#and then all that with where i am right now with creative stuff and its just like... | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

fairuzfan · 1 month

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I don’t ask this expecting you have THE answer or that there is one, but I follow a non Palestinian white man on insta (in addition to many Palestinian folks in diaspora and in Palestine) who mostly shares things from Palestinian ppl/sources.

He has several times criticized / shared criticism of charity dinners, music festivals etc raising funds for Gaza with the perspective of, it’s not appropriate to have a dance party or dinner while people are undergoing genocide, but also that in this moment, art isn’t resistance because there needs to be physical resistance, blockades of weapons, etc.

I’ve seen this echoed from some others especially critiquing white folks trying to claim “joy is resistance” right now, which makes sense to me, but i also wonder if it’s reductive to say art or music is not resistance because I feel like it can have a lot of power especially alongside social movements… was wondering if you had thoughts on this or perhaps knew where I could look to learn more.

Please ignore if this is too much, and thank you

I think things like writing and illustration and music feeds into the spirit of revolution and is necessary in that way. You have to energize the masses somehow, and to ensure that your message spreads as far as possible. A good way is to make art, or to sing a song, or write a story.

That's why Wisam Rafeedi wrote his book and different resistance factions make posters and videos — to spread their ideas and garner support among the masses.

It's not as important as putting yourself in immediate physical danger to incapacitate the colonial entity — but I think for Palestinians and other colonized peoples, they do need to make art to really process their thoughts. Of course there's a difference when a Palestinian in Palestine, a Palestinian in the diaspora, a nonPalestinian ally of color, and a NonPalestinian white ally do this. I won't deny that there's a nuance when it comes to this.

But writers who write about Palestinian Liberation historically have been assassinated because of how they participate in liberation actions and also spread ideas of liberation themselves. I don't know which white guy you're talking about but I feel like this is mostly a conversation that should be led by Palestinians if we're talking about Palestine because they understand the nuance of saying statements like "the only resistance is physical." I understand what he's saying to an extent but that does erase a lot of Palestinian resistance the past few decades by making sweeping statements like "art is not resistance" and kind of simplifies the issue at hand.

Charity dinners and galas and that stuff... I don't know what I think about them, I think that people are going to do it either way so my opinion doesn't really matter. Hey, if you're going to raise thousands of dollars for Palestine, I'm not going to stop you at all. I personally think you should try to avoid posting pictures and stuff like that from the gala itself if you're going to host one just out of courtesy.

I guess overall what I'm trying to say, art resistance becomes physical a lot of the time. I think its really reductive to say "art isn't resistance" and also personally insulting considering I have family members and friends who were journalists, creative writers, and artists and killed/targeted for their work.

Here's this article by Fargo Tbahkhi about the role of writing during a genocide that might be a good read. They also mention how Israeli propaganda (calling Palestinians "human animals"/"Amalek" as an example) is specifically a use of culture and writing to energize people to commit genocide. An especially poignant part that I completely agree with, and am trying to get at:

Palestine requires that we abandon this catharsis. Nobody should get out of our work feeling purged, clean. Nobody should live happily during the war. Our readers can feel that way when liberation is the precondition for our work, and not the dream. When it is the place we stand, and not the place we shake ourselves towards. In this way, what the long middle of revolution requires, what Palestine requires, is an approach to writing whose primary purpose is to gather others up with us, to generate within them an energy which their bodies cannot translate into anything but revolutionary movement. This is what Boal modeled for us in his theatrical experiments, which were dedicated to empowering audiences to act, to participate in a creative struggle to envision and embody alternatives. For Boal, theater was not revolution, but it was a rehearsal for the revolution, meant to gather communities together in that rehearsal. Creative work readies us for material work, by offering a space to try out strategies, think through contradictions, remind us of our own agency.

#palestine

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gracefall-mcyt · 2 months

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...SO. Hermitcraft Lifeline AU trailer I made for a class last semester.

Does contain spoilers but they're left vague-ish? Vague enough that I don't think it spoils the experience at all. Go read SlashMagpie's Lifeline AU. Please.

Now crossposted to Youtube!

Notes about stuff under the cut :)

Okay so. I know there are some inaccuracies to the actual fic, major and minor alike. However, this took me around 60 hours to make, and I wasn't able to work on anything else in between because of my deadline. I am not going back to fix things now. I spent the entire latter half of my winter break pretty much just working on this, because, like I said, I was doing it for an assignment.

It was a film studies class, and we had to create a pretend cult classic and then create some creative representation of it. I chose to do an adaptation of Lifeline AU for mine! That's why there are the black frames near the start–originally there was some pretty typical movie trailer text, I just didn't feel like including it here.

I'm going to be real, I would not have been able to get through that project if I wasn't doing it with LLAU. Lifeline AU was my lifeline, in a way. If I had stuck with my original plan, then I wouldn't have come up with such a GOOD final product. I probably would have quit the trailer and settled for a poster. With this, that never crossed my mind. I wound up with a product that I had genuine creative passion for, based on a story that I have immense love for.

@slashmagpie , thank you so much for writing this fic. I have said it before and I will say it again; this is my favourite thing I have ever read. Between its plot, characterization, worldbuilding... EVERYTHING. It's such a beautiful story. It's one of few works to actually make me think, to make me consider what's right and wrong, in a sense. Every time I reread it, even if it's just a small little section (or all of Asking for a Miracle. I'd say that that one has the biggest chokehold on me of the llau fics), I feel myself experiencing the fic all over again.

Going to be honest, I wasn't going into LLAU with any expectations. I found Lost Boys bc i was looking for fics with aliens, and so i decided Empty Oceans would be my "last fic before sleep." I ended up not sleeping that night, spending the next few hours reading through all of the series (aside from Twenty-Eight Days of Delirium, but I did go back to that one later that day), listening to the same song on loop the entire time. I was so engrossed by the story I didn't even notice until I was halfway through Asking for a Miracle.

I rambled on about the fic to anyone who would listen. My best friend, my cousin, my younger brothers, my older sibling, everyone. Eventually, when one day my cousin came over to have a sleepover, I was like. I know you're not going to read it. Would you like me to tell it to you? And she said yes. I expected it to take maybe a half hour. She expected it to take one hour. It ended up taking two and a half. By the end, she said "this sounds like it would make a great movie", so we ended up writing out the script for the very trailer you see above.

My cousin is actually the one who drew the beautiful clock seen at the beginning and on the monks' robes! She gave me permission to use it. I would tag her, but she doesn't have any public social media accounts.

At some point I'll come back and list all the small details, bc I put in quite a few, but for now I'm tired of typing up this post so you'll have to wait :)

Song used is Imaginary Worlds by Tyler K

I forgot where exactly I got the clock ticking sound effect but I will try to find it and link it eventually.

As stated before, this is entirely based on Lifeline AU by SlashMagpie. Go read it if you haven't already, I'm begging you.

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ultfreakme · 2 months

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Nah Zutara is def happening. Two of the writers (Omashu and Into the Dark) are Zutara shippers and liking Zutara content all the time esp about Kiawentiio and Dallas. The Netflix accounts are pushing Zutara like crazy. Albert Kim is an enemies to lovers enthusiast and said that the original endgame ships are up in the air.

I am trying so very hard to be objective about this and so I am going to tell you what I'm seeing in the nicest way possible but I'm really sorry if I can't:

I've checked the official Netflix account, I follow it on twitter, nothing afaik. The closest I found was picture sets but they did it for Dallas and Gordon, Dallas and Ian, Elizabeth Yu and Kiawentiio too, and obviously Gordon and Kiawentiio, all the duos. There's a video clip of Kiawentiio throwing out a question card about if Katara likes Zuko and their first immediate reaction is laughing (and not in a way that's confirming it- like Dallas was about to clap and Ian gave a thumbs-up, not encouraging and they conclude it with saying a lukewarm 'no kinda well' likely because it's spoilers for season 3).

youtube

Kiawentiio right after an interviewer mentioned Zutara, she said and I quote ; "What Avatar are you watching?"

Albert Kim on Kataang:

It's being delayed to S2 because the age difference looks way too obvious in live action. It's still happening, just later when the actors look closer in age. They heavily hint towards future Kataang by comparing Aang and Katara to Tui and La on-screen (Yue saying the ocean will forever search for its counterpart while panning between Aang and Katara whos is reaching out for him, and Sokka and Yue where Sokka's begging Yue to stay- it's very on-the nose).

The OG show also had creatives who like Zutara, they inserted bait for it in the chibi shorts but nothing came of it in any canon and everything is steadfastly for Kataang. Heck, currently the cast are pushing Zukka all the time, doesn't mean it's going to be canon(Dallas Liu and Ian Ousley saying "hey ship our characters!" word-for-word does not equal Zuko and Sokka are going to date for real in the show).

It's disappointing that fanon ships aren't canon, but that's just what you sign up for when shipping fanon. You are not going to to get what you want, neither am I.

Kataang is the heart of the show, nothing will take that away and I think it's best to just, make peace with that instead of looking too hard into behind-the-scenes and cast stuff hoping THIS is when it's going to happen(I play along with the Zukka bait because it's funny, not because I think it's going to be real).

Also, writers liking Zutara content? Fine, do you, have a blast! It DOES get weird when they're sincerely promoting Dallas and Kiawentiio as an item though because they met when she was like 15 and he was 19/20, and now she's 17 while he's 22 now. She's a child, he's an adult pretty much their entire work relationship. That's really freaking weird. EDIT: Dallas and Ian, who are the actual adults in the cast have been actively redirecting all ship-related conversations towards themselves and their characters because they CAN handle whatever flame wars erupt from that, meanwhile Gordon and Kiawentiio are children so they shouldn't even be in the discussion as actors when it comes to the fictional ships.

#natla #atla la #riki asks #kataang #atla netflix #netflix atla

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punkitt-is-here · 1 year

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Could I ask about dealing with anxiety when starting to make games? Also I hope your day is going well when you get this

Sure!

I think the most important thing to learn about, as with any new skill or tool or what have you, is that you have to get cool with sucking. I didn't get this far in being a fun gamedev internet person by caring immensely about the perfect quality of what i put out; i was just proud to do it! If I cared about getting everything right the first go around i'd never get ANYTHING done. Underneath all the neat stuff I show online is actually a mountain of things that I would call subpar or even failures, but I don't mind having those at all; they're important steps in the creative process! And I think being bad at something is better than not doing something at all. And I'll say this much: in gamedev, even the tiniest, most insignificant victories feel like GIGANTIC wins when you're dealing with something as fickle and intimidating as gamedev, and those victories are what motivate me. The second you get far enough to have your own lil guy walking around in your own little world is the moment when everything starts to click for me and i go "boy i fucking love gamedev so much". it's tough, but i think when you hold out long enough to start seeing even the tiniest little fruits of your labor you'll see why it's such a rewarding experience.

Secondly, recognize that you're doing this for fun!! If you're going into ANY medium with the goal just to earn money or make the next big hit, I think you're gonna hit a roadblock pretty quickly. Make things because YOU wanna make them, and you'll find the anxiety washes away pretty quickly. Don't make things because it's hot right now to make uhhhh i dunno Among Us Roguelikes with FPS elements or something, do it because you have an idea that sounds fuckin sick and you wanna make it real. It's 100% why i make ANYTHING i make at all.

Additionally, cheat!! Use shortcuts!!! All the gamedev stuff I've shown is actually made off of engines that require little-to-no programming experience (SMBX2 and RPGMaker 2003) and while I eventually want to move on to stuff like Godot, I think it's INCREDIBLY fun and rewarding to work with engines that do a lot of the initial ground work for you. I don't think there's anything wrong with using engines that'll get you quicker to where you wanna be as long as its something you feel like you can get behind. So have fun with it, be ready to be bad (and that's okay!) and take it easy on yourself.

Hope you have a wonderful day! I am :>

#my posts #asks #gamedev #blender-chan

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ao3commentoftheday · 2 years

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i find myself lately frustrated with my writing; it feels like nothing i am producing is right....im not liking any of it, and its frustrating and sad because i used to really like it but dont know where stuff went wrong. im trying to take a break but its hard because trying to fill the times where im usually writing with something else makes me feel empty :/

I'm sorry you're going through all of this, anon. This feels like a lot to deal with.

In a situation like this, it can be helpful to look at each piece of the puzzle and see which one you're able to deal with right now and which ones you'll need to come back to later when you're up to it.

You're frustrated because it feels like nothing you're creating is right. The key here is figuring out what's wrong with it. Is it a story that you're not interested in anymore? Is there a plot point that you wrote out that you don't like anymore but it feels like a lot of work to go back and revise the story to take it out? Are characters feeling "off" in some way? Does it feel like it's missing something and you can't figure out what? Depending on your answers, the way to resolve this might be putting the story aside. But it might also be abandoning the story altogether or gutting it fairly significantly in order to keep the parts that you do like in order to get rid of the stuff that you don't.

You used to like it and you don't know where it went wrong. It might be that plot point issue I mentioned above, or it could be another factor. How are you feeling about the fandom in general? About your life external to fandom? Unhappiness in other areas of our lives can cause frustration in the places where we used to find happiness. Are you feeling sadness, frustration, and discontent about other things you used to enjoy? Do you have stresses in your life that might be affecting you? This one might require you to talk to someone about what's going on.

You're trying to take a break but it's hard. Fandom is a wonderful community full of joy and giving. But it's also a community where we can sometimes pressure ourselves too much. Sometimes taking a break can feel like you'll lose your audience - like they'll forget you when you're gone. Sometimes taking a break can make you feel guilty because all you can think about are the people who are waiting on the next story or the next chapter. When you're tired and frustrated and sad, you need to stop thinking about others and start focusing on yourself. There's no shame in needing a rest. Everyone does sometimes. And as for losing your audience, a lot of them will still be there when you return and the ones who left might be replaced by new people who will just be discovering your art.

You feel empty when you're not writing, so you can't think of another way to fill your time. What parts of writing fill you up? What about it gives you energy or inspiration or happiness? Is it the moments where you're imagining? The moments when you're crafting sentences? Is it the moments when you're talking to a friend about the next plot point or cackling over how people will react to your cliffhanger? Is it seeing kudos and comments come into your inbox? Seeing your fic get talked about on tumblr? Depending on what parts of writing satisfy a need inside of you, the way you fill that time will differ. If you need the creative outlet, doing something else creative like painting or baking or gardening etc. might help. If it's the parts surrounding friendships, then spending time doing things with people you care about might help. If it's about the attention you get from your fellow fans, look into some kind of performance outlet - either in person or via social media. Figure out what you need first and it'll be that much easier to get it.

You might only have to look at one of these items. You might need to consider them all. Either way, you can't really solve the problem until you figure out what it actually is.

It's been a long time since you sent this in, anon, and i'm so sorry for the delay. I hope you're in a better mental place now and that you're found your way to whatever your next joyful moment might be.

#asks and answers #long post

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yonpote · 9 days

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sorry i dont have anyone to talk to this about lol so it's going in your inbox but i'm in my mid-20s and only now for the first time in my life have i changed my mind on rpf specifically because of phanfic. i'm a returning phannie but like.... the last time i watched them was all the way back in 2012. and was very ani-rpf then and have continued to be through the years. and i think in a lot of cases i maintain that position. but after falling back in love with dnp and the phandom and caving into the urge to read some phanfic knowing that dnp themselves encourage and respect it im kind of shocked to find it's actually a really beautiful, metatextual, interactive creative outlet. i think youve talked a bit about how phanfic isnt really rpf to you and i kind of agree, because dan and phil to me are like.... an idea, a mythology, a narrative, that theyre aware of and have built as well as being aware that we're aware of. like the idea of dan and phil has been constructed by them and their fans hand in hand for over a decade. and i find that phanfic itself is very aware of this and exists to expand upon those ideas. lol. yeah that's it sorry for this ramble. i just find it surprising that something could change my mind on that in this day and age but it's been a very cool experience.

hello welcome youve come to the right place for this yap because i COMPLETELY understand you. like genuinely i am not this attached to any other "rpf" content like this? ok i had an egobang phase but honestly arin and danny have grown to share a similar but not exact same connection as dnp BUT I DIGRESS

but yeah i think a lot of it is due to the contrastive relationships between the brand of Dan and Phil™, their separate individual brands Daniel Howell and AmazingPhil (particularly dan), the Phanon dnp, and the actual real people dan and phil. i always go back to the fanfiction segment of tatinof but its just such a perfect example of what i mean. like, the entire idea to have a fanfic scene was ofc the real people's idea, and they used tropes they would see in the phanon to convey the audience interactive story, but at the same time had to keep it at least Somewhat appropriate for the Brand™ at the time being very pre-teen and teen focused. honestly idk how much you've gone back and watched of what you missed, but i would suggest doing that not just cuz theres some incredible stuff from those eras, but also seeing the intersection of the brand, fanon, and real people and when they split apart. you see it a lot especially in gaming videos imo where theyre unscripted, and once they got more comfortable in the gaming channel roles the energy shifting away from Brand but never too far... until ofc now where what even is their brand anymore just Chaos and Queerness i guess

OH ALSO go read some old fic and compare to newer ones like its not just that writing styles changed or that dnp themselves have changed, but the like. energy and intent put into fic has changed. i would say in the past it was more exploratory, putting dnp in AU's and imagines, or exploring what Could have happened. whereas now, yes ofc there are au's and fic for the purpose of exploring a concept or world, but also its a lot more introspective. exploring the inner world a bit more. idk i just thijk dnp are funny lil guys and they accidentally created some freaky lil creatures in a lab somewhere...

#the brand #phan #myrambles #i feel like i have other tags i could give this idk

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777rare · 1 year

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☀️SUNSHINE ASTEROID - 3742💫

Disclaimer:

I DO NOT PLAGIARIZE, COPY OR REWORD ANY OF MY FELLOW ASTROLOGY OBSERVERS POSTS AND I DEMAND THE SAME IN RETURN

Today we'll be talking about asteroid ☀️SUNSHINE~

This asteroid helps you learn the ways to overcome your seasonal depression by checking the sign,house, and degree in which it is placed along with checking the aspects its making with planets and where the aspected planets are seated to see what you could do to make yourself happy.

I'm using my sunshine placement as an example for your better understanding. Here we go!💫🙌🏻

I have sunshine in aquarius at 16° in the 11th house. The asteroid aspects are

Conjunct neptune in 11th house

Conjunct chiron in 11th house

Opposition saturn in 5th house

Sextile jupiter in 9th house

Okay, let's go with the placements :-

Sunshine in aquarius and 11th house could mean making friends, surfing online to distract myself, also maybe watching movies, Netflix, Amazon prime your phone, tab, computer, or even TV . Anything techno can help amazingly😉

Sunshine at 16° (cancer degree) - this could mean cooking, cleaning my house space and baking can help me. Also I'm getting you know, having a nice bubble bath in the tub, just playing with water or taking a nice shower bath

now let's go with the aspects :-

#3742 is sextile jupiter. Learning and travelling can really help me freshen up. Even exploring new things can help me forget old stuff from bothering me, making me feel better or occupied. This also adds on cuz my jupiter is in 9th house

#3742 opposition saturn. Okay, this can be a bit confusing. Saturn has got to do with authority, strictness, limitations and My saturn is in the 5th house. Sunshine- saturn says that I would probably need to stop stressing/being tensed about everything and freshen up. Like I said before, The house ur planet is in also depends on the result so I might need to freshen up and do something creative(5th house), like this can also be about entertainment and self-expression. Again here, I need to watch happy, comedy movies or even movies/shows meant for kids or the ones I watched when I was a child. Also maybe Journaling, writing my feelings down in a diary can help.

#3742 conjunct neptune. Involving myself into spiritual activities, exploring about the occult world can really heal me. Anything spiritual like reiki,tarot,aura reading and cleansing, crystals,astrology,runes,witchcraft can help me heal when I learn about them.

#3742 conjunct chiron. I have a strong feeling that getting into shadow work will help me so so much because chiron is the wounded healer and shadow work is all about connecting with the dark part of yourself. It's just like the right piece to my puzzle. Getting into shadow work will help me so much because shadow work is meant for healing and connecting with your dark side.

Hope you all enjoyed reading this post!💓 Feel free to reblog and tag me when you do🫂❤

Have a great day ahead!🏝

PS : thankyou so much for the support I have been receiving recently. i am so grateful to my dear readers. Love you all!💘😽

#spiritualawakening #spirituality #spiritual enlightenment #witch community #astrology notes #astro community #astroblr #witchery #witchy #blessings #Natal chart #Astrology observations #astrology #astro placements #astro notes #astroworld

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blingblong55 · 8 months

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grim stalks people

But not like a stalker

Like a dog

They slowly approach, and then lunge at the person

If it's one of their military family members, it turns into a playfight sesh

If it's a random soldier, you have either fucked up so bad God shall'nt help you, or grim thinks your cool

Grim can paint nails and do them very well, so much so it's gotten to the point the women and men in the same area/base as grim will just ask grim to do their nails rather then go to a salon.

Mainly because grim can do it better and it's way cheaper, all the person has to do is buy grim McDonald's

Grim has bitten könig, ghost, and soaps ass before

grim has a stash of weed, weed edibles, bongs, blunts, and so much more. They have the good shit too

(Optional)

Grim once wore tight leggings around the base and realized they have unintentional God-level rizz

Grim also likes to wear tight mens boxers around base

Grim has gotten insecure about their belly pudge and generally thickness (I am a chubby bunny so I believe grim to be as well)

The boys didn't like that

So they took a peice from grims book, and bit their thighs and stomach.

It worked wonders, but grim was horny the whole day

barracks bunny!Grim??????????? think of the potentials here!!!

Grim probably has a tiktok account where they post a 'my clients nails and their career' content. People praise Grim left and right about their nails so much Grim has a side hustle. Now I believe in America weed is legal but here in the UK it's not so let's pretend Grim is American for this part.

Grim is the GOD/GODDESS of giving people weed, the way they are so creative with it is what makes it be under the radar. 420 is the day no one on base works because Grim distributed that good stuff early in the morning as 'presents'.

Anyway back to horny Grim, they are probably rubbing up against pillows like an animal in heat because the only time they are a little shy about themselves is when they are horny. At times they aren't though! What gets Grim to get any sort of pleasure is at times loudly complain to Gaz or Soap about their body and they smile like a villain with a good plan after their body is littered with bite marks. its just so good it wake up the masochist in them

#cod mw2 #cod x grim #cod x gn!reader #ghost x grim #soap x grim #gaz x grim #gaz x reader #task force 141 #ghost cod #141 x reader

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brian-in-finance · 4 months

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Jamie Dornan in ‘The Fall’ / HELEN SLOANE/NETFLIX

Jamie Dornan reveals Fifty Shades fame led to a 'stalker-type' situation

"The more I can block that out, the better it is for me and family," he said.

Though he generally manages to fly under the radar, Jamie Dornan has had to deal with a potentially dangerous fan in the past.

Dornan, 41, rose to international fame when he played billionaire-with-specific-sexual-tastes Christian Grey in the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy. And while the films opened some doors for him, they also put him in the path of some unhinged fans.

While speaking with British paper The Independent, Dornan revealed that the fame and rumors surrounding the franchise led to a disturbing encounter. “I’ve been involved in situations where it’s impacted my family," he said.

I had a situation... a stalker-type situation before Covid. That was f-ing scary. Someone turned up at my house when my kids were there. It was not something... The more I can block that out, the better it is for me and the family.

Dornan also addressed ongoing conspiracy theories that he and Grey costar Dakota Johnson have a secret relationship and family (in reality, Dornan has been married to Amelia Warner since 2013, with whom he shares three children).

I tried to put walls up around [the fans], to really try and not let that in. I’m pretty good at just blocking any of the noise associated with whatever fandom is – not letting it affect me, or more importantly my family.

Jamie Dornan in 'Fifty Shades Freed’ / EVERETT COLLECTION

His time in the Fifty Shades franchise was marked by boffo box office combined with behind-the-scenes strife, largely due to author E.L. James' differing creative vision from original director Sam Taylor-Johnson. But Dornan also revealed that his past history as a model meant he was often only considered for romantic heroes like Christian Grey in his early days as an actor.

“All I’d ever get to audition for was, you know, ‘the count who comes in on a f-ing horse and ravages the woman’,” he remembered. “I’d come from modeling, so I thought those were the only types of roles I was going to do."

The opposite has proved true with Dornan playing everything from a serial killer on The Fall to a lovestruck himbo in Barb and Star Go to Vista Del Mar to a dad fighting to keep his family together during the Irish "troubles" in Belfast. He's hoping to avoid projects that might bring him the level of notoriety of Fifty Shades in the future.

Jamie in ‘Barb and Star Go To Vista Del Mar’ / CATE CAMERON/THE CW

"There’s never going to be anything like Fifty Shades again," he said. "It felt very much like its own thing, particularly because it focused in and around sex. But there are obviously other jobs that bring insane scrutiny, like superhero stuff, or f--ing James Bond – any of that stuff. I’ve done pretty well to avoid that sort of s-- so far."

Though he also doesn't rule out the possibility of finding himself in a project of that nature at some point. “I think if you’re an actor of a certain standing, who has a certain sort of recognition, you’re going to be in those conversations,” he noted. "I’m not saying I’d never do anything super high-profile again, or a big [intellectual property] with all eyes on it. I probably will. But I’m also really happy with where I’m at right now."

"I can live a pretty normal life for the most part," he concluded. "I can sit on the Tube and I’m fine. I’m an ambitious person, and I have a fire under me, but in the last 10 years or so, I’ve realized I don’t want big peaks all the time. That doesn’t interest me. I’m happy to keep ticking over as I am, then one day just disappear and play golf for the rest of my life."

Jamie in ‘Belfast’ / ROB YOUNGSON/FOCUS FEATURES

Remember how the Belfast stars probably compared notes?

#Tait rhymes with hat #Good times #EW #31 December 2023 #Stalking #Fan delusions #Thanks sunsetmagic85

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vyl3tpwny · 2 years

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ANTONYMPH (and the things that made it)

art by @voreburger

—

It has been one year since I released Antonymph. This song seriously changed my life and, it would seem, the lives of many others. I am grateful for the apparent impact it has had on people and I'm hopeful that the reach of its message will continue to spread.

I wanted to talk about how we got here.

Between the months of November 2020 and July of 2021, I experienced a gauntlet of emotional trauma, hardship, and declining physical & mental health. These things came after being newly out as trans, kicked out of my home by my family, transitioning from being a college student to a totally independent adult within the span of a month or two, moving away from my home of 21 years to somewhere I've never been before, and then trying to balance all this with the onset of COVID around the world. In January of 2021, all of these things adding up and weighing on me led me into this rabbit hole of thoughts about my life in the past, present, and future. Namely, though, I thought about my home in San Francisco, where I was far away now. I thought about the memories and things that made me who I was up until that point, especially the bad stuff. The whole project of CUTIEMARKS was an analysis of my life's mental struggles throughout my childhood and budding adulthood, examined through the characters of MLP:FiM.

And you know, it wasn't all everyone and everything else. Growing up, I had felt inclined to be a lot of negative forces myself. To be honest, I'm not precisely sure where it came from, and though I'm glad I grew from it, I still used to be that way. When considering a lot of the things of my past I encountered two things that would eventually become the hallmark reasons for creating Antonymph:

I was a dick to people. In so many ways, I was just an asshole for a lot of my life. I still kind of am sometimes, but I think everyone is. I really mean I was a cunt. This overinflated ego, this desire to shut people down for what they liked, this idea that I was always right and I know best about everything. I acted on this a lot and hurt a lot of people, even my closest friends (many of whom are still around me today, and I'm endlessly thankful they stuck with me through my worst).

I was also made to feel the same way, both directly and indirectly. I talked a lot about how it felt like there was pressure from the people closest to me to only like certain things and other things are not good enough to be enjoyed. This comes especially in the case of music, where it felt like there was a lot of disdain around me for pop and non-traditional music. This extended to all types of media though. I wouldn't have been caught dead being perceived as enjoying something like My Little Pony for a while.

So conceptually speaking, my desire to write something like Antonymph came as a rebellion against these things; against the ways I treated people and the ways I was treated.

At this point of my life, I had also recognized this sort of perpetual depression and negativity that pervaded me at all times. Any type of positive emotion would either be subdued or otherwise disappear within moments. It felt like I couldn't love things and I was always just clenching my shoulders preparing for things to hurt all the time.

So, back to January 2021. Sophie Xeon, a musician who I looked up to and felt comfort in, has just died. Very few celebrity deaths have ever affected me, but this one was very personal and intense. I remember going to bed shaking and feeling sick. It was an uneasiness I'll always be able to picture vividly in my head. In the spirit of her unabashed creativity and love for everything, I started conceptualizing a project that would be as bold as I felt she was.

The first, and only, title for this project was "CUTIEMARKS (and the things that bind us)".

A deep dive into SOPHIE's work and her peers' work led me to examine the inspirations for PC Music. From there I rediscovered my love for the dancepop of the late 2000's and early 2010's. Carly Rae Jepson, Kesha, Katy Perry, etc. Around the time I started really using the internet, I secretly loved this music even though it felt like I was going against everything I was supposed to stand for at the time. I grew up in a cishet, Christian, potentially elitist music space. Things that evoked anything other than that induced guilt to enjoy. But I very, very, secretly, quietly, loved that stuff.

So I decided to make some synth patches that evoked those feelings

That's what led to this:

Once this demo was made, the path became rather clear for what I wanted to do. Around the time of the songs that inspired it, I was getting really into Tumblr and all the glittery, kitschy parts of the internet. I had been talking a lot with @voreburger (Pico) at the time of this and had a feeling he would be super into the idea. It started out as just wanting to have Fluttershy coming out of her shell with the help of internet culture. It was after pitching this idea to Pico that he sent me back a rough draft:

The idea was really coming together it seemed. What really drove it was his use of the Gir hoodie, really solidifying the internet time period(s) we were after. The Nintendo DS, the browser extension toolbars, and all that; he was onto something incredible.

By the second draft, I still only had "Antonymph (demo1)" made on my end. Taking inspiration from the art he was doing, I started writing lyrics and programming some drums:

After I had these additions to ground the idea, I started getting more ideas for the art direction of the song.

By this point I want people to understand how much Pico was instrumental to the conceptualizing and execution of this whole project. We bounced so many ideas off of each other and worked to string everything together. It wasn't a case of me commissioning him for a few things and calling it a day, it really wouldn't exist the way it does without him.

In order to test chroma key stuff, he sent this icon that he made.

It was here that I realized that Antonymph could be something bigger. There was now a few pieces of "Fluttershy in a gir onesie" that could be used for a semi-animated music video. I said to Pico the words "we'll create an entire culture around one song". That was essentially the manifesto, how deep I wanted this whole thing to go.

So I got to work. (This also appears to be the first mention of "Fluttgirshy" in our DM's)

youtube

I ran the lyrics by Pico in a group chat and we talked about the lyrical direction of the song. After coming up with some stuff together we ended up with demo3:

Between March, 2021 - May, 2021, I took time off from the Antonymph studio sessions for a few reasons:

The visual aspect of the project was now in full effect. I was messaging many of my favourite mutual artists and pitching Antonymph to them and explaining what I needed.

Focusing otherwise on lyrics.

I was working on the other CUTIEMARKS songs, now that the album was no longer a small EP project (which it was originally intended to be, as it always ends up with my music).

It was intimidating to work on Antonymph. It was very clear by this point that it was going to be a big project and a big song, likely to be heard by a lot of people. We all expected this from the start, though it ended up being even more than we imagined. Still, knowing this made it harder to work on the song because the pressure was really on.

Now at this point, many other concepts have been injected into the idea of Antonymph too:

Queerness needed to be a big part of this. Making a song about self acceptance and expression had to entail queerness (like many other aspects of CUTIEMARKS, anyway).

I wanted to help heal my homesickness a little bit, so the music video would start to include video clips that I took in California (most notably, the intro of the music video shows my BART route from San Francisco to Daly City).

I wanted my friends to be a part of it in some way. I couldn't include everyone, but I did a lot to make sure that the people I cared most about would be included in this project, knowing it would be seen by lots of people. I wanted to bring them along for this whole thing. Lots of clips in the music video include videos of my friends, and I took lots of suggestions about the song from friends in servers and group chats.

As a spiritual sequel to "Lesbian Ponies With Weapons", I wanted the song to speak to a lot of the issues our generation is facing around the world especially in the wake of civil rights and economic inequity.

Between May 17, 2021 - May 27, 2021 there were two more Antonymph demos:

After demo4, I asked friends and patreon subscribers if they wanted to be included in the song by way of putting a group of everyone saying "hell yeah" in the second verse. demo5 is where this first is implemented, but all the voices wouldn't be included until the very final version of the song.

art by @sterfler / @uzon

Slowly but surely, everything came together. I worked endlessly on coordinating all the art stuff and doing the video editing and graphic design, until eventually:

It was done. February 24, 2021 - May 28, 2021.

I don't usually talk about finances, but I know for certain that the Antonymph project itself had costed well over $1.5k to make. This is disregarding everything else I had invested into the creation of the CUTIEMARKS album entirely, and is limited purely to Antonymph by itself. And as this project has helped to grow myself as a musician, I should be able to make more projects of this scope in the future.

A few days later, I premiered the trailer for it on June 4, 2021:

youtube

And then of course, what followed was the music video itself.

youtube

And just like that, it felt like I had taken my first breath of fresh air in a long time. I braced for the response to this, and what followed was extraordinary. Across social media, the #antonymph and #fluttgirshy tags were filling with people making fanart of the interpretation of Fluttershy that Pico and I, along with the many other incredible artists, spent many months getting just right. It all went to even inspire the parody project on SiIvaGunner's channel:

youtube

Antonymph was born from the ashes of my trauma and memories, and was forged between me and a dedicated team of incredible visionaries to become this thing that a lot of people connect with now. If I was going to put out a project of this scope and reach, I wanted to make sure it was positive and inspiring, and had the potential to live past its release as something that would continue to influence people for the foreseeable future.

So, Antonymph feels like a HUGE explosion of colours and emotions. And that's because it is. Everything had mounted up to that point. Endless amounts of hardship and mistakes, culminating into something that would be unabashedly beautiful.

I am forever grateful.

Thank you so much. + Thank you so much to Pico for making this project one of the best ever.

Oh, and as an extra special thank you, the stems to ANTONYMPH are now freely available to everyone: https://we.tl/t-j7WJ9dQ6tT

art by @astroeden, made specially for the one year anniversary of Antonymph <3

#vylop #vyletpony #vylet pony #my little pony #mlp #fim #friendship is magic #fluttershy #fluttgirshy #antonymph #cutiemarks #Youtube

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devilscreekballad · 1 year

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Help the author get their life back on track

Hello everyone.

As you likely know, I am not in a good position right now. I talked about how I lack the bare necessities in my apartment and how that is taking its toll on my mental energy, which in turn has a devastating effect on my creative stuff.

The situation is thus:

I am without a job and can't get one either due to various frustrating factors, health being one of them, another being living at... not the ass of the world, but if you head towards to light at the end of the tunnel that would be where you'd end up.

Anyway, my financial situation is dire. You people helped a lot in the past and got me out of some tight spots, but unfortunately the worst bits remain:

My teeth, and my apartment.

I talked about my teeth, so here's the issue with my apartment: It is -nice-, don't get me wrong, but it isn't a home yet, due to never having been able to get furniture (new or second hand) to store away everything proper.

For the past 13 years I've been living out of laundry baskets, moving stuff from one surface to the next if i needed one of them, and not being able to cook when I did laundry, cause the only space to dry my stuff is in the kitchen, in an are so small I can't even dry one load of laundry in one go, but have to wait about 2-3 days till everything's dry.

All of that is really getting me down. I feel pathetic and helpless, and I just can't do it anymore.

So, I am asking for help.

My k0fi is here:

Click Me For Coffee

Below is stuff I need to make my apartment a home and get myself back on track:

tumbledryer and new washing machine

wardrobe/closet (this has to be customemade (IKEA) due to my bedroom being cut very unfortunate and not being able to fit most off the shelf closests)

kitchen and livingroom shelves

fridge (I'm decently certain mine is close to going BOOM...)

potentially a new stove (same situation as the fridge)

Worst bit is, all of the above is still cheaper than getting all my teeth fixed, and I hate everything about that.

Sorry to be like this. Please, if you can help, do, I want to get back to writing without my brain noping out because we can't dry laundry while cooking.

Sorry

#not baodc #baodc ramble

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sweet-coffee-milk-tea · 15 days

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I Need Genuine Help

Don’t worry it’s not that serious but still serious enough to me.

I’ll probably not get a response, this is my most active account online and that’s saying something.

I am going to go trigger happy with tags just to get this post out there so I apologize in advance!

Respond to this send me an ask reblog I don’t care just help me lol.

I don’t know what to do I have to many ideas and no one in my life to help me.

No it’s not mental health and no it’s not that I don’t have anyone I just don’t have anyone who will know how to help me with this.

I am overwhelmed with so many ideas so many stories I want to create in so many different mediums and my brain won’t let me choose one.

I don’t even have a hyperfixation that I can lean on right now to get going with like fanfiction/art.

So I’m stuck in a limbo bursting with creativity but no outlet.

There is another issue

I am exhausted after work and rather let my ideas whirring around in my skull things on easy mode while I watch shows that bring me up.

But that’s not creative, it’s gotten to the point that jotting down my ideas aren’t enough I need to do something.

But everyone I know will tell me to go the capitalist route and pick the one that can make you money the soonest even if it’s not what I am enjoying most at the moment.

But I can’t do it, call it undiagnosed adhd/autism or me being stubborn as fuck but I want to enjoy what I do I am incapable of starting anything if I don’t enjoy it so this is where you all come in.

Help me pick?

What is my limited range of people who can hear my voice interested in the most?

I am going to be doing all of these I am unable to keep away from all my ideas

My issue is taking the first step I would appreciate my audience/community to say what they want to see out of the choices I want to pick so at the very least I will have like one person interacting with my stuff.

So this 31 year old gayby is asking for help thank you for your time!

Love you all out there!

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mithrifer · 6 months

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Okay this is that big HB S2 E7 post I promised yesterday!

Well, I'm saying big but like idk how long it'll end up being, I just plan on dumping everything inside my brain here. (should I have used another pic? dunno lol). Please excuse me if this is hard to read/is incoherent, I'm just rambling all of my thoughts out. I hope it makes sense at the end.

Where to start, where to start... I suppose I can start with Fizzy, he's kind of the connection point for Asmodeus, Mammon and all of their extra messy relationships. Which I want to dig right into!

So, Fizzarolli huh?

Now, I think Fizzarolli is downright adorable; which was only accentuated due to me watching episode 6 and 7 together, I had just found out not one but two episodes came out yesterday. I think I got some sort of fluff overdose because I told my friends something totally deranged after I was done, from which a surprisingly insightful conversation started, and I just had to share what I came up with there.

In this episode especially, though also a little in episode 6, Fizzy is just all over the place. And I mean that in the personal way. He's like a rollercoaster of emotions, diving into anxiety and doubt them surging into confidence and joy. Just a mess, really. I love him for that.

But well, from the reception I've seen of this episode, and this is purely anecdotal I am not some Helluva fandom expert, it seems like people think all of his stuff is just... resolved? Like the biggest danger people talk about is the future revenge Mammon is going to inflict upon our cute yaoi couple, or whatever!

I sure hope not! Because the way I see it, nothing about Fizzarolli's situation can be defined as "over".

So, Mammon is Fizzy's idol. He has been since the imp was five, he took him in when Fizz was at his most vulnerable, he built him into a giant sensation, he's the reason he knows Asmodeus at all, and Fizz still greatly cared about his thoughts and wanted to be "perfect" for him; the imp being keenly aware of all of this... All until Ozzy and he had a little prance around the dress room, and then Fizz made a really cool show all about how much his boss sucked and how he quit, then they all lived happily ever after.

Let's acknowledge the elephant in the room. Or rather the rooster.

Fizzarolli and Asmodeus' relationship is kind of sus when you think about it, isn't it?

I think this has been a thing ever since Ozzy was first introduced, but it was made especially clear to me during these last two episodes. So, what do you think of when you see the two interact? That they love each other very much?

Well, yeah! They do.

Okay then Mith, why did you take your time to point this out? Where's the sinister reveal? Does he beat our clown boy behind doors, or something?

No. But I don't think their relationship is healthy, either. I'd go so far as to say it's abusive.

The way Asmodeus and Fizzarolli deal with each other is certainly weird! More specifically, the way Asmodeus tries to handle his relationship. I doubt any of you would disagree with me if I said Asmodeus was controlling, but it goes beyond that. He is manipulative and untrusting as well.

First, let's explore the dynamics of their relationship. Asmodeus is the king of lust, one of the strongest and most influential demons in hell. He's caring, concerned and uplifting towards Fizzarolli, his boyfriend. Him, on the other hand, is a performer imp clown. A pretty famous one. Fizz is anxious and a perfectionist, but he's also upbeat, creative and also caring.

Fizzarolli, if episode 6 and 7 didn't make it evidently clear, is very dependent on others around him. Not only that, but those whom he is dependent on hold a sway over him. Whether its Asmodeus or Mammon, their words are arrows shot directly at his heart.

So it's certainly concerning when Asmodeus expresses how he doesn't want Fizz going out alone, finds himself "justified" in his beliefs twice, and also really just can't stand that other guy his poor boyfriend worries so much about!

What am I saying here, exactly? Why is Asmodeus trying to curb Fizzy's agency? Why doesn't Asmodeus trust him to make his own decisions? And why did he overstep his boundaries by going to that show?

Isn't it clear? Asmodeus loves him. He just wants the best for Fizzarolli. And that is precisely why he's abusing him. See, if Fizzarolli wasn't oh so fragile maybe he could go out on his own without being bothered, or if he could make coherent decisions that didn't involve giving himself panic attacks to please some fat asshole he wouldn't intervene behind his back, or if he could just let Asmodeus handle things everything would be just fine... Because Asmodeus can. He can and would do everything for him, and Fizz can depend on him.

I don't think he's even aware he's harming Fizz by not trusting him. I don't think someone who hated love until a few months ago, understands how to love. He only knows how he feels, and when he's with Fizz, with that smile on his face, he's happy.

I came upon this realization about their relationship right after the last scene. To get into that though...

Mammon

Asmodeus can't be that bad! I mean, just look at this guy? He doesn't even care for Fizz one bit! At least Ozzy loves him, Mammy was just using him!

You're sort of right! Asmodeus is so much better than Mammon. And Mammon is using him, which sucks! That's the part where you're right.

Mammon, does, however; very obviously care about Fizzarolli.

It shouldn't come off as that much of a surprise, I think. He spent years with him. He constantly carries two robot copies of him around with him. He is actually concerned for a moment when Fizzarolli is stressing out, even though he's mean and demanding. He loves his show, even if it's shitting on Mammon; and the list goes on.

But I don't think any character within the series is aware of that, including Mammon himself. The closest thing I can think of is Fizzarolli deluding(?) himself into thinking his idol does.

Fizz has the motivation to believe Mammon would care about him, after all. He practically saved his life, he's his idol, and he just wants him to be perfect.

But why wouldn't Mammon just be upfront about that?

Funny thing about owning things is that you don't really notice their values until you lose them. Still, you try and keep what you have. Mammon throws pageants every year, knowing full well Fizzy is going to win, even with competition. It does make a shit ton of money, sure, but there are probably better, easier, cheaper ways to promote his favorite. Why bother?

Fizz happens to come back every time. Which is great for profit.

Why did he get so mad when Fizz told him he quit? It certainly wasn't due to the crass words used. He loved that show, and begrudgingly watched even after realizing it was about him. So why? It's not like he lost out on anything. Fizz is just a clown imp. He's completely replacable...

Mammon is really greedy. He doesn't want to let go of Fizzarolli. Fizz is his. He spent way too much time and money on Fizz. He's had way too much fun with Fizz. And in the end, he's irreplacable, isn't he? Not out of any pragmatic or practical reasons, but because Mammon wants him. (read into this any way you want).

But... why does how Mammon feels about Fizz even matter? He's just reaping what he has sown. He deserves being abandoned.

You're completely right. Here is the thing though.

It isn't what Fizzarolli wants

Ummm Mithmints were you deaf or somethang? The fuck you song?

I won't beat around the bush this time, because I've already mentioned this. Asmodeus spends the entire episode trying to supplant the relationship between Fizzarolli and Mammon. He has every right to hold disdain for their incredibly toxic situation, but he goes behind his boyfriends back for this and even contacts his bestie for sabotage. So when Fizzarolli goes onto the stage ready to scream fuck you I quit (as he should) at the asshole who made him rise to fame, the asshole who was his idol from five, the asshole whom he wanted to be perfect for just minutes ago; right after an incredibly vulnerable moment where his sweet hunky boyfriend told him how he was just perfect the way he is and didn't need anything, after which they had a cute little dance.

For some reason, I don't think Fizzarolli is going to be very proud of his incredibly rash decision once the adrenaline goes down and he feels hesitation and guilt towards a deed done. If Fizzy had a rational moment to think about cutting things off with Mammon, I don't think he would pick the method he did, even with his love for performance. Because years of obsession and care don't go away with a two minute song. Don't worry though, Asmodeus will make sure he's more than happy with the path he picked.

...So?

Uh... What "so?"? Are you asking me if I was going anywhere with this? Well, definitely not anywhere specific! I kind of just wanted to examine their situations!

Okay, so, here are my direct thoughts based on what we established.

Fizzarolli loves both Asmodeus and Mammon (feel free to pick how for the latter) but he is very anxious and dependant. He makes a completely justified yet rash decision to cut Mammon off, something he will personally regret. Both of these people hurt Fizzy, but the former is a lot nicer about it.

Asmodeus loves Fizzy, and I don't think he was exaggarating when he said he was the best thing that happened to him during that scene. As a result, he cares deeply about him, and can't bear to see him get hurt. I think Asmodeus thinks that as long as Fizzy is safe and happy, everything is just fine. So he takes the initiative to keep Fizzy from harm, cut him off from assholes from his past, and even go behind his back to do these things. He doesn't trust Fizzarolli to lead his own life, but I don't think he realizes he even should. As long as he's around, Fizz can always stay with him and depend on him. As a cardinal sin, it's not like he's going anywhere. And with that other guy out of the way, Fizz doesn't have anywhere else to go to, even if he for whatever reason wanted to. (I do not think Blitzo could support Fizzarolli in such a way, don't get me wrong, he would definitely try, but I can't imagine it ending well. Their lives just contrast a little too much.)

Mammon just lost out on his favorite clown, and he's very upset about it. I don't think he can parse out why he's so bothered, exactly! It's just Fizzarolli. He just cut him off and quit. It's not like the king of greed needs a clown imp for anything. But I think he's going to feel that vacancy in his life. Like something has been removed and he just can't fill it back up. I can't imagine him being accustomed to loss with all of his avarice. I think he'll find he hates it more than anyone else could.

See Asmodeus and Mammon are like perfect opposites to each other. Asmodeus gives, and Mammon takes. Lust is two sided, while Greed just has one. They're both manipulative, but Asmodeus' nature makes him not even realize it, while Mammon revels in it. I think that's really fun.

So time to get into epic headcanon/scenario making time!

You know how Asmodeus used to think love sucked? Well, what if Mammon and Asmodeus were exes? See, Mammodeus (especially before and without Fizz) would be a complete disaster. The previous opposition would just completely drain Asmodeus as a person, while Mammon would grow spoiled and unsatisfied. I think it would be pretty traumatizing. But I can't really stop thinking about a post-Fizz version of it, maybe set sometime after canon in a universe where Fizz elects to dump Ozzy after noticing his agency being taken away. instead of reconciling with him. I think it would start out as hatesex disaster, but it would quickly evolve into something more substantial. I think Asmodeus would be able to build something great there, having learned how to be a better lover from Fizz.

To be honest any of the pairings or a throupling has massive potential with these three characters. I'm also a big Flitz(?) fan so it was good to see all the scenes between them too. But maybe that's a post for another day.

Feel free to tell me in the comments or reblogs how hard my takes suck and how fizzaozzy or fizzmodeus is 100% healthy. If you can convince me you get a gold star and a big kiss on the cheek!

#helluva boss #helluva fizzarolli #helluva asmodeus #helluva mammon #fizzarolli #asmodeus #mammon #fizzarozzie #fizzmodeus #mammorolli #mammodeus #i think im the first tagger for those two ships lol #mithpost #yaoi

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fainthedcherry · 21 hours

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When I was a child in 2013, visiting Nickelodeon's site and finding a treasure-trove of Spongebob, Winx and TMNT flash games was like magic to me. BUT MAN. The TMNT flash games are one of the best ever to me I've played in my life. (on an aesthetic stand-point! Turtle Tactics and Dark Horizons are so awesome man, legendary flash games to me.)

Since I am utterly autistic about 4 green alien turtles and their rat dad...Here we are again. With me posting OC cringe 2016 me would've killed myself over :V (cry about it 11 yo/ me, afraid of cringe culture back then, it's DEAD NOW)

Gonna sneak-post my redo of that ancient drawing I did of Alex 2 years ago, for the base-post : D

2 years ago, I used flashpoint to replay it for the first time in years and I remember crying of glee LOL (I still play Dark Horizons and turtle tactis to this day btw). I played Dark Horizons and Turtle Tactics and also TMNT: Throw Back (NO I DID NOT NAME THIS LIKE A MEME THIS IS ITS NAME. I STILL BURST INTO LAUGHTER LIKE A CHILD OVER THE NAME AGING POORLY DUE TO INTERNET LINGO)

Those 2 flash games are just so...Technically advanced?? For its time?? LIKE A FULLY FLEDGED 3D FLASH GAME WITH UNITY ENGINE BASIS? DAMN. And then Dark Horizons? CHEF'S KISS I LOVE THAT GAME SO MUCH. AESTHETICALLY AND THE COMBAT FEELS RLLY NICE TO ME IMO, AND JUST...Everything about THAT flash game, god TIMELESS CLASSIC I COULD YAP ON FOR HOURS ABOUT THIS NO JOKE.

I am enthralled by the designs and art of Dark Horizons, it's why I made this drawing. The game just..Speaks to me on so many levels. IT'S JUST SO PLEASING TO SEE ALL THE ARTWORK I EXTRACTED. As far to my knowledge- it never got released, so I might make a post of just a few favourites I liked from the game. :D

I just wonder if I can post those in the first place, it's after all, not my artwork, from a flash game, and TMNT, so yeah, legal IP and stuff. I unfortunately don't know who the artist if of the flash games, but if I can find that out via googling or digging for credits in the game or the files, I'll see if I can credit them, so that posting will be fairly accredited!!

OH YEAH RIGHT ALSO QUICK BANTER ABT ART SORRY I AM VERY PASSIONATE ABOUT THOSE FLASH GAMES AS YOU CAN TELL,,,

I studied the in-game sprites for a good few hours back then, and did my best to replicate it to the best of my abilities!! I think Mushu maybe could've been done better looking back at it, but I think it was the best that I could do back then. :D Plus, I remember being really happy, excited and proud of this piece, as it reflected something, my childhood self always wanted: For Alex to like.."fake" being an official character LOL. I had sooo many dreams where Alex was hanging out with the turtles and Ninjago and throwing in Power Rangers for good measure, just...Everything I liked as a child, I somehow connected in my dreams via either "OH YEAH THE RAINBOW FAIRY!" or "OH YEAH SUDDENLY PORTAL AND MY MARY-SUES JUST BRAVE IT WHILST THE OFFICIAL CHARACTERS DRAMATICALLY TELL THEM NOT TO GO"

^I had vivid and....Creative dreams as a child to say the least, sometimes even Darth Vader and Eggman appeared as the bad guys, despite TMNT and Power Rangers and Ninjago w/ the snakes and lord Garmadon or however you spell him (I never checked + I'm German so ofc his name might be different in english)- I- do I have to go on about the dreams I FULLY remember I had, as a 6-9 yo/, until I told myself at 10 how embarassing my dreams are and stopped doing so? I DIGRESS. I..Need to be more professional in these, instead of such pure fandom trash oml, I feel bad for whoever actually has to read through my blatant autistic interests as a child and thinking "wtf is he on about" dfgklfdg

ANYWAY NEKST POST IS THE BASE. I SWEAR. SORRY I LOVE RAMBLING

#digital art #artwork #art #artists on tumblr #character art #tmnt 2k12 #tmnt #tmnt oc #teenage mutant ninja turtles #tmnt dark horizons #flash games #fainthed #fainthed cherry #o0CherryPie0o #Fainthed-Cherry #o0fainthedcherry0o

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uglypastels · 1 year

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Right

I thought this was over but then i saw it pop up in my notifications again and truly had a face crack moment

Because that's all you give by leaving these kinds of comments. A very sad and empty feeling in my chest that makes me want to scream. Of course, it doesn't help that the comment was left on a fic where these were literally all the comments before it

(The last one i cut off because it just was a suggestion of where the story should go)

Now, i removed the urls bc i do not have anything against these people. It's not about them. This type of stuff shows up in almost every fic of mine.

And yes, obviously I appreciate the thought behind the fact someone wants to read more of my writing but I also cannot stop the feeling of how little the work i actually have put out is valued.

Maybe it is a short fic of not even a thousand words (although I have also gotten these demands on fics reaching 15k in word count) but it still takes time and effort and energy. Especially with requests, its difficult to write something you know another person has thought of, has expectations for... There is always doubt in my mind when I post a request that I failed the person who wanted the story because it's not what they expected. It's nervewrecking. So yeah, seeing people enjoy the story and wanting more definitely dissipates that constant worry But (there's always a but y'all)

A writer has their own ideas of how a story should go. Even if its a request, you get to interpret that in your own way (previously mentioned anxieties follow up later) and hopefully those interpretations will be appreciated. That includes the plot. And the plot includes, you guessed it, a beginning and an ending.

As the writer, I decide when and how the story ends.

By getting comments such as the ones I put above, I just get constant reminders shot in my face that no one really cares. Not just about me- hell, i dont care about myself- but about writers in general. No one cares about the actual creativity of the writing or the processes. Yall just want your free content, which is understandable in this economy, and then move on.

I could blame this on the Story Time/Like for Part Two internet culture and maybe I am. Hopefully you can see the comparison, especially with how on Tiktok all content constantly seems to be accumulating into series and parts and just never ending. All a person has to do is comment "pt 2 pls" and like it and done.

Just consider that, you get to enjoy something that is given to you completely for free, no questions asked. So why dont you actually enjoy it? Why does there have to always be more? (And if so, why cant the "more" be the already existing catalogues of the writers on here? Or did you skim through all that already -sorry im getting pissed off now, sleep deprivation)

Anyway, i'm tired and dont make any sense. Besides, i cant and wont police people around on here. read the stuff you want, comment all you want, but dont forget that the people writing the stories you like are also human with their own ideas and emotions. Not machines who can print out words at any given command.

#didnt even get into that i have specified on several occasions that i dont take requests through comments #or that i dont do part 2 #or how some of these comments dont ask just Expect there to be more #like no sir #z rants #writing

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