#I literally have no shame though I do it to every dog I see

[threefuckencrowsinatrenchcoat]

“ew why do you bark back at dogs that’s so cringe” it’s rude to not respond :( they’re talking to me :( MY parents raised my to have manners you fucking douchemill :( and it’s sooo unbelievably funny :( you wish you could bark back at dogs as good as me :(((

#shitpost #dogs #dog #i love my dog #he actually gets so offended when I bark back at him #he doesn’t even bark at me anymore bc he knows what comes next #I literally have no shame though I do it to every dog I see #idc if you disagree #funny #lol #haha #haha funny #but also #haha weird

[itsthatmff]

Boyfriend Headcanons on OPM men

100 follower special!! I didn’t know what situation to take so I just went with regular boyfriend headcanons

I have no idea Why Genos’ part turned out the longest…(my hyperfixation is obviously showing)

Fem!reader

Included: metal bat, Genos, Garou

Genos

It’ll take a while for this guy to get warmed up to you. He has never been in a relationship so he doesn’t really know how it works. This guy has ISSUES alright.

Of course he loves you but he doesn’t know how to deal with these feelings.

Hates physical affection (again just has to get used to it) so often more than not this guy won’t let you touch him affectionately.

“Do not touch me” and “Get off.” Are probably the words you’ve heard most this year.

Though when it does come to touching (pun intended) moments between the two of you, like when you’re hugging or kissing, he longs for more. He likes the feeling so much but would never admit it to you because he doesn’t want to show any ‘weakness’.

Will never make the first move of touching you. But if you ask twice he won’t say no. He just can’t resist you.

When it comes to caring for you he goes all out. Will cook for you, buy you things, even clean your apartment without you asking.

Is also very clingy in a sense that he doesn’t leave you alone. Ever since he fell in love with you you’ve become one of his priorities. You’re working ? He’ll accompany you. Meeting with friends? He has to make sure you won’t get attacked. You’re resting in your apartment? He’ll come over to cook you food.

It makes you feel bad that he suddenly has all his attention on you instead of focusing on training under Saitama and finding the mad cyborg. That goal has been there for him way before you both knew each other after all.

You both may get into little fights because of that.

When it comes to jealousy, this guy gets jealous alright. If he sees you talking to male coworkers/friends he always watches from the distance and furrows his eyebrows. Won’t say anything though.

If there’s a guy harassing you he’ll step in. That guy might get away with no more than a broken hand. Genos says it wasn’t on purpose and that he just wanted to get his hand away from you. (It was VERY MUCH on purpose)

Will deny that he’s jealous until his death. Again he doesn’t want to show ‘weakness’.

Is so protective of you. This guy already has a big sense of justice and will literally self destruct if that means saving human lives. He wouldn’t hesitate to take a bullet for you.

Whenever you’re not around you’re still in his thoughts. When you don’t have time for him he’ll keep himself busy by cleaning saitama’s apartment.

Will go on Saitama’s nerves and talk about you with no end. Will ask for advice. Sometimes he talks too much about you and gets kicked out of saitama’s apartment.

He’s such a dry texter. But dry as in texting paragraphs of formal written texts. That’s why you both prefer calling. He calls you at least once a day just asking how you’re doing. They’re not very long calls. Most of the time they’re short ones where he’ll ask you where you are and if you’re free so that he can come over.

Is overall the most loving cyborg you can get. He just doesn’t like to admit it. The most you’ll get from him if you ask him why he’s calling you on a regular for example is :

“It is my duty as your boyfriend to care for you at all times.”

Extremely difficult to get him to say ‘I love you’ by his own accord. But keep trying !!

Garou

So cocky for no reason whatsoever

Sometimes it feels like you’re dating a dog more than a human.

He’s SO SO SO SO touchy It’s unbelievable. He can’t take his hands off of you. Especially in public. He just needs to show you off.

This guy doesn’t know what having shame is either.

In some sense he feels like he ‘owns’ you.

Unlike Genos he may not spend every second around you but whenever he does it’s either him being all over you or you two bickering.

He may be touchy but is not a romantic at all. He’d rather say “you’re mine” than “I love you”

His love is messy for sure. Like all over the place.

Gets jealous and will beat the shit out of whoever dared to cross your way.

I have a feel he likes biting. Not too hard but more in an affectionate way.

Doesn’t really know what taking you out on a date means. He’ll let you do all the planning and deciding. He genuinely doesn’t care as long as he’s spending his time with you.

If bang knows about your relationship he’ll push him to treat you well. Bang was surrounded by women left and right during his youth and knows his way around it after all. Often Garou will gift you things as roses because ‘the old man forced me to’. He’ll look unbothered but in truth there is a tiny hint of blush on his face.

This guy doesn’t even have a phone 90% of the time. He either looses it or breaks it. You both don’t really need phones to communicate. The moment you think about him he’s right by your side.

Metal bat

Most wholesome boyfriend.

Acts all tough around everyone except you.

The embodiment of “ay ay ma’am”

Whenever you’re both on a date and a Monster attack breaks out he tries playing the tough hero. “Get behind me. I’ll deal with it.”

He’s kind of shy when it comes to touching you. He doesn’t want to be to rough or do something you don’t like. When you go to hug him his entire face turns red.

Genuinely thinks you’re an angel and that you’re too good for him.

At school all he thinks about is you. Will beat his friends up if they make fun of him for that.

Takes you out on many dates. Will buy you bouquets or win you plushies at the arcade. Sometimes he’ll even take you and Zenko out on lunch. It’ll be the cutest thing ever seeing you interact with his little sister.

At first Zenko is a bit jealous that her big brother is giving someone else attention other than herself but she quickly gets used to you and sees you as her own big sis.

He’ll text you good night and apologizes if he forgets to.

Will always ask you if you’ve eaten and make sure you’re always well fed and rested.

Always buys you things that remind him of you during his Hero patrol.

You gifted him a phone charm once and he has not took it off his phone ever since.

He isn’t the type to say ‘I love you’ often. He leaves it for really special moments because he thinks they’re very important words.

#one punch man #garou #genos x reader #headcanons #garou opm #garou x reader #genos #genos one punch man #opm genos #genos x y/n #metal bat x y/n #metal bat #metal bat x reader #my Genos hyperfixation is showing

[starscrimbly]

Percy jackson show has consumed my mind as of recently and i have been given severe brain rot. So before my brain explodes here’s my PJO playlist and the lines/characters that got me to put each song there in the first place

- seven by Taylor Swift

- Annabeth & Percy w/ Grover

- “I’ve been meaning to tell you I think your house is haunted”

- The Family Jewels by MARINA

- All the Demigods really but specifically Piper and her attitude towards Drew

- “Did I beat you at your own game? typical of me to put us all to shame”

- Brutus by the Buttress

- Luke and his relationship with Hermes

- “And as I set to face it, I’m unsure should I embrace it, should I run? What motivates me? Hatred? Is it love?”

- Also Clarisse (I will never be my fathers favorite son) La Rue and how she first feels about Percy

- “Whats more wrong; that I too wish to be great or my mother (father) wished she’d had a son?”

- Not Strong Enough by boygenius

- LITERALLY EVERY DEMIGOD EVER

- “Always an angel, never a god.”

- Percy & his speech that was like every undiagnosed autistic kids 3 am thoughts

- “I don’t know why I am the way I am”

- Soldier, Poet, King by the Oh Hellos

- Annabeth, Grover, Percy

- do i even need to explain, the whole song literally

- The Archer by Taylor Swift

- Thalia (she is THE ARCHER)

- “I’ve been the archer, I’ve been the prey. Who could ever leave me darling, and who could stay?”

- this is me trying by Taylor Swift

- Annabeth: directed at her mother

- “I was so ahead of the curve that the curve became a sphere… I just wanted you to know this is me trying.”

- Achilles Come Down by Gang of Youths

- Clarisse and Silena as an Achilles & Patroclus parallel

- “The self is not so weightless nor whole and unbroken… so jump and I’m jumping since there is no me without you.”

- I Bet on Losing Dogs by Mitski

- Percy with every demigod ever :( (Ethan, Luke, Zoe, Bianca, Silena, Charles…)

- “I bet on losing, I know they’re losing and I pay for my place by the ring… I’m losing by their side”

- Class of 2013 by Mitski

- Annabeth

- “And I’ll leave once I figure out how to pay for my own life too, Mom, would you wash my back this once, and then we can forget...”

- Last words of a Shooting Star

- Zoe (I can see the stars m’lady)

- “And you’d say you love me and look in my eyes but I know through mine you were looking in yours… I am relieved I left my room tidy goodbye”

- Wasted Summer by juju

- Annabeth and her relationship with Luke

- “I wasted like half of my summer(s) tryna hold on your hand you’re the leech I’m the man I guess you don’t understand”

- Bite the Hand by boygenius

- The campers to their godly parents

- “Maybe I’m afraid of you I’ll bite the hand that feeds me, bite the hand, I’ll bite the hand that needs me”

- Vampire Empire (demo version) by big thief

- Annabeth & Athena (also her dad) but also like every demigod and their parent

- “You turn me inside out then you want me outside in you spin me all around and then you ask me not to spin”

- Cool About it by boygenius

- Nico with Percy post crush reveal

- “I’ll pretend being with you doesn’t feel like drowning, tellin you it’s nice to see how good your doing even though we know it isn’t true”

- Letter to an Old Poet by boygenius

- Annabeth & Thalia towards Luke

- “You’re not special you’re evil, you don’t get to tell me to calm down.”

- Come Over Again by Crawlers

- Annabeth with Luke when talking about Thalia

- “Take her name out of your mouth you don’t deserve to mourn.”

- Goodbye, My Danish Sweetheart by Mitski

- Annabeth with Athena (disregard the romance)

- “I don’t blame you if you want to bury me in your memory I’m not the girl I ought to be”

- First Love/Late Spring

- Annabeth and Percy

- “And I was so young when I behaved 25 and now I find I’ve grown into a tall child.”

- Eat your Young by Hozier

- The Gods constantly sending their kids into hopeless situations and not caring

- “Seven new ways you can eat your young, come and get some, skinnin’ the children for a war drum.”

- Inkpot Gods by The Amazing Devil

- ANNABETH AND PERCY

- Percy: “Please, let her live just one more day cause she is so much more than all her scars… I’ll stay, because I will be the man my father never was”

- Annabeth: “Please rest assured that you might not fear a man, but to a woman, by the end, you’ll kneel and plea. Cause I’m more than what my mum told me to be”

- I Know the End by Phoebe Bridgers

- Percy, Annabeth and Grover: specifically the lightning bolt quest

- “Let the ultraviolet cover me up, whent lookiung for a creation myth… slot machines, fear of god, windows down, heater on, big bolts of lightning hanging low”

- Never Love an Anchor by The Crane Wives

- Hermes and Luke

- Luke: “On some level I think I understood, that a ship could never really love an anchor, so I did the only thing that I could and severed the rope to set you sailing from my harbor.”

- Hermes: “And you'll never see the reasons I had, for keeping my claws away when they were close enough to hurt you, I am selfish, I am broken, I am cruel… wonder why they never soothed your fevers? And wonder why they never tied your shoes?”

#percy jackon and the olympians #spotify playlist #character playlist #concept playlist #music playlist #percy and annabeth #percy pjo #percy jackson #percy and grover #percy jackson show #luke castellan #nico di angelo #clarisse la rue #silena beauregard #grover underwood #annabeth chase #thalia grace

[fusionnukacola]

How about sole bringing the companions to Nuka World and like what they enjoy doing the most there? I’m currently playing that dlc and I just wish you and your companion could go on rides together or for them to at least react to some of the things going on. Oh and also the raiders are probably not there anymore and the amusement park is safer now

Thank you for the request! I'm going into this with the assumption that all the rides are fixed.

Cait: Honestly, doesn't pay much attention to the rides. She's more focused on finding the crate of Nuka-Dark she just knows Sole keeps in the penthouse. However, she won't say no if you ask to go on some of the more exciting rides like the ArcJet G-Force. If romanced, comments on how sturdy the double bed looks in the penthouse, and makes a suggestive comment saying they should test it out for safety reasons.

Codsworth: Doesn't go on most of the rides because he can't, but he can sort of go on the Teacups, so that's around the only one he likes. All throughout the park he's talking to Sole about the time they came here with their partner and baby Shaun. Constantly comments on all the dust on the rides, saying it's a shame for them not to have been in use before. He's a fan of the ride there, saying it's nice seeing the views.

Curie: Absolutely loves the Teacups and the Ferris Wheel. Curie isn't much of a fan of the thriller rides, so she sticks to the safer ones. The second she sees them though, she wants to know exactly how they work. Not much of a fan of seeing all the grime the raiders that previously lived there accumulated.

Danse: Pretends he doesn't want to go on the various rides, claiming it's a matter of safety. However, he secretly wants to go on some of the rollercoasters. Sole has caught him on more than one occasion staring at the Nuka-Rockets, but every time they ask about it he says that he is simply observing it. If romanced, will eventually say yes, and Sole even gets a photo of the two of them.

Deacon: Goes on every. single. ride. This man will grab Sole's hand and sprint to lead them to rides. He doesn't go ride to ride, instead picking a random ride, even if it's miles away. Begs Sole to get the popcorn and hot dog makers working. If romanced, kisses Sole at the top of every ride.

Hancock: Immediately suggests having sex on every ride. Romanced or not. If not, probably is saying it as a joke. (Probably.) Goes on the high-speed rollercoasters the most, but also likes the easier ones, like the carousel. He says it's a "pallet cleanser."

MacCready: You ALREADY KNOW he's heading straight for Safari Center. When he meets Cito, he literally goes insane. Asks for an autograph. Cito doesn't know what that is. Loves the Angry Anaconda. He'll ask to ride it again and again. Tells Sole they should start selling tickets to it, that they could make a lot of caps.

Nick: Makes comments about the few times he and Jennifer came here. Mostly likes the ferris wheel, and says he's too old for the rollercoasters. If romanced, he'll give Sole a peck at the top of the ferris wheel, like a gentleman.

Piper: Documents at every turn. When she gets back to Diamond city, she immediately posts an article about it all. Almost every settler is in line for the amusement park after that. Likes the more half & half rides, nothing too slow or fast. Her favorite is the Cola-cars arena.

Preston: Explains how grateful he is to Sole for clearing out the raiders that occupied the park before anything. Initially a little scared of going on the rides for safety, but once Sole explains how they already rode the rides, he's convinced. Not before lightly scolding them for doing that, of course.

Strong: Can't really, well, fit on any of the rides because of how tall he is, but that's probably for the best. Doesn't like any of the rides.

X6-88: Does not go on a single ride. Says it's for safety, and because he "does NOT want to get any of that.. sticky Commonwealth grime on him." He doesn't like Nuka-Cola.

#fallout 4 companions #fallout 4 #fallout #cait fallout 4 #cait #curie #paladin danse #deacon fallout 4 #hancock #maccready #nick valentine #piper wright #preston garvey #strong #x6-88 #fallout 4 companions react

[quill-pen]

I should be sleeping or at least in bed, but late-night creativity always seems to hit me hard. Probably because it's the time of day I can actually sit down and just write without being interrupted while everything and everyone else sleeps. I always regret it in the morning though. lmao--kill me!

Anyway, this wasn't supposed to be a ficlet. I was just going to do another little conversation thing like I normally do, but then my mind said, "Ya know, this would be a fun little thing to write." So... I did. I went all out and did. And it was fun! Except it kept me up until nearly 1 am. Again. Oy....

Anyway--on with the ficlet!

Slight NSFW--I'm gonna go ahead and say 18+ and "Minors get lost" just to be safe.

Summary: A quick comparison of two of my favorite ships from my Scroogeverse: Tom and Addie and Ebenezer and Bess. Which couple wins? You decide!

Warnings: Surprise, surprise--most of these are for Ebeness: brief mention of body-shaming, groping, mention of genitals, dirty talking, lusty idiots in love--I'm surprised there isn't more. As of now, not edited.

Toddie Vs. Ebeness

Addie Shaw, soon to be Jenkins, leaned heavily against the front counter of Jenkins' Toys and Games, watching as the owner of the establishment and her fiancé, Tom Jenkins, checked the inventory on the shelves. Every so often, after he'd counted up the amount of a certain item, he would call out to her a number and item name and she would dutifully record it in the ledger beside the proper entry. They'd been at it for a little over an hour now, Tom working down the shelves away from the counter. Away from Addie.

Addie drummed the fingers of her left hand against the pages of the ledger book as she heavily rested her face in her right hand. She knew it was stupid, what she was feeling, but she couldn't help it; the further Tom moved away from her, the lonelier she felt. And why on earth should that have been? He was literally right there in the room with her--he wasn't even out of sight behind shelves yet! Still, silly as it was, she did feel lonely and there was no denying it. She couldn't reach out and touch him from here, couldn't feel his warmth, couldn't smell his cinnamony cologne that she loved so much. Addie let her gaze fall down to hold on the pretty silver ring on her ring finger. Now she understood what her cousin Bess meant when she spoke of true love: You didn't need to be next to them all the time, but, ye gods, did you ever want to be!

A brilliant idea suddenly came to the young woman's mind that caused her rosy lips to curl. It was a little bit more of a Bess thing to do, but it seemed like it could be fun. And Addie knew Tom wouldn't mind taking a break.

Gently slapping her hand against the ledger, Addie leaned even more heavily on the counter and sighed extra, extra loudly, making sure to make it sound dramatically forlorn. She thought she did a decent job.

It definitely worked, for Tom immediately stopped in his counting of the checkerboards and turned to look at her. "Is everything all right, Sugarplum-bum?" he asked, looking a tad bit concerned.

Addie met his eyes, looking innocently at him. "Yes," she answered.

"Only, that sigh sounded rather sad," Tom gently pressed further, his gentle brown eyes looking her over.

Addie bit back a smile. Bess was a genius! "Well, as it happens, I am just a tad melancholy," she replied, doing her best to keep the corners of her mouth from curving up.

Tom hopped off his ladder and moved towards her, looking even more worried. "Oh, yes? Might I ask why?"

Addie put on her best pout and puppy-dog eyes, and she must have done a commendable job because she could see an entirely new level of softness well up in her beau's eyes. She internally cheered and made a mental note to discuss her triumph with Bess later. "Well, if you must know, Sugarpie, it's because it's been an hour and five minutes since you last told me you loved me."

Surprise, realization, knowing, and playfulness all flashed through Tom's eyes in a wink. It was incredibly impressive, and Addie quietly wondered if that's what Ebenezer looked like whenever Bess pulled this stunt with him. "Oh, my!" Tom gasped, one hand flying up to cover his mouth, the other his heart. "Oh, I am so sorry, Peachfuzz, so very sorry indeed! Allow me to fix my mistake!" He swept behind the counter and wrapped the plump woman up in his arms, squeezing her tight as he spun her around.

Squealing with delight, Addie wrapped her arms around the man's neck. Then she found herself being lifted up and deposited on the countertop. She blushed pink and giggled as Tom came to stand in front of her, moving between her legs. She probably parted them for him a little bit easier than a lady should have, but she didn't care. They were practically married after all.

Wrapping his arms around her again, Tom stared into his love's shining hazel-nut eyes and smiled ever so lovingly and fondly at her. He pressed a kiss to her forehead. "I love you," he murmured. Another kiss to her temple. "I love you." Her other temple. "I love you." He smooched her cute button nose. "I love you." He peppered her cheeks. "IloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyouIloveyou!"

Addie laughed, trying to push him away and duck out of the onslaught. "Tom-Tom, please! That's a little too much!"

"Ah, there's never such a thing as too much love, my sweet!" He kept up the assault of butterfly kisses all over her soft, round face before finally planting his lips on hers. Immediately everything slowed, the rest of the world falling away until they were the only two people in the universe.

Addie slowly slipped her hands up to cup Tom's jaw to hold him closer, her fingers curling around his delightfully prominent ears. She delighted at how the closely cropped curls of his 'chops tickled her palms. His thin 'stache scratched against her top lip just so, sending tingles throughout her body. The woman felt as though she were in her own personal Heaven, one that was filled with nothing but Thomas Aaron Jenkins. Not that there ever had been, but there wasn't a trace of doubt in Addie's mind--this was love. True love. And it was hers. It was theirs.

When the couple finally broke apart, Tom touched his forehead to Addie's and gazed deeply into her hazy eyes. "I love you, Adelaide Kathryn Shaw" he repeated, softly, slowly, with meaning in every letter and syllable. "With every bit of my soul, I love you. You make me the happiest man on Earth, and I will dedicate the rest of my life trying to make you the happiest woman on Earth."

Addie smiled adoringly at the man, his words touching her very soul and bringing the slightest burn of tears to her shining eyes. Growing up she'd always been the silly fat girl--too plump, too loud, too attention-seeking. Boys and young men had never looked at her as something to take seriously, never mind something to love or desire. But now here she was, a grown woman in love with an absolutely wonderful grown man who loved her back with all his might, listened to everything she had to say no matter how goofy, and wanted her to be his wife and mother of his children. Addie had never felt so special. Or so happy. "You do that already, Tom," she replied to the man. "You make me so happy, I hardly know what to do with myself."

Tom smirked. "Well, apparently, you're so happy, you stoop to your delightful cousin's manipulations in order to get a little extra affection out of me."

Addie giggled. "It worked, did it not?"

The swarthy man grinned and shook his head. "You Shaw women," he muttered, booping her nose with a finger, "deviants the lot of you. I've never seen more mischievous females."

"You love us and you know it."

"Yes. Mischievous and irresistible--a dangerous combination. Good thing I'm a man that's always liked a little danger."

Addie laughed as he surged back in to kiss her again.

➽───────────────❥➽───────────────❥

Ebenezer was adding up the family balance book for the month when the door of his study practically flew open. He took a brief second to look up and catch a glimpse of his wife before turning back to his numbers. "Hello, Darling," he greeted her.

With a melodramatic sigh, Bess leaned heavily against the doorpost and pressed the back of her right hand to her head. "Have you no heart, Ebenezer Charles Scrooge?!" she exclaimed, a theatrical vibrato in her voice.

Still adding up the balance, the reformed miser smirked at the woman's dramatics. Bess always claimed she couldn't stand theater, but the woman took such delight in performing melodrama it was hard to believe her. "Well," he answered, "I have a pulse; so judging from that, I believe I have heart--but I haven't been to the doctor for a good while, so I suppose I can't say with certainty."

"No!" Bess wailed, going full Shakespearean. "No, you haven't a heart! How can you?" She pushed off the doorpost and swept into the room. "How can a man profess to have a heart when he hasn't told his adoring and devoted wife 'I love you' since..." she paused and took a deep, shuddering breath, "... since breakfast hours ago! Oh! Oh, the humanity!" The American pressed a hand to her forehead again and the other to her heart and twirled about before "swooning" and collapsing onto the deep rust, chaise lounge across from his desk. She sobbed, stretching a foot dramatically towards the ceiling: "The humanity!"

That caused Ebenezer to roll his eyes and turn away from the balance book to pivot around in his chair and face the actress that was his wife. He smirked amusedly at her. "You never fail to take it up a notch, do you?" he remarked with a snort.

Bess peeked out of the corner of her eye at the silver-haired man and winked with an impish grin, before resuming character. "Oh, the misery! The despair of being a vibrant, vivacious woman trapped in a loveless marriage!"

"Well, you are most certainly a vibrant, vivacious woman, I'll give you that."

"How can I go on? Knowing that the man I love doesn't love me in return--how can I possibly be expected to go on?! Oh, I am a piteous being! A most wretched and lowly soul cast among the broken and downtrodden of this cold, cruel, heartless world! Oh, woe! Woe is me! Woe is me!" Bess threw herself fully across the lounge, leaning far back over the curved headrest so that she was nearly hanging upside down, a hand still pressed to her brow.

The sound of chuckling reached her ears, followed by a book snapping shut. Then there were footsteps lazily crossed the hardwood floor before the door shut. The sound of the lock turning was what caused the woman to snap her eyes open and sit up to look at her husband. The distinguished gentleman stood there beside the door, watching her intently, his eyes dark. A shiver instantly ran up Bess' spine. She watched carefully as he undid his cuffs and deftly rolled up his sleeves, revealing expanses of slender-built forearms covered in attractive salt-and-pepper hair. Defined, wiry muscles flexed beautifully beneath rosy skin, reminding her of the surprising power and strength those otherwise slender arms possessed: The strength to carry her all the way home from the market when she twisted her ankle; the strength to hold her up and pin her to a wall as he rutted into her until she screamed with ecstasy. Bess gulped, looking from Ebenezer's arms up to his leering face. A thrill shot straight through her down to the special space between her thighs that only Ebenezer knew and could affect so markedly. Instinctively she parted her legs a bit.

"Well, now," Ebenezer rumbled as he slowly trod towards her, fiddling with the last few rolls of his left cuff, "it would appear as though I've been a bad husband--neglectful in my duties and leaving my poor, poor wife to suffer for it."

Bess pouted out her bottom lip. "You have been neglectful," she grumped.

"I know, Sweetness."

"Very, very neglectful."

"I know."

"How am I supposed to know that you still love me when you go hours without telling me, Ebenezer?"

"I know, I know, and I'm so sorry, Bess. So very, very sorry." He knelt on the floor before her, (which was quite gallant to do, as he did not have the youngest knees anymore) and gazed up into her face. He smirked and it held a dangerous edge that matched the blackness of his eyes. "As I have been made aware of this... greatest of transgressions," Ebenezer said, his voice soft but dark, "I would very much like to try and alleviate it." He wrapped his arms around the woman's waist and drew her forward to him. "If only you would be so gracious as to let me, Dearest Wife." He trailed a hand languidly down Bess' long leg until he came to the very hem of her skirt. Moving his hand to touch her stockinged ankle, he traced his hand just as slowly back up under her skirt. His long fingers gently pressed into her flesh.

A squeak caught in Bess's throat as a goofy grin spread across her face along with a strawberry blush. Lord, the effect this devilish man had on her--she'd never get over it. And she never wanted to. "I-" she stopped and cleared her throat, "-I believe I could find it within me to be as such." She shivered at the temperature change on her lower legs as her lover slowly pushed her skirt up higher and higher.

Ebenezer smiled wolfishly. "Thank you, my darling. I am undoubtedly married to a saint of a woman." With his free hand, he took up one of hers and kissed her fingers. "I love you." He kissed her knuckles. "I love you." He kissed the back of her hand. "I love you." All the while, his hand beneath her skirt kept on its trek.

Bess tried to steady her breathing and shifted around to allow him more access as he progressed.

Ebenezer was kissing up her arm now, trailing his lips along its length until he reached her shoulder and pressed a firmer kiss there. "I love you," he whispered into her blouse. He turned his face to hers with devilishly glittering eyes and asked, "Is this making things better, my love?"

Bess shuddered a breath and nodded her head, unable to find her voice.

"But not quite enough is it? No, you went hours without hearing an 'I love you' from my lips--a few kisses will not suffice." He moved his head to the center of her chest and pressed a kiss to her clothed sternum, then a trail of them up over her collarbone and the column of her throat.

Bess moaned as his lips gently sucked at her sensitive skin, tilting her head back just slightly. Little twinges of pleasure sparked deep in her belly; heat pooled in her pelvis. How was it possible for anyone to be so good with their mouth all the damn time? She hadn't the time to consider that question as suddenly her man's lips were upon hers, claiming them fully. She leaned into it, tilting her head for a better angle and molding her fully lips to dance with his soft, smooth, slender ones. Without thinking she brought both her hands up to skim his shoulder and clutch at the back of his neck, one hand moving higher to twine into his soft, steely hair. A large hand squeezed her left knee ticklishly, and Bess squealed, allowing Ebenezer the perfect opportunity to plunder her mouth with his tongue. She moaned at the taste of him--he'd sucked on a peppermint recently-- and allowed him to push her deeper into the lounge. Before she knew it, she was lying back with her man stretched atop her and nestled comfortably between her legs. She had no complaints.

Finally, the kiss ended as both parties desperately needed more air than they could find through their nostrils. Hearts racing, lungs heaving, they gazed into each other's lusty, half-lidded eyes. Each party thought the other a spectacular vision with their flushed cheeks and glistening lips. They could have stayed in such a way forever and been content.

"I love you, Elizabeth Felicity Scrooge," Ebenezer rasped, voice as full of adoration and devotion as desire. It warmed Bess' very soul. "I love you so much, I don't believe I could ever voice it effectively to you." The man's lips curled into a delightfully wicked sneer as his once-slate-blue-now-black eyes gleamed with devilry. "Therefore, I believe I shall have to write it out with my tongue and fingers both on and in that delectable little quim of yours."

Bess was sure she could have burned to ashes on the spot with the heat that flared throughout her body. "Ebenezer!" she squeaked incredulously.

A dark, rumbling burr of a chuckle rolled up from deep in the Englishman's chest. "Oh, I love it when you say my name, She-Wolf," he snarled, touching his nose to hers as he glowered seductively into her eyes. He trailed his hand further up her thigh to find it bare and gave it an appreciative squeeze. Its mistress squealed, and he felt his pants grow ever more constrictive. "And I can't wait to hear you scream it again."

Taglist: @rom-e-o @oldmanlusting @the-house-of-auditore-frye @crimson-phantom-designs @purgratoriat @ofvampiirisms

#this was way too much fun #oh the morning is going to kick my ass #it's half-past 1 now! #UGH!!! #WHY do I do this?! #scrooge 2022 #netflix scrooge #ebenezer scrooge #scrooge a christmas carol #scrooge #scrooge x oc #fanfiction #ebenezer x bess #ebeness #tom jenkins #tom jenkins x oc #tom x addie #toddie #scrooge ocs #a christmas carol ocs #bess scrooge #addie shaw #married scrooge #engaged tom #scrooge romance #tom jenkins romance #smutty-ish scrooge #nsfw-ish #Youtube

[bearofohu]

your tags on the lady layton anime poll tell me you didn't exactly enjoy watching it

Personally, i can only agree and i have my reasons for it, but I'm still curious as to why you dislike it?

I don't like it mainly because it's so... obviously made for little kids. In every part of it.

No culprit is actually bad, but rather 99% of them were doing a bad thing for a good reason, which is fine once in a while, but this is the case in literally every single episode, and it gets old quickly. They made a detective/mystery anime with no actual crimes depicted. I mean come on. On top of that, the episodes are so painfully formulaic. The mysteries themselves are interesting enough though, which is probably the only reason why i managed to suffer through it to the end. I also just generally dislike Layton becoming a father. I don't doubt he'd be good at it, but he just doesn't seem like the kind of person who would just adopt a whole ass child. I'm also generally not a fan of "popular character becomes a parent, so their child can continue their legacy". I just hate that trope in general. Children are not their parents and it's unrealistic to expect them to be.

And I'm also not a big fan of the main characters. I could probably write more if i seriously thought about it, but as a whole i can say that i just find them grating. Katrielle is supposedly an "english lady", but we rarely see her acting actually ladylike in the anime. Her interest in sweets is fine enough, but it's so overblown that it's just not believable anymore and instead turns into her only character trait, completely overshadowing her supposed interest in mysteries, which just seems like bad writing. And while the main plot, so to speak, of the whole show is her finding the professor, the only times that even comes up is in the episodes that are exclusively about that. Katrielle isn't really shown to be missing him at all, not even in private, which makes it seem more like she's searching for him out of obligation rather than because she actually wants to. The moments shown of Katrielle and Layton in the past are so few, it just seems like they wanted to do their own thing with the show, but had to slap the Layton brand name onto it for the brand recognition, and i wouldn't be surprised if that was the truth tbh.

Noah, or as the english subs called him, "Ernest" (for whatever reason), is probably my least favourite kind of character. I don't know, maybe it's his character design that makes me dislike him so much. I hate how he's such a huge scaredy cat and that being his one and only sole character trait. Seriously, what other character traits does he have? If you know any, please tell me, because i legit cannot think of any. Well, he does have this one other character trait of having a huge crush on Katrielle, but is unable or unwilling to actually ever act on it, which is a trope that I'm just so tired of. Like, either grow some balls and make a move instead of being passive aggressive to every other potential partner that approaches her, or give up on your crush and grow a personality! I don't care about how "realistic" this kind of thing is supposed to be, it makes for a terrible character. That coupled with his general demeanor just makes him boring as hell. If he was replaced by a lapdog that got carried around in a small purse, i doubt the anime would be much different. His only backstory we get is his two-episode backstory thing, but the whole thing hinges on an initial misunderstanding, or rather, it hinges on everyone else deliberately keeping Noah in the dark. He shows character traits in those episodes that could actually lead to him becoming interesting, but as soon as those are over, he's back to his normal, boring self, which is a huge shame.

Sherl the dog is the classic (and literal, in this case) example of "all bark, no bite". It's never explained why only Katrielle and Noah can understand him, and this fact doesn't matter either, because it's rarely, if ever, called out by other characters. He doesn't have the sense of smell like a typical dog, effectively making him useless. His role is the animal mascott of the agency and anime, the third character to make a trio, and to be the comic relief. That last one is a shame though, because he's not funny at all. Or maybe the whole "yelling at ridiculous character for being ridiculous" thing is just not my thing.

These are my main reasons. There are a few more things I don't like, but those are more nitpicks.

So I know why I don't the anime (and now so do you), but I'm curious as to why you don't like it. Same reasons as me? Completely different?

your reasons are really valid criticisms and i agree with most but mine are actually pretty different

my reasons are probably going to be more based on bias rather than the overall quality of the show bc to be completely honest with you i hate both mystery room & lady layton and think both attempts to “reboot” layton was lazy, uninspired and unnecessary

and if a lot of this makes me sound like an old ass man its bc i am when it comes to layton. my 7 year old ass was playing CV on its release week in the US. im an OG snob to the bone so honestly you should take my beef with LMDA with a grain of salt when it comes to presenting legit critique bc while i do hav legit critique, above all else i have “i just hate this shit”

hino ignored “if it ain’t broke don’t fix it” and for that i never intended to give either spin-off a chance and im not ashamed to admit that this point. i knew i wasnt going to like mystery room when it was announced, but it was so obviously a spin-off that it was very easy to ignore and safely assume it was just an AU type deal

but then shit got personal when i found out LMJ was going to be professor layton’s successor. back in the day when all that hoopla was occurring i always had to back up my complaints by emphasizing its not bc i don’t like the change, its bc of x and bc of y.

but the truth is there was nothing wrong with LMJ in regards to the game they were trying to make. LMJ and by extension LMDA is for kids, marketed towards kids. thats why the puzzles are piss easy. they’re not badly made, they’re for children. the plot isn’t sterile and corny and safe, its for kids.

if LMJ/LMDA were a spinoff i wouldnt have had such a problem with it. but it wasnt. it was supposed to be a successor to layton, but its not a successor, its a total replacement that fails its source material in every possible way

and thats my problem with it. professor layton didn’t need to be remade. it didn’t need to be remade for children. children could stomach the original perfectly fine. the unwound future trauma beat my 8 yr old ass and i came out just fine

there is nothing wrong with LMJ/LMDA if it stayed in its fucking lane. instead hino attempted to replace a franchise with it that was totally and utterly different in every aspect which totally alienated OG fans and completely failed to capture new ones

and i hate LMDA more strongly bc the relic stone arc is such a failure of a professor layton story. it steps all over hershel’s character and makes him such a prideful deadbeat who gladly sends himself and luke to their possible demise for NO fucking reason. if layton knew they were going to get captured by rufus aldebaran’s stupid cult then why the FUCK did he let luke come with him. jesus fucking christ. he would not let that boy walk to his death

..or maybe he would bc of what happened in azran legacy. fuck me. i swear to god everything thats wrong with LMDA i can trace back to azran legacys writing somehow

hershel aside it also shat on any of the impact that we would’ve gotten seeing luke’s growth. LMDA just throws a fucking eeeve stone at him and even then we learn almost fucking nothing about him or his wife or how they met. marina is the only character i found even a little bit interesting due to how fucking hardass it was that she indoctrinated herself into the cult that froze her man for 10 yrs JUST so she could one day save him. but ofc the fandom shat on her when LMDA was airing bc she wasnt luke’s husband (which she is btw. sorry some of u werent woke enough to see that)

hino obv knows by now that the reboot failed in nwos is any indication. and i don’t want to rip on hino bc at the end of the day after azran legacy blew fat stank ass in sales, he was just trying to bring bag back to professor layton. this just wasnt it and hopefully the hype around nwos has showed him the actual way forward for the franchise and if hes swagful enough he’ll just start giving LMJ the flora treatment

but yea this is such my brainshit of thoughts for why i personally hate LMJ/LMDA. hopefully it was even a little bit coherent and ty for giving me a chance to ramble and sharing your own thoughts 💖

#long post #answered #professor layton #lmda

[mthofferings]

Sayah1112

See Sayah1112’s existing works here and here.

Preferred contact methods: Discord: selip Email: [email protected] Tumblr: sayahs-corner

Preferred organizations: - Assistance Dogs International - Center for Reproductive Rights - Médecins San Frontières (Doctors Without Borders) - National Disaster Search Dog Foundation - Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network (RAINN) (See the list of approved organizations here)

Will create works that contain: Alternate Universe, Enemies to Lovers, Dubious Consent, ID porn, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Omegaverse, Powerdynamics are all my jam. I will do those all day, every day. As far as AUs go, I've dabbled in Werewolf, Shifter, A/B/O centric, BDSM, Aliens, Fantasy, College, etc I'm open to most AUs, and I do enjoy a challenge.

Will not create works that contain: I really don't write gore, main character death, or angst without a happy ending (or at least a happy for now). I don't do bodily fluids (scat, watersports, unclean themes/play). For the t-shirt auction, I'm fine with having anything on it as long as it's not racist or inflammatory.

  -- Fic or Other Writing --

Auction ID: 1044

Will create works for the following relationships: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark - 616, MCU Bucky Barnes/Steve Rogers/Tony Stark - 616, MCU Bucky Barnes/Tony Stark - 616, MCU

Work Description: I'm auctioning off a 5k word one-shot for a minimum bid of $15. For every additional $5 I will add another 1k words, maxing out at 15k words. I write mainly Stony romance/smut, but have been known to dabble in Stuckony, and WinterIron. I've also written a Bucky/Steve/Clint one-shot in the past. Basically, if it has Tony in there, I can probably write it. I don't write canon compliant fic, I'm strictly an AU writer. If you have a pairing or AU that you'd like me to write, please feel free to reach out to me. I suck at filling these things out and I'm pretty open to most things. I swear I don't bite. Anymore. :)

Ratings: Mature, Explicit

Can pods bid on this auction? Yes - Podbids welcome!

CLICK HERE TO BID ON THIS WORK

-- Beta Service --

Auction ID: 2030

Will create works for the following relationships: Tony Stark/Any - Any Universe Steve Rogers/Any - Any Universe Bucky Barnes/Any - Any Universe Tony Stark-centric - Any Universe Steve Rogers-centric - Any Universe James "Bucky" Barnes-centric - Any Universe Peter Parker-centric - Any Universe Wade Wilson-centric - Any Universe Clint Barton-centric - Any Universe Bruce Banner-centric - Any Universe

Work Description: I am offering 6 months of Cheer Reading or Alpha Reading for a minimum bid of $10. Let's talk fic! Whether you need someone to keep you motivated, tell you all the juiciest parts of your fic and what makes it great, or you're looking for someone to help you plot and bounce ideas off of, I'm your girl Friday. There's absolutely nothing more I like doing than reading good fic, and plotting. My favorite part is that I don't have to write it! That's your job, my talented author friend. I love me some Stony, Stuckony, or WinterIron BUT HONESTLY - it doesnt matter. I'm happy to read whatever you've written. I'm pretty much down to read everything though I'm mostly familiar with 616, MCU, and the Deadpool movies. I have very little triggers and read mainly M or E rated fics. But again, if you want me to read a nice, fluffy, genfic I have literally no probelm with that. I can be just a cheer reader (no plotting or brain storming sessions needed) or an Alpha reader, or a mix of both. Let me help you in whatever capacity you need for the low, low, price of a $10 donation to a good cause. For the sake of transparency I will admit that what I can't do is grammar. I'm terrible at it (shame, shame) which you may have picked up from this rambling description!

Ratings: Gen, Teen, Mature, Explicit

Can pods bid on this auction? No - I'd rather not be bid on by pods

CLICK HERE TO BID ON THIS WORK

-- Craft or Merchandise --

Auction ID: 3011

Will create works for the following relationships: Avengers fandom any gen and ship - Any Universe X-Men fandom any gen and ship - Any Universe Iron Man fandom any gen and ship - Any Universe Spider-Man fandom any gen and ship - Any Universe Deadpool fandom any gen and ship - Any Universe Captain America fandom any gen and ship - Any Universe Doctor Strange fandom any gen and ship - Any Universe Thor fandom any gen and ship - Any Universe Ant-Man fandom any gen and ship - Any Universe Venom fandom any gen and ship - Any Universe

Work Description: I am auctioning off a custom t-shirt for a minimum bid of $15. Vinyl Colors Available: Black, White, Royal Blue, Grass Green, Cranberry Red, Gold, Glitter Turquoise, Rainbow Shimmer T-shirts: sizes XS - 5XL available. Reach out with your size to discuss color/type of t-shirt. (color and material vary depending on size) >Tier One at $15: You get a custom t-shirt in the size and color of your choice. >Tier Two at $50: You get a custom t-shirt in the size and color of your choice. You will also receive a custom drink coozie with your favorite character's hero logo/catchphrase. >Tier Three at $75: You get TWO custom t-shirt in the size and colors of your choice. You will also receive a custom drink coozie with your favorite character's logo/catchphrase. Things You Should Know Before You Bid: -I will cover up to $10 in shipping, anything after that the winning bidder is responsible for. -I ship from the US -I will be using a cricut to cut heat transfer vinyl and applying it to the shirt of your choice. -Follow the care instructions to get the most life out of your shirt. -I will be washing the t-shirt first using the laundry detergent dujour (usually gain). -This is a cat and dog friendly house. I will try my hardest to keep the dander away from my workspace, but if you have severe allergies this is something to consider before bidding. -Turn around time is dependent upon availability of materials. Some shirt sizes are online order only and will delay production. I will keep you updated every step of the way. Feel free to reach out to me with any design questions BEFORE you bid. I don't do layered vinyl. I also won't make political t-shirts. If you have any questions please feel free to contact me! I don't bite :)

Ratings: Gen

Can pods bid on this auction? No - I'd rather not be bid on by pods

CLICK HERE TO BID ON THIS WORK

The auction runs from October 22 (12 AM ET) to October 28 (11:59:59 PM ET). Visit marveltrumpshate.com during Auction Week to view all of our auctions and to place your bids!

#Sayah1112 #auction: fic #auction: beta #auction: craft #mth 2023

[sapphire-weapon]

what are your thoughts on the horniness and thirst around leon since the remake came out? and all of the content that comes with it (reader inserts, actual animated p0rn etc)? i saw some teens complaining that it was weird and 'ruining the fandom' - but i didn't really think anything of it since, yk, fandoms are gonna fandom, it is what it is (and it's leon so, it's not surprising).

i remember you mentioning that back in 2005, it was very hard for RE fans to talk abt leon outside of his relationship to ada, so i was also wondering how the fandom dealt with general leon-induced horniness back in the day

oh, this might be my favorite ask I've gotten in a while.

/gleefully rubs hands together

First off, teenagers need to shut the fuck up about the fandom. There used to be a time when you'd go into the Resident Evil tag here on Tumblr and you'd get a bunch of weird model viewer porn of Chris banging Dante or someshit. Early RE fandom was filled with a bunch of zombie-on-Jill (and later, Claire) porn. Sometimes it was even zombie dog porn. I don't wanna hear shit about anything porn-related from some fuckin kids who don't know just how depraved this fandom has been. This fandom was built on fucked up porn.

So, in a similar vein, that Leon thirst has always been there. Always, always, always. Do you think that Leon almost overthrew Chris as the face of Resident Evil because fans just... "liked his character"? NO. IT'S BECAUSE WE WANTED TO FUCK HIM. We wanted him in every hole, in every position, and we didn't care what we had to do to get Capcom to give him to us. The only reason why Chris was never dethroned was because the gays circled the wagons around him with RE5's release.

However.

Reader fics and self-inserts are a very new and recent phenomenon in fandom spaces. Even as recently as the mid-2010s, this was something unheard of. Fandom OCs were not okay. If you had a fandom OC, or if the fandom even suspected that you were self-inserting in any way, you got publicly shamed and sometimes even exiled from fandom spaces.

But there was one big, hypocritical problem with that mindset.

If you can't already see where this is going, let me help.

This is the reason why Aeon vs Cleon got as toxic and volatile as it was, back in the day.

Oh, yes. Fans would pick which of the two women they identified with more, and that ship became their vehicle for Leon smut. So, now, it wasn't just a ship. Now, it was personal -- because fans were using Ada or Claire to self-insert in a socially acceptable way. So, if someone rejected Cleon, and you were Team Cleon, chances are, you took that as someone saying "You're not good enough for Leon. You don't deserve him." -- even if you didn't consciously realize that that's what you were doing or how you were perceiving things.

Back in the days of LiveJournal, you found so many fics of just blatant OOC shit, because it wasn't really about Claire or Ada as characters. It never really was. Ada and Claire were just a means to the end goal that was Leon's cock.

So, if nothing else, modern-day fandom is a lot more honest.

Personally? I'll never be interested in reader fics because of how taboo it was for literally my entire life -- I will always see it as cringe, and I will always question that person's grasp on the line between fiction and reality, even though I know consciously that that's not fair for me to do, and that author isn't doing anything that I wasn't thinking about at their age. But prejudices gonna prejudice.

But I'm fucking stoked that I can talk openly about Leon's cock these days, and I don't have to filter it through some fucking ship that I don't care about. I can just sit here and say to you guys -- hey. I think Leon's into edging, and he secretly wants someone to make him beg, but he's too much of a control freak to allow it, so he just makes his partner beg instead. And no one fucking gives a shit!

It's so freeing. I'm so happy.

#resident evil #leon kennedy #honestly i'd talk about leon's cock way more if y'all would just fuckin ask me about it more LMAO

[nobodysdaydreams]

15 questions, 15 mutuals.

Tagged by @mvshortcut @phtalogreenpoison and @emovict0r thanks guys!

Are you named after anyone? - No, my irl name was chosen out of a baby names book. As for Nobody, that was just what I chose because I didn’t think i’d be keeping this blog for long, and @sophieswundergarten eventually called me “Bods” so that is my name now.

When was the last time you cried? Not sure. Maybe a few weeks or months ago? I’ll be honest my memory is not that great.

Do you have any kids? Not yet, maybe in the next 4-10 years.

Do you use sarcasm a lot? Depends on who I’m with. If it’s someone I’m close with then yes.

What's the first you notice about people? - Hm. Interesting question. I don’t really notice people’s outfits, or people in general, I’ll just be honest, but if they express an interest that is similar to mine, they’ll instantly have my attention.

What's your eye colour? - dark brown

Scary movies or happy endings? - happy endings. But when writing myself I prefer angst because I’m a hypocrite. Or maybe I just like my happy endings to be earned first. Who knows?

Any special talents? - I used to do theater when I was in school. My acting is okay. My singing and dancing are atrocious. Yes I’ve had lessons. They didn’t help.

Where were you born? - a hospital in a town in a country

What are your hobbies? - writing fic, reading, daydreaming, dancing to music, and going on walks

Have you got any pets? - No. My partner’s family has an adorable dog I hang out with a lot, but I can’t post a pic because she’s not my dog. Which is a darn shame, because she is the cutest dog in the world. She does look exactly like this emoji though: 🐕‍🦺 just imagine a cuter and friendlier version.

What sports do you play/have you played? - When I was really little I played soccer, tennis, and a season of softball. I was the worst player on every team. This was when I decided to become a theater kid instead. Unfortunately, my singing and dancing were also bad. I did, however, win a prize in middle school at an acting competition.

How tall are you? - around 5’4”

Favourite subject in school? - psychology for sure.

Dream job? - Currently also going down the academia route (I agree with you Milk, it is quite scary). Dream job would be having my research published and making breakthroughs in my field, and if not that then being able to writing original work.

Tagging (no pressure of course!):

So Milk tagged literally almost every mutual I have (maybe not all, but most of them) but if you see this, please take it as an open invitation to participate because this was a fun game and I’d love to hear from you.

#askgame #ask game #Bod’s answers

[spid3namy]

Girlllll I crave nsfw Cartman hcs

Just hear me out!! HEAR ME OUT BABES

YENTL X READER X RABBI CARTMAN NSFW HCS PLEEEEEEASE NO ONE EVER WRITES THAT!!! No one even writes for Yentl and I adore her 💕💕

✶ YENTL + RABBI CARTMAN NSFW HEADCANONS

𓇼 they are def like that one couple where one is OVERLY rough and the other is OVERLY soft

𓇼 cartman is the kinky one. yentl is also kinky but not as much as cartman is

𓇼 during sex, yentl is def the type to like check in on your like every five minutes just to make sure you're okay

𓇼 cartman, on the other hand, doesn't give a fuck. as long as you're not using a safe word, he does NOT give a fuck about what's going on with you

𓇼 yentl def has a mommy kink. call her mommy and she will LITERALLY lose herself.

𓇼 cartman and you both call yentl mommy just cus.

𓇼 cartman enjoys it when yentl pegs him. that's all

𓇼 yentl sometimes like to watch when you and cartman have sex.

𓇼 you are ALWAYS pressed up against the two when having sex. yentl usually takes the front while cartman takes the back. sometimes they switch.

𓇼 yentl is more of the romantic type of lover. cartman is just an asshole (real) and doesn't care.

𓇼 on the OFF occasion, cartman will both you and yentl to fuck him in the ass. only sometimes though. it's to keep his dignity (which he doesn't have)

𓇼 yentl has walked in on you and cartman having sex without her multiple times. she doesn't even get mad though, she kinda just likes watches before leaving to get food and water for the both of you for whenever you get done.

𓇼 cartman oddly likes to watch you and yentl kiss.

𓇼 okay so i know i said cartman was like the kinky one and you would THINK he's the one doing the dirty talk and stuff but no, incorrect. you're stupid if you think that (this is a joke pls don't hate me), yentl does all the degrading and dirty talk. she's actually great at it too.

𓇼 cartman loves leaving marks. he's got that possessive bf energy about him.

𓇼 both have a praise kink. cartman has a degrading kink as well though. you and yentl use that to your advantage every time.

𓇼 yentl is one to cry after cumming. like every single time. without fail.

𓇼 cartman is the one who cleans you both up. during sex, he doesn't give a fuck. but AFTER sex is a totally different thing. he's very kind and considerate after sex.

𓇼 i know yentl and cartman HAVE kids but like BEFORE they existed, he would practically cry and BEG yentl to have his children because you said you didn't want to have children put in your body.

𓇼 ya'll have def gotten caught having sex in public.

𓇼 yentl likes it when you and cartman call her pretty. it makes her feel good. ESPECIALLY if she had bought lingerie to wear for the night.

𓇼 cartman likes to put whipped cream on your body so him and yentl can lick it off. he thinks it's romantic.

𓇼 yentl def puts a collar around your neck if she's in charge. like if cartman is gone for like a church thing or something and you're horny, she'll put a leash on you and make you act like a dog.

𓇼 cartman is into biting. that's all i have to say about that.

𓇼 yentl will wear bright red lipstick to leave marks on both you and cartman. just cus why not.

𓇼 you get spoiled 24/7 by them both. during and after sex, they will def spoil you.

𓇼 cartman likes it when you cry, it makes him even hornier than he was before.

𓇼 yentl likes it when you moan her name or call her mommy. it makes her feel happy and she'll give you kisses for it.

𓇼 there has def been a time when cartman was jealous of yentl being so sweet and kind to you while during sex that he ended up fucking you until you couldn't walk. he had no shame about it either.

𓇼 yentl and cartman sometimes have sex when you're gone. then they tell you about it in full detail when they see you.

𓇼 you three have def fucked in the church that cartman works at just cus you wanted to.

𓇼 yentl is the one who cleans the sheets and clothes off the bed while cartman gives you a bath. you give them both kisses and cuddle with them afterwards.

𓇼 yentl has def accidentally bitten you while giving you head cus cartman was teasing her and she was trying to yell at him.

𓇼 yentl and cartman have angry sex often. with or without you there. it's kinda their thing (cus cartman is annoying sometimes)

𓇼 and after your long night of great sex, you three always fall asleep cuddling. until yentl kicks you both off the bed in the middle of the night.

i was lowkey procrastinating on this but i hope you liked it!! this is the first time i have written headcanons for yentl (lowkey i forgot she even existed) so i'm hoping you enjoyed it babes. if you want more headcanons for south park characters, you know you can ask me and i'll do them for you fr.

#cc is awkward asf #cc don't know what they're doing #south park #south park headcanons #yentl x reader x rabbi cartman headcanons #i need help #mom pick me up im scared #cartman headcanons #yentl headcanons #yentl x reader x cartman

[ladyalicentshightower]

So the dance is *check notes* entirely Alicent's for *check notes again* getting jealous Rhaenyra had pleasurable consensual sex...

Yes, Westeros that famously unpatriarchal, bastard loving, women friendly society would be more than open to Rhaenyra becoming their Queen with her illegitimate heirs even though there are legitimate male heirs present... Oh wait, that's not what Westeros is like.

I'm not going to absolve Alicent of her role because believe me I know she does have a significant one to play but so does Rhaenyra. Every character contributes to the onset of the dance in some way, Alicent especially but also Rhaenyra especially too.

Rhaenyra has made bad political decisions and those decisions, especially in this universe, have consequences. See Robb Stark and the red wedding. I too would risk it all for Harwin Strong but having three sons who are evidently his, is quite literally risking it all. Westeros is a patriarchal society, there are those who believe by right Aegon should be the heir not Rhaenyra. Viserys has done the as yet (in everywhere outside of Dorne) unthinkable by keeping her as heir. As her position wasn't secure, Viserys arranged her marriage to Laenor to stabilize it. As she's had three sons who are clearly not his, it's instead unsettled it further. She's regarded as cuckolding Laenor and disrespecting him by the public (it doesn't matter that they privately have an arrangement, it's all about the wider perception). To the world, she has very publicly shamed her husband, his house, her father who arranged the match and the faith of the seven. There are those who will refuse to bow to her because of that.

She'll continue to make bad political decisions by marrying Daemon (there are those who literally only side with the Greens because they don't want Daemon to rule through Rhaenyra). Daemon reputation and the nature of his wives deaths (he killed Rhea and as he's the only witness to Laena's death there's only room for rumours to grow), doesn't reflect well on Rhaenyra. The fact they're marrying so soon after their spouses' deaths and without permission of the king only adds fuel to that fire. This is a society which routinely shames women for having and enjoying sex especially outside of or prior to their marriage, the rumours of her and Daemon going to the brothel haven't vanish and will always impact her image. Coupled with the rumours surrounding her and Criston's fallout, her relationship with Harwin, her reputation is heavily stained.

Also given how Daemon is perceived due to Rhea Royce's death and how he is widely believed to have killed her and as he did in fact do so, as she was his wife, he committed kinslaying, one of the biggest sins in Westeros and a lot more than just a taboo subject. A curse is said to follow those who commit it, they'll be some who'll whisper what happened to Laena and their unborn child was Daemon's fault due to that curse. We don't know how Laenor's death will go down in the show but it's likely no matter how it goes down, the speed in which Daemon and Rhaenyra marry means they will forever be dogged by rumours. None of this reflects well on Rhaenyra. Her position not just as heir but in the line of succession as a whole is hanging by a thread. It's Viserys who keeps her there.

So long as Alicent's sons are alive, Rhaenyra's reign will never be secure. It doesn't matter if she won't act against them or if none of Alicent's make a claim for the throne, there are those who would refuse to bow to Rhaenyra in their name, who will take up arms against her in their name. She'll have no choice but to cut off any challenge to her succession if she wants to keep her crown. To pretend that everything would've been fine if not for Alicent is to be like Viserys with his head in the sand and choosing to be blind. To pretend all of Alicent's fears are a result of her extreme paranoia alone and that they have no basis in reality and are completely unjustifiable is foolish.

#alicent hightower #hotd #hotd spoilers #house of the dragon #house of the dragon spoilers #the pain of watching robb fuck up politically and die for it over and over again destroys me #we're not even at the war yet and looking back on these characters journeys hurt

[reachingmygoalsss]

Life Update

April 25 2024

Got multiple new jobs, a new apartment and new dogs literally 5 days after the December post. Lost some weight around 15lbs rn! Things are looking up the dogs have helped me relax so so much.

My boyfriend got a new job as a carpenter now and actually stepped up after a fight we had on Valentine's Day. He started trying really hard, and I admit I wasn't the best person during the time because of how hurt and betrayed I felt. I feel a lot of guilt for that, and like I don't fully deserve this new beginning to some extent with him because of how angry I was up until he got the job. I'm really happy for him and thankful too. After all I wouldn't be dating him this long if I didn't love who he is. Stress just gets in the way of that sometimes.

My new dogs are the best little girls! They are German Shepherd lab mixes and are beautiful. Now around 7 months old. I will upload some pictures with this of them! They literally help me so much in my dream realms and through my healing stuff as well as with the transmutation of my emotions. I try to give back as much as I can to them by getting them treats, bones, and things they need or want. I really think I'm gonna try and walk them more, though. It's something I have been lacking with. That and training, and they deserve more of that, so that is a new thing I want to do for them going forward.

I have lots of big plans for the future. I'm going to make a goals list soon, so be hopeful for that. But I think the rest of the post I'm going to rant.

My parents still suck. I don't like how they take everything as me trying to hurt them. It's very frustrating. I'm not going to say I didn't have a lot of hate for them from all the buildup and stuff but I have let go of most of that now. I don't hate them anymore I just don't like them because I realized they will never actually understand me or how I speak.

Something I have been having issues healing lately is feeling like I'm hurting others. Today I talked to my mom for the first time in months and we were having a conversation about my brother since he is in the process of having a kid. Said conversation:

"you know your brother he gets stressed so easily and is nervous"

"that's because you yelled at him for so many years"

"that's because he never would listen unless I yell at him"

"he never was able to hear you because his ears were damaged from you yelling at him"

"I'm not going to let you ruin my day today I'm about to have a grandkid"

"I'm just telling you where that comes from"

✨️conversation ended 2 mins later✨️

This is how every conversation goes and yet I still somehow feel like I'm a dickhead for just stating what I see when she tries to bring stuff up. I feel this way with everyone, either in a state of confusion or guilt and shame for triggering them. I genuinely don't mean to trigger them either I'm just looking at a situation and word vomiting what I see, hear or feel. Sometimes I think I'm autistic because of this. With my mom though I do question if my motives are good. Like is it a subconscious jab at her character? Am I living in the past? Part of me does feel like I am still there in the house a scared kid waiting for her to come in my bedroom and tell me to do some chore or scream at me. During those times my throat feels tight like I'm being strangled and I still can't seem to get the words out clearly. It's hard for me to be in a relationship when there is no relationship because it will always be one-sided. She still wants me to wear the golden child, straight A student, favorite cousin, grandchild, bullshit mask I wore for so long. Perfection mask curated to her, otherwise I'm imperfect, but more importantly she is imperfect. I find myself with traits like her sometimes. Cold and cruel due to insecurities and superficialities. I see how hurt she is too and I guess that's why I still hold so much guilt, shame and hurt for cutting her out. She will never see me. Just like her mother never saw her.

I hope I'm not like her.

My father, I cut off from Jan 1st to early April. It's nice to talk to my dad, and I miss him. The problem is that I usually go into an anxiety attack after I get off the phone with him. Even if the conversation is good, it feels like he invades my whole being, and I have intrusive hate thoughts every time I talk to him that I have to clear out of my head almost every time. He also defends my mom with her behavior, and then he lets her into conversation a lot. Which has put a lot of strain on our relationship in general. I didn't want to have to make him choose between me or mom, but she made that the case a lot of the time. I wish he had the balls to say no to her and just have a relationship with me. I don't expect him to ever stick up for me though at this point. If he defended her to a 5 year old me saying I was the problem at 5 why should I have expected anything different at 22. That's the part I think that hurts the most is still dealing with the same thing younger me dealt with. No one to help me stand up to my bully other than myself.

Good news is I'm an adult now and I no longer feel helpless against them. I can stand up to them and they can't put their shit on me anymore. Though I'm the villain now and that kinda sucks considering I went from being perfect in their eyes. I destroyed their image of everything they saw in me and I feel like myself for the first time but I have no family because of it. I will have to build my own.

Everyone in my family looks at me like I'm an asshole and none of them other than my dad want to see me truly succeed. And even then my dad will try to change my plans or will outright judge or insult them behind my back to my mom. I know this because that's how they all work. Then they get sick or get into a car accident or some shit because they are fucking mean. I don't know why I keep going back. When I disconnect from them I feel so much anxiety, sadness, and hate and it's hard to focus on anything else. I hope there's a day where I can just let go or talk to them without feeling so fucked up. Self harm or self hate maybe? Self sabotage? Layers of bullshit that needs to go. Too much manipulation. Sometimes I wish they would just die so I can move on and get some relief.

I guess the end of this is just me wishing I had a supportive and loving family. One where I don't have to be fake to avoid making people upset or afraid.

#family #therapy #life lessons #update #dogs #weight loss #lifestyle

[lackadaisicallizard]

Ghosted

By lackadaisical_lizard

Demon Black brothers accidentally get summoned and get stuck with Remus and James

Snippet from chapter 2:

Regulus has noticed that Sirius doesn’t seem to care nearly as much as he does about their current predicament. In fact, he seems perfectly content with letting Regulus worry about the semantics while he catches up on everything they’ve missed from Earth since they were last here about fifty years ago. He’s also completely enamoured with James, it seems. Regulus finds him rather annoying himself.

He doesn’t mind Remus’ company honestly. He seems to be actively helping at least, doing his own research and offering up suggestions.

They aren’t having much luck though. For every mildly correct statement about demons out there, there are a hundred incorrect ones. Right now he’s scrolling through a ‘compendium of demons’ that describes the ways they like to perform human sacrifices to both please malevolent deities and create chaos on the mortal planes. He’s sick of people assuming he’s serving some higher power. If Regulus is going to perform a human sacrifice, it’s going to be for himself, thank you very much. He clicks on the next heading ‘symbols and sigils’ and rolls his eyes at the list of symbols that look far more like car logos than anything that could possibly harm an immortal being.

“So they don’t sparkle in the sun then?” James appears to still be on the whole vampire thing. Regulus has never much cared for them himself, vain creatures that they are.

“What? Why would they sparkle in the sun?”

“Oh my God, wait.” James holds up his hand. “Am I about to introduce you to Twilight?”

—

It’s ten o’clock at night and they’re an hour into the third movie about two boys who seem to be allergic to wearing shirts as they brood over the girl with the least amount of personality Regulus has ever seen.

“No don’t say it Bella. Don’t you dare-“

‘Jacob, kiss me. I’m asking you to kiss me.’

“No!” Sirius exclaims, throwing his hands in the air. “It’s emotional manipulation, how do you not see that?” He turns to James. “How does one girl have such bad taste in men?”

James nods. “That’s what I’ve been saying! Remus, tell him that I’ve always said that.”

Remus hums, not looking up from the article on his phone about demonic possession that’s probably riddled with inaccuracies.

“The only thing they’ve got right in this movie is how utterly annoying vampires are to talk to. We get it, you’re mysterious and cryptic.” Sirius shakes his head as he continues to watch both Edward and Jacob act like utter imbeciles.

“Have they got werewolves right at all?”

“Werewolves aren’t real,” Sirius says.

“Seriously? That’s surprising.”

“Really?” Regulus can’t help but chime in here. “You think people can actually turn into dogs just because the sunlight hits the moon in a certain way?”

James furrows his brow. “You say that like there aren’t two literal demons sitting in my living room right now.”

Regulus rolls his eyes but doesn’t say anything. James does kind of have a point.

“It’s a shame they aren’t real, honestly,” Sirius says and Regulus gives him a quizzical look. “What? They’re rather fetching.” He smirks. “Plus they’d be animals in the bedroom.”

Regulus doesn’t miss the way that his brother very deliberately looks at Remus. “I like a man who bites,” he says before turning back to the screen. Regulus also doesn’t miss the way that Remus blinks rapidly and takes a deep breath after he does so.

#marauders #james potter #jegulus #regulus black #sirius black #remus lupin #wolfstar #harry potter #demon Black brothers #James accidentally summons them #they’re stuck on earth #they shit talk twilight #even though I kind of love it #this fic is pure silliness

[fatuismooches]

SMOOOCHES!!! Hiii darling! ૮꒰˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ꒱ა

This isn’t a story but really just me coming on here to talk so I hope you don’t mind! I’m sorry if it’s ever a bother or disturbs you! But I finally finished with all my exploration~! Well, I actually finished on the 10th of July (aka this month) BUT I felt a little shame to just come on here and say that I had finished I was too embarrassed;; but how has everything been? I hope you’re staying fresh in this blazing summer (it’s literally like 115° every single day here it’s unbearable for me and my dog) and also making the most out of it! I’m dreading going back to school in less than a month I’m not ready!!! (Leaks mentioned: ALSO HAVE YOU HEARD OF A SUPPOSED NEW DOTTORE SOUNDTRACK? It sounds so good AND IT MAY BE A CUTSCENE kinda like Kazuha’s friend or Makoto’s in the Archon Quests! I’m really hoping we get more lore on our boo boo Dottore he’s just so interesting!!) I also just recently read a VERY lengthy character analysis on him and oh mygskkd. It really helped me get to understand Dottore as a character and how it disapproves of many misconceptions of himself. (Like being a sadist for ex.) if you ever want the link I can send it since it was on tt. And the day I’m writing this it’s Childe’s birthday, which ironically enough my mom also shared a birthday with him LMAO. (She’s only aware of this bc of how much I dawn over the chars 😭) and to answer your question from one of the recent brainrots I had made “who are you saving up for” I’m actually saving up for Zhongli cons! He’s at C0 rn but in hoping to at least get C2 or C3, but I also won’t be spending my almost 400 wishes on him since I really want a lot of the Fontaine characters, and I’m still hoping for Dottore to become playable soon 😭 (this is me trying to cope) but I hope you have a wonderful day and week!! But before I end this off, can we agree the Dottore pictured in Nahida’s cute story with Wanderer IS ADORABLE?? Like i sometimes just wanna write about the little creature because it’s so cute. Is he ugly? A little but he’s ugly in the cute way!!! I swear I would just want to hug him to sleep. (Many ideas with fragile reader come to mind now LMAO) but anyways !!! I give you so many chu chus n cuddles n a lot of love!! Make sure you’re staying healthy and drinking water in this scorching heat. I give u so many kisses your heart explodes!!! ><

- from your boo boo bear 🎐 anon!! ૮ ྀི◞͈ ˔ ◟͈ ྀིა

🎐 ANON!!! I MISSED YOU AHHH!!!!

It's more than okay i love talking to you!!! And OMF I'M SO PROUD OF YOU!! I know it was such a grind and probably a bit exhausting at times but I'm so proud of you 😌💖 Giving you lots of kithes and hugs!! Mwahhhh!!

115 DEGREES??? HOLY- I thought it was hot where I live 😭 I'm barely surviving like every other summer but omg I'm so sorry 😭 And you have a dog?? How cute! What type of dog do you have, if i may ask?🥰 Though i have been unproductive all summer unfortunately, the heat makes me not want to do anything haha

AND YESSSS IVE SEEN THE LEAKED OST MY EYES POPPED OPEN AT THE POSSIBLE DOTTORE APPEARANCE 👁 IM SO EXCITED I WANT HIM IN FONTAINE BADLY!! Also i think I've read the same character analysis on tiktok like you, was it called "Sadist or Scientist" and had many many slides? With the character and design analysis? If yes i too read it and it was so good! I love seeing analysis on him especially since there are not much crumbs on him. Oh and happy belated birthday to your mom! I hope you had fun with her!💖

Omg almost 400 wishes??? I havent had that much since the time I've saved for Wanderer 👏 I really hope you get lots of cons for him! I also love Zhongli sm but that man has avoided me on all three banners. First banner i didn't have enough primos and missed him, second banner i lost to Qiqi, third banner i lost to Jean lol. I forgot he is coming so i will try to get him again for the fourth time 🤣 Manifesting hard for you 💖🙏 (Dw I'm also coping on playable Dot😭😭)

AND YESSS OMG I LOVE THE LIL STRANGE DOT CREATURE SO MUCH. I need someone to make a good quality plushie of that creature so i can cuddle it 🥺 HYV was probably intending to make the creature look unsettling, but nah, i wholly think it's adorable. I would hold its little hand. (Always ready to listen to your fragile reader ideas tho 😌🤞)

Hehe I'm giving you lots of more cuddles and kisses!! 🫂 I hope you're staying hydrated as well!! We shall get through this heat together 💪 Smooch smooch !! <33

#smooches talks #🎐 anon #one day... one day there will be a genshin character with the same bday as me #omg but yea i freaking despise summer ugh #im a cold weather girlie 💖 #SMOOCHING U HARD 🎐 ANON ILYYSMMM

[sllowshow]

🏡 + aaron (maybe a comparison across au)...

also getting thrown under a cut bc its a long one

i think in a lot of ways, aaron has the relationship with mycah he had always feared having with his child, because it's closest to what he had with his dad. he definitely makes more of an effort to reach out to her than his dad ever did, but she lives a good distance away with whitney, whom i don't imagine he has a good relationship with after they broke up, and he only sees her a few times a year, just because he stays so busy at home with skye et al. he really resents that he let that happen, and is kind of awkward the times she does come to stay with them because of it. and all of that shame is made worse by the fact that he gets to see skye and wyatt continue to coparent up close, and how they manage to keep on top of that even though they went on to have like 3-4 kids with their next partners.

that all being said, i think his girls with skye do get the best version of him. when he met skye, there was so much about her situation that freaked him the fuck out, but he was obsessed with her so he kept plunging ahead. it was good for him to get thrown out of his comfort zone in the end. he didn't think he could be a good dad or a good partner but somehow, skye brought out the best of him and kept him motivated to keep trying and their relationship created an aaron his friends would be surprised to see, but i think ultimately, that is him living the dream: his white picket fence fantasy with his sexy fun wife and their gorgeous blonde daughters. that is aaron's ultimate fourth of july barbecue verse. i imagine these girls to be like. more involved joiners that give him like reasons to be at the high school football games hooting and hollering or like bragging about them via bumper stickers on his truck. like those are his little babies. even when they're doing things like getting teen pregnant and having babies out of nowhere with ezra hanna. i think he did have a hard time stepping in and finding his place with hazel, wilder, and reilly at first, because he just did not know entirely what his role was there besides guy banging your mom, but i think eventually he found his footing with them, once he realized it's literally not his job to be their dad, and he really can just be like a guy who goofs around with them or is another ear to listen if they have something going on. i also think they have a gorgeous blonde dog. that's something that matters to me.

i think his having kids was less intentional with bristol. i think without mycah and without her already having children, just in general, he went into their relationship with no expectations, and had a harder time settling into the idea of him being someone with like a wife and kids, because he would have settled for bristol being his sexy cougar common law partner. he was scared shitless when she got pregnant but i think that all changed once sienna was actually born. and from their, he was a lot more intentional in like his relationship with bristol and having noa. i imagine these girls giving him more of a run for their money, and just in general having less of like a picturesque small town family, but i don't think he would wish for anything more. they have their mommy's spirit which is ultimately something he loves so much about her, so he can't be too mad even if it keeps him up at night worrying they're gonna get mixed up in something that takes it too far, because he knows bristol has experienced that too because of her energy. i think at the end of the day tho ultimately, aaron spent so long believing he wouldn't have anything in the way of a family as an adult (figured he'd just be like austin's kids fun uncle, continuing his trend of just showing up at hanna family events) that in each and every verse, he is so grateful for what he does have. like if he has a partner or if he has kids that's just a huge score and he's not gonna ask questions or sit around wishing for more.

and on that note, i think his relationship with hadley and their boys is a more complicated one. because everything is so close to clicking but it's just one step off. again, i think i'd say ultimately he is satisfied and grateful for the family he has here, but i think he feels like a worse match for them and like. lacks the confidence in himself that he has in other universes. like he's practically classic sitcom dad for his girls with skye but here he just always feel like he's missing the mark. he loves hadley, but they're together for the wrong reasons, and that leads to some conflict. i think he'd be someone who would try his hardest to stay together for the kids though and just take the most of the good times he can get, he's just going for more late night drives to shake stuff off here. and he loves his boys but he definitely feels more of like a pressure in parenting them. like he knows his dad did a fucking number on him and he feels like he just has to be very careful about not passing that same shit onto them. he wants to raise boys that know better than him and don't have to grow up to unpack the same shit he had to work through, and he feels way less equipped to do that than he does like. raising girls who are confident and assured enough to not get in relationships with guys that aren't worth them. that being said, i think he does love having sons to like watch the big Game with or like zeke at least i imagine coming to work for the family business and again he wouldn't change his life if he could. it's just that internally i think he feels like more of a fuck up and less like he's right where he needs to be.

probably regency bias because again i know he has the most fulfilled life in other places, but eli verse is currently the one that drives me most insane for him. because he's so close to having it all. rory came back to carina with ryan cosmically humbled by everything that had happened with micah. she'd dropped out of school and finished a paralegal's degree online, she had a daughter she didn't know if she was ready to take care of with someone she felt so ashamed to keep coparenting with knowing what she'd done to him. i think at her core she's still her same rory self but she's less outwardly pretentious because well what ground does she have to stand on. but this isn't about her its about aaron, who had never paid rory much mind beyond her being aaron's pesky kid sister. he liked her, but as established, definitely had a crush on aubrey and just did not see rory that way at all. but they were hanging out at the same dive bar and what can i say they're both just charming mother fuckers. i imagine them like playing pool and bantering and just coming to an agreement that rory trusted him enough to do no strings with him in a way that wouldn't like mess with ryan as much as her trying to seriously date or anything. he'd come over mostly when she was with micah anyway, and whenever he was around her, he was a family friend she already knew and knew would like play with her and be cool and wasn't just some strange guy mom was fucking. i think by the time she got pregnant with eli, they were already getting dangerously close to playing house sometimes, but that made it way too real. aaron felt a pressure to be a man and step up and try to get involved for real at that point, and rory respected that, so it worked for a while. he was her boyfriend proper for a few years when she was pregnant/when eli was little, and they really gave it a good run, and tried to do like cute family zoo date shit and he put work into trying to have some relationship with micah because if he's here to stay that'd be important. i think aaron wanted to propose to her but rory dumped him before he had a chance to do it (thank god). i think from here rory largely becomes his one who got away, unlike micah he doesn't find a next thing, he just kind of goes back to his old ways because he feels like this just affirms what he'd always believed about himself. the one difference is he knows he's a good dad, because he loves eli more than anything in the entire world. and he doesn't let the fact that stuff with rory didn't work out discourage him, because eli's more important than any of that. plus, at the end of the day, the hannas are his family. even without eli, he'd keep showing up at thanksgiving and christmas, so he and rory learned to coexist pretty well. i think they have an overall positive relationship now, but there's still some tension, and a curiosity of what might have been from both parties, but they know it would complicate everything else too much to ever find out, so they just leave it as is. that's how you know how dedicated to this he is, it's one of the few relationships he refuses to let sex complicate.

#this is entirely too long but also feels like i've said nothing. idk

[the-ghost-in-your-curtains]

Rory Keaner is the pinnacle of My Type™️ and he is the best character that ever has and ever will be created.

He gets so excited about everything, literal dog energy

Very gullible, he's just a himbo. No thought brain empty only squirrel

The fuckin thing where he just starts floating when he's in love/really happy?

He uses super speed for everything and I think that's hilarious. Vampire Ninja at it's finest. (Added bonus: people/vampires being freaked at his speed and timing is hilarious)

The implications behind his use of being vampirized. He chooses to eat primarily small animals (squirrels) and instead of malicious intent, he has trickster energy. Man just wants to have fun with his friends, and he can do so much more all the time now. His increased durability and immortality is used to do Epic Pranks and fuck around. That's lovely.

He really just wants to help his friends and hang out. When they were hijacking the evil vampire car, his full intent was to help Ethan by removing him from the situation. This is made prevalent throughout the series, with him constantly trying to assist his friends and just hang out.

Even though he's really dumb, I refuse to believe he's not that gullible. I like to believe he knows he's being manipulated or lied to. He chooses to ignore it because he sees the best in people and loves his friends. If that means being comic relief, the punching bag for insults, and constantly blamed for shit, that's fine. (Or he's just a hugh-tier himbo, either is good)

He's the cause of (or escalator) of many issues and shenanigans throughout the series. But nothing's ever done with ill intent, he does things and caused things but he always tries to fix them. (Like when he accidentally created a super-species of jock alligator that started breeding and murdering people everywhere, he just wanted to raise his Floridian iguanas)

He's so forward it's embarrassing to watch but incredibly charming. He calls every girl he sees babe and shills so hard all the time. He gets new crushes every other day, but never breaks a heart. (Probably because I don't think anyone genuinely liked him back the entire series.)

When he gets anywhere with any crush he does the floating thing, which is just adorable. Occasionally he also flashes his fangs on accident, (it's a miracle that he hasn't been staked through the heart yet.) But he does it out of happiness and I love that

He openly enjoys things, like his favorite bands and movies. He has no shame in expressing his emotions or thoughts. (Which gets him in trouble but it's alright)

I cannot stress how kind he is, he always jumps in to help when he can, and can barely take a hint. (I'm thinking of the werewolf jock episode here, the "garlic and tanning bed convention" excuse hurt me in my soul) But despite this very clear "fuck off", he jumps in to save his friends with zero hesitation.

Thank you for listening, Rory Keaner is amazing.

#not to shill on main but he's fucking adorable #rory keaner #is the most kindest himboest man ever. i love him so much #i just watched all of the my baby sitters a vampire tv show and im reeling #ghost whispers to the void