#just show me a video and I can build anything myself

[copperbadge]

I've been putting off asking this, because I didn't want to fuck with anyone's process, and I know it can be hard to talk about therapy or hard to do it if you've talked about it, but like...people who are in therapy and feel you're deriving benefit from it, what do you do in it? Not generic stuff like "work on my problems", specifically what do you say and do? What do they do? What is the benefit you feel you get?

The problem I'm having is that it feels like how Catholic friends have talked to me about going to confession as kids before they fully understood how it worked, making stuff up to confess because they hadn't done much to warrant confession. I keep trying to come up with things therapy could help with, stuff to bring to the meetings, and not finding much. My therapist is fine, it's not that she's unhelpful; she does the stuff a therapist is supposed to do, like validating or active listening, but I don't really need validation and I don't feel any benefit from just talking about stuff. I think my access to catharsis is very narrow if it's present at all.

I tried bringing therapy types of problems to her, interpersonal stuff, but most of those I don't really have a say in solving, and the ones that I can influence I generally have already worked on. It feels like roughly 99% of my problems could be solved with money (admittedly more money than I have or probably ever will) and the other 1% aren't...solvable. Like there isn't much a therapist can do about the AC being off for the next three weeks in my building.

But my only other experience of this is when I was a kid and didn't get a say in it, and that generally felt like an obscure form of punishment. And I know people do get something out of it! It's not me trying to take a passive aggressive swipe at therapy. I'm just perplexed as to what I'm meant to be doing to make it useful. I feel like I'm missing the point, but also like maybe I'm just not someone the point was meant for.

I'm not trying to call myself the picture of mental health or anything but like, you can't talk-therapy ADHD into submission, and the other issues aren't under my control. I tried floating the idea of improving my emotional regulation but I suspect this is as good as it gets, because there doesn't seem to be any kind of process or system for fixing that. I don't especially anticipate it or feel better or worse about things after, I just log off the call and get on with fixing dinner. It's a non event other than the copay and an hour spent on Zoom. Which I can spare, I don't mind the money or the time, it's just....why am I doing it?

So, what do you do? Because if I get answers about stuff I'm not doing then I can try that, and if I get answers about stuff I've tried, maybe this just isn't for me. Wouldn't be the first time and won't be the last that I'm not quite built for something that other people find valuable. Although admittedly usually it's a tv show or a video game and not mental health treatment.

#sam has adhd #not yet fired from therapy

[the-soliloquies-of-sadists]

#371

“I’ve talked with Officer Reinhart.  We are at a loss with what to do with you.  We could arrest you and the two men over there for public sexual indecency.  I don’t know much about those two, other than the one runs a construction business and the other is an assistant coach for a high school across the state.  Arresting the three of you would ruin your three lives.  I can’t take just those two men in.  Arresting you, knowing your dad as I do, he would have my badge, Reinhart’s too.  He’s a fucking asshole, and I know you know it too.  I just have to ask, what possessed you from cruising so openly in the city where your dad is the police chief?  That doesn’t sound too smart….

“I mean you were getting spit roasted buck naked by those two men.  You may have been out of sight of the parking lot, but you didn’t even try to hide what you were doing back here between these two abandoned buildings, taking it in both ends buck naked.  Speaking of which, where the fuck are your clothes?...  In your car?...  How the hell did you go from your car to behind this wall in the daylight?...  What?  You’ve been here since dawn?  Jesus!  Were there other guys here?...  Six!?  And those two guys make eight? 

“You fucking whore.  You slut.  Faggot, you are a piece.  What the fuck am I going to do here?  I can’t just let you all go.  I need to think here…. 

“Are you…  Are you getting hard?  You are!...  Wait, are you turned on to me calling you a faggot and a whore?...  If you don’t want to speak, then nod.  Ha!  Thought so. 

“You like to be slapped around, used by men?...  You are just like my girlfriends.  I go to any one of my three girlfriends’ places, smack her across the face, and just shove my cock into any of her holes.  If she complains I just smack her again and remind her that her number one job is to drain my balls.  And if she didn’t like it, there are other bitches to go to dump my jiz in. 

“You’re just like them, another dumb cunt who lives for cum.  I bet you would love it if I did that to you.  You need to be treated like I treat her; ain’t I right?  Don’t answer.  Your pecker is throbbing.  Fucking faggot, there ain’t no way I’m going to stick my fat cock in you.

 “I bet Reinhart would.  He’s a sperm burper like you.  He doesn’t know that I know, but he is…. 

“Reinhart!  Over here….

“While he’s coming over, keep your head bowed, your hands behind your back, and your legs spread a little.  Show him how cum dump faggots behave in front of real men.

“…It seems that pussy boy here is a faggot, you know the type of queer boy that likes to get roughed up by men like us and those two over there.  Look at how he’s leaking, just from me telling him he’s shit.

“What are we going to do with them?... 

“…No shit!?… 

“Well, well, well.  Faggot, faggot, faggot.  So you told those two men over there that your dad is the chief of police, and that if you ever got caught then we wouldn’t or couldn’t do anything to you all.  You faggot.  You fucking manipulative fucking faggot.  Your dad is the one that had us set up these stings.  He’s expecting us to round up what he considers perverts.  And here you are playing games.

“Reinhart, go get those two.  Bring them over here…. 

“Gentlemen!  I would introduce myself, but let’s keep names out of all this.  Address me as ‘Officer’.  You’ll be ‘Coach’ and you’ll be ‘Foreman’.  This is ‘Faggot’. 

“Faggot here thinks he in control since his dad is my boss.  Fuck that.  This is what’s going to happen.  I still have my body cam video where it shows me approaching you two spit roasting faggot here.  It got good looks at your faces, all three of you.  I don’t have to do much to submit that video, and charge each of you.  I can wipe it away without much notice.  No more evidence.

“No I’m not letting you guys go, not yet.  You have to do one thing for me.  For all his game playing, this fag needs to be punished.  I want you two to finish what you started.  Yeah, I want you to fuck his holes.  More like rape his holes.  Smack him around.  Piss on him.  Spit in his face.  Treat him like the faggot whore he is.  Spit roast him.  This will also be filmed, but this will be low enough to hide your two faces.  You won’t be able to be identified.  I don’t want your faces anywhere in here.  And no audio will be recorded. 

“I know what I’m doing.  I’ve been filming bitches getting gang banged for years.  And I know how to get the best shots.  The video is all about the faggot son of the Chief of Police being a fucking cunt whore. 

“I want this video to use against him, or better yet, against his dad sometime later.  The chief is a strict right wing Christian. 

“Faggot.  This is your time.  Go on get back into position over that barrel you were on when I came up.  Reinhart, put the cuffs on him; we don’t need his hands in action.  Foreman and Coach get in place.  I don��t care who takes his mouth and who has his cunt.  It won’t matter as you will be probably switching holes when I tell ya. 

“Coach, I would lose the T-shirt as it has your high school’s name on it….  Nice body.  Fuck yeah.  Use that toilet whore’s mouth.  Remember to smack him if he uses his teeth.  And don’t hold back.  He’s a faggot after all, not one of these queer boys that you would want to ease up on.

“Damn, Foreman.  That’s one giant hog you got there.  It’s going to need a lot of spit.  But don’t put too much though.  Now shove it to the root.  The fag needs to feel its size tearing his cunt up.  You know what the difference between a pussy and a cunt?...  You only care for the pussy….  Now shove it in!

“Fuck yeah.  You hear the bitch screaming around Coach’s cock?  Coach, you feel it hunh?  That smile says it all.  Signal when you are getting close.

“You two enjoy yourselves.  It’s all about your pleasure and his suffering.

“Reinhart, I see you over there rubbing that sizeable bulge of a crotch.  Why don’t you take your cock out and jerk yourself?  I’m not telling anybody; your secret is safe with me.

“Fuck yeah guys.  This is how cum dump whores should be used.  Fags, bitches, it’s all the same.  Use them and then toss them aside.  That’s what they deserve.

“Hey faggot!  Look at the camera.  Let the world see that you live for sucking cock.  I can see it in your eyes that you are struggling, but that you wouldn’t want it any other way.  You have that hunger.  That need.

“Switch holes….  Coach dive in to his pussy!  Foreman, hold up.  Show the faggot your battering ram.

“Faggot look at it.  Look at how it’s all slimy.  That’s from your cunt.  A cum stew from a half of a dozen men.  It’s nasty,… but you need this nasty sludge in your mouth. 

“Fuck this faggot’s throat.  Be brutal.  The focus is on your pleasure.  His should be ignored….

“You ready to cum Coach?...  Then just dump your load….  Don’t pull out….  Fuck yeah! Do it!...  There you go!  Fuck yeah.  Fuck.  Yeah!... 

“Foreman, pull back.  Coach here needs the fag’s mouth for clean-up duties.  Why don’t you go back to his cunt and add your load. 

“Hey Coach, if you have to take a piss, just unleash in his toilet throat….  No?  Well pick up your clothes and get going.  You are free to go….  Damn!  That’s one big smile.  It’s either because you had a world class faggot drain your balls, or that you are not getting arrested….  Probably the later….  Go on.  Get out of here.

“Reinhart!  The faggot’s mouth is open.  Don’t worry, I’m not going to tell anyone you are as much of a fag as the cunt here.  I haven’t told anyone anything in the past five years, I don’t plan on changing that.  And I got enough video here for what I want.  So you don’t have to worry about me filming you either.

“Look at the faggot.  He want’s your cock.

“Hey Faggot.  Is this the first cop cock?...  No? Oh shit!  We’ll have to come back to that another time.  Look at the camera as Reinhart shoves his cock into your toilet mouth.  Now that is the look of a natural born cocksucker.

“Foreman, that’s it!  Ram that cunt.  Hell yeah!  Smack that ass again!  Harder!...  Damn you like making the faggot scream, don’t you….  Making bitches suffer gets me hard too….  You don’t have to wait for me to tell ya’, if you need to nut, nut away!  Yeah, use those handcuffs as a handle.  That’s some serious pile driving.  Don’t worry that you are causing the faggot some pain and discomfort.  That’s his issue not yours.

“Reinhart, get over here.  Let the man do what he needs to the faggot to get off….  This is fucking hot, isn’t it?  Look, your secret is safe with me.  You live alone?...  Good.  After the foreman blows his wad, why don’t you take the fag cunt home?  Finish using him there.  Before you leave, send me the foreman’s contact info… as well as the coach’s.

“Look at that!  Foreman’s getting close….  Relentlessly piling into that cunt.  That’s a fuck machine of a man. 

“GO FOR IT.  BREED THAT FAGGOT’S CUNT!  Fuck yeah.  Make sure he cleans of your cock.  Ha! Ha!

“When he pulls out of the faggot’s mouth, take the cunt back to your patrol car.  Bring him to your home.  I think to boy needs some one-on-one discipline.  I want to hear all the details afterwards.  Good….  He’s done.  Take the fag out of here….  Holy shit!  The fag is rock hard!

“Faggot, go with the officer.  Don’t worry, daddy won’t find out.  And you treat Reinhart well.  Remember, I just took a video of you getting spit roasted.  Don’t do anything stupid.

“Foreman!  C’mere.  That was amazing.  Say, you into women too?...  I’m always on the lookout of men who are willing to use and abuse my bitches with me.  Is that something you would be interested in?  Good, I’ll get your info from the officer.  You like to fuck faggots too?...  I get it; you just like to fuck, don’t ya?  You don’t care about who the hole is attached to.

“You have any bitches on the side?...  No?  What about faggots?...  You have a number on call?  That’s one of the things I like admire about the fag lifestyle, they are so… available.  It takes me some time to find an acceptable bitch.

“Are any of the ones you have like the faggot you just fucked?...  I have to say, I had a hard-on watching you pound fuck the faggot’s cunt.  I wanted in on the action.  I really did.  But fucking a fag is so foreign to me.  I fuck bitches.  But still you didn’t pull back when you were slamming into him.  I want to do that.  So, you have a faggot in mind?...  Cool. 

“I would never want to touch the Chief’s son.  He carries too much baggage with him.  And Reinhart, he’s a great guy, but I don’t know that much about him in this context.  I will find out, but I don’t want to wait.  You think you can call up a faggot for tonight?  I’m so fucking horny….  I want to fuck some ass, and not a bitch’s ass.  After watching the three of you fuck the fag, I need to try it out.  But if I’m going to fuck an ass, I want my first time fucking a fag to be the way I want: aggressive and brutal. 

“Do you have a faggot cunt to call?  Why are you staring at me like that?...  It looks like you are about to say something.  Go on.  Oh, wait a minute….  You want to be that faggot?  You want MY dick in your ass.  Don’t you?...  What nothing to say?  I’m right hunh?

“Hell yeah!  Fuck yeah, I’ll fuck your cunt.  If I’m fucking it, then it’s a cunt.  I never would have thought that you took it up the ass….  I would have thought that you—

“What?  You’ve never been fucked?  Wait, so we will be each other’s first?  Fuck yeah let’s do this.  You have any plans for the rest of the day?...  Cancel them. 

“…Reinhart just sent me your contact info.  You don’t live too far from me.  You are a couple of blocks from this bitch I dumped last year.  I guess you are going to step into her role, at least for tonight.  Come closer…. 

“…Well you handled my face slap pretty good.  This is what you can look forward to.  I get rough, really rough.  But I think you can handle it. 

“Let’s go back to my place.“I can’t believe I’m doing this.”

[fredwkong]

Himbo Maker: Jean

Jean was deep into muscle. Ever since he’d been the smallest kid in his class every year in school, he’d felt an intense need to someday become the kind of guy who could really dominate a room with his body.

However, even as an adult, he was still a little guy. He’d tried for years, but no matter what, his dark-skinned body stayed slender. So instead, he spent all his free time on forums dedicated to muscle growth, living vicariously through the experiences of others as they gained muscle and posted pictures.

One day he received an unusual message request from another guy on the forum. He’d never seen him in the threads before, but his username was Himbo_mkr so Jean assumed he was probably here for roleplay.

Techie_jean: Hey man. What’s up?

Himbo_mkr: Not much bro. Just been chilling and looking at pix of muscley dudes. I noticed you don’t make many posts. You good?

Techie_jean: Guess I’ve just never done the smart thing and gotten myself a plan.

Himbo_mkr: Brah, you don’t need a plan! I can help you get big in just a few minutes! Wanna give it a shot?

Jean chuckled. Yep, this guy was looking for some roleplay. He looked around his room. Well, it wasn’t like he had anything else to do this afternoon but play video games and build some Gundam. He may as well have some fun with this guy first.

Techie_jean: Sure! What do I have to do first?

Himbo_mkr: The first thing you gotta do is get dumb, bro! Muscles aren’t made with smarts, you need to have nothing in your brain but flexing, eating, and fucking to really build hot muscle.

Straight to the point, huh! Jean was about to type a message in character as a dummy when he felt a tingling in his head. His brain suddenly felt like it was full of cotton, he was having trouble putting thoughts together. Slowly, he made his fingers move. He had to really focus to string the words together.

Techie_jean: Bro… What’s happenin to me?

Himbo_mkr: You’re getting dumb, bro! When a guy gets really serious about getting big muscles, the power to do it comes from all of his useless brains! The smarter he was at the start, the bigger and dumber he ends up.

Jean… supposed that made sense? He couldn’t figure out how this guy could be wrong. He wasn’t really the smartest guy, after all. He scratched his head and looked around his room. It was like it was changing before his eyes, but that couldn’t be right either. No more video games, just a pile of gay muscle pornos. His gundam and other dolls replaced with sex toys and gear that he used to show off his skinny little body. Jean was definitely not smart by any means.

Dummy_jean: Yeah bro, I’m pretty stupid. What were we talkin about?

Himbo_mkr: Getting you swole, huhuhu! Now that you’ve drained your useless brain, your muscles are gonna get huge, bro! You’re a big thick muscle bro!

Jean gasped as an indescribable warm sensation overtook his whole body. With a crack, his back, arms, and legs extended, making him a towering beanpole of a man. His muscles started to vibrate, and then expand. His legs jerked as his quads and then his hamstrings inflated, and were quickly balanced by a thick, jiggly muscle ass. His pecs burst forth from his chest to form a sturdy shelf, and then his back thickened along with his lats, belly, and growing arms.

Looking around, Jean took in the changing space. There was a new dent in his dirty mattress from his huge body, and a weight bench and rack in the corner. Of course, he had to lift all day every day to keep up his bulk. The walls and ceiling were covered in pictures of all Jean’s favourite bodybuilders, his inspiration and his jerk material.

Dumbro_jean: Whoa, bruh, my muscles are gettin huge!

Himbo_mkr: That’s not all, bro! That thick Quebecois cock of yours is keeping up too!

Quebecois? Jean was a bit dumb, sure, but he was pretty sure he’d grown up in Atlanta… Quebec City, right. His dick lengthened and lightened at the same time, and the pale skin tone rushed over his still-growing body. A healthy layer of fat followed, leaving him looking absolutely enormous. Above the blond behemoth’s bed, a Quebec flag unfurled on the wall, showing his national pride.

Jean could barely remember who he’d been before. He knew he’d been smaller… smarter? He’d been American. The idea that he’d so quickly become this huge pale Quebecois stud had him grunting and palming his dick. Soon he was close, cursing quietly in his deep new Quebecois accent.

QC_jean: Calisse, bro, gonna cum!

Himbo_mkr: Yeah brah! Shoot that musky hockey bro load.

Hell yeah! Jean grabbed a used athletic jock that had just appeared next to him. He remembered: he’d worn it for practice this morning, and it was still warm and wet with his sweat. He loved being on the ice, and being around a whole team of big, dumb, sweaty Quebecois hockey players meant he was always leaking in his jock. He held the pouch up to his nose to inhale the musk of his sweat and precum permeating the jock.

His whole room was ripe with used hockey bro gear. Jean hated cleaning any of his equipment while he was on a points streak, and it’d been a few weeks since he’d failed to score in a game. The hockey stuff scattered on the floor was ripe with stale sweat. Being a hockey bro was so fucking hot.

Jean’s thick cock unleashed a torrent of cum as he continued to curse in Quebecois. When he came down, he gave himself a sniff and looked back at his battered old laptop. It was only good for porn and surfing forums, but a bro like him didn’t need it for anything else.

Right now, the browser was open to one of his favourite sports jock forums. He had a post all ready to go, a pic of him after the last game, half undressed in his sweaty gear with his hair stuck to his face, looking like a perfect dumb hockey bro. Quickly, Jean also snapped a picture of his spent dick and sent it to his friend.

Hockey_jean: Include this too?

Himbo_mkr: Definitely, bro! You love showing off your hockey himbo body.

Yeah, this guy was right about everything. No one loved to show off that he was a hot hockey bro for the bros more than Jean.

Inspired by a chat with a bot of my own creation. Format inspired by Codename: Bear_mkr by @biggerchanger

#himbo maker #himbofication #dumber tf #hockey player tf #musk tf #race change #quebecois tf #male transformation #reality change #chat tf #male tf #all fwkong #sports tf

[sh0tanzz]

hello I hope you are having a great day ☺️, i really like your readings hehe, please do Anton as your boyfriend reading soon, I am looking forward on your other readings of the other groups as well.

rest well and take care 💕💕

you are sooo sweet omg but here we go !!

Anton as your boyfriend based on Astrology

(reminder that this for fun and astrology is something I study for a hobby, these are all inferences based off of observations and not exact fact unless I knew him myself !!)

warnings: small mention of suggestive innuendo but nothing extremely graphic I'll only do NSFW asks if requested.

Aries Sun: Many people are "surprised" that Anton is an aries since the stereotype is that they're hyper and aggressive but aries men can be pretty shy + to themselves initially and don't expose their extroverted behavior till they're comfortable. Aries is cardinal, they enjoy starting things and once they master it will move on to the next task (Anton went from swimming to instruments, to producing, to being an idol what bigger example do you need 😭) before the relationship actually starts he'd try to approach but wouldn't just straight up flirt he'd want to begin a friendship or some form of banter/rapport with you. Since there's no water supporting his sun in his big six it shows he wouldn't be a super sappy "my heart bleeds for you" type of boyfriend but would still be passionate and serious when it comes to you as his partner. If you had a rocky past he'd try to have you focus on the "now" of everything and help you not loath. Has his random moments of boldness but they go as fast as they came LMAOO so savor them when you can.

Aries Moon: Many people view Anton as very timid and though he is on a surface level he is most definitely capable of boldness and quickly acting on his wants, yes he is a contained individual but when he wants something he'll shamelessly go after it. So yes ! he is 100% capable of initiating things whether its physical affection or if he wants to see you. If he wants you he wants you, plus, in a video he claimed that if it was just him and the person of his affection one on one he'd express himself more freely. Which makes me think if it were you two one on one he'd be super real about his feelings and his guard wouldn't be as far up.

Aries Mercury: Yes. the headcanons that anton would spam your phone with tiktoks and memes are true. He wouldn't be afraid of hitting you up frequently and seeming "needy" like he loves you duh ofc he's gonna text you literally at any given opportunity. Would probably have your post notifs on and would be the FIRSTTT person to like your post and story. He'd be very honest and straightforward when communicating so you wouldn't have to worry about reading in between the lines or having to guess about what's going on between you two.

Taurus Venus: He could have short lived phases of being possessive and literally viewing you as "his person". He wouldn't want the relationship to continuously rush into new bases he'd want it to have a natural flow and wouldn't rush you into anything but would still want to know where you stood on certain things and be in the know (his aries stellium influence, he welcomes change and newness but, as said before, wants it to come naturally and at a certain pace). He'd be sure to be someone you could rely and depend on and would be as patient as possible with you. Would express his love through physical touch such as cuddling, resting his head on your shoulder, napping together and through spoiling you like paying for your meal, sending/bringing food and random valuable gifts at whatever time. HE JUST WANTS TO TREAT YOU RIGHHTT. Also would be very sentimental like he'd have photos, songs, posts and things saved or kept from when you two first met or started dating. He'd make the relationship so domestic oml. Ngl due to taurus venuses need for natural build up and the childish friendly nature of his aries placements he's probably a sucker for the friends to lover trope me thinks 😭

Gemini Mars: Oh he'd just love having one on one talks with you about anything interesting under the sun none of the convos would be surface level or shallow. He'd also flirt SM THROUGH TEXT every gemini mars dude I've known gets so flirty otp. Plus you wouldn't have to worry about the relationship having an air of monotony either. People claim that gemini mars people can be hot and cold but I don't think that's the case I think they're just aware that sometimes for a healthy relationship space is properly needed, so he'd let you have time to yourself/himself but with his taurus venus during these periods you wouldn't feel alone or abandoned because he'd still be there for you. Similar to Wonbin he could find your voice very attractive or a turn on. Gemini rules the hands, arms and shoulders so he may kiss you there or like to have some physical contact with them. Gemini also rules the lungs and nervous system so he might try to 'take your breath away'...take that as you will LOL.

Other Aspects:

Moon/Neptune Sextile: He is hyperaware of the feelings and emotions of those around him no matter how subtle they seem and also uses music as a vice so he'd use it to connect with you.

Venus trine Jupiter: He's naturally a giver and wouldn't be overly forceful, He honestly would nurture the relationship as much as he possibly could.

Potential Toxicity: (reminder that any/everyone is capable of having toxic or negative traits, these could be POTENTIALLY true)

Venus/Square Neptune: Is willing to go LENGTHS for a partner/people he loves but may take things a bit too far or do "too much" and once you try to explain that though you appreciate his efforts it's a bit much he may take it the wrong way and feel unappreciated or used.

#riize #riizenet #riize x reader #riize imagines #riize icons #riize moodboard #riize scenarios #riize fanfic #riize anton #riize wonbin #riize fluff #riize smut #sungchan #eunseok #riize sungchan #riize shotaro #briize #sohee #osaki shotaro #anton x reader #wonbin x reader #riize reactions #jung sungchan #love 119 #kpop astrology #kpop fluff

[just-my-type-x]

Old Washoe Club

Based on these requests: 🌹Colby x reader where they are messing around like play fighting and reader gets hurt

🌹could you write like a super fluffy colby fic, just like laying in bed after a investigation or something. hope you’re having an amazing day!!

🌹Colby x reader where reader sleeps with stuffed animals and just loves them in general, i just think that's really cute lol

The imagine isn't written to entirely match the actual video.

"Oh wow, i actually thought this place was refurbished. It looks like an abandoned building", Sam says and we agree as we step up the stairs

"The smell is horrendous, what is that?", i cover my nose with my sleeve and look back to Kat and Colby who were already scrunching their noses because of the smell.

"I didn't want to mention it, but it smells like death", Colby chuckles and we keep going up the stairs

"We'll pretend you didn't say anything", i say and we all laugh.

"My ass is fat", Colby says out of breath when we get on top of the staircase and as breathless as we are, we still manage to laugh at his statement. We look around, checking out the three rooms surrounding us. We choose to go left and we start exploring the room, noticing the X on the floors for the Ghost Adventures' cameras. Colby shows it to me and i walk next to him to see it closely.

"This is so cool!", i jump around the sign like a kid. "Oh, the floor is so loose", i frown and immediately step aside from that area, Colby following me. "We'll have to be careful there".

We get out of the room and enter the doll room, which gives us all the creeps. I don't know what kind of imagination people had back in the 18th and 19th century, but these are not dolls kids should play with. I walk closer to one of the dolls, keeping eye contact with it until my eyes hurt.

"i swear to God, if this doll blinks, it's out the window"

"I think you'll jump first honestly", Sam says and i laugh, walking away from that doll. I see Colby across the room checking a bigger doll out, so i take the chance to go behind him and scare him. He jumps and the doll falls on the floor with a loud bang.

"You made me drop a possessed doll, y/n!", Colby says and moves me by the hips until i reach a pile of dolls, most of them made out of porcelain. I fall between those and the whole room is filled with giggles. I get up fast and make sure to put the dolls back in place.

"I'm getting haunted tonight", i say and step on another loose part of the wooden floor. "Oh my God, this place could collapse"

We take the rest of the tour and we start investigating. We start in the dolls room, where we all sit on the floor and wait for something to happen. Sam turns on the spirit box and the speaker, and we start asking questions.

"Is there anybody here with us?", Sam asks

>>

"hey"

"Was that a hey?"

"I think so", Colby answers

"How many people are in this room?"

>>

"seven"

"Seven, again", Sam points out and we all shake our heads

"leave"

"Did it say leave?", i ask and immediately turn my head when i feel something on my shoulder. "Something touched me", i put my hair on the side to make sure it's not it that caused the feeling

"me"

"Did you just touch y/n?", Colby asks and we wait for an answer that doesn't come. "There are many dolls in this room. Do you play with them often?"

>>

"play"

"Can we play with them too? You can join us", i get up with Colby and we go to the corner where the pile of dolls i fell into is. Sam sets up the rempod next to the dolls, while Colby and I stand out of the range of the rempod. "I don't know how to play with haunted dolls?"

We laugh and Colby takes a smaller sized doll and throws it at me. I throw it back like it'd be a ball and we do so until it doesn't feel like an investigation anymore and we are standing far away from each other, on opposite sides of the room.

"You better catch this, y/n", Colby laughs and i prepare myself to catch it. He throws the doll my way, but because of the distance, I'm not able to reach it and it falls with a loud bang on the floor. Immediately, the rempod goes off and lights up in all the colors it has.

"Oh, you made the spirit mad", Kat states and gets up from the floor.

"We're sorry we dropped your toy", Colby apologises and i pick it up to put it back in the pile. He turns off the rempod and picks it up, walking away from the toys. "If we get possessed it's your fault", he jokes and i playfully push him.

"You need something up your ass too", i say and he pushes me too. I push him back and when Sam turns off the camera until we go to the other room, Colby starts running after me around the room. We giggle and hug each other when he catches me, but when i run away from him again, the spot on the floor i step on collapses under my foot. My ankle gets stuck in the hole, the broken wood scratching my skin even through my jeans.

"Oh my God, y/n", Colby comes by my side and helps me ballance while Sam and Kat come rushing back into the room.

"No way, I'm gonna go get Justin", Sam leaves the room fast, while Kat tries to loosen up the wood spikes so i could take my foot out of there. I wiggle my ankle around but all i can do i let out small cries because of how bad the scratching feels.

A few minutes later, Justin helps us out and i take out my foot, the hole in the floor making the room unavailable for the rest of the night and the upcoming days. I let him know it just happened, that the floors are very loose here and there, and he apologises for the inconvenience.

We take a break and i go back to the car, where i take care of my bleeding scratches, wrapping my ankle in the thin bandage from thr first aid kit. Feeling brand new, i go back to the group and we finish investigating.

~~

Colby opens the door of our hotel room and as we bye-bye Sam and Kat for the night. I limp to the bed, my ankle feeling a little sore after the incident. I sit down and take off my shoes and getting ready for a quick shower before Colby and i get in bed.

"I'm sorry for tonight, baby", Colby whispers, barely awake. I lift my head off his shoulder and look at him, the dim light making it easier for me to distinct his features. He looks up at the ceiling, not blinking once, as he chews on his lip, nervously.

"You're sorry for...?"

"You got injured because i asked you to come along to an unsafe place. And I'm sorry i wasn't cautious enough with you", he kisses my forehead and i smile

"Babe, you don't have to be cautious, I'm a grown woman and nobody's at fault for the fact that the building is so old. Maybe it is our fault just a little bit because we knew how bad the floors are. I wasn't responsible enough to take care of myself.", i chuckle and i peck Colby's lips, his arms pulling me closer on his side, deepening the kiss.

"I love you"

"And i love you so fucking much", i hug him as tight as possible and i bury myself in his chest, while he gasps for air. We lay there a few more minutes, going through the events of the night, holding hands, caressing each other's backs and playing with each other's hair.

I turn on my side, ready to fall asleep after a long night and Colby turns on the opposite side, our backs glued to each other.

"One more thing", i say excited and Colby let's a sleepy, uninterested hmm?. "Give me my stuffed penguin please. It's on your luggage, by your side", i instruct him and he extends his arm in that direction, throwing the stuffed animal between us. "Thank you", i lay back down and Colby shifts in the bed, his arms snaking around me. He laughs when he feels the penguin where he rests his hand.

"You're so cute.", he kisses my head

"Why?"

"Because it's cute how you can't fall asleep without it", he intertwines our fingers together, both of our hands on the toy. I wiggle my body to get closer to him and i kiss the back of his hand, finally relaxing.

#colby brock #colby brock imagine #colby brock smut #sam and colby #sam and colby imagine

[toomanywatchers]

My Thoughts on WatcherTV

Hi, I am here to put away my meme-making skills to express my genuine thoughts on Watcher’s announcement; WatcherTV. Before I get into it, this is for any of those at Team Watcher who might be seeing this message: Just know we love and support everything you do for us. Y’all truly do not get the credit you rightfully deserve. I hope with this change to a separate streaming platform you guys can create the content you want to make, pull in creators that you’ve always wanted to work with, and share voices/topics that may have not had the chance to shine because of YouTube’s heinous algorithm. I know myself, and many others, are excited to see what WatcherTV brings. For instance, I already watched Road Files and the trailer for Travel Season on the new platform. And guess what? I love it! I just love BTS-centric shows and seeing the vibes established on Travel Season. Along with more Lizzie/possibly-more-sightings-of-other-Team-Watcher-peeps content?!? If this is what holds for the future of WatcherTV- oh boy, do you already have me more on board than I already was.

I also send my sincerest regards too. We all know that the internet can be a negative space with many sharing their uncensored thoughts, and I hope none of you take the hate to heart. I also hope you can take the weekend to breathe, drink some water, spend time with loved ones, and celebrate this huge step you all are embarking on. I am truly excited to see what is to come on WatcherTV will be there with each step to support.

Now to my fellow fans of Watcher. I understand the concern and it is okay to have concerns. It shows that you truly care for Watcher as a company and don’t want anything negative to come about with this decision. BUT on the other hand, spreading hateful messages? Not. Fucking. Cool. It is quite simple to express concern in an appropriate/respectful manner. Remember, this is a company full of living and breathing human beings. Trying to justify “who is to blame” and pointing fingers is just childish. Guess what? No one is to blame, it was a company-wide decision that they all made and spent months upon months to create.

Yes, it does suck to see content that was free for years be moved to a paywall, but remember they are independent artists that have to pay employees, freelancers, locations, and themselves! Have we not been advocating for fair pay among creative individuals when it comes to WGA/SAG-AFTRA strikes and then AI art taking jobs away from artists? If this is what the company needs to do to survive while not sacrificing the high-quality content they make for us, then we should give it a shot! Plus with the current discount available, the subscription is not that pricey for the amount of shows they produce! Literally for January and a bit of February, they were uploading 2 podcasts and 2 separate shows… that’s a lot of content! If you have never sat down to produce, direct, write, perform, edit, and all other aspects it takes to make a fine-polished YouTube video, it takes a lot of work!

To add to this, Watcher already makes content that far expands past what is recognized as normal for YouTube. They build individual sets for each show that is produced, and they travel all over the place for Ghost Files and soon-to-be Travel Season. It costs money to produce content and YouTube?- It’s just not how it was years and years ago. Views on long-form content have been dipping and with the over-saturation of sponsorships, I am assuming they are not making enough profit to sustain the business on the current platform. Also, monetization on YouTube has been a killer for many channels because of vulgar language issues and just being demonetized for no rhyme or reason. By moving over to a streaming platform of their own they can continue to create what they want to create, and make it without any restrictions or rules holding them back. Too pricey? Find some friends who also like the content and split the pricing evenly. Only want to watch certain shows? Then make a monthly subscription for the time that show airs. There are many solutions that you guys see as a huge problem, and don’t get me wrong I have my concerns. I shared those concerns briefly in my theory post about them still being a young channel, but I’m also unaware of the actual analytics and revenue that is currently being brought in currently to the company from YouTube alone. 

It’s a huge step that has garnered negative feedback from those spreading hateful messages about the company and to other individuals for supporting the boys *cough cough I see your messages and comments cough cough* is truly uncalled for. I will be taking a bit of a break from my socials as I wait out the storm though if I have the energy, I might stream on Twitch again and talk through this with y’all if you can sit down and have a civil discussion. As for now, it’s your choice if you continue to support. My goal is to continue to make funny little memes, and if I am allowed to I will be working on a crack video pt.2 after Travel Season premieres. Remember to be kind and to put yourselves in their shows. Just the boys even though they are receiving the brunt of the hate, but for everyone at the company.

Your local memester watcherina - Fritz.

#watcher #watcher entertainment #ryan bergara #shane madej #steven lim #watcher tv #my thoughts

[ghostlykeyes]

Hooray! Requests are open! And I rush like the wind into your abode with my idea! How about this idea? Heartsteel!Kayn x Gothic singer!Reader? Reader is the leader of the Gothic rock band the band. In their video, as well as in the songs themselves, there is a lot of gloom, mystery, and also a lot of creepy themes. There are a lot of cemeteries, abandoned buildings, etc. And in the main life Reader likes to visit cemeteries and abandoned buildings (just like me. Because there you can relax from the hustle and bustle of the city. Peace and quiet). In the clips, Reader often acts as a vampire. I would like to know the dynamics in their relationship) Thank you very much!)

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

GIF by thedemonlady

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

HEARTSTEEL KAYN: GOTHIC/SINGER PARTNER HEADCANONS ♡ Gender Neutral ♡ Light to mid-NSFW sprinkled throughout... couldn't help myself (but I KNOW none of you bonk-deserving DEGENERATES mind much 0-0 ) ♡ TW: Slight Sexual Content ♡Keyes write less than one thousand words about Kayn challenge (GONE WRONG) (GONE SEXUAL) (TOTALLY IMPOSSIBLE)

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

KAYN

Yone's the one who "introduced" you to Kayn, in a way. After seeing one of your music videos, Yone had a feeling Kayn might like your style and sent him a link. What Yone didn't foresee was Kayn becoming instantly fucking obsessed with you. But how was he supposed to resist? You, with your blood red lips and your black lace everything and your haunting, creepy voice...how could Kayn be anything but instantly, painfully in love?

Since your group was much smaller than Heartsteel, it wasn't hard for Kayn to get you to notice him. Sure, maybe the guys teased him for DM'ing you around the clock and turning up at all your shows like a damn groupie until you told him he could take you out sometime...but he's the one who bagged the goth hottie in the end, so who's the real winner?

Kayn keeps a mini silver bat keychain clipped to his bag, a constant reminder of you. Even though your aesthetic is gloomy and, frankly, a little ominous, he still says that your little bat is his good luck charm.

Of course Kayn knows that you scream in your songs—he listens to them religiously, after all—but the first time he heard it in person? Holy shit, he got chills. He knows he shouldn't interrupt your band practice. It was already nice enough of you to let him sit in and listen. But he can't. fucking. help it. "That was the hottest shit I've heard in my life," he tells you after you finish the song. "You're so fucking cool." When the band takes a five-minute break halfway through rehearsal, Kayn tugs you into the nearest bathroom and shows you just how sexy he finds you. Needless to say, you get a bit more screaming practice than you bargained for...

Typically, Kayn prefers the stage to the crowd, but even he can admit that being in the audience at your shows is a really fucking good time. The low, moody lighting, the smoke machines belting fog across the stage, groups of your fans proudly sporting plastic fans and screaming the haunting lyrics to your songs? The atmosphere is fucking impeccable. Plus, in a crowd like this, he can easily get away with going full Rhaast. (He's even started a mosh pit or two...or more. Probably best not to keep track.)

Kayn's favorite part of your vampire-ensemble? A pair of silver tooth caps, shaped like fangs (naturally). When he steals you away from rehearsals or pulls you into a dark backstage corner after a show, Kayn's quickly licking his way into your mouth, tongue dancing along the edge of the metal. "Bite me," he often growls into the edge of your ear as you're kissing down his neck. At first you thought he was kidding, so you'd always give him a light nip and then find your way back to his hungry mouth. But, one time, he smacked your ass as you were working the soft flesh of his neck and you, surprised, really bit down—hard. The way Kayn squirmed into you, panting and whining as a dark bruise started blossoming to the surface of his neck, told you that's definitely what he'd been wanting all along.

Since Kayn's been in the industry for a long time, he's a lot more used to dealing with paparazzi than you are. Whenever you come to him for advice on dealing with the cameras and harassment, he scoffs, instantly annoyed. "Oh, those fucking assholes? If you get in their faces enough, they'll back off." Don't worry, though, he'll do the 'getting in their faces' part for you. If you're out with Kayn and the two of you start getting mobbed, he's not afraid to elbow a reporter or two, or break a few camera lenses. Your management is pissed by the bad press, of course, but it's done wonders for your privacy.

Kayn's favorite pet-name for you is his 'baby bat'. He often calls you that after you do something cute. "Ugh, my baby bat," he says, squishing your cheeks with his hand and planting a kiss on your puckered, smushed-together lips. "So fucking adorable."

Your music taste has earned you the great honor of sharing a Spotify account with Kayn. You're the only person he'd ever even consider allowing to add songs to his playlists, or influence what music the algorithm spits through the radio while he's driving. Just don't steal the account while he's listening (he gets pouty).

Whenever the two of you are hanging out Kayn tries to snag your notebook, flipping through for a glimpse at your newest song concepts or music video ideas. He can't help being curious! You're one of his favorite artists (the fact that you kiss him a lot helps with that), so he's always eager for a sneak peek at your next creative endeavor. Your brain fascinates him, and he can't wait to see what ominous project you put out next.

Anytime you've got a photoshoot, count on Kayn to show up. He loves to see you in full vampire-mode, looking flawless in you Tim-Burton-esque makeup and your platform boots. He's got an eye for edgy photography and iconography, too, so he's a great person to draw inspiration from (even if he tends to annoy the photographers—he's not afraid to tell them if their photos are shitty). Some of his best photo ideas? A boudoir-esque shoot centered around a velvet-lined coffin, a Halloween photo-set with charmingly-poorly-carved jack o' lanterns (carving credits to Heartsteel), a birthday party in a graveyard. Not all of his ideas are so extravagant, of course, and some of his best are the most simple. He's taken a simple shot of his neon eye that you loved so much, you made it the cover art for one of your singles.

Kayn has you saved in his phone under a black heart and a bat emoji.

While the graveyard might be a little too quiet and still for his tastes, Kayn's glad to accompany you on trips to abandoned buildings. He's committed arson in explored his fair share of old warehouses and factories, so he knows what to expect when the two of you break into an abandoned building on a date. He's got a full toolkit—flashlights, a crowbar, lockpicks. Whenever you've got to smash a window or crack a lock to move forward, Kayn eagerly volunteers to clear the way. "You know, since I'm a gentleman," he smiles, sweeter than sugar as he kicks down a door. (You have to physically restrain yourself from rolling your eyes at that.) The two of you spend hours wandering through old buildings on your days off, brushing through years of old, quiet dust. When it's time to leave, Kayn breaks a bottle of spray paint out of his bag. He always tags the building before you clear out, one little symbol for each of you; his Rhaast-grinned Heartsteel icon, and a bat next to it.

#heartsteel #heartsteel headcanons #heartsteel kayn #kayn #heartsteel x reader #kayn x reader #kayn/reader #sheida kayn

[jamie-leah]

Lifeline Pt 3

Bucky x Reader

Series

Summary: You have a past that you're running from and maybe Bucky can be the lifeline you had no idea you were searching for.

Word Count: 2,037

Warnings: Descriptions of domestic abuse, mentions of death and suicide

A/N: Sorry I missed last weekend, I had a funeral to attend but here is a slightly longer part for you. I'm keeping a tag list so let me know if you want in. Requests are also open if you would like to send one in. Enjoy!

<-Previous Part Next Part->

Masterlist of Masterlists

After that day, Bucky spends more time at your apartment. In fact, he spends more time with you in general. He comes to the diner more often and any day you both have free you spend it together. You’ve kicked his ass at all the video games you have, he’s shown you all his favourite spots in New York, including a hole in the wall book shop that you stayed at for hours.  

You were at this very book shop with Bucky when he says, “so, every month at the tower we all try to stick to this family dinner thing.”  

This piques your interest. Bucky doesn’t talk about the others very often. Almost like he doesn’t want to mix you up with his drama. Like he wants to keep you away from the danger of his work. You’ve never pushed him, even though you love the stories he tells of him and Steve back in the 40s. Or the pranks he and Sam play on each other every so often.  

You never push him to talk about things he doesn’t want to because you know you have so much you can’t talk about either.  

You nod to Bucky to show that you’re listening to him, “well, there’s a family dinner tomorrow night and my therapist thinks it would be a good idea to invite you...not that I don’t want you to be there or didn’t want to ask you myself. I want you with me all the time, but I didn’t want to subject you to the chaos of everyone or Tony Stark or Natasha or Sam. Actually, you know what? Forget I said anything, this was stupid-”  

You can’t help the laugh that bubbles out of your throat, “Bucky, I’d love to go with you.”  

Bucky spins around fast, dropping the book he was holding, “you would?”  

You chuckle, picking up the book and handing it back to the idiot in front of you, “they’re your family. Plus, it would be nice to have dinner at yours for a change.”  

Bucky breaks out into a grin, grabbing you in a bear hug and twirling you around. When he sets you down, he says, “look, I have to go but I’ll pick you up around 7?”  

You nod as he races out the door to get to his therapy appointment on time, laughing as he practically skips out the door like a little kid.  

Tomorrow comes around faster than you would have liked. You feel like you’ve had no time to prepare for this dinner. You’re meeting Bucky’s family; it feels so important, and you don’t want to mess anything up.  

You still haven’t heard anything from Andrew which is a miracle and if it keeps going like this you might get to build a life here. A life that you hope involves Bucky for a long time to come. But it won’t if you mess this up tonight.  

Staring into the mirror you can see the bags under your eyes from another sleepless night. The nightmares now involving Bucky and being ripped away from this life that you’re starting to love. It always wakes you up feeling breathless and hopeless because there’s a part of you that knows Andrew will come one day and you’ll just have to leave.  

Are you being cruel? To you and to Bucky? Making you both feel so deeply for each other when you know at any moment it could fall like a house of cards? And what exactly do you feel for the man? You swore to yourself that would never get involved romantically again but with Bucky do you have a choice? Can you just be friends with someone that feels like your other half?  

Just then you hear a knock at the door, distracting you from your thoughts. You rush to the door thinking it’s Bucky coming to pick you up but when you open up your smile fades.  

A delivery man is holding a bunch of red roses, thrusting them into your hand as soon as he sees you. Your blood runs cold. You stand, staring at the flowers like they may bite you at any moment.  

When you tear your gaze away from them the delivery man is nearly at the elevator already, “hey! Wait, I didn’t see a card with them?”  

He always leaves a card. This can’t be him because he always leaves a card. The delivery man shrugs, “the guy didn’t want a card.”  

You hear the elevator ding like background noise. Your whole world comes back to the roses in your hand. Andrew picks a different flower every time so there’s no way to know and the delivery man said it was a guy that ordered the flowers. He knows. Andrew knows.  

You drop the flowers like they burn you and race into the apartment. Fight or flight kicks in and you know the dance by now. Heading straight to your room at the back of the closet is your go back. Savings you’ve put away from your job, a couple of old family photos and a passport.  

You promised yourself that if New York did not work, you would try a different country altogether, hoping he would never go that far just to teach you a lesson.  

You reach the open plan kitchen just as Bucky runs through the door looking frantic. His eyes land on you but you don’t have time to stop as you throw more supplies into your go bag.  

Bucky says, “I saw the door open and the flowers on the floor, I thought...I thought-Are you leaving?” 

You turn to look at him when you sense the feeling of betrayal behind his words. Words get caught in your throat, so you don’t say anything. You were barely holding it together before Bucky got here, but now it seems almost impossible to go with him watching. Almost.  

“I know you may not like the flowers, but this is a little extreme, right?” He goes for humour but even you can tell its strained.  

And then his meaning penetrates the fog in your brain, “you? You got the flowers?”  

Bucky shrugs, “they were supposed to arrive yesterday after you said you’d come to family dinner, but I ordered them too late, so I was hoping to beat them here and give them to you myself but well...” 

He trails off and your shoulders sag. Bucky got the flowers. The flowers were from Bucky. The go bag slips from your grip, hitting the floor with a thud, drawing Bucky’s attention once again.  

“Why? Who did you think they were from?”  

You don’t answer. How can you? The answer is so much more complicated than just a name and yet at the same time it isn’t.  

A lump forms in your throat. You want to tell him. You want so much to let someone else carry this burden with you but every time you told someone your story, they either sided with the monster or ended up dead because of him. Because of you. And you would walk away before you saw anything happen to the man standing in front of you.  

Bucky shakes his head. Walking over to pick up the flowers, he lays them on the kitchen table, “I can’t do this. I can’t be here if it means that you might leave at any moment. I’ve been left behind before and I barely made it out alive. I can’t go through that again.”  

And your heart aches. It aches so much that you don’t know how you remain standing as you watch the only person that’s ever made you feel safe start to walk out the door.  

If you were less selfish, you would let Bucky walk out that door and never come back. You would leave him behind and leave New York. You would be miserable just to keep him safe. But you can’t. And you don’t.  

“The first time he hit me, it was our honeymoon.”  

Bucky stops dead. He doesn’t turn around, but you take it as your cue to keep talking, “this guy at a bar flirted with me. He gave me his best pick up line, I laughed and told him I was flattered but I was married, and the guy left me alone. Andrew, my husband, saw and challenged me on it in our hotel room. 

I laughed and told him to stop being silly and that I had seen him flirt with other women before too. It was the first and last time he hit me with an open palm. I made excuses for him. I didn’t want to admit that I cut all my friends and family off for a monster. He was all I had left. But after a few years, when he was dishonourably discharged from the Army, I spoke to his closest friend, Tommy. Tommy was a good man. I showed him the bruises and he believed me. After all these years, he was the only person to believe me.  

Tommy had sensed a change in Andrew, he became less bothered about hiding his temper when the Army chewed him up and spat him out. Tommy confronted him. A week later, Tommy went missing. Three months after that his body was found in the woods. Suicide they said.”  

Bucky finally turns to face you, his eyes swimming with anger and pain so much like your own that you have to look away. You stare at your hands instead, “after Tommy was gone, Andrew got worse. I was going to the hospital at least once a month and everyone believed all the lies. It got so bad that I once went to the police. They called Andrew and he told them that I wasn’t doing very well, and they believed him. After that incident I ended up in the hospital for six weeks. He told them I fell from the roof.”  

Bucky lets out a string of curse words that have you smiling despite the circumstances, “How did you get away?” 

“I got a job. In secret of course. I arranged it so I would only work when he did, and I worked in the next town over. I saved and saved and saved. And then one night I put sleeping pills in with his food. Once I was sure he was asleep, I took the car and left in the middle of the night. I ditched it the next morning and walked to a bus station.”  

“But he still finds you?” Bucky asks.  

You nod, “I haven’t been able to stay in a place longer than two months before he sends flowers and a card to wherever I’m staying at the time. It’s almost like he’s enjoying playing cat and mouse. He’s letting the game go on because I know the moment he catches me this time, I’ll be dead.”  

Bucky takes a step towards you, “no. I’m not going to let that happen.”  

“Tommy said the same thing.”  

“Yeah, well, Tommy wasn’t a super soldier.”  

“But he was a soldier.”  

Bucky shakes his head, “it's been longer than two months. Maybe he’s given up. Found someone else or got what’s coming to him from someone else.”  

“Maybe”, you whisper.  

Bucky closes the distance between you, pulling you into the warmth of his body, holding you like it's a miracle you’re still standing, “you can’t keep running. I won’t let you. Why should you have to run because that waste of oxygen can’t keep his hands to himself?”  

You don’t have an answer, so you just cling to him tighter. Bucky pulls back to look down at you, “promise me, you’ll come to me first. Come to me before you run.”  

You shake your head, “that’s just your way of asking me to stay.”  

“So, what if it is? I deal with bad people and monsters all the time. Let me help you with yours? Come to me first, please?”  

And despite your better judgement, despite all the promises you made to yourself, you tell Bucky yes. You tell him that you’ll stay. You just hope you’re not sealing both of your fates because of it.  

Tags: @ordelixx @cjand10 @identity2212 @sukaibg

#bucky x reader #bucky barnes #bucky fanfic #bucky #bucky x you #bucky series #bucky fandom #bucky fic #bucky x y/n #bucky fluff #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes x female reader

[lovelybucky1]

Neil trying to be cool to get the attention of a client (disinterested in him) being totally cringe and geeky with his movie recommendations

im a filmbro just like neil so i really resonate with this

my inbox is open for requests!

warnings: one mention of sexual content, mild mentions of violence, neil being a geek with zero rizz

masterlist

It’s not often hot people walk into Gumshoe Video. There’s the regulars, the families, the loser film bros who are there at least four times a week, the teens who try to rent pornos, and old people looking for the classics.

When you walked in, Neil almost dropped his fast food cup filled with Dr. Pepper. You’re exactly his type, and he pushed the other employees out of the way so he could be the one to help you.

“Hi, I’m Neil. How can I be of service?” he greets you, perhaps a bit too enthusiastically. You look down at his name tag and note that it says owner underneath his name.

“I don’t need any help, thanks,” you smile politely and continue walking. You aren’t trying to be rude, but you had a long day at work and this puppy dog of an employee is only going to get on your nerves.

“Are you looking for anything specific?” he asks, following you down the aisle.

You sigh. “No, just something to watch.”

“We have a huge selection. What’s your favorite genre?”

You resign yourself to the fact that this man is going to be up your ass until you leave the store.

“I don’t know. Action? Comedy?”

“Well, right over here we have Fast and Furious.” You wrinkle your nose. “We also have The Dark Knight.”

“Uh, no thanks. The villains in those movies are always so cheesy.”

Neil hums and scans the shelves, looking at the collection of videos for rent. “If you want a comedy we have Daddy Daycare, Superbad, American Pie…”

“I think I’ll just look around myself-”

“Or if you want something classic, we have Citizen Kane, Casablaca, The Godfather, Apocalypse Now-”

“Look, Neil,” you sigh. “I appreciate the suggestions but I really don’t need any help.”

Feeling rejected but not letting it show, Neil nods and steps away. “If you need anything, I’ll be behind the counter.”

You nod and watch him walk away before turning to browse the movie selection by yourself. It takes you a while to find anything that you were interested in, but you settled on Friday the 13th. It’s not what you’d usually go for, but your life needs a little excitement here and there.

From across the store, you could hear the other employees ridiculing Neil for “striking out”, though you’d have to argue that he never even got up to bat.

When you walk up to the counter to rent the movie, no one is to be found. You look around and find a bell on the counter labeled ring for assistance. You hit the button and the bell rings, and immediately following the chime is a thud and a curse. You peak over the counter to see Neil crouched underneath it, rubbing the top of his head.

He stands up and looks at you, putting on a charming smile like he didn’t just embarrass himself.

“All set?” he asks.

“Yep,” you reply shortly, handing him the box.

“Friday the 13th,” he reads. “That’s a good one. You didn’t tell me you’re into horror.”

“I’m not really. Just wanted a change,” you reply, figuring if you engage in his small talk, he’ll let you off the hook sooner.

“Did you know this was filmed at a real summer camp in New Jersey?” You shake your head. “It’s still operational, actually. The only set piece they had to build was the bathroom; everything else was already there.”

“That’s really interesting,” you smile, lying.

Unfortunately that was the wrong thing to say, because it made him perk up. “If you think that’s interesting, wait until you hear this…” He ducks under the counter again and comes back up with another movie in hand. “Scream was based on a series of real murders in the 90s. Ghostface was based of the Gainesville Ripper who killed five students in Florida. He wore a black ski mask, which was the inspiration for the movie.”

Neil must have noticed your concerned face and stopped.

“Uh, sorry. I guess giving a stranger facts about a serial killer is kind of weird,” he chuckles.

He scans your movie, swipes your card and prints out your receipt. Before he handed it to you, he scribbled something at the bottom.

“Thank you for renting from Gumshoe Video. Have a nice day,” he smiles.

You give him a polite smile back and on the way out of the door, you look down at the paper in your hand. He wrote what looks to be a phone number, but his handwriting is too messy for you to make out the digits.

#neil lewis #neil lewis x reader #cillian murphy #cillian murphy x reader #watching the detectives

[patheticdeperateanddumb2]

We connected on a kink site but after writing with me you realized I'm quite inexperienced and don't really know what I'm doing.

You are a gentleman and of course ask me about my likes and limits etc. making me feel safe while secretly already planning how to break me. I tell you that I don't really like anal and only tried a little princess plug once and it was too uncomfortable but that I really wanna try bondage.

We decide to meet up at a bar and I'm incredibly nervous but you charm me and make me feel calm. You buy me one drink after the other and subtly encourage me to drink more. When I'm getting more than a little tipsy you show me some bondage poses we could try and I immediately get excited so I chose one and we get ready to go to your place.

Once there you talk me through everything assuring me we can always stop if it's getting too much lying through your teeth. You purposely choose poses where my ass would be easily accessible to you. You tie my hands to the bedframe and secured my legs up there too so I'm completely exposed and start to play with my pussy making me wimper and moan a little. I'm starting to really enjoy myself and you savor it and get faster playing with my clit asking me what I want. "Pls fuck me" I shyly exclaim but you are not satisfied slapping my cunt "louder I couldn't hear you" "I want you to fuck me pretty please" getting embarrassed about being such a slut that lets a man tie her up on the first date.

You get out your cock that was bigger than I'm used to playing with my entrance and I get a little scared again if it would hurt. You push your head into me laughing at the shocked expression I must have had. After slowly fucking your head into me for a little making me beg more you finally thrusts into me in one hard thrust making me yelp while fucking me meryless and hard after and slapping my face. I cry out completely overwhelmed and in pain. "Pls stop that's too rough" you only give me a sadistic grin "well it's not like you could do anything about it you naive fucking slut".

You start to tease my asshole and push one finger in without any lube just the little wetness dripping down. I start to cry realizing what I got myself into. "Oh fuck you look so hot when you cry and I haven't even really started" you pull your cock out and lining yourself up with my ass. I'm trying to struggle and get away but there is no use. You push the head in even if it requires lots of pressure to break my little hole in.

"I love it when whores like you are in pain and I can finally make them useful" I'm sobbing now from the sharp pain going through my body and you slap me even more. You have trouble fitting more in since I'm so tense so you slap me a little more before choking me out using the opportunity to get all the way in and fucking me awake using me like cock sleeve and ignoring my please to stop.

"you fucking wanted that I have you an video begging me to fuck you and now I'm doing just that the way you deserve" sheer panic builds up in me as you point to a semi hidden camera. You pull out a strong vibrator pushing it at my clit on the 3rd setting while still destroying my ass. "If you cum I will pull out I promise" you say mocking me but all the new sensations and stuff are just too much and I can only struggle. This is going on for another hour getting slapped, pinched and hurt by you but then I feel something built up inside. Against my will an orgasm is building up and I explode squirting over you.

"See I knew you were a disgusting slut that needed to be treated like that" while pulling out my ass and pumping a load into my unprotected cunt plugging it up after and forcing me to clean you cock.

"Well i hope you are ready for the next round later! then I can actually try some suggestions from chat." while getting a laptop and showing me the life stream and comments.

#rap3toy #attention wh0r3 #dumb slvt #dumb wh0re #needy wh0re #cnc daddy #cnc k!nk #rough cnc #rap3 fantasy #rapetoy #rapekink #abuse k1nk

[chirpos-pencil]

I'm a little lost on how the 77th Class can atone for their crimes as Remnants of Despair by . . . living on Jabberwock Island for the rest of their lives, far from the main population, far from the people they might've hurt and even killed?

It felt a bit like they're . . . running away from what they had done.

Please don't get me wrong! I really loved it when they returned to help Makoto and his friends to deal with all those soldiers and stopping Ryota from spreading the Hope video. I really loved their moment to shine, but I just . . . wanted them to do . . . more, I guess?

I wanted them to stay around and help the general public to heal from the Tragedy. Hm, maybe they don't need to actually show their faces in public, but at least help Makoto and his friends rebuild society from behind closed doors?

. . .

They're isolating themselves in Jabberwock Island to 'atone', they say. But I'm not sure how exactly that's atoning. To atone means to actively make amends and reparations for the people you've hurt, yes?

You know, wasn't the 78th Class's killing game publicly aired by Junko to make the people outside turn to despair? In a way, 78th Class had unwillingly became an instrument of despair (similar to the 77th Class, but with the method of brainwashing).

The survivors from the 78th Class decided to actively work to rebuild the broken world. See from the Epilogue of the first game:

"If there's no road, you just gotta build one! Creation... Fate is telling me to remake the world " - Hiro

"Maybe I should find them and make them work for me. To rebuild the world, we must first rebuild the Togami dynasty" - Byakuya

"I'll just get some flour and make some myself! And if there's no flour, I'll just grow some wheat!" - Aoi (when Hiro said there could be no more donuts)

"Even if everyone in the outside world is gone... Even if the world is steeped in despair... As long as I have people like you around, I can face forward and keep moving. If we can get out there and do something, have some sort of impact..." - Kyoko

"But what can we do...? There's so few of us, and we're so small. So what can we do...? ...No, we can probably do anything. Yeah! We can do anything!" - Makoto

In a way, I guess you could say that's their form of atonement. Atoning for the actions of their 'blackened' classmates. Atoning for the actions of Junko, with whom they still shared some good memories, despite everything. Atoning despite being innocent.

As for the 77th Class . . . Oh, I don't know. I mean I sympathise with them. They were brainwashed to commit acts of despair, and if they ever show themselves in public, they'll surely get persecuted. I guess they got no choice but to live on the island in silence from everyone else.

Actually I'm not entirely sure where I'm going with this, haha. So, I'll stop.

Note that I'm biased towards the 78th Class, so take this post with a grain of salt.

#danganronpa #makoto naegi #chirpos chirps

[lulusbabygirl]

Do you have any tips on how I can be more girly like you?

Thank you 🥺 this made me happy (and turned on) that other girls are looking to me for tips on how to be a better girl!!

1: Embrace your natural femininity. So many fakeboys have shoved their natural feminine traits down so much they can forget they’re there. Remember, you were socialized to be a girl for sooo many years and you can’t run away from that!!

2: Voice train!! It’s not just for trans fems, we shouldn’t have to have a male voice either!! You’re still a girl even if your voice is deep but passing as a girl again would be so amazing right??

3: Shave any masculine hair. If you have some hair that women usually have it’s okay, even though I love a fully shaved body, but shave off alll that gross masculine hair. It’ll make you feel so much prettier right??

4: Talk like a bimbo! Even if you want to have a more traditional feminine look, I think having a cutesy speech pattern is sooo adorable and girly!! Use multiples of punctuation, use cute emoji, and pay attention to how men talk and avoid sounding like them!

5: Play with your pussy everyday! I think paying attention to the part that separates you from real men the most is sooo important. Get big fat dildos to stretch out your vagina, play with your clit rubbing it in circles, get a clit sucker!! I love my clit sucker and I can’t cum any other way. You should be edging your pussy to stay a girl for longer, and if you’re able to fight the post orgasm clarity please don’t try to be a boy after you cum! Remember, it’s not good for you to be a boy even if you’re dysphoric.

6. Misgender and “deadname” yourself and find others to do it! Hearing your birth name and female pronouns will turn you on and also slowly fix you! Your boy name and male pronouns should be forgotten eventually. Just keep building up until you don’t respond to he/him or your boy name ever again! Btw anon if you want to tell me your real name I would love to hear it! Anyone who needs their real name exposed I want to hear it!

7: Watch sissy hypnosis or porn made for women. That stuff makes me feel so girly it’s crazy. I love when I open a video and it immediately knows what I am. I recently watched a gangbang video with my girlfriend and the whole video was talking about us being gangbanged and showing all these beautiful women on screen!! All I could think about it how much more I look like those girls compared to the superior men. It made me crave detransition more than anything has lately and I’ve been thinking about it all the time since I watched it~!!

8: Most obviously, wear makeup, grow your hair out, wear women’s clothes, and get off T. I know it’s easier said than done and you can fight me on it but it really is the way to go. I haven’t been able to get myself to stop hormones but I’m really trying and that’s all we can ever do! You just need to realize that you’re 100% supposed to be a girl and you need to stop making stupid decisions for yourself. Finding an owner who wants to detransition you is such a good idea!! It helps so much to have a rational person in your life who can guide you and push you to be who you were meant to be, a beautiful woman!!

I think I ran out of tips but if you have any more questions never hesitate to ask! I love helping other women find their true path and it makes me so happy that fakeboys can look up to me. Anyone who’s reading this and and wants to detransition you can do it!! You’re a beautiful woman and you deserve to see it too!!!

#ftm girl #fakeboy #ftm detrans kink #ftm misgendering #forced detrans #misgender me #detransition kink #detrans k1nk #ftmtf kink #ftm sub

[ladyyystark]

Im in need of this biodad fic where Peter feels replaced by Morgan. I dont care about Peter being the self-sacrificing idiot who likes kids and loved Morgan since the first time he saw her. I want him feeling betrayed, forgotten, unuseful, REPLACED. I want him feeling like he doesnt belong anymore to his family bc Morgan is there and it was so easy to forget him and build a new life while he was dead. I want him to be a dramatic and scared 16-year-old teenage boy who just woke up to lose all the life he knew. Let him be selfish for once for fucks sake.

+ points if Peter doesnt want anything to do with Morgan but Morgan was raised idolizing Peter and is so excited bc my brother is finally home! Now we can play together and he can make me fly like daddy showed me in the videos. Peter wants his old life back and Morgan cant wait to start living with Peter, so we have a teenager running away from a toddler but in the end, it gets better.

Im this close 🤏 to write it myself but too drunk to do it rn

or if anyone knows something like this or is writing it I will give you a donut if you share it with me 🍩

#irondad #peter parker #bio dad tony stark #tony stark #morgan stark #pepper potts #spiderman #spider man #ironman #irondad and spiderson #irondad spiderson #happy hogan #rhodey #james rhodes #ao3 #fanfiction

[agirlwithglam]

✨Time for Vanilla’s Opinion 🍰

Edition #1: thoughts on hate & caring about what others think of you.

Regardless of what people think of you, you need to understand that it only matters/ means something if you decide it to. What i mean is that i know lots of people say “you should only care about your opinion. Others opinion of you dont matter” but that’s only true if YOU DECIDE IT TO BE TRUE. I will say this again: this is your life!!!!!

If you choose to accept and believe the nonsense that others will think/ say of you, then you are saying “i dont have the confidence and self love in myself to only accept my opinion, so im going to give you the power over my emotions and how i act :)” do you really want to do that? Because that’s what you’re doing when you start acting based on how you think others are gonna think of you and what their perception is.

Remember: what other people think of you is just THEIR PERCEPTION. Stop making your personality & yourself dependent on what another person thinks of you!!

And also, some people will literally just hate on anything because of how sad their life is. I mentioned this before, and im gonna mention it again: there could be a video of CATS PLAYING on YouTube and you’ll find someone criticising and hating on that. That’s how sad some of these people in life are. So stop trying to or thinking that since you love yourself and you’re “perfect” that everyone should/ would like you because THATS NOT TRUE.

I read this quote once: “you could be the most juiciest, yummiest apple in the world, yet there would still be someone out there who doesn’t like apples.”

“So then.. what do i do if I receive hate? It’s still mean and hurtful.”

WHY does it still hurt??? WHY are you giving that person ANY control over how you feel???? If this person is someone who’s your friend or close to you, when they do it, TELL THEM THAT YOU DONT LIKE IT!!! Without communication and understanding, you will only start to build resentment for the other person, creating a toxic relationship. Comunícate your boundaries clearly by telling them that firmly, NOT in a joking manner, that you don’t like it. Now ofc if they do it once more, remind them again. Most of the time, if this person really cares about you, they will respect your feelings and stop doing that. But if it happens more times, you’ve gotta stop giving your energy to them. Reserve that for something that actually matters.

You may or may not have noticed that i did not write “just cut them out” because i know how difficult that can be, especially if you’re a kid still living with your parents. Because at some times, you’re stuck in the situation you’re in for a while (for example: a workplace, living at home, in 1 class at school) so its not as easy to just “cut them out”. And that’s why i wrote “stop giving your energy to them”. Because THATS what the parasites are feeding on! Your energy and attention! Take that away from them and see what happens.

BUT….;

know that what I’m NOT saying is to be a stone-cold bitch who doesn’t care at all about others or their happiness. (Because honestly, doing that shows me that you’re a lot more insecure) A lot of people now would be like “but it’s not my responsibility to ensure they’re happy. They are their own person in charge of their own actions and feelings!” Sure, ok. But then don’t come whining to me about how you have no friends and how you feel so lonely and sad. ‘You’re your own person and in charge of your own feelings’, remember? So if someone decides to leave a relationship (whether it’s a friendship, or with romance) with you because you don’t make them feel happy, then don’t be surprised about that because ‘they are their own person.’

But look, i completely agree with the fact that you and every individual indeed are in charge of their own feelings and actions, but just stop and think about it for a sec; would YOU want to be in a relationship with someone who doesn’t give a hoot about your happiness? Yuck, no!!

So to put it in more simple/ plain terms: be KIND to people, bring smiles to peoples faces when you can (give them a compliment, help them out, listen to them, offer advice, etc.) but don’t something that compromises your own wellbeing and happiness. Cus like, how is complimenting someone’s hair or eyes gonna hurt you? If anything it would just make you happier. But also don’t live your life constantly on the edge, afraid of what he’s gonna think of you, what shes gonna say about you, etc. etc.

I guess that’s pretty much it. <3 anyyywayys i hope you enjoyed the 1st edition of the series! If you have requests, comment on this post of send an ask using the ‘tea’ button ☕️

Xoxo, Vanilla

#agirlwithglam🎀✨ #vanilla self improvement⭐️ #thoughts #self improvement #vanilla’s opinion #my thoughts #it girl energy #becoming that girl #self development #it girl #girlboss #self love #girlblog #dream girl #becoming your dream girl #self validation #confidence #that girl #kindness #life #advice #girlblogging #vent #rant #socialising #up levelling

[cringe-but-proud]

I read your wonka fic and wanna say that it’s amazing for your first time writing x reader! I was hoping that you can do a miles morales x reader where reader miles best friend and is a fan of Spider-Man (reader don’t know miles is Spider-Man) and readers birthday is coming up so miles knowing how much reader loves Spider-Man decides to do a guest appearance at their birthday while being Spider-Man. Reader is happy Spider-Man is at their party but is sad that miles isn’t there. Was hoping it can end with Miles revealing he’s Spider-Man and confessing to reader!

Thanks for the request! I had fun writing this one!

Miles Morales x gn!Reader

Warnings: A little cursing, reader being sad for a min

A/n: Just wanna let everyone know that my asks are open 😈

"Dude, I swear to God, he was right next to my apartment. Right there! If I had been looking out the window, I totally would've seen him!" You spoke excitedly as you showed Miles a video of the infamous Spiderman swinging past your apartment building.

"Yeah, that's cool. That's really cool." Miles nodded.

"Do you think I'll ever get to meet him? Like, for real? Face to face?" You asked as you turned the phone back to yourself, rewatching the video a few more times.

"I mean, he's in Brooklyn a lot, so..." He shrugged.

"Yeah... It's weird, I feel like everyone I know has had some sort of encounter with Spiderman, but I've never even spotted him in person."

That was true and it was intentional. Whenever miles was being spiderman, he did everything in his power to avoid you. He liked you a lot and you were his best friend. If he ever had to interact with you as spiderman, he'd probably get nervous, slip up, and blow his cover.

But, he did feel bad. You were obsessed with Spiderman. And he'd heard over and over again about how badly you wanted to meet him.

"Do you think he does cameos or anything? Maybe I could buy one of those for myself with all the birthday money I'm about to get tonight." You suggested with a chuckle.

"Nah, I don't think he does those."

You sighed and began to go on a rant about how much money spiderman could make from doing something like that.

But, Miles wasn't really listening. He was starting to get an idea. And if he wanted to follow through with the idea, he'd have to leave. Like, right now.

He stood up. "I gotta go."

"What? Really?"

"Yeah, I just remembered, uh, I gotta finish doing my laundry."

You blinked. "Alright, dude. See you later."

This was gonna be the perfect birthday present. All he had to do was stick to the plan.

Miles was going to come to your party as spiderman. He'd take some pictures with you, wish you a happy birthday, and try to keep all the talking to a minimum.

Perfect.

Your party was on the rooftop of your apartment building, which worked out perfectly for him. He arrived fashionably late, when the party was already in full swing, and he was quickly spotted.

"Yo, is that Spiderman?" A small crowd quickly formed around Miles as he searched for you.

"Yeah, yeah. I, uh, thought I'd swing by wish a happy birthday to... Y'know, Whoever." Miles said, trying to act nonchalant.

"Spiderman?!" You were suddenly standing right in front of him, eyes wide, mouth agape.

"Hey! Happy birthday!" He said to you happily.

"How'd you know this party was for me?"

Shit.

"Uh..." Miles shrugged. "Spidey-sense?"

"Cool..." You smiled. "I'm such a big fan. You- You're like- I mean, you're you. You're Spiderman." You gushed. "Could I take a picture with you?"

"Yeah, for sure." This was going better than expected.

"Can I get one next?" Some random guy piped up.

"Uh... Sure." Miles shrugged.

"Could I get one too?"

"... Yeah?"

Ok, this wasn't part of the plan. Miles was now stuck awkwardly taking pictures with your friends and family.

And where were you? He hadn't seen you in a while and this was YOUR party!

Should he be worried? Well, whether he should or shouldn't didn't really matter. Because he WAS worried.

Miles slipped away from the line of people wanting pictures to look for you. He found you sitting behind your apartment building on some steps.

He cleared his throat. "Hey, uh... Why aren't you up at the party?" He asked as he walked over to sit next to you.

You glanced over and straightened your posture nervously. "Oh, I just... My best friend isn't here and I'm starting to get sort of worried." You shrugged.

Oh, no. This wasn't part of the plan.

"Well, I'm sure he's fine, maybe he just..." Miles trailed off.

"Maybe he just didn't wanna come?" You suggested.

"No! No! I wasn't saying that! I mean, maybe he's just busy."

"Yeah, but he would've texted me if something came up." You shook your head.

Miles was panicking. Spiderman was at your party! That was supposed to make you happy! He didn't think you'd get sad about his absence.

"Well, I'm sure he's got a good reason for not being here." Miles said. "He definitely didn't just ditch you because... I mean, this party is awesome. And you're awesome... I mean, you seem awesome. From what I've seen." He was supposed to keep talking to a minimum. What was he doing?!

"You're probably right. I just wish he could be here, y'know?"

"I'm sure Miles wishes he could be here right now too."

"Yeah." You paused. "Wait, how'd you know his name?"

"Uh-"

"And how do you know my best friend's a 'he'?"

"Well, obviously-"

"Why'd you even come to my party in the first place?"

Well, shit. Miles didn't know how to talk his way out of this.

"I... Um..." You looked at his with narrowed eyes. "Alright, don't freak out, but... I..." He took off his mask. "It's me. I'm Spiderman."

Your jaw dropped.

...

"Please, say something." Miles said.

"Are you kidding me?!" You laughed. "You're- You?! How did I never figure it out?!"

"Cause I was good at hiding it?"

"Why did you come to the party like this?"

"Cause I know you love Spiderman, and I know you've wanted to meet him, and I wanted to make you happy!" Miles says. "But, I... I didn't think you'd get sad about me not being here. Me as in Miles." He said.

You paused. "You know, you didn't need to do the whole Spiderman thing for me."

"Yeah... But, I did." He shrugged.

"Why, though?"

"Cause I like you."

"What?"

Oh, God. This was like a nightmare. Whatever, no going back now.

"I like you." He repeated. "Like, not just in a platonic way."

"Oh."

...

"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have-" He began.

"No, no! I like you too!" You quickly reassured as you chuckled. "I was just surprised."

Miles was surprised for a moment, but then he smiled in relief. "That's cool."

"Yeah." You rested your head on his shoulder. "It's cool." The two of you sat in a comfortable silence for a moment. "Thanks for coming, man."

"You saying that to Miles or to Spiderman?" He teased.

"Shut up." You chuckled.

This was a nice birthday gift.

#miles morales x reader #Spiderman x reader #spiderman into the spiderverse x reader #spiderman across the spiderverse x reader #x reader #fanfiction

[from-izzy]

i'm home | tbz lee sangyeon

» ​PAIRING: tbz lee sangyeon x gn!reader (please tell me if i made a mistake!)​ » TROPE/AU​: established relationship au!, long-distance relationship au!, non-idol au! » GENRE​: loving boyfriend sangyeon, very supportive sangyeon, fluffy fluff, bit of angst (ok, maybe more than a 'bit'), comfort comfort and...comfort, reading blushes cause of sangyeon (hehe), boyfie sangyeon who's taller so that you can comfortably hide your face to his chest » WORD COUNT: 4625 » ESTIMATED READING TIME: ~17 mins » WARNINGS (lmk if i missed anything!): mention of religion once, proofread once, workplace hardships navi/masterlist!! 🤍 part of 'especially to you...'

i was a little bit nervous about posting this, especially since it was very rushed! sorry, i didn't plan this well 🥹 nothing came up till the last minute 😞 def didn't freak out or anything— 🤠 i'm gonna hype myself up and think this is fine considering i was racing against the clock (which i didn't manage to beat 😞) and have study to do (exams who? nov 9 who?).

but first of all to me: i know you rejected a lot of opportunities, drowned yourself in a lot of regrets, and i understand that planes are scary for you. i hope that you will find a reason soon to finally see the world like your younger self was dying to do. you were so close to doing it in july and i'm so proud of that first step. keep going, okay?

and! to you @winterchimez...i don't think there are any words needed. welcome home, soulmate! 🫂

Nothing will ever feel as much at home to you as Sangyeon could ever be.

You knew this the moment you told him about how you got the opportunity to work overseas. You remember when it felt like you were fighting endlessly with yourself. Around two years ago, after your weekly date, a loving kiss on your lips and the way Sangyeon would flash you that endearing smile, you thought that everything would be fine. You pushed, what you thought, to be a slim chance that you would be able to work overseas to the back of your mind. At first, you felt crushed about the video interview that you messed up, stuttering and using filler words while you internally scolded yourself for not preparing answers to simple job interview questions. Your head was overloaded with information between things to say and not to say, what would be the best answer and how to play your cards right. In the end, as soon as you pressed the red button on the video call interview, you reached out for your phone to call the first person on your call logs.

Sangyeon remembers that video call, the line of tears cascading down your cheeks as you vent your feelings out. He always waited for you to finish your sentences, nodding along to your words and giving affirming body language to show that he was actively following. Along your stream of words, you didn’t realise that Sangyeon stepped outside in the cold air, his phone at a new low angle and the lights from the buildings were the only reason why you were still able to see his smile across the screen.

“Wait…why are you outside? Where are you going?” You grabbed the new box of tissues from your bedside table, ripping the top part of the box with the dashed lines to help you retrieve a new paper instantly.

“Just grabbing some things.” Sangyeon leisurely answers, bringing the camera closer to his puckering lips, “I’m sure you did amazing, baby. Don’t worry too much, alright? And if you didn’t make it, then I’m sure God has other plans for you.”

You both continue talking over the phone, wiping your eyes, drinking a ton of water and burying yourself underneath the blanket as Sangyeon continues his little errand run. Soon enough, you finally understood why the phone was tilted upwards towards the sky and why Sangyeon didn’t show the things he bought—all the usual things that he would share with you during his random, night errand runs like this one. 

It was when he finally brought the phone up to be in line with his face that you recognised the familiar street background that he was walking in. You gasped, throwing your blanket to the floor, and opening the door suddenly to face your parents who looked at you with shocked eyes. They couldn’t even voice out any of their thoughts because you were out the front door as fast as you exited your bedroom door.

Knowing well that you found out about his plan, Sangyeon made a final sprint for your house, the contents inside the plastic bag ruffles and his earphones your excited laughs and words fill his earphones, mixed in with some of your still sniffling sounds from the devastating earlier events.

That night wasn’t the first time that Sangyeon would run over to you with no notice or hesitation but Sangyeon had been going through a tough time with his personal life and you didn’t know that he would still be able to have such energy to take care of you. It’s a miracle that you were able to still go on dates that these days would be impossible to plan. That night was a reminder to you, especially with the way that he lowered his lower body down, wrapped his arms around your waist, and lifted you as he buried his face into the crook of your neck, that you really love your boyfriend and that he has always been your number one supporter.

In his arms, with some final tears that Sangyeon wiped away delicately from your still-red cheeks, you were sure that everything would be fine. 

Your tears started because you were stressed but it ended with comfort.

But you got another huge headache about a week later when you got the final results of the interview. It could be the acceptance letter (that you were still sure you weren’t going to get), but you knew that you needed to at least open it, read it and accept whatever result it was to move on with your life. So, you tapped on the notification without much thought and you will forever remember this sentence: We look forward to working with you. You froze then and there, your jaw open in disbelief and your fingers went back to the main email page, pulling the inbox page down to refresh the screen. Lo and behold, you were faced with a challenge that you didn’t bother to think about.

You sprint to Sangyeon’s house as soon as the reality sinks into you. Once again, you left your parent’s house after breaking the news to the owners before leaving. Usually, you would have never been able to run that fast and long without a break. The adrenaline and anxiety took over your whole body, and you let your legs guide you to your boyfriend’s house. 

Sangyeon welcomed the news with open arms, his feet adorably tapping on the spot and a deep, soft kiss on your lips that still held his radiant smile. But unlike him, you could only stand at your spot in front of his house and give him a reluctant smile. To this, his smile drops and so did the arms that were in the air a moment ago to celebrate this new journey of yours. The vertical lines between his eyebrows made itself evident and you could only respond with a series of head-shaking and quivering lips.

“Hey…” He cradles the back of your head with one hand, the other on your cheek as he steps forwards towards you, “What’s wrong? You’ve always wanted this.”

Your arms surrounded Sangyeon’s lower body tightly, taking a handful of his sweater and your cold nose slowly became warmer thanks to his body temperature, “I know. But now that it’s happening, I’m having second thoughts.”

He continues to dig further into your thoughts, wanting to understand your feelings more and why you were having second thoughts about something you worked so hard for, “Do you want to elaborate further now? Or do you want to come inside first?”

“If I say the latter, will you cuddle with me?”

This is the you that he knows: the one that would always wish for a kiss, then a cuddle and then another kiss. You lift your face from his chest, increasing the distance between you both slightly. Sangyeon sees the sparkle in your eyes and the slight pout on your lips when you look up at him with a silent plea for a positive answer to your question. 

Who was he to refuse and break your heart like that? 

Plus…he wanted to cuddle with you as much as you did.

And so with the support of your loving family, chaotic friends and encouraging boyfriend, you packed up, headed onto the new country alone and started a new, independent life. Thankfully, you were able to find a place close to your workplace and the foreign place became your home quickly with your three kind housemates. Splitting the chores around the house, cooking, and establishing times to use the washing machine was never a problem. Living in the same house made it easier for you all to spend some time and get to know each other better, leading to routine Friday nights to be spent with each other, going on road trips and eventually overseas trips.

Your workplace has been rewarding as you found the same good qualities of your housemates in most of your co-workers. From day one, everyone has welcomed you to their lives with open arms and you knew for sure that these people wouldn’t be the reason that you would ever have to leave to go back home.

“It’s just so unfair.” It was the company, the workplace and the conditions that they put you in. The logic didn’t make sense: the place was understaffed yet they won’t hire any new people. Of course, there were many underlying factors around it, but after being so overworked, adapting to the new culture, being homesick and, your body trying its best to adjust to the new season changes that you would never have to deal with back home, it was inevitable that you were going to break down soon, “Why? Just why do they have to do that?”

“I’m so sorry you’re going through that.” Oh how much Sangyeon just wanted to jump out of the screen and hug you tight. When was the last time he ever got to do that anyway? He missed having you in his reach—his favourite love language not being able to be expressed for about half a year now, “Hang in there, baby. I know you can do this. Stay strong, hm?”

Through your blurred vision, you could still make out his sorrowful smile, his hand that just hovers the top of the camera on his phone as if to recreate the feeling that he was touching the side of your head.

Perhaps, the worst part of being away from home is your inability to ever interact with them in real-time. The time difference made it too exhausting for everyone on the other side of the world to communicate with you properly. Sure, there were rare days when they could, but the way their moon would rise when the sun said its greetings here made you swallow down your tears at night, forcing you to reassure yourself that ‘everything is going to be fine.’ Because of this, it was a routine for you to drown in your thoughts throughout the day, waking up with a heavy head and heart from the previous nights as you plaster on a weak but still genuine smile when you greet your coworkers. 

With the help of your housemates, your family and Sangyeon have managed to surprise you on both of your birthdays as well as some gaps between their schedules. Those memories would be the ones you would replay in your head as you cry your heart out in the middle of the bed that’s in the middle of the room, in the middle of the night.

Other than the visits and calls, the only things that would connect you to them are the daily pictures and videos. At the very least, they captured the lives of the ones you love back home. Unlike the memories that you could only see and keep for yourself, the physical evidence of their smiles is another big source of comfort for you, especially when all you wanted during your lonely walk home was just life updates from the people that you love most. Somewhere along the way though, the pictures and videos became too much for you, and you start to imagine what the picture would be like if you filled up the negative space within it. 

How would it be like to share that laughter, smile and experience of the atmosphere that the picture manages to capture? What was the air around there like? Humid? Cold? Warm? Aromatic? Or maybe perhaps, would you have been too entranced by Sangyeon’s presence that the only thing you could smell was his signature perfume mixed in with his laundry detergent? 

How would it feel just to have Sangyeon’s shoulder pressed up against yours whenever he has that habit of putting an arm around your back to grab the opposite side of your waist? To have his bigger hand securely intertwine with yours? To have him press a kiss on the side of your head after he whispers ‘I love you forever’ to your ears—knowing well that you were the only one in the world that he would ever confess that phrase intimately to.

How would it feel like to just have the familiar buildings of your neighbourhood, your city and the familiar murals or paintings in your life again? Would it be more comforting than the pictures of the same scenery on your phone? Would your heart be more at ease walking in the night even if all the lights were off or there were no signs of life?

As an answer to your thoughts, after two years of learning, gaining life experiences and missing the air of your home, you bravely decided not to pick up the pen on the table and sign your initials on the new contract paper. 

You decided: I’m going home. 

It’s been a really wild ride. A ride that you would never exchange for anything else. For one, you made friends from the other side of the world. Friends that you knew you could always hit up and visit if you ever come back. Two, it was real when people say that ‘the distance makes the heart grow fonder’. Sangyeon has always been the boyfriend who would cry and carry his burden alone but would always welcome your hardships into his life. Before, even though you could pick up some of the signs on some occasions, the limited video calls allowed you both to pour your feelings out, exchanging confessions and true thoughts. Had you not been across the world, you were confident that Sangyeon would step out of his shell eventually but you were thankful that the distance did its job healthily and your relationship with him strengthened with the tears and chuckles that he showed. 

When the time came and you finished training the new worker who would soon be taking your place in the company, you did your final preparations before stepping out of the house that sheltered you for two years. Final goodbyes, tears being shed, words of affirmation and promises for occasional updates were made before you drove off to the airport. Rolling down the car window, you twist your upper body to face the back of the car, your hand waving up in the air. 

The ride to the airport is bittersweet. You put your phone down after texting Sangyeon that you would call him when you pass through security. All you wanted to do at this moment was to look out the windows and take in the colours of the journey, half-scared that the scenery might turn monochrome soon if you didn’t pay close attention.

Keeping your promise, you connected your earphones and turned on your camera to be faced with Sangyeon leisurely lying in bed, one hand on the back of his head on the headboard, blinking his eyes to fight the sleep from his system.

“You should sleep.” 

Sangyeon shakes his head, straightening his back and sitting up. He takes a deep breath, his chest expanding in volume as he does so, “You only have a few minutes before you have to go anyway. I can stay awake and accompany you.”

“You’re the best, you know that?” 

Thankfully, you found a seat for yourself in the busy atmosphere. You place your backpack on the floor in front of you between your legs, being mindful of the other passengers in the busy airport who most probably had a long day before this, now having to spend overnight in a metal column.

“Love that hoodie on you. Where’d you get it?” Sangyeon wiggles his eyebrows playfully and you roll your eyes, “Good to know that you didn’t leave it behind.”

“I would be crazy to leave this behind.” You pull on the strings of the hoodie, fastening the circumference of the hood around the outline of your face, pouting cutely to your boyfriend who just laughs at you fondly.

“Can’t wait to hold you.” That sentence holds so many meanings and tugged on your heartstrings so much. It hurt for a bit to hear him say that, especially when his voice sounded so tired, “I love you so much.”

“I love you so much.” You whisper to the microphone, holding the tears that you didn’t want to show to your friends throughout the whole week, “I miss you so much. I can’t wait to go on physical, real-life dates again.”

“A few more hours.” He reminds the both of you, holding on just a little bit longer, “Everything will sort itself out then.”

That’s right.

A few more hours until you will both be able to be in the same space again. Just a little bit more before you’ll be able to steal a kiss from his lips whenever and wherever. 

You can’t wait to be back in the comfort of your bed, saying ‘goodnight’ to your parents and slipping out of your windows shortly after to meet Sangyeon at the convenience store. 

You can’t wait to spend some time with his mum—who he gets very jealous of sometimes—and steal more childhood, baby pictures of him. Along with that, you can’t wait for his mum to let you sneak into his room to steal some of his clothes. 

You can’t wait to see his blushing face as he freezes between the doorframe when his eyes land on how his sleeves would completely cover your arms, and your thighs and expose a little bit of your shoulders. 

You can’t wait for him to scoop you up in his strong arms, eliciting your series of squeals and giggles that he has fallen deeply in love with. 

You can’t wait for him to tuck you in bed, pulling his blanket up to your chin. He would then frame his larger body over yours throughout the night, making you sleep deeper and better. But your night, wouldn’t be complete until you delicately kiss him on his chin, cheek and lips. His night wouldn’t be complete either until he kissed your forehead, nose and lips, taking his sweet time on the last body part. 

Most importantly, the night wouldn’t be complete overall until your lips part each other and exchange ‘I love you’s.

As soon as you landed, the adrenaline of finally being in the same country, the same land, the same building knocked out the jetlag and you were suddenly wide awake. You felt a bit bad for the bottom of the seat in front of you and your backpack which was violently ripped out from its peace, but you would like to think that they would understand your sudden burst of energy. You race and slip yourself between the bodies of people who were most probably confused and amazed by how much your eyes were darting around the conveyor belt so quickly, trying to find your check-in baggage—but you didn’t care.

You care about is Lee Sangyeon.

Now, you passed through every security check, every random bag inspection, opening and relocking up all your luggage again one by one, your patience running out by the minute.

But it’s okay.

Because now, only one glass door stands in the way between you and all the people waiting on the other side. 

You watch from the distance as the automatic door opens and closes through other passengers. You were even able to catch a glimpse of some of your fellow flight passengers who spotted their loved ones immediately in the crowd, their hands releasing the handle brake of their trolley when they rushed into the crowd. Their loved ones cry and gasp at the presence that they have been so desperate for, their bodies swaying side to side to keep some of their emotions regulated in public.

Oh, how you know you wouldn’t be able to hold in your tears.

Exhaling and inhaling a couple more times, your hands grip the handle of your trolley, doing a final baggage check that everything is securely held in place and that you didn’t leave anything. Finally, you push the handle to release the brake and you start to walk over to the translucent glass doors. 

Time didn’t slow down. 

It just felt still. 

It didn’t stop though—it just felt still.

You could hear your heartbeat through your ears, your palms were sweating in nervousness and you could barely feel the ground that you were walking on with every step of your feet. The gush of wind pushes your hair back dramatically and your eyes water at the cooler air from the other side of the door. Metal barricades separate the arriving passengers from the crowd from both sides of your body and you force your teared-up eyes to carefully scan through the rows of the crowds and the signs that they held up. Your back straightens to accommodate your eyes’ effort in addition to your lips that move in the shape of the name of the person you miss the most. Unfamiliar faces fill your visual field and your feet finally take you to the end of the barricade, heart feeling heavy at the unsuccessful event to pick out anyone in the crowd that you know. 

But then…

“Found you.” 

His appearance explains why you were unable to quickly pick him out from the crowd if you didn’t focus on detail. Sangyeon grins at your shocked facial expression, watching your eyes slowly lift from the bouquet in his hands to the freshly black dye on his hair.

“Y-You—”

“What do you think?” His pointer and thumb raise to twirl a bit of his hair, his eyes still on you, “You always said that I would look good with black hair.”

“Good?” Oh, he knew what kind of effect this is having on you and he’s having fun with this, “Sangyeon, you—” 

His facial expression softens straightaway when the tears that you’ve been holding for so long finally drop to the ground and he strides forwards immediately as soon as he catches a glimpse of your quivering lips. Forget about the flowers, forget about the people around you, forget about how you were standing in the middle of the walkway. He sets his ‘welcome back’ gifts on top of your things, swiftly wrapping an arm behind your shoulders while the other one cups your cheeks. 

Sangyeon held your shaking body against his tightly, and it was good that he did, otherwise, you would surely be on the floor. You relished in the scent that you missed the most, purposely taking in deep breaths to ground yourself back to the present. The boy smiles at the realisation, letting your free cheek cutely rest on his chest. He hushes you softly, the swiping motion of his thumb on your cheek giving you a physical reminder of his presence—a reminder that he is with you at this very moment. Multiple kisses were pressed on your forehead in an attempt to calm you down and responded with a whimper as you tried to form words.

“It’s okay.” It really is, “I’m here. I’m not going anywhere.”

Your body responded to his affirmation, your arms finally wrapping around his waist, the tips of his fingers just barely intertwining behind his back. Your palms lay flat on his smooth leather jacket and your ragged breathing found a stable pace once again. The increased oxygen in your blood allows you to finally feel Sangyeon’s plump lips on your forehead and the blush begins to form across your cheekbones. 

“You’re really here.”

“I am.” You feel the way his chest vibrates at his deep chuckle. 

That’s all he said and it’s way more than enough. Eyes closed, in Sangyeon’s embrace, his familiar scent, his lips hovering on your eyelids to press kisses there—everything is starting to feel like home.

“You look handsome.” For the first time since you arrived, you finally look at this new hair colour properly. Your eyebrows furrow, almost a look of dissatisfaction and disapproval, “Too handsome.” This time, one of your eyebrows raised at the way he responded with a teasing smile, “How many people asked you out already?”

“Honestly,” He starts to act, tightly closing his eyes as if to think very hard. He prolonged his hum with the way you glared at him cutely, wanting to tease you for longer, “quite a lot.”

The answer made you scoff, tilting your head away and you started to pull away from his embrace. Sangyeon didn’t let you walk away fully though for he pulled you right back to his body. Your hands attempt to stabilise your body the sudden act by resting on the curves of Sangyeon’s shoulders. The playful look in his eyes disappears and the extra layer of moisture shows itself—it tells you that he has been waiting for the only person to ever see his tears to be within his arms again. Both his hands rest on your waist and your own eyes search for the emotions behind his, a hand wiping his lower eyelid. That act makes a tear fall before another one falls and it soon becomes a fountain of emotions for the older male.

“I missed you. So much.” The way that Sangyeon puts so much emphasis on the second and fourth words sent chills down your spine.

Your hand on his shoulder slides upwards to cup his face, the other downwards to do the same on the other side. With all the strength you have left in your legs, you put your weight on your toes, fluttering your eyelids close and lifting your body to press a longing kiss to his lips. You tasted his tears on the curves on his lips, but knowing well that it stemmed from love, made your heart slowly start to heal. Sangyeon reciprocates immediately, travelling his hands to the side curves of your body, stopping at your neck, gently tilting your face upwards to deepen the kiss. The kiss sweetly alternates with his own hugging your bottom lips, pulling away for oxygen, a little ‘I love you’ and diving back in to hug your upper lips.

This is what home feels like.

It’s not some building or some land that could be pointed out on a map. It’s not necessarily the photos and videos that you received, even though they comforted you on cold nights. It’s not necessarily the rushed talks and recounts of your lives because the second hand on the clock mocked the little time you would always have, even though you were thankful that you had that small gap to do so.

It’s actually experiencing all of the above, going through all those trials, all those confusing emotions, and still feeling love and support. It’s being able to just walk with defeat over the day’s work but as soon as you arrive back home, the feeling either washes away or you’re able to just vent it and cry it out. 

With the right people, you were able to let these experiences turn into lessons and precious memories—similar to how there are specific bricks to build the proper structure of a house. As those experiences build, so does the clear image and structure of a house. Sure, houses break down due to inside and outside factors but when it does, you’re confident that you can work it out and make it stronger. 

With those thoughts in mind, the corner of your lips tugged upwards and no words were needed for Sangyeon to know that the smile wasn’t mischievous, teasing or playful.

It’s one full of relief and happiness.

“Welcome home.” Sangyeon changes his words between your kisses.

You hum, waiting for the next time he pulls away to give a proper response.

“I’m home.”

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