#i need to like not write so much for him

[ricciardosgirl]

" just friends. "

tw ; smut , smut and more smut.

situationship , rough sex.

————————————————————————

you were friends , until he had you bent over some random dorm room sink. you were friends until he fucked you. you were friends. just friends. nothing more — nothing less.

passing glances , agony fills your system each time he pretended to not know you. fallacious hope after every night he ravaged you. you'd be lying in his dorm room. he's sat on his windowsill , cigarette in mouth as he ignores you . . waiting for you to just leave.

you'd hesitate , eyes wandering around his crowded messy room — taking a moment to breathe. " round two or are you leaving ? " he'd ask coldly , not even turning around to face you. he already knew the answer , you always stayed.

he'd only talk to you in private , and even then the conversation barely lasted — the only thing it seemed that the two of you had in common was love for the art of fucking. it had been a common dance between you two , varying from time to time.

sometimes , he'd be sweet. you'd almost think he's making love to you , but he's just doing this to make you stay. other times , most times , he'd fuck you so hard to where you could barely move afterwards.

" yeah , you like my cock ? say it. " he'd spit on your face , large hands grasping at your throat just right. you gargled out something , but that wasn't good enough. " say it. " he would slap the soft flesh of your ass.

once , only once , he papered you. on your birthday of all things. it was the only time that you ever felt like he gave a fuck about you. he laid on near the edge of your bed , mouth covering your soft sensitive bud. his face already soaking wet and practically dripping onto the sheets as he edged you closer and closer to your release.

that was a good day , a long time ago however. you still think about it.

maybe you aren't friends , maybe this is more than that , maybe it isn't. you saw him take orher girls into a party bathroom or his dorm , it bothered you. and it bothered him because it wasn't you.

" such a fucking whore for me. " face squished into the mirror , farleigh's hands cupped your cheek - his thumb in your mouth. he was driving himself so deep into you . . all you could do was sit there and take it.

" need a cig ? "

he asked , eyes stare over at your semi - covered figure. this was the first time he'd ever said anything different. the first time he actually offered something. " sure. " you came over , joining him on his windowsill after a long night of intense fucking.

you expected something good , something worth coming over for. you lit the cigarette , taking a long drag before he spoke.

" we should stop. " cold , your heart stung. " why ? " he should have at least some integrity . . he should tell you. but instead , he stayed silent.

you walked away that night , tears streaming down your face pathetically.

so much for friends.

#saltburn #farleigh start #smut #i heart saltburn #i cannot get him out of my head #fanfic #oops i did it again #i need to like not write so much for him

[stoopidstapler]

SO IVE BEEN GOIN INSANE SINCE THIS TRAILER DROPPED. JUST. SIMON. SIMON. SIMON.

#simon petrikov #fionna and cake #adventure time #goin insane over him #thers no words to describe how im feelin #i wish i could draw somehtin better but i am goin INSANE #FINALLY. AFTER ALL THESE YEARS. we are being FED. #ALSO?? HOW THEY SHOWED HIM EXACTLY WHEN THE LYRICS GO ''WHATS WRONG WITH ME'. LIKE HELLO??????? #ive seen so many good theories PLEASE GOD WRITE FICS I AM BEGGIN I LL DRAW U FANART BLS HEL P #IDK WOT IM GONNA DO FOR A WHOLE MONTH #SOMEONE KNOCK ME OUT TIL THE 31ST. HIBERNATE ME. HELP. #also i need to put it out there the first thing i thought when i saw this trailer was simon is tryina rewrite fionna and cake #which is why their world keeps changin so much? idk idk #ive seen so many different ideas and they are all so good please help #ALSO GOD. THIS MAN IS JUST GOIN THRU IT. AND ITS ONLY BEEN A QUICK TRAILER. #im sorry for so many tags idk where to put these help #maybe i should make an actual blog for like. whatever. n reblogs. help.

[mitathemita]

the shining sun!! ☀️

#yippie !!! #im mostly doing these for practice but they are so fun like? lookit him hehe #i must do moon next! my boy!! #also!! if you have any pictures of their models…. i would very much like to borrow them please #for reference #i have like. over 80 rn but… i need MORE #anyway!! #fnaf #my art #mita doodles #fnaf sb #fnaf help wanted 2 #fnaf daycare attendant #fnaf dca #fnaf sun #sundrop #as i was writing these tags i got my acceptance letter email?? (hooray)

[bread-that-draws]

Flowey’s so funny and has me so fucked up like he’s a talking flower. He tries to kill you upon your first interaction. He is ten years old. He is damaged beyond repair. He’s a flower named Flowey. He’s become friends with every single character. He’s killed all of them countless times. He knows everything about everyone. He doesn’t care anymore. He takes care of his mom when she can’t take care of herself. He’s killed her before. He doesn’t care if you kill her. He thinks she’s trying to replace him. He just wants to be himself again. He wants to destroy everything. He hates you. You’re the only one who understands him. He wants his best friend back. He’s terrified of them. He believes in kill or be killed because he died by giving mercy to the wrong person. He believes himself to be the wrong person. He doesn’t understand when you show him that kindness he showed others, even when you know he could kill you for it. He’s tried every route. He asks you if you have anything better to do when you try to do the same. He’s a direct reflection of the player. He’s a fucking talking flower named flowey and his only voice line is by Ronald McDonald and his officially licensed plush does a little dance for you

#‘Flowey would listen to i bet on losing dogs by Mitski and cry until he throws up and Chara calls him cringe from beyond the grave’ #-me to my friend when I ranted about this last night #he has me so fucked up like oh my god #how is the best character a fucking talking flower #I love undertale’s writing so much like it’s mastered minimal evidence giving away the biggest parts of characters #i can analyze him i can study him under a microscope #i can put him in a terrarium with a sticky note that says gay baby jail you know #he has me SO fucked up #flowey #flowey the flower #asriel #asriel dreemurr #I’m talking about flowey btw not asriel i know they’re the same person but not to me #like how i consider little baby me and fucked up 13 year old me different people #asriel sits on the playground and cries when nobody wants to play warrior cats with him #and flowey sits in the back of classrooms and answers ‘life is MEANINGLESS’ to every question #not speaking from experience ofc (im lying) #love my edgy flower *puts a magnifying glass up to him and notes how fucked up he is* #i think more characters need to be fucked up beyond repair #undertale #utdr #character analysis

[vampireposter]

meeting wyll at the grove, as someone who the tieflings trust enough to train their children, says so much about him. it's so sad that he doesn't get explored in acts 2-3 as deeply as the other companions, when his problems are equally intense. the average player probably long rests once before coming across the grove, but even if not, in that time wyll has already proven to the tieflings that they can rely on the Blade of Frontiers.

this is the immediate first thing he chooses to do after being condemned to slow death via ceremorphosis. his priority list in the first conversations with tav is: 1) hunt down a dangerous devil, 2) help zevlor with the goblins, 3) once nothing threatens the tieflings he will gladly search for a tadpole cure. wyll is perpetually his own last priority, and i wonder if it has to do with the lore about souls.

if he believes mind flayers' souls have been destroyed, and fiend warlocks will all have their souls sent to the hells after death, then becoming a mind flayer isn't the worst possible way for him to die. he would never become a mindless monster to save his own soul, but he's not gripped by horror the way that some of the other origin characters are. lae'zel has been made revoltingly impure to her people, astarion is terrified of losing the scrap of bodily autonomy he just regained, gale is guilt-ridden over the orb detonation if he dies, shadowheart has to survive to prove herself to her cult leader, and karlach has also just regained bodily autonomy and is desparate to live.

this is just another quest for the Blade, whose persona guards wyll ravengard against the vice of self-concern when he ought to be concerned for those in need.

#wyll ravengard #bg3 #writing a wyll pov thing in order to roleplay harder in my durge playthrough & ive become obsessed w him #i love him so much. he doesnt even really get to realize in-game how traumatized he is and in act 3 he has not healed any really #come here wyll we are going to learn about self care. you & durge need to overcome the desire to give up your lives for your fathers ideals #faerun doesnt have LMHCs so wyll gets my durge who currently thinks he is (a miserable failure of) a cleric of ilmater. #this fic is practice for my 'ascended tavastarion struggle to quit being Like That' character study thing wherein i am struggling w dialogu #loving working on both. im in my little dollhouse making my toys try out lines until they fit #vampireposted

[emo-batboy]

A Wild Battinson (Social Media AU)

Part 43 (Masterlist)

(Part 44)

Me, to myself: I just think the series was better when I posted several times a week because the pacing felt more natural, and it translates better when people binge it.

Also Me, holding two jobs and a bat: If you try to post once a day again, I will disconnect your head from your shoulders—

@bruciemilf guess who’s back

Anyways, folks! :D So I'm thinking of a new upload schedule where I spend a bit preparing the next ten or so parts then post it all in two weeks? I think that would be fun (and much better for my creative process.)

I’ll be posting the next part very soon :) But it's going to be drastically different from what I've done before. Let’s see if anyone can guess why.

Yada yada don’t die LOVE Y’ALL

#also since I posted so much more I felt less guilty putting filler stuff in because you'd get more tomorrow #but NOW that feels like cheating because you waited a whole week (or three months whoopsie) even though when I look back at the older parts #-the filler bits were always the best #also the lore is just exhausting sometimes #I'm not writing the MCU here I need to calm down #I'm literally rereading my own series five times trying to think of more cute filler because that's CLEARLY what I'm missing #and pictures of him #I'm running out of pictures of Robert Pattinson it's finally happening #pray for me #a wild battinson #battinson #bruce wayne #batman #the batman 2022 #batman 2022 #the batman #dc universe #dc #battinson needs a hug #gotham #soft bruce wayne #gotham city #only in gotham #gothamite #social media au #social media

[canisalbus]

hello! i've written a short little machete fic, and i wanted to share it with you as thanks for all the incredible art and generous question-answering you've been doing these last few months. i hope that if you give it a look, you enjoy it. <3 keep up all your amazing work! archiveofourown [.] org / works / 50945128

✦ A Voi ✦

#wake up honey new fic dropped #feeling blessed #eating this out of your hands like a baby deer #it's so good you guys treat my lads so well #and write so beautifully and vividly and eloquently #I rambled about this in length in the fic's comment section so I won't repeat myself too much here #but in this one Machete has a little breakdown and gets lovingly bathed like the sad and stunned dog he is #really captured his neuroticism and endless uneasiness #excellent Vittorio content augh I adore him #I'll definitely come back to this later and draw proper actual fanart because some of the scenes are so thematically and visually strong #I need to be able to see them with my actual eyes #dangit I forgot the cut on his lip #had a minor crisis over the color of Machete's robe but maybe it'd be white like the rest of his sleepwear #as a contrast to the usual blacks and reds #fic A Voi #doomcountry #own art #own characters #Machete #CanisAlbus #blood #I said this before and I say it again #if you read the thing and like it it would be very kind and appreciated if you left a small comment to doomcountry as a thank you #you don't need an ao3 account and you can do it anonymously

[ninjasmudge]

When Macaque can take his relationship with Sun Wukong falling apart better than Megatron does with Optimus.

why cant you be more like macaque, he just beat some people up and put on plays until he felt better

anyway enjoy this niche crossover

#lego monkie kid #monkie kid #six eared macaque #transformers #megatron #tfp megatron #tfp #tf #mk #mk art #transformers prime #i was gonna draw maq and then i was like wait them robots is huge #and then i brainwaved so smoke monster macaque it is #if you asked me about whose fault the transformers wars are in general i could write you a multiple page essay #i could talk for hours and hours about different continueties blaming different things and how the war fell on both autobots and decepticon #but in tfp megs is pretty assuredly largely at fault and simply unable to entertain the idea of peace #i vow not to get into that essay here but his motivations were coming from a different place than for eg. tfa where hes much more justified #tfp was assured destruction #plus its for the joke so thats why im placing blame on him here #the joke needed it #sometimes salf care is obliterating your whole species #my art

[p4nishers]

what i absolutely adore about mobius is that he never stops being kind. EVER. he has gone through so much and no matter what happens he always chooses kindness over anything else. we've seen him comfort strangers countless times without hesitation because he's just THAT good and he would never turn away from anyone in distress. even when he's clearly upset he's still kind enough to explain to victor what he's drinking and not even be annoyed at his constant interrupting but just say "hold on a second" in a gentle tone then focus on him again DESPITE EVERYTHING GOING ON to get him hot chocolate bc why wouldn't he do so? he doesn't question these actions because they come naturally to him, kindness is in his nature. why shouldn't he try to lighten the mood and be kind while they wait for their end? why shouldn't he reassure and comfort everyone around him while he's actively falling apart? these aren't questions for him bc he's at his core the kindest person in the show and he will always ALWAYS have time and space to be kind. god.

#i need to be sedated i love him so much #gritting my teeth thru liking sylvie rn bc it was genuinely so fucking unnecessary for her to shout at him like she's literally just there #to cause conflict i fucking hate it just admit u cant write main woman presenting characters and move on jfc #anyway no wonder loki is so drawn to mobius and his kindess after all the cruelty he went thru #mobius m mobius #loki spoilers #loki season 2 #loki series #lokius #loki #loki laufeyson

[chaoticwhoknows]

do you guys ever think about jamie tartt and sam obisanya bc i do. constantly. they take up so much room in my brain. going from “no one in my entire career had made me feel worse about myself than jamie did” to sam and jamie being comfortable enough to constantly tease each other like siblings and swarm each other during goal celebrations and SAM being one of the first people (along with roy) who we see being concerned about jamie in mom city. JAMIE WEARING SAM’S NUMBER WHEN HE PLAYED FOR ENGLAND. season 3 jamie and sam are so… just so… they’re soooooooo!!! and season 2 jamie and sam are like hey what if i reached out to you through a series of seemingly small gestures in very vulnerable moments of yours bc i don’t know how to properly show that i care about you given the history between us until eventually we were just completely in sync with each other? what then?

and don’t even get me started on the parallels between them. ladies and gentlemen THE PARALLELS. the JUXTAPOSITIONS. the OTHER WORDS. their relationships with their fathers alone is so much to unpack. them cutting to JAMIE’S reaction when ola walked in and hugged sam in the locker room separately from the reaction of the rest of the team. the creators knew what they were doing with that

#i think about sam holding back another player (i think dixon?) during The Hug at Wembley so much #bc that’s sam saying ‘jamie needs roy and not me or you so we need to give jamie space’ #AND him saying ‘idk what jamie needs rn bc we aren’t There yet but ik he doesn’t need This’ #like there’s care in there and there’s an inability to express it #and jamie with the dubai air protest don’t get me STARTED. #like he doesn’t make a gracious statement he’s just like ‘hey pass the tape we all need to wear the same kit’ #like ‘i don’t understand what exactly you’re going through but i care about u and want to support you’ #when i write the sam-jamie scene to the addressing jamie’s dad fic… #i think then i will heal of all that ails me truly #microdosing on writing the sam jamie fic by writing this #jamie tartt #sam obisanya #i need to rewatch s2 just to pick them apart #ted lasso

[a2zillustration]

I carried this thing for MONTHS with the EXPRESS PURPOSE of putting Raphael in it (knowing full well Larian wouldn't let me do that, mechanically) and I had one major miscalculation.

| First | | Previous | | Next |

[[ All Croissant Adventures (chronological, desktop) ]]

[[ All Croissant Adventures (app) ]]

#Ok I'm gonna ramble in the tags about all this get ready: #I KNEW Larian wouldn't let me actually pull this off but I PROMISE you that stupid flask sat in my inventory since the moment I grabbed it #WAITING for when I could write this little bit about putting Raphael in it #I even threw it at him in the fight with a 30% hit chance and it succeeded so I considered that Larian giving me permission to say it workd #But as I was reading up on it again when I was sketching this I saw the bit about native planes and I cried LMAO. But it's dnd- #so I rewrote is as it would've happened in a game. U kno. #Also I have been waiting to use that fox line for SO LONG bc of Croissant's dad being a fox-like fey creature #So much backstory that's slotted in PERFECTLY with the BG3 narrative #Anyway absolutely wild that we managed to take out this ancient powerful devil - and on the first try! #Lae'zel with a potion of speed did WORK. Gale came in clutch with hold monster. Astarion gave Raph stage fright. Croissant made him dance #(I'm pretty sure he just doesn't have a dance animation in ascended form lol) #Hope didn't even need to use divine intervention - this party is terrifying #Croissant hated him but in the end I loved Raphael I see why all you people like him #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 spoilers #act III spoilers #house of hope #croissant adventures #tav #raphael #lae'zel #iron flask #comics #ALSO shoutouts to you if you both noticed and knew which worthikids animation I borrowed the expression in panel 5 from

[yuwuta]

yuuta exhibits such previously abandoned, recently adopted dog behavior. incredibly anxious all the time, even though nobody’s out to get him or leave him behind. waits for you to return home or from school or from work excitedly, just to see you when you walk through the door. follows you around senselessly, hovering in your space just for the sake of companionship. initiates affection in prodding ways—starts off next to you, then a hand on your thigh, then deems it safe to lay all the way down, then slowly pushes his head into your lap. gets up whenever you need to get up, and resumes his position as soon as you’re ready. brings you gifts as a sign that he’s thinking of you, and maybe because he likes the affection it brings out in you, maybe because he likes the gentle affirming touches of a hand in his hair or a pinch to his cheek. rests his head on your stomach or his chin on your shoulder when he’s sleepy, stays there, immobile, and will not move unless absolutely necessary. sometimes he gets surprised when he hears you calling for him, there’s a moment of disbelief as he thinks “me? really? you need me?” but it’s very quickly overshadowed by this compulsive need to show up, to please, to do anything for you, which is why he always answers when you call. he doesn’t realize that he has puppygod eyes, especially when he’s excited or confused, but he does and it’s incredible endearing. very reluctant to share your space or attention after a while, considers that to be sacred and he won’t risk being let go or lost again, so as a safety precaution, he keeps himself right by you, waits for you always. 

#atp i need to shut and write the omega verse fics that consistency plague my mind #but while im here time for my obligatory megumi mention bc i mentioned dogs teehee #yes megumi attack dog hes megumi grumbly yes megumi bark bark bite bite BUT BUT BUTTTT #megumi is also used to like... hm........ taming? having? caring for? people in his life and also literal (divine) dogs #so for him yes he bites and barks #but he also... he gets confused if YOU dont follow him around like a puppy bc everyone else in his life has so why not you? #gojo's always been the annoying yapping pomeranian chewing on his arm even if he didn't ask #always in megumi's space even tho he didn't ask but he learned to deal with it #won't admit it but knows that too much attention is better than having someone who couldn't give a shit about you #yuuji is the golden in everybody's life and megumi is no exception #unmovable unshakeable and incredibly addictive even if he doesn't mean to be #and very very attached to the people he cares about so yeah yuuji is loud and annoying but he's also loyal and megumi respects that so fine #nobara is like... she decided she liked megumi and was upset about it so she bit his ankle and he tried to kick her off but she has too muc #pride to get shaken off by someone as scrawny as megumi and somewhere along the way megumi became impressed that she was still there even i #it hurt a bit and she was a little rough it's not like he was worse so fine whatever she can stay too #so if you like... if you dont hover around megumi if you dont pry if you dont prod then he has to be the dog smh #now he's gotta bite for your attention and nudge you and how annoying. he's gonna keep doing it tho. as long as he has to #or until you learn to fall in line and accept your leash too whichever comes first n e way.... anyway............. #somebody's pampered omega always gets what he wants megumi complex is showing...... #this was about yuuta right? ok i'll put his tags now.... #juju #jujutsu kaisen smut #jjk x reader #jjk smut #jjk fluff #jujutsu kaisen x reader #yuuta okkotsu x reader #yuta okkotsu x reader

[pain-in-the-butler]

A compilation of art for my Dadbastian fanfic Coattails that I commissioned from the incredibly talented @tomoyoo! They went above and beyond with the details... Each picture feels as cozy and warm as a storybook, right? I'm so delighted with how they turned out!! Thank you for making each one so beautiful! 🥹🥹🥹

#coattails #not sebaciel so please don't tag as such! thank you! #kuroshitsuji #the backgrounds are just gorgeous.. thank you for your research and dedication to them #the outfits in the first one are amazing! I love Ciel's shirt and Soma's whole ensemble is so cozy yet regal #look at Ciel in the cardigan in the third one though? he is cozy #the expressions are my favorite. they're so animated! just as I imagine them to be.. #I really like Ciel's in the first pic because I imagined him looking annoyed but you actually made him seem curious #and I actually like that more I think it's cute... he really does want to be friends with Soma huh 🥺 #Sebastian's expression in the third picture is great. >:o #he's about to throw hands with an old lady #Edward and Ciel's competitive faces! being silly... I love Them #Ciel needs to get swept up in silly competitions more often I think... #and then the last one!! bonding over tea! it's so amazingly tender 😭 #I don't think I imagined it coming out so calming and gentle... it's so emotional #it makes me want to keep writing! #if you are a Coattails reader I hope you love these as much as I do! #and if you aren't a Coattails reader... maybe these will convince you to become one? 😏 because they are so full of personality! #thanks times a million tomoyoo!! #(I should wait till tomorrow to post but I want to do it now...)

[otaku553]

Thinking very hard about an AU idea of mine. Reluctant king Sabo AU!

In which Sabo isn’t saved by Dragon, but survives long enough to drift ashore and be saved by the doctors of Goa Kingdom, who do so only to ransom his medical bills from Sabo’s parents. Sabo’s parents take him back, thinking that his amnesia makes him a clean slate, but Sabo, young and stubborn and unsure of his entire identity, knows that everything is wrong and runs again, and again, and again.

Until at some point, he meets the Revolutionaries, and realizes that he can be useful to them, provide them information, make something good of an inescapable situation. From then on, he starts acting the noble that he was born as, in order to be a more useful informant to the Revolutionaries, until sunk cost fallacy hits and he believes that being a noble is the only way that he can be useful to the Revolutionaries. So at that point, why not take it all the way?

At 17, Sabo becomes one of Princess Sarie’s suitors, and at 17, he has doubts about using the princess for his own goals. Sarie is a romantic, and she wants a dramatic fairy tale of a romance, and she was already charmed, but the moment Sabo opens up to her about not wanting to use her to get to the throne, having lofty ambitions of helping the people (just not the people she thinks he’s talking about), Sabo becomes the one she simply must marry, because surely if she tries hard enough, she can make him love her back.

Soon after, the king and his son die. Sarie’s father and brother die. And while Sabo conveniently ascends to the throne, he also swiftly implicates his father, Outlook, in the assassination of all heirs to the throne, resulting in Outlook’s arrest and subsequent execution. And thus, at 18, Sabo becomes king, and begins to gradually institute great changes to Goa Kingdom.

Design-wise, Sabo wears an eyepatch because his damaged eye is considered a grotesque sight by nobles’ standards. Under the eyepatch, he wears heavy makeup to hide the burn scar. These are both at the behest of his birth parents, who spin a story about Sabo having been born half blind to hide the fact that Sabo had been shot by a Celestial Dragon and save face. To those who have seen his scar, they fabricate a second secret story that he was unfortunately kidnapped as a child. Sabo never does find out, until he regains his memories, where the burn scar is actually from.

#one piece #sabo #one piece au #king sabo au #I might write something for this #I have a lot of ideas for it #I love au’s where sabo helps the revolution while not being actually a member of the revolutionary army #but I very rarely see ones that I like #I am going to oc-ify sarie so much. #i think sabo would hate being king. I think he hates everything about the situation he is in #but I also think that in the wake of forgetting himself he needs some connection to cling onto #even if that connection is the extremely inspiring stranger that barely knows him but is proud of him for helping #namely dragon. #I’m still unsure where to put stelly in all of this #I think stelly gets extremely bitter when sabo starts surpassing him in everything #because he was supposed to be the successful replacement of a son #im also debating whether or not I want sabo to remember his memories before or after marineford #because the moment he regains his memories is very clear to me. I want garp to see him at the reverie and punch him. #but I don’t know if I want that to happen earlier or later

[iridescentmirrorsgenshin]

Alhaitham referring to kaveh in ways which acknowledge his skill, and kaveh perceiving it as sarcasm, even though alhaitham refers to kaveh in the same ways when kaveh isn’t present is driving me a little bit insane - especially what this prompts the player to question!!

When we first meet kaveh in the archon quest the relationship between him and alhaitham is presented to us as “terrible” (courtesy of npc geoff who introduces kaveh’s return to sumeru city), and the cutscene in the house of daena demonstrates what this entails, being that the two cannot see eye to eye, and, seemingly don’t hold each other in high regard.

Alhaitham seemingly refers to kaveh’s genius in a sarcastic light and kaveh claims to despise talking to alhaitham because of his arrogance.

Looking to kaveh’s hangout, however, when the player has a one-on-one with alhaitham, the player gets a glimpse into alhaitham’s personal understanding of kaveh, and with this, his own views on kaveh.

Within this exchange between him and the player, Alhaitham uses Kaveh’s title without sarcasm, sincerely praising him and his skills, elevating him over ‘less skilled’ architects and asserting that Kaveh should have more confidence in his work.

The reason that Alhaitham does not openly praise Kaveh is stated here, being that “admonitions” will serve no purpose due to people being prone to fall into “similar pitfalls”, and that people should have the right to lead their own life, rather than have it interfered upon by others

The reading here is that even if Alhaitham did openly praise Kaveh, no difference would be made in Kaveh’s thinking. Yet, by refraining from praise, and instead goading, by this logic, this also makes no difference. Therefore, the question is raised, ‘why can Alhaitham praise Kaveh to the player, and not to Kaveh himself?’

When Alhaitham praises Kaveh’s work within Kaveh’s hangout it is through there being no record of issues in the reconstruction of port ormos, which is something kaveh states first - in this context, alhaitham notes the work as an “impressive achievement”, which kaveh assents to, as there is no standing in which this can be debated. Kaveh cannot resent a compliment steeped in fact, even from alhaitham

The problem, then, is rooted in alhaitham’s delivery, which relates to their core issue of miscommunication. Referring back to their exchange in the House of Daena, it is observed that Alhaitham uses similar descriptors of Kaveh to Kaveh, similar to the descriptors he uses to the Traveler in Kaveh’s hangout, however, Kaveh perceives these words as sarcasm.

This highlights the miscommunication between them and can aid in answering the question why Alhaitham cannot be open with Kaveh, as he will be misconstrued.

​Through Alhaitham’s repeated elusions to Kaveh when he is not present and his open esteem of Kaveh and his work to the Traveler, Kaveh’s assertion that Alhaitham holds him in a negative light is proved incorrect. This serves to highlight the miscommunication between the two, causing the player to question why they hold such contrasting views of the other.

Clearly, there is a reason why Alhaitham cannot openly express his regard of Kaveh to Kaveh, but this reason is obscure to both kaveh and the player.

In terms of queer subtext it’s pretty interesting that alhaitham’s high regard for kaveh is shown within the surface text and yet the reason for this secrecy is never made explicit within the story’s surface and is only to be inferred from alhaitham’s and kaveh’s character stories.

In terms of the two functioning as mirrors, the fact that the knowledge that alhaitham cannot outright compliment kaveh 1) is not only due to their past argument and lost friendship and 2) is also due to his awareness that kaveh cannot accept goodwill, is only obtainable by reading both kaveh and alhaitham’s character stories shows how intertwined they are as characters - you cannot fully understand one without the other

(Update: For more analyses like this, the essay this is taken from is now uploaded! It can be accessed here and here as as a pdf <3)

#haikaveh #kavehtham #kavetham #alhaitham #kaveh #okay i think my thoughts got derailed in the end but pretend they didnt #some of this is from the essay and you can probably tell because of writing quality #but i think it is so interesting that what alhaitham chooses to share with the player clearly highlights his regard and respect for kaveh #but his reason for hiding it from kaveh has to be inferred by digging into their lore #and when you realise that alhaitham doesnt want to cause a repeat of their past argument by encroaching on kaveh’s fortified boundaries #it only shows how MUCH alhaitham cares about him #im sick!!! #they make me sick!!! #and also that part in kaveh’s hangout when kaveh says he’s so used to sarcasm he cant tell what genuine praise sounds like #my boys #you need to talk #I AM BEGGING!!!!

[not-equippedforthis]

really love characters who have varied panic responses. kirk stating himself that he does not panic outright, externally, not in high-stress dangerous situations, but instead becomes tense and level like a wound string, on-guard: mostly because his role as captain necessitates that he maintain level rationality even when facing potential death as his training as 'the guy who tells you what to do when shit hits the fan' requires, but also because his childhood experiences taught him early that drowning in the desperate haziness of panic won't help you survive. especially as kirk already follows his intuition so deeply. he learned to grasp and contort the feeling. spock is the main person who represses his emotions, of course, but kirk does it to those deep-set, personal ones (this includes how he doesn't reveal anything truly personal about himself willingly 90% of the time, only what others already know/shallow anecdotes) in a much more subtle way that's really interesting to me. certified expert at avoiding the subject as long as he isnt caught out on the lie. professional bluffer.

in terms of past or parents we dont know much!!! hes known as the heart-on-his-sleeve guy!!! like yes he yells, he gets irritated, excited, hes a whirlwind of quick-thinking and plans and intuition, he goes out of his way to connect with his crew and shows it, when he puts on a little act or bluff he puts his heart into it and clearly enjoys the dramatics so much, at times he wears his heart on his sleeve, he laughs openly and is honest to spock about what he means to him, he's very sun-coded to me in a burning, passionate way, always intertwined with the stars and seeking them out, but when it comes to genuine deep-set turmoil? we dont actually know all that much about him??? hes so full of emotion and character (i love fics where spock characterises jim's mind/bond as a whirl of colour and sensations, hes a quick thinker!!! intuitive!! lively!!!) and yet its still so outwardly surface level. tarsus iv gets mentioned like twice? so especially here where kirk gets briefly jumpscared by the creature, because like:

its subtle but his eyes. his eyesss!!!!! kirk commands with his emotions but there's always some sort of level of control to it, or he transforms them into something that spurs on others or uses them to ascertain a goal: seeing unguarded fear/distress in his eyes even if its faint and brief (in this instance) makes me go insane every single time. like!!! its such a small moment!!! he isnt even panicking!!! really, he just got jumpscared!!! its insignificant!!!!!!! but seeing a two-second flash of actual, naked apprehension is just...oughhh,,,,,,,,,

oh god, and dont even get me started on the galileo seven episode where he assumes a tense level-headedness throughout the whole thing, irritated and apprehensive but not panicking, making sure he maintains intelligent rationality, even when he has to leave them behind, but when spock and the crew are confirmed safe and the bridge is occupied the camera pans to him and his eyes look like they're fucking watering and he's so achingly relieved. don't even talk to me. im. fuck.

he shows so so much but at the same time reveals so little.

#just had to write something about this because i loveeee seeing cool characters in distress. sorry but i need to see that boy PANICKING #im only on season 1 still so i dont know if there is a point where kirk openly seriously panics in the typical way #in high stress situations hes guarded but controlled #seeing him genuinely lose his nerve and start panicking would make me ouuughghgughg #like if he starts actually hyperventilating for kirk you know somethings so wronggg #but no yeah even if spock is injured or kirk is concerned about him he still shows that in the tense guarded high strung demeanor #same with spock really - his tone becomes tense and he uses jims name and its subtle but AAACKKK #i love the note of desperation being logical. that one episode is such a good exploration of spocks characer #i just think its interesting. to me it reads not only of kirks headstrong nature but also of his experience on taurus iv #not equipped for rambling #star trek tos #star trek #james kirk #jim kirk #captain kirk #kirk tos #hope this is right because im only just coming to the end of season 1 so #i love kirk so much though i cant even #hoping so so much ive interpreted him well #and that this makes sense. this is a ramble to the max. #he draws people into his orbit hes lively hes intelligent hes a burning whirl of passion and arhrthhhh