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joelmillers-whore · 6 months

Text

Fuck Me Like You Mean It

summary: a miserable time out at a club turns into quite the night when you run into someone you least expected to see.

word count: 4.9k

series or one-shot

warnings: SMUT, explicit 18+, MDNI, no outbreak, dbf!joel x f!reader, dark!joel, spanking, dubious consent at times, voyeurism, exhibitionism i guess, dirty talking, language, joel calling reader a cock slut, slightly creepy joel, unspecified age gap, daddy kink, brat tamer joel, hand job for a second, manhandling, dominant joel, oral (female and male receiving), semi-public sex, bathroom sex, jealousy if you squint. as always, if i missed something, please let me know.

you are responsible for the content that you consume. please read the warnings before continuing with this fic. enjoy babes.

A/N: i am so sorry firstly for teasing you all with snippets of this one-shot and then just not posting it lol, life has been a little chaotic, to say the least and i was just feeling so uninspired to finish it (literally i do this to myself). but so many of you loved the little teaser i posted and i couldn’t just not give ya’ll some delicious dbf!joel. so, here it is.

ALSO, a huge thank you and shoutout to kylee @hellishjoel for reading and beta-ing this for me, i love you and your freakouts were so valid haha. forehead kisses.

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The pungent stench of sweat curled around your nose, setting your already overstimulated nerves into hyperdrive. Possessive hands pawed at your hips, urging you back into their body, into their growing stiffness.

Normally, you’d be all for it. The game. Going out each weekend, getting shitfaced with your best friend, entertaining men who you would otherwise have no interest in just to see them work for a moment of your attention.

But not tonight, tonight you’d had enough of it all. The handsy men, the unrhythmic and too-loud music, and just the whole played-out scene really. There wasn’t anything to get excited about anymore, each weekend blurring into the same version of the last, and the one before that.

It was boring and you couldn’t tolerate the lacklustre men around you for much longer. So, twisting out of the weak grip of the twenty-something you had been dancing with all this time, you abandoned them and your friend who reeked of desperation.

She’d hounded you all week to go out to a club, hoping to get laid, vetoing your suggestion to just get drunk and find someone at a bar. Now, you were at a seedy club downtown, getting groped from every angle by mediocre-looking men who smelled of too much Axe body spray and sweat.

The mere thought of the combination curdled your stomach, propelling you deeper into the club and all the way to the bar. You thought that alcohol might right your foul mood, your skin already pricking with annoyance at your current circumstances.

Getting to the bar, it was as packed as you had been imagining. Everyone was contending for the bartender’s attention, demanding drinks that you were sure were as watered-down as your first shot had been.

You sighed, wondering why you had let your friend talk you into coming out tonight, when it was the last thing in the world you wanted to be doing.

Lack of desire for the club had turned into plain boredom now, every ounce of your body thrumming with the longing to escape. But you’d never just up and leave your friend, no matter how much you wanted to. You’d just have to grin and bear it.

Tapping your finger along to the music, that wasn’t even good, the slow and melodic electronic music nearly putting you to sleep, you waited for your drink. Finally getting your drink from the bartender, you slurped it down, hoping the subtle sting of the alcohol would wake you up, and trigger something to make your night more enjoyable.

You began to walk back to where you had left your friend, deciding to scoop her drunk ass up and take her back with you to your place to call it a night at... you checked your phone, a pathetic ten-thirty. But you stopped in your tracks when something caught your eye, or rather someone.

Turning your head toward the seated area, which basically served as the VIP section without actually having the name, because there was nothing special about it. Old red velvet couches that had seen better days and probably had every fluid known to man seeped into the cushions, and wobbly tables that were smattered with decade-old stains.

You squinted your eyes, the stage lights blinding you as you put a hand up, shielding your eyes as you attempted to make out a vaguely familiar shape that was sitting in said area. You took a tentative step forward, thinking that your eyes were deceiving you, the wild lights making you see things. Because there was no fucking way that you were actually seeing what you were seeing, no fucking way.

Your eyes bulged out of your head at the sight. Your dad’s neighbour, Joel Miller, was sitting on one of the couches, a beer in one hand, his other hand disappearing below the cut of the table. Your eyes followed his hand, trailing down the length of him until they snagged on the back of someone's legs, kneeling below the table.

Your lips parted slightly, completely caught off guard by what you were seeing. You were watching your dad’s neighbour— or better yet, his best friend, get sucked off at a club. Feeling your face heat, you looked away, embarrassment coating your skin.

Your stomach lurched, turning with nausea and something else, your skin pricking with sweat as you glanced back up at Joel, meeting his already waiting eyes. Those chocolate brown orbs were blown, wide, and ghosting with surprise as he raked them over the expanse of you.

His face glowed in the low light of the club, the flashing lights dancing and snagging your gaze to his lustful expression. The way that his eyes were heavy-lidded, the slight sheen that coated his brow, and the way that his chest rose and fell excessively.

It was a scene that you couldn’t look away from, even though you wanted to. You wanted to get out of there and go... well, you didn’t exactly know. The longer that Joel’s eyes held yours, the more you felt yourself being drawn into his orbit, his world. Your chest began rising and falling in time with his own, and a dull throbbing began in your cunt, surprising you completely.

You didn’t think that you’d be this kind of person, someone who was turned on by watching other people having sex. But you also couldn’t deny or explain the influx of wetness that saturated your panties.

You awkwardly clenched your thighs, rubbing them together to ease some of the pressure you felt. Joel’s stare burned into you, causing your heartbeat to thrum erratically in your throat.

You felt sick and depraved and like you should be anywhere else in the world, but another part of yourself couldn’t look away, because you didn’t want to.

You wanted to see Joel fall apart right in front of you, to see him burst at the seams and devolve into a fit of pleasure right before your eyes. And like you had wished it into existence, you watched as he tipped his head back, snapping his eyes closed, his whole body convulsing as he came. You’d be lying if you said that it wasn’t a beautiful sight to behold.

Another gush of your own arousal leaked out of you, sticking the thin material of your panties flush against your cunt, rubbing against your already swollen clit. Fuck, you felt too hot and you needed to cool down, maybe splash some water on your face.

Ducking out of Joel’s line of sight, you headed past the winding staircase, down a rather dark hallway, and toward a couple of heavy-set doors that housed the bathrooms. There weren’t many people around, only a few bodies scattered throughout the hall.

Couples made out in the dark and you may or may not have seen a drug deal going down. But none of that mattered now, the only thing you needed to do was close yourself into a stall and try to get your hormones under control.

Even though the thud of the music carried all the way down the hall, you could still hear a rhythmic thump of someone stomping in your direction. You turned on your heels, anxious to see who it was. Before you could even blink, strong arms shoved you past one of the steel doors, locking it behind you, before planting you against it on the other side.

Your eyes trailed their broad and expansive chest, cresting at their salt and pepper beard and mustache, and settling on their sinful eyes. Eyes you had just been staring into moments before. It was Joel. Shock and something lustful coasted through you, sending a shiver of pleasure up your spine.

Joel’s face was inches from yours, his breathing mingling with your own, the heady scent of beer invaded your nostrils. His eyes dipped to your lips and then lazily dragged back to your eyes. His hands were resting on your hips, keeping you between the door and his body, caging you in.

“What’re you doing?”, you asked, swallowing thickly, trying to avoid his eyes.

“What’s it look like ‘m doing?”, he replied, his Southern drawl coming out as thick as honey, making your thighs snap together.

You shook your head gingerly, “Dunno...”.

His lips quirked up, a sinister smirk plastered on his face, “Turn around”. His voice was gruff and assertive, making you quiver at the tone.

You were stunned into silence, your mouth opening and closing like you were trying to catch flies, surprised by his forwardness.

“What—”, you started.

You couldn’t even catch your breath before Joel’s rough grip grabbed your arms, turning you around in his hold and pressing your front against the edge of the sink, basically bending you in half so that your ass was facing him, on full display.

“This fuckin’ dress”, he mumbled behind you, fisting the material and tugging it up, bunching it around your waist, leaving your ass bare save for your drenched thong. “Wanted to fucking rip it off of ya”.

You whined, pushing your ass toward him, your body completely under his spell, his raspy voice suddenly fulfilling every dirty fantasy you’d ever had about this man. It wasn’t as if he was unattractive by any stretch of the word, he was ruggedly attractive even.

Your mind couldn’t concentrate on your thoughts of how attractive Joel was before a stinging slap came down on your bare ass cheek. You craned your neck, as best you could, but you felt another quick sting, forcing you to remain in the position you were in.

“Fuck—”, you half-whined, half-mewled, both turned on and pissed off at the same time. “You can’t just—”.

Another slap, harder this time, causing your body to jolt and instinctively wiggle away from the pain.

“I can—”, Joel groaned, another full-palm slap on your ass, probably leaving a large, red imprint there. “And I will”.

Joel’s other hand was pressing down on your back, pushing your face further and further toward the porcelain sink that wasn’t as white as it probably had been once upon a time. It made your stomach revolt against you, the combination of cigarette ash and week-old vomit was not the most pleasant scent.

You felt Joel’s hand slip away from your ass, his fingers trailing over the back of your exposed legs, moving lower and lower. You attempted to look behind you again, his body not crowding you anymore.

When you did manage to sneak a peek, he was lowering himself onto his knees, spreading your legs farther apart by the back of your knees.

Your eyes went wide, “What- what are you doing, Mr. Miller?”.

Joel rolled his eyes, nipping at your sore ass cheek, causing you to jump. “So many goddamn questions”.

You muttered something incoherent, a protest of some sort, but Joel wouldn’t hear it, only ignoring you and continuing on his mission. He pulled your deep red thong to the side, the chilled air in the bathroom hitting your exposed clit deliciously.

“Mm, my favourite colour”, he groaned.

You shook like a leaf as you awaited what came next, feeling Joel’s harsh breath closing in on your pussy, the anticipation actually killing you. It was like a shock to your system, the feel of his warm mouth suctioning to your lips, sucking and licking like he had been deprived all this time.

Your hips pressed back into him, involuntarily chasing the sensation, the friction, the high. The brash feel of Joel’s beard tickled you, circling your entrance like a shark would its dinner. He licked along your folds, fucking his girthy tongue into your hole as he spread your cheeks further apart, stretching you painfully with the size of it.

You were a moaning mess, hands strangling the edge of the sink, as you held on for dear life. Searing pleasure gripped your lower stomach, throttling your insides as Joel picked up his pace, helping you to your orgasm.

It came over you suddenly and violently, making you shake as you clenched your eyes shut, rocking back into him as light burst behind your eyes, making your body sweat and tingle with the aftershocks.

You felt Joel move to stand, palming the flesh of your ass cheeks with both his hands as you took this opportunity to catch your breath. Your chest heaved as you lay virtually flat against the sink, your breasts squishing down painfully.

Lightheaded and completely fucked out, you hadn’t even been aware that Joel’s hands were on you again, manhandling you so that you were turned around, facing him. He roughly gripped the hem of your dress, yanking the material down, your breasts popping out of their constraints.

“D’you like what you saw earlier?”, Joel asked, his voice dropping an octave, causing goosebumps to erupt all over your skin. “Hmm? Was that sweet lil’ pussy weeping for me while I was getting blown?”.

Your mind was clouded, a fog settling over each neuron, slowing down your capacity to think and speak, let alone to respond to him. You nodded your head, moaning in his ear, rubbing your jaw along his own, scraping your skin over his patchy beard.

“Fuck”, he groaned, rutting his hardened bulge into your thigh, creating succulent friction for himself while you leaned back, taking it. “I almost blew my load when I saw that you were watching me, gettin’ off on seeing that”.

You dropped your head to his shoulder, your mind still stuck in that post-orgasm haze.

Joel gripped your chin in his fingers, tipping your head up so that your eyes were locked with his, “Eyes on me, darlin’. I ain’t finished with you yet”.

You nodded again, your breathing coming out rushed as you gulped down heaps of air, filling your lungs, eyes locked on Joel’s. Your lids were heavy, vision clouded as Joel leaned forward, lips grazing yours.

His teeth came down on your bottom lip, suddenly, making you yelp. The pressure was light, not as hard as you were expecting, not as hard as a part of you wanted. Joel groaned, his hands roaming all over you. Your hips, your stomach, your ass.

Your hands raked up and down Joel’s chest, steadying yourself with the feeling of the coarse material underneath your palms. Your gaze flicked down to his buttoned-up shirt, to the three buttons that were undone, the dense hair on his chest, stippled with grey and white.

He hummed, his chest rumbling below your fingers as you dipped them under his shirt, weaving through the loose curls, exploring the feel of him. His chest was solid, firm, strong, dependable. A strange wave of calm washed over you, igniting your confidence.

“No...”, you breathed, your chest heaving, pulling one raspy breath after another from your lungs, “I’m not finished with you yet”.

Joel’s eyes widened, his mouth parted, his tongue peeking out to swipe over his already glistening lips. A smirk tugged at the edge, his index finger slipping past your bottom lip. You opened wider, allowing his digit to slip into your mouth, the heedy taste of sweat and something sweeter settled on your tongue, your taste buds exploding with the tang of him.

“Is that so?”, Joel cooed, his voice dripping, oozing with unbridled desire.

He pushed his digit deeper into your mouth, hitting the back of your throat roughly. The intrusion was sudden, making your eyes snap shut as you tried your best to keep it together, to not give Joel the reaction he was looking for. But you gagged, all the same, drool pooling and dribbling out of the corner of your mouth.

You heard Joel click his teeth, a disappointed tsk coming from deep in his chest as he tried again, this time gripping your chin with his other hand, making sure you opened wide for him.

“Come on, you can do better than that...”, he mused, his middle finger accompanying his index, sliding them deeper and deeper down your throat, until you couldn’t do anything but take it, the will to fight against the shock to your system fading quickly. “Show Daddy how much you want to suck his cock”.

Your pussy began to thrum rapidly, your slick running down your inner thighs, making them sticky, making you even more of a mess than you already felt. You moaned around Joel’s fingers, sucking and bobbing your head along them as best as you could.

His hand dropped from your chin to rub at your peaked and sensitive nipples, playing with them, distracting you from what you were doing. It was maddening, the sensation, the tweaking, the way he chuckled under his breath when you stuttered around him, groaning every time you took him deeper.

He pinched your right nipple harder, twisting it, “Keep going, baby”.

That was all the reminder that you needed. You shifted your focus back, inhaling through your nose deeply, taking his fingers down more, more, more. Tears bubbled along your waterline, making your vision of Joel blurry, and unfocused.

Suddenly, he pulled his fingers out of your mouth, a thin line of your saliva still attaching you to him. Your attention was focused on the strand until it broke, your gaze sliding up Joel’s face, past his greying and patchy beard, his full, plump lips, and settling on his burning eyes.

“Are you ready for Daddy’s cock now? Hm?”, he asked, in an almost mocking tone.

You nodded, still a little dazed, still a little flustered. He grabbed your chin forcefully, his grip tight as he angled your head up, your eyes downcast as you kept them locked with his.

“Tell me you want it, darlin’”, Joel’s face was inches from yours, his lips so close that you could push up on your toes and kiss him, feel them against you, but you didn’t, not yet. “Tell me you need it”.

“I-I need it...”, you said, low. Joel’s brow raised, urging you to continue, “Daddy...”, you whined, your hips grinding into his thigh absentmindedly.

Joel nodded, his pupils blown out, gleaming with lust and dark intent. You watched as his hands dragged across his stomach, sliding down farther and farther, resting above his belt.

“Can I...”, you trailed off, preoccupied by his massive bulge, the way that it twitched in his jeans, practically punching a hole through them.

Joel smirked, “Yeah, go ahead, baby”. His breathing was stunted, coming out in shallow pants as he anticipated you finally touching him.

You reached out, hands dangling loosely on his hips, thumb rubbing along his zipper. You heard Joel’s breathing hitch above you, and you smirked. So, he was just as affected as you were... interesting.

Holding in a breath, you tentatively searched his eyes a last time, he nodded slightly, his eyes never leaving you. You sank to your knees, Joel’s hand darting out to grab your arm, stabilizing you as you lowered yourself fully.

You looked up at him through your full lashes, trapping him with your stare as you undid his jeans, slowly, with purpose. Your heart hammered in your chest, your mouth already filled with saliva as you awaited what you anticipated to be a huge cock.

You couldn’t believe that you were on your knees, wrestling with Joel’s belt as he stood over you, towering over you, when just the other day he was helping your Dad change the oil in your car.

Your Dad hadn’t been any the wiser to the way you had been ogling his neighbour and best friend the entire time. How you traced every bead of sweat that presented on his brow, how you watched intensely as his back muscles contracted under his plain black t-shirt every time he bent over the hood of the car, making you bite your lip as you imagined all the ways he could bend you over that hood and rail you into oblivion.

You had focused on his dirty fingers, how meticulous and deft they were as they tinkled with the fine parts inside of your car, how filthy they were, covered in inky black smears. You felt like you were in heat, completely turned on by normal, everyday things, something as simple as a man— who again, was old enough to be your Dad, helping your actual father tune up your car.

Pulling Joel’s zipper down, his black briefs hugged the shape of his cock, the fleecy material moulding his straining member beautifully. Your mouth watered at the sight, the size of him, the way that he smelled, even before you pulled him out of his underwear.

You couldn’t help yourself, you needed to taste him then, immediately. Your core fluttered as you inched forward, hands wrapping around his thick, sturdy thighs, your nose burying deep into his hardened flesh, inhaling his intoxicating scent. And it was intoxicating.

Your head was already swimming, your lips rubbing up and down his shaft, tongue licking his clothed cock. His musky soap took over your senses, the way his heavy scent settled over you, drawing you in deep, your tongue basically lapping at him now. Greedily, hungrily, shamelessly.

Joel’s hands dropped down to your hair, tangling in it. His hold was painful, bordering on brutal. You couldn’t handle it anymore, being so close and yet not close enough.

Your hands fumbled with the waistband of his underwear, dragging his pulsating cock out of them, feeling the weight of him in your hand. How warm and supple he was, how heavy and manly it was.

Wrapping your hand over him, feeling flesh on flesh, skin on skin, warmth flooded your core, arousal seeping from you again. Joel sharply inhaled a breath through his teeth, wincing when you took hold of him.

You looked up at him through lashed eyes, “What’s wrong?”.

Joel shook his head, “Cold”.

You snickered, rubbing your thumb over his slit, making his fists in your hair tighten significantly. In the low light, you could see a glob of something shimmering on his shaft, calling out to you. You took a closer look, realizing that it was lip gloss. Her lip gloss.

Your gut simmered and boiled as you inspected it, collecting it on your finger and wiping it off on his jeans, practically snarling as you did.

“She meant nothing, baby”, Joel said, his voice devolving into a groan when you slowly started stroking him.

You hummed, not completely satisfied with his answer but deciding to let it go for now. He wasn’t yours and you had no say over what or who he did. You tugged harder, angrier, even though you knew it was irrational to get upset over this.

“I can do it better”, you said, catching yourself off guard with your own words. Joel angled your head up, making you look at him.

“Show me then”, he mumbled, his eyes glazing over with desire as he watched you intently.

You sank down lower, face now level with his cock, fingers brushing against the wiry, short hair at the base. You inhaled deeply, inhaled the scent of him— sharp, masculine, heedy.

He was all man and he was all yours for the moment; his lips parted slightly, his eyes hooded as he looked down at you, his tongue darting out to run along his parched lips, watching you like a hawk, cementing to memory the image of you on your knees for him, his best friend’s little girl hungry for his cock, ready to gag on it and swallow down every bit of his seed until she was choking on it.

Joel’s cock pulsed under your touch, twitching with anticipation. Your lips quirked up at the edge, satisfied with his reaction to you, even though you hadn’t even started yet.

You leaned in, planting a sweet kiss on his tip, Joel’s hand flying to your hair, steadying himself as your tongue popped out, running along the underside of his shaft, the feeling so fucking delicious that he would have burst if he hadn’t tugged you away from his cock faster than you could suck him into your mouth.

“Stop... fucking teasing me...”, Joel breathed out, through clenched teeth, the pain in his voice making you giggle.

“Okay”, you conceded, rolling your eyes like the fucking brat that you were.

Joel loosed his grip on your hair significantly, and you pushed on, suckling at his tip, your tongue gliding over the head over and over again, effectively driving him insane— if his noises were any indication of that.

You took a deep breath through your nose and took more of him, hallowing out your cheeks, covering your teeth with your lips. Spit painted his cock, the smell mixing with the overwhelming scent that was already present in the bathroom.

You bobbed up and down on Joel’s cock, spurred on by the moans and broken grunts that were coming from him, your name and only your name spilling from his lips.

“God, you love this cock”, Joel mumbled, loud enough for you to hear, your pussy beginning to throb again. “Don’t ya?”.

You attempted to nod, opening your throat more for him to slide his length farther down.

“My little cock slut, huh?”, Joel grunted, his other hand joining the one that was already tangled in your hair, grabbing your head and shoving himself deeper down your throat.

You lost your rhythm, sputtering around him when you felt his tip hit the back of your throat. You closed your eyes, trying to breathe, but Joel wasn’t having any of it. He yanked hard, tipping your head up, your eyes glazed with tears.

“What did I say? Eyes on me”, he growled, taking over— taking charge of the situation. You gripped his thighs, holding on for dear life, as he used your mouth to get off, not caring in the slightest that you were running out of air.

Joel’s hips snapped violently as he pushed himself down your throat, groaning at the feel of it hugging his cock, squeezing it like he was fucking your pussy, fluttering every time you swallowed around him.

He grunted loudly, his tempo becoming stuttered, “What would your Daddy say? Hm? What would he say if saw you right now, your mouth stuffed full of my cock, makeup running down your cheeks?”.

You moaned around him, eliciting a pained groan from Joel, “Fuck, yeah, ‘s it... you’re doing so well for me”.

Tears were streaming down your cheeks, your eyes stinging as you blinked them away, swallowing around Joel’s cock periodically, trying to get him to cum.

He was close, you could feel it in the way that he was tensing up, his pace unsteady and rushed, head thrown back as he let the feeling wash over him. It was a sight to behold, your arousal leaking from you as you watched him.

A loud bang came from the other side of the bathroom door, some muffled shouting. Joel’s head snapped up at the intrusion, his thrusts becoming angrier each time he pulled out of you, only to shove back in harder.

The banging came again but this time Joel didn’t take his eyes off of you, didn’t want to miss how you reacted when he came down your throat.

“Want you to swallow it, darlin’. Don’t want you wasting a single drop”.

You hummed again, a hand reaching for his balls, massaging them in time with his thrusts. A loud grunt was all the warning that you got before Joel spilled his load down your throat, his seed hot as it pooled in your mouth, the taste salty and overwhelming to your senses.

You swallowed as much of him as you could, delighting in how he shuddered above you as he milked himself into your waiting and open mouth. He stepped back from you, tucking himself back into his jeans, running a hand through his sweat-slick curls.

A drop of his cum ran down your chin and you didn’t waste a second before you thumbed it, sticking the finger into your mouth and sucking it clean, a lewd pop emitting in the echoing bathroom when you were finished.

With a hand on the porcelain sink, you got to your feet, adjusting your dress and fixing your hair and makeup in the dirty mirror. You shrugged, not caring how you really looked, the club was dark enough that no one would be the wiser to what had just occurred. You hoped.

You turned to Joel who still had that look in his eye as he stared at you.

“What?”, you asked.

He shook his head, “Nothin’”. Another bang on the door, Joel’s head turned to the noise, his features darkening, “I’m going to knock their fuckin’ head off if they knock one more time”.

You walked to the door, patting Joel’s chest as you passed him, pulling it open. You stopped before you were all the way through, looking back at Joel.

You cleared your throat, your voice coming out raspier than usual, “See you around, Mr. Miller”.

You could have sworn that you saw a touch of a smile ghost his face, but you couldn’t be sure. You left the way you came, traversing the dark hallway and meeting up with your friend who was more than a little drunk.

You joined the group of them, dancing and grinding for hours. Maybe your night out wasn’t as bad as you had originally thought. You unconsciously scanned the dance floor— the club for the brooding neighbour you had a quickie with in the bathroom, but he was nowhere to be found.

You shrugged, only mildly disappointed that you were dancing with horny boys rather than the man who had made you see stars over and over again. But you smiled to yourself because you’d see him again, that was a guarantee, and maybe, just maybe he would need to help your Dad fix your car.

taglist: @morallyinept @reddedmiller @hellishjoel @jenispunk @cavillscurls @kiwisbell @joelslegalwhre

let me know if you would like to be added to my taglist!

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ioniansunsets · 6 months

Note

please just a crumb of heartsteel sett 🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️

✖ Heartsteel!Sett Headcanons ✖

✖ Word Count: 876

✖ Tags: Established R/S

✖ A/N: Just crumbs! I am UNINSPIRED! Aaaa it's just very domestic headcanons. Feel free to ask for more specific things if any of these make you excited!

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- He likes picking you up, he's strong enough to. You cant reach something? No, he's not helping you, he's picking you up so you can do it yourself. Huh, walking is tiring? He's carrying you. Oh damn there's a puddle, alright up we go. Sett makes sure he can lift your weight. There is no instance you would catch him lacking, man will hoist you.

- Sett is always looking for you. Like actually turning around to make sure you're in the room. Waiting and searching to see if you are still following him. Walking around a store to make sure he has his eyes on you. He likes knowing you are there, that you are near so every so often you can see his head rise and turn as he looks for you, making sure you are there. The same for when he performs! Sett is constantly scanning the audience to find your face. Hoping to see you. Smiling widely when he does. He loves you! He WANTS to see you as often as possible.

- His ears get cold! He likes it a lot when you lightly rub them, actually being able to feel the warmth of your hands heat it up. Because he works out so often he is just a natural warm guy, so he feels the cold when the wind blows at his ears. Its why Ma made him the beanie anyway. If you kiss his ears they twitch. When he blushes they get warm. When you scratch them you might hear him purr, its a deep rumbling, a warm tone.

- Sett thinks its adorable if you want to work out with him! He will spot for you, give you advice, help you every way he can. Meal plans, tips and tricks, your personal trainer and motivator. Soft kisses when you hit a goal. Big hugs when you survive a gruesome set. He loves spending time with you and if you follow him to the gym he can do just that. Tired after? He's carrying you out.

- He likes body contact. He likes when you sit by him, lying on his lap as he practices singing or rapping. He likes you holding his hand as you walk around on dates. He likes to hug you from behind as you do things. He likes the physical reassurance that you are by his side. A hand around your shoulder as you two sit and chat. The gentle touch of his hand on your thigh when you talk to him. His arms wrapping around you when he falls asleep by your side. All the small things. He loves feeling You.

- When he gets the chance he always tries to buy you thoughtful gifts. He remembers! Ma taught him well. When you talk about needing a new bag because your old one is breaking? He find the best one and buys it for you. You talk about your favorite colors and animals? He remembers! He buys you cute little gifts that remind him of that. Damn, winter is cold, you forgot you lost your old gloves? He already bought you a new pair in fall. There are cuter moments too. You bringing up snacks you miss from childhood? He learns, he bakes them for you, buys them for you, finds Someone who sells them to get them for you. He is attentive. He is an idol with money, he will do what he can for you how he can.

- If you can and show up for his shoots or practices he gets excited. Doing his best, making sure to get things done as soon as possible so he find you during a break. Happily chatting with you while he hydrates. Laughing and joking at his mistakes with you when he fumbles. You warm his heart. If you get along well with everyone else in Heartsteel he gets happier. They are like family to him afterall.

- He refuses to have you spend money on him when its band related, he gives you all his merch. He gets a copy anyway and they are YOURS. Sett is happy to see you wearing a tee with his face! Have posters of him (signed) in your room. He likes if you show him off as much as he shows you off. He loves loving you and loves being loved.

- If you get hurt or get sick he's is nervous and frantic. He wants to be there for you at all times, making sure you are ok. He frets over you, genuinely worried that a little cold will be life or death. He doesn't know how to actually help you thought, it takes help from messaging his mother and Yone to realize he needs to keep you cool, get you food and just let you rest. Which he hasn't been doing cos he's been in and out of your room non-stop. But he's learning.

- He hums a lot! You can catch him singing or humming songs while working out, showering, doing chores. He is a rockstar and music is important to him, it shows. He doesn't get embarrassed if you point it out, its more like a " Eh? I didn't realize it was even doing it. Must be a good tune." Moment.

#Heartsteel!Sett #Settrigh #Sett x Reader #HEADCANONS #League of Legends Headcanons #Sett LoL #Sett League #SettLeague #League of Legends

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treasureofmammon · 2 months

Note

How about writing demon brothers as dads headcanon?

✨️Him as a dad✨️

I was feeling uninspired, but many of you gave me great ideas when I asked. Here is Anon's adorable idea: the 7 brothers as dads!

👥️Characters: Lucifer, Mammon, Leviathan, Satan, Asmodeus, Beelzebub, Belphegor + MC (gn!reader) + Second generation (gender neutral as well)

⚠️Warnings: Fluff. "Conceiving" mentioned, so there's obvious hints to s3x. Obviously, the theme is Fatherhood.

🔎These are some headcannons that I have about the 7 brothers as dads, mostly based on my own interpretation of how they act.

📝 Note: I wrote one for Mammon alone some months ago, which you can read here

✨️💖💛✨️💖💛✨️💖💛✨️💖💛✨️💖💛✨️💖💛✨️

✨️ Intro ✨️

You and him have been trying to have a baby for some time now, either that you have been trying to conceive or that you have been waiting for a positive answer from an adoption agency.

Now, the good news come: you are having a baby! What would you and this child/children might expect of him as a father?

💙 Lucifer 💙

• He's already a dad! In fact, he's a dad at heart. Actually, taking care of anyone is something that comes naturally to him; although it's usually quite a displeasure to babysit who he has to babysit (yes, his brothers). So when you let him know that he's gonna be a father, the man is so excited! This is something that he really looks forward to.

• His first reaction is shock. But after a few seconds of letting it sink in, he's so happy! He hugs you tight! And he might cry a little but won't let you know. —Lu-Luci, are you crying?—, he looks away and sniffs, —N-No...—.

• As a provider, Lucifer is excellent. This child has it all from birth to adulthood and even beyond!

• At first, he makes sure that the kid's room is ready to receive them and is constantly changing it as they grow up to suit their needs.

• He tries his best to enroll the child in the best kindergarten, the best elementary school, the best high school, the best college, etc. In fact, in their first years, Luci is making sure that his baby is receiving all the positive stimulation you two can provide.

• Lucifer is an avid reader as well, so he's definitely reading to the child and encouraging them to read once the child knows how.

• He has a busy schedule, but he tries his best to assist to all of the events and activities that the kid has. A school play? Man is there with a camera on! A concert? Man is there with a camera on! A dance performance? Man is there with a camera on!

• Also, at those moments, he's feeling especially proud. With a huge grin in his face and his puffed chest filled with pride, he stands up at the end of the activity and applauds enthusiastically.

• Lucifer might not initiate affectionate contact, meaning he's not going to hug anyone unless asked. Nonetheless, if the kid extends his arms to his father, he for sure is hugging the kid, picking them up, and kissing them if asked.

• The child is probably very loving, though. You have thought them to be like that because you know Luci has some small issues with showing it himself, sometimes. But he's usually happy to receive the love. For instance, Lucifer might not always say "I love you", but if the kid says so, Luci will, of course, answer "me too". Or he might not kiss this kid out of the blue, but if the kid asks or surprises Lucifer with a kiss, Luci is happy to bent down and put his cheek in front of the kid for a little goodbye, goodnight or hello kissy.

• Although he might not be very expressive with his words, he expresses his love with his actions and acts of service. Lucifer is as present as he can. Always delivering to whatever this child needs.

• He's also a jealous father. So, the teenage child or young adult will have a hard time introducing you two to their romantic partner.

💛 Mammon 💛

• Mammon will cry! —Mammon, we will be parents!—, Mammon will be shocked, but then, he'll burst in tears, especially if this is something he's been looking forward to. —Honey, are you crying?— you ask, and answering between sniffs, he will say something tsundere-like: —N-No! I just got somethin' in my eyes! Like happiness or whatever...—. You must hug him very tight!

• Mammon is definitely buying everything in the Devildom to make this kid happy, from clothes, to decor, to toys (some not even appropriate for their age, say a figurine or a remote control car that the baby won't be able to play with until years later).

• He's preparing the kid's room almost on his own (especially if you're pregnant), doing all sorts of DIY projects until he's happy with the results.

• If you're pregnant, Mammon won't leave your side. He's there all the time!, either holding your hand, helping you get up, holding your hair if you are nauseous, etc. He's a supportive partner!

• Although he's messy. Once told he'll be a father, my baby boo is buckling up for real now. He might not stop gambling or his entrepreneur mistakes, but he'll slow down and always have enough money to give to his household.

• Mammon will take every bit of model gigs that he can to provide to this child and you. Although, you're probably the main provider of the household (let's be honest).

• He will play with this kid constantly, making pillow forts, hide and seek, etc.

• Mammon is happy to cook for this kid and then feed them until they have the age to properly feed themselves. For him, doing these domestic tasks is something he truly enjoys but will never let anyone know.

• He definitely cries with every achievement this kid has, even if it's just a symbolic graduation from kindergarten, Mammon is crying. You have to constantly reassure and console him, but it's no issue, right? After all, that just shows how much he loves this kid. Mammon is too cute!

• Mammon is also as present as he can. He records or takes pictures of everything: his baby's firsts steps, his baby's birthdays, his kid's graduations, his child's performances. Everything! And he knows how to do it in a way that looks good and even artistic.

• Mammon will not always help the kid with his homework, as some things might be difficult for him, either because he has a hard time explaining himself or because at some point, the topics will get too complicated for him. But Mammon will do what he can; for example, he'll definitely help if it's something like a solar system model.

• I'm sorry, but Mammon is incapable of punishing this child. That's a you task. Nonetheless, he's always there to nod at your side. He knows you're right.

• He will make original songs for your kid.

• On that note, he'll sing lullabies at night while tucking them up in bed. He won't read them though, because he usually falls asleep before them. It's quite funny actually.

• Though he acts like a tough guy, he has a soft spot for this kid for sure. It's a side that you always knew he had, but his family and friends didn't, so it's a pleasant surprise for everyone. Lucifer is super proud of Dad Mammon but won't tell him.

• Mammon is ready to drive the child to wherever they need to go. He might find it like a drag, but he'll do it for their own safety.

• He always prepares family movie nights, cheap family outings, special dinners and more. He's very creative on this one.

• Mammon will encourage and accept his kid's desires, opinions and decisions. He's a supportive dad all the way!

• He's also a protective and jealous dad! Your teenager kid / young adult child is having a hard time introducing him to their significant other.

🧡 Leviathan 🧡

• The news take him by surprise. He knew this is something that you wanted and he, as usual, is willing to give you whatever you want, but now that it's a reality, he is a mix of nervousness and happiness.

• He has a lot of self doubts of him as a dad the first few months (even years), so you constantly have to reassure him that everything will be okay and that he will/is doing great.

• With time, he's nervousness transforms into excitement! Especially when you brought up the topic of the kid becoming a new player.

• He'll design and sew family t-shirts with "Player N.1", "Player N.2" and "Player N.3" phrases.

• If a newborn baby, the first time he sees them, he's very scared to hold them, but once you teach him how and he calms down, he looks at his child's little face and cries. You stay in silence by his side, and say nothing, letting him have his father-child moment in peace.

• Levi is a very supportive father, constantly backing up his child's decisions and actions.

• His kid is definitely very aware that bullying is wrong, except if directed to uncle Mammon. So Levi is a very proud dad when he realizes that his kid is stepping up to defend someone.

• Leviathan is definitely helping with homework, especially if artistic or crafty. He's also designing all the costumes for the school plays and dance performances.

• He has a hard time coming to parent meetings, so that's a task that you'll have to assume. Sorry. But that doesn't mean he isn't interested in what they had to say; in fact, as soon as you walk in home, he's asking about everything the teacher said.

• Levi will go to school events and activities, but it takes a lot of effort for him to do so. You have convinced him to use his Navy uniform and act as an extroverted anime Admiral. That façade actually helped him in Parents' day, when each kid had to introduce one of his parents and then the parent had to explain their job: —I- I...— *ahem* —I am the Devildom's Grand Admiral, Leviathan, Avatar of Envy...—, suddenly, a very deep and masculine voice that you and your kid have never heard comes out of Levi, explaining his job as an Admiral, part of his act as his alterego character.

• Levi does slow down with his gaming addiction. He has to, because you two need to work as a team to raise this kid well.

• Talking about gaming, Levi is pushing this hobby to his child too. He also watches anime and reads manga to/with his child since a little baby. Either they'll grow up to love it or hate it.

• Once you're able to go back to work, he stays home and takes care of everything on that side. Although he might have escaped from a task once or twice during the day to play videogames, watch anime or read manga. Once an otaku, always an otaku.

• Nonetheless, Leviathan will take decisions and act in ways that not you nor his family and friends expected. As a father, Levi will grow up in a heartbeat, without stop being himself. It's something extraordinary and wonderful to see. This actually happened to my uncle, it was so interesting.

• Finally, Levi is not a jealous father. On the contrary, he will respect his child's decision and encourage them unconditionally always. Always.

💚 Satan 💚

• —Satan, we are having a child!—. Very much like some of his brothers, he's shocked to know; but slowly, as the news sink in, he goes from shocked to complete happiness. To said the least, he's thrilled, hugging you tight and kissing you all-over your pretty face, —I love you so much, thank you kitten!—. He might tear a little, but won't even hide it. —Oh! Darling, are you crying?—, —Why, of course! I'm going to be a dad! I'm happy!—.

• Satan is definitely getting serious as soon as the news arrive. He'll get a job, probably as an scholar. And if you're not married yet, he'll marry you for sure: —I read that it's a big deal in the human realm if people have kids without getting married, so I'll propose to you anytime soon! Prepare kitten—, you sigh and answer —Honey, have you been reading human books from the XIX century again?—, —... ... ... That doesn't matter, ok? Let's get married!—. Don't worry, he'll propose to you again and in a very romantic way.

• He's also reading a lot of parenting books, like..., a lot.

• If the child is a baby (biological or not), Satan will go shopping with you to get the nursery room ready. And yes, everything is cat themed; I promise it looks adorable anyway.

• When Satan sees this child for the first time, he feels an instant connection. He'll carefully hold his baby/kid, look at their small face, and cry of happiness, completely full of love for them.

• Once the child is home (if adopted) or big enough (if biological), he's a super dad! He prepares nutritional meals, he plays stimulating games with them, he reads them all the time, and teach them all the important things. It's actually a beautiful sight to witness.

• He'll waste no opportunity to dress his adorable kid in cat themed clothes.

• Satan, as the book lover that he is, will definitely encourage reading. In fact, reading is a must in this household!

• Similar to Lucifer, Satan wants the best education for his child from start to finish. He might be a little pushy with the fact that academical success is important, which might cause tension between him and his child if the latter doesn't enjoy it or has a hard time.

• Nonetheless, Satan is always there to help with homework. He also gives great advice.

• Since Satan has some paternal figure issues, he might doubt himself from time to time, reconsidering his methods as a dad. Even if he read all the parenting books there is, like the rest of his brothers (and the entirety of parents in the world), nothing actually prepared him for parenthood. However, he has you by his side to help, talk, and give him encouragement if needed. And so, likewise, if you feel doubtful, he's there for you too.

• He's 100% in all his kid's events. He won't miss one. He doesn't like to be the one filming or taking pictures. That'd be you. Because he actually prefers to enjoy his kid's performances to the fullest without any interruptions. He feels extremely proud once the event is over.

• He's a very active dad in matters like school meetings, parents' day, festivals, sports, poetry recitals, etc.

• Like Mammon and Lucifer, he's a jealous dad. Yes, this poor child will also have a hard time introducing their partner to Satan.

• Satan would actually be an amazing dad. He will do his best to succeed in this too, trying to find the balance between a loving and a serious dad.

• Now, do you realize that this kid will be the child of Satan? You better raise him in the Devildom to avoid any unnecessary problems in the Human realm.

🩷 Asmodeus 🩷

• Asmo was not into being a dad at first. After all, that'd mean that he can't party as much as he wants. But you managed to convince him. He can't win against you. Besides, he'll give you whatever you want, whenever you want it.

• Although at first he was unsure, after realizing that he'd create something beautiful with you (a family), he was in! Especially if that means conceiving, because... well, he's the Avatar of Lust, after all.

• When you tell him the good news, Asmo is extremely excited! He hugs you and swings you around. —Oh hon! That's fantastic!—. That day turned into one of the best days of his life.

• If you're pregnant, expect Asmo to be around you all the time, making sure that you're alright. He has your back. You can count on him.

• Also, he's definitely designing the most flamboyant kid's room ever! And definitely makes his brothers arrange it for him. It's not that he can't do it himself. It's just that why would he risk damaging his beautiful hands if his brothers are all there?!

• When the kid is finally here, Asmo is excited and happy. He'll definitely cry openly and dramatically because he sincerely feels so. He has been waiting for so long!, and now his child is here, with you two. Immense love fills his chest, and tears can't stop escaping his gorgeous eyes.

• Asmo bought a huge wardrobe with the cutest and most fashionable pieces of clothes for kids!

• You thought that Asmo was not going to change diapers or clean other fluids; but, boy, were you wrong! He does! And he takes the opportunity to dress the baby up every single time, making them look more adorable than they already are. Yes, this kid has around 5 daily outfit changings.

• Obviously, Asmo is in charge of the kid's clothing.

• He's taking pictures and videos of his child ALL THE TIME!! Including selfies. He won't post them on social media, though, because you explained to him how harming that can be. Instead, he is creating an artsy digital album for the family with all these.

• Asmo is not in the school events as a simple viewer, Asmo is the school director of the plays, the choreographer, the music compositor, and/or the costumes' designer. You can bet he's there to make sure his little baby shines!

• As a father, Asmo is very open-minded, loving, and caring. And his child is definitely enjoying all of his attention.

• In fact, Asmo is always hugging your kid tight! This might become a nuisance when they grow older.

• He's also extremely supportive and maybe even a little too laid-back in certain areas. As Mammon, he won't punish this child, and being the "bad guy" will fall on you.

• Asmo is not an overprotective dad. In fact, he encourages his child to live freely, trusting that you and him have made a good job raising them.

❤️ Beelzebub ❤️

• —Beel, I want a baby!—, —Okay—. He won't even dissuade you. He'll give you whatever you want. You want a hamburger?, he'll bring hamburgers to home for you (half eaten by him, sorry). You want a fancy date?, he's taking you on a fancy date. You want a house?, he'll give you a house. You want to murder someone?, he'll do it for you! You want a baby?, he's giving you one in whatever way you want: conceiving, adopting, heck!, even stealing it from their birth parents. Of course, you won't ask him to do something that is clearly wrong. If anything, you're a positive person in his life. That's why he loves you so much.

• For Beel, family is everything, and so is this child. Although he didn't quite realize that he'd be a father until the child arrives. Of course, he's happy when you tell him the good news, but it's until he's holding the baby that it actually sinks.

• Just one look into that kid's face, and he swears that he will protect this child no matter what. Yes, he prepared the kid's room the way you wanted; yes, he saw your belly grow, took care of you and held your hand during childbirth (if you got pregnant); yes, he saw you prepare for everything, but it's until he holds his child that he realizes the precious weight that he has now. —Y/N, I'll protect you and this child with my life—, none a single second to look at another thing or person other than his kid.

• As expected, this kid is very loving with their father because Beel is a gentle giant, a huge teddy bear! They are always hugging him and playing with him.

• And Beel is definitely the type of father to give his child whatever they want.

• Beel is very expressive with his actions. He always does all sorts of things for his kid, from cooking their favorite meal to building them a tree house, from playing with them to helping them do their homework..., everything!

• One of Beel's love languages is quality time, so he'll definitely spend time with his child. Since he's a sports lover, he'll teach the kid some sports (most likely, fangoal).

• Beel is not very expressive with his words, but when needed, Beel will give his kid precious advice. Those are the very few times that your kid will remember his father's wisdom and carry his teachings into adulthood.

• Beel is very open-minded. He will trust his kid's decisions and respect their opinions, hoping you and him have done a good job raising this child.

• Beel is not a jealous father, but if necessary, he'll look into someone if he has a hunch and then talk to you if necessary.

💜 Belphegor 💜

• —Belphie, I want a child!—, an awkward silence fills the attic, a long pause while Belphie looks at you straight in the eyes —... and you chose me to be their dad?!, Nah-ah—. He definitely didn't want to be a dad, that actually didn't even cross his mind. Marry you? Without hesitation. Living together? Obviously, yes! Have pets together? Sure! But him being a dad? Don't you remember the example his dad set?

• But you'll definitely insist on this one (or maybe you'll get pregnant without planning it). Anyway, he will eventually say yes, but only if you let him be (sleep), —... then I guess it's fine. Although it seems like a lot of work but I can't really say no to you if this is something you really want, can I?—, he sighs and lays down in bed, ready to nap for the nth time.

• When the news arrives, Belphie is quite surprised. But he's happy nonetheless. He has never experienced or witnessed firsthand what raising a kid it's like, so he can't help but remember what it was like when Lilith came to life. She was such a refreshing gust of air, wonderfully candid and kind. So suddenly, Belphie is eager to take this step with you.

• If this kid is being born, Belphie suggests naming them Lilith, and you agree.

• Although he doesn't like to do physical efforts, he will prepare the kid's room with a little a lot of help from his twin brother, of course.

• Belphie is a loving father, but since he's lazy, don't expect him to do much around the house. He tries, though. It's just that his sin consumes him most of the time.

• He enjoys peaceful activities, though, like cooking and/or feeding the child, reading them books, playing some games, watching movies, and obviously, sleeping while cuddling.

• Belphie is a stay-at-home dad, so he's quite present in his child's life. But like his brother Leviathan, he'll escape his tasks once or twice a day, although to sleep.

• He might not like going outside to school events, but he always makes a huge effort to go. He watches the whole thing, proud of his kid.

• He cuddles and hugs his kid a lot. He has no reservations in that regard.

• Belphie enjoys family time a lot, especially if you invite Beel to join.

• Belphie doesn't care about anything, as long as his kid is happy, he's fine. So he isn't a jealous dad either.

✨️💖💛✨️💖💛✨️💖💛✨️💖💛✨️💖💛✨️💖💛✨️

[Notes: The character(s) depicted here belong to the mobile game "Obey me: shall we date" and are owned by Solmare Corporation. The text here was made by me: Treasure of Mammon, meaning this is fan-made. | GN!Reader | English is not my first language, so there might be orthographic and syntax errors. I urge you all to interact kindly with this post].

📌 Masterlist

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salty-croissants · 4 months

Note

if your still taking requests, can you do a Bullfrog and Rayman/ramon of their S/O is Pregnant? if you can't that's okay

Thank you for the request !

I apologize for taking longer than usual , I found myself in need of a break since I was feeling a bit too uninspired to write :,T

Anyway I’ve never really written anything for a pregnant reader before , so this was a pretty fun challenge :,)

Hope it turned out okay !

Details : use of female reader ( thought I’d go for that given the prompt , hopefully that’s alright ! ) ;

established relationships ;

no warnings needed

Bullfrog 💚

Deep down , Bullfrog still can’t believe he is actually going to become a dad …

While he is definitely worried about how he is going to keep you and your future child ( or children :> ) safe , this frog is still really looking forward to start a family with you , and he will remind you of this a lot .

< y/n , my dear , I’m just so grateful to have you by my side , you know ?

I’m so happy about our child , je ne peux pas attendre … >

He is the absolute best at taking care of you , using all the spare time he gets when he isn’t out for missions to be there anytime you need something , no matter how small .

< I’m back mon amour !

Here , I brought you some more food in case you get hungry , and I also made some tea while I was at it . >

< Thank you honey ! This is exactly what I needed , you’re amazing ~ >

When you’re feeling a bit fatigued , Bullfrog loves to just rest by your side , with the two of you often falling asleep into each other’s arms .

And if you ever try to stay up anyway , well … your partner is very good at persuading you to do otherwise .

< Hmm … I’m not that tired , sweetie … we can still … talk , or maybe do … something else … >

< Non y/n , you need to get some sleep … you had a long day today , and I don’t want you to stress yourself too much .

I’m going to be right here with you mon cher , so don’t worry , alright ? >

< Heh , alright , thanks Bullfrog …

Oof , give me a second , the little one is starting to feel heavy … >

Your beloved assassin adores those simple moments of intimate bliss he gets with you , and whenever he occasionally opens his eyes to check on you he can’t help but feel an overwhelming happiness , knowing that you’re the person that he’s going to share a family with …

Despite the uncertainty of your futures , Bullfrog knows that as long as you’re with him , there will always be hope for him somehow .

Rayman 🧡

Oh boy is he excited !

Rayman loves children , so the mere thought that he’s going to have a kid with you fills him with joy …

He never thought that he’d be able to have something like this in his life , given the way people see him despite his popularity , so you better believe that he will be showering you with affection … even more than usual .

< Oh y/n , sometimes I still can’t believe this is happening , y’know ?

I just … god , I love you so much ~ >

Unfortunately , I honestly doubt the Directors would show much care about the fact that their star’s partner is going through a pregnancy …

They need Rayman to be on the show , that’s what matters most to them , so as much as he hates the idea of leaving you alone he doesn’t have much of a choice …

< Damn it …

I’m so sorry … if I could stay with you I would , but the Directors … >

< Hey it’s alright hun , I’m just gonna lay here and rest until you come back , I should be just fine . >

< Mm … well , maybe I can convince them to let me go home earlier than usual : I don’t want anything to happen to you because I couldn’t be here , y/n … I … I would never forgive myself … >

< Ray , love … you worry too much .

Now come here , I didn’t forget about your goodbye kiss ~ >

< Heh , thank you y/n … mm … ~

I’ll be here as soon as I can , I promise . >

During the immensely frustrating hours where he can’t be with you , Rayman is still going to remain in contact with you by calling you and sending you texts … a lot .

“Hey sweetie !

This should be the last interview for today , I can’t wait to see you ! ❤️

How do you feel ? I remember yesterday night you couldn’t sleep much , did you manage to get some rest ? Oh , you should also remember to drink some water if you haven’t already , it really is important , especially now !”

“Hi Ray ! ❤️

I’m okay , don’t worry , I got some sleep and that really helped a lot !

I think our child is happy you’re coming home … I can feel it kicking since I begun writing you this message !

We’ll both be waiting for you ❤️❤️”

After Rayman gets home , I hope you’re prepared to be showered with love and affection for the rest of the day :

he just can’t express how much he missed you , from your voice to your beautiful face … you just make him so happy , and knowing that you’re about to start a family together is just everything he could possibly need .

Ramon 🖤

1 Now that he doesn’t have to care about his job or the orders of the Directors , you better believe that Ramon is never , ever going to leave your side , especially now that you’re pregnant .

He is terrified at the idea of losing his one chance of finding happiness in his otherwise bleak existence … he won’t allow that to happen .

< y/n , where are you going ? >

< Ah , I’ll be right back Ram , I just wanted to go for a quick walk just outside , my legs are a bit sore and - >

< I’m coming with you . >

< You don’t have to do that , love … I know the wounds you got yesterday while fighting those Eden guys still hurt , you should rest . >

< I don’t … care about that . I need to be there for you . I need to keep you and our child safe .

Please y/n … you’re all I have . >

< Okay , okay … we’ll go together , hun . I won’t leave you . >

< Thank you … >

He finds it especially comforting to gently rest his head on your stomach , listening to the baby’s occasional small movements beneath …

It’s in little tender moments like these that Ramon can finally put his mind at ease , momentarily forgetting about Eden and the mess you’re in .

< Does this hurt , darling ? >

< Hmm ?

Oh no , it doesn’t ! Don’t worry about it …

It actually feels very nice ~

Ramon’s mind often gets crowded with unwelcome thoughts about what kind of life will he be able to provide to your kid , given the critical situation you’re currently both in , and as much as he tries to keep those feelings to himself you’re able to understand what’s on his mind .

< I know you’re worried about our future , I am too … but I just know things will be alright for all three of us . >

< How do you know that … ? >

< Oh , that’s easy Ram :

I have you here with me , and that’s all I need to keep on going !

It’s not going to be easy , but I know we can face what comes next if we stick together , and we’ll be able to make our child grow happily in a good place . >

< Heh … you always know how to make me feel better , y/n .

I love you so much , you know that … ? >

< I love you too Ramon … trust me , we are going to be okay . >

#captain laserhawk #x reader #bullfrog x reader #rayman x reader #bullfrog captain laserhawk #captain lazerhawk rayman #captain laserhawk bullfrog #rayman #captain lazerhawk bullfrog #female reader

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charmedreincarnation · 11 months

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Imagination is the ultimate freedom

I owe my love for imagination to my childhood. When I was young, I'd find myself looking out my window into the endless sky and the vast landscape, daydreaming about what I could be. As I grew older, my imagination took new forms. I used it to explore new activities and to think outside the box.

My imagination has been a valuable asset in my life and it's comforting to know that I have it always there for me as a safe space. The beauty of imagination is that it can help us to solve even the most difficult problems. It encourages us to look at things from different angles, to think through ideas more deeply and to be more creative in our approaches.

That's why I'm so passionate about my imagination; I know that I'm able to come up with solutions to difficult problems that come up while still staying inside my comfort zone. It is my go-to place when I'm looking for inspiration. Whether it's for a project idea or or a new manifestation desire, I find myself turning to my imagination for help.

The biggest benefit of having an imagination is that you are the only one who has access to your own little world. No one else can access it but you so it's a safe place, a place where you can keep your fears, doubts, and worries at bay. The boundaries of an imagination are determined by only you so the possibilities are endless.

Imagination is why I'm able to keep that child-like motivation all throughout my life. Whenever I'm feeling stuck or uninspired, all I need to do is look inside myself and explore the world of my imagination. It's like taking a step into a totally different world where Imagination is why I'm able to keep that child-like motivation all throughout my life. Whenever I'm feeling stuck or uninspired, all I need to do is look inside myself and explore the world of my imagination. It's like taking a step into a totally different world where anything is possible. All of my dreams and ideas come to life and all I have to do is dream them into existence. Everything is possible. All of my dreams and ideas come to life and all I have to do is dream them into existence.

It’s is a wonderful gift that we have to explore different possibilities, and see potentials in ourselves and our world that we otherwise wouldn't be able to access. We can use our imaginations to create dreams, and those dreams can become our reality if we take the steps necessary to bring them to fruition. Although it may often be seen as a sign of childishness, or foolishness, that couldn't be further from the truth. In fact, it is the ability to imagine that can give us the courage to take action and make our dreams a reality. It is the creativity we have that gives us an edge in life, and the ability to see things in a different perspective.

This is why Goddard preaches that imagination is the key to our inner freedom. He argued that it is through imagination that we can gain control over our experiences and create our own reality. He knew that imagination is the ultimate freedom, the ability to dream up what we want and take action towards it. He said that “nothing is more liberating than to consciously use your imagination to create the life of your dreams”. And that could not be any nearer to the truth.

Don't be afraid to utilize your imagination. The potential of your imagination is immense and it can be the difference between living a life of mediocrity and achieving true greatness. Rather than focusing on what you don’t have, use your imagination to create the life you desire. Visualize yourself living the life you want to live. Put yourself in that position and think about how it would feel. Develop an internal image that you can associate with success and happiness. When you focus on this image, it will give you the confidence and motivation to take action and move forward.

It truly is your greatest asset when it comes to manifesting anything and everything into your dream life. The possibilities are limitless, so use your imagination for good and manifest anything and everything into your dream life.

#law of assumption #neville goddard #manifesation #manifesting #imagination #daydreaming

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whiskersz · 2 months

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I absolutely love your stuff (sent in a matchup and request already) and was wondering if you could do a Husk x reader who almost immediately after seeing him decides that he's their father now (he isn't) the reader is either in their late teens to early 20's and is pretty chaotic and clingy at the same time with them constantly wanting to be around their "father". Have a wonderful day/night!

Hello and thank you so much for appreciating my works! This request was adorable, I went with HCs because I’m a bit uninspired lately? But maybe I’ll add to it in the future :3

Father Figure! Husk x Reader - Platonic

♠ Husk never really thought of being a father, much less in literal Hell. During his life on earth he has always been a bit of a free-spirited individual, travelling from left to right, spending his days in bars and his youth performing magic for others. In Hell, his ‘life’ became a bit more stable, spent inside the Hazbin Hotel serving the residents at the bar, but he still didn’t consider himself a good example or somebody in the condition to care for another soul. So, when you came along and decided to see him out of all demons as a father figure, he was pretty surprised.

♠ Especially considering how different your two personalities are, with him being a grumpy and lazy old man and you being a pretty young and clingy individual, he thought that you two would never get along.

♠ On your first day at the Hotel though, you felt pretty out of place, and the moment he saw you struggling he felt pretty bad for you, so he decided to give you some advice to get along with the others out of the goodness of his heart.

♠ From that moment on, you two became inseparable. Now, you always want to be around your ‘father’, and find excuses to hang out with him at the bar even though he doesn’t allow you to drink alcoholic beverages. He found this a little annoying at first, but with time you and your behaviours grew on him, and he’s always got something non-alcoholic prepared for you on the side!

♠ He also got pretty used to your turbulent personality; if someone questions your behaviour, he'll reply with something along the lines of; "Heh, no need to worry. They're just being themselves."

♠ If you accidentally call him ‘dad’ in front of the others, they will poke fun at you a bit but ultimately think it would be adorable if he was actually your father. Meanwhile he’ll be too stunned to speak; he’ll probably give you a pat on the back and send you on your way, trying not to seem too happy about it, but he’ll be thinking about it all day.

♠ When he went after Angel Dust and came back at the Hotel all beat up, you were very worried for him, and refused to leave his side until all his wounds were completely healed; fortunately the healing process only took a couple hours as they weren’t serious wounds, but you still made him promise to take care of himself and to get into as little fights as possible. He begrudgingly did, giving you a pat on the head.

♠ You also looked out for each other a lot during the Extermination, with him trying to shield you from attacks with his wings and you watching his back while he was occupied fighting against a group of Angels.

♠ He really made sure to let you know how much he appreciates you before the fight, even though he’s not really the type to talk about his feelings. The affection you feel towards him moved him though, so he decided to let his pride aside for once.

#hazbin hotel x reader #hazbin x reader #x reader #husk x reader #husk hazbin hotel #husk x reader platonic #platonic #hazbin hotel husk #husk hazbin #hazbin hotel

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greenerteacups · 3 months

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Hi! I am an ardent fan of your writing, and I hope to be as sorted and planned as you some day in my own writing journey.

My question is: you have a keen eye when it comes to planning character personality, dynamics, and such. I've also been wading through your ask replies, and your insights into how you write people and how you make them play off of each other is so wonderful to read. If it's not too personal a q, how did you learn how to write like this? Did you go to school for writing, does it come from years of observing people, do you have reading list recs for "how to write real people and real interactions"?

Thanks! This is a really flattering question. I'll try to answer it honestly, because I wish someone had been brutally honest about this with me when I was a young writer.

I didn't go to school for writing. I started doing it when I was about nine years old. It sucked very badly. I kept writing throughout high school, and it still mostly sucked, but some of it was occasionally interesting. ("Interesting" here does not mean "good," by the way.) I took a break in college, and then came back. I've been writing ever since. Sometimes, I feel good about it. A lot of the time, I don't!

I hate giving this advice, because I remember how it feels to get it, and it's the most uninspiring, boring-ass, dog shit advice you can get, but it's also the only advice that is 100% unequivocally true: you have to write, and specifically, you have to write things that suck.

I do not mean that you should make things that suck on purpose. I mean that you have to sit down and try your absolute hardest to make something good. You have to put in the hours, the elbow grease, the blood, sweat, and tears, and then you have to read it over and accept that it just totally sucks. There is no way around this, and you should be wary of people who tell you there is. There is no trick, no rule, no book you can buy or article you can read, that will make your writing not suck. The best someone else can do is tell you what good writing looks like, and chances are, you knew that anyway — after all, you love to read. You wouldn't be trying to do this if you didn't. And anyone who says they can teach you to write so good it doesn't suck at first is either lying to you, or they have forgotten how they learned to write in the first place.

So the trick is to sit there in the miserable doldrums of Suck, write a ton, and learn to like it. Because this is the phase of your path as an artist when you find what it is you love about writing, and it cannot be the chance to make "good writing." This will be the thing that bears you through and compels you to keep going when your writing is shit, i.e., the very thing that makes you a writer in the first place. So find that, and you've got a good start.

Some people know this, but assume that perseverance as a writer is about trying to get to the point where you don't suck anymore. This is not true, and it is an actively dangerous lie to tell young writers. You are not aiming to feel like your writing doesn't suck. You are aiming to write. You are aiming to have written. Everything else is dust and rust. And of course, you'll find things you like about your pieces, you'll find things you're proud of, you'll learn to love the things you've made. But that little itch of self-criticism, in the back of your brain — the one that cringes when you read a clunky line, or thinks of a better character beat right after it's far too late to change — that's never going away. That's the Writer part of you. Read Kafka, read Dickens, read Tolstoy, you will find diary entries where they lament how absolutely fucking atrocious their writing was, and how angry they are that they can't do better. A good writer hates their sentences because they can always imagine better ones. And the ability to imagine a better sentence is what's going to make you pick up the pen again tomorrow. And the day after that. And the day after that.

Which is what I mean, and probably what all those other annoying, preachy advice-givers mean, when we say: a good writer is just someone who writes every day. It's that easy, and that hard.

#by the way a lot of this draws on ideas inspired by 'letters to a young poet' by rainer maria rilke if you're interested #that's a formative text for me as an artist #it won't teach you how to write but it will teach you how to think perhaps #and once you know how to think. well. life is just pretty good #and i can't say the writing gets easier but when life is pretty good i find myself enjoying it a lot more #this word vomit was prompted by the question 'how do you write real people and real interactions'#because that's like — i'm not trying to be pedantic but—#that's kind of just 'how do you write literature'?#because that's all literature is. what are human beings? how do you write a person? how do they interact with each other?#like shoutout to the void if you know for sure how to write real interactions then please for the love of god tell the rest of us #because i think most of all authors in history have just been giving it our best stab #'this is how the world looks for me. is it how the world looks for you?'#so my advice on that score is: try to see how the world looks for you #and then try to share it with me #don't worry about whether it looks the same for me. it won't

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setsugekka · 1 year

Text

『atarashī 』 ; 01

❝ birthday blues ❞ | mlist ｡

student!hongjoong x fem!reader, husband!yeosang x fem!reader — drama, dark romance, mystery, heavy sexual content [4,4k wc] ch cws: unprotected car sex, marital argument, general drama and angst because things suck.

"Happy birthday!"

The sound of bottles popping, your friends, family and colleagues cheering for you in celebration of another milestone—not as pleasant as some of the others, you've got to admit.

What's so happy about it?

Lackluster marriage, uninspiring job, nothing in particular that gives you reason to wake up bright eyed and ready for the day ahead of you each morning. Still, you force a smile; thank everyone for coming out and take a sip of champagne as pressed into your hands by your adoring and well-meaning husband.

"At least try to pretend you're having fun," he says, a murmur kept between the two of you only. "I've got to catch a flight soon, let's have a good end to the evening before I do."

You look up from the floor and towards Yeosang—suit pressed to perfection and long, wavy hair that you remember once upon a time really liking on him—it's not that you don't like it now, it's just that you have a hard time finding joy in much of anything nowadays.

"I am, I'm happy," you lie with a smile, and knowing perfectly well that he knows as much. Your husband won't argue with you on the fact, though. Maybe a few years ago, but not now. "I love you, thank you for putting this together."

"How does it feel to be thirty?" he asks with a glass pressed to his lips, the both of you standing off to the side and gazing out towards the crowd of people—all there for you.

Horrible, terrifying, boring, uneventful. Nothing. All at once, though you don't particularly want to answer with even one of them, so, you don't.

"The same." Not a lie, not really.

"Shall we go celebrate it then? Make it a little bit more special?" Yeosang's lips curl upwards, something mischievous. Birthmark on full display, you're happy that he didn't cover it up tonight—a small gift from him to you.

And you know precisely what he is intending by that. You want to shrug, but it's not the best answer to such a proposition.

Down the stairs and towards the car park the two of you go.

It's late enough in the evening that the garage is largely empty—a rented out office space used for your birthday party and long after hours for the majority of the employees that might otherwise be traversing the grounds. You're thankful for that, with the fog that has now collected upon the windows of your husband's luxury vehicle.

Yeosang's fingers are tightly planted into the flesh of your hips, mouths frequently finding one another in sloppy, poorly-attempted kisses as you grind your hips down against his lap in the backseat of his car. Certainly time better spent than upstairs, easier to forget about all of the things that you hate to acknowledge about this evening—about your life.

"Will you miss me?" he asks in a groan, pulling you down harder against him as best as he can. "I'm going to miss you."

You kiss him again, more intent behind this one than the others, because you will. Yeosang is often gone, it's been like this for years, and while you've mostly become accustomed to sleeping alone in your marital bed, there still lies within it a pang of displeasure that you've long since given up on voicing—having learned years prior that doing so will get you nowhere as far as his time spent home with you.

"Of course I will, I always do."

As if aroused by that fact alone, Yeosang's earnest grip firms even more, drags you along his length faster and with a goal in mind as his lips travel down from yours and instead go to work nipping and sucking small, light marks into the flesh of your neck just below. An airy moan escapes you, whispering to him that you're close, not to stop, that you love him; and Yeosang demands for you to come for him upon feeling the fact that you're reaching the precipice of doing so.

When you do, it's with fingers woven into his long, dark hair and his quiet chant against your skin that comes out as nothing but praise. Yeosang comes shortly thereafter—deep inside of you and with a contented sigh following.

Leaning back ever so slightly, you press a chaste kiss to his lips, and he smiles as a result of it.

"You're going to have to go back inside with quite a parting gift from me," he says, coyly referring to the mess left between your legs.

You frown. "You aren't coming back upstairs with me to say goodbye?"

"I just said goodbye," he answers. You can parse through it well enough a hint of contention despite his attempt in concealing it. Like he's anticipating a fight coming.

Lips straightening thin, you sigh and begin removing yourself from his lap—readjusting your undergarments and skirt in preparation for your walk of shame back up to the party. You don't want this to turn into a fight, not that it would be the first time in relation to situations such as this one.

Yeosang must notice the change in your demeanor in spite of your attempt to conceal it, because he lets out a similarly exasperated sigh; like it's a competition to see which one of you can be more disgruntled by the outcome of this particular happening.

"Don't be like that," he says. "Come on, do you really want to ruin tonight? On your birthday?"

On your birthday, as if that's meant to be some sort of bargaining chip from him to you. As if it's his party, his night, and you're harshing his good time.

"I didn't say anything, if you have to go then you have to go."

"Yeah, I do, so why are you acting like this? Do we have to do this every single time?"

You look back at him from over your shoulder, hand gripping the handle of the door and more than ready to escape the confines of his car now. Suffocating inside of it.

"I've long since given up trying to fight with you about this stuff. About having you around more, about you being more present. I've very much come to terms with the fact that you will come and go as you please, and that I have no other option than to shut up and deal with it."

"And I'm sure you hate the nice apartment, the nice car, the extra funding for the theater and ample, unchecked spending money that comes as a result of my lack of presence."

A couple of beats of silence pass between the two of you after that, you sigh first, then open the door and kick your feet out in order to begin your exit.

"It's not about the money, Yeosang. Not everything is about the money."

You watch him chuckle under his breath, as if the whole thing is exhaustingly comical to him. It probably is, because you've had this very same conversation so many times before. You're finding just as little joy in it as he is, and can't help but wonder if he has even considered as much.

Tucking himself back inside of his pants and tending to the buckle, he glances over at you.

"If you want me around more then we can move into one of the old storage rooms of the theater, clear out some space among the scrap wood and fabrics. Wouldn't that be nice?"

The sarcasm in his voice goes none appreciated by you, and as you stare it him quietly for a few moments’ time, you make peace with the fact that this conversation, like all others—is going nowhere useful.

"Have a good trip."

The car door shuts with an unintentional, but resoundingly loud bang.

You hope for a quiet re-entry, that no one has noticed you're gone or makes any assumptions about why that is. From behind the large door leading inside, you take a deep breath; center yourself so that you can put on a good enough mask, so that no one has to ask what's wrong.

It's been so long that you've been going back and forth with Yeosang about this, part of you is shocked that you even still have the capacity to feel about it at all.

The door pulls open, and with one step inside, your best friend is found awaiting your presence—perched steadfast right beside the opening and with two drinks in hand.

"Welcome back."

There's a particular look of knowing on Seonghwa's face as he says it—which makes sense, all things considered—and you take the glass from him that he gently extends towards you. A large sip follows in the silence that hangs between you, gazing out at the party while it carries on without you.

You can feel the reluctance wafting off of him from beside you, but with it comes the need to address the elephant in the room. There's no escaping this conversation, much like so many others.

"Yeosang left?"

"Flight to catch."

"Ah," he replies, simple enough. Takes a sip to cut the tension a little bit. "Well, it's the beginning of the school year, that's something to look forward to, isn't it?"

You hum, a nod accompanying it. "I've still got some loose ends to tie up before we start letting students into the theater, there's a leaky pipe backstage that I'm going to have to deal with before it becomes a much larger issue, but beyond that I'm mostly ready to have the place crawling with the usual artistic types. They're nice, sort of a joy to have around with how bright-eyed they are in comparison to me."

A chuckle carries from you at the tail end of the sentence, Seonghwa smiles at it, understands that it's part of the mask.

"Have you ever thought of giving the place up? Moving out of the city with Yeosang somewhere and just...settling down? I can't imagine you need the place all that much considering the hefty inheritance you were left."

You shrug, lifeless.

"We spent a lot of it on the wedding, another lot of it on the apartment—besides, it's the only thing I've really got left from my family. Hard to let go of such an heirloom, ya know? Besides, it keeps me busy when Yeosang is gone."

"Which is most of the time."

"Yeah."

Seonghwa kicks back the remaining liquid in his glass, you follow suit. He nudges towards the balcony as a silent request for him to follow you and you do so without so much as a question. The air is more brisk but clearer up here—far better than the outdoors of a stuffy parking garage.

You watch him take out a cigarette, playfully grimace at the sight of it as he lights it, but he only goes as far as to flash you a look that says don't bother with the dramatics.

"Is this just how it's going to be forever then?" Seonghwa asks plainly, curt. Like now that you're outside he's able to speak freely on the matter in a way that he couldn't before. "Your husband is always gone, you spend all your time tending to a bunch of uni students and a century year old theater hall? That's everything?"

You find yourself wondering much of the same.

He takes a drag of his cigarette before starting up again. "I know you gave up a lot to be with this guy, and I know you love him, but is this what you wanted? Can you live the rest of your life like this?"

"Hwa," you groan, a hand in the air to swat away the smoke that travels towards you, though that's far from the thing that irritates you the most about this interaction. "It's not like that. It's tough now but Yeosang's on track to retire early, and it'll all be worth it then."

"Yeah, if you two make it to then."

That makes you reel, a look of slight disgust towards him for so much as suggesting such a thing, and while Seonghwa tends to be steadfast in his approach, even he is willing to resign himself to perhaps going too far with this one.

"Look, all I'm saying is that this is far from the first time we've had nights like this. I know you want to be happy, but wanting to be happy and actually being happy are two vastly different things, and I worry about how long you're willing to stick it out through the misery in hopes that there's a light at the end of the tunnel. I mean, you already resent him for being absent so much."

That is true.

A strong exhale escapes you and you motion towards your friend for him to give you something. He understands it well enough—hands you his cigarette which you quickly drag from and give right back—make a face of regret at the taste and smell.

"What do you suggest then?" you ask, though not actually expecting to receive anything of merit in doing so. "Divorce my husband, move out of the city, take a two hour commute there and back everyday just so that I can clean up scraps left by the thespian kids?"

"You should tell them to clean up after themselves for one, they're all adults," Seonghwa says seriously. "But no, I'm not suggesting that. I know you won't, though people certainly do have a funny way of creating excitement in their lives where complacency otherwise resides and it is not often felt without its fair share of problems alongside."

"There isn't really any excitement to create," you insist lazily, motioning towards the door to head back inside once and for all. "But who knows, maybe this year one of the classes will do something especially fun, like West Side Story. I like West Side Story."

"Alright everyone, gather 'round!"

The voice comes through loud and somewhat shrill from somewhere in the crowd of people that you can't quite place. It's difficult to pinpoint who, exactly, says what over the murmur of sounds from a large grouping of students as they look at their new surroundings and talk amongst themselves about all of the hopes they anticipate to have play out within these walls over the next however many years that they partake in their programs.

From aspiring actors, to writers, to costume designers—a plethora of students that wish to watch their dreams come alive before them and among their peers with similar goals—for some it might be their first year embarking on such a journey, and for others, somewhere between the middle and end.

Aurelia Hall; renowned amongst many for the years upon years of stunning architecture and plethora of talents that have come and gone from these numerous hallways and stage setups. A reputation to produce only the best—that studying at the Akademiya far from the goal, and rather—it is the ability to be blessed by Aurelia in doing so that has so many hopefuls shuffling in their applications to attend the school.

There is no magic here; though the way in which people speak of it might have one thinking otherwise. If you study at Aurelia, success is sure to find you. Words that you've heard spoken between students over so many years that you've found yourself mouthing along in silence to them.

A gentle laugh to yourself, where is your success then?

So you stand with arms crossed at the very back end of the main theater as everyone says their introductions and puts on something of a performance in doing so. It comes naturally to most, you can imagine; a small pleasure coming from the fact that the group of students appears to be smaller this year despite a mixture of all levels as it always is. First years and fourth years all mingling on the first day as if it's the schoolyard playground.

You smile ever so slightly, until you feel the presence of another body coming up just behind.

"Can I speak to you for a moment?"

One of the professors from some class, you've hardly been able to keep track despite the year after year that you meet them and pretend to remember from the last. Hardly your fault, that's what you tell yourself at least, on account of the fact that this is very likely to be the last time that you speak to this person until the year after this one.

The staff make themselves seldom known within the halls—their craft largely gifted to the students under their care within the walls of the Akademiya, then the underlings are released unto the care of you—something to that effect. A student body comprised of adults who need little to no supervision of any kind and are happy to keep to their own; discussing ideas and sketching out plans in small bubbles of similar minds.

You're not often needed past the first week, once everyone figures out where the smaller theater rooms and the bathrooms are located.

Following the staff member out into the hallway and closing the door behind for just a bit more privacy, your eyes rake over the man as he thumbs through a file, landing on a page and pushing it in front of you for you to glance over yourself.

"There's a fourth year student who will be joining us, though it's his first year at the Akademiya. He's a transfer from elsewhere, and really—"

"This is more like his sixth year," you say, finishing the sentence for him. He nods, knowingly. "Why hasn't he graduated?"

"Difficult to say, I haven't had much time with him, obviously, as the year has only just started. He seems bright from what I can gather in such a short amount of time, but I get the inkling of a feeling that he is largely uninspired, burnt out, having a hard time getting the final pieces together. The transcripts from his last school say that he didn't even bother turning anything in for his final project, and in fact, he disappeared without a trace for weeks until he finally put in a formal request to transfer."

Fascinating, but bizarre. Your eyebrows pull together, a strangeness collecting on your face.

"I'm surprised the Akademiya even accepted him with a track record like that, unlike the governing body."

"His portfolio is good, really impressive, so I assume that's why," the man says with a sigh and a shrug. "I guess it's up to us to drag the last little bit we can from the guy and get him out of here and into the world."

"Us? I'm no teacher, I don't know the first thing about guiding anyone."

Head cocking to the side and gifting you a half-smile, the man closes the file and nods towards the door once again.

"You're in charge when they're here, and I'm in charge when they're with me. You come from a long line of artists, if you hadn't then you wouldn't be running this place. Surely you've picked up something about the arts in your time?"

Yes, though not something you're all that eager to revisit if not necessarily required of you.

The man pulls ahead, opens the door to the theater and saunters inside. You follow him along the way over perfectly steamed red carpet and past numerous students who are none too interested in the fact that either of you are accompanying them within their creative spaces. Up the wooden steps to the side of the stage and then past the navy blue curtain, despite the darkness and the faint scent of moisture that you're certainly going to have to continue to tend to as a result of that damned leaky pipe, you're faced with the sight of one man, by himself, with hands busy at work.

You and the professor stand in place in silence as you look upon the student; messy brown hair and even while sitting on the floor with legs crossed, you can tell he's not especially tall. There's a dress form in front of him, though it's well out of reach as he works with busy hands and a pile of fabric in his lap that keeps all of his attention—none spared for either of you.

"Costuming?" you ask the man beside you in a lean, eyes still fixed onto the sight ahead of you. It feels stupid speaking of him as if he's not within earshot, then compounded by the way his head finally does turn towards where you stand with narrow, questioning eyes.

Your colleague nods, but the person ahead answers aloud for him. "Yes. Costuming."

"Sorry," you say, nearly fumbling even just the single word in response to him. "I—didn't want to interrupt you."

He sighs then, tosses his head back as if reluctantly resigned to having to engage in this whole thing at all. Sets his work aside and crawls to his feet to make his way towards the two of you.

The two of you meet eyes, and it lingers a bit longer than it might normally. Something strange, something intriguing about this student in particular—fascinating.

Extending a hand for pleasantries, he introduces himself. "Kim Hongjoong. Seventh year costuming student, but who's counting?"

"It's six according to your file." The man beside you begins thumbing through again, as if looking for what it is that he missed the first few times.

The student—Hongjoong—smiles. "Did a year at a school off in Hong Kong, bombed out so spectacularly that we agreed to not bother even adding it onto the transcript, so aside from the memories, it's as if I never existed there at all."

You can't help but find yourself stunned at the nonchalance in which he speaks on such things. Schools like these—schools like the Akademiya—are nothing to be scoffed at or played with, entry to them is extremely limited and some people go their whole lives dreaming for a shot at just one; this guy has flown through at least three, and with nothing to show for it, at that.

A feeling of judgment washes over you, catching yourself looking down your nose at him for being such a magnificent failure. It's not who you want to be, and you make an effort to correct the thoughts before they fester any longer in your mind.

The two of you shake hands—soft skin and you can't help but take notice of the single pinky painted black—a statement piece, something to be noticed.

"I take it you're going to be trouble then," you say plainly, wanting it to come off as something of a joke but meaning it just as much as well. Hongjoong huffs out a quiet laugh at the mere mention of it, as if asinine to even assume as much.

"The only person I've ever been trouble for is myself. If you're afraid I'm going to tear this place up or cause any of my peers any kind of harm, then I can put your mind at ease that that's never been the reasoning behind my removals—be it self-imposed or by the administration board."

"Then what is the reason, if you don't mind me asking?" the man besides you pipes up, having given up on the paperwork in hand.

Hongjoong sighs, slips his hands into torn up jean pockets and rocks back onto his heels once or twice before finally resigning himself to simply answering the question as laid out before him. You're curious as well, though you might not have had the gall to ask it so brazenly as your colleague has.

"Suppose I'm my own worst enemy," Hongjoong says, a lazy shrug accompanying the words. "I'm not a psychologist, but a psychologist would probably say that I have self-destructive tendencies."

"Have you ever seen a psychologist?" you ask then, interest piqued by his willingness to self-diagnose in such a shameless way.

"Now that you're not allowed to ask," he says with a playful tone. Uncaring of the question or its privacy to him, but rather using it as a way to chide you effortlessly.

You back down immediately, and your colleague steps up in your stead.

A grin forms on Hongjoong's lips meanwhile.

"Well, back at the Akademiya, I'll be more than happy to do what it takes to finally get you graduated and out onto the next step of your career. File says you're twenty-five, so I can't imagine you're thrilled to be spending your time around a bunch of barely-twenties, either."

"I tend to keep to myself regardless of the age, so it's unimportant to me."

The answer makes you want to roll your eyes, you stifle the desire out of respect.

"If you need anything, don't hesitate to contact me. You have my phone number as well as my email, and for when you're here—"

There's a beat of silence that comes between the three of you, your eyes glancing to the side to meet the man speaking, and then once more falling towards Hongjoong as he stands in front.

"You'll be answering to the groundskeeper, she'll try to accommodate you to the best of her abilities."

Hongjoong's eyebrow perks upwards, seemingly intrigued by that. "Do you act?"

Not what you expected, and it takes you back just a bit, hands flying up in a visual display of putting a stop to the assumption. "No, no! Nothing like that. I've inherited the place from my great grandparents after their passing."

"But you're familiar with the arts."

Persistent, isn't he?

The answer is yes, though it's something you've long since learned to put aside for much more practical engagements and a husband none too keen.

"I'm...familiar, yes." Whatever that means.

Hongjoong doesn't reply further, though his eyes linger on you a bit longer than you'd like for them to. A discomfort in how forward he is, not at all what you might have anticipated when first laying your sights upon him.

"Perfect then," the man beside you says. "We'll be on our way, and I'll see you tomorrow at the Akademiya."

"Yup," Hongjoong says, though you can't help but catch the hint of something hidden within the tone of his voice. You can't put your finger on it, though even after you turn your back to him, you know his gaze remains on your form.

"See you around."

a/n: weeee excited to have this one started! reminder that if you wish to discuss the story with me, the ask box is the best way to do it! another reminder that this story is going to get ugly and dive into some stuff that a lot of people are going to get squicked out about. those things have been clearly warned. until next time, cheers! xo

#hongjoong smut #yeosang smut #ateez smut #hongjoong x reader #hongjoong x you #hongjoong x y/n #hongjoong imagines #hongjoong scenarios #hongjoong fanfic #yeosang x reader #yeosang x y/n #yeosang x you #yeosang imagines #yeosang scenarios #ateez x reader #ateez scenarios #ateez imagines #ateez fanfic #yeosang fanfic

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nuzzle · 6 months

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Hi~

I saw your post about how lolita fashion (and ads for it) have changed in the last few years, especially for Angelic Pretty, and I agree completely!

I think the lack of creative ads these days might be b/c Gothic & Lolita Bible isn't around anymore? (cries) and Kera went purely digital ages ago, I don't know if it's even still around (I should have kept my old Kera magazines). But I remember how I always used to look forward to seeing the clothes and layouts that were featured in the new issues of each magazine.

My favorite when I first got into lolita was from the Wedding issue of the English edition of GLB; a model for Baby was wearing a lovely, tulip print skirt (or was it the jsk?) in blue, holding a parasol and sitting at a cafe table. Something about her looked so sweet and simple; I wanted to be a lolita just like that!

The models in the magazines always looked like they were happy or having fun, which I think is part of what made me want certain dresses or blouses. In AP's current ads, the model just looks... kinda sad and pouty and bored. I've noticed that for a lot of their dresses, they've been skimping on the lace, frills, and ribbons, and there's no more cute hair styles either! Meanwhile, wasn't it AP that brought lolita from old school to New School / OTT sweet when they had models wearing pastel pink / blue wigs for their Mermaid Symphony (iirc) photoshoot back in 2007?

On a different, but kinda related note, I've noticed that in the past 5 years or so AP has been making a lot of dresses with ridiculously high waists.... also so many sack dresses (I know they started doing this back in like 2012 or so with that polka-dot M&M print dress)

Sorry for the long rant, I just really miss the old days of lolita fashion

hello there!

i'm always glad to have some feedback when i post rambles and thoughts on things. i never expect it, so thank you for your input! it's also comforting to know others feel the same way.

i agree that without as many publications in general (especially physical) there's less of a reason to put as much effort into details, like the magazine spreads that were commonly done for example. most people get information on releases online these days, making physical catalogs a bit obsolete.. aside from collectors. i greatly miss all of the graphics and how inspirational everything felt back then, especially the little PNG pictures of items in catalogs.

you're completely right about pictures from GLB's and other magazines looking generally "happier" and more like daily life sort of pictures, like the one in the cafe you mention. that aspect of it appealed greatly to lifestyle lolitas! seeing a dress pictured in a "real life" situation rather than just a plain white background photoshoot picture makes a huge difference. it brings it to life, and makes it a lot easier to see yourself wearing it.

i think a big change in marketing is that AP doesn't cater as much to lifestylers.. and lolitas who are very much interested in the fashion beyond a surface level and see them as more than just clothes. all of the photos now actually feel like advertisements, when they used to also be appealing from a photography perspective. like they're only trying to sell you a product and not an experience, even if only visual. for me, that takes away from it a lot.. it almost feels as though that sense of community, and the acknowledgement that lolita is a subculture, is dwindling.

plus, it's definitely more than just presentation that's changed as you said. i feel as though the designs AP offers have been super uninspired compared to old releases. not as many details, not as much custom lace, and the general silhouettes becoming a bit lazy.. tons more, but i could go on for days. even the revamp and progression of the lyrical bunny mascot has felt a bit soulless. very sad to see, because i do agree that they were the brand to introduce OTT sweet in a revolutionary way.

as much as i gripe about old vs new AP changes, the positive side is that we can still look back fondly on the old era!

and no problem at all! it was nice to hear another perspective on this. ^^

#asks

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liminal-space-lesbian · 10 months

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Loser

Pairing: Enid Sinclair x fem!reader

Summary: You've had a crush on Enid for the longest time, but she was with Ajax. Ajax, who was boring and uninspiring and not thoughtful at all. You couldn't help but feel jealous, knowing you could treat her better than him.

Warnings: unrequited love, jealousy / envy, Ajax slander

Words: 910

Part Two // Part Three // Part Four

Enid Sinclair.

The perfect girl.

She's bubbly, loyal, easygoing, funny, and not afraid to stand up for what's right. She's gorgeous, inside and out. Her cute dyed hair, her pretty blue eyes, her smile- God her smile.

She's everything.

And he's just... him.

He's... a loser. Just some Stoner kid with the personality of a wheat thin. Him and his stupid hoodies, him and his stupid dumb smile and stupid laugh. Why, why, why did Enid like him? He was rather boring, not much to offer conversationally. He was attractive you supposed, but not that attractive. Maybe he was a good kisser? God, you really didn't want to think of him kissing Enid.

It was all so unfair. Why couldn't she see him for what he was? He's just a loser. Some kid, with nothing special or particularly interesting about him. Hell, on their first date he stood her up, and didn't even bother telling her why! You would never have done that to her.

If only she saw you. She'd maybe realize....

You'd do anything for her- move heaven and earth- anything she asked. You'd get her flowers every week, make sure to get her favorites and not just red roses like Ajax. You knew Enid was partial to peonies. You also knew she didn't like dark chocolate, unlike Ajax who always bought her assorted chocolates. You knew she hated pineapple on pizza, you knew her favorite artist was Lana Del Rey, you knew her favorite color was pink but she also favored yellow. She preferred gold jewelry, she only liked her coffee sweet, and she never ate pancakes for breakfast ever since she had the stomach flu when she was twelve.

But Ajax- that stupid boy- didn't know hardly any of these simple things about his own girlfriend. He buys her silver jewelry, Taylor Swift albums, dark chocolate- all the little things he should notice he just doesn't.

But you do.

And yet.... Enid sees Ajax and not you.

You suppose that makes you bitter and jealous. Probably toxic to some degree as you glare at them during lunch, while Enid sits in Ajax's lap, telling him about her day as he gazes at her with glazed over eyes. 'Is he even listening?' You think bitterly as you clench your jaw, suddenly losing your appetite.

"Jeez, I'm not a fan of Ajax either, but you look like you're trying to blow him up with your mind. You good, girl?" Yoko asks as she takes a seat next to you, stealing a french fry off your tray. You push your tray towards her, no longer hungry as you see Ajax and Enid begin making out.

"Yeah I'm just peachy." You say drily as you pry your gaze away from the two to look at Yoko, who looks unimpressed. She heaves a sigh and rubs her forehead wearily.

"Listen, I know you've had a thing for Enid for like, years, but you really need to let it go. She has a boyfriend and it doesn't look like they're breaking up any time soon. There's so many other girls too! Don't miss an opportunity just because you're so hung up on Enid." Yoko says, her voice slightly uncertain as she speaks, a hint of worry in her tone. You knew somewhere in the back of your mind Yoko was just trying to be a good friend, and you knew she was probably right. Your heart however didn't care, bitterness and envy swelling in your chest like acid.

"I don't want other girls. I don't care about other girls. Enid is just- she's different. There's nobody like her, shes so sweet, and pretty and smart and warm. And loyal! I mean look what she did for Wednesday last year!" You huff angrily as you look back towards Enid, seeing her and Ajax now standing and saying their farewells, Enid giving Ajax a big hug and a kiss before happily skipping away. 'I wish she hugged me like that.'

"I know... but still it's not healthy to keep pining after her like this. She just... doesn't see you like that." Yoko said gently, her gaze soft as she tried to catch your gaze. You felt a familiar squeezing in your chest at her words.

"I know but... I don't think I can help it." You say softly as you look down at your tray. standing up and taking it with you, dumping the rest of your food in the trash before heading to your next class, ignoring the lump in your throat.

How could you think such cruel things about Ajax anyways? Why must jealousy burn you up from the inside? Why couldn't you just be happy for Enid? She seemed pleased enough in her relationship. So what if she wasn't with you, so long as she was happy, right? You just couldn't help but feel she would be happier with you. Such a selfish thing to think.

In the end, Ajax was with Enid, not you.

Perhaps you were the one who was a loser.

#enid sinclair x reader #enid sinclair #wednesday tv series #unrequited love #jealousy

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terraco-07 · 2 months

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I find the posts claiming that Rose and Jade were in character for their current series of actions interesting to say the least. Personally I can't help but see them far and away out of their original characterization, but I'll focus primarily on Rose here. I think it's really easy for us to forget the original comic when looking at subsequent works and forget the foundational information that informs us of who a character is. I'm sorry but less than a thousand pages of Epilogues and HS2 isn't going to tell you as much as 8k and the writers SHOULD be looking at the original and plotting off of that even if they were teens in it. When writing a sequel (Whether canon or not) the original matters! That all said when I look back at Rose on the meteor I see someone who let her nerves and her fear of failure and being alone propel her forward at all times. This girl got so nervous about impressing Kanaya that she was wasted and missed their first date. She's insecure and fearful that Kanaya might break up with her on the meteor as well. The way that scene went down and Kanaya yelling no to me reads as this wasn't the first time Rose has asked that. Regardless you take all of that and you add the fact that candy Rose was talking to John about how happy she was and how much she loved her wife and kid and we go from that to well I knew you'd forgive me and honestly I just wanted to see what would happen while Kanaya is actively going "You do remember you said a kid between those three would be horrible and you didn't like Jade right?" We have no reason to believe that Kanaya is an unreliable narrator here, if anything Rose more than likely is. The idea that Rose just went oh man my good bestie Jade wants me to cheat on my loving wife of over 10 years and went yeah sure anything for my friend is laughably bad I'm sorry. If that's actually a course of action being taken by the writers I genuinely question if we're writing this for a 5th grade reading level. HS2 has at times been a series of flatting characters into their most basic forms and I'm so tired of seeing this parroted by fans who take the most surface level shit and run with it without thinking a little deeper. I feel like I've gone over this before but making Rose into this sort of cold emotionless villain type is so uninspired while we're at it. We're creating problems for her when she had ten other things she could have been shitty for. The knew you'd forgive me line is especially egregious for some shallow anime villain type. I will say Rose is bad at communication I agree with those points, but that ignores the main issue. She's bad at talking about her feelings but she isn't bad at caring about Kanaya's. The idea that she would throw away or risk her relationship EVEN with the visions is kind of insane to me. Her fear of losing Kanaya would overweigh the trust in her powers. I think that Rose like a handful of other characters is just chronically misread and people are excited about an evil plotline but this is so half baked and the idea that she was always like this or this makes sense with her previous characterization is just actually insane to me. Look HS2 fans you can have your new Rose, but that's a different person I think we can all play nice under that assumption.

#homestuck #Rose Lalonde #HSBC #HS2 #upd8 #Kanaya Maryam #Jade Harley #The arc is both ooc and sucks ass there's nothing more to be said about it #Originally penned by a cuck happy loser and the fact that it's happening to our only endgame wlw ship?#Come on

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wowbright · 5 months

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Fic: Authority

Fandom: Glee, Kurt/Blaine

Event: december klaine fanworks challenge 2023

Words: ~ 900 words

Rating: Teen and Up

Summary: In 2015, the Lima bishop tries to ruin the Hummels’ Christmas. Kurt won’t let him.

Notes: This is part of my Mormon!Klaine universe. It takes place after Out of Eden, which I am still in the process of posting to AO3. Should you read this if you’re waiting to see what happens in Out of Eden? IDK. But what I can say is this might be part of Kurt and Blaine’s in-verse “canon” future, or it might just be one of many possible futures. Fanfic of fanfic, if you will.

Kurt didn't want to be fatalistic. He didn't want to assume the worst of people. He was trying to learn at least that much from Blaine.

But he wasn't naive. And the signs pointed toward a confrontation: The new, uninspired policy, of course. Elder Nelson declaring that it was a revelation from God—the same Elder Nelson who believed that God was incapable of loving unconditionally, and therefore could not be trusted to tell God or God’s revelations from the inane clamorings of his own ego. The bishop’s questions to Kurt’s dad after the wedding invitations went out. Kurt’s membership records still being held up in Lima, even though his new bishop in L.A. had put a request in several times to get them transferred to the new ward and was just as frustrated as Kurt over the delay.

Still, he had hoped the Lima bishop believed enough in the sacredness of family that he wouldn't inject himself into Kurt’s visit home for Christmas.

He had hoped, but he hadn't assumed. So when he went out for the mail on Christmas Eve and saw the ward secretary’s car parked across the street, he knew what was happening. He headed straight for the driver side window and knocked. “You do realize you two look like stalkers, don't you?”

The ward secretary smiled as he got out of the car. He held a business-size envelope in his hand. “Sorry to startle you. We just got here and were taking a moment to pray first.” On the other side, the bishop’s second counselor emerged.

“So, did it work?” Kurt said.

“I’m sorry?” the ward secretary said.

“Did the prayer work? Did you convince God that you’re doing the right thing? Or at least convince your own conscience?”

“Kurt,” the ward secretary frowned. “This brings me no joy. You've been called to a disciplinary council.” He held the letter out for Kurt.

“Merry Christmas to you, too,” Kurt said. “But you can keep that.”

“I’m required to give it to you.”

“I’m not required to take it.”

The ward secretary stepped forward. He put a hand on Kurt’s front coat pocket and made to shove the envelope in it.

Kurt stepped back. “Watch it. That's assault.”

“Kurt—” The second counselor chimed in. “We want to help you. The church has clarified that those who enter into same-sex marriage are in apostasy. But you haven’t done it yet. The disciplinary council is an opportunity for you to change course. You've been such an important member of our ward. I've always been inspired by your faith and your commitment to the truth. But this is a blind spot for you. And maybe it is for me, too—the natural man in me keeps questioning it and wondering why it has to be this way. But that’s why we have prophets and apostles—because we can’t trust our own feelings. And they have spoken. Elder Nelson said it was a revelation—”

“Elder Nelson is in apostasy,” Kurt said.

The two brothers looked as if they'd just been bitten by a snake.

But they hadn’t. Kurt was the one who had been bitten, over and over again, and now these two representatives of the priesthood were here to bite him once more in the name of God. And he was tired of it. “Elder Nelson usurped the prophet. Did President Monson tell us this policy change was a revelation? Have any of the other apostles confirmed it? No. It’s unclear if they were all even there to vote on it. And if it is revelation? True revelation? Then he would bring it to the next general conference for a vote of common consent, because our scriptures themselves tell us that a revelation is only true for the whole church and can only bind the whole membership of the church if we have a chance to vote on it. But we haven't had that chance, and there's no sign that he's planning to give us that chance. He thinks he can just say a thing is a revelation and we're all supposed to fall in line? What is that, if it's not apostasy?”

They continued to stare at Kurt. Then, the ward secretary spoke up. “Kurt, don’t make this worse.”

Kurt laughed. “How could something I do possibly make this worse? The bishop sends you out as his goons on Christmas Eve, away from your families, to come to my father’s home and threaten me with excommunication—which, if you actually believe everything Elder Nelson says, will separate me from dad and my mother and Carole and Finn and the rest of my family for all of eternity. Is that the Christmas present you wanted to deliver to my father? Is that your idea of Christlike love? Because it's not what I was taught in Sunday school, and it's not what the scriptures say. And you can keep that letter. I'm not going to come to a disciplinary council held by a bishop in a ward where I don't even live anymore and plead for forgiveness because I refuse to forsake the best gifts that this church has given me: love and grace, charity and forgiveness. Even of this bishop who is trying so hard to make himself my enemy. I feel sorry for him, that this is what he thinks God wants him to do. That he thinks God's love is conditional. That he thinks the love I have for Blaine, one of the greatest gifts God has ever given me, is depraved. That he thinks he has the power to separate me from my family and the people I love in the eternities. It’s so sad, and I pray for him every day that he will stop living in fear. I pray for him, and I love him. But I don’t recognize his authority over me.”

#plead #december klaine challenge 2023 #mormon!klaine #wowbright writes fic #klaine fic #klaine fanfic #klaine fanfiction #day 1: plead

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sillyfairygarden · 1 year

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fairy once more 🌹 my c!hannah design is complete, full design process is under the cut :)

wrow it has been like 1.5 yr since my first c!hannie drawing 😭 ourgh i love her sosososo much. i really went back n forth on whether or not to actually complete this design, due to my... complicated and strenuous relationship with the dsmp... but after talking it out and going through these pieces i wanted to do it justice one last time :)

without further ado here is a (near-complete) history of my c!hannahxxrose design. i have included text descriptions since my handwriting is notoriously doctoral (bad):

DESIGN EVOLUTION:

In the beginning the design was very simple, and leaned heavily into the popular fanon. [pointing at image of c!hannah with leafy, thick foliage leaves from fall 2021: this was drawn before the event where c!hannah got her wings, aka i'm psychic teehee]

(i didn't really know much about her character, so these aren't tied to the canon and got scrapped!)

[pointing to a design of c!hannah with fairy wings from early 2022: this simple dress was a staple in my early design...]

Post-Elytramaggedeon:

her wings! i think when she lost them, it really drew me into pinning down a design for her. i toyed with the imagery of torn, tattered wings, but then turned to a more melted look. i love the multicolour spread of her wings, through over time her wing shape changes from a butterfly wing to a more dragonfly/fairy-style.

i toyed with the idea of her wings being torn off completely, but at the end it was more true to the imagery to have these massive, multicoloured wings, useless and tattered.

[text beneath a c!tinarose piece from march 2022: first time drawing c!tinarose B) very uninspired outfits. also, why does c!tina have little wings??? The line "he ripped your rings, my little fairy :(" lives in my head rent-free. I wasn't happy with how this came out.]

[text beneath a c!tinarose piece from july 2022: genuinely one of the best pieces i've ever done. c!tinarose nation 4 lyfe ✌️ Really nailed the melty, shredded wing design here!

Design Exploration:

While working on those [above] pieces in 2022, i started exploring different ideas for my c!hannah design.

[text pointing to a sketch from september 2022, where c!hannah has a large, tree-like arm: in this, c!hannah is a flower nymph whose body is apart of nature--the tree arm is borne! i LOVE asymmetrical designs. In my notes, i wrote: 'she draws her energy from nature to heal after losing her wings- in return, nature returns to claim her body... as time goes on, the bark grows.]

Concept: pre-DSMP design:

[text pointing to a sketch of c!hannah kneeling, hair wild with flowers and covered in climbing vines: a rosebush who becomes a girl-in her early days, she is more plant-like than human girl! i loved this hair. so fun.]

Introduction of Armour:

[text beneath multiple drawings of c!hannah from summer 2022, where she is wearing armour: in these sketches, i was feeling the urge to draw some armoured ladies-and so c!hannah became my victim!

i'm always craving sleek, feminine silhouettes in my armoured designs, without turning into battle corsets and bikinis.

at the same time as this, i was in the brainstorming/conceptual stages for other dsmp characters, and i wanted c!hannah to be unique from the generic, full-netherite design.]

Final Design:

A year and a half after my first art of her, and i collected the varying design elements from past pieces into one final concept!

Knightly yet feminine, strong but still wearing (literally) the scars of pain. I wasn't confident in ever finishing this, but then i heard that she gets her wings back after the 2023 """finale""" of the smp... it was time to bring closure to this character design that i have poured a whole part of myself into. This was the final sketch.

[text near a sketch of c!hannah's final design: flower spirit, mix armoured with flowers (utena core).]

for the final piece itself, i wanted to reference the colours of hannah's minecraft skin, while still adding that fantasy-knight element. the wings are trimmed, but still retained that beautiful, multicolour melty look. her tree arm is finally blossoming and blooming with pops of colour, to signify regrowth after the trauma of losing a piece of herself. her insignia is not for any nation, but for herself.

References:

The works of these illustrators greatly guided this design. Additionally, my peers and other artists who have drawn/interpreted c!hannah before <3 feminine, strong designs are so beautiful!

[not pictured are the works of JC Leyendecker, Jasmin Darnell, CLAMP, Thores Shibamoto, and my dear friend zma. their works orbit my head like a ceiling fan whenever i put the pen to paper <3)

a few things didn't end up making the cut (the cape from the final sketch, her other forms and ideas for pre-SMP, etc) but at this point, i am really excited to just stop looking at this piece LOL. it has been staring at me for forever. im very pleased with it and touched something special at seeing my own abilities, ambition, and concept designs grow within my own work. even if no one reads all 213445345 words of this, it's a wonderful capsule of the work i put into this design and im quite pleased.

aneeeways if any1 read this far i hope u like it 🙇 ok im going eepy now gnight ^^

#dsmp #dream smp #dsmp art #hannahxxrose #hannahxxrose fanart #c!hannah #c!hannahxxrose #mcyt #mcyt fanart #thellos art corner #i can talk about this piece Forever. in case its not very obvi. ok ok ok im eepying now i swear

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luveline · 3 days

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I'm sorry to send you such a loaded question, but as a young adult, how do you stay motivated and... I don't know, do the things you have to do? Ever since I left high school, I've felt that it's hard to commit to anything, especially the things I have to commit to in order to have a future, because everything seems so monotonous and uninteresting and stressful to me; because I feel like I'm not capable of doing anything, of being competent.

Anyways, I love your blog. Your writings are one of the few things that make me happy on the worst days xx

that’s okay! I’m gonna try and answer you clearly !! cw for suicide mention

So first I want to say that I’m really sorry you feel this way! It’s quite a heart ache to feel uninspired or uninterested, or worse to feel like you’re not capable of doing things everyone else is doing. You deserve to wake up and feel happy and confident in yourself and your abilities! And I want to say I’m sorry in advance if this is not quite the answer you’re asking me for!

so, when I was around 18/19 (and well beyond those years, but this was when I was very done and defeated and, you know, crying myself sick every night if I wasn’t just laying in bed) I was in university, but I didn’t finish the year at campus, and I had to go home. I’m not sure if this is something I should be saying because it’s so personal but I just want to sort of be honest with you cos I don’t want you to think you’re alone in that feeling. But anyways I had to go home, I was really lonely and I just felt like I couldn’t do what everyone else was doing, like there was something wrong with me. I couldn’t cope with the kitchen, I couldn’t use the bathroom there, I didn’t know how to turn the heating on, couldn’t talk to people, couldn’t navigate the bus by myself, and I felt so pathetically stupid, I had such low self esteem for myself that I felt like I should kill myself just because I was so useless —I didn’t WANT to understand these things. I just didn’t want to do anything. And the reason I’m mentioning it is because while I don’t think it’s okay to assume these things of you, I want to emphasise that there can be a common link between feeling like you aren’t capable and a mental health issue! Of course, you can feel quite useless without that though, so not telling you that that’s definitely what you have going on but more wanting to say that if you think it might be useful, you can have a look at mental health issues and perhaps see if you’re relating to them. But beyond that, hopefully on the way to answering your question, is how I managed to feel more capable and how I now find motivation to do things I have to do.

I sort of had to do a reset, or a sabbatical! I’ve always been an upset person unfortunately, and I had a long few months where I didn’t do anything at all. I’m really, really fortunate that my mother let me stay at home while this was happening however reluctant she was, I can’t imagine really what I would’ve done or what could’ve happened to me if she didn’t let me stay there. I always thought about how she could’ve just turned me out and she probably wanted to, because for months I stayed in bed. I didn’t talk to anybody, deleted all my social media, and I stewed in how much I hated myself for not being any good at anything. I felt soooo stupid and so alone, and I probably cried myself to sleep every night wondering about my life and if I’d ever have the motivation to go on. There are still times now where I am intensely upset and unsure about things and what I’m capable of, but the difference between then and now, and the reason for my motivation I think, was that I was able to foster a need for something? I’m really so sorry if this sounds like total total nonsense, but I needed something. I wanted so badly for someone to “save me” from my not being able to do things, I spent a lot of time thinking about that. Like, how I could be saved. And then I strung out the middle man without realising I was doing it! It is very hard to go from having no motivation and no sense of self ability to then being confident, but I do think you can do it! I needed someone to get me a job and I ended up doing it myself, I needed someone to be gentle with me when I was sad so I started speaking to myself with a more kind inner voice and seeing myself as someone who didn’t need to be perfect to be good.

There was lots of bits of advice I tried to take on. Not all of it is kind to myself, some of it is though!! Like, for example, there’s a sort of parody of it now that says “I think you’re thinking about yourself too much” but one of the ways I stopped hating myself and instead started to believe I could do things and achieve was by thinking about the level of self obsession I was feeling to constantly think of myself. And I promise I’m not trying to say something hurtful to you, I absolutely don’t believe you’re self obsessed, but you’re also not incapable!! In a slightly more annoying take on your feelings, why can’t you do it if everyone else can? You absolutely can! I personally believe sweetheart that you can do everything I can, but you need more support, or you need to be fostered with some love. You are not incapable, you are not incompetent, you are a smart, kind, and important person. There is nobody else like you on the entire planet and I’m better for it that you’re here.

I apologise profusely if I’m projecting too much on you, I’m not trying to say you must feel exactly as I did years ago, but I think your ask really is important and I really want to give you an answer to your question because I know I felt exactly the same at some point. Working toward a future self I didn’t even like or believe in was boring. Nothing in me wanted to work hard or study or continue because I didn’t look forward to achievement.

sorry this is all so long! Hopefully this last bit is the actual advice you might be able to use. Beyond that wisdom about trying not to dedicate too much time to thinking of myself, there are lots of “rules” I tend to live by, in order to just keep going forward. For starters, you deserve to have fun. You deserve good food, nice clothes (not showy though you deserve those too, but nice sturdy clothing), a warm safe house, and you need to work for it! We defo deserve to work less for things but I keep going and trying to better myself because I know I need to do this in order to be comfortable. This will sound out of left field, because the focus of the book is not strictly motivation, but there’s a graphic novel called my lesbian experience with loneliness by Nagata Kabi that has stuck with me because she has this same sort of view as to feeling like she’s stuck in monotony, and there’s one bit in particular where she talks about doing things for yourself you might not do, I.e making sure you have underwear and socks that are clean and whole. I grew up poor and I’m not super rich now either, but since I read that, one of my priorities is having whole and clean underwear, and that did help me find the motivation to work or to study. We need to function in a way to maintain good standards for ourselves, and even if you have boxes of clean socks, there might be something in your life you can think about working toward! I throw away underwear or any clothes that don’t fit me right, and I don’t feel guilty about it when I would’ve before because I know that feeling well dressed is good for your heart. Does that make sense? To give yourself a good standard of life, you have to keep going. As well as that, another way I stay motivated to go on which I’ve talked about before maybe (not that I expect you to have read this) is my writing. I’m motivated sometimes to do things I have to if only because I need free time to think deeply about the things I want to think about. Also I love writing more than pretty much anything, even if most writers will look at what I’m doing and laugh or wonder why I’d dedicate so much time to some things in particular, because I love it. If I can make sure my rent is paid every month, that’s a promise I have a room to sit in every night where I can write whatever story I want! Another motivation is my ability to give bits of myself? It sounds ridiculous because I don’t genuinely believe I’m giving myself to people but to try and be a positive part of someone life is a good place to start if you feel purposeless. My relationships with my sisters are a tether for me and I’ve tried so hard and so much to make these relationships count, as well as with long distance friends, and recently ish I got back into contact with friends I couldn’t maintain relationships with when I was feeling down, and now my life feels very changed. I don’t live solely for myself, (though it’s okay if you do, because its hard and sometimes a lot of pressure to live for and around others) so that gives my life more purpose, and gives me more reason to do things I have to do. I also desperately enjoy this blog !!

I’m genuinely so sorry if this is all useless. I’ve been typing this answer since like 1:05 and it’s much later now, but it’s because it’s hard to describe to you the things that give motivation, because I know deep down how impossible it feels when you have none. I don’t expect you to read this and think aw jade you’ve solved it I’m fine now actually, I just hope that one thing in here can lend you an idea as to what to do next. If you’re struggling to go on, there are lots of options available to you in the UK such as the SHOUT text line for stress, depression, and eating disorders. They’re free to text and anonymous! I don’t think there’s one answer to giving yourself purpose, it is a very hard life and I don’t blame you for feeling incapable or bored or worried or anything you’re feeling, but I do for sure know you can do this, because I can do it, if that makes sense. Like I bet we’re extremely different people on account of uniqueness but also bet we have so many similarities!! And I certainly don’t mind guessing that you’re a loving, caring, person who deserves to feel more fulfilled. It’s my recommendation that you try to understand why you’re not feeling your best right now, that you talk to someone if you can, that you have some faith in yourself, and that you treat yourself with the same love and patience as you would any other person experiencing burnout! again I’m so so sorry if this is all rubbish. I’m forcing myself to stop now. So sorry if it doesn’t make sense or if half of this is completely unrelated to what you’re asking. I love you and I hope you feel better, genuinely truly ❤️❤️❤️❤️

#jade's asks #ily

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dozing-marshmallow · 7 months

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helloo!! the og nibling requester here (hehe i gave myself that nickname :] ) okay, i've kinda got two ideas!! nibling!reader getting comfort from chris (n had an argument with someone, you can pick who) or, gn!reader x chris having a snow day :] you can pick either! thank you for the amazing stories <33

AWW HELLO AGAIN MY LOVE!❤️ Welcome back to my blog, I hope I didn’t keep you waiting for long! Thank you so much for your well meaning words, you are such a beaut, but really, you should be thanking yourself for giving the amazing requests! As always, I hope you enjoy!💗(and feel free to request the other idea again if it’s something you want to see in the future!)

CHRIS MCLEAN X NIBLING! READER HEADCANONS (PART 7)

It’s another school break, and you’re back.

Back on your uncle’s couch, watching TV.

You thought you had imagined it, but keeping your attention longer on the window rewarded you with the reality of the consistent fall of the watery fluff.

You come closer and your heart jumps in delight.

It’s snowing!

Squealing, you rush from the living room to find your uncle, to inform him of nature’s miracle, to get him to go outside with you, to to to!

“Chris?” you run up to his bedroom door and knock on it rhythmically, singing,“Do you wanna build a snowman? Come on let’s go and play-“

The door opens. Oh! Guess you didn’t need to go through the entire song, even though you had prepared for it.

The occupant snickers, pointing finger guns down at you, ski goggles on,“Already ahead of ya!”

Because this was the first time camp Wawanakwa was getting snow, you and Chris had to improvise on snow gear.

Well, you had to. Chris already had his set of winter clothes. Fortunately, you had your coat, mittens and worn out Wellington boots laying around somewhere and you got to borrow Chris’ pair of earmuffs and his scarf.

Stepping outside, it was a completely different air. The freezing change of temperature nibbled your skin like a shrew on a worm and the hairs on your arms somehow were tensing up when you just stepped outside. You forgot how cold the planet can be.

“I didn’t know islands could get snow! It’s so much!” you yell, throwing your legs up to merry about.

“You learn something new everyday!”

“Look! The whole trampoline is covered in snow!” you point astonished at the bouncy garden toy of springs, now submerged under the husking snowfall.

You had to be careful where you walked, come to realise- the entire island as you knew it was masked by this misty paleness that only seemed to thicken as more of its leader piled next to your ankles.

Naturally, you didn’t think about the dangers of gleefully hopping into the smooth slopes so soon, until you see that you’re about to walk into a chunky physique of a tree.

You stop on time, and feel something moving above you. Something alive. You feed your curiosity, finding a large pair of indigo eyes and a pointy nose.

“Look, Chris look!” you call cheerfully for him, neck extended to the sky,“There’s an owl up there!”

There was! You got to hold one once. It was heavy, but kind! This owl was as keen as you about this sudden weather pattern, sitting on top of the high tree branch, nuzzled in its feathery neck, before tending to its nest, seeing another identical head and two peek from inside of the dry tree room,“Aw, it has babies! They’re so cute!” you see your uncle aside you, also observing,“Do you think they’ll be okay in the cold?”

“Sure they will. They’re adapted to survive weathers like these.” his answer was bluntly uninspiring, grazing accurately to his non-peculiar passion for animals despite him being surrounded by them everyday,“Now about that snowman...”

“Oh yes! Let’s goooo...” you rotate to find a vacant opening,“Down there! Where we’ll have plenty of snow!”

Chris had another idea, trailing behind your steps, boots consuming your smaller tracks,"How about we have a competition? Best snowman gets first dibs on the fireplace." he obviously knew what would happen to bet that.

“Aww...” you pout, the tip of your nose starting to tingle,"Why do we need to compete? You know you're gonna win, you have bigger hands!"

"Ohh?” he puts a finger to his chin, smirking,“Already admitting defeat? I'll gladly take the title of victory!"

Something about his unnecessarily fuelled pride abruptly changed your mind,“I won't let the size of your hands stop me from building the best snowman the world's ever seen!"

“Alrighty then!” he holds his arms out, wind must’ve changed the direction to glue that face on his face,“Bring it on, nibling!”

The cold air howls past your face. Your tongue catches a few drops of snow, heading off under competition stress to mark your own construction ground,“How is it on tv they’re able to roll the snowball so smoothly?”

“You’ve been on tv yourself, (Y/N).” your uncle replies in a raised tone, moulding some snow from the ground into a sphere, still standing in the same position,“You should be able to figure it out.”

You somehow found some stones under this blank layer of Earth to place on the snowman’s torso and practically identical lengths of twigs for arms. The only thing missing was its clothes, but with this snowfall, it’d be a death wish to even remove these earmuffs!

You look over to Chris’ side: though his snowman was vast, you can tell from his relaxed pace of motion that he actually couldn’t be bothered to make it look good.

“Pretty awesome snowman!” he congratulates you on yours by the unspoken end.

You’re very proud,“Yep! I did that!” It was so good you would have thought Chris made it!,“Too bad he decomposed early."

Confused, your uncle cocks his head to the side,"What do you mean?"

Unprompted, you tore a piece of the snowman’s shoulder and threw it at Chris, striking his chest,"Boom! Take that!"

He wipes the remaining frozen fragments off him,“Is that what we’re going to do now?” he briefly returns to his sloppy snowman and removed its head from the body of snow, darkly joking,“Remember that’s how your teddy looked like that one time?”

“Because of Heather!” you giggle, now able to fill your newer days with laughter about the tragedy you genially moved on from,“Ahh!”

Your uncle starts to chase you with both hands full of the clump of crystals. You liked running in the snow- every time you placed a foot ahead, it’d let out this really soothing crunch sound.

Whenever you think you’re far enough with time to spare, you’d hurry to grab a good handful of snow from the ground to throw at him, stride never getting slower.

I wish footprints didn’t exist!

Eventually, he makes an extra step for the chance and launches it, not thinking it would stay in the air for so long.

No amount of running could save you from the hurl of the large cannon ball- on impact, you land on your back into a lower plane of snow, where on a warmer day, you would’ve seen how high you fell from the mini hill.

Chris was worried when you don’t instantly recover to your feet, but smiles when he rushed to find you parting and closing your legs, raising and lowering your arms in the digging form of a snow angel, seeing the distribution of uneven crumbles of his snowman’s head.

The snowflakes resumes to sprinkle your face, gently pecking your youthful features with the cooling drops of white. It wasn’t so cold anymore,“Hehehe! Do one with me, uncle Chris!”

So he does, not surprising that his one was much larger, with his height and fur coat.

You jump up from the soggy ground and admire another work of art you both had shaken into the bitter sheet.

The nibling and uncle silhouettes in the snow had you remembering another must do in this foggy weather.

“Chriiiis, can we go back inside now and have hot chocolate?”

He groans in disbelief,“Seriously? Boooooooo.” he reluctantly dragged his legs across the snow, in the direction of his “cottage”. You can see it from the distance, the yellow beams illuminating the squares of glass, probably being the only reason why he knew how to get back,“What a perfect time to get ice cream.”

“Ah...” it felt great to be back inside. His house was soooo cosy. And this hot chocolate was just what you needed. You might need to dump your feet into a tub of hot water,“Uncle, do you think we can play some Christmas songs?”

“Why, because it’s snowing it means it’s the holidays?” right after he snorted, his mouth is covered by the back of his mug. Paradoxically, he was back in his indoor clothes before you, reminding you once again that your uncle really was unpredictable.

“The holidays wanted to come early! Which meaaans I’ll be getting extra time off school!” you clutch giggly to the circumference of your mug, hands burning. More time to stay, more time to play!

“But that means no holidays during December.” he smirks, twirling his steamy cocoa around, sinister to your let down.

“Aww...” you hated how realistic that sounded. School was so mean!,“Never mind...” there wouldn’t be enough time to open presents. You pitifully pinch a marshmallow from your cup and chomp on it.

“Hey, no need to be so down!” Chris’ charismatic voice rasps as he rubs your head,“Christmas is right around the corner.”

“True...” you add another swirl of whipped cream to your cup, covering the homely brown,“Will I get to be here then?”

“For sure! It’ll be the best Christmas yet!” he affirms with strength.

Hm hm (hm). Hm hm hm hm hm hm hm.

#chris mclean #chris mclean x reader #total drama chris mclean #tdi x reader #total drama island chris #total drama #tdi #td chris mclean x reader #request #td chris #uncle chris mclean #nibling reader #nibling #total drama chris #chris nibling reader

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