#Comparative lit major at work

[ladyknight33]

Unclip my Wings

Why use this phrase when Alastor laments the deal he is stuck in?

tl;dr: skip to midway down to So here is the Proposed Theory. I don't want to ruin the build up and you'll probably figure it out after with all the pictures I chose. It's not Lilith.

But after watching the Pilot episode of Harbin Hotel (of course I watched after I binged the entire season), I had a new appreciation for Alastor and his function at the Hotel.

But the main question we have is WHY? Why is a demon as powerful as Alastor at the Hotel in the first place? Why is he acting as the general manager? And then Husker gives up that little piece of information that Alastor is also bound to someone. Now we're asking WHO?

Who could possibly have enough power to contain a demon as strong as Alastor. Of note is seven year absence which remarkably coinsides with Lilith's disappearance. But that seems a bit too coincidental.

During the meeting with Lucifer, Alastor's constant angry glaring at Lucifer indicates he has certain underlying issues not addressed. Then Lucifer's agressive dismal of Alastor at their first meeting. It brings to mind the quote "[He] protests too much." Then the imagry during the "Dad Beat Dad" song where Lucifer has Alastor's head on a platter, having Alastor in a frying pan, and baked in a pie.

These images are blatant displays of power over the victim. And Lucifer seems to relish these images far too much, to the point displaying out right disturbing glee at having Alastor in the frying pan.

Alastor counters with needling about exactly what bothers Lucifer the most. Charlie.

Gaining Charlie's loyalty appears to be Alastor's primary objective. He hasn't actualy made it a secret that he would love to make a deal for Charlie's soul. In fact the Brady Bunch style picture is all about boxing Charlie in.

Which begs the question of why would Alastor want Charlie's soul? What could he possibly need such a powerful bargaining chip for? Who would do anything to free Charlie from such a deal?

We know Lucifer would.

WIthout knowing Lilith's side of the story, we're at a loss as to her choice. But the fact that she was in Heaven during this entire show thus far, gives an indication that she wants nothing to do with Hell.

So Alastor is searching for a way out of his deal and he has set his sights on Charlie.

In the pilot Alastor is in the news room watching Charlie fail to generate interest in her hotel. He offers his services which Charlie turns down many times. He spends a fair amount of time staring at the portrait of the Morningstar family. He claims to want to help for the entertainment value, which is a much lighter excuse than trying to infiltrate Charlie's trust.

It ends with Charlie agreeing, but without any sort of deal being made.

The phrase "Unclip my Wings" during the final song kept bothering me. It seemed unusual for a demon to reference wings as the majority of characters with wings are Angels. (Husker is something different, more gargoyle) Besides having the excellent rhyming for the phrase "pulling all the strings" it begs the question of what if Alastor actually had wings at some point? Unlikely, but what if he had had a taste of Angelic power and wants it again. If he had Angelic powers no one could stop him from pulling the strings.

Wings are also symbols for freedom. And Alastor clearly wants his freedom more than anything.

Which brings up the point of why did Alastor sell his soul in the first place? What did he possibly want so bad as to give up his freedom?

Before his disappearance Alastor was killing the major Overlords, creating power vaccums he no doubt exploited. Making him one of the most feared demons in all of Hell. How would the King and Queen of Hell react to a mortal soul beginning to rival them in power?

Wouldn't it make sense to attempt to control this Demon so that it does not upset their power?

Neither Lilith nor Lucifer appear very hands on with ruling Hell. In fact, Lucifer doesn't appear in the last battle until Adam expressly threatens Charlie and Charlie is not capable defending herself. Lucifer does apologize for not being there sooner. So why? What was holding him back from fighting alongside his daughter when he cares so much for her? Is there something that literally holds him back from interfering in the Extermination or with the ongoings of Hell in general?

If so, it would make sense to have someone else deal with the out of control demons.

But he does stick around for the rebuilding of the hotel, which Alastor is absent for.

So here is the Proposed Theory

In order to get control of the disruption of Alastor killing off Overlords and to prevent Alastor from becoming so powerful as to kill Lilith or Lucifer, Lilith meets with Adam and gets the Extermination started to limit how much power Alastor can gain from collecting souls.

Meanwhile Lucifer is part of the plan, but isn't particularly thrilled. What he doesn't know is that Lilith made a deal with Adam. Nor that Lilith got to lounge around in Heaven for getting Lucifer to agree to the Extermination.

Lucifer captures the biggest threat he knows, Alastor the Radio Demon. At this point Alastor has killed all the Demon Overlords that threatened his rise to power, so it stands to reason that Lilith might have attempted to stop the rouge demon and perished.

Alastor is now caged by Lucifer and wants his freedom.

Alastor is in a position where he is willing to make a deal with the King of Hell himself.

Lucifer is a creator. We see him build rubber ducks at first then recreating the Hazbin Hotel for Charlie. He does not want any more destruction or carnage. But when Charlie starts the Hazbin Hotel to rehabilitate sinners, Lucifer wants to help, but can't.

What he does have is a powerful demon who would do anything for a taste of freedom.

Lucifer makes a deal for Alastor's soul.

The evidence?

Alastor's absolute hatred for Lucifer

Alastor seeking a deal with Lucifer's daughter

Alastor gleefully gloating over Charlie's trust in him

Lucifer's ability to manipulate Alastor's outfit and postures

Lucifer's glee at presenting Alastor's severed head

Lucifer enacting violence against Alastor

Alastor not seeking retaliation

Alastor's eyes seeking his prey, making sure Lucifer knows

This image where Alastor and Lucifer are nose to nose, glaring with bared teeth is perhaps the only time that Alastor's smile is close to cracking. It is also striking that Alastor's grin is nearly identical to Lucifer's in that it takes up half the face it is so large.

As Alastor said, there is no telling what is behind a smile, particularly when it is designed to confuse your enemies.

Lucifer cannot interfere with the ongoings of Hell. Lilith wants nothing to do with Hell at this point. Charlie is determined to reform sinners and Lucifer wants to protect his daughter.

Lucifer is furious that he has to rely on a demon to help his daughter when that is all he wants to do and constantly shows his superiority over Alastor whenever he gets a chance. But does not tell Charlie any of this because he doesn't want her fury or believing that her father doesn't think she can accomplish it by herself.

Not helping in the Battle against Adam until after Alastor is out of the fight, could easily be Lucifer's way of proving Alastor cannot protect Charlie. Coming in to save the day could be Lucifer proving his worth as a father.

Either way it is far to convenient for Alastor to show up when Charlie is announcing her Hotel. Alastor's soul is owned by someone who would release it should Charlie be the bargaining chip.

Only time will tell what the truth is.

Here's to hoping I don't predict anything, because I want to be surprised. Which is why I watch most things because it is the HOW did it happen rather than WHAT happened that keeps me going.

#hazbin hotel #alastor #hazbin alastor #hazbin lucifer #lucifer morningstar #hazbin lilith #charlie morningstar #hazbin charlie #charlie hazbin hotel #alastor hazbin hotel #the radio demon #alastor the radio demon #fan theory #who owns Alastor's soul #lilith morningstar #comparative literature #comparative lit major at work #i spent too much time on this #hazbin hotel theory #hazbin hotel thoughts

[andhumanslovedstories]

Love when Aang and Zuko get those contrasting storylines. It takes me back to being in a college lit class, and I have an essay to slam out by tomorrow. This time it’s Aang trying to undo Jet’s brainwashing by the Dai Li versus Iroh trying to convince Zuko to settle down and make a life in Ba Sing Se. Here’s two takes in one episode on the same fuckin theme, I could write 2,000 words about that out with plenty of time to spare for not writing any of that and instead dicking around in tumblr as inside I scream and scream and scream at myself oh my god why are you on tumblr write your essay write your essay hmm a link to a little game where you dress up dolls you say

#atla #I will not forget the actual misery of writing some of those essays #that’s the devil trying to lure you into grad school #anyway I’d use this ep in a supporting argument for an essay on iroh being a bad uncle #because a contrarian opinion about a major part of a work’s argument where the nuance of the argument #means there’s a counter argument to the text within the text itself #anyway that’s the easiest thing in the world to get a quick essay out of #compare and contrast and then saying ‘character that’s good is actually character that’s BAD’ #it’s a fun little OH NO OH NO EVEN IN THE TAGS??? EVEN IN THE TAGS I AM HERE MISSING LIT ESSAYS????

[knightsickness]

westerosi perfume culture thoughts based on medieval/early modern ^^

incense in septs to the point of both cat and sansa immediately thinking of the smell of it when thinking about the faith. this is fully a ‘the faith is just catholicism’ thing theres reference to a censer being used at tywin’s funeral, though this is also to cover the smell of the body - i believe its implied theyre using a lot more incense than they typically would and failing to overpower the rot smell

scented candles and incense are both used in septs and to scent rooms - scented candles higher-end, beeswax candles, which even unscented smell quite sweet and are quite expensive (they burn cleanly and don’t spit). animal fat tallow candles are much cheaper but perfume can’t stop rotting fat smelling of rotting fat it just combines with it. tallow tends to be used in poorer settings, for light not scent

scented beeswax candles used by tyrion and cat, and in the sept of baelor - imo v unlikely most smallfolk or smaller septs are buying them regularly, especially considering how many candles they need to keep lit. i’d say tallow 90% of the time beeswax on holy days

basically every noble in kings landing seems to wear perfume, ned specifically repulsed by the fact that robert now does which is crazy. whats roberts taste in perfume like

varys specifically is always described as perfumed, which is like. effeminacy due to eunuch status he leans into but also his ambiguous origin - while a lot of people in westeros wear perfume it seems to be significantly more popular in the free cities + beyond, vv frequently mentioned in dany chapters

perfumed and powdered often go together, varys and lysa off the top of my head - powders could also be scented, quite popular in france

multiple references to oldtown being heavily perfumed, dual reference to incense as a faith centre and worn perfume on a dowager, oldtown as a wealthy city and consumer centre

perfume also strongly associated with prostitution, an irony - septs and brothels often scented with incense, the ‘perfumed boy’ slaves victarion kills, satin wearing scent in his beard

popular scents rarely described in more detail than a type of flower or ‘sweet’ - most interesting perfume a westerosi lady wears is taena’s wildflower and musk, which cersei compares to the smell of moss

the tyrells seem to only wear rosewater this is pretty explicitly part of their branding as a house. even the blue bard a tyrell servant washes his hair with rosewater. most roses actually don’t distill well i’m assuming they have some westerosi equivalent to damask roses grown in bulk at highgarden or some other reach territory (probably at highgarden their scent in the gardens would be part of the tyrell image cultivation there. henry viii did this specific thing so you would smell his rose perfume in the gardens even when he was away from home which some historians have referred to as a ‘serve’) only like two varieties of rose work in perfuming. i’d also speculate that the roses margaery and her ladies brought to tywin’s funeral, if they were strong-smelling enough to cover the smell of an unnaturally rotting corpse, were probably roses scented with rosewater

perfume application on people typically oils, waters and more rarely waxes - multiple mentions of perfumed beards or hairstyles and waxes would be easier for that - perfume in baths common for the wealthy

no mention of scented accessories e.g. gloves or fans, though both immensely popular in elizabethan england - are there civet cats or equivalent in westeros? there are whales and thus presumably ambergris, taena’s perfume referred to as musky but unclear if this means it contains actual musk - animal perfumes are best for scenting leather, strong and waxy and other lighter scents can cling to them. dany wears scented silk clothes

tyrion associates worn perfume strongly with old whores, which suggests cheap perfume widely accessible, probably perfumer’s shops in major cities (notable bc otherwise we could conclude perfumers worked primarily for aristocratic patrons)

there are probably westerosi perfume-makers but its also likely theres a solid luxury import trade - dorne and the free cities both have established distinct perfume cultures and strong trade links with merchants

#asoiaf #a song of ice and fire

[zwedexx]

AWFC x English-Italian Reader - Introduction

Summary: Reader is playing in a champions league game and get severely injured

TW: Injury?

WC: 645

A/N: Injury won the polls so injury it is. Nothing is proof read. The angsty and more serious stuff starts with the Chapters. Also this is my version of the Arsenal-Lyon game (December 15, 2022). I think the 1 or 2 next chapter will go from December 2022 to ~December 2023. Anyways, share your opinions and suggestions. Also requests are open and I'd really love to try my hand at requests so please submit some.

You joined Arsenal at a young age, 17 years old. You were a bombshell when you landed in the WSL. You might have grown up in England but you were Italian by birth and ancestry. You brought 3 Italian things with you, your defensive style, hand gestures and a last name no commentator could pronounce properly.

You quickly gained a reputation for being fearless LB, you weren’t necessarily a dirty player but you had being compared to Katie a few times. You were willing to make a risky tackle or sacrifice your body if it meant you’d stop a goal. You were never the tallest on the team, that distinction going to the Swedes and you weren’t the biggest but you had heart and stupidity. 

Now here you were a full year, 4 goals, 5 yellows and 1 red later standing in the tunnel of a group stage champions league match against Lyon. 

You felt this odd sense of nervousness, this was your first start in a champions league game but it was unusual for you. You were taken out of your thoughts when you felt Viv’s arms on your shoulders as she guided you out of the tunnel. 

The match was quite uneventful for the majority of the first half, Lyon had some good chances and so did Arsenal. Your nerves had calmed down, you were focused. You had even stopped a breakaway from Malard. 

Lyon’s best chance was in 45’+1. Bacha had a free kick from right before the halfway line. She passed it to Morroni then it came back to Bacha who launched the ball over the crowd. You had been tracking Gilles, the Lyon centerback, you knew she was excellent with her head and if it touched the ball it was sure to be a goal. You saw the ball fly over, hit Horan and go back up into the air. You jumped high, trying to reach the ball before Gilles can get a head to it and you succeeded. You felt the ball hit your head and you loosed up a bit, forgetting that the opposing player head was still in motion. Instead of heading the ball, Gilles collided with the side of your head. You feel a sharp excruciating pain, something you’d never experienced before then nothing. You were out. 

“Y/N.” You could hear a faint sound of someones voice shouting your name. 

“Y/N can you hear me.”

You tried to move, tried to open your eyes but you felt trapped in your own body. Nothing wanted to work. It’d take a few moments before you’d gotten some control back and you were able to open your eyes. 

You were completely surrounded by medical staff, it was sort of overwhelming but you were able to spot the voice calling you, Leah. You could see the worry and panic in her face, you wanted to give her a smile or a sign that you’d be okay but it was hard enough to keep your eyes open. The medics were attempting to speak to you but their words were just faded noises and before they were able to finish you felt your eyes roll to the back of your head and you were out once more.

The next you remembered was machines beeping. This incessant beeping that made your head hurt each time it went off. Waking up this time was far easier, you had more control and you felt a little more awake. 

“Y/N, for the love of god please tell me something. “ Leah had notice you’d woken up, Jordan had also been in the room but was asleep on the couch next to 4 other bags likely from other teammates that had stepped out.

“Y/N, can you understand me.” Leah asked again, hoping, praying for any response. 

“Leah… What- What happened” you croaked out.

Leah face lit up from your response but there was pain behind eyes. You could see tears begin to well up.

“Too much, Y/N/N, too much.” 

#woso one shot #woso #woso x reader #arsenal wfc #arsenal women #woso fanfics #woso community #woso soccer #womens football #engwnt #woso imagine #woso couples #leah williamson #ol féminin #olympique lyonnais #vanessa gilles #vivianne miedema #selma bacha #perle morroni #lindsey horan

[gubsbuubs]

I hate it when you're right

(18+)

Pairing: Jake Peralta x Female!Reader

Warnings: Friends to lovers; LOTS of teasing, slow burn?, Smut; Creampie; Dirty talk.

Request:Could you do a Jake Peralta x Reader work partners to hookup? Like they’ve been work partners forever, until one night way too late at the bar they hook up? And realize “oh fuck maybe i do like him like that?”

A/N: Hi, my loves! I´m not dead I swear. Here's the first Peralta smut, hope everyone enjoys. 🍒

English is not my first language - My requests are open!

"How much longer is this going to take?" Peralta's agitated voice echoed through the dark alley as he paced back and forth, his restless energy practically bouncing off the walls.

I understood his frustration; we'd been waiting for what felt like hours, when in reality, it had only been about forty minutes. Compared to the nearby street, this alley was dark and dank; graffiti adorned the walls, and the air smelled faintly of waste. At the end of it stood an abandoned store, rumored to be a hotspot for illegal drug deals. After receiving a tip earlier this nigth, we had been staking out the area in hopes of catching distributors. Slowly, I watched as Peralta's impatience grew, and I couldn't help but wonder if our tip had just been a false lead.

Amidst the distant sounds of traffic and the faint hum of the city, Jake's distressed movements seemed amplified; every passing car and distant footstep only seemed to fuel his uneasiness. Honestly, I couldn't blame him; this place gave off major creepy vibes, but we had a job to do, and that meant keeping our cool and waiting for the right person to arrive.

"Hey, take a breather," I suggested, attempting to soothe his nervous demeanor. "You're coming off a bit suspicious."

He halted in his tracks, scratching the back of his head with a sheepish grin. "Sorry about that. I just can't stand waiting, you know?"

"I understand, but we really need to keep it together," I stressed, aiming to ease his tension. "Can you just stand there and act normal?"

"I'm tryiiiiiiing," his voice tinged with a hint of whining as he continued pacing.

"Well, try harder," I urged, "You look like a total cop right now."

His pacing halted abruptly, and he turned to me with wide eyes, a look of realization dawning on his face. "Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god," he muttered frantically. "We look like cops, and we´re getting shot in the face."

"Relax, Peralta," I chuckled, trying to inject some levity into the situation.

"Y/n" He sighed deeply, standing in front of me with his hands in his pockets,"I don't want to get shot; my face is my prized possession." His brow furrowed as he confessed dramatically.

I tilted my head, "Come on, Peralta," I quipped, a playful grin tugging at the corners of my lips. "If you get shot, I think your face would be the least of our concerns. I mean, you'd be dead!"

"Man, I should've prepared a character for a cover-up," Jake exclaimed, shaking his head ruefully. "We can't just stand here looking like this... like cops."

"Well, it's a little late for that now,"

He let out an exaggerated sigh, crossing his arms in frustration. "Let me think of something," he declared, his hand moving to his chin and rubbing it thoughtfully as he pondered our predicament.

I couldn't help but chuckle softly as I glanced around at the dimly lit street nearby, feeling the tension slowly dissipate as Jake's panicked expression softened into one of contemplation.

But then, with a sudden clarity, Jake snapped his fingers, "I've got it!" he exclaimed.

His words were accompanied by his familiar, stupid, and playful smirk. It was a look that spelled trouble, and to be honest, although I knew nothing good would come out of his mouth, I couldn't help but feel intrigued.

"Spill it, Peralta," I said, my hands tucked into my jean pockets, adopting a casual stance as I awaited his response. With Jake, you never quite knew what you were going to get, but you could always count on it being entertaining, if nothing else.

"You see, Y/n," he approached slowly, a mischievous grin playing on his lips as his left hand found its place against the wall behind me, anchoring me as he leaned in. "I was thinking..." he trailed off, his tone dripping with exaggerated suspense.

I couldn't help but roll my eyes playfully at his teasing manner. "Oh, here we go again," I retorted gently, halting his advances with a hand on his chest. "Another one of Jake's brilliant ideas, right?"

"Come on, Y/N, don't be like that," he said, his tone a mix of amusement and pleading. "You know you love my brilliant ideas."

"Oh, absolutely," I replied with a touch of sarcasm. "They're right up there with 'let's infiltrate this wedding' and 'let's dress up as clowns for the undercover operation.'"

"Hey, those are classic moments in my detective history," he protested, a grin spreading across his face. "One day they'll make a movie about me."

I couldn't resist lightly patting his chest. "Sure, buddy, for sure."

As Jake leaned in closer, I couldn't deny the surge of warmth that spread through me. Despite my attempts to conceal it, his proximity was starting to affect me.

Jake and I had a playful dynamic, often flirting with each other, and he wasn't shy about expressing his interest; he even told me countless times how I was "missing out" on a chance to be with him.

And don´t get me wrong, while I did find him undeniably attractive, I was hesitant to entertain the idea of taking things beyond friendship. Our coworker-turned-friend relationship was something I cherished, and I didn't want to risk complicating it with romantic entanglements.

So, no, nothing ever happened apart from the casual, harmless flirting. Our banter kept things light and enjoyable, never crossing the line into anything more serious. Despite the occasional temptation, we both understood the importance of maintaining boundaries in our friendship.

"Seriously, hear me out on this one," he continued, "What if we… I don't know… pretend to make out? It's the perfect cover-up!" His suggestion hung in the air, and for a moment, there was silence as we both processed the absurdity of his idea. His head fell to the side, awaiting my response with a playful smirk dancing on his lips.

"You wish, Peralta." I laughed and shook my head. "I mean, I know you'd do anything to steal a kiss from me, but making out in a dark alley? That's a bit too romantic even for you, don't you think?"

"Hey, it was worth a shot, right?" As he moved to step away from the wall, I caught movement at the beginning of the street behind him. Acting quickly, I grabbed him by the tie, the one he always refused to wear, and shot him a warning look. Understanding my silent cue, he lowered his head to mine, trying to appear inconspicuous as he whispered in my ear. "Is it them?"

"Maybe," I quietly answered, my heart pounding as I realized we were being watched. The figures stood at the beginning of the street, whispering to each other; they wore on to us for sure.

"Oh my god, they know, don't they?" he whispered, his voice tinged with worry. "What do we do, Y/L/N? I don't want to get shot in the face," he pleaded, his panic palpable.

Fuck I hate when he's right...

"Screw it," I whispered, my voice filled with determination. Pulling him closer, I crashed my lips into his. He immediately reacted, his arms encircling my waist as he pinned me against the wall. His lips were softer than I imagined, but his hands were rough as they traveled up my sides to rest on the back of my neck, pulling me even closer. Although the kiss was a desperate attempt to obfuscate the approaching perps, it was evident that Jake was definitely enjoying it more than it was intended. I couldn't help but give in to the moment as our kiss intensified as his tongue traced over my lower lip, kindly begging for more.

The footsteps grew louder, signaling the approach of whoever was out there. Without a second thought, his hand found its place on the back of my thigh, pulling me in closer. With my leg lifted around him, our bodies pressed together, and his fingers lightly held me in place.

Abruptly, the footsteps ceased and a voice cut through the moment. "Hey, what are you guys doing here?" one of the men asked, his tone cautious.

Jake broke the kiss. "Do you mind?" He retorted sharply, giving the guy a pointed look, before catching my lips again. I eagerly responded, letting my hands tangle up in his hair as he leaned closer to me.

The two guys just chuckled and exchanged knowing glances before sauntering off to the end of the alley. It worked; the stupid plan actually worked.

I waited until the footsteps were barely audible before breaking the kiss. I raised my head to get a better look, and Jake let his lips travel, leaving warm, open-mouthed kisses down my chin and into my neck. I bit my lip as I suppressed a moan I knew I was holding, glancing to see the two figures waiting by the door. "Jake, they're just standing there." I breathed out.

"Keep your eyes on them," he ordered, as he pressed himself against me.

I fought to keep my focus, torn between the intoxicating sensation of Jake's lips on me and the need to maintain our cover. Despite the overwhelming desire to lose myself in the moment, I stole quick glances towards where the perps stood, ensuring we weren't drawing any unwanted attention.

Suddenly, the door creaked open, and a new figure emerged, a brown bag in hand, joining the other two with a casual greeting. My heart pounded in my chest; it was going down, and we were going to get these guys. "Jake... Jake," I whispered urgently, breaking our embrace. His eyes met mine, and he immediately understood. Without hesitation, we sprang into action, charging towards the unsuspecting trio.

"NYPD!" Jake's voice boomed, cutting through the tense silence with commanding authority as he brandished his gun. I followed suit, drawing my own weapon, the weight of it familiar and reassuring in my hand. The perps froze, their faces registering shock as they realized they had been caught red-handed.

—xx—

It had been a few days since that night in the alley. With the intel we extracted from the three guys Jake and I caught, we successfully dismantled one of the biggest drug operations in Brooklyn. And to top it off, we managed to nab the ringleader himself. It was a major win for the team and definitely a cause for celebration. So naturally, we found ourselves at Shaw's, ready to toast to our victory.

"To the Nine-Nine," Captain Holt's voice resounded with strength as he lifted his glass high in the center of our circle. "To the Nine-Nine," we all echoed, raising ours in unison. With cheers and the clinking of half-empty glasses, we celebrated our hard work.

"Now disperse," he announced, his tone carrying a hint of warmth. "I want you all to have fun tonight; you deserve it." and with a wave of his hand, he indicated for us to move from our celebratory circle, encouraging us to enjoy the rest of the evening.

With that, I abruptly turned to face the bar, my attention drawn to the array of bottles lining the shelves. Caught off guard by a sudden collision, I stumbled backward, my balance momentarily disrupted. As I blinked in surprise, I found myself locking eyes with Jake, his hands reaching out to steady me by the waist. A rush of warmth flooded through me at the contact, and for a fleeting moment, time seemed to stand still as our gazes lingered.

"Whoa, sorry about that," I mumbled, feeling the heat rise to my cheeks as embarrassment washed over me.

His expression turned sheepish as he offered a tentative smile, his eyes crinkling at the corners with genuine warmth. After a brief moment of silence, he cleared his throat awkwardly. "Hey, no worries," he said lightly, a hint of amusement lacing his tone. Raising a hand, he scratched the back of his neck in a self-conscious gesture. "Guess I should've watched where I was going, huh?"

Our eyes remained locked, neither of us willing to be the first to look or moove away. "Well, at least we're not in an alley this time," I blurted out, trying to break the awkwardness with a touch of humor. He chuckled softly, the tension between us easing slightly as we both shared a small laugh.

"Dark alley or not, this was a great case," he said, his tone softening as he spoke. "I loved working with you, and I think we did a great job." His sincerity warmed my heart, and his light squeeze on my side felt like a silent reassurance.

Taking a step back, I broke away from his hold, trying to compose myself. My heart raced with the sudden rush of emotions. "Well... um..." I stammered nervously, my mind scrambling for something coherent to say. "I think we should celebrate. I'll be with Rosa at the bar," I continued, my voice wavering slightly as I awkwardly backed away from where we stood. "I'll see you around, Peralta."

As I approached the bar, Rosa's amused expression was already evident. Her playful tone cut through the air as I settled onto the bar stool beside her.

"What the hell was that?" she quipped.

I offered a weak shrug, attempting to play it cool. "What was what?" my voice slightly shaking as I avoided her knowing gaze.

"Oh, come on," she teased, gesturing toward the table behind her where Peralta and Charles were now seated. "That little dance back there, the eyefucking," she continued.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, no eyes were fucking back there!" I held my finger up in protest, trying to suppress a nervous laugh.

She sighed and took a sip of her drink, her gaze thoughtful. "Man, what the hell happened on the stakeout? You guys have been so weird…the glances, the lingering touches..."

"Hey, we have been doing none of that," I lied, attempting to deflect Rosa's probing with a forced casualness. Deep down, I knew she wasn't the only one who noticed. Despite being preoccupied with the bust operation for the past few days, I couldn't ignore the subtle shifts in Jake's behavior around me. He looked at me more often than usual, sat closer, and his touches lingered longer. I understood it all too well. I wasn't oblivious. We shared a kiss, and it wasn't just any kiss. There was something there—something I couldn't shake off.

"Bullshit," she retorted, "I mean, I understand tuning Boyle out when he talks, but Jake is literally not listening to a single word."

I glanced from my drink to the booth where Jake sat, slumped against the leather cushions with his legs spread out. He appeared relaxed, toying with his whisley glass that sat on his thigh. His gaze was already on me, peeking through his lowered eyebrows.

Our eyes met, and in that moment, I found myself unable to look away from him, captivated by the intensity of his gaze. What the hell was this man doing to me? It was as if every fiber of my being was drawn to him, despite my best efforts to resist.

"See, you're doing it again!" Rosa exclaimed loudly, her voice cutting through the chatter of the bar.

I immediately shook my head, laughing nervously. "Oh my god! Doing what, Diaz?" I turned toward the bar, signaling for another round of drinks, hoping to distract both of us from the uncomfortable topic.

She raised an eyebrow, her smirk widening as she leaned in closer. "The. Eye. Fucking," she punctuated each word.

"Rosa! No!" I exclaimed, my cheeks flushing with embarrassment. "No eyefucking going on," I added quickly, hoping to put an end to the teasing before it went any further.

"I know you kissed him," she said casually, her tone soft but firm, leaving no room for denial.

"What? No, that's not true!" My voice probably went up an octave, betraying my attempt at denial.

Rosa didn't waver, analyzing my reaction with a knowing look that seemed to cut straight through me.

"Fuck," I shook my head, looking to the side in resignation. "Okay, fine, I did, but it was only for the mission," I admitted reluctantly.

She chuckled, shaking her head. "Sure, sure, just for the mission."

"Oh, shut up," I lightly smacked her arm, playfully annoyed. "Who told you anyway?"

"Let's just say I have my sources,", a sly smile playing at the corners of her lips.

"Diaz!" I threatened, pointing my finger at her. "Spill it now or else!" My tone was half-joking, but there was a hint of determination in my eyes.

"Okay, okay," she conceded, raising her hands in defense. "It was Boyle."

"Boyle knows?" My eyes widened with shock. If Boyle knew, then everyone knew.

"Yeah, apparently Jake was glowing," she confirmed, "All smiles, couldn't stop grinning like a kid in a candy store." She took another sip of her drink, a knowing smirk playing on her lips. "So Boyle insisted, and eventually, he spilled the beans."

"Man, that's so embarrassing," I groaned, feeling the heat rising in my cheeks as I buried my face in my hands.

"Why?" Rosa regarded me with a serious expression.

"Well, because, you know... it's Jake," I mumbled, struggling to find the right words. "I don't want to... to..."

She held knowing look in her eyes, like she could read my thoughts, "To what?"

"Well, you know... be with him... I don't want that," Despite my attempt at denial, I couldn't shake the nagging feeling that I wasn't convincing anyone, not even myself, that I didn't want Jake.

"Man, it's obvious you guys want to be with each other; just go for it," she said with a shrug, her tone matter-of-fact. "I mean, he's still eyefucking you across the room," she added, gesturing once again in Jake's direction, her point crystal clear.

"He is, isn't he?" I lightly smacked my forehead, as if to hide my face, letting out a chuckle. I felt a sense of relief wash over me; deep down, I knew she had a point.

Glancing over to Jake, it seemed like he hadn't moved an inch since I last looked at him.

"He's not the most subtle," she said, a knowing smile tugging at the corners of her lips.

I pondered for a moment as I swirled my drink. Well, if Jake was willing to put himself out there to show his interest so openly, then maybe I should do the same. Maybe it was time to stop dancing around each other and just go for it.

"I have to fuck him, don't I?" I quipped with a smile, my voice low and filled with a hint of mischief.

Rosa burst into laughter at my bold declaration, her eyes twinkling with mirth. "Well, you don't have to, you know?" she replied between giggles, shaking her head at my blunt honesty.

I finished my drink and set the glass down with a determined nod. "I think I do," I admitted, my voice firm and resolute.

Rosa grinned approvingly. "That's my girl," she said with a proud nod.

"See you tomorrow, Diaz!" I said, giving her shoulder a friendly pat as I left the stool and made my way towards his table.

As I approached, Jake supported a knowing smile, his gaze unwavering from mine, completely focused on me, completely tuning out the random story Boyle was spewing about.

"Hey guys," I announced as I reached the table, "I'm not feeling really well," I admitted, but my tone lacked any hint of tiredness or distress making Jake's eyebrows perk up at my unconvincing excuse. "So I'll just head home, I think I can still catch the last train." It was a statement crafted with a specific purpose in mind—a subtle cue for Jake to follow me. So, I waited for the response I knew was coming, and Jake didn't disappoint.

Quickly drowning his drink, he stood up from his seat. 'No, no, train, come on!' His fingers motioned in an approaching gesture. 'I'll take you home.'"

"Oh…But!" Boyle exclaimed, "But you said you'd take me home…"

We stood in silence for a moment and watched as Boyle's expression shifted from confusion to realization in an instant. Standing up from his seat, he enveloped Jake in a bear hug, practically lifting him off the ground in his excitement. "You know what? It´s a great night! I guess I'll take a stroll along the river," he exclaimed cheerfully, patting Jake on the back before waving us goodbye.

The car ride had been silent so far, the only sounds filling the air were the gentle hum of the engine and the soft background music playing from the radio. Despite the lack of conversation, I couldn't shake the feeling of Jake's eyes on me, his scrutiny palpable, and I was keenly aware of the warmth creeping up my neck. Glancing over, I found Jake stealing glances in my direction, a small smile playing on his lips.

"Eyes on the road, Detective," I said, my finger lightly pushing his chin in the direction of the road, a playful smile tugging at the corners of my lips.

His grin widened, but he quickly turned his attention back to the task at hand, his fingers tapping lightly on the weel. "So, you weren't feeling well, huh?" Jake quipped, "Must be that sudden wave of 'I-can't-resist-Jake syndrome,' huh?"

Raising an eyebrow, I turned in my seat to face him slightly. "Oh, you think you're so funny, don't you?"

"It's a burden, really," he added with an exaggerated sigh. "Having to be this funny all the time,"

"Sometimes I wonder if you're compensating for something with all that humor."

"Oh, please, like you're not secretly enjoying every moment of it." He let his head fall back sligthy as he let out a troathy chuckle. "I couldn't help but notice how your eyes kept wandering over to me tonight. Got a little crush, Y/n?"

"Please, Peralta, don't flatter yourself. I was just admiring the artwork on the walls" I remarked with a sly smile as I leaned closer, my arm resting behind his seat and my breath brushing against his cheek. "You, on the other hand, were really pushing it out there. I mean, could you have been more obvious?"

"Oh, come on," he glanced over at me. "You can't fool me with that excuse. I know you were totally checking me out."

"Maybe…" I admitted, my voice barely above a whisper, a playful glint in my eyes.

"Of course you were," he replied, his hand moving from the steering wheel to rest lightly on my thigh. "And can you blame yourself? Of course not. I mean, look at me."

"Please, Peralta, you're not that irresistible." I scoffed while looking down at his hand, trying to maintain my composure despite the growing warmth between my legs.

"Oh, I beg to differ," he murmured as his fingers now traced gentle circles on my thigh, "Admit it, Y/N. You've been dying for me to touch you like this."

My breath caught in my throat, and I simply let out a chuckle as I slumped back against my seat. "You're trouble, you know that?" I shook my head, a mixture of amusement and exasperation in my tone, as I let my gaze drift out the window.The familiar facade of my building stood tall against the city skyline as the car gently came to a stop.

"Yeah, guilty as charged," he murmured as we stepped out onto the sidewalk.

With a coy smile, I glanced back over my shoulder. "You know that if you're guilty of something, you shouldn't be confessing your crimes to a cop."

"Well, lucky for me, Detective, you've been off the clock for..." He glanced at his watch as he trailed closely behind me, "...3 hours and 38 minutes now.

"I might be off the clock, but I can still cuff you, Peralta," I said, tapping the handcuffs at my waist.

As I turned the key and my fingers fumbled with the locks I heard him inching closer. I could feel the warmth of his body as he pressed against my back, with gentle precision, he lowered his head, and I felt his breath grazing the nape of my neck.

"Me, in cuffs, at your mercy?" His lips brushed against my ear, sending a shiver down my spine. "Oh, but wouldn't that be the highlight of your night?" His voice was low and filled with playful suggestion.

With a soft laugh, I finally managed to open the door, turning to face him, my heart pounding with anticipation. "Are you projecting, Peralta?" I countered as I met his gaze, slowly backing away, inviting him in as he approached me at the entryway.

He quickly stepped in, closing the door behind him with a soft click. The room felt suddenly smaller, warmer, with just the two of us. As he reached me, he circled his arms around my waist, pulling me closer "Mehh, maybe just a little,". His fingers deftly undid the zipper of my leather jacket, and his eyes didn't tear away from my chest.

"Like what you see, Peralta?" I quipped, letting my hands meet his own on his chest.

"Yeah," he chuckled as he leaned in to press a kiss on my collarbone. "You changed your curtains, didn't you?" He added playfully, his breath warm against my skin.

"Oh yeah?" I slowly started undoing the buttons on his shirt. "I can't believe you´d noticed that."

As we reached the sofa, his hands guided my jacket off, the leather slipping down my arms with a subtle force. Our eyes remained locked as the leather pooled at my feet.

I gestured with a tilt of my head for him to take a seat, and with grin he complied, his fingers skillfully undoing the remaining buttons of his shirt. I couldn't help but admire the way his muscles flexed under the fabric as he discarded it to the side. Then he eased onto the sofa, spreading his legs and letting his arms rest casually on the back of it, lightly tilting his head back.

As I removed my pants, he drew in a deep breath, his gaze unwaveringly fixed on me. Straddling him, I rested my hands on his shoulders, sensing his firm grip on the back of my thighs for stability. With my knees on either side of him, I gradually eased myself onto his lap, the heat of his chest pressing against mine, still covered by the random top I threw on this morning.

"No perps today?" he joked, his hands settling on my ass while his nose lightly brushed against my chest, inhaling my scent. "I kind of enjoyed the audience."

I shook my head as I leaned down to grab his chin, urging him to meet my gaze. "Just you and me, Jake," I murmured against his lips. "What do you think?"

"Well, Y/n," he whispered, "I think you should really kiss me."

"Yeah, I should," I nodded, but just as our lips were about to meet, I pulled back slightly. "Or maybe I'll just leave you hanging," I teased as I leaned back, keeping him at arm's length.

Jake's eyes widened in surprise. "You're playing dirty now, huh?" His hands cupped my flesh forcefully as he pulled me forward, spreading my cheeks slightly and pressing me against him. The sudden movement elicited a gasp from my lips, feeling the subtle grind of his crotch against mine. A soft moan escaped me as I surrendered to the satisfying friction rocking my hips against his bulge.

"Maybe," I teased once again, leaning in close before pulling back again. I intensified the grind of my hips as his hands moved to my shoulders, sliding the straps of my top down, the fabric gathering around my stomach, exposing more of my skin to his hungry gaze.

"You're killing me here," he protested as his fingers traced the delicate lacy edges of my bra.

"Oh, but where's the fun in making it easy for you?"

As his head fell back against the sofa, a deep exhale escaped him, a mix of frustration and pleasure. Seizing the opportunity, I pressed my lips against his neck, relishing the shudder that ran through him, accompanied by a low sigh of pleasure. My hand lightly closed against his throat, keeping him in place as I continued to kiss upward, tracing the line of his jaw with eager lips.

"You're driving me insane," he growled, his voice thick with need. Grabbing me by the nape of my neck, he pulled me into a kiss.

As our bodies pressed together, he skillfully unclasped my bra, freeing my breasts to his eager touch. His mouth descended upon my right nipple, and as he sucked and nibbled, I couldn't help but grind against him with more force.

I tugged on the hairs at the back of his head, urging him closer, craving more of his touch. His fingers trailed down my abdomen, teasing the hem of my panties before boldly slipping beneath them.

I gasped as his cold fingers met my warm skin. "Fuck, Jake," I breathed out, my voice trembling with desire.

"Oh, my name sounds so good when you say it like that," he confessed, his fingers moving slowly against my clit. My head rested on his shoulder, and his fingers continued to explore my soaked folds, "Yeah, just like that, doing so well," he praised as he lightly brushed my entrance, slowly dipping his middle finger inside of me.

With a desperate urgency, I moved my hands to his sides, tugging at the belt loops of his jeans. "Off, off," I managed to say.

He nudged his hips forward, lowering his jeans and boxers just enough for his cock to spring out. I immediately took him in my hand, stroking him lightly as a pornographic moan escaped his lips.

His hand then moved my panties to the side, allowing me to guide him against my clit before lining him with my entrance. Slowly, I lowered myself on to him, feeling every inch of him stretching me as he filled me completely.

His right hand met the back of my neck once again, pulling me into a kiss, as his left cupped my ass with force, aiding me with the up and down movement of my hips.

God, you feel incredible," he groaned against my lips, his voice husky with desire.

With a breathless laugh, I whispered back, "You're not so bad yourself."

A playful chuckle escaped him "Always got something to say, don't you?" He teased, his hips rising to meet mine with eager intensity.

My head fell back, overcome with pleasure, as the familiar coil of ecstasy began to build in the depths of my stomach. "Fuck, don´t stop.". His movements remained steady, his hand reaching out to play with my clit, intensifying the pleasure coursing through my body. "God, Jake... it's... it's too much," I gasped, desperation evident in my voice as my hands clung to his shoulders and arms for support.

"Oh, I can't fucking last with you sounding like that," he admitted, letting his forehead rest against mine.

"Then don't," I whispered, my voice barely audible amidst the sounds of our heavy breathing and the pounding of flesh. His pace quickened, pushing me closer as I arched my back. "I´m cumming.. Oh.. Fuck"

A moan escaped his lips as he watched me with intensity, his eyes tracing every contortion of my face as pleasure surged through me. I felt the wave of bliss crash over me, my body trembling with the force of my release.

In that moment, I could tell he couldn't hold back any longer. "Do it," I urged, locking my gaze with his and giving him a reassuring look.

"You sure?" His eyes searched mine, seeking reassurance.

I nI nodded eagerly, feeling my body tremble as I sensed him pulsating inside of me. The sensation of him nearing his climax, his moans reverberating through the room, was intoxicating and overwhelming in the most delicious way imaginable. As he released into me, I let out a satisfied sigh, capturing his lips once again.

We remained intertwined, his arms wrapped around me protectively, as his cock still throbbed gently inside me. His fingers traced soothing patterns on the small of my back, and I nestled closer to him as his lips found their way to my forehead, planting a tender kiss.

"You know? I hate when you´re right," I whispered, my voice soft against his skin.

"About what in particular?" He chuckled.

I smiled against his neck, feeling a warmth spread through me. "About... this," I confessed, lifting my head slightly to meet his gaze. "That I'd been missing out."

"Well, lucky for you, Y/n, we still have plenty of time to catch up,"

--XX--

Tagg: Hi my loves, I took the liberty to tagg everyone who liked my post about writing smut for peralta - Hope you enjoy <3

@haikyuuhoee @1dilflover @Airu_wu @gingersnap126126 @Gingersnap @her5 @bellaabee @bestnottoask @Taylorswiftsboatinglicense @tortelliniturtle7 @sabage101 @izzyyyyy777 @dilflover-3 @yomamacrusty @Outsiderslover @vintagevickyy @spencerreidmyst3ry @ikea2-0 @jj170623 @icybluefox @sxphiarz @syrk @raven-kroe @longlostishmael22 @joonbum @angrygirlloudvoice-blog @mandarinmoons @apple-dilf-shake @readingblogsstuff @m1keyj @luciferdelivery @hunter-ameliaredstone @laciruelaa @iloveslashers @bellaaggg @reiderrambles @strapsforyoonie @spencerreidmyst3ry

#jake peralta smut #jake peralta x reader #jake peralta x you #b99 smut #b99 #jake peralta #andy samberg #andy samberg smut #jake peralta imagine #jacob peralta #smut #dilf smut #brooklyn nine nine

[clementinegreye]

false god

spencer reid x fem!bau!reader

summary: it's never a good idea to reminisce about a relationship, especially one that ended with betrayal left you with a permanent scar

word count: 1.2k

warnings: angst, no happy ending, major character injury, talks of general CM related violence and murder (nothing graphic), jeid you squint but its not endorsed lol

a/n: wrote this in an hour when i was feeling sad. its not proof read and i lowkey don't love it but whomp whomp

She always thought that the ground looked so far away just after take-off. Everyone below looked like specs of dirt that you had to really focus on to see. How insignificant everything looked compared to the vastness of the sky above. The illusion of importance shattered by the cover of clouds.

Pulling the blind down she sat back in her seat, headphones drowning out the noise in her head. The jet was silent, too focused in quiet contemplation of the reading material in front of them.

Her body instinctively leaned slightly to the left, seeking the comfort it once found in his embrace. But the illusion was shattered, and she knew that no matter how much she wanted to, she could no longer lean into the familiarity. She pushed her body towards the window, forcing her eyes out to the clouds.

Her thoughts, once filled with his presence, felt unmoored.

Now she could focus wholly on work. But the space that thoughts of him once filled was now left behind and filled with a silence that echoed through her. She was alone with the sky, the clouds, the vast expanse of the world below, and her thoughts.

His scent still lingered, he’d spent so long in the seat next to her that it must have melded with the fabric. A mix of pine and the cold winter morning air. She closed her eyes, a single tear escaping, sliding down her cheek. She was left with nothing but the ghost of his presence, a cruel reminder of what once was.

But now, the seat remained cold and empty. Even the scent of him, hugging her senses, used to be a source of comfort, was now a bitter reminder of the fallout between them. She hugged herself as if trying to fill the void as vast as the sky.

She forced herself to breathe, each inhale a sharp reminder of the love that was no longer hers. But it felt different now, hollow and cold as if the warmth he once provided had faded.

You see, Spencer Reid had broken her heart, and he’d done it easily.

Spencer Reid had chosen to protect someone else over her.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

The takedown was supposed to have been simple.

She turned her head slightly, the dust from the room seemed to have uprooted and created a cloud of mist. Morgan looked like he was running towards her. Why was he running towards her? Why was she on the ground? Why did everything feel so cold? It was the middle of July, she’d been warm in her Kevlar vest. Why were her fingers so so cold?

‘Agent down!’

The words echoed in her ears. It was as if the fog cleared and she tried to sit up, pain lit up her body like electricity before going numb. Suddenly everything seemed so silent. The world shifted, she could feel the cold concrete on her back as clearly as if it were in her bones.

Morgan was fast, it must have only taken him seconds to get to her. Which was odd, she’d been standing next to Spencer, but she couldn’t see him from her line of sight. She tried to force herself up again. only to be met with Morgan’s strong hands pushing on her shoulders.

‘No, don’t move.’ She turned her head to the side and through the haze of what was happening she saw something that made her eyebrows furrow in confusion. Maybe she’d hit her head. She must have hit her head.

Spencer was standing in front of JJ, his whole body poised like a shield protecting her. His arms around her shoulder, her hands gripping the front of his vest. Then the confusion unravelled like a loose thread, tugged on.

Spencer had moved to protect her. He’d left her side to protect JJ from the Unsub’s shooting. He’d actively moved further away from her to go and stand in front of JJ. But he wasn’t in love with JJ. He was supposed to be in love with her, so why had he gone out of his way to protect JJ? Was he in love with JJ?

They’d always been close, she knew that. But this? This felt more than friendship, you don’t dive in front of just a friend instinctively if the supposed love of your life is right there in the line of fire. Surely, your instinct is to follow your heart, is that what Spencer had done? Had he followed the true line of his heart?

She wanted to ask him why. Why he had done this? But her voice had deserted her, her throat drowned in icy silence. She felt the darkness creeping in, wrapping around her like a shroud.

The pain of the betrayal was raw, every nerve in her body seemed to buzz with it. She felt like a marionette whose strings had been cut, left to crumble under the weight of her realisation.

Morgan was next to her, holding her, placing his weight on her torso, he was lit up in a golden halo and his eyes looked like they were gleaming with fear and un-spilt tears.

‘Where’s the damn medic?!’ He shouted backwards in what must have been the general direction of the team.

‘It’s five minutes out.’ The voice was level, in charge. It must have been Hotch, but her eyes were getting too heavy to check.

She wanted to tell Morgan to stop looking so scared, to assure him she'd pull through like always, but the words died in her throat. Her breath hitched as a new wave of pain washed over her.

'Hang on,' Morgan pleaded, 'just hang on.'

She could hear Spencer, his voice sounded panicked, high pitched and his breathing thready. He was muttering something that sounded like an apology and a lot of cursing or praying to God. She couldn’t tell.

She wanted to reach out, to comfort him, but the strength had left her body. The edges of her vision were blurring, and the last thing she heard was Morgan's desperate plea echoing in her fading consciousness.

'Stay with us,' a voice commanded, each word punctuated with a raw desperation. But the darkness was too inviting, too persistent. And as the world around her faded, she couldn't shake off the sinking feeling that something irrevocably had changed.

----------------------------------------------------------------------

The hum of the engine lured her out of her memory. Maybe it was her fault. She’d loved Spencer like it was breathing, had worshipped at the altar of his love, only to find it empty. It was clear he hadn’t done the same, that convenience was simply his reason.

The false god she had created of him had fallen, shattered into pieces. The truth of his mortality, his flawed humanity, had never been so palpable. The feeling was both liberating and terrifying.

She looked out at the sky and the world below, the vast expanse seeming to mirror the emptiness within her. Emptiness echoed in her ears, filling her with a sense of loss that was almost unbearable.

The scar below her left collarbone throbbed beneath her shirt, it could almost be mistaken for heartache.

#spencer reid x reader #spencer reid #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid imagine #criminal minds imagine #criminal minds #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds fic #criminal minds angst #spencer reid angst #spencer reid fanfiction #cm fanfiction #spencer reid x you #spencer reid x self insert

[roo-bastmoon]

Off My Chest

Rant about Hybe under the cut. I give you my word I will try to post a majority of positive content, because the world (and my mental health) doesn't need more negativity, but sometimes you just gotta vent.

Folks, if you've known me for a hot second, you've realized I am a Jimin-biased Jikooker... but I am OT7, and I sincerely love and support BTS.

I believe Jimin is a grown man who can advocate for himself and I believe Jungkook absolutely supports and adores him, whatever their relationship status is.

I always try to accentuate the positive and avoid online drama and negativity as much as possible, but I need to get this off my chest.

I will never be gas-lit into believing that the way Jimin was treated in solo era was fair, or equitable, or even made any kind of business-sense. I've genuinely tried to entertain other people's points of view and listen to people who claim to have industry expertise, but...

I will never forget his mail being tampered with four times, his leaked insurance information, denial of more music videos, overlapped solo release, only 9 days of promotion, split title tracks, no radio or play-listing, no bio for his Spotify for months, no restock of his single CD for months, hundreds of thousands of frozen and deleted sales, millions of culled streams, shady articles in WeVerse and Billboard, insulting dialogue in In the Seom, failure to submit to RIAA certification for months, only a paywall documentary on WeVerse, zero official acknowledgement of his Hot 100 #1, 1 billion streams on Spotify, or wins for The Fact, MAMA, and two Webbys, plus broken in-ears, anemic little balloons and a sad background tarp as decorations for his fan events… and the company telling him how doing more would just be impossible.

I compare all that to the push that other members and other groups got, and I know it just isn't true. It wasn't impossible.

Hell, Jeon Jungkook put in more effort to promote Jimin’s work and showed more respect for Jimin as an artist during his at-home lives than that whole company did, which honestly makes no sense from a profit standpoint.

I will never forget it, and I will not entertain arguments that say I’m a solo or an anti or jealous about it. I have eyes.

I am not out to shade any other members nor put forth any conspiracy theories. I simply want all our boys to get everything they justly deserve.

And yes, other members have suffered mishaps and neglect, but nothing of this scale, this consistently. It baffles me, I cannot understand it, and I'm done trying. Something strange was going on behind the scenes and we may never be privy to the details.

In trying to put this awful feeling behind me, I will say I am elated that Jikook are serving together and can support each other. I am glad there will be a Jikook travel show. I'm continually impressed with all of Jimin's success (in the military and professionally) despite all odds. I will always love and support all of BTS with my full heart.

And I sincerely hope the company has been taking notes and course-corrects for PJM2, even if it rubs some higher ups the wrong way if they had a different vision. Considering Jimin’s unique talents and his amazing star power—even his ability to bring Paris and New York to a screaming standstill just for the opportunity to see him exit a car—I would hope the company will “do their best to promote all labels and artists without discrimination” going forward.

But what happened truly sucked, and I needed to get that off my chest. I am not interested in further discussion or debate. I am now going to do my best to shift my focus and energy on to the things I want to manifest, instead of the things that enrage me.

So let me end on a positive and hopeful note: I put all my trust in Jimin, who signed a new contract with Hybe and who unfailingly adores all his members. There can be no love without trust. I will always do my best to trust BTS.

But I'm watching carefully. For Jimin and all our boys.

Love, Roo

#jimin #jikook #park jimin

[kai-anderson-whore]

Hi!!! Could you do an imagine where y/n is the first serious girlfriend he’s had since Emma so she’s insecure and she gets hate because she’s a good bit younger and has to deal with the fact Evan and Emma still work together on AHS so their fans still want them together. Lots of fluff with a touch of smut? Thanks!!!

Insecure of the ex (Evan peters x fem reader slight smut)

Warnings: hate comments, doubting a relationship, being compared to an ex, smut, heavy kissing, p in v sex nothing too major, fluff

Word count: 1,4k

A/n: in my flop era xoxox

•¤❅¤•.•°˚˚°•..•°˚˚°•.•¤❅¤•.•¤❅¤•.•°˚˚°•.

The dim light lit up the room the coffee cup in your hand, your phone in the other. Evan your boyfriend of two years sat on the other side on the room watching tv. You had just posted a picture of you both on instagram it was a picture one of your friends took when out for dinner you were cuddling into Evan, his lips on your head hugging you close with the caption "here's to two whole years with you my love, and many more 💕💕".

You loved the picture one of your favourites. You received nice comments from your close friends and family congratulating you both on the milestone. But you couldn't help but notice the negative comments. "They won't last any longer", "I miss Emma", "he's probably going to go back with Emma", "she's so much more younger than him probably only with him for the money", "god I hate her #evan&emma". You knew you shouldn't have let it bother you but it did.

Sure you were a couple of years younger than Evan five years to be precise but you weren't with him for his money. You loved Evan you both met at a convention and hit it off from then on sure it wasn't too long after his split from Emma roberts. He still worked closely with her in ahs which did make you feel unsettled but you learned to get on with it since Evan loved working on the show despite his ex girlfriend being there too.

But the comments on each post didn't stop you from getting into your head. You wondered why he was with you, was he just using you to get over Emma and you were just sticking around to something that means nothing to him. You didn't know. Every time Evan was filming for ahs you knew Emma would be there and with their history you didn't know if there was still feelings or not between them. Their fan ship them more than you and Evan it was just something you learned to become accustomed with.

You glanced over at Evan his eyes focused on the screen in front of him. "What time is it?"you asked you already knew the time it was past midnight already but you wanted him to notice. "Twelve fifteen- oh happy anniversary babe" he says after pulling out his phone getting off his seat giving you a kiss on the lips. But you couldn't help but feel hurt at the fact you had to tell him.

"What's this?" Evan asked his eyes glued to your phone. 'Shit' you thought you forgot to lock out phone so he wouldn't see all the comments. "It's nothing Evan really" you tried to dismiss but Evan wasn't having it. "Come on let's see the post it's obviously us" he smiled taking your phone from your hand his smile grew at the picture remembering the day clearly.

With a short scroll of his thumb his boyish smile dropped seeing all the horrible hate comments you were receiving for the first time. Evan's brows scrunched in confusion reading all the comments. "How long has this been going on for?" He asked the tears pricked your eyes uncontrollably you felt like you couldn't breathe.

"Almost the whole of our relationship, I delete the comments so no one can see but there's so many of them" you started to sob. "Sometimes I think they're right what do you see in me Evan, they're obsessed with you and Emma I can never compare to her" you started to sob. Evan just placed your phone down engulfing you in his arms.

He smelled of your favourite cologne hints of wood, tobacco and citrus notes it was all so comforting to you. Your tears staining his white t-shirt but Evan didn't care about that all he cared was making you feel better and putting a stop to these comments. "Listen to me" he started cupping your chin so you can meet the gaze of his brown eyes.

"They might be obsessed with me and Emma and can't get it in their heads we're history. But I'm obsessed with you okay your the best thing that's happened to me what I see in you is a beautiful, smart, independent woman who loves me just as much as I love her and no dumb comments will change that you can't compare to Emma because your better and I mean that". His words made you cry more but a smile crept on your lips which Evan didn't hesitate to kiss.

"I love you so much Evan I'm sorry for-" you tried apologised which Evan placed his index finger to your lips shushing you. "Don't apologise you have nothing to be sorry for it's natural to get upset and let these comments get to your head and I know me working with Emma still isn't necessarily helping but your the only one for me". you could see the hurt in his eyes Evan hated seeing you upset. Nodding your head you whisper a small "I'll stop apologising" to him before burying yourself back into his arms.

"I'll put a stop to these comments I'll log back into my instagram account and say something I promise" he added kissing the top of your head. You still felt shitty these comments really have took it's toll on you. "Hey look at me" you looked up at Evan again who placed a kiss on your lips, "I - promise- I'll- sort- this" he said in between kisses. His lips continued to kiss you your hands roamed his hair. His body pushing you further down on the couch slotting himself between your legs.

A giggle escaped your lips Evan took those thoughts away a smile once again invaded your lips, "there's that beautiful smile" he sighed happily. His lips peppered themselves along your neck, your head moved to the side slightly giving him more access to you. "Happy anniversary babe" he mumbles against the hot skin of your neck. "Happy anniversary" you sigh in satisfaction completely forgetting about those comments you knew they shouldn't matter all that matters is you and Evan. 

His hand roamed your body slipping under your sweater feeling every curve. His lips continued its work along your neck and collarbones. "Evan" you hummed desperately, Evan knew what you wanted and wasted no time in giving you it helping you out your sweater and sweatpants leaving you in just your undergarments. Evan then proceeded to remove the remaining articles of clothing from his body, you took the time on getting completely bare for him showing him every curve and shadow of your body.

"How did I get so Lucky with you" he smiles his eyes drinking all your beauty before him. He slotted himself back between your legs your arms wrapped around his neck, your legs hooking along his waist. Evan gave himself a few tugs before lining himself up with your entrance. Your body quivered as he started pushing into you slowly.

Your eyes rolled back in pleasure as evan thrusted into you in a slow passionate way. Your arms still wrapped around his neck bringing him down to meet your lips. Your lips moved in sync swallowing each others moans. Wanting to be more closer to him if that was even physically possible. “I love you so much” he whispered against your swollen lips bringing his back upon your own.

Soon enough you felt that knot form within you. Evan picked up the pace a little more bringing you closer to the edge. Your moans got louder as you came undone beneath Evan. He stopped for a moment drinking you in a smile forming on his lips, “god you so beautiful” he thought out loud coming down from your high Evan started to chase his own high coming undone on top of you.

You both felt limp laying on the couch not saying anything just trying to collect yourselves. Evan had his arm slung over your frame a small smile on your lips completely forgetting about the comments. “I’ll sort all that out I promise” he broke the silence nuzzling his head into the crook of your neck placing a lazy kiss there. “I know thank you Evan” you sighed tracing your fingertips along his back.

#evan peters #american horror story #james patrick march #tate langdon #kit walker #ahs asylum #evan peters x reader #kai anderson #jimmy darling #kyle spencer #austin sommers #evan peters x y/n #evan peters imagine #evan peters requests #evan peters fanfiction #evan peters x you #evan peters fluff #evan peters smut #evanpeters #ahs x reader #ahs fanfic

[superfurytamago]

Every Japanese comedy reference in Jujutsu Kaisen chapters 240 and 241

EDIT: Added one more reference to Audrey that I completely missed out when I was writing this post. Putting my self-proclaimed Japanese comedy otaku title to shame!

I was a Japanese comedy otaku way before I got into manga and anime, which is why I get way too excited whenever I spot Japanese comedy references in other forms of media. Granted, the plot is totally coherent even without knowing the references, but please indulge me as I find myself a rare opportunity to talk about Japanese comedians. All English panels are sourced from Manga Plus and Japanese panels are my own digital copies.

Preface about Japanese comedians

Japanese comedians usually form duos called "combi" in Japanese. Some may form trios or even quartets, but duos make up the overwhelming majority. Solo comedians are becoming more common, but like Takaba, most if not all of them had started out as a duo that didn't work out over time.

Nabe Nabe Entertainment and Pony

Reference to Watanabe Entertainment, a major entertainment agency in Japan. The most famous comedian group under Watanabe's management will be the comedic trio Neptune, and the above panels reference them indirectly as well.

Another talent management agency mentioned is Pony, which is a reference to Sony Music Artists Inc (SMA). Yes, they manage comedians as well lol. Agencies have distinct styles of management, which eventually shows in the type of comedians they manage. Kenjaku assumes that Takaba is with Pony because SMA has managed to propel an impressive number of solo comedians to fame despite the comparatively smaller scale of management. They also lean more slapstick than the "cooler" forms like skits and monologues. In fact, Takaba reminds me of Koume Dayū:

Laughing Dog? Vocabula?

Both Laughing Dog (Warau Inu) and Vocabula (Vocabula Tengoku) were incredibly popular variety TV serial programmes that Neptune appeared in during the 1990s and early 2000s. Takaba admires Neptune, which is why he chooses to sign with Nabe Nabe rather than Pony, even if the latter may actually manage him better.

Kenjaku wondered for a second why Takaba didn't cite Vocabula as the reason he admires Neptune, because Vocabula was the one that gave Neptune their shot to fame, and they absolutely reached superstar levels of fame during the time. Laughing Dog came later, when they were already established as household names.

The reason why Kenjaku walked back on it with "I guess that's obvious enough" has to do with the nature of the two programmes. Laughing Dog was a sketch comedy programme like Chappelle's Show, while as the name may suggest, Vocabula focused on wordplays, puns, and parodies. Comedians were voted based on how they performed the jokes. Here's a short clip of Neptune on Vocabula:

While here's a sketch from Laughing Dog (the second, third, and fourth green leaves members are Neptune lol):

Of course Takaba was inspired by Laughing Dog, "I guess that's obvious enough".

Backbone! My backbone!

An actual short gag (ippatsu gag or lit. one-shot gag) by Haranishi from the duo FUJIWARA:

It's not the first time Akutami has referenced an actual short gag in the series. Perhaps you may remember Itadori's unfortunate reunion scene at the sister school goodwill event:

This is a gag from Kojima Yoshio:

You have my condolences, Itadori.

Comedians and auditions

Kenjaku is dressed like a stereotypical TV producer here. This dates back to Japan's asset price bubble; during which, tying a cardigan over the shoulders was a staple look among TV producers and directors. In this scene, Takaba is auditioning like he would for a part in a variety TV show. Struggling comedians like Takaba often audition for variety shows that showcase a series of comedic skits or manzai. Pass the audition and you get a spot to perform on national TV.

Comedians and theatre

Most comedians who don't get their big breaks on TV spend a large part of their careers in small theatres. A typical comedy show consists of several groups of comedians performing their skits or manzai, and the theatre will hand out feedback forms like the above. It seems like Takaba used to go by the stage name Pinchan.

P-1? C-1?

The fictional C-1 is a reference to an actual long-running competition M-1 Grand Prix, while the fictional P-1 which Takaba mentioned earlier is a reference to another competition R-1 Grand Prix. M-1 is restricted to manzai performed by two people or more, while R-1 is open to solo comedians only. There are several important annual comedy competitions in Japan. Winning these big-name competitions is usually the ticket to fame for many comedians, but even then it may not work out for everyone.

Idol shows

It has become customary to have established Japanese comedians host Japanese girl groups TV shows, and I pretty much agree with Takaba's take on why. If you're a fan of idol groups like Morning Musume, AKB48, Nogizaka46, or Idoling!!!, then you would be familiar with Japanese comedians like Ninety-Nine, Ariyoshi Hiroiki, Bananaman, and Bakarhythm.

By the way, Takaba was watching TV while eating cup noodles after the above panel. The lines are from a well-known manzai performed by comedy duo Audrey. This particular joke with them going "hehehe" at each other is a staple in their early manzai:

In fact, take a closer look at the apartment that Takaba lives in. It's based on the actual apartment Kasuga (pink vest guy on the right) used to live in, named Mutsumi-sō. His shabby apartment and extremely thrifty lifestyle had been featured in many variety TV shows in the past. He lived there for more than 20 years, and the apartment was actually quite a tourist spot for fans of Audrey. Kasuga's Japanese Wikipedia article even has a photo of it as seen below, which is what I think Akutami referenced from. The interior is largely based on Kasuga's apartment as well:

Bonus Japanese comedy!

Akutami has taken inspiration from actual Japanese comedians in the past. In chapter 153, two of the spectators look eerily like comedy duo Sandwichman:

And how can we forget Ken, the fellow comedian who gave Takaba advice in chapter 146:

He's based on Kendo Kobayashi, and if you've seen images/clips of Akutami dressed up as Mechamaru, that was when he went on Kenkoba's show:

Wow that was long. Thanks for indulging the squealing Japanese comedy fan in me!

#superfurymusings #owarai #jujutsu kaisen #takaba fumihiko

[henrysglock]

The Mirror Isn’t A Mirror At All. It’s Something Else.

Now, this single screenshot is part of a far larger (possibly multi-part) post about El's entrance into NINA and the different versions of the rainbow room we're show.

In short, even the "identical" shots aren't exactly the same. For example:

And bits we think are simply shot in a mirror:

Aren't "mirrored" at all, once you compare the surrounding items:

(Not to mention the color grading swap...okay, I guess!!)

So many of these objects change so often and for no apparent reason that I've actually had to make a spreadsheet to keep it all straight (which will likely go in the bigger/more comprehensive post).

What I want to look at in this post, though, starts with this particular shot, where we get to see the same part of both rooms at the same time with the mirror.

Do we see it? No? That’s okay, it took me a full year to catch it.

Let me point it all out:

But wait. That's not how mirrors work. Even if the kids change a little, actors and fabric folds aside...the objects should at least be identical, right? Right?

Unless it's not a mirror at all. Unless it's something else.

With the context of the second, conjoined rainbow room, in mind:

I'd like to bring up another piece of weirdness this all ties into.

The Lighting.

Do we see it?

No? Still totally fine, this was something I didn't pay much mind to until Em pointed out to me a few days ago.

I, at least, went "Huh. That's not how wall mirrors typically work, alternate universes aside. Typically the shadowed side is toward the mirror, unless there's a new light source".

Which of course there is:

This shot is lit with light coming through the mirror.

So it's either that we've got originals and doubles in the same universe, just on opposite sides of the mirror (à la "Us"), or it's this kind of deal:

The window between universes, which ends up spiderweb-cracked just like our weird mirror.

In one universe exists one baby El, and in the other universe exists the other. Same with Teen El, same with the Henwards.

So with one room being more brightly lit than the other, I'm left wondering if it's not light from the other universe coming through a window between universes:

Which would also tie in with this "through the mirror" bullshit they pull in the massacre sequence...which I spoke about in more dept in the post I've linked here.

Long story short: The mirror is not a mirror at all.

A brief closing note: This all casts some major speculation on the baby we see in the second set of flashbacks, whose gown doesn't match any of the gowns we see in the Henward-El fight.

#st nina project #timeline theory #mirror fuckery #st set design #st props

[lurksunderthebed]

Major Spoilers MWIII (1/5)

Thoughts on Ghostsoap interactions in mwiii. With pictures for extra spice. BEWARE SPOILERS ⚠️⚠️⚠️ PART 1

ON THE IMPORTANCE OF NAMES

So apparently, the Kill or Capture mission wasn't the first time Soap or Ghost have met before.

There's a flashback mission in mwiii set 4 years prior to mwiii. In it, they go through makarov's previous capture in verdansk.

This is set before the events of mwii 22 but most likely after the events of mw 19. If I remember correctly, the verdansk missions were set after mw19 and had the first references to modern soap and ghost.

Shepherd was still considered a good guy in this and he's working with Ghost on overwatch. Soap and Price rush to stop Makarov's terrorist plot and capture him alive. It culminates in Soap and Ghost interacting on coms and in the helicopter with makarov.

I find this all very interesting, cause that must mean they worked together at least 4 years prior to 2022 mwii events. (Though prob even earlier considering that there was no introduction, by shepherd or Price. Just a simple "Ghost will cover you on heli".)

Alt text for all pics for more clarity/dialogue.

And Ghost's interactions with Soap with comparisons across 4 years ago, mwii and mwiii is so telling in how impactful the Alone mission was for their relationship.

The makarov mission flashback showed how cold Ghost was to Soap. Along with the classic 09 mask, he didn't even register Soap at all aside from calling out kill shots and bluntly informing Soap of enemies. Didn't mention his name, his rank, anything at all. Soap is just another faceless soldier to him for all he cares.

Which makes mwiii more juicy cause Ghost in mwiii pretty much only uses Johnny when referring to Soap. It's a total tonal shift. In mwii he used it sparingly and then in mwiii, it's Johnny this, or Johnny that. Been a long watch of the current playthrough but I could only remember him saying Soap and sergeant very sparingly in comparison.

It also speaks of how much the writers wanted it contrasted when the flashback verdansk mission is set right before the first SoapAndGhost mission. You get to compare and contrast Ghost's warmth from his coldness. Ghost cares. It's obvious in how his jokes ring, his snark and the nickname for Soap. It's so different from old ghost with the 09 get up.

↓↓↓

All three of these moments is Ghost and Soap communicating and checking on each other. The game writers knew what they were doing here damn it.

And after the flashback mission where Ghost and Soap are riled (heh) up over the makarov mission 4 years ago, GHOST ASKS SOAP IF HES WITH HIM (to go on a risky mission with no backup) AND SOAPS JUST LIKE YOU DONT EVEN NEED TO ASK.

Lit don't forget that no one outside of Ghost ever refers to Soap as Johnny. Even Price, whose name is John also (and is referred to it by Laswell) uses John when he's speaking to Soap personally.↓

The only one to use Johnny and is allowed to use it is Ghost. 🥹😭😭😭

onto part 2 - staring and jokes

#cod mw3 #SPOILERS #be warned #cod mwii #call of duty modern warfare #ghostsoap #cod mwiii #simon ghost riley #simon riley #john soap mactavish #john mactavish #soapghost #mw3 spoilers

[ladyknight33]

Severus Snape, The Lost Lily, and A Certain Kind of Courage

Not enough credit is given for the type of courage that allows an insecure boy to stand in enemy territory and apologize. It is the same type of courage that has allowed him to behave as a spy in the most dangerous situations of the story. The books inform us that Severus has insulted Lily multiple times, perhaps indirectly, when in conversation because of his constant acquaintance with Slytherins who referred to her as a Mudblood. In order to maintain relations with his Housemates, he needed to use the same vocabulary otherwise they would ostracize him along side the rest of the school. The books also say that Lily forgave him frequently for these transgresses and even defended him to her friends. Because of these references, she might not have had the slur directed at her from Severus’s own mouth. Only in passing in referring to the Muggleborn population. This could explain her outrage at the callous behavior Severus gave her following the “Worst Memory” incident and why she never forgave him.

To better understand why Lily took the derogatory slur so harshly, one needs to understand why Severus would have lashed out in such a horrid manner. Many readers insist that there is no forgiveness for this behavior, but circumstances pushed him into a no win situation.

First of all, the Marauders attacked Severus unprovoked. (This isn’t say that Severus never attacked first, but in this instance he was the victim) James Potter’s attacks were less harmful in the physical sense, but emotionally they caused embarrassment and lasting mental damage to Severus from the inability to defend himself.  Second, Lily attempted to call James’s off no less than six times (HP OotP, Ch. 28). Fueling Severus’s embarrassment to have a girl defend him yet again when James actually relented. 

“There you go,” he said, as Snape struggled to his feet again, “you’re lucky Evans was here, Snivellus –“

“I don’t need help from filthy little Mudbloods like her!”

Lily blinked. “Fine,” she said cooly. “I won’t bother in the future. And I’d wash your pants if I were you Snivellus.” (HP OotP Ch. 28)

There was a moment hesitation in Lily’s response that suggests surprise and shock, inferring that Severus had never referred to her directly as a Mudblood. Lily not one to be insulted returned in kind which no doubt destroyed Severus’s heart. His one friend and defender had abandoned him. This was likely the moment when Severus knew he had made the most grievous error of his life.

This error was fueled by years of influence by Slytherins such as Malfoy, Nott, and Mulciber. Severus had grown accustom to the slur’s constant use in casual reference and was expected to use the term without hesitation. By this point in his schooling years he was probably having to hide his interest in having Lily as a friend publicly in order to stay friends with his Housemates. 

The stress and embarrassment of the situation in such a public manner likely did cause Severus’s vocabulary to slip out the insult. He needed to appear as the consummate Slytherin in the eyes of his racially bigoted friends and he had to appear self reliant in terms of the stereotypical male who does not seek protection from women. Most all cultures have this image of a strong male and seem to indicate that needing a female to fight his battles is considered weak. Given the home life of Severus Snape he likely learned this behavior from a strong willed Tobias Snape. 

While no one is free from fault, circumstances, stress, embarrassment, shame and anger do cause people to say and do things they would otherwise not do. This combination of emotions does cause people to act irrationally. Teenagers are the best examples of people making irrational decisions. Everything from trying illegal drugs, drinking and driving, and defying a parent because of a simple misunderstanding are examples from real life. Granting another chance to people who do make horrible decisions while stressed is up to the victim of the attack. In this case, Lily decided that there could be no more chances.

Now with the emotional state of Severus Snape explained, it is time to talk about the courage it took to stand in front of the Gryffindor Common Room demanding to see Lily. He threatened to sleep there which meant he did not care about the rules or how the students of Slytherin would laugh at his decision. At that moment in his life Severus cared about nothing more than apologizing and seeking forgiveness for what he had done. Admitting fault is a difficult thing to do at the best of times, carrying with it the shame and humiliation all its own. Doing so publicly takes great courage. This is the courage of doing what must be done. 

Severus Snape, who is not like by many people, influenced by hatred and bigotry, and faces ridicule for his choices, is able to swallow his pride and do what he knows is right. Argue that this is only because he does not want to loose Lily Evans and that would be correct. At this point in his life he has very little support in the social structure. He needs all the friends he can find. At this point in his life sexual interests have not been revealed. There is no evidence that he sought after Lily for anything other than a friend. 

The courage it took to stand there and listen to Lily reject him while trying to apologize is breathtaking. This is the courage that allows him to stand before great evil and not waver. He has already felt the guilt of being unable to save what is lost. So he tries to salvage what he can. At this turning point in his life he is crying out for help but is unable to express himself. He wants to do right but his only outlet pulls him deeper into Voldemort’s grasp. With his last bridge of friendship with Lily burned, he likely had no more strength to resist the inclusion he felt with his Death Eater friends.

He still had the strength of mind to feel concern for Lily’s safety. Keep in mind that when the prophecy was first heard and reported no one knew who the child was. Severus had made the only choice he felt was left to him by becoming a Death Eater and in his mind getting even with Dumbledore by reporting the prophecy would have been high on his list of priorities. It was not until Voldemort chose his victim did anyone know who was in danger. Severus probably felt extreme guilt at passing the information, but he could not have known that Voldemort would choose the Potters as the most dangerous. 

To his credit, Severus had the courage to ask the Dark Lord to spare Lily’s life. Many people, including Dumbledore, ask why ask for only the woman’s life. The reason is clear. Voldemort had chosen his victim and if Severus Snape had ask for the family to be spared then he would appear to be a traitor and destroyed. He could get away with asking for a woman he had loved since childhood. Voldemort knew of sexual desires and assumed Severus asked for a woman because he desired her. This is where the sexual definition of love started to develop. Severus never claimed it was true only that Voldemort made that assumption. Severus allowed the assumption to stand because it shielded him from suspicion. 

When he begged Dumbledore for Lily’s life, Dumbledore accused him of only caring about her. Given the known history that would be a safe assumption. Of course Lily is Severus’s first thought. She was his first and only best friend. There would be some resentment over James Potter putting her in danger. But notice that it was not Dumbledore who insisted on protecting the family. Dumbledore asked “why did you not ask Voldemort to save the whole family?” which is a ridiculous thing to ask the man trying to kill said family. Severus was the one to volunteer the request to save the family. Yes, he wanted Lily safe and understood that to do so would require saving her family. He would not see James and Harry killed for the sake of one person.

Severus made a dangerous choice in seeking out Dumbledore. He is shown to be afraid during the confrontation, starting out by begging, “Don’t kill me!” Severus knew this meeting could easily end in his death or imprisonment and Lily was more important than either. His courage was fueled by fear at this point, but he still knew what had to be done and was willing to face the consequences.

During the Voldemort’s second rise to power, Severus hung between trust and traitor. He walked in two worlds where people refused to believe he was truly on their side. Constantly having to put up with the comments and insults. He bore this as best as his bitterness allowed him. But when faced with the task of killing Dumbledore, the courage needed to complete it was overwhelming. From Severus’s own memories it is known that he did not want to do as ordered. As shown with Draco Malfoy, killing is not so easy a task when one’s heart is not evil. This again is the courage of what must be done. Not because it is right, or because it is glamorous. But because it is the only option to reach the end goal. 

Traditional heroes would have balked at killing a friend who would otherwise die a horrible death. Readers curse Severus for this action, one among many. If this horrible decision had not been made, then the ability to protect the students at Hogwarts and pass along vital information to Harry at the right time would never have come to be. 

No matter how furious the Order of the Phoenix was at Severus’s actions, they needed him to do the dirty work of spying for them. With the information he brought them, they could then be the heroes everyone expects.

#Harry Potter #Severus Snape #lily evans #albus dumbledore #order of the phoenix #The worst memory incident #character analysis #Comparative lit major at work #Essay #comparative literature #unpopular opinion #james potter #the marauders #voldemort #old essay #still think it is true #written after HP Deathly Hallows #Harry Potter and the Order of the Pheonix #Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince #Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows #the half blood prince #deathly hallows #courage #acts of courage #analysis of courage #sirus black #draco malfoy #snape #malfoy #me trying answer questions

[laurelwen]

Texts in Like Minds: Alex's Essay (deleted scene)

It has only recently come to my attention that a deleted scene exists on some versions of the Like Minds dvd (not the US version sadly). Thanks to @general-theory-0f-relativity, I learned about and was able to see this scene, and I really wish it had been included in the final cut for reasons I will explain in another post. The scene is in their lit class, and it involves the teacher handing back graded assignments. Alex's essay title is clearly legible despite the low quality of the video, and I immediately had some thoughts about it in relation to his character. Unfortunately, the video quality and the shots involved do not allow us to read the title of Nigel's essay other than to determine that is definitely a different topic. This tracks with my own experiences in lit classes and as an English lit major in college; we generally were given a list of potential essay topics to choose from. Based on those two pieces of information, I draw the conclusion that Alex intentionally chose the topic of his paper.

The title: "Compare and contrast Dulce et Decorum Est, Anthem for Doomed Youth, and the Before Agincourt speech from Henry V"

Alex’s essay topic is incredibly common in English literature classes, essentially pitting two opposing ideologies against each other.  The Agincourt speech from Shakespeare’s Henry V is constantly quoted and paraphrased in media, and chances are good that most of you will have heard (or heard of) at least a part of it.  To sum it up, this is a speech being given by King Henry V to his soldiers as they prepare to engage the French in the Battle of Agincourt in 1415.  Facing a dire situation in which they are badly outnumbered, the king is trying to find some way to boost the morale of his men and encourage them to enter a battle in which hope is small and many of them will certainly die.  He does this by appealing to their sense of courage and honor, painting a picture of the glory they will earn for their heroic deeds and suggesting that they will be long remembered and highly praised by their countrymen.  These ideals are used by leaders and nations to lead the reluctant into the horror of battle: honor, renown, courage, brotherhood, duty, and loyalty to a cause or state.  It is the ages-old refrain sold to the common man–that to die in battle is actually a desirable thing, for it proves one’s character and masculinity.  

The two poems mentioned were both written by WWI poet Wilfred Owen, famous for his castigation of war and of the madness of that conflict.  “Dulce et decorum est” refers to a quote from Roman poet Horace: Dulce et decorum est pro patria mori - "It is sweet and fitting to die for one’s country."  This sentiment is the same as that espoused by Henry V in his pre-battle speech, but Owen calls out the idea as inherently false, deriding it as propaganda meant to lure men into a pointless war.  In this poem, as in “Anthem for Doomed Youth” and the rest of his war poems, Owen vividly depicts the brutality and misery of war. The lived experience of the soldiers undermined the false promises of a glorious and honorable struggle.  The horrors of WWI would forever traumatize an entire generation, and Owen himself would die only one week before the end of the conflict.  

As a side note, it is worth mentioning that Owen met poet Siegfried Sassoon while recuperating from shell-shock in 1917, and it is now believed that they were romantically involved despite attempts to straightwash Owen.  Sassoon encouraged and helped Owen with his writing, including both poems referenced here, and he was the one who collected and published Owen’s works after his death.  (Further reading on the gay war poets.) It's unlikely that Owen's gay relationship with Sassoon was covered in his class, but we know Alex was an extensive reader who pushed outside the boundaries of what he was taught. He could have discovered this information on his own.

While the comparison itself is extremely common in English lit classes (a quick Google search will show you a number of essays on this exact question), I find it a particularly interesting choice for Alex.  As someone who questions authority, rebels against rules, and rejects conventional ideologies, it is fitting that he would be drawn to write an essay examining this conflict between ideal and reality.  Knowing as we do his feelings regarding the hypocrisy of the Church and the causes and wars they engage in, one suspects he likely ascribes to the same sentiment as Owen–rejecting the propaganda of patriotism and sacrifice in the service of a Cause sold by those with self-serving interests.  I tend to think this character trait is one of the main factors influencing his interactions with Nigel–on one hand, he is reluctant to support any notion of a higher purpose or cause, but on the other, he is intrigued by a cause which paradoxically espouses iconoclasm - attacking or assertively rejecting cherished beliefs and institutions or established values and practices.

As a small side note, both actors' filmographies include WWI movies: Tom Sturridge in Journey's End and Eddie Redmayne in Birdsong. After his starring role in Birdsong, Eddie became interested in WWI and has been involved in projects honoring and remembering those involved in that war. Here's a video on FB of him reading another of Wilfred Owen's poems, "Asleep". I had a past life/WWI AU idea based on the story of Owen (Nigel) and Sassoon (Alex), so discovering this scene was absolutely chef's kiss perfection for me.

#i love drawing the connections can you tell? #like minds #nigel colbie #alex forbes #tom sturridge #eddie redmayne #murderous intent #like minds 2006 #like minds analysis #nigel colbie x alex forbes #like minds au

[mangocustard16]

Scholarly Sparks✨Part1 boo seungkwan  x reader

| synopsis: Seungkwan and Y/N have always been known for their intense rivalry in academia. They clashed in class discussions, exchanged heated arguments, and even took pleasure in getting under each other's skin. Little did they know that this passionate competition would eventually lead to something more profound.

| pairing: academic rival!seungkwan x gn!reader

| genre: fluff

| warnings: none

| w.c: 620

Seoul University's lecture hall was a battleground, and within it, Seungkwan and Y/N were the undisputed champions of academic sparring. They were two stars, equally brilliant and equally determined, shining fiercely in the intellectual firmament. The air was charged with tension whenever they crossed paths, their debates fueling late-night discussions among their peers.

Seungkwan, with his sharp wit and unyielding arguments, was the embodiment of eloquence. Y/N, equally formidable, possessed an unwavering dedication to her beliefs. Their exchanges were a symphony of opposing ideas, and their rivalry was the stuff of legend. In whispered disagreements, they challenged each other's theories, dissected each other's perspectives, and pushed the boundaries of their intellects.

As they sat in the lecture hall, their hushed dispute echoed through the air, drawing the attention of those nearby.

"The structural complexity of proteins far outweighs the significance of nucleic acids in biomolecules.", hushed Seungkwan.

Y/N interjected, "That's exactly where you're wrong, Seungkwan. Without nucleic acids, the instructions for building those intricate proteins wouldn't even exist."

"But proteins carry out the majority of cellular functions. They're the workhorses of biology!"

"True, but without nucleic acids to store and transmit genetic information, life as we know it wouldn't be possible.", Y/N argued back.

Their argument delved deeper into the world of biomolecules, each counterpoint fueling their passion for the subject.

"Biomolecules are like puzzle pieces that fit together perfectly.", said Y/N leaning back into her seat.

"I don't agree with you."

"Nobody asked you to."

As the semester progressed, Seungkwan and Y/N's intellectual rivalry only grew more fervent. However, they found themselves drawn together by their shared discontent with Professor Lee's grading practices.

"Can you believe Professor Lee's grading? It's as if he has a personal vendetta against us.", said Seungkwan almost slamming his books on the table.

"I know, right? It's like he's not even afraid to show how biased he is", Y/N agreed.

Their frustration was palpable as they sipped their coffee in a dimly lit campus cafe. A knowing glint in Seungkwan's eye hinted at a deeper connection forming.

"Maybe we should team up and expose his grading bias.", Seungkwan suggested

"You're suggesting we work together?"

"Only if you can handle it."

"Challenge accepted."

Their alliance against Professor Lee marked a turning point in their relationship. Late nights were spent dissecting rubrics, comparing grades, and strategizing their next move. With each meeting, their competitiveness evolved into camaraderie, and their disagreements turned into friendly debates.

Seungkwan had discovered Y/N's favorite study spot, a quiet corner tucked away from prying eyes. It was a prime location for focused reading, and Y/N cherished it.

Driven by a mix of mischief and curiosity, decided to stake his claim. He took up residence at her cherished spot, just to see the irritation flash across her face. Something about it made his heart beat faster.

Y/N walked into the library, her eyes narrowing as she spotted Seungkwan comfortably settled in her corner. She approached him, a mixture of annoyance and bemusement on her face.

"You're here again, in my spot?", she said.

"Just to see you annoyed.", said Seungkwan in his teasing tone.

"You're unbelievable."

Their rivalry had transcended the classroom and was now spilling into every aspect of their academic lives, including the halls of the university library.

Days turned into weeks, and the library became their battleground. Seungkwan's presence in Y/N's favorite spot was a persistent thorn in her side. She tried sitting elsewhere, but it was never the same. The thrill of their library wars added a unique dimension to their interactions.

One evening, as Y/N approached her corner only to find Seungkwan once again occupying it, she couldn't help but smile.

"You're relentless.", she said almost grinning.

"And you're stubborn. But that's what makes this so interesting.", said Seungkwan shrugging his shoulders.

Their playful banter and the unspoken challenge in their eyes spoke volumes. Their library wars had become a peculiar courtship ritual, a way of acknowledging each other's presence and pushing the boundaries of their rivalry to new heights.

As they competed for space amidst the hushed whispers of knowledge, little did they realize that they were inching closer to a truth they were yet to admit to themselves—an undeniable attraction that went beyond rivalry, a connection that was growing stronger with each exchange of words and each shared smile in the library's quiet corners.

One sunday afternoon, the campus grounds provided an unexpected backdrop for Seungkwan and Y/N's rivalry.

Y/N had decided to enjoy the rare sunny day and was engrossed in a novel while sitting under a tree, the gentle breeze ruffling the pages of her novel. Seungkwan, with a mischievous glint in his eye, couldn't resist the opportunity to challenge her even in this idyllic setting.

"You really can't escape reading, can you?"

"Seungkwan? What are you doing here?", said Y/N surprised to meet him on a sunday.

"Just thought I'd take a break from the library and enjoy some fresh air.", said Seungkwan

"Fresh air? Or just another chance to challenge me?", teased Y/N

"Both, perhaps.", chuckled Seungkwan.

Their banter had become as much a part of their interactions as their shared passion for knowledge. They fell into a comfortable rhythm, their conversations a blend of rivalry and camaraderie.

"You know, Seungkwan, you're like a persistent rain cloud that follows me around."

"I prefer to think of myself as a source of intellectual stimulation.", Seungkwan defended

Their playful arguments continued, the campus grounds providing a serene contrast to their lively exchanges. The trees overhead offered shade, the soft hum of distant conversations filled the air, and the sun cast a warm glow on the pages of Y/N's book.

"You really love reading, don't you?", he whispered.

"And you, linguistics."

"It's fascinating, isn't it? How language shapes our understanding of the world.", said Seungkwan lying down on the grass his eyes searching yours.

Their rivalry had taken on a different flavor in this tranquil setting. Amidst the open space and the beauty of nature, they found themselves sharing more than just academic challenges.

"It's strange, Seungkwan. We argue so much, yet I look forward to our debates.", Y/N admits.

"That's because it's never dull with you, Y/N."

Their conversation deepened as they discussed their academic aspirations and their dreams for the future.

As they sat on the campus grounds, the playful rivalry between Seungkwan and Y/N was juxtaposed against the peaceful surroundings. It was a moment of unexpected connection, where their competitive sparks blended with the warmth of the sun and the serenity of the campus, leaving them both with a sense that perhaps there was more to their relationship than academic competition.

<Part 2>

#mango.writes #seventeen #svt #svtcreations #seungkwan #boo seungkwan #seungkwan x reader #seungkwan x you #seungkwan x y/n #seventeen fanfic #seventeen scenarios #seventeen x reader #seventeen x y/n #seventeen x oc #seventeen fluff #seventeen ff #seventeen fanfiction #carat #svt carat #seventeen carat #love #fluff #soft #university

[ficthots]

Special Delivery

A/N: Tooth rotting fluff (smut *ahem, daddy kink*). Have you ever wondered what Josh would send you as he traveled around the world? Yeah, me either. As always let me know what you guys think and as always enjoy! (P.S. to save you some time: Clair de lune=Moonlight; Lune=Moon)

Warnings: Smut, 18+ content, DNI if you are under 18!

Word Count: 8.3k+

Being in someone's thoughts is one of the most telling signs of how a person thinks of you. There is a chance you can be entirely despised by said person and in their thoughts of you they are anything but friendly. A friend's thoughts of you can refer back to fond memories you share with one another that puts a smile on their face, recalling silly times spent together. However, many believe that nothing can compare to a lover's thoughts of you.

They think of you in the most affectionate ways, more than anyone else. Thoughts wander off about how delicate you looked that morning, still asleep while they got ready for work. How your eyes crinkle closed as you laugh at their stupid joke that no one else would ever understand, but of course you did as you wiped at the tears pooling in the corners of your eyes, struggling to catch your breath. The twinkle you got in your eye as you listened to them speak so passionately about their aspirations and desires. After being together for a bit of time, you would be able tell what the other person was thinking at a social gathering just by the way they set their mouth, eyes stealing glances at one another, silently asking if it was time to go.

A lover's thoughts couldn’t even begin to compare to how your soulmate thought about you. They would watch you as you vacuumed the house on a lazy Sunday morning and view you as if you went and pulled the sun up from the horizon just for them. Admiring you from the shared bed as you quietly hummed along to the music playing lowly in the background, applying your skincare for the night, knowing they had never seen a more gorgeous creature and never would. 

These thoughts would never cease, even if they were across the world. Which right now, your soulmate was. 

Josh was chasing his dreams with his brothers, playing for millions of adoring fans around the world, and you couldn’t have been happier for them, for him. You firmly believed that he had been picked from the Earth just for you. Mother Nature had carefully crafted each aspect of his dazzling personality to be the missing puzzle piece made to complete you. 

Your souls were meant to find one another and dance through life with him by your side. He made you feel like he would craft the world to your liking, doing whatever he could to see you smiling and happy, molding it to whatever you desired that day. 

When he was gone for a majority of the year, it was difficult, but you knew that his thoughts were riddled with you as he did the most mundane tasks for the day. Just like when you brushed your teeth in the morning, you thought of getting a new toothbrush that evening when you were going grocery shopping and to pick one up for him, too, knowing he was due for a new one. 

You shipped it to wherever he was in the world that week and he called you, the brightest aspect of your day as his face lit up your screen, holding the toothbrush like it was the most precious gift he had ever received. 

“Now, darling, how did you know I needed a new toothbrush? Look at my old one,” he would grab the old and flash it on the screen, bristles sticking a million different directions, tossing it in the garbage as he clutched the new one in his hand. “You just always seem to know what I need.”

Josh’s thoughts about you seeped into every section of his day that they could. He was a creative, artistic, and affectionate man who always wanted to show you how much you truly meant to him, even if he was trapezing around the globe. 

The first package arrived at your door only a couple weeks into the international aspect of their tour. It was gorgeously packaged, the simple brown box hidden beneath a map of the country they were in, a large heart drawn around the city where he had found the items in the present. Twine wrapped around it, a pressed flower glued below the bow. 

You called him immediately, shock and giggles flowing from you as he instructed you to set your phone up on the counter so he could watch you unwrap it. Leaning your phone against the vase on your kitchen island, he had the perfect view to see your reaction as you opened it. 

“It’s so pretty, sunshine. I don’t want to ruin the packaging,” you moved the box around as you spoke, sipping from your wine glass, only having the dim lighting on in the house as he sat on his hotel balcony, the sunset starting to illuminate him in a golden glow, somehow making him more breathtaking. 

“Don’t worry, I took a million pictures of it. Rip it open,” you took your bottom lip in between your teeth as you gently pulled the twine, setting it off to the side and began carefully pulling the sides open. “Baby, I said rip it!” His laughter flowed from how gentle you were being, but you shook your head, stopping your movements.

“Absolutely not! You spent a lot of time on this and I want to keep the map and flower, plus I can reuse the twine,” you stuck your tongue out at him as he groaned, falling back into his chair as you pulled the box out from the opened wrapping end. 

As you peeled the tape from it, white tissue paper with gold splattering covered the items inside. You rummaged through, fingers feeling a cool metal brush your fingertips as your brow furrowed in confusion. 

You removed the item and gasped, eyes going wide at the beautiful gold trinket box that sat in your hands. The ornate design traveled around the box, a singular moon sat on the center of the lid and as you set it on the counter you opened it and saw a small card sitting in the crushed velvet interior, another small box sitting beside it. 

“Open the other box first, lune,” your heart skipped a beat as you did. Inside sat a gold heart locket and when you opened it, two small silhouette photos were on both sides. The one on the left was of you and the one on the right was of him. 

You opened the card and saw the efforts of clean handwriting from him on the gorgeous stationery he obviously purchased just for this, knowing how much you would appreciate the effort. 

To adorn as a reminder that my clair de lune has my heart with her wherever we sit in the world and a safe place to store it while she waits for her sunshine to reappear 

The delicate chain hung between your fingers as you looked back at your boy, a blush creeping across the apples of his cheeks. A knock sounded at his hotel room door, signaling it was time for him to go play for whatever city awaited him that night.

“I love you, lune and when I see the moon tonight I will think about your glow illuminating me.” You didn’t know how he was able to make you feel like a lovesick puppy, but he did. Every time you spoke to him, he did. 

You sat on your shared couch that night, staring at the beautiful gifts he had gotten you, struggling to figure out how to show him just how much this meant to you and you smiled, an idea bouncing into your mind. 

The next day you were fishing through the spare bedroom and you found the case in the back of the closet. One of his older camcorders sat in your hand as you checked the batteries and SD card before you made a run to the camera shop you frequented with your love when he was home and purchased the missing card.

When you got home you grabbed the tripod to set it up facing your vanity. It was a risky game balancing it as it was not meant for this camera, but when you got the perfect shot, you celebrated quietly, going to finish getting ready. 

You put on one of the sweaters you knew were his favorites and ensured the look was exactly what you wanted. All that was visible was your face from the tip of your nose down, focusing more on where you would be placing the necklace, but that the trinket box was visible in the shot.

You gingerly opened the box, seeing that the necklace was laid exactly how you wanted it to be, a few rings, and a pair of earrings placed intricately next to it. Removing the necklace from the box you brought it to your neck, clasping it with ease, making a show of laying it correctly on your chest, and then closing the box. 

You applied a spritz of perfume to your neck, brining your lipstick to your lips and applying a small amount, setting it back down and smiling in the mirror softly.

You stood and grinned, spending the remainder of the day editing the footage. The vintage look was something Josh would adore. Home videos were one of his favorite things to make with you, using a variety of different video options, but he would be amazed at your skills here. It wasn’t up to par with what he was doing in your mind, but you knew he would adore the effort nonetheless. 

Just a couple weeks later another package sat on your doorstep as you arrived home from work. You picked it up, bringing it inside as you sat down in the same spot as before, but as you were about to call him, someone rang the doorbell, having you go back to the door with a small, frustrated sigh. 

“Hi, I have a flower delivery here,” your eyes bugged out at the beautiful bouquet that the woman held for you. You quickly thanked her, bringing the bundle of florals inside and setting them on the counter next to the package. He knew how retched your day had been and was doing everything in his power to make it better. 

Another stress riddled day at work had you missing Josh more than usual, wanting nothing more than to come home from work and fall into his arms. This was one of the hardest aspects of your relationship and while most of the time you could handle it, today was simply a different day.

He had loaded your coffee app for you that morning after hearing about the day you were going to have from you the night before, ordered lunch to your office knowing you wouldn’t be taking a lunch break today, and bombarded your phone with texts all day about how much he admired, loved, and missed you. 

As you dialed him, his beaming smile graced your screen. “Well, if it isn’t the most gorgeous, breathtaking, beauty this world has ever known and will ever know, calling me, of all people,” you laughed at his words, heat creeping up your neck. He was in his red jumpsuit, letting you know you only had a few fleeting minutes before it was time to share him again.

“How’re you doing, my darling? Did the package get there?” You tiredly sighed as his gaze softened on you. “Yes it did, I can’t wait to open it. I miss you, a lot, sunshine,” your voice cracked as you sniffled, eyes dropping down as tears threatened to escape. 

His sad tone carried through as he spoke to you. “You have no idea how badly I want to be there with you right now. I miss you, too, baby,” as he continued a knock came from his dressing room door, interrupting him. 

“Josh, you’re on in one!” The voice yelled through the door and your heart ached as he squeezed his eyes shut, jaw clenching in frustration. “You need to go, honey. I love you and I’ll talk to you tomorrow,” you wiped at your wet cheeks, Josh’s gaze boring into you. 

“I’ll call you tomorrow, clair de lune. Open the package tonight, okay? I love you,” he kissed his camera as you laughed wetly at him, hearing the loud beeping of the ended FaceTime call echo into the quiet house. You leaned back against your chair, looking at the package that sat on the counter waiting for you.

This one was just as beautiful as the one before. It had brown paper wrapped around it, a plethora of dried flowers decorated the outside, all the way around. One thick, emerald green ribbon wrapped around it, another thinner gold one laid on top, tied together in a beautiful bow. 

Being just as careful as the first time, you removed the box, seeing it was significantly larger than the first was, but lighter. 

Peeling the tape back, the same tissue paper greeted you and you couldn’t fight the smile that took over your face. In bubble wrap was a ceramic white teacup with a gold trim on the rim of the cup and around the border of the matching plate. The handle curved into an intricate design on the side of the cup, a small, singular chocolate sat right in the middle.

Below the cup were three records. You gasped as you saw the titles of them, shock coursing through you as you placed them on the counter. “How did he find these?” 

You saw another card sitting at the bottom of the box and smiled, the same attempt of calligraphy sat on another stationary card. 

To drink your morning coffee, because you despise tea, but love teacups, and listen to the sound of my love for you, darling

Eyes brimming with tears for the second time that night you hopped off the chair and went to the record player that sat in the living room, placing it on the turntable, eyes closing as the music filled the space. 

The next morning you moved the record player to the balcony, getting the camcorder as you went to set up the shot. You wore his favorite night slip he had gotten you as a birthday gift one year. You had eyed it in a store window for months, not being able to justify the price, but he knew you too well. 

After your usual farmers market perusing and brunch to follow, you two strolled past the shop and your face visibly fell as you saw it was gone. The next weekend you opened the bag he had handed you and the silk poured into your hands, the delicate stitched flowers rubbed against your fingertips. You jumped onto him, shocked he had noticed how badly you wanted it. 

Now you wore it as you wandered out to the patio for the video, teacup in hand with your coffee, as the sun began to peek out for another day. It wasn’t the same sunshine he basked you in every time he was around, but for now it would do. The profile of your face was visible as you sat in one of the outdoor chairs, bringing the cup to your lips and sipping the scalding liquid. 

In the background, the gentle notes floated through the air of one of the records he had picked for you, the gold necklace laying on your chest. 

Life continued on regularly for the next couple of weeks, nothing out of the ordinary or spectacular, but you were out of the small rut you had been in. Daily talks with Josh had your spirits high as your heart longed for him to be near again, but knowing that was still many months off from now meant being content with what you could have.

The next package arrived on a weekday morning, torturing you as it sat there waiting for you to get home. You anxiously texted Josh, making sure it wasn’t too valuable to be outside for the entire day, fear of it being taken riddled you. 

You hadn’t heard back from him by the time your lunch break rolled around so you quickly made your way home. A breath of relief fell from you as you saw it was there waiting for you. As you made your way inside with the heavier box, your phone rang. 

“Lune, I’m so sorry, honey, soundcheck ran so late today, we were having all sorts of problems. Did you come home for lunch? The camera went off. Is everything okay? Are you feeling alright?” you wedged the phone between your cheek and shoulder as you sat the box on the counter.

“I did. A package arrived from you and I was so worried it was going to be taken, so I came home to put it inside,” he chuckled at you as he spoke a little louder, wherever he was going was growing noisier as he moved. 

“Okay, love. I just wanted to make sure you were okay. I have to go, but I’ll call you tonight. I love you,” you said it back, ending the call as you eyed the package. 

The same brown paper adorned the outside, but this one had doilies wrapped around it, a postcard from the city he had purchased whatever the present was sat on the front doily, a sage green ribbon tied on the front. 

You chewed on your lip, trying to justify opening it without Josh, but you slapped your own hand as it went to pull on the long end of the ribbon. “No, you have to wait.”

You somehow dragged yourself out of the house and back to work, but the entire day you thought about what would be in this one. There had been no real theme going on the gifts no matter how much you thought about it. 

When you pulled into the driveway and got home, within seconds your phone was ringing. He was dressed again, gold jumpsuit tonight, rhinestones already on his cheeks. “Ah, there she is! Love of my life. Look you’ll be proud of me,” he flipped the camera to show himself in the mirror, “I finished getting ready early to have a few more minutes on the phone.”

Your heart flipped at his words, but you couldn’t let him have the satisfaction so easily. “Wow, you mean you managed your time better tonight? You’re right honey, I am proud of you,” he scoffed at your tone. 

“You have a little attitude tonight. I will gladly take that present back that I know you’re eyeing right now if you’re not careful,” you set the phone on the counter as you sat, pouring yourself a glass of wine. 

You hummed into your glass. “Mhm, but you’re not here so really, what could you do? Punish me?” A glint of mischief entered his eyes at your words. “Tread carefully, lune,” you smirked into your glass as you stood, quickly leaning forward to show you were wearing the necklace before continuing your movements. 

Your hands fanned your face as they slowly went to the hem of your shirt. “Gosh, it’s warm in here,” you slowly peeled the fabric off, watching as his jaw clicked, seeing you in just your bra, only being able to see from the waist up. 

Letting your hands go behind your back you unclasped your bra, the straps slowly falling off your shoulders. It fell to the hardwood floor with a small clattering noise as you stretched, hands going above your head as Josh laughed darkly at your motions, your hand traveling towards the waistband of your pants. 

“Knock it off,” he spoke through clenched teeth, clearly enjoying this little show, despite his best efforts to be menacing. You stepped back from your phone letting him get a clear view of your entire body as you started pushing your pants off your legs.

“I don’t know, Joshy. It’s still really warm in here,” they pooled around your ankles, but you kicked them off, leaving you only in your lace panties that, as you turned around to pick up the articles of clothing you had removed, displayed your ass perfectly. 

“Oh my god,” he breathed out with a chuckle, almost in disbelief you were actually doing this right now. You set the clothes on the back of the couch and looked over your shoulder at him. “What do you think? Panties on or off?” 

Your fingertips dipped under the sides of them, starting to pull them down, hearing him take in a sharp breath as you slid them further down your hips, finally removing them leaving you fully nude on FaceTime with him.

“How much time you got, sunshine?” You asked him as you leaned against the back of the couch, legs parting, fingers going into your mouth to wet them before running over your nipple. Your head rolled back at the sensation, teasing yourself as you waited for him.

He was palming himself over the jumpsuit, leaving nothing to the imagination as he strained against the material. You watched him in the mirror as he took his arms out of the sleeves, spitting into his hand as he enclosed it around his cock, rubbing his tip with a harsh grip.

“Enough time. I want you to suck on your fingers and then bring them to your pussy and touch yourself for me, baby. Can you do that for daddy?” You whimpered at his words, nodding your head as you did as he said. 

Taking your fingers into your mouth, you coated them with your saliva before moving them down to your cunt. “There you go, baby. I want you to imagine it’s my hands touching you,” a breathless moan left your mouth as your fingers lightly swirled around your clit. 

His breathing was short and quick as he stroked himself. “Do you see what you do to me, mama? Have me fucking watching you like a goddamn pervert. Do you like doing this for me? Being a little attention whore for daddy? Stripping on camera for me, playing with yourself like the little slut you are,” you were choking on your own moans as you toyed with your clit, listening to him talk.

“Look at me, mama. Take a finger and fuck yourself on it,” you followed his commands instantly, removing your other hand from your nipple, feeling your slick coat your entrance as you slid it in.

“How does that feel, baby?” You whimpered as you responded to him, eyes almost crossing as you watched his hand furiously work himself, a sheen of sweat glistening off of him as he jerked off to you. 

It was dirty watching him do this in a room so close to his brothers and those that worked for them, but it made it so much better knowing that he was doing this for you. 

“‘S good, daddy,” as the name left your mouth a groan fell from him. You moved faster, adding another finger as you fucked yourself for him.

 “God, you look like a fucking vision, mama. I wish you could see yourself like this. Fucked out for me, getting yourself off before I have to go on stage. You’re close aren’t you, baby?” You nodded your head quickly, moans tumbling out of you as you felt the familiar warmth blossom in your lower stomach.

“Go ahead, baby. Cum for me. Cum for daddy,” you released as those words left his mouth, knees almost buckling as the sensation washed over you. His moans grew louder as he finished, cum spurting out onto the floor and mirror in front of him. 

His eyes never left you as you came back down to reality, his smile taking over his face. “Jesus, mama. I wasn’t expecting that tonight,” your necklace stuck to your sweat covered chest as you moved back to the counter to grab your phone, legs weak from what had just happened. 

You watched as he redressed, grabbing tissues from the table by him to clean up. “Sorry, sunshine. I missed you,” his laughter boomed as he finished cleaning up the room, a flush look taking over his cheeks.

“Oh, baby, do not apologize to me. The day I ever turn that down, you take me out and shoot me,” your laughter mixed with his as he sighed, knowing it was time to go. 

“You totally look like you just came, by the way. They’re gonna love that on the barricade,” you giggled as he rolled his eyes. “Have a great show, honey. I love you,” you kissed your camera as he did the same. 

“Love you more, lune. Open the package! I’ll talk to you tomorrow, honey,” the call ended as he walked out of the room and you felt heat rushing to your face as you thought about what you had just done for him. 

After you showered you made your way back to the kitchen, seeing the box waiting for you and you continued the soft movements you always did to make sure the wrapping wouldn’t be destroyed. 

The whiplash of going from touching yourself on video for him to the sweet gesture of his gifts had you in a laughing fit, taking a pause to not miss anything as you opened it. 

As you pulled the tissue paper back, more bubble wrap greeted you. You picked up the object, feeling how heavy it was in your hand. A gasp left you as you saw the crystal cake stand that you held in your hand. 

It had a beautiful design etched into it around the cake base and stand, a slight green hue mixing in with the clear crystal. Tea towels sat around it in the box and as you took them out, smiling at the adorable designs, a card sat waiting for you. 

To display your passion of baking that keeps me stuffed with your love and admiration

You immediately went to the fridge and scouted the contents, seeing you had everything you needed for your video tomorrow.

The next afternoon you set up the shot after having spent all morning baking a strawberry cheesecake to sit perfectly on the stand. You gently placed it onto the crystal, ensuring that the record could be heard playing in the back, necklace was on display, one of the tea towels resting on the tie of your waist high apron, and the teacup was visible to the side of the ingredients you strategically placed for the video. 

As you started recording you took a piping bag, putting one final whipped cream swirl on a slice, placing a half of a strawberry on it. You set the bag down on the cluttered countertop, spinning the stand to display the full cake. 

You smiled triumphantly as it turned out exactly how you imagined it would. Your phone began ringing as you checked the screen. Josh was trying to FaceTime you right then and you went into panic mode. You wanted this to be a surprise for him so you quickly put the camera on the counter behind you so he couldn’t see it.

“Hello my clair de lune! I’m missing you an awful lot today. We were in the city center and we went through a farmers market and all I could think of was our market days and then how we would go to brunch before coming home and cooking dinner,” he sighed as he talked, clearly feeling the heavy weight of sadness today as he thought of you. 

“Sunshine, I missed you, too. I actually went to the market this morning, look,” you flipped the camera showing him the cheesecake sitting on the cake stand. His entire face lit up as he saw it. 

“You’re using it, already! Did you get the strawberries from Janice?” You flipped the camera back around and popped a strawberry into your mouth and nodded. “Mhm. Needed to keep myself busy so I wasn’t spending the entire day moping around,” you giggled, licking extra whipped cream from your finger. 

You two stayed on the phone for hours, talking about anything and everything you could. You talked everyday so it wasn’t like there was a whole lot to fill each other in on, but you didn’t get free time like this to talk hardly ever. 

His eyes squinted as he looked at the screen as you were talking. “And I told her that we’ve never done things like that before so I have no idea who taught her that, but it just isn’t-what?” You turned around to see what he was trying to look at. 

“Is that my old camcorder on the counter?” You swallowed thickly, trying to play it cool as you answered him. “Oh yeah. One of my co-workers was asking about what cameras you have. He’s super into film things, too.” It was a total lie. That co-worker did not exist, but Josh bought it quickly. 

“That’s awesome. He and I should hang out sometime. Which co-worker is it? I’ve met all your co-workers and I don’t remember any of them saying anything about film,” you shrugged, lying through your teeth to keep the surprise from him.

“No, you haven’t met him. He’s new-ish. Started a couple months ago,” he dropped it right after that, showing you what he was having for dinner that night. You could feel the sweat pooling on the back of your neck. You hated lying to him. 

You didn’t lie to him unless you absolutely had to, but it still put a sick feeling in your stomach. It was going to be worth it in the end. 

A few weeks later, a knock blew through the house. It was a Saturday morning and you weren’t expecting anyone so when you answered and saw a delivery driver with a ginormous box, your eyes widened in surprise.

“Just need a signature on this,” you signed on his device, thanking him as he handed it off to you. You struggled to bring it inside, the sheer weight of it making your arms ache. The packaging wasn’t special with this one, knowing because of the size he wasn't able to do too much. 

There were still dried flowers in one of the corners, but after you took them off, you weren’t worried about keeping the rest of the box.

You knew calling Josh wasn’t an option today. They were in back to back interviews, then soundcheck, then the show. He had no freetime today so you took it upon yourself to open the packaging and your jaw fell slack at what stared back at you. 

A vintage, beautiful, typewriter sat in there surrounded by packing peanuts. You quickly grabbed scissors, cutting the edges of the box to be able to slide it out with ease. As the cool metal touched your hands, you realized you were trembling. 

There wasn’t a card with this one, but a small piece of paper sitting in the paper rest. 

To write whatever your imaginative heart desires and to share our love story with the world

You didn’t know what to do as you sat there staring at it, almost afraid to use it. It was in immaculate condition, knowing he must have spent a fortune to get one this old in working shape for you. 

Your hands shook as you set up the shot for the next part of your video. You moved to your desk and had it sitting in the center, papers scattered around the table surrounding it. Your tea cup sat on one of the stacks, leaving a coffee ring on it. This time you were able to make the record player visible, so you set the cover of the record against the turntable as the record played, your necklace proudly on display.

You sat down, fingertips brushing the keyboard, eyes fluttering shut as the click of the first key was made. With the camera rolling, you began quickly typing, stopping momentarily to bring the cup to your lips, letting the coffee ring be visible on the paper that read, “And So The Sun Fell In Love With The Moon.”

The packages started coming more frequently knowing that his return home was due in just a few more weeks. The next one came the following week, exactly seven days after the previous, and you were finally able to open it on FaceTime with him again.

“You know the best part of watching you do this is seeing your reaction to these. I wish I could’ve seen what you looked like when you opened the typewriter!” He was laughing as you removed the tape from the box.

“You would’ve seen me look like an idiot just sitting there staring at it. I have no idea how you managed to do that, Josh,” his laugh flowed through the air around you, your heart longing for its sunshine. 

As you removed the tissue paper you saw two antique candlestick holders sitting there with custom designed candlesticks to match. The card was tied to one and you turned it over, bursting with laughter from the message.

To ensure that my life will never be out of light so long as I have the burning flame of your love to guide me (I could’ve said something about lighting my love, but you deserve better than that)

You grabbed the box and your phone, taking them to the bedroom and setting them on your nightstand tables, stepping back to the door to show Josh where you had put them.

“It’s perfect. Now I will have some gleams of my sunlight even when he’s not here,” you smiled softly as you looked at the room, hearing Josh sniffle after. 

“I’m sorry I’m not there, lune,” you quickly backtracked, feeling horrible that you had said that in a way he would have taken negatively. “Oh, Josh, no. I didn’t mean it like that, honey,” he shook his head and chuckled as he laid back on his pillow.

“No, I know you didn’t. I’m just sorry that I’m not there.” You comforted him on the phone for as long as you could before you both were so exhausted that you couldn’t stay awake any longer. He watched you for a while as you softly snored through the speaker, not having closed the curtains and seeing the moonlight stream against your face, just wanting to feel his own moonlight again. 

The following day you finished shooting the video with the candles. You lit them, having them be the only illumination in the room as you entered the space. You sat on your side of the bed, removing the necklace and placing it in the trinket box, leaning over and blowing out the candle, setting the room in total darkness. 

Josh told you that the next package would be the last of the tour given they were due home in just seven days. You were giddy with excitement at the knowledge that so soon he would be home again. Yours to hold for as long as you wanted. Simply yours again.

He was upset he wouldn’t be able to watch you open the last one, playing a show that night and you were getting off of work late. He said it was his second favorite of them all, refusing to tell you what the actual favorite was. 

This box was the biggest of them all, a million stamps adorned the outside, all of the other wrappings meshed together into one for this. You smiled as you laid it on the floor, carefully opening it. 

You fell silent as you saw what was in this box. Dozens of antique, intricate, picture frames of varying sizes. As you removed them one at a time you were more in love with the next. The card sat on the bottom and your tears welled in your eyes, just wanting to hug him for all he’d done. 

To fill our walls with gorgeous memories: past, present, and future, of us to adorn our home with the purest and brightest love

As your eyes fell to one of medium size you immediately knew what you wanted to put in it. You went and found it in one of the books Josh kept in the spare room and put it in the frame. 

Grabbing the camcorder you dressed in his favorite dress, record playing, necklace out, teacup on the coffee table, candle on the side table, you stood on the couch and hung the frame on the center of the wall. 

You stepped off and as you walked away it came into view and you stood behind the camera, letting it linger for a second on the picture.

It was from the night before he left on tour. You two were standing in the living room, eyes shut as your foreheads rested against one another, hand holding his against your chests as you danced slowly in the room, only lit by candlelight. He had, unbeknownst to you, set his camera on the counter and had it snap a few pictures of you both, and when you saw that one, it instantly became your favorite.

Two days before Josh was home, another package was delivered. You called him as you brought it inside, laughing as he answered. “So, why is there another package sitting on the counter right now, my love?” You didn’t bother with pleasantries as his giggles came out.

“You cannot open that one until I’m home, understand?” You were of course going to wait, but you wanted to tease him a bit. “I don’t know, I’m very intrigued. Who’s to say I don’t open and then rewrap it-” before you could continue he yelled over the phone. “Don’t! Baby, I’m begging, please don’t open it, okay? You have to wait for me,” your teasing tone halted at how worried he sounded. 

“Okay, okay, I was just joking, sunshine. Of course, I was going to wait for you,” a huge breath of air expelled from his lungs as his own joking came back. “Thank you, lune. Baby, we’re about to do our last interview of this tour, so close to being home. I cannot wait. I love you,” you repeated it to him and hung up.

You sat there staring at the present, trying to figure out why the hell it had been so important to him. What did he buy? He probably blew a bunch of money and needs to be there to explain why. 

You let it go, grabbing the CD you had burned with the finished product of your little videos, absolutely in love with how it had turned out. The entire following day, you scrubbed the house, not that it was messy by any means, but to make sure everything was perfect for him.

You had lit the last candle in the living room and kitchen when the front door opened the next night. Your heart was doing somersaults in your chest, hands a shaking mess as he appeared in the doorway. 

He wasted no time, running across the room and scooping you up into his arms. They enclosed so tightly around your waist, letting your arms wrap around his neck. Sobs wracked your entire body as he held you for the first time, his entire body shaking as he tried to calm his own breathing down. 

Neither of you wanted to pull back first, but he took your face in his hands, the biggest smile you had ever seen in your life took over his face as he looked at you like it was the first time he had ever seen you. “Hi, lune,” you giggled through your tears, his thumbs brushing your wet cheeks, your hands clutching onto his shirt. 

“Hi, sunshine,” his lips connected to yours and it was like you were whole again. You had been without him for too long and you knew a piece of you was missing, but now you knew it was more than just a piece. It was half of you. 

It didn’t take long for you to lead him towards your shared room, lips never leaving each other as your breathing grew deeper, almost in disbelief that he was actually here. Your hands tangled into his hair after you removed his shirt, feeling the warmth of his body emanate against yours. 

He laid you down, lips moving from yours down to your neck, and as his fingertips touched the necklace he stopped. “Oh my god. I’ve missed you so much,” his voice cracked, shaking uncontrollably as he rested his head in the crook of your neck, tears hitting your skin.

You pulled his face up to yours and smiled as you rubbed your thumbs over his cheeks. “I’m gonna be honest, if I think too much about it, I’m worried I’ll pass out,” you spoke to him in a whisper and he laughed, resting his forehead against yours. 

His eyes shut, breathing you in for just a moment, letting you ground him back down to reality. A reality you didn’t let yourself think about too often because if you did, you would never be okay without him again. His lips gently landed in between your brows, moving down the slope of your nose, to your chin, both cheeks, eyelids, hands holding your jaw as he moved. 

It was his way of telling himself that it was real and actually happening, not a fantasy he had to envision in order to sleep at night. Your pulse beat rapidly underneath his fingertips, your breathing the sweetest music he had ever listened to, and as he opened his eyes and saw you already peering at him, reading his soul, he knew he was home. 

He kissed you again, hands gliding along your bare ribcage, having slipped your dress off on the way into the room. He left a trail of searing marks with his mouth down your chest and sternum, moving further down until he was at your sex. 

Josh wasted no time, his mouth attached to you and you cried out at the feeling. He moved his hands to find yours by your side, lacing your fingers together as he ate you out like he was a starving man and you were his only source of nutrition. 

You finished in record time, feeling his smile as you came in his mouth, your juices coating his mouth and chin, leaving them in a glistening sheen. As he came back up to you, he kissed you, tongue exploring your mouth like he never had the pleasure of doing it before. 

“Josh, please. I need you. Need to feel you,” he didn’t say anything to your begging, just let his cock slide easily into you. His face contorted in pleasure, stilling as he let you adjust, knowing you would need to after how long it had been.

His pace was excruciating, but he needed this. To feel every pulsating move you had against him, to feel every aspect of you he could. He craved this, ached for this, would beg for this for the rest of his life if he needed to. 

His thrusts were slow as your legs wrapped around him, his hands landing on either side of your head, watching you in awe as your forehead had beads of sweat forming on your brow line, looking at him like he was the entire universe to you. 

He spilled into you as he murmured about how much he loved you and how much he missed you. You felt his weight collapse on top of you and for the first time in months it felt like you could breathe again. Like Josh was the oxygen you craved to make the ache in your lungs go away and he had fixed you again. 

You both laid in bed, just staring at each other, seeing what features had changed on one another while they were gone. What you wouldn’t be able to notice on a FaceTime call. You whispered between one another, not wanting anyone else in the world to hear your conversation because it was meant just for you two.

As he handed you your night slip, he took your hand in his. “Come on. I want you to open the package,” you followed him out of the room, wrapping your arm around his, afraid to let him get too far from you.

As you approached the counter, the candles still burned in the room, casting it in a warm and soft glow, just how your home was supposed to look. “Wait, hold on,” you said as he slid the present to you. 

You walked him around the house, showing him where you had placed all of his gifts and he looked enthralled by it, like you were telling some wonderful story that you had just come up with on the spot. 

“I actually have a present for you first,” you smiled at him as you reentered the kitchen. His eyebrows shot up at that and watched as you slid the CD over to him. “Lune, what is this?” You giggled as he opened the case and grabbed his laptop from his bag. 

As the video played, his face morphed from excited to total bewilderment. “Baby, you did this?” He spoke out as it finished. You nodded your head, nervously playing with your hands as you waited for him to talk. 

He grabbed you, pulling you into a kiss as he looked back at the screen. “Clair de lune, that was beautiful,” his voice faltered, eyes getting glossy as he beamed at you. “I’m going to cherish this for the rest of my days and beyond. I’m serious,” he chuckled as your laughter boomed in the space. 

“That was amazing. Best home video yet,” he said, but his demeanor changed at the end, handing you the box that had been teasing you for days.

His hands gripped your waist, adjusting you to stand directly in front of him his chest pressing into your back, his increased heartbeat giving away that he was more nervous than he was leading you to believe.

"No card with this one. You have to listen to me explain it, okay?" You nodded in response as his breath tickled your neck.

He stood right behind you, hands on your waist, chin resting on your shoulder as he eagerly watched you open it. When you peel the box open there sits a gorgeous perfume bottle that you carefully took in your hands. 

“Josh, this is gorgeous,” he kisses your shoulder and nudges you. “I wanted you to have a custom scent that’s reserved for special days. You can only wear it on those occasions. There’s more, keep going, baby,” you smile as you pull out a bottle of wine and listen to his explanation. 

“I picked this wine in Italy. They say to save it for the most romantic night of your life. Couple more things,” he kissed your neck before urging you to continue on. You grabbed a wax seal stamp and a wax stick that was the most gorgeous shade of emerald green you had ever seen. 

His hand came down over yours, flipping the seal over to show what it was. It was in a beautiful cursive font that had the first initial of your name at the top, the sun and moon in between them, and his initial at the bottom, different twirls of them looping together, signaling you were one. 

“I had them custom make this so we can use it on stationary,” you were speechless as your eyes danced over it. “For what?” His smile grew against your shoulder, hand still resting on top of yours. “Grab the last thing in there and I’ll tell you.”

You gently placed the items on the counter and you felt your fingers brush against what felt like a tiny book. You grabbed it out and your smile grew as you looked at it. 

It was wrapped in a deep blue, gold lettering and embellishments on the binding and covers. You whispered out the title of it, letting your fingers dance across it. 

“And So The Sun Fell In Love With The Moon,” He hummed at your words, fingers moving over yours and having you open it. The inside pages had a small hole in the middle and when you saw what sat in there your mouth dropped, shaking hand covering your mouth.

“The entire time I was gone, I thought about the best gifts I could get you. It was hard to top myself because this-” he grabbed the ring out of the book, holding it in front of you, “was the very first thing I saw. We were in this beautiful country, I saw this store on a small street, and the first thing that came to my mind was how much you would want to go in and wander around. The universe was speaking to me, lune, because as soon as I went in this was there. You know, I thank the universe every single day for bringing us together? You are my inspiration, my muse, my clair de lune, the best gift I have ever received. You are my everything and I do not want to be without you again. I want to marry you. I need to marry you. Will you marry me?” 

He hadn’t moved from behind you, talking quietly into your ear as his cheek brushed yours, fingers nimbly holding the gold ring in front of you both as you softly cried as he explained it to you in the most beautiful way that only Josh could do. 

You nodded quickly, choking down your cries long enough to answer him. “Yes, of course. Of course, I will,” his smile grew as he took your hand and slid it on your finger, holding your hand out in front of you both. 

“Look at that, perfect fit,” you giggled, turning around in his arms, wrapping yourself around him as he did the same to you. “I love you, Josh,” he sighed, a shaky laugh leaving him. “God, I hope so cause you just said you’d marry me and I’m really hoping it isn’t a pity thing.”

Your laugh echoed in the room as he pulled away from you, grabbing the camcorder and setting it on the counter, placing one of the records he had sent you onto the turntable, and turning back around to face you, holding his hand out. 

“Come here, clair de lune. Indulge me,” you walked over to him, taking his hand and feeling him pull you to him. You two slowly swayed to the music, foreheads resting against one anothers, eyes shut as he hummed along to the music, the only light from the candles bouncing off the walls.

And so the sun fell in love with the moon. 

#josh kiszka #joshua kiszka #greta van fleet #greta van fleet smut #greta van fleet fan fiction #josh kiszka fanfiction #josh kiszka imagine #josh kiszka fanfic #greta van fleet imagine #josh kiszka smut #josh kiszka x reader #josh kiszka x you #josh kiszka x y/n #josh kiszka x reader smut #jake kiszka #sam kiszka #danny wagner #ficthots

[crooked-wasteland]

Hazbin Hotel Live Blog: Welcome to Heaven

Coming back I found I did enjoy the last episode far more than I did the others. It obviously suffers from who the director is, but I could still see the more competent writer underneath certain portions of the episode. This one is written by Adam Stein who was credited for six episodes of Harley Quinn, a series I admittedly do not particularly care for. I wouldn’t consider the series bad and I enjoy scenes more than the whole, but its clear that Hazbin and much of Medrano’s writing ideas are in many ways ripped off from Harley Quinn far more than Bojack Horseman. To be frank, if Medrano had stuck her comparison to Harley Quinn, I doubt she would be criticized nearly as much as she is for her writing. I know, for myself, if she had compared her shows to Harley Quinn and never once breathed in the direction of Bojack Horseman, I wouldn’t have ever been motivated to even criticize this series. I think a comparison to Harley Quinn is fair, it is an objectively worse version of Harley Quinn, but it is better suited to the style and audience of that show far and above something of high art and value like Bojack. Harley Quinn is simply not my tastes, I wouldn’t say it’s bad, but even with a gun to my head I could never in good faith consider it good. It’s better than Hazbin and Helluva Boss, but its also a fairer comparison.

Vaggie adds “gah” to her line about being a liar in the most painful way. While they obviously paid Stephanie the most, they in no way paid her enough to care. It was physically written into the script and it highlights how little the actress actively participated in the series. She didn’t even try to make it sound natural, she doesn’t care for the character she is playing and she doesn’t care whether or not we know.

It makes no sense that Angel Dust is still working for Valentino. He could just stay in the hotel and ignore Val’s calls and texts like we have actively seen him do. So it’s like he hates working for Val, does so under duress and due to a contract on his soul, but Charlie is the princess of Hell whom Valentino openly stated he was threatened by and her hotel and patrons are under the protection of Lucifer who aligned himself with Charlie and her goals…. Just don’t go? There is Vaggie, Charlie, Lucifer and even Alastor who are more than capable of handling someone like Valentino on their own, let alone as a united front. Why is this still happening?

The physical comedy falls flat. Cheri grabs Sir Pentious’ hand and it cracks and is all mangled like it is broken, but he has zero response to it. The humor requires there to be a reaction to the level of violence displayed. Having not even a minor one means the sequence may as well not have happened, and it frankly feels like an excuse to just say Alex Brightman was in the episode and have him say as many lines as possible regardless of whether or not he should. I genuinely don’t understand why this character is even in Hell. Who is he as a person? Just why?

Sera says she only green-lit the exterminations so that Hell didn’t act up, and places the blame on Adam for Lucifer getting involved. But then she just… keeps letting Adam do what he’s doing, which is what caused her to feel threatened like this in the first place. So essentially “This is all your fault because of the things you’ve done. So keep doing them.” I don’t even get why Sera or any of Heaven feels this way about Hell. I assume Sera knows Charlie’s plans about redemption, but she seems threatened by it? When in reality treating Heaven like a prize for sinners seems like a logical way of cooperating with Hell and even maintaining civil relations.

Also, can I just point out how the character designs really fail to send any sort of message. Alastor, Niffty, Velvette, Carmella and her daughters, Rosie, and Mimzy are hyper humanoid demons in a Hell where non-human designs make up a majority of the cast and the distorted, abstract and animalistic designs in Hell make sense, whereas Heaven is mostly humanoid with random demonic designs walking around. It fails to send a message as well as just makes Heaven and Hell entirely the same. It fails to really sell the idea that Heaven is in any way better than Hell. Honestly, demons should have less human designs and appear more twisted and deformed. Heaven should have prioritized humanoid figures. Especially seeing as Medrano with a heritage in Latin America and Catholicism would know that the idea of Christianity she is supposedly criticizing emphasizes that humans were made “in the image” of god and angels. It also sets up an idea of one’s soul being cleansed by having this “godly” form. Mixing in furry designs at the same rate as Hell collapses any argument for media literacy or messaging being made.

Welcome to Heaven as a song is the best song of the show thus so far. It is the One Short Day of Hazbin, a vapid superficial scene-setting song that isn’t meant to further the characters, just the plot, and it actually succeeds. I’m not amazed by it, never would i play it for enjoyment reasons, but it works for the role it plays and is the only song that does so well.

Adam is telling Vaggie her own backstory, my favorite bad writing trope.

Additionally, I thought heavenly weapons were the only thing that could harm an angel. But Lute just rips off Vaggie’s wings with her bare hands. It really confuses the world when you don’t even keep to your own rules.

In the previous episode, Charlie says the hotel isn’t “working”, this episode has Adam demanding “evidence”. The lack of understanding what Charlie is looking for when she says Progress is never defined. On one hand she says Angel Dust is making progress, but just the last episode said that the hotel wasn’t actually helping anyone. Even at the start of the episode we don’t see any change in Angel Dust, just that he’s sad. He still swears performs sex work, is rude and crude, and at no point has his situation with drug addiction been addressed in any way. I can appreciate not wishing to say someone performing sex work is committing sin. As well as the implication that how one holds themself is unimportant to Heaven. But I think everyone can agree that drug addiction and abuse is harmful to those in the addiction and those who care for them. And also, it is extremely difficult to break. Drug addiction would be an excellent analogy for sin and breaking it would work as a parallel for redemption easily. So why is it the one thing you had going for you in way of themes and a show of progress and character growth we’ve never actually even addressed. In fact, Loser Baby enables the idea that Angel Dust’s use of drugs is fine because he’s a loser anyway. Just give up on yourself. So when this episode inevitably implies that Angel has actually been making progress on that front, it’ll make no sense.

That happened a whole lot sooner than I thought it would. And it being Husk saying he thought Angel was “Better than that” really does make his whole message in Loser Baby hypocritical. Him being the one to judge others on how they cope, offloading his hypocrisy on the excuse “I’m not trying to get to heaven”, but then still performs the emotionally abusive tactic of publicly and maliciously shaming is partner into a form of compliance. And this is the romantic relationship I’m supposed to be going nuts over? Even in the case where one can argue he is doing it from a place of concern, he has never once cared about Angel’s drug use in the series. It has never been mentioned in any detail of it being harmful. It is literally placed on the same level as his hypersexuality in the song Loser Baby, which we are supposed to wave away as not being harmful because he enjoys it. The line is he “samples” every sex toy and drug. This is just the Alastor must be lying because nothing makes sense argument, except its the world that doesn’t make sense and thus nothing can be trusted and the suspension of disbelief and the act of world building is inherently gone. This isn’t even a story at this point. It is merely a bunch of drawings doing things for nearly half an hour because time is money, and Medrano likes money.

I feel the setup isn’t too bad. It’s the story of Job, which, yes, you should use the material you are criticizing if you are actually seeking to criticize it (whether or not Medrano’s is even attempting a critique on Christianity is hugely up to debate, but that’s not for this kind of post). It’s Lucifer in the Bible coming to the court of god and saying he’s been on earth observing the humans. He claims humans would never worship god if not for god incentivizing them through blessings and so god is like, “bet, do your worst”. Except, in the Bible story it shows god’s callousness. He allows Job to suffer and gives permission to Lucifer to torture this faithful man, of which when Job laments, god chastises him for doubting. This removes the negative qualities of god from the story by just watching Angel Dust make his own decisions. Which works for the idea of free will, I suppose, but the idea of free will being imagination from the last episode to now just waiting for Angel Dust to choose to conform to an idea of morals takes away any meta critique on the nature of heaven. Just saying.

Still not a fan of how infantilized the show makes Niffty.

The scene with Angel standing up to Valentino was such an attempt at an emotional reaction, and in reality it only succeeds in tiptoeing the edge of emotional catharsis. It never gets to reach that point because we don’t actually see the way that Val and Angel interact most of the time. And I’ll just say it, the Poison sequence ruins this scene. It set up this idea that Angel Dust has complicated feelings for Valentino and in many ways their relationship is just as much an addiction as the drugs. But we never see the harmful side to Angel’s drug addiction and nor do we see his complicated feelings for Val break down as he grows closer to Husk. It is unearned. And then having Charlie point blank say why that scene exists for the narrative kills any and all investment. It was there just so Angel Dust can fit Adam’s checklist. So there is no authentic emotions attached to that scene from the ground up. It is a contrivance that feels almost hateful in its existence.

Why is Adam treated as Sera? Adam was the one who made the list, but Emily contributes it to Sera. Sera didn’t even know how a soul ends up in heaven, all she says is “he was the first human soul here”, meaning she defers to him to understand. To have her be the one saying not everything is written in ink, when she openly is the first one to say she hasn’t any idea, really confuses the lack of story you are trying to tell.

So, the whole series has now confirmed it has no clue how to tell a story. “If Hell is forever then Heaven must be a lie”, so the idea of moving between heaven and hell is not a concept. Someone from heaven cannot fall to hell and someone from hell cannot enter heaven, except they can. Vaggie. Her entire existence is proof that heaven isn’t forever, so why would Hell be? If anything, Vaggie should be a spark of hope for Charlie. Additionally, the threshold of whether souls can be redeemed has nothing to do with if they can or not. Rather, it ends the same way it began. No one is in control and no one has any power one way or the other. But Vaggie being in hell, despite being an angel, who was never held in a court to determine if she should fall or not and was deemed unholy by humans, not the council of angels, just brought this whole house of cards down. In fact, the person on trial should have been Vaggie, and in extension Lute. Who is Lute to have the right to make such a call compared to Emily? Why does no one bring up this discrepancy? And having Vaggie on trial instead of an ignorant Angel Dust being critiqued without his knowledge would have been a better vehicle for not just exploring Vaggie’s past, but also the ideas surrounding redemption and banishment and the values/hypocrisy of heaven. As it stands, this episode was a waste of everyone’s time.

Adam Stein brought nothing to the table, all the same issues in Medrano’s writing are present and played out here. Adam may as well be a ghost writer as he didn’t even attempt to bring any of his own strengths to the script. I can’t say I’m surprised at this, however. It is just Harley Quinn after all.

2/10

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