#this is next on my to-watch list now that I’ve finished free

[demieyesore]

You - Theodore Nott

Currently listening to Hollywood undead while I write this fanfic, anyways I’m a big whore (unfortunately) and I see that currently my poll is around the same votes for Mattheo and Theo…so this one will be for Theo (since my first fanfic was for Mattheo) and then my next fanfic after this one will be Mattheo x Reader x Theo bc I absolutely love men and poly relationships‼️

Summary - Theo notices someone being too handsy with GN!Reader in class and gets possessive

Warnings / Mentions - Reader is not in a specific house, no use of Y/n, kind of strangers to lovers? Reader is friends with the golden trio, Harry is the one being touchy, Possessive!Theo, Yandere!Theo, Stalker!Theo (but doesn’t really mention anything creepy except claiming the Reader)

I am willing to make a smutty part two of this if anyone wants it and I hope y’all recognize what I’m loosely referencing in this fic at the end LOL

Requested - No

POV - 1st person

Word Count - 1979

I fiddle with my tie, trying to re-adjust the cloth as it hangs loosely around my neck. I had originally loosened it because it had gotten really hot in the class room but that can be expected when you’re working on potions from time to time.

Harry was assigned to be my potions partner. Ron and Hermione were sat next to us as we read off all the needed ingredients.

Harry begins listing the items while counting them on his fingers in 3s. Once he’s mesmerized part of the ingredients, his eyes drift towards me. His eyebrow quirks up when he sees me struggling with my tie.

Immediately he forgets the stuff we need as he reaches over to my tie, gently removing my hands from the area as he re-adjusts it for me. A small blush forms on my face at how close he has gotten. I can very easily see his scar up close and how his glasses are settled on his nose.

Has he always been this pretty?

As if on command, his hands drop from my tie. I look down at his hands and back up as he gives me a cute but awkward looking smile.

The kind of smile you give someone when you realize just how close you are before moving away.

Harry stands and goes to grab the ingredients.

Hermione smiles at me with a grin that just screams, “I told you he liked you.”

I roll my eyes at her, watching as Ron fucks up something in their potion, causing his eyes to go wide. Hermione’s attention is redirected as she hits the back of his head, pushing him over to fix whatever he’s done.

As I wait for Harry, I look around the room. Some people are already done with their potions, some are restarting. And by restarting, I mean that Seamus’ is covered with dust and his hair is everywhere.

Well now I know why it’s so hot in here.

My eyes wander next to him to see the next table of students. At this table, Blaise Zabini and Theodore Nott are sitting and just talking.

Looks like they’ve finished their potion.

I realize that Theo is looking at me and quickly look away.

I’ve talked to him a few times before but I really tried to stay away from his friend group. Except Enzo and Blaise, they’re really the only two I get along with well.

Being friends with the golden trio is nice but that just means that Draco’s friend group bitches about it all the damn time.

Harry walks back over, holding a tray in one hand with everything we need. He stands behind me, placing his free hand on my shoulder as he leans over me in order to place the tray on the table.

My eyes widen as a reaction at the touch. It’s not necessarily a touch that most people would think about however, I wasn’t used to people being physical with me.

#TouchStarved, I think to myself before cracking a smile at my own humor.

Theo and Blaise’s table is right behind where Hermione and Ron are sitting so I furrow my eyebrows when I see Theo staring directly at me still.

Ah shit he looks pissed.

I avoid eye contact with him because we all know that a mad Slytherin really isn’t someone you want to be around. Although I can’t help but wonder if he’s pissed at me for something. I never talk to his friends though so there shouldn’t be any problem.

I brush it off as Harry begins speaking.

“Alright. Um- could you hand me that knife?” I nod at his question, grabbing the blade next to me and handing it to him. He nods in appreciation.

Soon enough the potion is done and was a great success. Harry and I were really happy with how it turned out since this would be very important for our grade.

Harry and I smiled at each other and raised our arms, celebrating the victory. Harry’s hands make contact with mine in a double high five. At this I smile even bigger, entwining our hands before he pulls away.

We begin laughing as Ron groans, upset with how his potion was turning out. Hermione rolled her eyes before grinning at the Potter boy and I.

Harry had the greatest idea of standing up from his stool and pulling me to stand with him. Our hands were still locked as he began to make me dance with him. At first we were doing the waltz that we were taught for the Yule ball but after he spinned me, I came back to him and instead of having our hands together, he settled for placing his hands on my hips.

He began using his hands to guide my hips in a very different dance than the waltz.

My hands were around his neck as my hips swayed from the pressure of his hands. And honestly if we were at a party this would seem extremely sexual, but since it’s just Harry and I, it’s platonic fun.

Although it definitely brought yet another blush to my face, but I was like 100% sure that Harry didn’t like me. I think he’s just a very physical person when he becomes close with people.

The Professor looks over at us, staring us down as we both laugh before scrambling away from each other. Rushing to sit down before we got yelled at.

Once the Professor looks away, a note flies over and hits Harry in the glasses. He picks up the note with his eyebrows tensed in confusion. We both look over from where it came from and it was definitely from Theodore Nott.

The only way I could be sure is when I saw him motion for Harry to read the note.

I watch as Harry reads over the words. Clearly becoming more and more confused, stealing glances between me and the note.

“What is it? What’s it say?” I vocalize, inquisitively.

He shakes his head as if he were clearing an echa sketch. But instead of a drawing, he was clearing his thoughts.

“Ah- um- it’s nothing really.” Harry stutters, licking his bottom lip. Which I’ve become aware is one of his nervous signals.

His eyes connect with Theodore, who in return stares back. His stare is clearly more frightening since he has what I like to call “dead eyes”.

Those eyes are absolutely gorgeous but when the light fades from them when he’s pissed, it’s the most terrifying thing.

I make eye contact with Hermione, having a conversation with just our eyes. Asking about what’s happening seeing as the two boys look like they’re holding back to urge to jump the tables and punch each other in the face.

Granger shrugs.

I quickly try to gain control of the situation again by calling the brunettes name. “Harry?”

“Hm?” Instead of breaking eye contact with Nott, he just makes a hum of acknowledgment.

“What’s wrong? What did the note say?” I whisper to him, trying to cover our chat from Theodore.

Potter doesn’t make an effort to say anything, instead he throws the note in front of me to read. I pick up the note and begin reading from left to right.

“Back off from what I’ve been trying to claim.” Is the only sentence written on the piece of parchment.

My mouth drops open in surprise, my mind immediately drawing the dots together like Stiles does in teen wolf.

Man he’s a smart character. But also really stupid.

I get off track with my thinking, refocusing on the important thing at hand.

But honestly, I don’t care all that much. Is that a bad thing?

Now that I know why they’re both death glaring at each other, I can only feel my stomach erupt into butterflies.

I crumple up the note, trying to be sly as I slip it into my pocket but I see as Harry’s jaw clenches and Theo now has a shit eating grin on his face.

It lasts for a couple more seconds before Potter breaks eye contact first, scoffing at the Slytherin. Harry stands abruptly and turns to leave the classroom. Ron following after him as I hear the ginger exclaim, “Bloody hell mate!”

Hermione and I look at each other again, an expression on our faces that is making it very evident that we both thought that was attractive.

Like oh my god, two guys getting jealous and possessive over me.

Perhaps it is wrong to find it attractive but I love feeling wanted.

Class soon ends after that, Harry and Ron never returning back for anything. Hermione is left to pick up after them while I exit the class. Hermione agreed to cleaning up, knowing that my next class is basically across the school and with all the moving staircases and students. It’s just torture to arrive on time.

I walk as swiftly as I can, dodging people and walking between random people in order to reach my destination.

But before I reach my class, a hand is promptly placed on my upper back. I look over my shoulder to see Theodore standing tall over me. His hand still resting on the small of my back, showing his possessive and dominant side. Practically towering over me as he guides me over to a private area.

Which happened to be a janitor’s closet. He opened the door and gently but still roughly shoved me inside. He steps in after me, clicking the lock.

I was about to speak up but he cut me off.

“I want to make you mine.” He said with a completely straight face as he put it bluntly. His voice low and deep as he kept eye contact with me.

I froze with my eyes wide as a small smirk formed on his lips.

“What? Cats got your tongue, Amore Mio”

Oh okay that got me a little bit.

I feel a small wave of attraction wash over me, something so intense for just a moment it could visually be seen in my eyes.

“Oh oh ohhhh, you like it when I speak Italian don’t you, Dolcezza?” He inquires, his eyes searching my face for some kind of a reaction as a smile grows on him.

And the answer to that question is 1000% yes but why would I admit that???

Unfortunately my body betrays me as I swallow anxiously, giving him the flustered response he was hoping for.

He could literally be calling me a cunt in Italian and I wouldn’t know except based on his tone but I would still find it attractive.

His captivating eyes look down at my lips as he closes the space between us. He slowly looks back up into my eyes as he gets on his knees in front of me.

Oh I like that too.

Theo grabs my arm gently, placing a kiss on my inner wrist as he still keeps eye contact.

My stomach flips and I shuffle a little closer to him.

“Can I kiss you?” He questions, and holy shit I swear to god if he doesn’t look away I will because his eyes are literally hypnotic.

I nod but it’s not enough for him. His eyes are trained on me, pulling me down to be level with his height.

“Words.” Is all he says. Yet it’s such a powerful thing for me to hear right now.

“Yes, yes you can kiss me.” My face heats up, I turn my head away from him out of embarrassment. But he just grabs my face with his hands, aligning the kiss.

He hovers over my lips for a moment,

“If I wasn’t about to kiss you, I would’ve beat Harry bloody for the way he touched you.”

And just like that, our lips meet.

#slytherin boys #theo nott x y/n #theo nott x you #theodore nott x you #theo nott x reader #theodore nott x reader #yandere theodore nott #theodore nott #harry potter #possessive #stalker #yandere #lorenzo zurzolo

[nickypooh]

Can you watch my boyfriend for me?

Summary : you do the tiktok trend of leaving your phone to “watch” your boyfriend.

🎀★🎀★🎀★🎀★🎀

Chris and I were at dinner together and I had the idea of doing the tiktok trend where you set your phone up and leave to do something and they “watch” him, kinda like a babysitter in a way. I set my phone up on my glass of water and faced it towards Chris, starting the video and getting up. 

“Hey guys can you watch him while I go get the check please?” I say, getting up and walking away.

Chris looks from the phone to you walking away confused until he eventually understands that you aren’t coming back too soon. He looks at the phone while eating his chips and salsa. “Y’all want a chip?” He asks, holding a chip towards the phone. Chris being Chris had many random fun facts stored in his mind, and he was great at talking so he started listing off his facts.

“Umm did you guys know that ants don’t have lungs? Oh and baby elephants can’t control their trunk for a while after they’re born? Crazy right?”

He looked to see if you were coming back yet but you weren’t anywhere in sight yet so he kept talking to the phone. 

“Hmm what else do I know… Oh did you know that hummingbirds tongues are so long that they wrap around their head to protect themselves while they’re hammering? Ummm… a shrimp's heart is in its head. Ketchup used to be sold as medicine, so Matt would’ve been fucked. 

Oh, oh, the first person to be pulled over for speeding was going eight miles per hour.

Anddd did you know that wallabies can be pregnant for up to like two years, depending on when they wanna have the baby. “

When he finished listing his fun facts he could see you coming back so he sat there like nothing had happened, like he was just sitting there in silence with his chips. 

“Thanks for watching him guys” You smile at the phone as you stand next to Chris and grad your phone turning the video off. “Did you have fun?” You ask Chris.

“Yeah my chips were good.” He smiles as you both get your things and go out to your car to leave.

The caption of the video was “None of these even surprised me anymore, I’ve heard them so many times it’s crazy.”

🎀★🎀★🎀★🎀★🎀

🏷: @matty-bear

My requests are open right now, or if you just wanna talk to me feel free to anon/ask me anything. And if you want to be added to the taglist let me know! :)

#christopher sturniolo #chris sturniolo #sturniolo #sturniolo fanfic #sturniolo fluff #sturniolo imagine #sturniolo triplets #sturniolo x reader #chris x reader #🎀 fanfic

[russellsppttemplates]

That’s bullshit if I’ve heard of any (Lando Norris)

Lando finally had enough of seeing you hurt like that

Note: english is not my first language. I've been writing this one for a little bit and today felt like the day to finish it ✨️ this also felt close to home, but good to write it out, too!

Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated 🤍 and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!

my masterlist

Tw: reader's self-doubt and low self esteem, loneliness, curse words, mentions a bad date with a rude person

Tag list: @myloverjk-blog

"Are you sure you want me to come over?", you asked your best friend over the phone, refusing to accept that he had no better plans for his Friday night now that he was not racing.

"Is this your way of telling me you don't want to come over? Because that's fine, I'll stay in - are you going somewhere though? Like a date?", Lando said over the phoneline.

"Bold of you to assume I would have plans, and with a date nonetheless", you muttered, "all I'm saying is if you have something better to do, you should go do it!", you explained, not wanting to get into the topic too deeply.

"There's nothing better than spending time with my bestfriend! Do you need me to pick you up or do you feel comfortable driving at this time of night?", he wondered, "I'll be there in 10 then", you chatted off, ending the call.

Looking around your room, you found clothes that were both comfortable and presentable in case, with your usual luck, you were pulled over by the police and had to come out of your car.

Lando finally had some time off before the season began and he wanted to spend it with you. While you were usually able to fly out to most of the European races and even travel the long distance to other race tracks, this season you had more responsibilities to juggle between your internship, your studies and your family.

He arranged the pillows on the sofa and brought out your favourite snacks, getting his place ready while occupying the time until you rang his doorbell, walking up to the door so he could let you inside, "hey!", he greeted, excited to finally have you with him after weeks where you both had been busy.

"Hey", you said, nudging his hip slightly with yours as you went to the shoe cabinet, leaving your shoes there and putting on your slippers you kept at his house.

Following him silently to the living room, you watched him sit down as you took in the comfort his place made you feel.

"You're not okay", Lando stated, "I noticed when we were on the phone".

"So this is a pity visit?", you wondered, "That's why you called me over?", you grumbled, feeling the blush erupt on your cheeks along with a little annoyance.

"I never said that! I, I called you and then noticed you weren't okay! Scoot, scoot, I got a tray full of goodies for us to eat", Lando urged, pushing the blanket to the side so you could get in the warm cocoon he created with the soft fabric along with pillows in various shapes and sizes you had insisted he needed to make the place feel more home-y.

"Are you going to talk about what's on your mind or do you want to watch this new show in silence?", he wondered, pointing the remote at the TV.

"I don't want to talk about it, not now anyway", you grumbled, finding your perfect position as you laid against your bestfriend, his arm going around your shoulders as you snuggled your legs under the blanket.

The new show ended up involving a romantic couple which only heightened your feelings. Lately, it was all you could see. Everyone around you seemed to have something romantic going on and they were happy with it. One of your friends was even convinced that she would be proposed to within the next few months, and you were single. Soon enough after you entered these thoughts, they pulled you to questions like why won't people love me? why am I single? what is it that doesn't attract people to me? and the one that you had yet to find a proper answer to, the list becoming too long for your own good am I unlovable?

"Can we watch something else, please?", you asked after debating for a few minutes wether or not you should interrupt, "I'm sorry, but I'm not enjoying it that much", you mumbled.

"That's okay, Y/N, I'll just put on one of our reruns", he smiled, changing the streaming platform and looking for the square on the screen, "if you want to just lay here, that's fine, too", he encouraged.

"At least I'm not alone with my thoughts", you mumbled again, looking at the ceiling as Lando moved his neck to join you, "I'm not sure what you mean, but I'm here for you anyway", he squeezed your hand that found its way to his own.

"It's just, - I've been reflecting? I don't even know if that's the word, but I've been feeling lonely", you blurted, still unsure if you were voicing all of it.

Lando hummed, urging you to continue, "like, I'm craving to have somebody there for me, someone who I know is in my corner, who I feel totally comfortable with. My brother was telling me all about the stuffed bunny his girlfriend asked him to take care off! I want that with someone", you pouted.

Lando tensed, rearranging his position on the sofa to look at you softly as you kept looking at his white ceiling.

"Maybe I should be less opinionated, less vocal about what I think and feel", you mused.

You'd lose your essence, Lando thought as he heard you rant on and on about the traits you wanted to change about yourself.

"Changing something physical is harder, but maybe I can change that, right? Be a bit quieter with what I say, measure my opinions, say yes and agree with things more", you shrugged, shaking the whole thing off of your body, wanting to rid yourself of the thought, "I can't, I won't be able to do that, they'd notice it straight away", you sighed.

As the night went on, Lando quickly changing the subject, you spoke about anything that came to mind until you looked at your watch, "Fuck, it's so late, I have to go", you stood up quickly, bending to pick your slippers up from the floor when he stopped you, "stay in the guest bedroom for tonight. Sleep here", he tried.

"Is it because I said I was lonely? I was just venting it out, you don't need to worry about me being a loner", you tried your best to assure it.

"No, you muppet. I'm doing it because I don't like the idea of you having to drive all the way back at this time of night", he reasoned, getting up himself and walking with you to the guest bedroom.

"Is this still made from the last time I was here?", you wondered, looking at the sheets.

"I made it before you came here! And I've washed the sheets, thank you very much. You have a fresh bed to sleep on", he smiled charmingly.

"Thanks", you smiled back, grabbing the clothes you usually wore to sleep when you stayed over from the drawer, "those have been washed, too", he pointed, "if you need anything, I'm in my usual spot", he winked, "Good night, Y/N, sleep tight!".

"Thanks for this", you gestured, "Good night, Lando", you said before he saluted you playfully, closing the door behind him.

Using the ensuite for your night routine, you changed into the shorts and Lando's t-shirt, noticing that all of the washes had made it smell less of his cologne and more of the scented fabric softener he uses.

The t-shirt fit snug against your hips, embracing your curvy body as you got under the sheets, letting the weight of them lull you to sleep and slow down your thoughts.

.

Lando was driving to a restaurant he knew well enough. He had had a few dates there before, one team dinner and a few family birthdays too whenever they were in town.

But right now, he was picking you up. From a date that apparently wasn't going well since he got a text from you asking him to pick you up.

"Hey, gorgeous girl", he said once he opened the car window as he parked in front of the restaurant, thankful that it wasn't too busy and no one seemed to notice or care that he was there.

"Thanks for picking me up", you mumbled as you sat down, pulling on your seatbelt and nothing your bestfriend's gaze on you, silently questioning you.

"He was an asshole", you explained, "kept asking me if I was sure of what I was doing, if I knew any Formula One drivers - don't worry, didn't out anything - and then he just kept being rude to me, to the waiter, who was wonderful by the way".

"I didn't mean him. I don't care about him, I care about you", Lando said, driving back to his place, assuming you'd want to have someone close by that wouldn't ask too many questions.

"It was just another one where it didn't go well", you mumbled, letting your head rest on the window and looking out at the lights illuminating the city.

"Do you want to go to my place?", Lando asked, knowing you wouldn't want to be pushed about the subject, "yes, please", you said.

As soon as you got inside his place, you took your shoes off, walking up to the spare bedroom to leave your bag in there, "thank you for picking me up, you're the best, Lando", you smiled as you rested against the door frame.

"No worries, okay? Sleep tight, I have good plans for tomorrow so this will be out of your mind", he smiled a small one.

"Night night, Lando", you said back, closing the door behind you and letting the tears finally fall.

It was horrible. The way he treated other people should have been the first clue and red flag, but somehow it still surprised you how he conducted the whole date. You weren't expecting a prince or a gentleman, but you expected human decency and it turns out you were not afforded that. He kept leaving snarky comments about his exes. He was rude, sexist and definitely not your type, and after splitting the bill, you informed him that someone would come to pick you up.

Could someone be unlovable? Not worthy of love to the point where anyone they attracted to their presence just wasn't a match and they had to be content with the bare minimum?

Splashing some water on your face and wiping it with the towel, you took one good look in the mirror. It looks like it's going to be you for a while, so you might as well get used to it, Y/N.

.

When morning rolled around, Lando was the first to wake up, getting ready and heading to the kitchen to prepare breakfast for the two of you. He wanted to make something special, because even though you had your tough shell on yesterday, he knew you were feeling it deeply and painfully.

This quest of yours was doing you more harm than good. And it wasn't helping him either. For a few years, Lando figured, he has loved you. At first, it wasn't a clear sentiment. You were best friends, obviously there was a deeper connection. But then it felt so much all the time, there was never a break for the butterflies on his stomach or for the jealous green eyed monster whenever you so much as mentioned anyone else. He wouldn't dare say it, but he's so glad your date last night sucked.

As he prepared your coffee, your footsteps approached, "Good morning", you croaked out. You looked like you hadn't slept well, which Lando figured was a given considering the heard you move a lot during the night.

"Good morning, I made this for you. The balcony had nice sunlight right now, I figured you'd enjoy breakfast there", he attempted, bringing a small smile to your lips as you thanked him for the mug, "I'll bring the rest shortly", he called.

As you looked out to the always busy streets, you took in their quickness and rush. How it was all fleeting and momentary.

Lando placed the tray on the table, arranging it so you both could reach everything.

"I heard you crying last night", he began, his fist clenched at the memory as he sat down.

"I'm fine", you shrugged.

"I don't think you are, and I don't want you to suffer, Y/N", he insisted, unusually bold considering he knew which territory he was stepping into.

"It's not easy to come to terms with the fact that I'm single and that it might look like that for a bit, and who even knows how long that 'bit' might actually be", you chuckled, looking at him expecting his understanding gaze but being face with furrowed brows instead along with a scoff. "What? It's not like I'm being unreasonable, I'm just stating the facts", you squinted.

"That's not how it works, and you know that Y/N", he sternly spoke, straightening his back and facing you completely.

It was your time to laugh and scoff a little, "unless something changes within me, I'm sure this is how I'll find myself in the foreseeable", you shock your head.

"All of those things you want to change about yourself? Or that you say you should change to make you more likeable and lovable? That's dimming your light and your spark", Lando bit back, having had enough of it, "if someone loved you after all of those changes, they wouldn't love you for who you are, they would love a fabricated version of you. You're not unlovable", he smiled at the irony of it all. How after all these years, he still hadn't plucked up the courage to tell you how he felt about you.

"How can you say that when you have everyone falling at your feet? Women see you and they're ready to have anything you'll give them! You don't have to change who you are because someone made you feel like you couldn't be loved because of who you are and what you do!", you bit back, sensing a tone in him that was unusual and certainly not comfortable.

“I just need to know who the fuck told you you don’t deserve to be loved, because I’m about to beat their asses up", Lando called, elbows supported on the chair's arms as he looked at you.

"No one's ever told me, I'm probably the one saying it to myself, the rest of the people just make me feel like I'm unlovable, so if you want to hit me, I would prefer you didn't, I bruise quite easily", you tried to joke, not wanting to let your mind wander to the parallel utopian reality where your bestfriend feels the same way about you.

"Then it's all the people that made you feel unloved", Lando said, "none of them deserved a second of your attention, but I can give them a second of mine just for that".

“That’s a lot of people you’re gonna have to beat up, then, and I’m not sure if I want to bail you out of jail for that. We can't all have full bank accounts like yours", you joked again, watching him as he kept on with the subject.

"Stop joking about this! I'm being serious with you, Y/N! You deserve all of the love in the world - and even that wouldn't be enough!", he got up.

“Please, I think we have both realised and reached the conclusion that maybe I’m just not meant to be loved", you added.

“That’s bullshit if I’ve heard of any! No one’s not meant to be loved. There’s someone out there for you, and I think I’ve made it clear that, if it’s really not anyone else, then that someone’s me”, he stopped in front of you. There it was. Out in the open for everyone to hear. His balcony was covered and closed, something he was grateful about as he confessed his love for you.

"You can't joke about this", it was your turn to mention it, getting up as he took your hand in his.

"I'm not, Y/N, I'm really not", he whispered, resting his forehead in yours.

"Kiss me", you pleaded. He was quick to comply to your request, hand cupping your cheek as he tasted the bitter coffee from your lips and felt you unravel to him in a way he didn't think was possible anymore.

"I have loved you for so long, Lando", you whispered once you pulled away for air, "and I couldn't imagine a world where anyone would love me back, let alone you", you admitted, looking into his beautiful orbs.

"You don't have to make any effort to imagine it anymore, baby. I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere. You're so loved and I'll be damned if I don't show you how much everyday of our lives", he smiled, kissing your lips again as your hands travelled to his messy curls.

#lando norris imagine #lando norris fluff #lando norris x reader #lando norris fanfic #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 fanfic #f1 fluff

[prettieinpink]

CREATING A STUDY SCHEDULE/ROUTINE 

PLANNING/SCHEDULING

LIST YOUR ACADEMIC STRENGTHS AND WEAKNESSES. This is so you can allocate time accordingly and avoid wasting any time. 

PRIORITISE ANY SUBJECTS. These may be subjects that will help you in your future career or just a subject you especially want a good grade in. Anything for these subjects then becomes the most important on your to-do list.

DIVIDE TIME EACH DAY. Not all days you are going to be able to sit down at your desk at the same time. Instead, according to your energy levels and planned activities, divide your time.

E.g I have cheerleading after school and I'm going to be so tired, so I’ll do my studying in the morning instead. 

ESTABLISH BREAKS. Depending on how long you can study for, place a suitable break in between. This helps make studying more productive, but only if your breaks are. 

CREATING

USE YOUR TIMETABLE. On days you don’t have a specific subject, dedicate more time to that one. 

CONSIDER YOUR LEARNING STYLE. This helps to be a bit more specific when creating it, instead of winging it and just doing anything. Having a consistent way of studying helps us learn better. 

E.g I’m a visual learner, so I’ll watch animations. I'm an auditory learner so I’ll watch a video of someone explaining it. 

KNOW WHAT YOU WILL DO DURING STUDYING. Do not just wing studying, it’s unproductive and you’re more likely to waste time instead of using it.

 Before you start studying, write a to-do list of everything you need to do during that session and how you will do it. Less time time-consuming and allows you to use time productively. 

SAMPLE – this is Lanny’s daily study routine without any upcoming tests, as an early bird, kinesthetic learner and needs breaks to think with clarity.

Morning

Review my flashcards in preparation for any test. 

Write/note any flashcards I'm struggling with. 

 Afterschool

Check seqta/school website to access my courses, in which I’ll write down which subjects I had. 

Do a few quick blurts on paper of everything I learned in those subjects with prior reading. I only do this for HASS, math and science + any electives that require it. (blurting method)

Then I recheck my blurts, add in anything that I’ve missed and correct with a different coloured pen. 

After, I push those papers aside but I do not discard them. I’ll then complete my online science homework + class workbook. If I happen not to understand anything I’ll watch a video on it and then complete some questions on that. 

I’ll take a break around now because, on an estimate, it has been around 20-40 minutes since I started depending on how my science homework is. I usually eat something and then get back to it. 

Math is next. I’ll complete any math homework, then I’ll practice doing math questions on my own. What I like to do is watch a math video, pause the question without the answer then watch to see if I got it. Effective because they explain it and I can see where I went wrong without analysing my working out which is rather time-consuming. 

I take another break. Math stuff usually takes around 20-30 minutes. 

I then do HASS, which is the easiest. I usually read an article or watch a video on hass then apply that knowledge by answering questions OR doing assigned chapter work. 

I do not study English after school, but I usually read an assigned passage/book and then try to apply any techniques/knowledge by taking that paragraph apart and analysing it. Sometimes, I write my paragraphs using any taught techniques and then mark them. 

Then, I redo my blurtings again but without prior reading then recheck and correct. Then I am finished for the afternoon!!

Evening

Review flashcards then watch a video/read an article on what I was struggling with in the morning but I do not do anything to consolidate this knowledge. 

That is all, please feel free to ask me about any questions about studying as I don't really post much about it, I'll love to help out any fellow students! 

#hot and educated #hot girl semester #pink academia #princess academica #study blog #study aesthetic #studyspo #study motivation #studyblr #study tips #studying #high school #pretty academia #pretty and smart #study #study inspiration #routine #time management #sc

[soulrph]

𝐅𝐀𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐀𝐋/𝐏𝐋𝐀𝐓𝐎𝐍𝐈𝐂 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐏𝐓𝐒.

as requested by a very wonderful, very dear, very lovely friend! i hope you all enjoy using these as much as i enjoyed writing them! i honestly found these so nice and therapeutic to write tho like oml i cannot get over it! DO NOT ADD TO THIS LIST PLEASE! 

“ oh, i knew you could do it! i’m so proud of you! “

“ i’m thinking of doing a movie/game night at my place, if you wanna join in? “

“ how many mugs of coffee have you had today?! that’s enough, now, you go take a nap before you buzz through the ceiling! “

“ i’ll send you the recipe, if you like! but, in the same breath, you should know that i really don’t mind continuing to cook this for you; it’s no trouble at all, really! “

“ are you sure there isn’t anything i can do to help you in the kitchen? “

“ come on in! take a seat! i’ll fix you up a plate, there’s more than enough to go around! “

“ why don’t you spend the night here? really, it’s no trouble to fix up the guest room, and we have plenty of spare pajamas and toiletries if that’s what’s bothering you! “

“ look, i get the whole lone wolf thing, trust me, i do. but... you do understand that there’ll always be a place here for you, don’t you? that door is always open to you, no matter what. that’s a promise. “

“ why don’t i make you a cup of tea, and you can tell me all about it? “

“ [NAME]? hey, hey, hey, what’s the matter? are you okay? what’s wrong? oh, come here... “

“ jeez, i don’t even wanna know how you got that battle wound there; sit down and let me fix it up, won’t you?��“

“ hey, stranger! it’s been a minute, huh? what’ve you been up to? how have you been? hell, where have you been? “

“ now, now, don’t be silly; put that wallet away. i invited you out for dinner, so i’ll pay the bill, right? you can get the next one! “

“ hey, you didn’t order anything! don’t worry about it, huh? here, take half my sandwich; i can never finish the damn thing, anyway, you’re really doing me the favor! and there’s coffee in that flask, so help yourself to that, too! i’ve been trying to cut back, anyhow. “

“ hey, i know it’s really late, but... i didn’t know who else to call. “

“ everything’s gonna be okay, i promise. just tell me where you are, okay? and i’ll come and get you right this second. “

“ well, we have to celebrate your good news! what’s your favorite dinner? oh, and cake! we can’t have a decent celebration without cake, right? “

“ hey, hey, it’s okay, relax. i’m not about to nag you for skipping out on curfew, alright? have you eaten anything? because i saved you a plate, and it’s in the oven if you want it. “

“ now, now, none of that self-hate talk! we all have bad days, right? we all mess up sometimes and make silly mistakes. but it doesn’t matter at the end of the day; it just makes the good days all the better! “

“ guess who has an extra ticket for the concert this weekend! wanna come with me? they’re practically front row! “

“ you’re still coming over for dinner tonight, right? “

“ hey! what are your plans for the holidays? because, if you didn’t have any, i have an offer for you! or an open invitation! “

“ did you do something different with your hair? it looks amazing! “

“ oh my god, where have you been?! i was so worried about you! are you okay? did you get hurt?! “

“ we should go out tonight! come on, you can ransack my wardrobe if you like! i have a friend who’s the bouncer at that new night club, they can get us in for free! “

“ i made you some breakfast, if you’re hungry? it’s your favorite! unless you’ve got a new favorite, in which case... “

“ don’t forget to take an umbrella! “

“ let me know when you get there so i know you’re safe, okay? “

“ i watched that show you recommended last week! it was so good! can you believe that season finale, though? “

“ rough night, huh? i know that feeling. here, help yourself; the coffee is fresh, and the waffles are pretty damn good today, if i do say so myself! “

“ i knew you’d forget yours, so i brought extra. go ahead, help yourself! “

“ you’re welcome to stay for as long as you like. what’s mine is yours, okay? you don’t need to ask permission, just take whatever you want. “

“ you should get some sleep, okay? my room is just down the hall if you need anything. “

“ you don’t need to be so polite around here, you know! help yourself; i don’t bite! “

“ hey now, never apologize for feeling emotions, okay? humans are meant to feel all this stuff, no matter how good or bad the feelings are. besides; shoulders are built to be cried on! “

“ you should keep that sweater! it looks much better on you than it does on me; brings out your eyes! “

“ i never realized you could cook! the apron suits you very nicely! “

“ if you don’t have any plans this weekend, we should do something together! “

“ remember, if you want to leave early, just call me and i’ll come get you, okay? “

“ would you come on in inside out of that rain?! you’ll catch your death! “

“ don’t worry about it, okay? no apologies necessary; just breathe, everything’s good. “

“ it’s okay! no use crying over spilt milk, am i right? fetch me that mop and i’ll clean it up; you should find a clean shirt in the third drawer in my room, too! “

“ here, grab a plate; i made your favorite, and there’s more than enough for you to have seconds and take home a tonne of leftovers, too! “

“ would you mind setting the table for me while i finish up in the kitchen? “

“ you want some hot cocoa before you go to bed? i’m more than happy to have one with you; not to praise myself or anything, but my hot cocoa is the best in town! “

“ you did it! oh, congratulations! quick, i’m gonna fetch the sparkling cider, and then i’ll book a table somewhere fancy; we’re going to celebrate in style! “

“ oh god, you’re burning up a fever, you poor thing! here, lie down, let’s get you some water and a nice cool cloth, huh? “

“ how are you feeling? i thought you might be hungry, so i made some tea and toast. “

“ i thought i might find you out here... this must be your favorite spot, huh? it’s nice! “

“ how are you? and be real with me, now; i can tell when you’re not being honest with me. you’ve got a tell. “

“ figured you might be needing an extra blanket in this weather. you mind if i sit with you for a while? “

“ let’s go for a walk, huh? i know this place that does the best coffee you’ll ever have! “

“ i can’t believe you’ve never seen this movie before! we have to fix this immediately; you get the popcorn, i’ll order in the pizza and get the tv set up. “

“ wow... that pun was so awful, it actually became good again. nicely done! “

“ i know you have that meeting today, so i thought i’d come wish you luck. and give you my lucky socks! “

“ hey! i hope you’re hungry, i spared you some waffles and pancakes from breakfast this morning! “

“ maybe you’re not ready to talk just now. but i want you to know that, whenever you are, my door is always open to you. understand? “

“ i’m not here to say i told you so, don’t worry. i’m not that cruel. i’m just here to comfort my friend. “

“ you’re here so often, i figured it was about time you had your very own mug! “

“ do you mind if i put you down as my emergency contact? “

“ you should move in with me! i have a spare room, the rent is cheap, it’s closer to work... i mean, only if you want to, but i’m very much in favor of this! “

“ i know that things haven’t been easy for you lately, so... i was thinking, maybe we could plan a little vacation together? “

“ pull the car over, alright? you can get some sleep in the back seat, and i’ll take over the driving. “

“ woah, woah, woah... slow it down a few miles, huh? what’s going on? where’s the fire? “

“ do you want a hug? i give some really good hugs; i nearly got voted the best hug-giver in the continent, once! come on, you know you want to! “

“ hey! so i’m after having a really crappy day. you wanna get take-out and watch a movie at my place tonight? “

“ i remember you saying you didn’t like this ingredient last time, so i fixed you up something else. “

#rp meme #roleplay meme #rp prompt #roleplay prompts #roleplay prompt #sentence starters #sentence starter #found family sentence starters #dialogue prompt #dialogue prompts #writing prompt #writing prompts

[fluentmoviequoter]

Merry and Bright

Day 9 of 12 Days of Ficmas

Pairing: Tim Bradford x fem!reader (The Rookie)

Summary: You invite Tim over on Christmas Eve, but he says he's working. A Christmas miracle occurs and Tim knocks on your door, presents in tow.

Word Count: 1.4k+ words

Warnings: so much fluff. How the Grinch Stole Christmas references. Tim is probably OOC. I made up some stuff about Tim and his sister.

A/N: I haven't written for Tim Bradford yet, so please feel free to leave feedback and let me know what you think! I'd like to keep writing for him and try to capture his amazing character better so please feel free to send requests if you have any!

Masterlist Directory | Request Info (& full fandom list)

Since you inserted yourself into Tim’s life, barging your way in with a basket of goodies after moving in next door, he has quickly become one of your best friends. If he’s undeniably handsome and one of the most caring men you’ve ever met despite his grumpy exterior, so what? You asked yourself that the first time you invited him over for dinner, but now it’s a weekly occurrence, and it is your week to cook.

Your favorite one-pan dish is in the oven, and the game is queued on your television, but all that’s missing is Tim Bradford. As you decorated for Christmas this year, you thought about him and how his sister isn’t coming to LA for the holidays, leaving him alone. You’ve since decided to do something about that.

“Anyone home?” Tim asks as he opens your door. “Because I know I’ve told you more times than I can count to lock your door.”

You look around the corner and smile at him as you argue, “My neighbor’s a cop, it’ll be fine.”

“Sergeant, not a cop.”

“My apologies, Sergeant Bradford.”

He smiles at you, less rare than it used to be, but a moment you take the time to appreciate, never knowing when he will grace you with another one.

“So, I know your sister isn’t visiting,” you begin, “and I was wondering if you’d be interested in spending Christmas here?”

Tim glances at your Christmas tree before answering. “I would love to, and I can’t thank you enough for thinking of me and offering, but I’m working Christmas Eve.”

“Okay,” you say, nodding as you smile. “I just wanted to extend the invitation.”

You turn around to remove dinner from the oven, and Tim places a hand on your arm, stopping you.

“Thank you,” he repeats quietly and bordering on reverent. “I really appreciate it.”

“Of course. You’re always welcome here.”

“I’m sorry. I would come if I could.”

“Tim, it’s fine. I’ll just have to give you your giant stack of gifts later,” you tease.

Tim nods, removing his hand from your arm and watching you turn away, his heart trying to decide whether it wants to shrink or grow.

✯✯✯✯✯

“Bradford, are you good?” Wade asks as he leaves the station.

“Fantastic,” he mumbles. Wade looks at him, unconvinced, and he sighs before saying, “I just wish I could be somewhere else. I’m glad I could help out the officers with families, with kids, and give them the night off, but…”

“You’re regretting it?” Wade finishes.

“Not exactly.”

“Well, if you want to come over when you get off, we’ll leave the lights on,” Wade offers.

“Thanks,” Tim says. He doesn’t add: I’ve got somewhere else I’d rather be.

Someone walks up behind Tim and places a Santa hat on his head.

“Cheer up, Grinchy,” Angela calls, walking out of the station. “Merry Christmas, Tim!”

“Yeah,” Tim says, more to himself than her.

“Dude, we need to find you a K9 named Max, finish off the Grinch look,” Aaron teases, sitting next to Tim as his shift begins. He’s working tonight for the same reason Tim is: to let the officers with families spend Christmas with their loved ones.

“Oh, should we get him a little heart pin, too, and try to make it grow?” Nolan chimes in.

“Sorry, Bradford, but you’re just so… Grinchy,” Aaron says.

Tim laughs, shaking his head as the Santa hat shifts with his movement. Nolan and Aaron look at each other in horror and amusement at the fact that Tim Bradford, who is wearing a Santa hat, just laughed. Tim, however, is only thinking of you and how you’d absolutely agree with them. Although, if you were here, or if he was with you, he wouldn’t be quite so Grinchy.

“Merry Christmas, LAPD!” Officer Jan announces, entering the station in a full Santa costume. “I have come to relieve one lucky soul of Christmas Eve duty.”

“Bradford!” Aaron and Nolan yell. “He has somewhere to be.”

“How do you-?” Tim asks.

“It’s all over your face,” Aaron says as Nolan answers, “Go get her… whoever she is.”

Tim looks at Jan, who nods encouragingly. Tim jumps to his feet and runs to his locker. He’s heading home for Christmas, but he has one stop. As he changes before climbing in his truck, he makes a mental list of everything he needs. Merry Christmas to all, Tim thinks.

✯✯✯✯✯

You smile at the ending of the Christmas movie on your television, your thoughts drifting to Tim as you wonder what it would be like to have him here. As you try to focus on the movie again, someone knocks on your door.

When you open it, you don’t expect to see Tim in a Santa hat and holding several gift bags. Your eyes widen, and your smile returns as you let him in, closing the door behind him. He opens his mouth to say something, but you wrap your arms around his shoulders and hug him tightly before he gets the chance. His arms wrap around you, loosely at first, before tightening when a Christmas song begins playing through your speakers as the credits roll. 

“I brought gifts,” he says against your shoulder.

“You didn’t have to. I just wanted to see you,” you reply.

He squeezes you once more, and you slowly step back, pulling out of the hug and looking up into Tim’s eyes.

“You brought hot chocolate?” you ask, stealing a peek into one of the bags.

“It’s Christmas,” he answers, as if it’s obvious.

“Didn’t take you for the sentimental type.”

“I’m not always.”

You smile and gesture for him to follow you, leading him into the kitchen and pulling two Christmas-themed mugs from your cupboard.

“Thank you for coming,” you tell him.

“Thanks for inviting me.”

✯✯✯✯✯

After making the hot chocolate, you return to the couch and turn on A Charlie Brown Christmas as you resist leaning into Tim’s side.

“This is one of my favorites,” he says quietly, “my sister and I watched it every time it was on cable growing up.”

“It’s a classic,” you agree.

“We would watch it, drink hot cocoa or cider, whatever was in the kitchen, and exchange one gift on Christmas Eve,” Tim adds.

“Do you want to open a gift?” you ask, facing him. “There’s only a few hours until Christmas anyway.”

Tim thinks for a moment and then smiles at you. “Just one.”

You stand, retrieving a small box from under the tree while he pulls a gift from one of the bags. When you sit back down, you sit a little closer than before. He opens his present first, smiling and leaning in to hug you as he thanks you. When you open yours, you see a gift you’ve wanted for years but no one ever remembered. You start to thank him, but something happens along the way, and instead, your lips land on his. His hand raises to your arm as he reciprocates, but you realise your mistake (was it really a mistake? you ask yourself) and pull back.

“I’m sorry,” you say.

His hand slides up your arm to rest at the back of your neck. You see a new smile as he pulls you back in. Pressing your hand against his chest, you stop yourself.

“Are you sure?” you whisper.

“Have you ever seen me so merry and bright?” he asks, his smile the widest you’ve ever seen.

You pick up the pompom at the end of his Santa hat and chuckle. “You are pretty cuddly,” you reply, noticing his other arm has wrapped around your waist. 

He rolls his eyes, still smiling as he kisses you again. You shift backward, your hand landing on the remote and resuming the movie. Tim laughs as he pulls back, pulling you against him.

“How’d you get off work?” you ask.

“Jan came in and offered to cover for one of us, and I was volunteered because I was being too ‘Grinchy.’”

You gasp in faux surprise. “Tim Bradford? You? Grinchy? I can’t imagine it.”

He smiles, and you lean in to kiss him again, your new favorite pastime.

“Thank you for coming. This is the best Christmas ever,” you say against his lips.

“Until next year?” Tim asks.

“What happens next year?”

“We’ll see.”

“And for now we’re merry and bright?” you respond.

“The merriest and the brightest,” Tim jokes, pulling you against his side as Charlie Brown appears on screen.

Merry and Bright, indeed.

#fluentmoviequoter12daysoffics #tim bradford x reader #tim bradford fluff #tim bradford imagine #tim bradford x you #tim bradford #tim bradford the rookie #the rookie

[romanoffsbish]

A Prompt List

Feel free to pick and choose from the list for your own stories, as well as send in requests (view my masterlist for who I write for) with whatever prompts if you please, 🥰

Angst/Fluff/Smut prompts listed. (18+)

Bonus points if you take the assigned genre and flip it 🤔😏

———

Angst

“Are you serious?” / “I never wanted this!”

“This was never real, was it?” / “I was just a warm body for those cold winter nights…”

“You are vile…” / “I can’t believe I ever believed someone like you could love me.”

“Nothing good ever lasts.” / “Goodbye.”

“I love you.” / “It’s not enough this time.”

“Please, don’t leave me, we can fix this.” /“You left me first, I’m just finishing the job.”

“I love you Y/N.” / “Why do people only say that to me when they’ve wronged me? Am I not deserving of the guiltless love? Like the ones I see in fairytales, where they get swept away smiling, and not where I curl up to weep in my bed for another damn night.”

“I’m sorry.” / “For what exactly? Breaking my trust, and in turn my fragile heart? Or do you only mean that you got caught?”

“I can’t even look at you anymore.” / “Please…” / “This is the end for us.”

“I can’t live without you, I won’t survive.” / “Then I guess I’ll be back for your funeral.”

Fluff

“There’s nobody else I’d ever love like this.”

“Everything I do is for you—my beloved.”

*while stargazing* “If I could, I’d rearrange the stars for you, have them map out your face, because a beauty like yours should transcend the bounds of Earth my darling.”

“I can’t believe that the world had infinite chances to find me a soulmate, and I lucked out and hit the absolute jackpot with you.”

“Did you know that a kiss is worth a thousand words?” / “You should kiss me.”

“You’re the most gorgeous person here.” / “I’d never lie to you darling, god, I wish you could see you the way I do” / “Perfect.”

“Call them —, the worst they could do is say no to you, and trust me, they won’t…” / “They said yes!!!”

“I’ve loved you since the first time I ever laid my eyes on you.” / “Well damn, why’s it taken you so long to make a move then?”

“I can’t believe my cat/dog loves you more than it’s ever loved me.” / “Actually, on second thought it makes sense, you’re far too lovable to even question it; *pets name* you have good taste.”

“I will never tire of watching you sleeping next to me, you’re just so peaceful, and I get to celebrate that you’re all mine.”

Smut

“Careful what you wish for baby, because I’m nothing if not generous…”

“Where should I sit?” / “The couch works just fine, but if you prefer comfort, my face works far better my darling.”

“I’m not letting you go until you’ve either drenched the sheets, or passed out.”

“Fuck me like you mean it —, let everybody know I’m yours before I no longer am.”

“Aww, did my precious little dove think I’d just let that little stunt go?” / “I was hoping so.” / “You’re sadly mistaken toots, now prepare yourself for a long night full of passion, and if you’re lucky—pain.”

“Mommy isn’t very pleased with the outfit you chose to wear tonight, you made those fools think they stood a chance.” / “Maybe they did.” / *incredulous laughter* “Is that right baby? I go on one week long business trip and you just forget who you belong to? Don’t worry sweetheart, I’ll remind you.”

“Stay still, or I’ll have you warming daddy’s cock all night long.” / “That’s a good girl.”

“I-I can’t take anymore, please.” / “You can take it, and you’ll do it graciously, one more complaint and I’ll edge you all month.”

“Kiss me, please.” / “Is that all you want baby, is for me to kiss you?” / “N-no, I also want you to fuck me senseless, but a kiss sounded far more romantic.”

“If you don’t fuck me, I’ll be doing it myself!” / “I’m coming!” / “No, I am!”

#angst prompt #angst prompts #angsty prompts #writing prompt #writing prompts #fluff prompt #fluff prompts #fluffy prompts #smut prompts #smutty prompts

[bitbugbites-re]

𝙳𝙰𝙼𝚂𝙴𝙻 // 𝔠𝔞𝔯𝔩𝔬𝔰 𝔬𝔩𝔦𝔳𝔢𝔦𝔯𝔞 𝔵 𝔯𝔢𝔞𝔡𝔢𝔯

As summer comes to an end, you’re desperate to get some pool time in while you still can. However, since it’s now October, you’re pretty much out of luck. Luckily for you, there’s an indoor pool at the Y. Not to mention, it comes along with a cute pool boy!

a03 link

word count: ~8.6k

gender: fem! reader

cw: NSFW, FLUFF // drowning // ktober

a/n: literally supposed to be reading the bible for class rn but god be damned, this lady knows how to write erotic fiction !!!

p.s. -- if you're only interested in the smut, you can scroll down until you reach the thin black bar lololol

You’re not crazy. You just want to swim.

Frowning, you stared down your phone as you read the most recent messages from your friends. They were replying to the flurry of texts you had just sent.

The first response read: “Girl. Lol.”

The next was: “You didn’t think about this in September???”

And the last response wasn’t even a response. It was a TikTok link leading to a video about things to do while in Vegas. You didn’t even live in Vegas. You’re on the East Coast.

You sighed, placing the phone down for a second before popping a Keurig cup into the proper machine, waiting for it to finish warming the water. When the buttons lit up, you pressed 12oz and leaned over the counter, one of your hands resting on your cheek. With your free hand, you picked your phone back up and re-read your initial texts as you listened to the liquid pour a straight line into your mug.

“u guys”

“I wanted to go swimming at least once this summer but I forgot”

“do u think there are any pools still open??? I don’t even care if its cold im desperate”

Yeah, so maybe you are a little crazy after all. It was October, and there was no way that even one pool would be open. You felt a little defeated, your desperation morphing into disappointment. Suddenly, the whirring of the Keurig slowed before spitting out the last bits of bitterly strong tea, a burning droplet jumping out and landing on your hand. You wondered if that was the Keurig’s way of calling you crazy as well.

Shaking your hand before wiping it with the opposite sleeve of your shirt, you stood up straight and leaned your back against the counter. With your phone in hand, you tapped out a string of shushing emojis in the group chat. Fuck it. You’re crazy and you’re proud.

You then pressed the video on, “Fun Things To Do In Vegas” which was accompanied by three exclamation points and a couple of emojis with their tongues out. The emojis implication almost made you a little scared of what “things” were going to be listed in the TikTok.

Before you could actually watch the video, though, a notification from your group chat popped up. It was from the friend who sent the Vegas video – they likely just now actually read the chat.

“Claire: Wait, what about the YMCA near your house? Doesn’t it have an indoor pool? Probably not the same kind of swimming that u were thinking of, but it’d be swimming lol.”

Oh shit. That’s a good idea. – Is what you both thought and simultaneously typed in response. Not missing a beat, you opened the search engine app on your phone and looked up the YMCA closest to you. Just under the images (which mostly consisted of it’s pool, oddly enough), you noticed that it was open from 5 A.M. to 9 P.M. 

It was only 6:30 P.M. right now. Meaning, it was still open.

You switched back to the group chat’s tab and typed away.

“guess who’s going to the pool tonight”

“(it’s me)”

“anyone wanna come with?”

Surprisingly, the responses flooded in pretty quickly. They said:

“Claire: I wish, but I’ve got a class in an hour. I knew it was a bad decision to pick a class at 7 at night smh. Can’t ever meet up with u guys on weekends anymore :/”

“Ada: Can’t. Lots of work. Maybe next time.”

“Jill: Sorry, I’m at work right now. Had to pick up my coworker’s shift again. How about on the weekend?”

You groaned out a whine, throwing a mini-tantrum. You didn’t really want to go alone, because what fun would that be? Nonetheless, you didn’t want to wait for the weekend either. It was rare you guys ever actually had the same schedule, so you were sure the plans would just end up getting canceled or be pushed back even further. You’d just have to go alone. 

You typed out a message informing your friends of your plan before placing the phone down with a heavy hand. Dragging your way down the narrow hall to your room, you plopped yourself down on your knees, opening up the dresser drawer that stored your bathing suits. You had an idea of which one you were going to wear, as it was a black one-piece with a deep-wired V down the front – It was appealing in the way that it wasn’t too revealing, but not unattractively modest either. Perfect for a venue that was family-friendly and not as free as the beach.

After a couple of minutes of rummaging, you slumped down to a hunch and huffed. You couldn’t seem to find the swimsuit. Not even after pulling out each bathing suit one by one. You searched, and searched, and searched, but it was nowhere to be found. 

You caved to your frustration and picked out a bikini instead. You didn’t have any other swimsuits, so it was either a simplistic bikini or nothing. And after all that hullabaloo in the group chat, you were not choosing nothing.

Changing quickly, you then grabbed your things and headed for the car. It was now already after 6:45 P.M., and you were running out of time before the Y would close.

Soon enough, you were turning your car wheel to pull into the YMCA’s parking lot. You found a spot fairly fast and quickly put the car in park, removing your keys from the hole with a twist and pull of the wrist. As the car’s engine whirred, shutting off, you observed the parking lot. You noticed there weren’t too many cars. Hopefully, most of the people would be in the gym or another section of the Y and not the pool, you thought to yourself.

Stepping out of your car, you held onto the handle as you got dusted in the face by the wind, your hair flinging all over the place. The wind was pretty bad, but the chill alone was enough for you to huddle your arms over your body before running into the building. You were starting to regret coming to the pool so late in the day, especially in October, nonetheless. At least the air smelled nice, though; there must’ve been a place nearby having a bonfire, as there was a heavy waft of burning wood.

You pulled the heavy glass door open, practically swinging it with all your might, and walked in heaving. Maybe you should be going to the gym instead of the pool – how could you be out of breath from only a short jog across the parking lot?

No matter, you walked up to the counter and paid for a day pass. You got to go in free since you’re a first-time visitor, although you felt a little guilty considering it was going to be wasted on a less than two-hour excursion. It was probably fine though – you don’t think you’d need to go to the Y again after this, anyway.

Walking through the building, you admired the decorative furniture and monotone walls contrasted with bright accent walls and signs. It had a clean, modern look and you were pretty impressed by how well-kept it was; it must’ve been hard for the janitors who worked there considering it was a pretty big community establishment. You appreciated how spotless they were able to keep it with this knowledge in mind.

Soon, you found your way to the pool after getting lost and asking a very tired-looking staff member. You almost felt bad interrupting them – their dark undereye mixed with the lighting made them look as if they were ready to be taken out back and put down. Not that you blame them – they must’ve been here for a while now. You were sure you’d look like that too if you had to work until nine at night.

As you pushed the door to the pool open, you were immediately exposed to the hot, humid air. Typical of a pool. You had to admit, though, it felt pretty good as compared to the cold breeze outside. Besides, you probably wouldn’t feel this type of heat again unless you decided to put your heater on full blast in winter. Although that would turn your room into what was practically an oven and not a fun chlorine-smelling paradise – so maybe it wasn’t the same after all.

You observed the area, your eyes immediately landing on the few kids splashing around in the middle of the pool. Great. In situations like these, you tend to sit on the side of the stairs to the pool – but that spot seemed to be occupied by a group of older men and women, so you crossed that option off. You didn’t feel like getting dragged into a conversation about retirement homes, or grandchildren, or…stuff. You weren’t really sure what the elderly chatted about.

Admitting defeat, you decided to just go sit on one of the pool chairs instead. You figured you’d just wait it out, betting that both the kids and the elderly wouldn’t stay for much longer. It was almost pitch-black outside, and seeing both children and old people at night was practically like spotting a leprechaun next to a pot of gold, you thought.

As soon as you sat and plopped your stuff down in the middle-most chair, you took in a breath and looked around. And that’s when you saw him.

You swore your heart stopped beating for a second. He was gorgeous. 

Most of the men you came across on a day-to-day basis looked downright horrendous, dressed in sweats and backward caps with dumb labels like “GymRat,” so to see a fit man with a haircut that suited his looks and facial scruff that looked like it was actively trimmed was like seeing that your younger sibling didn’t pick all of the marshmallows out of your favorite cereal and eat them. A blessing, that’s what this is, you thought.

You figured he was the lifeguard, as he was sitting in the lifeguard’s chair, leaning back with one leg dangling and the other using his heel to support his placement on the seat. He had one arm lazing on the armrest, while the other held his tilted head in place as he watched the kids dash up waves of water at one another. Every once in a while, his lips would curve into an amused smile, and he’d shake his black curls out of his face, eyes not straying from the children at play. Cute, you thought.

Watching him for a while longer, you noticed three things about him:

His eyes stayed trained on the kids in the pool, not the elderly. Every once in a while, if they made a sudden movement, he’d sit up, as if he were ready to leap from the tall chair at a moment's notice.

He seemed to be pretty proud of his body, or at least his looks. His posture was confident in nature and he never covered up any part of his body with his arms. 

He had a charismatic personality, or at the very least, was on good terms with the janitors. Every time they passed by, he’d quickly turn his head, see who it was, and make a comment of some sort. He always had a grin on his face as he did, and never showed a bit of discourtesy nor dislike, even if the janitor didn’t return the energy.

Of course, those weren’t the only things you noticed about him. You also noticed he had a great body. Did you mention he had a great body? He had a great body.

He didn’t even need to be shirtless for you to tell. His arms and thighs were fat with muscle, his calves fit for a marathon runner, and his chest with mounds big enough that you wouldn’t be surprised if he knew how to flex them one at a time, as a kind of party trick.

You also could tell that he was a pretty hairy guy, not that you were complaining. You liked that in a man. You wondered what it would feel like to run your hands down his arm as his legs brushed up against the skin of–

And then he looked in your direction. He saw you. As you were at your apex of wanting to eat him alive.

Your face burned with embarrassment as his eyes met yours, and before you made a fool out of yourself, you looked away. Grabbing your phone which now felt sticky from the humidity, you pulled up the group chat, pretending to be busy. 

“guys”

“there’s a rly cute lifeguard here and he caught me staring”

“im so embarrassed”

You stared at the screen for a while, waiting for your friends to respond, but none came.

Damn. Why is it that whenever you need a distraction, no one is active?

It didn’t take long after for you to give up, slinking your phone back down. You picked up a book instead, sneakily glancing up at the lifeguard once more to see if he was still looking your way. He wasn’t. His eyes were trained back on the kids, which surprisingly, made you feel a little disappointed.

You read for a while until eventually, you received a notification. 

“Ada: Lol. You have a crush?”

“Ada: You should go up to him.”

The longer you considered Ada’s suggestion, the more your heart raced. You seriously considered it for a moment, but abruptly shut it down after thinking about how weird it actually might be.

“I can’t do that”

“I don’t even know what I’d say”

Ada replied almost immediately.

“Ada: Then make him want to go up to you.”

It wasn’t bad advice. You thought about it for a bit, staring at the paved concrete below your pool chair. An ant scurried on by, passing your left foot, and once it was out of sight, you snapped out of your daze and returned your head to a forward position.

Once you did, you noticed the lifeguard’s gaze on you. He was looking at you first this time.

As soon as your eyes met, he flung his head to the side, pretending to rub his neck. It was pretty awkward to watch, as his hands moved aimlessly and unpurposeful, as there was really no physical reason for him to need to touch his neck. It was easy to tell that he was only doing it to play off the fact that he was caught staring, too.

His attraction – or at the very least, interest, was mutual, then. You felt a fire of confidence rising in your chest, and you now knew how you’d get him to come up to you first.

You stood up from your chair, keeping him in your peripheral view, pretending to dust yourself off before seeing his head move back in your direction. Good, he was watching you again.

Very slowly, you began to remove the regular clothes that rested atop your bikini. Once fully stripped to your swimsuit, you made sure to fold your clothes neatly. After each article was folded, you would bend over, your behind facing his direction, placing it flatly onto the pool chair. Each time you did this, you couldn’t tell if he was looking, but you were sure that he wouldn’t have been able to resist at minimum, a glance.

Once done, you began to walk towards the water. You felt a little conscious in your stride, your step heavy, but also determined to play it cool. When approaching the stairs of the pool, you grabbed onto the accompanying handlebar, creating a divide in the water as you were further submerged. You passed the elderly group, and once they thought you were out of earshot, one exclaimed, “I wish I still had a young body like that.” The others chuckled, agreeing with the notion. You blushed and continued your journey to an empty spot in the pool.

Wading through the water, you then came up near the area where the kids were playing. You went to the side opposite the lifeguard’s chair and leaned against the wall. It was a little noisy – no, very noisy being near the kids. On top of that, you were occasionally hit with splatters of water every time they tried to mimic professional swimmers, but at least your plan was working. You think. 

You weren’t really sure because you were too scared to look back up at the lifeguard. But that’s OK. All girlbosses have their weak moments.

While lost in thought trying to figure out your next step on alluring the lifeguard (as, for some reason, he wasn’t already proposing marriage and offering a bride-dowry to your parents consisting of 400 sheep, 200 goats, fifty pieces of silver, a years’ worth of unleavened bread, and seven years’ labor), you noticed two children playing roughly, one a bone-thin blonde, and the other a brunette missing one of his front teeth. 

The blonde child was in a small floaty, laughing as his friend tried to swim under the tube and get inside of it with him. Every time he dived under the water, the boy would swerve his donut-shaped float, swimming a few inches away, laughing. This went on for a while, until eventually, the blonde boy switched his tactic and began pushing his friend’s head away from his float while under the water.

You grew concerned as you watched, knowing they were starting to get a little too carried away, and you looked around for their parents. You then spotted a couple of adults on the pool chairs near the towel rack, busy conversing about something you couldn’t hear. You weren’t sure what to do and turned your head back to the kids, and then there was a stifled thump.

Your heart started to race as the blonde boy started to look worried, noticing his friend wasn’t coming up out of the water. You noticed what was happening when the child leaned over his tube, holding his reddened elbow, freezing in place.

The toothless boy was knocked out.

The child with scrawny arms somehow managed to deal a blow hard enough for his friend to lose consciousness. He whipped his head around to get the lifeguard’s attention, desperately screaming, “Help! Help!” 

The lifeguard was already halfway down the chair even before the boy started yelling. It seemed like his gaze had been so focused on the children earlier because he knew something like this was bound to happen.

The child was now sobbing, looking around for his parents, of which the whole group was now running over to see what the commotion was about.

You saw the kid whose body started to sink downwards, your heartbeat stammering in your chest.

You had to do something.

Launching yourself forward, you began to swim to the child nearby. As you did, you heard the lifeguard jump in the pool, a loud splash of water mixing in with the cries of the children’s parents. 

You made it to the boy under the water first, diving straight down. Once you got a hold of him, you yanked his arm up, pulled him to your body, and positioned his behind on your arm, so that his head would immediately be above the water. 

Both of you came up, and you gasped for air, blinking rapidly so that you could see. The lifeguard was right next to you, hurriedly taking the boy from your arms, rushing him toward the edge of the pool, and plopping him down on the concrete. You followed over, as did pretty much everyone at the pool, watching the lifeguard push desperately at his chest.

After a short while, which actually felt like forever, the boy gasped, throwing up the water that was in his lungs. The lifeguard helped the boy sit up a little, rubbing his back as he continued his violent coughs and sobs. “It’s okay, it’s okay,” he whispered. “I got’cha, bud.”

Once the brunette had finally gotten a hold of himself, he ran to his parents, who held him and began petting his head. The other parents, who seemed to all be friends, began thanking the lifeguard profusely on both the boy's and his parent’s behalf.

The lifeguard was crouched, slightly hunched over, breathing heavily, simply shaking his head to assure them it was okay. “Just doin’ my job,” he smiled despite the apparent stress on his face, “Actually, you should be thanking the kind lady over there.” 

His gaze moved from the worry-stricken parents to you. “She’s the one who saved his life.” 

You blushed, your eyes moving from him, then to the parents, not sure what to say. You didn’t think you did that much. 

The parents came up to you and began thanking you as well, telling you how brave it was of you to dive in after the boy. You were only able to stammer out a couple of “it’s no problem’s” and “thank you’s” in return.

Soon, almost everyone left the pool, deciding they had witnessed enough of the pool for the night. Even the group of elderly packed their things and headed towards the changing room. 

You too had figured it was probably time to go, forgetting your entire plan of romancing the man who had just previously given you all the credit when he was the one to bring the boy back from unconsciousness.

However, as you turned and began walking back to your stuff, the lifeguard ran up to your side, trying to get your attention. “Hey, hey.” 

You turned to face him, stopping in place. “Um–yes?” you said, a little taken aback at his greeting, not expecting him to have started a conversation.

“Ah–oh,” he said, tripping on his words. “I just wanted to thank you, for saving the kid.”

You smiled at his words. “Sure,” you said. You then tilted your head, quirking a brow. “I didn’t really do much, though. You did more than me, so–”

He quickly cut you off, a tint of excitement in his voice. “No, no! If you hadn’t gotten him out, he would’ve been under even longer. Every second matters–you saved his life. I only got the water ‘outta his airway.”

You blushed a little at his enthusiasm for your act of heroism. “Well, uh, thank you–”

“You were so cool,” he said, and you swore you felt your heart explode.“Thanks,” you mumbled out, and soon enough, silence grew between the two of you. You were trying to figure out what to say back.

“Well, I should–” the lifeguard started to say, turning his body to leave. You scrambled for a response back, not wanting him to go.

“You were cool, too.” You said, your voice sounding a little wobbly. You felt your face start to grow red, your blood rising in degrees with every millisecond that passed.

The lifeguard seemed shy now, too, raising an arm behind his head, rubbing at his neck like he did earlier. “Oh–really?”

“Y-yeah,” you breathed out.

There was silence once more before the lifeguard laughed a little and held out his hand to you. “I’m Carlos. It’s nice to meet ‘ya, Phelps.”

You took his hand, shaking it gently. He had a good handshake, and his hand felt huge in your own. “Phelps?” you said, not really understanding why he was referring to you as that.

“You know, Michael Phelps? The swimmer guy? Because you dove in to get the kid?”

You let out a long “ooooooh” as soon as you recognized what he was talking about, and laughed in response. “Pretty rude to call a lady Michael Phelps, dont’cha think?”

He laughed back before running his hand through his hair – which, miraculously, was able to stay dry since you were the one to reach the kid underwater. “Sorry, pretty lady. What should I call you then?”

You blushed a little upon hearing him call you “pretty lady,” a cheeky grin growing on your face. “You can call me Y/N. Or pretty lady, too. I don’t mind either.”

He laughed, shaking his head in an amused manner. He placed his hands on his hips, and tilted his head back a little, grinning. “Okay, pretty lady. How old are you? You in college?”

You nodded your head. “Yeah. What about you?”

“Yep. I’m a senior. You?”

You replied, and from there, your conversation began to take off. You talked about things as small as favorite colors, to medium things like what your majors were, to big things like how many dogs were too many dogs for a person to have. You both seemed to click really well, and you had to admit, you had never met someone as easy to talk to before Carlos.

As you both started passionately debating on whether or not the pool slide was white or beige, an announcement sounded over the speakers.

“Attention guests, the YMCA will be closing in five minutes. Please make sure to gather all your things and head to the exit. Those who are still in the building after closing will be escorted outside by staff. Thank you for choosing the YMCA, and we hope to see you again soon!”

You and Carlos looked at one another, not sure what to say. 

You realized then, that all this time, you’d been keeping Carlos from leaving when he probably could’ve packed up early for the night. Embarrassed, you jumped up from where you both had been sitting. At some point during your conversation (before its interruption), you both had sat at the edge of the pool, your legs resting in the water.

“Shit, I’m sorry for keeping you–” you said. “I’ll go get my things so you can leave–I’m so sorry–”

As you turned in a hurry to go get your stuff, you felt Carlos’ hand rest on your shoulder, stopping you. “Hey, hey–you’re fine, you’re fine.”

You jumped a little at the contact, your face turning red, and once you turned to face Carlos, you noticed he had realized what he had done.

You were wearing a swimsuit. You had on practically next to nothing. And he, a stranger, was touching you.

He pulled his hand back, going to rub his neck, but pausing as he began to raise it. It seemed like he didn’t know what to do with himself now. “Uh–”

“Sorry, shit–I didn’t mean to–uh,” he stumbled. “Was that weird?”

You took in a deep breath and averted your gaze. “No. No, you’re fine.”

“Are–are you sure?” he pushed.

“Yes, yes, you’re fine. Don’t worry.”

“Well, I’m worrying. You can tell me if–”

You sighed and looked him in his eyes. “It’s fine. I liked it.”

Upon hearing the words come out of your mouth, you froze. Your frustration with his reluctance to accept your assurance must have gotten to you, as you didn’t mean to say the last part. 

“You liked it?” he said. He seemed a little surprised, with a mix of something else. You weren’t quite sure what.

“Um. Yeah–yeah.” you asserted. And then there was silence again.

Unable to take the awkward tension, you cracked a joke. “I’m flattered by your desperation to keep me from leaving. Very, uh–flattering touch.”

Turns out you weren’t very good at jokes.

Nonetheless, he seemed to like it. He chuckled a little, which made your heartbeat increase in pace. He seemed to have good humor even in cringy situations. You liked that.

“Well, I’m glad you’re flattered, at least. I’d do it again if I needed to.” He smiled.

You blushed, and that’s when your mouth started to move on its own. “Then do it.”

“What?” he said, a little surprised.

“I’m on my way to leave. The building closes in…” You checked the clock on the wall. “...a minute or less. If you don’t want me to leave, then touch me again.” You looked up at him expectantly.

He paused for a minute and it was clear he was debating on what to do. You waited, watching him shift in place – going to rub his neck again, as he had been doing whenever he was nervous.

Suddenly, it was 9 P.M. and the announcement over the loudspeaker played, declaring it was closing time and all the guests who hadn’t left yet needed to begin their way on exiting the building. Your heart dropped a little, taking his lack of response before the loudspeaker’s interjection as a “no.”

You smiled weakly, taking the hint. You turned to grab your things off the pool chair and spoke. “Well, it was nice to–”

In a heartbeat, he grabbed your shoulder with a sense of determination, spinning you towards him. He placed one hand on your hip, pulling you in, before kissing you with wild passion.

You felt the roughness of his stubble first and then the softness of his lips. Slowly, you closed your eyes, kissing him back. 

He was a fast kisser, constantly changing the way he sucked at your lips, alternating between tilting his head to the side so that he could press his mouth into yours, and tilting his head downwards so that he could pull your mouth while you struggled to stay connected. He was constantly desperate for more access as if he wanted to make sure you felt him all over your lips, not one spot untouched.

Your hands rested on his soaking wet shirt that clung to his skin from when he had jumped into the pool to save the kid. It felt a little cold, but you got used to it as your kiss continued.

The only thing the two of you could hear was each other’s heavy breathing, along with the smack of your lips as they collided. That was, until, the sound of the pool door opened.

Both you and Carlos separated immediately, your lips feeling cold at the sudden touch of air, missing the warmth of Carlos’ own warm lips. You did, however, still feel the tingle left from his feverish push-and-pull play.

With about a two-foot distance now between the two of you, you both looked over to see what the noise was exactly.

In walked an older woman, one you would’ve guessed was in her early 60’s. Her hair was completely gray, resting in a shaggy bun with little hairs falling out. She looked rough – and ready to go home for the night.

“H–hey, Mary. You almost done for the night?”

She eyed him suspiciously before replying. “Wouldn’t that be a damn miracle.” 

She continued to go about her business, and you felt awkward watching their conversation. 

Suddenly, Carlos’ head shot towards you and then back towards Mary. “Oh, uh, I was just about to escort this…young, damsel-in-distress out of the building. She didn’t know where the exit was, you see.”

You shot him a dirty look as if saying, “I know where the exit is.”

Mary didn’t seem to care. She simply took the mop out of the water in the cleaning cart and plopped it on the floor. It made an uncomfortably loud squelch sound in an otherwise silent room. “Mmm.”

Carlos grabbed your things for you, and put an arm around your shoulder. “Well, I’ve gotta maintain my status as a gentleman, so…we’ll be on our way! See ‘ya later, Mary!”

It sounded like she mumbled out an “I hope not,” but you weren’t too sure.

The two of you walked quickly to the door, and once it shut behind you, Carlos let go of your arm. 

“Well, that was, uh–something?” He smiled, still holding onto your clothes and other items.

“Yeah,” you said, before looking up at him with an amused smile. “Damsel-in-distress, huh?”

He laughed and shuffled on his feet. “What, you the type that doesn’t like to be saved?”

You smirked. “Maybe I am, maybe I’m not. You wanna find out?”

He grinned as he looked at you, raising a brow in an amused fashion. “Only because you make it sound so alluring.”

After hearing his reply, you closed in on his body, wrapping your arms around his neck. You stood on your tippy-toes, whispering in his ear as your cheek brushed against his lengthy hair and scratchy stubble. “I’ll show you every part of me that you want, but you need to take me somewhere private first.”

You pulled back, and you saw that he was grinning. It was evident in his eyes alone that he was excited, although, there was a mix of something else, too. The other kind of excitement, perhaps – it was a very lustful look.

He held out his hand, and as you took it, he led you down the hall. You both laughed a little at the situation, adrenaline coursing through your veins. It was cold in the building, probably mostly because you still only had on a bikini, but you weren’t too focused on it. The warmth of Carlos’ hand and the anticipation for what you both were about to do were the main things on your mind right now.

Soon enough, Carlos pulls you into a room, and you look around, observing it. It was a locker room, although you hadn’t noticed whether it was for men, women, or unisex. You figured it didn’t matter all that much, though – it’s not likely that anyone would walk in.

Carlos twirled you around, pulling you into his chest again. He looked down at you, smiling before leaning down and kissing you. 

This time, his kiss was soft and exploratory. He took his time, not making any wild moves, although still leading the pace like he did the first time he kissed you. Maybe you were a damsel-in-distress after all – it was starting to seem like you were swept up in his game with no escape.

After a while, he broke away from the kiss, looking at you with gentle eyes. 

“I don’t have a key to lock the door. Someone could walk in. Is that okay?”

You laughed a little, smiling. “Let them walk in.”

He chuckled back, speaking in a soft voice as he pushed a strand of your hair behind your ear. “You’re a bold girl, huh?”

Before you could respond, his lips were back on yours. His hands moved down your back before interlacing his fingers, keeping you pressed to him.

The kiss you shared was slow again at first, but it didn’t take long for it to pick up again. At the apex of your kiss, Carlos pulled his lips away, moving them to the corner of your mouth, to your cheek, and finally to your neck. It tickled at first due to his facial hair, and you let out a small laugh, but eventually, it started to feel really good.

He found all of the sweet spots on your neck, sucking and licking, desperate to hear the pleased moans that escaped you every time he touched you the way you liked. Once he seemed to want more, he began to travel further down your body. You smiled when he ventured over your breasts, gasped when he reached your stomach, and paused when he kissed your pelvic area.

Petting his hair, you spoke. “Carlos?”

“Hmm?” He mumbled, looking up at you. He was waiting for you to give the go-ahead.

You felt a little nervous asking, but you knew it was important. “Have you been tested recently?”

He paused, thinking. “I haven’t been sexually active for a while, so I haven’t gone to get a test any time recent. The last time I did, though, there were no concerns.” He then picked up your leg, throwing it over his broad shoulder. He placed a kiss on your inner thigh. “Is that okay?”

You nodded your head and returned to running your fingers through his curls. He smiled up at you and started kissing through the bottom piece of your swimsuit again.

Once he figured he had done enough teasing, he removed your leg off his shoulder, slipping the bottoms down. You stepped out of it, and he picked your leg up again, placing it in its former position on his shoulder. 

“You’ve got a pretty pussy.” he said nonchalantly, placing a kiss on where the slit started. 

You laughed a little, pulling his head back to look up at you. He let you do it. “And you’ve got a pretty face to look at while you eat my pretty pussy.”

He let out a small exhale of a laugh, and you felt his breath brush up against your clit. Your grip on his head shivered, and it didn’t go unnoticed.

Soon enough, he was licking and kissing your soft spot. He took his time, remaining very gentle and attentive. No tremble, no shake, no quiver went unnoticed while he worked. 

As you started to get closer to orgasm, you pulled him by his hair, tilting his head up at you. His eyes were half-lidded, staring up at you, his lapping at your folds unwavering. 

You rubbed yourself a little more forcibly into him, grinding against his face. He seemed to like it, as he placed a hand on your hip, bringing you down even harder onto him every time you pushed up against him. 

You felt yourself getting close, and the moans you had been stifling were getting hard to hold in. “Fucking god, Carlos, I’m close.” you murmured.

Carlos didn’t respond, nor speed up, he simply shut his eyes and kept the pace he had been going at. You stared down at his eyelashes, admiring how long they were as you came.

Your body shook a little, and once the high was over, you were panting, relying on Carlos to hold you up. He slowly pulled away, placing your leg back down, running his hands up your body as he stood up with you. 

He held you for a moment, placing your head against his chest, and rubbing your back as you calmed down. 

Once your breathing was steady, you pulled away from him, grabbing him by the shirt. His eyes widened, and he gave you an amused look.

You clung to him for a moment, before running your hands down his body as you got onto your knees in front of him. 

Panicked, he took your hands off him and held them gently. “Hey, hey– you don’t have to–”

You looked up at him, still panting a little. “I’m paying you back.”

He shook his head, and then let go of one of your hands to caress your face. “Nah. Not this time. You can pay me back another time. After all, if I let you pay me back now, you might just run away and I won’t get to see you again.” 

He smiled down at you as he said it, and you blushed a little when you realized he said not this time. That meant that there would be other times.

He then helped you up to your feet and kissed you again. It was a gentle kiss, but after your last orgasm, you were feeling needy for something faster.

You took the lead from him, kissing him as aggressively as you could to show that you were ready for him to be a little more rough with you. He seemed to get the hint but pulled away from the kiss. 

“I don’t have a condom,” he said, seeming a little downcast at the thought.

You smiled at him, your arms now around his neck. “I do.”

He perked up a little and smirked at you. “You’re a little too prepared for a damsel-in-distress, aren’t you?”

You laughed and replied as you went to get the condom from your purse. “I’d say I’m just the right amount of prepared.”

As you walked back over to him with the condom, he pulled you in and started kissing your neck once more. He moved from up, down, up, down, then up again before whispering in your ear. “Think you’re prepared enough to put it on me?”

You laughed at his smooth words, and you whispered back. “What, you don’t know how to put one on yourself?”

He chuckled, and pulled away, taking the condom as you handed it to him. He tore it open using his teeth, staring down at you as he did it. Once it was open, you made a smart remark. “You know you’re not supposed to use your teeth to get it out, right?”

He chuckled, placing the wrapper and condom in his palm. He made a closed fist and went to remove his clothes. You admired his body as he did – and in regards to your earlier comment about him being a hairy man, you were right. He had just the right amount of chest hair, as well as a happy trail stemming from his trimmed pubic area. “Guess you were right – I don’t know how to put one on, after all.”

You laughed, watching him slide the thin condom onto his shaft. He was pretty big – you were a little worried about being able to fit all of him in. 

Once he was certain the condom was on well, he looked over at you before picking you up in a rush. You giggled, wrapping your legs around his hips and burying your head in his neck. After a couple of seconds, you felt the cold wall against your back, and arched into him a little, trying to escape from the freezing touch.

He made a hmm noise that sounded amused at your squirming and then began pecking little kisses on your neck. You slowly eased back against the wall, getting used to the cold.

Once you did, Carlos began to press his body into you. You could tell Carlos enjoyed getting as much skin-on-skin as he could when intimate because he was always somehow buried in your touch. 

His hips ground his cock into your stomach, humping you slowly as he continued to suck your neck. You were starting to get a little impatient now, wanting him inside you already, and so the next time he ground into you, you ground back.

He didn’t seem to be expecting it, as he let out a throaty, closed-mouth moan. He got the hint, though, as he pulled back a little, and propped himself at your entrance. 

Slowly, he lowered you down onto his cock. He inserted the head first, watching your expression to see if it was okay. You winced a little, and he noticed.

Whispering, he tried to encourage you while he eased into you. “You’re doing good, Y/N. Most damsels-in-distress would’ve given up by now.”

You laughed, feeling him sink into you more. He smiled, watching your face as you adjusted. “Want me to make some noise for you?” he said, lowering his voice.

You nodded your head, interested in what noises he was going to make. 

He placed his head on your shoulder, beginning to make subtle grunts and moans the more his cock delved into you.

You started to get a little more wet from hearing his voice, turned on by the presumable pleasure he was feeling as he moved in deeper and deeper. Eventually, he was fully in, and you were more than ready to get started.

You tapped his shoulder, insinuating that you were good to go. He picked his head up from your collarbone, then pressed his forehead against yours as he began to pull out, then push back in.

Both of you gasped silently, gripping one another as a way to express how good it felt. He continued to move, alternating the way he did it, going from rolling his hips in a continuous rhythm to jerkily bucking into you. Carlos was proving to be a spontaneous lover, and you had to admit, you enjoyed being kept on your toes.

Eventually, things started to pick up, and Carlos was now thrusting into you with a feverish desire. You moaned into his mouth as he kissed you, hearing his heavy breathing every time he pulled away for air. You knew it wouldn’t be much longer until he came, and so you decided that you would start making your way to orgasm as well.

One of your arms reached down to your clit, and you began to rub yourself while Carlos buried himself in you. He pulled away from the kiss with a pop, which actually wasn’t as audible, since it was drowned out by the sound of both of your breathing, moaning, and collision of skin. 

He buried his head into your neck, a slur of whines, grunts, and moans escaping his lips.

You listened to his voice, closing your eyes, and focusing on reaching your climax. It didn’t take long after he caught on that you were right there, and whispered in your ear, “Do it. Cum on me. Cum on my cock.”

As you came down from your high, you trembled in Carlos’ arms. You noticed he was starting to become shaky himself, and you were a little worried as you felt his hands wobble underneath your bottom. It was likely that his arms were getting tired from holding you up for a prolonged amount of time.

You pulled his head in close, whispering in his ear. As you did, you heard his breath hitch, panting as if he were desperate for air. “Carlos,” you said, “Let me help you cum. What do you need?”

He opened his mouth to speak, but only a moan came out at first. “My back…scratch up my back.”

You listened to what he asked, digging your nails into his skin, softly at first, and then a little more rough once you felt him shiver. He seemed to like it a lot.

He continued, which surprised you a little. You thought he would’ve stopped at his one request, but he didn’t. He must’ve been a needy man. “Kiss my neck,” he huffed, “please, Y/N.”

You followed what he asked, kissing on his neck as you clawed up the muscles on his back. It didn’t take much longer after that, and soon enough his entire body was trembling. He thrust a couple more times into you, grunting as he did, and you felt his cock jerk as he spilled his warm seed into the condom. 

As soon as he came, his hands lost most of their grip on holding you, and you unwrapped your legs around his waist, jumping down. You felt him press into you, heaving as if he weren’t getting any air. You smiled and decided to comfort him as he did for you earlier after eating you out.

Pulling him into an embrace, you felt his head rest against the wall, trying to reach your shoulder, but failing as he was too tall. You chuckled and began to rub his back, talking to him in an endearing tone. “You good, Carlos?”

“Yeah–yeah, I’m good.” he huffed, and soon after his response, he pulled back, standing straight as he looked down at you.

“So, was it good? For you, I mean.” He said, running a hand through his hair. 

You laughed, reaching up to caress his cheek. He leaned into your touch. “It was really good. The best I’ve ever had, I’d say.”

He smiled, taking your hand from his cheek and kissing it, “It was good for me, too. Turns out I really like saving damsels-in-distress. Who knew, huh?”

You rolled your eyes at his comment. The two of you then continued your back-and-forth witty remarks, while agreeing on going to wash yourselves off quickly in the showers that were a part of the locker room you just had sex in. As you both bathed in separate stalls, you continued to talk, practically yelling over the bustling of the shower head as the water fell.You hoped no one was nearby outside, because it was likely they would have heard you.

Once finished, the two of you got dressed and grabbed your stuff. Luckily enough, the locker room that you went into was the men’s, so Carlos was able to grab his things from the locker he usually uses when on lifeguard duty.

The two of you then walked out of the building together, acting like a newlywed couple. You teased one another, laughing and joking around as you had the entire night.

Once outside, feeling the chill on your skin, you both paused, not sure where to go from there. You both didn’t really want to go your separate ways.

You desperately wanted to ask for his number, but you weren’t sure how to do so in a witty and playful way. You didn’t want to ask outright, because for some reason, even after all you just did, you worried it would come off as desperate. Even though you were desperate.

You opened your mouth to speak but was cut off by Carlos. “Hey, so, if it’s alright with you–you wouldn’t mind me asking for your number, would you?”

You giggled, happy that he was thinking of the same thing. “No, I wouldn’t mind at all. I was just thinking of asking the same thing.”

Carlos smiled, and the two of you quickly exchanged numbers. “Make sure to give me a cutesy name and contact photo.” He said playfully grinning at you.

And that gave you an idea. “Hey, why don’t we take a picture right now? That way we both get to have a cute contact photo.”

He smiled, ruffling your hair, and then let you hold your phone up, ready to take the picture. 

“Cheese!” you exclaimed, and he laughed as you pressed the camera button. 

After taking the photo, you sent it to him straight away. The two of you then realized it was getting late, and you couldn’t drag your time on with one another any longer. You said your goodbyes, and both went in different directions to get into your cars.

As soon as you got into your car, you started it and began to think about your night. Your cheeks blushed, and you immediately grabbed your phone. You had to tell your friends what happened.

Unsurprisingly, they all freaked out on you, exclaiming how they were wondering where you went. You laughed a little, typing out a quick summary. After hitting send, one of your friends began to ask strange questions.

“Jill: Wait, what does he look like?”

Puzzled, you typed out a relatively simple description. After a couple of minutes, your friend responded.

“Jill: Wtf I think I know him”

“Jill: He’s in my science class???”

“Jill: Dude sucks at science lmao”

You were a little taken aback by the revelation of Jill knowing Carlos, although you were a little more shocked at him sucking at science. He seemed like a science-y kinda guy.

As you continued to chat with your friends, you got a notification from Carlos. Your heartbeat quickened, and you wondered what he had to say so soon.

Upon opening the notification, you saw that what he had sent was a screenshot of your contact name and profile picture in his phone – it was the selfie the two of you took, along with the name “Damsel.”

You reply with your own screenshot, which also used the selfie the two of you took, while his name was set to “Phelps.” It didn’t take long for him to reply,

“Phelps: Hey, hasn’t anyone ever told you it’s rude to call a gentleman Phelps?”

You laughed out loud, and could already tell you’d be spending the rest of your night talking with Carlos.

Oh well. The night was still young.

For the official and original Kinktober 23 prompts, check here. Credits to @kinktober2023 for the ideas!

#carlos oliveira #carlos resident evil #carlos oliveira smut #carlos oliveira fluff #resident evil smut #resident evil fluff #resident evil #resident evil oneshot #kinktober 23 #kinktober #carlos oliveira x you #carlos oliveira x reader #instalove #pool boy #re3 remake #size difference #re fanfic #resident evil fanfiction #smut

[bellaxgiornata]

Safe Haven [Chapter Five]

Pairing: Michael Kinsella x Fem!Reader Word Count: 5.2k [Series Masterlist]

Warnings/tags: 18+ for this series; contains violence, drug use, domestic abuse, smut, hurt/comfort, angst, mutual pining, friends to lovers

a/n: Chapter five is here with some emotional hurt/comfort! I've had Mikey stuck on the brain so y'all get another chapter and I hope you enjoy it! Chapter six will most likely come some time after I focus a bit more on my Matty stories. Feel free to leave love if you enjoyed this one! Mikey and Reader get a little closer...

Tag list: @loveroftoomanyfandoms @farfromstrange @rotscinema @1988-fiend @shouldbestudying41 @shiorimakibawrites @norestfortheshelbywicked @mattmurdocksstarlight @acharliecoxedfan @roseallisonparker @yarrystyleeza @dramaholic18 @mattkinsella2 @ms-murdockswift @theetherealbloom @24hflower @mattmurdocksscars

“I don’t know how you watch these mindless shows,” you muttered, eyes on the reality romance show your sister was watching.

The pair of you were curled up on either end of the couch in her living room, an oversized plush blanket tossed over the both of you. You’d made dinner tonight and had it ready for when Megan had finished her shift at the hospital today, having spent your morning restocking her fridge and her pantry. You’d later spent your afternoon grudgingly working on writing after Angela had checked in with you, but you’d only managed a measly two thousand words today. You weren't exactly thrilled about that, but you had admittedly been distracted after yesterday. 

Thankfully nothing strange and out of the ordinary had happened today. There had been no weird traces of him cropping up anywhere–in your life or online. Which you’d been grateful for, your fear lessening just a bit today. You figured if he’d found you, you’d certainly know by now. 

“Considering my love life has been very much lacking,” Megan replied from the other end of the couch, “I’ll take my romance wherever I can get it. And speaking of–” she continued, her head rising from off the pillow as she focused on you, “–what’s going on with you and the attractive ex-felon next door?”

Your head shifted on the pillow, your attention turning to your sister. Eyebrows rising onto your forehead, you sent her a questioning look.

“What’re you talking about?” you asked her.

She rolled her eyes, a grin forming on her mouth. One of her feet nudged you in the leg before she shot you a pointed look. “Come on,” she said. “I’ve seen you and him outside chatting a couple of times now.”

“Twice,” you told her. “You’ve seen us chatting twice .”

Her grin widened into something sly. “Birdy says she saw you taking a walk with him the other day,” she shot back. “So spill, sis. Is there some romance going on in your life?”

You stiffened a little at your sister’s words. Birdy had seen you going on a walk with Michael? Well that was news to you. Unwelcome news, too, because you’d clearly done something to end up on her radar. Especially if she was chatting with Megan about you. You’d have to be careful with her.

“No,” you told Megan firmly. “There’s nothing going on there.”

“You think he’s cute?” she pressed.

“Christ, Megan!” you cursed. “What does it matter? I’m literally trying to hide out here, I’m not looking for a boyfriend! You know that!”

It only irritated you further when her smile grew wider.

“You think he’s hot, don’t you?” she teased.

You rolled your eyes, turning your attention back to the show. Megan nudged you with her foot again. When you didn’t respond, she began to repeatedly poke you with her foot, each time more aggressively than the last.

"Would you stop?" you grumbled. 

"Then answer me, please," she begged. 

With a huff you pushed yourself upright into a sitting position on the couch, glaring at your sister. "He's attractive, yes. Would I fuck him? Absolutely. You happy with that?" you snapped.

Megan gradually pushed herself up on the other end of the couch, her eyes meeting yours. The amused expression that had been there moments ago was quickly replaced with something serious now.

"I just want you to be happy," she said softly. "And it seems like you might be interested in him. Maybe let your guard down with him a bit? That’s all I’m saying."

One of your brows arched up at her. "You're encouraging me to date an ex-felon fresh out of prison," you pointed out. "You know that, right?"

"You and I both know there's more to someone than the mistakes of their past," she replied. "Plus," she added, her lips curling into a coy smile, "Birdy said he seems interested in you."

Your gaze dropped down to your hands where they were fidgeting with the soft, blue blanket. Twisting the fabric between your fingers, you quietly admitted, "He asked me on a date last night."

Megan practically shot herself across the couch at you, the sudden movement startling you. She gripped your shoulders tight in both hands, a bright smile spreading across her face. 

"Please tell me you said yes," she begged. “ Please , for the love of God, tell me you said yes!”

"I told him no," you answered, watching as her face instantly fell. "Meg, I can't date right now. Who knows if I might need to disappear again at a moment’s notice. It would be so much harder if I had feelings for someone. Not to mention, I'd be putting him in danger, too. You know if Victor ever found out I was seeing someone he would certainly go after them."

“Well,” Megan said, “I get the feeling Michael can take care of himself.”

“I don’t want him involved,” you told her.

“He could probably help you,” she pushed.

“I don’t want him involved,” you repeated more firmly.

Her shoulders dropped as she sat back against the couch with a sigh. “Fine, at least tell me how he asked you out?” she asked. “Let me live through you? Because I haven’t been asked out on a date since shortly after I moved here.”

You shrugged, your eyes dropping back down to the blanket. “He just asked if I wanted to get drinks with him. As a thank you,” you mumbled.

“Okay, wait, hold on,” Megan said, abruptly sitting forward again and holding up a hand. “He–he asked you to get drinks as a thank you ? A thank you for what, exactly?” Her eyes widened as she excitedly asked, “Did you give him really good head or something?”

Your gaze instantly snapped up to Megan, your mouth dropping open. “No!” you shrieked. “Christ, get your mind out of the gutter. The man had a seizure the other night–or at least I’m very certain it was. He claims he doesn’t have seizures. But I saw and I helped him. That’s it.”

“You should tell him to get that checked out then,” Megan said, her tone suddenly professional. “If he has epilepsy there’s medication that’ll help.”

“Thanks nurse Megan,” you deadpanned. “I’ll certainly tell him that.”

She waved a dismissive hand at you. “Okay, so he wanted to thank you for helping him. That’s sweet, sis. He sounds sweet.”

“Yeah, he certainly seems that way,” you mumbled, your eyes returning to your fidgeting hands.

Megan bumped your shoulder with hers lightly. “Maybe you should really consider just opening up to him? Tell him the truth about Vic. I’m sure that family is great at keeping secrets with what they probably do. I bet he’d have no trouble keeping yours. And maybe he could help? You can’t exactly spend your entire life on the run, changing names and addresses every few months. That’s not living.”

“I know it’s not,” you whispered, tears stinging at your eyes. 

“There’s really no harm in letting him in,” she said softly, wrapping an arm around your shoulder. “Telling him the truth. Maybe give him a chance. Who knows, you might end up happy.”

“Or he might end up dead,” you rebutted.

“Hey, you said it yourself,” Megan countered. “Victor doesn’t have the support of the Serpents on this anymore. It’s just him chasing you. They know he’s gone off the rails.”

You ducked your head, eyes dropping down to where your hands were more aggressively worrying the blanket between your fingers. “All the more reason for him to want to kill me and get on with the Club. But honestly, if he said he found me and asked them for help in any way–travel, money, disposing of my fucking body–he’d get help. They won’t actively help him search for me, but they’d certainly have his back.”

“Well I think you should give Michael a chance,” Megan replied. “Tell him the truth. Maybe get ahead of things before the Kinsellas find out you’re not who you say you are. They might be sympathetic–especially the Kinsella that wants to take you out for drinks.”

Eyes slowly shifting towards your sister, you watched her for a moment as you silently contemplated her words. Would Michael be more understanding than you’d initially thought? He had certainly seemed different than you’d envisioned him being. He had come out last night on his own just to check on you. And there was that gentleness you seemed to pick up on from him. Something warm and welcoming that you’d found yourself curious to explore. But would he be safe? Could you actually trust him? Let your guard down with him?

Could he actually hold his own against your ex?

Megan’s loud ringtone blared from her phone on the coffee table, the noise breaking through your thoughts. Your sister slipped her arm from around your shoulders and leaned forward, picking it up. You saw the frown on her lips as she looked at the screen before she answered the call.

“Hey Dev, what’s going on?” Megan asked.

You watched her quietly from your place on the couch, listening in to the one-sided conversation. It was a minute before she was off of the phone, exhaling a long breath. Slowly she turned, sending you a tense smile.

“I’m needed to cover a short shift at the hospital,” she said. 

Your brows furrowed at her words. “But you just got back a couple of hours ago?”

“They’re understaffed,” she said, pushing the blanket from her lap and rising to her feet. “There was a shooting tonight.” She glanced at you, her eyes softening. “Devon said one of the Kinsella’s had been shot and…one of their younger boys had been killed accidentally in the incident.”

Lips parting in surprise, your heart suddenly pounded hard in your chest. “Michael?” you breathed out.

Megan sent you a sad smile, shaking her head. “No, his cousin Eric. But it–it was his nephew that was shot and killed.”

“Shit,” you whispered.

“I uh, I’m going to change and head out,” she said. “I’ll see you tomorrow?”

“Yeah, yeah,” you told her, waving her off. “Go. I don’t want to hold you up.”

Megan sent you one last smile before she turned, making her way up the stairs and towards her room to change. You sat there on the couch, your eyes on the television but your mind unable to focus on anything but what Megan had just told you. You figured Michael would be hurting tonight once he’d gotten this news. For some reason you couldn’t seem to shake him from your mind, even long after Megan had left for the hospital.

You’d been sitting on your bed for the past couple of hours trying to focus on your writing. Your laptop was situated on your mattress before you, your fingers hovering just over the keys as your eyes stared at the blinking cursor. Truthfully you’d barely managed to write much of anything. You couldn’t concentrate.

Shortly before you’d come upstairs there had been a handful of police down the street, their lights flashing through the front windows of Megan’s house. You’d assumed they were here informing the family of the young boy who’d been killed about the situation, especially considering the heartbreaking scream you’d heard down the street not long after they'd shown up.

You’d come upstairs to get away from the flashing lights, trying to distract yourself from the thoughts you didn’t understand why you were having. You didn’t know Michael or his family that well. This shouldn’t be bothering you as much as it was. And you’d certainly been more closely connected to shootings than this in your past. 

Yet still, here you sat, unable to focus.

A light in Michael’s bedroom turned on, the sudden brightness of it catching your attention. Your eyes flew up from your laptop screen and straight towards his room, your breath catching in your throat. He shuffled into his bedroom, both of his hands covering his face. When he reached his bed, you saw him crumple to his knees–but not as if he was having a seizure. As if the pain of his grief from what had happened to his family tonight had been too much to bear and he’d simply collapsed under the weight of it.

Not even thinking, you closed your laptop, instinctively leaning forward on your bed towards your window. You were gnawing nervously on your bottom lip, your heart twisting in your chest at the sight of Michael. Unlike last time, you couldn’t just hop a fence to get to him. But would he even want you to see him like this? You were still just a stranger to him, after all. Even if he’d been interested enough to ask you on a date. He probably didn’t even know his curtains were open and that you were watching him right now. You should really look away, leave the room and give him his privacy.

But you couldn’t. 

You sat there conflicted on your bed, watching his shoulders shake against the edge of his mattress. It wasn’t until you saw him slide down the side of it, curling into a ball on the floor of his bedroom, that you found yourself climbing off of your bed. 

You didn’t know what it was that had come over you, but you grabbed a knitted cardigan from your closet, threw your arms into it, and then slipped your phone into your pocket. You were rushing out of your bedroom and taking the stairs two at a time soon after. As you passed the kitchen, you grabbed the house key from off of the hook and pushed your way out of the front door. You only paused to quickly lock the door behind you before you were making your way down the driveway, your arms wrapped around your chest to block some of the cold. 

You rounded the stone fence and took a sharp left, making your way up Michael’s empty driveway. Still nervously chewing your lip, you came to a stop in front of his door. Your fist rose towards it, but it hovered in the air for a minute.

Was this too far? Should you just turn back around and head home? Surely he wouldn’t want you banging on his door tonight and bothering him with what was going on. But the image of Michael crumpled on the floor of his bedroom, crying all alone, flashed through your mind. That haunted, despairing look you often caught in his eyes had you wondering how much pain this man held inside and how often he was alone enduring it.

Without another thought, your fist finally closed the remaining distance, three loud knocks ringing out. Your heart began wildly beating in your chest immediately afterwards, your arms hugging yourself a bit tighter as your eyes snapped shut. 

“Fuck fuck fuck,” you muttered under your breath.

You’d actually just knocked on his door. What the hell were you even going to say ? You hadn’t even thought that far ahead, just strangely drawn here by the desire to help ease his pain somehow and you didn’t even know why. Shrinking in on yourself, you took a step back. This was a bad idea, you thought. It was stupid. You should leave him alone. 

Turning away from his door, you ducked your head and started to make your way back to your place. Though you’d only made it three steps before you heard the door unlock and swing open behind you. You winced, pausing at the sound of his voice.

“Grace?”

Sucking in a sharp breath, you slowly turned around. Michael was standing in his doorway dressed in a pair of gray sweatpants, his blue and white striped sweater rumpled on his torso. His hair was a mess, as if he’d been running his hands through it, and you could see the dampness on his cheeks and the redness in his eyes. He looked broken and exhausted from where he stood in the doorway, but it also looked like he was doing his best to bury all of that back down.

“Hey,” you greeted him awkwardly.

“What’re ya–ya doin’ here?” he asked, clearing his throat. “Somethin’–somethin’ wrong? Did ya need help?”

Your lips parted in surprise at his words. With what you knew he had going on, his first thought was to ask if you needed help? For a moment you stood there stunned and speechless as his sorrowful eyes scanned you over. Snapping out of it, you shook your head.

“No, I–” you began, but you quickly stopped yourself.

What the hell did you even say?

Swallowing hard, your mouth felt like it was drying up as your nerves swirled in your gut. In the doorway, Michael’s face fell. He nodded slowly, his eyes dropping to his feet.

“So ya heard, yeah?” he asked quietly.

You nervously shifted your weight from foot to foot as you stood there before him. “Uh, yeah,” you admitted.

He nodded again, his eyes still not focused on you. “Ya come to tell me to stay away? Because I understand, don’t worry. I won’t–”

“No,” you cut him off quickly.

His eyes rose, landing back on yours almost instantaneously. The dark brows on his forehead pulled tight together, a crease forming between them. He looked a mixture of shocked and confused.

“I came to see how you were doing,” you admitted. “Megan–my half-sister–was called back to the hospital. She uh, she mentioned what happened and I–I wanted to make sure you were doing okay…I guess.”

The expression on his face never changed as he stood there leaning against the doorframe. Even in the dim light washing over him from the room behind him, you could see the way his eyes were studying your face very closely.

“Ya came to see if I was okay?” he clarified after a moment.

You shrugged, ducking your head as you ran a hand across your forehead. God you felt dumb. Of course he wasn’t okay. And you sounded like an idiot right now.

“Yeah, I don’t know,” you began, feeling the words beginning to tumble out of your mouth before you could stop them. “I heard what happened and I figured you wouldn’t be in a good place when you heard the news. But then I–I saw you in your room.” You shook your head, grimacing as your voice picked up and the word vomit continued to spill out of your mouth. “And I wasn’t trying to invade your privacy or anything, I swear, but your curtains were open and the light turning on caught my attention. I–I was going to leave and give you your privacy but then you just looked so upset that I–I found myself suddenly over here wanting to see if you were okay.” You inhaled a shaky breath, your focus still downcast as your mind screamed at you to stop talking. “It just seemed like maybe you could use some comfort–or maybe to not be alone–but I’m also quite aware of the fact that you barely know me and this is incredibly weird.”

You took a breath, feeling absolutely embarrassed at everything that had just come pouring out of you as you glanced back up at him. He was still standing in the doorway, his mouth hanging open. Confusion and something else was etched very noticeably across his features as he continued to silently gape at you. You immediately felt more ridiculous.

“I’m sorry, this was incredibly weird and intrusive,” you said quickly, taking two steps back. “I’m just–just going to go. Sorry.”

As you were turning to leave, you saw him quickly step out of his house. You paused, your back towards him as your heart hammered heavily in your chest. When he spoke next, you glanced over your shoulder back at him.

“No, stay,” he begged. “Please.”

Michael crossed the bit of distance between the pair of you, your body moving of its own accord and turning back to face him. You could see the glisten of fresh tears in his eyes when he reached you, his lips trembling.

“You’re right,” he breathed out. “I don’t want to be alone. But I–” he paused, his eyes closing as a tear slipped down his cheek, “–I’m always the one expected to be strong.” 

When his eyes opened, they landed back on yours. With the amount of pain so visibly staring back at you through them, it took every ounce of strength to keep from drawing him into a hug and offering some form of physical comfort to him. You knew what that felt like, always needing to be strong even when you felt like you were anything but that.

“D’ya…want to come in?” he asked softly, gesturing his head back to his house. “I know ya said ya weren’t comfortable before but…would that be alrigh’?”

Megan’s words were echoing in your mind from just a few hours ago–she’d urged you to let him in. And now you’d already came over here with the intention of trying to comfort him, why not listen to her a little more? Surely Michael wasn’t going to do anything to hurt you if you went inside with him. Maybe now was an opportunity to trust him just a little more.

“Okay,” you answered softly.

A sad smile tugged up the corners of Michael’s lips just a bit. He nodded once before he turned, trudging his way back into his house. Awkwardly you followed behind, stepping inside and closing the door behind you. When you turned back around, you saw him already making his way down the short hallway into what appeared to be the sitting room at the far end. Slipping off your shoes beside his, you bit your lip and made your way past his kitchen and down the hallway after him, passing by a mirror as you went and cringing at your own disheveled state.

The first thing you noticed in the dimly lit sitting room were the three bullet holes on the wall not too far from his sofa. Near those holes, the wallpaper was peeling up in a few places. Eyes shifting, you spotted the brick fireplace across from his sofa–instantly your eyes were drawn to the unmistakable bullet hole in the brick. Clearly something had happened here, and you assumed whatever it was probably had to do with why Birdy had initially said Michael wouldn’t want to stay in this house. You found yourself curious, but that wasn’t something to be brought up tonight.

Making your way over to the sofa, you sat down near Michael but not quite too close. You felt tense and uncertain, truthfully not sure where to go from here. 

“I’m…sorry about your nephew,” you said slowly, your eyes focused on your hands in your lap. “And your cousin.”

“I was there,” he breathed out.

At his words, your head whipped in his direction. He was focused on his coffee table, his eyes unblinking as he spoke. Your heart was constricting in your chest at the pain emanating from him beside you.

“It was my fault,” he whispered. “Jamie had offered to bring me to the gym tonight.” Michael shook his head, the tears once again welling up in his eyes. “Didn’t even have a license yet. I shouldn’ have let him.” His eyelids slowly lowered as he drew in a shuddering breath. “The bullet wasn't meant for him. It shouldn’–shouldn’ have been Jamie. But he was–was already gone when I realized–”

He broke off mid-sentence, his body folding in half on the sofa as he buried his face in his hands. With tears stinging at your own eyes, you cautiously slid closer towards him on the cushions. Very hesitantly you raised a hand, carefully lowering it to his shoulder.

“It shouldn’ have been him!” he choked out. “He was just a boy!”

“I’m sorry,” you whispered.

“Was such a–a good kid,” Michael mumbled. “Whole future ahead of him. Now he’s–he’s just gone .”

You felt a few tears slip out of your own eyes, the back of your right hand raising up to wipe them away. Your left hand began gently rubbing a hesitant but soothing pattern along Michael’s shoulder. You noticed how he quickly leant into your touch, clearly craving the comfort that you figured he must not often receive. Something else you could relate to. 

“And his mother and my brother are–are so heartbroken,” he continued, his voice cracking and muffled behind his hands as he spoke. “Losin' their son. And everyone is–is tellin' me how I need to be there for them. How it's goin' to be so hard on them dealin' with everythin'. But–"

He paused, a sob wracking through him loudly and shaking his shoulder beneath your hand. Your heart ached at the sound, but when he very slowly turned his head from its place in his hands, his body still crumpled in half as he looked up at you beside him, you felt like your heart completely broke. 

His face was streaked in tears, more of them pouring out of his eyes and streaming down his face as he gazed up at you. Michael’s face was twisted and pinched with grief, his lips visibly trembling again. It hurt to see him like this.

"He was mine," he breathed out. 

You stiffened on the sofa at his words when he'd spoken, those three words taking you by surprise. Had you just heard him right?

"Jamie was mine , too," he confessed, his voice hoarse. "It was–was a stupid thing, havin' an affair with my brother's wife back then. But Jaime was my boy, too."

Your face instantly softened as your eyes held his. You couldn't even begin to imagine the emotional pain he must have been experiencing right now after having just witnessed his own son's death in front of him. 

"I'm–I'm so sorry," you whispered. "I–I can't imagine what you must be feeling."

He sent you a sad, watery smile. "The interestin' part about it all is," he said softly, "that out of everyone in my family–all o' them knowin' the damn truth–the only one askin' how I am is…you."

Your mouth opened and closed a few times, unsure how to respond to what he had said or the way in which he was looking at you right now. 

So he'd had an affair with his brother's wife quite a few years back–from the brief glimpse you'd seen of Jaime a few days ago he looked to be about sixteen or seventeen. And apparently that affair all those years ago had resulted in a child. One that everyone in his family apparently knew was his, yet no one thought to offer Michael comfort over his passing? To just ask how he was doing? 

"Birdy she–she was tellin' me I need to be there for Amanda and Jimmy when she picked me up from the station after the questionin' 'bout the shootin'," he continued. "And Amanda–" he paused, his eyes closing as he leaned into your hand on his shoulder further. "She only wanted to know about his last moments. Came over a bit ago to ask how he died. Didn't bother to ask how I was. Not after–after what I'd been through watchin' our son die."

More tears began to fall from his closed eyes, his body slumping further forward as if his grief was pulling him down. You simply gave in to your instincts this time, unable to hold them back. Wrapping both of your arms around his neck, you carefully drew him towards you. Michael didn't protest in the slightest. He easily wrapped his arms around your waist and buried his face against your shoulder. You could feel the dampness of his tears seeping through your sweater but you didn’t remotely care. You had absolutely no idea what it was drawing you to Michael, what had made you want to be here for this man you barely knew, but it felt right somehow.

“I don’t know why I’m tellin’ ya all this,” he mumbled against you, his words almost mirroring your thoughts. “Probably shouldn’ be. Sure you’re not warmin’ up to me hearin’ all this. Sleepin’ with my brother’s wife. My son gettin’ shot tonight.”

“That was years ago,” you replied, holding him to you. “And not really any of my business, either. And you’ll come to find I’m…quite open-minded to people’s pasts.”

Michael huffed out a laugh, his warm breath grazing your neck. “Got me wonderin’ what that means, Grace,” he mused.

The corner of your lip pulled up ever so slightly, your right hand sliding up from its place along his back and up into his hair. Your fingers lightly carded through the dark strands, feeling a bit of tension ease from him as he relaxed further into you. 

“It’s not really important at the moment,” you whispered.

Michael's head shifted on your shoulder, goosebumps rising along your forearms under your sweater the moment his lips briefly grazed the sensitive skin of your neck, his beard faintly rasping against you. Your eyes fell closed, wondering momentarily why it felt so good having this almost stranger in your arms, especially under the circumstances.

“Why’d ya come check on me?” he murmured.

“I don’t–don’t really know,” you admitted. 

There was a moment of silence that fell between the pair of you before Michael slowly raised his head from your shoulder, drawing back from you just a bit. His eyes met yours and your heart stuttered in your chest at the way he was looking at you. You felt like you couldn’t breathe.

“Why’d ya stay?” he whispered.

Swallowing hard, you felt yourself once again getting lost in his eyes. Besides the obvious pain and sadness reflecting back at you, it looked like something else was slowly surfacing as they held onto yours. Something that looked a lot like hope.

“Because it seemed like you needed someone,” you answered.

One of his hands released you, unwinding its way from around your waist and slowly reaching up. Hesitantly he gently cupped your cheek in his large, warm palm. That sad smile returned to his mouth, his eyes still locked on yours. You didn’t know why your pulse was racing with him touching you so tenderly, in a way you’d never really been touched before. And you didn’t know why you were suddenly feeling things you probably shouldn’t have been feeling, either.

“Thank you,” he said firmly, enunciating the words purposefully. “For bein’ here when no one else ever has been.”

His thumb lightly stroked along your cheekbone, the calloused pad rough on your skin but somehow soothing. You found yourself overcome with the urge to lean in and kiss him–and that had certainly startled you. But for some reason, you weren’t bolting out of the front door like you should have been doing. Instead, your mouth was saying things it had no right to be saying.

“I’ll be here as long as you need me to be,” you told him.

And the ensuing warm smile that slipped onto his face at your words, despite the tears welling back up in his eyes, had you meaning every word of what you’d said. 

#michael kinsella x reader #michael kinsella x female reader #michael kinsella x you #michael kinsella #kin fanfiction

[thefallennightmare]

Moment of Weakness-thirteen

*credit to whoever created the gif. found on google/Pinterest *

Pairings: Mob!Bucky Barnes x reader

Warnings: language, smut, angst, fluff, affair, cheating, violence.

Summary: Reader is the assistant to New York's most feared mob boss, James Buchanan Barnes. He had the picture-perfect life: status in the mob, friends, and beautiful wife. So why can't he keep his mind and eyes off of reader?

Authors Notes: tbh, I'm still trying to figure out a mob storyline, like how with my last story Bucky was creating serum. But now I'm at a loss as to what it could be for this one. feel free to send me some ideas!

Tags(open): @splendidreads @sebsgirl71479 @mdpplgtz03 @pattiemac1 @unaxv @elizacusi-blog @alana4610 @broadwaybabe18 @themayzittcha @playboystark @raajali3 @ozwriterchick @ragamuffin285 @screamingdying @themorningsunshine @kenziekugler22 @calwitch @sebastianstansqueen @stanaddict @stucky-simp03 @sleyeveryday @loustan90 @lyra-black13 @valsworldofcreativity @cjand10 @tesseract69 @batprincess1013 @subwaysurf45 @arsonfrogger @winters1917 @yoruse @5moremin @lipstickandtanqueray @mandijo17 @joannaromanoff @justsebstan

“Bucky, stop it,” I giggled, feeling his presence behind me. 

He hummed while burying his face deeper into my neck, fingers softly tickling my sides. 

“You smell so good, doll.” 

I sighed while setting down the papers I was trying to fax and leaned my head back against his shoulder while looking up at him. 

“It’s called a shower. Soap, shampoo.” 

Bucky smirked. “Naked, I know the drill.” 

I smacked his chest while removing myself from his grasp and went back to my work. 

It had been almost a month now of our affair and we had been so perfect now to get caught that the last thing I needed was for Steve or Sam to walk into work and see Bucky’s lips all over me. There were a few stolen glances, soft touches, and quick kisses in his office. We opted on fully seeing each other at my house, never thinking of going to his house. 

Most nights were spent having sex and Bucky left right after but lately, it had been lounging on the couch and watching movies, Bucky still leaving afterwards. Every time he would go back to Natasha, my heart would chip away. I couldn’t be upset with him though because that was the price for our affair.

“Where are you going?” Bucky pouted while reaching for me. 

I playfully smacked his hands away. “Someone gave me a list of things to get done today and I’ve barely made a dent.” 

He shrugged. “You can take a break. Boss’ orders.” 

“You have a meeting with Stark in twenty minutes, remember?” I reminded him. 

“All I need is five,” his brows wiggled while he leaned against the wall, a smile pulling at the corners of his lips.   

My abdomen burned with his suggestive tone but I merely shook my head. “Trust me, I know that’s all you need. But I’m not risking getting caught cause you’re horny.” 

His bottom lip pouted and after a quick glance around, I took it between my own lips while ghosting a hand down his stomach and ghosted over his cock. Bucky groaned into the kiss. 

“Fucking tease,” he hissed. 

I gave him one last kiss. “Come by tonight and maybe I’ll finish what I started.” 

“I’m holding you to that, doll.” 

A loud squeal erupted from my throat when I walked past Bucky and felt him smack my ass quite hard and he simply shrugged then walked into his office. 

“Hey, what is Stark even coming for anyway?”

I was sitting at my desk while Bucky sat at his. 

“He’s funding the next project for Barnes Industries,” Bucky said. 

“Which is?” I pried with a small smile. 

He shook his head, however. “Not something you need to know, doll.” 

In the way he ended the conversation, I knew it wasn’t best to try and get more information out of him. There were some things that Bucky wouldn’t tell me about his place in the mob and even if he said it was for my safety, I couldn't help but wonder what he was working on behind closed doors. 

The rest of the morning passed by pretty quick, the meeting with Stark taking up majority of Bucky’s time so I barely saw him. He did manage to send me a few texts during the meeting. 

I miss you. 

I bet you’re staring at your work with a small smile on your face. 

All I can think about is your mouth on my cock. 

The last one caused my cheeks to flush and I had to make sure no one was around to read it on my phone. Thankfully, Steve and Sam were out doing the lunch pick up for me, since they saw I was buried in work. The three of us had just finished our lunch together on the couch in the main area of the office when the door behind me opened Stark greeting us with a smile. 

“Afternoon. Say, Y/N, I heard you stood up to Clint Barton,” Tony asked with a raised brow. 

I gave a half shrug. “It wasn’t that big of a deal. I just told him that I knew more than he thought I did, that’s all.” 

“Don’t be too sure,” Stark placed his infamous glasses on the bridge of his nose. “Barton doesn’t like being played like a fool, especially by women.” 

My heart began to beat fast and Steve noticed the way I shifted in my chair, placing a comforting hand on my knee to stop it from shaking. 

“I wouldn’t worry about it too much, Y/N,” Steve assured me. 

All I could do was nod while Bucky appeared behind Stark and showed him the way out, his eyes landing on Steve and me. The way his pupils darkened told me that he was jealous with how close we were. 

Steve must have sensed it because he removed his hand, placing it in his own lap. 

“Sam, any word from your guy if it’s ready?” Bucky asked. 

Sam held up his phone. “It’ll be ready in an hour.”

I looked between them, confused, and wanted to ask what they were talking about but with the stance Bucky had, I kept my lips shut.  

Bucky tossed a large leather bag onto Steve’s lap with a bit of extra force. “Why don’t you and Steve head over there to pick it up.”

Steve snickered while running a hand through his hair. “No need to be jealous, punk.” 

Bucky’s jaw clenched. “Get it done, jerk.” 

He then turned his attention towards me. “Y/N, can I see you in my office please?” 

I swallowed thickly. “Sure.” 

Bucky watched as Sam and Steve left before following me close into his office, the door locking shut behind us. 

“Did I do-?”

My question was seized with Bucky’s lips on mine, ravishingly attacking them, while he backed me against the wall and locked me in with his hips. I ran my hands through his short hair, wishing I had something to grab and pull, so I settled with tracing my fingers behind his neck. 

Bucky’s vibranium hand snuck up my shirt and began palming my left breast, my moan being swallowed by his tongue. He pulled away briefly, his pupils blown from lust, and began to bite down hard on my neck. 

“Bucky,” I hissed. “Someone will see.” 

“I don’t care,” he grunted into my neck, hips grinding into mine. 

My eyes fluttered shut at the feeling of ecstasy, the tip of his grown cock pressing into my thigh. I went to work on his belt in hopes that his pants would follow, however, his phone rang from pocket halting all of our actions. 

Bucky cursed as he pulled away and fished the phone out, eyes scanning the screen. 

“Is it important?” I asked, breathless from our kiss. 

He nodded. “Why don’t you head home for the rest of the day. I’ll come by after dinner.” 

I noticed the way his shoulders tensed, and face went rigid with anger. 

“Anything I could help with?” 

Bucky cupped my cheek and left a gentle kiss upon it. “I appreciate the help, doll. But I can handle it.” 

“Alright,” I nodded. “Eight o'clock?”

“Eight o'clock,” Bucky grinned.

I slammed the drawer shut with force, retrieving the pen I had been looking for, and hastily wrote down the list of things I needed to pick up at the store today for the office. My breathing was low and deep, anger festering low in my belly. 

“Doll,” the voice breathed against the shell of my ear. 

I pushed away from him and my desk, walking towards the other end of the office to do whatever I found for myself. As long as I was far away from him, I didn’t care what it was. 

“Y/N,” Bucky sighed as he followed me. 

“Leave me alone,” I demanded, not bothering to look at him. 

He stepped in front of me, blocking my path towards the small break room. A groan of annoyance rumbled out of my throat. 

“I’m sorry,” he apologized with a small pout. 

I scoffed and put all of my weight on my left foot. “You’re sorry? You fucking ditched me, Bucky. I waited all night for you.” 

He nodded and wrapped a hand around my wrist, bringing it to his lips and peppered kisses all over the skin there. 

“I know but something came up.” 

“Right, of course. What was it, work?” I questioned. 

Bucky swallowed and avoided my gaze. “Yeah.” 

My eyes sliced into him and removed myself from his grasp. “You’re a shit liar. Natasha posted a picture of the two of you at some club last night.” 

“Shit,” he cursed. 

“If you wanted to spend time with her, that’s all you had to say. I get it, she comes first.” 

My body was pressed up against a door behind me, Bucky capturing my lips in such a breathtaking kiss that I stood frozen in his embrace. It was a hard one, parting my lips with the force of it. There was nothing soft about it, the door I was pressed against rattling as Bucky shifted our position, his thigh digging into my heated core, and grabbed my face between his hands. 

Every single thought I had in my head exploded, to a bright, pounding white and I felt a desire twist in my insides heat up, ready to snap with my orgasm, thanks to Bucky moving my hips up which caused me to rut my pussy against his thigh.  

There was a screaming voice in my head, however, to stop this before someone walked in because even if we were hidden behind the wall, if someone turned the corner, they would catch us. I went to pull away but Bucky’s grip in my hair tightened while he swallowed my tongue. 

“No,” he said, bringing my lips back to his. Just like the previous kiss before. 

He had me in his hands like putty and I ignored the voice in my mind, hands sneaking underneath his suit jacket and pressed himself closer to me, my entire skin feeling as if it was on fire. 

“Hello?” A petite voice echoed. 

Bucky and I practically jumped away from each other after hearing the familiar voice and while I fixed my hair and shirt, Bucky shifted his now prominent dick, hoping it wouldn’t show her what we were just doing. 

“Bucky?” The voice sounded again. 

He walked out in the open and smiled at Natasha. “What are you doing here, sweetheart?” 

I leaned up against the wall to take a few deep breaths, hoping that the extra time would calm the redness that spread over my body. Natasha couldn’t see me so there was no way she caught what we had been doing. 

“Are you here alone?” Natasha asked. 

Bucky side eyed me and nodded. “Yeah, everyone went out for lunch.” 

“Well, Clint showed up to the house and he kept rambling on about-.” 

He grasped Natasha’s arm to silence her before pulling her into his office, my eyes watching with curiosity as to what the hell he didn’t want me to hear.

#mob!bucky barnes #mob!bucky barnes x reader #mob!bucky barnes and reader #mob!bucky barnes x yn #mob!bucky barnes and yn #mob!bucky barnes reader insert #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes and reader #sebastian stan #moment of weakness-mob!bucky barnes

[kithj]

i thought it would be fun to share what i’m reading for pride :-)

pageboy by elliot page

i have been a lifelong fan of elliot page, one of my first celebrity crushes (alongside anna paquin in xmen) & if you’ve ever watched any of his other work like gaycation or there’s something in the water, you know he is very articulate & deliberate with his words & that definitely translates into his writing as well. i’m about halfway through and really enjoying it, his writing is again very deliberate and snappy, and i like how he reflects on the history of where he grew up and interweaves it with his childhood & present day. one of my favorite passages so far is when he's reminiscing about playing pretend as a boy:

"Those were some of the best times of my life, traveling to another dimension where I was... me. And not just a boy but a man, a man who could fall in love and be loved back. Why do we lose that ability? To create a whole world? A bunk bed was a kingdom, I was a boy."

stone butch blues by leslie feinberg

i’ve read this collection many years ago as a teen/early 20s and it’s actually been really hard for me to reread. i got through the first 3 chapters and had to set it aside because it was really affecting me. maybe because i’m older… anyways, not sure if i’m going to finish this reread since i don’t really think i’m in the right headspace to handle it. however there’s a lot of Leslie Feinberg’s writing available online, i’ve shared some previously and you can find them here :-) sbb is also available for free on hir website, and i do still recommend it, just be aware of the content before you start reading.

honorable mentions follow because i haven't gotten the books in the mail yet 😭

miss major speaks by miss major griffin-gracy

this book just came out this past month, and i'm waiting for my copy to arrive. i'll just share the description here:

Miss Major Griffin-Gracy is a veteran of the infamous Stonewall Riots, a former sex worker, and a transgender elder and activist who has survived Bellevue psychiatric hospital, Attica Prison, the HIV/AIDS crisis and a world that white supremacy has built. She has shared tips with other sex workers in the nascent drag ball scene of the late 1960s, and helped found one of America’s first needle exchange clinics from the back of her van. Miss Major Speaks is both document of her brilliant life–told with intimacy, warmth and an undeniable levity-and a roadmap for the challenges black, brown, queer and trans youth will face on the path to liberation today.

you can donate to miss major's fundly here

the persistent desire: a femme-butch reader edited by joan nestle

i've read some of the essays in this anthology previously, but i have a really hard time reading the scanned pages on my laptop (hurts my head) so i bit the bullet and ordered my own copy from a used bookstore. it was suspiciously cheap compared to where i've seen it elsewhere, so fingers crossed it's the real deal. i'm excited because the shop noted that it had previous wear & potential writing in the margins from the previous owner and i look forward to seeing the thoughts of the person before me :-)

i really like reading older lesbian literature, though it makes me sad sometimes that a lot of the lesbian bar culture no longer exists. i wish i could go back and talk to some of the women and butches that lived through it.

hijab butch blues by lamya h

this is next on my to-read list, i think i might jump over to this one since i've set sbb aside for now. i'll just paste the description again:

When fourteen-year-old Lamya H realizes she has a crush on her teacher—her female teacher—she covers up her attraction, an attraction she can’t yet name, by playing up her roles as overachiever and class clown. Born in South Asia, she moved to the Middle East at a young age and has spent years feeling out of place, like her own desires and dreams don’t matter, and it’s easier to hide in plain sight.

To disappear. But one day in Quran class, she reads a passage about Maryam that changes everything: when Maryam learned that she was pregnant, she insisted no man had touched her. Could Maryam, uninterested in men, be . . . like Lamya?

i'm excited to read this one and get my own copy eventually. a lot of the butch literature i've read has been from white butches (primarily leslie feinberg & ivan coyote) & i look forward to reading a new perspective. kitty tsui is also another butch whose work i really like, she has an essay in the persistent desire and i know that one has made the rounds on tumblr before.

anyways just felt like sharing ! i haven't been able to do anything for pride this year so i'm trying to fill the void a bit with reading a lot of gay/lesbian literature. hope you all are having a safe and happy pride :-)

#personal

[vickysaurus]

If you’ve finished watching Prehistoric Planet, caught the dino bug, and want to watch more, well, I’ve got recommendations for some fantastic older Mesozoic documentaries and shows! I’m only gonna list my faves, but if you have good ones to add, feel free to do so!

Walking With Dinosaurs (1999)

The classic, the one I grew up with. A six episode miniseries that spans the entire Mesozoic, from the Triassic to the Cretaceous. Each episode focuses on a specific location and usually has one specific animal that’s more or less the main character, while also showing off others as they are encountered. The science and effects are 23 years old by now, so don’t expect much fluff or great CGI, but they used what they had very well. It helps a lot that the close-up shots are done using incredibly charming animatronics rather than CGI. The gorgeous music and Kenneth Branagh’s narration add a ton more personality to everything. You will cry about an Ornithocheirus at the end of his journey. There were three special bonus episodes released over the next few years that have Nigel Marven (more on him later) time travelling to see the dinosaurs in person. There are also two sequel series: Walking With Beasts and Walking With Monsters. WWM explores the Paleozoic but went through it too fast and suffers from some ‘Awesomebro-yness’ in my opinion but there’s not much else to turn to if you wanna see the Paleozoic unfortunately. WWB explores the Cenozoic and is every bit as good as WWD. When I had my recovery day after my third covid vaccine I put on all three in chronological order and just marathoned them and the various little aches didn’t bother me all day as I watched the history of the Earth from the Cambrian to the Quaternary.

Prehistoric Park (2006)

Time-travelling Nigel Marven returns from the Walking With Dinosaurs specials to bring back extinct animals to the present. As you might guess, it’s a bit more on the fictional side, but all the animals are really well done and scientific, as are the ecosystems they travel back to. The modern day parts are much more about actually properly running a zoo, including things like enrichment, proper animal care, and cranky zookeepers with a heart of gold becoming Ornithomimus parents than Jurassic Park type scenarios. Nigel doesn’t just get dinosaurs; he goes to the Cenozoic several times and even takes a trip to the Carboniferous for its giant arthropods. Recent enough that feathers are starting to appear on some dinosaurs, particularly the adorable Microraptors. Nigel is an absolute menace and I don’t know who gave him access to a time portal but i’m glad they did. The recent game Prehistoric Kingdom was strongly inspired by this one, to the point of having Nigel voice the tutorials and trailers. Features a friendly herd of Titanosaurs with a disregard for fences causing more havoc than any carnivores ever could.

When Dinosaurs Roamed America (2001)

America’s answer to Walking With Dinosaurs. A single two-hour long documentary spanning the whole of Mesozoic America and really focussing on how the dinosaurs developed between its segments. The only time I ever remember seeing the Early Jurassic depicted, and the only one on this list to treat the end-Permian and end-Triassic extinctions and how important they were for dinosaur evolution. Though it does blame asteroids for them. Very good stuff, aside from a scene where Velociraptors continue eating their prey even as a forest fire sets them on fire. It’s very America-centric, but that’s no weakness. John Goodman makes for a surprisingly good narrator and throws in a sneaky Flintstones joke or two.

Dinosaur Revolution (2011)

This is a bit of an odd one, and it might or might not be your jam, but it certainly is mine. It is essentially a mashup between a dinosaur documentary and dinosaur Looney Tunes. Very silly slapstick segments focussing on specific dinosaurs with somewhat anthropomorphic behaviours get intercut with scientists explaining the latest of 2011 paleontology. The animation is a bit naff but the designs are really good and there’s a lot of feathers. It highlights behavioural traits like intelligence and parental care a lot. Two of its episodes cover pretty much the whole Mesozoic in no particular order, two episodes do Walking With Dinosaurs style covering of a single animal’s story in a single ecosystem. Shunosaurus eats mushrooms and has a bad trip. Lots of mammals go flying after getting thrown about. In a true Blackadder Goes Forth type pivot, the final episode of this very silly slapsticky show has the most haunting and tragic depiction of the K-Pg extinction I’ve ever seen.

#prehistoric planet #walking with dinosaurs #prehistoric park #when dinosaurs roamed america #dinosaur revolution #dinosaur documentaries #feel free to add more

[xobrattymoonxo]

A New Version of Daddy

TW: Non-con, psedo- incest, like one spank, forced impregnation, semi yandere, mentions of kiddnaping

Matsukawa x fem!reader

Summary: Y/n catches her step father doing something bad ;)

AN: Part of a collab for @hanmas sorry this is a gazzilion years late!! Also I made a discord server for my dark content!! I have an age robot in my server so feel free to joinif you are 18+ !!

Gen Taglist: Open!

Word count 1.2k

Third Person Pov

Her small chubby fingers wrapped around the balls as she moved quicker. Her heart was beating faster and faster. The sweat dripped down her face. She licked the corners of her mouth as she continued. Bent over for everyone to see exactly what she was up too under those bleachers. 

“Y/n are you done yet? I want to go home.” A girl whined from outside of the bleachers. 

“Yeah I was just grabbing the last ball. It rolled under the bleachers somehow.” 

Matsukawa watched the young girl walk closer as he felt his pants grow tight.

“Hey Dad! Where’s mom?” Y/n asked as she caught up to him. 

“Oh she couldn’t make it tonight boo, but you did great!” Matsukawa said to her. 

“Yeah cause being the ball girl is so hard Dad.” Y/n laughed.  

“You should really try out next summer, Y/n. I’m sure the coach would love to see your skills!” 

“I’m too busy with work and my summer semester, Yukie.” Y/n laughed. 

Yukie and Y/n were just finishing up a semester at Tokyo University. The two were now on summer break but Y/n chose to do more school. 

Matsukawa cleared his throat as he watched the two jump in the back seat of his car. He drove to drop Yukie off listening to the girls giggle and talk about the hot guys on their campus. Matsukawa couldn't help but to feel jealous of the boys y/n spoke about.

After Matsukawa dropped off Yukie, Y/n jumped in the front seat. Matsukawa adjusted himself, still hard as a rock. 

“Hey Dad?”

“What's up, boo?” 

“Do you think Mom cares anymore about us? She’s never around for anything. I get not showing up to see your kid be a ball girl, but I mean she didn’t even show up to my Dean’s list ceremony at school last week.” 

“She means well boo, I know she does.” He said using his signature nickname for y/n once again. 

“If you say so, Dad.” 

The two drove in silence for a bit till Y/n spoke up again.

“I can’t imagine you two are still in love after her always being off who knows where. Heck I can only imagine how many other men she's slept with in just the last 10 years.” 

“Excuse me?” Matsukawa asked with a hint of anger.  

“Think about how many business trips she's taken all these years. It's just common sense.”

The car pulled to a halt. 

“Get out and walk home.” Matsukawa spat. He wasn’t necessarily angry she had called out her mother like so, it was more of the disrespect to him that he was mad about. 

“No! Fuck that!” Y/n spat, crossing her arms.  

“Get the fuck OUT OF MY CAR!” He screamed in her face. 

“You’re not my real Dad. I don’t have to listen to you.” She mocked. 

“I’ve been the only Dad you’ve known since you were 14. Therefore you have to listen to me. I am your father.” 

“Gross. I am only getting out cause I want to.” She said as she slammed the door.  

Matsukawa thought back on his drive home how the fight was completely pointless. He wasn’t mad y/n’s mom wasn’t around, in fact he was much more interested in y/n. Ever since she went off to college something changed about her that he liked. Something about her breasts in all those low cut shirts and her ass in those booty shorts she always wore around the house. He felt himself getting hard once again. 

“Fuck” He siad to himself in the emty vehicle. 

He pulled up in front of their small home and exited his car. He rushed inside racing up to his bedroom. Forgetting to lock his bedroom door, he whipped off his pants and began to stroke his cock. 

Y/n was still walking home, when it started to rain out of nowhere. 

“Come on! You can’t give me one win today? This is so damn cliche.” She shouted at the sky. 

The rain poured buckets down on her as she trudged home. By the time she walked up to the door she was freezing and wet.  

Y/n threw off her shoes and dripped up the stairs to Matsukawa’s room. 

She slammed Matsukawa’s door open just as he let out a moan calling for y/n.  

“Umm…. It’s not what it looks like?” Matsukawa said, cock still in hand.  

“Well it looks like you were beating your meat to your step daughter.” Y/n replied sassily. 

“I mean… yes? But also no?” Matsukawa said, sounding unsure of himself.  

Y/n looked down at her wet clothes and back to Matsukawa’s cock. 

“Oh fuck this.” She said, about to leave the room. “I’m calling mom.” 

The last three words sparked something in Matsukawa. He couldn’t have her mother find out, not only would she think its creepy but she might call the cops on him and get a restraining order. He could not be without y/n.  

Matsukawa moved quickly on his feet and over to where the soaking wet Y/n was. He grabbed her by the hips and slammed her against the wall, taking the phone from her hand. He threw the phone across the room as he grabbed onto her neck. 

“You listen here you little bitch. I raised you as my own for years and I have put up with your disrespect. From this moment forward you will only refer to me as daddy.” 

Matsukawa ripped off her uniform shirt in one swift tug. He pulled down her shorts and panties, leaving her only in a bra. He let go of her neck as he unclasped her bra. 

“Please… I won’t tell mom.” Y/n said through tears. 

“Oh I know you won’t. Now get on the bed on all fours like a good little bitch.” He ordered. 

Y/n shook her head no. Matsukawa felt his anger build up even more. He grabbed her arm as he roughly tossed her at the bed. She just missed as she slipped and fell just ver the side of the bed. 

“This works too since you don’t want to listen.” 

He grabbed his belt from the nightstand and quickly wrapped it around both of her wrists. She whimpered out at the tightness. Now that he was resting against her, she could feel how big his cock really was. She felt him shuffle around, lining up the tip with her pussy. 

“Please Issei… It won’t fit.” She babbled out. 

She felt a heavy hand land hard down on her right ass cheek. 

“I told you it was Daddy from now on, you bitch.” 

She sniffled in response. He stood there, teasing her entrance listening to her whine out for a few minutes. Just when she began to calm her crying down, he slammed into her with his entire length. Y/n cried out,

“Ple-please no.” She begged. He began to move at a rough pace, taking almost his entire length out before slamming his massive cock back in. “Sto-stop.” 

“Tell me bitch, do your college boys fuck you this good? I know the answer is no.” Matsukawa felt himself getting close. “I’m gonna cum inside you and make you carry my child.” He whispered in her ear just before he came. Y/n felt her stomach swell up from dubious amount of cum inside of her. 

Matsukawa grabbed Y/n by the hips and tossed her up on the bed. He climbed up beside her sobbing figure and wrapped his arms around her. Her arms were still tied behind her back. 

“Just gonna stay like this for now…. at least till I am ready to put you in the basement.” 

“What…why?” She asked through tears.  

“Cause you are never leaving me. Your mom will never find you, you’ll never see your friends again, and I have the perfect plan to make sure that happens…. I can’t wait for little Issei jr.” He said right as he kissed Y/n on the lips. 

#haikyuu dark content #tw noncon #tw dark fic #haikyuu smut #tw dubcon #yandere haikyuu #bnha smut #bnha dark content #tw dubious consent #tw dark content #discord server #brattymoon masterlist💗

[nori-writes]

Awaited Arival

Cassidy x Reader

Summary: Just Cole returning home after a long mission away from reader.

W/C: 650+

You and Cassidy were both accustomed to not seeing each other for days on end, it was your job as agents. You both managed and did still have a successful relationship, making time for one another whenever you could. However, the other day over dinner Cole had mentioned that he’d be out longer than normal this time around but you never expected that to turn into multiple weeks of your boyfriend being absent.

You missed him, you really did and it showed. Indulging yourself in things from his side of the wardrobe mostly his poncho but that's because it always carried his smell of cigars, gunpowder and whiskey, a mixture of smells you never thought you’d come to miss this much.

You stood in the kitchen making yourself a dinner with one of Cole’s old hoodies draped over your body, making you look tiny, it kept you comfort, at least you knew he was alive. But, within your shared relationship with the man this was the longest you've gone without talking to him.

Putting the food you made onto a plate you sat down at the dining table in the dark with the only light being the moonlight that shone through a small kitchen window along with the light above the stove that stayed on. You sat in silence picking at your food, eating it slowly, staring out the small window watching the silhouette of a squirrel that scurried around the tree before calming.

You were snapped out of your trance, hearing some rustling from the doorway of the kitchen, you hadn’t heard the door open so had someone made their way in? Or were you too busy staring out the window to even hear or notice that the front door had even been opened. You looked up as the light flipped on to reveal your boyfriend standing in the doorway, obviously beaten, bruised and tired but most of all grateful to be back home with you.

“Aw, Darlin’ were you missin’ me that much?” He said through a small laugh, all you could do was wear a small smile back at him though, “How’s it been ‘round here with me gone?”

Setting down the fork you were holding you got up walking over to him wrapping your arms around him and putting your head into his chest enveloping in his presence while he intertwined his hands into the strands of your hair, running his fingers through, “I’ve missed you,” you said as a mumble into his chest.

“I know pumpkin, I know,” He took a pause, placing a kiss onto the top of your head, “How about we get you into bed and I’ll join you as soon as I finish showering?”

You nodded at the idea, it sounded nice, “That sounds good,” you said, pulling yourself out of him, “I’ll see you when you’re done, alright?”

“Of course honey,” he told you, kissing the top of your head, “You go get situated in bed and when I’m done we can watch that one movie we were talking about before I left.”

Nodding, you happily made your way back to the room that you both shared, coddling yourself within the blankets that were there, and turning on the movie to the first scene for when Cole was out and back. As if on cue, your lover walked into the room, sweatpants on he sat in the spot next to you finding your hand in the mess of blankets, to intertwine your fingers together.

“Finally get to get a good night's sleep now that you’re here.” He smiled at you.

“Glad to hear,” You smiled back, snuggling yourself into Cole, forgetting about the movie completely, just glad to be able to envelop in your lover's presence again.

Slowly as you drifted off to sleep in your lover's arms you heard him whisper a couple sweet words to you, “I love you, darlin’. Glad to be home with you again.”

A/N: Woo first Overwatch upload! I literally love this man so much 🧡❤️

Please do also to feel free to send in a request if my box is open! My rules are here and, if you like what I write and would like some more my master list is here!

#overwatch #overwatch x reader #overwatch x you #cole cassidy #overwatch cassidy #cassidy x reader #cassidy overwatch #overwatch fic #overwatch fanfiction #overwatch imagines #overwatch fluff #fluff

[curiositymemes]

ATLAS : ENNEAGRAM SENTENCE STARTERS.

taken from the 2019 album released by sleeping at last, consisting of songs based on the nine enneagram personality types. feel free to change wording and pronouns and provide context as necessary. do not add to this list.

ONE.

“hold on for a minute.”

“i believe that we can fix this over time.”

“let me finish.”

“we’ll only know for certain if we try.”

“i want to sing a song worth singing.”

“i’ll write an anthem worth repeating.”

“now i have learned my lesson.”

“i’ve spent my whole life searching desperately.”

“grace requires nothing of me.”

TWO.

“sweetheart, you look a little tired.”

“when did you last eat?”

“come in and make yourself right at home.”

“stay as long as you need.”

“tell me, is there something wrong?”

“you can count on me.”

“you know i’ll take my heart clean apart if it helps yours beat.”

“let me take your coat.”

“i will love you with every single thing i have.”

“i will love you without any strings attached.”

“it’s okay if you can’t catch your breath.”

“no, i don’t want to talk about myself.”

“tell me where it hurts.”

“you’re good as new.”

“i don’t even know where to start.”

“i just want to love you.”

“i just want to learn how, somehow, to be loved myself.”

“and what a privilege it is to love, a great honor to hold you up.”

“i will love you without a single string attached.”

THREE.

“maybe i’ve done enough.”

“your golden child grew up.”

“maybe this trophy isn’t real love.”

“with or without it, i’m good enough.”

“i finally see myself through the eyes of no one else.”

“it’s so exhausting on this silver screen, where i play the role of anyone but me.”

“i finally see myself unabridged and overwhelmed.”

“a mess of a story i’m ashamed to tell.”

“i only want what’s real.”

“let my heart feel what it feels.”

“he’s/she’s/they’re/we’re/you’re/i’m worthy of love anyway.”

FOUR.

“i’m turning out the lights.”

“remember how to see?”

“for a moment we get to be glorious.”

“maybe i’m hiding behind metaphor.”

“maybe my heart needs to break to be sure.”

“i’ve fallen in love with a ghost.”

“i lost my balance when i needed it most.”

“this blurry photograph is proof.”

“it feels like truth.”

“i’m stuck swimming in shadows.”

“it’s been forever since i came up for air.”

“what if we already are who we’ve been dying to become?”

“a reflection of magnificence.”

“(it’s) hidden in you, maybe even in me.”

FIVE.

“i want to watch the universe expand.”

“i want to break it into pieces small enough to understand.”

“it feels like an out-of-body experience.”

“now i can’t put my mind to rest.”

“i can’t help but second guess.”

“i’m hypnotized by this anomaly.”

“such strange uncharted territory.”

“my armor falls apart.”

“if i could let myself be seen, even deeply known.”

“i was already brave enough to let go.”

“it’s hidden in heartbeats, exhales, and in the hope of open hands.”

SIX.

“i had the most vivid dream.”

“my feet had left the ground.”

“i was floating to heaven.”

“i could only look down.”

“my mind was heavy, running ragged with worst case scenarios.”

“i woke up so worried.”

“oh god, i’m so tired of being afraid.”

“if i’m being honest, i’m not sure i’d know how.”

“i wanna take shelter but i’m ready to fight.”

“i feel a little paralyzed.”

“maybe i’m stronger than i realize.”

“i want to believe; no, i choose to believe.”

“fear won’t go away, but i can keep it at bay.”

“with a vigilant heart, i’ll push into the dark.”

“i’ll learn to breathe deep and make peace with the stars.”

“is it courage or faith?”

“there will be light always waiting behind even the darkest of nights.”

“no matter what.”

“somehow we’ll be okay.”

“don’t be afraid.”

SEVEN.

“we could try everything.”

“i’m serious.”

“what about danger?”

“so what?”

“what about risk?”

“i’m restless for whatever comes next.”

“how wonderful to see a smile on your face.”

“a welcome home parade.”

“a secret handshake.”

“i’ll find the silver lining no matter what the price.”

“i’m hungry for whatever comes next.”

“let me tell you another secret of the trade.”

“it feels like sinking when i’m standing in one place.”

“i want to be here.”

“i feel hope, deep in my bones.”

“tomorrow will be beautiful.”

“i’m ready for whatever comes next.”

EIGHT.

“it was like a switch was flipped.”

“i was just a kid who grew up strong enough.”

“god, that was so long ago.”

“i was little, i was weak and perfectly naive.”

“i grew up too quick.”

“now you won’t see all that i have to lose and all i’ve lost in the fight to protect it.”

“i won’t let you in, i swore never again.”

“i can’t afford, no, i refuse to be rejected.”

“i want to break these bones ‘til they’re better.”

“you were wrong.”

“my healing needed more than time.”

“when i see fragile things, helpless things, broken things, i see the familiar.”

“now i’m a broken mirror.”

“i can’t afford to let myself be blindsided.”

“i’m standing guard.”

“i’m falling apart.”

“all i want is to trust you.”

“show me how to lay my sword down.”

“here i am.”

“pry me open.”

“what do you want to know?”

“i’m just a kid who grew up scared enough.”

“here’s a map, here’s a shovel.”

“here’s my achilles’ heel.”

“i’m all in.”

“i’m at your mercy now.”

“i’m ready to begin.”

“i am strong enough to let you in.”

“for the innocent, for the vulnerable.”

“i’ll show up at the front lines with a purpose.”

“i’ll give all i have.”

“i’m shattered porcelain, glued back together again.”

“i’m invincible like i’ve never been.”

NINE.

“who am i to say what any of this means?”

“i have been sleepwalking since i was fourteen.”

“honestly, it’s easier to let myself forget.”

“i’ve been less than half myself for more than half my life.”

“wake up.”

“fall in love again.”

“there’s so much worth fighting for, you’ll see.”

“it looks like empathy to understand all sides.”

“i’m just trying to find myself through someone else’s eyes.”

“show me what to do.”

“how do i forgive myself for losing so much time?”

“roll up your sleeves.”

“remember who you are.”

“a little at a time.”

“it’s uncomfortable, but right.”

“we were born to try to see each other through.”

“to know and love ourselves and others well is the most difficult and meaningful work we’ll ever do.”

#rp meme #roleplay meme #sentence starters #dialog prompts #dialogue prompts #ask meme #writing prompts #roleplay prompts #ask prompts #rp prompts #roleplay prompt #fluff #romance #angst #long post tw #long post #atlas enneagram #food mention tw #food tw #injury tw #drowning tw #war tw #broken bone tw #dissociation tw #religion tw #fun fact!! i cannot listen to nine without crying #it's my enneagram and it Hits Different