#and they turn up being dead for real O.o

[blindecho6]

So DM just killed our captain and made a new captain. That was a session

#yep definately a session #and it was supposed to be one of the “filler” ones since one of the players wan't avaliable today #and the death was planned but still #it suprised me #I even said when they got hit “Oh no they killed them” #without checking on them first #and they turn up being dead for real O.o #dnd #dnd dungeons and dragons #dungeons and dragons #my post #my text post

[thesparklingwriter]

𝒄𝒆𝒍𝒆𝒔𝒕𝒆'𝒔 200 𝒇𝒐𝒍𝒍𝒐𝒘𝒆𝒓 𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒏𝒕!!

prompt: f, i, j, n | Zhongli

an: it's been a hot minute but i want to remind you guys that i am not dead and i will forever wake from my tumblr slumbr to write stuff for Zhongli. i have a kaeya ficcoming up and then another zhongli one and then i'm out of ideas and possibly doing exams o.o enjoy :)

taglist | masterlist | event

F is for fiancée…

Of course, human traditions like marriage are a little out of his area of expertise, but what’s another contract to add to his already staggering list? Especially when it’s so important to you? Introducing you to those around as his fiancee makes his heart swell with pride, and the grin on your face every time you say the word makes him want you to repeat it over and over again, to declare to the world that he’s yours. And he makes it painfully clear that he can’t wait until he can call you his wife, but until then, he’s more than happy to call you his fiancée.

I is for I love you…

Zhongli is very vocal about his love for you—you could never allow yourself to even think he doesn’t. But he knows his actions mean more than his words, so he makes sure to supplement his words of affirmation. You’re noticeably more hesitant to use the words, but when Zhongli hears you tell him you love him… It’s not that he’s surprised to hear it, or that he ever believed it wasn’t true, but it knocks him for six more often than it doesn’t. He’ll always be sure to make you repeat it as many times as possible, pretending he can’t hear you, before you call him out for his incessant teasing.

J is for jealousy…

It takes a while for Zhongli to realise that the bitter taste that settles in his mouth when he has to relinquish you to the rest of Liyue is jealousy. He’d initially chalked it up to being worried about your welfare out on the streets, with the way they crawl with Fatui nowadays. But then he sees you laughing with another adventurer, and while there are no signs of either of you being interested in each other, he suddenly feels his stomach turn. Upon seeing him, your face lights up and you excitedly introduce him to your friend, and Zhongli feels very childish for even allowing himself to be mildly upset. But perhaps, he can blame that on his dragon’s instincts.

N is for night…

Being an archon, Zhongli has no real need for sleep— at least, not in the same way you and other humans do. And that also means that sometimes he struggles to drift off. So at night, Zhongli sits beside you in bed, reading over old contracts or historical manuscripts that have been sent to him. Sometimes you complain about the bedside lamp being too jarring, and he settles for laying awake in bed, gently stroking your hair as you doze happily. Zhongli has mixed feelings about the night—on bad days it can be lonely, a reminder of the different natures of your existence, a reminder that he’ll live on for years after you die, but on most days he’s grateful for the quiet moments it yields. He can’t truly despise anything in the world as long as he has you.

#celeste's 200 follower event #celeste's 100 follower event #genshin x reader #zhongli x reader #zhongli fluff #zhongli genshin impact #zhongli genshin #zhongli genshin x reader #zhongli x you #genshin fanfiction #genshin impact fan fiction

[wataksampingan]

So... Episode 65 was released on Fast Pass today.

Spoilers for Episode 65-67 and some parts of the webnovel

Intriguing how one or two readers were able to correctly guess that Dodolea had assaulted Theo. I had to bumble around Naver, earn cookies one pair at a time and be rewarded by having my heart ripped out of my chest when I read what happened to him.

(”Watak, the signs were so obvious, how could you not tell?” I dunno man, I thought this was going to be supernatural magic and curses, not actual literal sexual assault). The screaming and gnashing of teeth in the next chapter is going to be wild.

How far Dodolea went is left vague-ish on purpose, I expect, though the drugging is in itself already enough to condemn her. I don’t know what sort of explanation (not endorsement) will be given for her actions considering that when Theo bolted out of there, her expression is LITERALLY “o.o”

What the fuck is going on with her? Is she going to be, as the webnovel proceeded to explain, possessed by some witch that’s obsessed with a past reincarnation of Theo? Is this witch so ancient that sexual assault is not in her vocabulary? Is the real Dodolea already dead? Is this going to take some other less supernatural turn? seungu what are you planning?? I have so many questions???

Theo’s soft-hearted nature is going to be the death of him. And I’m going to strangle this palace aide - who was only doing his job - but nonetheless. If I were Gloria/Phineas/Saoirse and found out about this conversation, I would chuck him into a sewer and leave him there for a day.

“Think about what she had to go through in society after you refused to marry her”??

Listen here, you absurd little 7:3 hair ratio man.

The woman is a princess of the blood, significantly above his station as grand duke. The only reputation she’s gained is the misfortune to be besotted by this man who’s married, and perhaps an embarrassing way of showing it. The worst thing the nobles could have said was “well, that was very gauche of the princess, what an unfortunate choice, she has no taste in men, why does she keep trying” Clearly, she still can move about in polite society without censure coz she keeps fucking showing up to mess with Perry, make vaguely threatening remarks and just generally be creepy. Like, all of that has been on her. A princess of Castor, with such a powerful family, cannot possibly be taken down so easily in social circles.

His reputation, on the other hand, despite all the admiration from the average citizen, is way worse than hers, and always has been. He’s the one whose first wife moved out after two months, claiming he was the worst husband AND he’s a supposed war fiend, bloodthirsty and vicious. I get that gossip can be fatal but Dodolea is not about to be further humiliated by him walking out. He’s already built up a reputation for being cold and rude and giving people the cut direct so why should this be any different? 

Yes, yes, princess of Castor bla bla bla - but what’s your point??

But NO, he had to think of her despite himself, despite the emperor’s shitty behaviour and what she did to him. The LOOK on his face when the servant asked him not to sUbJeCt hEr To MoRe HuMiLiAtIoN (I still find this the most efficient orthographic way to convey sarcasm; my apologies if you find this offputting).

He sat there, subjecting himself to a panic attack and PTSD because he, at the heart of everything, actually seems to care about people. Even the reason he took the drugged drink from Dodolea’s servant in the past was because that man told him how much he admired the grand duke, and seemed to sincerely want his approval. So Theo took the drink to be polite. And suffered for it.

No wonder Daniel’s smoking by episode 66. I’d pick up a cigarillo/cigar too if I had to work under these conditions.

At least Episode 67 has Theo on... some kind of mend. And we get to see Phineas yell at him for being An Absolute Idiot. You can just about tell which panel involves him wondering why he went to all that trouble of going to med school (or its equivalent in this universe) when his own nephew insists on being Stupid.

(In case it’s not clear, I love Phineas with my whole heart and each time he looks like he wants to quit and become a humble radish farmer in the country, my love for him grows three times larger.)

I'll also have to be patient and wait to see what sort of hobby Theo apparently indulges in and is thoroughly embarrassed to be found out about (interior design/architecture wasn’t what I’d expected but y’know what, go off your grace). I don’t think I have it in me to download more random apps to earn free cookies for Naver. Then again, considering the medium lengths I’ve already gone to for this manhwa, who can say really?

Pictured: the relationship I have with this manhwa apparently

#MILAOWM #my in laws are obsessed with me #my in-laws are obsessed with me #spoilers #so many spoilers #so very many spoilers #Theo Lapileon #someone save this man #someone save Phineas also while they're at it #let him retire early #let Molton retire also #we need some HR intervention #this series is making me ramble as if I can earn free coins and cookies for it #MILAOWM episode reactions #MILAOWM spoilers

[theinsanecrayonbox]

FOP: A New Wish ep 9-12

only 1 more week after this. kinda sad; this is actually a pretty fun ride

Episode 9: Trial and Hair-ror

the description of this episode almost literally is Hairicane. the title card is even similar. i guess we'll see if Cosmoa and Wanda bring up any deja vu about this scenario.

also weirdly this one isn't listed separately again On Demand; the other 3 are while we have e10/e11 stitched together and e11/e12 stitched together also available. again, this is why airing only 15 min segments as *separate episodes* is annoying. yes it's available stitched to e8 (as it properly should be), but it's still annoying. ok i'm done ranting about this, onto the actual episode!

the hair is talking...ok, we are not retreading...

so many hair puns...

and Hazel is bald O.o

i'm having trouble commentating here, as i don't do hair stuff. i mean we're doing a lot of Looney Toons shenanigans, so that's fun i guess.

"this clock tower was here the entire time" pfft ok

the hair built a person suit....ok, i'll add that to the horror elements

but ok the overall message is be kind to yourself and others, winning isn't everything, i...idk what else. this episode just didn't do it for me, which is a-ok! it's not bad, it's just...not interesting to me personally. and you know, being the first episode to be like that this season, that's a pretty good track record. so we still good.

Episode 10: Weird Science

this and the next taking title cues from old tv huh? i can dig it

wait Alec Schwimmer is a writer??? didn't you write some of my Top 10 episodes?? *goes to check* oh...no you didn't...you did write the more tolerable s9 episodes though so maybe that's why i recognize the name. ahem, anywhos...

SPORT! that's what Wanda called Tim...thus Squirt for Hazel...idk why that just clicked in my head

but wait, she can't wish for her failed science project to work with the intent to win eth science fair with it; that's using magic to win a contest and you aren't allowed that in Da Rules. her lightbulb should just turn off once we get to the judging portion...

oh but no we're doing this; they changed the laws of science so her potato lamp would work. well...i suppose that would skirt the "can't use magic to cheat" rule a bit, since they didn't make the project work...they just made physics change to allow what she made to work...that's totally different right? (heh Inkshade's "is it really a lie if reality twists itself to make what you said truth" really applies here)

oh hai Jorgen! there's a science fairy...who's a brain in a jar...*puts another check in the horror category* but interestingly enough that fairy magic has to follow the laws of physics, considering they always manipulate it. if anything i'd say they'd have to listen to the rules of entropy and chaos sure *shrugs* but interesting that once Jorgen knew it was for eth science fair he didn't cite the "no magic to cheat and win" rule

potato power fixes everything lol ok sure

i love the "I tried" sticker

mk, so overall it was an ok episode. very typical for the setup, and we learned our lesson by the end. it's passable.

Episode 11: Mystery She Wished

ok for real, you do a Murder She Wrote parody title? who's watching me? i LOVE Murder She Wrote so much!! (unironically) you already are starting off with mega points

daww she's a mystery buff too, that's cute

hehe Father Time cameo, boy does he look ominous

hmmm...we're going classic detective noir like in Where's Wanda? and not Mrs Fletcher-ing this. my excitement has dwindled, but it's ok

implying a dead body's in a rug so casually O.o dang show, i love your darkness

wait why is Mark Chang on the suspect/conspiracy board??? Elvis i get, and the Jar-Jar knock off, but there was a Grey alien, so Mark was redundant...but hey Mark cameo

ok so we'll cite Da Rules here but not in the previous episode?

oh cool twins, that's a neat twist

and yeah Hazel, even i figured they were doomsday preppers. and they are also conspiracy nuts

heh fairies in the lava lamp. Genie Meanie Minnie Mo reference

but ok that was kinda cute. the best part was the title...for me, but yeah no it's fine.

Episode 12: Prime Meridian Love

the girl is an anime fan. mk, i can get on board with that. it's a different, yet familiar character trait. Tim liked comic books, and they tried to do it for Chloe with her Hungry Games book series. plus anime and manga are far more popular and easily accessible these days. so yeah, cools.

heh she can't avoid spoilers

oh and hazel girl, i get the dance thing

pfffft buwahahah the magical girl sequence as fish-boytoy is made real from the book XDDD

ok so we're citing Da Rules about fictional characters knowing about fairies.

AND HE'S ROBBIE DAYMOND!!!!! BLUE MAGICAL BOI!! you're getting type cast but it's so funny XDDD also magical anime dress up montage XD

heh Dev secretly likes the manga, that's cute. the principal is too...that's funny XD

i kinda love the different frame rate hotfishboi has vs Hazel and the rest

another magical transformation into a blobfish XDDD

but wait if he's staying in the real world, doesn't that mean his series is gonna fall apart? that's what happened when the Chin was wished out and refused to go back. then again, it's a manga...their release schedules are different, so would anyone really notice if the series just ended. i mean, Hazel didn't know about the non-translated prequel. and also series can go on hiatus for years then come back too, so yeah it'd be far less noticeable compared to the monthly Crimson Chin series

so, this was actually a fun take on wishing your media character real. and you know, Robbie Daymond being a magicalhotblueboi. so i give this episode many points.

#kp watches tv #kp talks fop #review #spoilers

[missmeinyourbones]

HELLO I JUST WANTED TO SAY THE AOT CHARACTER IVKS KEEP ME UP AT NIGHT BUT ALSO HAVE MADE ME LAUGH SO HARD I ALMOST THREW UP SO THANK YOU!!!!

And!!!!

Can I ask for AOT character's as parents but like.. the stuff they do wrong that their spouse would get mad at them for and that makes ABSOLUTELY NO SENSE like??? "Why did you use a solo cup to feed Charles?" "All the bottles were dirty." I am LIVING for this stuff rn 😭😂

this is so fucking funny please. i love a good crack post, esp when its aot characters being stupid. here are some aot characters x stupid parent moments. also thank u for reading the icks im super glad they made you laugh ^v^ 

eren doesnt feed his babies real food. like food that will actually provide their growing bodies w nutrients and vitamins. you ask him to pack their lunch for school and you look over and see him putting in the whackiest shit: a few peanuts, a bag of cheetos, some oreos, a singular laffy-taffy. hes sick for that. also when his babies are really young and cant eat solid foods yet hes like babe can i give them a bite of pizza? can i let them try this cookie? NAUR 

mikasa read once that talking to your baby in a normal adult voice provides faster growth and development so she refuses to talk in a baby voice or play with your kid in a child-like manner. she speaks to your baby like a normal ass person (which has its pros!) but is so fucking funny to see her converse with the 2 year old like theyre 30 and paying a mortgage. shes like “what would you like for a snack?” and the baby babbles complete nonsense and shes like “ok, i dont understand that, can you enunciate a little more?” or the baby is making a mess and shes openly says “stop. thats annoying” WHAT DO U MEAN UR BABY IS BEING ANNOYING LMFAOOOOO

armin is that weird parent that doesnt let his kid watch shows like spongebob because he thinks its somehow connected to witchcraft and doesnt teach ur kid anything. like he only lets ur kid watch tv if its an educational program (fun police fr). you come home to him and ur 3 year old watching a documentary on photosynthesis. LET UR BABY WATCH SOMETHING NORMAL LIKE DORA DAMN

mentioned this before but jean lets his kids pick out their own clothes to support their decisions and encourage self expression and confidence! but the issue w that is the fact that his kid is like 5 and picks the ugliest shit that does not match....like at all.....so they leave the house looking homeless. im talking you come home and ur kid is wearing neon orange pants with brown boots and a yellow and purple blouse that says something stupid like TROUBLEMAKER <3 and ur like jean. tell me they didnt leave the house like that. (they did.)

connie complains about changing ur kids diaper every time he does it. EVERY SINGLE TIME. he still does it, but not without being such a fucking baby about it. youve been home alone watching ur baby all day and connie finally comes home and u guys are hanging out and ur like babe can you please change them im exhausted from today and hes like EW it smells so bad :/ or GROSS IT GOT ON MY HAND >:( and you can feel your eye twitching bc ur covered in baby poop and spit from the entire day 

sasha openly swears around ur child and then acts dumb/surprised when they repeat her words. she doesnt even think to censor herself when ur baby cant talk yet so shes all FUCK and SHIT around the house. which is fine until your baby’s first word is bitch and shes like O.O WHERE DID YOU LEARN THAT. you come home and shes like show mama/dada/whoever what you learned today! and ur baby looks you dead in ur eyes and says bitch.

reiner does puzzles with your kid but gets equally if not more frustrated than they do when he cant figure it out. theyre doing a butterfly puzzle and reiner is trying to teach them how to separate the corner and edge pieces first. once they get to the middle pieces, the two of them are putting any piece anywhere it kinda fits, trying every combination and turning each piece every which way. he starts to get overwhelmed because why is this puzzle for eight year olds so fucking hard and ur daughter notices and is like “dad, its ok, i kinda wanna play dolls instead anyways”

im stealing ur example w the bottle for porco because its so fucking him. so nonchalant he doesnt even think twice about it. hes like oh the bottles are all dirty? why would i LOGICALLY THINK TO WASH ONE when i could just give them formula in a plastic cup? hes so fucking stupid he doesnt understand that babies like struggle swallowing and cant sip and stuff so hes like why arent you drinking? must not be hungry :/ IDIOT

#aot headcanons #aot hcs #eren headcanons #mikasa headcanons #armin headcanons #jean headcanons #connie headcanons #sasha headcanons #reiner headcanons #porco headcanons #eren x reader #mikasa x reader #armin x reader #jean x reader #connie x reader #sasha x reader #reiner x reader #porco x reader

[pies-writes-and-more]

So I saw this tik tok trend of “would you hit your girl as hard as you can for 1 billion 💵?” And I was thinking how tsukki would answer “no 😑” if you asked him cuz 1. He knows you’d be anxious at the anticipation 2. You crying would break his heart 3. This tik tok question is stupid cause who’d be paying the money?? Right no one, so it’s pointless. Dumbest question ever (wanted to share a funny thought)

Omg I’m dead this was the funniest thing I’ve gotten today 😂😂😂😂

This was too hilarious of an idea so I thought I’d make this a cute funny little headcanon thing! @blue-peach14 thank you so much for sending this in!!!! It was literally the funniest thing for me to read while I was at work haha. Hope you don’t mind me turning it into a little headcanon piece!

Warnings: None but probably some swearing lol and you know... the fact that some of them actually hit you lol

Characters: Tsukishima Kei, Ushijima Wakatoshi, Hinata Shoyo, Kageyama Tobio, Ennoshita Chikara, and Oikawa Tooru, all with a GenderNeutral!Reader (let me know if I used something gendered so I can change it pls!)

A/N: Thank you to @satan-ruler-of-hells and @thisnoodlewritesao3 for being such inspirations and helps for this 😂❤️and obviously @blue-peach14 for the idea :)

Tsukishima:

“What a stupid question”

Really just says this and rolls his eyes because he needs to consider the options

Would you??? Want him to do it??? Or were you testing how nice he was????

He decides it’s stupid cause who would pay for this???

Points this out to you and you’re just like omg Tsukki it’s just a funny little thing

Gives you a little annoyed look and decided on no (he really hates the look of tears welling in your eyes... it would be even worse if he were the one to hit you)

Flicks you in the head anyways but kisses it better immediately

Ushijima:

Didn’t understand what you were asking

Hits the top of your head cause he thought that’s what you wanted but like gently

You’re like ???? Um ushijima it’s not real

And he’s like what’s not??

Both of you just standing there like... what?

You laugh when you realize he didn’t get it

Have to explain it again and he just stands there with a furrow in his brow

“Would you... want me to hit you? Would that make you happy?”

You’re like um Ushi that’s a lot of money so yes. We could buy a lot of food

So you agree on yes together haha

Hinata:

@thisnoodlewritesao3 @satan-ruler-of-hells and I all agreed on this one

Would 100% hit himself on the head

Definitely didn’t understand the question

“Hinata why would you hit yourself??”

“For the money?”

“Hinata you’re supposed to hit me!”

O.O “why would I want to hit you”

“For the money!”

“But that’s why I hit myself”

A little back and forth before he refuses because he never wants to hurt you

Still insists he gets hit instead

Tells you he has a lot of experience since he gets hit in the face during volleyball a lot

Kageyama overhears and appears suddenly because he too wants to hit hinata

Kageyama:

A certified dummy

Whacks you in the head and is like so where do we collect the money

Man put effort in this hit too like damn okay leave a fricken bump 😭

Feels bad when he realizes it was a rhetorical thing

turns into a red blueberry boi because he just can feel the guilt eating him up inside

Kisses your little bruised bump cause he’s feeling v bad

internally yelling at himself pls tell him it’s okay because now he thinks you’re going to leave him and that’s literally the last thing he wants 

he loves you so much he just only has one braincell and it’s playing volleyball

Brings you milk and your favourite juices cause they apparently will help heal you

Ennoshita:

Shakes his head when you ask, but you can’t tell if it’s out of disappointment or if he’s answering the question

Takes your phone away and tells you to stop watching so many tiktoks

(this is the third tiktok related thing you’ve asked him. Man is fed up 😂)

When you insist on an answer he tells you “obviously not”

Refuses to hurt you no thanks he is a good boy thank you very much

Will not discuss further, shuts you up about it by buying you food

Oikawa:

Didn’t even let you finish the sentence

Man hit you hard too 😂

“Oikawa would you hit me-“

SmACK

You just standing there like wtf oWWW????

He just smile like the pretty boy he is 😇

“don’t ask for things you don’t want”

“If you had let me finish my fucking sentence” 🥺

Lots of kisses after, feels a little bad for hitting you but also not really 😂

Haikyuu Masterlist

taglist (let me know if you’d like to join!)

@scphiredrafts @aurumk @devilkittymusic @thisnoodlewritesao3 @satan-ruler-of-hells @trashy-simp @jeppiet @lucyheartfilias-wife @darkvadeeer @haikyuutothetop

#haikyuu #haikyuu!! #tsukishima x reader #ushijima x reader #hinata x reader #kageyama x reader #ennoshita x reader #oikawa x reader #hq tsukishima #tsukishima x y/n #tsukishima kei x y/n #tsukishima kei x you #tsukishima x you #tsukishima kei x reader #ushijima x y/n #ushijima x you #ushijima wakatoshi #hq ushijima #ushijima fluff #ushijima headcanons #ushijima scenarios #hinata x you #hinata x y/n #hinata shoyo #hinata shoyo x reader #hinata shoyo x you #hinata shoyo x y/n #kageyama tobio x reader #kageyama x y/n #kageyama x you

[thegreatobsesso]

Word Find Game

Thanks for the tag and the fun words, @diphthongsfordays!

Star ((( Oh, shit. I somehow have only one mention of “star” in my whole WIP and it’s in a big one toward the end. O.o ))) Callie POV

Oh, dead-person social worker was not a job she wanted. Her throat had gone all sandpaper. “I’m really, really sorry, alright? But you’re in someone else’s body right now, look.”

She took Riley’s hand and held it gently, raised it up in front of Riley’s own eyes. “Is this you? Do you wear stuff like this?” She hooked a finger under the cuff of Riley’s shirt, willing to bet the jersey fabric was a hundred years off what Abigail fucking Blackwood would recognize.

That was when she noticed faint scars on the palm of Riley’s hand, six little equidistant lines, almost like a star. Realizing Riley was in no place to resist her, she turned over the other hand and saw the same exact pattern.

What happened to her?

She remembered the spirit, the one who was drawing frightened little breaths in through Riley’s mouth. 

“It’s probably… scary being dead,” she fumbled, and tried to summon the steadiness she might use to talk to Grace. It might not be any older. “I’m sorry, I really am. But the woman you’re talking through right now, she’s not dead, and you can’t stay inside her, okay? You have to let her go.”

Stagger Riley POV

Callie’s DNA was unlike she - or likely, anybody else - had ever seen.

The lab at the university had more sophisticated equipment, but she didn’t dare take these samples there, even after hours. She carried on at work like nothing was different, taking tiny bits of Callie off ice when she got home, taking apart the samples in her basement and marveling over what she found.

Magic was monogenetic by nature. Or, so everyone thought.

But, this: a completely new type of magic, duogenetic, untested, undiscovered, even by the only person alive who carried it, unless Downing Bay had a staggeringly advanced science arm, and she’d never heard of one of those in a prison.

Soft (TW for weird, kind of sad kinky thoughts 🤷‍♂️) Callie POV

Callie could get an audience at a moment’s notice if she had something to say, she had tabloids and newspapers alike at her beck and call. She could give them Riley’s name and tell them about her part in the heist, her basement of horrors, and most damning of all, her quest to remove magic from a human being not by suppression, but by annihilation. Hell - Riley could end up in this very cell with her.

But if she did that, then the world would know the truth about Callie, the old Callie, and that wouldn’t do. That she was guilty, soft, trusting and stupid - no. Nobody could see the Callie that Riley saw. It was out of the question.

So they had each other by the balls.

And that potential mutual destruction was a living thing they held up every day, together.

If Callie were any kind of romantic, it would have set her heart on fire. As she was, she usually just reached under the covers and took advantage of the relative privacy of the top bunk.

Shudder (Oh, SHIT. Ugh, damn, I’m just putting this out there, here you go, guys...) Callie POV

“So you’re my mom,” Grace chirped as she dragged her through the empty halls, avoiding the slanted shapes on the floor made by moonlight, keeping to carpet to make less noise in the dead of night. “Should I call you mom?”

Callie shuddered. “Absolutely not.”

“Okay. Did you wonder about me? About what I looked like, and stuff?”

“I knew what you looked like,” she said, pressing herself against a wall and craning her neck to see around the corner.

“How?”

Did children speak exclusively in questions? “The train station, for starters,” she muttered as she watched a guard walking back and forth, slowly, across the threshold around the corner. “And before that, I watched you.”

Her bones felt slightly stronger than tissue paper. This was not good.

“It was you!”

She cast a glance behind her - Grace was agape, staring up at her in awe. “Oh, you got me out of that bad place, didn’t you? Oh, I always wondered but I’d have never guessed, you! You’re my guardian angel!”

“Shhh!”

The guard looked their way and she clapped her hand over Grace’s mouth. “My magic is crap right now, kid,” she said, articulating every word. “Keep your voice down.”

Grace nodded, but even after she moved her hand again, she watched her with wide eyes full of wonder. The unabashed admiration made Callie gulp.

“And, sorry,” she said, “but I’m definitely not an angel. Now, come on.”

I really wasn’t sure when I was gonna drop that one so may as well make it my final snip: Grace is... Callie’s, and Peter’s, the guy she killed. 🥴Grace is also the fourth POV of the book, she is 12 and a Good Egg™. Callie did not know she was pregnant when she did what she did, and.... yeah. So there’s like, whole lot there and maybe I’ll make another post about it now that I let the cat outta the bag. 

Thanks again @diphthongsfordays, your words resulted in me choosing some real whoppers this time. 😈

Tagging @rosiewritesandrambles, @sleepy-night-child, @winterandwords, @drippingmoon and @dontjudgemeimawriter and ANYONE ELSE who wants to play with new words: tonight, tomorrow, yesterday and today :) :) :)

#oc: callie #oc: riley #oc: peter #oc: grace #tag game #writing snippets #my wip #writing #writebrl #original novel #original writing #tw: sex mention #tw: sex #tw: pregnancy #tw: swears #tw: death

[kitkatopinions]

Tbh, in regards to Hazel I'm just upset they axed him so quickly. It's honestly to the point where part of me thinks he's not actually dead and they'll have a "big reveal" later, but you never know with RT. Feels like they could have done a lot more with the character.

Heck, I know this isn't surprising coming from me, but do you know who he could have been a great villain for? Yang. From themes, to character, to even the potential fight, it could have been great. Maybe when I wake up I'll make a whole post about that.

You're right, in his first couple scenes, he seemed like maybe he'd be a refreshing change of pace. Villains that have boundaries and morals are good, villains that seem normal at first glance are also interesting. Hazel didn't seem to fit much with the other villains in Salem's circle and he clearly had something to do with Ozpin, who - when V4 dropped - was one giant mystery.

But he was absolutely wrecked in the Haven fight, and then it just kept going. Like, oh, okay, he doesn't want to avoid violence, he isn't above hurting children, he doesn't have these boundaries, his connection to Ozpin is frankly stupid, none of our heroes but Oz and Oscar even seemed to learn his name, his stupid motivations never got properly addressed as the hypocritical garbage it was, he was tabled for most of V6 and all of V7, and then he returned only to dig even further down into being hypocritical, moral-free garbage... And then he 'turned good' because he saw that the lamp worked, and then he just died. No real exploration of his supposedly important relationship with Emerald, his 'change of heart' was totally unbelievable and the 'life lessons' he left Oz with felt totally pointless and shallow, shoved into the narrative, and just as hypocritical as Hazel has been since the Haven fight, and on top of that... Seriously, do our mains know him as anything other than 'the one guy who kept screaming 'Ozpin' at Haven who electrocuted Nora?

Honestly, I don't even mind some of the ideas of his character. The massive hypocrisy and deluding himself into thinking things that aren't true, is a good villain trait. But because the writers tried to portray him as right without actually... Making him right, the whole thing just turned out incredibly frustrating. Him being calm and softer spoken, but still kind of intimidating, and then switching to blowing up, screaming, and willing to hurt anyone and everyone because he doesn't actually have any emotional control, that's a great villain trait, except that the Haven fight was full on comical, and anything actually scary about that behavior wasn't there. (I can't stop laughing about the scene in the Haven fight, where Hazel starts like, ripping off his jacket, and the whole fight around them stops and Qrow's like o.O like he's just thinking "sir, please keep your clothes on?" The pacing was just so horrible XD)

You're right that he could've been a good villain for Yang, especially V5 Yang who was already questioning some of her stances and beliefs, but also starting to learn how to regulate her temper and be less impulsive. Hazel could represent both of those struggles at once. Honestly, Yang's relationship with Ozpin is something I wish they'd focused on more. And that's true of all the main four, but idk, I think since Yang was the one literally being told by Raven to doubt him, I just think that should've been explored properly (and with less author hatred towards Ozpin.) And Hazel really could have continued on that story. Plus, his 'switch on a dime' massive temper and short sightedness because of it is literally something Yang works in volume five to try and fix in herself. I know we already have a bit of 'this is what I could've been' in Raven, but I feel like the importance in Yang's dynamic with Raven isn't actually about Yang comparing herself to Raven, and is more about Yang realizing she never needed and doesn't want Raven, partially because Yang is different than Raven and values other things. Hazel is a man who turned into a resentful, cruel, violent, anger driven person after the loss of a family member that he loved, specifically a younger sister who wanted to be a hero, and audiences can see clear parallels between who Hazel is and who Yang could be if she lets herself. Hazel lashed out and turned against Oz and humanity itself not out of cowardice or selfishness, which were things Yang (up to V5) didn't really suffer from more than most. Instead, Hazel did so out of grief, anger, reckless abandon, mistrust - which are all themes in Yang's story. It could've been good and meaningful to see Yang confronted with these things more and then rise above them and be better. I mean, I do this quite a lot though lol, where I'm like "they missed an opportunity with Yang and almost any other character." XD But this is mostly because so many villains feel so disconnected from the mains, but Yang was my favorite of the four girls, so I guess I gravitate to her relationships more than most of the mains (though I'll forever be upset that Blake wasn't allowed to sympathize with and be understanding towards Ozpin.)

Hazel is a wasted opportunity, but what we got in canon was so frustrating and badly done.

#rwde #anti rwby #rwby bashing #rwby hate #anti hazel reinhart #anti hazel

[1800sunaarinn]

ADULT TRIO + TORTURER READER

anon asks

hiii! and thanks for enjoying my writing, idk idk i always feel like i can’t write for shit lmaoo. not even going cap, i legit got chills when i read this ask, this definitely right up my alley!! pls enjoy, anon!! :)

tw. torture, manipulation, uwu.

♰ Chrollo Luclifer

pause.

you were dangerously cute, so cute that you bordered on looking naïve. seriously, chrollo could spend hours eloquently describing how cute you were, how your actions made you even cuter, and how your words made you cuter than cuter. mans could even spend hours explaining how naïve you were. and, he could spend even more hours explaining just as eloquently that you were a manipulator.

both in nen abilities and mentality. god, you were a literal demon disguised as an angel, or something. you look cute, spoke cute, acted cute, but those hands were not cute. those soft hands have ended lives, have taken out eyeballs, yank teeth, broke bones, ripped out things that should definitely stay inside the body.

it was scary, but to chrollo, it was sexy. besides the point.

the first time he encountered your torture session was three years ago, when you had joined the phantom troupe as a pseudo member. you were an incredible informant, better than their last one.

when chrollo had left the base with his usual entourage of machi and pakunoda, it had been quiet as mouse. upon returning, he could hear the horrified and pained screams a few kilometers away.

chrollo’s first thought. feitan was torturing someone.

chrollo’s first sight. their sweet little informant torturing someone.

wait, stop the mfing music. [F/N] torturing someone?!?!

his initial reaction was to be frozen in shock, but doesn’t appear as if he was actually in shock by the events unfolding before him.

once he processed the entire thing, he could only stare for a few seconds in morbid fascination before it donned on him that you, [F/N], was actually torturing someone.

but what officially ko’ed him, was the expression on your face.

you looked completely frazzled, hair frizzy, clothes ruffled and spotted with blood. your eyes were wide like plates, pupils so tiny. the skin underneath your eyes dark and bruised. but it was the excitedly wide and sadistic smile on your face that caused him to actually sweatdrop.

chrollo was a refined young man, but seeing you look nothing like the cutesy naïve girl you had was a whole lot of shocking.

when the man had gave one last scream of pure, unadulterated fear, you had ended his life with a slow tug of his heart, pulling it free from his chest. it took a few seconds for him to truly die, you swinging his heart in front of his face with haunting giggles.

you had turned then, meeting chrollo’s eyes, appearance changing in a blink of an eye. you were back to looking cutesy, clothes clean and hair groomed. if you still weren’t holding the man’s heart, chrollo wouldn’t have known that you had just tortured someone to death.

“oh, dancho!” you had smile a true heart tugging smile, eyes forming little smiles as well. “i didn’t see you there~”

“yeah...” chrollo had trailed off, looking behind you and toward the dead man. “what’d he do?”

“hm, i want some cake. do you want cake, dancho?” you asked, before shrugging. “i’ll tell you everything over cake, pinkie promise!”

chrollo could only follow after you.

and, even now, three years later with you as his girlfriend. watching you torture someone will always cause him to sweatdrop.

he lowkey feared you.

🃏 Hisoka Morow

wait.

hisoka in a relationship with a girl who looks way too innocent to even know what —inter 🤢 interco— 🤢 intercourse🤮 is!! now that’s a sight to see.

first off, no one’s going to believe that hisoka, resident bitch clown, could bag someone like you. hell, you can’t even believe it because he is a bitch. b i c t h!

but anyways. hisoka thinks torturing is too slow, too drawn out for him, he likes fast pace things, like fights, and sex. but if it really came down to it, hisoka wouldn’t be opposed to some quality time torturing.

it was supposed to be a normal day, you know? hisoka actually showing up to the area to fight, and to secure his place in the two hundreds. you know, the usual. popping up at your house unexpectedly, and uninvited, was a normal thing. he even had a key.

but what wasn’t normal was hearing screams coming from your house, it was faint and you had to be up on your front door to hear it, but hisoka had good ass hearing.

the screams only grew louder as he entered the house, stalked around a bit to found it and then locating you and your victim in the basement.

you had a basement???! hisoka was bamboozeled.

but, no. what had him shivering his timbers, was you. his cutie pie girlfriend, looking not so cutie pootie anymore with frazzled hair and dark bruised eyes. covered in blood and wearing a bloodthirsty smile that put his to shame.

no, wait,

hold up

let him move his bangs real quick

...

nah, he saw that right

his initial reaction being “hah? why didn’t you invite me, [F/N]-chan, so rude~”

actually processed what the hell just happened. instant turn on. pervert face on, moaning immediately!

not only did you get a fright for your life, but the poor man you were torturing looked scared, disgusted and scared even more.

“oh, hisoka! hi!” you gave the man the biggest eye smile with a cutesy flustered expression, actually hearts and sparkles exploding around you. you didn’t even give the poor man a last thought before you sliced his neck so deep, his head nearly fell from his shoulders.

“what are you doing~” he had practically moaned.

“well, i’ll tell you over cake!” you all but skipped over to him, snatching his hand and bounding up the stairs for cake!

he’s totally using torture as a form of spicing up y’all’s sex lite. damn, perv.

📍Illumi Zoldyck

as the wife of a zoldyck, your ass better know how to torture. literally, it’s a requirement.

but, illumi had thought he would have to teach you how to torture. and how to kill, and how to manipulate, and how to do everything it require to become the best assassin wife.

you see, he was definitely fooled by your cutesy, naïveté act. your innocent smiles, glossy words, and dreamy stares. yes, that was it. you, a fine manipulator yourself, had fooled an even better manipulator.

poor dude was so confused when it came time to teach you how to torture.

like sorry dude, but you’ll be showing illumi a few pointers on which nerve is the quickest to receive a knee jerk scream.

his initial reaction was so stale. all he said was oh and looked on with the same dead fish eyed look.

processing... processing... completed.

“oh, oh! this is good, i don’t have to waste time teaching you.” the man sounded cheery, but he looked so dead.

you strived to have that sorta of resting bitch face.

you see, illumi can also make the weirdest, bizarre, downright ugly faces when it comes to actually releasing his bloodlust. so, seeing your features convert into something out of a horror movie only left him feeling a bit tingly.

why was he feeling tingly? what does it mean?,?!,

he lowkey enjoyed the way you lost yourself when torturing someone. you looked absolutely horrifying, and your sweet tone only added to the affect and your nen abilities working on your victim’s mind only strived to make you even more terrifying.

proud

this man was actually feeling proud of his wife

gah dayum 👨🏾‍🦳!! he found the right one, ladies it’s a wrap.

he definitely demanded little assassin babies.

like,,,,

“who taught you how to torture?” he had asked.

“a friend from my home city, he was so aggressive for such a tiny man.” you had answered absentmindedly, before bursting into horrible giggles as the man gave his last scream.

O.O —.— O.O, that type of beat.

“can we get cake?” you had turned to look at him then, smiling cutely.

“after we have intercourse. i want children, now.”

^.^ -> o.0 “hah???”

📍. 11/20/15

note — i hope you liked it. i absolutely hate the word intercouse, oh my god 😭

#illumi 📍 #hisoka 🃏 #chrollo ♰ #hxh #adult trio #hxh scenarios #hxh headcanons #hxh imagines #hxh illumi #hxh hisoka #hxh chrollo #illumi imagine #hisoka imagine #chrollo imagine #tw.torture 🍴 #tw.manipulation 😈

[drwcn]

Not to bring up the distasteful teenager memory of Twilight LMAO, but yall remember that part of the story where it is revealed after Rosalie turns into a vampire she goes and devours every single one of the men who r*ped her.

Fierce Corpse!Qin Su coming for Jin Guangshan’s life.

JIGGY was always looking for ways to make a fierce corpse wasn’t he? Well consider this.

Madam Qin confronts JGY, but it was already too late. Qin Su was already pregnant. JGY, being the dumbest smart person, realized he has fucked up, but what to do? It’s not like he can tell Madam Qin he knocked up his own sister accidentally. Unknowing of this, Madam Qin then went to Qin Su to tell her the truth. Surely even if that degenerate won’t stop this marriage, once Qin Su finds out they are related, she wouldn’t go through with it.

Well, little did Madam Qin expect, once Qin Su finds out, she’s so overcome with disgust she takes her own life (canon compliant, I think? idk what that episode was about to be honest. I always assumed Jiggy drugged her to keep her quiet, but Qin Su was the one to take her own life. Jin Rusong is at best a ball of cells at this stage and abortion is a staple trope of cdrama don’t @ me. I take no criticisms.)

Well shit, now Qin Su is half a step away from death. Jiggy discovers this first, and is like O.O oh feck, but also... opportunity????  He recruits evil gremlin extraordinaire Xue Yang, and beginner’s luck takes them to a successful resurrection.

*cue Mary Shelly shaking her head from beyond the grave or... in the future....technically.*

Qin Su is rightfully like wtf JGY, but Jiggy is like aight sis i know you’re mad, but hey now that everyone knows what’s the deal here, I think we have a common enemy: Jin Guangslut. Should we kill him or should we kill him?

Xue Yang: yo so .... you still gonna get married or what?

Qin Su: if you even think about getting married i swear to god -

JGY: ....okay, how about “fake” marry. Once dear old Dad is dead, we can...idk have an amicable separation. I can even set you up on a date with a guy I know in the fierce corpse community. His sister is still in my basement come to think of it -

QS: what

JGY: what

QS: you are a fucking nutjob, Jiggy, you know that? I can’t believe I was attracted to you.

JGY: first of all that’s hurtful, but... hey at least you didn’t insult my mother.

QS: why would i? our mothers are innocent. *deep sigh* okay fine, how should we kill JGS, I vote for castration. Also *points to the black veins on her paste-y complexion* this is gonna be a problem.

XY: *quirk an eye brow* realllly starting to see the family resemblance now. Don’t worry I got make up to cover that up. Also gotta find you some blush, so you don’t look so ... undead.

~

JGY “so we get prostitutes -”

QS “No. Jiggy, I’m sensing some internalized classism. Let’s just sic Xue Yang on him and be done with it.”

JGY “....you were less bossy before.”

QS “I was also less dead before. Also, Xue Yang doesn’t mind, do you dear?”

XY *eating the candied pastries QS got him* “Nah, not at all, jiejie. I can wear a dress and get dolled up if you want, but I want silk and the dress needs to be tailored. Bespoke. *points to his plate* These are great. Do you have more?”

JGY: *facepalm* what have done.

QS: created a fierce corpse you can’t control. Karma’s a bitch, isn’t it brother?

~

QS “I feel bad for Chifeng-zun. If I had to sit and watch you and Lan Xichen make eyes at each other over the guqin day in and day out....”

JGY “Oi, you’re not even my real wife.”

QS “Doesn’t mean I can’t nag you. Also, you have an issue, you know. You can’t just murder your way to the top.”

JGY “I wasn’t -”

QS “Save it. If you give Xue Yang enough candy, he’ll tell you anything.”

JGY “NMJ is a problem. He disrespects -”

QS “You think maybe the reason he thinks you’re a untrustworthy little shit is because you are...an untrustworthy little shit? Also he’s always violent and aggressive towards you...yeah ‘cause you’ve been playing Terrible Temper Tango on repeat for weeks.”

JGY “.....................” *well sis does have a point, maybe i should re-evaluate my strategy “Then what do you suggest I do?”

QS:  I believe Xue Yang calls it “when it doubt, fuck it out.” 

JGY: ...............................you two need to stop hanging out together. 

~

Jin Guangyao and Qin Su spend many nights in the secret chamber plotting together. Apparently the Jin crazy can both be inherited and developed. Qin Su decides her second life is rather nice, and having power is nice too, but she’d rather have some friends. 

*Jiggy and Qin Su’s Ten Step Plan to Un-Fuck the Cultivation World*

Aka Jiggy’s illegal but necessary emergency U-Turn. 

Step 1: Start playing some nice music ffs, and maybe when NMJ is in a better mood, the venerated Triad can be the venerated Triad. ;) 

Step 2: start treating MXY better. He could be useful as a loyal brother. 

Step 3:  Sic him on Nie Huaisang. They seem like they could do well together. Also, the easiest way to get through to NMJ is through his little brother.  

Step 4:  Make Jin Guangshan disappear.

Step 5: Speaking of little brothers, they’re gonna have to eventually deal with Lan Wangji. Even Qin Su’s 78 year old grandma with cataract can see he’s just a liiiiittle hung up on Wei Wuxian, who is unfortunately....dead. 

”How do you suppose we fix this particular problem?” 

”Isn’t there some cultivator prisoner found guilty punishable by death in your single minded cleansing of your political enemies?” 

"Of course. Go on I’m listening, mei-mei.” 

”So while you were off being shady, I did some research. There is a spell. I think a potential trade off could be made if we bargain right. Their soul, which was forfeit anyway, in exchange for a lifetime of protection and financial stability for their families.” 

“>:) dear sister, where have you been all my life I’ll never know.” 

Qin Sun, “Just make sure they’re not too hard on the eye. Lan Wangji doesn’t seem to be the shallow type but one never knows.” 

Step 5: Jiang Wanyin needs an emotional laxative like... last year. Look into resurrecting Jiang Yanli. Once she’s alive, all that Yunmeng Bullshit will resolve, and you will also have a Lotus Pier forever grateful for Jin Guangyao and Qin Su’s kindness. If that doesn’t work...idk get Jiang Wanyin a dog. 

“Okay, hooow are you going to get a woman to give up her soul to -”

“Can we fierce corpse her? Wei Wuxian had a bunch of undead ladies hanging around right?” 

“........worth looking into.” 

Step 6:  Jin Zixuan. Yikes -

JGY “I didn’t kill Jin Zixuan. Wei Wuxian did.” (note: CQL washed WWX of any responsibility for the deaths of others by making it so that the Song of Turmoil caused him to lose control. This, in fact, is not what is written in book canon. WWX did lose control by himself without external influence. I can cherry pick the plot points I want to keep.) 

QS “..........but you sent him to his death.” 

JGY “..........”

QS *Deep sigh* “Who can we throw under the bus this time for Jin Zixuan’s death, Jigs? Someone that won’t be missed...got it. Su She.” 

JGY “He’s loyal to me, he’s an ally -” 

QS “Listen here, once you resurrect Jiang Yanli and Wei Wuxian, you will have the eternal gratitude of Yunmeng Jiang and Gusu Lan. Who gives a shit about Su Minshan that simpering turd.” 

JGY: True. *he’s understood by now that he could get rid of those who would talk shit, belittle, and disrespect him...but he could always do more with a couple of important influential people who would spread words of his goodness. Stubborn righteous cultivators like the Jiangs, Nies and Lans.* “Also Jin Zixuan’ll be an undead, not able to inherit. We’re safe.” 

QS: “Exactly.” 

Xue Yang: eating candy......... *eye roll* 

Step 7: Because Step 6 didn’t work out, forget about Jin Zixuan. 

JGY: “you know... maybe Jin Zixuan moved on.” 

QS: “Would explain why we couldn’t call his soul back the way we called back Jiang-gu’niang.” Qin Su glances back at Jiang Yanli’s soul-infused clay body in the process of being reanimated (lifted this idea straight from Inuyasha - ahem- kikyo.) “It’s probably better this way. I don’t like the thought of sharing the control of Lanling Jin with more people.” 

JGY:  “Ah, blood of my blood you are indeed.”

Step 8:  Reveal Jin Guangshan’s evil deeds. Once they kill Dear Ol’ Dad, they can just blame EVERYTHING on him and have him be the disgrace of the entire cultivation world, and them the unfortunate children left to do his bidding and trying the best they could to salvage what they can from his trail of ruins.

Step 9: Reunite Wen Ning and Wen Qing. Lie. Blame it all on Jin Guangshan who is too dead to argue in his own defense. If Jiang Wanyin finds out about Wen Qing...well, information gets around. 

JGY “So about that Date.” 

Qin Su: “Yes I distinctively remember you promising me eligible young men of the Fierce Corpse Community.” 

JGY: >:) I’m here to make good on my words. 

Step 10: Reap the benefits of a world restored. 

#Anonymous #corie replies #qin su #jin guangyao #xue yang #corie fics #cql ideas

[aquariusshadow]

Live!Blogging Legacies 3x13

So my lovely server platform I use to watch these eps didn't have the latest Legacies ep until earlier this evening...so this live!blog is later than usual ehehe my bad.

Ok my main thing I'll be focusing on is Handon because now that real!Landon is back (maybe) I'm curious on how the Handon development will actually be since the last few episodes weren't real!Landon and Hope ehehe

Lessss go --

i was really trying to forget hope and landon having sex and him turning into mud after o.O

this is a cleo stan account and i refuse to believe shes the villain

oh kaleb...first mg's gone..now cleo? this poor soul

hi landon bby you okay?

i hope they handle landon's ptsd properly

josie's hair looks so cute what

help

ik she wears her hair like that alot but for some reason it just really suits her in this ep?

i don't blame finch for being incredibly overwhelmed

awwww josie's being her tour guide--i love some good ship parallels

hope's hair is beautiful here too

hope honey you're doing such a good job rn

she's being so careful, but still honest

cmon cleo backstory cleo backstory

OMG ARE WE ACTUALLY SEEING HER BACKSTORY

YES FINALLY

this better be good

idk why i find kaleb just casually sitting and watching this so amusing (in a good way, im into this rn hehe)

is taking landon to a school the best idea rn? i would imagine this would be overstimulating for him

oh and the flashbacks...

oh god no

who are you

landon doesn't need extra crap rn

poor cleo :/ that really got sprung on her so fast...so young too

kaleb you're so sweet ahaha

oh of courseahlsfjlhfdasljfdh

"Malivore?! That bitch is everywhere!" Kaleb is the voice of the fandom lmfaooooo

cleo honey noooo

youre just a smol bean

yep see thats why landon didn't need this crap rn

even tho alaric technically has some sort of logic in this i just....dont care about his character anymore ahaha

ok leaving finch alone rn is not the best idea????

hmmm maybe she and the other wolves will actually try and get along? idk

"this is how i learned to make friends" man my heart :/

ok that frog is adorable

is there a catch...?

noooooo froggy noooooo

that is so traumatic good lord

(also i really like the josie/cleo dynamic)

the arms....

"never make a deal with the bad guy" ahjsdflsdf josie

wow they actually made the malivore plotline interesting again

yeah josie you stand up to alaric

at least its not landon needing to die for the millionth time

man cant hope just catch a break

ok seeing handon fight together is really cool

yea you guys do make a good team <3

wait so hope being a true tribrid is how malivore dies

iiiiiiiiiinteresting

wait wait wait

klaus was already a vampire, like dead and vampire, yet he was able to have hope

so

what is alaric going on about? she should be able to have kids anyway BECAUSE she is part wolf and witch

............

am i crazy???

am i wrong here???

is my tvdu knowledge scuff?

man cleo is really becoming one of my favorite characters

cmon cleo stay

ayeeeeeeeeee finch is fitting in with the wolves good good

ooo i like the finch/jed friendship here that has potential to be a good dynamic in the future :D

yesssssss call her your girlfriend josie

okay this is really cute their kiss was adorable

did hope and cleo really have that convo off screen??? fine ok

wow...they're actually addressing my concerns with handon, especially since it was the gollum instead of real landon

seeing hope cry breaks my heart

nooooooo landon dont go

awww cleo left too

hmmm does this mean landon and cleo are gonna meet up or something?

yesssssssssss i was right

this is going to be interesting

both of them love hope so much theyre willing to team up and find another alternative

--

Cleo backstory. I repeat. Cleo backstory. Landon and Cleo going on a road trip thing to find another way to kill Malivore to protect Hope??? I sense a new OT3 on the horizon...

I love how consistently good these episodes have been!

#legacies #legacies 3x13 #liveblogging legacies #handon #cleope #landon kirby #hope mikaelson #finsie #cleo sowande #finch #josie saltzman #kaleb hawkins #so what would hope landon and cleo's ot3 name be? #okay this is reallly hard to figure out ahaha #no methan content sadly but maybe next week #sorry this came out so late #stupid server didnt post the episode until much later than normal

[sunflowericescribbles]

Time to work through some questions regarding my apprentice

1. Rosario "Sari" Laverne

First name meaning: "rosary" (m., ital.). Since I came up with the name spontaneously, I have never explicitly searched for the meaning, so it hasn´t any real significance for my character^^

the nickname: that was the endresult after many unsatisfying tries of finding one.. Rosa-Sario-Rio

Last name: Okay, I´m a bit confused now, because I thought I had searched for some specific word in different languages and ended up with a french one but now that I´m looking for it, I can´t find the meaning anymore o.o well, doesn´t matter, I liked the name, I took it and here we are xD

...now that I took a closer look at the full name, I realize what a mess it is xD italian & french mix.. what did I do o.o I probably should go back to do research before deciding on names XD

2. Vesuvia

3. Biological family Sari knows of:

mother (deceased) never knew her first name, she was only ever called by her last name Laverne older brother Elio hasn´t met him in years & isn´t even sure if he´s still alive - he is, but doesn´t live in Vesuvia anymore

4. practicing magic - it´s also a job, but that´s totally fine there was a time where he turned away from magic for a while after his mother had died, but it didn´t last long because it always found a way back to him and he just could´t leave it

5. (dark) purple/lilac - likes to combine it with tourqouise & orange prefers silver when wearing jewelry, because it suits him better (he´s not the type for gold), also has a natural habit of wearing black or dark purple as his basic color.

6. probably everything with pumpkin in it.. there are at least 5 different ways to cook a pumpkin soup, there´s pumpkin pie, pumkin smoothie, pumpkin bread and many many more things he loves with pumpkin^^

7. "If the sleeves aren´t nearly touching the ground it´s not a real magician´s robe." The one thing Sari insists on wearing are long magician robe sleeves, even if it is not a robe he´s wearing. The robe doesn´t matter as much as the sleeves, because they´re important for dramatic hand gestures.

8. ...Oh boy.. that is hard to say.. haven´t ever thought about it^^"

9.That some things of his forgotten past will come back to haunt him. His mother did not leave a good reputation, so the name Laverne is better left unmentioned even if it has been a long time ago. Sari doesn´t know but rather feels the uneasyness that comes with saying the last name.

10. none (even though Sari always wanted one) but one day he´ll find it and it will be a black cat and it will be perfect, because it will sit on his shoulder and get carried around, and it´s just the best familiar you can have, so yea, I´m not going searching for another animal when there´s already a perfect one for him :3

11. Sagitarius - I´ve looked his birthday up again since I had forgotten it and well, surprise to myself he´s born in november xD

12. The Fool (for now, because I honestly have no clue where else I should put him)

13. Asra

14. Uuuh let´s say I still have some secrets I keep from my own MC for safety reasons xD

15. a sandy beach with crystal clear ocean view, palm trees and no one else except Asra around. Peace, Quietness and one kind of single four poster bed (made of raffia) deocarted with flowing curtains and a mass off pillows.

16. Asra (yea, he is both) & Portia (that girl is close no.2)

17. Nadia - we are eternally greatful to have a countess like her, that´s all to say

18. If it´s about where I get my inspirations for my MC: mostly daydreaming and coming up with stories, with influences from different fantasy mangas/animes

19. The one thing Sari has dreamed about a few times already: meeting his familiar as a child, but never being able to form a bond because his mother always took it away.

20. Sari´s reverse would be ending up like his mother (not necessarily dead but led by negative emotions, which would end in dark magic arts he never wanted to touch again)

#the arcana apprentice #the arcana #the arcana game #the arcana fan mc #fan apprentice #arcana mc past #the arcana question #arcana oc #naming a character #name meanings

[lailannajacobs]

Girl Going Nowhere

Pairing: Bucky x fem!reader

Request: Aaaanyways I had a small request about a Bucky x reader fanfic that I was wondering if you could do sometime if you get a break in your busy schedule. Maybe something along the lines of them both being in the avengers and reader has like a huge crush on Bucky but he sees her as a "kid" until boom they have some sorta fancy event where reader turns up lookin like a snacc and Bucky is like o.O when he sees her AND THEN THEY GET TOGETHER AND LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER ...

Word Count: 5.1k

Warnings: Little violence, pinch of angst but 99% fluff 

A/N: thank you so much @winkwonk123456​ I had a blast with this request! This is probably much longer than it had to be, but I couldn’t resist adding in some 2012 avengers type moments! Hope you enjoy, I’d love to know what you think! P.s Italics are flashbacks, all else is present <3  

Girl Going Nowhere 

“You know, I think you’re getting better at this,” Nat stared down at you, her smirk the only thing you could see.

A groan escaped  your lips and you sunk further into the sparring mat. You’d done this enough times to know that you’d  find a few new bruises tomorrow but that the worst part was right here, right now, trying to catch your breath.

“No, really,” She continued, “That was a whole minute longer than last time. Anyone else and you would have had them down.”

“Doesn’t feel like it,” You muttered, taking her extended hand.

Straightening you out, she laughed, “You’ve got your first mission in a couple days. Just making sure you’re ready. The more pain-”

“I know, I know,” You interrupted, stretching your neck from side to side, “The more pain I feel here, the less likely I am to be dead out there. Doesn’t make getting pounded into the ground any easier though.”

“But then it would ruin the fun for me,” She grinned, the kind that usually meant you’d be flat on your back within seconds.

The gym doors opened and you both looked up. Bucky and Sam walked in, gym bags slung over their shoulders, already dressed for a workout. They both smiled when they saw the two of you.

“Hey kid, ready for your first mission?” Bucky asked with a pleasant smile.

“Always,” You snapped.

It was a wonder you’d heard anything passed the word ‘kid’. The one syllable, three letter word made you want to punch something. Mainly him. Though half the time you weren’t sure which part of your body you wanted to connect with his. And that was the problem. He saw you as the new recruit, as nothing more than a… than a…you swore internally: a kid. It didn’t matter that you looked the same age or that you were a fully functioning adult, in his eyes, you were just a kid who’d shown up on the compound a year ago - SHIELD’s newest asset. That old fart could go to hell for all you cared.

“You boys had better not be late for dinner,” Nat shot them both a pointed look, “It’s Tony’s idea of a big family dinner while most of us are around and he’s expecting you.”

“Tony’s cooking?” Sam asked incredulously. Nat laughed, steering you toward the door. He grinned, “Yeah, didn’t think so.”

“Just be there!” She called over her shoulder. Then she turned her action to you, winced and then shrugged, “If you need it, come see me, I’ve got concealer that works for that kind of thing.”

And with that cryptic bit, she walked off with a joyful wave. You touched your cheek and winced. Shower first and then you’d deal with the damage done.

“I’m pretty sure I don’t need to tell you this,” Sam stepped onto the treadmill, a devilish smirk on his lips, “But every time you call her that, I’m sure it’s the time she throws a punch at you.”

Bucky started at a slow jog and shot him a grin in response. He didn’t need to explain to Sam that the reason he did it was to make sure she stayed far away from him and all his baggage. They’d gotten too close the first couple weeks after she’d arrived at the compound, and the moment he realized there might be something between them he’d quickly dismissed the thought, starting the whole ‘kid’ charade. He was an old man, out of his time, who’d done far too many terrible things to even consider anything even remotely romantic. Even if it was with another agent who’d seen her fair share of shit and was living the same lifestyle as he was. One who knew who and what he was. One who…

He punched the speed on his treadmill, pumping his legs to keep up with the gruelling increase in pace. He was doing it again. Making excuses for himself - for the future he caught himself imagining from time to time. Calling her ‘kid’ as often as he could was barely working to remind himself that he was better off alone. Not that it mattered all that much. Nowadays, half the time she looked like she wanted to kill him, so even if he did change his mind  - which he wouldn’t - he was pretty sure she wasn’t interested.

“She’s going with you on her first mission. Did you ever figure out why Fury recruited her?” Sam asked between puffs of breath.

Bucky stared straight ahead, annoyed that he couldn’t push the treadmill further, “No idea. All I know if that if they waited a year to deem her mission ready, then they would have waited longer if she wasn’t.Though whatever the reason is, it must have something to do with the reason Wanda avoids her like the plague.”

“Well, she’s not me, but I’m sure you’ll be fine with her as your back up,” Sam laughed, though he was fighting so hard for breath it sounded more like a wheeze.

Bucky chuckled, “I can’t get used to having you at my back 24-7. You have to sleep at some point.”

“Unlike you people. All you supers are making me dizzy,” Sam huffed with mock seriousness, “Look at you. Are you even sweating?”

“I’m still waiting on Tony’s new treadmills,” Bucky laughed, slowing the machine, Nat’s warning fresh in his mind.

They kept on in silence for another ten minutes until deciding to call it. Dinner with all the Avengers and their families. Oddly enough, Bucky found that he no longer dreaded this kind of thing.

“What’s going on?” You demanded, looking up at the numbers above the doors that were no longer glowing.

Bucky’s eyes widened a bit as if he’d forgotten you were there but recovered quickly, “Even elevators in a place like this jam from time to time.”

You nodded slowly, silently wishing it would start moving again. You weren’t ready to be stuck in an elevator with a complete stranger - well, a person you’d only spoken to for about a minute. You’d arrived on the compound less than two weeks ago and you’d barely said a word to anyone and that was including Natasha Romanoff who’d been assigned to teach you how to fight and defend yourself. You were not ready for close proximity chitchat.

“You okay in enclosed spaces?” He asked, settling down on the floor and extending his feet.

He looked like he was settling in for a long wait, not one bit bothered by the fact that he was stuck in a hanging box hundreds of feet in the air. Of course, if you were as resilient as he was, you’d be completely at ease as well.

Thankfully, apart from your anxiety at being trapped with someone else, you were pretty calm, and crouched down until your butt was on the floor, your knees tucked tight against your chest. You stared at your knees, half hoping he wouldn’t talk to you and half hoping he would. Although you did it on purpose to keep to yourself, it was undeniably lonely. Maybe you could use a friend…you couldn’t remember the last time you’d had one.

“Just a little warning,” He began, his tone causing you to worry. You hadn’t thought there was anything to worry about, but the way he spoke made you wonder if you maybe there was, “If you ever get trapped in here with Peter, he will most definitely tell you about the time his classmates were stuck in an elevator. Every time.”

You looked up at him, relieved and surprised, “So this kind of thing happens often?”

“Weirdly enough, yeah,” He shrugged, a small smile on his face, “It’s the one elevator in the whole place that never seems to work properly, no matter what they do to it.”

“Would you be able to get us out if this thing goes down?” You were surprised by the question, but you didn’t know much about the others who lived here and the question had come out on its own.

He shrugged again, “I’d like to think so. What about you? Got any skills that’ll get us out of here?”

You clenched your fists, thinking of the pain on the redhead’s face when she had walked into that Hydra base. Controlling your powers wasn’t something you were good at yet and you were avoiding anyone else with the mutant gene until you knew for sure that you wouldn’t hurt anyone else. You’d been relieved to learn that secret serums and alien lifeforms weren’t affected - even though Dr. Banner thought that maybe your abilities could extend to even inanimate objects one day. You weren’t sure you wanted them to. Too many people had gotten hurt. It didn’t matter that they had promised you that you’d only be doing good from now on.

“Forget I asked the question,” Bucky said after your elongated silence. You were about to apologize, but it was as if he knew exactly what you were going to do and he wasn’t having any of it, “Whatever reason you’re here for, I’m sure it’s a good one. It doesn’t matter where you were before this…trust me.”

And by the way he said it, you did. If ghosts were real, you had a feeling you could have seen them hovering around him weights.

“I’ve actually got a more important question to ask you,” He continued.

“What’s that?” You were glad your voice wasn’t shaky.

“You know about Thor’s hammer, right?” Your nod was all he needed to continue, “We’ve got a debate going; if you put it in an elevator and it goes up, is the elevator worthy?”

You raised a brow, not sure if he was being serious or not, and when he smiled, you did too, starting to feel yourself relax for the first time since you got here.

There were three things you knew were about to happen in the next minute and a half. The first was that Clint wouldn’t miss; he never missed. The second was that, immediately afterwards, you’d find a small smirk on Wanda’s face despite her claims that she was not involved and was not paying attention. The third was the the commotion would get the rest of the Avengers, who were still in the kitchen, into the massive living space.

Thor’s booming laughter filled the room, shaking the apple balanced precariously on his head.  Lightening crackled at his finger tips, his eyes bright and his stance wide. Loki was in the corner, looking extremely bored as he picked at the grime under his nails, but occasionally he’d glance up, a slight quirk to his lips. Bruce stood quietly on the far end of the room, taking in everything with a slightly worried look on his face. Despite the number of adults in the room, he was the only one who looked relatively responsible. Your eyes kept searching the room for the same person they always did. Sam had his brow raised, arms crossed over his chest as he watched in amusement, and Scott stood by his side, a wide grin on his face. Bucky was nowhere to be seen.

Thor lifted his hand, index finger and thumb touching to create a small circle just above his head, right in front of the apple. No one was worried for anyone’s safety, especially that Dum-E stood nearby, fire extinguisher on hand.

“I thought I was done with parlour tricks,” Clint shook his head as he lined up his shot.

“Come on dad!” His daughter Lila begged, “I told Cassie that you could hit anything!”

Clint couldn’t hold back a smile, “Thanks for the vote of confidence, honey.”

“Are we ready?” Thor laughed, “Because I’m starving!”

“Here we go,” Clint muttered.

Then he released the shot. The moment it flew between Thor’s fingers, lightening cackled, setting the arrow aflame. The arrow split the apple, and still burning, lodged into the wall behind him. The kids burst cheers and Thor’s face split into a a wide grin. Dum - E moved into action. Everyone else, including Wanda, couldn’t help but smile and applaud along with the kids. You relaxed into the wall behind you, days like this making you so thankful that Fury had found you.

“Are you trying to burn the place down before dinner?” Tony asked, strolling into the room, “Because I’m pretty sure a flaming arrow will do it. The kinds of things I have to put up-”

You wanted to follow the rest of what Tony was saying, but all you could see was Bucky who had come in behind with Steve at his side. He smiled and mouthed the words ‘hey kid’ before going off to see Sam. Tearing your gaze away, you managed to catch the end of what Tony was saying, telling everyone that dinner was ready. Everyone else began filing out of the room, but you stayed seated, wondering why you couldn’t seem to behave like a normal person whenever Bucky was around. You knew you’d have to get your act together before the mission or else you’d compromise the whole thing and put everyone in danger.

Bursts of laughter exploded from the dining room and you decided it was time you joined. However, you let Wanda go first, making sure to give her a wide birth as she passed. She’d forgiven you, but you couldn’t say there was anything friendly between the two of you; not that you blamed her. Sam, Steve and Bucky were talking in hushed tones, lagging behind, but you walked away as if you couldn’t care less about him. You had dinner to get to and you were going to enjoy yourself.

“Are you in position?” Bucky asked into the coms.

He looked around the main floor, watching the rich party goers mingle and observe the artefacts at the silent auction. From his position at the top of the staircase, he could see everything except for the one person he was supposed to be on this mission with. Bucky was used to missions where he barely had any information to go on, but he wasn’t used to rely on a person whose abilities were classified - even to him. Fury had told him that it was safer this way. Bucky had had no choice but to believe him. The only consolation was that by the end of the night, he’d know that much more about YN.

He scanned the room for her, but couldn’t find her usual workout attire. Of course, this being a black tie event, she was probably - surely - wearing something completely different, but it was hard to picture her wearing anything else.

“I’m following the target,” Her clipped voice came in through the coms, “He’s alone.”

“Don’t engage. Stand down,” Bucky ordered, taking off in a sprint.

This wasn’t the plan - at least not the plan he’d been given. His heart rate picked up as he made his way to the target’s office. The target - Jackson Cure - was deadly, an inhuman with mind manipulation and telepathy and YN was about to walk in there, alone. He swore and picked up the pace, ignoring the pointed glares in his direction.

He raced up the stairs, going so fast that he almost came face to face with the target himself. Before Bucky could even get a punch in, he lost control of his body. Fear crashed over him. He struggled to regain control, refusing to let something like this happen to him again, but his hand was reaching for his gun and he knew it wasn’t because he was about to shoot the target.

“You’re a strong one,” Cure purred, eyes lighting up at the challenge.

Bucky grit his teeth, fighting a loosing battle. From the corner of his eye, he noticed YN creep up from behind. He tried to warn her, get her to leave before anything happened to her, but his mouth wouldn’t work. He only succeeded in making Cure notice that something was up.

Cure turned and practically laughed when he saw her, “Come to join the fun then?”

She lifted her gun, pointing it at his head.

“I don’t think so, darling,” He grinned, “Why don’t you kill him instead?”

Bucky felt his body still despite his futile attempts to move. The only thing he could do was look at her and try to convey a million different things before she pulled the trigger.

But she didn’t.

“Lie down on the ground and put your hands behind your head,” She snarled, eyes flaring with hatred, “Do it now.”

Cure’s brows furrowed in what seemed like a mix between confusion and concentration.

She clicked the gun, “I said, do it now.”

“Your friend,” He started.

“You won’t do a damned thing to my friend,” She took a step forward, looking like she really would shoot him.

Before Bucky knew what was happening, Cure doubled over, howling in pain. Suddenly, he could move again, sucking in deep breaths of relief. But all he could do was stare dumbfounded at YN, who stood coldly a few feet away from Cure, watching. No, not watching. She was the reason he was in pain.

She stepped forward and his howls turned to groans. He watched as Cure tightened in a ball on the ground, looking like he was about to pass out.

“Sergeant Barnes,” He barely recognized her voice, but somehow it was enough it pull him out of his stupor, “Are you all right?”

He nodded.

“Then I need you to cuff him. Romanoff is waiting on the roof,” She spoke clinically, but her eyes kept darting toward him as if she was worried.

He followed her order, still out of breath and trying to piece his mind back together again. Cure was still in pain, but he couldn’t risk telling her to ease whatever it was that she was doing. Not right now.

When they made it to the roof, Bucky had regained most of his composure, but he noticed YN had sweat dripping down her temple. Cure was cuffed, but they didn’t know if it was safe for her to let go of her hold on him.

Nat slid open the helicopter door, “You can let him go,” She shouted over the sound o the blades, “His abilities won’t work with the cuffs on.”

YN looked skeptical but did as she was told, Cure sucking in a deep breath despite the fact that he was still powerless. She swayed and Bucky shot out his hand to steady her. She only stared at him, a look in her eyes he didn’t think he’d ever begin to understand.

“The limo will be here in a half an hour,” Nat continued, eyes darting between them, “Make sure you’re seen on the way out.”

They both nodded, watching util the helicopter was out of sight.

“Are you okay?” She asked.

He thought so. Though he knew he wouldn’t be is she hadn’t been there. Hell, she’d practically taken care of this whole thing singlehandedly. She may have been the new recruit, but there was no way he could get away with calling her kid anymore. Bucky didn’t know what would have happened if Cure had had the chance to poke around in his head longer than he had. He shuddered at the thought, trying to push it far away.

“I was supposed to have him subdued before you got there,” She continued when he said nothing, “That’s on me.”

Stunned, her realized she was trying to apologize to him. After everything she’d just done for him, she was trying to apologize.

“You saved my life. That’s on you,” He stated firmly, “I can never thank you enough for that, so please don’t apologize.”

She sighed, “Are you sure you’re all right?”

“I’m fine,” He said, turning to face her, “Thanks to you - holy shit.”

He stared at her, at a loss for words. Amidst all the action, he’d never really taken a good look at her. He’d known she was there, but hadn’t needed to know more than that.

“What?” She demanded, voice panicked as she whirled around to find the threat, “Bucky, what?”

He couldn’t help but stare at her in her gown. It was as if every feeling he’d pushed down since the day they’d met came rushing back to the surface, only to mix with the leftover adrenaline to hit him like a tidal wave. YN had always been beautiful, but tonight she was something else, coming through for him with confidence and kindness like he’d never seen at the compound. Bucky also had to admit that he’d always had a soft spot for a woman in a pretty dress.

Yet, all that managed to come out of his mouth was, “You look beautiful,” Which felt kind of lame and very much an understatement.

She stared back at him, an expression on her face he couldn’t read, then looked down at the dress she was wearing.

Finally, she shrugged, “You have Nat to thank for that. She picked it out.”

He extended his arm, trying to sort through all his emotions while not being able to help himself, “A dress is only as beautiful as the woman wearing it.”

His words caught him by surprise, the familiarity of them like a long lost friend he hadn’t seen since the forties. He knew he would never be the person he was before the war, but maybe he could find away to be something else; something different, but just as good.

You were dreading working with SHIELD and living on Tony Stark’s compound. It wasn’t that you wanted to keep being blackmailed by Hydra - working for them against your will - but you were pretty sure these people wouldn’t accept you. They were all heroes. You were…you were a coward who couldn’t fight her way out of a shitty problem.

Fury didn’t say a word. You weren’t sure if it was because small talk wasn’t his thing, if he was ignoring you, or if he was being nice and giving you you space. Either way, you were glad for it. You weren’t sure what to say. After almost killing one of his team members the night they’d raided the Hydra compound you were on, the only thing you’d been able to say had been a string of apologies. The only break in your profuse apologies had been the moment you’d agreed to work for him, both a penance for your actions and a freedom from the situation you’d been stuck in.

When you followed him through a set of clear, double doors, you were hit with the bustle of what felt like a small city. Not only were there soldiers smiling about, but there were women dressed in suits - both regular and some like you’d never seen before - men in jumpsuits, people with clipboards, screens above-head with flashing lights and what appeared to be a mechanical bird swooping precariously in and out of the crowds.

“You can’t be a bazaar half your flock is gone loose!” A laughing voice shouted, “You’re going to have to catch that thing before it pokes someone’s eye out!”

“Shut up and start helping me!” A different, much less amused, shouted back.

You searched for the voices, but couldn’t find the men they belonged to amid the crowd.

Fury muttered beside you, “They’ll both lose an eye if that thing takes out mine.”

You smirked, the action taking you by surprise.

Two men then stumbled into the room, shooing the bystanders out of the way. The crowd parted with little more than an eye-roll . The long haired one raised a gun but didn’t get to fire off a shot.

The man with wings strapped to his back gripped his friend’s arm and glared at him, “You kill that thing, the guys in tech are going to kill you.”

“How do you want to get it then?  Because last I checked, you weren’t able to fly this model,” He retorted, shaking him off and taking aim again.

“If one of you fires a damn shot,” Fury warned, his voice no louder than it was before but easily carrying across the room, “I don’t care how accurate it was, you’re going to wish you didn’t.”

In unison, they turned their heads, noticing Fury for the first time. The bird swooped toward them and you almost cried out to warn them, watching as it aimed for the long haired one’s head but his hard shot out, the clang of metal on metal ringing out through the room. You blinked, not sure you’d seen correctly, but knowing in a place like this there was no way you were imagining things.

Wings grinned, noticing you, “See you’ve brought a new recruit.”

They wandered over, blue and brown eyes trained unnervingly on you.

You looked down instinctively at the bracelet they’d given you only a week ago. Judging by the pain free looks on their faces, it was working fine.

“No need to look worried,”  Wings shot you another grin, this one more welcoming, “There are only idiots here who sometimes manage to save the world from time to time.”

What little good mood you’d found at watching them chase after that metal bird vanished quickly. None of the work you’d done for Hydra had anything to do with saving lives…And that was the big problem, wasn’t it?

“Maybe she should be worried,” Blue eyes said, and you stopped breathing thinking that he knew who you were and what you’d done, “She’s going to have to work with you and your unruly birds from time to time.”

Wings rolled his eyes, “Wait until she sees the Spiderkid or Lang.

“You’ll be fine here. Trust me," Long-hair shot you a small, knowing smile, that eased the pressure off your chest as he extended his hand, “I’m James and this is Sam. But you can call me Bucky.”

You didn’t know what to think about Bucky’s reaction. You were part worried, part thrilled, and also riding the high that came from finally being able to loosen the cap that you kept on your powers. You didn’t know what the hell to think.

So, arm in arm, you followed him back down to the auction. He was silent the whole way, almost contemplative, so you said nothing. The fury you’d felt at seeing that man get inside Bucky’s head and then try to kill him…It had been so blinding you were surprised you’d managed to keep hold of your powers long enough to keep him alive. You could still feel it simmering beneath the surface, threatening your hard earned control over your ability. The bracelet was in your clutch, but you’d promised yourself you wouldn’t ever need to use it. You never knew who could be in the vicinity and you couldn’t risk what you’d done to Wanda happen tonight.

“Bucky,” You whispered when you walked out onto the quiet sidewalk. You weren’t sure what you wanted to say, his name having slipped out as if on its own.

His gaze found yours, searching as if to make sure you were all right. The look wasn’t the same as the one he’d had on his face earlier, but it still sent shivers down your spine anyways, “YN? Are you cold?”

You shook your head, not sure what to do or say.

He dipped his head, trying to get a better look at your face.

“Are you hurt?” The words were a deep growl, surprising you.

After the way he’d looked at you when you’d saved his life - as if he was truly seeing you for the first time - you were taken back to that moment in the elevator when you’d thought there was something between you. But you pushed the thought away. You were just a kid in his eyes, SHIELD’s newest recruit. Whatever you’d thought you’d seen was only what you were hoping to see there. Nothing more.

“No. No I’m fine,” You muttered, forcing a smile, “The limo’s here.”

Something flickered across his face, but you ignored it, shoving out of his grip to get into the car. You melted into the seat and closed your eyes, leaning your head back against the headrest. You heard him get in and felt the limo take off.

“YN?” He murmured.

You opened your eyes and slide a glance his way, “Yeah?”

“I never did thank you for saving my life.”

You shrugged, “You would have done the same for me.”

“I would have,” He said forcefully, “Every damn time.”

There was something in his voice that made your breath catch in your throat, and you turned so that you were fully facing him. He leaned in closer.

“I mean it,” He whispered.

You felt yourself getting sucked in, but pulled back just in time, “Good thing for you that this kid can take care of herself.”

His brow furrowed, “What I saw out there was the work of a powerful woman who looked absolutely beautiful while being completely badass. You’re no kid, trust me.”

You stared at him, confused. He was telling you the exact opposite of what he’d been telling you for the past several month. It was hard to believe that doing your job could have changed his mind unless…he’d always believed the same thing? You were so confused. You didn’t know if you were simply imagining things or if this was real.

“Exactly,” You said, opting for humour to try and avoid your feelings, “I’m no kid. You’re just old.”

The corner of his mouth lifted and you found yourself being drawn in again.

“Good thing then, that that’s only technically. I’m pretty sure we’re actually the same age,” He whispered.

You were having trouble tearing your attention away from his eyes and murmured, “Why’s that a good thing?”

He answered by sliding his hand around to the nape of your neck and closing the distance so that his lips were on yours.

“You could always wear that dress around the compound, you know,” He joked when he pulled away, fingers trailing over the edge of the material until they rested on your thigh, “Practice fighting while dressed undercover.”

You laughed though the sound was cut off by the feeling of his lips on your neck, “How considerate of you, but I’m going to stick to my usual clothes.”

You felt his smile on your skin, “I’m not good at keeping my eyes off you either way.”

#bucky #Bucky Barnes #james buchanan barnes #bucky fanfic #bucky fluff #bucky fanfiction #marvel fic #MCU fic #fan fiction #fanfic

[dex-xe]

I’ve made Spotify playlists inspired by each of the ghosts and I’ve made these little written pieces to talk about them. if you wanna read them, please go ahead - if not then enjoy the music!!

This is Pat's playlist:

Dancing In the Dark - Bruce Springsteen

A 1984 hit that Pat definitely would have loved, it’s brilliant tbh.

I Will Follow You into the Dark - Death Cab for Cutie

Poor Pat. I feel so sorry for him having to leave his family so young, like as someone who lost a parent very young (although I’m assuming slightly older than Daley would’ve been) it breaks my heart to see Pat’s family turn up at Button House. I’ve been to the place my parent died a number of times since and every time it makes me feel kinda sick. It’s an interesting idea for the show to explore, sometimes I forget just how dark this show actually is but like it’s a comedy but it’s literally about the trauma of death like???

Kids In America - Kim Wilde

I too adore Kim Wilde, Pat.

Dance With Me - Alphaville

RIP Pat Butcher you would’ve loved this song. Like Pat’s a dancing king as has been shown in ALN (one of my favourite episodes O.o) and that’s legit one of my favourite scenes where Pat and the Captain are arguing on the dance floor. I say “naff off, you wazzock” more than is socially acceptable XD

Sweet Caroline - Neil Diamond

Pat was obviously a fan of Sweet Caroline, man was a DJ extraordinaire and a huge football fan therefore obvious. It’s kinda weird to imagine Pat at the local game on a Sunday afternoon but like he definitely did, maybe he took Daley a few times. More of Pat’s life please, Parent Pat plsss.

Radio Ga Ga - Queen

The Grey Lady is one of my absolute favourite episodes cause I think ghosts hunters are a really great concept for an episode and Pat trying to host a radio show is just so incredibly funny. Pat’s little “apologies to those still waiting for the pop quiz” is just so good. But yeah, radio guy.

Video Killed The Radio Star - The Buggles

More radio references but also, I think Pat (and Julian as well) are most indicative of the increasingly rapid passage of time through technology. Like when Pat’s like”knocks the socks off Betamax!!” And Julian says “that must be two CD noms max” or something (I can’t remember exactly what he says). There’s a thing called Moore’s Law that states that technology doubles in capability and halves in price every two years (I know that’s not right but that’s the basic gist don’t come at me) but that means that growth in technological accessibility is increasing at a more rapid pace every year. Anyway, I think watching Pat and Julian struggle with modern technology is so fascinating cause they’re so different to today despite only living a few decades ago.

Together In Electric Dreams - Phil Oakey & Giorgio Moroder

Pat would’ve just missed this and honestly big sad. Such a cheesy song and just pure 80s cringe and I adore it XD But yeah, “we will always be together”.

Dancing in the Moonlight - Toploader

I put this on so many character playlists (I have literally hundreds of private character playlists on my personal spotify, there’s legitimately tons) because it’s just a nice song and yeah, Pat would love it :D

Alright - Supergrass

This was more placed here as something for Pat’s scouts. Like the song is so often used to show young people having fun and being care-free and I just love the image of Pat driving the scouts out into the country and it being a superrrrr long drive and then finally they get off the bus and just run free with this song playing. I loved being in Scouts and most of the Masters were so much fun and I just really wanna see more of Pat making sure his scouts have a great time!!

Come On Eileen - Dexys Midnight Runners

(Dexys Midnight Runners are actually the reason behind my username on here…) But yeah just the 80s personified this song. And I hope your proud of me for not making the classic Australian Radio joke I always make when this song comes up… XD

December, 1963 (Oh What A Night) - Frankie Valli & The Four Seasons

Pat was born in 1945/6, right?? Well then he would’ve turned 18 in 1963. I always forget that Pat was not just an 80s guy like he was a teen in the 50s and 60s and then in his 20s in the 70s like that’s sick!! But yeah sorry, this is just a great song!!

(Feels Like) Heaven - Fiction Factory

Pat, my guy. My heart breaks in that scene where Pat really thinks he’s going to heaven. My. Heart. Breaks. I’m assuming the ghosts don’t know what happens when you “move on” but Pat immediately assumes upon seeing a bright light that that’s it for him?? Maybe it’s just based on films and pop culture that he’s aware of?? Or maybe it’s just because he was emotional and had had a massive revelation of sorts and assumed he would move on??

You Make Me Feel (Mighty Real) - Jimmy Somerville

Just a good song againnnnnnnnn, but also since Alison turning up like how incredible would it be to finally have a living breathing human who you can talk to. Like how real would that make you feel?? Like okay Jimmy, come back to me once you've been dead 40 years and meet a woman who half died and can now see you, then that's real!! XD

Don’t You (Forget About Me) - Simple Minds

I feel like Pat more than anyone is concerned about being forgotten but is also one of the least likely to be forgotten for the time being. Like he has a whole family who won’t forget him for at minimum two generations in addition to God knows how many scouts who will clearly not forget him. He passed on skills that they will pass on to others who will pass on to others like one day his name will be forgotten but not what he imparted onto the world. Okay got philosophical but yeah, you shan’t be forgotten any time soon Pat!!

Top Gun Anthem - Harold Faltermeyer & Steve Stevens

A great film, good choice Pat.

Wake Me Up Before You Go Go - Wham!

1980s icon George Michael. Just a fun song.

Somewhere in My Heart - Aztec Camera

Pat still loves Carol despite what she did to him… That is either an incredibly emotionally mature man or a man in denial who knows?? But this song is just so lovely, like it feels very pure and uncomplicated if that makes sense.

I’m Still Standing - Elton John

Having just said that, I feel like this is part is just kind of a fuck you. Like just a moment to be like ‘i’m still living (hehe dying) a good life (hehe death) despite what you did to me.'

The Wanderer - Status Quo

This is the song that plays when Pat gets into the bus after being shot. It’s basically just about being a player and hitting on loads of women, so not particularly relevant but it’s still a good song and I genuinely find that scene really eerie and yeah, *shudder* just find it weird.

#bbc ghosts #bbc ghosts pat #Spotify

[thatdamnokie]

so, as everybody knows, our man, the lovely mark strong, turned 57 this past august 5th

since the kingsman films have had a huge influence on several aspects of my day-to-day life (gee, wonder what group of people i could be referring to...), i decided to sit down and do something i’ve been thinking about since getting my medical card earlier this year: getting high as a kite and watching them back-to-back.

to celebrate mark’s birthday, i decided to do another running commentary post like the one i did for rocknrolla ages ago, under the cut. it’s a pretty similar style, which is to say not necessarily super coherent and might be hard to understand if you’ve never seen the movies. D:

there are some mentions of the roanoke society, but not many.

if even just one person finds this mildly entertaining for four seconds, then i’ll have done my job. there is a lot of cursing and this is NOT spoiler-free.

enjoy~

edited 9.1.20 to correct typos and such, please remember that i was Not Sober while i wrote this lmao

how many times have i watched these movies at this point? i don’t even know.  

i always liked the nifty like—retro arcade marv opening animation

and the thing with the tapes! we love book-ending devices!

kingsman: badass motherfuckers worldwide incorporated

like why was merlin even with them? i understand why lee and james would be there, but merlin, was he not acting quartermaster then?

i have SO MANY FEELINGS about lee unwin

i think it haunts harry and merlin more than anyone thinks, but these are fun spy movies so we just don’t talk about trauma and shit, don’tcha know

don’t look at how merlin tears up and tell me he doesn’t drink about it *HEAVILY* later

it’s such a stark contrast to see the 1990s interior vs. what it’s like when eggsy’s grown :(

michelle baby i’m so sorry. you deserved better than this.

and BABY EGGSY

omg. like this scene is both heartbreaking but is also adorable.

colin firth has gd anime legs, that dude had to straight up unfold himself as he stood up lmao

aaannnnd swooping logo, whooooo, goin’ over some mountains~

and mark hamill, ladies and gentlemen!

this whole thing with james deciding to kinda go rogue makes me wish that we knew more about his backstory as well. like, is this james being james, or was this a weird one-off situation and he was just unlucky?

YES unlucky. nobody could plan for the hurricane of sleek destruction that is gazelle

who has one of my favorite aesthetic designs as a villain (although i guess i’d put her more on maybe henchman level? but idk, it seems like valentine looked at her more as a partner, less like an assistant? and they had a very interesting chemistry together too, like i would’ve added more valentine x gazelle scenes)

i would LOVE to be this chill about just—draping blankies over bodies

blankies over bodies sounds like a cool band name

DIBS you guys can’t have it

i am SO GLAD samuel l. jackson gave valentine a lisp!

valentine, to me, does fit a lot of the usual spy movie villain tropes

but since this movie doesn’t take itself super serious, it’s more fun than annoying

and we never hear about any of the other knights?? like

half of this is just gonna be me whining for additional footage that there just wouldn’t have been room for realistically lmao

michael caine, you are lovely

MARK STRONG, LADIES AND GENTLEMAN

WITH LEGS THAT DON’T QUIT AND AN ACCENT THAT I’D DIE FOR

i’m an embarrassment

like let’s all stop and thank god that mark didn’t have time to learn the welsh accent

not that i would’ve been disappointed, because all accents are good accents on this blog

but at this point i can’t imagine merlin as—not scottish

“try picking a more suitable candidate this time”

arthur you DICK

like were you this cold-blooded when lee died, you fuckin’ reptilian-ass son of a bitch

no wonder you were charlie’s pledge person thing

and enter the fabulous taron egerton, stage left!

DEAN you are DISGUSTING

god, michelle, you need better friends, if you were my bro this entire relationship would’ve never happened

;-; and eggsy’s so sweet with his sister! i know there probably wasn’t “room” for it but i AM glad that there are scenes showing that family is one of eggsy’s kinda “core values”or whatever you want to call it

dude is a hufflepuff through and through imo

can you imagine eggsy as a villain? we would be so fucked. he’s sly, he’s smart, he could’ve made life v e r y difficult for lots of people if he really wanted to

but look at him with the squad!

eggsy’s just like the british version of a good ol’ boy

this car scene is some dukes of hazzard bullshit (ramp-jumping and fun car horn aside)

if butterflies are harry’s main symbolic critter, would foxes be eggsy’s? or would it be a pug instead? i guess that’s like asking if harry would be either a butterfly or a cairn terrier, like mr. pickle. let’s say both.

this fandom is pretty on top of character associations like that

you get symbolic associations! YOU get symbolic associations! EVERYONE gets symbolic associations whether they’re actually in the canon or not! don’t have any? don’t worry, we’ll assign you at least one!

the guy playing the interviewing officer is ALSO the patriarch in the witch which i didn’t realize until—like, a while after

and it was while @circlesofbone​ was visiting, and we were just “oh, okay, guess we can’t escape this cast at all, this is fine”

“your father saved my life.”

harry you’re such a fucking peacock, waiting all posted up and posing so you’ll look cool

you big doofus

i’d kill to be inside his head during this first conversation with eggsy though

like is eggsy like lee? is harry seeing lee the entire time he’s talking to his son, in his mannerisms, how he carries himself, how he speaks?

or is eggsy the opposite? which—i don’t know if that would somehow be sadder?

there’s just a lot going on in the background of this bit that’s left up to interpretation

“although i’m sure it’s well-founded—“

harry’s just so casual about this entire thing, nobody’s that casual without practice

harry you rabble-rouser, what kind of life have you led

“manners. maketh. man.”

our timeless motto, my flowers

kingsman STILL to this DAY has some of the most well-choreographed fight scenes i’ve ever seen??

like yeah the church scene but even just this initial bar fight

harry could’ve been a dancer

in a way i guess he already is

like he moves so fluidly and gracefully, it is BONKERS

colin you did so good! i’m so proud!

the way eggsy’s just O.O

whether or not you ship hartwin, like, you gotta admit, that was hot

and his BODY LANGUAGE, he’s sitting like RAMROD straight, this poor dude lmao

nobody prepares you for a situation like that in public school is all i’m saying

harry, exiting stage left like a suave, smooth motherfucker

remember when iggy azalea was relevant

ugghhhh i hate this part

“I WASN’T WITH NO ONE”

can you imagine being harry hart listening to your dead friend’s son getting the shit beat out of him

like, surely he heard the cleaver, he knows dean was going to fucking gut eggsy right?

listen to how cold and icy his voice gets, oof

yeah, he’s pissed, and dean is lucky

PARKOUR

ugh, i want to go to london ;-; i want to walk in front of the shop and visit harry’s house and kiss cute english boys

i’d like to think harry’s super excited to show eggsy everything but he’s gotta keep it dialed back because “decorum”

the way eggsy pauses though

“come on.”

and he says it so softly.

if i was eggsy, i’d be nervous, too.

but i didn’t realize how quickly harry tries to give off signals like “hey there’s no reason to be scared.”

“like my fair lady?” “well, you’re full of surprises.” <3 one of my favorite sceneeesss.

harry’s voice is so soothing but eggsy is so freaked out by the elevator that he’s just—there’s no room for anything else beyond processing the elevator lmao

“how deep does this fucking thing go?” asking the real questions

aannnddd KINGSMAN BULLET TRAIN

i’d like to think they have like soft jazz or something playing in there

and then they get to the hangar and there are obviously a buuuuunch of people out on the tarmac that we just—never hear about? i just assume they’re all like technical officers or maybe other agents

“your father had the same look on his face. … as did i.”

harry is already rooting for him.

“late again, sir.”

that. brogue.

fuck, i could listen to him talk for hours, scottish accents are my favorite thing

#squadgoals

not a very diverse cast :/

the body bag speeeeech

and of course nobody was in any actual danger, but merlin doesn’t want them to know that so he becomes mr. hard as steel, i am emotionally stoic at all times, do not test me you bunch of rugrats

“classic army technique.”

ROXY

ROXY I WANT TO JUST HOLD YOU IN MY ARMS TT.TT

aannnnddd charlie, also

who we might’ve found sympathy for if we knew aaannyytthiinnggg else about his backstory

like, could he just be Like That, yeah

but most people i know who are assholes like that are that way because their parents were first /shrug/

can hardly fault the dude for turning out like that when poison was all he was given to drink

anyone else a hundred percent positive they would’ve drowned in the first trial

i would absolutely have panicked and bit it

but then again, i’m not kingsman material, i’m roanoke

and if this is the exact same test that merlin and harry went through, does that mean there might be some weird drowning trauma hidden back in there that’s just ANOTHER thing we’re not gonna talk about?

(yes the correct answer is yes)

god that’s such an american response to the problem though

glass can’t cause problems if it’s in a million pieces!

“yeah you can wipe those smirks off your faces…”

i wonder if there was ever a situation where a trainee actually drowned

and i don’t mean like amelia, i mean some poor kid who just failed the test

merlin knows how to put the fear of god in people though!

and mark strong, very handsome, yes, very scary, also yes

he and colin both look like they’re 80 percent leg in every single scene

harry literally had brain matter smatter ALL OVER HIS FACE and still somehow had the mental facilities to be aware of those dudes, leave a bomb and dive out of a window (and then escape said dudes)

billy badass, y’all

“just get it done.” okay, i took back what i said earlier, maybe he does see her as more of an assistant, less than a partner. their relationship is weird.

the puppy scene!

“it’s a bulldog innit?”

YASSSS the golden trio

because of what happened with our other canon charlie has become a weird character for me to watch, like, yeah, i “watch” charlie be himself in tss but the charlie i “see” is like—”our” charlie.

“bollocks!” and then he just runs with jb in his vest, makes me smile

aannddd we see valentine’s super cool factory

harry your hair gets so long <3

“water!” wow, who wants to bet that the fact he was instantly screaming means that maybe he’s gonna have some stuff to talk about in therapy later

roxy baby i’m sorry they made you hold the balloon and have to trust these dumbasses to not shoot you on accident

i would trust roxy to not shoot me

i love, love love valentine’s house

it’s gorgeous

set design is always such a cool way for filmmakers to include details about a character using pure aesthetics and i’m such a slut for it

tilde!

see also: one of the characters done the WORST by these movies imo!

the fact that she not only says no, she says no with enthusiasm and gets blatantly pissed, is one of the best insights we get into tilde’s character and then it just—gets wasted

like it takes three steps and then gets mowed down in the hallway like her guards

i would never be given the opportunity to be asked if i wanted an implant but i draw the line at having stuff put into my neck

awwww harry’s so proud!

that finger point “yeah, see, be more like your uncle”

merlin is SO TALL

“a bit much innit?”

he’s just—tapping a normal clipboard

… nobody wanna talk about how that’s a normal clipboard

anyway

i also love how they show him in professor sweaters for the beginning acts of the movie

definitely a softer aesthetic than one would guess for a dude who apparently did field missions sometime within the past decade or so, but i also have a theory that lee’s death directly contributed to merlin maybe being the man behind the screen as opposed to afield

because trauma is a thing but this is a FUN movie so we’re NOT gonna talk about it

“you’re gonna be all right. you’re top of the class!” this was the scene that made my mom a reggsy shipper

regardless of how you feel about them as a couple, their friendship is one of the best things about this movie, along with their dynamic with charlie, asjdnaskdjna WHY could we not have had a trio movie instead

eggsy you show-off “lemme just throw my arms up and dip outta this plane like it’s not a big deal”

roxy you can do it!

ugh, there goes my baby, off to have a near-death experience under merlin’s immediate supervision lmao

“good girl, rox, glad you made it!”

guys, they’re just kids.

i love this big group scene because it reminds us that these are just young folks, still

“my, my, you’re all very cheerful...”

“rufus, come on!” dude eggsy—and not even just eggsy, charlie and rox too--at least made an attempt at teamwork. you get points for that bro

but man, for all they know, they’re about to beef it in a very permanent way, i’d be freaking out too

merlin getting caught up in the drama

because again, he’s supposed to know that eggsy has a parachute

i think he wasn’t prepared for these two to get that close to not making it and that’s why we see him break face and drop his mug

*WHAM*

i HATE the sound of them landing

it’s not like you can hear bones breaking but it hurts me, guys

and then there were three

plus one daddy long legs quartermaster

“if you have a complaint you come here and you whisper it in my ear.”

yes SIR

“you need to take that chip off your shoulder.”

merlin coming’ in with the tough love portion of the kingsman core squad

there’s no reason for me to think harry’s persona was inspired by cruella de ville somehow but i do anyway

she reveals the mcdonald’s and valentine is just :D

idk if he was expecting a specific reaction or was just excited to see a reaction period

valentine is definitely a fun villain, which, given the tone of the movie, makes sense, it’s all supposed to be fun

one of the reasons i love kingsman is that it’s like, this golden ray of goofy cinematic fuckery in a world of grim!dark remakes and other superhero/spy films who are presented as more serious stories

“and thank you for such a—happy, meal.”

harry got a puppy smile

but see, then, here at his house he’s a lot more relaxed with gazelle! like, patting her butt, etc.

maybe what we see of their relationship is dependent on setting, because valentine himself has it compartmentalized?

perrrrrrhaps

“and i am never, EVER GOING TO AGREE!”

tilde, you deserved better, and i think all the weird hate you get from our ohana is unfair

you don’t twist a runner’s ankle before the race starts and then get mad when they don’t win

your story was mishandled from the beginning

asmr: hanging out with the golden trio watching worrying news in the kingsman trainee bunker room

the way he says “biblical sense” lmao

i have never been able to figure out if the way he says that line is supposed to infer spiritual respect, or lack of it, but i might be looking too into it

“it’s an acquired taste, mate.”

what—what would you even do if you were at a club and three people as hot as taron, ed and sophie all came up and start talking to you at the same time

like i know the target got up and left pretty quick because of the training exercise

but i’d be doing it because i’m ugly and if three hot people are all talking me up at a bar something is Bad and Wrong

which—the CAHONES on both eggsy and roxy

they both literally said “yeah i’m willing to die for this organization that hasn’t even given me a permanent place yet, what of it”

look at harry’s dimples in this scene, he is fighting a huge grin, he’s SO PROUD

i know that charlie’s response is supposed to be just more fodder into the “charlie hesketh is a tool” fire

but given that i’m not unconvinced that his home life wasn’t super shitty, like—

idk, this makes this scene a lot less fun to me. it makes it sad.

like, maybe charlie didn’t even want to be there deep down, maybe this was all for like, arthur, or his dad, or some other person he looked up to

and the way merlin looks when he tells charlie to go home, the way that he’s kinda grimacing? i’m wondering if he’s along the same kind of feeling. he’d know more about charlie’s history

have i also mentioned how much i love harry’s war room?

“YES harry!”

an evil plan is being born!

“true nobility is being superior to your former self.”

eggsy is still in his club clothes, so like—has he slept? y’all let those kids sleep after fucking drugging them, right? … guys?

“—when one is popping ones cherry.”

and eggsy is just CHEESING he is SO EXCITED

am i the only one who wants to learn more about the store clerk guy though?

he’s like the one person around who’s legit just there to run the shop

has no idea about any of the spy stuff happening

his name is donald, he’s married with three children and has two spaniels he loves

“THAT is sick.”

i would KILL for this room.

i don’t need anything in here for any reason but still

foreshadowing, foreshadowing, foreshadowing, more foreshadowing—

harry is such a NERD

“put it back, eggsy.”

the amount of self-control it would take to not have a sudden change in expression in that moment, omg

i wonder how THAT gets trained up in kingsman

“i guarantee it.” ha, get it, it’s a reference to that one commercial

“y’all—talk so funny.”

and this all means that they had a contact at that hat shop and got all that info to them before valentine got there, and somehow made sure he did end up buying a hat that they could also successfully put a bug on, how deep does this goooooo

“jack bauer?”

it says a lot about eggsy that out of all the jb’s it could’ve been, it was jack

uggghhhhhh of course they HAD to do this scene with eggsy with arthur

obviously harry couldn’t do it

i just think most of us would NOT be fans of arthur at this point in the movie, we’re all rooting for eggsy, like, he needs this moment with this other character because we gotta drive home that he’s an asshole

also—would have absolutely failed that test

and i’m not sorry at all

“welcome to kingsman--lancelot.”

i was really happy that it was a female agent who ended up getting the handle

aannddd more echoes of past scenes, man, nobody can say that this crew wasn’t intentional with their cinematography

when eggsy rolls the window down you can see his chest moving up and down, like, he is MAD

dean you asshole

so no wonder he gets so pissed that the car suddenly decides “nope, no, we’re not doing this, c’mon”

this entire conversation at harry’s house is—tense

and you don’t pick up on it the first time, i don’t think, but uh

i’m seeing it now

harry’s not just mad, he’s hurt, and eggsy’s furious but he’s also maybe regretting his actions.

it’s these two men who are rapidly trying to figure out their headspaces and trying to figure out how to navigate this situation with each other

and the way eggsy tries to apologize ;-;

kentucky is a beautiful state, actually

ohhhhhh y’alllll

we’re at the churrrccchhhh

we’re gettin’ closer to the coolest part of the movieeeee

it’s telling that gazelle was trying to make sure that they’d be safe

“… so hail satan, and have a lovely afternoon madame.”

the most metal lines colin firth has ever uttered on camera

the siren noise after it’s switched on bothers me in a way i can’t quite articulate

it might be because i have silent hill-colored trauma, who knows

FREEEEEE

BIIIRRRDDDDDDD

THE GREATEST ACTION TRACKING SHOT IN THE HISTORY OF CINEMA

but then eggsy and merlin are reacting aaaanndddd it’s—a lot less fun

because you realize that they’re watching their bro mercilessly slaughter innocent people and not stopping

and still not stopping

and still not stopping

but plot twist, i’m really glad they kept the track going, because if they’d suddenly picked *this* part of the scene to get serious, that would’ve brought the mood down so low that i don’t think there would’ve been any bouncing back

i just

how do people exist who aren’t attracted to harry hart

that man is a machine

and colin worked so hard to be able to do the scene himself, and that work SHOWS, that man cuts a FIGURE

i don’t know how they managed to somber it up just the right amount, either? maybe because they waited for the “fun action sequence” to be over so there wouldn’t need to be noise that had to be masked by a fun rock track?

“… what did you do to me.”

i cannot imagine what harry was feeling in that moment.

the way he spoke it was like he didn’t even have time to be afraid to die

“that tends to happen when you shoot somebody in the head. feels good, right?”

“no, it does not feel good!”

i love that exchange because we normally hear the opposite.

also—whiplash.

mark has this way of expressing grief without showing any—blatant signs.

like merlin’s not especially tearful, or crying, but his eyes look MASSIVE. and SAD. and he has just the tiiiiiniest tremor in his voice.

and eggsy, dude, like, we’ve all had it come on us really quick and suddenly it’s like your chest is pumping like a piston and when did it get so hard to breathe?

ARTHUR you REPULSE me

like look at how egssy’s shoulders sag when he realizes that arthur isn’t on his team

and in a way, this is eggsy’s final test as a kingsman trainee, imo

do you realize how quickly he had to assess what was happening and figure out what to do, all without arthur noticing?

“you are all alone. it is all up to you. remember all you have learned. good luck.”

it’s a very—almost horror-esque situation from that pov

and he passed with flying colors to go on his first true mission, because after he puts on the suit, that’s his visual cue of graduating, if that makes sense

that’s the knight putting on his armor.

“i’d rather be with harry. thanks.”

“so be it.”

*click*

me: *laughing at arthur’s big dumb stupid head*

… man i’d love a replica of that decanter and glasses set though

not to mention that eggsy recognized the flaws in arthur’s character and weaponized them, which is a whole other level of shit that isn’t necessarily easy; he knew that arthur carried the kind of pride that would leave him open

god, he looks so exhausted though when rox has him at gunpoint.

i think he was being pretty serious, about harry

sick helipaaaaaaad

that thing looks vaguely like a rock-‘em sock-‘em robot but in pieces though

more grandpa sweaters <3

man. you can see roxy swallow, you know she’s scared, but then she just sets her jaw and—

roxy baby you are the best i love you

i like the vintage vibe of the mountain lair

i think that’s another visual poke at the aesthetic themes of some of the older, og spy flicks out there

merlin looks SO LANKY walking back to the plane for some reason??

he stays until the last second for roxy. that’s love right there.

“a bespoke suit always fits.”

which can be good spiritual life advice too but that’s a separate conversation

“what the fuck is WRONG with you people?”

and his fuckin’ disco ball

uuggggghhhhh his speech reminds me of so many… “public figures” that i dislike

even though it’s obviously a bad thing that the chips are everywhere, i appreciate that phones and such are being shown in a positive manner (like, michelle talking to someone in the park, people at a ball game taking selfies, people at the beach, etc.) because i get so sick of that anti-tech boomer humor tbh

and the big reveal of eggsy in his suitttt

A KNIGHT IS BORN

“how’s the view?”

“hideous.”

you’re allowed to be crabby baby, you just let it out.

“lookin’ good, eggsy.”

“feelin’ good, merlin.”

merlin is so calm heading into the fortress and i don’t know if it’s because he’s very, very good at compartmentalizing and that’s genuinely how he is at the moment or if he’s that way through extreme self-control and effort

he can rock a pilot’s uniform though

just like eggsy can rock a suit

they’re both so handsome, help

i also wonder how eggsy’s feeling right then

like, i’d imagine that the pressure of having to perform a role to literally save the world would be enough to distract him from the bite of grief

that’s—probably enough to distract everyone, tbh

i a hundred percent believe there are breakdowns we don’t see

i wonder if eggsy told tilde he’d spoken to lindstrum(sp?) after everything was said and done

like, that’d be some kind of weird foreshadowing in hindsight

this scene is anxiety-inducing in a big way so to distract myself i imagine roxy as a mech pilot

dude i’d totally watch sophie in a role like that, like, let her be in a movie like pacific rim, she’d kick ass

and now we have The Chaos

otherwise known as that point when Everything Is Happening All At Once All The Time

also a thing that doesn’t exist in spy movies: hearing damage

because like his voice is right in eggsy’s ear and without it he’d have a LOT harder time surviving

imagine being an agent, merlin trying to talk to you, but something either hits your ear or goes off right next to it and suddenly it’s just silent

SYSTEM FAILURE

YAAASSSSS

WE WIN

GGOOOAAAAALLLLLL

THE AUDIENCE IS DOING THE WAVE

except JUST KIDDING

The Chaos 2 Electric Boogaloo!

merlin with a huge gun: hot, also, very scary

eggsy is just 10000% done

“this is mine. i’ll show you yours.”

i wonder who e man was supposed to be that valentine called.

like is that a reference to a real person that i just did’t catch?

… elon musk? maybe? idk

eggsy slides like a gd anime character

when he uses the rainmaker, it’s just like harry’s protecting him from somewhere else

(oh—wait, technically kentucky, i guess)

“merlin, i’m fucked.” you can hear the anger there. not only did he fail, but he—and everyone else—is about to die

but this? this is the pinnacle of eggsy showing himself as a kingman agent

he was staring death straight in the mouth and STILL

SOMEHOW

REMEMBERED THE IMPLANTS

so i guess if i say that the moment when he puts on the suit is when he becomes a true agent, then maybe this is the moment when he becomes galahad.

*bobs head to pomp & circumstance*

i remember getting a huge kick out of how colorful they made this

because in real life you know a bunch of people literally blowing up would be like—DISGUSTING

viscera everywhere

no fun rainbow mushroom clouds

“i’ve always wanted to kiss a princess.”

ANOTHER knight reference, very clever matthew

mmmmm Do Not Like that noise

aaaannndddd *that* line

which—maybe that’s mr. vaughn’s sense of humor, or what he thinks the sense of humor his core demographic has, idk

but it always kinda rubbed me the wrong way

the mass brawl scenes are edited so like--jarringly compared to the other fight scenes in the movie

that’s probably for a reason

also, a showdown to the tune of something disco: kind of another trope homage

this shot of gazelle is so sick, i love everything about it, she is so cool

this entire fight with eggsy is awesome tbh

we got a little bit of what gazelle can look like in combat earlier with tilde’s guards, but now we get this epic showdown seeing her at her full potential against someone who’s actually a challenge

and the way valentine is shouting for her to kick his ass from upstairs and yelling encouragement lmao that’s how real friends act when there’s a fight

daisy ;-; ugh, that’s the visual gutpunch that makes it juuuuuust serious enough by reminding us of the stakes

which is why it’s fitting that then we see the Slo-Mo K.O.

and that smile with the fun little chimes in the back, lmao

and eggsy, quick on his feet again byyyy being quick on gazelle’s feet—foot—whatever

man, impalement deaths are always fun.

coulda done without the vomiting but that’s also one of valentine’s quirks that makes him different from a cookie cutter villain

aaannddd have a heavy sigh from merlin

that dude needs a full-body massage and a drink

“is this where you say some really bad pun?”

reminder: i love that this movie is self-aware! i could not picture a super serious kingsman movie! i just picture something depressing!

there had to have been a better option besides—this, for this eggsy/tilde ending scene

i’m not saying i’m mad it ended with them fucking, i’m mad that the extent of the joke was anal and that was it.

also the idea of my boss possibly seeing me having sex would have me a little more concerned about the hardware on my face, but okay??

aannddd the tapes.

gah, we love visual throwbacks!

we love being able to see that despite all this growth and change, family remains very important to eggsy—he hasn’t changed into a different person, he has grown more into himself than ever before! THIS! THIS is eggsy unwin!

… GET READY FOR IT

time for tgc! (and to get into my roanoke feels, maybe, this is the nexus where our canons connect)

the BAGPIPES

okay

i did not stop to consider how unpleasant this was going to be to watch stoned but we’re gonna power through it and get through it together

if i cry i cry

the way the music swells into the main theme <3

and the perfect reveal for our boy eggsy!

reflected in gold, looking sharper than broken glass

and SUDDENLY CHARLIE

the pacing in tgc leads me to believe that matthew had huge plans for this movie, and a lot of cool stuff probably ended up on the cutting room floor for time

i also love that they brought charlie back

i love his voice box and his cool robot arm

and i’m not just saying that because it made it super easy to blend him into our canon, either, this is like—charlie’s evil twin in terms of his new aesthetic, the contrast is really cool

YYAASSSS THIS SCENE

WITH PRINCE PLAYING??

*CHEF’S KISS*

like we are IMMEDIATELY thrown back into the gold parts of it all, like how physics is a little broken so we can do cool shit like have a knockdown drag-out fight all within the space of a small cab

i wonder what would’ve hurt charlie worse—being thrown onto his organic side, or having all his weight land on his metal arm if it hadn’t disattached

but then he’s up and standing so i guess we’re fine?

MERLIN! <3

otherwise known as the character entrance that literally changed my life

i try not to think about it too much or i get weirded out

ANYWAY

(and to think i almost never even saw the movie)

Sick Car Chase, Bro

and as an american, like, everything’s on the opposite side to me, it’s stressful to watch a little bit

“i seem to remember in your training you were rather good at holding your breath.”

man, that’s uh—kind of a macabre thing to say, merlin

just a little bit

i’m not even gonna attempt to hold my breath to see if i’d survive this scene just assume i’m dead in that universe

we all live in a kingsman subarmine, a kingsman submarine, a kingsman submarine~~

“not boasting, but i trained him well enough that even he wouldn't mess that up.”

merlin are you okay??

gah, i love that chest-deep laugh though.

is it real love if they won’t crawl through the sewer to get to your house in time

i love that harry’s house looks basically the same

i know they talk about eggsy not wanting to change anything in the novelization but i haven’t read it yet so I’m not a hundred percent sure what all is in there

and we still get to see him hanging with his friends, and his girlfriend, like, this dude is still all about the family

“wwwwOOOOO!”

i love this group so much omg

for as much as he’s galahad, he’s still eggsy

the transition in the weed bag looks super cool

… oh, i guess watching this while high makes the main storyline hit a bit different

welp

i love that poppy is an aesthetic slut and really doesn’t give a shit about anyone’s opinion about how she makes her space

like, “i want a big 50s-style diner with a gourmet kitchen that i can cook people in, soooooo i’m getting one”

it’s also refreshing to see julianne moore in a bad guy role!

not that i’m super familiar with her filmography but i feel like i’ve mostly seen her cast as like a good guy?

i could be wrong

awwwww jet and bennie!

there’s so much to love about this set

cannibalism and the fact that she bulldozed jungle to build all this aside (suspend that belief!)

the breakfast sceeeeeene

it’s so bittersweet, for obvious reasons

and it’s more evidence that he’s not super ready to move on into new territory yet, like making new memories with tilde that ring close to home

“i wish i could have met him.”

and the way he has to turn away, ugh.

eggsy. i’m sorry.

tilde, i’m sorry, too. you had good intentions, but they lost against his pain.

michael gambdon! the new arthur we didn’t know we wanted until we got him.

charlie had a moral glo-down, it’s fine, happens to everybody

FFFFFF his imitation of merlin lmfao

man, poor charlie, like

you wake up, you can’t make a sound, your arm has been blown off and your family’s dead

like his reaction to that entire scenario isn’t entirely unrealistic, i’m just saying

also LOOK AT ROX

omg everyone in this movie can wear the FUCK out of suit, y’all

man, i’ve gotten a few tattoos that were exquisitely painful—i can’t imagine how much it would suck to do it with literal molten metal

dude this means clara laid on her stomach and probably screamed at the floor as she got hers D:

this kinda—riffs off of hannibal, a teeny-tiny bit

like we’re so overloaded with the aesthetics and behavior of a certain character so it’s like, we forget about the much darker parts untillllll there’s a mood change and we’re looking at that dude’s legs, to the burger this other dude puts in his mouth, and thinking “oh, oh dear, ew”

i love eggsy in the orange jacket <3 snaps for the wardrobe crew across this series.

tilde’s face, omg, she was heart-eyeing so bad. and like, that little proud nod at her dad (who was of course being Like That on purpose)

and roxy, coming in in the clutch, you are tonight’s MVP

uggghhhhh i hate this part

because again, it’s just--a bunch of bad shit colliding outside of anyone’s control

(it was also really jarring seeing the war room with blank walls the first time i watched this)

like—granted, you should maybe not touch stuff that’s not yours, but…

like we *just* saw eggsy and brandon in a very casual, intimate scene with each other, how can anyone get angry with brandon?

this is all stress-inducing

i remember being in the theater watching this and feeling like i was watching some awful slow motion car wreck and i couldn’t look away

idk what other story i would’ve wanted to see but i was NOT a fan of Sudden Death For Christmas, especially concerning roxy!

and poppy is such a *bright* villain, not just because of taste but because of her personality, which is another weird thing to have next to the cannibalism

gaaahhhh charlieeee your arm is so cooooool

this shot is gorgeous and incredibly depressing.

what do you do?

gah, and the way merlin comes out of the dark, like

i probably would’ve drawn a gun on him too

“you think *i* would?”

this scene shows 1. how much he trusts eggsy to not shoot him, and/or 2. how good merlin is at compartmentalizing, because this is an even bigger blow than harry’s death, and he’s following the protocol like it’s an art form

i hope that we see some reference to this safe in the next movie, that’d be a cool way to tie the narratives all together

“i suppose that must be upper class humor. … i don’t get it.”

reminder, merlin is working class.

if you’re a ho for this fandom and went and bought this whiskey specifically because of this movie clap your hands *clap clap*

and they proceed to just get HAMMERED

“country rooaaddsss… take me hoooooome…”

another reminder: kentucky is a beautiful state!

i would love to tour a whiskey distillery, that’d be super cool

“shame it’s not scotch”

again, with his weird night vale clipboard.

who would win: two highly-trained kingsman agents vs. one (1) cowboy

channing tatum, ladies and gentlemen!

“y’all look damn sharp!”

i am forever gonna be mad we didn’t get more of tequila in this movie, and not just because of roanoke either, but like, “that dog don’t hunt,” whatever he has in his mouth sealed a leak in a barrel, and it took him all of two minutes to incapacitate both eggsy AND merlin? hello??

i’m glad we’ll get to see more of him in the another movie.

“you know why the measurement of alcohol is called proof?”

just dumping it on their laps, so disrespectful

“—and you can go fuck yourself.”

eggsy fucking just giggling.

these two doofuses

also it’s hot to see merlin be sassy ngl

“HARRY!”

these guys have been fast thinkers in stressful situations but as it turns out, people being unexpectedly not dead can kinda fuck with your day

aaannddd halle berry, everybody! i love ginger ale omg

(and so does merlin, he is instantly enchanted)

;-; this reunion scene

i don’t know how colin manages to be two completely different people at once

like there’s a huge difference between former agent galahad and harry hart the lepidopterist and i can’t explain it

i really, really hope we see at least one little hint at kinsman’s relationship with statesman in the new movie, i just think it’d be really cool

in roanoke canon, there’s an office rumor that the nanobot tech used by statesman was influenced directly by the same technology developed by dr. wernicke in the outlast games. i still think it’s one of my better crossover ideas.

also

god bless whoever decided to get elton john involved with all this?? because i was DELIGHTED

i love poppy’s wardrobe as much as i love her weird 50s-land in the jungle

i also really love the main statesman theme? it reminds me of all those fun epic westerns

jeff bridges! :D

champ vaguely reminds me of my dad

“can you imagine us in the tailor business?”

and he’s super quick with the questions. my headcanons for champ are all over the place but one that i really like is that he was maybe a sheriff or in law enforcement before being recruited by statesman.

aaanndddd pedro pascal, everybody!

otherwise known as *another* character that this movie did dirty, that’ll probably come up in this later

imagine being harry hart, not remember all of yourself, and suddenly your entire room just—fills with water

that had to have been so terrifying, and it was just as hard for merlin to watch (and possibly remember something unpleasant)

and like

that sounds like SUCH bullshit, too, like “yeah we thought if you came close to drowning it would help”

which, is that what merlin meant, no, but is that what harry heard, probably

enter jb the second ;-; <3 sweet baby

tilde’s trying so hard. i see you!

aha, penis jokes.

and all of the unnecessary weird festival stuff, uuggghh

there are so many different things they could have done, like, all of this is just weird from the get-go

first of all, whiskey striking out? hello?? saying no to a man like mr. pascal???

not realistic

the way whiskey takes a shot as he walks away lmao, relatable

and poor clara, like, it’s not like she was asking for any of this D:

hmmmmmmm don’t know how i feel being a stoner watching other stoners get this blue rash thing when i know it kills some of themmmmmmm

i love charlie in his newsboys cap!

poppy has a little bit of a point. like, booze is way more dangerous than pot, as is tobacco. like i would never advocate anyone try meth or heroin, but i think weed and some hallucinogenics get bad wraps.

seeing a dude get torn in half in the reflection of elton john’s sunglasses is the surprising bit of gore we need to remember that oh, yeah, the villain isn’t fun, she’s a murderer

uuggghhhh the TENT SCENE

and, look, i’ll defend tilde forever, but i did NOT like the weird marriage ultimatum. i still think it’s a dick move, like, in that situation either decide to trust your boyfriend or break up with him

the tent interior is super cool-looking

and like, man, he tried, he tried to bounce D:

/sigh/ work hazards, i guess

mmmmmm we don’t need any of what’s happening on screen right now so i’ll just sit patiently and wait for it to be over

and like, there’s nothing funny about merlin and ginger being able to hear everything that’s going on, it’s so grosssss, poor ginger has to have heard some shit before to be so nonchalant about it

everything about this sucks

and then he tries going to the one person who he needs the most and having to deal with him still existing in some state between alive and dead

his body is here

but harry is not

“maggots turn into flies, perhaps you mean larvae!” :D he is SO CUTE

but this entire conversation, with harry still not remembering and eggsy trying so hard to reach him through the fog, is so depressing

like, i’d need a drink too

*and* a joint

i’m seeing my coping mechanisms on screen here folks

the way he comes up with the idea is kinda ingenious though

like, he’s looking at stuff to make himself bummed on purpose, but therein he finds the thing he needs to fix the issue

harry’s smile when eggsy hands him the puppy TT.TT

and then eggsy just becomes a stone cold motherfucker with no emotions

“no one’s sick enough to shoot a puppy!”

hi, flashback!harry

and as SOON as he remembers himself, it’s like his eyes are different, something about him looks like it did before kentucky

“… eggsy.”

one of my favorite movie hugs

and eggsy has to stand on his tiptoes because harry’s so tall

like yeah merlin and harry’s reunion isn’t as overtly emotional, but there’s definitely a sense of joy and relief there.

harry my baby ;-; much better with the sunglasses (and merlin was so close to telling him he looked spectacular)

“now is that any way to welcome a visit from outta town, moonshine?”

he! tried! to! defend! harry!

i hate that jack got a villain story line!

we could’ve had something so much better and infinitely more compelling!

“hurrrr durrrr morgan you just like redemption arcs because you don’t want anybody being a villain permanently” i also like them because sometimes that’s better writing, y’all sit down

“that is NOT what i call a kentucky welcome.”

i love so many things happening in this scene, like

we get to see whiskey kick ass, like yassss gimme those sweet action sequences and give us some character development by showcasing his fighting style

and also NOBODY shits on harry for not being able to handle the situation. both eggsy and merlin were like “dude we’re still celebrating the fact that you’re alive tbh it’s fine if you’re not back up to speed right this second”

you can really tell that this was penned by british people writing american slang because having grown up in the southern half of the u.s. i have never ONCE heard ANYONE say shit like “i feel like a tornado in a trailer park” lmao

and poppy’s fun little death threat infomercial, so great

“what have you done to me you FUCKING BITCH” oof, that’s a mood

!!!!! gonna be honest i kinda forgot that bruce greenwood plays the president

okay but save lives, legalize isn’t an entirely bad idea tbh

hnnnnnnng the scenes about people not being able to get into the hospital hits different in the year of our lord 2020 huh

… y’all i’m being weirded out by all this hospital scenes, this is unpleasant

i, too, wish i could pull a tequila and just be slipped into a chilly coma until shit wasn’t so fucked up

“the fact is, this presidency has won the war on drugs!”

THIS SCENE!

look, y’all can come into my inbox and call me a pothead, or a lazy stoner, or some third insult, but this dude’s VP is bringing up some very, VERY important points when it comes to any kind of discussion about drug use in the u.s.

am i drug-friendly, sure, but i’m more friendly to the notion that we stop demonizing addicts/users

harry looks fucking SCANDALIZED when he sees champ spit into his spittoon thing

i don’t think whiskey even brought up harry not being ready to return to the field in an insulting manner, he literally just saw him get his ass beat in a bar, but eggsy’s faith and loyalty are up there in the category of unstoppable force/immovable object, so here we are

am i the only one curious about the whole charlie x clara thing? because he’s definitely grown up a bit by tgc, and i wanna know how much of that might be because of clara

and he MISSES, e for effort harry

“so sorry about this—“ WHAM

and now that guy can say colin firth busted his face with a fire extinguisher, which is very cool

“*you’re* wu ting feng?” “… yes?”

“you motherFUCKER” ohhhhhh charlie maaaaaad

ginger and merlin though, #couplegoals

the only person more pissed off about the hallucinations than everyone else is harry

imagine remembering that you’re one of the top people in your field and you just keep seeing imaginary butterflies everywhere

like, yeah, i’d be pissed at not being able to do what i knew i was capable of, too

if it wasn’t careening towards a random retirement center, getting stuck in a wildly rotating gondola thing could be fun

nice tuesday afternoon activity

i would loved to have seen more galahad/whiskey field stuff

“you’ve got to be fucking kidding me—“

meanwhile, in the continuing adventures of eggsy and jack: shit goes from bad to worse like a formal spiral only going downward

their expressions as their both just SCREAMING always make me laugh

”that’s the first decent shit i’ve had in three weeks.” <- as does that line, that old dude’s just telling it like it is

eggsy’s comment about the antidote just reminds me of when boromir looks a the ring and says something like “all this for such a tiny thing”

dun dun DUN what are THOSE? hints that whiskey may not be who we think he is??

great. so excited about that. i say, rolling my eyes into the sun

“i’ll fix their wagons.” no one says that matthew!

i. love. this. scene. because now we get cool gun tricks AND the second most metal thing that happens with a lasso in this movie (we’re coming up on the most metal thing)

like please please PLEASE show us more lasso tricks in the statesman movie

“well thank fuckin’ christ i didn’t need any backup.” i wonder if whiskey’s acting angrier than he actually is to throw off the fact that he might’ve caught harry’s glance at him betraying suspicion

RIP jack

imagine the timeline where whiskey was never a bad guy and harry hart just blew a dude away for NO REASON

now THAT would be an interesting movie

because harry and eggsy, for all they went through in the first film, never had a conflict where it was harry in the position of mangling the ropes up

but of course eggsy would never, never tell merlin what happened because he’s still ultimately on harry’s team

damn, charlie, literally blowing up your girlfriend seems kinda extreme

“THIS is vital!”

and here we get to see the biggest difference between merlin and ginger

now, i know there’s extra stuff in the novelization about their relationship and i can’t talk about it because i have no idea what’s in the book

but!

i DO still headcanon as merlin quitting fieldwork after lee’s death

his comment is either what he genuinely believes, or maybe what he fashioned his beliefs into after stepping down from his field role, and ginger is just as sincere in her desire to break into that aspect of working for statesman

it’s like seeing the same character but in two points in time, and it’s really cool

that balance would’ve also been a fun aspect of their romantic relationship to explore but alas! ’twas not to be

colin and mark could both play slenderman

look at those limbs.

gracious.

also this facetime scene with eggsy and tilde T.T

that has to be so terrifying to watch when you know the steps of death and what they look like as they get closer

but it also puts a fire under eggsy though

“i’m leaving with, or without you.”

and of course they’re both gonna go because that’s NOT characteristic eggsy behavior based off of how we know he views family/squad

that’s how they know he’s being for cereal

uugggggGGHHHH and THAT FORESHADOING

stacey pruitt, attorney at lawwwww

hmmmmmmmmm

what does this conversation between poppy and the president remind me of

gonna just sigh into the void

and now we have harry and eggsy on the jet along with the BIGGEST LIE harry hart has ever told in his LIFE

kingsman and statesman aesthetics at least tend to be the same color schemes. lotta golds, yellows. browns.

eggsy, yeah, it’s a bummer your gf dumped you, but this relationship wasn’t very well-developed or written so i’m not as bummed as i could be

“… and in that moment, all i felt was loneliness and regret.”

harry shut the FUCK UP

you felt NOTHING??

you weren’t thinking of, gee, i dunno, EGGSY? or MERLIN?? your MOM???

like these lines from him just seem to come out of left field and i can’t even halfway suspend my belief long enough to come close to believing him

like mr. hart you just gonna be like that in front of jesus and everybody????

so, yeah, of course he’s on board with saving tilde! because he recognizes (apparently just right that second) that “having something to lose is what makes life worth living”

and i don’t know if they felt like there need to be some weird, deeply contrasting reason for harry to swing around to being in support? or something?

like

i’m forever pissed about this characterization and i don’t even know if i’m expressing my anger in a way that makes it easy to understand lmao this is fine, i’m fine, literally not a single person in this fandom ever believed those lines anyway, it’s fine

moving on

... and even if they WERE true then honestly that just makes me more excited about butterfly knife, because that means that harry acknowledged both the bad side of the coin, and also the side with rae on it (which would mean seeing her for who she was and also recognizing his feelings for what THEY were) and drew the ultimately correct conclucision that love! is! always! worth! it! let that shit in like a welcome guest in the home of your heart, and they will stay as long as you let them!

as SOON as he wakes up ginger looks a thousand percent done lmao

and the “process” that they use to wake people up or whatever is—interesting

because all it is, is trauma turned into a tool which is kind of a weird concept to see in a “fun spy movie” imo

and this is one of what i feel were like only what, two? glimpses we get into whiskey’s Tragic Backstory

and the other scene isn’t a glimpse it’s just straight up exposition in his dialogue :/

jack, i’m sorry, you deserved better than this as a character

i’m sure the name “silver pony” is a reference to something but i don’t know what

“lookin’ GOOD merlin!” “feelin’ good, eggsy.”

ladies and gentlemen when i tell you that i lost my pool-noodle mind seeing him put on that suit watching this in a theater, i--

ANYWAY

because now that i have the horrible burden of having seen these movies a million times

i know it’s more symbolic

he stays in sweaters so long, as an agent of the background, because he walked a man to his death

so it figures when he puts the armor back on for the first time in ages

he walks to his own

uuuggghhhh the minesweeper

i hate this

i hate it

i hate everything about the feelings i’m having while this is happening

*beep-beep*

“you move, we die.”

i HATE IT

but like, i don’t know, how preferable is this to the end scene we almost got, which was merlin dragging his newly-legless corpse through a doggy door?

because it’s been literally multiple years and i still have no fucking idea

they’re both horrible in their own terrible, awful ways

damn, matthew, it’s not often someone manages to come up with multiple versions of a thing and have every version be so gut-wrenchingly horrific, i’m truly impressed and completely disgusted

“do as your told!”

god

everyone just going through twenty shades of Bad Feelings in the space of fifteen seconds here in the jungle

and colin and taron do this thing where it’s like—their eyes go dead? like, there was a light here, it’s gone now

it SUCKS

oh

oh no

ALMOST HEAVEN

WEST VIRGINIA

… fuck

LIFE IS OLD THERE

OLDER THAN THE TREES

“… singing?”

this sucks.

this sucks this sucks this sucks

MOUNTAIN MAMAAAAA

TAKE ME HOOOOME

COUNTRY ROOOADDSSSSS

*THUNK*

and he even took off his glasses before he hit him, he had his end coming towards him and he was still a gentleman

TAKE ME HOOOME

COUNTRY RROOOOAAAADDDSSSSS

his EYES AT THE END

FUCK

… okay i had to get up and go for a lil’ walk

anyway

(and again, roanoke canon, fucking fixing’ shit left and right, because we’re the goat)

harry and eggsy look MURDEREROUS

MERLIN SAID KNOCK YOU OUT

it DID make the grand ending fun action scene a lot more satisfying

because like, without merlin there, that means harry and eggsy get to go full feral

poppy you big idiot you just robbed them of all their motivation to show any kind of restraint and now everybody’s gonna get blown up

except for those dudes who get kicked by elton john

which would be an HONOR first of all

(the part where eggsy’s using his gun and shield vaguely reminds me of the specialist, @bloodofthepen​)

and harry and eggsy just—they’re drift compatible! that’s it! the teamwork! the grace! the flow! my god!

eggsy vs. charlie: round like 4 if you count the first movie

it was also satisfying to see charlie’s new arm in action

we love fun robotics and gadgetry in this house

colin firth is really just not afraid to throw himself full force down a bowling lane huh

ugh, seeing charlie slam eggsy over and over again makes my chest hurt

the sound mixing on all these films is top notch which isn’t always a good thing T.T

ROCKETMAN~~~

that shit will never NOT be funny

a wild elton john appeared!

eggsy is indestructible, he can walk off anything

but charlie, charlie i feel really sorry for, imagine being attacked by a superior version of your own limb, i.e. something that you can’t exactly quickly remove from yourself, that would be TERRIFYING

harry + elton = dream teaaaammmm

“darling if you save the world, you can have a backstage pass.”

i love you elton john :(

i would have been the most OBNOXIOUS hype man in the background of the entire kingsman vs. poppy land face-off

“let’s make this fair.” eggsy you’re fuckin’ cheeky

and poor harry, all that lank just getting tossed like noodles

i thought the robot puppers were very cool

“for the record charlie i’m more of a gentleman than you’ll ever be.”

mmmmmm do NOT like this death for charlie

SUPER glad we fixed it

and another scene where i can’t stand the sound mixing T.T it makes me cringe every time

“i don’t consider genocide especially lady-like.”

and are we gonna talk about how merlin knew how to make heroin?

… no?

nobody wanna talk about that?

ugh that houndstooth dress is so PRETTY though

high!poppy is weirdly comedic for all of two seconds and then it stops being funny real fast

whiskey D:<

this is so dumb

this is all so, so dumb

“our agencies were founded to uphold peace, to protect the innocent—“

there’s that nobility again

is what happened to whiskey fucked up, yes

i’m not saying we have to completely remove that from his story

i just

literally anything but this would have been preferable

and then HOT DOG it’s one of my favorite shots in the movie with the whip where harry’s just chucking it away from his face like a bamf, YES

how great is this cover, let’s be honest

like, i’d be lying if i said i didn’t enjoy this scene visually

plus

HARRY GETTING PEGGED RIGHT IN THE FACE WITH A FRYING PAN

gracious

it’s one fluid tracking shot, so kinda in alignmentment with what we’re used to

some people get annoyed with repeated junk but when you can do it THIS WELL you can get away with anything

D:

but then jack

you did NOT desert that

yes, you were in dire need of an attitude adjustment but jesus

“this is for you, merlin.”

/ugly sobbing/

and tilde is all betterrrrrr ;-;

you guys did itttttt

COUNTRY ROOOAAADDSS

TAKE ME HOOOOOOMMEEEE

TO THE PLAAAAAACCCEEEEE

I BELOOOOONNGGGG

and the scene with jamal and liam T.T #wholesomecontent

poor tequila, after i knew that you would have a bigger role in another movie, i was less annoyed by the fact that they iced you so quick into the story

#FOX2020

“… now we’re brothers, working side by side.”

spoiler alert i actually love champ’s toast

“y’all shittin’ in high cotton now” WHAT DOES THAT MEAN???

and ginger becomes the new whiskey like she always wanted T.T

merlin is proud from heaven (or london, depending on which canon)

iiiiiii have mixed feelings about the whole wedding scene, which is probably because i take HUGE issue with the weird proposal ultimatum thing that happened earlier

but the way eggsy says “not a doubt in my mind,” he says it so seriously and i remember that tilde almost died

there was such good intention packed into this couple that was so badly written that i just

augh

“but it is perhaps the end of the beginning.”

there’s ***merlin! lmao i see you dude, they did you dirty

look

i was pissed off about a lot of things that happened in this thing but i was honestly hype seeing tequila at the very end walking into the tailor shop

like, yeah, i’ll stick around to see what happens in this universe but i’m gonna complain the whole time

GO JACK RABBIT

RUNNING THROUGH THE WOODS

and again, i almost didn’t see this movie.

… i think about that morgan sometimes.

hope she’s doin’ okay.

…

she’s probably not. D:

#kingsman #kingsman: the secret service #kingsman: the golden circle #kingsman tss #kingsman tgc #the roanoke society #kingsman: tss #kingsman: tgc #taron egerton #mark strong #colin firth #edward holcroft #sophie cookson #mark hamill #samuel l. jackson #bruce greenwood #pedro pascal #jeff bridges #halle berry #juliann moore #sofia boutella #hanna alström #statesman #weed mention #kingsman the secret service #kingsman the golden circle

[romanceismycallingcard]

2gether Rewatch ep 1:

I forgot that it starts out with Tine narrating for a bit.

Tine telling his friends about Green and how Green said he'll make Tine change his mind about liking guys

And his friends' immediate responses being Team Green! Is actually super realistic friend group dynamic teasing and I love it.

Tine RUNNING AWAY from Green KILLS me every time!!

And he runs directly to his friends, "Guess who I saw this morning!" 😂 I love their friend group.

Green handing toilet paper to Tine in the bathroom....... Yeah........

Did Green pursue P'Dim like this too? And it worked?? Or did P'Dim pursue Green?? Gosh, now I want like a prequel story for them.

Tine's friends saying he needs to start playing hard ball and then joking about football and baseball 😂👍

Tine's friends dressing up to scare Green! And one's holding a TOILET SCRUB BRUSH! HOW does someone even come up with that!?? It's brilliant!???

"I've taken a few boxing classes." Tine looking absolutely terrified: "Not just a few O.O" (poor bunny :()

Green's skinny jeans are so tight, but like 👌 nice

Green does not strike me as a fickle person. Did he really like Tine? I think he did, but like, what about P'Dim? Part of me feels like he just used Tine to make P'Dim jealous, which is awful and in no way helps Tine's low self esteem.

What's annoying is that Tine does straight up, honestly, and kindly tell Green he's not interested. Green just reads into everything and twists the truth. And won't listen to Tine.

He takes advantage of Tine's kindness and inability to tell him a harsh no, stop. Tine doesn't absolutely, concretely refuse Green and somehow that leaves just enough wiggle room for Green to squeeze in and manipulate the situation.

😂 I forgot about Tine's run when he escapes Green to get drinks 😂😂😂👌 it's the best thing ever. I love him so much. It's such a great little run!!

I think it's interesting that Tine acts happy/drunk from that drug and not just sleepy/dead tired.

Tine's favorite song is Together. Hmm. How fitting.

Poor Tine. Green immediately forgets to hold him up and drops him!

Okay. I can kind of understand the logic of "a fake girlfriend didn't work. Maybe a fake boyfriend will." Because Green is convinced he can change Tine, but what if Tine does admit to liking guys but it's not for Green? Then Green would be forced to acknowledge that Tine isn't rejecting him because he's a guy but because he's genuinely not interested in Green.

I think it's funny that they just had to shoot for the best of the best guy though 😂 why not just someone decently attractive? It worked out brilliantly for them though. The lucky b*stards.

Their little bulletin with a drawn portrait with no likeness at all to Sarawat with a question mark over the face 😂😂😂 and the sticky notes. Very professional detective work y'all are doing over there.

You know what's really weird. When I started watching 2gether, I had no idea who Toptap was but I knew Tine had a brother so I kept wondering who was the brother in the show during ep 1. Now I know who Toptap is and recognize him and I know that Type isn't even introduced as a character until several episodes later. But that was weird to realize because it means that since episode 1 was released I've watched multiple shows with Toptap in them. (Water Boyy, 3 will be free, rewatched love sick)

Sarawat is awesome. He's such a killer. 😂 And his friends are so great!! Gunsmile and Mike. *Chef's kiss*

The cast for this show is perfection. I love all of them. They're all amazing and hilarious and adorable AND amazing actors.

Posting a fake schedule for Sarawat was so smart! Too bad Tine and his friends kinda blew it for him.

Tine's friend Ohm (JJ) said he has a spy that said the schedule is a fake. Who's his spy???

Love the guitar music as Tine's running to Sarawat. How the heck did he manage to get in front of all those girls? There were girls on the stairs below where he and his friends were standing.

I really want to know what Sarawat is thinking when Tine just shows up right in front of him. He and his friends just walk away without saying anything at first. Why?

Sarawat's friends' reactions to Tine calling him an asshole 😂

What's super interesting to me about their first interaction is that Sarawat has been aware of and probably been watching Tine for a year. Which means he at least has some basic knowledge about Tine. Like he's kind, relaxed, cool (chill), etc. I wonder what he thought about Tine calling him an asshole. Not a great first impression, buuuuut~ it wasn't a first impression. Sarawat already knows that Tine is a good guy.

Is Sarawat just so introverted and socially stunted that he just has no idea how to interact with his crush so he's acting overly cool/cold to him?? I don't understand why he acts like that to his crush?

I just don't get it.

And then we get this wide shot and I love watching Sarawat's friends' reactions because I love their perspective on everything. But their faces after Sarawat says that and walks away are so funny! And Gunsmile's little wave 😂👌 (not the greatest snapshots sorry)

Guys I just finished part 2. This is bad. This post is so long already.

I feel like Sarawat got lucky because of how stubborn Tine is. Tine's friends are like, "let's find a different target." And Tine goes, "Nah, he's difficult so I have to have him now."

Tine said "email" so now I'm thinking about him speaking English and that Win lived in the US for a year and he's only a year younger than me and how crazy would it have been if I had met him? I went to a school that had a lot of foreign students. So weird. I mean the US is huge so of course the chances are crazy small, but it's fun to think about.

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

I finally understand how Tine's email sounded like he wants to kiss/sleep with Sarawat now. Got it. I was really slow on that, wooow....

Tine's dream is 👌

Sarawat's jacket is 🤤

Fun story (cuz this post isn't long enough already): before I started watching 2gether, I read a post about Tine's dream and that Sarawat turned into Green, but I didn't know Green was a name (and there were no capital letters to indicate that) so I thought that Sarawat must've turned into like a green monster or something in Tine's dream but nope! That's not what that meant!

After that email, I wonder what Sarawat thinks of his crush now. Lol.

I just noticed this bike statue 👌 I love public artwork so much sometimes

Aaaaaaaaaand now that I've noticed the statue, I also noticed

That when Tine crashes into the bush, he's somehow magically back at the statue and that little roundabout.

Aw. Okay. I'll give Green one (1) point. It's sweet that he got Tine and was sitting next to him with a smelling thing for Tine to wake up.

This girl Ann is precious. She's so cute.

This is the shared student number party. I'm a little confused why there are so many people there? Is it multiple student number groups meeting up?

Tine goes from 0 to 100 energy wise real quick! "I'm a chic guy. I like to act cute!" He is so cute. You all know the rest of that speech.

Oh I'm dumb! Sarawat and Tine are both new incoming freshman! Sarawat probably recognized Tine from the concert, but he probably hasn't even seen Tine since then! For some reason I was thinking they've probably had the chance to see each other around University. I'm dumb. So everything Tine is doing, Sarawat has no context for, nothing to compare it to or anything.

Tine.... Breaking the phone..... The cringe.... The secondhand embarrassment.... I'm struggling. It hurts. Oh the pain....

Okay yay!! EPISODE 1: DONE! 😄

I hope you all enjoyed my commentary even though it was very very long. 😂😘

#2gether #2gether the series #ep 1 #rewatch #commentary #rommie rewatches