#so he lets it be himself

[turtleblogatlast]

I think about Leo’s “I’m your least favorite” comment to Splinter in “Down with the Sickness” a lot. It’s likely just a throwaway comment, a way to get Splinter to leave him alone before Leo gets sick too, but I can’t help but wonder if Leo believes it on some level.

Obviously it’s not true, Splinter loves him as much as he loves the others, but…it wouldn’t be shocking if Leo believed otherwise. After all, just in “Many Unhappy Returns” alone, Splinter has, with no hesitation, said comments like “my other sons would have taken this seriously” and “I knew I should’ve brought purple”, said “no” to Leo’s “I love you”, and pretty blatantly didn’t extend any trust in Leo’s plan even after Leo was fairly effortlessly defeating their opponents.

It was only after, when they’d already won, that Splinter finally gives him a “it was all you my son!” And…that’s basically it. Raph is the one who announces his trust in Leo. Not their father, even though Splinter is the one to witness Leo lowering his walls for once (which Splinter doesn’t react well too, because Leo only lowers his walls in the most hectic of times, and because he lowers them only then, either no one is around or no one is in the right state of mind to respond properly, leading to Leo building his walls back up, and the cycle continues.)

Again, it’s not because Splinter doesn’t love Leo, but Leo…can’t be feeling too good about all that. The way he never reacted surprised about any of Splinter’s words too…

He may know that Splinter loves them all, as a group, but individually…I don’t think Leo believes he ranks all that high with that love. Gives another meaning to “I’m nothing without my brothers” huh?

(Of course, I’m willing to bet the invasion changed that understanding, but with that comes the potential misunderstanding that his father’s outright love is tied to Leo sacrificing himself.)

#rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt leo #rise leo #rottmnt headcanons #again OBVIOUSLY SPLINTER LOVES HIM DEARLY #but I wouldn’t blame Leo for thinking he’s loved the LEAST #Splinter also blatantly thinking Donnie is funnier doesn’t help #Leo being a Leo and thus being a Daddy’s Boy at his core doesn’t help #man splinter if you tell Leo he was the first one you held he’d be riding that high for MONTHS #but yeah I just think that with all of Leo’s insecurities…this all isn’t all that unlikely a conclusion to make #and I’ve said it before but…Leo and Splinter don’t really have a softer moment between them unlike the others #that must sting #this isn’t to say that Splinter was WRONG in being upset with Leo in Many Unhappy Returns #because Splinter had no way of knowing Leo’s plan would work out #but again - Leo has to be so confident and cocky because goddangit SOMEONE has to believe in him #so he lets it be himself #hell even the hug that comes after they incapacitate the shredder was more of a ‘Leo was there but it’s to all of them’ #I want them to have a good father son talk so bad #is it any wonder why Leo imprints so quick on Hueso #when the man sees him break and decides to help? #can you imagine how much that means to someone like Leo #that someone with all the reason in the world to leave Leo to deal with things alone #chooses not only to help him but to actively protect him after as well #I bet with Splinter there’s always a voice in the back of his head #that says his dad’s love of him is more obligation than anything #and if they didn’t have that DNA connection it wouldn’t be there #so Hueso having no connection but still sticking by Leo’s side in Leo’s moment of weakness…it probably means a lot #it’s a shame we didn’t truly get that with Splinter and Leo #now I want Hueso and Splinter to meet bc like…they’re both dads! and it’d be interesting

[talaricula]

Things I've seen tumblr memeing about James Somerton doing à la "How did no one see how bigoted he was!" as if those things haven't been a significant part of tumblr culture for over a decade :

Presenting untrue and bordering on conspiratorial versions of (queer or otherwise marginalised) history without any sources

Completely disregarding and disrespecting any expertise on socio-cultural topics/humanities and distrusting academics and historians (incl. acting as if no academics or historians could be queer or marginalised)

Downplaying the role misogyny played in the historical oppression of queer women and concluding that queer men must have been more oppressed than queer women

Bi women are, at best, not as queer as "real" queer ppl, and at worst, simply equivalent to straight women

Despite nominal trans inclusivity, transmasculine ppl are functionally women when convenient (combined with the above, bi transmascs are functionally straight women)

Despite nominal trans inclusivity (bis), shamelessly attacking, threatening and actively endangering any trans woman who questions them or smth they find important (often by unfairly presenting her as violent or as a threat)

Having absolutely fucking wild and reductive takes about ace ppl, the oppression they face and their place in the queer community

Stating that marriage equality is an assimilationist fight while completely ignoring its direct roots in the horrifying consequences of the AIDS crisis for partners of ppl who died of AIDS

Praising western media creators from the past for queer coding even under censure and in the same breath condemning current non western media creators for being homophobic bc their representation isn't explicit enough

Blaming China for all existing homophobic censoring in western media

Assuming all queer media would be better told by western creators and by western standards

Only out queer ppl get to tell queer stories

Heavily criticising almost all queer media created by women or ppl they see as such (see above points about trans ppl) or involving/starring a significant amount of women for any perceived or real amount of "problematicness", but fawning over and praising and negating criticism of queer media created by and starring mostly or even functionally exclusively men (even when it could be argued that, you know, not involving/seriously sidelining women is a pretty clear example of misogyny which should probably be considered "problematic")

And I'm probably forgetting stuff or there's stuff I have internalised myself and don't recognise as an issue

Like idk but I feel like the takeaway from Hbomberguy and Toddintheshadow's videos should maybe be "be aware of such patterns in your communities bc they definitely exist" and not "this guy is uniquely awful" and I feel like a lot of the discussion I've seen surrounding this has been severely failing at that. Most ppl who've spent any significant amount of time on tumblr prob either have internalised at least one of those thought patterns, have had to de-internalise them, or have had to be extremely vigilant to not internalise them (which is done by, you know, seeking out other sources, which also seemed like an important takeaway from the videos)

#Also I'm saying this as someone who actually watched quite a few of Somerton's videos #And noticed those patterns and stopped watching bc I recognised them from here #and had already learned to unlearn them after being so exposed to them here #And tbh I think anyone who hasn't had the luck or made the conscious choice to seek out ppl who pushed against those narratives #Would absolutely have fallen for this man's bullshit. Like let's not kid ourselves we see takes like this every day on this hellsite #2014 me would have. For sure. #This is next to the plagiarism issue which as Harris points out is an Internet wide issue and this includes tumblr #James Somerton #hbomberguy #todd in the shadows #This brought to you by a conversation with my wife yesterday #So many ppl on here don't deserve to meme or be this self absolvingly critical of this man #The call is coming from inside the house #The man has a tumblr it would legit not surprise me if some of the things he supposedly made up himself he did actually get from somewhere #And that somewhere was a tumblr post

[watchingwisteria]

listen there really was just something about how in the book, snow’s 3-page descent from hesitant lover boy to deluded psychopath happens entirely in his mind. lucy gray gives him no indication whatsoever that she suspects him, that she’s going to leave or betray him. he’s just sitting quietly in the cabin waiting for her to return when that seed of calculated suspicion, which he has needed to survive the capitol, takes a hold of him and chokes the life out of any goodness left inside him. it really drives home your terror as a reader that “oh my god did he kill her? did she escape? what happened to her? why would he even think that?” in a way that when the movie had to adjust for visualization it lost some of that holy shit this guy has lost it emphasis.

#seeing some discourse and im not saying lucy grey didnt know #im saying she never dropped the kind of hints that she knew like she did in the movie #or if she did snow isnt worried about them until he very suddenly is consumed by them #snow is not concerned about whether or not she believed him. of course she did! hes snow! #but then shes gone…. for a while…… #and its the sudden immediate drastic unravelling that comes across so clearly in the book #that i knew wouldn’t translate to screen yet still cant help but miss #the hunger games #coriolanus snow #tbosas #lucy gray baird #not a crime or anything just a note that i cannot stop thinking about #the ballad of songbirds and snakes #this is all from memory of reading it quite a while ago. so maybe 3 pages is an exaggeration #but i remember it happening VERY quickly and without much external cause #like we as the reader have no indication as to whether shes nearby or not. #snow has no idea either. he just SUSPECTS. and his suspicion breeds the hatred that has been bubbling inside him all this time #he hates how she undoes him. he hates that he WOULD run away with her if shed let him keep his secrets #and he HATES more than anything that she makes him WANT to tell his secrets #he wants to be vulnerable and reveal the ugly nasty parts about himself and still be loved #but he does not let himself and it is everyone’s downfall #he chooses cruelty bc it is easy and familiar and makes him feel more powerful than the vulnerable give and take that real love requires

[bishy437]

he won

bonus:

#oi oi don’t steal my tags i see u 🫵 #svsss #mdzs #moshang #hualian #bingqiu #sqq u spoilt brat #binghe is def the best cook out of the three gongs i’m not saying this lightly #we know lwj can cook from the extras and i can only assume hc can cook bc the only thing he CANT do is write BUT: #xl enjoys cooking so ofc hc is gonna let him express himself culinarily #and wwx is a spice fanatic weirdo who wants to go live his m!lf dreams into the sunset #lwj will not get in the way of that #sqq however is perfectly content having bingmei cook his meals forever and never stepping into a kitchen #scum villian self saving system #scum villain #mo dao zu shi #tgcf #heaven official's blessing #wangxian #mine #luo binghe #shen qingqiu #wei wuxian #lan wangji #xie lian #hua cheng #shang qinghua #mobei jun

[wu-does-art]

coming out as a "Will snores obnoxiously loud" and "Nico breaths so quietly you can barely tell hes alive" truther

#LISTEN OKAY. WILL WORKS CRAZY HOURS. EXHAUSTS HIMSELF PHYSICALLY AND EMOTIONALLY #hes going to snore. really loud. as soon as he hits the pillow. #its not uncommon for even people who dont snore! that i know anyways. #happened to family members of mine who dont usually snore #also additionally nico sleeps like a corpse so it works out for both of them #i think personally nico is usually like 3/4's awake but once his body actually lets him rest? out. gone. #sleep deprived x also sleep deprived for different reasons #also on a different note (slightly) i feel like will just grabs nico sometime in the middle of the night like hes his teddy bear #nico is lets himself get dragged into wills arms because he too. is completely and utterly asleep #solangelo #nico di angelo #will solace #the sun and the star #rrverse #percy jackon and the olympians #percy jackson and the olympians #pjo

[frownyalfred]

Clark: why are you like this

Bruce, three seconds away from dropping a glass of champagne on the floor, dramatically slipping in the pieces, and falling into the lap of the senator they’re trying to get information out of in a bizarre, sleep-deprived, but likely wildly successful seduction attempt: can you just let me have this please

#he’s tired ok #he has to be serious ALL the time #let him have fun #seriously though if he’s so good at manipulating people but he keeps a tight leash on himself #Brucie is his stress relief #bruce wayne #batman #dc #superbat #clark kent #superman #also he’s a Scorpio

[egophiliac]

don't think I'm not still deep in the episode 7 brainrot. because OH BOY AM I

(also one more extremely, obnoxiously self-referential thing, I'm -- I'm so sorry)

#art #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland episode 7 part 7 spoilers #twisted wonderland book 7 #twisted wonderland book 7 part 7 spoilers #and so ends the saga #(this time for real i promise) #malleus post-episode 7: shroud...i should have heeded your warnings...now tell me more about how i may hunt this elusive 'snipe' #alas poor puppies :( i'm glad they had a little aside about how they can fix them after this whole mess #let ortho have his dogs! #man i love that this has come down to malleus vs technology though #MY FAVORITE #ortho: you can destroy the shell that links me to this mortal world...but can you select the CORRECT DOWNLOAD LINK??? #malleus: (downloads a billion viruses and dies instantly) #also i'm probably the only one who thinks idia complaining about his own mental tartarus prison is funny #but there we go #idia has two modes and two modes only #he's either in the middle of a metaphor where he finally forgives himself for his brother's death and takes charge of his own destiny #or he's like 'fuck yeah i'm about to get isekai'd into the internet! (immediately falls over making dying whale sounds)' #wait no he has a third mode: actively suffocating because silver and sebek won't stop squishing him #look he's just delightful no matter what's going on okay

[ahhrenata]

Steve tries to stay quiet while he gets ready for work, but Eddie hears him. He keeps his eyes closed and just listens- to Steve grumbling to himself when his hair doesn’t sit quite right, who starts to hum and whisper some catchy song. Eddie turns his sleepy gaze onto Steve as he shuffles around their room- watching quietly as he slips on his clothes, his shoes, a simple chain with Eddie’s ring around his neck. A warm, affectionate smile breaks across his face. Before he leaves, Steve glances at what he expects to be a sleeping Eddie, but instead, he’s met with a rasped, ‘Hey.’ Eddie sits himself up, stretches his arm across Steve’s side of the bed, and reaches, fingers wiggling. Steve crosses the room to cradle his face.

Their foreheads press, noses bump, and Steve brushes his fingers across scars and dimples.

He breathes a quiet,

‘Sorry, I didn’t mean to wake you.’

Eddie huffs a tired laugh,

‘You know I never mind.’

Because, yeah.

Every morning Steve tries to stay quiet while he gets ready for work, but Eddie always hears him.

( another one from the poll | WIP )

#in my feels this fine morning #eddie cant let steve go without his goodbye smooch #i imagine eddie would sleep through anything #but i also like to think he lets himself wake up #he likes to watch Steve’s morning routine #which may or may not include winking at himself in the mirror when his final once over checks out #steddie #steddie fanart #steve harrington #eddie munson #stranger things #i changed Steve’s face from the WIP.. it needed better angling #I’m not a writer so please ignore grammar and whatever other problems lol #i type like i read it in my head #so hopefully it sounds alright

[aunmenosheteroenespanol]

2.12 Chimney Begins - 2.09 Hen Begins - 2.16 Bobby Begins Again - 7.04 Buck, Bothered and Bewildered

Tommy's family arc

#911 #911edit #911 abc #911 show #911 spoilers #911 season 7 #tommy kinard #evan buckley #evan 'buck' buckley #kinley #bucktommy #kinkley #tevan #pick a ship name you guys and thanks for picking tevan the most correct name #anyway analysis time! #looking back with Modern Knowledge tm about why tommy acts the way he does in the past... babygirl you were so closeted I'm so proud #babygirl was back there getting into narnia #he was so resistant to letting go of the pseudo-family he'd found at the 118 in chimney begins #even tho it was a good old boys club that he knew he really didn't fit into he was making himself fit because at least it was something #but then he let chimney in and then hen came around and he saw a very queer person being openly queer and not giving a fuck what they think #and I think his behavior in that episode was trying to support hen as much as he could without outing himself #because like. how do you give up years of relative safety with people who do care about you they just won't like you anymore if you're *you #then he meets buck in s7 which is like 10-20 years later timeline is fake and he's like oh. this is what unconditional family is #and he's like oh. maybe I can come back. maybe I can be part of this again somehow. maybe we've both grown enough #or at the very least he'll be close to something he never believed would really happen for him #rant over tevan my beloved tim minear pillow cold both sides god bless #my edits

[twinstxrs]

idk if this is accurate but i’ve felt like in previous seasons riz & gorgug have been one of the inter-bad kids dynamics we’ve seen the least of & this season has been so great in that aspect. gorgug having helped make some of riz’s magic gear. riz helping gorgug with his studies. the shared birthday party. gorgug’s gift to riz being something he himself made to protect riz. riz’s gift to gorgug being something he illegally grabbed to protect gorgug. gorgug who utilizes rage to put his body on the line for his friends & riz who will take deep levels of mental stress for his friends. even though it was within the context of a joke, riz calling gorgug an “absolute sweetie.” like yea they might not be in a band together or both part of a presidential campaign team or owlbears teammates, but they’d go to war for each other, because they’re best friends.

#riz gukgak #gorgug thistlespring #fantasy high #dimension 20 #fantasy high junior year #fhjy #fhjy spoilers #these kids are all so self-sacrificing but i do think riz gorgug are the most clear (& juxtaposed) self-sacrificers #riz will mentally tear himself to pieces and get lost in cases and take on ungodly levels of stress for those he loves #gorgug will use himself as a human shield. he will take hit after hit if it means his friends are okay. #and they’d both do the other thing too. riz would let himself get hit for gorgug. gorgug would pull all nighters & take stress for riz. #even if mechanically they can’t or it wouldn’t make sense. they would if they could. #also #the starstruck barry mechanic of being a guard is so gorgug. it’s soooo gorgug like that’s literally him #anyways love this tall green guy & this short green guy so much #especially because gorgug is tall & considered intimidating but protective in a deeply kind way #while riz is short & underestimated but protective in a deeply vicious way (affectionate) #i hope this makes sense but i think riz is primarily ‘i would kill for you’ & gorgug is primarily ‘i would die for you’ maybe #this does not mean gorgug would not kill for riz or riz would not die for gorgug. they both would. #but those are the primary ways their love manifests due to the nature of their strengths/personalities. To Me #idk this is all just me saying stuff when i should be sleeping 😭 #sorry if i missed a riz gorgug moment in the main post btw i’m tired

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Good Morning, World.

[First] Prev <–-> Next

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #wei wuxian #jiang yanli #jiang cheng #'Good Morning World' because to wwx the jiang household is what grounds him. It is his burrow and blanket. #The familiar soup and banter is his home. The familiar arguments and tension are also his home. #Notice how quickly he throws LWJ to the side once he has JC back in reach! 'He was so boring; I wish *you* were there!' #WWX is very quick to constantly remind himself that he fits within a very specific power structure and role. #He pushes boundaries but almost always only the boundaries that he knows he can push against. #Sitting here now and realizing that if WWX did take life more seriously and act more diligent he would totally usurp JC. #Because the contrast with Them (tm) is wwx is the one that gets in trouble and JC is the one that sticks to the rules. #That responsible appearance especially in contrast is the thin line that holds JC's self-esteem together. #And lets be fully honest. From JC's perspective the last week was also extremely intense and stressful. #It truly was a feat to travel so far so fast despite also being exhausted. Never knowing if it is all in vain. #JC said with his actions 'I would move mountains for you and dig through stone with my bare hands if it meant reaching you.' #and WWX said '[read]' #It's about wwx chronically asking 'why would someone care for me? I'm always tool to be used' than accepting that people love him.

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

i have a Scene - a Plot if you will - that backs this as context. y'all are gonna have to trust me on this one <3 or read the tags...

#the song is 'in your eyes' by peter gabriel #boombox serenade lets GO!!! #in my mind immediately after this the others came over to say hi (or in sallys case tell him off) #and at first howdy's like 'oh ofc wallys there that makes sense. sally too? strange but alright' #then eddie appears and ohhhh boy its Jealousy Central Babey and howdy's train just pulled into the station #scribble salad #laughingstock #welcome home #barnaby x howdy #howdy x barnaby #OK CONTEXT I PROMISED CONTEXT #so in my mind howdy is an oblivious dumbass when it comes to his own romantic feelings. #he's so in love with barnaby (its very obvious) but Doesnt Realize It. despite being a god tier flirty fruity motherfucker #so when barnaby - thinking theyre on the same page - confesses #howdy's all like 'ohhh um. gee barn im flattered truly but - i just dont like you like that' #yk breaking barnaby's heart right down the middle #so barnaby shuts himself in his home and wally is hovering. yk Worried #and eddie - who's been helping barnaby come to terms w/ his own feelings & gauge if howdy feels the same - asks sally to check in for him #& sally goes over and Immediately involves herself. she takes personal offense on barnaby's behalf #also she lives for the drama and wants every juice detail Hot Off The Press #so while howdy is having a lil crisis as he slowly realizes Oh My Fucking God I DO Love Barnaby Like That- #barnaby / sally / wally / (eventually) eddie are all having a sleepover where they just play card games and chat #a good ol bitch n' stitch night #and howdy shows up to try and talk to barns (obvs in my head he doesnt have a boombox he just Knocks) #only to get RE-RE-RE-REJECTEDDDDDD!!!! thats how it feels you wormy mf! #bc barnaby is a) having a girls night & b) needs to emotionally prepare for That conversation #aaaaand THATS the context <3

[stromer]

go to the box, please. GO to the box, please! NOW!

#was quinn hughes silent (he wasn’t) or was he SILENCED??? #the way he's so fawking annoying about it i can't stop laughingggajskdkjkjs i just Know he was tweakingggggg more than he let on #i kinda love u bad girl #its important to note that rick had himself a little smile on the bench at his captain having a toddler-esque meltdown over going to thebox #quinn hughes #canucks lb

[turtleblogatlast]

Imagine little Leo having trouble sleeping so he ends up watching tv and movies with Splinter to pass the time. Splinter often just passes out in his chair, but Leo likes the company anyway.

One day, Leo’s rifling through the movies his dad brought back for them (usually 70s and 80s stuff - Splinter has a bias) and he gasps.

Leo runs over to Splinter and holds up a copy of The Last Unicorn, begging that they watch it that night.

Splinter remembers absolutely nothing about the movie, but hey it’s got a unicorn and it’s animated so it’s gotta be fine, right? So he turns the movie on and passes out near immediately.

He’s woken up roughly an hour and a half later by Leo climbing up onto his chair and sobbing hysterically into his chest.

The movie is now one of Leo’s favorites.

#rottmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #rottmnt leo #rottmnt headcanons #rottmnt splinter #Leo: you wouldn’t let ME leave would you? #Splinter: no of course not my son! #but it was never a matter of letting by those left #rather it is a choice by those leaving #it’s one of the many moments that flashes through Splinters mind when he hears his boy sacrifice himself #anyway leo loves unicorns so obviously he gets to be emotionally devastated and terrified by the last unicorn like the rest of us #he considers forcing his brothers through the same emotional turmoil he went through #but he hides the movie instead #wanting it to be something just for him #man this really hits harder for all those ‘future leo lives’ AUs huh

[chitinleg]

got him off-balance!

#my art #ds9 #star trek deep space nine #julian bashir #elim garak #garashir #watercolor #image desc in alt text #i normally post on mondays but. today im breaking my pattern! getting a little silly. getting a little wild. garashir jumpscare #“tumblr user chitinleg garak would neot easily let himself be swooped off his feet into a hug like that” yes i know BUT! #look at his expression. look at how his arms r pinned. he didnt let this happen LMAO julian just surprised him. grabby huggy human behavior #if you look really closely you can see the tiniest frown in the world on Garak's face. because he's like “EEP !” #cant see bashirs face at all in this only his body but i think we can all imagine that whatevers going thru his head. he needs this hug bad #ALSO. for anyone wondering what the fucked up shadow is that starts at the juncture of the teal sleeve-cap where its set into the armhole #the jumpsuits have a bit of a fold of extra fabric (called an Action Pleat) there which allows for a little more maneuverability of the bod #AND creates a really sleek and flat back panel #because you can see the fabric twists along the side arent grabbing the flat back fabric theyre grabbing the fabric folded beneath it #often times i think about drawing out a dissection of kiras first uniform and this voy era one for other artists to use. bc god knows #i struggled at first to find full body references #they like to shoot ds9 very close to peoples heads. and the camera is so blurry. they smeared butter on that thing. god bless

[wu-does-art]

thinking about Nico adjusting to letting himself miss and long for the people he loves. based on these bits from the sun and the star:

" As Nico and Will followed the trogs, he thought about how much he missed Hazel. He was learning to make peace with that feeling. It was okay for him to miss people because that meant he wanted them around in his life. That idea was *very* new for him- he was used to either pushing people away or watching them recoil from his presence." *

" That was the most surreal thing of all... Was he happy? Nico wasn't very familiar with the sensation, but he couldn't deny that he felt wonderful in Will's presence. He even longed for the son of Apollo when they were apart. A funny thing had happened as the two grew closer: Nico suddenly understood all those cheesy, sappy love songs he'd always hated."

#its just. i like that they included that in the book yk. the fact that he prepared a certain distance between everyone #and thus isnt used to missing anyone #so its strange for him #this is probably set somewhere pre tsats just because i like to think it was one of the times he found himself missing and longing. #but it was one of the first times he actually allowed himself to feel that way. #took the feeling and held it instead of banishing it away #also yes letting himself unmask a bit #i like to think he just gets wayyy more expressive with his hands the more he heals #that and he unmasks more!!! more openly stimming!! more special interest rambles!! #just oughh. #anyways this was a huge comic to colour #big fuck you to tumblr who made posting soooo much harder #fuck u and ur updates tumblr #solangelo #pjo #percy jackson and the olympians #percy jackon and the olympians #nico di angelo #will solace #the sun and the star #trials of apollo #they borrow clothes from eachother its real in my head okay #nico canonally bought will a stupid shirt as a joke tho and i love that for them