#true freedom is found only in God

[tabernacleheart]

Whosoever, He said, commits sin, whether Jew or Greek, rich or poor, king or beggar, is the servant of sin. O miserable bondage! ...when wearied with the hardness of his tasks... whither does the slave of sin flee? He takes it along with him, wherever he goes; for his sin is within him. The pleasure passes away, but the sin does not pass away: its delight goes, its sting remains behind. He alone can free from sin, Who came without sin, and was made a sacrifice for sin. [With these truths,] Christ purposely alarms us first, and then gives us hope. He alarms us, that we may not love sin; He gives us hope, that we may not despair of the absolution of our sin. Our hope then is this, that we shall be freed by Him who is free. He has paid the price for us, not in money, but in His own blood: If the Son therefore shall make you free, you shall be free indeed. Not from the barbarians, but from the devil; not from the captivity of the body, but from the wickedness of the soul. [Now] the first stage of freedom is, the abstaining from sin. But that is only incipient, it is not perfect freedom: for the flesh still lusts against the spirit, so that you do not do the things that you would. Full and perfect freedom will only be, when the contest is over, and the last enemy, death, is destroyed. Do not then abuse your freedom, for the purpose of sinning freely; but use it in order not to sin at all. Your will will be free, if it be merciful: you will be free, if you become the servant of righteousness.

Saint Augustine of Hippo

#this is absolutely vital #jesus christ #True freedom is found only in God #Righteousness #saint augustine #John 8 #the truth will set you free #salvation through jesus christ #Salvation #conversion #repentance #Sin #Slavery to sin #the terror of sin #do not despair #Free will #spiritual warfare #fight the good fight of faith #John 8:31 #Christianity

[celesterayel]

midnight secrets | luke castellan

pairing : luke castellan x nyx!reader

request: can you write about luke and a daughter of nyx? <33

IN WHICH — he knows only one true thing: you put all the stars to shame.

"now I just wanna stay here and fall into midnight. Want nobody else now, only you, feel right" - a.

w.c. 1.9k

warning(s) : soft ゜✭・.

✩ ‧₊˚ author's note can you tell when I was younger I had fallen in love with the night and the idea of it? cuz I did. very much so, I'd say. also water, always loved the concept of it--the fragility and softness of it, like a balm against my skin.

long, long ago you learned of the sea of stars and their stories, from which rose their beginning and end. the stars were beings of heat and fire; they were beautifully mortal and alive.

they danced upon the domain of zeus; showering the sky with lights when night fell and befitting the world with their glow.

but as the sands of time bade the next and the corners of the sky dulled, the toll of living and breathing became too much. and so in the vast space of nothingness among the empty silence, the stars took on the duty of protecting a human and god: following where they might go, to every lifetime and universe as if they could erase the tragedy of the divine that swam through their blood.

and when each stars’ child died and their soul followed its ache to finally rest, the star would fall out of the sky in a blazing trail of destruction and divinity to taste freedom one last time and meet them in the next life.

there had been something raw and gruesomely alive about the stars when you learned of the story and so everyday, you’d trapeze the mortal line between night and sleep to watch them in absolution. you yearned to find an answer as to why? why would such immortal and imposing celestial beings like the stars willingly ruin themselves for us humans, for us beings that hungered for war and found pain like a symphony?

you learned your answer when you met luke castellan, your own tragic star who would follow you when the blood of the gods stopped flowing through your veins and your existence came to its calamitous end.

you had spent most of your life curiously confused as if there was something missing that made you feel broken; a piece of the puzzle that made drizzles seem like hurricanes and everything seem like an unsolvable mystery, constantly itching at your skin as if you just needed to pull back the layers and scratch.

and then, one day it stopped.

the buzzling in your head faded and you seem to finally just be.

luke castellan was the rain before the storm, the pain before the raw scream; every fatal, holy thing that meant absolution and destruction in the same manner. a price you were willing to pay if it meant loving him.

and you did–love him that is. every part of you ached with love for your golden boy who had weathered storms like they were his prison and had wanted like it was a fatal wound that might never heal.

you first met the golden castellan boy nearly a year after coming to camp where you were claimed to be a child of the night and stars, the goddess nyx; an absolution of divinity that you would be every dark, enchanting thing he would know. you were the only thing that would allow the hurt in him to finally cease its dance and just allow him to simply be.

while the blood of the gods flowed through your veins, the peace only night could bring was your cover. it was every paceless sleep spent at the docks praying to your mother for one more star to keep its dance, it was heaven and heartbreak in the same measure.

when both man and monster fell to slumber, it was the knowing that eventually everyone would cease their dance sooner or later.

people would watch you like you were a painting come to life as the moon basked you in waves of starlight and the forest came to life in your presence. when the night grew tired of its waiting and the stars lost their way, it was you coaxing them back to life to the restlessness all beings underwent.

you were a creature of presence and peaceful destruction, misfortune and desire–every loud, unsaintly thing the brown-eyed, dimpled boy had thought.

and he was your exact opposite: bold, bright and charming like the sun. it was as if hermes had threaded gold through his veins and ichor had poured forth to create whatever celestial thing luke was. a type of burn only the sun could bring when you went off to your death.

the night had settled upon the camp long ago and so nothing but the loudness of silence and pensive dreams continued its echo. except for the child of the night and her sun who seem to find balance between the bumbling and the glow of the soft moon.

luke grabbed your hand and threaded his fingers, clutching you tightly as if you’d disappear with the breeze and never return.

he guided you to the docks where the river reflected back the divinity of the night sky and lapped gentle waves against the shore. you sat side by side, silently basking in the quiet.

breaking the silence, he asked, “what’s wrong?”

what was wrong? you didn’t quiet know. there was just a sort of cloak of discomfort that had settled over you that you couldn’t seem to shake off.

“do you ever wonder what’ll happen next?”

you settled his hand in your lap and grabbed it like it was a lifeline, tethering your aching body back to the living when all you wanted was to fade. he only rubbed the back of your knuckle, soothing the skin and the bone-deep itch all at once.

you turn to gaze at him, and suddenly you were jealous of the moon and how it shined so beautifully on him like it was made for him to bask under.

he turns to look at you, “before no. now…every moment, i begin to think what makes us so different from humans that we suffer tragedy while they can live how they please and without the cruelty of the gods. I think about what will happen when i finally pass on from this life to wherever my soul may go.”

you don’t think you could handle leaving this world after him. it was a type of pain that would kill you inside out, you decided. you knew it.

there is vulnerability in him that speaks out, “and then i dream that none of that matters because someday you and i make it out of here. out of this place and away from gods and monsters.”

you only grab his other hand and the one you currently have trapped and place a kiss upon each of the palms, embedding all the affection you have for him in that moment. it is something so humanely lived that the world stops moving and the gods see a love for the ages.

he plucks you up from his side and merely places you in his lap, wrapping you tightly in arms like there is no war spreading and reaching it’s claws from the horizon toward the two of you.

you simply close your eyes, soaking in the boy who's holding you like you are a divine being.

“open your eyes and show me the stars, pretty girl.”

all he can think is the moon and stars, which you've fallen in love with so many times has nothing against you. and suddenly your staring the biggest star in the face, wondering if in another life you were the moon and he was the sun king.

but when he kisses you, you realize no. he is simply the star that will follow you when your bodies turn to ash, being picked up by the breeze. and there is only the secret that luke castellan would allow himself a thousand years of destruction if it meant following you where ever you go.

you two are simply a star and his love.

#luke castellan #some poetic shit here #im doing mind games with yall #percy jackson #percy jackon and the olympians #pjo fandom #pjo series #luke castellan x reader #percy jackson show #annabeth chase #luke x reader #luke pjo #pjo x reader #pjo tv show #percy jackson x reader #percabeth #sun and moon myth #greek mythology #percy jackson series

[bardic-inspo]

Dhampir Dreams

Pairing: Spawn Astarion x F!Tav (Generic/Unnamed)

Part 1 of 2

Rating: Explicit (Smut)

Key Tags: breeding kink, pregnancy kink, body worship, light dom/sub, light bondage, light praise kink, blink-and-you’ll-miss-it dacryphilia, cunnilingus, PIV, Astarion’s past trauma, smut with so many feelings but nearly no plot, character introspection

Summary:

Tav saw beauty in Astarion he couldn’t have seen himself, even if he had a reflection to gawk at. She made love with a man who never thought he could have anything near it. Made all his red dreams come true, and then said: go on, make new ones, in whatever color you like. Astarion never thought about being a father. Not before her. Or: an angsty-turned-horny character study about the pale elf and his thoughts on creating new (un)life.

A/N: This is my first stab at writing a more generic Tav. Tav in this piece is AFAB and uses she/her pronouns. Most other identifying features are left out.

Click here to read on AO3 instead

Astarion’s never thought much about making another vampire.

In the rare moments the notion occurred to him, he shoved it to the far back shelf of his mind so as not to waste himself on an exercise in futility. What did it matter, after all, while Cazador still lorded over him?

More than anything, Astarion yearned to see Cazador’s blood spill. In his mind’s eye, he’d watch it pool across the floor, not unlike the way he'd seen so much clothing puddled at so many heels. The lake he’d make of his master would be wide enough to swallow the garments of all who’d stripped bare before Astarion. Every sweat-soaked night he found himself bound to another moldering mattress beneath someone else’s weight, rocking through the motions that left his stomach sour, he’d fill his mind with such sweet dreams as Cazador’s death.

Whether Cazador would allow Astarion to drink his blood before being relieved of it varied with the fantasy. The dream changed as often as the hands on Astarion’s hips. It mattered little to him whether Cazador’s end came with true vampirism or not. As long as he ended. 

As long as the vile river of shit that comprised Astarion’s life ended, one way or another. For better. Or for good.

Of course, he flirted with the fantasy of his own spawn, sent out like skittering spiders to dispense his will. Foul little monsters they would be. Fine tools to have in his arsenal; Astarion would only want such wretches of his own the way one might want a hammer to pound a nail. And what he wanted didn’t hold any weight while bound in Cazador’s chains.

So the idea recoiled into the dusty recesses of his mind, collecting cobwebs kitty-corner to such out of reach trophies as freedom from his servitude to Cazador and the sun itself. Both still gleamed, despite the tarnish of time and hope rusted over. Despite Astarion’s prayers, no heroes came to save him. No gods or slayers or saviors spared him from his servitude. 

Until the illithids did.

Despite everything -- the centuries of torment, the hollow where his heart should be, its silence in his ribcage, the scars on his back, the thousands of other lashes that Cazador let fade from his porcelain skin -- Astarion did the one thing Cazador could never.

He stood in the sun. And on the sands of that same beach, another miracle washed ashore. A contradiction. His counterweight to everything else he’d ever known.

Tav.

Astarion’s hands roam the supple shape of her nestled against his bare chest. Her breath crests and falls soft and rhythmic, like the gentle slap of waves against the cliffs where they first found each other. His darling is always so serene in her sleep. Astarion dips his head down, nosing her splayed hair on the pillow, drinking in the lovely scent of lavender that always lingers with his lover.

Often, he wakes before her, as he does now in the dim blue light of dusk. Not yet dark enough for him to step outside, but for the moment, there’s nowhere in the world he’d rather be. Not even in the raw, rippling light of day.

The smell of her has his eyelids heavy again, the steady patter of her heartbeat hypnotic in his head. His hands curve over the flare of her hips before slipping beneath the hem of her tunic. He stifles the satisfied hum that bubbles in the back of his throat as his palm smooths down the lithe stretch of her stomach. He resettles with his nose in the crook of her neck, eyelashes grazing the twin puncture scars that mark her as his.

He’d thought, once, that he’d ascend and have her at his side for an eternity. He was scared. Frantic. Grasping. He thought he had to grasp at something, fashion some sort of tether, to have her. Thought he had to have power, and enough of it, to keep her. Now he holds her every morning in the bed they share, until day becomes night again. It’s as effortless as blinking.

Now, the thought of turning Tav into a vampire turns his stomach.

His lips brush, tender, to the flutter of her pulse in her neck. He loves those marks he gave her. He loves the way her fingertips tap against them when she’s lost in thought. He loves the way she arches into his arms as he feeds, the way her body gives and gives to him alone. That sleepy, slap-happy smile she has when he’s lapped his last for the evening. The way her eyes roll back, and she gasps, breathless, as he kisses a trail from her neck to a nipple and sucks fervently.

He loves that he’s marked her, but that it didn’t change her. He can still curl into the heat of her skin at night. Still watch her preen in a mirror. Still stare at those gorgeous eyes and know the shade of them is hers. Her cheeks still turn the shade of sunrise when he leans in with a lustful whisper, or grazes her waist with a feather-light touch.

Absently, his fingers follow the path of an old scar on her stomach. At its end, he finds the start of softness. Astarion loves that, too. She didn’t used to be soft there, when they were just surviving. They’re not just surviving anymore.

Perhaps he’s changed her after all. It’s not so scary anymore to admit she’s turned him, too. Not to the light, or anything so nauseatingly righteous. But rather, so Astarion could see himself in it. Even if his days of standing in the sun are done.

I’ll be your mirror, she vowed, what feels like another lifetime ago. She smiled in that fond way of hers that, at the time, hurt to look at too long. He scoffed at her poetic ruminations on his hair curling near his ears. The creases when he laughs. 

Tav saw beauty in him he couldn’t have seen himself, even if he had a reflection to gawk at. She made love with a man who never thought he could have anything near it. Made all his red dreams come true, and then said: go on, make new ones, in whatever color you like.

Astarion never thought about being a father. Not before her.

He’s thought of Tav as a mother before. It flitted through his mind when Astarion watched her ease Arabella’s pounding heart with the gentleness of her own. That feeling lingered when Yenna joined their camp, and Astarion caught Tav teaching her cards. Combing the snarls from the girl’s hair. Coaching her in the basics of swordplay.

She’d be a wonderful mother. Astarion has no doubts in that regard. And he, well…

He doesn’t have an example to look back on, or one to look up to. But he has his compass. Tav’s heart beats, sure and steady, in his ear. That sound’s guided him through so much else. How could he lose his way for long, if there were two pitter-patters to listen to? 

His palm paints cool over that blooming softness in her stomach. An ache burns in his own. The sort of hunger her blood won’t sate. Would she taste even sweeter, he wonders, with her body rounded and swollen? 

Of course she would. So hard to improve something so perfect already. But she’d be radiant, if she were ripe with their child.

And after, when their babe is born, and her body is new all over again, he'd love every line, every fold, every mark that came from their coupling. He’d worship every part of her that was remade by the two of them to make the three of them. Marvel at the way the same body that first truly fed him would feed their child, too. 

He’d help her find her way back to pleasure in her own way, in her own time. Just as she did for him. His Tav gives, and gives, and he’d give her anything, everything, for the rest of his days, if a wretch like him would be so stupidly blessed to be the father of her child.

Astarion pulls a breath between his teeth, his nose flooding with her floral scent again. That would change, too. She’d carry new notes in her sweat, in her slick, in her blood, while carrying their babe. Astarion wants to taste them all, to learn what songs she can sing while he does.

Instinctually, he presses to the plump of her ass to soothe the building stiffness in his cock. He plants a muted hum in the fabric of the pillow. His groin throbs to the thump-thump of his compass, beating oblivious beneath her ribs.

He pictures pouring into her, night after night, his spend spilling in little translucent rivers down her slicked thighs, overflowing from her cunt. Too much for her to hold in, but she’d take him as long as it takes until life sparks inside of her. Tav’s determined in all her undertakings. Resilient. 

And in his dreams, she’s pliant. Pleading. 

“Star, please.”

She’s trembling in that slinky, translucent nightgown she wears to bed sometimes. The one that hardly hides her skin, but cloaks it in a delectable, silvery sheen. He likes it too much to ruin it. Or at least, he has every other night. 

Oh, he’d like to ruin it, now.

Tav’s pupils are blown black with want. Sweat shimmers on her skin, spurring his tongue to swipe his own lips. Her shoulder peeks bare from her nightgown, and Astarion can see her pebbled nipples, dark beneath the sheer silk that separates them. Hardened with hardly a touch. A feeling he’s intimately familiar with. His cock twitches as he strokes the back of his hand over the soft swell of her breast. 

“Aren’t you sore, sweet thing?” He tries for tender, but it comes out coarse. Rough like the way he wants to grip her hips.

“So be gentle,” she says with a sultry smile, lips peeled apart and glistening just enough that Astarion can’t peel his eyes away. “I know you’ll take good care of me.”

Astarion slinks forward, crowding her against the edge of the bed. Careful, like cradling glass, his palm reaches out to cup the side of her cheek. She sighs into the touch, the curve of her smile reaching the heel of his hand.

“Always,” he says reverently, before his voice sinks to a growl. “You’re always so, so eager…for me.”

Her lashes flutter low over hungry eyes. All it takes is one little wordless bob of her head for Astarion’s own hunger to have the best of him. With a lazy roll of his wrists, he shoves her back with kind but firm force. The mattress bends with her impact, her breathless laughter nearly lost beneath the whine of the wooden frame. Astarion crawls after her, hands fisting in her nightgown, and pulling her free of it.

And then, she’s bare beneath him. Writhing from his tongue and teeth. Gasping out the best words he’s ever heard. Astarion downs them like a man starved, kissing her with the kind of fervor he thought reserved for bloodlust. But her lips, the promises they pour, are sustenance all on their own.

“I’m yours,” she whispers, “all yours. Always. All of me.”

Astarion can’t stifle the whine that drags from some hollow in his chest he never knew about before.

The bed creaks as he hitches one of Tav’s limber legs up over his shoulder and nips a path of sharp kisses from her ankle to the crux of her thigh. He pauses, sweeping a feverish gaze over the spread of her: legs parted in his grip, that perfect slit, already wet with want, the rest of her sprawled naked across the bed, at his mercy, at his desire, at her own. 

He leans down, tongue dipping leisurely through her cunt. Always, she swore. So there’s no hurry in how he takes apart the woman he loves so dearly, in one of her favorite ways to be unmade. No matter how many times she claws the sheets and hisses, “Please, Star. F-fuck, I need you inside of me.”

It turns something in the depths of him to hear his own name said as a prayer. It makes him want with a force and harshness stronger than any thirst he’s felt for blood. He wants to turn her. Change her. Forever, for good. For the life they could make from their bodies, bound as close as souls could be. He wants to see her swell with the love they make, with all the love he’ll leave inside her.

She’s so close, her legs quaking violently when her hand tangles his hair and yanks his head upright. She’s beautiful, flushed ruby red, taking her air in shallow doses. Her eyes burn with equal measures adoration and reproach.

Astarion smirks, unrepentant, lips smeared with devotion. “My love, any work of art takes time. And that’s what we’re making, you know. When others look upon our progeny, they will weep in the sight of such beauty.”

“If all it takes is time, dearest,” she says, with a smile just as filthy, “then I don’t want to waste one second of it lying here empty.”

“Mmm,” Astarion sighs, nosing down against her throbbing clit, eyes flashing back to hers as he dares another lick. Her fist tightens in his hair. Astarion only chuckles. 

“You’re right, of course,” he croons. “That won’t do, at all. I do recall promising to-- how did you put it the other night? ‘Fuck you full and senseless’? I’m more partial to what you begged me for a tenday ago, when I had you face-down and waiting for me as soon as the sun was set. Remind me again, my love, what you said when you weren't gasping my name?"

Astarion presses the tip of his tongue to her clit again and tastes her rapid, ravenous pulse in the heat of it. Tav’s hips jerk in response, but he holds her fast.

“I-I said I want-- that I want--”

“You want me to ‘breed you like a damn animal’," he finishes for her. "Oh, don’t be shy now, my sweet. We’re far past that. And we want the same things, after all. But," he sighs, letting his lips drag through her flushed folds, "I've another promise to keep, first.”

Astarion flicks his wrist, muttering magic beneath his breath. Tav’s sharp little yelp of surprise shoots heat straight to his groin. His cock throbs as she settles again, arms bound above her head by his mage hand, tits bouncing from the slightest struggle against her restraints. She smirks up at him, eyes aflame with fresh desire. Escape is the farthest thing from what she wants.

“You lie back now, dear,” Astarion drawls. “You’ll take me soon enough. You’ll be so good for me, like you always are, and take everything I give you. And I’ll take very, very good care of the woman I intend to make a mother.”

Astarion watches her keenly, tracing his forefinger down through her slick. He unfurls it, circling her cunt daintily, and watching her writhe for even the faintest promise of friction. He’s not sure if it’s his mercy or his selfishness that readily discards the thought of keeping her here, just like this, for the rest of the day. She’s mesmerizing, with the way her back arches from the blankets, and how her body strains towards any touch he’ll spare her. 

All mine, he thinks, with a smile that makes him feel weightless. He grounds his hardened cock against the edge of the bed, groaning. All yours, darling. Just for you.

Pride rumbles low in his chest as he sets his mouth back to work again and knows she can’t cover her own. There’s no muffling his name pouring from her lips. No hiding how she cries for him. Her whole body winds taut, shuddering with every stroke of his tongue. 

Finally, finally, he lets his finger slip inside her. Astarion sighs into a satisfied purr, letting the tremble of it soak into her sex. Her cunt’s a vice around his knuckle. Every pump of his finger feeds the building burn inside him, fanning the ache to be sheathed in that tightness. He only aches more, feeling her squeeze around his finger, and knowing she longs for him just the same.

He slips in a second finger to join the first, feeling her spread and then clench anew. Astarion ruts aimlessly into the mattress, in time with the thrust of his wrist. The head of his cock weeps anticipation with the rogue tear trailing down the side of her cheek. It’s only pleasure that makes her cry.

There’s only love in her heavy-lidded gaze as she pants, “Please.”

Mercy, then, Astarion resolves. For both of them.

Her thighs quiver against his ears like leaves in a breeze. Astarion swirls his tongue against the bud of her clit and sucks tightly. Tav stiffens abruptly. His arms hook firm around her legs as a shattered sound breaks from her throat,and a hard tremor courses through her hips. 

He holds her through it, pinning her to the bed until just the faintest brush of his lips has her shuddering. The start of her plaintive whimper has him easing back. A murmured word sets her wrists free of her restraints. Her heart still hammers, sumptuous, in his head, as he peppers her legs in kisses soft as velvet.

“Beautiful,” he whispers with each one, slinking up her body while she comes back down. “So, so beautiful.”

He thinks of new life, as his knee bends between her thighs and drags her open all over again. He thinks of the graveyard, where he had her freely beneath the stars, in the dirt where he woke centuries ago. He thinks he’d be happy to die again, this way, as he slides forward and buries himself inside her waiting heat.

Astarion grates out a long, low moan as he basks in the wrap of her arms and her cunt. Dimly, he feels her fingertips threading gently through his curls. He thinks of sunlight on his skin again as he sinks in fully, bracing his arms on either side of her head, letting his forehead tilt against hers. He can feel her pulse thrumming through her body, through his cock, through his fogged-over thoughts. His hips roll to the sound, as if it beckoned him to motion. Tav’s head drops back into the pillows. She lets out a long, contented hum, while her body rocks in time with his.

“Is this what you needed, darling?” He huffs a laugh, catching her lips in chaste kiss. It’s enough for her to taste her own sweetness. And one squeeze from her cunt is enough to cut his breath away all over again. 

“I think you needed me, too,” she purrs.

“Y-yes,” he stammers through bared teeth, his throat tied taut as she wrings him for all he’s worth. “Yes.”

She knows exactly what he needs, what he yearns for. He needs her, needs this, needs to see his seed seeping from her fucked-out hole, pink and puffy and leaking. He’ll know the rest of it was spent so deep inside her, her fertile womb is flooded. That’s his, too, with the rest of her. 

Hips high for me, beautiful, he’ll say, when his last thrust is done. And he’ll hold her legs up against his shoulders, kiss her heels, and slip the pillow beneath her pelvis. Just to be sure it takes. 

It’ll be another couple months before they’ll start to see the fruit of their efforts. Until Tav starts to bloom with it. And then, he’ll be hard pressed not to have his hands on her every hour. Cupping the fresh heft of her breasts as they grow with the passing days, heavy from him, for the babe growing in her belly. He’ll soothe her weepy eyes and tits alike, with a skilled tongue and sweet whisper. Rub her shoulders to ease the new weight her bones carry. Draw his nose down her neck and smell not just her, but himself, and the consequences of what they did, right here in this bed.

Feel her change beneath his hands and feel so fucking proud to be the reason.

Pleasure winds, binding, around his cock, and he feels that hunger snap its jaws around him all over again. His hips snap with it, jerking frantically. I need you, all of you, he thinks, and if he weren’t already fucking her, he’d be on his knees, begging for all he’s worth. Her cunt quivers, and he’s lost to the grip of her. Astarion shoves his own knuckles in his mouth to stifle a strangled cry. 

“Star?”

Astarion rips awake in a sweat. He sees familiar wooden beams above his head, above his bed. Sunlight streaks the floorboards, leaking from behind the curtains. Turning his cheek, he finds his lover peering at him from over her shoulder, concern wrinkling her face. Tav still lays on her side, and Astarion still presses against her back. But his hand clamps tight to her thigh, bare where he hiked up her tunic. And his cock twitches fitfully against her ass, unspent and painfully hard. 

Just a dream, then. For now, at least. 

He lets out a long, weary sigh, slumping back into the sheets. Tav tilts her head, the worry in her gaze gradually dissolving into a mischievous gleam.

“I thought you might--” she starts, snickering, “but you were having sweet dreams, weren’t you?”

“The best I’ve ever had,” Astarion mutters mournfully as he buries his face in his pillow. “You were there, of course.” 

Astarion rarely sleeps anymore. It’s not normal, not natural for an elf. But it was a trick he taught to dodge Cazador’s torment at least for a few hours a day. Reverie used to mean putting the horrors on repeat. He’d slowly eased from the habit, now that he has new memories worth seeing a second, third, or hundredth time. 

Still, occasionally, he drifts to sleep without meaning to. Sometimes, he wanders off into novel nightmares. Or, if he’s lucky, he dreams of making love to his wife and making her pregnant. Of making their own little dhampir.

His hips shift, and he hisses. Pre-cum seeps from the head of his cock, slickening the shaft. It’s not enough. Not after such a succulent fantasy. But one touch from his darling might have him sated, if not entirely satisfied. Pleasure stabs, sharp, through his groin as she shifts and brushes him with her motion. He grimaces. 

Just one touch alone could do it.

“I’m here now,” she smirks, twisting to face him. Her hand slips down between them. Mercy, he thinks, as her fingers wrap his length. He thrusts into her palm with a pleading whimper. “Tell me all about these dreams of yours.”

A/N: If you're yelling "Let him breed!!" at the screen just know I'm right there with you holding a megaphone about it 💜

If you'd like me to add you to a tag list for future one-shots, or all of my future BG3 fic (including multi-chapters), leave me a comment and let me know which you'd like!

If there's interest (from others & myself) perhaps there might be a part two where Tav takes matters into her own hands. Makes him say exactly what he wants, if he wants to have it so bad 👀

EDIT: This is now officially a part one of two 😉

& HUGE thank you to some lovely Discord and Tumblr friends/moots who cheered me on as I worked on this one! 💜

Tag List: @wilteddreamsofbaldursgate

Banner credit to @cafekitsune

#astarion #astarion ancunin #astarion smut #tavstarion #astarion x tav #tav x astarion #astarion breeding #bg3 #bg3 fanfic #astarion fanfic #astarion x f!tav #f!tav x astarion #my writing #baldur's gate 3 #baldur's gate

[ronwestbreeze]

you're gonna go far | 9

pairing: jake sully x neytiri x tsu'tey x fem!human! reader summary: a scientist arrives on pandora (unwillingly) a year after the exile of the rda. now she must deal with the likes of a clan leader, a great warrior, and a thanator rider. word count: 6.3k warnings: mentions of suicide (not explicit!)

read on AO3

Tsu’tey remembered when he first came back from death.

It was like clawing out of the ground and feeling as though there was dirt filling his lungs. He remembered Arvok hugging him and crying into his shoulder when he found him awake. He remembered his father sitting nearby and quietly thanking the Great Mother for this second chance, for this mercy, even though they didn’t deserve it. He remembered his mother calling him a gift and that Eywa favored him, that he was the true and chosen Olo’eyktan to the People. Like he was some type of god that Eywa created herself.

He remembered feeling so horrible that his mother didn’t even see him as her son anymore. But a god of sorts. An idol to look to.

Someone so perfect that no one, not even a demon or the daughter of a “simple” Tsahik deserved his attention or praise.

The People celebrated once they learned that Tsu’tey had survived the battle, even when all the odds were against him. In a way, they looked to him as some sort of god too. Not to the extent that Artsut did but idolized him, nonetheless. Tsu’tey remembered feeling frozen as if he were turned to stone, hardened into an empty vessel.

He didn’t feel like himself. He just felt exhausted.

All. The. Time.

And no matter what he did, that exhaustion or feeling of wanting to sleep for a long, long time, never left him. He was just stuck in this state where he was both living but half buried in the ground.

It wasn’t until Tsu’tey confessed to what he was feeling to Jake who then put everything he felt into words that he could not—still couldn’t—quite understand.

“It’s a common thing we humans feel,” Jake explained once when it was just the two of them in the middle of the night.

Sitting in a tree, watching a lively celebration far below. That world seemed so far away at the time. And it was then that Tsu’tey felt like the god his mother praised him to be. Disconnected from the world that he so cherished but watched over them with a protective heart.

“That exhaustion, truthfully, that probably won’t ever go away. This depression can wear us down until all we want to do is sleep without worrying about waking up. Living doesn’t feel the same anymore. Almost like it’s a burden to both you and everyone around you. And then comes the exhaustion.”

Tsu’tey stared at Jake, both thoughtfully and to memorize every detail of the dreamwalker’s face. “Have you felt this?” It was the predictable question at the time. He seemed to know exactly what Tsu’tey felt, so much so, that it sounded as if he lived through—still went through this experience.

Humans were as peculiar as they were dangerous. They hid their feelings. They didn’t allow themselves the freedom to feel as if someone or something was holding them back. They were often birds trapped in a steel cage when the way out was right in front of their face.

That was a certain observation one would notice if they paid close attention. Tsu’tey paid Jake a lot of attention. Memorized his micro-expressions. Noted the way he hid behind an impenetrable wall with a single window he only allowed certain people to look through.

It’s what Tsu’tey imagined loving Jake would be like. Finding ways to climb over that wall to embrace that lonely soul on the other side.

Which was why he was keenly aware of the fact that Jake never answered his question. But instead said, “Many people don’t always have someone to keep them above the surface. That is why most end up drowning forever until they fall asleep. It’s okay to feel these things, even if they’re hard to acknowledge. And if you need to talk, I’m always here. I’m too human not to help you, even if you don’t approve of me.”

While Jake’s words were somewhat flowery and cautious in delivery, there was Neytiri, who grounded him with her very blunt words.

“You are not a god. You are Tsu’tey.”

She did not see him as a god. And he was grateful for that.

Perhaps that was why he so easily fell for her after the war. Or, rather accepted his feelings after forcing them back because of his guilt with Sylwanin.

You did not see him as a god.

And he was relieved by that.

Yet that relief would soon be buried beneath the horror of something else he saw whenever looking at you.

It was himself.

Half alive. And half buried in the ground.

And Tsu’tey had this strong urge to start digging at the ground with his bare fingers. Until his nails were filled with dirt. Until his clean skin was dirtied. Until they bled.

He owed you that much.

“That demon did this!” His mother, Artsut hissed while she knelt next to Arvok’s sleeping body in some form of protection. She stared up at him, pleading, desperate, and angry. “Will you let that creature run free like you did before? Look what that thing’s done! She’s hurt your blood! Be Olo’eyktan and exact punishment on the ones that hurt your family!”

“Reeds didn’t do this.” His mate, Jake protested calmly—as calmly as he could when it came to Artsut. His arms were wrapped around him so tightly his muscles twitched whenever he moved, tail lashing behind him as he continued. “Arvok had already explained what happened. The Tipani warriors were going for Hell’s Gate. Arvok had tried to stop them, they got pissed and injured him—”

“And who’s fault is that?!” Artsut snapped viciously, eerily resembling that of a palulukan. “If that demon hadn’t landed here none of this would be happening!” She turned her fiery gaze onto Tsu’tey, her pleading becoming more adamant as she spoke. “You must kill it! This is your doing, you never should’ve let it live! And now our clan is in danger because of that creature—”

Jake scoffed, his tail swinging now, “You’d love that, wouldn’t you?”

Artsut hissed at him, “You do not deserve to speak, demon! I should have connived my son to kill you the first day you came to us—”

“Enough!” Tsu’tey hissed as he stalked forward and grabbed his mother by the arm.

“Tsu’tey—” She tried protesting only to be interrupted by his hiss.

“Be quiet, mother.” He led her out of his shared hut and went outside.

Once they were further away from the entrance, he let her arm go.

“My son—”

“No, mother.” Tsu’tey didn’t want to hear any excuses or laments that would make him feel awful for putting her in her place. “I’ve warned you and you’ve gone too far many times now. You are my mother, I do not wish to remove you from my children’s lives—”

She gasped and grabbed his wrist, “Do not be so cruel to your mother! You would prevent me from seeing my own grandchildren?!”

“You do not even accept the one son that I have!” Tsu’tey snapped but stopped when her eyes widened. He did not wish to shout. He did not wish for any more division. But she wasn’t making it any easier on him. So he continued slowly, “Jakesully is my mate. Neytiri is my mate. I will not allow you to keep disrespecting them. They are a part of my life, they make me happy. Shouldn’t that be what you wish for your own son? Do you not want me to be happy?”

Artsut scoffed in disbelief as if what he was saying were unbelievable, “Of course, I do. I wish for nothing but eternal happiness for my one and only boy—”

“I am not your only child.” He said gently, his heart falling. “Your son nearly died—”

“I know this! Do you think I do not know?!” Her eyes became glassy, her grip on his wrist tightening. “But know this, son. I do want your happiness. That is what any mother wants for her children.”

Tsu’tey watched her with a frown. He wished, he really wished he could believe her. Maybe a part of him did—wanted to. But he couldn’t help this unease in him whenever she was around him and his mates. He’d always feel her disapproval. No matter what flowery words she’d say, she would not change her opinion of Neytiri, Jake, Neteyam, and even their unborn little one.

But today he would not push any further. Today he was simply too tired.

“You should return to your home.” He told her and pulled his wrist free from her grasp. “Arvok will stay with us tonight—”

“Tsu’tey—”

“It is closer to the Tsahik’s where she can come and go freely to check on him.” He turned his back to her as the next words spilled out of his mouth like blood. “I do not want you near during that time. Or for a while. Not until I say you can come.”

There was a beat. And then there was sniffling. Tsu’tey refused to look at her. “You are abandoning your mother! You would do this to your own mother, who carried you for so long—” Tsu’tey ignored her words and ignored the pang in his chest as he forced himself to walk away. “It is that demon that has done this to us! They keep destroying everything we hold dear! If you will not kill it then I will—”

At that, Tsu’tey whirled around and stalked toward her as he spoke warningly, “You should be thanking Eywa that your son isn’t dead! You should be thanking our Great Mother that the demon had brought Arvok back instead of leaving him for dead! You should be thanking her that the arrow did not hit him but the demon instead! And yet here you are, plotting to kill Eywa’s favored!”

At this, Artsut scoffed, “Eywa would not favor a stain on her beautiful creation—”

“As Olo’eyktan I order you to stay away from the de…” He winced, not wanting to sound as venomous as his mother did. “—from the dreamwalker. I will carry out the will of Eywa as I intend to do. As this clan is intended to do. And because of that, she is under my protection now. She has saved my brother—your son.  She has earned this right. You will leave her alone.”

“And what if I don’t?!” Artsut shouted as Tsu’tey turned his back away from her and began stalking back to his hut. “Will you punish your own mother?! Will you kill me?! Tsu’tey? Tsu’tey, answer me! Do not turn your back on me! Tsu’tey—”

Her cries continued to ring in his ears, making him tremble.

He did not feel like a god.

He just felt like a failure.

Failure of a son.

Failure of a mate.

Failure of a leader.

He did not return to his hut.

You were lost. That was fine.

To be honest, you weren’t even focusing enough to go where you wanted. Frankly, you weren’t even sure how to get to your mother’s burial from here. All you did was wander around until you were far enough from the clan, until all you were surrounded by was forest until your legs gave out to the point where you couldn’t walk anymore.

There was a large leaf nearby, big enough for you to duck under it and sink to the ground as it covered your head from the rain. There was still a bit of daylight out, so you had more than enough time to stay there. Because getting back up was going to be difficult.

And you weren’t even sure if you wanted to keep going.

Your mother’s songcord was dangling from your hands now as silent tears spilled down your cheeks. You cried. And cried. And cried. And cried. And cried. Until you were hallowed. Until you weren’t sure if there was anything left of you at this point.

God, you hadn’t cried in so long.

You were dead. Your real body was dead. That wasn’t even your choice either. You had been poisoned, you died, and now you were in a new body.

None of it had been your choice. You didn’t want this. If you had the choice—if it were really up to you—you would’ve let the poison kill you. Anything was better than living in this hell where everything just seemed to be against you.

No matter what you did to make your situation better, something always came along and tackled you back to the ground, pushing you further and further until you began sinking again.

Death could’ve ended all of that.

But even that choice was taken out of your hands.

You could’ve done it now.

You could’ve gone back to Hell’s Gate, grabbed your knife, and…

And—and—and—

For a moment, your mind was quiet as you stared at your mother’s songcord. As you stared at the bone that ended the string.

You were a coward.

Something rustled a few feet away from you. Your body froze and considered the sounds around you. The rustling continued, drawing a little too close for your comfort.

With that, you ducked from under the leaf and moved away from the sounds.

Because even if you somewhat wanted to die, you sure as hell knew it wouldn’t be at the hands of a palulukan.

No. You were just a coward.

Dying took bravery. And you didn’t feel too brave at the moment.

All you could do was stagger forward until you found something to latch onto. To take you away from this until you felt brave enough.

Until then, you kept wandering through the forest. Letting rain pour onto your already wet and somewhat matted hair.

You tugged at one of the locks and hummed to yourself. You should do your hair.

At that, you kept going until eventually you found a waterfall. By then the rain had finally let up, the air was cool, and the smell of rain stayed with you despite the downpour disappearing.

It would’ve been calming if you allowed it to be.

The area itself was beautiful even in this dreary weather. You found a rock just a few feet away from the mainland and jumped onto it. Sitting down with your legs crossed, you leaned over the edge a bit, staring back at your reflection in the water.

Well, you supposed you looked as horrible as you felt. Your hair was one of the main things contributing to that. The braid that Neytiri made was still intact but the rest of your hair was just a wild mess. It was beginning to mat together and form dreads.

So, not particularly happy with the look and wanting a good enough reason to distract your hands and mind, you began doing your hair.

Diving into the waters wasn’t a good idea considering your healing injuries. Instead, you ducked your head into the waters. It was nice. Feeling the cool water against your skin, waking you up slightly. You would’ve stayed like this for a while and you did, considering you could hold your breath for a while.

The tension in your muscles relaxed and right when you were feeling yourself being pulled to sleep, something yanked on your queue, bringing your head out of the water and causing you to fall onto your back.

“Ow!”

“Skxawng!” You looked up only to regret it when you found Tsu’tey scowling down at you.  “What do you think you are doing?!”

You rolled your eyes and tugged your queue out of his grasp, “Obviously I came to drown myself. Congrats, you just saved the inconvenience.” Tsu’tey frowned, looking incredibly serious. You looked up at him and sighed, “I’m kidding. Do you guys not make depressing jokes now and then? Or is that only a human thing?”

He didn’t respond and you weren’t exactly waiting for one. Instead, you turned away from him and began parting your hair. You didn’t have a comb so running your hands through your thick curls was the best you could do for now. The best you could do at this point was take two strands and begin twisting them.

Tsu’tey appeared next to you, looming and watching you do your hair with a huff, “You’re doing that wrong.”

You glared, “I know how to do my own hair thank you.”

He didn’t move and you ignored him as you kept going with your hair. That was until you felt longer fingers wrap around yours and remove it from your hair.

“Hey—”

You felt his hands in your hair. Instantly, you went to yank yourself away from him only to stop when you felt his fingers move. It wasn’t rough or harsh, it was actually rather careful and precise. Any other day you would’ve shoved him away and told him to never touch your hair again but seeing as his braids were pretty neat and concise, you reconsidered.

Hell, maybe you’ve lost it. You were seriously letting Tsu’tey—the man who hated you the most—do your hair.

Maybe when you died you somehow went into a whole other universe. Yeah, that had to be it.

He was mumbling under his breath in Na’vi. You caught some words here and there like “humans” and “useless” a few times. But other than that his voice had been too quiet and quick for you to understand or at least translate some of the things he was saying.

Eventually, his hands disappeared from your hair. “There.” You watched as he stepped away from you to grab a bow from the ground, stretching his fingers, his face turned away from you so that you couldn’t see his expression.

You felt your hair to find some of it braided while the rest would’ve been left to mat together again. You tugged on it thoughtfully, perhaps you could let them turn into locs. It would be easier anyway. A lot more manageable considering you often forget to do your hair these days.

Next to you, Tsu’tey had also grabbed an arrow and approached the edge of the rock, pointing his bow down at a group of fish floating around the rock the both of you were on. You halfheartedly watched as the arrow flew into the water seconds later and hit one of the fish.

Absentmindedly you tugged on another braid as he went into the water to grab the arrow, “The Tsahik is looking for you.” He took the arrow from the water and yanked the fish off the tip. “She says you should not be up right now but resting. She is very upset at your disappearance.”

You didn’t respond. Tsu’tey looked back at you expectantly and you frowned, “So you came looking for me?”

A part of you was half-joking and half-annoyed when asking the question. You just wanted to be alone for a while. And dealing with Tsu’tey was the last thing you wanted right now.

“Yes,” Tsu’tey responded easily as he threw the dead fish to the spot next to you. You cringed away from it as he drew back another arrow. “And by the time I am done here, you will be coming with me to be checked by her.” You glared at the ground. A beat went by. “I will not take no for an answer. Your wounds are still healing—”

“Can we just, can we wait for a while?” You dropped your hands from your hair and into the waters. “I just—I need a place to breathe, okay? Back there, it’s just too suffocating. And I really don’t want to fight today. I’m too tired, so please…”

You didn’t look at him. But you did hear the arrow release and hit the water. Another beat went by. The waters slushed as he moved, “So you came here. For peace.”

It wasn’t a question but more of a statement like he understood it.

And reluctantly, you nodded in response.

For a while, you were quiet. Both of you. Tsu’tey grabbed the arrow and tossed the fish onto the rock. The water filled the silence, bringing you a sense of comfort in this long silence. You didn’t feel obligated to speak and Tsu’tey didn’t bother to conversate either. A big difference between him and Jake who would probably be talking your ear off with stupid jokes and infuriating jabs.

Not that it wouldn’t help a bit.

But right now, all you felt was exhaustion. Even Tsu’tey allowed himself to appear somewhat tired, at least from what you saw whenever his face was turned in your direction.

 “I thank you.”

You looked at him then, his back was still turned to you as he continued, “For saving my brother. Arvok. The arrow, he could have died if you hadn’t taken it for him. You—”

“Anyone would’ve done it.” You shrugged off, not wanting this type of attention. Especially not from him. What you did may have been somewhat heroic but you sure as hell didn’t feel that way. “You don’t have to thank me.”

“But I will.” Tsu’tey drew his arrow back again. The arrow flew again and hit another fish. “Even when I treated you horribly. You still saved him.”

You frowned and shook your head. His thanks for some reason made you feel worse. You didn’t know why but you wanted it to stop. “Like I said, anyone would’ve done it if they were in my position.”

“Hmph.” Tsu’tey tossed the third fish onto the rock and jumped back onto the rock with you. He grabbed the three fishes by the tail and nodded toward the forest, “Come, we should head back—”

“No.”

You heard him sigh, “Dreamwalker—”

“I can’t go back right now.” You blurted out, your hands clenching into fists as you glared down at your reflection. “I just can’t, okay? I can’t go back and face the pitiful looks Norm will send me. I can’t go back to Neytiri telling me that Eywa saved me or gave some fucking second chance that I had no say in. I can’t go back to hear Jake apologize over and over and over again until I go fucking crazy! I just can’t!”

You buried your face into your hands, not wanting to look at him, not wanting to face the world. All you felt, all you wanted to do was just crawl into a hole and hope that everyone left you alone. You hoped that you could lie down and become stone. You hoped you could become the tragedy that was amid the beautiful Pandora.

You hoped—You hoped—You hoped—

Something within your body told you that you were crying but no tears came.

Half alive and half buried.

Until they bled.

Something heavy landed on top of your head. It took you a moment for you to realize it was a hand—Tsu’tey’s hand. You dropped your hands from your face and frowned, reluctantly looking up at him to find him staring back at you.

God, these people were straightforward when it came to expressing themselves. Even Tsu’tey, who you considered the hardest to read out of the three.

“It is sad.” Tsu’tey squatted down next to you, his hand gently ruffling your hair. Your ears twitched, “I am sorry.”

You were taken aback, to say the least. Never in a million years could you imagine Tsu’tey out of all people, comforting you. Frankly, you never thought he felt anything toward you to enact such a strange reaction from him. And yet you didn’t move. Too afraid that if you flinched then he would take his hand away.

A part of you felt awful that he had to do this. And a part of you…

“You don’t have to do this.” You mumbled.

He huffed, “I do what I want. And I choose to be here. You saved my brother.”

“That doesn’t mean you have to comfort me.” This unyielding guilt was overwhelming, You almost wanted to shove his hand away. “I feel like I’m using you.”

“Then use me.”

You shook your head again, his hand remained firm, “You’re impossible—as usual.”

“Hmph.”

The both of you stayed like this for a while longer. It was getting dark. Creatures would start coming out soon. Perhaps you should stop being so stubborn and move already.

Tsu’tey didn’t say anything though. He was rather still and quiet. You looked over, for a moment wondering if he was asleep.

Only you found his yellow gaze staring at something intensely. Frowning, you followed his gaze.

Floating toward the both of you was an atokirina. Huh, you hadn’t seen one of these in a while. And even now they were still as pretty as you remembered them. Last time there were multiple, but this time it was one.

You stood and Tsu’tey followed seconds after.

Even for this, you remained still. As if moving would somehow scare it off. Tsu’tey must’ve had the same thought, standing as still as a statue next to you as the atokirina floated over your heads. The pure creature hovered over Tsu’tey’s forehead for a bit until it came over to you, tickling your nose.

Tsu’tey watched you and the atokirina in astonishment. It floated between the two of you for a moment before finally floating away.

You watched it in for a moment longer before your arm began to throb. Tsu’tey noticed you rolling your arm back uncomfortably and finally snapped out of his trance, “Is your arm bothering you?”

“A little.” You admitted reluctantly.

With a nod, he grabbed the fish and then the bow as he gestured toward the forest, “Come. We should return now. Mo’at is waiting.”

This time you did not protest. You glanced back toward the direction the atokirina disappeared before finally following after Tsu’tey.

When you got to Mo’at’s hut, she was already scowling at you. And surprisingly it was rather scary. So much so, that you unconsciously shrunk behind Tsu’tey so you wouldn’t feel any of her wrath. Jake and Neytiri were there as well, for what you did not know, but they appeared to have been waiting for yours and Tsu’tey’s return.

“Well, now we know you are well enough to foolishly run off.” Mo’at huffed as she pointed toward the spot on the floor. “Sit.”

Without waiting for you to respond, Mo’at dragged you to the spot and sat you down on the floor. Tsu’tey remained near the entrance and watched you silently. He hadn’t said anything ever since you started your walk back to their base. You wondered if he was at all bothered about seeing the atokirina. Or if it was on his mind at all.

While Mo’at wiped the dried mush from your arm, Neytiri squatted down next to you, “How are you feeling?”

“I died.” You said dryly. “Other than that, I’m swell.”

Jake sighed from his spot closest to Tsu’tey and the entrance, “Well, her snark’s intact. You sure she’s not back to normal?” You rolled your eyes, Neytiri rubbed your back while glaring at Jake.

“We saw an atokirina,” Tsu’tey spoke for the first time since you left the waterfall. “It came to the demon and I…” He said the rest of his explanation in Na’vi. You frowned, looking at Jake and Neytiri to gauge what exactly he was saying. You watched Neytiri’s ears twitch as her eyes brightened. Then there was Jake who looked completely serious, tail swinging behind him. Mo’at gave nothing away as she added more mush to your arm. You held back a scoff, irritated that you were the only one who couldn’t understand a single word.

“Another sign from Eywa,” Mo’at spoke in English. She looked at you almost knowingly as she continued. “This dreamwalker is here for a reason. Maybe for the same reason, Jakesully had come to us. Or something completely different. Perhaps this is her way of choosing a fourth for you.”

Neytiri perked up instantly, her hand squeezing your good shoulder gently. Jake’s head was bowed, hiding his expression. And Tsu’tey just frowned. And you felt your entire face grow hot. Suddenly you were rather aware of everything around you. If you had been standing, you would’ve fainted.

“Or maybe it’s something else?” You offered, trying to move the conversation forward instead of enduring this awkward and uncomfortable silence.

Mo’at watched all four of your expressions and huffed, “Come. We will just ask the Great Mother ourselves—”

“No, we don’t have to.” Jake stood straighter, tail lashing behind him.

Neytiri stood and sent him a look, “Ma’ Jake—”

But he shook his head, “I’m not doing it. I’m not taking her as a mate. That’s not fair and you know it—”

“And if it is in Eywa’s will?” Mo’at challenged, raising an invisible brow. “What then, Jakesully?”

“Don’t I get a say in this?” You added, already growing irritated by this conversation.

“Yeah, you’re right. You do have a say in this. But I’m gonna make this easy for you.” Jake nodded steely. “We’re fine as three. There is no room for another—especially her.”

“Fuck you!” You snapped, shooting to your feet. “Who the hell do you think you are—”

“Hey, I’m on your side here!” Jake argued. You failed to see the surprised reaction from your outburst, you failed to see the way he raised his hand as if easing you like you were a dangerous animal about to pounce—no you saw that actually. And it only pissed you off even more. “Do you want me to lie and welcome you into my family with open arms just like that? Or do you want the honest truth, Reeds? You value that, right?”

You let out a humorless laugh, skin boiling in anger now, “You really are full of shit, you know that, Sully? So you think it’s okay to just discard me then? As if I don’t have any fucking feelings? Am I just an emotionless body to you, Jake? Am I not supposed to be offended? ‘Especially her’? What the fuck is that supposed to mean?!”

“That’s enough—” Neytiri started only to be stopped by Mo’at who watched the two of you keenly. Even Tsu’tey didn’t even speak up. He didn’t snap at you nor did he stop Jake. He just watched on in grim silence that neither you nor Jake bothered to notice.

“I’m doing this for you—I’m not sayin’ this just to be an asshole, Reeds!”

“Could’ve fooled me.” You snickered mockingly. Honestly, you had no idea why you were so angry. You were just tired. Tired of him. Tired of this. Tired of all this bullshit. “Well, if it makes you feel any better, Sully, you’re not exactly prize material either, so there. Why don’t you just say that instead of hiding it behind some horse shit—”

“Jesus Christ.” He muttered in disbelief. Jake looked to the sky, struggling to respond. Struggling to string the words together.

But it shouldn’t have been that hard. “You’re right, I do value truth, Sully. So be fucking honest and just spit it out. Enough of the trying to protect me bullshit—I’ve heard enough of it and I don’t need any more of it. Say what you want, do hide now. It’s easy when it comes to me, right?”

You were just angry. So, so angry. You weren’t even sure if this anger deserved to be directed at him. If this anger was even about this conversation. You weren’t even sure why you were fighting so fiercely.

Jake scoffed, “And you think you make being around you easy? You don’t think maybe there’s a reason I blow up at you? You don’t think maybe it’s because you can be a huge asshole sometimes?”

“Oh yeah, this mate shit is going to work out perfectly.” You snorted.

“I can’t mate with someone I don’t love,” Jake spoke more bluntly toward Mo’at, Neytiri, and Tsu’tey. “I don’t know how much more honest I have to be about this. I can’t love someone like her. How can I? Not even a fucking miracle could ever get me to, and that’s the truth. You happy now? Is that what you want to hear?”

The tent was silent by then. Neytiri, in the former of your eye, had her tail lashing behind her. Tsu’tey, who stood further back behind Jake held an unreadable expression instead of his usual severity but offered nothing. Mo’at just waited with her keen eyes on all four of you. She then sighed and shook her head, mumbling something in Na’vi.

You wished you weren’t so affected by his words. “Fine. Don’t love me, Jake.” You wished your heart didn’t sink to the pits of your stomach. You wished your heart wouldn’t take this much hut. You didn’t even want him. You didn’t even want a mate.

But you were knowable. Unlovable.

You’ve always known this. So it shouldn’t have hurt so much for someone to tell you this straight to your face.

“Earn that shit.” You muttered, schooling your face into your usual impassive mask despite your achy eyes. Now you looked to Mo’at who was watching you in particular, “Is that all, Tsahik?”

You failed to see Jake’s shoulders fall and his ears lower, “Reeds—”

Mo’at spoke over him, “I want you back here in two days. Your wound is not fully healed yet.” She then looked at Tsu’tey, her eyes seeming to want something from him, “Is there a problem with that, Olo’eyktan?”

At this, Tsu’tey shook his head stiffly, “No. You are Tsahik. You must continue your work.”

“Mmph.” Mo’at huffed in what appeared to be disappointment. “Then you may leave, dreamwalker.”

You nodded and stalked toward the entrance. Neytiri tried reaching for you but you had been to quick for her grasp to catch, “Ma ‘tanhi…”

Jake avoided your gaze as you passed him, “I’ll see you later, Neytiri.” You stepped out of the hut, not bothering to look back.

After jumping down a few branches and landing on the ground, you found that two warriors were waiting for you on pa’li. One of the warriors guided a pa’li toward you, which you got on without much difficulty.

And without looking back, the pa’li began to move. You were cold. And tired.

Half alive and half buried in the ground.

“I will make sure my warriors return her safely to the human base,” Tsu’tey spoke stiffly as he ducked out of the hut. Jake watched him go, uneasy about what his mate could’ve been thinking at the moment. It was the most difficult when Tsu’tey was like this. He was hard to read and wouldn’t let up until he confessed to what he was feeling. So, all Jake had to do was wait until then.

But right now, he did know one thing.

Fuck.

He’d gone too far.

Neytiri had watched you go just a few feet from the entrance of the hut and by the time you were long gone she stalked back inside. Jake flinched when her glare stabbed him through his thin skin when it came to her fury, “Why did you do that? Why were you so cruel? Why are you trying to push her away?”

His ears flattened again, “Tiyawn—”

“No!” She shook her head and backed away from his reach. “You humans and hiding your true feelings. I know you, Jake. I know what you said wasn’t true and yet you chose to hurt her anyway. Why? Why do this?”

Jake frowned, his body tensing, “How do you know this isn’t how I feel—”

“Baah!” Neytiri hissed, smacking his shoulder. “Even if what you said was true, you did not need to be cruel! You do not need to hurt her! Do you even care?!”

“Of course I do!” Jake argued. He wasn’t heartless. Of course, he saw how his words affected—continued to affect you.

God, why did you always react that way when it was him? Why did his heart always feel heavy whenever it came to yelling at you these days? You weren’t like this with Tsu’tey, you always fired back. Why was it different with him? “What I said was true. I am doing this for her! I’m trying to protect her—”

“From what?” Neytiri hissed as if the words he was saying were false. “No more excuses, Ma’ Jake, what is it that you are so afraid of?!”

How did she do it? How did she fiercely protect you like this without a care in the world? How did she fiercely care about you without being frightened of the consequences? “You weren’t there when Artsut threatened her life.” At this Neytiri faltered, her ears lowering slightly but Jake continued before she could interrupt her again, “She’s already being pulled into this mess with the clans. What happens if Artsut, a woman with great influence within this clan, comes for her? What happens when we take another human mate that she doesn’t approve of? What then? It’ll be our fault that Reeds becomes ruined. It’ll be our fault for not being careful—”

“That is not for us to decide,” Neytiri told him bluntly but her face softened—only a bit. “Your heart comes from a good place but your words are misguided.” She gingerly grew closer to him until her hand could reach the curve of his cheek as she gently caressed it. “Make this right. Enough of this fighting. Can’t you see she’s tired?”

Mo’at, who had been crushing some herbs in a bowl, did not refute her daughter’s wise words.

Jake was outnumbered. But he was also tired too.

You came back to Hell’s Gate to find a white sheet over your former body, right in the middle of a nearly empty room.

Cry. Just cry. Cry.

Instead, you stayed in that silent room. You did not look away from the body.

Half alive and half buried in the ground.

All you needed was a tombstone.

boom! chapter 9! this one chapter i was definitely nervous to write because we see jake and reeds at, in my opinion, their worst in their slowly developing relationship and a peek at the beginning of tsu'tey and reeds' future relationship.

hope you enjoyed it! chapter 10 should be coming soon!

(i'm not adding any more people anymore!)

taglist: @doggyteam2028 @bigbootahjudy @innercreationflower @n7cje @celi-xxmoon @readerofallthingss @sillyblues @saturnhas82moons @1mawh0re @aprosiacperson @loserwithnofriends @garfieldsladybird @slutforsmut4ever @lik0

#[you’re gonna go far] #jake sully x reader #jake sully #avatar jake sully x reader #avatar jake #avatar jake sully #avatar the way of water #neytiri avatar #neytiri te tskaha mo'at'ite #neytiri x y/n #neytiri x reader #neytiri x jake #neytiri sully #neytiri fanfiction #jeytiri #tsu'tey x reader #tsu'tey imagine #jake sully x tsu'tey #tsu'tey avatar #tsu’tey x reader #tsu'tey te rongloa ateyitan #tsu'tey x y/n #dilf!jake sully x reader #dilf!jake sully #atwow #norm spellman #avatar 2009

[forbidden-sunlight]

yandere!carcel escalante with ines!reader scenario

Warning: OOC, obsessive behavior, implied violence, language, mention of death, possible spoilers for latest chapters on the manhwa.

There may be possible triggers in this story.

If you do not feel comfortable venturing any further, please hit the 'back' button on your device or computer and read something much more pleasant than a possible series of unfortunate events.

You are responsible for your own Internet consumption!

Hey guys, hope you have all been well! I'd like to thank @ceeesxy-blog for providing honest feedback on the earlier drafts on this story!

For those who are wondering, I am still revising/editing the other headcanons I had written for Carcel Escalante. When they are ready, they will be posted.

With that being said, sit back, relax, and let's dive into world of romance and second chances. Or maybe four :)

The Spirit was glaring heatedly at your back again. She seemed to be doing that a lot more lately than critiquing your posture or whispering the names of the nobility in your ear to make sure you did not mispronounce it when they approached you at teeth-grinding social functions. It made you wonder what you did to upset her for the nth time behind the polite smile you gave to the blonde-haired child sitting across from you. 

For the record, it had not been your intention to possess the body of Ines Valeztena de Perez  in the first place. You simply woke up and found her soul occupying the same space. Two souls in one meatsack, to put it so crudely; impossible in theory, yet here is the miracle. Note the sarcasm. 

Where this is her fourth reincarnation, it was your first, and you had retained the knowledge of this reality where it was the backdrop of a novel based on her life. The title? The Broken Ring, This Marriage Will Fail Anyway. Not only did include the details of her life in this timeline, but also her marriages to both the future Emperor and the painter Emiliano. One was a nightmare where she took her own life, and the second was to get away from her responsibilities and be happy for once. Her brother killed Emiliano and the child she had with him, dragging her back to the duchy she had tried to escape from. 

In this life, she has already secured an engagement with Carcel Escalante on the basis that he is the best-looking young man. Her father approved because he loved his only daughter. That worked in her favor because she did not want to get involved with the imperial family again, and already had a plan in the works. This plan involved treating Carcel coldly for seventeen years and he would have numerous affairs, before and after their marriage. Once she gives birth to a child, she will divorce him and attain true freedom. But now, Ines has become a lingering Spirit which only you could see. You are occupying the Body. You are the main driver behind it. And by God, her plan is utter bullshit. 

Make a child who has yet to understand communication and very much innocent in the way of how an adult’s mind works hate you by being a cold-hearted bitch? Absolutely not! That is not how you treat someone, even if you do remember that Carcel Escalante was a playboy in a previous lifetime. This is the present, do not put so much emphasis on the past. 

You have told the Spirit many times when the room was empty and you were visiting her in your mindscape; the backdrop of a library and seated in a plush chair with a table that held two steaming cups of coffee that you couldn’t taste. You did not know if she or you had created it, but this was where she had closed herself off most of the time and where you would see her as soon as you drifted off to sleep. Whether she actually listened to you during these therapy sessions or just put up with your company because you were in her body is another question entirely. 

“Ines?”

Jolting slightly, you looked up from the rim of  your teacup and nodded at the flustered Carcel Escalante. “Yes?” Cerulean orbs twinkled beneath the chandelier’s light as he stared at you, cradling his own cup and looking…frustrated? You furrowed your brow in concern, carefully placing it back down on the saucer that sat on the table. “Is everything all right, Carcel?”

“Why?” He answered your question with a question. You played along, asking him what he meant. 

“Do you really want to marry me because of my good looks?”

Oh, dear. Suppose this was a conversation bond to be brought up. You thought warily. Not even a minute has passed and already you could feel the Spirit’s menacing glare directed at the back of your head. Ines, for God’s sake, trust me. Let me handle this. You hissed in your mind. 

“You cannot ruin this chance.”

Ines, I am fully aware that this is crucial to your plan, thank you. Your very piss-poor plan, I might add. You promised you would give me one chance to prove there is another way to attain happiness. I will deliver. So let me speak or so help me, I will stuff your consciousness in the back of my brain and lock you in there until the day is over. You threatened. That wasn’t a threat either. It was a promise because you had done it before, unintentionally, when the world was spinning and her nagging was not helping. You couldn’t allow her access to the Body for nearly two days. 

She went silent, and the heat on the back of your head subsided slightly, but you could see her from the corner of your eye. Folding your hands neatly in your lap and straightening the curve of your spine, you spoke to Carcel with your eyes directly locked onto his own. 

“Yes. You are very handsome by the Empire’s standards, Carcel. But that isn’t the only reason.”

“It…isn’t?”

“Correct.”

“Then, why?”

“To avoid being married into the imperial family. Your cousin, the crown prince, Oscar is…a twit. Emotionally immature, rude, I could go on. You recall how he arrived at my home without any notice nor any requests to visit, and I told him that I did not like him, yes? You were there, dragged by him because he can do that.” 

Carcel’s face paled. “You could get punished for speaking like that about him. He is the future of our Empire.”

“And what a bleak future that will be.” You sniffed. 

“Ines!”

“The Empress wouldn’t risk angering one of the founding families of this country. Without our support, they would not be standing where they are right now, the pinnacle of high society and power, so I am not afraid to criticize how her son has no regard for the consequences of his actions because he believes his status gives him an excuse to do anything he wants to do.” You squeezed your hands together. “I also believe you are much more agreeable and level-headed than him. Your good looks are a bonus…but I would like to get to know you more. Your likes, your dislikes, anything, really, that you are comfortable with sharing. Believe it or not, Carcel Escalante, I do want us to get along. Not just for appearance's sake.”

You watched his eyes widen in disbelief, his face pinken with embarrassment before he stuttered. “R-Really?”

“Yes.”

“A-And you won’t…be mean? Or ignore me?”

You shook your head. “I will not.” You said. “If I am cruel in your eyes, I would rather you say it to my face then keep silent. I will not understand how you feel if you do not say anything. Though…if the imperial family is watching us, I might have to act out of character. Not just to protect myself and my family from their interference, but yours. Do you understand?”

“I-I suppose.” Carcel swallowed. “But…will you inform me…if you have to act like that?”

“I shall.” 

You answered Carcel’s questions as honestly as you could to a six-year-old child, even when you were roughly the same age as him. He seemed to believe you, as his stiffened posture loosened, and his smile was a little less forced. Eventually it was time for him to leave the estate and return to the Escalante duchy. You walked him to the door alongside the servants, and bade him farewell. When his carriage faded in the distance, growing smaller and smaller, the Spirit wasted no time in materializing, scolding you for making such promises right until it was time for bed. 

But this was a positive change, you emphasized, not a negative one. Would she rather hate the two of you for saying that you liked him and then say you don’t care if he has an affair because your feelings change? That made absolutely no sense. Yes, feelings change with time, this is true, but it is still cruel in your perspective and you will not subject Carcel to such treatment. 

When you received an invitation to attend the Empress’ annual tea party, a letter from the Escalante duchy was delivered to your desk the very next day. Carcel asked if he would have the honor to be your escort. You replied that you would be delighted; you were looking forward to seeing him there, and do not mind if you were acting coldly towards him if the Empress or the crowned prince were within feet of either of you. 

You kept your word to him. Now, and for the following seventeen years. 

If neither of your schedules were not booked with various lessons and social functions, Carcel would make an effort to visit you or invite you to spend an afternoon doing something together. He would offer flowers, and you thanked him. You idly chatted over lunch at a cafe after a shopping trip, all expenses paid by Carcel at his insistence, even when your monthly allowance was more than enough to purchase jewelry, dresses, or anything that piqued your interest during the outing. 

When he was invited to a friendly hunting trip at the Valeztena estate, Carcel had been stunned into silence as you handled the recoil of the hunting rifle in your hands without so much as a sound. 

The Spirit had drilled the basics of gun safety and aiming into your brain until she was confident that no one would think the wiser in the unlikely event that the two of you had to exchange control over the Body. Moreover, it put her at ease knowing she could protect herself from the crown prince. She will not allow Oscar to get the upper hand in this lifetime. Never again. 

You agreed wholeheartedly with her reasoning. Now if she actually lifted some damned weights between target practice and sipping tea with her peers, that would be great. You did not want the time and effort you have put into toning your arms from swinging a practice sword in the knight’s training arena to go to waste. 

Securing a competent tutor who would willingly teach a woman the fundamentals of swordsmanship, even if it’s a fucking rapier and not a broadsword like you initially wanted to learn how to use, had been difficult. If the Spirit was going to use a weapon to protect herself, then so are you. 

End of discussion. 

Carcel eventually became of age and was forced to enlist in the naval academy as his forefathers had done. It was the first step towards becoming the duke of the Escalante estate. Although you were a little sad to see him go, you promised to write him letters. If you were allowed to visit him at the base or a port that wasn’t too far from the Empire’s shores, you swore that you would try, weather permitting of course. 

However…if you or the Spirit had known the weight of these promises…would you have known just how madly in love Carcel Escalante de Esposa was with you? Would he? 

Carcel hated his time at the naval academy. As invigorating and stressful it was to learn everything about a ship’s vessel to the areas where the enemies of the Empire have attacked in recent years and even swordsmanship or rifle training, there were days when he wanted to throw everything away and just run off from Meldoza. 

Never looking back,  becoming a free man who could do as he pleased without the obligations. 

The soldiers in his fleet understood his frustration and have offered more than once to take him to the ports and have a bit of fun with some lovely ladies, on their tap. Yet for all his ranting and grumbling, it took a single letter from his dear Ines to keep the young duke grounded. 

She informed him of the events occurring in the Empire’s polite society, highlighting gossip and any exploits pertaining to his cousin, aggravated that she still cannot swing her sword at the right angle just yet even after her tutor went over the lesson several times, amongst other topics of discussion including what she has been doing since he’s been at sea. She reminded him to stay strong, keep his wits sharp, and never forget that she is here, waiting for him to return. Before he ventured out to sea for his duties, he would always keep a letter folded against his breast pocket. A reminder of why he is here. 

Contrary to the rumors circulating around him, he did not elect to remain in the military for an additional five years because he was avoiding getting married at the tender age of eighteen. He wanted to prove to his future father-in-law that he is worthy to be the husband of his only daughter. 

Just because he may be lacking in some areas, that does not mean he should be switched out for someone higher up or of equal ranking in the hierarchy. Or with a gentleman whom Duke Valeztena would much prefer to have as a son-in-law than him. That will never happen so long as he, Carcel Escalante de Esposa, lives. 

He is a man who will get jealous if anyone would dare to approach his future wife with the intention of bedding her once he, her husband, had gotten tired of her. An absolutely foolish notion, because Carcel will remain faithful to Ines. 

It would take a lot of self-control to not gut those fools right on the spot, because Ines would hate getting blood on the floor. Furthermore, he would never have a mistress before or after he exchanged his vows. Women might line up outside his door because adultery is encouraged in the Ortega Empire. Flowers and love letters might decorate every square inch of his office. Temptation will lurk around every corner, and he will burn them in his fireplace. The ladies? Well, he’d tell them to politely sod off and never darken his doorstep again. 

If there were gifts from Ines, however, he would keep him. 

Ines is his sun. The light of his life. No one else would even compare to the woman who is waiting for him to return from these treacherous waters. Until it was his time to leave this world, he would show Ines just how much he loved her. He would buy her anything she wanted, make her life as comfortable as possible even if she told him a thousand times that she does not need anything. 

Just never leave his side. Never fall in love with another man who wasn’t him, because he cannot conceive a universe without you. 

Taglist

@lxdymoon0357

@nunezs-stuff

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@yandere-dark-cupid

@that-one-pretty-bitch

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@nunezs-stuff

#forbidden-sunlight #yandere x reader #x reader #yandere male #yandere #ns.fw #the broken ring this marriage will fail anyway #carcel escalante #carcel escalante x reader #ines!reader #cw obsessive love #cw obsessive behavior #tw violence #tw obsessive behavior #tw obsessive love #yandere manhwa x reader

[scyllas-revenge]

Leap of Faith

aka an Only One Bed headcanon with no context whatsoever

because this popped into my head and I wanted to be able to write and finish something for once god damn it. @the-girl-with-the-algebra-book this is for you ���

Legolas/Human Reader (gender-neutral)

Word count: 663

Rating: G

Read on AO3

New!! There’s a part 2 here!

Legolas is instantly flustered at the sight of the single bed, his eyes darting between you and the pillows and back again. Despite himself, he’s half-contemplating diving out the window to freedom—but at the look on your face, he forces himself to take a shuddering breath.

You’re more than happy to share the bed, you reassure him: there’s plenty of room, and you’re a heavy sleeper, so he won’t disturb you. But he rejects the offer smoothly. Elves do not sleep like mortals, of course, and he need not lie down to find his rest as you do.

For the first time, he regrets it.

Legolas is a gentleman: he turns away quickly as you slip out of your traveling clothes and boots and slide under the covers, but the rustling of your garments and slide of fabric against your skin is so loud in the silence of the little bedroom, so intimate, that his heartbeat lurches in his chest. By the time he risks a glance back at you, you’re buried in blankets and pillows, looking more at peace than he’s ever seen you.

And now there is nothing to do but wait for dawn.

He pours water over the coals in the fireplace as your breathing evens out in sleep. He paces quietly. He sighs. Time slips by, and his eyes dart to you more and more often.

He’s curious. That’s what he tells himself, anyway. Legolas has so rarely been around mortals, and the way they sleep is fascinating. You’re deeply, wholeheartedly asleep—no wide-open staring eyes, no mind still active and wandering, elf-like.  

He’s curious. Your chest rises and falls under the blankets, your breaths even, calm. In through the nose, with the slightest snore, then out through the mouth in a warm puff. He finds himself stepping closer to the bed, transfixed.

He’s curious. That’s all. His elven eyes can make out the darting of your pupils beneath their lids, the slight parting of your lips. He leans closer, unconsciously. Perhaps you’re dreaming—and he hopes, with a sudden jolt, that you’re dreaming of him. And as though in answer, your lashes flutter restlessly, a single word escaping your parted lips: “Legolas.”

Oh, fine. He’s far more than just curious.  

Legolas is perched on the bed beside you before he is aware of it, his heart in his throat. Perhaps it meant nothing—very likely it meant nothing, for rarely was there sense to be found in mortal dreams. He should move away, and stop staring longingly at your sleeping form. You would hardly appreciate it if you knew.

Or would you? You had invited him to share the bed with you, after all.

Thoroughly defeated, Legolas slips under the covers to join you. Even in sleep, you’re enough to overpower him. And even in sleep, you turn toward him, clutching at his torso and pressing yourself close. His breath hitches.

Your hands clutch tight to his tunic as you nuzzle into his side, and Legolas curls against you, your legs tangling together. A shudder runs through his body.

He breathes in and out as evenly as he can, in imitation of you, and closes his eyes against the pillows, just as you did. Perhaps he can sleep as you do, just this once, so he can survive this overwhelming closeness. Keep his eyes shut tight and his mind closed off from the world, so he can outlast it.

It frightens him for a moment—the uncertainty of his tight-shut eyes, the lack of awareness of the wider world. How odd this mortal sleep is. It feels like a leap of faith. But your breath is warm and even against his neck, your hair soft as it splays against the exposed skin of his neck and collarbone, and his heartbeat slows, sleep—true sleep—stealing over him at last.  

This leap is an easy one to take, for he has faith in you utterly.  

#legolas #lotr fanfic #legolas x reader #only one bed #oh god i've written in the present tense for real this time #what have i done #this started out as bullet points BULLET POINTS at least i've polished it a bit more than that

[actual-changeling]

the true weight of aziraphale's words only hits him days later, when the shock has worn off and the world no longer looks vivid-sharp and fragmented. 

just like the old times, only even nicer, and back in the bookshop, hearing him say it for the first time, the heaven underneath it all had ripped him open. now, though, with heavy limbs and their respective speeches burned into his brain, syllable after syllable, it's the second part that re-opens those very same wounds.

was this not nice? he wants to ask him, the walls, fucking god herself—or scream, rather, he has grown rather fond of screaming—because he thought it had been, their life on earth. nice and soft and messy, full of arguments, yes, but also nights of laughter and shared heat. graveyard walks and afternoons in the park, eating at the ritz, feeding the ducks, basking in everything alive so they could feel alive, too.

crowley would have given him almost everything, followed him almost everywhere except the one place aziraphale wanted him to return to. after six thousand years, he had finally found the only thing crowley refused to give up—his freedom.

inch by inch, he had clawed his way out of hell and through more pain than he will ever be able to name, and the scars, the burn marks, the fresh air in his lungs are worth it, always have been and always will be. no longer an angel, never again, but not a demon either; he's been on his own side since the beginning.

crowley has thought of his existence as a shared one—theirs—but maybe, with his eyes opened and the truth bitter in his tongue, maybe they'd led two lives after all. one full of magic and fairy tales for aziraphale in which polishing away every spot and destroying every flaw would eventually create a perfect 'us'. he wanted to take him right back to the start, when mistakes didn't exist, when crowley didn't exist.

yet crowley, despite what he regularly told his plants, the mirror, himself, had never been chasing after something they did not have. love is just as flawed and messy as life, and he basks in traffic jams and cloudy days, in existing as his own person without any affiliation, occult, ethereal, or otherwise.

he had never wanted them to be perfect, just undeniably real. in the end, even that was too much to foolishly hope for, a lesson once learned branded into his skin anew:

ask and you shall lose.

#alex writes good omens #good omens #crowley #aziraphale #good omens season 2 #go2 #aziracrow #crowley x aziraphale #ineffable husbands #ineffable wives #ineffable spouses #ineffable divorce #the final fifteen #hey do you ever cry so hard your body stops being able to do so and then write trauma angst because you'll never guess what happened to me

[essenteez]

𝐑 𝐎 𝐎 𝐌 𝐌 𝐀 𝐓 𝐄 || m i n g i

"She is rare and real. I'm not letting her go."

"He was attracted to rawness and realness, to sharp edges and straightforwardness. And when suddenly, you dropped the act of perfectionist he, in fact, disliked and revealed your true nature, you became all what he needed in a woman that his hands, lips and tongue were so eager to worship."

𝐒𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲 : after failed attempt to impress your handsome roommate, you decided to stop making a fool out of yourself and went back to the old, unimpressive you. Lack of dress code around the house and general chaos came back for good. Little did you know, the "hard-to-impress" roommate began to see you with very...very different eyes.

𝐖𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 : m i n o r s d o n o t i n t e r a c t , explicit language, fingering (f/recieving), intense cunnigulins, doggy style, cum on a back, unprotected sex, mdom, hair pulling.

𝐏𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠 : Mingi x (f)reader

𝐆𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞 : smut, little fluff, body imperfections appreciation

𝐖𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭 : 5k

07.35 pm. Friday evening. Everyone's favorite. 

A moment of relief and appreciated freedom. A precious time of your boss having no power to control you. Your annoying coworkers are nowhere to be found to screech above your head. A piece of paradise where you can begin to enjoy the weekend to the fullest.

Of course, it depends on people and their individual understanding of what "to the fullest" means. To you, it meant laying in bed, in the most comfy clothes, binge watching anime while devouring not so healthy food, drinks and snacks. 

You craved McDonald's today. No, you actually had been craving it since the early hours of Monday. And now it was time for you to treat yourself, give in to pure indulgence. No one could oppose this polygamy relationship between you, BigMac, chicken nuggets, fries and Sprite tonight. 

Thankfully, you could skip the usage of the restaurant app, many a times they screwed up your order. You overheard your roommate talking something about leaving to help his friend with something. He could easily pick up your food on his way back and bring it right into your gluttonous arms. What a lucky day.

You giggled in pure happiness.

*

The man's movements stopped abruptly. His arm hung midair with half of it already in the sleeve of the black jean jacket.

Your sudden disgustingly adorable giggles caught Mingi's attention as he stepped in the living room, trying to get to the hall. He unconsciously gazed in the direction of the sounds of joy. His sight was flooded by the light inside your room, door opened just enough for his eyes to almost see your bare bottom on display.

Only God knew how much he wished he didn't look.

"Fuck." He mumbled as quietly as he could, thanking the noises coming from your laptop for hiding the growl his throat pushed out.

The rapid increase of his pulse and need for deeper breaths, made him throw spirited curses to his own self. Nevertheless, the black eyes studied you in silence.

He seemed to examine you like one of the paintings on the Sistine Chapel's ceiling, even though you laid there on your belly, only in your oversized, gray T-shirt and cotton panties with some pink ribbons on it. You were kicking the air with your feet hidden in socks that dazzled eyes with bright yellow baby chicks. 

With resistance, his arm finally submerged into the jacket's sleeve, but still, Mingi didn't move from his spot. His legs simply refused to listen to their master. Boldly watching you, he seemed to be studying your uncovered parts by heart.

Your full thighs that looked as if they were inviting him to grab a handful of them. The slight cellulite that only proved how juicy your flesh was. It was almost painful to watch you, so unaware that you were fulfilling all his kinks and fantasies.

He clenched his teeth at the sudden throb between his legs.

He had to leave. Now. Of course due to business to tend to, but mostly because he was a heartbeat away from falling on his knees, crawling to you and begging you to let him touch you.

Despite the rational realization, he did not move an inch.

Your stretch marks glistened in the lamps light like translucent tattoos. He couldn't stop the sudden images of him kissing each one of them in his head.

The worst was yet to come as his eyes landed on the folds of your ass emerging from underneath the panties. The rolls of flesh where your thighs connected with your butt awakened a destructive urge to sink his fingers around them, to kiss and bite.

The unforgiving pulsing in his pants almost made him storm in your room. He needed to try to gain control again, he was not a wild beast after all.

Pinching the skin on his forearm, Mingi hissed at the unpleasant feeling.

"I'm leaving! I'll be back in two, three hours!"

He yelled this information more to remind himself rather than you. With clenched fists, he forced his legs to walk up the door.

"Mingi!"

No, please stay where you are, he thought panicked.

He didn't dare to turn around in case you jumped out in front of him 

"Yeah?" No one knew how much effort he put in that one word.

"Could you buy me McDonald's on your way back? The usual!?"

Thank God, you were too lazy to leave the room but the sweet tone you had made him wrapped around your finger, made the devil on his shoulder laugh like a Disney villain. You must sound absolutely heavenly when you begged for other things in your mouth.

"Ok!" he agreed, voice slightly breaking but firm. He shook away the thoughts before he turned back around and said them aloud. 

***

Mingi's tone sounded somewhat annoyed, making you think.

"Maybe I should've used the app instead."

Feeling bad, you looked in the darkness outside of your room after hearing the door begin to shut. You didn't manage to see him but what you did notice was your door being way more opened than what you remember it was.

Your frowned eyes lowered to your lower body. Slightly judging your naked legs, you realized your shirt was rolled up your waist which revealed your whole ass and your favorite panties.

"Oops."

Mingi either walked right past your room and didn't notice anything or he saw you with all of your grace. It took you a long second laying in stillness, trying to look for some sort of embarrassment in yourself, but eventually you rolled back on your belly.

"Ah, never mind" you shrugged and went back to drool over the tattooed Sukuna on your laptop screen.

Mingi had never shown any interest in you for all these years of living under the same roof. He was nice and a great friend but that was where it ended. Nothing more. 

Oh well.

When your friend moved out to live with her boyfriend, you had a hard time finding a new roommate. The house, despite being an amazing place, was pretty far from the city center. Not a lot of people would decide to take long journeys to their workplace.

You lived alone for six months until one day you got a call. The man on the other side was interested in the room beside yours as he worked from home and liked being away from the city noises. 

You had to admit, you preferred to live with another woman but that time you were desperate so you offered him to come and talk about the deal.

The memory of his frame still roamed in your mind, as it took up almost all the space of the entrance. You loudly gulped before even greeting him. And you were nervously swallowing for the next few months when he officially became your roommate.

At the beginning you tried to shape his view of you as the best. You changed your "house outfit" to more covered and neat, to make him think you have class and to hide the unattractive marks of your body. Meals you made were more sophisticated, and you followed a more healthy lifestyle. Even the gym lived to see you within its walls. Your room was cleaner than the ones in the ads of cleaning products. And most of all, everything about you had to look and smell like a volcano of femininity.

How lame of you.

To those days, you still wondered why you were doing all of that, to impress a dude that had absolutely no obligation to fall for you. All just because you were single and he was hot? Well, he was more than hot and you were basically covered in dust from singlehood. Still, it was unnecessary and you wasted time on doing things you didn't even enjoy. 

After realizing your own stupidity, you went back to your old habits which actually allowed you to get more comfortable around him and in your own house. As the ties of attempting to impress someone disappeared, you quickly slid back to your messy, untamed, normal self.

For his misfortune.

The change of your aura around him was rapid and it took a 180° turn. One day you seemed to calculate every step you took and the next day the scheduled life was gone. It gave its place to chaos.

Truly, he disliked your visible chase after perfection and social media influence victimhood. It made you look almost robotic. You also seemed to force yourself to do most of it, especially going to the gym.

He did not know what dictated the sudden change but Mingi was glad that somehow due to it you finally became more relaxed and looked more like yourself. 

However.

While you quickly found your comfort, he began to fall into a void of crushing lust and decreased self control, more and more everyday. The views like the one he just saw, were now on a daily basis. It was exhausting - pretending he was unaffected while in reality it trapped him entirely.

He was attracted to rawness and realness, to sharp edges and straightforwardness. And when suddenly, you dropped the act of perfectionist that annoyed him and revealed your true nature, you became all what he needed in a woman that his hands, lips and tongue were so eager to worship.

The way you moved, unaware of how feminine you were with something so simple like reaching for a coffee cup. The way you smelled, even after you stole his shampoo since you forgot to buy yours. The way you were all blushed after the steamy shower and paraded in only a towel around the apartment. The way you laughed out loud without trying to hold it in. Mingi melted at the sight of how excited you got for food, or when you got a text the postman was on their way with the new books you ordered. Or that a new season of your favourite show was out. Everything now was like sweet bait for his bee-like mind.

Mingi halted beside his car and looked at his reflection in its windows. Despite the twilight, he still saw the flames in his own eyes as all these thoughts of you flashed before them. The flames were just a tiny portion of the hellfire devouring him from inside.

Did he officially reach his limit? Somehow his mind kept fighting his body, however it began to realize it was outnumbered.

The first thought is the best.

Instead of the car keys, Mingi reached for a phone in his pocket. He didn't wait long for his friend to pick up the call.

"Sorry, man. I won't make it. You need to find someone else to help you with furniture." He informed the man on the other side with no words of greeting.

Hearing the need for explanation, he sighed like all he carried were troubles.

"Old case came up. I have to deal with it at last."

***

Fictional men. Book ones or 2D ones, it didn't matter. Your all time guiltiest, of guilty pleasures. Oh, how you wish they suddenly came to life, knock at your door and solve all your problems and fulfill all your fantasies.

"Ganbare, ganbare." you heard from the speakers as one of your new anime daddies spoke up.

"What the fuck, Sukuna?" You whined at the scene, burying your face in the pillow placed under you. You wanted to whine some more at the perfectly matched dubbing but the sound of doors abruptly opening and shutting caught you off guard.

Mingi left not whole five minutes ago. It had to be him. You hit the space button to stop the video.

"You forgot something?" you asked, listening closely, hopefully you were right.

"Yes."

The slight panic and insecurity that began to shape disappeared at the voice of your roommate. You turned your head back to the screen and restarted the video.

The music and a fight scene was loud enough to mute the sound of steps that entered your room. Only the sudden weight, pulling the bed down made you realize someone was indeed inside there with you.

You tried to look at Mingi, expecting to see him sitting on the edge of your bed for some unknown to you reason. But before you could even turn your head around, out of nowhere his arm appeared above your head, closing your laptop with his finger.

You couldn't look up but you felt it with all your being. Mingi hung above your entire frame, his arms on both sides of you, your legs trapped between his. His mouth, dangerously near your ear.

"I forgot to make something clear." He let out a growl he didn't have to control anymore, sending chills that were like a rifle series, from your head to your toes.

You were too stunned to form a word, feeling the temperature rise incredibly fast. Mingi took it as a chance to continue.

"If we're going to live together, we have to compromise, (y/n). I don't know what you're trying to accomplish, being so careless around me. If you wanted to seduce me, you succeeded. Congratulations."

Seduce him? No, you stopped trying three months ago. Now you were just living your life. How could he get it all backwards? Was it possible that the you being comfortable in your own skin, the chaotic you kept him awake at night?

You would scoff from the irony but, the position you were in and the whole man above you — with his lips so close to your neck, did not allow you to do anything but lay there like a mouse snared in a trap. 

"If you didn't then please have mercy on the poor me and restrain yourself a little, so I could eat, sleep and coexist with you in peace and not fight the urge to pin you down to the first surface in sight and beg you to let me worship every inch of your body."

You were still silent, which made him spread his arms further and lean closer to you.

"Got it?" He asked, which sounded more like a threat.

Mingi had seen you in your most vulnerable  position, and that had him speaking like he was a slave to your body. You smiled to yourself, at the confidence boost. 

It was time to make a move.

He flinched at the unexpected touch on his crotch. He looked down to see your feet in bright socks brushing his clothed dick in wave-like motions.

"So, no McDonald's then?" You asked, pulling your head back to show him the fake disappointment on your face.

"(y/n)..." he begged, fighting the need to grind his hips.

"What can I do?" You shrugged, still not letting go of the act.

You did have him in your hands.

You suddenly turned around on your back and positioned yourself more comfortably as he pulled away a little in surprise. He looked you up and down, at your hands playing with your shirt, legs spreaded as if they were inviting him in. His grasp on the sheets tightened, trying to maintain maximum control.

"And what if I told you that I won't restrain myself?" You taunted with a pout, holding his dark gaze that came back to your face.

You were challenging him. He licked his lips at the lavious sight. The tightness in his pants bothered him more with every second of the view underneath him.

Your smile faded, giving its place to sultry expression. One of your legs raised and began brushing on his side.

"What if I also told you, you can pin me down to the first place you see and do whatever you want to me?"

The joy of having an upper hand didn't last for long. His move was fast and decisive — Mingi grabbed your flirting leg, stopping it from escaping as he lowered himself down onto you, pinning you to the bed with his weight.

The man's lips brushed yours, "I have a rule, you know."

"And what rule is that?" You battled the impulse to lick his plum mouth.

"No sleeping with roommates just for the sake of a peaceful life under the same roof." He enlightened you, putting your legs on his hip, next grabbing a handful of your plushy thigh. You inhaled sharply at the power he did it with, "But you make it absolutely impossible to follow."

You smiled devilishly, "So, you had a rule."

His lips felt juicier and softer than you imagined. And you imagined them an ungodly amount of times. It felt like biting onto the ripest fruit with all the juices exploding. It would've been a salvation on a hot summer day. But in this case, an unforgiving heat fell onto your body, burning your veins and showing on your cheeks.

The kiss quickly turned from delectaing, getting familiar to a violent clash of teeth, tongues and mouth, all of it accompanied by loud wet noises. The kiss broke as every ounce of oxygen left your lungs. You grabbed your shirt to finally get rid of it but he halted your plans.

"Leave it. I'm fucking you in this." He promised, at the same time groaning as his eyes filled with your breasts falling out of your only top piece. 

He'd seen them unbrotherly bouncing under your oversized shirts almost everyday. Most of the time with no bra. Many times with erected nipples. They were teasing him while covered, which definitely woke a fetish in him. A fetish he never knew he had. A fetish he developed because of you.

"Why?"

Seeing you like this everyday got him laid in his bed and spent many nights imagining these scenes. Too many to not let it come to reality.

"Don't ask." He breathed out, while pulling the pillow from underneath you to put it on a side.

You didn't even have time to be confused as your nipples caught in his attention. One grabbed by his teeth and lips, the other twisted between his impatient fingers. Your back arched giving him all the access he needed. Mingi got the sweetest of whimpers out of you while kissing, sucking and massaging your tits that desired to fit in his big, untamed hands.

With kisses down your belly, he left your soft breasts, pulling your down shirt onto them. You squirmed in disappointment when your bosom lost his attention. But then he got dangerously close to your clothed cherry.

"I always admired your underwear collection but that is something else", he grinned, with his face hanging above your pussy like a cloud with a heavy rain over thirsty ground, "I thought these were ribbons…"

Once again he looked at the little pink tits painted all over your pelvis. 

"I also have a version with little vaginas. Wanna see?" You grinned back and grabbed a string of your panties on your hip. Pulling it, you quickly let it go which made a sound from a contact with your flesh.

His grin faded away at that little gesture of yours. Why did the bare minimum have him raging in lust? What kind of sorcery did you use?

"Maybe later."

He grabbed the side of your underwear as you and pulled all of it down. Your cute panties landed somewhere behind him.

You were all exposed to his darkened, lusty eyes.

"I have a real one to look at…" with every word he made sure his hot breath embraced your throbbing pussy. "...as well as lick, suck and fuck." 

"Mingi…" you immediately responded with a moan to his taunting. Your hips began to slightly twirl in front of his face when he positioned himself between your full thighs. They went up the next second, held by his decisive hands. He revealed every inch of your quivering womanhood to himself.

"Fuck, (y/n)" he whined at the sight of you, "Stunning. "

You felt cold air blowing on your folds. This little fucker. Your eyes darted onto him. Your roommate seemed to have fun, watching you struggle and wiggle while all he used was just air.

"Mingi, please" you begged shamelessly, "Hold on to your words, would you?"

"...as well as lick, suck and fuck."  Oh you were funny.

"Right." he scoffed in amusement.

His giggles were muted by his lips attaching with your dripping pussy. Air got caged in your lungs, fingers immediately tangled in his fluffy hair.

Tongue lapped at your poor clit, mouth mercilessly sucked it in between. Raw sounds of your juices blending with his building saliva resonated in the room as well as deep in your soul.

"Fuuck." You were melting at the touch of his warm muscle, wandering around your folds.

Mingi was quickly advancing with his actions. His left hand went around your right thigh, fingers reached to the upper part of your pussy.

Your folds were spread, reminding him now of butterfly wings. He licked his lips at the vision of the source of all the nectar he was tasting. You were wet beyond his expectations.

The index finger of his free hand now traced around the edges of your soaking hole, that were closing and opening under his touch.

You spasmed at the quick, single and almost dramatic licks that were gracing your opened clit. His eyes fed on the lewdness, glowing in yours.

"You won't let me cum so quickly, will you?" You almost cried out.

Damn that grin of his.

"Oh no, baby. I will make you scream in a second."

Sudden invasion of his finger made you raise your hips, however he quickly pinned back down. The movement was slow at first as if he was doing a recognition of your interiors.

"So soft and warm, as I imagined it to be." He complimented you with a hum, "So inviting." 

The middle finger answered the invitation, and join its neighbor inside you. There were no slow movements this time, no teasing. The pace was brutal, accompanied by your clit being violently sucked by his plumb lips.

"Mingi, fuuuck!" You screamed as loud as you were allowed in this condition.

The flood of pleasure, as much as it was welcome, came unexpectedly fast and powerful. It detuned your senses, took your breath away, controlled your body and whole being. You didn't know what to do with your hands, what to grab onto. Eventually they landed on your breast, adding more fuel to the fire happening between your legs.

His fingers pumped in and out of you, your rich juices made it much easier for them to move. Mingi sucked on you mercilessly, hamming loud which sent vibrations in the spot he was sending all his attacks towards. 

With the last ounce of sanity, you quickly registered the knob forming in your abdomen and that it was about to come undone, brutally.

"I'm cum-ming" you intended to scream but all you could master was a whisper.

At those words his fingers gave up on leaving your walls and stayed deep inside them. You felt them curl inside, gluing to your core while rubbing and pushing onto it.

"Yes! Yes, right there!" You grabbed his head again to keep him in place, "Right fucking there!"

"Give me all of it, baby!" he said and reattached with your clit again, quickly shaking his head to have you absolutely crashing, "All of it!"

Legs, framing his face began to tremble. Cumming intensively, you were crying out the curses of pure euphoria. Your vision blurred. You saw no shape, no color as his fingers hadn't stopped. He led your orgasm in all the directions he wanted. 

You had always been loud during sex but his skills made you reach new volumes. Your essence flooded his fingers, leaking out onto his mouth and chin. He began slowly moving inside you again to ride your ecstasy. 

Mingi took his time before finally leaving your throbbing cunt. Fingers slowly slid out of you, all wet, glistening in the light. No drop was left as the man collected everything off you and of himself, ending the act with a loud pop sound. You used this moment to calm down and regain your breath control.

You didn't say anything as he climbed up on you with kisses and your heated faces aligned. Both breathing heavily, you looked at each other. You didn't stay silent and still for long but those few seconds were worryingly intimate. There was something between you two. You couldn't say what it was but it was there, tangible. You saw it in his eyes, that he in fact noticed that too. 

Mingi allowed you to strip him off his black shirt and take your time to touch his chest, shaped abs and veiny hands that now rested on your sides. He felt his ego grow, seeing you worship his sun kissed muscles with awe.

"How do you want to take me?"

He raised his brows at your sudden question. 

That reaction of his made you smile. Maybe he wasn't that hard to impress after all.

"You want to tell me you've never seen me in certain positions?" 

"I have." He spoke before even the thought of other options of answer occured. However, Mingi didn't feel embarrassed with his honesty. Oh yeah, he'd seen you in many positions, but there was one specific simple fantasy that constantly appeared in his mind.

His hand reached for something above your head and next second you heard the sound of anime resonating in the room again. 

Now you were surprised.

"Turn around, on your belly." He uttered, his eyes looking at you but his thoughts were somewhere else, deep in the dark corners of his brain.

You bit your lip as you realized.

Mingi wanted you in the position he had seen you almost everyday. In the position he saw you also today before leaving and coming back to take the business in his hands. He wanted to fuck you while you lazily laid before the screen. In your oversized shirt, colorful socks and your ass up on display.

How many times did he have to control himself to not let everything go loose when he saw you like that? How many times did he fight his corrupted mind while you walked and laid around the house unaware? You would never know.

Turning around, obeying him, you let him know you take all of it – all his needs and fantasies.

He helped you position the pillow underneath your pelvis and with the kiss on the back of your head, he got up to get rid of his jeans.

You felt familiar excitement as you looked at the anime going off but all you heard was a sound of an unbuckling belt. Wetness between your thighs increased along with the temperature, and you felt dizzy. It seemed like you were about to stand in flames.

His weight sunk in your bed again and you shivered at his mouth close to your ear.

"What you're doing, baby? Just keep watching your show."

The man's act of confusion was too good, his unearthly deep tone making you swallow a moan. Was it a punishment for you being so mindless about what you were doing to him?  

His still wet fingers sunk in the flesh of your ass. He was massaging, squeezing and smacking it until he was satisfied. You looked at the screen but you saw nothing, entirely focused on his touch and sensation. You bit on the collar of your shirt as you felt Mingi sitting on your thighs like on a cushion. He put most of the weight on his hand but you still felt his hot skin pushing onto yours. 

"Mingi…" his name in your mouth carried heavy pleas. 

But he didn't answer. Instead you found yourself gasping at the velvet touch of his tip, rubbing between your cheeks and folds. 

Up and down. 

Up and down he spread his precum on all of you. 

You couldn't see it but you felt his impressive width. You dig your nails in the sheets as your hips begin moving. You needed him inside, demolishing you.

"You're so soft and wet." He praised you. "All for me to finally enjoy."

"I'm begging you…" you mumbled with your shirt still between your clenched teeth.

He seemed to like bringing surprises as he slid into you without a warning. 

"Aahh." You whimpered at the sudden stretch of your walls. 

He went into you slowly, letting you adjust to his size. Mingi felt you were engulfing him more and more with every push. 

"You're adorably tight." He wanted to sound playful but failed as your walls cramped around him and a set of pleasure went through him. "Shit."

He raised up a little on his knees and used your waist to support himself. Your lower body was caged, he could've done and was doing anything he wanted. He rolled his body at an even pace while going in and out of you. The bed rocked along with you, the frame hitting the wall behind it.

You face dropped from the screen as you tried to look at the cause of your state. Your loud moans, now drowned the sound of the anime in the background. They became even louder as his hand suddenly wrapped your ponytail around its wrist, pulling your head back. 

You were facing the screen again.

"Watch. The. Show, (y/n)." He hissed. 

And you were. You couldn't focus on the graphic, characters and especially not on the plot. All that filled your mind was the absolutely superior pleasure as your roommate was bulldozing you from behind. But still, your eyes were glued to the screen.

The tempo fastened as he let go of your hair. He pinned into you crazily, his balls smacking your sensitive clit from behind. Skin to skin, birthing clapping noises at an even pace. 

The grab on your waist tightened. His moves became desperate, chasing the promising high. Mingi began to lose it. So did you.

"I'm clo-ose" you breathed out, shutting your eyes.

The laptop closed again, cutting the irritating noise. All he wanted to hear was your moans and mumbling, signs he owned you.

"Cum all over my cock." He demanded. 

His hand was now positioned on both sides of your head. He raised up and with all his weight he fell onto you, sinking deeper than ever. His thick cock and every pulsating veins, adorning it, rubbed all the right places to make your sanity go to sleep and sexual madness to wake up. The power he was invading now you was too much for your body's ability to control.

"Min-gi, aah!" You came undone once again because of him and with the way he made you feel, you knew it wouldn't be the only time. 

Heavenly bliss made your eyes roll in the back of your head as it fell on the bed from withering pleasure. A string of saliva oozed from your parted lips. You grabbed firmly onto his wrists and just let him ruin you until he felt like the work was done.

"Fuuuck!" he moaned as your walls grabbed his hard cock in whole, sucking him mercilessly, "Fuck, (y/n). Fuck, fuck aah!"

He quickly pulled out of you as a part of his fantasy was finishing on your naked back. Humping himself onto your ass, he took his time to shoot all the hot load, painting your skin in white as well as watch you laying there, nicely fucked up by no one else but him.

Leaning his forehead to the back of your head, he inhaled your scent as if he breathed comfortably for the first time in a very long time.

"There's no way I'm keeping my hands to myself from now on." He said, having a hard time speaking from the tempo he graced you a minute ago, "No matter what you or I will be doing."

You stroke his forearm, enjoying his closeness. You had no strength to open your eyes so you just smiled.

"Same."

He kissed your head, having dozens of butterflies going crazy in your stomach. 

"What are we gonna do?" He broke the comfortable silence. Mingi tried to hide it but you picked it up - the worrying hue to his voice.

The bridge was burned, true. There was no return from what you two did. But you had a choice and made it. You chose to accept your needs and desires. 

"We'll figure something out." You hoped, keep smiling as every cell in your body was telling you it might be a start of something beautiful. 

After all, he saw the real you. The imperfect, flawed and raw you and it made him let his armour break. You were not letting him go that easily.

He smiled in the crook of your neck.

"Does it mean you will be walking naked around the apartment from now on?" 

You recreated the same joyful giggle that made him look inside your room and began it all.

"Maybe."

#ateez #ateez smut #ateez headcanons #ateez reactions #ateez imagines #ateez scenarios #ateez x reader #mingi smut #song mingi #ateez mingi #kim hongjoong #park seonghwa #kang yeosang #jeong yunho #choi san #jung wooyoung #choi jongho #kpop smut #hongjoong smut #seonghwa smut #yunho smut #yeosang smut #san smut #wooyoung smut #jongho smut

[memo-blogs]

Wish An Astarion x Tav (any gender) fic (wholesome/SFW) ((Also, contains spoilers for the game))

As the warm glow of the fading sun caressed the sky, he awoke. Alone, again. Astarion trekked up to the first floor window and peeked outside at the fading sun, longing more than for its warming rays. He looked at the note he had been carrying in his pocket again. The messy familiar scrawlings of his darling.

"There's something I have to do. Please wait for me. -Tav"

It had been days. Where were they? Why wouldn't they take him with them? His mood darkening with the sky, Astarion turned away from the window of his humble abode with Tav.

Or well, maybe "humble" wasn't the right word. Fabulous, well and tastefully adorned, just as Astarion liked it. Tav had smiled that adoring smile of theirs as they let Astarion decorate their home. "You always did have excellent taste, love", Tav had said as they helped Astarion put everything just so. They had been all around the world, looking for just the right drapes, cutlery, carpets, paintings and so on. Their home had two floors and a surprisingly large basement. The days spent finding and putting together the place were mundane and domestic, but full of so much warmth and gentleness that Astarion let a sigh escape his lips as he descended back to the basement floor, painfully aware.

Aware that while the house was exactly how he'd like his home to be, and that while he was excited to actually have a place to call home, it was just a place without Tav. Astarion walked the corridors adorning their nest with knick-knacks and memoirs from their travels together, chuckling at the vibrating dog-collar found in the Underdark, realising that the most at home he'd ever felt was with Tav. He opened their bedroom door and winced at the empty bed. Somehow, even though he had room to roam, and the right to leave the house every night, the empty loneliness of their shared bedroom reminded him of the year he spent in a coffin in isolation as punishment from Cazador. He shuddered. His back ached with the memory of abuse. But he also remembered how softly Tav had wrapped their arms around him, promising never again would he be trapped. And so far, Tav had more than kept their word.

He sat down on their bed. His and Tav's. Astarion absent-mindedly caressed the bedsheets, lost in thoughts.

Where was Tav? What could take this long? Why not take him with them? After all they'd been through together, didn't they trust him? Or… Maybe Tav needed to do something in daylight. Astarion felt the pang of loss. While being tadpoled by an elder brain had been a horror, he had enjoyed the unexpected side-effect of being able to walk in the sun, and missed it dearly. Maybe it was his elf blood that made him ache for the sun. Ah, but to be a vampire, and to walk in the sun! That had been power. That had been the first taste of delicious freedom for him.

Astarion let his thoughts wander back to Cazador's ritual of ascension. Would have sacrificing all those souls really been worth not having to thirst and to be free to walk in the sun? Gods. There were moments where he genuinely thought he'd give anything for that. Fearful, painful moments. And he was so close to giving in to his panic to never be caged ever again.

But then, he recalled Tav's hand in his. Their smiling face. Their selfless bravery in battle, shielding him, always having his back. The way Tav looked at him, how, even if Astarion was just joking that he only wanted vain empty compliments, Tav's responses were always sincere and full of affection. The gentle way they made love. Something about the way Tav loved Astarion was so true, he couldn't deny it. It was in everything Tav did. It was in the way Tav opened up about being a Bhaalspawn, and fearing they'd hurt him. How they weren't afraid of losing power or control or murdering innocents in general - Tav was more scared and willing to give up the one thing they truly loved, if it meant keeping him safe. Him. Astarion. A measly vampire spawn who, in the grand scheme of things, should have meant nothing to someone like Tav. Yet they had died at Bhaal's altar, giving up all that power to be a decent, regular person, and to have a chance to love Astarion. For Tav, it had been more important to die wanting to be good and to love than to give up their soul to live powerful but practically in slavery. Thank the gods Withers had been there to raise Tav as a mortal, no longer tied to Bhaal. To give them and Astarion a chance to live.

Astarion lied down on the bed. Tav loved him enough to set him free. Tav didn't want to own or control him. They never had. They had always let Astarion make his own decisions. Stood by Astarion when he confronted Cazador. Never telling him what to do, but supporting him through it all. If he had ascended, he would have been lost forever. He would have gained power, but he would have lost himself, and become a beast beyond reckoning… Probably very much like Tav almost did, like their sister Orin had. Astarion had read up on vampire lords after, and realised part of the reason Cazador had been so cruel wasn't only that his master Vellion had been equally brutal to Cazador… But also because the one edge spawns had over full fledged vampires, was that they were still capable of love. Of feelings. Cazador had hated him with a passion, partly because he couldn't feel anything else.

And what if it hadn't been him to have been swept up in the mindflayer ship? What if it had been one of his vampire siblings? If the roles had been reversed, and he was still stuck with Cazador while his sibling dealt with the Netherbrain with Tav, he would have hoped to have been given a chance to live as well. He chuckled. Gods. All those spawn down in the Underdark, wreaking havoc. Ah, to be a spider on the ceiling!

Astarion stared at the ceiling of their bed. Mindflayers and vampire lords weren't that different beasts, after all. Soulless opportunists looking to drain whatever they found useful until it no longer wasn't. Astarion turned his head to look at the empty pillow beside him. The longing and uselessness he felt almost made him want to be some emotionless monster. He got up, frustrated.

He felt alone and oddly fragile. More so with each passing day Tav was absent. He trusted Tav. They said they'll be back. So they would be. But Astarion was worried. He walked to Tav's bedroom table and picked up the Sending Stone. He had picked it up and put it down many times as the days passed. He rolled it in his hands again, pondering who to message.

He finally gave the Stone a squeeze, activating it, and uttered: "Shadowheart love, sorry to bother you on a wonderful night such as this, but do you happen to know where Tav is?" The Stone flashed, letting him know the message was sent. He waited for a response.

None came. Odd. They weren't exactly the bestest of friends with Shadowheart, but she had always given some sort of reply when he had messaged her. Was she missing with Tav? Did they take Shadowheart with them wherever they went, but not him? What was going on? He thought of their old companions. Wyll and Karlach were still in the Hells, as far as he knew. Halsin was rebuilding the Shadowlands now that the shadows were no more. Jaheira was rebuilding Baldur's Gate. Lae'Zel was long gone fighting for the freedom of her people. He didn't dare to even think what Minsc was up to, or how he'd respond to any message, really. This didn't leave him many options on who to try next. He squeezed the Stone again, activating it.

"Gale - would you be a dear and let me know if you have any idea where Tav is?"

The response came in surprisingly quick this time. "Astarion! A little busy right now - ack!" The response cut out.

Astarion sat back down on the bed, Sending Stone in hand. So Shadowheart was unresponsive and Gale, professor of magic in Waterdeep, was clearly in some kind of battle - what were the odds these two events were unrelated? What was Tav up to that they had called on Shadowheart and Gale, but left him at home to worry? He stood up and paced. What was going on?

He heard a weary sigh in his ear. "Astarion." It was Gale. He was sending a message back. Astarion stopped to listen. "Terribly sorry not to respond. In a bit of a spot of bother. We're helping Tav… Retrieve an item, and it is proving rather tricky. Not to worry! Shadowheart has patched up the worst of Tav's injuries and we're nearly done here. We'll bring Tav home tomorrow night once we've all rested from today's activities."

"Tav is hurt?" Astarion found himself nearly shouting. He contained himself and poised his next words to be more his usual lax self. "Do make sure to tell them to not drag any blood on my Calimshite carpets when you return. They were very expensive. I suppose I'll have dinner waiting after sunset. You still drink wine, don't you Gale?"

Gale chuckled. "Tav says they wouldn't dream of dirtying your precious carpets. And a fine wine with some cheese sounds wonderful. See you tomorrow."

Astarion put the Stone back on Tav's table. Honestly he couldn't care less about the stupid carpets or even this entire house - he just wanted Tav back safe and sound. Tav getting injured worried him, as he knew how annoyingly self-sacrificing they could be. Didn't they agree to look after themselves first after the whole mess with the Netherbrain? What was Tav thinking?

Astarion walked upstairs and put on a coat. He needed the air to calm his nerves, and a meal to quench his thirst. Plus, now he'd have to prepare dinner for at least three since Tav was coming home with an entourage. He thought back to where Tav placed the recipe for that strange sauce Gale kept harping on about, and with a put upon sigh determined to make his best effort to make the stupid thing. Tav would be happy if he tried to be kind to their friends. And if they brought Tav back to him alive, maybe slaving over a meal wasn't such a big thing.

The next sunset, Astarion felt a little pathetic, sitting by their door waiting. But he couldn't help it. He was anxious to see what Tav had gone out to retrieve that was apparently worth dying over. And mostly, just to see his beloved idiot again. It had been horribly lonely and empty without Tav. And honestly, just mind-numbingly boring. He had started preparing dinner early as he couldn't really sleep the day, waiting. It was simmering on their stove. He had gone a bit overboard with setting the table as well, picking out Tav's favourite flowers and bringing out their best cutlery for their friends.

Astarion gingerly stole a glance at the last rays of the sun diving underneath the horizon, and as soon as they disappeared, a teleportation circle promptly manifested in their yard. As expected, Gale walked out, looking behind him as if encouraging whomever was behind him to follow. Out came Shadowheart and surprisingly, Jaheira, supporting a limping Tav between them. As soon as they were through, Gale shut the portal behind them.

Astarion couldn't contain himself. He flung the door open and ran to hold Tav. He held them hard, as if afraid Tav would vanish if he let go. For a small moment, he was lost in Tav's familiar scent. The one he had come to associate with being loved and being home, and he managed to hold back his tears on how good it felt to have Tav near him again. Tav gently kissed Astarion on his head, laying their head on his. "Hello, darling. Miss me?"

Astarion suddenly felt acutely aware they weren't alone and broke off their embrace. He tried to ignore Jaheira's knowing smirk and Shadowheart's little smile as he turned to face the latter. "I thought Gale said you'd patch my precious knucklehead before sending them home. Why are they still injured?"

Tav looked embarrassed. "Well, uh-" They were cut off by Jaheira. "Because we only have so many healing spells to spare a day, spawn, and we did as much as we could after a night's rest for the reckless cub, Shadowheart and I." Jaheira smacked Tav on the shoulder, as if to reprimand them for needing healing in the first place. Astarion's eyes widened in shock. "How hurt were you?"

"Exhaustingly so." Shadowheart sighed. "For a moment there, I wasn't sure Tav was still among the living, or that we could even bring them back, but we did, thank Selûne."

"Aye, burnt to a crisp by that one trap we missed. Shame the temple was filled with so much undead-repelling magics that we couldn't risk bringing our favourite vampire spawn in there to check for all of them, but we managed."

Everyone stopped when they noticed how quiet Astarion got. There was an awkward silence that hung among the group, as everyone realised even without tadpoles to connect them that Astarion was not okay with the news given. Tav looked at him apologetically. "I'm sorry I didn't ask you to come along. I know you would have come even if I didn't ask if I said I was going. But, there is a reason for this." Tav signaled for Shadowheart and Jaheira to release them, and stood up on their own feet.

Astarion sighed. "Just don't do it again. Now, I've made enough dinner for all of you, and there are guest bedrooms upstairs if you want to stay the night. You can tell me all about it over dinner." Astarion walked up to Tav, offering them a hand to lean on as he led them home. Their friends smiled and walked behind them, grateful for the offer of a hearth, a meal and a warm home.

Tav whispered in his ear. "Just like that? You forgive me for taking off without you?" Astarion gave their arm a gentle squeeze. "Yes love. I said I trust you, and despite all the evidence to the contrary, I still do." They walked together into their home with their friends. "But please don't leave me alone like this again. I don't like being alone with my thoughts for so long." Tav kissed his pale cheek. "I promise. This was the last escapade I'll ever do without your blessing."

As they sat down for dinner Jaheira laughed. "Astarion, seems I have misjudged you yet again. Not only was I right in mistaking you for a good man, now I am beginning to believe I might mistake you for a great husband. This is a beautiful setup!"

"Oh hush, you old crone. It's just dinner among friends", Astarion quipped back, smiling despite himself.

Gale sniffed the air as he sat down. "Is that Hundur sauce I smell?" He took a small dab of sauce on his spoon and tasted it. "By Mystra, you even got the flavours just right! Astarion! I didn't know you had the makings of a cook."

"There are many things you don't know about me, darling."

Shadowheart piped in while breaking bread for herself. "Indeed - I for one, am having a hard time telling which one of you loves the other more, you or Tav. Especially after this stunt we helped them pull. It'd be disgusting if you two weren't so adorable together… What isn't a mystery though, is who decorated your house. Really, Astarion?"

"You're just jealous you don't have my sense of style, love."

They all smirked, Tav smiling the biggest of them all. "Thank you, everyone. For being here. For you three for helping me with this… We can talk about what we did, but I'd like to tell Astarion in private what we got out of it, if that's okay. And… Just, you are all my family and I love you all very much. I am honoured to be among such amazing friends, and could not ask for better ones. If you ever need anything, anything at all, call and you know I will be there."

A choked silence hung among them, as no one really knew what to add to such heartfelt words of affection. Astarion smiled. Tav was one-of-a-kind. And all his. Jaheira turned her head to wipe a tear. Shadowheart smiled. Gale cleared his throat. "Well, let's not waste our gracious chef's efforts by letting this feast go cold. Shall we?"

They ate together as mostly Gale and Shadowheart regaled them with the story of how they had found a long-abandoned temple of Lathander, and plunged into it's surprisingly sunny depths, with occasional snarky remarks from the wizened Jaheira of all the blunders they made along the way. Tav focused on the meal, following along the story, nodding in places in agreement on the retelling of their past few days, and laughing at everyone's quips and remarks on their mishaps while at it. Astarion wondered what was worth this much trouble. The Blood of Lathander was still with Shadowheart. What more could the sun god offer that was worth the risk? He also noted that Tav seemed oddly nervous, and avoided his gaze throughout the dinner, shyly blushing into their dinner whenever their eyes did meet. Astarion found himself anxious as well, every now and then letting his foot tap under the table before he caught himself, and composed himself once more.

Eventually dinner came to a close, and they saw their guests to bed. Shadowheart promised to finish healing up Tav as soon as she woke up and before Gale teleported them all back home. They wished their friends a good night.

Astarion gently helped Tav down into their basement bedroom, and then to take off their armour and clothes. Dawn was already approaching, which was their bedtime, as Tav had adopted Astarion's nocturnal schedule with ease. He noted the bruising, the burns, the barely closed wounds from the battles Tav had recently fought without him while undressing them. He got lost in softly caressing Tav's battered body, until Tav's hand found his, and gently held it. Astarion looked into Tav's eyes. "Alright. We're alone now - could you please tell me what was worth nearly killing yourself over, again? The suspense is killing me, darling."

Tav looked at their knees, searching for their words. "You know how you showed me your grave stone", they started.

"Of course love, how could I forget? We made such excellent love on top of it that night. I cannot think of a better way to celebrate my rebirth at the time", Astarion shot back with a devilish grin. "I fail to see how my faded grave stone has anything to do with your little adventure", he added.

"Well that's just it - your grave was so faded, we couldn't make out the day you died. Or the day you were born. And you still can't remember, right?"

"Well no, I can't and honestly, I don't really care to. That person is long gone and can stay that way for all I care. Why does it matter?"

Tav played with their hands in their lap. "Today's a year from the day we first met. I was afraid I wouldn't make it back on time, but I did." Tav used the bed post to stand up, and limped to their satchel. They took out an unassuming scroll case. "I figured, today could be both yours and my birthday. Since I can't remember my birthday either. It could be our anniversary. A day of celebration. Our day. And I went out and got the one thing I really, truly want to give you above all... I've been plotting ways to find one for some time now." Tav limped in front of Astarion and painfully but meticulously got on one knee. Astarion could feel his cheeks getting hot - a feeling he wasn't sure he was even capable of anymore, being undead and all.

Tav presented the scroll case to him. "The temple of the sun god had been rumoured to contain a Wish spell. I risked everything to find out if the rumour was true, and it was. With this scroll, anyone can wish for anything; once." Tav placed the scroll into Astarion's hands.

"I know how much you loved walking in the sun, Astarion. Your life was taken from you. Your freedom. Even the sun was stolen from you. I give you this scroll, so that you can wish for anything. You can wish to ascend without sacrificing all those spawn, you can wish to be rid of your vampiric curse, you could wish to rule the world - anything you want." Tav gently squeezed Astarion's hands, holding the scroll case, and looked up at him with their piercing eyes. "I love you, Astarion. And I always will. I give you ultimate freedom to choose anything you want, anything at all."

For a moment, it felt as if time stood still as Astarion fully absorbed what Tav just said. What they were offering him. Suddenly, he couldn't help but cry. He threw the scroll case into a corner of the room and knelt down to hold his precious Tav as close as he could. How had he gotten so lucky? After centuries of misery, how was he here, now, with this amazing creature? He kissed them deeply, passionately, as if trying to convey all his overwhelming affection and gratitude in one, two, no; dozens of kisses and caresses. He didn't care he was still crying. He didn't care if he seemed insane. He just wanted to feel Tav, and never let go. To tell them without words Tav meant more to him than anything he could ever bring home.

After awhile, he stopped and they leaned their foreheads together, holding hands. Astarion noticed Tav was crying too, but Tav gave him a little smile nonetheless. There was an unanswered question in Tav's eyes -

What did Astarion want to Wish for?

Astarion kissed Tav on the forehead once more. "You are a reckless idiot." He got up and picked up the scroll case, and took out the scroll. Such a mundane looking piece of paper, to give out a moment of godlike powers to mere mortals. He played with it as if it was nothing. Tav smirked. "I know. So love, what are you going to use it for?"

Astarion grinned back at Tav. "Oh, I don't know. World domination does sound like an awful lot of work, doesn't it? And I have never heard of a happy vampire lord, now that I think of it. Powerful, to be sure - but not happy."

"I could wish for a sea of puppy dogs and kittens for you", Astarion joked. Tav laughed. "I got the scroll for you, smooth brain. I already have everything I need - what I want, is you to be free, in whatever way you want to be free." Tav dropped their joking demeanor and picked up their surprisingly disarming sincerity. "With or without me, I want you to be happy. You helped me find freedom and regain myself and my life back. Without you, I'd still be a slave to Bhaal's endless fervour to murder, or a mindflayer. You believed in me when no one else did, and supported me through bouts of madness. I owe my life to you… So I want you to choose yours. And whatever you choose, know I'll always love you for carrying me through my darkest days."

Astarion looked at Tav. He didn't need to connect through the no-longer-present tadpole to know they meant every word. He looked down at the scroll of Wish in his hands. He could be anyone. He could do anything. He could be the most powerful, influential and beloved man in all of Faerûn - all he had to do was say the words.

The scroll knew he meant to make his Wish. It glowed in anticipation. He smiled at Tav. "I wish to be cured of vampirism and to be an elf that's capable of walking in the sun with his beloved."

#my writing #baldur's gate 3 #bg 3 #fanfic #bg 3 fanfic #astarion #astarion fic #wholesome #dnd story #vampire #fantasy #writing #i don't know what more tags to give this #enjoy?? #just glad i got it out of my system lol #astarion x tav #astarion romance #astarion x reader #astarion ancunin #headcanon #mah boi

[yourdakg]

Donation Found!

Remember Ryder? The SoCal pretty boy who was depressed that his life was a vapid, superficial, and party focused existence? He contacted Turnaround Technologies to ask, nay plead for a new body and a new life. See his Donation Request Form.

If only it were that simple. Turnaround Technologies utilizes some of the most advanced science on the market. When a body is fully adjusted, it's a slow and sometimes torturous process! If it was as simple as switching brains, that would be one thing. But the subjects have to physically transform into one another, and then brainwaves are overwritten. Chemistry, genetics, biology, and psychology are all involved in this elaborate process.

So Ryder had to come up with the $325,000 fee. Luckily, he had money saved and he was able to sell off the red Mustang convertible and his yellow Yamaha Sport Bike to meet the target. The final straw was giving up the deed to his WeHo apartment. Don't tell him, but his donor bought the items! Isn't that funny? He covered the rest with personal loans! Well, a little bit of debt won't hurt.

Let's remind you of where Ryder is starting his journey:

And now let's the see information plate for his donor. I think he'll be very pleased! After this, he'll never have to worry about being surrounded by vapid, beautiful people and fending off pesky pool party invites! Yes, this is the ideal swap partner for Ryder.

Meet Dr. Pervus Fondler. And wouldn't you know it? Dr. Fondler was a doctor in Ryder's hometown! They actually know each other. The good doctor cares very deeply for Ryder and was pained when he heard about his current circumstances. He decided that his job as a physician meant he had to step up and give the ultimate sacrifice! You know what they say: First Do No Harm.

Donor Statement: While I am nervous about the process, I am confident that I will give Ryder a new future, one where he won't have to worry about all that vanity and his gym obsession. True freedom for the boy!

Thank you, doctor, for going the extra mile for your patients. Turnaround Technologies will prepare the Exchange Chambers. Both subjects will be stripped down and cleansed before being placed in metallic, moisture wicking bikinis while our technicians prepare for the process:

Now that Ryder is dressed and the drugs are injected into his system, it's time to introduce him to his generous benefactor. I hope he has a positive reaction to the kind of man he will become. Let's check in!

Patient Statement: No! Holy shit! No, not Pervus the Perv! You can't put me in that. Don't force me into that body! I'd be going from a perfect ten to a zero. Please! No... LET GO. Please, oh my God. No, I thought it would be another buff guy like me. I change my mind, I changed my mi--**UMPH HRRMPH**

It's not clear why Ryder objected so strongly to his partner. Maybe it was the shock of knowing who the doctor was from earlier in his life. At any rate, he paid the fee and signed the paperwork so there is, quite literally, no going back. Swaps of this nature are once in a lifetime and, of course, quite permanent.

Subject had to be forcibly gagged and sedated.

Add another $125,000 for the service. Ryder sure is going to pay a lot of money for his new life!

When he came to in the chamber, Ryder was pounding on the door. I think he was crying. His oversize genitalia were mashed against the glass in his silver pouch. It was quite the sight. When the whirr of the machine began and the paralyzing blue light hit, his eyes went crossed. He fell backwards and pumped his hips in the air. Well, the erection is to be expected. I've heard the process somewhat erotic, though painful.

It takes a couple days and the exchange unstable during that time, but I am happy to report the following:

Donor Report: I feel good. Very good. I'm probably going to move to SoCal, sort of take over Ryder's apartment. I'll probably start using his name now too. Don't wanna confuse people. I don't even have my old, perverted urges. I hope he's comfortable with the mental traits foisted on him. Oh... he wants to take picture of me? Ha, okay. I'll flex for $100. Recipient Report: What do you mean I can't go back *whimper* why do I feel so strange. I'm already out of breath. Give it back! What do you mean a name change is included in the package *sob* MY NAME IS PERVUS NOW??!?! Oh. I have to take his medical practice in my shithole hometown? Oh God! I just... oh goodness, seeing it from this angle it's such a fine body. So tight and firm! At least flex for me, my boy? A little. So I can snap a few pics and... use them later. Eehehe. Oh God, what have I become?

#body swap #male body swap #male transformation #muscle theft #mind swap #body switch #permanent #young to old #old to young

[tabernacleheart]

Jesus teaches us that he who commits sin is the slave of sin; that is to say, that an alien power has captured and is coercing the wrongdoer. That teaching does not destroy responsibility, but it kindles hope. A foreign foe, who has invaded the land, may be driven out of the land, and all his prisoners set free, if a stronger than he comes against him. Christianity is called gloomy and stern, because it preaches the corruption of man’s heart. [Rather,] is it not a gospel to draw a distinction between the evil that a man does, and the self that a man may be? Is it not better, more hopeful, more of a true evangel, to say to a man, ‘Sin dwelleth in you,’ than to say, ‘What is called sin is only the necessary action of human nature’? To believe that their present condition is not slavery makes men hopeless of ever gaining freedom, and the true gospel of the emancipation of humanity rests on the Christian doctrine of the bondage of sin.

Alexander MacLaren

#this is a vital distinction #true freedom is found only in god #Freedom from sin #the terror of sin #human nature #do not despair #Alexander MacLaren

[riseofamoonycake]

I just saw the leaks of chapter 84 of ROR and im IN LOVE WITH ANUBIS!! hes so cute i seriously need a fanfic or him x reader headcanons☹️💗

Sorry for the late, I was doing... things. And this is things, lol

The image used was created by @hanaiikiki!

Egyptian Dreams

🐶Pairing: Anubis x Archeologist!female reader

🐶Warnings: mention of kinks (breeding), sex (oral, penetration), Anubis knows very well to use that tongue of his 

🐶

You try to breathe, really, but it is not easy; it is never easy with Anubis.

And even if you have met ― or rather, have found ― the God of Cemeteries and Necropolis, the Guardian of the Dead and the Lord of Cinopolis, for just under a few months, it is already enough. And that is already enough, given that right now it is the twentieth time that his hands grab your hips and squeeze you until you lose your breath, they drag you to a corner of the museum where, mysteriously, in these moments no one ever passes, and here they lift your shirt to allow their owner to lick your belly, running his long tongue in a circle around your navel or on your lower abdomen, and, once your trousers or skirt and underwear are lowered, also on your pubic area, savoring the skin and the sweat that furrows it in slow movements of that all too skilled muscle.

Every time you feel his unstoppable torturing licks, faster and faster as your breathing becomes more erratic and you can’t hold back any moans, with those few residues of lucidity that Anubis doesn’t take away, you think back to how much this is a very different behavior from what you imagined as a child, when you dreamed of marrying the god and forgot everything for your tender fantasies; now that these become true moment by moment, but losing their innocence, you can’t help but feel yourself trembling from top to bottom, and becoming weak.

«Great Anubis, the presentation…»

«Shhhh, relax, relax, relax! Can I lift your gown? Yes, yes, yes?»

You observe the large golden eyes with which Anubis, crouching in front of you, begs you to accept and licks his fangs with the same adorable expression of a puppy, and you nod without too much hesitation. You have been saying yes to him for nights and days, since that dawn when you returned from the archaeological excavations of Karnak and found the god on your bed; there are nights and days that you allow him freedom of action and destruction on your body, and that you do not return to Karnak.

Maybe you are wrong, but something tells you you’ll never see it again, not alone.

Anubis’ tongue takes you away from your mind: as long as he lifts the skirt of your dress and grabs your thighs, opens them and presses his mouth against your intimacy, licking your lips with indescribable energy and assaulting your clitoris with ferocious hunger and the firm goal of making you pass out again and again, but not before making you cum at least as many times as there are fingers on one hand. Even better if both. Even more when his nails tease your most intimate lips, making sure to scratch thoroughly.

You bite your fingers with desperation and try to overcome the strength to scream, howl and moan, squinting in pleasure while the god sucks your folds, nibbles them with the tips of his fangs and licks the small drops of blood he spills out, kisses your opening repeatedly and starts sucking and licking again, then suddenly withdraws and looks at you with a frown and a tear in the corner of his eye. «Come oooon, I told you to relax! It is only to help you a bit before your presentation! What is going on?»

You breathe hard, body shaking with the effort of resisting, and sigh. «Great Anubis, I… hmmm…»

His hands are faster than your doubts: they take you by the waist, lift and hold you to the body of the god, who brings you to an even darker and more secret corner, and here Anubis places you on the pedestal of a statue to him dedicated, nails digging into your soft thighs as he massages and pinches them.

«Do you want me to fuck you unconscious? Could it help you?»

The god’s voice, now lower and calmer, makes you blush to the tips of your hair; and you giggle as a new wave of shivers and sweat slides down your back and neck, a reason to laugh for Anubis, who doesn’t even give you the privilege of a moment of peace. «Don’t you remember, my darling? We have to give your daughter a sister or a brother… You have agreed to this a lot, a looooot of times», his voice rages and his tongue follows, licking your earlobe and into it as he leans over you.

«I can’t show up late or in disarray! What will they think of me?»

Anubis smiles in the semi-darkness, letting his canines and eyes shine, and urges you to throw your head back to kiss your throat. The next moment, he pulls you closer to him and the grip on your flesh increases, as does the pressure against your intimacy the moment after he calmly enters you. Many things can be said about God, but not that he doesn’t know how to be kind when he wants. It is the rhythm he takes on afterwards and the thrusts with which he destroys you little by little, the fun part.

«You’ll be great, Y/N… you are my favorite archeologist, this museum is here thanks to you, the statue that is watching us ― OH, IT’S MEEE ― was discovered by you! So don’t worry, okay? Lean against me, my lotus flower, I’m going to be a little rougher now⁓»

Even if you wanted to reply, you wouldn’t be able to; and instead you obey, pressing your chest against Anubis’, hugging his neck and resting your head against his shoulder, closing your eyes as he pushes himself further and further into you, savoring your warm walls against his member.

«Good girl… the star of the evening deserves a reward. You are always great, you just have to believe it and trust yourself more, okay? Hmmmm, yes, rotate your hips this way! GO GO GO! YOU ARE GOING TO MAKE ME FAINT FOR SURE!”

You giggle again, then rub your nose against Anubis’ scented amber skin and moan in his ear as his nails mark your back and the nape of your neck, and your body jolts, squirms and trembles in pleasure with every firm movement. The

God’s hands quickly move to your belly and grab the flesh, squeezing it as if they wanted to shape and venerate it as only he knows how to do. «I like your belly sooo muuuch…», Anubis yelps in rapture, almost whimpering, «I want to see our baby right now! A baby for us! A baby!»

«You’re enough as a puppy― AH!» You bite your lips and moan, feeling the full effects of that deep thrust inside you, and relax immediately afterwards. «I deserved it…»

The god bites the base of your neck firmly, then kisses it and smiles, blowing against your sweaty skin. «Welcome to the real Egypt, my darling», chuckles Anubis, gently lifting your head and tracing your throat with his fangs, and then licking your under chin, his eyes full of lustful light and wide open to trap your whole figure, «where you are allowed to live every dream you have.

Now… let’s give this lovely archeologist an artifact to work on⁓»

#record of ragnarok #shuumatsu no valkyrie #ror #snv #record of ragnarok anubis #ror anubis #snv anubis

[silver99johnlocked]

During season 2, after Jack finally accepts to believe in Will, they plot against Hannibal. Their plot is based on Will gaining Hannibal's trust by getting close to him one more time, but this time having no secrets between the two of them. Will makes it clear to Hannibal that he knows the truth and says that he still wants to be with him.

So basically Will's trying to pass this image to Hannibal: 'I know you're a killer and even though I wanted to turn you in before, it was only because you framed me and I got pissed. But to be honest, now that the anger is gone, I've realised that I'm actually really interested in making killing associations with you, just like you told me about all along. We could go off together and leave this play pretend life behind us so we can be our true selves and I can embrace the new person you made out of me.'

Hannibal is absolutely thrilled about it. He buys it. He fiercely wants it to be true. That's why when he finds out that Will is about to betray him, he gives him little second chances just to be sure. Because he doesn't want to believe Will would do that to him. He couldn't stand that.

The thing is that Will actually really cares about Hannibal. He's not a 'black or white' person. He inhabits the grey area of morality. He knows what's the right thing to do, yet he found in Hannibal the only person who truly understands and respects him. He can't simply betray Hannibal like that. That was never his plan. He chose his own side. He couldn't be 100% on Jack or Hannibal's side. He chose to play by the law but still give Hannibal a chance to escape. He calls and warns Hannibal that the police are coming. He's literally telling him to go and be safe.

What Will didn't predict was how much Hannibal cared about him. He only realizes that when he arrives at his house in 2x13. Abigai is alive. The reason why he never entirely took Hannibal's side, the reason why he couldn't forgive him.

Will asks her about Hannibal and he's right there behind him. The first thing he says: "You were supposed to leave". He's angry. He didn't want all this mess. He knew it would put people he cared about in danger but most of all, he wanted Hannibal free and safe. Even more so now. Maybe he would even join him after. But this isn't right, why would Hannibal risk everything like this? It doesn't make sense.

Hannibal: "We couldn't leave without you"

Will's entire face changes when he hears that. He underestimated the influence he had on Hannibal. He thought he was a pure psychopath, incapable of feelings, yet here he is, putting his own life at risk for the sake of another human being. But that's not everything. The cherry on the top is when Hannibal reveals that he wanted Abigail to be a surprise. He cared about Will so god damn much that he wasn't able to kill her because he knew how important she was to Will. He cared about Will so god damn much that he was willing to leave his entire (loner, detached, successful) life behind in order to flee and live as a family.

But that couldn't happen, because Will betrayed him. He made a place for their family, he actually made a romantic gesture but Will surprised him by choosing not to go with him. He chose Jack's side even if he did warn Hannibal about it. That detail doesn't matter. The only thing that matters is that Will didn't choose to be with Hannibal.

Hannibal: I let you know me, see me. I gave you a rare gift, but you didn't want it.

Will: Didn't I?

Hannibal: You would deny me my life.

Will: No. No, not your life. No.

Hannibal: My freedom then, you would take that from me. Confine me to a prison cell. Do you believe you could change me the way I changed you?

Will: I already did.

And that's the moment, my friends. Will really only realized that there and then but he now knows that yes he did change Hannibal. He made Hannibal actually truly care for him. Hannibal made Will see his dark side but Will made Hannibal see his good side. They have blended so much that each internalised a part of the other. And when Will states this, Hannibal can't accept it. He, in all his glory, cannot accept to be changed by anyone, not even Will. He turns to pettiness to prove a point, like a child throwing a tantrum. In an anger attack, he does the unforgivable (by undoing his good deeds) and kills Abigail, simply to try and prove Will wrong. It's low, it's difficult, and that's why he's left heartbroken, because he knows immediately he fucked up. He knows Will will probably never forgive him for it.

At the end of the episode Will is dying next to Abigail and he is still able to see the wounded stag as a representation of how deeply heartbroken Hannibal is by everything that has happened. He's pure empathy after all, he sees through Hannibal's facade right into his heart. And he also aches for their separation because now he understands what it all really meant to Hannibal. He wasn't simply playing catch with the police, he put his body and soul into their escape because he really thought he had found someone with whom he could share his life without having to hide his true self. Will's betrayal cuts deep because it's not on his ego, it's on his very soul.

#hannibal #nbc hannibal #hannibal x will #will graham #will x hannibal #hannibal lecter #hannigram #hannibal meta #season 2 #hannibal s2 #hannibal series #hannibal fandom #hugh dancy #mads mikkelsen

[yorsgirl]

Yan!Heian!Sukuna and with Y/N?

Lately, whenever Darling got pregnant she ended up having countless miscarriages, the longest lasting at least 3 months, Sukuna began to suspect these countless coincidences.

He doesn't care about these losses since he didn't want to share Y/N with some brat, but he found it very strange that every time she got pregnant resulted in a miscarriage, so he started investigating and finally found out why this was happening.

He discovered that Y/N was causing her own miscarriages, as she knew that the last thing the world needed was Sukuna's descendants, so he finally confronts her but with that damn psychological terror that he loves to do to her.

Oh my, I love love love this idea!!

I kinda went out on this one, but I hope I did justice to what you were aiming at. Hope you like it :) Also I am sorry for being so late

Playing God

Yandere!Ryomen Sukuna x Fem!Reader

Synopsis: It was a gamble, he was willing to make. To keep you with him, forever, as he wanted. Needed. You had to realize that no other heaven except his arms would be comforting. Even if that meant, breaking your very soul.

Tropes: Dark Romance, Historical fiction, Angst

Warnings: Implied nsfw(forced), mentions of pregnancy, miscarriage, abduction, cannibalism and isolation. Trauma, mild stockholm syndrome, yandere themes, minor character death(s), gore, gaslighting, manipulation, misogyny, implied cannibalism, blood, degradation(non-kinky), patriarchal society, unhealthy relationship, implied child birth.

General warnings: Yandere!True form!Husband!Sukuna, Wife!Reader, Heian Era, both Sukuna and reader are a red flag on their own, usage of nicknames, no mentions of y/n.

Word Count: 9.7k ( Just when I thought AFW2 was long, I write this... I know its too much but trust me, I needed to. There was just so many things which I couldn't miss out.)

A/N: This is the first request which I worked on, so idk if I did it up to your standard. I sincerely apologize, if this isn't what you wanted. + I hope its similar to what you wanted. Thanks for the wait and request.

You were digging your own grave.

So you shouldn't have been surprised that your wish would be granted. Yet, if you could have one wish then you'd wish for freedom but no- freedom was a forfeited dream, far beyond your reach. Consideration of that one would never be fruitful. You are trapped even in your dreams.

Playing with fire only gets you burnt.

For long, you played this game and this- this was your compensation. For everything you had done until now, all you are returned with was abandonment. Not that supposedly, betrayal, yes. More appropriate.

Flames surrounded you, crawling up your skin, the screams piercing your ears, your chest heaved up and down. Gaze, once settled on your hearth, now all you saw was the burning hut, the crackling of embers reached your ears. Attire and hands stained with blood of the insolent. The warning shouldn't have been taken lightly. Should have known, the extent of his power.

Eyes held terror, fright, regret- whatever you could name. The multitude of names you received seemed no more than a distant dream, nowhere to be found. All were running away - expectable.

You expected calamity, but you were calm.

Everything went down in flames. Save for you, you weren't burning. Not an spark touched your skin. Was it the distance or the control? Who knows. But one confirmation which you held was that - tonight you won't die. Not so soon either.

Careful, not all Gods are worshipped.

The words rang in your ears and as if on cue, you found him again. In this reverie of madness, he held your sight when you attempted to turn - The eyes tinted with crimson.

.

"I am sorry for your loss, m'lady."

You had seen it all.

You had your fair share of encounters, received news and such. Women losing their mind and sanity after delivered with a news this devastating. Notably, no woman would feel any bliss after knowing that they had lost their child. Lost the chance of motherhood before experiencing it. Violent outbursts was the most probable outcome.

"This is a hard time," The midwife spoke softly. "Yet, you shouldn't neglect your health."

You perceived the softness to be fear. She must have had dealt with situations like these, most of them traumatizing, you assumed. Perhaps, she expected the same from you too. You tore your gaze off her, leaning back on your bedframe, "I'd like to be left alone."

Your declaration was answered with compliance. Offering a humble bow, she bid you farewell, walking out of your chambers. Once her footsteps seized, you finally let your guard down. Breathing out a sigh of relief, you laid back down on your bed.

"Good riddance," You muttered to yourself. Moments of such vulnerability wasn't rare – considering you were served with loneliness, lately. Save for the times you spent in the presence of Sukuna. His decree, one might say. Your attention shouldn't be wasted on anyone but him.You scoffed recalling his words. Involuntarily, your hand stroked your belly, the corner of your lip curled up.

Once a house to life, given by your husband; now lay vacant from your doing.

A twisted sense of pride swelled up in your chest, a wide grin stretching on your face. You were successful in your quest, again. Mercilessly, you uprooted the seed of your Husband's lineage. Perhaps, you've truly gone sick.

Yet, this revolt of feelings were miles lesser than the repugnant you encountered when you realized your first pregnancy. You were on the brink of clawing out the creature growing in your womb. You'd have torn it apart with while revelling in the joy of watching its blood drip down on the face of Earth. If not for Sukuna's presence in the room, you might've gone through it.

You lost a fragment of yourself, that day.

Throwing up countless times, dizziness, nausea, even losing your consciousness while walking down - no, they weren't pregnancy side effects. More so, the outcome of the stress accumulating in you.

Sickening. His kin you'd have cradled in your body. To have born and grow up into a revolting, merciless creature like his father. To take up place in your womb, your flesh and blood combined with his, a living proof of your plight - disgusting.

Never. You'd never let that happen.

You'd never succumb to such monstrosity.

You had already given up your freedom, your dignity, your alight life to Sukuna in exchange of the lives you held dear. The lives back in your ancestral village, home to your kin.

You were affirmed, an heir of Ryomen Sukuna would never be birthed from you.

Speak of the devil, he appears.

An overwhelming familiar aura surrounded your very being, the doors to your chamber slid open, your captor, your husband strolled inside. Even his mere presence held the malevolence in him. You attempted to rise from your position at his arrival.

"Sit." He commanded.

You silently obeyed his order, keeping your gaze settled on your lap, the energy had your stomach churning with trepidation; at times when you didn't do anything either. And this time, you were guilty. Two moments passed in silence until he spoke.

"I heard from the midwife."

You took in a sharp breath, swallowing a lump in your throat. It was the same ordeal, like the first two times. Yet, you were a tad bit calm since the previous encounters. Probably, due to the fact you were getting used to this role. In this past moons, you had developed into the wife, he was carving you out to be. Giving him just the reactions he wanted, for that saved you a lot of anguish and pain. Even if it came at the price of your self-respect. This was the only way.

With your head hung low, you spoke, "Forgive me, my lord. I am incapable of bearing you an heir. I-It must have been my fau-"

"Not another word."

You instantly stiffened up, his deep voice causing chills to run down your spine. Did you make an error? Was he aware of your tumultuous acts? Was the play not convincing enough?

He held your chin, forcing you to look up at him. All of his four, red eyes bore into you. You bit on your inner cheek, blood coursing in your veins - steadfast.

They say, your fear start to vanish once you've remained in the source of their vicinity too long. That statement is false. For even after staying with your captor for almost two years, you still held your fear.

"The one at fault bore consequences."

That's when you were hit with the faint stench of blood from him. Another one perished. You took the wild guess of it being the midwife. However, instead of amplifying fright, it was lessened. You wouldn't be on the receiving end of his wrath.

"You aren't at fault, wife."

Oh, but you were.

Sukuna held your gaze, cupping your cheek; the rough pad of his thumb trailed a line on your skin. His tone and grip were surprisingly gentle. "There's no need to apologize."

The corners of your eyes crinkled down, you lean into his touch. You assume, it's a good move as you noted the flicker of emotion in his eyes. "It's the third time, my lord. Perhaps, I bear some shortcomings."

"What nonsense," He rolled his eyes. "There's none, not in my eyes. Don't fill your head with such fickle thoughts." He paused for a moment before continuing, "Is that understood?"

He wasn't one for affirmations but maybe- just maybe it was his attempt at comfort, you supposed. The previous losses must had him learning, the threads of condolence. Still, for you, they'd never mean anything less than empty words. The last thing you wanted was to be comforted by your tormentor. You'd rather step into hell willingly.

But you were living under his wing. You have to play according to his whims. You nodded. "Yes, my lord."

His hand left your face, dropping to his thigh. He looked at you, as if sizing you up. You had to keep yourself from making any unnecessary movements. Sukuna wanted you composed, whatever the situation. (Except the times when he bedded you, you were allowed to scream, cry and thrash around then. Cause you were trapped under his immense strength, struggles were futile).

After a while, he asked, "Any wishes?"

You chewed on your bottom lip, eyes flickering down then back to him. You let out a breath, before continuing. "May I visit the shrine... this evening?"

Silence.

You were contemplating whether you had offended him, somehow. Previously, he did allow for your little trips, you wondered if his patience was running thin cause of your repeated incapability of bearing him an heir. Maybe, you ran out of luck.

You were about to mutter an apology but then a smug grin spread across his lips, "Why so?" He asked.

"To-" You swallowed a lump, preparing to answer the practiced dialogue. "To offer prayers for–"

"Why grieve for someone who didn't even take form?" He cut you up, raising an eyebrow. For a tad moment, he sounded curious. It broke into a cruel chuckle, "You humans would make a funeral out of anything, yes?"

If you held an ounce of sympathy then you wouldn't question.

You wanted to say but you knew better. Besides, you still have to keep up the act of being his loyal wife. Heaving a out a deep breath, you replied, "I suppose." You paused, running the tip of your tongue over your lip.

"I'd pray that I can bear you an heir the next time, my lord."

Nay, more so: I'd pray that you receive your end soon, my lord.

Sukuna watched you. No, not look. He watched, like a predator. Then, his lips cracked into a sinister grin. "You've a way with your words, wife."

It caught you off guard. You raised an eyebrow, attempting to voice out your confusion. "What do-"

"I will accompany you."

.

"Sukuna sama, the herbalist you asked for, has arrived."

Sukuna spared a glance at Uraume, who knelt by his feet.

"Bring him."

As on cue, they rose up from their stance, pivoting around towards the door. It parted, two curses had a man in their grasp as he struggled to break free. His eyes widening with terror when it fell on the King, sitting atop his throne.

The man was pushed down to his knees, face meeting the floor in a loud slam. His scuffles were in vain against such power, he knew that. Still, in a situation of life and death, rationality takes it's leave.

Sukuna clicked his tongue in annoyance. All he wanted was some herbalist to answer the flurry of questions in his which had him restless for the past few days. Did this scum think he'd be killed? Maybe he would be, if he deems it necessary or he proves to be useless.

What had him restless was your miscarriages. Counting the most recent would make it a fourth. Where did he go wrong? You were kept in utmost luxury, no toils whatsoever. Still, what was wrong?

—》《—

"Perhaps, there's some faults in her highness."

"Keep your voice down, Mira. Someone may hear you."

"I am a lot quite... but tell me, don't you find it strange? How come she has lost all of her children?"

"I- I suppose. Perhaps, motherhood is not written in her fate."

"Or so, she's simply incapable."

—》《—

Safe to say, those were the last words they uttered before they were turned into a mash of flesh and blood.

Sliced into pieces that even trying to make a proper corpse out of the remnants weren't possible.

At times, Sukuna wished he held the power to bring back someone to life. Then maybe, he'd have given those servants a death, more worthy. Maybe, ripping out their limbs, piece by piece. First the bones would break, ripped from the ligaments, then it'd be the muscles; that was easy to just tear out. And after that happened, he could have just sewn up the blobs of flesh again and repeat the process until they learn their lesson or the life leaves them again.

He deduced the latter would be more probable. Still, it would be fine. They deserved that.

Speaking ill of you in his palace, in his vicinity, in his world was prohibited. A sin, in the words of humans. And a sin never goes unpunished.

You - his consort, his queen, you were heavenly. There isn't a fault in you, it's some external factor, must be. But he can't let go of his growing suspicion either.

Sukuna detested children, it was a known fact. Always ending their lives first, whenever he set foot in a village. They were of no use to him, unless they were served to him on his platter. He couldn't deny, their flesh was flavourful.

Even though, he held great disdain for them, he couldn't help but desire a kinship with you. With the price of letting go of your undivided attention? Hmm, doesn't sound too great. He assumed, he can hire a wet nurse, just in case. Still, he desired to see you round with his child, feet swollen as you struggled to walk around. You do not have to worry, he, your husband would joyfully oblige in carrying you in his arms. You were more than perfect, he couldn't even imagine just how beautiful you'll look, during and after carrying your child.

It was destined. You'd extend his lineage or no one else.

You were flawless then why were you causing such errors? Contradicting. It was his question until he started to take a note in your behaviour, and he found...

Sukuna stood up from his throne, walking down the steps of bones, presumably of the ones he killed. They act as a pretty show piece, according to him.

The court resonated with his footsteps, each one carrying a promise of death. The man's struggles seized once he was harshly pulled up by his hair, his eyes met with Sukuna's.

"Yo-your high–ness," The man fumbled with his words, a spine chilling sensation going down his frame.

"Time's wasting," Sukuna said, his glare pointed. The fury evident, though his exterior was calm. "Comply if you don't wish death."

The man nodded frequently, his fingertips trembled with anticipation and horror. "Ye-yes, your highness. It's an honour to s-serve you." The man fell to his feet as he was dropped. Sukuna dismissed the extra company with a wave of his hand.

"Rise," He declared.

The man still on his knees, raises his head. "What can I- I do for you, your highness?"

—》《—

"May I make a request, my lord?"

Sukuna's eyes flickered to you, yours not meetinh his. Knelt before him, you gracefully poured the sake in his ochoko.

"Speak."

He marked the squinting in your irises, fingertips trembled when you put the vessel down. Your shoulders rose and fell before you gazed at him, reluctantly. He couldn't help but find your antics inhumanely amusing. 

"Would you be kind enough... to bring me this-" You paused for a fleeting moment. "This herb called... aloe vera?"

—》《—

"Aloe vera," Sukuna tilted his head aside, the upper pair of arms crossed over his chest. "What use does it have?"

"We-well, my lord it's used for heal-healing purposes, burns, cuts, rashes... it heals injuries, yes." He answered, taking a gulp. There was other uses too yet his head was alike a blank canvas, before such a formidable strength. He wasn't even aware if it was satisfactory or why the King of Curses needed to know about such a measly plant. But if it meant, he gets to live another day, then he'll just give what he could offer. "I-It can also be used to– to make me-medicated food. N-not a delicacy... I might add."

Sukuna raised an eyebrow, "That's it?"

"N-no, my lord. There- it can cure diges-"

"In pregnancy."

The man stiffened, his mouth parting a tad bit. A whisper leaving his lips, "Yo-your highness...?"

Pregnancy, menstruation, considered taboo. A matter regarding women, spoken in the inner chambers, the men should remain ignorant. A topic whispered in ears not spoken aloud in any hall, let alone the royal court. Certainly, Sukuna was aware of this societal construct, yet he didn't care. The society and its idiotic rules could go to hell. He just needed answers.

"Speak," Sukuna's voice was louder, deeper when the man before him fidgeted in his spot due to discomfort - on speaking such a topic.

"It-Its a- your highness, I d-don't think you-"

"Bastard," His fumbling was interrupted by Sukuna. The warning evident in his profanity. His face grew darker, the four irises glowing with impending danger akin Satan himself. "If you so much as want to live, fucking speak."

The man's blood ran cold as on cue, face turning a shade paler as if winter had started to pool in. Tears prickled the corners of his eyes, "Forgive me, your highness! I will speak, I will- yes- aloe vera its-" He heaved out a deep breath, an attempt to slow down his beating heart. "Any fo-form of it is ill-suited during pregnancy... it can cause... cause pe-pelvic haemorrhage leading to... to  misc-"

"Miscarriage?"

"Yes, miscarriage... can lead to miscarriage, your highness."

A profound silence prevailed. Not a soul spoke neither was a footstep heard. Not a leaf rustled or the howling winds tapped on the window pane - assumed, mother nature had halted its elements from making any noise.

The stakes were high yet an flicker of courage alighted in the man as he raised his head up to glance at Sukuna, "My lor-"

The man's head tumbled down before he could even complete.

He couldn't scream, he couldn't beg, he couldn't apologize, he couldn't even blink. All he could do was watch. Watch as his beheaded body fell limp before his eyes. Watch as the blood poured out like waterfalls staining the carpet with its hues. The red marred bones protruded out amidst the flesh, globs of blood was gushing out of his severed voice box. His body jerked, the remnants of conscious nerves trying to survive.

It was a neat cut. A heavenly sight.

The world started to blur in. And before he knew it, the light was gone from his eyes.

Sukuna didn't even spare a glance as he marched out of his court.

Uraume approached the body, a few maids accompanying them. They casted a disapproving glare at the corpse.

"Not edible, dispose of it."

.

You didn't see or hear from Sukuna for a week.

He didn't visit your chambers at night neither was he present when you sat down for your meals. Even his energy was alike a hushed whisper which would remind you of his presence in the residence, but not reveal himself to you. For some reason, it had you in an unease.

No, you certainly did not miss his presence. But his absence just made the surroundings almost suffocating. There was the looming threat that something had happened or something were to happen. One worse than the other.

Silence was never uneventful.

Taking up the courage, you had once inquired Uraume about his absence. Presenting a polite bow, they answered, "Sukuna sama doesn't want to be disturbed."

Disturbed... as if he wasn't the cause of all disturbances. A natural disaster in himself. You resisted the urge to scoff and uttered a meek line of gratitude before going about your day. (Which extended with you strolling down the halls or garden or just be in your chambers and read the few books, Sukuna had bought you)

On the very same day the dark commenced. While you were mesmerized by the fall of twilight over the garden, you heard his voice.

"Don't you love playing with poison, wife?"

The sudden question made you halt your steps, you weren't even aware that he was present- shielded his aura, presumably. You turned around, raising an eyebrow with bewilderment.

"Pardon, my lord?"

Sukuna snorted , walking up to you, a smirk played on his lips. You had to make the effort of tilting your head to gaze up at him. His towering figure loomed over you, his lower left hand snaking around your waist - pulling you closer to him.

"You love poisons, don't you? Or in your words - herbs."

Your shoulders grew rigid, eyes widening with realization, a sharp breath hitting your throat. Your fingertips trembled with anticipation. You were sure to be discreet in your affairs, using the isolation he subjected you to at its best. He knew. It was bad. Very much so. And what were to happen now? What would he do to you?

Another night of horror where your screams would be unheard, your resistance proved to be futile, where you'd be left to suffer alone, where another shard of your remaining soul would be plunged by him. Another night where you'd again play into his whims... Or something more vile, leaving you physically disabled? Perhaps, even death...

The foremost was the most heinous one. You silently prayed that he wouldn't resort to that. If you were to be subjected to his torment then you wished he'd just kill you, liberating you for once and for all. Even so, survival is what the mind wants. Piecing through any tactic just to live another day. The play for now should be denial.

Sukuna's affections for you worked as a double edged sword. You aimed to take advantage of it, in every way possible. You instilled a bit of courage, standing your ground, you spoke "I don't understand what you're trying to instigate, my lord."

He looked down on you, a coy smile uplifting his lips. He threaded his fingers through the knot of your kimono, leaning down next to your ear, he inhaled your scent. His lips brushing over your neck.

"I do not believe so, wife." He murmured, his warm breath hitting your skin, a range of goosebumps rising over your arm. "In fact, I think you clearly know, what I speak about."

Before you could let a word out, he straightened up, turning around, he pushed you to walk with him. His large hand still covering your back.

"Come, let me entertain you."

.

You were walking to the gallows.

Not literally but you were sure, your end was near.

The wooden floors creaked with footfalls. Each step heavier than the previous. You hesitantly glimpsed at Sukuna, his gaze was far ahead. Not a word left his mouth in this while. Only his hold remained firm. He pushed you forward every moment your step faltered.

Your breath hitched when you turned a corner - the right wing. A rule, you could say. Sukuna made it clear since the day he -held you captive- brought you home - never step a foot in the right wing. Despair drowned your curiosity that time, you didn't question, least bothered to. Even later, you didn't dare to defy him; courtesy to the pain you were subjected to once.

Still, you could make the wild guess of what happened in there. The muffled screams kept you awake at midnight, it was easy to put the puzzle pieces together. There he revelled with the sick pleasure of tormenting your kind.

He stopped before a pair of oak doors. That's when he glanced at you, for the first time in a long while. For a moment, he stared at you with an emotion you couldn't decipher. The next moment, he pulled out the Kanzashi from your hair, letting your strands tousle down.

You flinched, pushing away the curls which clouded your vision. Sukuna held the pin in his hand, holding your gaze. He was unmoving.

What happened to him?

"My lord," You called. "What are you-"

"Stay quiet," He handed you the kanzashi back, adjusting your hand to hold it as if it were a dagger. Turning to the door, he spared you a glance. "Don't speak a word." With that, the doors opened.

Dark.

It was dark save for the light of the lantern which illuminated the room. He shoved you forward, the door locking behind as he stood aside you.

"One bite."

Huh? Bite? What did he mean? You slightly turned your head towards him but you were stopped in your tracks. It wasn't only you and Sukuna in this room, seems you had a guest. More appropriate word? A Captive.

Your eyes were wide open. On the corner of the room, sat a young boy, not more than a adolescent - blindfolded. Restrained by chains, his wrists and ankles were cuffed with metal. A small whimper left his lips as he registered the presence of both of you.

You were about to speak but then his words rang in your mind.

Don't speak a word.

Sukuna gripped your wrist, leading you to the boy, "One bite, in the arm."

He wasn't talking to you. To the boy, he kept his eyes. You marked how the boy flinched. The metals clanking on contact.

He turned to you then, motioning to the pin in your hand then the boy's arm. Realization hit you. You tried to shake your head, refuse; but one glare of his and you were compelled. Reluctantly, you turned around, trudging to the boy.

Something was wrong.

You could feel it. Why... why would he want you to stab this poor boy? A picture of misery, he was. You noted he didn't have any sign of bruises in his body - peculiar. Yet, his fragile state was enough to give you a hint that he had been here for days. Perhaps, starved too. The tension was high and all you wanted was to leave this room, in an instant.

Fine, if Sukuna wanted you to just stab the boy. You'd do it. Missing the vital points which could end his life. One, he said. You'll miss the point and done. Its not upon you that you'd pierce the wrong place. His instructions weren't specific - that'd be your excuse.

He won't die. Not from your hands.

You gently held the boy's arm, angling the pointers on the muscles. You drove it in.

Miscalculation.

The boy's body instantly stiffened, an gut wrenching scream erupted from his mouth. He thrashed around, swinging his legs and arms, his body twitching violently.

You recoiled back soon, yanking out the pin, stepping away on instinct. You watched with terror.

Foam rose up the boy's mouth, his shrieks pierced your eardrums. The fluid dripped down his jaw, marring his clothes. He clutched the area where you stabbed him. Scratching at it with all his might. The sound of flesh ripping filled your ears as the boy ruthlessly, tore the muscles.

You were stunted. You couldn't speak or move. You weren't chained but you felt as if a thousand shackles bore you down.

The next seconds were a blur. The screams started to die down, his body losing it's color. Sooner than you could grasp, did the room turn silent again.

The boy was dead.

.

"Enjoyed the show, wife?"

You slapped your hand over your mouth, stumbling a few steps back. You couldn't tear your eyes off the young boy, bile rose up your throat as the room started to spin.

"Wh-what did you-"

No- you couldn't throw up, whatever second thought it was, it refrained you from crumbling to your knees and make a mess. Shivers went down your spine, you struggled to stand straight. The stench of the corpse and the expunging liquids started to fill your nostrils. You were almost on the verge to lose consciousness.

"What... did you do?"

Your eyes flickered to Sukuna. He stood tall, not a sign of emotion on his mien. You regret ever considering mirth to the worst feature on him, cause none was more terrifying.

And he was watching you.

It reminded you of the time, you first saw him -  covered with blood of the lives he had taken, down the river bank. Victim of naivety and ignorance, you didn't know any better than to not let him see you. Wandering towards the peculiar beast, even when a gut wrenching terror asked you to run; you were stubborn. You had asked - are you alright?

"What did you do?" You repeated again.

Tilting his head, he kept his unwavering gaze fixed on you. "As a matter of fact, I didn't do anything, wife." He paused, letting the horror shadow your features, "It was all you."

You needed to run.

The kanzashi, which was till then clasped in your hand firmly, fell down. A clank, you heard.

One step.

One step towards the door. He is standing afore you, the fingers of his upper right arm ran through your open hair, tangling in the roots, he yanked your head back.

"I don't remember, giving you the permission to leave."

Tears prickled your eyes as you tried to break free. Sukuna was having none of it. He dragged you by your hair towards the corpse of the boy. Your nails jabbed into his wrist while whimpers of anguish left your mouth.

Sukuna shoved you down to your knees, tugging your hair back - you were sure, they will be ripped off if he puts any more pressure - he made you glance at its face. He crouched beside you. With a flick of his finger, he ripped the blindfold out of the boy.

"Dare to shut your eyes."

Compliance had become second nature.

The body was rigid, skin turning blue. The veins on his arms were bulged out, his mouth wide open, filled with foam, trickling down his cheek, drying on it.

The sight caused you to gag.

Horrifying. His bloodshot eyes were wide open, protruding out of the sockets. Irises dilated in shape, which you considered humanly impossible. But what had your heart hammering in your chest wasn't the vivid details you saw on the corpse. It was the fact, that you recognized the boy. Son of that distant elder cousin, you'd seen once or twice in a year.

"Look at that, love." Sukuna cooed in your ear, forcing you to face the corpse.

You shook your head violently, clawing at his wrist - desperate to escape. Your heart thumped inside your ribcage, you could hear it in your ears, your guts twisted in numerous ways as sweatbeads trailed down your forehead.

"You did that."

No. No, you didn't. You didn't do it. It wasn't you.

"You killed him."

No, you didn't... he didn't die because of you.

"Take a good look. See what you've done."

You vigorously shook your head. Denying all of his claims cause... cause they were... false, yes, false. They were false.

"No," You stated once you found your voice. "N-no, no... I- no."

Sukuna hummed, twisting a knot in your hair, "Yes, you. You did it."

No. You were innocent. You weren't to be blamed. It wasn't you.

It was... him.

"No, no, I didn't," You refused again, standing your ground. Moving your eyes towards him, you gritted your teeth. "No, I didn't do it. I didn't do anything. It was you."

"Really? How so?"

Fire burnt in your eyes. It was enough. He couldn't make you believe which you didn't commit - you didn't kill him.

"Poison," You said with conviction lacing your tone. "He was poisoned, a stab wouldn't procure such a reaction."

"Observant as ever," He mused, quirking up an eyebrow. A faint smile curled up on his lips. "Still, it doesn't gratify the fact that you were the one to end his life."

Blood boiled inside you, surging through your veins like lava. He had no right to accuse you of something. You didn't kill him, he couldn't make you believe it, whatsoever may happen.

"I may have stabbed him with the kanzashi, but that didn't have any trace of poison in it. I am-"

"Sure of it?"

You could only glare at him. He was toying with you. Tugging the strings of your conscience but you won't have any of it. "I am," You confirmed, staring at him without any falters. "I held it... you held it. If it was really drenched with toxicant as lethal as that, we- we both would be dead."

His grip loosened from your hair, hand falling down. The corners of his eyes crinkled, the smile turning into a smirk.

"It was you," You continued. "You did something to him at first and-"

Sukuna broke into a chortle of laughter. Far from jovial, more so sinister, filled with sheer malevolence. He gripped your jaw, pulling you closer to himself. His sharp canines glinted in the dim light.

"You just keep on fascinating me, wife."

Each second with him was revolting. Just his touch alone had your skin crawling. Yet, you couldn't let

"We had a pact," You stated firmly. His game was disgusting. What was he trying to do? What was his goal? "If I stay with you, you wouldn't lay a finger on my family, then- h-how could-"

"I would still stand on the ground, that I didn't do anything." He replied, a hint of amusement in his tone. "It was all you, wife. I can assure you that I didn't go back in my words." His canines glinted while he smiled. "Not a flick of pain. Save for..." He paused, his eyes widening, the carmine irises glowed in the dark. "Save for telling him, he'd be killed by a snake bite."

"There was no venom on my pin."

"Know so," He confirmed, a playful smirk on his visage. You wished you could read minds, if possible only of him, that'd been enough. Then where did poison come from? You wanted to question but he beat you to it.

"His fear turned into poison."

You blinked. Once. Twice. You knew he had an urge to play mind games but this was ridiculous. You questioned, shell-shocked, "What?"

"He let his fear get the better of him, assuming your pin to be a snake. He believed it." He explained while you listened without so much as a word. "His conscience caused his body to give out the exact reactions, he imagined. A shock, you might say. That caused his death."

His game was disgusting. If he thought, he could just give you any excuse as this and let you believe his accusations then he was mad wrong. You gritted your teeth, yanking your face away from his grip. For a second, you saw all of his eyes opening wide with surprise. But that didn't extinguish the fire burning in you.

He reached out, dragging you towards him via the arm. A glare resting on his face. "What did I tell about refusi-"

"I don't believe you," You cut him off, hands clenched into fists. It was the first time in a long time, you lost your composure in front of him. No, you wouldn't play as his doll anymore. He broke his promise, its only fair that you do so. "I don't believe a single word you say. You- you did something, you must have. Fear, belief, whatever the fuck, something as trivial as that-"

"So you think fear is trivial, wife?" He sighed, his clutch in your arm remained firm. The rough callouses of his palm, rubbed over your skin. "And here I thought, you might be different than the rest. But you managed to drop below my expectations."

"Maybe that's what I love about you, darling." He continued.

Disgust arose in you, yet again. Love. As if he had any of that. He wasn't capable of love. Not in this lifetime. Never. 

He spoke again, "Times you are the smartest I have seen, then you speak such blasphemy which would even embarrass the Gods you worship. Your silence was awarded by him leaning near your ear. He twisted a curl of your hair between his fingers. "Fear, wife..." He whispered to you. "Fear is a mind killer. It makes you believe anything. The small drop of poison which contaminates all the water."

"In the end, belief and fear are sides of the same coin," His top two eyes, flickered to the corpse of the boy. "I made him consume the poison of fear and you-" He turned to you again. "You made him believe it... so, in a way, yes. Yes, I did do something. Save for the part of ending his life. Though I didn't break my part of our pact." A smirk tugged on his lips. "You were the one who killed him. Isn't that great?"

Your breath hitched, throat gone dry. You gazed at him, eyes wide open. Your mind was a blank canvas.

Fear, poison, belief, killing...

He made you kill someone. An innocent boy who didn't even do anything.

Why won't he much rather just end your life?

Sukuna pulled away from you, standing up, he walked over to the lantern placed in the room. The stench of the rotting corpse had long ago started to pool in.

"You made me kill him." You whispered, still knelt, staring at the floor. When greeted with silence, you questioned again, a tone higher, "You made me kill him."

"And?"

His nonchalance had always been infuriating to you.

You could feel him standing a few steps behind you. "If you really wanted to kill my kin, you should've just told me. Getting your herbs was a tiring chore." You didn't miss the emphasis he put on, herbs. You could see him, rolling his eyes while speaking. "However, the taste of taking a life - isn't it delicious, wife?"

Guilt gnawed at you, tearing you internally. Your shoulders trembled as you let out ragged breaths, eyes fixed on the bloodied arm of the boy. The same arm where the kanzashi pierced, the muscles torn apart, blood drying on it due to the boy's onslaught. Nausea overrode your senses, bile rose up your throat and the next moment you were throwing up. The wastes ran down your mouth, your nails dug into the wooden - bruising your fingertips and chipping the nails. You don't realize Sukuna stepping up to your side, pulling your hair back while you were caught into the ordeal.

A disapproving grunt left his mouth after you were finished, yanking you up with your wrist. He pulled you towards the door. "Com-"

"No." Your heels remained firm on the ground. You refused him before you could even think. He turned towards you slightly, a scowl resting on his features before he pivoted around. He cast a glare upon you but before he could speak, your mouth opened again.

"You're even lower than scum." Your jaw ticked, hands clenching into fists. "You made me kill an innocent boy. Someone who might have done nothing to you, You– You disgust me, Sukuna."

Done you were with the respect, he demanded. If that angered him, made him want to rip out your heart and watch the life drain from your eyes. He was most welcome.

But it looks like, he wasn't resorting to any of that.

"You made me a murderer." You urged, staying strong in your stance. "You turned me into you."

His eyebrow twitched, a wave of mirth washed over him. "You were always like me, wife."

"I am nothing-"

"You're. You are like me. You are no saint, as you think so of yourself. " He said, leaving no room for argument. His lips pressed tight into a thin line. 

Yet, you refused to believe that. You were nothing like him. Couldn't even dream so. You were not him.

"You kill children in your womb, I kill them, after they're born. How is it so different?"

"It is different." You yelled, your jaw clenched, teeth baring out. "This world needs no more of your lineage, it needs no more of you." You jabbed your pointer finger on his chest, tears pooling into your eyes. You refused to shed them. "I kill for your own sake, I do not."

"Then who do you kill for?"

"For everyone." The faint snort of his reached your ears. You couldn't decipher what he found so delightful in this.

"Playing God, are we?" He mocked causing your vexation to rise.

"Maybe I am. For the least, I am not killing innocent people like you."

From where such defiance arose, you weren't sure of. Perhaps, all the frustration, fright, terror which accumulated till now had reached its limit. Moreover, Sukuna's provocation must be the fuel to the fire.

You might be left bleeding– No, you would be left bleeding. You welcomed it with open arms.

.

"Careful," Sukuna pushed a strand of your hair behind your ear. "All Gods aren't worshipped."

He was enjoying himself. In all honesty, your obedience was getting too monotonous. This was better. Your defiance was amusing. Arousing, if there's to add. If he knew, letting you end a few lives would have this effect then he would have resorted to this long ago.

"Better than you." You shoved his hand away, "You are nothing more than a wretched, two-faced curse destroying all of our lives."

He noted your scowl, the way your lips were shut tight, your eyebrows crinkled together. Reasons evident, all he desired was to pull you into his arms smash his lips against yours. Taste the very essence of your being. Consume you wholly, just the way you are. So that in the end, your name, your taste, your scent would be engraved in his very soul. Without your mention, he wouldn't be complete. 

But he refrained from giving in now. His desire extended to a far more sinister route. "I wonder..."

What would it be like to break your conviction? What would it be like to break you?

Oh, he knew.

Would it be right moment to let you know? Maybe he should wait for another, more appropriate time.

Hmm, perhaps he should. But no.

He let you play these games for too long. Tired of this game plan, he was. Maybe, you would just come to your senses if he let you know. So he let the words, flow out:

"I wonder, why this curse keeps protecting your pathetic life from people who would cross rivers to lay siege to your life?"

Worth everything.

Sukuna watched as your face lost its color. The previous boldness you presented him with was replaced by a mask of confusion and. Such a pretty sight, it was. To see you, falter from your stand. Second guess, yourself, be in denial then rage consumes you. And you look at him, like he was the forbearer of your misery. (He is).

Oh, how good he has you memorized.

Even the littlest of reactions you contort on your mien, on your mannerisms; everything has him intrigued. You have him intoxicated.

"You know the ones, the people... your people, for whom you play this God."

Sukuna wished he could capture this moment. He'd have the chance to take a glimpse of it again, whenever he wished to. The horrified look on your face as the weight of his words started to sink in.

Would you still look like this if he tells you the terror he bestowed on them who tried to steal you away from him? What would you say if he vividly describes each imagery of how he slowly, agonizingly burnt them, severed them and tormented them? Leaving them nothing but fragments beyond recognition.

You were his. All of you belonged to him. Without his sanction, no one could even see you, let alone touch you. Ah- just how many sorcerers perished from his hands, the number of villages, bathed in blood; save for yours. (Courtesy to that stupid pact, he forged with you)

Something had told him, that there'd be a better time to put an end to the pitiful lives of your kin.

"Can't speak? What caused so, darling?" His tone was laced with smugness, a twisted joy elicited in him. "Fearful that your play amounted to nothing?"

Your jaw ticked with anger. You were furious. "I don't believe you. You are lying."

Your trust on humans was commendable, he'd give you that. However, there's stark contrast between faith and blind belief. You were inclining towards the latter.

So, what do they do when words fail to convey message? Oh right, you give them a prime example.

"Let me just show it to you then, wife."

It was a gamble, he was willing to make. To keep you with him, forever, as he wanted - he needed you to know that no place other than his arms would be as comforting. Even if that meant breaking your very soul, so be it.

.

You were home.

One moment, Sukuna held your gaze. The next, you are standing before your hearth.

Toes dipping into the familiar black soil, the land where you ran and played during your childhood. Your familial home stood steps away from you. Still looked the same except the visible cracks on the wall, a layer of dust on top of the door and the woods looked worn out. However, what caught your eyes weren't the flaws of your home but the familiar older woman walking into your home.

"Mother…"

She stilled all of a sudden, rotating on her heels, her eyes landed on you. Shell shocked, that's what she was with the widened eyes and parted lips. A small smile curved up on your lips, she still looked the same except the few grey hairs and wrinkles aside her eyes.

"Mother," You called again, taking a step towards her. "I am back."

Sooner than you expected, her eyebrows scrunched up, mouth curving down when she finally registered your presence. You weren't some illusion or her mind playing tricks. "What are you here for?"

The disdainful tone caused you to flinch. You didn't expect this. Returning home, you dreamt of it to be filled with tears of joy and warm embraces. Not this… whatever, she was presenting you with. But- But its fine, you have returned after a two whole years. She must have been worried. The reason of her apprehension. God, you had a lot making up to do.

"Well, you know," You chuckled lightly, scratching the back of your neck. "Back… just back. I have returned."

"Found your way after two years?" She crossed her arms over her chest, staring at you with a look you didn't want to recognize.

You nodded, "Yes. How could I forget my way? Our address, its-"

You were interrupted when your name was spit out from her mouth. Her glare on you was palpable, "I know what it is. What are you here for?"

Her fury even made your skin crawl with fear. You were often on the receiving end of her glare when you were a child, given by your tendencies to run around and cause trouble for others. Yet, those glares, were none like this. This- this- you didn't want to name what it was.

"You are angry," You don't know if its directed towards your mother or yourself as you hold onto the last bit of fragments that not all is lost. "I get it, I really do." You stood on your toes, attempting to look behind her, into your house. "Where's father? Tell him, I am-"

"No more."

As if the air was knocked out of your lungs.

"What?" Your neck craned towards her so fast, it might have left a sprain. Yet, that was the least of your concern. "What do you mean by no more?"

"No more means no more." Your mother's sigh fell heavy on the air, words carried the weight of the world. Laid with pain underneath.

"How- when? Wha-what happened?" You couldn't wrap your mind around the new discovery. No one told you such. Who could've guessed? Such an ordeal to occur in your absence. And what might she be going through, without you. You didn't even get the chance to talk to him, one last time.

"A year ago," She confessed, her voice conveyed her lament and sorrow. Her words felt like a hammered blow on the fragile façade of hope, you had intricately crafted for yourself. However, she wasn't done. Her eyes held scorn, lips curled up to a sneer. "Aren't you satisfied? You finally made your mark. Must tell you," Her voice, once filled with love held nothing save for contempt, directed at you. "Good game, you played, dear." She spit the endearment as if, it were poison.

"No, I- I never wanted any of this. What are you even talking about?" A trembling footfall towards her, you whispered, "M-mother-"

"Don't you dare call me that."

The weight of her judgement felt heavy on you, pressing down, suffocating you alike chains.

"You are no daughter of mine."

You weren't aware since when the tears had sprang up your eyes, breaking the barricades, they shed down. Your throat burnt as you struggled to even breathe, clutching your chest - a searing pain shooting in your heart. Your heart was shattering from the ultimate rejection from your own flesh and blood.

"While you're at it, know this." Your mother continued.

The next words were like a blow to the gut, each syllable lined with the weight of revelations. Ones that hung in the air like a funeral shroud.

"In his last moments, his only regret was bringing a daughter like you in this world."

.

This night just doesn't seem to end, does it?

You were left as a hollow shell. Tethering the steps away from the home you were no more welcomed. Exhaustion reigned heavy on you. Physically and mentally.

Where were you going? You didn't know. Just where your feet would take you, there would you go. Perhaps, you can return to Sukuna. Would he take you back? Most probably not. Considering, your earlier outburst, adding to the fact that you refused to give him what you want; he might just discard you as you proved to be useless.

Funny. It was so damn funny. Once, you wished to escape from his hands whatsoever the price yet now… now you considered returning to him.

You could hear him calling you pathetic. Disgusting. More disgusting, that you agreed with him.

You were truly pathetic.

But before you could spiral down the void of self-hatred, a voice- nah, multiple voices startled you.

"There she is, parading around some meek, innocent girl." A scoff is added. "You are far from it."

"The nerve of you to just walk back into our lives after you betrayed us."

Your neck cranes to your left, an old man - the village elder with a few other men and women following behind; they approached you. "Excuse me?"

"Who do you think you are?" A woman's cry reached your ears. "Returning after you turned your back on us."

You flinched at the accusation thrown. What could be possibly be instigating? To all your knowledge, you were walking in this- in your village after two long years. Anger, disdain and accusatory glares clouded their features. If your mother's insults weren't enough to pierce through your heart then it certainly did now, with all the people, you once called your own to look at you like you were the monster.

You summoned the least bit of courage you had, squared your shoulders and started, "I'd have you know-"

"Traitors don't get to speak." At the center of the crowd was the village elder. He was the pillars of your hamlet, revered for his wisdom and guidance, but now he looked akin a judge ready to deliver his sentence upon you. A sentence which would push you more into this conundrum. "You've been cavorting to that monster. Disgusting."

"I am no traitor." You retorted soon. "You can't accuse me of such when you don't ev-"

"Save it for someone who would care, whore."

The curse had your mouth parted in disbelief, horror etched upon your mien. Sooner than you could compose yourself, did whispers of agreement rippled through the crowd which branded you as a traitor.

"You are just as twisted as him."

"Get out of here if you so much as hold your life dear."

"Don't play as the innocent bitch, now."

The accusation hung in the air like a dark cloud, poisoning the atmosphere with its venomous hatred. Your breath was caught in your throat as you searched desperately for words to defend yourself; the crowd's hostility rendered you speechless. But amidst the cacophony of condemnation, one voice stood out above the rest.

I wonder, why this curse keeps protecting your pathetic life from people who would cross rivers to lay down yours?

Really? Were you really recalling his words now? Now of all times… You truly were pathetic.

For one moment, You just stayed silent - letting their accusations bore you down. Somewhere you wished all of it were just a nightmare. You'll soon wake up on your bed beside Sukun- fuck! Since when did you start to expect to wake up with him? He- He was toying with your mind. This was the only result. But the fact that this was your thought process had you recoil back.

The next moment, everything made sense.

These accusations were stemmed from the fact that you- you were proclaimed to be the wife of the King of curses. Your unwillingness to return, given for the pact you forged with Sukuna, was taken as your cue that you betrayed your family, your home, your people.

Your family despised you. Your people despised you. The very same people you chose to protect were turning their back on you.

Did they truly try to lay down your life?

Amidst your plight, you didn't register when the village elder marched up to you. "Didn't you hea-" His trial at speech was cut off. Nay, his lifeline was cut off. (Humorous, isn't it?)

Numerous red lines appeared on his body before it burst off into a globs of flesh and blood. Blood which splashed onto you, marring your visage and attire with its hues.

He was here. You knew it. You could feel it.

For some reason, it filled you with a sense of relief.

However, your people were on the other end of the rope. The eyes which afore held hatred and disgust, they were now filled with horror and fright. In this reverie as the villagers started to flee, a torch tumbled on the ground - lighting the grass on fire. The winds showed no mercy, as the howls increased, so did the flames.

Provoking him was never the right move.

You were digging your own grave.

So you shouldn't have been surprised that your wish would be granted. Yet, if you could have one wish then you'd wish for freedom but no- freedom was a forfeited dream, far beyond your reach. Consideration of that one would never be fruitful. You are trapped even in your dreams.

Playing with fire only gets you burnt.

For long, you played this game and this- this was your compensation. For everything you had done until now, all you are returned with was abandonment. Not that supposedly, betrayal, yes. More appropriate.

Flames surrounded you, crawling up your skin, the screams piercing your ears, your chest heaved up and down. Gaze, once settled on your hearth, now all you saw were the burning huts, the crackling of embers reached your ears. Attire and hands stained with blood of the insolent.

No one touches what's mine.

The warning shouldn't have been taken lightly. Should have known, the extent of his power.

Eyes held terror, fright, regret- whatever you could name. The multitude of names you received seemed no more than a distant dream, nowhere to be found. All were running away - expectable.

You expected calamity, but you were calm.

The sparks danced over your irises as everything went down in the crimson hues. Save for you, you weren't burning. Not an spark touched your skin. Was it the distance or the control? Who knows. But one confirmation which you held was that - tonight you won't die. Not so soon either.

Careful, not all Gods are worshipped.

The words rang in your ears and as if on cue, you found him again. In this trance of insanity, only one thing held your sight when you attempted to turn - The eyes tinted with crimson.

All of a sudden, something burnt inside you too.

Unbridled rage consumed you. Your chest heaved up and down as ragged breath left your mouth. Their words came back to you, ringing in your ears as if you were pushed into a void.

Who do you think you are? Returning after you turned your back on us.

Would this bitch even be alive if you prioritized yourself?

Don't play as the innocent bitch, now.

Is that the thanks you get for trying to protect them?

Traitors don't get to talk.

Traitor… fine, you'd be the traitor.

With caution you took one step towards him. No reaction. Your chance - you took another. Then another and another. You stood before him, with nothing save for a void etching your features. Amusement flickered over him, the corner of his lip curled up.

"Saw it for yourself wife?"

Seemed like silence was your go-to response lately. From your peripheral, you saw the burning houses, the distant screams reached you. For some reason, the screams were almost soothing. You revelled in this. Their gut wrenching shrieks were like a balm to your essence.

Their predicament was your solace.

Sounded like someone you knew. Someone who had warned you about them but you chose to remain ignorant. Sickening… were you becoming like him?

You were always like me, wife.

You could laugh. Maybe you were like him.

"Let's forge another pact?" You offered, keeping your eyes pinned on him.

"A pact?"

"A pact."

A smirk curved up his lips, the upper pair of arms crossed over his chest, "Humour me, love."

The smirk wasn't directly for you. But he did. So you returned it too. An equal one with an equal malicious intent. Cause in that moment, no second thoughts, no doubts clouded your mind. And so, you uttered the blasphemy:

"You kill them all, each and everyone. In return, I will stay with you, give you an heir. Whatever you want from me."

.

A year later

Screams died down after a gruelling ten hours.

"Good news, Sukuna sama. It's a boy."

A/N: Honestly, I was almost done with this fic, long ago but while writing the climax, I kept thickening out with all the self-doubts but then I just wrote what I wanted. I do understand if the ending is not up to your liking and I sincerely apologize for it.

However, thanks for reading up till the end. I enjoyed writing this a lot. Some feedback is appreciated <3

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[forbidden-sunlight]

False Garden of Eden [yandere!various!csm x stoic!reader]

Credit goes to @hana-no-seiiki for inspiring and collaborating with me to write this piece that is based off their current CSM series Chainsaw and Happiness Pillbox [link to story is here!] and @lyomeii for proofreading/editing, especially with that one I was stuck on lol :)

The intention of this story is for entertainment purposes only, it is not my personal belief(s). The behavior exhibited here is inappropriate and unhealthy, hence it should not be encouraged.  There are also triggers, so please take caution. You are responsible for your Internet consumption!

Content and Trigger Warnings: Obsessive Behavior, Strong Language, Gaslighting, Stalking, Toxic Relationships, Toxic Behavior.

Humanity disgusted you.

For all their philosophical talk on the importance of imperfections and cherishing all life around them, their greed knew no bounds. Even when they had a roof over their heads or a warm meal in their bellies or hadn’t had their lives cut short by disaster, they wanted more. More, more, more. You knew it was only a matter of time before their mistakes became their undoing….but why did your husband love these pitiful creatures like an owner fawning over their precious dog? It baffled you. But to her credit, Makima was quite good at that; a great manipulator who lured others into Public Safety when they were at their lowest, and those who defied her commands would be on their knees, begging for mercy. Just like what she had done to you all of those years ago.

The chains she had coiled around your body was a contract of fidelity; a marriage, a vow to love and protect each until ‘death do us part’. In her terms, ‘love’ meant being an obedient wife who should kiss or embrace their weary husband after a troublesome day at work, and vice versa. Obviously, Makima referred to herself as the husband. It was her right as the ancient, powerful Control Devil to protect the pitiful Dreaming Devil. This unfortunate person was you, of course.

Sighing, you hoisted yourself up from the ground with gloved hands on your knees, using one to wipe the sweat on your brow before glancing around the valley. This area had been protected for the last century from being demolished and turned into a condominium because it was within the jurisdiction of a shrine outside Tokyo. And for the last century, it has served as a secret place for you to escape the city and remove yourself from the mask of a devil hunter in the Intelligence sector.

To bask in the solitude of nature for a few glorious hours before returning to the home that you shared with Makima. The priest did not mind if you planted seeds for a small garden, so long as you did not do anything to anger the gods’ resting place. A small price to pay for a ‘contract’ that allowed you to have freedom. In the time you have found this place, the small garden became a chaotic, lush area. And you would not have it any other way…except perhaps not two crows that you knew were under Makima’s control.

It was her way of respecting your privacy with a little….surveillance. You repaid such kindness by flipping up your middle finger and blowing a raspberry.

Yet despite the feeling of tranquility that flows over your stressed body, to be able to inhale the air in your lungs and just breath from the leash she had around your collar you knew deep down that this is not true freedom. Aware and you wanted more than just a garden to be free. You wanted to leave Tokyo and never come back. To go to some hidden corner of the world where no one, not even Makima, would even dream to think you would go.

You frowned. Wonderful. Now you felt like a hypocrite because of your excessive greed for freedom. Because without this garden, you knew you would have gone insane much sooner than your current mindset, being slowly and meticulously chipped away by Makima’s machinations until her focus reverted to Denji.

The boy who was a shell to the Chainsaw Devil. Her idol, the Hero of Hell. He was everything to Makima….but to you, he was dangerous. As the Dreaming Devil, you were both a strong and weak devil. You thrived on the fear from the poor souls who were trapped in the illusion of their worst nightmares - a tactic that your husband has used on more than one occasion in an interrogation with a stubborn suspect - and yet with dreams themselves, pure and impure, they made you weak. Since Denji’s mindscape was full of these dreams, he was less than an ideal partner to be around when devil hunting. Especially since Makima had every intention of using you as an incentive for the kid and ensuring his absolute obedience towards Public Safety.

So why didn’t it bother you as much as you thought it should? Did it have something to do with the Chainsaw Devil himself? Or were you just being stupid?

More importantly, why the fuck did Makima have to bring him home, of all the dogs she could have possibly selected? She knows how dangerous the Chainsaw Devil is. If the ‘dog’ had been another Hayakawa Aki, then there wouldn’t have been too many issues.

Well-known asshole and a competent Public Safety official, at least Aki knew when to stand down, or at the very least be much more aware of the situation than Denji was.

You still did not understand why his face always turned red when he was within your vicinity. Humans had weaker immune systems than devils, so he could just be sickly from making too many contracts than the average hunter.

Still doesn’t explain why you would run into him even though you never tell anyone where you’d be in the city. Even Denji would just so happen to be nearby when he ran up to greet you like an enthusiastic mutt.

Shaking your head, you resumed your work in the garden. Once weeding had been finished and some of the bushes trimmed, the skies began to transmute into a dark blueish color, overriding the reddish-orange hues of the remaining daylight. Ah. You have been here too long. It was time to go. Back to the cage that was a ‘home’ to Makima and her dogs.

Fumbling around in your pants pocket, your deft fingers removed a glass vial filled with sand. Pulling up the cork, you shook out the sand and murmured under your breath, allowing it to engulf your body in a vortex and teleport you approximately half a block from the condominium.

It wasn’t hard to see why the Dreaming Devil was also known as the Sandman to the humans who feared them so.

Wiping off some of the dirt on your shoulders and pants, the Dreaming Devil who craved freedom was gone, and in its place was a stoic human who worked under the Public Safety’s Intelligence sector, [First Name] [Last Name].

When she got off of the elevator on the third floor, Makima smiled. Ah, her wife was finally home from gardening and had dinner almost ready. She hadn’t intended to stay at the office until late, but Denji needed an extra incentive. Or would it be considered a punishment to fondle his superior’s chest when it was obvious that he’s lusting after her spouse?

She blinked for a moment, then shook her head. Well, either way, he was motivated to kill the Gun Devil. Promising a puppy that he’d get anything he wanted in exchange for destroying an enemy was effective. She briskly walked down the carpeted hall and towards a door with 307 etched in golden lettering. With a quick turn of the key, she stepped into the hallway and was immediately bombarded by her precious pups.

Makima gave a short laugh, her grin widening as she gave each of them a good scratch behind the ears. “Yes, Custard, Papa is home. Were you good for Mother today? I hope you were too, Tiramisu, or no special treat for you tonight. The same goes for you, Strawberry! Don’t think Mother did not tell me about how you tried to chew up the television remote again! You know that isn’t a toy.”

Once all of her precious children were given affection, she walked into the kitchen and saw her sweet spouse standing in the kitchen cleaning the dirty dishes. Makima glanced over at the dining room table and saw that everything had just been plated. Miso soup, grilled fish with rice, and boiled veggies. A typical Japanese staple, minus the wine glasses filled with a visceral red she was all too familiar with.

Although devils did not need human food to sustain their appetite, Makima truly appreciated the time and effort her wife had put into planning the meals they shared. Especially acquiring blood without tipping off any of the other tenants. Yet what caught her attention was [First Name]’s shoulders. She was shivering. Did she forget to put on a sweater after taking a shower?

Goodness, she was a forgetful one, wasn’t she?

But that’s all right. This is why the Dreaming Devil had a reliable husband to look after her well-being.

“Is everything all right?” Makima asked as she approached [First Name] from behind, wrapping her hands around her spouse and resting her chin on the devil’s shoulders. “It isn’t very cold in the apartment? Did you spend too much time outside again?”

[First Name] did not answer. Instead she kept scrubbing dishes in the sink with a soapy sponge, hot water spewing from the faucet. Yellow orbs widened slightly as realization hit Makima.

Ah. Is she afraid that something bad happened at work earlier today and she’d be punished for it? Silly, silly spouse.

“If you’re waiting on something, don’t worry.” Makima felt [First Name]’s body quiver even more when she tightened her grip on her spouse’s middle. “I love you very much, [First Name], and would never allow anything or anyone to hurt you. No one will ever lay a finger on you but me.”

Denji...and Aki....they might look at her wife but they will never lay a hand on her. Although she has been a good girl and never interacted with anyone except for the cashiers at the grocery store they will never stop covering what they desire the person who is hers by divine right.

Taglist

@hana-no-seiiki

@lyomeii

#csm x reader #yandere various #csm makima #csm denji #csm aki #csm x y/n #csm x fem reader #x reader #chainsaw man #forbidden-sunlight #yandere x men #yandere manga #tw gaslighting #tw toxic relationship #tw obsessive behavior #tw toxic behavior #tw stalking #cw gaslighting #cw toxic relationship #cw stalking #cw obsessive behavior #ns.fw

[riminiscensce]

HEY STEPHEN ִ ࣪𖤐 venti

SYNOPSIS … “I’m waiting alone now, so come on and come out and pull me near, and shine, shine, shine. hey stephen, I could give you fifty reasons why I should be the one you choose. all those other girls, well they’re beautiful, but would they write a song for you?”

NOTES … this is such a failed attempt at old school romance idk, intended to make this a bit angsty but I felt like “nah”, made this a bit short too

CONTENTS … fluff/sfw , gender neutral reader

Word Count … 1028

Genshin Impact (Taylor’s Version) Masterlist

Venti stays true to himself whenever looking over his people. He knows how to see the best in everybody, though he also knows that there are rare occasions when he sees wrong.

He has had his fair share of misjudgments, had misconceived others— usually when something seems far too good. Though in some cases, it doesn’t bother him much.

When he mistakes something for being beautiful, that is when it would usually hurt.

Sometimes it leads to betrayals, tears, and reflecting on his trust towards others.

He knows things can be deceiving, but the thought of you felt so genuine to him.

So real and unpretending.

Venti knows he saw something within you. A light that never dared to hide behind even a single patch of darkness.

It was beautiful.

And when he had the chance to talk to you, the bard of Mondstadt, known to never run out of words and tales to muse, found himself failing to say half the things he wanted to say.

It got Venti’s notice that he wasn’t the only one within the city who'd seen your genuinity.

He saw how others would talk to you, help you, and just be with you.

Venti knows he can offer a new feeling if it were him that was beside you.

He’s the bard! Much more— the God of Freedom (not that you know)!

He can take you to new heights than anyone can.

Beating around the bush isn’t usually Venti’s style, so he already accepted he had some sort of infatuation towards you. Sweet, innocent you.

Something untouched by Teyvat’s story.

Someone that he feels is untouchable.

Not even by him.

But he’d be lying if he said he doesn’t want to get caught up by you.

As months passed, he continued to ponder about your existence.

“Venti?”

The way you say his name perfectly matches the way he strums his lyre. It was a wonderful tune.

Turning towards you, the wind shifts as Venti notices his surroundings grow dimmer.

Leaving only a ray of light that shined down on you only.

“Hey there, what brings you all the way out here?” He watches as you gracefully sit down on the patch of grass beside him, careful as to not disturb much of the surrounding. He notices how you do that so well.

“To watch crystalflies.”

“Really?” That’s all? Archons, may your innocence be like this forever and always.

“Mhm, I’ve only heard stories on how they light up every path they fly through. I wanted to see for myself.”

“You seem very dedicated, so far as to leave the city in the middle of the night… Do you really want to see them that bad?” Venti muses, the idea of it feels so natural to him.

“I guess you could say that,” You hummed, “I just never seen anything shine the way that crystalflies do in tales. Except for the sun, but you can’t even look at it without ruining your eyes.”

Venti chuckles at your white thoughts. He simply adores your sense of wonder even at your age. Not a lot of adults grow up with maintaining their pure thoughts.

He only hopes, to any being listening to his pleas, that you remain unchanged.

Because he knows he would also stay the same for you.

Right now, he wants to help you remain the same. That was when you felt the breeze shifting against you, pairing with the seemingly mindless tunes of Venti’s string instrument.

Within the same moment, you see small specks of teal light floating through the dark.

“Crystalflies only drift towards those that holds cleanhanded and honest emotions.”

Venti watches in comforting silence as the crystalflies shine, shining alongside you.

Despite the quantity of the creatures, they don’t seem to outshine you.

You still stand out as ever.

“You shine brighter than ever.” The bard hums, retreating his gaze down his lyre the moment you turned yours towards him, thinking he was mentioning the crystalflies.

“They do.”

“I meant you.”

“…”

“I’m not quite sure how you do it, but that light you have seems far too good and different from anything I’ve seen.”

At that peaceful moment, the bard who lost his capability of expressing words about you, starts musing his feelings toward his audience, you.

So he goes on..

“I see everyone in the city as similar souls, yet you seperate yourself from theirs, as if you were meant to be your own wonder.”

And on…

“I’ve seen it all. Different kinds of people, how they act, how they shine separately… but somehow even beings such as crystalflies seem to be bothered by how you outshine them.”

And on…

“You seem to act as if you were unpretending, but as I get to see you stand out on your own, the more I came to realize how none of it was an act. But rather, it was sincerity that was touchable for no one.”

And on…

“People change, they always do and I’ve already grown to accept that phenomenon. Though when it comes to you, I can only hope you stay the same.”

Until he realized how much he had said aloud.

But it seemed as if it wasn’t enough.

You stared agape at him, the presence of the flying glows fades into your inattention.

“A simple “I like you”, would have sufficed.”

That was when Venti grinned and chortled.

“I can’t help myself knowing how much you hear that phrase from a lot of people…”

The wind picks up yet again.

“I simply don’t think those three words are enough for me.”

And with it, the tranquil sounds of nature and Venti’s instrument harmonize together.

“I want my words to stand out the same way you do to me.” He continues, “No matter how many beautiful souls tell you that they like you…”

He winks, “Would have they said it the way I did? Hehe…”

You giggle at his behavior, not so different from his usual self, although there was some indifference with the way he expressed himself tonight.

And you know deep down, that no one would have expressed it the same way Venti did.

rimi's notes …

I intended to make this a “happy crush” kind of situation where Venti thinks that he shouldn’t mingle with you because he’s a God and you’re not, so he just settles to watch you shine from afar to lessen the hurt he knows will come with change. Anyways, Happy Valentines’ Day!!!

I would also like to deeply thank you for your guys’ support :3 I’m glad people are liking the silly things I write heheh 🫶

Next in line would be Wriothesley for Speak Now!

hearts / reblogs / follows are very much appreciated ★

Stay Beautiful by Kaedehara Kazuha (previously) ִ ࣪𖤐 I Can See You by Wriothesley (coming soon)

#genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #venti x reader #venti x reader fluff #genshin fluff #genshin impact tv 🫶🪽