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#do you realise how fucking starved for content we have been
sandinthepipes · 8 months
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The fact that I can wholeheartedly enjoy ofmd and good omens and appreciate the angst because I KNOW there will be a happy ending.
See, I’ve never had that. None of us queer folks have ever had that.
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issdisgrace · 4 months
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Haven't been on Tumblr for a while and just noticed you were taking requests so I was wondering if I can request a scenario with Thomas Hewitt where him and reader are coworkers back when the slaughter house was open. And like maybe once everyone left, they'd fool around in the boss's office or something. And if it's possible can reader be Dom top? Anyway, I hope you have a good day!
MANAGERS OFFICE​
WARNINGS: Making out, ass eating, fucking, you know the normal smut stuff​ ​
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You had recently become a keyholder to the slaughterhouse, meaning you were now the one that opened and closed.
You got this extra responsiblty because the manger hated having to open early and close late. You were also one of the only ones he trusted enough not to abuse the power of having keys to the slaughterhouse.
This was arangment was fine for a couple of weeks until the manger started to push more of his responsibilies off on you.
Wanting to get back at him one night after everyone left you led Thomas up to the office. He was confused at first but quickly got the message as you pulled him into a kiss.
A kiss quickly turned into two then eventually it turned into a make out session. You felt each other up and pawed at the others clothes. The pawing at each other's clothes quickly turned into clothes coming off.
After clothes were off things progressed even further and Thomas found himself bent over the desk getting his ass eaten out by you.
He moaned as you ate him like a starving man. Pushing himself back into you. Practially suffocating in his ass you felt at content as you fucked him open using your tounge and fingers.
Once he was open enough. You got up, spit on your hand before slathering your cock with the spit. Lining up with Thomas you slowly push in, his tight hole envloping him.
You fucked him slow and hard at first before gradually quickening your pace. You fucked him so hard and with such vigor that he felt like he was being split open.
In the past, you've fucked him hard and fast but not like this. You've never fucked him like this. It was like you were trying to fuck a kid into him and to be fair that thought had crossed your mind but that wasn't your ulimate goal.
With the way you were fucking him and on top of the fact that you guys were doing so in your managers office it was no suprise that Thomas came fast.
Still not satiated you continued to fuck him into overstimualtion and by the time you came he had alread cummed 2 more times.
Slowly coming down from both of your highs. You realised how late it was. You both quickly cleaned up then you locked up the slaughterhouse as Thomas waited out in the car, needing to rest specially after what we did.
Once you locked up and headed out to the car. The two of you drove home in silence. Both of you silently bracing yourselves for the ear full that you two would get from Hoyt once you got back because Luda Mae forced everyone to wait for the two of you to get back before eating.
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Mommy!May: Arrangement
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Content Includes: Mommy!Seonghwa x demisexual fem!reader, messy….MESSY, angst (so much of it), protected sex, touch-starved reader, kissing, foreplay, oral (f receiving), cum play, fingering (f receiving), swearing, 18+, based off true events. 
Word Count: 3.1 K
You never thought you would end up being this desperate for a man’s touch. 
Years of pent-up emotional and physical celibacy are now being broken for a scheduled dick appointment with a taken man. 
It all started over a tipsy conversation with you and your best friend, who’d you had known for years, the two of you making quiet conversation on the couch as a Netflix romance comedy played quietly in the background. 
‘I don’t get it, why don’t you just fuck a guy off Tinder? It’s simple, you just fuck, cum and leave’. 
You choked on your wine glass and stared at her in annoyance, rolling her eyes as you began a conversation that had been repeated many times. 
‘It’s not that simple for me, I need to have those feelings there, I can’t just fuck a guy without a connection, it’s not pleasurable for me’. 
She sighed in response and reached for the wine bottle, talking as she filled up both your glasses with the red liquid. 
‘Well, you have to do something because it’s clearly having an effect on you’.
She put the wine bottle back on the coffee table and reverted her attention back towards you, watching you stare into the glass as a means of feigned distraction. 
‘I don’t know anyone who’s gone for as long without sex like you have and you’re getting lonely, you’re not as upbeat as you used to be’. 
The words hit you deep in your heart and not because she was being so casual about her chosen words, most would find it offensive but your friend was painfully blunt with everything she said, so you had learnt to take her words as they were. 
The words hurt because it was fucking true and your defenses were up, navigating the conversation the best way you knew how. 
Humour. 
‘And what? You think you can change that? How? You’re going to loan me your boyfriend for the night? See if he’ll fuck the loneliness out of me and make me feel better?’ 
The snarkiness was strong in an attempt to hide the twang in your chest and your choked breath, taking a much needed swig out of the glass before shifting your attention back to your friend. 
Who was now quiet and looked at you with curiosity, her body open and relaxed. 
‘What?’ 
‘Would you want to fuck Seonghwa? I could ask him, you know? He’d probably say yes’. 
Your eyes widened and cheeks went red out of embarrassment at even questioning such a thought, curling your body away from her. 
‘What! I was just being sarcastic, he’s your boyfriend…why would you even say that?’ 
She leaned down to place her wine glass on the table, crossing her legs and leaning further towards you. 
‘Honey…Seonghwa is my person and we’re happy, you know that and besides, you’ve known him for as long as I have- so I’m sure that connection is there right?’
Anxiety stirred in your chest at even the thought of such an idea. 
And the shame was even more overpowering once you realised how enticed you were by the offer. 
Seonghwa had a beautiful heart and he adored your best friend, they were so perfect and cheesy together and it was gross and disgusting and OMG how you yearned for even just a fragment of it. 
You may have been jealous of their relationship at one point and sure-you may have checked out Seonghwa more than a few times. 
But that was a moral boundary you would never cross and never intended too. 
‘I mean…yeah but wouldn’t that be weird? I don’t know if I can fuck your boyfriend and then just act like nothing happened’.
‘Why not? It’s just for one night, then we’ll never discuss it again, we can move forward and just forget it ever happened’. 
The conversation continued with further discussion, more notably with how protection would be used and of course, she would have to get Seonghwa’s opinion first. 
It was strange but exciting- the situation was never one you expected but the idea of being cared for by a man you felt safe with, even on an emotional level. 
It sparked a desire in you that you hadn’t felt for awhile. 
And so, with all thoughts of rationality leaving your mind. 
You did the unthinkable. 
You said yes. 
The expensive fragrance of your perfume was the final touch needed for your outfit, giving yourself a quick glance in the mirror for any needed touch-ups. 
You smoothed your hands over the black, lace dress that had adorned your body, your special occasion dress that made you feel beautiful every time you wore it. 
The feeling of uncertainty still lingered in your belly as you admired the stockings you wore…and heels. 
There wasn’t really a point to it because you were just wearing them to your living room but they made you feel pretty and Seonghwa was apparently a legs man. 
Fuck, you can’t believe that he actually agreed to this. 
A few days after your friend’s ‘kind’ offer, you had received a message explaining how he said yes and you both organised a night where he would come to you. 
Which you were thankful for because whilst this wasn’t cheating and all parties were enthusiastic and consenting. 
The idea of you fucking your friend’s boyfriend in their bed wasn’t exactly the most appealing thing to experience. 
And so you had spent the day buying new sheets and lingerie, purchasing a fresh bottle of wine and a scented candle because I don’t know-maybe the candle might make things better? 
The lights were dim, your hair was shiny and your face lightly made up and you almost felt calm and grounded. 
Until your phone pinged. 
And the screen lit up with a familiar number. 
‘Hey, I’m outside :)’
‘Oh wow, thank you. I wasn’t expecting this’ 
You chuckled out of surprise as Seonghwa handed you a single red rose, sniffing it lightly as you ran your eyes over Seonghwa’s attire. 
Black silk shirt with sleeves unbuttoned, dark jeans, boots and his dark, shaggy hair parted to the side. 
He looked gorgeous, desirable and wow- this was a level of effort you were not expecting. 
‘There was a lady outside selling them and I know you like roses so…’ 
He spoke as he stepped into the room, closing the door behind him. 
‘Well, thank you’ 
You reached out to rub his arm lightly in a gesture of fondness. 
‘I really appreciate it’. 
Seonghwa took a step towards you and there was a soft smirk on his face as he slowly leaned in and pressed a soft kiss to your cheek, the smallest of intimate touches already sending your heart ablaze. 
‘You’re welcome’ 
He whispered in your ear. 
And his voice alone was enough for your breath to shudder lightly, anticipation stirring in your chest. 
‘Would you like some wine? I haven’t tried it before but the lady at the store said it was pretty good so…yeah’ 
Mindless small talk was exchanged between you and Seonghwa as you stood in the kitchen, pouring wine into two glasses as Seonghwa leaned against the kitchen bench. 
‘So…how long do I have you tonight? I wasn’t told much, do you need to be out of here by a certain time?’ 
His fingertips grazed your wrist as he took the wine glass from you, the touching was so indiscreet you weren’t entirely sure if he was doing it on purpose. 
And he absolutely was because he could feel the nerves radiating off your body the moment he handed you the rose. 
Seonghwa chuckled half-heartedly at the response as he took a sip of wine, his bright teeth calming the air of tension that lingered. 
‘No- Do you think I’d fuck you and just leave? We have all night together’. 
Seonghwa’s abrasiveness left you surprised and you could feel the blush creep upon your cheeks, he really was a no-nonsense man. 
‘Well-I just wanted to prepare myself for what I was expecting’. 
You fiddled with the lace of your dress and stared down at your shoes, trying to figure out how a mindless conversation in the kitchen will turn into Seonghwa’s body on top of you. 
A gentle brush of fingers was felt on your arm as Seonghwa placed his wine on the bench, delicately removing the nearly-empty glass from your hands and placing it next to his. 
‘I’m not being a good guest am I?’ He teased, his voice low and a glint of mischief in his eyes. 
‘I almost forgot to tell you how beautiful you look right now’
His hands ran down your shoulders and settled near your waist, crowding you against the bench and you felt so small under his touch, your hands tentatively moving to his sides. 
‘You look handsome yourself, I still don’t know why you chose to do this’ 
You chimed as your hands slowly ran up his body, feeling the silkiness of his shirt under your fingertips. 
‘Because I know you feel safe with me’ 
His hands reached up to gently cradle your face, tilting your chin up so you were forced to look into his eyes and they were no longer filled with humour but serious, almost intimidating with how intense his gaze is. 
‘And you’re lonely’. 
A soft pair of lips was felt against your forehead and you could smell Seonghwa’s cologne soaking into your skin, making you giddy, making your skin warm with need. 
‘And I can’t give you what you need’.
You could feel his thumbs stroking your cheekbones and his nose almost touching yours, the energy was so strong, you could cut it like a knife. 
‘But I can give you tonight’. 
He kissed your mouth softly, almost timidly and he pulled away with a soft sound. 
‘Does that sound good?’
It had been so long since you had felt a man’s hands on your body, so long since receiving any type of attention or care at all. 
‘Absolutely’ 
You breathed out before leaning up and kissing him again, it was chaste and clean but it had been years since you’ve even made out with someone, you hoped kissing was an artform you hadn’t forgotten. 
‘Tell me’ Seonghwa spoke in between each kiss, his hands wrapped around your forearms. 
‘When was the last time you had sex?’ 
A shaky breath was felt in your chest, okay did he need to be this forward?
I guess he did. 
‘Years, it’s been years’. 
‘Really?’ 
He responded with a shock he couldn’t quite contain, the comment surprising him and he cleared his throat, attempting to hide the unexpected. 
Seonghwa knew you were a romantic and an emotional connection was needed in order to have sex, he knew about your failed attempts with men and the rejection you received. 
Unbeknownst to you, his partner told him absolutely everything about your friendship. 
He had seen you cry and gave you tissues and sweet words of comfort when another worthless man rejected your advances. 
He saw the sadness in your eyes whenever he showed affection to his girlfriend whilst you were there. 
‘Yeah…I know it’s been awhile…but I’ll try my best to make it good for the both of us’. 
The words wobbled in your throat as you spoke them, the intrusive thoughts expanding in your mind and spiralling. 
If you’re going to fuck one time, then you’ll give your best performance so he’ll remember this one time. 
‘Precious’ 
One final, gentle kiss. 
‘Don’t worry, I’m already enjoying tonight, I’m enjoying being with you’. 
Your mind and body were in a daze from euphoria and forgotten sensations. 
The trail of Seonghwa’s fingers on your bare skin, the look of care and need in his eyes as he undresses you, fervent kisses on your breasts, his warm and wet tongue on your clit. 
Everything felt heightened, sensationalised, electrified. 
Your mind was knocked back into the present when you felt Seonghwa’s mouth form a hard suction over your clit, his fingers gripping into your thighs, forcing them apart. 
‘Fuck…ahh!...it feels so good’ 
Pants and soft moans filled the room with a strewn arm thrown over your eyes, his relentless tongue and mouth almost becoming too much-so overwhelmed from so little. 
And he wasn’t even inside of you yet. 
‘You’re dripping precious, want you to cum all over Mommy’s face’. 
‘Wait-what?’
A tilt of your chin was all you needed to look at Seonghwa’s reddened face, revealing he said something he definitely did not mean too. 
‘Mommy?’ A questioning tone was heard in the room. 
‘Y-yeah, I thought she would have told you?’ 
‘I thought she was joking, I mean, I can see it but I thought she was fucking around’. 
Seonghwa started to lift himself, wiping his mouth as he spoke. 
‘We can just move on from it-’ 
‘No’ You frantically yelled out, a frenzy going over you as you threaded your fingers in Seonghwa’s hair, wanting him to lick you again. 
‘I don’t care, I’ll call you whatever you want, I’m so close…please keep going!’ 
Tears were pooling in your eyes from the frustration and being wound up, maybe you would think about it in the future. 
But right now you just don’t fucking care. 
Seonghwa groaned darkly, his voice vibrating through your core as he began eating you feverishly, almost like he could fully let go now. 
‘I thought you were a dirty girl’ 
Seonghwa moaned as his tongue flicked at your clit, his hips grinding into the mattress. 
‘You just needed Mommy to show you how dirty you are’. 
The teasing settled into the pit of your stomach and the coil was tightening, your whimpers growing and…
With a soft nibble to the underside of your clit, the band snapped. 
A palm clasped heavily over your mouth was used to stifle your cries, feeling your hips kick back into the mattress and your cunt clench around his fingers. 
Wet kisses against your core sent you spasming lightly, like Seonghwa was attempting to delay your orgasm for as long as possible. 
‘When I look at you from now on’ 
Seonghwa spoke as he trailed lazy kisses up your body, making his way up to your face. 
‘I’ll remember how sweet you taste on Mommy’s tongue’. 
The messy comment felt like cleanliness to your heart-starved mind, a pandora’s box disguised as pandora’s pleasure. 
‘But…’
An eager hand removed your palm, holding your wrist against him as Seonghwa looked at you with a warning glare in his eyes. 
‘Don’t hide your moans from me, Mommy wants to hear how good I make you feel…okay?’
‘O-okay’ His gaze was borderline intimidating, feeling almost trapped under his primal-like stare. 
‘Okay?’ His eyebrow quirked. 
‘Okay…Mommy?’ 
His gaze softened into something sweet, with a soft and affirmative smile. 
‘Good…good girl for Mommy’. 
Seonghwa’s plush mouth pressed against yours, tasting yourself as he licked your bottom lip. 
‘You listen so well’. 
‘Take deep breaths, just try to relax while I get myself ready’. 
The warmth of his body left yours and you stared mindlessly at the ceiling, hearing clothes drop to the floor and the sound of a condom wrapper tearing. 
Is it going to hurt? Am I wet enough? 
It’s been so long, I hope I’ll remember what to do. 
I hope it’s good-for both of us. 
A tap on your hip brought you into the present as you felt a pillow shoved under your hips, averting your gaze to see Seonghwa’s naked body and the thin latex covering his cock. 
‘You ready?’ 
‘Y-yeah’ Your voice cracked with uncertainty, shifting to get your hips comfortable. 
‘Just….’ You reached out to grab Seonghwa’s hand, clenched with worry. 
‘Go slow…please?’ 
Seonghwa’s warmth in his eyes and his smile helped to soothe the tension lightly, his nurturing energy and all-round care for you helped cement your reasoning in this being the right decision. 
At least right now. 
‘Of course, tonight is about you. You’re Mommy’s priority right now’. 
His tip prodded at your entrance and your body clenched in response to the foreign sensation. 
‘Mom-mommy’ 
You gasped out, clutching his forearms as Seonghwa hovered over you, his hands pressed beside your face. 
‘It’s okay…breathe’ He kissed the tip of your nose, ‘Mommy’s got you’. 
Jolts of electricity surged from your core down to the balls of your feet as Seonghwa breached you, the feeling of being split open was so prominent it was borderline painful. 
‘F-fuck, you’re so tight, I can feel you pulling me in’
His head hung low and his fringe brushed over his lashes, shiny mouth, taut muscles and sweat on his brow. 
Seonghwa looked ethereal, glowing and wrecked in all the best ways possible. 
You already were fucked. 
From this moment, you know you would never forget how LOVED you felt with this man on top of you. 
And as Seonghwa began to slowly move in and out of you, your legs locking him against you fingers tightly interlocked with his and cheeks flushed and eyes glazed with pleasure. 
His heart twisted in a way he wasn’t expecting, his girlfriend forgotten, the brevity of this situation forgotten. 
All he could focus on were how desperate you felt under him, the need to PLEASE and the need to be GOOD overwhelmed his senses that he hadn’t experienced before with his partner. 
A particularly hard thrust had you crying out in surprise, tears pricking your eyes and fingers pressing into Seonghwa’s knuckles. 
Seonghwa panted out, his thrusts slowing down and he released his hand to cup your face. 
‘Are you okay? Mommy got carried away’. 
Your arms wrapped tight around Seonghwa’s shoulders as you held him taut against you, holding him like he was your lifeline. 
‘Keep going…please Mommy’ You whined out, brow all scrunched up ‘Don’t stop’. 
You didn’t finish and you weren’t expecting too, the feeling of being held and cared for was enough for you. 
The warmth of Seonghwa’s release was felt with Seonghwa’s whine in your ear, evoking a sense of happiness in understanding you were good enough for him to finish. 
‘You did so well’ His eyes were hazy as he rubbed your shoulders, your body still tense and holding him to you. 
You knew you had to let him go eventually. 
You just didn’t want to. 
‘Thank you for doing this, it was incredible’ 
A lingering kiss was shared, one that might not be shared again. 
‘Mommy will stay awhile precious, make sure you’re okay’.
The night ended with Seonghwa’s body pressed close to yours, feigning sleep because you knew he’d be gone by the time you woke up. 
If only at the time, you knew. 
How messy a simple arrangement can be. 
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dixongrimesgirl · 3 months
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Sinful Secret
S7 Negan Smith x fem!grimes reader
Content includes: Unprotected sex, PiV, secret relationship, Alexandria era, caught, oral (f receiving), pet names (sweetheart, my girl)
WC: 770
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You had secretly been seeing Negan for a while now without the knowledge of anyone in Alexandria. It's past 1am and you heard your father and Michonne go to bed a little while ago. When you're sure the coast is clear you sneak downstairs and let Negan in. "Hey, sweetheart. Thought ya weren't gonna let me in" he teased. "You know that's not true. I just had to make sure everyone was asleep" you reply before leading the way upstairs to your room. He lands a soft smack on your ass as you walk up the stairs in front of him causing you to let out a quiet giggle. "We have to be quiet" you whisper. "What? Ya don't wan' ol' Rick seeing us together?" he asks. You send him a glare and he chuckles. "Okay, sweetheart," he says and you enter your room closing the door softly behind the two of you. He immediately throws you on the bed and climbs on top of you. "Fuck sweetheart" he groans when you wrap your legs around his waist pressing your core against his bulge. He plants his lips on yours and you part your mouth allowing him to slip his tongue in. He swallows your moans as he rubs your nipples over the thin fabric of your tank top. He kisses down your neck and pulls your shirt up and over your head, throwing it onto the floor. He sucks a nipple in his mouth and gently bites down, loving how you moan and squirm beneath him. He wishes you didn't have to be so quiet. He can't wait until he gets you back to the sanctuary and you can make all the noise you want. Thinking about you screaming his name causes him to involuntarily thrust his hips into yours. He pulls back and hastily pulls your sleep shorts down and groans noticing you're not wearing any panties. He tosses your shorts onto the floor and positions his head between your legs before devouring you like a starved man. he shoves two fingers into your already slick hole and you clench around them. "So tight" he breathes out. "How ya gonna take my cock, sweetheart?" he asks. "I can do it" you insist. "I know ya can but first let me feel ya cum on fingers" he whispers. You cover your mouth with your held holding back your moans while you ride out your orgasm. He fucks you with his fingers through it all and as you come down from your high you hear the squelching of your pussy. "Good girl" he praises and you sigh gently closing your eyes. He shoves his fingers in your mouth and you swirl your tongue around them. "Damn girl. Got me so fuckin' hard" he grunts and before you know it he's lining himself up with your entrance. "Negan" you moan as he bottoms out in one hard thrust. "So fuckin tight" he groans. He pulls out and slams back in. You don't even hear the headboard banging against the wall. You clench around him. "I know you're close, sweetheart. Cum for me" he growls and you release, your slick covering his cock and with a few more thrusts he's realising inside you. You're both startled when there's a knock at the door. "Y/N?" you hear your Dad's say. "Shit" you mutter and get up throwing on your pyjamas. You open the door. "Are you okay?" he asks. "Yeah. I'm fine" you reply. "Good. I just heard a lot of noises and was worried something..." he trails off as Negan appears clad only in his boxers. "What the hell is he doing here?" Rick growls. "Spending time with my girl" he replies and you're thighs involuntarily squeeze together. "If you hurt her" Rick threatens. "I wouldn't hurt her. She wants this just as much as me. Look at her when I call her my girl" he says and you can't help but squeeze your thighs shut again. "See. I do that to her" he says. "Wanna stay for the show? We were just about to go for round 2. Isn't that right sweetheart?" he asks. "Get out of my house!" Rick growls. "Alright, alright." Negan replies and turns to give you a kiss. You kiss him back and he slips is tongue in your mouth. "Now!" Rick yells when Negan's hand starts groping your ass. "See you later sweetheart" he says and you give him a small wave when Rick isn't looking. You know you're gonna be in big trouble but you can't help your feelings. If only your dad could understand.
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melonteee · 3 months
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May I recommend some One Piece fics? One of them has me clawing the walls and wanting to write ten billion fics about all the OP women _:(´ཀ`」 ∠): and the other fundamentally changed me as a human being.
The former is a Robin centred fic and the latter is a Sanji centred fic. If you have read these before, sorry if I’m just parroting what you’ve already read! Also please feel no pressure to read these, I just wanted to share with a fellow OP enjoyer :DDD
Sanji Fic: Custom of the Sea - 17K: https://archiveofourown.org/works/39516201?view_adult=true
So this one really, REALLY explores Sanji’s duties as a chef and how far he’d be willing to go to ensure that his crew won’t starve (if you know what the title of the fic means then you’re halfway there) and there are heavy warnings at the start of the fic that I won’t repeat but I will state that the fic is tagged with “angst with a happy ending” so a heaping helping of optimism is needed whilst reading!
(I did not read the tags thoroughly though I still enjoyed the fic, but please don’t be as silly as me)
I love when a One Piece fic explores the connections between the Straw Hats (some more than others, cough ZORO cough) and I especially love the flashbacks we get with Chef Zeff— I will never be able to stop thinking about them and clutching at my chest like I’m trying to ease an unseen weight (the burden, oh the burden of loving a fictional blond man).
I love how Sanji is written, how we get to see him reduced to his base components, how as he thins with each day we see what becomes transparent beneath all the layers; who he truly is when stripped down to the bone.
^ tryhard
There is also a scene that is so reverent; so intimate; so raw that it feels like a violation to intrude upon such a private moment and a discourtesy that it isn’t being analysed and examined by every literature study or professor alive. Wow it fucks me up that this fic only has 8K hits. The author also writes some good ZoSan fics if that’s also something you’d like :))
Robin Fic: What is and What could never be - 58K (unfinished as far as I’m aware): https://archiveofourown.org/works/42768912/chapters/107441889
Robin. Has. A child.
[incoherent wailing about motherhood, unconditional love, the fear of loving someone and letting them love you back, love you thought you lost but has endured all along]
I haven’t even finished it yet nor am I even anywhere close in the timeline in which the fic takes place but I already know it’s one of my favourite fics I’ve read, and has made me realised that I have overlooked the OP women in the most egregious manner possible.
I absolutely adore your OP character analysis videos, and having your big brain analysis sitting in the back of my mind while reading this fic has made me appreciate and enjoy this fic tenfold.
Nico Robin I love you in a way that heals me and hurts me.
I am also a tremendous sucker for Frobin (the author wrote smut for this fic which 😳) but I also adore her relationships with Chopper, Nami and Luffy which absolutely enamoured me and has scorched my brain, leaving a permanent mark. Also extremely cruel and wicked that this fic only has 8K hits.
Anyway I wrote all of this at 1am, so if I sound mad it’s because I am. Thanks for creating hilarious and extremely insightful analysis videos, I’ve been watching your channel since the MHA character design video (I still burst out laughing thinking about Todoroki’s design sometimes) and I always look forward to new vids :D
Thank you for these but I can’t promise I’ll read them haha, I don’t tend to read too many fics but I appreciate the thought. I know you didn’t do it here but I also ask to please not send me smut fics or anything since I’m not an nsfw account and also a stranger to you guys 😅
And thank you so much for enjoying my content! ❤️
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lordeemailarchive · 1 year
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PART ONE: Eating two slices of ice cream cake with James Murphy
(04/11/2022) (Solar Institute Bulletin No. 19) (From New York)
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If elegance is arriving somewhere without a commute story, then in the newslettersphere, elegance is starting your letter with anything BUT an apology for its lateness. I’ve owed you a letter for ages now, and one hasn’t come. For that, I’m sorry!!! Since the summer I’ve felt the weeks spinning through my fingers like fine thread. Airports, shows, cars, bursts of loneliness and melancholy, moments of sun. They might as well pay me in jet fuel, I’ve been on so many fucking planes this year (if you’re looking for a saviour, ETC); haven’t been in one place for more than two weeks since… July, I guess, not that that’s any sort of excuse, but things just kept happening and the list of things to tell you about kept getting longer until it was overwhelming, and so it goes. As Rachel Cusk says, one has to serve out one’s changes moderately, like strong wine. By that logic, I’ve been drunk for months, and with that state comes ups and downs — intense jonesing for home and family, a struggle at times to resource myself, feelings of inadequacy, of longing and loss. A couple times I’ve been backstage doing vocal warmups before a show thinking, What the fuck can I offer these people right now, when I myself feel as loose and spare as a tooth or a tyre? So finally today, sitting in a basement with bleach disciplining my scalp, I thought — today’s the day I’m gonna write to you. And for your troubles — TWO PARTS TO THIS BAD BOY. For all things tour — recent pics, updates on upcoming shows, et al, see part two. Between drinks, it has been an intense period of what I’d call research — not writing songs as such, but reading, conceptualising, writing a ton of stuff down, laying the foundation of… something. I’m feeling excited and challenged. A little nervous. Teeth in my shoulder.
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Warmup
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Milan sneak peek (more dispatched via the Institute)
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Best thing seen this year - bioluminescence activated by the movement of the waves. does anyone know what kind of seaweed this is? Where my biologist SCsWWTS at?)
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Bathroom floor after Primavera, Los Angeles
Have felt your love in general, these past couple months. All year, of course, but special moments keep coming sweet and bright — touching a tattoo in the rain, or my mum sending a photo of a freshie in the supermarket. Running into people who were at Radio City, hearing about everyone’s different nights — my waiter being accidentally on mushrooms there, a sweet boy in the grocery store who went by himself. And then, holy shit, the intense, overwhelming outpouring of love that was Mexico. I’m still riding high on what a warm welcome we got, how sweet and dedicated you all are, what finally being able to hug you and not let go for ten seconds felt like. I did get a terrible cold, but it was worth it. 
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STARVING YOU OF LAUREN’S GORGEOUS SHOW PICS + GENERAL TOUR CONTENT BECAUSE OF PART TWO random iphone pics only!!
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Have written the story of my 72 hours in Milano and where I went after as an Institute dispatch, FYI. What’s been going on with me? This podcast episode. Remember this from last year? Going to see said painting at MoMa, having mind blown. Finally going to Tiny Doll House (AS A NEW YORK ACTIVITY I REALLY. CAN’T. RECOMMEND THIS ENOUGH). Seeing Dev play in the round. Thinking about work that feels open enough to contain different stories and meanings. Sitting in the sunshine talking about hearing One Dance for the first time. Watermelon 5 gum (A DERANGED AIRPORT PURCHASE THAT I’M LOVING… XYLITOL CAN YOU BELIEVE SHE’S BEEN OUT OF NZ TOO LONG!!). Finally read Essential Labor By Angela Garbes and it blew my damn brains out. Loving Cusk, halfway through Second Place. Natasha Brown’s Assembly and David Milch’s Life’s Work waiting in the wings. Read Natalia Ginzburg’s Voices in the Evening on a beach in Greece. Always so fascinating to me as I get older and realise that the books I’m gravitating towards are a little bit like my browser search history, getting at the questions I’m asking. Domesticity, family, parenting… paging Dr. Freudette! This conversation between Hilton Als and Terrence Hayes in the Paris Review is one of the most gagging interviews I’ve ever read. The podcast POOG, which I’m late to discovering but completely obsessed with. Like the rest of New York, Kate has me in a chokehold. “As she banters about skin care, you get the sense that her refusal to play herself onstage is part of a larger personal preoccupation with the ways that the coherent “self” is always a doomed project.” (Shades of Cusk???) Gonna buy these Kari Māori cards for Christmas presents this year. This newsletter took so damn long I missed Mahuru Māori, but I consumed a ton of really thoughtful work by a variety of creators during that month, a highlight being this podcast episode reflecting on the 50 year anniversary of the Maori language petition being delivered to Parliament, and the future of reo in our country. Haven’t seen Tár yet but it’s on my list. LOVED Corsage. Wanted to like Triangle of Sadness more than I did, although it was fun in the room. Watching the movement in Iran with my heart in my mouth. I cannot believe the bravery of these women. FUCK YOU BOLSONARO AND GOOD RIDDANCE.
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Leaving you with two quotes, that could be applied to making stuff, or just to living your life. “First you hate something, then you investigate why you hate something. That is exciting — and for creative people, to be excited is the only way.” From Mrs. Prada. And this, such a classic, from Kris Kristofferson upon hearing Blue for the first time: “‘Jesus, Joni,’ he said. ‘Save something for yourself.’” No. Shan’t. Throbbing with love for you. PART TWO INCOMING! E
(source: received this email)
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aubigney · 1 year
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i'm starting to think this habit is a lifestyle.
[posted 3 days ago]
it used to be that every few months i would go a night of no sleep. it’s okay, i reasoned, because i would sleep enough the next night. it was usually on a friday or a saturday night, so i could sleep all of sunday and feel refreshed and ready for my students on monday.
i began to notice a pattern, though, a pattern which, of course, my adhd brain never fucking remembers. i would never sleep on the nights i film videos. last night i filmed two videos, because now i batch in order to blast content from my urethral tubes at the speed of light (2 videos a week). i’m so tired, my tits hurt for some reason, but i’m the happiest i think i’ve ever been since i met my wife. if it is possible to be even happier than the day i met her, than the day i realised i fell in love with her, than the day we decided to get married, then this is it. i’m the happiest i have ever been.
let’s keep it rolling, babes. if by some miracle you found me in the wild, check out my youtube videos @ aubigney tv, and if you came over from youtube, well. this is what you’re getting!
i think i’ve figured out some things to do with my business. the first is that i don’t want money from individual people. patreon is a no-go every time i try it, and some of my audience is people living in poverty and some of it is students who have no money. i don’t want money from those sides of my audience. your views, likes, and comments are enough.
the second thing is that what i want money from is companies. corporations. conglomerates. chaebols. other c words that we all know and love. corporatism is alive and well, babes, and i would be a fool not to milk it. of course, i have a very small audience and garner a small amount of views, so it would be ridiculous to expect a company, any company, to want to work with me. maybe when i’m a… sigh… microinfluencer of say a couple thousand subscribers. it’s something i could look into then.
i’m also interested in getting more involved with the poverty and disability sector in my local area. i’m ashamed to admit this but i haven’t given it much thought until a few weeks ago. a friend of mine mentioned that they work as a carer and i thought, “i’m good with people. i could do that job.” that, however, remains to be seen. i’m not sure what good i could do or what area i should go into—or even if anyone will have me. helping people is a tough gig to break into in that sense, but to be perfectly honest, i don’t think i’m going to be able to connect with people in a meaningful way if i don’t.
this life, this love, this joy, is all about making connections. it’s about meeting people and being charmed by them. and i’m so, so ready to charm.
p.s. i’m currently obsessed with the game don’t starve (did i mention that in my previous video?) and it’s cluttering my mind palace. i’m hungry now, which is what always happens when i play don’t starve for hours at a time.
p.p.s. i scrapped a video yesterday that had to do with critiquing a poem (“night walk” by franz wright). not because the video wasn’t good, it just wasn’t interesting. i am, as they say, following my bliss, aligning my chakras, and drinking the blood of the innocent like my personal friend gwyneth paltrow. (i swear i saw a business guru youtuber with an iv drip and all the comments were “bro are you okay?” yeah he’s just taking up vital fluids needed to give to sick people, don’t worry about it.) as much as i love media, i’m not in love with it anymore. i’m taking a turn. chucking a u-ey. doing burnouts in the macca’s parking lot. you know how it is.
p.p.p.s. the video coming out on tuesday is an interview with a fellow youtuber! exciting.
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silentmoths · 2 years
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soooo, genshin men with an s/o who has that intense. blanked face and unblinking serial killer stare but in actuality they're actually a nice and dare i say funny person on the inside who's VERY socially awkward and quiet. the embodiment of "i want to friend but i don't know how to friend pls help".
bonus points if they're smol because that would make it even funnier. like you're afraid of this tiny ass gremlin? what's up with OH MY GOD WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT LOOK ON YOUR FACE-
bonus BONUS points if they're touch starved because the pandemic fucked us up and we all need a hug.
how dare you know me so well that I couldn't resist, because I too am a resting blank face, touch starved bitch lmao. lessgo~
Ft: Diluc, Zhongli and Childe (I would have done more but it's been a very long day)
I may have also had a fair bit to drink at the work party so forgive any horrible spelling mistakes screams
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Diluc
¤ He found your lack of expression somewhat refreshing actually, it meant that when you did actually crack a smile, it was genuine, and there was always a great pride swelling in his chest whenever he manages it.
¤ He doesn't mind that you're not social, heck, neither is he, two birds of a feather, with equally terrible, sometimes dry humor.
¤ your similar sense of humor actually came as quite a shock, the first time you cracked a joke, he very nearly missed it, until he did a double take, replaying what you'd just said in your head and ends up half leaning on the counter trying not to wheeze.
¤ Not to mention, your thousand-yard stare could dissuade just about anyone, and he was always greatful that you were able to pick up on when Diluc wanted someone to leave him alone, and would activate said stare.
¤ However his favorite moments are always those in private, after a long day's work, his favorite thing was you pushing your face into his chest, whether it be when you're lying in bed together, or if he's stuck staying up late in his office looking over documents; you'd either lay beside him, or he'd shift his chair out just a little to make space for you to clamber into his lap and rest your chin on his shoulder, either way it always ended with you dozing happily with one of his arms wrapped around you.
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Zhongli
¤ He won't lie to himself, at first he thought your stare was somewhat unnerving, even to his 6000 year old ass, but the longer he'd spent around you, the more endearing he found it.
¤ this dude is the smooth motherfucker who can tell your mood simply from the way you stare, the subtle crease of your brow or the faintest squint, to anyone else you're fucking horrifying sometimes, but he could take one look and discern that no, you were not angry, you were hungry and wanted a hug.
¤ In a way, he's somewhat glad for it. Being able to understand your needs likely before even you realised you needed them was a blessing, a silent communication that mean't he could be a steadfast and attentive partner, even if at times you told him it was eerie how easily he could discern your face.
¤ He would also never admit it to anyone but you, but your deadpan delivery of the occasional joke you did crack was amazing. Especially whenever you did it near Hu-Tao, the directors confused and somewhat shocked face always filled the archon with an unspeakable sense of satisfaction
¤ It came as a shock when he realised just how much affection you craved, if it wasn't for busy work schedules between you both, he's sure you'd spend the entire day clinging onto him, which he certainly wouldn't mind...especially when he got to watch your expression melt into something truly content, yes that was definitely his favorite part.
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Childe
¤ This idiot LOVES the face honestly. Relishes it, in some aspects he makes it his life's damn goal to try and make you crack a smile wiht every interaction, but he feels like it's a hard won battle when he gets you to wheeze with laughter.
¤ He also likes to take you along with him on 'debt collections' because if a fatui harbinger wasnt scary enough, the bitch behind him staring at them with death in their eyes sure fuckn was.
¤ He know's it's not your favorite thing to do, but on particular collections where the bank has specified no killing, he really did appreciate having you there.
¤ and he pays back in your favorite ways; fingers running softly through your hair, a hand resting on your waist, effectionate nuzzles into your skin, all the good shit.
¤ one of his favorite passtimes is staring contests, mostly unknowing staring contests. however these almost always end with one of you breaking and snickering or wheezing. honestly you're both hopeless.
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rafescoke · 3 years
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Hiii! I don’t know if you’re still taking requests but how about a rafe fic where he is super sweet and gentle and just soft with the reader in private but an asshole once their in public? Just angst and a lil but of fluff and rafe being rafe, if that’s not too much to ask!
Facade ; Rafe Cameron
masterlist
Pairing: Rafe Cameron x reader
Summary: “This whole thing you’re showing to people. . . that’s not you. Fuck you.”
Warnings: Angst, angst, and more angst. Not the ending everyone’s expecting  (I think) 
A/N: I’m extremely sorry if this isn’t my best work but thank you for 700+ followers wtf ily <3 finishing all requests in my inbox this week!
“Don’t leave me yet,” Rafe groans. He places his arms around her waist, snuggling close. Her scent of strawberry wafts into his nostrils, and he closes his eyes against her warmth.
“Work.” she mumbles, and tries to stand up again. But Rafe does not let go, still holding onto her skin as if on his last breath, and she lets out a chuckle at the adorable sight.
“I can pay you twice the amount you’re working for right now,” he says. He finally let go of her, and slumps into the vacant pillows that she had slept in a few hours ago.
“I know, and I won’t give you the satisfaction of doing so,” she smiles, and take the chance of freedom to walk towards the bathroom. She checks the naked boy on top of the bed from the mirror, her heart soaring.
His boy.
She kisses him on the cheeks when she’s finally done, swiping her thumb on his pink lips as he whimpers softly in his sleep. She kisses him again, this time on the lips, for good measures.
(Y/N) never really like the restaurant in the country club, because it’s full of impolite kooks and bratty tourists. But money is money, and she’ll never say no to a good sum of them.
She sighs, clearing another dirty table all while thinking of Rafe in his room. Her insides suddenly beam when his kisses slides through her memory, and she wishes the clock would turn faster.
She slides in the empty back room, pulling her phone out from her back pocket and tapping on the top name of her contact. Her fingers glide effortlessly, her mouth forming a smile.
miss you.
Three seconds later, her phone dings.
Rafe: Disgusting.
Rafe: Miss you more :)
She wants to go back to him as soon as possible.
The door behind her back open before she can stuff her phone back in, and she struggles to appear busy as the manager peek his head in.
“What are you doing here? It’s full house. You got a table.”
(Y/N) look up to him, trying to pretend like she wasn’t just skipping some time to text her boyfriend, and nods.
Okay, maybe not boyfriend. She’s not completely sure. They never really certify anything, but whatever’s going on between them is definitely something more than ‘friends’.
She sighs again, picking up a menu before heading towards the group of friends sitting at the long table by the golf course.
“Hey, welcome to—”
Oh my god.
“Hey, you’re (Y/N), right?”
(Y/N)’s attention snaps back to the blonde boy sitting next to Rafe, and she gulps before nodding slowly. “Um, yeah.”
“You work here?”
Is he stupid?
She refrains herself from rolling her eyes, “Yes.”
Rafe scans the menu, not looking at her, and she feel a tug at her heart. Why is he pretending not to know her? She’s not expecting a sudden hug or a kiss on the lips; she’s thinking of something like a goddamn smile.
“Might come down here often, then,” the boy laughs, and the others follow him. Except for Rafe. “What’s the best order here?”
“Pasta,” she mumbles. He’s still looking at the menu, clearly trying to ignore her piercing stare.
“Which one?” The blonde sighs, flipping through the menu. “You got bolognese, carbonara—”
“Aglio Olio,” she answers quickly. He can choke and starve for all she cares for ruining her day like this. Why would he need her opinion on this as if he has never tasted on every single dish on this menu?
“I’ll take that one,” he smiles, and peeks over her arms. “Did you write that down? Can I see it?”
What a fucking cunt.
“That’s it?” She asks, tilting her head to one side. She takes more orders from the other boys, but there’s only one left.
She looks up to him, and finally, he meets her eyes.
“What’s the best soup here?”
Really?
“All of them are good,” she answers, biting her tongue. She never told Rafe before about her workplace, and they had agreed on that, but she did not expect this kind of treatment once he finally found the answer.
“Is this how you treat the customers?”
What. The. Fuck.
(Y/N) bites her lips, and suppresses her groan while the other boys laugh. “We have the best mushroom soup.”
“I’ll go with the mushroom soup, please.”
(Y/N) scribbles down ‘mushfuckingroom soup for the asshole’ down, and gives out her fakest smile. “That’s it? I’ll come back shortly with your food.”
“One more thing—”
(Y/N) turns to them again, still holding onto that smile, “Yes?”
“Try to be nicer to the customers sometimes. That way, we’ll tip you bigger.”
She stalks off, not knowing that person under the same skin she caressed and kissed this morning.
. . .
Rafe bites his lips, sitting on the edge of the bed and pressing the call button for the 17th time tonight.
He sighs when the operator comes on, and throws his back against the mattress again.
Okay. Maybe he was mad at that time. She never told him where she works, and he assumed her workplace to be some kind of a hipster cafe with cats for decoration. He didn’t know she would be serving in the restaurant at the country club.
He texts her again, groaning.
Pick up the phone
Helloooooooooo
?
The typing notification pops up, and he waits excitedly for her reply. After a few minutes, the notification disappear. He grunts again, and goes straight to his contacts.
He presses the phone against his ear, waiting for her voice to say something; to listen to his pleas and to come back to his arms. He misses her so much, more than anything else in the world.
“Stop calling me,” she says.
He sits up straighter, feeling his blood rushing throughout his body. “Hey, how are you?”
“How’s the mushroom soup?” She mocks, and Rafe raises his brows.
He sees it clearly now.
“Are you mad about that day in the restaurant? I wasn’t even talking shit to you like Topper—”
“Really? The whole ‘bigger tips’ thing? Was that necessary?” She asks, her voice breaking.
Oh god. “It was a joke!”
“Yeah? Congra-tu-fucking-lations, Cameron, it’s a funny one,” she says, and Rafe can hear her slowly distancing voice.
He panics, “Don’t end on me. Look, I’m sorry. It’s just that you won’t tell me where you work, and it appeared as a shock to me.”
That’s the dumbest reason (Y/N) had ever heard. She feels like laughing and crying at the same time, because this is exactly the problem;
Guys like Rafe Cameron would never want to be with a girl like (Y/N) (Y/L/N).
“Suck my dick, asshole!” she yells, and slams the phone down.
Rafe pulls the phone away, his face contorting in anger, and his shoulders slump. He should’ve known better.
It’s just that. . . he’s afraid of what the others would think of him if they knew about him dating a pogue. Ward didn’t take it well when Sarah ran off with John B, and Rafe assumes he would be feeling the same way about (Y/N).
Why does life have to be so fucking complicated all the time?
Two days after, Rafe heard about a party in The Cut, but nothing from (Y/N). He know he’s fucked up big time, and he’s content to make it right with her again.
He doesn’t like stepping his foot onto The Cut, only going to the other side of the island to meet Barry for his medical issues, and sometimes to see how Sarah is doing.
But he’s driving down to the strange place again, so determined to see his girl one more time.
The party is in an abandoned warehouse, and from the outside, Rafe can see how loud and huge the party is. He sighs, thinking about the amount of time he would be wasting to find her whilst going through the throng of bodies.
But he wants to see her and touch her more than anything.
No one seems to notice him, Rafe Cameron, the Kook prince yet, and he’s hoping to keep it that way until he can pull (Y/N) out. Not one person back in Figure 8 could know about his presence in the party, what more the reason he’s there in the first place.
It’s easy to notice her. Black top, denim shorts, and (H/C) hair flowing from her shoulders. He stalks forward, extending his hand, but stops when he notices the boy beside her.
JJ fucking Maybank.
He balls his hands into a fist, and watches the way she laughs at a joke by JJ.
He takes his phone out, dialling her number, and stares as she grabs her phone out of her pocket. (Y/N) sighs, sliding the call button to the left, and keeps it in her shorts again.
Oh.
Meet me outside
Now.
(Y/N) pulls her phone out again, contorts her face at the texts, and finally look up. Her eyes scans the whole area, trying to find a particular brunette. . .
“What’s wrong?” JJ asks, touching her forearm.
“I’ll be right back,” she says, holding a finger up, and heads straight towards the exit.
Her shoes crunches against the gravel as she tries to look for Rafe’s jeep. She stands there alone, crossing her arms, and groans when she realises that he must’ve been tricking her.
Rafe slides his arms around her. “Hey, princess.”
She yelps, pushing him off and looking straight into his eyes. She relaxes when reality hits her, but stiffen again when reality hits her again.
“You’re not supposed to be here.” Her cold voice rings into his ears, but he misses her too much to care.
“C’mere,” he says, extending his hands. “Missed you.”
“Fuck off,” she announces and stalks away, only to be pulled by Rafe’s arms again. This time, she stays in his arms.
“Sorry,” he mumbles against the top of her head. “I’m sorry I was such a dick to you.”
She stays silent, trying to put up a wall between her and Rafe, but it’s near impossible. She misses him a bit too much too.
So she lets him pull her into his jeep, and whatever feud they have before dissipates into the air.
He kisses her on the lips once in the car, and when she pulls away, he groans.
“I’m not going to let you go with just a kiss after 2 weeks,” he says, inching closer to her. She gives him a sly smile, knowing exactly what he’s trying to tell her, and closes the gap.
He pulls away again after finding his hands under her top, and points to the back. She shakes her head, smiling.
“Come on, you missed me too much to say no.”
. . .
Maybe he should say something to his friends to stop them from harassing her.
But he’s glued to the spot, watching as Topper taunts her.
“You lied to me,” Topper pouts, “The Aglio Olio isn’t that good.”
She looks at Rafe, hoping, wanting, longing for him to say something. Anything.
He stays shut, scanning the menu.
“Sorry. Would you like to order anything else?” She sighs, spelling a big ‘fuck you’ on the top of her notepad.
“Do you come with the menu?”
She looks at Rafe again, waiting.
Say something. Please.
She smiles, “I do.”
Topper smiles and the other coos. (Y/N) watches as Rafe’s jaw tightens, and she goes back to her dirty work.
Two can play this game, Cameron.
“Give me your best food, babe,” Topper smiles, and shuts the menu. “Anyone else? Rafe? What do you want to eat?”
She waits. Say something about us, Rafe, please.
“Can we change for another server—” he says, and raises his hand up. “Hey, yo, you, yeah, you the manager?”
Logan gives (Y/N) a warning look before putting on a smile for Rafe, “Yes, sir, is there anything I can do?”
“Can you call someone else to take our order?”
This is way too far. He’s taking this way too far—
“Did our (Y/N) say something?” Logan asks, still smiling. She knows he’s seething inside, and she hates Rafe for putting her in this position.
“No. I just love for a better view.”
That feels like a hard smack across the face. Her throat starts burning, and she can feel her tears slowly appearing.
“That’s no problem, sir, I’ll get you another server—” Logan looks around, “Kate! Yes, c’mere.”
(Y/N) looks at Rafe again. His eyes meet hers, but there’s nothing behind his gaze.
Coward.
She reaches for the cold water on the table, her head’s so light she can literally faint, and splashes the brunette boy so quick that he stands up immediately.
“Asshole,” she states, and turns to Logan. “I fucking quit!”
. . .
Rafe Cameron is 100% an asshole.
She used to think of so many counterattacks to that statement, but there’s zero now.
She hates Rafe Cameron will all her heart, and wishes to never see him again.
He tried contacting her a few times over the week, to which she ignored heavily. She never thought he would stoop so low to preserve his title as the ‘Kook prince’.
To hell with that.
She would never treat him like that, and she’s just so clueless as to why he said all those mean words to her.
He kissed her on the lips, pulling her close. “My baby. So fucking perfect.”
(Y/N) grinded against him, hearing his soft whimpers, and laughed. She watched the clock ticking, and sighed.
“Forty minutes until I’m off to work.”
Rafe groaned, “Stop talking about work. Work with me.”
“As what, idiot?” She laughed, gazing at him lazily. “As a fuckbuddy?”
He sat up straighter, his face contorting in anger. “You are not my fuckbuddy, okay? Stop saying that. God, I will never do that you.”
She smiled, and leaned to kiss him against his chest. She trailed her lips up to his neck, and stopped right behind his ear. He shivered, biting his lips.
“And I’ll make you mind one day, (Y/N), I will,” he whispered.
Now that’s the biggest lie of the century. She gets it now;
The night dates in the most unknown places, like a fancy restaurant in a fucking town 2 islands away from Obx. Not wanting to hold hands or to be posted on her Instagram.
Why had she been so stupid?
“Fuck,” she groans, laying her back against the pillow.
Rafe Cameron is embarrassed to be seen with her. Something like that.
All the sweet things he would say to her in bed is nothing but a tactic to get into her pants. And she allowed him. God.
“You’re a stupid fuck, (Y/N),” she cries, and bites her lips. And she thought he would be the one—
Riiing! Riiing!
“Stop calling me!” She yells first thing when she picks up the phone, trying to stop her voice from cracking. Like always, she failed.
“Yo? You good?” JJ’s voice rang through the phone, a hint of worry in his voice. “I can call you another—”
“No! No, J, it’s fine, I thought you’re someone else,” she sighs. “What’s up?”
“Wanna come down to the beach with me tomorrow?”
“And do what?” She sighs. She doesn’t feel like swimming in the water, or watch JJ swim, or search for dolphins (JJ told her before that there’s dolphins in Obx), or anything, really.
She wants to sleep.
“Surfing,” he answers, like it’s a fact. “Come on, you got the whole summer to practice surfing. Let’s start with asking the hottest guy in Obx to coach you.”
(Y/N) slapped him in the face, giggling ferociously. He picked her up, twirling her around, and when she least expected it, he jumped into the water with her in his arms.
They resurfaced, still in a laughing fit.
“God, Rafe, you’re an asshole,” she laughed, pushing his chest.
“And the hottest guy in Obx.”
She bites her lips, thinking of the memory, and clears her throat. “Maybe not surfing, J, but I’ll come down anyways.”
“Okay to me,” he says, and (Y/N) can imagine a smile playing on his lips. “Goodnight, (Y/N).”
“Night, J.”
She sighs, and shuts her phone off.
Whatever Rafe did to her disappears into thin air when she arrives at the beach and see JJ with two surfboards planted in the sand.
He grins at her when she comes close, “There you are. Thought you bailed on me.”
She rolls her eyes, “I don’t want to surf, J.”
“Since when?”
She groans, “Like. Right now.”
“Nah, come on.”
Maybe JJ’s right. She gives him a nudge every time he tries to hold her, but he’s patient. He waits until she’s more comfortable before helping her up on her board, and when she topples over from the small wave, he lets out the biggest laugh.
And she completely forgets about the fight with Rafe for the whole hour.
“God. You’re a dick.”
JJ smiles, stabilising her board again. “Try again. You can call me a dick once you will not fall over a small wave.”
And she tries again.
By the time the sun sets they were laying right next to each other, just admiring each other’s presence and not saying anything.
She likes it like this. No secrets.
“(Y/N)?”
She hums in response, leaning on her elbows for support.
“You deserve someone a lot more better than Rafe.”
“Don’t talk about him,” she sighs, and closes her eyes.
When (Y/N) told the pogues about Rafe the night after the incidence, they were all fuming with anger and hatred towards the brunette boy. But (Y/N) doesn’t have an ounce of hate in her for him, even after all the hurtful things he said to her.
What an idiot.
“I can’t watch you get hurt again,” JJ says. “I care about you.”
She looks him properly now, watching as the golden light illuminates his handsome face. “I know, J.”
They lay in silence again, staring at the blue landscape of nothingness.
“There’s someone out there who will treat you better.”
She looks at him again. No. No.
“Yeah?” She laughs, trying to give him the idea to stop right now and not make it any complicated for her. She loves him, more than anything in the world, but not in the way she feels for Rafe.
He’s her Laurie to Jo March. Nothing more but a best friend.
He scoots closer, feeling her warmth. “Yeah. Look around, (Y/N).”
She inches away, “J, I’m not looking for anyone. You know that.”
“Except for Rafe,” he mumbles. “Is that right?”
“He’s different.”
“Why, (Y/N)? He treats you like shit, is embarrassed to be seen with you—”
“Okay, J, fuck! I get it, okay? But I’m not looking for anyone. I’m just not. Leave me alone!” She groans, throwing her arms into the air exasperatedly. She doesn’t need another boy in her life right now.
JJ’s right. Except for Rafe.
“I’m leaving,” she says, grabbing her tote bag and stuffing all her belongings. “This is a mistake.”
“(Y/N), wait—” he tries to hold her, but she flinches away. He crosses his arms, “Let me drive you home at least.”
“I can walk.”
“It’s getting darker. Come on, don’t make this any harder for me.”
“A drive back home, and that’s it, J,” she warns, and sets for the black bike a distance away.
The ride towards her small home takes a few minutes on the bike, and all the time she’s sitting behind JJ with her arms placed on his shoulders for balance, they didn’t exchange any words. There’s an obvious awkward dome between the two of them.
“I’m sorry, J,” she sighs, stepping away from the bike and handing him the helmet. “I didn’t mean to lash out on you.”
He smiles grimly, not saying anything.
The engine roars back to life, and he looks at her again; standing with her hair slowly drying and her shirt still sticking to her body. He looks away.
“J?” She calls, placing her hands over his. He raises his brows at her, waiting.
She places a soft kiss against his lips, so subtle yet meaningful to him, and pulls away after a few seconds. She rubs his cheeks slowly, and gives him another kiss on the cheeks.
“Sorry, J,” she whispers.
JJ smiles softly, and runs his thumb over her cheeks.
Maybe in another lifetime.
“(Y/N)?”
Their heads turn towards the voice behind her figure, and (Y/N) swears her heart stops.
Rafe looks at her and back to JJ, his mind connecting the puzzle, and he nods.
“Wait, Rafe!”
JJ tugs on her wrist, his eyes begging. “Leave with me. Come on.”
She looks at JJ, and then back to Rafe, and she hopes for some kind of a way to get out of this. She groans, and pulls her hands away. “Go, J. I don’t need you.”
And that’s enough to hurt the blonde boy.
“Rafe!” She yells after the boy walking to his jeep, but he continues to walk, ignoring her.
She lurches forward and grab his shoulders, turning him to face her. She looks into his eyes, looking for any sign of love for her.
“Rafe, it’s not what you think.”
“Yeah? Were you trying to give him a CPR or something?”
She holds him in her hands again, “No, Rafe, I swear. I was just. . .”
But there’s no proper way to explain why she had kissed JJ. Was it because she feel bad? But why would she kissed him?
“Yeah,” he nods, prying his hands away.
A sudden wave of anger courses through her, because the boy who had hurt her did not just make this look like it’s her entire fault. She pushes him on the chest, and his back hit the car door.
“What the fuck?” He yells, glaring at her.
“So what? You’re making me look like the fucking bad guy now? After all the shit you said to me in the restaurant?
He laughs dryly, “Of course you would point this back at me. Hey, hey, look—” he cups her face, “At least I didn’t kiss anyone.”
She pushes him away, “It doesn’t mean anything! And you’re not my fucking boyfriend.”
He licks his lips, “Yeah. So let me go.”
She pulls him to her again, “Don’t fucking run away from me like this! You didn’t even apologise!”
“Because you won’t pick up my calls!” He yells back, throwing his arms into the air. “You want to fuck JJ fucking Maybank? Then go.”
“Maybe I do want to fuck JJ, Rafe, because at least he’s real. This whole thing you’re showing to people. . . that’s not you. Fuck you.”
“Yeah?” He taunts, staring at her left hand placed directly on his chest. “Then fuck him. You don’t need me.”
“I don’t.”
“Yeah,” he laughs, watching as her chest heave. “I can go to Kie too, you know, to make this even.”
“Yeah? Would you embarrass her in front of your friends too?”
He shrugs, “No.”
She grits her teeth, knowing that he’s just trying to get under her skin.
“I hate you.”
He turns her over, so she’s facing him, and inches closer to her ears. “You don’t.”
“I do.”
He laughs again, pressing himself against her, and Rafe blames the heat of North Carolina in mid July for the sudden tingling in his stomach.
“I hate that stupid smirk on your face right now, and I’ll do anything to wipe them off.”
He presses a soft kiss against her cheeks, feeling her brush against him, and let out a soft whimper. “Okay.”
After 2 weeks of not seeing her, all he wanted was to talk to her at her house, after all the calls that she didn’t pick up. But when he waited for her to come back from God knows where and saw him getting off JJ’s bike, he lets the cold side of him take over.
He lets her go, sighing. “I’ll just go. This is a waste of time. You’re clearly not thinking about me.”
(Y/N) bites her lips, because a part of her wants him to stay, and they can kiss each other again, but another part of her wants him to go and leave her alone.
“Go.”
He hesitates, and nods. The jeep speeds away, leaving (Y/N) alone in her front step, thinking about what she had just done.
She hurt JJ, who wanted nothing but the best of her, and she just lost Rafe. She’s as good as alone in this world, and she’s not sure what to do anymore. She wishes she never let her temper got ahold of her, but it’s too late.
She just wants to sleep it off right now.
-
@okayshoto @joselyn001 @onceuponateenagetrash @dyingsleeping @iwannabeapogue @meaganjm @rafesobxs @flossy2929 @unfortunatekiwitrash @scottybitch @asimpwriter @amaya124 @tommy-tommo @thatshithurted8 @fallincindy @marvelwhor3 @rafeswh0ree @kookap @supernaturallydc-blog @blank-velvet @alaniskauany @kiiim8 @witchywrter @kaitlyn2907 @heyimflo @overcookedpastasause @tsukkiswifeey @spidey-d00d @anonymousobxfan @gotmeinloveagain @chicagoblackhawkslover96 @lexi-writes @classydragonthingknight @belongtoyou-u @badbussylol @savannah-elliott @angelreyesgirl100 @haterpenny @beehappyyy @alwaysclassyeagle @maybankslut @kayleea122 @clearbolts @lovelyxtom @christianaevans @jemimah-b99 @opierdalacz @dangerdolns @wildflowerliv @classygirlything21 @pogueslandia @alwaysclassyeagle @rottenstyx
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spencersmagic · 3 years
Text
a knife twists at the thought - SR
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Prompt: a knife twists at the thought that i should fall short of the mark - Arctic Monkeys
Summary: Spencer is new to this, and the poor boy is terrified
Couple: Fem! Reader x Spencer Reid (i picture season 2/3 Spencer but y’all do you)
Category: angst
Word count: 3086 words
Warnings: general criminal minds stuff, mentions and descriptions of torture, descriptions of loss, HAPPY ENDING!!, my 3am writing, tooth rotting love, uhmm spoilers for Orwell’s 1984 (if anybody hasn’t read it), humiliation, Spencer crying and breaking my heart (lmk if you need anything warned or trigger tagged).
A/N This is very loosely based on 2x15 (VERY LOOSELY). I’m quite proud of this one :)
masterlist // 505 series taglist
*****
They say you never see it coming.
When a tragedy occurs, and someone’s life is turned upside down forever, they never see it coming. It just... hits them. Like an oncoming car ramming into a bystander who was just in the wrong place at the wrong time.
No one has time to prepare. In our time-starved lives, there is no place for such a warning.
One day, you just wake up. And they’re not next to you. They’ve disappeared, leaving the stickiest, most unforgettable parts of themselves behind for others to grieve to: the smell of their shampoo in the pillows they used to share, the seconds just as you wake when you still feel like you have them - only to gain full consciousness and realise they left you behind - even the fucking jars, which never seem to be open because he’s just not there to do it.
And you feel your heart breaking all over again as your soul sticks to the parts that couldn’t be erased with the rest of him as he left. Because you needed him, you had him, and now he’s gone. No warning, no letter, no signs which could’ve helped you foresee such a tragedy, because how could he? He didn’t disappear on purpose.
She doesn’t understand why he's so absent. So unequivocally missing. And the person she would turn to to ask these riddled questions isn’t there to answer. Because he’s gone.
But they’re not there yet.
And she feels so close to that feeling - the helplessness, the pain, the empty cups next to her bed because he always carried them to the sink when she was finished with her tea the mornings of those rare days they got to sleep in. Those days when they had time. She can practically touch, with the tip of her fingertips, the waves of pain that would surge over her if he was gone for one more fucking minute.
She has to remind herself, over and over again, like a mantra. He’s not gone yet.
The “yet” at the end of her mantra just breaks her all over again.
She was always the one to tell Spencer “if you worry before something happens, in case it goes wrong, and then it does, you’ve managed to suffer twice through something painful for absolutely no reason”. It usually worked. Needless to say, she felt like a hypocrite right about now.
Because Spencer is gone. And she doesn’t know how to bring him back.
She knows only to watch the monitor, never once blinking, taking in everything that happened in that damned livestream - every word, every sound, every reference. She can only try to hear anything over the whimpers and sobs her love was letting out as he’s tortured by that man. She can only hear the cracks of his knuckles against Spencers soft skin, the same soft skin she had kissed mere hours ago before telling him to “be careful”. Her own way of saying the three little words the couple was too young to hear. She can only see his lips parting, sobs rumbling out of his body as the unsub abuses his frame over and over again - same lips which had kissed her forehead before telling her “i always am”.
Then again, she isn’t sure if its his voice which is filling her head with painful sounds or if her mind is playing tricks on her, memorising the horrifying vibrations coming from his chest for her to ever consider anything else. She hasn’t stopped hearing him since she turned on that damned computer.
She isn’t sure she’ll ever stop hearing it.
**
As a man of great intellect, Spencer always recurred to knowledge to understand difficult occurrences in his life. Burying himself in textbooks, novels, poems, and even music to understand pain, and himself having a life filled with it, he was an incredibly knowledgeable man.
He knew much. But right now, he only knew one thing.
In Orwells’ 1984, as Winston was being tortured (much like Spencer is right now), Orwell described the following:
“Never, for any reason on earth, could you wish for an increase of pain. Of pain you could only wish one thing: that it should stop. Nothing in the world was so bad as physical pain. In the face of pain there are no heroes, no heroes”.
And, as a man who had acquired most of his intellect by immersing himself in trivial content in the face of pain, he found himself doing the same thing as the unsub hurt him over and over again, each blow seemingly more painful than the last. As his skin bruised, a causality of his abusers torment, he analysed the seemingly logical quote.
It must depend on the person, he was sure. In fact, a number of factors must be taken into consideration at this statement. For starters, Winston lives in a society incapable of any human feelings. There is only dominance, and those who attempt, in vain, to challenge it. Surely, if he had felt happiness, like the one you feel when the first day of spring rolls around, or like the one that creeps up on you as you look into the eyes of your loved one, surely, he would understand that some things can outweigh pain.
Love.
If Spencer’s mind could make sense of what he was feeling right now, he would understand, something he would figure of were he to leave this damned place, that he was thankful to the Gods, were there any, for having the unsub kidnap him and not Y/N.
Winston hadn’t understood emotional pain because emotions weren’t dealt with regularly. They were discouraged. That’s why he believed that there are no heroes in the face of pain. Because he doesn’t understand emotional pain.
He knew he was suffering. He also knew that Y/N was at the other side of the blinking camera suffering more than he could ever imagine.
**
They say emotional pain lasts 12 minutes. Anything one feels after this would be the aftermath of the cause of the pain in question. Pure emotional pain, the one you practically feel in your chest, the one that says “i can’t think, feel or be. not until this feeling dissipates”.
She had learned this from Spencer.
And she wished it were true. As she watched that damned monitor, she wished that all the venom the unsub was spewing at Spencer, all the verbal abuse, was long forgotten. She wished he could only feel the physical pain. Because the mind is incredibly stronger than the body - it could keep him awake, alive, for just enough time for the team to rescue him.
The entire team had huddled around the monitor around her. She was painfully aware that other people were seeing this. Which meant it wasn’t her imagination. It wasn’t another one of those damned dreams she would have when she slept a little too far away from Spencer’s touch.
They had only been together for two months, but his touch was all that could get her to fall asleep.
She jolted as the unsub landed another slap on Spencer’s cheek, swiftly grabbing his hair for him to look into the camera. He had a cut above his right cheek, just where she would kiss him in the mornings, and bruises all over his neck, jaw and left eye.
“Say hi to your team!” he mocked Spencer, chuckling darkly as he moved his almost lifeless body around for the team to watch in horror. Spencer let out a heartbreaking sob, feeling so vulnerable.
“Why don’t we make this interesting?” he jumped, as if he had gotten an idea. The unsub reached behind himself to grab a pistol, clicking off the magazine safety to put one bullet in one of the eight slots, leaving the other seven free. He pointed it at Spencer’s temple.
Her entire body shook the thought of seeing Spencer’s lifeless body, held up only by the ropes and that sick man’s grip around his curls. The same curls she grabbed as she kissed his face when she wanted his attention.
“I’m going to ask you some questions...” he said, voice dripping with sickening sweetness as he turned the roulette, “and if i don’t like your answer i’ll pull the trigger! Let God decide what I do with you. Sounds good?”. He wanted to humiliate Spencer.
However, Spencer made the mistake of not answering him. He was quickly reminded as the barrel of the gun pointed right between his eyes, pulling the trigger, a loud bang! sound expanding through the barn.
“I asked you a question!” he suddenly yelled into Spencer’s face.
“Y-yes, Sir” he whimpered, shaking at the ease at which the man pulled the trigger.
“Good, you’re learning”.
**
She experienced it by bits. Hotch’s hoarse voice. “Talk to me Garcia”. “We’ve got coordinates”. Everybody rushing to the SUVs. Tripping over her own feet on the way to the car. Morgan’s voice. The iPad, which still carried Spencer’s whimpers and the man mocking tone.
“I’ve got your diary, Spence” his sing-song voice didn’t match the disgusting man she was looking at. Nothing made sense.
“And I wanna know why...” he drew out the ‘y’ as he looked for something between the worn pages between his hands.
Of course she knew Spencer owned a diary. But she was mature enough to keep her hands to herself and her eyes on her own pages as he wrote on his, eyebrows creasing as he recalled all which he had experienced during the day. His face would twitch slightly at the memories, both good and bad, as he basically described his day word by word.
“...why did you wait until you were 24 to lose your virginity?” he asked in a clear attempt to humiliate and ridicule Spencer in front of his team.
“I-I didn't-” he could barely finish a word before a sob wrecking through his body at the humiliation, chest rumbling and voice wavering. “I didn’t want to lose it before, i w-wasn’t in a hurry” he rushed out. The man brought the pistol to his own chin, tapping it as he thought. “Hmm... I’m satisfied with your answer. Let’s dig deeper, shall we?” he asked as he went back into the pages.
“ooh! This one is new” that sick bastard was having fun with this, completely unaware that the team was less than 5 minutes away from their location.
“Care to read what you wrote three days ago? Right here” he turned the pages so Spencer could read them, though he was painfully aware of that entry he was talking about. His body shook violently. “P-please. D-don’t ma-make me do t-this” he whimpered, body feeling defeated.
“Wrong answer” the unsub said before pointing a gun at him and pulling the trigger.
A shriek was heard from the iPad. The SUV went silent.
“He’s alive” she whispered, unable to speak up. “He-” she swallowed. “He’s alive. We’re not there, yet” her mantra became a reminder that she hadn’t been quick enough to help him. She had the tools to save him. Every second she had the knowledge to save him and didn’t was another second she remained impotent at the risk of losing the love of her life.
Spencer’s voice spoke from the iPad.
“C-can you at-at leas-st turn off t-the ca-amera?” he said between sobs.
And it hit her.
What hurt him the most wasn’t the memories he had to relieve, but the fact that the rest of the team would have to hear his most intimate thoughts. His deepest secrets.
He could bare the pain. The humiliation? That broke him.
“Aww” the unsub chuckled mockingly, “are you embarrassed?” he said, slouching down to look into his eyes. “Well too fucking bad!” he screamed into his face, spitting with every word he spewed at him. Spencer’s sobs got louder.
“O-okay okay!” Spencer caved, accepting the journal that got shoved into his face.
“Read, pretty boy” the unsub sang. That son of a bitch was having fun.
“We’re two minutes away, Y/N” Hotch said. Maybe it was he sobs, which were barely audible to herself, having accepted them as second nature after all the heartbreak she was experiencing, but Hotch needed her to be okay.
His own heart thumped into his chest, feeling as helpless as he’d ever felt. Seeing a member of his team - someone he was supposed to take care of, someone he was supposed to keep safe - was sobbing as he was physically and emotionally tortured. But he was painfully aware of the feelings Y/N was experiencing. The sheer fear that was running down her veins at the idea of them running out of time.
After a few sobs, Spencer started reading, interrupting himself occasionally with his whimpers:
“It’s been three months. Today, three months, seven hours and forty-six minutes ago, she did what I didn’t have the courage to do. She asked me out. “I’ve been wanting to ask you pretty much since the day i met you” she had said. Those words keep ringing in my head like a beautifully written symphony, intrinsically designed to make me face my deepest fears. Opening my scars one by one, dissecting them and reaching the simple conclusion that i was a coward.
She didn’t say it, but what she meant was “i’ve been waiting for you to do it, but you never did, so i had to”. We wasted time - a time so precious and sacred - because i was a coward.
I’ve never felt like this before. I never understood a love so deep as to move something so stubborn as the human spirit. I’ve read textbook after textbook, and novel after novel, and still I’ve never learned more than with her. But I was a coward. And i wasted her time. I fear that I still am.
A knife twists at the thought that i should fall short of the mark. It’s impossible for me to ever be enough for her”.
Her heart broke at this confession. Even worse at the thought that he wouldn’t’ve told her, instead inhaling fear and exhaling rejection at every breath he took next to her.
“We’re here” she heard Hotch, looking at her. She grabbed a bottle of water and dropped the iPad, not hearing the teams objections at the lack of vest and preparation and ran into the barn.
She isn’t sure if she’ll ever stop hearing his whimpers. As she runs closer, she hears them louder and louder, decorated with sobs and cries, and small, meaningless replies to his abusers’ mocking words.
She kicked the door down, the loud bang booming across the room, only helping in raising Spencer’s sobs as he feared the sound had been the result of a certain trigger being pulled. As she looks at him, she realises just how much pain he’s been put through.
She remembers Orwells words, much like how Spencer had remembered them mere hours ago. And disagrees, wishing over and over, praying to the Gods that she would be the victim of such atrocious abuse. She wished she could take his pain. Morgan joined her at her side mere seconds later, yelling. “FBI! Put the gun down!”.
Spencer used the last bit of energy to lunge forward, hitting the unsubs stomach with his head, successfully getting him on the floor for Morgan to apprehend. Y/N rushed to Spencer’s side, untying him, as his now nonexistent sobs grew louder and louder, not only at the prospect of getting out of that horrible place alive, but also at the knowledge that Y/N had heard what he had so dreadfully recited.
Spencer collapsed into her arms, crying into her in the same way she was crying into him, and she wondered just how to take away all his pain. So they cried into each other, desperately grasping each others hair, skin, clothes, anything that would make them feel like they wouldn’t have to spend another damned second without the company of each other.
Spencer was the first to break the silence.
“I need-” he stopped, coughing. She reached for the bottle of water she had brought with her because she knew he would need it. She always knew what he needed.
He chugged it desperately, stray drops falling down his chin at his eagerness. He took a deep breath trying to steady his lungs.
“I need to get out of here” he choked out.
She grabbed him under the shoulders, careful not to hurt him - not being successful, realising that there wasn’t much of him the man hadn’t hurt. Y/N pulled him out, sitting down on the grass with him. Their legs intertwined, pulling each other impossibly closer. They kissed, over and over again. Not as an act of any sexual relevance, but as a reminder that they had each other in any way, shape or form. That they weren’t out of time.
The team was certain they would stay there, never letting each other go for another minute.
After what felt like seconds in their time-starved little world, she broke the silence, which had only been filled with their own cries and occasional sobs.
“Spence” she grabbed his chin to look into his eyes. They were dull, red and hooded. He was exhausted. “Mhmm?” he let out, looking into hers. She was his solace.
“How could you ever think you were anything but completely and unequivocally enough?” she whispered the words he dreaded.
But as Spencer looked into her eyes he knew, better than he had ever known anything, that he was enough. And she was enough. He realised that which she had known for the past three months (possibly longer). They fit like two marvellous puzzle pieces.
Her hands grabbed his cheeks slowly, as to not hurt or startle him, pulling his forehead into hers. “Baby, I can’t imagine anybody else waking up to me every morning. You’re so much more than enough”, she planted a small kiss on his forehead before resuming her position. “I’ll remind you every day of the rest of my life if that’s what it takes for you to believe it”.
And with their eyes closed, foreheads and noses pressed together and legs tangled between each other, pulling each other close, closer - around grass and voices and his abuser pressed into the hood of a police car, they only felt each other. With their shaky breaths, even shakier voices, fearing any words that would leave them in case they triggered a cascade of tears down their oh so vulnerable cheeks, they were more than enough.
***
I hope y’all liked it!! Feel free to let me know by liking, reblogging, or sending me a message :) 
super cool kid taglist: @lady-anon-x​ @spencerreid-mgg​​ @eoupe​ @inlovewithbabygirl​ @galaxydefenderjulia​ @username2002​
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bruhstories · 3 years
Text
Personal Demon
Summary: Because of a mistake, you're assigned a devil instead of an angel. Pairing: Demon!Eren Jaeger x Fem!Reader Warnings & Conent: oh boy, here we go - language, mentions of suicide, mentions of self harm, mentions of rape, fingering, unprotexted sex, alcohol consumption, mentions of drug abuse, mentions of reader in an asylum, sliiiiight dumbification of reader, slight corruption of reader, Eren's a little shit Word Count: 3.9 k
A/N: So I wrote this in, like, 3-4 days because I felt like it's pretty bad but not bad enough not to post it. I hope you still enjoy it, though!
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You always felt it — breathing in your nape, moving in the corner of your room at night, whispering things you shouldn't dare think about. Your own personal demon. Most of the time you did a good job at ignoring it. Most of the time you abused substances to make it go away, at least for a minute. With the puff of weed or a bottle of alcohol, it stayed away, only watching from afar and never involving itself with you. Most of the time.
Keys clung in your hands, door shutting behind as you walked into your apartment, fingers wrapped around your grocery bags. Yet another night of drinking the voice away.
"Not today, Satan." You hummed, popping open a bottle of gin, nose scrunching at the bitter taste.
"I keep telling you, the easiest way to get rid of me would be to kill yourself." It spoke, this time outside of your head.
"And I keep telling you to stay the fuck away from me." You growled back.
"We both know that's not possible."
Another sip and you put the bottle down, hands digging inside the bag for a snack.
"You're gonna need something stronger than that."
There it was, the bar of chocolate you so eagerly starved for. The TV suddenly turned on. It was craving entertainment.
"Anything unusual happened today?"
No, it was craving attention and you were not about to give it any. You put the groceries inside the fridge and grabbed the bottle, plopping on the couch.
"How long are you going to pretend I'm not here?"
"As long as I need." You snapped back, eyes glued to the TV.
"Well, that didn't last long." It laughed. "Come on, Y/N, we've been together for, what, 24 years?"
"Can you just shut up? Disappear? Crawl back to Hell?"
"Nope. Waaaaait, I know why you've got your panties in a twist. It's because that Jean guy you like hooked up with Mikasa, right?"
It was impossible to deal with. Every single second, it was there. Since you've been born, it was there, always watching, always following you, always. You tried to go to a priest, a monk, anything, but nothing helped. The angel that was supposed to guide you happened to be a demon and there was nothing you could do about it. But you were not going to give it the satisfaction of ending your pathetic life, no matter how much you wanted to, because despite being a demon, it still had to keep you alive until your time came. It, however, did like to push you over the edge, push you until you grabbed a knife and slit your wrists, only for the knife to get shoved by some invisible force before you could finish the job. It tormented you and it loved it.
"I told you, not today, Satan."
"Ugh, my name's-"
"I don't care." Your head snapped into the direction of the voice, only to be met with a wall. "Let's face it, we shouldn't have been in this situation, so why don't you shut your mouth up and let me get on with my life?"
"What life?" It laughed and you could already picture the sneer on its face, flashing you fangs and a forked tongue. "That's not even what I look like."
"Get out of my head!" You screamed before grabbing the bottle and emptying half of its contents.
"Careful, Y/N, the neighbours might call the police and you don't want to end up like last time, do you?"
Last time... you were but a child, throwing plates at the wall only to make it stop talking when your parents admitted you to an asylum. You had to live with it for half a year before they let you out.
"Please, please stay out of my head." Tears pooled at your eyes as you clutched the bottle at your chest.
"Now why would I stay out when it's just so much fun in you?"
"God, I hate you so much!"
"Me or beardy up there? I couldn't quite get it." It laughed again, laughing at your damn misery as you got up from the couch and left the apartment.
The alcohol already made its way to your brain when you reached the ground floor of the building. Rain poured outside but you didn't care, you just ran as far away from it as possible and for the first time in years, it didn't follow you. Grateful and content, you slowed down, admiring the beauty of the city which you ignored because of the voice inside of your head. The smell of rain, the colourful buildings, the empty streets, everything felt new and refreshing, and you took it all in. Time seemed to slow down without itconstantly nagging in the back of your mind and you realised you were pretty far away from your home, an area unknown to you. Still, you knew how to get back, you hoped, but when you turned around, a man pushed you into an alleyway.
"Satan?" You whispered, dizzy from the lingering gin and smell of rain. The man pinned you to a wall and finally you were beginning to realise what was happening.
"Call me whatever you want, baby, just keep that pretty voice down." His hand moved up your thigh and panic seeped through your veins. "We don't want to draw any attention, now, do we?" He kissed your neck and you froze on the spot, eyes widening in fear and body shivering.
"L-let go of me!" You managed, the alcohol numbing your arms, rendering you unable to push the stranger away.
"Shhh, don't fight it." The man squeezed your arms, his fingers bruising the soft skin. Anger, sadness and pain coiled together in your chest and you couldn't breathe anymore. Oh, how you wished you never left your flat, how you wished you stayed back and listened to itconstantly yapping, like a maggot crawling into your brain. "Aren't you a pretty one?" He cooed, his hand travelling lower, lower, to the point where tears started rolling down your cheeks, mixing with the snot and rain on your face.
And then it happened — in the blink of an eye, your assailant was thrown against the other wall by the too familiar invisible force as you sank to the ground, eyes puffy and red, legs trembling.
"The fuck? What are you?" The man hissed at you, his hands holding his abdomen.
"I'm the devil." It spoke, voice inhuman and perilous, and you could only sneer at him. For the first time you were happy it was there. Sick, twisted thoughts invaded your mind and you wanted to watch him suffer, and itknew. It knew, because the devil was always in your head.
"You crazy bitch!" The assailant, now helpless and overpowered, did not know about your own personal demon, and he tried to get up, tried to leap forward at you and strangle the last bit of air out of your lungs, but he couldn't. Somethingwas holding him back.
"You want him dead?" It asked, but you know the devil took more pleasure in inflicting pain rather than swiftly killing.
"No." You grinned, eyes dark and dangerous. "I want him to suffer."
"That's my girl."
Blood-curling screams echoed in the alleyway. You didn't know what it was doing to him, but you knew for a fact that you were enjoying the sounds that came out of your attacker. His wrists contorted in a way you didn't think was possible, and the melody of broken bones reminded you that what was happening was wrong. For a moment, your brain was rational, telling you that it should stop, that you should both just leave and forget this ever happened. But... it also felt good, it felt like you've just been reborn, discovering a deeply buried part of you that ached to be exposed. Then, his legs twisted and the man winced in pain, so much pain, and your heart fluttered in your chest.
"More?" It asked and you nodded.
"More."
His arms looped, like a deformed puppet loosely strung, and it made him dance in the rain until his body gave up from fatigue.
"Aw, I was really hoping he'd be a feisty one." It mused, and you also clicked your tongue in disappointment. Before you left, you gave your assailant a good kick in the stomach, your boot stomping on his face with so much anger and force that what remained was unrecognisable.
Wet clothes piled on the floor, you wrapped your naked body in a blanket to warm yourself up. What just happened? What did you do? Why did you allow it to happen and more importantly, why did you love every minute of it? The questions jogged in your fuzzy brain, as you slowly sobered up.
"Why did I enjoy it, Satan?" You asked, lips quivering.
"I told you, my name's not Satan, it's-"
"Eren, I know. I remember." You could feel it quirk a brow, surprised and impressed by its name rolling down your tongue so naturally. "Why did I enjoy it? It's wrong and disgusting."
"Do you remember what happens when you say my name?" It sounded almost concerned.
"You physically manifest, I know. Now answer my fuckingquestion."
"What do you want me to say?" Itasked, fragments of muscle, skin and silk pulling together from thin air. First, its legs. Then, its upper body, draped in a charcoal-black robe. "That you're as sadistic as I am? Maybe it wasn't a mistake that you have a demon, not an angel." And finally, its face materialised in front of you — long dark brown hair falling down his shoulders and eyes so green, it felt like a forest was in them. It looked almost human, the hooked nose, the elongated ears, the deeply sunken emeralds and jagged mouth betraying its true nature.
"I thought you'd have fangs." Was your only response at the scene unfolding in front of you, blanket clutched at your chest. Any normal person would shudder at the demonic sight of Eren appearing in front of them, but to you, it felt comforting to finally assign a face to the voice you so desperately tried to ignore.
"And I thought you wanted to get rid of me." It scoffed, its facial features changing, becoming softer and resembling a human man, but those eyes didn't change an ounce.
"I don't know what I want anymore. If it weren't for you, I would've been raped and dead, probably."
"Just embrace it, Y/N. Just let go of that annoying voice in your head that tells you it's wrong." He encouraged. "There's no such thing as good or bad, right or wrong. It's just surviving, adapting or dying."
Eren looked unbelievably human and incredibly handsome in the dim light of your living room lamp. Maybe it was the alcohol that hasn't left your body yet, or maybe it was the fact that he saved you, again, but the truth was that the devil in your house was making you feel something you couldn't even feel for Jean — and you thought you were in love with Jean.
"Alright, let's pretend for a moment that I give into temptation." Your eyes found his and you felt hypnotised, the rational part of your brain slowly overshadowed by your instincts and feelings. "What then? Do you leave me alone? Do you go back to hell? Do Igo to hell?"
"Oh, I wouldn't call it hell. More like a demonic paradise." He shrugged, eyes bored and blank, devout of any emotion. You leaned forward trying to search for something in his darkened orbs.
"Why are you being nice to me? You're supposed to save me from death, not rape."
He clicked his tongue, your question drilling into his brain, repeating itself over and over again. Why did he save you? It's not like he cared, he only did his job, right? Right?
Wrong.
The demon you grew up with, the demon who tormented you, the demon who tried so desperately to ruin your life did, in fact, give two shits about you and your pathetic existence. Just not in the way you thought.
"Let's just say no one gets to touch you but me." Eren closed the gap between you two, his nose almost grazing over yours. He was absolutely intoxicating and you always fought with the constant need to let him control you. After all, he was always with you, he saw you hit your lowest points, he saw the best of you, he saw your naked body, he saw everything, ergo you were his. Your head quickly turned to the side before you leaned back, exhaustion written all over your face as Eren clicked his tongue. The thing about demons was that they couldn't physically interfere without their human's consent, only using invisible force to stop you from dying and he was just so close.
"Ah, but you can't touch me, though." You trailed off, brow quirked at his narrowed eyes. You've done your homework, you knew what he needed, but still, that side of you tried to prevail over the side that craved his touch.
"Yet." Eren snapped back before your drifted to sleep.
Once again you dreamt of it him, his cock buried deep inside your needy cunt as you screamed his name over and over again while you came undone. When you jolted up from your sleep, he was there, watching you, like a predator stalking its prey. Normally he wouldn't be there, but since you called his name, Eren was glaring down at your helpless body, famished for something only you could give him.
"What's the time?" You groaned, fingers rubbing your eyelids.
"Three in the morning." He answered, eyes glued to you. "Bad dream?" The demon sneered. You knew he'd been in your head again, you knew those dreams existed for a reason.
"They wouldn't be bad if you'd just stay the fuck out of my mind." You hummed with a fake smile.
"Alright then, look me in the eye and tell me, reallytell me you want me to leave you alone." But you couldn't and he knew it. "Stop fighting it, Y/N. For two decades you kept trying. Maybe you should stop being stubborn and just give in." Eren shrugged, his voice tempting and you only wondered if that's how Eve felt when the snake tempted her. You weren't a Christian by any means, but you knew the story well enough to figure out the consequences.
"I have work tomorrow. Please let me sleep." You got up from the couch, blanket wrapped around your shoulders.
And that's when Eren reached his limits. He followed you into your bedroom, something knocking the wind out of you as you fell on the mattress. Somethingpulling the blanket off of you. Somethingtravelling down your arms, goosebumps dotting your skin as he stood in the doorway.
"I can't touch you, but I can do so many things to you." He inched closer, his figure imposing and dangerous and you could feel your core burning. "I can smell your arousal, Y/N. I know you want it. You just have to say it." Eren demanded and you hated that he was right. Slowly but surely, the battle in your heart and mind was coming to an end the more he got closer to the bed. "Say it."
You whined and writhed in pain and pleasure, and in the blink of an eye your life flashed before your eyes as you came to the conclusion that you've tried so hard to stay away from the demon, but either he was too persistent, or you were too weak. Or you just simply wanted him to ravage you and you were okay with that. Your hands stopped moving, your body stopped fighting.
"Do it..." You half-begged, judgement clouded, vision blurry. "Please, do it! Touch me, break me, fuck me, please! I need you, need to feel you..."
Like some sort of spell had just been lifted, Eren felt relieved. The sight of your sprawled body, combined with the lustful look in your lidded eyes only fed his hunger and he was famished. Calloused fingertips grazed over your knees, up your thighs, sending chills down your spine as you arched your back, pulling the demon closer to your face.
"Kiss me?" You asked, voice sweet and needy and he crushed his lips onto yours. They were surprisingly soft, tasting of whiskey and honey and the flavour lingered on your lips after he pulled away. Your body quivered under his touch, yearning for more, hands tugging at his silken robe to expose the chiselled chest. Eren pressed his forehead onto yours, hot breath tickling your cheeks.
"I'm going to ruin you, Y/N." He dug his teeth into your shoulder, the imprint burning into your skin, all the pent-up frustration slowly being released with each movement. He dragged one hand over your breasts before settling on one nipple, fingers pinching it to earn a reaction out of you. A whimper escaped from your lips as you pushed your chest upwards, wanting him closer than the laws of physics would allow. Your slender hands tangled in his locks as Eren left a trail of purple marks and bites all over your neck and shoulder.
"Fill me up, please..."
"Patience." He mused. "I've waited so many years for this, you can wait a few more minutes." Head buried between your tits, his hand travelled lower until it found your wet cunt. Fingers grazed over your folds before he drove his index into your soaked pussy and that's when you knew just how much you craved him. Your silken walls clenched around his curled-up finger and your neediness made him add another one, moans drilling through his eardrums, into his brain. "Fuck, you're so wet..." Eren hummed, vibrations tickling your skin. You couldn't form a coherent sentence even if your life counted on it. All you could think about was that if his fingers stretched you, his cock would tear your cunt apart — and you reallywanted to feel that. Fingernails dug into his back and he hissed, his tongue flicking your nipple and all the build-up was too much for you.
"Eren, please..." You mewled, your chest rising and falling with each breath, with each touch, each lick.
"You want me to fuck you? Want me to tear you apart?" The demon growled. His sudden change in tone only further added fuel to the fire inside your core and you eagerly nodded.
"Yes, God — yes! But Eren, I want to see you, not this pretty face you put on." You pleaded, eyes teary and demanding.
"No." He simply answered and that instantly made you jolt up, forcefully pushing him off of you.
"Are you trying to screw with my mind again? You've literally been with me for 24 years!" You shouted, and even Eren was slightly confused. "You tormented me for two decades, put me in an asylum, constantly stopped me from killing myself and now I can't even see the real you?" You threw your hands at him and he caught your wrists with ease. "You owe me at least that, Satan." Tears freely rolled down your face and you could feel his hot tongue lick the salty drops from your cheek. Your pain was his pleasure, he was a demon after all, the embodiment of all evil, but he decided you were corruptedenough to at least see his true colours, which you only managed to glance at.
"You're right, Y/N," Eren kissed your forehead and you couldn't even notice the manipulative hints in his voice, "you deserve at least this." He pulled back, and slowly his face distorted, allowing you to look at his disfigured mouth, elongated ears and abnormally long tongue.
"Thank you, thank you!" You beamed with bright eyes.
The woman who battled her demon? Gone.
In her place stood only a shell of a person, whose sole purpose was to get fucked by the demon in front of her. You feverishly parted his lips with your tongue, touch-starved and desperate, and Eren threw you onto the bed, robe pooled on the floor. And you were right, his cock wouldtear you apart by the looks of it. Before he could do anything, you spread your legs for him, like a good little slut, mouth agape and nothing but lust in your eyes. The sneer on his face was unlike anything you've seen before, and it both terrified and aroused you.
"Eager to please, aren't you?" He climbed onto the bed, the velvety tip of his cock barely touching your wet slit.
"I'm begging you, Eren, please fuck me!"
The demon scoffed at your pathetic words, but he couldn't deny how much he loved to hear your needy voice. You wouldn't have to know that, of course. He ever so slowly pushed the tip in between your folds, your cunt greedily taking it all in while you whimpered at the foreign sensation.
"Shhh," Eren cooed at you mockingly, "you love it, don't you?"
"Y-yes, please, d-deeper..."
Was it really you speaking or was this another one of his demonic tricks? And more importantly, did it even matter that he made you say those things when his cock felt just so good inside of you? Your legs wrapped around his waist, pulling him closer to you as Eren thrusts became harder. Your tits bounced with every move, pleasure engulfing both of you and you never knew demons fucked so raw.
"Fuck, you're so tight." He hissed into your ear, the compliment only making you clench your walls around his impossibly hard cock. "Such a good girl." Eren praised you, knowing perfectly well how much you lacked appreciation from your parents, knowing perfectly well how your childhood traumas and frustration only aided him. He was your demon, after all. When your only response was to roll your eyes at the back of your head like a possessed woman, Eren picked up the pace, his abnormal tongue licking at your collarbone.
"D-do you l-like it?" You asked, concerned that he might not be satisfied with you. He wouldn't be fucking you so hard if he didn't, but you were so brainwashed that nothing made sense anymore.
"I do, doll, now be a good whore and rub that clit, will you?" The demon urged and with a shaky hand you complied, the friction mixed with his thrusts sending you into a frenzy. You were close and he knew it.
"Oh, f-fuck! Eren!"
His cock hit that sweet spot and you were done for, your legs loosened around his waist, falling onto the bed, but he kept on fucking you.
"My turn." Eren growled, his hands lifting your hips like you were some sort of ragdoll between his fingers. Your vision blurred, every word you tried to utter lost in your throat the more he buried himself into you, yet somehow you still managed to clench your walls. With one final thrust you felt him spill his hot seed, cum dripping out of your sore cunt as he pulled out.
Eren plopped next to you and you curled up in a ball, head on his chest. You were craving his attention, his care, but he responded by bringing his hands behind his head, eyes staring blankly at the ceiling. He wanted to hold you tightly, he wanted to pet your head, but he couldn’t. And you were alright with that, because you knew that, no matter what, you would always have your own personal demon at your side.
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starshipsofstarlord · 3 years
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Hiya when u gave the time can you please a continuation of the luke from skins one where they were in Morocco and they are both back from Bristol now and they see eachother again and it’s a smut where they r high and kinda intense if that makes sense 😂 ❤️
What Happens in Morocco, Stays in Morocco
This is part two to this imagine, find it here
Pairing | Luke x reader
Summary | perhaps, you were wrong. Not everything stays in Morocco. It is a tradition for things to come back to bite you in the ass, more so when you have been forced to be clean, and kept away from any kind of drugs.
Warnings | use of drugs, addiction, smut, it’s bit dark so read at your own risk, this is a warning so please keep that in mind,
Quick link to my masterlist, if you’re interested in reading more of my crap 😬
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An insatiable stirred within your gut, pelting you with reminders of what you had lost after Morocco. The love of your life had been departed from your shaking grip, the people that claimed to care about you forcing you to be sober off the high that it gave you. Drugs. It was your only desire, but you stayed strong as you walked back from college, even as you saw a dealer out of the corner of your eye, trading his special product with someone in your English class, that sat two seats to the right of you.
Licking your lips, you held onto the straps of your rucksack tighter, hoping that the weight of all the items within it would succumb you under the lenient pressure that it composed against your spine, pushing you into a lower station of dwelling, so that you would feel nothing, and the emptiness sure as hell would not be burdening you with satisfactory mockery.
At such a young age, you had found a friend, even if it be absorbed into a conversation through digestion or clouded fumes. And without its presence you were someone else, a stranger trudging hopelessly through the ambient streets of Bristol, lost and in need for a high. That holiday had been the end of you, your friends didn’t say it, but you were more than certain that they were thinking such a spectacle.
Whilst you were amped up on various chemicals that engorged your veins with images of new possibilities, you were far from a sullen composure; you were happy. You had no problem speaking to Nick’s brother, though everyone seemed to be wary of him, and listening to Grace talk about her various recitals, and the strictness that her father intended upon her. To everyone you had been a breath of fresh air, until that place that they called rehab.
In there they had starved you from the one thing that you had truly craved. Even the security guy wouldn’t trade a blowjob for a little picking of white powder, and it showed you how messed up their priorities were. Morocco, it had been an escape, something you were sure it never feel again, but you wanted to, so desperately.
“If it isn’t the wisp of the waters, in the flesh, and looking like she could use a pick me up.” A blonde male asked, he couldn’t have been much older than yourself. There were scrapes adorning his pale complexion, brandishing his cheek with what could only be seen as battle scars from a testosterone endorsed fight.
“I’m sorry, but who the fuck are you?” You roughly spoke, having no recollection of ever meeting this man in your life, though, half of your memory was boggled. Going cold turkey appeared to have had that affect on you, but a deep internal part of you was warning you to leave now, and conserve your own safety from whatever offer he was about to propose.
Sure, you’d have once done anything, but the possibility of danger preached louder when there was nothing numbing your blood stream, and dirtying the contents that ran through it. A small snicker fled from the boy’s mouth, revealing that he was much amused by your naivety. He tilted his head, observing you with a lick of his lips, plodding closer as you froze.
“We’ve met before.” He toyed inside his pockets, extracting a clear bag that contained a couple of vibrant yellow pills that had your heart beating promiscuously against the captivity of your ribcage. “In fact, we got to know each other very well darling, your manners weren’t so spectacular then either, though they sure were better. It appeared as though you rather enjoyed the attention and now you’re here, looking like an innocent doe under the flare of headlights.”
“I don’t do that kinda stuff any more.” But you wanted to. It didn’t matter what prospects spewed out of your mouth in the form of conjunctive excuses, it was more than clear that you were aggressively attracted to the small spheres that had caught your attention fast. “I’d find the next girl to corrupt, because I’m clean and intend to stay that way.” Did you?
“You’re already corrupted, there’s no point in dismissing this, because it is what you want. But you’re denying urself from the simple luxuries of life, all because ripple; family, friends, think its better for you. They want you to be healthy, though that entails you perceiving though life as someone that you aren’t.” He sighed, rolling his shoulders slightly as his eyes bore around your sullen demeanour, recognising every trace that your body showed of restraining itself. “I’m Luke. And you, you are y/n, aren’t you? I’m sure I heard your friends call you that on holiday.”
Gulping, you realised that this must have been the boy that fucked with Frankie’s head, and made one of your group disappear, all whilst Grace was away, and in intensive care. As soon as it all clicked, you felt overwhelmed. There was nothing that you could do against him, he had already broken everything around you, whether that was his intent or not. Without thinking at all, you snatched the self made packet out of the clasp of his fingers, emptying the contents into your palm, throwing them into your mouth.
“Good girl.” It felt like a taunt, he was messing with you, you knew that. But it wasn’t his fault that you were messed up; all that was on you. “Don’t you want some water with that, it might make it wash down easier?” To answer him, you swallowed the pills dry cocking a brow at him as he pulled out another clear sachet of impulsive medications, taking it himself before you could whisk it away and endure further affects yourself.
Luke, feeling the tingle himself, pulled you down the alley that he was occupying, pressing your numbed back against the wall, his mouth running along your cheek as you felt swarmed with various desires. A part of you wanted to push him away, and beat him until he could no longer walk, but the other wanted nothing more than to feel his toxic skin dragging along yours, increasing the high that was spurring around your lungs until you felt like you could no longer breathe.
Your hands were uncertain of where they were supposed to be, and thus they roamed around his thin arms, grasping at his shoulders as his face sunk into the crook of your neck, his hands daring below your skirt, and feeling you up over your panties. Every touch he presented upon your burning flesh induced sparks to collapse in your mind, displaying through each of your appendages. “Fuck me, or I’ll find someone else to a better job.” You snarled at him, growling as he chuckled at your desperation.
“Now I recognise you, instead of that good girl facade.” He nipped at your neck, dropping his preppy slacks as he grasped his cock, thrusting your panties to the side so that he could penetrate your cunt, a cry abandoned your throat, echoing around the nearby streets. Your walls convulsed around him as you felt full and completely satisfied with the sensation. The memories of him flooded back into your mind as you pictured Morocco. He had stalked over towards you as though you were his prey, and it seemed that he had continued to hunt you down.
The thought was kinda hot, and thus you clenched your teeth, succumbing to an orgasm around him, whimpering as he slipped himself out, jerking his length so that he spilled his seed over your legs. “I have more of the good stuff back home, you fancy coming over?” Hazily you nodded, as his wobbling hand grasped your face, smashing his poisonous lips upon yours, suffocating all the good that you had been laboured into, making you swim in the darkness of his pupils as the two of you wobbled away from the scene, his cum still painted upon your legs as the two of you slowly headed towards his flat.
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vampiretickles · 2 years
Note
HIHIHI OMG UR SO SWEET THANK YOU FOR REBLOGING MY POST SOBS/pos I WAS WONDERING!! DO YOU HAVE ANY SWEET LITTLE INSIDE JOB TICKLE HEADCANONS YOURSELF?? LITERALLY ANYTHING BC WE ARE ALL STARVED FOR CONTENT BAHAHA (ur girl rly loves brett but no pressure I’d just love to see him either get wrecked or wreck someone ❤️❤️) BAHABAHA BUT WHATEVER YOU DO OR IF YOU CAN DO ANYTHING IS PERFECT!! SENDING YOU GOOD VIBES AND AGAIN THANK YOUUU
INSIDE JOB TKL HEADCANONS
I binge watched basically the whole thing in one sitting, I am in love!!!
Ofc as soon as i watched it i rushed to google the classic “*insert fandom here* tickle fics”. Thanqu sm for the ask, i'm so glad i could find something /pos lol, i feel u with the content starve aahh
also very sorry for the length of this lmao
(Ok so i've come to the sudden realisation that someone who works on the show could like… technically see this, so if you have anything to do with inside job… kindly wipe ur memory of this <333)
As usual, first one here & then the rest under the cut!
Ok so I’ll start with the mc and leave best to last, bc i need to contain myself somewhat, having said that: here is the main cast!
Reagan:
Ok this amazing(ly stressed) woman is probably super sensitive due to not being used to physical contact
I feel like at one point Bearo definitely had/has a tickle setting
*queue more trauma for reagan*
Ok so I can't tell if this is better or worse than hugging, but I think there is a chance she may not attack someone that tries to tickle her, IF they are very close
Like Brett or someone like that
I think her sides are her worst spot, and if anyone attempts to tickle them she r u n s
Her neck is also ticklish, but she can tolerate it a bit more
I don't think she is massively ticklish, but as I said, she definitely has a few sensitive spots
If you take her by surprise, be prepared to eat fist. Sorry lol
Her laughter is probably slightly strained, that slowly turns into cackles, and eventually choking lol
Maybe giggling
Swears a lottt
She will get payback. She will be deadly.
Goes straight for the worst spot, which she figures out extremely quickly
She probably has a math to figuring out someone's worst spot without fail every time
If it comes to be a common occurrence, she will create a bot for it
Will mean tease you
THE BOT WILL TEASE YOU
Tickles ppl who piss her off lol
Gigi:
Ok so i have like, not much for Gigi Luigi??
But I do know she does NOT like being messed with
Like 95% ler ok
She tickles Dr Andre a lot
Ok she tickles everyone, just for fun
She most likely has sensitive feet
CACKLES
She has her nails done and kinda long, which are super scratchy and definitely good to wreck ppl with lol
Yeah thats about it sorry lol
Hopefully she’ll get more screen time and more abt her character next season tho
Glenn:
Fucking. Dolphin man
LETS GO
So like… hes a dolphin? But hes still ticklish? Can dolphins be ticklish?
My first thought are his armpits, and tummy, like they’ve gotta be super bad
I think maybe his tail as well? Or is that too odd? Lol
I’m sorry but the first thing that came to mind is that it like.. A fetish for him. Ok im sorry that was just a bad thought, not an actual headcanon lol
Dkgjgkjdgndkjndfj im so sorry lets not dwell on that
Rougher tickles work on him a lot more than softer ones do
Ok so i also think he has a ticklish back ok
He's not suuppperrr ticklish, but he’s still really ticklish
Once you really get him laughing, he starts making dolphin noises
He has sharp scratchy claws. Get fucked. Lmao
So yeah he can definitely be a deadly ler if he wants to be
He probably doesn’t get too caught up in any of the gangs tickly shenanigans
But sometimes he will partake in the occasional tickle fight
He will win
His teases are definitely very.. Army like
Like “is that all you got, soldier? Not gonna fight back?”
Stuff like that
Ok if we are ignoring what has been,, previously stated, I think he’s neutral about the subject/ being tickled
Magic Myc:
Ok I have noo idea how he works but he definitely likes fucking around with people
So yes he likes tickling people/ engages a lot of tickle fights
I mean… look at him. He’s perfect
6 arms to tickle with and hold people down with
Oh god y’all better watch out
Since he can read minds, if he knows/meets anyone in the tkl community, he will KNOW
And he will not be afraid to let you know/ embarrass the shit out of you
Lmao have fun
Knowing him, he would probably assume its a sex thing
But either way he wouldn't rlly care
He definitely enjoys tickling ppl so yk
Mega tease
Is he ticklish? Maybe
His tummy thing is definitely ticklish
His tentacle… dicks are all a little ticklish
His laughter is very chaotic and silly
Definitely the giggler
Also makes high pitched, guttural cackles
Basically all the laughter lol
I think he likes it a little, depends on who it is tbh
He’s basically just a silly guy thing. He’s a little shit who likes to annoy ppl and have fun so he’s always up to tickling. Lee or ler.
Dr Andre:
OK so this guy. Likes to have fun
Very much ler energy, but also massive lee oh god oh fuck
His giggles throughout the series <333333
Definitely has tickle monster energy
He enjoys having tickle fights and playing a lot when he’s high, but being tickled gives him a small high lol
Snorts a lot
He’s super teasy but he’s not very good at it??
When he tickles someone he’s all over the place, he never stays in one spot for more than a second
This is very effective
Him and Myc would team up a LOT
And they make an amazing team lol
Andre is like one huge tickle spot ngl
Death by raspberry.
His ribs and armpits are definitely his worst spots
Also his feet will make him scream
He probably screeches a lot
He likes back tickles tho
Definitely likes being held down while tickled
I'm trying not to get too sexual here but… yk its Dr. Andre
He has definitely met a few ppl who are into it that way. He has done many things.
I’ll keep it at that I think lol
Brett:
My boy. My baby boy.
Touch starved and craving familial love
So he definitely likes tickling
Major lee.
Sdjfhsghsakjflsfjowbgwjingwgjwr <33333333333
Like idk if there would be tickling scenes in the growing years but like, he is definitely aware that kids get tickled by their older siblings/ parents, and would be jealous of those who experienced it as a child
Also just craving any touch he can get
If you wiggle your fingers at his tummy but don’t actually touch him. So many giggles.
HE IS SO CUTE
He has little snorts. His laughter is raspy and high pitched and especially whiny. Literally angels laughter
Hiccupy giggles
Enjoyer of tickly neck kisses.
His tummy is super duper ticklish
Even the lightest tickles will get him laughing like crazy
Especially if you kiss his tummy. Like he will go insane with laughter, also bc he feels so loved and he never wants it to stop.
Definitely cries. Like no overwhelmed but it’s just his reaction
Ok get ready for this one its revolutionary:
SUPER TICKLISH INNER THIGHS/ HIPS
Like that whole area just makes him scream, especially if you dig in
Okay but his thighs are super thicc
His armpits r super bad as well
Raspberries kill this man. Absolutely destroy him.
If you tease him, call him cute, stuff like that, he’ll go bright red and giggle even more. He also genuinely takes the compliments to heart and will be thinking about it months later
Loves cuddles <3
Ok ler time lol
He’s surprisingly super gentle and loving
HE WILL STILL WRECK YOU THO DON’T BE FOOLED
He’s super sweet and compliments ur smile
Definitely gives cheer up tickles
Literally “where’s that smile??!?!?”
Gives deadly raspberries
Likes tickle fights
He just likes making people happy
Tickling is definitely like another love language for him
He just. Likes tickling.
Laughs along with you
Definite tickle monster
He likes playing games and loves cute reactions
Ok just imagine his laugh some more. Ok good.
He cannot stay still tho lol
The gang love tickling him sm, especially when Myc drops that Brett likes it and missed out on those experiences as a kid
Omg myc stfu but also brett secretly thanking him bc now he gets tickles lol
Okkk that’s all I’ve got for now. Feel free to send more asks tho :))
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Mommytober Series 2022-Day 10
Overstimulation w Kim Seungmin (Stray Kids)
Dom!Seungmin x Sub!Fem Reader
Content Includes: Brat!reader, oral (female receiving), nipple play, very little foreplay, hard dom!Seungmin, degradation, Seungmin calls reader 'baby'.
18+ Only.
Inspired by @chvnssecret hard hours page!!
This is pure filth and does not portray an accurate representation of the stated Kpop idol.
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'Minnie, I'm bored' you whined in his direction and gave him your best pout.
It had been weeks since you have had time to just fucking talk to him, even when he was with you, he was always working.
'Baby, I'm going to finish soon okay? And then we can cuddle on the couch' Seungmin didn't even look up from his laptop, the sound of the 'click-clacking' of the keyboard grating on your ears.
Enough was enough.
A cheeky smirk crept up on your face as you slowly stalked to the side of the bed, watching him lie on his stomach as he continued to neglect you with his attention.
Fingertips padded lightly across the edge of the laptop screen, a look of challenge in your eyes. You leaned down to look at Seungmin in the eye, leaning on your hands so you were looming over him.
Not even Seungmin could calculate you closing the lid of the laptop as you clutched it at your chest and ran out into the living room, a high-pitched giggle left your lips as you playfully hurried into the living room,
'it's what you get for avoiding me!'
And you wedged the laptop between a couch cushion.
You stood in the living room and stared right back at Seungmin's agitated eyes, a soft but clipped voice spoke from his throat,
'Give me the laptop baby, I was working on something very important' An eyebrow raised as your hands were on your hips, you could see the agitation in his eyes.
Good, that's exactly what you were wanted.
The stage was yours, the attention on you. A dramatic sigh and shrug left your body,
'I don't know where the laptop went, I guess it must have disappeared'.
Seungmin's eyes changed in front of you, a predatory glance exchanged as he finally understand what you wanted.
He took the bait and you were ready to be devoured.
Seungmin saw the cheeky look in your eyes, your face glowing with mischief. Yes, he was pissed and frustrated.
But he loved it when you were like this if it meant he could fuck the brattiness out of you.
He saw the flinch in your body as he strode towards you, finger and thumb holding the crook of your chin and he tilted you to look up at him. He leaned down just to tease his lips against yours, his lips just dusting over yours.
'If you wanted my cock baby, all you had to do was ask'.
Your touch-starved self was already dripping at Seungmin's slight dominance but you couldn't give in just yet, you just had to give him one final push.
'Where's the fun in that?'
You glared at him, a hint of weariness in your voice.
Then you saw the patience in him snap as large hands wrapped around your hips and he left a bruising kiss on your lips. Fuck, Seungmin had missed this. He didn't realise it was so long as he wrapped your legs around his waist and gently placed you on the floor, he didn't even kiss your neck and just went to mouth your right nipple through your tank top.
'Is this what you want from me baby? Want me to fuck you until you can't come here anymore You're already so sensitive, you think you can come just from my tongue alone?' Seungmin crooned into your chest, the condescending lilt adding to the filthiness of knowing you were about get fucked on the living room floor.
'Yes, please Minnie, I want it so badly, just fuck me' you pleaded, your voice all whiny and pleading as you felt Seungmin pull your pyjama pants.
A husky laugh left his throat,
'Not even wearing underwear baby? I love how much you're a slut for me'.
You barely could even respond before you felt his tongue rapidly flick your clit before you could prepare yourself.
Should you be embarrassed you only came 10 minutes later?
No because it was his fault you couldn't last as long as you did.
Seungmin pulled his head away, he looked up at you, mouth wet and eyes glazed.
'You wanted my attention so much baby, let's see how many times you can cum on my tongue until I get bored'.
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Taglist: @reighlee-greaves @honeyhotteoks @hongthoven @iliana26 @mischiefsmind @vernon-s-whore @hipster-shiz @ateezreactionsandscenarios @seungminluv3 @creativechaoticloner @chvnssecret @chvnnie @monstaxdirtywonk @destiny-fics
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creepling · 3 years
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am i not enough? (quackity x reader) - apocalypse!AU
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( 。・_・。)人(。・_・。 ) | part of the @quackisinnit 1k event !
THE PROMPT IS . . . “ AM I NOT ENOUGH ? “
pairing: irl!quackity x genderneutral!reader (apocalypse!AU)
word count: 3,306
summary: the reader and alex become a duo while coming across each others paths during a zombie apocalypse. tensions rise as they set up camp in a warehouse, where alex begins to confess how he feels towards the reader. (angst into fluff <33)
tw: zombie apocalypse, blood (ment), cursing, guns, death, eating.
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It had been three months since the fallen of mundane life. Three months of complete abnormality, everything known to be in existence that was worth caring about; completely gone. jobs, currency, education were becoming a historic relic. The world was put back to zero. Instead of cavemen and dinosaurs, the new species of flesh-eating corpse’s roamed in packs and seeked for fresh meat. They may have been slow, but they travelled in numbers and they could smell you from a mile away. I learned that your scent became less of a problem when you didn’t keep hygenic. My stence blended with the earth and blood and the roamers didn’t catch us out as much; so we used that to our advantage.
I only had one companion, his name was Alex. He was absolutely dumbfounded when I discovered him. I raided his abandoned home looking for supplies, and when I had to kill a roamer that vacaded in his bedroom; I found him curled up in a ball under his bed. He told me that he had been hiding the whole month when he realised help was to never come; so his only plan was to hide out until he ran out of supplies. That became a problem when I attempted to take them. We made the mutual agreement that if I was to take the supplies, he would come with me. I refused to stay and hide; that is how you get yourself killed. Thankfully he agreed to come with me, and we have been inseperable ever since. However, our bond is nothing close to a friendship, we just had to stick together to survive.
Alex’s main idea was to find a group, hoping by now someone had turned one of the surbubans into a mini civilization. We had travelled between three cities however and we found no sign of good company. As a duo, we have only killed one human within these three months. A man who tried to kill us at gunpoint in hopes of taking our things, to which we scarsely saved our lives by ducking behind a bar table. With one aimless shoot, I shot my gun and it pierced through the man’s chest. I saved our lives, but the sight of the man’s lifeless eyes still haunts me in my sleep. 
One night, Alex found a two-store warehouse to shelter in while on a supply run. He suggested we camp on the second floor and catch up on our sleep and starvation, since we eventually got ahold of sleeping bags and tinned food. I agreed, but reminded him the stay can’t be perminant. He agreed also, still fixated on the idea of finding a commune.
While I made a fire and cooked food, I obvserved Alex drawing in a notepad. I failed to make out what he was doing so I asked, “What are you drawing?”
“I’m trying to draw a map.” He said to me, “It’s not accurate, but it will give us a rough idea of the roads until we find a map.”
“I didn’t take you as a smart person.” I said, hoping he didn’t think I meant it seriously. It was rare for me to joke in times like these, but when I did, my humour came off dry. Thankfully, my comment made Alex scoff out a chuckle.
“And I didn’t take you for a fighter.” Alex said. Since being with each other for two months, we both naturally adopted different roles that benefitted us. Alex was the navigator, the finder; he seemed to have a good sense of direction and I relied on him to not get lost. He also had a good eye and was always good at finding things such as second-way exits or food hiding in obscure places. For me, my job was a lot more physical. I was a good shoot, I knew how to make a fireplace, or bandage a wound. When things got dirty, I would get lucky and save our asses.
“Your food’s ready.” I said, handing him his warm can of chicken soup and a packet of chips. He thanked me, putting his notebook down and sitting cross-legged beside me. As we ate we sat in silence, the only sounds in the warehouse being our mouths chewing the food. We hadn’t ate in nearly a week. I tried my best to chew my chips before swallowing so I didn’t end up with stomache pain, but the instant flavour shot through my tongue and I instinctly ate them quickly. Alex finished his food within minutes, licking the chip packet and his fingers; scraping every last bit of soup from the can and into his mouth. I reluctantly did the same, feeling a little embarrassed; I have never felt so starved in my life. 
“That was fucking amazing.” Alex sighed out, now heating his hands over the fire. I nodded in agreement, collecting the empty tin cans and keeping them next to our things. They will be handy for traps, tying them with strings and hanging them in the woods while hunting would let us know of intruders. It was the small things like that that has made us survive this long.
“Are you gonna go to sleep now? I could keep watch.” I offered, observing Alex’s bloodshot eyes. If we had mirrors, we would flinch at our reflections. Alex looked rough. He always wore his beanie, which he apparently did even before things got bad. He always had a collective spot of dirt on his nose and cheekbones no matter how clean we were, it’s where it always collected the most. His hands were the most dirty, dirt under his short nails and inbetween his fingers. From the rare occasions we touched hands, I felt the softness of his hands, compared to mine that felt aged and rough. His knuckles were stained with blood. Out of both of us, I was covered in the most blood. When I looked down, my hands had a reddish tint, observing more I could see small cuts on my hands from being idle with my knife when striking roamer’s heads. Without having to see, I knew I had sprays of blood on my face from the amount of times I killed roamers. To think when life was normal we cared so much about our appearence, but now activities like doing makeup, brushing your hair, brushing your teeth seemed so pointless. We were slowly becoming used to primitive life and deep down that scared me. I think it scared Alex too.
“I’m tired as fuck, but I know I won’t sleep.” Alex said in a low tone, looking at his hands full of shame. I nodded my head in understanding, knowing exactly how he was feeling. We hadn’t slept properly in months, instead when one person kept watch, the other just lay down with their eyes closed. We forgot what it was like to dream, or to feel hazy. We were constantly alert.
“Since we have no intention of sleeping. Why don’t we play a game?” Alex said. I cocked my eyebrow up in question. What game could we play that didn’t involve making noise and attracting attention?
“We ask each other 20 questions. Normally if you don’t want to answer a question- you would have to do a dare. But hey, wants the point in hiding nowadays?” Alex said, looking at me contently.
“We should be hiding ourselves more than ever, I think.” I said, adding fuel to the fire to keep it burning. “That way no one knows our weaknesses.”
“So you don’t trust me?” Alex said. His question threw me off. It’s not that I didn’t trust him, but maybe I was unwilling to get to know him. I had already lost the people close to me, and I was still in grieving. I was too afraid to get close with Alex. I always had the thought in the back of my head that one day, I might end up losing him. His intelligence may only get him so far.
“I understand.” Alex said, taking back his question. Seeing the hurt in my eyes, he must have realized what I was thinking. He lost his close ones too. We both lost so much, we had a mutual understanding about that. Yet, I looked at Alex, and he still felt like a mystery to me. He always pulled out jokes, even in times like these. However, in moments when he thought I wasn’t looking, I could see the pain concealed in his face. Sometimes I even heard him cry at night when he thought I was sleeping. Maybe it was about time we opened up to each other, instead of feeling like we need to suffer alone. We could be there for each other not just physically, but emotionally.
“Okay then, since it was your idea, you ask the first question.” I said, hugging my legs to my chest. Alex smiled a little at me, going into thought as he tried to think of a question.
“So, what did you do when life was normal?” He asked first.
I let out a sigh then replied, “I had a very normal life. Lived with my family, did average in school, worked a job to get money. I actually had plans of moving out to the city, I always wanted to go to LA. I never really had aspirations, just wanted to be content.” It sounded boring, but I was happy with my life. I had my ups and downs like everyone else. “What were you like?”
Alex smirked and looked away from me, seeming to become bashful. “I was a twitch streamer.” He said. “And had a Youtube channel. God- it sounds so stupid now that I say it. Like it was all pointless-”
“Were you like- famous?” I asked, trying to conceal a smile.
“Um- I guess you could say that. I had millions of followers.” Alex shook his head, “But I also went to college. I was studying law. I was always staying up late, barely sleeping; both studying and streaming all the time. It took up my whole life, that I just kinda forgot about everything else.”
“Well, you were obviously not famous, because I didn’t know who you were.” I jokingly said, nudging his side. That seemed to make him smile and feel less embarassed.
“So how the hell did you learn how to shoot if you lived such a normal life?” He asked.
“I just learned while doing it. My dad kept a gun.” I admitted, looking at the very same gun I had in the holster wrapped around my thigh. “He would teach me now and then how to use it, but I was never a shooter. The more roamers I shot, the more I got used to it.” Thinking about someone close to me made me chew the inside of my cheek anxiously.
To deflate my melancholy, I asked the next question. “Did you always wear that stupid hat?”
Alex chuckled and rubbed the top of his hat. “Yeah, twenty-four seven. I don’t why, I just find it comfortable. My “fans” would joke that I was bald because I never showed my hair.” He said, “God- saying the word fans sounds fucked up . . .”
“Maybe you’ll bump into one of them.” I said, “Heck- maybe there’s a commune right now dedicated to you, trying to find you and keep you safe.”
Alex laughed again, covering his face with his hands. I laughed alongside him, the first time I genuinely laughed in a good few weeks. Looking at Alex, seeing how I uplifted him, it struck a chord with me. As much as I didn’t like to show it, but he made affects on me that were indescribable. He made me feel just a little more contempt, without him I would probably not be able to cope for this long. We eventually locked eyes with each other, Alex’s gaze being longer than I expected. If it wasn’t for the blood, my face would have exposed the blush forming on my cheeks.
“Have you ever fell in love, (Y/N)?” Alex then asked me, which set me aback. The question was out the blew and I think Alex realised that as he looked away shyly, his gaze fixated on the flames of the fire to avoid my gaze. I still stared at him, almost in amazment, trying to conjuct a reasonable answer.
“I don’t know.” I answered. “I have loved people, yes, but- I don’t think I have been in love. You’re suppose to know when things like that happen, right?”
Alex didn’t answer me, he kept staring at the fire. I found myself admiring his side profile, watching how he slowly bit his lip; concealed in thought. I noticed how the glow of the flames contrasted with the darkness of his eyes, how the light outlined his complexion. When I realized I was staring for too long, I looked away, instead my eyes looked out the warehouse window, my eyes tracing the stars in the night sky. 
“I feel like I have known you forever.” Alex admitted all at once. “It’s only been two months, but I have gotten close to you more than anyone I have in my whole life. It might sound crazy but- I believe we were suppose to come together that day.”
My gaze turned back to Alex when I felt his eyes lay upon me. His stare was soft, something I only seen in passing times. I was able to admire him for the first time since we met. In this moment, in the dead of night, away from danger and suspicion; I could look at him with full sentiment. I didn’t need to admire him when he was less suspecting it, afraid of receiving decline or making things awkward. In this moment I realized, I may have developed feelings more than companionship towards him. That excited me. But also terrified me.
“I feel that way with you, Alex.” I admitted, “But . . .”
I decided to choose my words carefully. This conversation was heading in a direction that made me nervous. The world is falling apart around us, and I couldn’t help but question our motives. We should be focusing on survival, not developing a relationship that could be destroyed at any second. Once we step out this warehouse, our chances of losing our lives become high. I wasn’t prepared to damage my mental state, it was already bad enough. I realized my long pause was making Alex shift nervously, so I looked at him in hopes my words would slip from my mouth.
I caved in, muttering lowly, “We should get some rest.” I got up on my feet and was ready to grab my sleeping bag and make up a place to rest, until I heard Alex get his his feet and say words that made my heart sink.
“Am I not enough?”
When I turned to look at him, the hurt was glistening in his eyes. He gulped dryly and he fumbled with his fingers. My eyes shifted from side to side as I was stuck with my words. I kept stammering, and I rubbed my face in stress, ready to plead my case. Until Alex jumped in.
“Don’t think I’m only saying these things to you because there is no one else, (Y/N). I have been thinking about this for a while, everytime I am left with my thoughts. I am certain I will still have the same feelings if we met when things didn’t go to shit. I don’t just think this because we have been the only people for each other. I really really like you, (Y/N). And because of the way the world is, I never want to lose you. I never want you to feel alone ever again. I not only want to protect you because we’re a team, I want to protect you because the thought of losing you pains me so much.”
For a split second I thought Alex was about to burst into tears. That was when I did something I thought I would never do again, which was pull him into my embrace. I hugged Alex so tight that I heard him gasp, freeze, until he eventually wrapped his arms around me and held me just as tight. My face buried into the crook of his neck, feeling the warmth of his body, his soft hands caressing my back and brushing his thumb down my spine in a soothing manner.
“You are enough, Alex.” I said, my words muffled by his body. I reached my lips to his ear so he could hear my words clearly. “I just didn’t want you to feel like you had to like me, or be forced to like me just because we were brought together. I was afraid you thought you were stuck with me.”
I anticipated the day that once we meet other life, Alex would slowly fade away and forget who I was. Once he meets other people, we would go our seperate ways. I never knew why the hypothetical idea pained me so much, until now. As Alex pulled away from my embrace, looking me in the eyes in a loving manner that was foreign to me, his hands on my shoulders, I realized why that idea made my heart feel heavy. I never want him to leave me, I want him to always be by my side. Alex’s gaze was enough proof that he wanted the same.
Stimulated by his touch, I was taken aback when I felt his hand cup my cheek. The warmth of his breath breezing against my cheek, I inhaled as if oxygene was nonexistent. I never realized the proximity between us was slowly closing in and when I did my eyes fluttered shut. Alex hesitated for a split second before pressing his soft lips against my own. My neck bent slightly backwards and I shifted my head to the side to deepen into our kiss, my blood-stained hands grabbing the edges of his open jacket and holding him dearly close. The heat of the kiss intermingled with the heat from the fire, my cheeks and ears grew hot. Alex’s hands were surprisingly warm as he reached his hands under my shirt, pressing his fingers and palms on the middle of my back before running his touch down my spine. My breath became shaky and I felt my legs grow heavy under me, my hands cupped the back of his neck to keep myself uplifted, and luckily Alex’s arms held my weight and pressed my body against his. It felt like hours had went by between our lips moving in sync, our tongues grazing our bottom lip’s, our hands moving and resting on different parts of our bodies. His touch felt contagious, his kisses ranging between soft and passionate. I didn’t want to stop, I never wanted to let go. Between kisses I would mutter you are enough, you are enough which made Alex smile against my lips.
That night, everything we had to worry about became last priority. The focus all throughout was each other, making up for the days where affection couldn’t be shown. In the dead of night, there wasn’t a roamer in sight. Instead of hearing narls and groans or screams of pain, there was only the faint sounds of nature. The full moon glistened, as if to be a prediction for the emotions spilling between us. I promised myself from this moment on, as I admired Alex, I would protect him no matter what. I will make sure he always feels safe as long as he is beside me. He will always be enough, if not more.
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TAGLIST: @momo-has-a-gun @diggorysmalfoy @quack42069​ (join my taglist)
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traekenimagines · 3 years
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Hunting Season, Part Four: A Theo Raeken Imagine
Request from Anon: would it be possible to request theo edging fem! reader for hunting season please? thank youuu 😄
Again, you were warned. Hope this is okay for you lovely, and enjoy x
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“Where’s that girlfriend of yours?”
“We’re working through some issues.”
Issues, sure. But not the sort Theo imagined Deucalion thought he meant. Y/N was at home, waiting, and the thought was enough for Theo to want to speed up the conversation with his captive. He needed to get home to her, needed to resolve those issues.
Issues that meant getting payback. Issues that meant she had left him wanting, that meant he had to relieve himself in the car. Twice. The image of her lips wrapped around him, his cock hitting the back of her throat as he fucked her mouth, swam through his mind as he came in his hand. It was good, but not good enough.
He needed her and this time, he was going to make Y/N wait, just as she had done for him that morning.
So, issues, yes. Issues he desperately wanted to tackle.
“Well then maybe you should get back to her, work through those issues.”
“Oh,” Theo smirked, “I plan on it.”
An hour later, straining against his jeans, that image of her writhing beneath him ever present in his mind, Theo walked through the front door. Y/N sat on the armchair, wearing only his shirt, thighs on display. “Hey you.”
Theo said nothing as he kicked off his shoes before striding over to her.
“I said hey.”
Still nothing. Not a single word as Theo put a hand on either thigh and knelt between her legs.
“Somebody’s eager today.” Theo looked up at Y/N’s words, at that smile on her face as she realised just what he was planning. He knew he looked like an animal starved, a predator, but he didn’t care. Not when he moved one of his hands, palming her through her panties, causing her to hiss. He could feel how much she wanted him, imagined she had been satisfying herself alone with images of him spurring her on whilst he was away.
Well, she was going to get him. But he was going to have some fun with her first.
He didn’t speak as he slid her panties down her legs, fingers making sure to trail down her bare legs. He could smell her arousal and it was taking everything he had not to undo his jeans and bury himself in her, fucking her on the chair.
He would do that eventually.
Not yet.
Y/N giggled as Theo put his hands back on her thighs and spread her legs apart, exposing her core to him. Her laughter was silenced as he looked at her, eyes on hers, never breaking contact, not as he inserted a finger into her, that giggle transforming into a moan.
At first, he was slow, that single finger moving in and out of her folds with a cadence that had her clutching at the arms of the chair, her hips bucking towards him as she clambered for more. For the first time, Theo spoke, satisfaction in his words. “Just one finger and you’re already like this? Let’s find out what another one does to you.”
Theo knew exactly what another finger would do to her, and he inserted it with force, watching as Y/N’s knuckles grew white, another, louder, moan leaving her lips. Theo curled his fingers inside her, her wetness coating him. He felt her clench around him, and that was when he knew.
It was time for those issues to be resolved.
Theo removed his fingers quickly and watched with arrogance as Y/N glared at him. He leaned up to her level, whispering in her ear. “Doesn’t feel nice when someone won’t let you come, does it Y/N?”
“Fuck you.” There it was, that bitterness that Theo had wanted, the spite in Y/N’s voice as she realised just what game her boyfriend was playing, reminding him of the ache in his groin, just how much he wanted to have her.
Theo chuckled into her ear, letting his lips brush against her skin. “So tetchy. All you have to do is ask me nicely.” He swiped a finger back up her core, earning a whimper. “And I might let you.”
He pulled away from her, and licked his fingers, tasted her, knowing just what it would do to her, knowing that however much she tried to remain stoic, that action would be enough for her to break.
He was right.
“Please, Theo.” She rubbed her thighs together, desperate for friction. “Please.”
She was begging for him, begging for the release that only he could give her. He reveled in that fact, and would have accepted her request had he not been in a particularly devilish mood. He smirked again, taking her hand and pulling her up off the armchair. Unfastening his jeans, he took her place as she stood before him, eyes never leaving hers again as he pulled his cock out, breathing at the freedom. “See, you weren’t very nice to me this morning, Y/N. So you’ll understand if I want to stretch this out a bit longer.”
Y/N’s gaze flitted from his face to his cock, biting her lip, the desperation for him evident on her face at the latter. Theo could see from the tension in her neck that she was holding out, waiting for the moment when she could sink onto him, the moment when she could let go. He nodded, and couldn’t hold in the growl that left his lips as he felt her warmth envelop him.
There were her hands on his collarbone, fingers sliding up his neck as she settled onto him. She made to move, but Theo stopped her. “Don’t you dare move, not yet. I told you, I want to stretch this out.” He was pretty sure Y/N would have punched him had she not been trying to exert some sort of control in the situation. He could see as he stayed still, as he let himself remain inside her without any movement, that she was trying so hard not to give him the satisfaction of coming straight away.
He knew that when that moment came, that moment when she gave in, he would delight in her wetness on him, that he would be quick to follow in his release. His hand was good, but he had needed more than that this morning, and he was going to let her know about it.
He growled as Y/N shifted on him. It was growing harder for him not to let her go wild, and as much as he wanted the satisfaction of not letting her come, of edging her, bringing her so close to the brink before pulling out, he knew that what she would do, the things she could do with her core, wouldn’t allow that.
He leaned over, hands on her hips as he bit her earlobe. “Beg for it. Beg for me to fuck you.” He moved, earning a whine from Y/N. “Beg for me to let you come.”
“Please, Theo. I’m sorry. Just”- she moaned as he moved again- “Please fuck me. Please let me-” Her last word was swallowed by her screams as Theo thrust up into her, those issues on their way to their solution as Theo felt Y/N clench around him again. He was half-tempted to stop, to make her beg for him again, but before he had the time to do so, she had found her release, her fingers digging into his shoulder as she came.
He followed suit, finally finding his own release, the ecstasy that he had been hoping for that morning as she gripped his cock tight. Drawing it out had been worth it as he felt her core pulse over him, felt her wetness coat him as she came, spurring him on in his own release.
When she had finished, her forehead resting on his shoulder, Theo hooked a finger under her chin, forcing her to look at him. He shifted as he did so, earning a contented sigh from her as his cock still remained inside her. He smiled at her. “Maybe I should play with you like that more often, Y/N.”
“You do and I’ll fucking kill you.”
“No you won’t. Not as long as I’m the one fucking you. You’d miss me too much.”
Y/N didn’t answer, just kissed him, devouring his lips. As she moved, he felt himself move, almost sliding out of her before she sat back down, keeping him buried inside her. “You’re right, I would.” She moved again, up and down his cock slowly and deliberately. Theo felt his eyes roll into the back of his head as she continued.
“What are you doing?”
“My turn to play, Theo. Like you said, we need to stretch this out.”
Theo growled as she sunk back onto him, release already building. He had a feeling she wasn’t going to let him get off that easy.
He was right.
Hunting Season Masterlist
Masterlist
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