#because even though bb is peaceful now…if it ever happens again i can’t fall into this routine a second time

[heraldofcrow]

Ok, I need to say something and get it off my chest while I actually have some energy.

I know what I want to change for the new year…even though normally I don’t really care for the idea of resolutions because to me there is no guarantee that the turn of a year implies change. I just think everyone should grow at their own pace and transform when they are ready. But my current catharsis just happens to be taking place now, so I’ll make it a resolution. A resolution about creativity.

My energy as a fandom creative has been incredibly low this year, which is weird for me. I have been in quite a few fandoms over the years, but the ones I actively decided to participate in were always fun outlets for me to improve things like my writing and actually make room for my energy. I used to write absurdly long analyses and metas in other fandoms for my own enjoyment and get into in-depth discussions with people about lore, story, themes, or whatever else would come up because that’s where I thrived. I was always the essay spammer lol. I miss the energy that was fueling me then. Something happened to it, and I wonder if it’s because I changed from “writing for myself” to “writing for the fandom” at some point.

Don’t get me wrong, I always loved supportive communities that help you grow and develop in some arena of art. I need that as a person because as isolate and introverted as I can be about my interests, I do have this side that craves the thrill of sharing passion and excitement with others. I love when I create something and other people like it too…I mean, who doesn’t?

That’s a huge part of fandom and of course I am here for that support system, but I don’t want to make my goal to be about supplying content for a fandom.

Just about a year and a half ago I started messing around with drawing for the first time in my life. I had attempted to doodle and scribble as a kid, but it was stick figure stuff. I never was serious. But the urge to depict specific pictures in my head was overpowering. I had to buckle down and watch some tutorials to get anywhere, but I did get…somewhere.

I don’t draw even slightly near the level I want to yet, but I’m glad I practice and learn new little tricks every so often. I just need to break down walls, especially the walls I have been hitting recently. These walls stop me from getting better. They kill my interest in writing. I have trouble responding to people and their conversations with me in fandom…when people express interest in my opinions, I shut down and hide. I don’t put the effort I used to into analysis or research. I am stuck and it is smothering my creativity.

My drawing and writing won’t improve until I stop being scared about challenging myself or being willing to branch out.

That’s my resolution. I need to stop doing stuff for a fandom. I need to smack myself upside the head and genuinely draw whatever the fuck I want and not to create content like a YouTuber. The reason I used to write metas or get into long lore convos with people so confidently is because I was passionate about it and not because I was trying to put something on a platform.

It’s not necessarily that I have been doing this YouTuber thing all year, but I know for certain that the stupid fandom idea of “having a role” or “being The Guy for a certain character” has craftily snuck itself into my head. I adore Bloodborne, I love my Bloody Crow, but I also fucking love Dark Souls, I love Demon’s Souls, I love Elden Ring, I love LOTR, I love Arcane, I love FF7, I love dozens of other films, books, shows, stories…

…I love so much and I want to draw stuff for all of it, I want to write for all of it, I want to express my thoughts on it. I am a subtle participant in plenty of fandoms if they aren’t too toxic, but I have restricted myself to Bloodborne because I felt “safe” about “creating content” here. I also felt a necessity at times.

But truthfully? I am going to suffocate if I force myself to restrict my creativity to one fandom forever. No, I don’t intend to leave it, because I do love it here and I want to still enjoy the community. I also still want this blog to be Soulsborne oriented while my sideblogs are for other fandoms, but that’s just for the sake of my own interest in organization, not because I have to. That’s because I fucking love Soulsborne and its fandom and I want to stay here to share and create. Not because I have to.

I have been hanging around the Soulsborne community for over ten years now…it’s just an infinite vat of creativity and inspiration. I want to contribute because it’s fun. I need to stop limiting myself to the ONE game though. It’s killing the ability to improve my drawing because I don’t truly always want to draw everything from this game. Sometimes I just want to draw knights from Dark Souls.

Sometimes I want to practice drawing armor and not Bloodborne style get-ups. I just want room and space to explore. There is plenty of variety in Bloodborne yes, but it has to be variety I am passionate about or I will half-ass it. I need that option.

It’s the same with writing. My writer’s block has been horrible this year because once I actually started sharing my fan-fiction for the first time, I felt that pressure of having readers and I wanted to make sure everything I put out was perfect. This kills my motivation. It’s utterly deadly. I actually am fine with my writing normally and am very comfortable with improving it through practice, but whenever I succumbed to the likely nonexistent external pressure, I suddenly couldn’t finish editing to save my life.

I need to be free of this and be able to enjoy my fandoms. I need them. 2023 was one of the hardest years of my life. I was so miserable so often, and it’s during those times when I really want a safe space to run and create. It helps me “regenerate.” But if I’m polluting my own safe space with pressure and worry, then what do I have left?

And so yeah, that’s my goal for this next year and the years to come. I want my old energy and passion back, to use this little online outlet to grow and learn more about drawing, writing, and whatever else catches my fancy. I won’t pressure myself about this either, but I hope it comes naturally if I take it slow and try to unlock my brain from the narrow way of thinking.

No more playing into a role. I just need to be free and enjoy myself.

#SO YEAH NOW I AM A PENGUIN AND NOT A CROW #lmaooo #i’m kidding #that would be hilarious #just taking a different role after abandoning one (help) #no but see crows are just ME #that’s different xD #It’s funny because 90% of me has never cared about fandom expectations or roles #but with the bb fandom there was so much drama once upon a time that i got caught in the trap of taking up a role as a form of armor #now that it’s kind of in the past…i really need to move on #fandoms are supposed to be fun…not warzones and i need to stop restricting my creative endeavors to them so much #because even though bb is peaceful now…if it ever happens again i can’t fall into this routine a second time #there is a lot here #but i’m glad i’m thinking about it #personal #new year #fandom stuff #CrowNotes

[sunarintoes]

Street racer!bf/gf headcanons

Note: this is set in the world of adkor - an ongoing series featuring the haikyuu characters as street racers! However you don’t actually have to read it to understand these headcanons (they’re just regular bf hcs with a bit of spice)

Includes: the main trio of love interests - Oikawa, Iwaizumi and Kiyoko

✗ As a bf he would honestly love for you to attend his races but would honestly be really scared for you. Like he wouldn't want you to be at the bleachers or a checkpoint alone because he knows he’s in a sketchy crowd and wants to prioritise your safety!

✗ So during the races where he’s not with you, you chill in Seijoh’s clubroom with the managers and everyone else who’s not racing or working. There you watch the race live on the large flatscreen that’s been divided into 12 sections - each broadcasting a different checkpoint or area. 

✗ OMG!!! He would definitely want to see you try on his uniform - wear his helmet or his jacket and he would literally melt for you <3333 Iwa my beloved. Not that he’d ever really admit that he liked it, but you’d know by the way his face heats up and he becomes a stuttering mess. 

✗ Speaking of wearing his uniform- omg he would absolutely die for you to wear a jacket or a hoodie of his to the races!! And honestly why wouldn't you? It smells good, it's comfy and if we’re being completely honest… you look hot in it! 

✗ Iwa is not the irresponsible type (*cough* Oikawa *cough*) so he would not! Absolutely never allow you to sit in the passenger seat while he drives in a race - even if you are a racer yourself. 

✗ Howeverrrr, if it’s just a chill day with the two of you, he’ll take you for a spin in his car - speed down the streets of Miyagi at obscure hours of the night or perhaps the break of dawn.

✗ Dates are so cute and fun with him! He’ll drive you to cool places that are probably abandoned or restricted/off limits and then he’ll treat you to a cute picnic. 

✗ Every so often he posts pics of you with sappy captions on instagram. His instagram is mainly just car stuff though lol :P

✗ Tries to keep you away from Oiks but you end up becoming besties with him <3, he’ll never admit it but he loves that the two people he cherishes most are close with each other

✗ Following adkor plot, if Yn ends up with Iwa he’ll likely be a bit jealous if they ever interact with Oikawa (because Oiks also fancies Yn for those who don't know). This may cause a strain on his relationship with Oikawa but also Oiks’ relationship with you/Yn. Eventually he’ll get over himself and become less insecure but it will take time. 

✗ He’s also jealous of Kiyoko, she’s so pretty and kind and loving and caring and best of all? She’s safe. Kiyoko does not endanger her life and she rarely yells and she’s just so peaceful. He just can't understand how he is so polar opposite to your ex and it makes him insecure - he’ll most likely be cold and distant towards her to deal with himself.  

✗ You've definitely made out in the backseat of his car :) 

✗ Oh! Also he lets you choose his air freshener. Calls it his “good luck charm.”

✗ How cute <3

✗ This salty class A bitch

✗ My misunderstood and emotionally vulnerable baby 🥺

✗ Ok I literally love Oiks he is so fun to write

✗ Oh yeah you both definitely got off on the wrong hand (like Yn!)

✗ Y’all hated each other and were so fkn spiteful but it’s okay now

✗ You’re each other’s emotional support buddy. A shoulder to cry on. He needs it and you do too (i mean, why else would you be here?)

✗ He has definitely taken you on a race before - you sat in the passenger side and it's all g don't worry bb you were geared up to the max - helmet and all. 

✗ Homie gets so jealous 

✗ Of everyone might I add. He gets both more jealous with Iwa and less jealous. It's hard to explain but he trusts Iwa with his whole heart and knows that he’ll never pull anything but at the same time he just can’t help that he’s insecure. He really hates it, he hates that horrible bubbling feeling of green fire that burns his throat like venom and he hates that it yanks at his heart strings and controls him as if he were a marionette but he just can’t help himself from suffering from it. Thats why he started going to therapy

✗ When you notice that he’s jealous - and trust me, you will, all you have to do is delicately lace his fingers with yours and wrap your other arm around his; maybe place a light kiss on it - preferably his shoulder if you can reach. This simple action is enough to calm him down and remind him that your love belongs to him - nobody else.

✗ Dates are wild and passionate. He zooms along the streets of Miyagi with a grin so large and so carefree you can't help but fall in love all over again with how at peace and genuine he’s being. He has one hand on the steering wheel and the other around you, occasionally he looks over to wink but then he turns back and and lets the wind from his open window run uncontrollably through his already unruly hair. This, ladies, gentlemen and esteemed guests, is a sight so beautiful and genuine that it would be burned into your irises as a core memory if you will - something unforgettable. 

✗ Y’all have fucked in his car without a doubt 😳 sorry bb I don't make the rules; he does. 

✗ Oh and, wear his jacket. He fucking loves to watch you parade around in something he owns :)

✗ Kiyo my beloved <3

✗ She’s so soft for you

✗ Honestly she’s surprised that you’re back with her, she thought that she’d never get a second chance and that you had already moved on from her but turns out she’s wrong as you're currently resting your head on her lap (cute)

✗ When everyone’s racing you two sit together in the Karasuno team room and cuddle while you watch the race go down on the large flatscreen. 

✗ You definitely eat snacks while you watch because duh, who wouldn't? The race makes you so nervous that you just have to sink your teeth into something to prevent your nerves from short circuiting.

✗ She holds your hand like she’s gripping onto you for dear life while you watch the races - she says it's because she’s nervous, which is true, but she’s also scared that you’ll leave her so she wants to hold you tight to prevent that from happening. 

✗ Dates are so cute, you go to small cafes and she does her manager stuff while you stress and rip your hair off over the complexities of building an environmentally friendly car. Honestly the whole time she sneaks glances at you and blushes at how cute you are when you’re stressed out. She won't admit it though. 

✗ PLEASE PLEASE reassure her that you don't feel any negative emotions towards her and that you love her. She needs it. 

✗ Okay if we’re not following adkor’s plot and you're a street racer yourself then she is going to be so worried for you! She will constantly check up on you before your race and hold you in a hug so tight you swear you’re going to die from lack of oxygen; though she only does this behind your team’s garage/locker room/club room because she gags at PDA 

✗ Definitely gives you the same type of hug after you finish the race. 

✗ I think she would melt if you wore some of her clothes or even an accessory. 

✗ Omg please drape her scarf over her and say “don't want you getting a cold now- or maybe i do because then id get to snuggly the hell out of you ;)”

✗ Kiyoko best girl and bisexual icon. Date her for warmth and happiness <3

#haikyuu #haikyuu x reader #adkor #oikawa x reader #kiyoko x reader #iwaizumi x reader #oikawa toru x reader #various x reader #various!haikyuu x reader #Haikyuu fluff #Haikyuu headcanons

[vintagedolan]

mixtape | track one

| masterlist | faceclaims | playlist |

Six. There were six different lines, tiny plastic tubes that hung down from the side of the bed, making the shape of a U in the air. Too many, but still, one less than yesterday.

“Is it alive?”

“No.”

“Is it a vegetable?”

“That’s oddly specific.”

“But is it a vegetable though?”

“No.”

“Aw shit.”

Indiana looked up from her hands then, brows furrowing at the small figure who had huddled herself under the thin cotton covers. You’d think, with how expensive hospital bills were that they could at least afford a real fucking blanket for their patients. Especially the kids.  

“C’mon now, watch the language.” She said. It was a half-hearted reprimand at best.

“You told me I could curse!”

“I told you that you could curse about your meds, there’s a difference.”

“Bullshit. I should be able to curse about anything I want to.”

“Bekah.” It was her mom voice – an instinct.

“Indiana.” The younger girl mimicked the tone as best she could.

There was a beat of silence then – well, as silent as a hospital room ever could get, that is. The monotonous song of machinery beeps, the muffled car horns outside on the streets, and nurses footsteps outside never truly faded.

“If the nurses hear you cursing in here they’re gonna say I’m a bad influence.” It was almost time for rounds and meds, 7pm on the dot - they’d be there any minute.

“Speak of the devil,” Bekah grumbled, eyes flitting to the door that was swinging open, the nurse bumping against it, her cart hitting the walls right on schedule.

“Hi miss Bekah, how’re we feeling this evening?”

“Shi-“

Indiana threw her a look, the kind she imagined her mom would give if she were there. Bekah sunk back into the pillow, rolling her eyes.

“-very. Shivery. It’s cold in here.”

She earned a thumbs up for that one and a wink that made her smile.

The nurse – Jennifer, Indiana realized – was as sweet as ever. She was one of the nicer ones, always let things slide, always let her stay 30 minutes after visiting hours if she really wanted to.

“That’s probably just the meds from earlier darling, they always make you a bit chilly.”

“Can’t wait to take more.” Bekah sighed, wiggling up in the bed and moving her shirt down, her collarbone prominent under her dark skin. Next to it sat a small bulge, surrounded by medical tape, two small tubes peeking out from underneath. They’d done a good job at making it subtle, unnoticeable if you weren’t looking for it – Indiana’s mom’s port had never looked like that. She wondered if it was because the technology had improved in four years, or if they were just more careful about it when the patient was young.

Because it’s okay for an adult to have cancer, but a kid? That’s where we draw the fuckin’ line.

“Is it food?”

“What?” Jennifer asked, quirking an eyebrow as she continued to hang the bags on the IV pole.

“None of your business. Indiana, is it a food?”

“Now now,” Jennifer tutted.

“No, it’s not a food.” Indiana sighed, knowing better than to try and keep Bekah’s attitude in check. That was a battle she’d lose before it began. “Keep trying.”

She paused while the nurse took her time in getting her meds set and ready, attaching them to her port. She didn’t even flinch at the needle, the brown skin of her forehead as smooth and perfect as ever, not a worry line in sight. The game picked up as soon as Jennifer walked back out of the room.

“Is it something you- something you wear?” That was always the first sign that the meds entered her system – the ‘brain fog’ as she called it. Bekah sucked in a deep breath, her seemingly tiny chest rising up as she tried to settle herself. 

Indiana’s eyes flickered over to the IV bag – the clear liquid looked harmless enough as it dripped down. She knew it was anything but – just Bekah’s hair was enough to attest to that. She wore it in a wrap mostly these days, but she’d seen what was underneath. Her beautiful curls had started to fall out only a few weeks prior, and it was only a matter of time before they were gone completely. If she had to guess from what she’d seen when she fixed the knot of her wrap, the last of it would be gone after today.

“Yes, it’s something you wear.”

“So it’s clothes.”

“Not necessarily. You wear other things,” she explained, scooting her chair a bit closer to the bedside, reaching a hand out.

In the three years that Indiana had known Bekah, she was always amazed at how strong she was. It had impressed her from the first time she’d mustered up the courage to sign up for the volunteer program at the hospital two blocks away from her college apartment. Bekah was twelve then, a spunky young girl with big headphones over her ears and thick rubber bracelets on her thin wrists.

“Stop looking at me like that,” was what she’d chosen as an introduction. She’d looked up at Indiana with accusatory eyes, wide and dark and annoyed in the middle of the overly colorful pediatric wing hallway.

“Like what?”

“Like I have cancer. Don’t treat me like I’m sick and I won’t act like it. Capeesh?”

She’d only been able to swallow and nod, somewhat embarrassed but mostly just in awe.

So, when Indiana got matched with her as her ‘buddy’, she tried her hardest to do as she’d agreed to. Or at least, she did her best to be subtle about it. She could sneak in her moments of worry at times like this, when Bekah’s eyes were scrunched closed and she didn’t bat away the hand holding hers.

“Damn. The BBJ is not making me feel very BB esque today,” she grumbled, breathing deep in through her nose. Indiana’s other hand inched towards the bedpan resting on the table – the nausea usually kicked in right about now, and her deep breathing was always a tell that her stomach was churning. BBJ stood for ‘Bad Bitch Juice’ which was just the fun term for chemo that Bekah had come up with during one of her rotations a few years back. The nurses hated it, gave Indiana dirty looks when she let her say it around them.

“Bed pan at the ready,” Indiana reassured her, making sure it was in reach in case it got to be too much.

“Just keep playing the game, it’ll distract me. What do I know so far?”

“It’s not alive, it’s not a vegetable or a food, you can wear it but it’s not clothes.”

“Makeup?”

Indiana shook her head, doing everything to avoid reacting to the way Bekah was squeezing her hand. It was so tight that she felt her bones were probably touching each other in a way they weren’t meant to.

“Shoes?”

“No.”

“Do you wear it on your head?”

“I mean… technically?”

“That’s a cop out answer.”

“Don’t dwell on it, just keep going.”

She saw it coming before it happened – the turn of Bekah’s face, the way her body jolted just barely. It’s a good thing it wasn’t her first time, or she wouldn’t have gotten the bedpan under her fast enough to catch her vomit. She held her breath, tried not to listen to the sounds of retching so she didn’t get sick herself, holding steady until Bekah’s stomach was empty and she’s laid back against the pillows, exhausted. Indiana followed the motions, got up and walked to the bathroom, dumped the contents down the toilet and flushed it, left the plastic basin on the floor for the nurses to get later and washed her hands. By the time she made it back to the side of the bed, Bekah’s eyes were closed.

There were three marked stages of a chemo session with Bekah: the ‘this doesn’t affect me’ phase, the puke phase, and finally, the sleep phase, which seemed to be fast approaching. Even with her eyes closed she felt Indiana join her at her bedside, and she sighed in defeat.

“What was it? I don’t wanna ask more questions.”

“Earrings.”

“That’s two things, you cheated.”

She could have argued, but you just don’t argue with a kid with cancer if you don’t have to. It’s an unspoken rule.

“You’re right. You win.”

Bekah seemed content enough with that, but her eyebrows scrunched up again like they always did when she was focusing.

“Where do you get earrings in your teeth?”

“Huh?”

“Earrings in teeth… there was a guy… yesterday… earrings.”

Indiana just held her hand as she rambled, drifting off as she turned her head into her pillow. Not that she knew personally, but she’d never seen anyone be comfortable during a chemo treatment. But there was a peace that took over when their body decided that it was too much to handle in the realm of consciousness and they drifted off into their dreams.

So she was happy to look at the bed after she picked up her backpack and see that Bekah’s was asleep. She closed the door on her way out, moved to the nurse’s desk to sign out like she always did. The nurses always smiled at her, sitting back there in their colorful scrubs and big headbands. This time, it was Valentina who beamed up at her.

“Indiana, honey, how’s school going?”

“It’s going.” It’s killing me. “Just one semester left to go!”

“Don’t you overwork yourself now, we need you around here,” she threw a wink with her long lashes, opening her mouth to say something else before her phone rang. “You have a good one honey, we’ll see you next week.” Valentina picked it up, another call to another room for another sick kid.

 With as many times as Indiana had made the walk, she was pretty sure she could do it with her eyes closed. Straight, past the forest murals, press the button on the left to open the doors. Then it was the ocean hallway on the left- the blues were peaceful, little sea turtles and fish floating on the walls. At the end, by the jellyfish, was the last door of the pediatric wing. Somehow, it always felt colder past that point, inside the ‘real hospital’. The nurse’s scrubs were plain blue there, the walls taupe and bland with paintings of trees and lakes instead of Winnie the Pooh and Dory. Indiana’s shoes squeaked against the polished floor on her way to the elevator, picking up her pace. She didn’t like this part. It was too familiar, too many memories of walking down the same hallway for much different reasons. Past that it was down two floors, out and to the right to get to the front doors.

As soon as she walked out into the New York city street, it was a breath of fresh air; if you could ever consider city air fresh. Still, she always preferred the smell of exhaust and cigarettes over the bleach that stung her nose inside the hospital. And if she sniffed hard enough and the wind was right, she swore she could smell Jet’s Coffee all the way from the small store that resided three blocks down the road. 

Want anything from Jet’s? She texted Charlie, hoping for a quick response from her sister as she hurried down the sidewalk, pulling her shirt sleeves down over her hands in a bid to ward off the brisk late September air.

Nah, Devin’s making dinner. Should be done by the time you get here. 

Also, where tf is your strainer?

Bottom cabinet by the oven, she answered, shaking her head.

It wasn’t that she didn’t love her sister. She did, with her whole heart. The same went for her sweet almost-brother-in-law Devin- they were both supportive pillars in her life, always there with a listening ear, a warm hug, or life advice.

But god damn did she miss having her apartment to herself sometimes. The peace that came over her when she walked into her cozy apartment, saw the rest of Chelsea through the high windows, her view over the river? Unmatched. It was still there - the fog over the river in the cool autumn mornings, the bustling streets of people wrapped up in their coats - but now, her sister was there too, catching her at the door with the latest story of the day before she could even let out a breath. Charlie could never understand how her younger sister wanted to live alone in college, wanted a place to herself ever since she even knew it was an option. Indiana was the opposite of her in a lot of ways- the older of the two was a social butterfly of sorts who always surrounded herself with people, with loud voices and louder personalities that could keep up with her. She was wild - dropped out of college after her first semester, spent her last dime on a camera so she could grow a photography business from the ground up.

Their mom always said that Indiana was the calm to Charlie’s storm, her little angel who hardly ever cried, who just fit into the family like a perfect final puzzle piece, completing the picture. The puzzle was long forgotten now, disassembled in a box in the attic somewhere collecting dust over the last five years. She didn’t have to wonder if it would make her mom sad - she knew that it would be devastating for her if she were still there to see what had become of the Cross clan.

“There she is, the myth, the legend, thee Indiana Jamie Cross!” 

Caught up in her mind, Indiana didn’t even realize that her autopilot route home had taken her all the way into the door of Jet’s, and she found herself in the familiar lobby when she came to. The walls were charcoal gray, with the delicate little single-line white flowers painted on them that she remembered them putting up a few years ago, back when she worked there. Her old manager, Patrick, beamed at her from behind the counter, wide smile framed out by his ever growing hair.

“What’s she gonna get today, wait don’t tell me, don’t tell me. Today is a… caramel macchiato with one less pump of vanilla? Hot?” He mused, raising his eyebrows in question.

“Oatmilk, then yes, you got it.”

“Of course I was gonna give you oatmilk, what do I look like, an amateur?” He scoffed, shaking his head as she went to reach for her wallet. “It’s on the house today.”

“You can’t give me my coffee on the house every time Patrick, it’s bad for business.” 

“It’s my business, so shush and go wait at the end of the bar like a good customer,” he rolled his eyes, sending the scribbled cup down the line. She rolled her eyes and dropped a few one’s in the tip jar before she went over to her favorite chair, the big blue one by the windows where she could people watch while she waited. She always wondered what people did in small towns while they waited for things, without the bustling streets outside full of people in their own little worlds. 

Her phone buzzed in her lap. Marty. 

Hey girlie, are you busy tomorrow? We’ve got a new orientee who needs the run down, and nobody does it better than you! 

Marty’s speciality was buttering people up. Which explained why Buddies had over 200 volunteers like Indiana - with Marty in charge, it was hard to say no, even if she had planned on spending a chilled out day tomorrow with her sister and Devin.

Fine by me, just let me know what time

Awesome. He didn’t give me a specific time so I’ll just give him your number if you’re good with that.

She sent back a thumbs up as her name was called at the counter, got her coffee and headed out the door.  It was another block to get to her apartment, and when she got there the elevator ride up to the 18th floor was almost as long as the walk. She didn’t mind though. It was her own little welcome home ritual that she’d grown fond of over the last few years of living there. 

As she predicted earlier, when she opened the door, her usually peaceful space was in a bit of chaos. There were four bowls out on the counter, measuring cups everywhere, two pans out in addition to whatever smelled so good in the oven.

“Don’t start Indy, I’m gonna clean it, I promise.” Charlie appeared around the corner, already on the defense of the look she knew she was going to get. It felt a lot like Indiana was the older sister despite the three years that Charlie had on her. 

“I didn’t say anything,” Indiana mumbled under her breath, clearing a small spot on the counter and hopping up.

“It’s all in your face,” Devin teased from in front of the oven. “Scootch, unless you want me to burn you with this casserole dish.” 

She grumbled and hopped down from her much too temporary spot so that he could open the oven, deciding it was probably best to leave the kitchen until everything was done. 

Her kitchen was the only ‘small’ part of her apartment. The rest was plenty big, and she was proud of all she had done over the years to make it her own. The living room was cozy, with a dark gray couch and a reasonable (Charlie would say excessive) amount of decorative pillows and blankets. The shelves on the wall had a few house plants - fake ones, of course, and picture frames that had moved with her each time she called a new place home. The white frame that contained an old picture of her and Charlie as babies, white-blonde hair wispy as they played on the swings in their backyard. The most recent addition was the rose gold frame, a picture of her, Devin and Charlie at their engagement last July in Zion National Park - she could practically feel the heat of the sun every time she looked at it. The last frame stood alone on the smaller shelf, a wooden frame with a small heart carved in the corner. Inside, a black and white picture of her and her mom. She was about one in it, in a little crewneck sweatshirt and tennis shoes, holding onto her mom’s hands as she walked, both of them beaming. She’d been told by so many people over the years that she had “Nicole’s smile”, and she tried her hardest to not cry nowadays if anyone ever mentioned it. 

“You know, our parents weren’t glassmakers, I can’t see through you,” Charlie grumbled from her spot on the couch, gesturing to the TV that her sister was blocking.

“You know, this is my house, you could just leave,” she countered, offering her fakest of smiles.

“You know, Dad pays the rent so it’s not technically yours.”

“Alright, dinner is ready, dinner is ready,” Devin called out, knowing that Charlie had already stepped one toe over the line, desperately trying to keep her from throwing herself fully over the edge.

Charlie popped up to her feet, unfazed by the glare that followed her all the way to the island as she went on to scoop out her pasta. 

Indiana didn’t have the energy to even think about her dad, much less talk about him. Kenneth Cross was a good father when she was little. He was attentive, taught her how to play basketball, how to ride her bike without training wheels. On a paper list, he checked off most of the dad boxes. And then his wife died, and he decided the time was nigh to abandon ship with very little regard for his 16 and 19 year old daughters. But if you asked him, he’d be sure to let you know that he took very good care of his kids, even put up his youngest in a nice New York apartment so she could go to school and not have to work a job. Taking care of things meant throwing money at them, whether it was at work or at home. His best, and only, sign of affection was the direct deposit that hit Indiana’s bank account on the 31st of every month. 

Needless to say, he was a sensitive subject.

She bit back the words she really wanted to spit out and made her way into the kitchen, grabbing her bowl a bit more aggressively than she needed to. As soon as she found her spot back on the counter she stabbed into the soft noodles and shoved them in her mouth, proceeding to burn the shit out of her tongue. 

Lovely.

Devin made small talk as best he could around the awkward tension - he was an only child, and anytime the two sisters fought he tried to fill in the void with anything he could. It always baffled him how the two of them could be pissed one moment, and then back to normal a few seconds later.

“Wanna go shopping tomorrow? And don’t say you have school shit, it’s a Sunday.” Charlie asked.

“A, I always have school shit, and B, I can’t anyways, I’ve got an orientation to do for Buddies.” 

“There’s no way you actually have that much school work to do, I think you’re just trying to avoid us,” she countered. 

“CJ she’s gonna be a doctor, that shit ain’t easy,” Devin piped up, eager to boost his almost sister-in-law up. Indy tried to ignore the little pang of jealousy she always felt when he called her sister that. Charlie Jo. CJ. She’d had her own fair share of nicknames over the years, shortened little versions of her name that everyone liked to use. But Devin was the only one who was allowed to call Charlie CJ, and there was something about the intimacy of it that had Indiana wishing someone was there to give her a cute nickname, just for them.

She held out until Charlie started in on the dishes that she promised to do and then she was headed to her room, social battery depleted. Despite her sister’s doubts, she did always have some form of school work that she could be working on, slowly chipping away at the constant stream of assignments and notes.  She liked to break it down into sections, tackling a certain class each night of the week. Saturdays were her ‘easy’ nights, reserved for reviewing her medical terminology notes and quizzing herself on new terms.

As nerdy as it seemed to anyone else, she actually found it fun. 10 year old her would have thought it was the coolest thing that she actually knew what choleodechojunostomy meant, though she was pretty sure she was never going to actually need to know. 

She was halfway through the abbreviations portion, stuck on the ‘G’ of esophagogastroduodenoscopy when her phone buzzed against her leg. She expected to see a text from Charlie asking her to join in on whatever movie they were watching in the living room, but instead she was met with a new number and an unfamiliar area code - 818. 

Probably spam. She left it alone, moving back to her cards, flipping between as she mumbled them quietly to herself.

“PRN. Pro re nata.”

Buzz

“EEG. Electroencephalography. TIA”

Buzz

“TIA. Transient-”

Buzz

“Jesus,” she huffed, grabbing her phone and swiping it open to her texts, all from that same 818 number.

Hey, Marty gave me your number, I’m your new orientee :)

My name is Grayson btw, probably should have started with that 

She told me to figure out a time with you but I’m p flexible so just let me know

And idk how to get to the pediatric part of the hosp so if you could meet me somewhere else and show me how to get there that would be awesome

Why he couldn’t have sent it all in one text she had no idea, but at least he was nice. She typed back quickly.

Hey! I’m Indiana. We can meet by the front doors if that’s easier, how about 9:30?

She didn’t even have time to pick up her next flashcard before the typing bubble popped back up.

Early riser, I like it. 9:30 is chill, I’ll see you then. Have a good night :)

You too :), she answered, quickly saving his contact as ‘Grayson’ before putting her phone back down on her comforter and diving back into her flashcards. She had 200 more to get through by the end of the night, and all she really wanted to do was get under her covers and go to sleep. By the time she reached the end of the stack, the definitions were just as hard to understand as their latin based counterparts. As soon as she flipped over arthralgia to reveal joint pain, she was moving the pile to her desk, pulling on a t-shirt and curling up in bed.

..............................................................................................................................

Indiana had never been a breakfast eater. She was always too eager to get to school, occasionally running out the door with a granola bar in hand at most at her mom’s request. The trend continued as she got older, though now she used her morning coffee as sustenance for the first few hours of the day. Which was why she found herself walking right back through the glass doors of Jet’s again, a mere 12 hours after her last visit. It smelled like fresh beans and vanilla soy as soon as she made in over the threshold - a comforting smell, familiar and warm. Patrick beamed at her from behind the espresso bar. She couldn’t remember the last time he’d taken a day off.

“I’m paying today, no arguing,” she called out, giving him a serious look until he mouthed ‘fine’ at her over the bar. Satisfied, she pulled out her phone, surprised to see a text. Grayson.

I’m by the front doors on the left. I know im early so no rush :)

She checked the time at the top of her phone. 9:10.

I’m getting coffee and then I’ll be there

Her thumbs hovered over the keyboard, contemplating. Was it weird to buy coffee for someone you’d never met? She sent another text anyway.

Want anything?

The bubbles popped back up as she stepped up in line.

Biggest cup of the strongest stuff they’ve got please. I’ll shoot you a Venmo for it

She liked his response and slid her phone back in her pocket before she stepped up to the counter. The barista was a new face, someone that had been hired after she had left.

“What can I get started for you?”

“Can I do a 16 ounce vanilla oat milk latte and a 20 ounce dark roast please?”

“Absolutely, that’ll be-”

“Give her the drip for free,” Patrick interjected. “We don’t charge past employees for drip coffee.”

The barista looked a bit flustered but took the dark roast off anyways, quickly spouting off the total and taking the cash that Indiana handed her. She turned around and poured the dark roast, passing it over with a smile. An older man was sitting in the blue chair when Indiana made her way to the other end of the store, so she settled by the bar instead, watching Patrick pump syrup and steam milk in a bit of a sequenced dance. She missed being behind the bar sometimes, but not enough to justify going back and getting talked down to by shitty customers. 

He finished her latte in record time, only having a spare moment to blow her a kiss before he was right back to the next drink. She didn’t mind - the thought of Grayson waiting on her made her nervous. She tried to remind herself that she wasn’t running late. It wasn’t her fault that he liked to show up twenty minutes early to things and she only liked to show up ten minutes early. Ten minutes was reasonable and showed dedication - twenty was a bit excessive. 

The cups kept her hands warm for the three blocks to the hospital, her pace a bit quicker than usual. She kept her eyes peeled for someone who looked like a Grayson once she made it. A tall, lanky man passed by her, headed towards the doors, but he didn’t seem like he was looking for anyone. She remembered the text. Front doors, to the left.

Sure enough, there was someone sitting alone.

He took up about half of the bench, his shoulders broad under a charcoal gray sweater that went well with the olive green of his pants. He looked well put together - a bit intimidating, but nice enough to send someone a have a good night text. He looked like he could be a Grayson. He must have felt her watching him, because he lifted his eyes from his phone and looked directly at her, taking in the two coffee cups in her hands with a smile.

“Indiana?”

His voice was deep, a bit commanding. It made her hesitate for some reason, panic just barely. “Uh yeah, that’s me.” Stupid.

“Nice to meet you. I’m Grayson.”

#mixtape #I CAN'T BELIEVE IM ACTUALLY POSTING THIS WOW #please let me know what you think pls pls pls im so NERVOUS #grayson dolan #grayson dolan imagine #grayson dolan fanfiction #dolan twins #dolan twins fanfiction #lynds writes

[spiderman-homecomeme]

as long as i’m living (my baby you’ll be)

some good dad!Peter and good mom!MJ content for @iovewords​ on her birthday! I hope you enjoy the soft sleepiness! Happy birthday, bb! <3

--

He crawls through the window when the sky’s still an inky black, his body aching, bruised and battered from a long night of patrol. 

The room is dark, save for the lone patch of soft moonlight on the wall; he pulls his mask off, releasing a weighted, relieved sigh seeing his wife sleeping soundly, nestled into the mattress, having gathered every last inch of the blanket, her hand relaxed on his empty side. Warmth blooms in his chest; it’s nice, seeing her resting so peacefully after a long seven months. It’s enough to make him forget about the stinging pain in his side, and he feels the longing pull to climb into the bed with her and hold her in his arms.

His muscles groan in protest as he steps out of the torn, slightly bloodied suit, and he curses under his breath as he picks it up, inspecting the little rips and tears along the black and red. It’s nothing that he can’t fix, just the idea that it’s something he has to fix. 

But in all honesty, mechanically sewing up his suit is the last thing on his mind. 

He winces, inhaling sharply as he redresses into fresh clothes, a soft t-shirt, a cozy pair of sweatpants that he’s fairly certain is actually MJ’s. A shower would help, he knows, but he’s not sure if he has any more energy to stand for much longer, too enamored with the idea of sleeping. 

The mattress dips under his weight as he releases a full-body sigh, and he hears Michelle mumble something incoherent, reaching out, still more than half-asleep as she naturally gravitates to him, wrapping her arms around his chest and holding him close. 

Peter’s lips press gently to her forehead, his eyes drifting closed as he breathes in the comforting floral notes of her shampoo. 

He’s drifting on the edge of sleep and consciousness, his breath slowing, deepening as he falls closer and closer to the comforting pull of slumber, when he hears it. It’s quiet at first, so soft a sound that only he can pick up, the unmistakable beginnings of their baby girl’s cry over the crackling of the monitor.

It starts as a faint whimper, sleepy and sad. He stills, listening, waiting instead of moving on his first impulse—as he had her first night at home. The books he and MJ had pored over all said the same thing, and he knows from experience, to give her time to let the storm pass. To give her a chance to cry it out. 

But the minutes pass, and her crying grows into hiccuping wails and sobs, the sound tugging at his heart as he wonders if she’s had a bad dream, if she doesn’t feel well. He feels MJ stir beside him, but he places a hand on hers, silently telling her to stay put, that he’s got this. 

With another tender kiss on her forehead, he sits up, his bones and muscles aching with each movement as he crawls out of bed and walks across the hall. 

“Hey, Bug,” He says softly as he pushes the door open, his little girl’s cries filling the room and pulling at his chest. She looks up at him as he moves to her crib, her eyes teary, her bottom lip jutted out, arms already reaching for his comfort. 

Though, she cries louder as he picks her up, pushing her head into his shoulder, her tiny fist gripping his shirt, her legs kicking out in her sleep sack. 

“I know—I know I’m not Mama,” He breathes out a faint laugh, rubbing soothing circles into her back as he gently bounces on his feet. He plants a soft kiss into her short curls. “I know…” He shushes her, his voice just barely above a whisper as he moves to sit in the plush reclining rocker, grimacing as his knees scream in protest. “You wanted Mom and you got Dad.” 

He hums softly to her, a nameless song, letting her cry into the crook of his neck as he rocks her back and forth. Soon, her cries fade into muffled whimpers and hiccups, and she inhales sharply as she tries to gather her breath. 

“How about a lullaby?” Peter asks gently as she lets out another cry. “Hush little baby, don’t say a word…” His voice starts, murmured so that only she can hear, and she stills, listening for a moment. “Daddy’s gonna buy you a mockingbird…”

She wiggles in his arms, sniffling in protest. 

“Yeah, I don’t get that one either…” Peter smiles sleepily. “You’re mom would say birds are a government conspiracy, but she’s just joking.” He pauses a moment, letting his head rest on top of his little girl’s. “Itsy Bitsy Spider? Or is that too on the nose?” 

He likes to think that her next cry is in agreement with him. 

Chuckling at his own joke, he closes his eyes, letting out a heavy sigh as she continues to whimper into his shoulder. “What to sing for my little Bug…” He hums, his rocking steady as he soothes his daughter. Her cries pick up again when he falls silent, the same tired grin on his face as he rubs her back. “Shhhh… You’re okay. I know.” 

He breathes out, holding her closer to him, her warm weight on his chest bringing a comfort that wraps his heart in a soft blanket. It’s moments like this, with her, with MJ, where he’s beaten and worn, physically and emotionally exhausted from the crime-ridden world outside, that he’s able to find peace. Moments where the pain is forgotten, even if only for a little bit. 

He cherishes each second that passes, the sinking feeling underneath the warmth reminding him of his other life, of what could happen. There may come a time where he he can’t do this, and he knows this; it’s why he jumps at every opportunity. And he knows the possibility is very real; that one night, he might not come back, he might not be here to hold his daughter. 

That every moment with her could very well be one of the last.

And he knows that while their little girl doesn’t understand yet, he can see it in Michelle’s expression as she watches him put the suit on, as she watches him leap out the window. He sees the relief in her smile as he greets her in the morning, as she wraps her arms around him and clings so desperately. 

There’s a lump in his throat, a burning behind his eyes as she presses his lips to his baby’s head again, lingering as he anchors himself in the moment. She’s still restless in his arms, still crying, the neck of his shirt gathered in her tiny little fist. 

He starts to hum again, low and soft, and her cries fade to tired whimpers. His voice comes out, just so the two of them can hear, and no one else. “Hush now, my baby… Shhhh… Be still, love, don’t cry...” And he keeps rocking her; back and forth, back and forth. “Sleep as you’re rocked by the stream…” 

There’s a scratch to his voice as his throat tightens, but his heart warms as his daughter finally calms, her breathing slow as she closes her eyes. 

“Sleep and remember my lullaby...” The words only come out in low murmurs now, and he yawns, feeling himself drifting along with the little one on his chest. “So I’ll be with you when you dream... ”

He smiles at the soft, tiny snores that come from the bundle in his arms. He keeps humming and rocking, holding her close as he starts to feel the pull of sleep. And instead of moving his little girl back to her crib, he stays in the chair, allowing himself these moments. 

Because it’s then that he’s filled with a certain comfort; he knows that no matter what happens that the love he shares with his two girls will always be there. Nothing can ever change that. 

His smile never leaves as gently rocks the baby in his arms, his shirt still held in her little hand. 

Just as he’s started to float off into a peaceful slumber, he feels a warm presence standing in the doorway. “Hey,” MJ’s voice is soft, like a sleepy hug. 

He looks to her, careful not to rouse their baby. “Hey,” he grins. 

“Wanna trade?” She asks, running a hand over her tired face. “So you can get some sleep?” The look in her eyes, the slight uptick of her lips, feels like a warm blanket, one that Peter wishes he could be wrapped in forever. 

“No,” he breathes, resting his head against their daughter’s once more. “I’m okay.” And then, he looks to his wife again, the corners of his lips tugged into an easy smile. He holds an arm out, beckoning her to him. 

There’s more than enough room on plush rocker, and she knows this. Still, that doesn’t keep her free from the good-natured eye roll as she tiptoes over, gently lowering herself on the edge of his lap and the patch of empty space. Her legs drape over his as she leans into him, his arm coiling around her. 

“Peter, we can’t sleep here,” she mumbles, her eyes closing. 

He huffs out a soft laugh. “I know,” he replies, though he doesn’t move. “Just…” He sighs contentedly. “Just for a few more minutes,” he says, somehow holding the two of them even closer. “Just wanna hold you… For a little bit…”

He can feel Michelle’s smile, the soft press of her lips against his cheek. 

And as he sits there, his two loves cuddled against him, he forgets the aches and pains, his worries soothed. It’s only this moment, the beating of their close hearts. 

“Don’t drop us,” MJ teases, her voice a gentle murmur in his ear. 

Peter laughs lightly, shaking his head. “Don’t worry, I’ve got you.” And then, his voice fades, hushed and soft, filled with a sincerity that warms his chest, blooming. A promise that will never break, even when he’s gone. 

“Always will.” 

#spideychelle #petermj #michelle jones #peter parker #petermjane #baby fic hell yeah! #happy birthday!!!

[kinetic-elaboration]

September 17: 3x07 Day of the Dove

I am incredibly discombobulated today—usual weekend nocturnal shenanigans I guess! Anyway it’s somehow midnight. Gonna try to write up these note on the Classic episode The Day of the Dove in as efficient a manner as possible.

Hmm, a planet with wavy pink Fraggle plants. I like it already.

But where is Spock? Very suspicious.

I really appreciate Kirk giving a little speech to set up the overall question/issue for us. (I know he does this all the time with the Captain’s logs but this is out loud and so… more obviously expository.)

Oh no, it’s our old friends…the Klingons.

I will admit that this ONE TIME, the Klingon is being reasonable. Like, it is reasonable to think that Kirk and the Enterprise attacked his ship, given that his hip WAS attacked, and who else would it be?

Three years of peace between the Klingons and the Federation? That is inclusive of the show so all this tension must technically be “peace” and also implies there was something more like a direct war going on, like, right before Kirk got the captaincy.

Zoolander voice: What is this, a colony of the INVISIBLE?

“We have no devil. But we understand the habits of yours.”

No takers? No takers on the torture? No volunteers to be mercilessly tortured by the Klingons?

Star Trek Beyond could have had Kirk and Chekov bond over being brothers! I mean, to other people.

They’ll kill 100 hostages at the first sign of treachery. He does know there are only 400-some people on the ship right? Maybe you should pace yourself, Kang.

Kirk’s so badass he needs MULTIPLE guns trained on him just to use the phone.

Oh-ho secret message to Spock. Which version of the iPhone will be capable of doing THAT?

The Klingons are “suspended in transit” is an awfully nice way of saying they’re just dematerialized atoms in space. Philosophy major and/or Bones nightmare fuel.

How did Kang not see this coming, by the way? Like, he just says “I’m taking your ship now, me and my 6 men versus your 400-some men, and I’ll do this by simply declaring it to be so. Now let’s beam up to your ship, where I’ll be greatly outnumbered, and there are armed security guards all around me.” Guess he’s been reading The Secret!

WIFE AND SCIENCE OFFICER

Aka the most important part of this whole episode.

Kirk’s face is very ?????? You can have both????

It’s legitimately not even important for her to be the science officer tbqh. Like that is so gratuitous. That’s just in there to drive me insane.

"We're prisoners, somehow, after I demanded to come on the ship, assuming they'd just give it to me without any kind of fight. How DID this happen?”

Federation death camps lol—someone’s been watching Fox News.

I do kind of wonder… is this an actual rumor that goes around the Klingon homeworld or is it something that the alien entity put in her head specifically to make her angrier right now? I mean it really could be either.

I also appreciate this episode for being pretty much the only one to actually attempt to give the Klingons a reason for being as they are. The Romulans… maybe aren’t well-described, but they do have a sort of regalness to them, appropriate for being related to Vulcans, and you can kind of imagine that they are the way they are because they’re Vulcans without the intense self-control. Plus they’re literally only in 2 TOS eps and in the second, the Federation are the aggressors. But the Klingons show up a half-dozen times only to be depicted each time as just like Cartoonishly Bad, aggressive, violent, and selfish for basically no reason. And I mean, some people really are!! But TOS has so much nuance in other places, that it always seemed a little disappointing to me that the Klingons are really just like ‘well we’re just bad and we hate everyone and we really like killing I guess.” At least in this ep there’s a little more added to that: that there is poverty on their world, that they feel aggrieved, that they feel unprotected, that taking and conquering is how they look after themselves…

I think that’s later in the episode though.

He’s detaining them in the LOUNGE lol. With their favorite dishes available to them to eat. Absolutely barbarous conditions.

I can’t believe Chekov is hanging in the elevator with the cool kids. Like, one of these things really isn’t like the others.

Kang is officially sure of himself for someone currently imprisoned in the lounge, that most fearsome of Federation death camps.

Hmm, could the glittery light alien have taken over??

You know what, that's a lot of tasks for Johnson to do all by himself: search the whole ship, fix the engines, and free 400 people.

Sulu would love this: everyone gets a sword!!

“Bridge. I gotta show this to Sulu immediately.”

Klingons have maintained a dueling tradition. That’s interesting. Finally some characterization going on.

Spock is really living up to his logical nature today. Everyone else has gone off the emotional deep end and he’s like “have you considered this completely rational explanation that accounts for the actual, observed facts??”

Whoops Chekov is actually an only child. Scratch that previous Beyond headcanon. (Interesting that his dead brother does really resemble Sam though—killed on a research colony??)

Love that Sulu knows that about him though.

Oh, that’s a pretty schematic picture of the Enterprise. I want that on a t-shirt.

Lol the pan out to the armory, now filled with… swords!!

Do ALL of these men have a fetish for swords? Sulu and fencing, Spock displaying swords in his quarters, and Kirk in his San Francisco apartment, and Scotty salivating over this Scottish blade.

“Klingon units.”

Finally Sulu gets his sword! It’s what he deserves.

Love that the shiny light alien also has a fetish for swords.

Oh no, it’s our old adversary, an alien life force.

What is the alien’s purpose? Um, I’m pretty sure its purpose is to start shit.

“An appropriate choice of terms, Captain.” I don’t even remember what this is referring to but I think it’s pretty clear that Spock is enjoying himself during a crisis again.

Bones, being so dramatic. Were there atrocities? He’s talking about the Klingons as if they were literally hacking off limbs—it’s a few stab wounds here and there, chill.

Oooh, time to behave like military men—strong words. (But I thought it wasn’t the military?? @ S**** P****) (This might not even be my best argument, given the context of this episode, but I’m sticking with it.)

This is like a giant game of capture the flag.

AU that’s just about the Enterprise crew playing capture the flag with the Klingons.

Sulu in the background standing guard with his sword

Damn, turning on Spock with the slurs now!!

Spock was absolutely ready to kill him. Like he would 100% have taken him out with a blow to the head. And he’d been doing such a good job of not feeling the alien’s effects so far! Admittedly, that was a strong provocation though.

Honestly, I really like this scene. It’s uncomfortable and tense and you can really see how the alien is bringing out the worst possible influences of their respective races. And I liked how Spock was definitely full on pre-Reform Vulcan for a minute there. It was a more effective portrayal of what that might have looked like than All Our Yesterdays tbqh.

A result of… stress?

Kirk got himself out of it first. He’s so strong. He knows himself so well, he cannot be outsmarted by any alien.

“We’ve been taught to think in terms other than war.”

“The alien brings out the worst of us—patriotic drumbeating…even race hatred.”

He’s so sad; he can’t imagine thinking like that about Spock :(

Sulu in a Jeffries tube! A man of many talents. It’s okay bb, take credit for turning on the lights.

The alien must have been getting bored. The Klingons must have been doing too well, and the playing field needs to be leveled for maximum shit-stirring.

“Let’s find that alien.” That’s how I ALWAYS feel.

Oh, Kang, you’re so close—“What power supports our battle but thwarts our victory.” So, so close to getting it.

ALIEN DETECTED.

Spock takes his sword, of course.

“Jim.” Obligatory Jim moments hit differently when they’re not so obligatory.

“Jim—stop hitting my protégé. And put that sword down.”

Kirk looks so sad, picking Chekov up to carry him bridal style.

Also in addition to ‘race hatred’ I think we need to add ‘rape-y tendances’ to the bad stuff that the alien is inspiring here.

“A brief surge of racial bigotry. Most distasteful.” Spock winning for understatement of the year.

They're assuming the alien is trying to test out their relative powers but I think it just wants entertainment. I mean, doesn’t it look like a naughty little thing?

Mara’s outfit is… little shorts? Interesting. Usually not my style but she makes it work.

Spock doesn’t even look at Johnson as he falls lol. Another one bites the dust.

“It exists on the hate of others.”

What does this remind me of? Oh, the Vast of Night and the whole “aliens made us do every bad thing ever” conspiracy theory. At least this one makes more sense, in part because it is not quite so overwhelmingly broad!

All hostile attitudes must be eliminated, he says, and there's Mara right behind Kirk giving him a death stare lol.

Kang is so obviously posing. Google Earth, always taking pictures.

Only a few minutes before drifting forever in space becomes inevitable? Good thing Kirk works well under pressure.

“Well… do whatever you can, Scotty. You know the drill.” Doesn’t even bother giving real directions anymore. We’ve been in this scenario before.

“So we drift in space, with only hatred and bloodshed aboard.”

And the 392 people below just get to…live in Enterprise prison, I guess.

Star date: Armageddon. So dramatic!

I’m not even making that up; that’s an actual quote. Can you imagine being an Admiral listening to this?

“Stop the war now.” An actual line, really aired on television.

Spock wants to threaten the wife lol. That's the old pre-Reform Vulcan seeping through. Surak who?

Damn, Kang is cold. “Eh, she gets the concept of being killed in battle.” They’re gonna need marriage counseling after this.

“There is another way. Mutual trust and help.” Yes that’s my hero!!

“No one can guarantee the actions of another.” Can’t remember the context of this entirely anymore, but great line.

The entity is loving this—multi-person choreographed sword fight!!

"Those who hate and fight must stop themselves. otherwise it is not stopped.” Another baller line. Spock has a lot of deep thoughts today. And so does Kirk. And Kang.

Kirk tries to reason with the alien. Nice try.

“Shoo. Shoo, alien. Off the ship, go away.”

Omg that last moment—Kang slapping Kirk’s back way too hard, Spock’s completely ridiculous wide-eyed expression when he does, like some sort of combo of amusement and confusion, and then Sulu just passing on by in the background….

Then the alien just yeets itself into space. And that’s the end!

Always feels weird when there’s no wrap up on the bridge.

Also, what are they going to do with the Klingons? They have no ship. They really did come out of this a lot worse than Kirk and co. No ship, huge casualties—and no one to blame even, but the alien.

I feel like the alien messed up a little in killing so many Klingons. Like, it could have accomplished its purpose, angering the Klingons and turning them on Kirk, by attacking the ship a little less violently—you know they’d react to 5 deaths pretty much the same as 400, and then there would be many more people to fight forever and produce that sweet sweet anger!

Maybe the alien’s powers aren’t strong enough to influence 800 people though. Also it wants equal forces and 800 people wouldn’t fit on the Enterprise, one assumes. So it still makes sense.

That was, of course, an excellent episode. 100% agree with is classic status, even though the main things I remembered going in were the wife + science officer bit, and everyone laughing at the end in a really forced, fake way, in order to make the alien go away.

I thought the Klingons were a lot better/more interesting today than usual. First, I think Kang is a better character, or a better actor maybe, than the others; he has a certain way about him that is… more watchable, more sympathetic. And he’s always saying these really dramatic things that make it seem likely he writes patriotic Klingon war poetry in his off time. Also, including his wife made them seem more… not human obviously, but normal. Not just cardboard cut-out villains. And of course the actual lightly specific motivations I earlier mentioned helped too.

Also, the plotting was very good: it built up slowly but surely over time, so at first the alien’s influence wasn’t that obvious, and then it became more so, and then it became horrifically obvious and extreme. And then you had to re-evaluate earlier moments: was that the alien changing facts in their heads, or a real part of the animosity between humans and Klingons? And it wasn’t always clear, which I appreciated. The tension when the people were at their worst wasn’t overdone, like in that moment with Scotty, Spock, and Kirk—or even in Chekov’s assault on Mara, tbh. The various strategies of the different sides were very entertaining too; there was never a dull moment, and they fit in a lot of straight-up actions and twists into 50 minutes.

The possible threat was truly terrifying, also: stuck in a space ship, forever, unable to die, feeling the worst possible emotions all the time, besieged, angered, despairing, fighting a war that can’t be won, being injured and suffering only to recover and fight again, and it never stops… A perfect nightmare mixture of insanity and violence and pain. And the alien, in encouraging hatred and anger, doesn’t discriminate between sides: they turn on each other just as much as on the Klingons, breeding paranoia and infighting. For eternity.

The episode also felt much more strongly anti-war than I remember tbh. Like it was not subtle. Kirk literally says “stop the war” in so many words. He has a part in his speech where he talks about the possibility of other aliens out there, encouraging other wars. And while I do think “maybe the aliens are making us do it” is a cop out explanation, or would be if it were real, the scenario gave the show a lot of room to say, like, pretty ballsy things: to include “patriotic drum beating” along with “race hatred” in a list of corrupting feelings they were experiencing; to show how the same instincts that lead to warring also lead to sexual assault and the aforementioned ‘race hatred;” to reveal the true horror of an endless war by making the participants unkillable and sticking them in a singular space ship in the middle of nowhere; to imply that the combatants of war gain nothing from it, but outside or third-party entities will pull strings of their own design to profit from the conflict as long as possible; even to make an impassioned plea to camera to stop the endlessness of the conflict. Like I can’t even totally unpack this but it is a lot!

Finally, it was also a great Kirk episode, which of course is my most important factor. He’s smart; he’s strong; he’s so sure of himself and his values that he cannot be manipulated to mindless hatred, he represents the values of the Federation, and the show itself; he treats even his enemies with basic respect and humanity; and ultimately, he saves the day.

Okay I was not efficient in writing this up at all! It is very late!!

#the year 2021 #2021: star trek #2021: fandom thoughts #star trek tos

[simp-for-mha-men]

𝕤𝕥𝕒𝕥𝕦𝕤: 𝕠𝕟𝕝𝕚𝕟𝕖 (𝕕𝕖𝕟𝕜𝕚 𝕜𝕒𝕞𝕚𝕟𝕒𝕣𝕚 𝕩 𝕣𝕖𝕒𝕕𝕖𝕣)

A/N: My first piece of writing! I hope that all of you enjoy it. I LOVE IT! (also a Denki stan, so ya know) I totally believe Denki is the kinda person to create friends only AND in person. Without further ado, here ya go.

Genre: fluffy fluff with mutual pining 💞

Word count: 2.3k

♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥*♥

itzElectric has joined the chat

itzElectric: HEAR YE! HEAR YE! I SUMMON MY COMPANION @IceStorm TO CURE MY BOREDOM!

Denki Kaminari was once again on his phone, searching for the person who he began talking to only months ago in a future-hero chatroom. He remembered he slid into IceStorm’s DMs with a cheesy pick-up line: Do you know how much a polar bear weighs? Enough to break the ice. A classic one-liner he hoped wouldn’t scare the person on the other side of the screen away.

IceStorm ended up responding to the DM almost immediately, commenting on how the Titanic wouldn’t appreciate that opener. Denki knew from that simple reply that he and IceStorm were going to get along just fine.

IceStorm, whose name he later found out was (y/n), was an all around perfect human being. Seriously, they were. Denki swore to the Bakusquad that if you looked up the definition of perfect in the dictionary, (y/n)’s tag would be next to it.

Their quirk related to the online name they chose for themselves. The fact that they could not only produce ice from their body but also turn any bodies of water, like clouds or lakes, into ice was fascinating to the electric boy. He, in turn, shared his quirk with (y/n). He even sent a video of himself in full “Dumb Denki” mode, to which he received an audio clip of them laughing hysterically as a reply.

The two online friends shared everything with each other. When (y/n) broke up with their first boyfriend, they talked with Denki the entire night over voice chat. When Denki started doubting himself and his placement in UA’s hero course, the future ice hero immediately gave him a million reasons on why he was going to become a great hero.

It took Chargebolt only 3 months to realize that he had developed feelings for his online friend after sending that fateful DM. He couldn’t tell (y/n) though. No way. If he did, they would probably block him, maybe even delete their account and create a new one just to get away from him for good.

How did this happen you might ask? Well, it began when (y/n) and Denki found out they were the same age. They also both wanted to become pro-heroes, obviously. Plus, all of their interests lined up with each other. It was as if fate pulled them both together through an internet connection and an obsession with Tik Tok memes.

Snapping out of his trance, Denki realized he had been zoning out for a few minutes to recount how he met his current crush. He was so head-over-heels for a person he had only ever heard and not seen that he didn’t even check if IceStorm was online.

Doing just what his brain thought of, he clicked IceStorm’s profile in his friends list and saw what he wished to see the most. Next to a green dot read the words Status: Online, making Denki’s heart rate speed up just a bit.

Instead of waiting for more time to pass, and considering it was almost 2 AM on a Friday night, he DMed the ice maker.

itzElectric: hey.....you lowkey left me hangin in the main chat 😔

He hoped, prayed, and wished that (y/n) would respond. He wanted his partner in crime. His meme expert. His muse. He wanted another audio clip of them singing songs horribly off-key or laughing at another ridiculously stupid Tik Tok. He wanted his heart to flutter in his chest just a bit more. He wanted to feel them in person. He wanted...no, needed to video chat with (y/n).

They had known each other for a total of 8 months, and graduation was coming up for the both of them. If he could video chat with (y/n), maybe he could work up the courage and ask to meet them at the café near U.A. It had the best pastries, something that he knew they would love.

itzElectric: something up? you know you can tell me anything 

Very rarely did it take you more than a couple of seconds to respond to the blonde. It worried him. What if something had happened? What if you were doubting yourself? What if you had gotten injured? What if you were--

Suddenly, his phone vibrated. He never had picked it up faster in his life. As he looked down at the message he had just sent, he felt his face heat up slightly when he read your response.

IceStorm: nah nothing’s wrong. was someone worried about me? lol 🥴

He was so happy you couldn’t see his blushing face. However, little did he know the reason you didn’t meet him in the chat room was because you were thinking about what to say. Also, you were blushing as well.

Going to Shiketsu was a big deal, and you never wanted to get distracted. When you met itzElectric online, everything changed. You began developing feelings. It was an issue, but it was a very, very good issue. You had never seen his face. All you wanted to do was video chat with him. If you could video chat with Denki, maybe you could work up the courage and ask to meet him at the café near U.A. It had the best frappes, something that you knew he would love.

You felt your heart rate pick up when Denki responded to your previous message.

itzElectric: obviously. if you died or something, who would make me feel better about myself? 👉🏻👈🏻🥺

Denki began questioning his latest reply. It sounded clingy, he thought. He might as well have just dug his own grave. Who would say something like that?

IceStorm: awwww is my bb giving me a compliment 💘

Your heart soared with emotion. This man, separated by a screen, was your world. You could never have him, though. If you did, he would get freaked out. Besides, you knew he was a flirt with how many pick-up lines he got your opinion on. 

itzElectric: well.....since your online, i wanted to ask you something kinda important

Denki knew he shouldn’t be typing anything to them. He knew that this could make or break their entire relationship. In a couple minutes, he might be blasting The One That Got Away by Katy Perry and crying. Despite this, he waited for (y/n)’s reply.

IceStorm: sure. what’s up?

itzElectric: i feel like we have a pretty strong connection....so can we maybe see each other

You might as well have gone into cardiac arrest. This man, the man you’ve had a crush for 4 months, just asked you to meet him. Or was it a video chat request? Maybe just pictures? You needed clarification before you freaked out even more.

IceStorm: what do you mean? like in person or....?

Denki froze. In person? YOU wanted to meet HIM in person? That did not catch him off guard. No, totally not. It punched, kicked, and threw him off guard. That wasn’t suppose to happen. He wanted to video chat then meet up with you. Could this happen out of order?

IceStorm: yo....pika? gonna answer me? 

The electric boy typed before his brain could tell him to stop what he was doing.

itzElectric: can you video chat right now?

He wanted exactly what you wanted. The months of banter over chat and stupid voice memos led up to this, but you couldn’t believe it. The two of you could never be together. Denki had to have a girlfriend or boyfriend. There’s no way a catch like him would still be single. Still, you typed your response out immediately.

IceStorm: yes

Your phone began vibrating profusely due to the incoming call. In the moment, you forgot to turn on any lights. Leaping out of your bed, you scrambled to turn on the lamp that was on your desk. You then turned on the one next to the bed. Then, you did the unthinkable: you answered the call.

When the phone stopped ringing, Denki saw you. Oh my All Might.....why didn’t he do this sooner? He was floored by your looks. You were even better than perfect. Your face held a soft expression that made him turn almost as red as a tomato. Your hair complemented the irises of your eyes beautifully. It was as if you weren’t even human. You were just an angel visiting him for a brief moment.

You were seeing him in the same light. His blonde hair and bright yellow eyes made a fire ignite in your heart. He held a goofy grin, one you had imagined many nights before falling asleep. However, you were very far off. His entire persona was fixated in that grin. It was absolutely phenomenal.

“Hi,” you started, letting out a breath you didn’t even realize you were holding.

“Hey,” he responded.

Denki was speechless. You were enamored. This was everything you both wanted.

“So,” you began, “should I call you Denki or itzElectric?”

“Whatever you want.”

Denki wasn’t using his brain anymore. It was as if he short-circuited himself without using his quirk. He was responding to everything you said from his heart. It was all out of love for you.

You giggled a bit, bringing the electricity user back to his senses.

“Why all of this suddenly?” you questioned.

“I wanted to see you.”

“Really?”

“No. I,” Denki paused and inhaled, “I needed to see you. To hear you. To just be with you.”

Your face became flushed as if you had been training for the past 5 hours. The guy you had fallen so hard for needed to see you? He wasn’t acting flirty or overly comedic. He was peaceful and had a glint in his eye. Could it be--?

“D-dude! You can’t just s-say things like that,” you stammered in the best voice possible.

Denki was whipped for you. He glanced at the clock and realized it was 2:18. He needed to be up at 7 for a morning run with Kirishima. He’s run on no sleep before from talking to you all night, but tomorrow was going to be a strenuous training day. He had to get everything off of his chest.

“Listen,” Denki said, “(y/n), I really--”

“N-no. Just w-wait a minute,” you cut in.

Two very different emotions coursed through you both. You felt a sense of purpose, bordering on the edge of extreme shyness. Denki felt nervous, bile already threatening his throat.

“I like you,” you stated.

His eyes grew the size of dinner plates. You did not just say that. He just had too much caffeine before bed. Wait, he didn’t have anything with caffeine before bed. 

“L-like as m-more than a friend. You’re really cool, and I want to see you,” you ended.

When you realized he hadn’t said anything, you panicked. Trying to cover up your embarrassment, you just started spewing out word vomit.

“You know what? Forget I said anything. It’s clear that you are totally not ready to talk about that. I mean you probably have someone else in mind, right? I’m not the best looking. My jokes are subpar. I mean, I’m not even that confi--”

“In person?”

“Wait...what?”

“Do you want to see me in person?” Denki asked.

He was floored. The person, who he had feelings for, liked him back. For the first time in his life, the pick-up lines and corny jokes worked. He was truly himself and still got the prize: love.

“Yes,” you replied. “I really, really want to see you in person.”

“You can on one condition.”

You tilted your head, clearly confused by his statement. He chuckled at this and continued talking.

“You have to let me hold your hand.”

“What?”

“I like you too, IceStorm.”

Your online username coming out of his mouth made you smile so wide. It also could’ve been the fact that the guy you fell so hard for reciprocated your feelings.

“Want to meet at the café near your school on Sunday? At around 1?” you blurted, hoping that wouldn’t be too soon for him.

“Absolutely. Speaking of which,” he began, “I need to test out my newest pick-up line.”

You rolled your eyes, faking distaste, but on the inside, you wanted nothing more than to hear it. After all, he felt the same way about you. It was bound to make your heart soar even more now.

“Do you like coffee?” he smirked. “Because I like you a latte.”

You couldn’t help bursting out in laughter and blushing profusely. He, in turn, laughed with you and felt butterflies in his stomach. This continued for a couple of minutes before both of you could catch your breaths and refocus yourselves on the conversation.

You were ecstatic. He was elated. You actually did it. You admitted your feelings to the one guy you never thought you could have. You were everything to him. He would electrocute the whole world just for you to smile if necessary. It was as if fate had finally done its job.

Forgetting about his morning run with Kirishima, Denki started a new conversation about the latest Tik Tok he saw. You replied with your usual sarcasm to which he pretended to be mortified by your opinion.

It went on for hours. The two of you were genuinely happy. Hopefully, Denki would ask you on a date soon. Maybe, you might have to, but who knows.

Suddenly, in the midst of talking about plans after high school, a knock sounded on Denki’s door. He glanced at the clock and realized it was Kirishima.

“Be out in few!” he yelled, jumping out of bed.

He threw his phone down, which still had the call going, and got dressed at lightning speed. Once you had calmed down from laughing at his urgency, he picked up the phone and said something you’ll never forget.

“I’ll see you soon, my wonderful snowflake. Zapping out!”

#denki kaminari #kaminari x reader #denki x reader #denki kaminari x reader #bnha imagines #bnha fanfiction #bnha x reader #bnha scenarios #bnha #mha imagines #mha fanfiction #mha x reader #mha scenarios #mha #kaminari denki x reader #denki kaminari imagine #kaminari headcanons #denki imagine #denki headcanons #denki oneshot #kaminari oneshot

[sukirichi]

suk *ehem saeren (new pseud is sexy btw and also your new theme vvv sexc bestie!!!😌😌) okay so when i read chp 7-8 i was like ‘y/n c’mon. give kita the chance he deserves i mean IT’S THE MR. KITA SHINSUKE WTF WHAT MORE CAN YOU ASK?!’ but then oh god, the museum scene holy fuck. no because the cherry blossom tree works so well as an analogy for the main couple’s love story. yeah, cherry blossoms signify new beginnings and are mostly adorned by many when they bloom. why? aside from the indication of renewal, it only stays for a certain period of the year which is always a sight to see and because of the limited time frame, everyone knows the beauty it exudes will be gone after the time passes (death). going back, suna and y/n’s routine of spending time together to being away from each other’s presence is the recurring theme for them to grow. seeing them say too many goodbyes brings that anxious feeling of ‘ahh. it we will be back to square one again'  (also, not the fact that broken record connotes annoying repetition of something is aksjalks🤧) 

also yeah, when you love a person, the one should make you feel calm and secure and only then you can distinguish whether you truly love them or just merely an infatuation. but in y/n’s case, whether she has that rose-tinted glasses on or not, identifying the blaring red flags is hard to accept notice if that same marker is the one that brings her comfort due to its familiarity. and idk where to put this in my last ask because i don’t have enough brain juice to make a theory, but the way suna is nervous for his first date with mari, he should have second guessed why he’s acting like that when the happiness he felt with y/n is way more different with mari (should have listened to osamu and aran and ooh im sorry i assumed they samu and suna were schoolmates in high school when they are not akhfak). sure, he’s nervous out of excitement but for what? it's like foreshadowing that he needs to put up a front with mari just to keep her (but we all know that is not the case) in those 3 years they spent together, did he feel more on the edge than relaxed tho? 🤨

and for someone who loathes her half-sister, nagisa sure is invested with the happenings in y/n. it’s like she’s always on the lookout for her mistakes and dote it on her until her last breath. the mari and nagisa connection is possible though and it is not like they live countries apart but their meeting, from the way i see it, is like a silver lining for nagisa to topple y/n lol🤪 and aah, now it get why nagisa called y/n whore at the restaurant. when i read that part, i thought that they have somewhat lived under the same roof for some time but the succeeding chps showed they did not and was still confused because she has never shown any interest about what is going on with her affiliated family except hatred and then that happened. i guess when she burst out at that moment, it was when the two had met? 

it’s kinda disheartening to see how lucy subtly(??) controls y/n’s love life. maybe because she doesn’t want y/n to fall under the same category for marrying out of love when she is the one who refuses to divorce the dad (= she shouldn’t). should have filed that divorce, not doing so is a recipe for disaster itself. and mari 😤😤WHAT DID I SAY?? (well in this case, it is shunning others away from suna) i cannot, for my peace of mind, be able to be in the same vicinity as her. for all i know, i could be dragging her on the floor out of pure disgust. i can’t wait to find out who died and who is in critical condition. though, that critical scenario lead to afterlife too, so no wishful thinking here. but, ahh are we getting a background story for suna too?🥺 this is where i'm betting my wish at. while we’re at it, i wonder how atsumu will react to suna impregnating mari. i imagine he would say ‘dude wtf?! she chose you! how could you?!’ i know he is happy with his gf but can’t help to be caring as ever to y/n.

reading chps 7-9 in one go was a pleasant experience 1.because school😔🤢 2.angst is way more comforting than comedy 3.no more anxious thoughts of why and how this happened because at this point, i’m just playing hidden mickey here. but i truly love the story, can’t believe it’s already ending by the next update. saerennn i hope ur okay bub?🥺 and get that hashbrowns after finishing the series or while working for the last track. u deserve it!! luv u~💕💕

🍳

my egg anon, hello !! I’m so sorry for the late response, my asks were piled up and I got busy with school :<

AND AAAAAH THANK YOU I’M SO HAPPY YOU GOT THE MESSAGE OF THE CHERRY BLOSSOMS!! it was actually taken from the music video I linked back to the end of the chapter and my friend and I were discussing it because I think there were lots of symbolism on it. the one about new beginnings because the cherry blossoms only come for a certain time of the year before a new season comes also represents how YN and Suna keep going back and forth to loving, getting complicated, forgiving, getting complicated and so on and so forth. I love everything you said because it was exactly how I wanted the story to be like <33 the part about being anxious too !! that’s why YN keeps saying ‘this cycle never ends.’ and YESSSS THAT’S ALSO WHY I CHOSE BROKEN RECORDS AS THE TITLE. the ‘records’ refer to them playing love songs and then apology songs to each other over and over but then the song stops and they start to have new stories :<<

oooooh yes, totally. judging from my own experience, I can tell too whether it’s love or infatuation. when I’m with someone I love, I feel totally at peace and safe with them. it’s comfortable, it’s not supposed to be scary or nerve wracking. even if something wrong happened, you’re assured by the knowledge they’d be patient and listen to you. AND THIS PART WHERE YOU SAID THIS ABOUT SUNA ‘whether she has that rose-tinted glasses on or not, identifying the blaring red flags is hard to accept notice if that same marker is the one that brings her comfort due to its familiarity’ ITS 100% ACCURATE. same goes for suna tbh. YN was the one who broke his heart when they broke up but she was also the only able to comfort him. it’s hard for them to let each other go because they’re both a source of pain and familiarity that they struggle to find in this world. yes there’s some slight foreshadowing in how suna reacted with mari. he was on edge and he didn’t know what to do most of the time because he doesn’t understand mari the same way he understands YN. as for him being on edge, he most definitely was tiptoeing because mari placed a lot of boundaries such as keeping YN completely out of the picture and making her presence a bare minimum.

NOOOO BECAUSE THAT’S SO TRUE. Nagisa is always updated with YN. YN is the one who updates her about her life because she’s always trying to make conversation, but Nagisa pretends to be ‘uninterested’ although don’t let that fool you because she remembers every little detail just in case she can use it against her half sister. nagisa and mari met after mari broke up with suna in ch1 so yes, nagisa already knew the situation !! that’s why she called YN a ‘whore’ because if she ‘was with Suna’ then why is she also ‘dating’ Kita? so in nagisa’s eyes, YN is just the same as her mom.

lucy was half and half. sometimes she has good intentions but most of the time she’s also just messed in the head and she really fucked with YN’s trust issues. HMMM I WANTED A BACKGROUND STORY FOR SUNA TOO TBH but I didn’t know where to fit it and I didn’t want to add random, unnecessary details :<< AND FOR ATSUMUUUUU…. atsumu crushed on YN real hard… until now, even though he has a gf (now wife in the timeskip) you can tell he still cares about YN

NAUUUR angst is way more comforting than comedy sobs. and yes baby, I’m doing okay !! just a lil busy with uni work but nothing I can’t handle <33 THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THIS EGG ANON, I REALLY LOVE HEARING YOUR THOUGHTS ON IT BECAUSE YOU HAVE SUCH A BIG BRAIN AHHH I love you, stay safe too bb <33

#asks with naoya's trophy wife #series ( broken records ) #long ask #anon:🍳

[blondeblackwidow]

Could you write a fic about the Resistance meeting a Kenobi!reader who used to be Snokes old apprentice, and over time Poe begins to fall for her? I love your writing and if you do choose to write this request, the fluffier the better❤️

M e t a n o i a ( Poe Dameron x Reader )

prompt:  Could you write a fic about the Resistance meeting a Kenobi!reader who used to be Snokes old apprentice, and over time Poe begins to fall for her? I love your writing and if you do choose to write this request, the fluffier the better❤️ +  I’m the anon that sent the Kenobi!reader ask in, I forgot to say that the reader wasn’t Snokes apprentice willingly and she was taken as a child.

a/n; holy fuck i feel like i just poured my soul into this. this was something i played with a while on my own and i can’t get over how proud of it i am. thank you for this request, anon! i would zone out for hours just writing, and that hasn’t happen since like eighth grade. title is a greek word for a journey of self discovery.

song: the archer - taylor swift

t/w: slight mentions of child abduction and manipulation, very minor though.

w/c: 3150 ( omg )

-

D’Qar was loud, and the air was thick as it hit your skin. The sun hidden behind clouds, it was still considerably warmer than the Supremacy. You stepped off the transport, black boots hitting the pavement, the rest of you covered by the oversized brown robe. 

You’d never seen Leia Organa before. But you knew her son, and the minute you saw her eyes, you knew who she was.

You lowered your hood. “General.” You breathed with a smile. She greeted you with a handshake, and the most comforting of smiles. She radiated a motherly energy you had never known, not in this life at least. 

“Welcome, I’m so happy you got here safely, and you took me up on my offer.” 

“It seems our families can never live without each other.” You responded, and Leia gestured you further into the base. 

“Let’s talk in my office, and I’ll see about getting you something with some color.” She guided you amongst crowds. Her office was small by most standards, but felt comfortable and homely. She took a seat and you followed suit.

The air was tense, full of unanswered questions. 

“He’s alright, doing well, all things considered.” You offered, and her shoulders seemed to relax.

“You didn’t have to..” She started, and you waved your hand.

“It’s nothing, I know you must hold your breath everyday when it comes to him.” You spoke softly, as if people were listening. “He talked about you a few times, it was always brief, but he did.” 

“Thank you.” Leia reached out and squeezed your hand. The door opened behind you two and you saw a man, standing in the doorway, holding a wad of clothing.

“Ma’am Pava sent me in here with these.” He held up what looked like a shirt and pants. “She said you asked if she had spare uniforms?” 

“Well yes because she’s always in her pajamas or her flight suit.” Leia reached her hand out and he gave them to her, sparing you a cautionary glance. “All of black squadron seems to operate that way.” 

He opened his mouth to object, but she kept talking. “This is Poe Dameron, one of my top commanders and pilots.”

“THE top pilot, ma’am.” He turned to fully look at you, and you introduced yourself.

“She and I have family history.” Leia answered before Poe could ask. He didn’t take his eyes off you though.

“Have I met you before?” You swallowed thickly, clamming up to find a lie. You remembered him as soon as he started talking. 

“The Resistance will not be intimidated by you.” He struggled out to breathe.

“We’ll see.” Kylo said from in front of you, not yet aware that you had entered the room. The man you now know as Poe starts to scream.

“Ren, you’re needed by the supreme leader.” Most of your face covered by a hood, you avoid the curious gaze from the chair in front of you both.

“It’s in a droid, a BB unit.” He barked on his way out. You take one glance at the man before you leave, hesitating.

“No, I don’t believe we have.” You forced a smile. “It’s been a pleasure though.” You turned your gaze back to Leia, who cleared her throat.

“You’re excused, Commander.” He took a breath to object, but it died on his tongue. He offered a small smile and excused himself.

“I was there, when Ren…” You trailed off, staring at the now closed door. “How am I supposed to….”

“He may look tough, but he’s got his mother’s heart.” She sighed, standing and collecting a few more things. “He’ll understand, probably more than most.”

“I hope so.” Leia smiled and gestured toward the door. 

The quarters she gave you were smaller than yours on the Supremacy, but far less daunting. Glossy black walls had been replaced with cracked stone, this whole base a work in progress.The uniforms were more relaxed, and people smiled as you walked past, though you couldn’t shake the feeling that they saw right through you. Cracked foundations were held together by hope, maybe here, you thought, you could start to heal what Snoke shattered. 

You were going to go out and explore. You grabbed an old brown satchel, and went to place your saber inside. It was silver with a gold band around the emitter, black striping down the sides bleeding into the solid black band around the hilt, gold circles breaking up the darkness. Kylo thought little of it, said it looked too much like a Kenobi’s lightsaber. For once in your life though, you were happy you had something to remind you of the light that coursed through your veins. It would need a new crystal, the old one corrupted by the dark side, but that was a question for Leia at a later time.

The walk to the airfield was peaceful, on the ship, all you had was recycled air. But there was something about the breeze and the smell of wildflowers and trees. And if you were honest, the smell of the engines burning fuel was better than the nothingness that you had become accustomed to. 

Your eyes quickly set sight on the obnoxious X Wing that sat front and center. Black with an orange stripe, while it was Hux’s responsibility to know the specs of the Resistance, you knew that it was the ship that always meant trouble. You walked up to it and ran a hand down the side. The side panels were rough against your hand, but you liked it here, the perfection of the First Order became suffocating after a while.

“Can I help you?” A voice behind you asked. You turned to see the man from earlier, Poe, you think his name was. 

“Oh no, I’ve just never seen an X Wing in person before.” You laughed. “They’re just so legendary in my mind.”

“You a pilot?” He asked, walking closer. His black hair was messy, and there was grease on his orange flight suit.

You shook your head. “Oh no, my grandpa flew A Wings during the Clone Wars but other than that we’re a pretty ground bound family.” 

“Was your grandpa a clone?” Poe asked, and you furrowed your brows. 

“No?”

“Well because droids were used by the separatists and clones by the republic.” He laughed. “So unless your grandfather was a clone, that doesn’t work.” 

“There were civilians in the Republic.” You rolled your eyes. 

“I guess.” He shrugged his shoulders, you knew he didn’t buy it. But you were okay with it, it was something to talk about at another time. A reason to talk to him again.

“You have pilots in your family?” You asked, leaning against the warm metal of the body of the ship.

“Uh yeah, my mom.” He cleared his throat. “She flew A Wings.” He raised his finger to note the similarity. “But for the Rebels against the Empire.” 

“Sounds like a kickass woman.” You smiled. He shifted his weight and looked at his boots.

“Yeah, she was.” He smiled. You could sense the discomfort, and the loss. 

“So how long have you been with the Resistance?” 

“I’ve never met such a bold new recruit you know.” He laughed.

“Blame it on the family connection.” You laughed in return.

“What is the mysterious connection?” He asked, taking a step closer.

“Can’t give up all my secrets on the first day here.” You smirked. But how were you supposed to explain it all? Your father was a hidden bastard child from the days of Mandalore, your mother died before you could walk, you’re competition in training was the General’s son who was named after your grandfather who the General called to before Alderaan’s Doom – and that was just the surface level of it all.

“I’ll have to come bug you another time then.” You tried to hide the rising heat in your cheeks. 

“It’s a small base, you can come find me.” You smiled and pushed off the ship. “I’ll see you around.” 

“See you around, newbie.” You rolled your eyes, and kept walking.

You and Poe spent days on and off together, chatting, laughing, unknowingly being watched by Leia with a motherly smile. He radiated an energy unlike you had ever known, it was warm, and bright, and full of love. It was the light, the light that you were ordered to swear off for the rest of your days since you were a child. 

Leia felt like the mother you had never known. The both of you aching for something taken so long ago. You spent a lot of time with her, causing a lot of questions. 

Poe jumped to your defense everytime. Causing even more questions.

“Do you know where I can get a Kyber Crystal?” You piped up, reading in Leia’s private office while she worked.

“Why?” She just glanced up. You sighed.

“Mine won’t heal itself, no amount of meditation will ever make it change, not even to white. My blade still glows red.” You closed your book and turned to face her. A devilish grin grew on her face. “What?” 

“After Luke lost the temple, he gave his remaining crystals to someone he trusted for safekeeping against the rising order.” The grin grew more. 

“Where are they?”

“Yavin IV.” She smiled.

“Okay I’ll go to Yavin–”

“At Kes Dameron’s home.” Your jaw hit the floor. You felt like you had known Poe all your life, and maybe in another life you would have, but you really only knew him for a month or so. 

So now you had to ask to meet his dad, when you hadn’t even admitted to yourself you liked him. 

“I’m gonna have to ask him to go with me.” You breathed out, slightly nervous all of a sudden. 

“Relax, Poe needs to go home anyways, it’ll get Kes off my back.” You snorted. 

“And how do I approach that?” You started. Unaware of the door opening behind you. “Poe I need you to take me to your childhood home so I can get a crystal from your father because I secretly have a lightsaber and come from the lineage of a Jedi Master in the Old Republic, who trained both Vader and Luke?” You inhaled, unaware of how fast you were just talking. “I’m sure that’s a very easy question to ask.” 

“The answers’ yes, I just have a few questions first.” 

You thought you were gonna die right then and there.

The flight to Yavin wasn’t very long, but felt like years. The transport was small, Leia was unwilling to give up her large ships for the two of you. 

“So how long have you been a Jedi?” He asked, shifting the controls and turning to face you.

“I’m not a jedi.” You mumbled.

“Well you have a lightsaber. That’s a very jedi thing to have.” Of course in your oblivious confession, you didn’t include how you acquired the weapon.

“I don’t want to talk about it.” You got up from the copilots seat now that you were in Hyperspace, wanting to be anywhere but under his gaze. He grabbed your forearm to stop you, and your skin burned at the touch.

“I have met you before.” He whispered. “You were on that ship.” 

“I’m so sorry.” Your voice was broken full of shame. “I didn’t have a choice.”

“Why were you there?” His eyes were locked on yours.

“I was a child, my father was on the run after Mandalore’s downfall. They caught us after a few years.” You sighed. “My father was killed, but Snoke knew of my lineage, said that because my grandfather created Vader, I had a capacity for greatness.” You shifted your weight and sat back into the chair. “I didn’t know the difference, I was so young, with this weird energy flowing through me that I couldn’t control.” 

“It’s okay.” He relaxed his hand and brought it back to his lap, you tried to hide your disappointment at the lack of touch. “You’re safe now.”

“Thank you.” You whispered, and you both sat in safe, comfortable silence before the ship made its entrance to the Yavin system.

Yavin IV, you’d come to realize, was a lot like D’Qar, luscious green trees and warm summer breeze. The Dameron home was a black and white contrast to anything you had known. Poe, on the other hand, doesn’t welcome the energy, instead tenses, as if he is in fear of what lies ahead.

“I’ll do the talking, if you want?” You offer, and Poe shakes his head.

“It’s alright.” He sighs. “How do you tell someone that the ideals they spent their life fighting are growing stronger everyday?”

“You tell them that there’s hope.” You smile softly. “Hope is the only thing you have that they don’t.” The weight of your blood red lightsaber seams to double, and none of this seems doable.

He starts to walk toward the house and you are left with no choice but to follow. He opens the door to find an older man with the same tone of skin, and same curly hair, faded now to a silver, working on something at the table. 

“Hey dad.” You want to hide behind Poe’s shadow.

How do you tell someone that the ideals they spent their life fighting are standing in front of them in their dining room?

“Poe!” He exclaimed with a smile, and gave his son a large hug. “Leia warned me you were coming. Who’s this?” He asked, returning to the neutral position.

“Oh this is Captain…” He trailed, remembering he’d never learned your last name.

“Kenobi.” You smiled, your chest swelling with pride at the surname you discarded so long ago. Recognition and surprise flashed among both men’s faces.

“I would assume you’re here for the crystals.” He winked.

“How did you…”

“A feeling, I guess.” He shrugged and began to search through a container, and Poe just mouthed your surname back to you with shock and wonder. You waved your hand to dismiss him. “Poe can you run this down to the lady down the road, the one who always gave you sweets after Shara said no?” He gestured to the project he was working on, and Poe opened his mouth to protest. 

But just like with Leia, it died long before he could manage words. He scooped it up and gave you an apologetic glance before leaving.

“Can I see it?” was the first thing Kes asked after his son’s departure.

“Y-Yeah.” You stumbled and pulled out the saber from your bag, handing it to him. He placed a small brown bag on the table with a quiet clink, and began to smile. 

“It resembles Luke’s second saber..” He looked at you. “Made with pieces of Ben Kenobis.” You couldn’t help but return the smile.

“It’s the same style, according to old texts.” You said. “Not exactly the same I’m afraid.” 

“What’s the need for a new crystal?” He handed it back.

“I..” You hesitated. Poe forgives so easily, but Leia said that was his mother, not Kes. “I was taken in by Snoke when I was young, trained..” You swallowed, staring at the saber in your hands. “I want to make things right, I can’t do that with red blades, the crystal is too broken to heal, I need to start anew.” Kes’ shoulders relaxed and he leaned against the table.

“I am sorry.” 

“For?”

“Had we done it right the first time, there never would have been a Snoke to corrupt your gift.” He smiled sadly, you reached for his hand and gave it a light squeeze.

“Had you done it the first time, I would have never met him.” You smiled. “And there will always be those who want destruction, but as long as there is more hope, then we’ll always have peace.” Tears welled up in your eyes, you were talking more to yourself, but he pulled you into a hug, and you cried, for the first time in years.

“I know a place where you can install that.” He said, releasing the hug, and you followed him to a large tree in the field. It hummed with energy. Not evil or good, not light or dark, just balanced force.

You sat on your knees in front, placing a crystal next to your saber, Kes walking away to give you a moment. You closed your eyes and pictured it all, the darkness, the mistakes, being swept away by light, and forgiveness. You opened them to reveal your reassembled saber, and the cracked crystal next to it. You decided to bury it with the tree, putting to rest your conflict, your guilt, and anger.

And Igniting your forgiveness, certainty, and compassion in a deep blue light. 

“A True Kenobi.” Kes said from afar, Poe just watching in awe as the sun set behind the mountains. You disabled the saber and wore it proudly on your belt.

“Thank you.” Was all you could manage, walking back toward the older of the two rebels.

“Don’t even worry about it.” He squeezed your shoulder, and walked back toward the house. 

“Bonfire?” Poe asked, and you couldn’t help but laugh.

“Yes.”

The night fell rather quickly after the sun set, and the summer breeze gave a chill while you and Poe sat on a log and exchanged dumb jokes and he filled you in on all the need to know information. A silence fell over you soon enough and he just stared at you over his shoulder.

“Kenobi, huh?” He laughed. “My grandpa flew A-Wings.” He mocked

“You’re an ass.” You rolled your eyes.”He did!” You defended. 

“He was a kriffing Jedi that is the least interesting thing you could have said!” 

“Sorry my life story isn’t entertaining.” You punched his arm and he acted fake hurt.

“Oh it definitely is.” He poked. “They’ll write myths about you.”

“Hopefully about the good to come, not the bad that’s passed.” You half smiled. 

“I hope it’s all of it, more inspiring that way.” He locked eyes with yours.

“Me being a trained sith apprentice doesn’t scare you?” He shook his head. 

“No. Sith, Jedi, call it what you want but I just see a beautiful woman who is strong enough to know right from wrong.” He tucked a hair behind your ear. “And that means more than making things float.” He leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to your lips and your heart forgot how to keep a rhythm. 

You were sure Obi Wan was up there cursing about the Old Jedi Code and falling in love, or whatever. The best part was, you didn’t love Poe.

but you know you could, given time. 

And for once in your life you weren’t scared.

#poe dameron #poe dameron x reader #poe dameron fanfiction #poe dameron x oc #star wars #star wars fanfiction #star wars x reader #star wars imagine

[aw-eather]

Heather Watches SG1: s2ep22 Out of Mind and s3ep01 Into the Fire

Ah two of my all time favourites. Maybe even THE favourites. They’re just SO good. Also my shipper heart cannot take it but we love torturing ourselves here so lets go. 

I’m gonna try and do enough that y’all get at least one post a day and scheduel them to go up periodically :) 

This go very long so I hope it posts properly. 

Ooooh mysterious tank

I mean honestly this was suspicious from the get go

Don’t trust this guy

JACK

YOU’RE ALL WET JACK

Is he? 

Are they dead tho? Are you sure? Cause that sounds fake... 

You see, the year is now.............. 2077

CREDITS

Teal’c looks all big and scary but really he’s a precious boy

End credits

TERYL ROTHERY

honestly that device looks very Star Trek

Missed opportunity to make a 69 joke

Girl he has been asleep for 79 years he probably remembers shit all 

Good boy, answer nothing. Don‘t trust the random men that woke you up

thats not sarcasm, I don’t trust them either 

“the rest of the facility” riiiiiight

Wizard of Oz reference

38 teams is a lot of teams

MMMMMMMM sounds FAKE

DON’T TRUST HIM JACK

General whats his face just dropped something on the ground

STARGATE

Jack is handsome

Me: I’m gay

Jack O’Neill: Yeah sure ya bethcha 

Are ya just? What makes ya think Jack can help? he’s been asleep for 79 years

Tok’ra mind probe

Benefical alliance my ass, what did they ever really do for the Tau’ri??

Except promise to send a ship when they “had one available”

So thinking of Sam right now would be BAD Jack. 

NOX

I LOVE THE NOX

WHAT CUTIES

look at them, they’re so sweet

Jack stop thinking and showing them shit 

Could be a great weapon but the Nox are peaceful and beautiful and I love them

LITTLE GREY ALIENS WITH THE LITTLE GREY BUTTS

Thats a big ship

This is the only “look at all the shit we’ve managed to do so far” episode that is actually any good

Why don’t we meet the Furlings?

I wanna meet them 

They sound fluffy

I love the baby asgards look at ‘em so cuuuuute

Kathrine! You’re great girly

“Touch it” *Jack touches it without knowing what it does, could die*

Jack waving his gun to touch the molecules seems like a bad idea

Yeah let him rest stop bullying him

purple goop

stop the pruple goop Jack

purple goop is never a good thing

Oh look... ANOTHER tank

DANNY BOY

Please cover your nipples

I don’t wanna see your man nipples

A third tank... funny that

SSSSAAAAAAMMMMMM

Funny how none of them are ACTUALLY dead

LIES WE’VE JUST SEEM THEM

Get these people some clothes

leaving her wrapped in a blanket is rude

Blanket looks like a mat tbh

BRATAC

SKARRA

Daniels hair is so bad in this episode I’m not sorry its HORRIBLE 

He has a SHIELD Jack

FUCK YEAH JACK THROW THAT KNIFE YAS

HATHOR

I love Hathor hosts

She’s great honestly

Sam and janet and the girls kicking ass is the best

RIP Hathor 

No seriously Daniel’s hair is BAD

Teal’c

JANET

ah yes, unusual 

Teal’c is so passionate and caring about his friends I love him so much

THREE FUCKING WEEKS?!?!?!?!

janet is such an angel you can’t convince me otherwise

Are they tho? 

Yeah he would but Teal’c with do anything for his F A M I L Y

Well he will leave

Aw Teal’c I love you with my entire heart

That zoom in on the patch is nice 

YES JACK STOP THE GOOP

Nice kick! 

BYE TEAL’C I LOVE YOU

AWW THIS EXCHANGE IS SO NICE 

AW THE SALUTE BABE NO THAT HURTS MY HEART ITS SO SWEET

#SorryNotSorry but Jack looks so fucking good in this outfit 

Like... he looks sooooo good

God I am questioning my sexuality left right and centre today

But seriously can he dress like that more often? 

Go get ya girl, Jack!

Oh look... not the SGC 

WHO WOULD HAVE EVER GUESSED

Serpant and Horus guards! :O

STOP THINKING BABE

THEY GONNA FIND YOOOOOU

SAAAAAAAAAM

BEAT THIS GUYS ASS AND SAVE. YOUR. GIRL

O U C H THAT WOULD FUCKING HURT

SHOULDER TOUCHING 

SHOULDER RUBBING

SHOULDER TOUCHING 

SHE IS TOUCHING HIM

I THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD FOLLOWED BY A MEMORY OF HIM NEARLY DYING 

SHE’S STILL HOLDING HIS SHOULDER

STARING AT HER NAKED BACK

TRYING NOT TO STARE AT HER NAKED BACK

HE IS SO IN TROUBLE 

HE FANCIES HER SO MUCH 

I MEAN SAME

she also looks good but like he looks better???

GRABBING

WALL HOLDING

HANDS TOUCHING SHOULDERS

PINKY CURLED IN SO HE DOESN’T TOUCH BARE SKIN

COULD HAVE MOVED BUT ISN’T MOVING 

THEY WANNA HOLD EACH OTHER

DEAR GOD

sorry I’ll stop with the caps

I just physically cannot with those two

i love them so much

and i hate how they were treatd

Hathor you idiot, 

SUANNE

LOL Jack 

Servants in the royal court? Yeah sounds great

Rude Jack

lol the pat on the shoulder Jack you dick

uuuuuuhhhhh didn’t notice before how HOT IT IS WHEN HATHOR RUNS THE IDC REMOTE UNDER SAMS CHIN AND THE LOOK SAM GIVES HER I-

ACK SNAKE

I hate them the same way Jack does tbh

they make me squirm

Give it to Daniel. Why is Daniel the only one that never has a snake in him... wait... 

sorry but I just wanna talk with the national captions institute... 

Alright! On to Into the Fire! 

DAVIS

MAJOR DAVIS I LOVE YOU

MY FAVOURITE

I LOVE YOU SO MUCH EVEN IF THINGS DO FALL TO SHIT WHENEVER YOU’RE THERE

Dramatic zooooom on Hathors name for E M P H A S I S 

CREDITS

I love how Hammond is like EVERYONE is saving SG1

How DARE you, Daivs. They are THE team, rude!

I love that everyone steps forward because everyone loves SG1 but also everyone knows you don’t leave anyone else behind. 

I love Hammond

MARTIN WOOD :O

He is a great director

Ew snake

Jack still looks fucking good 

Jack now is not the time for sass 

Give it to Daniel. No one cares

Sam is like “I’m not scared bitch bring it”

Of course it wants Jack

Poor Jack

Why is it always him?? 

You tried, buddy

Sam’s hand on his CHEST PLEASE JUST GET MARRIED

TEAL’C 

BRATAC

Sam literally hates watching Jack in any pain 

Poor Jack

Hathor fuck off

What exactly was the point of ripping his shirt? It makes no difference to the snake going in the back of HIS HEAD

Ew

oh gross

i hate it

I hate it so much

ugh the chills I currently have

Suanne Baun is super pretty though

YAS TOK’RA LADY

WE RESPECT AND LOVE YOU

Another Wizard of Oz reference 

Sorry Daniel looks so bad

its the hair honestly, the little dorky fringe

Sam’s hair, on the other hand *chefs kiss*

Yeah but he’ll be fine, Tok’ra lady saved the day <3 

YAS GIRL

NOOO Poor Tok’ra lady

Sorry fam, I forgot her name lol 

Sam pulling that jacket on, Sam in a jacket thats a little too big for her , Sam in a white shirt.. Sam

Yeah they are Teal’c. 

Dead and false and dead... or is he???

Hand dance

Energy barrier is in the way, boys continue to shoot

oh no shooting towers of death are never a good sign

And of course Daniel got hurt so we have to baby him for the rest of the fucking episode jfc just sit him down somewhere and Sam and the rest of the teams can do the hard work... again

Cool Tok’ra tunnels are Cool

Lol Daniel being sassy (oh its just a deep, bleeding gash, it’ll be fine) lol sorry he is funny when he’s sassy

I’m sick of your army already, Hathor

OOOOH a barrier 

Hammond is awaiting 

Why do they give them such short time periods to do shit? Like they know things go wrong literally ALL THE TIME 

Like “hi you have 24 hours to go into a SECURE, GOA’ULD FACILITY, RETRIEVE THREE SG MEMBERS AND GET OUT. PIECE.OF.CAKE”

6 hours is a long time to sit on your hands and do nothing tho. Ah well might as well go and save the boyfriend

The president can suck a rotten potatoe

Davis, you can’t really argue with him, he outranks you about 4 times

Sam’s sleeves are too long and baggy and its SO CUTE

GO SAM

SAVE THE DAY

BUT SAVE YOUR BOYFRIEND FIRST 

Hammond visiting Chulak 

because he’s an angel baby

and the best dad ever to his four kids; Major Dr Science Space Baby, Sassy Grumpy Fruit Loop and Sam Carter Loving Space Baby, Warrior Gentle Giant Space Baby and Annoying, Doesn’t know shit, Archaeologist Space Baby.

Yas Teal’c, spill that tea

I will join you, bb

Hammond in a toga will also join you cause he a babe

and he needs your help cause Davis said No. 

HAMMOND OF TEXAS IS MY FAVOURITE THING EVER I LOVE IT 

Sam: I’m gonna go and shut this shield down

Sam: but not until I have tried to save my Future Husband. 

Poor Tok’ra lady

Hand on chest again

Fucking Hathor man

Go away boo, you’re ruining the moment 

Stop hurting Sam

YAS JACK FUCK YES I LOVE THAT

I love his response to it too

Like the shock and fear

This hug goes on a long time

I know he’s cold or whatever but like... 

and I know he’s in shock and so is she a bit

he’s doing it for her as much as him

but they’re STILL hugging

They literally never do this again

Its so sweet because after this its just... nothing? Like POV happens and then Upgrade and Divide and Conquer and they go ah fuck we can’t hug anymore so all we get is platonic shoulder holding and using shoulders as pillows. The closes we get to a hug is Death Knell and emotional trauma Threads. I want a REAL hug

And he holds her arms for ages and helps her up

Wow they’re so fucking in love this hurts

“Found ‘em” Jack stop so cute

C4! Who’d have thought it

Ah shit they’re surrounded 

He still looks good

They BOTH look good 

They make a great couple 

Nope, not really but its what ya got so you’re gonna have to deal with it

This general guy is a bit of a dick

Thats right Sam, don’t listen. Good job, Danny boy.

Only 1? Thats not a lot of time

Get out there, Jack! Buy that time

Gun Bum! (if you know Sanctuary, you’ll get it)

He’s really not doing a great job of pretending to be a Goa’uld

Its really not impossible 

ex-goddess lol 

“She’s Gone. She is no more.” I’m honestly shocked people didn’t shoot him more often 

I love him tho

Thank god, thats good timing

Hammond is IN. HIS. ELEMENT 

There is no way she heard hiom say now but she still knew. I love them. I love how well they know each other and they’ve only known each other a little over two years

Time to KICK SOME ASS

JAFFA YAS

ooh coming in from behind, sneaky

YEEHAW

OH HAMMOND YOU PRECIOUS BABY

Sam going straight to Jack and it looks like she goes to put her arm around him. 

I hate them ffs

Bra’tac and Human fuck me thats so cute

Sam’s smile when they see Teal’c and Hammond is Gorgeous

and Hammond patting her on the back! stop! I love Space Dad and his idiot Space babies. 

Final Thoughts:

Seriously guys this is my favourite Final and First eps of a season. 

100% one of my favourite two parters, if not my all time favourite two parter

Great direction, good story, excellent bad guys, good acting, just enough suspense with out being too drawn out, something for everyone, comes of the back of a fun as fuck episode (1969), Hammond has a big part, Davis is there, lots of cute Sam/Jack and of course, Daniel’s Elf Hair. 

Also the Tok’ra are actually useful in this one which is SHOCKING 

Lemme know your thoghts friends, I’m excited to hear them! 

#Stargate SG1 #Stargate #SG1 #SG1: Out of Mind #SG1: Into the Fire #Samantha Carter #Jack O'Neill #Daniel Jackson #Teal'c #Hathor #Suanne Braun #Amanda Tapping #ATapps #AT #Richard Dean Anderson #RDA #Michael Shanks #Christopher Judge #Mudblood-and-proud watches #my faves #no seriously #i fucking love em

[geo-winchester]

PROMISES

Summary: Poe get marry with the love of his life but things didn’t happen as they thought they would be.

A/N: hi! I just want to say that this is a little sad, sorry for that! I try to write it yesterday but I don’t know what happened to my hand that it hurt when I move my fingers, but luckily it’s better now😁

Warnings: a little of cursing and character death.

MASTERLIST

————————

As Poe was getting ready to go he couldn’t stop thinking in his wife, he meet her when he join in the resistance, at first he thought that she was only another pilot but when she told him that she want to introduce him to her mother it turn out that she was the daughter of General Leia, and even then, he knew he want to spend the rest of his life with her, maybe it was the way she smile or the way he look at him but he always feel like home when he was around her, but he didn’t expect any of what was happening. It all start as a headache, one day when he was coming back from a mission, he get out of the x-wing expecting to see Yn in the hangar waiting for him but when he didn’t saw her he start to get worried, after a quick talk with Leia he went to his room to check if Yn was there, he feel how his body relax when he saw her sleep in the bed curl in one of his jackets, he couldn’t help but smile and sit in the edge of the bed.

-Hey honey- he softly said making her wake up, at first she look at him confuse but when she recognized him she hug him.

-You’re back early- she said with a smile.

-Kind of, just a few minutes- he said with a weak smile.

-Oh, shit! What time is it?- she asked.

-A little after 4...

-What? I want...-but she couldn’t finish, Poe kiss her, deeply, something he was expecting for a long time.

-Wait... are you suppose to be waiting for me in the hangar?- she nod.

-That was an option- she said.

-What was the other option?

-Wait here- she said and she start to kiss his ear -with just this jacket on...

-Fuck me- he said.

-I’m suppose to be the one who said that- both of them laugh and he kiss her again, but she stop and groan.

-Are you ok?

-Yeah, just a little headache

But her headache just got worst and worst and when one day he found her on the floor of the bathroom he didn’t hesitate to take her to the Med bay, he stay by her side every day as the doctors made some test, and he was the moment they told them what was going on, it was that moment when the whole world of Poe stop for a moment, the headache was causing by a tumor on her brain, even if his heart was breaking he knew he had to be strong for his wife, when the doctor start to talk about the treatments he hold her hand and gave him a weak smile, after the doctor left the room she couldn’t fight it anymore and she start to cry.

-Hey it’s ok- he said as he hug her -everything is going to be fine, you hear the doctor, they can cut it out, and I’m going to be here with you all the time- he said as he kiss her hands.

-Even if I’m bald?- he smile.

-Even if your bald.

The day of the surgery Poe show up in the room with none a single hair in his head just like she was in that moment, she couldn’t help but laugh when she saw him, and he knew he do what ever it take to keep hearing that sound.

-What did you do?

-What? You don’t like my new look?- she nod as he sit on the bed.

-But you had to admit that I look better- she said.

-You always look gorgeous- she smile as he put an arm around her.

-I’m scare- she whisper.

-I’m not, your going to be just fine- he said, but he knew he was just as scare as she was -we’re going to beat this together and when this is over, we’re going to go to the beach.

-you promise?

-I promise- he said as he kiss her -And you know maybe we could try to have one those little humans- he said making her smile.

-You mean kids?

-So that’s how they call them?- she nod -Well we could try to have one, if you want, you know have our own family.

-I already have one, you are-she said -But we could try- he kiss her, after a few seconds some of the nurse get to the room to take her, he gave her a quick kiss on the forehead.

-I’ll be waiting here- she nod quickly.

But no matter how many god thoughts they had, she didn’t get any better, even if she try to hide it, Poe notice the tiredness in her, most of the times he stay by her side in their little room and sometimes she stay in the hangar as he fix his ship, most of the times BB-8 stay by her side, specially when he go on a mission, like that night, when he get to his room, Yn was sleeping in the bed with BB-8 by her side with the hat he gave her after his last mission, when the droid saw his master he roll to him and beep with joy.

-Hey buddy- he whisper and the droid beep again -slow down, you’re going to wake up her up.

-Too late- He hear the voice of his wife, he went to her and sit by his side -how does the mission went?

-Ah you know, it was pretty easy, for your badass husband.

-Do I have another husband?- she said laughing after a moment they both stay silence -You know what I miss? I miss my X- wing and fly over the galaxy...

-I though you would say that you miss me...

-Nah I was having fun with BB-8, at least he didn’t gave me this awful hat- he start to tickling her -Ok, ok I take it back, I love this hat.

-You know, you sometimes are a difficult woman and you are lucky I love you.

The next morning Poe make the arrangements for a free time with Yn, Leia didn’t hesitate to give it to him and everything he need. When he finally get back to his room, she was in her wheelchair as she keep looking at her in the mirror, he could see the sadness in her eyes as she saw every change of her body, after he knock the door she weep the few tears on her eyes.

-I had a surprise for you- he said with a wide smile.

-if is another hat, I had to tell you...

-No is not a hat... but your going to love it- he said as he push her to the millennial falcon.

-You bring me here to saw the millennial?

-No just that, remember that I promise you something?

-that your going to let your bear grow?

-the other thing, the one with a beach.

Even if they didn’t expect to be here with her condition, they did everything to enjoy the day together, they talk about everything they could, even the gossips they wish they were true or what they think about the news in the resistance, when the sun start to come dawn, Poe pick a few branches and make a firewood. She hadn’t realize that he had a guitar close.

-where did you get that?

-what do you mean, I play it all the time.

-No since we get married.

-That’s because I had something else to play with- he said with a smirk, he play a few notes and he look at her -do you remember this song?- she nod as she smile -the most wonderful girl accept to dance with me and I couldn’t help to feel like the luckiest man in the world, the prettiest woman in the galaxy was in my arms, and the I meet you- she punch him in the arm -I’m kidding, Your the best thing that ever happen to me- he said and he start to sing in every part of the song, he didn’t take his eyes away from hers, when he finish the song, she get close and cup his cheek and kiss him gently, he sit behind her after he put the guitar away, he hug her from behind and kiss her temple, they stay quiet as they see the sunset.

-Poe- she call him as she look at him -can I ask you a favor?

-Sure.

-I know you once made a promise to me- she said.

-If you want another hat, I hide it on the Millennial...

-No, Poe, I’m not talking about that promise- she said serious -I’m talking on the day we got married... you told me that I’m going...

-That you’re going to be the only girl in my life- she nod.

-I need you to broke that promise...

-Yn...

-No, listen to me, if I don’t make it...

-Please don’t talk that way- Poe tried his best to not break in tears.

-I just need to know that you’re going to be fine.

-Let’s not think about that, let’s just enjoy the moment, ok?- She nod.

-So, you had another hat for me?- he nod weeping the tears.

But the pain he felt that day on the beach, was nothing compare with the pain he feel when he look at her in the bed on the med bay, her mother was by her side and rub her forehead, she told her that she was going to be fine and that she would keep an eye on Poe making her smile, Poe got close to the bed he take her hand and try his best smile, he came as quick as he could, when the doctor told him it was time to say goodbye.

-I’m going to give you some time a lone- both of them nod.

-it’s ok baby- he start to said -You can go know, I’m going to be fine...

-Poe... promise me... you’re going to fall in love again- he nod, even if he was lying, he tried to give him the peace she need in that moment, she touch his cheek making him look at her eyes -can you sing to me?

-Wise... men say- he start, even if he didn’t sing it right he try his best -only fools rush in...

-But I cant... help... falling in love with you- she whisper -I love you, Poe Dameron...

-I will always love you, Yn solo- she smile as she close her eyes and took her last breath -Yn...- when he fee the weight of her hand become heavier, he start to cry -Leia!- he scream -Leia!- he scream again, after what he felt like a century she get to the room and when she saw the scene she knew what happens, Poe keep kissing her temple -Please, come back, please...- when he feel Leia’s hand on his shoulder, he turn around and hug her tightly -She’s gone, Leia, she’s gone... I can’t do this... I need her- Leia didn’t said anything she just stay there mourning her daughter with his son in law.

#poe dameron x reader #poe dameron x solo!reader #poe x reader #poe dameron imagine #poe dameron

[shadowynnn]

star-crossed | part one |

star wars

pairing: ben solo/kylo ren x reader x general armitage hux

soulmate au

a/n: Due to names having significance in the soulmate aspect of this fanfic, the reader will have a name designated to better coincide with the soulmarks I have planned for each person. :)

~~~

“When you turned me down and said you had big plans for your birthday, Sol, I expected something a little more...I don’t know...big?”

Upon hearing your partner’s familiar voice, you rolled out from beneath the X-Wing you had been tinkering with and peered up at his hovering figure.

“I decided to fix up your precious X-Wing out of the goodness of my heart and this is the thanks I get, Dameron?” With a roll of your eyes, you attempted to keep the smile his words brought at bay as you sat up and unwrapped the bandanna tied around your thigh to wipe away the sweat threatening to pour into your eyes from hours of work. “You’re welcome, by the way,” you added, a smile finally breaking its way through as you quirked an eyebrow at the man, silently savoring the way his mouth twitched at your previous use of his last name.

“I just can’t believe you’d rather spend your special day with my starfighter instead of me.” Poe shook his head, faking a pout as he outstretched his hand towards you. “I mean, I really thought we were getting somewhere after our last mission together-you got a little smudge there, by the way” 

You wiped at the grease spot Poe had mentioned before taking his extended hand and letting him pull you to your feet. Your face scrunched up as your partner’s words brought up memories of the Kowakian ape-lizard. It had seemed to take weeks before you had finally managed to erase its scent from your mind and his reminder brought the pungent scent rushing back.

“Don’t go acting all bruised on me now, Poe.” You gave your partner a pointed look, throwing the memories of that mission far behind as you plopped yourself down on a nearby tool bench and took a long swig out of your canteen. “You know I don’t like celebrating my birthday.”

You meant the words in a casual manner but felt your demeanor fall as thoughts you had tried to push away by tinkering on Poe’s starfighter came tumbling back. Images of that terrible night rushed through your mind in swift flashes of fire, smoke, and blood. Nearly five years had passed but you could still hear the screams of the dying and feel the heat of the flames as they ravaged the temple. But worst of all, you could still clearly picture the boy whose name was slowly etching itself across your chest as he had begged for you to join him. And while you never dared mention the thought out loud, you couldn’t help but think it was all because of you.

As if sensing where your thoughts had tumbled, you felt a hand lightly brush across your bare thigh. Following his line of sight, you watched as Poe’s fingers gently trailed across the sweeping black letters that had appeared over your past birthdays.

With a soft sigh, you brushed Poe’s hand away in order to wrap your bandanna back around your leg and hide the other source of resentment for your birthday.

“It might not be him, you know. There aren’t enough letters to be-”

“But it is.” You shook your head interrupting Poe before he could finish his thoughts, a sharp bitterness in your tone. You were quick to soften though when you noticed the downward tilt of his lips. You hadn’t meant to direct your resentment towards him. He was just trying to help, after all. You were just frustrated at the cards fate had played you and the yearly reminder it brought. You were supposed to be counted lucky that you had two soulmates, but you didn’t see how anyone would think you were blessed. Ouf of the billions of souls in the universe, you had been given two people you could never be with. “I don’t know if it’s a soulmark thing or the bloody Force that tells me so, but it’s him. I’m certain of it.”

“Well, my offer still stands if you ever...you know...get a little lonely.” Poe’s eyebrows waggled as he gave you a knowing smirk. He may have not known about the other name etching itself on your body, only General Organa-er Leia as she had repeatedly told you to call her-knew about that one, but he was one of a very few select people who knew about the one you kept hidden with your trusted bandana and often jokingly offered - at least you were pretty certain it was a joke because lately, you had been more unsure - for the two of you to get together until he found his own soulmate, whoever the poor soul might be.

“Oh, keep dreaming, Dameron.” You tried to throw Poe a cutting glare as you promptly kicked him in the side, but you could only keep your smile at bay for a few seconds before it snuck its way through. He might have driven you crazy at times, but he always knew the right thing to do or say when you started slipping back into one of your darker, reclusive moods. No matter how alone you felt at times, Poe was always there to remind you he was there for you.

“Is there a reason you're here, or did you just feel like pestering me again?” You then asked after kicking him once more for the snide comment he muttered about your smile. “Unlike you apparently, I have work to get done, you know?” 

“Your ‘work’ will have to wait,” Poe answered. “General Organa’s assigned us another mission and while she wished it could have waited until after your birthday - which reminds me that she says happy birthday, by the way - we can’t afford to push it back. We need to leave as soon as you’re ready to.” 

“What’s the job?” You ask, your curiosity piqued at the way Poe seemed to straighten back up as he remembered why he came to find you in the first place. It had been a few weeks since you had last been able to leave the Resistance base and you were just itching to get away. It would also serve as a very welcomed distraction.

“A piece of the map’s been located.”

“Are you serious?” Your whole body froze and your earlier excitement suddenly faltered at his words. So much for that distraction. “This isn’t a joke, right? Because if it is, I swear Poe-” 

Poe shook his head interrupting you before you got yourself too worked up. “The General received a message from an old acquaintance on Jakku. We’ve got to go pick it up before the First Order also catches wind of its location and beats us to it.” 

“So, it’s finally happening.” You muttered softly more to yourself than in response to Poe as the weight of what this mission meant began to sink in. “I mean, I always thought we’d be able to, but still...” You shook your head in disbelief. “To think that we might be able to find him after everything that happened.” 

“Are you going to be okay?” Poe asked when your words trailed off and laid a hand tentatively on your shoulder. “You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to. The general would understand, especially with your history...”

“No, no, I’m good,” you replied as you jumped down from the table, suddenly restless and eager to move as a million thoughts started flowing through your brain. “Can’t have you going off on your own, anyways. God knows how much trouble you’d get in without me.” You attempted to throw Poe a smile but the way his brows softened made you realize that he could see right through it. “Trust me, Poe, I’ll be fine.” You cupped one of Poe’s cheeks briefly with your hand as you spoke, in an attempt to reassure him as much as yourself.

You gave him another smile, this one just a bit less pitiful than the first one, before patting his cheek gently and running off to your room to get dressed and ready for the mission before he could argue any further on the matter and before you could talk yourself out of it.

~~~ 

The surface of Jakku was quiet as you and Poe quietly made your way to your destination. The only sounds to be heard were the distant rumblings of the village’s animals and a stray windchime tinkling in the wind. 

Despite the peaceful setting, you couldn’t help but feel on edge as you strayed close behind Poe, your hand hovering over the blaster attached to your belt as your eyes scanned the scene around you. It couldn’t be this easy. After years of searching for Skywalker and the map to lead you to him, it couldn’t be as simple as flying into the village and walking out with the map as this.

But there wasn’t another ship in the night sky and all was at peace on the surface below. You couldn’t make out another soul outside beside you and Poe and even the animals were calm in the pens. 

Upon finding the house of the man you were here to meet, Poe knocked quietly, his dark eyes studying the desert around you as you waited. A few seconds later, a hand pushed aside the curtain and motioned you in. You followed the commands quickly, eager to get out of plain sight and slipped inside the lighted hut while BB-8, Poe’s loyal droid, stayed outside to keep watch.

“Lor San Tekka?” Poe asked as the braided curtains came to a close behind you and the two of you got your first good look at him.

While he was along in age, his face was also wizened in a way which showed he had seen and been through much in his long lifetime. His hair, a bright white, was a stark contrast to his tanned skin, but it was his eyes which caught your attention the most. You could see a sadness in them, a deep mourning for some loss and a startling reflection of your own.

San Tekka nodded his head, moving to sit in one of the empty chairs while motioning for you and Poe to do the same. Once you were all seated, he reached inside his robe and brought out a small, leather sack. 

“This will begin to make things right,” He spoke softly, placing the sack in Poe’s hand and closing it. “I’ve traveled too far, and seen too much, to ignore the despair in the galaxy. Without the Jedi, there can be no balance in the Force.”

His eyes turned to you as he spoke about the lost order, somber eyes staring deep into your own with an understanding that startled you.

He knew. 

Somehow he knew, but you didn’t understand how.

“I can’t.” You shook your head furiously, panic rising in your voice as your hands clenched and unclenched in your lap. “I’m sorry, I just can’t, not after what happened.”

A sad smile filled his features as he reached to take your hands in his and calm their restless movements. 

“Try as you might, young Rhodair, you cannot forgo your destiny. The Force will always be a part of who you are and who you will become.”

You opened your mouth to argue his statement. The Force may always be a part of you, but you would be damned if you ever continued your Jedi training. The order may have been good, but it had only brought you trouble and grief. You would never be a Jedi now, not after everything that had happened. 

But before you could explain any of this, BB-8 interrupted, frantically beeping about an unknown fleet of ships entering the atmosphere as he rolled into the hut.

“We’ve got company.” 

You exchanged a nervous look with Poe, your old thoughts fading away as the growing predicament took priority. Although none of you dared to speak, you all knew whose ships were on their way. It was only a matter of time before the First Order had caught wind of the same tip you had and made their way here. You were just lucky you had managed to be a few minutes earlier.

Your hands slip out of San Tekka’s grip as you swiftly follow Poe out of the hut, a new fear rising up deep within you. You were no stranger to fights with the First Order, but you had never experienced one when you were so disadvantaged. It didn’t matter that you had the best pilot in the Resistance fleet with you, the two of you could never stand alone against an entire fleet of First Order soldiers.

Several of the other villagers were beginning to become aware of the coming ships when you made your way back into the open air. Growing shouts of surprise and warning were heard throughout the village around you. The previously quiet animals grew restless and filled the air with anxious squawking and braying. 

Poe took out his quadnoculars and began scanning the horizon to your east, his dark brows furrowing at what he saw. You couldn’t see what was coming in the dim light, but knew it couldn’t have been good based on his reaction.

“You have to hide.” Poe turned to San Tekka, his face twisted in concern as he handed the quadnoculars to you.

You felt your heart speed up as you saw the number of ships coming your way. There were at least a dozen that you could see at the moment and you didn’t doubt each ship itself held a dozen or two of stormtroopers with them. There would be at least a hundred stormtroopers in the village in a matter of seconds and all you had were yourself, Poe, BB-8, and a few scraggly villages. It was going to be a massacre unless you could think of something fast.

“And you have to go!” San Tekka responded leaving your stomach twisting as you spun around to face him startled at his words. You couldn’t leave them at a time like this. It would be impossible for this small village to be able to hold its own against the trained soldiers of the First Order and would no doubt be slaughtered when they found what they were searching for was no longer here. “Go! You must return the balance!” San Tekka added, pushing you and Poe in the direction of your ships when neither of you made a move to do what he had said. “I’ve done all that I can do. Our hope rests in you now!”

You didn’t want to leave the man but saw little choice. While the thought tore you up inside, you couldn’t sacrifice your help for the map. If you stayed and the First Order got their hands on it, then what hope was left for the Resistance and those who still believed in it? As awful as the thought settled in your stomach, the village had to be sacrificed for the good of the universe.

Exchanging a knowing look with Poe, the two of you took off in the direction of your ships. 

The quiet village quickly erupted into the chaos of a battlefield around you as the stormtrooper transports landed. Sounds of blasters filled the air as the little village tried their best to fend off the elite soldiers of the First Order, but dying screams were quick to follow as the shots hit their mark. 

You did your best to ignore them as you tore after Poe towards your fighters. In the back of your mind, you knew the First Order would be here even if you weren’t but you couldn’t help but feel guilty about their presence nonetheless. This village was innocent, it’s only crime housing a piece of Luke Skywalker’s map and they were paying with their lives.

Shaking your thoughts away, you scrambled inside your fighter. You needed to stay focused on the mission, on the importance of the map Poe had in his jacket. That was all that mattered at this moment. It held the only hope the universe had at this point.

Your fingers flitted over the buttons and screens in front of you, hurridly trying to bring the ship around you to life. But just as you felt the familiar rumble of the engines starting beneath you, you were jarred forward as it was hit. Glancing behind you, you found a few wandering stormtroopers.

“Shit!” You mumbled as your fighter was hit once more causing the engines to sputter a few more times before coming to a stop. 

Casting another glance at the approaching enemy, you saw them fall when Poe quickly took care of them, but his own fighter was starting to catch fire. You grumbled a few more curses as you clambered back out of your ship to assess the state of your X-Wings. You had just fixed his ship and now it was probably going to be scrapped or lost completely.

Your cursing only grew as you took in the state of your own. It would take hours for you to at least be able to get it back in working order, precious time you didn’t have at the moment. As your frustration grew, you gave your shot X-Wing a swift kick. You didn’t think this day could get any worse.

“You take this. It’s safer with you than it is with me.” You spun around thinking Poe was talking to you, but his attention was towards BB-8 as he offered the small robot the map. “It’s safer with you than it is with either of us.” 

BB-8 was quick to disagree but upon Poe’s determination it still begrudgingly took the map and locked it away. 

“Go on, BB-8, we’ll be fine.” You encouraged the bot when it looked to you despite Poe’s urges for it to leave. 

You didn’t like the idea of parting ways with BB-8, or the map for that matter, but knew it was your best bet at this point. With both of your ships completely shot at the moment, you would have to stay hidden to not only stay alive but escape capture as well. But upon glancing back at the battlefield, you felt your luck already beginning to run out. Your ships weren’t hidden and it wouldn’t be hard for the First Order to realize Resistance members were still on Jakku with the map. With that knowledge, you knew they would sweep the planet and kill anyone in their way until they found you. What BB-8 now held was that important to them and to you. Just as the villagers’ sacrifice was important, so would be your own.

“Don’t worry buddy, we’ll find you when this blows over.” You gave the small robot a reassuring pat on the head, hoping it was unable to see the worried state you were in. Glancing between the two of you once more, BB-8 let out a series of nervous beeps before taking off into the desert.

With the fighting starting to quiet down, you swiftly made your way to a nearby patch of grass to hide and watch the scene unfolding before you. The remaining villagers had started to surrender upon realizing their ultimate defeat and were being rounded up by gunpoint towards the center of the village. You found San Tekka among the survivors and shuddered at the slaughter that would undoubtedly take place among the First Order realizing they were moments too late.

The stormtroopers seemed to be waiting for something as they finished up rounding the villagers, though you were unsure as to what it might have been. It didn’t take long for your curiosity to be sated when another ship landed amongst the others, but you shuddered upon looking at it. This one was different. With the imposing vertical wingspan, you knew it belonged to someone of importance.

Deep down you knew who was aboard that ship before you saw them walk out, knew that it was only a matter of time before you were forced to face him again, but the reaction upon seeing his dark figure striding out was still inevitable.

Your entire body froze, a soft gasp escaping your throat as your eyes locked onto him. Visions of that night flashed before you once more, aided by the heavy smell of smoke and fire around you. 

Everything you had tried so hard to bury away came rushing back with a sudden ferocity you nearly cried out, only barely able to stop yourself with a quick hand to your mouth. You could hear his voice as he had begged you to join him, feel his hands as they had caressed your face, and then see his face through your tears as you had broken both of your hearts with just a few words.

“Sol?” You could barely hear Poe’s soft cry over the roaring in your head. “Sol? What’s wrong?”

Poe’s gentle hand against your cheek startled you causing you to nearly cry out again, but caught yourself just in time as you recognized the man beside you as only your partner.

“...I’m fine,” you managed to mumble out, breath heavy as you struggled to relax. “Just give me a minute.”

“You’re crying.” 

It was a simple statement and you saw his face soften dramatically despite the situation around you. You reached up, shocked to see Poe was right as you felt the wetness on your cheeks. You had been crying.

“I’m fine,” you mumbled out again, desperately wiping at the tears and hating the weakened state it put you in.

It didn’t matter that he was here, that you had to face him again after so many years. All that mattered was BB-8 getting the map to safety and you not getting caught. You couldn’t freak out now, couldn’t lose control of your emotions now when yours and Poe’s lives depended on it. You needed to straighten yourself up, but one quick glance in his direction and you were back in the past again.

Poe opened his mouth to debate the matter. He may have not known what was going through your head and upsetting you so much, but he did know it must have been significant because you always had such a tight lock on your emotions. 

He never got to voice his concern. Upon seeing your startled reaction to the scene unfolding before you, he quickly pushed aside his concern and turned just in time to see the dark figure from before cut down Lor San Tekka. And before he or yourself could stop him, his hand was at his blaster as he tried to kill the dark figure who had just slaughtered San Tekka.

A hand immediately stifled your mouth as you watched Poe’s idiotic move in horror, able to do nothing about it without exposing yourself and making the situation worse. Poe’s blaster shot only made it halfway to its target before it and Poe were frozen. 

Poe struggled against the invisible bonds of the force, clearly shocked at the display of power. You tried not to be too angry at him, he was ignorant to the power of the force, but you still couldn’t believe he thought he could take down the dark figure with a surprise shot. 

Your thoughts began to scramble at Poe’s capture, the only coherent thought was about how much of an idiot he was. You knew you needed to do something, anything to start formulating a plan on rescuing Poe without your capture as well, but your eyes kept falling onto the dark figure before you and all ability to focus and think fell apart. You were completely helpless.

It wasn’t until you saw them dragging Poe away that the weight of the situation began to kick your brain into overdrive. If you didn’t do something now, you would lose Poe. But what? What could you manage to do against a troop of First Order soldiers and the man from your past?

But before you could worry too much, you noticed the stormtrooper approaching him from the side and then the sharp point in the direction of where your ships were at. Someone else had found them and now they knew Poe wasn’t the only Resistance fighter on the planet.

You slinked further into the shadows when both men suddenly turned in your direction. And then Poe, noticing this exchange and the men heading in your direction, started struggling against his captors causing you to curse the man once again. 

The troops picked up their pace when your location was verified by Poe’s actions and you swiftly took your blaster in your hands. You weren’t going down without a fight, you weren’t going to be forced to face him again without a fight.

But despite your determination, you only got off a few rounds before the blaster was knocked from your hands and you were forced to your knees. You struggled against your captors, cursing and kicking as you were dragged out of your hiding spot and into his view. 

You told yourself not to look, to not give him the satisfaction of seeing your face, of knowing it was you, but you couldn’t do it. You could feel his eyes on you, almost hear the soft intake of his breath at the shock of your presence after all these years.

You looked up at him from the distance and felt the sharp tug at your chest from the mark which laid there. His eyes caught yours quickly and despite the mask which kept his face from you, you could still see and feel the reaction your sudden presence pulled. 

Once again, you felt the sharp tug at your chest, a cruel reminder of just who this man before you was before you felt the biting sting of the butt of a gun against the back of your head and everything went black.

~~~

part two  |  part three

#star wars #kylo ren #ben solo #armitage hux #kylo ren x reader #armitage hux x reader #soulmate #au #reader #the force awakens #romance

[managician]

ARC V Anniversary Day 4

Discussion prompt:  Who’s your favorite character(s)?

Hoo boy, I ended up making a top 10 because there’s so many lovable characters in this cast and I want to talk about them all... Warning for incredibly long descriptions as the top goes on (I’m sorry for mobile users)

10. Reira Akaba

Look at this precious bab. Right off the bat I knew I would like them — I have a kind of weakness for child characters (Rua is one of my faves from 5DS too for a reason), but I never actually expected to love them as much as I do right now. Seeing this little afraid kid with no sense of self grow into a person of their own and playing a literal key role in the resolution of the final conflict was so satisfying. 

09. Ray Akaba

Aand naturally, with me loving Reira it probably comes off as no surprise that I love Ray too. Even with the extremely limited screentime, she shot through the roof as one of my favorites. She was no goddess or super powerful entity that had the equal means to fight Zarc, but she did so anyway. And she won. She’s the porter of an incredibly inspiring message and pretty much symbolizes the core of ARC V’s narrative; she saw trouble and she knew cowering in fear would solve nothing, so she took a step forward with courage and believed in her own worth. POINT IS, Ray is awesome.

08. Rin 

Ahh, Rin... It’s one of the few cases where it’s hard for me to articulate what I like about her the most. I actually wasn’t super invested in her when I first finished watching the show, but one of my friends really likes Yugo and Rin and that got me to think more about her beyond her lack of screentime, and I found myself suddenly appreciating her a lot. She has all her pragmatic yet caring personality and goals scattered throughout the show if you pay attention to her interactions with Yugo, and you can actually get a extremely solid grasp on the kind of the person she is — even her deck plays into it (a logical and ruthless Burn Damage deck, which showcases she’s not here for anyone’s bullshit). 

07. Shun Kurosaki

Shun is a fairly biased case for me, I’ll totally admit. I didn’t actually like him that much during my watch of the show though, and it wasn’t until the XYZ/Fusion Arc that I looked at the events of ARC V in retrospective and realised how much Shun had been involved in. I’m a sucker for stoic and ruthless characters learning to trust people again, and Shun fit into the mold perfectly. And he definitely did strike me as cool from the first go, with Rise Falcon’s insane OTK against the LDS Trio back in Standard, so even if I wasn’t actively rooting for his character I wanted to see what direction he’d take. Seeing him grow and finally make peace with the Yuto/Ruri situation at the end of the show made me incredibly happy; I think that he could finally start leaving all the bitterness and pain behind and begin a new journey of hope with his comrades. 

06. Serena

Another case of me being somewhat (okay, really) gay and biased for girls. I loved Serena right from the first go; her pushy and pretty aggressive personality caught my interest, and we got a glimpse of her backstory with Reiji pretty soon after her introduction, which made me feel connected with her very easily. Yet another misguided Academia student — though her arc is completely different compared to say, Sora’s or Dennis’s. She had even less information about the outside world than the rest of the Fusion gang did, and so of course the key for her was learning the truth. Thanks to Yuzu and Shun she was able to check by herself how horrorific her Academia comrades’s actions had been, and she immediately decides to fight against the injustice. There’s something admirable about her relentless courage and will to do what’s right, and she never stops being herself and fighting like she wants to the very bitter end. Pretty inspiring for me, honestly.

05. Reiji Akaba

And we enter Top 5, starting off with Reiji, who is frankly the trickiest character for me on this list. Unlike many people I know I didn’t ever think of him as an evil or dettached rival, because of... His scarf. Yes, his stupid gravity defying-scarf. Red symbolizes heroism in many Japanese shows, so I had the hunch that Reiji would end up acting nicer than he did at the beginning of show. And boy, did he. He’s an incredibly compelling and well-rounded character who is a clear contrast to Yuya’s bright entertainment, and he expresses his emotions in a very subtle way. He’s an unexpected rival who subverts tropes left and right, just like the protagonist; and while it’s clearly a case of the “I Had To Grow Up Too Early” trope, it’s executed so brilliantly well that you can’t help feel sorry for him, even if you don’t particularly like him. ...Which was actually what happened to me, I barely cared for him in my first watch of the show... And then I loved him and suddenly he was in my top favorites. He’s so great.

04. Sawatari Shingo

I’ll say it right from the go, I didn’t ever think a character of Shingo’s type could get me so interested. From the beginning of the show I saw him as Yuya’s ‘rival’ in a purer sense of the word than Reiji; they’re both Entertainment Duelists and have a more direct confrontation in the championship’s Action Duel. But that’s all he really was to me, another showcasing of Entertainment and a fun character to see when he was on screen, nothing else. And yet I found myself taking a deep liking to him when he finally tried to steer his own path; despite being a loud, kind-of comedy relief character if the situation requires for it (somewhat akin to Jounouchi in DM, perhaps), at the same time he’s a quite talented Duelist who enjoys pulling a crowd’s attention towards him. He wants to impress people and that’s something I could relate to in a very intimate way, as much as I preferred Yuya’s ideology. And he grew so much during the BB Arc with Crow too, it was so cute.

Tied for 3rd spot - Yuto and Yuzu Hiragi

Aka... I tried really, really hard to pick one... But I had to give up. Sometimes I say Yuto’s 3rd and Yuzu 2nd and some other days it’s the other way around, and then sometimes I straight up can’t decide. Like today. 

I wasn’t big on Yuto at first at all. He did intrigue me, especially because thanks to him we were introduced to the same-face plot that set off the whole Standard arc in the first place, though that was it. I thought he was cool, a character you can appreciate if he comes up with screen, but don’t actively think of outside of that. Broodingly dark characters tend to piss me off unless they quickly grow on me, which probably added to me not feeling very interested in either him or Shun at the beginning of the show; even with that, I appreciated his rather calm and pacifist nature in comparison to his partner... 

And then Episode 37 happened and I was completely thrown off the charts. His desire to bring smiles to people and to not hurt anyone anymore to the point of refusing to attack Yugo pulled at my heartstrings, and I’m a complete sucker for self-sacrificing characters, so when he protected Yuya at the expense of his own soul and entrusted that desire onto him... I was sold. His influence is rather subtle but shows passionately many times, and I found myself falling in love with his character despite the lack of screentime and dubious characterisation that every XYZ character suffers from; I think he’s the best one out of the trio in that matter, though. And his interactions with Yuzu, Ruri and Yuya are so sweet; overall he’s just a character I can find myself easily toying with and I love his role in the show.

What can I say about Yuzu? She’s my favorite female lead from all YGO series. I found her rather annoying but cute during the first... Ten or so episodes. And then I fell in love with her because holy damn, she’s such an amazing character. She actually Duels, has a beautiful and kickass deck and is deeply involved in the plot from start to end (which is already more than can be said for the other shows), not to mention she’s such an inspiring role model. Yuzu always actively worked to improve herself and it’s refreshing to see her be so open with her feelings and caring for people. She’s so strong and I really enjoyed all the bonds she had with the rest of the cast — when you had half of them going through hell and back to help her, it felt legitimately heartwarming and believable, because she always does her best to forge a connection with people and isn’t afraid to say what she thinks.

She felt like one of the most human characters in the show for me, as her best strength was the power of encouraging and inspiring other people (Yuya, Serena, Yugo just to name a few) rather than being unbeatable or not being allowed to fail. She’s everything and more I could hope from a female lead and she inspires me everyday.

01. Yuya Sakaki

*falls to the ground and sobs*

I can’t even begin to describe how much I love this precious ball of sunshine. Anime protagonists are always without fail a 50/50 chance for me, I either love them with all my soul or I hate them and I’m 200% more invested in other characters. Yuya (un)surprisingly fell into the first category from the very first episode, he’s so adorable and seeing him go on a journey to leave behind his years of bullying and depression and turn into someone he can be proud of is hands down the most inspiring thing in this series. 

He genuinely makes me so happy and his character development is the very thing that made me invested in ARC V in the first place, I will never get enough of what an amazing and compelling protagonist he is. His attitude of trying to stay happy and make the people around him happy as well, but ultimately falling victim to his own emotions and crashing hard against reality is so brutally and openly real that my heart aches just from thinking of it. I’ve learned with him as I watched the show; as an audience we experienced the same happiness, sadness and pain that he went through, and I’m so proud of him for getting so far and never giving up despite all the odds always being against him.

He’ll always hold a special place in my heart, he’s so important to me and I’m just really glad he exists! 

#arcvanniversary #ygo arc v #yugioh arc v #arc v #long post #i did not mean for this to turn into a essay but once i start talking about this cast i can't stop for a solid 20 minutes so

[gossamie]

before i forget you.

SUMMARY — He wakes you up to ask you for one last thing— before he loses everything.

PAIRING — jeon jungkook x reader

GENRE — angst

WORD COUNT — 1,392

WARNINGS — mentions of disease/trauma

NOTES — WOW i haven’t written in a hot minute!! i’m finally on thanksgiving break, which means i have way more time to write. i apologize for my inactivity and i hope this makes up for my absence :’) enjoy!

p.s. thank you to mia (aka @taenchanted) for giving this story a beta read! thankful for you bb!

“Love is so short, forgetting is so long.” - Pablo Neruda

When he looks at you, you know that he has forgotten everything.

You can tell from the emptiness in Jungkook’s eyes and how it creates an abyss of endless depths, darker than the pitch black that envelops your small bedroom. At this point, you don’t even need to see him; this has happened too many times before, so often that you’ve gotten used to seeing him forget. That look has been ingrained into your memory and etched into your soul and carved into your heart but you are numb to the pain, and you have been for a long time.

You are numb to the pain because, since the accident, Jungkook has forgotten every single memory regarding your relationship— every kiss, every smile, every “I miss you” and every “I’ll see you soon”— and you’ve found that you spend far less nights crying yourself to sleep when you push down the tears and ignore the heartache.

There are only two things that Jungkook remembers: the fact that you exist and the fact that he loves you.

What hurts the most is not the fact that he doesn’t remember you entirely, but the fact that he does not remember himself entirely. For Jungkook, every day is a struggle to remember how he likes his eggs in the morning, how he likes to style his hair, how he likes to put together an outfit; every day is a struggle to remember how to be him. Whenever you see him, he looks lost within himself, as if he is merely a shadow of the Jungkook you once loved.

Your worst fear has always been losing Jungkook.

You never knew that you would lose him like this.

As Jungkook’s empty gaze stays locked on yours, you notice that there is something different, something unusual tainting the darkness in his eyes. Its presence is like the moon; it does not resemble the warm rays of the sun, but its light pierces through the abyss and strikes the scars in your heart and tears you apart until you are left open, vulnerable, completely under its control.

It is fear.

You can’t remember the last time Jungkook has shown any emotion since the accident and you have no idea how to react. Questions begin to race through your mind. You want to ask, Have you realized that you’ve forgotten everything that’s happened yesterday? Have you realized that you’ve forgotten every single day before that? Have you realized that you’ve forgotten everything about us?

Have you realized that you’ve forgotten what it feels like to love me?

Instead, you ask, “What’s wrong?”

Jungkook blinks. The pain doesn’t leave his eyes. “I almost forgot you.”

You do not respond. You wish that sentence never came out of his mouth.

He stays silent for a moment, as if to register those four words in his brain. Then, “Can I ask you to do something for me?”

“Of course.” I’d do anything for you.

“Take me far, far away from here. I need new memories. I need something I want to remember.”

You do not hesitate to accept Jungkook’s request because you’d do anything for him, so you and Jungkook put on your shoes, leave your small apartment, and drive. You drive past all the bright lights illuminating the cities and all the hills dotting the countryside and everything in between until you reach the topmost cliff bordering the very edge of the Yellow Sea.

The sun is beginning to rise when you arrive. The lines between the sky and the sea are nebulous, blending together into a blur of blush, marigold, and cerulean. From your vantage point, the ocean stretches into infinity and molds itself to the skies. Long shoots of grass bend and sway in the summer breeze, bowing to the majesty of the scene before them. You do not risk blinking, for you want to bask in the beauty of the universe’s creation for as long as possible.

You ignore the fact that Jungkook will not remember this tomorrow night.

You dare a glance towards Jungkook. His eyelids are closed, fluttering ever so slightly as the wind floats through the car’s open window. There is a slow, rhythmic rise and fall in his chest as he breathes in, breathes out in time with the beat of your heart. You are transfixed by what you see because, for the first time, he looks like at peace; for the first time, he looks like he has found himself, no longer drifting in the vacuum of his mind.

For the first time, Jungkook looks real.

When he opens his eyes, though, he fades as quickly as he appears.

He shifts his head towards you. His lips open and close, his mind struggling to piece together words from thoughts. Finally, he asks, “What’s your favorite memory of us?”

“There’s too many to choose from,” you reply.

“Well, if you had to pick one, which one would it be?”

You pause for a moment, sifting through the memories you have accumulated for the past two years of your relationship with Jungkook. After being wrapped in your thoughts, you say, “Our first kiss.”

“Why?”

“Everything about that moment was perfect. For those eleven seconds, it was just you and me and the stars. It seemed like the moon was watching us and the stars were shining brighter for us and everything was so beautiful and it was all I ever wanted that moment to be.” You finish your sentence, breathless. You don’t think you’ve ever spoken with such complete and utter honesty before.

Jungkook remains quiet for some time. The silence that stretches between you and him in those few seconds is endless.

Then, “Why can’t I remember that?”

He looks at you, and you can see the fear warping those beautiful brown eyes of his in striking detail. “If that memory was so important to you,” he continues, “then it must have been important to me. I want to remember that, Y/N. I want to remember that so badly.”

“You know I don’t expect you to remember anything.”

“No, you don’t understand,” Jungkook replies, shaking his head. “I’m not going to remember this tomorrow, and that scares me. It scares me that I don’t remember that or us or me or you. When I woke up this morning and I almost didn’t recognize you, I was so, so scared.

“Y/N, I— I’m falling. I’m falling through this void and I’ve been falling every day for the past year. I need something to hold onto, only if it’s for a moment.”

Then, he kisses you.

The tips of his fingers trace your jawline with the touch of a wilting flower and the short locks of his hair brushes against your forehead with the fragility of a dying sun but his kiss is filled with hunger, burning with such ferocity it makes your fingernails dig into the fabric of his shirt. You keep yourself locked in this moment, focused on the way his lips move against yours, on the way the sun’s newborn rays illuminate the gold underneath his skin. This moment is fleeting, temporary, but for Jungkook, it is everything.

But even now, as he holds you in a secure embrace, you can feel that Jungkook’s not really there. You know that his mind is already slipping away from him, scratching itself out until it is nothing more than a blank page. You will be the only thing that remains of this moment, the only proof that these past few hours even occurred. By tomorrow night, this memory will be gone; by tomorrow night, Jungkook will have lost everything.

You pull away from his kiss, and you begin to cry.

You are crying because you lost all hope when it disappeared with Jungkook’s memories. You are crying because, though you can feel his heart beating from where your cheek is pressed against his chest, Jungkook is gone and you will never find him again. You are crying because you and Jungkook’s story will never be complete, for there cannot be an ending if the beginning is always being erased. This is all you will remember of this day: the kiss, the tears, and the emptiness that will forever divide your love.

When the sun sets, you and Jungkook are forced to begin again.

#btsguild #kpopwritingnet #bts fic #bts au #bts angst #jungkook fic #jungkook au #jungkook angst #writing this made me so SAD #but i hope you enjoyed! #love you all #<3

[vera-invenire]

VnC Liveblog - Chapter 4

.All chapter liveblogs are linked HERE.

The Case Study of Vanitas, aka, It’s Probably A Really Bad Idea To Get Into  Fights With People Called ‘Hellfire Witch’, Boys, I’m Just Saying

Not much to note in the cover art this time -- we’ve got Vanitas’ standard imagery in blues and blacks, with emphasis on the hourglass earring and his eyes. And the gears, through after the airship we haven’t really had much else that was very steampunk-ish in the story. Maybe that’ll change in later chapters.

Re: the eyes -- we know that most vampires have eyes that glow red when they drink or use their powers (I think that’s how it works?) and they have a link to the crimson moon, but Vanitas is human, so even though he’s got a connection to the Vampire of the Blue Moon, his blue eyes might just be a coincidence. (re: for the  a e s t h e t i c) (though the color matching with that hourglass is a bit suspect on the symbolic level, so who knows)

We get a bit of a peak at the dynamics in Dante’s crew before we jump back into the action --

Johann is very camp. I wonder if the matching suits were his idea. I like his relationship with Dante, though. Riche seems to be their junior member -- at least Johann is looking out for her.

Uh-oh. Luca’s heading back into the fray.

Chapter title: Memoire 4 Love Femme Fatale

Well, ‘femme fatale’ is Jeanne, that’s pretty clear. But ‘love’? Eh? Are we introducing a romance? Or is this the protective love between Jeanne and Luca?

So, Jeanne’s chasing Noé down the back-alleys of the -- was it the riverfront district? Warehouses, we’re surrounded by warehouses.

She catches his foot!

Noé intercepts! \o/

(’may i throw you back’, pfff)

But Vanitas is no slouch himself, even if he is back to being carried like a kitten.

We already knew that Vanitas was aware of Jeanne’s reputation, but this exchange makes me think he knows a bit more than surface level rumors. But he doesn’t seem up-to-date with the no-killing influence Luca has on her.

Vanitas tells Noé to follow the plan (which we are not privy to) as Jeanne finds them again.

'No’, ‘I refuse’, must be Noé‘s favorite words, he says them so much.

(Can you imagine baby Noé just constantly saying ‘i refuse. i refuse.’ all serious-like whenever someone tried to make him put down his blankie, cuz I’m imagining it, lmao.)

Note: Noé‘s teacher is a scary badass. (also what’s he holding? a cane? a switch?? oi, what was Noé‘s training like)

Meanwhile, Noé feels like he’s finally getting the upper-hand --

Uh-oh.

Pride goeth, etc etc

*sports announcer voice* That’s gotta hurt.

But why’s he looking at his hand? I didn’t notice him holding anything before.

“Now... let’s see.” He and Vanitas still have a plan to enact. Also, hi Riche!

So we haven’t had much time with these three yet, but I’m starting to get a feel for their priorities. Dante would never, ever in a million years admit to anything like fondness for Vanitas, or vice versa, but underneath all the mutual sniping I think there’s a small bond there. A teeny tiny one.

Whereas with Johann -- he honestly doesn’t care about Vanitas one way or another. If V were to be killed in front of them, I think Dante would be shocked and frozen for at least a second while Johann would say, ‘welp, it’s been a lark, toodle-loo’, grab his Two People, and get them all the hell out of there, not bothering to look back.

Riche, I don’t know enough about yet. She mostly registers to me as the rookie of this trio, tbh.

Yes, antagonize the massively powerful warrior who just threw Noé through a brick wall. That’s a good plan. (is this the plan, that would be a terrible plan)

Ooo, history, I love history. I especially love MochiJun’s history and how layered and batshit it can get once the reveals start to hit.

So the vampire-human war happened a long time ago -- how long ago, we don’t know. We know that BlueVampire!Vanitas was alive during that time. We know that Jeanne was alive during that time, but was then put asleep.

(Why? Some thoughts: she was a weapon of war and put away when peace came; she went off the rails and had to be subdued; her being put asleep was a condition of some kind; she wanted to be put under, etc. There’s no way to know what really happened yet, but it’s interesting to think about.)

We also now know that BlueVampire!Vanitas used to tell Vanitas stories about the war that clearly didn’t leave out many details. But that wording...honestly, it sounds like maybe Vanitas was a kid when he heard this? Telling stories is something you usually do with a kid, which might make sense because.human!Vanitas doesn’t look that old. Anything that happened more than a few years ago would slide into ‘kid’ territory.

Which makes me wonder...did BlueVampire!Vanitas raise human!Vanitas? Or teach him, at least? I’d be a neat parallel to Noé and his teacher.

(what if they’re the same person, bwahahaha)

Anyway, back to Vanitas taunting the highly aggravated weapon of mass destruction.

Oooo, he’s about to pull out a special move. And he -- dropped the book?

is that thing really there, or is it, like, symbolic

oh shi-

The gloves are literally about to come off...!

That kid’s got horrible timing.

Ohoho, someone woke up from their nap. Was this part of the plan or is it an interesting complication?

Ow.

...IT WAS A TRICK, you sly dog.

also vampires are monsters, huh? or just curse-bearers and bourreaus? i think this distinction may be a biiiiit important. (is this why you’re always so shocked when Noé does/says something decent, oh boy)

LMAO, oh god, I hope this Greek chorus follows Vanitas around all the time just to drag him, wouldn’t that be amazing

Damn, boy -- he really knows how to work the superior disdain, doesn’t he?

I’m still shaky on how these true names work. Do vampires just fall into types, and that’s what gets warped? You’d think something called a ‘true name’ would be more individual than that.

Oi, Jeanne, you aren’t watching? Though I like Dante being all, ‘whatever, I’ve seen this show before.’

ahahaha, OOPS.

That’s what happens when you let your grandstanding get away from you, bb.

oh hey, look who was lurking nearby and NOT HELPING AT ALL.

“...you must be joking.” in this kind of context is like, one of my favorite lines.

Also damn, Jeanne is a badass.

Yeah, saw that coming.

She really shouldn’t have let Vanitas see how distracted she became when Luca wandered into danger.

*snorts* The Greek chorus doesn’t lie.

It’s a bluff, though; no way would Noé agree to harming the kid.

oh my god.

(”don’t forget to cover his mouth as you would a hostage, like so” akfdsajkfhkjf)

Noé, you are too innocent, too pure.

And she folds like a house of cards.

I don’t think even Vanitas expected this plan to work so well.

Oh, a little bit of crazy eyes there. This is gonna be a Thing, isn’t it? Vanitas, who, as far as we know, owes his loyalty to nothing and no one uses this to kick Jeanne while she’s down.

Heh, wonder what’s gonna happen when Vanitas finds something he wants to protect.

That is definitely a plotting look in his eye. He just saw how to use this to his advantage.

1. um what

2. hey, is this the first time we’ve seen him bare handed? It’s nice to know he doesn’t have actual claws under those gloves.

3. speaking of which, is that ‘my strength is suddenly gone’ bit because there IS something magic-related about his hands, or is she just in shock?

4. that is a very unnerving look. Vanitas, what are you doing

...holy crap, whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat??

Vanitas what are you doing

Shit, this is why the chapter was called “Love Femme Fatale”, oh geez.

dante, why do you look the most freaked out out of everyone?

Alright, I know Vanitas has been set up as being utterly unscrupulous, what with the lying and taking a little boy as a hostage and using a bloodthirsty monster to do his dirty work, etc, but seriously, someone needs to introduce him to the tenants of the #metoo campaign. Sure, fine, she tried to kill him two minutes ago, but this feels like a line too far.

...

Yeah, this ain’t real. The disdain, the fear, the calculation from before -- that was genuine. This is another bluff.

And I think I know why he’s doing it. Fighting Jeanne made it very clear that she is waaaaay out of his league, strength-wise. He only won through guile, and it’s a trick that might not work again. This woman has a well-earned, blood-soaked reputation, and she was gonna walk away from this fight seeing Vanitas as an enemy to herself and Luca.

But Vanitas saw her weakness -- she lets her bonds with those she cares about distract her. She’s a killer, but she’s sentimental. Emotional.

So, if you’re Vanitas, how do you deal with this, knowing that Jeanne the Hellfire Witch might become a problem for you down the line? How do you plan to defeat a potential foe who is so much stronger than you, someone you could never hope to defeat in a fair fight?

Apparently, if you’re Vanitas, you try to seduce them.

Even if the actual seduction part doesn’t work, you can still mess with her head just enough to make her confused, maybe make her a little more likely to hesitate when it’s time for the gauntlet to finally come down.

And a split-second’s hesitation could be all Vanitas would need to make his counter.

(sidenote: i still think it’s  h i l a r i o u s  that Dante is the most outraged about all this kissing and love declaration stuff. Noé apparently can’t hear any of this at all, which I think is very convenient. We don’t get to see his reaction to this kind of game until later, apparently.)

Uh-oh. Looks like this kid is powerful and very, very pissed.

“A large-scale “formula” revision” mmhmm, okay, what’s that supposed to mean? Am I getting an explanation for the magic system yet?

Looks like it’s not just Luca keeping Jeanne from going off the rails -- she does the same for him.

Look at that. She’s throwing death threats but now she’s blushing, she sure as hell wouldn’t have been blushing before he kissed her, the stupid plan is working.

And honestly, aggravation and confusion are probably going to work better than actual tender feelings in this seduction. He’s going to play this role to the goddamn hilt.

Look at that face, the jerk.

Alright, that’s a better face.

Noé has no idea what he’s getting into, the poor soul.

(he didn’t have much of a presence in this chapter, did he. maybe Jeanne is mostly going to be a Vanitas subplot instead of a Vanitas-and-Noé subplot)

Apparently we’ve traded one killer on the streets for another. And even more intriguing -- he recognized this killer. ‘Course, now he’s dead, so I don’t know how useful that’s gonna be.

Whimsical creature of darkness! I did not miss you.

The true threat is revealed with a name -- “Charlatan”. But, you know --

(Charlatan: a person who falsely pretends to know or be something.)

-- which makes me think there’s proooobably something else behind this guy. He is a fake, after all. (Though, hey, ‘charlatan’ is a nice contrast with Vanitas the doctor, don’t you think.)

That’s all for chapter 4! What a night, eh?

Next, CHAPTER 5.

#vanitas no carte #the case study of vanitas #noe #vanitas #vanitas liveblog #someone needs to call vanitas a poseur please it's all i want

[senatorrorgana]

By Your Side - One

Summary: Nightmares of Kylo Ren still haunt Poe while he sleeps, but he's not the only one on the base who understands painful nightmares. He and Rey begin to bond while up in the middle of the night thanks to their nightmares, and the two find it more than helpful to share a bed - as friends of course. But the closer they grow to one another, the more their feelings begin to change as the two start to fall in love...

A/N: It's been about two weeks since I've written anything and I'm so glad to be getting back into it! I missed these little baby pilots while I was off on my birthday vacation. This was supposed to be a one-shot but it kind of evolved a little bit and I wanted to turn it into a falling in love kind of fic. This fic was also inspired by the prompt @idensversios !

Pairing: Damerey

AO3: (x)

   No matter how many times Poe went through this nightmare, it never changed. He still felt the searing pain that haunted him now months later, the involuntary feeling of someone ripping your mind apart, searching for what you were trying to hide. His muscles still ached when he woke with a start, covered in sweat and gasping for air that he felt had been crushed out of his lungs. He was safe, as he always was when he woke from these nightmares, still in his bed in his new quarters on the Resistances new base, the room completely dark save for the faint glow coming from BB-8’s charger in the corner where the little droid sat docked in sleep mode. Poe threw his legs off the side of the bed, sitting upright and refusing to turn the light on, knowing it would only stir his little droid companion.

   He was safe, the Resistance was safe - for now - and Kylo Ren couldn’t reach him or anyone on this base. Poe had to remind himself that he’d been through worse, he’d nearly died in fights up in his X-Wing, he’d been shot and lost so much blood he nearly passed out, he’d been through worse predicaments, but nothing haunted him more than the scars Kylo Ren left on his mind. All of the physical scars on his body couldn’t compare to the one searing one in his mind.

   He quietly got out of bed, grabbing his pants off the floor and pulling them on before grabbing a nearby shirt and his jacket and tugging his boots on quickly before he left the room. The base was quiet this time of night, only one or two people up on guard, making sure nothing could sneak up on the Resistance again after all they’d been through and all they had lost. Poe settled himself in the middle of the quiet meeting room, sitting down at the table and grabbing a nearby datapad. If he was going to be up for a while, he might as well be useful and help with doing some inventory, counting up all they had and what they needed. He was probably there for a good hour or so before he heard someone try to quietly walk up behind him.

   “I didn’t think I’d see you up.”

   Poe turned around to see Rey standing before him now, seemingly having just woken up herself as she stifled a yawn and stretched slightly.

   “I could say the same for you,” Poe replied, a slight smirk playing on his lips now.

   He’d only formally met Rey a few weeks ago, the two bonding and becoming closer ever since they settled into their new home. Poe understood why Finn had become such close friends with Rey, she was strong beyond a doubt, but she was also kind and had this fierceness about her that Poe found himself drawn to.

   “Bad dream,” Rey said, taking a seat beside him. “What about you?”

   “Same here,” Poe said, not wanting to go into detail, though Rey seemed to feel the same.

   “So what does someone who can’t sleep do around a quiet base?” Rey asked.

   “Well, I figured I would make myself useful, I’ve been doing inventory,” Poe sighed.

   “Need any help?” Rey asked.

   In all honesty, Poe was beginning to feel a bit tired again, though he was scared to go back to sleep - on the nights he had these nightmares they never went away and only came right back. It was beginning to be difficult to keep the numbers straight and a second pair of eyes couldn’t hurt.

   “If you feel up for it,” Poe said, moving the data pad over between the two of them.

   Rey leaned in close, listening to his every word on how to keep track of the inventory before she started helping him out. They were at it for hours until the sun was just barely starting to creep in through the few windows on the base.

   “Rey, I think -”

   Poe stopped himself short when he noticed Rey fast asleep, leaning against him and her head rested on his shoulder. She looked so peaceful that he couldn’t help but smile, trying to stay still so he wouldn’t disturb her. As much as he would have liked to let her sleep, he knew he had to wake her so they could move with the base beginning to come back to life.

   “Rey,” Poe said, gently wrapping his arm around her and shaking her a bit.

   Her hazel eyes slowly opened, scanning her surroundings before nuzzling closer to Poe, groaning in protest and trying to shut her eyes again.

   “Rey, it's morning,” Poe laughed.

   “To people who actually slept this morning,” Rey grumbled.

   “Someone isn't a morning person,” Poe said.

   “Wake me up later,” Rey said, making herself even more comfortable.

   “How about I get you to bed at least? As much as I'd love to be your personal pillow, I think we'd get in the way out here,” Poe said.

   “Fine,” Rey said with a sigh, sitting upright again and stretching, “Lead the way, Commander.”

   “You can sleep in my bed, it's not far from here and someone might as well use it,” Poe said.

   “Are you sure? I can just sleep on the Falcon,” Rey said, her mood shifting to slightly nervous.

    “It's fine, I'll be out here anyway, you'll have the room to yourself and I'm sure Beebee-Ate won't mind having you as a roommate,” Poe offered up a slight smile to try and ease her nerves, sensing the tension radiating off of her.

    “Alright, but only because I'm exhausted,” Rey said, “and I've heard that the commanding officers got bigger beds.”

    “Not much bigger but a little bit,” Poe said.

    “I knew it,” Rey grinned.

   Whether it was a lack of sleep or Poe just genuinely enjoying Rey's company, it was easy to forget the nightmares that plagued him with her around.

   Being up at night with Poe had become a routine for Rey. Every night she woke up for the past week with the same nightmares that plagued her, though sometimes she could swear she felt Poe's nightmares bleeding into her own. But she'd wake up and find him around the base, either working on his X-Wing, doing inventory, or simply put on the tarmac stargazing, and they'd spend hours talking about anything that came to mind. She'd come to the decision that she liked Poe, he was funny and kind, but he also listened and remembered all she told him, which was more than anyone had ever done for her all her life.

   She'd also spent a few nights in his bed, accidentally of course. He'd send her to go to sleep in his room and when she'd wake up he'd be beside her, turned over on his side facing the wall and sound asleep, she didn't want to admit that she slept better when he did that. But tonight they were out by a river close to the base, covered by the dense trees and only starlight peeking through and reflecting off the river, Poe having a small fire going to keep them warm while they talked. He even offered up his jacket to keep her warm, the heavy leather keeping her from shivering and carrying the faint scent of engine oil that just reminded her of Poe.

   “When did you learn how to fly?” Rey asked curiously, her eyes locked on the stars above as she pulled the jacket closer to her lithe frame.

   “When I was six or seven, my mom taught me how,” Poe said, “she used to be a Rebel fighter pilot, she taught me in her A-Wing.”

   “I think I've scavenged a few of those back on Jakku, they're nice, not as mobile as the X-Wings, but pretty good,” Rey said.

   “My mom used to fly here around like an X-Wing,” Poe laughed.

   “She must be proud of you,” Rey said.

    She felt an ache in her chest that wasn't her own, she could feel it coming from Poe and wondered what she said wrong.

   “She would be in a way I think, her and my dad fought so I wouldn't have to, but if she were still around I think she'd be happy I was flying at least,” Poe said.

   “Oh,” Rey said, realizing what he was saying, “I'm sorry, I didn't know.”

   “It's alright, I didn't expect you to know she was dead,” Poe assured her, the warm feeling replacing the ache in her chest and putting Rey at ease.

   “What about your father?” Rey asked.

   “He's still around, he lives on Yavin 4 where I grew up, I don't get the chance to talk to him much with everyone going on but, he's okay,” Poe said.

   “What's Yavin 4 like?” Rey asked.

    She looked over and saw Poes eyes light up, the warm feeling growing and causing her to smile too.

   “It's beautiful, it's a dense planet just covered in trees and full of life. There are fruit trees just about everywhere too,” Poe said.

   “Sounds beautiful,” Rey said.

   “You should see the sunsets there too, they're unlike anything you've ever seen,” Poe said, “I'll have to take you there sometime if you want to see it that is.”

    “I'd love to,” Rey said.

   A comfortable silence fell between them, the crackling fire giving a faint background noise. She was just about to ask when he'd met BB-8 when Poe started talking first.

   “What are your nightmares about?” Poe asked, his gaze no longer on her and on his hands.

   “It depends,” Rey said, “it goes between three of them. Sometimes it's Kylo Ren torturing me or manipulating me like he did, other times it's Snoke torturing me, making me feel like my body was going to be ripped in half while all my bones break.”

   “I'm sorry you had to go through that,” Poe said, “I think I...I think I felt it when that happened.”

   “You felt it?” Rey asked curiously.

   “I remember being knocked out on a transport ship when we were headed to Crait, and this terrible pain jolted me awake. Finn told me about what happened to you and I think I felt it when that happened, I don't know how but I did,” Poe admitted.

   “I think I feel your nightmares so I suppose we're even,” Rey admitted, “it's like something is tearing your mind apart.”

   “Kylo Ren tortured me to find out where Beebee-Ate was,” Poe said, “do you feel what everyone feels?”

   “No, not really. Sometimes I can tell when Finn is really happy or afraid, the same with Leia or even Rose from time to time. I feel a lot more from you than anyone else and I'm not sure why,” Rey said, “like right now I can sense that your feeling a bit guilty for some reason.”

   “It's bad enough I have to live through my nightmares, I don't want you to deal with them too,” Poe said.

   “Poe, it's fine,” Rey said, moving over closer to him and taking hold of his hand.

   Physical contact still wasn't something she was entirely comfortable with, but spending time with the Resistance that seemed to be full of people who hugged, shook hands, or even just leaned against one another most of the time helped her get used to it. Poe's hands were rough and calloused from years of working on ships, but they were also shaking ever so slightly, the guilt building up even more in him.

   “It doesn't bother me, really,” Rey said, “besides, I've gotten used to it, especially when we sleep in the same room together, it's not as bad then.”

   “Rey -”

   “Don't worry about it,” Rey said, ending the discussion.

   “I guess we’ll just have to keep sharing the bed to get some sleep,” Poe said.

   “I can go back to my bunk, Poe,” Rey said, though part of her regretted offering, she'd gotten used to having Poe around in the short time they'd grown closer.

   “No, it's fine, besides I think having you around is helping my nightmares a bit, that's probably why they're less intense for you,” Poe said.

   “I think it's been helping with mine too,” Rey said.

   Her nightmares had been less painful in the past week since she'd begun sleeping in Poe's room, she wasn't sure if it was directly because of him or perhaps just feeling safe in his room. Either way, she didn't want to make them worse again, not when she was finally getting some sleep at least.

   Poe let out a yawn and Rey laughed, “It sounds like you're finally getting tired again.”

   “Just a little,” Poe admitted.

   “Let’s go get some sleep then, otherwise I'll fall asleep right out here by the fire,” Rey said.

   “Lead the way, Jedi Master,” Poe said with a grin.

   “I'm the furthest thing from a Jedi Master,” Rey laughed.

   “Not to me,” Poe said.

   Rey blushed at the comment, she knew it was stupid and silly and that Poe was more than likely deletions from a lack of sleep, but she let it affect her all the same and was thankful for the darkness around them. Why was Poe Dameron making her blush and why did being around him start to make her feel like she was completely safe? She wasn't sure, but all she knew was that she liked what he made her feel, even if it was all only temporary.

#damerey #jedipilot #poe x rey #star wars #my writing #poe dameron #rey

[etherealsenpai-blog]

Aqua x Reader (SFW)

Word Count: 1,565 words

Originally posted on Wattpad. Everyone deserves a happy ending :).

The Land of Departure was the home for three potential keyblade masters. You lived there as well, since Master Eraqus was your uncle. It was entertaining watching Terra, Aqua and Ventus train. Terra was the brute force, striking the practice targets with such force they nearly fell apart. Aqua fought with grace, moving almost like a ballerina. Her strikes were carefully timed, ensuring she would have the winning edge over any opponent. Ventus was quick, moving between targets like there was no tomorrow. Sure he may of been younger than the other two, but he was quickly catching up in terms of power.

“[Name], why don't you join us down here? I have something for all of us.” Aqua says, looking over at where you sat. She seemed excited, the brightness in her eyes bringing a smile to your face. Standing from your spot, you stretch and head down to where your friends stood.

Aqua clasped her hands together and smiled brightly, “I made us good luck charms,” Aqua starts, pulling out four star shaped charms, “Somewhere out there, there's this tree with star shaped fruit. The fruit represents an unbreakable connection and as long as we carry these with us no matter where we're at, nothing can drive us apart. You'll always find your way back to each other. I mean, I think they're supposed to be made with seashells, but I did the best I could.” Aqua smiles sheepishly, dangling her charm in front of her. You all do the same and you can't help but smile.

“But why did I get one?” You ask, glancing at the [color] charm before looking at Aqua. Her eyes soften upon looking at you, the faintest hint of blush dusting her cheeks.

“Even if you don't fight, you're still very much a part of this team. I couldn't leave you out, that would've been just cruel.”

“And I'm pretty sure she likes you.” Terra quips as he walks off, a sly smile on his face. Aqua gapes, shifting on her feet and then sighing in defeat. You look between Terra’s back and Aqua, not sure what to say.

“Do you really..like me?” You point at yourself and Aqua nods. There was no sense in trying to deny it now.

“Heh, I really do. When I first met you, there was just something about you that drawn me in,” Aqua stands in front of you, placing her hand over yours, “And if something ever happens and we're all driven apart, I'll do whatever it takes to get back to you. I promise.” Aqua says, smiling gently.

“Thank you Aqua. It means a lot honestly.” You smile, gently putting the charm in your pocket.

“Don't mention it, now let's get back before it's cold.” Aqua takes your hand, leading you back to the castle like home. You never thought that Aqua would like you out of everyone, honestly you thought she liked Terra. But you were happy, happier than what you have been in recent days.

~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~

Despite training for the Mark of Mastery exam that was coming up very soon, Aqua made time for you. She would often find you hiding within your room, reading a book. You had become one of her main reasons to fight harder than ever.

“You going to watch the exams tomorrow?” Aqua asked, sitting on the edge of the bed. You look up from your book, wondering when she came into the room. Though you smile nonetheless.

“Of course, I'll be rooting you both tomorrow. But maybe you a little more.” You toss the book to the side and pat the empty spot beside you on the bed. Aqua moves there, taking your hand in hers.

“Heh, that's nice to hear. I just hope this doesn't rear our friendship apart. We both know there can be only one master.” Aqua frowns, referring to Terra. You give her hand a reassuring squeeze, making her smile slowly.

“It'd be pretty low of him if he got mad. I mean, there's always next year's exam. Nothing would be lost honestly. Am I right?” You ask. Aqua nods, turning on her side and curling up against you.

“Exactly. We'll just have to see how things go tomorrow. I'm sure it'll be okay, but you know how I worry.” Aqua chuckles sheepishly, nuzzling her head in the crook of your neck. Your face warms up due to the closeness between the two of you, but you wouldn't want it any other way. Aqua was too darn precious to push away.

“I'm sure it'll be okay as well, just get some sleep. You're going to need the rest for tomorrow.” You kiss the side of Aqua’s head, keeping a tight hold on her as she relaxes. Nothing else was said, Aqua was blushing over the kiss you left on the side of her head. She could still feel it, making her stomach fill with butterflies.

Aqua soon fell into a peaceful sleep, listening to your heartbeat and a small smile on her face.

~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~ ☆ ~

The next day, everything was chaotic. From the exam going wrong, all the way to Ventus chasing after Terra who fled the Land of Departure. Aqua was tasked with bringing them back, but the small (majority) part of her wanted to stay with you.

“Call me selfish, but I don't want to leave you.” Aqua frowned, holding your hands. Eraqus told her to say temporary goodbyes, but she wasn't ready. Not when she finally got you.

“I don't want you leaving either, but you have to get your friends back.” You smile, leaning forward and kissing Aqua gently. It was the first kiss between the two of you and the last for the time being. The thought was painful, but you smiled through the pain.

“I'll be back soon, don't you worry [Name].” Aqua walked off, looking back to wave before leaving. You watched her disappear, a quiet sigh escaping your lips.

Now it was only a matter of time until she came back. You had high hopes that everything would be okay.

~ ☆ ~ A happy Ending Because I Can't Handle the Ending of BBS ~ ☆ ~

It took several months, several near death experiences and a strong heart, but Aqua brought her friends back. A guilt ridden Terra followed behind Aqua, while Ventus walked beside her. They were all exhausted from their tedious fight with Vanitas and Master Xehanort. By some miracle, the three friends won. Terra almost lost his way into the darkness, but the power of friendship saved him.

The three enter their home, silence filling their ears as they walk toward the Master's room.

“Are they even here?” Terra asked, running a hand through his hair. They've never heard the place so quiet before, though a clatter from the kitchen and a outburst of profanity soon answer his question.

Heading into the kitchen, the three freeze when they see you in the floor picking up what was supposed to be cookies.

��I forgot the fucking floor was wet. Fucking hell, I ain't baking again goddammit.” You mumble, thinking Eraqus was watching you at the entrance. When you look up though, your mouth nearly falls to the ground. Scrambling to your feet, you slip and slide towards Aqua, Terra and Ventus, hugging them to you as best as you could.

“You guys made it! I missed you so much!” You say, doing your best to hug them, though you were sure one of them was being choked by your efforts.

“Man, you really lack faith in us [Name].” Ventus sputters, wiggling out of your hold and gasping. Turns out, he was being choked. You look at him and smile brightly, releasing Terra from the hug, but keeping Aqua close to you.

“I had full faith you guys would make it back thank you very much. I just couldn't help but worry.” You feel Aqua rest her head on your shoulder, her arms snaking around your waist.

“It wasn't easy, that's for sure. Ven, let's give these two some time and report to the master.” Terra dragged Ventus away, leaving the two of you alone. You turn your attention to Aqua, who was relaxing peacefully against you.

“It really wasn't easy, but we somehow did it. At times, I wanted to lose faith when I was alone. But whenever I thought of you, everything was okay again.” Aqua kissed you, pouring her pent up feelings into the single kiss. She missed you with all of her heart, you kept her going when things were looking bleak.

Pulling away, Aqua was blushing a bit while she touched her lips. You exhale and shift on your feet, nearly blown away by the kiss. It was so simple, but it meant so much.

“I'll always be here for you Aqua. That'll never change, I promise. I love you.” You hug her to you, enjoying the feeling of her being in your arms once again.

“I love you too [Name]. And I'll always be there for you as well.” Aqua presses herself closer, taking all of you in before hearing Master Eraqus call her name.

“I guess I'll talk to you in a little bit,” Aqua kisses you one more time before pulling away from you, “I can't wait to tell you some of the things I learned.” She says, smiling brightly before walking off. You watch her back, a dorky smile plastered on your face.

Aqua was the definition of perfection. There was nothing anyone could tell you otherwise.

#aqua #kh3 #kingdom hearts #kingdom hearts aqua #one shot #x reader #birth by sleep