#I don’t doubt they’ll continue to be close friends

[theoreticslut]

「 jealousy, jealously 」

eddie munson x henderson!fem reader

summary: you were a part of hellfire long before your brother and his friends got to high school, yet they fit right into the club while you get pushed aside. 

requested: no

word count: 6.4k

warnings: light angst, jealousy, brief arguing/raised voices, lots of fluff, kissing, fake gagging, few curse words

a/n: i apparently can’t write short fics for eddie, but i don’t think anyone is complaining about it. plus, i think the fics are freaking adorable & i’m highkey kinda proud of them. so i hope you continue enjoying them, as i’ve got plenty of ideas for him with more coming daily. if you’ve got an idea you’d like done (for eddie or any other st character) feel free to send it my way & i’ll give it a go. also, i couldn’t think of a better title than this, but the actual fic has no purposeful inpsiration from the olivia rodrigo song. i hope you enjoy it regardless! Xx

Part 2 out now!

You groan as you see your brother and his friends make their way through the cafeteria towards you. Knowing it was their first day of high school, you had no doubt they’d try to sit with you. It’s not that you don’t want them to, but you’re terrified that they’ll embarrass you in front of your long-standing crush and dungeon master.

It had been a few months into your freshman year of high school when the small group of friends you’d found yourself in started ranting about how weird and creepy the Hellfire club - and their leader, Eddie Munson - was. You didn’t quite hold the same opinions, though, since you’d been playing the game for a few years by then. In fact, you had only recently given it up when the friend you played with moved towns.

It was during one of your free periods when their ranting became a bit annoying to you. You had started correcting and fact-checking them, forgetting that Eddie shared the study hall with you. You never even gave it a thought that he could hear the four of you talking until he stopped you at your locker after that period - the day, luckily, being over.

He wanted to know how you knew so much about the game which is when you admitted you had played. Of course that knowledge completely floored him. 

When he was able to pull himself back together, though, he offered for you to join them at lunch the following day to meet the group and see if you wanted to become their newest member. You agreed, and within the week found yourself a permanent part of hellfire with your own shirt and everything.

It’s been two and a half years since then and you were still a part of the group, happily devoting your Thursday evenings to play the game. Within these past couple years and all the Thursdays you’ve spent in his presence, though, you found yourself falling hard for Eddie.

It’s nearly impossible not to when he’s so charismatic and funny. Not to mention how kind, passionate, and beautiful he is. You’d swear he was a fucking angel, regardless of the image he tries to portray.

“Y/n! Can we sit here with you? Please?” You hear your brother almost beg, catching your attention as your heart starts to race.

You’ve never mentioned to the group that you have a younger brother, especially not a younger brother that also plays D&D. You knew they’d want to be introduced to him, and you fear that he'd slowly come to replace you in the group.

“Who’re these kids?” Eddie questions, hands clasped in front of his face as he looks between you and the three younger boys standing behind you.

“Uh, Dustin, here, is my brother.” You start, nodding towards him as he smiles.

“A-and these are his friends, Mike and Lucas.” 

“A young Henderson…hmm? Tell me, do you guys play?” Eddie asks the three boys, catching them off guard, their mouths opening and closing as they figure out how to answer.

“They do. They’ve been playing for a few years.” You answer for them, motioning for them to just sit down.

“Thank you.” Mike and Lucas mouth, having sat on the same side of the table as you with Dustin.

You sigh, smiling lightly as you nod to them. Of course you don’t want to upset Eddie, but you’re also not going to leave your brother and his friends to fend for themselves.

Wanting to move on, you take a bite of your lunch, hoping that Eddie leaves the topic of the boys joining you alone. Having known him for three years, though, you should know that he can’t.

“You’ve never mentioned having a brother, Henderson.” He comments, and you can practically feel his eyes on you as you stare at your food.

“The topic never really came up.” 

“Not even when I’ve mentioned wanting to find new members?” He lightly smirks, curious as to why you’d keep such a thing secret. 

Surely you realize how great having a brother that plays D&D is? Within the year most of you will be graduating, and he needs someone to pass the dungeon master title on to. Your younger brother and his friends just starting high school couldn’t be a better option.

“Figured you’d find him and his friends soon enough anyways.” you comment, still not looking up to the curly-haired adonis.

“Hmm, well they’ve saved me the work of searching them out by coming over here. Welcome to hellfire, boys.” 

“Wait, you’re just letting them join?” Gareth questions.

“Yeah. You’ve seen Henderson play. If they know her then they’ve got to be good.” Eddie smiles, making your cheeks flush.

“They’re good, but not on my account.” You mumble.

“Nonsense. Still can’t believe you wouldn’t tell us about them before now, though.” 

“How come you haven’t, y/n? I mean, you talk about them all the time.” Dustin asks, before taking a bite of his food. 

At his statement, the rest of the group seem to perk up, curious to know what you say about each of them. 

“I do not. I’ve only mentioned the club a few times.” You huff, feeling your cheeks heat up a bit more.

“Only a few times to mom and I, but I hear you on the phone with your friend talking about them every week.”

“First off, why’re you even listening to me on the phone? Secondly, the only reason I talk about the club is because I’m updating her on my life.” 

“Got a rather boring life then.” Dustin quips and you simply gawk at him, not believing him right now as a few surprised chuckles leave the rest of the boys.

“Shut up and eat, Dustin. No one asked for your input.” 

You watch him shrug before turning to Mike and Lucas while you stick to staring at your food, feeling the group's eyes on you. It’s bad enough you’re the only girl in the group, you didn’t need them to know you talk about them on a weekly basis.

Little do you realize that Eddie can’t help but find himself smiling at this new side of you. He’s been intrigued by you ever since he first heard you correcting your friends back in your freshman year. He couldn’t believe that such a beautiful girl would play the game he loved.

Of course, after watching you play and just spending time with you during lunch, he’s found himself crushing on you, even if you still remained a bit of a mystery to him. He couldn’t bring himself to tell you of his feelings, though. Not once in the three years he’s known you.

Hearing that you talk about the club, though, makes his heart race. You really enjoy their company so much that you’d talk about them to a friend? It’s insane to him, and yet it makes him feel giddy. He can’t help but wonder what you’ve said - about the club or about him.

~.~

“Lauren, I’m telling you! For as long as I’ve been a part of the club, my brother joins and suddenly that’s all they care about. They all like my brother and his friends better than me.” You sigh, turning onto your back as you stare at the ceiling.

“I highly doubt that, y/n. I’m sure it’s just that your brother and his friends are still new.”

“I wouldn’t be so sure, Laur. I mean, it’s not like I really bring anything to the group.”

“Y/n, you’re the only girl.”

“That doesn’t mean anything though.” You almost whine. 

You hate to admit it, but you’ve been feeling left out of the club ever since your brother and his friends joined a few months ago. You had the feeling that this would happen, even though you hoped it wouldn’t.

It’s not like you really bring anything to the group, though, now that you’ve introduced Dustin, Lucas, and Mike to the club. Your character isn’t super powerful or helpful or anything. You’re not the best roller. You’re just there...seemingly wasting space.

“Pretty sure it does. I mean, the way you’ve talked about…what’s his name, Eddie?”

“What about him?”

“The way you’ve talked about him, it sounds like he likes you.”

“No. No, he doesn’t. I’m sure of that. He barely talks to me.” You sigh, rolling over onto your stomach as you bury your head into the pillows.

“Y/n, hon, boys are terrible at talking to the girls they like!” Lauren laughs, and you know she’s shaking her head at you.

“Not Eddie. He usually can’t stop flirting, and yet he doesn’t flirt with me. I don’t even think he’s ever actually called me by my name, Laur. I’m just...Henderson to him.”

“Maybe you make him nervous.”

“Me? Make him nervous? Laur, you’ve lost your mind!” You scoff, knowing you could never make a guy nervous. 

Guys don’t even notice you, for crying out loud. How can you make them nervous?

“I don’t make guys nervous. Guys don’t even notice me, Laur. I’m not you.”

“Okay, now you’re just being down on yourself and I’m not going to have that. If this Eddie guy can’t see how fucking amazing you are, then he just doesn’t deserve you. Alright?”

“Not alright. I want him to like me. Like, a lot.” You pout.

“I’m telling you he does. If I’m wrong then I’ll drive myself down there and let you have free go at me. How’s that?”

“You know I’d never do that to you, but I’m telling you that you’re wrong.”

“Sure, I like him, but I know it’s never going to happen.” You sigh, twirling the cord as you stare at your bedspread, still laying on your stomach.

“What’s never going to happen?” You hear Dustin ask, making you jump and drop the phone.

“Dustin, get out of my room!”

“But it’s time to go! We’re going to be late if we don’t leave, y/n, and I don’t want to upset Eddie by being late.” He rambles, and all you can do is roll your eyes.

“Fine. Go get in the car. I’ll be right down.”

“Don’t forget that we’re picking up Mike and Lucas. And don’t forget your folder!”

“I won’t. Now go.” You groan, rolling back onto your stomach and grabbing the phone.

“I’m sorry, Laur. I’ve got to go.” 

“Time to go see your man, huh?” She teases and you roll your eyes, attempting to fight back a blush.

“He’s not my man. Never will be. I’ll call you later, though, okay?” 

“You better! Love you.”

With a ‘love you’ of your own you hang up the phone and roll off of your bed. Grabbing your backpack and a sweater, you slip your shoes on before grabbing your keys and leaving the room.

You really kind of hope tonight’s game goes by quickly, not wanting to be in Eddie’s presence longer than necessary.

~.~

Eddie can’t help but frown as he watches you tonight. He’s been noticing how you’ve been seeming more and more down, almost seeming to pull into yourself and away from the group this past month.

You’ve been quiet lately, which isn’t terribly out of character for you, but it seems different than normal. You don’t quite have that same brightness to you that Eddie’s come to look forward to each day.

“Henderson, is everything alright?”

At his voice you’re pulled from your thoughts, turning to look at the beautiful, curly-haired man that makes your heart race and palms sweat.

“Mhm. Fine.” You hum, nodding and sending a small smile in his direction.

“You’re sure?”

“Mhm.”

As you hum, you turn your attention back to your clasped hands on the table as you zone back out to Dustin and the rest of the group chattering around you.

“Little Henderson, is something up with your sister?” you hear Eddie question as he turns his attention to your brother. 

“Unbelievable.” You huff, shaking your head and crossing your arms as you slump back in your chair.

“Excuse me?” 

“Nothing. Never mind.” You mumble, staring at the table in front of you as you chew on the inside of your cheek.

All you did was zone out for a moment. You don’t understand why he’d have to ask Dustin what’s wrong when that’s all you did. It’s not like he’s ever actually taken notice of your emotions before to know that something is wrong.

“I think she’s upset about a guy.” Dustin speaks up after a moment and you can’t help but scowl at him, brows furrowed in shocked anger.

“A guy?” Eddie questions, almost seeming surprised.

“Yeah.” 

“It’s not about a guy, Dustin. Maybe try keeping your head out of my business.” You retort, jaw tensing in anger.

“But you were saying something about liking someone and how it’s not going to happen.”

“And I told you to stop listening in on me when I’m on the phone.” 

“Then what’s wrong?” Dustin questions, seeming like he genuinely wants to know which irritates you slightly. Why does he have to be so caring when you’re trying to be angry with him?

“Doesn’t matter.” you state, wanting the conversation to be over.

“Yes, it does.”

“If I wanted to tell you, Dustin, I would. Just leave it.” 

“G-guys, can we…can we get playing again?” You hear Mike stutter out and you let out a deep breath.

“Yeah. Sorry for getting off topic. Let’s play.”

“Are you going to be alright to play?” Eddie questions, looking you over, seemingly studying your body language.

He’s never seen you upset before, and he can’t help but wonder what’s going on. It’s not like you to be angry and short with others. Not when he’s always seen you as the happy, upbeat one of the group. 

Could it be a guy like Dustin suggested? Or is it just that you’re not feeling well? Either way he can’t help but want to know.

“I’ll be fine. Let’s just get this going again.” you answer, not bothering to look at anyone but rather as the table and your hands. 

“Henderson-“ Eddie starts, but you quickly cut him off, taking him by surprise at the sheer frustration coming from you.

“Do you not want me playing right now? I said I’ll be fine. Believe me, will you?” 

“Alright. Where were we?”

You let out a breath as you all slowly get back to the game, although you can feel the tenseness of the air still lingering. Attempting to ignore it, you force yourself to focus on what Eddie and everyone else is saying, hoping to god the campaign isn’t much longer.

~.~

Taking your seat at the lunch table, you feel Gareth and Jeff’s eyes on you. It’s like they’re not sure how to talk to you, almost afraid that you’re still as touchy as you were last night during the game.

“I’m not going to bite your heads off, you know.” You comment, not bothering to look up at them as you shove a forkful of food into your mouth.

“You’re sure?” Gareth questions, eyes wider than normal as he still seems cautious.

“Mhm. I just wasn’t feeling great last night.”

“Okay. You’ve just…never been like this.” He states and you know he’s not wrong. Ever since you first joined the club you’ve been quiet and almost demure, not wanting to create any issues. 

You shrug, acknowledging his statement, but leave it unanswered. There’s not really anything to say to that. Not when the entire reason for your irritation is kind of embarrassing and childish.

The two of them don’t seem to mind though, going back to talking amongst themselves as you eat in silence, waiting for everyone else to join the table.

It’s not like anything really changes once everyone is there. They all chat amongst themselves while you keep to yourself, only giving short replies when talked to. You simply eat in silence as you let yourself fall into your thoughts, not wanting to make the atmosphere tense like you had last night.

No one seems to mind, though. At least you don’t think they do. Not until Eddie slides into the empty desk next to yours in your shared study hall at the end of the day.

“Hey, Henderson.” He greets, voice lowered so as to not get yelled at by the teacher or to potentially get on your bad side.

“Hey.” 

“What’s…what’s going on lately?”

“What do y’mean?”

“You’ve been quieter than usual. Not as happy either.”

“Don’t know what you’re talking about Eddie.” You mumble, not wanting to share what’s been going on.

“No? See, I think you know exactly what I’m talking about. Something’s bothering you.” 

“So what if there is? I’m not telling you unless I want to.” 

At your reply, Eddie simply sighs, and you can’t help but feel a little rude. It’s not like he’s done anything, it’s just your stupid thoughts and feelings getting in the way.

“Alright then. I’m not going to push for an answer. I just...I need to know that whatever it is won’t be interfering with the campaign.” 

“It won’t be. Not from here on out.”

“Here on out?”

“I’m quitting the club. Been thinking about it for a while now.” You admit, watching his face fall at your words.

“Henderson-“

“It’s y/n, Eddie.“

As the words leave your lips, the bell rings to signal that the day is finally over. Without hesitating a second, you’re up from your seat and walking away, leaving Eddie confused and scrambling to catch up to you.

“Y/n?” He calls, chasing you from the classroom and towards the doors, not caring that he needed to stop at his locker.

You see Dustin, Lucas, and Mike waiting by the trash can at the edge of the parking lot, and you sigh. You really can’t wait to get home.

“Y/n?! What’s brought this on? Why do you wanna leave the club?” Eddie calls as he continues to follow you towards the parking lot.

“You’re leaving hellfire?” Dustin questions, him and the other two boys having heard Eddie.

“Just get in the car, Dustin.”

“But you’re leaving hellfire?! You can’t just do that!” 

“Exactly! Why’re you trying to leave?” Eddie questions, panting lightly as he finally catches up to you at your car.

“I’m not trying to leave, Eddie. I am leaving. I don’t want to be a part of it anymore. Sorry.”

“No. You can’t just leave. We haven’t finished the campaign yet.”

“You’ll figure out how to continue it without me, I’m sure.”

Of course he’d just be upset about the game getting messed up and not about you actually leaving. Why would he care when he’s still got Little Henderson there? 

“I’ll return my shirt next week.” You state, moving to get into the car.

“Th-that’s not necessary. Hold onto the shirt. Keep it for memory’s sake, I mean.”

“If that’s what you want.” 

Eddie nods, watching you, seeming as if he wants to say something else but he can’t bring himself to.

“Is that everything?” You question, wanting nothing more than to leave.

“Yeah...Yeah, I guess. I’ll see you around?” 

“Yeah. See you around. Come on now, Dustin.”

“You two need rides?” You question Mike and Lucas, almost seeming to ignore Eddie as you get in the car. They shake their heads and you nod, closing your door as you wait for Dustin to do the same.

Soon as he does, you’re putting the car in reverse and backing out as you had already started it. You really didn’t want to be there any longer than you already had been.

As you pull out of the parking lot, though, you can feel Dustin wanting to ask questions, but he seems scared to anger you, so he stays quiet. His questions simply swirling around his head, instead.

~.~

“Wait, you did what now?!” Lauren questions, almost screaming into the receiver.

“I quit the club. I couldn’t keep pretending everything was fine when it wasn’t.”

“But you enjoyed it.”

“I enjoyed it when I hadn’t been shoved to the background. I enjoyed it when I actually felt like a part of the club.” 

“So talk to them? You don’t just quit something because it stopped being fun.”

“I think that’s precisely what you do when a club stops being fun, Laur. Besides, it’s not like they miss me.” You huff, pulling your feet towards your body as you lay on your stomach, softly kicking them in the air.

It’s been just about a month since you quit the club, and while it saddens you a little, you’ve also felt the tiniest bit of relief. You don’t have to try so hard to keep your crush on Eddie hidden anymore. You don’t have to spend every lunch period listening to the guys talk about whatever it is they do while you sit to the side. You don’t have to feel like the outcast in the group of outcasts. 

Sure you miss playing the game, but it’s not the end of the world. You’ve found other things to keep yourself preoccupied. Mostly just listening to music and doing your homework, but you’ve found yourself picking up art as a hobby as the days dragged on, slowly starting to fill and old sketchbook you’ve had lying around.

~.~

“It’s still so weird that y/n isn’t here.” Gareth comments as the boys watch you sit at a different table once again. They don’t know why, but they keep hoping this has just been some kind of nightmare and that any day you’ll actually sit back down with them. It just doesn’t make sense why you’d leave them all so abruptly. 

“Yeah. It is.” Jeff agrees, sighing as they see a smile form on your face with a laugh falling out right after. It’s been way too long since any of them have seen you like this, and it kind of hurts.

“She still wears her shirt a lot.” Dustin informs, looking at the older boys - Eddie included - as they watch you.

“She does?” Eddie questions, the bit of knowledge somehow lifting him up a little.

He hated hearing you say you were quitting, and he hated it even more when Monday came around the week after and you didn’t sit with them. Nearly three years you had sat by his side and suddenly you weren’t there anymore. It felt beyond wrong, but he didn’t know what to do to fix it, if there even was anything that he could do.

“Yeah. She seems to wear it all the time now. I’m honestly not sure when the last time was that she didn’t wear it.”

Eddie nods, smiling lightly at the thought. He can’t help but wonder if there’s anything different he could have done to keep you from leaving. Was it something he had said? Or done? Was it just him?

“She’s been acting weird since she left. I heard her on the phone the other day-“

“You really should stop that, Dustin.” Eddie pipes up, but the younger boy doesn’t seem to hear.

“She said something about how she couldn’t keep pretending everything was fine after mentioning to her friend that she quit.”

“What?”

“Yeah, I don’t know. I’ve never known her to pretend about anything. I don’t know what she was talking about.”

“Because then she said something about enjoying the club when she felt like a part of it? She’s always been a part of it though.” Dustin continues, frowning as he eats his food.

He may not understand what you were talking about, but Eddie has a sinking feeling that he does. He really hopes he’s wrong though. 

He doesn’t want to admit that he was giving your brother and his friends more attention than he’s ever really gave you. It’s not that they’re better than you in any way, honestly. It’s just that they’re boys. 

He’s always hesitated in giving you attention during meetings or at lunch, because he didn’t want anyone to catch onto the crush he has on you. He was afraid that if Gareth or Jeff knew he liked you, that it’d make the atmosphere awkward. 

Even by keeping you at a distance, though, the two guys picked up on Eddie’s crush. It’s not in his character to be quiet or reserved in the slightest, so when they noticed how he constrained himself in conversation with you, they knew something was up.

Still, Eddie could never allow himself to act the same way with you like he does with Gareth and Jeff, and now your brother and his friends. He wanted you to like him, so he kept himself from being sarcastic and outspoken with you. Hearing Dustin talk though, Eddie has the suspicion that his plan may have backfired.

“Your sister still picks you up from the meetings, doesn’t she?” Eddie questions, already planning out what he wants to say to you when he can get you aside for a moment.

“No. Nancy’s been dropping me off or I’ve just been riding my bike.” 

“I’ll be driving you home tonight then.” 

“O-okay?!”

Eddie chuckles lightly at Dustin’s excitement, but he never takes his eyes off of you across the cafeteria. He needs to talk to you, and he’s hoping that tonight he can do just that.

~.~

“You know it ain’t easy, running out of thrills. You know it ain’t easy when you don’t know what you want.” 

You hum, laying on your bed as you listen to the drums, guitar, and vocals of Europe fill your room.

“What do you want?” You question, mirroring the song, your foot tapping against your bedspread as you close your eyes.

“Woah-oh-oh, you want to rock now, rock the night, ‘til early in the morning light. Rock now, rock the night.”

“Woah-oh, woah-oh, yeah!” You sing, smiling lightly. 

It’s been awhile since you’ve been able to just relax and enjoy listening to your music without worrying about homework or being late to hellfire. One of the plus sides of quitting the club - you finally get time just for yourself.

Hearing a knock on your door, you hum loud enough to acknowledge whoever is at the door.

“y/n? You’ve got a visitor.” Dustin calls, gently opening your door.

“Who?” You question, sitting up on your bed, nodding as Eddie comes into view behind Dustin.

“Oh…hi.”

“Hi. I-is it alright if I come in?” He questions, pausing in your doorway.

“Yeah, I guess so.” 

As he makes his way inside, you situate yourself in your bed so you’re comfortably sitting up.

“Do you…” 

At Eddie’s voice, you look up to see him questioning you about your door, going to close it before swinging it open.

“You can close it if you want. I don’t care.” 

He nods, softly shoving the door to close it, not quite giving it enough force to close all the way so there’s a little crack left open.

“So what’re you doing here?” You question him, watching him as he looks around, seeming a bit out of place with your soft white walls and contradicting decor.

While he may fit into the plethora of rock band posters covering your walls and the many records and cassettes you’ve got laying around, he doesn’t fit in with the florals and stuffed animals you’ve got elsewhere in your room.

“I, uh, I was hoping we could talk.”

“About what?”

You can’t help but chuckle as he spots the bralette hanging out of your dresser, you having been too lazy to tuck it back in earlier, and seems to pale in horror. For seeming so confident and cocky, he sure doesn’t look it being in a girl’s room.

“You can sit, you know.” You offer, motioning to the chair you’ve got in the corner of your room.

“Yeah, okay.” He mumbles, taking a few steps over towards the chair before sitting on the edge of the seat.

You watch as he takes in your room, fidgeting with his hands and rings as he does so. If you didn’t know better, you’d say he was nervous to be here.

“What did you want to talk about?”

“Uh, well, w-we really miss you being in the club. G-gareth, Jeff, and I. I mean, s-so do the younger ones, but…”

“But you three miss me more?” You question, eyebrow cocking in disbelief.

“Well, yeah…yeah.”

“Okay.” You deadpan, not sure what he wants in reply to that. It’s nice to hear that they miss you, but it doesn’t really change anything.

A brief moment passes where you watch Eddie, waiting for him to say something else. Taking in his mannerisms and body language, you can’t remember a time when Eddie’s ever looked so nervous and unsure of himself.

“D-dustin was saying you felt left out? Of the club?” Eddie clarifies, drawing up just enough courage to look at you.

“He was listening to me on the phone again, wasn’t he?” 

“Y-yeah. I tried telling him to stop, but I don’t think he heard me.” he sighs, chuckling lightly in nerves as you shake your head.

“I don’t think he’ll ever stop, if I’m honest. He’ll be traumatized one day or another I’m sure.” You laugh, shaking your head at the thought as you smile.

“It’s true though? You…you felt left out?”

“Yeah. It’s dumb, I know, but you guys took so easily to Dustin, Lucas, and Mike.”

“I get it, they’re great kids, and they play D&D…but it’s like they didn’t even have to try to fit into the group.” You sigh, knowing it’s about time you share at least part of the problem.

“No. No, it’s not dumb. I’m sorry we made you - I made you - feel that way.” Eddie sighs, catching your line of sight in his, wanting you to realize how sincere he’s being.

He never wanted to make you feel left out, it’s just his stupid feelings that got in the way.

“It’s fine. It doesn’t matter anymore, anyways.” 

“It does matter, though. We’d - I’d - really like you to join the group again. It’s not the same without you there, y/n.”

“I’m sorry. I just, I really don’t think joining again would be good, though.” You admit, knowing that if you joined again you’d still just be upset that nothing will ever come from your crush on him.

“How come? I-is there something else that’s been bothering you about the club? I want you to feel welcome.”

“No. No, It’s nothing about the club, Eddie. There’s just a lot of things going on personally that’d make it hard.”

“That guy issue?”

“What?”

“Is it anything to do with that guy issue Dustin mentioned?” Eddie questions, and you can’t help but gawk at him.

“Does he not like you playing or something?”

“What? No.” you answer, shaking your head incredulously, wondering how Eddie got it into his head that you’d ever be wanted by someone. Has he never actually watched how other guys interact with you?

“Then what is it? Why won’t you come back to the club?”

“It doesn’t matter. I just...can’t. It’s better if I let you guys enjoy it yourselves.”

“It’s not better, though. We all want you back, y/n.”

“I’m sorry.” You sigh, not knowing what else you can say. 

A moment passes where neither of you say anything and you start to think that maybe you’re done talking. Before you can say anything of the sort though, Eddie’s asking a question.

“Tell me, is there anything I can do? Anything that would make you want to come back?”

“No…no, there’s nothing you could do, eddie, I promise y-“

“There must be.” He argues, wanting nothing more than to find something he can do to get you to come back. 

He misses you more than he thought possible, and he just needs there to be something - anything - he can do.

“There’s not, though.”

“How come?”

“What?”

“How come there’s nothing I can do? Are you just that dead set on not coming back? Even though we all miss you?”

“If I could, trust me that I would join the group again. I just, I can’t right now, Eddie. I’m sor-“

“Why can’t you?”

“Because…because of you.” You sigh, fed up with him pushing for an answer.

“Me?”

“You, Eddie. I can’t come back because of you. Because if I did then I’d just get all upset again because my heart is dumb and doesn’t know how to listen.” 

“What do you mean?”

You sigh, taking a deep breath as you look at him. You can’t seriously be getting ready to tell him this, but you are. You don’t see any other option right now.

“I like you, Eddie.” You sigh, fidgeting with your fingers.

“I like you, but you don’t like me. I mean, it’s obvious between you never talking to me or looking at me and how you’ve always called me Hender-“

You gasp, moaning lightly as you get cut off by a pair of lips on yours. Eddie was kissing you to shut you up.

At the realization you can’t help but panic, not understanding why he’d do this when he doesn’t like you. 

“Eddie!” 

“Fuck! I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I just, you were rambling and saying I didn’t like you but I do! I do. I like y-“

It’s his turn to gasp and groan into the kiss as you pull him to your lips, one hand tightly grasped in the front of his shirt while the other drapes around his shoulders, holding him close to you.

As he realizes what’s happening, he relaxes into the kiss, his one hand coming up to caress your cheek as the other holds himself up on the bed.

It’s not until you’re both out of breath and gasping for air do you actually pull away from each other, your hand relaxing against his chest as he lowers his from your cheek.

“Woah.” He sighs, trying to catch his breath as he chuckles lightly, studying your face.

“Yeah.” You murmur, ghosting your fingers over your lips as if trying to remember if that actually just happened.

“Uhm, so I like you. If-if that wasn’t obvious.” He stutters and you chuckle, smiling at the curly-haired dork.

“I like you too.”

“I’m sorry I pushed you away. Made you feel left out when I was just too nervous to admit I liked you.”

“I’m sorry I got all moody and quit the club because I was jealous of my brother instead of just telling you how I felt.”

“So…does this mean you’ll come back?” He asks, hopeful, as he kneels in front of you.

“You’ll stop treating me differently?”

“Mhm. Trust me when I say there’ll be no pushing you away after that.” 

“Mm. Don’t be treating me specially either just because we kissed.” you lightly chuckle, cocking a brow as you chew on your lip to hold back the smile wanting to light up your face.

“Can I treat you differently if I ask you to be my girlfriend?” he questions, a wide, goofy smile filling his face as he looks at you.

A smile grows on your face at his sheer happiness, drawing a light chuckle from you as you reply to his question.

“Not during game play. We don’t wanna be unfair to the guys, do we?”

“Mm, you’re right. If I promise to not treat you specially during gameplay then will you be my girlfriend?” he asks, really wanting to hear you say yes. He’s only liked you for nearly three years, frequently imagining you as his girlfriend the entire time.

“I would really love for you to be my girlfriend, and I your boyfriend. It just. It sounds really nice.” 

“You ramble a lot. You know that?” You giggle, tucking some hair behind his ear as a blush dusts over his cheeks.

“Is that a good thing?”

“Sometimes.” You smile, biting your lip to keep from kissing him again.

“So…?”

“If you promise not to treat me specially during the game, then I’d love to be your girlfriend, Eddie.”

“Yeah?” He questions, as if he doesn’t believe that you’d agree.

“Yeah.”

With the word out of your mouth, his lips find yours again, pulling a chuckle from your body as he slowly lowers himself on top of you, pinning you against your mattress as he kisses you, one hand cupping your cheek as the other rests on your waist.

“Did you-ew!” You hear Dustin call from your doorway, fake gagging as he sees Eddie on top of you, effectively startling the man back into kneeling at the end of your bed.

“Did we what, dustin?” You ask, leaning around Eddie’s body to look at your brother still standing at your doorway, one hand plastered over his eyes.

“I wanted to see if you two had figured things out, but it seems like you did.”

“Yeah, we did, little henderson. Your sister is coming back to the club.” Eddie shares, smiling at you as he situates himself on the bed beside you, Dustin uncovering his eyes in excitement at the exact same time.

“Can you please get off of my sister?” he begs, shielding his eyes again as eddie places a soft kiss to your lips in his own happiness of you coming back to the club.

“But I like being close to my girlfriend.”

“Girlfriend?! You’re dating my sister?!” Dustin exclaims, a look of pure shock and disgust on his face.

“Is there a problem with it, Dustin?” You question, watching your brother almost seeming to pout.

“I guess not. Just…don’t be gross when I’m around. Please?”

“We’ll try not to be.” Eddie states, smiling at you as Dustin nods, giving a small okay before leaving the two of you alone.

As the door closes, Eddie’s looking back at you, both of you chuckling.

“Guess you were right in saying he’d be traumatized one day.” He chuckles, leaning down to give you another kiss, never realizing just how amazing it’d feel to have your lips on his.

You can’t help but smile into it, enjoying the feel of his body on yours. You’ve only been imaging this moment for nearly four years. You’ve got to say that nothing you imagined could ever live up to the reality, though. Kissing Eddie is like a little slice of heaven, you swear.

It certainly took you long enough to get here, but now that you’re here, you don’t ever want to go back.

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[moonlightspencie]

tenderly, tragically

Description: Silly, lifelong best-friendship leads to a lot of meaningless teasing. Though, sometimes teasing comes from a place of truth. It’s just that sometimes, those getting teased are the last to know why.

Pairing: Best friend!James Potter x Reader

Warnings: fluff, some angst, smut 18+ (p in v, praise kink, whiny james, size kink, first time for both), drinking, its really idiots to lovers

Word Count: 7.8k (just fluff): 9.4k (smut)

A/N: smut is at the end, and there’s a warning before it starts since it’s kind of like an alternate ending/extra bit. if you JUST want fluff, it ends at a good point for that before the smut starts :) ALSO: as with all of my marauders fics, characters are aged up (19-20)

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“Jamie,” I squeal a laugh, chasing after him.

He laughs, continuing to out-run me. The bastard.

“Not my fault you’re slow,” he calls back. “Catch up, love, or you’ll get caught.”

I run harder, jumping on his back when I get close enough. We both knew he’d slowed down to let me get closer, but neither of us bothered to mention it. He laughed, holding onto my legs as they wrapped around his waist, slowing until he was walking.

“You’re going to get us caught, you know that?”

I snort a laugh. “Please. There wasn’t even anybody there.”

He rolls his eyes playfully, finally dropping me from his back, and instead slinging an arm around my shoulders.

“They could have, though.”

“But they didn’t,” I say pointedly. “Besides, Remus, Peter, and Sirius are still actually in the Slytherin dorms. Lousy look-outs we are because of you.”

He chuckles, walking us towards the stairs.

“They’ll be fine,” he shrugs with a cocky smirk. “Besides, I doubt even most of the Slytherins would object to a little prank on Snivellus.”

I hum, nodding a little. “I guess. Still. You’re a bad friend.”

“You ran too,” he accused, his brow furrowing. “Don’t go and pin all this on me.”

“You told me to run!”

“You didn’t have to listen!”

I scoff, shaking my head. He gives me an irritated look, but pulls me a little closer under his arm. We get into the common room, and without even asking, he starts ushering me to their dorm room.

“Why?” I ask, knowing he knows what I’m asking.

“Sue me for wanting to spend some time with my life-long friend,” he says, quirking a brow.

I push him away from me, but he doesn’t really let me get far. He opens his door, pushing me in first. I immediately flop onto his bed face-first.

“Not complaining now, are you?” he asks, laying next to me.

“Not my fault your bed is so comfy,” I say, my voice muffled by the mattress.

I feel the mattress dip, and look up to see him also turned on his stomach, right next to me.

“If you really wanted to get me alone this bad you could’ve asked,” I say with a wink.

He rolls his eyes, but a smile gives him away.

“Please. I know you’re secretly hoping for it, but we both know that’s never going to happen.”

“Me?” I laugh. “As if. What would I do with a quidditch player?”

He scoffs, an offended look on his face.

“I’ll have you know that I am very desirable, and half of that has to do with the fact I’m the seeker, thank you.”

I roll my eyes. “Uh huh. And what’s the other half?”

“You seen this face?” he asks, a cocky smirk on his lips.

“Unfortunately I have.”

“You’re mean,” he says, a laugh breaking up his attempt to be offended.

He pushes me a bit, but I hardly budge. I laugh at his attempt, but apparently that was the wrong thing to do. He perks up, trying harder to fully push me off the bed, now.

“Hey!” I say in protest, fighting back against him.

He laughs, both of us practically fighting as he keeps trying to push me off. I see an opportunity a moment later and take it: I grab onto one of his arms with both of mine.

“Ha!” I say loudly. “Can’t push me off now unless you also fall off.”

He pauses, then an evil smirk comes onto his face. My face drops as I realize what he’s about to do. He scoots over, dropping both of us onto the ground. I squeal as we fall, and I end up taking the brunt of the fall as he lands on top of me.

“You should never threaten me with a good time. You know I can’t resist,” he says, not bothering to alleviate the pressure of his body pinning me down.

I groan. “You suck. I didn’t think you’d actually push both of us off just to get me.”

“Then you don’t know me very well,” he replies with a quirked brow.

“Please. I know you better than anyone and you know it.”

He opens his mouth to snark back at me, but the door opens before he gets a chance.

“You two are the worst,” Sirius says, clearly out of breath. Then, he scoffs as more footsteps follow behind him. “And look at this! They ran off on us to… Canoodle on the floor.”

I furrow my brow, pulling a face as I try to see him around James.

“Canoodle?” I repeat in disgust.

James finally starts getting off of me, kneeling on the ground next to me as I start pulling myself up. Remus and Peter give us a look.

“We’re not… canoodling, and you can blame Prongs for us ditching. He’s the one who took off running and told me I had to, too.”

Remus quirks a brow at that as Sirius goes to sit on his bed.

“You didn’t have to listen to him,” Peter pipes up.

“That’s what I told her,” James says, giving me a self-satisfied look.

I make a sour face at him, pushing his arm a little. He pushes me back, and I straighten up. Though, Remus must notice that look on me.

“Don’t you two start up again,” he says, pointedly looking between us. “If I have to watch you two flirt any more I might throw up.”

“We’re not flirting,” James grumbles. “She’s just fun to mess with.”

“Mm. And you’re just easy to win a fight against,” I add.

He looks at me quickly. “You didn’t win the last one.”

“Because you pushed us both off the bed!” I exclaim.

“Oh, shut it, you two,” Sirius says, his arm draped over his face. “We’ve been back for three days and you’re already acting up.”

I snort a laugh at Sirius’s annoyance, climbing back onto James’s bed. I sigh with my face in the pillows, feeling him climb over me to get to the other side a second later.

“You got us in trouble,” he whispers.

“Your fault, not mine,” I reply.

“You’re the one who insulted my perfect face.”

“You’re the one who pushed me first,” I argue back.

“Oi!” Sirius calls out again, leaving us both laughing.

Our first few weeks of school go off without a hitch. The boys continue pulling their little pranks, occasionally dragging me along with them. I settle into my space this year, glad to still have Lily, Marlene, and Dorcas as my roommates. We always tended to get along quite well.

I start reading a new book one night, absolutely enraptured with the story, probably even more so considering it’s helping me to avoid the homework that I really should be doing. I get though the first couple chapters before I notice Lily staring at me.

“What is it, Lils?”

“Can I tell you something?” Lily asks suddenly.

She looks around the room, seemingly to make sure the other girls are really gone for whatever she’s about to say.

I look at her over my book. “Sure.”

“Promise not to tell anyone?”

I nod. “Promise.”

She sighs, sitting up a little straighter. “I think I have a thing for someone… Well, for James.”

My eyes widen. “Really? You wanted nothing to do with him a little while ago.”

“I know. I just… I don’t know. Maybe I’m just bored or something, but I’ve been thinking about telling him.”

I nod. “Yeah. You should.”

“Really?” she asks, surprised.

“Why not?”

She smiles to herself. “Yeah. Why not? Do you think he’ll say it back.”

I shrug. “I don’t know. Maybe? He did have a crush on you before.”

She hums to herself. I laugh a little, shaking my head.

“I think I’ll do it tomorrow. Better to do it sooner than later, yeah?”

“Yeah, I guess so,” I shrug noncommittally. I really just wanted to get back to my book.

“You don’t even care,” she groans after a moment.

“This is a really good book, Lils,” I laugh.

“Fine. I’ll stop bothering you.”

“Thanks,” I smirk to myself.

She scoffs again, though I know she isn’t really offended. I wish her good luck as we head off to our classes that day, knowing she was planning on telling James sometime in the morning.

I end up finding him later, though I try not to press for answers the second I find him. We sit on the grass in the late afternoon, watching some first years play a little quidditch match for fun. It’s uncharacteristically warm outside, and the sun shines down on us. After half an hour of watching the kids play, I glance at James.

“I wanna show you something,” I say suddenly, standing.

James looks up at me in confusion. “I’d prefer not to move.”

I roll my eyes, crossing my arms over my chest.

“It’s a nice day. Sunny and no clouds. Please, just follow me?” I ask, almost whining. “Promise you’ll like it.”

He leans back on his hands. “How do you know?”

“Because I found a secret place in the woods, and you’ll be the first person besides me to see it,” I offer.

He quirks a brow. “Yeah?”

“Yeah. Now get up.”

He grumbles to himself as he gets up, following me as we walk towards the woods. I start leading him through the trees towards the destination I had in mind.

“What were you even doing in here? It’s dangerous,” he says quietly.

“I was fine. Just had a long day and wanted to explore. It was in the daytime anyway,” I say matter-of-factly.

He hums to himself, clearly dissatisfied that I went out here by myself. But as I finally lead him to our destination, his annoyance wears off.

“Whoa,” he says, his eyes a little wide.

I smile. “See? Told you it would be worth your while.”

He looks on at the small clearing. There’s a little pond with clear water, the space in the trees allowing some sunlight to reflect on the water. It looks peaceful at least, and nearly-heavenly at best. I look at him expectantly.

“How’d you find this?” he asks, squatting by the water. He dips his hand it. “Whoa. It’s warm.”

I nod, still standing. “I found it when I was exploring, like I said. A few weeks ago. I charmed the water to stay warm, so I’ve been out here two or three times to swim. Thought I’d show you before it gets too cold.”

He smiles, standing up. “You want to go swimming? You didn’t bring any—”

His eyes widen as he finally looks at me. At this point, I’ve already started taking off my robes and my shirt.

“What?” I ask, brows furrowed. “You act like you’ve never been around me getting dressed. We’ve been friends since we were like six years old. Now, hurry up. Faster you get undressed, the faster we get to swim.”

He rolls his eyes at me, begrudgingly taking off his clothes, even though part of him still looks excited that I’d found such a nice little place.

I start wading in once I’m down to my underwear, the water feeling nice and warm in contrast to the slightly-cool air. I hear him come in after me in a moment, and turn to watch him.

“Nice, isn’t it?”

“Can’t believe you were hiding this from me,” he says, hiding a smirk.

“Oh, please,” I reply, floating on my back in the water. “You’re lucky I showed you at all. Nobody else knows about this. You should feel honored.”

I hear him hum and splash around a little, though my eyes are closed. I bask in the warmth of the sunlight on my face.

“Did Lils talk to you today?” I ask after a few minutes of silence.

“Yeah.”

I upright myself, looking at him as he aimlessly walks around in the water.

“And?”

He glances at me, giving a shrug. “I don’t know.”

“You don’t know?” I press, furrowing my brow. “What’s that supposed to mean? What did you guys talk about?”

“I have a feeling you already know,” he snorts a laugh.

I roll my eyes, wading closer to him. “So she told you?”

“Yep.”

“Well, what happened? What did you say?”

He sighs dramatically. “Does it matter?”

I splash him a little. “I’m gonna hear about it no matter what. She’s my roommate. Just wanted to know from you before I see Lily later.”

“Told her I wasn’t interested,” he says quietly, splashing me back a little.

I pause. “Why? You always had a massive crush on her.”

“Not in like a year,” he says.

“So you just rejected her?”

“I didn’t reject her,” he furrows his brows, looking away from me. “She told me she liked me, and I just told her I wasn’t into her like that. She didn’t ask me a question, so it wasn’t a rejection. Just being honest.”

I groan. “Jamie, she’s going to kill me. I’m the one who encouraged her to tell you.”

His eyes widened. “Why the hell would you do that?”

“I thought you liked her!”

He pauses for a moment, then splashes me again, this time fully soaking me. I scoff a laugh, in shock as the water hits me. I glare at him, then splash him back just as hard. He starts going on the attack, practically throwing the water at me repeatedly.

“You absolute tosser,” I say, continuing to splash back, though I can’t help but laugh.

I start backing up as we both continue, now laughing and barely able to see with how rapid-fire we’re going. Eventually, I turn and start running for the shore as much as I can while being chest-deep in water. I squeal as I hear him closing in on me.

“No, no, no,” I laugh, getting closer and closer to safety.

“Should’ve thought about trying to run a little harder, love,” James says back, still giggling to himself.

He catches up to me when the water is finally below my hips, and grabs around the waist, pulling both of us backwards. The water goes over our heads for a moment, and I gasp out a laugh as we emerge again. He sits us up in the pond.

I turn in his arms, smacking him lightly on the chest. “You’re awful!”

“You love me,” he smiles brightly, still sitting on the ground in the shallow water. He pulls me in a little closer. “You’re just mad that I won.”

“Still can’t believe you said you didn’t like her,” I say, brushing some of his wet curls away from his eyes.

“Not gonna lie to the girl,” he shrugs, swatting away my hand.

“Still. I thought for sure you’d be excited.”

“Hm. I don’t know. Maybe a couple years ago, but not anymore.”

“At this point I’m convinced you’re driving girls away on purpose. When was the last time you dated someone?” I laugh.

He looks at me, mockingly offended. “Excuse me?”

“What?” I exclaim, still laughing. “Last girl I remember seeing you with was some Ravenclaw a few quidditch wins ago, and even then, you were just sucking face because you were drunk.”

He finally pushes me away from him, trying to hide a smile. I chuckle, gaining my bearings, and finally landing comfortably on my knees in the water a foot away from him.

“You wouldn’t be so offended if I were wrong,” I tease.

“Yeah? And when’s the last time you dated somebody?”

I scoff. “You scare off every boy who tries to ask me out.”

“Cause they’re all ridiculous,” he states, making a face. “Are you seriously telling me you wanted to go out with that Johnny kid from Hufflepuff?”

I smirk. “Touché. But still, it’s not my fault I’m not dating anyone. You, on the other hand…”

“What’s that supposed to me?” he quirks a brow.

“You’ve got all kinds of girls chasing after you. What’s your excuse?”

He pauses for a moment, then smirks. “Who else would waste all their time with you if I were too busy with some girl? You’d be all alone. I’m doing you a service by staying single.”

“Please. You and that ego, I swear,” I shake my head. “I have plenty of friends outside of you.”

“I’m the best one, though,” he says, a brow raised with a cocky smile.

I make a face, then splash him once more for good measure.

“That’s it,” he mumbles, tackling me.

I yell a little with a laugh as his arm wraps around my back and drops me onto the bank where the water was scarce. I keep my head propped up as much as I can, though the rest of me is still covered in a little bit of water. It doesn’t help that James is pressing me into the ground.

“Admit it. I am the single greatest person you’ve ever met.”

I laugh again. “In your dreams.”

“Not letting you up until you admit it.”

“Guess we’re stuck here forever, then,” I argue back.

“Guess so,” he says plainly, dropping his full weight on me. I groan, my breath getting squeezed from me. “Best to make myself comfortable, then.”

“You’re so heavy,” I whine.

He chuckles, just quietly observing me for a moment. I tilt my head in question as he doesn’t snark back. He swallows, a small smile still on his face, but a little bit of color now in his cheeks. My eyes widen a little bit.

“Jamie—”

He doesn’t give me a chance to get anything else out, his lips pressing to mine softly. I freeze, in shock at the sudden change of circumstance. My best friend is kissing me. He pulls away when he realizes I wasn’t kissing him back, his cheeks taking on a deeper shade.

“I’m sorry, I don’t…” he shakes his head, looking at me with his lips still parted. “I shouldn’t have done that. I’m sorry.”

He gets off of me quickly, getting out of the pond and back to where we left our clothes. He casts a drying spell on himself and starts getting dressed. Meanwhile, I’m still in the water, feeling like I’m stuck. I swallow with a dry throat, turning to see him starting to pull on his pants. I finally get up, quickly moving towards him.

“Jamie—“

“I’m sorry, I don’t know why I did that,” he shakes his head, not looking at me.

I let out a frustrated groan. “We have to talk about that, James.”

“Not right now. Just,” he sighs, looking at me quickly. He takes out his wand again, casting that same drying spell on me. “Get dressed. We don’t want to miss dinner.”

I stare at him for a moment as he continues putting his clothes on, then finally move to get mine on. We finish getting dressed in an uncomfortable silence, that kiss playing on repeat in my mind. Why would he do that?

I look at him when I’m done to see him staring at his shoes, his hands shoved in his pockets. I walk nearer to him, though he takes half a step back when he notices. I furrow my brow.

“Don’t start that.”

“Start what?” he asks, his voice uncharacteristically quiet.

“Pulling away from me,” I say, grabbing his arm and tugging him closer to me. “I don’t know what just happened, but I’m not going to lose you as a friend all because you—”

“I’m not pulling away from you,” he rolls his eyes. “I just— I don’t want to… I’m embarrassed. I shouldn’t have done that.”

“You don’t need to be embarrassed.”

He scoffs. “Right, because there’s nothing embarrassing about trying to kiss your best friend while she looks at you like you’re crazy.”

I sigh. “I just didn’t know what was happening. You’ve never done anything like that before.”

He looks away, chewing at his lip. “Can we just forget about it? I really don’t… I didn’t mean to.”

I fall quiet for a minute, trying to gather my thoughts, but they’re all seeming to escape me. I let go of his arm, taking in a deep breath.

“You know I love you, right?” I ask.

He nods. “Yeah. I know.”

“Okay. Yeah, we can forget about it,” I nod. “You want to go get dinner, then? I heard a rumor they’ll have those apple tarts you like.”

He looks at me, smiling a little bit. “Yeah?”

I nod again, smiling back. “Would I lie?”

He chuckles a little, nodding towards the way we came into the woods. I start leading the way back out until we see the castle again. He catches up to me at that point.

“Sorry again,” he says quietly.

“About what?” I ask, raising a brow. “All I remember is us swimming around. Unless you’re apologizing for tackling me in the pond, in which case, you’re forgiven only if you get me some chocolate frogs next time we’re in Hogsmeade.”

He smiles a little. “Yeah. Promise I will.”

“Good,” I say, knocking into his shoulder a little.

He nudges me back. Of course. I go a little harder the next time I knock into him, until we’re both practically pushing one another over as we head towards the castle. He gives me a particularly hard shove, barely catching me by the arm before I actually fall to the ground. We’re out of breath from laughing when we finally get to the castle, feeling wonderfully back to normal by the time we reach the Great Hall.

We walk up to the marauders, taking our usual seat across from the three boys.

“Hey,” I greet.

“Where were you two for the past hour?” Sirius asks with a quirked brow.

I snort a laugh. “Wouldn’t you like to know?”

“I would, considering we saw you wander off into the forest,” he says, leaning forward on his arms with a smirk.

I roll my eyes. “None of your business.”

“Always so secretive,” Remus says, stabbing a few potatoes on his fork before looking between us.

I glance at James who laughs as soon as we make eye contact. Though, I also catch another pair of eyes when I turn towards him, and wince a little. Lily looks at me with her brows furrowed from a little ways down the table. I shrug at her, unsure why she looks upset with me. She rolls her eyes, going back to her conversation with Dorcas. I sigh.

“Great. Now Lily’s mad at me because you had to go and turn her down,” I say to James.

Peter laughs. “He turned her down?”

“When did this happen?” Remus asks, looking much more curious now.

“You need to learn how to shut it,” James says to me, his voice a little high as he shakes his head.

“They would’ve found out anyways,” I say, barely feeling sorry at all.

I hold back from chuckling as James is pelted with questions from the boys, focusing more on my food and trying to ignore the occasional sour glance I get from Lily.

Though, I couldn’t escape her forever.

I walked into my room after a night of sitting around with the boys and Marlene in the common room. I thought I would be going to bed and falling asleep, but clearly it was wishful thinking. Lily stared at me from her bed as Marlene and I shut the door behind us.

I raised a brow. “Hi?”

Marlene looked between us, excusing herself to take a shower. The traitor.

“What the hell?” Lily said, crossing her arms.

“Yeah, what the hell? Why have you been giving me sour looks all day?”

She scoffed. “You told me to tell him, and you know what he did? Oh. Wait, of course you know. Because of course he already told you. Because of course—”

“Oh my god, Lily,” I roll my eyes, going to sit on my bed next to hers. “I’m sorry that I was wrong about how he’d react, but I had no clue. I thought he still had a thing for you.”

She huffs a sigh. “I should’ve known you were setting me up. What, do you like to see me embarrassed?”

“If I did, I would’ve gone along to watch it happen,” I say, annoyed at her attitude. “Sorry I was wrong, but I didn’t know. And you said you wanted to tell him, anyways.”

“You don’t seem to be that sorry considering you were back to hanging around him again all day.”

“He’s my best friend, Lily. I’m not going to ditch him because he didn’t have feelings for you,” I say, shaking my head.

She stands up suddenly. “Well, maybe you should. Maybe if you weren’t like… In love with him, you’d be a better friend to me.”

I stare at her in annoyance. “You need to get a grip. I wouldn’t have encouraged you to try telling him if I was ‘in love’ with him. We’re friends. You’re being insane.”

“Well, clearly he at least has feelings for you!”

I furrow my brow. “Excuse me?”

“Why else would he reject me?”

I laugh against my better judgement. “Are you serious? One boy doesn’t like you, so it just has to be because he’s in love with someone else? Lily, I love you, but that is the most egotistical thing you’ve ever said.”

“But you’re not denying it.”

“James isn’t in love with me. Have you considered that he just doesn’t like you anymore? It happens. People move on,” I say, sighing. “Just… Go to bed, Lily. This is a ridiculous and pointless argument.”

I lay back on my bed, closing my eyes while I wait to get into the bathroom. I hear Lily mutter something under her breath, but choose to ignore it. The more she got angry with me, the less I cared that she got her feelings hurt. I didn’t want to be unsympathetic, but it was getting hard to be concerned when I was blamed for a boy not liking her. Obviously James didn’t like me.

Obviously.

I think.

He did kiss me.

I open my eyes, staring at the ceiling for a moment. James didn’t like me, did he? He’d never shown interest in me before. That kiss probably just happened because he was confused. He wanted to forget about it, anyways, so clearly that had to mean he didn’t mean it. And I didn’t feel that way about him anyways, so it didn’t matter.

Except, I did feel my heart pound a little differently when he looked at me before the kiss.

I didn’t hate the way his lips felt.

Seeing him smile at me on the walk back did give me a few butterflies.

But, no. That’s nothing. He’s my best friend, I wouldn’t suddenly start feeling that way about him. I couldn’t. It’d be ridiculous.

It’s not like I’d spend the rest of the night thinking about him. Except that I did. A lot.

I woke up the next morning, feeling like I was going insane. I’d never felt that way about him before. Of course, I always though he was attractive. How could anybody look at him and not think he was gorgeous? But there was never anything more besides friendship. So why could I not stop thinking about him?

My eyes feel heavy as I sit in my last class of the day, James trying repeatedly to mess with me throughout the class. With five minutes left, he leans in closer. Since when did he start smelling so good?

“Hey,” he says quietly, drawing my attention. “What’s wrong? You’re not getting mad at me.”

“Just tired, Jamie,” I shrug, staring at the notes on the chalkboard that I haven’t copied down.

“That’s a lie. I can tell.”

I sigh. “Have you ever… Has anyone ever told you something about yourself that you thought wasn’t true, and then… And then you realize they might be right?”

He furrows his brows. “How do you mean?”

“I don’t know. Like, let’s say someone tells you that you like strawberries, when you’ve never liked strawberries. But then you think about every time you’ve had a strawberry, and you realize that you actually really did like strawberries. A lot more than you thought you did. Like… you realize strawberries are your favorite fruit.”

He stares with a confused look, tilting his head. He reaches up, pressing the back of his hand to my forehead.

“Are you feeling alright?”

I lean away from him, rolling my eyes. “Cut it out.”

He smiles, nudging me slightly. “Can’t say I’ve had that experience, no.”

I groan. “This sucks.”

“Why can’t you just tell me what actually happened?” he asks. He pouts. “Please?”

I smile at him, trying hard to be annoyed, but finding it difficult. *God, I’m in trouble.*

“I just can’t. It’s… private.”

“You never keep secrets from me.”

“I don’t even know what secret I’m keeping just yet,” I sigh, resting my chin in my hand. “I feel like I’m going crazy.”

“Aw,” he coos. “You say that like you aren’t already.”

I push him, laughing softly, though we both straighten up when the professor reprimands us. We give a quick apology, still smirking at each other the next time we catch one another’s eye.

The next days pass by in a blur as I come to terms with what I’ve been feeling. It doesn’t help that I couldn’t talk to anyone, especially since Lily was still mad at me. Now, though, I couldn’t blame her as much. She somehow realized I was into him before I did.

“Hey,” Remus says, coming up to me as I sit in the common room. “It’s late. Why are you still here?”

“Why are you?”

He shrugs, sitting next to me. “Can’t sleep. Moon’s coming in a couple days.”

I hum in acknowledgement. “Gotcha.”

He settles into the couch, crossing his arms over his chest. He looks sideways at me as I stare into the fire.

“You didn’t answer my question.”

“Cause I can’t tell anybody.”

He scoffs. “That’s ridiculous. You’ve been off for days. James keeps complaining about how you’re not spending time with him as much.”

I shake my head, not responding.

“You need to talk to someone about this.”

“Can’t.”

“Bullshit.”

I look at him. “Seriously. I can’t talk to Jamie about it, Lily’s still mad at me, and Marls and Dorcas are too gossipy.”

“You can talk to me,” he shrugs.

“You wouldn’t get it, though.”

“Try me.”

I let out a breath. “You have to promise this stays a secret.”

He nods. “Promise.”

“Okay,” I say under my breath. “Okay. So, um, Lily got really mad at me the other day because of the whole…. Confession thing. And I didn’t understand why, and she started accusing me of things, and obviously I disagreed… But then something she said kind of stuck with me.”

“She’s just mad. Don’t listen to her,” Remus says, shaking his head. “You know how she gets when she’s in one of those moods.”

“But I think she was kind of right,” I sigh. “That’s the problem. She thinks… She told me she thought I was into James. And not like friends, like really into him.”

Remus’s eyes widen a little. “And… are you?”

“I’ve been thinking about it for the past week, and… I think I might be.”

“Whoa. I know we always tease you two for how close you are, but I never thought you…”

“I know,” I groan, my face in my hands. “And I know I haven’t been hanging out with him as much as usual because of it, but I don’t know what to do. How do you tell your best friend that you suddenly realized you’re in love with him?”

He doesn’t answer, just reaches over and gives me a hug. I accept it, sighing a little.

Our next week goes over just like that. I don’t avoid James by any means, but I try not to always be alone with him. I do find more opportunities to talk with Remus about it all, though, and it helps. Just to have someone to listen to me as I complain about my feelings. I do the same for him when he has troubles, though mine seem silly in comparison. He always tells me not to compare, though.

Unfortunately, though, as much as those chats help me process my feelings, they don’t help me get over those feelings at all. If anything, they only grow the more I think about James.

It’s super annoying.

Even more annoying is Lily’s smug look when I tell her about my feelings for James. I expected her to be mad at me, but she did something worse: she laughed at me.

“I knew it!”

“How? I didn’t know!”

“Because you are so obvious,” she shakes her head.

I scoff. “I’m clearly not that obvious or else you wouldn’t have told me you had a crush on him.”

“Alright. Fair enough,” she quirks a brow. “But still.”

I roll my eyes, walking over to hug her.

“Sorry about that. If I knew I had a crush on him I wouldn’t have told you to go for him.”

“Sorry back,” she says. “Shouldn’t have gotten mad at you that he told me no.”

“I agree,” I laugh.

She whacks me in the arm, laughing back.

I try to go about my life as usual over the next couple of weeks. There’s no sense in making myself miserable or drawing attention to my small shift in behavior. I find myself still doing most of the same things I always did. Just a bit more carefully.

I sit with the boys at dinner, laughing at their stupid jokes and the plans they have for pranks. I finish my food, pushing the plate away from me, and listening in on a conversation being had between Sirius, Remus, and Peter.

“You know, those three plan on being out all night,” James says quietly, leaning close to me as he watches the three boys talk.

I raise a brow. “Yeah? Doing what?”

“They wanted to just be out of the castle for the night. Think Sirius and Remus are going to the shrieking shack, and Peter is sneaking out to go meet up with some other friends in Hogsmeade, I guess.”

“And you aren’t running off?”

He shakes his head. “Told them I’d stay behind. Thought me and you could have a sleepover. Like old times.”

I chuckle. “It has been a while.”

“I think close to a year. They’re always in my space,” he says, feigning annoyance. “But it’ll just be us tonight, if you want.”

I push down whatever feeling rises in my chest at that and agree, despite my better judgement.

He pulls me into his room that night, immediately going to the foot of his bed, looking at me like he’s about to change my life.

“I brought something a little… fun,” he smiles, opening up his trunk to show me his secret stash of drinks. “Thought we might finally crack it open.”

I laugh. “And you didn’t think to tell me sooner?”

“Hey, we’ve had plenty at the Gryffindor events,” he smiles. “This is just for us. Our secret.”

“You’re ridiculous.”

“I’m the greatest.”

We find ourselves on his floor after a few drinks, feeling fuzzy and happy. We talk about nothing for hours, occasionally passing a bottle between us.

“Maybe we should do this more often,” he says, smiling up at the ceiling. “I miss spending time with you like this.”

“We’re always together.”

“You spend a lot of time with Moony lately. Not fair, I want you all to myself,” he chuckles, poking my side.

I laugh, poking him back. “I’m still all yours. Love Moony so much, but you’re still my favorite I think. Now, if Sirius decided to start hanging around me more, then you’d be in trouble.”

He giggles, his cheeks rosy. I watch him carefully, feeling warm in the face myself, but for a different reason.

“You have a really cute laugh,” I say before I can think about it.

He looks at me with a smile, his tongue poking out between his teeth. “Yeah?”

“Yeah,” I nod.

“You’ve never told me that before.”

I shrug. “I should’ve.”

He stares back at me for a moment, giving me a little silly smile. He leans over me, propping himself up with his forehead next to my head. He leans down, much like he did that day we went swimming. But this time I kiss him back. My hand finds his cheek, holding him gently as I let him work his lips against mine. I can’t deny the warmth that spreads over me or the butterflies I feel this time.

This time it lasts for a few minutes, neither of us bothering to pull away. Whether that’s because he actually likes it or because we’re both drunk and don’t know any better, I don’t know. I also don’t care.

He finally pulls away after a little while, still giving me that smile as if he didn’t just take all the air in my lungs away from me.

“We can pretend that one didn’t happen, either,” he says, voice barely above a whisper.

I nod, unsure what to say. I don’t want to pretend it didn’t happen, but I couldn’t tell him that without outing myself. I settle for the way his hand mindlessly reaches for mine as we go back into conversation like nothing ever interrupted us in the first place. Eventually, we move to his bed, preferring the softness of the mattress and pillows over the hard ground.

“Can I ask why you’ve been spending all your time with Remus?” he asks during a lull in the conversation, playing with my fingers as he does.

“Just became better friends recently, I guess,” I say, glancing at him. I admire his face for a moment before snapping out of it. “Some stuff I can talk to him about that I haven’t been able to tell anyone else. It’s been nice to have someone to listen.”

“I could do that for you. You didn’t have to go to him.”

“Not this time, Jamie. It’s… different.”

“How?”

“It just is,” I sigh. “I’ve had too much to drink for us to be having this conversation, James.”

He whines. “Please? I just want to know.”

“No. Maybe I’ll tell you someday, but not now.”

He grumbles, turning over and resting his head on my chest. His arm rests over my stomach. I just hope and pray he doesn’t feel how hard my heart starts beating when he does.

“Play with my hair?” he asks, his voice a little muffled.

“Okay,” I reply softly, running my fingers through his messy hair. “This okay?”

He nods a little. “Mhm. Thanks.”

We don’t wake up until the next morning, still stuck in that same position.

I find myself with Remus again the following night. I sit on a chair, and he lounges on the couch, trying not to judge me for putting myself in that situation. I don’t tell him about the kiss, but he hears about everything else.

“You can’t keep doing this to yourself,” he says after a beat of silence when I finish explaining. “You either need to tell him, or put some distance between you.”

“I tried that today.”

“I know,” he rolls his eyes. “It’s all James could talk about. Complaining the whole day that you weren’t eating with us or not going to the library when we were.”

“See? I feel like nothing I do is right in this situation,” I say, feeling defeated. “Like, how am I supposed to keep spending time with him like everything’s normal when I’m practically floating every time he so much as looks at me. It’s pathetic. And I can’t just ignore him, cause then he goes and bugs you all.”

“Maybe you just need to—”

“Hey,” James’s voice calls from behind us.

I look at him, noticing the annoyed look on his face. It doesn’t seem like he’s overheard us, but I can’t tell why he looks so irritated. Usually he’d be annoyed if I didn’t bother with them all day, but he looks… mad. I quirk a brow.

“Hey,” I say, confused.

He doesn’t reply, looking a little upset and a little lost. I turn back to Remus after a moment of silence, our conversation effectively being cut short. I stand up quickly.

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” I say to Remus, starting to walk past James in order to get to my room.

“What’s going on?” James asks, grabbing my upper arm.

I turn around quickly. “What?”

He clenches his jaw, then looks at Remus. “Moony, we need a minute.”

Remus goes to argue, but drops it quickly when he sees James looking more serious than he ever has. He gets up, giving me a sympathetic look before he heads towards the boys’ dorms. I glare at James as he hasn’t let go of my arm yet.

“Why did you do that?”

“Why are you with him again?”

I scoff. “You mean our friend? Did you ever think maybe we were talking?”

“That’s the problem,” he says, dropping my arm.

“How is that a problem? I’m going through something and he’s just trying to help—”

He sighs harshly, looking around like he’s lost. He looks back at me with his brows furrowed.

“I don’t get it,” he says, practically whining. “You never keep things from me, and now you’re telling Moony all of your secrets and ditching me for him and… And I don’t understand it. We’re supposed to be best friends.”

“We are, Jamie, there’s just some things that I can’t—”

“Why not?” he swallows, tears starting to prick his eyes. “Why can’t you tell me? You never do this. We tell each other everything.”

I freeze for a moment, my mouth drying up as I look at him. I want to reach out for him and hold him and make him feel better. But I also want answers, because it’s his fault that everything got screwed up. He didn’t have to reject Lily. He didn’t have to kiss me when we were swimming. He didn’t have to do it again on his bedroom floor. He didn’t have to treat me like I was the most important person in his life.

“Then tell me why you kissed me,” I blurt out.

He shakes his head a little. “I don’t know.”

“Then figure it out! You don’t just get to kiss me and then act like you just did it for no reason.”

His chest heaved from his breathing, staring at me. His cheeks tinged pink again as he took a moment.

“I—I just wanted to. I don’t know. You were there and you were looking at me like that and you just…” he huffed a sigh. “I just wanted to kiss you.”

“Why?” I asked, frustrated.

“Because,” he said back, his tone matching mine. “Because I always want to kiss you and I slipped up and did it one time—”

“You did it twice!”

“Okay! Two times,” he exclaims. “We promised we would just forget about it.”

“And what exactly is that even supposed to mean?”

“You’re so fucking oblivious,” he grumbles, rolling his eyes. “God, what do I have to do to make you understand that I’m—”

I wait as he stops talking. “That you’re what?”

“I’m in love with you. I have been forever, and you’ve never cared,” he says, letting out a shuddering breath. “And now you’re spending all of your time with Remus. And it’s so embarrassing that I’m sat here hopelessly in love with my best friend of over ten years while she’s running around with another one of our friends.”

“Running around with him? We sit in the common room and talk because you’re fucking infuriating!”

“Oh, so you’re gossiping about me?” he asks, voice raising as mine does once again.

“Not gossiping, just—”

“Just what?”

“I’m in love with you, too, you fucking tosser!”

He looks angry for a few moments, then it switches to confusion, then shock, and possibly the five stages of grief before he finally lands on raised brows and an open mouth.

“You what?” he exclaims.

“You’re so annoying,” I say, groaning. “Yeah, Lily had to go and tell me I was in love with you, and she always has to be fucking right about everything, doesn’t she?”

“Are you listening to yourself right now?” he asks incredulously, furrowing his brows. “You just told me you loved me.”

“I’m aware, James,” I say, crossing my arms.

“Well… Did you mean it?”

“Obviously,” I say, shaking my head at him like it was a dumb question.

“You’re so dumb,” he says under his breath.

Before I can say anything else, he’s moving forward, his hands on my cheeks as he crashes his lips into mine. I melt into him, this kiss being way more passionate than the one we shared the night before. I hold onto his waist, letting him deepen the kiss, though it only lasts for a minute or two after that.

He pulls away. “You’re infuriating. Why didn’t you tell me before?”

“You didn’t tell me anything, either!”

“I kissed you twice!”

I roll my eyes. “That doesn’t count. You said we should forget about both times.”

“Only cause I thought that’s what you’d want,” he defends, making an annoyed face.

I try to be angry, but it’s a difficult task. I reach up, running a thumb over his furrowed eyebrows.

“So grumpy,” I mutter. “Just told you I was in love with you. You’d think you’d at least try to be happy.”

He scoffs a laugh, pulling me into a hug, his face buried in my neck.

“I’ve never been happier.”

We hear footsteps coming down a few minutes later.

“You owe me ten galleons,” Sirius’s voice says.

I look over James’s shoulder as he keeps holding onto me, not caring that our friends are right there.

“You were betting on us?” I ask.

Sirius nods with a smirk. “And Peter just lost. He thought you’d take until the end of the year to get together. I said it’d be in this term.”

“I didn’t bet,” Remus says from behind Sirius, holding his hands up in surrender with a small smile. “Glad you worked it out, though.”

I smile at them, shaking my head and turning my attention back on James again. He looks at me finally.

“I’m glad, too,” he says quietly. “Think I might’ve combusted if I had to keep pretending I didn’t want you like that.”

“Didn’t do a great job at covering for it, though. Still kissed me twice.”

“You say like you didn’t love it,” he smirks with a wink.

————-> SMUT STARTS HERE. 18+ <-————

James finally pulls away, taking my hand in his.

“Good, now that you’re all out the room, if you’ll excuse us…” he says, pulling me past the boys who all groan in disgust.

I giggle as he practically runs to his room with my hand in his, kissing me the second the door is shut and locked. I smile into the kiss, my arms around his neck. He starts kissing my cheek and jaw after a few minutes.

“Hope you’ve been feeling the tension as much as I have, cause I could probably cum in my pants right now if you asked me to,” he says casually, as if it wouldn’t send a wave of arousal down my body.

“Oh my…” I trail off as he bites at my neck softly. “Are we gonna…?”

He pauses, his eyes wide. “Oh. I probably should’ve asked before I assumed, huh?”

He winces a little at his own excitement, cheeks tinged pink.

“Sorry.”

I smile softly. “That’s okay. I— I want to, I just didn’t know if that’s what the plan was.”

He smiles again brightly, kissing me once more. He giggled against my lips, then starts backing me towards the bed.

“I really do love you. Kind of embarrassing, really. I think I have forever,” he says softly, laying me down on the mattress and crawling over me.

I let out a soft breath. “Embarrassing for me, I think. I didn’t even realize until someone else told me I did.”

He laughs again, starting to kiss down my neck.

“I kind of always wanted you to be my first time, to be honest,” he says against my skin.

I pause, realizing what’s really happening. “Oh. Oh my god.”

“What?” he asks, leaning up to start unbuttoning my shirt.

“Wait, have you never… You haven’t done this either, have you?”

“Not all the way,” he shakes his head, then looks at me with wide eyes. “Is that okay?”

“That’s okay. I haven’t either. Just… You know. I’ve done some hand stuff but that was it.”

He looks at me again, then starts laughing a little. I find myself laughing right back as reality sets in for both of us.

“We’re gonna take each others virginity,” I say, still laughing a little. “Oh my god.”

He snorts a laugh. “Didn’t wake up this morning thinking this would happen, that’s for certain.”

I smile. “I love you.”

“I love you more,” he teases, dropping a kiss on the tip of my nose.

I watch as he finishes taking off my shirt, getting up just enough to help him pull it and my camisole off completely. He sits back on his knees, staring at me for a moment.

“You alright, Jamie?”

He nods. “Doing great, love.”

He starts taking off his own shirt, then. As many times as I’d seen his arms and chest, you’d think I wouldn’t still feel amazed seeing him in just his trousers… But I couldn’t stop staring, either. He leaned back in, kissing me again. I let my hands run over his arms and back, having free reign to do so and enjoying it. He nipped at my lip, a little noise leaving me and making him smile against my lips. I do the same to him, both of us ending up grinning at each other again.

“This is nice,” I say quietly. “Doing this with you, it’s nice. I like that we don’t feel like we have to act… sexy.”

“Well, that because it’s never an act for me, love,” he winks with a smirk.

I pull him back down with a giggle, though the smile is wiped from my face when he rolls his hips into mine. Feeling him hard for me for the first time leaves me a little breathless, especially when he’s grinding into me. I small groan leaves me when he does it again.

“Like it when you do that,” he says into my ear, doing it again just to get another reaction out of me. “I like those little sounds you make. So pretty.”

I find myself breathing heavily, my hands squeezing between our bodies to start unbuckling his belt. He gets the hint and sits up, pulling it off himself.

“Get out of those, yeah?” he says, nodding at my bottoms as he works himself out of his.

I comply immediately, shimmying out of my trousers and tossing them onto the ground. He gets back on top of me as soon as we’re both one layers closer to what we really want. I let my hand slide into his underwear as he stars kissing at my neck again, letting out a shuddering breath when I finally feel him. He whimpers into my neck as I start stroking him, rutting his hips into my hand.

“Feel so good, love,” he says, voice whiny and desperate.

I groan back, especially as one of his hands slides under the band of my panties to slip a finger into me. I feel myself growing hotter, kissing him and swallowing the moans he lets out as my hand keeps working him over.

“Shit, Jamie,” I moan as he adds a second finger.

“Good for you?” he breathes out.

“Yes,” I say breathlessly. “Yes. Very.”

I whine as he gets me closer to the edge, his hips doing all the work as my hand stopped moving up and down his length. He adds pressure to my clit with his thumb, sending me careening over the edge with praises and his name on my lips.

He pulls his hand away from me suddenly.

“Can’t wait any longer, love,” he says, voice wrecked.

He slides my panties off my legs as I take my bra off. Then, I watch with wide eyes as he pulls his underwear off, his cock bigger than I was expecting by far. I knew he felt big, but seeing him was entirely different.

“Fuck,” I say, staring at him. “Don’t know if I can take that, Jamie.”

“Yeah, you can, love,” he nods, settling between my legs and kissing me softly. “You can take it, baby.”

He pushes himself up just enough for both of us to see him rubbing his head through my slick before prodding at my entrance. He starts pushing in slowly. I let out a loud groan, my eyes shutting.

“Shh, just relax, love,” he says, lips hovering over mine. “You’re doing so good. Taking it so well, baby.”

He whimpers against my lips as he keeps pushing in slowly.

“So big, Jamie,” I moan, watching him disappear inside of me.

“I know, baby,” he says, a few more little noises spilling from his mouth. “I know, but you’re being so good. My good girl.”

He bottoms out, both of us panting and holding onto each other as I adjust to the new feeling. It hurts a little, but not in a bad way. Especially when he starts moving. That bit of pain makes way for a lot of pleasure once he starts rocking into me at a steady pace, whining and moaning into my ear.

“S’good, Jamie. You feel so good,” I say, trying to catch my breath.

“So good for me, baby. Squeezing me nice,” he whines, pinning me down under the weight of his body. “Good girl. So proud of you taking me so well.”

“Gonna cum again,” I say, feeling it building in my stomach again.

“Me too, baby. Just a little more,” he says, pressing his face into my neck again. “Don’t want to be done so soon, but you feel so perfect. You’re so good for me.”

I moan at his ramblings of praise, his words only causing me to get closer to that peak again. I hold onto him tightly, my body wrapped around his as he fucks into me like we’d done it a million times before. I speak his name over and over and over again as I crash down, my eyes rolling back from the intensity of the orgasm, and the fact that he doesn’t stop fucking me through it.

Though, near the end of my peak, he moans out a hundred more praises, my name falling from his lips as I feel him fill me up with his cum. He whimpers again against my skin as he finishes, not stopping the movement of his hips until he’s visibility overstimulated.

We breathe heavily, holding onto one another tightly as we come down from our highs, his hair sticking to his forehead as he leans in to kiss me softly again.

“Holy shit,” he whispers. “You’re perfect.”

I breathe out, a small smile on my face. “You… Yeah. Oh my god. I thought the first time was supposed to be bad.”

“It was perfect for me. But I barely lasted, it couldn’t have been that great for you,” he says, looking a little disappointed that he might not have done a good job for me.

I shake my head. “You still made me come harder than I ever have. You were incredible, Jamie. I mean it.”

He smiles softly. “I’m gonna have to kick them out of here more often. I might be addicted now.”

“And we have more things to try,” I add. “Can’t let this happen only once a week or something. Too much to figure out, I think.”

He giggles again. “Like what?”

“I’d really like you in my mouth next time.”

His smile drops. He starts nodding quickly. “Yes. Yeah, I’ll kick them out at two in the morning if you ask. Whatever you want.”

I laugh, pulling him into another kiss.

“Now, we have to figure out that contraceptive spell, or else we might be in some trouble,” I say with a smile.

“Sorry about that,” he smirks, clearly not sorry. “I’m sure Sirius knows it.”

“Please. As if he isn’t fucking Remus whenever those two run off to the shrieking shack.”

James’s eyes widen. “What?”

I snort a laugh.

“And you called me the oblivious one.”

#james potter #james potter x fem!reader #james potter x you #james potter x reader #james potter fluff #james potter smut #james potter fic #james potter fanfiction #best friend!james #bsf!james potter #marauders smut #marauders fluff #marauders fanfiction #marauders fic #marauders x reader #marauders #luna still hates jk

[daycourtofficial]

The Shadows Want You to be Happy

Summary: Azriel’s shadows overhear a conversation where you doubt Azriel’s true intentions, and they urge him to rectify the situation.

Author’s note: this is just pure fluff baby! Pure unadulterated fluff. Go to the dentist! Also I didn’t proofread this, so enjoy at your own caution!

His shadows didn’t mean to spy on you, they promise. They just liked keeping an eye on you at all times.

Azriel had no idea why his shadows seemed to adore you so much - well, he could understand it, because he adored you just as much as his shadows did. But he can’t figure out why - they don’t like being around Elain, but most of the others the shadows just watch.

Not you, though. Whenever you two are in the same room his shadows roam over you, greeting an old friend. If he’s been away for a days on a mission, they spend several minutes swirling around you, seemingly doting on you, like they’re asking “are you okay? Did you eat while we were gone? Did you sleep?”

A few shadows have taken it upon themselves to stay stationed with you at all times. He thinks they have a schedule, out of jealousy and need to share their time with you, but they don’t really tell him too much about what they see. The most they’ll tell him is if you haven’t eaten in a while or that time they told him about you having a cold and not wanting anyone to find out. He spent three days in your apartment with you, feeding you soup and taking care of you.

His shadows absolutely do not tell him the things you say or how you’re feeling, or so he thought. Both of the shadows that were asking as your bodyguards came to him, like little kids with a story to tell.

-

You were laying on the couch in the library with Feyre, engrossed in your independent books. The two of you do this weekly, enjoying each other’s presence without much social obligation. Sometimes the two of you will talk, but it’s often followed by long, comfortable silences. Just when you thought the silence was going to stay for a while, Feyre spoke up.

“so, sweetie, how are things with you and Azriel?” She asks, closing her book to turn to you.

Your cheeks heat immediately. “Um,” you say, closing your book to turn to her, knowing that she won’t relent until she gets what she wants out of this conversation.

You had kept your feelings for him mostly to yourself, except one drunken night a few weeks ago you had told Feyre about how pretty he was. You thought she might have forgotten about it, but this conversation is telling you she wants more. Thank the mother it wasn’t Rhys or Cas you had told that to - they would have mocked your word choice of “devastatingly pretty” for years.

“Well, we have plans to go out tonight,” you reply, very nervous about opening up to Feyre. She looked at you, her face asking for you to continue. “We’re trying all of the bakeries in Velaris to see who has the best pastries and hot chocolate, so once a week we try a new one and gorge ourselves on baked goods and chocolate.”

Feyre smiled at how absolutely adorable that was. “Are these… dates?” she asks, smiling at how absolutely oblivious the two of you were.

“We call them dates,” you reply.

“Do you two do anything physical? You don’t have to be gratuitous with details, I’m not Mor.” Feyre says, shuddering thinking of Mor grilling you for details on if the two of you have had sex yet.

“Um well the bakeries are usually cozy so we usually are tucked away in a corner, pressed up together. In one of them we had to wait for a table, so he just wrapped his wings around me while we waited.” You told her, grinning at the memory of his body heat.

“Do you two ever kiss?”

You sink a little further into the couch, your cheeks blazing with heat now, your hands covering your face as you say, “yes”.

“Has there been more than kissing?”

Feyre watches the head hiding behind youe hands nod ever so slightly and squeals. She actually squeals.

The people of Velaris love to gossip with her, and when she heard rumors of two of her friends being spotted around town looking very coupley, she decided to investigate. It also doesn’t help that the Inner Circle has a betting pool on when you ans Azriel will get together. Her bet was this week, so she’s doing what she can to win. And because she wants the two of you to be happy. And because Cassian bet that you two would be together next week, and she can’t lose to him, his gloating is atrocious.

“So, you two are together?” She asks, practically bouncing in her seat.

“I’m not sure,” you say, “honestly I’m a little worried that this means more to me than it does to him.” You look down at your hands, “I don’t really do casual dating, and I’m a little worried that this is just a fling to him. It’s really incredible and hot and sweet and all but.” You look around to see if anyone is listening before you whisper, “honestly, it would break my heart if this was just casual for him.”

Feyre was shocked at how sad you looked at the idea of being something casual to Az. She knew the two of you were head over heels for each other, they all knew that, but you looked devastated.

“Sweetie,” she says, trying her best to console you, “there is no way that that male views you or anything to do with you as ‘casual’.“

“Are you sure?” You ask, hesitation lacing your every word.

“Absolutely. He lights up whenever you’re around and I’ve never seen him miss a function you’re at.”

You thank your friend for the reassurances and settle back into your respective books. You knew that Azriel’s shadows often followed you around, even without him being anywhere nearby. He once told you that they find you adorable. However, you didn’t realize that the two who were stationed with you left very quickly after your discussion with Feyre.

-

The shadows relayed the whole story to him, in part because they, like the inner circle, want the two of you together. But also because they understand that you were upset and Azriel could fix it.

Azriel was more shocked at the insistence from them to make you less upset - usually they are just uninvolved observers, simply passing along information to him, allowing him to draw his own conclusions. The way those shadows spoke to him you’d think that they were in charge of him.

He met you outside of your apartment later that night, dressed in an all black casual outfit. “Ready?” He asks, extending his arm out for you to take. You lock the door behind him, straightening your coat before taking his arm.

The two of you start these dates off by walking through Velaris. Winter has just begun and there’s a light falling of snow covering the two of you.

“What’d you get up to today? I haven’t seen you since breakfast,” he asks you, not-so-subtly reminding you that you were, in fact, his breakfast, before he left your apartment this morning.

“I spent most of the day in the library with Feyre, reading a few books, doing some research. I had to get out of there, the words were all starting to blend together,” you reply, nuzzling into his arm to retain some of his heat, despite his jacket covering his arms.

“Mm, well then I guess you could consider me you’re handsome knight, off to whisk you away for an evening of delicacies in your time of need,” he retorts.

You chuckle and begin to speak, not stopping yourself before blurting, “why are you only like this with me? Don’t get me wrong, I love this side of you, but you only show it to me. Why’s that?”

Azriel stops your walk to stand in front of you, “ignoring your recent declaration of love,” you huff, “I just.. feel different around you.”

The look he’s giving you makes your knees go weak. He’s looking into your eyes with deep, raw honesty, like he wants you to see inside his soul.

“I love my family, despite their best efforts to annoy me into murdering them,” he says. You giggle. “But you’re.. different. The way I feel about you is different. I thought I loved Mor, but I didn’t. I loved the idea of saving her, of being her knight.” He sighs, unbelieving that he’s spilling all of this to you out in public. Luckily the other pedestrians just ignore the two of you, out of kindness or fear of him, he’s not sure. He pulls you into a quiet little alley, in the hopes to retain some privacy.

“It was stupid, but I thought I could save the girl and we’d live happily ever after. Then I met you. When I was a kid, I always wanted someone to come rescue me, and I thought that that was how you fall in love. But it’s not. I didn’t need to save you to love you. After this big revelation about myself, I took some time to really think about what I want. It’s why a few weeks back everyone thought I went to check on the war camps. Well, I did check on them, but I spent most of the time thinking. And I want you, no rescuing required. Though if you’d have me, I’d rescue you from anything. A bad day, my annoying family, the flu, anything. I’m not sure how clear my intentions have been, I figured showing you off around Velaris was enough, but I guess not.”

He paused, a mixture of nerves and intense determination radiating off of him.

“I haven’t thought about another person since I met you. I haven’t even considered looking at anyone else. Rhys has started calling me a puppy, because I follow you around everywhere, and I don’t care. I’ve never been so public with anyone, not giving a damn who sees or what they think, because I want them to know that you’re with me. I want everything you’ll give me.”

You’re stunned. It’s so quiet, you can hear the snow falling. It’s as if the world has gone silent to hear what you’ll say.

“Anything I’ll give you?” You say, a smirk crossing your face, wanting to draw out his confession a bit more.

“Anything.”

“Even if I snore?” You ask.

He laughs, “you don’t snore. You’re actually quite adorable when you’re asleep, hate to break it to you.”

“Hmm,” you say, stroking your finger on your chin, looking quizzical. “Guess you’ll just have to get used to my adorable sleeping, because if you’re accepting it, I’m giving you everything.”

He leans down, capturing your laugh with his lips, his shadows dancing around the two of you in excitement.

He pulls away after several minutes, laughing at the groan coming from your lips, “did you know that the idiots have a bet about us?”

He begins again after seeing your confused face, “If we’re together this week, Feyre wins the betting pool. Next week is Cassian.”

“Oh!” You exclaim, “that’s why she wanted us to be together so badly! Hm, maybe we should let Feyre win, because Cassian would be-

“Unbearable.” You both say in unison.

“When should we tell them? And how?” You ask.

“Not tonight. Maybe tomorrow we can just have sex on the dining room table, that’ll send the message loud and clear.” He says, raising his eyebrows suggestively.

You swat his arm, “no, we’re better than Cassian and Nesta. Maybe we should have a banner made. It’ll say “we had sex!” And point down to us.”

He chuckles, grabbing your arm again and steering you towards the bakery, as the two of you contemplate how to tell your family the news that will make them all so incredibly happy.

#azriel #azriel x reader #azriel x you #azriel fanfic #azriel fluff #acotar fanfiction

[kingkatsuki]

He just wants to be good enough for you always🥺

Warnings: fluff, reader has a mum and dad.

Pairing: Bakugou Katsuki x f!reader.

Word Count: 1.1k.

You know how he feels.

It was the same feeling that bubbled inside your tummy when you were meeting his parents for the first time. Feeling silly for being so nervous the minute you stepped through the door as you were welcomed into a fierce hug by Mitsuki. A large photo album strewn over both your laps as Masaru offered you some homemade dorayaki.

“It ain’t the same thing,” He scoffs, staring at his reflection in the mirror as he pulls his tie out of its loop to start all over.

“How is it not the same?” You laugh from your position at your vanity, stroking your clear gloss against your lips as you watch him struggle with his tie again.

“They need to know that I can take care of ya,” He pushes, cursing under his breath when he looped the tie.

There’s something that convinces him that he’ll somehow never be good enough for you. The self-doubt and insecurity that’s plagued him since childhood rears its ugly head for situations like these— situations that have your usually strong and confident boyfriend reduced to that same terrified little boy.

“They know you take care of me, baby.” You turn in your chair to face him.

“I ain’t even number one yet, and they need to believe I’m good enough to look after their little girl?” He drops his tie in exasperation as it sits around his neck.

Standing up from your position at his vanity as you make your way over to him. Cupping his hands in your smaller ones as you lace your fingers together at your sides. Squeezing reassuringly as you practically feel his heart pounding against his ribcage, brows furrowed as you smile up at him.

“They won’t care about any of that, Katsuki.” You coo, feeling how sweaty his palms have become from preparing to meet your parents, “All they’ll care about is that you’re treating me well, and that you’re a good man.”

“A good man that leaves you for weeks at a time.” He scoffs.

It’s always a sore spot in your relationship when Bakugou has to leave for work. The best missions always seem to be the ones that take him further away from home than either of you would like. The biggest boosts to his hero ranking always seem to mean the longer trips, phone calls and FaceTimes at unsociable hours the things that keep you both close. But he always keeps his promise to return back to you safely, little gifts from the destination that reminded you of him.

“You do what you have to do, and I understand so they will too.” You reach your hands up to his forgotten tie. Slowly wrapping the fabric around to begin to loop it, pulling it through as he keeps his crimson gaze on you, “There’s no one else for me, Katsuki. Never will be.”

Bakugou would steal the sun in the sky for you if he could, submerge the entire world into darkness if it meant that only you could see it’s glow. There isn’t a single thing he wouldn’t do for you, and if only everyone could see that. The scrutinising tabloid articles and online posts still attack his character, wondering how a man as bold and brash as Dynamight could ever love anyone. But he proves it to you daily, through his words and actions.

You’d found a good one in Bakugou Katsuki, the perfect man. And you’d spend every day fighting his corner if you had to.

“Do you think I should bring that award I got last week? I think it might show your parents that—”

“Katsuki,” You cut off his rambling, shaking your head, “They don’t need to see that to know you’re successful. And I’m pretty sure my mum’s shown an article about that to all of her friends already.”

“I just want them to know that I can look all after ya,” He continues, “Even though my last mission ran over.”

A three week mission had turned into six after Bakugou had discovered the villain he had been tracking down was at the centre of a huge drug ring, the extra three weeks had meant taking down the entire operation but it had meant leaving you alone for Christmas— when he was first supposed to meet them.

“They understood, Kats.”

“I think your ma was pissed.” He scoffs.

“Not as pissed as yours,” You laughed, “She spent the entire evening complaining about it when I dropped off our gifts for them.”

“That old hag,” He shook his head, “She still goes on about that, you know. Doesn’t matter that I jumped up fifty points because of it.”

“No matter what happens— I love you, so they will too.” You smooth your palm along his chest to lay his neatly tied tie down flat against his dress shirt. His hand reaching up to try and tug at the uncomfortable collar as you grin up at him. Standing up on tiptoes to steal a kiss before wiping your gloss from his lips with your thumb, an action that’s halted by him licking his lips to taste the sticky sweetness as he pulls his head back.

“You’re such a dork.” You laugh, shaking your head as you turn around to check your face in the full length mirror.

“Yeah, but I’m your dork.” He hums, wrapping his arms around your waist as he settles his chin against your shoulder.

“Yeah, you are.” You smile, resting your hands on his arms as he sways you side to side, “But I hope you’re ready for my mum to grill you about when we’re having kids.”

“Our ma’s together are gonna be a fuckin’ nightmare.” Bakugou groans, hiding his eyes in the curve of your neck as you start laughing.

“I’d expect nothing less for our relationship.” You smiled, “I’m still recovering from your proposal.”

“Oi,” Bakugou’s arms tightened around your waist, “It ain’t my fault that villain ruined the perfect fuckin’ proposal.”

#I never had a nuclear family so I tried😂 #soft bakugou #bakugou x reader #bakugou fluff #katsuki bakugou x reader

[going-to-ikea-for-the-fries]

Mi Querida Esposa || Alejandro Vargas

For @glitterypirateduck's “Amor a Alejandro” writing challenge! I used prompt 16. "Nothing is ever simple".

Rating: G Words: 2.6K Tags: f!reader, you/your pronouns but no Y/N, Spanish terms of endearment, best friends to lovers, forced marriage (but not like THAT), friendly bickering, drinking, kissing, no smut. Summary: Alejandro's parents have been pestering him to settle down and get married. He lies that he and reader (his best-friend) are dating. The lie snowballs. a/n: I imagined that both Alejandro and reader are Mexican! Only curse words and terms of endearment are in Spanish.

a/n #2: I wrote a follow-up for this one shot: Check here

“Please, it’s just dinner!” Alejandro said as he stood in your kitchen at 6 P.M.

You had just gotten home from work, and barely had time to kick off your shoes and start on dinner when the front door to your apartment opened and your best friend came strolling in.

Not even a minute later, he was groveling (on his feet, because he’s too proud to do it on his knees) for your help.

“Are you drunk, Ale?” You ask him as you continue stirring the pasta in the boiling water so it doesn’t stick.

“No, I’m not.” He replies loudly as he gets as close to you as possible, leaning his hip on the counter next to him. “Please.” He pleads again. “It’s really simple, I promise you!” He continues.

“Simple? Ale, nothing is ever simple with you!” You retort as you use your hand to pinch the bridge of your nose. “You’ve just asked me to marry you!” You ask him as you look up at him.

Sometimes you resent yourself for being such a good actress. It’s part of the reason why you find yourself pretending not to like Alejandro as much as you do. You swear you want to be a bit more caring and affectionate toward him… but you always end up bickering with him and giving him attitude.

“Please!” He turns you away from the pasta pot and puts both hands on your shoulders, staring at you like a deranged, desperate man. 

“Vato [dude], nobody is going to believe that we’re dating, let alone wanting to get married.” You tell him as you give him a deadpan, unconvinced look.

There was a time in the past when you would’ve bent yourself over backward for an opportunity to date (or say that you’re dating) Alejandro. But that was ages ago, a crush you have long since outgrown… Or so you think.

“Ay carajo [For fuck’s sake], they don’t have to 100% believe it! Just have to instill reasonable doubt!” He attempts to reason. “Please, flaca [skinny girl*]!” He tells you.

You shake away his hands from your shoulders and set your hands on your hips over your apron. “Why don’t you just go out and find yourself an actual girlfriend, for once?” You retort.

“This, again?” He grumbles. “I. already. told. you!” He says while slapping his right hand against his palm to punctuate his sentence. “I don’t have the time or the patience to go out and meet someone!” He groans in frustration. “I’m busy with work!”

“Ale, you’re a grown man and an Army Colonel at that.” You remind him. “You’re telling me you’re scared of telling your parents you’re focused on your career?” You add in a teasing, mocking tone.

“Oye! I’m not scared!” He denies it as he points a finger in your face. “I just wanted them to stop annoying me!” He adds as he looks away and grumbles under his breath.

“And you think lying about being in a relationship with me would make it better?” You scold him and nod your head in an act of defiance. “Your parents know me, Ale, they’ll realize that we’re not dating the moment they see us!”

“They kept pestering me to get married, loca [crazy girl], I had to lie.” He grumbles in reply as he throws his hands up and turns away. “And it did make it better!” He retorts and waves his hands in the air. “They were off my case for the last 6 months!” He adds.

“SIX MONTHS?!” You ask as your jaw drops. “You told them this SIX MONTHS AGO and didn’t think to tell me before?” You scold him. He turns to look at you like a naughty kid being lectured by his mother, his face set into a grimace. 

“What if I crossed paths with your mamá [mom] at the market, huh?!” You ask in shock as you point at yourself with both hands. “What would’ve happened then? What if someone had seen me on a date with another man?!” You add in surprise.

“But you didn’t! And I know you would’ve had my back if she started asking questions!” He adds, which causes you to glare at him angrily.

Alejandro hangs his head before taking a long, deep breath. “I’m sorry, okay?!” He ends up saying earnestly. “I just wanted them to stop acting like I’m a disgrace for being 38, single, and, allegedly, ‘miserable’!” He justified himself.

“But you are miserable and single!” You retort. As punishment, he wraps an arm around you and gives you a noogie. “Ay, puta madre [for fuck’s sake], Alejandro!” You demand as you slip away from the headlock, smacking at his arm in the process.

Alejandro takes a step toward you again and sets his hands on your shoulders once more, his eyes locked onto yours. “Please, cuata [twin/bestie].” He pleads. “Just this once.” He requests.

“Just ‘this once’? Are you serious?” You ask as you dip your head to the side, looking up at him like he’s lost his mind. “You just told me your parents invited your entire family over for dinner to celebrate our ‘engagement’ and start planning our wedding, Ale!” You remind him. “How is it going to be ‘just this once’?” You add.

“We can pretend to break up after this!” He retorts, making you sigh loudly and rub your eyes with your fingers. “Or… we can get married… for the tax benefits!” He adds, which causes you to look at him sharply, eyes widened and your hand raised to smack him.

“Okay, okay! I’m joking!” He adds while raising his hands defensively. In a lot of ways, you and Alejandro behave like siblings, always at each other’s throats… Only to turn around and have each other’s backs… like now. “Please.” He pleads again.

You take a long, deep, desperate breath and exhale sharply before turning around to strain out the water of your cooked pasta. “Fine…” You grumble under your breath. “But you owe me, big time!” You add.

“YES!” He shouts excitedly and shakes his fists in the air. “Thank you, thank you…” Alejandro says thankfully and wraps his arms around you in a bear hug which, definitely, makes you hear some bones of yours cracking.

“But!” You add, interrupting his celebration, which causes him to let go of you. “It’s only this dinner thing! And after that… in a couple of months, you’ve gotta tell them we ‘broke up’!” You demand.

“No, absolutely. I’ve already got a plan for that and everything!” Alejandro nods earnestly. “Just trust me.” He adds.

-

“I still can’t believe this.” You grumble as throw yourself onto the leather couch, which creaks as you sit. You feel exhausted. Your feet hurt, your cheeks are sore from smiling so much, you’re sweaty, your make-up is a bit messy, and you drank a bit more tequila than you should.

Alejandro sits on the leather couch beside you, rubbing his forehead and eyes with one hand while the other clutches a lowball glass of tequila. “You’ve said that 12 times now.” He grumbles.

You turn to look at him, your brow set low and your lips twisted into a pursed scowl. “And I’ll keep saying it!” You exclaim. “Because I can’t. believe. this.” You add.

Alejandro looks up at you before shooting the tequila shot in his chilled glass. “You’re the one that let our mamás talk you into this.” He retorts.

“Shut up.” You grumble defensively as you shuffle over, the gown rustling as you slide closer to him. He fills the glass with another double shot of Don Julio, and this time hands it over to you, which you take, gladly.

For the last 3 months since that dinner party at Alejandro’s parents’ house, you’ve dreaded this moment… The wedding itself, sure, but the moments after, the days after… When you’ve been freshly married and have to move in together and have all those changes to your routine…

But, right now, the dread is mostly gone. You could probably blame it on the tequila and the culmination of the stress, but right now, it almost feels… relieving to be here, in this hotel room, with your best friend/husband.

“That suit makes it look like you’re going to meet the President.” You grumble after taking a sip of your drink, your eyes set on his formal dress uniform. It’s your first time seeing him in his dress blues… He looks nice.

The suit itself is a dark teal blue-adjacent color, and he has a ridiculous amount of medals over his left breast, which you almost mocked him for, before biting your tongue, knowing they’re important to him. 

The green beret with the Fuerzas Especiales insignia, which he wore for the better part of the day, sits on his lap. His suit jacket is unbuttoned and so are the top buttons of his white button-up, revealing his white undershirt and the gold crucifix necklace he always wears.

“And you look like you’re celebrating your quinceñera. Why would you pick such a poofy dress?” He retorts with a raised brow while leaning back on the couch and crossing his ankle over his knee. His eyes are glued to the ball gown wedding dress you’re wearing.

“I was already being forced to marry you, I was going to enjoy what little I could. I wanted to feel like a princess.” You reply and shoot him an annoyed look. Alejandro’s arm slowly slips onto the back of the couch, resting it there, behind you.

“Excuses.” He says dismissively and smirks playfully at you. “You wanted a dress that big so you’d have a built-in way of distancing yourself from me, so I didn’t have to kiss you or dance with you.” He quips and nudges you with his elbow.

You nudge him back, the two of you bickering like little kids. “Shut up!” You complain, which makes him laugh, and so do you laugh with him. “God, we had to kiss in front of everyone…” You grumble as you knock back the rest of the tequila shot.

“You say that as if I’m some sort of disgusting monster.” He retorts, causing your tongue to click in an annoyed, dismissive way. “C’mon… You didn’t hate it all that much.” He replies.

“Pelo amor de Dios [for the love of God], shut your mouth!” You demand defensively, your whole face warming up as you remember the cheers that came upon your kiss during the ceremony… and all throughout the reception to really ‘sell’ that you two are in love. “It was weird…”

Alejandro chuckles. “Not as weird as moving in together after tonight, eh?” He quips, which causes you to groan audibly. “Hey, think about it this way… Killed two birds with one stone…” He says as he scoots closer and looks you in the eyes.

“My parents stopped pestering me about getting married, your parents stopped pestering you too…” He reminds you. “Plus, now you don't have to pay rent, and we get tax benefits and better healthcare through the Army.” He adds.

“You and your stupid benefits.” You retort. “You know, we’re only in this mess because of you.” You complain and nudge him with your elbow as you look up at him.

“I know…” Alejandro grumbles and winces away from your sharp elbow to his ribs. “You’ve made a point to remind me of this every waking moment of every day since we tried to ‘break up’ and you let my mamá talk you into ‘staying with me’.” He adds and laughs a little.

Your face contorts into a grimace and you groan loudly yet again. “Your mamá has always been very demanding and scary, okay?” You retort.

“So you understand why I lied in the first place, huh?” He adds, causing you to nudge him and smack him upside the head.

“Shut up, Ale…” You retort while he chuckles a bit, rubbing the back of his head with his hand. “The woman basically begged me to stay with you because, in her eyes, if your best friend of 10 years can’t keep you tied down, then you really are a disgrace to the Vargas family.” You tell him. “What was I supposed to do?”

Instead of groaning, he simply smiles broadly and shakes his head. “Well, mi querida esposa [my dear wife], it’s over and done with. We’re married… and she’s thrilled.” He remarks and chuckles.

For some reason, you find yourself getting a bit flustered, your face flushing a bit warmer. Something about the way he called you his wife caused your heart to race… You never gave much thought to the idea of marriage… But now that you think about it… Being called someone’s wife is strangely nice. And… being Ale’s wife? It’s even nicer. 

“Don’t remind me…” You remark in an attempt to sound disdainful, but it only ends up sounding soft and gentle. “Next thing we know, she’ll be pestering us into having grandchildren… My mamá too.” You say before groaning once more.

Alejandro’s face winces a little at the idea, but then, he breaks into a grin again, seeming playful and interested. “Groan all you want… But I’m sure you’d like the process of making them.” He quips and wags his eyebrows mischievously, earning another smack upside the head from you.

“I hate you…” You tell him playfully and shake his head, annoyed and amused at him… as usual.

“No, you don’t.” Your husband says and slowly leans closer. “You love me.” He adds playfully.

“No, I’m pretty sure I hate you.” You retort as you hold your ground, remaining in the same position.

“Hm… no. You love me.” Alejandro insists and leans closer.

Your eyes sparkle a bit. “No, I don’t.” You reply while your eyes narrow at him in a mock annoyed way.

Alejandro licks his lips and slowly rubs his nose against yours. “Yes, you do. You love me… Just like you loved kissing me after the ceremony.” He quips with that shit-eating grin of his.

Something in the air makes you feel even more flustered and you look away once more. Licking your lips too, you gulp down a breath in your throat. “Maybe...” You end up admitting.

Alejandro’s smirk grows bigger. “It’s okay.” He assures you with a nod. “I didn’t mind kissing you either.” He admits, which makes your eyes widen a bit in surprise and you look back up at him.

Alejandro’s lips then brush against yours… And he presses them together into a soft, gentle kiss that, this time, doesn’t feel like a performance. It’s not a rushed little peck done only for his family, and yours, and the guests at your wedding. It’s slow and sweet, just for the two of you in this hotel room…

After a moment, Alejandro pulls away and locks eyes with you, his brown eyes softened and almost too calm… You know he’s not drunk and neither are you… And tomorrow morning, any attempts to blame this kiss on tequila are simply not going to be truthful.

You wanted to kiss each other and you did. And, in fact, you want to kiss him more.

You press your lips against his again, your hand raising to wrap around the back of his head, your fingers slipping into his black hair, tugging the strands away from their slicked-back style. His hands grab onto your waist around the bustle of your wedding dress as you both surrender to the kiss.

The moment your lips pull apart again, he leans against your ear and you hear it. “We’re going to be alright...” He murmurs reassuringly. 

You take another deep breath, allowing yourself to inhale the scent of his cologne and sweat in his body, the alcohol in his breath, and the laundry detergent in his dress blues… It’s a comforting scent. He comforts you. So you nod in agreement and Alejandro gently kisses you one more time. 

Of all people to be stuck in a sham of a marriage for both of your families’ sake… it being the man you’ve maybe harbored a crush on for a decade is not the worst of options…

End note: Although “flaca” means “skinny girl”, it has nothing to do with the reader’s actual size, most of the time. It's just a term of endearment.

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[ Amor a Alejandro Masterlist ] || [ My Masterlist ]

#ikea writes 💚 #Amor a Alejandro #alejandro vargas x reader #Alejandro Vargas #cod x reader #cod fanfic #masterlist

[crowsnqueens]

Bibliophile; Pt. ii

Kaz Brekker x Bibliophile!wife!reader

Summary: After Jesper watches a display of affection between his boss and his co-crow (hehe) he talks to Nina about it, eventually involving Inej and the heartrender in an investigation

a/n: this part of the storyline takes inspo from @undiscovered-horizon’s fic “Four Crow Investigation” which you can find here! i rlly recommend their stuff you should check them out!

Warnings: Mostly the same stuff as last time, you will need to read pt. i so go check her out first, Kaz is less angsty bc he’s married blah blah blah, (i’m just going to copy and paste the ones from pt. i tbh lmao) Kaz can tolerate reader’s touch, mentions of alcohol and drinking it, fluff for DAYS, reader uses she/her pronouns and is described as female, marriage??, the crows are about 22 in this (which is what i imagine to be in the show), OOC Kaz (i tried y’all)

Pt. i !!!

“I’m telling you, Nina! He kissed her forehead! There’s something going on here.” Jesper’s hands flailed about wildly as he expressed his concern to the girl across from him.

“I don’t doubt you, Jes. We just need to go about this carefully. Tell Inej.” The heartrender sipped her tea and waved the boy to go find their friend.

~

“Oh, I’ve known. I just can’t tell whether they’re just dating or married, it’s hard when they go about it so delicately. It’s really sweet, actually.” A soft smile lit the Suli girl’s face.

“Argh! I need to know! The anticipation is killer, I need to tell more people about this. Wylan!” The Zemini boy sauntered out of the room shouting.

“Saints, Jesper, carefully also means quietly! They’ll know we know if they hear us shouting.” Nina cautioned him.

“Who’ll know you know?” Y/n entered the kitchen gracefully and quietly. Even Inej was slightly taken aback. “What do you know that’s so secret? Can I have some of this Nina?” She gestured to the tea pot.

“Sure! And nothing too important, just the usual barrel gossip.” The Corporalnik laughed cooly as Y/n began to ascend the stairs.

“Alright. See you guys.” She giggled and waved to her three friends.

“That was too close.”

Inej and Jesper nodded together, all eyes falling on the boy.

“Stop yelling about top secret information, idiot.” Nina whispered.

~

“They know, Kaz” Y/n entered his office and sat in the chair opposite himself.

“About us together or our marriage?” He raised an eyebrow.

“Probably just us together, but I wouldn’t put it past Inej to know. We should just tell them, love.”

“How do we tell without telling?” Kaz questioned his wife as she used her best impression of his famous scheming face.

“I have an idea.” She smiled

“Do you know?” The boy smirked back at her, ready to listen.

~

“Oh, Demjin left some papers out.” Matthias walked past the kitchen table with a buttered piece of toast in hand, eyes rolling and head shaking.

“What do they say?” Jesper rushed the table with vigor and looked through some of them.

“Nina, they’re married! For three years! They’ve been wed since they were nineteen! Their marriage certificate is right here! Can you believe it?!”

“I really can’t.” Y/n’s voice carried from the bottom of the stairs to Jesper’s ears as he whipped around and pursed his lips.

“Morning, Y/n.” the boy waved a little and scrambled to the couch to attempt to disappear.

“Mrs. Brekker. Thats her official title, anyway.” Kaz waltzed in and placed a kiss to his wife’s cheek and continued to his arm chair in their living area.

Nina ran a hand over her face and gave the sharpshooter a look.

“Good going, Jes.”

The group laughed, Y/n sat on the arm of Kaz’s chair and linked their pinkies.

“Tell us everything. How did he propose?” Wylan leaned toward the two.

“Well, we were on a job…”

#kaz brekker x reader #kaz brekker #kaz x wife! reader #kazzle dazzle

[aprocessionofthoughts]

Interrogation

part 6 of ITR ao3

“Tucker, are you sure about this” Sam asked, pacing around the hotel room.

Tucker sighed, flopping back on the bed. “Sam, we already talked about this, the league won't stop looking even if we rescue Danny without them. Besides!” he said, gesturing toward the window, “We’re already in Gotham.”

“I know that!” Sam said running her fingers through her hair. “It's just that…”

“I know, Sam. I get it. But it will be better if ghost info comes from us instead of them finding out through the GIW or the Fentons. And they’ll have the resources to get the summoning ingredients faster then we could.”

Sam flopped down on the bed beside him. “For all we know they may be in support of the GIW.” Sam grumbled. 

Tucker turned toward her. “That’s why you'll be the one talking to them. You can find out what you can about what their stance is, and then we'll see what to do from there.

She sighed, “Ok. But only because we don’t have much choice.”

Tucker reached over and squeezed her hand. “We’ll get him out. Danny’s strong, he’ll be ok.”

“I hope so.” 

They laid next to each other in silence for a while until they were interrupted by a beeping coming from Tucker’s computer.

“That’ll be the motion sensors.” Tucker said getting up. I’ll be waiting in the room next door listening to make sure everything is going well.”

Sam sat up and nodded.

Tucker quickly left the room and Sam heard the neighboring room’s door open and close. Sam stood up and faced the window, scowling.

***

Tim and Bruce crouched on the building across from the room registered to Samantha Manson.

“How are we doing this, B?” Tim asked.

“You go in first, see what information you can get from her. I’ll wait here in case she tries to run or has backup.”

“I don’t think she’ll run. She came here for a reason. Not to mention her hacker friend told us who to look into.”

“Hrn.” 

“Yeah, yeah. Always good to be cautious, I know.” Tim said rolling his eyes as he lept onto the fire escape by the window. He paused as he found it unlocked. Either she didn’t know to keep her window locked in Gotham, or, more likely, they were expected. Tim braced himself as he slid the window open and slipped inside. Then he froze when he registered the person glaring at him.

“Why are you just standing there in a dark room?” Tim asked then cursed himself. That wasn’t what he planned on saying!

She lifted an eyebrow. “Why are you breaking into my room?”

Tim fought the urge to fidget. Her unimpressed eyebrow could almost rival Alfred’s. “I need to know about Daniel Nightingale.”

She snorted. “I don’t think so. Not until you give me something first.”

Bruce was silent in his ear so Tim asked, “What do you want to know?”

She stared at him for a moment, then glanced at the window. Did she know Batman was out there? Tim wouldn’t doubt it. Not if she knew as much as they thought she did.

“I want the Ant-Ecto Acts repealed.”

Tim froze. “The what?”

“I’m looking into it.” Oracle said in his ear. Bruce grunted.

Sam just glared harder at him. “Don’t mess with me. You’re a bat. You should know what they are. And if you don’t then you’re stupider than I thought and I’ll look for help elsewhere.” she said then froze.

“You need help?” Tim asked. When she didn’t say anything, he continued. “We want to rescue Daniel, but we need more information in order to find him.”

She didn’t say anything for a moment, just kept scowling. “Fine.” she stomped over the lightswitch and flipped it on. “But tell mister dark and gloomy to go ahead and come in.”

Tim was about to respond when Batman slipped in through the window.

“What do you know about Nightingale?” Bruce said, his tone not quite a growl, but not gentle either. 

Tim fought the urge to roll his eyes, that wasn’t going to work with Manson. They needed to show they were here to help, not interrogate her.

Sam didn’t even look at Bruce, “It’s a kind of bird.” she said while looking at Tim. “Just like a red robin, except nightingale isn’t also the name of a restaurant chain.”

Time fought the urge not to flush in embarrassment, even though he had heard the joke plenty of times it still never failed to get to him. Thankfully Bruce responded before Tim could think of a rebuttal.

“What are the Anti-Ecto Acts?”

Sam was glaring at Batman now and Tim could tell Bruce was glaring back.

Finally, Sam said, “They’re a set of laws that declare ghosts, and the dead adjacent as non-sentient and make it legal for people to kill and experiment on them.”

“Ghosts?” Tim asked.

Sam turned to glare at Tim, and wow, not only could she rival Alfred’s disappointed eyebrow she could also rival the batglare. 

“If you don’t believe in ghosts, then I don't think we can help each other.”

“I didn’t say that.” Tim said, raising his hands. “I was just asking for clarification. I know there are a few ghosts, but enough to warrant a whole set of laws?” Sam snorted. “Just a few? Guess the Justice League is just as blind as we thought.”

Tim ignored that for now, “But wouldn’t this law go against the meta human protection act?”

Sam rolled her eyes. “Didn’t you hear me when I said ghosts are also declared non-sentient?”

Bruce interrupted saying, “We need info on NIghtingale, if he is an associate of yours, like we’ve been led to believe, and if you want him back safe, then you need to tell us everything you know.”

She glared at him. “Don't you dare make it seem like I don’t want him back safe, but I have no reason to trust you.”

Tim stepped forward trying to diffuse the tension, Bruce had always had a hard time communicating with people who were neither victims nor delinquents. “We want to help, and we'll look into these Anti-Ecto acts, but we need to focus on finding Daniel first.”

Sam looked between them, but then responded. “Fine. I need to know exactly what happened.”

“He was helping us with a case involving cultists when the group’s leader used a red gem to control Daniel.” Tim paused as he Sam tense. She cursed and started pacing and muttering to herself. Tim only caught a bit that sounded like ‘I thought we destroyed it.’ “So, you know what it is?” he asked her.

“It’s an artifact that can control ghosts.”

“Well, yes, but why does it affect him?” 

She paused before answering, “He’s liminal.”

“What does that mean?” Bruce asked.

“It means he’s been death touched. He was dead and revived by mystical means.”

Tim thought of Jason. Was he liminal too? What about the other bats who had died and come back? But those were questions for later.

“How do we help him?” Tim asked.

“First, we need a ritual circle to bring him to us. Then we need to destroy the gem.”

Tim glanced at Bruce who gave a slight nod.

“Tell us what we need to get.”

Sam walked over to the hotel desk and picked up a piece of paper that she handed to Tim.

“Here’s everything we need. By when can you get everything?”

Tim glanced over the list. Some of the ingredients were pretty common, but there were others that he’d have to ask Constantine about. “I’ll have to ask some of your contacts about a few ingredients but it won’t take more than a few days. I’ll contact you when we have everything.”

“We’ll also look into these Anti-Ecto Acts.” Bruce said, his voice gentler. Tim wondered if he was also thinking about the possibility of some of them being liminal and falling under the parameters discussed in these acts.

Sam nodded, and Tim and Bruce slipped back outside.

Inside the hotel room, Sam closed her eyes as she waited for Tucker to join her. “Please be safe, Danny. We’re coming for you.

#danny phantom fanfiction #danny phantom #batman #bruce wayne #Tim drake #sam manson #tucker foley #dp x dc #dc x dp

[fruitsoxs]

Hello different anon here to request one of my favorite things: reverse jealousy. How would the two lads feel about the reader feeling jealous over them?

sorry this took so long to do!! I made it a bit longer to make up for it <3

pairings: vash x reader , wolfwood x reader

warnings: once again there's some angst, insecurity, self doubt, swearing, wolfwood has some feelings, reader is a bit of a dumb ass in vash's part haha

notes: i kinda went off with this?? it didn't go where I thought it would that's for sure haha.

Vash

There’s a small fire that builds up inside of you every time this person touches Vash. It’s an anger you can’t really describe. It has you feeling jittery and useless. They aren’t being forceful with him, and he seems okay with the soft touches. That just makes you more uncomfortable as you walk behind the two of them. 

They’re probably just thankful. Vash did just save their life. Anybody would be thankful if a handsome stranger ran in and ripped you away from a bunch of bandits. Especially on a planet like Gunsmoke, where everybody is only worried about themselves. There aren’t very many selfless heroes like Vash, so when they come around you tend to be thankful.

But there’s something about the way their hand lingers on his arm after they stumble closer to him. Or how they keep interrupting you, making it feel like you can’t talk. They seem to be pushing you into the background as you walk across the desert planet towards the nearest town. Despite there being enough room for you to join the two side by side, you feel like your place is behind them. 

Glaring at both of their backs with, you clench your fists lightly. The town is close enough, you can see the buildings in the distance. Soon this person will be back home, and they’ll be just a minor detail in Vash’s adventure. While you’ll be by his side, helping him the entire way. That thought should help you feel better. It should help calm your nerves.

But then, their fingers reach out towards his hand, and you feel the fire build up again. 

Jealousy rears its ugly head.

The worst part? You aren’t angry that they’re flirting with him. You’re angry that you can’t be this bold. You have been traveling with him for months now. You’ve become one of his closest friends. He trusts you. He cares for you. He has proven that he will do anything to keep you safe. And yet, you can’t even find the courage to hold his hand. This stranger, who’s known him for a few hours at most, is doing something you have always wished you could do.

RIght before their fingers touch Vash’s metal ones you clear your throat. Vash turns to you with a smile. He arches an eyebrow, probably able to read your bad mood. “You okay back there?” he asks softly. The stranger retracks their hand and looks at you too. 

“Uh yeah. I was just wondering how you ended up out here anyway.” You mumble. Embarrassed, you try to find a conversation starter that makes you look less stupid. The person shrugs and looks ahead again. “Sometimes I come out here to find spare parts. You’d be surprised how much useful junk is just laying around in the sand.” They explain looking up at Vash.

Vash nods. “Yeah that makes sense. Sorry you got caught up with those guys. They didn’t hurt you did they?” he asks, looking the person over. “Maybe a few bruises, but I’m tough. You managed to save me just in time!” They exclaim. Vash rubs the back of his neck, blushing a bit. “We couldn’t just leave you out there!”

‘I could.’ you think for a second, before guilt floods your senses. Why are you acting like this?

You pause for a second, and watch the two continue to walk. They don’t even notice that you’ve stopped walking. The stranger says something that makes Vash laugh, his cheeks turning red. They step a bit closer to Vash, and he doesn’t seem to mind. This is too much for you.

You continue walking, a few steps behind them now. Your head hands low, and your heart drops. 

As the three of you walk towards the town, the suns start to drop. The air gets a bit cooler, and the world goes eerily quiet. The town is already empty, except for a few drunken wanderers who stumble through the streets. There’s probably a bar or tavern somewhere that’s filled with idiots drinking and singing.

The stranger leads the two of you up to their doorstep. They turn around and face Vash. “This is me.” they smile softly, their eyes only on your blonde companion. “Glad you got home safe.” Vash responds, a sense of relief in his eyes. “Thanks for making sure I’m okay. I owe you.” They whisper, and you know they aren’t talking to you. “It’s really no problem. It’s what I- It’s what we do.” It’s sweet how he tries to include you even when you’re clearly not wanted.

The person smiles, and leans in close to him for a second. They pull him down to their level and press their lips against his cheep. Your blood freezes, and you look away.

“Stop by the next time you’re in town. Okay?” They mumble before leaving you and Vash standing there. Vash is a bit awestruck, his face a bright red. You feel like you might punch the next person who walks by, or break down and cry, Whatever comes first. The situation has left you completely and utterly upset. Every fiber of your being wants to run off into the night time and scream.

Instead you just stand there with your jaw clenched tightly.

“They were really nice…” Vash points out turning to you with a smile. You find yourself scoffing. “Yeah to you.” you point out and begin to walk away. Vash follows you closely, frowning. “What’s that supposed to mean?” he asks, and you feel a little bad. He looks like a little puppy who’s just been yelled at.

“I mean they clearly were happy that you specifically saved them. You know?” You mumble, a bit softer now. He stops and looks back, a bi of confusion woven into his features. “What?” he asks, looking at you again. “They liked you, Vash.”  You explain fully. His eyes widen and his cheeks turn pink again. “I-I don’t think so. I think they were just thankful I saved them-” He begins to rant, clearly flustered.

You sigh and stop to look at him. “They made it pretty obvious. I mean, they sure didn’t kiss my cheek. Did they?” He looks at you shocked, his brain jumping through hoops to try and explain the kiss. His eyebrows are furrowed as he looks down at your sour expression. 

Suddenly a small smile stretches across his lips as he steps forward. He’s put your sour mood since you saved that person together now. He knows you’re jealous. “Well, I guess I’m flattered then. But…I’ve got my eyes on someone already.” he tells you a certain look you can’t place in his eye. 

Now it’s your turn to be confused. “What? Who?” You ask, a bit too quickly. He laughs and shakes his head at you. “Someone pretty cool. They’re basically my best friends.” He explains. Your eyes widen as a new type of pain floods your senses. So he likes someone else, AND he has another best friend?

“Who is this person?” You ask, completely upset.

Vash just sighs, a small smile on his face. He walks closer and wraps his arms around you, pulling you close. His hand gently combs through your hair

Your heart is suddenly leaping within your chest. 

“It’s you.”

Wolfwood

Your finger nails dig into the soft skin on your thighs softly as you watch the scene in front of you unfold. You watch silently as Wolfwood mutters something in this random girl’s ear, making her giggle. She responds by leaning in close, giving him a shy smile. He wraps his arm around her and whispers something else- something you couldn’t hear if you tried. They’re too close now, and you feel your heart plummet into your stomach.

This shouldn’t be much of a surprise at this point. This man does this a lot. He likes to walk off the moment the group finds a place to rest, and try his luck with whoever will give him the time of day. Most of  the time his advances are accepted because, as much as you hate to admit it, Wolfwood is handsome. He’s got a nice looking face, and a well toned body. Plus he can be sickeningly charming sometimes, with his unmatched wit and cute little nicknames. Anybody would fall for him. 

Despite how common this little scene is, it still makes your chest feel tight. You’re uncomfortable, but you can’t look away. The drink you had ordered to help cool you off is left untouched, growing warmer by the second. You just don’t feel like you can stomach anything right now. You feel sick, and upset. 

You’re…well, you’re jealous.

It’s something you’ve come to terms with awhile ago. You have feelings for your weird and mysterious traveling partner. You can only share so many tender moments with him dressing your wounds (or vice versa) before affections arise. You’ve shared enough moments with him where your heart beats uncomfortably fast to understand your feelings. It sucks.

The others have left you to stew in your feelings, knowing that once you get this way there’s no pulling you out. Meryl has tried so many times to convince you to let loose and ignore Wolfwood. She’s tried telling you to go dance with a stranger, or flirt with your own handsome man. “You’re attractive.” She would say. “Anybody here would be on their knees the moment you tried talking to them.” You can’t though. Not even if you wanted to.  There’s a deep insecurity that takes over your brain every time you watch the man you love flirt aimlessly with another. It makes you doubt yourself to a degree you have never experienced. Are you not good enough? Not pretty enough? Are you boring? What is it about you that isn’t enough? These thoughts seem to flood your mind, and no amount of alcohol could subside them

Your eyes drift down to his arm resting on the girl's side, his fingers lightly pressing against her. It makes you want to vomit. You wish so desperately to be the one he touches like that, and it sickens you. How stupid are you? Pining after a man who flirts with other people so easily. This man would never give you the time of day- despite how sweet he can seem sometimes.

You grab the drink from the table and hold it to your lips, drinking it all in one go. It burns your throat. It’s not enough. Without missing a beat, another cup lands in front of you. You give a thankful nod to the bartender, then down that drink too. Your thoughts are getting clouded and fuzzy as a light buzz starts to overcome you.

You look over at Wolfwood again. This time though, your eyes meet his. He smiles when the eye contact is made. A sly smirk that makes your blood boil. It’s like he knows your feelings, and he’s rubbing it in your face. You frown and turn away. 

What an asshole.

What should you do? You clearly aren’t having fun. The alcohol isn’t helping you loosen up, it’s actually making things feel worse. That girl is pressed up against Wolfwood, and you’re sure you might throw up or cry if you continue watching. Maybe you should leave. Go find a quiet place to relax? Yeah that’s a good idea. You leave your payment for the drinks on the counter and walk out of the building, into the chilly night air. For how hot it normally is on this harsh planet, the nights can get deadly cold. 

You lean against the railing and sigh softly. It’s just not your night.

The sound of a door opening and closing brings you out of your little moment of peace, and the familiar smell of cigarettes makes your nose wrinkle. Wolfwood walks up next to you, flicking his lighter. He rests his elbows against the railing and leans forward.

“Why’d you run off?” He asks after a couple minutes of silence. 

You look at him through the side of your eye for a moment, taking in his features. He looks so soft in the moonlight. Far different right now than how he always seems. A hint of warmth under the cold exterior he seems to always parade around. A side of him that he only lets you see.

“Needed some fresh air.” You finally answer, looking away. He’s really the last person you want to see right now. “Aren’t you missing somebody?” You ask, the alcohol makes you bolder than normal. There’s a sense of anger in your voice you can’t hide.

“You mean that girl?” He asks his hand going to his chin as if he’s thinking. “Just wasn’t feeling it. Why?” That sly smirk is back. “You feeling a little jealous?” His voice is quiet. He’s not looking at you, not entirely. He sometimes flickers his eye over to you, probably to see how you react.

Your eyes snap up to him, and a new anger surges through you. You can’t believe this man! He’s such a…a.. “You’re an asshole.” You say out loud, turning to look at him. Tears threaten to fall from the corners of your eyes.

“Is that a yes?” He goes to tease you, but when he turns to face you he stops dead in his tracks. His eyes meet with yours. His smile drops and a myriad of emotions go through his eyes. Confusion, surprise, then worry. He turns his body to you, and lets the bud of his cigarette fall to the ground. You remain tense, and quiet. You find yourself unable to meet his gaze.

“Oh.”

That’s all he says for a while. It seems he understands your feelings now. His hands clench and unclench, as he looks away. There’s a silence that takes over now. It’s awkward and tense. 

You grow tired of the moment, and let out a soft sigh. You knew he’d react like this. You knew there was no way he’d feel the same way. It’s still heartbreaking though. Your stomach is in ruins, and it feels like all of the air has been sucked out of you. Curse whatever created you for making you feel so utterly helpless in this situation.

You turn to leave, but his hand finds your wrist and he pulls you back. “Don’t- Just give me a second.” He sighs, and his hand slips away. You stay put, despite the fact you desperately want to escape. He pulls out another cigarette and holds the lighter up to his lips, lighting it. The glow shows off his conflicted eyes.

He takes a deep breath, and then lets it go.

“You’re too good for me.” He says finally. “I”m…not  the type of guy you should fall in love with.” His words are filled with an emotion you’ve never heard from him. This is a new Wolfwood. “I’ve done stuff…” he cuts himself off and looks in the opposite direction of you. “Sweetheart I…I…” he’s struggling to find the words. He takes a deep breath and then-

“Fuck it.”

He whips around. He grabs the cigarette from his lips with one hand, and the other clutches onto the back of your head. It happens too fast for you to understand completely , but he pulls you close and his lips catch yours. It’s a soft kiss. 

He pulls away and leaves you breathless, your heart pounding in your chest. His hand is still cradling the back of your head. He stares down at you, his dark eyes trying to convey to you what he’s struggling to say out loud. He loves you too.

#wolfwood x reader #nicholas d wolfwood x reader #vash x reader #vash the stampede x reader #wolfwood drabble #vash drabble #request #no beta

[goldenhypen]

❝ THE PARTNER PROJECT ❞ — JAKE SIM

PAIRING → jake sim x fem!reader || GENRE → friends to lovers!au, non-idol!au, dancer!au, fluff, angst || WORD COUNT → 8.6k

FEATURING → tomorrow x together’s yeonjun; le sserafim’s chaewon and yunjin; nmixx’s lily; ive’s wonyoung and liz; and newjeans’ danielle || WARNINGS → mentions of food, contains an argument or two between jake and reader (lmk if i’m missing any!)

SYNOPSIS → being part of the same dance team for two years and counting, jake and y/n have never found the courage to confess to each other about their feelings, until one day, they are forced to grow closer as they just so happen to get paired for the first time as the team prepares for a new performance. and luckily for the both of them, they’ll be partners for the entire season. and who knows? this particular partnership might just evolve and grow into one that will last them a lifetime.

AUTHOR’S NOTE → after putting together jake’s birthday fic extremely last minute (heh ,, procrastinator things <//3), it is finally here !! this is my first time writing such a long fic, but i honestly enjoyed it sm, and it makes me wanna write more of them in the future !! happy birthday to jakey, and i hope you all enjoy this one !! <3

“jake totally has a crush on you.”

“chaewon!” you whisper-yelled with wide eyes, “be quiet!”

you and your close friends and fellow dance members, chaewon and yunjin, had stepped into the empty dance studio where you would soon be having practice with the rest of the team who would be arriving just any minute. this team included you, chaewon and yunjin, along with four other girls, called lily, wonyoung, liz and danielle. 

in addition to all of you though, there were also seven other guys, one of them being the one and only, jake sim, whom you’ve had a secret crush on for what felt like forever, but was really only for nearly two years. however, this was more or less only a secret kept from the guys, because you seven girls tended to hang out and talk about lots of things, a common subject being crushes since you were all dreadfully single. and so, you were very open about your crush on jake to them, but never would you let that kind of confidential information reach even a mile within the boys’ ears, because who knows how that news would spread? rumours could start, information could reach so many in such a short amount of time, and you could experience heartbreak and rejection before you could even let jake know about your feelings yourself. 

now, it was no doubt that you seven were close with the boys; however, what’s said between the girls stays between the girls. it’s an unspoken rule. 

however, today seemed to be the first day of potentially failing this prioritised goal of yours because of chaewon’s slip of the tongue. you just hoped none of the guys were within hearing distance of the spilled secret. 

“he does not!” you continued in a soft yet demanding tone. 

“y/n, i’m serious,” yunjin responded. “based on my intuition, i give you a solid 90-percent chance that he actually likes you too. and you know my success rate for these things is high, such as the wonyoung-sunghoon confirmation incident last week!”

“yeah, yeah, i get it,” you playfully rolled your eyes, “but seriously, there’s no proof that tells me that he actually does like me back. plus, what is there to like about me anyway?”

you looked down, slightly sad, distracting yourself with the sweater paws of your crewneck. 

“y/n, stop,” chaewon frowned, placing a hand on your arm, “you’re talented and pretty and caring and kind and so many more beautiful things. jake definitely has good taste.”

she ended her point with a smirk, and you finally looked up at her and couldn’t help the smile rising to your lips before smacking her arm. 

“don’t get my hopes up.”

after around five minutes, everyone finally arrived in the studio, along with your senior and dance coach, choi yeonjun, and you were finally able to catch a break from your friends about all of the jake nonsense. however, whether they were temporarily finished with their attempts to convince you of their strong senses or not, it didn’t matter, because the thumping inside your chest wouldn’t slow down for even two seconds as you watched the man in question step into the room. 

he was glowing—you could’ve sworn he was—with that beaming smile of his that was always on his face whenever he hung out with the boys. 

oh, how nice it would be to be one of the guys right now. 

his wide grin that pushed his cheekbones up, crinkling his eyes into shapes that screamed joy were so contagious, it had you smiling as well, but you used everything you had inside you to shove it away so that it wasn’t obvious you were staring—oh, right, but you were forgetting the most crucial part of that whole plan: looking away. so immediately and unfortunately, you drew your eyes away from the gorgeous man that you could so easily stare at for hours and hid your smile away that so wanted to be let out. but staring at jake was not worth the risk of letting him know your true feelings for him. 

“okay, everyone, listen here, please!” yeonjun started loudly. “i have important and exciting news.” 

the sounds of chatter died down as all of you gathered around, eager to listen to what your senior had to say. 

“during today’s practice, we’re going to start on a new performance…”

everyone gasped and smiles lit up the room, followed by a few whispered exchanges. 

“…i want us to do something that we don’t do too often, and that is dancing with partners, meaning every guy and girl have to partner up with each other...”

mixed emotions filled the room, and a different expression could be seen on every face as you scanned the people around you—some shocked, some excited, some nervous.

“…this will be a different style than what we’re used to, but i think it’ll be fun. and i’ve been working on the choreography and formations for this dance all week, but i still haven’t picked the partners for it.”

“or—!” danielle raised her hand and began excitedly, “maybe we can pick the partners since you’ve done a lot already, coach. doing this, you can have a little bit of a break.”

yeonjun thought for a moment, hesitant, “i don’t usually let you pick your own partners for several reasons, but i suppose this time wouldn’t be such a bad idea to. go ahead; we’ve been dancing together long enough, i trust you guys.”

danielle, as well as many others’ eyes, lit up at the unexpected decision made. 

“okay, while i just get some stuff ready for us to start, you all go and begin picking your partners,” yeonjun said. “i’ll give you three minutes, and then we can start.” 

and after three minutes, yeonjun was ready, and so were the fourteen of you with your partners chosen. 

somehow, from some blessing or some curse—you didn’t know—jake ended up as your partner, and you couldn’t have been more shaken up. 

having been a team for a while now, it was a habit for you all to work on coming to a decision together, so that’s exactly what you did, somewhat huddling up as partners were being chosen. 

“i think me and sunoo have similar styles, so we can go together,” liz suggested, followed by several agreeing nods. 

“and we all know i don’t pick up choreo the fastest,” danielle blurted out lightheartedly, laughing as she continued, “so maybe i should go with ni-ki so we can balance each other out.”

and yunjin just had to go on and say, “and i think jake and y/n dance well together, but we don’t get to see you two dance side by side very often. it would be nice to see you as partners this time.”

you narrowed your eyes at her in a death stare that was as subtle as possible, but she only gave you a smirk with a playful look of pride in her eyes, happy with her suggestion as the rest of the group agreed. 

and that was how you ended up by jake’s side—as his dance partner for this season. 

you didn’t know if your heart was beating and unsteady hands shaking because of how nervous or how excited you were to be paired with him. but you concluded that though you had known him and danced in the same team with him for two years now, at this moment, you were so anxious to make the smallest slip-up and wanted to do your best at looking good in front of him. 

so yes, you were extraordinarily nervous, to say the least, and your body couldn’t be tenser with these uncontrollable nerves and feelings locked up inside of you.

and this really didn’t help your case as jake suddenly, yet so delicately and softly, placed his hands on your waist from behind, catching you so off guard that you jumped slightly under his touch. you two both laughed it off, but instead of feeling relieved of anything, your awkward laughs just made you feel more embarrassed. 

that was when you snapped back to reality and realised yeonjun was already teaching the choreography. 

why would you jump when he’s touching you?! it was literally instructed, right before your own eyes? you scolded yourself internally, taking a deep breath in an attempt to calm yourself down, even if just slightly. 

“sorry,” you felt jake whisper beside your ear from behind. felt, because not only did you hear him, but shivers also rushed down your entire being as jake’s breath brushed against the shell of your ear, and you hoped for the life of you that he wouldn’t get too close to hear your rapid heartbeat himself. 

you shook your head, looking into his eyes through the mirror that you stood before, and smiled naturally in response to his apology, letting him know it was okay. 

and for the next few hours, practice continued just like that—learning the dance with a few awkward moments shared between you and jake every so often. 

being paired with your crush, you would have expected time to pass by more quickly, because ‘time flies when you’re having fun,’ but no. time slowed extremely, because you were so nervous. 

you had danced with jake before—of course; you were a part of the same dance team for two years and counting—and you had even been partnered with him before; however, you had never had him to yourself, and also never for an entire dance. and with your feelings only growing every day, of course, you were nervous about this project. 

being so focused on your own feelings and also trying to pick up the choreography quickly without mistakes, you didn’t fully notice that jake was also struggling because he had similar feelings as you, since he liked you too—a lot. 

his feelings for you began the moment he walked into the studio on his first day of joining the team. your smile was radiant as you talked and laughed with your friends in the middle of the practice room, and he immediately fell for you. 

ever since, he had gotten to know you better, and he absolutely fell in love with your personality: how you were so kind and how you had your own quirks. 

throughout these two years, you two found it difficult to interact, both being shy when it came to talking to each other privately, one-on-one. of course, you two were friendly with one another, but neither of you ever made much of an extensive effort to take your friendship any further. 

even though there were countless nights where he would imagine what it would be like to have you as his girlfriend and to take you on all of these dates, such as going to an amusement park or arcade or even watching the stars together, he still didn’t dare to ever ask you out. 

so, yes, you both were struggling to say the least, and yeonjun noticed this and decided to confront you two about it. 

“what’s going on?” he asked you both seriously and slightly frustrated. “if you guys can’t work together, i’m going to have to choose new partners. you all chose these pairs, and if you can’t show me that you can be responsible and work together well, i can’t let you guys choose your partners again in the future.”

“sorry, coach,” you apologised, guilt laced in your voice as you couldn’t even look into his eyes. “there’s no need to change partners. don’t worry about us; we’ll work hard and make sure we don't fall behind.”

yeonjun, sceptical, looked at you and jake, who nodded along to everything you had to say, “there are only ten minutes left of practice, but i want you two to stay behind until you’re able to dance this piece as well as everybody else.”

“yes, coach,” jake said with a nod. 

yeonjun then looked at you before you shook your head up and down quickly in understanding. 

“okay,” yeonjun started assertively to grab everyone’s attention, “let’s end practice here. a reminder that we have the retreat tomorrow, and we have to meet here at 10 am. jake and y/n, please clean up the studio when you’re done. i’ll see you all tomorrow.”

and with that, everybody began packing up, and within minutes, with a final good luck and goodbye wave from your friends, your coach and all of your dance mates were gone, leaving just you and jake, alone in the empty studio. 

“well, i guess it’s just us,” jake began, breaking the silence as he sent you the softest smile, reminding you of how much your heart ached for him. 

“yeah,” you agreed, continuing under your breath, “just us.”

“should we go over the dance?” he asked.

“yeah. actually, can we go over that one part that we were having trouble with? the one that’s like—” you demonstrated the move by lifting your arms and placing them in position.

“there were actually a lot of parts we were having trouble with,” he said with a chuckle—oh, how you loved his laugh, “but yeah, we can start with that one.”

as he finished his words, he made his way, stopping in front of you before placing his hands on your hips. and it was only then that you remembered what kind of partner work this part included; if you hadn’t forgotten earlier, you wouldn’t have asked to go over this part first, then you wouldn’t have to start with cleaning the dance flustered. 

heat rose to your cheeks, and your arms slowly made their way around his neck, preparing for the following moves. 

“ready?” he counted, “five, six, seven, eight—”

and after an hour of additional practice, you both agreed that you were ready for next practice, but also ready to eat, because your stomachs had been in need of some food a long time ago.

“how about let’s just run it through with music one more time, yeah? and then let’s get something to eat; i’m so hungry,” jake suggested, and you nodded before he went to play the song.

you got in your starting position, and jake ran to his spot beside you, holding your hand like the routine began.

you couldn’t keep track of how many times you had run this routine with jake today, but the more you did it, the more comfortable both of you noticeably felt. you were both less tense and having fun as you danced through it, and whenever you would make eye contact, large, happy grins would be exchanged. 

the song finally began to conclude, and you both made your way to your ending position, your body in his arms, faces close as you held the ending pose. and as the music came to an end, you two stayed there for a few more counts, and during that time, you could’ve sworn his eyes rushed down to your lips for a split second. 

or maybe not. 

either way, you decided to just brush it off and not think about it too much or else you’d potentially be getting your hopes up for nothing. 

you two stood back up, and joyful laughter escaped your lips before some celebratory high-fives were exchanged. 

“we did it!” you exclaimed. 

“yes! good job!”

“you too,” you smiled softly, looking into each other’s eyes for one long second before you snapped yourself back to reality. “now let’s get some food; i’m starving.”

so you two quickly cleaned the practice room and packed up before excitedly leaving the studio to go get something to eat together. 

you two ended up deciding on a place after jake had recommended it to you and encouraged you two to go, and of course, you couldn’t help but give in to his adorable proposal. 

so he took you to a nice, middle-class-type restaurant, and once you two sat down, he had a wide grin on his face as he suggested you try the steak, which is what he usually ordered and what he was planning to order again this time. 

so with a soft smile, you agreed, and he ended up ordering for the both of you.

after having practised together for almost the entire day, you two had grown closer, and conversation came easily and naturally, which both of you were grateful for. 

“you know,” jake started, eyes on his straw as he swirled it slowly in his cup in front of him, “we’ve danced together for so long, why is it only now that we’re actually partnered with each other?”

“i know, right? i was thinking the same thing.”

“yeah,” he nodded before letting his straw go and moving his eyes to look into yours. “i’m really glad we’re partners this time.”

at his genuine words, the look on your face visibly softened, and you paused for a moment, collecting yourself internally, “me too, jake. you’re actually not as bad a partner as lily says you are.”

at your playful remark, jake’s jaw lowered in a look of feigned offence, “wow, is that really the way my image is perceived among the girls?” 

“yup,” you nodded slowly, lips pressed together as you let out a joking sigh. 

and jake just looked at you and laughed, loving that he got to experience this side of you, with no others around. just you two.

eventually, after the food arrived and jake offered to cut your steak for you like the gentleman he was, and after you both finished eating, after all of the laughs shared, after he ended up sneaking his way through and somehow paying for the entire bill, and after you smacked him on the shoulder and playfully scolding him for doing so, he ended up driving you home, as though he didn’t already do enough for you the entire day.

“thanks for the ride, jake,” you said as he parked, dropping you off.

“no problem. today was a lot of fun, we should do this kind of thing more often.”

“we should,” you said, unable to contain your smile, and neither was he.

“go inside now. i need to make sure you get in safe,” he told you.

“thanks, jake. see you tomorrow.”

“see you tomorrow.”

savouring the last moment you had with him for the day, you eventually pulled yourself to get out of his car and make your way to your door. 

heading inside, you gave him one last wave and watched as he began driving away. 

and once he was out of reach, you squealed to yourself and ran giddily to your room. boy, were you going to have a good sleep tonight. 

⎯⎯⎯⎯ ❦ ⎯⎯⎯⎯

“…yunjin, check. jay, check. heeseung, check. y/n, check. and danielle, check. okay! we can all make our way to the bus now; we’re all here,” yeonjun told all of you. 

it was retreat day one of two, and you couldn’t be more excited. this was an opportunity for bonding and growing closer to the members of your team, meaning, maybe you could get some more one-on-one time with jake too. 

following yeonjun, you began making your way outside and into the bus that was ready to take everyone. 

boarding, there were multiple rows of four seats down the entire interior of the bus, but in every row, the seats were separated in the middle by an aisle, leaving two seats on either side. 

taking note of this, you noticed all of your friends sat down with each other, in pairs, in the same rows. you girls did have an odd number after all. so you ended up sitting alone, which you didn’t really mind anyways. 

as the boys began trailing in afterwards, you noticed jake was the first one to come in and you smiled to yourself. he looked so happy and handsome, as always. 

what you didn’t expect was the following question from him, and you didn’t expect him to ask you out of everyone here: “can i sit here?”

“yeah, of course!” you answered, simply smiling on the outside but absolutely beaming on the inside with ecstasy as he took the seat right beside you. 

⎯⎯⎯⎯ ❦ ⎯⎯⎯⎯

what were five hours of road-tripping felt like a duration that just wasn’t long enough. 

though you were forced to stay seated in the same spot and same position for such a great amount of time, somehow, sitting with him had the hours pass like they were nothing. 

you two were able to talk for hours without growing bored, and if the conversation ever died down, the silence was never awkward. just simply being in each other’s presence was enough for both of you. 

jake noticed as your eyelids began to grow heavy, “you tired?”

“yeah, a little,” you answered, followed by a slight chuckle. 

“here,” he said, patting his shoulder, telling you to rest your head on him. 

you smiled, grateful, and made yourself comfortable. 

as you did so, jake’s heart rate quickened, yet also grew extremely soft, seeing you resting on him. he adored you. 

once your team arrived at the retreat destination, jake woke you up gently, and eventually, you all exited the bus, jake letting you go first, making you smile at the reminder of how much of a gentleman he was. 

you thanked him and got off the bus. 

“okay, everyone, go drop your things off in your rooms, and we’ll meet in the cafeteria in fifteen minutes for dinner,” yeonjun announced after a briefing once everyone was out of the large vehicle. “what are you waiting for? go, go! i’ll see you all in fifteen.”

you all laughed before everyone made their way to their rooms. 

some time had passed, and after relaxing and unpacking for a few minutes, it was finally dinner time. 

excited, you entered the cafeteria with wonyoung and liz, only to be met with the sight of jake already sitting with others. 

you hadn’t planned with him to sit together, but after everything that happened over the past couple of days, you just naturally expected it. 

perhaps he had been sitting with you long enough already for one day that he got bored and needed a break. maybe that’s why he was sitting with jay and sunghoon—and lily. except jay and sunghoon were only talking to each other, leaving jake and lily who seemed to be having lots of fun conversing and joking with one another, just as you were beginning to get your hopes up that maybe he liked you back. but no, he was just a nice, friendly guy, not just to you, but to everyone. 

the night continued, and you ended up sitting and eating dinner with chaewon, liz and jungwon when all of a sudden, riki started going around to every table, attempting to convince everyone to place 7 minutes in heaven. 

it was a stupid idea, almost everybody thought so, but he was the youngest on your team, and a clever one at that, that somehow he convinced you all in to playing. you don’t even remember how he managed to pull you into doing it, yet here you were, sitting in a large circle in sunoo and riki’s shared room, along with everyone else, about to spin a bottle to decide which two of you would go into the closet first. 

you all were hopelessly single anyways, so why not just give it a go? 

looking around you, a minority was excited while the rest of you looked slightly uneasy about playing the game, but before you could think too much into it, riki rubbed his hands together with a smirk on his face, “ready?”

and with that, he spun the bottle. 

you all watched anxiously as the bottle circled, and circled, and circled. it almost looked like it wasn’t slowing down at all, but eventually, after a few seconds, it slowly came to a complete stop, and you all watched, anticipating who it would land on. 

sunghoon. 

shock was the most common expression painted on people’s faces, while some of the boys began cheering the boy on. eventually, though, the bottle was spun again, and you all watched closely to see who sunghoon’s match in heaven would be…

jang wonyoung. 

your jaw dropped, and you all looked at each other and at the two chosen ones before you exchanged eye contact with yunjin who gave you a smirk, remembering that she did predict correctly the fact that they both liked each other. however, neither of the two knew of the other’s feelings, which made this match all the more exciting. 

with sunghoon getting up first to lead the way, they both entered the closet, and riki locked them in from the outside. 

the rest of you looked at each other and began talking and predicting the things they were doing in there. 

“well, let’s hope sunghoon finally makes a move this time,” jay whisper yelled to the group. 

eventually, seven minutes were up, and you could imagine sunghoon and wonyoung’s shared frightened reaction when riki violently knocked on the closet door to inform the two that their time was over. 

the two could have been kissing for all you know and suddenly one could have bit the other’s lip as a reaction to the sudden noisy interruption, but you chose to hope otherwise. 

the two later came out, cheeks a dark, rosy pink that made you excited for them. you hoped everything went well during those seven minutes. 

you chose to take seeing everyone’s lips intact as a good sign. 

as the two joined the circle again, everyone began bombarding them with questions that you all forgot there were more rounds to go before the sound of riki exaggerating the clearing of his throat overtook your chatter. 

“we will now begin the next round,” riki said in a loud, deep voice, laced with some sort of fancy accent to add to the act he was trying to play which had you all chuckling softly. 

everyone’s eyes were on riki’s hand as he grabbed ahold of the bottle in the middle of the circle and quickly spun it. 

and you all watched as the bottle landed on you. 

your eyes went wide, and you felt a wave of nervousness crash to the pit of your stomach. 

you didn’t expect to be chosen, at least not near the beginning, considering the chances since there were fourteen of you—fifteen if you include yeonjun, the spectator who got to be entertained by the drama without having to participate in it. perks of being a senior to a group of drama-prone teens. 

you were shocked and more nervous than excited since, really, there was only one boy you’d want to be stuck in a closet with, and the chances of the bottle landing on him next weren’t exactly very high. however, even if it did land on him, it wouldn’t make you any less anxious. in fact, it would probably make the feeling worse, if anything. 

so you all watched as riki spun the bottle again to choose your match. 

you and chaewon grasped so tightly onto each other’s arms that you wouldn’t have been surprised if you cut each other’s circulation off in anticipation. 

it felt like an eternity watching as the bottle spun. you just needed to know immediately who you’d be going into that closet with for the next seven minutes. 

finally, the spinning of the bottle seemed to slow, and your eyes followed it anxiously, and eventually, it landed. 

your brain was trying to process the situation that you subconsciously blocked out the sound of everyone’s gasps. 

you looked into jake’s eyes, directed down towards the floor, to try and find a reaction or get a grasp of what his expression reflected about how he was possibly feeling. but it was of no use; he was unreadable. 

the bottle had landed on jungwon. 

besides chaewon and yunjin, jungwon was the member you were closest to. you two had known each other the longest of anyone on the team, having been on the team the longest. and not to mention, he was a former crush of yours from many years back. 

before you knew any of the people who were currently sitting in this circle, you liked jungwon. and even though it had been years since you did, and thinking those feelings subsided a long time ago, somehow, you felt an unexpected, subtle excitement as you realised that at this moment, those feelings from the past were beginning to resurface. 

but you took a deep breath in and reminded yourself to stay strong as you stood up and made your way with jungwon to the closet. 

he walked in first, and you followed. 

“good luck, love birds,” you heard riki blurt out before shutting the door and locking it. 

jungwon rolled his eyes at the boy playfully and you shook your head as you then turned to face him. 

“hi,” you let out softly with a small smile. 

“hey,” he returned, a slight grin painting his adorable features. 

“wow,” you started. “coming to this retreat, i definitely didn’t expect i’d be in this situation, especially with you of all people.”

“i know,” he chuckled. “riki’s such a kid. but honestly, i think everyone’s low-key enjoying playing this game.”

“just wait ‘til it’s their turn though,” you said, causing both of you to laugh as jungwon nodded in agreement. 

“are you enjoying the game?” he suddenly posed. 

your eyes subconsciously snapped to his and you felt

your cheeks begin to heat up slightly at the question. luckily, the light in the closet was barely existent. 

“i mean, yeah,” you said. “it's only the second round, and me and you only just got in here. and at the end of the last round, we didn't even get to discuss how wonyoung and sunghoon’s turn went. i’m actually dying to know what happened!”

“same,” jungwon said. “those two better have kissed or something. it's painful watching them be so oblivious to each other’s feelings.”

you laughed, “i know, right? anyways, how about you? how are you liking this game?”

“yeah, like what you said, the game only really just started, and to be honest, i’m glad you’re the one i’m in here with. we’ve known each other for so long, y’know?”

“yeah, totally.”

“y’know, i guess, y/n, i’m probably only going to get this opportunity once, and so i might as well say it now—” with jungwon’s words, your heart began increasing in speed, feeling as though with every pump, it was rising, closer and closer to your throat that with each breath, it became harder to breathe in anticipation for what he was about to say, and you were quite sure of what his next words were going to be, “—i like you, y/n.”

there they were.

a feeling overcame your body with those four words that you had never experienced before. it was as though time had slowed, and you could barely think straight, a sudden mix of nervousness and excitement that wasn’t there before becoming apparent. 

“you don't have to like me back or anything, or even say anything for that matter,” jungwon told you. “whatever you do, i won’t be mad at it. i just thought i should let you know, because it’s been a long time since i’ve felt this and wanted to tell you, and since we’re in private, i figured this was a good opportunity to do so.”

his eyes dropped from yours, and you stared at him, wondering how such a kind, respectful and brave boy could exist in this corrupt world. and he had been in front of you this entire time. 

your heart was pounding, and riding the high you currently felt from the sudden boost of confidence his confession gave you, you gathered the courage to say, “jungwon, you can kiss me if you want.”

his eyes travelled back up to your own, giving you an almost confused expression that quickly lit up into a smile of relief and happiness. 

he took a step closer to you, and with that, his hand came to gently cup the side of your face. he gave you the softest look as his eyes travelled down to your lips, and you watched as he leaned in before you closed your eyes and met him in the middle. 

the kiss was nothing short of incredible. his lips were soft and moulded against yours almost perfectly. 

after a few seconds when he pulled away, if you were being honest, you almost wanted more, but it was for the best that you just let it be, and you smiled to yourself at what had just happened between the two of you. 

“th—“

“okay, lovebirds, time’s up,” riki announced, bursting open the door, causing you and jungwon to both jump slightly at the sudden interruption. 

as riki made way for you two to exit, jungwon looked at you one more time before gesturing for you to head out first, so you did, and once you made your way to the rest of the group, still sitting in a circle around the bottle on the floor, you watched as your friends eyed you with confused expressions, as though they were unsure whether to congratulate you or scold you. but how would they know what happened in the closet? 

yunjin cleared her throat awkwardly and began speaking, “you two know that the walls are really thin here and we can hear lots of what you were saying in that closet?”

“what?!” you blurted out, eyes wide in shock. 

“yeah,” riki added, “it was hard to notice when sunghoon and wonyoung were inside because we were all talking during their turn. but you guys started talking right away, and we noticed, and we couldn’t pass down the opportunity for good tea.”

“i—“ jungwon let out, eyes furrowed in slight worry and disappointment. 

you then looked to jake beside him and noticed how his expression seemed to be even sadder than jungwon’s, which confused you. 

“anyways, it’s okay, guys. we’re like family anyways. the secrets are bound to come out at some point,” riki brushed off. 

“family?” liz questioned, a slight tone of disgust in her voice, “you can’t say we’re like family and then proceed to spin the bottle—“

“watch me,” riki challenged with a smirk as he grabbed hold of the bottle and spun it yet again. 

liz rolled her eyes before watching the bottle along with everybody else when it slowly landed on jake. 

you looked at him immediately after a soft gasp left your lips, and his expression remained the same as the last time you checked: disappointed and sad. it brought a frown to your face. 

as riki held the bottle in his hands again, preparing to let it loose, you were reminded that someone would have to go with jake, and the thought of anybody else going into that closet with him alone built up an indescribable jealousy within you. it was lame and unfair of you to feel that way, but—you. you looked down. 

the bottle had landed on you. 

you stared at it, giving you a clear confirmation that you were indeed seeing it correctly and your brain wasn’t making things up in attempts to soothe your envy. 

you blinked a few times before looking up and meeting eyes with jake—and then to everybody else. 

“y/n again?!” sunghoon exclaimed. 

“should we spin it again? y/n already went,” riki pointed out. 

“no, no, let her go again. it’s getting exciting,” you heard your senior cut in from a few metres away, causing you all to laugh—all but you and jake. 

you looked at him again, swallowing nervously before he stood up, “let’s go.”

walking into the closet with jake, the air had never felt so thick with tension. 

“you kissed him, right?” jake asked you once riki locked the door, sitting on the floor with his back against the wall to which you did the same, making sure to keep some distance between the two of you. 

“was it that obvious?” you asked sadly. 

“we basically heard the entire thing,” he explained to you. “i didn’t want to, and i tried to convince the rest of them, but they all shut me up and didn’t bother listening to me; they just wanted to listen in on you and jungwon.”

“well, thanks, i guess,” you said. 

there was a long moment of silence, more tension filling the small closet, before jake broke it, voice cracking with hurt as he asked, “why did you kiss him?”

you snapped your head to face him, confused, “what?”

“why?” jake repeated, “tell me, why did you kiss him?”

“i—“ you paused, shocked, “jake, this is 7 minutes in heaven you're talking about. that’s the purpose of the game!”

even you were taken aback by how loud your voice got towards the end of your point. 

“you didn’t have to kiss him. you know that,” he said, voice growing angrier with each word that left his lips. 

“jake—“

“and most of all, you didn’t have to be the one to initiate it,” he finished, voice breaking down painfully. 

more silence. 

“why are you so upset about me kissing jungwon?” you asked, frustrated. “it was just a kiss!”

“it wasn’t just a kiss—“

“but why does that matter?!”

jake paused for a moment, taking a deep breath in before answering. 

“i thought we—“ he said, gesturing between you and him, “—were—i don’t even know, y/n, but all i know is that i feel like i was being led on.”

you scoffed, “‘led on?’ you feel led on?”

jake eyed you, confused. 

“what about me? you have been talking to lily all day ever since we got off that bus, and you’re so friendly with literally every girl—if anything, i should be the one to feel led on!”

“really?” jake asked, upset and offended. “do you even hear yourself right now? i was talking to lily. it’s a part of my personality to be friendly with people! meanwhile, you're over here kissing other boys! how does that sound for being led on? hm?”

“why does it matter, jake?” you asked, rolling your eyes. “it was just a kiss, and it’s not like you and i are a couple! you don’t own me.”

he scoffed and rolled his eyes, shaking his head as he began standing up, “whatever, y/n.”

“okay! time’s up, love bi—“ riki didn’t end that sentence, because immediately after he opened the closet door, jake shoved his way through, leaving not only the closet but the entire room and building too. 

you slowly walked out of the closet, being met with everyone no longer sitting in a circle and making themselves occupied with anything they could find if it meant avoiding your eyes. 

“where did jake go?” you asked, voice slow and sad. 

heeseung pointed to the door of the room, letting you know that he left. 

⎯⎯⎯⎯ ❦ ⎯⎯⎯⎯

the next day was the last of the retreat, and you were mentally and emotionally ready to go home. 

and after a whole morning and half of an afternoon of training, lectures and team-building games, it was time to go home. 

you all packed your things and got ready outside to board the bus as yeonjun began taking a headcount. 

“okay, we’re ready to go.”

climbing onto the bus, you noticed jake had taken a seat beside the window, but to the spot beside him, you noticed was his backpack. 

he probably wants to sit alone. 

so jake watched as you walked past him, sitting farther down in the bus with wonyoung instead. and if he was being honest, he was disappointed. 

he wished that you two hadn’t argued and that things would return to the way they were when you were on the first bus, heading to the retreat the day earlier. 

he wished that instead of jungwon, he himself would have been the one to be inside that closet with you first. 

he wished that he could have kissed you in that closet when he had the chance. 

but instead, you two only fought, and now, whatever relationship you two had before was broken. 

⎯⎯⎯⎯ ❦ ⎯⎯⎯⎯

that evening, a couple of hours after arriving back home, your team had practice, and one by one, everybody slowly and tiredly arrived at the studio—all except jake. 

“jake told me he isn’t feeling well tonight, so he’s going to be staying home,” yeonjun informed all of you. “but it’s okay; we can make do without one member for today. i appreciate the rest of you coming after an exhausting retreat. shall we get started then?”

throughout practice, you were unable to keep up with the rest of your team because jake wasn’t there. yes, he was your partner, but the studio also lacked his important presence. 

like riki had said the day before, you all really were like family, and without one person, it was like a puzzle piece was missing from the entire picture. 

the fact that you and him also left it on bad terms had you feeling uneasy the entire practice, and even though you were still upset with him, you also hoped he was doing okay, especially knowing you were the one who caused his pain and absence. 

eventually, practice ended, and trudging yourselves out of the studio, tired, you all got to go and finally get some rest. 

arriving home, after washing up, your body felt a sense of relief as it hit the comfort of your mattress; however, your mind was still not at ease as thoughts of jake and what had happened the day before, along with the repercussions of it all, lingered in your head, making you unable to fall asleep. 

bringing yourself back to the argument, your heart began racing with frustration and restlessness—you just wished none of it had ever happened and that jake was okay right now… and speaking of the boy, you wondered what he was up to. 

somehow unable to combat your curiosity, the next thing you knew, your phone was in your hands, the screen being one of the only things lighting up the darkness of your room. 

your fingers typed faster than your brain it seemed, and suddenly, you clicked the send button for a message now delivered to jake, asking what he was doing right now and if he was doing okay.

immediately after sending it, you turned your phone off, set it down, and closed your eyes, trying to block out your thoughts so that you could get some peace and quiet to allow you to fall asleep. 

however, you were very unsuccessful, and your mind began racing, coming up with possibilities of how he would answer and what his thoughts would be when he read the message from you. and suddenly, a deep feeling of regret dropped to the bottom of your chest. 

you quickly checked your phone for any reply. 

and, nothing. 

you curled your body into the foetal position, groaning as you banged your fist onto your mattress in regret. 

you checked your phone again. 

still nothing. 

this continued for a couple more hours, before eventually, not remembering how, you fell into slumber. 

⎯⎯⎯⎯ ❦ ⎯⎯⎯⎯

arising the next morning after what was not enough hours of sleep, your mind immediately went to the messages you sent last night, and you quickly opened your phone—only to be met with no reply, yet again. 

your face grew a deep frown as you turned, face in your pillow, to let out a long, agonising groan. 

you checked your phone again with a glimpse of hope that maybe he sent a reply in the last few seconds, but of course, there was nothing. however, you did notice the time, and you realised how early it still was. he was probably still asleep. 

lost in your thoughts, you ceased to notice your eyelids fall heavy, and before you knew it, you were returned to dreamland. 

the day continued, and you ended up waking up not too long after falling back asleep, getting up to start the day. 

hours passed, and there was still no word from jake, and you were beginning to get worried. it was now deep into the afternoon, he had to have woken up at some point and seen your message. 

so instead of waiting on a reply that may never even come, you decided to take things into your own hands, and go to him yourself. 

⎯⎯⎯⎯ ❦ ⎯⎯⎯⎯

the violent knocking on jake’s door had him knowing exactly who it was who wanted to see him, because who else would be so desperate to talk to him face to face? he could only think of one person, and that was you. 

he was hesitant to answer, but he also knew better than to leave you outside in the cold, and with your persistent personality, he just had a feeling that if he didn’t open the door anytime soon, you’d still wait, even if it meant spending an hour in the cold. 

“what do you want?” jake asked you after using everything he had in him to open the door. 

“can we talk?” you asked, a soft and gentle tone in your voice. “please?”

after looking at you for a second longer, he decided to let you in. 

“how are you?” you started, genuinely concerned. 

“fine,” jake answered, flat and blatant. 

he led you to the living room where he then sat down before gesturing with only the movement of his hand for you to do the same. 

you took a seat a few feet away. 

“can we talk about what happened yesterday?” you asked, breaking the tense silence, “i don’t like the way we left things, and i think it’s taking a toll on us both.”

“fine,” there it was again with his one-word answers.  

you sighed. 

“i was only sitting with lily that day because it was sunghoon’s idea to have the 02z unit sit together for dinner,” jake took initiative to explain. “and this was planned before we even had that long practice that day—the day you and i had to stay overtime.”

you nodded to let him know you were following. 

he continued, “i didn’t expect it to hurt you, and it was never my intention to, but i recognise that i should have maybe thought of how you would feel about it before i did it.”

his explanation hit you so deeply that you felt lame about the justification of your actions that you were planning to give. 

“yeah,” you nodded, eyes on your fidgeting fingers laying on your lap, “thanks, jake.”

he sat there, briefly looking into your eyes before giving you a casual smile and a single nod. 

now, it was time for your side, “after seeing you sitting with lily—and jay and sunghoon—i ended up sitting with liz, chaewon and jungwon. and i hope you don’t find that strange or bad because you know, everyone knows, that me and jungwon are close and we’ve known each other for years longer than anyone else on the team. so that was a reason why we were sitting together. and then another reason was because he’s chaewon’s partner for this season, and they wanted to sit together.”

jake hummed in understanding. 

“but that’s no excuse for kissing him,” you went on, eyes unable to meet his. “i’m sorry for kissing jungwon. i didn’t know something was going on between me and you after seeing you seem so close with lily. and i don’t know if you know, but i used to like jungwon a long time ago.”

you let out a soft laugh as you reminisced. 

you continued, “so i guess, during 7 minutes in heaven, when jungwon confessed to me, some of those feelings just came back, and a part of me was also still upset at you—which i’m not anymore, because i understand now.”

interrupting you for a brief moment, jake said, “wait, sorry, but before you continue, it’s almost time for practice actually. want me to drive you?”

“oh,” you let out. “yeah, that would be great.”

“okay, we should get going now then,” he let you know before you both stood up and began making your way to the door. “sorry, continue.”

“but yeah,” you started again, “i guess that’s just what was going on in my mind at the time. and i didn’t think it mattered, because i didn’t know you thought you and i were almost a thing.”

“i didn’t think we were, and i still don’t,” jake clarified while he led you to the car, “but i thought we were on the path to maybe something more than just—friends.”

“is that what you want?” you asked in a soft tone as you gave a small smile. 

“do you want it?” he replied. 

you laughed, “i asked you first,” 

“fine,” he smiled, stopping in his tracks and turning to face you. “yeah, i don’t think it’d be such a bad idea.”

“yeah?”

“yeah.”

“okay,” you said. “well, me too.”

a hopeful grin grew to his lips, “so does that mean—?”

suddenly, leaning in, you left a quick kiss on jake’s cheek. and as his eyes grew wide and looked at you, you had already turned on your heel and began speed walking away. 

however, before you could barely even make it three steps away, he called your name and said, “you missed.”

you turned around and smirked before asking, “wanna show me how it’s done then?”

he sent you a cheeky grin in return before quickly grabbing your chin and placing his lips on yours. 

you felt as he smiled through the kiss, and you closed your eyes, practically melting on the spot. 

eventually, he pulled back slightly with a smirk, whispering against your lips, “this is to make up for the seven minutes we lost in the closet the other day.”

and with an almost urgency, he pressed his lips against yours again, this time more passionately, so many feelings that were built up over these two years being expressed through that one kiss. and you loved every second of it. 

⎯⎯⎯⎯ ❦ ⎯⎯⎯⎯

holding the end pose as you and your boyfriend practised the dance routine for one of the last times ever, he told you, “i think we’re ready. 

you nodded, agreeing, before replying, “i think so too.”

his shining smile graced his lips as he couldn't take his eyes off of you. 

still holding the last pose, with faces just inches apart, jake leaned it to kiss you—a lot. 

it started with just one peck, which led to another. and another. and another, until he left no area of your face untouched. 

and before he finished, he left one last long kiss on your lips. 

eventually pulling away, you asked him with a cheeky smile, “what was that for?”

“just making up for lost time.”

and with his answer, he only dived down to kiss you more, thoughts filling his dazed and drunken mind of how happy he was to have gotten you as his partner—not only for dance, but for life. 

AUTHOR’S NOTE → thank you so, so, so, so much for reading until the end !! that means so much to me, and i rlly hope this was an enjoyable read. if you liked it, it would help out a ton if you liked and reblogged and even left feedback as well! whenever i read feedback from y’all it makes my day and just motivates me write more, truly <3 also, as some of you know, this was my first time ever writing a fic so long, let alone a fic over 4k words :’> i hope i did it justice, especially considering it was for jake ,, and for his birthday ,, haha. also i’m sorry, this fic was a lil self indulgent kdndj loll ,, and tell me why i started shipping jungwon and y/n more than jake and y/n as i was writing that one scene- JSJSJDJD *heads to the corner to cRY* no but in all seriousness, this was such a fun one to write, especially for jake. thank you for reading and thank you in advance for your love and support on this one <3 and ofc, happy jake day <3 i love you all !! thanks for reading <3

#enhypen #enhypen imagines #enhypen fluff #enhypen x reader #enhypen scenarios #enhypen reactions #enhypen oneshots #enhypen fic #enhypen x you #jake #jake sim #sim jaeyun #jake fluff #jake imagines #jake x reader #jake scenarios #jake reactions #jaeyun fluff #jaeyun x reader #jaeyun imagines

[keys-hellscape-1020]

Hobie With Autistic!Reader

A/N: I really wanted to try and make this a one-shot but I just couldn’t think of a good prompt so I resigned myself to headcannons. If you have a good prompt with an autistic reader though send it my way I would love to write it!! @juvenile-arm here u go hun <3 hope it’s to your liking! Sorry it took so long.

Hobie Brown x Autistic!gn!Reader

Summary: How Hobie Brown would act with an Autistic significant other.

Content: slight food aversion, mentions of overstimulation, mentions of meltdown, fluff

————

To begin, there is absolutely no feeling lesser because you’re not “normal”. That kind of thinking goes against everything Hobie believes in. You might not be “typical” but he isn’t either and he thinks it great that you’re not. It’s literally ingrained in you to fight the system and he loves that about you, even when you don’t.

You don’t have to worry about subtle social cues with Hobie, he’s the type to always say exactly what he means in plain language. Which is a blessing and a curse, but you appreciate it either way.

He’ll also really want you to meet his friends, but he understands that the pub might be to loud and crowded for your senses + having to meet new people and be social on top of that.

He’ll suggest that you all go to a park instead, his friends will probably question him briefly, as he not really the “let’s go have a picnic in a park” kind of person but once he explains that he wants you to meet them and you don’t like crowded spaces they’ll agree with no hesitation.

I have no doubt in my mind that Hobie’s friends are punk, or at least share his values. They want to meet the person who has their friend so smitten but not if that means you’ll be uncomfortable. Time for a bunch of punks to have a picnic in a park.

On the topic of his friends, he’ll absolutely want you to come to one of his performances, but he also doesn’t want you to get overstimulated. His solution is to have you sit on the side of the stage (where no one can see you) so you can still hear and see his performance but without having to be so crowded. He’ll also get you a pair of noise-canceling headphones for if the sound gets to much.

On a completely different note, food. I for one tend to hyper-fixate on foods super bad and that’s all I want to eat. Hobie won’t even question that, he’ll just ask if you want him to pick it up while he’s at the store. He’ll also work around any textures/flavors you might not like. When a recipe calls for an ingredient you don’t like but he does he’ll just pour your portion into a separate pan and keep cooking. It doesn’t bother him, so long as you wash the dishes.

On the subject of touch, if you say you don’t want to be touched right now he might pout for a moment but that will be all. He’ll bounce right back and just continue with his plans. His first love language is Physical touch but quality time is a close second and he’ll make do until you’re okay being touched again.

If you’re the type where overstimulation sneaks up on you Hobie will take to carrying a pair of earplugs, so if you start to have a meltdown you can put them in while he works on getting you both out of the environment that overstimulated you.

If you do end up getting overstimulated and having a meltdown he will get you to a quite, calm space as quickly as possible. Once there he’ll just sit with you, but he’s not the type to stare at you while you try to calm down (idk about y’all but I’ve had people do that). He’ll probably ask you before-hand what he can do that helps you. Whatever it is he’ll do his best to make it happen. He’ll probably hum a song under his breath, a gentle soft one, maybe a lullaby his mom used to sing to him when he was younger.

All in all this man doesn’t treat you like you’re different, these are things that he would do for any one he cares about if they need him to. A true provider through-and-through, and always there for you.

#key writing #hobie brown #hobie x you #hobie brown atsv #hobie x reader #hobie brown x reader #spider punk #spider punk x reader #atsv hobie #atsv x reader #hobart brown #across the spiderverse #spider man: across the spider verse #atsv fanfiction #atsv headcanons #this was so quick and messy #I know I can do SO much better I just COULDNT THINK OF ANYTHING #so please for my own sanity let me know if you have any ideas #my brain is soup but the soup is actually just broth but the broth is actually just water with food dye

[wrathofrats]

I am here to request a part 3 to that Angsty SwissDew Phantom fic going on if you have more ideas 👀 -🌱

Yes I promise Swissdew make up, I won’t leave them like that for too long.

Here’s for everyone yelling at me to fix them. This is technically part 3 in this weird saga.

I made it worse before I made it better BUT I DID MAKE IT BETTER SO

(For those who are used to my usual insanity around here, trust me I’m working hard for October, I hope you’re excited!!)

You can read the first two parts here and here

They don’t speak for days. Swiss too ashamed of his actions to face dew, and dew is too embarrassed over his outburst to face Swiss. They both mull over the situation the entire time they’re apart. Itching to speak to the other but wondering if the damage had been done, if they’ll accept the others apology.

Swiss knows he’s in the wrong. It’s a feeling that eats at him because although he’s never been one that can’t admit his faults, this one makes him feel ashamed of himself. The countless mistakes that all piled on top of dew to handle and he didn’t even take the time to sit and talk with him anymore since aethers been gone. He’s barely made the time to sit with himself to handle his own emotions.

Swiss knows it was a stupid approach to try and ignore losing such a close packmate. The idea that if you never stop doing things you won’t have the time to truly sit with your grief. It’s why he’s been so clingy to phantom. It’s why he’s taken on extra work around the abbey. It’s why he’s been ignoring dew.

Dew took an opposite approach, something much more self destructive. He lets the grief eat away at him until he’s a sad shell of his former self because in dews mind what’s the point if his closest pack mate isn’t there?

He can’t act normal because nothing is normal anymore. It never will be.

Opposite ends of an equally destructive path and it’s no wonder they both don’t know how to act around each other anymore. Swiss doesn’t see dew in those less than firey eyes anymore and dews been convinced that Swiss has dropped him like a broken toy, too damaged to play with.

Swiss still sees aether in dew. Small pieces that put his heart in his throat and squeezes his lungs because he knows dew will fight tooth and nail for every last bit of him.

The books that stay on his night stand, no doubt being picked through night by night. Dew hoping if he throws himself into the literature aether loved he can gain enough of him back to quell the ache in his stomach.

The cologne he wore everyday has now become a room spray, the scent sometimes wafting under the door.

He’s even kept the last cup aether used to drink water in his room on the nightstand. When mountain tried to take it to help clean up the mess of dews greiving he received a long gash through his arm, dew screaming at him to not touch it.

And after all of this Swiss still never tried to help.

His stomach continues to hurt.

Phantom reminds him of aether too. The light in his eyes while he learns, the smell of quintessence, swiss realizes that that’s why he’s been clinging so hard. He’s been trying to relive his friendship through the new ghoul.

The look in dews eyes starts to make sense to him. A painful glare in their direction because dew thinks he’s trying to replace aether. It’s why he yelled when phantom came in. It’s why he freaked out when he saw them. It’s why he can’t even look at the poor younger ghoul. It’s why Swiss looked so frightened when he witnessed this, because he’s not looking at phantom as phantom. He was looking at him as aether.

It’s a hard debate between telling himself dew needed him and that dew was going to destroy himself no matter what he did to prevent it.

Dews also one of his closest friends. And even if he was going to hurt himself trying to cope with the trauma, Swiss is damned if he’s going to sit around and simply let him.

He hopes it’s not too late.

-

Dew doesn’t take the situation that happened between them well either. Already feeling abandoned by Swiss and then he looks at him like he doesn’t even know him. Dew feels like he’s not himself anymore. Merely a puppet or a cheap imitation. He doesn’t find joy in many things anymore, he barely leaves his room. He feels like a burden with his heavy emotions, like he’s too much and that must be why Swiss doesn’t talk to him.

He wonders if he was wrong. If he lashed out too harshly. Did he deserve it? To be treated like he needs magic to fix him? Did he deserve to be treated like he needs fixing?

Does he need to be fixed?

A fire claws at his throat at the thought.

-

Dew jumps when he hears a knock. No one really checks on him too much anymore when he gets like this. He’s assumed to want to be left alone.

“Please let me in” Swiss says. It sounds like he’s being crying.

“Ok” dew calls timidly. He debated staying silent, or even just begging him to leave. But it’s hard to say no to someone he loves and has missed so deeply.

“I want to apologize”

“You don’t have to”

“But I do. I hurt you and that’s not ok. Please let me explain it to you” Swiss moves closer to dew, tests the waters.

Dew just nods slowly in response.

“I’m sorry I abandoned you. You didn’t do anything wrong. I was scared and didn’t want to handle my own grief and you got the bad end of that stick and you don’t deserve that.” He starts

Tears prick at dews eyes when he says you don’t deserve that, it should be an obvious statement but to hear it outloud is vindicating and more than he could ask for at this moment.

“You needed me and I spent my time with someone else instead of helping you when I knew you needed it. I still see a lot of aether in you, and it didn’t know how to handle it. I ran instead of being rational.”

Swiss looks like he’s crying too. It hurts to admit everything. How terrible he’s been.

“I tried to fix you with magic, I wanted old you back and i didn’t try to care for you to get that back, I wanted to do it the easy way and again you don’t deserve that. You don’t need fixed dewdrop.”

you don’t need fixed dewdrop

Dew hiccups at the words

“I’m sorry. I love you. I love and care about you so much and I’m going to do better if you’ll let me” Swiss looks back up. Both are crying heavily.

Dew just nods and collapses into the multi ghoul. He’s warm and smells of bergamot. The arms that wrap around him feel like home again and dew realizes how much he’s missed this.

Swiss tries to hold onto him for dear life. Like he may change his mind if he doesn’t.

The wound is still fresh and open but for now they just lay in dews bed together. Limbs wrapped around each other and sweet nothings whispered into soft skin.

Things haven’t been solved. But swiss is just happy to have his fire ghoul back in his arms.

#I have so many words ideas #yes I’ll make them worse again later #idc this is my blog I’ll fuck them over how I please #I say in between rapid writing smut #I hope y’all are ready for KINKTOBER WOOOOO #anyways! #the band ghost #ghost #nameless ghouls #ghost bc #fanfic #swiss ghoul #wrath writes #dewdrop ghoul #angst

[vxmpyr-clxb]

☆ . . . HYUNG LiNE!

 ❛ LEE HEESEUNG ❜  ꜝꜞ

CONTACT NAME. doe eyes 🦌  ( his : starry eyed 🌟)

SHIP NAME. sage + heesung = saesung / sungsae / heege

RELATIONSHIP. in the beginning they had a sort of rivalry. during i-land they had a misunderstanding and from then on they were rivals/enemies, but when they realized there was a possibility of them both making it into the group, they sat down and talked out their issues. as of now, heesung takes on a more caring role towards the girl in their day to day life.

the two met before i-land but were never friends, they just knew of each other because of what people told them about each other. 

Heeseung was an ace trainee and everyone knew it, including Sage. This intimidated the girl because of how everyone spoke so highly of him. 

the only time they hung out was when mutual friends of theirs went out to eat to celebrate passing a monthly evaluation and both were invited. 

even then, they only exchanged a few words mostly because they sat at separate tables. 

and skip to i-land days, when heeseung saw her enter he knew she was a tough contestant 

the older opted to be a friend rather than a foe so he quickly went up to her and started a conversation post-first performance

this convo did not go as he planned

the two had a misunderstanding and Sage mistook Heesung's attempt at befriending her for him trying to sabotage her. their “rivalry” continued for a few more weeks ( a couple of episodes ) before the two realized they might debut together and talked it out

Heeseung reminded Sage of one of her best friends from back in New York and she thinks that was why they grew so close in such a short time. 

nowadays Heesung is one of the ones who is very big on making sure Sage is doing alright

being the oldest, even though he doesn’t act it a lot, heesung likes to look after her even more so because she’s the only girl

he knows she doesn’t want to be treated any differently and he tries to adhere to that, but he also understands she has extra stress put on her because she is the only girl 

when she's wearing a skirt and the stylists don’t give her a jacket, he'll lend her his && when she has solo promotions, he always calls to make sure she's doing alright

her knight in shining armor frfr

but that’s not to say she doesn’t help him too. she helps to make him feel like a kid again ( him and jungwon but we’ll get into that later )

when they hang out they typically play basketball together, write lyrics, practice/run through the choreography from their songs, and or play video games

sometimes they’ll also go to the gym together as well. the girl likes to tag along with the other members every once and a while ( usually Heesung, Niki, & Jake).

 ❛ PARK JONGSEONG ❜  ꜝꜞ

CONTACT NAME. bank account 💸 ( his : sage 🌱 )

SHIP NAME. jay / jongseong + sage = song-seong / sang-seong

RELATIONSHIP. although they didn’t know each other before the show, when  the two first met, sage didn’t really like the boy. she thought he was competition and didn’t want to lose to him at all. so she did everything she could to make sure she ranked higher than him. but as time went on, sage began to notice tiny things about his attitude and they soon developed a friendship which was mainly based on looking out for each other and helping the other.

when Jay was struggling in the show, she was the one who could be seen next to him, teaching him and lifting his spirits. she saw how he continued to grow and learn and would’ve hated to see him waste his talent.

in exchange, Jay would be the one protecting Sage from rude comments and her own temper. 

^ whenever the boys on i-land would make any comments about her being a girl or doubting her skills she tended to get riled up and Jay would be the one to calm her down and or defend her

unlike heeseung, who mainly makes sure she's physically okay, Jay is the one who makes sure she is mentally and emotionally okay.

he does a lot of checkups on her because he knows that Sage tends to put up an act a lot of the time to not worry anyone

sage is Jay's official helper/chef. jay likes to cook for everyone else, but sage comes from a family where food is a love language so she likes to give him a break here and there and helps to feed the others.

jay asked sage ( + niki )  to help him with learning japanese and the girl also teaches him bits and pieces of the other languages she knows too

sage also likes to share some recipes she’s learned from her family throughout the years and with these she typically records blogs that she posts on her youtube channel

their favorite activities to do together are cooking, watching movies/shows together, and shopping.

jay also has a habit of shopping for other people when they're out. especially when it comes to sage cause they're very interested in fashion and clothing so he often buys her thing she thinks she'd look good in.

in some of her vlogs/lives sage can be seen shopping for jay and the other boys and she has clothes saved to carts and wish lists she's made in preparation for birthday's and other reasons to give gifts

 ❛ SHIM JAEYUN ❜  ꜝꜞ

CONTACT NAME. PARTY PARTY WHOO 🥳 ( his : don’t answer 🛑 )

SHIP NAME. jake / jaeyun + sage / segye = sae-yun / sa-ke

RELATIONSHIP. these two had became friends quickly on the show due to them being the few who spoke english as a main language as well as sage making jokes and comments in english during their stay at i-land. jake and teagan are the two members who cause the most amount of chaos together and should not be left to their own devices for longer than five minutes. that being said..jake and sage are known for their clumsiness, iconic moments, and their chemistry.

being as though in i-land, they were part of the few who could speak english, they were seen speaking in english with each other almost all the time  

the members say that they're always fighting

teagan loves teasing him by joking that he’s such a nerd for liking physics && jake teases sage for her clumsiness and her bad habits

the two are known for their dynamic where they’re able to joke about anything and go for each other’s throat with jokes

as well as them being the main two ( + jay ofc ) who speak english, they make stupid dirty jokes at the worst times

one of their most iconic moments being when the two of them, mid interview, lock eyes and burst into laughter and throughout the whole video they’re just seen whispering back and forth and holding in their laughter.

ALSO- them both being from wealthy families?? even more of a connection

the two of them showing off things they bought on lives and fans blowing up hashtags on twitter about how the items they showed cost like a 1000+ bucks/millions of won

their favorite activities to do together are having movie nights, play goofy sleepover games when they hang out, exploring places in seoul together, playing puzzle games, doing escape rooms, and talking about their doggies!

these two may not have a whole lot to say about their dynamic but don’t take that as them not caring for the other

the clumsy twins. sage known for tripping, even on nothing, and jake for tripping over people and falling into desks

jake is literally whipped for this girl like whaaat

he’ll deny it every chance he gets, but he’s always there to help her and adores her sm

teagan is also a victim of jake’s charms but the two hang out so often she claims she’s immune now

sage was named Layla's official godmother by Jake and he was named Rex’s official godfather by her

 ❛ PARK SUNGHOON ❜  ꜝꜞ

CONTACT NAME. elsa ❄️ ( his : anna 🍁 )

SHIP NAME. sunghoon + sage = sage-hoon

RELATIONSHIP. due to training at bighit previously, and both of them taking up ice skating as a hobby, these two already sort of knew each other, but they never really spoke to each other one on one. and when teagan’s eye-catching performance got all 23/24 votes? sunghoon wanted to befriend her even more. and later on, her close relationship with jake helped her and sunghoon bond more. the two treat each other more or less like siblings nowadays.

Segye recognized Hoon mostly for his ice skating days. although she was nowhere near as good or in love with the sport, she did like to stay updated on those around Korea & Sunghoon was included in that.

after realizing that it was him, she quickly struck up a conversation with the boy. this took sunghoon by surprise, being as though she knew him for ice skating, and they had a small conversation about their shared admiration of the sport.

during and after i-land they were known as the opposites attract duo

very much popular x loner energy.

they bring each other's playful/chaotic side out

he isn't one to show much affection physically but Sage knows he supports her through his actions

does Teagan need water? he's already on it. she's stressed because of uni? he has set up her game on her computer in her room.

in exchange, Sage is always there when he needs to vent or just someone to sit with.

during one of their comebacks sunghoon was stressing out and having a rough time so on the one day they were free she asked him to come out with her, he said yes thinking she was going to the movies or shopping, but she actually took him to an ice rink she rented for a couple of hours so he could have some fun

he even ended up teaching her one of his old routines

funnily enough, these two— at least in my head, are the real-life embodiment of todoroki and izuku from bnha.

because like, at first Sage would just talk and sunghoon would just listen. so much so that while on i-land, a lot of people thought he was just tuning her out. and when sunghoon heard one of them say it, he recapped word for word what Sage said and she was gassed for the rest of the week.

their convos are 50% sarcastic

people think sunghoon is completely introverted at first, but Sage is one of the first people he opens up around, revealing his true personality on i-land.

whenever Sage, Jake, and Sunghoon get together prepare for chaos-

long story short, sunghoon is a little shit who cares a lot, but hides it very well. 

#ও 11:11 › @ sage ᶻ 𝘇 𐰁 ˳ ֹ ｡ connections #enhypen 8th member #enhypen addition #kpop addition #kpop oc #oc kpop idol #idol oc #fictional idol oc #kpop female oc #fictional kpop oc #fake kpop idol #fictional idol addition #fake kpop addition #fake kpop oc #fake idol oc #enhypen added member #enhypen oc

[bengiyo]

Two Worlds Ep 2 Stray Thoughts

Last time, we started to meet our major players. Kram and his father are artists who seem to live away from a major city, and are asked to take care of a family friend’s adult son for a bit. I liked the build up of the relationship between Kram and Phupha. When Phupha went back to the city, some gangsters tried to kill him at an art gallery, and he later learned that he’s not the biological son of his father. It seems his dad wanted him dead, and we left at Kram finding Phupha’s body in their hideaway in the woods.

Kram crying over Phupha’s body and also speaking with him was super creepy.

Okay, into the blue water! Thank you, show, for picking up right where I wanted.

Ah, that’s why Kram was so startled when he realized he was drawing Max’s character last episode. That guy killed Kram’s mother.

Damn, he legit tied that man up like a prisoner.

Hopefully I remember that Max’s character is named Tai. I don’t know if it’s going to be helpful that their mirror universe counterparts have the same names and family histories.

Doubt about world hopping is a reasonable response.

Nat sold the fuck out of that fall.

Oh, that hurts. The Phupha on this side doesn’t recognize him. It works as a quick tangible detail, along with the grave marker and abandoned house, to help Kram see that this mirror universe is real.

Interesting. The two worlds are on a time delay as well. Phupha may still die in the next three months.

I was wondering how they’d get Nat to nag Max.

I’m curious how they’ll continue to handle the aura of heteronormativity of these worlds, since Kram and Phupha never defined their relationship, and didn’t seem keen on using terms with baggage. He also held off on explaining it to Tai, who seems to have noticed it. Feeling like Tai and Kram were close in his world and he’s been hoping for signs of potential from this Kram.

Oof, this interview is giving me secondhand embarrassment. However, there’s no problem family connections can’t solve.

I’m glad these guys know they’re not their counterparts. Too bad Tai is catching feelings again.

Mon Taechin kinda reminds me of Nammon Krittanai.

Interesting. I’m curious what possibly bringing Phupha to a world where everyone knows he’s dead will do to both worlds. In one he’s back from the dead. In another he goes missing mysteriously.

I don’t think this one has really grabbed me yet, but I’m willing to be a little patient because it feels like it’s trying to get somewhere.

#Ben watches #two worlds #two worlds the series #thai bl #bl series

[wigglebox]

Thoughts on the SPNWIN Finale

Okay so I’m gonna divide this into two parts: Implications for the future of where this show will go, and then implications for a potential continuation. 

**This is me writing after only seeing the episode once and then popping through here and there to try and remember things, but I may mis-remember or misinterpret but I wanna get these first thoughts out of the way!**

First off, just to quickly summarize my thoughts at the top: I really loved it. 

They had a hard hand dealt with this show, which is, only 13 episodes and no promise of a season 2. Because of that, they had to write it in a way that both closed this season but kept the door cracked open for more season. It’s a very very hard balance to do, but I think they still did it. 

To me, I have a lot of questions, but I LIKE having questions because that draws me back for season 2. And, if done properly, it can also lure people into the continuation. 

Implications for the future of SPNWIN

This episode was a whirlwind so I apologize if I mis-remember anything! 

I think the key thing that I took away from this in terms of future potential was the journal. They have Dean’s journal in the sense that Dean and Sam had John’s journal. 

John and Mary take off in the end but I have no doubt in my mind Lata, Carlos, and Ada will all come back and play a part some how as well. 

Which, by the way, the fact that this Carlos was THEE Carlos that was referenced in a Robbie episode a million years ago is so amazing, idk why. Robbie you madman! 

But, now we more or less have the confirmation that this isn’t truly our world, however we are going to be sticking with these characters in the future. Therefore, I don’t know if that means they’ll be universe hopping too, I don’t know if it means they’ll uncover more mysteries from Dean’s journal? I think that’s likely. I also think that will be fun. 

I also ALSO think that will provide more world building for the continuation, like this season already did. 

There is the obvious issue in the room of that being there were only 13 episodes and this may have felt more like a mid-season finale rather than a finale, however not being promised a season 2 has had to have been thee most annoying thing to write around. 

But, for a first season, it set up some solid base foundation work for them to continue to explore more stories while also not screwing around with canon. 

There are still questions I want answered and who knows when or if they’ll ever be answered. The biggest one, however, is what on earth is in that journal?

I have more questions but I need to rewatch the show to form them so they’ll be in a follow up post most likely. 

Another question I have is: Was that really Dean from start to finish? The hair is the biggest thing for me bc J finished filming Big Sky and there was no reason not to cut it, or use a wig of some kind [lol]. But also in general it felt different a little bit. Like it’s still him but also it didn’t feel like him from the pilot and from the photos we were seeing. But it really may well be him all along! I imagine that’s part of the mystery. 

I don’t think we’ll see him again, or if we do, it’s not going to be the same version. I think he served as a launching point. Several friends have made this point already but basically he laid the foundation for all this multi-verse stuff and now the kiddos are on their own and there’s a lottttt to explore. 

Again, I have to rewatch in order to fully form my thoughts on the future for the show. 

My question is gonna be basically are they going to explore different universes? And, how, if Chuck kinda offed all of them? But I’m okay with my questions for now because I like to go with the flow of the show. I don’t want to figure everything out right now. 

Implications for a SPN Continuation

I’ll talk about this first since I have some frens who were disappointed that 1) Cas wasn’t with Jack and Bobby and 2) Cas wasn’t mentioned. 

If you’re new around here, then I’ll cut to the chase now: I am a full on “Cas Is Not In Heaven” believer. There are several reasons why. I am also a “Chuck Won” and “Jack is Chuck” believer. Also several reasons why. 

I don’t believe Cas is in Heaven because they never showed him getting there. “Well Jack got him out of The Empty,” is one of those things that I’ll believe it when I see it, because otherwise, it’s too shady for me. Cas was last taken, alive, to an Empty where everything else was awake and alive and taken on behalf of a deal, not because he died. The Empty has wanted Cas for a while, and has been pissed that he’s gotten out. Cas is a PRIZE for The Empty so I don’t really see it giving up Cas any time soon for any particular reason. 

Especially if that reason is Jack. 

I don’t believe The Empty likes Jack either, especially after their last interaction being so bad (Jack exploding in The Empty, waking everything up). I don’t feel like The Empty is willing to do any favors for him. 

God isn’t supposed to be able to influence The Empty but I think, since Lilith and Lucifer were brought down, that Chuck and The Empty had an arrangement. And from 15x18 to 15x20 I had literally no reason to believe that Cas, a threat to Chuck, would have been let go for any reason, even if Jack was “God” now. 

It would have been sloppy story telling, in my opinon, if they tried to explain how Cas got into Heaven in such a short amount of time, and would have extremely taken away from the emotional magnitude of 15x18. 

And that’s how I felt with 1x13 of The Winchesters. 

If we had seen Cas I would have been upset, I think. Because again, there’s no explanation for him being there. If it wasn’t going to be a *wink wink nudge nudge* thing like “We’ll explain it in the continuation” then I didn’t want it. 

The reason why I feel so passionate about this is beacuse of the Chuck Won theory. And because of that theory, and how Cas’ role evolved over time in Supernatural, I don’t believe Chuck can “recreate” Cas. Because Cas exists outside of Chuck’s narrative, and isn’t beholdened to Chuck, that means Chuck can’t reproduce Cas. It’s just never going to happen. 

And I feel strongly about Chuck not being able to do that SPECIFICALLY because when all is said and done, I don’t EVER want Dean to look at Cas and wonder if he’s real or not (throwback to 15x02 anyone?). 

Therefore, I did not want to see Cas in The Winchesters except for very very very specific ways that I knew deep down wouldn’t happen because this isn’t the show for that. 

And I’m sorry I wish I could go along with the Cas in Heaven memes because they do make me laugh — but also the thought of him being there with no explanation and still not showing up makes me more sad than not. 

And that’s another thing—

With 15x20, and no Cas, there had been conspiracy after conspiracy for the last two and a half years as to why, everywhere between network censorship to Misha secretly filming and then them not showing anything. I’m personally more inclined to believe a mixture of: Censorship (Dean can’t reciprocate so what’s the point) and a deliberate choice on behalf of Dabb. But that’s for a different post because this is already very very long. 

But, him not being in the finale — while it fed into the Chuck Won theory — it also didn’t have enough stability to truly land on one theory or another because COVID restrictions were also blamed (in whatever manner people saw fit to blame it). 

However, NOW — with Cas NOT showing up next to Jack and Bobby — even tho in 15x20 Bobby said that Cas helped Jack — was very LOUD to me. 

So what does that imply, to me?

1) No Cas until they have the time and space to put the story and emotions into it that it deserves. AKA — since I’m a Cas Is In The Empty believer — A rescue, by Dean. Even Jackles at JIB11 said that he’d want to explore that. Both of them have expressed an interest in exploring a follow up to 15x18. They can’t do that in the season finale of a spin off show that hadn’t mentioned them virtually at all (apart from parallels) all season. 

2) No Cas because Cas isn’t there. I’ll get into my “Jack isn’t Jack” thing in a second, but because there was also this choice not to have Cas there — once is a mistake, but twice? Now it’s starting something. Especially since this time, they DID have Jack there. It’s like they’re showing us a Cas-shaped puzzle piece missing. The piece may be missing but you can clearly see the hole and know what’s supposed to be there (kinda like Dean’s reciprocation!).

To me these are interesting storytelling tactics. And that’s what this is, storytelling. 

I feel like maybe we lost the plot a little bit, we being The Fandom, in terms of long-term storytelling efforts. 

Cas being in The Empty still really does open up a TON of plot ideas for a continuation. Is it sad he’s not with Dean right now? Absolutely. But I’d rather have them apart than have a flimsy, unexplained reunion just to have a reunion. 

“They didn’t even mention Cas,” and yeah, maybe they could have, but as friends in Discord servers have pointed out, that also locks them into a story that they may not be able to tell so it’s better to keep it like how it was in 15x20 where Dean never spoke his name. That is, it adds to the uncanny valley of it all. 

Jack isn’t Jack 

Look at this lovely post. This reminds me of the first time I was ever exposed to Chuck Won, Chuck is Jack theory way back in ... I want to say December 2020. Someone had compared Jack’s clothes to Chuck’s, and here we are again. 

Also these tags from @clarkenting​

Jack didn’t feel like Jack. He hasn’t felt like Jack since 15x19. 

I already freak out and ramble a lot about Chuck Won when it comes to Becky’s Notes in 15x04 about “no one even mentions Cas” and the line about rock music and the like. But another note she made was regarding the villain’s monologue at the end and how it kinda sucked. Jack had a monologue at the end. Jenny, in 15x20, said 8 words. 

So Jack post-15x19 has always been suspicious to me! And last night was no different, especially since it’s the most Chuck Like he’s looked. 

Also, another thing that got me, was the reference to Carry On (the Kansas song). It felt super duper pointed and not just an Easter Egg but like — hey this IMMEDIATELY reminds me of 15x20 and how Dean was like, weirdly, “I love this song!” a little too out of character in heaven as he began to drive off. 

Dean’s favorite band isn’t Kansas, it’s Led Zeppelin. 

Also, the reference felt like a fourth wall break, something that Chuck would do. 

So no, I don’t believe that Jack was Jack last night. I’m sure if I go through the dialogue, which I plan to do lol, I’ll find even more reason to believe that. 

Another thing that confused me was Bobby being there. Dean drove off, alone, and was continuously shown alone, throughout his drive. But BOBBY was there last night? Confused I am. But in the good way. 

We know now that Baby can hope planes of existence so I really really hope she can hop into The Empty. 

I’m someone who believes that Dean’s “Heaven” is in reality just The Empty. Or, as sometimes my friends will hear me call it, Chuck’s toy shelf. I am also someone who believes we DID see Chuck in 1x08 as part of the band and it wasn’t just a Rob cameo. Rob’s character has too much implication to just casually toss him in as a background character. 

--

This is super duper long, and I apologize but also not really! 

Some final thoughts (for now) (any follow up posts I make also will be under #spnwin thots):

I think this finale set up things for both a season 2 AND a continuation. I’ve been a contination believer since literally the SPN finale finished airing. At first it was a way to cope, but then it became a full blown belief for me the more and more first Jackles talked about it, and then the rest of the cast. 

I’m really excited for season 2 of The Winchesters should it happen. I really hope it does. I personally believe it has a high chance of migrating to HBO Max for a home — and if that’s the case that’ll be awesome bc I also believe that’s where a continuation will go. 

All of our favorites of the season will be in season 2 as well. We will see Carlos, Lata, Ada, Millie, Betty, Tony, etc. back. There are still questions about their characters too that we need answering. I’m still suspicious of Betty! 

I liked that they contained this just enough for the finale just in case they don’t get a season 2, but still left dangling plot threads to catch for a season 2 (which felt very season 15 of SPN to me. In my eyes, they really did leave some things dangling for a continuation.)

What kind of potential world building will we get now that we know space and time is but an illusion, lol. I like the prequel being used to expand worlds more and expand the canon more, especially when it comes to hopping planes of existence. 

Is The Empty really the big villain, or Chuck? I personally think so, and I personally think that this will help funnel some stuff into a continuation. 

“What about Destiel” yes what about Destiel? That’s a continuation problem but one that I know Jackles and Dee and whoever else will be involved will ultimately tackle as well. I may have more faith and optimism than others, but that’s because I know from past experiences from SPN that I won’t be burned no matter what happens — so if you need me to clown for you, I can! 

What about the Akrida? Do they just stop at this place? Why this particular storyline? What’s going on? We already have alternates to our own timeline that is the Akrida did not finish off our Men of Letters, Baby got into John’s hands via a car dealership (well, according to Chuck anyway), John didn’t know about hunting in our world, etc etc. 

So what else is different? Will they see OUR world? Who is dead, who is alive? Is Chuck gonna send them to other places too?

Only time will tell I guess! 

Time to light those manifestation candles for season 2 and a continuation! 

#long post #very long post i'm so so SO. fucking sorry #spn #spnwin #spnwin spoilers #spnwin thots #spnwin finale #i wrote this all in a frenzy and before i could grab starbucks #and i'm running on 3 hours of sleep #so i apologize if i missed anything #again anything additional i wanna talk about will be under spnwin thots #walejaflwkejfw #time to go on areblog spree

[rippeanuts1950-2000]

Green Is The Color Of Control: A Owl House Poem

The twins have dark green hair

It’s not like mom’s

Her’s is neon green

How they got dark green hair, I don’t know

It doesn’t matter though

They have green hair

And I don’t

My hair is brown

Like my dad’s

I look a lot like him actually

Though I doubt he notices

He’s so busy

I think he forgets he has three kids sometimes

Mom notices though

She sees that I look like him

I don’t think she likes it

The dye smells gross

Like iron mixed in with plastic

I tell mom I don’t want it

That I don’t want my hair to smell bad

Besides I already had a bad day

I had to stop being friends with Willow

Dying my hair will probably make today worse

She tells me that I’m being overdramatic

The twins watch nervously from their spot on the bathroom floor

Part of me wishes dad was here

Maybe he would stop it

But I’m not sure he would

I close my eyes as she starts to dye my hair

When it’s done I look at the mirror in shock

I don’t look like dad anymore

I look like mom

Mom looks happy

The twins look worried

I feel weird

Like this isn’t me

Maybe it isn’t

After mom dyes my hair there are more expectations put on me

Dad continues to do nothing about it

The twins start to distance themselves from me

Mom gets angry if I get less than a 105 on my assignments

The friends she picked out for me don’t seem to get that I need to study

They say I’m being a stick in the mud

I’m not I just don’t want to get scolded for something that could have been prevented

I miss Willow

Mom seems annoyed when I ask her to help me with my hair

“You should be doing this yourself” She tells me

She always complains about this while she does my hair

She pulls way too hard

I ask if I can dye my hair the twins’ hair color

Maybe if my hair looks like them they’ll want to hang out with me more

She scoffs before shaking her head

“Their hair color is too common”

“A Blight must be unique”

It’s the same thing every time I try and ask for a new color

I’m really starting to hate green

I hate how I can’t dye my hair any other color

I hate how proud mom looks when she sees it

I hate the feeling of pride that runs through me when she looks proud

I hate that it’s hard to look at the plant track uniforms

I hate all of this

Green used to be one of my favorite colors

It was the color that reminded me of Willow

The color that reminded me of safety

The color of two of my favorite people on the Isles hair

Before they were mean to me

It was the color of plants Willow would name for me

Now it’s the color of my mother

The color of my father’s negligence

The color of my sibling’s pranks

The color of broken dreams

The color of control.

#the owl house #Toh #Toh poem #amity blight #willow park #edric blight #emira blight #alador blight #odalia blight #toh willow #toh amity #toh edric #toh emira #toh alador #toh odalia

[lunaflyer]

-My Thoughts on Yandere ATSV-

_________________________________________

 -Miles Morales-

=My initial thought of him as a yandere is, that he would be a ‘mild’ or ‘easier’ case.  He would never hurt you, never kidnap you, nor do I think he’d intentionally try to manipulate you.=

=The best way I can explain what he would be like is clingy and a little stalker-ish.=

=He probably not even notice his behavior.  He would reason his stalking as ‘checking in’ or ‘protecting you.’=

=What he’ll do is go out as spider-man and do patrols, however he will oddly pass by your place about 3 times or more during one patrol.=

=His clingy behavior is similar to a bestie friends that attached to the hip.  You like having them around but everyone need a break, and that’s a struggle for him.=

=He will listen to you on if he is being too clingy to some extent.  He’ll back off a little in his ‘normal life’, however this result in more ‘Spidey Check-In’s’=

=If you tend to forget things or leave stuff behind at him place.  They are no longer yours, they’ll be apart of his collection of ‘Random Things You Forgot’.  If you do ever come back to get it, he will try to gain ignorance.=

=Imagine with me now, that scene back in SITSV He had a scene with a security guard where he tried to play dumb… “Who’s Morales?” -Quoted by, Morales.  Just imagine that, but for trying to retrieve your missing stuff.=

 -Pavitr Prabhakar-

=I believe who would be an amazing yandere, in the idea that NO ONE would suspect him.   He is the model citizen when he’s Pat and literal Spider-man, what could he do?  A lot.=

=While I don’t believe he would hurt you.  I would not say that kidnapping is off the table, however only for extreme cases.  Like you trying to leave or he believes a villain would be after you.=

=He would 100% be manipulative, he knows that people view him as innocent and weaponizes that.=

=The first go-to tactics is Guilt tripping.  Say you want some alone time, he will absolutely pull out the, “Oh, ok.. I understand, you’re probably too busy for me.” With the most sweetest tone and paired with puppy-dog eyes.=

=He’d only try to get close with your family, getting them to like him so he could get easy access to you.=

=Like Miles, he is clingy.  Kinda like a dog who gets hyper attached to their human to the point them get really anxious when alone.=

=One funny thing though, is that if you ever make the ‘Chai Tea’ mistake, you are doomed!  Just because your his soulmate, does not except you from such a cardinal sin.  Actually because you’re his soulmate he expects you to know these things and will act as if you’ve danced on his parents’ grave.=   

=Due to his connections and being such a social and like-able person.  He can easily get people to help ‘rein you in’.  So if you ever have doubts about the relationship, you’ll be talked out of it by your shared friends.=

 -Hobie Brown-

=I have a very conflicting feeling about him as a yandere.  Cause he is a very free person.  He does not like labels, he does not want to follow society, and he certainly doesn’t want to be like others who suppress people.=

=So I would characterize him as a very conflicted yandere.  He knows these thought aren’t normal, but at the same time he doesn’t completely hate them.=

=He would never try to kidnap you nor be manipulative.  Out of the group I think him and Miles would be the easiest to put up with because they do have some form of restrain.=

=Originally he was probably freaked out by his thoughts.  Causing him to an uncharacteristically awkward with you.  However as he gets to know you, the thoughts simply continue and he becomes okay with them.=

=Normally he doesn’t get jealous, but that’s normal Hobie.  We are talking about a yandere, so~  He probably act really relaxed, swing his arm on your shoulder and practically hang off you.=

=Since he doesn’t do labels, he isn’t possessive.  What the two of you will do is probably have nicknames and be genially close without having and clear indication of what your relationship is.=

=He’ll try to trust that you can take care of yourself.  After all you will in a world where law enforcement is corrupt so fights are pretty common.  However he will always keep an eye on you.=

=In order to get more yandere out of the guy, something major would have to happen. Like you almost dying in a protest.  That when he gets fully onboard with his dark thoughts.=

 -Gwen Stacy-

=In the movie its shown she struggles with connecting with others.  After such a massive loss it makes things pretty hard to reconnect.  But when she connects with you, oh boy.=

=I feel she will progressively become a yandere overtime.  As she probably doesn’t realize her feeling, or understand them.  So you got a bit of buffer time to escape.=

=Once she figures it out though, you ain’t leaving.=

=I do not think she’s above kidnapping and will stalk you.  She’ll reason it’s for your safety.=

=She also a collector, she’ll collect anything you leave behind and keep it in her drums with some of her important items.=

 -Spot-

=Oh boy, so if you ask him how he would be as a yandere. I’d tell ya that it depends on when you meet him.  Either way though, you’re not escaping.=

=While I doubt he’ll harm you physically, he ain’t doing good stuff to you mentally.  He’ll probably send to random universe just to see you struggle.=

=I feel he is sadistic in a mental way, he likes to see you suffer but not harmed physically.=

=He probably got attached to you as either you were a co-worker from when he worked at Alchemix or were just nice to him after he became spot.=

=You’d probably think he was funny of cute in an awkward way when you first met. That quickly fades as you get closer and his power get stronger.=

=100% uses his powers to get touches when he’s having a rough day.  So it doesn’t matter if your 10 universes away, you’re always a portal away for him.=

=I think he enjoys the hunt, like he’ll send to a new universe and lets you fend for yourself for a bit before trying hunt you down.  It’s almost like a fun ‘couple’ game to him, while it’s life or death for you.=

=Ever since the accident, I feel he has become a bit touched starved.  So any display of affection or tiny touch’s are treasured by him.  Even if they are you trying to hit him.=

#atsv headcanons #yandere #astv #yandere male #across the spiderverse