#self indulgent as always

[bnnyteef]

Wip time

#im so normal #self indulgent as always #will finish tomorrow probably #I really gotta get a grip tbh #art #digital art #fanart #clipstudio paint #stardew valley #sdv shane #sdv #sdv fanart #my art #shane #wip #Sketch

[pseudophan]

x

#self indulgent as always #dan and phil #daniel howell #amazingphil #phan #mine #my gif

[tomakehimfreeart]

#rinharu #my art #color #2016 #hugs #self indulgent as always

[peach-tinted]

When things get bad, I find myself thinking of the two roads that diverged in a yellow wood. Of pivotal turning points, and defining moments, and the fork at which lies the road not taken. Inevitably, invariably, I will return here, shovel in hand, ready to go grave digging once again.

The earth is soft here in my garden of tombstones. It is almost begging to be disturbed. I take my time in selecting which one should be exhumed today, slowly running my fingers across each weather-worn marker in this sprawling necropolis of my mind. I am spoiled for choice, after all. There is much to pick from in this lovingly curated collection of my grief.

Perhaps I’ll start recent, weave my way through rows of neatly ordered monoliths until I’m standing at the edge of a bittersweet season of 21sts, the denouement of a now-closed chapter of my young adulthood. It is a covetable bildungsroman story of self discovery and friendship and growth. It is filled with an ensemble cast of characters no longer in my life, of whom I only have memories left of.

I sink my spade into the soil and unearth the scent of salt water and candlelit dnms and cheap vodka and expensive coffee with 50 second microwave-warmed milk. Suddenly, I am once again in the din of your 21st party. Transported to a small warehouse space dimly lit with fairy lights and the warmth of your closest one hundred friends.

In our timeline, I had looked around and wondered if you’d even spoken more than three sentences to half of the people in the room. In this one, I am too nervous to form conscious thought. Cheeks warm from a shot for courage and fingers preoccupied with periodically folding and unfolding a sheet of paper from my clutch, I know it’s coming but my heart still leaps into my throat when you draw the crowd’s attention for speeches with a tap on the microphone.

In my memory, they were a sweet, unending slew of sentimentality that I watched bittersweetly from within the heart of the crowd. Here, I am barely able to process the jokes and endearing anecdotes, too focused on silently practicing the well-rehearsed speech ironed into my memory as I wait my turn.

I probably miss my cue when you call me up. Perhaps my closer friends will laugh encouragingly from within the crowd and cheer me on as I walk forwards unsurely to address your guests. I know the words by heart, but nervous habit will have me glancing down to the paper between my hands as I deliver them anyway. It’s a speech undeserving of any award, but it’s genuine and heartfelt. Later, people I barely know will laugh, not unkindly, about my shaking hands and the nervous tremor in my voice.

There are jokes I wanted to include but ultimately axed out of fear of them falling flat and landing in a room of devastating awkward silence. I tell them to you after, though, from the comfort of your bedroom floor, and you’ll laugh and lament that I should have included them anyway. In any case, it was a good speech, you’ll reassure me, even though it was likely mediocre at best. We fall asleep late into the nights with our hearts full and eyelids drooping. I wrap myself tight in borrowed covers and the warmth of your company before being pulled under. A final thought takes form before I sink into slumber: a fleeting recognition that I know I will miss this moment when I look at back at it in the future.

I’m filled with yearning when I wake, crouched above this freshly overturned grave. I exhale the lingering scent of summer from my lungs and shift to systematically rebury its corpse. The motions are smooth, practiced; it is evident that this is not the first time that the dead have been disturbed. To think that it won’t happen again in the future would be naively optimistic. For now, sated, I’ll take my leave. I do not look back as I go for I know that my cemetery of what ifs will be here when I next decide to visit.

in my defence I have none / for digging up the grave another time - the 1, taylor swift 

You can also find this piece on my substack :) More to come soon <3 

#writeblr #taylor swift #the 1 #robert frost #the road not taken #writersociety #writers on tumblr #literature #i write sometimes #prose #self indulgent as always

[kurolumiis]

might write a drabble/oneshot of dazai helping u through a rough patch

#[☆] messages from the galaxy #self indulgent as always #im not doing the best rn </3 #my rooms a mess #and it took me a week to clean my kitchen

[mienar]

small town buzz

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#artists on tumblr #animated illustration #illustration #backgrounds #animated gifs #cozy rooms #background illustration #animation #myillust #hellooo! just wanted to share this artwork i made! this is totally fresh from the oven phew #ive always adored the idea of living/being in a low-density flat in a small town #it's such a niche thing LOL but i think about it a lot kfnjdndf #this is really more of a self-indulgent artwork i suppose #anyways!! i do hope you'll like it! :3 and i hope you'll have a lovely day/night ahead!

[welcometogrouchland]

[ID in ALT] I've made posts before about Talia/Dick co-parenting Damian moments (will never happen but let me dream) and this came to me in a vision. Took me ages to finish for some reason 😭 and then even longer to post

#dc comics #dc #damian wayne #dick grayson #talia al ghul #batfamily #dc robin #nightwing #anyway. yes im a self-indulgent ''dick as damians secret third parent'' truther #like i DO think it's way more complex and nuanced than the schmoopy affectionate fan portrayal of it #they're brothers they're father and son they're partners they're the dynamic duo except only in past tense etc etc #but consider! I'm not immune to schmoopy affection in fanworks. it compells me despite itself #anyway it's technically not that crazy when it comes to dick and damian. they hug! often! at least they did #it's not as big a leap to these types of scenarios #also talia ''somewhat absent for complex reasons on both her and damians part but very loving and loved by her son'' al ghul #you will always be famous to me #son of the demon origin...bwahhh #anyway. someone made a comic kind of like this/like a post i made abt this topic #but way funnier bc dick and talia starting trying to beat each other up #so go look at that as well #anyway. it's been a somewhat difficult few weeks so I'm. desperately trying to take it easy #i got some reading with me (first vol of kevin smiths GA run that i found second hand and jaimes BB run vol 2!) #so we'll see how far i get through those. considering there's demons in my head telling me to re-read things (LET ME OUT!!!) #when i finish GA and BB i do plan on rereading robin 2021. as a treat to myself #it's a run I've really warmed up to as time went on #I'm keeping up w/ the current b&r run even though it is. admittedly very slow w/ some weird dialogue #i read it for the damian content more than anything. also nikas back so that's neat :] #idk I have a feeling that after absolute power shakes out we might get some more creative team switch ups #so if anyone at dc is interested in taking over the reigns on b&r...that could be very neat #(it's me they should hire me. please DC i have ideas listen to my red hood pitch PLEASE-)

[chaoparty]

i always had a huge crush on sophie the swamp witch from neopets...

#neopets #sophie the swamp witch #neotag #our art #ive ALWAYS wanted to draw her really really pretty so last night that's what i did! #and a very slight redesign #changed her top into more of a cape/shawl #changed her skirt a lil #gave her a pendant blah blah #i'm so happy 🥺 completely self indulgent art moment #plushpon #art

[qiinamii]

You gave Xiao your heart.

He thought it was a spar invite.

[Next]

#qiiarts #xiao #lumine #frisk #the art i got too self indulgent about that undertale always has a special place in my heart #also me thinking wouldnt it be interesting to use the flirt route not as frisk #and my fondness to xiao and traveler in particular at this point in time then bam this comic #they're close friends at best with how i see their r/s but putting the tag just in case #xiaolumi #i wasnt sure to upload this at first cus theres a second part and then over time i had figured out a full narrative #soon enough in the future ill do it :3 yes this is a tiny for-fun crossover series incoming #just these two failing horribly at expressing Interest #genshin impact #undertale

[macdenlover]

gender bent always sunny gang because i can’t get them out of my head

(heavily inspired by @bananabirch’s designs <3 major credz to them)

#iasip #my art #it's always sunny #i took mac in an incredibly self indulgent direction. #genderbent sunny

[jabesa0]

💫Pillow talk💫

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obm #obey me mammon #mammon obey me #obm mammon #mammon #obey me fanart #this mammmon….is so self indulgent… #I always associate mammon w/ cinnamoroll #so I had to give him the pj pants #he’s so babygirl #I’m frothing at the mouth and running at him on all fours #I needed to draw him like this #this was for mee #my double dollar Angel is so cute #I let him do whatever he wants idc

[localapparently]

dokjoong for the soul

#self indulgent kdj of mine is that he is always a bit crazy abt how cute yjh can be #dokjoong #orv #omniscient readers viewpoint #omniscient reader #omniscient reader fanart #orv fanart #kim dokja #kdj #yoo joonghyuk #yjh

[inkz123]

Happy bday to my beloved qwq💕 (Error is owned by @loverofpiggies)

#fanart #doodles #error sans #undernovela error #mayhaps #i love party sombreros sm #and frilly dress shirts r always 👌👌👌 #this is mostly self indulgent #was gonna draw something more birthday-y and wholesome #but #BUT THE DEMONS WONNN #THEY WONN😭😭😭

[hajihiko]

Bodyguard and Bossman

#Hajime hinata #Fuyuhiko kuzuryu #Sdr2 #Super danganronpa 2 #Danganronpa 2 #Danganronpa #Kuzuhina #Idk lol. Bodyguard Aus of any kind are just always fun #Idk if I'll be happy w this later but I'm living in the now #Someone tell Fuyuhiko nonone wears a hat and a coat to the club #Someones ass is NOT even attempting eye contact in this picture #An art #I am not immune to self indulgence. Far from it. So indulgent #Dont look at the anatomy at all I hate it the more I look

[alwaysshallow]

simon "i don't want kids" riley, but then he sees you with your cousin and is obsessed with the idea of giving you a baby. so. he fucks you, leaving no pole to discussion; you two gonna have a kid. a house with white fence. he's gonna even try to make a garden in the back, small greenhouse just for you to take care of.

ohhh and don't mention how obsessed he'd be with making a playground:/

#sorry ill always believe in his breeding kink #like #not maybe in MANY versions but i feel simon would sometimes propose on the first date. and a happy life is a dream #and this is very self indulgent so LMOANDKSNS

[ftcatv]

i just wanted to draw him like, all fancy and shit *sniff*

#nick valentine #fallout 4 #fo4 #fallout 4 fanart #im giving up on hats fr #theyre always OFF #self indulgent because im so obsessed these days #with him #of course #e e e e e #cw cigarettes #ftcat ftcating