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#i don’t like people worrying about me or feeling like they have to take care of me
sunrizef1 · 1 day
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Guilty as sin?
Pairing: Max Verstappen x reader | (side) Lando Norris x reader
Warnings: Emotional cheating
Word count: 1.8k
Authors note: hate this kinda idk | Not proofread | I also do not condone cheating, this is just based on a Taylor swift song do not come for me
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A text lights up your phone, illuminating the dark of your hotel room with the shine of a text message. You glance down at your sleeping boyfriend beside you, checking to see if he’s still deeply asleep before picking up your phone and sliding it open.
Max <3
The Downtown Lights - The Blue Nile
*Spotify link attached*
You sigh, closing your phone and setting it back onto your nightstand, eyes shutting tightly. You glance back over to Lando, asleep beside you, willing him to suddenly be a shittier person so you could feel less guilty about this.
Not that you and Max had done anything. You hadn’t. But it didn’t stop you from daydreaming about the Red Bull driver. It hadn’t stopped him either, apparently. You had heard the song, of course you had. Max sending it only confirmed that the less than platonic feelings between you were, in fact, reciprocated.
Just as you’re about to roll over and return to the sleep that had been evading you for more than a few hours, your phone lights up once again.
Max <3
I know you saw that
Come up to the roof
See you there
You roll your eyes at the texts, arrogance bleeding through every letter. Although, despite your holier than thou attitude, you do slide out of the bed, reaching down to a slide on a pair of slippers, praying the bed won’t creak as you stand up. Your feet pad quietly across the carpet of the hotel room, steps muffled by the fluff in your shoes.
You turn your phone to face the room, hoping it’s enough light to illuminate your way out. You step around your suitcase in the middle of the floor, cursing quietly as your foot catches on the zipper slightly. You catch yourself though, quickly grasping your key card and exiting the room.
Once you’re in the hallway, you let out a deep sigh, face relaxing under the fluorescent lights. You bit your lip, debating how worth it this tryst would be. You were fairly certain you were both into each other. All this meeting would be was another interaction where you both ignore your feelings and you have to lock the hints he was dropping away in a vault to never be considered again.
Even after considering the cons, you push yourself away from the wall, walking toward the stairs. You were already on the top floor so all you had between you and Max was a single set of stairs. You run a hand through your hair, hoping you don’t have a bad case of bedhead. Not that you had gotten enough sleep to mess your hair up at all anyway.
You slide the door open and set foot upon the stairs, trying not to wobble too much. Every step feels like it takes twenty minutes, every one leading to an unknown fate at the top. Your footsteps echo around the dark hall, sound bouncing off the concrete walls.
When you get to the top, you push the door open gently, cold air rushing to hit you as you step out. The door shuts closed behind you with a slam and you’re suddenly not sure if you’ll be able to get it open again. But it wasn’t really the time to care about that as your eyes lock on a familiar Dutch man sat on the edge of the roof.
Your feet patter gently against the roof, each step feeling quieter than the last. You take your time in approaching him, his head not even having turned your way since you set foot upon the place he had invited you. Not that you wanted him to turn around. You were worried that locking eyes with him would make you run away, or worse, make you more inclined to stay. So you just walk quietly to the edge, carefully swinging your legs over the side to sit a few feet away from him.
You’re not too worried about falling. There’s another edge just a few yards below you, no doubt there to stop rich drunk people from taking a nosedive off the roof during a party or after a wild night.
Cold air slides across your unusually warm face, heated with the reality of the situation. It’s not windy though, which is nice. Instead it’s just a nice chill, cold seeping through your thin sleep shirt and into your skin.
“I knew you’d come,” Max’s voice breaks the tranquility of the moment, cutting through the air with a familiar arrogant tilt.
You fight the urge to roll your eyes, instead opting to hum lightly, eyes still locked onto the cityscape below you. You’d always loved Las Vegas. The city was always bursting with life and it was just so pretty to look at. Especially from above. It has shocked you when you’d walked out and the roof was empty. You’d’ve thought there’d be an abundance of people considering how little the city sleeps to begin with. You were honestly surprised Lando had chosen to stay asleep in your hotel room instead of stay out partying. Maybe when you’d told him it’d be better for him to get some sleep for once, he’d actually listened.
Maybe you should’ve listened to your own advice. You should’ve stayed asleep and completely avoided Max. Maybe then you wouldn’t feel like spewing your guts out on the many drunkards below.
“Not going to say anything, then?” Max laughs and you can feel his gaze on the side of your face. You fight the strong urge to lock eyes with him, “You don’t get to act like I’m the one coercing you here. You also chose to come up here.”
He’s right, of course. But you weren’t going to give him the satisfaction of knowing you wanted him just as much as he wanted you.
“Do you even like him?” Max questions and you can feel your stomach drop. You’d been thinking about that exact question for months now and you honestly were dreading the answer. You finally look away from the buildings in front of you to take a quick glance toward Max, his eyes already trained on yours.
You sigh, warm breath clouding in the cold night air, “I don’t know.”
Max makes a face at your words, shaking his head, “What do you mean you don’t know? How can you not know if you like your boyfriend?”
You roll your eyes, looking away from him again, arms crossing across your torso tightly, “I mean I don’t know, Max. I know the answer you want, trust me, I do. If it helps, I don’t love him. Not anymore, at least.”
“Yeah, no shit. I knew that. I’m asking if you like him,” Max scoffs, shifting closer to you. You roll your eyes again, finally giving in and turning your body toward his.
“He’s a fine person, Max. It just feels like neither of us even want this relationship anymore.”
“Then why are you still dating him?”
That makes you stop dead, letting out a shaky breath as you accept that you’d finally have to open up to the man next to you, “We’ve been together so long, I’ve tried so hard to make it work. I thought we were going to get married, honestly.”
You glance nervously over to Max, expecting to see an angry look on his face. Instead you’re met with one of understanding which shocks you back into speaking again, “I would’ve said yes if he’d asked.”
Max hums, discreetly shifting a bit closer as he turns to stare out at the city below you. You wait for his response with bated breath, praying he doesn’t hate you for basically leading him on.
“But he didn’t ask.”
“Yeah,” you nod, face filled with remorse for your relationship, “He didn’t.”
Max hums again, glancing above the two of you at the shining lights casting a soft glow upon the pair of you. Music begins to play softly from somewhere down below you. When you glance over the edge, you’re met with a street band preforming a nice ballad, swaying along to their melodies. When Max stands up, you think he’s going to leave you entirely but your eyebrows shoot up when he holds out a hand instead.
“Come on,” He says and you can feel your heart flutter as you catch the soft smile on his face. Something that hadn’t happened with Lando in a long while.
You grasp you hand in his, feeling the warmth of his larger hands spread into your chilly ones. He pulls you up gently, although maybe adding a bit too much strength as you fall flush against his chest. You laugh and stumble back a bit, hands still clutching his. He pulls you into a sway, gliding along to the melodic notes that float up from down below. You sit and take in the quiet moment for a little while, eventually moving your head to rest against his chest. The silence is broken when you glance up and see Max already looking down at you.
“I’m not gonna cheat on Lando,” you mumble, eyes softening as you stare up, “He doesn’t deserve that.”
If Max disagrees, he keeps it to himself well enough, choosing to nod instead, “I wouldn’t expect you to.”
You hum, placing your head back on his chest, “I do think about you though.”
Max tilts his head and his eyebrows furrow as the words leave your mouth. When you catch his expression, you feel the need to explain, “Just in life. Everything I do, I think about you doing it with me. I don’t know, just accept the compliment that I think about you when you’re not around, please.”
You can feel Max’ laugh rumble through his chest and you glance up to see his head titled back and his eyes closed as he chuckles softly before glancing back at you, smile still painting his face, “I can live with that. For now.”
You take a page out of his book and just hum in response, eyes falling closed as you, once again, lean against him. The two of you sway to the music for a while, only stopping when it does as well. You find yourself praying it never does so you never have to return to your reality where your boyfriend of six years has refused to put a ring on it so you went to one of his friends for emotional comfort and ended up falling in love with him. But the music does stop and you do return to that reality, feet padding softly down the hotel stairs.
You slide your keycard in the door, wincing at the sound it makes as it accepts it. You support the door as it closes, toeing off your shoes and tossing the keycard on your nightstand. You plug your phone into the charger, glancing down at the new texts on your home screen before sliding them away and rolling over to, hopefully, find sleep in a sleepless night.
Max <3
I'll wait for you btw
I knew about him
But now I know about you
If he kills me it'd be a wonderful way to die
For you
I'd wait forever, darling
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Tags: @casperlikej @evie-119
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celesteleoves · 12 hours
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hcs of bakugou / todoroki being a hardcore simp for reader maybe?
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“I WANNA BE YOURS.”
KATSUKI BAKUGOU/SHOTO TODOROKI x reader.
summary: what the request said!
warnings: swearing (bakugou…), mentions of todoroki’s childhood (very brief), that’s it i believe!
BAKUGOU KATSUKI —
he is a very subtle simp. you probably wouldn’t even think he liked you if you guys weren’t already dating. the way he shows his love for you is… questionable.
he does the simple things like following you around like a lost puppy (even though he swears he does NOT) .
he’ll definitely demand you never leave his side so he can always be there to protect you.
“you’re so weak, you need me to be there to protect you at all times.”
you’ll just nod, enjoying your boyfriends presence. (he’s actually geeking over you aswell and the fact you grace him with your presence).
he takes you everywhere with him and doesn’t care about what anyone says. oh, aizawa paired him up with kirishima? you’re coming with. you can’t stay a second away from him before he’s rushing around like a headless chicken looking for you.
your biggest fan by far, anything you do he’s practically on the floor worshipping you. then the next second he’ll be calling your outfit disgusting in the sweetest way possible.
he’ll also deny the fact he’s a simp for you. one time, kirishima caught the poor boy gazing at you, dare i say LOVINGLY, across the room as you did a mundane task.
kirishima has never grinned wider than he did when he noticed this. your boyfriend noticed the quiet chuckles leaving his friend and turned towards him.
“what the fuck are you laughing at?”
“you stalking y/n!”
“I WAS NOT STARING AT HER.” sure… liar. you literally just outed yourself…
bakugou loved you, even though he shows it in his weird, weird ways.
SHOTO TODOROKI —
the sweetest, sweetest boyfriend ever. literally the ideal boyfriend anyone could have SIMPLY because of how doting he is towards his partner.
he’s absolutely enamoured with you. he isn’t shameful about it either! (referencing one of my other head-canons) .
this boy will downright show his love for you.
we all know shoto has a hard time with social cues, he blames it on his childhood and the lack of social times he had – always being isolated.
that’s also the reason why he doesn’t understand why he can’t stare you down like a hawk and not expect people to be slightly worried… why is he staring at you like he wants to eat you?
cuteness aggression is a thing. you both get it when you’re with each other.
you can’t believe you managed to secure this boy. he never opened up to just anyone, yet for you he made an exception. you flew that all the time.
meanwhile your boyfriend is still in denial you two are dating. every time you bring up your realtionship he’s blushing like a maniac and shying away from you.
your classmates notice the little things. such as you placing your phone face up only for it to be face down a couple seconds later because todoroki fixed it for you knowing you don’t want people staring at every notification on your phone (this is so me guys i’m sorry).
he is very attentive, he’s such a simp. he’ll pick up on the little things. sometimes, you feel like he knows you better than you know yourself.
there was definitely one time you had been making yourself a snack in the kitchen, forgetting to get one of your favourite piece of food for the snack .
once your snack was made, you frowned at the missing piece of your food you wanted.
starting to get upset, you looked around for something to make up for this.
“here.” a soft voice spoke causing you to relax at the sound of todorokis gentle tone.
“i can’t find my-”
“y/n. here.”
you looked at your boyfriends hand, noticing he was holding multiple variations of the missing food item you craved.
your lips trembled at his thoughtfulness and you pulled your boyfriend in for a hug as he returned it with a smile on his face.
he’s too sweet for you and such a simp!
a/n: guys, bare with me if there is spelling errors. this was not proof-read! i hope this was good enough, it was kind of short.
SEND REQUESTS! 🤍🤍
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sreidisms · 23 hours
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Stress Release
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Sub!Spencer Reid x Dom!GN!Reader
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Summary: Spencer needs you to take care of him after a rough couple of days at his new job.
Genre: smut
Word Count: 861
Warnings: pegging, reader is GN but uses a strap-on so?? afab implied, slight cum play, slight overstimulation if you squint, many many pet names (sweet boy, love, sweetheart, darling, baby).
A/N: I needed something to get my creative juices going because I've been in the worst writing slump of my life, so enjoy this quick little blurb of the cutest, subbiest Spence <3
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Spencer was splayed out on your shared bed, his previously-gelled hair tousled and spread out on the fresh sheets like a halo around his head, however juxtaposing the current situation he was in - it was far from holy as your strap-on was gliding in and out of him with lewd ease.
The excuse from your boyfriend was that he needed the stress fucked out of him - maybe not put as crudely as that, but you knew what words were floating through his head. Paperwork, cases, and meeting people had been too much for the new agent, and he just wanted you to fuck him dumb for a while, for positive psychological purposes only obviously.
“How’s that feeling, sweet boy?” you cooed, pressing his knees further back to get the right angle to hit that lovely spot deep inside his abdomen.
“Mmm … g-great,” he mumbled, licking his lips and letting his mouth fall open once again.
“That’s good, Spence. Keep your legs like this, please, love.” Your hands moved to hold his slender and naked waist, thus providing you with the perfect leverage to smoothly thrust the thick dildo into his tight hole.
Pegging had been a recent addition to your sex life and you had been surprised when Spencer brought it up one day, timidly explaining how he had stumbled upon it online and wanted to try it out; little did he know, you had been dreaming about that scenario for months. With gentle steps and a good amount of research, it soon became a favourite activity for the both of you.
Spencer didn’t know why he liked it so much. It was probably a mix of being able to let go for once in his life and let someone else do the taking care of, he reflected. And besides, it was nice to not have to think about the logistics of something for a change.
For you? Oh, you loved watching your bright and loquacious genius be reduced to whines and pants every once in a while. It wasn’t a secret that he overworked himself and so you wanted to allow him the space to lay back when needed.
Now, one of your hands had found its way to your boyfriend’s throbbing cock, setting a relentless pace, up and down to give him more relief.
“O-Oh fuck,” he whined as he grasped your arm with a tight grip. “Don’t … stop, d-don’t …” His sentence was cut off when your thumb stroked the underside of his tip, forcing out a guttural moan and a harsh thud as his head hit the mattress again.
You hushed him. “You don’t have to worry, darling. Just relax, I’m here to make you feel good.” He nodded frantically, sucking his lower lip with his teeth to stifle the noises that were begging to escape his mouth.
As much as it was embarrassing, you were sure that your neighbours on the floor beneath your apartment could hear the never-ending squeak of the bed frame grinding against the linoleum, but you couldn’t care less in that moment. Your mind was set on bringing the highest of pleasures to your boyfriend as you skilfully hit his prostate over and over, each push of your hips punctuated with a moan from Spencer.
“P-Please …”
“What’s wrong, sweetheart?” you asked worriedly, quickly cupping his cheek with the hand that was resting on his waist. “Are you close?”
“Uh huh … please, please l-let me …” The sentence died at the back of his throat.
“Go ahead, you’ve been such a good boy, you deserve this.”
You stopped your actions for a second and swiftly pulled him closer to you from his legs, accidentally ramming the tip of your strap-on painfully hard against his sweet spot. It wasn’t your intention but cum gently dribbled down his flushed dick as he panted.
In an effort to not leave him with a ruined orgasm, you planted your fists on the bed, Spencer’s angelic face between them, and you hiked your knees up onto the edge of the bed before picking up the pace once more and driving the fake cock deep inside him.
“O-Oh …” The man was too far gone drowning in pleasure to have the energy to make noise, eyes screwed shut and fingers fisting the sheets.
“There we go,” you purred. The feeling of more cum being fucked out of him spread across both of your stomachs, creating the most delicious mess you could imagine.
You eventually took pity on him and slowed down your hips and teasingly pressed on his legs to spread them further, pulling back to see his weeping length softening against his porcelain skin.
“You did so well, Spence.” You took your pointer finger and spread the viscous liquid across his tummy, and then slowly traced it to the head of his cock. His hips bucked forward and he hissed.
“D-Don’t … sensitive.”
You giggled and leaned down to give him a soft kiss. “Sorry, baby, you’re so easy to tease.”
Spencer’s eyes opened to meet your loving expression and he smiled in return. “I love you.”
“I love you too, always.”
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I hope you enjoyed this! I promise I'll get to writing all the suggestions in my inbox eventually, it means so much to me that people show interest :) thank you
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wasabi-gumdrop · 2 days
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thinking about modern au Kabru
ivy league college student, probably studying law and political science on a full scholarship. first time living away from Milsiril so he has to promise her, yes mom i’ll call you at least four times a week, no mom i don’t need your amex black card, yes mom the normal credit card is fine i need to learn how to budget like a Normal Person (it has a limit of $20k — that’s not normal Kabru).
Milsiril insists for a long time that she’ll just get him a house off campus so he can have his own space (aka a place she can drop by anytime and possibly live a few months out of the year just to be close to him) but Kabru puts his foot down and tells her the best way he’s gonna make friends is by living with other students (bye mom).
his floor in the coed dorms is the party floor and he always makes sure to invite everybody (his nightmare is accidentally leaving anyone out and having them think that he doesn’t like them). somehow it’s always a good time, everyone leaves with more friends than they came with, it never gets totally out of control, and plenty of girls who are interested in him (and a lot of guys too tbh) bring tons of baked treats so there’s always free food. Kabru is the RA’s favourite person to have in the building (even though Kabru himself is messy but most of the people he’s friends with are nice and clean up after themselves).
he has a porsche (Milsiril gift for his 16th bday) but he’s adamant about not driving it unless he absolutely has to (because he doesn’t wanna look like a douche). BUT he never says no when his friends ask for rides (so he ends up driving all the time anyway). he actually contemplates selling the porsche and going for a more practical car but Mickbell is like ‘dude you are not taking this away from me.’ Kabru sighs and decides to keep it because his friends (Mickbell) like being chauffeured around in a fancy convertible (Rin, Holm, and Dia don’t care, they’re just glad they don’t have to walk to the grocery store).
he’s probably on a casual texting basis with most of his professors and you know he’s going to all their office hours, grabbing beer with them just to keep chatting about life outside of school. and that’s how he winds up in some super secret faculty group chat where he’s now privy to all the college administration gossip.
Kabru is elected for student council during his freshman year and he’s probably the favourite to be sc president one day.
he doesn’t really date (gets too in his head about how he doesn’t wanna ruin any friendships) but he does hang out one on one with a lot of girls and treats them all really well. he probably goes so far out of his way to be platonic that he flies a little too close to the ‘Just Like One of the Girlies’ sun, he kinda forgets that most people interpret it as flirting coming from him. which leads to a few awkward conversations. people feeling led on, a few angry jealous boyfriends, scathing dms about him being a girl stealing homewrecker.
it’s such a nightmare for him and he needs it to end right now. so he begs Rin to ‘date’ him for a week or two and then publicly dump him just so the entire student body gets the message that he is Just A Friend.
Rin stares at him for a few seconds. then she laughs. she laughs and laughs. she laughs for a crazy long time. and then eventually she goes, ‘wow you’re an asshole, Kabru. no i won’t be your fake girlfriend. you’re gonna suffer and i’m going to enjoy it.’
and that’s when Kabru has a moment of enlightenment. ok yeah. asking for that is probably really selfish and mean. maybe he needs to think about girls’ feelings more and that’s maybe more important than his deep seated need to be liked, and when has Rin ever been wrong about anything.
he apologizes. and so begins one of the more serious talks he’s ever had with Rin about being okay with not being liked.
he thinks he can really turn over a new leaf. the whole ‘not worrying about what other people think’ thing goes pretty well — up until Kabru meets the aloof professor for his Monsters and Myths class who keeps forgetting and mispronouncing his name.
Kabru has never needed someone to like him So Bad, he needs Prof. Touden to like him as a matter of life and death, and he’s willing to look stupid for it (fails a midterm on purpose to justify begging for one on one tutoring)
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blackhairedjjun · 2 days
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staying afloat - k.th
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pairing: kang taehyun x gn reader | genre / tropes: angst, argument -> makeup, implied friends to lovers, office worker!taehyun, the subtlest of love confessions | word count: 899 | warnings: burnout and exhaustion from overwork
part of my 300 followers event (event masterlist)
prompt - HEAT: while engaged in a passionate argument with one another, sender, in the heat of the moment, blurts out “i love you!” to the receiver. think of like, that glorious trope where people have a huge argument and then suddenly sb drops the mic with “because i’m in love with you!” and silences the other person. u know the trope! (requested by anon)
author's notes: HI ANON im sorry this took sooooo long. as i said, this was hard for me to write bc i already did the heat prompt twice before and i didn't want to be too repetitive with the arguments... the argument here is a bit calmer and more one-sided on yn's part but i hope it still works!
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“you are running yourself into the ground, taehyun!” you grab his shoulders and give him a little shake. taehyun watches you closely, and you can see the darkening circles under his eyes. 
he’s still standing before the threshold of your home, right in front of the door. with just one step he could walk in if you weren’t blocking his way. outside, the night air is so cold that you shivered instantly upon opening the door for him. the sky is dark, with neither moon nor stars, and the only light comes from the fluorescent bulb at the doorway.
“y/n, you’re up working too,” he says. his voice is steady but firm. “you can’t tell me what not to do when you’re also working like this.”
“i’m doing overtime for just one night, for god’s sake. but you 一 you’ve been so busy and tired for what, two weeks? you forget to answer my texts. forget!” you throw your hands up. “and you’ve never forgotten before, not in all the years that i’ve known you.”
taehyun stuffs his hands into his pockets and his gaze flickers away from yours for a second before it returns. though he tries to stand his ground, you notice the soft look in his eyes, laying bare the tiredness and worries weighing down on him.
“well, i’m here now. why won’t you let me make it up to you?”
“because it’s one in the morning and you’ve been staying up late for overtime and extra projects for what, two weeks now? you go home late and you wake up early, your boss dumps all this work on you, and you barely get any time off!” you take a step closer, now fully exiting the warmth of your home, to stand so close to him. “please, taehyun. it’s not that i don’t want to see you, but you’re so, so tired. i can see it in your face.”
you reach out to touch his face, but his expression goes taut and your hand hovers just inches away. he turns away from you before you can scan his eyes for the tired look you saw; a cold breeze blows by, causing both of you to shiver and pushing the bangs away from taehyun’s forehead.
he looks... sadder than what you remember. you remember how easily his face would light up before he took on his new position at his job; he would smile at the smallest of your remarks, his big eyes sparkling like jewels. you thought of the steady stream of texts from him day after day, reminding you to eat or commenting on a silly photo you took, and how that stream soon turned into a trickle. the memories make your body feel heavy.
taehyun says nothing for a few moments and just lets out a sigh. when he looks back at you there’s a pained look that wasn’t there before, and you feel an ache in your chest at the sight.
 “y/n, i... i don’t want you to worry about me like this. i can’t... i can take care of myself. please, please just trust me. i hate watching you worry like this.”
“oh, you hate watching me worry?” your tone rises before you even realize it. “and i hate watching you turn into this! you’re exhausted, taehyun. you’re not yourself anymore. i can’t even remember the last time i saw you smile! do you know how much it hurts to see the person you love lose himself like this?”
you tremble in your spot and your words start to trip over themselves. your emotions pile onto each other, keeping you from speaking straight: some anger, yes, but mostly disappointment, worry, loneliness, fear. “i ha一 i hate seeing you like this, taehyunie. i can’t一 i can’t watch一 i love you too much to see this一”
taehyun cuts you off to pull you into a hug. he holds onto you so tightly, as if trying to wrestle you away from the emotions gripping you. one of his hands makes his way through your hair. angry tears prick at your eyes but you relax in his hold, finally letting out a sob.
“i’m sorry,” he says, his hand combing through your hair then rubbing your back. “i know you’re just looking out for me... and you’re right. i am exhausted...”
something shifts and now you feel his full weight on you. now you’re the one holding him, his head moving to rest in the crook of your neck, his shoulders fully slumped. the weeks of exhaustion have finally caught up to him, and you wrap your arms around his waist to prop him up.
“i’m sorry, y/n,” he repeats. “for not... listening to you... for forgetting...”
your hold on him tightens and tears stream down your face, but you manage to speak. “i just don’t want you to hurt yourself...”
neither of you say anything more. taehyun doesn’t let go of you and sinks fully into your touch; despite the chill night air, he’s still warm in your arms. you let your tears fall freely as you keep a firm hold on the friend you love, as if letting go of him means he will sink and drown.
the night is so quiet that the murmur he lets out against your neck still comes out loud and clear.
“i love you too.”
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sunflowerxthoughts · 2 days
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So I’m going to add a bit to the lore of work!Uncle Wayne reader, a Eddie. A bit sad though.
When you leave the next day, Eddie is all questions about you.
“Why did you not tell me you worked with the woman of my dreams Wayne?” So much for not getting his hopes up.
“Where the hell did you think the homemade food came from, son?” Wayne smirks. “I told her in passing I had a nephew so she started bringing double the food at times.”
“Detail orientated too.” Eddie dramatically leans back on the couch. “Is it too early to want to marry her?”
“A bit, yeah.” Wayne laughs. “I think she is just a very caring person happy that she can finally take care of someone.”
“Who takes care of her? Does she have parents?”
“It’s um… complicated.” His smile drops. “It’s her story to tell though. It’s always the more caring ones that get taken care of the least.”
“Oh.”
“Yeah. I always worry about her, you know? Somedays she comes with this big bags under her eyes, and she says it’s fine. It’s always fine, even when I can tell it’s not. But I get it’s hard to open up at times.”
“I’ve never seen her out and about.”
“She doesn’t have many friends, and you know Hawkings, not the friendliest of people…”
“Well she is great, so it’s their loss.”
“I know you see it that way, Eds. And it is, she really is great. But when you are in that place so much, you start to feel like you’ll never have friends.”
“That stops now. I refuse to let someone so… so caring and sweet to feel not noticed, unwanted. It’s not fair Wayne!”
“Just don’t break her heart okay? She has enough on her plate already.”
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Hello dearest kitty, I'm here begging on my knees for some fluff
Okay okay I'll stop, but it was a funny start especially after your least post, but I really love your writing and I would love to see you write some sub villain X dom hero fluff, about self care and maybe a little bit on self harm cuz I have exams and this is my comfort trope.
But regardless if you write it or not I want you to know that I really appreciate all your work and I it makes such a huge difference in my life, you're one of the people I can look at and be happy 😁💖
tw mention of self-harm
“This is…nice.” The villain frowned and hugged their own legs, almost as if they had never been in a bathtub before. Still tired, they leaned against the tiles of the bathroom wall. All the hero could focus on were their lashes when they closed their eyes.
Admittedly, the hero hadn’t considered this to be the result. They hadn’t expected to end up in bed with their nemesis. It would have been easier if this was part of a mission, they reckoned. But fate was much crueler.
Now feelings were involved. Complicated, difficult feelings. Sometimes they didn’t know if they should blame themselves or the villain. After all, the villain was devoted and passionate. They were tactical and brilliant.
And they were also pretty. Ridiculously pretty.
The hero swallowed.
Why was this happening to them out of all people?
“I don’t think anyone has ever made that kind of effort for me,” the villain said. They smiled and the hero’s heart dropped.
“You mean letting in some water?”
“Well, yeah…and the breakfast. The soft kisses. The massages, you know?” The villain looked at the hero again. “No one has ever done that for me.”
For the hero’s taste, they were too far away from each other. Even though the bathtub wasn’t the biggest, the hero didn’t want to sit on opposite ends. They worried their bottom lip between their teeth.
“Can you come closer?” they asked and the villain nodded, obeying quickly.
The hero let out a shaky breath they didn’t even know they were holding once the villain sat down on their hips. At this point, it was like a drug. The hero craved this affection and these hands on their skin.
It wasn’t just pleasure, it was something more vile. Something that could bleed and die, something that could destroy the hero within seconds.
A few hours ago, they hadn’t realised it. Not really. But now that they knew they weren’t just attracted to the villain, they needed to control themselves.
“You know you deserve it, right?” they asked. The villain didn’t meet their eyes, though. “You deserve nice things.”
“Is this a separating-work-and-personal-life-thing? Because we both know I’ve done despicable things in the past.” The villain looked ashamed. They let their thumb run along the hero’s biceps, almost as if they could distract themselves that way.
“No. I like you the way you are. Even the parts you deem ugly.” The hero touched the scars the villain had tried to hide yesterday gently. They couldn’t stop looking at their nemesis. At their perfect face, their perfect body. The hero wasn’t sure why their melancholy was taking over the now.
Yesterday, they’d been laughing and kissing. They’d never had that much fun in quite a while. But now, responsibility weighed heavy on their shoulders again and they couldn’t bear the feeling of saying goodbye in a few hours.
“You’re just saying that to make me feel better.”
“Have I ever been dishonest with you?” the hero asked. Brilliance wasn’t a gift. It was the result of hard work and the hero could appreciate and respect that the villain had been working just as much as they had. Both were the same in that aspect, destroying themselves because that seemed to be logical: working until you had results. No failing, no mistakes. 100%. All the time.
The villain smiled softly. Maybe even sadly.
“When you told me you love me yesterday?” they asked quietly but the hero already shook their head.
“No, that wasn’t a lie.” Their finger traced one of the villain’s scars. Somehow, the bathwater was getting hotter and hotter. The hero closed their eyes as they tried to calm down. “You’re lovely.”
It was only natural, wasn’t it? To be attracted to someone who challenged, yet matched them in so many ways? God, the hero was really at the end of their rope.
“Hm. You know, under all these layers—” the villain touched their chest “—of calculated and raw reason—” they drew a heart with their finger into the hero’s skin “—there’s a very gentle soul inside you.”
“Is that criticism or a compliment?” the hero asked. Again, looking at the villain made their stomach turn. In a good way. Kind of.
Their nemesis smiled.
“Just an observation,” the villain said. They leaned forward and kissed the hero’s cheek. “Thank you for taking care of me. I kinda suck at it.”
The hero’s hand was still on the villain’s scars.
“You just need a little bit of help, that’s all. Everyone does.” The villain was still so close. If the hero moved their head a little, they’d be kissing.
Hell, why was their heart beating so fast?
“Do you think I could be better?” the villain asked. “Do you think I could change?”
“Change is inevitable,” the hero explained. “But I…I got you.”
They held onto the villain a little tighter this time and honestly, they knew why their heart ached when they brought them home.
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shycroissanti · 1 day
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I know you like to be welcoming to everyone, but it’s okay to not ship your OCs with everyone else’s. I can’t imagine how overwhelmed you get trying to make everyone happy. And I also can’t imagine how many people are struggling for your attention when you make a new character and the only interest they have in it is shipping. It sort of breaks my heart to see you make a new oc and the only people who seem to care about it are people trying to make a ship.
I see you’re getting burned out more often and taking a lot of breaks… but your blog should be a fun place, not something you avoid because you’re stressed by it. Maybe limiting requests or only keeping OC ships to good friends would help you relax. You don’t have to take my advice if this makes you happy. I’m just a bit worried about you. Especially since you seem tired all the time and recently made a post saying you were worried about people being upset with you if your characters already had ships and you didn’t want to add any more.
I would also like to say that some people like the shipping because they just want free art of their OC and less because they actually want to bond with you. Many people do not realize they are being like this.
Your real friends will not be bothered by you putting up boundaries. The only people that will be upset are selfish, too young to understand, or people who didn’t consider your feelings at all.
Just take care of yourself, Shy. I’m sorry if I’m overstepping. And of if I have this totally wrong, just say so.
You're right, I recognize that I've been doing this lately...
It's a fact, I'm very afraid of making others upset, I really want to please everyone. I've actually been feeling a little overwhelmed lately, but I don't know how to deal with it.
I love making ships with my OCs with the OCs of my moots, I really really like this interaction, I was just getting worried about the situation where more than one person wants to make ships with a single OC, I'm afraid of causing confusion with that.
I'll get better with this, I swear, I even want to tell you that I've been trying to be more like you, you know? "Post what you want" I've been trying to do this more often and it's making me happy🥹
I have several plans for the future with my OCs and I'm optimistic about that, even if I'm still a bit clumsy at communicating, and I'm pretty sure that everything I wrote here must be a little confusing because it really took me by surprise, I really value your attention and words so much and after I read everything (including what you said in the other posts too), I started crying, in a good way❤️
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morphodae · 2 days
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Hello!! May I request something for black butler? Reader usually being quite non-confrontational and energetic but has a bit of a possessive streak. Not toxic level but sort of unintentionally intimidates people that flirts w/ their partner even when they know they’re taken like staring down at them from behind their partner or being passive-aggressive, and then just goes back to being their usual self once the other person’s left.
The characters being Claude, William Spears, and Lawrence Bluewer (you can replace him with Sebastian if you don’t write for Lawrence).
Tysm and sorry for the long request!! Feel free to delete if ever ^^
Protective Passion
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Sorry it took me a bit to get to this. I’m not entirely caught up with Lawrence and the Public School Arc but I did some research :) I hope you enjoy! Thank you for requesting 💜
Claude Faustus 🕷️
On the surface, Claude doesn’t seem to care much for your existence at all.
He’s a demon who knows he’s can take the form of a handsome man - which he has - and who could charm anyone he sees fit. Only, he usually does this in order to make a contract. When you came into his life, he surprised himself at how… endearing your qualities were to him.
As said before, he knows he has attractive looks and charm and it isn’t uncommon for people to try and flirt with him. It usually ends the same way: with his unblinking stare and some remark about business at hand; you don’t need to worry. He knows that he’s taken by you.
As a demon, he can be quite possessive; it’s a natural instinct for him. So when he sees you of all people becoming instinctually protective over your relationship with him, he feels an odd sense of pride well up into his chest and a small smirk cross his face.
You needn’t worry, dear. Claude has already claimed you as his long ago and no mortal, demon, angel, or otherworldly being is going to come in between that.
William Spears ⚔️
More likely than not, your relationship with him would have to remain secret and private. It took a long, long time for you to even worm your way into his heart. He’s supposed to remain impartial and adhere to all rules, after all.
On the rare occasion that he isn’t busy as a Grim Reaper, he does try to take you out on private outings. Usually, these “dates” consist of private, scenic spots around London or even an indoor date at your home.
If, by chance, an individual disturbs your outing with him and even flirts with him without taking the hint, and William sees you become protective, he will quickly take you elsewhere as though not to escalate the situation.
He’s flattered at the thought you’d felt the need to be possessive of him, but he’d rather avoid conflict of any sort. To him, he will tell you that no one else stands a chance with him. He, an avid rule follower, has already broken the code of impartiality by being with you, so there’s no need to doubt his unwavering affection for being with you.
Lawrence Bluewer 📚
Ah, yes, another avid rule-follower who values tradition in academic and personal settings.
Lawrence is definitely attractive in a booksmart sort of way, and his knowledge and stoicism might even be seen as attractive to others initially.
If a person doesn’t take the hint that you two are a couple while you are there, and you feel the need to make snide remarks and stand your ground, Lawrence won’t really know what to do.
After a moment, he will fix his glasses, clear his throat, and excuse himself and you from the person causing issues. Despite his best wishes, his cheeks are a faint shade of pink and he’s mentally berating himself to maintain composure.
He appreciates your devotion to him and is surprised that you seem so fiercely loyal, but he also would prefer if you follow proper etiquette in social situations. Don’t get him wrong, he adores all aspects of your personality, but he still does put traditions on a pedestal.
In the end, you receive a light scolding as his significant other and a light peck on the cheek before the two of you go about the rest of your day.
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ldrloverrrrrr · 2 days
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can we fall in love? pt. 2
formerly known as be my baby !
matt x female!oc
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moodboard is at the end bc i couldn’t fix it😭
song for the whole series:
ABOUT: the girl who believes she’s unlovable meets the boy who can’t take his eyes off of her and has too much love to give but can’t admit his feelings for her.
A/N: sorry if this is long, let me know what you think about the story so far and what you want to see. Thank you for reading <33
MATT:
“so do you skate?” i asked just wanting to her voice more. “nah i just like the vibe here plus it’s good for painting because there’s no old people telling me i’m ‘wasting my youth’” i laughed at that. Chris told me that nick was calling asking where we were but i didn’t want to leave Ava yet so i let him walk ahead telling him i’ll meet him at the car. “sorry if this is too forward because we’ve just met but do you wanna grab something to eat later? me, my brothers and a few friends are meeting for pizza in south end.” i bit my lip hoping she’d say yes. “sure! i’ve not got anything planned, i’ll give u my number and you can text me the details” silently celebrating we exchanged numbers and i caught up to chris. “i invited ava to dinner later with us!” i said to him excitedly, “matt.” “what?” “you so have a crush on her” “no i don’t what?” i lied “you’re blushing like crazy and all giddy” he replied, i just shoved his shoulder and walked around to the drivers seat. We hoped into the car on the way home, all i could think of was her and how i excited i was to see her again, but then i thought what if she thinks i was being weird by asking her so many questions? is she actually serious about coming? maybe it was a mistake. we got home and i felt my phone buzz.
Ava
hey!! what’s the plans for later?
i was instantly relieved, until i heard chris walk in and said to nick “matts in loveee” while making a heart with his hands, “shut up chris” i nudged him, nick was too distracted with something on his phone to care. “nick we met a new friend and i invited her to dinner later, if that’s ok with you?”
“yea no problem what’s their name?”
“ava”
“oooo ava” he teased
“not you now” i rolled my eyes
“what’s she like then” he said putting his phone down and walking over to the counter where i was sitting.
“we met her at the skatepark she was listening to lil skies so obviously we went over, she was doing some graffiti too it was really cool you should’ve seen!” chris mentioned
“i can’t wait to meet her then!”.
AVA:
i walked back home with mila telling her about the boys, “he sounds really nice” “i know right he invited me out for pizza later but i have no clue what to wear” mila stopped and squealed “ILL HELP YOU!!” i immediately agreed and we ran into the apartment. i put some songs on and she started to pick out some options from my closet, after deciding on my clothes she did my makeup all nice and i sprayed some perfume. “now listen, if anyone tries anything sneaky call me and i will beat their ass, no joke” she said deadpanned, i giggled “ i’m sure i’ll be fine mila” she wrapped her arms round me and sighed “sorry for ditching you tonight, i need a new job honestly this is killing my social life” i laughed and said “don’t worry about it” i looked down at my phone to see matt texted saying he’s outside i quickly replied and said bye to mila, running down stairs being careful to not fall down. chris waved through the window and pointed to the back door. “hi guys, thank you so much for inviting me!” “hey i’m nick, you must be ava?” i turned to my left “yes nice to meet you! oh my god i love your tattoos” he thanked me and i looked forward to where matt was to see him staring through the mirror at me, when i noticed he swiftly averted his gaze saying “ok are we ready to go?” “yep all good” i responded. On our way chris was playing songs on aux while i got to know them a bit better. “so what brings you to LA” nick asked “well honestly scotland is depressing as hell and i love the vibes here but most of the reason was my family” i took a pause before talking again “i’m just not that close with them” i didn’t want to fully unload my trauma onto them, i had only known them a few hours, “what about you guys, matt told me you’re from boston?” nick explained their reasons and by the time he was done we arrived at the restaurant. hopping out of the car i met their friends and we went inside. i decided to sit in between matt and chris in the booth seats and we ordered. in my head i was super nervous to eat anything infront of everyone, it had always been something i just couldn’t get over for some reason. i hadn’t realised i had zoned out before i felt a familiar tap on my shoulder “hey, you okay?” matt asked “oh yeah sorry i was just distracted” “you wanna talk about it?” he offered “oh no it’s nothing thank you though” why was he so kind to me, i had known him for under a day, i don’t know if it’s just because i’ve never had real friends but i felt almost guilty by being there. After eating i excused myself to the bathroom and their friend madi came with me. She was literally gorgeous, like something straight out of a magazine we instantly clicked and she really welcomed me into their group. “ava, i think matt likes you” she whispered “what?” “i don’t know for sure but he kept admiring you and he was super excited telling us about you before we went out” i didn’t really know how to respond so i just laughed it off. someone liking me felt other worldly, i was constantly teased at school and made fun of so it fully drained me of any expectations but madi seemed so sure. On the way home chris handed me the aux cable “since we already know you have good taste in music” he chuckled, i scrolled through my playlist and played ‘broken clocks by sza’ nick instantly turned to me and yelled “OH MY GOD I LOVE SZA” “STOP ME TOO” we started belting out the lyrics, matt and chris just laughed and we drives through the dark LA streets before reaching my apartment block. “thank you so much for the night, i had a lot of fun!” i hugged nick before jumping out the car and waving to chris and matt.
MATT:
2:00am
i was laying in my bed unable to sleep because i couldn’t stop thinking of her. i was listening to music until i heard my phone vibrate.
Ava
thank you sm again for tonight, see ya soon :)
My heart started beating fast and a smile plastered across my tired face before i replied and drifted off.
AHH LET ME KNOW WHAT U GUYS THINK 🤍🤍
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Please do a no nut November with daddy larz please please please….
A/n: Sorry it's so short, I hope you enjoy it nonetheless <3 I wasn't gonna add to the NNN thing but I had to for Lars, Danish princess is so pretty <3
Warnings: Smut, hand job, public sex, if you think I missed anything let me know otherwise enjoy!
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Lars had heard about this stupid challenge through some friends. He tried to shut down the idea but his friends seemed pretty into it, thinking it would be fun to try. Seeing that his friends wanted to go through with it had him thinking it over.
He couldn’t get the idea of it out of his head and kept thinking about it his whole walk home. In theory it would be easy for him, his band was just getting started which was cool but they weren’t at the stage where people were throwing themselves at them or anything. He didn’t have a partner, not even someone he’d like to have as his partner. It would be easy, right?
As the month went on he kept the challenge in mind, checking in on his friends and how they were coming along. Sure enough by week two one of them failed, only fueling Lars’ ego with how easy this would be.
He was walking around his neighbourhood, thinking about this and that and the other thing when he noticed a garage sale. It was about noon, it was fairly busy as there were quite a few tables set up all filled with things. What caught his eye was the person he saw taking the money.
He swears he’s never laid his eyes on someone so beautiful. He came over, pretending to look around while he tried to think of something to say to start a conversation with you.
He couldn’t help but stare, eavesdropping on conversations just to hear your voice, your sweet laugh. Feeling someone’s eyes on you you glanced around before landing on Lars. His face flushed and he looked down, pretending to be uninterested.
You chuckled to yourself and went over to him. “Can I help you with something?” Lars just stared at you with a goofy grin.
“Uh, no, I’m just looking.” He replied after a long moment. “Um, why-why’re you getting rid of all this?” He asked, wanting to keep the conversation going.
“I’m going to college soon and I don’t need all of this.” You explained.
The both of you kept talking and eventually exchanged numbers. Over the next week you kept talking and hanging out, getting closer and getting to know each other. Another of Lars’ friends was out but he didn’t care, he had a pretty girl under his arm.
It was the night before you were supposed to leave for college and Lars wanted to take you out for one last stress free night. “Promise to call every day?” He asked. You were sitting on the hood of his old run down car at the top of a hill looking over the city like a cheesy romance movie.
You chuckled and nodded. “Yes, I’ll call you every day.” You leaned your head on his shoulder. His arm was around you and he pressed a kiss to the top of your head.
“And you won’t find someone else?” He asked, a hint of worry sticking in his voice. “Not even if they’re taller and handsomer?” You knew this was a genuine fear of his, that you’d find someone better. It was still early in your relationship but that didn’t mean you were still looking, didn’t mean you wouldn’t have to tease him a little either.
“Mh, maybe.” You could feel Lars tensing a bit and he looked down at you. “I might need a little...” You trailed your hand up his thigh to his crotch. “Extra incentive~” This was definitely not the time that Lars wanted to be reminded of the challenge he and his friends had taken part in.
“Um, well, I just-” He stopped himself when you squeezed him through his jeans. You palmed him through his clothes, listening for what made your favourite sounds leave him and when you found one you liked you kept with it.
Lars was squirming a bit, reaching for you while you played with him. There was a road not far away, people passed by every now and then.
Lars’ moans were getting louder and he knew he shouldn’t, there was only a week left in the challenge and you were leaving. He reached for your hand and shook his head. “I-I can’t.”
You raised a brow at him. “Why not?”
“I-it’s this stupid challenge my friends told me about, I can’t, you know, until the end of the month.” He looked up at you and you couldn’t stop staring at his pretty eyes, plush lips and flushed cheeks.
“That’s stupid.” You said bluntly and kissed him. His arms wrapped around you and he held you close. “If not tonight then when?” You asked, pulling away slightly.
You undid his jeans and pulled him out of his underwear. Lars stared in awe as you started stroking him. You wanted to go slow in case he wanted you to stop but his head fell back and he began to moan again.
“Fuck, go faster.” He groaned, glancing down at his leaky cock in your hand. You sped up your pace, once again looking for that perfect sound. “Fuck, fuck! Fuck, ‘m gonna-ngh-gonna cum.” You kept the same fast pace and watched intently for his pretty, red dick to explode all over him.
Just as his high rocked through his body a car pulled up beside you guys. You put yourself between him and the car and quickly shoved him back in his jeans.
The people in the car next to you knew what you’d done but didn’t say anything and let you both sulk back into Lars’ car.
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raayllum · 2 days
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After S4, Soren's character was just reduced to a doofus. There isn't any arc going on for me. He is just there. Do you think that there is an arc for him?
blog housekeeping: tags masterpost / dragons rambles / foil tags / in regards to (discussions of race / racism) / fandom history / no discourse or harassment / please don’t send me negativity about the show and/or cast and crew
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Points at "character development is not the be-all end-all provided you're still getting character expansion and a better understanding of their current worldview/characterization" + bonus "seeing how arc 2 Soren is different than arc 1 Soren"
In S4 and S5 we see:
Soren being much happier and outwardly goofier now that he's not trying to get his dad's approval
Soren stepping up to be Ezran's prime defender (4x01, 4x03, 4x09, 5x01-5x04) and good friend *
* While Soren and Ezran are friends, we have every reason to believe Soren is not going to rely on Ezran for emotional support, and there's extra layers here of Soren being Ez's knight / Ez being his true king
Oh no, you mean the character who avoids thinking about how uncomfortable and stressed he really is (s1, s2, s3) is avoiding thinking about how uncomfortable and stressed he really is now that his family's back in the picture (4x07)?
Soren's season long arc of Not Knowing vs Knowing continuing into S4 and S5
Showing anger, love, despair, and resentment towards his family members ("I know you love magic, but I hope you're careful, because it can change people" / "I was worried okay! And I missed you!" / "But it's not too late to change, please, I know you can change!" / "They were a step ahead of us. They're always one step ahead")
Him and Rayla actually having a dynamic / friendship now
"Soren definitely seems like a feelings-y protect-y kind of guy." "Yeah, you're right, that's not really his style." → "I meant with Callum. Look, when you left, you hurt him bad. Real bad. He was miserable."
Him leaping into a fight to defend an innocent dragon whereas before he was decidedly the aggressor
His developing dynamic with Zubeia and taking on more of Ezran's side of things with human-dragon reconciliation
Soren reaffirming his view of his father but also how that's made Soren more knowledgable and compassionate (through Elmer)
Like Soren is coping better bc he naturally fronts with confidence (1x01, 2x02, 2x07, even some of 3x09). I even love the growth we have from "so I picked on you cause I didn't know any better" to "He's cruel, but you don't have to be". Soren has matured in his view of his own actions and of others, even if he still has some room to grow within his own very black-and-white worldview ("It feels good to be one of the good guys this time").
I could talk more about Soren and his arc within s4 and s5 in detail, but I'm not gonna cow to a rule breaking ask so... try again more nicely maybe and we'll see?
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luce-speaks · 1 day
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kliff and the friends
last minute submission for day two of @fe-aspec-week 2024!! this one is a little thrown together because i had an idea at the last minute but! here goes!!
Kliff has never been particularly fond of other people.
He used to think he just got unlucky, stuck in a tiny village where no one understood the concept of personal space. He dreamed of the day he’d escape them, get out, go anywhere but here, and meet people who were actually decent.
Then he started going to school in the next town over, and with each new person he met, that dream died in front of him. Each and every one of them—over-familiar like Gray, clumsy like Tobin, naive like Alm, or disgustingly romantic like Faye. He hated it. He came back to Ram Village with a disappointed letter from his teacher and a new will to tolerate these idiots so he could safely ignore the rest. He might not fit in, but at least they know him well enough to leave him alone while he’s reading.
The war comes on suddenly, like a storm rolling in overnight, and things change. Kliff learns what fire spells can do to a human being, and Gray stops joking about hitting Tobin with his sword, and Faye picks up a lance for the first time, insisting she’ll do whatever it takes to protect her friends. Tolerable acquaintances become battle-allies, people you can trust to have your back. People who could die beside you, any day. There’s no room out here for petty bickering, but sometimes it also feels like there’s no room to get attached. When the war is over, Kliff thinks, they’ll go their separate ways. He probably won’t even miss them.
Tobin flags him down at camp one day. “Hey, Kliff!”
He rolls his eyes. “Tobin. I thought you knew not to interrupt me while I’m studying.”
“Yeah, yeah, I know. But I have questions about magic! That counts as study time, right?”
Now Kliff is intrigued, though he refuses to give Tobin the satisfaction. “Since when do you care about magic? I thought it was too complicated for you.”
Tobin settles beside him, keeping a safe distance, but not bothering to ask whether he minds the company. “Well, I don’t really get it. But I want to learn. You know—for the war.”
He sighs. “I don’t know what Alm or Gray did this time, but you’re better with a bow than you’re ever going to be with magic. Focus on getting better at that.”
“Healing magic,” Tobin corrects. “I want to learn healing.”
“What? Why?”
“C’mon, seriously? I’m worried about you guys! I want us to go back to Ram when this is all over—all of us, together. Even if we’re not all planning to stay.”
“…All right, then. I can try to teach you.” Kliff grins. “Though I wouldn’t count on your ability to learn it.”
Faye catches him off guard in the middle of an overcrowded mess hall. She’s saying something, but he can’t understand her over the din of too many hungry soldiers. Eventually, she gives up and beckons to the door.
Kliff follows her, plate in hand, out to the cool night air. “What was that for?”
She shrugs. “You looked like you wanted to go outside.”
“I—” He pauses. Mess hall never used to bother him more than any other time around camp, but now that they’ve been getting more recruits, it has been getting louder and louder. He’s never liked loud noises, either. “I guess I did.”
Faye walks a little farther away from the tent, towards the woods. He follows her, and they settle together at the forest’s edge—still in earshot of the camp, but safely away from the clamor of the mess hall.
“I miss Ram,” Faye says quietly, after they’ve been eating for a bit. “Seeing this many people in one place reminds me how far we are from home.”
Kliff snorts. “It just reminds me of school. They always crammed too many people into the common areas for lunch.”
“So you didn’t like leaving then, either?”
“I liked going to school,” he answers. “I didn’t like the people there.”
“What kind of people do you like?”
He thinks on this. “The quiet kind.”
Faye smiles and nods. They eat the rest of their meal in silence.
Gray looks out for him during fights.
At first he’s convinced Gray is just showing off, jumping in dramatically and kicking down a mage in mid-chant before they can fire another spell at Kliff. But then it happens a second time, and a third time, and Kliff is more than certain that it’s intentional.
“You don’t have to do that, you know,” Kliff says, the next time Gray takes a blow for him.
“Do what?” Gray asks. “Look super cool while I’m saving the day?”
Kliff regrets that Gray is too focused on the battle to see him roll his eyes. “Protect me. I can look out for myself.”
“Oh, that? I’m just practicing for next time one of the girls needs saving.” Gray pauses to skewer another incoming mage. “Gotta keep my skills sharp and all that!”
“Gray, I’m serious. Can you stop joking around?” Kliff fires off another spell, stopping an approaching cavalier in their tracks. Now there are no more distractions—Gray will have to talk to him.
Gray turns to face him. “Look, I know you can take it, okay? But that’s not your job. If you’re up in the front lines taking hits, you won’t have the energy to cast your spells. So you do your job, and I’ll do mine, yeah?”
He sighs. “Fine.”
“Great! Now how about a ‘thank you’ for saving your ass?”
“In your dreams.”
Alm brings him a book from town.
“Here,” he says, unloading it off a pile of rations and weapons. “They had this on sale at one of the booths. I thought you might get some use out of it.”
Kliff inspects it. It’s a neatly-bound red tome, with gold embossing on the front. It looks well-used, but it’s holding together nevertheless. He flips it open, skimming the table of contents, and frowns.
“I hate to break it to you, but this is a book on magical theory. It’s not going to teach me anything I don’t already know about battle casting.”
Alm looks a little offended. “I know,” he says. “I just figured you would like it. You liked learning about magic at school, didn’t you?”
“I did, but—” He frowns again, turning the book over anxiously in his hands. “We’re in the middle of a war. Did you spend army funds on this?”
“Don’t worry, I spent my own money on it. No funds wasted.”
“But—” Kliff stammers. “Why? What’s the point? What do you get out of this?”
Alm sighs. “It’s just a gift. We may be at war, but we’re still people. I want you guys to be happy—at least, when we’re not having to kill people.”
“Oh,” Kliff says. “Uh. Thanks.”
Alm smiles, bright as ever. “Any time.”
The war continues, and Kliff keeps dreaming about the places he’ll go once he’s free to travel as he pleases. He’s not sure what kind of people he’ll meet out there, but—he thinks—if they’re anything like the ones he met in Ram Village, he hasn’t got anything to worry about. Other people may be unpleasant—clumsy, naive, romantic, and over-familiar—but they’re still worth knowing, every once in a while.
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tvrningout · 2 months
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what if… i said i might wanna try writing on discord… how would we feel
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transmechanicus · 1 year
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“I’ll be fine i just need to uhhhhhhh idk kill” but like…what if i did haha
#my stuff#dear diary and the several thousand mfs who can see it. Despite arguably good academic performance today feels like a bad day#bc i skipped lab to take a nap#and i feel lonely and incapable of connecting more than superficially with my classmates#like i can talk to them and i do and we get along well but i never…hang out w em#or at least not as much as they seem to without me#it’s not a malicious thing i think a huge part of it is groups of ppl living or working in the same space#and i’m in a different lab building than a lot of ppl#idk…struggling to find anything that sparks joy. unable to see the future with optimism#it’s just day after day of Job where i’ll beat myself up on weekends if i don’t do Even More Work#bc that’s the nature of grad school. always homework or literature review to do like i give a shit abt the latter#i don’t care what other people are doing i don’t wanna obsessively comb through journals to make sure i’m doing Brand New Shit#i want it to stop#i don’t want to read anymore. i don’t wanna have to worry about my job outside of work.#i want to cry and scream and#like i don’t wanna quit after i worked so hard to get here#i don’t wanna wuss out#but i’m always tired. i’m never rested or relaxed or truly enjoying myself#why is this only hard for me…how tf is everyone else able to read and remember and understand this much??#like yeah maybe i should be on adhd meds but those are fuckin spensive and a pain in the ass to get#i’m tired of being tough#i want to curl into a ball and be told it’s going to be okay and that i can rest and have it not be a lie or a half measure
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vogelmeister · 3 days
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been feeling mixed on some of my friends recently
#i love them but im gonna explain#i don’t want this to boil over like the twins did#but one of my friends i feel so cast off sometimes#i get it bc shes full time adult job employed now#in healthcare no less#but im just getting fully annoyed at her lack of availability and it makes me sad#im getting even sadder actually bc she also always seems to have time to hang with her uni friends whuch hurts#like im like okay i know you have this from 6-7 so how about we meet for dinner at 7:30 bc i wanna see you casually and she says no#and i think i really need to talk to her bc it makes me sad and then i feel slapped in the face#even on nights out we always have to go home early. which my friend basically said:#i think in future if you wanna go home you can but others shouldn’t have to too#bc my other friend got so sad she was forced to come back early and i was like yea i would have liked to have sat at manly with yall#bc i feel we don’t do this any more#i honestly think it’s better to just let her figure it out and go#i don’t want me to sweep so much shit under the rug until i despise her#bc i know this isn’t her fault i just wish she would let loose or make an effort#my other situation is my childhood best friend#i love her a lot she’s amazing. but but but. sometimes i feel she can be too protective of me.#it comes from a place of knowing me for so long#and i do trust her opinions on people who i surround myself with bc she fucking hated those twins#but sometimes i feel she has been treating me differently since my neurodivergence diagnosis#even with a certain high school friend she held this dislike even when i said she was not like the twins#bc she was hanging out with the twins at the 21st#like this girl was also having her issues with the twins and was the person in the firing line of the breakup#even when i was in nl she was so worried about me and its nice to have her have my back#bc after that guy kissed me directly on the lips she suddenly became concerned about ppl taking advantage of me#and its like to me great she cares but also i did in fact learn from it#but she gets super defensive when ppl take advantage of me and i just wanna her to step back#i just feel sometimes i don’t need her feeling like she needs to protect me or that i need to hang neurodivergence up like a flag#idk its a lot. thank u for listening
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