#things that would give people outside of tumblr a heart attack

[the-dragon-girl-27]

It is the middle of a Sunday afternoon. You have nothing on, and aren't expecting visitors, deliveries or post.

Unexpectedly, there is a knock at the door.

you are greeted by...... her

#fairy vs walrus #walrus vs fairy #walrus #why is this so well textured its fucking shitpost art #like why cant i pull this off in my normal art it had to be the walrus fairy #meme art #things that would give people outside of tumblr a heart attack #maybe #has the fairy vs walrus debate breached containment yet #also that generic girl i drew ended up looking a lot like how i look irl (yes i look like an npc) #also that door is unreasonably large but i needed you to be able to see the walrus in all her glory #i wanted it to be bigger so you could see her wings #fairy walrus #dragon draws creatures

[somethinginworl]

He would not fucking say that - Kirby franchise edition (Results)

Well! Seems like a lot of people had a lot to say about mischaracterized Kirby characters, as a matter of fact, there were a whooping 57 entries! Well, let’s get going with them, shall we? Just,,, beware that this is a LOOONG post.

Haltmann

The dude 100% did fucked up shit and needs to be held accountable but people seem to so easily forget the degree he was influenced/corrupted by Star Dream. I don't understand why people hate Haltmann and love Star Dream who is arguably the actual reason HWC started colonizing and draining planets. Also the fact that Haltmann isn't conventionally attractive to the majority of the fandom makes him less sympathetic ig?? But the dude is a grieving father who made mistakes that sent him down a spiral into being corrupted and then deleted by a heartless machine. I can't help but pity him

Prince Fluff

Go on ao3. Look in his tag on tumblr. He exists only to be Kirby or Shadow Kirby's love interest most of the time, with no personality of his own.

He barely gets recognized anymore, and if he does, it's usually as a ship Prince Fluff was a big part of my childhood, with Epic Yarn being my first game. To me, he was Kirby's fellow main character, and they had a cool sibling/best friend relationship. But now, a lot of what I see of him is just . . . Kirfluff. Which is cool and all, but man's a prince! He can do more than be a boyfriend! Heck, he runs an entire kingdom by himself! One thing that I want to see more of is Fluff as a stressed but caring ruler, not just a sidekick/boyfriend to the pink puff. Give yarn boy his deserved appreciation!.

Dark Meta Knight

Hello! I am here to spread the good word of a character with no personality. It's the mirror thing. Of course.  Dark Meta Knight has No Personality. Zero. Nada. Zilch. He's Meta Knight but Dark. What does that mean? Your guess. He fights Meta Knight. And wins lmao skill issue blueboy. And fights Kirby. And loses a few times, which isn't surprising. He was dumb enough to split Kirby in four, though. Four times the Kirby is four times the amount your ass is grass. You're practically a forest at that point because you're so grass. So he's violent and has no personality outside of being violent. Woo! Triple Deluxe has him attack Dedede in Dededetour inside the Mirror. This has led people to think he fucked over Sectonia. This makes my heart bleed as much as Taranza probably did when he was punted off of Royal Road via Fuck You Lightning Ball. My man just has no sense of timing,,,, They just wanted to include a Meta Knight battle because Knight Battles are a Kirby standard at this point,,, You think a man that stupid can figure out how to take advantage of a woman's insecurity? I don't even know if he knows women exist. How many female Amazing Mirror characters are there??? Boxy??? Moley mentions having a wife once and Dameta doesn't know what he means. But other than being driven to immense violence and being scapegoated for the stuff his boss probably did, Dameta has other hobbies! Like whatever his motivation in Star Allies is. Something dastardly, I'm sure. People really like to pretend he's not part of the Star Ally club when my man is doodling with toddlers and posing with his less cool less edgy self. Would a villain have a silly little we heart kirby statue? No, didn't think so. Also I cannot imagine him as a dad to Shadkirby either. Do they even interact? I've seen both "Amazing dad" and "Outright abusive" as interpretations and I can't go with either. But I think that's because I don't enjoy Metadad that much. They're like awkward coworkers. He thinks they're student and mentor. They're not even that. Dameta barely knows Shadow exists.

Dark Meta Knight is very popularly characterized as like an abusive parent, usually physically abusive. Mainly to Shadow Kirby, of course. He's an asshole, yeah, but not THAT bad, christ. I've seen multiple fics where Shadow Kirby is some poor little hey what t the fuck hes fighting himself. um. Back to being a hater.

Shadow Kirby

Some folks still think he's shy/cowardly like from the Amazing Mirror Days. Not really true anymore. From what fans have seen from the ending of the game, he does protect the Mirror World. As for the spin off games that include him, he's pretty tough and even creates mischief sometimes.

Shadow Kirby is constantly treated as an "evil" Kirby. Especially bad after Fighters and fighters two. Not to mention "Parallel Kirby". There's also a strangely common trend of making them more sapient than pink Kirby, who tends to be infantilised to hell and back. Shadow Kirby also is often treated as a complete coward who can't do anything right, when they aren't called evil.

He's shown as completely different in several different occasions, not only in personality but in design I like shadow kirby he's purple and then he's not

Dark Taranza

Dark Taranza, gonna be honest what little characterization people give him are actually okay compared to the rest. But I'm still a hater and hang on im watching jerma clips. okay. He's like Sectonia if Sectonia was Taranza if that makes sense.

Shadow Dedede

Shadow Dedede barely gets shit but I'm going to be a little hater anyways. I don't like most characterizations. I see people make him like a dictator like bro he's literally just some guy.

Sectonia

have you seen how often people say that  sectonia and taranza were boyfriend and girlfriend in canon?????? they were never!!! shes the gosh dang final boss but shes only ever used to give taranza angst. she is her own person with a personality!!!! yes their backstories are interconnected but gosh!!!!

This not too prominent but I can't stand it when people portray her as an uwu shy girl pre-corruption. While she gave in her worst aspects, she was probably always a kind of vain, girlboss! I mean she knows how to fight with rapiers c'mon!!!

idk it just feels like lots of people just see her as Taranza's tragic dead wife and like nothing else you know? like she is more than that and I feel like what little content we have of her proves that (like the soul boss descriptions (especially the original japanese text of the 2nd phase!!) and the eternal dream song) - or maybe im reading too much into those because im hyperfixating on my blorbo whoops

Kine

I'm not sure how true this opinion is considering how little people talk about Kine, I feel this is partially the anime's fault, or maybe its because of how he just looks, but Kine is cool and is not some stupid loser fish. Before the days of Crystal Shards, Him, Kirby, Rick & Coo were the dream team at the time, always hanging out going, with various activities long before the days of Meta Knight or even Dedede. Kine is an awesome aquatic rep for the Kirby series not to mention drinking and being a pirate and Kine even has a Wife! Kine has got it! I guess this is a partial compliant of Ship of Theseus which can be applied with Rick & Coo too, but I feel Kine gets the most hate if any because of people who are unfamiliar just see a dopey fish and are unaware of his origins and his past with Kirby. I'm not upset with the current representation of the Kirby cast (I love the RTDL team being the main crew) but I do hope the animal buddies get some more love, Especially Kine.

Dedede

reduced to his significantly less in-depth and compelling characterization from the anime

Anime Dedede.

Magolor

one time i read a series of fanfictions where he called every female character in the story a bitch and was portrayed as the good guy in the story

Is it possible to both be flanderized and woobified at the same time? There is a lot of "removing his responsibility for his actions" but can we get better jokes than "hehe Microtransgolor hehe scammer egg”

Always an uwu soft boy. Like no that is a criminal not a catboy.

Bro would never be intimidated by Magolor

Marx

People either portray him as a edgy sociopath or constantly bored and annoyed. Portraying him as an adult or a teen kinda annoys me as well. I'm very picky about portrayals of Marx so don't get upset if you portray him as one of these I've listed.

Sometimes I see people only joking about the "hungry so he came along" thing with Marx and it's pretty overdone

They took one look at him and said “to the insane asylum bitch”. I don’t think he’s some crazy murder hobo rather a dude with questionable morals and puts his own mischief and fun before others it seems. Though Marx is indeed one of the least “character” characters when I mean he doesn’t have much depth in comparison to other characters. But you could do anything else than have him follow the Jevil path of him being crazy. Make him evil? Sure. Make him a cringefail idiot? Sure. Make him a crybaby bitch? Go ahead. But making him the definition of what a 14 year old white girl in New Jersey that probably is addicted to Instagram and thinks Webtoon comics are the highest level of art and storytelling’s definition of insane doesn’t cut it cuz. Slapping the spaz label without a thought of what’s being done on a character who fits the mark makes the Schizoid peeved who coulda known. As this is all coming from the one person who has likely ruined Marx’s character the most for Kirblur by making him a somewhat empathetic manchild who clings to both pipe dreams of normality and being a monster btw. (Also this doesn’t mean jokes, you can joke about him being a psycho like Jerma it’s when it’s taken 100% seriously is when it’s bad).    Also to add on, Woobification of Marx or any Kirby character period CAN be annoying if taken too far. I take full responsibility in the fact my variant is also woobifed to an extent but that train full of ticking bombs doesn’t bother me as much. Make him sadcry and be gay he deserves both those things. Send him to sad hell with the rest of them.

To the anon above... What?

Making him stupid or reducing him to just Silly Clown. Or just having him act in purely impulsive or spontaneous ways (which sometimes happens when juxtaposed with a more "collected" character like Magolor).

Daroach

this is something i’ve noticed specifically in chatfics, but when daroach is in the ensemble some of them tend to designate him as the Goofy Meme Dumbass for… idk, fandom quota? i really don’t know why it happens because he has a bunch of canon dialogue (and alternate continuity stuff like the novels) that show him to be cool and clever. i’m not saying he can’t have a sense of humor or anything (he’s definitely the type to have a bunch of quips), but it sucks when he’s mischaracterized because the fandom doesn’t give him that much attention as is. if you NEED a silly haha guy, marx is right there!”

Morpho Knight

"Morpho Knight is a creature of mercy. It's a benevolent entity putting tired souls to rest." NO?! I'm going to copy-paste some stuff I put in a post of my own. A while back, SYZekrom on Reddit translated Morpho Knight's entry, and it contains some... interesting information. Allow me to provide some excerpts. "He’s a red knight with butterfly wings, continuing from a pair of white wings like an angel’s, and a pair of azure wings with a bit of an evil feel." This is the first of two instances where Morpho Knight is outright stated to be evil. There's also stuff in the art book that supports my theory that Galacta and Morpho are permanently fused and the former is not dead, but I don't want to get carried away. These are its gacha figure descriptions in Forgotten Land: "The fluttering fiend that casts judgment upon final battles is drawn toward the isolated isles of Forgo Dreams. There, it feasts on the most powerful soul it finds and takes the fearsome form of a scarlet-clad knight… Let the most challenging battle of this new world begin!" –English "One of the dreaming birds, which are said to pass judgement upon decisive battles, drifts towards a forgotten, isolated isle as if summoned. There, it sips upon the strongest Soul and descends as a red knight. Finally, welcome the dusk… of the deadliest battle in this New World!"  –Japanese While at first glance there doesn't seem to be any information of note, the "fluttering fiend" bit in the English version is outright stating Morpho Knight is evil, and the phrase "he deadliest battle in this New World" doesn't sound particularly heroic. But I digress... Morpho is NOT a good person! This is clearly leading up to a villain vs hero confrontation! Which, may I add, implies that reaping Galacta Knight wasn't necessarily a good thing for it to do?!

Elfilis

elfilis is NOT entirely malicious. they would gladly accept hugs and kisses. being in a fucking capsule ALONE and AWARE for likely CENTURIES will DO SOMETHING TO YOU YOU KNOW?? god fucking DAMN dude... and after the ending of the true arena in the game, WILLINGLY GAVE THEMSELF UP TO ELFILIN. also they're not fucking DEAD you PSYCHOPAYHS elfilis is STILL VERY MUCH ALIVE!!!!!!! RUUAAAGGGH!!!!!!!!!!

Susie

Being Evil or being a Sad uwu girl who has had bad things happen to her seems to be the only way most people can portray this character.

Susie isn't a friend. She's selfish and wanted to take over the company. Her "redemption" is pointing Kirby at the world-ending machine, gives him armor, and then stands around. She doesn't even know his name. The closest she does for good is tell Kirby to do something he would've done on his own.

My girl really became the subject of hate thanks to a mistranslation. I mean yeah she likes robots and shit but the fact that people think she is a terrible person and that she's still colonizing planets makes me upset. i blame the translation team for everything.

When people say she has fully redeemed herself and is reduced to cishet, pretty girl??? Like no, star allies mistranslation my ass you fell for her corporate propaganda. The female characters in this franchise, while lovable, is not nearly as popular as a lot of the male ones. HAL literally gave us a morally grey girlboss who we can still sympathise with. She actually feels like a very real character in this fictional world.

You Know How People Are About Her

she's not even my blorbo!!!!!! everyone thinks she's a huge evil bitch who has done terrible genuinely unspeakable things. i read a fic that went on and on abt the horrible things she "did" to meta knight when he was mechanized (things so bad i cant even say) and i was pulling my hair out she did not fucking do any of that!!!! yes the universe can have pretty dark moments but good lord people only use her to woobify meta knight and give fuel to ship him with others and it pisses me off lol. or people go too far the other way and woobify HER to ship with him and aughhhh no one has a shred of media literacy. she's not purely good or purely evil she's such a complex character who did bad things because she was in a bad situation and the best example of a morally grey character who's on no one's side but herself and that will always be more interesting that 100% good or 100% evil. once again she's not even my blorbo but i've never seen a character butchered this badly by a fandom

Because of mistranslation (from what I've heard) Susie's whole mechanizing planets has been the number one thing when it came to susie hate and the only reason as to why people hate this girl so much. Honestly Susie's character has been fucked up immensely and no one has such a divided spread of opinions like she does. Some people brush away her backstory and make her a soulless being with no love whatsoever.

Oh my god. Oh my god. Susie Haltmann. I cannot with the fandom interpretations anymore. It's ridiculous how bad they've gotten. Susie is a two dimensional character. I absolutely despise seeing people portray her as some sort of greedy capitalist bastard and "the one with the braincell". In canon, she's consistently been portrayed as a sweet person (with a knack for violence, but EVERYONE in this series is like that). Everything bad she did in Planet Robobot was FOR WORK and the will of HER FATHER, and even if she did want to do the things she did, she's clearly not doing them any more. The "mechanizing planets and peoples" line in Star Allies is a mistranslation. And the "punishing savages" doesn't have to mean anything bad. It could mean she's punishing evildoers with her money and resources. In fact, I've seen some translations put it like that And Meta Knight... is just the straw that broke the camel's back. Oh lord. Why does everyone insist that he hates her? There's the little scene in Star Allies... but god, that isn't canon, it's clearly a joke. If anything, Susie might have been trying to talk to him and he was just trying to avoid her in a misinterpretation of the situation. It's supposed to be funny. Why are you imposing this onto people like this automatically makes Susie a devil incarnate and anything involving those two characters in problematic? Just shut up.

Meta Knight

Everyone thinks he’s just the ‘edgy character’ or ‘the uncaring mentor figure’ while in actuality he really does care for Kirby (and Bandana Dee) more than anyone gives him credit for!

Everyone either makes him all broody and lonesome, like shadow the hedgehog or batman; or they make him a goofy dad, like Dedede or Hugh Neutron. In reality, he's a weird uncle with unknown motivations, simultaneously selfish and practical. Also, he doesn't hide the fact that he likes sweets, he eats them away from everyone so no one steals them (Dedede and Squeak Squad).

He's not Kirby's fucking dad! He's an irresponsible uncle that hands out swords! And he is definitely in love with dedede, he is the only other dramatic bitch willing to build a skyscraper to beat up kirby (I am using intense anger for comedic effect) 

HES A FUCKING TWINK ASS FRUITY ASS MOTHERFUCKING CRINGEFAIL MAN. HE NEEDS TO HAVE HIS PERSONALITY INTERPRETED AS BOTH THE MANGA AND THE GAMES. YES HE IS MYSTERIOUS BUT HE ALSO WOULD TRIP AND FALL OVER HIMSELF. I NEED STAR ALLIES KICKING SWORD PISSED. I NEED MANGA ROSES BITCHASS META. I NEED THAT PARTICULAR VERSION OF MY BOY meat knight RIGHT NOW. meta knight is cringefail. half of the fandom agrees the other half does not. im explode.

He wants to look cool so bad but he is actually a huge fucking goofy goober. Any representation of Meta Knight being a badass is propaganda made by Meta Knight himself to convince you he’s cool. I mean have you seen his RTDL Deluxe pause screen description? King Dedede’s and Bandana Dee’s are in first person, but his is in third person? He’s literally talking about himself in the third person like hello????? Meta Knight is such a fucking lame goofy little man who thinks he’s the most badass motherfucker on the planet.

To fair this has been less common lately but back during 2014-2016 MK was usually portrayed in fanart/fanfic as either this wise veteran or cold edgelord. He is just an unhindged!!! Silly!!! Guy!!! He can be cool and cringefail!!! But he is also compassionate in his own aloof, awkward way!!! 

i am not a big fan of the metadede ship. i think people are shipping for the sake of having a ship and nothing else. As someone with a severely underrepresented orientation (aromantic and asexual), when I see a character I like, I will project onto said character. This is the case with my interpretation of Meta Knight. I saw a cool character that I liked who a) doesn’t have any canon love interests and b) didn’t really need a whole ton of friends/significant others to be happy with life. Meta Knight always seemed to be perfectly content with the friends he has on Popstar and his crew and everyone in the anime, so I looked to him for hope that I could live the same way. I was open to the metadede ship at first, but as time passed, I felt less and less comfortable with it. It seemed to me that people were so hungry for gay ships that they just pulled this one out of thin air courtesy of Kirby Fighters 2, which is to my knowledge the only piece of media that somewhat supports this. Why can’t people just be happy with MK and Dedede being friends or frenemies? I’m probably starting drama with this bc I know how popular metadede is on Tumblr so I apologize for upsetting you if that is the case.  But I also feel that I shouldn’t apologize just because I have a different opinion.

I dislike how "pathetic" the fandom has made him out to be. I don't like it when he's portrayed as overpowered but... "pathetic, whiny manlet" could not be further from the truth. How did we get to that?

Kirby

Often people make Kirby more dependent on others than he actually is. He's an extremely independent person that literally cannot be stopped by anyone who tries to get in his way

ik its been covered to death but matpat made that video about how kirby is evil and completely ignored the themes of friendship and kindness that are present throughout the entire series

dude hes not a baby. he drinks in the manga adukt kirbies are a fine interp god. and hes not a godkiller or some shit he just fights for his friends hes not some terrifying monster kirby is literally just some friendly guy. strong yeah but just some guy. he fights strong entities incidentally lol

The anime portrays them as a literal infant, and due to its overprevalence (despite not being in the same stream of canon as the games), this is often their characterization in the fandom.  Canonically, they indeed are a child (at most, they'd probably be a teen in the modern games), but they are old enough to talk, and they demonstrate a high amount of emotional and even technical intelligence.

Admittedly, this is one that usually only happens to people outside the fandom, but it bugs me when people portray Kirby as a sort of immoral monster who only does good things on accident. When it’s quite the opposite! He may not be incredibly bright, but he does his best to help people. Oddly enough, there’s not many cases of “he would not say that” in the fandom for me because of how loose Kirby’s story is. It is lore heavy but the actual characters aren’t super concrete save for a few and I think that’s perfectly fine

People forget that their air bullet!! is an attack!! its literally one of their only ways of dealing damage in DL1!!! I’m looking at you Smash Bros!!! Why isn’t it their nair?????????

making them a toddler who cant speak for themself

I swear everyone outside of the fandom sees Kirby as either a braincell infant or  a merciless force of mass destruction

Taranza

WHAT DIDN'T THEY DO!?!?!? Taranza, as we see him in Triple Deluxe, is such a fun villain. He's dramatic, arrogant, a total suck-up to Sectonia, and it's so. Fucking. Good. He's a devious bastard, he monologues!!! His animations in the Clash games are so fucking campy and dramatic it's chefs kiss!!!! Fanon Taranza is as plain as white bread. Sometimes as pale as it, looking at some of the gijinkas. No shade though! As little shade as there is melanin in him lmAO- He is flanderised to hell and back. There are so. Many. Fucking. Taranzas who happen to be nothing but sad and weepy about his evil dead wife. Where's the bite!!! The pizzazz!!! Even in canon, when he is a bit of a wet sack later on, he still hunts for an altar he can bring her back on. My boy's a wannabe necromancer!!! Write that shit in your lost lenore Sectonia fic you fucking cowards Queen's Phantom ain't just for show. The above is also evidence for woobification! The fucker is obviously sad his crush is dead! But can we pleeease focus on anything else. This is definitely not targeted at Hal Labs. Imagine being woobied so hard your creators backtrack your personality I would just die. "Ehehe he's the responsible mage!!" No the fuck he isn't he can't be trusted with anything he tries take control it WILL blow up in his face. He knows magic he's good at magic but is he responsible??? Fuck no my man's strongest attack is "Blow myself the fuck up via a giant burst of magic" and it shreds. Even worse is the "Taranza got mind-controlled by Sectonia" theory in tandem with this. That wasn't confirmed right. Right. God I hope not that would be embarrassing. He can't even have a moment to realise his devotion has gone too far and she doesn't love him or even care for him, and he has to finally make that decision to free himself from her like ain't that cool!!! And then making him all sad over her afterwards it's just a Little Fucked if you're tryna put it all together eh. Eh. And he's not suuuper objectified (That usually goes to Seccy rest in piss girlie) but the way he's treated in some ships is. Eugh. Fucking Magoranza amirite he's basically there to look responsible and cute (I've already explained my issue with this) and to fix the tortured soul who is Magolor (I do not like Magolor. Nor Magoranza.) Tbh Sectaranza does the same he's there to be tragic because his girlie's dead. When you give him less personality than the dead cardboard cutout you know you fucked up. Anyways these ramblings are here to remind you what Hal Labs stole from us: Taranza but not a TOTAL saddo. Theatre kid Taranza. Arrogant prick. He's even British.

For the anon above me, I just wanted to say that this entry is probably my favorite and lives rent free in my mind.

I'm definitely guilty of it and it's all we have to go off of but PLEASE he needs more than to be Sad. Give him hobbies and interests that aren't just gardening, at least. Make stuff up about him, please!

So, SO many people make him an absolute crybaby over Sectonia. Even though, yes, he has grief problems, it's not his whole freaking personality. Pretty sure they're forgetting the fact that he LITERALLY HELPED KILL HER.

Taranza is not just a little pathetic guy!! He’s a bitch— a little schemer if you will !!! He’s smug—he’s formal—he’s a little fucker!!! Taranza needs a new partner and that partner is me

Oddly enough I do think people make him out to be a bit too much of a goody two shoes. Like he has done some mean things in the past and it wasn’t all Sectonia’s fault, he literally *stole* the Dimensional Mirror after all. Don’t get me wrong I think he’s a good person in the end, but cmon. He has committed crimes

Taranza in some corners of the fandom has kinda been turned into this forever crying baby who can never recover from losing Joronia and like, I never see people who do that write about the recovery and being able to move on to the final stage of grief.

HE IS NOT A SIMP, MY GOD

Everyone needs to stop reducing him to pathetic simp. He is allowed to grieve but he's probably one of the more mature characters within the series???

People disregard everything else about his character to make his tragic relationship with sectonia his only character trait. Not sure if this quite counts as woobifying since he does canonically still mourn her (and obviously seeing a close friend/crush go down the path of self destruction and ultimately die from it WOULD NOT be something you'd get over quickly). But I'm so tired of taranza in fanart and the like being an uwu softboy with Crying as his main character trait. Like he's canonically more than that! He goes full cocky villain mode when you confront him near the end of triple deluxe and he can pack a punch in star allies with his magic! If you're going to write about him prove that you don't just know about the guy from twitter artwork!

And here’s a graph!

Anyways, thanks everyone for your submissions! What I’ve learned here is important: We’re all fucking delusional.

#I'm going to fist fight the Tumblr editor #Kine anon Ily #Kirby #Rambles #Long post

[violetlunette]

Runaway Chapter 4: Poison_Part 2

Summary: Lilia tries to speak with Malleus about everything. But will Malleus listen?

<-Previous Chapter

Master List

Ao3

Notes: *I had to split this as Tumblr no long takes long posts *Twst spoilers for Chapter/Book 7

For a moment, Lilia looked as if he had been struck. He stumbled back a step. His heart stopped as, for a second, the world lost sound and color.

There was a beat before Lilia was able to snap back to reality.

Once he did, his ruby gaze dropped, shame and guilt sitting on each shoulder.

“I…” He swallowed as his throat grew thick before forcing the words out. “I had to.” He lifted a hand to rub some feeling back into his arm, which had gone numb.

Lilia knew this talk was coming, but he didn’t think it would be so soon.

“...You were already against humans as it was back then. You blamed them for everything you lost and thought they were just verminous savages that destroyed everything they touched,” he explained as if to justify himself. He couldn’t lift his head to look at the other, and his body slumped forward as he thought of his son. His son, who had gone and... “I didn’t want you to hate Silver for something he was innocent of.” 

Malleus’ lips pulled back to reveal his fangs.

“His father killed my mother,” he growled, his voice rumbling. Against the stone, his hand curled into fists. Lilia’s head shot up.

“Malleus--”

“His father killed my mother--” Malleus repeated, lashing an arm out and interrupting the other before he could speak. Lilia had to leap away to avoid the attack. “--invaded our territory, attacked our people--And yet you raised his child?!”

B O O M!

As his temper flared, the storm outside grew stronger. The light of its lightning filled the room with white, illuminating Malleus’ fury and Lilia’s shock and guilt.

At first, Lilia stepped back, but then he stepped forward, a fire in his chest.

“Malleus, calm down! Silver had nothing to do with any of that!” he yelled to be heard over the bellow of the storm and the screech of the wind, which rattled the windows. The flame spread throughout the rest of Lilia’s body, giving him the strength to stand up for his son. His.

“Silver never did anything!” he told the other. “You can’t hold him accountable for things that happened before he was even born!”

“He still carries his blood,” Malleus hissed, his tone cracking like fire. “How could you--”

“He was a freaking baby lying alone in a cursed castle! If I hadn’t, he would have died!”

“That’s—”

“What, Malleus?!” Lilia challenged. He stepped forward. Malleus stepped back, away from the window. “That’s what?! He was a child, a baby! A baby who never did anything wrong!”

Indeed, Silver never committed any sin. He was a sweet, loving child who did his best to help those around him and was kind to even the cruelest soul. Silver was passionate and only desired the strength to care for others. He didn't deserve the blame of others. To be held accountable for the wrongs of his fathers, to suffer--

Lilia tried to calm his temper, but it was hard. 

He felt like he had to fight for Silver, but at the same time, he knew that fighting wasn’t what anyone needed.

After all, Malleus was suffering as well.

Malleus had just learned two horrible truths that Lilia always knew would break the young prince. 

He had realized his life came at the cost of another's life span, someone he cared for enough to blot over and nearly die at his phantom's hands. On top of that, the dragon learned that a child he loved was descended from the ones who stole everything from him.

What Malleus needed wasn't an enemy right now. He needed a friend, someone to care for him.

Lilia took a breath.

“I know you’re angry at me, and you have every right to be,” he emphasized. “But I never wanted to hurt you.” He reached out again, trying to let his love reach the child he spent so long trying to hatch. Malleus dodged the touch.

Malleus didn’t want to accept anything from the bat right now. He was angry. He was upset. More than that, he was hurt.

“You lied to me.” Lilia betrayed him. Malleus and his family. He deceived Malleus all this time, even though the dragon trusted him more than anything. All for that human.

He turned and walked away from Lilia until he was standing before the fireplace.

The flames cricked and cackled as they flickered, their light creating tall shadows from the grate that loomed over the two like witnesses to a crime.

Lilia followed Malleus, trying to reason with him. When he spoke, his tone was desperate.

“I did it for you.” Malleus scoffed, causing the other to droop. “And for myself,” he admitted.

“Before your father died, he left a dream that humans and fae could live together in peace. I tried to share that dream, but... Lilia's eyes dropped as he lifted a hand to rub a stiff neck. “ As I said, you hated humans. And I worried that one day that hatred would grow and history would repeat itself.

“But that changed when you met Silver.” Despite everything, Lilia smiled softly at the memory.

Malleus had been surprised to see his guardian holding a human baby that day. He was distasteful at the sight, but as soon as Lilia shoved Silver into his arms, the fierce dragon instantly softened to mush. That was the first time Lilia had hope that Malleus could change.

“Despite just meeting Silver and your prejudices, you instantly began to worry for him. You came by just to see how he was and how he was growing. You made sure he was eating alright, praised him as he learned to walk and fight, and taught him to use his magic.” He lifted his head and beamed, a soft chuckle dancing from his lips.

“You even came to a college full of humans,” he hummed. “All because you found you were able to care for one.”

Malleus’ face scrunched as he fought back tears. The memory of the other brought up feelings of love and care for the human babe, but they were quickly burned by his anger and pain.

“But it was all a lie,” he said, rejecting the feeling Lilia tried to offer.

“You misled me. Had I known the truth, known who he was, I never—I never--” Malleus choked back a sob as his body quaked, unable to hold in his emotions.

“Never would have cared for him?” Lilia finished for him, his face cool and his voice hard as stone. He folded his arms across his chest and stood to his full height. Despite it not being as impressive as the other’s, it had the desired effect.

“I know. I knew that if you knew the truth, you never would have even given that child a chance.” Lilia lifted a hand to his head, his mind beginning to spin from stress. He closed his eyes to combat the oncoming migraine.

“What do you want, Malleus? Do you want to kill Silver for something his father did?!” But hadn’t Lilia been the same? Hadn’t he played with the idea of killing the boy to get revenge for all that was lost?

At his words, Malleus’ skin lost its color as his jaw clenched.

The dragon fell silent and turned away, staring intently at the flame as the fire inside him ate away.

The pain bubbled and boiled inside him until his body felt like a pot about to boil over. It was so intense that Malleus worried he would blot over again.

Instead, Malleus did much worse.

“I wish you never found him,” he said, the words cracking like his heart. His hair hid his wet eyes. “I wish you had never brought him into our lives.” Each word was like a drip of poison.

A part of him felt this was a lie. Another part meant every word.

If Lilia hadn’t brought Silver into his life—had Lilia not allowed him to care for that human—then his heart wouldn’t be aching the way it was.

He wouldn’t be in so much pain.

The silence that fell was thick. Even the rumbling of the storm outside couldn’t pierce it.

Neither move. Neither spoke. Neither looked at the other.

Finally, the world shattered like glass.

“Well—” Lilia said, voice shaking with emotion, his lips curling in a sneer. “Then perhaps it’s a good thing Silver’s gone.”

There was a clack of heels as Lilia turned away, then the groan of the door, followed by a SLAM!

Then there was nothing.

Krrr, krrk, fssh...

Malleus never turned away from the flickering flames before him. His brow wrinkled as he fought back the tears, which made his eyes shine like glass.

Outside, lightning clashed. Thunder roared. The wind screeched as it raked past the window like claws.

Finally, the world became too much for him.

Malleus’ face collapsed into his hands as his emotions came pouring out.

“AUGHH--!”

~To be continued...~

Next ->

So. Nice talk, huh? I mean, Lilia didn't get hit by lightning, so that's something...

Anyway, we catch up with our runaway next time, so stay tuned!

#twst #mine #twisted wonderland #lilia vanrouge #disney twst #twst spoilers #twst wonderland #disney twisted wonderland #twst malleus #malleus draconia #twisted wonderland malleus #twst diasomnia #twst disney #twisted wonderland lilia #lilia twst #lilia twisted wonderland #twst lilia #Twst Runaway

[specialmoogakii]

Would Peter adopt a baby(either gender)he found outside his door while living with YN?He's so sweet and would be a great father

Oooh. I love this! I do like when someone doesn't treat Peter as a heartless mf. I still believe that Tumblr Peter's blog is the original one (Don't really like the game version,im sorry- ajudswbwk)

The first thing peter would think about the kid is how they end up here. His house is pretty isolated and surrended by trees. Whoever abandoned this baby in here,somehow they know someone live in this house and that kinda freak out Peter.

(in case he kidnap you,if not,then he just questioned who the fuck is so heartless to leave this baby here)

It depends all on the Y/n. After all,peter want them to feel comfortable in their house (kidnap or not) so if they are not ready to take care of a kid, peter will still help this poor kiddo to find an house. He is not heartless.

But if Y/n do want that baby (whatever is the reason),then Peter will welcome it in their little family. Just like how he wanted. Just him,Y/n, his snake and their new kid. His dream come true.

Peter would start preparing himself to take care of the kids (mostly economically cuz pretty sure he studied how to take care of them beforehand.) So,All Y/n need to do is spending time with the baby while Peter search ways to balance the money and not going bankrupt out of pure excitement.

Thank to the baby arriving in this household,Y/n can finally have freedom to go out; going to the park,seeing people again and hopefully their friends... with peter's approval.

He is absolutely good at taking care of the little rascal and how to entertain them and managing the current baby's need. Of course its doesn't mean Y/n doesn't do anything,y/n can join at anytime and help peter (he defs need it even if he say no).

Peter won't do the same errors his mother did,he would be very attentive and absolutely sweetheart with your kid,treating them the same amount of love as y/n.

The only thing that probably not a good idea is the kid having the snake. They probably think its a toy and it would give peter an heart attack. He know the snake won't hurt them but the other way around.

Even if the baby don't mean it,he would lecture them and teach them how to treat the pet properly.

Overall,im pretty sure Peter is a very active father and totally sweet toward the kid. (Wish i had that)

And Y/n is really lucky cuz now they can finally go out without the need to beg or medical conditions. Y/n love peter but sometimes they can be a little too much.

#yourboyfriendgame #your boyfriend game #your boyfriend lucy #your boyfriend tk #your boyfriend x reader #your boyfriend peter #yb fandom #ybgpeter #yb game #x reader #yandere

[asvospace]

୨୧┇"What are 5 Things that make YOU Happy?" ᡣ𐭩ྀིྀ‧₊˚ ⋅🧘🏻‍♀️🌷

For me personally (not ranked):

1. Sunny Afternoons/Golden Hour -> When I come home, I usually see the sun’s warm rays filtering through the trees outside my bedroom window, and it just fills me with so much love and admiration for nature and just the little things yk? (+ It’s so relaxing to see<3)

2. My Headphones & Music!! -> I own the Sony WH-1000XM3 (I totally recommend it, best type of headphones out there imo, the noise cancelling is heavenly and the headphones themselves are super comfortable<3), and listening to music like r&b, bossa nova, the wonder girls, kali uchis, asian hits from the 80's and sometimes just a chill instrumental is so wonderful<3

3. Reading Cozy Fantasy Books<3 -> I’m getting back into this genre and honestly, I should’ve done so sooner! All I can say for this one is that I love love love cozy fantasy, it’s such a comfort to me<3 I’m currently (slowly) reading two books that have been recommended a lot in this genre (both covers are so beautiful too!):

♡ “Can’t spell Treason without Tea” by Rebecca Thorne

♡ “Legends & Lattes” by Travis Baldree (a lot of people love this one!)

4. Nature Walks at the Park or a National Reserve -> (with good weather) This is honestly such a good way to improve your mood, reduce any anxiety or worries you may have as well as just helping you feel more relaxed and at ease.

5. Sleeping!!!!! -> Being able to just sleep peacefully without having to anticipate when your alarm is going to give you a mini heart attack or when you have to get up early is so magical to me for some reason. I can just sleep without a care in the world and wake up on my own terms.

🎀 notes: I wasn't able to fit this in but spending time with my family (and friends) is definitely up there of course! I love family movie nights and hanging out! There are so many things that make me happy and that I'm grateful for, I can't possibly fit them all in to one post..I think Tumblr would crash if I did lmao :3

xoxo,

⌗ 𐑺・raine 𓂃꒰🧸꒱ / @asvospace

#asvospace #girlblogging #girlblogger #just girly things #coquette #gotta love life #grateful #thankful #positivity #happy #what makes you happy #what makes me happy #girl blogging #girl blogger #gratitude #gratitude post!!! #appreciation post #<3 #cozy fantasy books

[harapeveco]

heyy so ive loved eves songs for a while now and i really wanna delve into their lore. so far ive seen the names of the characters from his mvs, but is there a story? what are the characters like? im so curious and i would love to know where to start reading into it. thank you!! c:

Oof well gotta be honest with you bestie that is a very difficult question…the simpler answer to that is yes and no

The more complicated answer is it depends on how you see those MVs, everything it’s pretty much up to your interpretation. There are some MVs however that are connected to each other to some extent, those being Nonsense Bungaku, Dramaturgy, Outsider and Last Dance all of these make a reference to the characters that appear in each one so most fans agree they are part of the same story. There are two other MVs that are undoubtedly related, these being Inochi no Tabekata and Fight Song, the second one being a sequel to the first. Another interesting case is the one of Tokyo Ghetto that also has cameos of characters from the aforementioned songs and its main character appearing on Inochi no Tabekata several times, which makes everyone believe they are connected…as far as a “story” goes related to his MVs that’s the most I can give you

As of lore there’s a bit of it. You probably have noticed how in every MV there’s a human and a creature/monster like thing with said human. Those creatures are called Zingai and they can be described as the physical manifestation of a person’s heart (if you’ve ever played a Persona game it’s literally the same thing). Usually Zingai are friendly with their human and pretty much do whatever their human wants them to do but there are times where they become unstable and attack their humans. Good examples of this are the end of Dramaturgy and Tokyo Ghetto

There’s more I could explain ofc but where’s the fun of that when you can read it yourself and make your own theories too! Idk if you are aware but Eve has two mangas! One of them is Kara no Kioku which is the story of a complete new character discovering what Zingai are (which explains better the whole human/zingai dynamic) and another one called Inochi no Tabekata which as you can assume follows the MVs’ protagonist and his origin story (this manga also has a light novel counterpart you can find the first two volumes translated here on tumblr). There’s a third one but it’s more of a gag type 4koma manga called Tobi to Ryuuko which is about the two characters from Fight Sing vibing together

That’s all I can say regarding this tbh. Most of the lore or story (not taking the mangas and light novel into consideration) is mostly your own interpretation. Some people like to say some MVs are canon while others aren’t bc they don’t see them fitting their idea of continuity while others (like me) like to believe every MV is related to some extent. I think that’s the best aspect of being an Eve fan, you can just put your own thoughts on it and you won’t be wrong

#answered ask #im sorry if this isn’t too much help but the eve lore is complicated #and it has gotten more complicated over the years so yeh…hope this helped a bit tho! #this is the easiest what I could put it and I still think it’s not enough #tho the mangas and novels help a lot they have a shitty pacing and very weird choices but oh well #they do their job explaining some stuff at least

[blueberry-ovaries]

MISC. TAG GAME:

thank you for the tag @ronald-speirs, @panzershrike-pretz @malarkgirlypop and @grumpy-liebgott !!! sorry it took me so long!

Favorite place in the world you’ve visited?

oooh okay so recently i came back from europe, and i literally loved it so much! i oddly enough LOVED vatican city! and i absolutely adored venice and paris! however, london was also really nice! (i cannot decide i’m so sorry😭)

Something you’re proud of yourself for?

Honestly, going to University! Even when it’s hard and i hate it and have no idea what i’m doing, the fact i made it into university is something i’m very proud of!

Favourite books?

the picture of dorian gray - Oscar Wilde

a good girls guide to murder - Holly Jackson

5 survive - Holly Jackson

the outsiders - S.E Hinton

of mice and men - John Steinbeck

Something that makes your heart happy when you think about it?

my dog :) - his name is cisco and he was free to a good home and under fed, and now he gets treats every time we leave the house and sleeps on the bed

Favourite thing about your culture?

about being Australian? I would suppose our love for sport. We play so many sports over here and we support the aussies even if we don’t like the sport! For example the Matilda’s, our women’s soccer team! Soccer isn’t as big as AFL over here, but i’ve never seen so much support behind Womens soccer, let alone ANY soccer, as we’re very proud of our sporting teams!

When did you join the HBO War fandom? What was the first show you watched?

close to two years ago? i’m not too sure, but i watched BoB first!

Have you read any of Easy Company’s books? If so, which ones were your favorite?

I have not! but i am trying to get my hands on the Dick Winters and Ron Speirs books!

Favorite HBO War character and your favorite moment with them?

Babe Heffron! and the “are you serious?! only the goddamn nuns call me Edward” BUT the scene with Gene in the fox hole where Babe mocks Gene calling him Babe is a very close second

Do you make content for any fandoms, if so; what sort of content?

i have been known to dabble in other fandoms on other apps in fanfic writing 🤭

Favorite actor/actress and your favorite film of theirs?

ANDREW GARFIELD!!! and i am The Amazing spider-man enthusiast!!! (plus hacksaw ridge is a masterpiece)

Favorite quote/s that you wish to share with others?

Some quotes my dad likes to tell me when i’m really anxious over university/ actively having a panic attack are:

“you can only do what you can do” - which pretty much means that all i can do is my best, and the rest will sort itself out, there’s no use stressing over situations i have no control over.

“how do you eat an elephant?” - which basically means, to tackle something large you take it one step at a time, ergo - to eat an elephant you eat it piece by piece

Random fact your mutuals/followers don’t know about you?

Oh God, i’m not a very interesting person 🧍🏼‍♀️

I got swooped by birds in a century once and have hated birds ever since

If you’re a writer, do you need a beta reader (say yes so I can be your beta reader 🤭)?

i do not have a beta reader 🤭 so position is potentially open 🤭

Three things that make you smile?

- sunsets! i LOVE watching sunsets i just think they are so pretty!

- rainy days (only when i’m inside) But i love rainy days, when i can sit by a window to read or do homework etc. I just think there is something so beautiful about rain!

- chocolate chip cookies :) my FAVOURITE cookies! i do not care if they are basic i love them sm

Any nicknames you like?

most of my nicknames :) But especially the nicknames that my parents give me :))

List some people you love to see around on tumblr:

i’m so sorry if i forget anyone @malarkgirlypop @ronald-speirs @ronsparky @mads-nixon @panzershrike-pretz @executethyself35 @next-autopsy @winnielefou @1waveshortofashipwreck @footprintsinthesxnd @caffeinated-fan @dontirrigateme @softliebgott @xxluckystrike @easycompany123 (+ all my mutuals who i have not tagged, love y’all i just have shocking name recollection)

What would you do during a zombie apocalypse?

i mean it would depend on what kinda zombies?? But most likely keeping friends and family alive.

Realistically, dying. i’m not dealing with all that.

Favorite movie?

mulan!!! i LOVE mulan (clearly… i’m literally writing a fic with mulan ideas)

Do you like horror movies?

i got a live hate relationship with them. Like i HATE religious horror with a passion, it freaks me the fuck out, but the conjuring series has great story lines?? However i watched the nun once and i swear to god i almost shit myself whenever k had to leave my room at night?! I was CONVINCED that motherfucker was gonna be in my house.

NO PRESSURE TAGS: @mads-nixon @easycompany123 @executethyself35 @montied @ronsparky @dontirrigateme (plus everyone else who would like to do this! consider this an offical tag!)

#madsasks #madsrambles #blueasks #bluerambles #band of brothers #babe heffron #ronald speirs #bandofbrothers #dick winters #eugene roe #george luz #hbowar #band of brothers #donald malarkey

[summercourtship]

stay to burn (only to drown instead): chapter two: hard times in the city [part I]

masterpost | ao3 link

jonathan crane x reader; bruce wayne x reader; edward nashton x reader | warnings: canon typical violence, sexual themes | word count: 7813 words

DISCLAIMER: these chapters are not meant to be read alone. not every chapter has content for one of the three pairings listed. this is an ongoing fanfiction that I am cross-posting here on tumblr, not a series of one-shots.

chapter one

The rest of the semester passed quickly, your schedule filled with finals, papers, and studying. Your bruises faded within two weeks, your lip shrunk back down to its normal size, and you were finally able to look in the mirror without recoiling in shock. People quickly forgot that you’d been beaten up when not confronted by your wounds constantly, and they finally stopped asking what happened because of it. You returned to your usual seat in your classes and tried to stop your heart from fluttering whenever you saw the Bat Signal up in the sky. It didn’t really work- your stomach flipped every night it was lit, especially since you could see it from your bedroom window as you laid in your bed, the city’s constant chorus of sirens lulling you to sleep.

Your face may have forgotten that night, but you still remembered it very clearly. It had been a key factor in convincing your boss to stop giving you such late shifts (a request that he honored until he fired yet another person and the shop was once again understaffed). But at least he knew that you weren’t just being paranoid, he had proof that your fears were substantiated. On the other hand, you also knew that your fears were substantiated which made walking around for the first few weeks after the attack a complicated affair.

But you were doing better. At least, you liked to think you were. You had plenty of other bad experiences in your life, at least four of them from the past year, what’s another one added to that list?

You took a sip of your drink, grimacing as the door swung open and yet another happily smiling couple walked in. Whether you were reacting to the taste of your drink (you tried something new, and you didn’t think you liked it) or the fact that it was once again not who you wanted to see walking through the door (you had gotten the time right, right? Oh god, what if you’ve just been misremembering it this entire time? How embarrassing would that be?)

You distracted yourself from the mental rabbit role of anxiety you were starting to go down by looking outside the window. No need to panic, just take some time to watch Gothamites doing their thing.

Sunny days, like the one you were observing from inside the cafe, were rare in Gotham. The streets were full of people- families, friends, couples- milling about, enjoying the nice weather, bundled up in jackets and scarves. It was almost pleasant to watch them, the normal law-abiding people, have a good day. A day without checking over their shoulder, a day of pretending that Gotham was just like every other city in the country. You watch them trying to convince themselves that today was the norm, not the exception.

You took another sip of your drink, holding back another grimace at its overly sweet taste as it slipped down your throat. You had tucked yourself away in a corner and yet you were still paranoid that every person who entered the cafe was silently judging you, even when they didn’t glance around the small space or take in their surroundings at all.

You didn’t dislike cafes, at least not in concept. You liked the idea of going to work in them, of spending your day in the warm, ambient space to write papers or read books. But when you did take the chance and went to a coffee shop, you would instead find yourself self conscious and feeling like… well, like a fraud. Like someone who was pretending to be organized and studious rather than actually being it.

But the cafe was a better place to meet with Dr. Crane than his office, like he had initially suggested. You wanted to avoid being enclosed in small spaces with him for as long as possible. It’s not because he made you uncomfortable, not at all. It’s because you don’t trust yourself to not completely mortify yourself when you’re alone with him. And that is what made you uncomfortable.

The door to the cafe swung open, letting in a new burst of cold air as Dr. Crane strode in, his eyes immediately finding yours in the corner. He doesn’t smile as he walks to you but his expression isn’t cold either. You find yourself smiling as he gets closer. How could you not, when you were meeting to discuss something he talked you into? Something that obviously meant he thought highly of you?

“Hi.” Your voice was embarrassingly soft as he sat down, and for a moment you thought he didn’t hear you. You shuffled your things around, putting the idle work you’d brought back in your bag, making space for him on the other side of the table.

“I hope your finals went well.”

“Yeah.” You’re a bit too proud that you’ve managed to not stutter on any of the single syllable words you’ve attempted so far. “How goes grading?”

“It is both the easiest and most tedious part of this job.” Dr. Crane had a penchant for using a short-answer essay format on his tests, which you’re sure must take forever to grade as thoroughly as he does. At least next semester he had you to dump all that unsavory work on.

“And your other job?” The one over at Arkham? He smiled at this. Though smirked, you thought, might have been more accurate.

“Interesting like always.”

He doesn’t elaborate, which you have come to mostly expect from him.

“Are you going to order anything?” You asked, gesturing with your chin to the counter, painfully aware that you were the one doing the brunt work of carrying the conversation.

“If you don’t mind.”

“Go ahead.”

As he left to order his drink, you pulled your folder of papers for the class back out of your bag, eager to get into the meat of your conversation. You wanted to know everything about your job as a teaching assistant, any minute detail that would satisfy the curiosity that had built over the prospect of doing something completely new to you.

A small sheet of questions was the only paper in the left pocket of the folder and you placed that neatly to the side.

Lastly, you pull out a well worn notepad, flipping past all the year-old notes from your History of Gotham class project last year, all the disjointed ramblings that came after. Finally you land on one of the final pages of the notebook, scrawling the date at the top of the page, following it with TA meeting w/ Dr. Crane.

You didn’t necessarily like using this notebook, didn’t like seeing how the notes from your project changed from disinterested bullet points on local politics to paragraphs of observations and notes on the way the election was slowly dissolving because of one man. As it was happening it had been fascinating to watch in real time. After all, justice- true justice- was nice to see, especially in Gotham. But something must have fallen apart on the night of the election, at Gotham Square Garden. You’d seen hints of it when that car ran through the mayor’s funeral but seeing the absolutely careless disregard for human life as a whole- You stop yourself before you get lost in your thoughts, grounding yourself by pinching your thigh.

All of that to say that somehow, this was the only notebook you could find on short notice in your apartment, sitting out on your catch-all-dining-table like you’d just been using it. Had it been weird? Yes. But it was whatever, you only needed it for this meeting and then you could transfer the notes over to your laptop or a fresh, new notebook.

Dr. Crane returns with his drink, sliding back into his seat while placing it on the table.

“Welcome back.” You smiled as if you hadn’t just pulled yourself into and out of an anxiety attack. “If it’s alright, I have some questions about the job before we start- just some things I want clarified so I can know exactly what the expectations- your expectations- for me are.”

He nodded, allowing you to speak.

“So, my responsibilities are to just help in grading papers, take notes during class, and offer assistance to the students if they need it, right?”

“Correct.” He took a sip of his drink- coffee, you could tell by the smell wafting towards you. “As you know, I don’t use TAs often, if ever. I don’t need them. But I intend on taking full advantage of your being here.”

“And what does taking full advantage entail?” You’re scribbling a note on your notepad when you realized how the vague question could come across- the innuendo you’d only realized was present once you said it out loud. You look up at him, eyes wide. “What I meant to say was-”

“I know what you meant.” You can’t break your eye contact with him, but it’s too much and you need to sever this connection between the two of you before you say or do something that would be incredibly regrettable-

Luckily, he does the hard part for you and looks up at nothing in particular, in the mindless way people trying to remember something do. But it still strikes you as odd because you don’t think you’ve ever seen this man do anything mindlessly.

“This is an opportunity for feedback from someone who doesn’t need to worry about failing for giving me an honest opinion.”

You chuckled even though you knew he was being completely serious.

“You don’t read the student surveys at the end of the semester?” The school sent student surveys out to everyone at the end of the semester and were persistent in reminding you to fill them out. Like, email-every-day persistent reminding you that you only had a few more days left to complete them!

“I don’t trust half of the people who take my classes to give actual feedback that isn’t affected by what grade they ended up receiving.” The unspoken implication, then, was that he did trust you.

You were practically vibrating at the thought.

“Alright. I’ll try my best to be honest with you.”

“Good.”

“Great.” He smiled at you from over the rim of his glass, you could tell from the way his eyes narrowed. You finally broke away from his eyes to look at your drink, frowning when you realized you barely made a dent in it. What a waste.

The chatter of the cafe was getting louder with each passing second that neither of you spoke, the white noise filling the empty space between you.

You should say something. (But what? You have no idea what the limits of your strictly professional relationship with Dr. Crane are- what can you talk about, or is small talk even allowed?)

“I would like to ask you a question.” Dr. Crane easily breaks the silence between you, like he could see how you were freaking out inside and decided to put you out of your misery, allowing the cafe noise to go back to the background.

“Okay.” It’s so easy to agree with him. So much harder, as you have found, to disagree with him or refuse him.

He leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table. He was dressed as he usually was- a professional suit and tie, rimless glasses perched on his nose. His hair was slightly mussed, like he didn’t style it but instead ran his fingers through it a few times before deciding it was presentable.

“What do you want to do after you graduate?”

The question was not what you were expecting but it didn’t surprise you. At the point you were at in your college career, everyone wanted to know what your next steps were, what you had planned for your life post-graduation. Including you.

You shrugged. “I honestly don’t know. I’d like to write, maybe do research. Or work at a museum, in the archives. Gotham could use some clean-up in that regard- we should make public records more accessible to the public. It’s harder to hide corruption that way.”

“An admirable goal.”

“An informed one.” You shrugged. “We hide all of our documents behind layers and layers of red tape that even as a student who studies it, it’s incredibly hard to obtain access for any of the work I do.” You paused, taking a moment to think about the rant you had bubbling up inside you. It was a good goal, sure, but even as you described it, it didn’t feel right for you. “Buuut I’m not even sure I want to do that. The idea of spending my career entrenched in Gotham’s bureaucracy is… frankly exhausting, and I’m only thinking about it right now. I can’t imagine actually doing it for a living.”

You stopped, suddenly uncomfortable after speaking for the longest you ever have with him. And it was about Gotham’s archival system.

But from the look on his face- which you could pretty positively identify as ‘not bored’- he didn’t mind at all.

“From the writing you’ve turned in to me, I think you would do well in research, maybe writing papers. ”

Research papers? Sure, you enjoyed writing them when they were on fun topics, but if you were going to write, you wanted it to be something you’d find in a bookshop, not on J-STOR.

Still, you preened at the compliment.

“You think?”

“You have a good research voice.”

“Thank you.” It takes every ounce of willpower to not begin rambling about how you developed your writing style or why you write the way you do. That would be a surefire way to kill the moment, and you wanted to keep this moment going for as long as possible- forever, if you could. You wanted to ask him to keep lavishing praise upon you, like you’ve been deprived of it (and now that you thought of it, maybe you had been). They weren’t even in-depth compliments and yet you craved more like a drophead craved another dose.

“And where do you work right now?” You deflated with the change in subject. But, just like the one from before, it’s not an unexpected question. A good icebreaker, though awkward since you can’t return the question to him. Most of the conversations with him, you realized, would be one-sided like this. Him trying to learn more about you and you already knowing what his answer to the question would be if you asked it back to him.

“...A convenience store.” It shouldn’t be embarrassing to tell him, everybody works shitty jobs at least a few times in their life but especially during college. Still, going from discussing your strengths to admitting you worked in a job that utilized none of them was just a bit humiliating. “The job market in Gotham isn’t very accommodating to full-time college students.”

He nodded, his only response another sip of his coffee. But you could tell he was thinking, some fragment of an idea turning the cogs inside his brain.

“I’ll see what I can do.”

He’ll see what he can do? What does that- oh.

For a second, you were simply surprised at his suggestion. Then you were desperate to convince him that, no, you didn’t need help in the job market, that he’d already done enough to help you with giving you the TA position, blah blah blah. Any reason you could come up with to get him to not see you as a down-on-her-luck-desperate-for-any-out-she-can-get girl but rather a professional-and-resourceful-young-college-aged-woman-who-is-making-do-with-her-life-situation-and-doesn’t-need-any-help-otherwise.

Your heart rate has spiked, thudding in your chest as if it was trying to burst through your skin.

“What? No!” You were sputtered as you tried to figure out the correct way to word everything you just felt in the few seconds it took to process the intent behind his words. “I’m not asking for help, Dr. Crane- I don’t want help. A shitty job is shitty, but it’s not the end of the world. I have plenty of time in my life to work jobs that will actually need something aside from good customer service skills.”

At the last second you remembered to smile.

For a moment all he did was make a low sound like a hum, the kind of sound someone makes when they’re contemplating something and all you could think about was that you were afraid you had messed something up between you.

“Well, the offer stands.” They should have been comforting, his placating words. But it was his tone, the way a secret meaning hid behind everything he said, that sent a shiver down your spine and not necessarily in the way you enjoyed. For the first time you understood what everyone else meant when they said they were afraid of Dr. Crane. That though he wasn’t physically intimidating there was something about his aura that set off alarm bells in other student’s heads.

“You’ve already helped me enough with this position.” If you thought your heart was beating fast before, it’s nothing compared to the rapid flutter in your breast, so fast you’re afraid it’s going to shut itself down. So you say the only other thing you can think of that might solve the problem but of course it comes out wrong. “I don’t need anything else from you.”

It was supposed to be a kind refusal of his offer to help, reassuring him that you weren’t a needy child but a grown adult woman who could handle her own problems, one who didn’t need help from her fucking psychology professor. But it came out like you were offended that he was the one asking and now he looked like he’d just swallowed something that had offended his palette and the taste was lingering for longer than he expected.

“Right-” Oh, how you hated the coldness in his voice, “-you do get a bi-weekly stipend. It’s not much.”

And you remembered why you hated refusing him so much. The distant way he spoke, how his eyes suddenly seemed to look anywhere but at you.

You nodded, staring down at your notepad, cursing the tiny pricks of tears hiding behind your eyes. Was it just your silly little crush that had you regretting every time you pushed back against him, every time you tried to make a decision that kept him from becoming an even bigger part of your life than he, admittedly, was already becoming?

Grabbing your bag and shoving everything from your side of the table into it, you stood, ready to make your escape. You’d discussed everything you’d needed to, right? You were free to leave, it doesn’t matter if it was sudden. He couldn’t keep you here, not in a public cafe, not against your will.

“I think I need to… go… um, my fish…” Any excuse to leave a conversation suddenly had left your brain the moment you stood up (you don’t have a fish). All you could see was him, suddenly looking at you not like he was affronted by you anymore but like he was simply confused (or perhaps, intrigued?). He raised his eyebrows, an unreadable emotion flickering over his blank face.

“Sit back down.”

His voice wasn’t aggressive. Instead it was soft, soft enough that you doubted anyone else in the cafe heard anything. But you did, your ears now hardwired to hone in on what he was saying at all times. You obeyed silently, embarrassment heating your face as you stared at your hands, resting in your lap and twitching from the adrenaline still coursing through your veins.

But which part was more embarrassing: you trying to leave so haphazardly, or the fact that he was definitely psychoanalyzing you right now, adding more tiny facts to his mental profile on you (if he had one at all, if he cared enough about you to bother taking mental notes on your behavior).

“I’m sorry.” Like his, your voice was quiet. But yours held none of the soft control his voice had, instead coming out meek and submissive. You force yourself to look up from your lap and into his eyes, knowing damn well what they did to you.

“Don’t be.” He took a sip of his coffee, maintaining eye contact the entire time. “I’m sorry if I came across as overbearing.” He offers no more explanation for his sudden suggestion, for his sudden insistence to play a larger role in your life.

Once upon a time, you’d read an article on some Buzzfeed knock-off site about what you shouldn’t say during an apology. A whole half of the article was spent discussing what you should avoid responding to an apology with. The article suggested opting for I forgive you or I appreciate your apology. Something that made it clear that you expected to not be treated the same way in the future, that you wanted a change in behavior. Do not, it said, reply with something that removes any guilt from the offending party because then they’ll see it as a cue that their behavior was acceptable.

But even with this knowledge locked away somewhere in your brain, the two poisonous words crossed your lips anyway.

“It’s okay.”

****

Your winter break flies by, your days spent either working shifts huddled by a space heater behind the store’s counter or taking notes on the assigned readings for Dr. Crane’s class, your desire to be overly prepared for the semester motivating you through every densely worded paragraph. You were bound and determined to impress him, to try and make up for the awful impression you must have made during your meeting in the cafe.

And, also, a tiny little part of you wanted to be something he thought about after he left the classroom, to be someone who didn’t just exist when you were directly interacting with him.

Was it wrong to want to be such a big part of your professor’s life?

The thought crossed your mind one day as you cleaned the bathroom of the corner store, spray bottle and rag in hand. Luckily it was an employee-only bathroom so it was a fraction of its potential grossness. But you were still glad to distract yourself from your task, sitting back on your haunches and frowning at your thoughts.

It’s not like you were manipulating him. And even though, yes, you were attracted to him, it didn’t mean that the things you were doing were so he’d see you in that way. If you wanted to do that, you would’ve worn sexier outfits to class not… leggings and a T-shirt that’s a couple sizes too big.

No, you just wanted him to remember you once you were out of his life. You liked the idea of one day being a story told to other classes, being heralded as Dr. Crane’s perfect student or his model TA. The one who did everything right and was rewarded for her hard work. No part of this had anything to do with your unrequited desire for the man.

With that settled in your mind, you turned back to the toilet, sighing as you grabbed the brush.

Then you blinked and suddenly, you were waking up on the first day of class, almost tripping over yourself and the giant stack of psychology books to get ready for the day. Or at least, it felt like that with how quickly the last two weeks of your winter break flew by. Your dedication to your routine only served to bleed the days together into one long study session.

You’d spent too much time the night before mulling over which outfit to wear for your first day as a TA. It must have taken an hour before you finally settled on a simple yet effective outfit that you didn’t get the chance to wear too often. It was professional yet still had some youthful energy, the kind of thing you might wear to interview for a work-study job.

You stared at yourself in the mirror, fussing over your hair. Realistically, no one would be looking at you for more than a few seconds but you still felt the need to look good for this. Partially because you felt the need to prove that you were where you were supposed to be- that it hadn’t been a fluke that you’d been given this position. And then, partially because you wanted Dr. Crane to see you and see that you were trying, even if it was in the smallest way.

A quick spritz of perfume and one glance in the mirror to frown at your face later you’re stepping into your nice yet practical shoes, grabbing your bookbag and phone, and heading out the door.

It’s not raining, but the sky is heavy with clouds. You have an emergency poncho in your bookbag just in case, still in its original packaging because you’d rather arrive home soaked than wear it, but luckily the forecast says the rain will hold off until your classes are over.

Your thoughts kept your mind occupied as you walked through the city, so much so that soon you looked up and saw you were at the same building you’d had Abnormal Psychology in last semester.

You climbed up the steps into the familiar building, sighing as you pushed open the door into the entry-stairwell. With a glance down at your phone, you saw that you were still thirty-five minutes early. You decide to spend the extra time climbing the multiple flights of stairs to the fourth floor. It’ll be good for you. Better for you to be moving than restlessly sitting in an empty classroom with nothing to do.

But climbing up the stairs only took a few minutes, even with you deliberately slowing yourself down. Soon enough, you were propping the door open and flicking on the lights of the empty classroom. Of course, you’re the first one in the classroom. With what you knew about Dr. Crane, he wouldn’t arrive until at least five minutes before the class began but you can never bring yourself to be so painstakingly punctual. Being early is much easier than being on time.

You pulled a desk from the front row and placed it perpendicularly to the podium against the wall, that way you were still able to observe the class and the lecture, while also differentiating yourself enough from the others that the students knew you were the assistant. You shrug your backpack into the chair, taking a moment to get your desk ready for class. Your notebook, some pens, the stack of syllabi Dr. Crane had asked you to bring were resting neatly on the desk.

You wouldn’t be able to set up the powerpoint for Dr. Crane, not having the access password for the projection system or the presentation itself. Maybe you could talk with him about getting that later, your strong desire to prove yourself the best TA ever leaving you eager to pile on more responsibilities to your workload.

Finally, once it seemed like you had been waiting an eternity in an empty classroom (but it was at most fifteen minutes), the first student wandered in. Oh god. Were you supposed to talk to them? What exactly was your relationship supposed to be with them- were you closer to an elevated student or to a miniature professor? What the hell was your job, again? Why didn’t you write this down somewhere you’d see it today?

The rest of the twenty-five students trailed in throughout your entire freakout, which only ended when Dr. Crane himself strode into the room, predictably five minutes before the start time.

He walked like somebody who had to learn how to be confident at some point in their life, like someone who wasn’t born sure-footed or with perfect posture. Which was honestly more intimidating than someone who had been confident since they learned to walk, because that meant he knew what it was like at the bottom of the food chain.

And you could tell from the way he carried himself now that he would never allow anyone to ever bring him back down to that level.

You watched him as he made his way toward you, the tiniest quirk of his lip betraying that he was pleased to see you. You quietly reveled in his pleasure, warmth curling in your stomach as you waited for him to approach you.

“Please hand out the syllabi.” He said, his voice quiet. Clearly only meant for you. You nodded, practically falling out of your chair as you scrambled to do what he requested as quickly as possible. The last time you spoke with him in person was that disastrous meeting at the cafe. After that, you’d only sent a few emails back and forth over the break to clarify small details and for him to send you the syllabus and lecture notes. The emails themselves were professional and distant, though you’re always relieved that he isn’t the type of professor to send you emails with the “Sent from my iPhone” tag still at the bottom.

Jonathan Crane took himself seriously. He expected others to do the same.

You passed the syllabus out, doing your best to avoid any eye contact with the students. You had made the decision while you waited for everyone to show up that you weren’t here to develop a relationship with them and you certainly didn’t mind coming off as cold if it helped to achieve this. Taking a metaphorical leaf out of Dr. Crane’s book.

But you’re not sure as you passed the papers out if you came off as cold and someone who should be respected or awkward and someone who’s completely out of her depth.

When you returned back to your seat, Dr. Crane had already pulled up the presentation for the day. Having been in a few classes with him before, you knew that he did the customary Syllabus Day, if just because he knew 75% of students weren’t prepared for actual learning on the first day. As if to prove that point, only three of the students even had out a notebook and pen, and only a few more were actually looking through the syllabus.

However, Dr. Crane giving students a lax first day didn’t mean he was also planning on easing the class into the course material. When you’d looked over the syllabus before class, you’d noted that there was a short writing assignment due on Wednesday already. And a book discussion on Monday (the book itself being 300 pages long and currently sitting on your couch).

As he started the class, you split your attention between watching him work and observing the class. And, of course, scribbling notes in the margins of your already overcrowded syllabus.

When you looked over the class, you tried to guess who would drop out when they got home that night. Which students thought this would be just an easy-A type of class (a class that would spend every class talking about a different phobia, or maybe just glorified therapy) and not the overly in-depth look on the function that fear and anxiety held throughout history and in the modern world. This was, you knew, Dr. Crane’s pet subject, the area of study he truly cared about. And hearing him talk about it, even just about the syllabus, confirmed this.

Where he was certainly interested during your Abnormal Psychology class last semester (less so in your Intro to Psych class that he must have somehow been roped into teaching), here he was passionate and more animated than you think you had ever seen him when teaching. Which wasn’t much, but it was still fascinating to watch. You were so used to his stoicism that seeing him in his element was… enthralling. Captivating.

You could watch him do this for days, no food or water needed to sustain you.

“If you looked carefully at your syllabus,” you could tell the class knew he was wrapping up by the way one or two of them have already zipped up their bags, waiting for the moment in every lecture where it's clear you’re dismissed, “you’ll see that there is a short writing assignment due on Wednesday. It’ll be graded by my TA-” He gestured over to you and your head snapped from where you were glaring at one of the students who had already put his stuff away to stare at Dr. Crane as he introduced you to the class, “-and don’t think she’ll go easy on you. She knows my standards.”

Hesitantly, you waved to the class, unsure of what else you’re supposed to do now that everyone was staring at you.

“You can find more information about the assignment in the syllabus, but if you have any questions email her. She’s… fully capable.”

Fuck. How the hell were you supposed to react to that?

“Alright. You’re dismissed.” He turned away from the class, who seemed to take a moment to realize they’d been released. With their eyes finally off of you as they pack up, you take a moment to let go of the breath you’d been holding since he’d acknowledged you in front of the class.

You watched them all leave, only one girl coming up to introduce herself to Dr. Crane. You pretended to look through your syllabus as he gave her a polite smile and not much else, resisting the urge to smile to yourself.

He never did that to you, not that you could remember. Not that you were the type to go introduce yourself to your professors, but even when you did stick behind to talk to him he seemed interested in what you were saying. No polite smiles (but no genuine ones, either) just his magnetized eye contact and conversation that said I’m listening to you.

She turned and left the classroom, not sparing you a second glance. The second the door closed you couldn’t help the laugh that bubbled out of your mouth.

“That was weird, right?”

“How so?” That same ghost of a smile was gracing his lips, a fragment of mirth in his expression. “She’s a freshman, probably heard somewhere that it’s good to introduce yourself to your professors on the first day.”

“I think those pieces of advice also include the TA.” You began putting your things away. “I didn’t hallucinate you saying I was grading that assignment, right?”

“Are you prone to hallucinations?” His voice was closer now and you startled, looking up to see him standing only a few feet away. He had moved so quietly, a cat stalking towards its prey.

“...Not at all.” You whispered, ignoring that you were lying a little. That you were deliberately excluding the few times you had seen the Riddler standing in a crowd only for him to (obviously) not be there. That was something you could never admit to anyone, especially not to Dr. Crane.

For a moment, he looked like he was debating what to say. Then it was gone, and he backed away from you again.

“Thank you, I’ll see you on Wednesday.”

But as you left, you couldn’t shake the feeling that he wanted to say something else.

*** Tuesday was one of the few days in your week where you had absolutely no interactions with Dr. Crane. No classes, no office hours, no meetings. It was a weird realization to figure out that in your mind you viewed it as a cheat day, a day where your work didn’t matter even though your classes were all for your actual degree.

Your phone started buzzing in your pocket as you were walking back home from your class on the History of Intelligence and Surveillance and you had to fumble with your bag and the books you still had in your hands to pull it out.

You couldn’t help the groan that escaped your mouth when you saw the caller identified as Mom (heart emoji).

“Fucking hell.” You murmured before you swiped to answer the call. “Hey mom!” Your voice sounded so fake, too cheerful in your own ears. You wonder if she can see through it as easily as you can.

“Hey, I was just calling to see how you were doing.”

“I’m fine, you know how it is.” You stopped to shove your books in your bag, throwing it back on before beginning to walk again. You winced when you realized how she would take that answer, how she always took any response to that inquiry.

“Are you still seeing Dr. Hill?”

“I’ve already told you, no.” You braced yourself, preparing yourself for whatever good-natured advice she was about to give. It was the well-meaning comments that hurt the most. The comments that made your heart ache from how much she cared about you but how little she actually understood.

“You really should see him still. Especially with what you went through last year-”

“I had anxiety before that happened.” You interrupted, so tired of explaining this exact same thing to her, to your therapist, to everyone who knew anything about the state of your mental health. “Plenty of people were there that night, I’m not the only one.”

“That doesn’t change the fact that you were affected. I know how you are.” She fell silent and you couldn’t think of any response. Because yeah, you were affected by being a witness to a terrorist attack. You were affected by the knowledge that the man who claimed to want to clean Gotham had intended for you- and everyone in Gotham Square Garden that night- to die.

It would be a miracle if you hadn’t come out of that night unaffected.

“How’s dad?” Not your smoothest transition. But your conversations with your mom were always filled with them.

“He misses you.”

“I miss you guys too.” You were being genuine there. You knew what your response would lead to, yet you said it anyway because it was correct- it was the honest thing to say.

“Come back. I don’t know why you insist on staying in that godforsaken city.”

Honestly, you didn’t know either. You had been born in the city, had lived there until you were twelve before your parents had enough of the city and took you away, moving two hours away to a rural suburb. Quiet enough to be quaint, big enough to not feel abandoned. But somehow, for some reason, you had been called back to the city. It had a siren song, drawing anyone near closer and closer until they were trapped, unable to leave.

Like it or not, Gotham was your home.

“I’m not leaving, mom. But, um, my classes are going well!” Another clunky transition, but it seemed to work if her deep sigh was anything to go by. She had given up on trying to convince you to move home (for now). Besides, it was good to remind her that you were in the city for a good reason (for now). “TA-ing is interesting. A different experience, it’ll look good on my resume.”

“What was the class, again?” You heard her pour raw noodles into boiling water, the hiss of steam rising toward her phone’s microphone.

“It’s a special topics class. On the psychology of fear.”

“Psychology? Aren’t you a history maj- did you change your major and not tell us?” The sound of a spoon being put down quickly. She sounded hurt, and you know it's not because she thinks you changed your major. It’s the idea that you hypothetically wouldn’t have told her that makes her voice go soft and you can imagine the way her eyebrows must crinkle towards each other as she wonders what happened to her daughter, where did she go?

As much as you may dislike these conversations with her, you didn’t want to put her through that, not after everything else she’s been through with you living in Gotham. Not after everything she’s been through in the past year alone.

“No! No, I’m still studying history but I’ve added psych as a minor so… it’s all figured out.” You trailed off, not sure what you had meant to say there at the end, wondering what she really thought about it all. What would she tell your dad when you hung up, if she suspected something weird was going on. (Was something weird going on between you and Dr. Crane? Or were you just paranoid and horny and craving that all consuming intimacy that you hadn’t felt in a very long time if ever?) “Um, I’m almost back at my apartment so I’m gonna hang up now, if that’s alright.”

“Oh. Okay. We love you.” You could hear the hidden plea in her words. Come back home.

“I love you, too.”

Your phone went silent. You looked down at the terminated call screen before it faded back to your normal lock screen picture, frowning before putting your phone back in your pocket. You weren’t actually close to your apartment at all, but you’d grown tired of the conversation. It was always the same one.

Before last year, they’d only bring your coming home up every few conversations. But it seemed like every single conversation’s true meaning now was to convince you to return to them, to leave Gotham. That, and going back to therapy.

Therapy that you had attended, originally. But your therapist never seemed to understand what you meant when you spoke or that your problems didn’t start after the Riddler did his whole ‘attempting-to-destroy-Gotham’ thing, it just didn’t help. But you couldn’t articulate the things you wanted to to him and then he tried to give you little coping strategies that seemed to work fine for everyone else but never for you. So you stopped scheduling appointments, instead overloading your course load with psychology classes that you didn’t need for your degree. (But hey, now you had a psych minor.) Maybe if you took enough of them you could figure out what was off in your brain and fix it yourself.

It was wishful thinking but it was the best you could do. At least it made you feel like you were doing something other than practice breathing exercises.

The rest of your walk home was bitter, and not just because of the cold nipping at your nose and fingers.

The next day, the second day of Dr. Crane’s class, was the first real day of the semester that wasn’t just about course expectations. You got to the classroom at the same time as Monday, and there were the same amount of students in the classroom as there were on the first day (zero).

You pulled out your desk and threw your bag down, unzipping and pulling out your notebook and pen. You flipped to where you’d tucked the syllabus, looking over the part where Dr. Crane had written about the writing assignment. That was something you hadn’t read very carefully the first few times you’d gone over the syllabus, having not cared too much about it since you yourself wouldn’t be doing it. But now that you were going to be collecting it to grade, you wanted to know the exact parameters he had set up for the assignment.

…using the reading, analyze a moment in your life where you exhibited a fear response. Be thorough and descriptive when writing. This is an assignment to have you understand basic fear responses in addition to introducing you to how the writing assignments in this class will be assessed. Minimum 350 words. 5%

And even though you didn’t have to submit your own writing, you still thought about what you would have written. What else were you going to do while waiting for students to arrive?

The most obvious example, the one that comes to your mind first is, of course, the one that you wouldn’t use in a school assignment. The one that you would rather die than to write about to be assessed for a mere 5% of your final grade.

But you have plenty of other moments where you’ve been afraid. After all, you live in one of the most dangerous cities in the country. Everyone has felt fear here, even if they live a relatively safe life. Hell, you could just write about when you’d been mugged (and conveniently leave out who saved the day because the idea of writing that down was also a bit humiliating; it was so unrealistic even though it happened).

You’re distracted from your thoughts by the sound of someone sitting down, the telltale sound of a chair scratching against the tiled floor and a bag softly hitting the floor reaching you. You looked up from the syllabus, noting that the girl who arrived first was the same girl who stayed behind to introduce herself to Dr. Crane the class before.

You stared at her for a moment before clearing your throat quietly before taking the leap and breaking the silence.

“Hey, you can bring me your writing assignment.” Her head snapped up to look at you, her eyes wide, a flush creeping up her cheeks. You immediately felt guilty, both about scaring her just then and what you’d said about her last class. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you.” Hey, she could’ve written her paper on that just then if it wasn’t due already.

“It’s alright.” She slipped out of her desk, a single printed paper in her hands. You took it with a smile, which only fell when she turned to go back to her seat and you looked down at the paper, doing your best not to start reading.

It hit you then that you were going to be reading these people’s personal experiences, some of which might be traumatic because not everyone has your aversion to sharing the bloody details of their past for a school assignment.

You repeated this interaction with every student who entered the classroom, your discomfort growing each time you told one of them to give you their assignment before adding it to the tiny pile.

Just like Monday, Dr. Crane entered five minutes before class started, striding through the rows of desks to get to the front. He looked over at you, eyes flickering down to the pile of papers you’d collected. He turned to the class, gesturing to you.

“If you haven’t, please hand in your assign-”

“I got them all, already.” You wouldn’t normally interrupt him but you were proud of yourself for managing to do something before he asked it of you. It was a small thing but it felt good.

He stared at you for a moment, his lips parted slightly, before turning back to the class. “Never mind, then.”

With that, he set up the presentation and began class.

part II

#stbotdi #jonathan crane x reader #jonathan crane #batman x reader #batman fanfiction #bruce wayne x reader #my writing #my fic

[ollie-lolly]

Against our lord and savior

Media: Genshin Impact

Warnings: SMUT (minors under 18 plz don't interact)

Date: the project started 11 december 2022

Finished on: 23 of december 2022

Type: oneshot

Concept: When Thoma had an absurd idea of doing it in the worst room at the estate, the risk sure was high but not high enough…right?

This fic contains:

Smut with plot, overstim+crying, established relationship (Thoma and the reader), voyeurism (Ayato), hand kink, ,improper use of the word “lord”, handjob, cleaning gone wrong, spanking, mild degrading, ear biting, light temperature play(hot), aftercare, controlled orgasm and getting tied up

Relationship: Thoma x reader x Ayato

Characters:

gender neutral! readerxSWITCH! SWITCH!Thoma x DOM Ayato

Note:

This is my first proper fic. So please give constructive feedback! :D. I have not played Genshin much, so I am sorry if certain things are inaccurate. I would like to thank my friends for encouraging me to write this story. <3 This is the first thing i ever posted on tumblr so i am sorry if i am a hot mess. Plz let me know if i did somthing wrong.

Word count:2,700~

It has been a while since you and Thoma have established your relationship. You are bursting with curiosity: to know what things make him tick. Sure, he might seem picture perfect on the outside: with all the sweet things he does for others, paired with a beautiful smile to match! It was so convincing that you thought it was his true self! Lets just say as time went on he started to show a fraction of his true colors. So to know him more than just the sweetest fixer in Inazuma was your mission. You knew that was not going to be easy. Why, you ask? Well it is because of the (recent) constant watch of your lovely lord Ayato. It was already hard to keep your desires for each other a secret but in the last week it seems that Ayato needs Thoma’s help 24/7. Every Time your sweet boyfriend would get a heart attack from Ayato calling him the moment your gaze lingered on eachothers eyes. In fear of getting discovered. Afterall Ayato is a man who would most likely not enjoy the fact that his loyal servants bang on the formal estate grounds.

After a hard working day Ayato had an important message. The Kamisato sidlings had to go away for a week. Since there has been a growing issue in a nearby area. Ayato wanted to be like his father. Always there to protect and care for his people. His original plan was for him to be beside Ayaka the entire time during their visit, but Ayaka stated that she at least wanted to try to handle the problem herself seeing it as stretching her horizons. So they made a compromise. Ayato would assist if needed and if he felt at any point she could handle it herself he would return to the estate. They have been so gracious in being transparent with the situation, a sign of great Kamisato leaders. Ayato and you had a weird relationship. At first it did not seem like he trusted you. After a certain dinner with your blue haired lord. The trust grew as he put an important secret on your shoulders.  You helped Ayato get ready for his trip. 

As you were folding his clothes. He entered his room. You quickly bowed upon catching the sight of his presence. “Greetings (name), I have come to speak with you. ” You quickly straighten yourself. “(Name) I am sure you have recognised that it has been a while since I have left my estate. Could you reckon why that is?” He spoke. You thought long and hard staring at the ceiling as if the answer was written on his beautiful paper lamp that hung above the two of you. He followed your gaze briefly admiring the great craftsmanship of the lamp. You broke the silence “I am sorry my lord i could not form a fitting reason behind your lack of absence.” And there it was. His familiar smile. The tension in the room shifted; it felt comfortable like the infamous dinner the two of you shared. “The motive is that now I feel like I can trust someone to a similar amount as I do to my loyal Thoma.” You return a smile of your own. “That's great to hear my lord”. 

He stared into your eyes “That is why I have made my decision in leaving Thoma and you of taking care of my beloved estate for me”. He took a brief pause, as you felt the tension in the room shift once more. His eyes darkened. “See this as a trial of sorts (name).” Ayato advanced closer into your space. And like a whisper in the wind he spoke. “After all it's not like you would do anything devious, would you?”. You felt a shiver run down your spine. You were about to say “Of course not my-”.  “Oh, am I interrupting something?”. You felt a wave of relief as you spotted your green eyed love standing with a flushed face in the doorway. “Ah Thoma, I am glad you are here,” Ayato stated. “(name) do you mind?” You quickly gave permission. Ayato turned to Thoma “Here” you saw Ayato grabbing something from his Marry Poppins-esque sleeve. “I have just told (name) here that you two will be administering the estate in my absence. Thoma spoke, “Of course my lord, I will promise that the estate will be in peak condition before your return.” Ayato smiled “Of course”. 

When the Kamisato duo left, Thoma learned a lot. He mastered the art to manage the estate to perfection.  Thoma felt so much more at ease when showing affection since the absence of the leader of the Yashiro commission's watchful eye.  The whole day your gaze lingered on his frame. The hard work evident by the sweat and blood flowing through and across his body. Your eyes often shift on his lightly calloused hands. Which had an endearing softness to them. You often imagine how his hands would make you cream and scream, while he kissed you softly. You were definitely not the only one with impure thoughts. After all his eyes were (respectfully) undressing you every chance he got. The sexual tension was clear as day.

You two had only one task before the arrival: to clean the young lord's room. You were struggling with the soft silk sheets of Ayato's bed. “Need help with that, my love?” You suddenly felt him press his body on your back. A soft warm hand traced the inside of your thighs. Most likely warmed up by the use of his vision. God, he knew how to make you weak in the knees. You let out a soft whimper. Thoma put his hand delicately over your eyes “I wish to ravish you my love~”. You couldn't hold in a sharp inhale. “My deepest and darkest fantasy is to mark you here as mine. I want to leave our lord's room in a mess of our loving release”  He uttered the words with laced arousal yet with such love and kindness. He wandered close to your clothed sex, swirling his fingers around your growing desire. You had to hold back from letting out a moan. Your mouth unconsciously opened. Thoma gently licked the growing trail of saliva that dripped from your mouth. Thoma tasted a lingering sweetness from the strawberries you shared the same day. He was really testing your limits.  

He softly twirled you around and turned himself towards the bed. While finally fixing the sheets, you went to the door checking if there was anyone there. “Huh i guess Ayato will stay with Ayaka after all” you thought to yourself. “Hey look at that!”. You saw Thoma’s hand pointing at the sky. “What are you talking ab- AH! '' he suddenly picked you up, and softly placed you on the bed.  “I can understand that this is quite the risk” Thoma hovered above you. “May I make love to you?”. You paused and thought to yourself, “What if Ayato is back early? God, what if I will lose my residence here as a result?”. Fuck it. You looked Thoma in the eye. 

“Please make love to me”. That was all the permission that Thoma needed. He started softly kissing you while his hands slowly undressed you. When he went to kiss your neck you went and undressed him in return. Sometimes a moan would slip the more he would suck on the sensitive skin. He pressed his warm hand on your naked sex and nibbled on your ear. Your sex throbbing in response. Thoma slowly kissed and left bite marks on your body while he played with your sex. He slid his fingers up and down reveling in the fact you were so horny for him already. He lowered himself and started gently licking your thighs. 

Your body was gently flipped over “May I put it in?”. He came closer to your nape “please” , his warm breath fanned across your back. You desperately gave him permission. He teased your entrance with his hard leaking cock. Already aroused from the fact you were doing it on the bed of the very lord he would trust his life too. He slowly slid it in. He whimpered at the feeling of your gummy walls wrapping around him.

He started slow but hard. “Thoma, could you go a bit faster please?” “Of course, anything for you”. He said with so much love in his words. He started to quicken his pace “Is that better sweetheart?”. You moaned loudly at the feeling of Thoma roughly rearranging your insides. “I see that as a yes ah- fuck~”.  Thoma and you were left a moaning mess. Thoma quickly found your sweet spot. Which quickly made your climax slowly arrived for the both of you.

Thoma’s movements were suddenly brought to a halt. As soon as you wanted to ask what happened you looked up. “Fuck”. Ayato's form stood in the doorway. His smile was a clear hint that he did not just start seeing the scene a moment ago. “How dare the two of you do such indecent things within my private chambers.” Ayato said condescendingly. Your face left in a shocked state

 “Well, do you want to feel your punishment now?”

“I’m sorry my lord!~” you yelled, Thoma moaned in your body’s reaction. You gave him a delicious squeeze around him. As he let out a loud moan. Your eyes rolled back at the feeling of Thomas' pulsating cock. The embarrassment mixed with pleasure made your heartbeat increase ten fold. “How dare my cute little servant be so desperate?” He calmly walked behind Thoma who was still left in shock by the sudden entrance of Ayato. The lord ripped Thoma off of you which left you a pathetic whining mess. At the feeling of emptiness.

“Last warning, are you sure that this is the way you want to deal with your punishment?” 

Thoma looked at you with pleading eyes. He planned this didn't he? Ayato and you really did share a possession in his heart. “Yes sir”.

“Calm down now my sweet loyal pet.” He tilted your sweaty face towards him by your neck. “I just want to teach the two of you a lesson” I want you to beg for your release. I know your desire, my little servant ”. He pressed Thoma’ back onto the bed as his gloved hand hit the back of Thoma harshly. Thoma counting every slap. Wait, has he done this before?

“I and as for you” Ayato suddenly turned to you.  He lowered himself under the bed and grabbed blue colored cuffs. proceeding to dangle them before your eyes. “This will be merely the fraction of your punishment servant”. “Since it is your first time with me i'll be gentle..well as gentle as i can.”

He shoved your arms to the back of you and clicked the cuffs in place. Keeping eye contact as he did so. Quickly feeling the cold metal dig into your skin. Ayato started placing Thoma in front of you forcing you to look at eachother. He undressed himself. Ayato started pumping Thoma’s cock from his back. The other gloved hand went to grab the back of Thoma’s hair roughly. 

Thoma felt sorry yet, how you looked chuffed up. Was a beautiful sight he had never seen before. It made him feel things he never had before.

Right as he was about to cum. Ayato penetrated him. Pushing his face to your aroused sex. “Help them out peasant” Thoma  pleasured you with his mouth. His hands on the headboard so as to not crash into your sex. His moans vibrated your sex. You let out a moan looking up to see that Ayato was already looking right at you. Greeting you with a slightly cocky smile. Ayato suddenly sped up while keeping direct eye contact. The blonde came quickly, the flow of your sour taste motivating him to continue. Ayato grunted. Your vision began to blur. Ayato and your climax arrived at the same time. “Good job Thoma” Ayato firmly pushed Thoma to the side and scooped some of his servants release in his hand. 

 “Clean this up” Ayato said as he held his hand out to you. “Beg for it like the good toy you are”. He bore a hole through you with his stare and words. “If you are good maybe you will get to cum for me again”. “Please sir” you proceeded to open your mouth wide. “Very good” Ayato slowly dripped some of Thoma’s essence on your tongue. As you licked his hands clean he suddenly shoved his fingers deeper in your throat. 

“Such a pretty servant, such a shame that Thoma didn’t share you with me .”.  “How selfish” he quietly spoke looking at Thoma’s lust filled eyes. The blonde had no idea how to react to the scene in front of him. He felt so bad for enjoying it. 

Pleasuring his love and seeing his proper lord covered in sweat and making him beg was all he could ever want. You took in a handful of Thoma’s release “You are doing so well my pet” 

Ayato gives you a gentle scratch on your head. He finally uncuffed you. 

Ayato placed your back on his stomach. “Thoma come get your reward” he beckoned Thoma with his finger.  Thoma happily scooted in front of you patiently waiting for Ayato’s approval. The young lord  started feeling your naked body up. Putting his arms under your legs to give Thoma the access he needed.  Thoma slowly slid it in and started thrusting in you. “Thoma look at me”. He looked up at his lord. His eyes darkened as if he said that you were his, with just a mere gaze. Ayato pinched your nipples while looking him right in the eye. Ayato gently placed a hand on your throat. Thoma roughly sped up his trusts, feeling the anger of his jealousy flow through him. Ayato placed his hand on your jaw forcing your mouth open. Making sure your obscene moans and cries were heard. Praising Thoma in between moans.

You couldn't help but think how many people heard the two of you by now.

All the gossip around Thoma was already a lot but now this was definitely adding fuel to the fire. Ayato sat up a little and firmly pressed his hands on Thoma’s hips forcing Thoma’s cock out of you. Thoma’s head shot up to Ayato. “Beg my servants”.  “PLEASE LET ME CUM SIR!” he said with pleading eyes. ”Please let me cum my lord!” you whined. “Very good”. Ayato pulled Thoma’s hips towards you. Your vision began to blur, your orgasm blissfully arriving. He pressed Thoma deep inside you. His tip kissing your deepest part. Ayato muffled your moans with his hand, your eyes began watering from the overwhelming feeling. Thoma released fully in you. Thoma praised you for taking him so well when he came.

Thoma finally gasped for air, settling down from his release. He started softly massaging you as you slowly passed out on Ayato’s chest. 

“You two did very well servants” Ayato uttered, massaging your scalp while praising you softly. After you fell asleep, Thoma layed next to his lord. “I finally understand why you love them so much Thoma.” Ayato continued stroking your head softly. Thoma smiled as he drifted to sleep. Looking at your sleeping figure before closing his eyes. 

The morning light blinded you and your lord of you wait…TWO? You examined the bed once more and there was no Thoma to be found. Ayato was still asleep. You heard the door slide open and you shifted your head towards the door. In a sigh of relief. It was just your loving partner with a tray in his hand. Overcrowded with breakfast food and drinks.

He greeted you with a warm smile.

“Good morning my love”.

#genshin smut #genshin impact fanfics #thoma x reader #ayato x reader #genshin x reader #genshin impact

[eddiefkmunson]

Cold hands

Eddie Munson x female cheerleader! Reader

AN: This is my first time writing a fic for Eddie and on tumblr in general so I hope you like it. Also English isn’t my first language so I’m sorry if there are any mistakes. Now please enjoy.

You didn’t know why you needed to wear your cheerleading uniform at school even when it was winter and freezing cold outside but your friends who were also on the cheerleading team convinced you that it would keep the boys on the basketball team motivated to continue training trough out the winter. Normally you wouldn’t have cared about those jocks but you didn’t want to let your best friend Chrissy down when she asked you last week to wear it. You certainly regretted wearing it today though as you were walking trough the school’s parking lot to meet with your boyfriend Eddie at the picnic bench in the woods behind the school. It was your usual spot were you two hung out during school hours. The cold air was nipping at every part of your body that was exposed because of your uniform and you tried to wrap your jacket tighter around your body to shield yourself from the cold.

You wished that you could just sit at luch together like every couple did at school but it didn't matter how many times you tried to convince Eddie that you should make your relationship public he refused to do so. He always told you that it would make everyone think differently of you for being with him and that he would ruin your “perfect” reputation. Telling him that it didn't matter to you what people thought of you and your relationship and that you didn't care one bit about your reputation and that you would much rather walk around school with his arm firmly tucked around you, he just wouldn't change his opinion on the situation. So that's why you were walking down the schools parking lot during lunch in the cold to meet with your boyfriend in secret, because you would do anything to make him happy.

As you neared the tree line of the woods you started feeling your hands going numb from the cold. You thought about how you should have brought some warm gloves with you to school as you walked your first steps into the woods that you were by now very familiar with. As you got deeper into the woods the excitement that you felt everytime you went to see Eddie started to grow. After a couple of minutes of walking the picnic bench you always met at came into view and on top of it sat your boyfriend. He was as handsome as always, his curly brown hair was swaying due to the cold wing blowing it in all kinds of directions. Oh, how much you just loved to run your hands trough it when you and him were alone in his trailer listening to music. His ringed fingers were drumming on top of the bench while he was waiting for you. You had always found his hands very eye catching because they were so much bigger than yours and those rings didn't exactly make it easy to ignore them when he was waving his hands around when excitedly talking to you about his next dnd campaign. The only thing you couldn't see was his beautiful face as his back was turned to you. That's when an idea came to your mind.

You started sneaking up to him as quietly as possible and tried to keep in your giggles as you thought of your plan. Finally standing behind him you slowly lifted your ice cold hands to the side of his face before cupping his cheeks from behind. A yell came from Eddie as your cold hands touched his cheeks and he quickly turned around to face you."Princess, don't scare me like that please, are you trying to give me a heart attack?" You couldn't hold in your laughter anymore as you started apologizing for scaring him. He didn't seem to mind that much as he got of the bench and came closer to you and wrapped his arms around you. “You know I'm getting you back for this one day, right?” You nodded but before you could actually greet him he put a significantly warmer hand on your cheek before pulling you into a soft kiss as a greeting. After the kiss he lot go of you and brought you over to sit next to him on the bench. “Give me vour hands Y/N, I'll warm them up for you.” Eddie said as you did what he told you and put your hands in his much bigger ones. He started gently rubbing your red and cold hands and as a rest heat spread over them but you thought of something even better.

"Hey Eddie, I know an even faster way to warm them up" you said as you looked up at him with a mischievous glint in your eyes. He looked down at you and looked into your eyes, sensing you were up to something but he still replied with "is that so? Then why don't you tell me sweetheart." You grinned up at him before answering with a quick "I'll show you” as you took your hands out of his and laid them on his waist. He gave you a confused glance but you paid no mind to it as you quickly put your hands under his shirt and on his warm stomach. You giggled as you felt a shiver run trough Eddies body and a yelp left his lips." they're way to cold! I'm going to freeze if you keep them there." He said in his usual dramatic way. You pouted at him as you said "but it feels so nice Eds, you're sooo warm." He looked at you for a moment before wrapping his arms around you and pulling you further into him and his warmth. "Well if my princess likes it so much who am I to deny her what she wants." You smiled into his shoulder where your head was rested as you felt Eddie nuzzle into your hair and kiss the top of your head. You melted into him as you enjoyed how his body around you kept you warm and shielded you from the cold weather.

It's save to say that you spend the rest of the lunch period wrapped in each other's embrace.

#eddie munson #eddie x reader #eddie x fem!reader #eddie x female reader #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x female reader #eddie munson x fem!reader #stranger things #eddie munson x cheerleader!reader

[ihatetmblrclassifyingthings]

Guess I’ll make my midlife (while not in my midlife, I hope) crisis my first post to observe how tumblr works.

Do you ever just feel your heart drop while also managing to beat so hard that it gives you a nausea headache? I literally just survived one horribly beautiful aspect of my life, and now it feels like that again right now, but without training wheels— and an additional volcano— and several loved friends ready to laugh and mock me— And be disappointed in me…

I’m both new and used to university. I’ve never had to withdraw from a class before though— until what feels like now. I wouldn’t care about my grades as much, but I’m completely reliant on scholarships, AND I WILL BE COMPLETELY RELIANT ON THEM FOR GRADUATE STUDIES.

So without money, I rely on essentially perfect grades for money. I don’t have a job, because I pour all my effort into school; if I didn’t I’d be in a crazy (and unfortunately common) amount of debt. I’ll need scholarships once I hit graduate school too.

But right now I’m taking a class I need. We had a BIG test, and I did poorly, even with studying (mainly +5 straight hours before the exam, which is x5 more than I’ve ever done). And with that grade, unless I did absolutely perfect (which is impossible), I wouldn’t finish with a A. Maybe a B, at most. I’ve had worrisome classes before, but this one I genuinely think is a lost cause.

I have to figure out if having a W that I hope to replace with a future A would impact my GPA. Would I still have the chance for a 4.0? A chance at my graduate merit scholarships?

I’d ask for extra credit, but it’s explicitly forbidden for the type of course it is… There’s free tutoring, but I just don’t learn well with tutors, and there would be no guarantee the tutor would focus on the right things…

I know Tumblr won’t have any quick answers for me, this is a school specific matter, but… I guess I wanted to vent, because I feel like sobbing and hyperventilating because school is the only thing I’m good at that matters to survival, and the people around me will be so disappointed….and it may be my life, but it f*cking sends me into such a bad spiral when they’re disappointed…. And it hurts…

My antisocial, anxious self actually made friends in this class too, so that sucks even more to consider withdrawing. Cause I will drift apart and never see them again thanks to things both outside and inside my control.

It helped a bit to write this, but not a lot. But I see why you guys write on Tumblr now somewhat. I still feel like I’m going to cry and throw up and spiral. This all feels like my fault because I obsessed over some new fandoms lately when I should’ve worked more, even if I think that it wouldn’t have made a difference…I still feel guilty.. Please excuse any grammar/spelling/etc mistakes.

Does or has anyone felt like this before? It may get better, but the unknown is really pushing me towards an anxiety attack right now.

#first post #university #college #finance #i feel guilty #and mad #at myself #advice #i hate college #i'm sad

[goremet-chef]

Pretty

kelvin x cicero oneshot cuz its good for my soul :]] ive never really posted writing directly to tumblr SOO sorry if the format is weird but whatevs 1.7k words - fluff, a little spicy at the end but nothing more than kissing

Cicero leaned back against a tree, attempting to calm the fast pace of his breath. Generally, he prefers Kelvin stays at the base when he goes looking for materials and what not, because its safer for him. Kelvin getting hurt is a risk he's not willing to take in the slightest, even if that means putting himself in danger without him. They had a pretty efficient system. One of them could hardly hear a thing, the other could hardly see a thing, so logically they were better when they were together. Despite knowing this, Cicero would order Kelvin to stay back at camp while he went off into the dark woods to forage, alone.

That's how he got into this situation in the first place. He'd never admit just how poor his eyesight really is, but it would speak for itself when he ended up bumping shoulders with a cannibal. He was unfocused, and the cannibal hadn't moved. Sound was the only effective way he'd notice the person in front of him, so it was a recipe for disaster.

Of course they didn't take too kindly to being pushed by an outsider and before he knew it, there was about 5 others ready to attack him. The fight wasn't very long, fighting mutants all the time gives you a better chance against regular people. Unfortunately, a few of them got pretty heavy blows on Cicero, and once they were all dealt with, he needed to rest and recover his strength.

Their base wasn't too far from where he sat behind the tree, and he knew it would do him better to make his way back home. He took one last deep breath, before struggling to stand, and turning in the direction of camp.

When he got back, Kelvin was gathering more sticks for their holders. The sight brought warmth to Cicero's heart. He didn't really ask much of Kelvin once they were all set, and yet he still did whatever he could to help anyways. It was sweet. Kelvin didn't notice him immediately, but Cicero shuffling into his peripheral made him jump, nearly losing his grip on the twigs he had found. At first, he smiled when he realized it was only his partner, but it quickly faded when he saw the blood that covered him, and the cuts on his face.

Carelessly, Kelvin dropped the sticks and quickly made his way over to check Cicero out. Cicero waved him off, moving past their gate and into their base with Kelvin close behind. He was going to put what he had gathered in their proper places, but a hand on his shoulder stopped him from moving any further. Cicero glanced at him curiously, and Kelvin motioned for him to follow, seating him at one of their benches. Cicero huffed indignantly, but he didn't bother to put up a fight.

Kelvin left him for a moment to go grab some of their spare cloth and dunk it in the river. Cicero already knew what was up, turning to face his friend when he came back and sat down next to him. He closed his eyes and let Kelvin wipe the blood off of his face, lips quirking in a smile when the cloth brushed gently against his wounds. Kelvin was always thoughtful like that, it made him feel so... Appreciated, and cared for. A tender hand came to cup his face and he unconsciously leaned into it, snorting when Kelvin's movements halted for a moment. Cicero opened his eyes to look at him, and the eye contact spurred Kelvin to continue cleaning him up. His face was slightly flushed, and he was avoiding his eyes. It was incredibly cute to Cicero, and he couldn't hide his smile any longer.

His change in facial expression caused Kelvin to finally meet his eyes, and he gave Cicero a confused look. Cicero only continued to stare at him with complete adoration, partly hoping Kelvin could feel it without any words needing to be exchanged. It seems he did, because his face only got redder and he averted his eyes once more. Cicero merely relished in the sight further. The way the sun lit up Kelvin's face, his hair... His skin was slightly glistening under the suns beams, slick with sweat from the work he had been doing while Cicero was away. Kelvin's eyes were focused on his face, taking gentle care of the cuts and scrapes there. Cicero couldn't help staring when he looked so damn good.

From Kelvin's perspective, Cicero smiling at him like that made his heart stop for a few moments. Cicero was always wound tight, never letting much emotion slip if he could help it, so for him to be gazing into Kelvin's soul with that look was almost too much for him to handle. He was worried that maybe he wasn't reading him properly, and once the blood had been sufficiently cleaned, he set the cloth on his leg and reached into the pocket of Cicero's tactical vest, pulling out their notepad.

'Do I have something on my face?' He absentmindedly rubbed his cheek a bit while handing the notepad to his friend, in case he did have something there that was seeming to entertain Cicero so much.

Cicero merely chuckled reading the note, which made Kelvin even more nervous for a moment but he shook his head and scribbled a response. He was a bit hesitant to hand the paper back to Kelvin, but he could see Kelvin wasn't understanding and figured there was no harm in being bold with how he felt at the moment. Kelvin's eyes widened when he read the note.

'you're so pretty' Was all it said, and he nearly blew a fuse. His breath had hitched and he glanced at Cicero a few times to see if he really meant it. Cicero only continued to adore him, his reactions, everything about him was so perfect in that moment. Kelvin squirmed a little under his gaze, but a sheepish smile crept its way onto his face, which felt hot to the touch. He could tell by the look in Cicero's eyes that his comment was genuine, and it thrilled him honestly. No one had ever called him pretty before, it made him feel wanted in a way he didn't know he needed until now.

He timidly reached into his pocket and pulled out some aloe vera plant. He still needed to properly treat Cicero's wounds, but he found it hard to look at him at all now. Still, he cupped his face once more, spreading the familiar goo onto the sparse cuts on his partners face, before releasing him and letting out a shaky sigh. Cicero grinned at the response, and feeling brave he decided to stand from where he was, only to seat himself in Kelvin's lap. Kelvin let out a surprised yelp, looking down at him in shock, puffs of his hot breath mingling with Cicero's at the closeness. Despite his nervous expression, his hand slowly settled on his partner's hip, keeping him in place.

Cicero reached up to caress the side of Kelvin's face with his knuckles, feeling the heat in his cheeks. His eyes drifted towards Kelvin's lips and he couldn't help but admire them as well. They looked soft, and inviting, contrasting his own which were scarred and bloody half the time. He couldn't help but wonder how good they'd feel pressed against his, though. When they locked eyes again, Kelvin whimpered a bit, hoping they were thinking the same thing right now. Cicero's eyes darkened in a way that sent a shudder throughout his companions whole body, and Kelvin lifted a hand up to brush through Cicero's curls. He smiled softly at the affection and sighed at the touch, leaning in a bit and glancing between Kelvin's eyes and his lips with a sultry look on his face. Kelvin had done the same, but he still felt a bit timid, always afraid he was misreading the obvious signs he was receiving.

Cicero rolled his eyes, having grown tired of the tension between them and brought his other hand to cup Kelvin's face, pulling him in for a rough and passionate kiss. His lips felt better than Cicero could've possible imagined, the feeling threatened to intoxicate him fully. It was bliss, finally being able to connect with Kelvin this way. He had harbored the most intense feelings for his squadmate for so long, it felt like amazing to finally be pressed against him in a way he only ever dreamed of. Kelvin whined a little at the harshness of their lips locking, but that only fueled Cicero's desire, his hot breath fanning over Kelvin's mouth as he pulled away for a brief moment, only to come back with the same vigor. Kelvin wrapped his arm around Cicero's waist fully, pulling him closer while Cicero swiped his tongue against the other's lips, a silent request. Kelvin quickly obliged, the sensation of their tongues swirling around one another causing him to moan long into their frantic kiss. The sound stole the remaining air out of Cicero's lungs, and he reluctantly pulled back, gasping for breath. Kelvin's shoulders heaved the same, and he looked bewildered, excited and happy all at the same time.

They stared at one another for a moment, before Cicero chuckled at the stunned look on Kelvin's face. Kelvin couldn't help but smile as well, pulling Cicero close to him and nuzzling his face against his neck, trying to come down from his high. They stayed like that for a while, Cicero's hand softly running through Kelvin's hair and keeping him pressed close. It felt damn good, like he was getting something off of his chest that had been weighing him down for a long time. Kelvin felt the same, relieved that his feelings weren't unrequited. Knowing they held the same love for one another made them feel like everything would be okay, for the moment at least.

The kiss that had been shared would be one of many, as they would offer each other a newer, unexplored comfort while facing the demons that lurked in this hellhole. Moments like this made living on the island more like a dream than a nightmare, something neither of them would take for granted.

#sons of the forest #sons of the forest kelvin #sotf #kelvin sotf #fanfic #sotf fanfiction #kelvin #self insert #self ship #fanfiction #teeheein #glad i was able to actually finish something #its a lot shorter than what im used to but #literally need to call him pretty so fucking bad #its not even funny #sotf kelvin #sotf oc

[tea-with-evan-and-me]

"i can certainly understand why you would think the concept of tons of people knowing your amazon reviews would be embarrassing, but quite frankly, almost all of the topics we discuss here would make us uncomfortable if it was about us."

That is true. But i think there is a difference between discussing things within a circle of people that won't really leave the platform, like the anon discussions on your blog, and people sharing stuff on tiktok to go viral. We know that most things discussed here probably will never reach Evan unless he or his friends chooses to search his hashtag on Tumblr, which i doubt they do. It's different however when there is certain information circulating on every social media platform and private info boiling up to the surface. I think the likelihood of his sister, family friends or Haley seeing it is much bigger and idk... i would feel mortified. I feel like we are too comfortable seeing Evan as a celebrity and expecting him to endure privacy invasions because of that. He is a celebrity but he is a human first of all, who enjoys acting and sadly his profession comes along with being a public figure. However he isn't like most celebrities, he hates the public part of it and he values his privacy very much. He just wants to be a normal guy and is doing everything so he can continue living his life as a normal guy. I'd like to say again that I'm not blaming anybody for posting the information. He should have been more careful in the first place and not share his Spotify name with Frances, but sadly it's too late and he wasn't taking that into account. The thing that gives me the most discomfort is that this information is floating around uncontrollably and will likely find its way to Evan one way or another (if it hasnt already) and i just know it's going to give him the biggest freak out and my heart can't take it.

a couple of things:

1. i’m not really sure what you mean when you say you believe certain things stay within this platform. most people who have tumblr also have other social media, so it stands to reason that things will circulate from time to time. i genuinely wonder how evan or his friends and family would know about anyone discussing his spotify or his amazon profile, or really anything about him without searching for fan discussions. if i asked someone outside of fandom, who never visited any fan pages, about evan peters spotify profile they would be clueless. i think you're viewing this like evan and his social media burner accounts are somehow just outside of the circle of his fandom, and it would be easy for him to accidentally stumble onto this stuff; in reality, if he does not engage, that would be like saying because i have a twitter account i know what happens in pedro pascal's fandom. i have no fucking clue what anyone knows or doesn't know about him because i am not in any way affiliated. unless evan, his friends or his family purposely interact with fandom this information is not on anyone else's radar besides those of us who are super interested in evan peters. but if they seek it out, then it stands to reason that they will see things that are likely to make them uncomfortable. i'm sure it would not be pleasant for anyone near him to view the conversations we have about the domestic violence situation, but that doesn't mean i'm not going to broach that topic. if anything, i do wonder why are you not more bothered by that than evan's amazon reviews? not attacking you, i'm genuinely curious because to me, one is so much more sensitive than the other

2. evan's spotify being discovered precedes frances. i don't place any blame on evan for sharing it with anybody, it's reasonable to share your spotify with friends or family or your girlfriend.

3. i understand and find it respectable how much evan lives his life like a normal dude. however, he is not you or i. we live average, normal lives with jobs that do not make us of interest to the public. no matter how humble, evan’s career as an actor has made him a multi-millionaire and given him the many wonderful life perks that come with that. the downside is that you will not enjoy the privacy that a normie like myself gets. fans finding your amazon reviews might be embarrassing or weird, but i don’t think it should cause any deep emotional turmoil. especially because there is nothing literally tying it to evan, neither is his spotify account. he could easily deny it and just say this is a weird fan theory, because we have no literal proof it’s his.

finally, i totally get that your comments are just coming from a place of concern that evan would be made uncomfortable to see us discussing these things, i am not taking it as a condemnation or you trying to shame folks. and i am not in the business of policing anyone's feelings. if that's what you feel, it's valid. the premise of this blog is, by nature, intrusive. as respectful as we may aim to be, discussing a stranger's personal life is still an intrusion in most peoples' eyes. i am of the opinion that when you become a celebrity, interest in your personal life is a part of the fame package that you do not get to opt out of. there's always positives and negatives in anything you do. i hate getting up early, but my job requires that i am available in the morning most days. i have a fruitful career that affords me financial freedom and a lifestyle i enjoy; so i will get my butt up in the AM despite not enjoying that part, because i feel the good far outweighs the bad. i know there's plenty of aspects to evan's career he probably doesn't love, but the good outweighs the bad for him.

and ultimately.. this is a gossip blog. i have utmost respect for evan and a deep fondness for him as a person and an actor, but at the end of the day, i do not know him personally and i can't really say what he would or wouldn't feel. but i have a feeling he wouldn't love the premise of a gossip blog dedicated to him.

[chubby-aphrodite]

I think in all my time on tumblr this is first time I’ve posted a pic of my dad?

Anyway. My dad died on 9/11. He was an IT guy for Cantor-Fitzgerald. I grew up constantly hearing about how I looked and sometimes acted just like him, but I only really got it a couple months ago when I looked in the mirror with my hair pulled back and went “Oh fuck I see it now.”

It’s… been hard. Growing up without one of your parents and then the other still reeling from the trauma of losing her true love and sorta fucking you up in the process? Hard. I’m 21 now, legally old enough to drink in the United States.

In hindsight, all the constant faux-apologies from people I barely knew about my dad dying in a national tragedy was fairly embittering. It was never really about me or my family when they brought it up, it was always either hollow apologies or where they were or what they were doing when it happened. I was barely three months old and didn’t even grasp that my life was different before then. But then for the rest of my goddamn life, I always had to be subjected to it. Over and over.

As a little kid, and even now sometimes, I could be… overly empathetic. The way I always tried to relate to some’s hardships was imagining myself in their place, and think about what it would be like.

Almost every year in elementary and middle school, we would be made to watch a documentary on it. So, me being that kind of empathetic little kid, imagining myself being there, and then connecting that Oh, that’s what actually physically happened to my dad, that’s why he’s dead was… overwhelming, to say the least.

It got both worse and better as I got older. Everyone started realizing hey, let’s maybe not retraumatize this kid again and started letting me stay home from school on that day, no questions asked.

I also started actually understanding the repercussions of everything as I got older. The jingoism, the ultranationalism, the islamophobia. I think for a few years in my teens I sort of repressed my own feelings about it and tried to act as though I wasn’t someone personally affected by it, and therefore only focused on the effects it had on literally everything else. But, now, I realize there’s… not really much I as one person can do about all that, other than try to spread word about aligning yourself against them. So I think that’s part of why everything’s hit me so hard lately, I’m just finally actually able to process my emotions like a goddamn adult.

I don’t really know what else to say, so I guess I’ll introduce my dad. His name was John. He liked computer games and Dungeons and Dragons growing up, and even founded the local high school’s DnD club while he attended. He made snarky comments and jokes about things a lot. He once went outside in the snow wearing only a bathrobe to grill himself a burger. He fell completely head over heels for my mom after she chugged a beer in one go and then belched it out. He loved my mom, my sister, and me very much.

I’ve been thinking of cutting my hair short lately. One of the pros I’ve been thinking about is giving all the people who say I look like him a heart attack. Because I think that’d be really funny, and he probably would’ve thought it was funny, too.

So. Yeah.

#long post #okay to reblog

[cxsmicmyeon]

You said friends should send their opinions about the Junmyeon thing. And like yeah they tease him but he always gives it back too? He would relentlessly tease Jongdae for instance, when Jongdae is the one who says Junmyeon is his bias in EXO - so you know hyper focusing in on how your fave is the one being treated badly is a weird mindset if you can not acknowledge all the way he gives that back and teases the other members too. Another example I could think of about Junmyeon saying something that out of context could seem quite mean spirited is when during the aquarium visit in climb the ladder he mentioned that Beluga whale's IQ is the same es Sehun's. If anon wants to bring up how members behaviour looks to non fans then how does Junmyeon calling the maknae stupid look to outsiders? I am not saying this to attack Junmyeon but merely to illustrate my point that this kind of thing is something they all do. He isn't the one victim TM in this group. Plenty of times someone else is the butt of the joke. Often even jokes made by Junmyeon. These guys even found ways to clown on Kyungsoo non verbally when he made a hand gesture to shoo the camera away they all copied him. Its like they are us here on tumblr with stupid shit becoming a meme in their group immediately kinda like how vanilla extract was a thing. And you don't have to find every meme funny. Just like you don't have to find their jokes funny. But they are jokes. Among friends. And francly you are doing a little too much self projecting onto your bias if you think he is the only one in the crosslines of this kind of bad fun. Like maybe if we tally up every joke on every aired second of exo content out there we can draw percentages of who they make fun of the most often. But what would be the point of that other than giving fans another metric for in fighting. Like do the solo stans of the members that get made fun of the most get to then go on and hate everyone else. People already hate each other over whose fave has the least amount of views the least amount of screentime the least jobs etc etc. We gotta stop doing this its ridiculous. Because these boys love each other. They have proven over nearly 11 years just how much they love each other genuinely so dredging up who said what about whom in order to sow discourse is in my opinion so so stupid

this is perf. just great points all across rina.

like i have been saying there is no malice or ill intentions with the joking around because they've known each other for so long. also not to mention theyre all grown adults so im pretty sure they can take light hearted teasing lol.

idk i never really saw this as some sort of issue considering the fact thats just what theyre like and everyone dishes it out and takes it. just bc theres teasing doesnt mean they dont like each other as ive said they are nothing but supportive of each other and have been for 11+ years.

i do wanna give anon the benefit of the doubt maybe theyre new to the fandom and arent aware of the dynamic just yet but never in my years of stanning did i think any member was a target in bad intentioned making fun and im kinda upset i was doubting it ngl

exo will always be together and are 9. exo will always be there for each other. i hope this makes sense im tired lol

#asks #friend asks! #anon i hope u see this and understand

[wahbegan]

On H.P. Lovecraft

After reading two of Leslie Klinger’s fabulous Complete Annotated Works of Lovecraft, various fragments from several of his own letters, and several of the kind of articles debating his merit or lack thereof in light of his flagrant racism and xenophobia that always crop up around the time any new adaptation comes out, I feel like I could write a fucking essay with sources and shit psychoanalyzing the scope and nature of this sad bastard’s damage.

I even thought about it, but I’m gonna try to keep it brief because this is fucking tumblr, not a scholarly journal. What I will say is this: I was afraid of Lovecraft as a child. Not his writing, but the man himself. After seeing his creations and reading his weird-ass fucking name at 8 years old, I paused in wonder at what kind of abyss-eyed fucking lunatic he must be. Google image Alan Moore and then imagine him built like a brick shithouse and racially ambiguous and with even scarier eyes and that’s basically what i pictured.

This was as a kid, of course, before I knew that horror writers were very rarely frightening people themselves and, by and large, tended to fall into two camps: the utterly ordinary (your Stephen Kings) and the anxious, phobic, neuroses-plagued wrecks that could barely step outside without having a panic attack (that would be your Poes)

Lovecraft, of course, falls in the latter camp. 

Later, I learned that he of course was frightening for much different, more mundane reasons. Violent racism, a hatred towards most ethnicities on the globe (apart from, of course, Anglo-Saxon as well as a few hand-picked ones from around the globe he believed to be worth a shit, but still felt should stay far the fuck away from him) a lukewarm “well they’re ridiculous and going too far, but their hearts are in the right place” shrug of the shoulders towards the burgeoning nazi party in Germany, a sigh and shake of the head, with a “well, it’s unfortunate, but what do you expect these people to do?” towards lynchings in America, and a eugenicist attitude that wasn’t out of place at the turn of the century, but was noticeably more pronounced in Lovecraft than the average American citizen.

Lovecraft is often called “fair for his time”, but it’s a phrase I find disingenuous, unspecific, and unhelpful. A thoroughly unforgivable monster by today’s standards, he would at the standards of the time, be...roughly the equivalent of an alt-righter, tottering right on the line between socially acceptable prejudice to the more standard bigots and what was, even then, considered fringe lunacy. He may not have been the kind to storm the Capitol, but he would be the one only  reluctantly and mildly condemning their actions and violently railing against any intimation of Trump’s involvement. That’s about where he would fall on today’s spectrum, roughly.

But the more I’ve learned about him recently, the more I realize he was, beyond his obvious and untreated mental illness, a deeply pathetic human being, with a racism and xenophobia founded mostly in an absolutely broken view of the world and his relation to it.

Of course can he be frightening in his hatred, his voice a weapon despite his personal squeamishness about violence? Of course. You can be pathetic and frightening at the same time. It’s remarkable, in fact, how often those traits coincide.

But I am able to take some comfort in it. 

Now this is the part where I would back this up with a bunch of fragments of his writings and letters but I can’t be arsed so just do me a solid and give me the benefit of the doubt, but two things become clear from studying the man’s correspondences and his dream-cycle stories.

First, that he could see absolutely no unifying human condition, no allegiance to the species as a whole, no such concept as a brotherhood of man or a global community or anything of that nature. The goal of life, he stated in no uncertain terms, was to do your best to preserve the lifespan of your own kind, people just like you, your personal culture and way of life. There was nothing else. That was the way to make your mark on the world. Even when he admired other cultures, he felt the best thing they could do was keep away from HIS culture, preserve THEIR traditions, and refrain at all costs from intermixing THEIR blood with lesser ethnicities, a practice he said ruined both India and Egypt. 

The second, that becomes evident once you read enough of his dream stories in a row, is that the man was fucking obsessed with reclaiming his childhood. I don’t know what kind of trauma this guy endured exactly eehhh i mean his dad going insane and dying of syphilis and his mother following suit for unrelated reasons probably had something to do with it, but anyway. Whatever his damage, it clearly left him, his whole life, so profoundly nostalgic for a time of innocence in his childhood that he could never recover and possibly never even existed that it bordered on an obsession. 

The man died at 46 living with his Aunt in the same town he was born in. And that wasn’t because of circumstances of poverty, that was by choice. Desperate to recapture a ghost, grabbing at the smoke of some feeling he only thought existed because that’s what memory does to people.

We take these ideas, we mix them with his clear fear of the unknown and his anxieties of insignificance, and a clear picture of the psychology of his hatred can be ascertained. 

He was a boy who never grew up. A terrified child, running from a world so much bigger than him, a world he felt insignificant and worthless in, a world that scared and confused him in its noise and chaos and change. All he wanted was the safety of his (privileged, sheltered, very very anglo-saxon) childhood back. And in his fear, he clung to white supremacy for dear fucking life, shrieking obscenities about the lower life-forms around him because if his genes weren’t special, if his race wasn’t special, if his culture didn’t deserve to be preserved....what was there? What was the point of being alive at all? The point of living, after all, was to preserve your kind, your name, your culture. Yet he moved to New York and was surrounded by people from a thousand other places and a thousand other cultures and none of them cared and he wasn’t special at all. 

Like I said, it’s kinda pathetic.

And yet...he has endured. Not because of the racism he thought would save him, but in spite of it. Because the world is full of better and more forgiving people than him, people of different cultures and races who are willing to overlook his stupid, his pathetic bullshit and see the potential that is there.

The almost universally celebrated Mexican film-maker Guillermo del Toro makes absolutely no mystery about how much he adores Lovecraft and often cites him as an influence. The Japanese Junji Ito, whose horror manga’s images i guaranteed are seared into your brain even if you don’t know his name, has cited him as well, and of course there’s Victor Lavalle. Victor Lavalle, the black author who won the Shirley Jackson Award undertaking the fucking Herculean task of salvaging a decent story out of  the spectacularly racist and simply quite bad short “The Horror at Red Hook”, a labor I, and I imagine most critics, would have dismissed as a waste of time. 

A black author. Black folks being, of course, one of his most violently maligned races. And a black author turned one of his shittiest, most racist works into a worthwhile story and, for his efforts, was asked to write a forward for one of the definitive anthologies of his work, ripping him a new asshole even as it praised him.

And that’s the beauty of the thing. The final cosmic joke played on Howard Philips. 

Lovecraft’s work enduring in so many styles, with so many people of different racial and cultural backgrounds, is in and of itself testament to how wrong he was. The more his stories are adapted or used as jumping off points by black or Latino or Asian (or Dutch, Irish, Polish, etc.) creators, the more they are not only saved from obscurity but improved by the addition of different voices, the more tiny and pathetic and childish his worldview of keeping himself safe by isolating to his Anglo-Saxon little corner of New England seems.

Some people feel Lovecraft is vindicated by his posthumous fame and growing global legacy. Personally, I feel like it spits in the face of everything he stood for. Lovecraft, in his way, was perfectly content to let his horror be weird and fringe and read and defended only by his friends, to die feeling like he was a misunderstood outsider.

He was proud of his race and his racism, proud of his lineage and xenophobia and embarrassed of his stories. 

Now his work is celebrated by people all around the world who he would have fucking HATED, even as he is relentlessly posthumously bullied (in no small part by me) for his horrific worldview. 

Every time Guillermo del Toro takes Lovecraftian influence and makes a fable about tolerance, he rolls in his grave again. And I find that kind of funny.

#H.P. Lovecraft