#that's a bad example?

[so-you-read-the-usernames]

Female characters who are the sole voice of reason <<<<<<< Female characters who think of themselves as the sole voice of reason but who are actually just as insane as those around them

#meryl stryfe #trigun meryl #trigun #trigun (1998) #I haven’t actually seen tristamp #but based on the gif sets and clips I’ve seen I think it’s still accurate #weiss schnee #yeah I’m a rwby fan so what #there are probably more examples but modern media is sooo bad at writing female characters that I can’t think of any #also old time media #all media is bad at writing female characters #anywho if anyone reblogs this can they put their fav insane lady blorbo in the tags

[ot3]

i love the artistic stylings of studio ghibli as much as anyone else does but im kind of sick of anything with like vivid environments and big blue skies being branded as ghibliesque. because its like. you know where else you can hypothetically find some vivid environments with big blue skies? my friend the great and wonderful outdoors are here for you

#in general just assuming all media is drawing from The Most Popular Example Of A Thing #rather than being like hey maybe both these things took inspiration from the same parts of our world #just feels kind of unfair and reductive a lot of the time #not to say its bad when something IS inspired by ghibli but its kind of the professional version of being asked 'wow is that anime'

[escapistcatontheinternet]

i love the extras of dungeon meshi in how it fleshes out the world because they make it so much more evident how race affects every part of the story while avoiding the zootopia racism problem. like obv a main theme of the story is like, humanity and desire, 'to eat is to live', etc, but since the majority of it takes place in the dungeon isolated from society and thru the lens of laios, the racial aspects play out more like shadows on a wall for most of the story.

then in the extras we get comics like this

which at a glance fleshes out the racial aspects via a character explaining the racial rules of universe - humans have x amount of bones, while orcs and kobolds have more. however, if u take it less straightforwardly, it points out how the concept of 'human' is a constructed concept in the world. the fact that there are different categories of human in different parts of the world based off of what types of humanoids occur there is already a demonstration of this. in response, the bones explanation seems to kabru and the characters as an objective way of measuring humans vs nonhumans.

but obv, when the culture was deciding what humanoids were humans and nonhumans, they weren't blindly analyzing skeletons and then deciding. just visually, one can glean that orcs and kobolds look less like the ingroup of tallmen, elves, dwarves, gnomes, etc. the bones explanation appears as a justification for that immediate prejudice under a scientific guise - I'm sure that one could come up with the same number of physical differences between a gnome and an elf that they would find between a tallman and an orc. it sounds a lot better to say 'well, an orc has 230 bones while a human has 206' then 'well, an orc looks ewwww yucky yucky to me while a human looks normal'.

and what i like abt the comic is that the characters take the explanation at face value for the most part. when a contradiction is brought up in the oni, kabru can neatly slot them into the predetermined number of bones framework. bc that's kinda how it works irl - there r cultural prejudices that we can posthumously justify, and if we find something outside of it, we can twist it to fit into our predetermined binary. however, since the reader does not live in a world where there are orcs and kobolds to be prejudiced against, we can see that flaw in the cultural logic. when the party encounters the orcs, the number of bones has no bearing on their humanity. They r shown to be cliquish and distrusting of outsiders, but not any more than the elves are later in the story.

tldr dungeon meshi worldbuilding is so good

#just me #dungeon meshi #kabru #there r 10000000 examples of how fantasy racism affects the story of dungeon meshi not brought up in the main story #like namaris backstory and chilchucks union and the oni #augh. tasty manga #girls when themes of social isolation #ppl talk Abt the neurodivergent rep/allegory #the racial allegories aren't half bad either #social isolation guys social isolation

[andthebeanstalk]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need. #the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist. #the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28! #a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents. #they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong. #and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives. #you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead? #or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of. #no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow. #i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong. #just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

[honeybard]

if there's one thing about Lou Wilson it's that he goes above and beyond when given the option to sabotage himself and his party

#escalation from pinocchio purposefully walking into a trap to him lying about getting possessed and burning everything fabian has on adaine #'fabian loses control of a bodily function' [picks the worst one] #also i think gunnie chefs tools casino bit could be an example #looking at the stepmother #he just keeps it interesting #dimension 20 #fantasy high #fhjy spoilers #OH AND how could i forget the bad awful no good day in leviathan

[albaricomics]

He can't stay awake during his own divorce

#They're so stupid and ridiculous #Setting a bad example to Anastacha dude #Sleepy sillies #that's not my neighbor #tnmn fanart #milkman #francis mosses #nacha mikaelys #alf cappuccin #albaricomics

[izuku]

This website makes me feel insane sometimes. “I stand with jewish people” you just reblogged a post saying we’re behind everything bad in the world. “Call me out if I ever say something antisemitic” you just posted that we should get over a pogrom. “I’m not antisemitic” you would not recognize antisemitism if it was a nazi talking to you for hours at a protest

#I hate that these are examples I saw in the last day #jumblr #antisemitism #so glad for other jews in the gc confirming I’m not losing my mind #izuku.post #(╥﹏╥) feels bad man

[mugentakeda]

more jetko tomfoolery

#jet: have you ever seen a bitch so bad you wanted to kill yourself? #smellerbee: can we talk about something else. like when are you gonna get a job for example #also as for why i think jet and iroh would still have beef even if jet never saw him heat his tea.... #i think jet would still find his vibes very off. and hed be right about that technically #and iroh wouldnt like jet because hes slimy and proud of it. and because he came over to their apt once and sat on zukos bed w his shoes on #he wants his kid to make friends. really he does. but why does this little punk have to be it. #jetko #jet #zuko #iroh #smellerbee #longshot #avatar the last airbender #atla #alicias art

[svtskneecaps]

i also just want to point out the qsmp members' commitment to like never letting the inactive members die. like dantdm logged on twice and is canonically dead and everyone continues to blame mysterious happenstance on him. spreen is canonically dead and yet people are still like namedropping him even tho the house façade he built has been demolished and also probably consumed by a mountain. they meme on kameto who's barely been on except that time he was a fed spy that was iconic as hell. they just immortalize their members and they're always so happy to see old faces come back and it lowkey makes me emotional lmfaoo like missa barely logged on for a while but goddamn nobody forgot his name bc philza can't go one day without mentioning him and mariana barely logs on but every time fit saw the homeless mariana in roier's city no matter what he'd stop dead and tell it "come home" and when slime came back to the server for elections after having logged off for the last like two months everyone was still excited to meet him bc the others had kept his memories on the server fresh and alive, maxo died canonically in the nuke and pierre pasted his face all over the server, luzu vanished for months and we never forgot him either thanks to the computers and foolish's wack ass family tree. like when purgatory teams were chosen and team red constantly joked about how it would be so over for the other teams once germán logged on despite the fact that germán had only ever logged on ONCE, the way they cheered when they snatched rubius in the split of green despite the fact that rubius hadn't logged on more than twice since march. they just keep the names alive all the time and it's like

it just makes me really happy to see. like it makes me really happy. like the admin team and the members alike are like 'no way in HELL are we letting your memory go' like damn once ur on isla quesadilla you really are stuck as an islander forever :D

#qsmp #shut up vic #block game brainrot #not gonna put this in the main body because 🤢 but also #filler tag filler tag ravioli ravioli you must hit read more to see this #the hatsune miku jokes to keep a member's memory alive during a long hiatus are also an example of this effect #anyway i really hope the server can continue and the issues are resolved #bc i'd really love to see pol back on the server like genuinely #there's more examples obviously and not all of them are ones i can remember #but just. i mean even the dead eggs whose admins aren't even on the team anymore #every month bad and dapper made a point to visit their graves and remember them (sometimes with company) #it's like holy shit fucking goddamn it hits me in the chest seriously #sorry for the massive unbroken paragraph that's how the thought looks in my head too so i opted not to break it up

[yardsards]

the owl house really said "familial love is stored in a gifted garment"

EDIT: forgot one! thanks @cat-eared-exam-taker

#eliot posts #toh #the owl house #i was on the fence abt including either of the examples w amity and the twins #(esp the concealment stones bc idk if they even count as garments) #but i figured in both cases helping her be gay and do crimes is very much a form of affection from them even if less soft than the others #eda clawthorne #luz noceda #emira blight #edric blight #amity blight #darius toh #hunter toh #king clawthorne #alador blight #i want dadrius to get hunter a new cloak SO BAD #ive mentioned it before but i always go wild when stuff like this happens in fiction #bc i've always loved lending my jackets/shawls/scarves/hats/gloves to my irl friends #makes me feel like im protecting them and keeping them safe #and i knit and sometimes sew so p much all of my irl friends have AT LEAST gotten a hat #but i made of of them a long forest green cloak which he loved #it always makes me feel SO WARM INSIDE when i see someone wearing something i made them #but even seeing them wear things like friendship bracelets kinda makes me feel that way #i like having kinda made my mark on them even when not keeping them warm/covering them #not in a possessive ''show everyone that you're mine!'' way. none of it visibly ties back to me #(except in hs when i'd lend them my letterman's jacket w my surname on it) #but i know it's from me and they know it's from me and they chose to put that onto themself #my love language is acts of service and that's what i'm doing when i make someth handmade or lend em someth practical #but they can recieve it as gift-giving or a stand-in for physical affection. which both VERY MUCH do not come naturally to me

[live-from-flaturn]

American Television after 5 years of pushing for queer representation: I hope you wanted unnecessary drama, angst with a maybe resolution, and three unfulfilling seasons of questionably written flirtation. And that all comes before anything is half-confirmed with a singular lukewarm kissing scene between two conventionally attractive, white bisexual women!

Thai Television .3 seconds after they figured out queer content is marketable: Did you want something kinky, soft, or stupid? Did you want cat ears? We’ve got cat ears! We’ve got safe/sane/consensual OR off-the-charts bad etiquette BDSM. We’ve got college students out the ass! As long as they’re an engineer or architect, choose your flavor. Do you want an age gap or classmates? Something for adults? Teens? Everyone was childhood besties, how about that??? This is a short order restaurant and I will flip you some gays like they’re hotcakes, just tell me what you want.

#yes i am aware that this simplifies a lot of larger cultural and sociopolitical issues #yes i am aware that gay marriage is legal here and not in thailand #yes this is a joke please do not come for my very short wig #i am so tired #anyway #thai bl #american tv #teen wolf i'm looking at you #also supernatural #and the 100 #jesus christ in heat there's so many examples #too many #kinnporsche #love in the air bl #lita the series #kpts #bad buddy #bed friend #meow ears up #between us #uwma the series #between us the series

[idkaguyorsomething]

the 1996 doctor who movie contains a perfect textbook example of fridging, wherein an established longtime character is killed off unceremoniously, with very little agency or time spent on their own perspective when they’re literally being killed, usually as a means to provide shock value, raise the stakes, or make the main character feel bad for thirty seconds before moving on

what sets it apart from every other loving wife and children in every superhero backstory ever, though, is that the person they fridged was THEIR OWN MAIN CHARACTER

#you can’t get this shit anywhere else #i love it and i hate it #doctor who #seventh doctor #eighth doctor #doctor who 1996 #fridging #time lords in refrigerators #yeah okay it definitely wasn’t as bad as some other examples #but if you’ve seen that poll i’m running you can tell how it uh. it sure was something.

[aroaceleovaldez]

underappreciated Nico detail that I like - he seems to be an angry crier! very frequently he's angry when he cries and he cries when he's extremely angry. very AuDHD of him. emotional regulation sucks my guy and he's just going through it.

#pjo #riordanverse #nico di angelo #also fun to think about Nico getting pissed off and then getting even more pissed off that he's turning into a bawling mess #or Nico getting sad/upset and the rage just flips on so he's sniffling and crying and cussing under his breath while kicking stuff #i mean how many times has nico had a moment of someone trying to comfort him and his reaction like 90% of the time is ''fuck off'' #nico thinking about his trauma: [through tears] i need to go kill something right now or i'll explode #nico working on processing emotions character arc except instead of him stopping being an angry crier #it just turns into his friends holding a pillow for him to beat the shit out of until he works the energy out #shoutout to the cupid scene in particular as one of my favorite examples of this #just cause i love Nico having a breakdown and Jason watching it like ''uh oh. i think Bad Things Will Happen if he *actually* starts crying #other favorite example is TTC. Nico being so upset he creates a rift in the ground and tells Percy to die #nico is not uwu sad boy soft baby kitten tears crier #he is yelling things that would get him cancelled on the internet while snotty and bawling #he is insulting and threatening everyone in a 10ft radius

[lover-praxis]

i love when songs say “stop” and then the music pauses, i eat it up every time

#olivia rodrigo #bad idea right #taylor swift #dress #uhhh those are examples #but there’s more #stop! #hammer time

[crossmyheartwonttellnoother]

hc that andrew laughs but only at neil's deranged jokes

#(as much as andrew would laugh tho) #like #idk like someone is like oh my dad was bad #and neil says yeah my dad too #and they ask what did he do #and he's just like #got him killed wbu #it's a poor example but you get the gist #andrew minyard #neil josten #andreil #aftg #all for the game

[luna-lovegreat]

So one thing I like about Time is that he will talk about his life and journeys

He talks about it! He'll tell the boys stories and answer questions. (...when asked)

Obviously he tells his family- Malon knows everything

But he has also never held back from telling the boys stories or answering questions

I'm still always cackling over him telling them about gerudo town- he is way too proud to brag about being a mischievous gremlin

"I proved to be a greater thief than all of ganons tribe"- oh yeah. He's definitely the good influence. (That's sarcasm, Wars is the one good example for the younger ones.)

He just. He looks so smug to tell them about his experiences with the Gerudo- I love how often we see him just talking to them and answering questions about his life.

Even if it's clearly painful memories- he has still always told them

*sobs*

Obviously Time talks to Twilight the most about stuff- and everyone knows that (to where Sky went to him for questions about Time)

But the thing that get me the most is Wind.

Wind asked about... everything! Wind asked about his first journey and his life- and Time told him

The sheer transition from

"I was wondering... about your original journey"

To

"You told me about your original journey. Everything you said... the sages you described, the old traditions, the old stories- all of it! ...)

And this literally drives me insane because Time told him- Time told him everything! He told him about the sages, traditions- Time literally openly talked to Wind about his first Journey because he asked.

The Hero of Time's story had always been a tragedy- I mean... yikes. Trauma much? But I think people overlook this part of him- that he's older. All the hurt and scars are still there, but he has learned to talk about it to deal with it. And I think I know why- (Read)

Malon Malon Malon Malon!!! Jojo showed this set up for their marriage- Time was and is traumatized. But he and Malon worked to talk through things. I mean. Can you imagine keeping secrets from Malon? I don't want to. I feel like she would throw a cow at me. Anyways.

It takes a lot to work through trauma and learn to talk through it. Malon claimed him tho, so I don't think he had a choice. But seriously- she helped him work through things as family. Which led to a successful marriage for both of them, and got Time to where he can talk about these things with the boys :D

But

Time is a troll, so although he will share his insane life stories.... he will also say he fought the moon with no more context, and tell his wife that they have a descendant but not freaking tell her which one it is.

He's so insane I love it <3

Just don't forget this part of him... don't forget that rather it's sad or goofy or whatever- he will talk about his life. If someone simply asks

:)

.

Art and comic by Jojo @linkeduniverse au! :DDD

@adrift-in-thyme

#linked universe #linkeduniverse #Lu Malon #Lu time #goof #WHAT a way to be promoted to grandpa who shares crazy stories #I feel like I'm contradicting everyone here #everyone seems to incorporate him being traumatized and silent and secretive about it #and he's definitely traumatized but #I mean he even responded well to Wild holding up Majoras mask in the masks comic #he WILL talk about it #which is a good thing... sometimes. he's definitely a bad example with the Gerudo town stuff tho #'I humiliated them' could he be any more smug about that difnfigjgifjrg #anyways #I'm doing it!!! I'm posting!! #I hope it's ok to tag you trin? #let me know if not :)) #and if I said anything offensive or something ever. let me know. #I love you guys :)