#photo of me when we were half way done with my back (half tattooed and half stencilled)

[abigail]

i was so brave about it btw .

#photo of me when we were half way done with my back (half tattooed and half stencilled) #and then photo of part of the studio because it’s the cutest studio ever honestly #like green sofa in a tattoo studio ??? beautiful ! #a #me #anyway might post an actual photo of my back piece soon or might wait until it’s healed idk ???

[me-and-your-husband]

body ink || e. williams

summary: you tattoo ellie's thigh. it's a bit of a compromising position, and it leads you down an unexpected road. female reader.

warnings: smut!, fingering (e receiving), oral (e receiving), tattoo guns, mentions of a needle, tattoos? finger sucking?? not beta read (i didn't even read tbis through once)

a/n: i've risen from the dead. lets chat, my inbox is open :)

e.williams

Hey! I've gone thru your page and I love your work. Especially your big pieces, they're sick asf. I was wondering if you had any openings for July?

y/ntattoos

hi! i'm glad you like my work, thank you for the kind words! i've got a couple openings in july, when can you come in?

e.williams

I can come in whenever. I'll make time for it if I have to...I don't care when, as long as you're the one doing it haha

y/ntattoos

how does july 13th at 1pm sound?

e.williams

That works!

y/ntattoos

perfect. what are you looking to get done?

e.williams

I was looking to get something kind of floral but not super...soft, yk?

y/ntattoos

so not super feminine? like no roses?

e.williams

Yeah, exactly like that. I don't have a design in mind...I kind of wanted you to design it? I'll pay extra for it I don't mind, but I saw your other designs on your page and liked your style lol

y/ntattoos

okay, tell you what: i'll draw up a couple designs and send them your way before the appointment. sound okay?

e.williams

Yes! Perfect.

y/ntattoos

cool cool. i'll send you the quote once we choose a design. how big were you thinking? and where?

e.williams

I was thinking on my thigh...? I know some artists won't do thighs so if you're uncomfortable w that it's cool!

I was hoping to cover most of my thigh tho

y/ntattoos

haha dw about it. i'm fine with the thigh. trust me, i'm sure i've had weirder requests.

e.williams

Oh yeah? Like what?

y/ntattoos

had a guy a few weeks ago who wanted a full portrait of his grandma on his ass.

e.williams

Oh my goddd. Did you do it?

y/ntattoos

...

$300 is $300...

e.williams

At least I know you're cool with a thigh 😭

y/ntattoos

absolutely. well, i've got some more dms to answer but i'll get to drawing up your design asap. i'll be in touch, thanks ellie :)

e.williams

Sweet. Have a good one :)

ellie walked into your tattoo shop about fifteen minutes early, to which the receptionist told her to take a seat as you were still finishing up with another client. "she shouldn't be too long."

you had reached out to ellie with five or six amazing designs, all of which she loved. she had such a hard time choosing between all of them, but you managed to rework her favourite parts of each design into one. you both finally came up with a tattoo design that she was obsessed with.

ellie half expected you to be a middle-aged woman with black lipstick and face tattoos, maybe even half of your head shaved and the other side bright pink. your page didn't feature any photos of yourself, just your work.

so when you came waltzing out from the studio and into the foyer, ellie thought you were the client.

"hey, your next client is here," jess said, gesturing to ellie in the chair by the entrance scrolling her phone.

"thanks, jess," you said before approaching ellie. "ellie?"

she looked up from her phone at you, completely startled by who was in front of her. a girl about her age, fucking gorgeous. there's no way you could've developed such skill in so little time.

"hi, yes, that's, uh, that's me," she said as she stood, shoving her phone in her pocket.

"nice to finally meet you," you said, holding your hand out for her to shake. her breath hitched slightly as she took yours.

"you too," she mumbled.

"i'll take you back into the studio now, i've just gotta wipe everything down from my last client." you started walking into the back and she followed you.

"cool, cool ," she said nervously.

this wasn't her first tattoo. she knew what it felt like. she wasn't sweating, stuttering, and shaking before she caught a glimpse of you.

her breath caught in her throat when she realized that you'd have to sit between her legs for most of the appointment.

she was so fucked.

she stood awkwardly playing with her fingers as you sanitized the tools and the chair, listening to you hum slightly to the music playing. she could hear the buzz of the tattoo gun from other artists in the space tattooing other clients.

in the back, an older man was tattooing a woman on the back of her knee. that had to hurt. next to them was a older woman tattooing a woman not much older than you two.

"alright, we're all set. i'm just gonna put this up," you said, unfolding one of those old-timey partitions that princesses change behind in the movies. "it's just to give us a bit of privacy, since you're getting tattooed in a bit more of an exposed place, you know?"

"oh yeah, that makes sense. thanks."

"don't thank me," you laughed. "okay, not to be too forward or anything, but if you brought shorts to change into, i'll give you a minute. if not, i'm cool with you just taking your pants off."

ellie laughed nervously, knowing it didn't even cross her mind to bring shorts. "take me out to dinner first, damn," she chuckled, starting to undo her belt buckle.

you pretended to occupy yourself with putting your gloves on and preparing your table as she took her pants and shoes off, leaving her in her black boxers, your mouth watering a little at her toned thighs.

"you can hop up on the chair when you're done. if you can just like, throw one leg over each side— yeah, like that. perfect."

ellie couldn't believe that she was borderline straddling a tattoo chair in her boxers right now. in front of you, especially. fuck.

without much warning, you slid your swivel chair almost between her legs.

"left or right?"

"uh, i write with my right hand, but i can do some things with my left?" she swallowed hard.

you laughed, "are you getting it on your left or right thigh?"

"oh, uh," god, she was an idiot. "left."

"cool. i'm gonna put the stencil on, then you can look in the mirror and see if you like it. 'kay?"

she nodded, watching you peel the film from the stencil, trying her hardest not to tense up when your soft fingers placed the stencil onto her milky skin, sending shivers straight to her centre.

when she looked at it in the mirror, she grinned, rotating her leg around to get a good look. "fuck, that's sick. i'd be content with just the stencil, you know."

you smiled at her through the mirror. "well hopefully you'll like it better once it's actually shaded."

once you had her back in the chair, you began prepping your gun. "okay, i know you've had a tattoo before, i saw that piece on your arm. so you know what to expect, right?"

"yeah. yeah, i'll be fine."

"okay. if you need a break, just let me know, kay? thighs can be sensitive." you switched the gun on.

"will do."

you began the outlining, humming to yourself over the buzz of the gun. she watched your face focused on the lines, keeping a steady hand.

"who did your arm piece?" you said as you wiped the ink away, making brief eye contact with her.

"oh, my ex-girlfriend did it. she bought a cheap tattoo gun when we were teenagers and i was her test subject i guess."

"cute," you said. "i was just curious." you went back to tattooing her thigh.

ex-girlfriend. that piqued your interest. i mean, it was kind of a given based on the fact that she was wearing boxers and looked like the idea of men repulsed her. and the way she took you in when she first saw you. like she was thirsty. and she was so fine, the way you could see her thigh clench and feel it under your fingers making you want to take her right behind that privacy partition.

"my ex let me tat her too. she was brave. let me do an entire leg sleeve my first time."

"oh?"

"yeah. it kind of ended badly though, so she probably regrets it."

ellie sighs, "that's the beauty of being into girls. they fuck you up."

"amen," you said, looking up at her again.

you made small talk as you worked. you found out that she was a university student studying astrophysics, that she works with her dad in the summer as a contractor to make some extra cash, that she teaches guitar throughout the school year, and that she's an artist herself (her media of choice being oil paints). she even told you that she missed work with her dad today specifically to come.

you quite enjoyed how she'd tilt her head back when you shaded some more painful areas, the cords in her neck more prominent and the column of her throat exposed.

four and a half hours later, the tattoo was finished, and you placed the second skin over her tattoo. you gave her all the aftercare instructions, going over the dos and don'ts. she held her breath when you didn't move your hand from her knee until you told her to go look at it in the mirror.

"holy fuck!?"

"...is that a good reaction or a bad reaction?"

"it's fucking amazing! jesus christ, that's so fucking cool. oh my god. you're amazing."

you blushed and thanked her as you watched her check it out in the mirror, inspecting it and gushing over how detailed it was.

she put her pants and shoes back on and you walked her out to reception.

"i've got this one, jess. take a smoke break," you said, smiling at your receptionist. she thanked you and scurried into the back room.

"alright ellie, that's $200."

"what? you quoted me at $350?"

you just smiled and looked at her, leaning forward against the counter. "pretty girl discount."

her face turned red as she took out her wallet and grinned. she counted out the money, laying $200 in cash against the counter.

"you gonna give the next client who walks through that door today a pretty girl discount, or is it just me?"

"actually, you're my last. and for the record, you're the first to get the discount."

she smiled and returned to her wallet, folding up more bills. after you put the money in the register, she leaned forward and tucked a stack of folded bills into the front pocket of your shirt, pulling you in close. "pretty girl tip."

you bit your lip as you looked at her. her eyes flicked between your eyes and your lips, finally deciding on your eyes. "you said i'm your last client, yeah?"

"yeah," you breathed.

"what're you doing after this, then?"

"well, a pretty girl hasn't asked me to go home with her yet, so i guess i'll probably pick up a coffee and—"

"come home with me?" she breathed, leaning in slightly. "please."

you giggled, "like i could say no to that."

tired of her teasing, her breath eternally fanning over your lips, you grabbed her and pulled her into you over the counter. your lips met and she groaned into the kiss, pulling away after a few seconds. she held her car keys up and shook them, "you ready, babe?"

she had you pressed up against the wall as soon as she kicked her door shut behind her, hands all up in your hair, lips bruising against yours. you kissed her back fervently. your hand slid down to her core, feeling the wetness through her boxers and jeans. she whimpered into your open mouth at the feeling.

"fuck, you're so wet, ellie."

"then do something about it," she said, hiding her smirk in your neck as she sucked hickeys into it.

"then take me to your bed."

she led you to her room, closing and locking the door, just in case. you pushed her flannel from her shoulders and undid her belt buckle, undoing the buttons on her jeans and sliding them down her legs, being careful of her thigh. she groaned.

"this doesn't seem fair," she said, grabbing the bottom of your shirt and sliding it off. she slid your pants down your legs and threw them onto the floor. "that's better."

she laid on top of you, caging you in, undoing your bra and sucking on your tits, trailing kisses down to your stomach. "fuck, so beautiful," she groaned. 

you pressed your knee gently into her core, "still want me to take care of that?"

"fuck, yeah."

you flipped her over so her ass hung off the edge of the bed and you got on your knees on the carpeted floor. she propped herself up on your elbows, watching your every move.

you began running your finger over her covered core, soaked so good that your finger was covered in her wetness when you took it away, bringing it to your lips.

"please, fuck, i need more, take them off," she said, bucking her hips up.

you hummed, "but i'm enjoying myself, el."

"please, i need you so bad y/n."

"what do you need ellie? tell me."

"i need your fingers, your mouth, anything. i'll do anything. just need you," she begged, shame gone.

"you're lucky you're insanely hot."

you slid her boxers off, watching the strings of slick that connected her pussy to the fabric. you laid your head against the thigh that wasn't freshly tattooed, tracing your finger through her dripping core.

"open up for me, honey," you instructed, gently spreading her thighs further apart.

she let out the most guttural moan when your tongue finally slid through her folds, collecting her juices on your tongue. her hands found your hair and pulled gently, making you moan into her cunt.

you sucked her clit gently, sending waves of pleasure up her spine. when your middle finger slid into her entrance she tried to muffle her moan with the back of her hand, but you yanked it away. "wanna hear you, el. don't do that."

"fuck, you're too good. fuckkk."

"you almost there el? can feel you clenchin' around me," you said, sliding another finger in and returning your mouth to lapping at her folds, paying special attention to her bundle of nerves.

she hummed and nodded fervently. with every thrust in and out, you felt her clench around you, a small white ring forming around the base of your fingers.

"fuck, fuck! i'm gonna— ohhhhh god—!"

you lapped up all of her release that you could, only coming up for air once she had to push your head away from the overstimulation.

you wiped her release from your face with the back of your hand and brought your fingers to her lips, "open."

she grabbed your wrist and obeyed, swirling her tongue around your digits and closing her eyes. "see how good you taste?"

she released them with a 'pop'. "i bet you taste better."

"i seriously doubt that."

"you've been between my legs twice today. i think it's my turn to be between yours. take your panties off."

permanent taglist:

@winters-fairy @idkwhattonamethisblogs

ellie taglist:

@chrry1ovr @milly-louise @dankpunks @starhrtz

@pedrobaby @urlocalgingersnap @wrendermedone @kissyslut @felsweb

#ellie williams #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams smut #ellie williams fluff #ellie williams x reader smut #ellie williams x reader fluff #ellie #tlou #the last of us #tlou2 #lesbian

[canirove]

Red & Blue | Chapter 16

Previous chapter | Next chapter

Masterlist

We are playing the Champions League final again, but this time against Bayern. They aren’t as scary as Barcelona, but if they managed to send them home, it wasn’t a coincidence.

(click/tap to enlarge)

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━    

“Let’s just hope that we don’t have to suffer for too long” Ha! When the 90 minutes end, we are 1-1. During the extra time, Bayern takes the lead, but we manage to score a couple of minutes before the end. 2-2. And we make it to the penalties.

I hate penalties. They aren’t fair, just a lottery, and I’ve always struggled with them. When it’s my turn to shoot, everything in my body is shaking.

“You can do this” Leah says, knowing what I am going through.

“I can do this” I repeat after her, focusing on my breathing, on the ball. I’m alone at my garden, no one around. It’s just me and the ball.

I barely look at the goalkeeper, just enough to know where she is. And then, I shoot. She falls to my left, the ball going to my right. Goal. I think the whole world has heard my sigh of relief.

Bayern misses the next one, which means that if Leah scores, we win. She’s focused, her murderous gaze ready. And she doesn’t miss. We have won the Champions League. We have won the Champions League!

“I think I’ve fallen in love with another trophy” I say to her after posing together with it, holding it again as if it was a baby.

“We make such beautiful trophies” she laughs.

This time, when my family comes to meet us, both Aaron and Mason are with them.

“That was the worst experience of my life. I don’t want to go through that ever again” he says, hugging me.

“Same” I laugh. “But you shouldn’t have come down here. People will see us, Instagram is gonna go crazy and…”

“And I don’t care. My girlfriend just won the Champions League, and I’m going to support her.”

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━    

When I wake up the sun is coming through the curtains, the light too bright, Mason snoring next to me. I stretch my arm to grab my phone and check the time. 10:15 a.m. We’ve definitely missed breakfast.

I have a few missed calls from my family and Eliza, the last one from just a few minutes ago, so I decide to get out of bed and move to the terrace to call her back. I move slowly, trying to not wake up Mason. He just changes position, still asleep, the sheets tangled around his legs.

“Aren’t you cute” I whisper, smiling at him.

I put on a t-shirt I grab from the floor and sit outside, enjoying the sun. I try calling Eliza, but the line is busy, so I decide to check all the messages and photos from last night. Before big games I usually turn off my data, not wanting to be bothered by anything. The moment I turn it on, my notifications start going crazy.

“Ok then” I say.

First I go to twitter, just so the big red notification disappears. I know better than to check my mentions and messages there. Then I check my texts, replying to my closest friends and family members first. Half way through it, Eliza texts me.

After I’m done replying back to my messages, I do as Eliza says and check my Instagram feed, liking some photos from last night that the girls and the team have already shared.

“There you are” Mason yawns, coming to sit at the terrace with me.

“Hi” I say. “I was texting with Eliza, replying to some messages.”

“No Instagram?” he says with a sleepy smile.

“Just my feed. But Eliza said it isn’t as bad as I thought.”

“See? You were all worried for nothing” he says as he stretches.

“Should I also get a tattoo to remember last night?” I say, pointing at the dragon on his ribs.

“Definitely. But you can’t pick a minute this time. And I don’t see you getting something like mine.”

“Correct” I laugh.

“We have time to think about it. But first, can we eat something? I’m famished.”

“The cookies are probably gone by now.”

“I guess I’ll have to eat fruit then” he shrugs.

“Your abs will thank you” I say, getting up.

“My abs or you?” he says, grabbing me by the waist and making me sit on his lap.

“Both?” I say, my arms around his neck.

He laughs, and I laugh with him, thinking about how if last May, someone would have told me that a year later I would be this happy, I wouldn’t have believed them.

“Penny for your thoughts?” he says, bringing me back to reality.

“I was just thinking about how happy I am.”

“Because you have a boyfriend with amazing abs?”

“Exactly that” I say, laughing again before kissing him.

━━━━━━❃━━━━━━    

A couple of weeks after we win the Champions League, we also win the League, and just a few days later we go back with the national team to end the season.

“There she is!” Coady says as I walk into St. George’s Park. “The World Cup winner! Champions League winner! League winner two years in a row! Best English player of the year for the third time in a row! Future Ballon d’Or!”

“Thank you, Connor” I say, hugging him. “But the Ballon d’Or is rigged. Ask Lewandowski.”

“Nah, they won’t do that with you. And if they do, all of us and the Arsenal fans will buy you one of Messi’s. I know he won’t mind, he has enough.”

“Sure” I chuckle.

The next few days are very chill, the friendly games being exactly that. Friendly.

On our last day, the staff has set a water balloons fight on the pitch where we train. They’ve divided us on two teams, those of us who wear read with our clubs to one side, and the rest to the other. At first everything goes well, everyone focused and following a strategy. But by the time it ends, it is a complete chaos. Both teams have mixed, and some have already given up after getting completely soaked. I’m running around on Tyrone’s back, Sancho behind us giving me balloons to throw at whoever crosses our path. Declan and Stones have found buckets somewhere, and are throwing water around. Like Southgate said, we are a family.

#mason mount #mason mount x reader #mason mount fanfic #mason mount imagine #football fanfic #football imagine

[umichenginabroad]

Stockholm Week 7: Travel Week 1

Hej igen! 

I had a bipolar week: the beginning of the week was full of presentations but the end of the week was full of laughter :) 

Let’s begin! 

2/28 Wed

It has been a while since I had two study trips in a day. I learned about the New Slussen Project, which is the reason for all the construction around Slussen. The planning behind the project was astoundingly complex and comprehensive, considering all social, environmental, and economic factors. 

Model of the new Slussen project design

The next study trip was a real guided tour based on the Swedish crime fiction novel, The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. We walked around Monteliusvägen to Michael Blomkist’s apartment, the cafe where the movie was filmed, and viewpoints that showed the city at a glance. 

A picture of a gallery I peeked into before the field trip

The view was gorgeous. It's not too far from my apartment too!

When the tours were over, I stopped at the Coffee House and yapped with my friend for a bit before going home.

2/29 Thu 

Today was the big D-day: a 10-minute presentation on the case study done in my core course. I booked a room in DIS to practice until class. I ate my packed lunch and finished up my last touches. 

My messy hair ;-; The sun was out and I needed a break

Turns out the presentation was informal but I guess that was for the better. 

At home, I couldn’t rest as I had to prepare for my other presentation for Swedish and read half of a book for Crime Fiction class tomorrow. I made the mistake of reading in my bed and fell asleep eventually. 

3/1 Fri 

My team successfully finished the presentation and ate the pepparkakor that our teacher prepared for us. It is a thinner version of ginger cookies with a taste of Sweden. 

As a little treat after school, I ordered TooGoodToGo at an island I’ve never been to. It was such a smoggy and windy day (especially because the bridge I had to pass was near a huge lake) but I managed to arrive at the bakery in one piece. 

The bakery had so many cute chocolate pieces < 3

I caught up on my sleep for the rest of the day. 4 hours of nap before sleeping for real at night ;) 

3/2 Sat 

Finally, travel week 1 break began! My family came to visit Stockholm while I was here. We had no specific plans in mind, so we spontaneously decided on places to go. We left Airbnb at 5:30 pm when the sun was all set (...) but we still had a good time walking around T-Centralen and Gamla Stan. 

It was nice seeing my family again < 3

3/3 Sun 

We had a slow morning but made it out of our house by 1 pm. 

Our first stop was Gamla Stan since we could not see anything in the dark yesterday. I took them to the main photo spots first. 

Happy happy happy '◡ '

If you remember this place from my prior posts, you're a real one < 3

My dad then led the way to Stockholm’s narrowest street, Mårten Trotzigs gränd. It is only 90 cm (~35 in) wide. 

I took some great snapshots for my brother 

From far away, we saw a commuter ferry departing and abruptly decided to take it. We ran and ran and ran to make it in the departure time. We found out where we were headed once the ferry steered toward the temporarily closed amusement park on Djurgården Island. I felt like I hadn’t been on impromptu journeys for ages, so this kind of random traveling brought me so much joy! The island was bigger than we thought, and it was then that my dad discovered something from the map. The island we were on was the island with the Vasa museum! On the subway to Gamla Stan earlier on, we had made a plan to go to visit the Vasa museum later today. Without a clue, the ferry took us to the right place at the right time. We were so amazed and couldn’t stop talking about it for a good hour (and now I’m writing it on my blog post). 

Since we were there already, we went to the Vasa museum. It is a popular museum with a restored ship that sank back in the 1600s and recovered after 333 years, in the 1900s. I was impressed by the grand size of the ship and the salvage operation.

I still can't believe this magnificent yet delicate ship sunk 10 minutes after its departure

We took a thorough scan of the six floors and finally left when we were satisfied. A beautiful sunset was awaiting us outside. 

Swan couple < 3

This time, we took a tram to go back to Gamla Stan for fika. Fika and Wine was our first destination. We ordered Swedish meatballs and shrimp salad as our main dishes, as well as delicious desserts with coffee. 

Can’t describe the deliciousness in words < 3

For the rest of the evening, we enjoyed Gamla Stan with street lights on, going into souvenir shops one after another like real tourists. 

I loved the owls in this store but my wallet said no to all of them :(

The past few days have been relaxing, and I can’t wait to spend more time with my family :)  They are wonderful photographers (as you can see from the pictures in this post) so I'll have tons of more photos to share in the following days. Good pictures always brighten my day <3

I will let you know all about the rest of my break next week! 

Tack, 

Jiwoo Kim 

Chemical Engineering

DIS Study Abroad in Stockholm, Sweden

#UmichEnginAbroad #IPEStockholm #JiwooKim #IPEWinter24 #Sweden

[thesmokingguns]

Second Date

You had told him this was a bad idea. Told him not to do it but the stupid fuck wasn't thinking about how it was a bad idea. ALl he could think about was when he first mentioned it you gave him this smile that was the prettiest thing he had ever seen. And even as he got more serious about the idea and you backtracked, telling him that it was too much he couldn’t get the smile you had given him out of his mind.

There he was getting your name tattooed on his arm.

"Is it too late to change it?" you asked, nails going into your mouth as you watched the needle slapping into his skin, the steady buzz of the machine as he sat there, not seeming to feel any of the pain.

The man who was giving the tattoo looked up at you and then at Slash, wondering if he should continue with this. Usually chicks loved watching their man get their name on them. A sign of a future, a forever but you were not acting like the girls usually did. The guitarist just nodded his head to let him keep going as you shook your head, swallowing another sigh.

"Calm down. Come sit on my knee." he was opening his arm up, getting you closer to him as trembled looking at the lines of your name being pressed into his skin, "I want to do this, I love you and want you to be with me all the time."

You grimaced and watched the gun go into the ink and come back up to pierce his skin again, right on his chest where it would be clear for anyone to see if he  took off his shirt.

"Maybe we could have just got friendship bracelets or something. This seems pretty extreme for a second date." the tattoo artist stopped at this point, looking at Slash stunned.

"Second date?" the man smirked, shrugging his shoulders as he turned, laying a kiss on your lips.

"I'm going to ask her to marry me on our third." and something about what he said that statement made you know that he wasn't joking about it. Hell he was already throwing around ‘I love you’ and you hadn’t even known each other for a week.

Slash wasn’t just moving fast, he was racing.

“All set.” the tattoo artist wiped it clean, letting you lean forward and look at the way your name was written in loopy script. Your heart is thundering as you saw it, a sign of some sort of future.

“I love it.” you both said it at the same time, smiling at each other, Slash pulling you into a kiss at the words.

As Slash stood up to pay you turned to the artist, trying to muster up the bravado that the guitarist had.

“I want his name, maybe smaller, but on my ring finger.” The guitarist looked between the two of you, slightly slack jawed but he wasn’t about to say no for something that would take five minutes.

“I think you’re both insane so when you want cover ups done in a month you just come to me and i’ll give you a sweet deal.” he was sitting down though, changing the needle on his gun as he set up new ink and pulled on new gloves, motioning for you to hand over your hand to him.

Slash was sitting down beside you, taking your other hand in his, kissing your fingers as you winced, hating the pain but loving how it felt to be close to the man.

A half hour later you were both marked with each other's names, headed down the Strip in Vegas thinking maybe you were a bit crazy.

“I go back to Austin tomorrow.” you said it as you passed the Bellagio. The famous water fountains pouring out as people posed for photos that would be streaked with light.

Slash seemed to think about you leaving for all over five seconds.

“Should I come with you to help you pack?” he said it so honestly you had to blink, trying to think about what the hell he was talking about. He could see the look on your face, “We’re marked up. I’ll take you on a breakfast date tomorrow, we can get engaged and we can both go home to Austin to pack your things up and you can move to LA with me.”

You wanted to protest that you couldn’t move to LA with him. That your whole family were all in Texas. But then you remembered that your Las Vegas trip for your 21 birthday was your last hoorah because you had lost your job at the law firm you had since your junior year of high school. And since you hadn’t went to college because you were making so much money there you didn’t have many prospects for when you returned.

SO you absolutely could move to LA.

“What am I going to do in LA?” you asked in a soft voice. Slash scoffed at this, shaking his head.

“Haven’t you caught on yet? You’re going to be very busy planning our wedding, honey. And after that you can do whatever you dream of.” When  he spoke to you he was sincere and you knew that whatever he was offering you needed to snatch up and take it.

“I can’t wait for our third date then.”

#slash fanfic #slash fan fiction #slash fanfiction #slash fan fic

[demetriandelibinaryboyfriends]

@ckfemslashnetwork

COBRA KAI SAPPHIC SUMMER WEEK 4 CAMPFIRE/STARLIGHT

***

Good girl, sad boy Big city, wrong choices We had one thing going on I swear that it was something ‘Cause I don’t remember who I was before you painted all my nights A color I’ve searched for since

But one thing after another Lost in situations, circumstances Miscommunications and I Have to say By the way I just may like some explanations

Can I ask you a question? Did you ever have someone kiss you in a crowded room And every single one of your friends was making fun of you But 15 seconds later they were clapping, too? Then what did you do?

Did you leave her house in the middle of the night? Did you wish you’d put up more of a fight? When she said it was too much Do you wish you could still touch her? It’s just a question

Half-moon eyes, bad surprise Did you realize out of time She was on your mind With some dickhead guy That you saw that night But you were on something

It was one drink after another Caught in politics and gender roles And you’re not sure and I don’t know Got swept away in the gray I just may like to have a conversation

Can I ask you a question? Did you ever have someone kiss you in a crowded room And every single one of your friends was making fun of you But 15 seconds later they were clapping, too? Then what did you do?

Did you leave her house in the middle of the night? Did you wish you put up more of a fight? When she said it was too much Do you wish you could still touch her? It’s just a question

Does it feel like everything’s just like second-best after that meteor strike? And what’s that, that I heard? That you’re still with her? That’s nice, I'm sure that’s what’s suitable And right But tonight

Can I ask you a question? Did you ever have someone kiss you in a crowded room And every single one of your friends was making fun of you But fifteen seconds later they were clapping, too? Then what did you do? Did you leave her house in the middle of the night? Did you wish you put up more of a fight? When she said it was too much Do you wish you could still touch her? It’s just a question

***

HEY HI HELLO, barely finished this before the end of the event!!! Was supposed to be done by the middle of last week...whoops ^^;

Anyways, remember how I said that Midnights has an absurd number of YasMoon songs on it??? WELP.

I SURE AS HELL WASN'T DONE AFTER MAROON.

I've been playing with the idea of doing something for the girls relating to Question for a while now, since you could really take the gayest possible interpretation of this song XD Like if the narrator is actually asking herself said question, then the whole thing is just a sad lesbian beating herself up for not working harder to hold onto a good relationship. Like I think we've all had those kinds of conversations with ourselves where we're like "Ugh, I can't believe you snuck out of her house in the middle of the night. Do you wish you'd fought for her more? I bet you do. Loser." Maybe it's just me because I have mental back-and-forths with myself all the time, half of which end up being roasting XD And that would be like 10x as true if I was a teenage closeted disaster lesbian, like our favorite offshoot Regina George!!!

ALSO "She was on your mind with some dickhead guy that you saw that night" is EXACTLY how Yasmine was about Moon and Hawk all damn summer while she was in France and I will not be taking criticisms at this time. Like I can just imagine this bitch obsessively stalking Moon's instagram and muttering in disdain about "this stupid dickwad and his stupid hair and his stupid tattoos and his stupid karate and his stupid smirk and his stupid girlfriend-stealing tendencies--" And then her family or whoever walks in like "Hey Yasmine wanna go get croque-monsieurs" and then she spends the entire brunch ranting about how annoying Hawk is XD And the next brunch. And the next brunch. And the next brunch. And then she posts photos in her and Moon's matching bikini out of spite.

(Also, not me realizing while rewatching for this that Season 3 is the only season where Yasmine has any scenes whatsoever without Moon present. Like if not lesbian, why follow Moon Nolastname around like a sad little simp!!! What is the reason!!! From S4 onwards, Yasmine never strays more than like 7 feet away from Moon at any given time and I'm NOT supposed to read that as gay as shit??? Fuck OFF It's almost like it's not straight to be obsessed with being close to another woman to the point that literally every time we see you, you're her +1 kasjdhuifkhydyug)

Fic preview under the cut!!! This is one of my favorite previews that I've written so far :3

CW for internalized lesbophobia and the brief use of a lesbophobic slur.

As always, moodboard pic credits available upon request!

***

It’s a formula as old as time.

The tortured, damaged bad boy with his whole roster of issues. The sweet, endlessly patient girl with no shortage of comforting words and soft touches. A pairing so natural that no one thinks twice about it.

And Yasmine fucking hates it more than anything else in the goddamn world.

Fuck the sad boys. Fuck their stupid issues, and fuck them thinking that the sensual touch of a kind girl is all they need to be whole. And most of all, fuck them for taking what’s rightfully hers and hers alone.

It was never Aisha getting the jump on her that she hated.

Sure, the wedgie hurt like a bitch. Sure, watching her lowest moment go viral was mortifying.

But the sting dissolved as soon as she boarded the plane for Paris. In a month tops, it all seemed inconsequential.

What really seared itself in her mind was the look on that stupid blue-haired boy’s face, watching with sadistic glee as she lost everything. Looking down smugly as he laid claim to the only thing that ever really mattered in her sorry life.

Well, she tells herself. What did you expect? It’s not like Moon didn’t have options.

Because that’s the core of all this, isn’t it? The truth that it feels like ripping her own nails out to admit.

Moon didn’t have to settle for her. She hadn’t for a long time.

Maybe even from the day they met, Moon could have done better.

She’s worked her way up to co-captain of the cheer squad, second-in-command only to an upperclassman with seniority. She’s the most vied for darling of every boy in school, with everyone from Brucks to the (straight) theater kids to the band geeks to the outcasts wanting a piece.  Even the girls from the gymnastics team and the soccer team stare at her during pep rallies.

And that’s to say nothing of the people she befriends at cheer meets. The kids from other schools and extracurriculars and country clubs and Encino mixers and even mall hangouts who’re immediately drawn to Moon, wanting to get as much of that hot body and infectious personality as they can.

She has a way of worming her way into you. Making you love her, whether you want to or not. Making you want to follow her anywhere, jogging to keep up as she brings a strange mixture of irresistible energy and soothing calm wherever she goes.

Moon is well-named. She really is a bright, beautiful spot in a whole lot of fucking nothing. Surrounded by a void of boring people and wannabe suck-ups trying to match her light, no one else comes close.

It’s pathetic to even try. Yasmine certainly never could.

Perhaps what always tied Yasmine’s stomach up like some kind of fucked-up ribbon was the fear that maybe, somewhere out there, there was someone who could match Moon’s momentum. Her kindness. Her openness. Her confidence. The general feel about her where spending time with her was easier than breathing.

Or, well, LA was the city of movie stars. If any kid acted the part well enough—the perfect match for the perfect girl—then Moon would be none the wiser.

The point is that Moon isn’t short on choices. She looks for long enough, and she’ll find someone to her liking. Someone who treats her better and more fairly than she’s known for a while.

Yasmine just hoped that after everything, Moon would’ve chosen better than…that.

To be clear, she and Moon were never together. Not in a relationship. Not dating. Not going out. Not whatever the hell else people wanted to call it when they walked down the hallway giggling and holding hands, or blew through summer job money to take each other to expensive dinners.

She and Moon were steamy nights in the back of her Range Rover. Stolen kisses under the football bleachers. Fingers brushing and lightly clasping when Yasmine was sure no one would notice. Every excuse for bodily contact at school dances, when all the other kids were too busy grinding on each other to see. Wandering hands and wandering eyes that they could blame on the weed if they needed to.

Yasmine always resisted putting a name to it. It felt like that would make it a little too real. A little too close to cementing a truth she desperately needs to will out of existence.

But whatever it was, it was something.

And since Moon’s been gone, the skies have lost their violet.

***

“Shhh, shhh! They’re coming!”

There wasn’t much room under the lounge couch. Yasmine wasn’t sure if that made her situation better or worse.

One of Moon’s hands was entwined with hers as they lay on the floor, the other pressed warningly across her mouth. She was submerged in a strange world of warm, compressed darkness, dangling sofa flaps blocking out the rest of the world and sealing them in.

Only her and Moon, squished into this narrow little cubbyhole and on the cusp of something Yasmine could feel was truly absurd.

Footsteps entered the room. Creaking floorboards, shuffling on carpets, faint men’s voices.

“Hello? Anyone still in here?”

The gruff question received no answer.

“All right, then. Let’s close ‘er up for the night.”

More heavy footfalls, the jingling and clicking of a key in a lock, the closing of a door…then silence.

After several seconds, Yasmine tried to ask when the hell they could get out of there. It came out as muffled nonsense, Moon’s hand still pressing her lip balm.

Moon shushed her again. It felt like an eternity before the brunette girl finally broke the silence.

“Okay. We’re good to come out.”

They untangled their hands and scooted across the milky Persian rug, wiggling out from under the sofa in an undignified, giggling heap.

“See? Told you.” Moon snickered. “The custodian guys never bother actually checking if the lounge is empty. They don’t give a shit.”

Yasmine scoffed. “So why wait a million years for them to leave?”

“Well, like, if they heard a noise, they’d go check it out.” Moon shrugged. “They have the most boring job ever. It’d give them something to do. But also like…they’re not gonna go out of their way if it’s all just ‘business as usual’ stuff.”

“Right. So you wait 10 extra minutes because you want to stay trapped under a couch with a hot girl.”

For a moment, Moon looked flustered. Yasmine savored it.

Finally, Moon smirked. “Well, that, yeah. But also those guys are always gone in 10 minutes. 7 minutes to take a smoke break in the bathroom, 3 minutes to walk to the elevator. Works every time.”

“Wh—” Yasmine pursed her lips.

Moon stood, offering her a hand. “My parents have been taking me here since I was little. I’ve had plenty of time to perfect the routine.”

She raised an eyebrow as Moon helped her up. “What routine? You still haven’t told me what the actual plan is here.”

“Wait and see, Yas.”

Moon wove her way through the dark lounge, skirting couches, recliners, and glass-paned coffee tables lit only by the outside Santa Monica nightlife. Everything in the usually bustling room had a strange, surreal quality to it, from the blank wall TVs to the tidy potted plants to the shelves stuffed with porcelain urns and decorative seashell jars.

In the dim light, everything seemed so…hollow. Tinged with an artificial neon glow devoid of any real substance.

Moon wasn’t like that, though. Which is why it was strange as hell she’d found anything to be that excited about in that still, abandoned room.

She tried the door leading to the hallway. The handle wouldn’t budge.

Yasmine waited patiently for her to pull out some spare key she’d swiped, or reroute them to a different door. Instead Moon looked almost pleased, turning back toward the lounge interior.

“What—” Yasmine sputtered in disbelief. “Now look what you’ve done! You’ve got us locked in this stupid room until morning!”

“That’s the point,” Moon said evenly. “No one’s going to bother us here.”

Yasmine tensed with dread.

“What were you thinking?!” she hissed. “What are we going to eat?”

“Relax!” Moon laughed, waving a hand. “There’s a kitchenette. For like…catering and shit. Where do you think they keep all that fresh fruit they put out?”

She gestured to an open door off to the side, the glint of tiles and chrome appliances just visible through it.

Yasmine must’ve still looked skeptical. Moon chuckled.

“We’re not here for fruit, though.”

Moon set off across the room with that flawless, confident gait of hers, leaving Yasmine stumbling after. It was ironic, really—Yasmine was always the one who led the way, and she’d spent all night constantly wondering what Moon would do next. Waiting in suspense when she could usually pin Moon’s actions with some degree of precision.

Went to show there really was something different about Moon, compared to all the other types of girls she tended to be friends with. Moon was so…predictably unpredictable.

And when you’d had your entire life planned out since you were 4, there was an undeniable mystique in someone where you never knew quite what you were going to get.

The next moment, Yasmine sucked in her breath.

“Oh my god. You better not be doing what I think you’re doing.”

Moon didn’t even look up, now perched on the windowsill and fiddling with every latch.

She was an elegant silhouette against the great semicircular pane of glass, starlight and the flashing neons of the pier outlining her with a bright glow. She looked like she had one of those auras she was always going on about.

“My parents stayed here mostly for like…schmoozing stuff, so I got really bored sometimes,” she explained, in between (admittedly adorable) grunts of effort. “Poked around in anything I could keep myself busy with. So don’t worry—I’ve done this long enough to know how to be safe about everything.”

“Safe?” Yasmine groaned. “Oh, no.”

The center of the window swung open with a creak. Yasmine glanced around instinctively, half expecting a security guard to melt out of the shadows and start yelling.

Moon laughed again.

“Yas, chill! That’s why we waited 10 minutes.”

She hopped off the sill.

The next moment she was standing on the roof of the Casa del Mar, offering Yasmine her hand.

The other girl must have stared for a while. Moon frowned, hand faltering.

“Are you coming?”

“We’re walking across unstable roof tiles we could easily slip on and go plummeting to our deaths. Like…voluntarily.”

“Just trust me.”

“But my shoes—”

“Take them off!”

Yasmine looked down at the designer platform heels.

“You want me to prance around some filthy, bird shit-covered roof. With, like, nails and tile shards sticking up everywhere. Barefoot.”

Moon only giggled.

“I’ve done this a million times. I know the places where the birds don’t crap and the tiles are stable. Follow my lead, and you’ll be fine.”

Yasmine sighed, already kicking off the footwear very much not made to scale hotel roofs. She climbed onto the sill, reaching down to grab her friend’s hand.

“I hope you know if I slip and fall to my death, my parents will sue. And if I step in bird shit or, like, some dead seagull or something else disgusting, I’ll kill you myself.”

“Understood.”

Moon pulled her down, and she landed on the terracotta tiles with a heavy thump. She teetered for a moment, head spinning at the sheer foreignness of what she was doing.

What the fuck. What the fuck. What the actual fuck.

Her parents would have her hide for a carpet if they ever found out about this. At the very least, they’d lock her in her room and never let her out again.

No mar on their precious princess, no matter how small, was acceptable collateral. Nothing that came of her living her life outside a bubble was.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay! I’ve got you.”

Moon held her in place, arms soft but steady.

Yasmine’s heart slowed. Whatever panic had been bubbling up dissipated, evaporating into the cool air.

And then she found herself laughing, shaking her head in amused disbelief.

“I cannot effing believe we’re doing this.”

Moon clutched her hands, grinning. “Better than smoking in the basement again, right?”

“Probably.” Yasmine grimaced. “Still not totally convinced you’re not plotting my murder, though.”

Moon laughed again, eyes gleaming with fondness. “You’ll love it! You’ll see. I mean…look.”

Yasmine gripped tighter onto Moon’s hands, trying to let her nerves flutter off with the salty breeze.

It really was stunning. The dark ocean waves, the cheerful, colorful flashes of Pacific Park, the distant, light-spangled hills. The inky outlines of palm trees, like pitch-black paintbrushes against a hazy sky. The soft swish of water lapping against sand. The faint hum of traffic and voices and bar music and city life.

“Yeah, okay.” She let a small smile poke through. “Not bad.”

And Moon leaned in, pressing their mouths together as naturally as if they weren’t keeping it a secret from the entire world.

She was a good kisser—had been from the jump. Always with the added sweetness of a gloss or balm, but with the passion of someone who didn’t need either to make a person shiver. Slow, sensual, teasing with a hungry tongue in all the right places. Sucking Yasmine’s lower lip in a way that always left her wanting a little more.

But it was strangely innocent, too. Filled with little bursts of warm affection, given unconditionally and without reservations. Something with a kind of magic and allure that made Yasmine’s chest flitter, like a towered damsel in some children’s fairy tale with her rescuer close at hand.

Like all the girls who swooned over their hypothetical future “Prince Charming” were idiots. Yasmine found something better.

Every time Moon pulled away, her smile was blinding. And seeing it…

That was a feeling Yasmine hadn’t been able to replicate.

“Come on.” Moon leaned in, about to bubble over with excitement. “I’ll show you my spot.”

And just like that, they were making their way across a hotel roof 8 stories above the ground. Yasmine kept her hand firmly wrapped in Moon’s, surprised to see her friend maneuvering between tiles easier than a squirrel.

“So how the hell have you ‘done this a million times?’” Yasmine demanded. “Were you some kind of, like, tortured insomniac as a kid, and had to go running around on roofs to cope?”

Moon chuckled. “Not exactly. I did have a hard time getting to sleep sometimes, so I’d go exploring at night. But climbing around up here could tire me out in 30 minutes.”

“Oh? Are you going to go to sleep on me?”

“Oh, no.” Moon turned, flashing her a mischievous look. “There’ll be plenty of time for sleeping on you later.”

“That’s not what I…!”

“I know,” Moon hummed. “But I wouldn’t be opposed.”

Yasmine’s cheeks grew hot. Fucking Moon, and her fucking ways of making you flustered all while innocently batting those pretty lashes of hers.

It threw Yasmine off more than she would ever admit. Even at gunpoint, or at threat of losing hundreds of followers. Whichever.

“So…what?” Yasmine collected herself again, trying to focus on carefully matching Moon’s limber steps. “Your parents never came looking for you when you vanished out of their room?”

Moon shrugged. “They were getting high off their asses as soon as the mixers were over for the night. I don’t think they knew where I was half the time.”

It was a simple thing—said casually, without much apparent concern. But something about the nonchalance gutted Yasmine.

She knew what that was like. Having parents who only kept track of you when it wasn’t too inconvenient. Having parents who left you to your own devices so they could focus on being fake to get ahead and then drowning the pain of their own shitty life choices with drugs and alcohol and whatever else.

Yasmine often wondered if Moon was a prop for her parents, too. Just a tool to boost their reputation at the end of the day. Proof of these damaged adults’ ability to settle down with a “normal” nuclear family and pump out a kid, just as society expected.

It didn’t seem like them. She’d met them a few times—Moon’s mom was mellow and easygoing, while her dad was charming and friendly. They were attentive to their daughter in a way that made Yasmine envious.

But no one knew more than her that a few interactions never told the whole story.

Nonetheless, she decided not to pry. Moon probably didn’t want to spend their rendezvous talking about family troubles.

“So you never get anyone bitching to management about the ceiling noise?” she asked. “Or calling the lobby panicking because there’s some dark figure creeping around the roof?”

“Well, I’m not exactly stomping,” Moon pointed out. “And no one can see me from where I’m sitting. See?”

She turned, leading them over a ridge and behind a thick chimney. Carefully, she settled down, leaning her shoulder on the concrete.

“Completely blocked from all the room windows,” she said, shrugging. “And our silhouette just blends into the chimney.”

The rest of the tension in Yasmine’s muscles finally drained, slipping off the roof eaves like rainwater. She sat beside Moon, pressing against her side.

For a moment, they sat in silence, listening to the sea and watching the dark beach. Yasmine curled into Moon, letting her head slump onto the other girl’s shoulder.

“People always say the night sky isn’t pretty in LA,” Moon said finally. “Too much light pollution. But I say they’ve never been out here.”

“Oh, yeah?” Yasmine nudged her playfully. “And what’s so special about the rooftop view of a random building in Santa Monica, huh? The ocean eats the smog or something?”

Moon chuckled. “No, no. It’s like…the glare from the fair lights actually makes it look lighter. See how it’s that hazy purple color?”

Yasmine squinted. It just looked like a dull, dark grayish mass to her.

Until it didn’t.

Clouds drifted by, the same inky black as the palm tree silhouettes. And underneath them…

The sky was a foggy violet, like the melted remains of a grape snow cone. Highlighted and traced in the ever-present flickers from the pier ferris wheel.

And what the hell was her life, she suddenly wondered, before Moon wandered into it with the watercolor paints that she washed over the world? With her silky flower shawls and her soft laughs and her gentle touches? With the ethereal way she carried herself, like she was in tune with all the energy in the universe and woven in with something far greater than Yasmine could ever hope to understand?

On the hotel roof, Yasmine only shook her head. “I don’t know how you notice stuff like that.”

Moon shrugged. “I think a lot. Pay attention to details. Must be the Virgo in me.”

“Oh, stop.” Yasmine gently poked her side, and Moon giggled. “You can’t blame everything on that.”

“You’re right. Only most things.”

“It’s such bull!”

“Is not! You’re just lame!”

Yasmine gasped, clutching her heart in mock offense.

“Oh, bitch, you take that back!”

They swatted each other until their hands ended up entangled, fallen so that Moon lay reclined on top of Yasmine. She smiled down, expression soft even in her triumph.

And Yasmine couldn’t help herself. She pulled her neck down and kissed her again.

When Moon finally rolled off, their fingers stayed interlaced. Together, they stared at the sky.

“Look,” Moon whispered. “The light pollution doesn’t snuff everything. If you really look closely, you can even see stars up there.”

And so Yasmine could.

***

“Hey, Moon! Come here!”

There was solace in how quickly Moon unpeeled herself from the mohawk freak. It ended as soon as her hand brushed down his arm, lingering on his.

Moon murmured something to him that Yasmine couldn’t make out. Some sweet nothing, accompanied by the sort of warm look that Yasmine used to lay sole claim to.

She was smiley with everyone, of course, but it was different with Yasmine. Deeper. More sincere. Showing a kind of firmly-rooted happiness—gleaming eyes that looked at the queen bee like she was the entire world and then some.

And now she was giving that to this random asshole she just met.

Moon sauntered across the sand, the orange of the campfire flickering off her. Blithe and giggly and completely unbothered, as though she hadn’t decided in one fell swoop that Yasmine didn’t matter to her anymore.

The fucking nerve.

“Can’t believe I’ve never seen that guy before! Must be a transfer.”

She opened the interaction like they were nothing more than the gossipey, boy-crazy straight girl bffs the rest of the school thought they were. Like they hadn’t screwed in the Range Rover and the Benz alike dozens upon dozens of times.

Yasmine concentrated every ounce of poison she had into a burning glare. If looks could kill, then she would damn well try.

“What. The fuck. Is your problem?”

It came out in a contemptuous hiss—enough to put the mascot of that stupid snake karate school to shame. Moon stepped back, genuinely thrown off.

What the hell was she so shocked about?

“We just kissed.” She shrugged. “It’s not a big deal.”

And the implication hit Yasmine hard, like the aftershock of a car crash. Slamming the brakes only to lurch forward anyways, steering wheel ramming your gut.

Because kissing was just kissing. It wasn’t a big deal. Something teenagers did and then forgot about when they sobered up. A physical urge that let people experiment with their bodies and what felt good and what didn’t, but nothing beyond that.

It’s only kissing. It’s only a hookup. You’re getting it out of your system. It’s a phase. You’re confused. You don’t love her.

You don’t love her. You don’t love her. You don’t love her. You don’t love her.

All things Yasmine told herself over and over and over and over. She told herself until she could will it into truth.

Because if she couldn’t, she was fucked.

And now, standing with her eyes locked with her best friend’s, she genuinely couldn’t tell if Moon knew what she was saying. The undercurrent of venom laced into it.

Because had she really just admitted that nothing they did meant shit to her? Or did she know damn well it did, and the blue-haired boy was a challenge?

You’re losing me, Yasmine. Come and get me before it’s too late.

Because Yasmine always insisted their “thing” was nothing. It was all a big wad of fucking nothing, and it didn’t exist as soon as they set foot in public. And here Moon was, on the cusp of diving into another big wad of fucking nothing with someone else.

There was a look in Moon’s eye that Yasmine hadn’t seen before. A sort of hard, icy taunt, like she was daring Yasmine to say what always lay trapped just behind her tongue. What floated in the air like the smell of fresh gasoline, all deceptive appeal and hidden danger.

But she didn’t. She wouldn’t give Moon the satisfaction.

So this is how you thank me. After everything I’ve done to pull you up to the top with me. Protect you from bitches saying nasty things about you and creeps trying to get a piece of you. Made you feel better than anyone else ever could. Got you moaning like you were ascending to nirvana.

She only choked out one simple question. The one thing that she couldn’t make any sense of, no matter how much she tried to read Moon’s expression and piece together what was going on behind those beautiful brown curls.

“Why him?”

She didn’t hold back, letting the words drip with scorn.

Moon’s answer was disappointing, delivered with another shrug.

“He was hot. And he was into me.”

Her hand drifted to Yasmine’s arm. She smiled, and Yasmine wasn’t sure if it was out of tired affection or condescending pity.

She wasn’t sure which was worse.

“Hey. Cheer up,” Moon said. “There’s plenty of cute boys here to go around, okay? Promise I won’t hog them all.”

Her teasing laugh made Yasmine wonder if it really had been all in her head.

This wasn’t serious to Moon. Kissing, sex, drugs and alcohol—all just fun weekend pasttimes she could do with anyone. Swapping out one partner for another was as neutral a thing as taking guac on her burrito instead of sour cream.

It wasn’t some desperate plea for her to win Moon back. How could it be?

The way Moon saw it, there was nothing to win. There was only whatever tongue was currently exploring her mouth, and any tongue that could potentially do it better.

No people. No significance. Only pleasure and sensations and the same smile on reserve for anyone who crawled inside her.

Not like it was a difficult feat to achieve.

“I’ve got to go. He’s waiting for me.”

Moon’s hand slipped away, on her skin for less than she’d squeezed that stupid blue-haired boy’s for.

And then she was walking away, a disappearing blur in dim firelight. Yasmine curled her lip, shaking her head.

She was the one to say what went on between her and Moon meant nothing. And now she was stuck in the peculiarly infuriating position of having Moon believe her.

They both knew it was a lie. That unspoken acknowledgment was what kept them coming back for more, despite the supposed insignificance of it all.

Or so Yasmine thought, anyways. It would seem they hadn’t been on the same page.

And now she was watching Moon leave, confident and breezy and completely fine. And it felt like a nail file being ground against her skin, scraping back and forth viciously enough to draw blood. A slow, pulsating agony, rubbing her whole body raw.

You don’t love her.

You can’t.

Except that you kind of do, don’t you?

Yasmine’s chest roiled.

Like a dirty fucking dyke. And when people figure it out, they’ll never want near you again.

But they didn’t have to figure it out. And she didn’t have to lose Moon.

“Well, uh. Hello there!”

Oh, fuck me.

***

Random author's notes, in no particular order:

I remember in every health class I've ever taken in school, they tell us one of the hugest reasons teens develop drug addictions is because of boredom. And the two biggest demographics are poor kids and ultra-wealthy kids!!! Which kinda makes sense--like poor kids might not have access to anything more engaging to do (hence S1 Robby smoking and doing delinquent stuff with the "bad kids"), but rich kids, even with a lot of money, have their needs SO attended to that it's probably super easy for them to get bored. Like we know Yasmine (and probably Moon, too) don't really have to try hard in school or do their homework, since their parents can just bribe the teachers. And it's not like they have to work after school or summer jobs to make money since they can just ask for (or maybe even steal) what they need. Probably easy for these girls (and rich kids in general) to feel kind of directionless and at loose ends, since they've never had to put in real effort to get through life. So definitely not out of the realm of possibility for Moon to get bored even at a lavish hotel that I personally would kill to stay at aksdjhsuyefigdyrj

I've noticed this kind of rich kid drug culture in shows like Outer Banks, too, especially with regard to rich kids who deal with abuse and/or neglect at home. Annalisa Cochrane said in an interview that she thinks Yasmine gets emotionally neglected by her parents, and acts out partly for attention. And Moon's parents seem pretty irresponsible and are possibly drug addicts themselves, considering her mom gives her weed for her birthday. I just think it's kinda interesting that these two ultra-wealthy girls' idea of a good time is getting high in a fast food parking lot, when they DEFINITELY have the money and resources to do something a lot more bougie and rich girl-esque. I guess the point was to show that they're "vapid" and irresponsible and a bad influence on Sam or whatever, but I can't help but wonder how they got that way!!! I get the impression that these girls are pretty understimulated, and possibly use weed and alcohol to help cope with feelings of emptiness and unfulfillment.

Basically all the night photography I looked at of Santa Monica had the sky as this deep purple, but I was kind of skeptical because it looked photoshopped. But I was driving home from work the other day (I live in a similar oceanside climate, for reference), and sure enough!!! The sky does indeed turn a sort of a hazy purplish-gray at night in dense urban areas with a lot of light pollution, so I wasn't bullshitting y'all!!!

Genuinely can't decide if for the finished fic I want to write the entire "Demetri hitting on Yasmine" scene from Yas's point of view, or just cut it off at "oh, for FUCK'S sake" XD Like idk which would be funnier (and more lesbian): Yasmine steadily growing more and more horrified as this idiot gay guy tries to shoot his shot, or immediately cutting to the next scene because Yas thinks the whole bit isn't even worth mentioning.

Very, very excited to finish writing Yasmine's POV of the beach party, and then dive into Moon's POV for the All Too Well fic. Like this is the biggest misunderstanding of the century and I'm going to milk the fuck out of the tragic irony of it all. It's like the perfect mixture of Moon diving into some good old-fashioned loophole abuse (i.e. "it's not cheating if you keep insisting we're not dating!") and genuinely believing that since Yasmine said their fling meant nothing to her, Yas wouldn't mind if Moon explored her options. Meanwhile Yasmine was counting on Moon picking up on like 5 layers of hidden meanings. You know. Like a moron. Also, all of the hidden meanings were "I love you but I can't spit it out for shit and now I'm mad that you don't magically know without me having to say it." Useless lesbians <3

#cksapphicsummer #yasmoon #yasmine x moon #moon x yasmine #moodboard #aesthetic #yasmine cobra kai #moon cobra kai #eli moskowitz #hawk #fanfic #fanfiction #cobra kai #cobra kai season 1 #cobra kai season 2 #cobra kai season 3 #femslash #wlw #lesbian #sapphic

[trashboatprince]

As is tradition since I think I started this account in 2012, I tend to do a post about all the more interesting things that happened in the year and what I hope happens in the next so...

Yeah.

Here we go.

Met David Tennant and got not only my photo taken with him and his signature, but I also got three hugs from him. He is a very lovely man, and gosh is he pretty in person. <3

Met Rhys Darby in person and made him burst out laughing when I told him I recognized him as the freaking Pistachio King from Milo Murphy's Law. He wasn't expecting that role of all things.

Last day of my trip for the con I discovered a lump on my chest that really hurt and for two and a half months I was stuck in a constant state of anxiety because they thought it was inflammatory breast cancer. Turns out it was just a really bad infection that had very similar symptoms.

Lost our oldest dog in October :(

My mom did get a pug puppy a few months beforehand tho, as she had been wanting a pug for years

Had probably one of the most absolutely obnoxious family reunions this year, but was able to go up into the mountains and had a lovely time in nature. And I got to pick huckleberries, which I've never done before. That was nice.

Went to Colorado and sat the Monsters of Metal tour's last show there, with Mastodon (third time seeing them) and Gojira (first time seeing them)

Had a fucking experience listening to The Chant live at that showing and it was just... impossible to describe. It was beautiful.

Went to the Devil's Tower on the way to Colorado, it was pretty dang cool. Lots of alien shit everywhere, the area really loves to play up on that. Also went to the Denver Zoo and Meow Wolf, both of which were delightful. :D

Went to my little brother's high school graduation, cannot believe he's out of high school.

Experienced season two of Good Omens and am still recovering.

I was there when EVERY happened, in just ten minutes it was known and then quickly NO LONGER SPOKEN ABOUT. That was a fun hour of panic from the fandom. :)

Watched OFMD season 2 and... eh.

Watched all four of the new Doctor Who specials when they dropped and now Fourteen and Fifteen are my favorite Doctors. I love them.

Had probably some of the most stressful months I've ever had with my job because we were down to just three people for a staff that is meant to run a home that is 24/7. I'm still dealing with the stress from it even after we got more people hired. My paychecks were beautiful tho, so much overtime...

Apparently I got a stress fracture on Thanksgiving, happened in my sleep. I should be out of the boot officially next week.

Participated in a David Tennant-themed zine

Absolutely dumb thing to add, but my mom got me a DT cutout who now lives in my room. He's wearing a paper crown from a Christmas cracker because he's a king Plans for the next year:

Going to see Hozier in August

Probably going to go back to Colorado, I want to see the aquarium

Going to ECCC for the third year in a row, going to get Jodie Whitaker's autograph

Hopefully I'll get to see my girlfriend again

Hopefully I'll get to finally see my best friends irl (We need to plan this better, guys!)

See if I can finally get my second tattoo

#john's commentary

[stranger-nightmare]

have you talked about your experience meeting Jamie before??? im pretty new to your blog so maybe you did, but when you talked about hugging him so casually i was like WHAT

I’ve mentioned a few times that I got to meet him but I’ve never told the full story I guess! if anyone is interested I’ll give a lil run down of it, and add some pictures, below <33

so I’ve been a fan of Jamie’s and have followed both his music and acting career for nearly a decade, I was a fan of him back when he was doing music under the name The Darling Buds before eventually Counterfeit was formed!

I’d been wanting to see them live for so so so long but unfortunately bc they were reasonably unknown they did a lot of gigs at bars and stuff and unfortunately at the time I wasn’t 18 so I couldn’t go, then i was supposed to see Counterfeit live at a proper venue but my friend cancelled on me at the last minute so I couldn’t go again, long story short I’d been trying and trying to see him live for years but shit just got in the way and things never seemed to go according to plan unfortunately

so in 2019 his band Counterfeit went on tour and I was finally able to go, and after loving him for so long and waiting for so long I upgraded to the vip package so I could meet the band (mostly just Jamie ngl but also yes the rest of the band too)

so the vip package included a question and answer session with the band beforehand, then a meet and greet / photo, and then also early entry into the venue

so we sat down to have the meet and greet and I ended up being sat right at the front just off to one side (I’ll see if I can find the pictures and attach them below) and first things first let me just say that yes Jamie absolutely is that pretty in real life, it’s staggering honestly

so people asked questions and the band answered obviously and Jamie is just so fucking sweet and so charismatic and you can tell he genuinely cares and puts effort into listening and answering each person

after shitting myself for ages I eventually plucked up the courage to ask him a question myself! they’d been discussing bands that had been inspiration and lifelines for them throughout their lives so I asked them how it felt to be that kind of band for us and Jamie was flabbergasted but like in the best way possible, he was so funny like ‘yikes that’s a lot of pressure and I probably shouldn’t be the one people look up to bc I’m only human and I make mistakes’ basically that kind of vibe just joking around but then he also got serious and said that’s it’s a genuine honour and he feels so blessed that he can be that for us, and then he really sincerely thanked me for my question

okay so after the q&a we got to line up to meet the band one by one and have our photos taken

so yeah when it was my turn I said hello to them all and have them all a hug individually and this is when I get to tell you THAT JAMIE GIVES THE BEST HUGS EVER AND ALSO HE SMELLS FUCKING INCREDIBLE (something which my friend told him straight to his face and he just blushed and giggled it was adorable) anyways like yeah the rest of the band just gave kinda awkward half assed hugs but Jamie and Roland fully went for it and I love that for them, and for me tbh lmao

then I asked if I could ask a favour from Jamie and he went ‘of course you can darling’ to which I nearly passed out but yeah I asked if could write out the title to my favourite song of theirs which is titled ‘Enough’ so I could go and have it tattooed in his handwriting, and he was so thrilled about it and was like yes absolutely!! Roland got involved and asked where I was gonna get it done and was just generally having a conversation with me and Jamie whilst the rest of the band just stood there haha! also Jamie thanked me for my question again and said he really appreciated how deep it was and how it made him think asdfghjkll

so anyways yeah he wrote it for me and he was about about to give it back when he went ‘oh wait’ and then he added a lil kiss to the end of it too which I just thought was super sweet

yeah then we took our pictures together and I thanked him and the rest of the band before saying my goodbyes

then we had a bit of time to spare before the actual gig so, seeing as we were in central London, I just went and had it tattooed immediately at a shop literally five minutes down from the venue

I posted my tattoo on my insta story and Jamie and the band’s account saw it and reposted it to their stories so I knew he had seen it

anyways then cut to the actual gig and I’m front row and when they play ‘Enough’ Jamie comes straight over to me and literally sings the majority of the song directly at me and gives me like a lil nod of acknowledgment, I think I’m honour of the tattoo, and when I tell you that my soul damn near ascended when he serenaded me like that asdfghjkl I don’t know how I stayed up right tbh

hands down one of the best gigs I’ve ever been too and Jamie is genuinely genuinely one of the most precious and loving and sweet people you could ever hope to meet, I only got to see him and his band once before the broke up but I feel so incredibly lucky to just have had that one night and one moment with him, he truly is a sweetheart and I will continue to love and support him for another decade! I’m so glad he’s finally getting the recognition he desires bc he’s so so so so incredibly talented and he deserves the absolute world <33

so yeah that’s my story of when I met Jamie!! I’ll attach some pictures below if anyone’s interested! hehe lil face reveal here of me and Jamie lmao

if you know me irl, no you don’t

#the answer to your nightmare #jamie bower #jamie campbell bower #stranger things #stranger things cast #hey it’s hope

[spaghettificationandpretzels]

The Reaper and The Death Angel Part 36

Series Masterlist

Part 35

Contains: Fluff, angst, loosely follows the plot of episode 2x08 - 3x10

6.7K words

Comment if you want to be tagged or follow #the reaper and the death angel.

To Ireland we go.

"We're here safe."

You breathed a sigh of relief, "Jax just texted, they've landed and are in Belfast without any trouble."

Ima put her hand over her heart, "thank God, I'll check my phone, Sam would have texted." Sure enough, there was a short text from Sam.

"How's your tattoo healing?"

She flashed you her arm, "sore but nothing I haven't been through before, Sam still keeps asking to see it."

You laughed, "Jax was the same, it was like trying to keep a little kid away from his birthday presents."

She giggled, "I'm kinda glad he's not here, I got sick of telling him that he couldn't look at it."

You shook your head, "you wanna come with me to get Kip out of the hospital? They're only keeping him there for the insurance."

She nodded and grabbed her keys, "I'll drive." She put the local radio station on for the ride. As you were about to comment on one of the stories, another came on.

"This just in, Jacob Hale has launched his bid for mayor against the town favourite Elliot Oswald."

Ima blinked in shock, "did I just hear that right?" You turned the radio up and waited for the presenter to continue, "he's running on the basis of small business first and is looking to bring Charming into the luxury housing market."

"You did. I don't know if he knows this but the whole town hates him."

She turned into St Thomas' parking lot, "his rich developer friends don't."

"Hey Kip, we're breaking you out of here."

He smiled, "thank God, this place is driving me insane." You helped him up while Ima went to get some help and an hour later you were driving him back to T-M after dropping Kip home.

****

"So who's been left behind?"

You had dropped Ima at work on the way so it was just you, "Tig, Piney and Kozik, all the others are in Belfast."

He nodded, "do you know if they've found Jimmy yet?"

You shook your head, "all Jax told me was that they were there safe, I don't know anything after that. He said he called once they were settled. I need to go get my stitches out but I'll be back afterwards and we'll talk more then."

You were just getting done with the doctor when Jax called, "hey Darlin."

Something was wrong, "You can't hide shit from me Teller, what happened?"

Jax laughed, "we almost got sent back home by a group of dirty cops."

"Jimmy?"

He made an affirmative grunt, "can I ask you a question?"

His tone was unsure, there was more than just one thing wrong, "sure my love, is something on your mind?"

You heard him inhale, "could you tell if I was related to someone by just a photo?"

You blinked, "if they were a very close relative maybe, but do Sam and I look like siblings?"

There was an exhale, "not even a little, can I send you those photos anyway?"

"Well you keep telling me so it must be true." The photos came through soon after, with a short text from Jax.

"Sure beloved, get a few from different angles and maybe give me some more context than just that you think you've got a cousin you didn't know about."

He laughed, "done. You're great, did you know that?"

"Her name is Trinity, she looks like dad and she's twenty-two, with the way her mother Maureen and Gemma were talking, I think something's up. He was over there a lot when Maureen would have been pregnant."

You looked over the photos, there was no doubt in your mind that this woman was Jax's half-sister. Of course you called him, "hey." He knew by your tone what you were going to say, "I'm really sorry beloved."

"Are you sure?"

He sounded very upset, "sure enough to tell you to start digging." There was a laboured breath across the line, "you know you're mum, she would know if John was stepping out on her. Start there, then ask Maureen. I think talking to Trinity outright might not get you anywhere because they would have kept this whole thing under wraps."

You could hear him moving around like an anxious animal, "what do I do?"

You took a deep breath, "I know this must feel like a terrible betrayal from your father but if it's true, you've gained a little sister. It's no comfort but there might be a whole another person who's in your corner and that's a good thing."

"I love you too."

There was a soft chuckle, "you always know what to say."

Before you could reply, you heard someone yell his name, "got to go Darlin, I love you."

Jax walked out of the bedroom to the table full, "sit down son, we've got a lot to talk about."

Jax sat at the table, full of the Belfast charter, "Jimmy'o is in the wind, the Irish kings are ready to give the green light but we need to find him first."

Jax shook his head, "why do we have to deal with this? How can we even trust you, O'Neil was on the phone with him telling us lies."

The room was getting icier, "I had no idea that Cammy was here, that lie is on Jimmy."

Jax sucked on his tongue, "sure. No one answered my question, why does this fall on us?"

McGee seemed annoyed, "we're too close to this, Belfast is still a war zone. If we kill Jimmy, our whole chapter will be dead within the month."

Jax threw his hands up in the air, "so what, we find him, question him then do him?"

McGee gave an affirmative grunt, "that's the plan." The table went from there, talking about their operation and then the priest was brought up Kellan Ashby.

If the room was icy before, it was like the arctic right now. "That won't be necessary Sam, we'll talk to this priest and go from there." Clay took in Sam's cold expression, he had no doubt in his mind Sam was telling the truth.

"He'll know more, the kings take his word as gospel."

Sam had sat there silent the whole time, when he spoke, his voice was short, bordering on frightening. "So Jimmy tries to steal the guns out of under this charter, he's on the run and you want us to talk with a priest. Why aren't the kings who missed his bullshit here talking to us? It's their problem. Hell, you say the word and I'll have my guys do him in and we won't have to get our hands dirty."

****

The yelling got worse, "will you two shut the fuck up and get back to work. For shit's sake guys, some of us are trying to pick up the slack, it would be good if you could help out." Tig walked back into the garage shaking his head and Kozik was too scared to meet your eye.

"What the fuck is wrong with the two of them?"

Chucky shrugged, "judging by the level of animosity, there's got to be at least on vagina involved."

You chuckled, "very shrewd Chucky, very shrewd."

"Thank you."

You turned to Chucky, "I'll check the dorm to see if the receivables are there, we're in for a long day Chuck." You were walking out of the Clubhouse when Lyla drove up.

"Hello, what brings you by?"

She smiled softly, "I thought we could all put on dinner while the guys are away, just us girls and the kids?"

You nodded, "great idea, my place?"

You both sat on the picnic bench, "yep. Can I ask you a question?"

"Sure."

She seemed worried, "what going to happen when they guys go inside?"

You shrugged, "I have no idea, Opie will be here so you won't be alone but I think it's all going to pan out in the end. What's got you so worried?"

"Opie been talking about kids and getting married."

You nodded, "and you don't want another kid with a man who could get his brains blown out and leave you with four children to look after on your own?"

"Thanks. I guess we've got a dinner to plan." You nodded and was gone.

She breathed out a breath she didn't know she was holding, "yep."

You put a hand on hers, "talk to him, say just that and if he doesn't understand that then he's not the person for you. He's a good man Lyla, he's just got a lot of shit he needs to work through. All you can do is be honest with him."

You were about to head to the store when Darby showed up, "what the fuck do you want?"

He raised his hands, "I just want to talk."

Upon seeing him, Tig and Kozik walk up, "about?"

You jutted your hand out, "no Tig. I don't give a shit what he want. I want myself a Nazi scalp to hang on my wall, you want it to be yours?"

Darby swallowed, "it's about Jacob Hale."

You huffed, "fine, but if it involves you, I imagine it's criminal, we should get Unser or his brother here." To your surprise, there was no dissent.

Hale was there far quicker than you thought he'd be, "what did my brother do this time?"

You rubbed your face, "I don't know, ask the Nazi scum currently wasting my air."

Hale smiled gently, "please y/n can you cool it for just a little while and hear him out."

You threw your hands up in the air, "he has five minutes and if he's wasted my time, I'll shoot one of his knee caps off."

Tig hid a laugh, "done." You all sat down. Darby's eyes never left your hands, he was clearly terrified of you.

"Your brother just handed me an envelope of cash and asked him to get rid of Lumpy so he could buy the building."

You shook your head, "well I just won a bet." Tig looked confused, "I bet Jax that Hale would try something else and I was right. We can't do anything until we know the full story. What exactly did he say to you?"

"That his investor friends needs the lot and Lumpy was the last one holding out, he wanted me to get rid of him."

David was getting angrier and angrier, "did he say the cash was for getting rid of Lumpy?"

He shook his head, "no, he said it was a small business loan."

"Ok, no one is going to do anything." You pointed to Hale, "we can't do anything until we know all the facts, no one's going to say anything and Mr Darby is going to act like he's going to go along with it. You're going to warn Lumpy and then you're going to press Hale for more information and we'll go from there. If we want to get anywhere, we need dirt on this investor as well."

The table was quiet, "fine, but don't expect him to tell me anything."

You were getting sick of his voice, "I don't know why you're here, whether the fire that burnt you got you a little too close to hell and you want to make amends but I don't care, you'll get that information if you have to lie and cheat to get it."

He took a deep breath, "I know why you hate me, you have every right to but I'm trying to change, I'm trying to do the right thing."

You shook your head, "you are incapable of doing the right thing. Is there a reason you've had a come of Jesus moment or is this just a rat jumping off a sinking ship?"

Another deep breath, "when I was in the hospital one of my workers came to see me every day. She had no reason to, considering she knew what I was but she still showed up."

He went to continue but you cut him off, "so you love her like a monster loves a songbird, not for what she is but for what she did for you and you think that makes you worthy of redemption. Come back when you've actually done something."

****

Hale's eyebrows went up, "call me when you have more information."

He and Darby left, leaving you to continue planning with Tig and Kozik, "that was really scary."

You patted him on the shoulder, "thanks Herman."

"Jimmy doesn't tell me anything anymore, I have no idea why he lied."

Chibs was had his hand on Fiona's back, while the other listened to her. "Do you at least know what he's been up to since he got back?"

They were being rushed off soon after but with some pushing from the guys, they managed to get a ride with Chibs' family back to the church.

She huffed, "recruiting, he's at his bar pretty much every day and night."

Jax nodded, "what about O'Neil, is he on Jimmy's payroll?"

She shook her head, "not that I know of."

****

"Hey y/n."

You walked into the office, "yeah."

Tig smiled and put the phone down, "that was Darby, Lumpy knows Hale's gunning for him, he's closing up for a few days just to be safe.

****

You nodded, "ha, he came through. I'm still waiting on word from my guy about Hale's friends." You took a deep breath, "this guy can't become mayor Tiggy, he will ruin this town before his term is over and we will never recover."

He nodded, "I know, we'll fix it."

"All the way down here, I was holding onto hope that you were wrong about Trinity but one look."

Maureen nodded, "she's got his eyes and his smile."

Gemma looked down at the table, "did he know?"

She nodded, "yes."

"Jesus Christ."

Maureen crossed her arms, "I was eighteen, I didn't know what I was doing, neither did he. Look I have no delusion about you me and being friends. I just think a lot of hate right now is no good for anybody. This shit between us, it needs to stay buried."

"Too late."

Jax rounded the corner, his posture stiff, "how long have you been standing there?"

He shrugged, "long enough."

There was a cold chill to the air, "I can explain."

He waved his hand, "don't mum. Does Trinity know?"

Maureen shook her head, "no, she doesn't. She thinks her father died in Lebanon."

Jax huffed, "who else knows?"

Maureen got stiff, "just my brother, he won't tell a soul."

He shook his head, "tell her by the time we leave or I will." Jax walked away in a rage, leaving Gemma and Maureen to deal with the fallout.

Jax felt angry more than lost, his mother knew his father was cheating on him and kept it a secret. He was a little hurt, Gemma told him everything, he couldn't understand why she kept something so huge from him.

"He reminds me of John."

Gemma huffed, "I know."

"Hey darlin."

Jax knew you would know what to say, "hey my love, I'm guessing by the way you sound you know for sure?"

He took a deep breath, "yeah, mum knew and she never said anything. I've told them if they don't tell Trinity by the time we leave, I'll tell her. I know it's not my place but she should know the truth."

"You are very noble Jackson, it's admirable."

His breath stuttered, "so you think I did the right thing?"

His voice was cracking, "yes Jax, I do. I still can't imagine how hard this must be for you, finding out your dad wasn't the person you thought you knew."

"Why didn't Gemma tell me? She kept my sister from me."

You could hear he was on the verge of tears, "when you were little, who was your hero?"

You knew the answer, "my dad."

Jax smiled, "she didn't want that to change Jax, she wanted you to remember your father as the man you thought he was not who she knew him as. You have every right to be angry but she was trying to spare you more pain."

"I would be lost without you."

You chuckled, "nah, you'd be fine."

You could almost hear him shaking his head, "nope, I'd be lost and so would everyone else. How are things over there?"

"I won our bet. Hale is trying to get Lumpy to give up his gym so he can buy the space."

Jax huffed, "what are your winnings going to be?"

You smiled, "well since you never got to attend one of my practical lectures, I'd like to tie you up. With your consent of course."

He chuckled, "whatever you want Darlin."

"Oh, he's great. His face has started to develop but his back teeth have only just started to come in so he looks like an old man without his dentures in and it makes me want to squish his little face. He's also taken to putting everything in his mouth and he's too young to understand what's food and what isn't so I have to watch him like a halk."

"Yay, I'm going to have so much…." You trailed off, "what is it?"

There was an unhappy noise coming from you, "Kip just walked into T-M after I told him to stay home and rest, I'm going to kill him."

Jax knew that tone, Half Sack was in for a mum lecture, "before you kill the guy, how's Abel?"

Jax was smiling ear to ear, "he also likes it when the dogs' tails hit him, which is really weird but I can't be bothered to step in because of his little baby giggle. He's a weird baby."

Jax laughed, "that's your fault for talking to him about science hippy stuff and not trucks and Harleys."

You giggled, "hey, I talk to him about bikes, so does Sam, he's just more interested in the history of sales tax. Don't think I don't know what you're doing, you're trying to make me all happy before I talk to kip so I don't kill him."

"Well I value your assessment. I'll let you go yell at Half Sack now. I love you Darlin."

Jax laughed, "you don't miss a thing, what do you think about the new prospects?"

There was a pause, "Phill is great, Miles is enthusiastic and friendly but Shepard won't last a month, he's a bit too flightly and he's got his head in the cloud and not in a good way."

****

"Love you too Jax." You put the phone down, stood up and walked over to the picnic tables. "What are you doing here young man?"

His eyes went wide, "I thought I told you to go home and rest." He looked over at the guys, "send him home now or I'll do it. I have shit to do, call me if anything comes up." You left soon after to start prep for the dinner you and the other women were putting on.

"How long are you gonna stay with the priest?"

Fionna huffed, "not sure."

Chibs was anxious, "listen, there's plenty of room on Russo's plane so you're coming back with us."

'I don't want to leave Ireland."

Chibs shook his head, "sweetheart, it's not for long, just until all this blows over."

The tires screeched as the van came to a stop, "what's he doing?"

"GET DOWN!" Sam threw himself on top of one of the girls, Jax diving down seconds after him as bullets hit the car. It didn't last long, maybe thirty seconds before the car drove off, "what the fuck was that, is everyone ok?"

They looked around, "yeah I think so."

An hour later, they were all at the table, "are the girls safe?"

Chibs nodded, "yeah, they're fine."

The mistrust between SAMBEL and SAMCRO was growing, "do you have any idea who the shooters are?"

Opie sounded like he had his suspicions, "it had to be Jimmy."

"No, it was the UVF. They're radical loyalists, this would have been about Fionna."

Jax shook his head, "so they gunned down women and children?"

O'Neil shook his head, "if they wanted to kill you, you'd be dead. Trust me on that, brother." No one believed the bullshit for a second but there was no way they could talk about that here, it seemed more and more that the whole charter was on Jimmy's payroll.

They parted soon after, with the SAMCRO guys back to the inn while the others went back to the Clubhouse. The conversation went around in circles about the plan, they had to get Jimmy back to the States without creating more problems but with how deep SAMBEL was it was looking less and less possible.

Sam nodded, "you are trust me. I don't know how much she's told you about our home life, but if we had a half-sibling around, we'd want to have a relationship with them. We're pretty sure we do but our father isn't going to tell us unless he needs something from us." Jax swallowed, you barely told him anything.

Sam had pulled Jax aside just as Clay went off about Mcgee, "you wanna tell me what's going on with your half-sister?" Jax's eyes went wide, "y/n didn't say anything, you don't think I've picked up some of her skills over the years?"

Jax smiled softly, "I have no idea what to do, your sister says I'm doing the right thing in forcing them to come clean."

"I'm really sorry you two went through that."

Sam shrugged, "ehh, it's ok. We don't have contact with the man and as far as my sister's concerned, he's dead, I'm sure you'll get to meet him one day when he needs someone to bail him out, or give him a chunk of liver."

****

Jax huffed, "he better hope not."

Sam put a hand on his shoulder, "come on, we could use your input on the plan for the gun run."

"This better be good Tiggy, Abel's just discovered to joy of jello and I don't want to miss the mess he's going to make."

Tig laughed, "Darby's back, he got more info from Hale." Tig sounded optimistic, "Hale's buddy works for a company out of LA that builds huge developments, we're talking whole suburbs. He wants those shops to make a new mall."

"Ok great, I'll pass the guy's name onto my guy and we'll go from there. Did Darby say if Hale bought it?"

Tig huffed, "hook, line and sinker, he has no idea we're working an angle."

You breathed a sigh of relief, "we're on the right track. Gives the guys a few days to settle in when they get home then we'll download them. I'll call the moment my guy gets back to me."

"Was that Tig?"

You nodded, "yeah, things are moving along with Hale. You good with finishing the cheesecake from tomorrow?"

Ima nodded, "yeah, Luanne said she'll be here at four to help out and Lyla's bringing the kids."

"Alright, I imagine Sam and Jax will be calling soon, I'll feed Abel while you have a shower, then I'll get dinner on. I'm going back to work tomorrow but I'll be home early."

She leaned on the benchtop, "is this ever going to slow down?"

You shrugged "yeah, eventuallty. They guys will be home in a few days, then we have a month or two before they have to go inside. Things will ease up."

****

She looked upset, "you doing ok?"

She shook her head, "I miss your brother."

You nodded "I know, I miss him too. They'll be ok."

Jax was bored out of his brains, usually at this time he would be sitting down for dinner you Sam, Ima, Abel and you, talking about how everyone's day went. But he was sitting at the picnic tables in the SAMBEL compound staring at the night sky with nothing to do but wait until the run tomorrow. He had a quick conversation with you and Abel a little while ago but it was too early in the morning to call you now.

"Hey man."

Sam and Opie sat down next to him, "you look deep in thought."

Jax shrugged, "there's nothing to do here but wait, it's killing me."

Sam huffed, "been there down that, I've lost count of how much time I've spent waiting around with my dick in my hand while the brass holds meetings. We could play cards, or lift weights, or eat, eating's good."

Opie chuckled, "you don't really need to lift anymore weights Sam."

Jax's chest got warm, "that's really sweet." It was tinged with sadness, he loved both of you, Sam treated him like a brother but sometimes seeing you two together made him long for Thomas.

"You can never be too strong, I can do a two-fingered pushup, can you?"

Jax shook his head, "your sister's humility hasn't rubbed off on you."

Sam huffed, "she's the reason I started lifting. When we were teenagers, she worked two minimum wage jobs and was doing three PhDs so she was always tired. We lived in a one bedroom apartment and she would sleep on the couch so I would have the bed. She used to fall asleep all over the place so I started lifting so I could carry her to bed."

"I mean it when I say this but what's mine is yours. We can share Sam, no charge."

Jax knew without a doubt he was going to marry you, there were days when it was the only thing that kept him going. He knew he was going to get the Club out of guns and he knew you would stick by to help, he just hoped with all his heart that you didn't come to your senses and leave him before then.

"I beat, I'm heading to bed." Opie left leaving Sam and Jax alone

"I know I'm not as smart as my sister but I'm pretty close and I know you well, you want to let me know why you're so lost in your head?"

Jax was too overwhelmed to contemplate what that meant.

Jax shrugged, "I waiting for the day your sister sees the light and leaves me."

Sam shook his head, "she loves you Jax and she's going to be with you through thick and thin. She wouldn't have done all the stuff she has if she had any doubts. My biggest worry is that the more you know about her the more you're going to be the one to run."

****

"This is going to sound weird, but do you have a bad feeling?"

You looked at Ima like she had three heads, "I woke up feeling like someone was sitting on my chest. I'm putting it down to stress and worry and not that horrible six sense that some people get before shit hits the fan."

She nodded, "we have the dinner tonight, we can focus on that."

"Yeah, I guess. When will you be home?"

You shrugged, "about two, it's a light day today but I'll be back to full duty tomorrow."

You left for work soon after and arrived to the whole lab busy, "what do we have?"

"Great, I'll start with the worst bodies and go from there."

"Building fire in Oakland, we've got six bodies on the deck."

You threw your hands up, "since when did we start getting fire IDs?"

Holt rubbed his face, "since last month, I've managed to hold them off but this looks like arson so we're stuck."

Two pm arrived before you knew it, only half the bodies were identified before you left, "I'll be back early tomorrow morning, call me if something comes up, please."

Holt nodded, "will do, get home safe."

Ima was already cooking when you got home, "Lyla will be here soon, I sent her out to get more milk and Luanne is going to be on time, the thing with CaraCara sorted itself out."

You nodded, "great, I think I might stop by and see Otto, I've got a whole lot of stuff to give him. I won't be long, I should be home by five."

****

"Good idea, I'm sure he'll be happy to see a friendly face. And Luanne will be grateful that you're still going to see him. Why don't you take Abel?"

You nodded, "great idea."

"Hey sweetie, how have you been?" Otto smiled, "you know, alone for the last two months."

You huffed and covered Abel's ears, "you did stick a bit of sharped bedpost in a Nazi's ear. He deserved it but murder is wrong and all."

He chuckled, "he's grown."

Abel was babbling and reaching his fat little hands out, "I know, you wanna hold him?"

Otto's arms went towards you before you could finish your sentence, "is he old enough to be eating solid food?"

You nodded, "yes, his favourite is his carrot and roast beef for dinner and strawberry yogurt for dessert."

Otto smiled, "you know, Luanne and I never wanted kids, but sometimes I think it would have been nice."

"You would have made good parents."

His eyes fell to the table, "I'm here for life now, I've had a lot of time to think." His gaze moved to the basket of food, "what have you brought me today?"

"Well get used to it, I'll be coming for as long as you want me."

"Lots of food, and books on tape. I bought The Wild West, how wine, women and song build America. The Truth About Modern Medicine and Ancient Food, Delicious or Deady."

His mouth was full of food, "thank you for everything, I think without your visits, I would have gone crazy long ago."

Jax called you just as you were leaving the prison, "hey Darlin."

He sounded tired, "hello my love, how are you?"

You could hear people talking and moving in the background, "good, we're getting closer to finding Jimmy. How are things there?"

"Good, we're having dinner with all the women tonight, I mean the kid will be there but other than that, it's just us girls."

Jax laughed, "are you meaning to tell me your forming a coven."

You giggled, "yep, watch out Mr Teller, one wrong step and I'll make sure all your hair falls out."

"Oh I'm terrified, how was work?"

Jax knew that groan, "how do you think, we're now helping with Arson investigations." The noise on the background was growing, "is everything ok over there?"

There was a pause while Jax spoke to someone else, "everything's in fine, some priest said that this is all about Jimmy wanting to take our business and sell it to the Russians but we still can't find the guy. The guys are just loading the guns now from the protection run we're helping with.

BANG

"Shit, do you want me to get some of my guys on it?"

You could hear the smile in Jax's voice, "nah Darlin, you've got to let me be a least a little usefu….."

The line went dead, you tried calling back, more than once but there was nothing. All you could do was drive home and go about your day, you'd let the other women know after dinner what had happened, they deserved some peace.

****

'What's wrong?"

You shook your head, "nothing, it's just been a long day. Is the bread ready for the oven?"

Lyla nodded, "yeah, go for it." You did your best to keep it together as the women arrived and put dinner on. You forced yourself to eat through nausea and worry, hoping desperately that Jax or Sam would call soon.

"When I was on the phone to Jax today the last thing I heard was what I think was a bomb go off, the line went dead and Jax hasn't gotten back to me." Someone swallowed, "there was no point in bringing it up, what can we do from here. You're all more than welcome to stay here until someone calls."

"Have you heard from Jax today?"

You nodded, "yeah, he seemed pretty busy. They're no closer to fixing what they're over there to fix."

Ima seemed worried, "really because I'm sure there's something you're not telling us, you keep going to get your phone out." you looked around at the women, there's was no point in keeping it from them now that dinner was over.

Everyone waited anxiously, the conversation would go from mundane nothing to fear filled speculation over and over again, then Ima got a call, "it's Sam." She answered the phone and put it down on the table on speaker, "y/n said she heard an explosion when she was talking to Jax, is everyone ok?"

"What? We're all fine, I'm sure Jax thought he hung up before it happened, none of our guys are hurt more than a few scrapes and bruises. How are things there?"

The conservation was short, Sam didn't have much to tell everyone before he asked if he could talk to Ima in private. Soon enough, you think because Sam told Jax, he was calling you. "I'm so sorry Darlin, I thought I hung up before it went off."

"It's fine Jax, I was so worried about you. Sam said everyone was ok."

He sounded even more tired than this afternoon, "yeah, we're all doing ok. But we know for sure that SAMBEL's been comprised, we're looking for O'Neil now. We think he's the one who set it off."

"Shit Jax, is Mcgee involved?"

Jax sighed, "we think so but we can't know for sure until we find O'Neil."

You shook your head, "that's not good Jax, he's first nine. If he's in bed with Jimmy you'll never get to him."

Jax huffed, "I know, that's part of the reason I'm calling. We think he's going to use the Russian Mafia to get him out of Ireland, do you think you can get us some info on the players in Northern Cali?"

"I'll call Penelope now. Please be careful Jackson, I don't know what I'd do if anything happened to you."

Jax chuckled, "nothing's going to happen to me. I'll be home before you know it. How did dinner go?"

You smiled, "good, until everyone found out you got yourself blown up. I saw Otto today, I took Abel with me and everything. He seems to be settling into his new reality ok but I promised I go back and see him as often as I could."

****

"You're a saint. I've got to go but I'll try and call again before you fall asleep."

You breathed a sigh of relief, "I'm just glad you're ok. Happy hunting."

Mcgee burst into the room, "because my boys are loyal to the MC. You're right about O'Neil, the Irish became more important than the patch." It went back and forth for a while, the voices becoming more and more raised. They finally got the location of a warehouse then left in a rush of leather and gasoline.

"O'Niel's an officer, if we point the finger at him, we might as well condemn the whole charter."

Clay shook his head, "maybe it's time we start looking at that. How do we know Jimmy didn't turn others?"

They searched in groups until they found him riding his bike away from the scene, Jax didn't hesitate in clotheslining him off it. "Call Sean Casey, we've got a confession to record." They dragged him inside the building with Mcgee following close behind.

"Who ordered the hit?" The confession didn't take long, it being Jimmy wasn't a surprise to anyone but the fact that he confirmed Mcgee was dirty was a surprise. His guys raced after him while Jax offed O'Neil, before they could do any more, Jimmy's men, or boys as it were, turned up.

They strung him up on what looked like a meat hook while Casey readied his tools. "I need you to tell me who ordered you to blow up that truck, Liam?"

O'Neil sounded scared, "I didn't blow it up." They cringed as Casey sliced his skin, O'Neil's screams turning blood-curdling.

They ran up the ladder to the roof before setting the room alight, the fire spreading as Jimmy reached to roof. As if it couldn't get any worse, they got into a shoot out with Jimmy's crew while Mcgee ran in the other direction and in the confusion and the gunfire, Jimmy managed to get away.

Mcgee on the other hand, wasn't so lucky, they caught him on the roof trying to scale a ladder down to get away. The conversation between him and Clay was short, then Clay was removing his kutte and throwing him off the edge.

They went right to the Irish kings who were thankful but when it came to taking him out, they buttoned up. By the time they had left, Ryan was the new president and they were no closer to finding Jimmy.

When Jax walked toward his room, Trinity was sitting on the bed waiting for him. Her face was puffy and her eyes were red, she had been crying. "I'm sorry about Mcgee."

She shook her head, "thanks, ma told me about your da, our da, I guess."

Jax's heart jumped, "I'm sorry. I had no idea…"

Trinity was falling asleep against his shoulder by the time they were done talking, it must have been close to four in the morning when he sent her to bed. Even though Jax was exhausted, he called you just because he wanted to hear your voice.

She cut him off, "it's ok, you did the right thing forcing ma to tell me. I don't know where we got from here Jackson?"

He smiled softly, "well, what are you doing at college? I'd like to hear about that, hell, we can talk about whatever you want."

"Hey Darlin."

He could hear Holt in the background, "hello my love, it's very early over there, shouldn't you be in bed?"

Jax chuckled, "nah, I just got done talking with my sister."

He could almost hear your smile, "I'm really happy for you Jax, I told you it would all pan out in the end."

"Yeah, you did. She's a really nice girl, we're gonna try and stay in touch. How's work?"

You huffed, "I'm in the weeds right now and I'm never taking any time off again. It looks like one of us is going to have to be a forensic consultant for arson cases. Oswald smartly said one of the first things he's going to do as mayor is explained our fire department. I looked at the proposal, it's a good decision."

"You're not going to leave me for a firefighter are you?"

You giggled, "have you ever been inside a firehouse? Those places and dens of iniquity and sin. You any closer to Jimmy?"

Jax let out a grunt, "no, Mcgee and O'Neil were dirty, they're both dead."

He could hear more people in the background, "Belfast sounds like it's on its last legs, that really sucks."

"I'm just ready to get out of here."

An alarm went off in the background, "I get that, and as much as I'd love to talk until the wee small hours, a machine is yelling at me. I love you Jax."

"Love you too y/n."

You raced out of your office, "what do we have?" Jack shook his head "it was a professional job, this wasn't some accidental drug fire. Someone lit the place up and wanted it to burn."

You look over the papers, "I need to make some calls, this might have something to do with all of us."

You ran into your office and called Penelope, "hey, Garcia, Hale's developer, has he been connected to any building fires? Not just properties he owns but ones he was looking into buying?"

Her keys clacked, "yes, actually, four. Only ten deaths were reported including the fire you're working on but at least twenty people were injuired. I'll do some more digging and get back to you."

"Thanks, can you have all the paperwork faxed to Holt right now, he needs to see this."

More clacking, "done, talk soon."

"Oh Kozik, you're gonna want to hear what I just found out."

"Yeah, talk soon."

You called T-M right away, "Teller-Morrow, this is Herman, how can I help you."

Part 37

#the reaper and the death angel #Jax teller #sons of anarchy #sons of anarchy imagine #fluff #soa #jax teller #sons of anarhcy fanficton #sons of anarchy fluff #jax teller imagine #jax teller fanfiction #jax teller x you #jax teller x reader #jax teller x oc #samcrow #jax teller fluff #charlie hunnam #fix it fanfiction #jax teller smut #charlie hunnam imagine #charlie hunnam fanfiction #jackson teller

[joshuasearing]

Monday 4th March 2024

Hey journal so this morning I woke up and kept on ignoring my alarm until I went to sleep for another hour. I then once went to sleep had a weird ass nightmare and it’s left me feeling freaked out and I woke up sweating. So in the dream my parents had bought me this really small baby water snake. Basically I was feeding it then before I knew it animals kept on appearing in my room and the animals were just getting bigger and bigger. So I was freaking out as they were getting really big and scary. So I ran down stairs told my mum However she said she was doing work, but I constantly told her I needed her upstairs. Then at one point me and my mum and dad were downstairs. We saw this massive snail like half the size of me on are tv cabinet downstairs in the living room. Then we watched it fall of the cabinet and move towards us it was so scary. In hopes it would go away my mum just fed it my brothers toys and it was eating them so quickly. Then we decided to open are back door to the garden and threw some fruit outside. So we threw a bunch of bananas outside and no word of a lie this snail inhaled these bananas it was so scary in my nightmare. It literally didn’t take the skin of it literally ate about a banana every second with the skin on. Then also we found this massive red spider in my room. It was just such a freaky nightmare. Anyways once I woke up I spoke to my dad about it, then got ready to leave the house and go to the gym. Then I quickly left the hour and made my way to the bus stop. Once I got to bus stop very quickly the bus arrived. I then got the bus to the gym. Once I got to the gym I had an energy drink. Then I did a bit of biceps and recorded some exercises I did. Then Morgan turned up and we trained shoulders, forearms and also chest. We spoke a lot but we did also train hard. Then once he left I did 10 minutes on the treadmill. Also I saw a couple people I knew in the gym today. One was a girl tattooist that works in the tattoo shop where I get my tattoos done. Then I spoke to her a little bit. Then I also saw Owen which is boy I met in the gym and speak to when I see him there. I spoke to him a little bit after going 10 minutes on the treadmill. Then I walked home and listened to some music. I also stopped at the shops and got myself a meal deal. I ate and drank some on the way home. I then had the sandwich once I got home. Since I have been home I have watched some rocket league on YouTube, posted on Instagram and now I am just writing in here. Anyway I will speak to you later journal, bye journal!

Here are some photos from today! ⬇️

#daily journal #my hobby #journal #my writing #my words #my journal #writing #photos #my journey #journalling

[deerblossoms]

SO! hashtag in washington and ****** and i have made out many times and apparently i was once a sort of bad kisser but now i suck less (literally). it’s embarrassing but i will live and ****** is too kind to dwell on it. i think i just get possessive. i want to eat them. have them all to myself. when i kiss their neck they make a lot of noises and i like that. <- i wrote this before i went back to new york. anyways here’s some me updates: i cut my hair a few weeks ago and it’s finally starting to settle into something nice, i was off my T shot for weeks but i just took it last night. god i get so scared about taking it now and it’s fascinating! i used to be totally fine at the start and now it’s a ten minute psych-up + panic attack. blargh. everything was totally fine in both new orleans and washington, my old feelings for luna did not come rushing back to consume me, my parents never found my septum piercing OR my tattoo or that i went to the halloween party ****** invited me to! just a sexy sexy week and a half. quite literally. i was stressed about what would become of margarita and i once i left and we didn’t actually talk about whatever it was that we were doing, but we’re fine. we’re genuinely totally fine and i’m fine. i have therapy tomorrow! i think. the appointment hasn’t been confirmed but it’s when i was supposed to have it. i don’t even know what i’ll say to them. i feel a little clammy lately. i’ve been thinking seriously about getting into the editor/publishing business. obviouslyyyy it won’t be as simple for me as it was for jess in gilmore girls but i think it’s the right thing for me to pursue. i hit my 30 book goal for the year! passed it, actually. i just finished reading the secret history by donna tartt and my god is that good. and i saw kim again! we had a really wonderful conversation. i feel a lot more comfortable in my own skin recently. sometimes i still have those moments where i feel shitty and nasty but i feel so much more settled. things with jo and i are good. i am a little jealous of him in two ways, that he’s got so many friends who see him all the time and also that he has SO many friends and coworkers he hangs out with and talks to outside of work. how does he do it!! how does everyone else but me manage to do it. i don’t know why i can’t hack it and i feel so stupid and lonely. i guess that’s what i should talk about in therapy. but things between us are good. so good i’m considering moving to pasadena for him but i know, i know i know it’s a bad idea. but he DID admit he has feelings for me, finally. actually right now i think my biggest stressor is the book i’m binding for him. i have to put the photos in it, write the foreword, design the cover, and then get the paper to print it on, print it and bind it. and i have one month. it’s POSSIBLE i’m just about to work a lot and it’s stressing me out a little. a lot. it’s stressing me out a lot. i HAVE to do this i have to get it done in time i have never been this dedicated to finishing a project before. i’m going to his birthday party and i’m so nervous about mingling with everyone. i apologized to shayne though, which was necessary and a weight off my back. and i watched the new york indie rock band doc, which i really loved and letterboxd hated for some reason. pretentious film criticism is when people disagree with my opinions online 👍👍👍 if anyone was wondering. i feel like that movie really revived my love for nyc and made me ask myself the age old question again which is, do i really want to move out of the city or do i just want to live near my friends? if jo and margarita and gabby lived here it wouldn’t even be a question. but they don’t, and i’m lonely. either way, if i don’t move next year i should probably quit my job. THOUGH if i can’t find somewhere cheaper to live i’ll have to stay. this is sooooo complicated

[theliterateape]

The Archeology of a Life

by Don Hall

"It is only with greatest care that memory can be kept from becoming a prison or a gallows." — The Orville

The giant area rug isn’t mine. This rug is her grandfather’s rug. It’ll be the last thing rolled up.

I’ve moved a lot in my lifetime. The process of culling through the barnacles that follow us from place to place can be bittersweet but necessary. This is familiar.

I’ve already purged every single photo of her. I don’t know if this is healthy, this cleansing of reminders of the past, but it’s the way I’ve done it with every other failed relationship so there’s no reason to doubt the act. I don't even know if the label failed is even appropriate. Certainly, if the promise was for life, they are failures. Maybe a more realistic way of seeing these adventures is to call them failed attempts with the emphasis on the attempt part. We tried, hard, but it didn't make it past it's sell-by date.

I don’t have a single photo of my first marriage or wife, only a few theater photos of my second, none from the four year non-marriage, and now nothing from my third marriage. To quote John Irving, it’s better to imagine something than it is to remember something. Pictures force the kind of remembrance that is diminishing, a forced revisitation of good times had that reopen the wounds of betrayal.

I look around and can only find a few tokens of these four big relationship attempts and I think that’s just fine. A leather jacket. A Las Vegas mug. A copy of a Tucker Carlson book signed by the author to infamous Weather Underground leader Bill Ayers signed to me as his snarky birthday joke. A quilt. A few pipes.

Existing reminders I can't get rid of are the tattoos. The first of eleven my mom got me just after the second divorce. It's a theater quote in German as representation that she and I were active in DADA theater for years. The Hunter S. Thompson quote refers directly to the non-marriage. One line of poetry written by the third. On my back right shoulder is the botched sixth anniversary tattoo she conceived of and had executed by a guy who was tremendously sexy but couldn't speak a word of English and has what looks like a young Donald Trump in a half shell rather than the intended baby. I can't see it so I don't think too much about but it is a great story in the vein of a Breaking Bad episode.

The IKEA shelves come down. We bought them when we moved into our Vegas apartment. She fought me, pouted in the store because I was going to get them anyway. I'm keeping them because they're cool and will fit nicely in a studio apartment somewhere else.

The artwork comes down. Like the rug, I'll drop some of this over into her patio before I leave town. When she initially moved out, she asked if I wanted a few pieces she purchased or was gifted while we lived in Chicago. At the time I did. Now, as I purge as many reminders we had ever met, I've reconsidered. The idea of eventually cracking open the moving pod to set up camp somewhere and being punched in the face with art she brought to the relationship isn't appealing.

My Bennigan’s wall of keepsakes and nonsense including mementos of trips taken and experiences had all go into a tub for the next time I have my own place. The devil mask given to me by Chuck Palahniuk. The Eiffel Tower I bought in Paris on our first anniversary. The London Bridge I bought in London on our fifth anniversary. The bobblehead of myself my mom had made. The ink drawing of Snake Plissken Joe gave me. Wild Wild West playing cards.

I'm like an archeologist of my own dig. I find in a tub that hasn't been looked at since maybe before I left Chicago two of my high school year books. I peruse them, remembering that I'll be, at least temporarily, moving back to Kansas and perhaps seeing some of those folks from forty years ago. A pair of bowls I purchased when I moved to Edgewater nearly ten years past. A mug given to me by Bill Kurtis. Brass knuckles I found years ago in Chicago.

Coming home from a show one night, I look down as I was walking to my door and saw, glistening in the rain, a true blue pair of authentic brass knuckles. Illegal in the city, someone must have been running from the cops or just ditched them in a hurry but there they were.

I picked them up, wiped them dry and stared in the palm of my hand at this archaic but still potent piece of metal designed for 1930's toughs to pummel the shit out of other thugs.

Maybe it was happenstance, a random encounter with an object in a world filled with such things. Perhaps it was destiny. And possibly it was the strange, comical Loki of the Mind giving me a clue to the jigsaw puzzle. I keep it on my Bennigan's wall next to the switchblade someone gave me as a gift. Not because I'll ever likely use it—those days are long past me now and thankfully so.

Not as a weapon but as a reminder. As I grow older and over halfway into my fifth decade on this tortured rock, as I spend my days writing and wondering, these knuckles marked A-R-M-Y across the surface are a reminder that I may yet still have some fights to fight. I may just yet have some life I have neglected to live.

"The book says, "We might be through with the past, but the past ain't through with us." — Jimmy Gator

I suppose I do my level best to erase certain aspects of my past. As I head to Kansas, I'll embrace the beginning again. Back home. The launching pad from which I shot out to Chicago in 1989 and, in many ways, that was a magnificent decision.

I'm at a crossroads. I have some choices to make. Which direction will I follow? What will the costs be and will the trade-off for my time be enough to keep me from wasting it in the pursuit of things unworthy of the marvels of life?

The overwhelming sense of leaving the pain in the dust, the refusal to suffer, and the new stuff I'll add to my tubs of stuff is nothing if not hopeful.

[navybrat817]

Permanent

Pairings: Bucky Barnes x Female Reader, Steve Rogers x Female Reader, Bucky Barnes x Female Reader x Steve Rogers Summary: Bucky and Steve brand their best girl. Word Count: Over 6.6k Warnings: Explicit sexual content, vaginal sex, unprotected sex (wrap it before you tap it), spitroasting, threesome, dirty talk, tension, possessive behavior, porn with feels (it’s me, c’mon), tattooed Bucky Barnes and Steve Rogers (they’re warnings, okay?) A/N: Welcome back to my tattoo AU! Have you missed them? I know I have! Beta read by the wonderful @whisperlullaby ​but any and all mistakes are my own. Thank you, lovely! Banner created by yours truly, but Bucky and Steve photos were provided by the talented @nix-akimbo ! This AU wouldn’t exist without them. Divider by the beautiful @firefly-graphics and banners by the lovely @vase-of-lilies. And thanks to @lookiamtrying and @drabblewithfrannybarnes for our new reader nickname.

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It was a beautiful day as you sat between Bucky and Steve in Thor’s truck, gazing through the windshield as the three of you drove through town. The boys had just finished setting up your new dining room table and Thor was kind enough to let them use his truck to pick it up and deliver it from the store. Ever since you moved into their place, they had done everything in their power to make the place more like your own. That included upgrading some of the furniture, which you tried to talk them out of in the beginning. You didn’t want them turning their home upside down for you. They, of course, argued that it was your home now, too.

Not to mention, one of them usually dropped their knees and buried their face between your legs if you protested too much. They didn’t play fair. And you never expected them to. Your beautiful, tattooed bastards.

You looked between them and took a moment to appreciate the view. Bucky smirked at you as he caught your eye. He was growing his hair out a bit and you were half tempted to tug on it. You turned your attention to Steve, who smiled softly as he looked away from the road for just a moment. You wished you could feel his beard scrape along your skin. 

I'll never get enough of them.

“How did you manage to get Thor’s truck again?” You asked as Steve turned onto the main street. “I thought this was his baby. Or is that his recliner in the basement?”

“His recliner is his other baby. And we may have promised you’d cook him dinner,” Bucky answered, rubbing small circles on your thigh as you gasped.

“You did what? Do you know how much he eats?” You teased as the brunette laughed.

“We did not. Thor was just being nice,” Steve smiled. The boys refused to let anyone else deliver the furniture since they were in good enough shape to move things themselves. “He’s also probably trying to win more brownie points with Mrs. Monroe by looking generous.”

“I think he has plenty, especially since he helped us move my stuff,” you grinned. Mrs. Monroe was sad to see you leave your old place and you were as well. She was a great neighbor and one of the many to be on your side when Grant and Billy harassed you. You also knew she had a soft spot for Thor and hoped that her granddaughter would end up with him. “I might make him dinner though so I can remain his favorite, until he gets a girlfriend."

“You think you’re his favorite?” Steve laughed a little.

“Yes,” you and Bucky said at the same time.

More laughter filled the truck, the sound almost as bright as the weather. "He does have a soft spot for you," Steve agreed. 

"Even Loki likes you, but don't tell him we said that," Bucky winked.

Heat flooded your cheeks. Being part of their group sometimes felt like an out of body experience. Most people around town looked at you differently now, but in a good way. Dating two of the most prominent tattoo artists around changed everything for the better. You wore confidence like a second skin. It looked good on you.

"Thor should be stopping by the shop later today. He wants to see the finished product," Steve told you.

Your wrists tingled as he mentioned the shop. Today was the day you were finally getting your tattoos. One from each of them, designed by them, just for you. It was a way to show you were theirs. Maybe one day, down the road, I’ll get a ring. And only if they want that.

“You nervous about today?” Bucky questioned, all traces of teasing gone. Both kept asking if you really wanted to go through with getting your tattoos and would’ve understood if you wanted to back out. They seemed nervous leading up to today, too, making sure you wanted to stick to the appointment.

Do they think I’ll back out?

“Nope, not nervous,” you put your hand over his, your other reaching for Steve’s as he glanced at you. He looked slightly relieved. “Why would I be?”

“Because what we’re giving you is permanent,” Steve replied. 

For some reason, it felt like he wasn’t talking about tattoos. “Yeah, they are and I want them. You can’t change my mind,” you told them, squeezing their hands. Bucky slowly breathed out. Was he expecting me to change my mind? “And if they’re anything like any of your tattoos, I know I’m in for a treat.”

The boys were littered in gorgeous tattoos. You loved them all because every single one of them had a story or significance behind them. They shared similar tattoos, like the rose each of them had for strength and courage. They each had a variation of the Brooklyn Bridge so they would never forget where they came from. And, of course, the symbol for their time in the military, honoring the unit they bonded with. Those were just a few.

"Steve designed something beautiful," Bucky said proudly.

"So did you, Buck," Steve stated just as proudly. 

It warmed your heart how much they lifted each other up. "Did either one of you happen to design an animal?" you asked curiously. Bucky had a white wolf to symbolize resilience and survival, a reminder of adjusting to life with his metal arm. Steve had an eagle for strength and courage, always standing up for the people around him. 

"Thought you wanted the designs to be a secret," Bucky said as the truck came to a stop. 

"I do and I know that they'll be perfect. I'm just," you tried to find the right word. It wasn’t nerves. You wouldn’t lie to them about that. "Antsy? Yeah, I’m a little antsy."

"What can we do to help?" Steve asked, unbuckling his seatbelt.

"Tell us," Bucky urged as he shifted to face you, removing his seatbelt, too. You were shocked that the three of you fit in the space with how big they were. Then again, Thor was even bigger and he managed just fine. 

"Nothing. I'm fine. Really," you promised. My beautiful boyfriends, ready to jump if I asked them to. "Maybe we could go for a dip. We had so much fun last time."

You smirked as you glanced between them. Steve’s hand tightened into a fist and Bucky licked his lips. You knew they were looking back on that day in Thor's pool, how they unashamedly had you between their bodies, making you feel good and not caring that their friends were nearby to witness it. They never hid their need for you. If anything, they were proud of it.

“Thor won’t be home for awhile,” Bucky said nonchalantly, his hand sliding higher up your leg. Your thighs parted, your body instinctively in tune with theirs. “We could go for a swim.”

“Not breaking into his backyard,” Steve argued, but you heard the slight strain in his voice as his hand went to your other thigh. “We can find a way to take some of the edge off."

"Not to point out the obvious, but this isn't the best space for it," Bucky said, a disappointed look in his eyes as he looked at his best friend. "And Thor might kill us if we get stains on the seats."

You had to smile. The man was built like a god and seeing him angry wouldn't be a pretty sight. "Well…" you trailed off as you looked over your shoulder, into the empty bed of the truck. “Plenty of space back there.”

Bucky swung his head with a grin, moaning a bit. “Right here in the street, doll?”

“Technically, we wouldn’t be in the street. We’d be in the truck,” you teased, starting to close your legs. “But if you two aren’t up for that-”

Lips pressed firmly against yours before you could finish that thought, Bucky’s hand gently gripping your chin to keep you in place. “We have a blanket, Steve?” 

“We do,” he answered, reaching back to grab it from behind his seat. He also kept your legs open before you could shut them further. “And we have that thin cushion Thor let us use, too.”

“Good. Wouldn’t want you to get uncomfortable. Speaking of uncomfortable,” Bucky smirked as he took your hand and placed it on his crotch. “Got me nice and hard, doll. Barely touch me and that’s what you do. Punk’s straining in his pants, too. Won’t feel better ‘til we’re inside you.”

You palmed the brunette as a rush of heat went through you, glancing over at Steve as he opened the door. The tent in his pants was evident as he got out. “And unless we want to scare the neighbors, we should hurry.”

“I don’t think ‘scare’ would be the word,” you said as Bucky pushed his door open. You wondered just how much of exhibitionists your boyfriends were at heart. The potential to get caught did make it fun and they weren't the type to be embarrassed about it if you were. At most, Steve would give whoever found them a sheepish smile. And both would easily charm their way out of it if someone got upset.

Bucky helped you out, your head spinning a bit as he pulled you to the back of the truck. Steve was already in the bed, making sure the cushion was situated. Bucky hopped in beside him, not making a sound as he unfolded the blanket. How do they move so quickly and quietly? 

Both held out a hand to help you in and you relished in how dark their gazes were as they pulled you in. You hardly had a chance to crawl on the cushion before Steve kissed you, the hidden hunger surfacing as Bucky moved behind you. Fuck, we’re really doing this here. Why did I suggest this? Why didn’t I suggest this sooner?

“Gonna look so pretty with our ink on you,” the blonde said, kissing along your jaw. 

“Almost as pretty as you look when you come on our cocks. That what you need, doll? To get our dicks nice and wet before we leave a mark on you?” the brunette added, his large hands roaming your trembling body. 

“Yes, fuck. Please,” you moaned.

“We need it, too,” Bucky’s mouth against your neck only turned you on more, the need to be ruined consuming you. 

Your hands quickly covered Steve's when he gripped your skirt, pulling you out of your dizzying state for a moment. "Don't you DARE destroy this skirt. It's one of my favorites."

"We'll buy you a new one," Bucky swore, toying with the fabric from behind you. 

"You will not because you are not ruining this one," your tone not giving them a chance to say otherwise. I’m running out of clothes, but I could have worse problems.

"Okay," Steve agreed easily, pushing your skirt up. "Won't destroy this one."

You were about to thank him when he smirked over your shoulder and exchanged a look with Bucky. His metal hand brushed along your covered mound before he gripped the thin material and ripped it away. "Bucky!"

"You said not to destroy your skirt. Not your underwear, which is soaked. Always so wet and ready for us."

Add that to the list of ruined clothes. Why do I bother with underwear?

“But we don’t want you too sore,” Steve said, running a finger along your slit. “So only one cock is filling our sweet pussy.”

You whined because you wanted both of them inside you. “Steve-”

“You can take both our cocks tonight at home. We'll take it slow, doll. Get you nice and stretched out for us," Bucky promised, his voice dripping with desire as Steve slipped a finger in. "Make you beg just a little 'cause it's so fucking pretty when you beg."

You clenched around the digit, trying in vain to feel him deeper. “I should make you both beg for me.”

“We’ll both get down on our knees and beg to have you forever if we have to,” Bucky whispered, unexpected tenderness in his voice given the heated situation.

“Forever,” Steve echoed, his gaze soft as he touched your cheek with his free hand. You almost questioned if something was up when he removed his finger, making you whine. The two of them exchanged a look again before you were manhandled, put on your hands and knees. You scrambled for a moment, practically tearing at Steve’s pants to get his cock out.

“Desperate for us?” he smirked, helping you unbutton his jeans to push them down.

“No more than usual,” you grinned. If they don’t have any shame, why should I?

"Ready for us, doll?" Bucky asked, hearing him shift slightly, likely discarding his pants. "Bet you'll be nice and calm with our come in your greedy holes."

You looked over your shoulder, tightening around nothing as he stroked himself. "You know I will be. So either fuck me or I'll do it myself," you threatened impatiently.

Steve grabbed your chin, careful not to hurt you as he forced you to look at him. "As fun as that would be to watch," he smirked, teasing your lips with the tip of his cock. "Buck's right. You need us to fill you up."

Your eyes slipped shut for a blissful moment as you opened your mouth, Steve's length slowly sliding along your tongue. You wiggled your ass enticingly, your pussy empty and aching. Moaning, you felt Bucky grip a hip as he pressed the head against your wet hole, the cock in your mouth pushing deeper.

"Breathe, sweetheart," Steve gently reminded you as Bucky began to push in. 

You spread your legs a bit wider, making a small sound as you inhaled through your nose. Feeling both of them in you was always satisfying, your body welcoming them home where they belonged. I love them so much. You hollowed out your cheeks as they moved in tandem, already giving you what you needed. They read you so well.

"Holy shit," Steve slid his hand to the back of your head, fucking your mouth in shallow thrusts as you sucked harder. "That's it, sweetheart."

"Pussy's gripping me like a vice, doll. What's got you so excited?" Bucky stretched over your back a bit as they both moved faster, pressure already burning in your core. "That anyone can see us? Or that they'll see that you're ours?"

You could only moan in response, clenching around them. I'm yours. All yours. Want everyone to know. More, please, please. The groans and pants they let out spurred you on, doing your best to take them in as deep as you could.

"Take it," Steve groaned as he worked his hips. "Take everything we give you."

You took every inch as they kept the steady pace, your clit throbbing as they pushed and pulled you between them. You whimpered as they brought you closer to the edge, the pleasure so hot inside you it almost burned you. Feeling Bucky's balls slap against you as he kept up the steady pace, and hearing Steve's pants as he slid across your tongue, wasn't enough. You needed them to give that final push.

"She's close. Squeezing me so fucking hard," Bucky groaned as he leaned over you, grinding deep into you as his hand moved quickly to your front. You nearly screamed around Steve as Bucky's fingers found your clit, rubbing in time with his thrusts. "Oh, that's it. Fuck, still sound so beautiful with your mouth full. Almost there."

Fuck. Don't stop, don't stop, don't stop. Please, make me come.

You managed to meet Steve's gaze as the knot inside you got closer to tightening and snapping, his blue eyes as commanding as his voice when he grunted, "Come for us."

The tension exploded, your body shuddering through your orgasm as you spasmed around Bucky's cock. The breath would've been stolen from your lungs if you weren't choking on Steve. Little whimpers left your throat as you trembled, hearing both men swear as they sped up. You wished it didn’t have to end, but you needed to feel them fill you up.

“Fuck, so fucking good,” Bucky moaned, driving into you until he buried himself to the hilt, spilling hot and thick inside you. "Fuck," he hissed as you milked him, wanting every drop he could give you.

Steve throbbed in your mouth, feeling him harden more, before he stilled and came down your throat. He said you would take everything they gave you and he was right. He gasped as he slid out, sitting back as Bucky managed to keep you from collapsing. It was perfect.

They’re so fucking perfect.

You felt Steve’s lips against yours, giving you a soft and lazy kiss, as Bucky pulled out of you. He helped you stretch out so you could rest a little, all of you smiling as you panted. You were sated, at ease and it was just what you needed.

“So,” you breathed, smiling wide. “That happened.”

“Believe it or not,” Steve smiled a bit. “We needed that, too.”

“For good luck?” you teased.

“Yeah. We’ll call it that,” Bucky said, kissing your forehead before you heard loud footsteps approaching the truck.

Oh, shit.

“What in heavens have you done?!” 

You almost gave yourself whiplash as you sat up, your eyes wide as they locked with a pair of thunderous blue eyes. “Thor?”

You scrambled to make yourself presentable, but the boys made no effort to cover up.

“Shall I ask again?!”

Thor’s booming voice made you cover your mouth. To anyone else, you would’ve looked shocked. Your boys, however, knew at this point that you were trying not to laugh.

“Here’s the thing. We-”

“You defiled her in the back of my truck,” Thor cut Bucky off. 

Yes. Yes, they did.

“Technically, we-” Steve tried to say calmly as he tucked himself away.

“You’ve already desecrated my pool, which I have no issue with,” Thor reminded them. We may revisit that pool. “But here? My sacred vessel?!”

You made a noise similar to a snort as your boyfriends looked at you for help. Tempted to say it was all their idea for looking so sexy. "Please, don't be mad at them. I suggested it. I was feeling antsy about my tattoos and they wanted to help," you explained, your eyes downcast when you finished. "I'm sorry."

"Oh, no, no, no," Thor said quickly, his hands raised in a surrendering gesture as you hid your smile. "I would never be upset with you."

Oh, Thor, you are so screwed if you end up dating a Monroe. She'll turn her doe eyes on you and you'll melt.

"But you two will give this a thorough cleaning," he pointed between your men. "I shall take my bike for the time being."

"Thank you for understanding," you smiled as you lifted your gaze.

"Of course. And I shall see you at the shop. Do not worry. You're in good hands," he promised. "As you are already well aware."

"You're helping us wash this," Bucky said as Thor walked toward his garage. 

"Not a chance," you smirked, nearly jumping when Steve affectionately pinched your side. 

"I'm already thinking of ways you can make it up to us," he said.

You are the man with a plan.

The gentle noise of the needles and conversations in the Howling Commandos shop made you smile as you waited in your chair. You never expected those sounds to become some of your favorites, but life surprised you. And thanks to the earlier activities and a hearty meal, you felt much more relaxed. 

"How are you so calm?" Mandy demanded, plopping down in the chair across from you. "How?!"

You had to laugh as your shoulders lifted in a casual shrug, not mentioning the pleasant ache between your thighs. "Needles don't bother me, I want these tattoos and I trust them," you recited easily. You had no reason to be nervous, especially since you knew they'd handle you with care.

Mandy narrowed her eyes, leaning forward as she tapped a finger against the armrest. “They fucked you before they opened the shop, didn’t they?”

Might just make it a morning ritual, which it kind of is. “You say that like it’s a bad thing.”

“Where?” she asked suspiciously.

“Back of Thor’s truck.”

"Naughty girl. You know he loves his truck,” she shook her head with a grin. “And I can't believe you're letting them ink you without them telling you what they're branding you with.”

"Seriously, why do you make everything they do sound so dirty?"

"Because they are dirty. You have permanent bowleggedness or whatever it's called since they can't keep their dicks out of you," she teased, raising an eyebrow as you began to laugh. She isn't wrong. "Surprised you're not knocked up."

"Not this again," you groaned as your laughter died down, pinching the bridge of your nose. Ever since you moved in with Bucky and Steve, Mandy constantly asked when you were getting married and having babies. You expected it from everyone else, but not your best friend.

In hindsight, I should have. 

"Yes, this again. Have you guys talked about it?"

"We’ve talked a bit about it,” you answered, shifting a bit in your seat. “They both want a future with me and to build a home together. I want that, too. For the time being, we're enjoying living together. Isn't that enough for you?"

"Is it enough for you? You haven't imagined wedding bells or anything like that?" Mandy asked knowingly.

You glanced at the ring finger of your left hand. "Of course, I have," you admitted. You were in love with your boyfriends and you wanted to marry them. The fact that Steve gave love another chance after a failed engagement and Bucky was willing to share his love and a partner with his best friend still made you want to pinch yourself.

I hope they know how much I appreciate them letting me in.

"I fucking knew it!" Mandy yelled loud enough to make the shop go silent. 

"You knew what?" Bucky called back.

"That she's going to marry you and Steve so you can make an honest woman out of her," she smirked as you flipped her off. It didn't bother her in the slightest.

"She'd be making honest men out of us, too," Steve chimed in as Bucky chuckled. 

You swung your head to where your boyfriends were sitting, each of them finishing up with a couple of regular clients. They really do make me throb just by looking at them. How is that possible? And what’s that look they just gave each other?

“It may be your pussy that brings them to their knees, but they’re on my side when it comes to your future.”

“Please, don’t encourage her,” you begged as Mandy grinned proudly. “And worry about your own pussy.”

“That’s my job,” Natasha smirked as she appeared with a glass of water, handing it to you. “And I have to agree that you have nothing to worry about. You’ll love what they came up with.”

“You’ve seen them?” you asked, taking a sip. 

“No, but they discussed them a bit. Minus each other, they want you to be the first to see them.”

“And they’re really going to do her at the same time?” Mandy smirked.

The redhead smirked back at her girlfriend. “They are. Should be quite the show.”

You looked between them suspiciously. “You’re both going to watch?” you asked. You knew Thor wanted to stop by to see them, even though he had the day off, but Nat wanted to see them, too?

“It’s not every day I get to see two of my favorite boys do their favorite girl. Might even tape it.”

Everything is a sex joke with this group. Deviants. All of them. “Who said I was going to let anyone watch? How can I be the first to see them when they’re done if you’re here?”

Mandy gasped at the suggestion that you might not let her stay. “Oh, come on! You held my hand when I got mine and I won’t be able to hold yours, so you can at least let me watch. Please?”

“Of course, you can stay. I was just giving you a hard time, like you give me,” you grinned as she relaxed in her seat. It was nice that she wanted to be there. And Bucky did such a great job with her tattoo, even with how scared she had been. "You invite anyone else?"

"Not Peggy," Mandy coolly replied.

"Be nice," you urged. Peggy didn't come around or bother you. She was usually busy helping Sharon and Briana. You half expected there to be drama after everything with her, along with Grant and Billy, but things were peaceful.

"You be nice. I'll be a bitch."

“That’s enough of that,” Natasha shot Mandy a look. Both of you knew your best friend was still being protective of you. “Clint and Sam want to see. Tony may even swing by.”

“Did you invite everyone?” you asked suspiciously. It seemed a little strange. Why would they all want to see them?

“The boys are excited,” she responded. Her face gave nothing away as she patted your shoulder, so you dropped it. “Relax. They’re almost ready for you.”

I would relax more if I didn’t see Mandy wink at you. What are they up to? And why haven’t they clued me in?

True to Natasha’s word, Thor, Clint and Sam were all standing nearby chatting a few minutes later. Did they clear their schedules for this? You narrowed your eyes as you looked at your boyfriends. They whispered to each other as their clients paid and left. And for the first time today, they looked nervous.

Are they scared I’m going to hate my tattoos?

You turned your head when the bell above the door rang, your eyebrows shooting up as Tony Stark walked in moments later with a bottle in his hand. He would wear sunglasses in the shop. It somehow worked.

“Didn’t start the party without me, did you?”

“It isn’t a party, Stark,” Natasha reminded him.

“Is that right? I thought we were celebrating,” he smirked, winking over at you. “Not every day these boys are naughty in the back of Point Break’s truck.”

Thor gave you a sheepish look before you could say anything. “I wasn’t going to tell him, but he’s very persuasive.”

“And the worst person to keep a secret. It just happened this morning,” you said, expecting one of the boys to jump in and say something. They were still whispering to each other. “Everything okay?” you called out to get their attention.

The wide eyed looks they gave you almost made you laugh. Almost. “Sorry. You ready?”

“Ready as I’ll ever be,” you said.

“And I resent that. I can keep a secret,” Tony argued as he set the bottle down at one of the stations. “No drinks until you’re done.”

You got a look at the label as he walked away. It was very expensive. “All that for a couple of tattoos?”

“Let’s get started,” Steve said as Tony opened his mouth, cutting him off.

The antsy feeling began to creep in as Natasha whispered something in Clint’s ear, bringing a devilish grin to his face. Sam appeared to be casual, but there was an excited glint in his eyes. Thor looked like he couldn’t stand still and Mandy…

“Are you crying?” you asked her. She has tears in her eyes. Actual tears.

“Nope. Not crying,” she swore, blinking rapidly as Nat held out her hand for her to take. “Just happy for you.”

“This is weird. You’re all acting weird,” you said as Bucky and Steve took their spots on each side of your chair. They had their machines and stencils nearby, but didn’t say anything about your comment. “Guys, what’s going on?”

“Nothing,” they said at once.

Bull-fucking-shit. “Are you two really that nervous?” you asked. These two had fought side-by-side, in and out of the military, and had seen their share of horrors. They were masters of their craft. They had nothing to fear about this.

Steve nodded slowly. You got a better look at him and saw how pale he was. “Maybe we’re feeling a bit antsy now. At least, I am.”

“I am a bit, too,” Bucky added, leaning over to give you a quick kiss. You noticed that his smile didn’t reach his eyes. “We want it to be perfect. It’s what you deserve.”

You felt small as the words sunk in, briefly reaching out to touch the tops of their hand. Maybe that’s why they wanted everyone here. Moral support was always a good thing. “You have nothing to be nervous about. I told you earlier, I trust you. I’m ready,” you promised. Your wrists were ready to be branded. They were artists and you allowed yourself to become their canvas.

The boys didn’t visibly relax, but you could feel that some of the tension was gone as you looked between them.

“You sure you don’t want to be blindfolded?” Sam joked.

“That’s for the bedroom only,” you teased back, making everyone laugh.

You exhaled as they cleaned your inner wrists with the rubbing alcohol. The cool sensation was almost a sense of false security since you knew you were going to feel at least some degree of pain shortly. The stencils went on next as you stared straight ahead. As tempted as you were to glance down to see them, you refused to look. 

“Since you’re not going to look,” Bucky grinned. “Do you trust where we’re putting these?”

“And from what we see, they’re nice and even,” Steve promised.

“Once again, I trust you,” you told them before they slowly pulled the paper away.

You smiled as Mandy got her phone out to take a picture, waiting patiently as the boys got their machines ready. You really did admire how seriously they took their job for every single client and you were no exception. They ran a clean, safe shop. You were in the best hands.

“Deep breaths,” Bucky softly reminded you once they were ready, checking his machine once more. 

“And try to stay still,” Steve added. They warned you that the lining would likely be the most painful part of the process, with any shading or coloring afterwards hurting less. “If it’s too much, tell us.”

You nodded quickly. Deep breaths. Stay still. If I can take their cocks, I can take a couple of needles.

Though they warned you, the prickling sensation you felt on each wrist almost made you jump. The needles stung, as you expected, but you managed not to make a sound. You could feel their soothing touch through their gloves as they held your lower arms down. It was gentle, intimate and you firmly had to remind yourself not to be aroused.

They already came inside me once today and I don’t need to make a mess on this chair with everyone watching.

The conversations around you were in low tones, likely to put you at ease, and they had varying degrees of smiles on their faces. Even Mandy was unexpectedly silent as she took a couple of photos. You expected her to be a chatterbox, but she was likely being respectful of the boys to not distract them. You appreciated it.

“Doing great, doll,” Bucky praised, even though he didn’t lift his eyes. Steve did for a moment, giving you a tender smile, before he went back to work. And it was so much like them to balance giving you what you needed, which was assurance in different ways.

I love you both.

After a few minutes, the pain faded to a dulling sensation. Maybe it was adrenaline or your body getting used to it. You wouldn’t call a needle piercing your skin a pleasant feeling, but it wasn’t bad. It somehow felt like the right kind of pain. You could easily see why people didn’t stop at one tattoo.

“Still feeling okay?” Steve questioned as you nodded. “Do you need to take a break?”

“I’m fine. No break,” you said. 

Mandy held out her phone to show you the photos. She managed to block out your wrists, or maybe the boys were just shielding them that well. You somehow heard the bell over the needles, surprised to see Loki. He didn’t acknowledge anyone as he silently walked over to Thor.

Ha. Guess he really does like me.

“You ready to look?” Bucky asked as he looked up, both of them clicking their machines off. 

They’re done? How did they do that at the same time? “Yeah, I’m ready.”

“Which one first?” Steve smiled since you still hadn’t looked down. 

Instead of answering his question, you slowly lifted both arms and bent them at the elbow so both of your wrists were in view. So many emotions went through you as you saw them. “Oh, my god.”

On your left wrist was an eight-pointed star with what appeared to be tiny gem embellishments. On the end of each were alternates between tiny moons and suns. On your right wrist was the shape of a heart, but it was made out of multiple flowers. Above the heart were the words “Live Free” with three birds flying together.

“Before we explain what they mean, what do you think of them?” Bucky asked, his voice cracking a little.

“I love them. They’re so beautiful. They’re perfect,” you smiled between them. Their smiles almost blinded you and you knew how much love and care they put into creating these. “Thank you.”

They each gave you a kiss, the sweet feel of their lips even better than normal. You turned your wrists so everyone could see them. Mandy snapped a couple photos, shrieking as she did so.

“Those are gorgeous! You better put these on your wall.”

“Fit for a queen,” Thor said proudly as he admired them. 

Loki rolled his eyes, but a ghost of a smile was there. “Not bad.”

“That means he likes them,” Natasha said as Clint got his phone out. 

“Get together, you three,” he said, holding it up to take a photo

“We still need to wrap her wrists,” Steve argued, but he moved in and smiled so the picture could be taken. 

“Thought that was for the bedroom,” Sam joked, making Bucky laugh as Tony went to pour drinks.

I hope Clint got that in the photo. And where did Tony get the shot glasses from? “Yes, please let them wrap them so they can tell me why they designed these.”

You placed your arms back on the chair so they could apply the ointment and wrap. They went through the aftercare instructions with you before, but you were certain they’d go over them again. It wouldn’t hurt, especially since you didn’t want to do any damage to the beautiful designs they just made.

“Come here, come here,” Mandy said once you were wrapped, grabbing your hands to pull you out of the chair. You almost laughed when she pulled you away from the group, your back to them. “You’re happy?”

“I am. They’re wonderful,” you smiled.

“Not the tattoos,” she said, biting her lip. “You’re happy with them? With Bucky and Steve?”

You nodded slowly. You swore tears were filling her eyes again. “I am. I love them more than anything.”

She sniffled as she hugged you close. “They love you, too, you know? So fucking much." 

You patted her back a little, trying to figure out why she was so emotional. “I know they do. I’m lucky to have them.”

She hugged you tighter, sniffling again. “You’re my best friend and your happiness means the world to me.”

“Yours means the world to me, too,” you promised, leaning back and pushing her back gently by the shoulders so you could look at her. “But why are you being so emotional?”

Instead of speaking, she turned you around. Everyone was facing you, smiling as they held shot glasses in their hands. The only empty hands were Bucky and Steve’s, but they stood side-by-side with smiles as they gazed at you.

“What’s going on?” you questioned as you took a step forward.

Steve cleared his throat. “People have said at times that Buck and I are different, like night and day. The moon and the sun. So if we’re the moon and the sun, that makes you our star,” he explained as you glanced down at your left wrist.

“And your heart was one the things that drew us to you,” Bucky said as you lifted your gaze. His blue eyes had an extra shine to them as he smiled at you. “You reminded us of a flower. We got to watch you blossom into who you are and you’re a new beginning for both of us. You make us feel free.”

They stepped forward in sync, each reaching for your hand before they dropped to one knee. 

Wait. Are they… “Oh, my God,” you whispered.

“You’re our star, our heart and a piece of us we never want to be without,” Bucky told you, a tear falling from his eye. “You taught me how to love and not to be afraid of it, even for a second.”

“And you taught me to love again and to fight like hell to hang onto it,” Steve said proudly. 

You almost burst into tears as Bucky removed a box from his pocket. “Our friends have always been our family, but you are our home.”

You couldn’t stop the tears at that point, letting them spill freely as you smiled down at them. 

Bucky held up the box as Steve opened it, the three entwining bands shining in the light. You couldn't tell where one began and the other two ended. It was unbreakable. “We love you with everything we have,” the brunette swore.

“And always will,” the blonde added.

“Will you be our wife?” they asked together, both looking up at you with hope and love in their eyes. You knew in that moment you would forever be their first world. 

A watery laugh came out as you nodded. “Yes!”

"Against her better judgment she said 'yes'," Tony affectionately announced. "Drink!"

You heard Mandy burst into tears as Bucky slipped the ring on your finger, everyone cheering and downing their shot. None of it registered as you dropped to your knees, framing Bucky’s face to kiss him deeply. You let out another small, happy laugh before doing the same to Steve. You felt their arms wrap around you in a tight hug as you kept crying.

“Thank you, thank you, thank you,” Steve chanted in a whisper.

“Love you so fucking much, doll,” Bucky sniffled, smiling as he kissed your temple. “Or should we start calling you Blossom?”

You laughed again as you felt both of them begin to wipe your tears away. “I like Blossom,” you said, looking at the ring on your left hand. That explained everything. Your boys being nervous, why Mandy was so emotional and why everyone was there. They were all welcoming you home. Your beautiful tattooed bastards were your home.

Because like the new tattoos on your wrist, they had a permanent place in your heart. 

*****

Tattoo inspiration photos for our reader below.

Hope to see our boys again soon, especially since they have something to celebrate. Love and thanks for reading!

#navybrat writes #bucky barnes x reader #steve rogers x reader #bucky barnes x you #steve rogers x you #stucky x reader #stucky x you #bucky barnes x female reader #steve rogers x female reader #bucky barnes x reader x steve rogers #tattoo!bucky barnes x reader #tattoo!steve rogers x reader #tattoo au #howling commandos tattoo au #sebastian stan x reader #chris evans x reader #sebastian stan x female reader #chris evans x female reader #bucky barnes fanfiction #steve rogers fan fiction #sebastian stan fanfiction #chris evans fanfiction

[luimagines]

Hi! I have a request, but first i wanna say your writing is absolutely amazing! The length + amount of time you put into these prompts is insanely good. Now! Onto the request, how would the boys react to a reader from a more modern era? Maybe a more modernized hyrule or our current point in time?

Masterlist

Thank you so much for the compliment! I'm happy to see the response even if this blog is still relatively new.

I hope I do your prompt justice.

I probably could have done a headcanon list but I was hit with inspiration.

I also might have given Reader some backstory.

Scenario below the cut! It’s long, take caution.

It was a cool night, but you didn't mind. Your bed was warm, the WiFi was fast and even if it was three AM on a school night, you managed to keep yourself giggling with cat videos and blursed memes until the words and colors merged.

A night well spent.

But it led to questionable decisions.

Even if the shredded cheese in the fridge was beginning to seem a more and more enticing snack, your body was tempted to succumb to slumber.

Until a large purple light encompassed the entirety of your window.

Something was in your backyard.

Aliens. Your tired brain supplies and you sprint to the glass and push away the curtains. Is this it? Is this where I'm kidnapped and never seen or heard from again?

You pull out your phone and open up the camera.

"Pics or it didn't happen." You remind yourself and snap a few before showing your face.

What you see isn't what you're expecting. Instead of a flying saucer in the sky beaming down a laser or a weird pear shaped space craft on top of the grass, there's a single panel of glowing light, swirling with black accents that creeps in a circular motion.

"Cheese and crackers...." You gasp and begin to blatantly stare at it with no regard to whether something may be coming out of it.

You wait and nothing happens.

You wait some more and nothing happens.

You spend an hour watching this portal that has appeared out of nowhere, waiting for something to happen, willing for something to happen. But you get nothing.

The unknown stares right back at you, unblinking and unchanged.

Go through it. A voice tells you. What if there's something on the other side?

"I'm going to die." You gulp and take a deep breath.

Who else gets a chance like this? The voice talks again. This could be a grand step towards a more modern society. A whole new world could be on the other side, waiting, reaching out, calling to humanity!

You think you a see a shadow move behind the portal and out of sight but it’s gone before you can even process it.

"Should I call the police?" You step away from the window, ignoring the thoughts, the voice- you're too tired to know if it's your own any more. What's the plan? How does one go about something like this?

Where’s your sense of adventure? Pack a bag and go! What if it goes away?

That last thought seems to get through to your tired brain and for a reason beyond your understanding, it latches onto it.

Now you’re excited.

You run to the closet and take out your old backpack. It used to be for school but it was fancier since it was the only one you could get. The bag had a replaceable water bag with a plastic straw connected through the back of it and the straps have just worn down enough to where they’re actually comfortable. It doubled as a hiking backpack and came with its own insulated lunch box that clasped on the back of it.

It’ll finally serve its purpose.

You quickly roll up your favorite blanket and strap it in tightly beneath the lunch box. You’re quick to take out two extra outfits and pack them as well as change out of your pajamas.

Ok. What would you need? You don’t know where you’d be going so this has to a catch all kind of deal.

You pack away your swiss army knife first for good measure. A solar powered charger for your phone and an extra pair of socks follow suit even after you’ve picked out the extra clothes.

You take out the water bag and run to fill it all the way to max capacity as you think of any other necessities.

You’d need food. You have a small jar of peanut butter and granola bars that can fit in the lunch box. You can bring your extra water bottle and put in the side pockets of the backpack, and maybe bring some of those powered flavor packets your brother loves so much. You think he has lemonade and some green tea ones.

Those would be great. He won’t mind, hopefully.

You let the bag overfill momentarily before running back to shove it in your bag. with the lid screwed tight.

Next you run to the kitchen, grabbing the first things that you thought of already and begin to look around for more.

You grab an unopened pack of beef jerky, a bag of veggie sticks and a half eaten bag of dried mangos.

During your search you grab the water bottle and fill that too.

You return to your room with your bounty and begin to carefully put everything in the box. With some more deliberation, you run back to the kitchen and make yourself a quick sandwich, eat it, make another one and pack that as well.

You look out side the window and the portal is still there.

The sun is beginning to rise now so you’re trying to go as fast as you can, unless you want to neighbors to think something is going on.

Even if it is.

You’re about to leave but in a stroke of brilliance, you run to pack sunscreen and bug spray as well. You see a small first aid pack that was bought recently for when you would take your family vacation but you reason that it might one of the most important things you’d have if you got hurt.

Into the bag it goes.

You grab your hoodie before you leave the door, wrap it around your waist and pocket your phone, your headphones and your wallet.

You feel immediately under packed when you step outside and see the portal up close.

It’s weirdly triangle shaped, you think and step closer.

You reach your hand out and try to touch it. It feels as if you put your hand through a humidifier but it’s not wet. It’s misty and cold but not necessarily unpleasant.

An idea hits you right before you take your first step through.

You pull up one of the earlier photo’s you took and send it to your friend’s group chat. It showed up in my backyard. I decided to make a bad late night decision and I’m going through. If you never hear from me again, I want you all to fight over my electronics. Winner takes all. Godspeed.

And you step through.

You had first assumed that it would merely take you tot he other side but very quickly realize that you have to walk through it.

The first part still had a little light but with time, it got darker. So dark that you couldn’t even see your hand in front of your face.

You kept walking.

As fast as the light disappeared, it came back and you stepped into the light of an open field, right in front of one, two, three, four, nine males that had appeared to be traveling towards you or rather, towards the portal.

The portal disappears in the process.

“Oh so we didn’t have to go through it! We had to gain another member!” One of them yells. “Would have been nice to know before we packed everything up!”

“Ho boy, where am I?” You ask and tighten your grip on your backpack. Why didn’t I bring a weapon?

They all had long tunics and swords on their backs. Old fashioned leather boots and hand bracers were the norm in this group and you realized very quickly that your jeans and t-shirt had wildly missed the memo.

“Dang, I didn’t think I’d walk into a LARP group. Sorry about that.” You sheepishly smile. “I had no idea where the portal was going to take me. But if you would be so kind-”

“Wait, what’s LARP?” One of them speaks up. He was a dirty blond and somewhere in the middle of the group height wise. He wore a white cape like thing with blue designs on the back but you didn’t recognize the symbol.

“Live Action Role Play?” You tilt your head. “It’s why you’re all dressed like that? Right?”

“This is just our clothes.” What appears to be the youngest bounces up to you. “What are you wearing?”

“First I could grab in my closet.” You admit and look down on it. It’s one of your comfiest shirts and best looking pants. You’re a little proud of yourself for finding those in the dark.

“Weird.”

“We’re heroes. We’re all named Link.” Cape guy speaks up again. “Is it safe to assume that you’re in the same boat?”

“Heroes?” Your eyebrows furrow together. “I’m not a hero and my name’s not Link.”

You’re quick to tell them your name and you watch as the confusion covers their faces. “My brother’s name is Link though if that helps anything.”

“Oh we needed him!” The youngest groans and it instantly irks you.

“What would you need with a five year old?” You deadpan and cross your arms. 

The information stuns the group.

“The portal showed up in the middle of the night and I’m the one that went through it. I’m pretty sure I was the only awake to even see it. Are you telling me that it was for my little brother?” You’d be lying if you said that you weren’t a little pissed. “My baby brother was supposed to go through it? He was asleep! He’s five. What kind of logic is that?!”

“Well...” The biggest and oldest of them runs a hand over his face. You think he has some cool tattoos and sick scar going across his eye but he looks about as angry as you feel, so you don’t say anything. “It appears the gods truly do not care for the hero’s maturity, only his existence.”

“Ok...What’s with all this hero talk?” You bite back. “What did... Where am I?”

“Hyrule.” The second with cool face tattoos speaks up. He’s got a large fur pelt around his shoulders and you have to tighten your grip against your backpack again to keep from reaching out to touch it.

Even so you feel yourself deadpan even more. “Hyrule? Like the ancient empire? The one that collapsed more than two thousand years ago? That Hyrule?”

You’re inclined to not believe them and write all of them off as crazy... but you also walked through a portal. And your grandma did say that magic existed in the strangest forms.

They all share looks of concern and some begin to murmur quietly amongst themselves but you’re too far gone to even notice.

“Did I time travel?” The idea hits you like a bus and you feel your eyes widen as you stare beyond the group. You quickly take our your phone and unlock it.

No signal.

“Is that a type of Sheikah slate?” Someone asks you.

“I don’t know what that is.” You reply automatically. “Wait, hold on, what year is it?”

“Why don’t you tell us what year you’re from and we can start from there?” The darkest brunette of the group speaks up.

“202x PC” You say robotically, not really processing the world around you anymore.

“That’s...” The blond with a long blue scarf speaks up with a slight hiss. “...Beyond any of our timelines. You see, we all come from different worlds and eras of Hyrule’s history.”

“I don’t think you’re the farthest down anymore, Wild.”

“This would then make them my successor, right?”

“It would make their brother your successor.” Someone amends. “I think they just jumped in his place.”

“Leave my brother alone.” You snap back into the present, pocketing your [hone again. “Ok, you know what, screw it. I don’t know what you’d want my brother for but I’m here now. I’d gladly take his place if it means he gets to stay home!”

“Hey.” A boy with pink hair stalks up to you looking a little more serious than you’d like.

“Nice hair dude, way to defy the gender norms.” You smirk a little before genuinely grinning, hoping to quell the tension. “What product do you use? It looks like Artic Fox but not every place sells their brand.”

“...I have no idea what you’re talking about but what happened to Ganon in your world? How have you been handling it?” He snaps and places his hands on his hips.

“Ganon? Like my old principle? That’s a name I haven’t heard in forever.” You’re confused again. “Last I heard he joined the police force only to be reassigned out of state. I don’t know what’s happening with him. Kinda hope he gets fired though. He’s not a bad guy but he’s not someone you’d want in that kind of position of power, you know.”

“Police force?”

You blinked and look them all over. They look very medieval. “Oh... You don’t have that...”

You begin to think about your history lessons and what they might be familiar with if they’re telling the truth about being from Hyrule.

“Ya’ll got knights?”

Many, almost all of them nod, a few with face of despair already on them before you finish speaking.

“It’s kind of like that. Mixed with a towns guard position... kinda. They enforce laws... at least they’re supposed to but the whole system is flawed and racist and really needs to be dismantled for the abuse of power that they have-”

“Abuse? Of power?” You have their attention again.

“It’s stupid and it won’t really make any sense if I try to explain because I doubt you have anything similar but it’s basically a group of people given the right to treat the public in anyway they like for their own benefit because they have no one telling them that they can’t.” You groan and slowly begin to feel your lack of sleep catch up to you. 

You slowly reach to behind you and sit down on the dirt, looking at all of them. “Mr. Dragmire wasn’t like...Demise or anything but he was a huge jerk. No one liked him. He liked me though. I remember that. I was the envy of the whole school because I somehow got on his good side while everyone else wants to strangle him. I think he was transferred for some misdemeanor or something like that... like he might have been throwing hands with someone he wasn’t supposed to. I never heard all the details. I didn’t really care for it when it happened either. I’m pretty sure he lost that fight though. The dude looked like a blast of wind could have knocked him over let alone someone’s knuckle sandwich.”

“I would love to hear more about this.” The youngest sits next to you with a large grin on his face. His eyes are bright and his body language reminds you of your cousin Zelda. You instantly think they’d get along like a house on fire. “What are your monsters like?”

“Monsters?” You tilt your head. “Be a little more specific bud, it depends on where you’re from.”

“You have that many?!”

“It depends on if you believe they’re real or not.”

“Speaking of monsters, can you fight?” The shortest walks up to you. You like that his tunic is stitched up with multiple colors and designs. It gives it personality, you think. “Do you have a weapon you’re more comfortable with?”

The question throws you off your rhythm and you don’t fight your wince. “What would happen if I say that I do not, in fact, have any sort of weapon on me?”

“I wouldn’t believe you.” Pink guy speaks up again. “That pack is huge, there has to be something in there.”

“It’s food, water and extra clothes my guy.” You lean back against said backpack since it won’t let you lay down with it still on. “Not a lot of space for anything else. I’m pretty good at hand to hand combat though. Karate’s a good way to fight out stress.” 

“Your bag’s not magic?”

“Why the hell would it be magic? ...Are you trying to tell me magic actually exists?” You raise an eyebrow as your eyes begin to close against your will. “I know my grandma said it does but I thought she meant like fairies and shadow demons.. and bigfoot. Can’t forget him, he’s the real MVP... You know...Children’s bedtime stories and stuff like that, it’s not real. But like magic magic? Magic items and the like? Find me Tinkerbell and I’ll show you Neverland, that’s what I say.”

“Are you serious?”

“Second star to the right, straight on till morning.” You respond.

There’s a moment of silence as the group in front of you processes your words. It’s hard to tell their reaction since you’re not looking at them but you no longer have the energy to do anything else.

“Are you falling asleep right now?” It’s the one they called Wild.

“I...” You try to open your eyes. They don’t budge. “I haven’t slept in nearly 20 hours... I think. I might have past 24 hours a while ago actually. Portal showed up at like four in the morning... I had to get up at six and I didn’t sleep at all before then.”

More silence.

“Great another one.” Someone scoffs.

You snort.

“Why did we pack up camp again?”

“No one kill me.” You say right before you lose consciousness. “Please and thank you.”

“They’re doomed.”

“Have some faith Vet. They stepped in for their little brother. That has to mean something?”

“They’re in for a rude awakening, and that’s all I have to say about it.”

#linked universe #linkeduniverse #linked universe x reader #is this readers origin story #maybe? #i got a little carried away with this one #had to stop myself before i went even further beyond #i don't know if I want to continue with this as a story or just throw out some headcanons with modern reader #i like to think that everything i write takes place in a separate universe #especially the ones where they catch feelings #might throw out what they think of reader #might not #depends on you guys! #let me know what you think!

[averytiredfanfictionwriter]

Clan (Technoblade x demon!reader, Philza x demon!reader)

Word count- 2,210 Content Warnings- none that I can think of Ao3 link- right here.

My first post back in a while. I’m sorry about the absence to whoever might care- a lot of things popped up in my personal life that stressed me out, on top of my graduation fast approaching. But I’m back now, and this might not be the Karl or Ranboo fic that was promised, it is at least something. Those will both be coming within a week or two, I just need to finish up some stuff and then edit them. So follow if you want to see when I post those, or just reply on this post saying that you want to be tagged when I do post them. Enjoy! Reblogs are appreciated, as well as likes. So if you could just do both, that would mean the world to me!

Techno’s used to being alone. He lived the first hundred years of his life that way- until he met Phil. And then Phil left. And he was alone again. 

But when he met Y/n, that all changed. He never had to worry about being alone again. Immortals are rare, and meeting another one is even rarer, but the two were inseparable. She never disclosed where she was from, or what the tattoos of strange runes on her body meant, and Techno knew better than to pry into matters that didn’t concern him, but he couldn’t help but wonder what she was thinking about as she stared out the window with her eyes clouded over and memories of a past time playing in her mind.

When Phil came back, it was easy for the pair to fit him back into their lives. Even though Y/n had never met him before it was as if they’d known each other for centuries before then. The three easily settled into a calm daily routine and when they returned to their own houses in the little community they’d created for just them at night, they fell asleep having forgotten what life was like before they’d met. 

The three gods never worried about what would happen when they were found. After all, they’re immortal. They’ve lived to see the rise and fall of countries, rulers, and everything else. Them of all people know that nothing is permanent. But none ever stopped to consider that what they had wasn’t permanent.

It started when Techno woke up in the morning. The arctic always lent itself to freezing mornings but this one felt colder than the others. It could be because he had expected to wake up with Y/n and Phil next to him on the couch, and was surprised that they would go back to their own houses. But it was much more than that- even if Techno couldn’t have known.

Phil and Techno looked in silence for any trace of Y/n around their community when the sun hit the middle of the sky and she still hadn’t shown her face. Any places she might have gone off to in search of quiet or a place to nap. But that didn’t appear to be the case and their search turned up empty and in vain. 

Techno retreated into himself. He found the note she’d left when he and Phil returned from their search and he didn’t say anything, instead heading down to the basement in his small house and shutting himself in to work on ‘very important stuff’ as he told Phil. Phil didn’t believe him-  Techno wasn’t exactly quiet in expressing the emotions he felt about Y/n leaving.

Phil wasn’t quite as emotional as Techno. He was more than two hundred years older than the pink-haired man. He was used to the constant ebbing and flowing of life, of the appearance and then disappearance of people. That’s not to say it didn’t hurt, but he knew that it’s the way of life. People come, and then they go. To stop it would be to disregard the nature of humans as a whole.

He was a little surprised when Techno came back up at the end of the night and, while silent, had refused to acknowledge that she’d even existed there in the first place. He ignored the building next to his where she’d slept and kept her belongings. Whenever Phil tried to bring her up, Techno would shut out the conversation and pretend he hadn’t heard him. It wasn’t healthy, and Phil couldn’t blame him because he was still young but he just wished he wouldn’t be so heartbroken to the point of refusing to acknowledge that she ever existed in the first place.

This went on for months. Almost a whole year had passed and the building that contained Y/n’s belongings went untouched. All the delicate keepsakes from past adventures, photos of strangers that neither of the men dared ask about, and the bookshelves lining almost every wall and so full of books from all over the world- it all gathered dust. Until finally she came back.

Phil almost didn’t recognize her at first. The tired weariness evident in the dark circles under her eyes and the dragging of her footsteps, but everything else was the same. The dark hair on her head now long enough to braid- much to his excitement- and the multitudes of runes covering her body, with the additions of quite a few now. One of the newest things though is the several piercings and jewelry that she’s wearing. The most prominent of which is the chain hanging around her neck, a medium-sized precious stone of unknown origin hanging off of it. 

“Y/n…” Phil said, dropping the wood he held in her arms in favor of running over and embracing her.

She hugs him back, the feeling almost foreign to her now. But now that she’s back, she doesn’t intend on forgetting it again.

“Where’s Techno? I need to talk to you both.” Y/n mumbles into Phils' shoulder, and for a minute he feels the cold flush of fear at the thought of her leaving again.

“He’s inside his house. Here, I’ll take you there.” Phil can’t help but feel like he’s showing around a visitor. The community has changed quite a bit since she’d last been there but the dread-filled feeling that he gets at the thought of her leaving again, coming back to say that she’s leaving and never returning, is more than he could take.

“Techno. Where are you?” Phil calls out as he enters the house and the chill of the room makes him shiver.

“Downstairs.” A gruff voice calls back, followed by a grunt of frustration.

“Well, can you come upstairs real quick? We have a visitor.” The word is bitter on his tongue and the look that flashes quickly across Y/n’s face makes him wish he’d chosen a better wording.

“Fine.” The ladder creaks and then Techno is peeking his head through the hole that leads down the basement.

“Y/n. What are you doing here?” It’s not entirely a question, and Y/n winces at Techno’s harsh tone. “Why are you back now? What, was living out there not as good as you thought it was? Well, you can leave. We don’t want you back here. We’re doing just fine on our own.” 

Y/n feels destroyed. She didn’t expect Techno to react positively to her return, but she didn’t expect this.

“Can I just tell you why I left?” She asks, and Techno snorts.

“Sure. Go ahead. Lay on us this wonderful reason.” Techno’s voice drips with sarcasm.

“There were some people I needed to find- had to find.” She says and Techno laughs.

“Really. That’s your reason. You had to go find some people so you left for ten months. You didn’t even think to tell us in person, instead, you just left a note. Hell, you could have taken us with you. We would have happily gone with you. I would have happily gone with you. I’d have done anything for you. But it appears that the feeling wasn’t mutual, since you barely bothered to leave a half-assed note telling us.” Techno shouts, having climbed fully into the room and stood towering over the girl.

“You don’t understand. This was not a trip you could have made. Neither of you would have been able to!” Y/n shouts back. 

Phil backs away, settling into the couch on the other side of the room. 

“What do you mean, I don’t understand. I understand perfectly. You abandoned us. You abandoned me. Well, you know what, I don’t want you back here. You need to leave. Get your things and leave. Right now.” Techno says and it feels like Y/n was just punched in the gut.

“What? Techno you’re not serious?” Phil’s astonished. Of everything he thought Techno would say to Y/n, this wasn’t one of them.

“Yeah, I am. Now get out.” Philza protests and Techno starts yelling at him as he tries to shove her out of the house.

“My clan was killed! I had to find their bodies!” She shouts out over the two men and Techno stops pushing her.

“Clan?” He asks and Phil stares at her blankly.

“You’re a demon?” He asks and Techno looks back and forth between the two.

“Part demon, yes. My clan was killed and I had to find them. I needed to know who was left. And… I’m now the leader of a clan that doesn’t exist anymore. They were all dead.” Her voice breaks at the end of her sentence, and the sorrow overwhelms her. She’d done a good job on the trip there and back of not crying, of ignoring what happened. But saying it out loud makes it real, and something inside her snaps with those words.

Suddenly the runes tattooed on her and the amount of gold jewelry she’s wearing makes sense to Phil. 

“Hey, it’s okay.” Techno pulls her into his arms protectively.

Phil stands from the couch and joins them. The combined warmth of the other two hybrids is almost too much to bear, but Philza hugs them anyways. Y/n’s sobbing continues for a little longer, but soon it turns into muffled sniffles and the shaking of her body calms a little bit.

“It’s up to me now to find a new clan. Custom is that I have to either join one or find others to form one with. I don’t think I’ll be able to stay here. Most of them require you to live with the group.” Y/n whispers as she pulls away from the hug.

“No. I won’t let you leave. Not for a second time.” Techno says stubbornly, and Y/n shakes her head.

“I don’t have a choice.”

“Yes, you do. We’ll be your new clan. Even if you can’t give us the jewelry of your brothers and sisters like tradition dictates, we can still be your clan. Technically your clan doesn’t have to be other demons.” Phil smiles at her. Techno doesn’t know why Phil would know that, but he doesn’t question his knowledge either way. Phil’s lived a long life before he and Y/n came into the picture.

“You guys would do that?” She asks and he nods his head eagerly.

“Of course. We were already really close before- nothing’s going to be changing.”

“Yeah. What do we have to do to join your clan?” Techno asks.

“Well, we basically have to get married to each other. It’s really just an unbreakable promise to stay with each other and protect each other until we die. Soooo… forever. Are you guys sure this is what you want? Because once we do this we can’t go back.” Y/n looks at them in worry.

“Yes. We both want this. You belong here with us. Life was horrible without you here. I had to deal with Phil all alone. The full force of his attention was on me. It was a never-ending nightmare.” Technos voice is dry as he delivers the joke and Y/n laughs as Phil protests.

“Hey. You forget that I was equally as stuck with you. It’s not easy when you live with a piglin who never gets cold and forgets that not everyone is as lucky as him.” Phil says and Techno mimics his words.

“Whatever you say, old man. But Y/n, I’m a hundred percent serious about joining your clan. I never want to let you go again.” Techno says into Y/n’s shoulder.

“Yeah, it was so quiet without you here mate. And cold. So, so cold.” Phil wraps his wings around the two human furnaces and holds them close.

Even though he’s more than two hundred years older than the pair and knows the reality of life- that eventually they’ll get bored of each other or tired and leave- he finds himself wanting to never let go.

“Here, hold out your hands,” Y/n tells them as she pulls out of the hug.

The two men do so without hesitation, and Y/n places a ring in each of their hands. They’re heavy, made of an unknown metal to most who walk the earth and they’re burning hot to the touch as if they were just forged and taken out of the fire.

“But… you’re not supposed to?” Phil says and the woman shakes her head.

“It doesn’t matter if my clan is made of demons or not. I’m still going to give you guys the rings signifying our bonds.” She says and Phil nods.

“Now… who wants to go and slaughter some orphans?” Techno asks, clapping his hands together.

Y/n shouts yes and drops her bag on the ground, running out the door. Techno hangs back a moment, pausing only to look at his reflection in the mirror- at the heavy ring on his tusk. It’s stopped burning and has turned into a comfortable warmth.

“Hey, you good mate?” Phil asks and Techno smiles.

“Never better.” He eyes the half-demon waiting outside in the snow, her tail swishing on the ground behind her. 

“Good. Because now there’s no getting rid of her.” Phil smiles and they join the girl waiting outside, ready for whatever adventures lie ahead.

#dsmp x reader #dsmp techno #technoblade x reader #technoblade x platonic!reader #philza x reader #philza x platonic!reader #hybrid reader #technoblade x hybrid!reader #philza x hybrid!reader #technoblade x y/n #philza x y/n #lizzy writes

[jarofstyles]

ex! harry turning up at y/ns doorstep in the middle of the night telling her that he can’t stop thinking about what they had and even though shes like 🤔😐✋🏻 at first she invites him inside to talk more in depth and he goes „bloody idiot i was..was gon' marry yeh, were gon' be the mum of my babies..wanted everything w' yeh, still do.“ and it basically ends in some passionate intense love making<33

YES YES YES

_______

She bolted.

Harry cursed to himself for pressing down hard at her, knowing that she had been a bit skittish since their breakup. He knew that he would have to handle her with caution but in that moment, his mind slipped back into owning her. She had been his first so long, and even after so many months apart it was his instinct. He wanted her.

He was a stubborn son of a bitch, that was for sure. And while he had at first been a bit hesitant about his want to after her, he knew that it would be foolish of him to not. The connection they had was further proven in those moments he had her backed against that counter, and he knew that no one else would ever be able to make him feel the way she did.

So? Harry swallowed his pride. He decided to say fuck it, and arrived at her place, hands in his pockets as he looked down at his feet. The ride up to her flat and walk down the hallway was so familiar yet felt so raw. He hadn’t been here in so long, a hallway that used to watch their kisses and fumbling with keys and frisky hands up dressed or in pants was how solemn and a bit nerve wracking. He hadn’t ever wanted to let her go and it was his fault for sure. Not being able to delegate his work with his love was his downfall but if anything, the time apart had shown him how incredibly important it was to have someone like Y/N behind him. Her support meant everything.

She meant everything.

His knuckles tapped against the door, stomach turning with nerves. She could very well tell him to fuck off, spit at him, yell. He wasn’t necessarily sure what to expect. The only inkling he had to go off of was knowing she was just as miserable without him, and her body still reacted to touches the way she used to. He had that going for him.

When she opened the door, her heart fell to her stomach. It had been 3 days since the incident, her skin still tingling with the ghost of his touch. She had come home and sobbed. Sobbed and cried and gotten sick because the touch reminded her of everything she lost, all the strides she had thought she made to her over him.. ruined. All by one night. He had too much control over her.

Despite the nerves being raw, she took in his looks. His bags under his eyes, looking a bit pale and the lack of sleep. He had cried. She knew that look anywhere. Stress riddled his body and he almost looked like he was trying to make himself look smaller and less intimidating- which was hard for a 6 foot something tattooed man.

“H-Harry?” She whispered, unsure what to do with this. “What are you doing here?” Her arms crossed against her body protectively, which broke his heart. She shouldn’t have to feel scared of him. He should be making her feel safe and relaxed and open, like he used to.

“We need to talk, Y/N. Actually, I need to say some things and it would be better if I came inside. May I?”

Dumbfounded at the idea of him actually being here, she nodded, letting him in. It hadn’t changed too much. The vanilla suede candle still burned and scented the air. The couch still had a slight dip, the same pet dish for the cat was sat half empty. But their photos were gone,’making his stomach turn.

Fuck. This used to be home. It still felt like it for a bit. But she had erased bits of him that made it shared.

She led him to the living room, sitting on the couch across from him. The middle cushion gave space, making her feel a bit better. Harry was such a complicated thing for her. The source of so, so much joy in her life… but also so much pain. He had broken her heart and left her in pieces and he hadn’t attempted to work things out with her at all. So why now?

“What is it you have to say?” Her tone came off quiet and a bit cold. As if she was annoyed and bored. But it wasn’t the case. Her heart was pounding just as hard as his, clueless as to why he was here. Why he was bothering months too late.

“Don’t…. Lovely…” he swallowed sadly. “I hurt you so badly.” His face fell as he realized this wasn’t her. His girl didnt shy away, she didn’t go cold. She was warm and sweet to him, she was open and receptive and she never looked at him like that. Why he managed to notice so late… he didn’t know.

“Yeah. You did. You hurt me so fucking badly that I thought my heart was breaking. I always thought that maybe you’d come back and tell me what a mistake you’d made. Instead, you up and left. Packed your shit like a complete and utter coward while i was at work.” Her steely expression was laced with hints of pain that he could see through. The words made him flinch. It was true. He was a coward.

“Y/N, I-“

“Shut up.” She snapped, watching his face fall into shock. It really wasn’t the old her. She had been a bit bitter since then. It wasn’t fully his doing, but he was a large contributor. “I had to come home to an empty apartment. No letter. Ni note. No you; and no more of your stuff. The records were gone. You took our fucking records.” Her voice broke. “All your clothing. Not only did my heart feel empty, but the house? And then our fucking cat.” She seethed, standing up. “Our fucking cat meowed for days. Days, Harry. Looking for you. And you never came back. Sat at the god damn door every night at 7, waiting for you to come inside.” Her cold personal broke, the emotion sweeping her face.

His stomach hurt. He didn’t realize it would be this bad. As little as she had even said, he knew he would have to make it up until the end of time. Her hurt was audible and he could even feel it dripping into his own bloodstream.

“Sweetheart…” he stood up, approaching with caution. She didn’t back away, but she didn’t step towards him. “I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry.” His voice broke. “I thought… I was so terrible t’ya, and then y’said you never wanted to see me again…. I thought I was doing what y’wanted.” He whispered pathetically. “I shouldn’t have… I should have fought harder. But we were so miserable, Y/N. I was wrecking you.” His excuse sounded poor even to his own ears, heart dropping as her lip wobbled.

“I just wanted you. I wanted you to talk to Me. To be with me. I didn’t want you to leave. You fucking idiot!” Her voice broke as the tears stung her eyes, but she didn’t push him away when he grabbed her and tugged her into his arms. Pulling her in for a hug, squeezing her tightly as he felt her start to sob. His own tears were quietly burning in his eyes. Seeing the result of his idiocy in person hurt.

“I’m so sorry, so fucking sorry. I thought you’d be happier without me… knew I was being an idiot and wasn’t giving you the right attention. But I thought you’d want to find me when y’wanted me again…” his logic was flawed yet again, and he realized how dumb he sounded when he said it out loud. “The plan was always us. Was Gonna marry ya. Y’were gonna be the mumma to my babies, was gonna be with you forever. It’s all I’ve ever wanted.” He whispered sadly, lips speaking against her hair.

“It’s still all I want. Y/N, angel love…. Please. Know I’ve been so stupid but I can’t do another day without you. I know I hurt you so badly… I’ll never forgive myself f’that. But I’ll spend every single day trying to make it up to you. I want you. I’ve missed you so much it hurts. Please… give me a chance to do what I should have done.” He pleaded, pulling her back to hold her face in his rough palms.

The sincerity dripping through his voice, the tears that had escaped his eyes and the trembling of his hands holding her cheeks let her see that he meant it. He meant it and he wanted to try. Maybe she was the idiot for believing him. But with a love she felt for him, so strongly remaining after all this time apart…. She only had one answer.

“Okay.”

#angst #writing #harry styles one shot #jarofstyles #harry styles fanfic #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles imagine #angst blurb #blurb #blurbs #Harry angst #Harry styles angst