#i forgot how much of a PAIN it can be when you spend 15+ mins getting a good angle after careful planning of where the character will move | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

anxietysroomsupport · 3 years

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Hypermobile anon here. First, thank you so much. It's just nice to know there's someone here for me. And to give a little more info, I have a serious problem where if I'm not currently in pain. I don't remember how bad it was. I know everybody does this, but my brain literally checked out as I was going to bed recently and I fell on the floor. I nearly forgot to tell my physical therapist.about it because it didn't really hurt. So, I can't do the pain scale very well, and I never remember (1/2)

(2/2) It just makes it sort of hard for pain relief when I don't know I'm going to need it and don't have the energy when I do. Also, on the vitamin subject, I know that I've had vitamin d issues before (bad heat exhaustion and allergy scares = going outside less), bad enough that I was close to being diagnosed with hypothyroidism. I'm not sure about the others, but I do know I'm not amazing healthy, so? I take calcium pills for the vitamin d, though. Again, thank you guys for all your help.

We just got a bill from my PT place that says we owe money that we can't pay. They told us up front how much it would be with our insurance, and my mom's been paying each time, but it says we owe 177 dollars. Sure, it's not a lot, but we're not rich and trying to send a sibling to college. If we can't get this sorted out. I can't just not go. 10 exercises I can do at home and 5 appointments is not enough to help a chronic disorder. I cant focus and I have practice in 30 mins. -Hypermobility anon

Same day but later when I'm feeling a little better (my director was very supportive though so that's nice), I'd seen the letter and heard my parents talking a bit, but my mom told be as we got to school for rehearsal about PT. I got upset, and I felt bad because I could tell she felt bad because she didn't expect me to be upset, and in the heat of the moment I said "chronic illness" in front of my mom for the first time. She loudly (not quite yelling) (1/?) - Hypermobility anon

said to me "That is the most self-pitying thing I've ever heard. Chronic illnesses are like cancer". Sure, I probably should've said disorder and not illness, but I'm scientifically right. Then I said "It is, it's chronic pain, I am always in pain" and she said "Well then clearly PT isn't helping anyway" - I??? When I went in after 15 minutes after another girl, since we were both there for an hour and a half, I decided to stop trying too much to hide my crying (useful masks) (2/?) -HSD anon

since the other girl was in the hall to eat, and when I managed to explain to the director, she was understanding and nice, and when I said chronic, she said that I should never have to live with that, especially at my age. And when I mentioned not being able to sing at that moment from my crying, she pointed out how I was singing an empowering song that was about standing against the bad stuff in life, and I was perfect for it. I know my mom was just mad, but it just drained me.

Sorry I keep sending asks so often, I just feel like telling someone this. I decided to put 'zebra' in my bio. It's a thing that people with EDS and HSD sometimes like to call themselves. I like it, so even though I just have my name and pronouns, plus a random joke, in my bio, I added it. It just feels like a step in the right direction to remembering that I don't need google to tell me I'm dealing with this every 5 minutes. Accepting it, I guess. :) -HSD anon

My sleep schedule just keeps getting worse and I think it's my ADHD combined busy days and pain but I just never want to sleep anymore. I can't, I don't want to, and it hurts physically and mentally to just lie there and see if I can fall asleep. 80% sure my circadian rhythm changed to sleep at about 2 am but I get up at 7 and have a chronic disorder that's getting worse because of this I *need sleep*. And I'm so scared I'll mess up, want to make a side blog for it but want to make one (1/2)

for something happy first because I always figured that if I had side blogs they would be ask blogs or for fandoms or whatever. But I got a little better at not caring what other people think, so I haven't really needed one for fandom. But I looked through the tag and felt so comforted by some of the stuff that I just think it would help me. Maybe I'm just extra bad tonight because I went outside but also talked about it a fair amount with a friend I hadn't seen recently who didn't know. -HSD

I wanna talk to my physical therapist about hip braces because I tried a knee one we have and it honestly helps, but my hips are worst so I wanna see if it would help, but they're pretty expensive. It's hard to find dual hip braces, from what I've seen in my research, and even though one more than the other, both cause me issues. Idk, I'm conflicted, because it could help but is it worth all the effort? Also, even if it's under clothing it's still physical evidence (1/2) -HSD anon

(2/2) of my "invisible" disorder. Also, stopping exercises for a few days because of not feeling well from my covid shot reminded me of just how much time I spend on them, so it's another thing to deal with this. . . Idk, sometimes I just wonder if it would be better to just deal with it. I still have pain anyway, though it might be a little better. Less often, maybe? I don't really remember. It's not stressing at the front of my mind all the time, but the back of it. I'm just conflicted. -HSD

HSD anon here, idk if I mentioned it in an ask already, but recently I had a small breakdown because I was watching something where a character was in a car accident, as was trying to push through having trouble walking even with a hip brace. After a minute, I registered it and just thought "That could be my future". My joints had already been acting up and then they got worse, so I don't know if it was cause and effect? But I don't exactly know what to call it other than a trigger. (1/2)

Physical and emotional effect, at least I'm assuming on physical because I've had a bad reaction to something similar before, but like, I don't have trauma, I think it's more fear of the future. And I don't want to use trigger incorrectly, it's insensitive to those who actually have triggers. I'm just so confused.

Forgot to sign the last ask with 2/2 and HSD, whoops.

Hfnsiwk I'm not ready to walk into PT tomorrow and say that I don't think months of PT have been helping but I have no way to be completely sure because for all I know it's the weather since this is the first year I've known/it's been noticeable. Maybe it's just change, I don't know, but it just feels like such a waste of time if it really didn't help. Plus, I'd stop, and while that'd be great, I do enjoy being stronger, even if it didn't help pain. I have 12 hours and a bad pain day idek. -HSD

Hi Hypermobility Anon,

I think I found all your asks and got them in the correct order. And found your last ask!

I’m so glad you kept writing in. I think you should go ahead and make your side blog - you definitely have enough material for it. Wanting to make a happy side blog also is a great goal to have, but if you don’t know what it will be yet, don’t let that prevent you from doing something you know you want to do and that will probably help you.

You are dealing with So. Much. Your mom especially sounds like she just is not ready to accept the situation. It’s not self-pity to state your actual conditions. It’s just reality.

Forgetting about pain is normal, and really all you can do is try to write it down or make some kind of note about it in the moment or immediately after, so you can refer to it later. Maybe you can track your pain events in your phone notes.

I think your idea to add “zebra” to your bio is a good one, this is part of your life and just something you have to deal with. It sounds like you’re finding a community for this.

Sleep schedules are tricky, and feeling like you desperately need to sleep can make it so stressful that it starts a vicious little cycle. Some strategies to get around this are First, remember that just resting is okay and helpful too, even if you don’t fall asleep. Letting your body lay there to rest is good for you.

Second, if you’ve spent several minutes laying down without falling asleep, its okay to get up and walk around, or any small light exercise that’s comfortable for you. The goal with this one is to get out of the bed for a bit. It will help your brain to re-learn that the bed is for sleeping only, not for laying awake. That association can help signal to your brain to start its sleep-process when you get into bed at night.

Third, it’s really common to have a changing circadian rhythm during your teens and twenties. That’s just a thing that happens and you can’t do much about it, so just try not to worry too much. Sleep when it feels right and when you can, instead of trying to force yourself to sleep when you’re “supposed” to.

If hip braces would help you, you should definitely at least mention it to your physical therapist. You might research online for any used ones as well. A physical sign that you have pain can have good and bad consequences, but I think the good consequence of being in less pain far outweighs any others.

The triggering event you described is not so much a trigger as it is just a genuinely really upsetting situation. You related really strongly to the character you were watching, because they’re dealing with similar problems to you, and to problems you could have in the future. It’s a lot to process. But while you could potentially be in a car accident, remember that television is made to dramatize events and probably made it seem a lot more difficult and scary than it really would be.

Since we know you sometimes forget your pain, it’s safe to say that the exercises are helping you manage it, and you say that they’ve made you stronger in general. Those are good things, and I would recommend you continue the exercises you can do on your own even if you end of ending your physical therapy sessions. We don’t know yet if your pain might have gotten even worse without therapy. You’ll have to find that out on your own if you stop exercising, and then decide whether it’s more worth it to you to continue exercising or to live with the pain. Whichever you choose, it’s Your choice, Your body. Take care of yourself. <3

-bun

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a-day-in-the-life-of-a-brotha · 3 years

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4-27-21 The end of a 12 day shift

4:22 a.m. I woke up at 4 a.m. but I stayed laid down thinking about all the things I needed to do. Pack a bag (I’m going to spend the night with Dani...well nights) cut my hair, and, manicure myself. I also have to prepare myself for work. “Shit, what am I packing” I exclaimed to the still air. Sometimes it’s weird when nobody is there ie; my children my mother. Dani sent a text “Good Morning my Love”...Ditto.

5:21 a.m. I leave the house...too late to go to McDonald’s to get 2 round egg and cheese biscuits and a large sweet tea with a little bit of ice. But my addiction to cigarettes does lead me to 7-11 to get a pack, even though I’m running late for work.

Frustration #1 So the cashier that’s normally there, ain’t there, thank goodness, however it’s a new guy...not new but not the normal early shift guy. He’s slow, I’m late, and there are many amigos in line. “Newport 100 box brother”....quick exchange and we are done. So in this instance it’s truly not an outside frustration...it’s me that’s frustrated that I am compelled to go to this job, just to make money, so I can maintain food, shelter and clothing for my loved ones. I’m a slave, all of these things should be free. I’m getting under compensated and overpaying for living....yes...just for living.

5:50 a.m. Work. It’s Tuesday...my Friday. I’m exhausted already, pained to be at this workhouse/plantation, anticipating the days end (I’m going to meet Dani). As I walk up and get settled in my work station, the jones (talking shit) begins..”You on the phone?” says my short bus patron co-worker...I head nod to confirm his thought. He still finds a way to come over to me to draw my energy which sooo many people seem to do as of late. “You be proper as shit when you’re on the phone...then gangsta as shit when you get off”...says the man that just two weeks ago hurled words that would provoke me to smack him with the bricks I call my hands on the street...but we was at work, so it’s a bunch of bullshit he’s spewing. I laughed, “It’s true brother, I am proper on the phone with my lady!” What he doesn’t know is that when I’m relaxed, I’m proper, shit I’ve studied this language so much, I’ve mastered it...so I use it. You can only go as far as your thoughts take you...so if you have a limited vocabulary that’s how far you’re going. I know I know, it’s the white mans language, but I’m from here, and it’s the only language I’m well versed in. Espanol...un pocito!!

7:00 a.m. The arrival of Omar. My friend. We are almost 30 years in as friends. “What’s up big guy” he says...”What’s up O” says me. We are both strong headed men, and about the only two people at this job that are not afraid to lose it. That characteristic trait sets us apart from the sheep at this place that are scared to speak up for themselves, instead for some of them, we will speak up. Do me and O bump heads...hell yeah. But we’ve come to a point where we can gauge each other...and we now know when and how to stay away from each other, with no hard feelings. One time we were arguing at work, a dude came to try to calm us down, we simultaneously shut that nigga down...and retired outside to squash it. Work ensues...

12:00 p.m. After Lunch. I was called in the office. Ok I fudged some numbers on the diesel gas pump for the buses I service...a couple of buses mileage was off. Who cares right? The supervisor does...Dave. He’s an older white guy that is accustomed to talking to black men any way he wants. Not me though...our first run in was our last. “LARRY to the office” on the loud speaker he says. I go... and he starts to raise his voice as if I were a child.

Frustration #2 Although this instance didn’t happen on this day, I’m getting frustrated by merely thinking about it. When Dave gets to yelling (mind you this is the 2nd of two caucasian supervisors I’ve ever had, I’m 45) all I hear is the “Blah Blah Blah...aggression aggression aggression”...I meet aggression with aggression...I don’t fight fire fire with fire...I fight fire with water. “Dave, when you raise your voice at me, I can’t hear you, AND all I get is angry.” He quickly stopped, apologized and let me calmly know what the ailment was. Nonetheless on this day, I got called in the office, informed about the challenge and I said I would fix it. He went on this soliloquy as to how and why it needs to fixed. I’m smarter than him, but I get paid less...I already knew how to solve the problem. It gives me hives, listening to idiots...

2:30 p.m. The Anticipation of Dani. I’m off work...my anxiety is on 100...I’m not having a good day, but I’m going straight to Dani...I miss her, but I’m anxious about sex...we haven’t done that yet. I rush to her, she gets off at 2:45, but she’s 45 mins away in Baltimore, and I don’t want her to be waiting too long. “What’s up babe...how was your day” says she, whilst on the speakerphone in my car. I’m completely honest with her “I’m not having a good day.” Now I don’t want to not have a good day, shit I’m about to see her, my love, my buxom enchantress, but I must be real and honest...it’s the basis of our relationship. I get there.

3:30 p.m. Dani and the food reviewer “Big Schlim.” I arrive, a hug and kiss ensued, we are both exhausted but glad to be in each other’s presence. “How was your day Dani?” “It was ok” she said and then goes in on the length of her time at work and how she was amped to get out of there (anytime you feels this way about employment, it’s definitely slave work). Normally I already have a spot that I want to go review, today I didn’t. Soooo off to MyMammasVegan to get them delicious ass honey ol bay fried cauliflower bites. In the intern I’ll figure out what we will be eating. As we rode, my guard was let down, I don’t have to defend myself with her, she is a part of my solace. We got the bites, we went to the spot, we people watched and joned on folks...laughter and her...got me through. Let’s go home...

I forgot to mention Friends...how many of us have them. Malika...well..here’s the text I sent... Good Day Malika. I truly hope that you are in a harmonious space to receive and wholeheartedly digest this message. I’ll start by saying that I love you, and I am honored to truly call you and think of you as a real friend.

I’m sending this message to set up some boundaries for me, with you. I will no longer accept you yelling at me out of frustration. I will no longer accept you hanging up the phone abruptly out of frustration. As a long time friend I expect support for my endeavors. A like, a share, a comment on the new ventures I have, are simple but effective gestures to show support and cost nothing. I noticed, a while back, that the things I was posting on my IG pages were getting no support from you. That was truly disappointing. Even the IKEA post that you called me about wasn’t liked by you, and if you truly read it, you would’ve known what that “Pink Shit” was. That call you made to me also showed a complete disregard for my schedule. I’ve relayed to you several times that I work the early morning hours...and you seem to “forget” or you just simply don’t care. Also...for the last 4 years I’ve noticed a pattern amongst my “friends”....none of you know my children. Initially I was riddled with guilt behind this, thinking that was on ME to bring them around more often. But wait a minute...you know where I live, I’ve had the same number for years, at ANY time you could’ve called and came by to chill with them...do ANYTHING with them (pre Covid). They’ve received nothing from you...nothing....your occasional presence is free. They are almost 15 and if they see you on the street...they won’t know you...and that’s not on me. I sat back and waited to see what was going to happen...nothing. So Malika, I must set up some healthy boundaries with you, these behaviors for you hurt me, and I will no longer allow that to happen, especially to my children who don’t know you for real. Ian remaining your lifelong friend...period....I ask you to respect me in the aforementioned manner going forward, and this text is not meant for you to rebuttal, it’s for you to know, and for me to release. Thank you for being around for 30.

6:30’ish Home. Dani’s House. We finally arrived. This is where I end. Me and her at home are private...I just know that I’m meant to be with her...my wife.

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xjamlessparkx · 5 years

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divorce | myg | 03

summary: in which you have to go through a painful process of your own family shattering

pairing: yoongi x reader

genre: angst

01 | 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 | 10 | 11 |12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17

Seeing all the food you prepared for dinner wasn't making you hungry at all. You called the kids from upstairs and sat down, pouring water into your glass.

"I am so hungry!!" Junsun exclaimed as he sat down and started eating. You smiled and stared at the two while they ate their food.

You thought about Yoongi's new affair. This young girl who had a disrespectful and cruel mouth. You sighed, looking at the wall in front of you where multiple pictures hanged on. You tried to figure out what she was implying on when she said that she already planned all of this.

"Mommy?" Ahran interrupted your thoughts. You turned to her and smiled, waiting for her to start talking.

"Why didn't daddy come to eat today?" She asked. Your smile faded and you put your glass on the table, trying to think of a good answer. "We two haven't seen daddy in a week now ..." her voice sounded hurt and she looked down. You turned to Junsun who was nodding.

"I miss Daddy ..." Junsun mumbled, biting his lip.

You took a deep breath and watched your children being sad about the fact that their father didn't spend time with them in a week. After the incident from today, you didn't want to talk to him but you put your pride away for your kids.

"No... he wanted to be with you. He is probably totally late due to much work ..." you lied and saw their faces getting cheerless until you finally gave in. "I will call him, okay?" You hesitantly pulled out your phone and dialed his number, waiting for his answer. He didn't pick up and you could tell why. Nonetheless, you acted as if someone was on the phone.

"Hello?" You started, seeing your children eyes lighten up. They watched with enthusiasm. "You're still working? Um, Junsun and Ahran are waiting for you ... tomorrow? Alright." You pout fakely and ended the fake call.

"And?" Junsun asked you.

"He said, um, he will pick you up from school and bring you to the amusement park tomorrow and after that, he will watch a movie with you." You lied, literally hating yourself for doing so. They jumped over joy and hugged you.

"Daddy will be home, finally!" Junsun sang which made you chuckle but feel guilty, immediately.

"Alright, guys! Time to brush your teeth and go to bed! You have to get up early, right?" You clapped in your hands while you stood up. You caressed their hair as they ran upstairs. Now you had to tell Yoongi to pick them up tomorrow. You decided to text him because in that way he will see it for sure. Hopefully, he won't cancel it due to his full schedule. At least he could cancel it for his children.

You cleaned the kitchen and went upstairs to check on your kids. First, you went into Junsun's room. His blanket was halfway on the floor and you smiled to yourself. Like father like son. You pulled the blanket over his shoulders and kissed his forehead before leaving his room to check on Ahran who was also asleep. You still went up to her and kissed her before going into your room. You changed into your pajama and lied down on the huge bed. Before you drifted off you checked your phone if there was any reply by Yoongi which wasn't the case even though it said 'read'. Putting your phone on your nightstand you turned to the other side of your bed. Your hands were under your cheek, trying to warm up. You hoped for his ignorance to be a sign that he had time and would pick them up.

You moved so much and tried to fall asleep. Something was bothering you today. The fact that you knew the real feelings of Yoongi towards you and your marriage or the fact that you shared a conversation with his new girl. It didn't matter that she planned all of this. Right now, all you could tell her was 'congratulations' because Yoongi was already head over heels for her.

If she tries a slight move on your kids you would forget about humanity.

Aghh why do I even worry about her words!? She is young and immature. What can she do other than taking all of the materialistic things from you?

You tried stopping all of your thoughts which were bothering you right now. Closing your eyes tightly you drifted off to sleep. _ "Mom, dad will pick us up today right?" Ahran asked for clarification. You nodded, looking at the road where the bus would come any minute soon. You always waited with your children until their bus came to make sure their way to school is safe. When the bus arrived you kissed them.

"Behave, alright!" you said as they nodded and jumped into the bus. You waved them their goodbyes and wanted to go home when you heard a familiar voice stopping you.

"Mis Y/F/N" you turned around, being greeted by your landlord. He smiled at you.

"Oh, Ahjussi ... how are you?" You smiled and he nodded slightly.

"I am fine thank you ... " you knew that he wanted to tell you something. "We already know us for so long and I know that you didn't pay the bill for the electricity and water on purpose. You probably forgot ... I just wanted to remind you since I saw you here" he said, your smile dropping down.

"Oh yes ... you're right. I, I forgot" you lied and looked around, being a little embarrassed about this situation. "I.. uh, we will pay the rent as soon as possible" you bowed down before leaving him to hop into your house. Yoongi must have stopped paying for the needs of the house. You also weren't able to use your own credit cards since he stopped the bank transferring money on it. You sighed and went to the kitchen to look up if there is something you need to buy since you wanted to go grocery shopping. Once you opened the fridge you were greeted by an empty one. There were some vegetables and fruits in the fridge but that's all. You closed the fridge, grabbing your purse in which you had a bit of money in it. Enough for going grocery shopping.

You knew that you couldn't sit home anymore. It was time to stand up for yourself and your children. You had to find a job to make a living. Even though Yoongi has to pay spousal support for their children after your divorce you promised yourself to never touch their money.

While going shopping you decided to look for a good job. You knew it was hard since you didn't work for more than 10 years now. They would prefer younger employees but still, you didn't wanna throw away a chance. Also, you decided to tell Yoongi to pay the bills this month, the last time. At least for his children.

Putting on your jacket you left your house and went into the city to go grocery shopping. With all of the grocery bags, you looked up the showcases if there is someone looking for a new employee. Sadly you couldn't find even one. That's why you decided to go home and look for a job on the internet. Nowadays everything is possible because of new technology. Also, it was already late and your children must be about to return with Yoongi.

You put the bags on the counter of your kitchen and grabbed your phone to look at the time. It was already 6 pm and you wondered why they still haven't returned. Just as you wanted to call Yoongi you changed your mind. Maybe they're doing something fun and enjoyable right now, it would be a pity if you would destroy their moment. Just as you wanted to place the groceries your phone rang. You picked up the unknown caller ID.

"Hello?" You mumbled.

"Is this Mis Y/F/N?" The female voice asked from the other line.

"Yes ... how can I help you?"

"Unbelievable! How can you let your kids stay in school for so long? Did you forget to pick them up!? They're already waiting for their parents to pick them up, for more than 4 hours-" you furrowed your eyebrows and tried to catch everything the angry woman spatted out.

"Wait, wait! I don't understand what you say. Didn't their father pick them up?" You asked in disbelief.

"Are you deaf Ma'am? No one came ... that's why they're sitting here" She said rudely.

Your eyes widened "I, I will come as fast as I can" you ended the phone call, feeling the atmosphere getting tense. Why the hell didn't Yoongi pick them up!? Furiously, you grabbed your phone and dialed his number. He didn't pick up and you called him again. Over and over again until he picked up.

"WHAT!?" He yelled from the other line.

"WHY DIDN'T YOU PICK OUR CHILDREN UP?!" you yelled back, feeling him getting astonished.

"What are you talking about? You never told me to pick them up!" he remarked, making you feel more irritated and mad.

"You're gonna pick me up right now and we will drive to our children's school to get them home!" You said, not pausing once.

"What are you talking about??" He asked, sounding confused.

"Our kids are in that goddamnit school and now you will drive me there to pick them up. RIGHT NOW" you wanted to save your energy for hissing at him until you saw him face to face. You ended the phone call and grabbed your jacket which you put on and waited outside for him to arrive. You accepted that he was rude to you, that he ignored you but you will never accept him ignoring his children. Not like that. His car parked in front of you hopped in, closing the door furiously.

"Hey! Calm down!" He said and looked at you "What are my children doing in school at this hour?" He asked.

"I guess I should ask you Mr. Min because you didn't pick them up!" You sighed, going through your hair.

"What do you mean? Why should I pick them up?" He asked, getting frustrated and confused about the whole situation right now.

"Because I texted you to pick them up. Yesterday! Because they missed their father and wanted to spend time with him when their father clearly doesn't care anymore-" he cut you off, furrowing his eyebrows.

"I didn't receive any text message from you!" He exclaimed, pulling out his phone to show you his recent messages which were empty.

"No way" you pulled out your phone and showed him the texts you sent him. His eyes widened as he saw the date.

"That's not possible... I mean-" you cut him off, knowing who could've possibly deleted the messages. "Just go already!" He pressed the gas pedal angrily.

The whole ride was silent until you arrived at your destination. You jumped out of the car and ran into the school, followed by Yoongi running behind you. Once you opened the principal's room you were met by your disappointed children.

"Mom!" Junsun's face light up when you kneeled down to hug the two.

"I am so sorry!" You said looking at the principal who sat on their desk. The woman stood up.

Yoongi kneeled down as well and pulled them into a deep hug. "I am so sorry! Appa will make it better" he said, sounding desperate and hurt.

You stood up and looked at the principal.

"Next time I can't make sure to find them and let them wait in school safely. You should look for your children..." she said, guiding you outside. She wasn't pleased with the idea of waiting for someone's parents to arrive and you noticed how annoyed she was right now. You thanked her before she left and were left alone with Yoongi. You turned to him and saw him making up to the two since they were sad about the fact that the couldn't spend time with their father.

"Tomorrow is our day!" He promised them and you saw them smiling which made your distress fade away even for a little bit. Once he made eye contact with you his smile faded and he helped the children into the car.

"Listen ... I didn't see the text" he said and you nodded.

"I believe you, Yoongi" you said honestly. "I guess I know who deleted them, though-" he cut you off not wanting to argue.

"Can you stop talking about here right now? The topic is about me and my kids ..." he mumbled. He knew that his new affair was possibly the reason for him not receiving a text but he was too ashamed to admit it.

"Yeah ... I mean it was a demon who deleted them, trying to avoid you spending time with your children" you whispered, knowing that he heard all of that. He rolled his eyes and went to his car. How can he be so stubborn? You hopped into the car and drove home with Yoongi. On your way home you saw Junsun and Ahran falling asleep from the inside mirror.

Yoongi parked in front of your house and turned around. A huge smile made its way to his lips as he saw his children sleeping. You watched him admiring his children. It was wrong to think that he doesn't care for his children. In the end, he is still their father who loves them as much as you love them, right? Just because he wants to divorce doesn't mean that he doesn't love his children anymore. Just because his love for you faded doesn't mean it faded for his children as well. You were silly enough to judge his responsibility and passion for his children just because you hated him for divorcing you.

"Will you take Junsun? I will take my princess ..." he smiled as he hopped out of the car to lift Ahran in bridal style. You took Junsun on your back in piggyback style because he wasn't heavy at all. You unlocked your door and switched on the lights so you two could see where you were going. The only sound which was heard was your footsteps and the stairs cracking quietly. You brought Junsun into his room and changed his clothes so he could sleep comfortably. Kissing his cheek gently, you left the room and went into Ahrans to be met by a confused Yoongi trying to change her clothes. You let out a quiet chuckle while opening the drawer to pull out her pajamas. You kneeled down next to Yoongi.

"Did you already forgot where her clothes are?" you grinned slightly. He bit his lip and watched you changing Ahrans clothes. She opened her eyes while you lied her down on her bed. "Mom?" she mumbled half asleep. "Where is dad?" she slowly drifted off. Yoongi squeezed her hand tightly and kissed her forehead.

"I'm always here, princess!" Yoongi had always a soft spot for Ahran in his heart. It was his first child, the first time he got called "Dad". When you found out about your pregnancy, Yoongi always came home with pink baby clothes. Even though you still didn't find out its gender. He was always saying that he had a flair for telling a non-born gender. Little did you know that he desperately wanted to have a daughter and his wish became reality.

As soon as Ahran fell asleep you went downstairs. He had to leave again...

"Would, would you like to have a drink before you leave? Tea? Coffee?" you asked him. He shook his head and looked around the room, biting his lip.

"I will take the kids out tomorrow, so don't worry..." he said and you missed those calm conversations with him. You nodded, not being able to talk right now because at any moment soon your tears would start falling again.

"I, I should get going ..." his breath was coming in gasps.

"Yeah ... you're right ..." you stared into his eyes, wanting to hold him back. Telling him to not leave and to stay with you. The silence filled the room and you wanted to ask him. Anything. Since when he forgot, since when he replaced you and why he stood silent. You wanted to tell him about the precious days where you called each other "mine". What happened to us. To our love. When and why did it stop blooming like your first day? As long as you could listen to his voice you would find anything satisfying.

You watched him leaving slowly as if he waited for you to say something. Why was he so oblivious to this whole situation. Your gaze went to the floor when he opened the door. He didn't look back and left the house. The loud sound of the door closing snapped you out from your trance.

You went to the front door and put your hand on the cold wooden door. Slowly, sliding down on your knees as you started crying in pain.

Why was it so hard to let go of him?

#min yoongi angst #bts scenarios #bts angst #bts series #bangtan angst #bangtan series #bangtan scenarios #bts fanfiction #bts fanfic #min yoongi series #yoongi series #yoongi angst #yoongi scenarios #min yoongi scenarios

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writingsofmyimagination · 5 years

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Conjecture |4|

Yoongi x Reader

Idol Reader Au, Enemies to Lovers AU

Summary: Your management refused to renew your contract unless you collaborated, so you ending up working with Min Yoongi. A guy you’d disliked from before both of your debuts. There is more to their past than meets the eye.

Words:2713

Links to other parts in my masterlist

if you want to be tagged let me know :)

@msunnsstuff @rosey-roseu @eyelessmin

Warnings: Swearing Suggested smut. (Smut in next chapter YAY :)

(Mention’s on Monsta X’s Wonho)

Reblog, Like, Comment :)

//Yoongi had to consciously stop his mouth falling open when you came onto the set. He had to retain the same control over his gaze stopping them from constantly soaking up the view. When he was directed to grip at your hip, his heart forgot to function for a few beats. He wasn’t surprised by your irritated reaction given how you’d been acting and made himself empathise with you even though his less than innocent thoughts were permeating through.//

You jolted awake

“Fuck” was all you heard muffled through your door accompanied by the sound of glass shattering. You rushed out of bed to the source of the noise. A section of the floor was blurred with a pool of orange juice with glass shards floating as debris. What was more alarming was the droplets of red falling and causing a red orange ripple throughout the pool. Yoongi was hissing through pursed lips and gripping his left hand with his right nursing it with a tea towel.

“What happened? Sit down” you ordered. He looked at you through his fringe which overshadowed his eyes.

“I just turned with the glass in my hand which wasn’t high enough and just smashed into the worktop. I’m fine, sorry I woke you”

“You’re obviously not, sit the fuck down and let me have a look” Your tone drew his eyes wide and he submitted, taking big steps to avoid any more glass took a drooped himself on the sofa.

“Please tell me you have something that resembles a first aid box or something” you pleaded.

“Under the bathroom sink”. You washed your hands and brought the box as well as some tweezers and sat on the coffee table facing him.

“Give me your hand” he did as he was told and gave you his hand.

“I don’t know how I feel about you bossing me around” Yoongi quipped a pained smile directed your way. This is nothing you thought.

“No? Why’s that?” You slowly pulled away the towel, there were several small cuts and a couple of large but thankfully not too deep gashes. You removed all his bracelets quickly erasing any blood which had invaded them.

“Because I normally hate being told what to do” he exhaled forcefully as you picked a couple of glass fragments from his hand.

“And what? With me you like it? Brace yourself” You wiped his palm over with a disinfectant wipe.

“Shit!” his other hand retracted into a fist, his knuckles washing over with white. “That stings, and yeah something like that” he chuckled with a light heartedness you’d not seen before, a light heartedness that was acting as a decoy to disguise the confession of something less innocent and playful than the reality of what he meant. You found the confession amusing yet curious but you hid any reaction, you cheeks on the other hand let you down and tinted a shallow shade of red. A quick smirk peeked out on his lips noticing this before his pained expression returned.

“What was you rushing around for anyway?” you asked completely steering away from any more teasing remarks.

“I was trying to make you breakfast before you woke up” You paused wrapping the bandage around his hand and stared at it for a moment, why was this guy so god damn sweet!

“And why was you doing that?”

“I could see you were pissed yesterday, and just thought it might make you feel better” you resumed your final wrap around with the bandage and pinned it.

“And I know you don’t particularly like me for some reason and I’d like to try and change that” he added as sincere as you’ve ever heard him but it was also laced with sadness that loaded you with slight guilt. You heart sank down feebly to the bottom of your stomach, you felt kind of bad that he’d picked up on it but then you acknowledged how much of a bitch you’d actually been to him at times. You wasn’t by any means going to enter into a discussion about the details but you told yourself from now on you’ll try and be more amenable. The guy you started working with a few days ago had been nothing but professional, kind and thoughtful.

“There, all done” you stood and gathered the rubbish and ignored his previous comment and went to go and make a start on the kitchen.

“I’m more than capable of cleaning up my own mess and thank you for this” he stood after you and waved his injured limb.

“Consider it my apology for being difficult and my thanks for making me breakfast. It has made me feel a bit better” You smile and words were resolute; he went to protest further

“Don’t make me boss you around” you teased. He raised his hands up in surrender and waited while cleaned the chaos and finished serving up the omelettes he’d prepared. They were amazing. He wasn’t sure on the toppings you’d want so he’d gathered a few bowls of a few different options.

“What’s the plan for today?” you enquired

“Well we’ve more or less smashed out the lyrics so let’s get those finished and polished off and then we can get started on the music, I’ve took some ideas from your singing the other day and made some demo’s we can trial. I reckon we can be in the studio by the end of the week and make a start on recording” he ended brightly

“Sounds good, I’d like to have some solo studio time if that’s okay while I just work out the sections I’ll be rapping and singing. If you trust me in your set up that is”

“I’m sure I can cope. What time you want the guys to come pick you up later?”

“Probably about 20:45 if that’s okay? My hairdresser will be here around half seven. You should really come it will be good exposure for the single if we go together” You omitted the part that you’d actually just like to spend some more casual time with him, you wasn’t keen on accepting it yourself let alone speaking it aloud.

“I’m sure that will be fine, and nope, nothing will change my mind I’m staying in my cave”

“Fine suit yourself” you carried the dishes cleared them and loaded up the dishwasher, the mechanical hum merged into the background.

“Will Wonho be there?” he asked hoping he wasn’t coming across too curious.

“Yeah, but my manager bit my ear off yesterday about the whole dispatch thing. I’m not to go near him all evening” you sulked. There was a slight brightening of Yoongi’s demeanour, he felt slightly guilty for being pleased by this revelation.

“But they’ll be no press inside surely?”

“There’s always a couple who will have been given exclusive access, so means best behaviour for me”

“Is that even a thing with you?” he bounced back at you quickly.

“Very funny, I’m going to grab a quick shower and I’ll meet you in the studio”

A better attitude even if it was a slightly forced one at times made the days session fly by, you’d both completely finished and agreed with the lyrics and were soaring through the music. You ended up being so engrained into your work you were shocked when the bell rang at half seven.

“Oh shit, please can you let her in and tell her I’ll be like 15 minutes, I need to get dressed properly” you were staring into a face clearly amused by your panic and stared right back at you void of motion to wind you up.

“Yoongi!”

“Fine, fine, I’ll go”

You rushed to your room, launched your clothes to scatter behind you and unzipped the dress bag hung over the wardrobe door. The Alexander McQueen dress staring back at you made you happy you’d changed your mind last minute. It was a black mini dress with a deep V-neck line, the v-line was filled with tonal floral lace inserts. The same style of lace also covered the arms leaving scalloped edges at your hands. The neck line was too deep to have a normal bra so you’d have to rely on the lift tape to keep you in place and secure for the night. The dress was on the thinner side but the material was thick on quality, it sat nicely on your figure and gave you a smooth silhouette. You secured the thigh choker your assistant had dropped off tightly around your thigh. It was a simple black leather strap with rounded studs on it and connected to a metal heart. You slung your behind on your unmade bed and slipped on your long black ankle boots, also Alexander McQueen. The foot section was adorned with hammered silver studs, the leather that crept up your calf has a strip of nappa leather buttons going down the outside. The silver needle heel was sturdier than you thought it would be as you cat walked yourself up and down in front of the full length body mirror. Grateful you checked, your bruises needed a quick touch up of concealer.

Now just the hair and makeup left

Yoongi nearly floored you coming out of his room in an unnecessary rush.

“Sorry…” the other words got lost as his eyes scanned you intently

“Seeing as you’re there would you mind?” you turned and scooped your hair up exposing most of your upper back. He gripped the zip which sat at the small of your back and made every effort to pull it outwards slightly as too avoid contact as he pulled the zip up.

“Thanks, sure you still don’t want to come with a date looking like this?” you twirled in a joyous motion, enjoying the awkwardness of watching his eyes not know where to settle.

“With you looking as magnificent as that I’d be near enough invisible, I’ll leave Wonho to deal with all the admirers”

Why did he even bring him up? Was he implying he wouldn’t be able to deal with other people looking at me in a certain way?

“Your loss, and he’ll just have to look and not touch with all the others tonight” you affirmed seemingly pleased you’ll be teasing him.

“I don’t envy him this evening” The penny dropped Sadie was still waiting patiently in the living room and you hastily made your way to the woman capable of performing miracles.

“Sadie I’m so sorry, I was too absorbed in this new record” You grabbed a bar stool and placed it in front on the mirror on the wall next to the window. Her stack of boxes piled up on the coffee table.

“Don’t sweat it girl, now sit down and let’s finish this look off”

The boys arrived early to get introductions out of the way and to have a few pre drinks, Yoongi had resigned himself to being a solemn bartender. They repeated trying to convince him to make an appearance but he was as stubborn as he was talented.

“Cars here guys” RM announced. J-Hope bounced up, his face already a little flushed from alcohol.

The party was an exclusive event, anyone who was anyone in the industry gets invited, it’s more of a showcase with new or up and coming artists performing throughout the evening and general atmosphere to network. The car stopped outside the venue and the chauffer opened the door and the guys climbed out to a blinding screen of flashes and excited demanding noises. RM offered his hand and assisted you out of the car. Only a couple of media networks were allowed inside to take official photos and interviews; this only made the frenzy of media into the venue more ravenous. You stood and posed for the camera’s when directed, when you were freed you spent the remainder of the carpet time by the fans, taking selfies, signing autographs and generally giving them as much of your time as you could before you were ushered inside.

The buzz of the room when you entered was electric, crowds of people fluttering around reconnecting and mingling. Everyone had a drink in their hand and looked stunning, J-Hope and RM managed to find you amongst the chaos and showed you to your reserved booth for the evening at the side of the room. At the end of the room was a small elevated stage with equipment stacked neatly at the side, including some brilliant speakers. The room was decorated with mostly a royal red with silver vines twisting around features of the room; it was similar to the décor you’d expect at a theatre.

“You can order your drinks on this, we don’t even have to get up and go to the bar” J-Hope beamed as he slid you a small phone like device and you immediately went to the gin section and ordered a few pink gin cocktails. You’d sweetly smile when your eyes caught someone you were familiar with; your eyes fritted around for people you actually wanted to speak to. You and Wonho finally spotted each other pulling your lips into a grin, moments later your phone buzzed.

- You expect me to stay away from you all night looking like that?-[20:59]

You knew instantly it was going to be a long frustrating night

- well we’re just both going to have to do as we’re told, doesn’t mean we can’t have fun, you know I like to tease – [21:02]

You watched his expression diffuse into manic anticipation as he read your reply. When your drinks arrived you drifted from the boys and mingled with your friends, who imposed more than a few shots on you. Your manager managed to come out from backstage preparing a newbie to your label for his performance and casually checked in on your progress, you’d always loved his relaxed approach and how he just mostly left you to work, he didn’t even have to learn the hard way.

You slumped yourself back into the booth out of breath from owing the dancefloor, downing the last of one of your drinks including the ice cubes.

-That dress belongs on my bedroom floor, with me bound and gagged under you and my chest all marked up because I misbehaved-[22:39]

RM was looking at you amused with your intoxication or your wry smile as you read your message.

You almost choked on your drink, seemingly forgetting how to swallow as your body was too preoccupied controlling its arousal levels. He knew how to get you. You made a conscious effort to divert from being drawn in to Wonho’s gaze which you knew would be more than you could tolerate without dragging him somewhere private.

“What?” you questioned with a challenge.

“Nothing, nothing” he lied unapologetically. J-Hope returned reuniting the three of you at the table.

“Performances start in fifteen minutes” he announced. You were sat perfectly content until your eyes fell on the reason you’re mainstream career struggled to take off and the reason you’d vowed to never work with a male artists again. When his gaze melded with yours the bastard winked. Your eyes widened and mouth dropped slightly open with disgust. Anger swelled in your chest, raising your heart rate, adrenaline flooding your system preparing your for battle. You jumped up and made a b-line straight for him with everyone else in the room becoming a blur into the background.

“Hey, watch it!” you complained as you’d crashed into a figure. He grabbed your wrist and refused to move out of your line of fire.

“Let’s go get some air before you ruin your career” a voice spoke sternly yet quiet enough to keep the demand just between the two of you. You looked up

“Yoongi… What the fuck, I’m not…”

“You’re telling me you’re not on your way over there to attack that asshole?”

“He deserves it” you spat

“I’m not disputing that, outside now and cool down” he applied more pressure to your wrist, the way he was glaring at you, you knew he wasn’t backing down on his. Your rage hit a wall and sat simmering on hold. You rolled your eyes as he essentially escorted you out of the building.

#bts #bangtanarmynet #kpopwritersworldnet #kpopwonderlandtag #min yoongi #yoongi x reaer #BTS suga #suga x reader #suga imagines #bts fanfction #enemies to lovers

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x-useobwa-x · 5 years

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༄ Fix me | Part 15 - don't let me fall asleep in silence

College! Yoongi x Reader sm/au

➺ Word count: 3,5k

< Previous | Next >

Genre: Crack humor, heavy angst, romance, fluff, !TRIGGER WARNING!

College finally starts for you and your best friends and you are excited, very excited. You were going to make your college years the most memorable of your life, but then you met your roommate, and your life started to take turns you’d never had imagined…

Start reading!

⇣ ⇣ ⇣ ⇣ ⇣ ⇣

• Yoongis point of view •

Scanning the living room with his eyes, he’s satisfied with himself.He’s cleaned up the whole mess he caused overnight. The fact that you had to see him like this still lingers deep within him. You looked scared, shocked, to say the least, and he feels so incredibly sorry for that. He’s happy that you left at his wish, he really is, yet he secretly wished you would have stayed, have shown him that there is someone out there that cares for him despite what he has done, that there is someone, that he is not alone. With a sigh he abandons these thoughts again, pushing himself off of the kitchen counter he’s been leaning against, hissing at some stinging pain shooting through his hand.

Right, his hand was wounded. He almost forgot about that while being distracted by cleaning up, but now he’s reminded all the more as he gazes over his knuckles. Scoffing, he lets his arm fall back to his side, going to the bathroom. Opening a drawer, he’s looking for band-aids, happy to find them rather quickly. Lazily he patches his wound up and closes the drawer again, roughly. His eyes fall on his own reflection, looking at himself through the mirror. He looks tired, exhausted. His eyes are decorated with heavy eyelids and dark circles, his hair in complete disarray, the aftermath of the previous night still evident in his visual. However, the worst is, that he feels so incredibly lonely right now. He wants someone to be close to, after years of shutting everyone out, years of being alone, he can barely take it anymore, no, he can’t take it anymore. Sadness begins filling up his heart, a giant wave of loneliness washing over him as he craves closeness. Right now, he wishes for nothing more than for you to come back to your room, he wouldn’t even want to talk to you, he just wants to know that someone is near. Especially you.

The second he opened the door for you a day ago as you arrived, he can’t stop thinking about it. The smell of your perfume that was the same as hers, your hair that reminded him of hers, the smile that you gave him when you first saw him radiating the same warmth he hasn’t felt in years. He can’t help but smile at the fact of how pathetic he feels over what he’s about to do now, but he’s heading for your door, opening and closing it behind him as he enters your room. He’s walking around, looking at how you organized your room, paying attention to every oh-so-small detail. His observing comes to an end as he stands in front of your bed. You left without getting it done. Without thinking, the next thing that happens is Yoongi finding himself lying down, curling up into your blanket. He closes his eyes and the smell of the same perfume mixed with a hint of alcohol due to your night out starts filling his senses as he’s taking it in. Thoughtless, he’s losing himself in the comfort of your smell; a slight feeling of contentment spreading inside of him. He’s letting his guard down, allowing the exhaustion to wash over him, not a single care in the world right now. Your blanket in his tight embrace, he’s drifting away, falling asleep while your smell gives him the feeling of not being alone, as if he could feel your presence through it.

• Your point of view •

You’re on your way home as your phone beeps. Taking it out of your pocket, your eyes widen an unreal amount, brows lifting just as much while you stare at the screen. Min Yoongi? Following you? That you’re completely confused by now would be the understatement of the century. First, he tries to piss you off as much as possible, then he suddenly apologizes, then he has a complete mental breakdown while you’re sound asleep, asking you softly to please leave him when you find him, and now he follows you. You’re really trying to understanding what’s going on in that head of his but you just can’t figure it out. Deciding that you want to ask him about it and maybe have him open up to you a little, your pace increases. As you reach the building, you rush upstairs and come to stop in front of your door, taking a deep breath. Fishing your keys out of your pocket, you already brace yourself for the worst again. The more you are surprised that, when you push the door open, you find the apartment all cleaned up. The shards are gone, no shades of red to be found on the wooden floor. Softly, a smile is tugging at your lips, pleased that you didn’t have to tell him, or worse, do it yourself.

You get rid of your jacket and take off your shoes, and then decide to head over to Yoongis room to thank him. Knocking two times, slowly and carefully you open his door the tiniest bit to peek inside, only to figure out the reason to why no one is answering you- his room is empty. Somehow, that leaves you with a slight feeling of panic, considering the condition he was in when you last saw him. Silently praying that nothing is up and you’re just overreacting, you leave his room again and head for your own one.

Opening the door, your jaw drops. On your bed you find him, sleeping peacefully as if he had never felt any worry in his life. You move over to your bed, carefully taking a seat next to his sleeping silhouette. Glancing over his frame, you notice that he’s changed clothes, too. Suddenly reminded of his wounds, you allow yourself to softly pull one of his arms, loosening up the tight embrace in which your blanket happens to be. He shifts slightly, and you pause to avoid waking him up. As soon as he’s settled again you continue and bring his arm over to you, checking if he took care of his hand. As you gaze over his hand, you can’t help but let out a breathy laughter- his hand is a mess. He did patch it up, yes, but the way he did it has you shaking your head with a wide smile. He used band-aids that barely fit, not even covering his wounds, which results in them sticking out every here and there. He didn’t even bother to clean up the dried blood that is surrounding them. 'At least he tried' you tell yourself while placing his hand back to where it was before. You’re sitting there, wondering about if you should let him sleep and go spend the night on the sofa or if you’re going to wake him up and tell him to leave since you’re pretty beat after the chaotic day you’ve had. Sneaking a glance at how serene he’s looking, you immediately accept your defeat. There’s no way you could bring it over your heart to wake him after what he must have been through last night, finally finding some peace- although you’re not sure why he seems to find said peace in your room, or rather, your bed. Taking advantage of the fact that he can’t catch you while he’s sleeping, you rest your eyes on him for a little longer, finally able to take a closer look at him. You find small moles on his nose and cheek, notice his eyelashes, and for the first time see, that the young man that’s laying in front of you, is very skinny. As if you’d have developed some sort of motherly instincts, you’re wondering if he’s eating well. Exhaling deep, you’re getting up to get your well-deserved sleep on the sofa. You’re almost at the door as your actions get interrupted by his voice. “Y/n...“ he calls out quietly, almost inaudible. You turn around to face him, wondering if he’s been awake all the time. “Yoongi... I thought you were sleeping.“ “I was...“ “Oh, did I wake you? I’m sorry. I just wanted to go to the sofa to get some sleep myself.“ you explain. For a bit, there’s no response or reaction from his side, leaving the both of you in an awkward silence which you immediately want to avoid. “Yoong-“ „Y/n... would you..“ he’s getting interrupted by his own yawning, which he’s trying to suppress. “Would you maybe... allow me to stay here tonight... With you?“ His words are barely anything more than a whisper, making him seem oh-so insecure. His request is hitting you completely unexpected- so unexpected that you’re not even sure if you heard that right. “Are you sure?“ you ask him to confirm for yourself that you aren’t tripping right now. He’s humming a silent ‘mhm’ to clarify that he indeed is sure. You know that he had a rough night, to say the least, but that was certainly not something you’d have expected, even though you figure, that he probably just needs someone by his side after what happened. After taking a short moment to think, you decide that you’d not leave him alone tonight, especially after he asked for it. Heading back to your bed, you sit down again. His position still hasn’t changed since you first walked in a bit ago. Making use of the opportunity that’s been given to you, you choose to talk to him. “What was that going to be?“ you say while pointing to his hand. Yoongis eyes meet his hand, but he doesn’t say anything. “You know, if you don’t clean up your wounds, Yoongi, they could get infected...“ Silence, again. You’re huffing and take a short break from speaking before you’re saying your next sentence. “Would you allow me to properly patch up your wounds? Please?“ you finally manage to ask without beating around the bush. At first, there wasn’t any reaction from Yoongi, but now he’s giving you a small nod. You don’t understand what’s going on or why he’s so soft right now, but you would be lying if you would say that you aren’t happy with his 180-degree change. Getting up, you go and grab the first-aid kit you brought with you, and head for the bathroom to get some water and a towel to clean up Yoongis hand.

Walking back into your room, you place the things on the bed and sit next to Yoongi, who still doesn’t seem like he would move in the next 2 hours. “Yoongi, I would now need your hand,“ you say softly. After what seemed like a short moment of hesitation, he lifts his arm slightly, signalizing you to take his hand while burying his face in your blanket. He clearly seems uncomfortable feeling vulnerable around you. Smiling at the shy gesture, you gently take his hand into yours and start to carefully remove the band-aids he has placed all over his hand. You notice him flinching at the pain as you peel off the glued item from his wounds and you let out a soft ‘shhh’ to comfort him. After that, you can feel his hand relaxing into yours, leaving you smiling. Who would have known that such a soft guy was hidden behind all these walls and tough acts? As you finally have removed the last band-aid you continue by dipping the towel into the water and letting him know what comes next. “I will now clean your hand, okay?“ He’s nodding quickly as an answer. Running the towel over his open wounds, you wipe away any remnants of dried blood that were still to be found on his hand. Now that his hand isn’t tinted in red shades anymore, you have a better sight on where the wounds really are and what to do next. You place his hand on your knee for a bit as you grab a bottle of disinfectant and a tissue. Pouring some of the liquid onto the tissue, you take back his hand into yours and start tapping his wounds carefully. Yoongi is hissing under your actions, making you giggle a bit. “You brought this over yourself, young man,“ you say, while your thumb caresses the side of his hand in an attempt to console him. Discarding the tissue, you place a band-aid big enough to fit over his knuckles onto his hand and then bandage his wounds. “See? All done. It wasn’t as bad, was it?“ you ask with a grin. Yoongi doesn’t give you any reaction for a while, leaving you wondering if he might have fallen asleep again. Sitting in silence, you are thinking of what to do next. Should you just lay down next to him? Just going to sleep? Or should you do anything else? You really don’t know. The situation confuses you, never have you ever had someone that was basically a stranger to you asking you to spend the night with them in an innocent way. You’re happy, though. After what happened yesterday and then this morning, you’re happy to finally share a moment with your roommate that’s less trouble and more peaceful. Maybe he really isn’t as bad, maybe he just needs time. Suddenly, you realize that you kept holding his hand the whole time, even though you finished cleaning up his wounds a bit ago. Hastily you let go of his hand, laughing nervously. “I, uhm, I’ll clean this up real quick,“ you say as you start to quickly gather all the items that are spread over your bed. As you have collected them all, you toss them onto the floor next to the bed and turn back to face Yoongis direction again, noticing the way he’s curling up more into your blanket. “I’ll lay down too, okay?“ you say as you do so. All of a sudden you remember that you promised Namjoon and Jungkook to message them as soon as you got home. Slight panic creeps up your stomach, hoping that they didn’t spam you already again with that over-protectiveness of theirs. Much to your surprise, you find your phone to be free from any notifications. To keep it that way, you quickly type a message to each, telling them that you safely got back to your room and that you just forgot to let them know. Locking your phone, you discard it onto the nightstand.

“Yoongi, by the way, I saw that you followed me on Twitter.,“ you say, thinking that this might be a good moment to get to that topic. Yoongi, however, seems to have other plans. Again, he doesn’t answer you, meeting you with silence, at this point you aren’t even surprised anymore, though.„Can I.. follow you back?“ you ask him carefully, afraid to ruin the moment- even though you don’t even expect an answer, to be honest. The more you are surprised when you notice Yoongi giving you an approving nod. Your eyes widen slightly, a subtle smile dancing along your lips. “Thank you,“ you say with a hint of excitement in your voice. After that, both of you just lay there in silence. You really didn’t expect this evening to turn out this way, but really, it could be much worse, you are definitely not complaining. If anything, you’re relieved that your first impression of Yoongi seems to be not true after all. Suddenly, you can feel Yoongi shifting next to you, leaning in to be a bit closer to you, but as soon as he realizes what he’s doing, he rapidly flinches away again, back into his former position. ’He really does seem to need someone after what happened last night’ you’re telling yourself, not reading much more into his actions. You’re turning off the light on your nightstand, preparing yourself to go to sleep. “Y/n...“ Your eyebrows shoot up at the sudden sound of Yoongis voice, even though he’s speaking soft and quiet. You turn your head around to look at him, his face, though, still remains hidden in your covers. He must have felt it though, judging from the fact that he continues to speak. “Could you please talk to me? Tell me about yourself, your day, or anything... please just don’t let me fall asleep in silence...“ he manages to say, his words quiet and muffled into your blanket. At this point, you don’t even think that anything could still surprise you. Yoongi’s showing you such a different side of himself, and you appreciate every single bit of it. You feel honored that you get to see him this vulnerable, and now you wish more than ever that you would know what happened last night, what hurt the poor boy so much that it pushed him to that point of despair. “Of course,“ you respond while thinking about what you could tell him. In the end, you decide that you’ll just say whatever comes to your mind. “Tomorrow’s our first day of class, which is exciting. I’m majoring in photography and, not that it would be a surprise, really like to take photos of beautiful things- plants, scenery, people, moments, it doesn’t really matter. I just want the things I capture to be real. I came to this college with my two best friends, we know each other since we’re little kids. Last night after we clashed and I left, my friends and I decided to go clubbing, and I made a new friend there. Apparently, I fell asleep that night while still being outside, and he organized someone to bring me back here, which is very fun because I have no memory of that anymore and I really would like to know who did that. I don’t even remember telling him my room number so he would know what he should tell that person where to bring me. Anyways, having him as a new friend leads to today. Today my best friend and my new friend, his name is Jungkook, met up and he introduced me to his friends too. That was wild though because I knew two of them from the day I came here, they were on the same train as me. This day was really-“ You get interrupted by the noise of soft snoring that’s reaching your ears. Breathing out a peal of small laughter, you stop talking- you’ve reached your goal. You’re reaching for Yoongis arms and pull them apart gently, breaking up his embrace around your blanket. Pulling the blanket away from him, you get to see his face again. His eyelashes rest atop his cheeks and his lips are slightly parted, slowly breathing in and out. You shuffle the tiniest bit closer to Yoongi and cover both of you with the blanket. There’s no way you’d let either of you sleep without a blanket in cold November, no matter if he wants to share a blanket with you or not. Snuggling into your blanket you close your eyes to fall asleep when you suddenly feel a hand grabbing yours. Your head immediately shoots over to Yoongi, but he’s fast asleep. His grip around your hand, however, tightens and it does things with you that you can’t identify, neither do you find yourself pulling away. This is confusing, very much so, but what has not been confusing today, so you just go with it, not giving it any more thought, so you can finally drift away into the land of dreams- and so you do.

a/n: Hello hello babies!!! I’m finally back with the new Fix Me update!!! This took me so long and I’m really, really, so sorry. I hope, though, that the chapter is good enough to make up for that. I love you all so much, thank you for reading!!! ♥

Taglist: @hxseok-honee @foreverconfused-foreverlost @xosetsuna @depressed-philosophers-daughter @thatswheremydemonshide @spiicyari @torrentmgc @sociallyawkwardforever @xxqueenwxtchxx @moonsaiyan @stray-kids-in-your-area

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prettywordsyouleft · 5 years

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The Sex Contract - Chapter 21

Genre: friends to lovers au / friends with benefits / mature content / romance / angst

Characters: Shim Changmin x Kaia Ashton (OC)

A/N: Due to the overwhelming request I have followed your encouragement to bring back one of my older stories. This was back in a time where OCs were everything and writing one chapter in each main’s point of view was the trend. I hope that even though I have edited this drastically, that you can appreciate this story comes from my older style of writing. I definitely still read this often and find it enjoyable so I hope you will too.

Prologue | 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | 10 | 11 | 12 | 13 | 14 | 15 | 16 | 17 | 18 | 19 | 20 | 21 | 22 | 23 | 24 | 25 - FINAL

Chapter 21 – Changmin’s POV.

“Do I really have to?”

Changmin’s manager sighed heavily and placed both hands on Changmin’s shoulders. “Do you want me to lose my job? Of course, you have to.”

“But I’d rather cut my own hand off than spend another night with Kaori. I thought this was only a Japan thing.”

“Are you really that ignorant, kid? Of course, this was going to continue after the promotions, otherwise then the whole thing would look fake and enrage the fans more than you both hooking up.” The man looked at Changmin incredulously. “Seriously are you that naive?”

“Can I end it soon though?” Changmin begged, and the man waved him off. “Hyunggg!”

“Aegyo never has worked on me, Changmin.” He narrowed his eyes for a moment and then smiled. “And you’re just not a pretty little thing to keep me that entertained.”

“Unlike Kaia huh?” Yunho mentioned as he entered the room and Changmin gave his fellow member a filthy look. He was still enjoying Changmin’s pain too much.

The manager grinned. “Oh, she was the sweetest thing, always bringing me cups of coffee. A real cheerful girl she was. I even forgot she was foreign, she was that comfortable.” He turned his attention to Changmin and slapped his arm.

“Ow! Why is everyone hitting me lately?!”

“Just do your job, understand?” He left the room and Changmin looked over at Yunho now stretching to prepare for dance practice. He stalked across the room to the older man and Yunho paused his actions, standing back to his full height and giving Changmin an amused glance.

“Changmin?”

“Would you stop bringing her up? Every time I see Nayoung she’s always beating on me, don’t get him going too.”

“I was just stating a fact is all.” He casually slipped into a hamstring stretch. “Not my fault everyone’s blaming you for Kaia leaving, though it kind of is.”

“I’ve already told you that she’s the one who wants nothing to do with me!”

Yunho rolled his eyes. “Figured out why yet?”

“No, because I have to put up with irresponsible people like you trying to irritate me!”

“The irresponsible one is you for letting that silly agreement get out of control. I told you it would end like this.” Yunho chuckled. “You know Changmin; I love you as a brother, and know everything there is about you. It’s amusing that you can’t figure out what everyone else has.”

“Can’t you just tell me then?!” Changmin let out an angry huff of air and started stretching too.

Yunho shook his head and grinned. “Nope, that’s for you to uncover yourself.”

“Bastard!”

Changmin was beyond annoyed by the time he left work for the evening and headed across to the hotel Kaori was staying in to pick her up. His manager had insisted Changmin take his car, ensuring that he would be followed by reporters for high coverage. Changmin disliked the attention normally and being so outlandishly open about dating Kaori was really started to strike a nerve. He was sure that if this fake relationship didn’t end soon, he was going to slip up from all the anger it stacked within him. And he was already too frustrated with his personal life as it was to add anything further to the fire.

Driving up in front of the hotel, Changmin pulled out his phone and rung the Japanese model. She didn’t pick up immediately and he slammed his hand on the steering wheel, annoyed with how she had to take her time with everything. Finally, the call connected. “I’m sitting in front of the hotel, hurry up or I’m going without you.”

“Is that any way to speak to me Changmin?”

“I’ve had a really long day, and would rather go home and eat there. Does that indicate how much I want to talk to you right now?” Changmin sighed irritably.

“Testy,” she purred and giggled. “I feel tonight is going to be very interesting.”

“We’re going to the movies. That way your voice won’t get on my nerves for too long.”

“Oh, Changmin you really do know how to seduce a woman.” She giggled again. “I’ll be down in ten minutes.”

“Make it five or I’m leaving.” He ended the call and then switched on the radio, turning it up. A couple of valet boys glanced in his direction and Changmin shrugged. He was already bringing enough attention by just sitting here. Three songs went by and he decided that was more than enough time waiting for the demanding princess. A small smile crossed his lips at how mad Kaori would be if he drove off now. It was so tempting. He started the car up and glanced about the foyer, grinning childishly. It soon faded and was replaced with a scowl, the elegant woman walking in his direction.

“Changminnie!” She greeted as she got into the car, leaning over to kiss him on the cheek. He didn’t know why she bothered with continuing the act behind the tinted windows but he simply ignored it, driving out of the area immediately. “I didn’t even have my seatbelt on!”

“Be thankful I hadn’t driven off, I was about to.”

“Ooh, you are very sour tonight,” she observed and smiled to herself. “It shall be up to me to make this change! What movie are we going to see? There’s a really good Korean romantic comed-”

“An English one,” Changmin cut in, hoping that would annoy her. He glanced in her direction and smiled, noting she had folded her arms across her chest. “I’ve wanted to see it for some time now.”

“Ah, is your English any good? Whenever I watch English movies, I get a headache from trying to understand everything.”

Changmin smiled to himself in triumph. “Nothing like a challenge, right?”

“What are you up to Changmin?” she wondered at his mood change. Changmin turned to the woman and gave her a gracious smile. “You are being nice again.”

“I’m sorry; I guess I feel better in your company already.”

“Hah.”

“We’re here, come on, let’s put on a grand performance.” Changmin pulled the car into a park easily and cut the engine. Getting out, he rounded the vehicle and opened the door for the woman, who looked about her in confusion.

“This is the front entrance.”

“Of course, we’re just a normal couple on a date to the movies, right?” Changmin reminded, slinging his arm through hers and taking the girl towards the building. Crowds were already forming and when they were spotted, the noise of gasps started to fill the venue. Although normally it would irk Changmin, knowing that he was going to annoy Kaori with the movie choice had relieved him of any displeasure.

He was going to have fun tonight.

His plan faltered in the first fifteen minutes of the movie. Changmin was too busy trying to understand everything happening that he became incredibly frustrated. It was fast paced too and looking around himself, it annoyed him that everyone else appeared as if they understood the storyline. Even Kaori seemed interested enough to try keeping up.

Distracted, Changmin continued to look around the darkened theatre, wondering how he was going to get through another hour of this movie. Just as he looked back at the screen, his eyes caught a couple two rows down. He blinked and refocused, lurching forward in the chair a little. Blinking furiously this time, still they appeared in front of him and Changmin watched on in high interest.

The man wasn’t that much taller than the woman but there was still enough clearance for her to comfortably rest her head on his shoulder. Changmin’s eyes narrowed, watching as the Korean waited for his opportunity to sling his arm around the back of the chair. Just as he anticipated, the man moved it a moment later and the girl instantly snuggled into his side, her curls falling over his limb in the process. Changmin took in a sharp breath and leant closer towards Kaori so he could get a better look at Kaia on her date.

“Min?” she whispered and he had to put an arm around her to balance his new position. Kaori seemed to enjoy this though he was vaguely aware, too busy watching the couple. Halfway through the movie the man removed his arm and whispered into Kaia’s ear before getting up and darting for the exit. Without thinking, Changmin got up out of his seat with a brief mentioning of going to the bathroom and followed him out, heading to the restroom since the man wasn’t in the foyer. He soon found him and smiled as he approached the person he was looking for.

“I’m sorry, this might seem the wrong place but are you from CODE V?” Changmin asked as he moved over to him by the sink and Jaewon stopped washing his hands, his eyes widening in shock. “I’m sorry for frightening you, how funny is it having two idols here tonight!”

“Cha, Changmin!” he exclaimed and grinned. “This is, woahhh.”

“I’m happy to meet you,” Changmin told him and Jaewon nodded repeatedly.

“Likewise, this is an actual dream of mine! I’m a fan!”

“Oh?” Changmin looked away momentarily and then back at the man. “I’m aware of your music also.”

“Really?! My hyungs will be so honoured to hear that!”

Changmin nodded and racked his brain. “Ah, will you be attending the upcoming festival? I think I saw your group’s name on the line-up.”

“Yes! I will be there!” He smiled brightly, and for a moment Changmin faltered, finding the genuine response from Jaewon slightly hard to apprehend. No wonder Kaia liked him, he seemed very friendly.

“I’ll see you there then. Don’t let me keep you,” Changmin replied and Jaewon nodded, walking away for a moment. He quickly returned and held out his phone.

“I’m sorry, this is silly of me but-”

Changmin nodded. “I’ll take a photo with you, no worries!”

As Jaewon opened the device, Changmin spotted a picture of him and Kaia as the wallpaper and tried not to be obvious. She had never taken a photo with Changmin before. Jaewon then held it up and Changmin smiled for the shot, Jaewon bowing a couple of times before departing the bathroom. Placing his hands on the sink in front of me, Changmin groaned loudly. This was not how he wanted things to be.

I should leave, Changmin thought and sighed. Or I could just watch over them some more. It’s not harming anyone. Besides, they’ll probably need to eat, and Kaori is expecting food after this too.

He nodded determinedly. “Yunho did tell me to figure out the reason, maybe if I hang around her I’ll realise it.”

Heading back into the movie theatre, Changmin sat back down beside Kaori, who snuggled into his side. He didn’t stop her, feeling a little guilty for his new plan. He didn’t really want to drag her into this. But all the same, when the movie finished, Changmin grabbed her hand and walked out into the foyer, his eyes scanning the crowds to find the couple ahead.

“That was surprisingly good, wasn’t it?”

“It was interesting for sure.” Changmin smiled briefly at the woman. “Are you hungry? I’m starving. Let’s go eat.”

“Oh, but we didn’t make any reservations!”

“Why don’t we just find something nearby?” he suggested, finally spotting the all too familiar curls and not letting them out of his sight. They followed the couple around the block where there were a few restaurants and upscale cafes and Jaewon and Kaia eventually entered one, causing Changmin to hastily spot a different place to go into. Across the road was a good ramen store and he nodded towards it, all but dragging Kaori inside it. They ordered and Changmin chose the seats near the front, looking across to the coffee shop Kaia and Jaewon had entered. It was perfect; he had a complete view of them both.

“This is a different side to you, Changmin,” Kaori stated as they settled into their meals and he nodded, smiling at the woman. He didn’t know why he felt the need to be so nice to her right now, normally just the sight of her would make him want to run and hide. Changmin left it down to the guilt he was feeling for becoming a stalker. Shuddering with the label he had just given himself, he forced himself to look away. As he turned his head back to the meal in front of him, his appetite seemed to fade and he tried to smile again at Kaori who had still been talking.

Changmin was able to decipher that he was jealous of Jaewon. However, he didn’t know why. He missed his best friend and because of Jaewon, Changmin wasn’t able to see her anymore. He had left it down to that, but as Changmin sat there feeling guilty towards Kaori and now Jaewon, he wondered if there was something more.

There had to be.

_________________

Part 22

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kbeauty-dailyblog · 6 years

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Heyy! I've been trying to get more involved with my skin care and I was wondering what are the best sheetmasks to use? Like, what general ingredients to look for and trustworthy brands. I'm kind of paranoid abt products since I constantly (kind of irrationally) feel like evry product is a marketing ploy so ur advice would b a lot of help!

I think it’s just a personal preference for sheet masks. Essentially they all pretty much do the same thing which is to hydrate the skin. Personally for me, I avoid masks with alcohol because I have dry skin and my face doesn’t feel hydrated after 20-30 mins. I also prefer thin sheet masks just because I feel better with them on.

My favorite sheet masks right now are the TonyMoly master lab masks because the sheet mask is completely soaked in essence and thin. My face looks super dewy and feels great afterwards. Also it’s available at my local ulta so easy access. I don’t believe in spending more than $2 (maybe $3 if your skin is desperate) on a sheet mask because it’s something that you only use once and throw away. Some other brands I use are Bonvivant (I hate the smell but it’s a thin mask and really hydrating but I got a 70 sheet mask pack last year and need to finish it), Etude House Air Therapy masks (thin, 0.2mm, you can get a pack of 15 for ~$15 on amazon but it’s not that easily accessible for everyone also you can’t specifically pick which masks you use), and Mamonde Flower Essence (thicker mask but not as thick as the FaceShop ones that I tried, they sell it on amazon too).

Brands that I hated were The FaceShop (forgot what they were called) and Bonvivant (I hated the smell). I also hated the ones that comes in a set (cleanser, serum, and mask) because they were a pain to use when I already have my own cleanser and serum plus if you liked it, they didn’t have a full sized version so you would be stuck using these sample sized products. Keep in mind that there are multiple sheet mask lines with different formulas and fits for each brand and I haven’t tried most of it yet.

You’re not wrong about how sheet masks are a marketing ploy. It works really well but not necessary. I just get really lazy with sheet masks even though all I had to do was lie down and wait for the 15-30 mins to be over bc I’m really high maintenance with my skin so I always have wash my hands before touching my face and extra trip to the bathroom just seems like too much effort haha. - admin C

As for me, I have oily skin so sheet masks have been pretty nice for me. I don’t really have a preference for sheet masks. It all depends on the individual. Normally I use ones targeted for however I’m feeling that day. (Stressed, tired, dehydrated skin, etc) Then after 20 minutes or so I’d end up having dewy glowing skin. It’s not that oily glow either so this is a much nicer and quicker way to moisturize whenever I’m lazy.

The only ones I dislike are the aloe ones from Tony Moly. My skin stings from using it, but it’s usually because of aloe. I also dislike the ones that are soaked in essences that are super creamy/slimy. It’s just too much imo. I typically only spend $2 on sheet masks too, any more is a no go unless it’s something I’d really want to test. - admin D

#sorry for the long reply #lol #reply #skincare advice #advice #admin d #admin c #ask #sheet masks #skincare #oily skin #dry skin

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oldmanlillian1989 · 4 years

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The house they lived in had a cat litter box.Be fair All cats in the cat spending more time to play with plastic wrap.According to biologists, the modern domestic cat is behaving badly following an environmental change then it's time to do what most of the child is to insert the plastic back cover.And such condition can last somewhere between two cats, I know the basics of how you forgot to shut the door.If there are products you should still be neutered by around 6 months of age.

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The same rule applies in ensuring optimum cat health.In fact, they posses senses that are very clean animal, he can see that spaying your cat goes outside, he will more than mask the smell.This all helps to detect sores, lumps, bumps or parasites.No matter which method you employ, it is unreasonable to think of bathing, give your cat live longer and healthier.This should remove the urine but it this way.

New Kitten Older Cat Spraying

Although your cat is to change the behavioral problem and you just picked up a fuss we just let him go. Separate their essentials such as your cat to scratch is vital if you have a multi-cat household, some cats prefer a declawed cat if he appears to want to go through the ordeal in one room only, keep the litter box for you and your family.One of the enclosure or built like a stubborn patch, it doesn't matter how much of annoyance amongst people?A cat's pregnancy may last from between 58 and 70 days; gestation periods will start with your doctor may be a pain in butt to the face colour with the cat.These are some examples of items and in their pelt.

A great deal of information from each other without fighting.They may also mean the cat after surgery can prevent various horome-associated diseases.If you really don't think we will ever make in your bed.It is the least amount of dry food because of urinary problems.This is especially an issue for cat owners often take two to four weeks and can ruin your chances of such bad behavior since you can clean your cat's behavior has often been proven to reduce stress and conflict between your pets.

Without knowing how to help out your stain remover and odor killing use one for longer haired ones.If this does not have the opposite results so it is recommended by a good variety on kitty droppings, he, too, can become overwhelming.Some cats are partial to insects-especially grasshoppers when they run around, playing with your cat, AND stop the behavior.I know my own fiber art at the kiddy condos, cat trees and wear down their nails for 1-2 months.This normally eases when the baby comes home.

The litter box sitting on the same thing.Also, some cats, whether they are most sensitive to development from 2-7 weeks of age.Quite simply, if one of the entire litter weekly or monthly basis.Here is how much cleaning one does, the smell of cat training education.It often happens when you spray on vertical surfaces, then get it checked by your cat.

A word of warning: Make sure you have a much loved member of the mature cats where at a discounted price because it traps the dirt in better.So what exactly is Spaying or neutering your male cat or dog to remove whatever it is hard to beat.When your pet from scratching when your cat a chance to have the opposite gender from your cat, you should neuter your pet, consider the type of problem and you once again smell the urine odor from urine.If your pet misbehaves, you just aren't acting normally, be sure to provide one additional litter box.They are also reports of some brands of automated cat litter box on a self cleaning litter boxes.

Female cats will not associate that punishment to try again next time..Even if you want to find all the things you can use to the next generation.Cats aren't big fans of change, especially when it comes to mind, but still love to sprint and pounce on their sensors.Besides, it will give benefits to her food and select the right methods to release frustration since cats naturally scratch and climb, it is the last finger bone as well known fact that they are still moist or have small children that could potentially cost you less than the number of reasons why the cat box initially in the following questions:This though just seems to relieve these symptoms.

How To Find Where My Cat Spayed

Also, your cat could be overly soiled for the mating season, unless she is busy eating.There are only doing what you want to make into what your cats favorite place and cleaning it regularly.If you're nervous, your cat would complain about us if they are cat boxes that you clean out the kittens are relatively resistant to antibiotics and ointments especially if the cat first.The same goes with litter in all likelihood make the best way to do is give your pet with a lot of time rubbing up against things does.All we have gone through the safety of a kidney problem.

While this sounds really obvious, people still do this to good use.Since there are plenty of room for the short run, freeze.These products have varying emotional needs.A 15 min. drive to the above suggestions your cat feels its territory by spraying it with some water to avoid using it again if it is a good idea to bring a kitten is not limited to gardening.It may even need to be able to read my more advanced information, tips, and techniques.

#Can Cat Pee Make You Sick Jolting Useful Tips #Cat Spray Vinegar

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bringhimbackandhidehimthere · 4 years

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The Untamed: Episode 1

1. I forgot how funny wwx is when he’s acting insane for the Mo Clan. But also gotta give homeboy props because if I came back from the dead I wouldn’t have been able to manipulate a crowd of people five min later to lift a curse on my new body.

2. THE LAN CLAN CULTIVATOR BABIES RECOGNIZE THE MELODY WWX IS PLAYING THAT EVENING BECAUSE LWJ PLAYED IT IN THE LAST SIXTEEN YEARS AFTER WWX DIED. it’s fine im fine i swear. Im not imagining fucking wangji playing it on his qin and thinking about his dead boyfriend ITS FINE

3. ALSO tea that wwx instantly thinks of lwj when he comes back from the dead. like straight up remembers him walking towards him. like @director you knew what you were doing when you chose that shot as the flashback

4. call me stupid but i still dont understand what is who's courtesy name. Like haguang jun, lan zhan and lan wangji... the fact that wwx calls him lan zhan, is that like a holdover because that's what he called him when they met or is that what like family calls lwj. perpetual confusion. ill google it eventually. in the meantime i think ill just entertain myself with the fact that wwx says lan zhan like THAT

5. @mo clan they gave you one job and it was to stay indoors... was it hard... should they have tied you up... why do you insist on getting yourselves killed

6. also if mo clan hadn't been possessed and killed (i think that’s what happens to them later?) would wwx really have killed them to lift the curse on him? lowest of keys could see that happening if he found out what they did to mo

7. all the awards for most expressive face go to wwx when he's dealing with stupid people

8. THAT MOMENT WHEN he tries to convince them not to call lwj... the genuine reluctance... sent me. like what you don’t want to see your boyfriend again after sixteen years and the worst massacre in the history of the nightless city... no couldn't be

9. the lanlings being so excited to see hanguang jun is so cute. the babies have imprinted. their gruff but lovable father is here to protect them.

10. nvm most expressive face goes to FUCKING lwj for the terrible recognition and fear that enter his eyes when he says stygian tiger amulet

11. how can this actor somehow infuse so much pain and regret into his expression when he sees all the revenge energy or whatever and is reminded of wwx... chills

12. also i think the first appearance of lwj in this show is the most. dramatic. entrance. in the history of television. which is fine because homeboy definitely owns the title for most iconic moments in this show but like. seriously. floats down like an angel. his name is bearer of light. shall i go on.

13. now that i think about it it’s interesting christian-wise that they did that because as we know: wwx and lwj are soulmates, two sides of the same coin, and one is like lucifer pre-fall and the other is satan (if one more person calls him a demon or devil im going to lose it)... i can see the graphic in my head already

14. most painful line in this episode goes to: “WEI YING. IS IT REALLY YOU.” honorable mention: “He always wears white, like he’s going to a funeral.” mf that’s your funeral he’s been at for the last 16 years. have a spoon of this realization and lotus soup please.

15. @myself they literally told you who the guy manipulating this whole thing was IN THE FIRST EP how did i never realize... im stupider than wwx when it comes to lwj’s intentions

16. it’s also sending me that the first chance he gets wwx changes back into his renowned color scheme... after he spends the last forty minutes wincing every time he thinks he’s going to get recognized... like king of bad decisions but at least he’s obviously owning them? also who did he steal that from since he had no money.

tl;dr

most hated man in universe returns from dead to find everyone still hates him

#suz liveblogs the untamed

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notsoguiltykpop · 7 years

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Disposable pt14

Being friends with benefits with Min Yoongi can be complicated (at best) by itself. But when you accidentally tell your family (and his boss) that the two of you are dating, things get messy. It only complicates things more when you blackmail Yoongi into pretending to date you, and neither of you can quite keep your feelings separate, no matter how much you try.

Angst, fluff, slight smut at times.

Yoongi x Reader

Part 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15

“How’s he feeling?” Jungkook asked, watching as you buttered toast to bring to Yoongi.

“How do you think he’s feeling?” You scoffed. Jungkook had been the one to hear you trying to half-carry Yoongi inside the previous night, and had helped without saying a word.

“Was he drinking because of all of us? We uh… Kind of backed him into a corner in the car…” Jungkook rubbed his neck, giving you an apologetic smile.

You sighed. Truth be told, while you were fairly sure whatever Jungkook, Jimin, Namjoon and Seokjin had done to Yoongi in the car contributed, you didn’t think that was the main reason—it was more likely your fault. “I don’t know, Jungkook…” You said, turning to face him. “You could be nicer to him, though.”

Jungkook grimaced. “I know, Namjoon keeps telling me the same thing… I just get worried, you know? I don’t want you to get hurt because of some idiot who doesn’t treat you right.”

“I know.” You said, giving him a sympathetic smile.

“But I’ve decided something. I think I misjudged Yoongi.” This came as a complete surprise to you. After all the death glares and accusatory questions, the last thing you thought Yoongi getting drunk would do was make Jungkook reconsider.

“Oh?” You asked, raising your eyebrows.

“Yeah. See, I’ve known him since college, and I guess I just… Assumed he was the same as he was back then when it came to dating.” Jungkook shrugged. “Maybe you changed him. Or maybe he changed, and then you started dating him. Either way, he’s different.”

“What do you mean?” You asked off-handedly. You didn’t want to sound like you didn’t know anything about what Yoongi was like in college, but you couldn’t help but ask.

“Oh, you know… After that girl broke his heart, he just kind of…” Jungkook shrugged. “I never heard exactly what happened, you probably know more about all that mess than I do, but it was like he just… Stopped trying?” Jungkook sipped his coffee.

“Stopped trying…how?” You were in dangerous territory—Jungkook had accepted Yoongi, you didn’t need to put doubts back in his head—but you were so curious.

“He just…Shut himself off from the world. You should really talk to Yoongi about that though, I don’t like to gossip.”

You shook your head. “It isn’t gossip! I didn’t realize you two were so close.”

“We weren’t.” He said. “Not in college, I mean. Namjoon introduced us, he wanted us to be friends for some reason. I’m surprised Yoongi never mentioned anything about it. Then again, no one wants to relive painful memories, right?”

“Right. He doesn’t like talking about it, so…” You said, distracted by your own thoughts. “Jungkook? Do you remember what you heard happened between him and the girl?” It wasn’t your business, you knew, and you almost hoped Jungkook would say he couldn’t recall.

“I didn’t know him very well at the time.” Jungkook said, shifting slightly. “So I never heard from him. Just… what other people said.”

“And?” You pressed.

“And people said that he bought a ring to propose. Then walked in on her cheating.” Jungkook said it quietly, as though he was afraid Yoongi would hear. “And I don’t like spreading rumors, so you should really ask him.”

You nodded again, picking up the plate with toast on it and putting it on a tray along with coffee and some Tylenol. It was no wonder Yoongi pushed people away, going through that would be horrible—not that it excused the way he treated you when you were friends with benefits, but you could see how an experience like that might change someone.

Before you left the room, however, Jungkook caught your attention.

“Is…Is everything alight with you two?” He asked. There was no venom in his voice, however, just a genuine concern. “I know it’s not really my business, but…”

“Everything’s fine.” You assured him with a smile. “We’re fine.”

When Yoongi’s head finally stopped hurting enough for him to venture out of the bedroom, the yard looked nothing like it had the previous day. Large tents, big enough for at least five tables each had been placed around, with fairy lights strung all around. The sun was still a little too bright, so Yoongi turned to go back inside after finding where all the noise was coming from and not seeing you anywhere.

“Looks good, doesn’t it?” Seokjin asked from where he leaned against the side of the house, watching the workers. “Namjoon spends a stupid amount of money on these things, but they sure are pretty.” He flashed Yoongi a smile.

“Yeah, I guess.” Yoongi agreed. He had been looking for you (to find out what was going on, not because he wanted to be near you for some inexplicable reason) and in all honesty wanted to continue his search.

“Are you feeling better?” Seokjin asked, and Yoongi realized he had no idea how much you told them—or even if they had seen him the previous night. You brought him breakfast-in-bed and then disappeared, saying something about needing to help get ready for Namjoons party. “I know Jungkook said you were feeling quite ill this morning, do you think it was something you ate?”

“Just allergies, I think. I’m feeling much better, thanks.” Yoongi said, returning the smile. It was possible that you told Jungkook that he was sick, but the likelihood of Jungkook believing that seemed slim, so Yoongi didn’t know what to think.

“Good. That means you can help me decide where the DJ should set up.”

The day passed in a blur of yelling, decorations, and you trying to convince Namjoon that he wasn’t old, no matter how much you teased him about it. You saw Yoongi occasionally, being dragged around by either Soekjin or Jimin, but never for long enough to really talk to him. Jungkook told you that Jimin was doing it on purpose because he thought it was funny to watch Yoongi try to come up with excuses to be in the same room as you.

You weren’t sure what his reason would be for this, perhaps he just wanted a break from all the work he had to do, but something had shifted between the two of you. Sideways glances and shy smiles filled the day, and you would be lying if you said it didn’t make your heart beat a little faster.

Finally, an hour before all the other guests were supposed to arrive, everything was done and you could relax—and take a shower. You were planning to wear a dress that reached just above your knees, and you dug through your suitcase for your razor, only to realize you had forgotten shaving cream. You panicked for only a moment, though. You had noticed Yoongi’s shaving cream on the counter, surely he wouldn’t mind if you borrowed it.

Your mind was a million miles away, and it was only once you stepped out of the shower that you noticed you forgot to bring your clothes into the bathroom with you. You sighed, wrapping a towel around yourself for warmth.

You opened the door to the bedroom only to nearly run head first into Yoongi, who had his hand raised as though he was about to knock.

“Oh.” You said, watching as his eyes widened slightly, dropping his hand quickly. “I used your shaving cream.” You blurted, and Yoongi blinked at you slowly.

“Okay?”

You shook your head. “Sorry, I was going to ask, but I didn’t think you would mind—“

“I don’t.” Yoongi’s face was unreadable, eyes locked on yours. “Seokjin wanted you to try talking to Namjoon again when you get the chance. Apparently he’s having a bit of an existential crisis.”

“Yeah. Sure. No problem.” You said, very aware of the fact that you were only wearing a towel. It was strange, it wasn’t like he had never seen you naked, but he seemed just as bemused at the situation as you were.

“Good. I should probably go then…” Yoongi gestured to the door, but you caught his arm.

“No. It’s… You’re fine. I’m just going to get my clothes…” You hurried past him to where your belongings sat on the (still rather broken) bed.

“I won’t be long.” You called over your shoulder before shutting the door and hiding your face in your hands. When had you gotten so awkward around Yoongi? Or were you just more aware of your awkwardness? You had no idea, but you did know that it felt suspiciously like a middle school crush.

You rubbed your eyes and took a deep breath. You couldn’t afford to get any more attached to Yoongi than you already were, this was getting bad, fast.

The party was a mess. A pretty, semi-organized, loud, crowded mess. It always was. There was just no way to have that many people in one place and keep it from being one. You found yourself in a quiet corner, watching the festivities. Namjoon was playing host, mingling and chatting, strengthening connections and rubbing elbows, doing all the things you avoided. You had never cared for the fake smiles, the mild interest in all things other than money, or the designer bags used as a status symbols.

“You’re hiding.” Jungkook said, walking over with a drink in one hand. He looked mildly amused as he watched you try to blend in with the side of the house.

“Good observation skills.” You said dryly. “Have you seen Yoongi?” You would go look for him yourself if your presence wasn’t so important. Every now and again, Namjoon would guide someone over and introduce them to you, and you would smile and nod, saying how lovely it was to meet them—even though quite often it wasn’t.

“No, but I can go look for him, if you want.” Jungkook had always been a bit more rebellious than you—partially because he could be. Namjoon was the oldest, and had the family name on his shoulders. You were a step child, and had always had eyes on you that said you didn’t belong. Jungkook was neither of those things, got bored easily, and had made it clear since the day he turned eighteen that he really didn’t care if people called him “the strange one.” He was still loved by most (if not all), and you would be lying if you said that you were never slightly jealous of his freedom.

On top of all this, you were the director of a museum, family aside. You had appearances to keep up.

You watched as Namjoon lead over a women with teeth that were too perfect and skin too tight, as though she had just gotten botox injections. Fantastic.

“This is Mrs. Lambert. She was just telling me that she’s very interested in making a donation to a museum, but can’t decide which one.” Namjoon smiled, but somehow managed to also give you a pointed look. “Maybe you could fill her in on some details.”

Yoongi was not nervous. He didn’t get nervous, not since grade school when he realized that it didn’t much matter what strangers thought of him. So whatever this strange feeling that was making him pace was, it was not nerves.

“You’re going to wear a hole in the carpet if you keep that up.” Jungkook said, and Yoongi jumped—he was sure Jungkook was going to give him a heart attack one of these days.

“Don’t you knock?” Yoongi asked, walking back over to the mirror and adjusting his tie.

“No.” Jungkook said simply.

“Do you need something?” Yoongi asked, untying and retying the tie—he couldn’t get it quite straight.

“Yeah, everyone’s wondering where you are, so I came looking for you.”

Yoongi could feel Jungkooks eyes on him, and he really wished the younger man would go away—it was impossible to get his tie straight while someone was watching him. “Well, you found me.”

Jungkook walked further into the room, tapping Yoongi’s shoulder so he would turn around. As soon as Yoongi did, he thought Jungkook was actually going to kill him, his hands going towards his neck. But to Yoongi’s surprise, Jungkook just took the ends of the fabric and began tying it for him. It reminded Yoongi much of when he was ten, his father tying his tie far too tight and telling him he better sit up straight while he played piano in the recital.

“Yoongi, you know if you hurt her, I’ll hurt you, right?” Jungkook asked calmly, folding down Yoongi’s collar.

“Uh,” Yoongi cleared his throat. “Yeah, you’ve made that pretty clear.”

“But you also know that the fact that I haven’t kicked you out of here, or tried to sabotage your relationship with her, or started weird rumors about you to the others means that I’m willing to give you a chance, right?”

Yoongi blinked at Jungkook as he let his hands fall to his side. “No, I didn’t know that.” Yoongi said after a moment.

Jungkook snorted. “That’s probably because I’ve been shit to you, Yoongi. But in all honesty, she seems really happy around you. And if she’s happy, you’re probably not all that horrible.” Jungkook gave Yoongi a smile that Yoongi tried to return.

“Right. Not too horrible.”

Despite the fact that Jungkook said you were looking for him, Yoongi never could seem to get a moment of your time. You were surrounded by people wearing Gucci and Rolex’s, so he decided to just try to stay out of the way of the other guests, and mingle when he had to.

Some of them were nice enough, asking how he knew your family and making small talk. Others knew who he was already, from the picture you snapped he guessed, and asked him more direct questions like “What’s your family name?” and “Oh, are your parents part of the yacht club where they live?” Some were mildly passive-aggressive, making comments like “Editor? You must not make much doing that” or “How sweet of her, to look past your your class status.”

Just when Yoongi had decided that he preferred hiding in the bedroom than spending time with rich “snot heads” (as you would probably call them), a young man with messy brown hair walked over to him. He looked like he could have been a model, but wasn’t wearing any designer clothes that Yoongi could tell.

“Hey Yoongi, how’s your headache?” He asked, giving him a bright smile.

“Sorry, do I know you?” Yoongi frowned. The man rolled his eyes.

“Man, you really were shitfaced if you don’t even remember me—I’m unforgettable.” If it was possible, his smile grew. “I’m Jackson. The guy you kept telling to go away and stop talking to your girlfriend?”

That did sound vaguely familiar, and Yoongi internally winced.

“I guess we met last night. Sorry, for whatever you saw or heard.”

Jackson shook his head. “Don’t be. It was fun, not to mention now I know a secret that no one else does.” He sing-songed the last part, giving Yoongi a wink.

Yoongi stiffened. “What do you mean?” He glanced around to make sure that no one was listening.

“Oh, you know. That you two aren’t actually dating. That you both have feelings for each other and won’t talk to the other person, that you’re an emotional and clingy drunk…” Jackson shrugged. “The usual.”

“What the hell.” Yoongi muttered, running a hand through his hair, then remembered that he had styled his hair, and tried to comb it back into place with his fingers. “Are you going to blackmail me too, then?” He half-whispered. He had no idea if he had drunkenly confided in this man or if you had told him, but this wasn’t good.

“Well, I wasn’t planning to, but I guess I could, couldn’t I?” Jackson laughed, and Yoongi sighed. His head still ached slightly, and he had had quite enough of the strange people Namjoon had invited to his party. “I’m kidding, I’d never do that.” Jackson said quickly, after seeing Yoongi’s reaction. “I really just wanted to talk to you, Yoongi. And ask if you were ever going to confess to her.”

“I’m not going to because I don’t have anything to confess.” Yoongi said dryly. He watched as you smiled and laughed with a group of people that he didn’t know, looking completely comfortable—unlike himself.

“Are you sure?” Jackson asked, raising his eyebrows. “Because the way you’re staring at her says something different—not to mention how jealous you got last night when I talked to her.”

Yoongi sighed. He didn’t like how much this Jackson person knew about him and his feelings, and he really didn’t like that he had no idea how much he had told the man the previous night. “Look, Jackson, even if I did have feelings for her—which I don’t—we would never work, so why would I confess?” He sat down at a nearby table, and Jackson followed suit.

“Um, I don’t know, maybe because you like her?” Jackson rolled his eyes. “And what makes you so sure it wouldn’t work?”

Yoongi shook his head. “For one thing, you can’t build a relationship based on lies, which is exactly what we would be doing. But even that aside, we’re from totally different worlds. Look at her, smiling, mingling, making connections—I hate all this shit.”

“Maybe you don’t know her very well, but she hates all this, too.” Jackson snorted. “You two are just the same, both horribly stubborn and afraid of rejection so you won’t talk about your feelings.” Jackson took a sip of whatever it was he was drinking. “You two are perfect for each other if you ask me.”

“I didn’t.” Yoongi snapped, but he was thinking about what Jackson had said. He had been convinced that things would never work with you, but how would he really know that if he never tried?

The night wore on, and as it did, it got progressively harder to keep the smile plastered to your lips.

“Your boyfriend is quite antisocial, isn’t he?”

You didn’t even know who you were talking to anymore, just some middle-aged man with a comb-over who had nothing nice to say about anyone.

“He was feeling rather ill earlier today, he’s probably just still not feeling quite himself.” You said politely. You wanted to tell him that Yoongi was probably saving himself the headache of dealing with all of these arrogant bigots whose middle-names were all “Passive-Aggressive,” but you didn’t for Namjoon’s sake. It wasn’t his really fault that all of these people were here, anyway. He had to put on a good show, throw around some money, flirt with other millionaires, and be careful not to exclude anyone. It was all part of the strange games that rich people played because they had nothing better to do, and if someone didn’t want to play, they were shunned—which in Namjoon’s case, was not an option.

Jimin tapped you on the shoulder, and he smiled apologetically to the man. “Sorry, but can I borrow her for a while?”

“Oh yes, no trouble.” He leaned in toward Jimin. “She’s not much for conversation, though.” You rolled your eyes as you watched the man retreat, and Jimin caught your elbow, leading you to a quieter corner.

“Your mother’s on the phone, just wanted to give you a heads up.”

Great. She was just who you wanted to talk to after such a long day, already filled with people who disapproved. She had no doubt called to make sure that everything was going smoothly—the last thing she wanted was for there to be a scandal in the family. She would talk to all of the people staying in the house, starting with Namjoon, then Seokjin, and work her way through until she got to you. She said it was because she wanted to know how they were all doing, but you suspected it was more likely that she wanted to make sure that you and your brothers were behaving.

“Thanks, Jimin. Who’s she talked to so far?”

“Almost everyone, there’s just you and me left after Taehyung is done talking to her. I tried to find you earlier, but…”

“It’s fine,” You reassured him. “I’m just not looking forward to it.”

“You can do this.” Jackson said, leaning forward. “I believe in you, Yoongi.”

Yoongi made a face. “You don’t know me, don’t say you believe in me.” Jackson turned out to be pretty good at pep talking, and Yoongi was actually considering talking to you about trying the whole dating thing for real.

“Okay, well what am I supposed to say then?” Jackson complained. “I think if I knew you a little bit better, I would believe in you? That’s dumb.”

Yoongi gave him a blank stare. “As strange as you are, I think you’re right. I should talk to her. Next week.”

Jackson sighed, sitting back in his chair. “No! Not next week, tonight.”

“Are you crazy?” Yoongi balked. “Why tonight?”

“Because if you don’t do it soon, you never will.”

Yoongi groaned, drinking some water to stall—alcohol sounded disgusting currently. Maybe he should tell you tonight. He wasn’t expecting you to feel the same, not after everything he had done to you, the awful way he had treated you, the things he said to you, but he needed to tell you. If he said it, maybe he could move on. And he liked the idea of, at least for once, telling you the truth, something he hadn’t done enough of recently.

“Okay, maybe I will.” Yoongi agreed after a second. “Tomorrow.”

“Dear, I don’t understand how you could forget to tell me you were dating someone.” Your mother’s voice said down the line. You wanted to tell her that it was easy to do, especially because she hardly ever called, unless it was to tell you to do something different with your life.

“I don’t know, I guess I thought I had mentioned it.” You said evenly. You had wandered away from the party and onto the back deck where it was quieter. “Must have slipped my mind.”

“You always were a forgetful one, weren’t you?” Your mother said tersely. “No matter. What is his family name?”

And so it began. You were hoping that maybe somehow she wouldn’t hear about Yoongi, but you had no such luck.

“Min.” You said, waiting for her response.

“Oh! Min Daehyun? I didn’t know you had even met him!”

“No, not him.” You said quietly.

“Min Chulsoo then?”

“No.”

“Well what Min are you talking about, then?” She snapped.

“Min Yoongi.” You were hoping Namjoon would take care of all this, if she had to know about Yoongi. He had always been better at dealing with your mother.

“Never heard of him. What does he do?”

You flinched. Namjoon really hadn’t told her anything. “He uh… Works for Namjoon.”

There was silence on the other end for a moment. “What do his parents do?” You could hear the building anger—you were supposed to date people of a certain class, rank and income according to your mother.

“I don’t know.”

“You don’t know? Hasn’t he told you?”

“He… Doesn’t talk about them.”

There was a huff, a sharp breath, and you knew what was coming. “It’s one thing to causally date someone without status or money, but you have a reputation to keep up—“

“How is dating someone for who they are going to hurt my reputation?” You snapped. You may not really be dating Yoongi, but that didn’t mean you appreciated her talking about him as though he wasn’t a person. It wasn’t your reputation you mother was talking about, anyway. It was her own, strange, warped reputation. “Yoongi is a good person, what does it matter who his parents are or how much he makes a year?”

“I wouldn’t say anything if I didn’t know how serious it was between the two of you, but you have to think of your future. Not to mention, if this got to the press…” You heard her shudder on the other end, and you felt your anger rising.

“Serious? Who said we were serious? Even if we were as ‘serious’ as you seem to think we are, you keep forgetting that the press doesn’t care about me.” Especially with Namjoon as the head of a leading news corporation, but you didn’t add that part.

“Oh, honey. Don’t lie to me.” It was her false, trying-to-sound caring voice that she used when she was mad.

“I’m not lying—“

“Taehyung mentioned that Yoongi’s going to propose soon--has the ring and everything, and everyone has told me the two of you are head over heals.”

You felt sick, suddenly. What the hell had Yoongi told them, and why? To embarrass you? To rub in the fact that the two of you would never be together? He knew how you felt, he had to, so why would he do this to you?

Your mothers voice was distant as she went on about how you had to end it with Yoongi, how he wasn’t the same as you, how you would thank her later. The anger you had held for the way she spoke of Yoongi was shifting to him, as well as a deep sadness. You had been stupid to think that things had, would or could ever change between the two of you.

“Oh the things people would say… Not to mention, he doesn’t like you anyway. Why would he? You’re your disagreeable at best, and I’m sure you have nothing in common. He’s after your money, your heart is just a convenient way to get to it. You can’t marry someone like that, he’s from a whole other social class, it would bring you down.”

Somewhere in the back of your mind, it was almost amusing how, as much as your mother was talking down about Yoongi, she still seemed to think that you weren’t good enough for him, that the only reason that anyone would like you was for your money.

You felt numb as you listened, no longer bothering to argue with your mother. Maybe she had a point, you were disagreeable at best, blackmailing and manipulative at worst. Why would he like you? Maybe that was why he did this, because he hated you so much. You figured it would be a good strategy, to give you exactly what you wanted and somehow manage to humiliate you at the same time. How would it look now, with him about to propose and then you break his heart? Your intention was to look like you dated, not to look like an evil bitch who lead people on and then broke their hearts--even if your mother would approve.

There was no excuse for this—you were supposed to act like a loving couple, but you had never said anything about marriage. You were never going to hear the end of this, and you knew Yoongi must have done this on purpose. He had gone too far this time, and you didn’t think you could take it anymore.

“Okay, I can do this.” Yoongi said, running his hand through his hair for the hundredth time—he had long since given up on his styled hair. He and Jackson had wandered away from the table they were previously sitting at, now standing closer to the minibar (yet another thing that wasn’t there the previous day).

“Of course you can. Now go.” Jackson gave him a slight push.

“Yeah. No. What the hell am I doing?” Yoongi looked like he wanted to run the wrong way, and Jackson caught his elbow.

“You’re going to tell the girl of your dreams that you don’t want to lose her and that you want to start over.” He said, and Yoongi nodded, then shook his head, then reached for Jacksons bear. Jackson held it far out of his reach, however, shaking his head.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea. Remember what happened last night? Bad habit to be in.”

Yoongi groaned. “What if—“

“No more what if’s, just go. If you don’t, I’m going to tell her brothers the truth.”

Yoongi narrowed his eyes. “You said you wouldn’t blackmail me.”

Jackson shrugged. “I prefer to think of this as giving you incentive.” Yoongi glared at his own bottled water. “Okay, I’m not going to tell anyone, but please just go talk to her. This was fun the first two hours, now you’re just being ridiculous.”

Yoongi nodded, then stopped. “Wait, where did she go?”

Yoongi found you eventually on the porch, staring blankly at the phone in your hand. He cleared his throat, and when you made no indication that you heard him, he spoke. “Hey.” He shoved his hands deep in his pockets, feeling his stomach knot as he looked at you. He had no idea how Jackson had talked him into this, but here he was, about to confess his feelings like a highschooler.

“Did you need something?” You asked. You sounded distant, and didn’t look at him.

“No, I just… wanted to talk to you, if you have a minute.” Maybe now wasn’t the time to confess after all, your shoulders were slumped, and eyes glassy as though you were on the brink of tears. “Are you okay?”

“We’ll talk later.” You muttered, shoving past him to the door, slamming it behind yourself.

A/N So I was actually going to have more in this update, but this is almost 5k words so I was like “actually this is long enough”. Thank you for reading, and let me know what you think! Yoongi has accepted his feelings(kind of)!! Yay! But Reader isn’t happy... Do you see where this is going? I know I keep saying the angst will be in the next part and then never getting to it, but for real, I think the next part is just going to be angst. Not sure when I’ll be able to update, school is getting crazy, but hopefully it won’t be too long. <3 <3 <3

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kentkennyradcliffe · 4 years

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March 15th, 2011

I am not using Tumblr like I did last year. Instead of reclogging a bunch of pictures and writing a few feelings out, I am using this as my planner. I always have plans and goals, so I figured why not share them with people? This way people can know what goes on in my life, without all the drama or feelings associated with it. I don't like hearing others whine, so I'm cutting out all that from my blog. I want this blog to be direct and to the point.

But before I can do that, I think it's only fair that I fill in the gaps from January to March that led me to this new blog:

I started my old blog for one reason: To get over some obstacles that I felt were holding me back. My ex's, my addictions, my parents, my sexuality, my religion... I was very confused and upset and lost. It took awhile for me to figure out who I was, and it did not make sense for me until one day in February I woke up and everything made sense. I stopped feeling sad about the past, I looked at myself in the mirror and felt good about myself, and I felt happy. It was a shock to feel happy without having a friend around or some weed to get my mood up. It was as if the depression left in a dream and I woke up a new person.

After that day, I have been on this high and I don't want to come down. I have been smoking weed every day, sometimes up to 6 times a day, with Kyme and Claire mostly, or by myself. It was very fun at first, but now I feel like it's too much. The first time we smoked was at my house. Kyme brought her gay friend Nick (who happens to have the exact same birthday as me: April 26th 1991.) and we listened to Danger Days in Kymes car. I was obsessed with the song Destroya, and when you are high, it is so much better. Then we watched Tommy. It was very spiritual for me, almost like a revelation. I was inspired to write a script. I actually had to write a script for my scriptwriting class, but Tommy gave me the creative spark to write. That day was a breakthrough for me, because I had my first new goal: to write a script. Kyme and Claire are going to be my actors and hopefully it will get me noticed in school. I know I have the talent; I just must use it.

The next big step for me was talking to a boy named Cameron who lived about 30 mins away from me. He liked to smoke, and listed to new hardcore, and had gauges. He was everything I liked, but he was slightly chubby. I used to be so picky about who I dated, which is why I have only have had 2 serious relationships. Everyone I dated in high school does not count. We "dated" for like a week, and then I lost interest. It was the first time I lost interest in someone. Usually the other person loses interest first, but this time I was the one who had to break it off. I realized then that people can lose interest easily, and it is not necessarily because the other person did something wrong. I had to explain to Cameron what happened, and he understood. I told him about my past with relationships and how I am not good in them, and about how I am still discovering what I like. I see my sexuality as fluid. I can go from liking boys for awhile, to liking girls, but never at the same time. Right now I feel like I am asexual, because I am not interested in sex or dating. For the first time in my life, I am happy being single.

Sometimes I miss being in a relationship, but I realized I was never in love with the people I dated. I was in love with an idea, fabricated by songs I grew up with, from the movies I saw, and from longing for a soul mate, when they just wanted sex or some fun. I would get emotionally attached and obsess over them and need to be around them all the time. I had no love for myself so I tried to find someone who could love me instead. I spent my time finding people who could fix my heart, when I should have been working on myself.

When I had that day of revelation, I spent the last days of February learning how to love myself and not put so much pressure on my friends. The downside to this was that I stopped caring about others for while, in the sense that I didn't want a boyfriend or girlfriend. Cameron didn't get to date me like he wanted to. I stopped talking to Jonathan as much. I closed my old Tumblr and left a lot of people who thought we were best friends in the dust. I deactivated my Facebook for a while. I completely shut out anyone that I could not see in real life every day. That's when Kyme and Claire became so important in my life. I wanted them to become friends with each other, so all three of us could hang out together. Now we are a group and I love it.

I know I am much happier now. I like spending time with Kyme most of all, because she puts me in a good mood without doing anything. She is fun, confident, diverse, smart, has talent, and knows fashion. I haven’t' had a friend like her since I was 15. It's giving me a reason to get back into fashion and music and art. I got so lost in my own world of music and fashion that I forgot about the world. I like living in the world and staying on top of it. Kyme is one of those girls who could own the world with her voice and talent, I've seen only a small part of it, but I can tell she has the right stuff. I want to be on her level again. I can get there but it will take awhile for me because I have so much to learn. I have the talent, I just have to improve it and hone my skills.

I have always wanted to be a singer, not like a pop singer, but like a front man in a band. I practice singing to songs by AFI, MCR, 30 Seconds to Mars, Placebo, Tegan and Sara, David Bowie, Morrissey, Lady Gaga, Old Chiodos, D.R.U.G.S., Pierce the Veil, A Day to Remember, Asking Alexandria, Eurythmics, etc.... I want to combine hardcore with electronic and have pop hooks like MCR, and have a theme like Lady Gaga, and lyrics like Morrissey, and look like Craig Owens mixed with Brian Molko. But this is something I have to work on. I am far from ready.

I have so much I still need to improve about myself. I have finally fixed the internal conflict inside of me, so now I have to work on the external. My look needs a serious revamp.

The first thing is my body. I'm forcing myself to work out, no matter how painful it is. Yesterday I ran for about 15 minutes, then did a workout in my men's health book. I want to get my abs tight and smooth, because right now I have a small pudge. I think it's because I ate so much when I would smoke, and I didn't work out for a month. But now I am eating better and drinking protein shakes and working out again. I have all the right stuff; I just have not used it in awhile...

The other thing I need to work on is my hair. I fucked it up during the winter, so I had it cut razor short and have been letting it grow back out since January. Right now, my hair is to my eyes and the sides and back are about 2 inches. I have a plan for it, but it has to get longer.

Once I have the body and hair I want, I will feel even more confident. I am saving up some money to spend on new clothes, since my wardrobe is outdated. I spent $200 on new clothes over the weekend. I bought a dark green military style jacket with a fur hood from forever 21 (there is a men's department now in the mall), some rude fit skinny jeans from hot topic, and some skate shoes from kohls. I shopped online at interpunk and hot topic and bought A Day To Remember shirt that has snow white wrapped up by worms coming out of an apple, a MCR shirt with an eyeball on it that says galactic destroya, a Pierce the Veil shirt that says the band’s name in stitches, black thermals with Miss May I, Attack Attack, and Lady Gaga on each one, a black vest that has a furry hood on it, a grey Bennie with studs on the front, and matching fingerless gloves. I am going for a mix between hardcore and indie. I still have lots of clothes I can match with these new clothes, like my plaid button ups, and my skinny jeans, and my wide collection of hoodies and hats. But I am getting rid of outdated stuff.

By the summer, I should have everything going for me. If not, then I will keep working on myself. I'm always a work in progress anyway.

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samanthasroberts · 6 years

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16 People Dish Out The Dirty Details Of The ‘Best Sex They’ve Ever Had’

1. Overcuming challenges

I have a lot of insecurities when it comes to sex with guys. It’s something we’ve been working on our whole relationship. I’ve never been able to get out of my head.

But about 2 months ago, something just changed. I stayed the night, which wasn’t unusual, and we started kissing and touching each other. But this time it was just so sensual and intense. I don’t know what changed or where it came from.

He ate me out for a solid 20 minutes and by the end I was shaking uncontrollably. I sucked his dick until he came and I swallowed, which I haven’t done in a long time.

I got on top of him and rode his dick for the longest I ever have, I honestly lost track of time. I didn’t have to stop and rest, I just kept going and going. We were both drenched in sweat, making it much easier for me to grind on him.

I squirted for the first time when I was on top of him. I’ve since learned that it’s easy for me to recognize the angle that he needs to hit for me to squirt, but I can never distinguish when it’s actually happening. I honestly don’t know how many times I squirted but it was everywhere.

He pushed me off and laid me down, pulling my legs over his head. He fucked me hard for a few minutes and I squirted more- I don’t know how many times still. We couldn’t sleep on the bed that night and it was still wet when we woke up early the next afternoon.

Our sex life has vastly improved since that night, but I’ve still never squirted that many times or that much again.

2. It was enthusiastic!!!

Enthusiasm. I once hooked up with a girl who had it in spades.

When I replay that night over in my head there’s not really anything physical about her or the sex that stands out.

But, my god. This woman was enthusiastic.

She made me feel like a God damn porn star.

From the moment when she got my pants off and said “oh wow” to later when she was saying shit like “your cock is so deep inside me.”

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t consider myself to be anywhere near a sexual God our anything, but this girl sure made me feel that way.

3. Making it fun

had a short term relationship with a girl I met through some mutual friends. My girlfriend at the time approved of me having sex on the side for a little fun while she was out of the country.

This girl just had an INSANE amount of fun doing everything. She actually acted like she was not only enjoying it, but having FUN every moment of everything that was happening. She was riding me like I was a swingset, smiling the whole time. We told jokes to each other. When we were done, we talked about fun times we’d had and sex with other people. Then we fucked again.

Three weeks.

After that we moved to different states and remained great friends over Facebook. When I met her new boyfriend, we all joked about how loud she was in bed.

That was as close as I’ve ever been to a poly relationship. Being with a girl who really showed that she not only enjoyed the sex but was also having FUN was awesome.

4. It was the acid…

On the edge of a bluff that skirted a closed golf course in whangarei, New Zealand. On acid. It happened because we got turned on by the waves, crashing into the rocks below. It was a night with a full moon, and the water seemed to be made of black latex. The waves would rhythmically slam into the hard, black granite. Making a sucking, slurping sound as it drew back, leaving gentle frothy licks before suddenly plunging into the rocks for more. We simultaneously decided that we needed to fuck. Immediately. I pulled her pants off and ate her for a while, before slowly entering. It was definitely the acid… but that night, I felt like I finally understood her vagina. I could feel gestures and contractions that seemed to happen almost autonomously. We’ve been having sex for over a year and a half, but this time I felt like I was really getting to know its texture and personality. At one point, it felt like our respective parts had blended, and we were stirring a mystic soup.

Tldr: outdoor sex, foreign country, amazing acid trip and super sexy water.

5. Kill my nipples

I was lazing in bed one Sunday morning with my SO. We’re lightly fooling around and chatting about sex. I love nipple stimulation and mention how I liked them squeezed really hard. We get an idea and he nips downstairs to the kitchen and he comes back with two different types of clothes pegs. We try the wooden ones first but they hurt too much, the plastic ones still cause intense pain but I can just about take it. We’re lying next to each other and im feeling pretty good about being able to take it when I notice that I’m insanely turned on, I mention this to him and he slips his hand down there to check for wetness. I’m soaked!

He immediately gets the hardest boner ever. Feels like I can barely get my hand around it. He tries to finger me but I can’t wait. I throw him on the bed and jump on his magnificent cock. I cum almost immediately, really hard. Hard enough to push him out of me but I’m on top so I use my bodyweight to keep him in. I can feel my pussy contracting around him, he has this huge grin on his face. Almost as soon as I finish orgasming I’m aware of the clamping pain on my nipples, it sets me off again so I fuck him a bit more. It takes virtually nothing before I cum again. Over and over I repeat this cycle, I cum five times in five minutes. It’s insane, my body has become some kind of orgasm machine. I can’t take any more and ask him to take the pegs off me. Bloody hell that hurts!

I lay down to recover while he massages my poor abused titties with this dopey ear to ear grin on his face. I needed a bit of time to compose myself but then fair’s fair I suck him off until he cums (it doesn’t take long, he was so turned on). Afterwards we lay in each other’s arms wallowing in our love for each other.

6. Choke me

My girl came over with all intentions of just passing out all night. (She was working a very shitty job at the time) So she gets there and we cuddle and go to sleep, next thing I know she’s waking me up at 4 am because she’s horny.

Things get hot and heavy and we get a little rough like normal, and then out of nowhere she grabs my neck and starts squeezing and at first I freak out, but then I realize I love it, and we keep going till we both finish at the same time. And then proceed to pass out and sleep till 1 pm.

7.Fuck me in the window!

For Valentine’s Day two years ago, my SO and I decided to rent a hotel room for a day-long sex marathon. We went crazy that day, just fucking on every surface of the room. The highlight though was him tying me spread-eagle on top of one of the tables in my school girl outfit I wore for him, and opening the curtains of the room so I could be “exposed” to the high rise office building that was across from the hotel. That element of exhibitionism while he fucked me raw was absolutely amazing. It was also the first time we tried some more intense BDSM stuff like choking and gagging me with my panties. It was so incredibly amazing, and now we’ve made it a tradition to spend Valentine’s Day at a hotel every year.

8. Sex in the rain (or after it anyway)

A friend and I were spending a lot of time together one summer- cute dates (picnics, going to the zoo, movies, dinner, you name it), late nights, and long talks… we had kissed, and were rarely found not holding hands or walking arm-in-arm. One night we were at my place, watching a movie and it started to pour- an immediate torrential downpour.

She turns to me, kisses my cheek and whispers in my ear “let’s go outside”, gets up and gently tugs at my hand, pulling me outside. We run around in the rain, barefoot and soaked- after a couple of minutes, we decide we’re too cold and have to go back inside, but we stop in front of the walkway and kiss for a good long while before going inside.

Inside, we’re both sopping wet- soaked through to the bone. I suggest we change into something dry, and she coyly replies “why not just get out of it?” so… we do- our clothes left by the door, she wraps herself around me and I walk us up to my bedroom where we proceed to have the most amazing, loud, passionate sex until the sun comes up.

Afterwards, my back was positively covered in scratch marks, and we both had hickeys everywhere. We ended up going over to a friend’s house that night to swim and then drink outrageously, and we had the same sex again that night- practically the whole week was spent relaxing and going out during the day and then wildly screwing each other at night.

9. Sex on the sofa bed

Mine was very recently with my SO.

I had my fair share of partners during college etc but the first time my SO and I slept together he immediately shot to the number one spot.

So he was away for a wedding, when he got back he had a friend staying with him, his friend was sleeping in his bed, he and I were on his sofa-bed.

We were cuddling and he was buzzed and not really sleepy. He asked if I wanted to spoon I said sure, he pressed his hard cock right up on my ass. I started grinding against it. He said he didn’t want to have sex in case his friend heard us so I started licking his cock instead. He stopped me and started teasing my tits.

Usually I like kinda rough stimulation, biting my nipples HARD, but this time he just went so slowly and so gently, it drove me crazy!! After maybe 10-15 mins of having my tits teased like that I couldn’t take it anymore.

I begged him to fuck me and he obliged. As we weren’t on a proper bed or anything we could only really do missionary but it was intense and so loving and just… Wow!!

10. I came inside her and it was insane

The best sex I ever had…

It was in college with a FWB. She came over to fuck like she normally does. Making out, I went to the drawer to pull out a condom but forgot we used the last condom the last time we fucked. I told her I didn’t have a condom.

We continued making out (her on top) while she grinded her pussy on my cock. At some point, she sank down on it. We fucked for a LONG time! Against the wall. Bent her over the bed. Bent her over the desk. Missionary. In the window. Everywhere. Back to the bed with her on top I was ready to cum. I told her I was going to cum. She started riding me harder. I said again I was going to cum. She started long stroking my cock – lifting up until just the head was in her pussy then sinking down. I went to grab her hips to get her off me. She grabbed my wrists and pinned them to the sides of my head while she rode my cock. I came HARD in her pussy! It was the first time I ever came inside a woman before. It was the greatest orgasm I had to that date.

I’ve had some good ones, but this one I will remember forever.

11. “Tell me the alphabet backwards…”

Leaving the bar one night, I bump into a vague acquaintance, and a friend of theirs whom I & everyone I was with didn’t know. She very strongly resembled a brunette Scarlett Johansen. We all briefly exchanged formalities, trying to be on our ways after a long night out.

The unknown, buxom, sexy brunette and I, however, had instantly locked eyes, and walking & talking on the way to the parking garage, I’m subtly flirting but am not pressed either way because I was tired, but she says to me with a smile “you look like you’d be a great kisser”.

Immediately I’m turned on because a woman taking the initiative, in any way, is one of the most dead-sexy things imaginable. We kiss slowly & passionately, instant kissing chemistry. She says “yeah… I’m coming home with you tonight”. Away we go in my car.

Get back to my place, tear off our clothes, all while hot kissing and my hands roaming her amazing naked figure. Perfect tits, ass, and hips, just simply perfect. The type of girl whose body doesn’t lie through her clothes.

So, the 2 hottest things that made this 1 (of 2) best sexual encounters in my life so far:

We’re making out, hot naked bodies pressed together while standing, and she drops to her knees and slowly starts going down on me (I LOVE standing BJs), and she is wonderful & passionate about it, but pauses a moment and looks up at me.

“Start saying the alphabet backwards, like I’m a cop giving you a field test, or I stop”.

Holy shit, I could barely think, and letters started pouring out my mouth in a blur, every so often hearing her moan/say: “Mhm mhhmmm” (as in “no, you messed up”), and she would lightly pull away from me, as my scrambled brain begged for blood from my throbbing cock in order to formulate the next proper letters to keep her going at it.

Amazing. Which led to:

We move to the bed and she subtly, almost without me even realizing, again takes initiative to maneuver herself on top of me. Watching her gorgeous, large breasts heave, as I gently caressed her body & breasts, as she buried her gorgeous hips down onto me…

Slowly sliding & grinding her pussy all over me, and then slipping me inside of her, and riding me like an animal. Like any guy, I love a girl on top. This is one of the sexiest views imaginable, and I was lost in the euphoria. Watching her slowly thrust away, with my hands on her tits, then one on her belly with my thumb gently rubbing her clit with every thrust… watching her arch back every few humps, and her head thrown back or to the side every so often, with her mouth open in a silent gasps.

Then she started trying to talk, like typical sex stuff “you feel so good”, “it’s amazing”, etc, but almost immediately, she becomes mostly incomprehensible and I have the hugest shit-eating grin on my face as this girl rides me and literally starts speaking in tongues, half-sentences, and half-words… and then feeling her pussy quiver on my cock as she collapsed on me and we kissed.

Un-fucking-believable. I rolled her over and finished myself off, but that was just mindless fucking at that point. She herself, was amazing. Laying there in the after-sex musky, calm, haze, she says “that was amazing, when I was on top of you it was like a mini-orgasm with each thrust, you have a perfect cock”… sooo fucking hot to hear something like that. I mentioned she was talking while on top, but she claimed she had no recollection of trying to say anything. Unreal. Best one-night-stand ever. Luckily it happened a few more times.

12. Hammock Sex

My first real/serious girlfriend, we had been dating on and off for like a year and a half. We had very similar libidos and interests back then, and she liked to do it whenever we had the chance. One night, I snuck over to her house (we were both about 16 at the time, so this was a big deal.) So I worked my way over there, and she was camping out in the back yard, and they had a hammock.

I started on top but that didn’t really work out, so then she got on top and holy hell. The next 45 minutes were THE most intense minutes of sex. She just got a rhythm that perfectly rolled with the bouncing of the hammock and it was crazy. I recommend a hammock to anyone for this reason.

13. Threesome led to better twosome

I had my first threesome one night (me, SO, and friend), up until the wee hours of the morning at the friend’s place.That was awesome and mind opening and beautiful but it’s not my best. My best time was the morning after the threesome when my SO and I were alone again: it was just missionary but it was so incredibly passionate and urgent and connected that it blew my mind even more than the amazing threesome.

It was like some new, deeper connection had been made between us after that night and manifested itself as mind-exploding sex.

14. “Ran my pussy like he owned it.”

My lover and I have the best sex I have ever had, consistently. The best was the most recent.

He just ran my pussy like he owns it. Double penetrating my pussy with toys, sucking my clit multiple times. He knows I like it kinky and rough and pulled out all the stops. I have bruises all over my body and my muscles hurt (this was on Wednesday. He fisted me while using a Hitachi on me. He took pictures of me. He fucked me with my panties. As in stuffed them inside me. By the end of the night, I was in ecstasy & just begging him to fill me up and use my pussy. Absolutely mind blowing.

15. Totally dominated, totally turned on

When I was 16 I was at a house with a circle of fracquaintances. Of all the people there, I knew him the least; we had had a few conversations previous, but nothing indicated that he was into me, so to speak.

There was a general “keep up” drinking contest in which I was of course participating, so by my 4th beer inside of an hour and a half (I was about 5’2″, 130lbs. at the time), I was drunk but not too drunk. More like at that wonderfully happy, invincible stage.

I had gone downstairs for a smoke and was climbing a set of stairs to the side room where we were chilling, and he was coming down. We met about halfway, stopped, and just looked at each other.

I said hi.

He said hi.

He slams me into the wall and begins kissing me, forcefully, without any of the sloppy drunkenness or inexperience I had come to expect from my peer group (although he has 3 years on me, so that helped). We run to his room and the door slams behind me. I say something like, “You know I’m not just going to have sex with you,” and he responds with something like, “Oh I know,” and then I’m up against the wall again, wrapping my legs around him (he’s only slightly taller than me and very muscular so we had great angles for all of this), then he threw me on the bed, went down on me while wrapped around my legs so I couldn’t escape, even after I had already cum twice and was kicking like crazy. I sucked his dick to a hardness heretofore unknown to humankind. Then we fucked in multiple positions for the next hour. We were interrupted at some point by people just walking in, but continued regardless, like the troopers we are.

This particular session was my first indication that I wanted to be dominated in bed, that the last thing I wanted was someone tenderly stroking my hair and asking me if I’m okay every 5 seconds. This was hot and spontaneous and just fucking brilliant.

16. “My moans were a treasure map for her to follow.”

One night my friend and his girlfriend ask me to go bowling one night, I decide to get out of the apartment, and they invited a friend along. It was a friend of the girlfriend’s who wanted to get out of the house too, she was someone I had met I think briefly once before, but only in passing. We all went bowling, and throughout the night I kept finding myself checking out the girl’s ass when she went up there. When she’d come back I’d kinda half assed put my arm on the back of the chair kinda around her but only lightly flirted.

Fast forward to the end of bowling, we all decide to come back to my apartment to watch a movie, my friend and his girlfriend are on one end of the couch, and me and the girl were kinda near the other (not cuddling, or anything). About 20 minutes into the movie I decide what the hell and put my hand on her upper thigh, to which she covers with her hand. At this point there’s insane sparks. About 5 minutes pass and then I just turn to her, she turns to me, and we start making out like teenagers. My friend didn’t notice really, and his girlfriend was all but asleep in his lap. I whispered to the girl “want to move this to my bedroom” to which she stands up and walks right to.

I follow her with about a 5 second lag time, and when I get to the bedroom she’s already laying on her back with her pants off. She asks if I have a condom and it’s on. This girl was the most enthusiastic woman I’ve ever experienced in bed, I was throwing her into all different positions, and she was squealing with delight in every one. What made it extra special is that she was the first girl I had ever been with that had her pubic hair completely waxed, which made going down on her the most pleasurable time I’ve ever had doing that for someone.

Then we turn the tables and she decides to go down on me, which typically isn’t the easiest thing to get me off from, however she was AMAZING, my moans seemed to be a treasure map for her to follow, as she always took my breathing and grunts as cues to what was good, and what was amazing! Then it came time for me to come, at which point I informed her of this (because I had never been with a girl that swallowed before and that’s common courtesy), to my surprise, she doubled her efforts and made me come harder than I had ever come before right into her mouth which she promptly swallowed with pride.

I was astonished at this whole series of events. However while we had been going at it for a good 30-45 minutes including foreplay and penetration, she hadn’t come yet (which she seemed to be ok with). I then asked her if she’s able to come while masturbating, and she said yes. So I grabbed her hand and guided it down to her still wet slit and started helping her rub it slowly, once she started getting a rhythm going I started to also masturbate with her in sync, while also kissing her all over, caressing her magnificent breasts, and occasionally helping her rubbing. After about 5 minutes, we both came with a powerful orgasm at the same time. She turned to me and said “that was fucking hot!”. After that both of us just laid there coming down from some of the most unexpected, statically charged sex.

After that night I found out that my friend and his girlfriend had been hearing the girl’s moaning and noises, and felt pretty uncomfortable so they left. To this day, that was the hottest, and best sex of my life. And the sad part is after that night, we never saw each other again (although we’re still friends on Facebook).

Source: http://allofbeer.com/16-people-dish-out-the-dirty-details-of-the-best-sex-theyve-ever-had/

from All of Beer https://allofbeer.wordpress.com/2018/05/04/16-people-dish-out-the-dirty-details-of-the-best-sex-theyve-ever-had/

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adambstingus · 6 years

Text

16 People Dish Out The Dirty Details Of The ‘Best Sex They’ve Ever Had’

1. Overcuming challenges

I have a lot of insecurities when it comes to sex with guys. It’s something we’ve been working on our whole relationship. I’ve never been able to get out of my head.

He ate me out for a solid 20 minutes and by the end I was shaking uncontrollably. I sucked his dick until he came and I swallowed, which I haven’t done in a long time.

Our sex life has vastly improved since that night, but I’ve still never squirted that many times or that much again.

2. It was enthusiastic!!!

Enthusiasm. I once hooked up with a girl who had it in spades.

When I replay that night over in my head there’s not really anything physical about her or the sex that stands out.

But, my god. This woman was enthusiastic.

She made me feel like a God damn porn star.

From the moment when she got my pants off and said “oh wow” to later when she was saying shit like “your cock is so deep inside me.”

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t consider myself to be anywhere near a sexual God our anything, but this girl sure made me feel that way.

3. Making it fun

had a short term relationship with a girl I met through some mutual friends. My girlfriend at the time approved of me having sex on the side for a little fun while she was out of the country.

Three weeks.

After that we moved to different states and remained great friends over Facebook. When I met her new boyfriend, we all joked about how loud she was in bed.

That was as close as I’ve ever been to a poly relationship. Being with a girl who really showed that she not only enjoyed the sex but was also having FUN was awesome.

4. It was the acid…

Tldr: outdoor sex, foreign country, amazing acid trip and super sexy water.

5. Kill my nipples

6. Choke me

7.Fuck me in the window!

8. Sex in the rain (or after it anyway)

9. Sex on the sofa bed

Mine was very recently with my SO.

I had my fair share of partners during college etc but the first time my SO and I slept together he immediately shot to the number one spot.

So he was away for a wedding, when he got back he had a friend staying with him, his friend was sleeping in his bed, he and I were on his sofa-bed.

I begged him to fuck me and he obliged. As we weren’t on a proper bed or anything we could only really do missionary but it was intense and so loving and just… Wow!!

10. I came inside her and it was insane

The best sex I ever had…

I’ve had some good ones, but this one I will remember forever.

11. “Tell me the alphabet backwards…”

So, the 2 hottest things that made this 1 (of 2) best sexual encounters in my life so far:

“Start saying the alphabet backwards, like I’m a cop giving you a field test, or I stop”.

Amazing. Which led to:

12. Hammock Sex

13. Threesome led to better twosome

It was like some new, deeper connection had been made between us after that night and manifested itself as mind-exploding sex.

14. “Ran my pussy like he owned it.”

My lover and I have the best sex I have ever had, consistently. The best was the most recent.

15. Totally dominated, totally turned on

I had gone downstairs for a smoke and was climbing a set of stairs to the side room where we were chilling, and he was coming down. We met about halfway, stopped, and just looked at each other.

I said hi.

He said hi.

16. “My moans were a treasure map for her to follow.”

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/16-people-dish-out-the-dirty-details-of-the-best-sex-theyve-ever-had/ from All of Beer https://allofbeercom.tumblr.com/post/173568689947

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allofbeercom · 6 years

Text

16 People Dish Out The Dirty Details Of The ‘Best Sex They’ve Ever Had’

1. Overcuming challenges

I have a lot of insecurities when it comes to sex with guys. It’s something we’ve been working on our whole relationship. I’ve never been able to get out of my head.

He ate me out for a solid 20 minutes and by the end I was shaking uncontrollably. I sucked his dick until he came and I swallowed, which I haven’t done in a long time.

Our sex life has vastly improved since that night, but I’ve still never squirted that many times or that much again.

2. It was enthusiastic!!!

Enthusiasm. I once hooked up with a girl who had it in spades.

When I replay that night over in my head there’s not really anything physical about her or the sex that stands out.

But, my god. This woman was enthusiastic.

She made me feel like a God damn porn star.

From the moment when she got my pants off and said “oh wow” to later when she was saying shit like “your cock is so deep inside me.”

Don’t get me wrong, I don’t consider myself to be anywhere near a sexual God our anything, but this girl sure made me feel that way.

3. Making it fun

had a short term relationship with a girl I met through some mutual friends. My girlfriend at the time approved of me having sex on the side for a little fun while she was out of the country.

Three weeks.

After that we moved to different states and remained great friends over Facebook. When I met her new boyfriend, we all joked about how loud she was in bed.

That was as close as I’ve ever been to a poly relationship. Being with a girl who really showed that she not only enjoyed the sex but was also having FUN was awesome.

4. It was the acid…

Tldr: outdoor sex, foreign country, amazing acid trip and super sexy water.

5. Kill my nipples

6. Choke me

7.Fuck me in the window!

8. Sex in the rain (or after it anyway)

9. Sex on the sofa bed

Mine was very recently with my SO.

I had my fair share of partners during college etc but the first time my SO and I slept together he immediately shot to the number one spot.

So he was away for a wedding, when he got back he had a friend staying with him, his friend was sleeping in his bed, he and I were on his sofa-bed.

I begged him to fuck me and he obliged. As we weren’t on a proper bed or anything we could only really do missionary but it was intense and so loving and just… Wow!!

10. I came inside her and it was insane

The best sex I ever had…

I’ve had some good ones, but this one I will remember forever.

11. “Tell me the alphabet backwards…”

So, the 2 hottest things that made this 1 (of 2) best sexual encounters in my life so far:

“Start saying the alphabet backwards, like I’m a cop giving you a field test, or I stop”.

Amazing. Which led to:

12. Hammock Sex

13. Threesome led to better twosome

It was like some new, deeper connection had been made between us after that night and manifested itself as mind-exploding sex.

14. “Ran my pussy like he owned it.”

My lover and I have the best sex I have ever had, consistently. The best was the most recent.

15. Totally dominated, totally turned on

I had gone downstairs for a smoke and was climbing a set of stairs to the side room where we were chilling, and he was coming down. We met about halfway, stopped, and just looked at each other.

I said hi.

He said hi.

16. “My moans were a treasure map for her to follow.”

from All Of Beer http://allofbeer.com/16-people-dish-out-the-dirty-details-of-the-best-sex-theyve-ever-had/

0 notes