#I nearly forgot to include his ring before I posted this what is wrong with me m

[blended-ice]

I love pork cutlet bowls.

#peas n guac #fun little doodles of his fun little fit #obsessed with his outfit #I drew his Eros costume entirely from memory so THATS WHY THE HALF SKIRT IS ON THE WRONG SIDE #¯\ (ツ) /¯ #yuri on ice #yoi #katsuki yuuri #I nearly forgot to include his ring before I posted this what is wrong with me m #unforgivable 😤 #id in alt text #fanart

[samuel-de-champagne-problems]

It's Delicate: Part II

Summary: Spencer Reid finds himself at a gas station at 2:00 am, thinking he’s only leaving with a cup of crappy coffee. But something taped to the door catches his eye. Spencer leaves the gas station with more than he intended: the chance at a friend, and maybe something more along the way.

Word Count: 3.6 k

Author’s Note: Here's the second part in It's Delicate, my first chapter fic. I've planned out kind of where I see this eventually going! Thank you to anyone who reads, likes, comments, and reblogs. It really means the world to me.

Content Warnings: Expletive language (3 uses), mentions of drug use, sexual innuendo

READ PART I

It's Delicate Masterlist

It's Delicate

Sitting on the plane, Spencer looks out from the little window. For hours, there’s been nothing but corn fields and clouds. It’s eerily peaceful, being there high above the clouds. His whole life Spencer has felt this distance between him and everyone else, but nothing makes that feeling more prominent than being strapped in a glorified metal box 35,000 feet off the Earth’s surface. But the thing is, Spencer does need to be flying above the trees to feel lonely. He can do that with two feet on the ground.

Luke sits across Spencer, the table between them and a deck of playing cards are spread out across its surface. He has to nudge Spencer’s leg from under the table, trying to bring him back to reality as he stares out the window.

“Whatcha thinking,” Luke asks, Spencer has been noticing more and more that Luke is one of the few people that actually listens to him.

Spencer, whose mind is racing too fast to even formulate an articulate thought, attempts to dodge Luke’s question with a noncommittal shrug.

“Reid, these cases are hard for all of us, you gotta know that man,” Luke says, laying down a four of a kind.

Spencer narrows his eyes, shocked that it hasn’t clicked yet for the rest of the team. He cracks his neck, preparing to answer Luke.

“We almost locked up an innocent man, Alvez. I almost sent another man to the same fate as myself. What kind of fucked up message is that?” Spencer says, throwing down the cards on the table. He doesn’t wait for Luke to respond.

“I fold,”

Spencer walks off into the small kitchenette to make a cup of coffee. He doesn’t want to think about his increased reliance on coffee, because he knows it’s a hot cup of coffee or a cold needle of Dilaudid in his veins. Spencer checks his watch, it’s 10:17 pm, maybe too late to find a meeting at a church or rec center somewhere.

He sneaks a peak at his phone, which was still unfortunately on Airplane Mode, he hasn’t even gotten a chance to see if Y/N has responded. He doesn’t know much about her, just as much as she knows about him.

It’s a brave new world for Spencer and he’s knee deep into the unknown.

Spencer can feel Luke’s eyes on him. He just knows that the minute he gets home, a certain tech expert will be ringing him. He knows that it’s Luke’s way of caring, but for someone who’s been alone for so long, having people that actually care is almost drowning.

Walking back to his seat, Spencer hands Luke a coffee. He smiles slightly; it’s the awkward smile that he used to make when intimating police chiefs and idiot cops would look him up and down like he’s a TA. It’s a peace offering for Luke, who despite his tough looking exterior, is one of the kindest people Spencer knows.

“Look, Reid. I’m sorry that we didn’t put it together. It’s just that man that we caught, he’s not like you. He’s not innocent of crimes, he’s just innocent of this crime,” Luke says in an attempt to make Spencer feel a little bit better.

“The thing is Luke, I’m exactly like that man,”

Spencer returns to staring out the window. The cards and the coffee on the table are long ignored for the silence that is found when you’re high above the clouds.

--

Spencer hears Tara and Emily murmur quietly about going out for a round of drinks. Luke accepts, while JJ and Matt decline, eager to get home to their families. Emily looks over at Spencer, her eyes silently scanning him, his body language. Spencer knows that there’s nothing he can hide from Emily, so there’s no use in trying to pretend he’s alright when she can take one look at him and know that nothing is right.

“You guys have fun, I’m going to head home and get some sleep. I plan on visiting my mom tomorrow and mornings are usually better for her,” Spencer says, slinging his go bag around his shoulders and making the trek back to the security to check out.

He walks slowly, enjoying the sound of the crickets chirping as he trudges along. Spencer tries not to think about the man, Richard, who was almost locked up for a crime that he didn’t commit. Spencer is pretty sure that being the person to throw an innocent man in jail is worse than being the innocent man in jail.

Spencer’s phone buzzes loudly, disturbing the silence of his walk. He looks at the phone to see a couple of messages from Y/N. Spencer slides open the lock to his phone and hits the button to read her messages.

Y/N: Spencer...that has a nice ring to it. So tell me a little bit about yourself. Your big three, but as books. Go! 🌞🌙⬆️

Furrowing his brow, Spencer reads the message over again. He does not have a clue what “big three” means, but it seems like some sort of pop culture thing that he’s not skilled in. He wants to text Garcia for a translation, but he’s also not too keen on telling her how he came across Y/N’s number.

Y/N: I assume you’re working, but I'm kind of impatient so I’ll give you mine 🙃 I’m a Little Women sun, an Emma moon, and an In Cold Blood rising.

Y/N: Oh no….I hope my astrology didn’t turn you off

Y/N: Not that I was trying to turn you on

Y/N: omg Y/N please shut the fuck up

Astrology? Spencer isn’t one to judge, but he’s a scientist first and foremost. The idea that there is something written about him in the stars seems like ludicrous. He decided to ignore the other messages, particularly the ones with a little more than slight innuendo.

Spencer: Y/N- I’m sorry I just got out of work. As for my big three, I’m not sure about astrology. I don’t particularly believe in pseudoscience. But those are good choices. In Cold Blood is an excellent choice. Capote spent years researching the case. In fact his prose and technique inspired the entire “Nonfiction novel” genre. The world of journalism and true crime would not be where it is without Capote’s work.

Y/N: Oh my god. You are a total nerd. 🙀

That stops Spencer right in his tracks. He’s only a couple of yards away from the Volvo at this point, but somehow it feels a million miles away. You are a total nerd. The words replay in his mind as the small gray bubbles pop up again. Spencer can feel his heart constrict at Y/N’s words. It’s ridiculous, he’s nearly 34 and is getting upset that a stranger called him a nerd. Spencer unlocks his car and tosses his go bag, phone included onto the passenger seat.

After a couple of minutes his phone buzzes again. He’s half tempted to answer it, but the way his heart seems to beat faster tells him to ignore it.

Y/N: I fucking love it and I think you’ll love this too

Spencer’s entire demeanor changes as he reads the message. He’s always had difficulties reading emotion in writing, especially when he can’t analyze the handwriting. Sometimes, it’s even harder to judge inflection during conversations. Maybe that is why Spencer has spent all this time studying people, studying the way that their minds work. Before he can get too lost in his thoughts, another message pops up.

Y/N: Meet Capote and Second Cat

Y/N: They are the loves of my life

Spencer: They are very...distinguished looking. Capote is an excellent name choice then. Second Cat is also quite catchy.

Spencer hesitates before sending the message, he notices that Y/N uses what Garcia calls “emojis” quite frequently. He assumes that it’s some sort of “texting lingo” that expresses emotion in small graphics. Great, he thinks. He already has a difficult time deciphering Y/N’s cryptic wording and now he’s got to analyze these emojis.

Maybe he should profile her. He re-reads the message and settles on a “😄” because he figures that he can’t go wrong with offering Y/N a smile.

Spencer: I don’t have a cat, but when I was a kid I always wanted one, they’re quite good companions for those that live several different kinds of lifestyles. From active to sedentary, they are adaptable and independent. Honestly they are the perfect pet.

Y/N: Is this your way of telling you’re a crazy cat man? 😜 🙀

Spencer, still sitting in his car that’s parked in the parking lot, chuckles at Y/N’s response to his message. Maybe it’s just easier to ignore his rambling when it’s done through 1s and 0s and there isn’t a face to the words.

Spencer: I’m actually more of a fish guy

Y/N: Like a “I-like-to-go-fishing-and-post-picture-of-myself-kissing-my-catch-on-Tinder” kind of fish guy or...I can’t think of any other kind of fish men

Spencer, not totally understanding the obvious joke that Y/N is trying to make, settles on something that he hasn’t really ever tried: being himself.

Spencer: Not quite sure what a Tinder is, but I think fishing is terrifying and kissing a fish is something out of nightmares. But his name is Leo

Y/N: DiCaprio?

Spencer: Uhh, Tolstoy

Y/N: Good😉 ⚔️🕊️ 🇷🇺

Spencer glances at his clock on the control panel, it tells him that he’s been messaging with Y/N back and forth for nearly 22 minutes. He nearly forgot how tired he was.

Spencer: Y/N- I’m so sorry but, I just got to my car to drive home from work. I’ll text you tomorrow morning about the book club, maybe we can figure out some things.

Y/N: OMG Spencer!! you should have told me. I’ve been talking ur ear off. sleep well and yes please tomorrow we can talk about the book club

Y/N: Good night, Book Buddy 😴

Spencer wants to respond to Y/N, but he doesn’t know what to say. She seems to text so easily, and judging by that, she must be around Spencer’s age or a little bit younger. Besides JJ and Penelope, Spencer has never had a friend close to his age. It’s a strange new territory for him and he’s walking in head first into No Man’s Land.

He starts his Volvo, the check engine still lights but, reminding him once again to go get it fixed. Driving away from the parking lot, Spencer hands over his ID to Gina, the security guard. She checks his ID and gives him a tired smile. Spencer, as he drives home to his apartment, thinking about what books he and Y/N will read together. He wonders what kind of books are her favorite, if they have any authors that they can obsess over together, or if what she thinks a poet’s prose is.

The summer air rushing in through the window is nowhere as warm and as comforting as thought of Spencer finally having a friend that isn’t able to read the scars of his past in the text bubbles that pop up on her screen.

--

When Spencer opens his eyes for the first time that morning, he isn’t sure where he is. Sometimes, before he can stop his thoughts from travelling there, Spencer thinks he’s still in jail. He hates the feeling of terror that rushes over him but he hates the idea of being vulnerable a little bit more. But the softness of his pillows and the coolness of his cotton sheets remind him that he’s not sleeping on a hard cot with only a layer of fabric over his body. The light streams in through the half closed blinds, and Spencer judges by how brightly the sun shines in, it must be around 9:45 am.

He supposes that he prefers the way the sun’s rays paint horizontal bars across his face more than the vertical bars that cast gray shadows over his cell at Milburn Penitentiary.

It’s a day off from work, so Spencer didn’t set an alarm, instead allowing his mind and his body to catch up on some much needed rest. The nightmares have been getting better, but his dreams are still haunted by the way that he hardly recognizes himself anymore. Deciding that it will be a day spent in pajamas, Spencer goes to his bookshelf in his bedroom to pick out a couple of novels to read while he drinks his morning coffee and defrosts some of Luke’s strawberry pastries.

Before heading out of his room, Spencer stops himself in the doorway. He replays the events of last night. He declined to go out with the rest of the team, while he walked to his car he thought about the crickets telling the temperature, and he read over Y/N’s messages.

Y/N.

He promised he’d text her back in the morning about their book club. Last night, she didn’t seem to mind Spencer’s long messages and awkward phrasing. He still doesn’t really know how this Book Buddy thing would work, but since he found Y/N’s number on the flyer, he can only assume that she knows what to do. He leaps on his bed, landing with thud on his belly, to grab his phone that charges on his nightstand.

Spencer settles at his kitchen table, a cup of steaming hot Dark Roast coffee in a Captain Spock mug in one hand and, surprisingly, his phone in the other. He scrolls through the messages from last night, Y/N’s cat and emojis tempt a smile to Spencer’s face.

Not entirely sure how to start the conversation again, Spencer looks around for inspiration until his eyes land on a certain fish tank in the corner of his apartment. He snaps a quick picture of Leo and attaches it to the message.

Spencer: Good Morning from Leo & Spencer

Spencer sets down his phone after a moment when he realizes that Y/N is probably not going to answer him back in a couple of seconds. He takes out a strawberry pastry from his freezer and puts it into the toaster oven on a non-stick baking sheet. His thumbs run across the texture of the book he started on the plane ride after his and Luke’s ill fated poker game. It's a thin book of collected essays on the meaning of life. Camus, to Spencer, is a little pessimistic with his droning on about the meaninglessness of life. Though Spence has seen the absolute worst that humanity has to offer, he still has to believe that there’s a deeper meaning behind it all.

His toaster oven rings, altering him so that his toasted strawberry pastry is cooked. He plates his breakfast and pours himself another cup of coffee- he’ll need it to get through Camus’s section on Absurdism this early in the morning. But the flash of Spencer’s phone screen sends him reaching for his phone. Y/N replied to his message.

Y/N: hi leo!!!

Y/N: and you too Spencer :) Did you get a good night’s sleep. You got back late it seems.

Spencer, taking a bite of the strawberry pastry, ignores the burning sensation in his mouth. He types out a response to Y/N as he washes down the bite with a swing of coffee.

Spencer: I did, thank you. Can you tell me a little bit more about this book buddy thing. From what I gathered from the flyer it’s like a little book club of our own and we meet at the bookstore?

It doesn’t take long for Y/N to respond. The little gray dots pop up almost immediately after Spencer’s message is delivered.

Y/N: That’s about right! Is it okay if I call you? Kinda easier to talk that way 🤷‍♀️

Spencer reads over the message a couple of times. He doesn’t really like to talk on the phone and only does it out of necessity. He’s pretty sure that his voice is grating and his vocal fry is quite irritating. Yet, he finds himself replying “yes” to Y/N. Soon enough, his phone buzzes in his hand and Spencer has to remind himself how to pick up a call.

“Spencer? Um, this is Spencer Reid, right?” the voice says. It’s a woman’s voice and he can only assume that it’s Y/N, considering it is her phone number calling him.

“Y/N, uh hi. This is Dr. Spencer- I mean this is Spencer,” he says, nearly forgetting that Y/N doesn’t know him as Dr. Reid, but as just Spencer. It’s been a long time since someone has known him as Spencer.

“Oh great! It’s wonderful to finally have a voice to your name. So about these buddy reads. You seem to have a good grasp of what they are,” Y/N’s voice trails off a little bit at the end and Spencer finds it natural to fill in the silence.

“Yes, the flyer was quite informative. But I was wondering, do we read the same books or do we read different books?” Spencer asks, trying to restrain himself from scaring Y/N off. But something about her made him think that she didn’t scare easily.

Y/N chuckles lightly in the speaker of her phone, “that’s a good question, uh, I was actually going to ask you what you would rather. We can read the same books, or if it’s okay with you we can choose what the other would read for that week,”

“Oh really?” Spencer says, very much aware how his voice rises a couple of octaves. He can’t trust himself to hold back on rambling over the phone Y/N, so he resorts to using his strained, brittle voice that’s full of hesitation and restraint.

“That’s the plan, so whatcha thinking, Spencer,” Y/N says playfully, like she can sense that phone conversations maybe not make him feel at ease. There’s something so natural and silvery about her voice; it reminds Spencer of an audiobook reader. While he’s not too keen on audiobooks, he’s sure that he’d listen to anything she reads or has to say.

“Um, I think it sounds interesting to pick out books for each other. I tend to gravitate towards more technical books or even books that aren’t in English so, uh, I think it would be interesting to get out of my comfort zone,” Spencer says, cringing internally at using the word “interesting” twice in a couple of sentences.

“Well, as long as you don’t pick out something in physics or anything by Ayn Rand then I’d say we’re good,” Y/N says. Spencer thinks it’s a joke, but he’s not too sure how to respond.

“Will you still be my Book Buddy if I read 1 out of 2 of those?” Spencer asks, hoping she’d get that he is trying to continue the joke.

“Oh no Spencer please don’t tell me you’re an Ayn Rand fanboy,” she says, and by the airy way she laughs, Spencer ventures to guess his joke landed successfully.

“So,” Spencer starts, he never has made plans with people outside of his team, and on top of that, there’s something about Y/N’s quickness that makes him a little nervous to meet her.

“I’m talking your ear off, aren’t I? Please Spencer, if you’re going to be my Book Buddy, you’re going to have to get used to me talking a lot, especially you pick out good books, which, I already have a feeling you’re going to be favorite Book Buddy,”

For once in his life, Spencer doesn’t really know how to respond. He lets out something in between a strangled laughter and a noncommittal chuckle.

“So,” Y/N says, mirroring Spencer’s earlier words, “so are you free tonight, I can meet you at the bookstore..”

Y/N’s voice trails off and Spencer leaps to finish her sentences. It doesn’t feel like his interjecting or interrupting, but like he’s snapping a puzzle piece together.

“Does 7 work?” “7 is great, Spencer. It’s a date,”

Those three little words send Spencer’s eyes flying wide open. He scrambles to come up with answer to louden the silence that falls, but he swears he can hear a string of quiet curses before Y/N manages to squeak out a small “goodbye,”

Y/N’s last words play back in Spencer’s ears. He scolds himself for being so weird and awkward that the very idea of going on a date with him would send Y/N in a tizzy. It’s not a date, because Spencer can’t think about it being a date. It’s not a date because of the looming photo above his mantle that freezes his future in the past. It’s not a date because of the nightmare of vertical bars that haunt his dreams

It’s not a date. It’s so not a date because Spencer would call Luke to come over to help him if it was.

“Hey Luke,” Spencer says, trying to control the nervous waves in his voice, “no man, I’m fine, it’s uh, easier if you just come over. I’m fine, really,”

Y/N: I really hope you're not an Ayn Rand fanboy 😉

It’s so not a date.

--THANK YOU FOR READING--

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More Amazing People I Want to Share This With :)

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#spencer reid x reader #spencer reid #spencer reid fanfic #criminal minds spencer reid #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid fic #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid comfort #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x fem reader #criminal minds #criminal minds x reader #criminal minds fanfic #criminal minds fanfiction #reid fanfiction

[thebluesunflower44]

Hello please tell me literally everything about leaves on the vine thank you good day

hi! thank you for the ask! you're going to regret saying 'literally everything' as soon as you click Keep Reading (: but first, a snippet

Toph😎 added Azula ⚡

[Sokka] Toph why

[Toph] Oops pressed the wrong button

[Suki] ...your phone is controlled entirely by your voice

[Katara] NOT AZULA!! She tried to kill all of us at some point!

[Aang] She nearly did kill me 😢

[Azula] Well, I DIDN'T, did I?

I should've tried harder.

[Zuko] AZULA

[Azula] Fine, that's not what I meant to say.

Honestly, I don't remember that. I was probably fucked up.

I was crazy back then heh huh hehehe

WIP ask game

I have a VERY MESSY, general outline for this, but it could change at any time. mostly just going where the gaang takes me!

the story is set 7 years post-war. yes, this is done so that toph can say "what up I'm toph, 19, and I never fuckin learned how to read." that's the only reason.

Sokka, Teo, and the Mechanist have invented phones, electricity, the Internet, search engines, and social media apps in those seven years. (if you like keeping your brain intact, you should definitely not think about the logicality of this story.) Iroh often helped generate electricity until the factories could sustain themselves and Toph was the one to create gadgets suitable for people who are blind.

on the seventh anniversary of the war's end, they unveil the phones to the public. the devices are available to everyone and there's no social inequity because this is my fic and what I say goes

they have Tumblr, but Toph insisted that they name it Rumblr. there is also Kohbook (haha get it like Facebook) that is used exclusively by the White Lotus, Kanna, Aunt Wu, and, for some reason, Bosco. cue ALL the facebook memes. we have them typing in capslock randomly, using all the wrong emojis at the worst time, shit-talking Pakku publicly because they forgot how to open HawkMessenger, praising their children/grandchildren/students to the skies and then ending with a really embarrassing anecdote...it's a fun time

idk a good name for the ATLA Twitter app (if you guys have ideas, help) BUT do you guys know that one account that pretended to be other people? I think the handle was jaboukie? they pretended to be other people by changing their username and profile picture, and then tweeted embarrassing things?? hopefully that rings a bell,, anyway - toph is going to do that. she likes the chaos.

uhh okay as for the actual plot, we start with an oblivious zuko and deep in denial katara. we also have suki and sokka who have to be separated for now, and there's a lot they're realizing they don't know about each other, so they have a bumpy road ahead. and then there's aang and toph who aren't even thinking of each other that way, but they will. they will

zuko is actually dating mai at the start of the story. that goes as well as can be expected from a zk story. as their relationship deteriorates, suki and toph are busy pulling katara out of denial, which culminates in the last snippet from this link

aang and toph development fhjkdsahf i still have to figure this out. never written them before so this will be a challenge

suki and sokka talk about how war has affected them. maybe they decide to take a break? look i really cannot write angst-less stories

iroh decides, after a few months of seeing zuko be mopey and face 107 assassination attempts, that he needs a wife. he arranges a whole partner selection thing without zuko's knowledge, and zuko, for all his Fire Lordy powers, doesn't know how to get out of this or refuse his uncle anything

katara is not included in the pool of possible wives, because everyone knows putting her name in a hat like that would piss her off. interestingly enough, she's pissed off anyway! it's anyone's guess why...

development shown through vine references yay

the whole shebang where zuko realizes he's looking for katara in every woman and confesses to katara

some more dramatic lines and growth blah blah blah

ofc, we also have sukka and taang developing in the meantime. sukka has probably gotten back together, and taang's nearing the point of getting together

insert melodramatic, tearjerking zk reunion here

kiss and be happy. maybe another assassination attempt if i'm in the mood for it

the end. maybe? probably

if you read all of this, I'm sorry. my brain is jumbled. here's another teaser :D

[Zuko] KATARA I NEED YOUR HELP

[Katara] On my way. What did you do now

[Z] Hey! I didn't do anything

I need help picking a wife. These ladies are terrifying

---chat switch---

[Katara] I hate Zuko. I'm going to bash him so hard the next time I see him

[Suki] 👀👀

[Toph] 😏😏😏😏😏

[Katara] That's not even an innuendo what is wrong with you two

[Suki] 😏😏😏😏

[Toph] 👀👀👀

[Katara] 🤬🤬🤬

#i think this is almost everything i have for this fic #putting my disorganized thoughts out into the world once again :// #but i'm glad you guys seem to be enjoying the snippets thus far!! #leaves on the vine #zutara #sukka #taang #blue's writing #ask game! #mutuals <3 #ifyouwereamelodymeg

[artificialqueens]

Vegas Rules (Jela) - Lita

Summary: It's Christmas Eve in Las Vegas, and Dela just got married by accident. Bitch Fight spin-off.

A/N: So, this was meant to be for the Christmas fic challenge, but I'm bad at rules and forgot to include the word prompts, so just take this as some very, very late festive backstory/fluff. I've got another one in the works that I will post once I've finished it (so, probably in about March) but for now enjoy this - for clarity purposes, it's set about ten years prior to the main story and therefore prior to the existence of Femme Fatale. <3<3

____

It’s a little after eleven. Dela has her bare feet resting on the dashboard of the rented SUV, her hands clasped around a half-finished gingerbread latte. That  cut on Jinkx’s forehead has already bled through the band-aid - she’s sitting behind the wheel, still in her ring gear, which is covered in blood and stinks of sweat. They both knew that they were wasting precious time hanging around here. They both needed to shower and sleep as a matter of urgent priority, before their flight back to Seattle at the asscrack of dawn. But the lights are sparkling, and neither of them feel quite ready to leave the parking lot. The enormity of what just happened is still setting in.

“So…” Jinkx says - looking at Dela like she wants her to finish the sentence for her, still unsure of what to say. Dela looks at her blankly. Both of them have been unusually quiet. “Married, huh?”

“Married,” Dela replies flatly, her eyes wide as she stares blankly out of the window, taking a sip of her coffee. Starbucks at nearly midnight felt wrong, but she had more or less resolved that she didn’t plan to sleep much, if at all. Her mind felt too busy.

“Look, I swear to god the promoter told me it was going to be a work. I think maybe they were just-“ Jinkx says frantically. Her cheeks are flushed pink; a nervous, agitated energy to her.

“It’s okay,” Dela smiles softly. She places a hand on Jinkx’s thigh; the redhead takes it with a tight-lipped smile. “It’s not your fault.”

Jinkx grimaces, not meeting her gaze.

The angle had been fantastically stupid, and neither of them had been completely sold on it in the first place. Jinkx had been booked for months into a feud with a heel who was fixated on Dela in a fantastically creepy, stalker kind of way - outdated and overplayed as hell. It felt like something pulled straight out of the eighties; Hulk Hogan and Miss Elizabeth, only tackier, and in front of less people. Not the first storyline Dela had worked where she’d effectively been property, but this one was definitely the most egregious. The booker realised that the venue they’d booked for the upcoming Christmas Eve show had a wedding chapel attached, the culmination of the story had been planned out: a ‘Vegas Rules’ hardcore match, wagering Dela’s hand in marriage in the main event.

It felt icky, as Dela was brought out to the ring by two referees, in a costume-shop wedding gown and veil, and stood redundantly at the side of the ring for the entire bout. She may as well have been a sexy lamp for all the involvement she’d had. The plan she’d pitched to intervene at the last gasp and be the one to inflict the final blow on Jinkx’s opponent had been shot down in a hurry, god forbid she get any agency in her own kayfabe fate.

She’d hated watching the match. She always did, whenever Jinkx got herself tied up in ridiculous weapons-based spotfests like this. Plus the guy she’d been opposite - she couldn’t remember his name, despite the fact that the feud had lasted months, and she’d been a hair’s breadth from marrying him an hour ago - was an astonishingly sloppy worker. No technical ability, just brute force and a devout lack of consideration for his or his opponent’s mutual safety. She’d watched most of the matches between the two of them through her fingers. She’d rather shit in her hands and clap than climb into the ring with him herself, and somehow that lack of willingness was extended tenfold when it came to Jinkx. She didn’t trust him as far as she could throw him.

This match had been more of a disaster zone than usual. It had only taken about two minutes for him to bust her open hard-way, with a sloppy takedown that had smacked her head against the edge of a broken table. And predictably, the audience hadn’t given one iota of a shit about the match or the outcome, already filing out of the area after a dismal undercard to hit the casino at the other end of the venue. Still - Jinkx, very much the natural babyface, had been the one to go over, with or without Dela’s help.

It had apparently been quite sweet, from an audience perspective, as an Elvis impersonator conducted the ceremony in the centre of the ring, the heel’s still-breathing carcass still sprawled out at the feet. They hadn’t clicked on that they’d just gotten hitched for real until they got backstage. Somebody hadn’t communicated something somewhere, and now there they were. Why neither of them had questioned being asked to sign shit was a mystery to Dela, who still wasn’t sure whether or not the whole thing was just an elaborate rib.

The five am flight home had seemed like a better idea before everything had transpired; usually Jinkx was good at crashing out anywhere after a show was over, and Dela only really had to stay conscious long enough to get them through the airport and onto the plane. But right now there was so much nervous energy in that goddamn car that getting home for Christmas felt like a lifetime away. Not that either of them took Christmas particularly seriously; Jinkx’s family celebrations had only really extended to a ten-minute phone call and a card in the mail in recent years, and Dela had never celebrated it, period. Missing it wouldn’t be the end of the world. But it was the done thing, and more to the point it was a designated day off where the world shut down for five minutes and she could guarantee actually seeing her dad for any amount of time. She felt bad about how much time he spent alone since she’d moved away.

They should probably start thinking about heading to the hotel, to grab their shit and check out if nothing else. There was no point in going to bed - they’d have to be up again by the time they got to sleep. Dela felt uneasy. The sun had set, and she was sitting in a parked car behind a low-rent casino, in a cheap satin wedding dress, and Jinkx had been fantastically unsettled all night. And she didn’t like it - usually they were better at talking their shit through.

“Are you okay?” Dela breaks the silence. "That cut looks bad - we can go to the ER if you think it needs stitches, I don't mind if we-"

“No, it's fine. I'll be fine.” Jinkx folds her arms, her lips pursed. “I’m just sick of this shit.”

“What do you mean?” Dela asks tentatively.

“All of this.” She puts her head in her hands against the steering wheel. “This company sucks ass, tonight was awful, I feel like an idiot, I’m tired, and I don’t wanna do it any more.”

“Do what?”

“At this point - wrestle. At least not here. I can’t take much more pretending to be something that I’m not.”

They’d been working with the same promotion for a good few months, which seemed perpetually stuck a few decades behind the rest of the world - they’d found themselves fending off an abundance of stupid nonsense in their time there, including but not limited to a proposed heel-turn for Jinkx that would see her moonlighting as Buffalo Bill. The higher-ups had been really hot on Dela’s appeal as a valet, which meant that she hadn’t seen in-ring action in months, and that was starting to drive her demented. Coupled with the fact that, in seven months of being out as trans to more-or-less everyone else in their lives, Jinkx hadn’t felt safe enough to breathe a word of it to anyone in the locker room. She didn’t trust almost any of the other guys to take it well, and trusted the behind-the-scenes team to have her back, or frankly to prevent them from killing her, even less. She’d even had to hold off on telling Bill - who she’d known since they were both teenage rookies, and had been virtually attached at the hip to for years - because he couldn’t be trusted not to run his mouth if put under pressure by the other guys.

It wasn’t like it was something she’d kept particularly close to her chest. Jinkx had always been a little flamboyant, even by wrestling standards; being a long-haired, androgynous cruiserweight who spent more time on her makeup pre-match than any of the cis women they’d ever worked with, and walked to the ring to ‘Dude Looks Like a Lady’ had raised a fair few eyebrows both past and present. But she could for the most part wave that away as working the gimmick. Not like she could do that now - ever since she’d first told Dela, it was like she’d unleashed something that now couldn’t be put back in the box where she’d been keeping it for years, and the more she had to try and keep it under wraps, the more of a toll it took on her. It was a fairly shitty state of affairs; she’d been changing in the bathroom for months now, guarding what had essentially been an open secret for years with her life now that it existed outside of the ring. It was only natural that by now, her nerves would be more than a little bit fried.

“Baby, it’s Christmas. I-“

Jinkx gives a weak laugh. “And? You’re fucking Jewish.”

“I’ll have you know, my dad and I take Chinese takeout very seriously.” Dela smiles. “What I was trying to say is that as of today, the world is effectively on pause for a week.  We can go home, and forget about all of this for a little while. It’s gonna be okay.” Dela rests her head against Jinkx’s shoulder.

“That doesn’t fix anything - it just means dealing with it later, that’s not the same thing.” Jinkx murmurs. “God, this is all so fucking stupid!” She smacks a fist against the steering wheel - Dela jumps back, startled.

“Look, I know this promotion is a garbage mess. We can start trying to find somewhere else to work in the new year - our rent is paid, we don’t need to worry about any of this for a while. Screw it, quit tomorrow if that’s what you think is best. This isn’t fair on you. You’re being booked like shit, they have less than no faith in my abilities - there’s gotta be somewhere out there with more than two women on their roster for god’s sake. This stopped being worth it a while ago.” Dela says.

“I know all of that, but that doesn’t make it any easier. God - tonight sucks. I hate this.” Dela takes a long, wavering breath - trying not to read too much into what Jinkx has just said.

“I really don’t want to, but I have to address the elephant in the room here. If you’re upset about us getting shoot-married by accident, we can get a divorce if that’s what you want - or annulment, whatever. It doesn’t matter.” Dela says. She’s trying to keep her tone even, but she can’t quite escape the nagging feeling that that’s what this is about - it really does matter, and the way Jinkx is acting is starting to freak her out. Dela can’t remember the last time she got this cagey over a bad storyline, and this was the one variable which had never happened before.

She’d been thinking about it for god knows how long. Years, really - they’d been dating for about five, and she’d spent four and a half of those daydreaming about their eventual wedding day. Sure, it had always looked a little different in her mind to what had happened. She just knew that all she wanted was Jinkx. But if Jinkx doesn’t want this - doesn’t want her…she shudders, blinking the thought away before it can get any darker. She feels tears sting at her eyes.

“It’s not that I don’t wanna be married to you.” Jinkx blurts, her voice shaky. “This stupid fucking promotion ruins everything, and it’s pissing me off, and I just- for fuck’s sake.” She reaches around into the back seat, grabbing her gear bag and pulling it into her lap. Dela looks at her confused as she rifles around in the chaos of her stuff like a woman possessed, a little taken aback. “Here.” She presses something small and hard into the palm of Dela’s hand. Dela barely blinks; still trying to push away the stirring doubt in her mind.

“What?” Dela says, her voice barely audible.

“Don’t play dumb.”

She looks down. There’s a black velvet ring box in her hand. Her eyes brim with tears again. These ones sting a little less. She’s suddenly lost the ability to move, or speak - her mouth opening and closing wordlessly like a goldfish, her fingers clasped tight around the box.

“Jinkxy, I-“ she stammers, unable to get words out in any coherent order.

“I was gonna ask you tomorrow. I was gonna do this right - not at a show, not in front of an audience. I just wanted this to be ours. We were gonna do this for real, and it was gonna be beautiful. Not whatever tonight was. And now everything’s gone to shit, because I chose a fucking stupid career, and dragged you along for the ride with me-“ she stops, realising that Dela is still staring at the box in her hand, slack-jawed and dumbstruck. She gives a small, stifled laugh. “Come on - I spent forever picking that thing out, are you gonna open it already?”

Dela’s hands are shaking as she takes her first look at the ring. It’s simple - a slim silver band with a single, round diamond in the centre. Understated; pretty. So completely unlike everything about their lives - and everything that had transpired that night for that matter - and yet so entirely perfect. The tears finally spill over.

“Jinkx, I…” She’s still having a hard time stringing a sentence together, wiping her eyes with the heel of hand. “It’s beautiful - I don’t know what to say.”

“Uhh...yes?” Jinkx looks incredulous, a smile rising to her lips.

“To what? You haven’t asked me anything.” Dela laughs, still in a state of complete, beautiful shock.

“I mean like - come on.” She gestures at the ring. “Figure it out.”

“Jinkxy, I don’t give a shit that our wedding was technically two hours ago. if you’re asking me to marry you, you need to actually ask me to marry you.”

“I mean what’s the point if we’re already-“ Jinkx stops herself, succumbing to a fit of nervous giggles, before taking a deep breath. “Fine - will you fucking marry me?”

There’s snow falling - just barely, tiny white flakes catching the lights on the buildings around them and landing on the windshield. Jinkx takes Dela’s hand - pulling the plastic diamond off of her ring finger and throwing it out of the car window.

“Yes.” Dela smiles, blinking away more happy tears as she puts her coffee cup on the dashboard and pulls Jinkx into a tight embrace. Jinkx wrestles the box out of her hand, slipping the ring onto her finger. Their lips meet, Jinkx cupping Dela’s cheek with a hand as she pulls her close. “Yes, I will fucking marry you.”

#rpdr fanfiction #jela #bendelacreme #jinkx monsoon #lesbian au #trans character #fluff #holiday fic #fic challenge #christmas #glow au #wrestling au #bitch fight #femme fatale wrestling au #lita

[hogwartsfirebolt]

Hello there! I’m finally here with the third and last part of my favorite drarry fics I read in 2019!!! In the first part and in the second part I recommended 10 stories that made my year, and in this post I’m recommending 10 more that I absolutely adore. The banner art is by @spielzeugkaiser who was really kind and let me use this GORGEOUS piece, which you can (and totally should) reblog right here. Now, without further ado, here’s my,

FAVORITE FICS I READ IN 2019 PART THREE

1. The Company of The Rose - @lower-east-side - 31k - E - Six years after the war, Draco Malfoy has been restoring magical estates, while sidestepping his mother’s plots to marry him off and resolutely avoiding his issues. An advert in the Prophet takes him to a remote island, where a mysterious stranger has purchased an abandoned retreat. But the house has a few secrets of its own, and Draco will be forced to deal with not only his past, but the possibilities of the future.

We’re starting out this list with one of the last fics I read last year, and undoubtedly one of my absolute favorites. It’s gorgeous, sweet, breathtaking, a dozen other adjectives I can’t even think of. Stories that take place in beautiful, secluded places have a special place in my heart, and with a sure hand the author leads us through some of my favorite aspects of the trope: slow forming friendships, the feeling like they’re living in a world of their own as they get to know each other for who they really are, wonderful, delicious sexual tension keeping me breathless until the moment it snaps. The sex pollen element is also worked in a way I had never read before, with an exploration of what happens in the aftermath, addressing the issue of consent it creates. It’s just absolutely phenomenal, every single word of this. 

2. I could be wrong, I could be ready - @harryromper - 57k - M - At first Harry wonders if they’ve managed to destroy his vaults and are trying to tell him in the most oblique way possible. But when he turns the page he realises they’ve found a vault. A vault in the name of Lily and James Potter.The parchment trembles a little in Harry’s hand. He takes another gulp of wine. Harry Potter left Britain after the war and didn’t look back. Ten years later, when Gringotts discovers a vault containing his parents’ belongings—including their badly spell-damaged wedding rings—he’s forced to face up to friends and family who’ve grown in ways he could never imagine, a wizarding London rebuilt beyond his expectations, and the anniversary of the Battle of Hogwarts. And if that wasn’t enough, there’s the entirely unforeseen problem of Draco Malfoy. Featuring pureblood wizarding traditions, ancestral magic, open mic nights, marriage equality, a diner in Brooklyn, and the return of Fleamont Potter.

Explorations of Harry as a character and his post-war issues never fail to hook me right in, and this beautiful fic takes us with him on a journey where he changes so, so much, and at first he does it by running away, thinking everything will remain unchanged as long as he doesn’t acknowledge it, which, of course, isn’t the case. We see him having to face his past, reconnecting with his friends, finding and coming to terms with pieces of himself that he forgot about, or never knew existed in the first place, and it’s absolutely exquisite. The tremendous amount of character development, the regaining of trust in himself and others, the way we can witness a love story blooming slow and steady, and see Harry grow into a confident, wonderful man. God, I have feels for this one, for every detail, every character and setting and emotion. It’s absolutely fantastic. 

3. What Real Thing? - @l0vegl0wsinthedark - 12k - E - They don’t cuddle, they don’t talk about their relationship (or lack thereof) and they certainly never fall asleep in each other’s arms.

This was my year of falling in love with l0ve’s fics. I had read some of her work before, but it was a few months ago that I found myself deep into her ao3 page, nearly weeping with the amount of emotion every single one of her stories stirs up within me. Picking just one was extremely difficult, but I finally chose this one, because the way she paints the relationship between Harry and Draco is masterful, their dynamic shifting and changing little by little, baby steps that become full-on sprints, single-minded and hesitant all at once, until we see them elbows deep into a feeling they don’t even know they’re experiencing, and it’s just brilliant, scorching hot, all-encompassing in a way that made me feel caught up in the whirlwind that is their relationship. If you haven’t yet read anything by l0ve, then I strongly, strongly recommend you start right about NOW. You won’t regret it. 

4. Teeth - @amelior8or - 5k - E - Potter’s been practically begging for it, for months, constantly staring until the air crackles with the intensity of it. Draco always stares back, until all it takes is a brush, a spark, before they go up like flash paper. The crash into each other is inevitable. Draco’s heart has got teeth. And there is nothing he won’t do to keep up the fight with Harry fucking Potter.

I am absolutely, 1000% weak for werewolf stories, and in just 5k words this one managed to enchant and entrance me. It’s hot and fast-paced and intense in the way I love, with their relationship charged with emotion and intensity that transform bickering into passion in the blink of an eye. The moment I reached the end, I went back to the top of the page and reread it that very second, because I had to experience it all over again. Amazing characterization, banter to die for and explosive chemistry are all present in this gem. I kid you not, I’ve read it about six times at this point and just keep going back to that moment in the showers because THAT DIALOGUE IS JUST- wow. 

5. Hush, darling - @magpiefngrl - 23k - E - Draco is in trouble. To get out of it he needs to seduce Harry Potter.

My god what a story this is. Absolutely unique, 23k words that felt like so, so much more because of everything they made me feel. There isn’t a single line of dialogue in this story that doesn’t feel purposeful, the characterizations constructed with such skill that every step the characters take rings true to their essence and gives us another clue to add to the puzzle that is Harry Potter, vulnerable man, powerful man, and Draco Malfoy, in all his darkness and his light. It also features some of the best sex scenes I have read, EVER. I could go on and on about this one, so let me just refer you to my long, individual rec for some more flailing. 

6. The Pirate and the Prince - @nerdherderette - 49k - E - Draco can't believe that fate and circumstance have made him a stowaway on the Master of Death's ship. He doesn't know what's worse: the dread pirate's legendary vendetta against the aristocracy, or the fact that his captor is the most infuriating yet irrefutably fascinating man Draco has ever met.

YES!!!!! YES!!! The moment I saw the cover art for this fic on tumblr my entire being just screamed YES, and it was everything I could’ve hoped for and more. Listen, there is nothing I love more than fics where I get to see Harry as a powerful, ruggedly handsome man who’s not afraid of getting his hands dirty, and in here there’s some of that and MORE, because he’s a freaking PIRATE. And not only did I adore that aspect of it, but the writing pulled me right in, the setting so vibrant I could feel it in my bones, and I just genuinely enjoyed every second of reading this so, so much. There’s ships and adventure and fighting for what’s right, there’s lovely kisses, heated kisses, secret identities and parrot Hedwig. Just, all in all, a great freaking time. 

7. Falling for a Golden Boy - @rockmarina - 44k - E - Merlin. Why couldn’t Draco have moved to a forgotten village in the Alps? He could have turned into a shepherd, learned to make his own damn cheese and given up his damn magic. But no, he’d had to come back to his Eighth year, hadn’t he? And this was his life now. Draping himself over Potter to hear words from him that he knew Potter wouldn’t ever mean.Great. The school year ahead of him looked simply great.“All I know is—when I’m with you, I…” Potter, the heathen, grunted when he read the rest of his line. “Do I really need to say this?”“What, scared of believing your own words, Scarhead?” Draco spat.“Boys,” O’Neill warned them.“All I—all I know is you’re the most amazing person with weak ankles that I've ever met, Meg.” Potter scowled. He was blushing again. “And when I’m with you, I feel less alone.”

My favorite eight year Drarry of all time, probably. I had never before experienced such a beautiful balance of the aftermath of the horrifying events of the war and how they impacted each character, and the light feeling of youthful fun. There are so, so many things to love in the 44k words that make up this masterpiece, so many details that warmed my heart and made me melt inside, so many moments that had me laughing or clutching my chest. In here, you’ll find quite a lot of Hercules references, wonderful teachers, drama club, healing, characters learning to trust, learning to love, learning to cope, beautiful friendships, hopeful romance. It is everything. I talked more about this fic in this individual rec, and I will absolutely talk MORE about it if given the chance. Everyone should read this. 

8. Tease Crossed, Eyes Dotted With A Little Heart - @diligent-thunder - 18k - M -  Draco's a curse-breaker, Harry's an Auror, and they're... something? Maybe? It depends. Harry definitely wants to get laid, Draco wants to follow procedure, and their work wives just want them to stop hiding from the truth. 

I hope you’re not sick of my rambling yet because oooooh boy, THIS ONE. It’s funny, in the way that makes you cover your mouth because you’re about to burst out laughing on the bus, it’s hot, in that casual way that makes you clear your throat and shift your phone just a little, just so the screen can’t be seen by the person sitting beside you because like HELL are you going to stop reading now, it’s sweet, in the way that makes you smile so hard your cheeks hurt, and it’s so detailed and all around so, so much fun to read, in the way that grips you and doesn’t let you go, only to release you when it’s over so you can go and recommend it to your friends, IT’S. SO. GOOD. Real quick: auror + cursebreaker pairing, are-they-friends-with-benefits-or-more, guess-they’d-have-to-actually-TALK-to-know-that, teasing each other in public, getting trapped together for a bit there, powerful female characters, should you guys really be flirting right now? and MORE. Listen, just go read it now and thank me later. 

9. That which hurts (and is desired) - @shealwaysreads - 19k - E - Draco was lying still, and pale, on a bed in a private room in St Mungo’s. The sheets were white, clean, enchanted against stains, vanishing the blood that kept spilling out of him. He hadn’t moved in two days. Not a twitch of his elegant fingers. Not a blink of his fierce eyes. Harry couldn’t even see the faint flutter of his pulse in his throat from where he stood at the foot of the bed, helpless, impotent, furious.

This fic is written so, so beautifully that it aches and leaves such an impression that, thinking back on it, every emotion hits me just as hard as it did when I was reading it. Everything Harry felt, I felt, every moment where he found himself just a little bit more in love with Draco, I was there, every moment of his frustration when Draco is hit with a curse nobody can decipher, I was there for it. With non-linear storytelling, it is evocative, a masterclass in narration, pacing, characterization and beautiful, lyrical writing. I nearly have no words for it. It features: auror partners that work together seamlessly, a dash of pining, a helping of very, very hot sex, and a love story that feels soft like a dream and thrilling like a race. This was the very last story I read in 2019, and I could not have ended the year on a better note. Definitely check this one out.

10. For Thine Is The Kingdom - @kedavranox - 66k - E - On a secret mission, Draco is Turned. With no memory of what happened, he learns that to save his missing Auror partner and regain what he’s lost, he must uncover the long-buried secrets of the vampire covens. To do that, Draco must open his mind and heart to what he has become, the new-found family that surrounds him, and the man who has remained steadfast at his side through it all.Harry spent five years avoiding the man he fell in love with, but when Draco needs his help, he cannot refuse. As they race against the clock to find Draco’s partner, Harry discovers that the bond they share is nothing to hide from, and that he'll never outrun the pace of his own heart.

And last but absolutely not least, there’s this freaking diamond of a story. I swear I want to squeal whenever I remember it. I’ll be brief: it is one of my absolute favorite fics of all time. In here, there’s vampires, unspeakables, a big investigation, wonderful side characters and information given in small little doses as we learn alongside the characters and piece together an entire picture. It’s dazzling, incredibly detailed in every way, with shades to each character and nuances to every interaction and bit of magic we get to see. I feel like anything I can say is not enough, I can never do this story justice. I have tried before, and written the gushiest individual fic rec of my LIFE but just- I honestly have no more words to express how much I think everyone needs to read this. Please, check that rec out, please, check this story out. There is absolutely nothing like it.

----

And that wraps it for 2019! Thank you to all who take the time to check out my lists, and THANK YOU specially if you give these incredible stories a chance, because they deserve all the love in the world. Once again: All the way from here, behind a username and a few tumblr posts, I can honestly say that these 30 stories made my year. I hope they can make yours, too ❤️ If you ever want to discuss these (for tag concerns or plain flailing) (or any story really) my DM’s are always open!!!

#drarry #drarry fic #drarry fanfic #drarry fic recs #draco malfoy #harry potter #drarry fic rec #drarry rec list #2019rec #ficrec

[hotpinkhoshi]

the pact (2)

pairing: jinyoung x reader

genre: romance, smut, a lil angst

warnings: sexual content, cursing, alcohol, cliche fwb to lovers, fuckboy!jb

word count: 7.4k

summary: you desperately need to get over your decade-long crush on lim jaebeom, and your close friend jinyoung needs to get over his ex—so the two of you make an arrangement: just sex, no feelings. what could go wrong?

a/n: first of all, thank you all so so so much for the love for the first part! i was so nervous posting and it completely blew my mind to get such a good response. this part is a bit longer and the smut is a bit more ... smutty lolol so just be aware of that. again please let me know your thoughts/feels it absolutely makes my day :) enjoy! 

(part one here)

The rest of the weekend went quickly, considering you ended up sleeping until nearly twelve o’clock Saturday afternoon. 

You honestly thought the night before had been a dream, until you’d tripped on the box of condoms laying on the floor on your way to the bathroom to pee. Vaguely, you remembered Jinyoung tossing them there just before…

Groaning, you stared at your reflection in the mirror. Surely, you’d made a mistake. A big one—risking one of your longest friendships just for one night of blissful ignorance. This was not something you would normally do.  

While you weren’t nearly as calculated and cautious as Jinyoung, you usually knew better than to make hasty decisions, especially ones that could cost you your relationship with your loved ones. 

Filled with guilt and regret low in your stomach, you trudged back into your bedroom to check your phone. There were more than a few drunken snaps from the boys that had gone out last night, including one of Jackson drinking some concoction from a wine glass that made you shudder.

No texts, though. Honestly, you weren’t sure if that was a good thing or not. You’d half expected Jinyoung to text you as soon as he got home, telling you he’d made a terrible mistake and that he’d rather not talk to you ever again.

However, it felt strange that he hadn’t messaged you at all, for a reason you couldn’t quite put your finger on. This had been what you’d wanted, right? Just two friends helping each other out, no extra strings involved. And Jinyoung had never been the type to text more than necessary.

This thought relieved some of your worries, enough that you could put your phone down and venture out to get some food in your stomach. You weren’t hungover, necessarily, but you felt the effects of staying up too late and to be frank, you were sore. 

If Sana had any idea what had gone on last night after she retired to bed, she kept it hidden well. She was sitting at the kitchen island, scrolling through her phone and eating lunch. 

“Good morning,” you muttered, praying the tee you’d chosen had a high enough neck to keep your marks from Jinyoung hidden. The last thing you needed was for Sana to see a hickey that you most definitely did not have the last time she’d seen you.

“Do you mean good afternoon? What time did you get to bed last night, anyway?” Sana asked, spoon of soup halfway to her lips. 

You turned to the cupboard and pretended to mull over which mug you wanted to use for coffee. “Um, maybe... two? Not more than an hour after you went to bed...” 

“Hm,” she replied, and you held your breath waiting to see if she would say anything else to indicate she knew something had happened. “Oh my god, look at this video of a corgi my cousin tagged me in.”

Your entire body relaxed as you turned back to your roommate to watch the video on her phone. Maybe you had gotten away with it after all. 

~~~

The rest of the weekend, you found yourself back at work even though you weren’t scheduled to be there. There was always work to do, and it kept your mind busy to focus on something besides your reckless decisions. 

By Sunday evening, you’d outlined an entire business plan to get your sales back up before the summer hit, reorganized the entire cookbook section, and laid out next month’s employee schedule. 

Yugyeom made your life a little easier by staying until close, placing sale stickers on old paperbacks that you’d been trying to sell for months. He’d talked your ear off about Friday night, filling in all the details that you never asked for. 

“I’m not kidding, noona, this guy was two seconds from sucker punching Jackson just because he accidentally made out with his fiance. But she wasn’t wearing an engagement ring! I checked!” 

This was part of the reason you never went out with the guys when they hit the clubs. It was always fun until inevitably one of them caused utter chaos that you found yourself involved in every time, if only to try and diffuse the situation. 

You were becoming too old for the nightlife scene, you figured. 

“That’s crazy.” 

“I know!” Yugyeom placed his next sticker harshly, almost knocking over the entire pile. “But apparently, there is a God, because at that moment, a bachelor party came through the crowd and we lost them.”

You were about to mutter another ‘wow’ or ‘that’s crazy’ when the front door jingled. Just as you were about to tell the customer you closed in a few minutes, your words died in your throat. It wasn’t just any customer, it was Jinyoung. 

For a moment, you forgot that you’d just seen him naked two days ago. He was just Jinyoung, your oldest friend. 

“Jinyoung!” you exclaimed, setting down your clipboard. 

He offered you a smile, running his fingers through his hair before shoving his hands in his pockets. “Hey. Sorry, I know you guys close soon. I just wanted to see if you’d gotten a particular book in.” 

Nodding, you came out from behind the counter once he told you the title, leading him to the row of shelves where you kept the new releases. You shouted back for Yugyeom to lock the front door and clock out a while, since this wasn’t the first time you’d let Jinyoung in the store past closing time. 

“Ah, right here,” you said, pulling the book from the shelf and placing it in Jinyoung’s hands. 

It wasn’t until you made eye contact with him, his shoulder close enough to brush against yours, that you had a flashback to the other night. His head between your thighs, your fingers laced into his hair. 

You looked down abruptly, tucking your hands into the pockets of your cardigan. “Anything else I can help you find?” 

Jinyoung didn’t answer at first, just rubbed the back of his neck and exhaled slowly. “Actually, I wanted to talk to you. About Friday.” He lowered his voice, leaning close enough you could smell his cologne. 

You swallowed. “Okay.” 

“I wanted to apologize,” he said, taking you by surprise. 

“For what?”

Jinyoung sighed, chewing his lip with his teeth for a moment. “I was worried that I took advantage of you. You were drinking, you were upset, and maybe you didn’t exactly have a clear head.” 

Somehow, his response was a relief. You’d been expecting him to have regrets for completely different reasons than just his conscience. 

“I wasn’t drunk,” you told him, shaking your head. “I was basically sober. And yeah, I was upset, but... I don’t regret it. I think I needed it.” 

Jinyoung looked relieved as well. His shoulders visibly relaxed and he raised his brows. “Me too, actually. It’s hard to explain, but--”  

“I get it,” you said, because you were sure you did, without him saying the words. “It reminded you Yeri isn’t the only girl in the world that could want you?” 

Jinyoung nodded. “Same for you?” 

“Yeah. Except I know Jaebeom doesn’t want me, not the way I want him to. I just needed to see that someone else could. Plus, it was a nice distraction, right?” You smiled, trying to lighten the mood. 

“Exactly,” he chuckled. “A really nice distraction.” 

Again, you were reminded of the way it felt to have his skin against yours and the weight of his body on you. The way his teeth grazed your neck. It was hard to forget, considering you’d had to layer up concealer over the purple marks that just barely peeked over the collar of your shirt. 

There was an air of awkwardness between the two of you, but that was to be expected, you figured. It didn’t make you regret that night or want to do it again any less. 

“Well, what are friends for, right?” you joked, and Jinyoung let out a lighthearted laugh. Your stomach flipped ever so slightly that you could make him laugh like that, for some reason. You’d never cared before. 

“Right,” he agreed. “Also, finding incredible books.” He held up the one in his hand, which served as a reminder that Yugyeom was still in the store somewhere, and he had a way of popping up places you didn’t expect him to be.

“Here, let me get you checked out and you can head home.” 

You led Jinyoung back to the register, already feeling so much better about the whole situation. You hadn’t lost him forever, which was truly what you’d been worried about. 

But you realized that was a silly notion. You’d both wanted it, and frankly, you’d both needed it. 

After ringing up Jinyoung’s book, you walked him out of the store to bid him goodbye, letting him know to text you to let you know how the book was. Just like you normally would. 

~~~

It wasn’t until Wednesday night that you found yourself contemplating texting Jinyoung. To be specific, texting Jinyoung for sex. It still sounded absolutely ridiculous in your head, but it was the truth. 

You’d spoken a few times, no more than usual, mostly about his new read and other random things that came up. It appeared that your friendship would continue as normal. 

Then Jaebeom had texted you. In the middle of the week, during your lunchtime, a simple ‘hey :)’ that had you gawking at your phone and almost choking on your chicken salad. 

Since you weren’t an idiot and you were committed to truly moving on from your infatuation, you ignored it. But you couldn’t help thinking about it for the rest of the day, even after you arrived home. 

You needed a distraction, and you needed it bad. 

you: hey you: are you home from work?

Jinyoung: Yeah, why?

you: ...can I come over?

Jinyoung: Of course.

Even though he texted like a robot, you knew he would have said no if he really didn’t want you coming over. You prayed he understood the implications of your visit, that you weren’t just coming over to discuss the weather. 

Jinyoung lived close enough that you were at his apartment within half an hour, a modest but definite upgrade from your tiny two bedroom. 

Somehow, you pushed your nerves down by the time Jinyoung answered the door, dressed in a simple black long sleeved tee and his work khakis. You now appreciated him in this outfit in a way you wouldn’t have a week ago. 

“Hey,” he said, inviting you inside. “I was just finishing up a quick dinner. Are you hungry?”

“Mm,” you replied, inhaling the scent of frying veggies and garlic. “Actually, yeah. What did you make?” 

“Just some stir fry and ramen, nothing special,” he told you, leading you into the kitchen with a hand at the small of your back. It sent tingles up your spine, and something told you it was intentional on his part. 

Once he sat you down at the kitchen island on one of the stools there, you watched as he made the finishing touches to the pan he had warming on the stove. 

You hadn’t been to his place in a while, but it looked like nothing had changed. It was clean, even the kitchen, despite the fact that he’d been making dinner. When you made dinner, it looked like a tornado hit the kitchen. 

There weren’t many personal touches in his space, but enough for you to recognize it as Jinyoung’s. A photo of himself and his parents on the fridge, an old record player set up in the corner, and bookshelf stuffed full with novels in the living room. The open floor plan made his apartment appear much bigger than it was, in reality, but you preferred it over your cluttered space. 

“Here, try this,” Jinyoung said, holding a wooden spoon in front of your lips. You obeyed, letting him feed you the broth. 

It was delicious. You’d never eaten anything he’d prepared as far as you could remember, but you were thoroughly impressed so far. 

“Mm, I had no idea you were such a great cook.” 

He chuckled, shaking his head and walking back over to finish up the food. “I’m not. I just know how to follow a recipe, that’s all.” 

“Yeah, so do I, but somehow it always ends up terrible.” 

“That’s because you’re actually awful at following a recipe,” he said as he turned back to you, a bowl of ramen in one hand and a plate of stir fry in the other. 

You gasped, offended. “I am not!” 

Jinyoung raised a brow. “Remember that cooking class we had to take in high school? You messed up banana bread. There are like, four ingredients in banana bread.” 

“Well, the recipe was wrong.” You pressed your lips together defiantly. “It didn’t taste that bad, anyway.” 

Jinyoung set your meal down in front of you, then leaned his elbows on the counter and stared at you. “Are you sure about that?”

You pouted. You vaguely remembered your teacher immediately coughing and grabbing for a napkin to spit your banana bread out into. Jinyoung, at the time, hadn’t even laughed at you even while everyone else did. He just came over to your station while everyone else was cleaning up, going over the recipe with you to find where you’d gone wrong. 

“Well, I’ve gotten better since then. Maybe.” 

Jinyoung chuckled, turning away from you once more to grab his own plates. “I believe you, though you might have to prove it to me sometime.” 

“I will,” you told him firmly. “But it definitely won’t smell or taste as good as this.” 

And it did taste good, once you took your first bite. Better than good. It’d been a long time since you’d had a warm, home cooked meal. You’d been lazy these days, heating up instant meals or ordering takeout. This was a welcome change. 

While the two of you ate, you mostly talked about your days at work. Nothing in particular, but the conversation flowed the way it did between two friends that had known each other as long as you’d known Jinyoung. Even the silence while you ate was comfortable. 

After you both finished with your meal, you stood and insisted on gathering up the dishes. If you couldn’t cook him a decent meal to return the favor, you’d at least help clean up. 

You stacked the plates, dumping the bits of food left over into the trash and rinsing off the plates. When you turned back around from the dishwasher, you found Jinyoung much closer to you than he had been a minute ago. 

“You really don’t have to do that,” he told you, crowding you against the sink. He placed his hands on the counter on either side of you, boxing you in. “But thank you.” 

You shivered, looking up at him and nodding meekly. “You’re welcome.” Your voice came out much quieter than intended. 

“Now,” he said, moving even closer until you felt his hips pressing into yours. “How about dessert?” 

It would have sounded cheesy coming from anyone else, but from him, it sent a wave of heat through your body. After all, this was what you came for. 

When Jinyoung finally leaned in to press his lips into yours, you relaxed, sliding your hands up his torso until they rested on his chest. Though neither of you had any alcohol in your system, you felt more at ease than you had the other night. 

You knew he wanted you, and you both knew your intentions. There was no reason to worry. As a bonus, you could freely move about his apartment without trying to be quiet. 

Jinyoung kissed you as if he’d been thinking of this all day, like he’d been waiting to feel your lips against his and your tongue dipping into the wetness of his mouth. It’d been so long since anyone kissed you the way Jinyoung did. 

Though you’d been intoxicated beyond coherence, you had committed your one kiss with Jaebeom to memory at this point. He’d kissed you lazily—like he knew you weren’t going anywhere, like it could have been anyone and it wouldn’t have made a difference. 

Jinyoung was receptive when he kissed, as if gauging your reactions to each of his movements and using the knowledge to make your knees weak. Each lick, kiss, and bite was perfectly calculated to prepare you for the pleasure he would bring you later. 

For a while, you simply just kissed. His hands traveled from the counter to your hips, sliding them upwards until they were on your skin underneath of your simple white shirt. This could have been enough for you, honestly. The way he melted his lips into yours was warming your entire body, just aching to be closer to him in whatever way you could. 

When you pulled away, it was only to drag Jinyoung’s sweater up off of his torso and drop it to the floor. It still surprised you to see how fit he was, even more so in much better lighting this time—despite having just eaten a full meal. How had he been hiding this from you for so long? 

You wanted to give his physique the proper attention it deserved, so you ran your fingertips down his solid chest, until they grazed over the ridges of his abs. You licked your lips, imagining what it would be like to run your tongue over the skin there. 

He had just the lightest happy trail leading you right to the button on his khakis. Your eyes traveled back up his body until you locked eyes with him, where you found him staring at you hungrily. 

“Jinyoung… can I…?” You started, popping open the button with your index finger. 

His eyes widened ever so slightly once he realized what you meant. “Yes. God, yes.” 

So you dropped to your knees right on the kitchen floor, tipping your chin up to maintain eye contact. “I kept thinking about this, you know.” You willed yourself not to blush and betray your nerves. 

“Yeah?” he asked, running his teeth over his bottom lip. “What else have you thought about?”

You slid the zipper of his khakis down, revealing the plain black boxer briefs underneath. The fabric strained, fighting a losing battle with the bulge it was trying to contain. “The way you fit inside me—god, it felt perfect, Jinyoung.” 

You teased the waistband with your fingers, your eyes traveling up his body once more until you could look up at him, blinking innocently. “I kept wondering how you’d taste. If you’d feel just as perfect like this.” 

For the most part, Jinyoung kept his composure, but you knew him well enough to see beyond the steeled expression on his face. How his jaw tightened, his knuckles turning white as they gripped the countertop in front of him. The barely detectable hitch in his breath.

“Go ahead and find out.” 

You sat back on your heels, your hand dipping inside his waistband to grip his erection. You were grateful for the lighting of the kitchen, allowing you to see up close just how flawless he was, from head to toe. 

Jinyoung inhaled sharply as you freed his cock from inside of his khakis, your fingers wrapping around the middle of his shaft. You realized just how much you’d missed out on the other night.

Your eyes stayed on him as you leaned forward, sticking your tongue out flat as you ran it up the underside of the shaft. Though he didn’t make a noise, you caught the way his eyelashes fluttered and his gaze darkened. 

You placed a wet kiss at the tip of his cock before you began to take him into your mouth. Slowly. You wanted him to feel every inch of your mouth as it surrounded him, desperate to break his steady demeanor. 

One of his hands released its grip from the countertop, coming to the side of your face to brush your hair away, his thumb stroking your cheek. “So,” he said, “how does it feel, angel? Good?”

You batted your eyelashes up at him, your mouth still wrapped around his shaft. You weren’t quite ready to pull away, so you just nodded your head, careful not to let any bit of his cock slip out. 

The way Jinyoung smirked back down at you sent warmth straight between your thighs, causing you to squeeze your knees together from where you sat on the cold kitchen floor. 

Giving head had never been your favorite. You didn’t hate it, but something about it made you feel awkward and sometimes uncomfortable. It caused you a pinch of anxiety, worrying that you’d do something wrong or embarrassing like choke or accidentally bite down. 

However, you were loving this. You really had fantasized about it all week, though you weren’t sure why, considering you never had before. Something about having this power over Jinyoung, even as he stared down at you with such a domineering gaze, turned you on beyond words. You were hungry for it for the first time. 

Jinyoung slipped his fingers through your hair, gripping onto the strands to gently guide your mouth off of him, then pushed with the lightest pressure so you’d take him in again. You let your eyes fall closed, your hands traveling up his thighs to give yourself something to hold onto. 

You let him set the pace with his hand at the back of your head. He was gentle with you, but you knew he was holding back. He’d looked the same the other night. His brow twitched, and his lips pressed firmly together. 

“You’re doing so well,” he told you, his other hand coming to join the other at the back of your head, stroking your hair softly. 

Encouraged by his praise, you attempted to take just one extra inch inside your mouth on your next downstroke. You squeezed your eyes shut as the head hit the back of your throat, making you cough around his cock but you didn’t give up. 

“Oh, fuck,” Jinyoung whispered, just as he slipped past the resistance of your gag reflex and you dug your nails into the fabric of his pants.

When you opened your eyes to look up at him, you were pleased to see you had definitely had an effect on him. His head was thrown back, his face screwed up in pleasure. 

You continued. Working hard to train your throat to take more and more of him inside, even though your jaw ached and your throat was becoming sore. It was worth it for the quiet moans and groans you were pulling out of Jinyoung. 

“Oh, oh shit—“ Jinyoung said suddenly after a few more minutes, his hands tugging harshly on your hair to pull your mouth off of him. You winced at the sudden sharp pain at your scalp. “Fuck, I’m sorry, I just. You need to stop.”

You’d gotten lost in the act, only focused on one thing, you hadn’t realized just how hard he’d become. As curious as you were to see what it would feel like, what he’d look like coming into your mouth, you needed him inside of you.

Standing from the kitchen floor, you wiped at your mouth and chin with your sleeve. You didn’t realize how messy you’d gotten.

Jinyoung didn’t waste much time. Your shirt was off in seconds, joining his sweater somewhere on the floor. His eyes caught sight of your marks, almost entirely faded but still visible. 

He ran the tip of his index finger down the side of your neck and along your collarbone, making you shiver. “Did anyone see these?” he asked, his eyes flicking up to meet yours. 

You shook your head. “No, I kept them covered. I had to use makeup the first couple of days, though.” 

You’d been paranoid all week, making sure the collar of your shirts covered all of the hickies Jinyoung had left on your skin. It wouldn’t have been a huge deal if you didn’t live with Sana—if she had seen, she would have had  too many questions and you were an awful liar. You would have broken in moments and told her everything. 

Jinyoung hummed, slipping his fingers back to the nape of your neck. “I guess this time I’ll have to mark you where no one can see them but me.” 

He pulled you in for a kiss, his other hand sliding down to your lower back so he could bring your bodies flush together. You moaned into his mouth, feeling his hardness pressed between you. 

Jinyoung’s hand slid around to the front of you, undoing your jeans with one hand while the other stayed buried in your hair. You helped him out, pushing your jeans down your hips and kicking them off once they’d gotten down to your shins. 

He parted from your lips after a moment and took his hands off of you, stepping back to take in your half naked frame. Your cheeks felt hot under his stare. He looked at you with such a lustful, predatory gaze that was totally new to you. Your skin tingled, just wanting to feel his touch once more. 

“You wanna know what I thought about these last few days?” He asked, running his tongue over his bottom lip, pink and slightly swollen from your kisses. 

All you could do was nod, your heart pounding in your chest. 

“All the sounds I could get you to make. I bet you sound incredible when you just let go, and especially when you come.” Jinyoung took one step towards you, trailing a fingertip down the front of your throat, down between the valley of your breasts. “Let’s see how loud you can be, hm?” 

You knew, deep in your soul, that Jinyoung could easily get you screaming and writhing underneath of him. It was as if the other night had just been a fraction of the pleasure he could give you. After all, you’d been forced to stay quiet and you’d been so nervous. But he had an air about him, a confidence that suggested he knew what he was doing, and exactly how to unravel you. 

When Jinyoung stepped forward again, this time he was grabbing you around the backs of your thighs, lifting you up to wrap your legs around him. He carried you the short distance over to the couch, setting you down so you perched on the back edge. 

“Remember what I promised?” 

How could you forget? The image he’d painted into your mind while he was thrusting inside of you, of your body bent over the back of his couch, letting the entire world hear just how good he could make you feel. It had replayed in your mind countless times since then.

“Yes,” you answered, hands gripping onto the fabric of the couch on either side of you. 

“Spread your legs,” he told you, then kneeled down in front of you. You obeyed. You could feel his eyes raking over you once more, which never affected you any less. Had he ever looked at you like this before? It was taking the breath right from your chest. “Take that off.” 

As he nodded to your top half, you reached behind yourself, unclasping your bra before letting it fall away. You would have done whatever he asked right now, no question. All you could see in your haze of desire was Jinyoung. You shivered and noticed his window was open, letting a light breeze drift across your half naked frame. 

God, he really did want all of his neighbors to hear you. 

Just as he did last time, he started slow. He propped one of your legs up on his shoulder, turning his head to place gentle kisses on your inner thighs. His hands kept your legs spread to his liking, giving him ample room where he knelt. 

If anything, he was teasing you more this time around. Maybe because it was just you and him, no time constraints, no reason to keep your pleasure to yourselves. You were screwed, if your first experience with him was just a warm up. 

You tipped your head back and closed your eyes, basking in the gentle ministrations of his mouth. He hadn’t even gotten to your heat yet, just nuzzling your thighs and leaving wet kisses on your skin. Every now and then, he stopped to suck at your skin, undoubtedly leaving a hickey in his wake. 

When you felt his teeth sink into your thigh, you gasped, lowering your chin to look down at him. He raised a brow to check that you were okay, you nodded eagerly. Though most probably wouldn’t expect it from you, you absolutely loved when men were a bit more rough with you. Nothing too crazy, but you craved the delicate balance between pain and pleasure. 

Jinyoung finally led his kisses upwards, closer and closer to your core. When his lips met the edge of your panties, he pulled back to remove them, sliding the lace down your legs until they dropped off your ankle. 

His burning gaze scanned over you once more, full of hunger, before he finally leaned in and got to work. The moment his tongue touched your clit, your mouth fell open and your nails dug into the upholstery you were keeping balance on. 

Even just the slightest kitten licks he started with had your hips twitching up towards his face, causing his hands to come around your waist, holding you in place. You had thought of him all week, just like this, more times than you would admit to him or yourself. He’d worked magic with his tongue, and you’d been desperate to feel it again. 

At a perfectly angled flick of his tongue, you moaned out his name instinctively, which just encouraged him even more. He was pulling out all the stops, you figured, determined to have you noisy as could be. 

“Fuck, right there,” you moaned, your hand reaching for the back of his head. 

Jinyoung scooted closer, grabbing both of your thighs to hook them over his shoulders, while his tongue drifted down to your center to taste you there. He hummed as soon as your wetness hit his tongue, the vibrations going straight to your clit. He really wanted to drive you crazy. 

He pulled back just enough to circle his index and middle fingers around your entrance, coating them with your arousal before they pushed inside. You whimpered, your walls clamping on his digits. 

“Tell me how it feels,” he told you, his voice deep and laced with want.

Your eyes opened and you lifted your head, tilting your face down to watch him. “So—fuck, so good,” you started, biting hard onto your lower lip as you watched him twist his fingers inside of you. “I thought about this so many times,” you admitted. 

“Yeah?” he asked, leaning in to suck at your clit for a long moment just because he could. Your hips lifted as he pulled away, whining when the sensation of his mouth left you. “Did you touch yourself?”

Your throat went dry as you stared down at him, cheeks going red as you thought back to the other night in bed. You’d tossed and turned, debating with yourself. It seemed to cross a line, somehow, to touch yourself while thinking of him. But you’d lost the battle, eventually shoving your hands into your sweatpants and rubbing yourself to your peak. 

“Yes,” you answered, swallowing. “I had to. I couldn’t stop thinking about your mouth on me.” 

Jinyoung had the nerve to smirk, his fingers still working in and out of you. “Dirty girl,” he teased, his voice condescending in a way that sent a tingle straight to your core. “Did you come?” 

You could only nod, unable to form words with the way he was fucking his fingers into you. He looked awfully pleased with your answer, and you couldn’t believe how hot it was. He’d always been cocky, but you had no idea it would turn you on so much. 

Just as you expected him to continue eating you out, he stood from between your legs, his fingers sliding out of you. He silenced your protesting with his lips on yours, kissing you hard enough to take your breath away. 

As he pulled away, he grabbed your hips and forced you to stand. “You want to see what I’ve been thinking about all week?” He turned you around, sliding his arms tenderly around your waist and placing a kiss to your shoulder. “Bend over, angel. And don’t move.” 

His touch left you then as he walked away. You stood there, bent over the couch with your arms folded in front of you for what felt like an hour but in reality, was probably less than a minute. You’d never felt so exposed, quite literally, even though you’d made sure that his curtains were closed and you weren’t giving any of his neighbors a free show.

When Jinyoung returned, you heard the clinking of his pants and underwear being shoved to the floor, then the foil of the condom wrapper. You waited, obedient as ever, while Jinyoung rolled the condom onto himself. It felt like your heart was about to pound right out of your chest in anticipation.

“Ready?” he asked, sliding his hand down from your shoulder blades to your lower back. 

“Mm,” you responded, arching your back. 

As he sank into you, you both let out sighs of pleasure. You felt like you’d memorized how he had felt inside of you before, but this was entirely new. The way his hips aligned with yours was heavenly, his cock angling inside of you just right. 

“Oh. Oh my God,” you moaned, your hands grasping onto the couch. “Don’t move for a sec, okay?” 

He listened, caressing your back with his hands and rubbing circles into your skin. “You okay?” he asked. 

“Yeah, you’re just—big,” you said, blushing and glancing back at him.

He managed not to smirk at you this time, but you knew he wanted to. Every guy liked to hear his dick was big, you were almost positive of that. As your walls stretched to accommodate him, you nodded at him, signaling for him to continue. 

Jinyoung set a slow but deep pace inside of you and it had you moaning every time he bottomed out. He was muttering words of praise, mostly inaudible, but you could barely focus on anything besides the way he was pushing into your g-spot. 

You made up for his silence. Moaning his name, louder and louder as he picked up his pace. Your head dipped forward to rest against your arm, one hand covering your mouth to silence a particularly loud cry. 

Before you even realized what was happening, Jinyoung tore your hand away from your mouth. “I don’t think so,” he told you. He reached around you, relentless with his thrusts, and grabbed both of your hands. He pulled both of your arms behind you until he had your wrists linked behind your back, clasped underneath of his palm.

“Fuck, Jinyoung, I can’t—“ you whined, pressing your forehead into the cushion. 

“You can,” he responded. “I told you, I want you loud. Tell me what you need.”

“You’re—” you started, letting out a strangled moan, “so good. Fuck me harder, please. Please.” 

His hips snapped against you in a forceful thrust, pushing you forward into the couch, but you loved it. The noises he had you making were louder and dirtier than anything that had ever come out of your mouth with previous partners. You were still getting used to the fact that Jinyoung could get you to this place, so needy and desperate.

Jinyoung’s pace inside of you got faster, and you drowned out the sounds of his skin hitting yours with your moans, the volume reaching new heights when he reached around with his free hand to rub your clit. 

“Are you close?” he asked, leaning forward to kiss your shoulder. “You’re so tight. Jesus.” 

You nodded. “I-I’m so close, Jinyoung. Please, please, don’t stop.” 

For once, Jinyoung was the obedient one, driving into you at a consistently breathtaking pace. All you could think about was the way he felt inside of you and his two fingers drawing patterns on your clit. 

“Come on, baby,” he whispered near your ear, “Be a good girl for me.” 

That was all it took. Somewhere, in the back of your head, you knew you were too loud. It was the middle of the evening, there was no way there wouldn’t be a noise complaint called into his landlord. But you couldn’t help it. 

The heat in your belly spread to flames, engulfing your entire body as you came, hard, around him. He practically had you sobbing, your hands pinned behind your back giving you absolutely nothing to hold onto. You were completely at his mercy. 

Jinyoung at least let you rest for a moment, slowing his movements inside of you. He dropped your hands and you slumped over the couch, your thighs still twitching with the aftershocks. 

“Come here,” he said, gently pulling you up to a full standing position and turning you around, his cock slipping out of you. Just that was enough to make you whimper, too oversensitive from your orgasm. 

He lifted you up again, carrying you around to the other side of the couch. Laying you down, he climbed on top of you. You were finally coherent enough to wrap your arms around him, pulling him down for a kiss. 

As great as your previous position had been, you had missed seeing his face, which was unexpected but you decided to push that feeling down. 

When he pulled away, you locked eyes with him and nodded, silently signaling for him to continue. You wanted to make him feel good, wanted him to reach euphoria just as you had, though it’d be a much quieter experience. 

You exhaled when he slipped back inside of you, your walls still wet and eager for him, if not more so now. He kept eye contact with you as if he knew that’s what you had been missing before. His gaze was so intense it had you pulsing between your legs all over again. 

This time, his pace wasn’t as quick or forceful, but he was still reaching spots inside of you that made you shiver. One hand came up to the side of your face, stroking his thumb over your cheek gently, contrasting with the way he was pushing inside of you. 

You wrapped your arms around him, pressing your fingers into the skin of his shoulder blades. He groaned and leaned his forehead against yours, thrusting into you deep. 

“Right there,” you told him, resisting every urge to squeeze your eyes shut. You wouldn’t come again, you were too worn out, but you knew he was capable of taking you there, if he had a little less mercy.

Jinyoung’s thrusts got faster, a bit less controlled, hinting that he wouldn’t last much longer. “Fuck, Y/N,” he panted. He dropped his head down, kissing down your jaw to your throat. “Gonna come soon.”

“Please,” you breathed, mustering the strength to roll your hips up to meet his next thrust. “I want it, Jinyoung, please.”

With a few more thrusts, he suddenly slowed to a stop, his entire body stiffening as he came. His teeth scraped against your skin, hard enough to nearly break skin. The sound he made was one you wanted to remember forever.

Jinyoung stilled inside of you after a moment, pressing his lips into your skin one final time before he pulled away. “Are you okay?” he asked, not because he was worried but just because he cared. 

“Mhm,” you answered. “Legs are jelly still, though.” 

He chuckled lowly and sat up, sliding out of you. “Should I apologize or say you’re welcome?” 

You slapped playfully at his chest and sat up as well. “Loser. Get me a towel, please?” 

~~~

Once you’d gotten cleaned up and your clothes back on, you and Jinyoung sat on the couch, Netflix playing some true crime documentary you’d both seen the first episode of before and never continued. Neither of you were one to binge TV. Books, however, were a different story. 

The way you were curled up on the couch could have appeared rather romantic, but it was mostly because your legs were already sore from bending over the back of the couch. Or so you told yourself. 

You leaned into Jinyoung’s side, his arm thrown over the cushion beside you. The evening was still young, and you’d both figured there was no need for you to leave so soon. Besides, it made the whole situation feel cheap if you left within five minutes of having an orgasm. 

“Have you ever wondered how many serial killers you’ve sold books to?” Jinyoung asked, breaking the silence. 

You stared at him, furrowing your eyebrows. “No. But now I will, asshole.” He grinned, running his fingertips up and down the curve of your shoulder. “Oh, God. Probably so many.” 

“You know that guy with the big cowboy belt? The one that’s always buying the sleazy novels?”

“Oh, definitely,” you answered, turning your head into his chest and giggling. “He always puts them face down as if I don’t know what I’m ringing up.” 

“If you disappear, I’ll be sure to let the police know to add him to the suspect list.” 

You huffed. “Thanks, Jinyoung.” 

“Anytime.” He gave you a shit eating grin, squeezing your shoulder. “Hey, you going to BamBam’s birthday thing on Saturday?” 

You hummed in response. “Are you?” 

“I thought about it. Been a while since I’ve been out to a club, though. I’m afraid I’ll look like the old grumpy man in the corner.” 

The mental image had you giggling again. “I mean, you might. But yeah, I’ll be there. Need me to get you drunk to loosen you up?”

Jinyoung chuckled. “Maybe. As long as you don’t take advantage of me, try and drag me into any dark corridors...”

You feigned offense, a hand to your chest. “Would I do something like that?” 

“I don’t know,” he stared down at you, “would you?” 

You narrowed your eyes. “Never. I’m a lady.” 

Jinyoung snorted. “Pretty sure the noises you were making just a bit ago were not very ladylike.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you said. “I’m a respectable young woman.” 

When Jinyoung’s hand drifted down from your shoulder to your waist, pulling you closer, you stared up at him with raised eyebrows. “Do you need a reminder?” 

You swatted his hand away, wiggling away from him. “Oh my God, you’re insatiable. I’m still sore, you freak. Give me at least a 24 hour recovery period.” 

When his hand decided to squeeze and tickle your sides, you shrieked and tried to scoot away from him but he was too quick, grasping both your hips and keeping you in place. 

“I’ll give you something, alright,” he said, grinning down at you. “You’re gonna have to work on your stamina.” 

You tried and failed to move away from him, your hands weakly slapping at his shoulders while you giggled underneath of him. “Jinyoung!”

“Hmm, now that sounds familiar.” 

“I hate you so much,” you said around your laughs, practically gasping for breath now. Jinyoung finally relented, ceasing his tickling but remaining on top of you. 

“I doubt that,” he responded, leaning down to catch your lips with his. You relaxed under him, your hands clasping his shoulders as you deepened the kiss.

When you instinctively rolled your hips up towards the growing bulge in his pants, he pulled away, a shocked look on his face. “I thought you needed 24 hours?”

You scrunched your nose at him, pinching his ear. “Shut up and take my clothes off.” 

~~~

It turned out, you didn’t quite need as much recovery time as you thought. After Jinyoung brought you over the edge twice, one time with just his fingers and another deep inside of you, you both got dressed once more. 

Reminiscent of your first night together, Jinyoung smoothed your hair back away from your face and thumbed your chin as you stood by the door. “Drive safe.” 

“I will. Thanks,” you told him again, chewing your lip. “I’ll see you Saturday?” 

“Mm. Text me if you need me before then, okay?”

You both knew what he meant. Even as you walked out of his apartment down to your car, you had a feeling you’d be begging to see him long before Saturday arrived.

#got7 #got7 fanfic #jinyoung #park jinyoung #got7 fic #got7 smut #jinyoung fic #jinyoung smut #got7 scenario #got7 reaction #park jinyoung smut #jinyoung fanfic #got7 imagine #jinyoung imagine #writing

[subtlereferencetomyinterests]

Complexities Unknowable Chapter 3

Ao3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23274334/chapters/57175900

Chapter Two link: https://tha-best-url-evar.tumblr.com/post/614327945408987136/complexities-unknowable-chapter-two

MasterPost

Relationships: Established Relationship Dukeceit, eventual intrualiceit, background analogince.

Warnings: Remus says some things (mentions of biblically accurate angels, gore art description), food mention, mild sleep deprivation, cursing. As always everyone is sympathetic. Roast me if I forgot something. 

Word Count: 1,851

Remus was, once again, sitting on the counter in the light side kitchen. It was an ungodly early hour of morning, so the Commons were deserted. He was supposed to be waiting for Morality, according to the  spiteful little plot Dee had offered him that he hadn’t listened to all that well, but he surmised it meant he was supposed to fuck with a light side, so… Duh. Of course he was in.

Truth be told, three out of four of the self-proclaimed ‘light sides’ hardly bothered him! They were stuffy prudes, sure, but their insults slid off his back like blood off of steel. As long as he was doing his own thing with Deceit alongside him, everything was fine (he was still pointedly ignoring the existence of another Creativity). But looks like what Deceit wanted to do was torment Patton into, like, repenting? Or something? Like he said, he wasn’t listening.

Anyway! Waiting and watching was what he was doing! And doodling, because sitting still was literally impossible in Remus’ experience. Thankfully, he soon saw the paternal trait springing down the stairs. Straightening his back, The Duke put on his best intimidating face (which he thought looked rather silly, but Deceit assured him was very unsettling). He set down his sketchbook and blurred his edges. It didn’t work very well up here, but it was a little trick that they’d all- Virgil included- learned years ago. Honestly, he just used it to get cheap scares every now and then.

Patton strolled into the kitchen, whistling some jaunty tune and holy shit , Remus had figured it was some shtick, but was he just a cartoon character all of the time ? That was- sure, very adorable- but mostly all the more entertaining to scare!

“What’s up, Dilf!?”

Patton shrieked, nearly dropping a mug. With wide, startled eyes, he found the source of the noise. Said source watched the emotional trait force his expression into something amicable, laughing loudly.  

“Um- good morning, Remus! I, uh, didn’t see you there.”

“That was the point, MoMo,” Remus replied, dragging his claws screechingly down the side of a cabinet; Patton winced at the sound.

“Can I help you with anything?” Read: Why are you still here? Sometimes Remus wondered if he was too good at his job!

“Nope! Just enjoying the atmosphere, sketching, terrorizing…” He flipped onto his back, throwing his arm out and presenting his open notebook.

“You draw?” Patton seemed weirdly happy about that fact, managing a more natural smile. Seemed he thought he’d found something to work with, but that was likely to change.

“Of course I do, I am Creativity, after all! Here .” He handed over the sketchbook with a Cheshire smile. The creative trait had ensured it was flipped open to a detailed depiction of a being composed of several flaming rings, all of which absolutely covered with bloodshot eyes. It had an indiscernible amount of wings that could only be counted as ‘too many’. In the center of the rings was a swirling black void (a type of ink that took Remus weeks to conjure properly, thank you very much).

He watched carefully as Patton studied the image, looking bemused.

“It’s an angel!”

That seemed to only confuse the moral side more, making him tilt his head to a few different angles to look at the drawing. But he still didn’t seem upset by it, oddly enough.

“It certainly is an interesting interpretation,” He responded at last, “and all of these little lines must have taken you forever, that’s so impressive!”

Truth be told, they had taken a while, and Remus was very happy that the effort had been noticed- but that wasn’t the point!

“That’s nothing,” he took the sketchbook back from Patton and flipped through more pages. Aha! This would fuck him up, for sure! A full-color illustration of someone hung up on a meat hook, rib cage pried open like a spike trap to reveal very painstakingly rendered organs. He was actually quite proud of this one.

The only response that Patton gave, however, was a slight wrinkling of his nose when he first saw it, followed by more quiet observation.

“What do you think?” Remus prompted, watching as Patton set the drawing back down on the counter and began to assemble things for breakfast, seemingly unaffected.

“I wish I could draw that well, but I’m still not super good at it,” he said admiringly.

“I had to crack open my own ribs to make sure it was accurate, you know!”

Morality yelped at that one- score one for Remus! Finally!

“You wanna see my re-imaginings of my favorite Final Destination deaths? I’ve painted some with real- well, conjured- but real enough blood!”

But Patton didn’t even flinch this time; he looked more determined even!

“Art is a healthy outlet for expressing yourself,” he was almost certainly parroting Logan there, and he even seemed to believe the statement. Perhaps Remus would have to be a little more creative to get more reactions.

. “I agree! I didn’t expect you to have such an open-minded point of view. I’ll be sure you’re the first side to know when I make my next amateur taxidermy sculpture! Emphasis on the amateur!”

“Great!” Patton practically shouted, very stubbornly staring at the stove.

Before Remus had the chance to continue, the distinct sounds of Logan and Roman arguing their way downstairs met his ears, and he cut himself off. That was enough for one day, he decided. And anyhow, he looked forward to trying new ways to bother Patton next morning.

Deceit rose into the shadows of the Light Side commons with a smirk. It was an awful hour of the night, which was part of the plan. Not only was Patton the first awake in the morning, he was also often the last to sleep. Deceit supposed that Logan was looking after Roman and Virgil’s sleep schedules nowadays, which made it much easier to catch the artificial patriarch alone. That isn’t to imply that Dee had been tracking their schedules or anything, but the overwhelming lie that Morality surrounded himself with made him easy to track- especially in the night, when he had to pretend even harder that he was fine without the presence of his little family. Deceit entertained the idea that he should feel bad for the side, and maybe he did somewhere deep down. Deep, deep down. No, further than that.

Regardless of any such feelings, he was here to mess with Patton. Still unnoticed, he watched quietly as his target scrolled through Netflix, illuminated only by the dim glow of the television. The side looked so tired that he could’ve passed as a corpse, but gave a tiny smile after finally selecting whatever it was he was going to watch.

Wait. Wait. He was watching that ?

Deceit stared at the unmistakable green text that was the intro to The Good Place playing across the screen. If there was one thing he was expecting Patton to watch (Cartoons? Friends reruns? Slime videos?), it wasn't his own favorite show.

“Hm.” Deceit hummed.

In response, Patton shrieked and fell halfway off the couch. His head darted around until he finally spotted Deceit, who had slid down to sit on the sofa as well.

“Oh- um- good evening, Deceit! Wow, today is just full of surprises!”

“ Surely you won’t mind if I join you? This is one of my favorite shows, after all.”

Patton fixed his position so that he was no longer partially on the floor and looked the snake up and down. He paused the episode.

“ Really ?”

“Really,” and then, after some trepidation, “Honestly.”

Suddenly, Patton lit up dramatically, a happy smile stretching across his face. Fuck, wrong direction, Deceit wasn’t supposed to be cheering him up!

“I’m surprised that someone like you would like it,” Deceit continued hastily. Patton’s smile fell a little and he tipped his head in confusion.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean ,” He lounged back against the couch, “I didn’t think you’d approve of a show where all of the characters are such bad people .”

“What?! The whole point is that they aren’t bad!” Good, Back on track .

“Oh? Then what are they? Last I checked, the main character was very selfish .”

“I- okay, I see what you’re trying to do,” Patton turned to face Deceit entirely, “But they’re- they also-”

“Also what ?” Deceit was also sitting sideways on the couch now, his eyes glinting. He was certain that he’d talked the trait into a corner, which was why he was so utterly unprepared for Patton’s response.

“It’s, like, they all start off not great, but that’s because they were all set up for failure before the afterlife! They had it hard before dying, but when they were finally given the chance to actually get better, then they got better! They aren’t perfect , but they care about each other! And I think it really shows that sometimes, somebody can be wrong over and over and over again, but that doesn’t mean that they’re hopeless, or that they’re a bad friend, or…” He trailed off, looking down at his lap and blinking very quickly. “Or that they’re a bad person.”

Suddenly, Deceit wasn’t that sure that he wanted to see Patton upset anymore.

After a very uncomfortable silence that lasted far too long for his liking, the scaled side realized that he should probably be the one to say something.

“That’s…  a very in depth analysis, Morality. I’m inclined to agree with you.”

“Thanks,” Patton replied. When he looked up, his eyes held an odd recognition. It was a look that no Light Side had ever given Deceit, but they gave it to each other plenty of times. The side in question wasn’t sure if he liked it, but he sure knew that he was uncomfortable.

“So… The show…” He prompted.

“Oh, right!”

Patton pressed play.

Deceit had planned on doing some more provoking of Patton as they watched, but he found himself rather caught up in the program. The conversation he did end up making with the other incidentally slipped into chatting about their shared views on the show. It was almost nice. Maybe. Whatever.

After a few episodes, Deceit elected to return home for the night. As he was sinking out, he heard a sleepy voice bidding him farewell.

“G’night, Kiddo.”

He popped up in his bedroom after that, eyes quickly landing on a half-asleep Remus half-watching Saw 4 . The lights were dimmed to a glow, and the TV’s volume was so low that it might have been inaudible to anyone other than the more animalistic sides.

“You didn’t have to wait up for me,” Deceit murmured warmly, sitting beside his fellow Dark side. The trait yawned and rubbed his eyes, instinctively leaning into him.

“Wanted to,” he responded, voice groggy, “How’d it go?”

Deceit snapped his fingers to change into sleep clothes, reaching across Remus to flick off the lamp. As he settled in to semi-watch the movie, fingers automatically moving to card through his partner’s hair, he carefully considered the question.

“Fucking. Weird.”

Chapter 4

Tags: @deceits-left-glove​ @princemesscharming

#my writing #fanfiction #fanfic #sanders sides #ts #sanders sides fanfiction #Complexities Unknowable #deintruality #intrualiceit #dukeceit #demus #moceit #intruality #tw cursing #tw sleep deprivation #minor analogince #ya know as in blink and you'll miss it lol #creativitwins #patton #remus #deceit

[monstersandmaw]

Male dom orc x female sub reader (nsfw)

Edit which I’m including in all my works after plagiarism and theft has taken place: I do not give my consent for my works to be used, copied, published, or posted anywhere. They are copyrighted and belong to me.

This commission was posted first on my patreon for the lovely @rangerofthegods. They wanted a story with a couple who had been together for a little while, but who had not yet explored the idea of a d/s dynamic, despite both being into it. Consent and discussion were major themes that both of us were very keen to promote, so here you’ll find a budding relationship featuring very much consensual d/s play between a really big orc and his short human girlfriend. I hope you enjoy!

Wordcount: 8.5k Content: consensual d/s play between an established partnership, size difference, spanking, edging, aftercare, sex, ‘sir’, and praise kink.

Finally, ‘Bresz’ is pronouced ‘Bresh’, but with the ‘sh’ voiced as in Polish, with a voiced ‘sh’ rather than an unvoiced ‘sh’... so it’s kind of szch, but not quite...?

___

“I’ll be back in half an hour,” you called over your shoulder as you struggled and flailed slightly to get out of your barista’s apron. Grabbing the huge packed lunch, you waited for your friend - and technically your boss - to acknowledge, and you swiped the cardboard carrier for the two hot drinks off the counter before bolting out of the door.  

Normally, Bresz came to the cafe for his lunch, and that had been how your relationship with the big, confident, flirtatious orc had started, but today, you wanted to surprise him. You almost blushed as you recalled those early encounters where he’d shamelessly complimented you, leaning his muscular frame on the counter top while you tried not to send jets of hot steam up into your own face while making him coffee. It hadn’t taken him long to ask you out for dinner, and soon after that you’d made it official. Six months later, and you were happier than you’d ever been in your whole life.  

He still liked to treat you and surprise you, even though technically he was no longer courting you. He still brought you flowers, he still cooked you frankly enormous, thankfully nutritious meals, and he still let his gang of loud, obnoxious, big-hearted orc friends rib him mercilessly for still behaving like a courting male. Bresz gave zero fucks about that, and proudly declared that he was completely in love with his little human girl, often nuzzling his tusks gently into your neck until you giggled and squirmed, and he was able to pick you up. You liked that a lot more than you let on.  

But now it was your turn to do something for him, and you were determined not to be thwarted by the generous spirit of your massive orc. You raced down the street, praying you’d get to the kick boxing and martial arts gym before he left, and to your relief, the street was devoid of anyone even resembling your seven foot tall boyfriend.

Grinning, your hands full of lunch, you backed the door open and turned around, only to come face to face with a slender tiefling. The combination of her dark blue skin and the soft lighting of the reception had made her blend in with the shadows, and you almost screeched with surprise when you noticed her. “Belle!” you gasped. “You scared me!”

“I’m sorry,” she chuckled, stepping back and taking the weight of the door for you so that you could step inside without it smacking you in the back. She wore a tank top that showed off her enviable arms, but your eyes didn’t stay fixed on her for long because Bresz emerged from the changing rooms and you almost forgot how to speak again.  

“Hey!” exclaimed when he saw you standing there. His whole face lit up and he beamed a broad smile at you, thick, blunt tusks glinting, and his coppery brown eyes crinkling attractively at the corners. “What are you doing here? I was just on my way to come and see you!”  

And with that, he had strode over to you and put his hands on your waist. He picked you up and kissed you, holding you aloft with absolute ease, as though you weighed nothing at all. “Oof. Careful! I wanted to surprise you,” you grinned.  

“And now that I’m surprised?” he asked. He sniffed ostentatiously and his grin widened even further. “You brought food? Oh man, I’m the luckiest orc in the whole world.”

“And coffee,” you added. “Put me down now?”

He set you down and placed both his palms over his heart and tilted his head back, his long, beaded braid swinging free down his back. “My hero!”  

“Knock it off, you two,” Belle laughed playfully. “I swear, it’s sickening.”  

“C’mon,” Bresz snorted. “Ignore the jealousy of the loveless. Let’s get out of here.”  

Belle snorted. “Don’t let my girlfriend hear you say that, Big Guy.”

He flashed her a broad smile and turned his attention back to you. “It’s a gorgeous day. You want to go to the park?”

You nodded, and he blew Belle a playful raspberry as he guided you to the door and held it open for you. Belle punched him on his colossal bicep as he passed her, and he ignored it. He was too focused on you.  

He wore a loose, white tank top that showed his stunning figure and gorgeous, green skin off beautifully, and his black tracksuit hugged his bubble-butt in just the most perfect way. It was so hard to keep your hands off him. Luckily though, you had your hands full with the giant, brown paper bag of sandwiches and the carry-tray for the drinks. Well, you did, until he glanced down at you and gasped. “Shit, here, let me take them for you!”  

“Bresz,” you complained. “I’m perfectly capable of carrying a bit of lunch. I know you’re a huge beefcake, but I’m not that useless!”

“Oh I know,” he said, a sweet and affectionate look dawning on his handsome, rough-hewn face. “I just like spoiling you. Please?” he said, his eyes widening.

You rolled your own at him and said, “You know I can’t refuse those puppy dog eyes. Fine.” You slammed the sandwich bag into his solid chest, and he laughed.  

“You still up for our usual Friday night dinner at my place tonight?” he asked as you settled down onto the warm grass at the edge of the park. A black dog was barking and tearing around the place like a bat out of hell, and the two of you watched it while you spoke and ate.  

“Of course,” you said, chuckling as the Labrador leapt into the air, twisting half way to catch a frisbee that its owner had hurled an impressive distance for ir. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Oh, I don’t know,” he said, breaking off his gaze to look at you. He kissed your temple. “Just checking. You don’t always have to come over to mine…”

He was propped up on one arm, leaning close to you and casting a welcome, cool shadow across you, and you leaned your cheek against his arm for a moment before pressing a kiss into the dip of muscle at the base of his tricep. “I like your place,” you said. “Plus, you don’t fit in my bed.”

“You want dinner in bed? Or are you offering to be dinner?”

“Shut up,” you snorted. “You know what I meant. And you nearly broke mine the last time you came over and stayed the night.”

“Fair point. My place it is then.”

A shout from across the park made both of you look up, and you realised that the pink blur shooting towards you was the dog’s frisbee. Bresz chuckled and popped to his feet, catching it easily before it sailed all the way over and hit you, and sent it spinning away. The dog did a handbrake turn, screeching to change direction, and the pair of you laughed.  

“Smooth,” you said when he sat back down.  

Bresz simply kissed your forehead in response.  

That evening when you got to his after work, Bresz was in a bad mood. It was unusual to see your orc scowling, but you knew the moment you let yourself in that something was wrong. He turned and looked at you with such an expression of hopelessness that you thought something awful had happened. “What?” you asked, ditching your overnight bag and striding over to him. “What’s happened?”

“The oven’s bust,” he said. “I had everything planned out, and when I went to pre-heat it, it just sparked and went out. It’s not a fuse, and I think it’s dead.”

Your shoulders went slack with relief, and you started to laugh.

“It’s not funny!” he grumbled.  

“I’m not laughing at that, or you,” you said. “I just thought a person had died, not your oven!” you laughed. “You looked devastated.”

“I am devastated,” he countered. “I wanted to cook you something nice, and now we’re going to have to have omelet or something. Fuck.”

“We could go out?” you suggested. “There’s that nice place round the corner that you said you wanted to try.”

“Sure,” he said after a moment. “Ok. Let me get changed then. And don’t distract me this time,” he added, pointing a knuckly finger at you.  

You plastered an expression of pure innocence over your face. “I don’t know what you mean.”

One thick eyebrow sailed high, and he put his fists on his hips. “Oh, don’t you?” he smirked playfully. “I distinctly remember me having to ring up the restaurant last time because you got distracted and I ended up sporting the evidence of that distraction…”

“You couldn’t do your jeans up,” you smiled. “I remember. Well, I promise to behave and be a good girl.”

His pupils soared wide at that and he turned away. You thought you heard him curse in orcish and his breathing turned a little ragged as he stalked to his bedroom to change. Interesting. Power play was always something you’d found intoxicating, and half of the reason you’d been attracted to Bresz in the first place - before you’d started going out and learned what an absolute sweetheart he was - had been the size difference between the two of you. The other half had been his good looks and confidence. You’d have been lying if you’d not spent your (admittedly rare these days) nights alone thinking about him dominating you, using that power and strength he had to hold you up one handed by the wrists, teasing you with his other hand until you were a writhing, begging mess, and just… leaving you like that. You’d also entertained the idea of being spanked too, of mixing pleasure and pain together.  

You’d been standing there so long, thinking about his reaction to your simple promise to ‘behave and be a good girl’ that he had dressed and returned before you’d really registered it.  

“You alright?” he asked.  

You looked up at him, blinking. “You look amazing,” you said. “My big handsome orc. Come on, let’s go.”

He took you by the hand, his huge fingers engulfing yours in a gentle grip.  

Deciding to test the waters and explore your sneaking suspicions that he’d rather liked the idea of your being good for him, you accepted the menu from the waiter and then immediately handed it to Bresz without opening it.  

He frowned, curious, and had been about to ask what was going on when you interrupted him and said firmly but sweetly, “You know me well enough by now… Why don’t you choose for me?”

He swallowed thickly and then let out a rough exhale. “Sure. Alright,” he said, a gleam kindling in his rich, copper-brown eyes.  

He didn’t tell you what he’d chosen, and you didn’t find out until the waiter returned and asked if you were ready to order.  

“I think we are,” Bresz smiled. “I’ll have the surf n turf, and the lady will have the special.”

“Very good, sir,” your waiter nodded, and retreated.  

Bresz cocked an eyebrow at you. In silent answer you smiled, bowed your head, and sipped demurely at your water.  

Bresz reached out his hand across the table and took your small fingers in his. Your whole hand barely stretched across his palm, and you sank your teeth into your lower lip at the sight of it. “I love you,” Bresz rasped. “You know that, don’t you?”

“I think I’d be an idiot not to know that by now,” you reassured him.  

He kissed your knuckles, the set of his tusks so wide that they didn’t touch your hand at all, and he seemed to relax after that. It was almost as if he felt that he’d been too eager to take you up on your offer of handing control to him, and needed to apologise, or be reassured. You were only too happy to reassure him, and you also ran your foot gently up the inside of his calf beneath the table.  

“You,” he said, rolling his eyes, “Are trouble.”

“Good trouble?”

“Oh yes.”

The rest of your meal passed more normally after that, though he did take the opportunity to feed you some of his dessert from his spoon. His eyes glowed, reflecting the candle light like cats’ eyes at night, and he studied the way your lips moved around the curve of the spoon perhaps a little too closely. He insisted on paying, since he said it was his fault you’d had to eat out in the first place, and you let it slide this time.  

“Next one is on me though,” you said. “I do want to keep some independence you know.”

“Fair enough,” he said, sliding his hand around yours again as you walked home.  

Waiting for the lights to turn green at a pedestrian crossing, you tugged his arm and made him lean down to kiss you. You took his lower lip between your teeth and sucked hard enough to draw a deep, rumbling moan from him. “Are you trying to cause trouble?” he hissed.  

“Is it working?”

“Yes, you little minx,” he laughed. “Very much so.”

“Good.”

You made it to the hallway outside his front door before he cracked. He’d just started to look for his keys in his pocket when he found you already sneaking your hand in there. He paused, surprised, and looked down at you. He cursed again in orcish, and surged forwards towards you, pinning you against the wall with an exact and careful display of strength that made your knees turn weak. He grabbed your wrists and raised your arms, holding you in place while he crushed a kiss into your lips. “Fuck,” he snarled, feeling the way your body was responding. “Fuck, look at you…”

Your brain was spinning with just how perfect this was. You’d always enjoyed the way he took charge in the bedroom, but this had a new flavour to it, and you found yourself tipping into a gentle, buzzing part of your brain that you knew all too well as sub-space. Your knees turned to water and you felt your eyelids growing heavy, your lips parting, your chest heaving.  

He murmured your name, pulling back, and the moment his touch left your wrists, your arms fell limp to your sides and you let out a little whine. “We should get inside,” you managed to whisper.  

He nodded curtly, and as he turned to unlock his door, you saw the tent that he was sporting in his dark jeans. He looked almost fully hard already.  

Very interesting.  

You stepped inside as he held it open for you to enter first, and as he closed the door behind you, you turned.  

His apartment was large, open plan, with a kitchen just to the right beside the front door, and a large living area at the other end. Exposed brickwork, high ceilings, and big windows marked the building as a former warehouse, and he had divided the space up with tall bookshelves so that it didn't feel like an aircraft hangar inside. The effect was amazing, and the fact that he was a prolific reader was one of the things you had in common. You’d spent many an afternoon curled up on his battered old leather sofa together, your feet in his lap while he read. He would idly circle your ankle with his fingers and run his thumb over the arch of your foot while his eyes skimmed over the pages. Sometimes he would read passages aloud to you if he found something particularly worth sharing, and the whole thing lent an affectionate sense of domesticity to your relationship.  

Now, however, he stared at you with an impenetrable expression on his handsome face; part curious, part turned on, and part… something else that oscillated between hope and insecurity.

“So, er… that… back there…” he said. “That… That felt different… somehow…”

“Mmm,” you agreed. “I…” you shrugged and then said, “I like it when you’re rough with me.” He frowned. “I don’t mean that you hurt me, you don’t and you never have; it’s just… I like it when you use your strength carefully like that. A lot.”

He tilted his head slightly, his long braid swinging behind him like pendulum. His breathing was very shallow and you could see his pulse racing at the hollow of his throat.  

“What?” you asked.  

Bresz didn’t respond immediately. He turned away and braced his weight on his forearms, leaning on the kitchen table. “I… I’m always wary of bringing this up. It’s been misunderstood in the past, and… what with my being an orc… I mean, we’ve already got a reputation for being aggressive, brutish assholes… But…”  

You knew then what he was dying to say but couldn’t. You wondered if perhaps you should go first. Taking the plunge, you said quietly, “I’m sexually submissive. I think you probably figured that out already though. Look, I… I would be open to trying a few things if you’d like.”

From where he stood hunched over the counter, arms straight, back curved, his braid dangling down beside him, Bresz gave a great, shaking sigh. He rotated his head and glanced sideways at you with a soft smile. “Yes,” he said. “I’m not very good at admitting I have dominant tendencies. Especially because orcs get enough flack as it is. I… I didn’t want you to be afraid of me. I never want you to be afraid of me.”

You shook your head and stepped close to him, running your hands up his bare forearms to the sleeves of smart, plain white t-shirt he wore, and sliding your fingers over the bulging muscles of his biceps. You squeezed, though it was like squeezing a bronze statue, and he relaxed, straightening to his full height.  

“You’ve never given me even a hint of a reason to be afraid of you,” you said. “If you had, I would never have brought this up, and I wouldn’t be in a relationship with you. I trust you. I’d like to explore this new side of things.”

“Alright,” he said. “Let me get us both a drink, and we can talk about it.”

And you did. You talked late into the night about what each of you was prepared to do and to have done, what the rules were, what you thought you might need afterwards, and perhaps most importantly, you agreed on a colour system for during any play.  

It was Bresz’ idea. “Green, amber, and red,” he explained. “If I ask you for a colour, you have to give me one. Green means that you’re fine to keep going with whatever we’re doing. Amber means you need a break to think about it or to have a short breather, but you have to give me another colour soon after saying amber; either green or red. Red means we stop, no questions asked, no judgements, and the play ends. We do our aftercare, and we can talk about it later.” He paused and kissed you. “I can also call amber or red if I’m unsure or worried…”

You nodded, excitement fizzing in your lungs. “I can’t believe we’re going to do this,” you said. “You’ve given this some thought already, haven’t you?”

“We don’t have to do it,” he said quickly, eyes widening with worry. It was endearing how worried he was about dominating you and having you not like it.

“Shh,” you smiled, reaching for his cheek and asking him to move his drink out of his lap with a quick jut of your chin. He did, and once it was clear, you swung into his lap and straddled him. You stroked your fingers through the dark hair above his ears, and even though it was pulled back into his braid, you could still scrape your nails over his scalp enough to make him exhale and moan. “Let’s start slow and small. You said you like the idea of having me over your knee…”  

He grunted and you felt his cock twitch beneath you in answer.  

“And I very much like the idea of you using these big hands to make my skin all hot before massaging them and taking care of me. Why don’t we try that?”

“What, now?” he asked, his pulse leaping in his throat again.  

You rolled your hips and he groaned, setting his drink down on a nearby table and grabbing your hips, palms wandering over the curve of your ass as you sat there, working him up already. “Why not now?” you said. “Just a little test… If we decide we don’t enjoy it or it doesn’t work for us, then we can chalk it up to curiosity, and move on.” You very much hoped that wouldn’t happen. Already just the size of his hand on your hip was making you ache for the sting and heat of a spanking.  

He nodded slowly. “Alright. Alright,” he said more gently. He started to work his hands up your back in loving circles. “That it, my little girl,” he murmured. You’d told him what names you liked him to use, and hearing him use that one sent a jolt of heat straight between your legs. “My good little girl,” he crooned in your ear, his hot breath fanning over you. “If I agree to do this, will you promise to be good for me?”  

“I will,” you whispered.  

“Stand up,” he said, and you obediently slid off his lap and stood there while he sat, legs spread, hands resting on his thick, muscular thighs, staring up at you with pupils blown dark and wide. He cursed in orcish, and you shuddered. “You like it when I speak my mother tongue?” he asked, voice deepening slightly.  

You nodded silently, lower lip slightly between your teeth.  

“Well, well,” he chuckled. He said something which was clearly an order, but which you didn’t understand. You loved the way his tongue rolled behind his teeth when he spoke his own language. “You’ll have to earn a translation,” he added softly, and you whimpered.  

“What would you have me do?” you asked with just a little smile.

“Fetch me a glass of water.” It was not a request, but the order was gently given, as though he were testing out the sensation of demanding something from you. “You’ve made me thirsty.”

You nodded. “Yes, Sir,” you said, and he groaned again at his newly acquired title, eyes rolling. He liked that then.  

Returning, you presented him with the glass of water but he shook his head. He pointed at the floor between his parted knees. You smiled and knelt willingly before him, offering up the glass instead. “Much better,” he said, quite deliberately denying you the pleasure of being called a good girl. It seemed only fair; after all, you had not knelt immediately.  

He drank from it slowly, draining the glass. Bresz then handed it back to you and told you to put it on the table and return to your knees in front of him.  

You did. Each order, given with his softest, most gentle expression, sent pulsing heat to your clit and you were wet and breathing shallowly by the time you returned. This was finally everything you could ever have hoped for in a relationship with Bresz. It had been pretty perfect before, but knowing that he was willing to dominate you with consideration and playfulness was just…  

You didn’t have much time to think because he repeated his command in orcish, and then leaned one elbow on his knee, bringing his lips close to yours where you knelt between his legs, and said, “I told you to undress for me.”

Slowly you drew your top off over your head, revealing the (mercifully rather nice) underwear you’d selected that morning, but he grabbed your wrist as you made to continue undressing.  

“Wait.” The strength of his grip made you gasp. “Does that hurt?” he asked, concern flickering in his warm eyes.

You shook your head. “Almost.”

He paused and then carefully tightened his grip just a fraction. You watched his knuckles clench, his fingers close around your wrist, and you sagged sideways slightly with a mewl of pleasure.  

“Oh…” he crooned, drawing you easily up into the air to dangle by one arm, legs limp, “You are a dream. Just when I thought I couldn’t be any more turned on by you… you go and make a noise like that. Come here,” he said, and he simply draped you across his knees and drew the rest of your clothes off by himself.  

“Look at you,” he said again, circling the curve of your ass with his palm before squeezing hard enough to make you gasp and jerk slightly. “Easy,” he murmured. “Easy. I’ve got you, beautiful.”

He massaged you and stroked the backs of your thighs, letting his hands roam all over you until you were breathing deeply and revelling in the contact.  

“How do you feel?” he said. “Give me a colour.”

“Green,” you said immediately, and he laughed.  

And then he brought his fingers down hard over your ass cheek with a resonant ‘crack’. You gasped, more surprised than hurt, and he let it ring for a moment before rubbing a circle over it and caressing the place where heat and blood rushed in. Euphoria ripped through you a second later and you gripped his ankle, pressing your face down into his leg.  

“You took that so well,” he said softly, massaging gentle circles over your backside. “So well. Look at you. It’s all hot now too,” he smiled, running the pad of his thumb over the place where he’d spanked you. “You think you can do something for me?”  

“Mmhmm,” you nodded.  

“First, let’s get you relaxed again,” he purred, sliding his hand up your spine and back again. “Look how big my hands are compared to your little body,” he whispered in awe. “I feel like I’m going to break you all the time, but you’re so tough. You’re incredible. You’re beautiful. Look at you…” When you’d gone completely slack once more, he murmured, “Now then, my beautiful little one, you think you can count to five for me?”

You nodded.  

“I need you to say yes or no aloud,” he said firmly.  

The word left you as a moan. “Yes.”

“Good girl. Gods above, but you look so good like this,” he muttered, adding something under his breath in orcish. Then he bent right down over you and brought his tusks raking across your ass cheek. They dug in, but they were rounded and polished, smooth and sleek, and they slid over you, digging almost bruisingly deep without breaking the skin or truly hurting. He sucked a kiss onto your skin and played with your body a little more before beginning to make you count.  

“One… Two…” you said confidently as the first two strokes made contact in a slow, searing rhythm.  

“Good,” he said, and your ears buzzed at the praise.  

Strokes three and four came in rapid succession and left you winded and gasping. They stung, but the pain vanished into the rush and the heat afterwards.  

“Colour?” he prompted.  

“Amber,” you gasped, stilling for a moment. He stroked your skin with his leathery palms but otherwise remained silent. “Green,” you smiled, relaxing and waiting for the final spank.  

You practically yelled, “Five!” as the last one hit, but he immediately began to kiss you and croon praises against your skin.  

“Beautiful girl,” he purred. “You’re so beautiful. Well done, you took that so well. Look at you…” and he slid his fingers between your legs, seeking out your wet sex. When he found that you were dripping down your inner thighs, he growled and let one fingertip dance over your swollen clit, circling around your folds before withdrawing. You heard him moan and guessed that he was tasting you.  

“I want you,” he said quietly, returning his hand to you. You could feel how hard he was beneath you, and you knew you wanted nothing more than to have his cock buried inside you, filling you.  

“Please,” you whimpered. “Please…”

“I want to take care of you first,” he said. “Can I carry you?”

“Gods, yes,” you moaned, and he smiled and rolled you carefully over before scooping you up into his arms and standing. He nuzzled at your neck and your head lolled back over the crook of his huge arm to expose your throat. Orcs, like werewolves and a few other shifters, took an exposed throat as a sign of intimate trust, and the rush of his hoarse breath fanned across your skin mere moments before he mouthed kisses across your neck until you were whimpering, rubbing your thighs together, desperate for something more. This was far hotter than anything the two of you had ever done, and Bresz, you had discovered, was good in bed.  

He laid you down on his massive bed with its industrial scaffolding bed frame, and he turned you onto your front. “Here,” he said. “I’m going to get some lotion for you. I’ll be right back.”  

Bresz tested to see if it stung first, and when it didn’t, he worked his hands all over the heated areas of your cheeks until they were soothed and cool.  

He rolled you back over and took his time enjoying your body. You lay there, limp and gazing up at him with doe eyes. You wished he wasn’t wearing so many clothes, but somehow the pleasant buzzing in your head had smothered your ability to formulate such a complicated sentence. Luckily, he obliged anyway and was undressed in no time.  

He knelt over you, his thick cock hard, pre-come beading at the top again almost the instant that his underwear was off, and you found your fingers reaching for it, trailing up his thighs with weak, gentle strokes. He stared at you and his cock twitched and he cursed in orcish. That word you did know.  

“Please,” you said, parting your legs and sliding one hand down over your hips towards your centre. “I want you…”

He slipped his hands beneath your thighs and tugged you towards him, sinking his face to you and letting his tongue glide over your wet folds. He lavished attention on you, teasing circles and nudging your throbbing clit with the tip of his tongue until you thought you might just tear yourself apart with want.  

“Please!” you sobbed, tears rolling down from your eyes into your hair as you lay on your back. After the euphoria of being spanked and then cared for so gently, it was too much. He took you right to the edge and then backed away, repeating the process three times until you practically screamed.  

With a gentle, reassuring, and extremely playful smirk, he lined himself up, paused, and then sank hilt-deep into you in one stroke. His thick cock stretched you, his thumb swept a single upward motion over your clit, and his tip hit you so deep that you came around him with a sharp cry of pleasure.

He began to move while you were still coming. He murmured praises and told you how good you felt around him until it wasn’t long before he leaned forwards, one hand braced beside your head, and emptied himself into you with a series of deep, guttural grunts and groans. His strong muscles pressed his hips right up flush against yours, the heat of his release flooding you, as he gave himself completely to you.  

It was a long time before either of you could move, but eventually his cock softened and he rolled off you. Lying on his side, he stroked the backs of his fingers over your body. “You alright?” he asked in a raw, hoarse whisper.  

“Mmm,” you hummed happily, aching in all the right places. “I should clean up though.”

“I don’t think I’ve ever come that hard,” he said.  

“Nor me, and that’s saying something with you as my boyfriend,” you grinned back, still a little dazed yourself.  

He blushed sweetly at the praise, and you slipped away to clean up in his bathroom and brush your teeth before bed.  

You returned to find him dozing on his back, one arm flung across onto your side of the bed in an open invitation to snuggle up against him. You did, draping one leg over his thighs and tugging yourself as close to him as you could possibly get.

The next morning you woke and turned over, expecting to find Bresz snoring softly beside you, only to discover that the bed was empty and the sheets on his side were cold.

You sat up, surprised not to feel groggier than you did given your usual state in the mornings, but you relaxed a little when you heard sounds coming from the kitchen. It wasn’t all that unusual for him to get up before you, and he had been known to prepare breakfast for you at the weekend on more than one occasion.  

You glanced around the room and found that his t-shirt from the night before was still lying in a crumpled heap on the floor. You smiled and slipped it on, inhaling the scent of him for a moment before opening the door to his open-plan living and kitchen area.  

Looping your arms around his torso, you paused when you heard how rapidly his heart was beating, and pulled back. “Bresz?”  

“Mmm?” he asked, concentrating on spooning out his home-made granola onto a second bowl with some fruit. He didn’t look at you.

“Bresz, what’s wrong?���

“Nothing,” he said quickly.  

“Bresz,” you insisted, turning him around by the hips until he had to look at you. “Talk to me.”

He inhaled shakily and set down the spoon. “Are you alright?” he asked.

“I’m fine. I’ve never slept better than I did last night, and I’ve never felt better after sex than I do this morning…”

He took another unsteady breath. “Good. I… I was worried that maybe… maybe I’d gone too far. That maybe… I’d hurt you or…” He swallowed thickly. “I was suddenly terrified that when you woke up… you’d… you’d be afraid of me. I didn’t want to see that. So… I made breakfast.”

“Oh my big, sweet orc,” you smiled, kissing his solid chest. “Pick me up…”  

His hands found your waist and he hoisted you up so that you could latch your legs around his hips. You snaked your arms around his thick neck and pressed a kiss to his lips.  

“I love you,” you said. “Sounds like a bit of dom-drop talking there. You were perfect. You didn’t go too far, we talked about limitations beforehand, you always asked me for a colour if you weren’t sure, and you gave me the best aftercare any sub could ever want.”

“Good,” he sighed. “That’s good. I… The last thing I ever want to do is hurt you, I mean… for real, you know?”

“I know. You have a good heart, and that’s what will make you a good dom, I think, and an even better boyfriend. And look,” you said nodding over your shoulder at the fresh fruit and granola, “You’re still taking care of me.”

“I’ll always take care of you, whether we’re playing or not…” he growled, backing you towards an empty stretch of the counter and sitting you down on it. “You stay there a moment.”

“Yes… Sir,” you added cheekily.  

He chuckled and picked up a strawberry. For a moment you thought he was going to throw it at you, but instead Bresz fed you a few berries. Before you’d made any real kind of inroads into the cornucopia, however, he said, “I need you to promise me something though…”

“Ok…”

His warm brown eyes turned serious again. “If you decide you don’t want to do that again, I want you to promise me that you’ll say so. I don’t want you to do it just because you know I like it.”

You would have rolled your eyes if you weren’t sure that he was genuinely worried about putting you in a place you really didn't want to be. Instead, you grabbed hold of his shirt and tugged him a little closer. “Thank you,” you said. “But I categorically do want to do this again. As soon as possible.”

A small sound left his throat and he laughed quietly. “Well, I’m at your beck and call all weekend…”

“Surely it should be me serving you, Sir…?” you said, watching his eyelids flutter softly at your intonation.  

“Alright,” he said. “If that’s how you want to play it. How about this?” he asked, and proceeded to lay out his rules for the day.  

He began by demanding that you remove the clothing that you had purloined from him, and as punishment - since you had not asked permission to wear his shirt - you had to remain naked. You agreed to that. His apartment wasn’t overlooked by any other, being right on the river, and you felt comfortable enough walking around naked. You drew it off, and as you did he leaned down and took your nipple between his teeth, playfully tweaking it. He sucked a kiss over it, taking both your breasts in his hands and groaning softly as he kneaded them. Your back arched a little and he smiled and drew back.  

“Next,” he said, “I want you to go back to bed. I’m going to feed you the rest of your breakfast, and you’re going to eat it like a good little girl, and after that, you cannot walk anywhere in this apartment.”

“I have to stay in bed all day?” you asked, disappointed.  

He chuckled and shook his head. “No. But unless it’s a call of nature, I have to carry you wherever you want to go, but you have to earn it from me first. How does that sound?”

“I like that,” you said softly. “A lot.”

“Good,” he said. “Let’s see how you earn a change of scene after breakfast then. Go on,” and he practically shooed you off to the bedroom while he finished up preparing and altering his breakfast plans slightly.

He came in and found you lying naked on your back, ankles crossed, wrists crossed lightly above your head, and he stopped dead in the doorway. He looked like his brain had shorted.  

In orcish he said something, of which you were only able to make out the words ‘fuck’ and ‘beautiful’. Bresz rallied himself and knelt beside you. “Do you have any requests of me?” he asked softly.

“What if I get cold?” you said.  

“Then you can ask me for something to wear, but it’ll be something of mine, and it’ll be my choice. Ok?”

You nodded.  

“Words?”

“Yes, Sir.”

“Good girl,” he said, and he let his fingertips play briefly up your calf. You jerked at the sudden touch, and he smiled, looking at your face with a slight expression of wonder. “You’re already tipping back into sub-space, aren’t you?”  

He was right. You wouldn’t need much encouragement today. The warmth filled your head; that blissful vagueness of knowing he was there to take care of you, so long as you did all that he asked, and that he would never ask too much of you. You nodded and he set the bowl of fresh fruit down beside you and kissed your stomach and up between your breasts. “Let me take care of you then,” he said, his words echoing your thoughts. “I promise I’ll take care of you.”

He did.  

He fed you and kissed you, taking his time with you, arranging your body how he liked so that he could enjoy you and even taste you too. He used his mouth and brought you screamingly close to release before backing away again. “Not yet,” he said, leaving you whimpering. “I’ll be back in a moment,” he added, picking up the now-empty bowl and returning to the kitchen. “Don’t move, and do not touch yourself,” he said from the doorway.  

When he returned, he found you squirming slightly, but otherwise well behaved. Your reward for that was for him to take his shirt off, and then you were quickly told that you were not allowed to touch him unless you asked permission first. You whined a little at that, but agreed pretty quickly, and with that, he picked you up and carried you out into the living room.

He let you rest on the couch for a moment, taking a good long time to caress you and reassure you, making sure you were well and truly into sub-space, before announcing quietly that he had some work emails he needed to look over, and that he would like you to kneel beside him on the floor while he did that. “You don’t have to do anything, but just -” he ran his palm over his thigh for a moment and said, “Just be there, and don’t interrupt me unless you absolutely have to. Alright?”

You nodded.  

“I promise you’ll be rewarded though,” he smiled.  

“Yes, Sir.”

“Good girl.”

He fetched his laptop and proceeded to ignore you for a solid half hour. Well, he might have ignored you, but his cock told a different story as you laid your head against his thigh and basked in the gentle, swirling euphoria of being there with him like this. You’d often sat on this sofa with each other in companionable silence, but this was different entirely. While your presence felt needed, necessary almost, you also burned with the desire to touch him, to make him gasp and cry out and need your touch as much as you needed his.  

That, you realised, was the whole point of this exercise; to sit there and luxuriate in the quiet limbo he had created, settling into the new situation while the incentive to behave hung over you throughout the duration.  

By the time he finished on his laptop, he was hard, and you suspected that he hadn’t got all that much done. He closed the lid and set it aside, staring down at you with his eyes shining. “Well,” he said. “Didn’t you do well with that little test?”

You smiled, basking in his praise.

“Thank you, my beautiful little one,” he said. “Thank you for doing that for me. Now, would you like your reward?”

You nodded and tentatively reached a hand to his thigh. He bowed his head slightly, giving you permission to touch him, closing his eyes, and you repositioned yourself between his legs, unzipping his fly and drawing his jeans and underwear off his hips and down to the floor. His cock sprang free and you thumbed an arc across the sharp cuts into his muscle above his hips. He rumbled something softly, and you licked your lips and took the tip of his cock into your mouth. You tasted his pre-come on your tongue and moaned softly, making his balls clench slightly. He bucked upwards a little but caught himself in time before you choked.  

“Fuck,” he cursed, letting his head roll back into the sofa cushion behind him. “Fuck, that’s so good.”  

You let your tongue play briefly with the ridge around his head, licking at his slit, before taking him as deep as you could, wrapping your other hand around the remainder of his shaft. The long, deep groan of satisfaction he let out was reward enough for your good behaviour, but soon, as you got to work in earnest, his chest was heaving and his fingers were clenched in your hair. He tried so hard not to fuck your throat, but he couldn’t keep his hips completely still.  

You matched your rhythm to his, and soon he grunted that he was close. You let your fingertips tease his tightening balls, and he released into your mouth. You drank him down as he came with a bellow, breathing hard.  

He reached a shaky hand down and tilted your head up. Your eyes were watering, and a little of his release had escaped down your chin. “You look perfect,” he smiled, thumbing it away. “You did so well.”

That marked the mood for the rest of the day. Since it was your first time playing together like this, he kept it relatively simple. He did indulge - though whether it was for his benefit or yours, you weren’t sure and didn’t care - in another session of spanking. He had you half draped over his left knee and half over the sofa. You were already in sub-space, so again he didn’t linger too long on praising you first. That would come after.

Each time his fingers collided with your exposed backside, your knees wobbled and you felt a heady rush sweep through you. The pain was more like heat than discomfort, but it still stung gloriously. Your ass felt like it was glowing after just a few, but then the pain began to grow with each strike until you found yourself breathless and gasping. “Amber,” you said softly - so softly that he almost missed it.  

You felt the rush of air as his hand shot towards you again, but he pulled back at the last moment and stroked his fingers through your hair instead, curious and concerned. “You doing alright? Do you need a break?”

“I… I’m not sure…”  

“Ok. You were doing so well for me. Do you think you can take three more? Just three more, and I’ll let you stop…”

You whimpered, not quite sure if you could take three, but you nodded.  

“I need you to give me a green, and then I need you to count them,” he said, listening carefully to the timbre of your voice in your response.

“Green,” you croaked after another few seconds. “Green.”  

“That’s it,” he praised. “Well done. You’re being such good girl for me, you’re taking it so well.”  

The first wasn’t so bad, but the second and third hurt. Your skin was sensitive and hot, and the pain was just pushing through the pleasure enough that you weren’t sure you could handle anything else. You were hyper aware of all sensations, but it took you a while to notice that he was reaching to the coffee table in front of the sofa for the lotion already. As the cold liquid touched your skin you yelped, but he steadied you.  

“Easy,” he said. “I’ve got you. Let me take care of you. Let me take care of my beautiful, good little girl.”

You felt your arms waver and you sank down, face first, onto the cushion. Each slow circle of his thumb and palm over your searingly hot skin felt like ice on a burn, and he took his time with you. Bresz used both hands, working up and down your legs, reassuring you all the while. Pride soared in your chest that you had succeeded. He had known your limits and taken you to them, supporting you all the way.  

When he was satisfied that your skin was no longer aflame, he turned you gently over and rested you on your side with your head in his lap. He stroked your hair and gazed adoringly at you with glassy eyes. As you settled and calmed, he leaned forwards again and picked up a large glass of water. “Here,” he murmured. “Drink some of this.”

You hadn’t realised how thirsty you’d become, and you allowed him to hold your head and cradle you softly while you drank gratefully.  

Returning the nearly empty glass to him you hadn’t noticed that you had begun to shiver, and he frowned.  

“You’re cold,” he said, looking down the length of your body and finding goosebumps prickling your thighs and arms. “You should have said something…”

“I didn’t really notice,” you admitted. It felt so nice to be lying in his lap, feeling small and sheltered after the euphoria had settled down to a pleasant, all-pervasive hum.  

He frowned and carried you to the bedroom, setting you down on the bed. He pulled out a clean hoodie - one of his kick-boxing ones - and asked you to put it on. You snuggled into it and he cupped your cheek in his hand. “You look so tiny in that,” he said. “It’s just swallowed you up…”

The two of you cuddled together for a long time, just sitting on his bed, enjoying each other’s steady presence.  

By the end of the afternoon, you were beginning to resurface, and while you were honestly exhausted, it was the perfect kind of tired. Bresz seemed tired too, and you both wound down together, curled up on the sofa.  

“Do you want to put your own clothes on now?” he asked by way of signalling that he was ready to end it.  

“Maybe let me get some underwear and my pyjama trousers on…” you said.  

“I’ll get them for you. You stay there.”

When he came back, he too had a shirt on, and while you would always relish the opportunity to stare at his naked body, it felt right that you should both get changed.  

“Are you alight?” he asked when you’d got a few more clothes on besides the hoodie. “Do you need anything?”

“Just a cuddle,” you said, and he tugged you gently into his lap. “And maybe some food? You?”

“Mmm, a cuddle,” he smiled back, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. “And I’ll order some pizza. I think we earned it, don’t you?”

You nodded.

He turned the TV on and ordered. When the food arrived, he didn’t feed you, and you both enjoyed the quiet closeness. You were ravenous, and ate much more than you would normally have done. When you said as much, he laughed. “You worked really hard for me today,” he said. “And maybe I don’t want to do this all the time, but… I have to say this has been one of the best weekends I’ve ever had with you.”

“Mmm, I had fun too. I think I actually needed that.”  

The light of the TV flickered, but you ignored whatever was on and let yourself be lulled into a warm, cosy, full-bellied sleep. You didn’t remember being carried to bed or tucked in, but you stirred in the middle of the night to find Bresz wrapped tightly around your body, like a protective outer shell.  

His breathing was deep, even, and steady, and his arm was curled around your waist. He shifted slightly and, impossibly, pulled you even closer to him, mumbling something soft in orcish. You would have to ask him what that particular word meant in the morning. At that moment, you knew you had never been more comfortable in your whole life, and with that thought, you drifted back to a dreamless sleep. 

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I really hope you enjoyed it! If you did, don’t forget to leave a like on it, and reblogs are always welcome.

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[cynicalkairos]

That Stupid Borat Voice

Summary: The office finds out Ted is not only dating someone but married and Paul is determined to find out who is the mystery man.

Warnings: Mentions of alcohol, language

Word Count: 1851

A/N: Enjoy this little thing I wrote a while ago. I found this and never posted it.

Nothing new ever happened at the office.

Paul lost his paper that he printed to one of the many printers. Charlotte tried to hide her unintentional smoking and drinking habits from everyone with no avail. Melissa ran around, asking every member of the staff if they wanted to join the company softball team, only to be rejected every time. 

Despite the amount of time that they bickered, anyone could find Bill and Ted ranting and complaining to each other, primarily because it was understood between the two that both were willing to listen. Bill was always trying to be helpful or very stressed about a certain subject. Ted was a nosy piece of shit or just wanting someone to talk to about a certain subject.

Usually, that subject for Bill was his daughter, Alice, but Bill could never figure out the identity of the person that Ted was going on about. 

“So, like, ya know how some people are just naturally perfect?” Ted said immediately when he sat down at the table with Bill.

“Yeah.”

“Well, I can tell ya one thing that is not.”

“What’s that, Ted?” Bill replied flatly, barely awake from his coffee.

“My husband,” he said with that terrible Borat impression. “I mean, like, he is perfect, but—”

Bill nearly choked on his coffee, sprinting over to the sink to spit it out before it went everywhere. He took a couple deep breathes. “What?”

“Dude, are you okay?”

“I’m fine, but are you?”

“Of course! What the fuck are you goin’ on about?”

Bill gaped at him and then sputtered out, “You’re married!”

“Yep,” Ted said curtly, showing off the thin, gold band on his left ring finger.

And, sure enough, the ring on his left hand was definitely a wedding ring.

Once the news spread around, everyone sped into the break room to hear the tale and ask questions. Ted would answer all of them, loving the ability to talk about his husband to the entire world.

“Is he handsome?”

“Fuck yeah.”

“How long have you been together?”

“Over a year.”

“Is he good in bed?”

“Oh, ho ho,” Ted said, taking a sip of his coffee. “You have no idea.”

“How long ago was it?” Charlotte asked.

“Was what?”

“The wedding.”

“Oh, about a couple weeks ago, I guess. It seems like forever ago.”

“Do you love him?”

“What kind of stupid fucking question is that, Bill? Of course, I do! Next!”

Then Paul asked, “Well, who’s the… lucky man then?”

Ted simply shook his head and chuckled, saying in that stupid Borat voice, “My husband.”

Because of that answer, Paul never gave up.

Paul would ask him at any time and any place, trying to find out who this mystery man was. 

In the bathroom. In the morning before Ted had his coffee. The middle of the night over the phone. Through memos. By any and all ways that he could.

Every single time, Ted said in that stupid Borat voice, “My husband.”

The rest of the office mostly found Paul’s attempts at discovering Ted’s husband amusing, including Ted. It became a running joke on their floor. If someone asked for someone’s name, the other would use the Borat voice to respond. 

Paul, on the other hand, was frustrated.

He found Ted in the break room, making his coffee peacefully, and pulled him to the side. Ted jumped from the sudden movement, almost spilling his coffee everywhere. “Paul! You almost made me spill my fucking coffee!”

“Doesn’t matter. Who’s your husband?”

“I’ve already told you! My—”

“‘Husband.’ Yes, we know. But, who is he? Why can’t you tell us?”

Ted scoffed and drank a portion of the coffee. “Why the fuck do you care?”

“I just—”

“You don’t believe that I am actually married, don’t ya?”

Paul sighed and nodded. “Yeah, like— how can someone like you find someone— and I mean anyone?”

Ted looked away from Paul and smiled fondly, the thoughts of his husband filling his mind. “I don’t know, Paul. I really don’t have a clue.”

Ted walked off with his coffee, leaving Paul standing here. He was surprised, to say the least. It was definitely weird. He didn’t expect the… the sentiment behind his words. Fuck, he was wrong, wasn’t he? Ted was definitely in love.

————

Soon, Christmas rolled around a few months later and Ted never gave up his husband’s identity.

With some reluctance, Paul stopped asking him about it… as frequently.

“Are you ever going to tell everyone?” Paul asked, rolling over to Ted’s cubicle one afternoon.

“I’ll have to. He’s coming to the Christmas party,” Ted replied, never looking up from his computer. 

Paul’s jaw dropped. “Wait. What?”

Ted turned around and nodded. “Yeah, he wanted to come to meet everyone.”

“Then why didn’t he come to any of the other parties?”

“He’s a professor. They always happened when he had a lot of work or a thing at school.”

“You married a professor?!”

Ted frowned. “Yeah?”

“I can’t believe you tricked someone smart to marry you.”

“Hey!” Ted interjected. “There’s nothing shitty about him… except his cooking. Can’t cook for shit.”

“Okay, but he’s coming, right?”

“Yeah, definitely. We’ll be there.”

———

It was the night of the party and the office was packed with people, food, and booze.

Paul and Emma were talking with Bill and Charlotte when Ted walked in, going right over to them with a drink already in his hand. “Which one of you fuckers are ready to party?”

Paul smiled curtly and raised his glass to him, acknowledging his presence. “Where’s your husband?”

“He’s coming. The parking was shit, so he dropped me off.”

Bill gave Ted the side-eye and looked at Charlotte with a chuckle, handing her ten bucks. Ted looked at them incredulously, before continuing, “What the fuck was that for?”

Charlotte giggled, clearly a little tipsy. “We made a bet. I said that you would give some excuse as to why he wouldn’t show up and Bill said otherwise. I won.”

Emma smiled. “I was about to bet, but I didn’t want to lose my money.”

“I just didn’t want to,” Paul said.

“Well, don’t worry, Bill. You should be getting you money back real—”

“Ted! There you are,” a voice from behind them called out. “I leave you for five minutes and you’ve already started drinking without me.”

The group turned around to see none other than—

“Professor?” Emma asked, completely shocked. She definitely didn’t expect to see her biology teacher standing behind them.

“Emma! Good to see you again,” Henry replied, before moving over to Ted and kissing him on the cheek. “Hello, sweetheart.”

“Hey, babe.”

Ted gave Henry his drink and wrapped his arm around Henry’s waist, while Henry’s hand slipped into Ted’s back pocket. “Guys, this is—”

Henry sighed and rolled his eyes fondly. “Ted, don’t you dare do it.”

“My husband, Henry,” Ted continued in that stupid Borat voice, despite the complaints from his husband. 

They were met with silence from the rest of the group. Emma was still shocked that her reclusive professor was married to the office asshole. Paul couldn’t believe that he was actually real. Bill and Charlotte just exchanged glances and then the money that Bill had rightfully won.

Emma stepped forward and downed the rest of her drink. “Oh, god, no.”

“I’m afraid it’s true, Emma,” the professor said, only then looking away from Ted.

“That’s the man you’re married to?”

“Uh— yes?” He really didn’t know how to answer that question.

“How?”

“Well, I proposed to him and we eloped… after we consumed a lot of alcohol.”

“Yeah, it was really a blur, but I don’t fucking regret it,” Ted interjected.

“Well—” Henry started before Ted cut him off with a quick scoff. “I’m only joking, my dear. I don’t either. We’re having an official wedding ceremony later, though.”

Ted nodded and they looked at each other, giving each other a small but loving smile. 

Charlotte smiled and clapped her hands, unintentionally getting their attention. “How do you two meet?”

They glanced at each other and then Henry spoke first. “Emma asked me to deliver something to Paul after he forgot a coffee at Beanie’s. It was on the way to work, so I agreed. I gave it to him and— well, met Ted. I hated him at first. I thought he was a complete douchebag.”

“Me too. I thought he was a pretentious prick,” Ted chimed in.

“You’re so sweet, dear.” Henry chuckled, before continuing, ”The same thing happened a few days later, so I brought the coffee over here again, but it was about the end of Ted’s shift. We parked near each other and began talking some more. I started to hate him less—”

“‘Less?”” Ted interrupted.

“At least, I only thought you were an asshole by that point.”

“Thank the lord.”

Henry rolled his eyes again and shook his head. “Then we ran into each other at Beanie’s about a week later and we talked for a long time— Don’t look too surprised, Emma. It wasn’t on your shift.— We had a lot in common and didn’t hate each other anymore. Then he eventually asked me out and the rest is history.”

Charlotte and Bill gave them a small “Aww!” while Paul looked confused and Emma looked happy. 

“Well, I’m glad it worked out for you, Professor,” Emma said. “It’s good to see you happy.”

“Thank you, Emma.”

Emma then turned to Ted, sizing him up despite her height and poking him in the chest. “If you ever hurt him, then I will kick your ass until you’re pulp. Got me?”

Ted laughed and winked at her. “Believe me, that won’t be necessary, fun-size.”

Then Ted dragged him off to get more alcohol and food abruptly by his hand, leaving a fumbling Henry to wave goodbye to the rest of the group.

Paul stared at them and said a very audible, “What the fuck?”

———

The night was coming to an end when Paul was the only one of them left. Mostly everyone had left, including Emma, Bill, and Charlotte, but a few people that he didn’t really know and Melissa, who was still trying to get people to join the softball team. 

As he was leaving, he saw Henry and Ted talking quietly near the large wall of windows. For the time that he knew Ted, he never saw him so happy. He watched as Henry noticed the mistletoe hanging above them and pointed at it. Ted, who was turned around for a moment to place his drink down, looked back at it, as Henry took his hand and twirled him around, dipping him with a grace that Ted could never have achieved. 

Paul smiled and exited the door when Henry pressed a gentle kiss onto Ted’s lips, leaving the pair to their privacy.

Even from that distance away did Paul hear Henry say, “Did you really use that stupid Borat voice for four months, instead of just telling them?”

“You bet your beautiful ass I did,” Ted said in response. 

#tedgens #short fic #ted tgwdlm #ted richards #henry hidgens #professor hidgens #professor hidgens x ted #tgwdlm #melissa tgwdlm #bill tgwdlm #charlotte tgwdlm #paul matthews #emma perkins

[of-fishnets-and-black-lace]

True Love is a Lie pt. II

Request: Can I please have a part two to “True Love is a Lie”? The first one was so good! Can I have it where it’s been a couple of months and you’re dating Sam and Lucifer comes and asks you to take a walk through the woods while Sam and Dean follow behind, just in case, and you tell him that you’re pregnant with Sam’s child and can you name the child Diana from Wonder Woman and also include the young Diana Prince?

Read Part 1 here!

Word Count: 1892

Warnings: Angst, pregnancy, fluff, cursing, terrible writing, idk what else since it has been too long since I’ve read this, the format got messed up when i posted this from my google docs

Pairing: Sam Winchester x Reader, Past Lucifer x Reader

A/N: I’m baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack. Shit has been so crazy the past few months/years but I’ve got my mojo back! It has been so long since I’ve done anything but I am hoping that with this pandemic I can finally post and write all the requests I have been getting, sequels to my other stories, as well as new stuff I’ve been working on. I am still not taking any requests until I have finished those in my inbox. I love you all and I am so happy to be writing again!

A year went by since your last heartwrenching encounter with Lucifer.  You nearly forgot about it because of your new life with Sam.  Sam always made sure to be attentive and by your side at a moment’s notice.  He made you trust in people again after your confrontation with Lucifer.  He knew after that experience you’d be broken, so he made sure to be there to mend the pieces.   

You did not want to dwell in the past and think yourself into a  depressive mood, especially with the Winchester boys and your new best friend, Jack, gone on a hunt.  You would’ve went with them had you not felt so nauseous and tired.  It was a typical salt-n-burn so you weren’t exactly missing out on anything important.  Nevertheless, Sam hated leaving you, especially with Lucifer still out there, but you were safe. 

Just as the thought of the moose enters your mind, your phone buzzes.

Sam: Hey baby girl, we’re on our way back.  Need anything?

You: Just some warm cuddles from my moose. 

You: Actually, I need oranges like right now. Not joking, I feel like I’ll die without oranges.

Sam: Is everything ok? You’ve never asked for oranges and I’ve never even seen you eat oranges since I’ve known you.

You: Yeah I’m fine, just a bit nauseous.  Also I’ve just been having a weird craving for oranges for some reason.  Oh well.

Sam: Hmm, I’m no doctor but maybe you should get checked out.  I worry about you, honey.

You: I know sweetie, but the doctor is expensive. It’s probably just the stomach flu or something.  Btw, how much longer?

Sam: Probably an hour, give or take 15 minutes.

You: Ok, Love you! See you soon!

Sam: Love you too! Can’t wait!

“Ok, so I have about an hour or so to check and see if my suspicions are correct.” You say aloud to yourself.

“What suspicions?” Cas suddenly appears out of nowhere, scaring you half to death.

“What the hell Cas?!” You all but screamed.

“Sorry, I thought you were praying to me.” Cas was never any good at lying to you.

“Umm, no I wasn’t just tell me why are you here?”

“I heard something on angel radio, and I needed to know if it is true.” He places a hand on your stomach.  “So it is true.”

“What? What is wrong with me?”

“(Y/N), your suspicions are right.  You’re six weeks pregnant.”

“How is that possible? Sam and I were so careful! What will he think or say? No, I can’t tell him. Not yet.”

With Sam and Dean still not home, you made Cas get a pregnancy test.  You trusted the angel’s words, but you needed concrete evidence.  You made Cas leave for a few days; you knew for sure that Cas wouldn’t be able to keep the secret.  The plus sign emerged with seconds to spare as Sam’s heavy footsteps could be heard approaching your shared room.

“(Y/N) I’m home!” Sam yelled as he collapsed onto the bed. You run out from the bathroom, pounce on him, and kiss all over his face.

“I missed you, Moose.”

“I missed you too, sweetheart.  I got the oranges you asked for.” 

“Thank you, baby…” You said as you chewed on the inside of your cheek.

“What’s wrong, baby girl?”

“Sam, have you ever thought about having kids?”

“Well yeah of course but… Isn’t it a little dangerous given our profession?”

“Yeah that’s true, but we’ve got out once, we can do it again.  Besides, I know I am safe when I’m with you and when I’m here in the bunker.”

“Enough with the chit chat, we have company.” Dean interrupts 

You and Sam follow Dean to the lighted table, sitting there was God himself, dressed oh so casually and a look of nervousness graced his face.  He twiddled his thumbs and a small smile made its way to his features as his eyes locked with yours.  

“Uh hehe, hey (Y/N), Sam, Dean, Jack.”

“What’s up, Chuck?” You said, holding onto Sam.

“Um, Lucifer asked me to tell you that he’s outside and would like to speak with you.” You grabbed onto Sam a little tighter.  

“I’ll talk to him, but I want Sam and Dean to stay close to me.  Jack should stay behind since it’s his father.”  

“He knows, he said that they could.”

You make your way outside and there he is, dressed in a nice suit and tie with a bouquet of (f/c) (f/f) in his right hand, but one thing was different: you couldn’t see his wings.  Your heart felt like it was going to beat out of your chest, but Sam gave a reassuring squeeze to your hand.  You began walking toward Lucifer, Sam and Dean close behind.  Lucifer handed you the bouquet of flowers and gave a quick peck to your knuckles.  This apparently didn’t sit well with Sam as he cleared his throat with anger. 

“Will you join me for a walk through the woods, (Y/N)?” Lucifer asked and you look to Sam and Dean. “Don’t worry, they can follow behind.”  

You all walk to the edge of the woods in silence, your heart beat faster with every step closer to the treeline.  Through your peripheral vision, you could see Sam clench and unclench his jaw.  He was just as nervous as you were, if not more so.  You and Lucifer finally enter the woods. Sam and Dean follow a minute behind to give you some form of privacy, while still able to barely make out your conversations.  

“First of all, I want to say I’m so sorry for what I did to you.  I should have asked for your permission and talked it through with you.” Lucifer says, breaking the silence.  

“It’s alright I guess. I did some research and I now understand that I would not have survived through labour.  However, that does not justify your actions, what you did really hurt me.”

“I know, and I’m so sorry.  I never meant to hurt my soulmate.”

“Soulmate?”

“Yes, you were my soulmate.  That’s why you were able to see my wings.”

“Then why can’t I see them now?”

“Well, that’s what I wanted to talk about.”  There was a pained expression on his face, you’ve never seen the devil quite like this before.  “I had God make Sam your soulmate after what I had done to you.”

“This isn’t like you Lucifer, why would you do this?”

“I have to prove to you that I will always love you and do what’s best for you, even if it meant letting you go.” He sighed and placed a hand on your stomach. You could hear Dean hold Sam back as he spewed threats if Lucifer were to harm you.  

“Hurt the baby and I will not hesitate to pluck every feather from your wings.”

“I swear on my Father that I will protect yours and Sam’s child. It’s the least I could do to make up for everything.” He said as he kisses your forehead. “Name her Diana.” With that he disappears.

Sam finally breaks away from his brother and runs straight to you. He sees you place a hand protectively over your stomach and smile to it.The words of Lucifer finally make sense to him as he asks “You’re pregnant?”

You shake your head and smile, afraid to say anything.

“I am going to be a father!” Sam shouted with excitement as he picks you up and spins you around.  Tears of joy threaten to spill from both you and Sam as you lock eyes.  As he goes in for a kiss, you both are interrupted by Dean, yelling incoherently and excitedly about him being an uncle. You and Sam look at each other and giggle. It’s not a perfect family, but you can’t live without them.

Time Skip to Wedding Day (3 years later)

You look at your engagement ring then to your flower girl, Diana Prince Winchester, waddling down the aisle leaving flower petals in her wake.  She looked so adorable in her little white dress and you couldn’t help but to tear up.  The audience gasp and awe as they watch your daughter.

The wedding was surprisingly large for a pair of hunters.  Hordes of hunters (friends and some you’ve never seen before), the Winchesters’ monster “friends”, a few angels, and some family came from all over to see you two get married.  With God sponsoring your wedding, you expected something extravagant like a wedding at the Vatican. However, this was not the case.  The ceremony was held in a beautiful meadow that somehow matched your (f/c) wedding theme. The icing on top of the cake was Chuck himself officiating the wedding.  

The wedding march began and Gabriel walks you down the aisle.  Sam couldn't help but let a few tears slip as he watches his two beautiful girls in white.  Dean, the best man, elbows him slightly but he too couldn't help the tears.  Cas, Lucifer, and Jack all smile at you and then to Sam.  They know you two are perfect for each other.  You weren't phased by Sam asking Lucifer to be a groomsman. Besides, it was your idea to have him as Diana's godfather.  You finally reach the altar, and neither of you seem to care about the sniffling and hiccuping. You were finally marrying each other so let the waterworks happen. 

You were hardly paying attention until you hear Chuck say it's time to share your vows.  Sam clears his throat and begins: 

“Y/N, I've known you for as long as I can remember.  We've been fighting side by side since we were little and our dads would go on hunting trips together.  I would always tell myself, that one way or another I will marry this girl and protect her from any and every monsters.  You may have not been my soulmate then, but you are my soulmate now. And as your soulmate, I'm never letting you go.” There was a slight pause and an awkward cough from Lucifer. “I will love you until the end of time.” 

He slips the ring on your finger as you begin:  “I’d never thought I would be standing here with the infamous Sam Winchester, yet here I am with a ring on my finger.  You were my first best friend and my first crush and my first protector.  you’ve saved me from being broken in more ways than one, and for that I owe you my life.  While it is true we were not soulmates before, we are soulmates now and that’s all that matters.  I will love you forever until the end of time.” 

After the expression of the “I Dos,” you hear the words you’ve been dying to hear since you made it to the altar: “You may kiss the bride.” Sam grabs you by the waste and pulls you to him.  With the passion of a thousand suns, he kisses you and everything melts away.  It was just like the first time you two kissed.  

In the back of your mind, you could hear Lucifer whisper “I will always love you” but that didn’t matter to you anymore. You are Sam’s and he is yours.  Nothing will change that.

#mark pellegrino #supernatural #SPN #lucifer #lucifer x you #lucifer fluff #lucifer angst #supernatural x reader #supernatural oneshot #supernatural fluff #supernatural imagine #spn oneshot #spn fluff #spn imagine #spn x reader #lucifer fanfiction #lucifer imagine #lucifer smut #fluff #angst #sam winchester #mark pellegrino x you #supernatural fic #jared padalecki #jared padelecki x you

[etlunainmorte]

***

V left.

No, he didn't leave you like that, no.

It's just that, he and the other Devil Hunters had business to attend to. An old score to settle, just like what Nero said. Something that was related to someone named Mundus. Well, you didn't know the person ( or if he's a person, at all ) but, V said he’s dangerous. Of course, you wanted to beg him to let you come but, you knew he would never allow it. Heck, the Devil Hunters didn't even allow Nico to come. Lady was one thing but, you being powerless as of that moment? V simply refused.

So, with a promise that he'll keep you posted with everything that will happen to them, he went away with Dante, Nero, Trish, Lady, Griffon and Shadow. He also left Andromeda with you so you could have a source of power should things get awry on your side. Also to keep you vitalized while he's gone.

And just like that, V left.

And that was six years ago.

For at least a year and a half, V never failed to send you letters and postcards, telling you of those wonderful places he visited with the rest of the group in search of this Mundus. Places that he would visit again but, with you by his side. He told you, in these letters and postcards, how much he missed you, how much he longed to be by your side, to hold you in his arms and kiss you and make you his over and over again. He told you how much he loved you and you alone, above all else. You cherished these hand - written notes from the man you loved and kept them close. You prayed for the safety of their group, and for their safe return.

But, just like that, he stopped sending letters and postcards nearly five years ago, which has made all of you, including Nico ( who lost contact with them about the same time V stopped writing ), and Kyrie ( who has to take care of her and Nero's precious five year - old daughter and manage the orphanage all by herself ) awfully worried.

You tried sending Andromeda over and over again to see if they were doing fine but, the entity refused, telling you that it is her sworn duty to protect you and never leave your side. Nico tried many times to contact the team but, every single time she managed to hit a stable connection, something strange and unexplainable would interrupt, leaving her listening to just static. Kyrie helped you send letters to the addresses where V sent his, hoping that he would, by any chance, receive them.

But, to no avail.

Still, you didn't lose hope. You distracted yourself during the day, and you fervently prayed each night. You kept the smile on your face, and kept the hope alive in your heart.

Hoping that someday, he, and the rest of the group, would return, safe and sound.

Maybe it was that hope and inspiration that made you do simple but, life - changing things, which, somehow, made an impact and directly influenced your closest friends.

You may have lost the ability to dance but, still, it didn't stop you from establishing your very own little ballet school for beginners next to a church in Fortuna where you lived. Even the kind and gentle Sister Christina flew all the way from Germany to lend her support as an overseeing headmistress while you do the ballet instructing, yourself. You even have Nero and Kyrie's girl, Eva, as one of your little protégés ( who were mostly from poor families of Fortuna whose homes were destroyed by the Dreadnought six years ago ). You even got the surprise of your life, when, one day, the man who made Galatea showed up in the school's doorstep and revealed that he was, in fact, your parents' grandson. Through him, you found out that your precious parents didn't die, after all, after the Pale Ones abducted you and your sister. They were powerless against the cult, and they weren't able to do anything when the news of the Fortuna Castle's fire reached them. They thought you were dead, and has since moved on and had another child. He also revealed that they never forgot about you and your sister until death, and the old photograph they have of you was the thing that inspired him to make Galatea.

Cagliostro, who was, surprisingly, engaged to none other than Alicia, who has fully grown into a beautiful and mature woman, helped with the interior decorating. He has finally moved on from his heartbreak and found a new purpose in life - to be a much better artist and build a family of his own with his Hispanic fiancée.

Alicia, on the other hand, has figured out that her mother's strange behavior before her death was due to an unknown mental illness caused by a past trauma, and has since then dedicated the early years of her life as a licensed doctor to help people with the same case and helped a larger, more prominent medical team to develop a cure for this. 

Petya ( who was balding and happy ) and Natasha ( who still preferred being called Solagne ) never failed to drop by almost every month, bringing both French and Russian beverages with them, just to have little parties with you and the rest of your little group of loving friends. You even saw the haughty woman teaching music to your students during your break ( you only kept this to yourself but, you knew that the poor woman, who, according to Petya, was unfortunately unable to conceive, was longing for a cute little girl of her own ).

Nico, who still kept her lines open just in case one of the Devil Hunters called, improved a lot as an Artisan during those six years of her friend and partner, Nero's absence. Of course, just like you and Kyrie, she never lost hope that they would return someday, and since then, she has developed more powerful and much more revolutionary weapons for Nero to use. Guns, Devil Breakers, and even other, weird - looking gadgets that she called works of art. You even told her that she has surpassed her grandmother, Nell Goldstein, and more but, the woman wouldn't admit this. Said that she must first let Nero test all of her creations and let him admit that to her straight in the face.

Kyrie, just like you, remained ever vigilant. In fact, now that her daughter's growing up, she wanted nothing more than to have Nero finally meet his little girl. She helped you with the ballet school whenever she has time off the orphanage she and her husband built. She even cooked sumptuous meals for you and your little prima ballerina wannabes. And when the busy days were finally over, she, who you built a strong, friendly relationship with over those six years, would always go with you to the nearby church to pray for the return of your beloved ones.

A lot has happened during those years, things that helped you grow as a person.

And on the sixth year during the anniversary of the day you and V got together after so many trials and hardships, you decided to leave Fortuna for a bit to visit Red Grave, where Dante and V's house once stood.

After the Qliphoth incident that almost took the lives of hundreds of Red Grave's innocent citizens, the ruins of Sparda's residence has turned into a secret garden of some sort. For some reason, briars climbed on the broken walls and pillars, filling the whole place with vines, thorns, and roses. Yes. Roses of all kinds and colors. The mansion has turned into the largest rose garden you have ever seen.

You marveled at the sight and settled down, placing your bag on an old bench and sitting next to it. And as soon as your eyes landed on the beautiful sunset, you couldn't help but feel miserable. You and V loved watching the sunset from this very bench, and he has even told you that this has become his most favorite place in the world, now that this old house has turned into a massive garden of wild and fragrant roses.

And the moment you thought of V, you couldn't help but cry silent tears of longing.

Yes, you refused to let them see your weak side but, it didn't stop you from crying each night, from having dreams of him and you being together,...

... of you finally being lovingly held in his arms,...

"Where are you, V?" You miserably wept as your arms automatically went up to wipe your tears with the sleeves of your pink hoodie. "I missed you, so, so, so much,..."

You stayed there for what seemed like hours until you felt you could no longer cry, and when the moon has risen high above the starry sky, just like that one evening when you danced your first ever waltz with him, you decided to stand and retire for the day. Just then, some nagging thoughts plagued your mind,...

Did they fail in their mission to bring down Mundus? What if they, he, never return? What would happen now? What - ?

All of a sudden, you felt the temperature drop. Your hands went up to rub your arms due to the sudden cold that sent shivers up and down your back.

The wind blew, making the clouds roll by, concealing the moon and plunging the whole place in darkness.

That was when you saw,... something,... from a distance. At first, you thought your eyes were deceiving you but, alas, you were wrong.

If anything, they even widened at the sight that greeted you.

An unearthly slash in mid air, the blue and purple light radiating from it as if the atmosphere, itself, was ripped, and some people emerging from it.

"Why did you bring us here?" A familiar voice, which made you emotional all over again, questioned, his voice ringing in the air and disturbing everything within his immediate vicinity.

"Because V told me so!" Another answered.

"Whatever! I'll just go back to the shop and order pizza. Wanna come with me, ladies?"

"You're inviting us, Dante? Are you serious?!"

"Hey, what's wrong with that, huh, Lady?"

"Nothing. Except that your shop probably has six years worth of dust now. No, thanks!"

"How about you, Trish?"

"No, thanks. I want to go back to my own house and have a long bath."

"Eh, whatever. I'm not sharing!"

"Hey, look!"

Your eyesight almost became blurry with tears as the group finally noticed you standing from a distance. From there, you saw Dante ( who, easy to say, has become scruffier than ever before ), Nero ( who now looked a bit more like Dante due to his beard and shoulder - length hair ), Lady ( whose looks somehow stayed the same ), Trish ( who, just like the former, seemed to not have changed, at all ), Griffon ( still bald, and still lanky ), and Shadow ( now the same height as Lady and Trish and no longer a little girl but, a gorgeous young woman ).

But, what made you truly emotional was the figure standing behind them, slightly concealed.

Shoulder length snow white hair now long and waist length, emerald eyes that looked more gentle than ever before with little creases below them, that all - too familiar posture as he leaned on his metal cane, and that smile you missed so much,...

"Hey, uh, send my regards to Kyrie and Nico, will ya?" Dante told Nero as he nudged his nephew with an elbow. He, then, waved and winked at you as he gestured towards the silent man behind him.

"Let's go home." Lady said as she smiled at you.

"I'm with you." Trish replied as she waved at you, finally leaving the place together with Lady and Dante.

"Let's go back to Fortuna, you two." Nero told Griffon and Shadow. "I could sense Kyrie making apple pie right now."

"Talk to ya later, sweet pea!" Griffon yelled and waved at you as he went with Nero and Shadow back to the portal the Yamato has just made.

Which left only the two of you.

You had no idea what went on between the two of you during those awkward and agonizing moments or how long it took for you to finally go to him. You didn't even notice the clouds as they rolled away to let the moon shine down once more. And when he finally wrapped you in an embrace you longed so much for so long, you couldn't help but soak his white shirt with tears.

"Ssh, it's alright." He whispered to your ear as his hands rubbed your back to warm you. "I'm here now. I'm here."

"W - welcome back, V!" You greeted through your sobs, making the poet chuckle in amusement. "I have waited for so long! I never lost hope that you would return, but just now, I thought that - "

"It's alright, my love. Everything would be fine now. Our hunt for Mundus has brought us all to the Underworld. And he is gone. Finally gone. At last, we can finally live in peace."

You looked up at him and let him wipe your tears away with his thumbs. "Is that why we can't reach you? You went to the Underworld?"

"Yes. And I'm afraid to say that,... time works differently there from here. We've only been there for six days but,... when we resurfaced, it seems that,... six years,... has already passed."

"Are you okay? Were you hurt? Tell me, please! I will take care of you,..."

"There's no need. I will be the one who will take care of you. And I'm sorry,... for disappearing for too long,..."

"You don't have to say sorry. You fought bravely for us. Oh, dear God, I missed you so much! I missed you, so, so much!"

"And I missed you too, my love." V told you as he pulled you even closer to him if that's still possible. "You see, I even rushed here to meet you."

And you? You couldn't explain the happiness that was flooding your chest and making it burst.

"But, how did you know I will go here?"

"Cassandra told me."

"Oh, I see."

"Hmm,..."

You gave him a look of utter confusion as he let you go, chuckling as he noticed the pout on your lips.

"I have,... something for you." He said as he grabbed something from his bag. You eagerly waited as he searched, and when he finally handed you a pack of popcorn, you couldn't help but smile.

"You bought this, V?" You asked him as the smell of butter reached your nostrils.

"Yes. We haven't finished Endgame, have we?"

"Come to think of it, no, we haven't." You admitted.

V smiled as he reached for his bag once more, producing a stuffed tiger from it and giving it to you, reminding you of,...

"Is this,... did you win this at the carnival?"

V proudly hummed. "I have,... quite a skill with,... should we say,... sniping?"

Oh, God, he remembered! You happily thought. He remembered I have a really bad aim and couldn't win the stuffed tiger at the carnival.

"And that's not all." V said.

"Hmm?"

"I went fishing."

"Oh, you did?! What happened?"

"I caught a boot."

"YOU DIDN'T!"

V laughed, the sound of his low voice sending warmth all throughout your whole body. In fact, you have never felt so warm in your entire life. And when he handed you a single boot from his bag just for laughs, you fell in love with him all over again.

"I - I never thought this is possible, oh my!" You confessed through fits of laughter, however, at this point, the smile on V's face vanished. You noticed this and went silent as he took the boot from your hands and upended it, making a small velvet box the color of your eyes fall from it. Then, he went down on one knee and opened the box, revealing the most beautiful ring with an emerald attached to it.

Why,... did you not see this coming?

But, whatever the reason was, V was right there, right in front of you, offering you something more than just an emerald ring inside a boot he claimed he has fished.

And when he looked into your eyes, you saw something.

Truth.

Loyalty.

Love.

Passion.

And most importantly,...

I see,... you thought as your heart filled up with love and gladness. My future,... before me,...

"(Y/N) (L/N)," V declared. " ... will you marry me?"

***

🖤 I See My Future Before Me 🖤

***

XXXV

***

🖤 @la-vita , @micaelagua , @vergils-daughter , @beyond-the-mirror , @clevermentalitybeliever , @lessy86 , @ceruleanworld , @diabeticsugarush , @yepps , @shadowrosess , @gothghoulfrend , @heaven-on-a-landslide , and @krazy06 . 🖤

***

#devil may cry 5 #vitale sparda #i see my future before me #v x reader #v x you #chapter 35 #i will #gladly! #finale #but wait #there's more!

[urmomification]

A Promise For A Later Date

ok so i wrote a yancy/illinois fic and I wanted to post it here before i forgot about it :) 

My hands glide across the familiar keys as I play the opening notes to a classic. The bar’s chatter settles into near silence as the notes progress. 

“At first I was afraid, I was petrified,” the words leave my mouth, pitch-perfect. The bright lights dim, a spotlight focusing on me. “Kept thinking I could never live without you by my side,” my hands sliding to hit all the right chords. I look over the top of the piano, looking. It’s been forever since I’ve performed in front of people.

It feels incredible.

“But then I spent so many nights thinking how you did me wrong, and I grew strong, and I learned how to get along.” Dragging my fingers in a glissando down the keys before spinning into a stand and grabbing the mic. 

“And so you’re back, from outer space. I just walked in to find you here with that sad look upon your face,” the lyrics leave my mouth, sounding like butter. My whole body is moving to the backing track that has come on.

My eyes sweep the crowd for a familiar face when they land on an even more familiar cowboy hat. He’s here! “I shoulda changed that stupid lock, I shoulda made you leave your key,” I didn’t think he’d actually come looking for me.

He’ll recognize me eventually, but right now? I have a show to finish. “If I’da known for just one second you’d be back to bother me!” I sing, using the piano bench to jump onto the top of the piano. The crowd roars and sings along with me. How couldn’t they? Everyone knows this song like the back of their hands.

“Go on now, go!” My weight balances on my front foot, leaning out towards the crowd. I feel like electricity is burning through all my nerves and bursting at my fingertips. I haven’t felt this alive since, since, never. 

My foot bounces to the beat as my eyes dance from face to face in the crowd. I see mostly happy, singing faces. Faces full of joy and laughter, then I see a cowboy hat’s face. Illinois’ face is dressed in shock. Like he didn’t know that I sang. I smirk and wink at him before dropping the next line.

“Walk out the door! Just turn around now, ‘cause you’re not welcome anymore!” My shoulders bounce with each syllable. I look back at Illinois and his stupid hat, to realize he’s gotten about 10 feet closer. I raise my eyebrow in challenge, daring him to come to the front.

‘Why don’t youse sing?’ I asked. 

‘There are different types of confidence, darlin’. Singin’ and flirtin’ are two completely different games.’ He said with a wink.

I vividly remember not believing him. How could someone be so confident, to say whatever they wanted to pretty much everyone, but not enough confidence to sing a few lines in front of a small crowd? It just didn’t add up in my head.

“Weren’t you the one who tried to hurt me with goodbye? Did you think I’d crumble? Did you think I’d lay down and die?” I jump back down off the piano and shove the mic into the standing mic stand. “Oh no not I!” My shoulders and hips moving in sync to the different beats in the song. 

I’m on cloud nine. Elated. I owe all of this to Illinois, but will I ever have the guts to tell him that? Probably not. I do owe him a thank you, but the very least he could dance with me. He’s the one who convinced me to leave Happy Trails after all, I don’t know where I’d be if it weren’t for him.

‘I don’t dance.’

His voice rings in my ears. I know he doesn’t dance. Or sing. All he does is flirt, day in and day out. With everyone too. I’ve heard one too many cheesy lines myself. One too many, ‘be careful, you might fall for me’s. One too many winks that make my heart feel like a whip is being cracked. He says what he knows will affect people. 

And it works. It works too well. I find myself needing to bite my tongue around him to keep from admitting what I know he wants to hear from me.

That I’ve fallen for him.

Speak of the devil. Illinois stands a few people back from the front of the crowd where I stand. There’s still that (embarrassingly) shocked face on him. It’s a look I will admit that is rare for a self-assured adventurer as himself. 

“I will survive!”  Shock isn’t a good look on him either. His brows scrunch up under the brim of his hat, and his mouth hangs slightly open. He looks a little bit like a frog.

I smile at the comparison. I rip my eyes off him and continue the song. After all, I didn’t come here to impress him, I have a crowd to please.

“Oh as long as I know how to love, I know I’ll stay alive!” I walk along the front of the crowd, mic in hand, encouraging them to clap along. I back step, bouncing each step of the way towards the mic stand. 

Glancing back, Illinois now stands at the frontmost position in the crowd. A ballsy move for a guy who ‘doesn’t’ dance or sing who’s also within arms reach of being pulled into the middle of a performance that happens to include both. 

“I’ve got all my life to live, and I’ve got all my love to give, and I’ll survive, I will survive!” I grab his arm, pull him to the mic stand and shove the mic into his hands. He fumbles before I glare at him and he sings, voice shaking, “Hey, hey!”

His face is set in a panic, his eyes darting around, but his cheeks are bright pink from shock. I don’t think I’ve ever seen him blush a day in his life.

I beam. I got him out here. I knew he wouldn’t do it on his own, so I made him. So what if he doesn’t dance or sing? He can do it for one night, for me.

“What the hell are you doing?!” He whisper-shouts at me. I dance lightly to the instrumental part of the song, waiting for the next verse.

“What I’ve wanted to do my whole life,” I say back, smiling wider than I can ever remember doing before. 

“That’s super cool for you but why am I here?”

“Because youse wouldn’t come out here on your own, so I made youse come out here,” my arms and hips dipping to the violin runs.

“Yance, c’mon please let me leave, I really don’t wanna be out here-”

“It took all the strength I had not to fall apart, kept tryin’ hard to mend the pieces of my broken heart,” sing, taking the mic from him. That boy may look pretty and say a lot of things most people would be embarrassed to even think about, but damn does he have a terrible show presence. 

I guess there are different types of confidence.

I shove the mic back into his hand and lean over his shoulder. “And I spent oh so many nights just feelin’ sorry for myself,” I hear him start to mumble along.

“I used to cry,” I lead, setting him up for the next line.

“And now I hold my head up high.” He finishes. He holds the mic like a lifeline, as the next line comes up. 

I see him sigh, rolling his eyes. “And you see me, somebody new.” He sings with actual intent. I can’t help but stare. He, he does sing! I jog over to the side of the small stage area, grabbing another mic before jogging back.

“I’m not that chained up little person still in love with you,” I harmonize. His voice is deeper than mine, our harmony rings richly in the moderately sized bar.

The crowd roars. I glance at Illinois out of the corner of my eye. He’s smiling. No, scratch that, he’s glowing. I’ve never seen a smile that big on anyone’s face, I think ever. 

I reach up before I can stop myself and grab his hat right off his head, resting it on my own. 

“So you felt like dropping in and just expect me to be free, but now I’m saving all my lovin’ for someone who’s lovin’ me!” We sing together, his eyes following me as I adjust his hat on my head. I hear whistles in the crowd and I smirk.

His cheeks heat up the longer I look at him, his face painted with a faint pink. It’s cute. Feeling bold, I grab the edge of the hat and wink. He sputters, frantically turning back towards the crowd. Being out here has put him on edge, I like being able to make him shy. It’s a new sensation, charming the charmer.

“Go on now go! Walk out the door!” I leap onto the piano bench, planting a foot on the edge above the keys. Illinois’ voice is honey in the air, hanging heavy on the walls. God, why is he good at everything? Everything!

Well, not everything yet, at least. Can he dance is the question. I look over at him and he’s moved to sit on the end of the piano, legs out towards the crowd, his upper body moving to the beat. I hop up on top of the piano and lightly shove him off.

“Just turn around now, ‘cause you’re not welcome anymore!” I jam my finger into his chest, walking him backward. “Weren’t you the one who tried to b-break me with goodbye? Did you think I’d crumble, did you think I’d lay down and die?” He stutters as he trips over his feet. 

I rip his hat off my head and throw it back onto his, the string falling under his chin.

“Dance with me cowboy,” I whisper as he sings the next line of the chorus. I grab his hand that isn’t holding the microphone, leading him into a makeshift swing dance.

“Oh no not I! I will survive!” Our feet kick out and to the sides as he gets into the swing of things. He can’t really dance, that’s one thing that I have on him. I watch him as he holds the mic close to face while keeping his gaze fixed on his feet as to avoid stepping on my feet. 

The drone of the crowd fades out. It’s just me and him, dancing and singing together. Him nearly tripping over our feet and me singing my heart out. I couldn’t wish for a more amazing night. 

The repetition of the phrase ‘I will survive’ dies on our tongues dies out and I spin Illinois into a dip. He yelps as all his weight is balanced on one foot and my arms. His hat falls off his head and hangs by his neck. The crowd cheers and people clap. It sounds like thunder in my ears. 

My chest heaves and I pull Illinois back onto both of his feet. I grab his hat from behind his shoulders and situate it back on his head. His cheeks seemed to be permanently stained with a pink blush, shock on top of the effort of dancing and singing.

A smile dances on my face as the crowd ushers us off the stage. I leave the mics on the piano before turning back to Illinois. He’s smiling directly at me. The lights making his caramel skin glow. He looks beautiful.

He walks up to me, shoving his hands into his belt loops. “As much fun as that was, if you ever drag me onto a stage again while you’re performing, you’re sleeping on the floor.” He says with a loose smile on his face, I can’t tell if he’s joking or not.

“So youse admit it was fun?” I ask, my accent coming back after singing. He rolls his eyes and guides me towards the door. 

“Ok, yes, I had fun.” I smile at him, my eyebrow raised. “Hey! That does not mean I want to do it again.” He huffs and holds the door of the bar open for me. 

“Aw, we’s ain’t staying for longa’? Youse know they were gon’ give us free drinks for performin’, right?” I complain, looking up at him.

“Of course darlin’, but we’ve got a big day tomorrow and I can’t have you bein’ hungover,” a smile ghosting his face, it being all the more apparent in his eyes. I sigh, he’s right. He told me about it earlier. 

“How’d youse even find me? I told youse I was goin’ out, but I didn’t tell youse where.” I ask stopping and turning to him.

“It was quite easy actually. Just asked around if anyone had seen a five-foot-seven gremlin in striped sweatpants then followed the sound of musical numbers to the nearest bar,” he said smiling. 

“Hey! I’s ain’t a gremlin!” I swing at him lightly, jabbing his shoulder. I pout crossing my arms over my chest. He plants a hand on my shoulder and looks at me.

“But in all seriousness, thank you for making me do, that. It’s been too long since I’ve done anything of the sort, so, thank you, Yancy,” he stares at me, not saying anything more.

God, I am so thoroughly screwed. He looks so good under the street lights, the lamp posts catching the brim of his hat and casting a shadow onto his face. I’m pretty sure god himself couldn’t find a flaw even if he tried. I could kiss him right now-

I’m staring, aren’t I?

“I- uh, yeah, it’s no problem. Youse got an incredible voice though, youse know that right?” I stutter, I need to be more careful, I can’t just stare at him whenever I want to, that’s just weird.

He chuckles and scratches the back of his neck. “As I’ve been told, yes. But thank you anyway.” 

“Why don’t youse sing more then? If youse is so good at it and all?” Now I’m curious if he’s so good at it, why would he be so self-conscious about it? 

“Well, I, to be honest, don’t really know. I’ve just never gotten around to it, I guess?” He shrugs, turning to continue walking.

“Flimsy excuse,” I mumble, he just chuckles and keeps walking. “But youse is a terrible dancer, there’s no way around that one. Youse has got to let me teach youse how to dance, youse move like a constipated log.” 

A loud laugh comes from in front of me. “Ok, I’ll make you a deal. I’ll let you teach me how to dance if you don’t complain at all on the next adventure, ok?” 

“Really? Can I start now?” I ask, possibly a little too excitedly. 

“Save it for another time. We have a good night’s rest to tackle,” he says loosely over his shoulder while walking away from me.

 Another time.

#my writing #yancy/illinois #ahwm #when copy paste doesn't carry over italics but ur too lazy to re read it and put them all back in :| #ahwm yancy #illinois ahwm

[robinrunsfiction]

'Cause Heaven Knows What You Do To Me

Pairing: Ryan Seaman x Female Reader Rating: General Requested By: None Word Count: 4,100 Author’s Note: When I was going through prompts for the Twelve Days of Christmas Challenge, I found the prompt “No one should be alone on New Years Eve” and about that same time Ryan posted an insta story of a hotel room in Vegas that he was staying in before a show and that leads us to this story. I hope you like it and have a wonderful new year! (also I have to say I can’t get over how wonderful he looks in the mood board below ok bye)

“Hey (YN), I was wondering what you’re doing for New Years Eve?” Ryan asked when (YN) answered the phone.

“Nothing, why?” (YN) asked suspiciously.

“Wondering if you wanna come along to our show in Vegas. The room is being comped by the hotel because of the show, all you have to do is pack a bag,” Ryan offered.

“But it’s New Years Eve in Vegas, doesn’t that just sound… overwhelming?” (YN) sighed.

“We don’t have to go out, we can just hang out with Dal and Breezy. Come on (YN), what other plans do you have for New Years Eve?” Ryan asked.

“None,” (YN) grumbled.

“No one should be alone on New Year’s Eve, so it’s settled,” Ryan said and (YN) could have sworn she could hear his smile through the phone and she couldn’t help but laugh.

“Fine, but promise me that we won’t get drunk and get married at a drive-thru chapel.”

“I promise, I won’t get you drunk enough to want to marry me,” Ryan laughed, but what (YN) didn’t realize was Ryan was running his hand over his face wearily as he paced his kitchen.

What Ryan didn’t know was (YN) had immediately regretted saying what she did and was cringing hard. “So I guess just send me the flight itinerary and stuff then?” she asked trying to change the subject.

“Yea, I’ll send that over and I’ll see you in a couple days.”

“Can’t wait,” (YN) smiled before saying goodbye. When she hung up, she rolled over on her couch and buried her face in a pillow and screamed. A paid trip to Vegas with the guy she’d been crushing on for years at New Years? She wasn’t entirely sure she could handle it. She and Ryan had always had a flirty kind of friendship. The little compliments they gave each other, touches on an arm, hand on the lower back in a crowd, attending events together because who else would they call? It seemed natural that he would ask her to come along on this trip, but that didn't make it any less intimidating. 

Anxiety over the trip built over the following days, but on the morning of December 31st, (YN) woke up feeling surprisingly calm. She had packed a few outfits that she would feel confident wearing, and run over every possible scenario of things that could happen on this trip, which ranged from the most likely series of events (seeing the show with Breezy, going out to eat after with everyone, then retiring back to the room with Ryan to separate beds after ringing in the New Year with a responsibly consumed drink), to the least likely (an absolutely debauched, booze fueled, all-night rager that definitely included a hot tub and lots of sexy times with Ryan in said hot tub). But every time that idea popped into her head, she shooed it away, it was too much and ridiculous. 

The flight to Vegas was short, but (YN) and Ryan had a ton of fun together as they always did. When they arrived at the hotel, (YN) was a little blown away, she’d been to Vegas before, but hadn’t stayed someplace this nice. Ryan went to the desk to check in, as (YN) wandered through the lobby. She glanced over at Ryan when she realized it was taking a while to check in. He ran his hand through his brown hair, and looked over at her.

“They only have a king bed room available,” Ryan said when (YN) came over.

“Oh, umm, I mean that’s ok with me,” (YN) replied, hoping it wasn’t noticeable that she was blushing.

“If you’re ok with it,” Ryan shrugged, trying to appear casual.

“Ok then, let’s get up there before you guys have to get to sound check,” (YN) smiled.

When they got up to the room, they were both blown away by how modern and cool the room was. (YN) managed to ignore the elephant in the room that was the king size bed, but then she spotted the hot tub in the bathroom and the steamy thoughts threatened to creep back into her mind.

“Oh shit,” she muttered shaking her head.

“Hmm?” Ryan asked.

“Nothing,” she smiled nervously. “I think I forgot something, but I'll manage. Did you see this view?” She asked walking up to the balcony doors.

Ryan came up next to her, standing a little closer than normal. “Yea the room is really nice. Well except for the bed thing.”

(YN) felt a pang of hurt go through her heart. “Yea,” she replied without looking up.

Ryan instantly knew he had said the wrong thing. He didn't mind the idea of sharing the bed with (YN), but he didn't want her to feel uncomfortable either. Just as he was about to open his mouth to clarify, his phone went off. It was the band's manager letting them know they had to head to soundcheck. 

In the meantime, (YN) met up with Breezy in the lobby and they decided to grab coffee and walk around before heading to the venue for the show.

"So when did you and Ryan finally start going out?" Breezy asked as they stepped out of the coffee shop. 

(YN) nearly choked on the iced coffee she was sipping. "What? No, we're just friends."

"Oh sorry, I just assumed since he brought you along and…" she trailed off.

"And?" (YN) pressed.

Breezy sighed. "You just seem to really be into each other."

It was (YN)'s turn to sigh. "Yea, but I don't think it's really something that's gonna happen. I mean, you'd think it woulda happened by now if it was gonna."

"Maybe the you guys just need a push, or to let the stars align, or just take advantage of being someplace new for a fresh perspective."

(YN) laughed. "You seem really invested in this."

"I just think I'm right and you guys just need to see what's in front of your faces" Breezy smiled knowingly.

~

(YN) and Breezy watched from the side of the stage as the band played their set with their usual gusto. IDKHow's set was in the middle of a day long musical festival with artists of all different genres. The concert was absolutely amazing, and the crowd was into the band, even though they weren't the biggest band performing, but to the four of them, the best part was the fact that their set was done by 7 PM.

(YN) loved watching Ryan play, the energy and enthusiasm he put into it was incredible and she could feel herself grinning the whole time. Ryan had spotted (YN) at the side of the stage and kept shooting smiles her way. He loved having her there and all he could think about as he played his heart out was that he wished she could be at every show.

“That was awesome, I swear you guys get better every time I see you play!” (YN) exclaimed when they came off stage.

“Thanks (YN),” Dallon beamed.

“We’re gonna go up and get ready while you guys get everything torn down and grab showers down here,” Breezy cut in before quickly whisking (YN) back upstairs. 

“Do you wanna bring your stuff over to our room and we can get ready together?” Breezy asked as they rode the elevator up.

“Sounds like fun,” (YN) replied as the doors opened on their floor.

A while later, Breezy and (YN) were putting on the final touches to their hair and makeup as Dallon returned.

“Ready for a night out- woah! Babe you look incredible!” He grinned when Breezy stepped out of the bathroom, she had changed into black leather leggings and a sparkly green top. He took her hand and spun her around before pulling her into a kiss.

“Thank you love, but you should see (YN), she went all out!” Breezy replied when she pulled back.

“I think it’s too much!” (YN) called from the bathroom. She was tugging at her outfit and checking her makeup closely in the mirror. She was worried she had picked too flashy of an outfit since she didn’t know where they were going.

“No it’s not, come on out,” Breezy reassured her. Just then there was a knock on the door.

“I’ll get it,” Dallon said.

(YN) stepped out of the bathroom just as Dallon let Ryan into the room. When Ryan saw (YN) in her short black sequin covered dress and black tuxedo jacket he could have sworn his heart stopped. He always thought she was beautiful, and he had seen her dressed up before, but tonight she took his breath away like never before.

“Wow, (YN),” Ryan started, a dopey grin spreading across his face. “You look amazing.”

“Yea, you look fantastic,” Dallon commented as Breezy beamed.

“Thanks,” (YN) said with a light laugh. “Now can we get going? I’m starving.”

Dallon ushered the group out and down the hall toward the elevator. Ryan offered (YN) his arm and she grinned as she linked her arm in his as they hurried down the hall.

"Wait, where are we going?" (YN) asked as they got in the elevator and Dallon pressed the up arrow.

"We got reservations at the rooftop restaurant," Dallon grinned.

"Seriously?" Breezy grinned and Dallon shrugged smugly.

"They're going all out for you guys tonight!" (YN) said, astonished.

"I think it's the best we've ever been treated," Ryan laughed as the doors opened on the top floor.

The restaurant was cozy and dimly lit with decor that had a vintage feel, but was still modern and fresh. The group was taken to a plush booth in the corner of the bustling restaurant with Dallon and Breezy sliding in on one side, and (YN) and Ryan on the other. The conversation flowed easily between friends as drinks and dinner were ordered.

“What are we going to do after this? Dancing?” Breezy asked, looking from Dallon to Ryan and (YN). 

“Oooh yea,” (YN) grinned.

“Sure,” Ryan shrugged.

Dallon groaned at first, but a smile crept on his face. “I can’t say no to you,” he replied to his wife.

Everyone chuckled at Dallon concession as their food was brought out. (YN) wasn’t exactly sure when it happened, but at some point in the shuffle of plates being passed, she found her leg brush against Ryan’s under the table, and to her surprise he didn’t pull away from her. Emboldened, she also didn’t pull away from the hidden contact and even glanced over at him, giving him a sly smile that he returned, much to her delight.

~

At dinner, they got a recommendation from their waiter of a club that was a short walk from the hotel. When they arrived they were able to find a table and ordered another round of drinks and watched the crowd for a while.

When the DJ put on a new song, Breezy’s face lit up. “I love this song, let’s go dance!”

“I’ll go!” (YN) grinned, jumping up and peeling off her jacket before going out onto the dance floor.

“How’d we get so lucky?” Dallon asked, sitting back contentedly, long legs extending out in front of him.

“Hmm?” Ryan asked, his attention being pulled from (YN) on the dancefloor to his bandmate.

Dallon nodded toward the women. “How’d we get so lucky to get ladies like Breezy and (YN)?”

“But (YN) and I aren’t together,” Ryan said confused, feeling like he was starting to blush.

Dallon laughed. “Come on, you mean to tell me you don’t have feelings for (YN)?”

“Well yea, but-”

“Then make your move. She’s obviously into you too,” Dallon smiled.

Ryan ran his hand through his hair. “What if she’s not though and everything gets screwed up?”

“Ryan, I saw the way you two were looking at each other during the show. I know that look, it’s the same one Breezy gives me,” Dallon replied knowingly.

Ryan laughed and then sighed. “Yea, I mean… yea, I should, I know I should. It’s just… how do you know when it's the right time to take that chance?”

(YN) and Breezy were enjoying themselves on the dancefloor when a man approached them. “Hey ladies, how are we doing tonight?” He ogled.

Breezy simply held up her left hand, displaying her wedding ring in response. “Not interested.”

The guy turned to face (YN). “How ‘bout you Toots, you married too?”

(YN) laughed. “Well no, but-”

“Then come dance with me!”

“No thanks, I’m here with my friends.”

“Aw come on, just one song, it’s not like I’m asking you to come home with me.”

(YN) shook her head. “We just got here ok? Let us be for a while.”

The guy took a step forward, looming over (YN). She could hear Breezy saying her name, but she was frozen in place, suddenly intimidated by the stranger.

“Hey, is this guy bugging you?” (YN) heard the words and felt a protective arm wrap around her waist. She looked up at Ryan who was staring the guy down.

“Yea, like a lot,” (YN) replied.

“Leave them alone,” Ryan commanded and the guy threw his hands up in defeat before walking away.

“Thanks Ryan,” Breezy said with a weary smile. 

“Why can’t the creeps just leave us alone?” (YN) rolled her eyes as the group collectively relaxed now that the stranger was gone.

“Because you’re gorgeous,” Ryan said so easily that he didn’t realize what had rolled off his tongue until he saw the stunned and amused look that Breezy was giving him. 

(YN) laughed and covered her face with her hand to hide how much she was blushing. “Thanks,” she mumbled. “Anyway, I love this song, can we please dance now?”

“Yes please!” Breezy said as she started moving to the music.

Ryan turned to go back to the table where Dallon was sitting, but (YN) grabbed his wrist. “Stay,” she said.

A smile crept across his face as his hands found her waist again as she moved her hips to the beat of the music. They had been to concerts together before, and therefore had danced together, but everything about this night felt different. (YN) draped her arms over his shoulders as they moved together to the rhythm of the music. 

Neither was sure how many songs had played, only that they kept moving closer to each other. (YN) felt her heart pounding in her chest under Ryan's gaze as she played with the hair at the nape of his neck. She felt like if she leaned in right then, he would have met her halfway.

But suddenly Ryan looked up, something grabbing his attention. (YN) turned and saw what he spotted. Dallon had come out onto the dance floor as well, but instead of dancing, he was saying something to Breezy, whose face was concerned.

“Dallon’s not feeling well, he’s got a really bad headache and kinda wants to go,” Breezy told (YN).

“Oh damn. Yea it’s loud and I bet that’s making it worse, we can go,” (YN) agreed.

“I’m sorry to ruin the night,” Dallon said rubbing his forehead wearily as soon as the group was outside the club, the bass still booming as they headed back toward the hotel.

“It’s fine, we understand,” Ryan said sympathetically. As they walked down the sidewalk, bustling with people on their way to their New Years celebrations, Ryan tried to decide if he should try to take (YN)’s hand the way Dallon held Breezy’s. Bu before he had made a decision they were already approaching the hotel and he realized he had missed his chance.

~

(YN) kicked off her heels as soon as she got into the hotel room. "That was so much fun," she laughed sitting on the edge of the bed. "I'm so glad you convinced me to come with you."

"I'm really glad you agreed to come along," he smiled before taking a deep, nervous breath. "I just really love-"

Suddenly there was a knock at the door, interrupting Ryan. (YN) sighed as he went to answer it. She wanted to know so badly what he was about to say. Did he love her? Did he love Vegas? Was he about to confess his love of something, or someone, else altogether?

Ryan came back pushing a cart with a bottle of champagne and two glasses.

"Woah, where did that come from?"

"The note says ‘Sorry to cut the party short! Dallon and Breezy’.”

"Wow! Do we wanna wait until midnight to pop it open?"

"Sure," Ryan nodded, setting the note back down. "Um (YN), I was gonna say before, I really love being here with you and seeing that guy trying to get with you at the club… I just can't let any more time go by," he said rubbing the back of his neck and squeezed his eyes shut. As (YN) listened, her heart started pounding and her head spun. "I'm sorry if this makes things weird, but I'm crazy about you (YN)," Ryan said finally with a shrug, opening his eyes.

"Seriously?"

He nodded and ran his hands over his face. "I'm so sorry if this ruins everything between us, I thought-"

Ryan's rambling was cut off by (YN) standing up and closing the distance between them. "Ryan, I've had a crush on you for… years, I was just never sure you would feel the same way."

"How could I not? You're beautiful, and smart, and funny," he trailed off as her grin grew across her face. In that moment Ryan decided he had waited long enough. His hands found her waist and pulled her the rest of the distance between them.

(YN) looked up at him, one hand resting on his arm, the other on his chest. "Kiss me," she breathed and that was all it took for his lips to crash against hers. She gripped at his shirt as if it were a lifeline with one hand, as other found its way to his brown hair.

His kiss was full of longing, of hours spent laying awake at night never fathoming that this moment could really happen. And in case it never happened again, he wanted to remember every moment of it. How her lips felt against his, how her waist felt under his hands, the sounds that escaped her lips as he moved down to kiss her neck.

Ryan pulled back as he reached up and brushed the jacket off her shoulders and (YN) let it fall to the ground at her feet. She pulled him back in as she took a step back toward the bed, and he followed, barely breaking contact with her lips as she crawled up the bed and he followed, undoing the top buttons of his shirt.

(YN) deepened the kiss by letting his tongue slip against hers. She ran a hand through his hair as his hand ghosted down her side to rest on her hip, his other arm holding him up. He then began to again trace kisses down her jaw, back to her neck until he found a spot that made her moan lightly as he kissed it, a sound he decided he would never grow tired of hearing.

(YN) hadn't had a proper make out in what felt like years, but this moment with Ryan was more than she could have ever hoped for. Any doubt that clouded her mind about his feelings for her vanished when his lips met hers, the longing and caring she felt from him was incredible. The way he kept his hands on her, as if she might slip away, tugged at her heart because she knew there was nowhere else she could possibly want to be. 

(YN) and Ryan were suddenly started by a loud bang outside the hotel room. They jumped apart as they looked at each other, confused.

"What was that?" Ryan asked breathlessly.

(YN) pushed the pillows away as she looked back at the bedside clock. "Fireworks, because it's midnight," she beamed.

"Oh yea," he laughed before leaning in to kiss her again. "Happy New Year (YN)."

"Happy New Year, Ryan. Do you want to open that bottle of champagne now?"

"Sure," he replied, getting up, and offering (YN) his hand to help her up.

"Do it off the balcony so you don't break anything in here," she laughed. They took a step out into the cold desert night and Ryan popped the cork off the bottle, launching it somewhere into the Sunset Strip. He poured each of them a glass before wrapping his arms around her waist to hold her close. (YN) let her head rest back against his shoulder and sighed contentedly as they watched the fireworks in the distance.

After they were done, Ryan pressed a kiss to the top of (YN)'s head as she yawned. "I'm suddenly realizing how tired I am. It's been kind of a long day."

"You're right, wanna go to bed?"

(YN) nodded sleepily as they went back inside. 

~

The next morning, (YN) woke up with her head on Ryan's chest. He had his arm wrapped around her, holding her close. When he noticed her starting to stir, he pressed a kiss to the top of her head and she looked up at him with sleepy eyes.

"Morning beautiful," he murmured. 

"Morning," she mumbled and Ryan couldn't help but smile at how cute she was when she was still half asleep. "What time is it?"

"Just after nine," he replied looking at his phone.

"I guess I was tired," she said, hiding her face against the crook of his neck and she heard him laughing a little as well.

"Dallon and Breezy were wondering if we wanna get brunch with them before we gotta catch our flights."

"Yea, sounds good," (YN) replied as she stretched, squeezing her eyes shut. When she opened them and looked back up at Ryan, he was looking back at her adoringly.

"What?" She giggled.

"I'm just thinking about how lucky I am. It's like the stars finally aligned for us."

(YN) leaned in for a long, languid kiss. "This year is gonna be the best yet," she murmured. 

A couple hours later, Ryan and (YN) met up with Dallon and Breezy for brunch at another restaurant in the expansive hotel. Although no one dared to draw attention to it, the other couple was very excited to see Ryan and (YN) arriving hand in hand and quickly noticed the energy between them was different. The brunch was delightful, with everyone talking about their plans and hopes for the new year.

"Hey, I'm gonna run to the bathroom, (YN)?" Breezy asked.

"Oh sure, I'll come along," she smiled, getting up knowing exactly what she was in for.

"What happened?!" Breezy squealed as the door shut behind them.

"What do you mean?" (YN) replied coyly.

"You know what I mean," Breezy laughed. "You arrived holding hands and he's looking at you like you hung the moon, like more than normal."

"It was a really nice night," (YN) smiled and shrugged.

"Aww! I'm so happy for you two!" Breezy said while throwing her arms around her friend.

"I just hope this isn't just a vacation thing, ya know? Like when we get home, it's back to how we were before and it's like this never happened."

"I'm sure it won't be. He clearly adores you. I've been friends with him long enough to know."

After finishing their meals, everyone headed back to their rooms to finish packing. The reality that the whirlwind trip was almost over had finally hit and (YN) found herself feeling blue as doubts started to nag at her mind. She snapped shut her suitcase and sat down on the edge of the bed.

"Hey Ryan," (YN) started.

"Yea?"

"This isn't like just a 'what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas' thing, right?"

Ryan looked up from his suitcase and saw the sadness in her eyes and it made his heart break a little. He sat down next to her on the bed, taking her hands and looking in her eyes. "No (YN), I'm all in for this, for us, if you are?"

"Yea,” she nodded. “I don't want this to end here. I've waited too long to throw it away now."

He leaned in and kissed her sweetly, smiling and caressing her cheek lovingly when they pulled back. "Come on, we got a flight to catch."

"Back to reality," she groaned dramatically.

"We'll have to come back here sometime when we have more time. Maybe actually use the hot tub," Ryan suggested and (YN) couldn't help but grin.

#ryan seaman x reader #ryan seaman fanfic #ryan seaman fan fiction #ryan seaman imagine #idkhow fanfic #idkhow fanfiction #idkhow x reader #idkhow imagine #ryan seman x reader #ryan seaman fan fic #idkhow fan fic #idkhow fan fiction

[mrswalkers-blog]

Falling in Love with you

Chapter 9 -  Broken

Book: The Royal Romance ( Drake x MC & Liam x Olivia)

Summary: Olivia says she is okay with keeping it casual with Liam. But she cannot - It hurts her deep that she is nothing but a political alliance for Liam. Liam is drunk and rambles about Riley in front of Drake. Olivia finds some evidence about Drake’s accident and shares them with Riley. 

Warnings: PG.

A/N: I know it has been ages since I last wrote this series. But I am surprised as still people love it. Thanks for all the love :). This is for all of you. 

PLEASE NOTE; I will not be including links to past chapters in this post due to Tumblr’s new algorithms. If you need past chapters, please see my master list on my blog bio or ask me directly.

Face Claim: Drake Walker - Daniel Di Tomasso

Riley Walker (Brooks) - Katrina Kaif

King Liam Rhys - Daniel Henney

Olivia Rhys (Nevrakis) - Emma Stone

Kiara - Bianca Lawson

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Almost two years ago

Olivia had a small smile playing on her lips when she entered the Palace. Soon this was going to be her home. She had a spring in her feet as she navigated to Liam's office. She was much too early for their appointment with the wedding planner. But she couldn’t wait any longer to meet Liam and plan their wedding.

When she reached Liam's office, to her surprise, the door was ajar. She was about to knock on the door when she heard her name. It was Queen Mother Regina, she was having some argument with Liam and clearly the topic was her.

Her first instinct was to just barge in the room and confront Regina herself. But hearing Liam's voice, she stopped, eavesdropping on their conversation. She really needed to know what Liam thought about her.

'You know your father would never have approved of her' Regina tried to reason with Liam.

'I know that mother, but pardon me when I say this but father did a mistake judging Olivia.' Liam calmly responded. Olivia smiled listening to him.

'Have you forgotten that her parents were traitors?' Regina was getting frustrated.

“No, I have not.” Liam was still calm,”But perhaps you have forgotten her contribution in capturing Anton. She has more than proved herself loyal to the crown”. Olivia knew it was not easy for Liam to make her Queen, given the history of her ancestors. There were far too many traitors in her lineage for anyone to put trust in a Nevrakis.

'She still has the Nevrakis blood. You never know when it surfaces.' Regina argued. That’s not my fault -Olivia wanted to shout at her. This was not the first time someone judged her because of her ancestors, but it still hurt her, it always did.

'I don't know how to respond to that!' Liam was a little irritated by this comment,' My decision is final. I even have court's approval.'

'You won by a single vote, Liam! You think I don't know how you swayed the votes in your favor!' Regina retorted. Olivia was listening to their conversation from the corridor with her heart in her mouth. She just realized what Liam went through to be with her. She felt grateful for him. She knew he was the only one who really understood her.

Liam refused to respond to Regina. He just shook his head and looked away from her, indicating he no longer wished to continue this conversation. But Regina was not going to back away this easy.

“I don't understand this! I believed you were level headed! You are a King. It is your duty to keep your kingdom first. But you keep falling in love with the wrong girls. First the American waitress and now a Nevrakis!”

'I don't love her.' Liam stated firmly,'This is a political marriage. It is time that a Nevrakis sit on the throne. Nevrakis has tried every means to be on throne. Making a Nevrakis a Queen of Cordonia will rest their endeavour to rest for some time.’ He sighed. Yes, it was one of the reasons he had thought for choosing Olivia.

I don't love her,It is time that a Nevrakis sit on the throne - the words heating her like a hammer in her mind, but the heart was the one taking the blows. She walked - almost ran - towards - she had no clue where.

She tried taking deep breaths, but she felt her blood boiling. She could sense a rage coming , a tornado forming inside her. But there was nothing she could do to stop it. It was already out of her control. 

She found herself in front of a door, she pushed it open and stormed inside, finding herself in one of the dining rooms. Staff who were setting up the table, froze , looking at their future Queen charging inside the room.

They bowed down gently. If it were her estate in Lythikos, the staff would have fled , knowing what was coming next.

'GET THE HELL OUT' Olivia shouted at them. But she didn't wait till they clear the room. She reached for a plate set on the table. Played with it for a moment in her hands, as if weighing it.

'He never said that he loved you.' a voice in her head tried to reason with her. She knew Liam didn't love her, he never said he did. He had made it very clear that they will remain friends with benefits. She knew he was marrying her because the rules required him to and that he couldn't find anyone better than her. But still hearing him say that out loud hurt her deeply. Or it hurt her more because he said it to his mother.

Next thing she knew, the plate in her hand flew across the room ,colliding with a statue, causing a loud crack. The next moment, the statue and  the plate both were on the floor broken into a thousand pieces just like her heart.

She was always alone, after her parents died. There was no one who actually cared for her, who loved her. Two more plates were now on floor along with half the chandelier.

Every one she met either hated her or judged her or wanted something from her. Except Liam. But when Liam confessed to his mother that he is only marrying her because she is a Nevrakis, she lost control of herself. Olivia wanted to stop, stop causing this scene.But she couldn’t.

The rage inside her showed no sign of stopping even though all plates and cutlery on the table were on the ground, all across the room. She was now going for a vase. She grabbed the vase from its neck and was about to throw it when she heard her name - ‘Olivia!’ . As soon as she heard his voice, the storm inside her stopped. It was amazing how just his presence could calm her down. She paused, her hand slowly came down.

She didn't turn. She stood in her place, breathing heavily, still the after effects of the rage hadn't passed.

Liam came in front of her. ‘ Can you hand me the vase?’ he asked softly. Olivia didn't move, but she let him take the vase away. Liam kept the vase on the dining table.

She prepared herself for what was coming next - He would judge her for behaving so fiercely , humiliate her in front of everyone, tell her to see a therapist or he might even broke off the engagement.

He cautiously stepped towards her. ‘What happened Olivia!?’ he asked looking at her. Olivia glared at him, ready for the next question, but he gently held her hand. ‘You can tell me anything, Liv’ there was genuine concern in his voice. Olivia blinked, looking at him in amazement for a second and then wrapped her arms around him, holding him tightly. She could listen to his heart , smell his cologne , feel his hands gently rubbing her back while holding her tight against him and his soft voice vibrating against her skin - ‘It’s alright!’ , ‘Are you okay?’

She was getting calm, peaceful in his embrace. She didn't care that the entire staff was watching them, whispering about her. She had no clue that Queen Regina was looking pointedly at Liam. She completely forgot that she was angry on Liam a few moments ago. She knew he cared for her and for now it was enough.

She didn't realize that she accidentally sighed ,’ I love you’ , loud enough. It was merely a whisper, but her lips were close to his ears, and with the warm air the words reached him too. Those three magical words that Liam heard from Olivia for the first time, made him realize the reason for her outrage.

A week before today

Drake was lying in his bed at the palace, in his underwear, trying to get some sleep. But the happenings of the day wouldn't leave him. Kiara told him somethings that left him confused. Although his life after he woke up was already pretty messed up. And now his affair with Kiara. 

Kiara was an attractive woman. A smart, no nonsense , more logical than emotional woman. He respected her, but never had feelings for her. He didn't knew she had feelings for him either. He was a commoner and Kiara was a noble. So the thought had never occurred to him. 

He was also a bit rattled by the information about Liam and Olivia. Had the situation gone that bad that they were considering separation? He had sensed a little tension between Liam and Olivia when Olivia interrupted him and Liam in the afternoon in his office. But couldn't they work it out? He was never a fan of Olivia. But he knew Olivia really cared for Liam. She always did. Was it true that Liam and Riley…..?

The loud ring of his phone snapped him out of his thoughts. Liam - the name flashed on his screen. He checked the time on his phone - nearly midnight. Why is he calling at this hour?

He sat up in his bed. 'Liam? Is everything okay?' he asked as soon as he picked up the call. 

'Everything is... Purrrrfect! ' Liam's speech was slurred, 'Come to my room! We will share some whiskey.'  

'To your room? Now? Wouldn't Olivia be there?' Drake asked. 

'Oh silly me!' Liam burst into laughter. “I moved out of that room. This is another one!”

“which room are you in Liam?” Drake hurriedly got dressed keeping the phone on speaker. Clearly Liam was drunk and he needed to talk to Drake. Drake could remember just one or two occasions when Liam got drunk. And those were not pleasant occasions to say the least. 

'I think this is the one where we had shared that blonde…. You remember?’ Liam paused as if remembering something himself.

‘Here we go…’ Drake mumbled as he rushed out of his door. He jumped two stairs at a time to reach the second floor, all the while hoping - no praying - that Liam was alone and he wouldn't say something more embarrassing.

“You had ripped her dress and she had to leave in your shirt.” Liam said as he remembered some more details of that day.

“'God! Liam I remember. Please stop.” Drake pleaded as he reached the second floor. Now what wing was that? He went to the west wing, and began opening each door one by one searching frantically for Liam.

“You remember her name?” Liam asked and paused again as if trying to remember the girl’s name. “Truly? No..Trudy? Tru… Trucy? No wait…”

“It was Tracy, Liam” Drake said as he opened a door only to find an empty room behind it.

'Oh yes! Tracy! Its funny how you remember her and not Riley.’ Liam went on. Drake closed his eyes. Please Liam don't go there, not now.

'Where the hell are you Liam?’ Drake finally opened the door of the room where Liam was sitting with a glass of whiskey in one hand and the phone in the other.

“You found me!” Liam smiled at Drake, he didn't realize that he was still holding his phone at his ears. 

“You know she is the most amaaaaazing woman. I don’t understand how you can forget her?” Drake closed the door and was thankful that the entire wing was deserted. No one had heard their king rambling in the middle of the night.

“I could never forget her, even if I try.” Liam sighed, still holding the phone on his ears.

Drake gently took the phone and kept it away. “How many bottles you had Liam?” He had to change the topic.

“You think I am drunk? I am not drunk! I just had a few glasses.” Liam took another gulp from his glass.

Drake looked at an empty bottle lying at his feet and a half bottle on the table. Oh boy! I hope he added water to that.  He looked at the glass in his hand - it was neat.

“You know, when we used to fuck all those girls - have meaningless sex with them, I never thought I would fall in love. I knew I would have to marry someone for political reasons even when I was not the Prince in line. But then I met her and everything changed.” Liam said. His eyes were not focused. He was looking at a far distance, as if he can see the past play out in front of his eyes. 

"She is amazing! There is no woman quite like her Drake! You are soooo lucky!" Liam chuckled, 'And you don’t remember her!’

Drake shook his head. "Let’s talk about this tomorrow, ok?" He didn’t want to hear this. It was - embarrassing, but more than that it was painful. The thought of hurting Liam for a girl? But then she was not just a girl, was she? He didn't knew her, but there was something about her.

'No! Tomorrow I am leaving!’ Liam exclaimed. Why was he so wasted? What led him to drink so much? Was he trying to ease a pain?

“Leaving? Where?’ Drake asked him, looking for a jug of water.

“To the world tour! I told you Drake! Keep up!” Liam said a little annoyed.

“You never told me! I was hoping to talk to you tomorrow!” Drake said.

“Oh ya! I was going next week, but change of plans!” Liam stopped to finish the rest of the drink in his glass.  “I have to leave to stop the news spreading.” Liam said placing a finger on his lips.

'What news?’ Drake asked, pouring some water in Liam’s glass, hoping he wouldn't notice that.

“that Liv and I are getting separated. I don’t want to handle it now.” Liam shook his head and started laughing. Drake looked at him - so Kiara was speaking the truth!.

“You know when we were young and could get any girl? Had no clue what the fuck love is? ’ Liam chuckled, “ you know my friend? I still have no clue!” Liam swinged his glass in a wide gesture spilling the water all around him.

“Liam!” Drake exclaimed as some of the water splashed on him too. 

“She says that I don’t love her! Do I? Don’t I?” Liam continued his ranting while Drake wiped the water clean with a washcloth.

“You are very luuuuucky, you have Riley. You should never let her go.” Liam stood up and placed a hand on Drake’s shoulder. 

“Liam, please drink this” Drake handed him a glass of water. Liam gulped down the water and try to hand the glass over to Drake, but missed by a wide angle. Drake lunged to catch the glass.

“Liam, you should sleep now” Drake pleaded, but Liam didn't hear him. He was lost in his own world.

“I failed! Twice!” Liam raised two fingers. “I am a King! A fucking King! I thought I could get any girl in the world. But I failed! Failed! Not once! But twice!’ Liam continued his ranting with wild gestures, which only made him lose his balance. Drake pulled Liam’s arm on his shoulder and dragged him to bed.  

“I gave her everything! Amaaazing sex, riches of the world, power, fucking everything! But she doesn’t care for them. I don’t know what she wants! “ Liam kept on ranting as Drake tucked him in his bed.

'Did I tell you how amazing Riley is ?’ Liam asked. 

“You did!” Drake said - A hundred times already.

'Because she is! ’ Liam continued talking, even though his eyes were closed. 'You are so lucky! Never give that up!’ his voice became low, mumbled as he finally drifted to sleep.

Drake flopped down on the chair and fixed himself a glass - Whiskey neat. I am sorry my friend. I will make this right - he thought sipping from his glass.

Now

Riley sat in her car a little anxious, a little excited while her driver drove her to the Palace from Valtoria. She was invited by Queen Olivia to discuss something. Although she had asked - Olivia didn't mention. She just asked her to meet her as soon as possible.

It had been just a week that Riley had not seen Drake, but it seemed like an eternity to her. And she didn't even hear from him. She thought about calling him, texting him, but after the few past incidents, she was not sure how he would react.  And she had realized that until and unless he decides to see her, she should not be the one imposing herself on him.

Olivia has asked her to meet in Liam’s office. As Liam was on tour, she was handling all stately affairs and it would be convenient to meet in office. 

‘Riley, I need to show you something.’ She went straight to the point after a short pleasantries.

‘I had asked Bastien to look into investigation on Drake’s accident. He brought this yesterday.’

She said turning her screen so that Riley could see the video playing on it. ‘This is a CCTV footage of Drake’s accident.’

‘How did he find it?’ Riley asked her in surprise, the police in Valtoria were not able to find much clue regarding the accident.

‘It was shot on a private CCTV camera.’ Olivia said as she played the video. ‘The CCTV was capturing the road outside the property. It showed an empty road. No traffic, just some trees on side of road. Suddenly a car comes speeding from one side, almost at the same moment, a trailer rushes from opposite side. They would have crossed , each in its own lane. But suddenly, without any apparent reason, the trailer changed lane. It was now coming straight towards the car.‘ Riley flinched and closed her eyes shut, she couldn’t look. She had recognized Drake’s car and it was about to get hit by the trailer! She opened her eyes to see the car crashed at a tree a few feet ahead.

‘Drake maneuvered his car away from the trailer the last second.’ Olivia informed her,’He had slid down the road, lost control and crashed into the tree. He had lost some speed before the crash and was wearing the seat-belt thankfully.’

‘Did the trailer …?’ deliberately changed the lane? Riley wanted to ask, but the words never left her. She knew, feared something like this was going to happen. Drake never took the threats seriously. It was not an accident. It was an attempt to murder him. A shiver ran down her spine imagining what would have happened if Drake hadn’t reacted in time.

"Yes”, Olivia knew what Riley was thinking. She had more evidence to show - to prove she was right. “Look at this” She said as she played the another CCTV footage.It showed nothing much, just an empty road and a trailer parked on side. A few cars coming and going at various intervals.

‘The trailer was parked at some distance away from your estate. It was parked about half an hour before the time Drake was scheduled to leave to meet Liam.’ She pointed at the time of recording. Olivia moved the video forward.

A car moved passed the trailer. Olivia looked at Riley to see if she recognized the car.

‘It is our car!’ Riley pointed it out, ‘The one Drake was supposed to leave in!’ She remembered that Drake had instructed his team to leave without him. He was late - because of that fight she had...

‘Yes, and after about 10 minutes, the trailer drove off.’  Olivia showed the video where trailer left the scene, pointing to the time.

‘It is as if he knew! He knew which car would be he in and when he left the estate!’ Riley looked at the footage in horror as the realization washed over her, It was an insider’s job!

Someone had tipped the driver which car would Drake be in and at what time he left! This was only possible if someone inside the estate informed him. Or if someone was staying close enough to keep a close watch.

Riley’s heart sank and beads of sweat formed on her forehead.

“Do you have any idea who could do something like this?” Olivia asked Riley. Riley looked at her, thinking - should I tell her? She had promised Drake that she would not tell anyone - not a soul. But she can trust Olivia - right? But what if someone hears them? 

Riley realized Olivia was staring at her, trying to read her thoughts. Riley shook her head - “No I don't think anyone would do such thing!”

Olivia nodded, “Don’t worry about it. You leave it to me.” She stood up from her chair, went back to the liquor cabinet and fixed two drinks for her and Riley.

She walked back to her and handed her a fruity drink. “This will help you calm your nerves”. She watched Riley hesitantly accepting the glass.’ Don't worry, it is non-alcoholic.’ She clinked her glass with hers,’Congratulations! The pregnancy glow suits you.’ Olivia said with a smirk.

‘Thank you...’ Riley looked at Olivia with wide eyes,’ you knew?’ 

‘Oh! come on Riley. Give me some credit! Your flat shoes, dresses that try to hide your belly, even your walk has changed. I am surprised how no one else has picked up on these signs!’ she said after taking a small sip from her flute.

Riley just smiled and took a sip from her drink. The cold refreshing drink calmed her nerves as it went down her throat.

‘I believe you haven't told him yet...’ but the next statement from Olivia stung her like a needle in the heart. She just shook her head, looking down at her flute. How could she? He was no longer her husband, her love. He was some stranger who didn't even know her.

‘You should.’ Olivia said in a soft voice. Riley looked up to her. Although she didn't utter a single word, Olivia could read all the questions flooding her mind like a book. ‘he deserves to know.’ Olivia said firmly, reassuring her. Riley nodded - it was time.

--

After finishing the drink, Riley took her leave from Olivia, Riley was feeling positive meeting Drake after so long. She crossed the distance between Liam’s office and Drake’s room in only a few strides. She hadn't walked so fast after learning of her pregnancy. But today she had a purpose. She had missed Drake so much the last week. She had kept her distance trying to give him some space while he had embarked a journey to find himself. She was unsure till now about whether to tell him about the baby or not, but today she had decided that it cannot wait anymore. He needs to know, now.

In her hurriedness, she didn’t even bother to knock on the door and just pushed it open. She had a smile on her face along with a bit of heavy breathing of walking so fast. But as soon as her eyes found the two persons standing in front of her, the smile on her face vanished. She froze , with embarrassment, hurt, betrayal.

For a moment, Her eyes met with Drake’s. ‘Excuse me...’ was all that she could mutter before she closed the door and ran down the corridor.

---

A few minutes before

Drake was pacing around in his room. Kiara had shown him a pic on her mobile that she had managed to capture in Liam’s office. The picture was not clear, but still the heading of the page in the picture was readable - Notice for Divorce.

‘Olivia has given Liam notice for Divorce.’ Kiara whispered, handing him the phone. She placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. He handed the phone back to Kiara.

‘Kiara, listen, there is something I need to tell you.’ Drake looked at her. Kiara had been supportive the past week and he had spent some good time talking to her. However, he had not informed her of the thing he had been working on the past week. But it was the time.

‘I…’ Kiara was looking at him so intently that the words were hard to say, ‘I am leaving’

‘You are going back to Valtoria?’ Kiara asked.She was a little disappointed by this, but she knew one day he will have to go.

‘No, I am leaving Cordonia’ he said , not meeting her eyes.

“What? Where? When? Why?” Kiara was stunned, “Are you serious?”

“Listen! I don't want anyone to know where I am going. I will make some stops before I reach my destination” he said looking at her.

“But why? This is your home!” Kiara was desperate.She wanted him, she needed him.

“Kiara, this life is not what I wanted, and I am the one hurting Liam. I think it is better I just move away from all this. That way Liam will have another chance with Riley” Drake shrugged as he kept his thumbs in his pockets.

“You don't need to go! You can leave Riley, start a new life here! You can come with me to my dutchy.”

“Kiara, ‘ Drake looked into her eyes,’You are an incredible woman, smart, beautiful, a good friend. I admire you, very much. But I am sorry, I don’t have feelings for you. I don’t remember what we had… but you deserve true love. You deserve someone who can love you completely. Not treat you as an escape!”

“Listen, Drake! Please don't make any hasty decisions. Think this through, please”  she moved closer to him, raised her hand to cup his face.

“Drake, I need you” her eyes pleaded as she placed another hand on his shoulder. Her body flush against him. She brushed her thumb on his lips. “Please don't leave me.” she whispered.

“Kiara,” Drake moved her hand gently from his face, “I am sorry, but I can’t do this. This relationship was never fair to you. I should have never done this.” he shook his head and looked in Kiara’s eyes,” I am not worthy of you. “

“We can start fresh. You are leaving your wife, we can finally be together. Please don't leave me.” She didn't wanted him leave. He cannot leave! She must stop him!

Kiara knew her words won't change his decision. She was so desperate to stop him from leaving that she pressed her lips to his. Her hands moved behind his neck, pulling him close. Drake moved his hands to her waist, trying to gently push her back to break the kiss when he heard the door open.

Kiara must have heard that too, because she broke the kiss and turned to look at the door. At the door was Riley looking at them, color flushed from her face. Drake felt a pain in his heart as he saw the hurt in her eyes.

“Excuse me…” she murmured before closing the door shut.

Disclaimer: The characters belong to Pixelberry. 

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[bbyboybrock--archived]

Serendipity (C.B) | Chapter 23

Summary: Serendipity: (n) the chance occurrence of events in a beneficial way

Popular youtuber Isabella Hart, known as Bella to her audience, bends over backwards to separate her youtube life from her private life. Known for her overall clean content and her bubbly attitude, Isabella has a wild side to her that only those inside the youtube community know about. When Bella meets Colby during one of the trap house parties she finally meets someone she can be her genuine self with. When trouble arises after their meeting, will Bella be able to hand the pressure or will she destroy her relationship with Colby as well as herself in the process. [This starts in 2018]

Written: 2019

Word Count: 5,755

Warnings: swearing

Serendipity Masterlist

I sit on a chair on the balcony drinking my coffee waiting for Colby to get out of the shower. It's early. Early enough for me to wear a hoodie out. I watch as people go on about their lives down below. People going to work, school, or just being pass by the complex. It's a Thursday so people are getting for the weekend. And this weekend is the first weekend of Coachella so nearly everyone in LA is preparing for that. Our friend group included.

Well, not everyone in our friend group. Its's literally just Sam, Colby, Jake, Kat, Tara, Griffin, and me. Tara is the newest addition to our group. She's not apart of the girlfriend club yet but I'm sure Jake will take care of that soon. Sam, Colby, and I are going because we have to work. Which kind of messes with their break. But they have to make money somehow.

We're not going until weekend two but Colby and I have no idea what we're wearing. Sam and Kat have been ready for at least a week. Jake is going to just wear normal Jake clothes. Tara has been planning and I'm sure she sent Jake a color scheme so something could match. And even though Colby has some sense of style, he claims that he has no idea how to dress. So I promised him that when I had a free day. I would put together both of our outfits. With the album release party and the actual release of the album, I've been busy until today. Which leads us to right now.

Sitting on the balcony drinking coffee and waiting for Colby to get out if the shower. My phone rings. I take a large sip before answering.

"Hello?"

"Happy birthday!" Yells the person the other end. I pull the phone away from my ear for a second and blink. I look at the caller id.

"Benji, it's way too fucking early for this. The caffeine hasn't even kicked in. But thank you." I finish my coffee and head back inside. I peek in the hallway on my way to the kitchen and see that Colby has finally gotten out of the shower.

"Wow, the birthday girl woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning."

"Sorry, just not in the mood... to celebrate." I begin washing the cup and keeping my eyes on the bathroom door.

"What the fuck do you mean? It's your 20th birthday! You're celebrating."

"Not this year, okay? Don't you have a class or a shift at the hospital or something?"

"I get it! I'll see you later. I have to drop off your gift."

"Wait! Benji do—" Benji hangs up on the other before I can tell him to not come over. I roll my eyes and text him quickly before sitting on the couch.

It's not that I don't want to celebrate my birthday. I always do. Even when my family ignored me, I always planned something for me to do and spent time with Benji. Hell, last year was the first year I did something other than for and spend time with Benji for my birthday. But this year is different. Everything happened close to my birthday. Colby isn't back to normal. I know he isn't happy. If I hadn't already planned my album release party a few weeks ago, I would have kept my mouth shut about it. I don't want to put Colby into situations where he has to force himself to seem happy. I couldn't do anything about the album release party. I kept telling him he didn't have to do, but he insisted. I don't want my birthday to be another boyfriend obligation. So I kept quiet about my birthday around everyone, hoping that maybe everyone will forget. I'm assuming the did because there have been no texts or social media post from my friends. Colby didn't say anything this morning.

Colby finally walks out of the bathroom. He disappears into the bedroom.

"You ready to go?" Colby asks after grabbing a pair of shoes from the bedroom.

"I've been ready. I aged five years waiting for you." I joke.

"Hey, you don't understand this, but beauty takes time."

"Okay, beast. Let's go before all the last minute weekend one people get the last of the good stuff." Colby helps me up and we head to the mall.

In the car I ordered custom shirts for Colby and I. They're redesigned fashion logos. Calvin Klein for Colby and Gucci for me. Right now we're inside Forever 21 browsing. We've already been to a few stores and found some things to wear. We decided to wear similar "matching" outfits. Mainly, we're going to stick to similar color schemes.

I'm looking through a rack of neon shorts to go with the neon yellow pants we found for Colby. As I finally find a pair in my size, Colby's phone rings. I can already tell it's Sam based on the ring tone. He has special ring tones for Sam, his parents, and me.

"Hello? Sam?" Colby looks at me confused before handing me the clothes in his hands and walking out of the store. Lucky for me, he's holding the shopping bags.

I watch him as he talks to Sam. He pulls the phone away from his ear for a second, looks at something, and then goes back to talking to Sam. I figure whatever is going on with Sam is going to take a while and go deeper into the store. I find a few more things that I like and just look through them. I go through a few more racks like that before Colby finally gets back.

"What was that about?" I ask while handing Colby back his clothes.

"Oh, it was nothing. He had gotten some emails about the Sam and Colby channel. He needed my opinion on somethings. Anyway, since we're on the last outfit, why don't we head to lunch soon. Then we can walk around the mall some more or walk around the beach."

"Yeah, okay. Let's try these on first and then we can head out. Oh, here, we're not going to buy these shirts but try it with this so I can see if it works." I hand Colby a white shirt as we walk to the dressing rooms.

We ended up getting Chick-Fil-A and walked around the beach. We spent the whole day out and even did a bit more shopping. When we got home, Colby managed to convince me to go out again. We haven't really had a date night in a while, so he said that we should go to dinner. Which is where we are now, sitting outside of Tao's in the car about to go in for dinner. The idea of us just spending the day together is nice. However, Colby spent more time on his phone all day than talking to me. Which is a bit annoying, but hopefully, he'll pry himself away from his phone for dinner.

Colby helps me out of the car and we walk into the restaurant. We get to the front counter and the waitress leads us to a party room full of our friends and Benji.

"Surprise!" Everyone screams in unison.

"Oh shit... Thank you! I really am surprised. Colbs did you...?" I turn to Colby and see that he's smiling.

"Happy birthday, baby." He kisses me before leading us to our seats. I'm sitting at the head of the table with Colby on one side of me and Benji on the other.

"I honestly, don't know what to say. This is really a surprise. I had no idea you guys had this planned." I say after taking a sip of water.

"What? Did you think we forgot or something?" Sam jokes. I see a look of panic flash across Colby's face.

"No, it's just, I wasn't really planning on celebrating this year. But this is great. I've never had a surprise party before."

"Let's look at the menu. Izzy, we can go half and half on something if you want." Colby says quickly handing me a menu.

That's when I knew that they did forget. The Colby forgot and right now he's forcing himself to be a perfect boyfriend and he's beating himself up over it.

****

Sam and I pose for pictures with the fans who happened to find out at the mall. Once we finish I wipe off the fake smile and continue walking with Sam. The only reason why we're at the mall is because Sam wanted to get a surprise for Kat and he needed a girl's opinion. I was hoping that we wouldn't run into fans today but it's only a matter of time before rumors start spreading around the two of us. Which is fine. Colby knows that I'm hanging out with Sam today and why. The only person who doesn't know is Kat, and that's the point. But I also have another reason to hang out with Sam.

We sit down at the food court and start eating the food we bought right before we got interrupted. Sam set's Kat's gift on the floor and starts setting out all the food.

"Can't wait for that to blowback on us later," Sam says as he passes me my food.

"Well, we couldn't have said no or asked them to not post the pictures. It would make the situation worse. Anyways, they're harmless selfies with fans. If they speculate, we can't stop them. We know the truth." I take a picture of our food and caption it for my story.

"Very true. Hey, thanks for helping me today. I wanted to make sure that Kat likes her gift. And since you two hang out all the time, I thought you would be the best person to help." Sam pops a fry into his mouth.

"No problem. Since I helped you out, can you give me advice on something?"

"Shoot."

"You talked to Kat about everything that happened, right?" I sip my soda and avoid eye contact with him.

"Yeah, pretty much right after everything happened. As soon as I saw her. Why?"

"Well, you know Colby. Hell, I know Colby. He doesn't talk about anything when the subject is him. Which is fine, everyone is entitled to their secrets. But— Have you noticed anything different about him?"

"You mean the drinking?" He says casually.

"It's gotten out of control, Sam. I'm scared for him. I guess what I'm asking is, should I talk to him about everything?"

"Look, I know from experience that if you try to force Colby to talk, he's going to push you away."

"But, Sam—"

"Trust me, Isabella. Colby will talk about it when he's ready. You wanted my advice. My advice is to let him be for now."

"You're right. Just forget I said anything. Let's change the subject."

"Okay, so for pizza night tomorrow..."

I get home from hanging out with Sam about an hour later. When I get home, Colby is up in the balcony doing something on his computer. He's most likely working. I know that he's going to have a guys night with Mike, Aryia, and Kevin. So it would make sense that he would be working on something.

"I'm home and I brought you food!" I shout as I put the things I just bought in our room. I walk back to the kitchen and arrange Colby's food on a plate. I bring everything up to him and set it on the table.

"Thank you. How was your little shopping spree with Sam?" Colby saves his work and turns to me.

"It was fun. I haven't hung out with Sam or anyone else really since before the album release party. In fact, my manager called me while I was out. Turns out that a producer or something called him and wants to meet with Mike, Aryia, Kat, and I tomorrow morning. Anyway, how was your day?"

"That's amazing! Yeah! I've been sitting here working all day. Honestly, at this point, I'm thinking about hiring Reggie to edit my videos. That would give me more time plan and film. I really need this guys night tonight." He starts looking

"Want me to edit for you?" I say peeking at his screen.

"No, it's fine. I know you have your own stuff to work on. I know you've been working on your second album.

"Okay. Just call me if you want to take up my offer. Enjoy your lunch." I kiss Colby on the cheek before walking back into my studio.

I sit in the living room watching tv. Well, I'm not really watching it. It's on, but my mind is elsewhere. It's nearly midnight and I should be in bed because I have to be up early for my meeting. Colby is still out, which is fine. Except, Colby left at six and he said he would be back, at the latest, at eleven. It's eleven fifty and I haven't even heard from him. I know he's out with Mike, Aryia, and Kevin. The four of them together is asking for trouble when it comes to partying. The thing is, Mike and Aryia are also going to the meeting so they should be home too. I called all four of them and got nothing. I even texted Sam, who stayed home because he's working on the new series for the duo channel all night. He hasn't heard anything either and he said he'd let me know if he found anything out.

So now I'm sitting up freaking the hell out. I cleaned the apartment three times today. The first time was general house cleaning after Colby left. The second time was at ten because I was nervous about the meeting. The third time was at eleven when I saw that Colby was late and he didn't even text me. To make matters worse, his location is either broken or he turned it off because I can't check.

As I check my phone again, Sam starts to call me. I quickly answer and turn off the tv.

"Hey, have you heard from them?" I ask calmly.

"He's at my place. He's fine... just drunk." Sam says quietly. I hear a noise in the background. It sounds like Colby.

"Why's he over there? We literally live next door."

"I know. He's a mess and didn't want to go home. I think he should crash over here tonight. Listen, Iz, I was wrong."

"What are you talking about? Wrong about what and why doesn't he want to come home?" I stand up and start slowly putting the remote back in its place.

"This morning I said to leave Colby alone. I think you should talk to him."

"Why? What's happening? Sam, you're scaring me."

"Look, I have to go. Don't worry too much. I can take care of him. Just go to bed. I'll talk to you at tomorrow." Sam hangs up before I can say anything else.

It takes every fiber in my body to stop myself from going to Sam's apartment to see what's going on. Instead, I grab my phone and drag myself to bed. I plug my phone in and turn off the lights before crawling into bed. I take Colby's pillows and force them into a position to make me feel like I'm not sleeping alone. I try to fall asleep, but instead, I map out what I'm going to say to Colby. I'm going to talk to him tomorrow. I have to, for his sake.

****

"Oh! Colby, I was going to stop by Sam's to say bye to you. I have that meeting. My ride isn't here yet, do you want me to make you a hangover smoothie?" I ask as I see Colby laying on our couch. I honestly don't know when he came in. He's still wearing his clothes from yesterday. His hair looks like a tangled mess and under his eyes are so dark that he looks sick.

"No, I'm good. The sound from the blender will make it worse. Thanks though." I stand there for a second, thinking if I should bring it up right now. I go into the bathroom and take the Advil bottle and grab a cup of water from the kitchen.

"Here," I hand Colby two pills and the glass.

"Thank you. You're an angel." Colby sits up and takes the pills.

"I know that I'm leaving any minute, but can we talk?" I sit down next to Colby.

"Of course." He sets the glass on the floor and turns to me. The bags under his eyes are prominent.

"Look, I know that things have been off since you got arrested and the tunnel incident. And I haven't been pushing you to talk because I wanted to give you space. And I've noticed that you haven't been the best lately and I really want to help you."

"What do you mean by I'm not the best lately? Like I've been a shitty boyfriend?"

"What? No! That's not what I mean at all. I just meant that lately, you've been less like yourself. You go to bed later than normal. I don't even think you sleep some nights. And when you do sleep, you're having nightmares. I know you're on the balcony drinking and listening to music. Hell, you've been drinking a lot more recently. Don't think I haven't noticed the vodka supply going down. Which is what I drink when shit's hit the fan and I want to feel good. And that's how you use vodka too. I know whiskey is your poison so don't start there. And you got so drunk yesterday that you didn't want to come home. Sam told me. But don't get mad at him because he's just worried about you too. We all are."

"Do you guys have a group chat or something where you talk about me?"

"You're trying to change the subject. I get that this might be uncomfortable for you but I'm trying to help you. Like how you helped me. But I don't know how to help you. Do you want to talk about it? Do you want for us to put a pause on our relationship so that you can focus on your mental health? Whatever you need, I'll help you do it. I just want you to be happy, Colby."

"Oh, I get it." Colby laughs to himself a little.

"What are you talking about?"

"I totally get it. Why do you always suggest breaking up or taking a break when things go bad? It's because you're looking for a way out. For years you were this party girl that didn't settle down. You literally had a different dick, every night and now you're stuck with me. You tested the whole relationship thing out with me and decided that it's not for you but you don't want to hurt me. You probably want to go back to how things were before."

"Why are you being an asshole right now? I'm just trying to help you." My phone starts to ring. I search for it in my bag and mute it.

"Help me? Really? Are you sure you're not trying to help yourself? You're making something out of nothing and saying that we should take a break. I'm starting to think that you don't actually love me. You pretended to be asleep when I first said it and waited a week before saying anything about it."

"Are you kidding me right now? I don't love you? Are you serious? If I didn't love you, I wouldn't have said it at all. I wouldn't have written a whole ass song saying how much I love you. I would 't have given up my apartment to move in with you. For fuck's sakes, I would be wearing the promise ring that you gave me if I didn't love you! I'm not the one making something out of nothing. What is wrong with you?" My phone starts ringing again and I quickly press mute. I need to hear this.

Colby sits silently for a few seconds. Thinking. I can almost see the gears turning in his brain.

"I cheated on you."

"Excuse me?" I stood up quickly. I suddenly don't want to be sitting next to Colby anymore.

"Last night. When I was at the club I cheated on you with some random chick. That's why I didn't want to come home. Not because I was drunk off my ass. I mean, I was really drunk but that was after."

"I-I don't believe you. You're lying. You're trying to hurt me or push me away instead of dealing with your problems. I do not believe that you cheated on me."

"Isabella, listen to me—" My phone rings for the third time and I finally answer it.

"Hello?" I stare at Colby in disbelief.

"Izzy, we're here. Get your ass downstairs or we're going to be late for the meeting." Mike says on the other end.

"Sorry, I'll be down in a minute." I hang up the phone and shove it in my pocket.

"Isabella, I'm telling the truth." Colby tries to touch my hand but I pull it back.

"I refuse to believe that you cheated on me. You can't just accuse me of not loving you and then blurt out that you fucking cheated. Whatever is wrong with you, better be worth hurting me and hurting me, you asshole. Mike, Aryia, and Kat are waiting for me downstairs so I'm going to go to my meeting. While I'm going, you better think about what you need in order for me to help you and we'll deal with it when I get home." I hesitate before kissing Colby on the cheek and leaving the apartment.

****

A tour. That's what the meeting was about. At my album release party a couple of weeks ago, people from the music industry were there. They liked how Mike, Aryia, Kat, and I put the show together. They like it so much they told their bosses about us. They want to put on a smallish tour with the four of us around the country so we can get exposure and build up our momentum. Not a record deal, but a tour that can lead to being signed with a label. An actual dream come true.

Except, I couldn't be as excited at I would normally be for something like this. I had to fake it during the meeting. I had to fake my enthusiasm for something that I feel genuinely excited about. All because I couldn't stop thinking about this morning.

Colby said he cheated on me. Part of me doesn't believe him. Part of me believes that he only said that so I would only hate him for being a cheater instead of an asshole for what he said just before that. Another part of me thinks he might be telling the truth. That last night, when he went out with Mike, Aryia, and Kevin, Colby met some random girl and made the decision to sleep with her. Drunk or not, Colby made that decision knowing that one day I would find out and it would devastate me.

I came home to the apartment empty. Meaning, that somewhere in Los Angles, Colby is avoiding the next conversation we need to have. Which prompts me with two things to do. I walk into the kitchen and go straight for the alcohol stash. We keep the bottles in the bottom cupboard near the sink. I pull all of them out and open a bottle of vodka and hold it over the sink. I hesitate to pour it out. Getting rid of the alcohol won't do anything. He can just go out and buy more or just spend more time at clubs. If anything, it would just make him hate me. Instead, I pour myself a glass and put all the bottles back.

I take my cup and walk into our bedroom. I grab my suitcases from the closet and start shoving all my clothes and shoes in them. After filling both I drag them to my studio room. I'm not going to leave Colby. I wouldn't just pack up my things and leave without at least talking to him. But, based on his lack of being home when we need to talk, our relationship might be on the line. Regardless of what gets decided, I'm going to be sleeping in my studio for a while. I grab my pillows from my side of the bed and one of our extra blankets. I set them on my couch and just sit down with my vodka and phone.

I just drink and stare at my phone. I could check his location. We always have each other's location turned on. But I don't want to see that he's somewhere he shouldn't be or that he turned his location off. Instead, I send Colby a text asking where he is and then put my phone away. I finish my drink and lay down. I stare at the ceiling.

It's the only place in the entire room that has nothing on it. The wall where my couch is has posters and fan art, the backdrop for most of my sit down videos. Directly across from that are my instruments. All my string instrument neatly displayed and easily accessible with my piano under them. The wall where my computer and desks are is completely made from windows. I turned the closet into a makeshift recording studio. The room Colby I could have to work. The room that Colby and I could have easily shared but he insisted on giving it to me. The ceiling is bare. Not that I couldn't put anything up there. Colby and I were going to make it into a project. A mural or something that's dangling down. But for now, it stares back at me as white and bare as the rest of the walls in the apartment. If it wasn't for the XPLR tapestry and the row of Colby cutouts, the entire apartment would be bare. Just like my ceiling.

The living room was Colby's space. That's where he films so he could decorate it how he chooses. But he didn't and that suits him. Our bedroom is a mixture of both of us. Colby even has some posts it's up because he liked the prank Sam did to him at the trap house. I have some of my art pieces up. I didn't like how we had the apartment set up. It felt too much like we had our two separate spaces.

But the more time I spent here with Colby, the more the apartment started to feel like home. Colby feels like home, but right now, the home's been broken into and I don't even know where to start to get everything back in order.

"Izzy? Are you okay?" I feel a hand on my shoulder. I slowly open my eyes to see Kat standing over me.

"What are you doing here? What time is it?" I sit up and start stretching.

"It's six-thirty. Everyone's at Sam's for pizza night. You didn't show up so I asked Colby for your apartment key. Are you okay? You look like you've been crying?" Kat sits down next to me. I touch my face. It's dry but I can feel dried tears.

"Colby is over there? Right now?" I get up and walk into the bathroom to wash my face.

"Yeah, he came a little bit ago. When he came without you, it seemed a bit sus so I asked for his key to see if you were still here. Are you okay, Iz?" Kat leans across the door frame for the bathroom?

"Is he fine? How did he seem?" I grab my toothbrush out of the cup and quickly start brushing.

"Isabella, forget about Colby for a second. Are you okay?"

"Katrina, I'm fine. If you keep asking I'm not going to be fine anymore. I'm just worried about Colby because he flaked on me earlier and I haven't seen him since this morning."

"Is something wrong with you two?"

"Everything is not fine between us. And no, I don't want to talk about it right now because I don't want to go to pizza night with even puffier eyes. I promise, when this situation is figured out, I'll tell you first. Can you help me look decent? My clothes are in the suitcases in my studio."

"Yeah, I can do that." While Kat disappears I finish brushing my teeth and dry my face. I dig through my make up and grab a few things out. I don't have time to do a full face so I just put on lipstick, my eyelids, and try to take care of under my eyes. Kat comes back with fishnets, shorts, and an oversized band tee shirt and gives them to me.

After I finish getting dressed Kat and I make our way over to Sam's where everyone is just mingling and having a good time. Colby is in the corner talking to Reggie about something. We make eye contact for a brief moment before he quickly looks away. I plaster on a fake smile before going to greet everyone.

"Okay, they're back! We can talk about it now!" Mike yells to get everyone's attention.

"Tell them what?" I ask as I grab two slices of pizza and a can of mountain dew.

"They were asking about the meeting. Mike was going to tell them earlier when they asked but I went to get you so you could be here." Kat explains to me.

"Okay, one of you spill it then," Kevin speaks up.

"We met with some people in the industry who wants to... put the four of us on tour, together!" Aryia exclaims from the couch.

"Yeah, they were at Izzy's album release party and like how we put the show together," Kat said now standing next to Sam.

"It's not like a full-blown tour like Ariana Grande. It's more like what they did with Viners. Kind of like MagCon and that other one, digital something. Except, instead of one or two actual talent acts and a bunch of shirtless teenage boys flipping around on stage, they get four real performers. No offense to Sam and Colby." I joke as I sit on the couch. Colby comes over and joins me. He puts his arm around me and I stiffen. Everyone else continues talking about the tour and asking questions. The whole time I just count the minutes until pizza night is over

Colby and I are one of the first people to leave Sam's apartment. I didn't want to leave early. Normally we're one of the last to leave. But Colby said he was tired so I followed.

"Colby, we need to talk," I say after locking the front door.

"Can't we just save it for tomorrow? I'm exhausted." Colby is near the bedroom.

"No, because if we do, you'll just disappear in the morning before I wake up. And then I probably won't see you until bedtime. And I can't do that again." I slowly walk to the couch and sit down. Colby hesitates before finally joining me. This time he keeps his distance.

"For the record, I wouldn't have skipped out on you like that." He runs his hands through his hair. His partly blue hair that he dyed before we went to Coachella.

"Frankly, after today, I don't think I believe you. Look, Colby, I know that I shouldn't have bombarded you this morning and pressured you into making a decision. But given the circumstances, you're going to have to make a decision."

"Why are you talking like that? You're stressing me out more. And yeah, I was a bit overwhelmed this morning, but I can't make that decision. Not right now." I watch as he fidgets with his rings.

"You have to. I can't just sit here and watch you suffer. You're going down the same path that I was going to and that can only lead to— I don't know how you did it but I can't lose you. Not like that. I'm willing to help you, but you have to allow me. So, there are two questions that need to be answered. First, how can I help you get better?" I watch as Colby thinks. We stay silent for a seconds before Colby runs his hand through his hair again.

"I don't want to break up. But I don't need any special help. I'll talk to you about everything. Maybe that'll help. Just you being there, that'll help."

"Okay, then I'll be here. You can talk to me whenever about whatever. I'll be here to listen. And anything else you need to get you better."

"Well, that's settled. What about the second question?" Colby is even more nervous than he was earlier. Because he knows what the next question is going to be.

"Did you really cheat on me?"

"No," he answers quickly, "but I thought about it. I was close to doing it, but I didn't."

"What do you mean by close? Did you choose a girl? Were you about to go to her place?"

"We were in the bathroom and at the literal last second before I could do any real damage, I backed out."

"You— I can't believe this. And you dared to accuse me of not loving you anymore when you went and did that. You know what? I may be stupid for doing this but, I'll stay to help you. I'll stay with you but you're on thin fucking ice. For now, I'm staying in my office."

"That's ridiculous, I'll take the couch. You can stay in the bedroom."

"No, the room smells like you and I'm mad at you right now. Let's just go to bed. We can talk in the morning." I get up from the couch and start walking to my office. I reach the door before turning around. Colby is still on the couch with his head in his hands.

"Oh, and Colby?"

"Yeah?" He slowly lifts his head and looks me in the eyes. They're watery.

"I love you."

"I love you too." I smile softly before disappearing into the room.

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[your-dietician]

15 years ago, 'Rock Star: Supernova' rocked reality television

New Post has been published on https://tattlepress.com/entertainment/15-years-ago-rock-star-supernova-rocked-reality-television/

15 years ago, 'Rock Star: Supernova' rocked reality television

Gillby Clarke, ‘Rock Star: Supernova’ winmer Lukas Rossi, Tommy Lee, and Jason Newsted in 2006. (Photo: Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images)

Before David Cook became the first rock winner of American Idol or Adam Lambert made TV history with his game-changing, Jeff Buckley-esque “Ring of Fire” cover, there was CBS’s Rock Star: Supernova — a search for the lead singer for a new supergroup comprising Mötley Crüe drummer Tommy Lee, ex-Metallica bassist Jason Newsted, and ex-Guns N’ Roses guitarist Gilby Clarke. (Lambert even credited Rock Star: Supernova runner-up Dilana’s “Ring of Fire” performance as an inspiration for his Idol arrangement.) 

The Dave Navarro-cohosted talent show, which premiered 15 years ago on July 5, 2006, was an “anti-Idol” of course, featuring covers of songs by Nirvana, the Verve, Hole, Radiohead, the Killers, Dramarama, Pink Floyd, R.E.M., Depeche Mode, the Kinks, Living Colour, Failure, Franz Ferdinand, the Police, Talking Heads, Cheap Trick, Bob Dylan, Soul Asylum, Stone Temple Pilots, Jimi Hendrix, David Bowie, and even the actual Jeff Buckley — at a time when that was unheard-of on all other singing competitions.

“It was real. It wasn’t like karaoke with somebody up there just singing some dumb s***. It was real music,” Lee tells Yahoo Entertainment. “I really think [Rock Star: Supernova executive producer] Mark Burnett was way ahead of his time in wanting to deliver that kind of thing to prime-time America. Like, ‘Here’s some real s***. These guys are going to look for a singer. They’re going to make a record. They’re going to go on tour.’ … It totally was ahead of its time.”

The blueprint for Rock Star: Supernova was arguably created a year earlier with Rock Star: INXS, a questionable and somewhat distasteful reality show set up by Burnett and the surviving members of Australian pop-rock band INXS to replace late INXS frontman Michael Hutchence. (Another future American Idol rock trailblazer, Chris Daughtry, actually unsuccessfully auditioned for that show.) Canadian glam-rocker Lukas Rossi eventually won Rock Star: Supernova after performing his self-penned original power ballad “Headspin” on the finale (which, again, was not typical for reality shows of the era), but he tells Yahoo Entertainment/SiriusXM Volume that when his friend suggested he try out for Burnett’s new Rock Star spinoff, he balked — because initially, Rock Star Season 2 was going to be a search for the replacement singer of another big, established rock group, not for the singer of a brand-new band.

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“My life seemed pretty grim at that point. I was in Montreal, going from friends’ to friends’ houses and trying to get my band, Rise Electric, off the ground. I was literally in minus-40-degree weather, living in an abandoned bowling alley and covering myself up with newspaper just to keep warm. I got a call out of the blue from a friend of mine, [EMI Music Publishing executive] Barb Sedun, and she was like, ‘Hey, there’s this show and they’re looking for a singer.’ And she mentioned another band. I was like, ‘I can’t replace that singer! That’s just not right!’ … It was Van Halen — that’s what she said to me. And I was like, ‘Absolutely not. I don’t want to pretend to be their new singer.’ I mean, I love Van Halen, but that’s just not my persona. I’d be lying to the fans and their fans and to myself.”

Rossi was homeless and destitute after leaving his home base of Toronto following a breakup with a cheating girlfriend, and he had focused all his energy on the fledgling Rise Electric. “I put all my eggs into one basket, because I’m a firm believer. My daddy used to say, ‘Whaddya got for plan B, after all this music s***?’ And I’m like, ‘If you need a plan B, that means your plan A is pretty s***ty, dude.’ So, I didn’t have a plan B. Or a plan C.” Still, Rossi admits that he was tempted to try out for what he believed was going to be Rock Star: Van Halen. “It was a hard freakin’ pill to swallow, because I was frickin’ broke, dude. I had nothing.”

However, a week later Sedun phoned Rossi again to let him know that Rock Star had changed direction, and its second season would instead center on a new hard-rock supergroup featuring A-list musicians, with superstar producer Butch Walker set to record their album. “I was like, ‘Hell yeah, dude! That’s what I was like!’” When Rossi had no way of affording a trip to the nearest audition city, Vancouver, Canada, Sedun footed the bill. “She’s like, ‘I’ll pay for you to get there. Just go and kick ass. I know you can do this. I believe in you.’ I packed up my backpack — I had all my belongings in a backpack — and I went there, terrified.”

Rossi confesses that he “drank a few too many pints” before he tried out with “Headspin” (which he’d written just a week earlier) and Live’s “Lightning Crashes,” and he initially thought he’d ruined his chances. “I was so nervous. I walk in, and there’s this dark room. It’s like really weird, like this little stage lit up with one light and the rest is this empty theater,” he recalls. “And then halfway through that I hear, ‘Why are you sweating so much?’ I was like, ‘Who said that?’ I’m looking around, and then I see Jason Newsted through the darkness. And I said, ‘Oh, hey, dude. I just had a couple of pints and it’s hot as s*** in here. That light above me is hot, dude!’”

Apparently the skunk-haired Rossi’s rock ‘n’ roll attitude — which likely would not have impressed the stuffier powers-that-be on, say, Idol or America’s Got Talent in 2006 — was an asset on Rock Star: Supernova. “There was a chuckle in the darkness,” Rossi remembers. Moments after he left that audition and started walking down the street with his guitar case in hand, a casting agent from the show chased him down and invited him to return the next day. And even later, when Rossi got on the show and botched his live, televised performance of Hole’s “Celebrity Skin” — when his “brain took a big dookie” and he forgot the words — that rawness and authenticity worked in his favor. “When you take your life too seriously, man, that only goes so far. That’s, like, a real person. [Rock musicians] trip over things once in a while. We do things wrong. You have to be yourself,” Rossi shrugs. 

Unfortunately, the Rossi-fronted band that formed after the show’s finale was not nearly as successful as the show itself. First, there was a branding issue when the new group, which was supposed to be called Supernova, had to officially change its name to the clunkier Rock Star Supernova (minus the TV series title’s colon), after an established Orange County pop-punk trio named Supernova sued and was granted an injunction. (One key piece of evidence was a Myspace message from Butch Walker noting that Burnett Productions, CBS, Lee, Newsted, and Clarke had been informed that another Supernova already existed, but they had proceeded anyway.) 

The hastily renamed Rock Star Supernova’s surprisingly solid, Walker-produced self-titled album, which included “Headspin” as a single and featured Rossi’s writing credits on four other cuts, debuted at No. 4 in Rossi’s native Canada, where it eventually went platinum. (Check out two circa-2006 performances by the band at Yahoo’s studio below.) But in the U.S., the album stalled at No. 101 on the Billboard 200 and received virtually no radio airplay. It was likely that the reality-television stigma hurt Rock Star Supernova’s chances of being taken seriously in the hard rock world, despite the project’s A-list pedigree.

“I think a lot of people think it’s baggage, like it is not ‘authentic’ or whatever, like it’s the ‘Hollywood TV version’ of something,” Walker, who also appeared as a guest judge on the show, tells Yahoo Entertainment/SiriusXM Volume. “But that being said, I mean, that’s what people sign up for when they watch.”

“We toured everywhere, all the way to Australia and back, but I’m a firm believer that timing is everything, you know?” muses Rossi. “And honestly, I don’t know, because I went out there every single night and gave it my all, dude. Me and Tommy were hungry, but maybe the rest of them — I’m not gonna mention people — but maybe somebody wanted Dilana to win instead of me. We’ll just leave it at that.”

Dilana, who toured as Rock Star Supernova’s opening act in 2007, was actually happy and relieved to place second on the show, as she ultimately didn’t think she was the right fit for the supergroup’s music. “I wanted to get as far as I could, but after I heard their first original, I was kind of bummed,” she confesses to Yahoo Entertainment. “That was exactly when I knew: ‘I don’t want to be the singer in this band.’ I’m not dissing them — I mean, they’re great songs, and Butch Walker is a fantastic, amazing, creative artist — but they’re just not me. They picked me to be the first [contestant] to sing an original on the show, and it was a challenge for me. After that, I knew there was no way I would be in this band, singing this material. And I made the mistake by actually informing some people about it the night before the finale.

“Someone posed the question, ‘What are you going to say [if you win]? What’s your little speech going to be?’ And, I said, ‘Well, if I win it, I’m going to decline it,’” Dilana continues. “Everyone knew it was either Lukas or I, so I said, ‘Lukas, you’re going to get it.’ And I think they were videotaping us at that point. So, I have a sneaky suspicion that somehow the producers got word to the band, and maybe they decided to make sure that I didn’t get picked. … Maybe they told the band and the band was like, ‘We’re not going to get humiliated like that.’ But, maybe the TV people were like, ‘Oh, this would be great television!’ Who knows what happened? But everyone also knew that Lukas was definitely Tommy’s favorite from day one, so it worked out perfectly for me. I didn’t have to embarrass anybody, I didn’t have to get kind of nervous if I had won, and I got exactly what I wanted. I wanted the exposure, and that’s what I got.”

“There was a lot of people involved. There were a lot of cooks in the kitchen. Everybody had their own manager. I mean, you can just see how that’s going to go,” sighs Walker. “There were a lot of people trying to get squeezed through the same rathole with all of their ideas. But they were all great people. I really enjoyed the experience, and Mark Burnett is awesome.”

Rossi was disappointed when Rock Star Supernova lasted only one album/touring cycle, but like Dilana, he used the exposure to further his solo career, and he and Lee remain buddies to this day. (“He’s the best dude. He’s like my tall, skinny daddy. I love that dude,” Rossi gushes.) Most recently, Rossi sang two tracks on Lee’s 2020 solo album Andro, the original “You Dancy” and a cover of Prince’s “When You Were Mine.” And Rock Star: Supernova changed Rossi’s life in a more important and lasting way: Shortly after the show, Lee and Navarro fixed him up with their friend, former adult film actress Kendra Jade. “We met up at Barney’s Beanery and literally spent the next two whole weeks in bed. It was mental,” Rossi laughingly recalls of their first date. Lukas and Kendra eloped in 2007; adopted a son, Bryden, in 2015; and now happily reside in Nashville. 

“The music was secondary [to the Rock Star: Supernova experience]. Everybody I’ve met through that whole journey was so awesome,” Rossi adds. “Like I was telling you, I was on the street, I had nothing, and all of a sudden I get thrown into meeting all these wonderful people. … We were all there to do what we love most. Plus, we got to have free drinks and be on television and make a bunch of wonderful, wonderful fans. I mean, God, it was the best time of my life.”

Tommy Lee and Lukas Rossi (Photo: Jordan Strauss/WireImage)

“That’s all it ever was to be — it was a great experience,” says Lee. Rossi does wish that Burnett had continued focusing on rock ‘n’ roll reality shows instead of moving on to the more mainstream and less rockin’ NBC show The Voice (“Why? That’s like McDonald’s cutting off their Big Macs,” he quips), but Lee does believe that Rock Star: Supernova changed music television 15 years ago, attesting: “I think it paved the way for a lot of the shows that are here today, definitely.”

Read more from Yahoo Entertainment:

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This above Lukas Rossi and Butch Walker interviews are taken from their appearances on the SiriusXM show “Volume West.” Full audio of those conversations are available via the SiriusXM app.

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