about to do some regional theater shit,” she adds with a smile.

That spirit of camaraderie was, not coincidentally, at the heart of Olsen’s breakout project, Sean Durkin’s 2011 indie sensation “Martha Marcy May Marlene.” As an introduction to the process of filmmaking to a young stage-trained actor, Durkin’s quietly devastating drama was a dream—and an invaluable learning opportunity.

“It was truly just a bunch of people who loved the script, who just were doing the work. I didn’t understand lenses, so I just did the same thing all the time. I never knew if the camera would be on me or not. There was just so much purity in that experience, and you only have that once.”

The film announced Olsen as a talent to watch: a keen-eyed performer capable of deploying a stilted physicality and clipped delivery, which she used to conjure up a wounded girl learning how to shake off her time spent in a cult in upstate New York. But Olsen admits that it took her a while to figure out how to navigate her career choices afterward. In the years following “Martha,” she felt compelled to try on everything: a horror flick here, a high-profile remake there, a period piece here, an action movie there. It wasn’t until she starred in neo-Western thriller “Wind River” (alongside fellow Marvel regular Jeremy Renner) and the dark comedy “Ingrid Goes West” (opposite a deliciously deranged Aubrey Plaza) that Olsen found her groove.

“It was at that point, when I was five years into working, where I was like, Ah, I know how I want it. I know what I need from these people—from who’s involved, from producers, from directors, from the character, from the script—in order to trust that it’s going to be a fruitful experience.”

As Olsen looks back on her first decade as a working actor, she points out how far removed she is from that young girl who broke out in “Martha Marcy May Marlene.”

“I feel like a totally different person. I don’t know if everyone who’s in their early 30s feels like their early 20s self is a totally different human. But when I think about that version of myself, it feels like a long time ago; there’s a lot learned in a decade.”

Those early years were marked by a self-effacing humility that often led Olsen to defer to others when it came to key decisions about the characters she was playing. But she now feels emboldened to not only stand up for herself and her choices but for others on her sets as well.

“[Facebook Watch series] ‘Sorry for Your Loss’ I got to produce, and I really found my voice in a collaborative leadership way. And with ‘WandaVision,’ Paul [Bettany] and I really took on that feeling, as well—especially since we were introducing new characters to Marvel and wanted [those actors] to feel protected and helped,” she says. “They could ask questions and make sure they felt like they had all the things they needed because sometimes you don’t even know what you need to ask.”

It’s a lesson she learned working with filmmaker Marc Abraham on the Hank Williams biopic “I Saw the Light,” and she’s carried it with her ever since. “I really want it to feel like we’re all in this together, as a team,” Olsen says. “That was part of ‘Sorry for Your Loss’ and it was part of ‘WandaVision,’ and I hope to continue that kind of energy because those have been some of the healthiest work experiences I’ve had.”

If Olsen sounds particularly zealous about the importance of a comfortable, working set, it is because she’s well aware that therein lies an integral part of the work and the process. As an actor, she wants to feel protected and nurtured by those around her, whether she’s reacting to a telling, quiet line of dialogue about grief or donning her iconic Scarlet Witch outfit during a magic-filled mid-air action sequence.

“Sometimes you’re going to be foolish, you know? And [you need to] feel brave to be foolish. Sometimes people feel embarrassed on set and snap. But if you’re in a place where people feel like they’re allowed to be an idiot,” she says, “you’re going to feel better about being an idiot.”

This story originally appeared in the Aug. 19 issue of Backstage Magazine. Subscribe here.

Press/Gallery: How Elizabeth Olsen Brought Marvel From Mainstream to Prestige was originally published on Elizabeth Olsen Source • Your source for everything Elizabeth Olsen

#Elizabeth Olsen #WandaVision #Avengers #Scarlet Witch #Wanda Maximoff #Sorry For Your Loss #Avengers Infinity War #Avengers Age of Ultron #Captain America Civil War #Ingrid Goes West #Godzilla #Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness #Marvel #MCU #Candy Montgomery #Love and Death #Avengers Endgame

[kayecorral]

Freight Car

Chapter One of the Brown Book Series

Rating: Mature

Warnings: Mentions of violence, PTSD (!), swearing

Word Count: 3.4k

Series Summary: Nine years ago, The Winter Soldier murdered your friend in front of you. Nine years later, Bucky Barnes shows up at your door with the hope of making amends.

⭑⭑⭑

⭑⭑

⭑

You wake up on the floor again.

In the crossfade between dreaming to waking, the hardwood is concrete against your cheek. The sweat in your hair is the slick of blood. You fade in and out, and awareness comes back slowly. A siren descends, moving closer and closer, then recedes into the quiet. You don’t know if you imagined it.

You do know that your alarm isn’t blaring. Your ringtone isn’t sounding. The birds chattering and chirping at your window are real. The steady knocking of your heart against your ribs is real. Maybe that’s enough.

You open your eyes. A sliver of light from the parted curtains cuts across the floor. Above it, dust dances in the still air. All is calm. If you had woken up in your bed, this would be a good morning.  

But you didn’t wake up in your bed. So, you peel yourself off the floor and half-walk, half-limp to the bathroom. As you cross the threshold and flick on the light, a face flashes before you. Before your mind can work to discern its features, you slam the door shut and flip the switch. You cry in the dark.

⭑⭑⭑

You call into work again.

You’re tempted to stay where you are—curled in on yourself under the covers—but Dr. Kaplan’s gentle voice prods from inside your skull.  “Trauma changes over time,” it says. “You have to face it as it comes. You’ll feel worse if you put off dealing with it.”

She picks up on the second ring. Judging by the sound of clinking silverware, she’s on her lunch break. You promise to keep this impromptu session short.

“I haven’t had a nightmare like that in a long time. That’s why it hit me so hard, I think.” You begin. Your eyes fill with tears. You don’t know why. The nightmare is so distant now — just bits of feeling. Your brain is scrubbing away the memory like a mounted defense.

You’re quiet for what feels like minutes, and Dr. Kaplan just waits. She doesn’t pose a question or make a suggestion: in other words, she doesn’t offer an out. She never does. At first, her silence and seemingly unending patience unnerved you. You would later understand the value of having the space to organize your thoughts before speaking them.  

“I thought I was doing better,” you eventually say. “But now, it’s like I’m back where I started.”

“You are not back where you started,” she says. “We haven’t talked about your night terrors in months when we used to talk about them every session. That’s incredible progress. You should be proud of how far you’ve come.”

You hold the phone away so she can’t hear the tears in your voice. “But what does it mean? ”

“Well,” she pauses. “Have you been thinking about Jean lately?”

“Kind of,” you start to say, then remember Dr. Kaplan’s rule about specifics. “I’ve probably thought about her… twice in the past week. Marie, she, uh, she sent me a Facebook request.”

“Did you accept it?” She asks, with just a hint of amusement.

“I haven’t. I don’t know if I should.”

“Why not?” Dr. Kaplan asks. She knows the answer, of course. You haven’t spoken to Marie since the funeral nearly a decade ago. You know she resents you. You saw it in the tightness of her smiles and the way her eyes turned to stone as you stood before Jean’s casket. You’re alive and her sister isn’t. You understand that. What you don’t understand is why she would reach out to you after so many years.

“I’m afraid of what she’ll say,” you admit.

“It wasn’t your fault.” Dr. Kaplan says. You shift on the couch. “She knows that. Maybe she’s been thinking about Jean, too.”

“Yeah,” you respond simply. Your head is light from dehydration, and you should probably take a nap at some point.

“I’d recommend you take easy today…”

“But?”

“But next week, I’d like to hear about your Facebook convo.”

You smile. The tears have dried on your face.

⭑⭑⭑

Snippets of dialogue filter through your thoughts. A woman is talking about a missing child, and a detective is asking the “who, what, where”s. It’s an episode you’ve already seen, but it makes for good background noise: the dramatic stings, the fast-talking, the screech of tires as the driver peels off. You don’t know why you gravitate towards crime shows. It might be a bit morbid, but until now, you’ve never thought to mention it to Dr. Kaplan.

You’re almost done with the cake batter. It’s looking a little watery, though. You really should have followed the recipe instead of improvising.

You reach for the flour bag on the counter, and just as you raise it to the mixing bowl, someone knocks at your door. You jolt and the bag slips from your hands. You narrowly dodge as it plummets to the ground. It lands with a  thump and now, your feet and pants and floor are covered in a film of white powder.

“Fuck,” you breathe.

There’s another knock, a bit louder this time.

“Give me — give me just a minute!” You call out, voice frayed.

You step over your mess and towards the door. You notice how slick your hand is on the doorknob, so you wipe your hands on your pants and try again. You forget your ritual of checking and re-checking the peephole. You unlock the door, already anxious at the idea of keeping anyone waiting.

When you finally swing the door open, a tall, dark-haired white guy is staring at the carpeted hallway floor. He’s not looking at you, but you feel exposed in your flimsy tank top and flour-splattered pajama pants.

Meanwhile, his look is carefully nondescript: a leather jacket, a dark shirt, and jeans. His hands are stuffed into his pockets and his shoulders are slightly hunched. He looks like someone who doesn’t  want to be seen, but here he is, standing at your door.

Maybe he’s just a neighbor on a reluctant mission to convince you to turn your volume down. Maybe he’s a dealer at the wrong address. Maybe he —

Your stomach drops. The shadows had been obscuring his face, but now that he’s tilting his chin up to look at you… the broadness of his forehead, the color of his hair, his height, all these things pull together. They pull tighter and tighter around your heart, and you realize that you’ve seen this man before. You’ve seen him a thousand times.

Your hand flies up to your neck. Fear hits like a punch to your gut. He looks normal — so normal that you could convince yourself that it’s not him. It’s not him.

But now, his eyes — a startling shade of blue— meet yours. Cold washes over you as every sensation in your body amplifies. You feel small and weak. Your vision starts trembling at the edges. You can’t move — not even to release your breath.

“I’m not here to hurt you,” he says. His voice sounds so different from the one in your memories. It’s not as coarse and low, it’s gentler and higher-pitched. “I just wanna talk.”  

“Talk.” The word escapes you, but you hadn’t meant to speak. Hearing your own voice makes this real.

He clears his throat. “My name is James Barnes, and I’m no longer The Winter Soldier.”

The Winter Soldier. You suppose it doesn’t matter now what that means. If these are your last moments, you’re not going to spend them deciphering code. Instead, you think of your life and all the things you’ve done and all that you haven’t done. In the span of moments, you try to make peace with your death.

“If you’re going to kill me...” you can’t keep your voice from shaking, “do it.”

His eyes widen. “I’m not here to kill you. I’m — ”

“Hydra wants to know what I know. Is that it?” Your mind reels with the new theory.

His eyebrows tick up. “Hydra doesn’t exist anymore,” he says with a measured tone. “Not really.”

You don’t know how to respond to that divulgence. You don’t even know if you can trust it.

“I’m here because you,” he adds your name — your real name, “are part of my efforts to make amends.”

Your thoughts catch on how he knows your name. It’s a small thing, really. He knows where you live, after all. 

“I know you’re confused, and I know you have questions.” He reaches up to scratch his neck. “And if you’re not, ah...” he glances from your face to your body, as if he were just now noticing your state of dress, “comfortable talking here, we can talk somewhere public. I guess what I’m asking is: can I buy you lunch or, uh, dinner? ”

You consider, seriously, that this man may be clinically insane. You have no other rational explanation for his showing up at your door on a Thursday afternoon, let alone his proposition. But you allow yourself to imagine it: you and him, sitting across a table with Jean’s ghost between and behind you. Your stomach turns at the thought.

“You murdered my friend,” you say slowly, “right in front of me.”

He nods. A pained look crosses his face, and that expression spurs your anger. It hadn’t occurred to you earlier that you should call the police. This man is a murderer, and he’s walking free. 

“You shouldn’t even be here — you should be in a prison somewhere!” You choke out as your throat tightens with impending tears.

“I didn’t have a choice. I didn’t want to kill her!” He says forcefully. “I didn’t want to kill anyone. I — ”

“But you did kill her!” You can’t hold them back anymore, and now, you’re crying in front of the man who killed Jean. Humiliation heats your cheeks.

“You did kill her,” you repeat quietly. You turn your watery gaze away.

“You’re right, I’m sorry.” He says.

In your peripheral, you watch him step closer. When you flinch, he bobs back.

You should step back, shut the door, and call the police. Not that a slab of wood could stop him if he wanted to get to you. You’ve seen his silver arm. You’ve felt the grip of its fingers at the base of your neck. But, maybe you could manage a dial ‘9-1-1’ before —

“Look, I’m not asking for your forgiveness,” he interrupts your line of thought and, against your will, you look at him again, “I know I don’t deserve it, but I do want to offer you answers. Maybe it can…” He waves his hand as he searches for what he thinks are the right words. “Maybe it can give you some closure. And then, you’ll never see me again.”

You consider the furrow of his eyebrows. Over the years, you’ve tried reconstructing his face from its missing half. Now that you have the full picture, it makes perfect sense: the upper edges of the mask aligned with the cut of his cheekbones, the thin bridge really did conform to his nose, and the wideness of his jaw was merely accentuated. But his features are such a striking contrast to the severity of that mask and that metal arm. He looks so much leaner than you remember. He looks like a man, not a machine.

“Stay here,” you say. “I’ll be out in a minute.”

He nods and his brow softens. You shut the door and press your forehead against it.

After a few beats, you rest your hand on the base of your neck and suck in a few deep breaths. It’s a calming technique Dr. Kaplan taught you. But without meaning to, you flex your fingers. Just as your heart was beginning to slow, you’re pulled into the memory of him raising you by the throat. You gasp for air.

That man is behind this door. That man is behind this door.

You race around the couch to snatch your phone off the coffee table. You unlock it with shaking hands and now, your thumb hovers over the number pad.

“Fuck,” you whisper as you press ‘9’.

It’s true. You do want answers. You want to know why he killed her. You want to know about Hydra and his role in it. You want to know why he left you alive.

So you’ll get your answers,  then call the cops.

You pull on some real pants and cover up with a sweatshirt. But at the door, you hesitate to step out again. If you’ve imagined that whole encounter, if it was some vivid manifestation of your survivor’s guilt, then you wouldn’t have to go.

You press your ear against the door, and, as if your doubts had broadcasted through the wood, he coughs. You sigh and grab the doorknob. Your hand isn’t sweaty this time.

At the sound of the hinges creaking, his gaze snaps to you. You meet his eyes without meaning to. There’s no recognizable emotion in them. The creases in his forehead and the furrow in his brow are gone. Now, his face gives nothing away.

“There’s a place about two blocks from here,” you say simply.

He nods and looks to you as if for direction. If he were anyone else, you would start heading for the elevator without further ado, but the thought of Jean’s killer trailing behind you makes your stomach flip.

“I’d prefer you walk ahead,” you utter. His eyebrows raise slightly, but he gives no other visible reaction.

“Alright,” he says.

He moves down the hallway, and you follow. Your eyes stay trained on his back. Aside from your occasional direction, it’s a silent walk.

⭑⭑⭑

Sully’s is a dive, but it’s always busy, and this evening is no exception. The people who frequent this place are the kind of people who get loud after a few drinks and don’t give two shits about you unless you’re bleeding out on the floor. That’s perfect. God forbid anyone overhears your questions about murder and secret organizations.

“You want anything?” He asks after you choose a corner booth and tuck in. His casual tone bothers you, but he keeps his distance, at the very least.

“No,” you deadpan.

He nods and starts for the bar. A few people graze him as he passes, and it’s so crowded that you’ve already lost sight of him.

You place your phone face-up on the sticky, varnished wood table. Absentmindedly, you nudge the pedal base with your foot. You try to hone in on any particular voice, but all you hear is a buzz of conversation. It’s a comfort. It means that you’re not alone and he can’t hurt you here.

“I know you didn’t ask for anything, but…” Fuck. Your knee knocks on the bottom of the table. His voice is so sudden at your side.

He places a water glass in front of you, and you stop yourself before you can say “thanks”. He drops into the chair in front of you, a beer bottle tucked between his gloved palms. Gloves. He’s wearing gloves. You hadn’t noticed until now.

There’s an awkward pause. He watches you intently. Your stomach is churning, but you steadily meet his gaze. You have so many questions. Some of the things he’s said don’t make sense. One thing, in particular, though, is nagging at you.

“Back there, you said you didn’t have a choice,” you say dubiously, “what did you mean?”

He takes a drag of beer and sets the bottle down carefully before he speaks. “They brainwashed me.” He replies bluntly. “Hydra, I mean.”

Brainwashing? It’s not entirely outside the realm of possibility. Aliens exist, as do superheroes and Norse gods and Mad Titans. What was once science-fiction is now very real and devastating.

He gives you a few beats to process, then continues. “For seventy years, I operated as The Winter Soldier.”

“Wait. Seventy years?”

“I just turned 106 in March,” he says with a sardonic smile.

“How is that possible?”

“I was on ice.” He sighs. “They only took me out when they needed me.”

“And Hydra… what happened to them?”

His jaw tightens. It’s the most reaction you’ve gotten so far. “They used to have this saying: cut off one head, two more take its place… Maybe they’ll come back, but right now, they’re gone.”

“So they aren’t after me,” you say softly, more to yourself than him.

“If Hydra wanted you out of the way, they wouldn’t’ve sent me.” He grimaces, even as his voice mocks a shrug.

You get it now: you’re not a threat, and you never were.

“But I was a loose end, wasn’t I? Why didn’t you kill me?”

He shakes his head and says, “I don’t know.”

He doesn’t elaborate further. Instead, he finishes off his bottle and shifts his gaze to the table.

After a minute or two, you consider moving on, but something about his expression, both vacant and pensive, implores you to wait. In the interim, you glance from the people knocking shoulders at the bar to the couple in front of you.

“It was that look on your face,” he says, and you find his gaze is fixed on you again. “It was rage. And grief. And that-that grief almost overtook everything else, but I saw it.” He leans towards you, his eyebrows knitting close. “That part of you that… that part of you that wanted me to kill you, too.”

He glances at his hand on the table and releases a shaky breath. “I understood that,” he says. “I know what it’s like.”

Like a clenched fist releasing, the tightness in your chest eases. You understand something else, now, too. This is meant to be an exchange. He wants answers as much as you do, no matter how much pain they carry.

“Do you wanna know what I saw? On your face?” You ask after a few beats. He hesitantly nods. “Nothing. There was nothing,” you say. “You didn’t even look human.  It was like you were an animal. And you were looking at me like I was prey.”

You look away. The intensity of his eyes threatens to pull you into that memory. “I’ve never been more terrified in my entire life.”

“I’m so sorry,” you hear him say.

“I’m not the one you should be apologizing to,” you say quietly, chancing a glance up.

His face twists into something like shame. If he were a different person, you might try to comfort him. But he’s not a different person. He’s a stranger wearing the face that’s haunted you for nine years.

“So why now?”

“Well, I was…” He mimics a snap with his right hand. “And after that, I… started going to therapy.”

He pulls a small, brown book from his jacket pocket. “My, uh, shrink told me to make a list of people I’ve wronged,” he says as he flips it open to a page in the middle and places it in front of you. “You’re one of the last.”

You find your name third-to-bottom. The ones above are crossed through. He glances from your face to your fingers as they trace his careful scrawl.

“You don’t let people look at this, do you?” You ask.

He half-smiles and shakes his head.

“So why are you letting me?”

“I, uh,” he flexes his hand. “I don’t know. I just… thought I owed it to you.”

You briefly consider asking about the other names, but he doesn’t owe you those. He owes you answers about the life he can’t return. Just as another question bubbles up your throat, a ringtone sounds. You glance at your phone’s black screen, then back to his furrowed brow. He reaches into his back pocket to fish out a flip phone. A  flip phone.  You haven’t seen one in years.

“Shit,” he mutters under his breath. He looks up from the screen.

“Sorry, I have to take this,” he says as he squeezes out of the booth. He disappears as quickly as before.

⭑⭑⭑

You finally take a sip of water. The sweat of the glass bleeds onto your fingertips, so you wipe your hand off on your pant leg before touching your phone. 6:15, it says, which means you've been sitting on this hard, plastic seat for over forty minutes. He's been gone for about ten of them.

Before you can seriously consider just leaving, his form comes into view.

"I've gotta go, but..." He says as he pulls the brown book out of his pocket again. When he opens it, he tears a small piece from the page corner, then scribbles something with a pen.

He places the piece of paper next to the perspiration ring on the table. Stealing one last glance at you, he turns and leaves for the third and final time.

On it is a phone number and a name:

Bucky

#tfatws spoilers #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes #the falcon and the winter soldier #the birdman and the winter warrior #brown book

[flooffybits]

Stay A While

Idol: Ha Sooyoung, Jung Jinsoul (Loona)

Anon: Yay. Okay so how about one with LOONA’s 13th member? Yvesoul are in a happy relationship and the 13th member who is especially close with them has feelings for both. She doesn’t say anything though, worried about making things awkward or interfering in what is already a happy relationship. So instead, she starts distancing herself to hide the symptoms. She doesn’t want to get surgery cause she can’t imagine not feeling the way she does but she also refuses to tell anyone so she starts getting worse and worse. Heejin, Lip and Chuu find out at some point by accident. The 13th member is really stubborn. Lots of angst and hurt feelings and protective members please. And a happy ending please (I was going for only angst but I’m too weak 😂) thank you so much in advance.

A/n: well since you asked so nicely 😂  i really tried to think of a way with making this interesting so i hope you enjoy! it’s really hard making this a happy ending but please ignore the crappy ending if you wish

Warning: blood, near death experience (sorta), heavy angst

☕buy me a coffee☕

You were known to be Loona's biggest fan, aside from Jiwoo, and your members and fans knew just how much you'd practically do anything for all of them.

It was what made you so likeable and the fans loved it when you would also try to hype them up whenever you get the chance to see them, making them feel as though you were the one who came to see them instead. 

Your selflessness was one of your greatest strengths, but as time passed, it began to serve as your greatest weakness.

A little after Sooyoung and Jinsoul had officially informed all of you about how they were dating, you were beginning to feel a bit off whenever you saw them. It made your chest tighten and your throat itches as though something was stuck in there.

But you were extremely supportive of the pair even before they had gotten together. While they tended to act like cat and mouse, you were always there to make sure neither girls went too far or simply became the subject of their teasing when they wanted, claiming that you were the maknae of your unofficial subunit.

It took you time to understand what was happening to you. While you didn't think about it at first, you were actually very fond of the pair, enjoying their company and the way they took care of you. While they did love to annoy you, Sooyoung and Jinsoul did their best to take care of you and look after you whether or not you were aware of it.

When the first petal came falling on the palm of your hand right as the pair informed you how they were going out for a date, you brushed it off, confused as to where the yellow petal had come from. But a couple hours after that, you find yourself lightheaded and weak as your coughing begins to worsen.

Haseul was quick in giving you some cough medicines and ordered that you get some rest even as you assured her you would be fine.

"Stop being so stubborn and get some rest. I bet you were staying up with Jinsoul and Yves again." The mention of the pair caused another itching sensation in your throat but you had done your best to suppress it, at least until your leader had left you alone in your room.

As soon as she was gone, you quickly covered your mouth as you entered another coughing fit, one that made you feel even worse than you already were.

But as soon as you pulled your hand away, you stared, horrified at the blood stained petals that stared back up at you.

When everyone had gotten home, you made sure to stay in bed, pretending to sleep whenever someone came into the room, but no matter how much you tried, there was no ridding you of the thoughts that swam through your mind, all centered around the petals you had flushed down the toilet and the blood you had to wash from your hands.

.. 

You knew what the disease was, what caused it. But all this time, you had merely thought it was a myth, nothing but a made up fable.

And yet you were a living proof that the disease did exist and that it was slowly eating away inside of you.

You didn't dare tell any of your members about it because you know that they would fall into panic. And with Haseul having only just recovered, you didn't want to make her go through another difficult event, especially not one that involved you possibly dying if you didn't find a way to rid yourself of disease.

"Hey, is everything alright?" Sooyoung came up to you once when you were eating lunch, alone, and you honestly weren't too sure if you were in the mood to talk. "You've been awfully quiet lately and we were wondering if there was something bothering you." She explains while you poked your food and avoided her inquisitive gaze. "Yeah, just a little tired."

That had been your answer most days. And while that was true, you couldn't exactly tell her the whole truth.

Her expression becomes pensive without you looking because there was clearly much more that you weren't saying. "Y/n, if you need help, we're always going to be here for you. Jinsoul and I might be dating and everything, but that doesn't mean we don't have time for you anymore." She says while reaching out to touch your arm and you do your best not to recoil and tear your arm away.

Instead, you slap on a smile, one that doesn't quite reach your eyes, before nodding your head. "I know, Yves unnie. Don't worry."

Sooyoung stares at you for a moment, clearly saddened by your reply because, one, she knows that you were lying. It was clear as day. And, two, you had stopped calling her Yves two months after you had debuted and got to know all of them, unless it was during interviews and filming.

She mutters a quiet okay before watching you exit the dining area and head to the bathroom.

While Sooyoung left to find her girlfriend, you grip at the sink as your body shakes violently, yellow and red quickly filling your vision when more of the flowers come falling from your mouth and you desperately try to wash them away, getting rid of any and all traces of your suffering, before you sit on the cold floor, back against the door as you bury your face into your hands to muffle the sobs that replaced the petals that left your lips.

..

It had been nearly two months since you found out you were suffering from the disease. Nothing you tried was able to ease the pain nor was anything enough to help you get rid of it. Each day was only making you feel worse and weak that it was a surprise how none of your members had caught on yet.

Maybe it was because you kept your time away from your members, reading and searching about any known cures until you decided that asking a professional would be where you would get the best possible answer.

They were surprised when you revealed to them the truth. While they knew that it was a very rare disease, finding out that you, a young idol, was suffering from it had them all trying their best to help you in whatever help they could offer until the doctor you had consulted explained to you the complications of getting the surgery.

The surgery, you had no problem doing. You were more than willing to go through with it, but when he told you that you would grow numb toward the person, or in your case people, along with the potential of forgetting those who were the root of your unrequited love, the idea was quickly thrown out the window.

Even when you tried to deny the fact that maybe you were feeling much more love for Sooyoung and Jinsoul than you were supposed to, you couldn’t push through with it. To be numb and risk forgetting two of the most precious people to you? That would not only be too much for you, but it would be heartbreaking for everyone else around you. And in the event you do forget your members, that would cause much confusion to everyone else.

You quickly declined after that and simply settled with painkillers just so it wouldn’t affect you as badly whenever you had a coughing fit.

You avoided the couple as much as possible because, to you, the less you saw them, the slower the petals would fill your lungs. It also meant avoiding the rest of your members as much as possible because you weren’t so keen with anyone finding out.

But once during practice, the sound of Jiwoo’s voice calling your attention had nearly caused your heart to drop in your stomach. “Yah! I told you to stop picking at your lips!” You flinched at both her words and the volume of her voice before a hand pulled yours away from your lips when you quickly went to wipe away the bit of blood after another couple of petals decided to present themselves to you.

Whenever you were around others, you always opted to dress in either black or darker clothing in the event the blood tried to stain them, making it easier to avoid suspicions.

You blink owlishly toward the older girl and rubbed the back of your head. “Sorry, force of habit.” You apologize before Jungeun was grabbing a towel to wipe it away. Heejin was already shaking her head as the ‘99 liners started to lecture you about the stupid habit you’ve actually gotten rid of. “What’s wrong though? I know that you only do that when you’re anxious about something.” She asks while peering at your face, only to see that there was no wound present on your lip after Jungeun pulled her hand away.

She had to take a closer look and you felt yourself begin to feel nervous with how close she was being, your heart thudding against your ribs while Jungeun made a sound of surprise by the younger girl’s sudden bold move.

“Yah! What are you doing?” The blonde questioned as she shook your roommate’s arm, but Heejin was adamant to find out what was going on as she took your arm gently, concern now all over her face as she looked at you properly, ignoring the weird stares sent her way.

But her attention is solely on you when she doesn’t budge. “What’s going on?”

You aren’t sure what to tell her. Aside from being your roommate, Heejin was the next person you were closest to aside from Sooyoung and Jinsoul. When you weren’t with the pair, you were with her and Hyunjin or Jiwoo, thus the reason fans shipped you so much.

Majority of the time you don’t spend with either Jinsoul and Sooyoung, you spend with Heejin and you basically tell her everything. The first time you met, Heejin decided to take care of you the best she could, and the longer time she spent with you, the more that feeling grew because she saw you so much like a sister.

"Are you really okay? What's going on?" She asked quietly and you don't know what to tell her. Even if you did lie, it was easy for them to detect it and they would pry the answer out of you no matter what. You try looking around in hopes of distracting them, but when you find none, you know that there was no escape.

However when you notice Jinsoul about to come over, you squeezed Heejin's wrist before shaking your head. "Not here, please." You plead, and the three girls look even more worried with your panicked state, seeing that Jinsoul was getting closer, her eyes narrowed on you and Heejin.

Reluctantly, the latter accepted your request and Jiwoo pouted at you. "Y/n, you better be okay." She tells you. "I don't want anything happening to you." She adds and you smile weakly, because you know this would absolutely break her heart once she finds out.

"I'll explain everything, later." Unless they forget, you know that it was inevitable at this point.

When Jinsoul is close enough, she takes a quick look at you and you offer her a small smile. "Hey, is everything alright?" She asks curiously and Heejin wraps her arms around you with a smile. "Yep! We were just playing around like usual." She replies when she sees the slight panic in your eyes. Knowing your relationship with both Jinsoul and Sooyoung, the potential of you being in trouble was something Heejin knew you wanted to avoid bringing up with the two older girls.

But with the protectiveness Heejin was showing had only agitated the older girl as she stared at you and Jungeun cut her off quickly by stepping in front of you. “Unnie, come on. Let’s get back to practice. I think our break is almost done.” With one more look at you, you sent the blonde a thankful smile as she pulled Jinsoul away.

Jiwoo stared at you for a while before pulling you into a hug. “I’ll wait until you’re ready to talk about it.” She mumbled against your shoulder and you gave her a smile as well when she pulled away and squeezed her hands.

With Heejin left with you, her concern was still visible in her eyes, but she decided it was best to let you explain when you’ve collected yourself and that you were in a less crowded space.

..

Haseul quietly stared at you with her brows pinched together in worry. When she didn’t see you with the rest of the group, she quickly went to wake you up, thinking that you may have overslept, only to find you curled up in bed, shivering with a high fever.

“I think we should call our manager.” Kahei’s quiet voice broke through the silence and the leader nodded absentmindedly as she reached to fix the blanket around you. “She hasn’t been feeling well this whole week. Has she been skipping meals or anything?” But the older girl merely shook her head. “I don’t think so. She’s been spending a lot of time with Heejin, but I doubt she has.”

There’s a light knock on the door and Yeojin soon comes in with a basin filled with water and a towel. Chaewon and Yerim were quick to follow before they settled on the other beds inside the room.

“Thank you.” Haseul took the basin and placed it on your nightstand, wringing the towel before she was wiping your face and forehead, dipping it back in the water and repeating her earlier action before placing it on your forehead to hopefully bring down your fever.

“What about our schedules later?” Chaewon asked softly and Haseul let out a sigh. “I don’t think unnie is capable of even getting out of bed. She’s too sick.” Yerim whispered as she watched you from the side and Yeojin nodded her head. “But I don’t want to leave unnie alone, either.” The maknae voiced out before Kahei gently patted her head. “We’ll think of something, don’t worry. We’ll even get her some medicine and food on the way back.”

A little before your schedule, Haseul has already contacted your manager to inform them about your condition and they agreed to let you rest after being informed of how badly you were feeling. And while everyone was busy getting ready, Heejin sat next to your bed, taking the seat Haseul occupied that morning and stared sadly at you.

“We need to tell them, Y/n. This isn’t going to do anything but make you worse.” She whimpered while gripping your hand and you crack a small smile. “You know I can’t do that. And even if I did, it’s not going to change anything. I’d rather go through with this without making anyone feel bad about me dying.”

But your words had managed to force tears in her eyes as she shook her head. “Don’t say that. Please.” She pleaded while trying to keep her voice from cracking and you squeeze her hand the best you could. “I can’t lie about this, Heejin. You, Chuu unnie, and Lip unnie know that I refuse to get the surgery and that it’s probably too late already.”

“But what if there’s another way. There has to be another way.” She wasn’t sure who she was trying to convince; you or herself. Heejin has known you since for a good two years, but those two years has already cemented you into her life and she has never imagined losing you so soon, especially not like this.

You try to say something, but once again, a cough interrupts and Heejin tightens her hold on your hand when the other is colored with the blood stained petals of yellow Carnations. She tries not to look at them, bringing the trash bin closer after handing you some tissues to conceal the petals, and then wiping her cheeks from the tears that had trailed down her skin.

She grabs another towel to wipe your hand before she sets it down next to the basin with a heavy sigh.

The door quietly opens behind her and Jinsoul peers inside, surprised when she sees the girl before she offers a small smile while stepping in, her girlfriend following close behind with a frown on her face. “How is she feeling?”

Heejin looked over her shoulder and she tried to keep her composure when she spoke. “She’s okay, just really tired.” She replies when she turns back to you, watching the gentle rise and fall of your chest after finally calming down from your wheezing.

Sooyoung stays standing while Jinsoul sits down to look at you closer. There’s a pang in their chest when they see you looking so small and fragile. Your face lacked color - life. It was like staring at a corpse, minus the breathing and it was terrifying to imagine, yet they didn’t know better.

Not the way Heejin did.

And seeing the way the younger girl held your hand and looked incredibly distraught by your condition had caused the pair to be even more suspicious than they already were.

“She’s going to be alright, Heejin.” Jinsoul says quietly, the smile still present on her features while Sooyoung purses her lips and Heejin bites her tongue to stop herself from saying anything.

No matter how badly she wanted to tell them, the faint squeeze to her hand reminded her that this was your decision to make. She was merely there to be your support system when no one else could.

But to see both Sooyoung and Jinsoul be so clueless yet speak so optimistically about you getting better made her nearly forget that she had promised not to tell anyone about your illness.

So instead of saying anything, Heejiin merely kept her mouth shut while she waited for the rest to call the three of them or for the two to leave her alone with you. But it seemed like they had other plans.

“Is there… anything going on between you and Y/n?” Sooyoung suddenly questioned after a few seconds of silence and the girl seemed a bit taken aback by her question before Jinsoul quickly intervened. “We’re not trying to be nosy! We just noticed how you’ve been so close recently and wondered if, maybe, you were…”

Heejin seemed dumbfounded by the assumption. In other circumstances, she would have laughed because, while she did love you to bits, that love was merely platonic.

“No. Y/n and I are pretty much like sisters so I doubt we’d ever be anything more.” She answered and the couple looked a bit tense now that she properly assessed them. “I know that a lot of people think and assume that we might be together, but that’s really not the case.” She explains with a shake of her head before she noticed you shifting in bed.

The movement catches the couple’s attention and they immediately look at you when your quiet voice cuts in on their conversation. “Heejin, I’m cold.” Sooyoung’s frown deepens before she was already heading to your closet and grabbing the thickest jacket that you had, which was something Jinsoul had given you on your first birthday with all of them.

“Do you want something to drink?” Heejin asked while brushing your hair from your face, replacing the towel on your forehead with a new one and Jinsoul shifted closer to gently touch your arm. “It’s okay, you’re going to be okay.” She murmured softly when she saw the grimace on your face and Sooyoung came back to gently put your jacket around you without moving you too much.

Heejin makes sure the heater is working, and when it’s time for them to go, she’s hesitant to leave your side in fear of losing you when she’s away.

“Come on, we have to go.” Hyunjin called after her, but when she saw the way her friend couldn’t seem to move from her place, she could feel just what the other did. So, she quietly walked over and rubbed her arm in assurance. “Don’t worry, when we come back, we don’t have to leave her alone again.”

The promise, though having good intentions, was obviously empty for Heejin. In the event that your illness took you away, there was no guarantee that you would be staying for long.

Jungeun and Jiwoo came in with frowns on their faces as they saw you, but they quickly masked their worries upon seeing Hyunjin in the room with you. “Hey, we have to get going or else we’ll be late.” Jungeun informs them and Hyunjin nodded before she gave her friend another pat on the shoulder. “Let’s go.”

“We’ll be back before you know it.”

..

Jiwoo glanced beside her and Jungeun kept her phone in her hand as Heejin anxiously stared out the window. They were finally heading home after five hours and the three were quietly hoping to arrive back to the dorm sooner.

And amidst the chattering of everyone around them, the three have been oddly quiet, talking between themselves. “You should really stop worrying, Y/n unnie will be fine.” Hyejoo spoke up with an encouraging smile. “It’s just a fever, she’s stronger than that.”

It was no secret that the young girl looked up to you so much. She’d been intrigued by you since the first time they met you in Canada, and her fascination only grew the longer you spent together. Hyejoo always found herself learning things from you and she appreciated it every time. Whatever secret or worry she had, you were always one of the people she would first approach.

“Olivia is right. I’m sure she’s feeling much better by the time we get home. We even have her favorite soup and medicines to help her feel better just in case.” Yerim stated happily while Heejin pursed her lips.

Jiwoo squeezed Heejin’s hand and nodded her head, making the younger girl slowly lean back and sigh, forcing her worries down as she shut her eyes and prayed that you were alright.

“Heejin looks really worried about Y/n.” Sooyoung muttered from her place and Jinsoul shook her head. “Y/n doesn’t usually get sick, so I can understand.” But her girlfriend merely huffed and crossed her arms. “I know that, but don’t you think that maybe there’s more to it? We don’t even worry as much as she does.” Jinsoul frowned at Sooyoung and took her hand. “Whatever is going on between Heejin and Y/n is none of our business. If they aren’t ready to tell us, then let them. We didn’t tell Y/n as soon as we started dating, either.”

Grunting, Sooyoung accepted her defeat because what Jinsoul said was true. It wouldn’t be fair if she demanded answers on whether or not you and Heejin were dating when they kept their own relationship a secret, but she just didn’t like the feeling that crept up in her chest when she sees or even thinks of you together.

By the time they all arrived at the dorm, the three were the first ones out, forgetting the food and medicine they bought for you in their haste at getting to you as fast as they could. The rest of the members looked worried and followed after them.

Heejin quietly opened the door to your shared room, peeking inside to see if you were awake, but as soon as her eyes landed on your figure when she flicked the lights on, her heart dropped before she was running inside. “Y/n!”

Jungeun ran to your other side when Heejin tried to help you up from the floor and they gasped upon seeing the various bloodstained petals on the floor and the blood on your own hands. “Stop manager oppa! Tell him we need to go to the hospital!”

Sooyoung stopped dead in her tracks when she saw what was happening. She felt her blood running cold and she wouldn't have been able to move if Jiwoo hadn't ran past her, bumping into her by accident in her haste to call your manager and stop him from leaving.

Jinsoul pushed past everyone and ran to you, taking your face into her hands and shaking her own head as tears welled in her eyes as yours refused to open. "Y/n! Wake up, come on this isn't funny!"

She held a hand close to your mouth and nose before she pressed her head to your chest just to hear your heartbeat.

"Unnie, you have to move." Yerim said urgently while tugging at her friend's arm when your manager came running into the dorm. Haseul was doing her best to keep calm as she gripped Yeojin's hand in her own when they watched your manager pick you up from the floor.

He looked at all of them. "I'm not going to bother asking you if you'll be coming along, I just need you all to follow my instructions until we get help." They all nodded immediately and followed the man back down and to the van with Heejin insisting to hold you as your manager drove.

The poor girl was silently crying as she held your fragile form as close to her as humanly possible, Hyejoo holding your hand when she sat beside Heejin, willing back tears as the first girl wiped the blood from your mouth. 

The ride to the hospital was the longest and tense one they've all ever experienced, but as soon as they arrived, your manager quickly parked the van and went back to retrieve you from the girls before running inside with all twelve girls running after him.

"Y/n L/n." The man said quickly and the receptionist seemed surprised as she typed in your name, only to quickly rise to her feet, calling for the same doctor you had consulted with before nurses soon came over to get you and relieve your manager.

Seeing how quickly people were reacting with your appearance, all of your members looked on with confusion except for the three girls aware of your actual condition.

"What's going on?" Chaewon was the first to ask and all eyes turned to their manager, who looked just as troubled as Heejin, Jiwoo, and Jungeun. "What's happening to Y/n? What was that?" Sooyoung demanded, her voice growing more and more adamant as Jinsoul held her back.

"You know something and you aren't telling us. Y/n said it was just a fever." Haseul tried to keep her voice steady. "A fever doesn't make you cough out blood." The maknae said shakily, terrified of what she had seen.

All four of them exchanged glances before Jungeun let out a sigh. "Y/n is sick, but it isn't a fever or a flu." She crossed her arms to keep her hands from shaking. "She's suffering from Hanahaki. It's a rare disease that makes you cough up petals because of an unrequited love."

"Unrequited love?" Jinsoul muttered, her brows pinching together before she looked to Heejin. "Aren't you together? This isn't making any sense."

"Y/n isn't in love with Heejin!" Jiwoo cut in while hugging the said girl. "But we can't tell you who she's in love with either because she made us promise not to." She added with a grimace. "Y/n is dying in there! Whoever this person is needs to know and do something!" Sooyoung retorted and Heejin snapped to look at her. 

"It doesn't matter if the person she's in love with knows! They're happy and in a relationship. Y/n never wanted to ruin what they had so she kept her feelings under wraps no matter how much it was killing her! She didn't want to get the surgery because she didn't want to forget either of you!"

Jiwoo quickly took the younger girl by the shoulders when she had accidentally slipped up due to her emotions, but there was no stopping now as Sooyoung and Jinsoul went quiet after the sudden outburst.

“Forget us?” Jinsoul slowly released her girlfriend as she took a step forward and Hyunjin went to her best friend’s side to calm her down while Jungeun and Jiwoo decided to clear the situation up the best they could with their manager’s help. “We discovered Y/n’s condition a while back. And while it was the wise decision to pull through with the surgery, she declined for various reasons, the main one being that there was a risk of forgetting the person she has such strong feelings for.”

“She refused to do it, and it seemed like that there was no convincing her otherwise. It would also cause some trouble if she ever does forget both of you because that would be a major shift in your relationship and it won’t take long before people find out.”

“But what’s going to happen to unnie now? Are they going to operate on her?” Hyejoo questioned while the man shook his head. “I’m not too sure. We have to wait for her doctor to come back.”

The male paused, looking grim as he observed each girl, hesitating before finally breathing out. “In the event that this is the worst case scenario, I need all of you to be ready.”

They hated that he had opened up the idea of possibly losing you. While they all knew what this disease would entail, they just couldn’t accept the fact that they could permanently be losing you.

Led outside your room, the girls each waited anxiously for your doctor to come back and tell them what was the condition you were in. The overwhelming fear and anxiety bubbled in all of them and Haseul bit her lip as she did her best to keep a calm face whilst Kahei held her hand, running her thumb across her knuckles.

What seemed like years was only an hour and a half before the door slowly opened and your doctor came with a grim expression across his face. "How is she?" Your manager questioned and the man shook his head while glancing over his shoulder. "She's stable for now. It looks like she was choking on her own blood along with the fully bloomed flowers." He winced before letting a regretful sigh pass his lips.

"I highly advise that she get the surgery as soon as possible because at the rate we're going, there won't be much time left for Y/n." He informed them and Heejin slowly shook her head. "We can't… she doesn't want that."

No matter how much Heejin wanted you to get it, your wish was above her own in wanting to save you. And if she ever allowed it to happen without your consent, it would be in her conscience forever and she wouldn't be able to properly look at you, knowing that she had gone against your wishes.

"But what are we going to do?" Hyunjin questioned seriously. "Y/n is dying. If we don't go through with it-" 

"We know that, but this is Y/n's decision." Jiwoo cut in, a serious look on her usually cheerful face. "I want to help her. We all do. But Y/n made her decision clear ever since she found out. She doesn't want to be numb or to forget about Yves unnie and Jinsoul unnie and we can only respect that decision."

"Chuu is right. We tried to talk her out of it, but Y/n said she would rather die than forget the people she cares about. It isn't fair to you, but it isn't fair to her, either. She knows the risks and she knows the consequences but she chose to take her feelings to the grave rather than burden Jinsoul unnie and Sooyoung unnie with what she felt for them." Jungeun sighed while anxiously running her fingers through her hair.

"... Can we see her?"

The question was from Sooyoung as she stood stiffly next to her girlfriend, eyes trained to the door that separated you and them whilst your doctor nodded his head. "I recommend going in groups, just so she isn't disturbed or stressed out." He advised before excusing himself and giving the girls the time that they needed.

They didn’t need to discuss who would go first because the couple were already in front of your door as soon as they could and Jinsoul sucked in a deep breath before she slowly pushed it open and stepped inside.

Once there, they immediately spot your body laying on the hospital bed with various wires attached to your fragile form that it makes their own hearts ache at the sight.

Sooyoung quickly came to your side and instinctively reached to brush your hair, only to stop when she hears Heejin’s voice echoing in her head. Jinsoul looked worried before she placed her own over her girlfriend’s and gave it a squeeze. “We’ll be okay.” She whispered before pressing a kiss to her temple and then turning back to you.

Your face was peaceful, minus the lack of color and life in it. It was as though this was the first proper sleep you’ve had in how long and it pained them to know that you were enduring all of this for their sake.

“You’re such an idiot, I swear.” Sooyoung finally muttered as she let her hands fall to the sheets. “Stupid, stupid, stupid. Why couldn’t you have told us?” She tried to hold back a sob, but when you didn’t respond to her with your usual banter, it was getting harder for her to keep her composure. “You were pulling away from us because you didn’t want us to worry, now look at us.” Jinsoul sniffled as she wiped her cheeks.

“We could have avoided all of this.” She whimpered quietly while reaching for your hand, your usually warm skin now cold to the touch as she laced her fingers with yours. “Please, we’ll make it better. We’ll take the pain away, just please… please stay with us.”

“Don’t go, Y/n. We need you.” Sooyoung begged as she buried her face to your neck, clutching at the front of your hospital gown while Jinsoul placed her other hand on her back.

The clock was ticking and they knew that the other girls were wanting to see you as desperately as they did, Heejin most especially. So, forcing themselves to part from you, they held each other tight as they headed for the exit.

“... unnie.”

The pair stopped in their tracks as the weak rasp of your voice called out. Turning back, they saw that your eyes were still closed, but the small movement from your hands was all it took for them to know you were awake.

Running to your side, Jinsoul took your outstretched hand and pressed her face against your palm as her watery eyes watched you. “You’re okay.” Sooyoung breathed out as she stood behind her girlfriend.

You struggle to open your eyes, but as soon as you do, you immediately see them watching you with worry swimming in their own tear filled gazes. “Why are you-” You’re cut off by a cough and Jinsoul squeezes your hand when a bit of blood dribbles down your chin before Sooyoung wiped it away.

”Why are you crying?” You forced out, a frown on your features. But the question throws them off and Jinsoul can’t help but cry more. “What do you mean why are we crying? We found you nearly dead in the dorm, do you expect us to be fine?” Sooyoung snapped at you and you blink slowly while trying to properly decipher her words.

Their voices sounded so faint yet they were right there. Your vision was blurry and you had a great struggle with understanding everything they were saying. The only thing you could tell was they were crying, and you didn’t want that.

“I’m scared.” The words were hushed as they fell from your lips and Sooyoung squeezed her eyes tight just so she wouldn’t cry anymore than she already has. “D-Don’t be scared. You’re going to be fine. We’re right here.”

“We love you so much and it hurts that you’re going through this.” Jinsoul muttered against your palm, pressing a light kiss against it. “You should have told us, but we should have told you, too. We were just so scared of how you would think of us and-”

“Unnie…” Your breathing was growing weaker from all the flowers that have bloomed in your lungs. “It’s okay.”

It’s not your fault.

You don’t have to say it.

It isn’t your responsibility.

“Y/n, we love you, okay? We love you, too, just as much as you love us.” Sooyoung told you, desperate to make you believe that what they were saying was true. But the yellow carnations fell from your lips once more and she’s forced to wipe them away before Jinsoul stood properly to look at you.

They were desperate and time was running out. Either you believed them or they lose you forever. So, with a final resolve, Jinsoul leaned down, pressing her forehead against yours as her lips slotted perfectly against yours in a slow and tender kiss, one hand holding your cheek as you felt the wind knocked out of you.

She doesn’t give you time to respond because Sooyoung was quick to replace her, a little more aggressive, yet still gentle enough to not hurt you before she pulled away to kiss your forehead and the weight on your chest gradually began to fade away.

When they both give you enough space, your hand shoots to your mouth before your body is wracked by a violent coughing fit. Alarmed, the girls pressed the button on the wall to call for your doctor when blood slipped past your fingers and fell on the white sheets of the bed.

Everything happens fast as they’re basically thrown out of the room and your doctor hurries to check on you as the door closes. There are various things that they hear through the door but it dies down after a while, leaving a tense silence outside as the girls looked at the couple. “What happened? What did you do?” Heejin asked, terrified. But neither of them said anything as the door opened with your doctor looking perplexed but relieved.

“It would appear that Y/n will... no longer be needing the surgery.” He stated and Haseul’s shoulders tensed up as she came closer. “Why? Is she okay? What happened?” Your leader demanded and the male nodded his head before stepping aside.

“She’s coughed up quite a lot of the flowers, one of them containing the roots.” They were surprised by this as a nurse walked out of the room with the flowers in a plastic bag. “We’ll need an xray, but judging from that alone, it would appear that Y/n might be alright.”

Hearing that made Heejin’s knees buckle and she leaned on Jiwoo’s side for support whilst Hyejoo felt a lump forming in her throat when she gripped both Yerim’s and Chaewon’s arms and Kahei hugged Yeojin tightly as Junguen comforted her friends the best she could.

“We’ve taken off some of the machines and wires. She’s looking a bit better, just a bit more rest and food and I think she’ll be able to fully recover.” He informed them before turning to your manager, who smiled, feeling just as relieved from this whole ordeal.

All twelve girls entered your room when given the okay and you greet them all with a meek smile and a small wave of your hand. The color was back on your face and it looked like you have enough energy now compared to when they found you in the dorm.

Jinsoul and Sooyoung approached you with smiles on their faces. “You believe us now?” Sooyoung asked lightly and you blush, the red spreading to the tips of your ears as you slowly nodded your head. “I’m sorry you had to go through all of that. If we hadn’t been such cowards and assumed, this wouldn’t have happened.”

“To be fair, everyone else assumed we were dating.” Heejin piped up when she approached the bed to wrap her arms around you in a hug, kissing your cheek as she did, before Sooyoung gave her a warning glare as Jinsoul lightly pushed her.

Noticing the stare, your best friend laughed before she shook her head. “I mean, we do look good together. What do you say, Y/n? Will you date me instead?” You chuckled at your friend’s joke before giggling when you see the puppy eyes Jinsoul sent you and the slight huff that came from a pouting Sooyoung.

“I love you, Heejin, but you and I know that would be weird.” You give her a kiss as an apology, but she happily accepts it before turning to the other two. “Take care of her or else I’m really going to date her instead.”

“Yah!”

Sooyoung rolled her eyes in good nature before she took your hand. “We’re not letting go of her, you can bet on that.” Jinsoul nodded in agreement, smiling softly at you before she pressed a kiss to your cheek and you were finally able to smile a real one, one that showed the spark in your eyes and emanated the life that flowed through your veins.

And with a promise like Sooyoung’s and Jinsoul’s, you know that you wouldn’t have to hide your feelings or worry about the petals blooming in your lungs.

You were saved and they make sure to remind you that your love for each other was always going to be unconditional.

#girl group #girl group scenarios #girl group imagines #loona #loona scenarios #loona imagines #loona yves #yves loona #yves #ha sooyoung #yves scenarios #yves imagines #loona jinsoul #jinsoul loona #jung jinsoul #jinsoul #jinsoul scenarios #jinsoul imagines #yvesoul #poly yvesoul #hanahaki au