#when i tell you i almost had a heart attack like four times....

[stayevildarling]

I know you've already done something similar, but I'm wondering if you can write a billie, delia, and mina fic with reader who gets attacked and ends up forgetting things like who her gfs are and where she is? Maybe you can add your own ideas to it if ur up to it? Thank you <33

Cordelia Goode x Wilhemina Venable x Billie Dean Howard x Reader- Closure

A/N: Hi there ❣️ I apologise for the delay with this on. I have been a bit sick and busy. This is really long but I couldn't make it any shorter.

tw: mention of blood, mention of doctors and hospitals, mention of amnesia, cursing, smoking, lots of angst

word count: 11k 😅

taglist:

@lunaticwhittaker, @billiebeanhoward, @lanawinters-ily, @kenzbro, @minaslittleone, @httpfiftyshadesofgay, @whitelotus00, @ninaahs, @vintagepaulson, @isle-of-earle, @paulsonsratched, @stepintomyworld, @grilledcheeseandguavajelly, @lucyintheskywithxanax, @fanfics4world, @mymiraclewitch, @hazard-to-myself, @awritersometime, @ohrwurm26, @wastdstime

It had been a normal day at the academy, a busy weekday really, the four of you going on about your days, Cordelia mostly in her office working on academy business, Wilhemina at work and returning a little while ago, you mostly teaching classes and spending your afternoon in the greenhouse, Billie equally at work. At last, you find yourself in the comfort of your girlfriends arms, the four of you snuggled up together by the fireplace, the tv running softly in the background, drawing out the outside noises from the busy streets, some laughter still coming from some of the witches rooms.

As you glance around you, you notice Delia sitting beside you, holding you closely as the two of you are snuggled in a blanket, Wilhemina sitting in her armchair, doing some knitting, her eyes occasionally glancing at you three, the view warming her heart and causing the ever so smallest smile to coat her features. A sudden movement startles you a little, Billie Dean disappearing into the darkness of the night again as she leaves for a smoke, this time unannounced and you can't help but notice how this must have been her third cigarette within twenty minutes, and equally Cordelia watches her leave, Wilhemina's brows furrowing as usually she announced her little smoking breaks.

And as you think about it a little further, you remember how agitated Billie seemed today, unusually quiet at dinner and not sharing any details about her day, like she usually would. And then it kinda dawns on you how fidgety she had been, how she had barely said any words and the revelation causes you to jolt in Cordelia's arms. Her brown eyes meet yours, concern washing over her, before she speaks softly ,,Sweetheart, are you okay?'' she asks, almost a little confused, noticing how tense you suddenly seem. ,,I'm worried about Billie'' you announce, ignoring the voice in your head telling you not to share your concern with them, not wanting to worry them in the process. Cordelia remains silent as she glances at Wilhemina, and as their eyes lock they share a silent understanding. Despite Cordelia being the supreme, you had an odd connection with the three women, somehow always noticing whenever something was wrong.

Cordelia had tried to solve that puzzle many times, whether it was simply your intuition, whether it was simply the love you share for them and how observant you are. However she had questioned how you almost always seem to get it right, always instantly by Wilhemina's side as your senses alerted you of her pains, always by Cordelia's side whenever some danger was looming over the usual safe walls of the academy, sometimes knowing before she did. And you often knew when something was bothering the medium too, when everything was getting a little much for her. And despite never solving the puzzle regarding your senses, she knows that you must be right, also having noticed how agitated, nervous and quiet Billie had been all evening.

And before too long, the medium returns, opting for the other armchair, despite her sitting beside Cordelia moments before, her loud mind causing her to not be focused, to forget already. ,,Billie honey?'' Cordelia tries softly, drawing the medium away from her thoughts. ,,Is everything okay darling?'' she tries, tilting her head a little as three sets of concerned eyes meet the mediums. And she hesitates then, playing with her acrylic nails as a nervous habit, her mouth opening before she physically stops herself, biting the words back. ,,Billie?'' Wilhemina tries now as concern washes over her as well, never having seen Billie like this despite the many battles the medium had thought over the years, including battles with the redhead but always coming out stronger in the end.

,,It's- it's nothing'' Billie tries but her attempt is pathetic as tears already swell in her eyes, Cordelia quick on her feet to kneel beside the medium, taking her shaking hands into her steady ones. ,,Darling, please, what is it?'' the supreme tries, her eyes pleading with her, grounding her and giving her safety to share whatever this was. ,,It's work'' she finally admits, sighing in the process as she lets a tear stream down her cheek. And as you glance at Wilhemina, your features filled with pain, you both know this was serious. Billie never spoke too much about her work, only the nice parts really, including the promo tours, the fun bits of it, never the hauntings, never the ghosts. The same hauntings, ghosts and spirits that often kept her awake at night, causing her to have terrible nightmares, and the three of you often shushing her back to sleep in the end.

,,It's really bad'' she admits, more to herself than either of you and Wilhemina slowly abandons her knitting supplies, you equally abandoning your spot on the comfortable sofa, before walking over to your girlfriend and placing the same blanket that had provided you warmth and safety to her now. ,,Tell us honey'' Cordelia instructs before Billie begins slowly filling you in. Telling you three about her worst gig yet, how despite having seen everything by now she couldn't crack this one, how there was some connection to witches. How she assumes they are satanic witches who are trapped here and haunting a family, how she has been scared to go to work for the past few days, as all her methods failed. You glance at Cordelia when she mentions witches, wondering whether maybe you and the supreme could help out all things considered.

,,It's okay honey, come here'' Cordelia softly offers as soon as Billie finishes, pulling the medium into her arms as your hands softly reach out to hold the mediums, rubbing your thumb in little circles to keep her feeling safe and sound. ,,Billie?'' Wilhemina tries after a while, after the medium had mostly calmed down. ,,Are you gonna make fun of me?'' Billie chuckles through tears, not used to let her guard down like this, especially around all of you at the same time. Wilhemina's features soften then, almost frowning ,,Of course not'' she speaks calmly ,,We are here for you'' she speaks again and it almost causes for you to cry, knowing your Mina had a hard time with these sort of things.

,,Delia?'' you ask, getting her attention as she glances at you ,,I'm sure we can help'' you urge, pleading with her through your eyes. The supreme hesitates, knowing it was probably possible her being the supreme and also having the gift of mediumship that comes with her powers but knowing this was dangerous, after all if Billie was correct and if they truly had some satanic connections. As she glances around the room, she catches a glimpse of Billie who's eyes plead in desperation and so the blonde can't help but agreeing. ,,Can you take me there tomorrow?'' Cordelia asks and is met with a gasp of relief from the medium, who nods her head gratefully. ,,How about we get you to bed for now honey?'' Cordelia tries and Billie simply nods, before the four of you ascend the stairs, getting ready for your individual evening routines and eventually finding each other in bed.

That night you don't manage to get a lot of sleep, worried about your lover who tossed and turned a lot, awoken by a nightmare a couple of times but the three of you were quick by her side, holding her gently through the terrors of the night. And eventually, you give up on the idea of sleep, softly extracting from bed and wrapping a blanket around you before hiding away in the comfort of the greenhouse, glancing through some of Cordelia's books, hoping you could find something that could help out. After countless hours, the sun already rising a while ago, you are lost in several books about satanic rituals, witches and their history, quite taken back as you hadn't really learned about this type of magic before.

Cordelia eventually finds you, watching from the door where she lingers, softly smiling at you sitting crossed leg on the floor, several books around you. ,,Sweetie?'' she startles you, causing you to jolt a little. And then as you watch her approach, looking ethereal as ever in one of her flower dresses, it dawns on you, how long you had been gone, how tired you are from the lack of sleep. ,,What are you up to in here?'' she asks, glancing at the books. ,,Just some reading'' you explain yourself, quickly up on your feet before she presses a soft kiss to your lips, noticing the little bags under your eyes and guessing you- alike her, didn't get too much sleep the night prior.

Taking her hand, you follow her inside the academy again, the witches already having begun their days, going on about their tasks, as you find both Billie and Wilhemina in the kitchen, already dressed for the day while you stand there still in your pyjamas, blanket wrapped around your shoulders. ,,Where are you going?'' you ask a little confused, noticing they are all dressed to go somewhere, Wilhemina's car keys dangling from her hand. ,,We are going with Billie sweetheart'' Cordelia softly announces, her features a little tense as she knows the argument that is about to follow. ,,Wait- give me five minutes'' you announce, getting ready to sprint upstairs but Cordelia stops you. ,,Sweetie'' she tries and by the hint of guilt in her eyes you know she doesn't want you to go.

,,I need you to stay here sweetie'' she tries but you are quick to shake your head. ,,No way'' you announce, pleading with both Billie and Wilhemina, hoping they are easier to convince at times. ,,Darling it's far too dangerous'' Cordelia explains, her features stern. ,,No Delia I don't care, I'm not letting you three go alone'' you protest before Wilhemina steps forward. ,,Little one'' she tries but you are having none of it, matching the redheads usual stubbornness. ,,Why are you going but not me?'' you question and as you glance at Billie's and Cordelia's face it suddenly dawns on you. How they always seemed to coddle you, treat you like a child as if you aren't worthy of this, not worthy of adult things, of dangerous things despite being a witch and knowing how to protect yourself. ,,Please sweetie, I need you to look after the girls and coven'' Cordelia pleads and you have always had a hard time to deny her or them of anything and so slowly you cave in.

,,We will be right back, promise babydoll'' Billie announces, pressing a kiss to your cheeks. ,,Please be safe'' you beg, before Cordelia hugs you from the side, pulling you into her arms and pressing a kiss to your cheeks. ,,Promise little one'' Wilhemina announces with a smile before you watch the three of them leave. You glance around the kitchen, noticing how you must have missed breakfast and so you opt for getting ready for your day, afterwards checking the schedule for today and how neither you nor Cordelia are due for teaching today. And so the only thing you can do is pace around Cordelia's office, hating the fact that you didn't insist on going, how the three of them could be in danger, trusting both the supreme and mediums gift with all of your heart and knowing Wilhemina was tough but after everything you had read last night, thoughts of panic and concern still crash through you, causing you to hyperventilate a little.

Meanwhile, your girlfriends had made it to the house, Wilhemina had promised to stay outside, the only way Cordelia would agree on letting her drive them. And as soon as the supreme steps foot in the house, none of Billie's crew present as they insisted on investigating this without cameras, she can sense the lost and trapped dangerous spirits. ,,Follow me'' Billie tries, leading the supreme up the stairs and to the room where she had set up several of her failed methods. Cordelia's head begins pounding and aching with their screams as they must sense that a witch had entered the house, among her ranks despite a very different form of magic. As the medium enters one of the rooms, Cordelia inspects carefully, her hands hovering nearby the walls, trying to see if there was anything she could do, a spell she could cast or trying to figure out what the spirits may want and need to move on.

What all of them are unaware of though, is that the lost souls had no intention of moving on, of stopping the haunting of the poor family who had recently moved in. All they wanted was revenge, revenge for the way they had tragically been killed, despite that being by neither of the people affected by their hauntings. As Cordelia glances around, she feels a wave of discomfort course through her veins, their screams causing for her head to ache further, Billie equally shaking with their torture. And just like they intended, they managed to get into your girlfriends heads, using their magic to cause the only thing they had meant to do, cause agony and pain upon the innocent.

And as you continue pacing, you suddenly feel like losing your balance, your ears ringing as you hear an agonising scream, and it wasn't just any scream, it was Billie, the medium screaming for help and as your eyes widen, you are quick to force them shut, using your magic abilities to teleport to your girlfriends, panic rippling through your body. Wilhemina's eyes widen as you suddenly appear in front of her, your face filled with fear and panic. ,,Little one?'' she tries ,,Where is she?'' your shaky voice ripples through the air. ,,I heard Billie scream'' you announce, before brushing past her, quickly entering the house. ,,Y/N wait'' Wilhemina tries, confusion washing over her features.

Wilhemina watches as you try to ascend the stairs, taking a few steps before an invisible force takes over, causing you to fly up and down the stairs, as your body floats at first, Wilhemina's heart stopping in her chest. And then it all stops as your scared eyes meet the redheads before you are thrown across the room, the spirits enjoying their little game. A loud bang startles both Cordelia and Billie who are unaware of what had unfolded, their eyes meeting for a second before they run downstairs, finding you in front of Wilhemina on the floor, her expression filled with panic.

,,Y/N'' Billie shouts, seeing your lifeless body on the floor ,,What happened?'' Cordelia asks, glancing at Wilhemina who remains frozen, before she kneels down, taking your head into her hands, her hands quickly staining with blood. ,,She suddenly appeared and said she heard you scream Billie'' Wilhemina explains. Billie's eyes widen in shock ,,I didn't scream...Cordelia it's the spirits, we need to get out of here'' she ushers and the supreme is quick to agree.

The blonde is quick to take you into her arms, before running towards the car, putting you in the back seat before taking a seat and holding you in her arms. Wilhemina rushes to the drivers seat, Billie beside her before she starts the car. The supreme is quick to cast a few spells, trying to stop the bleeding, trying to heal you but she quickly notices that it must be more serious than this, considering her efforts are not working as the blood still poured and the colour fades more and more from your features with each passing moment. ,,We need to get her to a hospital now'' she ushers, Billie hysterically crying in the front, glancing at you and blaming herself for ever bringing her girlfriends there in the first place.

Wilhemina's determination quickly kicks in as she drives faster, focused to get you to the nearest hospital as quickly as possible. ,,Sweetie'' Cordelia tries, brushing her blood stained hands against your cheeks. ,,Y/N'' she ushers but you can't respond as the battle of unconsciousness had won a long time ago. Tears mingle in each of their eyes, Wilhemina glancing in the mirror as panic sets in, seeing you like this. Within minutes, the redhead has you in front of the nearest hospital, having ushered Billie to call ahead and as Cordelia exits the car, still holding your lifeless body in her hands, there are already some doctors and nurses waiting for you, quickly transporting you onto a gurney and rushing you inside.

The wait feels like an eternity, a lifetime of pain and memories, as the three of them pace back and forth in one of the waiting rooms where one of the nurses had escorted them to. Billie sits curled up in one of the chairs, occasionally pacing around as tears blurry her vision. Wilhemina remains standing, despite the sprain on her back, not caring about her back as all she could think about was you, Cordelia pacing back and forth, her thoughts clouded by the possibility of losing you. And as time passes on, you linger on their mind as the doctors work their magic on fixing your injuries. Cordelia keeps thinking over and over when you first joined the academy, how captivated she had been by you, at last a witch who was experienced, who she barely needed to teach anymore. How she often found you in the greenhouse as it had become your sanctuary, how sweet and polite you had been, often asking if you could borrow some of her books, how she had taught you potions a few times as that wasn't your strong suits.

She thinks back of introducing you to the other two, how your eyes sparkled, more with each moment you spent with them. How slowly you captivated all their hearts, despite Billie unsure about another person but quickly falling for her babydoll. The medium can't help feeling guilty, how she should have never told you, thinking back to all the times she had held you in her arms, how lately she hadn't done that enough, how she hadn't spoiled you in so long as her work had left her in a daze. And Wilhemina can't help but blame herself for how she didn't stop you when you walked in, regretting not having held you or kissed you before they had left. Thinking back to all of those nights where neither of you could sleep, either you finding her in the library or her finding you reading in the greenhouse, how the two of you would often read to each other, lulling each other to sleep as she would hold you close, thinking about how you truly opened up her heart.

,,How is she?'' Cordelia's voice rings through the air as she sees one of the doctors appear, startling the other two in the process and causing for the thoughts and memories to stop for a moment. ,,She's stable'' he explains, three gasps of relief echoing through the quiet room. ,,She just needed some stitches, we assume the shock and impact caused her to lose consciousness'' he carries on explaining. ,,We are just waiting for some scans but if it stays like that, she should be observed for a few days and then good to return home'' he announces before excusing himself again to finish his tests. ,,Thank you so much'' Cordelia whispers, tears lingering in their eyes, tears of relief.

,,Thank god'' Wilhemina announces, the other two meeting her brown eyes. ,,I'm so sorry'' Billie suddenly cries, startling the two, before she breaks down. ,,I should have never said anything, taken you there'' she apologises, feeling terrible as the thought of losing you causes her to lose her balance. Cordelia is quick to guide her to a nearby chair, taking her tear stained cheeks into her soft hands ,,Honey.. Honey it's okay, she's fine'' the supreme coos, Wilhemina taking a deep breath, having a hard time seeing any of her girlfriends like this. ,,We will be just fine'' Cordelia reassures, trying to coax the medium out of her state.

It takes another while, before one of the nurses guides them to a room, where you lay, asleep from the effects the drugs had on your body. ,,The scans confirm no damage'' one of the doctors returns, causing them to again gasp in relief. ,,I suggest keeping her for monitoring but she should be just fine'' he announces. Wilhemina steps forward, glancing at both Cordelia and Billie before speaking ,,Can we take her home?'' she asks, more her girlfriends than the doctor really. ,,She hates hospitals and if it's simply a matter of observing her, we can do just that'' she tries, noticing how you aren't attached to any machines anymore, how you are simply asleep, how you simply had stitches and no surgery that required any further actions.

Cordelia glances at Billie before she glances at the doctor and nurse, a little unsure whether that would be the best idea. ,,If that's what you would prefer, we are happy to provide you with some pain medication for her once she wakes, and if you have any concern or questions you can of course call or come back anytime'' he assures and that's all the confirmation your girlfriends need. As Wilhemina settles the details with the nurses, the doctor approaches you, as you finally open your eyes. ,,How are you feeling Miss?'' he questions and you struggle a little at first, with the bright sensation and the lingering pain but you quickly adapt to your surroundings ,,Fine, a little sore'' you admit and he nods in understanding before releasing you.

,,I'm so glad you are awake sweetie'' Cordelia smiles at you softly, having made a plan with Billie and Wilhemina to distract the nurses for a moment while getting your release papers and medications so she could teleport you back into the coven, figuring that may be easier given the circumstances. And with a swift motion she has you back where you belong, inside your shared bedroom, ushering you to bed before sleep washes over you again. While the supreme watches over your sleeping form, she worries whether bringing you home was the best idea, despite the events she knows your injuries don't seem serious and she also knows how hard it was for your other two girlfriends to constantly be around hospitals and doctors, given Wilhemina's trauma from those and the spirits in the hospital, making it hard for the medium and Cordelia equally. While awaiting for the other twos return, she tries calming herself, knowing that the three of them could certainly provide the best care for you.

Both Billie and Mina return within the next while, Cordelia sitting by your side, watching your chest rise and fall softly, not for once leaving your side. And when they both return, their faces soften seeing you asleep safe and sound. ,,How is she?'' Billie asks before walking over to Cordelia, her features still filled with guilt for what had happened. ,,Fine darling, she's just been sleeping'' the supreme reassures, before the three of them just take a moment to breathe after the dramatic turn of events from today. In the end they opt for taking turns, Cordelia the first one to leave for a while in order to look after the coven for a while and check on the girls, giving some of her classes for tomorrow to Zoe, so she could look after you. Next, Wilhemina retreats for a little, opting for a bath and change of clothes after the events from today, Billie the last one to shower and get changed before returning.

It's late afternoon when you awaken next, your eyes slowly opening after hearing some hushed voices, the bright sensation from the white room causing you to squint them shut, the remaining pain in your heard still lingering. After trying again, your throat feels on fire a little as you try glancing around the room. Billie is by your side straight away, smiling at you, almost beaming a little to finally see you awake. ,,How are you feeling?'' she asks, her voice ringing through the air causing your head to pound a little. ,,Wa'' you try to speak but the pain overwhelms you for a second as you force your eyes to close again. ,,May I have some water please?'' you try again, the request coming out quiet and broken.

,,Of course babydoll'' Billie ushers, reaching for the glass of water by your beside that Cordelia had placed there a while ago. The supreme by the other side of the bed, smiling at you, Wilhemina sitting a few steps away from you in an armchair. The sip of water feels like relief as it cools down the burning sensation in your throat. ,,Thank you nurse'' you speak again after handing her back the glass with shaky hands. Billie raises her eyebrow, chuckling to herself as she sets the glass back down. ,,Is there anything else I can get for my favourite patient?'' she chuckles again, Cordelias features soft and a smirk tugging at Wilhemina's lips as they enjoy your little joke.

,,No thank you'' you reply politely before turning to the other woman sitting beside you ,,What's the prognosis then doctor?'' you ask, assuming that the other blonde must be your doctor. ,,Yes Doctor, what's the prognosis?'' Wilhemina mockingly jokes, giving you a little wink, still assuming you are joking. ,,You will be just fine sweetheart'' she states, her hand brushing over your arm and rubbing little circles on it in a comforting matter, causing for your eyebrows to furrow a little. ,,But when can I leave?'' you ask, mistaking your bedroom for a hospital room as everything is still a little blurry and there is a lot of white.

,,What do you mean sweetie?'' Cordelia asks confused, scanning your features before Wilhemina is already up on her feet, noticing how this wasn't a joke, how this had never been a joke, her expression deadly serious as she approaches. ,,Little one, this isn't funny'' she urges, her features stern, causing you to feel even more confused. ,,Do you know where you are?'' Billie asks, her eyes already brimming with tears. You reluctantly look at the blonde woman who you assume to be your doctor before she speaks again ,,Do you know what happened?''. You try to think for a moment, remembering a man talking to you before in a room that looked quite different now that you are thinking about it. ,,Do you know your name?'' the woman asks again, causing one of the other two to scoff at the ridiculousness of her question. And then it kinda dawns on you how you aren't aware of anything really, you didn't know where you are, what happened or who you are, as if your memories had been wiped completely.

,,No'' you whisper, and by your statement you can tell that those people aren't doctors or nurses as their reactions felt way more personal than that. Wilhemina's eyes force close as she takes a shaky breath, her heart beating fast and aching with pain. Billie's face is stained with tears as they keep pouring, her hand still holding onto yours, squeezing it a little tighter as if she wanted to comfort you, despite you feeling the strange urge to comfort her, despite not knowing her. Cordelia's face is filled with panic, realising the extent of the situation. ,,Wilhemina, we need to call the doctor straight away'' she announces, knowing that Billie wasn't going to be able to think straight at the moment. ,,On it'' the woman with red hair announces before she leaves the room, an unfamiliar sound echoing through the room.

,,It's going to be okay sweetheart'' Cordelia whispers, her own tears streaming down her features, shocked and in disbelief this happened but still hoping they can fix this, that maybe they had made a simple mistakes with your scans, that maybe she could even fix it with her magic. The redhead woman quickly returns, telling them how the doctor was on the way and seeing their faces and feeling utter confusion, you can't help but ask. ,,Who- who are you?'' you whisper, glancing between the three of them and your words hit them like a tidal wave, as you watch their reaction. The crying blonde one sobbing, squeezing your hand a little tighter, the other comforting blonde one furrowing her brows as her eyes search yours, the redhead one's heart literally breaking in front of you, despite her features seeming angry.

,,Darling, this is Billie, that's Wilhemina and I'm Cordelia'' she explains, as she glances between them. ,,Your name is Y/N'' she explains, her heart heavy with pain and worry. ,,You had an accident and I assume you are suffering from amnesia but one of the best doctors we know is on the way and we will fix this'' she explains, bringing at least some light into the darkness in your brain as you repeat their and your own name in your mind, wanting to remember that much. However your eyebrows furrow with confusion again when they still didn't answer who they are to you. ,,But who are you?'' you ask again, knowing this was causing them pain but needing to understand. The three women simply look at each other, unsure how to explain this to you especially considering the circumstances and so noticing her girlfriends reactions, Cordelia speaks again, her usually the one taking over in tough situations.

,,We are your partners Y/N, your girlfriends'' she speaks, her eyes almost pleading with you to remember. ,,What all three?'' you blurt out, causing Billie to chuckle a little, despite the pain. ,,Yes sweetie'' Cordelia nods, before a little smirk creeps its way onto your features ,,Well I certainly must have a type huh?'' you question more to yourself than them really, causing Wilhemina to chuckle lowly. ,,Well at least you still have your sense of humour little one'' she chuckles, hoping to bring some light into the situation, Cordelia and Billie smiling warmly, despite their hearts heavy with pain and faces filled with concern.

The next while is certainly uncomfortable, the four of you sitting in silence before Wilhemina guides the doctor into the room, thanking her for coming over so quickly. Unbeknownst to you, the woman was Billie's close friends, one of her celebrity acquaintances, who eventually also became Wilhemina's doctor. She was familiar with the academy and witchcraft and so it seemed more fitting. Cordelia had showed her the scans and reports from the hospital before, doing it in a private matter because she didn't want to overwhelm you. You had slipped into a little daze of sleep, before Billie wakes you gently, as she hadn't left your side for one minute. ,,Darling, this is the doctor we mentioned'' she speaks and you watch as a brunette woman looks at you, a little torch in her hand. ,,Hi Y/N, do you mind if I take a quick look?'' she speaks and you simply nod, still feeling sleepy and exhausted. The torch blinds you a little and causes for your eyes to close ,,Sweetie I need you to keep your eyes open'' Cordelia ushers softly and you comply, letting the doctor finish her tests.

,,Do you feel any discomfort, pain or nausea?'' she asks and you glance between the four of them before nodding reluctantly, suddenly feeling overwhelmed with this as everything hurt and everything feels empty and confusing. ,,My head hurts'' you admit, causing for Cordelia to frown, Wilhemina's features stern as she observes, the worry almost drowning her in its intensity. And for some reason, your eyes search for the redhead who is standing opposite the bed, further away than all the others and for some reason you want to be closer to her as she seemed safe. You watch as all women leave towards the door, the doctor telling them how this wasn't uncommon given the circumstances, how she ushers something to Cordelia and wanting them to keep her in the loop, wanting to examine you closely over the next few weeks, wanting to get to the bottom of this.

By the time the three of them return, you are curled up in a ball, facing away from them, as tears prickle at your tired eyes, the confusion and pain causing you to feel a little overwhelmed, not understanding what was going on. You could feel all of these feelings, these things that you didn't understand. Cordelia's frame blurs into your vision as she kneels beside you, Billie and Wilhemina standing behind her. ,,Are you okay sweetheart?'' she asks, noticing your scared and sad expression. You don't say anything, simply blinking and letting the tears run before her hand wipes them gently, causing you to cringe at her touch, feeling overwhelmed by their presences as of right now. Cordelia senses it, her heart heavy with pain before she retracts her hand, sighing in the process ,,Would you like some space to rest?'' she speaks carefully, choosing her words in a certain way, to not overwhelm you further.

,,Yes please'' you speak quietly, causing for the blonde to nod and force a comforting smile before they leave, leaving you behind to sob into your pillow for a while before sleep washes over your tired body. They opt for Wilhemina's office in the end, as it was located right next to the bedroom, wanting to at least be a little close to you incase you needed them. Cordelia sighs, rubbing her temples in frustration before taking a seat on a nearby sofa, Billie standing nearby her arms crossed in front of her chest, her thoughts racing. Slowly, Wilhemina takes a seat in her armchair near her two girlfriends, her movements slow, matching both the physical and emotional pain the last few hours had left on her. ,,What are we going to do?'' Billie sighs, unsure what to do with herself as she begins pacing a little. ,,I think we need to be patient and give her some time'' Cordelia speaks, the doubt written on her features. ,,Like the doctor said, this can happen'' she repeats her earlier words.

,,Have either of you thought about what to do if she doesn't remember?'' Wilhemina questions, her voice and features stern as two blonde heads snap towards her. ,,She will'' Cordelia almost spits, the thought too painful for her to think it through. ,,But what if she never remembers us?'' Billie speaks, her eyes brimming with tears again. ,,We will make her remember honey, it will be alright'' Cordelia tries, walking over to Billie to wrap her in a comforting hug before glancing at Wilhemina, almost scolding her for freaking Billie out like this, despite knowing her concerns are valid and the supreme would be lying as the thought had also crossed her mind but she had pushed it down for now. ,,What are we going to do now?'' Billie asks, the other two knowing what she means as it was clear you needed some space.

,,We will go and have dinner with the girls, then we can check on her and see what to do'' Cordelia speaks softly and Billie nods, feeling safe at Cordelia's words. It takes a bit of convincing for Wilhemina to join them as she didn't feel like joining the girls, wanting to be close to you, look after you but knowing it may only make things worse as of right now. And dinner isn't exactly pleasant as your absence is noticed, Zoe and the older girls had asked and Cordelia wasn't really sure whether to fill them in, opting for now it was too soon and simply explaining that you had fallen ill and would need some rest for a few days. As Billie and Cordelia take care of the dishes and confiding in Zoe with what had happened as they needed to rely on her for a while at looking after the academy and girls, Wilhemina had opted to take some dinner and tea up to your room, carrying it in on a little tray.

As she enters the room quietly, assuming you are still asleep and struggling with both the tray and her cane a little, she is surprised to find you awake and looking at her. She smiles softly before placing the tray on the little table beside you, before clearing her throat. ,,How is the pain?'' she asks almost quietly, not wanting to cause more aching for you. ,,It's a little better'' you tell her, before she hands you some water and tablets. ,,These are painkillers from the doctor'' she explains as she watches you glance at them reluctantly but without thinking about it, you take them and she notices how you don't struggle in the slightest, her little one usually hating tablets and to take any form of medication. ,,You should eat something'' she ushers, softly handing you the tray with her shaky hands. ,,Thank you'' you whisper and smile softly at her, feeling a little less overwhelmed after some sleep.

She glances at you for a moment, before turning on her heels, thinking you still wanted some space. ,,Wilhemina?'' you ask, remembering her name from when Cordelia had told you before. ,,Yes little one?'' she asks, quickly internally scolding herself for the pet name. ,,Would you-'' you begin but stop yourself, unsure whether you could ask this of the woman. ,,What is it?'' she asks softly, taking some steps towards you again. ,,Would you mind staying with me?'' you almost whisper, before her eyes glisten a little ,,Of course Y/N'' she smiles softly, extracting a chair and sitting beside you. The room fills with silence for a while, as you eat some of the food that she had brought, also appreciating the warm tea as you felt a little cold. ,,Can you maybe tell me something?'' you ask almost reluctantly again and her head tilts a little at your request. ,,Of course, what would you like to know?'' she asks, unsure what exactly you mean.

,,Just anything?'' you ask and she feels bad then, not able to imagine what it must be like to forget, to not know anything. And so gently she fills you in about as much details as she knows about you, your age, where you are from, your favourite colour, your friends, the things you are passionate about. And you can't help but notice with how much softness and adoration she tells you those things, how kind you are, how nothing is ever too much for you as you loved helping out. She briefly mentioned you teaching at the academy and by now you assume that the place you are currently in must be said academy. ,,What academy is this?'' you ask a little confused after a while and for the first time, she halts, not instantly answering your question. ,,I- I think it's better if Cordelia explains that to you little one'' she tries and you simply leave it as that.

,,What time is it?'' you ask after a while, noticing how the room was much darker now, the sun having set a while ago. ,,It's 9pm darling'' she explains after glancing at her watch. ,,And so this is your bedroom?'' you ask after glancing around the unfamiliar room, seeing four dressers, what you assume to be on ensuite bathroom, and a large makeup table in the corner. ,,It's ours'' she explains a little hesitantly. And she can tell that this must be strange and uncomfortable ,,Do you feel like me showing you around a little?'' she asks, hoping that maybe the memories of this place would help you remember a little. ,,Yes please'' you reply, handing her back the tray she had given you, before you stand up, feeling slightly dizzy from the sudden movement but much better as the tablets are already showing their effects.

And so she takes you around the academy, first taking you to your old bedroom, now mostly empty explaining how you had lived there first before moving in with them, showing you both her and Cordelia's office, before taking you downstairs, leading you to the dining and living room, hoping that might spark something, considering the many nights you had spent together there. But by your reaction she can tell that nothing seems to ring a bell. And so at last she leads you to the kitchen where the other two blondes are still sitting and talking. As they notice you up on your feet they smile softly ,,Hey there'' Cordelia greets you warmly, taking in your features. ,,I have been showing her around'' Wilhemina announces to the other two ,,Perhaps you could show her the greenhouse Cordelia and tell her a little more about this academy'' Wilhemina ushers, her eyes speaking silently, Cordelia of course understanding what the redhead was implying. ,,Of course'' she smiles softly, before standing up. ,,Would you like to follow me outside?'' she asks you, and you nod, leaving the other two behind.

Shivering a little you take a look at the gardens, feeling the cold night air prickle at your skin a little. ,,This is the greenhouse'' she explains as the two of you enter. You glance around a little taken back and she recognises that face, sending her into a painful deja vu of when you first joined the academy and how your eyes sparkled that same way. ,,Would you like to take a seat?'' she offers, and you nod before the two of you sit in the quiet greenhouse. You glance at the blonde, for the first time really taking in her features and noticing how utterly beautiful she truly was. ,,About this academy'' she begins and you notice that same look of hesitation on her face that Wilhemina showed before. ,,This is Miss Robichaux's Academy'' she starts ,,For witches'' she carries on, startling you as your eyes widen. ,,This is a coven darling, the girls here are witches'' Cordelia explains gently, knowing this must be a lot to take in. She senses your disbelief and shock, before she places a hand on your shoulder.

,,I know this is a lot to take in'' she emphatically remarks before you look at her ,,Is this a joke?'' you ask, still in disbelief, despite having noticed some of the symbols on the tables as you entered and the countless books on potions and spells. ,,No darling'' she speaks softly again before her eyes lock with yours, trying to think of a way to prove to you that she was being genuine. ,,May I show you?'' she asks before you nod reluctantly. She walks over to one of the tables, extracting some rose petals from an earlier class, before closing her eyes and a beautiful white rose appears in front of your eyes. You gasp, your eyes flickering from the rose in her hand to her brown eyes. And then she watches the panic form across your features, as it all becomes a little overwhelming again, your head suddenly pounding again, ears ringing a little and chest rising and falling fast.

,,Okay darling, how about we get you back upstairs?'' she offers, noticing your trembling hands, before taking one into her hand and softly guiding you back inside. Once inside you find Wilhemina and Billie in the kitchen, their faces etched with concern as they notice your trembling state, already assuming the news would be a lot to take in. ,,How about we get you upstairs to bed?'' Cordelia offers but you pause, glancing between the three of them. ,,I- I don't'' you stumble over your words, feeling that same overwhelming feeling of emptiness again despite them having filled you in on more details. But it all feels too much, the thought of having to stay with them overwhelming despite the connection you feel towards them and knowing by now that they are your partners. ,,Y/N are you okay?' Billie asks, watching you seemingly struggle. ,,Can I stay in my old room?'' you blurt out, glancing at Wilhemina ,,The one you showed me?'' you ask.

Silence falls over the kitchen, Wilhemina and Billie glancing at Cordelia who stands frozen beside you, shocked at your request and utterly sad as you had always loved being close to them, always afraid of sleeping on your own. ,,I- the doctor recommended you to be under observation darling'' Billie tries, hating the idea of you being alone with all of this. ,,If that's what you want then of course, but promise to find us if you need anything?'' Cordelia offers, the other two shocked by her statement. ,,Thank you'' you breathe out almost in relief before looking at them one more time and leaving upstairs, struggling at first but eventually finding the room that Wilhemina had showed you before. ,,Why would you do that?'' Billie asks, her voice trembling before the supreme sighs ,,We need to give her time'' she announces before sighing. And so the three of them retract to their bedroom, without you, Cordelia checking on you once more and leaving some more water, pyjamas and painkiller with you, asking whether you needed anything but you politely declining. And so as the night slowly begins, neither of them manage to find much sleep, the bed feeling lonely and strange without you, feeling the urge to hold you close, the events replaying on their minds over and over again.

The next couple of days carry on like they had, you mostly spent your time on your own, the day after the accident, Cordelia had taken you to an appointment with the doctors, getting some more scans and checks done and she had worried since as you really didn't talk all that much with them, withdrawing almost. And you had felt bad ever since, the three of them really trying and showing you so much kindness. Cordelia had tried to convince you to sit in some of her classes, Wilhemina often checking on you throughout the day and Billie having left some photo albums with you. But you didn't feel ready, the headaches still returning as well as dreams at night, making it a little hard at times. A lot of questions had circled your mind and so the only thing you can do is toss and turn in bed for a while before eventually growing sick of it and sitting by the little fireplace in your room. As you glance around, you find a desk, your curiosity getting ahold of you before you open some draws, finding some books and when you read the title, the same question repeats in your mind, the question that lingered since Cordelia had filled you in on what this academy truly was.

You knew as much that this was your old room, your eyebrows furrow trying to think about whether they had mentioned anyone else staying there since. As you open the books, you find several pages on spell casting and potions and see several handwritten notes. Your eyes search the drawers until you find a pen, before it flies over a page, wanting to check whether this was your handwriting and whether you may also be a witch. The realisation ripples through you, your head hurting in that same way again as the handwriting is identical and then it dawns on you that you must also be a witch. The whole thing makes you feel sick, the lingering emptiness and confusion drowning you. You debate sleeping again but you knew it wouldn't come and so you opt for some water, the headache pounding into your skull. As you walk downstairs, you pass some witches and notice how they all smile at you, assuming they must have been your friends before. You take in the peace and quiet, hoping that you wouldn't find anyone downstairs, not necessarily in the mood after the realisation you had made.

Almost in a hurry, you rush to the kitchen, before you notice the three women that seem so familiar yet so unfamiliar at the same time. And you opt for leaving again before they notice your presence ,,Hi sweetheart'' Cordelia greets you with a warm smile, the other twos features equally filled with pain and longing. ,,Are you hungry honey? we kept you some dinner?'' Billie tries and you close your eyes for a moment to compose yourself. ,,No thank you'' you speak before explaining ,,I just came to get some water'' you explain, before Cordelia is quick to fetch a glass for you, before walking over and handing it to you. ,,Here you go love'' she speaks with so much love that it almost makes you feel bad for how angry and upset you are feeling at the moment. ,,Are you feeling okay? you look a little pale'' Billie Dean states, her features etched with concern.

You sigh then, trying hard to keep your emotions at bay before taking a sip from the water. ,,Sweeth-'' one of them speaks again and it bursts out of you, all the frustration, emptiness and their attempts of making you remember of making this better. ,,Can you stop'' you sigh, rubbing your head in frustration as it continues pounding. ,,Stop it with the constant petnames'' you sigh stomping your foot, their faces etched with worry and guilt. ,,And when were you going to tell me I'm a witch?'' you carry on, Wilhemina swallowing hard before glancing at the other two blondes. ,,How do you know that bab- Y/N?'' Billie asks, a glimmer of hope in her eyes. ,,I found a book in my room'' you announce, your voice matching your frustration. ,,I meant to tell you but I didn't want to overwhelm you'' Cordelia apologetically announces, her eyes filled with sadness. The room fills with silence before they notice a shift in your demeanour, your face considerably more pale, hands shaking as you hold onto the glass of water for support. ,,Are you okay Y/N?'' Cordelia tries again before taking a step towards you. ,,Please just leave me alone'' you almost shout in frustration as tears linger in your eyes ,,Y/N'' Wilhemina scolds, her cane banging on the floor once, causing for the pounding of your head to get even worse.

Without a word, you turn around, trying to ignore the stars forming in your vision and how much pain you are in. But then it all starts spinning a little too fast and you stop yourself, holding onto a nearby wall, Billie and Wilhemina standing frozen in their spot after your outburst before Cordelia rushes towards you, holding you up as your legs feel like giving in a little. ,,I don't - I'm sorry'' you whisper, closing your eyes bracing yourself for the pain. ,,I don't feel well'' you manage to somehow mutter before the blonde reaches for the glass, giving it to Billie who is now standing behind you. ,,May I take you upstairs Y/N?'' Cordelia tries, before you mutter out some sort of reply, unable to speak at this point. With a swift motion, both women are on either of your side, helping you up the stairs, Wilhemina following behind as they take you into your room, softly laying you down on your bed as hot tears stream down your cheeks. The redhead watches in pain, her heart aching seeing you in this much despair, Billie nervously pacing around a little, Cordelia taking in your features. Her hand lingers softly over your forehead, easing the pain that was so obviously written across your features and softly aiding you to sleep.

,,What is wrong with her?'' Billie asks nervously, before Cordelia turns to her. ,,I assume it's the headaches, the doctors mentioned that would happen''. And then the three of them stand there, almost a little awkwardly, feeling the urge to stay with you but knowing you wouldn't like it, given your withdrawal from them. And so they leave one by one, Wilhemina staying for a little while longer, watching protectively over your sleeping form but eventually joining her lovers a few doors away. Beside you, neither of them manage to get much sleep, Billie still crushed by the guilt of the whole thing, Cordelia's thoughts circling around what she could do to fix this, Wilhemina contemplating the outcome of you never remembering. And as the next morning arrives, they are the first downstairs, despite the weekend and opportunity to sleep in but they couldn't, not without their sunshine by their side who made weekend mornings so much brighter.

When you wake not much later, you feel almost relief as the pounding headache had stopped, as this was the first morning where you didn't wake after some very confusing dreams. The night prior lingers on your mind and you can't help but feel guilty, guilty for the way you had been treating them, withdrawing from them as they had showed you nothing but kindness. And as you change your clothes, getting ready for the morning ahead, you decide to do a little better today, wanting to try for them. When you eventually make it downstairs, the three of them are sitting by the kitchen table, Wilhemina reading the newspapers, Cordelia getting ready for something and Billie smoking a cigarette. ,,Good Morning'' your voice rings through the quiet kitchen, startling all three of them in the process as Billie almost drops her cigarette, Wilhemina lowering the newspaper. ,,Good morning Y/N, how are you feeling?'' Cordelia asks carefully, noticing how your features look much brighter and better, almost as if nothing ever happened. ,,Better, thank you'' you announce before taking a step towards them. ,,I'm sorry about last night'' you mumble, barely audible but they still pick it up. ,,I'm sorry about everything'' you apologise, their features softening.

,,You don't need to be sorry, we understand this must be a lot'' Cordelia softly reassures, offering you a seat and you hesitantly take it. ,,Are you hungry?'' Billie asks, smiling at you. You glance between the three of them before nodding ,,What would you like?'' she asks, happy to finally see you eating. ,,I- I'' you pause for a moment, unsure what you actually like. ,,I'm not sure'' you explain ,,What do I like?'' you ask and they glance between each other before Cordelia smiles ,,Let me make you your favourite Y/N'' and within minutes, you find a plate with eggs, some pancakes and orange juice in front of you. ,,Thank you'' you smile warmly at her before beginning to eat, your mouth watering as soon as you take some bites. ,,So what are you three doing today?'' you ask, causing Wilhemina's eyebrow to raise, surprised at your sudden change and as Billie and Cordelia begin speaking, it almost feels as it had before. ,,And I need to go to the markets today'' Cordelia announces before you look up at her ,,May I come with you?'' you ask, completely taking her by surprise.

The blonde looks at Billie and Mina who are equally surprised, Billie's heart swelling a little and the smallest smirk playing on the redheads lips. ,,Of course Y/N, I'd be delighted'' she announces. And so, Cordelia takes you to the markets, the car ride this time filled with conversation as you ask her all sorts of questions about witches and how you became one, asking about the things you used to be able to do and her filling you in with as much detail as possible. And it feels good, being in her embrace, her warm features, how she takes you around the markets, showing you her favourite stalls, taking you to a candle one and showing you her favourite scents, taking you food shopping and getting some ingredients to make your favourite things. And as Cordelia makes one last stop, you waiting in the car, you can't help but enjoy her presence, liking how warm she was, how ethereal beautiful both inside and out and as you return, you can't help but feel a little flutter in your heart. ,,How was it?'' Billie asks, the two of them still in the kitchen as you both return.

,,It was really nice'' you announce as you help the supreme empty the bags, despite her saying you should rest but you felt good and so you didn't want to rest. After unpacking most things, you find a bag with medication, assuming she picked those up on her last stop and instinctively you place them in front of Wilhemina. ,,Mina your medicine'' you speak, without thinking about it further. However, when you see her shocked expression, the other two equally startled, confusion washes over you again. ,,Y/N?'' Cordelia asks ,,How did you know that?'' her eyebrows are furrowed, Wilhemina's features very serious as you hadn't called her Mina since the accident. Billie looks at you with so much anticipation that you feel bad ,,I'm not sure'' you admit, scared to disappoint them again. ,,I'm sorry'' you mumble, feeling some tears brim in your eyes. ,,Hey, it's okay'' Cordelia reassures, her hand reaching for yours instinctively. And this time, you let her take it, holding onto her as she seemed safe for now.

The same pain in your head quickly takes over again, causing for you to take a step back, realising that maybe it was best to get some rest like Cordelia had initially suggested. ,,I'm.. going to rest for a bit if that's okay'' you speak softly, only met with understanding from your girlfriends, their gazes reassuring with a hint of concern. And as you return to your bedroom, you quickly fall asleep after taking a painkiller, unbeknownst that your memories must be connected to the random pains you would get throughout the days. They let you rest for the remainder of the day, Wilhemina bringing you some dinner in the evening and putting it on your bedside table as you are still asleep. The next day you had agreed to sit in on one of Cordelia's classes and so after breakfast with Mina and Billie, you make your way to the greenhouse, a lot of other witches already sitting and waiting for the potion class to begin. You listen intensively to the supreme, talking about the different herbs and ingredients, having somewhat of a hard time concentrating as again her beauty absolutely took you back. She looked stunning today, one of her black dresses, and you couldn't help but smile, despite it being ever so small, again you could feel the butterflies in your stomach, her voice so soft, her eyes burning with desire for her teaching.

As she begins to explain the last step for the potion, you can't help but feel your eyebrows furrowing before you begin speaking ,,Delia- isn't it supposed to be this one?'' you question, pointing towards one of the other vials and this time the whole class turns around. They had known by now what had happened and seeing your girlfriends shocked expression, you could tell you must have just said something incredibly stupid. ,,Class is dismissed for now'' Cordelia's voice rings through the air. They leave, Zoe exchanging knowing glances and you sit there, awaiting your fate and being told off. ,,How did you know that sweetie?'' she asks as she approaches you and then it kinda dawns on you that you had been remembering, despite it being ever so slowly. The blonde notices your hesitation, before taking another step towards you ,,This is good Y/N, you are remembering'' she smiles, her eyes brimming with tears but the happy feeling is quickly replaced by the returning pounding headache. And instead of sharing with her or them what was bothering you, the pain that had been lingering, you again retreat to your own bedroom, wanting some peace and quiet, away from everyone.

The next time you wake up, you had again slept through dinner and most of the day, again finding a tray on your beside, knowing it was from Billie this time as she always put some extra snacks on your tray for you. Curiously, you make your way downstairs, feeling a strange longing to the three women that apparently are your everything. You felt the urge to sit beside them, be in their presence. And you sigh in relief, seeing them sit in front of the tv, Wilhemina in her armchair doing some knitting, Cordelia on the sofa, chatting to Billie who is sitting on another armchair, as the two of them talk about something. You linger by the doorway for a minute, taking in the scene in front of you and strangely feeling like an intruder, as if you didn't belong. But your heart told you otherwise and so you clear your throat gently, startling the three of them and causing their heads to snap towards you. ,,Hi'' you awkwardly say, glancing around the room ,,Sweet- Y/N are you okay?'' Cordelia asks, their faces etched with concern. ,,Yes- um- may I sit with you?'' you ask, the two blondes face beaming with excitement, a small smile tugged on Wilhemina's lips. Instinctively, you opt for the space next to Cordelia besides your redhead girlfriend and again it doesn't go by unnoticed as that was where you usually sat, including in that same way.

This time they don't say anything, having noticed how their pointing out seems to only overwhelm you further. Yet they exchange knowing glances. Billie notices how you seem quite taken back and interested in what's on tv and it doesn't cross her mind until then that her show was playing in the background. She sees your features focusing on the scenes, Billie not in any of the scenes as of right now ,,Is this your show?'' you ask as you glance at her and again the three of them are taken back by how you would know that, unsure whether either of them may have managed it in the past. ,,Yes darling'' Billie announces. A little while later, the image is almost as it had been before, Billie now snuggled up on the sofa besides Cordelia, you also in the blondes arms slightly as she opted for putting an arm around you and you not refusing. Wilhemina sitting beside you three and watching with pride and the image gives her hope. She had struggled with the idea of you not remembering lately but seeing your milestones makes her unbelievably proud. As you continue watching her show, you suddenly feel an unsettling feeling in your stomach, the feeling of doom, that something was coming, something was severely off.

And then as if by some miracle, your mind is flooded with images, voices, scenes that you can't pinpoint. Your eyes widen as you vividly remember floating in the air, the screams of someone calling for help, confusing pictures of Cordelia's hands filled with blood, your blood. Suddenly your whole body shakes in the blondes arms, startling the three of them. ,,Y/N- are you okay?'' the redhead asks, noticing your shocked and yet unreadable expression. Cordelia's hand reaches for yours, trying to offer you reassurance but you freeze for a moment, unable to process everything your brain was currently throwing at you. ,,Sorry I- I'm tired'' you speak quickly before heading upstairs, leaving behind your three concerned girlfriends. ,,Do you think it was the show that triggered her?'' Billie sighs, walking over to her bag to sneak away for the comfort of a cigarette. ,,I'm not sure'' Cordelia speaks, her face filled with hesitation and concern, unsure why you had been reacting the way you did. Eventually, they opt for bed, choosing to give you some space, thinking that was what you would prefer, but despite that, neither of them could find much sleep, the concern and grief about you losing your memories and them losing their little sunshine, lingering on their minds.

If they had checked on you, they would have found you pacing through your old bedroom, occasionally curling into a ball on your bed, before pacing again as it seems that all your memories are returning. It was painful and slow, the first memories returning from the accident and the hospital, those ones particularly triggering. After followed all the good ones, each one from your girlfriends, before some more painful ones followed. And it hurt, your body on fire, as well as your mind, the throbbing in your head almost knocking the breath from your lungs. It felt like you were going through some weird magic ritual, wondering for a second whether Cordelia may have done something but knowing your Delia would never do this without your consent. And then at last, after several hours it finally stops, your ears ringing a little as the pain lingers but having sufficiently decreased. And then your eyes widen again, suddenly remembering it all, your heart weighing heavy with the guilt, not remotely able to understand how horrible these few weeks must have been with you like this. And then it dawns on you how much had been withdrawing, almost in disbelief to be in your old bedroom.

And then with steps as quick as light, you burst through your door, quickly making your way towards your real bedroom, hesitating for a moment but then the longing wins. Opening the door, not caring you find the three of them in bed, Wilhemina and Cordelia instantly jolt up, seeing your slightly panicked expression, Billie slowly turning around, a little confused. ,,Mina'' you whisper as you take in her appearance, as if you had just woken up, as if you are seeing her again for the first time in weeks. ,,Mina'' you cry her name out now, tears streaming down your cheeks. Cordelia's worried brown eyes meet her redhead lover's. And Wilhemina is quick to aid to your side, balancing on her cane before standing in front of you, her hand softly wiping your tears ,,What is it little one?'' she asks, her features soft but filled with concern. ,,I- I remember'' you stutter, and as you look up at her, her own tears greet you. She doesn't say anything, simply pulling you forward and into her arms, your head leaning against her chest, before Cordelia kneels in front of you, causing you to leave Wilhemina's arms for a moment. ,,Sweetie?'' she asks carefully, as if to make sure it really was you. ,,Delia-'' you cry out, your faces equally crumbling in front of each other. ,,My god- I'm so sorry'' you cry out, but Cordelia is quick to take you into her arms, tears of relief, rolling down her cheeks.

,,What is it?'' Billie's voice rings through the air but as she meets Wilhemina's expression, she instantly knows. ,,Oh- babydoll'' Billie whispers, quickly on her feet to equally take you into her arms. And in the end, the four of you are sitting on your bed, finally having you back where you belong. And for hours, you seem to apologise, for withdrawing, for not remembering sooner, for staying in your old bedroom. But they are quick to shush each of those thoughts, making you understand that this wasn't your fault and that they feel like they owe you an apology. ,,I'm so sorry this happened to you babydoll'' Billie apologises and by the way her voice shakes, you can tell she was blaming herself still. ,,This wasn't your fault Billie'' you reassure, before you ask Cordelia how they dealt with those spirits in the end and her filling you in. And then a silence follows, a comfortable one, finally being with your lovers again, finally remembering just why you loved each of them so much. For a while, you spent some time on Billie's lap, her telling you over and over again how brave you had been, snuggling into you, before the blonde softly falls asleep, content with having her babydoll back. Next you find yourself in Delia's arms, the blonde listening contently how you ended up remembering, her face crumbling as you explained the depths of pain you had gone through. ,,You were so brave sweetheart'' she tells you over and over again, eventually kissing you good night, content to have her little sunshine back.

And at last, you find yourself in Wilhemina's arms, your head resting comfortably on her chest as you look up at her features. It was dark, the only light source the moon illuminating the coven slightly, it was quiet, Billie and Delia's snoring softly filling the room. And then Wilhemina breaks it, telling you how glad she was to have you remember, how sorry she was and how proud she was of you. Her words are quiet, delicate and so unlike her usual demeanour. You snuggle into her further, feeling safe with her arms wrapped around you. ,,The truth is little one- I could never do this without you'' she admits and when you meet her brown eyes, you tear up again, her words so raw, filled with honesty as she fights back her walls and usual sternness keeping her from revealing her feelings like that. And so, the two of you hold onto each other through the night, eventually sleep washing over you both. Wilhemina content with having her little one back. And so after a long journey, you finally are back where you belong, right there, right now, with them.

#cordelia goode #sarah paulson #wilhemina venable #ahs #american horror story #billie dean howard #sarah paulson x reader #asks #cordelia goode x reader #cordelia goode imagine #wilhemina venable x reader #billie dean howard x reader

[artfulacrostic]

memes for The Bad Batch, 2x03 "The Solitary Clone"

*SPOILERS*

#tcw #the bad batch #the bad batch spoilers #tbb s2 #star wars memes #star wars tbb #crosshair tbb #commander cody #cc 2224 #cc 9904 #the solitary clone #tbb 2x03 #HOW ABOUT THAT EPISODE FOLKS !!!! #when i tell you i almost had a heart attack like four times.... #also where tf is the base they're deploying from set?? #big statues with what looked at a glance like clone armor?? and that wall of something... #anyway maybe i'm just forgetting smth bc i'm so tired rn but if you happen to know #pls tell me lmao

[diejager]

how does a (monster AU) phoenix! reader sound? ...I kinda imagine 141 (except price) getting a heart attack when reader takes a bullet and bursts into flames and then a heap of ash, and then (im pulling a harry potter description of pheonix but its ur choice) the most ugly bird or something pokes their head out of the ashes and they're like '...oh'.

I remember watching Fawkes burning and turning to ash before he popped his head out. So adorable.

Ashes Cw: burning, death, rebirth, tell me if I missed any.

Ghost knew when someone was lying, able to sniff out a liar within a mile. Your dimmer smile, shorter laughter and exhaiusted expression, nothing seemed to make your days better than a warm bump of tea once or twice a day to sooth the ache in your bones and the strain in your muscles. He’d approach you with a clear mind, wanting to get to the bottom of your sickness, why you’d occasionally cough, voice weak and breathy until it cracked. You told him you were fine, that it was just the weather affecting you, but he’d seen this kind of sickness before, a cold that sunk into the bones and clogged every sinuses with intent —sick and vulnerable.

He wasn’t alone in this thought, Alejandro and Gaz shared similar doubts, coming forth to Price with their fears rather than sneaking around like he did, but Price had waved them off, telling them that it was a seasonal thing, you got sick from time to time and rose back from it as if death failed to catch you. This did not seem like something simple and mundane, Ghost could see death follow you like it followed him, it was ever present, so much so that Alejandro and Horangi - the two with the weakest nose out of the four - could smell it ooze off you like a dark miasma plaguing your body.

It seemed as if the both of you shared something that the others weren’t privy to, a low whisper in the dark that they failed to catch or the secret you shared through confidentiality higher than even a colonel. The captain knew you before you joined them, forming a tight connection through past trauma and fuck ups. Perhaps that’s why Price seemed almost chipper about your saddening state.

It seemed that Ghost was kept in as much darkness as the rest, the higher ups had kept it hidden from him, from König and from Alejandro who should’ve had the jurisdiction to have access to your documents. Especially after seeing you burst into flames after being shot in the neck by a surviving sniper (Ghost was quick to shoot him down), body gone in a coud of ash and dusted feathers. He panicked, but he wasn’t the only one to rush towards what remained of you. Despite their panicked mumbles and frantic thoughts, Price had reassured them that it was normal, that you were still alive —all they had to do was wait a few seconds for you to reappear.

Appear you did, a small, ashen head, beak the length of a child’s thumb, small ad brittle, big, rounded eyes blinked at them, narrowed in confusion until you called, a tiny croon from a chick’s throat. You shuffled your way through the mess, featherless wings flapping as you hopped towards Price, who quickly met you half way, picking you up with one nimble swoop.

“Look at you,” Price cooed, pressing his thumb to your forehead, feeling the soft, newly grown feathers that glowed white, “About time you burned, yeah?”

“Fuckin’ hell,” it was the only thing he could answer with when his mind was building up these theories, every little thought in his head went to understand what and how you were made. It was as close as Soap’s Steamin’ bloody Jesus or König’s dumbfounded Was.

“Is that why you told us not to worry, Captain?” Gaz’s ability to think clearly in adrenaline-inducing moments was a blessing, able to restrain his unending thoughts to connect two together and conjure up a sentence - a few words, a mumble or a plea - to understand whatever happened to you. “What happened?”

Price let out a deep rumble, a laugh from his belly, deep and amused, a striking contrast to their worried frowns. He handled you softly, petting and pinching at the young feathers growing on you while he turned you around, showing them how Price held you with such careful ease and soothing smile. Ghost doubted that Price didn’t have any prior experience in caring for you, seeing how loving he was with you —like a lover caring for his sickened, or a dragon guarding his treasure, Ghost wasn’t sure which one was right.

“Hunter’s a phoenix, “ he smiled softly, eyes gleaming with too much glee, a silent laugh at their sudden bewilderment, approaching you slowly to admire you themselves. “They burst to flames every three years or so, the last one was around five years ago- long overdue for a reset.”

Soap and Horangi were the first to attempt to touch you, the excited dog and the curious feline, tentatively poking at you with a finger until you pecked it, annoyed by their incessant jabbing. You let out a shrill cry from your throat, small and hilariously fierce for something so small and fragile. You crawled to the ends of Price’s fingers, wings flapping to urge them to pick you up instead of pointing a finger and cooing at you as if you were an exotic animal. You somewhat were —exotic, that is.

“A wee thang, aye, Cap?” Soap awed, cradling you in his palms, you weighted so little, as light as a feather on Gaz’s wing.

“Ugly as a rat too,” Horangi snickered, making light of the situation that had made their hearts stop.

You screeched, shaking your head wildly at him, his shoulders bobbing while you showed how offended you felt by acting out, an angry, little chick putting on a show of aggression and courage. His dark thoughts receded, Ghost’s fears and demons falling back into the depths of his mind when his eyes met your beady ones, round and doe-eyed, your age shining through the innocence of a newly-hatched. It made him wonder how you’d look once your feathers grew out, would you be as majestic as the stories portrayed phoenix did, with your great wings and great strength, feathers bathed in the sun’s warm embrace and tipped with the power of undying flames of power. Phoenixes were seen as symbols of immortality, resurrection —of life and death. Untouchable by death and favoured by life, you would live in a cycle of ashes and flames, embers cracking until it softened to flickers, a soft, gentle flame ready to yield to nature.

Taglist: @craxy-person @crowbird @dead-cipher @iwannabealocalcryptid @iizx7y @mxtokko @yeetusspagheetus @capricorn-anon @perfectus-in-morte @sae1kie @yeoldedumbslut @tallmanlover @distracteddragoness @vxnilla-hxrddrugs @konigsblog @havoc973 @angelcakes-22 @cassiecasluciluce @ramadiiiisme @ramblingsofachaoticthinker @ki-cant-spel @im-making-an-effort @love-dove-noora @jinxxangel13 @daisychainsinknots @0alk0msan @mul-pi @danielle143

#x reader #cod mw2 #cod mw2 x reader #monster 141 #monster 141 au #mw2 ghost #mw2 ghost x reader #simon ghost riley #simon ghost riley x reader #konig x reader #konig mw2 #captain john price #captain price x reader #gaz mw2 #gaz x reader #kyle gaz garrick #john soap mactavish #soap mw2 #soap x reader #kim horangi hong jin #horangi #horangi x reader #alejandro vargas x reader #alejandro x reader #alejandro vargas #rudy x reader #rudolfo parra

[lovebugism]

shy! reader & eddie -  “are you okay? is the heat getting to you?” 

💛💛💛💛💛💛💛

hi angel! thanks so much for your request!! — the one where you have a hard time telling eddie when you feel bad and he nurses you back to health (hurt/comfort, shy!reader, 1.5k)

bug's summer fic fest ♡

You felt a little like the sun was microwaving you.

The golden rays beat down on you most mercilessly, sucking all the energy from your body while simultaneously burning you alive. Once you sprawled out on the quilt Eddie brought for your little trip to Forest Hills Lake, you just laid there — too tired and too sick to do anything else.

The boy stood over you after noticing how uncharacteristically disinterested you were in feeding the ducks. His shadow shielded you from the sun as he poked your thigh with his foot. “Are you dead?” he joked with a lopsided grin you couldn’t see. Your eyes fluttered shut minutes ago, and you didn’t have the strength to open them again.

He knew something was off when you didn’t smile back. He knew something was really wrong when you muttered something vaguely in return that only came out in slurred mumbles. 

Eddie manages to get you up with little help from the you in question. 

Your suddenly exhausted frame leans heavily into his side as he leads you back to the trailer. Though the lake was quite literally in his backyard, the walk home took several minutes longer than usual. Your feet were made of brick and your swimming head had turned the world on its side. It took a world of strength to ascend the three steps of his rickety wooden porch. 

“Here, c’mon,” Eddie hums as he follows you through the squeaking screen door. He walks you the short distance to the couch, putting both hands on your waist to steady you when you start to sway. “Sit down before you give me a heart attack, alright?”

You listen to him, though you don’t exactly hear him. Through your pounding headache and the rushing ocean in your ears, he might as well be talking to you underwater.

“I don’t feel good…” you slur quietly, eyes squeezed shut as you descend slowly onto the couch cushion. Eddie holds onto your elbows as you sit, watching you with attentively wide button eyes.

“I know, doll,” he coos empathetically in return. “I’m gonna go get you some water, okay?”

Your clammy hands grasp his wrist when he lets you go, your grip weak with a barely-there touch. You peer up at him with glassy eyes that swim with unshed tears and leftover sunlight. 

“Don’t go,” you plead in a whisper. Your voice isn’t strong enough to be much louder.

You feel eerily close to passing out. Your head fills with static and you feel dreadfully far away from the world around you. Feeling this sick is scary in itself, but having Eddie so close makes you feel much safer in comparison.

“I’ll be right back. I promise,” he tells you with a soft, pink grin. He slides his palm out of your trembling grip to hold your hand. Your fingers are sweaty and uncharacteristically warm, almost burningly so. “You need some water in your system, babe. That’s probably why you feel so shitty right now.”

You’re too weak to protest any further.

The boy rushes into the kitchen. You vaguely hear his receding footsteps, glasses clattering together, and the hiss of the faucet — but it all sounds so far away. You’re just a countertop over from him, but it feels like lightyears.

Eddie stays gone for exactly four slow blinks. 

Time has become a big ball of nothingness in your nauseous state. It feels like he’s gone for a lifetime and zero seconds flat at the same time. Either way, you’re equally grateful when he returns to you.

“Here you go,” the boy lilts quietly when he’s back in the living room. He ushers the cup of water into your weak hands but keeps a hold of it for a moment or more, just to make sure you’ve got it. “Drink up, doll.”

Your face scrunches in disdain at the thought. You know you’re thirsty, but you feel so queasy that your mouth has started to water. 

“I’m scared I’m gonna puke,” you confess in a nearly inaudible slur. 

“You won’t. I promise,” Eddie assures with a quiet smile. His fingers smooth over your forehead to push away the sweaty tendrils sticking there. You’re hot to the touch — and not even in the way figurative way he always jokes about, like genuinely burning. He singsongs to quell heavy tension, “And even if you do, I’ll clean it up for you, okay?”

The thought of him washing up after you is as heartwarming as it is stomach-churning. 

You sip at the glass just to appease him. The water sloshes gently in the cup along with your trembling hand. It’s not cold, but it’s not warm either — it’s the perfect temperature for someone so fragile suffering from an acute bout of heatstroke. The liquid is soft in your mouth, piercing you somewhere in your soul and making you feel almost instantly better when you swallow it down.

“How’s that?” Eddie coos, still standing over you with a loving sort of concern.

You make an unintelligible noise into your water.

“Do you feel any better? Still feel faint?”

“I don’t know,” you mumble with a feeble shrug. Because you don’t. You still feel weak and burning, but less distant than you had just moments before. You’re not sure what that means, though. “Maybe a little…”

Eddie puts a hand to your forehead, at a loss of what else to do. You’re still hot to the touch, but certainly not as warm as you had been earlier. The whirring A.C. and tap water must be doing the trick, he figures. 

He spreads his palm along your clammy cheek. “You still feel a little sticky…” he tells you.

The words make you feel queasy. You blink up at him with a heavy, glassy gaze. “I feel gross…”

“You’re just sick, babe. It’s okay,” he assures you, laughing softly as he swipes his thumb over the apple of your cheek. His chocolate eyes sparkle when he looks down at you. “I’d hug you if I thought that wasn’t the worst idea in the world.”

The bridge of your nose scrunches at the thought. 

You need Eddie around, but the thought of him touching you any more than this makes you want to be sick. You’ll kiss him absolutely stupid the second you’ve cooled down, though. He won’t be able to peel you off of him, then.

You shake your head in response to his implication, slow and sloppy like a child.

Eddie chuckles. “Exactly. Keep drinking for me, ‘kay?”

He sits down next to you, careful not to jostle you too much. He leaves several inches of agonizing distance between you and finds keeping his hands to himself is a most incorrigible feat. He watches you take ginger sips from the cup and wants so desperately to hold you to his chest until you feel better again. 

He hopes that moment isn’t too far away now.

You feel considerably cooler once the water’s all gone. The leftover sunshine has nearly exited all your pores, allowing the air conditioner to formally pierce your skin. The tap water refreshes you from the inside out.

“Better?” Eddie ponders with raised brows.

You nod lazily.

He exhales in relief through his nose. “Good. You were starting to scare me for a second there.”

You flash him a sheepish glance. “Sorry…”

“It’s not your fault, doll. Don’t apologize,” the boy chuckles. Only you would apologize for feeling so sick — as though it wasn’t something as forced upon you as it was upon him. “I should’ve known better than to take you out today. It was way too hot outside.”

That’s not what he really wants to say. 

If he’d said exactly what he meant, it would’ve gone something like, “I should’ve known better than to take you out today because it was way too hot, and you never tell me when you’re feeling bad.” 

But that isn’t really your fault either. 

Eddie knows how you are. He should’ve checked in on your more. If he hadn’t gotten so distracted, he probably could’ve gotten you inside before the sun almost killed you.

“It’s not your fault, either, Eds,” you tell him rather pointedly, as though you could hear his thoughts.

“No,” Eddie concedes with a shake of his head. “It’s the stupid sun’s fault for making my girl feel so sick.”

And even though he wasn’t exactly trying to make a joke, you laugh at him anyway. It’s just a weak exhale through your nose, but Eddie beams when he sees you finally smiling. 

When his hands start to ache, he finally wonders, “Feel like being touched now?”

You don’t. Not really. Not in the way you’d like him to touch you, anyway. You’d love to be wrapped up in his arms and melt with him in totality, but your swimming head and warm skin disagree with you. 

You reach for the wrist in his lap and put his hand on your thigh — for the sake of feeling him, but not overwhelmingly so.  

It makes Eddie laugh. His palm smoothes over your knee before squeezing you there. “The water did the trick, huh?”

You nod. 

He beams. 

“I love being right,” he lilts, only halfway serious.

“I know you do,” you grumble in response. 

You love him and his smug grin far too much to be genuinely annoyed with him, though. The understanding of this unsaid fact makes his smile widen.

#published by bug #stranger things x reader #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson #stranger things #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson fic #eddie munson fanfiction #stranger things imagine #stranger things fanfic #stranger things fic #stranger things fanfiction #st drabbles #eddie spaghetti drabble #bug's summer fic fest!

[bubbles-for-all-of-us]

You don’t get to tell me about sad

Previous chapter / Next chapter

a/n part two! Thank you for everyone who read the first one. So glad some of you liked it so much. 🫧🤍

summary: Azriel gets an assignment he can’t seem to decline. Now he has a princess full of attitude under his protection. The only question is whose cold heart will break first.

warning: past trauma, scars

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

“No threats, nothing," Azriel dropped the report down on the table. Rhys had been the one to go meet with Autumn’s high lord. Bringing back the reports of everything that had been happening the past three days. “Eris said that everyone still thinks she’s there," Rhys stated. They planned on spinning a lie about you visiting an old relative, but it was better if the people who had inflicted the first attack would be misled about your true location.

“This could have been a one-time thing," Cassian hums, flipping through the report himself. “Or someone is waiting for the right moment," Rhys links his fingers together, resting his chin on them. “Why her?”, Cassian frowns. Yeah, Azriel asked that too at first. You didn’t seem to be magically gifted. There was nothing special about you, as far as he was aware. “Eris said she’s a weak link," the spymaster muttered.

“They’re close? That would explain things," and Cassian was right there. Love might be the worst weapon to have. Once, it slipped into the wrong hands. Azriel let out a sigh.

“Considering how he delivered the news, he loves her a lot. I believe, besides Lucien, she’s the closest to him." If he was being truthful, he hadn’t given it much thought. Here in Velaris, he could leave you on your own devices for the most part, at least. He didn’t need to trail after you. There was no need. Azriel had eyes almost everywhere.

“We’ll figure something out. I will ask around to see if something is stirring." Rhys leans back, his eyes now fixed on Azriel, “How are you?”. Azriel tries to hold back to not roll his eyes. “I’ve been fine for two weeks ago." And he was. Yes, his left side still hurt. The scar was deep and rather long. Rapping around his ribcage. Not to mention that he had pulled the stitches out way too many times. “Don’t start this," Rhys says bluntly.

“I could be up at the camps doing what I do best," Azriel points out. Itching to pick this topic back up. “Dying in the snow?"—that was a straight blow from his brother. Rhys hadn’t been able to say it out loud for the first couple of weeks. The thought of Azriel dying had messed with his head. “I said no, so it’s a no. Plus, you have a new responsibility," Rhys states firmly, and Azriel knows that there is no use in nagging him any further. “Counting days till she’s out of my sight," he mutters beneath his breath, standing up to leave. He just forgot to mean the words he spoke.

Velaris was different from what you had imagined it to be. In a good way, but it still wasn’t home. The ever-green trees almost bugged you. It was all too alive. Too bright. You missed the deep oranges. The crunching of the leaves beneath your feet. Rhys tried to be a caring host by giving you an autumn-themed room, but that only left a bitter taste in your mouth. So even if you had been advised by their healer to keep all weight off your swollen ankle for a while, you still found yourself, pulling away the decorations and shoving away the autumn theme blankets, the little trinkets.

You tried to keep out of everyone’s hair. Choosing to take your food into your room. But the four walls were starting to drive you mad. You had tasted freedom, and you didn’t want to be back there. Locked up. Hidden. Forgotten. So when your eyes landed on the two males sparing in the front yard, you, of course, first observed them from your window. Watching through the curtains and then pushing back.

“You should be resting your leg," Azriel hadn’t even turned to face you when his voice found you. A slight smirk tugging at your lips. He had been avoiding you. Or maybe you were too full of yourself. Maybe he was just busy. There was no requirement for him to be at your side twenty-four-seven.

“You’re a shit bodyguard if you didn’t know that I've been doing just that for the past three days," you muse, stepping closer to the racks of weapons that line their training ground. Fingers l brushing over a set of onyx black daggers. “Madja said at least a couple of weeks," Azriel points out, reaching to rewrap his knuckles. “And I said that I'm bored, and now we are here," you purr, lifting one of the daggers, feeling out the weight as you twist your wrist. You could feel Azriel’s eyes. Watching you. Following your every move.

“Or you just wanted a closer look at this“, the male next to him, who you had come to learn was Cassian, smirks, gesturing to his bare chest. Abs glistening with sweat. Yeah, the view wasn’t bad. Autumn males, at least the ones you know, didn’t compare. “And I thought this one was full of himself." You hooked your thumb at Azriel, rolling your eyes.

He shakes his head, “Would it hurt you to say my name?”, "Yes, Mr. Tree, trunk up my ass." You give him the most obnoxious smile you could master. Earning a deep growl from the spymaster in return. Until your eyes landed on the wooden bow, neatly placed on the ground by the buckets of water. “I want to shoot arrows," you mutter, pointing to the weapon, making Azriel’s gaze follow suit.

He let out a small snort, “Have you ever held a bow in your delicate hands?”. That prick. You narrowed your eyes at him. "Oh, news flash, he is also a sexist,” you hiss. Rounding his side to reach for the arrows. “I just don’t want you falling and tripping once again, princess," he teases in an almost mocking tone. You step closer to him. You doubt that he finds you intimidating, considering that you need to look up to even meet his gaze. But your face stays ice cold as you point to the bow, “Give it to me." He doesn’t move at first. As if on purpose. Giving you extra time to look at him. His face. There is a light scar over his right eyebrow. It’s not all that visible. Unless you take your time to… but, your little daydream is cut short by a bow being shoved at your chest. You nearly lose your footing. And just like that, you are snapped out of your daze.

“Don’t start crying when you miss," Azriel says, too full of himself as always. Leaning on the side beam like a smug, fucking cat. Too bad you grew up among five arrogant males. Six if you include that sadist of a father. That’s enough for the amber to catch fire deep within your chest. You line the arrow up. Taking a deep breath. Eyes falling to the target at the edge of the field ahead. And then it’s muscle memory as you let it loose. The first one hit the bull's eye. A satisfied smile speeds on your face as you reach for the second and third. You’re petty like that. Not in the mood to give Azriel a chance to call it fool’s luck.

A loud chuckle fills your ears, and then someone is nudging your shoulder. “She handed you your ass on a silver plate, brother." Cassian’s laughter booms, and you can’t help but match his grin. “Choke on the dust," you muse, flipping him off as you twist away from him. But Azriel is quick as always, grasping your elbow as he spin you back. “Know your place," he says through gritted teeth. Nostrils flaring.

“Maybe you should show me my place," you mutter, crossing an x on his chest. You yank your hand from his grip, glancing at Cassian, “Put the dog on the leash." Azriel curses, making Cassian snort, before the general starts barking, moving to the side to tackle his brother. You shake your head, continuing to walk away. Only catching a faint warning from Azriel, “Don’t fucking encourage it.”

Azriel chose to leave you alone for the rest of the day. Yet he could deny it all he wanted, but the shots were clean. Not to mention that he was almost relieved that you had left your room. A burden or not, he didn’t want you just rotting between the four walls. So he’s not all that surprised when your figure steps out onto the balcony. A lantern in your hand. One that you carefully place on the ledge before placing your hand on the stones. Stepping on your tiptoes, leaning to look over the edge.

"Snooping", the sudden sound of his voice makes you jump, your elbow hitting the lantern and pushing it over the edge. “You’re insane. Absolute sociopath," you gasp, hand on your chest as you try to wipe the threat from your face.

“You’re pathetic if that made you scared," Azriel shrugs, stepping out for the shadows. It wasn’t pathetic. He knew that. If he didn’t want to be seen, no one would see him. So blaming this on you was lame, but he could excuse it. For now. “You’re a creep," you hiss, leaning over the edge to look for the broken glass, now scattered on the ground. “Who sits in the dark like that?”, you ask, shaking your head and pulling your ginger hair over to one side. Fidgeting with the ends. That’s a new habit, Azriel thinks to himself, one he hadn’t yet observed.

You just shake your head once you don’t receive an answer from him. Eyes darting up the sky. It’s almost pitch black. The last traces of orange and deep purple are coloring the very edges of the horizon. “The sky is beautiful here as well," you breathe out. Not sure why. It felt stupid to get sentimental with that crazy man behind you. “It is," Azriel admits, forcing his eyes from your frame to lift to the sky. But the stars only manage to hold his attention for so long. Before they glance right back down at you, Azriel can’t tell from your face, but he feels the wave of sadness crashing into his chest.

And not even a heartbeat later you speak up again. “I usually take walks with the dogs in the evening, so... old habits die hard. I feel the itch." It’s an almost bitter chuckle that slips past your lips as you speak. Azriel walks close to the railing. “I feel the same if I don’t get to work late at night," he’s not sure why he’s even saying that. Admitting something that you don’t need to know. Or probably care to know. Your nose screeches up. “That’s a weird thing to like," you mutter. Azriel rolls his eyes, “Stomping through the woods isn’t any better.”

The breeze picks up. Chasing the last bits of warmth away. Making you wrap your arms around yourself tighter, but you don’t step back. Don’t move to head inside. “So, you’re a working late and sleep-in type of guy," you mutter. Azriel realizes it then. You’re here because you don’t want to be alone. Force-pushing the conversation to keep someone else in your company. Flashes of the basement flicker through his mind.

“No, I wake up early," he answers, a heartbeat too late, and yet you’re still nodding along. “So, no sleep type of guy," you mutter beneath your breath. The darkness is now fully draping over you two. Hiding you both from the world. “And you’re a talk just to listen to yourself speak type of girl," Azriel points out, making you huff. “And here, I thought we were having a moment." He watches as you turn around, shaking your head. “Jumping to conclusions kind of girl too," he says firmly, and this time it’s enough to drag a little chuckle from your lips as your head falls back ever so slightly.

But the distant pain doesn’t leave your eyes when you glance back at him. “Did Eris say anything by any chance?”, you mutter. A part of Azriel considers lying. Twisting the truth. A white lie. But he can’t bring himself to. Too many people were already keeping you in the dark, so he mutters a quiet, "No." Watching as you nod way too eagerly at his answer, “Of course, delighted to get rid of the troublemaker," there was that pained smile at the end as you finally chose to spread the distance between you two. “Lucien is coming tomorrow, though," Azriel points out, your tense shoulders easing ever so slightly. You don’t say anything as you reach for the glass door.

“Are you going to sleep?”, Azriel asks, almost cringing himself out. What was this sound of desperation? He didn’t fucking care what you did. “Not yet. I will walk in the garden for a bit." You gesture to the fields wrapping around the house. Azriel nods firmly, “Keep to the upper parts; don’t go past the rose garden if you get by the white... ”, “Okay, okay, mother... Tie me to your chair and watch me wilt away while you’re at it," you huff, your lips thinning into a tight line. “I’ll finish some work and come to do a room sweep," the spymaster says in an almost demanding manner. You simply raise your hand to your forehead, saluting him with a quiet “Yes, sir," before disappearing into the house.

It took Azriel way longer to get through his usual routine. He liked his office tidy for his morning working session. So at night, even if he was tired to his bones, he made the effort to sort through every pile of documents. Arrange them neatly. When he finally made it up to the top floor, where your room was located, it was well past midnight. Azriel knew that he could just drop it. He didn’t have to show up and check the room. Yet he still stood there right by your door.

"Princess," he knocked gently, not really in the mood to startle you once again tonight. You might be small and fierce, but everyone has a limit. When no response follows, he tries again: "Yn, it’s Azriel, can I come in?”, but still nothing. He could just walk in, but you weren’t a prisoner per se. “This is your last warning," he says, waiting for a heartbeat before pushing onto the handle.

It was dead quiet in the room. He would have concluded that you might not have returned yet if not for the mess that your bed was. He frowns slightly. Following the line of blankets that lead to the fireplace. And here you are. Curled by the fire, all the blankets dragged from the bed. Piles of books scattered all around you. He didn’t know that you had gone to the library. Or maybe this was Nesta’s doing. In that case, he didn’t wish to find out what was written in them. Azriel scannes the room. His eyes fell on the pens and pencils on the table. A sketchbook. A strange feeling kindled in Azriel’s chest. He has a pad just like that. Kept it in his leathers. So if he feels the urge or if something captures his attention begging to be sketched, he could easily do so.

Azriel steps closer, trying not to leave evidence of looking through your stuff. It makes him uneasy just how close you are to the fireplace, but then. Flame calls to flame. He knows that he should turn away. Just leave you be. There’s no danger here. He knows it. But he finds himself stepping forward, kneeling by your body. He hasn’t seen you so peacefully innocent before. He only knew the frowning, tantrum-throwing princess.

Tilting his head to the side, he tries to drink your features in. You were a Vanserra. The resemblance to Eris and Lucien was there. But a much softer version. With freckles all over your face. Long eyelashes. Your hair was more ginger than fire-red. But then his gaze halted. Your left shoulder was bare. The very top of your breast... a scar. It was a scare that made him halt. On your collarbone. And then two lines going beneath your shirt. Azriel’s scowl only deepened at the sight of one more white line at the side of your throat. “What did they do to you?", he mutters quietly. But it’s enough to make your eyes snap open as you jolt up. And once again, there’s a dagger aimed at Azriel’s throat, this time from the side. The very tip pressing into his flesh.

“What the fuck?", you huff, lowering your hand. “That’s a much better aim. You’re learning fast, princess." Azriel tries to keep his face cool as he steps back. Standing tall. “Why are you here standing over me like that?”, you scowl, pulling the blanket tighter over your shoulders.

“I just came to check the room," Azriel says, moving his gaze to the window. Anything was better now than looking into your burning eyes. “And decided that you can just let yourself in," you say, pushing to stand up. “You were on the floor by the fire; who knows, maybe you were lying there dead?", Azriel bits back, gesturing at the mess you had created. It was embarrassing that he had seen it. No one was supposed to see it. A bitter laugh slips past your lips, “You wish that would be...", and in a blink of an eye, he is there. Inches away from you. Hand reaching for your hair. No doubt he had thought about just yanking it back but decided against it at the last minute.

“Don’t finish that," he says, opting for a warning finger once more. As if he’s scolding a child. “Or what?", you flash your teeth at him. Pretending to bite the very tip of his finger. “You love picking fights, huh?", he straightens, smothering his hair back. The slight curls falling over his forehead. “You love changing the subject, huh?”, you mock back in the same tone. “You might just be one of the most frustrating things that came out of autumn," and you can see that he probably didn’t even mean to say it out loud. But he did. And now you two were standing in the aftermath of it. Your hands curling into fists. “Thing...", you smile at him, “How sweet of you; ladies probably drop their pants for that," and here it was that cold, cold look on your face. "Out," you hiss, now pointing Azriel to the door. Dismissing him.

The next morning is rather awkward. Azriel finds you in the sunroom of the house. Your legs tugged beneath you. You don’t lift your head, and he says nothing. Taking his usual spot by the window to drink his coffee. It unsettles him. The silence. He doesn’t want you to feel like he’s some creepy stalker. Maybe you both should settle the ground rules. Talk about the situation. But once he finally finds the courage to open his mouth, the door opens. A gasp slips past your lips as you jump up, rushing to the male standing in the doorway.

"Luci," you breathe, wrapping your arms around your brother’s neck. The warmth he carried seeping into your body. “My little flicker," he mutters against your hair, leaving a couple of kisses on the side of your head. "Azriel," Lucien nods in acknowledgment. Azriel follows his movement. “I’ve got it from here”, Luci smiles at the spymaster, rubbing his hands up and down your back.

“What’s going on?”, you mutter against his chest, refusing to let go. “What did Eris say?”, your brother asks, and it’s enough to make you pull back. “I don’t give a fuck about what he said," you grunt. “I want to know what you know," you demand. You have a full right to. Lucien holds your gaze for a moment before letting out a tired sigh, “We will be heading back for a bit." You shake your head, turning away from him.

“I will tell you as soon as I can, I promise," he says as he steps forward, holding you by your shoulder as he lowers his forehead to lean against you.“Why are we going back?” It’s a whisper, but blood runs thicker than water. And you need to stick together, as you always did. Even if you still don’t understand anything, “There is a public outing. He needs us by his side." That makes you chuckle, “I also needed him by my side in case anyone was wondering.”.

"Yn," Lucien sighs, but you shake your head. “You don’t get to make me feel bad for him." It’s selfish, you know that. But they had sworn to protect you, and this feels like the opposite of it. “He’s figuring this out too; be kind," Lucien mumbles, pulling your hands into his and squeezing them. “Come on, you’ll get to watch the joy on Azriel’s face when I tell him that he’ll have to spend a couple of nights in autumn," he nudges you, making you smile ever so slightly, “Now that I can get behind”.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Taglist: @emryb

#azriel acotar imagine #azriel x oc #eris x azriel #azriel x you #azriel imagien #azriel x reader #azriel imagine #azriel spymaster #azriel shadowsinger #azriel acotar #acotar x reader #acotar imagine #acotar x you #acotar x oc #lucien vanserra x reader #eris vanserra x you

[magics-neptunes-things]

Ready, Aim, Shot

Hi! ♥ I hope you are all ok!

I have trouble finishing all the stories I started, but I’m working on it!

This one took me a little longer to write, I hope you like it. It is a little different from what I have written so far, but it is following a request from an anonymous:)

Summary: You’re a journalist and you were sent to a complicated place in the world. Will the attack you suffered prevent you from finding your girlfriend’s arms permanently?

TW: Angst, mention of war and bomb, accident, hospitalization.

PART 2 | PART 3

____________________________________________________________

Alexia is the only woman you fell in love with, and everyday you find yourself falling even harder for her. She was perfect for you. Caring, loving, loyal, attentive and sweat. Your bond is even more special than you ever dreamed before you became a couple.

However, things could have started more easily. You are a journalist/reporter and you know perfectly well that celebrities are not fond of this kind of profession, for good reason. When you found yourself following her for days for the report "Alexia: Labor Omnia Vincit", she was very professional at first. Like, really very very professional. But you lived with her for weeks, met her relatives and finally you found yourself covering her with heart eyes.

What you never imagined was that things could be reciprocal.

Shortly after announcing your relationship, at your friends and family only, you quickly settled together. Your cat met officially Nala at that time and you were spending happy days all four in Alexia’s apartment. I mean, your apartment now.

There are sometimes a few days during which you can't see each other, when Alexia leave for football or when you go in another country for a report. You go watch Alexia at every opportunity you have, enjoying to see her evolve in her element. And you know that Alexia reads or looks the articles or reports you participate in.

Alexia has already had a lot of trouble accepting that you go to eastern Europe last month for a report, so it's with a ball in the belly that you come home tonight. You have to tell her you’re leaving for another complicated place in the world and you know it’s going to be hard for her to accept.

You nervously bite the inside of your lip when you open the door of your apartment, immediately greeted by Nala who comes to rub in your legs, almost making you fall. You laugh gently and lift her off the floor to put a kiss on her skull before resting her gently. Your cat, for its part, opens an eye from its cat tree, long before turning and falling asleep again.

"Thanks for the welcome, Diabolo" you grumble.

You roll your eyes and hang your coat in the cupboard of the entrance before going in search of Alexia. Her sneakers at the entrance and a pleasant smell of food floats in the air, informing you that she’s home. Nala is ahead of you, running towards the kitchen, where you find your girlfriend.

The smile she gives you when you arrive takes your breath away and you accelerate the step to have her faster against you. Your face in her neck, you breathe her smell before putting a kiss, then several along his jaw to finish on her lips.

"Holà mi Amor"

She says to you smiling, passing both hands in your hair.

"Holà."

You let her kiss you again before taking a look at the stove to see what is in the pots.

"Did you finish training early?" You ask when you realize she’s had time to prepare all this and shower before you come home.

"No" she laughs softly "My mom came by to bring us what she cooked for her dinner with her friends tonight. Apparently she planned too big"

"Like she didn’t mean to"

You laugh too and Alexia throws you a smile and a amused look. You both know that she cooked huge quantities on purpose to be able to bring you some, Alba surely received her part too and you wouldn't be surprised to learn that your sister also received Eli’s visit with a tupperware filled with paella.

"Do I have time to shower?"

You want to get comfortable quickly, knowing the discussion you have to bring later. You think you’ll wait until the end of the meal though, not wishing to spoil your girlfriend’s appetite.

"If I had known, I would have waited for you" Alexia whispers, sliding her hands dangerously close to your butt.

"Alexia Putellas Segura, you are worse than a male teenager" you smile against her lips before kissing her tenderly. "I make it quickly."

After a quick shower, you go straight into Alexia’s clothes section of the wardrobe, choosing an old FC Barcelona jogging you love and one of her t-shirts with a Nike logo.

"It seems that you are wrong again on the side of the cupboard mi Amor" Alexia tells you with a knowing smile when you return to her.

"Oops."

********

After the meal, you sat on the sofa in the living room to watch the series that you started to follow recently. You still haven’t managed to talk about it, Alexia seems so relaxed and happy tonight that it breaks your heart to have to make this announcement.

However, your worry must be easily noticeable, since you feel Alexia’s hand on your fingers as you mechanically wiggle between them.

"Okay, what is it?" she asks you, slightly getting up to see you better.

"What?"

"You haven’t paid a single second of attention to the episode since we started it, you play nervously with your fingers and you keep biting your lip. What the hell is going on?"

You sigh softly and sit cross-legged on the couch, not finding the courage to look into her eyes. Beside you, you feel Alexia put herself in the same position. You feel her gaze on you as you speak again.

"I have to leave in three days for a new report" you finally confess.

"Where?"

"In the Middle East"

"No."

Alexia’s firm voice makes you look up and you can’t tell if her "No" is a ban she puts on you or if it's a form of denial to this information. Her eyebrows frown, her eyes are hard and you have to take it on yourself not to lower your eyes again.

"There’s no way you’re going. It’s too dangerous."

"This is my job, Ale" you point out lightly.

"I don’t care. You stay here, there is no fucking way that I let my girlfriend going right to death, your boss is completely crazy and irresponsible."

You watch her get up and go around in circles in the living room, talking while gesticulating her arms in all directions, scaring Nala in the same time.

"I’m not going alone, there will be my team with me."

"I. Don’t. Care."

********

Three days later, you find yourself at the airport with your team. By working together, they became your friends and Alexia knows them very well. And they know Alexia very well too. That’s probably why Lola asks you with surprise about the absence of your girlfriend to say goodbye.

"She didn’t want me to go"

You hardly swallow your saliva and thank Lola mentally for not insisting. Her compassionate smile is enough to bring some tears to your eyes, which you fortunately manage to stop.

Alexia is very mad at you. She tried emotional blackmail, anger, tears and pretty much everything in her possession to keep you close to her. The worst part is you would have preferred to stay with her, but you couldn’t refuse that warrant. You had already refused a report to manage Alexia’s anxiety a few days before and your boss warned you that it was the last refusal on your part that he accepted.

You don’t know if Lola passed on the information to the rest of the team, but they all show themselves to be particularly caring with you. Ben offers to check in your luggage and you gladly accept. You take a quick look at your phone and see that you have messages from your parents, your sister, Eli and Alba, but none from Alexia.

She left for her training saying goodbye of course, it was still out of the question to leave you angry. You can’t blame her, you know perfectly well that if things were reversed, you would react the same way. She too had tears in her eyes closing the door behind her and that didn’t help you leave your apartment earlier

"Well, look who’s here" Marta laughs.

Like the rest of your team, you turn to the point she’s staring off behind you. And you feel an electric current running through you when you recognize Alexia’s silhouette. She hasn’t seen you yet and you can see her look through the crowd with a desperate air, as if she were afraid of having arrived too late. Fortunately not, with the amount of material you have, boarding always takes forever.

Without hesitation, you split the crowd and she finally sees you. A few seconds later, you are in her arms and it's only now that you see Mapi over her shoulder. The tattooed one winks at you before getting away to give you some privacy.

"I thought I was too late"

Alexia’s voice came to you in a muffled way, her face being buried in your hair while she hugs you against her with all the strength of her arms. You give her back her embrace, certainly with much less force, but this embrace brings you the comfort you needed.

"Thanks for coming" you mumble back.

One hand in her hair and the other in the hollow of her back, you breathe deeply for the first time in three days. You stay like this for a few moments, before Alexia lets go of you with one hand to search in the pocket of her coat.

"I have something for you."

You watch her do and after a few seconds she show you a necklace with a pendant hanging. You would swear that something is hidden in it, but before you can question her on the subject, Alexia resumes speaking.

"You’ll open it on the plane, okay?"

You nod and let her hang the necklace around your neck. Her fingers make you shudder and you hurry to get back against her when she’s done. You don’t care if you’re being watched or even if someone recognized you. In any case, it’s been several weeks since edits of you two started appearing on the Internet. Alexia doesn’t seem to care much either since she’s the one who initiates your kiss.

"Promise me you’ll come back"

"I promise"

Her forehead leaning against yours and her look in yours makes you forget the rest of the world around you. The place where you fly is dangerous, you are perfectly aware of it. And Alexia too. She doesn’t make you make those promises every time, but only when she knows there’s a risk.

"I hate your job."

Her remark makes you smile softly and you replace a lock of her hair behind her ear before resuming speech.

"I think this is the last time I leave"

"What do you mean?"

The surprise forces Alexia to take off her face from yours to be able to better observe you. Her hazel look plunges into yours when you shrug your shoulders.

"It gets too complicated for both of us and I don’t have the same pleasure doing what I do anymore. I’ll talk to my boss when I get back, but I’m thinking of resigning"

Alexia’s face becomes perfectly smooth under the shock of the information and she blinks several times before responding.

"I- I never asked you to quit" she stutters, making you smile.

"I know"

You smile in front of her amazed air and kiss her tenderly on the cheek. You have been working for the same people for many years and have made a name for yourself in the profession. And even if a job change is turned down, you know you’ll find something else elsewhere.

You hear Lola calling you gently behind you, meaning it’s time for you to go. Alexia looks at you and your smiles are more like grimaces. It’s time to say goodbye.

"Take care of yourself and don’t let Diabolo eat too much."

"I will"

A new kiss is exchanged before you have to release her. You take a quick look in the direction of your team, most go up to the departures floor thanks to the escalator, only Lola is waiting patiently for you downstairs.

"Be careful, mi Amor. Think of me?"

"Every second of the day Cariño."

A few hours later, you are installed on your plane seat, window side. As if to better stick to your mood, the rain began to fall on Barcelona, drawing shapes on the porthole through which you look. Remembering the pendant that Alexia gave you, you gently take it in your hand to better observe it. You have no trouble finding the security to open it and inside you discover a rolled paper that you unfold. You smile and realize it’s a picture of you and Alexia. Behind it, she wrote a note.

"Forever with you. Te amo tanto. Alexia ♥"

********

Since your arrival, you have been able to exchange several messages and phone calls with Alexia. Things are going better than you both imagined, to your relief. You are not exactly in the middle of the conflict, the work you were asked to do being more focused on the population who decides to enlist in the army to defend their country. You are protected by soldiers who follow you like your shadow and you even feel safe.

It's the mind entirely turned towards the report that you climb in the jeep that brings you and your team where you have to meet several people to interview them. You have to go back to Barcelona in two days and your idea to resign is still on your mind. The more you think about it, the more you know it’s the right thing to do.

You are listening with amusement to Ben talking about his son’s latest mischief when something happens. A click, followed by the panic cries of the men around you. They express themselves in their native language that you don't master, or very briefly. A few seconds later, a heat wave lifts you off the ground and you are thrown out of the vehicle, unconscious, the mine you drove over blowing up everything around.

********

When Eli and Alba appear on the edge of the training field, Alexia knows something bad happened. The joke she was exchanging with Ona gets stuck in her throat and her face visibly pale. Jonathan accompanies them and beckons her to come to them. It's with tingling throughout the body that Alexia stands up and makes her way towards them.

"What happened?" she immediately asks, looking her mother in the eye.

"Y/N's team ran over amine. Half of them are still missing"

It's Alba who speaks, making Alexia look in her direction. Unable to open her mouth, she waits for further information.

"Y/N has been found, but it's not good Ale"

"What do you mean "it's not good?" "

Alexia gets upset, bringing their mother in the conversation for the first time. Obviously she fears the reaction of her eldest, knowing how attached you are to each other.

"Alexia…" she makes a soothing tone by grabbing her daughter’s arm.

"But just tell me! She’s dead, isn’t she?"

Alexia’s tone rises and she must take it upon herself not to push the physical contact initiated by her mother. Eli and Alba exchange a look before the first one resumes speaking.

"No, but she’s in a bad state. She was found unconscious and is on an official ventilator. They don’t yet know how badly she’s hurt. As we speak, she’s still in a coma and they don't know if she will make it."

********

The days that followed were a summary of hell for Alexia, your parents and your relatives in general. Due to the geographical distance, the news has reached them in dribs and drabs only by the interval of your team. Your boss got yelled at by Alexia, your father and Alexia’s mother. If you weren’t about to resign, there’s no doubt he’d demand you do.

After a few days of staying together at your parents', your loved ones have finally started their lives again. Your sister went back to work, but Alexia literally had to be taken out by force to agree to return to the training grounds. To make sure her daughter would go, Eli even asked Irene to come pick her up.

The information about you is vague but they know the main thing, you’re still alive. "She promised to come back to me" Alexia repeated several times, both to convince herself and to reassure others.

Even if she will never admit it, seeing her friends makes Alexia feel better. She strongly suspects them of doing everything to change her mind, but she is sincerely grateful. It changes her from the four walls of your parents' living room or yours, even if your animals also bring her comfort and affection.

Alexia is in the middle of a discussion with Mapi and Aitana when her phone rings from her bag. As always, she feels a mixture of feelings at the idea of dropping out, fearing bad news. But it’s usually your mother who gets calls from your bosses to give them news. It’s been three days now since they learned anything new.

Seeing that the call number is unknown, Alexia hesitates a few seconds before answering but ends up doing so. Normally, people with access to her phone number are allowed to have it. She has never had any problems with that.

"Holà?"

The silence settles on the other side of the phone and the Latin checks that she has picked up before putting the phone back against her ear.

"Is there anyone here?"

A new silence sets in. Just as she was about to hung up, Alexia finally hears a voice at the other end. The voice is barely higher than a whisper, as if the person were particularly exhausted.

"Ale? It’s me…"

The ground slips under the captain’s feet so abruptly that neither Mapi nor Aitana has time to catch her. Sitting on the floor, the one who had managed not to shed a single tear since the announcement of your accident melts into tears, alerting her two friends who are now convinced that something dramatic is happening.

Alexia let a flood of curses that you’ve never heard come out of your girlfriend’s lips when she realizes it’s you on the phone.

"I’m alive" you end up adding, not really knowing what to add.

"You had better" sobs Alexia before finally raising her eyes on Mapi.

Lost in her emotions, she didn’t realize that her reaction alerted almost the entire team. Ona, who had gone to take her shower, kneels beside Mapi, both leaning in the direction of their friend and captain while others stand in an arc around her.

"It’s Y/N. She did it."

********

Your parents had already had to detain Alexia so that she wouldn’t jump on the first plane upon learning of your accident, but this time it was even worse. With the injuries you’ve got, you couldn’t go home right away. The translation was sometimes complicated at first, until the Spanish embassy sent someone to do the translation. From there, you were able to recover your phone and thus be in contact with Alexia and your loved ones more easily. The connection is not always optimal, but having your girlfriend only a call from you does you a lot of good.

It's not in very good condition that you get on the plane to repatriate you to Barcelona, but you specifically asked to return as soon as possible, even if you were then hospitalized in Spain. During the explosion, it was mostly the left side of your body that was injured. In addition to a crumbling shoulder, broken ribs and a damaged knee, you find yourself with a head injury and a broken nose that fortunately had time to deflate. Thanks to that you no longer look like a boxer at the end of his career but it looks like you have two big cockroaches.

You learned yesterday that three of your six team members didn't survive the attack. Ben and Lola have already returned to Spain and it's with a hint of guilt that you leave Marta alone on the spot. But her family is coming in two days and she swore to you that everything was fine for her.

Exhausted by the journey to the airport, you slept all the way back and it is only when the wheels of the plane touch the ground that you open your eyes with a start. The person assigned by the embassy to follow you smiles kindly and you answer vaguely, before looking out the window. When you see the airport building, you feel your heart speed up. Alexia is waiting for you, a few hundred meters from you.

You tried to refuse to be moved around in a wheelchair, in vain. So it is with a sulky pout that you find yourself traveling through the airport, to the place to collect your belongings. The good news is that you had left almost all to your camp and so you were able to recover everything. Even the necklace offered by your girlfriend survived and did not leave your neck a single squad then you left Barcelona.

Your suitcase is much too long for your taste to arrive and you refrain from jumping on your chair of impatience when it is time to pass the security control of customs. Everything is going too slowly and you are convinced that you would go faster by limping with your crutch. But you finally arrive in the main arrival hall and it only takes you two seconds to spot Alexia, your eyes are attracted to her like a magnet. By the time she comes to you, you get up from the chair and two seconds later you’re finally where you want to be forever. In her arms.

The embrace is not very practical, your arm in sling prevents you from holding her as you would like and you clench your teeth not to flinch despite your painful ribs. You still feel that Alexia is doing everything she can to be delicate. She has not yet been able to truly realize all of your injuries.

But in the end you don’t care, because it’s all about her. Alexia feels like she can breathe completely for the first time in about ten days. You feel her coming off of you after a few minutes and you have trouble supporting her gaze. You know that you look terrible, even if you are not the type to wear kilos of makeup every day, there you are really far from being to your advantage.

"Mi Amor" she whispers tenderly, holding your face in her hands before as much delicacy as if it had been porcelain. Her thumbs caress your cheeks and you feel tears in your eyes. "It’s over. You’re home."

You nod and close your eyes, letting her kiss you tenderly before she takes you back against her.

Needless to say, the next day your boss received a letter of resignation from you. Thanks to what happened to you, you received a starting bonus, allowing you to have money set aside before embarking on your new project, writer and WAG. Because from now on, it’s out of the question to part with Alexia for more than half a day.

#woso x reader #woso imagine #alexia putellas x reader #alexia putellas imagine

[mypoisonedvine]

𝒶 𝓁𝒾𝓉𝓉𝓁𝑒 𝓁𝒶𝓉𝑒 || eddie munson x reader

𝓈𝓊𝓂𝓂𝒶𝓇𝓎 || sometimes, the best things happen when you're a little late.

𝓌𝑜𝓇𝒹 𝒸𝑜𝓊𝓃𝓉 || 2.7k

𝓌𝒶𝓇𝓃𝒾𝓃𝑔𝓈 || implied smut/established relationship (18+), unplanned pregnancy, reader's parents are controlling, no descriptions of pregnancy/childbirth, dad!eddie, implied preppy/rich reader but it's not discussed much

this is just a short and sweet little fic based on a random idea I had, totally different from what I normally do but I hope y'all like it!!

“Hey pumpkin,” he purred as you sat on his desk, resting one of those beautiful ringed hands on your thigh.  You had been practicing how you were going to say this all weekend and now you felt like you’d forgotten it somehow; he had that effect on you.

Taking a deep breath, you saw his eyes narrow for a second and his head tilt— he knew something was up, but he didn’t have to ask what before you blurted it out: “I’m late.”

He frowned and looked at the clock on the classroom wall; “It’s still three minutes until class?” he observed.

“Eddie…” you whispered, feeling so— something.  This crazy feeling you’d had for days now; this weird, nervous, insecure kind of feeling.  This oh my god is this happening to me feeling.  

He looked at you, waiting for more context, and you chewed your lip as you looked away.  Then he seemed to get it, and his chest sunk.  “O-oh, fuck.”

“Yeah.”

“I— okay,” he breathed, leaning in closer to you.  “Like… how late?”

“Four days?”

“Shit,” he hissed, glancing out the window and back at you— like there was gonna be someone standing outside holding up a sign for him that would tell him what to say.  But there wasn’t, and he obviously had no fucking idea what to say.  “Shit,” he said again.

“Yeah,” you also said again.

He stood up from his desk, lowering his voice and standing closer to you so (hopefully) only you could hear; thankfully nobody else seemed to be paying either of you much attention, just trying to get ready for class.  You wished you could think about class right now.  “What do we— I mean, how do we— I— when will you know?  Like, for sure?”

Even with all this fear (and nausea) swirling inside you, you still almost swooned at those big brown eyes, looking at you like this.  You could tell he was terrified, just as much as you, but he couldn’t hide the small edge of excitement— as much as this is supposed to be every young guy’s worst nightmare, you knew a part of him was thrilled at the chance of it.

You were too, though you were too embarrassed to admit that even to yourself.  It was horribly misguided; your parents didn’t even know you’d been seeing Eddie, because you’d figured they would have a heart attack if they knew.  This was going to be armageddon— if it was really going to happen.  You were still hoping it was just an unpredictable period and a whole lot of wasted emotion.

“I won’t know for sure until I go to a doctor,” you answered, “but I can’t really do that without tipping off my parents…”

“I’ll drive you,” he decided.

“And… if it’s…?” you dared to mumble, nervously glancing down, preparing for him to answer that he would drive you to a different doctor…

Instead, he opened his mouth and the bell rang.  “We’ll talk about that later,” he decided.  

“Okay,” you breathed.  “I— yeah, we’ll talk about it.  We’ll… figure something out.”

He pulled you in for a kiss suddenly, and it soothed you a bit as you melted into his arms.  The teacher cleared her throat; “I’d oblige you to return to your own classroom, Miss?” she instructed.

Eddie didn’t let you go quite yet, though, holding your face and looking at you closely.  “It’s gonna be okay,” he promised.  “No matter what happens, it’s gonna be okay.  Okay?”

“Okay.”

He kissed your forehead one more time as he hugged you, and then you took your leave, back to your class, where you had no hope of focusing.

~

“If you do— I mean, if it is—” he kept stopping and starting over— “and if it’s mine—”

“Eddie!” you frowned, smacking him on the arm.

“Sorry, sorry— I know you’re not— sorry,” he mumbled, “I just mean… that’s my baby.  Our baby.”

You bit your lip.

“I-if it is, you know, there, I mean,” he mitigated.

“Okay, so if it is— if I am… what do you want me to do?” you asked.

“Whatever you need to do,” he nodded.  “Whatever’s right for you.  I mean, I know your parents…”

He trailed off, and you raised your brows as you nodded.  “Yeah…”

“So if you have to… I understand,” he insisted.

“But what do you want me to do?” you asked again.

He chewed his lip.  “It’s your choice.”

“I know,” you groaned, “but if you could choose what I was going to do for me—”

“Which I would never do,” he announced proudly.

“What would you hypothetically want me to do if it was up to you?” you pressed.  “And don’t say I should do what’s best for me,” you warned, causing him to shut his mouth which he’d just opened.

“I… uh, well, I guess…” he stalled, looking down; but you could tell he already knew what he wanted, he was just trying to find the courage to say it.  Getting a serious look on his face, he finally admitted it: “I’d want you to keep it.  I’d want us to… have it, raise it.”

You sighed, smiling with relief— you felt the same way, but didn’t want to say it first, in case it pressured him into feeling like he had to be involved.  And the last thing you wanted was to raise a baby with someone only there out of obligation.

“I know we’re young, and it’s sooner than either one of us wanted this to happen,” he continued, “but I don’t… I don’t want you to think of our baby as a mistake.  Not planned, sure, a little unexpected… but if we do this, it’s not a mistake.  It’s two people who love each other starting a family together.”

He stepped closer to you, holding your hands tightly as you smiled.

“But that’s just if I was in charge of everything, which I’m not,” he laughed.  

“No, that’s what I want, too,” you admitted.  “But, if that’s gonna happen, I have to tell my parents first.”

Eddie blew out a long breath that inflated his cheeks.  “Yeah.  Good luck with that.”

You raised an eyebrow, and he coughed.

“Uh, I mean— I’ll come with you, if you want, obviously.  Your dad doesn’t own any guns, right?”

You laughed a little, leaning forward to rest your head on his chest with a sigh.  “He won’t literally kill you, Ed— but I think I should do it myself, just so they have a chance to meet you when things are less… emotional, I guess.”

“Yeah,” he breathed, kissing the top of your head and petting your hair as you leaned on him.  “S’gonna be okay, pumpking, even if they get mad at first.”

You nodded, replying “I know,” but you didn’t really know.  You had this sick feeling in your stomach, terrified of how they would react— especially considering you’d already been formally banned from seeing Eddie anymore.

You waited, of course, to tell them until you were late enough that something had to be said— actually, they nearly figured it out once the sudden bouts of nausea began.  If either of you had known what would happen after they found out, you would’ve cherished that time before more carefully.

one year later…

It took about half a second for Wayne to figure it out, seeing you on his doorstep with a baby on your hip.

His nephew had been listless ever since you left, and it took him a while to even say what was going on— but after a few times of innocently asking if that girl’s ever gonna come around again, Wayne finally assumed that you’d dumped him.  But apparently, it was far worse than that; when he had a few beers in him, Eddie told the whole story about how a broken condom led to a missed period and about a dozen positive at-home tests.  And that, apparently, wasn’t the issue— he admitted he’d wanted to go through with it, offered to marry you, got excited about having a child even if he felt totally overwhelmed at the idea of becoming a father.

I figured I could do it better than mine, Eddie told his uncle, a little somber smile on his face, and that made me feel better.  Kind of a low bar, but still.  I’d’ve done anything for that baby… for our baby…

But that was when he got choked up and struggled to say much more, until Wayne eventually pulled it out of him.  Her parents, man, they hate me— guess I can understand why, ‘cept they never even met me.  She told ‘em and they just went ballistic.  And they… she’s gone.

‘Gone’ as in, shipped off to live with extended family in another state and, presumably, have the pregnancy quietly ‘taken care of’.  You’d told him from the start that’s probably what they’d do, or at least make you give it up for adoption.  They told their country club and cotillion friends you were studying abroad, to save the shame of admitting their daughter was knocked up by a trailer park freak.

Well, apparently Eddie had been slightly wrong about what happened to the baby after you disappeared, and now, here you were.  And Wayne was staring at you, with that sweet-but-slightly-terrified look in your eyes.

“Is Eddie here?” you asked meekly; because what else would you ask?

Wayne sighed.  “No, he’s at work— he’ll be back in an hour.”

Your eyes lit up a little, even through all that fear you had on your face.  “He has a job?”

“Yeah, at the oil change place on Main,” Wayne nodded.  “You can wait for him here, if you don’t mind.”

You smiled a little; “F’course I don’t,” you assured, “and… well, I figured you might wanna meet her, too.”

Wayne smiled back, feeling like he was finally allowed to address the adorable, chubby-cheeked elephant in the room.  

“Say hi to Uncle Wayne,” you instructed the baby sweetly, and she smiled but tucked her face into your shoulder.

“Hi, beautiful,” he smiled at her, waving with just the tips of his fingers.  “Wow, got your daddy’s eyes, don’tcha?”

You felt your face warm as he noticed it— of course, it wasn’t like there was much chance this was anybody else’s baby, but knowing that Wayne knew made you slightly nervous he would judge you somehow (since everyone else had).  Instead, he brought you both inside and started making tea.

~

When Eddie’s van pulled up outside the trailer, you glanced at Wayne nervously.  He nodded towards the door, adding, “I’ll watch her— just go.”

Your legs were a little shaky as you stood up off the couch, but you did your best to breathe normally as you opened the door and stepped out onto the lawn.

Eddie was getting groceries out of the back of his van, and your heart rate picked up even more as you waited for him to see you; you worried he wouldn’t want to, after you disappeared on him.  You’d never had a chance to say goodbye, to explain what was going on or why you were leaving… he could hate you, if he wanted, for abandoning him.

But when he did see you, and you shyly shrugged a little as you waited for a reaction, he dropped the grocery bags on the ground and ran to you.

“Oh my god!” he laughed excitedly, pulling you into a tight bear hug.  “Pumpkin, I thought I might never see you again…”

You hugged him back, wanting to think of something to say but getting too caught up in holding him again, in burying your face in his soft shirt and smelling his cologne; this was all you’d been thinking about for most of the last year.

“I missed you so much,” Eddie began as he let you go for a moment, looking at you like he wanted to be sure you were really here, “and I wanted to call, or write or something, but I couldn’t— I guess you couldn’t either— and I barely got out of bed for a week after you left, just ask Wayne— how long have you been waiting?  Are your boobs bigger?”

You started to laugh, covering your face with your hands and Eddie’s laughed thinly as his face tinted pink.

“Sorry, I didn’t wanna say anything,” he mumbled, “but like, they’re bigger, right?”

You nodded.  “Yeah— it’s ‘cause I’m breastfeeding…”

He blinked quickly, and you bit your lip as you waited for a reaction.  “I thought— I figured your parents had made you— I— pumpkin,” he breathed, and your heart twisted.  “Is this really…?  I mean, I’m not dreaming, am I?”

You shook your head.  “I’m sorry I couldn’t visit before— I wanted you to meet her so bad, I just—”

“Her?” he repeated, and you only started to choke up when you saw the tears in his eyes; you nodded.  “I— oh my god, I love you,” he said simply, wiping a tear off his cheek before hugging you again— not as tight as before but somehow warmer and sweeter.

“I love you too,” you whispered, “I’m sorry I left, I’m sorry I couldn’t call, I swear I wanted to but—”

“Don’t be sorry for anything, okay?” he interrupted you, kissing the top of your head as he began to rock you side to side in the hug.  “I’m just so happy you’re here…”

“Sh-she’s here too,” you blurted out, making him freeze and look down at you.  “She’s inside, with Wayne, if you wanna…?”

He sniffled as he wiped another tear away; “Y-yeah, of course… of course I do, wow, yeah.  Okay.”

“I-it’s okay if you’re not ready yet,” you assured, but he laughed.

“Are you kidding?  I’ve been waiting for this since… I don’t even know how long— since you sat on my desk in Science class…”

You beamed and hugged him again before you walked together into the trailer.

When you and Eddie stepped inside, Wayne was bouncing her on his knee— she was reaching up to grab his face, a new favorite hobby of hers, and he scrunched up his nose and closed one eye as her little hands explored his rough, stubbly features.  Eddie already looked overcome with emotion just watching the scene before him, staring forward at her with a slack mouth and shiny eyes, and he hadn’t even seen her face yet; when you shut the door, the sound made her turn her head to look back at you.  He was still speechless, walking forward slowly and kneeling down in front of Wayne’s feet.  Wayne turned her to face him better, and Eddie wordlessly reached up towards her; she grabbed hold of one of his fingers, and he smiled and sniffled as he looked at her tiny fist and back up to her face.  “Hi there,” he greeted quietly.

“Eddie… this is Emily,” you introduced them quietly, and Eddie beamed as he glanced at you for a second before looking at her again.

“Hello, Emily,” he said, “I’m Eddie— I mean, dad.  I’m Daddy.  Nice to meet you.”

You snorted at how formal it was, but still had to wipe a tear from your eye.

“Can I hold her?” he asked quietly, nervously.

“Of course,” you breathed, almost heartbroken that he could ever imagine not being allowed to hold her— but then again, he never got to see her, or even know she existed, until now.

Wayne handed her off to Eddie, who put his hands under her arms— she was still so small, his grasp almost covered her whole body.  Standing up and taking her with him, Eddie stared at her for a moment with the most amazed smile on his face; she reached for that very face, and he laughed as she held on tight to his nose.

You were wondering if you’d have to guide him in how to hold her, but as he pulled her into a hug, he impressed you with how experienced he already looked— he looked like a dad, and he’d only been doing it for less than a minute.  It made your heart so full, finally seeing them together, finally seeing your baby in her father’s arms, finally feeling like your family was complete.

He bounced her in his arms, kissing her head and face, tears still striping his cheeks.  Hi baby, hi beautiful, hi gorgeous, hi Emily, he kept whispering to her.  Daddy loves you so much.  Daddy missed you.  

#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson fic #eddie munson x you

[petit-etoile]

Congrats on 200 followers! :D For drabble ideas, how about one where Tav is becoming overwhelmed from being the leader of their group and they end up having a bit of a breakdown in camp, so Astarion whisks them away and dotes on them for the evening to help soothe some of their worries.

i  am  tired  of  being  brave

pairing: astarion/tav wordcount:  1,036 content warnings: none other tags: canon compliant, introspection, character study, idiots in love, established relationship, gender neutral tav, human!tav archiveofourown: here.

tag list: @azrielshadows1nger, @pandimoostuff, @faevi, @microskies, @foreverthemaraudersera, @queenofthespacesquids, @claryvoyantfray, @6doodlaang14, @anne-isnotokay, @itshimbotime, @yeeteth-the-raven, @sessils,@8-opossums, @worryknotdear, @abirdaboxandachippedcup, be added to the taglist here

summary: All you want is to get away from everything. Astarion indulges you.

‘Enough!’ you shout.

Lae’zel and Shadowheart have the decency to look properly chagrined when they peer over at you, frozen as if turned to stone. Shadowheart’s knife dips underneath Lae’zel’s chin, but the pretense of applied pressure goes away. You have no idea what hour it is or how long they’ve been going at it but the little patience you have snaps like a fine thread.

‘We have only gotten this far because we trust each other,’ you snap at them, pulling your nightshirt tighter around your shoulders. ‘But if you want to ruin that, leave me out of it!’

In what is likely the silliest mistake to make, you turn around and march to your bedroll to pick up your hunting knife and then march beyond the outskirts of camp  —  beyond Halsin and Jaheira and Gale and Wyll and Karlach, and Withers who seems to be musing over the situation with faint interest.

If Shadowheart and Lae’zel want to fight to the death, let them! You’ve done all that you can to get the group this far. You’re tired, you’ve been woken up two nights in a row, and you’ve had it with the drama.

You plunge yourself through the nearest bush you can find and sit next to running water, your arms pulled across your chest to keep the breeze from chilling you to the bone. You’re miserable beneath the moonlight. You can’t remember the last time you’ve slept more than four hours.

You almost doze off in the underbrush beneath a tree, but then there’s a hand sliding over your mouth and a body behind yours, somehow wedged behind you once your eyes closed. You gasp and try to reach for your knife, but Astarion tuts and continues sliding between you and the tree. It would be annoying if you weren’t relieved it was him. You relax back against him despite the feeling that your heart is going to leap out of your throat.

‘You shouldn’t fall asleep in the woods,’ Astarion warns you. ‘There are terrible beasts that have made this place their hunting ground.’

You shiver. ‘I didn’t mean to fall asleep,’ you say. ‘I just needed to get away.’

He hums. ‘Did something happen back at the camp?’

It doesn’t do any good to keep secrets, and your other companions had already witnessed it. You tell Astarion about Lae’zel and Shadowheart’s never ending fight. It doesn’t make sense to keep attacking one another, especially since the Artefact is the only reason the worms haven’t burrowed deeper into your skulls. It wears you down every day to keep making decisions for everyone when there are people with better experience. Everyone looks to you no matter how much you wish they’d look elsewhere. You never wanted this fellowship to hang on your every word. You just wanted allies.

‘It’s hardly fair,’ Astarion agrees. ‘To have the weight of this…Absolute sitting on your shoulders. I can’t imagine what it must be like to wrangle us all into cohabitation.’

‘Some discomforts are easier to resolve than others,’ you say. ‘It was easy making everyone throw their stakes away.’

‘I’m fairly certain Wyll kept his,’ Astarion snorts.

‘Yes, but he doesn’t wake us all up holding it at your neck,’ you say, elbowing him. ‘They don’t have to become friends or lovers or anything of the sort. They just have to get along until we arrive at Baldur’s Gate.’

Baldur’s Gate still seems so very far away. Acknowledging this drags you down more than you wish it to. You’re tired of walking and fighting and lying your way out of every other conflict. You miss your family and your life before the worm. The only good that’s come of it is Astarion. He lets you lounge on him when you please in exchange for some blood, and…

It’s more than that.

Astarion lets you do whatever the hell you please as long as it doesn’t annoy him. You’re free to nap in his tent or sit at his side while he reads, and he’s even allowed you to style his delicate curls with pomade. He lets you kiss him if you ask, holds your hand. If you asked him to kill someone for you, you’re certain he would without question.

Reluctantly, you sit forward. ‘I should probably head back,’ you admit. ‘I should make sure everyone is still alive.’

‘To the hells with it,’ Astarion disagrees. He wraps his arms around your waist and pulls you back. ‘You close your eyes and sleep. Let them come looking for us if it troubles them that much.’

‘And if Shadowheart kills Lae’zel?’

‘I’m almost certain Lae’zel would win,’ he says. ‘But, I have no doubt they’ll behave. You, on the other hand, are being naughty.’

You laugh but you do as you're told. You worm further in the roots and lean back against him. It’s chilly, but having someone else there does wonders for how willing you are to fall asleep. It’s almost nice how secluded you are away from the drama and stress. You almost wish you were a vampire so that you could sneak out and use hunting as an excuse.

The respect for all you do is nice. Sure, Halsin and Jaheira have both commended you for how hard you work for your age, but it isn’t the same. You still stand in the middle of camp trying to handle things on your own. The planning, the decisions. They somehow fall on your shoulders. A little more input would be nice, or a sign from a god that you’re doing the right thing. You try not to think about it as you feel sleep edge toward your consciousness. Astarion hums softly in your ear, and though it’s uneven, you can’t help but think it’s so off-tune that it’s lovely.

You yawn so hard your jaw pops, and Astarion hushes you, kissing idly behind your ear. It lulls you into an ease you haven’t experienced for a while. You melt into the touch. If you could purr, you would.

‘This,’ Astarion says, ‘is what you deserve. To relax here in my arms. Sleep now, and we’ll deal with what shall come in the morning.’

#astarion #astarion ancunin #astarion bg3 #astarion x tav #astarion x you #astarion x reader #astarion x oc #from ，carcosa . #my fic #anonymous #* a thousand lives，and one #foreshadowing for the sake of this verse? #mayhap .

[sunflower-lilac42]

✧ 𝐎𝐧𝐥𝐲 𝐇𝐢𝐦 || flowers au ♔

summary: when her brothers visit, they send her in a spiral ending in a panic attack and only one person could help her.

warnings: depression, offing of themselves, stress, feelings of not being good enough, toxic thoughts, the lot

notes: another sad one, this happens before rescue. slightly different but more perspective on how adam and luca feel about it. feel free to ask anything for the au because i love hearing from you guys and i hope to answer some questions if you have any. add yourself to the taglist ➵ taglist!

au masterlist | nhl masterlist | main masterlist

They didn’t know what to do, they were pacing around her dorm room like madmen. Over the break, Luca and Adam decided to visit Violet since the three of them had missed each other. They had just been merely talking about school and how Luca was doing, playing NHL in the girl’s dorm room when Violet had dropped the controller. Her heart skipped a beat in nervousness and she looked at her desk that held the homework she needed to do. 

It was a hard time for Violet because even though she had the whole week off for break, she needed to stay back and work on her finals. She was majoring in four separate things, which she brought on herself but that wasn’t the point. Being close to finals she had so much work to do, in some classes, she had to write a paper, in others a final project, and in some a final exam and they still hadn’t finished learning all the material.

As much as she loved to be clean and organized, now wasn’t the time. If you walked into the freshman dorm room at this moment, you would not think it was Violet who lived there. Half of the projects she had to complete were on the desk, directions in a messy pile. Her notes for her exams and the study guide were all laid out in an unorganized manner, with her notes for her papers mixed in with them. 

Luca, being the big brother he was, kneeled in front of the girl, placing his hands on her knees, “Hey, V. I need you to breathe for me, alright?”

Telling her to breathe was not the most helpful. And not that it was their fault, but they weren’t the best at comforting her. Being the primary root of her anxiety and depression (unknowingly and unconsciously their fault and she knew that), it was hard for her to talk about these problems with her. She knew the two were inquisitive and they would ask what was wrong or if there was anything they could do to fix it, that’s all they wanted to do. They wanted to fix things without any prior knowledge of the things going on, they always thought they could when they couldn’t. 

That was the difference between them and Connor. Being able to open up to Connor was much easier when she didn’t have to worry about him knowing them. Of course, Connor knew Adam, he had met him a few times and got to know him during the draft but he didn’t know him know him. So any previous knowledge of the two disappeared when Violet started to open up. This meant that Connor knew what to do in this situation, and even if he didn’t he kept the conversation tame for both of them. 

When she shook her head at Luca’s words, he almost started crying too. He had never seen his baby sister look this broken before. He was trying to hold it together for both of them. He turned his head to see why the room was silent besides Violet’s hyperventilating breaths and choking sobs, Adam had almost started to hyperventilate himself, sitting on her bed and hand to his chest. 

“Adam, hey hey. It’s okay, bud. She's going to be fine, alright.” Luca knew how to handle Adam when he broke down, the two were inseparable. 

He glanced between his sister and his brother, his little siblings. How was he supposed to pick? Violet’s was more severe but he had no idea how to get her to calm down, while Adam could calm down in five minutes and then go back to her, so that’s what he did. He got up and walked over to his brother, bringing him into a hug, calming him. 

Adam’s breaths were shallow but evened out within seconds, meanwhile Violet’s had only gotten worse. Her mind was in overdrive, many thoughts popping into her head every second that only got worse when Luca appeared but worsened again when he left.

‘He doesn’t care.’ ‘He can’t handle me.’ ‘I’m only being a burden.’ ‘I’m annoying.’ ‘He’s leaving me, they’re leaving me.’ ‘They think I’m annoying.’

Luckily, at that moment, Ollie barged into the room getting ready to announce something when she saw the scene. Having this become almost second nature to her, she went through her tactics; holding Violet’s hand, the 5 senses method that only worked once in every 5 tries, and even tried talking about hockey to get her mind distracted from whatever she was currently thinking about, but her voice wasn’t the same as Connor’s and that’s what she needed. 

Ollie scrambled to take her phone out of her back pocket and Adam and Luca panicked once more, “Why wasn’t that helping?”

“Not the time.”

“What are you doing?”

“Are you done? Obviously, nothing you tried, if you even did try, fucking helped. Maybe if you paid more attention and were mentally aware of what’s happening to her you’d know how to handle this situation.”

It was a low blow, Ollie knew that Violet had a hard time talking to the boys, but all in all, it was partly true. If Violet felt more comfortable around them and their big personalities she could talk to them about it. Adam and Luca weren’t the type of people to deal with this stuff. Yes, it was her fault at some points and she acknowledged that and she acknowledged the fact that sometimes it wasn’t something either of them could control.

She tried to not make it worse for the girl but after everything she’d heard about her and her mental health coinciding with her brothers, the damage the two had unintentionally done, she couldn’t hold back. She heard her roommate's breathing pick up and finished finding the number to call, “Hello?”

“Hi, no time to talk. V’s having a panic attack.”

She could hear the boy on the other side swear profanities, “Put her on.”

Ollie handed her best friend the phone and Violet held it with two hands against her ear, “I can’t breathe.” 

She sobbed trying to contain everything that she was doing, “I know, honey, I know. I’m here, okay? Do you think you can try to take a deep breath?” As much as she tried, so couldn’t.

She merely shook her head, no answer was able to form, “Hey. Violet?”

His voice was smooth, calm, and steady and didn’t hold a single ounce of worry or unsureness in it, but if anyone were to see him right now, his eyes would be wide and forming tears, his forehead would be wrinkled and his eyebrows were pinched together. His body was tense, his fist clenching and unclenching. He bit his lip in silence and bounced his leg up and down, “V, what’s happening? Talk to me. Come on, pretty girl.”

“N-no. I can’t.”

Luca and Adam looked dumbfounded, in the matter of just knowing who was on the other line she was able to speak and form sane thoughts. They mentally kicked themselves in the ass for not being able to do that. They should know how to care for their sister. For all they knew there was some person on the other line that had barely known her for six months that was able to do things that they should’ve been able to do for the past 6 years. They exchanged glances in worry, Adam wiping off the tears from his face. 

“It’s okay,” his voice went silent, thinking through the list of tactics he had created for when she got like this. 

He had created it when she told him about her intense panic attacks, he needed to be prepared for when it happened. Talking about her brothers was out of the question as they were visiting and in the same room as her, telling her about practice also wasn’t an option because he hadn’t had practice that day. 

He tapped his foot hoping she couldn’t hear it but that fell short, “Are you okay?”

This wasn’t what she was supposed to be worrying about, but at least her mind was on something else, right?

No, her mind now plagued her with thoughts of how she was stressing out Connor, how she was just a burden to him as well, that he didn’t really want to be doing this right now it was just another chore for him, he had too much on his plate and shouldn’t have to deal with her. 

“Perfectly fine, no need to worry, sweet girl. I just have a song stuck in my head.”

“What song?”

“Steal my girl.”

“I like that song.”

“Oh you do?”

“Mhm. Um, I think it’s getting worse…”

“What do you mean it’s getting worse?” Luca’s voice was stern, wanting nothing more in the world for this to stop and for her to be okay.

The harshness of his voice made her jump and tears formed in her eyes again, “Don’t yell at her.”

“Who’s yelling, V?”

“Not Ollie.” Violet didn’t want to explicitly throw her brothers under the bus so that was the safest option was to say who it wasn’t.

“You want to tell me about some flowers?”

“What kind?’

“Sunflowers.”

“I love sunflowers.”

“Oh, really, why?” Connor knew the answer, Luke was one of her best friends so that was one of the first flowers she had told him about when it came up in conversation.

“They remind me of Luke.”

Her sentences were short which meant she was still trapped in her little mind bubble, “And why’s that sweetheart?”

“Because when I met him he made me laugh not even two minutes later. He makes me laugh a lot, every time I see him. When he walks into a room, everyone gets really excited and visibly gets happier. I like to call him a little ray of sunshine.”

Connor chuckled, “You excited to see him soon?”

“Yeah. I miss him.”

“You know what, I think I saw some sunflowers yesterday.”

“How and where? It’s the middle of November, C.” 

The name immediately alarmed him, a codename that they had set back when Violet had visited him in Chicago. She never called him that, she hated the name and so did he. For the two of them, it meant she felt like she couldn’t speak freely to him, like someone in the room didn’t know about them or they made her feel unsafe. Even if she was having a hard time but couldn’t say, “Your brothers still there?”

“Mhm.”

“You wanna give the phone to Ollie real quick? I promise you Violet I won’t be gone for more than a few seconds. You think you can do it?”

The way Connor said her name made her body un-tense, it was his way of reassuring her that whatever he said was true, that he was going to be back in a few seconds. She handed the girl her phone, causing confusion to rise on her face, “Hi?”

“Get Adam and Luca out of there now.”

She didn’t need another word, standing and walking up to them “I need you to leave.”

“What no! We need to make sure she’s okay.”

“You two being here, isn’t helping. Leave. I’m not asking again.”

The boys continued their protests which left Ollie with one final option. She grabbed both of their sleeves, harshly dragging the two hockey players out of her dorm room and shutting the door when they were in the hallway. 

“All better now?”

“Yeah, Connie.”

“Still feeling a little panicky?”

“A little.” Knowing that she could talk to Connor freely now without her brothers figuring out who he was or why she was acting like this made her breathe a little more. 

“That’s good. You want to talk more or you want me to?”

That was another and the main difference between her brothers and Connor. Connor offered the breath, he offered to talk about things, he offered for her to talk or for him to talk. He never made her do anything. Most people would demand things out of her when she was this riled up, for her to breathe or to calm down, they would shout at her to get through to her when all she needed was a soothing voice, a way to distract her thoughts from what initially caused this. 

“You, please.”

“Okay, well I’m excited to see you in a couple of days. We can walk around the city if you want, go Christmsa shopping. Ride around on some trains, because I know how much you like them. We can look to see what Christmas decorations they have up already. We can go see the Christkindl Market in Wrigleyville. I know you’ll probably want to go to Billy Goats, and maybe I have a present for you to open up….”

That seemed to calm her down a lot, the idea of getting to see Connor soon and do all of these things with him felt like a breath of fresh air. She hadn’t seen him in a couple weeks and even then it was only for two days and he had games both of those days. Before then they hadn’t seen each other in four months.

“A present, you say?”

Her usual sarcastic nature and tone were back, making the boy smile, “Oh yeah, I wrapped it all by myself.”

“That’s a scary thought.”

Connor gasped, “Offensive, Miss. Violet.”

“It’s the truth.”

Connor laughed causing her to as well, Connor calming her down was a success that would later have to be described to her brothers but that was a thought for another time.

𝑻𝑨𝑮𝑳𝑰𝑺𝑻 ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

if your name is crossed out it means i couldn't tag you

@ivy-34 | @itsnotgray | @daisysnhl | @love4ldr | @dancerbailey3 | @love4lando | @thescooby-gang | @biscuit-muffin05

#hockey #nhl #sunnyluneflowers #sunny lune writes #connor bedard #connor bedard x reader #connor bedard x fantilli!sister #connor bedard x fantilli!reader #chicago blackhawks #nhl blackhawks #adam fantilli x reader #adam fantilli #adam fantilli x sister!reader #luca fantilli #luca fantilli x reader #luca fantilli x sister!reader #cb98

[wenigstenshabeichesversucht]

You've made your bed, now lie in it

Pairing: Anthony Lockwood x fem!Reader

Summary: 3 times you and Lockwood have to share a bed, and one time you want to share a bed.

Warnings: one bed trope, fake dating trope, fluff, only kissing, no smut, english is not my native language

Word Count: 3.9k

After a longer break I'm finally back. Enjoy!

The first time you and Lockwood, an insolent prick of a boss, had to share a bed, was comparable to a train wreck. You wanted to look away, but you couldn’t. This was how you felt, when you stared at the way too small bed in front of you. You wanted to look away, but you couldn’t. And even if you could, where did you want to look? At the face of your far too handsome boss, hell no! Or at the floor, which was so dirty, that you were sure, that nobody cleaned it for at least a year? No, not happening.

“I will not sleep on the floor”, you stated without removing your eyes from the bed.

“Me neither!”

Hearing his voice made you seethe.  Maybe he was your boss, but he wasn’t your friend. George and Lucy were your friends, but never him.

“You booked this flop house!”, you protested.

You had a mission two hours away from London, which required you to stay for two days. Luck wasn't on your side when Lucy and George got sick four days ago, leaving only you and Lockwood to drive up here.

“But I’m the boss, so I will not sleep on the floor.”

What would you give for the opportunity to get rid of him right now? But you were too tired to kill him, you just wanted to sleep.

“Fine, then we will share”, you bit out, ready to bite off his head.  

“Fine”, he shouted back, but if you weren't mistaken, his voice sounded a bit hoarse.

Far too late, you realize what you had agreed on. You wanted to curse, but you kept your mouth shut. It was far too late to back down. He would never let you live that down. So, you had no chance. Turning your back on him, you went to your bag and took off your sweater.

“What are you doing”, the panic in his voice brought a smile to your lips.

“Getting ready for bed, what else does it look like?”

Not wanting to give the poor boy a heart attack, you put on a shirt, before unclasping your bra. Behind you, you could hear Lockwood taking a sharp breath. But you couldn’t care less. Never would you put yourself through a painful night in a bra. Opening the button of your jeans was the last straw.

“I’m going to the bathroom”, rushing past you, Lockwood loudly slammed the door shut behind him. You couldn’t help but smile, maybe you had to share a bed, but you totally won this round.

When you left the bathroom, after brushing your teeth, your eyes almost popped out of your head when you saw your boss, who had already made himself comfortable on the bed.

“Where is your shirt?”

Was this his revenge for the bra? Would the entire night be psychological warfare? Not that you weren’t ready. You were ready since you stepped your first foot into Portland Row and realized, that your new boss was a jerk.

“I always sleep like this.”

Your eyes narrowed, not sure if that was a lie or the truth.

“Don’t come crying to me, if you’re too cold this night.” With these words, you slipped into bed next to him.

“I will not be cold”, he protested, and you doubted it. The room was fucking cold, you weren’t even sure if the heater was working. But you were too tired to argue with Lockwood about this, what didn’t mean, that you weren’t ready to tell him “I told you so”, when he would admit it.

“Touch me and I will kill you”, you threatened before turning off the light. Next to you, Lockwood let out a humorless laugh, which shacked the whole bed.

“Trust me, I have the same desire to touch you as I do to touch a ghost.”

“Great, we sorted that out“, you snapped back, unable to let him have the last word.

For a moment there was only silence, broken only by rustling as you both tried to find a comfortable sleeping position. Which was harder than it sounded like. The bed was way too small, and you would rather die than to cuddle with Anthony fucking Lockwood. His body was only inches away from yours, and you could feel the heat he was radiating.

“Stop hogging the blanket”, hissed Lockwood, and you couldn’t help but roll your eyes.

“Maybe you wouldn’t need it, if you would wear a shirt like a normal person”, you spew back.

“Fuck you!”

“Fuck me yourself, you coward”, you didn’t know what was coming over you. You didn't know what made you say those words, but in the future, you would blame it on being tired.

Lockwood didn't need to be told twice. Hungrily, his lips crashed against yours and with all your anger you kissed him back, while clawing your nails in his naked shoulder. This wasn’t how you had imagined your first kiss with Lockwood. You always thought it would be sweet and slow, not raw and angry.

“I hate you so much”, you whispered against his lips, and Lockwood let out a chuckle.

“Believe me, I hate you more.”

You woke up to the sunbeams dancing on your nose. It was much warmer, than the night before, maybe the heater, had started to work overnight. This thought vanished, when you realized, that the heat was coming from your pillow, or better speaking the body you used as pillow. Suppressing a scream, you hastily tried to get away, only to back up a little too far and therefore to fall out of the small bed. You came up with a hard thud that woke up Lockwood.

“Y/N?”, sleepily Lockwood looked over the edge of the bed, and you suddenly remembered what you had done last night. A blushed creeped up your face, while you thought about the kisses you shared. At least you stopped, before it escalated. You could never forgive yourself and your morals if you had slept with Anthony Lockwood, you hated this arrogant prick.

“Are you in such a hurry to get away from me?”, running his finger through his swoon worthy hair, he gave you one of those arrogant smiles you hated so much. Seeing this, you wanted to wrap your fingers around his neck and just squeeze. But you wouldn't give him the satisfaction of saying that you were throwing yourself at him. So, you just glared up at him.

“Yes, I want to get as far as possible away from you, and I think we'd be doing both of us a favor if we forgot what happened last night and never talked about it again.”

For a moment, Lockwood looked at you with an expression you couldn't quite put your finger on. It wasn't pure hate, at least not just.

“Last night was a mistake.”

Even if it was your idea to forget everything about last night, it hurt to hear him calling it a mistake. However, you would never give him the satisfaction of showing him that.

“At least we agree on one thing.”

The second time you and Lockwood shared a bed was nothing more than a mistake. It was shortly before Christmas, Lucy already left Portland Row to take a train to one of her sisters and George was already by his family. You had the choice between spending Christmas with your family or with Lockwood at Portland Row. It was like choosing between Scylla and Charybdis. But before you could make up your mind, Lockwood felt ill, and you weren’t the heartless bitch, he made you out to be. You didn’t want him to die, even if you often said it. But you needed this job and without Lockwood there wasn’t an agency. Therefore, you decided to stay and care about him, so he didn’t catch a pneumonia and died a painful dead, even if he deserved it.

It was all going as well as you could expect it. Lockwood was too ill to fight with you, and you only wished for his dead once or twice a day, so far less than normal. Everything was going well, till you started to fell sick. Of course, this idiot couldn’t keep his germs to himself.

You were shacking from the cold you couldn’t escape, as you went up to his room, to bring him his dinner. Normally you tried to do this as fast as possible, in and out, before he even had the chance to say anything to you. So, you didn’t have to see him longer than needed, and he didn’t have to see you longer than needed. Nothing had changed since the night you shared a bed and kisses. You still hated each other with burning passion. But this time as you stepped foot into enemy territory, aka Lockwood’s room, you realized that this was right now the warmest room in the whole house. Setting down the tray, you carefully took a seat on the only free space in his room, the edge of his bed. You wouldn’t stay long, you told yourself. Just long enough to drive the cold from your bones.

“You’re looking worse than usual, I didn’t know it was possible”, Lockwood’s annoying voice, broke your peace.

“Says the person who looks like a walking corpse”, you bite back.

“You got sick.”

“No, I’m fine.”

You didn't know who you were trying to convince with this lie. Anyone with eyes in their head could see that you weren't feeling well. However, Lockwood was too exhausted to argue with you. He just started to eat his dinner, while you closed your eyes to find the strength to stand up and leave this warm behind you.

The next time you opened your eyes, you weren’t sitting on the edge of Lockwood’s bed, you were lying in it. You weren’t sure, how it happened, but you were sure it was just an honest mistake, which could happen to everyone. Feeling too sick to panic, all you could just concentrate on was that you were finally warm. You managed to successfully ignore Lockwood's arm over your hip and his steady breathing on your neck. This was a problem you would deal with when you felt not like dying any minute. Closing your eyes for a second time, you drifted away.                 

The first thing you realized, when you woke up the next morning was, that Lockwood’s warm was missing. He had sneaked out of his own bed, while you were still sleeping. So, this was the perfect chance for you to sneak away to not have to face Lockwood after accidentally falling asleep in his bed. But you couldn’t muster the strength to move. You could just lay there and wait for your doom, aka that Lockwood returned.

It didn’t take long for him to come back. In his hands, he held the tray you used the last days to bring him food.

“I brought you breakfast”, giving you the tray, he got in the bed beside you. If someone had told you, that you would spend Christmas eating breakfast with Lockwood in his bed, you would have laughed and called the person delusional. But here you were. Neither of you had the energy to argue, so you both just ate in silence.

“You should try to get more rest”, Lockwood told you, after both of you finished eating, and he was right, not that you would ever say this out loud.

“You too, you still look like shit”, maybe he was a little bit fitter than you, but he was worlds away from being healthy.

“Fine”, he bit back, another sign, that he was everything but healthy. Normally he would have said something mean in response, but he just laid down beside you. For a moment, nobody said something. Then you shuffled a little bit in his direction, attracted by the warmth he radiated. He acknowledged this with raised eyebrows.

“I’m just cold, don't imagine anything about it.”

“I would never!”

The rest of the holidays you spent together in his bed. It was a surprise for both of you, that at the end, when you both felt better, no one had torn off the other’s head.

When Lucy and George came back and asked how your holidays were, you both just shrugged. What really happened was probably a secret that you both would take to your grave. You quickly found back in your everyday life of hating each other, and it was almost as if none of this had ever happened. But only almost.

The third time you had to share a bed with Lockwood would have been avoidable if Lucy had been a little bit more cooperative.

Lockwood and Co. had a new, very lucrative case. You were hired to secure a very dangerous source. The catch was, that the owner was one of those weirdos who was a little too enthusiastic about the occult. He was planning a two-day seance with an overnight stay at his manor, and your client had managed to get you an invitation. The only problem was that the invitation was for one guest and a plus-one. There was no question that Lockwood would go. But your team couldn't agree on who would accompany him. George wasn’t an option, that would bring too much attention. That only left you and Lucy.

“We all know that I’m a bad liar, nobody would believe me, that I’m Lockwood’s girlfriend”, Lucy stated. Normally you loved Lucy, she was your best friend. But right now, you could have punched her.

“As if anyone would think I was dating Lockwood”, you countered and directed to the asshole himself, you said: “I would never date someone like you.”

“And I would never date someone like you”, he fired back, and you didn’t have to look at Lucy and George to see them rolling their eyes, like always when Lockwood and you decided to argue.

“With the sexual tension between you, no one will doubt that you are dating”, Lucy butted in and could be glad, that looks didn’t kill otherwise she would be six feet under.

“There is no sexual tension, only hate”, you argued hotly.

You would never admit that there was maybe sexual tension, because if you would, you would think about it, you would think about the kisses in this one fatal night and that was a way, you didn’t want to go. Because if you would go down this path, there was no return to normal. Therefore, it was way easier to tell yourself and anybody else, that you hated Anthony J. Lockwood with burning passion.

“But Lucy is right, Y/N should join Lockwood”, George the little backstabber joined Lucy’s side. Knowing when a fight was lost, you ran your hand over your face.

“This can only go wrong.”

You should be right.  You weren’t even an hour at the manor, and you hated everything. The weirdos got on your nerves with their own stupidity. Lockwood's arm had been around your waist for almost 43 minutes, and you wanted nothing more than to rip it off and hit him with it to dead. Yeah, you were everything than happy. I didn’t help, that Lockwood had decided that fake girlfriend wasn’t fancy enough and had given you an engagement ring before he introduced you to everyone as his fiancée. You were dead and in hell, otherwise you couldn’t explain, how you landed in this situation. At least the ring was pretty.

“We should sneak away and look for the source”, you whispered, only loud enough for him barely to hear you. Slowly, Lockwood nodded to let you know that he heard you. Calculating, he let his gaze wander about the other people in the room, probably to find the best way to disappear unnoticed.

“We should kiss”, he said after a moment, and somehow managed to seem totally serious.

“What?”, you almost choked from sheer surprise.

“If we make out, no one will be surprised if we disappear, everyone will just think that we were looking for a quiet corner to have a little fun.”

Hearing this, you grimaced. But he wasn’t wrong. Nobody would think much about you sneaking off when you first put on a show. Without a verbal response, you grabbed Lockwood by his tie and pulled him down to your height. Hungrily, you caught his lips with yours. Lockwood didn’t waste any time and pulled your body against his. Eagerly his hands roamed over your body, and you had the feeling, that this meant a little bit more to both of you, than just a show for a case. Not that you would ever admit it.

When your lungs were screaming for air, you reluctantly broke the kiss.

“You’re actually a really good kisser”, Lockwood smiled down at you, and it felt like your stomach was riding a rollercoaster.

“You’re actually very average”, you lied like the liar you were. But the truth was, there was nothing you would like more than to kiss him again.

“Like, you have kissed so many guys to know what average is. Feel free to admit it, I’m a good kisser.”

Seeing his arrogant smile, you just rolled your eyes.

“Let’s go, so we didn’t kiss for nothing!”

Together you walked through the manor, till you found the library, your first guess for the location of the source. You just started to look around when you heard steps coming in your direction. Before you could find a good hiding space, the door opened and nobody else than the owner of the manor, the weirdo you wanted to steal from, was standing there.

“Miss, did you get lost? The library is not open for the guest”, he told you, and you tried your best innocent smile. But Lockwood appeared beside you before you could try to lie your way out of it.

“I’m so sorry, Sir. My fiancée and I were just trying to find a quiet room”, he gave the owner his best Lockwood smile, while his arms found again his way around your hip.

“Then I would suggest trying the bedroom assigned to you.”

Under his caution eyes, you and Lockwood walked out of the library.

“I saw the source”, Lockwood whispered in your ear, at the moment the door closed behind you.

“Did you take it?”

“No, didn’t have the chance, but we can do it tomorrow, right now we should return to our bedroom, or do you want to socialize a little bit more with the other guest?” Hell no!

“Let’s go.”

Of course, your bedroom had only one bed. At least it was big. You and Lockwood could both sleep in it without touching each other. Without saying much and more important without arguing, you both got ready for bed. Of course, Lockwood decided against wearing a shirt.

“I hope one night you will freeze to death”, you mumbled while slipping under the blanket.

“I’m too hot for this and considering how you always cuddle up to me at night, you know it too.”

Rarely, you were lost for words, but this was one of these moments.

“Keep dreaming, Lockwood”, you shot back, but both of you knew that this was a lame response. As a reaction, Lockwood just gave you a cocky grin.

“We'll see that tomorrow morning.”

“Yes, we will.”

You firmly resolved to keep a lot of distance from Lockwood and his tempting warmth that night.

But waking up the next morning, you realized that you could even break the best resolutions. Like this one. Lockwood was like a mobile heater, and that was too tempting for you when you were sleeping. This night was no difference. As you had been asleep, you had cuddled yourself in Lockwood’s side, and he had draped an arm around you, to pull you even further against him.

With a bright red face, you tried to free yourself from his hug. But your movement woke him up.

“Look like I was right, I’m hot, and you know it”, sleepy, he smiled up at you.

Torn back and forth, you closed and opened your mouth. You weren’t sure if you should kiss him or choke him till he died. You did neither.

“Or maybe you are just so touch starved that you can’t help but hold me in your sleep”, you countered.

“Maybe, but who could blame me?”

Too stunned to speak, you just stared at him. Was he flirting with you? Or were you just hallucinating? It must be the second. Maybe you were still dreaming.

“It feels really nice to hold you in my arms.”

“But aren’t we hating each other?”, a bit overwhelmed, you ran your hand through your hair. You were here to steal a source, not to talk abut feeling with Lockwood, you weren’t prepared for this.

“I never hated you, and I think you also don’t hate me.”

That was a bold statement, but maybe it was the truth. You weren’t sure what you felt for Lockwood. He had been an asshole to you from day one. And you hadn’t been better. Since the beginning, he had something that you just wanted to kiss or kill him. Because you were an insecure mess, you had decided to be mean to him rather than get hurt by him.

“But why were you such an asshole?”, you asked, curious.

“Because you let me something feel, I don’t like. In your presence, I feel so giddy and nervous, not like the agency head I should be.”

“We are such idiots. You are an idiot, but maybe I’m the biggest idiot of all. Seeing your face let me feel stronger emotions than I ever felt before, and I’m not sure if I want to kill or kiss you for it.”

“Then kiss me.”

He didn’t have to tell you twice. You kissed him like you always wanted to be kissed, like nothing in the world mattered to you beside him. And maybe this was true, the first thing you thought about was normally him and the last thing which crossed your mind before falling asleep was his dorky smile. You loved him, and you were an idiot, that it took you so long to realize it.  

The first time you wanted to share a bed with Lockwood was after you and him returned successfully from your mission. You stole the source without getting caught, and after you told Lucy and George how you did it, you were sitting in the living room. Lucy and George already went to bed and you both were peacefully silent. The only sound was the cracking of the logs in the fireplace, while Lockwood played softly with your hand in his. You were still wearing the ring he had given you. You had wanted to give it back to him, but he insisted that you keep it.

“Do you need a personal heater this night?”, Lockwood broke the silence, and you gave him a bashful smile.

“Maybe?”

“Are my eyes deceiving me or is that a smile, my love?”

“Oh, shut up.”

You were still laughing when Lockwood pulled you up from the sofa. Hand in hand, you walked up the stairs to his bedroom and for the first time in your life, you wanted to share a bed with him. So, this was what you did. Slipping under the blanked with him, you let him pull yourself in his arms. With your head laying on his naked chest and a happy smile, you slowly drifted away.      

#anthony lockwood #lockwood & co #lockwood & co fanfic #lockwood and co #anthony lockwood x reader #lockwood netflix #fanfic #lockwood x reader #anthony bloody lockwood

[queenimmadolla]

𝐌𝐀𝐆𝐈𝐂𝐀𝐋 𝐌𝐘𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐀

(eddie munson x secret admirer!reader)

𝐦𝐚𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭 • eddie edit © @fefemunson! • ao3

Summary: After four long years of pining, it’s high time you tell your crush you like him and quite possibly your last chance to, luckily there’s no better time for love confessions than Valentine’s Day. If only you hadn’t chosen to do so anonymously, because you’re pretty sure Eddie Munson is hoping his secret admirer is someone else.

Warnings: pining, angst, misunderstandings, very brief (blink and you miss it) descriptions of oncoming panic attack (doesn't happen), Heather Holloway being a sweetie, and a whole lot of fluff

authors note: no, you're not imagining things. i'm reposting a story i already have up. unfortunately, i seem to have an anti who has been flagging anything of mine that gains traction as content that it is not so it's hidden to those who don't have the settings on (most people) and goes to die away, never to be interacted with again. they're attempting to do the same to Magical Mysteria, as they had the original flagged and, therefore, hidden. because everyone seemed to really relate to reader and enjoyed reading this particular fic, i've decided to give that anti the finger, so here's a repost.

word count: 10k

You stood posted by a row of lockers, peaking around the corner of the hall to watch as the longtime object of your affections laughed at something one of his friends said.

“Are you stalking him again?”

You jumped, clutching your biology book to your chest as you swiveled around to face Heather, your best friend.

“Geez!” You hissed out, voice low as you checked to make sure you hadn’t attracted his attention.

But it’s you, so of course you hadn’t. Eddie was still leaning up against his locker and chatting away, face framed by the mane he called his hair. His curls were defined much more than usual—clearly he’d washed his hair before school which meant he must have been up early. Why did you know that????

“I’m not stalking him,” you grumbled and Heather giggled. “I’m just observing him.”

“Well, stop observing him and go talk to him.” She nudged your shoulder, giving you a reassuring smile. 

“I’m gonna—,” You answered with false bravado that soon wavered, “. . . eventually. Look, I have a plan. Okay, today is a new day, Valentine’s Day and the perfect day for romance. No more watching from the sidelines─”

Heather coughed out a stalking, followed by another cough, all of which you ignored.

“No more quietly pining, I’m telling him how I feel.”

Heather raised her eyebrows, tongue clicking. 

“Let me get this straight, you’re not only going to actually exchange words with him, you’re actually going to tell Eddie Munson about your feelings?”

Your heart fluttered just at the mention of him.

Edward Wayne Munson. Eddie.

You’d had a crush on him since your freshman year of high school, and contrary to your best friend’s earlier statement, you had exchanged words with him already. Sorta. Basically.

Freshman year you’d ate shit in the hallway, tripping over literally nothing and all your belongings had scattered, he’d stopped walking to help you pick your things up before he was off again. It wasn’t much conversation, but he did say something about those invisible rocks people left lying around.

Then your sophomore year, he’d sat behind you with his club at the school’s mandatory pep rally. One of his friends had accidentally jostled you and Heather a little too roughly when he was finding his seat and Eddie had apologized on his behalf.

Then last year he’d held the cafeteria door open for you and your friends when you slipped in. That time, you’d been the one to thank him and he had said you’re welcome. Almost unprompted!

So, yeah. Maybe you were a little delusional, it didn’t matter though. What mattered was you were running out of time. 

Somehow, Eddie had managed to fail the past two years, allowing you to catch up to him but that meant you were now a senior as well. You’d let the other chances to approach him pass you by because you were too scared of rejection, this was your last chance.

The college acceptance letter you’d received at the start of the week also spurred your bravery, if he rejected you, you only had a few months left until you were on your way to California, there’d be all those states between the two of you. 

You had nothing to lose, so today was gonna be the day.

“Yes,” you took a deep breath, slowly exhaling as the determination sank deep into your bones. “I’m gonna tell him.”

“How are you gonna do that?” She cocked her head, the curls of her side ponytail bouncing.

“I’m glad you asked, my friend.” You grabbed her hand, dragging her down the hall to your partially opened locker. You pulled the door open fully to reveal a bouquet of roses, set on top of your books.

Her face wrinkled up in confusion, “You bought yourself flowers again?”

“No.” You glared at her, a hand scratching your head as you hissed out through gritted teeth, “And we promised not to bring that up anymore—these are for Eddie.”

Heather perked up at that, a hand resting over her chest as she fawned, “Dude, that is so cute! When are you gonna give them to him?”

“That’s the thing, I’m not actually going to give them to him directly. I need your help. You’ve got history with him, yeah?”

You already knew she did so it didn’t surprise you when she nodded. You slipped one rose from the bouquet and handed it to her. 

“Can you leave this on his desk?” 

“Sure! Wow, I can’t believe I get to be part of your love story,” she marveled, twirling the stem between her fingertips.

God, you hoped it’d be a love story and not a tragedy.

“And these are for you.” You pulled out a smaller bouquet of pink roses, and Heather just about burst into tears.

The two of you had been best friends since middle school, and often spent your free time watching corny teen movies, usually living through the main characters of the romance ones. You’d had a couple of almost-boyfriends, in the end you hadn’t been interested in them enough to accept when they’d try to make it official. And Heather simply hadn’t caught the eye of anyone, which was ridiculous to you considering how pretty and nice she was, so you were usually her valentine on Valentine’s Day. This was the first time you actually got her flowers instead of a bunch of chocolates to eat the night away, you’d figured she deserved them. 

She’d had a crush on Steve Harrington, but he hadn’t noticed her and ended up dating and getting dumped by Nancy Wheeler. Then he’d dated every other girl except her. You feared your non-existent relationship with Eddie might go the same way.

“Dude,” Heather yanked you in for a hug, squeezing you to the point you thought your ribs might be bruised.

“Uhm. Heather. Ow.”

“Oh, sorry.” She released you, holding you by your shoulders, “Okay, so I just give it to him?”

“No, no, no, no, no. There will be no interactions. Just leave it on his desk.”

“Whatever you say, boss.”

You were about to reply when the first bell cut you off and threw you into a panic, nudging Heather in the direction of the classroom so she could beat Eddie there. Heather took off running once she realized the reason for your worry, only you both failed to remember Eddie was late to everything. 

You reluctantly made your way to your first period, plagued by thoughts of Eddie’s reaction to the first rose.

Would he like it? Oh, you hoped he liked it.

What if he thought it was some prank? What if he threw it away? Would he do the same to the rest?

Oh, well. There was no backing out now.

Your carefully thought out plan was put into action. You’d made sure to play sick the last 15 minutes of every class to get an excuse note to the nurse, only you didn’t go to the nurse. Instead, you ran around leaving a rose in Eddie’s various hang outs. One at the creepy old bench you knew he did business at. Two roses with the stems placed through the slits of his locker, three on his windshield wipers, one of the younger students in your art class was in Hellfire with him and after swearing him to secrecy, Will had promised to deliver three to Eddie personally, without revealing your identity.  

During lunch, you found yourself behind the stage of the cafeteria, in part of the drama department. It’s where Hellfire took place. 

You’d been there a handful of times, only when your curiosity for the metalhead got a little too overwhelming for you and you wanted to feel closer to him without having to face him. It was only ever set up on Fridays, the day Eddie got to school early enough to do so. 

You made your way over to sit in the chair closest to his throne, casting it a couple of nervous glances.

This would be where you left the last rose, so of course, everything about the set up, the throne had to look daunting to you now; a representation of how you were seeing Eddie as your confession grew nearer. If things didn’t go as planned, it’d be the last time you could come here.

The thought made your stomach hurt, a large void beginning to form there. 

The last rose was much too personal to leave just anywhere, where someone without a key to the room would find it. No one but the Hellfire club would occupy this area today. Attached to the rose with a ribbon was a note with a simple message that meant more to you than you cared to admit. You’d written it when you first came up with your plan at the start of the week and had been debating on whether or not to sign your name since then. 

The answer should’ve been obvious, right? This whole thing was to let Eddie know how you felt about him, and your romantic intentions were clear with the red roses. This note would finish implying the rest. And if you wanted Eddie to know it was you who admired him,  you just had to write your name.

Yeah, simple as that.

You clicked the pen in your grasp, placing it just over the paper. 

You wavered, licking your lips as you tried to convince yourself to just own your goddamn name. That’s all you had to do. Write on the paper.

Just write on the paper.

Your hand was beginning to shake, and with a heavy heart, you realized your name wouldn’t be going on this note.

You weren’t brave enough for that. You set your purple pen down, staring down at the words written in pink ink before you rolled the paper up, making sure the ribbon was secured (you’d used a hole puncher to slip the ribbon through) and left it on the seat of the throne before scurrying out of the room as fast as you could.

—

Eddie was at a loss, completely stupefied.

When he’d arrived at his history class, after having mentally prepared himself for the onslaught of boredom he’d face, he was surprised to find a single rose on his desk. By surprised, he meant incredibly suspicious. A glance around the room confirmed he wasn’t being watched, everyone was gossiping about Emmy Switcher’s upcoming party, so he’d settled into his seat and marveled at it.

Eddie wasn’t one to ever really get things on Valentine’s Day, not counting the mandatory valentine’s cards in elementary and middle school. The last time he’d gotten a card was his first senior year, and it had been a prank by a couple of girls on the softball team and their boyfriends. Embarrassed the shit out of him. The following Valentine’s Day he’d faked being sick to avoid falling victim again—god, he craved affection so much it made him pathetic enough to still hope for something gross and cheesy to happen to him. 

A rose was harmless though, right? Unless it was poisoned or something. Eddie lifted it to his nose, but all he could pick up was the seductive floral scent and when he didn’t immediately pass out from chloroform, he figured it was just a rose.

He glanced around again in vain, hoping someone would somehow stick out and when no one did, he held it in his grasp, rough fingertips stroking over the soft petals for the duration of the class.

He’d been stunned when he arrived at his locker to find two roses hanging out of it. A few people were staring at him as he carefully pulled them from their place, but they looked more curious rather than shy or mischievous. He had a feeling whoever was leaving the roses for him wasn’t around. 

He refused to leave them in his locker, the stems clutched in his hand as he went about his day and found more. Eddie was more than proud to display them, somewhat smug at the attention they were garnishing him.

Yeah, fuckers. Someone finally liked him. Eat shit.

He’d spent his English class convincing himself he’d never find out exactly who this someone was. He was pretty fucking stressed after that. He tried to come up with a roster of sorts, girls he thought might be interested in him enough to maybe leave him pretty flowers and woo him right out of his Reeboks.

He’d only been able to come up with four—impressive—but his first pick he was quick to scribble out. He hadn’t had a decent interaction with her and he figured it was creepy of him to put her at the top of the list all because of his wishful thinking. 

The second girl listed was possible, maybe. Chrissy Cunningham. He’d had a crush on her for as long as he could remember since she was always nice to him. She’d dumped Jason a couple of months ago and he’d been dealing to her for a short amount of time, but she seemed pretty flirty to him. Although, flattery did work on him.

The third name made him nervous, and not in a good way. Tina Sawyer. They’d both got pretty drunk at her Halloween party and hooked up in her bathroom but she avoided him like the plague afterwards, obviously embarrassed about interacting with him, which was typical for the lot of Hawkins.

He’d been sure it was a drunken mistake but sometimes, he’d catch her staring at him, and she didn’t look all that disgusted with him.

The last name on the short list was that of Tammy Thompson. She had made her interest in Eddie pretty clear his junior year, always trying to sit behind him in classes so she could play with his hair. Unfortunately Tammy was very, for the lack of better words, aggressive with her affections. He’d made out with her once and it had been sloppy and messy in the most unattractive of ways. It was like tonguing a dog.. Then he remembered she’d actually been able to graduate, unlike him, so he was spared. 

By lunch, Eddie was ready to try to figure out who his secret admirer was. Out of the two remaining girls on his list, he was leaning more towards Chrissy, who he felt wouldn’t be ashamed to hold his hand in public. 

He and his lunchbox full of drugs—and some snacks—made their way to the Hellfire lunch table where he spent a significant amount of time studying the two girls.

“Uh, are you okay, Eddie?”

Eddie glanced up at the concerned face of Will Byers, who’d arrived much later than the rest of the guys and Stephanie, one of the two girls in Hellfire. The question drew the attention of the rest of the table and Eddie internally sighed.

“Yeah, I’m fine—what are those?” Eddie asked, eyes honed in on the roses resting on Will’s tray.

The younger teen handed them over, “A girl told me to give you these.”

Eddie felt his heart skip a beat, “You know who she is?”

Will nodded and before Eddie could demand a name, he rushed, “I’ve been sworn to secrecy!”

Eddie scowled, carefully setting aside his roses so they wouldn’t be involved in his annoyance. 

“Byers, I’m gonna level with you. I’ve been in this miserable prison for six long years. While I’ve had my fair share of hookups, I have not ever had a girl like me enough to leave me roses and do cute shit before. And I fear I never will again. That’s why I’m actually gonna need you to tell me who it is so I can have a girlfriend by the end of what is supposed to be the most god awful romantic day of the year. ‘Kay?”

Eddie’s eyebrows dart up, face set in an intimidating glower but Will remembers how scared you looked when you trusted him with this task. He also knows, very well, how it feels to love someone without them ever knowing because you fear what their response will be. He’d also seen Eddie eyeing both Chrissy and Tina.

Will knew what it was like to have that special person interested in someone else, too. So, he’d protect your secret.

“I swore.”

Eddie groaned, head dipping forward in a brief moment of defeat before he slammed his fist on the table, making the other occupants jump. 

“Whatever, I’ll find her myself.” Just as Eddie stands, an idea occurs to him. Will said he wouldn’t tell him who it was, but the youngest Byers hadn’t said he wouldn’t tell him who it wasn’t, “Is it Tina?”

Will shakes his head, nose wrinkling. Nothing against her, she just wasn’t the nicest to him or his friends. Not the meanest, still.

Eddie breathes out a sigh, mumbling an oh, thank god as he makes his way to the cafeteria doors. That only left one possibility, and he was due to meet up with her in just five minutes. He couldn’t fight the grin off his face.

── 

Your heart was racing a mile a minute, having witnessed everything transpire at the Hellfire table.

You’d selected your lunch table four years ago because of the perfect view of Eddie it provided you, but right then it was killing you. You’d ruined your manicure, picking aggressively at the polish as you watched Will and Eddie, breathing out a sigh of relief when it looked like Will hadn’t revealed your identity.

Eddie hadn’t seemed too happy about that.

Then he stormed out and you fought very hard with yourself to not follow after him because then Heather would be right and you’d be a stalker.

“Regret it yet?” Heather asked after she’d swallowed a bite of her sandwich. 

“No.” You sorta lied. Yeah, you kind of regretted it but at the same time, knowing Eddie wouldn’t have to let you down gently made you less anxious. Besides, it wasn’t like you could just climb up the stage and duck past the curtain leading to the hellfire room without one of it’s members spotting you from their table. They’d tell Eddie in a heartbeat, especially if they found out the last rose and that damn note was there.

“Sure,” Heather drawled, glancing over her shoulder as you picked at your food, appetite suddenly gone. 

Maybe you really should have written your name on that love note. 

“Well, I hope you mean it, because Dream Girl is on her way to meet Ice Cream.” Your head snapped up at the mention of Chrissy Cunningham and Eddie’s code names you’d given them so both you and Heather were free to talk without either of them suspecting anything. You referred to Chrissy as Dream Girl because you’d known all about Eddie’s crush on her (while Heather had been depressed about Steve and Nancy, you’d eaten your weight in ice cream over Eddie and Chrissy’s more than friendly interactions with each other, which had nothing to do with Eddie’s code name—he was ‘ice cream’ because you wanted to lick him all over).

Sure enough, you looked over Heather’s shoulder, following her gaze to see Chrissy bidding her friends goodbye before she walked right out of the doors Eddie had pushed past minutes ago and as you watched her exit through the double doors, something inside you withers and dies a bit.

You knew Eddie sold to her (gave her a discount because she was pretty and because of their flirting, hearing him say that made you want to drive a knife right through your chest), you and Heather had followed them out a couple of times which is how you were both aware of the flirtationship.

After the first time you’d spied on them, the two of you had gone back to your home where Heather held a mock funeral for you. Now, you wished it had been a real one because you were sure Eddie had not only loved your roses, he also assumed they were from Chrissy. They would send him right into her arms at that shitty ass bench. And when he’d get a hold of the love note, well, you’d be the reason behind why Eddie and Chrissy would be hand in hand come Monday, canoodling by their lockers and kissing like no one else was watching. All the things Eddie should have been doing with you.

You should have signed your name on the fucking note.

─

Eddie had paced a pathway, disturbing the mounds of fallen leaves surrounding the picnic table. 

His stuff, another rose he’d found waiting for him included, was on the table and he’d taken off his jacket, despite the chill of the February air. He was working himself up in his head, overheating in the process.

“Eddie?”

His head shot around, grinning as Chrissy—who apparently left him roses—approached him, face broken out in a smile.

“Hey, Chris.” Eddie’s heart was racing a mile a minute, palms sweaty as he rested them over his hips, then quickly realized he looked stupid so he crossed them instead.

She laughed at his nerves with absolutely no malice and they sat down at the bench, getting down to business. She’d been about to hand him a twenty dollar bill after he slid her the ziploc bag of nugs, but he held up his hand.

“On the house.”

“Eddie, it’s always on the house. I feel bad.”

“Then stop.” He emphasized the demand with bulging eyes, smirking when she giggled. She had to like him, right?

Eddie tried to be discreet about it, plucking one of the roses from his growing pile. He played with the stem, even sniffed the petals again in hopes she’d comment about it, maybe look a little excited about it or just give him any sort of reaction to indicate it had been her.

Chrissy was too busy moving things aside in her backpack to make room for the baggy. When she finally did look back up, she smiled, but gave no hint she was even familiar with them.

“Ooh, pretty flowers. Where’d you get those?”

Was she playing coy?

“Uh, someone’s been leaving them for me all around school.” Was it you?

Chrissy’s face lit up and Eddie thought it was finally the moment of truth.

“That’s so sweet! Do you know who it is? Or is it like a secret admirer sort of deal?”

Evidently, not the moment of truth. She had to be toying with him, trying to prolong the reveal. Because if it wasn’t her, he was out of ideas. And he really, really didn’t want to be out of ideas. Not when there was someone out there, maybe thinking about him.

“I actually have no idea who it is,” he sighed out, hoping, if it was her, she’d just put him out of his damn misery already.

Chrissy glanced down at the table and Eddie perked up. Nerves? Was she finally gonna come out with it?

“It wasn’t me, Eddie…but, I wish it had been.”

Eddie didn’t know what to say, mouth dropped open a little as his eyebrows quirked up in surprise.

Okay. Hadn’t been expecting that. He was expecting a yes it was me or a no it wasn’t me but not Chrissy confirming it hadn’t been her while also telling him she liked him. 

“So, you haven’t been leaving them for me?”

Chrissy shook her head and reached across the table to place her smaller hand over his, palm warm against his skin. Eddie’s eyes squeezed shut as he groaned, head falling forward to rest against the table.

“Eddie?” Chrissy asked, concern lacing her voice.

He let out a very long sigh, a little miffed at how messy this whole thing had gotten. Now, there was his, Chrissy’s and someone else’s feelings in the mix. Christ.

“‘M’sorry, Chrissy.” Eddie sat up straight, face grim as he slowly pulled his hand out from underneath hers. “You’re great, fantastic, actually. You’re really nice and really pretty, but… I’ve been going crazy all day, trying to figure out who’s behind these.”

He gestures to the roses at his side, the sight of them filling him with an intense wave of longing.

“It’s been like years since I’ve gotten anything with real meaning behind it for any occasion—” he wasn’t counting the hellfire club or Wayne, referring to romantic intentions—“let alone Valentine’s Day, and someone in this school seems to be thinking about me.” 

Eddie thought about what it must have taken to do something like this, it may have seemed like a trivial thought, something simple to others. He knew it wasn’t. He had no idea who it was, but he put himself in their position. They had to know enough about him to know his schedule, where he spent time, and then make the time to leave them in those spots just before he got there. 

He’d spent the time waiting for Chrissy considering the anonymity of it. On the chance it wasn’t her, there was someone else in the school who was too afraid to approach him directly. He’d thought it might be out of fear of being seen with him, seen doing anything remotely romantic with him. Then, why even bother? They had to be afraid of his reaction, it’s what he would be nervous about if the positions were flipped.

And god, he’d never felt more alive before, more seen and all it took was a couple of roses. He felt like those fawning girls in John Hughes movies. 

“Before today, I never would have approached you about this, you know? I know we flirt, but I never would have been brave enough to cross that line.” He admitted, looking into her shiny blue eyes. Aw, man. Eddie hated making girls cry but it was true, he would have been waiting for her to make a move, or for Tina to make a move. Any of his past hookups, really. He’d have been with any of them—having craved affection and everything that came with it so bad—if they had just been the ones to initiate things on a more permanent basis. 

He would have. Past tense. They could all form a conga line and confess their undying love for him but, unless they were the one who left him the roses—the one who made him brave enough to actually go around confronting people in an attempt to seek her out—he’d let them down. 

“She made me brave, makes me feel really wanted and I don't even know who she is. It’s not you, it’s just─”

“I’m not her.” Chrissy finished for him, wiping under one of her eyes. “It’s alright, Eddie. I mean, I’m obviously a little sad, but it’s not your fault or hers. I do hope you find her, though. She’d be lucky to have you.”

She gave Eddie a sad smile, making him feel even guiltier but it’d be pretty shitty of him to try to be with her when he’d be thinking of someone else.

“Thanks, Chrissy.” Eddie stood up and gathered his things. It was clear she was upset and would probably need some time to gather herself, he didn’t want to force her to leave first or linger around and make it awkward.

He left her with a small, parting smile, relieved that he hadn’t charged her. Would have felt like a douchebag to make her pay for weed and turn her down in the span of five minutes when she’d been nothing but pleasant to him.

Eddie shook it off, determination setting in once more. Sure, he was back to the drawing board, but if all else failed, he could corner young Byers again until he finally gave him a name.

He’d come up with a pretty good list of ways he could force Will to give up the name by the time school let out and he got to the Hellfire room.

It wasn’t until he set his little bouquet and the lunchbox down (he didn’t bother with backpacks, just shoved whatever he needed in his pants pockets or the box), walking around the throne in a circle like some fucking animal because he was so restless, that he saw the rose.

The flash of white had caught his eyes and he dove down to grab it, trying to be as careful with pulling the piece of paper away from the stem of the rose, only he realized whoever left it had hole punched the thing together so he ripped the ribbon with his teeth rather than rip the note.

The ribbon was stuffed into his back pocket as he eagerly sat himself down, rose clutched in one hand and the note in his other.

Eddie,

Please excuse my lack of eloquence in this note and also in our real life encounters.

Eddie felt a shiver of excitement wash over his skin, cheeks a bright shade of pink at the confirmation he’d indeed interacted with his secret admirer before. Fuck, she’d talked to him! It made her feel even more real. 

She was a real person, someone he could probably hold hands with and kiss. Unless, this was done in a purely platonic way which would be a little fucked up. Red roses to be friends? C’mon. He read on.

I hoped you liked the flowers. I was actually debating on getting you different ones, something a little more personalized to you, but I ended up going with roses because, well, they convey romance better.

Eddie leaned over the arm of the throne, sagging back as he allowed himself to completely collapse with relief. Just for a few seconds, then his eyes were glued to the pink penmanship.

I’m trying really hard not to sound creepy because I’m totally not creepy and I know what you're thinking, ‘that’s what a creep would say’ but I swear I’m not, I just. I admire you. A lot. I have for so, so long. I admire the way you keep going, even when things are absolute shit for you, I like how you watch out for the underclassmen that come in and don’t really have anywhere to go. I like the way you dress, how pretty your hair is (even when it’s frizzy which is so unfair), how passionate you get with your rants (even though sometimes you’re an asshole about it). 

And I like your laugh I LOVE your laugh. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had what feels like the worst fucking day of my life and I’m ready to breakdown and cry and scream, but I don’t. Because I can hear you laugh your ass off at something one of your friends said in the cafeteria, by your locker or even when you’re just walking past me. And I wish I was there, laughing alongside you or making you laugh. I don’t know how your laughter makes me feel better, it just does. I get all smiley and I feel warm inside and I want to give you a hug for it, for making me feel better without even trying. 

But I can’t. You kind of scare me. Not in the mean, scary way, I’m just not sure you’ll like me. Or that it’ll go anywhere, or even if it should. 

You’re so confident, Eddie. And you’re stupid attractive (you are, and I’m sure you’re aware but I’ll go ahead and tell you I’m also physically attracted to you) and it’s so overwhelming that I can’t contain it anymore and I don’t really want to. We only have a couple of months before we’re out of here (I have a feeling this is gonna be your year, you’ll be free of this sentence, too), and I don’t want to have any regrets. The only way I’d ever regret you is by not telling you how I feel. 

So, here I am, Eddie Munson. Never thought I’d ever be confessing like this, but for the first time in my life, I feel brave. And it’s all because of you. Thank you, Eddie. I’ll be running around— dodging teachers and detention write ups— like Rocky in his training montages to get these roses to you because you deserve your flowers and I’d be delighted to give them to you today, and every single Valentine’s Day after. Actually, I want to give you even more than that. If you’ll have me.

Love,

What the fuck?

Eddie hastily searched the bottom portion of the back side of the paper, where the note ended for a signature, a name, initials, something but that’s where it ended.

 There was no name.

“NO! FUCK! NO! No, no, no, no, NO! I’ll have you, take me, just tell me who you are!” Eddie groaned out, note dropped into his lap so he could clench the roots of his hair with both fists as he doubled over.

This had to be a nightmare. It was the only reasonable explanation for someone to say all those wonderfuckingful things, just for them to disappear. 

His heart hurt and he blinked frantically to ward off the onslaught of water and sniffed to deter the tingle in his nose. 

The unmistakable sound of his own little rat pack making their way towards the room wasn’t enough to get him to pull himself together.

“Eddie, dude, are you okay?”

Eddie recalled his final option, head shooting to glance around at their faces in search of one in particular. 

“Byers. Where’s Byers?”

“His mom picked him up after lunch, wasn’t feeling good,” Mike informed him, completely unaware his grand Valentine’s gesture for Jane had been the cause of his sudden illness. 

It was the final straw for Eddie, he snatched the lunchbox and flowers and grumbled out, “Sessions canceled.”

He must have looked pissed as none of them protested, probably having something to do with most of them having dates afterwards. 

He almost made it out of the room when Gareth called him back, holding up a purple pen he’d found on the table and figured Eddie was about to forget.

“Is this yours?”

Eddie scoffed and rolled his eyes. 

“No.” Then he walked out.

Before promptly storming back in, swiping the pen out of Gareth’s meaty hands. Eddie clicked the pen and scribbled furiously over the side of his fist until the ink finally ran. It wasn’t purple. The ink filler was pink.

His secret admirer’s pen.

“What a cruel parting gift,” he sighed, shoving the pen in his pocket before making his exit. Again.

The really sad thing was Eddie couldn’t even sink into depression in the peace of his room. Emmy Switcher had approached Rick about wanting some herbal refreshments at her party and since he was still under house arrest (how Rick managed to deal and supply in his circumstances baffled him) the job fell upon Eddie. He’d driven to Rick’s restocked, then hit the party. 

It was a horn fest, couples everywhere he looked. All heart-eyed and attached at the tongue. It was disgusting.

Eddie was pouting, quietly fuming that it wasn’t him and his secret admirer making out or cuddling or doing something equally romantic but noooooo. Just had to take the ‘secret’ aspect to its extreme. 

He banished himself to a dark corner, only interacting with people when approached for drugs or weed. He’d caught sight of Chrissy and it had looked like she wanted to come over but he’d purposely shifted his gaze. Despite the gaping hole left where his heart was, it wasn’t Chrissy or Tina, or the girl in the upstairs restroom, who’d thrown herself at him when he’d been searching for a free bathroom to piss in, that he wanted. Eddie wasn’t in the mood to rebound.

Which was kind of crazy considering he hadn’t even been in a relationship, hadn’t been dumped. He wanted everything in that note, especially the promise of more and only with its author. 

Now, Eddie hadn’t been in love before. Some serious lust and want, yeah, however, reading that note made him feel like he was falling a little bit in love and he wanted, very badly, to dive headfirst the rest of the way. Clearly, that wasn’t going to happen.

Once he’d sold out the rest of Rick’s inventory, he stole a beer and headed for the front door. 

Once outside, Eddie took a minute to breathe. He hadn’t realized how stuffy it had been in there until he was no longer engulfed by the claustrophobic displays of affection. 

He trudged down the pathway and paused when he saw the figure of a girl sitting on the lawn. Her head was directed down towards the ground and she was most definitely not wearing the right clothes for the outside weather.

Eddie cursed under his breath, plans to immediately drive home and get crossed put on hold as he walked over, noting the dew already coating the grass.

“Hey, you okay?”

─

Drinking your sorrows away probably wasn’t the best idea, considering how much of a lightweight you were. 

Originally, you’d wanted to lock yourself away in your room for the night—and probably the rest of the weekend as well as maybe the next school week; nothing wrong with playing sick to avoid facing reality and your problems─to cry and pass out. Heather, on the other hand, had plans for you. She’d dolled you up, having to force you to wash your face and re-do your makeup once when you had started crying—put you in a cute outfit and dragged you to Emmy Switcher’s party. 

You knew her intentions were pure—as pure as underage drinking could be—but she knew her mistake when the party started to couple up. You’d been approached multiple times and she’d try to encourage you to go for the decent acting ones, you just hadn’t wanted to. When Chrissy Cunningham showed up, you’d gone for shots of the hard liquor (over the sink of course in case you gagged it up, which you did a decent amount of), sure that Eddie would soon follow and you’d be forced to witness their affection.

Obviously, you ended up shitfaced and somehow lost track of Heather. Or maybe she lost track of you. You’d very briefly attempted to find her, accidentally spotted Chrissy, now making eyes at Eddie who’d shown up, and you’d promptly headed outside, eager for some fresh air and an escape from the madhouse. The high alcohol level in your blood kept you from feeling how chilly it really was and you settled into the grass, twirling strands of it around your fingers.

You weren’t sure how long you were out there when someone approached you.

“Hey, you okay?”

You looked up, ready to ask them to just leave you when you locked eyes with Eddie Munson. Most of the liquid courage coursing through your veins evaporated, you couldn’t look at him for long, gaze moving back to the grass. What a way to start sobering up.

“I’m fine.”

“You sure? ‘Cause,” Eddie sat down next to you, one leg crossed and his other, knee up with his arm resting over it. His unopened beer was at his side, “You’re outside, alone, in the cold and you look pretty fucking sad.”

You scoffed, fingers still playing with the strands of grass as you tried to think of something to say that wouldn’t make you seem pathetic. In that time, Eddie took you in.

He knew you, he’d seen you around school and you were nice enough to greet him. Pleasantries in passing. Pretty Hallway Girl, as you’d been dubbed—though never referred to as—until he knew your name. It had been the first one he had jotted down on his list for his secret admirer’s identity, of course he realized with your lack of interactions, it wasn’t likely. He entertained the idea of dating you often, you’d just never shown any real interest in him. Eddie thought about it a lot. Anytime he caught sight of you, really. Your pretty face didn’t make it easy for him to stop. He was a really, really big sucker for your eyes and that smile you’d give him during those brief interactions; like the two of you had some sort of secret between each other. Warmed him up inside.

And here you were, all sad at a party. He didn’t really mind not getting crossed if it meant he got to comfort you, keep you company.

“I’m just drunk,” you finally blurted out, unable to come up with anything else, “And bummed.” 

Try devastated.

“You look it,” he joked, nudging his shoulder against yours.

“You don’t look that much better.” You shot back.

“That’s fair,” he sighed, breath visible in the night air as he tilted his head back. “I’m pretty bummed, myself.”

You really didn’t want to ask, figuring he’d already had some sort of lover’s quarrel with Chrissy and you didn’t want to get in the middle of it. 

But you were an idiot, so you asked, “Why are you bummed?”

You watched him dig around the pockets of his leather jacket, pulling out a lighter and a pack of cigarettes. He pulled one out of the pack, clenching it in between his teeth as he shoved the pack back into the pocket before he shrugged off the jacket entirely—denim vest included—putting it around your shoulders.

It caught you off guard but you were grateful, your body having decided to become once more susceptible to the chill of the air and dewy grass. Eddie must have been a freaking space heater because the lining inside was blissfully warm.

“Thank you,” you mumbled, shimmying around in it until you could slip your arms into the long sleeves of it, your fingers barely poking past the hem.

“You’re welcome,” he shrugged, flicking the lighter to life as he lit the cigarette. After he’d taken a drag, he answered you. 

“Love,” Eddie blew out along with a wispy plume of smoke, “Didn’t expect it to be so complicated.”

You wanted to mime the action of staking yourself in the heart. Of course he was in love with her. She was wonderful! And on top of that, he thought she’d been the one leaving him roses! Had he read the note? Assumed it was her, too? DUH! You were definitely playing sick next week.

“Yeah, well. Join the club,” you grumbled, hugging his jacket around you. It was as close as you were ever gonna get to actually hugging him. 

Eddie raised an eyebrow, hoping to school his disappointment. While he wasn’t looking for anyone else tonight, it was still displeasing to hear you were taken but of course you were. He couldn’t imagine you dating sporadically, you seemed much too wonderful for someone to even consider giving you up. No, he was gonna hurt himself with ideas involving you and a high school sweetheart stemming back to your freshman days, probably.

“Ah, I see. Is he here?”

You froze for a moment, “Uhm, yeah. He is.”

“Then why come? Or did it happen in there?” He jabbed a thumb behind him, gesturing to the party inside.

“No, it didn’t happen tonight, it was earlier. In the day. I didn’t really want to come but my best friend dragged me out here. I thought I was doing good, apparently not ‘cause here I am. I’m mostly bummed because of myself, though. I didn’t follow through on something I sort of promised myself and I messed everything up. For me. Not for him. I think he’s pretty happy, so I don’t want to ruin that. He deserves to be happy.”

Eddie could tell you meant it, you were vague as hell but whatever you’d done, however it ended, you genuinely seemed to want your boyfriend (ex-boyfriend?) to be happy. He hoped it wasn’t something you had to cave into for one of those meatheads. You deserved better than those jerks.

“That’s pretty selfless of you if you ask me,” Eddie raised the cigarette to his lips, admiring you.

“Eh, I guess. I fully plan on punishing myself for it, though. Really make sure to rub the salt in there, you know?” You finally turned to grin at him, despite the sinking feeling in your stomach.

Eddie thought about how he couldn’t just stop going to school so he could avoid having to look at all the faces in the crowds and wonder if his admirer is one of them.

“Oh, sweetheart, I’m right there with you.”

Sweetheart. He really was trying to kill you.

“Eddie, get your ass in there and make up with her.” You lightly slapped his arm and jabbed your finger in the direction of the house. You were not about to let your sacrifice be in vain and he’d better stop unknowingly torturing you like this.

“I can’t!” He laughed, amused with your sudden bossy attitude.

“Why not?” You whined, eager to just get him away from you. It wasn’t fair, he wasn’t being fair.

“Because I have no idea who she is.”

Once again you froze, eyes widening. Luckily for you, Eddie didn’t look too much into your reaction. He figured most people would be surprised over him nursing a heartbreak from someone he didn’t quite actually know, or was aware that he knew.

“What?” You asked, trying to seem as uninterested as possible as you played with the ends of his jacket sleeves.

“Fuck it. Someone left me roses all around the school and this really amazing love note.” For a moment, Eddie entertained the idea of trying to convey exactly what it meant to him, then he thought better of it. He’d either seem crazy, desperate or like some pathetic guy in love (which, he kind of was on the cusp of), “Pretty sure it was a girl.”

Not a single dude in the high school was romantic enough to pull it off, maybe leave him an entire bouquet, but not expand upon it like she had.

Eddie licked his lips, raising the cigarette to them once more and ready to admit that he had no fucking clue who she was, but he figured he might as well make one last rally.

“Wouldn’t happen to be you, would it?”

“Not me,” you lied flawlessly, with a gentle shake of your head. “Sorry, Eddie.”

Sorry I’m a big liar because HOLY FUCKING SHIT, wasn’t expecting that. 

“I figured. Still had to try, your boyfriend probably would have kicked my ass, though.” Yeah, Eddie hated Valentine’s Day.

He stubbed the cigarette out into the wet grass, and laid the rest of the way down, hands covering his eyes as the back of his head met the ground.

You frowned down at him. 

“I don’t have a boyfriend.”

Hello. 

Eddie peaked at you through his fingers, “No?”

You shook your head and as Eddie moved to push himself back up, he yelped.

He shifted onto his side, digging around his pocket for whatever it was that stabbed him.

“Ouch,” He hissed, yanking the purple pen out. “Damn, that hurt like a bitch.” 

Your eyes squinted at it in suspicion.

“Is that my pen?”

“Huh?”

“My favorite—and pricey—pen. I lost it at school today.” In fact, you were sure you had and you were sure that was your pen. You’d broken off the clip of it by accident and you recognized the large crack in the body of it, having once given into an intrusive thought regarding whether or not you had the strength to break it while you were bored in class. You did have the strength and luckily for you, it still worked. 

When Eddie made no move to give your pen back, you figured he didn’t believe you so you added, “The ink is pink, right?”

Eddie continued to stare at you, mouth slightly parted in awe, and you suddenly felt very nervous, glancing behind you to see if there was something that caught his attention but all you could see were the empty lawns.

“What?” 

He finally blinked, licking his lips again. 

“You’re a really good liar.”

“What?” You repeated, this time your question was laced more so with confusion than panic. He was right, but why was he saying that?

His lips slowly parted up at the corners until he was grinning at you so wide, his dimples were showing and you could feel your heart beating wildly against your rib cage, as if it was trying to break free to fly right over to him.

“This is your pen?”

“Yes!” Is that what his happiness was about? That he was holding your prized pen hostage?

“This is your pen?” You could tell he was having fun at your expense now, getting more giddy by the minute.

“Yes!” You laughed out, his joy contagious even if he was teasing you with your own belongings. “That is my pen. Give me my pen!”

He clicked it closed with his thumb, “I found it where we hold Hellfire sessions, same pen that was used to write my love note.”

And just like that, your heartbeat seemed to stop all together, smile dropping instantly as you wished a giant hole could form in the ground below you and swallow you up.

“That’s not my pen,” you denied, shrugging off his jacket as you quickly rose to your feet. “I gotta go, bye, Eddie.”

When you saw him starting to hastily rise, you bolted, literally running back into the house to try to find Heather and get the hell out of there.

You heard Eddie frantically calling your name but you didn’t stop, forcing your way through the bodies as you desperately searched for your best friend.

Luck was finally on your side because you were soon smashed into her back by a passing group.

“Whoa,” she laughed, turning to steady you, “There you are, I’ve been searching for you everywh—hey, what’s wrong?”

You were sure she must have noticed the panic on your face, eyes shiny with tears you refused to let fall in public. 

“I wanna go home, we have to leave.” You grabbed her hand, pulling her into a secluded corner as your head darted in the direction of the front door. You wanted to make a run for it but you feared running into Eddie on the way.

“What happened?” Heather asked, voice initially soft before hardening as her protective nature came out, “Did someone do something?” 

You shook your head, chest heaving with your breaths. You were so close to having a panic attack. 

“Eddie. He knows. He knows, Heather.” And because she was your best friend, she understood, mouth and eyes going wide.

“Holy crap. Wait—isn’t this what you wanted?” 

“No—yes—I don’t know! I can’t face him!” There was a reason you hadn’t written your name down on the note, regardless of how badly you wanted to. You were just scared.

“Why not?” She bent down, leaned in closer to hear you. This girl and her twenty questions.

“It doesn’t matter, he didn’t want it to be me, anyways. He would’ve asked earlier, and he only did it now because of that stupid pen!” You should have kept your mouth shut and just gone to buy another over the weekend, “Can we just please get out of here? We can try the side gate in the backyard.”

“Is Eddie looking for you?”

“Yes, that’s why we have to leave!” Whatever Eddie had to say, you didn’t want to hear it. Yeah, maybe he could want you but if he didn’t, was searching for you to let you down gently you’d be heartbroken. 

“He knows and you don’t think he wanted it to be you?”

“Yes!”

“Then why would he be looking for you?”

You refused to answer her, pushing her towards the back door instead. She went willingly for a few steps, then Heather stopped and you bumped into her back again as she craned her neck to look over her shoulder. 

“I think it's too late for that.” She pointed at something behind you and you followed her finger. 

Eddie was standing on top of the kitchen table a bunch of guys had carried into the living room to play beer pong on, eyes searching the room with his lips set in a frown.

He was attracting attention, a multitude of heads turning to peer up at him in curiosity.

Oh, god. He was looking for you, you were probably going to get rejected at a fucking Valentine’s Day party in some stranger’s living room.

Eddie must have caught the attention of someone near the sound system because the volume of the music was lowered and you could hear everyone muttering amongst themselves, asking what had happened to the music before they noticed Eddie.

He glanced around, not even a little nervous at the amount of people staring at him. He hadn’t planned on making a huge show of it, figured they were all too drunk to pay him any attention, luckily he was used to being a spectacle. 

Eddie used it to his advantage, calling out your full name.

The crowd muttered, everyone looking at each other in confusion or maybe trying to catch sight of you. 

It wasn’t long before someone recognized you, head turning in your direction, followed by many more—a domino effect—until just about everyone was staring at you, including Eddie.

He hopped off the table and made his way towards you, crowd parting to allow him. Heather slipped her hand into yours at your side, giving you a reassuring squeeze before she too stepped away, leaving you to finally face Eddie.

Eddie didn’t look at anyone else, gaze trained solely on you.

“Hi, again.”

You blinked, unable to keep yourself from glancing at the crowd around you, curious—nosey—to see what would happen next.

Guess you were going to have to finally face reality, no more running. You didn’t think you could break through the crowd, anyways.

“Hi,” you whispered but you knew Eddie had heard you, his lips pursed into a smile, eyes lighting up when you didn’t shut down.

“You ran away before I could tell you how I feel.” Eddie took another step, pretty much invading your personal space but he was desperate to be close to you and maybe body block you in case you tried to flee. He didn’t want you to run away again, to disappear like he feared you had when you hadn’t left your name on the note.

“It’s only fair, right? Since I know?”

You nodded again, the drum of your heartbeat loud in your ears. You were surprised you could hear Eddie over it.

Eddie stared down at you, lips pressed into a thin line, but he didn’t look upset or frustrated. It looked like he was thinking about something.

Little did you know he was reciting the note in his head to give him some courage, he’d memorized it.

He didn’t leave you waiting for long. 

“I admire you. A lot.” Your breath hitched as the words you’d jotted down were repeated to you, “So much that I want to stand on expensive looking, antique tables and crash parties for you. I like the way you get animated when you talk, the way you give into your intrusive thoughts at the most random of times—yeah, I saw you trying to see if your finger fit in the pencil sharpener in the library once—I like how kind you are, even when people don’t deserve it. 

“I like how you’ve never made me feel ostracized, never made anybody feel like that and I like how dramatic you are—storming off, making an exit, falling flat on your face in hallways then staying there like a dead body before you decide to reanimate again once you’re done being embarrassed. I like how you beat up your locker when it won’t open and then you give it a couple of pats to apologize once it finally does.”

Eddie chuckled at those particular memories, having been thoroughly amused when watching you and you feel your face get hot at being the cause of his cute laugh.

“And I really like your face, your pretty eyes, all of this,” Eddie gestured to you, to all of you from head to toe, “… you’re beautiful. Although, I gotta say, you drove me really fucking crazy today. Made me feel emotions I didn’t know I was capable of feeling and you scared the shit out of me when I thought I’d never get to know who the person I’m pretty sure I’m falling in love with is.”

Okay, maybe you didn’t want the ground to swallow you whole.

“I know we only have a couple of months left of school and you’re probably going off to continue being amazing at some college in some big city a million miles away—‘cause that’s my luck—but I’m willing to work with that. I want to drive those million miles to give you flowers and hold your hand, kiss you, listen to you complain about your bad days, hear you brag about your good ones, kill all the bugs you’re afraid of—even though some of them freak me out, you make me feel brave, too—and just be all around disgustingly domestic with you. 

“And yes, that includes all the not so fun domestic stuff like fights—which we’ll get over, I’ll do just about anything, even cave first, if you give me those big, coy eyes of yours—and taxes. I want to do it all with you. If you’ll have me.” Eddie ended, eyes wide and just a little out of breath. 

There it was. He’d thrown it all out there, everything he wanted to offer (because he wanted to give you everything, even though it kind of terrified him).

And you—you were just staring at him, left to gape at him since you’d expected… well, you hadn’t really known what to expect since you usually ran from the consequences—be they good or bad—of your actions. 

He wanted to be with you. Holy crap, Eddie Munson wanted to be your boyfriend. Wanted to do boyfriend things like visit you at college and hold your hand. You’d thought, the whole time, it had just been you observing him. You never thought he’d be observing you, too. It all sounded too good to be true, you couldn’t really think, couldn’t really form words.

You didn’t have to, Eddie grew anxious, maybe even a little impatient despite having decided the moment you’d run away from him in the front yard that he’d chase after you for as long as it took him to get you to give him a chance.

He found himself blurting out his strongest desire, “Can I kiss you?”

This was it, you were faced with another opportunity, and this one was the actual last opportunity you had to tell him how you feel, without any anonymity. No more hiding, no more running.

“Yeah,” you breathed out and he was on you before you’d even finished saying that singular word, his surprisingly soft lips pressing desperately against yours as his hands moved to frame your face, one of his thumbs stroking along your cheek.

Your eyelids fluttered shut as you returned the kiss and just like that, what he intended to be a simple but firm kiss, turned into your lips moving against each other, a little wet and enough to have Eddie want to pop his leg up like in the fucking movies.

The only reason he kept himself from introducing his tongue to yours like he so badly wanted to was the sounds of encouragement around him; cheering and hollering. You broke away, having also heard your peers whooping and wolf whistling, to hide your face in his chest, bashfulness returning full force.

Eddie laughed and kissed the top of your head, unable to contain his grin and joy. He definitely wasn’t used to this, more accustomed to jeering, not cheering. A couple of people even clapped him on the shoulder.

“You know what, I think they’re rooting for us, sweetheart.”

You pulled away just enough to look up at him, offering a small, pleased smile of your own.

“They’re not the only ones.”

Well, he had to give you some tongue for that one. The cheering and sounds of excitement got louder as he did.

—  You hadn’t walked into school hand in hand with Eddie when Monday came around—though you’d spent pretty much the entire weekend with him, driving around town, lounging around your room (he’d come in through your window) and making out—he hadn’t mentioned anything about meeting up in the parking lot and you weren’t offended in the slightest. While you wanted to see him, you appreciated the extra time to calm your excited nerves before you did. 

Heather ran up to you the second you made it to your locker, grin stretching from ear to ear. 

“I still can’t believe it. It didn’t even happen to me and I’m pinching myself because of how romantic it was!”

“Imagine how I feel,” You were all smiles as you turned the combination for your locker. But of course, since it was openly known as one of, if not, the shittiest of lockers in the school—having belonged to several wrestlers and football players before you, who’d evidently cared for it on the rough side—it didn't budge when you tugged at it.

You wouldn’t miss it when you graduated. 

With a sigh, you pulled the straps of your backpack off of your shoulders and handed it to Heather. Then, you yanked aggressively at the small locker handle. It was your routine though, so you knew it wouldn’t open then, either. It was only when you slammed your fist against it, after all the yanking, that it opened.

Roses immediately flooded out of it, piling onto the ground at your feet. You and Heather watched with open mouths, glancing at passersby, who also looked on in surprise, until your stuffed locker finally finished its floral avalanche.

“Like ‘em?”

You jumped up, and then internally scolded yourself for almost trampling a couple of your flowers. You carefully twisted around to face Eddie, who was leaning back against the row of lockers behind you, smug smirk on his handsome face.

“Yeah, what are all of these for?” You asked, still marveling at them as he pushed himself off the lockers to wrap his arms around your middle and press a kiss to the side of your head.

“I realized I never got to ask you to be my Valentine or give you flowers. So, I bought some Saturday morning,” They were on sale so he’d gone purposely overboard, “used my uncle’s collection of mugs as vases to keep them alive, then woke up at the asscrack of dawn this morning to get here before you did. I probably broke your locker even more, by the way. So, be my Valentine?”

“I’m pretty sure it was part of the terms and agreements of our relationship, but yes. I’ll be your Valentine.”

Eddie closed your locker for you, pressing his weight against it to make sure it was secure and no more roses would escape before he scooped up the ones that had fallen out, arranging them into a large bouquet which he handed to you, leaning in to give you a kiss.

You hummed happily against his lips, nose wrinkling in glee when you felt him smile.

Eddie let out a content sigh when you parted before glancing to his side at your gawking best friend.

“Hey, Heather.” Eddie wasn’t at all bothered by the audience. “Nice shoes.”

“Thanks! They’re new. You done sucking face?”

“For now,” he promised, then turned his attention back to you. “I’ll see you later, beautiful. I’ve got a test to barely pass. Gotta make sure I walk that stage with you.”

Eddie pinched your cheek, pressed another kiss to your forehead and rushed off down the hall. You’d barely locked eyes with Heather when Eddie came running back, taking your face in his hands as he muttered something about one more and gave you a kiss that had you a little shaky on your feet.

‘One more’ actually turned out to mean a couple more pecks before he really forced himself away, blowing you a kiss just as he disappeared around the corner.

“He’s whipped,” Heather stated.

“Pretty sure I’m falling in love with him.”

“That’s appropriate.” You both nodded before you turned to face your closed locker, arms full of sweet smelling roses. 

“. . .  You still need to get your books, don’t you?”

“Yeah.”

Heather slid her arms through the straps of your backpack, over her front, so she could hold your flowers for you as you prepared to battle your locker again. It was totally worth it.

─

Eddie never ended up giving you your pen back, it’s the one he used to write love letters to you while you were away at college.  

#eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie munson x fem!reader #eddie munson x secret admirer!reader #eddie munson x y/n #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x black!reader #eddie munson fluff #eddie munson angst #eddie munson blurb #eddie munson imagine #eddie munson oneshot #eddie munson fanfic #eddie munson fic #eddie munson x reader fluff #eddie munson x reader angst #stranger things #stranger things 4 #stranger things vol 1 #stranger things vol 2 #joseph quinn x reader #joe quinn x reader #queenimmadolla #masterlist

[moonstruckme]

I sent a request a while back before I knew about you closing your request. (Sorry about that.) But maybe apocalypse Remus and reader finally reuniting with the others? Or dealing with the full moon approach while separated from the pack and all the reader wants to do is help, but Remus doesn't want to hurt her? Or maybe they get attacked again, and they get away just fine, but the reader gets hurt in the process or something. Idk something angsty just sounds so good rn 😅

Thank you for requesting love, sorry for the wait!

cw: blood

apocalypse au

Remus Lupin x fem!reader ♡ 1.2k words

You’re off gathering more twigs to feed the fire when you hear a series of explosions. Your head snaps in that direction, time seeming to stop with your heart. In the next second you’re dropping the kindling, sprinting back for the campsite, because if someone’s found Remus, if they’ve gotten through his protections—

You only make it a few steps before you see he’s already racing toward you, barely glancing behind him to shoot a nonverbal spell at the three—no, four, five—bounty hunters chasing after him. You scramble for your wand to help, knocking a couple off his heels before Remus barrels into you. He apparates without hesitating, and a scream tears from your throat, pain searing through your side. 

You and Remus grip each other tightly, rolling to the ground. The place where you’ve landed is, but you can hardly tell with the desperate ringing in your ears and the sound of your own panting breaths. Remus rolls off you, inadvertently putting pressure on the blazing pain in your side. You cry out and put your hands over the spot, shielding it from further harm.  

“Fuck.” He’s panting too, shoving his wand in the waistband of his jeans with shaking hands. “Sorry, I didn’t have time to warn you, I—are you hurt?” 

Your brain is all static, speech beyond you, but in a breath there are hands covering yours, pulling at the edge of your shirt. Your shirt, sticky with blood. You moan. 

“You have to let me see,” Remus is saying, fighting to get your hands away from the wound. “I can’t help if I can’t see it.” 

Your shirt sticks and clings to you as he peels it off, the cool air somehow making everything worse. Remus curses proficiently. His touch vanishes. It’s a relief, and also not. You want to go curl up somewhere by yourself until this hurt goes away, and also you don’t want him to leave you. 

He’s back a second later, taking your wrists in a gentle but firm grip to get them away from your side. You hadn’t realized you’d grabbed it again. 

“You’re okay,” he promises swiftly, and you must really trust him, because you almost believe him despite the leaves growing slick with blood beneath you. “You’re going to be fine. Sorry, this is going to sting.” 

You don’t quite process the words before fire sears your side. You choke on a sob, but the pain only spreads, moving inward like it’s eating you away to nothing. Remus shushes you, tiny, helpless placations rushing from between his lips. 

“You’re okay, sweetheart. You’re okay. I’ve got you. Almost done now.” 

When the burning ebbs, you’re honestly not sure whether this new feeling is only the lesser pain you’d felt before whatever Remus had done to you. But a few ticks go by, and the static in your head fades. You can hear yourself breathing. The breeze rustling through trees. You touch your side tentatively, and it’s whole. 

Remus’ scarred hand skims it as though making sure of the same thing. You look at him, tears still clumped in your lashes, and he retracts his hand, glancing down to screw the cap back on the bottle. 

“What is that?” Your voice scrapes on its way out. You clear your throat embarrassedly. 

Remus looks over like he isn’t sure you’re talking to him. “This?” You nod. “Essence of dittany. There’s some powdered silver in it, but that doesn’t tamper with the healing.” 

You nod again, swallowing. Neither of you feel the need to discuss why he has the potion so readily available. Remus turns away from you, burying it back in his bag. You realize for the first time that he even has it, must have managed to grab it before the bounty hunters go too close. You’re both lucky he’s so quick on his feet.

“Thank you,” you say, sitting up, “and, uh, sorry for…making it so difficult.” 

Remus softens. He kneels beside you again, holding a different bottle in his lap as he draws a careful finger under your lashes, catching the tears hanging there. “I’m sorry for splinching you. I should have warned you we were going to apparate.” 

“You were under duress. I think you can be excused some hasty decision-making.” 

“You splinched away nearly half your middle,” he says, a bit of teasing in his voice. “I think you can be excused a bit of hysteria.” You can’t tear your gaze away from his amber eyes, and he doesn’t shy from it. “You came close to losing a few ribs. I don’t know what we would’ve done then.” 

“You would’ve fixed it,” you say certainly, and Remus drops his stare, a bashful smile lifting one corner of his mouth as he unscrews the bottle he’d pulled out of the pack. 

“Maybe,” he allows. “Here, have a few sips of this.” 

You sniff at it tentatively. 

“Don’t smell, just drink.” 

You do. Then you gag, coughing. “Ugh, what is it?” 

“Blood-Replenishing Potion. Have just a little bit more,” he instructs, watching while you do before taking the bottle back and twisting on the cap. “You really scared me, bleeding all over the place like that.” 

“Sorry.” 

He hums as he stores the bottle back in the bag, eyes going somewhere foggy and faraway. It may be the new familiarity of this particular look, but you know instantly what he’s thinking of: the other people he’s terrified for, who might not be faring so well without his help and ample medical supplies. 

“How do you think they’ve managed to find us twice in under a week?” he asks, quiet enough that you wonder if he’s even talking to you. 

“They didn’t.” You match his tone, soft and careful. “Those were bounty hunters, not death eaters.” 

Remus grunts. “Same thing, under this government.” 

“Those guys found us by chance,” you say with certainty you don’t feel. “James and Sirius have always had better luck than that. And they’re smart. If anyone stumbled upon them, they’d get away, too.” 

His throat bobs, but he nods. “You’re right. They’re perfectly competent on their own, I just…I don’t like the idea of them out there without us to help.” 

“Me neither,” you admit at a murmur. 

Remus only looks into the leaves, gaze still distant. You give him the time he needs to collect himself, surveying the area you’ve landed in. It’s not vastly different from the forest you’d been in before, but some of the trees look different and when you listen you can hear a few birdsongs that aren’t the ones you’ve lived among for the past few days. The sun is just starting to dip into the horizon. It lights everything in a soft, glowy orange. You’ll need to gather kindling again if you’re going to have a fire, but for now you just take a breath. The sunlight tangles in Remus’ hair, making his skin look buttery smooth and romanticizing his expression into one of contemplation rather than hauntedness. Your heart throbs, a warm sort of ache. You wonder if he can fix that, too.

“I know it’s not the same,” you say quietly, embarrassedly, “but at least for now, we have each other.” 

Remus smiles. It’s small and weary, but a smile nonetheless. “Yeah,” he says. “I’m glad for it.”

#i love it when they're all each other has </3 #remus lupin apocalypse au #remus lupin #remus lupin x fem!reader #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin x y/n #remus lupin x you #remus lupin x self insert #remus lupin fanfiction #remus lupin fanfic #remus lupin fic #remus lupin angst #remus lupin hurt/comfort #remus lupin au #remus lupin drabble #remus lupin scenario #remus lupin imagine #remus lupin blurb #remus lupin oneshot #remus lupin one shot #marauders #the marauders #marauders era #marauders fanfiction #marauders fandom #hp marauders #marauders x reader

[diejager]

Just the boys and König finding sh scars on reader, and/or helping them stitch a wound? Platonic, if possible

I’m gonna make the assumption (I might be horribly wrong about this…) that sh means self-harm???

Cw: Self-harm, blood, scars, protective behaviour, helicopter parent (Price and Laswell), angst?, fluff?, stitches, tell me if I missed any.

There’s a certain level of… panic in their eyes, the rising waves of fright until it threatened to drown them in a thick and dark abyss, swallowing their minds whole at the single fear of losing you to something they could have stopped; prevention they thought, a plan B in case plan A failed, but if they didn’t know, how could they have time to set it up? König almost had a heart attack when he broke the door at Gaz’s call, finding you slumped against the bathroom door, one hand on the door knob and another - the bloodied one - limply clutching your phone, eyes blinking blearily at them, clouded in confusion and fatigue. 

It didn’t take them long to call the rest, rushing you to the infirmary after your accident, cutting too deep and risking death from your slight slip of the hand. Laswell and Price were called, finding the four of them seated beside you after they stormed into the sterile room. You looked ashamed, not about the act of cutting yourself to feel more than the depression and darkness in your heart, but the act of being caught, letting them know of your… ways to refresh your mind. The shameful tilt of your head downwards, staring with heavy eyes at your bandaged wrist, cleaned and stitched up. 

Ghost had forced your sleeves up, rolling them until your biceps to show the extent of it, the many lines, crisscrossing in old and jagged lines of paler skin, standing starkly from the usual flush. He wasn’t disappointed at you, never, from a person who cut themselves to another, he was more so disappointed in himself from not catching the signs —a dark omen of pain and sorrow, forgetting that he was blinded by your happy smile to catch the tired gleam in your eyes. 

Both he and König knew the pain, the new scars that no one asked for, but kept adding and adding until it would eventually tear your arm off, limb from limb, piece by piece until you lost the will to keep on. He took on smoking instead, as self-destructive as cutting was, but the thicket of nicotine would calm his loud mind, and König had a therapist, someone he was… willing to talk to when things got too hard. They understood and felt, but failed you all the same, despite everything they vowed, they almost lost you because they were too blind to see past your thin mask. 

It was a feeling shared by the two sergeants, the more sensitive and sympathetic of the bunch, more in tune with heartfelt affection and human socialisation than the others, and the two weren’t afraid to voice it. The anger at themselves, the rage that crossed Soap’s face when he curled his fingers, bleeding his palms in the same manner you bled your feelings, hidden and alone in your dark room, bathroom and floor stained in the iron-rich ichor. 

Gaz made a face, lips pulled down, brows pinched and eyes wet, tears fluttering at the edge of his lashes. He was a soft man, feeling and sympathetic, nearing empathetic whenever he wanted to feel what you felt, but in a crisis like this, where the thought had crossed his mind once or twice, but never acted it, he was lost. Confused and afraid, a daze where he thought that - perhaps - was how you felt when he wasn’t there to ease your pain, ignorant of the subtle signs of agony in your heart, screaming for help when your mouth wouldn’t utter a single word. 

Price and Laswell hovered, combat helicopters roaming around you for any danger, watchful and worried, confident in their helping hand, but worried you would need help. Wanting to help, but afraid that needing it would mean something much deeper, and today was just the boiling point of it, the discovery of your sorrow and their dread and disgust at their inactivity. Laswell had made a few phone calls, her voice hushed as she spoke, eyeing Price for corrections and agreements until they came to the same consensus. 

If you hadn’t known any better, you would have considered them your parents, loving and caring, tender and affectionate, just as the rest of them, all friends and teammates you considered brothers. Yet, there was a stigma to it, one imposed by normal people that made you feel a certain way. Perhaps that why you hadn’t spoke about it, the dreadful need to keep it hidden until it was forced into the light. 

“You don’t have to do it alone anymore, luv,” Price promised, his low and rumbling voice that exhumed calm tenderness.

That was all it took you to sob, a dam creaking and breaking, letting your tears flood outwards while you clutched at the lapel of his jacket, hiding away in the familiar musk and cologne of his parental figure.

Taglist: @sae1kie @yeoldedumbslut @bvxygriimes @distracteddragoness @konigsblog @im-making-an-effort @daisychainsinknots @h0n3y-l3m0n05 @danielle143 @tuttifuckinfruttifriday @notspiders @brokenpieces-72 @petwifed @randominstake @hayleybarnesx @shironasumi @sparky--bunny @bloobewy @cod-z @sweetnanah @aldis-nuts @evolutionarry @kaoyamamegami @cassiecasluciluce

#x reader #cod mw2 #cod mw2 x reader #simon ghost riley #ghost mw2 #konig mw2 #konig x reader #simon ghost riley x reader #gaz mw2 #gaz x reader #soap mw2 #soap x reader #price mw2 #price x reader #laswell mw2 #task force 141 #tf 141 x reader #platonic relationships #tw self harm

[wol-fica]

-𝔼𝕩𝕔𝕖𝕝𝕝𝕖𝕟𝕔𝕖 ℙ𝕋𝟚-

pairings - taracarpenter x fem!reader

summary - you and tara are inseparable, but one trip away from New York could change all of it…

warnings - angst, talk of injuries, implied smut

an - forgot to post this :/

part 1

——————————

1 Week Later

You were running, fast and out of breath to get out of the airport and home as soon as you could. 

Four days after you landed in Montreal, you got a call from Sam telling you that another ghostface attack happened. Your heart dropped at the news, and you told her you would book the soonest flight possible.

Unfortunately, that flight would be three days later, and each hour of each day was grueling and terrifying. Your thoughts ran wild with Tara, if she was okay, what had happened, and why that fucker was back. 

You hurried past the crowd of people by the door, spotting your uber nearby. You ran over to him, threw your belongings in the car, and practically yelled the address at him. Your leg bounced the whole way, nails being chewed on during the ride.

You sent Tara a text at some point, saying you were home and on the way to her, but you didn’t get a response. She didn’t even read the message, which had your heart beating way too fast. 

Eventually you made it to the apartment complex, thanking your driver before throwing your bag over your shoulder and running inside. You went up four flights up stairs before reaching the Carpenter sisters door. Your fist met the wood, knocking light but fast. 

Each second felt like a minute, which then felt like an hour. You rocked impatiently on your feet, until the door clicked and swung open. There stood Sam, looking weary and tired, but alive. She smiled weakly at you, reaching to pull you into a hug.

“Y/N.” She said, giving you a sisterly squeeze, “Welcome back.”

“Hey Sam.” You replied, pulling back to give her a quick check over, “You okay?”

“No, but I will be.” She patted your shoulder, “Come on in.”

You walked past her into the living room, setting your bag down on one of their chairs before turning back to her. She looked tired, worn and beaten down from her encounter with ghostface. There was a new scar on her shoulder, stitched up and bruised around the edges. It looked deep, like whoever had slashed her had a personal agenda against her.

You eyed her warily, unsure of what to comment on. She assumed your thoughts, and gestures to the scar on her shoulder.

“Had to take a souvenir with me, didn’t I?” 

You didn’t know whether to laugh or scold her, but the look on her face told you that she was being humorous. So you snorted, stifling your laugh to a giggle as she chuckled with you.

“Haaa…uhm…where’s Tara?” You asked after calming down, wiping your eyes.

“She’s out with Mindy and Chad, they wanted to get lunch.” Sam replied, moving past you and into the kitchen, “Are you hungry? I’m sure it was a long flight.”

Your stomach comically growled, causing Sam to smirk, “Uhh yeah, I could use some food.”

She nodded, going to the fridge to make something for you to eat. You planned on following her, until the jingle of keys caught your attention. Your head whipped around, just in time to see three very familiar faces waltz into the room. Mindy came in first, Chad followed after…with Tara tucked under his arm?

You saw her before she saw you, which gave you a chance to analyze her features. She looked almost the same as when you left, just a little more pale than normal but you brushed it off as blood loss. Her arm was in a blue sling, contrasting against the black jeans and white blouse she wore. She was laughing, gazing up at Chad with eyes that you wish she was looking at you with, and that pained your heart.

“Oh hey Y/N!” Mindy said, waving at you.

Tara’s eyes snapped to you, wide and surprised to see that you were standing in her apartment. Time seemed to slow as she moved, speedily walking around the couch and throwing herself into your arms. Your arms enveloped her, pulling her in for a tight hug, her face tucking under your chin and into your chest.

Her scent invaded your nose, but it wasn’t the smell you remembered of her. Sure, it was still her earthy soil fragrance, but it had now mixed in with a masculine cologne that made your stomach churn unpleasantly. You knew who it belonged to, but you didn’t wanna assume the worst.

Maybe they just got close?

Hopefully.

“Y-you’re home…” She cried into your chest, hugging your waist tightly, “You c-came back…”

You took her chin in your hand, tilting her face up to look at you. Tears had cascaded down her face, ruining her mascara but that wasn’t really the problem at the moment. You smiled at her, leaning down to brush your lips against hers. She pushed herself into you, bouncing up on her toes when her lips met yours. 

The kiss was soft, passionate and sweet that had your heart thumping way too fast. Her lips were so delicious, plump, soft and all around irresistible. She leaned into you, chasing and huffing when you pulled back for air.

“I’m here.” You reassured her softly, kissing her forehead gently, “I’m not going anywhere.”

She sobbed at your words, grateful to have you back in her arms. A whimper passed her lips when you hugged her closer, your hand accidentally brushing against her new found scar on her back. You cringed, moving your hand to her lower back instead. 

“Sorry.” You mumbled, in which she hummed and squeezed you harder in response.

“It’s okay, you didn’t know.” She whispered into your ear, kissing the shell of it, “There’s a lot you don’t know…”

You smiled, pulling back to get a better look at her. Some hair had fallen into her face, so you gently tucked the locks behind her ear to see her features better. Tanned skin splashed with freckles, and beautiful brown eyes that had your knees buckling.

Your Tara.

“We need to catch you up on a lot.” Mindy said from across the room, giving you a tight lipped smile.  

“I’m sorry I wasn’t here.” You said, glancing around between all four of them, “I wish I was here to help.”

“Don’t belittle yourself like that.” Tara affirmed, pulling at your shirt to remove the wrinkles, “You couldn’t have known about anything.”

You sighed, giving a nod with a tight lipped smile. Your eyes trailed to Chad, locking a gaze with him. He was staring at you with a look you couldn’t quite pinpoint, a sort of narrowed unease look.

Jealousy.

“Hey man.” You said to him, catching his attention.

His face changed immediately, an award-winning smile on his face, “Hey Y/N/N.”

“Hey, your food is on the table.” Sam called from the room over, causing Mindy and Chad to start to move towards the door.

“We need to get back to our dorms.” Mindy said, giving you a smile and a wave, “See you in class!”

The door swung shut, and you subconsciously let out a sigh of relief. Chad was making you feel uncomfortable, and a small pit of sourness had formed in your stomach from seeing him so close to your girlfriend. You’re not sure if something had happened between them, or if the events of those two days had changed them, but there was a new spark there that you weren’t fond of. 

“How was your retreat?” Tara asked after you sat down and she slid herself into your side, “Did you enjoy it?”

“It was alright.” You shrugged, taking a large bite of the sandwich Sam made you, “Boring mostly.”

Tara hummed, leaning her head on your shoulder while your arm went around her to pull her into you. 

“I’d ask how it was here while I was gone, but that seems inappropriate.” You joked, watching Sam to gauge if that was okay to say.

She seemed stoic for a second, but let out a light chuckle at your humor. Tara giggled as well, pinching your side as a punishment but she seemed to let it slide. You smiled, turning to press your lips to her hair before finishing your sandwich and standing up.

“Thank you for feeding me Sam.” You said, leaning over the sink to wash your plate.

“Of course, you look like you need it.” She replied, taking the washed plate and setting it on the drying mat, “You also look like you need sleep.”

You nodded, a comedic yawn coming through at her statement. Tara snorted from behind you, in which Sam shrugged and you rolled your eyes.

“Just a nap though, nothing heavy.” You muttered, stretching your arms, “Is the guest room open?”

“Yeah it’s-.”

“You can sleep in mine!” Tara interrupted, jumping up from her chair, “It’s more comfortable anyways.”

You shrugged, giving Sam a thankful smile before grabbing your things and heading to your girlfriends room. Tara hurried behind you, taking one of your bags with her non-injured arm. You pushed her door open, subconsciously sighing at the sight of it. 

It was the same as when you left, still decorated like Tara begged you to do, still organized to perfection, and still smelling like the girl you loved. 

Still her.

The touch of a hand on your back made you jump, your head turning to catch Tara’s brown eyes. She gazed at you lovingly, a gentle smile on her face as her hand moved to cup your cheek.

“I missed you.” She murmured, standing on her tiptoes to press a soft kiss to your lips.

“I missed you more.” You replied, deepening the kiss and pulling her into you.

She mumbled something incoherent against your lips and turned her head to the side, slotting herself against you. Her tongue prodded against your mouth, wishing to be let in so she could properly taste you. You complied, parting your lips so she could infiltrate you.

“Mmph.” You moaned, your hands squeezing her hips with a bruising grip, “Tara…”

She hummed, trying to push you towards the bed. You almost agreed, until a waft of men’s cologne hit your nose again. It made you hesitate, and Tara felt your body tense up under her hand. 

She pulled back from you with a furrowed brow, “What’s wrong?”

You stared her down, blinking awkwardly and opening your mouth to speak. No words came, just pure silence as you stared at her. You wanted to ask about the cologne, you knew it belonged fo Chad and now you wanted to know what happened between them, but you also didn’t want to jeopardize your relationship just because you thought she was possibly doing something with him.

“Nothing I…I’m just tired.” You gave her a reassuring smile, but she saw right through you. 

“No something’s wrong, you’ve been weird since you got home.” She said, frowning at you, “Tell me.”

You shrugged, not really keen on speaking your concerns. Tara’s eyes narrowed, her lips curling down into a small pout. She shoved you lightly, pushing you back to sit on the edge of her bed. Once you sat down, she planted herself right in your lap, a way to make sure you wouldn’t run off and away from her.

“What is it?” She asked softly, her eyes tender and full of love, “You know you can talk to me, baby.”

“Tara, you wouldn’t want me to.” You murmured, rubbing her hips with your thumbs.

“That is such bullshit and you know it.”

You sighed and caved in, leaning in to press your lips to her cheek before you spoke.

“Did something happen between you and Chad while I was gone?” You asked tentatively, watching her reaction.

Tara stiffened, eyebrows furrowing and eyes darting away from yours instantly. You knew you hit the mark, especially when her hand left your shoulder to nervously play with the necklace you bought her.

“Not something I’m proud of.” She mumbled, turning her head away from you, “Promise you won’t scream at me.”

“Yeah, of course.” You replied, massaging her thighs in an effort to calm her nerves.

She inhaled, reaching up to thread her fingers in your hair. Her nails softly scratched your scalp, almost making your eyes flutter shut if you weren’t so focused on what she was about to tell you. 

“When we were at the theatre, trying to trap…ghostface.” Tara seethed, wincing at the lethal name, “Chad confessed to me.”

You stayed quiet, listening intently to what she had to say. Your thumbs rubbed on her thighs, coaxing her to tell you the rest. She took a deep breath, and sighed sadly before speaking.

“He kissed me, and I didn’t push him away.” 

You tensed, your eyes narrowing. Your emotions rose dangerously, but you remained as calm as you could possibly be. The promise you made rang in your ears, and yelling at her wouldn’t help the cause anyways. 

How could she kiss him? Why would he kiss her? Chad was well aware that you and Tara have been dating since the beginning of college, so what force compelled him to make a move on her when you were gone?

“I froze up, I didn’t know what to do.” Tara muttered sadly, reaching down to intertwin your fingers with hers, “His arms were around me, and I was so shocked that I just stood there and-”

You pulled her lips into yours, silencing her rambling immediately. She melted in your hold, hooking her arm around your neck to pull herself closer to you. Your arms slid around her waist, being well aware of her new injuries before hugging her gently. 

“You’re okay.” You mumbled to her, pressing a comforting kiss to her neck, “I’m not mad.”

She sighed in relief, dropping her head to rest on your shoulder before her body started to shake from her tears falling freely.

“I never meant to do that to you.” She sniffled, her hand rubbing your back, “The only reason he is still here is because I never told Sam and I didn’t wanna be a dick towards him.”

“It’s alright, Tara.” You reassured, patting her butt, “Did you at least remind him that you aren’t interested?”

She giggled, giving you a gentle squeeze, “Of course I did.”

You hummed, falling backwards onto the bed with her still on top of you. She squealed in surprise, laughing when you rolled over and began to pepper her neck with little feather kisses. She reached up and cupped your cheek, pulling your attention to her. Her eyes trailed over your features, seemingly taking in your appearance so she could remember it. 

“So beautiful.” Tara cooed, licking her lips before pulling you down into a kiss.

Your lips moved in sync, and your mind fired blank spots when her knee sneakily slid up between your legs.

A nap could wait. 

————————————

taglist: @cartierdreamx@tundra1029@red1culous@vorsdany@andsoigotabutterfly@theafterofnevermore@yomomisgay@house-of-lovin@slvt4lanadelrey@thenextdawn@nepobaby08@dunohilly@somekindofpoet@alexkolax@cinffy23@pedrosprincess@amberfreemansburntface@myfturn

#tara carpenter #tara #carpenter #tara carpenter fluff #tara carpenter smut #tara carpenter imagine #tara carpenter x reader #tara carpenter x you #tara carpenter x y/n #tara carpenter x female reader #sam carpenter #jenna #jenna ortega x reader #ortega #jenna ortega #jenna ortega x you #jenna ortega x fem reader #jenna ortega fluff #jenna ortega imagine #wolfi writes

[folkloresthings]

TOLERATE IT / FA14.

in which the older sister of lando norris finds herself teetering dangerously towards the precipice of her brother’s, significantly older, colleague.

( fernando alonso x norris!reader )

track one: gold rush. track two: delicate. track three: labyrinth. track four: false god. track five: happiness. track six: the 1. track seven: daylight. track eight: lover.

✩⡱ warnings: age gap! reader is 25, fernando is 41.

TWITTER.

INSTAGRAM.

liked by isahernaez, estebanocon, and 78,294 others

yourusername back in london town

view all 12,444 comments

landonorris mum asked if you’re coming to dinner on sunday?

⤷ yourusername tell her yes, i’ll bring dessert, and please teach her how to text

user queen is back in the same city as me i might cry

lewishamilton i’ll be around next week, we should grab coffee!

⤷ yourusername only if you bring roscoe

⤷ lewishamilton yes ma’am 🫡

user im going to miss her in the paddock :(

⤷ user fingers crossed she’s back after the break

it was rather refreshing, to be back in your own apartment after weeks of living hotel to hotel. knowing where everything is, cooking for yourself, spending every night under your own covers. granted, after nights spent close to fernando’s side, your double bed felt much emptier than it did before.

with the summer break begun, the lack of work was leaving you with little to do. and the apartment had been sitting empty for weeks, desperate for a deep cleaning. so, clad in an old shirt and some shorts, you got to work. halfway through wiping down the entire kitchen, your phone rang, silencing the nineties hits playlist you’d had on.

hurrying over in your fluffy socks, you glanced down at the ringing screen. fernando. you hadn’t seen him since that morning lando had shown up in your hotel room. frankly, after your conversation with your brother, you fled the country as quickly as you could.

“hi,” you greeted him tentatively, after answering the call. he was quiet on the other end, your heart picking up its pace with every moment of silence.

“you left without saying goodbye,” he eventually speaks, voice monotone and heavy. you curse him mentally for being so unreadable, so plain when he wants to be.

you sigh, a finger rubbing your brow bone as you settle yourself on the couch. “i’m sorry, ‘nando.”

you weren’t sure of what else to say. you glanced at the time, ten minutes past eleven, wondering what time it was where fernando was. still in belgium? back home in spain? he wasn’t here, and that seemed to squeeze at your heart.

“so, what does this mean?” the question you had been dreading. the question you had asked yourself the whole plane ride home, and every moment since.

“i don’t know,” you murmured, truthfully. “it’s so complicated. if… if we keep this up, we’ll only get attacked. and lando will constantly be on edge — i don’t know if he could ever really accept it.”

“we could make him—” fernando begins to argue, and you can hear the frustration in his voice now.

“please, just listen.” he falls quiet and you lean back into the cushions. “i won’t be able to live knowing my brother didn’t approve. i can’t lose him, ‘nando, he’s my best friend. but…”

your lip wobbles, a tear slipping down your cheek. one you quickly wipe away, willing your emotions to get back in shape. fernando notices the shake in your breath, and his heart breaks when he realises he can’t do anything to help.

“but… the time we spent together, it was wonderful. you’ve taken my whole heart and i’ve happily let you keep it. it’s not something i want to let go of.”

“can’t we have both?” fernando asks, ready to beg you to stay. “lando will come around. and who cares about the press? we’d have each other, that’s what matters.”

“and what if it goes wrong?” you ask, almost too sharply. “what then? i can never come to a race again, because i won’t be able to face you? or we make it awkward between you and lando? he really looks up to you, fernando.”

“what could go wrong?” he asks, though he knows the answer. he knows about his own mistakes, and the reputation that came from it. but he would never dare break your heart, for it would only ruin his own.

“fernando…”

“mi amor, please…” he doesn’t care how desperate he sounds, because he is desperate. desperate to love you, to have you forever. “at least let us try.”

you consider it for a moment, you really do. torn between the possible love of your life and your baby brother, the hellish debacle of the century. but blood ran thicker than water, right?

“we never should have started this,” you brave the words, though they stab you in the process. but you know the only way to do this is to hurt him, to give him a reason to stay away. no matter how it kills you. “we can’t go on. it’s not like it ever could have worked, and you know it’s true.”

“no,” he replies firmly, holding himself together. “no, i’m not letting you go that easily.”

“i’m sorry, fernando. try and enjoy your break, okay?” you click the red end call button before he can reply, turning your phone off and sinking into the cushions, body soon racking with gentle sobs.

INSTAGRAM.

liked by oscarpiastri, alex_albon, and 302,834 others

lando.jpg home sweet home

view all 89,270 comments

user back with the y/n content, the people’s princess 🫶🫶🫶

pierregasly y/n’s cooking 🔛🔝

carlossainz55 i want a norris family dinner rn

user Y/N’S SO CUTE

fernandoalo_official enjoy ❤️

writers note: whoopsies. this is short sorry i’m super duper busy atm 💌

#formula 1 #formula one #formula 1 imagine #formula 1 instagram au #formula 1 x reader #fernando alonso imagine #fernando alonso #fernando alonso instagram au #fernando alonso x reader #lando norris x reader #lando norris #carlos sainz x reader #charles leclerc x reader #lance stroll x reader #max verstappen x reader #lewis hamilton x reader #oscar piastri x reader #mick schumacher x reader

[mirukosbitchywife]

obanai, rengoku, gyomei, and all four uzuis x reader

part one here

part two of hashira x a reader who nearly died fighting demons!! idk if you can tell but this was SO HARD FOR ME TO DO!!!!! this is my first time ever writing for or even about obanai and gyomei really so i struggled with it! please let me know if they're super ooc i tried my hardest but idk if i got the characterization correct!!

tengen uzui plus makio uzui, suma uzui, and hinatsuru uzui:

•you'd wake up after being taken to the butterfly mansion with suma On Top of you crying into your shirt. makio tried to let her go but hina told her to let her have this :( tengen is just sitting quietly next to your bedside, with hina and makio sitting opposite him, all three holding onto both your hands

•tengen told you your actions were very unflashy and that you worried them. they had heart attacks when the crow arrived to inform them of the situation

•suma cries at you to never be so reckless again, makio scolds you (it's how she expresses love), and hina says you should join lord tengen in retirement

•if you lose an eye or something tengen WILL insist you match his. gotta be flashy even when disabled. he's a disabled icon

•even with his long lasting injuries, tengen, suma, makio, and hina are still all shinobi so expect your physical therapy process to be intense

kyojuro rengoku:

•honestly. he's an absolute wreck. has not left your side since he was alerted of your condition, not to do anything besides use the restroom. shinobu has to wrestle him from your beside to make him eat and sleep (sleeping in a chair does not count unfortunately for him)

•is so relieved when you wake up he Literally can't stop smiling. also yelling. he's yelling a Lot. but not in a bad way of course, he's just speaking Very enthusiastically! he might even cry from happiness at seeing you alive and mostly well and moving around

•will literally do everything for you. will not let you move a muscle to do anything while you're recovering essentially. like oh you want some water? he's getting it. you need a book/pen/a blanket, literally anything that you reach for he's going no no you don't need to be moving around let me get it for you even if the item is in your reach

iguro obanai:

•is probably the only one who gives you peace. of course he's concerned, and he's been staying by your side waiting for when you wake up, but will give you space to breathe

•i'm going to assume if you like obanai you also like snakes, because when you wake up kaburamaru is wrapped around you too, he was also concerned okay :(

•would quietly tell you how much you worried him and how he had rushed there. and by that i mean he RAN nobody has ever seen him move that fast outside of battle. he was just really concerned:(

•will hiss at people who try to enter your room in the butterfly mansion. the butterfly girls and aoi are annoyed by him but just ignore it, and inosuke actually starts snorting back at his hissing and they almost actually fight.

•really reliable while you're recovering, a silent but steady presence at your side. is a little bit of a simp and will do whatever you ask bc your hurt :( of course he'll do anything for you :(

gyomei himejima:

•would be silently kneeling by your bedside in prayer with tears streaming down his face when you wake up. immediately notices when you're actually awake from the change in your breathing and immediately stands up and grabs your hands

•also another one who gives you breathing space, but is a little more clingy. might not voice it aloud but is terrified of losing you too and being alone again

•you relish in his strong but silent presence by your side, he doesn't have much to say beyond the fact he was worried about you, but he's more of an actions speak louder than words type person and is there when you need him

•an actual rock for you during your recovery. him being disabled doesn't mean he's not able to help you with your physical therapy and taking care of yourself!! very content to help you

•maybe okay. hear me out. maybe you could convince him to sneak you out and give you piggyback rides once you're well, but not completely healed enough to leave the butterfly mansion. he seems like a big softie who will give into anything that doesn't have any real consequences

#demon slayer #tengen x y/n #tengen x you #tengen x reader #uzui x you #uzui x y/n #uzui x reader #rengoku x reader #kyojuro rengoku x reader #rengoku x you #rengoku x y/n #obanai x you #obanai x y/n #obanai x reader #gyomei x y/n #gyomei x reader #gyomei x you #makio uzui #hinatsuru uzui #suma uzui #uzui x wives x reader #uzui family #kyojuro x y/n #kyojuro x reader #kyojuro x you #iguro x reader #iguro x y/n #himejima x reader #gyomei himejima #kny x reader