Tumgik
#one of my aunts is contesting my grandma's will and the person who is getting fucked over the most is my dad
layla-carstairs · 1 year
Text
.
#I can't sleep rn because of family drama I found out today 🧍🏻‍♀️#one of my aunts is contesting my grandma's will and the person who is getting fucked over the most is my dad#she wants a share in our family farm despite never giving a shit & my dad being the only one who loves farming#might never see two of my aunts again 🤪#one of them into qanon and stuff so it's not a huge loss but still#also potentially some of my cousins? idk qanon aunt has 7 kids but they're all adults now#some of them I will very surprised (& heartbroken) if they take their mom's side but idk idk#also the whole thing is stupid she apparently requested my grandpa will too like. that man has been dead since before I was born 😐#there's no way you're going to be to contest that#also shockingly oldest aunt is on our side (dad and Uncle). she once told my grandma to stop spending their inheritance so 🥴#my dad's side of my family is crazy I surprised they've made it this long without a rift#my grandparents literally tried to pay off my one aunts boyfriend lmao#same aunt who's contesting the will btw#she has issues ngl my grandparents didn't name her for weeks bc they wanted a boy 🙃#but like she's 60 now & has a phd in psychology & her parents are dead! very very dead!#and she's taking it out on her brothers so#she's been trying to do this for years & told my mom as much when my dad was hospital 🧍🏻‍♀️#also other qanon aunt is backing her up and she's got issues too#when her partner died she made their FOURTEEN YEAR OLD son the next of kin#my cousin had his dad autopsy addressed to him at 14 let that sink in#my grandma ended up organising and funding the whole funeral pretty much because my aunt refuse to do any of it because she was made at him🙃#they had seven kids & she nearly didn't go to the funeral#it was really traumatic for them (obviously) and she made it worse. my cousin was handed the Irish flag at 11 w/o being told#my mom had to take him away bc how obviously broken he was#I should stop talking about this now#I might delete this later idk#bella talks
2 notes · View notes
artzychic27 · 3 years
Text
In honor of the glorious pride month (Coming up soon), please enjoy these Miraculous Pride Headcanons!
Inspired by this post by @transvoltronhc
You a TERF? Fuck off, beeyatch!
Marinette- The Pan Trans Queen we all Need 🏳️‍⚧️
She/Her- Pansexual/Polyamorous
Every time Marinette inhales, a terf gets punched
Every time Marinette exhales, a trans kid gets a flag
She and Nathaniel supply the face paint
She’s very vocal at pride and gets super violent with protesters
Marinette: *Punching protester while her friends cheer* I don’t wanna see your disgusting face here ever again, you filthy pig! Same goes for the rest of you!
Terfs go to protest, walk away covered in bruises and with a tiny crush on the bluenette
Got into a muscle-flexing contest and won first
Dyed her hair the colors of the pan flag and walks around with a brightly colored, bedazzled trans flag cape
Supplies juice boxes and cookies for the pride kids
She and Marc pass out colorful binders, flower crowns, and starter makeup kits
Drag Queens and Kings LOVE her and are always giving her hugs whenever she walks by / She’s even been commissioned by them to make outfits for their next shows. The audience loved them
Alya- The Badass Pansexual Pirate 🏴‍☠️
She/Her but is not opposed to They/Them
Actually has dressed like a pirate with a sword the colors of her flag. Anarka was so proud
Will punch TERFs with their Pan bestie any day
Ships random people
Leaves many girls swooning as she walks by in her thigh high leather boots
Alya: Sorry ladies, I’m spoken for. *Kisses Nino*
No one dares to flirt with her because she’s out of everyone’s league
One protester made a transphobic comment about Nino, and Alya immediately hit em with a frying Pan
The chaotic aunt of pride
Death drops are flawless!
Hands out phone cases they painted the colors of different pride flags
Born This Way is her anthem
Has many pride-themed superhero tank-tops ‘Super Gay 4 Super Girl’ ‘I’m Bi Man’ ‘Deadpool was at Stonewall’
Nino- The Insanely Cool Bi Trans Guy 😎🏳️‍⚧️
He/Him
Marinette made him a bedazzled cape so they could match
Mari and Kim’s brother in Transness
Dresses in hoodies no matter how hot it is
One of the mom friends. / Everyone wants to be adopted by him. / He once put everyone on baby leashes so they wouldn’t wander off
Everyone refers to him as “Trans DJ Jesus” because he wore sandals with a long curly wig one time. (To this day, no one knows why he did it)
Takes a five-minute break to Vogue with the drag queens
Supplies the music while skateboarding. He blasts every gay national anthem known to humankind
Alya, Adrien, Marinette, and Kim are very protective of him. Once, a TERF pushed him to the ground. Alya, Marinette, and Kim beat up the TERF while Adrien treated his friend to some ice cream
Adrien- Shit! We lost the baby! 🏳️‍🌈😱
He/Him & She/Her- Bigender/Bisexual/Polyamorous
Can��t stop, won’t stop wandering off because he’s never been to a Pride parade before
He was surprised at how accepting his father was. Although, it probably had something to do with Nathalie and Gorilla threatening to expose him as Hawkmoth if he didn’t let Adrien go
The class goes ballistic whenever she goes missing and will interrogate anyone
Myléne: *Interrogating a drag queen* Are you hiding him in your wig?! / Marinette: Get her out! She’s so frail! Her dad doesn’t feed her! / Nino: Found him! He was getting ice cream. / Myléne: ... You are free to go.
Nino has to put him on a baby leash every time
Drinks the most juice boxes and eats the most ice cream
Can’t tell when he’s being flirted with / Rando: Hey, cutie. / Adrien: ... My name is Adrien.
Bigender legwarmers, bracelets, and headbands
Dresses in pastels every year, and people just wanna hug him / He's happy to oblige and will hug anyone / Vows to hug the hate out of protesters
Every time Adrien smiles or laughs, a transgender child is accepted by friends and family and then gets a flower crown
Keeps getting asked if she and Marinette are dating. / Adrien: No, we’re just shopping buddies. (Secretly wishes for more)
A girl once asked if he was Cinderella when he wore a blue headband, and he immediately said yes. Now every week for Pride month, she dresses as a different Disney Princess
Nearly fainted when Marinette and Luka entered a flexing contest and Luka’s sleeves tore
Kim- Mari and Nino’s Bi brother in Trans Pride🏳️‍⚧️
He/Him & They/Them- Gender nonconforming
Kim: I’m a guy, I like blouses and heels, deal with it, people!
Kim/Mari/Nino: Bedazzled Cape Squad!
Muscle shirts and converse sneakers / Has a tank top that reads, ‘I flexed so hard the sleeves came off’
Got into a muscle-flexing contest against Luka and Marinette and got third place (No one beats Marinette)
Also can’t tell when they’re being flirted with
Alix and Max convinced him to dress in drag, and he went all out. Now he has the respect of many drag queens. And every pride parade, he wears heels and a huge wig
Gives everyone (Mainly Max) piggyback rides
Asked Max to be his boyfriend at one pride parade, and people thought it was so cute! They named that day, ‘Kimax Day’
Max- Not a Robot, I’m Agender 🤖
They/Them
Has many pride tank-tops and pins with puns / ‘Error 404 Gender Not Found’ ‘I Don’t Speak Binary Code’ ‘2/3 of the Invisible Trio’
Has Marinette paint their cheeks the colors of the agender and asexual flags
Has one of those digital backpacks with pixelated images on the front
Downloads Pride songs for Markov to blasts from their speakers
When they and Alix convinced Kim to dress in drag, Max may or may not have drooled a bit
Progress Pride Flag cape, socks, and nails
When protestors attack, Max goes all LGBT scientist on their butts, explaining the difference between gender and sex, what hormone blockers actually do, and how not every gay person has AIDS
Once beat up a sleazy protester for... Feeling Kim down there / Max: *Hitting protester with a baseball bat* If you ever do that again, I will fit Markov with a laser and have them slice your rotten dick off!
Marinette and Nathaniel helped them make pride bracelets with the sexualities and gender identities written in binary code. The pride nerds LOVED them
Nathaniel: Our Beautiful BiRomantic Son 🎨
He/Him
He and Marinette paint everyone’s faces before every pride parade
Painted an asexual heart on his Bi flag and wore it as a cape
Cuffed jeans, boots, tucked-in shirt, beanie, pride buttons / Paints pride flags on his denim jacket and shorts
Marc does his makeup, and he looks fabulous
His grandma teaches him how to fight in case of violent Christian protesters / Grandma: Sweetie, you’re Jewish and Bisexual, the world is gonna tear you apart. Learn how to give a mean left hook.
Once took over a face painting booth, now he does it every Pride Month
Enters the 'Crush a watermelon between your thighs' contest every time and always wins first
Saw couples cosplaying as Mightillustrator and Inverser, and cried tears of joy
He and Marc cosplay as couples at every pride parade. The fan favorites are Keith and Lance, Tweek and Craig, and Michael and Rich
CANNOT have too much sugar or he goes crazy and wakes up with no memories of what he did
The next day after an intense sugar high, people were saluting as he walked by and calling him ‘General of the Bisexual Battalion’ / He’s not complaining or questioning it / He has an army now and will one day take over all of Europe. Then the world.
Marc: The Rainbow Flag has Taken a Human Form🏳️‍🌈
Nonbinary- He/Him & They/Them
A True Pride Legend
Born on June 1st at a pride parade.
A singer helped deliver him, his cord was cut by a sword Lesbian, he was swaddled in a drag queen’s glitter cape, and their name was thought of by a drag king
This moment was so beautiful that many protesters cried and decided to join the parade
Everyone will literally stop what they’re doing just to get a picture with them / Everyone loves Marc!
Got into a splits contest and won
Makes flower crowns and knits rainbow flag scarves to pass out to everyone
Certified Mom Friend
Does everyone's makeup
Loses his shit when his shorter friends get lost in crowds
Hugs pride kids who were forced to sneak out or were kicked out of their homes then buys them ice cream / He and Nathaniel have adopted over fifty Pride kids who were kicked out of their homes
Joins Adrien in dressing like a Disney Princess. He SLAYED as Snow White
It may not seem like it, but Marc can throw a punch and fight with one hand right behind their back
Beat up a transphobic asshole for trying to “correct” a trans boy by forcing himself onto him. / They never did find the man’s body. In fact, all of his personal information was gone. Almost like he had never even existed... / Marc looks cute, but he can be terrifying when he needs to be
Alix: Two Out of 3 💚💜🖤🤍
She/Her & They/Them
Leaves many girls swooning as they skate by
Devious little shit
She doesn’t beat up protesters like her classmates. She pranks them until they cry / One year, they all ended up covered in rainbow glitter and pink feathers / Adrien and Rose help them make glitter bombs to throw at protesters, then they run away giggling
Wears sarcastic Pride shirts and black shorts with her roller skates
She and Jalil come out to their father every June
Alix: Father. I am AroAce! / Jalil: Also, I am gay! / Alim: Kids, I know. You’ve been doing this every year. / Jalil: Well... Thank you for being an ally!
This is the only time she’ll wear makeup / She wears it like war paint. Only it’s rainbow
Drinks the most juice out of everyone
Ships people with Alya. SHIPPING BUDS!
Myléne: Smol Asexual Bean ♠️
She/Her
Goes all out for Pride Month / Rolls around in glitter with Rose and Sabrina before every parade
Dyes her hair all rainbow / Wears a ‘Shakespeare was Here’ shirt with her asexual flag skirt
Has also beaten up homophobes and transphobes
Is the most vocal when it comes to putting those assholes in their place. Ivan has to hold her back sometimes
After an acephobe after they made certain comments (You ace folk know what I’m talkin ‘bout) She roundhouse kicked them / Every protester knows not to mess with the bohemian girl
Will blast The PROM soundtrack at max volume from her phone
Cosplays as musical characters. Veronica Sawyer was a fan favorite
Part of the “Where the Hell is Adrien?” Squad
Ivan: My Girlfriend is Stronger than Me, and it’s So Hot 💪😍
Prefers He/Him but is cool with other pronouns - Questioning his gender so isn’t using any labels right now
The responsible auncle
Mari and Alya’s partner in Pansexuality/ He can’t help if everyone is attractive, he just can’t!
Looks like he can kill you, but is actually a cinnamon role. Myléne on the other hand...
Has let Marc do their makeup and nails, and looks gorgeous!
Did drag. Slayed. Rocks those three-inch heels.
Tank tops and shorts club
Like Marinette, no one dares to flirt with him. Not because he’s out of their league, but because they’re scared of his girlfriend
Dyes his blonde tuft pastel pink every year
More pacifistic than her friends are when it comes to protesters, but if the right buttons are pressed, hell shall be raised
They join Alya and Alix in shipping random people
Rose: The Lovely Lipstick Lesbian💄
She/Her- Breaking lesbian stereotypes est. 2004
The kind aunt who supports all of her niblings
Has been going to pride with her dads since she was born/ One of her dads is a retired drag queen
Wears her rainbow fairy wings every year
Has a lesbian flag with dozens of girls' phone numbers written on it. / Doesn’t wear it anymore now that she has Juleka
Throws fistfuls of glitter at protesters and yells at them, “LIGHTEN UP!”
Sprinkles glitter on pride kids and tells them to sparkle
Marinette helps her make rainbow unicorn plushies to hand out to children every year
Dresses as Disney Princesses with Adrien and Marc. Princess Squad!
Bakes cookies to pass around
Drag Kings and Queens love this girl! She’s cute, loud, and carries glitter everywhere
Butch lesbians learn not to flirt with her after their encounter with Juleka
To piss of protesters, she dipped Juleka and kissed her for ten whole seconds / Rose: I bet your husbands don’t love you like that. / Drag Queens: BUUUUUURN!
Juleka: The Gay Witch 🖤🏳️‍🌈
She/Her & They/Them - Total lesbian
Was there when Marc was born, and will never forget that day. (She has an impressive memory, even as a baby)
They swore they saw a rainbow when he was born
Dresses as a witch and wears red eye contacts to every pride event so she freaks out protesters
Has actually cursed them / They just bought the spellbook off of Amazon
Carries around a rainbow parasol
Carries Rose under every threshold she comes across
Is a lot louder at pride events than on regular days
She actually sang Girls Like Girls up on stage, and everyone went wild
Sometimes wears suits
When they saw Rose being flirted with by some butch lesbians, they went ballistic / Now the butch lesbians are terrified of her forever
She and Luka help out with painting her friends’ nails and dying their hair
Dyes her hair rainbow every pride month
Luka: The Responsible Hot & Chaotic Auncle 💖💚💙
Agender- They/Them, He/Him, She/Her - Polysexual/Polyamorous
“For me, gender is like silence... I’m just not into it.”
Doesn’t really care what pronouns people use for him
Wears dresses to every pride parade. Anarka and Juleka have never been so proud
Is always doing drag cosplay. Marc and Nathaniel have never been so proud / They had people gawking when they did Jessica Rabbit cosplay
Purposely bends over in front of people, while wearing leggings, skirts, skinny jeans, or short shorts. Marinette, Kagami, and Adrien got nosebleeds
Marinette/Kagami/Adrien: Luka's ass in those shorts is a Godsend.
Dyes her hair rainbow every pride parade
The minute June starts, they’ll get up in the morning, grab their Polysexual flag, and just run around the city
Has been coming up with Pride songs to sing at protesters. Many of the songs insult them. / Luka: Okay! This one goes out to the trash behind barriers, it’s called, “Please shut the fuck up, you homophobic dildos!”
Got into a flexing contest and won second, but at the cost of their sequined sleeves
Asked Adrien, Marinette, and Kagami to be his significant others at a pride event. They all said yes
Has carried Adrien and Marinette on her biceps, and Kagami on her shoulders
Adrien: ... I marrying them first. / Marinette: Get in the back of the line, blonde wonder! / Kagami: Both of you move to the back.
Kagami: While You Were Busy Being Hetero, I Studied the Blade 🗡
She/Her - PanRomantic/Polyamorous
Surprisingly, her mother was very supportive. She even bought Kagami a rainbow sword / Turns out, Tamoe had a few flings herself. 😉
Kagami came out to the whole fencing team by wearing a pansexual-flag print fencing mask. Adrien squealed all through practice
She didn’t quite understand what polyamory meant and was confused as to why she had crushes on Adrien, Marinette, and Luka at the same time
After a bit of explaining and reassuring her that it was totally normal and not being disloyal to a partner, Kagami came to terms with being polyamorous
Tamoe allowed Kagami to go to her first Pride Parade. On the condition that she take her sword to ward off protesters
She was so overwhelmed and wasn’t entirely sure what to do until she found Marinette, Luka, and Adrien in the crowd with their friends
The four of them hung out together and got closer
Believes Adrien in pastels is one of the purest things on Earth
When Marinette and Luka entered the flexing contest, Kagami had to keep Adrien and herself from fainting
When Luka asked her, Marinette, and Adrien to be his significant others she tried to resist the urge to jump and squeal, but couldn’t hold it in
Likes it when Marinette wraps her trans flag around her. It’s so warm
Chased off a protester and TERF with her sword. They said some shit about Marinette being ‘fake’, Luka being ‘greedy’, and Adrien being a ‘pansy’, and she just snapped / While screaming in rapid Japanese, she chased about fifty protesters away. Her SOs were so proud.
Sabrina: The Ginger Gent 👑🏳️‍🌈
She/Her, He/Him in Drag- PanRomantic
Rolls around in glitter, as is a Drag tradition
Dresses in drag. / The Ginger Gent is her drag king name and she’s got like a glam rocker theme going on
Sequined leather jacket, coiffed toupee, glitter makeup
Started doing drag when she was twelve. Her dad supported her wholeheartedly and even entered her in junior drag contests. She took first place three times
Sometimes puts on private drag shows for Chloé. (Nothing weird!)
Marinette helps makes most of her costumes
Luka’s partner in Drag / Together, they kick ass and still look glamorous
A makeup expert (Next to Marc)
Roger taught her self defense / If you're going to Pride, learn to fight
Has taken down thirty protesters, his hair still looks awesome, and there's not a sequin out of place.
Chloé: The Badass Polysexual Demigirl 💖💚💙
She/Her and They/Them
Not really that attracted to guys
Best dressed. / Marc/Luka/Sabrina: She wishes!
Only allows Marc to do their makeup, no one else!
She has her own float in the parade / She passes out rainbow boas
Taking names and kicking butt
Has actually choked a protester with their flag and they don't do a thing about it since they're the mayor's child
Chloe: It pays to have political power. / Marinette: In this situation.
Doesn't tell people, but they came to Marinette, Nino, and Kim about gender stuff when they were questioning their identity
The day was spent teaching Chloe about the trans spectrum until she found the gender that felt right to her
Whenever Chloe gets excited, she makes out with the first girl she comes across. / Many young female protesters started questioning things when the blonde's lips grazed against theirs'
254 notes · View notes
royalsunshinehotel · 3 years
Note
I am SO PUMPED to send you the request snd I truly hope you love it too and are inspired to go balls to the wall with it, almost literally 😂🔥
Okay so this request is Sonny x Reader. In this scenario Sunaina and Sonny are either on a break or she left him for Dushal or something 🤷🏻‍♀️ I just don’t want cheating involved
Okay so…scenario is reader’s grandma is staying at the Best Exotic Marigold Hotel and reader originally came to visit grandma (she probably doesn’t have much time left) but ended up wanting to stay longer. Reader gets a job at the hotel helping out and Sonny can’t help but notice her…she confesses she’s got a crush on him one day when they’re in the laundry room which leads to some impromptu hot and heavy making out/groping on the washing machines (feel free to write this part in detail) BUT there’s some sort of emergency/urgent interruption and Sonny has to man the front desk…reader sneaks under the desk because she wants fo finish what they started. After all, she didn’t get to see his beautiful cock as they were rudely interrupted…so she decides to give him a BJ under the desk and Sonny absolutely had to keep his shit together and pretend THAT isn’t happening…..
THANK YOU!!! 💖🔥
"First Time For Everything (18+)" (Sonny Kapoor x Reader)
A/N: Thank you for your patience lovely. I've got some David Copperfield smut coming tomorrow too @catcher11
Tumblr media
On paper, you loved your Grandma.
She’d been good to you when you were young, giving you wonderful memories. She took care of you when your father evaporated from your life, and she was also responsible for your love of art, and your willingness and bravery when it came to trying new things.
But she also happened to be a tormentor of your mother, your aunt, and an uncle you hadn’t seen since you were six. She was the reason these people had as many issues as they did, and as you got older, you became a target as well.
There were typical rants about how you’d never amount to anything, but this wasn’t new. She was definitely not in her right mind, but you were able to shrug these attacks off knowing you were the one person in the family who would still speak to her.
Yeah, you’re a “good person”. Every interaction with her brings you a headache, but you do it anyway, for the sake of the woman who once drew and illustrated an entire children's book from leftover printer paper. “YN of Hawk Hill”
You had to do it for her.
And yet, when you had lost the family-wide rock paper scissors contest, you found that you’d been recruited to escort your grandma to India. You’re a “good person”, yup. That’s why you got suckered into this.
“You were always my favorite!” she had said, like you hadn’t been bullied into this. You had never been on an airplane before.
There’s a first time for everything.
Like most things though, life dealt you something sweet, as if to pay back for your sacrifice.
Sonny Kapoor, and the Best Exotic Marigold Hotel. You were less concerned about the hotel, and more with him.
He was handsome, obviously, but it was his optimism and his kindness that really made staying with your decrepit grandmother bearable.
You had been there for about a month before you said actual words to him. You wanted to ask him about local food, cool spots to hang out, you know...local stuff. And what came out was, “can I have a job? I feel bad not contributing.”
“Ah Americans, always need to be productive. If you feel up to it, I could use help on the front desk?” He suggested, you couldn’t quite look at him then, but you shook your head for yes.
He was too bright, as if you were literally staring into the sun.
“Cool,” and with that you had a position. If not for yourself, to keep away from your Grandmother before you run out of things to talk about.
And it’s a good job too, you get to know the other staff members, you get paid a living wage, and you get to be near him.
You make eye contact eventually, and it’s good. You might even consider him a friend. It’s good banter, he helps with the ‘menial’ tasks even though he’s the boss.
And it’s a routine, you made it all on your own, but early, you and Sonny get up together, and work on the laundry.
The laundry itself is a bit of a mixed bag, but he helps you and the two of you absent-mindely chatter on about nothing. He’s lovely. Of course he is. His brain was marvelous, and he could string seven different topics together before you even finished thinking of one.
But there was always something bubbling beneath the surface. You weren’t shy the way you were when you’d first checked-in. You can look at his face now, you’d even consider him a friend. The heat you felt under your skin when your hands brushed was a little too intense to be ignored any longer.
So one day, at 4:30am, you ask.
When you’d first gotten to the hotel, he’d worn a ring. And now he didn’t. You’d heard whispers from the staff about a Sunaina, and you were just being friendly!
“You broke up six months ago?” You wheezed the words out as you folded a heated towel, and carefully placed it on the pile the two of you had made.
Sonny worked in an impractical way, handing you each linen out of the dryer one-at-a-time. Maybe he wanted to talk more? He was good at that, after all.
“Yes,” Sonny looked stunning in the blue light, not that you were paying close attention of course,” she left me for her brother’s friend.” You winced, as Sonny stuck his head into the washer, fishing out a stray scrap that had gotten stuck in the back.
“Oh wow. And you haven’t rebounded yet?” You scoffed at him in an attempt to sound confident. You weren’t inexperienced but you’d never truly liked someone this much.
“Rebound?” Sonny questioned, groaning as he got out of the washer. Sonny was raised correctly and went through the world like no one would fall to their knees to get their hands on him. Like you weren’t wanting to grab his shoulders and pull him to you.
“Yes, just getting her out of your system. It could be a date, or a kiss, or...more.” With you, he could do that with you. “But it doesn’t have to mean anything, it’s like a palette cleanser.” You just compared him to a meal because you’re going to eat him alive.
“Like gum?” You can’t help but smile at his suggestion. He spoke in such an earnest way, it drove you insane.
“Yes, you're getting your ex unstuck from your system.” You nod, noting how Sonny stared at the rag in his hand as if it was foreign.
“What would one do to get a rebound?” He asked, making your mouth go dry as his long fingers carefully traced the edges of the fabric.
“I suppose, just….make a move.” With you. If he didn’t put his mouth on you in two seconds...
And your wish came true. Softly, slowly, Sonny leaned down and pressed his lips to yours. Only for a moment, and not an ounce of force behind it. Something about him just felt correct.
But just as quickly as he’d pressed his mouth to yours, he’d backed away.
“Oh.” You said softly, giving a small smile to him.
“Did you not mean yourself?” Sonny’s face contorted to a dramatic expression of horror, “Oh no, this is an abuse of power!” He groaned, “I'm a bad boss!”
In a smooth gesture, you grabbed both of his wrists, choosing to ignore the little sparks working their way up your hands, and you brought him right back.
Sonny started by reaching his hands around your waist and lifting you to sit on the top of the dryer, door having slammed shut of course.
Your dark-haired boss sweetly sucked at your bottom lip, as he gripped your thighs and wrapped you around him.
Sunaina was an idiot, and Sonny was relentless, hands everywhere, trying to get as close as possible as quickly as he could.
Your head was buzzing, and you felt teeth tugging at the spot below your neck. You dug your nails into his shoulders, earning a loud-and slightly startling moan.
You couldn’t help but giggle, you really couldn’t. You raked a hand through his thick hair and pulled him away from your throat as he made a dramatic, disappointed expression.
“Do we have to tell HR?” He joked, half-closing his eyes as you ran your hand up his chest.
“I don’t even have a work visa.” You snipe back, as Sonny, pulls you closer, resting his forehead against yours.
He smiled into your mouth, with a kind of softness that didn’t belong to a guest or some new investor. This was a smile only meant for you.
“Mr KAPOOR!!” A shrill voice cut through the courtyard as Sonny groaned into your mouth.
“No.” You tangled a hand in his hair, sticking out your lower lip into a pout. If you could smother Mrs. McClintock you would. It would be an international incident though.
“Mr. KAPOOR!” The voice cut through again, “I’m WAITING.” It was before sunrise and she just shuffled over to the front desk, ringing the bell like she had somewhere to be.
Sonny takes a moment to kiss your lips sweetly, before he pulls away, leaving you sitting on the washing machine alone.
The cold metal of the washer seemed to dig into your skin, but it provided motivation.
You weren’t going to be pushed around. Not this time. You got bullied into coming to this country, you settled for a random job when all you wanted was a date, and now you’re being blocked from - what you felt was- a great fuck by some 90 year old with a sketchy political history.
He’d been towards his hotels since he was 18, and he’d only ever regretted having to handle guests at this exact moment.
You looked so upset when he pulled away. He should have said something.
Sonny smoothed his shirt down and gave Miriam McClintock the most dazzling smile. Why didn’t he tell you to stay put? Why didn’t he tell you all of the disgusting things he’s been wanting to do with you?
Mrs. McClintock was, for lack of a better term, a bitch. But the white noise she provided did give him an ample amount of time to figure out how he felt about you. Maybe it was as simple as you said- a rebound, a palette cleanser, and that was why his first urge was to pin you against the wall and make you his.
But it was more than that. You’d come here for someone you loved, and the way you put your heart into work that you’d barely even wanted.
It’s not a rebound. It’s more. He had to stare at Mrs. McClintock, and let her feel as if she’s being heard. Nothing she was complaining about was anything he had the ability to change, but he was her host. He could be fucking you until your eyes roll back, but he just had to handle this guest first.
“I just feel as if Nixon…” she started, as if the owner and proprietor of the “best exotic marigold hotels” would have any idea who a US president was.
God, he just wanted to be inside you. He could have been with you at that moment, maybe he’d have you on his lap, and have you ride his hand. Sonny always saw how your eyes dilated whenever he picked something up. God. Sonny was grateful for a moment that his hands were so large. All the better to feel you.
“And young man, your shirts are too…” Mrs. McClintock continued as Sonny felt something against his leg. Taking a half-step back, he lowers his eyes to see you, sitting under the desk, on your knees.
On your knees. Oh god.
The object of his affection, the star of his best dreams, underneath the desk. You were biting your lip, and your shirt was buttoned down lower than when he’d last seen you a few moments (or an eternity) ago.
Your soft eyes pull him in, and when you open your perfect mouth, Sonny sees stars dotting over his vision. It’s just too perfect.
Smoothly, as calmly as he could muster, Sunit Kapoor pulled a chair over to the desk, and sat down.
“Oh there, are we comfortable now?” sniped Mrs. McClintock, bouffant hairstyle suddenly seeming more lopsided. If Mrs. McClintock had been less concerned with the skylight in her room, she might have noticed how quickly Sonny leaned back into his chair.
You were grateful, in a way. She’d be talking for a while. You could take your time.
Sonny grins as his eyes go out of focus. You, slowly, as quietly as you could, unzipped his jeans and took his head into your mouth. You couldn’t let yourself be resentful of the old woman because she robbed you of the opportunity to tell Sonny exactly what you thought of his cock.
It was absolutely beautiful, just like the rest of him.
Your mouth was warm, and soft, just like he hoped, and if this was something you wanted to do, he was supposed to facilitate it. He was a host, after all.
Sonny wished he could look down at your pretty face, and watch as you bobbed your head, but all he could do was speculate.
This was months in the making, tucked under his desk, you decided to have fun.
With thin little kitten licks, you started at the angry head of his stiff cock, your hand in a firm grip, giving him a painfully slow tug. Sonny held in a wheeze above the desk, reaching a hand down to grip your hair.
“And the milk isn’t….” her words trailed right through Sonny’s ears as you licked up a notable vein along the side of his cock.
So what if your grandmother was sleeping across the courtyard, a few feet away? You undid a final button and pushed your shirt back as you lazily played with his cock. If Sonny could have looked down, he would have seen your shirt open, nipples hard in the cold air, and a hand resting between your legs, but he couldn’t. Mrs. McClintock needed her air vents cleaned.
“And I really do think that Laila in room 7 is…” you let out a low choking sound as Sonny was suddenly staring very hard at the white dot on Mrs. McClintock’s nose.
You dug a hand into his leg as you steadily opened your throat and took Sonny’s length. It was as if you’d stolen all the breath from his lungs. The old woman noticed the Kapoor boy looked strange, but she just didn’t care.
Sonny was pretty sure he was going to die. The desk wasn’t good to hold onto, and he didn’t want to grab your hair. If he didn’t get you closer, he’d have to pull you up and take you in front of an elderly guest, and that would be less than ideal.
As if on cue, you took a free hand he’d rested on his leg, and wrapped it around your throat. You stifled a little squeal of joy as he squeezed on you firmly.
“Yes. Mrs. McClintock, it’s so good to see you out of your room, I’ll send the MacDonalds right over.” He wouldn’t. He would have to bend you over this desk. Sonny never did anything halfway and you sure wouldn’t be a stick of gum. You would be a whole meal, and dessert.
Mrs. McClintock huffed and made herself scarce, slamming the door to her room like a child.
He gasped into his palm and you knew, deep in your gut, that he was close. You did that to him.
Sonny’s warm hand squeezed in a pace that matched the rhythm you had set sliding him in and out of your warm wet mouth.
And then the dam broke.
You felt Sonny’s legs shudder as he tightened his grip on your throat. The tears in your eyes started to fall as he came undone in your mouth. The deep satisfaction made you start to work your fingers in between your legs. If he wanted to continue after this, he would have a lot to work with.
Sonny gave you a hungry look down as he took in your sweet face, tear-stained, and smug. He muttered some words to himself that you later found translated to ‘greedy slut’, and it wasn’t as if you could argue.
You got up off your knees, feeling his hand on your head to steer you away from hitting it on the desk. Your neck felt strange without his hand around it.
“I like being in your mouth.” He said, in a stupor.
“I like having you there.” You replied as he kissed you, tasting himself in your mouth.
The rest of the morning is an exquisite haze of hands, mouths, and teeth.
In his twelve years as owner and proprietor of The Best Exotic Marigold Hotels, Sonny Kapoor had never been late for morning roll-call.
There’s a first time for everything.
49 notes · View notes
likeawildthing · 3 years
Text
Not to be morbid on main, but everyone dies and people are rarely prepared for it. It’s so much easier when you know your loved one’s wishes. So even if you’re a teenager or twenty-three and healthy, I hope this helps you start thinking about end-of-life wishes, because it can happen to us all (both the dying and, rudely, being died upon).
Cremations are an affordable way to subvert the funeral industry, but going this route puts the burden of “the little things” on the family. I’ve learned a lot in the last 36 hours and wanted to pass those things that weren’t on any checklists, because the burden is on you to navigate the process.
Putting this under a cut because it’s so long (although not comprehensive). Obviously some of this is altered because COVID and some is meant to be applicable in some distant, theoretical future when we can go out to lunch again.
Before you die
Think about it, talk about it, write it down
Think about what kind of rememberance you want, if any. If it doesn’t matter, tell people that so they don’t fret about it and grieve in whatever way works best for them.
Communicate now to save your family and friends angst later.
Build an “in case of death” binder, zip drive, google doc with links, etc. Make sure your passwords are up to date so that’s not an administrative nightmare for your loved ones.
Advanced directives. Here’s a great article explaining the types of medical advanced directives and decisions to make before an accident or illness happens, including whether you want to donate your organs.
We lost grandma for about twenty minutes yesteday because we couldn’t find the paperwork and grandpa couldn’t remember where they signed up for services. Death. Binder. Have a death binder/folder/zip drive so no one loses grandma.
Insurance. 
You likely have insurance through work, so consider that. It will also expire if you leave your job.
You can usually get, with minimal fuss, a 10- or 20-year term policy with enough to cover your arrangements and debts for less than $20 a month. Death expenses are anywhere from $5-$20k, conservatively. 
Talk to your auto insurance agent and score a multi-line discount.
Body snatchers. 
If you want to be cremated, talk to a local crematory beforehand and give them your basic information. It can be paid out of your estate (i.e. by your family or a life insurance policy) when it happens. 
Most funeral homes (I believe) require pre-payment. It’s super morbid but there are TONS of heavily discounted grave sites for sale on Craigslist if that’s the route you want to go. 
Here’s a list of certified green burial sites in the US.
Donating your body to science 101.
Memorial service. 
The idea of a “proper” funeral is more or less out the window, especially in the time of COVID. Celebration of life? Religious ceremony (or not)? A picnic at your favorite park? Anything goes, so figure it out now. 
When my sister-in-law died, we had a celebration of life at a non-profit who donated the space and had a poker tournament with her ash tin (she lost). 
Whether you have strong or no preferences, write that down to guide decision-making. 
Memorials. 
Traditionally people would donate money in the event of a death to a charity, foundation, or family account, or flowers to a funeral home or church.
 Family accounts (like for children) are traditionally done in care of the deceased’s bank but online fundraisers are a thing. 
If you have a particular charity you love, add this to your list of wishes.
Food. 
Before COVID it was pretty typical for there to be some kind of meal after a funeral. Will this be a restaurant? 
This is ultimately up to the family but if you have strong preferences (i.e. no church or Italian food), tell people now.
Obituary. 
Writing down the basic facts of your life, hobbies, and accomplishments you want included in your obituary means your family doesn’t have to do a guessing game. 
Plants, animals, stuff, etc.
Do you want your clothes to go to a specific charity? 
Do you NOT want your stuff to go to a specific charity? (Goodwill is terrible!)
Who will get your car (person, donate, sell)? Want to have your record collection to go one sister? Obviously family will divvy up stuff how they like, but write down any special considerations.
Have a plan for your pets (insurance, vet info, guardianship).
Please organize and digitize your photos if they aren’t already.
If you lose someone close:
Identify the primary griever
Support that person/those people by providing feedback when solicited, running errands as needed, and running interference so they aren’t inundated with all the little things.
Notifying people
Use the phone tree method. Great Aunt M will be happy to help by calling your cousins. Your boss, coworkers and HR. Your mom’s best friend/your adoptive aunt, your mom’s bunco group. 
Ask that family not put anything on social media until the principal people are informed. I found out my grandpa died on facebook!
Esp these days, set boundaries for visits (who, where, and in what capacity).
Designate one person to be the primary contact for extended family to keep the burden off the primary griever(s). 
Give this persons’ information when the first phone calls are made. It also makes sense for this person to be the travel coordinator. 
This person should have a good handle on family dynamics (i.e. my aunt is flying in and would drive my grandma nuts so she’s staying with Mom). 
This should be their only task because it’s time consuming.
Food
When people die, people gather, even in the time of COVID. Be responsible but expect a ton of drop by food. Clean out the primary griever’s fridge in anticipaton.
Organization
Start a shared family Google doc or sheet. Consolidate to do lists, anecdotes, important contact information, questions and inquiries, etc. 
Pay to have the houses of anyone hosting (gatherings, people coming in from out of town, etc.) cleaned. Or, delegate. This can be an act of service for someone who wants to help and doesn’t mind doing the work. 
Find the death binder (hopefully), legal documentation, etc. Get a folder or binder for papers if one doesn’t exist. And start a shared google doc for loved ones to track everything.
Delegate
I know I have said this three times, but it’s important. If you’re a primary decision maker do not be the primary do-er. My mom is the primary decision maker so my sisters and I are doing literally everything else. 
Say YES when people ask if they can help you. Look at your running list of to-dos and say yes.
Pay to have the houses of people who are hosting cleaned. It will seriously be such a life saver, or this can be an act of service for someone who wants to help.
Social media
You will need to decide what to do with a person’s social media. Do you start a tribute page? Turn their facebook (if they’re old) into a tribute page for a time? Indefinitely? Things to think about. 
Thank yous
Keep a running list of people to thank after via hand-written thank you notes. The link includes guidelines on 
who should receive a thank you note (gave flowers, brought food, made donations, helped with arrangements or the service(s), did readings, or went well out of their way to warm your heart or show up)
when to send them (ideally 2-3 weeks after the funeral)
here’s how to write them (it doesn’t matter if you buy fancy, ones or dollar store ones, make sure they’re hand written).
Receipts. 
Don’t be the petty biatch your cousins hate, but do save significant receipts to be reimbursed by the estate. (I.e. catering hundreds of dollars of food, paying $250 for programs and thank-you cards like I just did, etc.)
Service.
You will have a million decisions to make including
what kind of service to hold, if any
where to hold it
costs
hymns, readings, and anecdotes to share
who will be pall bearers, readers, vocalists, and give eulogies
Crematories handle cremation only, not the service details. 
you will need photo boards (Hobby Lobby has nice black foamcore ones) or a powerpoint (and a way to display it depending on the venue)
a guest or memorial book
a card basket,
memorial cards, possibly programs, and thank you cards 
Officiants, musicians, religious institutions, etc. all need to be paid (and tipped) for their time.
If we ever wrangle this pandemic, donating funeral flowers to a nursing homes is a fantastic way to brighten residents’ days. 
Obituary.
Obituaries are expected, but traditionally costly ($200-$800). As part of the publishing fee, most newspapers keep the obituary on legacy.com indefinitely.
A funeral home will assist you with this, but the burden will be on you and your loved ones if using other methods. 
These take hours to write and many hands does not make light work. Keep it to 2-4 key people. Having the facts laid out will help, and so will looking at other obituaries. I read a great tip which was to write about your loved one in present tense first, then change the tense before submission. 
Newspapers will update your spelling and grammar but that’s about it. Cheaper alternatives: 
Death notice which gives age, date and location of death, and who is handling funeral arrangements. Our crematory put in the death notice for us because they had her body, but the requirements on this likely vary state-to-state. 
Here is a place to put a free online obituary.
Plants, animals, stuff, etc. 
Save the plants and pets. 
Household misc. are usually not dictated by the will, except in special circumstances or contested items. Closest members will go through possessions first. Voice early if you want something in particular, but understand that you may not get it. That’s ok. 
Going through someone’s life is an overwhelming process. You may be repulsed and sad and overwhelmed and amused, all at the same time.  
In deciding what to keep, as I’ve now cleared out three houses, I’ve found that quality over quantity is the way to go. The sweet spot? 1-2 sentimental + useful things. My great grandmother’s thimble and juicer? Use them all the time, and I remember her lemonade. 
It’s okay to throw away some keepsakes and let things get thrown out or donated, depending on the thing. 
Don’t give into guilt if you don’t want the china your Aunt Karen is pressuring you into taking when she doesn’t want it either.
Legal stuff. 
If someone dies, there will be all kinds of legal things you will need to do (bank accounts, utilities, debtors, education, etc.), investments or 401k, etc. 
This varies too much by state and circumstance to talk about in depth but there are guides to specifically help you.
If someone you love has lost someone they love
Do not give platitudes or ask if they’re ok
Don’t expect a response from someone grieving
Do send a card! It’s so thoughtful. I keep a stack of blank condolence cards and a set of forever stamps in my closet. It doesn’t have to be a $20 card to be special.
Don’t judge someone by how they grieve
Offer specific, actionable help if you’re close enough to give it
I am going to come over and clean at 10, leave the house unlocked
I’m at the store and am going to buy cheap vodka unless you tell me what kind of wine you want
oops I got you an uber eats gift card in your gmail sorry/not sorry
Buy thank you cards with stamps as a condolence gift, depending on the person and situation
Send a plant instead of a bouquet of flowers
Make a donation in the loved one’s name if you have the funds
If the grieving person is someone super close (best friend, sister, etc.) add the date in your recurring calender so you can check up on them this day next year with a card and/or phone call
99 notes · View notes
cupcakemolotov · 3 years
Text
Road to Ruin
I... have no idea where this came from. But hey, I’ll take almost 2K of story after a drought of words. SFW, character death, probably some angst. You can read it here on A03 if you prefer.
                                                            -
Caroline had missed the Memorial Service.
Finals at NYU had been brutal, her schedule packed and tangled tightly together after a truly unfair back to back testing schedule. She’d wanted nothing more than to climb into her lumpy dorm bed and sleep for a week, but she’d promised Bonnie she’d try to make it.
She hadn’t.
But that was the fault of May storms and erratic flight schedules, not her personal choice. By the time her mom picked her up in Richmond, five hours late and dragging with exhaustion no number of espresso shots could perk up, it was dark and raining. She’d fallen asleep in the car, dragged herself into the house, and had just enough energy to change before diving into her bed for the sleep she’d been missing for what felt like weeks.
Elena was dead.
The news had come five days before finals, and after sobbing her eyes out on her RA’s shoulder, she’d pulled herself together and buried herself in all night study sessions and endless equations. But the knowledge had lingered, that this friend of hers who had grown so distant the last year, more distant than any amount of school schedules and new friends could allow for when Caroline was a devout texter, was gone. She’d cried in the shower, for the girl who she’d once known and would never know again.
Shifting her weight on the damp grass, Caroline studied the freshly dug grave. The last few years before graduation hadn’t been good for their friendship, High School having been a roller coaster of drama and boys that was expected, she supposed. But if only that had been the only drama, she was certain they wouldn't have grown so far away from each other. There had been that weird mass grave that someone had found that had kept her mom busy for months dealing with the locals and the FBI, the weird way the old boarding house had been repaired seemingly to open up only to remain empty. Those strangers who her mom had not liked who had asked questions about a couple of weird gravestones in the museum. That series of petty thefts that had kept her mom even busier than the mass grave and its collection of weird historians and FBI investigations, that had finally culminated in some family heirlooms being stolen from the Lockwoods.
Tyler had bitched for months about it. Weirdly, it had been those complaints that had been the deciding factor that had her breaking up with him. Yeah, the sex had been good, but a girl did not need pillow talk about family heirlooms and how upset his mom had been. Any boyfriend worth their salt (and teenage hormones) should have been far too distracted by her being naked right there, not their moms.
She shuddered a little, thinking about it.
The second half of their junior year had been a mess, and been made worse when Aunt Jenna had died. Caroline’s fingers tightened on the bouquet she was holding, thinking of all the deaths that had accumulated that year. Aunt Jenna. Her Dad. Carol Lockwood. How terrified she had been that her mom would end up next, logical or not.
Then there had been the way Elena had gone all weirdly obsessed with finding her biological parents, the way it had driven her as if it was something outside of herself she couldn't control. Caroline studied the tops of the flowers she held in her hand, wondering if not for the first time if she could have done something different. Been a better friend, helped Elena in some way. Those long weeks that first Christmas when Elena had decided to spend it alone, how she had refused to answer a single text message until she’d shown back up at school, dark circles under eyes like an underfed anemic.
She’d been… different, after that. Less boy crazy and more… mature. And that summer, she’d gone to meet a family claiming to be hers. And when she’d come home, she’d been so happy. Bouncing, sparkling happy. Cousins, she’d said. Brother’s and a sister who said that her mother had been theirs and they’d been looking for her.
Family.
That was what Caroline wanted to remember her. The girl who sat with her for hours after Bill died, both of them quiet, legs tangled on Caroline’s bed. The girl who liked board games and pink lipstick and who had terrible taste in shoes. Her friend. Not the girl from their Senior year who had slowly become something else entirely. Pale and wane, short tempered and then so, so quiet. The girl whose new family moved into Mansion at the edge of town that had been empty for decades, who paid for an expensive car and clothes and who never came to a single game to watch her cheer.
Letting out a slow breath, she set the flowers she’d brought down on the grave and chewed on her lower lip. People usually said things at graves, didn’t they? But she’d never been good at that sort of thing. Not at her Dad’s grave, and not here, standing over the bones of her friend. She’d brought daisy’s because Elena liked them, and she briefly closed her eyes, hoping that Elena knew she was here, that she missed her, and that even if she reached the old age of one hundred, she’d remember the night she and Elena and Bonnie had laughed until they cried over the most ridiculous of conversations, until they’d had to scramble to pretend they’d been sleeping when her mom came home at dawn after her shift.
That would be the Elena she’d take with her.
Swallowing hard, she turned on one heel and jerked to a stop, heart slamming into her throat as she found a man she didn’t recognize lingering far too close to her. He was only a few inches taller than her, but something about the utter stillness of his posture, the way she hadn’t heard him walk up behind her, her usual excellent sense of people taught by her mother and perfected in the subway system having failed to ping at her, left her breathless with surprise. For a moment, Caroline struggled to get her pulse under control before narrowing her eyes. “Excuse you, creepy much? Most people have the decency not to loom in graveyards.”
A sudden hint of a smile played across a distractingly full mouth, and he reached up and pushed his sunglasses up into his rumpled curls, something about the way he was looking at her sending the faintest hint of alarm down her spine. “Spend a lot of time in graveyards?”
“That is none of your business,” Caroline said, letting her voice frost over in disapproval.
“Apologies, love.” He said, body shifting from that hair raising awareness to a soft charm she might have liked if she hadn’t seen him looking at her like she was a particularly interesting bug. “I didn't recall seeing you at the funeral, and I’m sure I would have remembered you.”
Something about him, the way his eyes never left hers, put her back up. She hadn’t spent the last two years in New York City to let some weirdo stranger intimidate her now. “I don’t recognize you at all,” she said primly. “So that means you were fairly new to Elena’s life. Do you make a habit of memorizing faces at funerals? That seems like the sort of thing that would alarm a psychologist.”
The curve of his mouth deepened, and to her despair, he had dimples. “You must be Caroline Forbes. Ms. Bennett was disappointed that you missed the service.”
Caroline shrugged, stubbornly holding his gaze though it was starting to bother her that he didn’t blink. “May storms are a bitch. And neither Bonnie nor Elena mentioned anyone who would match your description.”
He looked intrigued. “Do you usually ask for physical descriptions of their acquaintances?”
“And pictures of their drivers licenses,” she retorted. “So that if they go missing, I know where to direct my mother to find them, but you're definitely not either of their types, and since you think you have some claim on Elena, that must mean you belong to the Mikaelson family. Which one are you?”
She didn't do much to hide what she thought of his family, and it didn’t seem to bother him.
“Smart,” he murmured. “I’m Klaus.” And then he offered her his hand, something like a challenge lingering at the back of his eyes. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Caroline.”
It was a dare. And she was terrible at turning those down, even as her instincts warned her that there was something about this man she wasn’t seeing. But she was also standing twenty feet away from a number of her own dead relatives, and Grandma Forbes would haunt her forever if she was rude to this man in front of her. Baring her teeth in something like a smile, she took his hand. “A pleasure, I’m sure.”
Laughter had lit his eyes a half moment before their skin touched, and something she couldn’t describe rolled down her spine. More sensation than feeling, she felt it down to her feet, and it left her pulse pounding. She pulled her hand back, too quick to be polite, but she didn’t care as she stared at the man who had gone still and so quietly dangerous, she was debating reaching for the pepper stray attached to her keys.
She could probably get it out and in his face before he lunged.
Maybe.
Klaus’ fingers had curled into his palm, as if he too had felt whatever that had been, and the blue of his eyes were doing something strange, and Caroline became intensely aware of everything around them. The buzz of summer insects, the shape of his stupidly plush mouth, the smell of fresh turned dirt. It was the near silent buzz of an incoming text that broke the staring contest between them. Senses hyper-alert, she pulled her phone out of her purse and saw that she had two missed calls from Bonnie. Glancing up from her lashes to find that Klaus hadn’t looked away, so she pasted on her best false smile and shrugged.
“Well, Klaus, I’m sure this is where I should say something polite about seeing you around, but that seems super unlikely,” Caroline said with a false shrug of disappointment. “So, I’ll just say bye instead.”
A lowering of his lashes, something behind his eyes that burned her skin. “Hmm, I suppose we’ll see, won’t we? The family has decided to stick around a bit longer, give ourselves time to mourn. You may be surprised how much you’ll see us.”
Caroline snorted and stepped around him. “History of your family’s willingness to grace the town with your presence says otherwise.” But because her grandma had raised her right, and was probably seriously judging her only granddaughter from the plot just a few feet away, she smiled and waved, just like her pageant days had taught her. And only when she was almost to her car, did she relax enough to look at her text.
And felt her heart drop to her toes.
I don’t think Elena is dead.
Brows tucking tightly together, she went through the motions of unlocking the car door, glancing back towards the man lingering in the graveyard. Klaus hadn't moved, except to slid his hands into his pockets and to turn to watch her. She could still feel the imprint of his fingers against hers, the heat and calluses of him, the shock of him down her spine. For a moment, she tried to remember what Elena had told her about her biological family, the people who went through all the right motions but never showed her friend the care she deserved. The brother’s who had been so considerate, and offered her anything money could buy but not a single ounce of affection. Lifting her chin, she narrowed her eyes, even though she knew he couldn't see her.
Let him think what he wanted. She was fairly certain she’d never see him again. Klaus, who stood in graveyards in pressed slacks and rosaries around his throat. Something was going on there, and the last thing she needed was for him to turn out to be some kind of serial killer.
Sliding into the driver’s seat, she started the engine and set her teeth, only then allowing herself to really absorb what Bonnie had sent her. Not dead? What was Bonnie thinking? And if she was right, why would the Mikaelson’s lie?
Why bury Elena, fake or otherwise, with the ghosts if she wasn’t really dead?
43 notes · View notes
youcouldmakealife · 3 years
Text
LBTE: Jared (33-36)
In which there is a merry Christmas, a less merry gift exchange, names are worn, kinks are learned, Bryce Marcus is the most absurd person in the world, and Jared loves him.
Series page is here if you want to follow along.
33. Exchange
“Our break’s really short this year, so my mom’s coming here for Christmas,” Bryce says. “And she really likes this kind of thing, so.”
“…Oh,” Jared says, struck once again by how ridiculously sweet Bryce can be. It’s like, almost nauseating, but — in a good way? Can things be almost nauseating in a good way?
If they can Bryce hits that a LOT on the sweetness meter.
“That sounds good,” Jared says, and it actually does. He never expected to actually look forward to brunch with his boyfriend and his boyfriend’s mom, but apparently if moms are all as chill as Elaine — well, not chill, exactly, she is very huggy
Jared remains suspicious of hugs from non-Bryces. He will eventually cave and make that ‘non Marcuses’
His dad is the kind of weirdo who actually appreciates socks for Christmas
Socks for Christmas are bomb, grow up, Jared.
His grandma gets him a sweater and a Calgary Flames calendar like she has since he was a little kid (his dad gets one too, so there’s always one in the kitchen, one in Jared’s room) and — oh god. Bryce is literally in the calendar. March is going to be the best month ever. Deniable pin up of his boyfriend looking hilariously intense above his desk? Check.
Also, now Jared’s wondering if his dad’s going to like, just…skip March. Fuck, he can’t wait.
Jared: hey dad it’s March.
Don: No it is February 42nd.
He wakes up to a merry xmas and a heart from Bryce, a selfie of him and his mom in matching fucking robes, which he can’t handle without coffee.
Jared still can’t handle it after coffee, it turns out. He can’t even manage to chirp Bryce about it, because it’s so fucking cute. What has he become? Bryce Marcus has destroyed his snark.
Just wait. You’re gonna match too. And you’ll HATE it.
34. Gratitude
“Jared!” Elaine says, sounding so excited to see him it’s kind of flattering, then nudges Bryce aside to pull him into a giant hug. For a tiny lady, she hugs pretty fight.
Jared: *endures*
Yolk is where the tasty part of eggs lives. Anything else, why even bother.
I will die with Jared on this hill.
Elaine does most of the talking, about Bryce’s grandparents, aunt, his dad’s sister — Jared knows all this because she always gives Jared, the context, all “Your nan — that’s my mom, Bryce’s father’s mom passed two years ago —”
CANON ERROR ALERT.
“Did your mom just like, the opposite of cock block us?” Jared asks when they get back to Bryce’s. He’s been wondering the whole short walk, but it seems like a dumb thing to say publicly. “Cock enable?”
Elaine is very thoughtful.
“It’s not, like, a contest,” Bryce says. “I just picked up whatever. Like, whenever I saw something and thought of you, I picked it up.”
“So apparently you think about me a lot,” Jared says.
“I mean,” Bryce says. “Pretty much, yeah.”
Bryyyyce.
“I lost the receipts,” Bryce says. “And none of it would fit me anyway. Like, except for the tie, obviously, but I think it’d look better on you. I can’t really do stripes.”
“Lost, or threw out?” Jared asks.
“I can afford it,” Bryce repeats. “Seriously, it’s not a big deal.”
You ain’t getting the receipts.
“Bryce, I can’t wear a necklace with my own initials,” Jared says. “This is like the jewelry equivalent of getting a tattoo of your own name. People are going to wonder if I regularly forget it or something. ”
Jared.
“The chain is okay, though?” Bryce asks. “Or like…not?”
“Yeah, the chain is — I like it,” Jared says.
“I can just return the pendant part then,” Bryce mumbles.
“I thought you didn’t keep any receipts?” Jared asks.
“Wasn’t sure if you’d like it, so,” Bryce says, and fuck, Jared’s hurt his feelings. Great fucking job, Matheson.
BRYCE.
“You don’t have to pretend to,” Bryce says. “It’s okay.”
“I—” Jared says. “I always say the dumbest shit. Please don’t return it?”
“Seriously, it’s fine,” Bryce says, unthreading the necklace from the pendant, not quite looking at Jared.
“Bryce,” Jared says.
JARED YOU HURT HIS SOFT LITTLE HEART.
“I’m really sorry I was a dick about it,” Jared says, which is still hard, then, easier, “I love you.”
“You too,” Bryce says, and Jared tells himself sternly the entire drive home that overanalysing the fact that Bryce kissed him on the cheek instead of the mouth was because Jared was barely reachable through all his presents and not because Bryce has now decided Jared’s an ungrateful asshole it’s not worth being with, and 100% fails not to overanalyse endlessly until Bryce texts him a few hours later with another adorable selfie of him and his mom, and a ‘mom says hi again!’, at which point he lets himself breathe again.
It was a rough few hours.
35. Two Finger Salute
Cue me snickering like a twelve year old.
He can’t make himself buy a Marcus jersey, but he can sure as shit fit a Marcus t-shirt into his budget. He’ll just get a cheaper pair of shoes.
Literally just ask your boyfriend he would JUMP on the chance to give you a jersey with his name on it, the only reason he hasn’t already gifted you with a jersey is because it looks presumptuous.
“You’re wearing my shirt,” Bryce says.
“I mean,” Jared says. “It’s mine. Just because it has your name on it—”
“You’re wearing my shirt,” Bryce says.
“Wanna sign it?” Jared asks.
Bryce swallows, and in hindsight, Jared probably should have expected what comes next.
Bryce has just learnt a new kink of his! And it goes both ways (wearing the pendant with Jared’s initials? Big yes from him)
“You know I could have gotten you a jersey if you asked,” Bryce says, stroking a hand down Jared’s back, slow. Jared thinks he might be tracing the shape of the nine, from the vague pattern he feels through the cotton. “I wanted to get you one for Christmas, I just wasn’t sure if you’d think I was like, an arrogant douchebag or something.”
SEE!!
“Oh,” Jared says. “But isn’t that like, pretty gay or something?”
“I mean,” Bryce says. “I kind of am, though.”
Jared grins at him, because that’s like, progress. He didn’t even hesitate.
Progress!!!
“Not now,” Jared says. “Probably something we should like, work up to anyway? I mean, I’ve never taken more than a couple fingers, so.”
“When?” Bryce asks, and the look on his face is less like, ‘hey, did you finger yourself in the shower this morning’ and more ‘who the fuck did you do that with’, which is so ridiculous Jared can’t even with him.
Bryce Justin.
“Bryce, you were literally my first kiss, which you know,” Jared says. “Do I really seem like the kind of dude who’d let someone finger me without at least making out first?”
Jared and I are judging you, Bryce.
“I kind of want to try everything with you,” Bryce says. “I’m just like—”
Self-conscious, Jared can finish for him, because he looks it right now.
My boo. And man, once he gets past the self-consciousness when it comes to sex with Jared, things are — NO COMPLAINTS FROM THE MARCUS MATHESONS.
“Just saying what’s true,” Bryce says, and for that, Jared has to start a wrestling match he inevitably fucking loses. He thinks it was closer this time though. Him managing to cram some time in the weight room alongside everything else in his packed schedule is paying dividends. One day Bryce is going to lose.
You literally only ever win when Bryce wants you to win, Jared.
So he can’t text like, ‘the gay thing’, even though it’d clue Bryce in pretty quick, or like, something a little more explicit in image form, which he probably wouldn’t be able to bring himself to do even if he was eighteen. Jared’s heard enough horror stories about that shit getting leaked.
:( Joey.
“I was sitting across from Burns when you sent me that,” he says. “You got me hard in front of Burns.”
Truly scarring experience. Don’t check your phone when you’re with your coach, lesson learned.
36. Put into Practice
Kind of says a lot that they think as soon as a dude’s gay they’re going to be a creepy fucker about them. Like that they always think they’re way more attractive than they actually are, but also like, that they seem to think it’s normal to be a creepy fucker if you’re into someone. Doesn’t bode well for the girls they like.
Jared being a judgy fucker for Good instead of Evil.
“So hey,” Jared says, when they’re done, because he doesn’t want Bryce to choke on a tomato or something. “I bought lube.”
Turns out Bryce doesn’t even need something in his mouth to visibly choke.
😏
“You’re so fucking beautiful,” Bryce says.
Jared laughs a little breathlessly. “Fuck off.”
<333
“Felt, I dunno,” Bryce says. “Mostly weird. But like, it’d feel better with you, probably. Pretty much everything does.”
Jared needs him to stop talking, because Bryce’s earnest is just — it’s too much for him. He can’t cope.
Bryce: you’re beautiful I love you I trust you everything’s better with you.
Jared: shut up shut up shut UP
“I don’t fucking care what I said,” Jared says. “Seriously, you can totally fuck me right now, I’m so pro that.”
“I want to do it right,” Bryce says.
“If you buy candles and rose petals or some shit, I swear to—”
Jared knows his boyfriend.
“Doubt I would have lasted like, more than a minute anyway,” Bryce mumbles, fingers tracing over Jared’s stomach, too slow to be random.
“Did you just finger paint your own fucking name in come?” Jared asks.
“No,” Bryce says, but like, guiltily.
Bryce is absurd and I love him,
“Well, I dunno,” Bryce says. “I’ve had like, crappy orgasms.”
“Crappy orgasms,” Jared repeats. Like, he gets there being a scale or whatever, some are for sure better than others, but they’re all good.
“Not with you!” Bryce says. “But.”
:(
“Now like, can you get me a cloth or you wanna write your last name too?” Jared asks, and while Bryce does obediently get up to go get a wash cloth, when he returns he throws it right at Jared’s head.
I love them.
45 notes · View notes
secret-engima · 4 years
Text
spideypoolalways
Does Regis ever ask how Titus has papers for the boys? Whats Cor or Clarus' PoV of this? What are some things (fluff or humor) that the boys get up to? Because I can see them getting adopted into the Ulric Clan because of shenanigans and Nyx going 'Yes, these are my people' since LCs just remind me of Ulrics with magic. And how do the Galatians take to the nephew of the Nif Chancellor and clone of the Crown Prince? Since I'm imagining that Titus told some of them and the
spideypoolalways
rest are guessing anyway. And does everyone assume that Noctis and Nox's magics resonated since they're kinda sorta close to each other/are the same person? How does Regis take the news that the only reason that Noctis got healed is because Nox pretty much felt everything Noctis did? /Both/ of his sons were basically attacked by a daemon and he only knew about one of them at the time and didn't do anything to calm or reassure Nox? (Clarus: Only because you didn't know
spideypoolalways
About him, Regis. Regis: Thats no excuse, Clarus.) Does Iris get to be a Shield or did Nox latch onto Axis or one of his kids? Does Acastus find Prompting and drop him off with Noct/Cor? Does Nox hang out with Noct, Ignis, Gladiolus and Prom all the time or does the memories act up enough to make him feel weird about it? How does Regis take his brother and son's Sick Days? What about Dissidia? The 3 youngest Royals getting snatched and the group watching on Crystal
spideypoolalways
Vision? Dad Titus/Regis freaking out over their kids having been summoned to a death match? And how exactly does Titus see the boys? Sons, brothers, cousins? Oooh, more Trauma. Noct, Nox and Acastus w/others playing and end up in the Crystal room. Cue the boys lighting up, maybe passing out because the magic hits their young system really hard (its why Royals aren't supposed to be Presented until 18) and everyone freaks out, and news makes it to Regis and Titus that they
spideypoolalways
Are in the infirmary and the gist of what happened via panicked guards and rush there immediately and are jumped by panicked kids talking and crying about what happened. I didn't realize I had so many questions. But now I need to know. 👀👀 Please!🙏
spideypoolalways
Oh! Just remembered a little more! Does anyone pick up on the people/places that he shouldn't know? Do they assume that Nox got some of it from Noct, like with the Marelith? Or are they assuming LC/ Oracle DNA mix?
Me: Yes, Regis asks about the papers and Titus doesn’t OUTRIGHT admit he did an illegal but he does grudgingly explain that he needed papers in case the NIfs came looking and he ... knows ... a few people who can help ... “recreate” papers for refugees who lost theirs in whatever fire or tragedy drove them from their homes.
Regis mulls over that for ten long seconds then blatantly pretends he never heard it in the first place. Those “people” likely saved the life of his son and half-brother, he can let it slide this once.
I need Nyx Ulric to adopt these two now JUST so Nyx can tease that he’s related to Captain (then later when he learns that they’re Lucis Caelums he can quietly die in a corner because OH NO HE’S RELATED TO THE KING). Not sure how or when Nyx adopts them, but he absolutely does.
It probably happens when he's just a wee bit sloshed. Not enough to be incoherent or insincere, but enough that he doesn’t feel any fear offering to adopt the pair while babysitting them because Captain had to work late and Nyx is off the combat roster until his ankle heals. Once he’s sober he is a Panic™, but Captain takes it surprisingly well and Nox loves his new braid. Acastus just looks Amused™.
Lib slaps Nyx over the head because IDIOT THINK THIS STUFF THROUGH then gives him another drink because TWO MORE ULRICS. It’s a good thing Nyx is an Ulric Keeper in this AU, because he can teach them most of the Ulric Clan stories and dances and make them proper Ulrics.
Acastus loves introducing himself as Acastus Ulric Drautos, both because it’s fancy like “Lucis Caelum” is and also because it made both Titus and Nyx spit their coffee the first time they hear it.
The Galahdians ... have mixed feelings at first. But the predominant one is that it doesn’t matter that this kid is clearly related to the Chancellor (at first they all think the Chancellor bedded Captain’s Aunt, since they don’t know about the LC blood, and that’s why he looks like Ardyn) because Captain has clearly staked a claim on him. Galahd (in my HCs) is a Very Adoption Heavy culture and big on judging people by their current family rather than any previous blood ties, so ... mostly the Chancellor thing gets intensely ignored. Acastus isn’t an Izunia, he’s a Drautos (and then later an Ulric). So they will treat him as such.
But in private there is some debate on exactly what happened, for the Chancellor to vanish around the time his ... relation (son? They mostly assume son), shows up in Drautos’s care.
No few number of them think Titus stumbled on Ardyn with the two kids and killed the Chancellor to save them.
For Nox ... the Lucis Caelum blood is basically impossible to hide. This boy LOOKS like a literal carbon copy of the Prince but younger and he’s young so his control over his magic is ... not. Not that good. Especially not when there’s so mUCH of it.
All of Galahd listened to the Glaive who was on babysitting duty when Nox had a rare tantrum and skewered the wall with ghostly blades and all privately, immediately agree to Never Tell Anyone. Ever.
Well. To be fair, they do debate whether they have a duty to tell Regis, but again the Adoption Culture comes into play and they decide it’s up to Titus to spill that secret. A few Glaives do ask Titus about it (Titus nearly has a heart attack because SINCE WHEN DID THEY KNOW) and when they ask if they know who the mother was, Titus looks very grim and very, very quiet for a long time, then admits:
There is no mother. There never was.
They stare at him in confusion until Acastus, lurking nearby with too-sharp eyes, gives a smile that could cut and says brittlely that “amazing things that can be done with science these days you know. Truly amazing. Why, get a blood sample and a tank of the right solutions and you could probably grow anything you wanted”.
The Glaives are Horrified™. So is the rest of Little Galahd when it gets around and then is made a Clan Secret by all the Clans unanimously. The secret never leaves the borders of their little slum.
Also yes, people assume that Noctis’s and Nox’s magic resonated because Nox is a clone and it freaks them out.
Regis is Such A Guilt when he finds out how Acastus knew about Noctis’s injury. No it doesn’t matter that he DIDN’T KNOW NOX EXISTED. One of his son’s (his FIVE YEAR OLD son) was suffering. Was screaming in agony and terror and Regis didn’t do a THING about it and no amount of logic can make that better.
Nox latches onto Axis’s triplets in this AU so while Iris will be best friends with him, his Shield, Hand, and Sword are actually all made up of Axis’s three kids. Axis is a BIT of an internal Scream when Nox is at the age people start making noises about him building a Retinue and taking Iris as his Shield and Nox goes, “NO. I have a Shield already! A Hand and Sword too!” And stuff spirals out to reveal Axis as Clarus’s kid (Clarus takes it much better than Axis thought he would, tho Axis didn’t expect to see Lord Amicitia go deathly pale and sit down hard in the nearest chair).
Honestly Iris might be the future love interest in this AU you never know. It would be hilarious if nothing else.
Bold of you to assume Acastus didn’t find Prompto early and bring him home to NOX because “Look Beloved Nibling I Found You A Friend!”. Prompto is a confusion because Nox is like- 4 at the time. But Prompto likes babysitting and playing with Nox and hearing Acastus’s stories and Titus just kinda- sighs his way through the playdates until he realizes that Prompto has been staying in his house for about two weeks with no sign of the parents.
Titus, after much snooping later, sitting at the kitchen table of Grandma Ostium quietly pulling his hair out: HOW DO YOU ADOPT A THIRD CHILD. DOES IT COUNT AS KIDNAPPING IF THEY COME OVER AND STAY WITH YOU FOREVER AND THE LEGAL PARENTS NEVER NOTICE. ACASTUS WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO ME.
Acastus: I regret nothing. Do you want me to fake Prompto’s death? I’m sure there’s enough Prompto’s out there that nobody will notice if you gain a nephew called Prompto Drautos.
Titus, holding his face in his hands while Grandma Ostium laughs at him in the corner: NO, ACASTUS. DO NOT FAKE THE DEATH OF THE CHILD. How do you even know how to do that? Nevermind I don’t want to know.
Roughly a year later when Everything Gets Revealed, Titus and Cor: *intense staring contest over Smol Blond Child*
Cor: You don’t know where he-
Titus, growling like a cranky Behemoth that might very well bite off someone’s head: He’s a Niflheim created clone. I know.
Cor: ....
Titus: He's been living in my house for a year. I’ve seen the barcode. It’s not like I wasn’t raising one already.
Cor: His legal parents-
Titus: Is me. The Argentums were emotionally neglectful and didn’t even notice when he hadn’t come home for a week and a half.
Cor: *guilty angry silence*
Titus: ...Kid could use an uncle. If you want to man up and be part of his life.
(hgfhg this is post is getting long Imma try to speed through the last questions a bit)
Yes, Nox hangs out with the Chocobros when he can because he adores them (especially Brother Prompto and Team Mom Iggy) but he also has his own friend group in the Little Galahd community so it doesn’t strike anyone as odd really. Nox is a naturally loving child for all he’s shy and Iggy and Gladio are Noctis’s friends and Prompto is his adopted brother (and later Noctis’s best friend).
Regis does Not take the Sick Days well. It makes him alarmed and angry because Lucis Caelums aren’t supposed to get sick days from their own magic and it speaks of BAD THINGS that both of the presumably experimented on and tortured LCs have them.
I’m going to have to come back to Dissidia another time (someone remind me) because this post is too long to ramble here but it would be- it would be Great. Honestly. It would either be the 3 littlest, just Acastus, or just Acastus and REGIS for some brotherly bonding and any of them would be Great and Chaotic. Crystal-o-vision absolutely happens.
The Crystal Room is under 24 hour guard so I don’t think the kids could wander in by accident, plus Acastus would actively avoid the area because of his Trauma.
Now Acastus being presented when he turns 18 on the other hand... >:))))))
Short Version: Much shouting, much alarm, much angst from Regis and Titus and everyone and also the first Sick Day Acastus has had since he turned 17 and by far one of the worst he’s ever had in his (second) life.
I might to a longer version later but not right now.
For Nox’s oddities and odd knowledge they kind of assume both? At first they think it’s just him resonating with Noctis so deeply that there’s a transfer (cue angst from Regis because what is going to happen to Nox when Noctis fulfills his destiny as Chosen King???) but then when Nox starts knowing stuff Noctis doesn’t/can’t know, they start to wonder if the scientists ... Tampered with his DNA. If they got their hands on Noctis’s, which should have been impossible, then it’s not all that out there they got their hands on Oracle DNA.
Sylva is ... very alarmed and very confused when Regis secretly contacts her on a secure encrypted line to ask if there were any ... symptoms to look for in an Oracle child. Because- yes there were but WHY DO YOU NEED TO KNOW?
Regis: they wouldn’t happen to be *lists very specific things*
Sylva: ....Have you seen any Messengers nearby lately.
Regis: Carbuncle, a black puppy that disappears into thin air, and a bird woman who can summon wind storms. She calls herself Garuda.
Sylva, having a minor crisis behind her Queenly Facade: I am Very Sure I only have two children so please explain this. Right Now.
Regis: Well............. NiflheimclonedmysonandIthinkmixeditwiththednaofyouoryourdaughterandhehasseerpowersandImayormaynotbepanickingrightnowpleasehelpme.
Sylva, slowly running that over in her mind and figuring out what Regis just said:...
W H A T.
XD Honestly Niflheim might invade Tenebrae only to find the royal family gone because Sylva coincidentally packed her backs and took her and her children on a secret trip to Lucis to have a look at Nox, then since they’re there when Niflheim invades and a spy gets word on what just happened Sylva and Co just- stay there. Oracle Mom Death averted.
Also they absolutely think that it’s Luna’s DNA they used to make Nox because of how instantly Nox gloms onto Luna like a limpet- JUST like he did with Noctis and Regis, and how Luna gets this dazed look in her eyes as their magic tangles and she whispers, “I ... I know you. I know you, don’t I Little Prince? I met you in a dream.” Luna starts crying softly as she pets Nox’s hair and when Sylva asks in alarm why she’s crying, Luna blinks and whispers, “Because he was crying in the dream, and I couldn’t comfort him.”
Acastus lurks in the shadows, watching it all with ... very mixed feelings.
Oracles. He could have gone his entire second life without meeting anymore Oracles. Aera she looks so much like you is that what our daughter would have looked like and oh astrals I KILLED her. I killed the girl with your eyes and your smile and laughed about it later.
138 notes · View notes
klarastjarnljus · 3 years
Text
So much of normal season prep was lost this year that the most important decision I've made was to not stress or worry about missed musts or missed opportunities. Tradition-wise, christmas cleaning is to be done either (family) before first of Advent or (old tradition calendar) starts 20/12.
Tumblr media
We put up advent decorations even though it was still messy and kept tidying little by little.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Christmas laundry should be done on the 2/12, but since I chose just one tablecloth and the christmas curtains has stayed up for years, and I have no christmas rugs or bedclothes to change to, etc, focus has been on eliminating the laundry before my winter break is over.
Anyway, holiday atmosphere settled, school break started and solstice rolled around. Usually, I bake saffron buns for Lucia day (13/12), and make sun bread from the same dough, to eat on solstice after singing a song about the longing for the sun's return. This year, I spent Lucia day at work without any celebrations, and had spiced wine and gingerbread in the evening.
This year on solstice I sang to myself on the couch, caught in a grey bubble of not feeling like much, with spiced wine, and thought of my friends.
A tradition my husband and I have kept to for almost two decades, is watching Nightmare Before Christmas before christmas, and we did it this year as well.
After a week in quarantine, I was able to spend Christmas Eve (that's the big day to celebrate here) with my parents. My husband wasn't well so he stayed at home with the cats.
My mother makes most food for christmas, herself, but I chip in by baking something sweet. My mom makes pickled herring of different flavours, she bakes spiced bread, meatballs, cook brussel sprouts from her garden and prepare the ham. The broth from boiling the ham is often salty and spiced and used for dipping bread in.
For dessert, she makes risalamand. That's rice porridge with whipped cream and diced orange, and I cannot by any physical law eat too much of it.
For after dinner coffee, I had made chocolate peppermint cookies especially for the occasion. Baking is both a family tradition and a passion of mine, and chocolate peppermint is one of my very fondest childhood christmas flavors.
Tumblr media
I also baked butterscotch cookies, but I didn't get any good pics of them.
The process of mixing, kneading and shaping is always a ritual for me, especially when baking for a person or an occasion. The physical work transfers love and purpose.
As the days grow longer, I miss 2nd day and 13th day dinners at my Grandma's. She sent pics of her living room and of herself with a present ribbon as a headband, so silly and cute that it hurts me not to be able to be near her.
Tomorrow I will make what I'd really liked to choose for this post, so you'll get another post a day too late.
For new year's eve every year, in my family we make egg cheese, an old traditional Swedish westcoast dish that's made by heating and curdling a mix of egg and milk, collecting the curds in a cheese mold and letting it drain and set overnight. The result is a soft, almost pudding-like, cheese, with a fresh, neutral taste.
Some eat it as-is with herring, but we prefer to sweeten the curd and eat it with berries or jam.
The recipe I have is the one my mother taught me, that she learned when she was young. My aunt's husband has another recipe that he swears by, and my paternal grandmother yet another one. The recipes were dearly kept secrets back in the day, and in some places still are. Contests between households in the Bohus peninsula were taken very seriously, and disputes about who makes the best egg cheese could go on for years.
This is probably the tradition I value the most, as it's deeply personal and also signifies the returning sun, but that post is gonna have to wait until tomorrow.
@graveyarddirt
12 notes · View notes
k-writer1998 · 3 years
Text
Who Said Love Was Easy (9/12)
Tumblr media
There are many different kinds of people who come and go from your life. Some will stay constant and sturdy like a river, growing alongside you, others will come like a whirlwind who wreaks havoc and leaves just as quickly, then there is everything in between. In this twisted maze of connections, that is where our story begins. A steadfast boy, a girl with a past, a little bit of alcohol, mistakes, and some love. Where can you go wrong with that?
angsty fluff
w.c: 1.5k
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“I don’t know. I mean it's a good thing that my grandma is actually caring about me now right? But why do I have a bad feeling about it?”
“She’s an old woman who lost her only son. You learn things after someone dies, one of them is who was truly genuine and who had ulterior motives. From what I know she was the nicer few of the bunch to begin with, what’s wrong with her finally treating you like her own? Isn’t that what you wanted?”
“Well yeah but that was when my dad was still alive and my life wasn’t such a mess. I feel like this is just some calm for yet another storm to hit me.”
“Hey now, your life hasn’t been that bad.”
“Changbin. I was practically kicked out and for the first six months I was mooching off of you until Aunt Hyorin found me an affordable place. I couldn’t live off of the money I was left forever so I had to start working on top of going to school. My life has been living by solving one problem after the next. Now I’m set for university with my scholarships AND my estranged grandmother wants to love me? Too many “good” things are happening lately, something is bound to go wrong.”
“Stop being such a pessimist. Is it wrong to finally get what you deserve, a good life?”
“Optimism doesn’t keep you alive my friend. Pessimism is what allows me to still be sane even after all of that.”
“And this is why I’m taking you out drinking. You need to loosen up and unwind. Life doesn’t ever follow a set path so why worry when it hasn’t happened yet, especially when you have so many back up plans for this unknown inevitable,” he joked as pushed me yet another drink once he noticed mine had finished. 
“Well last I checked, when I tried last time you got mad at me.”
“Those are two completely different things. I said loosen up not go wild. You were challenging people to drinking contests and the loser paid for the drinks. I had to literally guard you from guys trying to cop a feel at your drunk ass and don’t get me started on what happened when I took you home and accidentally put your code in at your neighbor’s door.”
“Okay the whole thing with Jaehyung-oppa was completely your fault. I’ve lived there for how long? And you still mistook his apartment for mine?”
“Well I’m sorry I was tired after having to drag your drunk self around as you whined and tried to fight me to let you stay out longer.”
“But hey, I never lost.”
“Half the guys let you win cause every time you did you would jump around and hug them before rubbing it in their face,” he rolled his eyes. 
“Fine, yet here you are taking me to drink once again so why are you questioning me?”
“This time isn’t one of your patterns though so we’re safe. Last time was pattern two because your brother-”
“Ah- we are not speaking about that or I will go back into pattern two just to spite you,” I warned. “Now if you’ll excuse me I need to use the restroom.”
      I know Changbin is trying, he’s watched me fall apart after my brother who I thought was my only ally in that family iced me out like the rest of them. He was also beside me as I forced myself back up but I knew he could tell I wasn’t completely myself. All my motivation has since been drained and I’ve just simply been… living. Not like I didn’t have goals, it's just, I can see it within reach yet my feet refuse to move towards it as if they’ve rooted themselves to the ground beneath me. As I came back, Changbin was nowhere to be found and the bartender let me know he had stepped out to take a call. With a sigh I slumped back into my seat at the bar as I ordered a new drink. It felt like time ticked slowly as I waited for Changbin to come back. My eyes scanned the room, taking note of a few interesting characters until I noticed someone approaching. From the look in his eye and the sleazy smile on his face, his intentions were very clear. I immediately stood and made my way over to the first person at the bar that I saw alone and called out immediately. 
“OMG is that you?! I haven’t seen you in forever!”
“I’ve never met you before though?” the boy mumbled. 
“I’m sorry but please work with me. That guy over there is making me uncomfortable,” I dropped my voice so only he can hear, “you can just continue to mumble to yourself, don’t mind me. ”
“ By myself? But my friends were just-”
      He moved his head around as if he had just noticed his friends were no longer there. Well the place was crowded and he wasn’t there earlier so my guess is that they got separated by accident and no offense but thank god for that. Casting a glance I could tell the guy wasn’t buying it so I turned to talk to the boy in front of me yet again. 
“So what’s up with you that your friends took you out and let you get this wasted?”
“It’s nothing big, I just can’t get over a girl…”
“What was it? Break up? Rejection?”
“Neither, I can’t even tell her I like her to begin with but now I can’t because she has a boyfriend. Not like she would consider me anyways.”
“Well you seem like a decent person so I don’t see why she shouldn’t but tell me about her. I’ll give you a girl’s perspective. ” 
      I wasn’t planning to be so invested in our conversation but there was something about him that had me so captivated. I mean yeah he was my type but then there was how his features softened, and there was this sparkle in his eyes when he spoke about this girl… In the midst of it all I got a text from Changbin, teasing me for “going after a guy” while he was away and told me he’ll be waiting back at our seats. On the other hand, the boy had poured out his history with this girl, from their odd meeting to his inevitable downfall into love. There were ghosts of facts about himself as well but never enough to build a full picture of his character. Although his main focus this whole conversation was this mystery girl… above all reason, I started to have a crush on this boy. Dumb, I know. My heart literally chose to play the fool in this story. It’s just… There is something about how he talked and the starry look and the gentle smile and then my brain just kinda went “I wish he looked at me like that” and then I hated myself for doing this to myself. Luckily not long after my brain had realized, his friend had found him and apologized before dragging him back to his group, leaving me to go back to Changbin. 
“Wait so you knew all that when you met me again? That’s fraud you said you could just tell.”
“I can just tell. That night you weren’t really descriptive when you talked about her, you were a little too into the “woe is me” thing so all you really said was that she was pretty,” I rolled my eyes. “So when your eyes practically followed her every move during your shift, I was able to connect the dots.” 
“And after knowing that you still chose to have a… crush… on me?”
      It felt foreign to hear it from him himself. I’m usually the one bringing it up, it’s weird to see him acknowledge it for once. Seeing how careful he is about bringing it up, can I say that we’re close enough that he cares about my feelings? Wait no. Okay y/n let’s not be pathetic now. You are better than that. No need to grasp at crumbs. 
“It wasn’t really a choice. I think you can agree with me on this, it was more like a virus. You just kinda plagued my mind that night and you never left after that.”
“I literally just talked about Gahyeon though, you didn’t hear anything about me unless you’re not telling me something. ”
“I told you everything but there is something called reading between the lines, you wouldn’t get it,” I answered. He doesn’t need to know that the love in his eyes sparked me back to life because I wanted to feel like that about something or someone again. I smiled at him and jokingly added, “But I will say I liked you from that night but after getting to know you I really~ like you now. ”
“Whatever,” he rolled his eyes with a chuckle.
5 notes · View notes
zarcake-writes · 4 years
Text
Rodrak
Tumblr media
Here's a winter holiday story featuring a rather handsome orc spending his first Christmas with his partner.
Warnings: Fluff and Christmas stuff 
The cabin is warm and cozy. There’s a fire burning in the fireplace and the air smells sweet, a perfect mixture of the cookies cooling on the kitchen counter and the fresh pine tree in the living room. Above the chimney are two stockings, both are filled with a random assortment of gifts and sweets. Outside, the snow is falling slowly. It’s the first white Christmas you’ve ever had, and it’s beautiful.
“Babe,” comes a voice behind you.
You turn away from the window and smile at your boyfriend, Rodrak. He’s an orc, broad and tall, with long hair that’s pulled into a messy bun at the nape of his neck. He’s wearing sweatpants and a tank top with splits in the sides. Intricate tattoos cover his right arm, shoulder, and part of his chest. There’s a Santa hat on his head.
Rodrak is standing next to a partially decorated Christmas tree that is his approximate height, holding a star and angel in his hand. The tree is covered in lights, some are clear and the rest is a pretty shade of pink. At his feet is an opened box of ornaments.
“Yeah?”
“Which goes on the top? A star or angel?”
“Either.”
He frowns and looks back at the ornaments. “Do they have different meanings?”
You take a moment to think then walk towards him. “I think they both have religious meanings. An angel is obviously Christian. But the star… maybe it’s supposed to be the star that the wise men followed. We’ll use the star.”
He nods and puts the angel away. “So, why the tree? Does that mean anything?”
“Not to Christians. I think it’s a variation of a yule log.”
He nods. “We use a yule log, or something like that, in my clan.”
“Really?”
“Yup. In the old days, before technology and heating systems, every family would need to keep a fire burning all winter long in their homes. The log was usually the first thing to burn, but now we just decorate it. Kind of like what you do with this tree. The Chief of a stronghold usually keeps a fire burning all winter though.”
“Why only the Chief?”
“Tradition, but each hold is different. My uncle kept the fire burning all winter, he took it very seriously. Throughout the winter the kids and elderly in the stronghold would sleep near the fire. And he was there most nights, keeping the fire burning.”
“If he wasn’t there?”
“Then my aunt or one of his kids were there. My mother and father helped a couple of nights too. Why are there lights on the Christmas tree?”
“I don’t know.”
Rodrak turns to you and frowns. “You don’t know? How do you not know?”
“I’m not Christian, babe. Most of Christmas is just commercialized. The lights just make the tree pretty.”
“Then, why do you celebrate it?”
You stop and think. “I… I don’t know. I remember my family staying up until midnight on Christmas Eve and opening gifts. And sometimes there were fights, but I remember being around everyone and being so happy. Even when I got older and the lure of gifts wasn’t as enticing, but I enjoyed staying up with my family.”
“So, it’s a traditional thing, then?”
“Yes.”
He nods and pulls a couple of reindeer ornaments out of the box. “Some clans eat reindeer during this time.”
You snort and place the ornament on the tree. “Poor Rudolph.”
Rodrak laughs and pulls out a bulb. “I saw that when I was younger. It was on tv and I didn’t really know what it was about. I remember asking my mom if Santa was going to visit us.”
“What did she say?”
“She said that’s a Christian thing and that Santa doesn’t visit us. Then she said that even if he did visit us, the only thing I would get is coal.”
You laughed louder than you meant to. “Your mom did tell me how bad you were as a kid.”
“I wasn’t that bad, just curious.”
“Babe, you helped shave your uncle’s beard.”
“Yeah, but my cousins and sister helped.”
“But who was the mastermind?”
Rodrak did his best to hide the smirk on his face and refused to look at you.
“Yeah,” you laughed, “That’s what I thought.”
Rodrak wrapped an arm around your waist and pulled you to the couch. “What about you, love? Did you ever get any coal in your stocking?”
“No, because I was a good kid.”
Rodrak lifted an eyebrow. “Really?”
“Yes.” You tapped his nose. “Plus, I was too smart to get caught doing bad shit.”
“Sneak.”
“I am the sneakiest.”
“That’s how you stole my heart. Snuck right into my life and took it before I knew what was happening.”
You blush and look away. Stereotypes paint orcs as being brutish and hard, with no time for romance or love. But those are wrong, so very wrong because orcs are romantic in their own ways. And Rodrak, he’s the most romantic person you’ve ever dated. From this trip he took you on, to the sweet declarations of love, the man can make any romcom look stupid.
Rodrak laughs at your reaction. His hand cups your chin and he angels your face up. He gives you a smile that makes your heart skip a beat. The love in his eyes never fails to make your chest swell with warmth. His hands-on you, so sweet and gentle, leaves tingles and bumps along your skin.
He leans in and presses a soft kiss to your lips. His lips are soft and taste faintly of the sugar cookies you both made. His tusks rub against your face. They’re smooth and the tips are dull. As intimidating as they appear, nothing about them scares or worries you. It’s a comfort when they rub against your face.
You try to deepen the kiss, but Rodrak pulls away. He gives you a smirk and ignores the pouty look on your face.
“Come on love, let’s finish the tree. Then we can do as much nasty stuff as you want.”
You let out a long sigh. “Fine.”
Rodrak stands and helps you up. He gives you a small tap on the ass when you walk towards the tree. “Dramatic.”
You feign an insulted gasp. “Says the one who had to show off during your Honor the Dead festival.”
Rodrak huffs at the mention of that day. The Honor the Dead festival is an orc holiday that commemorates and remembers their dead. It’s a week-long event that begins November first. Rodrak explained that it is an ancient holiday, originally celebrated to remember every orc that died. From ancient warriors and Chiefs to modern orcs that pushed for social change, they all are remembered.
Rodrak took you to his clan hold to visit during the week-long festival. His family was very excited to meet you and the time you spent with them was fun. Instead of a somber event, the entire hold was buzzing with life. Stories were told about the dead, games were played, and offerings were made. However, there was an incident during the pumpkin throwing contest.
Rodrak grabs a bulb out of the box and frowns at you. “I wasn’t showing off.”
“You insisted you can throw more pumpkins that anyone else.”
“So?”
“Babe, you spent an hour painting them to resemble your cousins and friends. And then you destroyed all ten good pumpkins. It was a huge mess!”
Rodrak gives you a look. “You’re supposed to be on my side.”
“I am on your side, love. But it was a gross mess. Pumpkins guts were everywhere. I had some in my hair.”
Rodrak snorts and nods. “Yeah, you did. But I had to do that.”
“Why?”
“For you. I had to show off for you. It’s an orc thing.”
“What?”
“When we bring someone home, a potential partner, we need to prove to our family that we can protect our partner. That we’re serious about them.”
You look up at Rodrak and smile. “You’re serious about me then?”
“Oh, sweetheart, I’m deadly serious about you.”
You snort and bump him with your hip. “Dork.”
Rodrak and you spend the next thirty minutes decorating the tree and goofing off. He was very meticulous on where the ornaments were placed. Some of them he didn’t want on the tree, like the random religious ones or the few that you both didn’t understand. Some he said were too ugly to be placed on the tree.
“What does Noel have to do with Christmas? What did she do?”
You look up at him and frown. Noel? Who is he talking about? “What?”
Rodrak holds out a glass ornament for you to see. It’s white but the word Noel is a sparkly silver color. You forgot about that ornament. It was a gift from your grandma at some point.
“This,” Rodrak repeats, “Who is she? Is she one of those Saints?”
“Ohh. Yeah, that’s not a person babe.”
Rodrak looks more confused. “What is it?”
“It was a saying, I believe, to express joy about the birth of Jesus. It also referred to Christmas time at one point.”
Rodrak nods. “Do you want this on the tree? It is very pretty.”
“Nah. We don’t have any religious stuff on the tree, so don’t put that.”
Rodrak gently places it back in its case and puts it somewhere safe.
By the time the star is placed on the top of the tree, it’s late. The fire has dimmed and the snowfall outside is heavier than before. The cookies on the kitchen counter have cooled and just need to be put away.
Rodrak sits on the couch and watches the tree. He’s smiling at the colorful lights and various ornaments. The look on his face and the Santa hat on his head is adorable.
“So,” you ask from the kitchen entrance, “What do you think of the tree?”
Rodrak smiles and looks away from the tree. He gestures for you to sit next to him. “I think it’s pretty. I can see the appeal now.”
You lean your head against his shoulder and take his hand. “Yeah?”
“Yup. When I left my hold and moved to the city, I remember thinking how dumb Christmas trees were. You go to the mall and there are those huge ones with those huge ornaments and they look so… so gaudy. But this,” he gestures to the tree in front of you both, “I like this.”
“I like it too.”
“Honestly, I think I only like it because I did it with you.”
You look up at Rodrak and smile. “I feel the same.”
He smiles back and presses a kiss to your forehead. “What now?”
“We can do whatever we want. The cabin’s ours for a week, the tree is done, and the cookies are put away. What do you want to do?”
Rodrak looks off in thought. After a moment, he smiles and turns to you. You recognize the sparkle in his eyes and can’t help but grow hot.
“I can think of something.”
“Oh? What is it?”
“Something naughty.”
You giggle. “Naughty? Then Santa won’t leave us any gifts.”
Rodrak snorts and picks you up. “Don’t worry, he’ll get such a good show that he’ll leave us many wonderful things.”
You give him a confused look. “Show?”
Rodrak stops in the hallway leading to the bedroom. “Yeah, that song says he’s always watching. So, he’s probably going to watch us fuck.”
You laugh and smack his shoulder. “Dirty man.”
“Hey, I’m not the one watching people when they’re sleeping.”
You giggle and kiss him. Rodrak hums into the kiss and kicks the bedroom door closed, leaving the bright tree alone in the living room.
Outside the snow continues to fall and the temperature steadily drops. But that doesn’t matter, because inside the cabin is warm. There’s a pretty tree in the living room, stockings hanging above the fireplace, and home-cooked food in the fridge. In the bedroom, you’re nestled against Rodrak’s naked body. He holds you against his chest and curls himself protectively around you. The snow can fall all night or forever because inside that cabin is a world of its own.
374 notes · View notes
weirdraccoon · 3 years
Text
New fic personal prompt xd
The Parent Trap AU - No Capes (?) - ABO (Omega!Bruce Alpha!Clark) Jon and Dami are twins. Jon lives with Clarkin Smallville, in the farm, and Dami lives with Bruce in Gotham, in the manor. They got to a camp. They go to the same contest because of a new school program. A camp. And Dami's "friends" (they're not friends) make fun of Jon cause he looks just like Dami, and Dami doesn't like that. And his friends tease them even more because everyone knows about Bruce Wayne's adiction on picking up dark haired blue eyed boys from the streets. "Does this mean you've got a lost family, Dami?" "Maybe you're also an orphan and Bruce couldn't take both of you" "At least all your brothers understand that, eh?" "Maybe your original parents abandoned you two on different places". 
Dami is not amused. Jon is a little scared of city mice. 
Something happens - an activity or something program related - and they get paired up. They receive some odd looks from the adults because they look alike and they constantly mix up the last names but in the end, they don't do much because they have like hundreds of kids and not so many adult hands. 
In one of their tasks, Jon starts talking about his dad and life on the farm, then he asks Damian about his life and his own dad, at which Dami tells him he doesn't have a dad
"of course you have a dad! Everyone has a dad!" "I mean I don't know him. Mother doesn't talk much of him, either." "Oh, that's sad. Dad doesn't talk much about my mom. I found a photo, though. Grandma let me have it, I'll show you when we get back!"
And oh surprise, the young Omega in the picture is no other than Dami's mother, so Damian frowns at the photo (in which his mother is carrying a dark haired baby in his arms and is smiling adorably at whoever took it) and takes his family carpet - the one where he's recording his family history - and finds the exact same photo as the day he was born.
Now he wasn't sure if it was him in his mother's arms.
Jon feels the tension and also shows him one photo of his dad, a tall grinning Alpha wearing glasses. Dami studies the photo and turns the pages in his carpet.
"This was mother's bodyguard when he was very young."
Jon agrees that, even without glasses, the Alpha behind Bruce Wayne looked exactly like his dad.
"So, what happened?" "Who knows, Jon. Mother never mentioned a relationship. Like I said, he never talks about any dad." "You mentioned brothers...." "Adopted. All of them. Older, too. And two sisters." "I wish I knew my mom. And our brothers? sisters. Well, they'd be mine too if mom accepts me. But maybe he didn't want me, and that's why dad took me." "It doesn't make sense. Mother has a lot of children. Why would he let you go with your father? Why would your father left us?" "It's not dad's fault!" "It isn't mother's either."
Dami is the one with the plan. He teaches Jon everything he knows about the family and lends him the carpet after making him swaer on his life to protect it, and Jon talks about his grandparents, and aunt Lana, uncle Pete, his dogs and the farm animals. Dami wants to see the farm, the animals, more than he wants to meet his father. Jon wants to meet his mom and his unoficial siblings, and the so called Pennyworth that raised his mom - "another grandpa!" "Pennyworth is no grandpa!"
Dami is happy wandering the farm, avoiding the Kents. Martha is worried, but Clark is absent minded. Then Dami finds out the reason Jon's dad doesn't seem to mind his boy's oddnes: He's going to marry some journalist - Lois Lane - and apparently move to Metropolis. Clark is allowing his kid to have as much fun in the farm as he can while it lasts.
On the other side of the country, Jon is having a blast. Every brother and sister discovered the plan in the first few minutes of meeting him, and they helped him trick Bruce and Alfred. Alfred discovers it first - probably when all the batkids are comforting Jon after THE CALL -, tears up a little, makes everyone swear not to tell, and has a talk with young Master Jon. They all agree that Clark's compromise stays a secret.
Jon confesses to Bruce.
There are tears and kisses and hugs and cuddles all around. Then Bruce asks worriedly about his pup, and sighs in defeat when Jon tells him that Dami went to meet his dad.
The whole family travels to Metropolis.
Meanwhile in Smallville, Dami rescues a small doberman. Lois is not amused, because they can't have pets in her apartment back in Metropolis and it seems like his fiancé's pup is not willing to leave his new pet behind. Martha promises the new dog will be safe when they get back, knowing something is up, but not wanting to spoil whatever her grandchildren had planned. Clark is worried about his pup, noticing the differences. Lois tells him it's normal on children his age (12) and that maybe he's simply rebelling against the idea of his dad marrying her - or anyone, they both lived twelve years alone with Clark's mother in the farm - "He'll get over it, Clark. He'll love Metropolis."
And so on...
7 notes · View notes
sbb13 · 3 years
Text
My brother Patrick was my “buddy” growing up. We played together always. We played legos as Nick and Laura Brick - a brother sister police team, we played Mario kart Double Dash - I drove he hurled red shells, we played Pokémon together in the back of the car on long car rides to visit our aunt and uncle in NJ, we visited grandma grace’s house together for sleepovers. He was always green and I was always yellow when we chose the colors for anything: game pieces or lollipops or skittles. We went to the eye doctor together and had a contest over who could get their contacts in faster. We watched comedians together, we stayed up waiting for Santa, we carved pumpkins, we snuggled up on the same small loveseat and under the same blanket every morning watching tv before school. We referred to each other as buddies. When I had my heart broken he wrote me a letter complimenting me for my perseverance. When I didn’t get the job I desperately wanted in 2018 he flew me out to visit him in Cali and I had the most amazing 10 days of my life. We looked at art and history and nature and went to Universal Studios and took pictures with Shrek and Donkey. I’m forever fearful that I won’t ever have that kind one on one time with him again as we grow into our own lives. Patrick has always been and still is so supportive of my artwork and my talents. Patrick is supposed to be my ordained minister and marry my fiancé and I. I love him so deeply because he has been my friend through thick and thin and I know he will always be there for me when I need him most.
Patrick is a Trump supporter.
He believes the election was stolen, and that “most people aren’t racist anymore” and it becomes harder and harder to push away the knowledge that the brother I have known and the man he is now is not the same person. It is harder and harder to reconcile with the conflicting feelings that I love him so much but I am so angry at his willfulness to ignore basic reality.
My father is a democrat. A feminist. An outstanding, sensitive, smart, well-read man, who listens to every side and who challenges you to recognize hypocrisy. He sings, he is silly, he has always told me he loves me and he is proud. He has been a role model of what it means to be a man.
And I have a brother who is his son and I wrestle with that fact and my love for him and my anger towards his ignorance all at once and it is turning into a tangled mess inside my heart.
2 notes · View notes
ghostsofmemories · 4 years
Text
Problems I’ve Been Having With Writing // How I Plan To Fix Them
Before reading this post, consider checking out the Teespring Shop with designs by myself and my friend Alexx, where 100% of the proceeds are donated to the Black Lives Matter organization.
It’s no secret that lately, working on my novel has been a struggle. I used to be able to write entire books with 80k+ words at 14, and now I’m struggling just to hit 10k in a project I’ve been working on for 3 months.
Some of this could be attributed to COVID-19, my crazy school schedule (with thankfully is over now), and my job. However, my main issues are with motivation, self-confidence, and remembering how prose works after over a year of writing only poetry. I did this under a cut because, well, it’s long.
Problem 1 - Motivation, Mental Illness, & Activism
Finding motivation these days is more than just difficult. As someone with chronic illness and also OCD, the urge to do things only when I’m feeling up to them and the desire to have a daily schedule (with writing included) are always at war, and neither of them winning. It’s impossible for me to do the same amount of work every day or week, but also hard to cope with the lack of stability.
On top of that, I’ve been trying using my platforms on social media to promote, donate to, and educate myself on the Black Lives Matter movement. As someone who uses social media (especially Tumblr, with its tagging system) to organize my thoughts on, and hold myself accountable for my writing, it becomes really difficult to manage both activism and writing on my social media - especially when the movements going on are more significant than what I have to say about my WIP. 
The solution to both of these problems, as difficult as they are to manage, is finding balance. For OCD and chronic illness, I’m trying to figure out which parts of the day I’m feeling the most energized and motivated so I can schedule my writing around those chunks of time - which I think fall between 10am and 12pm.
For balancing activism and personal social media stuff, it’s a little more difficult. So far, I’m thinking the best way to deal with it is to link my main contribution to the movement so far (mine and Alexx’s Teespring shop) to all the posts that might lean on the personal/writing side, and continuing to uplift Black voices when they come across my dash, and actively seek them out when I have the energy to do so.
By no means will these completely solve the problems, but hopefully they’ll help me find time and energy to write when I can.
Problem 2 - Self-Confidence
Every writer has issues with not believing in themselves from time to time, but lately mine have become overwhelming. This could have something to do with the fact that I can hardly get words down in the first place. My mind has been very stubborn in allowing me to come up with words that flow in a narrative way, and I usually spend a lot longer on one or two sentences than I’d like to. 
Similar with that issue, almost all of the writing I read is by, well, adults. Many of the writers I follow on Tumblr are also adults. I’m a month from seventeen, but I’ve always been told that I act or present as a lot older, so I guess I always expected my fiction writing would be as aged and confident as posts like this, my essays for school, and the research I put together for my own purposes. While my writing quality might read as a little older or more skilled than a sixteen year old, it still feels like it’s lacking in quality and like I haven’t progressed at all since my last novel (which directly ties into the next point, but I’ll get there in a minute).
The only way to get over this issue is to write and not stop because I think it’s bad. I know that. It’s easier said than done, of course, but I think that with time and a lot of forcing myself through is going to help. 
Problem 3 - The Super Long Break I Took/Poetry
The last time I finished a novel was in December of 2018, so I’ve taken a break that lasted well over a year. I was still writing during this time, but it was pretty much all poetry, besides a few attempts that never got past a few pages and a WIP intro post (sorry about that, everyone). 
Basically, I’ve forgotten how to write prose and storylines. That can be re-learned, though, which is why I’m sticking to OITW even though I’m beginning to realize I don’t love writing fantasy as much as I used to (I will still very gladly read it, though).
There’s another problem that came with that one, though, which sort of ties into my issues with confidence in my writing:
Poetry comes easily to me. I hear some novelists talking about their short ventures into poetry and how they would spend forever on a poem and how difficult it was, but that’s not what poetry is like for me. I grew up with my mom, my aunt, and for a short time my great grandma who were all poets. I was always exposed to poetry and felt a deep connection to it, which makes it simple (most of the time) to write.
Plus, due to the internet and me being me, I was exposed to the art of slam poetry when I was 13 (it’s something I daydream about, but my insecurities surrounding my stammer kind of stop me there. Plus I live in the middle of nowhere). Poetry is everything to me.
So you can imagine it’s a little frustrating that I can bust out a contest-winning poem in three minutes but struggle to write 200 words a week when I’ve been writing novels longer. This has honestly been one of the hardest parts of writing OITW - it’s harder than I expected it to be. The words don’t flow like they used to.
Combating this issue, while it’s taken a blow to my confidence, has actually been a little easier than I thought. I have to make myself write, of course, that one’s kind of obvious. But the one that I missed for so long was reading.
I’ve been reading almost nothing for the past year, minus a book I got for Christmas that, surprise surprise, got me inspired to write again. My best friend talked me into reading Carry On by Rainbow Rowell and not only is it awesome, I read the 500+ page book in under 48 hours. I can’t remember the last time I read a book that quick.
I’ve also been slowly making my way through A History Of Wolves by Emily Fridlund, but I think I need to re-start it because when I first started reading it, I was working a full time job, doing 5 classes for school, and struggling with my physical health (more than I usually am).
Reading isn’t going to make my prose read like water or anything, and neither are any of these other “solutions”. However, despite being a lot more easily said than done, I feel like they’re going to help. And let’s be real, I need all the help I can get.
Want to check out that shop but don’t want to scroll for a million years to get to it? Here it is again! We’ve raised over $100 for BLM and plan to continue selling these designs for donation indefinitely, unless we specifically take them down (though I can’t think of any reason we’d do that).
4 notes · View notes
RoseGarden Week Day 2:🌹 October 28th: Stars
Heads up! minors keep on Scrolling
“Are…Are we sure this is appropriate?”
That was probably the fifth or sixth time Oscar had asked that. This night alone, that is.
The woman applying makeup to his face rolled her eyes and applied the second fake sideburn to the side of his face.
“Yes, it’s appropriate,” she said, “We’ve checked you out for STDs from head to toe. You’re clean.”
“It’s not that,” Oscar said, fidgeting in his seat, “it’s just…”
He turned around and faced the mirror on the dressing room vanity.
“What if…what if someone I know sees this?”
The woman sighed.
“It’s not going to come to that.” she put her hand on his shoulder, “this film will be for your private collection. It won’t be advertised on our website or released on the internet in any way. We’re not that kind of company.”
Oscar looked at her with a raised eyebrow.
“If you’re worried about having a job after this, I do make up for major motion pictures.”
“Really?”
“I was a student of Rick Baker.”
“The werewolf guy?”
“That’s right. Now, hold still while I give you your unibrows.”
Oscar wasn’t entirely sure why he needed them. Sideburns, unibrows, and yellow contacts certainly didn’t seem like something the star of an adult video would wear.
“If you’re wondering about the makeup, our director is pretty…”
The woman paused, probably trying to find the appropriate word.
“Out there.”
“Oh.”
“She used to be a performer herself.”
“Really?”
“Yeah, she still takes parts from time to time. But mostly she just directs and produces now.”
“What about you?”
“Hmmm…?”
“Are you a… an adult performer, too?”
“Yep. Worked with the director a few times before, too.”
“Really? You just seem so…so…”
“Normal? Sure. Just because I like to wear cat ears while getting ploughed doesn’t mean I don’t have a life outside of it.”
Oscar’s eyes widened. He wasn’t an aficionado, but he knew one star that had cat ears as a gimmick.
“You’re Kitty Loggins!”
The woman smiled.
“Not when I’m off camera. Here, I’m just Blake Belladonna.”
“Oh,” Oscar said, “well, it’s nice to meet you, Blake. I’m Oscar.”
“Nice to meet you too Oscar.”
The woman finished gluing the fake hair between his eyebrows and reached for a triangular piece of fabric that looked suspiciously like an animal ear.
“Almost done, just hold still for a moment.”
The people of the Beacon Adult Entertainment had been nothing but nice to him the whole time he’d been here. A far cry from the temple of debauchery he was expecting when he’d gotten here.
But still…
He’d entered the contest as a joke!
Enter now to win a shoot and a day with a Pornstar, the digital flyer had read in big carnival-style font. He was sure it was just a scam or something in that ballpark, since it had appeared in the part of his inbox marked as spam. He’d signed on the dotted digital line and beefed up his virus protection. In two weeks, he and his friends would be laughing about it, no sweat.
But a week and a half later, it had come in the mail.
Congratulations to our new winner, it said in gold foil, you’ve won an all-expenses paid trip to Los Angeles to spend a day with one of our performers at Beacon Adult Entertainment.
He’d almost choked when he finished reading the pass. What would his Aunt say?
It wasn’t like he was a regular patron of the salacious screen stories. Most of the time, it was just that he had to scratch an itch and he bought a dirty magazine with some of the money he’d saved up or watch a video online.
If she found out he’d entered a porn-related contest, even as a joke...
It had taken every bit of his guile and not inconsiderable innocent act to get his aunt to think he’d just won a vacation with no porn involved.
Now, she was asleep in a four star hotel across town while he was sitting in a studio dressing room, getting ready to have sexual intercourse with a total stranger. Thank God the BAE Agency had sent them a personal car and he hadn’t had to tell cab ‘can you take me to the place where they shoot porn?’
It’s not like he couldn’t back out. Nothing in the contest guidelines said that he couldn’t.
But going home meant they’d have to go leave so soon, his Aunt would get suspicious and that meant he might have to come clean to her about how he won this vacation.
“All done,” Blake said, turning Oscar around in his chair so he was facing the mirror, “what do you think?”
In all honesty, it wasn’t bad. He still looked like him, just a little hairier. And the false ears gave him a wolfy appearance.
“It’s pretty good.”
“I do my best. But you might want the brace yourself.”
Blake walked to the other side of the room and took a book from out of her bag.
“The director should be here any minute?”
Oscar frowned.
“Why would I need to brace—“
“Hell-ooo!”
A tall woman with a pair of aviator sunglasses and blonde hair as generous as her busom burst into the room with a sing-song shout. Judging by the t-shirt that read ‘trust me, I’m a director’ Oscar could probably guess who this was.
“So where’s our newest star?”
Blake pointed to where Oscar sat and the boy shrunk as the woman gazed at him from over the tip of her sunglasses.
“Well, aren’t you just the cutest little thing.”
The director pinched his cheek and Oscar felt the distinct need to commit seppuku.
“And, I think I have just the girl for you.”
“Yang,” Blake sighed, “Don’t do this again.”
“Do what?”
“This whole…matchmaker thing. Winter almost quit because of you.”
“But she didn’t.”
“I’m still surprised she and Qrow didn’t kill each other.”
“John Boorman did the same thing on Excalibur with Nicol Williamson and Helen Mirren.”
“Boorman didn’t need his actors to have sex with each other.”
The woman, Yang, waved her hand dismissively.
“Details, details…”
Yang grabbed (as in, physically picked him up like a package) Oscar and sat him down in the hallway.
“So, kid, you ready to get your mind blown?”
“No.” Oscar said, only half sure that was his answer.
“Perfect!” Yang said, ushering him in the direction of what he assumed was the set.
“I know you’re nervous,” she said, “that’s natural. You read the script?”
“Yeah, it’s…”
“Garbage, I know. Just give it your all and don’t worry about how you look. And before I forget, here’s your stage name. We were a little short on time, but I think we came up with something that suits you.”
The director, Yang, handed him what looked like a business card, which Oscar took. Half a second later, he stared at her, incredulous.
“Pino Largo!?”
“Oh, come on!” Yang said, slapping him on the back, “Everyone has names like that in this biz.”
“But why do I need a stage name? You’re not releasing this!”
Yang stopped and turned to look at him, confused.
“We’re not?”
Oscar shook his head.
“No!”
Yang recovered in record time.
“Well, we didn’t advertise a new release anyway. No skin off our nose.”
                                                        🌹 🌹 🌹
The story was simple. A filthy take on little red riding hood where Little Red fucked the wolf’s brains out. Oscar was just thankful he didn’t have to wear an old lady nightgown for his part. Just be ruefully naked under the sheets in a room full of people in a mock woodland cottage bedroom.
He shivered.
Did Yang have to pick a filming locale that was so drafty? If it wasn’t for the bedclothes, he’d be freezing his butt off.
“Sorry I’m late!”
A voice off to Oscar’s left caught his ear and he turned to see who it was. It sounded familiar.
Oscar turned his head enough to see a woman in a red jacket was hugging Yang. When she finally pulled away, Oscar could see her face.
Ruby Rose.
He was shooting a porno with Ruby Rose.
Suddenly, Oscar’s throat felt like a desert and his stomach like a butterfly habitat.
Of all the adult actresses he would have to appear in a film with, it had to be with the one he’d been crushing on since the first time he’d seen her in the swimsuit issue of a magazine!
When Oscar had told himself that he didn’t follow adult entertainment, he may not have been being completely honest with himself.
With her petite cutie pie looks and Hot Topic style, she was easily the most gorgeous creature he'd ever seen. Plus, she was always so funny in her videos and make-up videos. And she also knew karate, so that was kind of cool. And also…
“Ruby! Come meet your co-star!”
Damn that crazy director! Now they were coming this way.
Just play it cool, thought Oscar, It’s no big deal, it’s just the beginning of the end of your life.
Oscar tugged the covers up over his face so that his eyes were the only thing visible. He could just say he was method acting.
“Ruby, this is Pino. He’s the one who won the contest. Say hi, Pino.”
Oscar looked up at Ruby, sweet smiling and in no way sexual. Great, not only was she sexy, she was cute and just…
Say something Oscar, he thought, anything!
“You…you have silver eyes…”
Anything but that! Ruby frowned, obviously confused.
“They’re contacts for the shoot.”
Oscar didn’t have time to apologize or explain before Yang started shouting. 
“Places, everyone! Ruby, get to costumes!”
Nice work, Casanova, Oscar thought as Ruby hurried off, if this wasn’t going to be awkward enough.                                                      
                                                        🌹 🌹 🌹
“Quiet on the set!” Yang shouted through a megaphone.
“And…ACTION!!!”
The door to the set opened and Ruby crept into the fake bedroom.
“Grandma,” she said in a faux-innocent voice, “I’m here!”
“I…I’m in the bedroom.” Oscar said. The script had said to use a fake old lady voice but Oscar had completely forgotten until after he’d said the line
“You know, the innocent angle might actually work for us here.” Oscar heard Yang whisper.
When Ruby skipped over to the side of the bed, Oscar could see what she was wearing. It was less in the sexy range and more in the cute range, with lace and ruffles but why did she have to wear it like a pro!?
“Grandma,” Ruby said, leaning in too close for Oscar’s comfort, “What big eyes you have!”
Was she wearing perfume? Was it cherry and rose scented?
“A-all the better to…to see you with…”
He swallowed. He was sure that right now he had the on-camera charisma of a pet rock. But backing out meant a disappointed aunt, so he might as well soldier on.
“My dear.”
If Ruby noticed the tremor in her voice, she gave no sign of it.
“And Grandma, what big ears you have!”
“All the better to hear you with.”
He hoped that nobody would notice how he didn’t add ‘my dear’ to that last line. He had like fifteen minutes alone with the script, so he hoped the crew would cut him a break.
“And Grandma…”
Here it comes, Oscar thought, the most embarrassing part of the script. Whoever wrote it deserves to be dipped in batter and deep fried! Ruby gripped the bed covers and Oscar braced himself.
“What a big…”
The moment the covers came off, Oscar fought down the urge to cover himself. No one’s going to see this, he told himself. When it’s over and they’ve given him a copy, he would find a dark place in the woods, bury it, and then never speak of this again. And from the expression on Ruby’s face, Oscar thought she’d appreciate that course of action.
“Oh…”
Oh? What was oh? Was that a good ‘oh’ or a bad ‘oh’?
“Oh my…”
What was she doing? Right now, she was just looking confused.
“That…that is a big cock.”
“What?”
Oscar looked down at himself. He’d always thought he was normal sized.
“I just…”
Ruby put hand on her head and chuckled.
“I kind of wish I could take a picture.”
Oscar sat up, intrigued by his co-star’s change in demeanor.
“Really?”
“Uh-huh. I didn’t know what I was expecting when we had that contest, but whoa!”
“Well, is it…is this okay?” Oscar asked hesitantly, shifting in his seat, “if you don’t want to do this, I get it.”
An amused smile turned up the right side of Ruby’s mouth.
“That's sweet of you, but don't worry. I’ve got enough talent for both of us.”
“Oh. Well that’s probably good, because…”
Oscar steeled himself. Of all the ways he could have pictured admitting this to a girl, this wasn’t one of them.
Because it’s…”
He said it quietly, hoping he wouldn’t have to repeat it. Ruby frowned.
“What was that?”
He repeated it, only slightly louder.
“One more time.”
“ I said…it’s…it’s my first time.”
For a moment, Ruby stared at him, and Oscar feared the worst. Before he could calculate where this situation fell on a scale of one to dying from embarrassment, Ruby covered her eyes and squealed loud enough to make Oscar jump.
“What!? What is it?”
“You’re just…so cute! With your wolf ears and your blushing and your big cock and…”
“This isn’t in the script but it is GOLD!” Yang whispered from offset.
Or at least Oscar thought that’s what he heard Yang say, but he was still hooked on what Ruby had called him.
Cute? Well, that was a boost to his self-confidence. It wasn’t every day a woman complimented your anatomy and said you were cute in the same conversation.
“Well, while we’re being honest,” said Oscar, “I’ve had a crush on you for a while now.”
Ruby blushed and fidgeted and Oscar’s heart went pitter pat.
“Oh really?”
“Yeah. I watch your interviews and read articles about you and I…um…
“It’d be a lie if I didn’t tell you I never… caught myself thinking about him when I shouldn’t.”
“Oh?”
Ruby crawled onto the bed, leaning forward into his personal space and Oscar felt his throat tighten, but in a good way.
“Then, what kinds of things does Mister Wolf think about Little Red?”
For a moment, Oscar’s mind went blank before a laugh finally burst from his throat, a laugh which Ruby caught.
“We’re not exactly staying in character here.” Ruby chuckled.
“It’s not going to be released anyway.” Oscar said.
Ruby smirked, her lips a hair’s breath away from the left side of his mouth.
“Well in that case…”
“WE’VE RENTED THIS PLACE FOR A LITTLE OVER TWO HOURS!” Yang shouted through her bullhorn, “LET’S SEE SOME ACTION!”
That was certainly a mood killer. Couldn’t that director just leave the cameras running and buzz off? It’s not like this was going to make anyone any money.
“I’m gonna do it!”
Oscar turned to the sound of Ruby's voice. His co-star had a look of iron resolve on her face.
“I’m gonna give you the ride of your life!”
Before he could respond, Ruby tackled him onto the mattress, smashing their lips together. Oscar's mind, meanwhile, was reeling, not able to form a cohesive question, let alone think through the sensations this girl on top of him was sending by running her hands up and across his exposed skin. Maybe he didn't have anything to worry about…
                                                       🌹 🌹 🌹
I Might do a mature version on AO3 later. Sorry this is so freaking late.
22 notes · View notes
a-cai-jpg · 4 years
Text
this is a very stilted post.
I have a collection of songs that make me cry.
I'm not in the habit of playing them very often. I don't even save them in my YouTube favorites, or my wormhole of a Spotify account. I kind of leave it up to fate for the familiar melody and lyrics to find me again, and on days where I feel especially brave, I'll queue it up on a drive. But only on a drive.
I watched a variety show about songwriters a few months back, and one of my favorite contestants said something along the lines of, "I think everyone has a theme that they just can't touch."
Sometimes, it's because the pain is still too raw. Sometimes, it's because we're too fearful to truly reckon with the sorrow, unwilling to drink it in, let it roll around in our mouths as the bitter flavor penetrates our tongue, and feel it burn on the way down.
I don't listen to the songs often because I'm afraid I'll become desensitized, that the most humane and most compassionate part of me will become numb.
But also because I'm not in the business of seeking out pain.
I used to be obsessed with tragedy, chasing it with a sort of masochistic relish because I thought you could never be as human as you were when you cried. It's kind of like why people really like those sad, touching Thai commercials that make you bawl your eyes out without fail every time.
But as I grew older, I realized there really is something that I can't touch. Sometimes, I tongue the edges of it, prodding with caution, but only on very, very rare occasions do I peel away the protective layer. There are some things I can't watch, can't listen to too closely, or else I'll feel myself unravel around the edges.
And not gonna lie, but now is not a time I'm willing to tug at the ends of the thread. So instead, I'll let a past me do that.
When I was a sophomore in university, I submitted a monologue for the annual Asian cultural show. It was submitted anonymously, because at the time, it wasn't something I was ready to talk about.
(it still isn't, but i have gotten more practice talking about it in the years that have elapsed.)
See, what had happened was, I was watching Moon Lovers: Scarlet Heart Ryeo (disappointment of my life, sorry the Chinese version is better even though the Korean cast is bEaUtIfUl), and suddenly, I had a mini-panic attack about death.
It was the dumbest thing. I was watching Park Soondeok try to woo Wang Eun, and the silly girl--bless her heart--hunted a whole bear to express her love for him. I remember the scene had startled me, because she popped on screen with a bear skin covering her body. And I was like, "Uh that's like, a lot of bad karma right."
And I don't really know how karma works, but I suddenly remembered something that my grandmother had said a long time ago. She said that she was a sinner, because she's "killed" so much for our family.
In Chinese, the words she used were 杀生, which literally means "kill life" but generally, animal life.
She said it because she is the main chef of our family. Whenever she visited China, our family would go through a bit of crisis because that meant either my grandfather cooked or my mom's boyfriend cooked.
Once, my grandfather served me Palmier cookies and the same fried rice we'd eaten for a week for dinner. Often, my mom's boyfriend chopped up carrots and celery to dip with ranch for dinner.
It was great.
(no, but our family barely functioned when my grandmother was gone. those six months would be us sitting silently around the dinner table, daring each other to be the first to try a dish.)
Weirdly, that little thing she said stuck with me. And in that moment, sophomore year of college, sitting in my top bunk watching Scarlet Heart Ryeo, I panicked.
I can't really dissect why I panicked. But the result was this ridiculous plan that I had to stop eating meat for the rest of my life to collect all the good karma for my grandmother.
(yeah, so that didn't last because I literally got sausages that weekend cus hello, continental breakfast.)
It wasn't that I never thought about death or my family members dying before then. In the second grade, I read a story about the friendship between a squirrel and a leaf, and cried and cried and cried when the story ended and the leaf died, not because the leaf died but because the leaf promised to be reborn, and would be reborn at the turn of the year, but humans wouldn't be.
But for some reason, all of the separate moments of panic and fear dispersed over a decade culminated in that moment, as I watched Soodeok pull the bearskin off of her head, and I started crying so hard I couldn't breathe.
So I wrote a monologue. The original draft was very, very long and very, very detailed, and I probably went through half a box of tissues writing it. I eventually cut it down and didn't save the first copy because I never wanted to read it again.
The theme of the monologue comes up every time I talk about my Chinese American identity. It comes up in personal statements, in creative narratives, in discussion groups, and in the Facebook likes I dish out whenever I see a relevant Subtle Asian Traits post. It's the sense of biculturalism and the accompanying endeavor to somehow reconcile my reality with that of my immigrant parents and grandparents. It's the weary acceptance that ultimately, there may be no reconciliation, and all that's left is regret.
Whenever someone asks me what my favorite food is, I would say spring onion noodles. But this is the funny part--I will never order them in a restaurant. Some time in middle school, I went on a family trip with my extended relatives in China. Every time we stopped to eat, my aunt would order me a bowl of spring onion noodles because she knew I loved it so much, and every time, I would make a face and say, "Grandma does it better."
See, I don't know if she actually does. I just knew I liked hers more.
After my grandmother returned to China, I started making spring onion noodles myself, because it tasted more like home even if I never got it right.
I also really like dumplings. My grandma makes the best dumplings, but I'm afraid to ask her to make them, because the last time I did, they were too salty. Now, I'm afraid to ask her to make spring onion noodles too, because maybe my memories tasted better than the real thing.
But the real, real reason I'm scared is that I'm scared she's getting old. I'm scared her tastebuds are not the same as they were when she lived in Monterey Park, cooking in our second floor kitchen.
In my senior year of college, I called my grandmother for the first time on my own. The moment I heard her voice, staticky over the long distance call, I started crying, and it was stupid because I had to pretend I wasn't crying and I was trying to talk normally and it was awful because it was the kind where your voice came in hiccupy stutters, and she definitely knew I was crying because she kept asking, "Why did you call? What's wrong?" while acting casual, for my sake.
When I was in the eighth grade, I was walking a friend's German Shepherd that ended up dragging me across the pavement in the park. It's a story I tell a lot, because it is truly hilarious in hindsight, but the ending goes like this:
I go home crying, because my glasses broke and I have cuts on the back of my left hand and down my face. I take a bath, something I grew out of doing years ago, and my grandmother doesn't reprimand me. She sits next to me and speaks in that vaguely disapproving voice of her, the tone of so many old Asian ladies, and tells me that life is hard and you will meet people that you don't get along with, but you just have to suck it up. And I start crying harder, because she cared.
That day, she also followed me from the front door of our house to my mom's master bathroom, asking, "What's wrong?"
We talk a lot about the Chinese zodiac in our household, more when my grandmother and grandfather still lived with us, but my aunt brought it up a few days ago. In the Chinese zodiac, the ox and the sheep are foils to each other--me and my grandmother. When I was little, I would say, "Ugh, this is why we fight so often." A few days ago, my mom said, "That's why you and grandma never got along," and I stayed silent.
I sometimes tell people that my grandmother is more like my mother figure, and my mom is more like an older sister. And my mom hates it. But, it's because everything that others associate with an Asian mom, I associate with my grandmother. All the memes about immigrant mother bringing their children peeled and cut fruit are about my grandmother, fending off my complaints about having to eat apples every single day, and stubbornly bringing me sliced apples and pears. All the stories about immigrant parents expressing their love through the words "Come eat. Food is ready," is my grandmother who singlehandedly kept her family together through sheer will and a kitchen stove.
Sometimes, when I'm brave enough to talk to people about how I feel about her, I would say that I would gladly give her half of the rest of my life, just so we can leave together. I'm scared her life would be less than perfect, and I wish I made money earlier so I can take her to Cambridge and Rome, but I'm also scared that I'm selfish and weak and unable to give her what she really wants.
Anyways.
Four tissues later, here's the monologue:
I am obsessed with time.
I am obsessed with time, but I hate the way the second hand moves relentlessly in an endless loop on the face of an old clock. I am obsessed with time, but I hate the way the mention of it tightens my throat, squeezing until the pressure travels to my heart and lungs, and finally settling somewhere deep in my gut.
I was told that time is linear. The Second Law of Thermodynamics. Chaos and disorder grow infinitely—there is no going back.
When I was little and time was but a tiny grain of sand in a large, foreboding hourglass, I believed in guardian angels. They were the ones who caught me tumbling from a swing, having flown too high on my too weak wings. They were the ones who waited outside the gates of my elementary school—a familiar face of comfort floating amidst a crowd of foreign visages. They were the ones who promised me plates and plates of hand-wrapped dumplings, and most importantly, they were the only ones who could cook spring onion noodles with a sunny side up egg the way I liked it, and no restaurant could ever hope to get the taste just the same.
But also, when I was little, I believed that guardian angels existed outside of time. They were immortal, they gave me life. But as the number of years they conferred to me increased, they seemed to become more and more human.
Sometimes, I’d blink, and for a terrifying moment, I’d catch glimpse of an elderly couple, backs hunched and hair splattered with grey, standing in my kitchen.
This is me, a girl obsessed with time. I had the liberty of being born and raised in the United States. My Chinese immigrant parents labored long days at work, and my grandparents were given the roles as my primary caretakers.
My grandfather was the quiet one, a retired electrical engineer who made it his mission to somehow teach me to love mathematics. My grandmother was the loud one, previously a librarian—the irony, I know—who never went to college but could calculate prices of groceries faster than I could pull out a calculator. I grew up dancing around their peculiar dynamic, seesawing back and forth between going ant-watching with my grandfather as I recited the Chinese timestables and trying to finish too many platters of food my grandmother piled in front of me as she told me stories of life back in China—in the good old days.
Growing up in California, it was inevitable that I saw the United States as home to both me and my family. It was where I had spent nearly two decades of my life—and where my mother, grandmother, and grandfather had spent nearly two decades of their lives.
And yet, two decades was not nearly enough time. Space could not be reconciled, and time was rendered obsolete.
Home, for them, was not our little town in the suburbs of LA. When my father passed away, my mother said, “We don’t have enough money to bring him home.” She’d said it carelessly in front of me, perhaps thinking 6-year-old me wouldn’t notice, let alone understand. But 6-year-old me did. Home, I realized, for them wasn’t home for me.
The thought was terrifying. I realized that there will come a time, when I’d return home, and it wouldn’t be the same place my mother, my grandmother, and my grandfather returned to.
I began to play with the idea of condensing time and space. How great it would be, if home was simultaneously California and China. Time differences, traveling time, the Pacific Ocean would be utterly abolished, and our hearts would return home together.
But time flew by and the pile of sand grains at the bottom of the hourglass grew without my noticing. I hadn’t yet the chance to tell my grandparents about my meditation on time and space, and suddenly, my grandfather decided to return home. Time had seemed to warp, fastforwarding the years I’d taken for granted, and now refusing to slow down.
Here’s the thing—I do not wish to be selfish. I want my family to be happy—to return home—but I am terrified that my own fragile notion of home will shatter in return.
Because the reality is, home isn’t physical space. Home is, in all truthfulness, time. Time I’d spent with my family, and the years I have left to spend with them.
I’d let time slip through my fingers as I tried to come up with this theory of “home.” I’d tried to condense “home” into a condominium, apartment D, a large peach tree shading the backyard. Yet now, the tree has been cut down, and my mother speaks of moving to a city forty minutes away. What then, I ask myself, is home?
Home is the promises I’d made to my grandparents—promises I’m no longer sure I can keep because I cannot cover large enough distances with so little time. Home is the way I could never tell them “I love you,” and the regret that builds in my heart as I realize that home is a ticking time bomb that threatens to throw the world into chaos. Entropy increases. Things fall apart.
In a little bit, home will be too many miles away, too many hours away, for me to return to. Home will be in a foreign city surrounded by a peculiar amalgamation of unfamiliar modernity and history she’d lived through. Home will be on the opposite shore of an ocean I cannot swim across, with no one to cook spring onion noodles for.
I am a girl obsessed with time. I’d been blessed with a lot of time, and yet, I’d tossed it all out of the window of my second story bedroom. I am a girl obsessed with time, and I’d trade in my soul for it to reverse, so I can make home a little more concrete, a little more happy, a little more lasting. I am a girl obsessed with time, and when I wake up 2:30 in the morning, I think I can see the sands rushing down the chute of the hourglass, and the sight of it tears me apart.
I am a girl obsessed with time, and I would like to apologize to my beloved mother, grandmother, and grandfather for taking so much of it for granted. If I had another run at these eighteen years, I only hope to reach this conclusion sooner and fulfill my promises.
Dear grandma and grandpa,
I am a girl obsessed with time. Every day, I pray to God to give you a little more. How had the time flown by so quickly? Was yesterday not the day you brought me on the airplane for the first time? I can still taste the juice of the grapes a stranger had given us—snacks for the little girl—in the back of my tongue. Yet now I’m no longer the toddler you held in your arms. Grandma and grandpa, time is rushing by on a train I cannot seem to catch. Will you forgive me for reaching our home a little too late?
Love.
(i included my favorite part in a creative narrative project i did for a class in college. if you want to hear it in my voice: here.) (pls don’t click for the sake of my voice bc i sound like a literal duck. click for my grandparents wandering around hangzhou.) (also, if it is different its cus i tried to fit it in somehow with a longer poem i was writing.) (i don’t like poems.)
The reason I wrote this isn't that I wanted to pick at a scab. I heard a song recently, from the same songwriter variety show, that I had blindsided a few months back. I heard it at around 1 am in the morning, and I cried.
Here is the collection of songs:
橘子 by 邓见超
考试考得好不好啊? how did you do on your test? 有没有拿到大红花 did you get the big red flower? 老师夸我是个乖仔啊 my teacher said i was a good kid 奶奶自己保重圣体吧 grandma, take care of yourself 长大了 出息了 要晓得回家 when you grow older and do big things, remember to come home 别忘了这里的青山和路弯 don't forget the green mountains and windy roads here 记得要带一瓶辣椒在身上 remember to bring with you a bottle of peppers 还时常跟妈妈报平安 and often let your mom know you're doing fine ... 房子旁两棵树都被砍掉了 the two trees by our house have been cut off 墙上还贴着小时候的奖状 my childhood awards are still plastered on the walls 一个字一个字 好像昨天啊 each word, each word, like it was just yesterday 宝贝儿子啊 吃饭了 son, it's time for dinner 再不回家妈妈要教训你了 if you don't come home now, mom's going to be mad 这个淘气的孩子跑去那里玩了 this mischievous kid, where did he go? 找他都找不到人了 i'm looking for him, but i can't find him.
一荤一素 by 毛不易
一张小方桌 有一荤一素 a small, square table with one vegetable and one meat 一个身影从容地忙忙碌碌 a figure good-naturedly bustling about 一双手让这时光有了温度 a pair of hands allowed this time some warmth 太年轻的人 他总是不满足 the one who is too young, he's not satisfied 固执地不愿停下 远行的脚步 stubbornly unwillingly to stop the footsteps traveling far away 望着高高的天走了长长的路 looking at the far, far sky; walking a long, long road 忘了回头看 她有没有哭 he forgot to turn around to see if she's crying 月儿明 风儿轻 >the moon is clear, the wind is light 可是你在敲打我的窗棂 is it you, knocking on my window? 听到这儿你就别担心 now that you've listened till here, please don't worry 其实我过的还可以 actually, i'm doing okay ... 你又可曾来过我的梦里 have you been to my dreams lately? 一定是你来时太小心 you must've been too careful when you came 知道我睡得轻 knowing that i sleep lightly 一定是你来时太小心 you must've been too careful when you came 怕我再想起你 afraid i'll miss you
父亲 by 筷子兄弟
时光时光慢些吧不要再让你变老了 time, time, please slow down. don't let you grow any older 我愿用我一切换你岁月长留<<br>i'm willing to trade everything i have for more years and months for you ... 微不足道的关心收下吧 please accept my inadequate care for you 谢谢你做的一切双手撑起我们的家 thank you for holding up our family with your hands 总是竭尽所有把最好的给我 always doing everything to give me the best ... 我是你的骄傲吗还在为我而担心吗 am i your pride? do you still worry for me? 你牵挂的孩子啊长大啦 the child you think of has grown up now.
时间都去哪了 by 王铮亮 (this is a cover)
时间都去哪儿了 where has all the time gone? 还没好好感受年轻就老了 haven't even truly experienced youth, and i'm already old 生儿养女 一辈子 took care of children my entire lfe 满脑子都是孩子哭了笑了 all i can hear is the cries and laughter of children 时间都去哪儿了 where has all the time gone? 还没好好看看你眼睛就花了 haven't even looked at you carefully yet, and my vision is already blurring
if only... by ozi
如果可以把時間退後 if i can rewind time 別讓命運把妳給帶走 i won't let fate take you away 對妳能說著我最近做些什麼 i want to be able to tell you what i've been doing these days 希望別再錯過 i hope i won't miss it again 如果可以讓我跟她說 if only i can just tell her 願意付出我所有為了 i'm willing to trade everything i have 能換一點時間just to see you again for a little time just to see you again 別再擔心著我 so you don't have to worry about me anymore
3 notes · View notes
otakucalsama · 4 years
Text
cal’s bella x crossover pairings fic recs
hello! this is cal here (obviously) and i’m just reposting this. i made it a while back, but the links didn’t work, so now i’m redoing it. this time, i’m going to make it smaller, with more posts, instead of larger in one post. so without further ado, here is my bella x the crossover pairings fic recs. also, this is only for completed fics, so if you have a story i didn’t add (that’s complete) send me a link and i’ll read it and then decide whether to add it or not. i will not, however, take any bella x edward, bella x jasper, or bella x jacob fics.
other fic recs here
last updated- 12/4/19
s u p e r n a t u r a l
d e a n x b e l l a
i. stick a fork in her by geezerwreench / m / 7-8k, one-shot / complete
Receiving another cryptic set of coordinates from their father, Sam and Dean Winchester head to the Pacific Northwest where they’re confronted by a different kind of werewolf, learn about a sparkly new type of vampire, and meet a girl who’s fed up with all of it. Written for the 2016 Fandoms Against Domestic Violence fundraiser compilation. Language, violence, character death.
ii. ever hear of cold ones by shenandoah76209 / t / 10-15k, three-shot / complete
When Dean answered the phone it was only because he saw Bobby’s number on the ID. “Yeah Bobby, what’ve you got?” What Bobby had was a Hunter up in Forks with something that sounded like a cross between a Wendigo and a Vampire. Either one of those would be trouble. A mish mash of the two? This could be nothing good.
iii. bad medicine by bertie bott / m / 15-20k, three-shot / complete
On the flight home from saving Edward in Italy, Bella has a decidedly different reaction to finding out the truth behind him abandoning her. While running from her demons, Bella crosses paths with a couple of new ones, one of which she has no desire to run from… New Moon A/U and set in the beginning of season 10 in Supernatural.
iv. azazel cullen by t1gercat / k / 30-35k, multi-chaptered / complete
During a hunt Sam Winchester gets a vision of their life-long nemesis hunting the daughter of an old friend of his father. Will they make it in time to save her? Can vampires even be possessed?
v. she’s everything by maxipoo1024 / m / 140-150k, multi-chaptered / complete
Bella has spent her whole life thinking something was wrong with her, that there was a glitch in her brain. A chance encounter with the Winchesters confirms her suspicions. With a hole in her heart and an apocalypse on the horizon, can a certain Winchester brother save the world, the girl, and heal his own heart in the process? Takes place beginning of New Moon
v a m p i r e  d i a r i e s  /  o r i g i n a l s
k l a u s x b e l l a
i. she didn’t have time by lorelei candice black / t / 20-25k, multi-chaptered / complete
Loosely inspired by the song She Didn’t Have Time by Terry Clark. Bella ends up pregnant after her birthday and leaves her home. Edward left her. On the way she gets help from a witch who helps her survive and asks something of her. Bella/Klaus soul mate romance. Give it a chance and review please. Now complete.
ii. wherever this goes by bitemytongue / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete
It was simple, until it wasn’t. Bella didn’t know that when she became friends with Kol that it would bring Klaus into her life. After falling in love with the feared hybrid she comes to the conclusion that maybe he’s not meant to be hers.
iii. mystically charmed to fall for klaus by lorelei candice black / m / 140-150k, multi-chaptered / complete
Set during season 1 of TVD and at the beginning of New Moon in Twilight. Bella is a witch, the Charmed kind of witch. I borrowed some Spells for the TV show Charmed. It has the same base as my MCTF that paired Bella and Elijah, except now she’s with Klaus. Rewriting makes it LONGER. Done
iv. troublemaker by bitemytongue / m / 15-20k, multi-chaptered / complete
Bella Swan, doppelganger, ends up being the missing piece to Klaus’s ritual. Only this sets in motion a romance that ends up being everything she could ever want. Nothing can keep these two lovers from each other, not even a new identity.
v. untouched by lorelei candice black / k+ / 2-3k, one-shot / complete / sequels- unbroken + unclaimed
PART 1 of a three part story. Bella wonders if she’ll really be happy with Edward without physical contact and staying human while he’s eternally young. She makes decisions, she sets the path for a new future. Try it please.
vi. can’t help myself by bitemytongue / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete
Their first meeting was strange, but it leads to wonderful friendship. This friendships lead to something a little more special. But stupid later decisions lead to bigger problems. Hopefully, they get their happily ever after.
vii. goner by bitemytongue / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete
It was dark. Everything was dark inside and all hope was gone for her. The only thing that made her feel alive anymore was her brother. The dark was seeping into her soul and she was starting to lose the fight within herself. All it takes is the soul identical to her own to make her feel something other than sorrow.
viii. midnight love by bitemytongue / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete
She got what most people never did a final goodbye to her father. Moving to Mystic Falls with her Aunt and cousin Bella finds a new home. But Mystic Falls was the last place she ever thought she would meet her mate.
ix. salvation by ncbexie25 / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete
1st place Kittyinaz WC Feb 2015. Pain immobilized him, and it was only the help of his brother, Elijah, that caused him to move some hours later. But his words stirred the drive and determination within him to a new focus that would last one thousand years. “We will bring her back, brother. And we will avenge her. Always and forever, that was our pledge. And we will stick to it.”
x. reaper twins by bitemytongue / m / 85-90k, multi-chaptered / complete / sequel- the reaping of new orleans
Bella’s life is going smoothly after the Cullen’s left, until she finds she has a twin brother & was adopted. With her new identity comes new power. Bella discovers she’s a different type of supernatural. Charlie gets a new job in Mystic Falls, Bella moves to continue her education with her brother. Bella’s mysterious identity and powers attract attention to her. M for Violence
xi. third time’s the charm by bitemytongue / m / 8-9k, one-shot / complete
Everyone has an epic love. A person you fall for so quickly and so hard that you can see forever with them. It’s that type of love that everyone aims for in their life. I’ve been alive for 38 years and a vampire for twenty of those years. In all my time I found three loves, but there was only one I wanted forever with. ONE-SHOT Rated M for Violence
xii. lifting his curse by lorelei candice black / k+ / 10-15k, multi-chaptered / complete
Bella is 6 when she tells Klaus he is like THE BEAST in her book. Can True Love’s kiss really break any curse? Who is Klaus’ true love? Just a short one I’ve had in my head for a while… Might get bigger later but that’s it for now!I added Nanny’s POV, along with Elijah’s and Katerina’s.
xiii. my heart is forever yours by bitemytongue / m / 7-8k, one-shot / complete
Far before she was Bella, she was Isabelle the wife of Niklaus Mikaelson. After hiding for centuries from her love, she finally re-connects with her past. M for violence.
xiv. nobody’s fault by darkest original / t / 65-70k, one-shot / complete
When something terrible takes place, part of the solution is to find someone to place the blame on. Alaric dies, it’s Esther’s fault. Elena dies, it’s Rebekah’s fault. When will people realize that blame does not rest on a just single person’s shoulders? It rests on the shoulders of each person involved, but sometimes accidents do happen and it really is nobody’s fault. B/K
xv. the visit by louisaxo / t / 3-4k, two-shot / complete
Set five years after the Cullen’s left. Bella returns to Forks with her new husband and family in tow, but who will they run into? ONLY DISCLAIMER:I DO NOT OWN ANY OF THE SHOWS OR FRANCHISES MENTIONED IN THIS STORY.
xvi. on the 5th day of christmas, my true love gave to me (5 golden rings) by meekobb / m / 5-6k, one-shot / complete
Written for winter contest on BIT, prompt cozy fire. Bella develops an unusual friendship, seeks his help after going on the run for her survival. Circling a traditional bonfire, she learns all she needs is her family. M for adult situations, violance, and fun.
xvii. of wolf and man by cuinawen / m / 2-3k, one-shot / complete
Seventh in my 'The 12 Vamps of Christmas’ series… Klaus is being pulled towards something or someone, and he is done fighting it… Rated M for a little language and violence. One Shot.
xviii. sacrificing time by lorelei candice black / t / 25-30k, multi-chaptered / complete
What would you be willing to sacrifice to ensure the safety and happiness of the man you love and know is your Soul Mate? Bella sacrificed time. Bad people killed, good people killed and brought back, other killed and completely ignored… Rated T for safety. 8 chapters once complete. Review, please.
xix. a jump through time by lorelei candice black / t / 85-90k, multi-chaptered / complete
A few months after Edward left, Charlie announces something important to Bella and it will lead her to New Orleans. There, she finds not only her grandma but also a cousin she never knew she had and the Mickealson’s. When something terrible happen, the only way to change things is to go back in time…Can she do it?Rating for safety. Bella/Klaus, Review please COMPLETE
k o l x b e l l a
i. enchantress by bitemytongue / t / 70-75k, multi-chaptered / complete
With only a few months left until her graduation, Bella is told she’s an Enchantress. Bella adapts to her new magical powers, and decides to finally get out of Forks, and move to Mystic Falls. Charlie and Bella buy a house there Bella moves a month early to set up the house. It’s then she discovers her 2 younger cousins Elena and Jeremy have been pulled into the supernatural.
ii. the oracle by poohbearbms / m / 80-85k, multi-chaptered / complete
Bella loved Edward but when he left her in the woods that day he did not know the events he set into motion. Plans three thousand years in the making are about to be set in motion due to a broken heart and a desire to find who she really was meant for. With her her gifts to help her along the way the servants of nature will learn what the true meaning of natures balance is.
iii. red string by imaginary raine / k+ / 10-15k, two-shot / complete
Theirs is a story that have spanned a thousand years. He would search for her, and she would wait for him. Because no matter how long it took, they would find each other. It was their fate. Soulmate fic. Kol/Bella
iv. their forever promise by brookie twiling / m / 4-5k, one-shot / complete
They met in a dark alley. She, born and raised in a pleasure house, him, lonely and bloodthirsty. Both lusting for each other. They live happily for four years together before Klaus daggers him and Allibelle is left alone. A hundred years later and he’s free. What will happen when they find each other again? Will Kol forgive her for being with another? One-shot/ExplicitContent.
v. you’re not the one by bitemytongue / t / 10-15k, one-shot / complete
After centuries of being together, Kol has grown tired of the life he leads. In a solution to make him happy, Isabella lets him go. With a heart full of pain, she travels back to her homeland to get away from the heartache.e No longer going by Mikealson, Bella Salvatore returns to Mystic Falls to visit her boys. Only to run into the past she wasn’t ready to face. 
vi. a love to kill for by bitemytongue / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete
Kol moves to Seattle after his babysitting of Jeremy Gilbert in Denver. In Seattle he finds more than he was looking for when he comes across Bella Swan. M FOR VIOLENCE. One-Shot
vii. a shadow in the mirror by cuinawen / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete
Bella Swan finds herself dragged into the middle of things when mysterious murders begin to plague the small town of Forks. But the most obvious danger isn’t always the one you should worry about the most. Romance/Horror, Bella/Kol. *Mature Content* Halloween One-shot contest entry for Bertie Bott’s Every Flavor Spook Fest
viii. moonlight and mistletoe by cuinawen / m / 3-4k, one-shot / complete
Twelfth and final story in my 'The 12 Vamps of Christmas’ series… After the Cullens leave Bella finds peace while going out running… and then someone finds her… Rated M just in case. One Shot.
ix. fallen for you by agmdnat / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete
After her break-up with Edward, Bella found her soulmate in the form of another vampire, an Original vampire. She also discovered her real parentage that gave her amazing abilities and wings to go with it. M for some language and violence. [Kol,Bella]O/S
x. sanctuaire by buggyfiction / m / 90-95k, multi-chaptered / complete / sequel- pandore
On a class trip to New Orleans, Bella stumbles upon history like she never anticipated. Learning about one’s self is never easy, but discovering new things is always an adventure to true independence. Witch!Kol/Bella pairing.
e l i j a h x b e l l a
i. near to you by bitemytongue / t / 7-8k, one-shot / complete
A month after Edward leaves Bella, Bella is beginning to heal. She meets Elijah and with him she begins to really forget Edward and embrace who she really is. With Elijah she truly begins to love. ONE-SHOT
ii. eternal love by bitemytongue / t / 6-7k, one-shot / complete
Bella lied to everyone at Forks. She wasn’t human, she was a cupid. Most of all, she was the daughter of one of the most feared people on Earth. With less than a year to live she sets out on a trip around the world. Ending in the small town of Mystic Falls. Where she meets HIM. ONE-SHOT
iii. vegas by excentrykemuse / t / 6-7k, one-shot / complete
Alice and Rosalie take Bella to Vegas for her bachelorette. What they didn’t realize was that Bella would meet a certain Original while playing Poker … and would fall in love. Bella/Elijah
iv. an eclipse in time by lorelei candice black / m / 45-50k, multi-chaptered / complete
In New Moon,Bella goes to her grandmother’s in Mystic Falls. The war between Hybrids and Vampires is in full swing and it’s horror. Bonnie sends her back in time when the originals were human to change things. Klaus starts out evil…Will he change? Story COMPLETE
v. mystically charmed to fall by lorelei candice black / t / 110-120k, muti-chaptered / complete
Bella learns that she’s a witch after Edward leaves her. She goes to Mystic Falls to learn more with her grandmother. Set in New moon and at the end of season 1 of TVD. Evil Alice. Bella’s the Charmed kind of witch. Review:-) NOW COMPLETE
vi. a love for nature by bitemytongue / t / 7-8k, one-shot / complete
Bella has found her safe haven in New Orleans. With the help of Marcel she’s able to live a normal life, or as normal as it gets for her. She quickly meets the Mikaelsons, and with her love for children helps them with their new member Hope. This friendship will hopefully lead to love.
vii. the waltz by cuinawen / k+ / 1-2k, one-shot / complete
Second in my 'The 12 Vamps of Christmas’ series… A brief encounter at a Mikaelson party in New Orleans… One Shot.
viii. where are you now by bitemytongue / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete
Bella had come to her senses, letting go of the love of her life was the worst mistake she had ever made. In an effort to find him, she leaves Edward and Forks behind. Only the hunt for her love gets postponed after she has an accident landing her in New Orleans. ONE-SHOT
j e r e m y x b e l l a
i. hunting by numbers by cuinawen / t / 2-3k, one-shot / complete
Ninth in my 'The 12 Vamps of Christmas’ series… Jeremy meets a girl at Whitmore College… she’s mysterious, quiet… and she needs his help… One Shot.
d a m o n x b e l l a
i. living on a prayer by bertie bott / t / 7-8k, one-shot / complete
Originally written for Kittyinaz’s July Writing Contest. On his death bed after Tyler’s killing bite, Damon has an out of body experience that leads him to a revelation, finally giving his eternity meaning…
ii. almost lover by bertie bott / t / 5-6k, one-shot / complete
Jasper’s honor demands he takes action. Really, he couldn’t abide sitting by watching his family smother Bella to the point of snuffing out her happiness… And if helping her also helps an old friend, then it’s any easy decision when he takes it upon himself to set her free.
iii. a reality romance by t1gercat / t / 20-25k, multi-chaptered / complete
When bad boy superstar Damon Salvatore is forced to have his own reality show to up his album sells he has to have a roommate. Who better than shy girl Bella Swan? Can the two live in peace or will their secrets tear them apart?
iv. the shortcut home by kittyinaz / m / 8-9k, one-shot / complete
A meeting one night in a dusty town changes everything. Now a man becomes a father, a woman becomes a daughter to someone who deserves her, and a love is started. Read what would happen if Twilight had started differently. 
v. this left feels right by bertie bott / m / 15-20k, three-shot / complete
Sometimes life throws you a curve ball right when you need it most. Damon is asked to visit an old friend by someone he can’t say no to. When he gets to Forks, though, it’s not a family of vampires he finds waiting for him, but an angry girl who just might give his life the new direction he’s been seeking…
f i n n x b e l l a
i. all paths lead home by thedarkestfallingstar / m / 1-2k, one-shot / complete
She had given up hope of ever seeing her love again, she should have known that the fates wouldn’t be so cruel.
ii. thaw by thedarkestfallingstar / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete
It was cold, the wind and rain seemed to seep to her very bones. Yet, she did not care. She was numb anyway, her heart frozen beyond repair.
iii. speechless by bitemytongue / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete
Life had been hard for Bella Swan after the departure of Edward Cullen, but the rescue of a new friend changes things. Attempting to control her power, and trying to grow accustomed to her new disability Bella Swan starts a new life, and hopefully finds new love. M for Violence
h e n r i k x b e l l a
i. connected by the soul by bitemytongue / m / 120-130k, multi-chaptered / complete
With a forgetful mother and a father several states away Bella has always been on her own. That is until her eleventh birthday when she encounters her soul mate. The only problem, he’s a spirit trapped on the other side. Seventeen and moving to Forks with her father, Bella is closer to being with her soul mate,there’s always something fishy lurking around the corner. M for Violence
ii. renegade by bitemytongue / m / 15-20k, one-shot / complete / sequel- run away with me
Being stuck on the Other-side is worst than anyone could ever imagine. Being forced to watch as his family unravels before him, Henrik changes from the lovable boy he was human, to a cold and hating ghost. Meeting Bella Swan only fuels his anger for all living beings.
k a i x b e l l a
i. bring you back by meekobb / m / 5-6k, one-shot / complete
When Bella finds herself immersed deeper in the supernatural world, without any cooperation, it drives her to find help from an unlikely ally. Her loyalty to the only one who shows her any concern changes her in ways no one anticipates. Cover art by Bertie Bott.
s l a t e r x b e l l a
i. hacker’s code by bitemytongue / t / 10-15k, one-shot / complete
Being a Hacker is who she is, it’s all she has left anymore. That is until Bella comes across a certain Mikaelson who uses her skill to track down his brother. Working for a Mikaelson leads her to find her equal and a true friend.
t h i e r r y x b e l l a
i. holding onto you by bitemytongue / m / 9-10k, one-shot / complete
Bella had never been without her brother for long, but she was beginning to feel the pain of his loss. She needed to find someone who could help be the family that she needed, but being rejected by her older brother was the last straw. Bella heads to the one place that reminded her most of family, only to meet someone important.
t e e n  w o l f
s t i l e s x b e l l a
i. keep me warm by bitemytongue / m / 9-10k, one-shot / complete
Bella meets a boy her age who is being ignored by all his friends, and being the new kid in town means she has no one to talk to. It makes for the beginning of a beautiful friendship. One that involves, werewolves, vampires, magic, and falling in love.
i s s a c x b e l l a
i. last of the true believers by bitemytongue / t / 9-10k, one-shot / complete
Bella’s life was a bad 90’s high school movie, that is until her father takers her on a vacation around the world. Somewhere between exploring and rediscovering herself she gets a new best friend who might just also happen to be her bonded. But that doesn’t mean that have to date… not yet anyway.
j a c k s o n x b e l l a
i. give me something by bitemytongue / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete
Bella needs a fresh start, one away from vampires and the overbearing weight of grief she had. She moves to Beacon Hills with her older cousin Derek, and his new found pack. She wants friends that are her own, and to be seen as just a girl and not part angel, she gets more than she ever wanted when she meets the cocky blonde haired werewolf.
h a r r y  p o t t e r
s e v e r u s x b e l l a
i. dark eyes by metallicangel28 / m / 10-15k, multi-chaptered / complete
Bella was a witch. A dyed in the wool, wand waving, potion brewing, broom riding witch. Not that she rode brooms. She was also Hermione’s elder cousin. After finding a dying Severus Snape in the boat house, she works her magic to heal and bring him back to life. In more ways than just physically. (Timeline altered to make Bella older than Hermione but Twilight story remains as is.)
o n c e  u p o n  a  t i m e
p a n x b e l l a
i. flying away, back to neverland by lorelei candice black / k+ / 8-9k, one-shot / complete
Bella met Peter Pan when she was 8. She kept on coming to Neverland often at nights and grew very close to Peter Pan and the Lost boys. On her 15th birthday, she decides not to go anymore until she’s ready to stay. When she turns 18, she’s ready but will Edward let her go? One-shot. Review please?
a v e n g e r s
l o k i x b e l l a
i. my true self by desertdarkfire / k+ / >1k, one-shot / complete
She’s heard him all her life, somewhere in the shadows. He’s been waiting for her, waiting for her to awaken. What she thinks is a dream, quickly turns to reality. Who is this man? BellaxLoki AU. Based on a song challenge from a friend.
ii. god gave me you by darkestdarkfire / k / >1k, one-shot / complete
Loki takes two very big steps in his life. One of them involves Bella. What could they be? AU Oneshot fic, BellaxLoki
iii. let the stars unite us by whatarefilms / t / 10-15k, one-shot / complete
Sometimes a mother just has to meddle, and this is one of the times that it’s for the good of the universe. (One shot)
s t e v e x b e l l a
i. a heaven from hell’s despair by steampunkfairytale / t / 65-70k, multi-chaptered / complete
When Charlie Swan and Sue Clearwater were murdered by Renee Dwyer, Bella Swan, reeling from the departure of the Cullens, her father’s murder and desperate to escape her psychopath mother turns to the only family she has left: Her Godfather Tony Stark. Bella/Steve. FINALLY COMPLETE!
x m e n
g a m b i t x b e l l a
i. explosive love by thedarkestfallingstar / m / 6-7k, one-shot / complete
Everyone has someone to complete them, challenge them, protect them, even someone as broken as she.
d o c t o r  w h o
1 1 t h d o c t o r x b e l l a
i. is it really you? by queenvampire / k+ / 1-2k, one-shot / complete
Bella is actually another time lord, Huntress, the doctor’s soul mate. She survived, but the doctor thought she was dead, after an incident involving the tardis and a sabre toothed tiger. She lived among humans for a while, trying to find the doctor. What happens when he is put in hospital by accident, and Carlisle Cullen is treating him? Don’t own it.
p i r a t e s  o f  t h e  c a r i b b e a n
j a c k x b e l l a
i. a caribbean soul by fanpire.x / t / 20-25k, multi-chaptered / complete
After Edward leaves, Bella goes back to her real home in the seventeenth century where her first love awaits; but what happens when seven vampires are transported there as well? *Bella/Jack - during NM, then CotBP*
l a b y r i n t h
j a r e t h x b e l l a
i. twilight in the labyrinth by metallicangel28 / m / 45-50k, multi-chaptered / complete
Bella is Sarah’s cousin, and was sent to live with Sarah’s family when Charlie believes her to be sinking farther into her depression. When Sarah makes her ill-thought out wish, Bella is taken with Toby to the castle beyond the goblin city. What will happen when Bella finds both family and love in the Underground. Set in modern times with Jareth’s 80’s clothes. Rofl Sarah bashing!
c r i m i n a l  m i n d s
s p e n c e r x b e l l a
i. look after you by bitemytongue / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete
Being the child of an infamous BAU agent didn’t mean anything to Bella, she was just happy to have a father. Now, at 22 she finds that she’s happy being in love with the genius Doctor Reid. Only now she hopes that she can be forever happy with him. 
d e r e k x b e l l a
i. no more bad days by bitemytongue / m / 15-20k, one-shot / complete
Bella was never normal, but luckily for her she met her best friend who was just like her. She had to learn the hard way that life isn’t always going to be filled with happy memories. Her life contained bad memories, anxiety attacks, and some loneliness. That is until she gets a job at the FBI and through strange circumstance finds herself in a relationship with a certain Agent.
a a r o n x b e l l a
i. stolen by agentswan / m / 5-6k, one-shot / complete
Aaron Hotchners wife and son get kidnapped. See how he gets them back and who took them. This is for twilightvixxen. M for a reason!
v a m p i r e  a c a d e m y
a d r i a n x b e l l a
i. smile by jasper’s guardian angel / t / >1k, one-shot / complete
In their darkest days they found each other and learned how to smile again. Vampire Academy/Twilight cross-over one-shot, Adrian/Bella pairing. Takes place after LS and During NM. AU
c o v e n a n t
r e i d x b e l l a
i. finding myself with you by bitemytongue / t / 10-15k, one-shot / complete
Everything changed when Edward left. Bella was left broken, and after hitting rock bottom she leaves Forks to move in with her cousin Tyler. Hopefully, Ipswich will be exactly what she needs to find herself.
t y l e r x b e l l a
i. blue eyes by bitemytongue / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete
Heartbroken Bella moves to be with her cousin. All she wants is a normal life, but she isn’t that lucky. Falling in love with her cousin’s best friend is only the beginning, it’s discovering she’s not who she thought she was that changes everything. All she wants is to be happy, and she realizes all she needs is her soulmate to be happy. M For Violence
ii. all i need is you by bitemytongue / m / 15-20k, one-shot / complete
After everything, leaving Forks was the best decision Bella had ever made. There was no regrets when she left to attend Harvard. For Tyler going to Harvard meant being with his best friends, only freshman year he meets the love of his existence. It’s a real shame his shyness has been holding him back from making a move. Can a math class change things? M for minor violence and such
c a l e b x b e l l a
i. better with you by bitemytongue / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete
For one it was a lonely life. A life full of sorrow and pain and an overwhelming hate for being an immortal. For the other immortality was a new beginning. A beautiful chance to live a life without sorrow and pain. Coming together they find they’re just perfect for each other, only it takes them a bit of time to realize it.
p o g u e x b e l l a
i. say you love me by bitemytongue / t / 8-9k, one-shot / complete
They met in college, two broken hearts coming together to put the pieces back together. Only after two years and a visit to Ipswich do they begin to realize, that maybe they’re meant to be more than friends. ONE-SHOT
z  n a t i o n
1 0 k x b e l l a
i. no longer alone by bitemytongue / m / 10-15k, one-shot / complete
Bella Swan didn’t experience the normal zombie apocalypse. She was kidnapped just before it began, so her time was spent with vampires instead of zombie. Escaping she found her way to a small group of survivors on a mission. Keeping her secrets Bella tags along with the group only to fall in love with their quietest member. It’s strange to find love in the apocalypse M for Violence
t r u e  b l o o d
g o d r i c x b e l l a
i. sweet compliance by cuinawen / t / 1-2k, one-shot / complete
Sixth in my 'The 12 Vamps of Christmas’ series… Godric isn’t the only one imprisoned by the FotS… they use an innocent human girl to force him to comply… One Shot.
ii. the rescue by velez / m / 3-4k, one-shot / complete
“I Do” vs. “I Do” What is your forever like? Bella Swan is about to say “I Do” but, to the wrong man. Her rescuer is an immortal 2000-year-old vampire who will go to any length to save her. Even if they have not seen each other for some time.
iii. you loved me back to life by velez / m / 3-4k, one-shot / complete
From comatose to two thousand years. Godric and Bella learn to live, love and care for each other during the storm called life.
e r i c x b e l l a
i. an unexpected claim by cuinawen / m / 1-2k, one-shot / complete
First in my 'The 12 Vamps of Christmas’ series… Bella goes to Fangtasia with her cousin Sookie and the vampire Bill, and finds the experience exasperating, until she meets a certain Viking. Rated M just in case. One Shot.
a l c i d e x b e l l a
i. taming the wolf by jinx dodson / m / 120-130k, multi-chaptered / complete
“Get on.” He half growls with a slight smile. “You said it’d be as if you never existed…” He turns to her. “What’d you say baby?” She shakes her head as he looks upon her strangely. “Nevermind baby let’s go.” What happens when he doesn’t stop and Bella finds herself in Shreveport, La? With a wolf that has claims to her. (A bit of a dominating Alcide.) Read and Review. RATED Mature
14 notes · View notes