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jenanigans1207 · 2 years

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You Felt Like Mine |BakuDeku| |3| FINAL

Things change almost immediately.

Almost, because when Izuku invites Katsuki to stay the night again, Katsuki hesitates for about five whole seconds. Five whole seconds in which Izuku has time to realize that he may have pushed too far, the expression on his face falling as he rushes to explain to Katsuki that there’s no pressure and if this isn’t something they used to do—

Katsuki cuts him off with a gruff agreement to stay the night and then he has to fight off the flush in his cheeks as delight lights up Izuku’s features instead. It’s not what they used to do, not unless they got off patrol late and had to be up early and one of their flats was just too fucking far away to bother walking the extra distance. It wasn’t even something they talked about doing because Katsuki had considered recommending it once, when they’d had the day off the next day and Izuku had looked dead on his feet as he’d stumbled out of the office and onto the street but Katsuki’s throat had started to get suspiciously tight as he considered breathing the words into existence and in the end, he hadn’t been able to do it. Izuku, true to fashion, never mentioned it, probably because he assumed it was some line of Katsuki’s that he was trying not to cross.

It was something Katsuki had thought about, though. That he couldn’t deny.

It was even something he’d wanted.

So when Izuku had asked him to stay, right there on the rooftop where Katsuki had laid himself bare, admitted to the ghosts of his past that haunted him to this day, he’d only hesitated for five seconds. In the past, he would’ve hesitated for so long it would’ve become awkward or he would’ve shut the idea down before the words had even gotten all the way off Izuku’s lips. But those five seconds were just long enough for him to have an internal battle, just long enough for him to come to a decision.

He was going to fucking try.

It was the scariest decision he had ever made in his entire goddamn life, but it was the right one and he could feel that to the very core of his bones. He still had a lot of things he had to face down, a lot of things to accept, but he was finally ready— as ready as he was ever going to be, at least— to start. The first thing he had accepted: the fact that he wanted Izuku to remember him again. It was an unshakeable fact, a core of who he was. Katsuki genuinely could not picture what his future would look like if it were suddenly lacking green.

So he was going to fucking try. He was going to get his head out of his ass and stop pushing Izuku away. He was going to learn how to put his feelings into words and he was going to be the kind of person Izuku deserved to fall in love with. Well, okay, he wouldn’t go that far. He wasn’t going to stop calling Izuku out for being a damn nerd or teasing him relentlessly when he asked for a hero’s signature and then got flustered when they asked for his in return.

(It was like Izuku constantly forgot he was the number one hero, that he lead the hero world and had thousands upon thousands of people looking up to him and admiring him. He would turn beet red and start to stammer out some flustered response whenever someone asked for his autograph in return. Katsuki would never, not until the day he died, let Izuku live that one down).

Truthfully, he didn’t think he was capable of being the person Izuku deserved, but for some god forsaken reason he was the person Izuku wanted and he was going to stop taking that for granted.

So he agreed when izuku asked him to stay the night. And he curled up in bed next to izuku again, the TV droning on as it trudged through some hero documentary that neither of them were paying attention to. Izuku, for all that he had just learned about their past on the roof, didn’t seem put out by the situation at all. He chatted away next to Katsuki, forever filling the silence the way he always had. And when he’d started to nod off, his eyes slipping closed for longer and longer periods of time, Katsuki would kick his shins and threaten him with certain death if he dared fall asleep before the boring ass documentary that he picked ended. And Izuku would laugh, soft around the edges with the sleep that was swirling around him, trying to pull him under.

Somewhere in there, they both fell asleep. Katsuki can’t say when, but he knows that he’s awake now, the light slanting through the partially closed blinds of the window just over Katsuki’s head. He squints against it, the sky still a dusky sort of blue that hasn’t finished bleeding into the golden tones of the morning yet. He shifts, trying to get comfortable. If they’re on leave until further notice, Katsuki is going to make the most of this time and get some goddamn sleep that he’s been missing out on. And that means that he’s absolutely not about to get up before the sun does.

But then he flips over onto his side and comes face to face with a messy set of green curls and everything that is happening comes crashing down around him as the haze of sleep seems to slip between his fingers all at once.

His initial response is somewhere between fear and panic and it’s a miracle that he keeps himself from scrambling out of bed and sprinting for the door. His next response is freezing in place, eyes locked on Izuku and the way his chest is rising and falling softly with the gentle breathing of a deep sleep. His eyelashes flutter against his cheeks, just over the freckles that Katsuki has looked at far too many times. Up close like this, Izuku has even more freckles that Katsuki had realized and he has a moment where he considers tracing the damn things, drawing out constellations against Izuku’s round cheeks just to see what the universe would look like according to Izuku.

That thought slaps him in the face, even colder than climbing out from under the warm covers on a cold winter day. Katsuki bristles at his own thoughts, slamming his eyes shut and trying to slow his breathing down through sheer force of will. He had said that he was going to try, but he wasn’t about to suddenly become a damn schoolgirl, fawning over her crush and losing her ability to form a single coherent sentence.

This was Izuku. Katsuki had known the bastard since they’d both been in diapers. He’d seen Izuku go through his awkward teenage phase, had seen Izuku move into and then never get out of his nerdy phase. He was there when Izuku cried because the box of All Might cereal that he had bought came with an All Might figurine that he already had instead of one of the other ones he was trying to add to his collection. He was also there when Izuku had fought the slime villain for him, tears streaming down his cheeks as he tried desperately to save Katsuki. He was there the first time Izuku broke a bone of natural causes as well as the first time he broke one because of his quirk. (He was also there for the second, third, fourth, five hundredth time he broke a bone because of his quirk and subsequently, he was there for damn near every lecture Recovery Girl gave Izuku as he sat bandaged and bruised in her hospital bed, smiling sheepishly at her like he hadn’t just done something stupidly reckless and scared them all half to death).

It should be impossible for him to feel nervous or anxious around Izuku. For all that he had been there through every phase of Izuku’s life, begrudgingly or not, Izuku had been there through every phase of his life, too. Izuku had been there through the good and the bad times and he’d even been there through the times that were so bad, Katsuki didn’t even know how to label them. It wasn’t the first time he found himself lamenting about the fact that he couldn’t push Izuku away no matter how fucking hard he tried, but it was the first time he found himself doing it while studying the way Izuku’s curls fell against his white pillow case, the way the sun made him glow like he had a halo.

Katsuki isn’t actually sure when he’d opened his eyes again, but he found himself staring at Izuku again as he thought, heart in his throat and fears wrapped around the base of his spine like barbs so he could feel them every time he moved. This thing between them wasn’t delicate or fragile, it wasn’t a tenuous relationship like it used to be. They had been partners for years by now, from their second year in UA all the way to topping the hero charts, they were in everything they did together. And they were in this together, too.

“Kacchan?” Izuku stirs, blinking his green eyes open and squinting into the light that’s falling across his cheeks in intricate patterns. “Why are you awake?”

Katsuki isn’t honestly sure what woke him up in the first place, whether it was the light through the blinds or something else entirely. All he knows is that Izuku had just woken to Katsuki staring at him and now his cheeks were flaming red as he flipped stubbornly on his back and pulled the covers all the way up to his chin. “You were talking in your sleep again, nerd,”

Whether he had been or not, Katsuki wasn’t sure, but it was a habit that Izuku’d had their entire lives so it was enough for him to cling to now. It was better than admitting that he’d been watching Izuku sleep and thinking about their relationship. Because Katsuki may have made a promise to himself that he would try but he wasn’t fucking self-sacrificial enough to admit something like that.

“Oh,” Izuku smiles sleepily up at him. “Sorry.”

Katsuki raises his shoulders in a shrug, steadfastly ignoring Izuku.

They’re silent for a long moment and Katsuki is just about to breathe a sigh of relief as he thinks Izuku has fallen back asleep when Izuku murmurs a quiet, ‘Hey, Kacchan?” When Katsuki finally turns his head to look at him, he adds. “You have terrible bed head in the morning.”

His laughter is drowned out by the pillow that Katsuki smashes over his face.

--x

Maybe it’s all in Izuku’s head, but it feels like the world has shifted onto some other axis since the accident caused him to lose his memories.

And maybe he can’t really say that because it’s impossible to remember what the world was like before and even though Katsuki spends nearly every waking moment at his side pretending he isn’t staring at Izuku, isn’t analyzing every move he makes and holding his breath every time Izuku pauses as if there’s some faint bell of recognition ringing in the back of his mind, there’s still a part of him that feels like it’s missing. Or maybe it’s a part of him that feels like it doesn’t fit in with the rest of him. Because Katsuki had told him a little more about their past over the next few days, had told him more about the times they had stood against each other in a battle instead of side by side, he’d told him about how they’d had to reconcile years of turbulence into what they had now. And those things didn’t fit in with the picture Izuku had in his mind currently, and they certainly didn’t fit in with the version of Katsuki that was constantly trailing him home at night, only going back to his own flat here or there just to get a change of clothes or not overwhelm Izuku.

Those things didn’t fit with the version of Katsuki that cooked for him and argued with him good-naturedly, that called him a nerd in a way that was clearly more fond than anything else.

But it was so clear in the way Katsuki was tormented as he talked to Izuku, so clear in the harsh lines of tension in his shoulders, the way his breathing would change— everything he told Izuku about their past was absolutely true. And it was also clear that owning up to it, facing it as he told Izuku about their worst moments was his way of trying to overcome it to some extent. And then when he was done retelling whatever bad memory he had decided to share that day, he would pause, head bowed, as if waiting for Izuku to strike some final blow. And Izuku would remind him for thirtieth, fortieth, fiftieth time that he didn’t hate Katsuki, that he wasn’t going to hate Katsuki no matter what he found out about their past, and all the tension would drain out of Katsuki in one relieved sigh.

During all of this mess they had continued to show up to the agency, reporting to their boss before reporting to their daily training. Katsuki continued to grumble under his breath— or more audibly as they days went on, no longer caring who heard— about what a waste of time it was, but nobody who heard him seemed to pay it any mind except for Izuku who would simply send an exasperated glance Katsuki’s way and shake his head fondly.

Most impressively, though, is perhaps the fact that through the first few days after Izuku lost his memories, there were no big villain attacks. It was as if the entire world had paused to allow him and Katsuki the time away to try and sort this out. There were minor attacks— small things like robberies and break-ins— but those were lett to the other heroes while Katsuki and Izuku were put on leave.

Katsuki, of course, was furious about this. “It’s not like the bastards have ever cared about convenience before.” He’s complaining as they walk through the city streets, both dressed down in street clothes to try and avoid anyone recognizing them. The official story was that Katsuki had gone to join Deku on the follow up work he was supposedly doing, which was why they hadn’t been called to any scenes around the city. “But suddenly they have all this courtesy to just fuck off and leave us alone because you lost your memories.”

“I always knew I was the villains favorite.” Izuku teases as he bumps shoulders with Katsuki, shooting him a grin. “It must be hard knowing that you’re #2 to the villains, too.”

Before Izuku can even react, Katsuki has reached out and whacked him on the arm, startling a laugh out of Izuku as he turns to look up at him. “We’re both #1, you asshole. If it weren’t for me, you wouldn’t be #1.”

“But if it weren’t for me, you wouldn’t be either.” Izuku reminds him. “And since the villains clearly like me more since they’re so respectful of my recovery, I think that bumps me up to first place.”

“Even without your memories you’re such a shit.” Katsuki grumbles. “You never grew out of that, you know. You’re just as annoying as you were when we were kids, now you’re just, like, four inches taller.”

“Hey!” Izuku swats back at Katsuki who dodges much more successfully than Izuku had. “I’m not that short!”

And really, he’s only two, maybe three inches shorter than Katsuki, but that doesn’t do anything to stop the sharp grin from stretching across Katsuki’s lips as he goes out of his way to prop his elbow up on Izuku’s shoulder, raising a challenging eyebrow as he does so. Izuku huffs, pulling away and Katsuki laughs as he goes, clearly feeling victorious. Izuku sends him a glare over his shoulder as he speeds up and tries not to think to much about the warmth he can still feel lingering in his shoulder, burning straight to the core of his bones, tendrils of it reaching for his heart.

“Would if make you happy if I wrote to my villain friends and told them you were bored? I could ask them to stir up some trouble just for you.” Izuku says as Katsuki lengthens his stride to easily catch up and fall back into step with him.

“It would get us taken off of leave.” Katsuki answers, glancing sidelong at Izuku and Izuku refuses to look too closely but he swears there’s a hint of pink across Katsuki’s cheeks as well. “If there was actually something happening, there’d be no excuse not to call us in. Our teamwork is fine and we are the best.”

“You know,” Izuku pauses at a stop light, turning so his back is to the street and he’s facing Katsuki head on. “You seem like the type to bitch about having too much work. But now that you’ve been handed a vacation— paid, I might add, since we still have to go to headquarters every day for an hour— you’re bitching about not having enough to do.”

The look on Katsuki’s face is one that Izuku wants to memorize the moment he sees it because it’s equal parts shocked and impressed and he’s got half of a disbelieving smile on the edge of his lips as his eyebrows rise towards his hairline. There’s a hint of amusement mixed in there and the entire expression is endearing in a way that tugs pretty firmly on Izuku’s heartstrings.

“Sometimes I think you never lost your memories and you’re just fucking with me.” Katsuki says on the tail end of a breathless huff of a laugh.

The light turns and Katsuki starts moving, his fingers gripping Izuku’s shoulder briefly to turn him around as he passes, only letting go once Izuku has fallen back into proper step at his side. Izuku tries not to mourn the loss of Katsuki’s touch for the second time but he feels something wrench in his gut as he watches Katsuki’s hand fall to his side instead. For a brief moment, he’s seized with the desire to reach out and grab it, to hold it between his own and never let go, but he knows that would be crossing an already fragile line. Not to mention the fact that they’re in public and not even supposed to be in the city at the moment. They were already playing a dangerous game just by going out for a bit of fresh air and a change of pace.

So he tries to distract himself from the idea instead by drawing himself back to the conversation that they’d been having. “So you admit that you do complain about having too much work?”

“Who doesn’t?” Katsuki replies easily. “I know your ass sure does. Every time you have more than two pieces of paperwork to fill out, I hear about for days.”

The mention of paperwork brings Izuku to an abrupt stop about two-thirds of the way across the street. Katsuki makes it all of two and a half more steps before realizing that Izuku has stopped, turning on him with a gaze that’s both concerned and worried.

“I didn’t fill out any paperwork after this happened.” Izuku says, gesturing broadly to himself as if that should explain everything.

And to Katsuki, it does. “I filled it out.”

The shock of that simple statement roots Izuku further to his spot. “You did?”

“Just—“ Katsuki reaches for him again and this time, Izuku finds himself leaning towards Katsuki instinctively, as if he’s longing for the touch before he even knows exactly what it’s going to be. “Get out of the street, idiot.”

Katsuki’s hand finds Izuku’s forearm and gives him a tug that’s just rough enough to uproot Izuku from the shock that was holding him in place. He stumbles a few steps until he manages to get his feet underneath him enough to finish getting out of the street, pausing again almost the moment his feet hit the sidewalk on the other side. Katsuki stops, too, his hand still secure on Izuku as he turns to look at him, almost bewildered as to why this has suddenly become something so important to Izuku.

“You filled out all my paperwork?” Izuku repeats, staring intently at Katsuki’s face.

The paperwork they have to fill out if injured on the job is the biggest pain of all the paperwork they have. It’s somewhere in the vicinity of 3-5 pages depending on how severe the injury and what kind of medical care was needed for it and it requires a very detailed recounting of exactly what happened. It’s straightforward, but it’s tedious and Izuku with his tendency to break bones— though significantly less now as an adult, thank god— has filled it out more times than he can count. If there’s any paperwork he consistently complains about having to till out, it’s that because by the time he gets handed the stack of papers, he’s dead tired, injured and usually just short of being cranky from everything he’s been through and being handed the most tedious paperwork he’s ever had the misfortune of being tasked with is the last thing he could possibly want.

“Do you remember what happened to you?” Katsuki challenges.

Izuku falters for a moment. “No,” he admits.

“No,” Katsuki repeats more firmly, but it’s not unkind. “Because I was there. So you don’t remember the accident at all, do you?” Izuku glances down at their feet before shaking his head. “So how the hell were you supposed to fill out paperwork when you can’t answer a single question on it?”

“But there’s a spot for that.” And there is, because memory loss quirks exist. It’s not like Izuku is the first person to ever get hit with one in the history of the world. It’s not like this is even the first time he’s had some of his memories erased, though in the past it was always a much more direct reversal than this.

The point was that there existed a spot on the paperwork where they could explain that it was a memory loss quirk and that they had no recollection of what happened. It existed and Izuku could’ve used it. It would’ve gotten them both out of filling out the majority of the paperwork, honestly.

But there’s something so tender about the idea that Katsuki filled it out for him, even if he can’t really put into words why. There’s something about it that makes his heart ache in his chest while Katsuki continues to loosely hold his wrist, looking vaguely in Izuku’s direction without looking at Izuku as they talk about this.

“I was just—“ Katsuki hesitates in the middle of his sentence, drops his voice as if he hopes that the hustle and bustle of the city will swallow up the last few words and Izuku won’t hear them. “Trying to help.”

It takes Izuku a moment to gather himself enough to reply to that, knowing that Katsuki won’t like if he makes a big deal out of it, knowing that this is Katsuki trying, just like he promised he would. The least Izuku could do was not make it harder on him. “Thanks, Kacchan. I appreciate that.”

Finally, Katsuki takes his hand back and shoves both of them into his pockets. “Didn’t want to listen to you complain about not having memories and filling out paperwork.”

Izuku laughs, his heart overflowing in his chest and he knows with absolute certainty in that moment that he’s on the absolute precipice and even the gentlest of breezes will push him over, will send him tumbling head-first back down into the love every part of him but his brain remembers so well.

--x

This time, Katsuki can see it.

It takes him a few days to realize that he sees it because, besides some questions here and there, it’s remarkably easy to forget that Izuku has lost his memories. He’s exactly the same person he’s always been and the way he interacts with Katsuki is much the same, too. He has the same stupid sense of humor, teases Katsuki in the same way that he always has. He doesn’t let Katsuki get away with anything, scolding him when he starts complaining too loudly in front of their boss only to shoot him a smile behind their boss’ back later. Sometimes he does make offhand statements or put things more bluntly than he would have in the past, but Katsuki is either getting used to it or it’s happening less frequently because he isn’t being thrown for a loop quite as much as he had been in the beginning.

But then there’s the little things— the things he pretended he didn’t see before, the signs he overlooked. It was the little things like Izuku’s shoulder brushing his when they were walking down the street because they were close enough to touch, the things like Izuku staying above him, smiling brighter than the sun, for a few seconds too long after he successfully pinned Katsuki to the ground during a spar. It was the way Izuku would reach for him casually, would lean into his space without even thinking about it. There were little signs that Izuku’s feelings were changing— changing? Or going back to what they had been? Whatever it was officially considered, it made Katsuki feel both excited and sick to his stomach at the same time and he didn’t know what to do about it.

He had vowed not to run and he was doing a remarkable job of keeping that promise, but running hadn’t become any less appealing as the days bled on. With each moment he realized that Izuku was getting closer to falling in love with him again, with each time he found himself reaching back to Izuku before he could realize it and stop himself, he found himself wanting to bolt. Change was terrifying, Katsuki had always known that. Change was something he hated, something he liked to avoid— especially when that change had the potential to permanently ruin everything between him and the most important person in his life.

Even if that change also had the potential to bring all of Katsuki’s wildest dreams to life.

“Will you please just admit that you’re in love with him?” Eijiro asks, waving a hand in front of Katsuki’s face to snap him back to the present moment.

When Katsuki had realized that there were signs, that there had always been signs that everyone except him had seen, he had gone back to Eijiro for one final swift kick and a stern reminder that he was on the cusp of something and that his only choice was to jump.

“Fuck no.” Katsuki snaps, blinking as he tries to focus on Eijiro across the booth from him.

“Come on, man!” Eijiro huffs, leaning back in his seat and crossing his arms over his chest. Their food hasn’t come yet but neither of them are in a particular rush and Eijiro had been chomping at the bit to talk about Izuku the moment they had crossed paths outside the cafe door. He’d somehow managed to keep it together until they were seated and had ordered, but the literal moment their server walked away, he was already jumping down Katsuki’s throat about the whole situation. “You stay at his house practically every night now! I mean, you two were inseparable before but this— this is a whole new level.”

“Listen,” Katsuki levels Eijiro with a warning look that he knows will do absolutely no good. Eijiro has never been afraid of him or his temper, has never backed down under threat of bodily harm or any other, more creative, threat that Katsuki could come up with. He certainly wasn’t about to back down now. “The first time I admit that I’m in love with that damn nerd is not going to be to your ugly face, it’s going to be to his.”

“So you are in love with him!” Eijiro cries immediately, triumphant, thrusting a finger across the tiny table to point at Katsuki. His smile is so damn big it practically splits his face in half. “That’s what you just said! You’re in love with him, you just don’t want to admit it!”

“What I said,” Katsuki emphasizes, swatting Eijiro’s hand out of the air in front of him, “is that you’ll never hear me admit it to your dumb ass, so ask me something else.”

There’s a snarl to his words that seems to bounce off of Eijiro completely, the way his attitude always has. Katsuki loves him for it, but he also hates him for it. It’s a balance, the kind that only a true friend could really pull off and Eijiro pulls it off well. He recognizes that Katsuki has drawn a clear line that he will not budge on, so he reclines in his seat again, taking his arm back to his side of the table, but he looks smug as hell doing it. It would piss Katsuki off if the situation were any different.

But the situation isn’t different, the situation is that Izuku has been in love with him for years and everyone has known it. Now Katsuki knows it, too, and the only thing left to do is own up to his feeling that everyone has apparently also known for years. He may not say it aloud to Eijiro because Izuku deserves to be the first one to hear it after everything they’ve been through, but there’s really no point in denying it to Eijiro, either. So Katsuki sneers at his smug expression before turning his gaze to the side, stubbornly refusing to be swayed by Eijiro’s smug smile.

“Alright,” Eijiro concedes after a moment and Katsuki can feel the tension drain from his shoulders. He doesn’t know what Eijiro is going to say next, doesn’t even know what he expects him to say next, but he knows for damn sure that whatever he expects, it’s not what Eijiro actually says. “You see it now, though, don’t you? What we’ve all seen for years?”

Katsuki could lie and say no— would even like to lie simply because it’s still something he doesn’t want to talk about. He’s been doing a better job of wrapping his head around the situation, better with not tamping down his feelings the moment they start to arise, but that instinct to deflect still comes naturally to him. Not to mention how easy it is to fall back into old patterns in those moments where he’s able to forget or pretend that Izuku hasn’t lost his memories. Even if they’re forming new routines, even if they’re doing things differently than they ever did before, it’s still easy to pretend that this is just a small blip in a larger picture instead of a complete overhaul of everything he’s held onto for years.

But then again, he did go through change with Izuku once— and that was when he had decided to stop being such an asshole to him and instead meet him in the middle. That change hadn’t been easy, either. It had taken the same type of conscious thought, of purposeful behavior modification that this was taking. It had been something that Katsuki had decided to do, the last time he had forced himself out of running and instead told himself that he had to face something head on. And that— that had turned out to be the best thing he ever did. Changing to be there for Izuku instead of constantly standing against Izuku had turned him into the best version of himself. It was that change that allowed him to put his ego aside and take a hero partner, that allowed him to consistently top the polls as the #1 hero. It was because he had changed for Izuku that the entirety of his life had changed for the better.

So maybe, if he were luckier than he ever deserved to be, this change would push his life past his expectations and turn it into the life of his dreams. Maybe, if he could manage to not fuck up this one final opportunity—

“Yeah,” He replies without looking back at Eijiro. His throat feels tight, constricted by all the years of doubt, fear, and hesitation that he’s still trying to rid himself of. “I see it.”

There’s a moment of silence following his words and that feels profound, somehow.

And then Eijiro blows out a breath, sounding shaky as if he were the one who had been trying to find his footing in the completely backwards version of his life. The sound of it almost makes Katsuki want to laugh bitterly. “Kats,” Eijiro says, his voice devoid of all smugness from just minutes before. “You know that you’re not going to mess this up, right? I’ll never totally understand your childhood together but considering you came to UA pretending you hated him, I think it’s fair to say that it was rocky at times. And he loved you through all of that anyways. If you’re honest with him and you fight for him, you can’t mess this up.”

“No,” Katsuki says, and it comes out as broken as he feels about the whole situation still. Still. After all the nights in Izuku’s apartment, after watching Izuku get to know him again and fall in love with him again, despite everything, he still feels broken about the whole things, feels like he doesn’t deserve the good outcome that it seems like he’s barreling towards without any control whatsoever. And that, he knows, is a feeling that won’t go away until he gets to talk to the Izuku that remembers everything, the Izuku that he has loved for all these years. “I don’t know that. And neither do you. I’ve fucked up with him plenty of times in the past, it’s probably the thing I’m best at.”

“The thing you’re best at,” Eijiro cuts in practically the moment Katsuki is done speaking, as if he’s trying to prevent Katsuki from saying any more and going down that dark thought path, “is finding your way back to him. I’ve watched you two dance around each other for years but no matter what has happened, you’ve always ended up together again. That’ll happen here, too.”

“Yeah, well, there’s a first time for everything.” Katsuki argues weakly.

“And a last time.” Eijiro replies, undeterred. “So let this be the last time you doubt this bond you have with him. Stop fighting it man, you’ve gotta be tired of it by now.”

And damn it all, Eijiro is right. He’s fucking exhausted from all the years he’s spent pretending that Izuku doesn’t mean something to him, that they aren’t more than they say they are. He’s exhausted from stomping these feelings down and weaving intricate stories to explain away the fact that he can’t let go of Izuku, even when he says over and over again that he wants to. He’s tried of forcibly trying to slow his heart rate or dull the rise of pink in his cheeks, he’s fucking tired of trying to convince himself that his feelings aren’t something else entirely.

“What I’m tired of,” Katsuki says instead, but the silence that followed Eijiro’s words no doubt indicate what a direct hit they’d had on Katsuki’s heart, “Is your nosy ass. And being hungry! Where the hell is our food?”

Eijiro laughs, but his gaze lingers on Katsuki’s face for a long moment and Katsuki knows that he’s looking for something there. Whatever it is, he seems to find it, because his smile softens into something fond and warm. “I’m really proud of you, Kats. You’re doing the right thing.”

And whatever it is that’s suddenly choking Katsuki this time, it’s definitely not fondness for Eijiro or warmth at the entire situation because that would be stupid. Katsuki swallows around the lump in his throat and glances to the side at their waitress who is finally approaching with their food. “Shut the fuck up.”

Eijiro just laughs and kicks him lightly under the table.

--x

It takes a few more days and a general increase in petty crime for Izuku and Katsuki to convince their superiors that they should be allowed to be back out on the streets chasing down villains.

It also takes a few arguments and Katsuki nearly punching a hole in the wall, held back only by Izuku.

Really though, as far as Izuku could figure, that was about par for the course. Nobody in the agency seemed surprised by any of it, and nobody seemed to even think twice when Katsuki stalked out of the office before they were officially dismissed. Izuku had tried to stutter out some sort of apology but their boss had waved him off before he’d even gotten half the words out. By the time he’d found Katsuki again— waiting for him at the end of the hall— Katsuki had gruffly told him to save the lecture because he’d heard it all already. And then the day had proceeded from there, as if that was just a scheduled part of their day that had gone according to plan.

In the end, it’s a compromise. They’re allowed back on patrol as long as they stay together, but they won’t get any actual missions until things between them are settled— whatever that’s actually supposed to mean. Izuku thinks he can see the thinly veiled meaning pretty easily but he doesn’t ask or press for any sort of clarification. Honestly, no matter how worried everyone seems to be about their situation, Izuku can’t feel the concern echoed in his own heart. Every part of him is already starting to lean back into Katsuki, to reach out to him. He feels it more every day, more every time he spends even a moment around Katsuki. Each new day he wakes up and something happens that floods him with that worm, content feeling. Every day, Katsuki says something that makes Izuku smile, or tries to stifle his own smile at something Izuku had done. Every day they manage to find their way back to each other, manage to be drawn closer to each other despite the things trying to keep them apart. So no, Izuku isn’t worried because he knows that everything will work out fine.

And Katsuki is— well, he’s trying.

And trying, for Katsuki, looks a lot like starting sentences only to end them halfway through, stubbornly looking away. Trying, for Katsuki, looks a lot like that expression he gets when he has a thought on his mind but can’t figure out what to do with it or how to say it. Trying, for Katsuki, looks a lot like struggling, honestly. But when Izuku invites him in— or when Katsuki invites himself in, much to Izuku’s bemused delight— he always accepts and comes in without hesitation. He doesn’t try to leave Izuku in the dust when they’re out on patrol and doesn’t push Izuku away, just like he promised.

It’s clear that it’s hard for him and it’s even clearer that Izuku’s words about being stuck in the past had really struck some sort of chord in Katsuki’s heart. He seemed to be lost in thought a lot lately, his gaze far off when things were slow. If there was anything that worried Izuku, it would have to be that. He was afraid he had crossed one too many lines, afraid he had pushed too far. But Katsuki hadn’t recoiled in on himself completely and he always blinked back to reality when Izuku called out to him, his gaze slowly focusing back on Izuku.

Plus, it’s not just Katsuki that’s been lost in thought. Though it’s much more normal for Izuku to be trapped somewhere in his mind, he finds that it’s happening even more the last few days. He thinks a lot about what Katsuki has said to him, what the others have said to him. He thinks about their boss telling them that they’re the best pair of heroes to have ever existed, that nobody can beat them as long as they’re together. He thinks about the way everyone seems to think they’re better together than they are apart— everyone except Katsuki. But the more he thinks about it, the more he starts to believe that Katsuki also knows they’re better together, he just doesn’t know what to do with that knowledge. That, Izuku realizes as they turn a corner on their patrol, seems to be the common thread. And he can’t fault Katsuki for that. They were both thrust into a crazy, unexpected and entirely unknown situation. It was only fair to feel al little lost, a little conflicted.

It was probably even harder for Katsuki who had all of the knowledge still. It was probably harder with the whole picture staring back at him.

Izuku sighs.

“I’ll have you know that this is your fault.” Katsuki grumbles from his side at the sound of his sigh, only in half of his hero uniform. He had elected to leave his gauntlets behind, leaving the entirety of his arms exposed. Izuku tried not to take in the sight, even though he found it hard to do. “We haven’t had to do patrol in over a year.”

“Obviously it’s my fault.” Izuku replies with a fond roll of the eyes. It was his memory loss that was preventing them from doing any real hero work, that had been stated in no unclear terms. “Though I don’t think you threatening our boss really sold him on the idea of letting us have any missions.”

“Bastard.” Katsuki spits, pressing briefly against Izuku’s side to pass around a throng of people who whisper as they go by. A few eyes follow them but more than that, Izuku notices the smiles. The people seem happy to see them out and together. “You’re fine. He’s being stupid by refusing to let us return to work.”

“He’s trying to be careful.” Izuku reasons, shooting a pointed look at Katsuki who sneers in response. “Our job is dependent upon our teamwork.”

“And our teamwork is fucking fine.”

“I agree.” Izuku offers. “But weren’t you just complaining a few days ago about not having work?”

“This is grunt work, not hero work.” Katsuki replies sharply. His distaste for their patrol assignment had been on clear display since their boss had given it to them, but that didn’t stop him from hunching his shoulders and frowning at the ground before them. “We should be out taking care of things like—“

Something rumbles in the distance and the ground shakes beneath their feet.

“—like that.” Katsuki finishes after a momentary pause, the sounds of panic starting to erupt around them.

The look they share is fleeting, only a split second at best, and then they’re both taking off towards it without a moment of hesitation. Izuku calls for One for All without even a real thought, keeping perfect pace with Katsuki and his explosions. They skid around corners, leaping over civilians as necessary until they find themselves diving straight into the rubble of a partially destroyed building.

The moment they land, they both take off for their respective duties. It’s entirely unspoken, but it goes off without a hitch. Katsuki jumps straight into battle with the villain who’s holding another explosive in his hand and Izuku starts filing out all the people that had been trapped, throwing aside pieces of rubble to make sure everyone is safe. He doesn’t glance over his shoulder to check on Katsuki because he is absolutely and completely certain that Katsuki is fine— if there’s any that can deal with the explosions of someone else, it’s Katsuki.

His brain is edging closer and closer to remembering Katsuki every moment, but his heart has clearly never forgotten him and in this moment, his heart is in control. And it has full faith in Katsuki, it has every belief that Katsuki can and will handle the battle with no difficulties and that allows Izuku to focus completely on his own task, unwavering faith in Katsuki despite everything they have going on between them at the moment.

People greet him fondly, thanking him as he helps clear a path out of the wreckage for them. Somewhere in the back of Izuku’s mind he realizes that this scene looks similar to the one he had seen on the television, the one where he’d had his memories of Katsuki taken away. Of course, this seems much less stressful and dangerous than that one, but he still has a moment of deja vu. It’s a weird feeling, to remember something he honestly can’t actually remember but instead has only seen on tv, but he feels it all the same.

Izuku clutches the hand of an elderly lady and helps her balance as she carefully makes her way across the rubble and to the ground safely one the other side. There’s a series of explosions going off a few feet away but nobody— not even the civilians— seems to be paying it any amount of mind. Something about that warms Izuku up from the inside out— something about the knowledge that the city trusts Katsuki as much as he does. Ochako had made comments about Katsuki and his attitude and it was clear for Izuku to see what kind of reputation he could have built for himself, but the people around him clearly felt safe knowing that Katsuki was watching and protecting their backs. Nobody doubted him and that spoke volumes to Izuku about the real contents of Katsuki’s heart, the gold he knew was beating away underneath Katsuki’s ribs.

“Thank you, dear boy.” The woman mumbles, clutching Izuku’s hand in both of her own. “It’s so good to see you back on the streets again. We’ve missed you. Both of you.”

He offers her the warmest smile he has, which is exceptionally warm and maybe a little wobbly with currently unnamed emotions around the edges, “We’ve missed being out here, too.” He says, and then remembers the lie Katsuki had told the public and thinks that they really do all believe that he’s been away on some secret follow up mission. “We just had a few other things to take care of first. But we’re always here to protect you.”

“I know you are.” She pats the back of his hand fondly, “And you’re always there to protect each other, too.”

That catches Izuku momentarily off guard and it takes him a second to mumble a “Yeah, we are.”

“I can’t imagine one of you without the other.” She says around a warm smile, her gaze drifting past him to where Katsuki is fighting in the back. “Now go to him. You need each other.”

She takes her leave after that and Izuku knows that his cheeks are flushed pink. He has no idea how this gentle elderly woman just hit the nail so perfectly on the head, but he feels something in his gut stirring at her words. Now is not the time to think about them, but he commits them to memory— commits the whole moment to memory. What she says, how she says it, the look on her face and the gentle touch of her hands as she talks. It’s all important to Izuku and he is absolutely certain he’s going to want to think about it later.

Later. When there isn’t a battle going on behind him, the ground rumbling intermittently with explosions, small bits of concrete raining to the ground. Later, after this battle is finished. So he shelves those thoughts and turns to scan his surroundings and make sure that all the civilians have been taken to safety. The police have showed up by now, forming a perimeter around them in case the villain tries to escape. A few officers are examining the victims that Izuku had saved, looking at shallows cuts and bruises and reassuring them that everything was under control. A quick sweep determines that all of the people in the area were under the police’s care at this point, so the only thing left to worry about was taking care of the villains that had started all this trouble.

Another explosions shakes the ground below Izuku’s feet and he turns to watch the battle unfold before him. He had asked Katsuki a lot of questions about his quirk and his costume, about the special moves he had developed. It had been the easiest thing to get Katsuki to open up about after everything they’ve been through in the last week. It wasn’t an emotionally charged conversation, there was no thinking that Katsuki had to do before he answered. These were just facts— just straight, simple statements. He seemed to enjoy talking about his quirk as much as Izuku enjoyed learning about it, so it had made for a lengthy but very interesting conversation over the last few days. But it was one thing to have it all explained to him and it was another to see it in action.

Just like the video of their fight Izuku had watched on the tv, Katsuki was effortlessly graceful in all of his movements. Even though it was clear that his fighting style was completely offensive, he had a certain finesse about everything he did. The way he arced through the air, the perfect crouch that he landed in when his feet touched the ground— everything he did, he made look easy. Izuku had thought it when he’d seen the battle on TV, he’d thought it when they had spent a few afternoons sparring and he certainly thought it now— everything Katsuki did was the result of a ton of training and that was obvious. But more obvious than that was the fact that the training had paid off. Katsuki was completely in control— of his quirk, of the fight, of the entire situation at hand.

And still— still, despite the fact that Izuku knew that he could handle it completely on his own, despite the fact that the villain was clearly at a disadvantage, his explosions nothing compared to Katsuki’s, despite it all, Katsuki takes a brief break from the battle to glance over his shoulder, his eyes locking on Izuku.

“Let’s go, Deku.” Is all he says.

And just like that, Izuku feels One for All surge through his veins, feels the familiar sizzle of his quirk as it spreads through his body. The villain takes off and Katsuki is close on his tail, but lacking his gauntlets makes him just the tiniest bit slower, his explosions just a little smaller. The villain tries to shake Katsuki, hopping up the side of a building and using some of the rubble to try and cover his tracks. Katsuki navigates it as best as he can, but the villain gets just a little bit more of a head start on him, a little bit more of a gap grows between them.

And then a thought occurs to Izuku.

“Kacchan!” He calls as he takes off, using the side of the building to launch himself in Katsuki’s direction.

Katsuki glances at him again, sees where Izuku is and everything seems to click into place. There are no words exchanged, no explanation of what Izuku is planning. Katsuki just sees it all in that brief moment. And then he trusts Izuku— trusts him completely and absolutely. He leaps off the piece of rubble he was standing on, free falling towards the ground below him as the villain continues to climb higher and higher away from him. But his eyes never stray from Izuku, his attention never wavers as he reaches a hand out. Izuku flies through the sky towards him, and they meet in the middle the way they always do.

Izuku’s hand closes around Katsuki’s and that moment is electricity, shooting up his his arm, down his spine and straight into his mind. As he spins them around, releasing Katsuki to launch him towards the villain and seal their victory, he realizes that he could never, never have this kind of connection with somebody else. There would never be someone else who understood him so completely, who trusted him so wholly. There was nobody else that sort of move could ever be executed successfully with.

Katsuki captures the villain and Izuku is waiting for them on the ground when they land. The police hurry in to take custody of the villain and Izuku steps aside to make room for them. They make quick work of hauling the villain away and already a crew is hustling in to help clean the area up. Katsuki is talking to a few of the police officers, giving an statement as they are required to do.

Izuku ambles over at the end of the conversation, just in time for the nearest officer to acknowledge him with a smile. “We can always count on you two. You guys really are the best team.”

There is a moment of silence after Izuku properly thanks the police officer and then he’s looking at Katsuki and Katsuki is looking back at him. For a moment, the world slows to a stop around him. It’s just the two of them, back in this world that they are protecting together. It’s just the two of them, a team, an indefeatable duo. It’s just them— Katsuki and Izuku, two people who always find their way back to each other, who always stay by each other’s sides, who understand each other unfailingly through everything. Something had shifted in Izuku when he’d caught Katsuki midair and whatever that thing was, it was stirring inside of him now, shifting like it was looking for a place to settle.

And then Katsuki holds his fist out and Izuku understands immediately what he wants. With a small smile, he raises his own fist to bump it against Katsuki’s— a sign of their victory, of their teamwork. The moment his knuckles brush against Katsuki’s, that same electric jolt shifts up his arm, down his spine and straight into his head. And this time, that thing that’s looking for a place to settle finally clicks and everything falls into place.

--x

It didn’t take anything more than that one minor villain for their boss at the agency to see reason and to allow them back to almost full hero work— everything except missions. He continued to require their daily training, but was allowing them back on investigations as long as it didn't involve them leaving the city yet. To be fair, they had proven that their teamwork wasn’t damaged, despite the situation they had found themselves in, so the basis for their boss’s argument was null and void after that fight, but Izuku didn’t say any of that and somehow, Katsuki managed to bite back most of his words, too. Izuku thanks him politely, promising to let them know if something goes wrong or if at any point he feels like they aren’t up to par. Katsuki just smiles smugly as they walk out of the office, his shoulders squared with triumph.

“I knew he’d see reason.” Katsuki barks as they crowd together into the tiny elevator that takes way too long to make it to any floor. The thing is old and decrepit and honestly a safety hazard. It’s an ongoing joke in the agency about how it’s going to break down one day and then they’ll be forced to perform a rescue mission on their fellow heroes instead.

Izuku rolls his eyes as the doors shut and he presses the button for the lobby. “He wanted us to prove ourselves and we did. We didn’t outsmart him, Kacchan.”

Katsuki leans back against the back wall of the elevator, hands shoved into his pockets. “I told him that our teamwork was fine and I was right.”

The only response he gets is a huff as Izuku takes up the spot next to him, also leaning against the wall as the elevator finally jerks to life.

The walls of the elevator and mirrored, a weirdly tacky thing that seems to be a trend in elevators. Katsuki’s never understood it, but right now he finds he’s almost a little grateful for it. Ever since they had finished rounding up those low-level villains, Izuku had gotten suspiciously quiet. He’d walked next to Katsuki the entire way back to the agency after they’d gotten a call from their boss requesting their presence immediately. And he’d responded perfectly fine to everything Katsuki had said, even smiling at his remarks or rolling his eyes as he always did. But there was something different about him.

Katsuki couldn’t put his finger on it, even as he studied Izuku’s fractured reflection in the mirrored panels across from them. Izuku’s gaze was distant and his lips were moving as he mumbled something to himself. Katsuki could faintly hear it, could pick up words here and there but he didn’t really even try to decipher it. The few words he did pick up were related to quirks and minor analyses of the battle they’d just had. It was so typically Izuku that it felt painfully right and painfully wrong at the same time.

In the week and some days since the quirk had accidentally discharged on Izuku, Katsuki had gone through damn near every known emotion to man. And somewhere in there, they had settled into a new routine, a routine that was better than the one they’d had before. Somewhere in the last few days, all the confusion, all the anger, all the guilt that Katsuki had been drowning under had started to subside. Not disappear— he wasn’t sure it would ever disappear completely— but the tide had started to go out and he had started to be able to breathe again.

He had thought a lot about what Izuku had said about being stuck in the past. At first, he’d thought that Izuku was fucking insane— not insane to say that Katsuki was stuck on what he’d done in the past because he was, but insane to have insisted that he could move on from it so easily. If Katsuki was torn up over it all these years later and he wasn’t the receiver of the abuse, how could Izuku possibly move on? But if there was one thing that Izuku forgetting Katsuki had proven undoubtedly true, it was that Izuku was the same person to the very depth of his core. It had proven that Izuku would be there for Katsuki unfailingly, that he would always see the good in Katsuki, even when it didn’t feel like it was there. Even when Izuku didn’t remember Katsuki, he could understand him, could read him, could work flawlessly with him.

All Might had said something to them once back in school— okay, he’d said a lot of things and teenage Katsuki had only listened to about half of it, his big head convinced that it knew more than anyone else ever could— and it seemed to ring true now. He had been the first one to tell them that they worked better together, that they had a similar goal but opposite ways of achieving it and that together, that was a perfect combination. A lot of people had made similar comments since then but it had mattered more when All Might had said it. Not because he was All Might, but because he had said it when nobody else had been able to see it— least of all Katsuki and Izuku. Now when people said they were a good team, that they were better together than they were apart, it was because they proved that over and over again, day after day, battle after battle. But when All Might had said it, Izuku and Katsuki hadn’t even started taking the steps towards their friendship. When All Might said it, Katsuki had still been biting Izuku’s head off at every turn, threatening to blast his ass off the face of the Earth if he so much as breathed wrong.

The elevator dings after what feels like a million years— it had certainly been long enough for Katsuki to zone out completely as he lost himself in his thoughts. The ancient doors take a second to open and for a brief moment, it seems like they might not open all the way at all. Eventually they get there and Izuku is the first to press off the wall and exit the elevator. Katsuki blinks and then follows suit, his throat tightening at the way Izuku smiles at him over his shoulder as he waits for Katsuki to catch up.

Damn, when did that change happen?

Katsuki knows that it was awhile ago but he’s not sure he’s ever stopped to pinpoint the exact moment. In fact, he spent a lot of years of his life trying not to recognize it as true. Because for so many years, all the formative years of his life, it had been Izuku chasing after him, trying to catch up to him. And then, in the blink of an eye, he was chasing after Izuku. He’s not even sure if there was a moment where they were equal. It didn’t seem like Izuku had even been close to catching him and then suddenly he was miles ahead before Katsuki had a chance to even realize what was happening.

The difference, he knows, is exactly this moment. Izuku, ahead of him but waiting. Because that’s what Izuku has always done: he’s waited for Katsuki and never truly gone on ahead without him. Izuku had been a guiding light for Katsuki and he’d never so much as gotten far enough away for that light to even dim. He was the sun, a lighthouse in the middle of the storm, a beacon for Katsuki to guide him to where he needed to be. Katsuki had spent all the years of his childhood trying to leave Izuku in the past, trying to create distance between them but Izuku had never tried to leave him behind, even when he absolutely could have.

Fuck, okay, maybe Eijiro had been right when he’d said that Katsuki had been in love with Izuku in high school. He’d never tell the bastard, but it rings really true as Katsuki falls into step by Izuku’s side and they head out of their agency headquarters together.

“C’mon,” Katsuki says gruffly as they meld into the crowds of people on the sidewalk, trying to distract his thoughts and settle the feeling that’s steadily been building in him since he’d seen the look in Izuku’s eyes after their fist bump after the villain fight. “We’re going to my place.”

“We are?” Izuku asks, but he trails Katsuki immediately anyways, weaving easily around the people that come between them.

“We’re celebrating.” Katsuki answers immediately, ducking around a particularly large crowd of people and down an alleyway that serves as a shortcut to his place. “We got put back on missions, that deserves a good meal.”

“Are you… cooking?” It takes a second for Izuku to catch up after the slow moving crowd of people had blocked off the entrance to the alley, He scrambles back to Katsuki’s side and glances up at him, a few smears of dirt on his face from their fight earlier.

“What?” Katsuki glances sideways at Izuku and there’s just something about his expression that’s— Katsuki isn’t sure. Because it’s an expression he’s seen a million times and yet somehow it feels different in this moment. “You don’t trust my cooking all of a sudden? I’ll have you know I’m a fucking phenomenal cook. Just because I haven’t made you anything extravagant in the past week doesn’t mean I’m incapable of it. A celebration deserves an amazing meal and I’m damn sure gonna make one!”

“No, no, I know you’re a great cook!” Izuku rushes to correct his clearly unintentional implication. “I just don’t want you to feel like you have to.”

Katsuki scoffs as they sneak in the back entrance to his apartment building. Technically nobody but the front desk staff is supposed to come in through this door but being one of the #1 pro heroes has perks. He stops and holds the door open for Izuku as he starts to say, “I know I don’t have to, I offered—“ and then his mind catches all the way up to what Izuku had said and he catches him by the sleeve. “What do you mean you know?”

“What?”

“You said you know I’m a good cook.” Katsuki repeats and he watches as Izuku’s expression falls. “Did you write that in your fucking nerd notebook or something?” When Izuku doesn’t immediately respond, Katsuki tacks on, “I know I cooked for you some in the last week, but it certainly wasn’t anything fancy. Nothing that would make you say you knowI’m a good cook.”

There’s a long moment of silence where Izuku looks anywhere but at Katsuki and it’s really all the answer Katsuki needs. He takes a step forward and the door swings shut behind him, echoing louder than anything he’s ever heard in the otherwise empty hallway they find themselves in. It’s nothing but the two of them and the metal service stairs, the light dim and flickering, It’s just them, there’s not a damn thing else to look at in this hallway and yet, Izuku is still not looking at Katsuki, not saying anything.

“Deku,” Katsuki warns, taking another step forward. Somewhere in the undertones of his voice is a plea, a hope, a fear. It’s all mixed in there together, the same jumble of emotions and worries and dreams that he’s been juggling for the last week. He still can’t tell where one ends and the other begins and by the way his words come out, that’s abundantly clear. “Why did you say you know?”

Izuku finally takes a deep breath, one that Katsuki can feel echoed inside of his own bones, and he looks up to meet Katsuki’s gaze. And there, in his eyes, is the one thing that’s been missing for the last week— recognition. Katsuki wouldn’t have been able to name it once it was gone, but now that it’s back, the difference is stark and startling. Izuku doesn’t have to say a damn thing for Katsuki to know what has happened because the way Izuku is looking at Katsuki in this moment is the exact way he has looked at Katsuki for twenty-something years. It’s the same look Katsuki has seen day in and day out for his entire life.

It’s the look of an Izuku who knows who he is and what he’s done.

“I don’t hate you, Kacchan.” Is all Izuku says.

The world shatters around Katsuki’s feet. He had known this moment was coming, had been able to see the signs this time— he had known, but he apparently still wasn’t prepared. He had thought that there would be more time, that he would have a chance to figure out what he wanted to say and how he wanted to say it. He’d barely even gotten to the point of acceptance of the situation they were in and already it was changing again. Katsuki feels like the world is tipping one way and he’s going the other and any moment now he’s going to crash and burn.

“You bastard. It took you a week.” Katsuki breathes, the words as fragile as he feels in this moment. “Only a week.”

“Hey,” Izuku replies just as gently, clearly cautious of Katsuki’s reaction. “It was the longest week of my life. Do you know what it was like to have almost the entirety of my memories gone? Kacchan, you’re in almost every single memory I have. My entire past was a complete blank!”

Somehow, despite the fact that Katsuki has spent the last week trying to prepare himself for this moment, despite his conversations with Eijiro, his threats from Ochako, the nights he had spent awake in Izuku’s bed trying and failing to not watch the damn nerd sleep, the panic he had been fighting against for this last week is rising inside of him and showing no signs of stopping. It was one thing to imagine the hypothetical change, to think about how he would confront this situation when it happened, it was another thing entirely to actually be facing it.

Katsuki had never been particularly eloquent with his words and that was proving to be more true than ever right now. He didn’t have any idea what to say, didn’t know how to express his shock.

And maybe, just maybe, there was a small part of him that had feared that Izuku would end up rejecting him anyways, even though every fiber of him knew how unlike Izuku that would be.

“And now you remember it all.” He finally manages to get out, his voice feeling raw, his throat sore as if the words are cutting him on their way out.

“Kacchan…” Izuku takes a step forward and it takes everything in Katsuki to stop himself from pulling back. He had swore that he would try and that meant he had to try now, too, as hard as it was.

He said he wouldn’t run and he’s going to keep his goddamn word, even if the fear that he thought he had conquered was suddenly pooling in his feet and begging him turn and bolt. He had beat this fear once, he was damn sure going to beat it again. “I just—“ Katsuki clears his throat, tries to sound like he isn’t drowning even though he absolutely is. “I just thought it would take longer.”

Izuku’s quiet for a Long moment and even though Katsuki isn’t looking directly at him, he feels like he can still see the gears turning in Izuku’s mind, can hear them cranking away as they put ideas together, working overdrive to make up for the last week that things have been different.

Finally, he steps back out of Katsuki’s space, dropping his own gaze. “I should go.”

Katsuki knows that he should say something to stop Izuku, that he should muster up the courage he’s spent the lsat week-and-some days gathering, he knows that he has made a whole list of things that he needs to tell Izuku now that he has his Izuku back, but every word he could possibly manage seems to shrivel up and die in his chest, refusing to be spoken.

Izuku glances up at him briefly, offers him a small, sad smile, and then steps broadly around Katsuki to sneak out the door without another word. And the most striking thing of it all isn’t the fact that Izuku has fallen in love with him again, it isn’t the fact that Izuku apparently has all of his memories back— it’s the fact that this is the first time in this whole mess that Katsuki has seen Izuku look sad. He had handled everything that had happened between them with a smile and his usual perky attitude. But the moment that Katsuki finally needed to step up, the moment he finally needed to commit and take that leap of faith, he couldn’t do it.

He’d manage to fuck it up, just like he knew he was going to.

--x

It takes two days— two days of Izuku staring at Katsuki, watching his every move, and then looking away every time Katsuki looks at him. Two days of tense silences in the elevator in the morning, staring at their feet to avoid making eye contact in the mirrored walls that surround them. Two days of an empty apartment in the middle of the night, fingertips itching to send out a text requesting Katsuki’s presence.

It takes two days and then Izuku finally cracks.

Because he can’t take this— the awkward silences, the distance between them. Even when they were at their worst when they were younger, things were never this awkward. Izuku understands, of course. Katsuki not only has to reconcile the fact that Izuku was in love with him for years— something that Izuku now can appreciate the full magnitude of, something that Izuku can now really realize the severity of for Katsuki— but also the fact that Izuku has fallen in love with him again. If Izuku had to guess, Katsuki likely was considering throwing himself off the rooftop of one of the nearby buildings.

Training was the only time that things were bearable between them. The restless energy that seemed to sizzle in the air between them could be channeled into their fights, trading blows instead of words to work off some of the steam that seemed to be suffocating them both. It was the only time they could talk because it was the kind of talking they were able to do without using words. Somehow, despite the disaster that the last week had been, their connection remained unbroken. When they stood opposite of each other in the training room, they remained evenly matched. They continued to be able to predict each other’s moves, to forecast what the other was going to do before he even had a chance to make a decision. It was the only time Izuku felt like he could breathe.

It was also his breaking point.

Because watching Katsuki turn his back and head for the door after one of these training sessions felt like a door closing, felt like the breath that Izuku had just gotten in being taken right back out of his lungs. It felt like all the weight on his shoulders finally breaking him down.

He knew— really, in the depths of his bones he was certain that he and Katsuki would get through this. They had to have another conversation, had to figure out where to go from here, but Izuku was confident that things wouldn’t fall apart completely. They had worked too hard over the years to mend the bond they had, to build the relationship that they have now— they weren’t gong to let that go. Izuku had never been willing to let go of their relationship, had spent the entirety of his life clinging to it with both hands and he sure as hell wasn’t about to change that now. But he also knew that Katsuki wasn’t about to turn his back and walk out, either. He knew that Katsuki had grown up enough, opened up enough, let go of enough of the past that he wouldn’t just walk away from everything they had built.

Someone just had to take the first step.

And maybe it’s because Izuku feels like he’s the one who should make the first step since it had been him and his feelings that had messed this entire thing up in the first place or maybe it’s because he’s always been the one reaching out to Katsuki, but he’s willing to take that first step.

“Kacchan, wait.” Izuku says before he can think better of it, before Katsuki can get any further away from him.

Katsuki pauses just before the door to the locker room glancing over his shoulder to look at Izuku. For a long moment, neither of them speak and Izuku feels like they’re suspended in this moment in time. When he had gotten his memories back, it hadn’t felt like getting hit with a tidal wave, it hadn’t been a gradual filtering of memories back in. It was simply as if all of the empty spaces in his head were suddenly filled, as if they had never been empty to start with. It was suddenly as if the piece of his soul that was missing had been returned. One second he was broken, half of a bigger whole, and the next second he felt complete. And when he looked at Katsuki, there was suddenly recognition there, a familiar well of love, adoration, pride overflowing.

“Listen,” Izuku glances away from Katsuki’s face, tries to swallow the emotions that are clogging his throat. “I just wanted to say that I’m sorry.”

“Shut the fuck up, Deku.” Katsuki growls at once, turning to face him properly. Izuku hadn’t realized that he’d had his hand on the door handle to the locker rooms until it falls back to his side.

“I’m serious!” Izuku insists, “I’m sorry that you had to find out how I felt through a quirk. I can only imagine how hard the last week has been for you. And I’m sorry for the things I said to you when my memories were gone. I was a bit— ah, bold, I guess, when I didn’t have my memories. And some of the things I said were out of line, and I’m sorry for that.”

“Deku,” Katsuki repeats, and there’s something unnamed quivering in his voice, something tense and taut. The way he says Izuku’s name almost sounds like a warning.

But Izuku’s never been good at listening to warnings, least of all when they come to Katsuki. “I’ll understand if things have to change.”

Before Izuku has a chance to react, Katsuki’s fist finds the front of his shirt and hauls him across the short distance between the two of them. Izuku’s head snaps up to meet Katsuki’s gaze and Katsuki is staring down at him with the kind of intensity that Izuku has rarely seen him use for anything other than battles with villains.

“I treated you like shit for years,” Katsuki says, his voice a hoarse whisper between them, rough as the words seem to rip their way out of him. “I doubted you, belittled you, pushed you away. I treated you like shit for years, and I never apologized. And then, when you needed me because you had lost all your memories, I left your ass in the hospital and damn near ran away. And you— you’re apologizing to me?”

Izuku opens his mouth to say something in response to that, but words don’t want to come. He stares back at Katsuki for a long minute, tries to read the expression in his eyes but the only thing he sees there is anguish, disappointment, heartbreak. He wishes there was a way to soothe it, a way to chase it away.

“I told you—“

“That you don’t need an apology,” Katsuki lets go of Izuku’s shirt and shoves him away, but not roughly. Izuku stumbles back a step, regaining his balance but unable to take his eye off of Katsuki’s face. “You’ve spent our entire fucking lives making excuses for me, giving me an out when I don’t deserve one. Stop letting me off the hook, Deku!” He roars, his chest and shoulders heaving. Izuku has seen Katsuki lose his cool more times than he can count, has been the reason that Katsuki has lost his cool more times than he can count, but he’s never seen anything like this. “Stop forgiving me! Why haven’t you ever been mad at me for all the shit I’ve done?”

Izuku had expected this conversation to be hard, and it was, but that question wasn’t. That was perhaps the easiest question Katsuki could ask him, the answer he knew without having to think about it.

“When we were little,” Izuku almost feels a smile tug at the corner of his lips, thinking back to their childhood as he answers. “And you first got your quirk, I was worried. Because you’d always been afraid of thunderstorms and your quirk reminded me of one. The small boom of an explosion, the bright flash, it reminded me of thunder and lightning and I was afraid that you would have a hard time with that.” Katsuki is staring back at him, clearly confused by how this relates to anything they’ve been talking about, but he doesn’t move to interrupt, doesn’t try to stop Izuku. His gaze is intense, but Izuku can press on despite that. “But you didn’t,” He says breathlessly, all the awe he’s always felt for Katsuki rising up to the surface. “You mastered your quirk, right from the very beginning. You were always so brave, Kacchan, so willing to try anything. You were always striving to be the best but to me— to me you always have been the best.”

There’s an emotion in Katsuki’s expression that Izuku hasn’t seen in a few years. It’s makes something crack open inside of his heart. He wants to reach for Katsuki, but he knows the line that’s been drawn before him and he knows that he can’t cross it. So he waits, he waits while Katsuki takes in a breath and lets it out slowly. He waits while Katsuki stares at him with that calculating expression, as if he’s trying to read some truth in Izuku. Izuku does his best to open up underneath Katsuki’s gaze, to bare himself to Katsuki.

“So, what?” Katsuki finally says when the silence had started to turn strained again. “You think I’m the best so I can get away with anything I want? Is that it?”

“No,” Izuku shakes his head. It’s something he’s never put into words before, but he’s thought about it a lot. And maybe it’s time he says it to Katsuki, maybe he should have said it to Katsuki a long time ago. “We were so young, and I put you on a pedestal. That’s a lot of pressure. The way I idolized you— I don’t think that was good for either of us, Kacchan. I wanted so badly to be like you that I tried to actually be you. I tried to do everything you did and— and I think that’s what always irritated you so much. You thought I was acting superior to you, but Kacchan I never thought I was better than you.” Izuku takes in a shaky breath as he tries to meet Katsuki’s gaze again. “I was just trying so hard to not get left behind by you.”

“Deku—“

“But I think a lot of what was wrong between us was me. It was never just you, Kacchan. It was never only your fault. So of course I forgave you.” Izuku clears his throat and presses on. “And even if I hadn’t forgiven you then, I would have forgiven you by now. Because you’re not that kid anymore, Kacchan. You’ve grown so much, and you’ve put in so much work. I could never hate you—“

The end of Izuku’s sentence dies in his throat as Katsuki reaches for him again. Only this time, instead of hauling him forward by the collar, Katsuki grabs him by the shoulders and crushes him against his now chest, his arms wrapping tightly around Izuku as he presses his face into the top of Izuku’s head. Izuku responds immediately, arms meeting behind Katsuki’s back as he returns the hug with the same intensity, pressing his face into Katsuki’s shoulder and letting out a shuddering breath that he knows Katsuki can feel.

“I never hated you,” He mumbles into Katsuki’s shoulder. The material of his shirt muffles half of his words but Izuku is certain that Katsuki can hear them anyways. “I wanted to be like you, and then when I finally got comfortable being myself, I just wanted to be near you. But—“ He shifts, turning his face so his cheek is pressed to Katsuki’s shoulder as he faces into Katsuki’s neck, his words now clear. “No matter what it was, my life always revolved around you.”

Katsuki’s arms tighten around Izuku for a moment before relaxing and then Katsuki is stepping back, his hands on Izuku’s shoulders as he holds him an arm’s length away. Izuku looks up into his face and immediately feels his throat tighten at all the emotions he’s never seen there before.

“Izuku,” Katsuki says, and Izuku stills at the use of his full name. He hasn’t heard Katsuki use his full name since they were babies, and even then, baby Katsuki usually had some shortened form of his name that he used instead. “You have given me more chances than anyone deserves, certainly more than my sorry ass has ever deserved. You always saw a good in me that, for a long time, I didn’t believe was there. And in response to that, I treated you like shit. So I’m sorry for the years that I was awful to you. I’m sorry for the way I treated you, the way I know I made you feel. I’m sorry for everything I did when we were younger.” Izuku reaches up, hands finding Katsuki’s wrists and holding them gently in his own, feeling the desperate need to have a physical connection. “But more than that—“ Katsuki struggles, for a moment, with his next words. Izuku watches as he clenches his jaw, watches the muscles flex as he tries to get himself together. “More than that, thank you. For giving me all those chances, and for letting me grow. Thank you for not walking out on me.”

“Kacchan,” Izuku trails one hand up Katsuki’s arm, across his shoulder and up his neck until he’s gently cradling the side of Katsuki’s face, feeling the tension release from his jaw as Katsuki finally turns to look at him. “I would never walk away from you. I can’t explain it, but all through my life, you felt like mine, Kacchan. No matter what happened, I knew I needed you in my life.”

And with his hand on Katsuki’s cheek like that, Izuku can feel the exact moment that he nearly drops it in shock, his lips parting as he stares down at Izuku, glancing between his eyes.

He can also feel the moment Katsuki snaps his jaw shut again, just long enough for him to take in a breath and then growl, “You are mine.”

Izuku barely has a moment to process the words before Katsuki is tugging him forward again, the new trend of the day, and then they’re meeting in the middle with a kiss that has more sparks that Katsuki’s explosions. Izuku’s hand instinctively slides back a little to thread into Katsuki’s hair, the other one clinging to his shoulder desperately, as if he’s afraid that Katsuki will disappear completely if he lets go of him. He knows that Katsuki won’t— that Katsuki won’t ever leave his side again— but he doesn’t want to let go anyways.

Katsuki’s hands find their way back to Izuku’s back, pulling him closer and Izuku thinks that maybe the quirk had some alternate effect where he starts hallucinating because he’s had a crush on Katsuki for as long as he can remember and never did he see it actually going anywhere.

In all the secret daydreams that Izuku had lost himself in— the ones where he was allowed to freely stare at Katsuki as the rays of sun lit his hair like a halo, the ones where they snuck off somewhere during patrol to have a little time to themselves, even the ones where they just spent time together, doing nothing of great importance but just being with each other— he had never had one that he thought would actually come true. It used to make him sad, to think that he would always have this deep love for Katsuki that would never be returned. And then, at some point, he made peace with it, had resolved himself to continue loving Katsuki with his whole heart because he couldn’t imagine doing anything else, but had decided that he would never ask for that back from Katsuki.

Katsuki had great things to do in his life, fantastic places that he was going to go, He had people to save and a city to protect and as the years went on, Izuku realized how lucky he was to just be included in that, He didn’t need more, even if his heart would always want more. Any amount of Katsuki that was willingly given to him was more than it had seemed like he would get in their younger years and Izuku knew from the very beginning what a blessing that was. He wasn’t going to take it for granted by wishing he had more. He had been given a gift in the form of Katsuki Bakugo and that had only become more and more true over the years.

Finally, they part, but Katsuki doesn’t let Izuku go. He’s staring down at Izuku as if he’s also afraid that Izuku might disappear if he let’s go. He’s looking at Izuku as if he’s terrified, and Izuku knows him well enough to know that he must be. Change has always been hard for Katsuki and this? This is the biggest change that could possibly happen.

“Kacchan?” Izuku’s thumb strokes across his cheek as he puts the tentative question into the air.

This is it, the final moment. This is the moment that will make or break the entirety of their future.

If Katsuki takes it all back, if he falls back into the pattern that they’ve lived in for all these years, it’ll hurt, but Izuku will survive it, He’ll smile through it and he’ll go back to tamping down all of his emotions and he’ll just take Katsuki as a best friend. But if Katsuki doesn’t—

“You’re an annoying nerd.” Katsuki breathes into the barely-there space between them, his words trembling with the same emotions that Izuku can feel flooding through his veins. “And I have been in love with you for our entire goddamn lives.”

The world stops, Izuku’s heart stops, time stops. Whatever air Izuku had been breathing seems to be gone completely as he listens to Katsuki’s words and for a moment, he feels like he’s suspended in a completely different place— a place that he thinks most people commonly refer to as cloud nine. Because he can’t imagine being any happier than this. He considers pinching himself but honestly, if he’s dreaming, he doesn’t want to know.

“Say it again.” He whispers in response.

But Katsuki makes an offended noise and shoves him a step or two away, ears burning already. “No! Shitty nerd, learn how to listen the first time I say something to you!”

Izuku laughs as he slides back up to Katsuki’s side, reaching out to touch him now that he has the ability to do that. Katsuki stills under his touch, turning to look at him with a vulnerable and unguarded expression.

“I love you, Kacchan.” Izuku says, the freedom of finally giving life to his secret something he never could’ve imagined, “It was always you. And yes, that is something I wrote in my diary.”

Katsuki can’t stifle a huff of a laugh as he pulls Izuku. Back to him, muttering something under his breath that Izuku doesn’t honestly care to hear, instead just kissing the half-hearted complaints right off his lips.

--x

“Kacchan,” Izuku grumbles as he follows Katsuki out of their agency building, adjusting his gloves as he levels Katsuki with a withering look. “You went too far.”

“I absolutely did not.” Katsuki replies, stopping and waiting for Izuku to catch up to him.

The frown on Izuku’s lips does absolutely nothing to deflate Katsuki’s perfect mood. “You told him to learn a goddamn lesson from this, and to never fucking doubt us again.”

Katsuki doesn’t even try to stifle the smile that comes to his lips as he stretches his arms over head and then across his chest while Izuku finishes settling his costume. After they had finally hashed the last of everything out, after Katsuki had finally gotten over himself and stepped out of his own way, they had gone back to their boss to tell him that Izuku’s memories had returned and there was no reason for them to be put on any sort of ban. Katsuki had all but demanded that they be returned to missions immediately, unable to stop himself from slipping in a few other thoughts, as well.

“I was right, wasn’t I? He was stupid to doubt us in the first place.” Katsuki takes off down the street, heading in the direction of their next mission and Izuku falls into step next to him the way he has a million times before. And on one hand, this feels exactly like it’s always felt, walking forward into his future with Izuku at his side. On the other hand, it feels completely and utterly different. Everything has changed, but also nothing has changed because they were always heading in this direction. “We’re the wonder duo.”

“We still have a boss that we have to answer to.” Izuku replies.

But no matter what he says, he can’t dampen Katsuki’s mood. The look on their boss’s face can’t dampen his mood. Hell, the whole world could try, but it wouldn’t succeed. Because he had finally gotten everything he ever wanted in the form of his best-friend-turned-boyfriend. He had finally gotten a chance that he didn’t fuck up. He had been handed his happy-ever-after wrapped up in the neat package that was Izuku Midoriya and now that he had accepted that his life was, in fact, a love story, he wouldn’t change a goddamn thing about it.

“Shut up, Deku.” He replies mildly, the smile still on the edges of his lips.

Izuku stops, turning to face Katsuki. “Make me,” he says.

Katsuki looks down at him, sees the way Izuku tilts his chin up in a clear indication of what he means, sees the familiar challenge in Izuku’s eyes, hears it in his voice.

And, well, Katsuki Bakugo doesn’t back down from a challenge.

#listen okay #this is unedited because I need to sleep #and Tumblr doesn't carry over formatting like italics #so this just has no formatting #because I do not have the time to go through and reread this whole mess to put it all back in #so I'm sorry about that #blame Tumblr for being frustrating #bkdk #bakudeku #fanfic #so3 #bnha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia #mha

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fairyhaos · 1 month

Text

❖ no such thing as too perfect // jeon wonwoo

wonwoo x gn!reader, 2k+ words

tags: office au, established relationship, fluff, kinda crack, junhui is the best work bestieTM ever, yn is Dramatic and In Love

warnings: none

notes: this was only meant to be like, 1.2k.... idk what happened but im not apologising. also there are a couple of pov switches which i hope make sense!!

“I think I need to break up with him,” you say, and Junhui blinks around a mouthful of salad.

“Who?” he asks, spraying pieces of feta cheese all over the table, and you wrinkle your nose and brush away a few bits that get too close to you and your bento box. He frowns, and then his eyes widen. “Oh my god, you need to break up with Jeon Wonwoo? Why do you need to break up with Jeon Wonwoo?”

You wince as Junhui's loud exclamation rings throughout the office canteen, making several heads turn to look at the two of you.

“Don't yell it so loud—and why are you saying his name in italics?”

“Because this is Jeon Wonwoo,” Junhui emphasises again, shoving salad passionately into his mouth before carrying on talking. “He's the only one of your boyfriends that I've actually ever approved of. Which is crazy, because Soonyoung introduced him to you, and I've never pinned Soonyoung as a guy that knows boyfriend-material guys.”

You reach over and lower Junhui’s fork, preventing him from eating and talking at the same time. “I don't know,” you sigh. “I just… I don't think this is going to work.”

“What did he do?” Junhui asks. His face morphs into a more serious look. “Do I need to murder him for you?”

“No, I— no! Don't murder him!” you say quickly, shaking your head. “He hasn't done anything wrong. It's just. I think I need to break up with him.”

The grave look melts from Junhui's face, and then he frowns. “You need to break up with him… even though he hasn't done anything wrong?”

“Yes.”

Junhui stares at you, mystified, then snatches back his fork to keep eating his salad. “Okay, so you've gone insane. Nice to know.”

You sigh at Junhui's response, rubbing your temples.

Whilst it does sound insane for you to break up with Wonwoo even though he's done nothing wrong, in your eyes, it's actually quite understandable.

Nothing has gone wrong, per se: you've been dating Wonwoo for about ten months now, and everything has been perfect. He's been perfect.

Maybe… a little too perfect.

He's always being so gentle and courteous, silently reading your emotions and knowing exactly how you're feeling at any given moment. He knows what you need before you even know that you need it—giving you little cheek kisses to remind you that you're loved, pushing a chocolate bar into your hand when you're all dizzy and tired, hugging you to sleep when you've had a bad day.

The bento box that you're opening and having for lunch? That was prepared by him too.

Jeon Wonwoo is just so goddamn perfect, and it worries you.

“I don't think I'm good enough for him,” you admit whilst Junhui is busily sipping his water.

It's fascinating how he manages to eat so frantically whilst eating so slowly at the same time, you think idly, as Junhui chokes on the tiny sip he was taking. He sets down the glass, wiping his mouth and blinking at you.

“Sorry, what?”

“Come on, Junhui, do I really have to say it again?” you complain, beginning to open your bento box. “You heard me.”

“Yeah, and I couldn't believe my ears,” he says, tilting his head sideways. “You? Not good enough for him? Please. That's crazy.”

You make a questioning noise. “You just said that he's the only boyfriend of mine that you approved of.”

“Exactly.” Junhui stabbed his fork in your direction, before going back to shovelling leaves into his mouth. “You're perfect for him, and he's perfect for you. I predicted it from the moment you met.”

“I don't know about me being perfect for him, but he really is just too perfect for me,” you whine. “Him and his stupidly warm eyes and that smile… oh, Junhui, he makes me feel like the most beautiful person in this entire universe.” You look down at your bento box, pouting. “Wonwoo's just so perfect.”

Junhui makes a face. “Gross, but okay. I still don't see your point, though. Wonwoo's perfect, and you're both good enough for each other. I don't see why you think you need to break up with him.”

Still looking down at the bento box, you let out a sigh. All of the food is neatly packed away into the separate compartments, and he's even arranged the sesame seeds on your rice into a little heart. It's an awfully goofy but also an awfully Wonwoo thing to do, and you can feel your heart squeezing painfully in your chest, the longer you stare at it.

This is not good. You are far too in love with Wonwoo.

That's what you tell Junhui, and he stares at you with utter disbelief as if you've finally admitted that you really have lost your mind.

“And what makes you think that he's not far too in love with you?” Junhui asks. “You know, one of the reasons that I approve of Wonwoo is because he's just so so in love with you. Like, almost disgustingly in love with you.”

“What?” You blink at him, before shaking your head. “Junhui, no, this is serious. Wonwoo's just so perfect and I'm so in love with him and—and it's actually getting dangerous now. I've literally fallen in love with him.”

Junhui stares at you for a long moment, wondering whether you're actually being serious about all of this.

“That's not a bad thing,” he insists, and then chomps on his salad in frustration. “Y/N, that's not a bad thing at all.”

“Yes it is,” you say, despairingly, looking forlorn as you prop your chin on your hand. “I love him too much. It's gonna—it's gonna get too overwhelming, soon, and then he'll start thinking I'm weird, and he'll distance himself from me, and then we'll break up and I should end this before that happens.”

Junhui shakes his head. “I don't think that's true.”

“Yes it is.”

“No it isn't. He won't break up with you.”

“Not yet.”

Junhui looks away exasperatedly, because you're adamant in wallowing in your despair over having to break up with Wonwoo because “he's too perfect” even while quite happily eating the lunch that Junhui knows Wonwoo probably prepared for you.

It's insane, he thinks, because it's obvious to him that Wonwoo loves you a lot. But he knows you and your negative thinking, and short of Wonwoo walking in here and professing his love to you all by himself, Junhui can't think of anything that could possibly convince you otherwise.

As he looks past your shoulder to the glass doors of the office canteen, however, he blinks.

There's a tall man entering the canteen, his dark hair all fluffy and his glasses-rimmed eyes scanning the area, lips pursed into a look that could almost be described as bored. He has his hands in his coat pockets, wearing the most simple casual fit ever, but he exudes such cold model energy that even Junhui blinks again.

And then he watches as the man catches sight of you and Junhui, and his entire demeanour just softens.

Junhui bites back a grin.

Wow. Maybe he’s, like, actually psychic.

“Wonwoo's here,” he says abruptly, and your head snaps up so fast that he can hear the audible click that sounds in your neck.

“Where?”

Junhui doesn't get to say anything, however, because he sees the moment that your eyes clock the tall man that's striding into the canteen, the light catching the frames of his glasses, and watches as you positively melt, in much the same way that the man had done when he saw you.

He can almost hear every infatuated thought that runs through your mind.

“Wonwoo,” you breathe, once Wonwoo steps close enough to the table that you and Junhui are eating at. His hair is all fluffy and windswept, and you resist the urge to smooth it down with your fingers.

“Hello.” Wonwoo bends down, presses a soft kiss to your forehead. “You weren't answering your phone.”

“Hm? I didn't get any text notifs from you.” You check your phone, trying to turn it on, only for the screen to remain black. “Oh. Is it dead?”

“I suspected as much,” Wonwoo says dryly, but there's a fondness in his voice as he pulls out a power bank from his pocket. “Here.”

Your eyes light up. “Oh, you're a life saver!” You look up at Wonwoo, smiling at the way his eyes look so warm as he gazes down at you. “Thank you.”

Junhui slurps his water loudly.

“Sorry,” he says, sounding not sorry at all when the two of you look over at him. “Don't mind me.”

He's grinning mischievously, for reasons that you cannot fathom, and when he leans forward to peer up at Wonwoo with curious eyes, the mischief in his grin only increases.

“So, Wonwoo, why are you here?”

Wonwoo tilts his head, pushing his glasses up at the same time. “You're Junhui.”

“The one and only,” Junhui says brightly. “I'm Y/N's work bestie. I've heard loads about you.”

You hiss in annoyance, kicking Junhui under the table even as Wonwoo laughs amusedly, placing a hand on your shoulder affectionately.

“Wen Junhui! Why would you say that?”

“Do you talk about me that often?” Wonwoo asks, and his tone is somewhere between genuinely curious and adoring and you kind of just wanna sit there and listen to his voice forever.

“Oh, all the time,” Junhui says, eyes gleaming, and you snap your gaze back to him, exasperated. “Y/N loves you so much. I hear about the extent of it every day.”

Wonwoo looks down at you, raising an eyebrow. “Really?”

You kind of want to deny it, but then that would mean lying to Wonwoo, so you don't.

“Maybe?” you say weakly, cheeks burning as you smile sheepishly up at him. “You're just, uh. Really really lovely. And, um, I kind of love you. A lot.”

Wonwoo laughs, a full and endeared laugh, twinkling with the light of a thousand suns. “I'm glad. Because you're really lovely, and I love you a lot too.”

Your eyes widen, and suddenly it's like it's just you and Wonwoo in the canteen now, him with his hand on your shoulder and those eyes, holding your very soul in place as he just smiles so lovingly and oh God you really do love him.

“Oh,” you say, soft. “Wonwoo…”

Wonwoo just smiles again. “Anyways, I came by to let you know that I'll be finishing work a bit earlier today, so call me when you're done and I'll drive by to pick you up, okay?”

You nod, mute, stunned by the gentlest words of “I love you” that had left Wonwoo's mouth just seconds before.

“It was nice meeting you,” Junhui chirps, but Wonwoo doesn't seem to hear, because he's looking down at you again, before swooping in and placing the lightest kiss on your nose and you feel like you could combust on the spot right there.

“I'll see you later?” he says.

You nod. “I'll see you later.”

Wonwoo smiles, and then the hand slides off your shoulder and he walks away.

You watch him go, watch him walk through the tables and then get to the glass doors, where he turns around one last time to wave goodbye before disappearing outside, and really, it's insane how much you love him.

And how much he loves you, it seems.

“So. He took time out of his own lunch break and came all the way here to give you a charger because he knew that you'd forgotten one and to tell you that he's picking you up later?” Junhui says, making you reluctantly turn back to him. “Y/N. If this doesn’t make you see just how in love with you Wonwoo is, then I’m gonna kick you.”

“Hey, no need for violence,” you say, raising an eyebrow, and Junhui pulls a face.

“So do you see it or do you not?”

You look over your shoulder again, out at the doors. Wonwoo’s no longer there, but you can still imagine the imprint of his warmth, lingering like the softest lavender scent over the entire area.

“Maybe I do,” you say, all wistful and dazed, a smile on your face. “Isn’t he just so perfect?”

Junhui grins, and makes use of your distracted state to steal a carrot stick from your lunch, crunching on it loudly.

“Perfect and in love with you,” he points out. “So do you still feel like you need to break up with him?”

“Hm?”

You blink, eyes still all starry from your few minutes of interacting with your boyfriend, his soft smile etched into your mind. It takes a moment for Junhui's words to register, but then they do, and you can't help but laugh.

“Oh. Oh, no. He and I are perfect.”

Junhui grins. He really is a psychic.

fics tags: @jeonginssa @weird-bookworm @minhui896 @bunnyiix @slytherinshua @haowrld @belladaises @moonlitskiiies @mirxzii @zozojella @kawennote09 @thedensworld @a-wandering-stay @abibliolife @doublasting @wonranghaeee @icyminghao @sweet-like-caramel @your-yxnnie @odxrilove @kyeomyun @crackedpumpkin @jeonride @kellesvt @sakufilms @eightlightstar @onlyyjeonghan @aaniag @amxlia-stars @raevyng @isabellah29 @hrts4hanniehae @mcu-incorrect

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pinievsev · 5 months

Note

Hi I saw you added sweet home to your list, could you do Any fic or something where the reader hurts his ankle or something and hyun soo and his monster are being overprotective please?

BOTH SIDES

Cha hyun-soo X GN! reader

Warnings: mentions of injury, S2 spoilers,kinda comedic

A/n: I know this is probably not exactly what you had in mind but I wrote it in school. Again.

Note: bold: hyun-soo monster side.

Normal: hyun-soo

Italics and (): (hyun-soo in his head )

Bold, italics and (): (hyun-soo monster in his head )

You ran after Ah-yi, who had decided she'd ran off to chase some kind of monster while hyun-soo had gone to look for necessities.

She slid under a tall metal fence, you definitely didn't fit under that. You made the drastic decision to jump over it, and as you landed, you twisted your ankle.

"Fuck." You groaned and stood up with difficulty. "Ah-yi?!" You called for the young girl you had been chasing. She appeared from behind a tree, running towards you.

"Yes?!" She asked, her adorable smile on her face. You've been calling out for her for the past half an hour. Yet that's all it took. You inhaled sharply to compose yourself.

"We need to get back home, hyun-soo will be back soon too" you tried and to your surprise she agreed fairly quickly, she yawned and made grabby hands at you.

You sighed but picked her up, hissing at the pain that shot through your ankle in the process.

It took some time, and the kid had fallen asleep in your arms but you made it. As you neared, you made out hyun-soo's voice, looking for the both of you.

You limped your way up the stairs, careful not to wake Ah-yi up. "We're here." He immediately rushed to you. "Where have you been?" He whisper yelled at you.

"She ran off to chase something." You explained handing him the child.

He carefully took her to the small room behind him and tucked her in by the corner. You followed him slowly, closing the door behind you. You sat down in the opposite corner, a groan escaping you as you felt your ankle stinging.

"Are you okay?" Hyun-soo asked, moving to sit by you "I'm fine, just hurt my ankle it'll heal." He reached out to examine it but you pulled back "let me see?." He asked as calmly as possible

You shook your head "I'm okay, really."

"Let me see." You looked up, his eyes now a piercing blue colour unlike his usual calm dark eyes.

You threw your head back, resting it on the wall "Fine." You said gesturing to your ankle.

He checked your ankle, once you Looked back down, his eyes where back to normal and he was wrapping it with some gauze and tape.

"You should be more careful out there." He noted turning to look at you once he had finished his job.

"I'm sorry I was trying to get to Ah-yi. My ankle was the least of my worries at that moment." You defended yourself.

"I understand, but if something happened to you i-" (we.) "We don't know what we'd do."

You chuckled at the "we". You'd gotten used to his monster, you treated him like a friend and You never kissed hyun-soo while he wasn't in control.

You smiled and hugged the boy "I'll be more careful then. Promise." You assured. You felt him peck your cheek, then he leaned back, eyes closed and leaned in to kiss you.

You placed a finger over his lips "open your eyes." And he did. Just as you expected they were blue. You raised an eyebrow, and in a second your hyun-soo was back.

You pecked his lips and messed his hair a bit.

(Just once!) (Actually, shut up.)

#fanfiction #sweet home netflix #sweet home imagines #sweet home x reader #sweet home #cha hyunsu x reader #cha hyunsoo #cha hyun soo

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fangirl-dot-com · 4 months

Text

Grill the Grid

Guys, I'm sorry this is so short. I've had a bout of writers block but still wanted to get another chapter out. I will be going back to working on the regular chapters soon! But enjoy this take on Grill the Grid!

Like always - comments, questions, concerns, reblogs, and likes are appreciated! Much love :D

Key for this chapter: regular text - just normal speaking bold - words on the flip boards italics - scene change bold italics - the narrator lady

Episode One: Radio Show

A quick snapshot of each driver shows up before the opening title of “Grill the Grid” crosses the screen.

You quickly showed up and clapped your hands.

“Welcome ladies and gents to another season of Drive to Survive.” You showed a cheeky smile as you winked to the camera.

“Can you please state your name and what team you drive for?”

You sighed as you thought. “Christian is going to kill me if I can't remember all of it.” You looked back at the camera. “My name is Y/n L/n and I drive for the Honda RBPT Oracle Red Bull Racing Formula One Team.”

“That is correct.”

Your eyes widened as you started to laugh. “I didn’t think I’d get that.”

The lady behind the camera smiled. “Max didn’t get the entire thing.”

You stared at the camera like you were on the office before turning to someone off camera to the side. “Do I get a point for that?”

The video now cut to Max.

Max had his hands on his side, head down before he looked back up.

He had a nervous smile as he tried to think. “Yeah, I don’t know. Red Bull Racing?” He shrugged as multiple people around him laughed.

“It’s actual Honda RBPT Oracle Red Bull Racing.”

Max rolled his eyes. “How is anyone supposed to remember that?”

“Y/n did.”

“Of course.”

Words flashed on the screen signaling to viewers the actual start of the episode. Multiple familiar faces showed as they all stood next to a board with multiple flaps of paper.

Lando smugly looked at the title and then to the camera. “I got this in the bag.”

“How do you think you’ll do?”

Oscar was now on screen. “Uhhhhh.” He didn’t have time to answer.

“I think I’ll do ok. I’m not too familiar with other team’s radios, but I can try?” A red-clad Monegasque questioned himself.

The drivers all flipped the first page.

--He better get me more stroopwaffles after that. Asshole--

You flipped the first page and barely glanced at it before answering. “Lando.”

“Lando.” Max also flipped.

Oscar, Daniel, Charles, and Carlos at once, “Lando.”

Lando just stared into the camera. “Me?”

You smiled back at the camera. “This was at Zandvoort right? After Max kinda bumped him.”

“He pushed me off the track! Bumped is an understatement.” Lando now flipped the next page and leaned back to laugh. “Y/n.”

--Speed. I am Speed. One winner, 19 losers. I eat losers for breakfast--

Max, once again, barely glanced before answering, “Y/n.”

Lance looked around trying to get a hint. He couldn’t find one. “Logan? I know he’s watched the Cars movies.”

Logan laughed as well before shaking his head. “Y/n.”

“Me.” Your face flushed red. “Truthfully, I didn’t know the radio was on.”

Oscar made a noise as he thought. “I want to say Logan because he recently watched that. But my heart wants to say Y/n.”

“Is that your final answer.”

“Yes.”

“That’s correct.”

Fernando, Carlos, Daniel, and Alex flipped the page. “Y/n.”

--This is what she gets for telling me to use my mirrors. AHA! Does she even have her driver’s license?--

“Aha! This is Daniel.” You stood looking at the next page. “So in quali, he almost hit me in turn four during my flying lap and I told him to use his mirrors in the race. Well, he overtook me in the first lap and I fell behind.” Your smile disappeared as you looked right into the camera. “And yes, I have my driver’s license.”

Daniel almost fell to his knees as he read the next one. His gummy smile almost took over his face. “This is me to Y/n.”

Max just looked lost. “Who said this?”

“Daniel.”

“Oh.”

Episode Two: Champions Part 2

“So do you know what’s next?”

You looked confused as you looked around the empty space. “Well there’s no board here?”

Charles shrugged. “It could be anything. I certainly hope that this season we won’t have to list the champions in some order again.”

Max looked around with a confused look. “Again?”

Lewis rolled his eyes. “Man I knew I should have gone back and actually memorized them.”

“There’s no way someone is getting all of them. Sebastian is gone.” Lando shrugged.

It was now back to Charles who looked a bit more pale. A loud beep sounded on a views screen as he looked down.

You once again clapped. “I knew all those Wikipedia pages would come in handy. Are we starting from newest to oldest or oldest to newest.”

“Any way you want.”

You looked up in thought as you started to list. “Ok. Max was in 2023, 2022, 2021. Then Lewis in 2020, 2019, 1028, 2017. Nico won in 2016 then it was back to Lewis in ’15 and ’14. Seb won from 2013 to 2010…”

Max sighed before he started. “Uh, me in 2023 to 2021. Then Lewis until 2014.”

“Incorrect. Nico won in 2016.”

Max hummed. “Uh, Nico in ’16. Then Lewis to ’14. I know Seb won in 2013.”

It was back to you. “And then Michael Schumacher again in 2010, which was his first with Ferrari. Then it was Hakkinen in ’99 and ’98. Uh, Villeneuve in 1997 who was preceded by Hill in 1996. Then it was back to Schumi in ’95 and ’94.”

Lando looked lost.

Charles was still pale but he tried. “It was Max, Lewis, Nico, Lewis again. Then Seb then Lewis again?”

“You’re forgetting another Mercedes Driver.”

Charles looked even more confused. “Uh.”

“Jensen Button in 2009.”

“He was in Mercedes?” Charles just ended up walking off.

Back to you. “Mario Andretti was the last American in 1978. Niki and Hunt danced around from 1977 to 1976. Then it was Fittipaldi, Stewart, Fittpaldi, Stewart, Rindt, Stewart respectfully in 1975, 1974, 1973, 1972, 1971, and 1970.”

Oscar looked as if he was having a stroke.

Logan ran a hand down his face. “I only know Andretti in 1978 and then Phil Hill in 1961. You know. Go America!”

Fernando tried but couldn’t get past the nineties. Yet he had a smile on his face. “Y/n got all of these right, correct?”

“She was the only one.”

“Shut up, no she wasn’t.” Lando didn’t believe it.

“Of course she did.” Max could only chuckle. “She would brag and brag about this in the plane.”

“And then Ascari in 1952, then Fangio in 1951, and finally Farina in 1950!” You had a proud look on your face. “I knew I could do it. Did I miss any?”

“Nope.”

Episode Three: Guess These Headlights

Charles, who had now recovered from his bout of PTSD, suddenly looked excited. “Now here is something I can do.”

“Are you a car guy?”

“Definitely.” Carlos responded with a smug look. “I grew up around cars.”

“I mean. I know my McLarens?” Oscar questioned. “This is going to be hard.”

Lando looked ready. “Let’s get this going.”

You looked determined. “Bring it on.” You flipped the first page. “Ah. That’s a classic. A Ferrari F40.” You turned back to the camera. “If I didn’t have my Porsches, I would have bought an F40.” A far away thoughtful look crossed your face. “Maybe I’ll still get one. I’ll ask Charles. He can get me one.”

Charles quickly answered “F40” and then flipped. “Ah. This is McLaren P1.”

“McLaren P1,” Oscar answered. “The logo is in the headlights. Pretty helpful.”

Daniel flipped the next one and stood back, hands on his hips. “I know Max has this car. But I can’t remember the name.”

Lance finally looked as though he knew what it was. “This is the Aston Valkyrie.”

Fernando also guessed it correctly. “Aston Valkyrie.”

Next, Carlos easily got the next one. “La Ferrari. I wanted one.”

“Did you get one.”

Carlos nodded his head before answering. “No.”

Max flipped through the pages very quickly. “Ah! I know this one. Y/n has two of these. It’s the Porsche 9-11’s.”

“Y/n’s Porsche. The 9-11 model,” Alex responded.

“I see these in my garage since Y/n’s apartment didn’t come with one, so she puts her’s in mine. It’s the Porsche 9-11,” Logan had a happy smile as he knew one. The next one, he didn’t know.

“Not a clue.” Charles, Oscar, and Daniel all said as they flipped.

Max took a minute to look at the X looking headlights. He hummed. “Y/n was just showing me a TikTok with this car. Says she wants one someday.”

You had a giant grin on your face as you looked at the headlights.

“Do you know what this car is?”

You rolled your eyes. “Of course I know. It’s the 3 million dollar Ferrari V12 Engine Apollo Project Evo. There are currently 10 of them only in the world, and they are all owned.”

“Do you have one of them?”

You only smirked as you looked into the camera.

Max still stood next to his board, eyes to the sky as he really thought. His eyebrows raised as he remembered the answer. “This is like...the Apollo E car?”

“That is correct. Now, does Y/n own one of these? She didn’t give us an answer.”

Max looked like a deer caught in headlights. “Uh. No comment?”

Episode Four: Random Skills

“Ok. For this challenge you have to guess what driver has this skill.”

“Easy.” Came from Lando.

You looked around confused. “I don’t think I have any skills.”

“Do I even have a skill for them to use?” Lewis questioned himself.

“First skill. Which driver is known for playing the piano.”

“Sharl,” you smirked. “Easy.”

“Charles.” Lance, Fernando, and Daniel all answered.

“Me.” The Monegasque had a smile on his face.

Oscar looked up. “Is it Y/n? She looks like she can play the piano.”

“He said that? I don’t know if that’s a compliment or an insult.” You shrugged.

“Which drivers claims to be able to hit a hole in one at the Monte Carlo Golf Course.”

Max rolled his eyes. “I know Lando has claimed, but I’m going to say Carlos.”

Carlos looked lost. “Me? I don’t know if I’ve said that though. Maybe Lando?”

Logan answered, “Lando?”

Lando also looked lost. “Me?”

“No.”

“Who is it then?” You questioned. Lando and Carlos had been your guess.

“It is Pierre Gasly.”

Lando huffed. “Get out of here.”

The man in question had a guilty smile. “I forgot I said that. Let’s say it’s still true.”

You looked eager to get on with the game. You wanted to win that trophy.

“Which driver has set a drive time around the Daytona International Speedway at 1 minute and 40 seconds. Which is only 8 seconds slower than the lap record.”

“Oh, I didn’t know I would get on here for this category. It’s me right?”

“Correct, Logan.”

You took a little while to guess. “I’m gonna say Logan. Sounds like a very American thing to do at Daytona. And his brother drove for NASCAR right?”

“Correct.”

Your fist pumped the air.

Oscar looked elated at this question. “It’s Logan. I was there when he did it.” A big smile crossed his face.

Lance looked around in thought. “Uhhhhh. Lando? I don’t know.”

Lando also looked happy, as he seemed to know the answer. “It’s Logan right? Yeah, Logan. Final answer.”

“Are there any geography questions this season, or…” Max drew out the last syllable as he laughed with the others. He suddenly went cold stare. “I’m being serious.”

“Which driver knows how to moon walk?”

Fernando squinted his eyes as he thought before shrugging his shoulders. “It’s one of the young ones right? Yuki?”

Yuki was also as lost as Fernando. “I wish it was me. Maybe Lando? He DJ’s right?”

“It’s not Lando. But it is a younger driver.”

“I should know this after she made me play Just Dance for three hours one time. It’s Y/n.” Logan looked put off at his mention of the dance off.

Oscar also looked bored as he also brought it up. “Yeah, it’s Y/n. I threw Just Dance out after she left. No more.”

Max rubbed his face. “She plays it with P whenever she comes over. They play the same one over and over again. Y/n.”

Charles had a far off look, like one of an older man who suddenly was hit with PTSD from war. He whispered, “We don’t mention moonwalk. Not after her and Arthur…” He never finished as he walked off again.

You had a shit-eating grin on your face. “Me! And I tried to teach it to Oscar, Lando, Logan, Max, Charles, Arthur…” You just seemed to keep going and going. They finally had to stop you before you kept going on about the Just Dance discography.

Bloopers

You stood in front of the camera with one of the que things that snap. “And action! Do you even say that anymore? And I thought this was an actual set. I might have cried when I saw the green screen.”

Beep

The camera showed Max creeping in as you continued listing all of the champions in order. He looked over at the camera like was on the office. “Is she still going?”

Beep

Logan kept touching his hair and the makeup lady would slap his hands away to fix it. “NASCAR drivers don’t have to go through this. I bet they don’t have to list all the freaking Formula 1 champions in order.” He leaned in and made a gesture. “See. All they have to do is kiss a brick and they get one when they win.”

Beep

Oscar smiled as he looked around, honestly excited to get this over with. “I think I’m finally ready for redemption. This should be easy.”

The camera cut to him after ever he finished filming. “I take it back. That was not easy. You guys really need to find better questions.”

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joonsytip · 3 months

Text

Withering for You || Seungcheol- Part 4

Pairings: Seungcheol x Fem!Reader

Genre: Angst, Fluff, Smut, CEO! Seungcheol au, Husband! Seungcheol au, Wife! Reader au, Music Teacher! Reader au, Arranged Marriage au, College Sweetheart au, Exes to Lovers au

Synopsis: When you are arranged married to the man, whose heart you had broken years ago, even dreaming about mending things seems next to impossible when he has been holding grudge for all these only to return it to you tenfold.

Warnings (specific to this part): drama, crying, profanities, everyone is hurt and sad, everything is on rocks, mentions of infidelity (doesn't happen to though), mention of alcohol consumption, betrayal, italics represents occurrences in past

Word Count: 6.3k

TAGLIST FOR THIS SERIES IS CLOSED!

Banner credits to my baby @hoeforhao <3

[ SVT Masterlist ] [ SVT Flick - Fic Masterlist ]

They say betrayal is worse than death if you taste it from someone you trust, someone you love. It's stingy, it's sickening, it's scathing.

You have always believed in soulmates, entitled Seungcheol to that word since you've known him, even wanted to make promises of eternity with him. But you should have seen the signs, should have never crossed the lines. Must not have tried to slip into the loopholes.

But you got blinded by greed, a hopeful stance of getting back together. Was it so wrong to wish a happily ever after with the one you have loved selflessly? Apparently it was.

"Sit.", you tell Seungcheol and the later obeys.

And as he does so his eyes fall on a very familiar document kept on the table. Instantly, he goes numb.

You observe him for a moment and play the recordings Jiah had given you. Midway, a panic stricken Seungcheol runs to you and pauses the recording.

He grabs your arms and says in desperation, "I didn't do all this Y/N. I admit I had planned all this because I wanted revenge but please trust me, it wasn't me."

"Unhand me.", you command him coldly, "Your touch disgusts me."

Seungcheol looks at you alarmingly before freeing your arms. He thinks of ways to convince you because in actuality, like he said he had planned it all but something out of scope happened. He fell in love with you again so long gone were all of those thoughts and schemes.

"What goes around, surely comes around.", you let out a chuckle, "Maybe that's why, I'm going through this. I get that you wanted to trample me upon. It's fair, to think about what you've been through because of me, I could have understood.", you look at him, "You could have handed me the divorce papers on our anniversary. Could have had other women and it would have wounded me. But-"

The tears pooling at the corner of your eyes are streaming down, "But how could you stoop so low? Knowing how much this academy matters to me, knowing what music means to me, you went out to attack my soul."

"No Y/N, I was a fool, please please", Seungcheol is crying as well, choking on his words, "It was wrong of me but I would never--"

"They are calling me a thief. Because of this incident those out there are questioning my whole career. The career, I've pursued after fighting the odds, after struggling for years. The one thing that is entirely mine.", your eyes turn darker as you say, "You could have rather killed me, Seungcheol."

Seungcheol gasps and shakes his head frantically.

"Even if I clear my name today, there will be people who'll still doubt my ability. Some out there would assume that I might be guilty and just because I belong to an influential family, I must have pushed everything under the rug with money.", you are hurting yourself with every word you utter at this point, clutching your chest, "My image is tainted, my career is ruined. They will never look at me the same way."

"I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry Y/N", he gets on his knees and clasps his hands, pleading, "I would do anything to clear your name. I'd do anything to win back your trust just give me one chance--"

You take his hands off you saying, "I have always loved you, Seungcheol. Back then, even now, I have chosen you. But none of that matters now. You have stabbed me in the back but I'll be one to pay the price. I thought you'd be different but these genes run in your family. I can't even blame Jiah. You Choi's are no different from her--", you halt.

"What do you mean?", Seungcheol asks confused.

"As I said none of that matters now. You are so petty that you acted out the whole thing. You don't love me and from today onwards I won't either.", you answer him, taking out the wedding ring from your dress pocket, "Here, I'm giving you what you wanted.", you take his hand and place the ring on his palm, "Congratulations! This marriage didn't get through it's first year. But I have a present for you. I have filed for divorce, the papers will be sent to you as soon as they're ready."

Seungcheol is at loss of words. He's unable to comprehend the situation. He wants to stop you but on what ground? The irreversible damage is already done.

"I have all of my belongings sent over.", you inform him, "And if you're planning to create a fuss about the divorce and what's gonna happen after the conference, head on. I won't be giving up like last time. I'll see through the end of it."

"It's happening again", he tells himself and sounds so broken when he speaks through his wavering voice, "Please don't leave me again."

"I had no choice, I was forced to leave you back then", you mutter under your breath, making it impossible for him to hear, "I was willing to stay this time but I have to leave, this time for my sake."

While you gather the rest of your belongings, Seungcheol stands there helpless. And as you walk out of the house, he watches you take away the life of his adobe with you.

Seungcheol numbly tunes in to watch the press conference. He sees you on the screen, out of his reach, out of his life. He listens to each word you say. How sad you look as you address the matter. Even though your legal team briefs the journalists, his eyes are glued to you. He observes how you don't explicitly mention him or the Choi enterprise but throw sublte hints to catch on.

But you make it obvious at the end of the conference by announcing your divorce to Seungcheol.

"I have filed for divorce against Choi Seungcheol and I would like to refrain you all from associating me with the Choi's in future."

Seungcheol is immediately thrown under the bus. People who were coining you as a thief are now praising you and busy portraying him as the villain.

But mopping won't do him any good. His mind reel backs to every word you have said before leaving. He needs to get answers to some questions. Most importantly, he has to get you back.

The next few days goes by Seungcheol handling the legal charges against him which are minor because he digs out enough evidence to prove that he wasn't involved in the slander and Jiah is the main culprit, adding exceptional charges to the list that would nearly ruin her and damage her company's reputation.

The Choi enterprise faces reputation loss as well which results in their stock plummeting and the board of directors complaining about the situation. But being humungous in business, the impact isn't uncontrollable and since Seungcheol is mentally exhausted his father lets him loose taking matters into his hands for the time being.

Everything is manageable or bearable except for the divorce papers which he has received on your first anniversary, that sits coldly on his office table.

"The house I bought is an hour drive from here and I'm planning to stay there for some time, just to take my mind off of things." you say fishing out your car keys, "I have saved my new contact number to your phones."

"But are you sure you don't want us to be there with you?", your mother asks worriedly.

"At least let us help you shift--"

"Dad, I have lived alone before as well. Plus Chan and my friends are gonna help me with the unpacking.", you move over to hug both of your parents, "Visit me after it's done. Plus I'm planning to throw a cozy house warming house, not soon though."

"We're proud of you.", your mother says patting your head.

"I'm sorry for all the troubles and stress you've been through for the past year.", you mumble, quickly wiping your tears, "I'll be fine, no looking back promise."

"We have always trusted you, just take care of yourself and call us.", your father says kissing your forehead.

Chan waits for you by the car and he doesn't let you drive throughout the time it takes to reach your new house. As your friends help you settle into your new home, you are grateful to them for keeping you distracted and not bringing up Seungcheol.

"I'm sorry, Kwan. The academy had to face such an incident because of me.", you say hanging your head low in shame because you don't want anyone to see your tears, the can of beer in your hand remains unsipped, "I have decided to take some time off, please handle the academy and it's okay if you want me to backout. I'll transfer my shares to you."

Seungkwan blames the atmosphere for the tears in his eyes. He wipes them and sits beside you, "I couldn't have done it alone. The reason the academy exists is because we both had given it our all. So take all the time you want but you'll have to return."

You lean onto him and it's your brother who comes to wipe your tears.

"I'm so sorry Chan.", you speak through the tears, "I should have listened to you. I never thought that Seu--", you go quiet because it pains you to even say his name.

Everyone in room goes silent. It's not haunting rather comforting. But the successive ringing of the phones cause a mild commotion.

"Wonwoo keeps on calling us.", Eunsoo mutters, switching off her phone.

"Just tell him that I'm fine.", you tell her, "I'll give him a call later. I haven't visited Wonseok lately so I need to talk to him anyways."

It's amusing, how the night changes.

Seungcheol is distressed. He realises you are not the only one he has lost, he has lost Ms. Oh's empathy, he has also lost precious friend Wonwoo as well.

Wonwoo is back to his stoic self, the version he was when Seungcheol met him first. Only talks business with him, leaves as soon as he's done with assigned work. No more late night drinks, no more taking shots, none of the banter.

He watches you laugh as Wonwoo tells you something animatedly. He watches how your eyes are dull even though your lips are stretched.

Seungcheol had overheard Wonwoo talking to someone on the phone about his brother so he decides to visit him seperately just to check on him. He didn't expect to see you there, making him question since when you knew about Wonseok.

Your face falls when you're suddenly interrupted by Seungcheol's presence. He stands in front of you wordless, you don't bother to strike any conversation with him either.

"I'll get going, let me know if you need anything else.", you tell Wonwoo and turn around walk away.

"Y/N", Seungcheol says, "Can I please talk to you?"

You crane your neck to meet his gaze, "I don't think we have any business with each other. Do me a favour and just sign the divorce papers."

"I can't.", Seungcheol speaks out without missing a beat, "I need you Y/N, please give me a chance, let me make things right. I promise I won't let you down anymore."

"Enough with this act, don't assume you could fool me twice. I'm done with you.", you move around so now you're facing him again.

"You've changed your number.", he says meekly, "I don't get to see you anymore. That house haunts me, it's not the same without you."

You step in, closing the gap within you two, "You're facing the consequences of your actions. Stop acting like a fucking victim.", you spat out before walking out.

Wonwoo is torn. He doesn't want to take sides, it's even more difficult to see both of his dear friends grieving and suffering but there's nothing he could do.

"Wonseok is going through a series of surgeries because his condition had worsened and Y/N has been paying for them.", Wonwoo informs Seungcheol and before he could ask, Wonwoo adds, "You're already paying me more than I should be so I didn't want to burden you more. She had accidentally found out about Wonseok one day and decided to help me out even though I wasn't ready to accept it. She was determined and I couldn't stop her."

Seungcheol isn't surprised rather he is confused. This version of yours is what he was habituated to when you were dating until you convinced him it wasn't on the day you broke up. Something isn't adding up. Something about your nature and the way you act to what you had said that day are contradicting. You aren't mean-hearted, you are a giver so why did you years ago do something so bizarre, the thought is unsettling.

"She has been taking some time off from the academy, no one knows when she'll be back. She is so affected by the incident that she was ready to give up on the academy. The one she had built from scratch with her blood, sweat and tears." Wonwoo speaks disappointedly, "Do you realise what you have done?"

Seungcheol is ashamed, there's an unhealing pain in his heart thinking about you, about how he should be the one aiding you in your tough time but he can't because he's the reason you're in agony.

"As you know, I had also hated Y/N for what she had done. And now that you see me being friends with her is not because she's paying for Wonseok.", Wonwoo halts and takes a breath, choosing his words carefully, "It goes far beyond that. You have always been heedful, I think it's time for you to be vigilant as well. The truth might be far from what you've believed it to be."

Wonwoo doesn't spare another second on his watch as he walks away ignoring the desperate calls of his name.

Seungcheol's mind is not in place anymore.

Your thoughts are everywhere. Peace and happiness are some of the things you haven't gotten to feel lately. Though you've decided to spend time alone at home, the loneliness is caving you in.

Maybe tonight you're feeling a little more lonely than usual. Maybe you shouldn't miss the person who had pushed you to the edge of the cliff. Maybe you shouldn't be good with dates. Maybe you shouldn't trace your thumb on the calendar reminiscing about the day, you both had made it official years ago.

The damned tears aren't stopping, your heart isn't healing.

The bell rings and you are surprised because no one is supposed to visit you today. Quickly wiping your eyes and cheeks you don't bother to check the monitor and open the door.

At the other side of the threshold stands Seungcheol. Your red eyes gape at him as he looks at you shivering from driving all the way here in the snow.

"What are you doing here?"

You know getting your new address and number wouldn't be a big deal to Seungcheol given his network runs deeper.

"Can you let me in atleast, I'm freezing."

You cross over your arms and step aside. He saunters in and wanders off to have a tour of the house. He stops when he senses the glare you're sending him.

"If you realise that this house too plain for your taste you can always contact me. We're best in the business.", Seungcheol says as his lips purse in a line.

"I wonder from where did you get the audacity to come here?", you ask plainly.

"Just wanted to see you", he admits, "I miss you, Y/N."

You scoff at his words.

"Also, there's something you left behind, I found it while going through the drawers.", Seungcheol fishes out a notebook from his inner coat pocket.

You immediately recognise the object, raising your hand flat for him to handover it to you.

"I instantly got reminded of you always carrying it and scribbled down if anything came to your mind. Seems like you had kept this notebook from prior to university days.", he hands over the notebook and touches your hand gently in the process.

His touch turns to strong grip and he doesn't let go.

"Thanks.", you say trying to free your hand, "You should leave now."

The wedding ring on his finger feels cold on your skin.

"I know you remember what day it is today.", he says pulling you closer so that now you're colliding into him, your faces an inch apart. Your eyes are wide and the notebook falls as you're grabbing onto his shoulder out of reflex.

He has an undeniable look of longing in his eyes. You should just push him away, even kick him out but you find yourself frozen.

"I still remember falling in love with you, every moment of it.", he whispers, his gaze switching between your eyes and lips.

"So I do, Cheol.", his nickname slips out of your mouth so casually, there's a pause before you speak, "Why did you have to ruin it all?"

"I regret it all.", he gently holds your face, "But I realised that I never stopped loving you otherwise why would I despise you if I hadn't been in love in the first place."

"You could have broken my heart but you went after my soul."

"You did the same to me years ago. You took my soul away and I became just a shell.", he isn't complaining, just letting you know how difficult it was for him as well, "I planned everything to get back to you but what wasn't planned was my feelings resurfacing, falling in love with you all over again. I had forgotten all the schemes, had forgotten the reason why I hated you in the first place."

When he rests his forehead against yours, you close your eyes basking in the moment. What he did was definitely beyond any excuse but Seungcheol isn't entirely at fault. The fact that he was ready to start again with you after how you had treated him years ago proves the truth behind his words. The difference is you were forced to act out but he wasn't. He chose to destroy you.

So your eyes snap open and you're pushing him away.

"Leave Seungcheol.", you step away, "And never come back again."

Seungcheol sighs, "What should I do for you take me back? If you want I would never show myself in the vicinity of the academy. I wouldn't even ask you anything remotely related to your works or the academy. I'll stay all out of it, I promise."

"Nothing you do would make me go back to you.", your words taste bitter in your mouth, "We are not meant to be, we're not good for each other."

That is basically you firmly rejecting him, letting him aware that he has axed the mended fence.

Seungcheol smiles sadly, "Only if I could show you my heart and mind."

He then leaves with a heavy heart.

The next few days goes by Seungcheol racking his thoughts to make up his mind. Every time he thinks about you wanting to desperately cut ties with him, he relents. He laments on himself for what he has caused. At nights when he deliberately stays late, he mentally prepares himself to sign those papers because that's the only way to atone for his sins.

But those divorce papers get through every night without getting signed. Because when Seungcheol thinks he's ready that's when the realisation gnaws on him that he's actually not, that he'll never be.

And it gets harder each time he tries.

So one night, he lets his intrusive thoughts get the best of him and he ends up calling you.

"I'm trying but I can't bring myself to sign those papers", he speaks into the phone clutching it hard followed by a shaky breath, "I really want to give you what you want but whenever I think about not having you in my life, my willingness deters."

You stay quiet.

"Sorry to disturb you. Don't know what I was thinking. Please take care of yourself, bye.", he hangs up and collapses back on the chair.

Wonwoo watches through the blinds and he isn't new to this. Years ago Seungcheol had gone into a spiral, had almost given up on living post the breakup and now it hurts Wonwoo to see the history repeating itself.

So this time he promises to intervene for both of your sake, specially Seungcheol.

He has two things on his to-do list and though he isn't sure what the outcome will be, he's going to do them. He gathers everyone and let's them know of his plan.

"Mingyu, Eunsoo, Seungkwan", his gaze sweeps on the three, "You're gonna go and convince Y/N."

"I'll go to uncle and aunt.", Wonwoo says.

Eunsoo looks at him questionably, "We get our part. But are you sure your friend's gonna be okay?"

"Most importantly, I'm not sure how this will end because both of them are unpredictable as fuck.", Mingyu adds.

Seungkwan who was silent the whole time, speaks, "Guys, let's go for it. We will handle the aftermath.", he looks at Wonwoo, "You'll have to take care of Seungcheol because he's gonna hurt the most."

"It's better to be over it, Seungcheol deserves to know."

"What's wrong with you guys?", You ask absolutely astonished. All of your friends have suddenly busted into your house and are now advocating you on something that is supposed to be out of their box.

"Why are you suddenly siding with Seungcheol?", you say with a frown, "I'm feeling betrayed. I'm gonna call Chan now."

Eunsoo and Mingyu break into cold sweat knowing how scary your brother can be. Seungkwan sighs looking at the other two and gets that he has no other way but to sort down to what he's best at. He says, "Y/N, do you think we'd ever think ill of you? Do you think we'd be at your door because suddenly we felt emphatic towards Seungcheol? That's how lowly you think of us?"

The look on Mingyu and Eunsoo's faces are absolute comedic. They didn't expect Seungkwan would pull out his trump card.

Your gaze is unwavering when you say, "This won't work on me you know right?"

Seungkwan smiles, "Of course I know but we also know that you love Seungcheol and won't be happy without him. So we're saying all this just for your sake, not his, not anyone else's."

"You're wr-"

"You had 7 years but you couldn't get over him, even accepted his family just to marry him.", Seungkwan continues, "You had come across so many good men all these years but no one piqued your interest because you only had Seungcheol in your heart."

"Y/N, I did believe him when he said he fell in love again. I had seen the way he looked at you, the way he was protective around you. The way his eyes were always on you, radiating love. It may have started as an act but at some point it became real.", Eunsoo smiles at you, "He loves you."

"But Soo--"

"If you really loathed him, you wouldn't have waited for him to sign those divorce papers, you would have upsurged everything. You have the power to ruin the Chois wholly but you're just buying yourself some time.", Mingyi adds and immediately shifts to hug you, "What Seungcheol did was incredibly wrong, wait he didn't even do it. It was Jiah."

"Are you not getting Jiah did all just to separate you both again?", Seungkwan ask and you look at him wide eyed.

"She had done the exact thing years back and was successful. Please don't let her win again. If she can't have Seungcheol, she has planned all this for you to not have him as well.", Eunsoo voices out her concerns, "Don't let all these heartbreaks, tears and sacrifices go in vain just because of some misunderstandings. Don't do something you'd regret because you didn't mend it when you had a chance."

Your heart sinks at their words.

"Take your time but choose what you think is the best for you.", Eunsoo rubs your back gently, "Rationality shouldn't always take the stance, sometimes hearts should be listened to."

You take a deep breath and say, "Fine guys, I'll think about it."

The smile on their faces are unmatchable.

Seungcheol is worried when he receives a call from his mother asking him to urgently come to their house. Wonwoo is already waiting by the car and though Seungcheol asks if he knows anything he stays tight lipped throughout the ride.

"I'll be waiting for you right here. Call me if you need me.", Wonwoo says with an intone and for some reason it doesn't resonate well with Seungcheol.

He is led into his father's study where he sees both of his parents waiting. They are heartbroken seeing their only son. Seungcheol has lost weight, accumulated bags under red eyes, appearance unkempt.

"Take a seat.", his father says, "I have something to tell you and it's regarding Y/N."

Seungcheol immediately perks up at your mention. An eerie silence falls upon the room. Seungcheol's anxious gaze searches for his parents'.

"Y/N was forced to break up with you years ago. I had made her do so.", his father admits.

Seungcheol freezes. He thinks he's hearing things that are not supposed to make any sense.

"Ever since I had started the business I had been diligent to it. Dedication and honesty does account for success but so also being money minded and cunning. As years went by that consistency and success made me cling to riches, fame and status that came along with it.", his father says as he takes a seat gesturing him to do the same. "You must be remembering that we were facing financial crisis because one of our major investor had withdrawn. It had affected us greatly."

Seungcheol nods, "We were on the verge of facing bankruptcy."

"Since Jiah's father runs a finance company, we had made small sort of deals previously but that time the amount required was large and no one was willing to help us not even her father. But later Jiah came to me and offered me a deal."

"W-What deal?"

"That she would convince her father to provide us support only if", there's an ominous pause before Mr. Choi looks at him and says, "I remove Y/N out of your life."

A tear falls from his eye, as he hears the tale of betrayal from none other but his father.

"I have never liked Y/N, the reason was basic, she didn't belong to our circle. Initially I thought she was just a fling but so I agreed with Jiah."

Seungcheol is numb at this point, he just sorts to listening.

"One day I had brought in Y/N to let her know that she needs to find her way out of your life.", Mr. Choi's gaze falls, "She instantly refused. No matter what I said she wasn't willing to leave you. One meeting turned to two, two turned to three but she was hellbent on not letting you go."

"With Jiah constantly pressurizing me, threatening to nullify the deal if not taken action soon, I became desperate.", he confesses, "So I resorted to one thing I should have never done. I can never forgive myself for that."

You say in utter disbelief, "Why don't you tell your son to breakup with me instead? Stop pestering me, you know we both love each other and Mr. Choi let me make this clear, this is the last time I'm meeting you."

Mr. Choi gives you a sickening smile. He casually says, "Your brother is currently studying in Australia, if I'm not wrong."

You pale instantly, "W-What about him?"

"You're right, this is gonna be our last meeting. If you don't breakup with my son, I'm not sure what I'll do with your brother. What if you don't get to see your dear little brother anymore?"

"Mr. Choi, you can't do this. Please--"

"I'm not here to negotiate. I think you're smart enough to make the right choice. So tell me Y/N, what did you decide?"

You are crying and begging but there's no mercy reserved to spare for you. How are you supposed to choose between your brother and the love of your life? You will have to so you choose what's best for all, you choose both.

"Fine, I'll breakup with Seungcheol. So stay away from my brother."

Mr. Choi smiles in mirth, "You made the right descision. Rest assured."

With job being done, he is walking out of the hall when your call of his name reaches his ears.

He turns with an incredulous look on his face as he waits for you to speak.

"Promise me that you'll never tell Seungcheol about this incident.", comes your strained voice.

"I wasn't planning to anyways.", Mr. Choi says, "Even better for me, I promise to not tell Seungcheol about any of this."

Seungcheol runs to his father with the intention of doing something unspeakable but he stops right in front of him and collapses on the ground.

"How could you do this?", he sobs uncontrollably, "How could you stoop so low?", he balls his hands into fists and channels the anger on the floor, hitting it again and again that's when his mother steps in to stop him.

He looks at her and say, "How could you not tell me? How could you tolerate your husband even after knowing all this?", he then swats her away.

Getting up, he's gasping for air, unable to comprehend with the pain in his chest and head. Restlessness engulfs him but he doesn't let both of his parents to even touch him.

"I'm ashamed to call you both my parents.", he spats out, "I'll never forgive for ruining our lives. I hope all of this was worth it."

Then he's running out of the house ignoring the calls of his name. Wonwoo is immediately grabbing his friend, making him sit and drink water.

"You also knew but didn't tell me?", Seungcheol asks as fresh tears stream down his face.

"I only came to know recently and Cheol even if I had known, it's not my story to tell.", Wonwoo answers.

It takes Seungcheol over an hour to calm down.

"You don't need to attend me, I'm fine.", Seungcheol says stoicly, "You can go, I have somethings to take care of."

Though Wonwoo refutes but Seungcheol is adamant, leaving no choice for him but to obey his boss.

As soon as Wonwoo gets out of the car, Seungcheol drives off.

You are extremely tired, mentally and today for some reasons are you feel thinned out physically as well.

Staring at the cello, ominous thoughts fill in your mind. Because no matter how hard you try, you are unable to produce anything. There are no notes or no tunes, it's all blank.

And you're scared, what if music doesn't choose you anymore? What if you can't produce anything for the rest of your life? All these possibilities scares you enough to spend sleepless nights. It has disturbed your appetite as well.

Tossing and turning, as you've been doing for nights with minimal sleep at dawn hours, you sit up startled when the doorbell rings.

All the exhaustion is now replaced with concern when you see Seungcheol who continuously weeps at the door.

"What happened? Are you okay?"

Just a shake of head and he keeps on crying.

It's been about twenty minutes since he arrived crying and you're seriously considering about calling Wonwoo.

The way he's visibly hurting, hurts you too and you resort to hug him, patting his back, "If you're hurting because of me, please don't.", you say softly, tears pricking at your eyes subconsciously.

Seungcheol pulls away, looking at you. His sobs stop and the first thing he does is hold your face and kiss you. You're surprised, his lips graze yours but you don't kiss him back. Your hands push his chest and he's detaching himself mumbling a string of apologies.

"It was all for nothing.", he sounds so heartbroken when he speaks, "All those years spent in pain, hatred and resentment towards you, you didn't deserve any of it."

You have an inkling and it doesn't settle well in your bones, "Whatever you're saying is making no sense. Why are you here?"

Seungcheol looks dead in your eyes, "Because I know now. I know what happened all those years ago."

Your soul leaves your body at his words. You never wanted him to find out because you knew it'd tear him apart.

"W-Who told you?"

"Does it matter?"

And your very first instinct is to grab your phone and make a call to his father but Seungcheol doesn't let you. The phone gets snatched from your hands and thrown away somewhere.

"Why did you do it?", he asks and his questions irks you.

You scoff, "Are you seriously asking me why I did it after knowing everything? Seungcheol, I was threatened with my brother's life, what did you expect me to do?"

Seungcheol shakes his head, "No that Y/N. Why did you make dad promise you about not telling me about this?"

"What could I have done Seungcheol?", your voice cracks, "I loved you so much and trust me, I tried everything I could to be with you, to not hurt you but-- it killed me to lie to you. I went through hell and back trying to stop myself from telling you 'no I'm lying, please don't leave, I love you as much as you do'.

"That day I took your heart away.", You exhale sharply, "I didn't want to crush your soul as well, didn't want to make it anymore difficult for you then it already was. I knew how much you looked upto your father, how much you cherished your parents. I didn't want you to fight your family", your heart twinges as you continue, "Though it wasn't possible for me to love again, I prayed that you would move on, meet someone who'd make you forget all the sorrows I gave you. I wished for you to fall in love again and live happily."

You chuckled through your tears, "Won't lie, it would have hurt me but if it assured your happiness I'd have hurt myself all over again, all of the times."

Seungcheol observes you quietly, he absorbs your words to his heart.

"What does that make me, Y/N?", he asks defeated.

"You weren't at fault, Cheol. I chose what it seemed the best for all of us."

"I hated you, married you and plotted revenge. Hurt you and now indirectly lead to something that almost ruined your career.", he speaks as if he's narrating a monologue, "I kept wounding the wounded and siding with the foes."

"Stop blaming yourself. What you did was indeed wrong, you should have never attempted take a blow at my career. But years ago, even after all that you were ready to start again.", you remind him.

Seungcheol completely shuts himself out.

"Till yesterday, I was in a dilemma. They say if you love someone you should let them go. Call me selfish but I couldn't even think of parting ways with you. I wanted to fight for us. I'd have courted you until you got bored of me. I would have waited for a lifetime, even if you'd have moved on.", he avoids eye contact so that his resolution doesn't deter, "But how could I tie you to the people who tried to harm you, harm your family?"

"I won't beg for forgiveness anymore. Honestly, I don't want you to forgive us. If you're having second thoughts about us, discard them. Please just discard me.", he voices out in desperation, "Be selfish and choose yourself this one time."

He takes out a paper from his coat pocket which you recognise very well.

"Till yesterday signing these papers seemed impossible for me but it's surprising, how events turned out to be.", he takes your hand and places the paper saying, "I have signed them. This time I chose what's best for you."

There's a sickening churn in your stomach that makes you realise that there's nothing you can do.

"I love you, Y/N."

The weight of those words fall heavy on you as Seungcheol closes in.

"For one last time, please.", he says holding your face.

You incline towards him and instantly his lips are on yours. One of his hands now settle on your neck firmly as your lips dance on featherly. His other hand is gripping your waist to hold you in place. The saltiness of his tears burn on your tongue, making you suck in a gasp. His kisses you till his heart's content because it's a kiss of goodbye before resting his forehead on yours.

"Don't go", your strained voice whispers, "Please don't go."

Seungcheol whispers back, "I have to. Please don't stop me, I'm not strong enough to refuse you."

The tears stream down your face, "Would nothing I do be enough to stop you?"

"Y/N, please", he pleads, "You were right when you said we're not meant to be because I have only hurt you. I don't deserve you."

"Cheol..."

He steps back and you're suddenly engulfed by coldness.

"The chapter named Choi Seungcheol in your life ends right now.", he balls his hands, grits his teeth, does everything to not let those tears spill, "Since you might not submit the divorce papers, I have already handed over a copy to your attorney."

He turns back, rubbing his chest, the pain is unbearable.

"Cheol, please..."

"It's snowing so don't follow me outside, you'll catch a cold. Goodbye Y/N."

Then he leaves, from your house, apparently from your life.

And you realised not all stories have a happy ending, there's not always a happily ever after.

→ Do not copy, re-post, translate, or share any of my works on other platforms! All stories are copyrighted, joonsytip. ©️

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simplyundeniable98 · 6 months

Text

look at me t.s.

Pairing | Thomas Shelby x Female reader

Summary | When Mrs. Shelby requests Tommy in the room with her for the birth of their first daughter everyone is shocked. Men aren't supposed to be in the room with their wives as they give birth, it's just not how it is supposed to be... well all men aren't Thomas Shelby.

Warnings | Mentions of childbirth, pain obviously she's literally giving birth, maybe ooc Tommy? idk. Reader is a little mean to her doctors but she's in pain cut her some slack. MDNI because I said so. Foul language.

Word Count | .06k

~This is loosely based off of the scene in Queen Charlotte when they won't let George into the room to see Charlotte. If you know what I'm talking about I love you~

All dialogue in italics is spoken in Romani.

"Mrs Shelby forgive me but husbands aren't usually in the room during the birth" The doctor spoke hesitantly as his eyes flicked nervously around the room.

Everyone seemed to speak hesitantly around her. I guess that was what you get when you become a Shelby. Everyone around you is constantly terrified to tell you no or disagree. It was like being royalty in a sort of fucked up way.

Polly Gray cut the doctor a look as she walked over to you and put a reassuring hand on your forehead.

"Polly please" you cried in pain "I need him here." Nothing from the old wive tales could compare to the pain you were feeling. You had been pushing for hours now with Polly at your side but nothing was working. Your daughter simply just would not budge. Polly had made the comment early on about her already showing traits from her father.

"I don't care what usually happens. If Tommy Shelby is not in this room in the next five minutes, I will personally end you." You spoke with a hiss pointing at the doctor.

You weren't usually this aggressive, but given the fact you were in pain and used to getting what you wanted all the time, the circumstances were different.

Polly sighed as she looked down at you and began to head out of the room.

"What's wrong, is she okay?" Tommy spoke immediately as Polly exited the doors of your room.

"She's requesting you Thomas" Polly spoke in Romani so as to not alert the other doctors of your request.

"She wants me in the room with her?" He spoke hesitantly as he looked towards the door.

Polly nodded and Tommy immediately started towards the door.

"I'm sorry Mr. Shelby but I cannot allow you to be in the room." The doctor outside of your door spoke as his eyes flicked down to the floor to avoid Tommy's sharp gaze.

"Tell me, doctor, do you like your job?" Tommy spoke with a raised brow as he waited for his response.

When he didn't reply Tommy bent down to reach his gaze "Hmm? I asked you a question doctor, do you like your job?"

"Yes. Yes I like my job" He murmured still avoiding the sharp blue eyes that were currently staring daggers at the man.

"Well if you intend on staying alive long enough to keep it, I suggest you move out of my way." Tommy stood up straight and tilted his head towards the door.

The doctor nodded and stepped aside, letting Tommy enter the room. "If I hear one more word from anyone about my presence in this room, I will have a peaky blinder on each and every one of your doorsteps first thing tomorrow morning" Tommy spoke before anyone could protest.

"Tommy" you gasped as you finally laid eyes on your husband. "I've been asking for you"

"I know, I know. But I'm here now eh? I'm here now." Tommy bent down to give your forehead a kiss as you winced.

"I cant do this Tommy" you cried "I want it to be over"

Tommy's heart broke at the sight of you. His wife. He wished he could just take all of your pain away and keep it for himself.

Tommy bent down to kneel at the side of your bed as he cradled your face in his hands.

"Look at me. Hey, Look at me, love." He spoke softly as you turned your head to gaze at him with teary eyes.

"You can do this. I know you can. You are the most headstrong women I know, and ill be damned if you give up now." You giggled at his lighthearted teasing and nodded.

"And you don't really have a choice love. This baby has got to come out in one way or another." He smirked at you as you rolled your eyes at your husband.

"Okay Mrs. Shelby its time to push" Your doctor spoke as Tommy placed a kiss on the hand he had ahold of and nodded at you.

"Let's meet our daughter Mrs. Shelby."

#thomas shelby #tommy shelby #peaky blinders #peaky blinder fanfic #cillian murphy x reader smut #cillian murphy #thomas shelby x reader #cillian murphy x reader #peaky blinder imagine

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withwritersblock · 1 month

Text

I Was In Love

~I Was In Love by Born Without Bones~

Author's Note: I think this may actually be my favorite song and one shot I've done so far :) oh also italics as always are flashbacks Summary: Luke and Y/N have a complicated history: Quinn is stuck in the middle of it Warnings: implied smut, swearing, some other things I probably should add but I'm not sure Word Count: 5,485 Luke Hughes x fm!reader

He was only supposed to walk her back to her dorm building, but then it started raining. There was no way she was going to let him walk back to his dorm building with the pouring rain. So he stepped inside, it was innocent until it wasn’t.

She wasn’t sure how it happened but his lips were sucking the skin right above her collarbone as his hands were massaging her breast through the lace of her bra. She panted hard as she pulled her fingers through the thickness of his curls.

He lifted his head and looked down towards her, a smile on his lips as he kissed her urgently. “Is this okay?” he asked as he looked deeply into her eyes.

“Very,” she muttered before she sealed her lips over his once more. She tugged at the hem of his black button up. He stood up as he began unbuttoning it, a wide toothy grin on his lips as he looked over her gorgeous frame. She bit her lip excitedly as he leaned towards her again, the shirt completely unbuttoned, his muscles in full view. He kissed her lips briefly before he flung the shirt away from his body.

Her hands wrapped around the base of his neck, running her fingers through his curls as he kept one hand beside her head as he was holding himself up and his other hand was gripping her hip. He slowly pulled his lips from hers, meeting her gaze for a brief second as he began to trail wet kisses from her jawline and lower and lower on her body. He wanted to taste every part of her and she wanted to feel his tongue on every single part of her body.

The rest of the night went by in a blurr. She never thought that her longest friend, her best friend, would be in her bed doing things she could only allow her mind to go. But he did and it was the best sex she ever had.

She woke up to see him already awake and staring towards the ceiling. She smiled softly as she looked towards him, but the frown on his lips slipped the smile off of hers instantly.

“Are you okay?” she asked as she rubbed her hand across her eyes.

“I’m sorry,” he mumbled as he stood up searching the room for his shirt and pants that he came into her room wearing. His boxers the only thing covering his frame, “We were drunk, we shouldn’t have done that, I’m sorry,”

“Well yeah but what if we could be-”

He pulled his jeans up his frame, quickly buttoning them as he avoided her gaze. “You’re the last person I wanted to have a drunken hookup with, I’m sorry.” he said while shaking his head. He picked his shirt up from the floor as he covered his frame, “Can we talk about this later? I’m running late for practice,” he offered as he quickly slipped on his shoes and left the dorm room.

She sat up straight, feeling her eyes well up in tears. It was as if her heart completely shattered at that moment. All she has ever wanted was to be something more with Luke. She was madly in love with him and maybe that was her turning point, last night. She thought maybe that meant he was in love with her too.

That was five months ago. They never spoke about it again, rarely saw each other again. Luke had moved to New Jersey to pursue his dream of playing in the NHL. They only briefly saw each other during passing at school before he left. She avoided him the entire time and it felt like he was avoiding her too.

Except today was the first day that she was going to see him again. A few years ago, the older Hughes brother’s bought the lakehouse that was directly next to their longest family friends growing up. Y/N and her family. She was driving her own car towards her lakehouse, like she’s done since she was sixteen. Except the entire time she was filled with dread as her boyfriend, Kyle, was sitting in the passenger seat beside her.

They had only been together for three months but her parents agreed to let him join and she was excited to spend the time with Kyle but also hating the idea that she would have to see Luke and Kyle in the same room.

She nervously tapped her fingers against the steering wheel as they pulled into her spot in the garage as it was big enough to hold two spots.

“So these guys that own the place next door, are we going to be seeing them a lot?” Kyle asked as he unbuckled his seatbelt. Y/N widened her eyes slightly as she forced a smile.

“They should be inside right now actually,” Y/N mumbled as she reluctantly unbuckled her seatbelt. She didn’t want to see Luke again, except every part of her body felt weak knowing he was only a few doors away.

“Good, I mean it’s good to meet them now,” he muttered as he pushed the passenger door open and climbed out of the car. She followed in pursuit. He waited for her at the door to enter her house with a kind smile. She returned it as she wrapped her arms around his chest giving him a quick hug.

“I’m excited to spend the next few weeks with you,” she mumbled against her chest. He kissed the side of her head before he pulled away. They stepped inside the house, “Can you actually put our suitcases and stuff in my room, right over there?” she asked, suddenly wanting to see the brothers by herself first.

Kyle nodded excitedly before he stepped out of the door towards the car again. Y/N took a deep breath as she walked through the hallway leading towards her kitchen.

The three boys were hanging out around the kitchen island. Quinn was sitting on a barstool chair holding a seltzer against his lips. Jack was sitting on the countertop staring at his phone. Luke was leaning against the countertop as he was snacking on some of the chips her mother probably set up for them.

“You guys do realize your house is next door right?” she said as she walked towards the kitchen.

Quinn turned around and smiled widely when he saw her walking towards the three of them. Jack hopped off of the counter as he chuckled. Luke turned his gaze towards her and looked as if he saw a ghost. He stayed frozen as he watched her walk towards them.

“Your mom buys the best snacks,” Quinn said excitedly as he engulfed her in a tight hug. “How’ve you been?” he asked as he rested his hand onto her upper arm, surveying her features. Jack jogged towards her hugging her tightly, she laughed as she rocked back and forth with him.

“I’ve been doing good, how are you guys?” she said as Jack pulled away. She glanced towards Luke, who hasn’t taken his eyes off of her since she stepped inside the house.

“Off season started a bit early but otherwise we’re great, ready for some sun,” Quinn muttered as he pulled Y/N to his side again, Quinn looked towards Luke for a few seconds, “Lukey, are you going to say hi?” Quinn offered tilting his head to the side.

Luke shook his head slightly as he stood up from his leaning position and he took a deep breath as he began walking towards her and Quinn slowly.

“Well, actually I should go check on Kyle. Make sure he didn’t get lost,” she slipped from Quinn’s grasp as she started walking away from them.

“Kyle?” Luke let out. Y/N spun around to meet Luke’s gaze. She widened her eyes as she nodded.

“My boyfriend? Did my mom not tell you guys he was joining us for a few weeks out here?” she offered.

“Y/N?” Kyle called out from the back hallway. She forced a smile as she searched down the hall for him.

“Hey baby,” she said as she stepped into her bedroom, her voice echoing into the kitchen.

“Kyle?” Jack let out barely above a whisper, his face scrunched up in disgust. “Did you know she had a boyfriend?” Jack pointed his question to Luke. Luke crossed his arms over his chest as he shook his head. Jack stared towards him furrowing his eyebrows harshly, “Why are you acting weird?”

“I’m not,” he mumbled before he started shoving more chips in his mouth. Quinn and Jack shared a look before they decided to drop it.

Y/N and Kyle walked from the hallway together side by side. Hearing his heavy footsteps, Luke kept his gaze on the sour cream and onion chips in front of him as he continued to snack. Y/N nervously wrapped her arm around Kyle as she walked towards the kitchen.

“Kyle, these are the boys,” she muttered motioning towards them, “That’s Quinn, Jack, and that’s L-Luke,” she pointed out each of the guys individually. Quinn and Jack walked towards the pair, each of them forcing a smile.

“Nice to meet you,” Quinn offered his hand and Kyle gladly took it. Kyle offered his hand towards Jack and he reluctantly took the handshake.

Luke leaned upward from his leaning position as he slowly walked towards the small group. Y/N looked towards him, their eyes meeting for the first time in months. Her breath caught in her throat as she forced her gaze to meet Kyle.

Kyle offers his hand to Luke and Luke shakes his hand with a polite smile. “You go to UMich?” Luke asked as he rested his hands on his hips.

Kyle nodded, “Yeah, I’m on the wrestling team,” he smiled as he spoke.

“That’s sick,” Quinn offered as he crossed his arms over his chest.

The small group continued to talk to one another beside Luke. He kept watching Y/N, his longest friend, his best friend. The woman he loved, in a relationship with someone else. The last time they hung out crossed his mind, like it did a thousand times a day.

He freaked out. He freaked out when he woke up with her back pressed against his chest and their legs entangled together. His heart swelled with so much happiness as he looked at her sleeping beside him that morning, except every other part of his body resorted to panic.

His eyes meet Y/N’s gaze, scanning her features for any sign that she thinks about that night too. She clenched her jaw before she turned her gaze back to Quinn. Luke pulled his lips between his teeth as he dropped his gaze to the floor.

“I’m going to go unpack my stuff,” Luke let out as his gaze met each person in the small room. Quinn pulled his head back as he let out a breathy chuckle.

“You never unpack when we come here,” Quinn offered.

“Feel like using my dresser for once,” he said with a simple shrug before glancing towards Y/N one more time before he started walking out of the kitchen.

“We should probably unpack too,” Kyle said as he rested his hand on her hip as he held her possessively to his side. Y/N nodded as the pair walked back towards her room, she spun her gaze around towards the back door that Luke walked out of.

Quinn and Jack looked towards each other awkwardly as they both started walking out of the back door. “They’re acting weird, right?” Jack asked.

“Very,” Quinn shot back as they walked out of the house back towards their own.

After another twenty minutes Quinn and Jack both barged into Luke’s room to see him actually unpacking his clothes and putting them into his dresser and closet. He had soft country music playing as he was pacing around the room putting things in random spots.

“Are you okay?” Jack asked as he watched his younger brother. Luke only hummed as a reply as he added his hoodies to a coat hanger. “Are you sure? You and Y/N never shut up when you two are together.” Jack observed.

“We haven’t really talked these past few months,” he said as he walked towards his closet with the six hoodies he brought with him.

“You guys used to never go a day without at least calling each other,” Quinn mumbled.

Luke shrugged, “Things change,” he said keeping his gaze low and away from his brothers bombarding him with questions.

“What things?” Jack muttered. Luke shrugged his shoulders again.

Quinn furrowed his eyebrows harshly, “What, you guys hook up or something?” he asked teasingly, chuckling nervously.

Luke froze, his entire body stuck as he slowly met Quinn’s gaze for a few seconds before he shook his head. “No,” he let out barely above a whisper. He dropped his gaze again as his cheeks turned bright red.

Jack’s eyes widened as his mouth dropped open as he shoved Quinn to the side. “When?!” Jack asked as he jumped up excitedly.

“I said we didn’t,” Luke said as he nervously ran his hand across his chin.

Quinn smiled widely, “Yeah but you're a horrible liar, Lukey. What happened? Was it bad or something?”

It was the opposite. It was probably the best sex he’s ever had. It made him realize how much love he actually had for her as they didn’t just hook up. It felt like the start of something, a new chapter. A chapter where they were madly in love with one another.

“What? No,” he defended as he rolled his eyes.

“Then what happened?” Jack pressed.

Luke sighed as he shook his head, “I don’t know, I asked if we could talk about it later and we never did,” he took another deep breath.

“When did you guys-?” Quinn trailed off.

Luke threw his hands to the side, not wanting to talk about it any longer, “February, her sorority had some Valentine’s Day event we went to together. I walked her back to her dorm and we hooked up. Are you guys done asking questions?”

“No, dude, why didn’t you guys talk again?”

Luke clenched his jaw as he shook his head. His brothers were right, he was an awful liar. “I freaked out, okay?” he took a deep breath, “She’s my best friend and instead of telling her how I felt, I had sex with her while we were drunk. That’s a dickhead move. I just didn’t know what to say,”

“What’d you freak out about?” Jack asked.

“Everything was going to be different with her,” he let out while shaking his head, “I didn’t want to lose her, if I fucked things up and I fucked things up anyway. Can we please stop talking about it? I don’t want to be thinking about it while we all on the boat later,”

~~~

It was nine at night and the sun was already down but they were still hanging out on the boat. The music was loud to the point where you could only hear the person next to each other talk. Her parents were sitting and talking with Quinn and Jack as Ellen and Jim were talking with Luke. Y/N and Kyle were in their own world.

Except every time Luke spoke, Y/N felt her heart flutter. She missed him, she missed him so much that it was physically painful. Her chest would ache hard at the idea of not talking with him.

Y/N kept her gaze on Luke, discreetly. “You okay?” Kyle whispered into her ear, pulling her gaze towards him. She nodded as she leaned towards him, kissing him briefly.

Luke was tuning out whatever his mom and dad were talking about as he saw Y/N kissing Kyle. He felt as though his heart shattered. He clenched his jaw as he dropped his gaze towards his lap. Quinn glanced towards Y/N briefly before he looked towards his youngest brother. He clenched his jaw as he shook his head.

“You know,” her mother leaned towards Quinn, “I always thought Y/N and Luke would’ve ended up together.” Quinn's eyes widened as he looked towards her, “It just seems like they are growing apart. Breaks my heart,” she said as she tilted her head to the side.

“You don’t like Kyle?” Quinn asked, and she shrugged.

“He’s a sweet boy. He’s just not our Luke,”

“I think we all thought they were going to end up together,” Quinn whispered towards her and she nodded.

~~~

The next day, Y/N and Kyle stayed in bed for a few extra hours just basking in each other's company. “You know, I thought you and Luke were the closest? I mean being the same age at least,”

She was thrown off by the sudden subject change as her face scrunched up slightly. She cleared her throat as she nodded, “We were,” she started as she saw Kyle take in a sharp breath. “He was my best friend, but we had a falling out a few months ago,” she mumbled.

Memories of the night in question flashed in her mind. His lips against her own as they were breathing heavily and grinding against each other's bodies. She recalled feeling her body fill with butterflies as he kissed her in the most dream-like way.

“What happened?” he asked. She looked into his dark brown eyes as she tried to figure out if she should tell the truth. Kyle nodded slightly as he took in a deep breath, “Let me guess,” he mumbled, “You guys had sex?”

She clenched her jaw as she nodded slightly. “How’d you know?” she muttered as she met his gaze.

“I don’t know, it’s the way he looks at you; like he’s seen you naked or something,” he mumbled, a dry chuckle leaving his throat. She smiled softly as she rolled her eyes playfully.

“It just made things awkward between us, we haven’t spoken since it happened,” she let out. He remained silent as he processed, “Are you mad that I didn’t tell you?” she asked.

“No, I mean as long as it was just sex. Like you didn’t have feelings for him, right?” he asked.

“Yeah, no-no feelings,” she mumbled.

~~~

She sat on the bathroom counter, his legs between her own. She adjusted the red heart around his neck that had her name written in cursive across it. “I never thought you would join a sorority,” he let out as he rested one of his hands on her thigh. She smiled as a chuckle fell from her lips.

“It looks good on a resume,” she mumbled as she took a hold of a spray bottle and started spraying it onto his curls. His face scrunched up together as some of the mist hit his face.

“This is tacky,” he continued, holding up the heart around his neck. She smirked as she took a hold of some of her own hair product and ran her fingers through his hair. “Do we have to wear these the whole night?”

“Yes, Lukey,” she mumbled as she tilted her head to the side as she admired the work she did on his hair. “And until I get a boyfriend, you have to be my date to these things,” she said as she pushed him backwards slightly so she could hop off the bathroom counter.

She adjusted the short black dress on her frame as she looked towards the mirror. She straightened out the red heart with Luke’s name. “What are we even going to do there?” he asked as he ran his fingers through his own hair.

“Drink, dance, and take lots of photos,” she mumbled as she applied lip gloss to her lips. Luke eyed her lips as she added the clear gloss. “It’ll be fun,” she mumbled as she turned to meet his gaze.

He huffed as he smiled, “You and I have different definitions of fun,” he mumbled. She rolled her eyes playfully as she took a hold of her phone and pulled out her camera. “Oh awesome, fun’s starting now,” he said sarcastically.

“You can be unbearable sometimes, you know that?” she let out teasingly as she wrapped her arm around the center of his back as he draped his arm around her lowerback. He pulled her tightly towards him.

“Yeah, you too,” he shot back as he turned his head towards her with a teasing smile. She rolled her eyes as she snapped the photo of them at that moment.

“Smile,” she mumbled as she turned her gaze towards the mirror and snapped a few photos of them. Most of them are Luke glancing towards her the entire time.

~~~

Later that night, Y/N stepped foot inside her own lakehouse, getting another drink from the fridge inside when she saw Luke sitting on the barstool beside her kitchen island. He lifted his gaze as he tossed a few chips into his mouth. His eyes scanned her body. Taking note of every single curve of her frame and how the two piece swimsuit showed every perfect part of her body.

“Hi,” she let out as she smiled softly. He returned the soft smile as he sat up straight as she walked past the kitchen island.

“Hey,” he mumbled as he nervously ran his fingers through his hair. They remained silent as she took a Truly from the fridge and cracked it open. She spun around and met his gaze. “Kyle seems nice,” he mumbled. She smiled.

“Yeah, he is,” she muttered as she brought the can to her lips.

Their eyes remained connected as they remained silent for a few seconds. His eyes were soft and welcoming; he looked like he knew what she was thinking. All of things that have been left unsaid between them, it was as if their eyes were doing all the talking. Her heart went into overdrive.

Her eyes tried not to admire his body. His abs were prominent as well as the strong arm muscles. She took a deep breath as she rested her hands onto the counter.

“How’s the NHL?” she asked. His eyes widened as he smiled softly.

“It’s amazing,” he mumbled, his eyes squinting slightly.

“You were fun to watch,” she let out as she met his gaze. He tilted his head to the side, a toothy grin on his lips.

“You watched the games?” he asked, genuinely shocked. She nodded dramatically.

“You are still my best friend, Luke, Of course I was going to watch,” she mumbled as she met his gaze as she walked closer to him. He blinked his eyes rapidly as he looked away from her.

“You seem happy,” he mumbled, unable to maintain eye contact with her.

“Yeah, yeah.” she let out while shaking her head, “You too. I mean you’re living the dream, right?”

All he could do was hum as a reply as she was only a foot away from him and his chest was aching as he felt a magnet pulling her towards him but he tried to refuse the feeling and the desperation.

“Why are you all alone inside? We’ve got an amazing bonfire going,” she asked as she leaned against the countertop.

He couldn’t tell her the real answer. The real answer was that he had spent twenty-four hours watching Y/N and Kyle snuggle together and he was getting tired of it. He couldn’t breathe watching them because he wanted to kiss her cheek. He wanted to be the one holding her tightly. He wanted to be the one who loved her. He had to walk away and collect his thoughts.

While outside, Quinn was laughing at something Jack said when Kyle walked up to him. “Hey man, can I talk to you about something?” Kyle asked. Quinn’s smile slowly faded as he glanced towards Jack before he stood up and followed Kyle towards a secluded part of the backyard. Quinn nervously crossed his arms over his chest as he met Kyle’s gaze. “I’m gonna ask you a question and you’re going to not sugar coat anything,” Kyle asked. Quinn nodded.

“I’m not blind, alright? I know that your little brother has feelings for Y/N. She told me about what happened between them a few months back but she said that she didn’t have feelings for him. Is she telling the truth?” Kyle asked.

Quinn took a deep breath as he licked his lips nervously. “We’re all close with Y/N. Jack and I have always treated her like she’s our little sister. Luke-”

Quinn took in a sharp breath, “Luke’s been in love with her since he was eleven. He never wanted to act on it because he was terrified of losing her. Y/N was harder to see if she felt the same. Well, until they were like fifteen and they started cuddling all of the time. It was as if they constantly had to be near each other or the other one would implode. She dragged him to all of the school dances and sorority events.” he explained as Kyle was getting impatient.

“Look, they're avoiding each other because they are afraid of getting hurt. Which is causing them to get hurt anyway. You seem like a great guy, who would’ve been perfect for her. But there’s a lot of history between them that can’t be ignored,”

Kyle remained silent as he took a deep breath. If he was being honest, he knew she wasn’t all in. He wasn’t even all in on the relationship either, it didn’t hurt to hear as much as he thought it was going to be.

“I appreciate it, man.” Kyle mumbled as his gaze looked past Quinn to see Luke and Y/N walking out of the house together. Kyle let out a dry chuckle, “Can you tell her why I left? I’m going to pack my stuff and call an Uber.” Kyle mumbled.

“What? You sure?” Quinn asked.

“Like you said, they’ve got history. I’m not stepping between that,” he said as he looked towards Y/N and Luke again. “Make sure they end up together, alright?” he said before he walked towards the house discreetly.

Quinn stood still, his gaze on the dirt beneath his feet. “What the fuck just happened?” he asked himself as he walked back towards the bonfire.

After another hour, Kyle was long gone and Y/N still had no idea. “Alright, you guys we’re going to go to bed, see you guys in the morning,” Her father expressed to everyone, the parents all went to their own lakehouse leaving the boys and Y/N alone.

“Where’d Kyle go? Have you guys seen him?” she asked the three of them as she was starting to get a little worried.

Quinn’s eyes widened as he cleared his throat, “He left,” is all he said. Luke perked upward at the mention.

“What?” she let out.

“He-uh-he’s not as comfortable as he thought with you and Luke’s history. So he left,” Quinn said as his voice progressively got quieter. Luke kept shifting his gaze between Quinn and Y/N. She furrowed her eyebrows harshly as she leaned forward.

“Did he tell you this history exactly?” she questioned, glancing at Luke for a second.

“He might’ve,” he mumbled, glancing towards Luke, “Kinda already knew about it, though.”

Y/N eyes flashed red as she turned her gaze towards Luke. “Can I talk to you?” she asked, standing up and walking towards Hughes's lakehouse. Luke’s room was on the second floor and his parents room was on the first. In her lakehouse her room was directly next to her parents.

Luke slowly stood up from his seat, “Thanks,” he said sarcastically as he followed Y/N. Jack and Quinn shared a glance before they looked back towards the dying flame.

Once Luke stepped into the house, he saw her already storming up the stairs towards his room. He took a deep breath as he skipped several steps to follow her faster. She walked into his room and began to pace back and forth. Luke shut the door behind him.

“You told Quinn!?” she called out.

“An-and Jack, I’m sorry. I wasn’t trying to! You know I’m a bad liar,”

“What did you tell them exactly?!” she questioned.

He stayed quiet for a second as his heart was loud in his ear, “Quinn made a joke about us hooking up and I-I didn’t deny it that good so they found out. I told them that we just didn’t talk afterwards, we were just avoiding each other,” he explained.

Her mouth fell open as she nodded slowly. Her tongue pushed to the side of her mouth as she spun around to look away from him for a brief second.

“Do you remember what you told me the next morning?” she asked, her voice quieter.

He met her gaze and squinted his eyes slightly, “That I was running late to practice and if we could talk about it later?”

“Before that,”

He thought about it for a second, he replayed every second of that morning in his mind but the words were not coming to his mind. She took a deep breath as she clenched her fist and unclenched it. “You said that I was the last person you’d ever want to have a hookup with. Like-like it was embarrassing to have sex with me,”

His eyes widened as he felt like punching himself in the chest. “Oh my god-no that’s not-”

“You hurt me, Luke!” she shouted towards him, her eyes welling up in tears.

“I thought-I thought,” she shook her head again, “I don’t know what I thought but that was horrible to hear. Especially from you! You were supposed to be my best friend.” she shouted towards him.

“That’s not what I meant!” he said loudly, “That not what I meant,” he let out softer as he stepped towards her, almost reaching out to touch her.

“You know, I cared a lot about Kyle! We could’ve been something great. He was sweet and charming and he would’ve never said that to me but you-you ruined that!” she shouted as she stared deeply into his eyes. The tension was rising between them as they were only a foot apart.

“Well, if you care about the guy so much why aren’t you going after him?! Huh? Why are you standing here, shouting at me?!” he countered, getting closer to her face. She clenched her jaw as her heart was beating hard against her chest. Her skin felt hot as if steam was leaving her body.

“I don’t know!” she shouted back as her eyes looked deeply into his eyes. His eyes were staring hard back towards her.

“You didn’t deserve our first time together to be a drunken hook up,” he expressed, taking another step towards her. “You deserved roses and candles and all that sappy romantic shit not some dorm bed we barely fit on,” he continued as he scanned her softening features.

“Luke-”

“I couldn’t tell you I loved you, I couldn’t tell you because I was scared I was going to lose my best friend. And then I fucked up and lost you anyway,” he explained as they were mere inches apart now. “You deserved better than that and I couldn’t face it,” he mumbled.

She leaned towards him, urgently kissing him. She wrapped her arms around his neck as she felt her body jump against him.

He quickly took a hold of her lower back pulling her towards him. The tension between them only increased as their lips remained connected sloppily.

She jumped up and wrapped her legs around his waist. Her bare thighs against his body rushed goosebumps against her skin.

He delicately laid her down onto his bed as his lips pulled away from hers briefly, admiring her features from the very short distance.

“I love you too,” she mumbled as she ran her fingers through the ends of his curls. He pecked her lips briefly before he leaned fully away from her. “Where are you going?” she asked barely above a whisper.

“We’re not doing this now,” he muttered as shook his head. He stood up from the bed and walked towards his closet to give her some clothes to sleep in. Instead of the swimwear still covering her frame.

“Why not?” she asked, pouting slightly. He smiled widely as he tossed her one of his hoodies and a pair of shorts she left at his dorm several months back.

“Candles and roses,” he mumbled as he covered his frame in one of his hoodies. She smiled widely as she began to put on the clothes he handed her.

#luke hughes #luke hughes series #luke hughes fanfic #luke hughes x reader #luke hughes imagines #nhl #nhl imagines #nhl x reader #nhl fic #hockey #jack hughes x reader #jack hughes imagines #quinn hughes x reader #quinn hughes imagines #quinn hughes #new jersey devils x reader #new jersey devils fic #new jersey devils #nj devils

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joels-shitty-puns · 5 months

Note

I'm gonna make a request again (sorry your last one was too good for me not to ask again) but this time for a jealous Joel! Maybe the reader and him have been friends for a while and she's oblivious to his flirting and she finally lands a date? How it goes from there can be up to you! I just love the jealous and possessive trope.

The Jealousy Bug

Pairing: Jealous!Joel Miller x f!Reader

Hi!! I'm so sorry this took me so long to write, but thank you for the request!! I hope you like it!! I got a lil carried away... hope its not too much smut.

~~~~~

(Reader and Joel live in Jackson, amid the apocalypse)

Word count: 6.8K (oof)

Warnings: 18+ only, MDNI!! Smut smut smut. P in V sex (likely unprotected but not specified. Its an apocalypse, yo.), masturbation (m and f), sort of dubcon? voyeurism?? sorta?, kissing, talk of genitals and arousal, horny behavior. Explicit language and mean names. Alcohol. Violence: infected, guns, punching, mention of a knife. Joel is kind of a jerk sometimes. Possessive. Mentions of loss and grief (all within S.1 of TLOU). I haven't played part II yet so we're just gonna ignore what we know happens there. Joel and Ellie are happy in Jackson. Joel and Reader are friends and sort of neighbors. Clueless idiots in love. A total asshole of a guy in the town. Lil bit of fluff/romance? Mention of bugs (pill bugs), but not in a gross way. If I missed anything, please let me know, and I apologize!

Other Stuff: Avoidance of reader descriptors, other than reader is AFAB. Mentions of having hair on the noggin. She/her pronouns. Reader is clueless and also clumsy as hell. Reader also drinks coffee and alcohol. Italics indicate thoughts.

__________

It was around 4PM when you filed into the community center for another mandatory patrol meeting. It may be an apocalypse, but even now, you wished this meeting could have been an email instead. Alas, that was a thing of the past, and you were unfortunately stuck listening to the usual spiel about necessary vs. unnecessary items to raid… The importance of remembering to ABC, “Always Be Cautious,” plants that can and can't be eaten, etc.

You sat in your usual spot, the back row next to Joel Miller. A year ago when you first moved to this town, first started patrol, you came into this very room not knowing anyone. Friend groups stuck together, each of the two front rows filled, yet a few empty spaces here and there. Instead, you walked towards the back of the room. A handsome man, who you soon learned was named Joel, sat by himself, three rows back, behind the last full aisle. He was alone. The whole aisle of chairs was empty. He sat with his arms crossed, and you could tell based on his posing that he was not the social type.

You were feeling a bit nervous, having finally found a sort of civilization in this mess, and hoping the people of Jackson accept you and not just shoot you, like most camps do when they see unknown faces. Unsure where to sit, you continued to head towards the back, slightly drawn to the gorgeous gray-haired man in the last row. Not wanting to intrude, you sat at the far end from Joel. You could feel his eyes on you as you sat, but you didn't dare look over and make eye contact. Years of survival instincts have told you that, especially when someone doesn't want to be bothered.

_____

When you first walked into the room, Joel looked up. He sat in the back row, as usual, not wanting to get close to anyone. However, even if he did, nobody gave him the time of day. They have heard stories of what he’s done, they have seen him around town, often grumbling about something. They could tell he wanted to be left alone and they had no interest in testing how badly he wanted to be left alone.

Joel found it easier to not form connections. Tommy kept telling him to make friends, come around more, socialize in the town. But Joel had learned over the years why making connections never ends well. All he has is Tommy and Ellie, and neither of those were his initial decision, but Tommy is his only family, and somehow he let himself care for Ellie.

But when Joel saw you… there was a flash of longing. He saw you smile gently at Tommy with a small wave. He could see you shrink walking to your seat past the cliques. You were beautiful, and if it were pre-pandemic, you'd be the exact type he'd probably take interest to.

But those days are over.

Or… so he thought.

He set his eyes back down on his hands in his lap, avoiding eye contact with you when you sat down at the end of the row from him.

Why did she sit so far away? Am I that horrible to be around? His heart questioned.

You don't want to be near people anyway. Good she sat far away. Leave me alone. His brain tried to argue.

Tommy droned on and on, the meeting nearing an hour by now, and you could feel Joel’s eyes on the side of your face every few minutes. You don't know why he kept staring, but it made you feel nervous. Did you have something on your face or clothes? Did you smell bad?

Tommy knew his brother well, sometimes more than Joel likes to admit out loud, and as he talked, he took note of Joel’s staring. At first his expression looked confused, maybe irritated or disgusted. Then it looked slightly… disappointed. But he kept stealing glances your direction, and so with a smirk, Tommy assigned the two of you to be on patrol together. Joel questioned his reasoning afterward, but he knew there was no point arguing with his brother.

After that day, you patrolled together. You both went to the bar with the group after meetings. You sat closer and closer to Joel. You managed to get some words out of him, and he listened to you chatter on. But it was when you brought him a cup of coffee before patrol one morning that he finally let down his guard. His heart had betrayed his defenses.

“What's this?” He asked, gruffly.

“Coffee, Joel…” you replied with a joking eye roll. “It's black. I know you don't like anything in it.”

He took a sip, shocked to taste that you actually knew how he took his coffee. “How did you know that?”

“I notice things Joel.” You patted his shoulder, walking towards the group.

_____

Now, a year later, the two of you were very close friends. You still surprised him with things you remembered or noticed, but much to his chagrin, the one thing you didn't pick up on were his advances. He'd call you pet names, be sweet to you, treat you like a gentleman, flirt a little, and it was like talking to a robot. You were clueless.

Tonight's meeting finally ended, the large group heading outside to the chill fall air. “You wanna get drinks with the patrol squad?” you asked Joel.

“Wouldn't miss it,” he winked at you, putting his leather jacket on his shoulders.

Although you went as a group, ultimately you and Joel spent most of the nights in your own little bubble, occasionally making space in your circle for Tommy, or Maria if she joined.

Tonight, the two of you sat at the bar, the patrol group spread throughout the room at different tables. Joel excused himself to use the restroom, and while he was gone, Jimmy, one of the other patrol members approached you. Hurrying before Joel returned, he flirted and asked you out on a date. You told him you'd think about it, that you weren't sure if you were ready for a relationship after years of caution.

Not technically a lie, you thought. Although you really just weren't ready for a relationship because your heart was already taken by your handsome best friend.

Joel returned just in time to see Jimmy walking away. “What did he want?” Joel grumbled. “Ah nothin, just wanted to say hi while getting a drink,” you lied. Joel accepted this answer and the two of you drank into the night. At the end of the evening, you seemed pretty drunk. Jimmy offered to walk you home, but before you had a chance to reply, Joel replied for you.

“I'll take her home, thanks.” He bit, turning you away from Jimmy. “I don't like the idea of that boy walkin’ you home. Don't trust ‘im. ‘Specially not when you're in this condition,” he wrapped an arm around you, shuffling you toward the door.

“You don't think I can handle myself, Joel?” You asked him, pulling away, a little bit irritated at him treating you like a weakling. “I seem to do just fine on patrol,” you argued.

“I know that, sugar. I didn't mean it like that. I just don't trust that guy. Heard how he goes through women. Don't want him trying’ anything with you,” he brushed his hand over your hair, causing you to soften at his words and actions.

You gasped lightly. “Is THE Joel Miller… jealous?” You knew he wasn't, but why not test the waters?

“What? Jealous? Of what? No ‘m not.” he balked. “Just lookin’ out for you…”

“Mmhm… you just wanna be the only big strong man walking me home, huh?” You teased, tripping over your own feet.

Joel caught you in his arms. “Big strong man, huh? ‘S that what you think of me?”

Shit… did I say that? You panicked. Maybe I'm more drunk than I thought…

Deciding to tease it off, you replied, “well you do always seem to catch me when I fall…” with a wink.

Falling in more ways than one… you thought, frustrated.

He rubbed his neck with the hand not holding you upright. You could almost see a pink tinge to his cheeks.

No, that has to be the lights playing tricks on my eyes… you thought. No way Joel Miller was blushing at your words.

“I kinda have to, ya big klutz. Practically a liability. I oughta tell Tommy to add a safety section on patrolling with you,” he bantered.

“Ah, shut up” you laughed with a push, causing yourself to lose balance instead of Joel. He just gave a knowing look, causing you both to laugh as you continued walking, now side by side instead of him holding you up.

After a few moments of silence, you spoke up. “You know, I could've walked myself home, Joel,” you stumbled, giggling.

“Whoa there, sweetheart.” He wrapped his arms around you again, propping you up. “Don't worry about it. Let's just get you home. You've had way too much to drink.”

“You're so sweet Joel,” you pouted at him, booping his nose. “Joelly Joel.” You giggled. “Jolly Joelly.” Another giggle. “I dunno why people think you're so grumpy. I think you're just a big teddy bear,” you closed your eyes, leaning your head on his shoulder while he stumbled forward, trying to keep you upright.

“Who says I'm grumpy, darlin’?” He tilted his head towards you, smirking. “The whole town, silly. Silly Joelly. Joely-poly.” You gasped abruptly, causing Joel to jerk and turn to face you. “What? What is it?” His hand reached for his knife on his hip. Old habits die hard.

“Joely-poly!!” You squealed. “Awe! Roly-polies. Remember those!? I used to love them when I was little.” You pouted. “Before this whole world went to shit.”

Joel thought back to the little pill bugs, playing in the dirt with them when he was younger. Teaching his own daughter about them. His heart aches for what he lost, but he also thinks of Ellie. He bets she would love the little bugs too.

“That's a cute nickname for you,” you smiled. “They're so cute. Just,” you booped his nose. “Like.” Boop. “You,” you wrapped your arms around his neck, hugging him tight. Another gasp from your lips.

He flinched again. “Darlin’, if you don't quit that I swear-”

“Joeeeel!” You pouted. “Do you think the roly-polies all died off with the infection!?” Your eyes welled up.

“Oh, sweetheart, don't cry. There's probably still some out there. Bugs could get cordyceps long before the fungus attacked humans, and they were still alive back then.” You looked up into his deep brown eyes through your fluttering lashes. “You really think so?” You leaned in, placing both your hands on his cheeks. His breath caught in his chest. “Darlin’, you drank a lot tonight-” you cut off his sentence, running your hands down his neck, resting your palms on his chest. His heart was beating a mile a minute. If he didn't know better, he'd worry his heart would leap out and fly away.

Your eyes lit up and you slid off his chest, lowering clumsily to the ground and gripping his sides for balance. You were now on your knees, eye level with his crotch, hands on his hips. His breath was ragged and his stomach full of twirling butterflies. “Wh-what do you think you're doin’?” He asked nervously. You looked up at him with big eyes, your hands slowly falling down from his hips to his thighs as you tried to balance yourself in your drunken state. He couldn't help but feel his pants begin to tent at the position you were in. He would never take advantage of you in your current state, but trying to ignore the desire brewing in his body after so many months of unrequited feelings was challenging. Did you finally see his advances for what they were? Feelings instead of friendliness?

You grinned up at him, finally regaining balance. “I'm gonna go look for ‘em!” you turned and waddled away on your knees, heading a couple feet away, towards a patch of flowers off the path.

She just needed to use me as a ladder, or what…? Joel thought to himself with a sigh and shaking his head in disappointment, his sexual frustration at its breaking point.

You crawled forward, falling onto your hands and knees in the soft dirt. Joel quickly stepped forward to try and grab you but realized, despite your lack of grace, you meant to do that. “Ugh… darlin', it's dark out here. It's cold. You're drunk. Let's get you home.”

“I'm looking for buggies, Joel!!” You leaned towards a leaf, arching downward so that your face was closer to the ground, ass up.

“Oh, have mercy…” Joel groaned under his breath, his eyes drifting downward. Your ass was up in the air, facing him, the fabric of your dress having fallen forward towards your front. Your light pink panties were on full display for Joel, leaving little to his imagination in this position. Joel subtly adjusted his pants, looking up to the sky and shaking his head in a silent plea.

You whined. “Joel, I don't see any.” You leaned farther forward, wiggling your butt somehow higher. Joel looked around, panicked at the thought that someone else might see you in this position. But luckily, you were close to your house and it was just the two of you out here. He turned back to you again. “I think it's time you get up and we go in-” you moved further forward, the streetlight shining above you and illuminating your ass. Joel tried to be a gentleman, but his eyes betrayed him. As he snuck another glance, he couldn't help but notice a little wet spot over the crotch of your panties. “In-inside…” he finished his sentence, words catching in his throat. He gulped, trying to divert his eyes.

Taking a shaky breath and stepping forward, trying to ignore the throbbing need in his pants, he lightly grabbed your arm. “It's time to go sweetheart. The bugs are sleepin’ I think.”

You looked at him and smiled mischievously. “I know, Joel,” you winked. Jumping up, you scampered towards your house, leaving Joel to wonder what the hell just happened.

“Woman's gonna be the death of me,” Joel muttered under his breath to himself. He caught up to you, just as you both approached your house. “Joel, I don't wanna go home. Can't I stay with you? And Ellie?” you batted your eyelashes at him. He rubbed his neck. “Ellie's with a friend tonight. But, you do have a point. You probably shouldn't be left by yourself in this state. Don't want you gettin’ hurt, or sick, and bein’ all alone.”

“Such a gentleman, Joel.” You touched his bicep, the two of you walking towards Joel's house across the street.

Hardly, he thought, grimacing at the reason he was aching in his trousers, feeling like an old creep, and a terrible excuse for a friend.

Once inside Joel's house, he gave you a baggy sleep shirt and a glass of water with some crackers to help with the alcohol. You changed, brushed your teeth with a spare toothbrush, and used the restroom. He let you have his bed, while he took the couch down the hall, scrunching his legs up to barely fit.

_____

Joel tried his hardest to ignore what he saw earlier and just go to bed, but the aching only continued, making it impossible to sleep. Sure that you must have fallen asleep by now, tucked away in his bed down the hall, he quietly reached into his pajama bottoms and boxers, pulling out his rock-hard penis. Even the mere touch of removing himself from his pants caused him to hiss, so worked up he could have cum just watching you bent over earlier.

He was a gentleman, but he was still a man, and one that hadn't been with a woman in a very long time. With as many people as he'd lost by one means or another, he'd told himself he wouldn't get close to anyone else. Sarah's mom. Sarah. Tess. Bill and Frank. Sam and Henry. He almost thought he had lost Tommy before Jackson, too. It was against his wishes that Ellie crawled her way into his heart, and then he almost lost her as well. He was beginning to think maybe it was him. He was cursed, doomed to have anyone he loved ripped away from him.

Which is why when you came to Jackson, he tried his best to ignore you. But you always greeted him, cheerful and sweet, like a little ball of sunshine that was somehow untarnished by the storm clouds of an apocalypse.

He was irritated to realize that he had made room in his heart for you. You caused an ache in his heart that yearned to be filled. A missing piece in his soul. A place for him to someday fit, tangled between sheets and loving words. It had been about a year since you moved to Jackson, and he still feared getting too close to you, yet he would try his hardest to woo you the way a gentleman should. Sweet nicknames, flirting, gentle touches. You never picked up on it. Whether or not you felt the same, he stupidly fell in love. Unsure if it was mutual, yet pretty sure it wasn't after all this time, he tried to ignore the dirty thoughts revolving around you when the late-night urges would hit him. Somehow it felt wrong.

But tonight, it was hard to avoid. Having you touch him. His face, his neck, his chest, his hips, his thighs. Kneeling eye level with his crotch. Slinking away, sticking your barely covered ass in the air, letting your wet panties be shown to him and only him. He couldn't get you out of his head as he stroked himself. First slowly, but then harder and faster, trying to reach his climax with the thought of him burying himself in that sweet spot underneath your wet underwear. How he longed to see you with his own eyes, begging for him.

He tried to be quiet, to keep himself hidden from you down the hall, but the noise of skin on skin grew slightly louder with each of his quiet moans and panting breaths that managed to slip from his lips. Imagining himself buried deep inside you, taking you from behind in the same position he saw you in earlier, imagining the tight grip around him and the slick noises he could only fantasize about. He could practically hear you moaning and sighing, the sound seeping from his subconscious to the living room. He pumped harder, swirling his thumb around the head, drooling with precum, as his climax grew closer. He could feel his strokes becoming less controlled and his balls pulling upward as he began to shoot load after load of white hot release up under his shirt onto his stomach. Stroking himself through it, he milked his last few ropes of cum out before laying back to catch his breath, slowly tucking himself back away in his pants.

Coming back to his senses, he realized the sounds of your moans and whimpers that he was imagining were still happening. Taken out of his fantasies when he finished, there was no reason for the sounds to still be in his head. Needing to grab a cloth from the linen closet down the hall anyway, he walked, nearing his bedroom door, and heard the unmistakable sound of you pleasuring yourself. Quietly, he padded down the hallway, closer to the door. He could tell you were trying to be quiet, but could still hear you, soft whimpers and pants, surrounded by wet schlick noises.

Fuck, he thought. He could feel himself already getting excited again, despite having just released a few minutes ago. He desperately wanted to join you in his bed, or at the least, stand by the door and listen to your sounds while pleasuring himself, but he wasn't going to be a creep, nor scare you to death. You were still his friend. Even if he did want to move the couch across the living room to hear you better.

_____

Meanwhile in Joel's room, you had tried to sleep. You really had. But tossing and turning, each roll causing your nose to be surrounded with his scent, you were thrown into a frenzy, like an animal in heat. Each smell of his cologne, shaving cream, deodorant, and natural body scent that you picked up from his bed sent a wave of arousal directly to your core. You wondered how many times he'd pleasured himself in this bed and how frequently. You wondered if he ever thought of you while doing it, imagining himself buried deep to the hilt inside of you, each drag of his cock more perfect than the last, much like you were imagining now.

You would be lying if you didn't say there were a lot of handsome men in Jackson. Granted, you had been without romance for a very long time, but still. Many of them were single, and some of them were very sweet and friendly. Yet for some strange reason, your heart had been drawn to Joel. The first moment you saw him, with his silvery curls and his grumpy face, his shining brown eyes and his patched beard, you were smitten. You were a bit disappointed that he seemed to be a massive grump, but despite what everyone said, he was always nice to you. Granted, you were always nice to him, so why should he be anything less, right?

He was always a total gentleman, calling you names like darlin’ and sweetheart, his southern drawl pulling you in like a lasso. His care for his unofficially-adopted daughter warmed your heart, and you could see he was a real family man from both their relationship, and the one he shared with his brother. It warmed your heart, especially when you befriended Tommy and Ellie, getting to hear them talk about Joel. Seeing the love they feel, even if they give him a hard time sometimes. You didn't see how people felt Joel was cruel or heartless, even with the stories you heard. Times were rough, and people did what they had to for survival.

You were always too chicken to make a move, and you figured he wouldn't be interested anyway. Surely him calling you those names and being sweet with you was just his Southern gentlemanly nature, right? You were nice to him, he was nice to you.

So tonight, when Jimmy, the local heartthrob in town, asked you on a date, you told him you'd think about it and let him know. Yeah, you claimed you weren't sure how you felt about relationships after all the world had become. Truth was, you wanted a last chance with Joel before throwing in the towel and settling for Jimmy.

Sure, Jimmy was handsome. Blonde hair, blue eyes, rugged, yet boyish. Several of the women in town had crushes on him, and he had had several of the women in town. You weren't clueless to the rumors about his playboy behavior. But it had been a while and well, you weren't getting any younger. It might be nice to have a partner, even if he did only want a short little fling.

So throwing back a few drinks, you decided you needed the liquid courage to finally make a move at Joel. One last effort to get his attention. You still didn't want to say anything to him, lest it ruin your current friendship that had grown so strong, but you could certainly use your body to entice a little. Drinking just enough to be brave, yet not so drunk that you were completely out of it, you gave an impression you were much drunker than you were, and needed Joel to help you out. Jimmy had almost been the one to walk you home, to your disappointment, before Joel stepped in, seeming slightly irritated about Jimmy's offer.

Yet after practically waving your ass in his face, showing him your panties (which you were sure looked wet), being inches from his crotch at knee height, and hanging on him all the way home, to now sleeping in his house and his bed, you were quite sure he didn't feel the same. Obviously his gestures were pure gentlemanly charm if he didn't bite after tonight's show.

So you tried to sleep, still a little drunk, but getting drunker off his scent. You tried to ignore the ache between your legs but the thought of him in this bed, groaning as his hand pumped his member to completion, made you throb. Soaked and antsy, you finally gave in and stuck your hand under the waistband of your panties. You let your imagination run wild, picturing him taking you in this bed, bringing you to bliss more than once. You could practically hear him groaning and panting, the sound seeping from your subconscious to the bedroom.

Tomorrow you would likely tell Jimmy yes. But tonight, you would try your best to get Joel out of your system, one stroke of your fingers at a time. But as you finished, coming with a whisper of Joel's name under your breath, you could still hear the groans and pants from Joel. Climbing out of bed, you moved to the door, pressing your ear against it. You could just barely hear the sounds of him panting and groaning, intermittent with the fapping of skin on skin. Delightedly surprised, you listened harder, feeling your pussy drool at the thought. How desperately you wanted to go out into the living room and climb on top of him. But he might not want that… he probably just couldn't sleep. Probably nothing to do with the scene you put on earlier. So instead, you slinked back to his bed, opting for round two.

At some point, the two of you fell asleep, panting and writhing with the self-induced pleasure, and the sound of each other through the door.

_____

The next morning, you awoke, walking down the hall to see Joel in his pajama bottoms and no shirt, making coffee. Your eyes scanned his broad shoulders and back, naked and tan. Bringing you back to last night's events, you felt your breath catching in your chest.

“M-morning” you stuttered out, nervously.

Joel jumped, having not heard you. He turned, greeting you with a good morning. A faint blush crept across his cheeks and he quickly turned his head to pour a cup of coffee, offering you some as well. Thanking him, the two of you sipped in silence, both stealing glances at the other and thinking of the night before. Both of you felt like you had a dirty little secret the other didn't know.

“Thanks again for taking care of me last night,” you added. In more ways than one, you thought.

“Of course, darlin’. Couldn't have you walkin’ home all alone or getting sick in the middle of the night. You're always welcome here,” he smiled.

“Well, I guess I better head to my house now,” you sighed. “See you later at patrol?”

“Course. Take care, sugar.” He brushed his hand over your arm. That's new… you thought. But still, probably friendly, unfortunately.

____

Hours later, you show up to patrol, noticing Joel hasn't arrived yet. Still a few minutes early, you look at the map, thinking over the route. You felt a tap on your shoulder, and turned around to see Jimmy.

“Hey, Jimmy,” you greeted, feeling slightly awkward. You assumed he probably wanted (and deserved) an answer. You rubbed your arm nervously, staring at the ground, wondering what to tell him. He was handsome, you thought, and you weren't getting anywhere with Joel.

“Did you, uh” Jimmy scratched behind his ear, “give any more thought to that date?”

Geesh. Not a lot of thinking time here…

“I did,” you replied. “I think… My answer is yes. I'll go out with you.” You felt a pang of regret in your stomach, but you wanted a connection, and you just weren't getting that from Joel, despite what you wanted to think from last night.

Jimmy grinned. “Really?” He picked up your hand, holding it in his. “That's great. I know you have patrol today, but maybe Friday? I'll meet you at your house at 6?”

“Sure,” you gave a small fake smile. “Sounds great.” He still held your hand, warm and soft and nothing like the rugged, large, callused hands of hard-working Joel. Although Joel has never held your hand, the times he's touched your arms, or held you up on your walk from the bar, he left a trail of goosebumps and butterflies in his wake, despite being warm to the touch.

Jimmy went to kiss your hand, just as Joel walked up. “What’s goin’ on here, huh?” He asked, seeming almost… angry, looking from Jimmy, to your connected hands, over to your face. “Joel,” Jimmy dropped your hand, giving Joel a curt nod.

“Jimmy..” Joel replied, teeth clenched.

“I'll see you Friday,” Jimmy smiled at you, touching your shoulder before walking away.

“What did that little asshole want?” Joel growled.

“Geez Joel, chill out. What's your problem? I'm not allowed to talk to people?” You crossed your arms.

“I toldja last night. I don't trust that kid. Too busy sleepin’ around with the whole town. What's he talkin’ to you for?” Joel furrowed his brow, looking over at Jimmy across the room, now talking to some of the other patrolmen.

“Gosh Joel.. seriously what is wrong with you? First of all, he's hardly a kid. He's at least in his thirties. Second of all, everyone he's been with, I'm sure has been consensual, otherwise Tommy would have kicked him out of the town. And lastly, but probably more important. What do you mean “what is he talking to you for?” You mocked in a deep voice. “Like I'm the only option he has left? Like I'm not deserving of a man talking to me? Not that it’s any of your business, friend, but for your information, Jimmy is taking me on a date on Friday. So fuck off, Joel.” You started to stomp away angrily, grabbing your pack off the desk.

“The fuck he is,” Joel muttered under his breath, so quiet you didn't hear and grabbing his pack as well.

_____

Five hours. Five hours of riding in complete silence, checking out abandoned buildings in complete silence, and taking breaks in complete silence. Even your first patrol wasn't this quiet, and you couldn't help but feel like he was somehow angry at you.

As irritated as you were with him, not talking to him somehow felt worse. This wasn't like him. Is this the grumpy side everyone talks about? Is this Joel, the asshole you have yet to meet?

Feeling confused, your eyes started to cloud, slightly teary with anger and sadness, yet also a bit of dread at going out with Jimmy. You blinked your eyes, sorting through the abandoned drug store you and Joel were in.

Finding some condoms on a shelf, you threw them in your pack. “What're you doin’?” Joel asked. “Those can't be sold, didn't you pay attention to Tommy? They're rarely effective this old.”

“Yes I paid attention, Joel. I know they can't be sold. They're for me. I figured it's better than nothing,” you replied bitterly. “I have a date in a couple days, I want to be prepared,” you scowled. Joel’s jaw clenched, but he didn't say anything, instead turning to look the other direction of the aisle.

Crouched down to search the bottom shelf for other items, Joel was still turned away from you, keeping lookout on the other end of the aisle.

You didn't even hear the stalker leap around the corner from the shadows and pounce on you. It opened its mouth, fungal strands spreading from its mouth towards your face. Pure fear pulsed through your veins.

“Joel!!!!!” You cried out, using all your strength to try and push the infected off of your body, but it was too strong.

You screamed and kicked, struggling to break free, when Joel fired his shotgun, shooting the enemy in the head and immediately running over to you. Throwing the infected off of your body as if it was weightless, Joel scooped you into his arms. His lips moved but you heard nothing. Your ears rang, high pitched squeals from adrenaline, fear, shock, and the bang of the shotgun.

Joel pawed over your body, roughly inspecting you for bites and wounds in a frenzy. When he didn't find any, he held you in his arms again. “It's okay baby, it's okay. You're alright sweetheart. Come back to me, it's okay. You're okay.” Your hearing must have returned. He rocked you, tears welling from your eyes and his. “You're okay. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.” He kissed your ear and the side of your head, still rocking you in a hug, sitting on the floor, inches from the now-dead infected. The two of you needed to get out of here, but neither of you could move yet.

Finally you spoke. “Why are you sorry Joel?” You asked with a sniffle. You wrapped your arm around his back, the other hand finding the back of his head, gripping his curls gently.

“I'm sorry for how I've been actin’ all day. I'm sorry I didn't see that stalker before he attacked. I'm sorry for being so possessive earlier. I'm sorry,” he held you tighter.

You pulled back to look into his eyes. “Joel, you couldn't have heard or seen that stalker. That's what they do best. You saved me and that's all that matters. As for earlier, you were being an asshole, and it did really hurt my feelings. All this time people have said you're such a jerk, and I didn't see it,” you pulled away from his grip, “but today I did.” You looked at your lap. “Don't I deserve to go on a date? Don't I deserve to have someone love me?” You picked at the hem of your pants, avoiding his eye contact.

“Oh, darlin', I'm so sorry. I never meant for you to feel that way. I just - you deserve something real, not a hookup like that guy wants. I know his type. He'll sleep with you and toss you aside. You deserve to be treated like a lady.”

You snorted. “Yeah, Joel. That's how things are nowadays, too. Gentleman just waiting to sweep me off my feet. Shit, you literally just saved me from near-death, something that happens all the time today, and yet you're saying I deserve love? To find romance? Yeah, right.”

Joel didn't say anything. He just looked into your eyes, lips pursed and moving to the side in thought. His eyes drifted to your lips and back up to your sight.

You continued. “I don't even like Jimmy,” you said quietly. “I like someone else, but I just got tired of waiting and wanted some kind of connection. Even if it's just a night in bed.” At the last part of your sentence, Joel grimaced, almost in pain. And then he thought.

“Wait,” he sat back a little, scanning your face. “Who do you like?”

You gulped. Why not a little more adrenaline? “Well, it was you, until you started acting like an asshole. But I realized you probably didn't feel the same way a while ago. Especially after I practically threw myself at you last night.”

“Threw yourself at me last night? What are you talkin’ about? You were drunk,” Joel answered.

“I wasn't that drunk, Joel. My movements were pretty planned. The placement of my touches on your body. My ass angled up in your direction. I wanted you,” you added, pointedly.

Joel looked like he was solving a complicated math problem. “So you… last night when you… I heard you, in bed, pleasurin’ yourself. Were you… thinking about me?”

You looked up at him in shock and panic. “You heard me?” You asked in a frantic whisper.

“Yeah, I uh… I did. I got up to get a towel and heard your uh… sounds” he cleared his throat.

“I guess I should tell you then that I heard you too,” you said with a smirk.

Joel swallowed, hard. “Y-ya heard me?”

“Yep” you replied, popping your lips on the p sound.

Joel had nothing to lose at this point. “I was thinking about you,” he proclaimed. “Thinkin’ bout that wet spot on your panties when you flashed your ass in the air. Wishin’ I was buried inside you.” He ran his hand across your thigh.

Your breathing picked up. “I was thinking about you too. Wishing you'd bust through that door and take me in your bed, running my nails down your back as we came together…” you mimicked the motion with your fingers down his jacket-clad back.

“Fuck,” he hissed, eyes closing. You glanced down at the noticeable bulge in his jeans. “I like you too, I just never thought you felt the same. Y’never seemed to pick up on any of my sweet talkin’ or my names for ya.”

“I just figured you were being nice,” you replied, glancing back into his eyes.

“You should know by now, I'm only nice to you,” he growled. “I'm sorry I ruined that today,” he glanced at your mouth, licking his lips. “Was just jealous. Want you all for myself,” he stroked your thigh again.

You sighed at the feeling, pulling him by his collar to kiss him deeply. The kiss was frantic and rough, both of you trying to get as much of each other as possible, a year of build-up boiling at the surface. Teeth clashed and tongues danced and you pulled each other closer, grasping at clothes and skin.

The two of you broke the kiss, needing a gasp of air. You started to take off your shirt when Joel stopped you. “Whoa, darlin'. I want you just as bad, but not here,” he gestured to the old building. “It's dangerous, not to mention gross in here. I wasn't kidding when I said you deserve romance,” he stood, pulling you to your feet. “We're about a 20 minute ride from base, let's head home. Make your fantasy of fuckin’ in my bed come true,” he winked, giving a smack to your ass.

_____

The 20 minute ride felt never-ending as you both stole glances at each other, your panties still wet with arousal, and him still sporting the tent in his pants, which was hard to miss.

Finally making it back to the stables, you both quickly undressed the horses and put gear away, about to head out of the barn when Jimmy and his partner rode up. “Hey, babe,” he called to you. It sounded wrong from his mouth. Joel tensed at your side.

Dismounting his horse, Jimmy strolled over to you. “Hey Jimmy, I was thinking. I don't think I want to go on that date after all. I'm sorry, I just don't feel the same way.”

“What?” Jimmy asked in disbelief.

“I know, I'm sorry if I hurt you. I- I like someone else. I just didn't think they felt the same way,” you replied sheepishly.

“Fuck you,” he spat.

“What?” You were in disbelief.

“Fuck you, bitch. One of the few women in this town who won't fuckin’ put out. I was even gonna take you on some shitty date before I got you into bed, and now you make a fool of me? Nah, I don't think so,” he stalked towards you angrily.

You stepped back, worried what he might do, but Joel stepped in first, nailing a punch at Jimmy's nose. “Don't you dare talk to her like that,” Joel yelled.

Tommy came running in, hearing the commotion. After hearing what happened, it was decided that Jimmy wouldn't be welcome in this town any longer.

Satisfied, you grabbed Joel's hand. “Why don't I show you who I really belong to?” You looked up at him, biting your lip.

“Lead the way, baby.” He pushed you forward, smacking your ass.

The two of you stumbled into his house, kissing with little regard for objects. Luckily, Ellie was still at a friend's house. The door slammed closed and you kissed furiously, undressing as you walked. Finally you reached his bedroom and fell onto the bed, where he made all your fantasies of the night prior come true. The two of you enjoyed the taste of each other's mouths, kissing and licking, while he pounded into you, leaving you breathless and screaming his name as you both came.

“That was even better than I imagined,” you sighed, rolling over onto his chest.

“That's my girl,” he cooed, kissing your head and rubbing your back.

“Mine,” he whispered.

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pomegranateandblood · 3 months

Text

The Jacket (part 1/2)

Summary: Alive!reader gets assigned a new locker, finds Wally‘s letterman jacket and decides to keep it

Includes: Wally Clark x reader, smut

A/N: I just love Wally & Rhonda‘s friendship

"This is not what I meant when I asked for a new locker." You said, scrunching your nose in disgust.

„Yeah, it's like they haven't cleaned it in decades" Your friend dusted her hands off.

A comical cloud of dust came out of the locker, when you finally managed to open the jammed metal door. Coughing, you stepped back.

Meanwhile, unbeknown to you, two students were watching. Dead Students to be exact.

„Hey, isn't that your locker, hot stuff?" Rhonda pointed her lollipop towards the situation.

The footballer turned and nearly tripped, running over to you.

„Stop panicking, it's not like you could do anything about it anyway." The brunette rolled her eyes and started following him.

„They promised my my mum they wouldn't give my locker away and now I see some-„ Wally tried to find the right words, holding onto Rhondas arm.

She raised a brow at him „Hot cheerleaders taking over your locker ?"

„I'm serious! All the stuff I have on me is in there, what if they throw it away?" He said, watching you hold up his letterman jacket.

„You're right, they really havent cleaned this in ages." You looked at your friend.

She reached inside, pulling out a blue and white jacket. You took it from her and held it up. „It's cute don't you think? Kinda vintage."

„Oh my god. look." She pointed at the stitching at the right top. ‚Wally' it read in white italic letters. You looked at her. „You think it belonged to the stadium guy?"

„Possible? I mean there's other stuff in there. Maybe he wants it back." Your friend crossed her arms. „We could go to the library at lunch and look into the yearbooks to find out."

The bell rang, interrupting your little locker investigation.

„Sounds like a plan." You said, before walking to class.

—

Wally anticipated lunch break and already waited in the yearbook section, when Rhonda suddenly appeared next to him.

„What are you doing here? Aren't you busy catching gossip in the teachers lounge ?" he asked, cocking a brow at her in question.

She smirked. „I love gossip, but seeing your big star student slash jock ego getting crushed by two human girls is even more entertaining to me"

Wally mocked her smirk and rolled his eyes. He was about to reply when he heard you and your friend entering the aisle.

„1981, 1982- ah here Yearbook of 1983. The trophy cabinet has a table with all, the state champion teams and his name was listed in that year."

Rhonda leaned her head on Wally‘s shoulder, or at least as far as she could with their height difference. „Oh superstar, even state champion? Aww, if I wasn't dead I'd feel sorry."

„Fuck you, Rhonda." Wally scoffed, trying to concentrate on you skipping through the yearbook pages.

„Sorry I'm not into footballers, sweetheart." She sucked on her lollipop again, leaning against the shelf.

Wally took a deep breath. He was a nice guy, really and he liked Rhonda, but sometimes her attitude just got to him.

„Maybe, footballer dick is just what you need to get over your brooding and depressed mood."

Rhonda laughed. „ Ew." She pushed his shoulder.

„Turn to the exceptional students pages." Your friend said and flipped through the book.

There it was, a full double page.

In loving memory of Wally Clark stood under his picture. Fluffy black hair, chocolate brown eyes and charming smile, wearing the exact same jacket you found in your locker today.

„He's dead?" It sounded more like a questioin than a statement coming out of your mouth.

„Sad, he's sexy." You friend stated.

Rhonda nearly choked on her lollipop and Wally swallowed, before a smirk crept upon his lips.

„She did not just say that?" The shorter ghost crossed her arms.

„He is." You agreed before nudging your friend.

„You think he was a fuckboy ?" She laughed and you joined in. Taking the book from you she read the different things written about him.

„Look, this cheerleader wrote ‚He loved eating jelly filled donuts' Oh I'm sure he did" She wiggled her eyebrows.

„Well if I was born back then, I wouldn't mind him tasting my jelly filled donut." you said giggling.

After chattinf some more, the two of you put the book back and left, still giggling about the handsome footballer.

Wally's face burnt bright red and he felt like his cheeks were on fire. He knew that girls had found him cute back when he was alive, but he never heard girls talk about him like that.

„Congratulations stud, now you're a teenage girls' wet dream in two centuries." Rhonda joked and patted his shoulder.

„What do you mean ?" Wally asked nervously.

Of course he had sex before and he did like it rough, but he was in a relationship before he died and even now he only had one partner to relief his teenage hormones. Wally never wanted to use someone for their body, but this ‚trapped in the school as a ghost’ situation didn't really allow any relationships.

„What I mean is, that girls are or were obsessed with you. When you came to this school I couldn't go anywhere without the female students talk about ‚tall and sexy' you are and how hot you look during football practice." She made a disgusted face and Wally looked at her in shock.

„Oh and don't we forgot about your girlfriend back then. She was very descriptive to her friends about your dick and how exactly you used it to bring her to the edge."

Wally now leaned against the shelves, trying not to freak out.

„But that was long ago, most of the ghosts here died after me." He said, trying to make himself feel better.

„I don't know why you're freaking out so much? I should be freaking out. Of disgust." She tried to calm him.

„You're right. I just thought- I can't believe I was so naiive." he said, looking down.

„Hey Wally, you're a nice guy." she said, making him smile. „Still entitled tho."

He laughed and rolled his eyes.

—

A few days later you were able togive Wally's mother the stuff you found in his locker. She seemed like a nice woman and you felt a little emotional at how grateful she was.

Especially because you decided to keep the letterman jacket. You gave it to the dry cleaners and basically lived in it ever since picking it up. It was slightly oversized on you but extremly comfortable.

But there was also something different since you wore it. You felt... watched. Just like today, when you got dressed after swimming club.

After leaving the shower, you put a towel over the bench to sit down. You took little longer than usual and had the changing room to yourself.

Suddenly, it's like something tickled over your back, down to your hips. A pleasant sensation. You shivered, reaching for the jacket to cover yourself.

You called out for someone. But you really were alone. Your friend had joked earlier that Wally Clarks ghost would come for you, because you didn't give back his jacket. Luckily you didn't believe in ghosts and when you sat down on the bench, yet another thought invaded your mind.

You leaned back and opened your legs slightly. Wouldn't be the first time someone touched themselves in the locker rooms. The boys did it all the time after practice.

Your fingers travelled from your navel down to your already wet heat. Exploring your folds, before finding your clit, you closed your eyes. Wally Clark appeared behind your lids. He kneeled between your legs, strong hands holding your hips.

He kissed the creamy skin of your thighs upwards, the dreamiest of chocolate brown bedroom eyes looking up at you. He licked his plump lips before speaking against your folds, the vibration making you hiss out.

„Quite the unusual offer. Letting me eat you out so I'd forgive you for stealing." his tongue lapped up the wetness of your folds and one of his hands found your breasts, kneading them softly before pinching the nipple. One after one.

„Wally, please." You moaned and circled your clit faster. The feeling of being watched heightened your pleasure from the fantasy.

He sucked on your clit and his other hand also left your hip. Two of his fingers pushed inside you, pumping. „Mmmh" he moaned against your sensitive spot. You shivered and moaned his name again and again.

Goosebumps spread over your skin and you were sure his fingers would feel even better than your own. Shifting slightly on the bench, you were sure the towel underneath you was already soaked. The tight coil in your lower abdomen let you know you were close.

„If you weren't already late I'd edge you. Looking so pretty spread out for me on the bench." His fingers curled up and he switched between sucking and licking at your centre.

You came, biting down on your lower lip, so you wouldn't be heard in the nearby hallway. Opening your eyes, you adjusted to reality again and pulled his jacket together in front of your chest. You felt sick, pleasuring yourself to a dead boy. You decided to sit for a bit before redressing and drying your hair.

Wally still kneeled in between your legs. His lips glistened with your juices and he laughed „So much better than a jelly donut"

Licking his fingers clean, he tried to calm his nerves. His hard cock strained against the grey sweatpants, so he sat up and adjusted himself. He really tried holding back, knowing what he did was technically a grey zone of consent, but seeing you spread out on the bench, naked and wearing his jacket, he just couldn't not help you out. Also, you did say you wouldn't mind a few days ago.

He just wished you could see him. It made him dream on his own, about you two. Maybe on the bleachers or in the teachers lounge. Wally really liked the couch in the teachers lounge.

He watched you get dressed and waited for you to leave so he could take care of himself.

—

The thoughts of Wally haunted you throughout the next few weeks. Maybe his ghost did haunt you. So you decided to help the homecoming committee decorate the school with posters and decoration up until the late night to take your mind off it.

You fell asleep in the Gym. Waking up in the middle of the night on the hard floor you sighed. You were about to collect your stuff and leave when you heard a moan. Looking up, your jaw nearly dropped to the Floor.

Wally sat upon a gym mat, the ghost of a cheerleader who died in the 90s after dropping from a pyramid sat in his lap.

There was an obvious tent in his grey sweatpants. Her cheer skirt was tucked into the seam revealing her bare pussy with two of Wally's fingers knuckle deep inside. There was a wet spot on his crotch and the squishy noise of his fingers pumping at a fast pace hollowed in the gym.

Her moans were swallowed by his lips, hungrily devouring her mouth.

You squeezed your thighs together at the sight. Envious of the girl. Wally pushed a third finger inside, keeping the rough pace. The blonde girl reached down to rub her clit, but Wally slapped her hand away.

He pulled away from her, biting her bottom lip.

„You only get to do that when my cock has been inside of you."

Your head fell back against the wall. God, you must be really going crazy. Hallucinating or dreaming, but you couldn't tear your eyes away.

The blonde pouted. „M'sorry Wally."

He helped her climb off his lap before he stood up on the mat. She was already getting on all fours with spread knees. Meanwhile Wally pulled his sweatpants down, revealing his impressive girth. Getting on one knee behind her, he pumped himself with his head thrown back, before guiding himself inside her.

He started with slow thrusts, obviously not doing this for the first time. The blonde under him closed her eyes, mouth agape in pleasure.

Wally picked up the speed while kneading her asscheeks. Your eyes widened when he spread them, letting a string of his spit drip onto her other hole. He massaged it with his thumb and the blonde responded with screaming his name „Please, Wally. Please Please Please." she writhted under his touch as he pressed down with his thumb.

Your -or more his jacket felt too hot all of a sudden and you felt your hardened nipples against the fabric of your bra. Pressing your thighs together you tried to get some relief.

The blonde bit her lip to silence her pleas buz Wally slapped her cheek „No. No. No. Baby. I wanna hear you. Let them hear you." His hand went back to her ass.

„You can pleasure yourself now." he instructed and her fingers immediately found her clit, circling roughly.

After her first orgasm, he pulled out. His dick dripping with her juices, the head angry and red. Wally helped her turn on her back, legs draped over his shoulders, guiding just the tip inside.

She whimpered. „Please come on my tits, Wally. I want to taste you."

You bit your lip at her voice, full of need and desire.

He smirked and started jerking above her chest. Her hand joined him as he put his abover hers, guiding her how he liked it.

He groaned her name as he came. Thick spurts of his glassy cum decorating her rosy nipples, up to her chin, which she greedily licked up.

She started licking him clean. „Thank you, Wally. Mmmh." He pushed her head down further, and looked up.

You stared at him wide eyed as you made eye contact with him. At first his gaze looked dazed from pleasure, but then he thought you could see him.

But that wouldn't be possible would it? Humans can't see ghosts.

Wally tucked himself away and helped his companion fix herself, but when he turned around you were gone.

He was definitely going to seek you out tomorrow.

A/N: I hope you enjoyed, let me know in the comments & leave me some love 💕

#milo manheim #wally clark #milo manheim fanfiction #school spirits #wally clark smut #wally clark x reader #wally clark fanfiction

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samandcolbyownme · 1 month

Text

Summary: anon request - "can you do a zach one where he like exposes him and readers secret relationship and she just goes with it , like " you weren't so quiet last night " and she just has her jaw dropped and says something back and it ends with smut"

Warnings: this one shot will contain reader having sexual daydreams during the podcast, those dreams will include, oral (m rec), unprotected sex, the rest will contain Zach's usual banter and fluffiness

Word count: 2.1 k | not edited

Also - I know it might get confusing, but the italics are what happened the night before, but in the form as if it's happening right now, like you're replaying the night in your mind. Hope that made sense, enjoy!

╔═══━━━─── • ───━━━═══╗

"You want to know what I think is crazy?" Zach asks as his fingers drag up and down your arm.

"Hmm?" You hum quietly as you keep your head on his chest. You feel him laugh slightly, "That no one has figured us out yet."

You laugh, moving your head to look up at him, "Well now you just jinxed the hell out of that."

He shrugs, a smirk on his face, "I mean I like us being a secret and all, but it's so hard for me to not say certain things when you're on the pod with us."

You nod, "Yeah, I know what you mean." You smirk, "So what, is that your way of telling me you're going to out us at tomorrow's show?"

He raises his brows, "I'm full of surprises babe. Guess you're going to have to wait and see."

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

The next day, you're sitting on the red bench, headphones on and you're getting ready to do the show, but your mind just isn't there.

Instead it's elsewhere.

Specifically, replaying the time spent with Zach the previous night.

The way you felt coming back from the restaurant, you needed him, his hands resting on your hips as you unlock your door made you crave him.

When you finally got the door open, it was like the energy that craved one another clashed, As soon as you push the door open, he spun you around, lips on yours as he backs you into your apartment.

"Hey." A hand is woven in front of you, "Earth to y/n."

You look over at Tara and blink as you take your headphones off, "Yeah, hi. I'm here."

"Where the fuck did you go. You were like-" she mimics how you were staring, "Zoned out."

You laugh, "Sorry. I'm tired. I was up all night." Zach and Jared walk onto the set, "Oooh. Up all night doing what?" Zach teases and you roll your eyes, "I was coming up with a list of places that've already been to for Sam and Colby."

Zach sits down and raises his brows, "Wow that was very specific." Zach sighs, placing his headphones on and you can't help but laugh.

Friends around friends, lovers when it's just you two.

You lean back, placing your headphones back on and Tara speaks up, "So I have to ask, how does it feel being better than two of the most liked ghost hunters in the world?"

You laugh slightly, "What do you mean?"

"I know you do paranormal investigation stuff too, and just the fact that Sam and Colby are coming to you for stuff.. I don't know that just.." Tara laughs and you tilt your head, "Are you just saying that to make a jab at them?"

She nods and lean in to your mic, "Well then it feels pretty damn good."

"Alright, alright. Anymore and we'll be scraping your brain off the walls from your head swelling to the point of exploding." Zach tries not to laugh and you shrug, "Hey, I take it when I can."

You give him a quick and subtle wink then quickly change the subject, "Cat got Zach's tongue so I'll just go ahead and do the intro for him." You laugh, "What's up guys, we're here with Tara, Alyssa, me, Jared and oh, I guess Zach is here too."

Zach just stares at you and you can't help but laugh.

"Okay, but I love the fact that she announced Tara and me first." Alyssa laughs and you point to her. Tara nods, "Yeah, I'm going to have to say that we need to all vote to make y/n the person who announces the show."

"Like a pre-recorded track because there are days she isn't here." Alyssa points out and you nod, "I agree. All in favor." You raise your hand and instantly say, "Three versus two. Girls win."

"Youre ridiculous. Who invited you here anyway?" Zach rolls his eyes and you furrow your brows, "Um, you?"

"Can you just like, zip it." Zach motions at his mouth and you smirk, "Make me. Take my headphones away."

Zach tries not to laugh, "I mean, I can. But you might moan a little."

"Oh my god. No. No. No." you close your eyes and look away from him, but in secret, you'd be on your knees in seconds for him.

Zach places his hands on your shoulders, urging you to your knees. You drop down, complying to his every silent request.

You stare up at him as he shrugs his black jean jacket off, eyes locked on yours as his jaw is slightly slack from your hand sliding over his throbbing cock that's being held back by his jeans.

"I don't think.. you should say that to our guests?" Jared says with a nervous laugh, "I'm actually surprised you haven't gotten sued yet."

"Please." Zach shrugs, nodding to you, "She won't sue me."

Tara points to you, "I think you should just for his reaction.

You laugh, "Thinking about it."

You weren't thinking about that at all, Zach undoes his belt, followed by his jeans. The quick sound of the zipper going down causes your skin to perk up with goosebumps, caused by excitement.

You rise up from your calves, licking your lips as you work fast to free him from his boxers.

Zach speaking pulls you back into reality, "So now that we're past that embarrassing ensemble.."

Zach trails off and so does your mind, You loved hearing Zach's little moans and groans as you held his cock with your lips and tongue.

The way his fingers gentle drug over your head, slowly pulling your hair as his pleasure grew larger, "Fuck."

Zach didn't really swear in general, so when he did, and it was because of you. It was even fucking hotter.

You blink, snapping back into reality.

"So I thought we could talk about something serious today." Zach says and Jared laughs, "Oh no. Someone's getting fired."

"Yeah it's you." Zach says, pretending to be serious and Jared laughs, "I'd love to see you try, I'll just tell you no and you'll listen."

You laugh and nod, "No that's so true."

"Yeah whatever." Zach rolls his eyes, "No I have an exciting announcement."

Your heart thumps and your head snaps towards him slightly.

His eyes move to you and he smiles a little bit, "So, I have some news that may shock a lot of people, but I think everyone should know this, from me."

"What's the fuck is happening?" Tara asks and Zach sighs, speaking quickly, "We're going to be doing a live dropouts show."

You let out a breath and keep your stare on him, "Wow, Zach. That's great."

"Better be, because they want all of us who are here right now." Zach gives a thumbs up, "What a relief it was to get that off my chest."

You laugh slightly as your eyes trail down his neck to his necklace that's lying comfortably on his chest.

Your back slams onto the bed, Zach's lips kissing over any skin they can reach. You let out a moan as he sucks a hicky into the skin over your hip.

He kisses up over your boobs and up your neck. He leans up and you feel his cock slip between the folds of your pussy.

The shiny necklace dangling from his neck as you feel him slide into you fully. You find it so hot when it swings back and forth with each thrust.

"Hey, I can't lie." Jared laughs and Tara cuts him off with a yell, "Say it!"

You look over, at Tara, laughing as she keeps pointing to jared. You look over at Zach and he gives you a look that would make your legs go weak if you were standing.

It wasn't a weird look. It was him just staring at you, knowing why you keep zoning out, and he was just making it worse.

"I liked y/n's intro." Jared sighs and you look over at Jared with a clap, "Thank you."

"You definitely thought it was better than Zach's intro, right?" Alyssa asks and Jared laughs, "I'm not answering that."

You yelling with excitement, "Fuck yeah! Because you know that girls are just better than boys!" You motion between you, Tara and Alyssa.

"Whoa, whoa!" Zach says waving his hand out in front of him a few times, "Settle down. Settle down, I'm getting flashbacks."

"War flashbacks." Jared snorts and Tara asks with a laugh, "Flashbacks of what?!"

You look at Zach, laughing and he shakes his head while furrowing his brows, "I don't know what you're laughing about because these flashbacks are of how loud you were being last night."

It all happened so fast you blank, "What the fuck."

"What did he just say?" Jared asks, mouth dropped with surprise.

"Oh yeah, okay." Tara rolls her eyes and as you're still staring at Zach, he tilts his head slightly, giving his brows a quick flick.

He outted you at tomorrow's show.

Might as well roll with it.

"You gonna tell them or you want me to, princess?" Zach smirks and you shrug, letting out a dramatic sigh, "Whatever helps you sleep at night."

"Oh, you know exactly what helps me sleep at night." Zach winks as you look at him and you shake your head, looking down to rest it in your hand.

"I can't tell if they're joking." Alyssa laughs and Tara cuts in, "Yeahhh, I mean, okay. I've actually been extremely suspicions about these two for weeks now."

"Oh please tell us what made you think that, Tara." Jared leans in, super invested into the conversation.

You look up and look from Tara to Zach and he shrugs, "Hit me." He nods to Tara and she smirks, looking between you and Zach, "Well for starters, he stares at her every time she looks away."

"I like looking at the back of her head. It makes it so I don't have anything mean to say." Zach shrugs and you just laugh.

"What else you got, Tara?" Jared encourages and Tara laughs, "Another thing is, they'll stop answering me at both at the same time. Like I'll be texting both of them and then all of a sudden.. radio silence."

"I have a very strict bed time, Tara." You and Zach both say, just adding fuel to the fire and you just laugh, knowing that you're caught.

"See!" Tara tells pointing, "See!"

"Well.. if you don't know you do now." Zach laughs and Jared eggs him on, "Know what? Zach. Care to enlighten us with a perfect confirmation?"

"What's my lawyer?" Zach yells looking around as he raises his hand.

"So isn't true? You and.." Alyssa points from you to Zach and you laugh, nodding your head slowly.

"Wow." Jared says, "I honestly did not expect this is come out onto the podcast today."

Zach reaches for his water and takes a sip, "Listen, we played dumb, but we knew what we were doing." Zach scoffs, "Alright. You can't tell me that you weren't fooled."

"I knew my suspicions were there for a reason." Tara laughs, "How long?"

"Two months." You laugh and they don't believe you. Zach nods, "No she's serious. It was after the episode with Jake and Johnnie."

"Oh shit, yeah I guess that was two months ago." Tara nods, "I'm just like.. having a holy fuck moment."

"Yeah." Zach laughs, "She came to see if I was as rich as I bragged that I was, and I must have passed inspection because she didn't go home that night."

"Oh my god." You laugh, "That's not.." you shake your head and Jared laughs, "I just.. that really does shock me, like.. y/n. Why him?"

You shrug, smiling as you look over at Zach. He glances at you and smirks, "What can I say? I'm full of surprises."

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

Thank you for reading! Let me know how you liked it. Love you all! Thank you so much for reading!

Likes and reblogs are majorly appreciated!

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avatar-anna · 1 year

Text

Unknown Number

someone made a request about reader accidentally being given harry's number, but i accidentally deleted it, so if you requested it, here it is!

(the text chain will be from harry's point of view)

italics: y/n (unknown number)

bold: harry

Part Two

Part Three

Unknown Number (UN): heyy. i had a really good time the other night. maybe we could do it again sometime? xx (click to download image)

Harry Styles (HS): How did you get this number?

UN: you gave it to me?

UN: last night at the pub? marcus, right?

HS: No. You have the wrong number.

UN: is this a joke? are you fucking with me right now?

HS: No.

UN: oh my god

UN: i feel like such an idiot

UN: one of the first times a guy gives me his number at a bar and he gives me the wrong number

UN: probably on purpose too

UN: i should've known when he left his OWN APARTMENT the next morning but i was actually hopeful

UN: and now i've made an ass of myself here too. sorry to bother you i'll leave you alone. sorry again

(one hour later)

HS: It's okay. Sorry about that guy. Sounds like a jerk.

(twenty minutes later)

UN: it's fine, i guess

UN: i wasn't in love with him or anything but he could've had the decency of expressing his disinterest himself instead of hiding behind a fake number.

HS: That is quite a dick move.

HS: I'm not gonna lie, I wasn't expecting that text. I didn't open the picture either by the way.

UN: thank you. for a moment i was worried i was messaging a creep, but hopefully you're not a creep

UN: i mean you could be still and i'd have no idea

UN: maybe i should stop texting you

(ten minutes later)

HS: I'm not a creep.

UN: that's exactly what a creep would say

HS: I don't really know how to prove it to you. You're the one who sent me a photo of yourself half naked. You could be the creep.

UN: you said you didn't open it!

HS: I was trying to be polite!

UN: great now some 40 year old living in his parents basement has one of my nudes

HS: I'm not 40! And I don't live in my parents basement

UN: you text like an old man

HS: wuld u rather i txt like ths???

UN: no but i'm just saying i don't know many people my age who use proper punctuation in text messages

HS: Well I might not be your age, but I'm certainly not 40

UN: "certainly not." you're right. you sound like my grandpa

HS: I suddenly regret restarting a conversation with you

UN: you know despite the fact that you might be catfishing me, i've enjoyed this. i feel like i'm doing what all the other teen girls did in high school at sleepovers

HS: So you're out of high school.

UN: creep!

HS: You outed yourself, that's not on me.

UN: you...might be right

UN: can you tell me something about yourself to make it even? there's always a possibility that you could be lying and i have no reason to trust you, but...idk i feel like i can

HS: Well that's stupid.

HS: But I suppose since I've already seen you partially naked...

UN: i'm blocking your number

HS: My first name is H, and I'm 20 years old.

UN: h? just the letter h?

HS: You could be a creep too for all I know

UN: fair enough. i'm june

HS: Full name? Wow, you really are a dummy.

UN: don't get your 60 year old panties in a twist. it's a nickname

HS: June is a nickname?

HS: And I'm not 60.

UN: june. june bug. that's what the folks call me

HS: Folks? Now who sounds old?

UN: whatever

(thirty minutes later)

HS: Well, it was nice talking to you, June. June bug.

UN: you too h

(three days later)

June (J): you're a guy right?

HS: I'm sorry?

J: well when i first texted you i thought you were a guy, but you weren't THAT guy, so i have no idea

J: i just assumed but i thought i would ask

J: plus i need solicited guy advice and if you're not a creep i would really appreciate it

HS: We're back to me being a creep?

J: it's a risk every time i text you

J: so? are you a dude?

HS: Yes.

J: great! can i ask you something?

HS: Um...I guess...

J: ok. would you ever get offended if a woman covered their drink during a conversation with you?

HS: I'm not following...

J: like say we're at a bar and we're talking and i turn my head away for some reason but i put my hand over my drink until i look back at you to prevent it from being spiked. would you be offended by that?

HS: No. Why?

J: see? i don't think that's unreasonable. some loser got mad at me for doing that. well EXCUSE ME for not immediately trusting the guy i matched with on tinder

J: who was not as cute in real life i might add

HS: You don't have the best taste in guys.

J: that is not advice!

HS: Okay, here's my advice: don't swipe right on guys who have mirror selfies in their profile.

J: ...

J: ok fair enough but it's not like prince charmings are falling from the sky. it's hard out here

HS: I'm sure.

J: what you don't have the same problem?

HS: I don't really date.

J: in like a douchey way? are you one of those guys who say they just fuck?

HS: I just don't have time for dating, I guess.

J: so no special someone?

HS: No.

(four hours later)

HS: If you asked for advice, does that mean I can too?

(one hour later)

J: sorry i was at work

J: and i don't see why not

HS: What do you think about guys who wear skinny jeans?

J: hm...i think styled right it could be nice

J: YSL is kind of pushing the whole skinny jeans and chelsea boots thing which might eventually trickle down to the losers i match with on tinder so...why not? i say dress how you want

J: any guy who has a good sense of style is sexy to me

J: sorry if that wasn't the answer you were looking for

HS: Yes and no. I've been experimenting with different styles. Sometimes I get a little in my head about it.

J: doesn't everyone?

HS: I guess you're right.

HS: Do you follow fashion shows and things like that?

HS: That's not too personal, is it?

J: no, but it's kind of embarrassing

HS: Not as embarrassing as sending a complete stranger a picture of yourself in your bra

J: harsh...but fair

J: fashion is kind of my religion

J: i'm trying to become a stylist. keyword trying

HS: That's cool!

J: tell that to my family

HS: they don't support you?

J: nope! but i'm gonna do it anyway!

HS: Do you have a favorite designer?

J: it kinda depends on the year and who was creative director at the time, but the first time i got my hands on vintage vivienne westwood i was hooked

J: you?

HS: I'm just starting to explore the fashion world I guess you could say.

J: well lucky for you i happen to be a bit of an encyclopedia when it comes to house codes

HS: House codes?

J: oh boy. i hope you're comfortable. we might be here a while

(two days later)

HS: Have you ever had rumors spread about you?

J: i don't think so

J: oh wait! in eighth grade this girl in my class told everyone i made out with a boy at the school dance which was NOT true

J: it was just a peck

HS: Naughty.

J: it was harmless. why do you ask?

HS: There's a rumor going around about me. It's just frustrating when people actually believe it. sometimes it gets to the point where i start to believe it myself.

J: i'm sorry. i won't pry or anything, but i know what it feels like to not be understood

HS: I just hate the feeling of being under a microscope. It's exhausting. I feel like my life isn't my own sometimes.

J: that sucks

J: sorry that was in no way helpful, but i don't really know what to say. is there someone you can talk to about this?

HS: ...

J: oh! i actually feel kind of honored

J: well, obviously i don't know the whole situation, but maybe try and surround yourself with people who don't scrutinize you so much?

HS: Easier said than done.

J: true but i think if you have a solid group of people who know you and understand you and like you for who you are, it's easier to deal with things like rumors and being under the proverbial microscope, you know?

J: and don't be afraid to get rid of the toxic people in your life! it's not easy but you'll be better off in the long run

HS: sometimes it's hard to tell who's toxic and who's not

J: start with the people who would never believe a rumor about you, or the ones who would never START one about you

HS: Well said, June Bug.

J: thanks! maybe i should entertain a career in counseling

(one month later)

HS: Why June Bug?

J: i was born in the summer. it was a nickname my grandparents gave me. been called that ever since

HS: That's sweet.

J: there are worse nicknames i suppose. i have a cousin that got stuck with chip because he used to stuff his face like a chipmunk when he was little

HS: Yikes.

J: you're telling me

(three weeks later)

J: have you ever danced alone in your bedroom to stevie nicks?

HS: Have you?

J: i have, and can i just say she does NOT get enough credit as a songwriter?

HS: Edge of Seventeen?

J: edge of seventeen

J: i went on a date last week with a guy who had the AUDACITY to call her music mediocre

HS: You didn't see him again did you?

J: ...

HS: June!

J: just once! and only because he had really nice hands

HS: I don't get how that would make you stay with a stevie hater...

J: REALLY nice hands ;)

HS: You disappoint me sometimes.

J: ;))))

(fifteen minutes later)

J: hey you never answered my question about dancing in your room!

HS: ...No comment...

(one week later)

J: you ever been in love, h?

HS: I can't say that I have. Have you?

J: no ://

J: i think i want it too much. i've always just been in love with the idea of falling in love, you know?

J: but the reality isn't what i thought it would be

HS: I'm sorry.

HS: It probably won't help but I'm sure you'll find someone. You seem like a great person. Anyone would be lucky to be with you.

J: aw h you're making me blush!

HS: But perhaps you should stop looking for love on a hookup app

J: annnd good feeling gone

(two weeks later)

HS: Guess who has two thumbs and got invited to Paris Fashion Week!

J: no fair!

J: and that joke doesn't work if i can't see you point to yourself. it doesn't work period

HS: I will let that slide because I know you're just jealous.

J: are you kidding me? OF COURSE i'm jealous! i can't believe you get to see Alessandro Michele's work up close

HS: Who?

J: don't think because we only communicate through text that i can't strangle you

HS: Relax. I'm only joking.

HS: Alessandro is a friend ;))

(ten minutes later)

J: sorry i just had to scream into my pillow

J: what exactly do you do again?

HS: I told you. I work in the industry.

J: but that could mean anything! the cosmetics industry, the movie industry, the meat packing industry...

HS: Meat packing?

J: you know what i mean!

HS: I do a lot of PR.

J: see. that wasn't so hard now was it?

HS: Can I go back to gloating?

J: only if you promise to give me a full report afterwards you go to all the shows

HS: Deal.

(four days later)

HS: Favorite movie?

J: that's hard...

J: it's probably cliche but the devil wears prada

HS: Good choice.

J: what about you?

HS: The Notebook.

J: really?

HS: Yes. Why?

J: do you say that to impress girls or because it's actually your favorite?

HS: Would you rather I have said a film with lots of car chases?

J: no

J: but i went out with a guy who was a film major once

HS: Is that a bad thing?

J: let's just say it won't be happening again

J: he thought he was superior for disliking popular movies. i hate that

HS: Well, I love The Notebook and I love Ryan Gosling

J: now THAT is something we can agree on!

(six weeks later)

J: BIG NEWS

J: LIKE HUGE

J: GROUNDBREAKING

HS: And here I was thinking you forgot about me.

J: i texted you yesterday

HS: You asked me if my dick could move on its own.

J: a legitimate question! i nearly had a heart attack when i saw it in person

J: but i was also weirdly fascinated. my question was purely scientific!

HS: You said you had news?

J: right!

(twenty minutes later)

HS: Are you making me wait to create anticipation?

J: no sorry i got a phone call.

J: i got my first real gig as a stylist

HS: That's great! Congratulations!

J: thanks

HS: You don't sound excited anymore. What happened to all caps?

J: my mother happened

HS: Still not on board, then?

J: she told me it was a waste of time and that i should get a real job

HS: You're still gonna take it though right?

J: i don't know. maybe she's right. the pay is less than ideal. more like i'm being paid in experience, and it's not the clientele i was imagining...

HS: But it's a foot in the door, right? That's something.

J: i guess

HS: Make connections. Get good references. And who knows, you might actually enjoy yourself.

J: you're right.

J: it's for some up and coming band that's going on tour. pretty sure i was what they could afford

HS: Don't sell yourself short. You're gonna do great.

J: thanks. i hardly even know you and you're currently my biggest supporter

HS: What happened to Bill?

J: ancient history

HS: What was wrong with him? He seemed nice.

J: yeah

J: his girlfriend thought so too.

HS: On behalf of all men: Sorry. We truly are the worst.

J: agreed. what about you? still single?

HS: Yes, though people keep trying to set me up on dates.

J: the horror!

HS: Ha ha

HS: I just want to meet someone on my own terms.

J: i get that

J: i just want to meet someone who's actually a decent human being

HS: I'll be on the lookout.

(three weeks later)

J: i think i've decided that tour life is not for me

HS: oh?

J: yeah. sitting on a bus for hours and hours with only myself to keep me company? no thanks

HS: it can't just be you on the bus can it?

J: no but i have a hard time making friends right away. and a lot of the crew for this tour are older than me

HS: are your clients nice at least?

J: yeah. one of them tried to hit on me, which i guess i should take as a compliment, but i am on the clock. no flirting for me

HS: a professional then. or are you not into the musician type?

J: not sure. i haven't dated one before

J: i told you that the other day

HS: right. must've slipped my mind

HS: but back to taste in men. is it all about looks for you or do you like funny guys?

HS: are you the type to sleep with someone on the first date? because i feel like that's very telling about a girl

J: who is this?

HS: what do you mean? it's me

J: it's not. you're not texting like a middle aged woman and you're acting like a total ass

HS: Sorry. I thought I'd try something new. And I was just curious. Can't blame a guy for asking right? You did send some guy you barely knew a picture of yourself

HS: It was very wholesome by the way. Maybe try a little more skin next time and you'll get the response you want. You can practice here if you'd like.

J: oh my god

HS: What?

J: this was a mistake. i'm such an IDIOT

J: was this some kind of prank?

J: whoever you are, you're sick

J: don't text me again

HS: June, I'm so sorry. That was my friend he was just being stupid.

HS: Last time I leave my phone anywhere.

HS: June?

HS: June please.

HS: That wasn't me I swear!

HS: I'm sorry.

(three weeks later)

HS: Day 21 of trying to get you to respond.

HS You probably blocked me which is fine. I don't blame you.

HS: But if you DO happen to read these and are just ignoring me...

HS: I'm sorry. Again. For like the millionth time.

J is typing...

HS: June?

J: i should've blocked you

HS: Why didn't you?

J: because as insane as it sounds, you've become a close friend

HS: I feel the same. I'm really sorry about before. I swear it was one of my mates. I would never say something like that.

J: that's what makes this whole thing crazy! i don't actually know you, so how do i know if i can trust you?

HS: I mean you even noticed that he wasn't texting like me. I would never ask you questions like that, June. I never have.

HS: And I do NOT text like a middle aged woman by the way

J: i guess that's true

J: i think it just doubled down the fact that we don't actually know each other. this whole thing is ridiculous if you think about it too long. it gives me a headache sometimes.

J: i know we've joked about it but...this could be potentially dangerous

HS is typing...

HS: I could send you a voice note.

J: you would do that?

HS: You're right. This whole thing is ridiculous but...I don't know, I trust you, and I consider you a friend.

J: a friend you say?

HS: That's all I'm willing to admit for one day

J: and what about tomorrow?

HS is typing...

HS (voice recording): Maybe tomorrow I'll admit a little more.

(one day later)

Y/n hated how much her stomach flipped every time her phone pinged with a new message.

It was so reckless and dangerous and utterly ridiculous. She didn't know who H was, she didn't even know what time zone he lived in, and yet she felt like she knew him.

And after hearing his deep voice—deep British voice—on the voice recording, Y/n determined that he wasn't some creep in his forties like she'd originally thought.

Since sending that voice recording, they'd sent each other messages like that all night. And by all night she meant all night. They stayed up late sending voice recordings back and forth. It was the longest conversation they'd held to date, which was surprising considering that they often missed each other during certain hours. Just based on what hours of the day they texted the most, Y/n figured H lived somewhere in Europe, which gave her peace of mind considering he couldn't exactly kidnap her if he was a whole ocean away. But the last couple weeks their schedules seemed to be lining up, though Y/n chalked it up to all the traveling she'd been doing lately.

One thing she was certain of was that she adored H's voice. It was soft and deep, but got raspier the longer they spoke. And at times he would whisper in his messages, like he had to keep his voice down. The hushed tones made her shiver.

Y/n didn't call H, and he never offered. But she wanted to, boy did she want to. No matter how terrifying that thought was. A full-fledged phone call seemed more...real to Y/n. With the messages, she and H were still in their little bubble. It was stupid, but she needed that bit of separation. She was becoming attached to someone she'd never met.

Walking through the halls of a stadium in Canada, Y/n pulled up past conversations with H. It was too embarrassing to admit to anyone out loud, but she felt like she really knew him. He was endearing, had a silly sense of humor, had good taste in music, and was honest. Well, as honest as either of them could be. Outside of the one slip up with H's friend, Y/n believed what he said to her over text. Maybe that made her naive, but their conversations were legit. He felt like a friend, and she knew he felt similarly.

Maybe tomorrow I'll admit a little more.

Y/n had no idea what that could mean. She of course knew what she wanted it to mean, but what she wanted rarely ever lined up with reality.

Y/n looked up from her phone to make sure she didn't pass the right door. The one in front of her read, Harry Styles in big bold lettering. She quickly hurried past and continued down the hall to where the dressing room for Five Seconds of Summer was.

Harry Styles was a bit of an enigma. Even though she was on the same tour as him and One Direction, Y/n hardly ever saw him. And when she did, his nose was always in his phone, completely closed off to the world around him. He just had this vibe that said, "don't talk to me," and Y/n received that message loud and clear. The Five Seconds of Summer boys seemed to get on with all the members of One Direction, but Y/n usually made herself scarce whenever they came by the dressing room, for no other reason than too much testosterone in one room.

"You want to come out after the show, Harry?" Y/n heard one of the boys ask. Michael.

"Um...No. I think I'll have to pass tonight, boys. Sorry."

"What? Big date tonight?"

"Something like that."

Y/n felt frozen to the linoleum floor. She knew that voice. She'd spent all night listening to that voice.

"Holy shit."

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