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env0writes · 3 months

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Janus Estuaries Vol. 3, 1.1924 “Another Off The List: Another On"

The hard part about having too much to do Is writing down a list The hardest part about writing down a list Is that it is one more thing to do On the newly formed list Of things to do Now there is one more thing to do DONE There is one less thing to do now On the long list of many things to do They are good things Careful, loving things Groceries, Dishes, Laundry, Sleep Taxes, Writing, Eating, Sleep Finding rest at end of day Finding words, to her, to say Getting out with strangers dare Knowing that the world doesn’t play fair There is so much left yet to do I wonder what comes next I wonder if you wonder too

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env0 · 7 months

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Spilled Inktober, 10.9.23 “Repetitive Bookworming"

How wise these gentle shepherds of souls must be To gnaw such scholars to the core Greater than any Alexandria, if we could usurp the almighty What knowledge to use to wage this holy war Oh, messengers of the departed, dearly pass on Knowledge and spirits as well Look into the light, so that the cycle moves onward, time is gone As our the books, empty bindings on the shelf, like hell Again, the words are missing, where did they go? Father, mother, gone to the flame Knowledge pursuit in desperate flow Consume each line, lettered, fettered with blame Another book, another tome, another hallway wings will roam Flitter, flit, and flick each page Such records read, soon consumed, and laid in loam Oh, the flame should fill all with rage Red and bright, oh, burning light Where gentle souls seek out to chase Pass on, you weary readers, into the night Sleep, oh, dream, of distant lands and lives to soon embrace

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env0writes · 8 days

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NaPoWriMo Vol. 3, 4.15.24 “Stamps“

Let me pay the postman Who sends my s.w.a.k. away Let me pay with penance With pennants and reminders Remainders of my taxes Waxing moons and bent and broken spoons Let me pay the postman Who sends my parcel to partners With letters laced with love Doodles and daliance And not delays But in many many ways Let me pay the postman Who sends my love’s my love With scribbles and scrabbles Points both high and low With leaves and petals And victorious medals Please postman let me pay

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env0writes · 21 days

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Idle Steps 3.30.24 “Shadowbox Theatre"

Though only rubble remains Life once thrived here Seen only in the setting sun’s shadow Corridors once filled with love harbor only fear A place loses itself without people Strong memories seep through to floorboards Staining the very memory of the construct Burdened with beams and knowledge, such records A person loses themselves without places Ground into and grounded to their memory A person needs a place to be– A child needs a place to flee Though only in the dying day May we ever truly see the world this way

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env0writes · 22 days

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Idle Steps 3.28.24

“Welsh Storms"

Like giant sky whales The clouds gallumphed overhead Sirens blaring Sky pitching hue The streets of London ran dark My street glew green Radioactive and bioluminescent Seas of grass projected to the sky-whale-clouds And down came their bombardment Their spittle, their misting, their petulant Precipitation Foreign waters stolen on high Is it sadness or delight to be doused? For now I am clean– Given magical sight to see this siren’d fiction Will you give me a welcome home? Or like these whales must I too Seek refuge in a place not mine own When the sun parts these red-sea's clouds And the whales float onward away Let me evaporate Perhaps that remnant will be pure

@env0writes C.Buck

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env0writes · 29 days

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Idle Steps 3.23.24 “Dreams of a Love that I Know"

I’ve been dreaming of a lover Made of bits of ones before How they all fit nice together When puzzle-placed upon the floor Bit by bit they lock in place Like a thought-made frankenstein Though the heart is ever pounding Oh, how I’d love to make her mine Oh, moon – oh, stars Sweet heavens above That tooth of mine is gnawing, teething, craving For that damning contemptible thing called love I've been thinking of the good times All the moments held so dear Is that pain that oft accompanies That downfall – do I fear? Should I be ripped to ribbons Tie me tightly ‘round your heart ‘Fore you say, “I love you so” Though truth be told, I can’t recall being told that part Thereupon my morning rise Greater is the wakeful pain Losing dreams As lovers lost to time, in youth – the same I have been longing, nay, been yearning Whilst learning to love myself, just as As I approach mid-third-decade The facade of youth, like morning fog fades whereas The me I made in middle school Remains there cut, as the rug Arms outstretched in cruciform So lover, me, do hug

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env0writes · 2 months

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Idle Steps 3.11.24 "Don't Get Dour"

It can’t always rain If the conditions aren’t right So know that this pain Won’t persist pass this night What is there to gain When you wallow in grief Overruling the self, so the feelings sustain Against the tally-marked years, this moment is brief You’ve done this before and you will do it again Cold are the shoulders with burning hot passion These sorrows are anything other than plain No other soul, though, will make this admission The clouds can’t always blot out the sun’s flickering mane Nor the night can darken, forever, the sky Though it may feel as though, all that is must remain The world's better off, as a world where you try It can’t always be sunny and bonny and blue As the inverse, thus proven, as always – is true

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env0writes · 2 months

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Idle Steps 3.8.24 "Horrid, Florid, Ordeal of Being Loved"

My heart opens, full bloom I could gather a thousand petals at the very sight of you Pomegranates are a bloody, challenging mess So maybe I’m worth loving too Whether I am fresh picked Fallen or bruised There is bitter sweetness worth working for No adoration refused So peel back each ventricle Each pump and each beat Take me to prairies, to valleys, to parks For a picnic, take seat Rosebuds and earbuds and you’re bud; I am Budding and blooming and blossoming bright Take all your time with me I’ll not leave this night Make of me a labor, a passionate task Is this too much to ask of you? Too arduous a task? Then on the dank and dirty ground I shall rot to feed the earth anew

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env0writes · 20 days

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NaPoWriMo Vol. 3, 4.2.24 “Will I Remember This Time“

There were not enough moments Captured in sand-grain, steel-handed Red-light-digital-clocked moments To which I told you (all) I loved you Those moments, seconds, minutes, hours, days Passed At last, these days I never told you (all) I loved you Will I recall If you Recall To say to you (all) I love you Although you’re far and plenty few I try to say, to show, I love you

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env0writes · 1 month

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Idle Steps 3.21.24 “Sunday Was For Feasting"

White bone wood balm Paler than the droughted palms Dreaded, unfed’ed Weary weak appraisal Arrival on most high Elated, delayed and held up Caravans halt No passage, no river crossing No life crossing, no passover White bone-wood palm Sun bleached, white washed Bulldozed over on sleepless nights What driftwood will wash ashore? From undrinkable water To unlivable land Is this the promise? As written, as planned?

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env0writes · 4 months

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Deciding Embers Vol.4, 12.15.23 “Mutual Fund"

Loving you as one might to the bank I have given you a precious many things And when the going gets Shall I withdraw affections When all interest ceases to compound As I am allowed You have been a place a safety, No longer– Shall I entrust my futures, my homes Beneath my much lovéd mattress Whereupon some other teller sings Great offers of interest pinched Grown inch by inch With the long years To keep all things of this world And many a few not of it Within your embrace

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env0writes · 1 month

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Idle Steps 3.15.24 “Isn't It Grand?”

Expectations fall short of count To what amount(s) Little less for much more Spring-leaf hopes Looking for green Mean-eyed frantic Trans-oceanic Waiting for the pot to boil The silt to turn to soil Water turn to oil And everything To add up

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env0writes · 2 months

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A Feud to Carry Vol. 2, 2.16.24 “Mourning Star"

My wings, two rotting petals To crumpled colors autumn felled Whipped up to slow descent and falls Too fragile to fly, to love, to be held Summer’s flight of fancy succumbed Dillied and dallied Thrummed and hummed Crashing in beautiful fiery possibilities; seed Will the hot air rise And with me too, be carried Or will I fall on failing, flailing wing from lies Believed in – oh, father, brother, spirit now long buried Before you wake in winter, give spring and summer chance For only autumn, shall be my one true romance

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env0writes · 2 months

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A Feud to Carry Vol. 2, 2.12.24 “Lessons of the Third Degree”

Youth, unfettered by worries Full of gusto and unearned confidence To the field of battle you go To the field, you’ll fall, of woe Yes, you are trained Pained as I am to admit You will struggle and fall No matter my shouts or my call Should you return from this chore This foolhardy errand of proof What lesson is to be learned Not from teachers that you’ve spurned Broken crown and name as black as your eyes As your belt, bearing the brunt of each welt Do you wish to be a star? Grasping at aspirations near and far? The folly of youth, follow thy father The world is yours to venture into Let me pack your lunch and wrap your hands So that I may trust you’ll overcome when things stray from plans

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env0writes · 3 months

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A Feud to Carry Vol. 2, 2.9.24 "Sweet Teenage Tunes”

I sliced my heart upon a mandolin In your suburban townhome kitchenette When you tugged on its strings like a marionette What phantoms lay lurking should you deign to win? A twisted feeling, as winding as our suburban roads Gnarled and filled with dead ends make you sick Warm as the blood that you spilled in swift limerick Passing me by in the nights, in liminal limerence, fate goads Chorus chords that cut like blades of ice Swiftly played as mandolin, oh, mandolin tunes Parting leaves from trees from limbs from hands from you soon, is– The evenings alone with thoughts of you will have to suffice How can I move, beating my chest, without a heart Loosing blood like arrows, directionless Surfeit to say, now, affectionless Hollow songs in valentine holes restart That boy lays buried in your yard, beneath the giant oak Littered across loved fields and gardens well and less tended As childhood, youth, and love has ended Within my age, with knowledge may I soak Scarlett flowers look over your cooking still Potted and planted with fondness, reflecting – your window sill

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env0writes · 3 months

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A Feud to Carry Vol. 2, 2.7.24

“Saint Peter's Post”

I rise before the waking morning sun With blearied eyes and work yet to be done No sound, save silence breaks this silvered night A sleeping world before first golden light Await the day at gates to judge entry Less pearl on paint to pass as these gentry To work! To work! On towers we build high How burdensome with soaking boots and lye No warmth of love from sun that’s overcast How long in this am I supposed to last? When nature keeps is budding bloom asleep No frost, but chill is all winter may keep I am the eyes that guide them on their way Beyond the gates, where profits surely lay

@env0writes C.Buck

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