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kisakis-boyfriend · 5 months

Text

Scissoring with the boys pt. 1

Pairings: Mikey, Kazutora, Kokonoi, & Inui x reader (separately)

Warnings: Trans male!reader, dom!reader (Mikey, Koko, Kazutora), trans characters, scissoring, dirty talk, use of the terms: pussy, cunt, tdick, clit, hole, Koko calls you 'daddy'

Genre/Format: Smut; Short scenarios

Author's Note: This is my first time writing a trans reader, so I hope I can do you guys justice! I'd also be down to do another batch of these scenarios at some point :3

Please check my blog title to verify whether requests are closed or not! Thank you!

“Oh shit...mmph!” His sweet voice rang out, mixed in with gasps from both you and your pretty boyfriend as you grind your cunt on his harder. Mikey's legs are tangled with yours on top of the plush bed, scissoring your pussies together for the first time

The sensation of his wet hole squishing against yours felt incredible; an unmatchable pleasure that causes you to speed up, vigorously thrusting your hips as you rub against him faster, biting your lip to stifle the grunts and moans falling with every passing second

Mikey can barely keep himself propped up because of your brutal pace. His eyes squeeze shut as his head falls back in ecstasy, a curtain of gold hanging behind his head beautifully while your bodies tremble in sync and your orgasms inch closer

“You're so wet, Mikey. Must feel pretty good, yeah?” You teased, recognizing the tight feeling deep within your stomach that warned of an incoming climax. “Gonna cum for me, right? Gonna gush all over me? Mmm, cum all over my cunt, Mikey...wanna feel how much you love this~ ”

You rolled your hips against the blond's little cunt, moaning loudly when your clits rubbed together and balling the sheets underneath your fists as you heard Mikey scream, “Cumming!! Y/n!” Rolling his hips just as hard against yours while coating your holes in slick cum as the wettest sounds filled the room

Your own release followed immediately after. Stars flooded your vision as white hot pleasure coursed through your entire body. Mikey's thighs shook as the aftershocks of his orgasm caused him to buck against your pussy and overstimulated both of you in the process

Collapsing back onto the bed in exhaustion, Mikey sighed while running a hand through his messy hair. Post-sex giggles spilled from the two of you as you regained your composure, laying there with your legs still loosely tangled until you had the strength to sit up and clean up and cuddle for a while

“Aaahh!! T-too fast...y/n please...” Your precious tiger whimpered at the new pace. Misty golden eyes were transfixed on the two tdicks rubbing against each other while you continued thrusting as quickly as you could, dripping so much wetness onto the sheets and all over Kazutora's cunt

“You can take it, baby. You can take it. You're my good boy, right?” You cooed at your darling, panting and sweating profusely from how fucking good Kazutora's pussy felt on yours. Rubbing against your folds as his cum mixed with yours from your previous round, acting as extra lube for your slippery cunts to move faster together

“God you feel good, baby...haah! Yeah grind against me...just like tha-aaat!! ” Tears pooled on your lashes as Kazutora began thrusting against you roughly, finally giving in as the need to cum overtook him

“Y/n...mmm aah~ Pl-please...need to– ” Half-lidded eyes gazed into his as you nodded your head, just as eager to stain him with your seed again

Shameless moans spilled from your lips as you chased your climax, Kazutora's lovely voice harmonized with yours from his own approaching climax all the same. With a final burst of strength, you sped up once more, letting your mouth fall open in a silent moan while you came hard against Kazutora's spasming cunt

“Fuck that was so good....did you like it, Tora?” The dazed smile while he nodded at your question was enough of an answer. His eyes fluttered closed as he exhaled a shaky breath, grinning when he felt your hands massaging his legs gently. Your fingers found Kazutora's and squeezed lightly, helping to ground him while his high subsided

“Mm fuck yeah, daddy~ Fuck my pussy~ ” Your lover purred, throwing his head back and rolling his hips against you. His moans were the prettiest, sluttiest sounds, urging you to thrust your cunt against his even harder — even faster — until Kokonoi was nothing but a squirting mess

A sharp thrust from your hips prompted your whimpering boy to beg you for permission to cum again. The way your clit rubbed against his, all puffy and wet, sent tingles throughout his body. Having your bodies connected in this way was downright addicting

“Fuck, baby... You like when I fuck your hole like this, dontcha? ” You moaned, and Kokonoi responded with a sultry 'mm-hmm'. You reached out to pet your partner's cheek lovingly, brushing your fingertips across his porcelain skin and carding through the hair at the nape of his neck

One rough tug at his roots was more than enough to bring Kokonoi to the edge, causing his thighs to tremble uncontrollably. You began thrusting faster, trying to wring an intense orgasm out of your pretty boy. “Gonna cum for me? Yeah? Call yourself my good boy while you cum, babydoll.”

Kokonoi was breathless due to the relentless pace you were now going at. Your folds rubbed together in a pornographic display, squelching loudly while he chanted, “I'm your good boy, I'm your good boy, oh fuck– I-I'm your...aaah! Your g-good boooyyaaaaahhhfffuuucckk—!! ”

The sensation of your lover's pussy squirting right up against yours while you were grinding together tipped you over the edge as well; cumming with a broken whine as Koko's juices covered both of your bodies

It took a while for either of you to recover, but you did eventually. Exchanging soft kisses amongst the afterglow of such a messy session

Inui could be incredibly rough sometimes, and you wouldn't have it any other way. The way he would let go after a while, growling and bucking his hips as if he was in heat, was absolutely a turn-on

“Oh god– fuck...Inupi, yes—!! ” You yelled, matching the quick pace that your partner had worked up to currently. Both of you were now pressing your cunts together tightly and scissoring with a terrifying speed, panting and grunting while staring into each other's lust-filled eyes

Inui's pussy was dripping down his thick thighs, coating your folds in his juices. His tdick was just big enough to dip inside of your pussy if you were at the right angle; brushing against your walls a tiny bit and sending a little shiver down your spine

“Cum with me– C-cum on my dick, y/n! ” Inui exclaimed. Using every bit of leverage that he had, your partner used his tdick to stimulate your clit and shallowly fuck the inside of your pussy. Ripping a cacophony of wanton moans out of you until you came along with him

He didn't stop immediately though, continuing to rub against your soaked hole through cloudy vision and a hazy mind. Your overstimulated whimpers did nothing except spur Inui on even more, rolling his hips until his muscles gave out and he slumped down on the bed — your own collapse following suit

Once you recovered with just enough energy to move, you crawled over to Inui and curled up next to him. Rubbing your lover's chest while his hand rested on top of your own, exchanging sleepy smiles before you both fell asleep

Reblogs are extremely appreciated <3

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blorbo-adoption-poll · 7 days

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Adoption poll round 3 match 8

Natural Harmonia Gropius “N” (Pokémon)

Tony Tony Chopper (One Piece) and Zuko (Avatar the Last Airbender)

Propaganda under the cut

"N" Natural Harmonia Gropius (Pokémon) Propaganda

Listen. Liste-N, even. N is in desperate need of a better family. He grew up with Pokemon, and was then "adopted" at a young age by Ghetsis, who wanted to use his ability to communicate with them. From the moment of his adoption, N was isolated from most humans and was only given the opportunity to speak with Pokemon who had suffered at the hands of humans. This pushed him to the direction of Pokemon Liberation- He believed by separating people and Pokemon, the world would be perfect. And Ghetsis only encouraged it, forming Team Plasma and crowning N as the king.

Believing N to be fully brainwashed and unable to be deterred, he set N out to preach and convince people to release their Pokemon. As the story goes on, N is challenged by seeing many people and Pokemon getting along and enjoying each other's company. He's stubborn about it for a long time- But when you finally beat him in the final stretch he finally starts accepting that maybe he was wrong- That maybe different ideas in the world CAN co-exist, as can people in Pokemon (though not needing Pokeballs is definitely still a thing he would like to happen.)

And this... Well, what do you think Ghetsis does?

He goes haywire! He calls in good-for-nothing, warped, defective, a freak without a human heart! My poor boy not only gets his worldview shaken, but the guy he considers his dad just loads up on the insults- No doubt to intimidate him! N deserved soooo much better than Ghetsis, which is why I'm submitting him for Tumblr Adoption. He is able to start healing later- Like look at his battle sprite between Black/White vs Black/White 2! He's smiling! And his encounter theme! It's so much more cheerful in BW2! It's not called "Prisoner to a Formula" anymore- It's "N's Theme"!!!! He so deserves blorbo title. From start to finish, a prisoner and tool to learning what he wants and who he really is! He's N, babes, and I'd give the world for him!!!!!!!!!!

Also he says "Burn, baby, BURN!" in Pokemon White while awakening Reshiram. This is so important. To me.

———————

had a crush on him as a kid and now i think he’s neat

Zuko (Avatar the Last Airbender) Propaganda

zuko is a silly awkward turtle dude who is also a badass with a scar, need i say more?

Tony Tony Chopper (One Piece)

No propaganda given

#adoption poll #tournament poll #natural harmonia gropius #n #n pokemon #Pokémon #pokémon black and white #tony tony chopper #one peice #zuko #prince zuko #avatar the last airbender

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utilitycaster · 6 months

Note

I'm so kdhdkdjdkd jazzed about the fjorester proposal !!!! But something that popped up pretty immediately that baffled me was these like... cope posts i guess? Of how "beau and jester should cheat leaving their partners for eachother and how dw guys marriage is just going to spice up the inevitable affair" and it's not even treated as a joke and Im just confused? Like i got into cr2 by the time it was over with so idk what it was like waiting for releases, but why after all this time do people hold on as much as they do? Do they like the story or not?

So I will be totally honest: I am not above checking the blogs of those I know hold terrible opinions, for a number of reasons both reasonable (keeping an eye out for potential harassment; inspiration for meta; my genuine enjoyment of analyzing fandom trends) and less so (schadenfreude and sending DMs that say Can You Believe This Idiot) but I actually have not seen this! To be clear, I would not be surprised it was out there - heaven knows this was a refrain during late Campaign 2 and in the leadup to the two-shot - but I thought that most people finally gave up in late 2022 after the two-shot made it clear the existing relationships are still very much in place. Granted I, as always, rarely go on Twitter.

Anyway. I think some of it is just that people whose enjoyment of works hinges on their ships becoming canon, rather than that being one of many facets to their fandom, also tend to not know when to give up just generally (you can look around this website and still find people hopping mad and/or pining for resolution regarding shows that ended before Campaign 2 even started). I think most of them did finally give up and leave, which is probably healthier for both them and the fandom, but there will probably be a dwindling number of holdouts who will gasp out on their deathbed fifty years hence "Beau and Jester should have been together" to a politely confused hospice nurse.

To actually answer your question, no, they do not like the story. I know I've been very hard on people who seem to only be able to enjoy fiction through a lens of either shipping or intense projection of the self onto existing characters, but in my defense, I'm right. This is a whole separate post, which to be honest I've kind of already made several times, but the usual complaint about the Campaign 2 noncanon ships (echoed in the complaints about Campaign 3 primarily by those who do like the canon ships thereof) was that they would have happened and been flawless and perfect but for that Pesky Plot, ie, the story. Unless the entire point of a story is a romance (eg: the genre that is cleverly titled "Romance") romance is always optional.

I also think, to be honest, Campaign 2 attracted people who were patient. This is a good thing! I think that, for example, people who are not entirely feeling Campaign 2 13 episodes in are valid, because I was similarly enjoying myself but not entirely won over by the plot yet, and it was only a combination of that patience and the burgeoning character dynamics that kept me going (plus the fact that watching week to week is a lower commitment than a binge). Granted I think if you fully give up at that point you are weak and will not survive the winter and should probably go watch Michael Bay movies or Bluey, but that's a separate point. Anyway. Some people are patient beyond a point where it is rewarding or even neutral and pass into a realm of showing up to the Story That Has Fjorester and Beauyasha In It muttering "I hope this doesn't have any fucking Fjorester and Beauyasha". I don't know how to help them, nor do I particularly want to, but I do know that not going on Twitter has been super helpful.

One final note: again, haven't seen the thing you mention in your ask yet in relation to this one-shot and not for lack of poking around Tumblr at least; but I have seen people who were deeply bitter about Campaign 2 but are still around for Campaign 3, though not a ton, and this was also frankly true of people who loved Campaign 1 and have not really cared since but still stick around. There's a weird zombie problem in the fandom; you get people who are very invested in being a fan of Critical Role and can't seem to leave, but haven't actually been happy for literal years, either because they were ultimately only fans of Vox Machina, or the Mighty Nein, or a specific ship within that. It is actually something I try to be cognizant of because I was very cautious about becoming that during the stretch when I was more frustrated by Campaign 3 than I am now. I think, ultimately, it's a conflation of one's fandom with one's external identity and I don't know how that happens or how to fix it but that might also be a factor: people who really don't like the show and haven't for years and are grasping at a thing they think would fix that and make them happy again, and refuse to admit it might be time to move on because that would mean they need to change their conception of themselves.

#answered #Anonymous #follow for more amateur fandom sociology #critical role spoilers

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jinkookspencil · 1 year

Text

unlucky in love

Your best friend Namjoon proposes a surprising, prolonged backup plan for the decades to come……

“Would….Would it be so bad?”

“You and me. You and me stuck with each other.”

tags/description: ~6k words / namjoon x (f) reader / angst / fluff / friends to lovers(?) / pining / no smut but alludes to sex possibly happening at one point / no triggers or warnings, except swearing / happy ending / slow burn within their timelines since this takes years…. / jane austen references, title is a reference to p&p but fair warning i might just change it to 'unlucky' in the future / three ‘chapters’ / age of namjoon in each chapter: 1: ~27, 2:~32, 3: ~36 / chapters are separated by little ✣ ’s / feedback always welcome!

author’s note: every time i say I’ll upload my jin fics another fic pops into and out of my head - this namjoon fic came out of nowhere and i just thought to upload it to celebrate the release of indigo. the jin ones are coming very soon though. </3 proud of this though, besides the jin wip series, this is my first longer work!

Namjoon was a catch. An ideal man. The perfect man, really. It wasn’t hard for you, one of his best friends, to see why practically every woman on the planet fell for him. It wasn’t just the people who knew him, either. You could see it in the barista’s eyes when you grabbed coffee together. You heard your friends’ countless gushes over him, even the ones that were taken. And you couldn’t blame them…. He was smart, a little goofy, respectful, manly, sometimes endearing, and he was pretty easy on the eyes too. Every woman’s dream. Practically a Jane Austen character come to life.

You could see it, understand it….you just never…. felt it. Namjoon was a close friend. Nothing more. Nothing less.

You always had to dismiss people who thought otherwise or thought that that’s how you knew each other. Work had made your paths cross a few years ago when you were both in your early twenties and taking your first steps into the world of art. When he walked into your job at the film institute one morning, he had wanted to find out more about the artistry of film, the one realm of art he didn’t explore as thoroughly as paintings, sculptures, and literature, which you had always thought of studying as well. A quick conversation about film turned into an hour-long discussion on art and passion; the rest was history. Whenever Namjoon came back to learn about film, you took the opportunity to ask him about literature and art, whenever he brought it up, and before you knew it a friendship formed. He was the only one that got you, on your passions, art, and, as you’d later find out, in life.

Movie nights at his place and your place were common, as were trips to libraries and bookstores to pick out different reads, which you’d begin at coffee shops over cronuts and pies, but you enjoyed your regular late-night therapy sessions just as much, talking about life and its complexities, sharing ideas and personal philosophies… He was the only one that ever cared about that sort of thing…. And even when it got to discussions on love, everything remained respectful - especially when the other was in a relationship. Boyfriends came and went, with only one ever getting “worried” about Namjoon, whose girlfriends came and went over the years as well.

You understood art, you understood each other, you just never understood love.

It was the main topic of conversation on your cold, December walk, trying to figure it out as you always did.

“Why are we just so unlucky?” you complained. “Do you think there’s something wrong with us? Are we attracting these weirdos?”

He giggles. “I wouldn’t say that. We’re just ourselves, aren’t we? And don’t be mean. People just play a role and live fake lives because they don’t know any better. What did that guy tell you once? Didn’t he say that he was an author but it turns out he paid someone to write some fake short story about a cloud or some shit? Didn’t they even write the good morning texts he sent you?”

“Oh god, don’t remind me of that lazy ass, Joon,” you shake your head. “As if you didn’t date that girl who said she was an art curator but couldn’t pronounce Monet.”

“Ay,” he sighs. “I just wish people were honest to themselves, you know. So what, if you can’t pronounce Monet and didn’t like art? That girl was fine, she was just a compulsive liar. I can’t have that.”

“Sincerity is dying, Kim Namjoon. It lives in you and me only. And in, let’s hope, a lovely man out there who proves me wrong. And in someone for you, too.”

“Let’s hope. Otherwise, we’ll be stuck with each other.”

“Oof, can’t have that,” you laugh, but a couple of steps later you notice that Namjoon had stopped walking, the bite of the hotteok he had taken from the dessert in your hands lingering in his mouth for a moment too long before he swallowed it.

Eyes squinted in a far off-gaze, with his head tiled, you knew Namjoon was in thought. As always, you stopped and stared at him until he came back to Earth, not to interrupt his train of thought.

“Would….Would it be so bad?” he finally speaks.

“Would what be so bad?”

“You and me. You and me stuck with each other.”

W- all of a sudden?!

“Namjoon?!”

“Listen, I know we’re friends. Just friends, right? For all these years? And even right now… like sorry, Y/N, but I don’t know if I feel so attracted to you… I think I know too much and we’re too alike but that’s not the point. Just… Would it be so bad?” he asks, but he goes on. “I guess you’re right, we’ve both just been so…. unlucky. I like to think there’s someone out there for me and for you but… I can’t deny that I’m losing hope, at least for myself. You are, too, you just admitted it. The new year is starting soon and I've been thinking about what I want in life... And… I want a wife. I want kids. And..”

“Namjoon, what the fuck are you saying?!,” you yell in the middle of the snowy park. “Kids?!”

“Not now!” he explains. “Of course not now. But… look they always say ‘marry your best friend’, right? Well, you’re my only ‘best friend’ that’s a girl. It’s not like I can ask Yoongi to marry me.”

You feel your head spin at the words spewing out of Namjoon’s mouth.

“Kim Namjoon! A wife, marriage, kids, what the fuck are you saying?”

He takes a deep breath and grabs your elbow, leading you to sit on a nearby park bench.

“Breathe, Y/N. I thought this through and we can scrap the idea and pretend like I never said anything, but just hear me out for a moment, with a calm mind.”

Looking at Namjoon, still confused, you take a couple of deep breaths before you nod at him to continue talking.

“I’m not saying this for right now. What I’m saying is… in years, if we’re still friends, if we’re still single, if we’re still unlucky in love, if we still get each other…. If, and if, and if…. Why don’t we… why don’t we give this a shot? Just as a backup? We can either try a relationship - but that might be too weird because you know,” he tilts his head, “As I said, I think you’re not… and I am not… at least right now, anyway… Anyway! We can do that or we can just… get married regardless. Maybe have kids some way or the other. I know you want that in life but not right now, and I feel the same. And who knows? Our ‘wants’ can easily change…. But if…. It’ll be nice to share my life with my best friend.”

You stare at Namjoon, taking in his… proposal. “When?”

“When should we do this?” he assumes is your question, staring up at the sky while he figures out an answer. “When I’m around 35, 36, 37? That seems good for both of us. That gives us plenty of time to find someone else, if that happens and…”

“No, I mean… when did you come up with this idea?”, you ask.

“Oh, just right now when we were walking over there,” he says, pointing to the place he froze.

“And you’re so ready to make this offer?!”

“You’re my best friend!” he exclaims. “Wasn’t this always a safe space for us to just say what’s on our minds?”

His tone couldn’t be more serious, even with the gentle expression on his face.

“Look, it’s just an idea. It’s just a backup. And hey if in the future you or I feel like this conversation was a bad idea we can forget it ever happened. Wouldn’t it be nice to spend our nights watching films everyone thinks is too pretentious, talking about life, then in the mornings visiting libraries and galleries, with hotteoks and coffee? And not have to worry about lovers who never gave a shit about all of that? It’s about more than that but…,” he pauses. “We can still do it as friends, but…. just in case we don’t find that with someone else….”

You stare at Namjoon. He was your best friend. He understood you more than any lover, or any friend, ever had. Would it be so bad? To marry your best friend?

“And what about the issue of attraction, Joon? We both think that’s important. I hate to break it to you, bestie, but I’m not attracted to you, either.”

“That’ll resolve itself,” he laughs. “We’ll probably be too old to care. Or.. we’ll see…. There are so many ‘if’s’ for this to happen and I don’t know what future Namjoon will think. It’s just an offer.”

You had plenty of time. Sure, you’d find someone…. Sure, he would too - if given the chance, hundreds of girls would line up just for the chance to date him. OF course, you’ll both find other people…. But for now…. Would it hurt to not completely disregard your best friend?

“I’m living every girl’s dream… getting proposed to under conditions, with the guy telling her she’s unattractive and saying he’ll be stuck with me.”

“Sorry, just think of yourself as a modern-day Elizabeth Bennett,” he smiles.

“Oh, don’t flatter yourself by insinuating that you’re a Darcy,” you say, making him laugh.

“So… when you’re 35?” you ask after a moment of silence, looking at Namjoon through your eyelashes, picking at the paper packaging of your shared dessert in your hands, his twiddling with the strings on his hoodie.

“Around?”, he answers.

You nod, smiling at your best friend.

“Okay. That gives me plenty of time to find an actual Mr. Darcy.”

“I’m sure he’ll bewitch you, you idiot….”

✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣

“Finally, it’s been too long.”

Those are the words you’d greeted Namjoon with the moment you spotted him waiting for you outside the cafe. It had been too long. Over the years, you kept in touch as best as you could, but with hectic work schedules and different careers, it was hard to see each other as often as you used to in your twenties.

“It has,” he smiles, wrapping an arm around you in a hug. “What has it been like 5, 6 months? How’ve you been?”

You catch up for the next hour over coffee and pastries, talking about life, the world, and art, as you always had, as if you’d just seen each other the other day. But, as the sun began to set and the cafe got too busy to relax in, you were reminded that your long-anticipated hangout day was slowly coming to an end.

“I don’t know if it’s our age or if that croissant ruined it, but how is this iced latte so sweet?” he wonders, taking a sip of the extra coffee he ordered to go as you watched the summer sky change colors in the park.

“Let’s switch,” you offer, handing Namjoon your iced americano. “You never liked coconut milk, anyway, why would you order it with your coffee? Dairy is still bad for you, huh?”

“Yep. I can’t power through the intolerance anymore,” he laughs. “Could it be possible that my girlfriend’s dairy intolerance made me even more intolerant?”

“The model, right?” you ask.

“Yep. She’s…alright. And hey, I’ve been meaning to ask you…. how’s that guy you’ve been seeing? How long has it been now? A year?”

“A year and a half,” you nod. “That’s actually the reason I’ve been rushing to see you…

I…uh.. I’m engaged.”

Namjoon’s pace slows. “Oh.”

Oh?

“Uhm, congratulations,” he says sternly.

“Thanks….” you murmur, side-eyeing Namjoon who just stares at his feet as you both continue to walk.

“Do you like him?”

“….Of course, I like him, Namjoon. Why else would I accept? Why else would I date him for a year and a half of my life?”, you snap.

But Namjoon remains quiet, merely nodding in the silence.

“I thought you’d be happy for me,” you say.

“I would be…. If you were happy.”

“I am happy,” you say, stopping him and standing your ground.

“Then where the fuck is your ring?”

You quickly hide your hands in your pockets in a feeble attempt at concealing the truth he just spat out. He had given you a ring. A diamond ring with a gold band. One he said reminded him of you. Even though you told him you hated diamonds, and only wore silver. It was the thought that counts, right? The gift…. The proposal. It didn’t matter that he didn’t bother getting one that fit either, it was too big and too…. not you. As he said, you should be grateful that he finally popped the question…..

“It was too big,” you say meekly, and Namjoon scoffs.

“Even so, why didn’t he get it resized? Why isn’t it on a chain around your neck? Is it fucking gold?!”

“I…”

“To this day… even if we don’t see each other as often, I’d still consider you my best friend,” he interrupts you softly. “I know you more than anyone, Y/N. If this is the same guy you talked to me about a year ago….,” he sighs. “I know the movies you find romantic, the books and characters you fawn over, the tropes you like, the art that affected you… and I know he isn’t.. he wouldn’t… He wouldn’t do all the things you wanted, all the things you deserved, Y/N. What happened to that hope you always had, even whenever we called ourselves unlucky? Where is my best friend? The Y/N I knew, who looked for a Darcy or a Knightley or whatever the fuck? That Y/N? She wouldn’t settle for someone like that.”

“I woke up. I was delusional. I realized that I don’t live in a fucking Jane Austen novel, Namjoon. There’s no one else, okay?”

He shakes his head. It stings more than anything, seeing the disappointment and…. hurt…. in his eyes. “Your reason for marrying a guy is ‘there’s no one else’? Y/N….”

“Don’t bring up that stupid ass deal now, Namjoon.”

“Did I?!”, he asks, and it’s the first time you sense anger in his voice. You rarely could… even over the years.

“Fuck the deal. Look at the guy you’re marrying,” he spits the words out, the last word escaping like venom, before rubbing the space between his brows. “How many times did you come to me because he never got you, huh? Because he never made any effort to do so?

I just want to see you happy, Y/N.”

“Well, open your eyes, Namjoon because that’s what you’ll see.”

But you walk away the moment he looks at you, knowing you’d be unable to hide another lie, nor the tears forming in your eyes.

He knew you too well.

✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣ ✣

“Did you hear who’s here?”

Looking up from your notebook, you see the excitement in your co-partner’s eyes… under all that blue mascara and funky makeup.

“Put that thing away! It’s a party. Guess who’s here?”

“Who?” you resign, putting your tiny notepad and pen in your purse.

“Only your FAVORITE film director, AND he’s looking to fund the film institute, AND he’s newly single.”

You contain your excitement, but she’d never realize it was there. “You talk like a teenager when we need to get down to business, ‘partner’. Is he really here and looking to fund it?”

“And he’s single,” she reiterates. “Oh, and the Kim Namjoon is here.”

…..Oh.

“He's so handsome, isn't he? And on top of all that talent? I think he’s looking to put together some pieces for an upcoming exhibition in his gallery… And word on the street is he's looking to get into film, too. Actually….," she pauses, "you two seem like a good fit. I’m sure you’ll work together one day.”

The thought of seeing Namjoon made your heart race, but really there was no reason for you to be surprised. The both of you had become prominent people in the art industry… It was more surprising that you hadn’t bumped into each other in all these years, dancing within the same circles. And you always promised yourself…

Still, you were there for work, you reminded yourself quickly. Sure, it was a party, but everyone networked at these things. And you had a film institute that needed funding….

The night went well, you mixed and mingled with so many people that were interested in film and the institute, and you can’t help but feel a rush when receiving your favorite director’s business card, complete with his personal phone number…. Where that’d go, you couldn’t tell, but his brief mention of funding and a collaboration idea was more than enough. Lost in the adrenaline, you forgot about Namjoon entirely….

“Y/N, there you are!,” you hear from behind you,. It was a partygoer you had just met….a familiar, looming figure was talking to someone else behind her. “We’ve been looking for you everywhere! Have you met Mr. Kim Namjoon?”

Of course. This was it.

The all-too-familiar figure turns towards you, his glaring eyes fixated on yours for a moment so long you missed the partygoer’s unnecessary introductions.

“….Miss Y/N here is a leading figure in the world of film,” you hear, “which I know you expressed interest in delving into, Mr. Kim.”

“You don’t need to introduce Miss. Y/N L/N to me. It’s good to see you,” he says with a smile, eyes still locked onto yours, but you don’t miss his fingers twitching around the glass in his hand before he outstretches his other arm.

“It’s good to see you too,” you reply, shaking his hand. Just as soft and big as you remember it to be.

“Oh! Have you… met?” the elderly lady asks from somewhere in your peripheral vision.

“We have,” you simply respond with a nod, but Namjoon elaborates.

“We… now.. we now know of each other.”

“Oh…. Well… why haven’t you collaborated yet?! I’ll leave you to it, figure it out and make it happen,” you hear the woman insist and briefly see her figure disappear into the crowd.

“It really is good to see you, Y/N,” he says, finally breaking the silence between you in the otherwise noise-filled room.

“Same to you, Namjoon….”

“I’m proud of you and all that you’ve done. I never got the chance to say that.”

“Thanks. I’m proud of you, too… ‘Mr. Kim’,” you laugh.

“Oh,” he winces with a chuckle, “It sounds even weirder coming from you. At this age and I still haven’t gotten used to it, to all of…. this,” he says, waving around to the party behind him and taking a sip of his drink.

“Don’t pretend like you don’t like a good party, Kim Namjoon, I know you too well.”

“You do, you do…..,” he says, nodding. “And I do, like a good party. But you know just as well as I do that this isn’t a party. This is just… networking and business.”

“Yeah… and you’re interested in film, all of a sudden….”

“Not all of a sudden, Y/N, you know that, but it is time for my foundation to step into film. We've neglected it for far too long, but… fuck I don’t want to talk about that…” he waves off. “You’re the only one here I can have a normal conversation with…”

You had both begun to hear distant calls of ‘Mr. Kim Namjoon!’

“….Can we step out for a while?”

Just around the corner from the gallery the event was held at, was a quaint yet artsy bookstore and bakery hybrid that was surprisingly still open at this hour. But at the employees’ silent acknowledgment of Namjoon, you suspected he was a regular… or the more obvious answer, they recognized him as famed writer and art philanthropist, Kim Namjoon.

“Sit, I’ll get us some stuff,” he says, before returning to you with two coffees and two pastries. “A lemon flavor and a dark chocolate one… Because we’ve gotten so old.”

You chuckle, taking a bite of the bittersweet dark chocolate pastry, the perfect cup of coffee in your hands, the beautiful bookstore you were in and wondering how you never found it, but most of all you were taking in the moment… Taking in the fact that you were sitting opposite Namjoon again. Taking him in. With his eyes wandering around in thought, and a smile on his face. Already, it was as if no time had passed at all. Except, age looked good a bit too good on him.

“Coffee, desserts, bookstores, and probably late-night conversations with Kim Namjoon… Takes me back.”

“Yeah…..” he thinks aloud, eyes still scanning above and below as he does…. “Yeah, I missed this.”

“…So have I…. I’m sorry I never reached out, Namjoon.”

“Don’t be,” he says, looking at you through his brows and taking a slow sip from his coffee. “I never reached out either.”

And…,” he starts, rubbing his hands together before continuing, “ I don’t know if I can take another year,” he says, breaking the silence. “Friends again?”

You don’t even have to think about it. “Friends again.”

“Good,” he sighs with a wide smile, his eyes still forming little crescent moons when he did so. “Phew. Finally, I’ll have someone that gets me. Maybe we both changed over the years, but even so, I’m just glad I’ll have someone to talk to about books and art again. Someone that doesn’t want something out of me or isn’t bored out of their mind when I do so like Yoongi. I made the funniest joke the other day and he just ignored me like I hadn’t said anything.”

“What was the joke?”

“What do you get if you cross a painter with a heavyweight boxer? ….Muhammad Dali.”

You scoff. “Seems like Seokjin rubbed off on you. Kim Namjoon, you haven’t changed.”

“Neither have you,” he says. “I saw you with your little notebook. Who brings a notebook to a party?”

“I was writing down information I knew I’d forget! Do you know how many people introduced themselves? I need to differentiate the flirting guy from the ‘kid faking that he’s in the industry’ from ‘serious collaboration potential’! They’re all in that sacred notebook, with a description of each person!”

“The flirting guy, huh? In addition to that too-good director? I saw him give you his number...” Namjoon chuckles, before going silent. “Whatever happened with… to the engagement?”

Despite having no contact with Namjoon over the past couple of years, there’s no way word wouldn’t have gotten to him. Despite everything, if you had made that mistake, he still would’ve been invited to the wedding.

��You know, Namjoon.”

He nods. He knows. He probably knows that he’s the one who woke you up from that nightmare too. But nothing needs to be said.

“Yeah,” you roll your eyes. “Whatever happened to that model by the way?”

“…Which one?” he smirks.

“Fuck off, Kim Namjoon,” you throw a flimsy napkin in his way, laughing while he explodes into his hearty, hyena laugh - the one he rarely lets out.

“Oh, it’s been ages since I heard that,” you say, pretending to wince at the noise.

“It’s been ages since it came out of me.....”

“Why? Seokjin’s not around? Too busy with his wife and kids?”, you ask.

“He’s around, still as funny, but… I don’t know, you make me laugh…differently…”

“It was your joke! You basically made yourself laugh, Joon,” you giggle.

“Oh, fuck,” he says. “…'Joon’…”

You search his face, trying to sense what he was feeling but you couldn’t tell what it was…

“No one called you that? Over the years? It seems like a… common, easy nickname for you….” you say calmly, wondering why no girlfriend or lover ever used the soft as summer nickname for the man who was the same.

“People tried to,” he shakes his head. “I never let them.”

“Why?” you ask, eyes narrowing. “Why, Namjoon?”

“Y/N…. I know I don’t have to explain sentimentality to you.” His gaze shifts from the paper cup he toyed with to your eyes, and again, you just sit in silence.

It was time.

“You know, Namjoon, I did a lot of thinking…. over the years… About myself, the world…. You know, we called ourselves unlucky but we’re really quite stupid.”

“I know,” he nods. “We are, but… go on.“

“It was stupid of us to attribute it all to luck and the world. Especially because… all these years, I don’t think either of us really knew what we were searching for. We chased the empty label of ‘love’ without defining how that’d look like to us. And that’s what I’ve been working on.”

“And?”

“And…. After countless movies, books, art, and a lot of self-reflection….. I finally have an idea.” Your eyes wandered as you talked, but you were determined to keep them on him, who listened intently, as you continued.

“I have an idea… of what love looks like to me. Whenever I thought about what I wanted, what I had and experienced… I realized that what I wanted was what we had. That friendship, that support, that empathy, respect, trust, honesty, and understanding… that… love.

I loved you, Namjoon. I love you.”

“And I loved you…and love you. I always did and always will,” he says immediately, calmly. “But…. what exactly are you saying?”

You knew he meant it as you did. You didn't need to define what type or over-analyze it and sub-categorize it as you would have when you were younger. It was love. Deep, true love. And it’s now or never...

“Is that offer still on the table?”

A chuckle escapes him, as well as the smile he tried so hard to contain.

“You needed to rewatch all those movies and reread all those books to figure it out? I could’ve painted you a picture years ago. But… you never even asked if I was single.”

“Are you?” you ask, hoping the quiet chuckle you let out concealed the bubbling feeling of regret in your chest. “Or is there another model? Some artistic muse? What did you call that one from years ago? ‘Alright’? ”

“The model, the curator, the.. whatever, they were all… alright but… wrong. No one ever… got me,” he admits, raising his eyebrows when he sees you nodding at his use of your words. You were on the same page. “I stopped searching for someone who did…. and then I went to that party.

I always wanted that for you, Y/N, but I never realized I needed it too…”

Namjoon was at his most vulnerable, and so were you, laying your honest truth out to the person who knew you best…. But it was easier to see it in his eyes. It’s something you hadn’t seen in him since your twenties, but he seemed more sure of himself than ever. So ready to be vulnerable, so ready to be honest, so…

“So…." you say, partly thinking aloud, partly hoping Namjoon could continue the conversation.

“So, you finally get why I made that offer, way back when?” he asks.

“How did you know? We were in our twenties… Wait… did you come up with this because you had feelings for me all along?!”, you say, mouth agape in shock and amusement. You’d never doubt your friendship was a sham, but what if…

“Don’t flatter yourself. I’m not the Knightley to your Emma, idiot, I wasn’t attracted to you then. It was just…. something that felt right. It still does. I didn’t know… much.”

“So, the offer is still on the table?”, you ask after a moment of silence.

“Of course it is.”

“Are you 35?”

“A little older,” he winces. "All this time and you're still bad at math, huh?"

You roll your eyes. “Well, you said ‘around 35’.... so, we’re right on schedule. And I still need to be wooed, Kim Namjoon. I know you have it in you,” you smile, feeling confidence return to your bloodstream like a rush of adrenaline after years without it.

“You finally know what you deserve,” he says softly. “You are getting bewitched, Y/N, whether you like it or not.”

“Bewitched and hitched?” you laugh.

“Hey, don’t come for my job. Or actually, a joint poetry book or short film shit would be nice, we should do that,” he thinks, “but yes…. bewitched and hitched.”

Staring at the man you knew so well sitting opposite you, you couldn’t wait.

“‘When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible,’” you quote quietly.

“When Harry Met Sally…,” Namjoon nods. “You loved that film.”

“I do…” you nod. “so with that in mind, how soon can we make the wedding?”

He laughs, his hand reaching for yours across the table before he stands up and envelops you in a warm, soft embrace. Taking in his familiar scent of coffee and cologne, you don’t want to let go. In any way. But he does, only to kiss you on the cheek and giggle when you tip-toe to reciprocate.

“And if we fight?”, you suddenly ask Namjoon, your demons briefly popping in to ruin the moment.

“We used to. As couples do,” he shrugs, taking your hands in his. “All those ‘if’s’ worked out in our favor, didn’t they? It didn’t seem like they did….until today.”

He brushes a hair away from your face, fingers grazing your jawline. Amidst all the familiarity of the night, this was new…. His lips slowly meet yours in a kiss as soft as summer and sweeter than the chocolate you could taste on him.

Breaking away, his hand instantly finds his stomach. You don’t need to theorize what it means, but you can’t hide the shock you’re feeling. He could be so innocent at times, you remember thinking, whenever you saw him rub his belly button every time he got butterflies from a girl.

“Wow, do people our age still get butterflies in their stomachs?” You giggle, placing your hand on his. This was definitely new ground. “And to think I caused this.”

“I hate how I could never control it, it feels like a tickle," he smiles. "Doesn’t help that I haven’t felt this in a while, though... I wish my 'tell' was as subtle as yours.”

“I have a tell?!!,” you yell, immediately wondering if anything gave away that you were feeling the same way.

“You do. Not to bring him up but I never saw it with what’s-his-face and that's when I knew… But anyways, I think I’ll keep it a secret. So you don’t make a note of it,” he says while you roll your eyes, but in doing so a book behind Namjoon catches your eye and suddenly, you remembered your surroundings.

“Anyways, is this beautiful place magically open for us to have this moment?”

“Well, if you’d say that, then I’m the wizard.”

“What?” you laugh.

“Sweetie, I own this place.”

You momentarily ignore another ‘first’ in your life, Namjoon calling you a pet name, to take in the fact that he owned the most beautiful place you’d ever seen in your life.

“You OWN this place?! And you never told me about it? This is what I feel most betrayed about, Joon,” you huff, looking around. Of course it was his. Every inch of this placed screamed his name. No wonder you loved it so much.

“I guess I have to explain this one to you, don’t I? I saved this place from going bankrupt and completely revamped it. I thought of you every step of the way and… you know, I’m a romantic. I liked to believe one day you’d find this place by chance and just get that it was mine…. And that that’s how we’d meet. There’s even a screening room upstairs, beside the mini gallery, so I’m surprised you hadn’t found this place yet. There’s even a DVD section because you went on about the importance of physical media, which I now get. You didn’t even notice the name, huh?”

You look around, finding the minimalistic lettering and logo of the place on the far wall. “Unlucky - Art. Books. Coffee.”

“I love it, Namjoon,” you say, looking around in wonder… “And let me guess, you called it ‘Unlucky’ to defy the word itself?”

He nods, smiling as he walks over to you. “We were never unlucky. We were lucky… because we had each other.”

“‘Had’… I hate that we wasted those years in between,” you whisper.

“Don’t be. The years got us here. To when we could finally have each other… again. It’s not too late if it’s the right way, the right time....”

“Let’s go back to that party,, hmm?” he says after another hug, “I’m already excited to introduce you as my fiancé.”

“And then we'll leave and talk some more. I’m not wasting a single moment of my life from now on, Kim Namjoon.”

“Of course…,” he smiles. “We’ll leave and… talk. The talking that results in the other thing we said would come with this deal.”

You pinch Namjoon’s still squishy yet firm arm before taking it in your hands as you walked back to the party, anticipating what came next.

Whether it was talking, Namjoon’s new definition of talking, hearing him introduce you as his fiancé, working with him, or even just the next minute by his side. It was the rest of your life. He was the rest of your life.

And neither of you could ever let this go. This was the love you’d both been searching for.

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jaythelay · 2 months

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I feel like TF2 had a really bad time in development hell for a while and the devs are just sick of it at this point. Stuff not working out, not making it to release, and simply put, not wanting to maintain any new ideas.

They had a medieval 2Fort and for the life of me, the only conclusion I can come to is they didn't want to maintain 2 separate experiences for the same game. MvM being a departure they...basically stopped work on eventually too. Hilariously, it being a horde-type game probably being what kept it going, much like with L4D from Counter-Strike.

Feels like alot of stuff at Valve just didn't work for a decade. and I think it's because nobody was forced to finish their work. And unfortunately that's just a simple aspect of creation that not everyone can handle, no restrictions. I imagine this also lead to people who did a lot of work, not getting full credit, or having their ideas superseded by essentially leaches who contributed nothing before, but have Their idea on how it should be.

That also would explain how the FUCK they canceled L4D3. What the fuck company doesn't get that shit finished one way or another? I can appreciate the freedom that Valve allows, but I think THAT should've been the moment an adult spoke up and said "This shit hasn't been working for literal decades."

I heard they stopped having as much freedom, and while on paper it was great, you HAVE to have restrictions in creation. Otherwise nothing gets done, nothing progresses, and nothing really even gets started past the initial planning process. The thing is, all we've seen is the broad end of both spectrums. One that doesn't work enough to get stuff out the door, and one that doesn't work either, but garbage at least gets out the door every week.

I'd like to see Valve just move a bit on that spectrum, not the opposite end in any way, just force people to Finish The Work they started. Like Left 4 Dead 3 for example. I can't imagine most people in the division that grew were happy that some idiots fucked all their work up entirely. I also, would have fired the idiots who wanted to move L4D3 to fuckin' Unreal or whatever. God damn morons don't know what company they're working at. Want to know the answer? You keep it on Source 2 because I wouldn't fucking buy it if it was on another fucking engine. No confidence in your own engine also paints a VERY poor image of literally EVERYTHING about the company, their engine, their work culture, god what an embarrassment.

Seriously though, I think people should probably chill on the "savetf2" stuff. I don't think that's gonna inspire anyone there to work on it anymore. Just kinda...annoy them that they can't say "Guys this was HELL to work on and almost nothing got out the door but cosmetics, failure after failure to get anything else out the door. We're tired, it's nearly been 2 decades. We aren't planning on shutting down servers or anything. Just keep playing if ya want to."

I'd much prefer a TF3 because I'm curious how they'll handle it. But I severely doubt we'll ever see another Valve big name title again. Which sucks shit, but what can ya do. The credit we can give, is outside of taking down TF2 clones they really don't need to take down, is that they at least allow people to do whatever the hell they want with their IPs. Do you think Valve was ever gonna make HL2VR? Honestly. Doubtful. The only reason Half-Life got an update is because of the SteamDeck, otherwise, that update would never have happened. They aren't interested in going back to Source anytime soon, they're jumping to Source 2.

Now there is a possibility they come back to other titles to give it the SteamDeck treatment, but I have high doubts of that either. HL was a blatantly obvious choice and Valve not having it work well for their own hardware is actually unconscionable. L4D is the embodiment of that meme with the skeleton under water, Portal doesn't really need much.

So I put forth a question I've pondered: Why is there even a Valve? It's not called ValveVR, nor ValveDeck, it wasn't a Valve Machine, or Valve controller, and Valve hasn't released a (good/playable) game since the 360 era. An update/total revision for Counter Strike is simply expected when it's their only real game success in years. So, otherwise, why is there even a Valve? Seems like they'd just morph into Steam by now. I also think it'd quell the fires of people wanting more games and updates.

I'd rather them NOT quit making games outright, but...like man, I've been playing L4D since I was at least 12yo, Half-Life since I was 3-4. I've been waiting. They've had the time to tell us what they're doing and thinking, them not telling us, feels like it's because they themselves don't even know or it's a total shit show. But when they do actually know what they're doing, they come out with confidence. Hardware and Steam has been their only confidence in decades. I'd rather have an answer to whether or not these IPs are genuinely dead, than have that carrot hanging in front of me anymore. Sure, I can ignore the carrot, but it's still there.

I think nearly 20 years is enough time for Valve to comment on...just...anything people have questions for anymore. I'm kinda sick of guessing what is even going on over there. This isn't a hate-post or anything, just a grouchy old man yelling at the sky sorta thing you've seen a million times before, just probably on the opposite spectrum of the main discussions. I don't want an update for TF2, I want an update on Valve. Not Steam, not their hardware, not specifically their IPs, Valve themselves, what the hell is going on over there.

#Valve #Steam #Half-Life #Portal #Left 4 Dead #IP #savetf2 #team fortress 2 #tf2 #l4d2 #l4d #HL2VR #Half Life #Half Life 2 #Half-Life 2 #I have more to say but the main point is of all the things Valve has left us totally in the dark about #it's been Valve #we're pretty sure about everything else in comparison

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legion1227 · 3 days

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Invincible Season 2: Review.

Let's hope the wait isn't as long for season 3.

The first season of Invincible caught the world by storm in 2021. A genuine addition to the superhero TV medium that separated itself from its peers with exceptional storytelling, a memorable cast, a sensational collection of voice actors and actresses, and copious amounts of blood and gore unseen in other superhero shows, animated or live-action. (Except for maybe fellow Amazon Prime Original, The Boys.)

Two years later, on November 3rd, 2023, Invincible sophomore season picked up where the first one left off. The first episode showcases Mark Grayson, our super-powered 17-year-old known as the titular Invincible, trying to shoulder his responsibility as a hero after the ass-kicking of a lifetime by his father Omni-man, which left countless across the world dead.

What can I say about this season that hasn't been praised for already?

Let me get some of the negatives out of the way. There aren't a lot. There are some moments when the animation, mostly when characters are idle and having a conversation, where it looks odd. Sometimes, characters like Mark speak with other superheroes about crucial plot points, and they look a little stilted, where it's slightly distracting. The one other nitpick lies within the hiatus between episodes 4 and 5. Dropping four episodes weekly only to take a 4-month hiatus before releasing the next four episodes was an infuriating decision that killed the hype then. Regardless of the reasoning, I hope for season 3, there is no repeat of that. Did the hiatus hurt the quality of the remaining episodes? Absolutely not.

Mark's journey as Invincible this season was even more captivating after the traumatic events that transpired last season as he struggles with soooooooooooooooooooo much more. Forced to confront his father once more, other villains of varying degrees of danger, and the looming threat of more Viltrumites coming to Earth has Mark pushed to his ends beyond belief. Coupled with the attempt to juggle a relationship and go to classes regularly at college, you can see how Mark is stretched so thin. Steven Yeun's performance hasn't missed a beat as he captures the spirit of a growing teen going through so much exceptionally. And he's not the only one to hit a bullseye amongst the rest of the VAs. Sandra Oh, J.K. Simmons, Walton Goggins, Jason Mantzoukas, Khary Payton, Clancy Brown, Ben Schwartz, Sterling K. Brown, and the countless others that make up this talented cast brought their A-game to make every character sound earnest and purposeful. The writing was sublime throughout as character motives were established clearly and made sense, the dynamics heroes and villains alike had with one another were remarkable, and the action scenes were as stellar as ever.

There's almost TOO much to love. I loved in the first episode how the show edges you with when exactly the title card will drop despite everybody constantly setting it up with Invincible's name. I loved Ben Schwartz's alien character Shapesmith, and his bumbling presence throughout. I loved every scene involving Allen the Alien and the testament to the voice direction where for the first time in a voice role, I hear Seth Rogen voicing a character, but it's not distracting. I almost forget he's being voiced by Rogen at times. I loved the inner turmoil Omni-Man faced and the growth he experienced since the last time we saw him. Simmons's delivery of his final line in the last episode captured the sadness and regret perfectly. I loved every single fight scene. Period. Shoutout to Rex during his fight with the Lizard League because I haven't stopped thinking about how he held his own for weeks. I loved the little gags about the animation process or Mark's little interactions with Agent Spider or 'the guy who dresses like a bat.'

In conclusion, there's simply too much Invincible has gone in its sophomore season that WORKS. It's TOO GOOD. The writing, the animation (mostly), the voicework, the story, the characters...there's a solid reason why this is one of the best superhero shows out there right now. There are a few shows I'm watching right now that come close to the high quality it's reaching. I'm giving Invincible Season 2 a 4.5/5. Depending on how the rest of the competition fares throughout this year, this could be THE show for 2024.

#review #tv show review #tv review #invincible #invincible series #invincible season 2 #invincible spoilers #omni man

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thessalian · 8 months

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Thess vs Pronouns

Leaving off from the liveblogging for a minute ... let's talk ... gods, I don't even want to call them 'gamers'. I guess Gamers (TM) does well enough. Or TEH GAMERS, I dunno. Something suitably sarcastic about those who make gaming and toxic masculinity their entire personality.

So Baldur's Gate 3 comes out of early access and onto general release and TEH GAMERS start freaking out about the character creation menu. Why? Because pronouns - and how you can choose the genitalia of your character separate from said pronouns and overall gender presentation. Most of them are tearing their hair out about party members flirting with your character whatever gender you're playing and "feeling like they're forced to sex up men" and not understanding how just plain optional all that shit is. But there's still a certain air of, "Hey, at least we've got Starfield coming! Starfield won't go woke on us! Todd gets us! It'll be okay!"

And then Starfield also lets you choose your pronouns separate from gender presentation. And the freak-out redoubles. They bitch moan whine about how "Bethesda's gone WOOOOOOOKE!" and how it's disgusting and why would they do that and blah.

I'm just trying to figure out why the option offends and scares them so much.

Like ... you don't want your character to bone a guy? Just ... have your character say they're not interested. It's fine. Never comes up again.

As to the pronouns ... well, I mean ... just ... match pronouns to gender presentation, and then never think about it again, maybe? If you're getting wildly, hair-tearingly offended by the character creation screen, over one little option that need never be considered again...

I mean, it's ludicrous, honestly, the mental gymnastics they do. Like, someone said, "Well, they need to know the pronouns. What are NPCs going to call you?" and the response was, "...Our name?" Now, I don't know if Starfield sticks you with a generic character name. But in games where they don't stick you with a character name, say like Baldur's Gate 3 ... how the fuck much coding and voice acting would it take to include every single name that has ever been, especially those that people just made up because that collection of syllables sounds good, and implement it in dialogue? And even then, we don't use people's names at all times when we're talking about them. Like, Hawke is Hawke. So when NPCs and companions refer to Hawke, that's the name they use. But there's a reason that DA2 never refers to Hawke by their first name, despite being able to choose it at character creation - not even their family! You get "Brother" or "Sister", Gamlen sticks with, "That troublemaker of yours", and Leandra sticks with pet names. Either way, whether your character has a standardised name or not (like "Hawke" or "Shepard", or a title like "Warden", "Inquisitor", or "Pathfinder"), eventually you're going to get to a point where NPCs need to use a pronoun because no one uses someone's name repeatedly in conversation when a pronoun exists. And TEH GAMERS would just freak out if people used "they/them" for their precious character. Because "MORE WOKENESS", when that's literally all we have to refer to someone whose gender is unknown or uncertain.

Plus it's the hypocrisy that gets to me. For decades I've been hearing these people be all snotty about those of us who are tired of playing YAGWD in every single damn game, and long for character creation screens. They're all, "Well, playing it is optional" and "ARTISTIC VISION" and all of that.

Well, TEH GAMERS? Playing these games is optional for you too. If having more options in character creation than you are personally unwilling to use upsets you so fucking much? Maybe this game isn't for you. I don't pretend that games studios, AAA or not, are actual friends and allies. But they're seeing where the money is and going for our cash instead of yours. They don't need your cash. If you think the gaming industry is dying by becoming more inclusive? Then do what you always tell us to do when we're begging for scraps of representation - either tolerate the way the gaming space is now, or leave it.

You want to play a MANLY MAN? Then go ahead! That option still exists too! But please for the love of fuck shut up about pronouns. EVERYTHING HAS PRONOUNS. Gendered beings have gendered pronouns, so your MANLY MAN has fucking pronouns, okay? Most of us would say your pronouns are "he/him" but I personally think your pronouns are "ass/hole". Now take a breath, put on your big boy undergarments, and either put up with there being options that aren't there for you, or leave. There's the door.

#Thess plays video games #Thess gets aerated

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kookies2000 · 1 year

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Disney tries to make a sequel, everyone hates it already.

Dreamworks plans a sequel, Shrek 5, Kung Fu Panda 4, and wanting a Puss in Boots 3 and Bad Guys 2, everyone is hyped and dying of waiting!!!

And I fully understand why.

Sequals (Essay because there's a lot of sequels to talk about)

Disney was never the type to serialize their films. Heck, most of their films are stand-alone films because of the fairytales they're based on. You can't exactly make a series out of Cinderella, Snow-white, Beauty and the Beast, etc, without changing a few things from the original. Disney tried and let me just say that Cinderella 3 was most likely their only good sequel. And that's because they retold the story of Cinderella. Even redeeming one of the step sisters. As for the other sequels that Disney has planned or made, 50/50 for me. I'm not looking forward to Frozen 3. Frozen 2 was good until the third act. Elsa just pushed Anna away again, and instead of it being this bad thing, Elsa is rewarded for it. She gets to see her mother and gains an improved version of herself. While Anna struggles by herself. Yes, Elsa did "die," which could've worked as character development if Elsa realized that pushing Anna away was the cause of that death. But no, Anna unites the spirits again, and Elsa comes back to save the kingdom and all it good. There isn't really a punishment for Elsa pushing her loved ones away. Anna was the one with the best development because she had to grieve and push forward without Elsa. And she grew into a better version of herself that way, earning her crown as queen. I can see why people liked the ending, but to me, Elsa really should've reflected on what she did to Anna and Olaf at the end. It's just a little detail that made the film fall flat for me. Toy Story 5.......... what? The first three are masterpieces, really, they are. The 4th was definitely unnecessary, but I liked it as its own stand-alone film. Like a bonus film, a reboot to a possible new chapter for the franchise. But the way they ended it, they separated Woody and Buzz. Bonnie just straight up left Woody behind. I get it. There were hints that Jessie was gonna be her new favorite toy, but Woody should have some value. Yes, I know the film was about Woody accepting that he is no longer in the spot light and must pass down that title to someone else and his new chapter in life doesn't include his old friends. I get it. That happens in real life, too. But a 5th film? How are they exactly gonna do it with the way the 4th film ended. It doesn't seem very possible. Plus, it's not like the 4th film lived up to the first three, I still think they made Buzz a little out of character. And the old toys were underused. Like they could've evened out the roles a little more instead of letting Buzz take the spotlight. The same with Wreck it Ralph. I'm not going into detail about this. The sequel was pretty bad. I get it. Ralph is insecure and doesn't want to lose his only friend. But to put her in a life-threatening situation to get her to stay with you? I'm pretty sure you could've just said you were feeling lonely without her. That was too big of a drastic measure. I know that wasn't his intent, but the writers might want to have rethought about that. Ralph was just a bit too much of a jerk, and the product placement was kinda too much. Cars 2.......... it's a guilty pleasure of mine for a reason. 🤣 Incredibles 2, I thought it was good, but I can see why people have issues with it. The villain didn't make that much sense. The only sequel I am looking forward to is Zootopia 2, and that's because that story has a lot to offer. I'll explain later.

Dreamworks sequals, oh boy, where do I begin!!! Dreamworks serialized their films at the very beginning. Did you know there were at least six El Dorado films planned? If the first film didn't flop, we could've had a whole franchise of the treasure hunting trio. Or the fact that before Shrek was released, they were already working on a Shrek 2. Dreamworks make their films with a franchise in mind. They planned ahead. And each squeal they made only added more and more to their characters.

Shrek 2, Shrek has marriage problems because his in-laws are baiscally racist towards orgers. Shrek 4, he learns to love his life again. I will not mention Shrek the 3rd because that movie should disintegrate and never come back to reality. 😅 And I'm hyped for Shrek 5 because there is still more to write about. The film takes place in a fairytale land. There's hundreds of fairy tales out there that Shrek can make fun of. Hence, more films. The concept itself opens up new stories.

HTTYD. I haven't seen this one, but I know enough. I love the idea of Hiccup growing up and learning something new every film. Finding his mother, dealing with the loss of his father, dealing with being separated from his best friend at the end. Each film gave a new element to his story. A new gain and a new loss. I can't see the film going beyond three films, though. Unless it's gonna be about Hiccups kids, they kinda closed the book, and the concept isn't very open to anything. Unless a new threat comes and Hiccup has to learn to be the new village leader. Which he kinda already did. So I'm glad there isn't a HTTYD 4 planned.

Kung Fu Panda. This franchise has 6 films planned since the very beginning. SIX! And they always add a new element to Po's story. Earning the Dragon Warrior name, finding inner peace and dealing with his PTSD, becoming a teacher and chi master. And there's still more to Chinese culture that can be added to this franchise. The concept opens up the franchise to new ideas. The number of characters they have adds to the story. We got Shifus back story, we got Po's back story, we got Oogways back story, and the fandom is now expecting Tigress's back story soon. The concept and the characters are the reason why this franchise is loved and why we're dying for the 4th film!!!!

Madagascar. Fun fact, Madagascar 3 was, in fact, not the final film. 😅 Yeah, shocking. After the Penguins of Madagascar in 2014, Madagascar 4 was supposed to be released in 2018. So they did plan more films but got delayed with Kung Fu Panda 4 and Puss in Boots 2 because of the reconstruction of the studio. How many more films? I think the 4th one was supposed to create a reboot situation. I have no idea how the story is supposed to continue. I really don't, but at the same time, I do. The first three films had one story. The three wanted to go home to the zoo. Each film took place in a different setting, with each character learning something new about themselves. In the first film, they learned how to be in the wild, just like animals in Madagascar. Second film, they reconnect with their African roots. 3rd film, they realize what they really want is to see the world, so they move in with the circus. In Europe. That's why the sequels worked. Different settings = different discoveries = new story. Yes, their story about getting to the zoo is over, but we can't forget about the situation their in now. They're traveling the world now. The point of Stefanos and Gias character in the 3rd film was that the two were tired of staying in one place. They did the same acts to the point where they lost passion and meaning. They wanted something new and to improve the circus. And now that they have that, new stories can be told. In other words, the new concept opens up a door to a new story. They can travel the world and discover new things and new characters. New culture and even back stories to new characters. As far as I remember, Vitaly has a father like relationship with Gia and Stefano. Why? What's their past? Or we can get new pasts from new characters to come from different parts of the world. The concept of a circus traveling the world is what opens up the door to new stories.

Trolls, I know people don't like this film, and I agree it's for a much younger audience. Like 8 and under. But I can still appreciate the franchise for it's story telling. Poppy has to learn to be queen before becoming queen at the end of the film. She had to learn where happiness comes from and how having others you love in your life can improve on that happiness. Trolls 2, she had to learn about being a good queen. And I do love the metaphors they used in the 2nd film. Using different kinds of music a metaphor of tribes at war with each other. Poppy learned that it was her kingdom that caused the war in the first place. She had to learn that she can't push her own culture onto the other tribes because you can't just think your culture is superior. Like she wanted to make the country trolls happy with her own music simply because she believed the country trolls music was the wrong way. Which makes me love her interactions with Coopers family so much. Learning that her kingdom tried to erase the other tribes culture by replacing it with theirs. That her tribes scrapbooks are just cutouts and glue ons by the winners to rewrite history so they feel comfortable with it. And I love that the king and queen of funk explain it to her. That differences do matter, and no, we are not all the same deep inside. Our culture, our lives, and our experiences are different, and they make us who we are. Harmonizing with different cultures is what makes a good queen. And that's why the sequels work. Why I'm excited for my little sisters to see the franchise. There's so much you can do with a story about a queen trying to do good for her kingdom. And YES, I know Frozen is the same. Like I said, I did enjoy Frozen 2. It's just that the third act fell hard on its face. Like, why is ice the 5th element and not love? There are little details that really made it flop. I can understand Trolls being kiddy and cute because they are made for children and babies. I would much rather have my sisters watch Trolls than Coco Melon any time. I appreciate Frozen for what it is as well. Loved the films, wish it reached its potential and that's why I'm not looking forward to Frozen 3.

Are there any DreamWork films that would work as a franchise? Yes, Megamind can learn how to handle being the towns new hero. Bad Guys, this screams franchise!!! It's like Suicide Squad. Former criminals help to save the world!!! Puss in Boots. Puss, Kitty, and Perrito are three out laws going on adventures. How many new adventures can you write for them to go on? HUNDREDS!!! And this is why I'm excited for Zootopia 2!!! That story DOES have something to look forward to. The concept is great. A cop and a former criminal fighting crime together? HELL YEAH!!! That's why Toy Story worked, too!!! The life of a toy is creative. They watched their owner grow, and each stage of their owners life affected them. When a kid moves houses, they can lose toys on the way. What if a toy gets broken? What if the kid is no longer a kid? What do toys feel about being lost or replaced. The concept is incredible and leaves tons of opportunities to continue the story or create new ones. So I'm a 50/50 on Toy Story 5.

Conclusion

Disney doesn't plan ahead when they make a film. They clearly start to make it up as they go with no plan. DreamWorks does plan ahead. A lot of Disney's concepts don't work for sequals. I can not see a squeal to any of the Disney princesses. Bell? Ariel? Cinderella? Not really much to their story except they lived happily ever after. It's a closed book for good unless they take a Cinderella 3 route and rewrite their stories. Dreamworks do have concepts in their stories that open opportunities. And the #1 reason why we don't get excited about Disney squeals. Reputation. Disney has a horrible reputation when it comes to sequals. Dreamworks have a perfect record. As long as we burn Shrek the 3rd from our minds. Not talking down on Disney. I know they have the ability to create great classic stories. But only stand-alone stories. While DreamWorks has a gift in making franchises and taking risks in their stories.

Ps. SHREK 5 IS OFFICIALLY ANNOUNCED!!!!!

#Disney #dreamworks #sequels #movies #shrek 5 #can't wait to see Shrek #but what I'm really excited for #is seeimg my favorite Spainard and his Mexican wife and Mexican bestie

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sihtricfedaraaahvicius · 10 months

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post the names of the files in your wip folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them, and then post a little snippet or tell them something about it! tag as many people as you have wips.

thank you for the tag @sylas-the-grim!

You guys have folders and titles? Wait… you guys have half written stories????? Okay… so… I have a lot of time on my hands, some of you more or less know why that is, so I spent most of my days writing. Almost all fics, and their separate chapters, have been written within one day. So I usually have no half works for my ongoing stories, as I just sit down and let it flow out. BUT, I have two wips right now because they are on "hold" as I am going through my requests.

So… the only wips I can give you are:

Mechanic part 4 & Halloween part 3. I'm so sorry lmao. (not including one request I am handling in between fics because the topic is sensitive to me, and I wish to only release it when it's fully done :) which will be soon!)

again, I really suck at tagging and I'm not sure who here writes fics right now so ehh...

@st-eve-barnes @whitedarkmoonflower

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zappmannstuff · 17 days

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The sweet indulgence of Homestuck

Ok bitches buckle down cause not only did i make some cool art for my Homestuck versions of PMD ocs, i also made LORE. So clench those buttcheeks tight, sit down and listen

So first of all i changed their names to something more fitting

Ichabod > Ikabod

Zachary > Zakary

Yamato > Yamato

Musashi > Musahi

I am VERY smart. But even though i'm smart, i will keep using their PMD names for simplicity sake

So here are some ideas and concepts i thought for them

Yamato and Musashi

The idea is that they are sort of 1 person split into 2. They were one grub and grew into two separate people.

They are gold bloods, meaning they have psychic powers. Or rather, they are supposed to. Out of the two, Yamato is the only one who has psychic powers, Musashi has none. However, Yamato can't see and Musashi can. So, he uses her as a conduit for psychic powers of sorts, as she is able to direct them towards a specific point. Yamato can use the psionics on his own of course. But since he can't direct them anywhere, he just ends up releasing bursts of psionic energy, which can be fatal to the ones in close proximity.

Yamato and Musashi are very close together. Inseparable almost you could say.

As ancestors my idea was that their bodies are forcefully joined into one, allowing them to reach their full potential. The power of family <3

Also i wanted to give them the ancestor title "The Conjoined" but it' ONE letter away. i guess if i do "The Conjoins" i could get away with it

Ico

His theme is that he is sort of a guy who is a slave to his instincts. He is impulsive and acts first before thinking much, much later. He hates his status of a low blood, and is trying to use the powers of radiation (or as he calls them, glow rocks) to change his blood color. Which at one point he succeeds at. Because of an unfortunate incident involving his glow rocks, his blood mutates into candy purple. It only gets more difficult for him to control his emotions after that.

In the ancestor version my idea was that after he mutates, he completely loses control of himself and just becomes a mindless creature with a desire to devour anything in it's path. That leads him to eating the Gl'bgolyb itself and acquiring its powers. In a way, he does fulfill his dream of becoming more than his lowly blood status, as many end up seeing him as a god afterwards. His title is "The Devourer"

Zach

He was going to have hair but I've been persuaded not to give him any. And honestly, it's a good thing. Zach being bald is one of his universal constans. Speaking of which, when Zach was first a Minecraft oc, his backstory involved him being stuck in the End. Then after i brought him into PMD, he was stuck in the Twilight Taiga (courtesy of PearSquare). So figured that for Homestuck, he could be stuck in the Outer Ring, giving him very close ties to the Horrorterrors.

So he's kinda a cannibal. And i feel like due to his relation with the Horrorterrors, he would definitely go grim dark during the session.

For his ancestor version i was thinking that he could be sort of a cult leader. He basically becomes a spokesman guy for Ico and worships him, thinking he was sent by the Horrorterrors. I imagine he was the one to who had joined Yamato and Musashi's bodies together.

His title would be "The Seamster"

Okay those are all the ideas i had, dont ask me what their typing quirks are, see you in another post. Happy Homestuck Day bitches.

#oc #original character #original design #homestuck #homestuck oc #homestuck day #4/13 #tw: blood #tw: gore #tw: body horror #zach #ico #yamato #musashi

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ddixons-angel · 9 months

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So, the Daryl Dixon spin-off trailer was released yesterday and AMC+ on Prime Video released the first 10 minutes of the first episode of the new series. Honestly, I am super excited about this, it reignited my love for TWD and Daryl (not that it really went away) and it actually motivated me to write.

For the first time in months, and I mean MONTHS, I was able to write something (it's the outline of the chapter but still something) for Fated and I'm extremely happy to announce that it is STILL HAPPENING. Fated will finish with all 3 seasons left and...

I will be CONTINUING Fated with Daryl's spin-off as the main driving storyline. Now, I have NO IDEA where that's going to go, obviously because we know nothing about how Daryl got to France or what he's really supposed to be doing there, BUT I will do it. how long will this take me, God knows, but it will happen Seriously though, even when the first trailer came out on YouTube, I already had my own ideas of what the hell to do but as it stands, it's most likely going to go in between Gloria and Daryl's perspectives (take that however you want to *cough* they may be separated *cough*)

Of course, as I write the rest of Fated, I may or may not release some other things like oneshots and miniseries (depending on how long these spurs of inspiration/motivation last) but hopefully I do so you guys can have something to read as I'm working on the rewrites and such.

TL;DR - I'm not dead, Fated Seasons 9 to 11 and Fated 2 (obv working title) will happen and I'm motivated to write so yay!

Stay tuned for more fics from me because I'M almost BACK

#rambles #author's notes #about fated

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dollarbin · 3 months

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Shakey Sundays #9:

Eldorado

Neil Young permanently separated himself from every other 60's era white male musician in a single rage-filled, screaming stomp in late 1988. In true Shakey style that moment was initially only available on CD in Japan.

His screaming separation from all things Mick, Bob, Van, Eric and Stephen occurs halfway through Don't Cry, the second song on his Japan-only EP Eldorado. There's plenty of hints that the moment is coming: the first track, Cocaine Eyes, features the most violent and frantic, dying-fish-on-a-line, guitar Young had played up to that point in his outrageous life, and the first half of Don't Cry, including its initial guitar solo, delivers more of the same.

But nothing can prepare any of us, even 35 years later, for what occurs at the opening of the second solo, seconds after the 3 minute mark.

Behold:

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Neil Young was not much of a screamer before that moment. When it was time for intensity he tended to turn on his wind machines and do all the freaking out through his guitar, Old Black.

But I'm here to argue that the scream at 3:04 in Don't Cry is vital to the Neil Young story; it's a culminating moment prior to, and necessary for, real catharsis, a moment when the totality of one's anxiety and angst overcomes the sufferer, leaving them with no recourse but naked terror and rage.

Most of us experience such moments privately. I've definitely screamed in a parked car my fair share of times, every muscle in my body contorted and swelling; but the windows have been rolled fully up and I've been away from my coworkers, my family and my cat when it happened. Afterwards, nothing has changed in a practical sense, but I've felt better, already on a path back to reasonableness, and glad no one other than me witnessed the wild strain of it all.

Neil Young had plenty to scream about in 88: he had two children suffering from Cerebral Palsy, one of whom could not speak or walk because of it; he'd spent nearly a decade in creative turmoil; plus he'd recently made a record with Stephen Stills. A lesser human would have just suffered or given up; a normal human would have been private about it all; after all, his suffering is none of our business.

But the greatest of humans turn their suffering into art that selflessly guides the rest of us long term; they provides us a pathway from suffering to heavy love, and that's what we get immediately after Don't Cry: Heavy Love races through its chord progression, head down and chasing after more of that surging power, and we get a full dose of it in the first solo, introduced again by sonic slamming:

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And then, at the song's end, before the second solo, Neil loses it altogether as he chants "my heavy love". These are some of the greatest vocals Neil has ever laid down. He's so utterly alive in these songs, so vibrant, barring his brave soul.

The title track, Eldorado, which opens Side 2 on the recently released vinyl version I've got in my own Dollar Din (that's a funny typo I just made; I think I'll leave it in...), allows Young to spin the narrative outward after all the personal risk taking on Side 1. He's got a Latin-tinged tale of drugs, bad guys and bullfighting for our consideration. It's totally awesome; Neil plays a different style of guitar here than anywhere else I can think of: he transforms his previous record's blues posturing into some sweet gringo flamenco, all of it slick and sharp after the bubbling chaos he's laid down beforehand.

But the song contains the EP's raging spirit all the same; listen to the unhinged explosiveness in the middle of the fourth and final verse. His eyes are screaming blue; his hair is red as blood!

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It's telling that when it came to his next full record in 89 Young wavered: Eldorado was naked, raw and risky; was it too much? Did he need to hold back? Unsure after a decade of commercial failures, Neil listened to his co-producers; he shaved off the most terrifying an reckless moments in Don't Cry, tabled Cocaine Eyes and Heavy Love altogether, and balanced the rest of the album out with simpler, safer sounds.

The resulting record, Freedom, is a masterpiece. But it's not Eldorado. What is?

Happy Sunday everyone. I hope none of us need to pull the car over at any point today to do any screaming. Neil is ready to do it for us.

#neil young #shakey sundays #stephen stills sucks #Youtube

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coconurt · 1 year

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What I want to save, I'll try

pspspspsps turtle enjoyers, come get your Casey/Leo angst :3

~2k, rottmnt movie spoilers, cw for blood, mild language, angst, and destruction (title from a twenty one pilots song hehe)

thank you @owlfacenightkit for being my writing buddy <3

~~~

Casey stumbled, numb and haunted, through the burning wreckage of what was once a thriving city. Unshed tears stung his eyes, yet refused to fall. He clutched the key against his armored chestplate like the precious reminder that it was.

His last conversation with Leonardo replayed over and over in his mind.

"Just tell me when you're home free, and I'll pull the plug!"

"Casey, listen to me. When I get to the other side, you close that door."

Raph had tried to chime in then, to convince him not to go through with it, but it was useless. Sensei knew what he had to do, and he was fully prepared to give everything he had, everything he was, to save them.

"Leo, please! I can't lose you again!"

"Hey. Future me would be real proud of you. I'm proud of you."

One aimless footstep after another. One step. After another.

"Casey! Close the portal NOW!"

One foot... after the other...

Leo had begged him, then.

"Casey, PLEASE!"

And he... he'd done it. He'd pulled the key. Closed the portal, stolen from his loved one any chance of a safe return. And for what? To save the world?

... Of what good was a world without his sensei?

Those would be Leonardo’s last ever words to Casey. To each other.

He'd never even gotten a chance to say goodbye.

And then, to make a horrible situation worse, Leo had turned the communicators off as soon as the portal closed. That was really it. His friend, his teacher, his everything was gone forever. Doomed to die separated from his family, trapped alone with a monster, just so the rest of them could live.

And it was all Casey's fault.

Something ahead of him caught his eye. A glint of silver, hidden among the rubble. His beloved weapon slipped from his grasp and clattered to the asphalt.

Leonardo's odachi.

He stumbled forward and fell to his knees. Gingerly, reverently, he picked it up. His image was reflected back to him from the face of the blade, his gaze exhausted and teary, and Casey broke.

Bowing his head, he finally let wave after wave of raw emotion wash over him like a tsunami. Heartbreak, anguish, grief, all of it unstoppable and suffocating. Huge sobs wracked his body.

Eventually, he became vaguely aware of two more presences joining him, falling into place alongside the ghost of his mentor. April and Splinter spoke to him, did their best to soothe him, but it was no use.

He barely heard their words, barely felt their gentle touches. All he knew, all he heard was a single word, repeating over and over in his mind like an awful mantra.

Gone. Gone.

Gone, gone, gone.

~~~

"Leo?..." Raph asked, his voice barely louder than a fearful whisper.

The three turtles huddled around their fallen brother. He lay spread-eagle on the hard asphalt, his face bloodied and bruises already forming on his scales. To the three non-injured brothers’ horror, several spider-like cracks were clearly visible on the front of his plastron, and they all had a sinking suspicion that if they rolled him over, they would find more on his carapace.

At Raph's voice, Leo cracked his eyes open and attempted a reassuring smile.

"Hey," he said softly, then tried to lift his head and take in their surroundings. "Eww, are we in Staten Island?"

A wave of sweet relief washed over his brothers all at once.

"COME HERE!" they chorused, lunging forward to scoop Leo into a bear hug.

After a moment, Leo let out a soft groan. "Guys... too... tight-"

Startled, they released him, all of them stammering apologies. Gently, they lowered him back down, and Leo winced at the movement.

"Leo, I dunno what you were thinkin', but you scared the crap outta us," Raph started. "Never, EVER do that again, do you hear me—?"

As if on cue, Leo interrupted his scolding by starting to cough. And cough, and cough. With one hand covering his mouth, he rolled onto his side slightly, his chest heaving and struggling for breath.

"Leo...?" Raph asked again, any previous sternness forgotten. He reached out and laid a hand on Leo's shoulder in an attempt to be comforting. "Leo, you good?..."

After a moment, Leo's coughing fit trailed off, and he laid his head back with a wheeze and a groan. Absently, he lifted his hand and frowned at the specks of blood on his palm.

Silence fell over their little group. Mikey stifled a gasp and clapped his own hand over his mouth. Raph could only stare, horrified. But once the initial shock wore off, Donnie, ever the quick thinker, jumped into action.

"Leo, talk to me, where else are you hurt?" the purple-banded turtle demanded, stepping into his role as the family's interim medic. He grabbed his brother's wrist and tried to check his pulse, but Leo snatched his arm back.

"I'm fine, Doctor Donatello," Leo insisted. "Just hook me up with a handful of painkillers and a nap, and I'll be good as new."

"Cut the bullshit, Nardo," Donnie snapped. "You look like crap and you just coughed up blood two seconds ago. Now tell me, where. Does. It. Hurt?"

Leo stopped struggling and fell silent.

"Leo, please," Raph insisted. "We can't help ya if we don't know what's wrong."

Leo looked down, his expression unreadable. Finally, he spoke up.

"Chest. My shell," he admitted quietly. Gingerly, he touched a hand to the back of his head. "Think I hit my head pretty hard, too..."

The three turtles stiffened. Mikey looked close to tears. Leo... never voiced how much pain he was in. Not during training, not on missions, never, not even if they asked. If it was bad enough for him to admit it now...

Donnie tore his gaze away from Leo and typed a few commands into the computer panel on his wrist. "We need to find April and Pops and get you back to the infirmary. Leo's in no shape to portal us, so we'll have to hoof it. Raph, can you bring him, please?"

"On it." Raph shifted to one knee and prepared to pick Leo up. In typical Leo fashion, though, the slider swatted him away.

"I'm not a hatchling, Raph. I can walk myself back to the lair," he insisted.

"Oh yeah? You wanna walk by yourself?" Donnie sat back on his heels and crossed his arms. "Alright, let's see that."

Leo huffed indignantly. Moving slowly, he gathered himself and by some miracle, pushed himself off the ground. He swayed once, twice. Then, to no one's surprise, his knees buckled. Raph lurched forward to catch him before he could hit the pavement.

Donnie leveled him with an unimpressed glare. Leo looked away, uncharacteristically sheepish.

"Yeah, okay. Maybe I could use a little help."

~~~

Casey dutifully trudged along behind April and Splinter through the ruined city streets, but all he really wanted to do was lie down and crash.

He'd finally managed to stop crying, now. He knew he should feel embarrassed over letting the turtle's sensei and human friend find him in that state. He was all too aware how costly a display of emotion like that would have been on the battlefield, but he couldn't find it in himself to care. His eyes were swollen and sore, and his entire body hurt now that the near-constant stream of adrenaline that had been keeping him going over the last 24 hours had tapered off.

"Let's try up ahead here, guys," April called, her voice hollow with distraction. She wasn't doing much better than Casey, but was obviously trying to keep it together for their sakes. "I'm pretty sure I saw the guys land near one of these piers."

Splinter murmured his assent, and Casey didn't respond. He merely continued following the girl like some sort of enormous duckling, his head down and gaze absent.

His unchecked grief over losing his mentor had settled into a comparative numbness. He knew he'd have to start processing his emotions eventually, but right now, he knew the best course of action was finding the remaining brothers (his stomach lurched at the thought) and figuring out what to do next.

Suddenly, he was yanked from his thoughts by a gasp and a strangled shout.

"Guys!— LEO?!"

Casey's head snapped up. Up ahead, three (no, four) figures slowly made their way towards them, their bodies mostly obscured by the dust rising from a nearby collapsed building.

It was— it was them, it was the brothers, they were alive! Battered and bruised, their silhouettes backlit by the sliver of sunrise tinting the smog orange, but alive.

And right there, carefully supported between Raph and Mikey, was Leo. His usual smile was absent, and Casey could see a small trickle of dried blood running from the corner of his mouth, but it was him, he was alive, how, how was that even possible— ?

"Blue! My son!" Splinter shouted. Casey's two companions took off at a run, throwing themselves at the slider, who let out of a grunt of protest at the impact.

Casey, however, remained rooted to the spot, eyes impossibly wide and mouth agape. His mind screamed at him to move, to go to him, to do something, Leonardo was alive, but his body was completely frozen.

He stayed back at a respectful distance as the mismatched family enjoyed an emotional reunion. He wanted to join in too, to pile into the grouphug and hold them all as tight as his aching arms would allow, but he couldn't seem to move his feet.

As it turned out, he didn't need to. Before long, the Hamatos began to make their way back towards him, April switching out with Mikey.

As they approached, Leo looked up. Casey locked eyes with him, and his heart skipped a beat. Thoughts that Casey didn't realize he'd even get the chance to have flooded his mind. Oh my god, he's alive, this is impossible, god he must hate me, he has every right to, I almost killed him, what am I going to say-

And then Leo smiled. Actually smiled at him, like he was just as happy to see him as Casey was to see Leo.

"Hey Case," he rasped.

"Sensei?" Casey breathed.

And that did it. All at once, Casey broke out of his stupor. Rolling onto the balls of his feet, he closed the gap between them and threw his arms around the blue-banded turtle's neck.

"Sensei, you're alive, you're okay, how-" he sobbed.

Leo chuckled, the sound sincere but pained. "Ow, Case, not so tight..."

Casey flew backwards, stumbling over an apology. "Master Leonardo, I'm so sorry, I- you're injured, here, allow me to help..."

"Casey," Leo said, interrupting his ramble before it could even get off the ground. Casey's mouth snapped shut and he stood at attention.

"I'm not mad at you, a'right?" he offered kindly. "You did good."

And just like that. The words that Casey didn’t even realize he so desperately needed to hear more than anything. An incomprehensible weight lifted off his chest, and tears flooded his eyes. Overcome by a thousand emotions with no words, he managed a small smile and a nod in response.

"Alright, now that that's out of the way," April cut in. "Would someone mind explaining to me just what the hell happened?!"

"April, you're never going to believe it! I used my mystic hands to save Leo!" Mikey chirped.

"Your mystic what?"

As the siblings started to piece together for the others just what had transpired to bring Leo home safely, Casey tried to keep up, but his brain refused to keep pace. There would be plenty of time to share stories later. For now, he was just happy to fall into place right where he belonged, the seventh link on the family chain, as they walked home victorious, the sun at their backs and a new day ahead of them.

#rottmnt #my fics #my writing #rottmnt leo #rottmnt casey jones

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