#i dont wanna be disrespectful about it but i have no fucking clue how to actually be good about it

[vypridae]

i, as a non-aroace person, would like any aroace people (or any aro people, or any ace people) to come inform me of how i would be able to RESPECTFULLY and ACCURATELY navigate alastor's aroace-ness in making content of him, including shipping content /gen

#unfortunately my brain will not stop going 'ah gay' every time i see alastor and angel together #but iwanna do it respectfully and i dont wanna erase his identity someone help please #alastor #hazbin hotel #xanchats #i dont wanna be disrespectful about it but i have no fucking clue how to actually be good about it #honestly so scared to ask this cuz ik like half the fandom would stab me in the throat with an angelic spear for even THINKING of shipping- #-alastor with anybody at all. ESPECIALLY bc i ship radiodust

[sunlitewhispers]

Marvus and his money headcanon

(Been surfing through the marvus tags and I've got some thoughts to share regarding this clown)

To start off, I personally think troll currency is more digital than physical. Like everyone uses a card to trade or get items (and its only due to the empresses restrictions on things when she removed the adults from the planet) but physical money is still real, it's just a fun thing that highbloods and high midbloods use to flaunt and to trade amongst each other.

To signify the value of the bills, they have a strip of color from the cast they were made for. For example, Teals =80, Cerulean =90, Indigo =100, etc.

(There were coins that were common amongst lowbloods and low midbloods, but that got discontinued when moving to cashless/digital. There is evidence preserving the old currency existence such as in museums showings of the old times and extremely old paintings in the clown churches.) (You can think that these coins are caegars or not)

With that out the way! On to Marvus and his money 💰

I imagine Marvus doesn't really care about money nor feels that it has a heavy connection to his identity compared to performing/entertaining. Marvus just knows that people wanna see him and lose their shit at his concerts and are willing to drop stacks to be there even with the risk of being culled.

With that, Marvus can be loose with his money, quite literally throwing it around to which some highbloods would critique the act as 'disrespectful' and 'rebellious' since money is one of the ways ancestors can provide to descendants and give them a clue to their existence. (If they want or have left a will if they died, regardless, the empire still sets them up with a small fund)

I dont know if philanthropy would be an actual thing or just be a thing highbloods (like Zebruh) say they do for approval points. But I imagine Marvus would be the type to do so in the most unconventional means.

He probably stopped his tour bus once to grab a grubshake or a handmade sandwich from a small cafe and threw a fat band on the counter saying, "Keep da change lol." Leaving the workers there in awe and fear cause damn he just weirdly blessed them, and damn they now gotta fight off his fans from stealing the marvy money. (If Marvus is there, his fans are certainly gonna be there too.)

Marvus definitely buys his crew lunch or, if he's hanging with someone, offers to pay for them when he's out and about. He stresses tf out of his accountant because he doesn't keep track of how much he spends in a day. You know his ass absolutely has a money gun to use at his concerts.

Bascially when you're Marvus, you're a baller who is a big spender.

When interacting with Marvus, depending on his quadrant, you're gonna see how he moves with his cash.

•♡ Matespirit ♡•

if you got this man in this quadrant, good luck on getting Marvus not to spoil the fuck out of you. Trust and believe he'll take any chance to drop some stacks on you. If you guys are out and you say or point out some items, you can bet that Marvus is buying them.

Oh, you think that clothing line is cute? Guess what? He's ordered the entire line to be sent to your place.

Big fan of video games? No problem! He is getting the newest console out on the market in your favorite color with your name on it.

Love sweets? Bam! He's gonna invite you over to his crib and have you watch a team of trolls bake the best desserts of Alternia.

Money ain't a thang to this man. It gives him a chance to show his love through the material means and show that he wants you to enjoy yourself and time with him. Small part of him uses money to be a temporary fix when he has to go on long tours. If he can't spend time with you on troll FaceTime or in real life, he'll send gifts to show that he's still alive and thinking about you.

However, if large displays of affections through money don't appeal to you or you start to feel overwhelmed by the purchases or think he's being disingenious in his affection, he'll pull it back.

He'll likely give you a card that's connected to his account so you can have the control to buy what you want without feeling like you have to ask him. (And such an act will give him a small piece of security to know you'll have the means to survive financially on Alternia, especially if you've expressed times of financial hardships to him)

Also doesn’t matter if it's public or private, He's gonna randomly place bills on your person, i.e., stuffing them in your pockets, slipping them in your shirt pocket, pinning them to your jacket. If you ask him why he's doing that (or wonder where he stores his cash)(btw he literally has no pants pockets) Marvus is gonna give you a saucy wink and smile all dumb and say "a mf gotta pay dem feez 4 havin a wicked mate lik u b ;0)" than he'll place a smacking wet kiss on your forehead and be all noisey about it while doing so.

•◇ Moirials ◇•

In this quadrant, his spending habit might look casual to outsiders, but with you, they'll be a tad more personal. Still be extra af like in matespiritship but he'll be spending money to clear his mind or yours.

Feeling stressed about some unfinished work? Don't worry. He'll reserve a spa service just for you.

Need to cry out some hard feelings? He's gonna get some matching pajamas and grab some emergency blankets to get that session on.

You know that one ring that SpongeBob and Patrick have to show off their friendship? He's gonna get something like that to represent your guy's moirallgience. Anything involving moirails, he will buy and send them to you.

You're definitely gonna be his merch tester and probably be brought to his trips to the galleries when he goes to buy art pieces. (Need your support and opinion when bidding for art pieces.)

Like with matespiritship, if you feel like he's being insincere or rather prefers more handmade gifts. He'll try to schedule days to create personal gifts. He might pay someone to tutor him about your interests just so you can rant without having to stop and explain what you're talking about.

Marvus will remember what your favorite snacks and favorite meals are for when you're hanging with the crew or just him. Compared to where he won't care about what someone orders, you don't gotta worry about an order mess up or reminding him. He got that locked in, unless you want something different, then just point him to it.

If there is a fucked up order for you, he will raise hell. Typically, he won't care if something he orders is messed up. He'll pay for another one. However, on behalf of his moirial, this mf gonna walk up to the counter like that meme saying they asked for no pickles. The first and hopefully (in his opinion) only time you'll ever see him asking for a refund.

A thing that'll be a routine of your relationship is him swinging by your place late af in the daytime to grab you and get some breakfast before he has to start his night.(Unless you spend the day at his hive than he'll order said breakfast and catch some more Zzzs with you.)

•♤ Kismeses ♤•

Now in this quadrant, compared to the other two, Marvus is a clown who's mischievous as hell. This bitches antics are gonna be up to 100 when it comes to him.

Honestly, you're gonna be on your toes for buying things. It'll become a back and forth of him randomly, not having money than to him having it though being really annoying and lazy with it.

If your someone who's well off, you better hide your wallet. Marvus will snag your card and make an excuse how he left his cash in his other pants/trailer/hive and buy the most stupidest shit under your name. (He'll troll cash app you back but do it so tediously that you hope your account crashes)

If he catches a single hint or a word, even a wrinkle of disgust on you, Marvus will make it the bane of your life.

You dislike the residue of his paint left on your face after a hate-makeout session? Marvus now has to buy this one face paint that is known for being messy. what? His manager told him, too. :0)

You think cowboy boots are clunky and tacky? Guess who's strolling up in some bedazzled purple lined boots that jingle when he walks.

You make a comment on how creepy troll beanie boos plushies are, he's gonna get a brand deal with them and send you a crate of his new designs. A note will be attached saying "4 my numba 1 fan ;0)~".

Similar to moirallgience, you will be a merch tester, yet you won't know if he's being serious or wanting to rile you up. Regardless, when you shit on the design he's showing you, that's how he'll know his fans will love it! Doesn't matter if it's the simplest design, an eyesore to the public, he'll promote it to the point that even your small-time friends will surely mention the product to you. Might even send a shout-out to you on Chitter for your 'help'.

Don't ask him for a bill if you want something from a vending machine. Marvus will pull the most crumpled weirdly stained bill you'll ever see in your lifetime and smile at you plainly like, "Here u go buddi dats all I can find on me atm lmao." Additionally to this, he will slowly count his bucks out if you all are in a line somewhere. (Marvus knows no one will rush him and if you complain, he'll pretend he lost count and start over)

To conclude this, watch out for when he's feeling more petty. He'll make a habit of sending you items in loud peculiar packaging that suggest to those handling it that there's something inappropriate in it when there really isn't.

•♧ Auspistice ♧•

With this one, Marvus doesn’t fit the vibe of where he might truly kill his kismeses. Nor does he seem to want to be in a situation to be aggravated enough to join in murdering someone (Going off his response to MSPA reader when the clown fight happened). However, Marvus may strive on not becoming active on those emotions. Close calls can exist.

A tiff among his roadies about best faygo flavors is a good way. His manager hassling him, and trying to change up his brand is close enough. Groupie sea dwellers trying to follow him back to his trailer and not taking a hint is a real close call.

If you mediate for Marvus a few times, he'll certainly be grateful (and a bit embarrassed) he'll grant you a gift card of some shop of your choice as thanks.

On the other hand, you've been around long enough to spot a murderous Marvus, then you're undeniably a part of his inner circle. With the exception of being his paid emotional bodyguard coach.

As business-like, it might seem in the beginning, you're a trustworthy and skillful individual in Marvus's eyes. He knows dealing with irritated trolls, particularly enraged highbloods, is not a fun nor easy task.

Other trolls may feel like this relationship is wandering into moirallgience territory.(which might be) Marvus won't really care about those opinions and possibly offer to meditate for you in the event he catches you in a tense position.

You’ll be called for his long tours when he has to do shows for sea dwellers and, without a doubt, be put through the ringer. It'll end with you guys munching on loads of the troll version of ice cream in silence.

At any point, you're too stressed to de-escalate a situation. He'll give you a paid vacation and make sure you don't come back until you are entirely stressed free.

He may tell you once he calms down that you should open a private business due to your and I quote "motherfckin dopeazz obzi-va-tional skilz."

Small note : Marvus has dealt with people trying to form a quad with him just for the fame/money, as we seen with Zebruh. So if he catches signs that what's happening, he's going to be acting distant and extremely scripted around you, then like ghost you. You'll be blacklisted from his concerts (unknowingly), and future clowns might keep a close eye on you if you hang at the churches.

Welp, that's all! Hopefully, this was entertaining to read! I do apologize if some parts feel rushed or that there were more details in some quads, I tried to keep them around the same length.

#whistalk #hiveswap friendsim #marvus xoloto #hiveswap marvus #marvus x reader #Hiveswap headcanon #hiveswap #friendsim #reader insert #Quadrant talk #hs marvus #long post #Small mention of Zebruh #Small mention of sea dwellers #Would Marvus be a Troll Mr. Beast in spirit? #Trying to summon the xoloto vibes when writing speaking parts in this #MSPA reader mentioned #homestuck

[jujitto]

▬▬ [ 𝗔𝗧𝗘𝗘𝗭 ] MTL HOW MUCH I WANT TO FIGHT THEM!

𝖺𝗍𝗓 ⭒ ۪ ׂ ۪ genre ۪ ׂ 𝖺𝗇𝗀𝗌𝗍, 𝖼𝗋𝖺𝖼𝗄 ⭒ ۪ ׂ ۪ cw ۪ ׂ 𝗃𝗎𝗌𝗍 𝗆𝗒 𝗈𝗉𝗂𝗇𝗂𝗈𝗇 ⭒ ۪ ׂ ۪ wc ۪ ׂ 𝟢.𝟪𝗄 𝗐𝗈𝗋𝖽𝗌

MOST

SAN : He’s been bias-wrecking me a little too much for my liking. STAY IN YOUR LANE, CHOI SAN! Honestly, he can catch these hands but I'm kind of scared because he kind of feisty not gonna lie. Don't pretend y'all don't see the way he is ready to fight Wooyoung! 😭 And I know y'all seen the he kicked that guy in the bouncy music video. Probably pull out some karate//taekwondo moves on my ass. I still think I would win. Not fairly tho. My ass will be cheating. 🤷🏽‍♀️ ALL I GOT TO SAY IS HE BETTER DUCK BECAUSE I'M THROWING STUFF!

WOOYOUNG : I only put him second, because I feel like it would be fun to fight with him for some absolute reason. THIS BITCH PULLS HAIR, I CAN JUST TELL! OK, but I feel like play-fighting would eventually turn into actual fighting. Not going to lie I feel like he would win this fight because he’s crazy. You and I both know this motherfucker is crazy. WHY CAN I SEE HIM TRY TO SNEAK ME?!? 😭 If it doesn't become actually fighting, I feel like he would honestly somehow make me actually fight him. BRUH WHY CAN I SEE HIM BITING? WOOYOUNG IS INSANE. One bite and I’m swinging. And if he wins best believe I’m coming back for round 2 because I am not losing to him.

HONGJOONG : My bias. To be honest, I just wanna fight him just to be fighting him. I honestly wanna see who is going to win. Another feisty bitch. OK BUT WE WOULD PROBABLY FIGHT OVER THE FACT I BIAS MORE PEOPLE THAN JUST HIM. Why can I honestly see this though?! I kind of get the vibe of him saying if he wins I have to drop everyone else for him. Honestly I would try my hardest to beat him up because bitch the groups I stan are the groups I stan for a reason. I can see him getting his evil ass kids to help, especially Wooyoung. SEE THIS IS NOT WHAT WE FINNA DO. In regards to who would win the fight….no clue.

YEOSANG : HONESTLY WOULD FIGHT JUST BECAUSE HE’S TOO FUCKING PRETTY. How dare he be so pretty? It’s not fair. Probably would feel bad if I beat him up because he didn’t deserve it but at the same time he did, because why is he so pretty?! No one should be this pretty?!?? I CAN SEE HIM FIGHTING BACK THO?! I feel like he would curse me! I DONT KNOW WHY BUT I JUST GET THOSE VIBES FROM HIM! Sorry not sorry!

SEONGHWA : ANOTHER PERSON I WOULD FIGHT BECAUSE WHY IS HE SO PRETTY?! But I would honestly feel so bad after it because he stays getting disrespected by those members of him (he know who he is!) The only one member I would probably feel bad for fighting because he didn’t deserve it but he did deserve it if you know what I’m saying because no one should be that pretty and I mean no one!

MINGI : OK I LIED ANOTHER PERSON I WOULD FIGHT AND THEN FEEL EXTREMELY BAD ABOUT FIGHTING. just seems like a really good person until I just feel like fighting him. Would it be necessary? No but I would still fight him just for the fun of it. But then I would feel bad because. OK, BUT MINGI LOOKS LIKE HE CAN FIGHT BUT ACTUALLY CAN'T! TELL ME I’M NOT WRONG! Honestly, I can see myself winning this fight, but then at the same time, I see myself going to apologize to him after fighting him. Because he honestly doesn’t deserve to be fought.

YUNHO : NOW YOU AND BOTH KNOW THE REASON WHY YUNHO IS ONE OF THE PEOPLE I WOULD LEAST LIKELY FIGHT! Because he’s so damn tall. Why you gotta be so tall for?! If I fought him, all he would have to do is back hand me and I would be across the room. It’s kind of like that dog meme with that guy who asks his dog if he wants the ball and he throws it across the room and the dog goes flying after it that’s how I will be. Legit. SO HELL NO I’M NOT FIGHTING THIS TALL LANKY MF! HELL NO! YUNHO IS A NO-NO! 😂

JONGHO : ANOTHER PERSON I WOULD NOT FIGHT! I’m not fighting him because he can break apples in half, so what makes me think I can fight him!? If he can break an apple so easy what makes you think he can’t break me in half! I would literally be so scared for my life! Do you not see how ready he is whenever his Hyungs are doing something annoying?!? HE CAN FIGHT I CAN JUST TELL! YOU AND I BOTH KNOW HE CAN! 😭 So fighting him is a risk I’m not willing to take because I’m not ready to be sent to an early grave just yet OK…..OK!

LEAST

#kbookshelf #pirateeznet #❝ A T E E Z ❞ #ateez scenarios #ateez fanfic #ateez ff #ateez fic #ateez drabbles #ateez reactions #ateez imagines #atz ff #atz fanfic #atz fic #atz hongjoong #ateez hongjoong #atz seonghwa #ateez seonghwa #atz yunho #ateez yunho #atz yeosang #ateez yeosang #atz san #ateez san #atz mingi #ateez mingi #atz wooyoung #ateez wooyoung #atz jongho #ateez jongho #kpop imagines

[arttrampbelle]

I feel nrs shits on raiden because ed has a problem with the character personally.

Why? I honestly have no fucking clue.

Raiden isn't that hard to understand so im not understanding the big deal.

We can have him go dark but not liu? Oh yes because he's the special one. I forgot. 🙄😒😑

Everyone else can get at least something that makes them feel believable,even likable and flawed.

Oh but heaven forbid liu kang fucks up.

See this is why hc liu is better. Non god liu kang is better.

But back to raiden.

Why is it. Why is it. Whenever raiden makes a reasonable mistake,that anyone can make.You guys take it so hard?

And villainize him.

But if liu makes a mistake its the end of the world but never do the same. Like all is forgiven and forgotten. Emphasis on the forgotten part. 🙄

If any other characters do reasonably fucked up shit. And have decent character flaws. You guys dont bat an eye.

But raidne does it. Suddenly you shit on him.

He cant win no matter what he does,how you write him. Im starting to think you guys hate raiden because you have unresolved daddy issues,authority issues,or you hate to admit that a godly powerful being cant wipe you ass all the time and you *sarcastic shock!* might actually have to solve the problems yourselves?! Wow what a concept.

Like srsly tho. Raiden isn't infallible. But he isn't a fucking chump loser can't get shit done.

He could get shit done but he has a code of honor,rules he has to follow by(that he hates),he has so much on his plate. And honestly you guys never appreciated his character.

Like out of pure spite. Im gonna do raiden self indulgent stuff today. Just to spite people.

Legit half the crap we got in 12. We could have gotten with raiden if you guys at nrs bothered to fucking write him properly. Instead of being lazy selfish pricks with a bias and favoritism towards other characters. *couch liu kang cough* (like i love liu but not written like that,never like that. God liu? Gross. Humble monk warrior liu? Yes)

Because liu kang playing "savior and creator of everything" is disturbing,disgusting,and disrespectful.

Like srsly they are legit telling THE SAME FUCKING STORY AGAIN AGAIN AGAIN. SAME AS 11. SAME SHIT. oh but because its uwu brand liu kang. And not the real liu kang. Suddenly its ok?! No!

Legit mk12....os the same fucking thing. Just liu kang brand.

It's no exciting. Its not new. You guys are lying to yourselves.

We could have had any fucking god charactera in mk do the same shit. And get the same result.

You guys could have had this with raiden. But noooooooo. You wanna shit on a character for shock value and no reason. Gtfoh.

You could have actually done something worth a damn but nope. You only care about gimmicks and whatever carries your attention spans for five secs for a quick fix of serotonin because you can't fucking get thru your heads you are being manipulated by a fucking company that lost passion years ago.

But that's besides the point.

So yeah. Raiden.

I'm so sorry they never gave you the love they should have.

Tobias should sue for your trauma. (Half joking here people. Tobias was the one who created and came up with the idea for raiden in the first place. And layed many foundations for this game but is half heartedly given credit while boon steals (no pun intended) his thunder)

Raiden i am so sorry for your mistreatment.

*hugs him*

Srsly if you call yourself a mortal kombat fan. And you genuinely hate raiden Do us all a favor and throw yourself in the dumpster fire. Plz. Also block tf outta me.

Look as a shang tsung tsimp. I love many many other characters too. But raiden is a comfort character,tho i self ship with him too he is comfort character. So i won't tolerate slander and disrespect.

Anyways. Raiden....my thunderdilf.....you deserve sm better.

I hope real raiden fans understand this. And make more PROPER kontent for you. Unlike nrs. We will treat you right.

#mortal kombat #raiden #raiden mortal kombat #lord raiden #💙⚡thunder's devotion⚡💙 #vent #vent post #tw vent

[audible--silence]

Shrooms trip

I want someone else to make sense of me more than i can make of me

Shelter, food, comfort

Thats all that ya really need

Why am I thinking of Grace?

Is she my compass?

Why?

Does she even have a clue?

We’re all just collections of experiences and memories floating around this nonsense rock doing things till we inevitably arent

And in the middle of nowhere, disconnected from everything else, you dont need much. Simplicity is fine.

At least, if only for a little while

Criminal, how much should change for me and how much i should live, only to be faced with those i love, never changing or ever living more

A coin dropped, i always think im coming home.

This is only a time away. Everything i do I’m taking back home to tell to friends and show to family. What if me, now, out in the nowhere, is all there is? Im never going home? I’m starting again? god it feels so scary to think about all that ive made in twenty four years and to think about throwing that to the dirt

An odd age, 24 is.

Young enough to be a fool

Old enough to be a teacher

You thought you were good at chaos but you always need order. You need systems within chaos in order to feel safe. Is it hospo? Is it from dad? Is it from mum?

This is how i always wanted to feel

Awake, alive, thinking and considering

If there’s something in there causing you grief, remember that its in there anyway and the only way past it, is through

I wanna do shrooms w grace and w benj

This is how i wish i lived normally in day to day life with childlike curiosity and wonder, introspective intuition and warmth

“I can, so i do” - on kindness to strangers, with your old pal, barbecue andy

That phone screen is comfort and warmth for me

.

The old lady yelled at me from her humble, earthen home in the mountains

I didn’t understand a word she said

But i knew exactly what she meant

Pick up that banana peel

You had the good bit, you deal with the rest

Take pride in yourself

Treat your surroundings with respect

You’re visiting our land

Don’t disrespect us

Yes the banana might biodegrade

Yes theres bottles of tecate and plastic bags littering the floor

But the point remains

Do as your parents taught you and clean up after yourself

Treat the land well

Be a good guest

Be courteous

Check yourself

Think what you wish to be and act accordingly

Dont fucking stray.

She said. Loudly.

[beepbeepbeepeedee]

he may not even read this

whenever i think about you or our interactions, I hear this one phrase from Euphoria where Rue's mom says "You're not a good person, Rue."

and she said it with such pain, while rue facially responded with hurt behind the guise of apathy. That parallels us. I tell you all the ways you hurt me and treat me and yeah you show apathy in your face but i can see how it makes you so mad. but i can also see how you won't let it hurt you, and you lash out with your abuse tactics. like rue did. rue's response was to call her mom a piece of shit and essentially say that she at least has an excuse bc of her dead dad, and that her mom has none. I feel like i plead with you on my hands and knees to care about me and you're like "you know what sucks ? my life."

i don't think you have the sociopath aspd. i think youre a psychopath with bipolar depression. and you're so content not letting yourself feel that you make it my problem. i'm not your sponge. feel your fucking feelings you are in a world of your own making at this point. I know how your mom is, i know how your family is, and while you know what i've dealt with you have no fucking clue. i've given u the tip of the iceberg. i havent told you everything everyone has done to me because i dont want to make it a competition. but everytime i try to bring up to you you tell me i talk about it too much. like you have NO IDEA what i've been through. and you know the most of everyone. isn't that nuts

after a decade of friendship i shouldnt have to ask to be heard. i'm constantly screaming for help and no one hears me. and you essentially put on fucking earmuffs. i already made my mind up for when i'm going to die. but i wanna at least feel okay while i'm here. you have not only disrespected me yourself, but allowed others to and that's not okay. and i feel like you're only sorry bc of my reaction because i feel like u don't care about me, and u only see me as an asset or character witness

the other day you apologized for what M did and i told u to stop. because your apologies dont mean much to me right now. they're just words. but when i called u out on it you said that i was making the apology about me. anthony, if youre apologizing to me, who is the apology about ? if it doesnt make me feel better, stop it. i don't think i'll be able to believe you're sorry for a while. and that hurts me bc all i want is to be your friend. but youre not a good person so i don't even know why i want that. it's like i'm punishing myself and always apologizing for my attitude and feelings and behavior and you just get to be... Like That.

anthony, you're emotionally abusive. you've been amotionally abusive toward me for most of our friendship and it hurts because all i've ever done was try to be there for you. you abuse my love for you and it's like you refuse to call it abuse but that's what it is

you hurt me and make me feel worse than my parents ever have. and that's saying something. and i've said this and it's like you don't care. and you also hide your feelings like you'll be so passive agressive and fucking rude to me and if i bring it up, it's like "i'm not mad, you're being dramatic" and you get all angry when i call you out and say very true things. you just never wanna hear the fucking truth and i am exhausted of putting all this energy towards you and you dont even use it. spellwork to help you, words to help you, it's like i'm only useful when i shut the fuck up. that's not okay. you drain me and i keep letting you

idk how much more of this i can take. because i don't fucking deserve it. you have to be better. i need you to be better. YOU need you to be better. and if you don't read this all the way through, this friendship is over. forever. no "maybes" no "finding my footing"

if you don't read this and hear me out, or if you come back at me on some yelling shit, just don't consider our friendship done. i love you and i need you to listen and not throw ur weird silent tantrums FUCK

#do//nt re//blog

[eremiie]

As a person who didn't enjoy the ending, here is my take: if we look at chapter 139 alone, with no prior context or knowledge of the story, then yeah the chapter is great. But knowing that the entire aot was literally a commentary on real-life stuff, like war, corruption etc, the entire "Let's forgive Eren, even though he started a genocide and we were against every single of his actions like 2 chapters ago, but he did this for ussssss so he is for sure a good guy" kinda iffy.

I don't even wanna talk about the entire smiling titan/ Carla fiasco, because this entire thing was so unnecessary for the plot?? Like, this is the final chapter, why are you creating a fucking plot hole?? This entire detail made Eren a much more unlikable character than before, in my opinion. AND I LIKE EREN.

As a conclusion: for me, it felt like 138 chapters of world building and character development were thrown out of the window so we could get some sort of a happy ending. I feel like a tragic ending would have been much more satisfying, maybe if all of the titans (by that I mean their human bodies) had died as well?

With that said, constructive criticism is always a good thing, but I've been seeing way too many "fans" attacking Isayama directly. This may not be your ideal ending, it's not mine either, but it's his. And that is ultimately the only ending that matters, so take it or leave it ig?

hey, im glad you were nice abt expressing ur opinion hehe, i appreciate that a lot

aot 139 spoilers

i actually think it’s the exact opposite, when you look at every chapter in addition to 139 it’s a great chapter because everything clicks, eren’s motive, the way he acted, mikasa, armin, everything in between.

i explain the whole “let’s forgive eren” thing here if you wanna read that!

an excerpt from what i said was that; 

“armin (and everyone) thanks eren for doing what he did to free them. not thanking eren for for mass murder period. it’s because of eren that the curse is lifted and that they are free and that’s what armin’s thanking eren for. mass murder is inexcusable, and eren knows that. that’s why after he panics and goes “but i dont want to die!” he comes to a realization that all the people he killed didn’t want to either, that the only way to atone for his sins is by dying himself. even if he didn’t die he would’ve probably been executed, or imprisoned for the rest of the life. just like in mikasa’s ova, “eren’s death is inevitable, no matter what reality you go to eren will always die because he carries death within himself.”

in another translation of the chapter armin thanks eren for being the bad guy so that they could win. he knows what eren did was bad. he’s not excusing it, he just understands why eren had to do it and that eren had no choice if he wanted them to be free.

from the get go freedom was one of the themes of eren’s character. if eren lived the whole entire world would be ruins and eren would’ve been even sadder than now, there would be nobody and it would’ve been worse than it is now. eren killing everyone was definitely not the ending to go. the ending we have could’ve been executed differently, sure, but in my eyes since i get the gist i think isa did an amazing job portraying what he had in mind.”

they were against his actions because they didn’t understand them, since eren spoke to all of them through paths, yes even the rest of the alliance, the same way he spoke to mikasa in 138— we just only got a glimpse of mikasa and armin’s talk bc they’re the main characters alongside eren in a sense

and i explain the carla thing in this post, and here’s an excerpt from that!

“one thing about isa’s writing style is that nothing is ever handed to you, everything is foreshadowed and you use context clues. it’s actually a pretty common style of writing— you give your reader 2+2, not 4. he mentioned it because you should’ve understood that part— eren sent the smiling titan to eat his mom because in the scene when the smiling titan had went into the walls the first person it should’ve ate was bertholdt. bertholdt was on the ground when the smiling titan had walked passed him— and usually titans are supposed to eat any human they encounter in hopes of finding a titan shifter to revert them. if the smiling titan had ate bertholdt it would’ve disrupted the path that ymir laid out for eren, messed up future events and the ending of aot wouldn’t have turned out like the ending of aot (with eren freeing his friends and breaking the curse of ymir), so he had to keep the smiling titan moving forward and his mom happened to be the next human she encountered, therefore his mom had to get eaten instead.

season 4 episode 3 

in chapter 139 eren says “it wasn’t bertholdt’s time to die yet.””

i can see why you would want a more tragic ending, i understand how it can feel like everything that happened was thrown away— carrying on such a tragic story you’d probably expect a tragic ending. however i will say isayama did mention years ago that’d the ending would be bittersweet and he delivered that, as well as the fact that in my opinion everything kind of led up to these events; isa gives you hints throughout the whole entire show, and those hints is exactly how i figured that 1) eren would die (i knew after watch mikasa’s ova that he’d die for sure) and 2) that the rumbling wasn’t eren’s real plan and that s4 eren wasn’t only a facade, but yeah i respect your opinion as well and ty for expressing it so well <333

and i totally agree ab the constructive critiscm part!! a lot of “fans” are doing to much on isayama and being pure disrespectful. it’s pretty disgusting to see, thats why i really appreciate the way you presented how you felt, it was respectful and in a well manner— you’re awesome for that.

and right, it doesn’t matter how we wanted it to end, it’s the ending he gave to us and regardless of if we like it or not that’s not gonna change the ending— so like you said, take it or leave it!

#aot 139 #aot spoilers #snk spoilers

[adorethedistance]

Chapter 3: JJ Maybank is MIA - JJ Maybank x Reader

Photo cred: I didn’t have time to photoshop another Spiderman edit so I made this shitty moodboard instead.

Warnings: swearing, mention of terrorism

Words: 2494

Previously in part 2: The pogues know all about how Spiderman held your phone, but they don’t know about how he tried to wingman you on impulse. JJ is still acting weird but functioning as normal. So normal he managed to land himself in detention. Now you’ve got detention too, and if this goes on your permanent record colleges will see you were punished for ‘hate speech’ seeing as that’s what osborn wrote on the detention slip. Fuck physics. And fuck mr. osborn.

Snap peas, a protein bar, and a bag of goldfish, none of which do I remember packing this morning, lay untouched on the beige plastic surface in front of me.

“I’m so mad” I declare, sitting on the bench between JJ and John B, slapping the pink detention slip onto the table and sliding it towards Kie.

“You got detention for hate speech?” she asks looking between my exasperated expression and the offending paper. To my right, JJ is stifling a snickering laugh. Unbelievable.

“What are you laughing at? I wouldn’t have detention if it weren’t for you and your inability to prepare!” I raise my voice in frustration. I can’t help but smile. JJ’s grin morphs into a small but hearty laugh. His laugh is the best sound in the world, it’s contagious and it’s unique and it’s lovely.

“You got hate speech but on mine he wrote ‘potential terrorist threat’” the entire table bursts into full-on laughter.

“What the fuck did you guys even do?” John B asks between laughs.

“JJ wasn’t taking notes and Osborn yelled at him for it, so then he asks me for paper and everything is fine but then his pencil didn’t have lead so he asks me for lead but Osborn thought he was just talking to be talking in the middle of his precious lecture so he gets detention. Then I stick my neck out for him and try and explain that he was asking for lead but Osborn wouldn’t fucking listen and now colleges are gonna think I use racial slurs or something!” The group is still laughing at JJ’s and my new terrorist status but it quickly morphs into a group rage bonding.

“When I had him in freshman year, he called my dad saying that I openly disrespected him in class because I forgot my textbook that day,” Pope adds while he shakes his head, annoyed.

“Osborn is the fucking worst. Like, how can you be an advanced physics teacher if you don’t even believe in climate change?” Kie says spooning a bite of orange rice into her mouth.

“Well thanks for nothing guys, now he’s gonna be in a bad mood for our classes,” John B advocates for himself and Sarah, “You’d think that the later the class, the more he’d back off from being a dick but no! The first period students were pure evil and that means the sixth period ones are too!”

“Is ‘hate speech’ gonna be on my permanent record?” tiny slivers of hope are laced into every word I say. Everyone has slowly begun to pack up their things in anticipation of the passing period bell for 5th.

“I wouldn’t be too worried about it. Our graduating class has the highest incarceration rate of the whole school, there are worse things you could do,” Kie calmly waves her spoon in my direction.

“I mean… I guess so…”

__________________________

MESSAGES:

Y/n/n: I’m already outside of Osborn’s. I don’t wanna go in alone the door is closed

Y/n/n: Hello??

MESSAGES:

Y/n/n: You’ll never fucking believe who isn’t here

KieKie Palmer: Are you serious?

Y/n/n: JJ is the entire reason I even have detention today and he’s not even here!!

Y/n/n: The door is closed and I have no idea why I rlly dont wanna be alone with Osborn for two hours

KieKie Palmer: I’m sure he’s just trying to keep the temperature regulated. As for JJ I have no clue.

Y/n/n: wiufwenbcoijdc

KieKie Palmer: You’ll be okay. Do you want me to come with you lol

Y/n/n: Nah I’ll be fine

Y/n/n: Go secure that waitressing bag

KieKie Palmer: Will do chief

Everything will be alright. I inhale on 7 counts, hold for 5, and exhale for 10 to soothe my nerves. I read that helps with anxiety in a JAMA article once, I think? I can’t remember. Here goes the next two hours. Alone. With Osborn.

I use my body weight to lean back and pull the steel door open, stepping into the air conditioned science lab. I see that the only light on is the one in the back of the classroom. The front is completely dark with only the projector playing... an episode of Mad Men?

Glancing across the Promethean board I see Mrs. Kasmos, my AP English Language teacher, sitting in the front row watching the show intently. She’s sitting on the edge of her seat, consumed by the story. When she notices me in the doorway, she politely hops up and moves to pause the show.

“Oh, hey Y/n.”

“What are you doing here?” I ask bewildered at her presence.

“I’m here to step in for Mr. Osborn’s detention session today. Did you come here for tutoring?”

“No. I’m the… deten-ded student you’re watching. He didn’t mention?”

“He left me a list of the two students that I’d be watching over but I didn’t read it. Either they’d show or they wouldn’t and it seems you did,” she replies calmly, comfortably. How often do teachers ask their coworkers to babysit like this?

“Did he say where he was going?”

“He just said it was an emergency and he had to leave as soon as I could get here. He’s lucky 6th period is my prep,” Mrs. Kasmos’s voice is confident yet comforting; everything tiny detail about her adds a little edge to her generally soothing nature. Like how her hair is an ordinary chestnut brown, but the back has a tribal pattern shaved into it. Or how she doesn’t like to wear flashy jewelry but she has 7 millimeter gauges. She’s the coolest adult I know.

So cool she instantly senses my mood, “What’s up, kid?”

“Nothing much, I guess I’m in sort of a weird place… mentally.”

“You wanna talk about it?” I hesitate for a moment. Should I unload all of my feelings to her? I guess I haven’t really talked to anyone about this yet.

“It’s a lot…” I trail off, dumping my backpack onto the closest table.

“I’ve got time and I assume you do too.”

“Right. Well, do you know my friend JJ? He’s blonde and-”

“He walks you to class everyday?”

“Yeah,” a sheepish grin takes form on my face as I commend her observational skills. “So he’s been acting kind of weird-? I don’t know he’s just been a lot quieter than normal which, I’m sure you’ve seen the way he acts, he’s crazy,” I laugh, “and him being quiet worries me sometimes because…” wait, I can’t let her know about his dad. She’ll have to call CPS and god knows if I’ll ever see him again.

“He fights with his dad sometimes because his dad has a short temper- but they always make up.”

“So you’re worried the fighting might be getting out of hand?”

“No, no. I’m just worried that maybe he’s going through something that he feels I can’t help him with… if that makes sense?”

“Yeah, I get you. Has it been something you’ve seen with him and other friends or is it something between just you two?”

“Huh. I guess just us two,” I say realizing what she’s getting at.

“What’s been going on with you two?”

“The other day we were supposed to meet to film for this documentary I’m making and he just completely bailed and said he got stuck on the subway, but the next morning my friends all checked and there wasn’t a train that broke down that night which was kind of weird. Then he asked some weird questions about what I should ‘do’- oh yeah I met Spiderman the other night- and JJ asked me if Spiderman told me to ‘do’ anything,” I feel like I’m rambling but Mrs. Kasmos seems invested in what I have to say, so I continue.

“And this morning he seems super exhausted and way out of it like he hadn’t slept. And he usually has these bruises… which-he-doesn’t-even-know-where-they-come-from-he-just-bruises-like-a-peach...” I word vomit to conceal any trace of abuse.

“But he’s always got bruises and then today there was nothing. Not a single one- which is crazy because he hit his arm, like, yesterday before lunch, and then… you’re gonna think I’m crazy,” shying away from my next comment, I card a hand through my tangled hair.

“Try me,” she offers with a straight face.

“He seems… stronger? Maybe not ‘stronger’. I don’t know if that makes any sense, it probably doesn’t.”

“Well, what do you mean by stronger?” she prompts.

“Like physically, he’s always pretty gentle with me and we’ll just give playful shoves or nudges, but earlier he nudged me and I almost fell completely over but he didn’t even seem to have notice that he had pushed me that hard, which makes me think he doesn’t know that he’s stronger?” I finished with a confused expression. Mrs. Kasmos takes a brief moment to collect her thoughts before sitting up straighter in her seat.

“Well a lot of this sounds pretty typical of teenage boys.”

“It does?”

“Yeah. Do you have brothers?”

“I just live with my mom.”

“Well I grew up with two of them and let me tell you just how unfair life is,” she leans forward as if she’s about to tell me the Pentagon’s security clearance. “For girls, puberty is sad and lonely and miserable, but for them? It’s just the miracle of ejaculation and overactive hair follicles.” I laugh at her description.

“That’s so not fair!… but I guess if it seems like pretty standard puberty stuff, then I don’t really need to be worried.”

“From what I’ve seen and heard that kid is pretty self-sufficient. I wouldn’t be too worried,” she reassures me. As I continue to talk she exits the Mad Men screen to log out of her computer.

“I can’t help the worrying a lot of the time... I really care about him,” my tongue darts out to moisten my lips but I catch myself in the bad habit and reach for my lip balm in my backpack.

“Do you care about him as more than a friend? Possibly?” Do I? I can’t like JJ. That would ruin everything. It would make things awkward between us, tear the pogues apart, not to mention the awkwardness of going to mutual parties.

“I guess I’ve never really thought of it that way?”

“Do you think he cares about you as more than a friend?” Mrs. Kasmos says in a heavier tone. I figured she would ask prompting questions that would allow me to psychoanalyze myself.

“Maybe?”

“Think about any crushes or attractions he’s had in the past. Does that behavior parallel how he’s been acting with you lately?”

“It’s hard to tell. I mean he’s such a flirty person in general, I can’t always tell what’s just him and what’s the real ‘flirting’ him. I can only see when he’s hitting on someone else really,” when I finished, she crosses her arms and leans forward on the grey desk between us,

“Maybe you could just look at your interactions through that lens from now on. Just to see if that may be the case.”

“Yeah, maybe. Thank you for letting me rant, and I’m sorry I’m the reason you have to stay til 5:30,” I say sincerely. Mrs. Kasmos laughs in my face,

“Hah! No. Don’t be sorry. I’m not staying til 5:30, and neither are you. Go home, be with your mom, enjoy your evening.” Then she slides off of the rolling chair she’s in, and slips the computer into her black North Face backpack.

“I’ve gotta turn all the lights off and lock up, so don’t wait for me.” And with that I grab my backpack as she shoo’s me out the door.

__________________________

My room is extremely stuffy since the A/C unit broke a few days ago, which means I’m stuck in the opening and closing of the window hell. I press pause on the Harry Styles tik tok compilation emitting from my laptop, and I roll off of my bed to stumble towards the window; my vision temporarily leaves me. I am de-hydrated.

Shoving the rusted pin out from it’s equally deteriorated latch allows me to lift the window open ¾ of the way. I’m met with the sounds of airplanes and commuters and sirens and homeless men on crack. The ambient noise of life being lived can drive some people out of the city, but to me, it’s home. Looking out the window, I see the wilted succulent that sits abandoned on the fire escape.

Running to my closet, I put on my favorite sneakers before stepping back out of the window, and onto the metal grate. I crouch down and look closer at the plant. It looks as dehydrated as I am, and I offer my condolences.

Wait. Mrs. Aldony from next door keeps a garden on the roof. Maybe if I just leave the plant up there she’ll revive it. Brilliant idea, Y/n.

I grab the plant in my left hand and use my right to help me scale the narrow stairs of the escape. I live two floors below the rooftop, so the climb is quick and easy with a potted plant.

The roof is made of concrete and there’s no greenery in sight. Just A/C vents.

Then, I see it. In the far right corner from my fire escape entrance, a small bed of tomatoes and morning glories thrive between the crown of the roof and the entryway from the stairs. I jog over in excitement and place the little plant on the ground next to the garden bed, right where she can see it upon entry.

“Farewell little plant. May you rest in the care of poor old Mrs. Aldony,” I give the wilting shrub a two finger salute.

As I turn to leave I look up from the concrete floor that’s hosting the succulent, out onto the horizon to see the beginning to set. Golden hour is overrated, but just this once I take in it’s beauty without indignation.

On the building across from mine I see a shape, shrouded in the golden rays. The blue and red figure is standing exactly across from me on the building that faces mine. I wouldn’t have seen him before because I had my back to it. But now, as plain as day, Spiderman stands one building away, frozen, like me. He’s looking directly at me. The white ovals of his mask centered on my isolated figure. After an eternal moment of staring at one another, he jumps off of the building, shooting a web to swing past the apartment complex adjacent to the one he was standing on. His body weight carries him forward, hands thwipping rapidly despite his calm demeanor, and just like that, Spiderman is gone with the sun.

__________________________

Read the next part here.

A/n: Sorry this is so long and also so fast because we have a lot to get through for the next few parts! I’m picking up the pace in this one so I don’t bore y’all with four parts of nonsense so just pretend this one is good and then we’ll move on lol.

Taglist (strikeout means I can’t tag you): @jellyfishbeansontoast​ @swervavery​ @wh0reforharry @merismind​ @danicarosaline​ @o-b-x​ @beautyandthebleh​ @harrysbaby​ @sexualparkour​ @tomfreakinghollandneedsaoscar​ @sovuckie​ @obxmxybxnk​ @lovelymaybankk​ @rockyyc77​ @obxlife​ @cece-lives-here​ @obx-beach​ @ilymarkchan​ @yeehaw87​ @lopineapples​  @sspidermanss​

#YFNS fic #YFNS #JJ #JJ maybank #jj Maybank x reader #jj maybank fanfiction #jj Maybank fanfic #jj Maybank fic #jj Maybank imagine #x reader #fanfic #fic #writing #spiderman #Spiderman au #obx #outer banks #marvel #marvel au #outer banks au #rudy pankow #jj x reader #outer banks fanfiction #outer banks fanfic #outer banks fic #outer banks imagine #outer banks writing #obx netflix #obx fanfic #obx fanfiction

[rowaning]

The Complete Fiction of HP Lovecraft rated by me, someone who read them all* but has a terrible memory

The Beast in The Cave: uh a guy goes on a cave tour and finds a creature that was like a human that got lost and adapted to its surroundings. 0/10 just because im pretty sure there was another one with this exact premise and neither of them were memorable at all.

The Alchemist: dude achieves immortality and lives in the narrators basement and has pledged to murder his entire lineage or something. 4/10 the alchemy stuff was actually kind of interesting

The Tomb: im pretty sure this is the one where a guy starts hanging out in a tomb and like travels back in time/becomes one of his ancestors? 5/10 if its the one im thinking of i did enjoy reading it

Dagon: guy lands on a mysterious island with signs of a long dead civilization. 1/10 i do not remember what happened in it

A Reminiscence of Dr. Samuel Johnson: 0/10 i have no memory of this

Polaris: also 0/10 i forgot all about it

Beyond the Wall of Sleep: could be any of the dream focused ones. if its the one about the dude sailing into the void or whatever than 4/10 not too bad

Memory: ironically, i dont remember it. 0/10

Old Bugs: 1/10 for the title god i wish i remembered this one

The Transition of Juan Romero: i got nothing. 0/10

The White Ship: this might also be the one about the dude sailing into the void? i liked that one he lived in a lighthouse and boarded a dream ship and just fucking left it was fun. 4/10

The Street: uh i think really steep street that didnt actually exist. 3/10

The Doom that Came to Sarnath: i wanna say another one of the dream centered ones where a town discovers some old relics and blatantly disrespects them and gets exactly whats coming to it. 5/10 they deserved what they got

The Statement of Randolph Carter: ok this dude shows up several times. i think this one is about how he returns to his childhood home then travels back in time and creates a time loop paradox thing. 1/10 meh

The Terrible Old Man: uh some thieves harrass a weird old guy and get got. 5/10

The Cats of Ulthar: someone is mean to a cat in a dream city, all of the rest of the cats get revenge and are revered for the rest of time. 2/10 (-3 because lovecraft has a specific name he gives to apparently every fictional and real cat he encounters and wow i wish he hadn't)

The Tree: i feel like this is something to do with a person becoming a tree but i cant actually remember. 0/10

Celephais: yeah no i got nothing 0/10

The Picture in the House: also nothing 0/10

The Temple: nope 0/10

Facts Concerning the Late Arthur Jermyn and his Family: is this the one where the dude's great grandfather married an ape? i dont think so but im not sure. 0/10, -5/10 if it is that one cause that one was especially shitty

From Beyond: nope 0/10

Nyarlathotep: charismatic dude shows up and is like get in bitches we're going to the void. i love nyarlathotep cause hes the one who directly interacts with humanity and like wears a human suit or whatever so hes just some dude whos like hey im gonna feed you to azathoth 5/0

The Quest of Iranon: got nothing 0/10

The Music of Erich Zann: narrator makes friends with an old musician whos being hunted by supernatural forces. 2/10 because i remember it but it was just ok

Ex Oblivione: 1/10 for the title but i have no clue what it was about

Sweet Ermengarde: lovecraft's sole attempt at comedy. not to my taste like at all 0/10

The Nameless city: nope 0/10

The Outsider: also nope 0/10

The Moon-Bog: sounds cool, dont remember it. 0/10

The Other Gods: dude tries to find the gods of humanity where they live on a big mountain, actually finds them, is immediately smited by the Other Gods who protect the gods of humanity. 3/10 he deserved it

Azathoth: dont recall, 0/10

Herbert West- Reanimator: Arkham man Herbert West and his assistant ressurect the dead with little thought to the consequences, then get murdered by a band of said resurrected dead. 5/10

Hypnos: nope 0/10

What the Moon Brings: also nope 0/10

The Hound: still nope 0/10

The Lurking Fear: again, nope 0/10

The Rats in the Walls: dude returns to his ancestral home, hears rats, excavates the basement and finds out that his ancestors ate human flesh, eats his friend. 1/10 it was an interesting read but can lovecraft please stop calling cats that.

The Unnameable: no clue 0/10

The Festival: nope 0/10

*Under the Pyramids: ok im pretty sure this is the one with houdini which is the only one i could not read. i went into this mentally prepared for lovecraft's bigotry but i was not mentally prepared for him dropping harry houdini, avid skeptic who absolutely would have beat the shit out of him for this, into the middle of his super racist paranormal horror. -1000/10

The Shunned House: nope 0/10

The Horror at Red Hook: also nope 0/10

He: cool title, no memory of the story. 0/10

In the Vault: wow im bad at this. 0/10

Cool Air: still no 0/10

The Call of Cthulhu: kind of all over the place, there was a thing about artists and then a thing about a cop investigating a cult. 3/10 meh but ill give it a bonus for being a staple of horror fiction.

Pickman's Model: uh artist sees some wild shit and draws it and then it eats him. 2/10 i forget the details

The Strange High House in the Mist: if this is the one im thinking of, dude does a dangerous climb to find a mysterious house and meet the inhabitant who is kind of interdimensional and also being hunted by interdimensional things. also maybe the house eats people? 2/10

The Silver Key: another Randolph Carter one, and i think this is actually the one about him travelling back in time so idk what the other one was. 3/10

The Dream-Quest of Unknown Kadath: randolph carter goes on a quest in the dream world to find the gods of humanity and ask why they wont let him check out this cool city he can see from his window. lots of action and very wordy and went a lot of different places. 4/10 good read but extremely xenophobic

The Case of Charles Dexter Ward: guy investigates his ancestor who looks disturbingly like him, ancestor comes back to life and kills him and takes his place and a bunch of other stuff happens. mostly a dramatized genealogical study. 3/10 not bad, very suspenseful

The Colour Out Of Space: meteor lands on a farm, scientists get weirded out by it, everything in the area gets weird then dead, alien thing gets enough power from draining nearby life-forms to escape earth. fun twist ending. 4/10 bonus for being one of the better ones, detraction for writing out a 'rural accent'

The Descendant: nope, 0/10

The Very Old Folk: nope again, 0/10

History of the Necronomicon: very dry. fake history of lovecraft's fake book thats super important to a lot of the stories. 0/10

The Dunwich Horror: isolated witchy family has a kid who no one likes that grows up real fast. graphic descriptions of renovation. a horror gets unleashed on the area and the local folklore scholars have to deal with it. 1/10 nothing good enough to counter the xenophobia

Ibid: i remember this one. no idea what it's deal was. pseudo-bibliography? it was weird. 0/10

The Whisperer in Darkness: guy has a correspondance with another guy about local folk legends based on evil crab things. other guy gets straight up replaced by an evil crab thing and first guy doesnt even notice. imagine if you followed up on a scam email and didnt realize anything was up until you saw that the face of the dude you were talking to in person was a mask. 4/10 for the comedy this guy would not last in the internet age at all

At The Mountains of Madness: guy whines about penguins and how awful it would be if there were civilizations that predated humanity. also commits grave desecration. i get hit by the realization that if lovecraft was less of a racist coward he wouldve made a great speculative sci fi author. 3/10 i would love to watch that old asshole get absolutely torn to shreds by the monster fucker community

The Shadow over Innsmouth: Fish People! Leave Them Alone! Or Else! 5/10 the protagonist gets to live the dream by escaping human society and becoming an immortal fish person

The Dreams in the Witch House: dude rents an objectively haunted room, doesnt listen to people trying to help him, gets murdered by a weird rat. later they find a shit ton of bones in the attic. 2/10 meh

Through The Gates of the Silver Key: Randolph Carter transcends time and space, then de-transcends time and space and immediately gets stuck on another planet in the distant past, makes a long and difficult journey back to earth to find that his estate is being divided amongst his heirs. the comedy potential of a man stuck in an alien body dealing with a legal system that has declared him dead is not examined. 2/10

The Thing on the Doorstep: narrator's good friend marries a fish person witch who steals his body. thats basically it. 3/10. at this point im like wow these narrators really refuse to believe the heavily foreshadowed supernatural explanations that turn out to be correct huh.

The Evil Clergyman: dude is in a room. some ghosts (?) show up. dude has a UV light for some reason. Gets his face stolen i guess and just has to live with it. 5/10 for being absolutely buck wild and refusing to explain anything

The Book: nope 0/10

The Shadow Out Of Time: dude gets his body stolen by ancient scholar species. agonizes about it for a while. finds archaeological evidence of said species. finds a book he wrote while living with said species. almost gets eaten by something. 3/10 more cool speculative sci fi but lame protagonist

The Haunter of the Dark: you'd think id remember it bc this was the last one and i read it last night. oh wait, nvm i do remember it. dude finds an old box in a run down culty church and unleashes a horror that then comes and fucks him up. 1/10 meh.

#tw lovecraft #i have forgotten more than i can remember #which is on par for me

[selfcareparker]

okay fghsgdj yes you can say girl ! my pronouns are she/her :) okay but fr pause, i read this like 3 minutes after you posted it (or at least my notif said 3mins lmao) bUT IM IN BED AND I USUALLY HAVE MY COMPUTER OPEN WITH YOUR RESPONSE SO I MAKE SURE I ADDRESS EVERYTHING AND THEN SEND IN THE ASK ON MY PHONE HDGSJSH anyway, time to get my ass up 😔 but wait i find you so funny like honestly, reading that cracked me all the way up. and i feel the “lol” thing so hard!!!! idk why i do it all the time (i’m tryna stop) but i’ll say something with lol at the beginning and lol at the end... it might be a defense mechanism at this point lol (😔) AND (i need to stop with the uppercase too it’s not funny anymore) I DONT KNOW WHY I LAUGHED SO HARD JDHSK WHEN YOU SAID ALSO AGAIN HAHAHAH LIKE UR HAHHAH also my sleep schedule is not pretty either lmao but i’m homeschooled so i never have to get up for anything? hhdhsis idk but i’m glad you slept!! you need sleep!!

also (pls no i cannot) why did i not know what ykwim meant until i reread this?? like it makes so much sense- anyway! i think it’s so cool that you’re excited for university! idk why but i do lol like you’re getting ready for the future (masters degree and all that) & you’re (maybe) going to england anyway so that’s cool haha (hopefully when you go you can see your relatives 🤞🏾)

the fact that you get happy seeing my asks i- 💓💓

you make me wanna go to London & England so bad urghhhh like i’ve only been out of the country once (to Canada for a family reunion) but it sounds so prettyyyyy & i’m so sorry that cov*d is messing everything up and i hope you can see your relatives soon :(

now to address the whole english speaking/writing: I FIND THAT SO WEIRD DUHSKSJ i don’t know how an english speaking person could say that if you don’t write it 100% grammatically correct.... that it’s wrong? when literally, over here at least, WE’RE SO GRAMMATICALLY INCORRECT HAHHAAH in both the way we talk and write!! and lol you’re welcome,, AND THE PARAGRAPH DID MAKE SENSE HDHSJSH & your rant is fine because... that is actually a bit ??? bc no one writes with 100% grammar lol

OH MY GOSH (see this uppercase thing is addictive) YOU STUDIED LATIN FOR 6 YEARS??? that’s really cool 🥺 the way that you know/speak 3+ languages i- NOT EVEN 3+ LIKE 6+ (german, english, latin, french, serbian, italian, and everything that comes with latin lmao) even if it’s just a tiny bit like wowee. it is really fascinating!!! i had the opportunity to take latin and i... didnt. i took art instead BUT ONLY CUZ MY FRIENDS WERE IN THAT CLASS AND ART LOOKED FUN IM SORRY

PLEASE WHY DO YOU KNOW EVERYONE?? that sounds so fricking cool tell your mom (mum or mama it’s really fine lol) that she sounds awesome. i think Jamaica would be fun either way!! i mean it looks pretty from pictures? i was a baby so i honestly have no recollection hahaha

LMAOO NOT U SAYING THIS IS LONGER THAN SOME OF MY FICS- PLEASE GIRL IM TELLING YOU I VERBALLY LAUGHED HAHAHAHAHAH but yea you really don’t need to apologize i like reading everything you say 🥺 HDKSHS AND UR FINE WE WERE JUST TALKING ABOUT ME BEFORE uhhh hmm uhh lemme think i, well, i saw chaos walking yesterday (big tom holland fan over here) and it was alright.. my mom acted a fool at all the jump scares LMAO but it was funny... since i’m talking about movies (this is hella random i know) but i like shark movies HDKJSSJ my favorite is the meg (it’s so good ohmigosh) and the 47 meters down movies aren’t bad either... i have two younger brothers... iiiii AM IN LOVE WITH MUSIC PHEW anddd i’m homeschooled (i think i mentioned that lol) i think that’s a good amount ahahaha AND IM HUNGRY RN JDHSJ

now. please. let me address the edit. i just want you to know that.. when i talk about your fics and i finish them and everything i’m not looking for more? like obviously if you’re writing i’m gonna read it but you don’t need to feel pressured or anything (idk if you do) to put more fics out lol like they’re great and i’m just sending the praise bc i love the ones that are there :’) but i’m so happy you’re working through your writers block!!! yay so so happy for you!!! and PUHLEASE anything you write is fantastic, i feel the exact same way when i write but girl. you’re fine. it’s gonna be great. (idk if this made any sense but... okay)

(and my cousin calls her mom mama so it’s really okay hahah i even call my mom mama sometimes) (and where you got the number “16 sentences” beats me but i still cracked up) (is this me pretending i had tags? maybe) HAHAHAHA OK BYE ❤️❤️ why did this take me so long to send i have no clue, AND WHY AM I OVERTHINKING EVERYTHING I SAID SHAJSHSJ ANYWAY BYE btw i love us too... like iconic // lovely anon 💓

me reading this:

also the dedication you put into sending me stuff— like with the laptop and phone and ahsksk 🥺🥺🥺

i’ll update you when i’ve started uni btw, i’m getting more and more excited every single day haha but i still have 3 weeks until it starts and even then I’ll obviously have to get used to it and everything, but you’re making me even more excited about it sksjshsg

yeah i wanna go to england too dkshsh let’s be sad together over the fact the we can’t travel eksjsh😔😭 but hopefully the wait will make it even better in the end <33 also i talk to loads of relatives over the phone at least once a week so it’s not too bad for me! but i miss their house 😭lmao

and i knowww snshsh so many native english speakers just make so many mistakes— and obviously i get that some things are slang but some things are simply wrong ajsh, the thing is no one has ever told me that my english is bad (i know it’s not bad anyway, but i’m still insecure) or no one has ever pointed out any mistakes, but yeah it’s mostly just insecurity dkshsg but yes thanks for saying what you said (previously as well as in this ask)😌🥰

Okay now for latin— girlll i don’t blame u for choosing art over latin esp. when all of your friends are doing art as well!! I’d choose art over latin as well lol skshsg but in year 6 we had to choose between latin and french, and at the time i didn’t like french? which was dumb of me and now i wanna learn french ekdhs but i don’t regret choosing latin at all bc if i properly learn french one day then i’ll already know understand loads of stuff (or at least some stuff lol) just thanks to latin 😌😌 but still, art>>>latin skskshshgs

I wanna watch chaos walking too!!! But i don’t get when/where/how it’s out lmao, cinemas are still closed here so i’ll either have to wait or find it somewhere online... il*egally 🥰 i don’t have high expectations at all btw but i like daisy and tom and the dog🥺 so i think i’ll enjoy it

GIRL SHARK FILMS SHARK FOLMS SKSJSHSHS okay so there are a few classics i haven’t watched yet, and also a few new ones that i haven’t seen yet BUT I LOVE SHARK FILMS SO MUCH SKSHSGSGSKK the first like proper shark film i ever watched was the shallows (which i like but my brain is still too small to comprehend what happened at the end (i mean i get it but i just can’t imagine it— idek if you’ve seen the film but skshhs)) and after watching it three times it does get a bit boring (but now whenever i see pictures or videos of big waves i’m just waiting for a shark to show up like come ON SKSJSG

^^^that pic/scene really traumatised me sksjsh but i still like the film

I only watched jaws like a few months ago, and i get that it’s a classic and also that it’s old and they just didn’t have the best.. equipment or special effects or whatever but i mean... look at meg and then look at jaws.... no disrespect to jaws at ALL but the meg is so much cooler. (That one scene on the boat where the shark just JUMPS OUT OF THE WATER AND SKSJSHHSUSJHA i get such a shock every time it’s so good (and the dog aww aksjshssli 🥺🥺🥰 and the boy with the ice cream lmao he’s iconic)

47 metres down, wow, i liked that film too. (i’ve only watched the original/first one i think) i mean that is such a fucking nightmare scenario like ALSJDHSNEMSKDJSHSJSKWBALSODUEWBSLDKHDJSNSKSKSHSGEBWKAISGSHEKEKSKLDJDJDHDHSHAGGA (that’s the best way i can express my feelings about that scenario lmao)

oh and i’ve recently been watching more horror films but i don’t know if they’re for me... I like the thrill and whatever but i just end up being scared for my life when i have to go to the bathroom at night or when i’m trying to sleep bc suddenly my mind is flooded with all the scary shit from the films 💀💀💀

and music i mean... you know those people who just don’t listen to music? WHAT IS WRONG WITH THEM???? i honestly like all genres especially in the last year, i am IN LOVE with Nicki Minaj + Megan andddd Stormzy and i like Harry Styles but i prefer his first solo album (and obviously one direction has bangers i have a throwback 1D session at least once a month), I also love MGK especially his new stuff and otherwise i mostly listen to german artists lmao. So who do you like?💖 (WHY DO I FEEL LIKE YOURE GONNA SAY SOMETHING COMPLETELY DIFFERENT SKAHAGUS IF YOU LISTEN TO COMPLETELY DIFFERENT MUSIC DONT JUDGE ME AJSHDJS) (i know you’re not gonna judge me but)

++ @ the thing you said about writing, don’t worry, i don’t feel pressured at all!!! (not by you and not by anybody else.. except myself sometimes lol) and i’m just very happy that you liked my fics 🥰🥰🥰 and if i start telling people that i’m writing a fic then sometimes it puts a bit of (healthy) pressure on me. like yes sometimes it really is writer’s block, but sometimes i really am just lazy ddkshhd so now that i’ve told you i’m writing a fic i might get my ass up quicker than i would if i hadn’t told anyone 😌😌😌

#ok i wrote some if this on the tube/on the bus/at the dentist/in bed so if this seems like it’s all over the place #that’s bc i was literally all over the place skshg #*of #also i love how you used tags skajahsg #lovely anon #<3 #sorry if some of the sentences didn‘t make sense or were too fucking long i wrote half of this half asleep #and i know i dont have to apologise but still like no one should have to read all my page long sentences that arent even proper sentencesskk

[jojosbabe]

Random polnareff headcanons

Here is some random polnareff headcanons i have.

Note: this is my interpretation of the character. And honestly sometimes i don't like how others see my fave jobro(and anime husbando) . It kinda peeves me. But enjoy these hcs.

Warning may have some deep,heavy feels ahead. May talk about some tough subjects.

Polnareff wants a family but not right away. He definitely wants at least one child. But he's never pushy for it. He'd be a good father. (And anyone who disagrees he wouldn't needs to look at his character again deeper and not just at the surface. ). The fact he never got a chance to have a proper family growing up. And the fact his father probably left his mom and his mom died at a young age. He would never wanna leave his child if he has one. He'd ultimately leave it up to you. But he does want a family and a child. He is a good man damn it! Fuck what y'all think.

He does wanna get married and settle down and chill. Especially after the crap he went through in the events of SDC. (Again why wouldn't he? It makes sense.). He would be such a loving and caring husband. Good husbando material. (Don't understand why y'all so against this? Marriage can be spiritually defined as well. Marriage is what you and your partner want it to be in my opinion. Either way i believe polnareff of all the crusaders wants a wife/spouce and kids. The others are up to debate. But polnareff i see definitely wants that.)

Polnareff is the type of guy that is great with his own kids. Loves em and cherishes them to pieces. But other people's kids are a chore at times. He is good with kids however and will take care of the kid even if he is annoyed by it, dont be fooled pol pol is a good man and would do anything to help others especially the more "innocent" of society but he complains lol.. (The fact he raised sherry on his own should give you a clue!)but he looooves his own kids to death. And i think him being a father would be a great way to add more to his character and seeing healthy dad relationships is great. Considering most of the jojo characters do no have them. And we need more of jodads,its wholesome and i don't understand why people wouldn't like to see that?!

Polnareff is a loving man and doesn't like to see you upset. Especially if he's the one who causes it! Arguments with him are often short and never last long. It's petty to let these things hurt such a loving heart of gold(or silver. Tee hee). As polnareff would say "En' amour, on pardonne" (in love,we forgive). Even in the most heated of arguments. Most of the time he catches himself and walks away before he say anything hurtful,he knows his mouth can get him in trouble and say the wrong things out of anger. But in the cases he slips up. He feels awful about hurting anyone he loves. And he will instantly apologize and make amends. He doesn't like to see you hurt. One of his fears is you leaving him because of some stupid shit he may do. He always fears of others leaving him through death or just through his own personal downfalls. He makes sure to hold himself accountable. He is a man of his word and honor. (And you can pry that from my cold dead hands!)

He is very devoted and loyal. He would never cheat, EVER!!!! (and if anyone writes him as such that is very out of character and shame on you!) He loves his s/o and would never do that to hurt them. And he would love them and make shit work. Life can be hard but there is no challenge jean pierre polnareff can't do. People give up so easy in love. Polnareff does not. he will never abandon his heart. He would never give up on you!

Chivalry is never dead with this man. He will hold the doors open,pull your chair out,take care of you when your ill. And if someone insults you. Heaven help them cuz polnareff don't tolerate disrespectful behavior. Especially to women(and anyone with she/her/feminine pronouns). He'd politely of course ask them to stop,but if not. Silver chariot might have to make them stop. (Wise words of warning. Don't piss off polnareff and hurt his beloved). He is a man of his word and there isn't a promise he doesn't make that he doesn't intend to keep. If he says forever,he means it damn it!

Polnareff would probably nickname his kids cute names. For a baby girl,probably mon' angé (my angel) for a boy probably mon' petit prince (my little prince)...excuse me, cute fluffy shit gives me the feels... *clutches heart*

He'd definitely not name his kid after sherry. Due to the trauma. And also would want her memory to live on in other ways. He had to let her soul rest and move on. So i doubt he'd name his kids after his dead sister. But instead tell his children how wonderful she was and she lives on in their dads heart and whenever they feel down. Look up at the stars,she's there,smiling as bright as ever.

Polnareff is a sweetheart. Heavy romantic. But he is confident and bold. He is a soft dom. A gentleman. And would let you take the reigns of the chariot so to speak every now and than. *eyebrow wiggles* . But he ultimately guides you and is in control for the most part. (Dunno why they wanna Make polnareff to be so dainty all the time,sure he's a gentle lover but that dont mean he can't get rough or isn't dom. Have you seen him fight?! Have you seen this man! Good god people polnareff has some oomf to him. He may be a polite gentleman with his sexy french ass but he aint no pushover! He has a commanding presence that is calm but study,like a fucking knight! Hell yeah)

Speaking of knight. He has been called that several times. He loves it. And takes great pride in that title. Much to others annoyance. Lol.

Polnareff is a good boyfriend/husbando ok? And would be a great dad. And its like he walked straight out of a romance novel you find in the back of half price books/bookstores. You know the ones on the back of your mommas/grandma's/aunties toilet? Yeah that kind. Thats him. Imagine polnareff but on that cover. Yup. Your welcome for that visual. Lol. Every girls/guys/persons dreamboat and yet some of y'all sleep on my man. Smh

All in all i hope you enjoyed these.

And i apologize in advance if i get passionate bout this. But i just love this character. And i don't like it whenever people just get him so wrong or take him only at surface level.

Anyways have a great day/night whatever time it is your way. Jojosbabe out! 💖

#i self ship with jean pierre polnareff 💖⚔ #polnareff #jean pierre polnareff #polnareff x reader #polnareff hcs #jean pierre polnareff headcanons #hcs #my hcs #self ship #self shipping is the only shipping i do #self shipping #ahhhh! i just love him 🥰💋 #i just have a lot of feelings

[spacephant0m]

cw for personal talk about religion/spirituality and trying to find myself. Srry for typos

I’m in my room on the verge of tears and switching between crying and having a blank stare, watching brendon’s livestream on my ipad while i type this. I’m trying to study witchcraft to some extent as I’ve never really read much of anything about it before. Specifically I was reading about christian witches. Now the thing is like, i grew up as a christian. And nowadays i still believe in God definitely, but i hate christian practices. I remember reading and studying world religions in college last year and absolutely loving it and being so sad because i never experienced such practices in my own faith that actually seemed..... like, fun, and super connective. Me bawling my eyes out at church camp and being “lost” was not exactly what i originally thought it was. I was just mentally ill and didnt know it. Deep down i always knew i had a connection with God that wasnt faltering over silly shit a kid does wrong. Kid sins. Whatever the fuck. As much as i fucken prayed and asked for forgiveness, i was fine. Christianity is always a race to be closer to God and its like.... how close can i get when im doing the same fucking exact practices over and over.... they never really taught us about meditation and becoming one with your surroundings and idk, letting your spirit free. They kind of talked about it sometimes.

But i just hate the entire setup of church. I miss the family aspect so much. Thats all i miss. I miss bible study but really i just miss the points where we talked about life. Thats usually what we did, we would have an entire lesson setup and it would become totally derailed by our conversations. And it was real and i had a sense of community that i cant get anywhere else. I havent been able to find it anywhere else. But i also miss my personal sense of spirituality. I love that word and i love that it has so many encapsulating meanings. I dont wanna be like a white man self acclaimed guru who’s like read this book it’ll help you change your life....... i feel like those guys really appropriate culture and commercialize it. Its kinda gross. I try not to associate myself with that idea but every time i think about meditating more and shit im like “ew im gonna be a gross white guy whos all at peace w himself and lives in the mountains and shit” AND IT MAKES ME MAD. I’m having a beer right now instead of a cup of tea. Probably a mistake. Tea helps me feel better but im filling my body w shit at the moment bc thats what happens when i get this sad.

Anyways i really hate the idea of practicing a religion. I made a post before asking for sort of an advice on this, like was it okay for me to like witchy things and not actually be one. I was told yes its totally okay. And im not disrespectful of anyone and i dont make fun of any religion. I just persoaally cannot see myself involved with having an actual religion. I dont even consider myself christian so how could i ever proclaim myself as a christian witch, idk.

I dont want to label myself at all. Maybe i dont need any of this. Maybe i just need to play dnd and live vicariously thru my character. Use that shit as therapy. I hear it helps a lot with mental health and social skills. That of which i am verily lacking. I’m just hurting and im pissed off. I dont know why exactly. I just want to do meditation and i wanna buy my crystals and start doing yoga again. This year i have been stretching more. Actually i started on the first of feb. i stretch every day and do vocal exercises to help my voice get more control and deepen it a bit (transmasc).

I am also just a bit overwhelmed at everything. I dont know where to start. All i know is i want to burn incense like i used to growing up bc it always made me happy. And that i only believe in like..... cleansing through these elements and a prayer to God. But i’ve always had faith issues because im so insecure, i never think God will actually help me because maybe i dont deserve it or maybe he just doesnt want to.

I’m also scared im gonna do something wrong or fuck something up. That something bad will happen or something because im dumb. I dont know if i could mix my own herbs that feel right to me, or if i should use a recipe. I feel stupid that i dont have as much faith in prayer as i wish i did, but i have faith that little rocks will help to cleanse negative energy and things like that.

I dont know why im crying, i guess because im so insecure? Or maybe life is just rly hard and i’m overthinking everything. I just feel kinda bad. Yet when my friends tell me theyre praying for me, i do have faith in that and it means the world to me.

I know none of this is a big deal to anyone, and maybe none of it should matter. But im like. Idk. Im very interested in plants and medicines of the earth and shit like i always have been ever since i was young i thought of myself as like. Awakened and shit LOL whatever that means @ 10 year old me. I dont want to feel like anything controls me or owns me, i want to feel like i am in control of my own life and that i could harness the energy around me to not only like bring me peace of mind but to help me through my journey of life.

But i guess my biggest issue is i have no fuckin clue where to start. I hate reading and all this research im trying to do to help myself figure out what i enjoy is just. Making me so fucken overwhelmed. I only read like. 1 blog post and 2 articles and im already losing it. I always grew up w the mindset that God will take care of everything but like. He already has. In my mind. Because he’s already given us all the tools we need. But folks just like. Wanna be lazy and wait for things to happen. Sometimes all u can do is wait but when it comes to like, being THE ONES IN CONTROL, “prayers for america” is dumb as fck.

Idk i dont know anything and its okay to not know right now but i want something more in my life but i want it to be like.... totally personal and i dont want it to be absolutely everything my life revolves around. I want it to just be something i do and that i love. I dont need a label for it. But idk. I just dont know what to do.

If anyone has any sort of advice or is dealing with anything like this i’d love to hear about it. My ask and msgs are open as well. I feel pretty alone right now. Im just patiently waiting for my paycheck tomorrow so i can buy these crystals i rly want. But who knows what it will take to satisfy my hungry soul.

Another problem i rly have honestly is just like. Spending a lot of money on a lot of hobbies. I feel shitty for having so many things i enjoy doing. I try to narrow it down. I havent started embroidery bc i dont wanna spend more money and i feel like i’ll never have enough time to practice. Im just. Mediocre at a lot of things instead of rly super good at one thing. I mean i think im pretty great at drawing but thats about it. But ive been doing that for 10 years so ofc im good at it NOW. But ffs. I wanna do so many things and its overwhelming. I work a minimum wage job and its. I dont have enough money for anything lol so most of my stuff is low-budge† which is fine i guess but. Idk. Im tired. Im sad.

I dont know how to be more spiritual i dont know where to start. And my mind is telling me to slap a label on it or its not anything of value. Which is bullshit. But y’know. Anxiety n shit.

#witchcraft #witch #spirituality #religion #christian witch #meditation #blurb #finding myself #spiritual advice #religious advice #tryin not to cry again #removing labels #self help #i guess #personal #dandan speaks #idk what tags to use

[sweet-xoxo-thatcares]

I'm a desperate job whore. An exhibitionist.

Riding up and this stripper pole, you call busstop.

I don't need you to bend me over, push me down, show me how cynical I'm being.

Because on God, I could care less what you have to say. As long as you ain't sweeping my mother's broom underneath me.

I don't wanna be a Cinderella, but cheetah girls, I'm lost i can't find my way out this motherfucking castle.

And my bed is literally a porch party for ants.

And there ain't no food in that bitch.

I'm sick of running and hiding. Avoiding people who got something to say, something to share, something to hit to make me feel like shit.

While everybody else at the carnival, winning their prizes, getting their trophies; they're winning life's games. They already left.

But its me thats stuck now. And I never learned how to climb. I always received parables and hints and clues to tell me that the language skewed.

Cause nobody knows my mind, nobody knows my kind of kindness. The kind you serve to survive, not getting a beat down.

Not because you want to. I wanna say the right things, do the right things, make healthier decisions.

But its hard when you're so used to everybody else building the web for you like it is back at school, back at home. There's no one to teach me this shit, but me and I'm scared.

I dont have a license to prove to me that I'm doing it right, am I going the right way...

Should I leave what I used to know and still obey?

Should I still obey them? My mother, my father, my sisters, my cousins, my old best friend that died and left me hanging?

My world is skewed and I know not what to do based on what people trained me to be for themselves.

I was always a servant to somebody. Even to my own little sisters. Never could make up a mind for myself.

Cause I was taught to listen and to speak and control myself and others out of fear. Fear, is what kept me safe. Kept me sane in the material world of my mom and dad. But now it just makes me angry.

I'm more sad than I was before, because now the floor has no end, there is no ground.

I'm strapped onto this rollercoaster ride with my feet just dangling.

Dangling to The Lord to say help me. Lord where Is my help. I got my education but there's still no help.

Where is my family? Where is my walk with God?

Where is my house, my apartment?

Am I going past the wrong tree? Why do I keep coming home and having to start over at home base?

Something must be wrong with my mothers house, this place, this city....it doesn't even feel the same.

What once felt like joy, is driving me insane.

I miss my peaceful habitat. The habitat that made it feel safe to speak my mind and tell me who I am, so I didn't have to worry about who I am and where I'm going.

Going to school, going to college, I was so solid, a solid cube. Just passing through. Waiting until the next moment.

But now I feel like I'm this Joji Tie-Dye of colors.

Cause I don't wanna fuck up what kept me safe at home, but now I have to say goodbye to it.

Goodbye to Ms. Servant-Girl. Even when my aunts and uncles came over I was reminded that thats how my my family members see me. Cause momma and daddy had trained me for so long to be a true, caretaker for their kids that they disrespect. And everyone presents my flaws to my attention.

I can never escape, unless I leave.

But how can she leave unless she has no money.

And that is where she disassociates.

Adapted to being a child, staying in a child's place to be loved by her mother and father.

All they say is thanks for serving us.

And I feel empty, numb, and hungry.

But I don't tell anybody that.

Cause they snap on you for asking for more.

I'm no longer prisoner. But just sitting in the fucking lobby waiting on my ride somewhere, anywhere but here to get me out is driving me diabolically crazy. Because they still have the nerve to still chain me up for favors, when all I want is my freedom.

I dont wanna be a slave, masochist, servant child anymore. Cause sometimes I even ask for help, but it comes with a cost. I hate borrowing cause it leads me back to those thoughts of being 10 and 9 years old. Still locked in that princess pink room, with the canopy bed. I should be grateful.

But there was always something missing even as I got older.

It felt like she didn't love me or like me, she just did it because she had to. Cause I was just a child and she was my mother. She turned our place of home and fun into a business and everybody's secret mission was to do as unto her, bow down to her, like my father.

And I never talked about it. She looked down on me for not wanting to clean, not wanting to watch the kids, change their diapers, walk them to school, clean up her snotty tissues on the couch, and never cry or tell I'm upset.

I was supposed to go to my room, and never say anything about it or she would just get mad at me more. Cause momma and daddy never wanted me to say "you're hurting me"

And that's how I started talking as different people as myself. Because I never knew how to talk out my feelings that wouldn't lead me to getting in trouble with a boss, friend or coworker....

Not even in a relationship.

Cause I could never talk to my mom about how she would make me feel because honestly in her eyes its "you're just too sensitive" "you took it the wrong way" "you're criticizing me about how I talk to you?"

Dad does it too, but more in the sense "if I say I'm sorry that you can't take a joke, go ahead laugh or challenge me?"

Then if he's right, he's right. If he's wrong, it depends on how big the claim was.

But yes, both are controlling, offensive yet defensive depending on what we say.

[pokefanbri]

Im still fucking fighting, i keep telling myself im not gonna let go & Fuck everyone else who thinks I should. But sometimes there's the opposite, im just lost & idk what to do....hes not gonna come back...so why should I bother to keep fighting 😔 If someone asks me...

Are they worth it? Absolutely. Because theres always room for improvement & growth, & we've been doing that apart for ourselves now for 7months. Did they give u the respect and attention u deserved? Are we not more valuable than that? Hell no & hell yes lol. Look I was happy just doing that for him but yea when it came to me honestly it was like nah im good 😒 & i know how fucked up it is that id go along with his selfishness but I did. I did deserve better & he knows I did... i just didnt wanna lose him & did anything he needed me for... but I ended up losing him anyway 😔 theres a reason why u work on that kinda shit & grow together as you go so everyone is happy, its fair to say we both lost sight...I was eager to learn everything about him cuz I wanted to be closer...but I was blocked out & pushed away, he wouldn't open up & talk to me or show feelings for anything, even of me when he used to all the time...like he was scared of being too attached or didnt want to get hurt..he didnt trust me or was afraid to show his true self or show any emotion that'd be viewed as weak due to the typical be a man complex. Idk I was confused & didnt know what was needed to help fix things so yea i walked on eggshells & me showing affection of my own free will was out of the question most of the time...I couldn't touch him unless he wanted me to & rare occurrences for my own satisfaction. Its the reason why I cried all the damn time, I felt avoided & unwanted because my own attention lacked pretty badly. How tf do I love a fucknugget bobblehead like that lmao, cuz I dont give 2 flying fucks he was my man ok! & being close enough to him made me happy enough I guess, I still looked at him like he was my world even if I wanted to slap him for making me feel so lonely at the same time. I admit his needs came b4 mine, he liked it more that way & I took care of him more than I did myself. But if he had more effort to take care of my needs in turn & I were happier than I was, & us happy at the same time, then maybe I wouldn't be so hard on myself...cry all the time & smoke like a chimney 🙁

I still don't fully understand why he held back, communicating with me on a deeper level is supposed to be natural & pretty much all normal couples show an appropriate amount of affection & understanding to eachother....but it was kept burried...was he afraid id hate him, judge him, make fun? No, id love him even more! Idc how dark he may think he is or whatever past bs he's gone through or even if he was lying about anything...its okay it can't hurt u anymore dear & we can overcome it just tell me what it is thats lacking & let's fix this. Id say "sit down babe, tell me everything, whats on your mind, what can I do to help 😊" & id give him the most gentle kiss on the forehead. I'd do anything to see a smile from that face & it makes me smile too. I want to help him, he needs somebody to hold just as much as I do cuz the fact of the matter is babe, he's just as broken as I am, we both need someone to put back our pieces & become whole again...after we try doing it solo it can only go so far b4 u want that physical presence of another again to help u more so. He keeps everything bottled up & especially didnt let me see what was happening to him I had no clue, if he didnt like talking to anyone he at least had me but still kept me away from him, whatever it was festered in him & he changed his whole demeanor toward me, he became colder & shut me out for good 😔 Making me feel even more unwanted. We didnt help eachother through our problems & I really wanted to, I wanted to save us for the longest time way b4 the end. Idk maybe if he put in as much effort & we knew how to function better together instead of a Corolla with just 2 wheels then we'd probably be fine...& our suspension wouldn't be dragging on the asphalt 😂 Its not all on him for fault, I take equal amount of responsibility, we failed eachother, we didn't know wtf we were doing & 9/10 it was just friends with benefits with only 1 of us in love & attached, & the other not really caring with side pieces to chat with 🤷‍♀️

U know what 🤬 They're right, he's right, & now I'm actually starting to accept it the more I write. Maybe just maybe,HE DOESN'T DESERVE ME AT ALL. Im still upset and frustrated. To answer the question again from earlier no maybe he's not worth it. I suffered through his bs and 10fold heartbreak afterward!! If he can't own up, right his wrongs & bring us both peace then no he's not worth suffering for afterall, and ive been loving the wrong soul this whole damn time 😣 He kicked me to the curb cuz he a fucking coward! He cant admit his wrongdoings, ask for forgiveness, say im sorry or actually put the tiniest bit of effort into a relationship to make it work, but instead disposes of me so he wouldn't have to confront any of it & just continue on like nothing happened are fucking kidding me!!?? I thought u were smarter than this, its beneath you to just run away & pretend I never mattered to you when we both know I did!!!....& im crying again. Im still feeling the betrayal apparently, ill never be able to trust him fully again anyway, let alone other men now. I dont hate you, I love you very much. But I hate the evil from you that you've shown me. I should've known honestly, I was naive to see all types of disrespect but this was the worst part. I still love him but i do deserve better than that & I hope he's changed his ways. Trust a guy with a high track record of ladies & a handful of em in their hand..what u think 🤔 can trust be gained back? Can I get over the bad uncalled for lying shit he's said about me to other women to make himself look better? Idk 🤷‍♀️ I haven't been able to rest without closure for so long, but enough is enough im making my own. You're absolutely right, you'd just manipulate me further, I thought maybe we could be better than before...round 2 at some point in the future...but maybe we're not salvageable after all. Thats up to u, I did everything I could, but now if u were to ever come back idk if I'd jump into your arms or slam the door in your face, I just dont know. Its better that I try never speaking of u again, or think of you for as long as I can so that I can heal better....cuz loving you even after the fact is tearing me apart & making me lose focus on what matters more, myself. I fought valiantly as long as I could, 7 months is a long time to not shut up about u lol.. maybe you've been hearing me I wouldn't know. I have to force it or ill never be able to, ill still silently grieve but as much as it hurts, Its time. U were my rock, an asshole but a good one, the best gamer I got to know, a boss at alot of things, with the cutest lil butt, & somehow the love of my life. Other than maybe something valentines or anniv related in Feb ofcourse....Ur getting what u wanted, I have to do whats best for me now, I have to let u go. I held on for so long but Im really tired & emotionally drained, im just torturing myself when i need to stop, im defeated, nobody won anything, everyone got hurt in 2020 why should our relationship be any different, id say we gave it our all be we both know we didnt. This hurts me so much to do, like my heart is breaking again. Bye babe, I love you with all my heart. 💋💞 💟

I tried to do what I could but if he left, I just gotta try to move on. If I take him back, I gotta consider how that's gonna look like & if I really got past the damage he did....obviously theres some I still haven't 😔 Its what im telling myself while trying to move past this. Others going through the same...We're in love and they ain't. We can't control their actions but we can control our actions. Im not a toxic person..only to myself, I love with all my heart, nobody bothers to understand...they just judge

[chickenfetus]

ALL MY EGG (and for the four names: jae, killer kang, minhyuk (whichever one), and santa

deadass i did the 100 questions ask meme for this ask and almost posted it rip

🐰 what is one secret that you’ve never told anyone?

theres literally nothing i dont even know what to say ???? 

💗 if you could hug anyone, who would it be?

not 2 be delusional but i would give up my world to hug changkyun

🐹 what are some of your favourite Pokémon and why?

glaceon is UP THERE idk why honestly but the sinnoh games were my first and i just??? i was really into ice and snow and shit u know so glaceon... thakn u

another pkmn ill always have is lucario ????? its just so cool?????

🌠 if you were in charge of the world, what would the world look like?

hopefully forgiveness and like???? acknowledging mistakes and learning from those u know jst positive stuff and like?? water. god i love water

👀 what was the most recent vivid dream that you had?

hm okay i think this one was from last night or the night b4??? and like???? idk???? i dont even know how 2 start tbh?

so im like hanging over at this two kid’s im a kid 2 i think place and idk we just talk and shit??? idk whomst the boys were tho

and then we get to a scene where its like??? at a train station???? and i go to the washroom to shit or smth idk thankfully i didnt shit myself irl

then i have to get onto the train which isnt even a train its like a carousel with seats??? and its like on a train track boys this is 2 much and i forgot to get ready my train card thing so the guy (who i was p sure was evil) waited for me to remove it so i got onto the transportation device lmao

and then once im seated i remember i forgot my jacket so i make like hand movements 2 the creep and hes runnig 2 me with my jakcet but the ride’s way too fast so i yell and say ill come back for it even tho im p sure i wasnt going 2

after that i wke up wild

☀️ what do you like the most about your best friend?

i dont have a best friend and all of my friends have their own unique qualities if i went into a rant abt them rn this will b so long

😘 talk about your crush or partner

[minhyuk voice] theres none

💁 if someone was rude to you, would you be rude back?

ya bc im petty but it really depends on the person

🌟 what do you like about yourself? (must choose at least 3 things!)

my personality (the good parts)

my values

my taste in friends (my Big Friends are either geminis or scorpios good)

🐾 what are you scared of most? how will you overcome it?

the dark and bitch isnt gonna turn off her night light any time soon

🎁 what never fails to make you happy?

seeing my favourite happy, listening to the music i like 

💙 what annoys you about some people?

i jjust went into a full out rant abt this on the other reply so ill be quiet now

😤 do you get angry easily?

yeahhhhh 

🐇 what do you always daydream about?

my faves tbh

🌻 if you could change 3 things about the world what would you change?

bad people , gone.

everybody only sends love and happy things on anon

i just want everyone 2 b nice & friendly wars of any sort dont exist and no one wants anybody dead

🍓 send me 4 names: kiss, befriend, kill or marry?

if u sent jae’s name earlier id have trouble so im glad

kiss: tihis is so fucking embarrassing wtf minhyku (mx) but only on the cheek basically everywhere except the lips or anyplace weird

befriend: brian :-0

kill: jae goodbye loser

marry: sanha we can yell every time we gotta turn the lights off

✈️ what is your dream city and why?

tokyo bc its NICE

☕️ talk about your ideal day

cant read

🌸 are you an introvert, ambivert or extrovert?

i suddenly thought of the word ambivore which made me think of the word vore i wanna delete im a both? mayb idk

💧 when was the last time you cried?

nov 3 bc my heart hurts whenever i see ppl being a bad friend

🎵 name 5 songs you love at the moment

oh worm

all alone - day6

with you - astro

dramarama - mx (even though it isnt out yet lmao)

run - bts (the superior bts song)

hellevator - / (i was rly gonna make this mixed languages but rip)

⚡️ if you had any superpower, what would it be and why?

to fly bc im basic

💛 if you could talk to your younger self, what would you say?

dont do that

💚 who are you jealous of and why?

nobody in general????????? 

💎 which one would you rather have more of: intelligence, beauty, kindness, wealth or bravery? why?

intelligence i have 2 live somehow what if my money gets stolen

🙊 what are you ashamed of?

my humor

🌺 which languages do you know? which do you want to learn?

i (barely) know chinese despite having 2 take it all my life legends only

i know english but im bad at that 2 and its my first language once again legends only

i wanna learn japanese and korean 

🍀 if you could be any fictional character’s best friend/lover, which fictional character would you be?

the cow from voltron 

☁️ talk about your dream universe.

weve already discussed this

💜 which acts of kindness are you going to do today?

oh w-0rm ok so im a regular anon on this persons blog and i wanted to send an ask but never got arnd doing it so im gonna send her one. soon/

🐬 if you could transform into any animal/magical creature, what would you be and why?

let me live my life as a furry and cat

🍄 talk about someone/something you really dislike

are u ready 4 me to b the meanest person yet bc i sure am lets fucking go

so theres this girl. and i know her (unfortunately) and ive known her since like 4 years ago and back then she was already pretty shit tbh

she cried bc she had to sit in between the “weird” and “dirty” girls in our class and she headass cried in front of them and everyone just bc she didnt like the arrangement?? shes called the “dirty” girl disgusting before and has made fun of her in front of everybody its just bad :-/

now. fast forward 3 years and in addition to still being disrespectful and rude, she now vocalizes her weird fantasies for her “oppas”??? some examples: 

“when i go watch __ perform im gonna climb onto stage and then my mother and my future husband will fight for me” and she calls those kpop idols weird shit and basically sexualizes them/???? she says the weirdest fucking shit on her ig story and tags them??????? 

another thing. she went to korea nd took a picture of a complete stranger and posted it on her public ig and called him her “oppa” and said that they had a “fun day together” despite the guy not knowing her at all???? she posted the pic of him??? i still dont get it tbh 

she wasnt even being ironic at all??? she calls herself & classmates “autistic” whenever she/others do smth dumb or mess up and its just sososososo fucking wrong

being one of the people to see how shes basically grown from bad to worse is something i dont fucking enjoy and i jsut want to leave my class already lmao 

ok but there are times where i do appreciate her because sometimes the class will be rly quiet and the teacher is basically talking 2 themselves but she’ll always respond w/o fail so thats great but its only bc she talks so damn much 

i just got a flashback to when she “jokingly” said she wanted to be a trainee for the rest of her life how do i just. god

😣 talk about some things that have been making you depressed/angry/anxious lately

we’ve once again already discussed this

🍪 what did you want to be as a kid, and what do you want to be now?

i wanted to be various things honestly?? ranging from an astronaut to a vet to an editor to an animator to other stuff i get influenced pretty easily so if i watch smth and i think its cool ill want 2 be that i guess?? ive been trying 2 get rid of that habit so now i have no clue what i wanna be

🍰 what are some of your favourite sugary foods?

sweets and chocolate cake

🍑 what are you obsessed with?

drinking water and staying hydrated

making my friends laugh is great 2

💘 what happens to you when you’re stressed?

acne LMAO 

😪 what are you sick of?

the usual

🙀 are you an adrenaline seeker?

i love scouting on sif and bandori so yeah 

💥 what are some unpopular opinions that you have?

lets not 

☔️ would you consider yourself a good person?

to a certain extent

😊 what do you like to do as hobbies?

use my phone???? send nice anons and comment on art/fics 

🎤 what’s the last song you hummed or sang by yourself?

none

🐝 what’s your worst trait? how are you planning to improve it?

my tolerance for ppl’s shit is so low

🎨 what do you always doodle when you’re bored?

my ocs

🐻 what’s stopping you from chasing your dreams?

i dont have a dream hence myself

🌷 what’s your mbti personality and why do you think it suits you?

infpt i dont rmb shit but yeah

🐶 send me 3 fictional people and I’ll choose my favourite!

falen i dont rmb what u sent

👑 who are your favourite celebrities and why?

i dont follow any :-o zendaya has had my heart ever since shake it off tho

🐴 opinion on day6?

ur rly gonna do this 2m e?

all alone just started playng this is terrible lets get it

so day6. a band i only found out about in late june (thank u boxy) and before this i only ever listened to bts and mx bc my friends stan them so i thought i was gonna expect boys dancing, the usual. 

i clicked i smile and i lost my fucking shit as soon as i saw the instruments because prior to day6 i was a big 5sos fan so this was rly resonating to me tbh and i was just !!! so fukcng excited??? i never intended to even get into day6 honestly??? but after witnessing how good they are and watching about all of the available mvs at that point i was completely in awe so i caved a created a stan twitter for them.

now, this isnt even the most of it. after becoming a fan i realized how much more these 5 boys are. they compose (if im not wrong) and brian writes lyrics for the songs each month because of their everyday6 project and again, im wow-ed because??? the amount of dedication???? they went from releasing 2 title tracks in 2 years to releasing 12 title tracks and 12 bside tracks in a single year. they havent released the december song yet but haviing to work on 2 or more songs in 4 weeks is fucking amazing if you ask me. 

theyre really talented and theyre just so versatile (am i using that word correctly) and each month their songs sound different. this project has given them the opportunity to try new things and you can hear the steady improvement in each of their vocals (dowoonie not so much since he barely gets lines, but we all know hes working hard) and if you listen to their debut song - kongchu and compare it to the version they released along with sunrise it just???? the drumming has even changed from the original version nd its so noticeable that whenever i hear kongchu from 2015 i know its the old ver

to add to those, they do vlives every week and although those vlives are always scheduled it still makes my day seeing them and watching them do the usual. 

one thing im upset about is that how they barely promote themselves, they rarely get on variety shows (the most is individual schedules) and we, as mydays never really get to know the boys so its harder to fall for them as a whole. i dont know if its jyp or day6′s decision but if this is how they want to be known for - their music only, then so be it. we still have jae’s presence on youtube, music access and asc. thats the most we can get and it makes it difficult for us to learn about the rest but thats okay.

another thing. their concerts are something i always look forward to (even though my interest has died down a bit;) their concerts are just so fun to listen to?? there’ll always be mydays who stream the concert so everyone else can listen to them play and they sound so good live it drives me crazy. mydays are always so hyped and whenever mydays sing along it just gives me goosebumps??? bc theyre so???? good????? 

tldr; day6 deserve more, following wise and promotions wise because they work so hard and once this project ends i hope they’ll manage to rest but still remain as a presence that will be known instead of returning to jyp’s dungeon.

🍋 do you consider yourself an emotional person?

there are days where i am more emotional than usual 

📚 share 3 books that you love and your favourite quote from them.

this is tiring

😔 what do you always do when you feel sad? does it help?

i sleep and boy it really helps

😌 what thoughts keep you going when you’re sad?

rest

🌍 which country do you live in?

singapore

🐧 describe yourself in 3 words

lame funny swag

🐵 which quotes changed you?

“rocky swag” - park minhyuk, 2017

💭 do you keep a diary?

nope

💫 who inspires you?

brian kang 

👻 do you believe in ghosts and why?

yes bc i love losing sleep

🎀 what’s your fashion sense like?

terrible

🎬 what are some of your favourite films?

i watched spiderman homecoming and i have no idea why i didnt see the plot twist coming but its GOOD watch it

🍦 what is one treasured childhood memory?

theres none lads

🐼 if you could meet anyone, who would it be and why?

all my internet buddies but sometimes i dont want to bc im kinda....gross

#softshouyous #asks #if anybody actually read all through all of this.... thank u. #FALEN THAKNK U FOR ASKING I LOVE U

[bongtoast]

VICTUURI TEAChER/SINGLE PARENT AU?

OKOKOK SO ITS TAKEN ME AGES TO FIND EVERYTHING I’D DISCUSSED WITH SOMEONE REGARDING THIS AU BUT I FOUND THEM SO IM ANSWERING THIS NOW!! IK ITS SUPER LATE AND IM SORRY BUT AAAAok so the first thing is that we’re gonna completely disregard the typical “yurio’s in like 4th grade and ADORES yuuri as his teacher” because yall can just miss me w that, and instead have a high school english teacher yuuri who puts up with NONE of yurio’s shit. he doesn’t wanna participate? too bad. tries to argue? not having it. eventually yuuri doesn’t even need to say anything. to any of his students. they just receive The Look and that’s the end of it.

now because yurio is yurio, victor - who’s his older brother and legal guardian - gets his ears talked off about “my stupid fucking english teacher”, which causes victor to get this massive image of yuuri beings this mean old bastard who hates children and yurio especially (maybe yurio’s trans?? yall decide) and he becomes both pissed and terrified of this teacher.

dont get me wrong tho, yuuri is a mad Professional (except around his senior class. they’ve seen a different side of mr katsuki…) but victor’s still TERRIFIED of meeting him.

eventually, though, he has to. parent teacher interviews are next thursday, so unfortunately, victor’s going to have to face the music and meet this teacher. and he is shitting himself. thursday rolls around, and victor’s got a million thoughts running through his head - what will i hear? am i gonna like it?? DD: - and yurio isn’t helping boost his confidence much (in australia the student also attends the interview so im going off of that) because he knows deep down that yuuri isn’t that bad.

and if he knows victor, he knows what’s gonna happen next.

so they’re standing out the front of the classroom. the door is locked. they can’t hear anything from the inside. they look at each other.

and victor slowly reaches up to knock.

they enter.

and victor….

…

…

iMMEDIATELY falls in love because yuuri katsuki is SO FUCKING ADORABLE. victor was honest to god expecting a crockety old 60 y/o man and he gets Booty-licious Japanese Man who is the DEFINITION of nice and polite. he is an ANGEL. THIS MAN LITERALLY OFFERS THEM A CUP OF TEA BEFORE THEY START.

so victor and yurio sit down, tea placed in front of them, but victor still doesn’t know what to expect. he’s been completely thrown off guard by yuuri (who’s wearing pants that cling to his ass and thighs in THE MOST PERFECT WAY POSSIBLE and his button up is so ugly and. honestly victor cannot believe this man is real) but yurio’s shitting himself in the corner because he has no idea what’s about to be said, and yuuri has no fuckin clue what to do but he’s just like “umm… okay… let’s get started”

and as i said before, yuuri isn’t an easy teacher. he’s nice and courteous, but you don’t disrespect him and the effort he puts into his career. you just don’t! he doesn’t take shit from Anyone. he’ll offer you a hot beverage when you come into the parent teacher interview and he always ensures that the students are fed before they start a class, but if you try to argue with him (WITHOUT REASON) he will DESTROY YOU.

once they’re all settled in, yuuri pretty much breaks the ice with “so i first wanted to talk about yuri’s behaviour” and LET ME TELL YOU.

ALL. HELL. BREAKS. LOOSE.

victor’s like “oh god”. yurio’s like “oh GOD”. yuuri just continues talking. and yknow, he goes on to say how yurio has some issues with participating and stubbornness - and, at times, respect - but then he’s like “but when he does participate? mr nikiforov, yuri has a brilliant mind on him.

“his answers are honestly some of the smartest i hear. he has a keen mind for the work we’re doing and his understanding of concepts is phenomenal. sure, he tends to swear a lot in his answers - which” and he turns to yurio at this “he really needs to stop - but the guts of his answers are simply fantastic.”

and victor’s not really processing this because although he came in not knowing what to expect, he knew he wasn’t expecting that. so he turns to yurio and probably whacks him upside the head or smth in a typical older brother fashion and says “yurio!! you told me he was mean!! wtf!!!”

and yeah. that interview is the beginning of a beautiful relationship.

(ALTERNATIVELY: victor goes into the interview ready to tear a bitch apart and gets his ass handed to him. he starts telling yuuri off about the way he supposedly singles yurio out and constantly gives him detentions, forces him to participate, and essentially bullies yurio into answering questions

and he kinda goes on for a while like that but eventually he asks yuuri what he has to say for himself and… yurio actually full on slides himself down in his seat because the look on yuuri’s fuckin face?? it says it all.

he then proceeds to COMPLETELY DRAG VICTOR.

it’s brilliant.)

////IM SORRY EVERYONE THAT THIS WAS SO LONG AAAAAA I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS DUMB AU DESPITE IT////

#long post #yuri on ice #au #victuuri #IM SO SORRY LMFAO