#after i was gone for so long

[fllowered]

Hiiiii <333 omg ive been thinking abt u for days now... wondering where u were since i hadnt seen u on my dash lately (i meant to look ur blog up to check today but u posted!!!) happy birthday!!! I know how u feel abt ur birthdays feeling lonely and not special :( i feel the same on mine... tbh they stopped having any significance since i became an adult. They're just an identification thing for me now. I think its totally okay to not want to do anything special and no one has the right to tell u what to do!!!! Regardless, i hope you have a lovely day today <3 mwah

hiiiii 💓 thank u so much for taking the time to send me such kind words <3 i’m sorry that i disappeared for a while there... sometimes you’re just sad and need to disappear for some days. also, you? thinking about me??? DHHJDH what a privilege to exist in someone else’s mind !!! truly !!! thank u for the birthday wishes <3 my birthday is honestly a lonely day for me so i only hope it passes by without any incident every year... and yeah after you become an adult it stops having the same meaning... i will probably do what i always do on birthdays: order takeaway and eat it alone in my room... typing it out makes me seem like a loser huh anyway i want to thank you again for being so kind to me during a hard time. from the bottom of my heart, thank u 💓💓💓💓💓

#thank u so much 💘💘💘💘💘 #i truly can’t express how much i appreciate ur message #also crying over the idea of someone thinking of me #after i was gone for so long #like ?? ppl think of me ??? screaming crying etc #no but like seriously... thank u <3 #what an honour ! #u r so kind 💘 #also i hope u have a nice birthday this year ! #even if we aren’t into celebrating them i hope the day goes ok at the very least #it’s going to be a long day .. #birthdays are like.. try not 2 cry challenges #fhdhdhff #anyway . THANK U 💘💘💘 #much lov 💘 #take care today !!!

[petricorah]

scenes i loved from Real Enough to Get Me Through by @marriedzukka <333 [ids in alt]

#zukka #zukka fanart #sokka #sokka fanart #zuko #zuko fanart #atla #atla fanart #avatar the last airbender #zukka fic rec #myart #yall. yall. dani. this FIC #first off it made me cry twice. not like 'oh im crying' internet speak no. like. eyes are too blurry to read let me stop this for a sec #it is SO GOOD #your prose? amazing #your insights on grief? life changing #THEM??? THEM their relationship and trust #'zuko looked at him and his world shifted on its axis' #ive been thinking about that line for WEEKS STRAIGHT #i can't tell you how many passages i screenshot just because of how beautiful or cute they were #the moment of seeing the painting of sokka's mom? how did you manage to make it so telling character wise--so sweet so PAINful AND so #cute with their relationship?!!?! #'oh so you think i'm beautiful too' #GOD #i had so many scenes i wanted to draw it was crazy #also #'Our loved ones leave impressions on us that can still impact our decisions and feelings even after they're gone' #fuck. had me crying AGAIN #seriously this fic is so wonderful and not just through a zukka lens. truly life changing you're an AMAZING writer #the fandom is so lucky to have you and i can't Believe it took me so long to get around to reading this masterpiece

[bizarrelittlemew]

calling it right now that season 3 starts like this

#so confused about people saying the season finale feels like the end because to me it didn't at all #there's like 5-10 issues immediately set up for another season #they're in a happy place at this point because they've both realized their love is bigger than anything else #and makes it worth working on their problems together #the problems are still very much there #both of them have deep self esteem/self loathing issues that haven't been resolved in the week since ed woke up #ed doesn't know about stede's trauma #they haven't talked through anything #and they'll be shit at starting/running an inn lmao it's not gonna go well #and those are just some of the internal issues #then there's prince ricky and all the authorities that would very much like to get their hands on both blackbeard and stede bonnet #because stede just full-on kept using his government name after faking his death. nice one #the crew are not “gone” they're more like off to college for a bit but will probably run into trouble immediately #again because while they escaped to the ship they didn't eliminate the threat (the british empire) #it's not a forever goodbye #ok this got super long already anyway i have a whole fic marinading in my brain until i've finished these 4 wips i'm in the middle of ✌️ #hope we get a renewal soon because i want to see the rest of their story!! #ofmd s2 spoilers #ofmd s2 #ofmd #our flag means death

[buttercupshands]

can you even call it a warm up if I'm going to bed without drawing anything big

and a sketch I made while sitting in the park today

#sketch #my art #bnha #shigaraki tomura #tenko shimura #all for one #midoriya izuku #bnha manga spoilers #only after I finished basically polishing this sketch did I notice how it's basically dark and light mode #also the first one is basically a redraw of illustration from vol 11 #I know that translation of Tenko's words is different in official but eh #fanart #I've kind of recovered from recent chapters #and I was analysing those chapters all morning #I'm still thinking but otherwise the chapters are so good #also did you notice that AFO actually talked about how his other him didn't use that 'last thing' yet and that was in ch 410 #and in ch 419 he did so it's real and it's still sad #but still AFO was never hiding it enough #from Tomura maybe but we as readers actually saw his plans play out #in any case I'm still just sitting with those two Izuku and Tenko interaction chapters #I waited long enough #and if you don't count AFO's return Izuku DID save Tenko and it's so interesting #since he now has to save his OTHER origin that was in ch 237 taught to kill whatever he wants #Tenko and Tomura both had 'origins' chapters and for now we only worked with 235 and 236 #and even if Izuku helped with the start of 237 there's still AFO #in any case it was a hard week #also the second thing actually had them holding hands #and then I was like 'but at that point Izuku's hands are gone oh no' #and it was just Tenko holding air where the hand was destroyed #in any case that scene.

[drawnfamiliarfaces]

i... wrote a smol fic (っ´▽`*)っ

also!!!!! If you haven't seen it - shoutout to first ever published fic in Ninja Showdown/My Immortal Soul tags - Lustrous Red by @missadmyre !!!

#ninja showdown #my immortal soul #first ninja x chase young #rc9gn first ninja #first ninja #rc9gn #chase young #xiaolin showdown #randy cunningham 9th grade ninja #rc9gn plop plop #well i say smol fic.... but those 4k words felt very long. #i did say i was going to direct my energy into writing >.> and now look at me ive gone insane #no actually dont look at me im just gonna go cry over my 20k words of rough drafts for like dozen ideas that are now going #to haunt my every waking moment like JESUS i woke up today and literally wrote out 1k words of an idea for a modern au for those two TToTT #its literally an au where its a meet cute turned meet violent and first is randy's sorta dad and chase wants to adopt omi #not to mention a different AU where its an epic mystery adventure AAAAAAA someone heeeelppppp meeeee #also. its been a month but im still staring so intently at missadmyre's fic hoping for another crumb. like thank you sm for the food!!!! #ive literally been rereading it several times after i went insane about it on my main blog and im still slurping at it like a starved perso #Ive been collecting my ideas like a dragon but after reading that fic i was like: I WANT TO READ MORE FICS ABOUT THEM #but i dont wanna be a whiny baby&beg others and be annoying about it. So i put on my big person pants and was like f it WE R WRITINg NOW #so i dont care how bad my writing will be. we gonna be balling on those ideas and YES it doesnt make sense im just v rambly rn

[livvylubug]

Hey!!! So in your Murder Drones AU After Death, what is Uzi and Vs goal (I’m guessing CYN is just tagging along!) and how’s N doing/in his quest?

The AD Crew’s goal is just about what you’d expect, Stop the absolute solver, Save the universe.

And N?

Oh he’s doing great!

Bonus doodle below the cut:

#so obviously hes not doing great #we call this one depressioN #murder drones after death #Also cyn isn’t JUST tagging along #after all she was plagued with the solver herself for who knows how long #she wants it gone and knows the most about it so she’s a team player! #murder drones #murder drones cyn #murder drones v #murder drones n #murder drones tessa #murder drones Uzi #murder drones j #art #digital art #I am a SUCKER for them having each others hats #I mean a SUCKER I will KILL for this trope #alternate universe #au #after death #murder drones au

[svtskneecaps]

lukewarm take of the evening: y'all care too much about being ""outdated"". fellas this smp moves inhumanly fast. it is ok to CHILL holy shit CHILL. y'all are like "(posts BANGER ART) super late guys sorry" friend i am hitting you with a blanket i am snapping you with my metaphorical towel WHAT DO YOU MEAN SORRY. "(posts BANGER FIC) rip this is outdated now" WHO CARES???? I LOVE YOU, OK. ohhhh woe is us as the fandom at large for having MORE HAPPY PILLS ARC CONTENT oh no how outdated!! how could you be writing speculative fiction about how forever felt during happy pills :( slash SARCASM!! WHAT DO YOU MEAN!!!! THERE ARE SO MANY BANGER ARCS, WHAT, YOU THINK WE'RE COMPLAINING????? FOR GETTING MORE OF THE CONTENT WE LOVED????? oh no we're past the period where everyone thought green gay ninjas were like Dead Dead, my work is now outdated and noncanon :( WDYM. GIMME. A BANGER IS A BANGER IDC IF IT TAKES THREE MONTHS. you think rome was built in a day?? fuck you, baltimore, GIMME. my ass has been cooking a goddamn backflipo family fic since july when it was ALREADY outdated do you think i fear god??? "oh no, you're making an edit of slime's (attempted) egg murdering spree?? how could you, that was months ago it's irrelevant" SAID NO ONE EVER.

save your wrists kidlings ok carpal tunnel is no joke. CHILL!!!!! CHILL!!!!!!!! TAKE YOUR TIME SHEEEEEESH OK LOVE YOU <3

#qsmp #shut up vic #block game brainrot #IT IS OK TO NOT ALWAYS POST SHIT THIRTY SECONDS AFTER IT HAPPENS!!!!!!! #for god's sake we have MONTHS of lore and bangers ok??? #i still have a mental image of an art i wish i could make from BOBBY'S NIGHTMARE #HE HAS BEEN GONE FOR M O N T H S and you bet your ass if i can make it I WILL BE POSTING IT #SO. MUCH. SHIT. HAS. HAPPENED. who cares if it was months ago!!!!!! #it's ok to be a few days late!!! it's ok to be a few months late!!!!! don't tell me sorry for feeding me!!!!!! #part of me still lives in I'M NOT HOLDING A FUCKING FUNERAL CHAT #part of me still lives in maxo's final song for his son!!!! #part of me still lives in the day we thought ramón was gone for good #part of me still lives in cellbit sprinting to his son only to be ripped away back to the feds just as richas turns to write a sign #part of me still lives in the flooding of the copacabana ocean #THESE ARE BANGERS. REMEMBER WHEN FIT FOUND PAC E MIKE IN PRISON. BANGER. #oh dear new work expanding on a canon moment i super liked that happened months ago how late smh SAID NO ONE EVER #TWO CAKES!!!!! TWO CAKES MOTHERFUCKER!!!!!!!! WE LOVE PASTRIES DON'T EVEN WORRY ABOUT IT #COME ON Y'ALL. METAPHORICAL KISSES. LOVE YOU. HAVE A GOOD WEEK. #long tags

[thejasontoddarchives]

Brothers in Blood will trick you into thinking it’s just a silly crack scenario brought to life and Jason just concocted this plan for shits and giggles. Then you get a single page like this:

Nightwing (1996-) #121

that reveals he wanted/desperately needed shreds of acceptance even if it was coated in layers of resentment irritation and doubt after going through this:

Batman (1940-) #650

And it had to be from someone who isn’t Bruce

#jason todd #dick grayson #dc #brothers in blood #look sometimes people need to find the least vulnerable way to be vulnerable and this was that #because the fact is he is vulnerable but the last time he revealed that without undercutting the moment with jokes and giggles #it turned out fabulously wrong for him #if he distracts Dick as much as possible so he'll never find out how much of a mess he is right now or what he actually wants #he can still get that confirmation that Dick cares about him without risking something happening that would be his second final straw #even the telegram where he finally sort of reveals what this was about by thanking Dick for still having his back he has to make it wacky #the ww3 comic that preludes this is even more fascinating #because I do think the cover art is ... impactful? #Jason's holding the Nightwing suit in one hand and the red hood helmet in the other and looking solemnly at his Robin suit glass case #granted it is the pill helmet but still. anyway #he’s doing this not long after Bruce slit his throat and prior to that told Alfred to keep the glass case as in the cave in uth #because meeting Jason again changed nothing and he might as well still be dead to him so that uber-tombstone stays #ofc Jason never heard that convo but it's clear he put the pieces together by himself now while looking at the case #and he’s stranded as to what he should do + silently devastated #because he knows now that he doesn’t matter (in the only way that does matter) to the one person who was the most important in his life #after his parents were gone #so then he decides to come to Dick with this because he really is the only other person who was in his life if only very briefly #anyway that was just my interpretation of that cover but how Jason is actually written in the story is just … off in many ways #but yea #this page and that ww3 cover did kinda solidify what his motivation was for the brothers in blood arc #it was good #if only the execution of everything else was better … The premise/foundation was there

[general-cyno]

apparently it's the 15th anniversary of zoro's sacrifice in thriller bark (not sure if manga or anime though) so yknow. time for more zolu of course

one of the many things about zoro and luffy is that despite how their approach to certain situations might differ at times, they're still pretty similar at their core, sometimes to a comical degree (see: their definition of what a hero is back in fish man island arc). and this understanding of how the other works is what leads to moments like jaya,

this little one in water 7/enies lobby,

and follows consistently all the way to wano arc.

and I was thinking the other day about how their childhoods too kinda mirror or parallel each other's in a way that emphasizes (to me, at least) how special zoro's particular protectiveness toward luffy is, and why luffy relying on zoro that way is just as special.

the specifics of their childhood stories are different but both luffy and zoro have a turning point of sorts that's marked with the grief and loss of sabo and kuina, respectively, which leads them to say these:

(I cropped the panels, but luffy's also crying here)

it's important to note zoro and luffy had dreams/aspirations before this, to become the greatest swordsman and luffy's secret thing that we've yet to learn about (that ace, sabo and the crew now know). however, losing kuina and sabo is what prompts them to, on top of that, strive to become stronger for other people's sake. for zoro, it's his way to honor his friend and fulfill their shared dream. for luffy, it's to avoid losing the people he loves.

throughout the story, zoro and luffy end up expressing similar frustration and sentiments due to this. there's zoro innerly chiding himself for being too weak as he trains in the aftermath of arcs like little garden, alabasta and thriller bark, where the crew get stuck in situations in which zoro isn't able to help as he wishes he could (the wax cake, the sea prism stone cell, kuma). there's luffy swearing he won't lose a single member of his crew even if it kills him (the davy back fight) and reproaching himself for not being able to save any of the straw hats in sabaody, with the worst of it right after losing ace in marineford.

(and man do I have thoughts about bon turning into zoro, out of all the straw hats, back in impel down.)

anyway. as to why all of this is meaningful - when zoro agrees to join luffy, he mentions that his goal to become the greatest swordsman is all he has. yet as the straw hats go from journey to journey, and with a certain emphasis in luffy, you can see how zoro's view slowly shifts. he's now driving himself to become strong to protect them as well, to the point he's willing to set aside his ambition and offer his own head in exchange for luffy's, if it means he can ensure luffy's life and safety. that's huge. as mihawk inwardly points out, zoro has something, someone he values even more than his ambitions and pride. and it's through his adventures with luffy and the crew that he becomes closer to achieving that initial dream of his.

whenever people wonder why zoro's as loyal as he is to luffy, aside from all the reasons why luffy as a character has earned that loyalty through his actions, I also remember that one line koushiro said to zoro in a flashback: "the pinnacle of swordsmanship is the power to protect what one wishes to protect and cut what one wishes to cut. a blade that injures all that it touches isn't really a sword." while sure, it works in the context of later power ups like haki, imo it perfectly captures zoro's character growth too and what luffy's given him. the current zoro isn't lost or directionless with only one purpose in mind or to live for, bounty hunting as a means to survive. he has a home to return to, people to cherish, to protect and keep getting stronger for, people who nurture him in turn. kuina's death is something zoro couldn't have prevented, and losing people in accidents like those is something that could happen again, but still within the limits of what's preventable - zoro can protect his friends now.

as for luffy... zoro kinda steals the spotlight when it comes to grand gestures of loyalty/devotion and being the MC of the story means luffy fights for different people (both crew and non crew), carrying their wishes and hopes as if they were his own. he gets help and learns from others as well and all members of the crew are important for luffy to achieve his dream one way or the other, but the way he relies on zoro specifically is so subtly meaningful to me. we don't get as much insight on luffy's inner thoughts, still, we do have context.

for someone like luffy, who is at his innermost genuinely terrified of being alone and losing the people he loves, the fact that he trusts zoro to protect and keep everyone safe (even luffy himself) is so good. as shown above, luffy vowed to become strong in the first place to ensure he'd never go through loss like sabo's again and this vow is all the more renewed after ace's death. luffy has to be strong for everyone but... the fact that he can trust zoro to follow his lead even when others might not understand his reasons to do x or y, that he's so unwavering in his faith that zoro will protect the others when luffy can't, entrusting the people he cares about to zoro, whom luffy also cherishes - it's all pretty special. everyone in the crew has their strengths and zoro may not be the only fighter, but all of them, including sanji, fall under his protection whenever it's needed.

it's not only about raw strength though. zoro's also there to set luffy straight and remind him of what's important when the circumstances arise, like in water 7 or punk hazard. and even when they don't necessarily agree, like wrt vivi's situation after the reverie in marijoa, luffy knows when zoro's right and acquiesces (albeit grumbling a little) because, once again, he's also aware that zoro wouldn't just risk everyone's safety. luffy listens to him. and their reunion in wano too, luffy's sheer happiness at the sight of him again, is a very clear example of how much luffy adores zoro even beyond all that.

although luffy isn't aware of what happened in thriller bark (that we know of), zoro's actions are proof of why luffy trusts, has faith in, and relies on zoro as much as he does and why it's so important for luffy to have him by his side, considering how afraid he is of being unable to keep his loved ones safe. this is more on a speculative note, but I can imagine how comforting that must be for luffy - to not shoulder that on his own.

happy anniversary!

#zolu #tp #long post #yeah it's me. again #happy anniversary to zoro reinventing love and devotion for luffy y'all #I meant to add but I would've gone on a longer tangent if I had AJSJ #that yeah you could count whiskey peak as the one time luffy didn't trust zoro but eh it's like #1) I'm not sure how much of it was meant to be serious 2) their chemistry is so ridiculous they can't even fight properly #without falling into sync with one another and 3) luffy doesn't doubt zoro's intentions after that again #aaand you could argue this whole unwavering faith in zoro may have its drawbacks (sabaody) but #within the story it's not really something he holds against luffy but it is something that at least motivates him #to tell luffy to get his shit together. which is tasty imo #jay reads op

[foreversaba]

Then and now.

#19 days #zhan zheng xi #jian yi #jianxi #old xian #one of the panels of them with the fireworks was my lockscreen for a long time back in 2016 or so #god can you imagine the strength of old xian who has been dragging 19d for years #back then there used to be a theory that the whole story would end after 19 full days because like in 120 chapters only a week had gone by #i dont know if that applies now.... #i wonder. #19d

[pxltown]

if only we knew the things we’d know

#opening my game and coming back to this specific build always feels like coming back home after being gone for so long #i miss building and i miss my sims :( #trying to force my brain to leave this rut! #sims 4 #ts4 #ts4 build #ts4 builds #ts4 exterior #simblr #build: puerto sampaguita #save: isla sampaguita #i forgot my tags rip ajdhfak #pxl

[lazycranberrydoodles]

wei wuxian really put his whole pussy into the donghua yiling patriarch reveal huh

#the huge flock of crows and the green fire and the dark aura and the resentment spikes(??) #[megamind voice] PRESENTATION!!!!!! #not art #mdzs #currently looking for backgrounds for the mdzs aa au. involves rewatching parts of the animation and WOAH #sorry he killed and maimed and cannibalized and tortured all those people :/ he looked sexy doing it #the gender stored in the yiling laozu cannot be understated. GOD i wish i could cosplay him #i wish. they couldve put in the wwx/jc reunion in s1e15 :( #jiang cheng my (indecipherable noises) #hes so relieved and happy!!!!!! the reunion scene URGHRGRHRG. genuinely torturing wen chao IS a bonding moment #adn it speaks to the whole horrors of war thing.. when you have nothing left to bond over (because yunmeng burned) you bond over violence #and the fact that it is in THIS scene that its very emphasized how close they are/how much they trust each other/how they grew up together #. ouhhghhhh. #wwx is quipping at him about being a sect leader and jc is complaining about how long he was gone. they are so incredibly severely #traumabonded guys. ugh. also honorable mention to the cql after-lotus-pier-burning scene for being fucking heartbreaking. love you mwah #mdzs spoilers #at this point in time lan “cannot talk about his emotions” wangji and jiang “bitches and complains as affection” cheng and wei “arrogance #and self destructiveness" wuxian are not communicating very well. shocker #to delete l8er

[luck-of-the-drawings]

OH ARTHUR BENNETT.. such a gorgeous and intriguing character. terribly burdened by a GRUESOME set of crimes, his light suffocated by a HEAVY century of GUILT. so tragic, so dark and broody, and yet PAINFULLY awkward in any social setting ever

#jrwi fanart #cw blood #jrwi show #jrwi suckening #arthur bennett #OUHH THIS ONE WAS SITTING IN MY WIPS FOR SO LOOOONGwhen i took it out there was mould on it :sob: #BUT i think i was able to fix it up okay #i keep seeing SO MANY MISTAKES RRAAAHHH BUT YOU DONT SEE THEM RIGHT?? THATS ONLY ME. RIGHT?? EXACTLY. #THE KEY IS TO SAY. AND REPEAT AFTER ME. 'FUUUCK IT WE BALL #so anyway. arthur bennett huh? grizzly says that arthur is reaal fuckin difficult to play. and i SUPER get that. i mean LOOK AT HIM.. #grizz often needs a minute to think abt what hes gonna say in a way that matches w that Stoic Personality. which is FAIR but also that #ends up making way for awkward confrontations like: the lady in the parky lot. he took too long to answer and scared her away.& I LOVE THAT #arthur is tragic and sad and cool and stoic but hes ALSO awkward and silly and kinda dumb and short sighted. HE HAS COMPLEXITIES #I LOVE WHEN TTRPG CHARACTERS HAVE A GOOD SET OF SHORTCOMINGS. ESPECIALLY WHEN U FIND THEM ONLY AS U PLAY THEM. #I COULd go on and on saying the same things w different words abt arthurs intriguing and entertaining character but i shall spare u. for no #ILL ALSO MENTION HOW MUCH I LOVE HIS FLAVOR THO.. I LOVE TALL HOT BOY WHOS ONE W THE DARKNESS.. I REMEMBER WHEN HE FIRST MENTIONED THE #BADLUCK. N I WAS LIKE OOOHH THATS WHY HIS DESIGN IS SO COOL N CHAOTIC N ASYMMETRICAL. HES UNLUCKY!!! i love love love his design so much... #GRaaauruguguraguhhghghgh what else what else is there for me to spew on abt...i think im reachin a limit here..OH MAGNUS. i hope that #we get to know more abt how magnus and arthur met.. like How they became besties... ouuhh... I ALSO WANNA KNOW MORE ABT MARY DAVIS. LIKEHOW #he also apparently spent alotta time in a zone dominated by edward twilight? all he remembers is constant partying? I WANNA KNOW MORE.. #i think i got room 4 one more ramble SO. THE ART PIECE.as i said its gone a lil stale BUT. im still very proud o the bits where hes allScar #I WANNA SEE HIM GET SCARYMORE. I like the idea of shadows solidifying to make him strange and eerie.like TEETH n CLAWS n SPINES n YESS #also the SILVER EYES.no1 does silver eyes like the show Claymore. they make em look so striking and eerie...i also like to think that #human arthur had deep beautiful brown eyes.just in my beaitufl heart.i mean look at him..i wanna cook him n eat him.ANYWAY #i think thats all my ramblin for this piece. now i gotta go cancel a single day i had ata hotel bc my work schedule change last minute FUCK #feel free to ramble in my tags aswell tho i read all of them and i chew on thenm and i love them so sos os mcuh

[hydrachea]

Yknow I was also thinking... if Neuvi were to ask Furina to become immortal again for his sake, she might actually say yes. Which is exactly WHY he'd never ask her to do so, because as much as he dreads her inevitable absence, he won't condemn her to that fate again

You got it. Because when she took on that curse half a millennium ago, it was also a request she agreed to. For the sake of all of Fontaine and not just the sake of Focalors, but it's still all too similar. Even if she said yes to him because she actually wants it then, who's to say she'll always want it? Who's to say the decades, the centuries won't weigh heavier and heavier as they pass, just like before? Who's to say she won't have to ask him to make her mortal again? And that would be even more painful than simply letting her go when she's meant to. So instead he'll treasure the time she has, that she's more than earned, and he'll do everything he can for her to treasure it too.

#anon #ask #answer #genshin #genshin spoilers #neuvifuri #i don't actually like character death much it bums me out #that said i dislike stuff that's out of character even more #so i'm glad we're in agreement #sometimes living forever ever after isn't the happy ending #sometimes turning the last page of the story and closing the book is the best thing there can be #and you can put the book back on the shelf and keep the happy memories of its story close to your heart #it's like zhongli says #someday furina will be long gone and so will everyone who knew her #but as long as neuvillette remains then so will his memory of her #he'll remember her as she was - free and with her fate in her own hands at last #the history books will remember the lead actress who gave her everything for fontaine #neuvillette will remember her as she was after she left her grandest stage and became just furina #getting sentimental in the tags? on MY blog? it's more likely than you think

[thermodynamic-comedian]

ultrakill lore enthusiasts (me) when the small machine destroys the very big machine

#THE POETICISM #DO YOU UNDERSTAND??? #V1 WAS CREATED FOR THE SPECIFIC PURPOSE OF DESTROYING THE EARTHMOVER #TWO MACHINES CREATED BY MANKIND SURVIVING ON AFTER ITS LONG GONE #AND THEY STILL FIGHT....NEITHER OF THEM UNDERSTAND WHY... #THE EARTHMOVER IS V1'S PURPOSE. ITS FATE. ITS REASON FOR EXISTENCE. #IT EXISTS TO DESTROY IT. ITS CREATION IN THE NAME OF DESTRUCTION ITS #THE INHERENT LOVE PRESENT WITHIN THAT DESTRUCTION #WAAAAGGHHHH #ultrakill #ultrakill v1 #v1 ultrakill #ultrakill earthmover #earthmover #earthmover ultrakill #ultrakill act 3 #ultrakill violence #the layer being violence too...the violence of humanity...the violence of creating something just to create more violence with it.... #i am so normal #undescribed #no id

[pastafossa]

Pet loss below the cut.

Cato was my cat. That's the long and short of it.

From the first night I had him when he curled up against my neck to fall asleep with me, to his final night when he curled up on my chest to try and comfort me, there is not a single day I've been home that I haven't had my kitten chow with me. He was my tiny shadow, always trotting along after me or singing at me from around the house with that long Siamese wail or bringing me scores of socks he hid god knows where (although once he brought me an entire umbrella instead, which he was understandably proud of). He was by my pillow every night cuddled up against my arm, and we fit together like two puzzle pieces, like that little crook in my arm was designed for him, for his exact shape and size. He was with me through my health issues, through high school and college, through moving states, through covid, through tears, through the loss of other pets. He was there as I really learned to write, and there is not a single chapter of TRT that was written without his presence for at least a section of it even if it meant I had to stop editing or writing for a bit and just stare at the words instead because he wanted to be held NOW. And he even managed to hold off the cancer just long enough to walk with me through mom's hospital stay and her return home. I was his person, and he was my soul cat, a piece of me.

I was so torn last night. He was clearly in pain, dehydrated, wobbly, confused and restless, and couldn't get to the litter box. It had been really clear this week the moment was coming, that the cancer was going to take him soon. I'd had this big plan, to have it all happen at home in peace. He hated the vet, hated the stress, but it happened so fast, and I just... knew he couldn't wait for the vet's office to open so she could come here. He'd chosen his time and it was now.

I held him at the emergency vet when they gave him the sedative. I managed to choke out that silly singing tone that always made him happy, as I called him every last nickname he knew: my Cato-wato kitten chow, my Cato kins, my little Mr. meow meow, my sweet happy baby kitty. I made sure all he could see with those big beautiful blue eyes of his was me, as I petted his soft little ears and scratched his neck just the way he liked. And he actually managed to purr for me. He purred as he slipped away and the lights went out, and it was the last sound I ever got to hear from him.

I already miss you so, so much, my sweet old kitty, my Cato kitten chow. I'm sorry it couldn't be at home. But thank you for purring for me. Thank you for spending your journey with me. Thank you for the love you gave me. Thank you for the big meows and the headbonks and perching on my shoulder to interrupt with a breaking news story of Meow Meow. Thank you for the stealing of hundreds of my socks over 16 years and the way you always wanted to sit on me regardless of convenience or your own comfort. Thank you for letting me scoop you up for head smoochies, guarding me from nightmares, and solemnly supervising over 150 chapters of TRT. My soul cat, my baby kitty, my lovebug. I will always love and miss you. And one day I'll see you again.

#tw: pet death #cato the siamese #this is the hardest pet loss i've ever experienced #i didn't want to leave him there. it was so so hard walking out without him #i'll have his ashes in a few weeks and i have plans to get a tattoo of his pawprint but this is going to be rough for a while #he was such a part of my daily life for 16 years and now he's just gone #it's been so long that i don't really remember how i did things without him around #and now even having to feed the other kitties makes me cry because he's not there to meow at me to hurry or trot after me #i miss him