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hijackalx · 7 months

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*SOME DURGE QUEST SPOILERS*

***NONCON AND DRUG USE MENTIONS***

GORTASH SFW HEADCANONS:

ok to start i think when he was a prisoner his hair got rlly long and unkept and he hateddd it so the minute he escaped he chopped that shit off himself and thats why its so unruly lol (*EDIT he always cuts his own hair is what im sayin)

this man is such a taurus like everything about him screams taurus. has a taurus stellium fosho

would listen to superheaven

hes also sooo jenny by studio killers, disco man by remi wolf, happiness by the 1975 coded with Durge 😩😩

with durge hes also giving bf that ur dad hates but like thats canon. i think he likes that hes able to influence durge to the point that they rebel lol. the type of boy u run away with when ur younger

probably BLASTED jet black heart by 5SOS on repeat when Durge disappeared LMFAOO

also i kind of feel like the fearless buff to his clothing is more an insight to his character rather than him needing magic to not be fearful bcz he literally got the shit beat out of him everyday and lived in HELL how can he not be desensitized to everything at that point 😭😭😭 it does not get much worse than that my boy

hes so thique like hes just a big boned dude. tiddies SO fat too EUGH + thick shoulders/arms. he feels so warm and safe i just know it i just KNOW it gurl

also idk if it was supposed to happen but in my latest playthrough during the fight with him he dropped his bow and just started beating the shit out of us 😭😭😭😭 all hands baby like WHAT 😭😭 so i like to think thats his preferred method of fighting idk if thats canon tho i feel like i seen somebody talking abt that before but mightve just been another hc

occasionally does drugs. likes the ones that make him feel really elated (idk what theyre called in bg3 its some kind of dust or something) ALSO HC THAT HE WAS ON SOMETHING WHEN HE WROTE RHAT FUCKED UP NOTE TO FRANC (WAS THAG HIS NAME U GUYS KNOW THE NOTE) HE WAS OBVIOJSLY TRIPPING BALLSSSSS

lots of body hair…… everywhere……. straight and black body hair. that is so sexy to me let me smell the pheromones in your armpits king LMFAO (i think theres something wrong with me)

going off of rhat yes i think he smells good (DIVINE, even) as a woman that is feral and in heat all the time. but to normal ppl he may smell kind of weird. not STINKY stinky but like when u dont shower and ur natural scent starts to mix with the perfume/cologne ur wearing SORRY 😭😭😭 im trying to be realistic here. or maybe like when u wake up and didnt shower the night before and u can still smell the perfume/cologne u put on yesterday. basically what im saying is he might need to shower

hes just so masculine it drives me crazy I LOVE MEN !!!!!!!!!! I LOVE EEENERM. ME E WN

love language:

giving = lowkey getting acts of service vibes here but u didnt hear it from me 🤫🤐 gift giving too. tav is just his widdle babie and he wants to make sure theyre the happiest they can be 🥺😩

receiving = acts of service LMAO give and get back type of shit

relationship wise i think he is the most doting and sweetest person. like tav will never have to worry abt anything ever again bcz he will handle everything. takes care of them cuz they are his king/queen 😌

GORTASH NSFW HEADCANONS:

yeah going off that last hc he is sweet outside the bedroom but a menace in it. its just the way he is. its probably exhausting too 😩 like if u ask him to be gentler/less intense he will try for a while but probably wont enjoy it as much. he doesnt like to hold back.

i WILL say tho ☝🏻🤨 i think when he gets close to finishing he gets a little more soft/loving. he just has to get his badness out first yall its fine

HIGH libido wants to smash all the time. he also (POSSIBLE NONCON MENTION !!!!!!!) thinks that since ur his u should be willing to give it up whenever he wants it. (NONCON MENTION OVER) i think in the bedroom he sees u as a servant even if ur considered his equal normally. like hes a chosen of bane he has to feel like he has control over u in SOME way

can be selfish depending on his mood. sometimes he doesnt see u as anything other than a toy (lowkey hard for me to admit but i NEVA LIE GIRLS !!!!! 🙅🙅🙅) like can be such a fucking asshole about it too

BUT !!! when he is feeling generous he is soooo generous. EUGH like he will make sure u enjoy urself!!!! probably multiple times !!!!!!!!!!!!

dont know why nobody else has said he has a daddy kink. so obvious like call him daddy ms thing he will nut so hard. oh corruption kink too. like can u imagine Durge being so innocent when they first met cuz they were never allowed to get close to anybody and hes just sooo into it HELLO i got to write that fic NEOW

omg breeding kink too give him heirs. will fuck the shitttt out of u in a mating press. probably comes a lot too almost impossible not to get pregnant with him LMAO

likes to pick u up and fuck u. manhandling king. also will do the faerun equivalent to coke and wants u to do it w him then fuck nasty afterwards

i feel like he doesnt last an extremely long time. 15-20 mins is THE MOST youre getting out of him lol he just gets very excited (which is lowkey kind of cute??)

do i even have to say that this man is packing schmeat. heavy dick. heavy balls. allow me to bear some of that weight for u my liege 🤲🏻🧎

ORIN BONUS ????:

mostly nsfw

ok i didnt originally plan to add orin but listen….. gortash is a charismatic guy….. imagine orin was into him too LISTEN ! like shes jealous asf of Durge in that sense too not just bcz of them being bhaal’s fav. like when i think abt them i just am getting a vibe okay. this trio……..

every time she sees gortash and Durge acting close and doing all their yucky lovesick shit she just gets soooo mad. now imagine she shifts into Durge to get gortash to fuck her. yeah… yall seeing the vision? would he ever find out ?? imagine that was why he hates orin so much?? he doesnt want to tell Durge (cuz thats cheating hes not a cheater duh 🙄 plus hes scared theyll be mad at him) and thats why his explanations as to why he hates orin are so vague

#bg3 #baldurs gate 3 #baldurs gate #enver gortash #x reader #gortash #gortash x durge #gortash x tav #gortash x reader #headcanons #bg3 headcanons #my headcanons #dark urge x gortash

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sanchoyo · 3 years

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danny phantom episode 4-7 Thoughts: (under a readmore because, these got kinda long!)

-the outfit danny had to buy for dash's party. CLASSIC 2000S i cannot stop laughing. And also showing up to the party and everyone is dressed like the trio is hilarious. and further proof that everyone looks good dressed goth.

-dash has a closet full of cute lil bear plushies?? LOVE that. adorable. also his response to danny trashing his room fighting a ghost was SO valid if somone BROKE MY BED IN HALF ID BE PISSED TOO.

-technus being like 'oh smart, u should be a tutor!' then later being like 'forget tutor, be a teacher!' :) supportive king <3 I also really like his upgraded suit/design. AND SPOCK CAMEO??? HELLO??

-the music in this show is super. its so funky. I looked it up and the guy who does it, guy moon (awesome name) also did music for other cartoons like fairly odd parents, barnyard, chalkzone, billy & mandy, AND some actual movies like FIGHT CLUB??? the whiplash I got from reading that)

-sam being rich explains a lot about her, actually.

-I know the moral of the episode was supposed to be 'dont ditch your friends for popular people/spend a lot of money on clothes that arent You to Fit In'. but tbh. it wouldve been easy for danny to have been like 'well, okay, ill come but only if my friends can!' but I get. that hes 14. so. not a lot to say there.

-BOX GHOST IS BACK!!!!! also, danny sitting up and wearing the dress/wig/makeup. umm thats how I dress everyday LMFAO. unironically me. (hate the jokes that boil down to 'haha funney man in dress' tho. but this is a look)

-jazz being protective of her brother once again being like NOOO YOU GUYS BETTER NOT STAKE OUT HIS (actually haunted) LOCKER!! shes aware of how people perceive him and she wants to help :( which is also probably why she told dash to invite him to that party even tho she had no interest in going!! she wants to help him out :(

-gotta say im with tucker on the whole 'should danny use his powers to get back at bullies' debate. 100% yes. let him teach kids to fight back. making dash throw his food at paulina out of the blue? no. but when hes actually about to pick on someone? yeah! for self defense? YEAH! if dash and his friends just threw food at him, I think rather than. idk doing sneaky shit with frogs he couldve just threw it back and not pulled punches if they tried to fight. I kNOOWWW its a kids show so they are like 'if u fight back ur just as bad!! violence bad!!' but. theyre HIS POWERS. WHO CARES.

-like my only gripe is that dash really isnt LEARNING ANYTHING WHEN DANNY GETS BACK AT HIM IN THE MOST PETTY INDIRECT WAYS. whatever they had to add a bully psa episode I guess. I hate it and I hate the way cartoons usually handle it because these methods simply Do Not Work. 'aND YouRE USinG YOur poWErs FOR EVill???!' this is Not Evil. even when poindexter takes dannys body, theyre only being 'nice' bc hes stealing soda for them!! bitches deserve what they get (nothing too brutal bc theyre high schoolers but damn, if they pick on danny he doesnt need to be the 'bigger person' he needs to start biting people)

-SAM TRYING TO SMUGGLE FROGS OUT OF THE BIO LAB?? girl in middle school when we had to dissect frogs we could opt out, also, they came to us already dead and preserved...

-sidney's lingo and the fact hes in black and white is sending me. also, danny is a ghost celebrity apparently for being a halfa?? ok. thats interesting to know

-the DENTIST BEING EXCITED ABOUT THE COTTON CANDY FLOOD IS THE FUNNIEST THING SO FAR.

-I LOOOVE the trope of 'wishes gone wrong'. not crazy about the stereotypical genie, or the use of the dreamcatcher looking design. (also, I KNOW theyre scientists but the way theyre handling a cold...are the fentons ANTIVAX)

-the genie. she. whitewished paulina. JKASDFHKJ. (the ghost literally just being hello kitty???? im dying) 'why do i feel that im special and wonderful? because I AM! <3' paulina ilu self worth queen. felt bad for her also getting possessed by (2) boys later who were arguing INSIDE HER. WTF.

-imagine being the guy trapped in his now flying car. he thought danny and tucker were HALUCINATIONS. imagine being trapped in a flying car with two, what you think are imaginary arguing 14 year olds convinced ur gonna die. i WOULD say this dude is gonna need so much therapy, but he seemed totally fine and excited when they landed (I would be happy too if a chicken was on my head. chickens rule) stoner rights

-sam's bat slippers??? iconic. SO cute.

-I think desiree's backstory is so :( do all ghosts have messed up sad backstories?? poindexter's was sad too...cannot imagine box ghost has any kind of fucked up backstory. but what if. his mom got pushed off cliffs by boxes...........a la cruella... anyway her 'no man may lay a hand on me' iconic. ilu

-I know danny has no concept of how much bras cost but my god dont attack tucker with some girls bra. those are so expensive.

-its really. well its not a GOOD THING he went into the portal and got fucked up, but its good danny was the one to do it rather than sam or tucker. because even tho he was being influenced by desiree and kept getting more malicious and it prob wasnt 100% him...he sucked as a ghost like most the people he 'pranked' were innocent ppl just Chillin and he didnt want to help anyone at all. I think danny is the most responsible out of them but also, hes 14 and shouldnt HAVE to feel obligated to fight every ghost. hes a good kid and wants to, but I also feel like he feels like...responsible for the portal turning on?? because his parents did give it up,, but it was an accident and not his fault (if anything, why was the on switch on the inside. why was it that easy. why was there no safety measures. that seems like smth OSHA needs to hear about). like thats my son. hes a good boy. and hes never done anything wrong in his life, ever. if anyone hurts him im killing everyone in this room and then myself. etc.

-danny's curfew is 10PM????? DUDE. when I was 14...shit I couldn't be out that late, I had to be back at like, 8 at the latest, and my parents had to know exactly where and who I was going with, AND i had to call/text them regularly...is this a case of my parents being overbearing, or the fentons sucking??? the only time i could EVER be out that late was if I was at an overnight sleepover or smth...

-the vultures have lil fezes. why do they have fezes...theyre so fuckin funny 'ask him for directions' 'I KNOW WHERE IM GOING' these ghost vultures are my new grandpas. pick them up, put them in the adopt box.

-'I wonder why those guys were trying to waste dad!' THEYRE GHOSTS. YOUR DAD HUNTS GHOSTS. why is that not a conclusion you'd immediately jump to??

-*jazz voice, clearly disgusted* WISCONSIN???

-mrs fenton with the lab coat and leg warmers and PERM. YESSS STYLISH.

-was going to say 'ew billionaire' @vlad but. super valid he used his powers to assumedly steal and cheat to get that money, thats how all billionaires do it! but ew hes a SIMP. and spending your billions on FOOTBALL STUFF?? you are Not Valid overall. I DO respect the fact you have a castle instead of a mansion. in wisconsin. if youre going to be stupidly rich might as well go all out, torches on the wall and all. I DO like his ghost form's little kitty ears. catman. and his cape! every design can benefit from a cape. and how different his forms look, like danny looks the EXACT SAME IN BOTH FORMS ASIDE FROM COLOR CHANGES. vlad's is like,, I could believe they were different people!! also I love the drama. but dude you are fighting a 14 year old. lame. also he was like, telling danny he wanted his mom and him and like, wanted him to renounce his dad?? WHAT ABOUT JAZZ?? bitch. those r MY kids and they are both important and special. I do agree they need better parents but thats not u sir <3

-I thought vlad's 'little badger' nickname for danny came from the football mascot of the packers, but google says they have NO MASCOT?? so now I'm like?? is it because his hair is sometimes black and sometimes white?? I hate to give him props but thats a PERFECT NICKNAME. theyre also tiny and vicious!

-why did I get so excited that Skulker is back!! its been like. 2-3 eps LMAO. AND THE DAIRY KING. ICONIC I LOVE HIM. hes the nicest guy ever :) more nice ghosts please. danny cannot be fighting alone everytime with no ghost buds like every ghost being hostile sucks :(

-mr. fenton knew vlad was controlling him, but a few episodes ago he had no clue danny was doing the same thing...is it something about how malicious the ghost is?? he just seemed to think his memory had gaps the first time, this time he was INSTANTLY LIKE 'GHOST'. then again in this ep when danny did it again he was just slightly confused but not immediately freaking out like he did with vlad possessing him!!

-'my parents will accept ME NO MATTER WHAT' so. so why haven't you come out to them yet, danny?? if you really think that?? if theres no harm, and you're sure??? if vlad is a real problem, wouldnt that make dealing with him easier, to expose him???? SO WHY HAVENT YOU COME OUT YET?? COULD IT BE,, MAYBE YOU HAVE DOUBTS ABOUT WHETHER YOUR PARENTS ACTUALLY WILL ACCEPT YOU??? 🤔 ... 🏳‍🌈 I get why people say He Is Trans. I totally totally get u danny.

-sorta unrelated, but it just occurred to me in one of these eps they go to casper HIGH not casper middle school??? theyre 14?? dont highschools usually do ages 15-18? (I didnt go to hs so I might be wrong, if I am ignore this...) freshmen are usually 14-15, could just be a case of them not turning 15 yet but they will sometime in the school year (I say they because tucker said he was 14 too)? I know the show has 3 seasons, so by the end of it will they be older? thatd be neat but usually cartoon characters stay the same age...I love shows where you can see the characters age and grow up, though...three seasons seems like a long time to spend on like, 1 year...

#sanchoyorambles #danny phantom #me on the first post:#its not a liveblog!#me this time: it kinda is. but not in the same format as my tmm one #i like doing one post for a handful of eps bc it saves time #and crowds my blog less #and also i just like talking abt what im watching lol #dp thoughts

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franeridart · 4 years

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Anon said: i dont know what blue lock is but that art you just posted is making me interested lol

AHHHHH please getting people interested in it is all my life is about lately hahahaha it’s a sports manga about soccer! Kind of!! Definitely has all the good sides of sports manga, but it’s also different enough from the usual sports manga that I know people who aren’t huge sports manga fan who loved every second of it, please do give it a try if you find yourself with the time for it! It’s such a cool manga!!!

Anon said: I don't even like BNHA anymore, haven't for more than a year, but your blog still has me shipping the characters somehow. I live for your KiriBaku content (and your KamiJirou stuff, when you post it!)

Gosh, I’m glad I can make you like them still!! It’s such a compliment, honestly ;A; <3

Anon said: so i was looking through your art and stuff and was wondering "hey i wonder if theyve ever drawn voltron stuff" and tbh, i didnt expect you to have

To be fair, if you checked it means that at least a little you thought it was possible lol I haven’t watched anything past s1 of it though, so the chances of me ever picking it up again are less than zero

Anon said: You... are one of the loves of my life... and also the main reason I check tumblr everyday lol.

Anon!!! You’re gonna make me blush here!!!!! ;;;; thank you so much!

Anon said: i started reading bluelock because of u and now im obsessed soooo,,,,, thanks!❤️😭

SO HAPPY TO HEAR THAT!!!!!

Anon said: Hii, do you have a Spotify account? If you do, can you share it? I really like the songs u use on your arts, and I would love to see your Playlists Sorry if it's already on your FAQ, I didn't find it And sorry for my bad English ps. I LOVE YOUR KIRIBAKU ARTS THANK YOU

I don’t! I listen to all my music from youtube, because I’m that kind of person lmao happy to hear we share music tastes, though! And thank you so much!!! <3

Anon said: What's your favorite arc of ToG both story wise and art wise?

SCREAMS I don’t know!!!! I’ve been thinking about this ask since getting it I have genuinely zero clue I love all arcs so much for so many different reasons!!!!! The first that comes to mind when I think about it is the workshop battle arc, because I love Viole with everything I have and the whole arc (plus the build up to it too!!) hurts in the most wonderful way, but then I keep thinking about it and I realize there’s so many character I live for that don’t appear in it - I love the floor of death arc SO MUCH cause for one, there’s nearly all my favorite characters in it, and also because it’s such a good, dynamic arc?? everything that happens is so much fun and interesting?? also Hockney is there, and Urek is there, and Garam is there, and the Hell Train gang is all there, so!! AH and the hell train as a whole is so damn good (the dallar show???? my whole soul rests in there, Khun’s trust in Bam!! the coin flip with rachel!! Bam’s whole everything!!!!!!!! GAH) but my fav part of it has to be the hidden floor?? because!!!!!! it’s perfect from start to end, everyone in it is wonderful, Bam’s growth in it!!! GODS! My favorite scene in the whole webtoon is in the hidden floor arc, it’s how much I love it - THEN THERE’S YAMA and the whole arc there is so so SO good too, and the latest arc!! how good is the latest arc!!!!!

so yeah I can’t pick - art wise I think it goes without saying that SIU’s art has only gotten better, so the closest to the newest update you go the more I like the art.... though, my favorite Bam is still the short haired one from the Hell Train arc haha

Anon said: Oh, wow, how stupid of me. Like 2 months ago, I sent you a message telling you how much I loved your work... and I didn’t see it on your page, or anywhere else. Finally today, I discovered I had an inbox where you answered me... 🤦‍♀️... I still love your work, by the way...

AHHH yeah I always answer off-anon asks privately! And thank you so much for still liking my things!!

Anon said: Have you read the last haikyuu chapter? How did you feel about it?

I’ve reread it at least twenty times and then I went and reread the whole of the last game again and it’s been three weeks and I’m still thinking about it more or less constantly and feeling giddy happy about everything that manga has ended up being, genuinely one of the best manga I’ve ever had the pleasure of following till the very end - that’s how I feel about it <3

Anon said: I really like looking at your art it’s so therapeutic it’s wonderful please keep drawing I want to support you on Kofi and patreon and yet I am broke please just know I love u very much ok bye

Ahhhh it’s okay anon! I try to keep as little completely unavailable for my followers as I can, and I’ll do my best to keep drawing! Can’t promise the fandoms will always be stuff you care about though haha

Anon said: This is my FAVORITE art blog. Is blog even a word that ppl use anymore?? Idk but anyways your kiribaku gives me life and cures my depression so ily and thank u

I’m so so happy to hear that! Thank you so much!!! TTATT <3

Anon said: just now realizing your oc looks like the human version of kamakiri

To be fair the only thing they have in common is the green mohawk, but I get where you’re coming from! I was very happy when Kamakiri’s official colors came out exactly cause he makes me think about my boy, after all xD my love for Kamakiri is definitely biased, in that sense haha

Anon said: Just wanted to let u know im very gay for ur oc giulia that is all thanks

Anon I��m gonna cry I’m so glad you like her!!!!!!!!!! She’s one of my oldest OCs out of that group, it’s always so thrilling to know people like her ;A; <3

Anon said: I really like how you draw kirishima’s hair

Thank you!!!!!!!!!!! I have a lot of fun with it, though it does mean it ends up being kinda off canon more often than not haha

Anon said: hi! just a random question but how’d you come up with your name?

Fran is my name! Erid comes from Eridan from homestuck! Art is what I try to do! And that’s the incredibly interesting story behind my screen name haha

Anon said: Heya, so i sent the ask about the person who i suspect either heavily referenced or traced your art (i sent another ask about this tho im not sure if it went through) anyway, it was posted by ****************** you'll know it when you see it i think

Ahhhhhh sorry for how long this took me to answer, I went to check and it’s!!! fine, I mean, would have preferred if they had credited but I don’t think it was completely traced so I don’t mind too much, I used to copy art of people I liked too back when I was first starting, after all haha

#fran answers #many chattering tonight #anyway yes please do go check blue lock out I assure everyone it's a cool af manga #long post #also spoilers for tog in one of the answers #i went off there hahaha

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inchandescence · 3 years

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To Anon

Question: Yeolmaes hate baekhyun mostly because his stans are the ones sending most hate to chanyeol and baekhyun never said anything about it, instead he kinda validated their feelings by not showing up to the box premiere, avoiding mentioning him at all costs and straight up saying he doesnt like musical movies Understand that yeolmaes have to deal with hundreds of hate messages written in Korean everyday and they are at a breaking point considering most of them come from bbh’s own fans How is it possible to like chanyeol and baekhyun at the same time in a situation like this? Do you even take chanyeol feelings into consideration? No? Not even once? He has to deal with thousands of nasty comments coming from bbh fanbase while bbh comes on Twitter reminding them how cute they are and how much he loves them If you cbkists choose to ignore this and baekhyun is actually in a relationship with Pcy it just means that you all couldn’t give less of a shit about chanyeol as a person with feelings and are just a bunch of selfish pricks

Answer: Anon...sighs you can't see something from one point of view only really, but it's okay i get you, ok so let us talk about this one by one: 1. You said: Yeolmaes hate baekhyun the most because his stans are the ones sending most hate to chanyeol and baekhyun never say anything about it -When you perceive the assumption that baekhyun stans hate chanyeol the most, did u believe it right or did u question it, like why its baekhyun stans, if its true then since when they started hating chanyeol, and why do they hate chanyeol, does their reason make sense or its just stupid like how other bbhls who hate other exo members too (for example some bbhls hate jd bcs both are main vocalists and they think jd is stealing bh's spot as a vocalist) -But at the same time, we cant find the exact number that would proof that bbhls are the ones who hate chanyeol the most, we only can see what twitter shows us, and it happened to me too that i see bbhls throw hate to chanyeol the most -But at the same time too, I've been seeing yeolmaes who throw hate at baekhyun too since years ago without me knowing the reason why they do that, and I keep questioning it everytime why yeolmaes suddenly started hating baekhyun so bad, when did it start -AND at the same time too, I've been seeing other exo member stans throwing hate to either baekhyun or chanyeol -But my twitter algorithm is the same as you anon, it shows that bbhls hate chanyeol the most and yeolmaes hate baekhyun the most, so I do often make the assumption that bbhls and yeolmaes are always on each other's throat -But yet again, I don't know who started hating the first time, is it bbhls, is it yeolmaes, and why they did that -This knowledge is unknown to me so based on this, to me the most right way is to think that both sides are wrong because hating is always the worse way to deal with things, the fact that we know is chanyeol and baekhyun are good friends they are always there for each other, usually when ppl see im saying this they will say its fake and its fan service, but people can choose to not see what they dont wanna see, so the easiest proofs to prove that chanyeol and baekhyun are good friends is one chanyeol is the only member in exo that baekhyun wished happy birthday on his instagram, two both of them support each other for candy and 1 billion views by coming to the mv bts, three baekhyun and chanyeol go to vocal lessons together, four chanyeol had taken a photo with all of baekhyun's bucheon friends before so in that photo baekhyun, chanyeol, and baekhyun's bucheon friends (istg if people see these as fan service then it doesnt make sense right?)

Before we go to the next thing, I have this assumption that chanyeol and baekhyun are two members that have the highest popularity in sk, either they are the top 3 or top 4, and my reason is bcs everytime there are individual album/photobook covers sold offline, their individual covers sold out the fastest, everytime, even with nature republic stuffs, ok so there's this possibility that we keep seeing yeolmaes and bbhls on each other's throat everytime bcs well both of them are two of the most popular exo members in SK (i mean even in china, chanyeol and baekhyun are the most popular members with sehun, there's data for this)

2. You said: Baekhyun never say anything about this, he kinda "validated their feelings by not showing up to the box premiere and voiding mentioning him at all costs and straight up saying he doesnt like musical movies"

-First of all, let's look at a bigger picture, is there any idol in the k-industry like ANY IDOL that ever said to their fans "guys don't say that to my member" IS THERE. ANY.? what I know is: there is none, none at all zero zip nothing, and if there's at least one or two idols, then its just one or two idols right -And thats it anon, thats just about it, idols dont have the absolute freedom of speech, they never do, and its hurting them all of them, all they can say is: "I love EXO, I miss EXO members the most, EXO is my home" and most solo stans who see that will just say "its bs" yet solo stans are also asking for proofs that the members relationship are fine -None of these kpop idols ever say anything about hate speech from their fans that are thrown to their friends/bandmates, and this kind of thing happens in every fandom anon, not just chanyeol and baekhyun, it's just how korean entertainment industry is, idols never have the ultimate freedom to say or do anything

3. Not showing up to the box premiere, avoiding mentioning him, saying he doesnt like musical movies -That not showing up to the box premiere really changed the way you think huh anon, yeah I think that event also changed many yeolmaes' perspectives sighs okay, not showing up to the box premiere is like a very open information we can easily see it from one tweet that didnt mention baekhyun name during that event -BUT for other cases "avoid mentioning him" and "saying he doesnt like musical movies" is not a very open information, by this i mean u have to read alllll of the things baekhyun say, look at the trans for all of his vlives/shows/etc, read the whole trans for baekhyun's last vlive before he goes to the military, so u or other yeolmaes after that situation are either trying to "search for baekhyun's act or words that deny fans opinion about how they hate each other" bcs u still "have hope in baekhyun" or "search for baekhyun's act or words that support my perspective about how he hates chanyeol and never defend cy from bbhls" -"Validate their feelings" how? once again, it's just what bbhls think, did baekhyun do and say all of that because well "his motive is to support bbhls that hate chanyeol" and who are you, who are we to say that, are we our bias? can we go inside their minds and goes aha! this is why they do this and that! well no. because once again thats the entertainment industry, the chances for idols to "explain" all of the bad situations esp when its about how their fans act, is very veryyy low, or like the chance is even minus

-We are just fans who watch them on cam, without knowing what's on their mind or what is everything they are going through behind the camera, we know nothing, all of our opinions are just perspective that our mind created that turned into assumptions, we could never know the truth because kpop industry prevents their artist from showing the truths that may "hurt" people, who actually deserve to be hurt, but those people are the "money makers" for the company, it's bad it's toxic it's awful that just bcs they have to "maintain the money makers" idols can never get that freedom -Same goes with baekhyun, gdi we dont know him, we really really dont know him, his mind, his motives and reasons for his actions, who are we to judge him and call him selfish? -But what we know is baekhyun helping to defend chanyeol when that fake rumor was spreading by tweeting the mosquito thing, what we know is baekhyun and chanyeol doing their choreo for DFTF together that was practiced since early 2021 until before they enlist, what we know is baekhyun saying chanyeol he's fine when fans asked on japanese fansign, what we know is them still doing vocal lessons together, going to vocal lesson tgt too on march after the box premiere (bcs chanyeol's hair was grey in the vlog) before they enlist, what we know is baekhyun loving and singing "tomorrow" tgt with chanyeol, so what we know is they keep spending time with each other as bandmates and friends

"do you ever take chanyeol's feeling into consideration, you all couldnt give less of a shit about chanyeol as person with feelings and are just a bunch of selfish pricks" 1. Baekhyun tweeting that mosquito tweet to defend chanyeol -Responses>> People went: oh he's just defending himself, he's being selfish once again, he doesnt care about chanyeol 2. Baekhyun answering fans question about chanyeol's condition -Responses>> No one translated this after few days OP has translated Original post Jan 29: https://twitter.com/tomo_exo/status/1355177834185064451?s=20 First ever translation on FEB 13 (AND FROM A CBKIST): https://twitter.com/NTH_2705/status/1360626904756228096?s=20 Also this cbkist isnt always active translating, I know her, she's not on Twitter as much as other trans account and she doesnt understand japanese, so she actually found the post on weibo and translated it from chinese thats why it was translated 2 weeks after, but before her? does ANY account translate this? well no. 3. Baekhyun and Chanyeol doing choreo in DFTF tgt -No BTS, no anything from SM, people who hate seeing them tgt can ignore easily, chanbaek stans can only watch the part over and over 4. Baekhyun and Chanyeol practicing their hitting the woah part in just usual mv -Again no one commented about this, except chanbaek stans bcs this is easily ignored 5. Lesson With Baekhyun -Responses>> yeolmaes went "chanyeol don't do this, chanyeol im not watching this, chanyeol what are you doing, i want chanyeol only, oh god why is chanyeol with him again, chanyeol is feeding chanbaekist, his fans (bbhls) gonna come at us again, fuck this im not watching" and bbhls went "the translation is wrong look theyre trying to sabotage bbh" and yeolmaes replied with "good for him haha, ya serves him right for being selfish" and also "why is it always chanyeol who does this kind of thing and never baekhyun? oh right because hes selfish hes sm golden boy he never gonna do this bcs his channel is own by SM" "look he promoted kyoongtube even in the nng" "look SM posted kyoongtube but not NNG u can see whos the mistreated one him"

All of those 5 things I mentioned, even tho some are small things....they got mostly negative responses from yeolmaes and bbhls who are not cbkist dont they? The things that prove chanyeol and baekhyun are always there for each other and they are bandmates, true friends, nothing change between them And yet, what did bbhls and yeolmaes do? Throw negative shits and comments to those things, esp Lesson With Baekhyun, and until now still hate Baekhyun... when Lesson With Baekhyun, is a vlog recorded by Chanyeol alone, he taped his phone in the car, he added Candy MV BTS with Baekhyun calling him "chanyeol ah" and baekhyun smiling while holding the food, a vlog where he praised baekhyun's vocals, prepared playlist for him, sing tomorrow together with him, laughing during their vocal lesson, and just...doing things tgt

And yet people still call it a fanservice? feeding chanbaekist? baekhyun is still selfish? when chanyeol worked hard preparing that vlog, providing it for us, baekhyun and chanyeol practicing their part tgt for DFTF, baekhyun tweeting the mosquito tweet

When Chanyeol and Baekhyun have done so many things together, after the fake rumor, after the box premiere, proving they are still good friends... so do you even take chanyeol's feelings into consideration? oh wait not just feelings, his efforts, his time, him uploading to NNG about him hanging out with Baekhyun, have you ever take that to consideration? or just ignore all those facts because "whatever i still hate baekhyun"

So two options: 1. Hating and keep hating and telling others selfish because yall hate the fact that baekhyun never do this and that, that yall wanted him to do, but actually we don't know the reason why, we just don't know anything at all, accept assumptions that "baekhyun validated fans feeling" and thats according to you, your mind, your perspective, oh wait... it's all about you? 2. Know and accept and support and love, chanyeol and baekhyun's friendship, because thats what we know, thats what themselves say to us, thats what themselves been doing, accepting the fact that "chanyeol and baekhyun are good friends" and know we are not in the position to turn the friendship into bad relationship bcs what? bcs it comes from chanyeol and baekhyun themselves, not yeolmaes, not bbhls, not even exols, and so be a fan that know chanyeol and baekhyun have good relationship, keep reporting bbhls who said bad things about cy and vice versa, bcs what? we never want chanyeol to see that after lesson with baekhyun, apparently his "fans" still think baekhyun, his best friend and bandmate, is still a selfish person who doesnt care about chanyeol, so chanyeol is happy that we know and appreciate his relationship with baekhyun, with exo members because we care about chanyeol's feelings, because we trust his actions, his words, and we love everything he does, and also we love everyone around chanyeol that he loves

So choose... and last thing, are social media and on cam interactions, are enough to "measure" a group of people's relationships, so if your best friend never post any picture of you on their instagram and never tell stories about you to other people who well, actually are also strangers, living thousand miles away from you and your best friend, then it's okay for those strangers to say that your best friend hates you? avoiding to be affiliated with you? a selfish person? Have people ever think that it's tiring that just because you're a celebrity, you have to show everything, including minds, feelings, emotions, actions, personal reasons, to your fans? For them to be validated? And for them to turn into facts? Well, at least for me, the things I don't know then I don't know, I don't have the right to judge, and the things I know, especially positive things, that came from my own idols, that's what I'm holding on, that's what I support. *extra note: exo members always call us as EXO-Ls, not bbhls, not yeolmaes, not anyone, but EXO-Ls, so when they say they love us, "loved ones" are those who say themselves are EXO-Ls, who loves EXO as 9 members, because that's the fact

Have a good day anon, stay safe and healthy, God bless you, spread love and not hate

#chanbaek #chanyeol #baekhyun #exo #kpop #baekyeol

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thisfckinsucks · 3 years

Text

would i be friends with these percy jackson characters in school (pretend most of them r the same age pls)

percy: no, bc i feel like i’d b like “i hate my mom” or say “i hate women” mockingly to a friend right after arguing with a bigot in history class abt equal rights and he’d overhear me and be like “u shouldnt say that :/ she probably worked very hard for u n women deserve to have the same rights as everyone else” and i’d stand there n b like homie ik i was making fun of the guy and i literally do not have a good relationship with my mom but he’d go on n on about it. i’d purposefully avoid him for like a week after until he forgets abt it

annabeth: i think i’d try and bite her and she’d try to bite me back during gym class, but we’d partner up in math bc she has a hard time with algebra, so i’d help her n she does the same for me in geometry. other than that we dont talk much but we do have each other on our private stories bc she thinks im funny and i think she tells weird stories and the tiktoks she posts on there are good

jason: yes, i’d follow him around during gym class, run the mile with him, and partner up with him in every group project. i’d never go to his house n he’d never come to mine though. everyday i’d probably walk over to his lunch table and give him something i bought from 7-11 and he’d give me his least favourite part of his lunch that i enjoy. i’d also text him like “hey what do we do for this project” n he’d say it was due 4 weeks ago but tell me what to do anyways

piper: no, but i’d admire her from afar. shed steal a car or get suspended for a few days, come back, and i’d b like “shes so cool i wish i was her friend”, but i’d never actually talk to her and everytime id go to jasons table shed be laughing at a joke leo said and i’d be like wow i love her outfit shes so cool and then go back to my table without saying anything to her lol

leo: yes, he’d be the annoying kid who moans in the back of class and i’d laugh every single time. we’d probably walk to and from lunch together and he’d say “watch me hit this door frame!” and i’d stand there and watch him hit it and then i’d b like “ok ok my turn watch me do a cartwheel!” and do it and we’d both laugh and get in trouble for being loud in the hallways

hazel: i feel like she’d be on the student council. i’d get put in the student council room for study hall bc my teachers thought i’d like it and i’d be like i literaly dont want to do this. she’d try and convince me to stay and join student council but i’d sit there like :| also i’d follow her on all social media platforms because i think shes nice and i think shes talented at drawing but i’d still be a little bit ticked off abt the student council thing

frank: tbh i wouldnt know he exists :/ i’d recognise him from when hazel tried to get me to join student council and i’d see him around, but we wouldnt have any classes together and i wouldnt know his name

nico: we would have the same study hall. i’d see him in the corner and think he looks cool and then id try to follow him around and he’d just let me. i’d talk ALOT and he’d just sit there and listen even though he has no clue what im saying. we’d eat lunch together because on this block he doesnt have lunch with will and he knows ill listen to him when he talks shit abt the ppl he doesnt like and i’d b like yea same we r like the same person n laugh and he’d smile and then ask abt what episode im watching on an anime we both like

reyna: no, bc i scribbled something on her paper once bc i thought it’d b funny if she came back to the desks to see squidward on her paper. she came back said what the hell and i was like lol :p and when we had to rate our deskmates she gave me a 4/10 for distracting everyone during work times and generally being annoying to her

thalia: yea, we’d bond over music taste and she’d take me to concerts. she probably gave me weed once and said to be careful with it. she’d act like a big sister to me and i’d cry at her graduation and make her promise to text me

grover: popular girls would call him their bestfriend but bully him behind his back. percy confronted them abt it once and i saw it n went damn im not going to touch that with a ten foot pole bc i think grovers nice plus he helps me in class but also hes percys bestfriend and i do Not want to step between those two

clarisse: we wouldnt be close friends, but i’d definitely get along with her. we’d probably hangout after school and just talk shit abt the ppl we dont like and i’d probably accidentally give her ideas for pranks

will solace: i definitely saw him while he was at a club n went wow hes pretty. i probably even had a little crush on him until one day at lunch when nico mentions his boyfriend will and im like wait a minute. from there on out i tease him and see him as a little brother tho

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seoafin · 3 years

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jjk & tower of god chapter on the same day,,, i spent all of my brainjuice talking abt tog w some friends + working on my wip so this one might be incoherent LMAO but nsjdhfjd this my 2 cents for the chp (1) - 🐱

first of all, the zenins shld just eat shit 🥰 the bar is just nonexistant now 😭😭😭

also maki’s mother said sth that hits way too close to home for me too🥴

the maki & mai, megumi & tsumiki "make a place where they are happy” parallels...mai,, maki wanted a place where u'd be happy!!! 😭😭😭 good points abt any interesting nuances the original jpn might have had though

ALSO MUSCLE MAKI IS HERE

and lmao megumi's "ew no" face ,,, i didn't think he could make a face like that JDJJDJD ,, once again i think his outsider-insider status is interesting but the amount of ppl counting on him/leaning on him bc of strategic position is a lot. ig this is what kamo meant by supporting the 3 families,,,, gojou indeed is playing the long game. megumi in the meantime, very persistent in not getting more involved in clan politics, not using power that is offered to him, or leveraging it - in a way it is good, and it also makes sense with "stress is other ppl" but is interesting from a structural pov. megumi may not rly give a shit abt the rest of the jujutsu world. if the ppl close to him are affected, then he cares. otherwise, forget it.

also im interested in power implications here bcs it sound a little like there’s a slight split b/w leadership and everyday zenins and im curious what it's like if u have no connection to the top of the clan,, and again higher ups being unaffiliated with the 3 clans so they have to appeal to them. curious what other talents the gojou clan have and what they're known for bc clearly it's not just gojou, they still have power without him and still have a stake in the shifting power structure. kamo must be busy too...

MAKIIIIII ,,, honestly my heart hurts a little seeing her getting beat up in recent chapters. but i’m rly happy,, shes FINALLY getting the focus she deserves and i’m confident she will make a recovery and she IS in fact the one leading efforts on the zenin side. im rly hopeful she can take over the clan one day and no longer say she's not good enough

that stomach wound is bad news though so im wondering how she will come back from that,, that she didn't know her own father's abilities says a lot, too. i wonder if she could see the extension of his blade, or if she hasn't been able to see/understand many ppl abilities

im hopeful for next chp now. u can do it maki!!!!

flashing back on these bits, it makes more sense now why megumi wasn't melting down post-shibuya,, seems most information came to him in a sort of timely and calm way? also i rly have to wonder if gojou did not spend a decade plotting in front him bcs he's done it before,,,, like the whole clan head scene in megumi's middle school years....in a way i imagine he wouldve seen that gojou come out of the high school and watch him get more serious as he acquired even more skin in the game

all the time though i wonder abt megumi's tendency toward inertia and nonaction to things that would seemingly give him power and trying to understand it and that IS him being selfish and that IS,, imo the biggest indication of what he actually does or doesn't want. he wants it, he will act and work on it immediately himself. he doesn't like it? act like it doesn't exist. it make me want to shake him around like NO!! megumi pay attention!!! But his reaction to this clan stuff is a contrast to his behavior in recent chapters imo

and more mahjong references,,, between this and yuuji’s pachinko,, i wonder abt the undercurrent of gambling haha. a gamble for the shaman world and who will come out on top? a contrast to the flowy ocean imagery that connects shaman stuff out to the rest of the world

also this ,,,, there's that one jp tweet (i cant find it again😞) that talks about how toji, as the point of distortion, created megumi, who is currently playing a potential convergence/healing/uniting role (if he actually takes it on as a responsibility lol) and connects this back to the medicine buddha,,, whose mudra (hand sign) is used for chimera shadow garden. with the commentary abt ppl with heavenly restriction needing to know what to throw away in order to become strong or tap into their full strength and toji’s commentary at the end of fight with gojou,, i actually always felt that toji died not having been entirely resolved with himself bc he talks abt going against the self that decided to forget abt self-respect, to live without thinking abt himself or others,,, in a way, living selfishly, for himself, by ignoring anything immediate and i think he succeeded for a while bc he didnt even remember megumi's name. he remembers it when he talks to getou abt him being thankful for toji not killing him bc of potential drawbacks

and at the very end he thinks of megumi again and that last act does think of someone else, like a "life before your eyes" moment where toji thinks about how the zenin's treatment of him led him there or how his return to shibuya ends with him remembering how he gave megumi back to the zenin,,, i think atm of his death he was starting to think he did want to care, in a different way, or that he needed a different paradigm. or,, maybe he was just starting to realize how far the zenin thinking had set into him

so we dont rly talk abt that being an enlightenment moment for toji but i kind of think it was. that megumi has the potential to become a pivotal piece as a legacy of distortion is interesting. i dont actually think toji set up everything intentionally bc he didnt know megumi's ability, and i dont think he wouldve thought that far. i think a lot of the heir and inheritance stuff is sth naobito set in after seeing megumi's development under gojou. it's clear now everyone has been keeping eyes on everyone else

at some point there's some interesting discussion to be had abt megumi and privilege - i'm surprised the canon characters dont hate him more for having stuff just fall into his lap, and so i liked that maki pointed this out that he could use this and he shld bc theres a frustration there - and yet at the same time megumi himself seemingly feels very little attachment to the zenin and the shaman world still. he just cares abt his little circle of people, and it's a very intentional choice, based on his good/bad ppl thing

u cant really affect the entire world, but u can assert urself on the environment around u and decide what u do and dont act on. this part of megumi is more teenage boy and kind of toji-like, i think,,, hence the emphasis on action

u express ur effect and existence through action, who u kill or who u save. toji having very little, while so much falls into megumi's lap while he doesn't want it, doesn't want to acknowledge it, likely doesn't want to take part in a system he doesn't like or, having been raised under gojou's wing, resents or finds corrupt or useless, or doesn't even think on bc he thinks its above his pay grade and gojou's there - this is also megumi's moment to solidify his own direction and commit to working in the system or out of it

the "not caring" is a defensive measure in a way too, i think. i dont think megumi is Big Good and wants to save everyone and everything and the world to be good and pure, i tend to think of him as a resigned chaotic neutral, who wishes he could be good orz

ANYWAY i think there's some interesting juxtapositions with the whole toji > megumi thing, that someone who is born without, restricted, births and creates someone full of blessings. its very shaman-like, action then reaction

AND i wish u luck on ur final paper (bless ur eyes to see incels bc i’ll just log off for the day when i saw one (1) of them on the net) AND DONT FORGET TO TAKE A REST,, the self care is much needed me thinks <333 (2) - 🐱

i love u 🥺🥺😭😭😭 you take care of yourself too!!!

also ur right...all this political intrigue im so curious i need to know how the jujutsu world is structured in terms of the higher ups and the clans. like i assumed that the three clan elders WERE to some extent also part of the higher ups???? but now it seems that the higher ups are a separate entity altogether, so like checks and balances i suppose. except both the higher ups and the clans are corrupt so no balance there 😭

the chapter implied the zenins are losing when it comes to the power struggle between the three clans. im interested. i want to see them all rot!!! like i also said though it’s going to be interesting to see the state of the kamo clan though, considering “noritoshi kamo.” like what do you even say to that???? im going to be surprised if it doesn’t affect their standing in the jujutsu world but then again the kamo clan IS one of the big three.

megumi really is a character that was blessed in all regards but like. doesn’t want anything to do with it LOL he really said ‘this is a pain no thanks.’ like gojo like megumi i suppose. i agree with u the whole toji and megumi set up....genius....i also love their juxtaposition. it’s so interesting and another source of irony.

#MAKI THOUGH......MAKIIIIIII #that stomach wound was worrying tbh at first i was like??? what is that panel even. but now.......ughhhhhh #🐱 anon

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badwolfwrites-sometimes · 4 years

Text

Drawn Together: Chapter 16

I may or may not have forgotten to post this chapter here for a while... Anyway, there are 5 references to other pieces of Hetalia work, see if you can get them all right.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/18923374/chapters/57211975

♡~Feli~♡: Ludwig

Ludwig: Yes?

♡~Feli~♡: Im sad

Ludwig: Why are you sad?

♡~Feli~♡: Mirror me is ugly ♡~Feli~♡: I have these dumb fat cheeks and this stupid baby face and this fat body ♡~Feli~♡: No matter how hard i try i cant lose them ♡~Feli~♡: Ill never be manly enough for girls to like me

Ludwig: Feliciano are you crying?

♡~Feli~♡: Ofc im crying ♡~Feli~♡: I just look so dumb no wonder ppl call me stupid

Ludwig: Okay, take a deep breath Ludwig: You only look ugly to yourself because you are crying Ludwig: You aren't dumb and you aren't ugly Ludwig: And I am pretty sure there are some girls out there that will like you Ludwig: Have you eaten anything today?

♡~Feli~♡: No ♡~Feli~♡: Im already fat enough i dont deserve more food

Ludwig: Feliciano Ludwig: Losing weight isn't about not eating at all Ludwig: Not that you have any to lose, you look perfectly fit in your pictures Ludwig: Once you stop crying go eat something Ludwig: You will feel much better

♡~Feli~♡: But ill still be fat and ill still have this stupid baby face

Ludwig: They are alright Feliciano Ludwig: They are barely noticable Ludwig: Now will you please go eat something

♡~Feli~♡: Okay

Ludwig: Good Ludwig: I am worried about you, do you think we could have another video call?

♡~Feli~♡: Let me dry my tears first

Feliciano took his time calming down. He made himself some tea and grabbed the leftover pizza from the fridge. Today, he was alone in the house, a feeling that worsened his melancholy. There was no one to hold him and cuddle him and tell him that things are okay. There was no one to yell at him and tell him to pull himself together and do something useful in life before whispering to him that he's beautiful. Feliciano craved those moments today.

He didn't even warm up his pizza before eating it like it was straight out of a famous Italian restaurant. His tea left forgotten as he dined, only the soft smell of cinnamon strong enough to calm his nerves down. It wasn't the time to be depressed, he had Ludwig to talk to. Finishing off his pizza, he grabbed his tea and retreated to his room, turning on Skype.

♡~Feli~♡: Okay im calm you can skype me now

Ludwig: Alright, let me just turn on my laptop

A few minutes later, Feliciano got the Skype notification on his computer. Accepting the call, he was met with the usual Ludwig business, bringing a smile to his face.

Ludwig was dressed properly, nothing too fancy, but also not in pajamas like Feliciano was. His hair was neatly slicked back and his room as tidy as always. Same couldn't be said about Feliciano.

On top of wearing pj's all day everyday, Feliciano was tightly wrapped up in a thick blanket like it was in the middle of winter and not plain old May. His eyes were still noticeably red and puffy, but Ludwig wouldn't comment on that even if it killed him. To add to the sad wintery atmosphere Feliciano had going on, between his hands, he was cuddling a colorful cup covered in stars.

Said cup was the first thing Feliciano noticed Ludwig was staring at. "Do you like it? I made it myself when I was a kid." He smiled.

Ludwig nodded, clearing his throat. "Yes. It really fits you, I must admit."

Feliciano giggled, feeling a bit of a sting from his eyes. He will probably have a headache in the morning.

"Are you feeling better?" Ludwig continued. "Did you eat anything?"

Feliciano nodded. "I had some leftover pizza so I ate that. And now I'm drinking tea to feel good about myself."

"Good. That is good."

"I guess."

"Do you feel better now that you had something to eat?" Ludwig asked, his concern for Feliciano noticeable in his voice.

"Yeah, I think. Sorry I worried you like that."

"Don't be. If anything, I am glad that you spoke to me about it. I know how you feel. I was a chubby kid too."

"How did you lose weight?"

"I didn't. Growing up, my weight just transferred into muscles and I trained for a while. None of it went away."

"Well, that's comforting." Feliciano sighed sadly. "I can't keep a training schedule to save my life. Especially now that I am out of school and do nothing all day."

"You just need something to push you to do it." Ludwig said. "How about a dare?"

"A dare? Are we playing truth or dare?"

"We can if you want to."

"Okay. What's your dare?"

"I dare you to do 3 pushups every day for the next month."

Feliciano nearly spat out some of the tea he was drinking. "Three?! I can barely do 1!"

"It is a dare, you have to do it." Ludwig almost smirked.

"Only if you do something as well."

Ludwig was about to start regretting his decision. "What is it?"

Feliciano thought hard for a while, before coming up with a challenge long and hard enough for Ludwig to do it. "You told me once you weren't much of an artist."

"Yes." Ludwig was definitely regretting playing this game.

"I want you to paint me a picture of what made you happy that day. Every day. For the next month." Feliciano smirked.

"Does it have to be a painting?" Ludwig meekly asked. "You know how busy my schedule is."

"No, but it has to be colorful. And I want them sent to me by 11 p.m. ever day."

"You really like challenges, don't you?"

"You dared me first. Now you have to do it too."

"Fine." Ludwig relaxed in his chair. "It is my turn I believe." He took his time thinking about the perfect question. "If you could only see one color for the rest of your life, which one would it be?"

Taken a bit by surprise, Feliciano thought for a while, looking around to spot a color which stood out the most to him. The sea was calm today, that got his attention, so calm it was almost calling for him, so, so very... "Blue." He said out loud, without realizing it.

"Somehow that doesn't surprise me." Ludwig's voice pulled Feliciano out of his trance. "I would like to see brown mostly."

Feliciano's face almost twisted at the word brown. Why brown? It doesn't even stand out that much in nature, it's just darker orange and an ugly mix of colors together. "Why?"

Ludwig smiled. "My dogs are mostly brown." Well that explained a lot.

"I should have expected that." Feliciano laughed. "My turn. Have you ever had a girlfriend?"

An awkward question to ask Ludwig, Feliciano noticed. His cheeks have gotten a shade or two darker than usual, something that would probably go unnoticeable if he wasn't so pale. Regardless, Feliciano just had to know.

Ludwig breathed in. "No. I don't even have a female friend that isn't family to me."

"You've never dated?" Feliciano asked in surprise. And Ludwig was so good looking?

Ludwig shook his head, slightly embarrassed. "I get it that I haven't, but you? Look," Feliciano started, "when I come to Germany, we'll go hunting for ladies so that neither of us are single ever again, okay?"

It was no use in arguing over girls with Feliciano, so Ludwig just gave in. "Why are you so obsessed with them anyway?"

"Is that the next question?" Feliciano asked.

"Yes."

Feliciano thought for a bit. "I think it's because I have multiple personalities living inside of me." He pointed to his chest. "One is your regular flirty Italian, the other is a sad bastard and the third one is just a huge lesbian."

Ludwig laughed, but Feliciano continued. "I think we all have a female part inside of us, mine just happens to like girls more than normal."

"Okay, if you say so." Ludwig still had to recover from his laughing fit.

"Also, lately I've been having these strange dreams. Like, one time I dreamed I was stuck in a dreamworld and it was all really beautiful and nice, but I would die if I stayed for too long. And you were coming to save me." Feliciano rambled. "Would you come save me from the dreamworld, Ludwig?"

"Of course I would." Truth to be told, Ludwig wasn't following Feliciano much.

"Aw, thank you. Anyway, that's not even the weirdest. I dreamed about this guy Steve one time, only he wasn't actually a guy but some alien creature. And he had this big mansion and I was stuck in there and I couldn't escape and it was so horrifying." Feliciano shivered at the memory of his dream.

"I must admit that it does sound horrifying. Especially if you happen to be claustrophobic." Ludwig said. "Now that you mention it, I've been having some strange dreams as well. And for some reason, you are always in them."

That peaked Feliciano's interest. Not that he wasn't interested in the first place. "Oh, I wanna hear! I wanna hear!"

"Well, one time I was a pilot during World War 2 and I was stationed in Italy and I met you, but then something happened and I had to leave. My plane crashed and I was imprisoned and you came to save me, then..." Ludwig stopped. "I don't recall what happened next, but it ended nicely, I think. I just remember flying a Messerschmitt Bf 109."

"Mrs. What?" Feliciano asked.

"Messerschmitt. It was a German fighter plane in World War 2. It was a rival plane to Spitfire and had a yellow nose."

Feliciano laughed. "I'll forget it's name, but at least I'll know it had a yellow nose."

"That is all you need to know." Ludwig continued. "Then I had another dream and it was poker themed. I was the king of hearts and you were my queen. That is pretty much all I remember from it."

"You must think so highly of me to make me your queen, I'm flattered." Feliciano giggled. "What do you think these dreams mean?"

"No idea, but I wish I knew. Maybe, they represent our bond with each other as friends."

"Maybe. Maybe they are telling us of our past lives and all that. Like your war one."

"I want to stop you because if you start talking like that, we will never leave the topic of dreams."

Feliciano laughed, glad that Ludwig was listening to him by stopping him from going too far with his talking. "When will you come to Italy, Ludwig? We could have so much fun."

"As soon as I have some more free time, I will pay you a visit."

"Yes! We can go on tour of Rome and I could show you the Colosseum and The Pantheon and Bocca della Verita and I could show you our beaches and we would have so much fun!"

"You sound like you have already planned everything out."

"That's just one possibility. I could give you a tour of all of Italy if you want. You just have to come here first."

Ludwig attempted his nicest smile. And failed. Feliciano was so excited about all of this. "Would you show me the Rialto Bridge as well?"

It would be a lie to say Feliciano's eyes didn't glow at this point. "Of course I would! And maybe you can bring your girlfriend, if you get one in time, and you can do the kiss scene from the book! You can even get married! Can I be your best man, please?"

"You will have to fight Gilbert for that position. I doubt he would just give it away."

"Gilbert, you are a worthy opponent. But I must take you down for the sake of providing myself the glorious Best Man position." Feliciano delivered the speech. "I can do best wedding speeches, I think Gilbert is already losing."

"We will see." Ludwig laughed. "But wouldn't you want to be your brother's best man?"

"I'm the odd one out, they got each other. Aside from you, I don't have much options on who else to have as my best man." Feliciano sighed.

"Well, that is really sad. I probably won't marry at all, so if you get married, I can still be your best man." Ludwig said.

"Really? You'd do that for me?"

"Yes."

"But what about Gilbert?"

"I admire you for believing that he would get married, but I doubt that would be the case."

"Harsh truth." Feliciano laughed. "I hope Lovi can get married. If not here, he could get married somewhere else."

"One day it might be possible."

"One day when the world isn't as hateful as now. I think he'll hate having to be married outside of Italy."

Silence fell upon them, just as the front door of Feliciano's house slammed shut. A soft, but loud voice could be heard. "Feli! I'm home!"

"Romeo is home. I'm not alone anymore." Feliciano commented.

"Do I suddenly not exist?" Ludwig asked, a bit offended by Feliciano's statement.

"No! I meant that I'm not home alone anymore. Don't go anywhere, I'd be sad if you stopped existing." Feliciano corrected himself.

A sound of footsteps coming up the stairs could be heard, but Feliciano failed to hear them.

"I won't be going anywhere then." Ludwig said, just as the door to Feliciano's room opened.

"Hi Feli." Romeo greeted. "Who are you talking to?"

Feliciano jumped slightly as the door opened, but smiled to his brother. "Ludwig. Come say hi."

Romeo did as he was told and greeted Ludwig. "Hi Lud."

"Hello." Came a response.

"Feli, nonno said he'll be coming home the day after tomorrow. We should probably prepare Lovi just in case." Romeo said.

"Good idea. I'll be down when we're done and we can plan the thing out." Feliciano responded and Romeo left him to wrap things up with Ludwig.

"So nonno is coming home soon. Which is bad. And we need to prepare Lovi for it. Which is worse." Feliciano explained the situation to Ludwig, seeing as the latter didn't know much Italian.

"I see. Basically, you get to be a pigeon again." Ludwig remarked.

Feliciano laughed, partially glad Ludwig still remembered that from a couple of months ago. "Probably. Maybe it works out okay in the end, but I doubt it."

"I am here whenever you need me. Except when I am at college or at work, but other than that..."

"Thanks." Feliciano laughed. "I gotta go. Me and Romeo have to plan this out carefully."

"Before you do, it is Romeo and I. Remember it."

"Yes, yes, Romeo and I, okay. Talk to you later, Ludwig!" Feliciano said, waving goodbye to Ludwig.

"Good luck!" Ludwig simply said and gave Feliciano a small wave before ending the call. They talked for good 3 hours, but to Feliciano it only felt like a couple of minutes.

He walked downstairs to discuss things with Romeo. Getting his brother and grandfather in the same room again won't be easy and Feliciano just hoped it would turn out okay in the end.

#GerIta #Germany x Italy #APH Germany #hetalia GerIta #gerita fanfic #aph gerita #hws gerita #APH Italy #aph seborga #hws germany #hws italy #hws seborga #APH #hws #hetalia #hetalia axis powers #hetalia world stars #drawn together story

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maribelsawyer · 5 years

Text

- ̗̀ * ( ella purnell + cisfemale + she/her ) have you seen ( maribel sawyer ) walking around campus ? they are a ( nineteen ) year old, studying ( journalism ). we hear they are in ( delta gamma chi ), and can be ( benevolent & impressionable ), maybe it’s because they are a ( gemini ). they sort of remind us of ( scraped knees , magnifying glasses , vintage oxfords ), maybe we can find out more ! * ̖́- + newspaper writer

god okay looks like i’ve fallen in love w ella purnell and i want to b her. anyways maribel is my newest baby n im sorta making her up as i go so pls bare w me lmao

TW: eating disorder mentions, subtle abuse?

{she is not currently in that mindset ^}

gen. info

full name: maribel ottoline sawyer

nickname(s): mari, bell, lottie b/c middle name, etc. etc. just sawyer sometimes idk

b.o.d. - june 1st, 19 yrs old

label(s): the marionette, the demure, the prevaricator, etc. etc.

height: like 5′3″ prolly tbh

hometown: duluth, minnesota

sexuality: shit she don’t know

bio. info

her dad’s in the air force, her mom’s published three diet cookbooks and two different DVDs--maribel is the only middle child

one of those conservative, all american families, they were strict and definitely made it known that they were parents and not friends by any means

9pm curfew, not leaving the dining room until all ur food is gone, grounded if ur grades were below their expectations, etc. etc.

her older sister can evoke emotions in others thru her acting like no other. has taken the hearts (and leads) of all her acting directors since childhood. her voice is broadway material.

and her older brother? has been the best linebacker on any high school team he’s joined; hopes to make it to the big leagues. but if he doesn’t? he’s been taking college-level classes since he was a sophomore.

and...maribel?

maribel is...just, maribel.

for the longest time, there was nothing special about maribel

she couldn’t sing, or dance, or compose words in pretty prose

her grades were only satisfactory after hrs n hrs of studying everyday

homegirl can’t even cook w/o smth exploding

in short, maribel has never been good at anything. can’t draw within the lines, can’t follow the line, opens her mouth at the wrong time. etc. etc. shit? rough.

ANYWAYS

her family moves around a lot b/c of her dad, so she’s never really been in one place long enough to really prove herself? always been the quiet girl in class while her siblings brought home gold stars everyday

the kinda girl others would sorta push around n bully a lil bit bc she would never know what to say; prolly just cried a lot tbh

grew up w a lot of insecurities b/c of this

definitely doesnt help that her mother is obsessed w beauty n fitness n like

their mother p much forced her lifestyle onto her children, mari has a rough relationship w food b/c of it

ANYWAYS part 2

grew up always in the shadows of her siblings and their accomplishments, and spent a lot of her time tryn find something to be good at just so somebody could give her a stamp of approval

was always the ~wannabe~, the girl who would just endlessly suck up to the most popular girl she could find and try to mimic her to the best of mari’s abilities, just so she could survive her school experience

by the time mari was a freshmen in high school, her parents had divorced and she finally thought she could have a normal school experience and make something for herself

obv not. her mother shipped her off to a boarding school in nevada and that was it; her sister had already graduated and her brother was still in middle school.

it was finally just mari.

of course like she tried to suck up to others but it wasn’t really helpful, everybody was a lil too boujie for her and she always froze up when she tried to speak to the ~popular kids~

they only rly spoke to her b/c she’s got this knack for forging shit, like i dont think she even has her own handwriting; she always copies other people’S b/c she’s just. so used to tryn to mimic others n be them as much as possible

around this time she found herself fucking around in her computer class more often than not; it’d been the only elective left b/c she arrived in the middle of the year

but she surprisingly enjoyed it, like, a lot

her parents never really allowed much computer use b/c like. rots ur brain or whatever.

got into programming, but when she found out that u could ? hack shit ? kinda peaked her interest.

her shift into programming to hacking was subtle but before she knew it, she was fucking around on websites for the fun of it. never anything severe

computers became her friends, y’know

that was until her sophomore year and there was another loser fucking around on the computers during lunchtime

and like...they just started kinda talking, y’know? became friends, prolly mari’s first legitimate friend in...forever, really

the kid was kinda weird but she didn’t mind b/c fuck, mari couldn’t be picky n she didn’t mind weird

like...they were obsessed w conspiracies n mysteries n shit

it started to rub off on mari too, b/c homegirl is an idiot but. an observant idiot.

so she started getting reeeally into mysteries and shit. started acting like a mini investigator w/ her pal; solving stupid things like ‘who wrote ‘mindy is a whore’ in the bathroom stall’ and ‘does mr. roberts have a secret obsession w kpop’

no mindy is not a whore it was slander

yes mr. roberts is into kpop

ANYWAYS part 3

so they were these nancy drew, scooby doo, veronica mars knock off duo

by junior yr her partner started getting into like. drinking and minor drugs and other things that the other boarding school kids were smuggling in, y’know.

this meant that mari was getting into that shit too, y’know. cant stay innocent forever.

became a lil bit of a pothead lmao

so like now theyre just stoners who go around solving shit and prolly also stirring shit up for the hell of it

so like . . . . . one night they were doin’ their thing, right? and her partner brings up this...completely wild idea

they live in nevada. y’kno what else is in nevada?

area 51

these fucking idiots want to go break into this fucking. air force base. to find area 51.

guess what they did?

they attempted to break into the air force base. like. of course they tried.

they failed like, super miserably, got arrested for trespassing and had to be bailed out of the county jail by their parents

her dad almost lost his job so he was mcfuckin PISSED esp once they figured out she was high as shit

her partner? disappeared. nobody knows where they went.

mari was moved from the boarding school to a public school closer to where her mother could, begrudgingly, keep an eye on her

kinda spent the rest of her high school career p miserable, she gave up on her whole ~detective~ thing and resorted to making fake IDs for her fellow high schoolers

was drug-tested like every week or so, too

around this time her mental health and relationship w food got worse, she barely made it to graduation. took a gap year to recover, worked a buncha jobs but usually gets fired from them b/c she’s really fucking bad like most things besides her two (2) unconventional talents that are decidedly useless

came to ucla b/c her mother p much made her, her mother’s a legacy and that’s about the only reason why she got into delta gamma chi

doesn’t want ppl to know she was a loser and also like . fucked up her dad’s life a lil, b/c it was def a thing that made the news and the only reason why her name wasn’t in the articles was b/c she was a minor at the time

so she like...lies abt her childhood a lot

tells a lotta lil white lies b/c she just. doesn’t wanna b her

uuuhh wanted to do computer science bc she loves it but her parents were both like ‘lmao we’re not paying for shit if u do that’ bc they don’t think it’s very ~ladylike~ n they still want her to like. just be submissive and obedient n shit.

so she took up journalism b/c neither her parents think it’s like a real career and they just want her to find a husband n get married n settle down n stop being troublesome

fun fact: she has a scholarship for being lefthanded so that pays for Some of it esp b/c she’s an out of state student

still struggles a lil bit w food but she’s like. doing a lot better. goes to group therapy, probably

uuuh that’s it for now i think ??

OH SIKE !! she’s a writer for the newspaper and writes ADVICE columns on various topics b/c she’s good at offering advice but only when she can sit down n think abt it lmao

^^she goes by an alias b/c she just. doesnt want ppl to know its her idk she thinks its embarrassing

other than that she’s probably like ... doing campus tech support b/c that’s her current job but who knows how long that’ll last lmao

knowing her she’s going to accidentally switch into her phone sex voice (another, old job she doesn’t do anymore) n get fired for tryn seduce a man with ‘did u try turning it on and off again?’

OKAY i think that’s all lmao

personality

mari is just. awkward, man

i mean like...she’s sorta bad at talking to others a lot of the time??

like ppl r kinda like ‘how tf r u a delta gamma chi girl’ n she’s just like i mean u h h h h

prolly stutters a lil bit b/c she’s usually rly anxious

but she’s v v nice, like, she tries her hardest to be a good friend n everything

but she also kinda switches her personality to appeal to whoever she’s talking too ?? like she wants to be. likable. she’s not real w/ others v v often

if ur boujie yeah she’ll pretend to be boujie too

she prolly still sells fake IDs to high schoolers n some of her college peers, she has one herself n hasn’t gotten caught yet sooo

always fidgets like she can’t rly sit still often b/c she’s so nervous

is a lil bit of a stoner but i feel like u can’t ever tell tbh

a lil shy n hesitant at first i’d imagine, or maybe just always lmao

has a bit more of a personality once she sucks it up n gets closer to u but she’s always v v cautious abt befriending ppl just b/c she’s had a bad time w bullies n her one friend in life disappeared so like...bummer, y’kno?

can never say no. like, i dont think it’s in her vocabulary. she’s a yes gal.

will p much do anything u ask of her b/c she’s constantly seeking approval

can ramble a bit when she’s nervous which is always but she also apologizes like a lot.

squeaks like a mouse

present at parties but it’s always kinda like. who r u. n she has to remind everybody that she’s a sorority gal too

considers herself v v forgettable, like, just v unimportant

like she’s just rly insecure

still does computer shit n is still rly good at it but she hasn’t done anything srs w/ it so it’s just wasted potential

going to use her journalism degree to do investigative journalism and maybe escape her parents, eventually

she just. bends easily to other’s wills, y’know? she’s hashtag soft

even tho she’s like. shy n awkward n shit it doesn’t take a lot for her to like, laugh, or smile

like she tries rly hard to appear happy n an optimist n just like. unfettered

a lil plain jane we stan

i cant think of anything else but she’s. she’s a good kid

OH she’s rly good w numbers n math but like that’s abt it. she’s a whole dumbass on everything else sometimes

is bad w talking n giving advice like in person but like ?? in her column or ovr text or smth ? she’s good. she’s concise.

is a good team player/good w/ projects/etc. etc.

OH OKAY YEAH

she’s rly observant n b/c she’s a lil bit of a compulsive liar she can usually tell when ppl arent honest

depending on how close y’all r she’ll prolly crack down on ur bullshit

but she’s also timid so like who knows tbh

this isn’t a personality trait but she wears like medium hoop earrings all the time n it’s cute ok bye

OK OK LAST THING

she’s so. fucking. clumsy. she will bump into everything. she’ll bump into the air. fuck, she prolly falls over just standing straight. usually has bruises n scratches from just being a clumsy idiot

like she can b a lil ditzy y’know ?? doesn’t have much common sense, sometimes, n can b naive but idk it’s all rly dependent on her n who she’s w n just. how i end up playing her lmao

lovs vintage. is cute.

wanted connections

her roommate uwu

ppl she’s interacted w/ during her childhood !! she’s moved around a lot so like . . . . they could kno each other

mmm sorority sisters

um gimme a ride or die or like a best friend or smth PLS she needs more friends

just more friends in general. she’s awkward but she needs ‘em

?? a one night stand ?? she’s not really . . . known for hooking up w/ ppl but i think an accidental occurrence would b fun!

idk somebody for her to just. crush on from afar. prolly stutters whenever they come near or talk to her or smth

^^i mean like an unrequited crush

SOMEBODY USE HER ! RUIN HER !

FRIENDS OR FUCKING OR WHATEVER

fake friends too! use her for her ~kewl skillz~

bad influence

let her b a good influence

some kinda...skinny love idk what that means. a will they wont they. smth cute. smth pure

it’d be wild if her partner just popped up outta the blue like that b/c mari 100% thinks they were like killed by the government

ppl she gets high w n talk abt conspiracies w/ tbh

ppl she gives or has given advice to w her column pieces ! love it

idk partners in a class

enemies or smth. i want conflict.

a tutor for her dumbass

but also anybody who needs help in math? she can tutor u

idk like this we can work a lil smth smth out

i give u one penny, if u plot w me. pls. i am poor.

#uclas:intro #like if u'd like to plot w her !!#pls give her love i think i love her

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joonslesbian-remade · 6 years

Note

i want to get to know you better! when you get this post 10 random facts about yourself and pass it on to 10 lovely people you want to know better too!

!!!! ilu !!!! tysm for sending me this :(( i read ur list too it was rly cool to find those things out abt u !!!

1. i try to draw everyday ! i’m alright at objects and stuff but i rly want to get better at drawing ppl and find my own style so every night i draw 3 a5 faces from the top of my head !

2. i’m also learning japanese bc i’m going there next summer as by 18th birthday present ! im using duolingo at the moment but it’s quite a short course so i’m gonna have to move to smth else in a couple motnhs uwu

3. i’m hopefully getting my hair dyed a peachy colour in a week or so !

4. i love making playlists on spotify ! i have around 15 set up at the moment for different moods and events and im still going through a massive playlist i made last yr to try and sort that out into these other playlists ! i also rly want to start making playlists that remind me of ppl and characters !

5. for the bts concert in october i’m thinking of making my own design and putting it on a shirt on redbubble and making it a private design so only i have it uwu,,,, i can then also make it rly cheap it’s great,,, it’ll probably be smth to do with agust d !

6. even tho my aesthetic is dark and edgy on here im actually in love with everything cute ! this is just the type of blog i always look up to so i thought id start being that blog uwu,,,, i used to have a massive collection of those animal rubbers that u can take apart And my favourite colour is actually pastel pink hehe

7. i have a pet hedgehog ! his name is gerald and even tho im still kinda scared to pick him up without a ‘blanket’ bc his spines are v spiky dont let that fool u ! i love him with my entire heart and hearing the pitter patter of his feet on his wheel at night makes my heart go boom

8. i saw hamilton on saturday ! it was Amazing and i nearly cried at wait for it bc it’s my favourite song from the soundtrack ! (i also nearly cried at it’s quiet uptown but thats more valid),,, im so happy caits mum managed to get us tickets !

9. hehe time to brag but i used to be so good at academic stuff ! in my gcses i got all As and above, and i even got a 9 (which is the highest grade in some new grading system they tested out on my yr idk) in maths and english lit !!! i was so in love with maths (but no ones allowed to know that) that i also got an A* in further maths hehehe,,,, in fact,, i got A*s or over in everything except the three sciences where i got As but like,,,, that was good in itself im not gonna say i wish i got higher fdsgdhfkl

10. i’m also a big ol’ dumbass !! i read recently that sagi suns are smart but lack common sense and i was like ‘finally ! an explanation for why im like this uwu’ i ask the most Stupid questions to my friends sometimes and get confused by rly easy social concepts ghfgkl

#i wish it was 11 facts #i was gonna put in how im trying to learn more abt astrology but..#i saw in urs that u rly like astrology so maybe u could teach me a bit abt it ??? only if u want to tho !!!!!#also i Probably wont pass this on bc i dont know who finds this spammy but i love getting them !!!#heejinluvr #answered

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woozi · 3 years

Note

twt being no.1 on updates, true that <3

not jaebeom speaking abt the mark, hui, btob youngjae fight on youngk's radio show at the time i was typing away abt temper 😭 dhdjdkkdks it's so funny whenever these guys meet someone has to mention abt it and then everyone starts talking. it's like that one story in your friend group you all just can't let go of and some might be like ' how long are you gonna talk abt it?' & next thing you know they're also talking about it at some other time djdjsksk. (but also not him saying he hugged mk to stop him 😔🥺 this was new info to me) i get what you're trying to say hdjdke <33.

oh no alexa pls play you can't sit with us by sunmi. sorry jaebs you are not allowed in our club anymore </3 dhdjdk. RIGHT?? need some silly things to hang on to, to make life interesting jdjdkdkd. naur <///3 i love yugs' smile and laugh sm. i like calling him, chan and seungkwan(even tho sometimes this one makes me want to fight him) ' babu ' (it's a cute term of endearment in my language djjdd idk how to describe it in eng it's something btwn bub and cutie but tbh comparing it to these two makes it a lil bland djdjdk also i feel like sharing this will give away my identity bc i use these a lot in tags 😭😭 also idk if you got the notif but i accidentally liked & then unliked last ask jdjdkd) anyway all 3 of them make me very happy 🥺.

im starting to l*ve u and ur taste too 😿💗. i'll be honest i don't know which bsides have choreo from old albums ( i only know of current ones bc i was there during cbs djdjk 😭) unless someone tells me abt it, i haven't seen it yet but that's what i'm gonna do after sending this. also samee i dont wanna get my hopes up but since jus2 are basically from same agency i am also looking forward to them being in one track in future.

gotsvt chef's kiss 💖. i think ppl just start naming songs they personally dislike, flop these days djjdke. maybe it's just younger ones or just those who listen to title tracks only. there used to be this one song i listened to, of jamie, it was also a feature can't remember name of it, but other than that i haven't listened to her discography much :3. tasteee it's a banger! on the rocks makes me want to miss my non existent s/o djekdkdl. the lyrics </3 the vibe </3. i think drive you home comes close to it for me. after on the rocks that's another one i love with capital L.

dhdjkdjdek that's okay i tend to repeat same phrases too, and trueeeee live performances hit differently.

it's funny how you say i'm keeping up w g7 bc i have no idea where jackson is or what he is doing and until his 2nd bday live i thought mark was in china but then got to know he was in hawaii 😭 i've given up on keeping track what they're doing off stage/irl unless i get update via ig stories through them. keeping up what their releases is still somewhat easy so i'm just doing that. ( i had no idea jaebs was gonna be on eric nam interview but finally today i got the chance to watch it 🥺💚) also!! yes i had didn't know what or how bam's agency is like but everything abt bam's cb i was content with and loved it, i'm impressed.

omg you're chan's age??? i'm a 97 kid :3 and yeah same that's what i thought too, couldn't really find any answer as to why he wasn't :/.

also no worries abt playlist jdjddk i'll slowly start listening to their discography here and there. BUT ALSO i saw there is slchld on the playlist you linked, I LOVE THEIR SONGS OMG. NO IDEA WHO THEY ARE BUT I LOVE LOVE LISTENING TO THEIR SONGS, yerin baek too!! after woozi's cover i started listening to some of her songs <333 also kehlani 💖 i love her voice. thank you for sending in just that too <3

also did you notice seungkwan's ball which got stuck om roof, is still there in same place in 4th ep of in the soop djsjskslsl 😭 i found that so funny for some reason. no one bothered to bring it down.

i hope this week is being kinder to you since last weekend was one rough (else i'm fighting it), stay hydrated <3 yza 💗 goodluck w uni - 🪂

WAIT HE DID????????????? I DIDNT GET TO WATCH THE THING THATS SO FUNNY 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

literally how many times have they talked abt this... AND EXACTLY FDJKFJDKFD it's the predebut fight bond for me <3 ok but i can see jaebs hugging mark so he won't beat the living shit out of the other boys that is So Him 😭

YOU LISTEN TO SUNMI... EVERYDAY U GET SEXIER.. WHAT THE HEAL.. it's like that w astrology to me too KJKJDFKJFDKJ i would also fight seungkwan no hesitation tbh it'd end up w me headlocking him im just so sure of it <3 OHHH I THINK IM FAMILIAR W UR NATIVE LANGUAGE THEN??? filo???? im not so sure though fdkjfdjkf and no u don't have to worry abt that i don't check my notifs anymore JKFKJJKDFKJ i just check mentions replies and asks <3 i know i'm missing a lot by doing so but it just takes up too much time for me now :/ and i will pretend to not know even though i have def seen those tags KJFKJDJKFDKJFD

dw i don't know most of them either KJFJKJFDD i just come across things!! i don't even know A Lot of things abt the groups i liked ever since i came back from my kpop hiatus jkfdkjdf i dont feel like i need to know Everything anymore just to like things lol 😭 im hanging on to this frail hope... jus2.. BLEASE....

ik :/ and there's no reasonable.. idk guideline anymore for "successful" songs which is also weird to me.. i think thats bc of streaming and shit :/ JAMIE IS SOOOO GOOOD!! i knew her from her reality competition days and when she eventually debuted in 15&. jype fucking sucks though she could've been v big now :/ the vocal chords on that woman.. incredible. <3 JDSKJDSJ WITH A CAPITAL L!!!! jacks' latest songs are always abt heartache what is he going thru 😭 how did u feel abt LMLY?

i know like.. only 13 words max nowadays so 😭

i think jacks is just always busy so we both cant keep up with him 😭 AND MARK IS IN HAWAII?????????? I THOUGHT HE WAS IN LA WTF 😭 i actually am not keeping up w them as much as i used to i just still have a lot of g7 moots and i follow update blogs so JKFJKDKJFD i still love the boys sm though it's just that im becoming a svtpoppie now 😭😭😭

yes i am <3 he's just a few months older than me!! ALSO WAIT we're the same age as g7 and svt's maknae lines 👁️👄👁️

HELL YEA!!!!!!!!!!!! i actually don't know who they are either i just listen to them too fdjkfjkkjfd lately spotify's doing most of the work for me <3 ALSO U KNOW ABT JIHOON'S COVER... UR SO- ok we're besties 4 life now <3 CAN I JUST SAY... WHAT THE HELL IS UP W JIHOON.. DOING IT IN THE ORIGINAL KEY.. HE HAD NO BUSINESS SHOWING OFF LIKE THAT OK UR TALENTED N IM A LITTLE IN L*VE W U WE GET IT 😭😭😭

AND NO DFKJFDKJJKFDFDKJDF WHY IS THAT SO FUNNY TO ME 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 HOW DID U EVEN NOTICE!!! NOW IM GONNA HAVE TO LOOK FOR CLIPS OF IT JKFDFJKDFD 😭 they're truly relaxing they cant even be bothered lmaoooo

looks like it'll be much better!! i'm kind of excited for uni ngl <3 i hope everything's well w u as well and that all ur endeavors are bussin <3 u stay hydrated too and get lots of sleep!! <3

#u are always so sweet what if i cry #and get diabetes #ily <3 #🪂 anon #anon #y.ask #long post

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misterbitches · 3 years

Text

@flootweed

ATOTS

That's super fucking romantic? Like tragic but in a nice way. i love that shit. i'm a monogamous slut for romance pghiosuag even tho we have to learn to live alone too but it's just like the NOTION is nice?!??! awwww i told my mom that SOPHIE's gf was like "she died taking a picture of the moon" and how it was like idk. the gf was just processing it and she thought it was romantic and my mom was like "wow.....depressing" bc think she thought it was stupid millenial shit i was like no mother doent u see she died in the BEAUTY LMAO but then i told her jessica walter's husband died the year before and then she died and she was like "aw...kind of romantic" LMAOOOO i guess two people have to die. why did i tell this story? i am so sorry. the show ended today right (ep 10?) i didn't realize it was that short. so i hope it was a happy ending? (tell me) i understand why you love the atmos! it's like, not really been done. there's this BL that i hear isn't too great but it does take place in a rural part of thailand and there's way less budget. a lot of ppl seem to like it. ep 6 LW / LW in gen gotta be honest, rushed through it. i knew spoilers from jump cause BL spoilers are just absolutely nothing and sometimes ur just like i need to know. i do not understand the ~silently lookin 4 u~ trope it always backfires and is also DUMB. so happy about tiffy. a girl who likes girls but ends up with a man bc of mommy and also the man is ok....it's me. she's gorgeous and actually [h*lf] gay so it's great. god ok i feel so old again. lmaooo but i was like obsessed with lady gaga for that reason (dont ask...also how i got kinda popular on tumblr way back in the day) and shes just absolutely fucking beautiful and bad ass. (which kind of doesnt helpcos they r all skinnty but that's FINEEEE) right? i mean like i guess cos we knew abt it? i can see why he was so pissed off, too? i mean i'm so fucking like...sensitive to being told what to do so i was angry for him from jump. i guess i was also looking at it different wholetime cos i knew the spoilers? i'm assuming u did too lmao. so we knew hed be pissed and leave. and frankly that's what sib gets. just for you my friend i will watch it and update. i think MANY times in shows in gen but it is something you notice a lot in BL bc they are just absolute novices most times. in this case, gene's actor mostly well (and i like him as a person just cos he was on that thai 3 girls in a car show and used to date on eof them lmao) can act so i will look over that scene to see how sib's actor plays off him. but the pausing in between sentences or for so long even decent actors or actors doing better. kao is not bad, not great so they will talk slowly because dramatic acting but the problem is most times it's too long. even if the person is an adept actor it won't always work and YES THEN THAT MEANS THE EDITOR COMES IN AND SNIP SNIP SNIP! it's too long. and sometimes it just does not work even if you can act. but it is GLARING when they cant or are average (someoe said this about tharntype and my god lmao tharn..is...so...slow...in...talking...the actor idk his name it's one of em, the other one with the nose (type) is....different not better but he certainly does not talk as slow. they arent bad but they are not good so.) also sometimes they are forgetting their lines. some ppl find this charming. clearly we do not lmao. what is their relation? what is going on there? i don't have a problem with stepbrothers as long as they didn't grow up with that sibling bond. many times blended families really have to watch out for that kind of fraternizing but it's always when theyre older and teenagers bc they didnt grow up w/ each other....i mean they have chemistry so i'm whatever. but. hennYYWAYYYS.actually it's bc im an idiot i didn't read it as Mhok (singular) and aey's father. Yes and his sister who i think i may hate? im like bitch okkkkkk but. his name is lhong. and he is a psycho. i mean so is type. so. oooh it could be that he stole! but also i'm pretty sure cos hes gay lol or did they

not make that explicit? the thing is i had to skip through most of that scene too because the drama was WAY too much for me. too much. lmao. the sister thing i got and it made sense and iliked that. oh yea he is gay and they know. that's a big one.

WBL

haven’t watched color rush! did you like it? i have seen wyel, parts of mr heart, and ofc to my star :)

ohhhhhh ok. i get you. yea he definitely wasn’t being ooc cos i think that....what u said. and also like....ugh i cant even think rn. i like sam lin a lot so i like gao shi de but i gotta say. lmao. hm. first of all. yes it is creepy what he did. it’s fucking weird. and sad that his whole life revolves around him. it’s not as fucking weird as LW but still like when he did the door thing. i was like UMMMMMMMMM cos i really didnt want it to be constructed. and when it was i was like imma suspend my disbelief. but if anyone dared...

and so what he did in s2 i think he just couldnt realize that he was loved back which is why it’s good he WAS ALONE for 5 yrs imo. but he gave shu yi 0 choice and for that i am pretty sure i would be even angrier. i do think though that the father’s role is pretty important but i can see how the show is like....letting that go? bc as fucking weird as GSD is, he was still like...20? i guess and shu yi’s dad is like. crazy? i am also like he really had to fucking start a company to get noticed like are u joking? is it also that easy? and also why? lmao i just. ugh. i think that probs bothered me the most...priorities.

i like the show! well idk if i love it but sure. i think it’s decent lmao. i understand what you’re saying. for here it bothers me less but i certainly don’t think it was OOC. immature and stupid but like...that’s.....what they are. i also don’t have a problm with the timing from a technical point.

however, when i started the show? i had NO clue what concept of time it was. and that was very annoying. tehy redeemed it bc of the comedy aspects (the first time shu yi sees shi de is so fucking good, i really loved the shot and editing; it’s hilarious and silly) and i started to go with the flow of the show through that. but the fucking concept of time in the show in general esp with repetitive outfits (i understand that they are more likely to wear multiple outfits as well, it’s just that you have to split it up or it i sconfusing visually and looks like the same scene twice or just a full day of shooting which it could be but then something should change in the clothes. this is just an ex~~*~*) and partof that is they have this already controlled narrative i guess.

i have to admit as well...i skipped episode 1. and most of 2. i was like i rly dont want to see someone slap a pereson even if they were like. not together. it’s just not cute also not in front of ppl. and then when they were yelling and bla bla i was like listen ladies lets calm down. too much angst in a boring way. what they have now is good. also they should probably like estrange the father but i doubt they will.

i cannot make up my mind totally now bc i see what ur saying i guess i just don’t feel that way as much but i guess i have to think about it more, too. i do think he was contorlling in getting him or like when he didnt want shu yi to find out whwatshisface liked him. i guess for me it would be if he is still that way in the rship. but even tho he’s at fault for what happened, i’m also like but his dad? but also like...did he try? why did he just stop contacting? but then i guess he emailed everyday? DO U C MY QUANDARY.

alsoi have to say i do not care abt their backdoor being opened lmao like wow business? no thanks

LMAO. did they cry a lot in UWMA? i only know the teamwin parts. which one is fluke the really pale one who died? idk what it is about that kid but i just cant watch him. it’s not his fault it’s mine.

DUDE i still dont understand the husband and wife thing and ive looked into it multiple times. ive kinda just classified it as one of those things that make me uncomfortable but arent problematic lol. it you have any insight about it id love to hear it tho !!

it’s stupid. that’s what it is (husband and wife.) it’s just something they say like many gay couples may use pejoratives in conjunction with them, the f word etc. or even imply something about being a top and a bottom. whatever. but these arent gay spaces or gay storylines. sure gay men may direct them but since BL operates and relies on patriarchy without a doubt and also stereotypes poorly kathoeys or won’t cast trans women in anything substantial and use them as jokes (and see this is one of those things where it’s like...ud never see this in the US tho like our concept of third gender or kathoeys but life stillBOOOOO.) so it’s just useless when they put it into the scripts because it’s for people to consume and lots of girls are. obviously. so the idea that if you are being penetrated and u r the wife and this is used like literally anywhere but not from gay or whatever men is gross. are cis women’s vaginas sieves to them? are trans women not women? do we have to categorize people by PHALLIC OBJECTS IN OUR BODIES SPECIFICALLY A WOMAN? it dont make no sense. plus really most ppl just experiment, there’s more ways than one to have sex, we have lives so most times it’s not just full penetration for hours anyway. it’s just so gross. like oh that’s really funny lol ur the wife cos his dick goes in ur butt XD i get it, same. i say “i’m wife’ whenever there’s a penis in me. fucking kill me. it’s not a big deal but it’s just dumb and gross. if they use it they could try and subvert it too like i like how my engineer has a whole absurdly stupid episode about it. but in TT the dad says “if ur the wife i wont accept it” and i was like u know what gals? im good. goodbye.

pgojaihousgajigko THAT’S SOOOOOOO OOWIEOFUGHOIJ WEIRD. FANDOM IS REALLY WEIRD. i have read rpf and written it once upon a time but dont do it anymore uch. i mean it’s weird. no doubt about that. invasive, weird, strange. but very unreal anyway. it is. plus i dont like celebs or fame and think of it as a gross capitalist scheme so i had to stop (also so weird?) but i know very many people like lean in. lean in. LEAN IN. this youtuber i watch did a video on like insanely popular ships (like that 1d one) and their insane fandoms and i just couldnt. it’s so embarrassing? and then they’re so bold????? about it?

yea it would be cool (more queer men or visibly we should say or like out whatever.) but it doesnt necessarily mean that will be good or beneficial i guess? i mean like. i dont know. so much about the genre is about wish fulfilment for young girls. its literally selling some fantasies because the other thing is for BL (i read a paper on this...) esp for girls in more conservative societies they cna maybe replace themselves in the character? but they may not feel a threat as a woman or like their life will fall apart if they engage in sexual things with anyone really. and that’s where i’m like....for a lot of these are they just writing a story and just replacing two men? bc they also seem to think it owrks like that. and in a way that’s what it is bc of the writing and how they use certain terms. you can tell the piece is about pushing a product and less about the real affects of a story. i think ITSAY is a great example of a really intelligent great piece of work that contains multitudes. and the girl was amazing. it just depends on the goal. and for most of the ppl the goal isnt...to do anything. so i dont know. idk how to talk abt representation anymore. it both is and isnt.

i really liked tingting from my engineer a lot (idk if u have seen) she’s so fun and unapologetic. i love how much she drinks and if someone tells her to be ladylike she says no. and i appreciate that in the show when girls were rude to her she said nothing about the girls but said “NO IM NOT LUCKY TO HAVE ALL MALE FRIENDS?” i really want to see her more in the next season. obviously tiffy is goat. super excited to see how their rship develops.

#we best love #lovely writer #we best love fighting mr 2nd

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wanna-17 · 7 years

Text

lee daehwi first meeting! AU

summary: in which you are somi’s best friend and you find out that she has a hidden twin brother who you are a fan of

length: 1.3k

a/n: HIHI so i decided to start a new series which is gonna be a sweet and short one called first meeting! AU with the wanna one members. since it’s really only going to cover your first meeting with the particular member, it’s up to you whether you want to interpret it as romantically or platonic friendship, maybe if the context suits and i get enough requests i could do a part 2 for some in the future? we’ll see but i will be prioritising getting each member done first. but anyways i hope you guys enjoy this first one of my precious baby lee daehwi and look forward to the rest of the members :)

so you’re in high school

and ever since high school started you became best friends with a girl called somi

you guys had different personalities, you were more on the shy side and she was more outgoing

but somehow you guys clicked and found that you guys had a lot of things to talk about and common interests

also during this time produce 101 is airing and you’re absolutely addicted to the show

and lee daehwi, the first centre literally swooped you off your feet

he was no doubt your bias and you’d been voting for him like crazy everyday

and ofc since somi was your best friend you’d always rant about how cute and talented lee daehwi was and somi would just sigh and roll her eyes sometimes

well one day at school your class is given a project to be completed in pairs and obviously you and somi are a pair

usually you two would complete your work at the library but since the weather was really horrible

you guys decided to head to your place over the weekend

and you guys do that except you dont get the work done

so you guys decide to go to somi’s place sometime after school next week to finish it

and tbh you’ve been very curious about where somi lives

even though you guys are best friends you guys always met either in public or at your place

you were just super curious as to what her house was like and why she was lowkey secretive about where she lived

hMMMMMM

so the day before going to somi’s place

you guys are having lunch at school and somi is suddenly like: “oh y/n when you come tomorrow, my twin brother will most likely be home visiting”

and u r like

“WAIT HANG ON A SECNOD U HAVE A TWIN BROTHER?? SINCE WHEN???” you semi yell when you stand up from your seat

you are surprised and shocked bc ur friend has a twin brother and she never told you

“ssHHHHH be quiet” says somi gesturing you to sit back down

and so you do and say

“how come you didnt tell me somi?” while pouting

“well…i guess you never asked whether i had siblings or not” replies somi nervously

“hmm yeah fair enough, well what its like having a twin brother? what’s he like” you ask excitedly

you’d never met anyone that had a twin before and u suddenly find out that your best friend in fact has a twin brother which makes you feel kinda weird and excited

“it’s alright, we’re just like any other sibling pair, he can be slightly annoying sometimes but he’s a good brother overall. i miss him” replies somi looking down

“ohhhhh where is he? does he go to high school here?” you asked wondering if somi’s twin was actually at your school and completely hidden from u

“no he doesn’t”

“where does he go then? and what’s his name? what does he look like?” you asked bombarding somi with questions as you were super curious now

since somi was one of the prettiest girls in the school you were lowkey thinking maybe somi’s twin is really hot HAHA

“i actually can’t say his name but he’s really ugly” says somi laughing

“why not????” you ask somi, “is he a spy or something?? with a hidden identity???”

somi shook her head laughing at you as you continued to pester her about her twin

“you’ll see tomorrow when you come over” says somi “i think things might change when you see who it is” as she sighs

now you were C U R I O U S as to why somi kept it so secret

and for some odd reason, who somi’s twin brother was was all you thought about for the rest of the day

your thoughts went wild as you thought, what if he’s actually a spy? or illegal? a criminal? someone dangerous? what if he’s the youngest ceo in our country?

and for some seriously odd reason you were excited to meet somi’s twin brother

the next day you head to somi’s house with the address typed in google maps

you rang the doorbell and somi opened the door

as you stepped in you saw how the house wasn’t too big nor was it too small it was quite spacious and clean and very cozy

you saw some baby pictures placed up on a shelf of somi and her twin; you recognised somi easily and the twin brother was really cute too

you guys take a seat on the big couch and start working on the project when suddenly you hear footsteps come down the stairs

you were super focused on your work tbh so you didn’t look up

until a voice says

“hey sis is this your friend that always talks about me?”

and the voice is SO FAMILIAR

and you’re suddenly afraid to look up

you do recognise that voice but no way it just couldn’t be

silence

“yep it is” says somi, “look at the state she is in now”

your entire body was frozen and wouldn’t react and you were looking at the ground

“she’s so cute like that” says the voice

you feel your cheeks go bright red and your heart suddenly beating extraordinarily fast

you close your eyes and tell yourself you are dreaming

you take a deep breath and look up

and you are met with a pair of the most gorgeous eyes you have ever seen; one eye was monolid and the other was double lidded but honestly that was what was attractive about him

it was truly lee daehwi lmao sorry i made it so so dramatic haha

he was smiling down at your with the sweetest and cutest smile

“hello y/n! it’s nice to finally meet you!” says daehwi cheerfully

“u-h-h hello– daehwi-ssi” you stutter nervously as you die internally

daehwi laughed and his laughter was like a beautiful melody

“no need to be formal y/n, we’re the same age! you don’t look great right now, i’ll grab a glass of water for you” says daehwi as he heads to the kitchen

when he’s gone you turn to somi straight away

“DUDE WHY DIDNT U TELL ME DAEHWI WAS UR BROTHER?? i wouldn’t have fangirled over him to you and its sooooo embarrassing”

“chill y/n it was actually pretty funny, you totally have a crush on my twin, look at ur face” says somi laughing

“sTOP omg this is all ur fault im so embarrassed, i embarrassed myself in front of my bias” you say as your bury your face in your hands

“seriously y/n this is your chance to talk to him and i don’t usually say this about that idiot but he’s actually a very nice guy, so don’t be nervous anymore”

you take deep breaths and try to collect yourself before daehwi comes back

when he does you’re much calmer even though you still feel like you are living in a dream

“here’s your water” says daehwi as he hands over the glass of water

both your finger trips lightly made contact and you felt your heart racing again

“thanks daehwi” you say giving him a shy smile

he asks what the project is about and starts helping you guys and in no time you guys are done

and daehwi is super friendly and outgoing so in no time you get really comfortable around him

and realise that HES JUST A REALLY NICE AND KIND HUMAN like any human and not some “far unreachable star that’s like a god”

you find out he has cute habits and loves cleaning and fashion and wants to make people happier through his music

you guys talk for the next two hours getting to know each other and you tell him that you’ll continue to support him on produce 101 and he’s super thankful

at this rate somi had literally fallen asleep and is taking a nap on the sofa

he opens up about how it’s hard to meet people’s expectations and that he doesn’t want to disappoint others and you guys have really deep conversations

and in no time it’s already dark outside

and daehwi even offers to walk you to the bus stop

and he puts on a black hoodie with the hood up just in case ppl recognise him anyone watching school 2017 bc i love x’s outfit hehe

you guys reach the bus stop

“y/n it was nice meeting you and i was able to get my mind off things thanks to you”

“no worries daehwi, i’m so glad to have met you and you’re just as wonderful and kind as i’d imagined you to be” you reply cringing at your own cheesiness

daehwi laughs again as he ruffles your hair “you’re so kind too”

“anyways y/n will you do me a favour and not tell anyone that i am somi’s twin? i dont want things to get hard for her if people know about our sibling relationship”

you swoon, he was even so nice to his sister

you nod “of course”

the bus comes and you guys wave goodbye

you couldn’t believe that you met daehwi and got so close to him

he was so nice and down to earth

you lowkey wondered if you’d ever be able to see him again since he was already famous and busy with filming

you convinced yourself that he was probably this nice to everyone and you were really lucky because you were his sister’s best friend

suddenly your phone buzzed and you received a message from an unknown number

“hello y/n, it’s daehwi - i got your number from somi. that’s okay right? next week i’ll be back in town again, so do you wanna hang out? just the two of us this time ;)”

efgqkejfhfjhjf i hope you guys liked this?? i have no idea what the response is gonna be like and lmao i made somi and daehwi twins bc they could totally be siblings :) i realised i probably rant too much lmaooo so let me know what you guys think as i’m always open to feedback and thoughts about my work :) please also look forward to my next one in this series!

#lee daehwi #wanna one #lee daehwi scenarios #wanna one scenarios #wanna one imagines #lee daehwi imagines #produce 101 imagines #produce 101 scenarios #wanna one imagine #lee daehwi imagine #produce 101 #produce 101 s2 #daehwi

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cybernightwanderer · 4 years

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I went over the “How to Recognize the Signs of Mental and Emotional Abuse” article and heres whats familiar : 46 out of 64 Signs LOL

-Name-calling. They’ll blatantly call you “stupid,” “a loser,” or words too awful to repeat here. There were too many times my mom would come to my room yelling and threatning to beat, or actually beat me up and call me a whore and a piece of shit. Still does, just doesnt call me a whore now, just calls me stupid and a a piece of shit occasionally. -Character assassination. This usually involves the word “always.” You’re always late, wrong, screwing up, disagreeable, and so on. Basically, they say you’re not a good person. Everyday AALL DAY. Things i used or barely did as a child , and keeps trowing at as an adult. -Yelling. Yelling, screaming, and swearing are meant to intimidate and make you feel small and inconsequential. It might be accompanied by fist-pounding or throwing things. No need to even explain this. -Patronizing. “Aw, sweetie, I know you try, but this is just beyond your understanding.” “Ah nooo, youll never be responsible to have your own life” -Public embarrassment. They pick fights, expose your secrets, or make fun of your shortcomings in public. Yup...

-Dismissiveness. You tell them about something that’s important to you and they say it’s nothing. Body language like eye-rolling, smirking, headshaking, and sighing help convey the same message. Trying to explain to her i dont like something or i dont wanna do something and why, trying to explain certain things she does harms me. And i just get mocked and threatned instead. - Insults of your appearance. They tell you, just before you go out, that your hair is ugly or your outfit is clownish. Every single day. Also to a point that she did this many times in front of strangers, or in front of my friends.

-Belittling your accomplishments. Your abuser might tell you that your achievements mean nothing, or they may even claim responsibility for your success. Yup -Put-downs of your interests. They might tell you that your hobby is a childish waste of time or you’re out of your league when you play sports. Really, it’s that they’d rather you not participate in activities without them. I stopped practising my drawing skills because she would always say i had no future in drawing characters and shitty stuff. Even tho i was starting and practising. That i had no future in it. -Pushing your buttons. Once your abuser knows about something that annoys you, they’ll bring it up or do it every chance they get. Daily picking fights with me, the yells at me for fighting with her and misstreats me. -Threats. Telling you they’ll take the kids and disappear, or saying “There’s no telling what I might do.” Threatning to kick me off the house whenever i refuse to do something she tells me to. For example, a few years ago, i was barely holding on with a minimal wage , she would take a cut out of it, so there was this month i did a whole month without days off to try and gather money to go to barcelona. She knew i had money saved up and threatened to kick me off the house if i didnt give her extra 100 euros for house rent. Usually stuff like this always. -Monitoring your whereabouts. They want to know where you are all the time and insist that you respond to calls or texts immediately. They might show up just to see if you’re where you’re supposed to be. If i go out with my friends or stay in my friends houses, if i go to a concert or anything, she will non stop be calling me and texting until i reply. Even if i already told her who i would be with and where ( i have to tell her always ) And always have to tell what i am doing. If i dont she will be mad for weeks and take it out on me. -Digital spying. They might check your internet history, emails, texts, and call log. They might even demand your passwords. Like the previous one, she asks my aunt to sent her my ig stuff and fb stuff i post, so i had to remove my entire family from my social network. Because she would always come up to me daily “ ah u posted this why? “ wether it would be a selfie or a poem. And is always messaging me on whatsapp and humiliating me and crontrolling wich picture i post on whatsapp. I generaly like to post my user photo of whatsapp as something funny, wether its my face with a filter, or a funny meme. Two months ago i posted a guy with his ass pinned up, wich was hilarious. She kept yelling at me everymorning, and even threatned to hit me , to take the picture down , because it looked bad. The picture was something like this ( not this, but the pose kinda )

- Unilateral decision-making. They might close a joint bank account, cancel your doctor’s appointment, or speak with your boss without asking. ALWAYS does these kinds of things without my consent. I work 12h a day everyday, im always tired, and i barely have money , and she “trying to take care of me “ will settle apointments for really expensive doctors witouth asking me if i even want, and will get mad at me when i tell her to cancel , saying im a big girl that i have to do it, SO i have to take out sometype of time during my busy work day to make a call to cancel something she settled without even asking me , and will be mad for weeks and take it out on me calling me names and shit. And if i dont accept her “ lending me the money for the apointment “ she will get mad and call me ungratfull and stupid. -Financial control. They might keep bank accounts in their name only and make you ask for money. You might be expected to account for every penny you spend. Well yeah.. dont even need to say anything here. - Lecturing. Belaboring your errors with long monologues makes it clear they think you’re beneath them. Or here... -Direct orders. From “Get my dinner on the table now” to “Stop taking the pill,” orders are expected to be followed despite your plans to the contrary. This daily basis. -Outbursts. You were told to cancel that outing with your friend or put the car in the garage, but didn’t, so now you have to put up with a red-faced tirade about how uncooperative you are. Always calling me lazy and shit for not doing HER OWN STUFF. -Treating you like a child. They tell you what to wear, what and how much to eat, or which friends you can see. I am 30 years old. -Feigned helplessness. They may say they don’t know how to do something. Sometimes it’s easier to do it yourself than to explain it. They know this and take advantage of it. Whatever happends she always plays the pity party card “ ahh im old” , “ ahhh i had an aneurism ( even tho she has been fine for two/three years now LOL )”, “ ahh my blood pressure “ She used that as an excuse to always ditch arguments or important discussions when she is loosing, and if i dont shut up she will threaten to kick me off the house or beat me. For example the other day she was shamming me out of nowhere from trying to commit suicide, and i told her she was one of the main reasons. She immediatly started to call me names, tried to hit me, and trow me out of the car. -Unpredictability. They’ll explode with rage out of nowhere, suddenly shower you with affection, or become dark and moody at the drop of a hat to keep you walking on eggshells. She flips randomly during the day, im afraid to leave my room. Or that she will enter my room. -They walk out. In a social situation, stomping out of the room leaves you holding the bag. At home, it’s a tool to keep the problem unresolved. She humiliates me in public then randomly walks out. -Using others. Abusers may tell you that “everybody” thinks you’re crazy or “they all say” you’re wrong. She likes to tell her friends and our family how “ irresponsable”, “immature” and no good for nothing i am, and how i am LEECHING her off... LOL -Jealousy. They accuse you of flirting or cheating on them. Usualy when i game or sometimes, ppl call me and talk to me, and she will eavesdropp my conversation and enter my room to hear better, or later wait until i leave the room , to complain about how i treat my friends so well , and speak so well to them , and how it is possible that i talk to her bad all the time and treat her like shit (? LOL ) Well for starters my friends dont misstreat me or call me names, or try to humiliate me or control me LOL or even pick fights with me. She will get mad at me for not wanting to spend time with her, and spending time with my friends. That im ungratefull and a bad daughter. LOL -Turning the tables. They say you cause their rage and control issues by being such a pain. This, that its my fault. That its my fault everything. - Denying something you know is true. An abuser will deny that an argument or even an agreement took place. This is called gaslighting. It’s meant to make you question your own memory and sanity. For example the other day , olso on the car, with the suicide attempt talk, i was trying to explain why and i told her my most painfull memory of her, was her beating me up for not knowing how to solve a math problem in 3rd grade. That she punched me several times because she tought i had awnsered 7 instead of 1. And she started yelling at me saying i made that up and shit. Like bitch i was afraid of doing my homework home because you would beat the crap out of me, instead of teatching me LOL. She once again used the “ blood pressure “ excuse and tried to hit me and kick me off the car in mid highway. -Using guilt. They might say something like, “You owe me this. Look at all I’ve done for you,” in an attempt to get their way. Ahh this is a classic. She says i owe her everything she asks for because SHE BIRTHED ME AND RAISED ME. And she used this argument to manipulate me in everything. -Goading then blaming. Abusers know just how to upset you. But once the trouble starts, it’s your fault for creating it. Yup -Denying their abuse. When you complain about their attacks, abusers will deny it, seemingly bewildered at the very thought of it. According to her, she just does everything she does because she cares LOL. -Accusing you of abuse. They say you’re the one who has anger and control issues and they’re the helpless victim. LOLOLOL cannot say this enought, SHE ACCUSES ME of being the abusive one , simply because i talk back, because i dont wanna be around her and because i fight with her LOL. Even tho she starts the fights and im just defending myself from her. -Trivializing. When you want to talk about your hurt feelings, they accuse you of overreacting and making mountains out of molehills. Yup -Saying you have no sense of humor. Abusers make personal jokes about you. If you object, they’ll tell you to lighten up. Yup -Blaming you for their problems. Whatever’s wrong in their life is all your fault. You’re not supportive enough, didn’t do enough, or stuck your nose where it didn’t belong. ALSO YUP -Destroying and denying. They might crack your cell phone screen or “lose” your car keys, then deny it. Tried to break my things numerous of times, or trash them or give them away. Wich she did. -Demanding respect. No perceived slight will go unpunished, and you’re expected to defer to them. But it’s a one-way street. Yup... She will happly tell me how to dress saying what im wearing is ugly, i will politely tell her to stop, she will continue to give her “opinion” i will get tired and yell to stop , she will immediatly demand respect and tell me i have no right to talk back at her and that im disrespectfull and stupid. -Shutting down communication. They’ll ignore your attempts at conversation in person, by text, or by phone. Yup -Dehumanizing you. They’ll look away when you’re talking or stare at something else when they speak to you. Yup -Keeping you from socializing. Whenever you have plans to go out, they come up with a distraction or beg you not to go. Also Yup She wouldnt let me go out if i didnt do my bed, and would make up shit just so i wouldnt go out, until i got tired and gave up. -Trying to come between you and your family. They’ll tell family members that you don’t want to see them or make excuses why you can’t attend family functions. Well she constantly came in between my first real good therapist. I was finally seeing a good therapist a few years ago. I was finally relieved and tought i could trust him, all of a suddent she demanded to be in the therapy sessions. So in the sessions instead of talking about what upset me and her constant mental abuse, the therapist gave in to her demands, and started adressing HER issues with me. I remenber the LAST time i decided to attend the doctor. He would first attend my mom , then me. So i came up, and he started his usual talks, and i wanted to talk to him that day about the nightmares i was having and if he could help me. And all of a suddent he cut the conversation off by saying “ ah wait so your mother tells be you have been staying a lot of time on your computer “ “ that you dont socialize with your friends and that you dont go out “ I mean i wonder why i get stuck in my pc and dont go out with my friends LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL She would always cut me off from meeting my friends, she would always control me, so i had less interest or courage to make friends year by year. And gaming was the only thing that brought me joy in my shitty depressed life coz i couldnt develop any interests. -Withholding affection. They won’t touch you, not even to hold your hand or pat you on the shoulder. They may refuse sexual relations to punish you or to get you to do something. She wil straight up give me the cold shoulder, ignore me if she is mad because i didnt do something how she wanted. When i had hand surgery, she refused to go with me, or get me. By me it was ok , she didnt need to go or anything. So after surgery i told the doctors i would take myself home, and why. And they didnt allowe me and still called my mom even thought i told them she wouldnt. She treated me so badly after picking me up from the hospital because they called her. -Tuning you out. They’ll wave you off, change the subject, or just plain ignore you when you want to talk about your relationship. Yup -Actively working to turn others against you. They’ll tell co-workers, friends, and even your family that you’re unstable and prone to hysterics. YUP -Calling you needy. When you’re really down and out and reach out for support, they’ll tell you you’re too needy or the world can’t stop turning for your little problems. YUP -Interrupting. You’re on the phone or texting and they get in your face to let you know your attention should be on them. Yup -Indifference. They see you hurt or crying and do nothing. Yup - Disputing your feelings. Whatever you feel, they’ll say you’re wrong to feel that way or that’s not really what you feel at all. Yup

#domestic violence #domestic abuse #suicide #depression #anxiety #toxic #toxic mother #toxic behaviour #toxic family #self #toughts #end my life #misery #pain #trauma #end my fucking life #end my existence #end my pain #end my misery

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mental-health-advice · 7 years

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disordered eater for 8+ yrs for the past five months i've been so good and gained a lot of weight. and i didnt mind that i did, ok a little but not enough to relapse. now im always cold and my hair is falling out and ive lost my appetite. im under so much stress and so many ppl are relying on me to be a grown up and i dont even have a job and cant help pay the bills and i just feel like im sinking pretty fast and relapsing is just easier than staying strong. idk what to do. pls help --bbybear

Hi beautiful,

I want to start off by telling you how absolutelyproud I am of you. Gaining weight and feeling good in your body for five fullmonths is a huge deal. You can be so incredibly proud of yourself. You’reprobably going to say - Yeah, butSabrina, I relapsed, why are you so proud? - I am proud because everyonehas a moment in their lives where they relapse, for multiple reasons. Stress isyour reason to be relapsing and I know how much pressure you must be feeling onyour shoulders, which makes it normal that you may be struggling more with yourweight lately. The fact that you have recovered once though, proves me that youcan definitely do it again, even if it might seem impossible at this point ofyour life.

I know at this point you are feeling so much pressurefrom everyone around you. But what I’m going to try and ask you, is to put allthat stress and all those thoughts aside to concentrate on your well being. Iknow you might feel like people are relying on you to be a grown up, but atthis time, that is not what matters most. What matters most is getting youbetter and healthy. You deserve to be happy and I will do my best today to helpyou along this journey.

I’ve had difficult moments, where I have felt thatgiving up was the solution. Where I felt like not eating could make meprettier, make me stronger, make me feel again…Where I felt like that wasmore important than all the beautiful things around me. Truth is, I was wrongand I really see it now. Life is such a beautiful thing and it is important to cherishit, even in harder times. You can’t give up on that, fighting is worth it, Ipromise you.

First of all, I want to talk about the anxiety thathas been consuming your thoughts lately. Anxiety is something so common in oursuper stressful world. Thankfully, there are multiple tricks out there to help themany people who live with stress and anxiety on an everyday basis. Here are someof these tricks :

Keep a journal to write down the multiple feelingsand thoughts overcoming your mind and body. Whenever I feel like things aretumbling down around me, the first thing I do is write and it helps me so much.It is my favourite way of expressing my emotions and I feel like for me, it iswhat is more helpful and effective.

You’ve named the triggers of your stress, now it isimportant to try and avoid them as much as possible. Whenever you feel like thepeople around you are pressuring you too much, you can tell them that you feeluncomfortable with the amount of things they are expecting from you. You canalso excuse yourself away from the conversation when it gets too rough. Aboutthe job, start by taking care of yourself on the health perspective and oncethat will be settled you can start thinking about job applications. For themoment, you could ask to someone you trust if they could help you out for asmall period of time until you get things back on track. The fact of feelingsupported would chase away the financial worries for a moment.

Talking to someone you trust. Pick someone, familymember, friend, teacher, therapist, with who you feel comfortable to talk. Tellthem about your fears and the causes of your stress and about your loss ofappetite. Sometimes, the simple fact of sharing our feelings out loud tosomeone we care about, makes a massive difference.

Set yourself small goals. Stop thinking so big andstart thinking small. One step at a time. For example, a good goal would be : Today, I will get out of bed and eat onesmall meal. Once you have achievedone goal, you can slowly build up towards bigger goals. It is motivational andhelps a lot.

Meditate. Whenever I feel really stressed, I simplytake a moment to lay down and close my eyes. While my eyes are closed, Iconcentrate fully on my breathing, focusing on that and nothing else. I breathein deeply by the nose while counting to four in my mind and exhale just asstrongly while counting to seven. Most of the time, I even end up fallingasleep without even noticing.

Those are the five tricks that work the best for me,but you can also have a look at our Self-Help Tips for Anxiety page on theblog. It is filled with much more amazing ideas. You can try a few out and seewhich ones work best for you.

Now about your eating. I am a little concerned by thefact that you are always feeling cold and losing your hair. I want you to rememberjust how wonderful you are and even though that might not be enough to make youeat again, I really want you to try something out for me alright? Even if it’sa tiny little piece of food per day, I want to eat it. Believe me, I know thatit is much more easier said than done, but I know you can do it. When I was inthat situation, I thought it was impossible.But guess what, it is possible, proof is you did it once and I know you cando it again. I would suggest talking to a professional soon if things do notget better, because I want you to stay safe alright?

You are very brave and I admire you for that. Pleaseremember that we are always here for you no matter the situation. We would lovefor you to keep us updated on how you are feeling, I am sure that a multitudeof positive things are coming for you in the future. You have the strength inyou to fight through your anxiety and disordered eating, I just know that.

Stormsdon’t last forever, your strength will fight the clouds away and let therainbow shine through the sky.

Sabrinaxx

#mhasabrina #bbybear #anxiety #stress and anxiety #stress #pressure #financial trouble #financial aid #talking to someone you trust #loved one #disordered eating #disordered eating habits #calming down #you can get through this

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jealously-is-a-curse · 7 years

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Hello there! You should answer all 100 TMI asks ☺

100 NSFW TMI Questions: 1. Are you a virgin? No 2. Does anyone besides you know your bra/penis size? Yeah everyone knows i have small titties. 3. Do you know anyone who has any STDs? No 4. Were you married when you first lost your virginity? 5. Do you swear under celibacy? Nah fam 6. When did you first lose your virginity? If you haven't, when would you like to? I lost it when I was 17, so in year 12. 7. Have you ever gotten tricked into aphrodisiacs or alcohol for sex? nope cause im not stupid 8. Have you walked in on someone masturbating/having sex?: no thank god, and i hope i never do!! 9. Have you ever seen someone masturbate or have sex with their permission? nah 10. Where is the weirdest place you have had sex? no where really, for me still it the kitchen table like ppl eat of this and i did that on there damn. 11. If you had to chose one, would you have outdoor sex or car sex? outdoor sex, im over car sex. 12. When was the age you first masturbated? Whether you knew it or not? probably 18 years old 13. Have you ever helped someone "finish"? yeah lol every guy my age 14. Have you ever had an erection in the past month? (clitorial counts, too): nah 15. When was the last time you have had an erection? (clitorial counts, too):dunno 16. Have you ever had an erection and someone noticed?:ahah nah 17. What is your method of masturbation? (ie. toys, clitorial, prostate): clitoral 18. What is your bra/penis size?: small size bra 19. Has anyone seen your private parts other than yourself or a family member?:yeah i always walk around naked infront of my mum lmao 20. What is the strangest thing you have ever put up your vagina/anus?:nothing 21. Do you like rough sex or intimate sex better?: i like both, depending on the chemistry between me and the guy. 22. When was the last time you masturbated?: couple weeks ago 23. When was the last time you had sex?: 3 weeks ago 24. When was the last time you watched porn?: does tumblr porn count? if so everyday lol 25. Have you ever bought a sex toy? If so, which one did you buy last? First sex toy? If not, which one do you plan on buying when you do?: first sex toy i brough was a mini bullet, its my fave. 26. Guys: Circumsized? yeah but really isnt an issue for me. 27. Which not-genital part of your body do you like being touched?: my neck 28. Which genital part of your body do you like being touched?: obvi my clit 29. Girls: Are you able to achieve orgasm just through breast stimulation?: no i actually dislike my breast/nipples being touched 30. What color/type of underwear are you wearing?: right now i have pink ones with green leaves on them. 31. Have you ever sent someone a picture or video of you in the nude? Did it include sexual actions?: yeah, whatelse is snapchat for? :))) 32. Have you ever posted a picture of image of you in the nude on a website?Did it include sexual actions? No, no no. 33. Have you ever anonymously sent/posted a picture or video of yourself in the nude? Did it include sexual actions? Nope 34. Have you anonymously sent a sexual ask to someone on tumblr?:nope 35. When was the last time you have had a wet dream?: literally couple nights ago. 36. Which wet dream was your favorite?: I dont think i have any faves cause i dont rememeber them all haha 37. Is there a friend you would willingly have sex with?: maybe, but im scared it would wreck the friendship. 38. Is there a celebrity/character you would willingly have sex with? Oh too many to name. 39. Have you ever masturbated with someone? yeah 40. Have you ever took a shower with someone that is not a family member?: Ive had the opportunity to but i have bad skin conditions so i avoid it haha 41. Favorite sexual position? If you are a virgin, which position interests you?: id say reverse cow girl 42. Do you like being called a slut or whore in bed?: yes 43. Are you into any BDSM?: havent really tried it out but would love too. 44. Have you ever wanted to have sex with someone but knew you couldnt for any reason? Why?: hmm this answer is the same as question 37 45. Turn on's?: guys who eat pussy 46. Turn off's?: guys who dont eat pussy 47. Have you ever had a sexual fantasy about someone? Was it about anyone other than your lover?: nah 48. Have you ever had phone sex? Video sex? Chat box sex?: yeah, i mean who hasnt. 49. What was the weirdest thing that has ever turned you on?: not to sure 50. Do you like dirty talk?: yeah I do, but i hate returning it back haha 51. Are you loud or quiet during sex? Masturbation?: quite as i live at home and all the bedrooms are close. 52. Have you ever been inturrepted during sex or masturbation? Who/what?: nope 53. Most embarressing sex/masturbation story?: guy was eating me out nek min he got a blood nose during it haha so awks 54. Most hilarious sex/masturbation story?: hilarious sex story is guys who last 5 mins 55. What kind of porn do you like to watch?: tumblr porn 56. First type of porn you have ever watched? (ie. lesbian, hentai, threesome): oh in year 12 the boys made me watch black guy with asian girl LOL 57. What was the most recent type of porn you have ever watched? What category was it under?: tumblr porn 58. Most hilarious/stupidest porn you have ever watched?: oh tv shows about girls who go into the porn industry aged 18 and cry over it haha 59. Have you ever fantasized over someone older than you? How much older?Younger? How much younger?: yes yes my year 7 high school teacher, who is probs in his early 30s now, now probs 8 or so years older 60. Favorite sex toy (if any)?: i dont have a fave one, id like to explore new ones 61. Have you ever had to break up with/divorce someone because you weren't satisfied with their sex?: no but i stop seeing guys right away if i dont like the sex with them. 62. Have you ever used anything/gotten any surgeries to improve sexual performance/feel?: no, im only 21 dont need too haha 63. If someone you knew asked for a nude image, would you do it? What about a tumblr follower?: nah wouldnt do it for a tumblr follower 64. Have you ever told someone any wet dreams/fantasies you've had about them?: haha nah i keep that to myself. 65. Do you like to have sex like they do in pornos?: yes 66. Have you ever confessed to someone that you got an erection over them? What about masturbated to them?nah 67. Are you able to be secretive when you masturbate? (like able to be quiet so no one can hear?: yup 68. When was the first time you achieved orgasm?: only couple years ago 69. Is there only one way so far that you have been able to achieve orgasm? (ie. only by using toys, only from 1 positon,only from masturbating a certain way): yeah i can only achieve orgasm with playing with my clit or sometimes getting eaten out. 70. Favorite type of oral?: sucking dick? 71. Strangest sexual positon you've tried?: none yet 72. Have you ever made up a sexual postion?: no 73. Girls: During sex, vaginal or anal?: vaginal 74. Girls: During masturbation, clitorial, vaginal, or anal?: clitoral 75. Do you like to be dominant or submissive?: both 76. Have you ever masturbated to someone?: no 77. Have you ever masturbated because your sexual partner wasn't there when you needed them?no 78. Have you ever had a one night stand? Do you still keep in contact with them?yeah and nah dont even remember his name 79. Have you ever had a friends with benefits? Are they still beneficial?: yes i have and no because feelings get involved. 80. Have you ever had sex with someone who wasnt your partner?: yeah all the time i dont have a boyf 81. Has any of your partners had sex with someone else?: n/a 82. Have you ever gotten pregnant? Were they your lover's or someone else's?: no and i hope it dont! 83. Birth control or condoms?: both 84. Do you ever masturbate to porn?: yes 85. Does anyone know you masturbate? Did you have to tell them?: haha yeah my bestfriend knows 86. Did your parents ever find out you were sexually active?: yeah 87. Do you have any STDs?: no and dont plan on getting any 88. Have you ever masturbated to a fictonal character or celebrity?: no 89. Have you ever had sex during "7 minutes in heaven"?: i dont even know what that means x 90. Spit or swallow? Or do you not like oral?: swallow, i dont like giving head but i do it anyways hahah 91. Have you ever been rejected for sex? Have you ever rejected someone else?: no but yeah i reject sex sometimes 92. Do you have someone who said they are willing to take away your virginity if you havent lost it by a set age or if you just want to have a good time? haha yeah 93. Have you ever experiented with the opposite sex?: no, only kissed a few girls, tho i would like to some day try it out. 94. When you first lost your virginity, was it intended or spontanious?no not at all. was scary lol 95. Has anyone ever walked in when you were taking a shower with someone? no 96. Did you ever tell someone once you lost your virginity?: yeah my bestfriend, few of my friends and my mum aahah 97. Does your lover know if you have masturbated?: i wish i had a lover 98. Does your lover know that you want to have sex with them but cant? n/a 99. Do you like masturbation?: yes 100. (Asker's ask) If i were to ask you if we could have sex, would you say yes? : no sorry xxx

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