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ssamie · 3 years

Text

epilogue. “your girlfriend’s kinda hot”

kozume kenma x fem dazai!reader

(bsd x hq)

tw: mentions of suicide and suggestive themes + dirty jokes

masterlist. suicide freak!

"hey uh, welcome to my stream i guess" he said as he spared the camera a quick glance "im not really playing tonight because an incident has recently occurred in this household" kenma said with a tired sigh

nobody else knew it, but the said 'incident' was y/n accidentally setting half of their living room on fire

the reason? apparently, she wanted to try burning herself to death in the furnace. obviously, it didn't work. and all that's left from that is more shit for kenma to clean up and a trip to yosano-san.

kenma is stressed. and y/n is still alive. both of them are facing problems.

"can you please wear a maid outfit- no."

kenma shook his head as he continued playing, glancing at the chat once in a while to read the veiwers' questions and comments

╭─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╮

user: how about cat ears?!

user: ^^ cATBOY CATBOY CATBOY

user: u suck at this game wtf

kuroo.tetsu: hey kenma ;)

╰─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╯

"first of all, i do not suck at minecraft thank you very much" kenma scoffed

"second of all, go away kuroo. im still mad at you"

╭─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╮

user: LMFAOOO kuroo what did u do?? 💀💀

user: he probably broke kenma's pc

user: PLSS he's the one kenma’s throwing shade at on twitter

kuroo.tetsu: STOP THE SLANDER 😔✋🏼

user: rooster head lookin ass

user: ^^ NOT THE HAIR

kuroo.testsu: 😃😃

╰─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╯

kenma sighed as he continued building a cute little cottage. he was currently vibing, just building y/n a cute cottage for her to probably burn later on.

and he decided it would be nice to go on stream since his oh-so-lovely girlfriend was still out for work.

ah yes, kenma has somehow kept y/n alive all those years.

barely.

hence why his phone was being bombarded with messages from her, all of which being blurry selfies.

the photos had her sporting a huge grin while atsushi panicked in the background.

╭─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╮

user: ayo, ur phone's blowing up

user: do you have a girlfriend?

user: KODZUKEN LET ME SUCK UR TOES 😋😋🤩

user: ^ ayo chill 😃

╰─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╯

kenma simply ignored them and continued on with his task. all was going well until a loud slam was heard. his cat-like eyes widened as he heard a familiar voice singing from downstairs, it was undoubtedly y/n.

kenma chuckled nervously and muted his mic.

but of course, cute dumb catboy didn't actually mute his mic. haha <3

he ignored all the questions in the chat, all of them being speculations that he has a girlfriend. which he does, but they simply did not need to know that <3

"kenma~" she yelled out "i have a surprise for you!!" she said, followed by menacing giggles.

kenma glanced at the camera before hopping off his gaming chair and peeking his head out of the door.

"y/n, im streaming!! stay down there!" he yelled out in panic

"aw, you're playing hard to get aren't ya?" she chuckled

kenma deadpanned as he saw her limping up the stairs, with her bandages torn and unravelled, same with her clothes. he didn't really think much of it since this is usually how she comes home.

its most likely just due to work and/or another suicide attempt.

"so, kenma.. you'll never know what just happened to me today" she started off with a goofy grin

"im streaming, atleast let me turn it off first-"

she paid no mind to him as she peeled off her ruined coat and pointed to her poorly bandaged stomach

"i got stabbed!"

"you got what?!"

kenma furrowed his brows as he immediately rushed over to his side, cradling her face and waist as he inspected her injuries

"are you okay, kitten?" he asked worriedly

"yep, apparently it wasnt deep enough to be fatal" she sighed dejectedly

"please don't be sad about that." kenma groaned "can you undress?"

"ara ara~ whats this?" she cooed "you're getting real bold, kenma" she smirked at him

she unbuttoned her shirt and started pulling down on her skirt "but since you asked so nicely-"

kenma simply sighed and shook his head. "i was gonna prepare you a bath but now im considering leaving you here to die"

"but the second option would've been better though" she smiled at him

"oh my fucking god."

kozume kenma. (22)

╰─▸ university student, stock trader, pro-gamer, youtuber, ceo of bouncing ball lpt.

╰─▸ y/n's struggling boyfriend. definitely needs a pay after all he's been through.

╰─▸ currently panicking because his girlfriend got stabbed.

l/n y/n. (22)

╰─▸ operative/member of the armed detective agency.

╰─▸ kenma's girlfriend. kinda dumb, very hot to compensate for it. still hasn't died yet.

╰─▸ currently bleeding and wounded. also hoping for severe blood loss.

"kenma, did you know" she mused in a teasing tone "lack of sleep and too much stress could possibly lead to poor memory and lack of awareness"

kenma looked up at her with a look of confusion. he was currently kneeled down before her while she was sat on the bed as he cleaned her wound up with a damp towel.

"why are you telling me this?" he asked

"i just thought it probably applied to you" she snickered

"why? i didnt forget anything-"

he cut himself off with a huge intake of air. he slowly turned his head to look at the screen which still had his stream going on. to make it worse, the camera was on and they were both clearly in the camera's field of view.

to make things worse worse, his mic was on the whole time and the live chat was in shambles.

"i hate it here" he sighed

kenma laid his head on her lap as he continued on patching her up, honestly not caring that this whole scene was being recorded for thousands or millions of people to see.

"well, atleast the internet could finally see my beauty before i die" she laughed

she ran her fingers through kenma's hair as he grumbled under his breath. kenma was a pretty private person. he made sure not to overshare, given his current 'influencer' status. and he was planning on keeping his relationship a secret, though it seems he can't do that anymore.

"might as well say hi" she shrugged

so of course, she then decided to walk up to the camera looking utterly dishevelled and roughed up.

for context, the newly wrapped bandages around her stomach was being stained already by a crimson red hue and it was only getting worse the more she moved, undoubtedly messing up her wound.

"hi, im kenma's girlfriend and if i see you flirting with him i will make you regret it" she grinned

"y/n!" kenma groaned from the bed "you're close to dying right now, turn the stream off"

ignoring him, she proceeded to read the veiwers' comments, laughing at some of them while she joked around.

╭─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╮

user: heLLO?!?!

user: GE HAS A GIRLFRIEND NOOO

user: bruh, did i just hear that right? were you fuckin stabbed?

user: ur kinda hot tho

╰─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╯

kenma furrowed his brows as he reluctantly walked up behind her, reading the comments with varying reactions

╭─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╮

user: well damn, hot bloody girl comes in and suddenly im lesbian

user: kenma looks so done

kuroo.tetsu: hi y/n ;)

user: HER NAME IS Y/N

╰─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╯

"jesus christ shut up, kuroo" kenma grumbled out with a sigh

"yup! yup! im y/n, and no, i am not a criminal. i swear." she shook her head

"i got an injury from my job, that's all." she cleared up

╭─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╮

user: tangina nyo sana ol

user: MSKAKAKKA

user: THIS IS LOWKEY ICONIC

user: time to scratch another gamer boy off my possible bf list 😔

user: girl wtf happened to u

user: that's wack bro 🚶‍♀️

╰─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╯

"great question, random person from the internet!" she beamed "see, what happened was.."

"i went on a certain mission and got severely injured. though, when i called for help nobody responded" she said

kenma furrowed his brows at her words. "why didn't anybody respond?" he asked. she sighed and fiddled with her torn bandages, pouting her lips as she does so.

"well, when i told them that i was finally on death's door, all they said to me was 'congratulations!' and all that.." she said "what's your take on that, hm?" she asked kenma

"im not surprised" he said

she grinned at his words and leaned in for a kiss. "you're so mean to me, kenma~" she whined��

she licked her lips as she held his blushing face in her hands, she nuzzled their noses as she leaned in closer to him.

╭─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╮

kuroo.tetsu: oh shit 😳

user: we all know where this is heading ;)

user: sana ol talaga punyemas

user: AYO CHILL

user: why we goin so fuckin fasstttt 😳

╰─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╯

kenma hastily turned the camera off as soon as y/n's lips touched his.

"kitten, were still- hmph-"

he was only silenced as she slipped her tongue in his mouth, smirking lightly as she ran her fingers through his hair

"thanks babe." she said as she pulled away, giving him a soft peck on his cheek and a nod "anyways.." she hummed as she turned the camera on once again

she looked through the chat while kenma slaps his face to get rid of his blush.

╭─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╮

user: ur fuckin freaky

kuroo.tetsu: oya oya 😼😼

user: MS MAAM I JUST MET U AND I LOVE U ALREADY WJABSJSJJS

user: not me blushing chiiilllleeeeee 🏃‍♀️

user: KENMA IS FLUSTERED

kuroo.tetsu: kenma, i didnt expect this from u 😼

user: im so fucking JEALOUS GRR😡

user: girl r u bleeding rn 😃

╰─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╯

upon reading a certain comment, she subconsciously grazed her fingers against her bandaged wound. her eyes slightly widening as she felt a concerning amount of wetness seeping through

she glanced at kenma who was still calming himself down and inspected her wound

"oh my.." she muttered, though she couldn't help but let a smile slip through

so like any normal person would do, she simply ignored her bleeding wound and the fact that she was getting a bit lightheaded. haha <3

"anyways, let's answer some questions!" she beamed

╭─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╮

user: what's ur full name

user: what's ur job miss girl

user: are you possibly looking for a gf, because i am more

than willing to take the spot 🚶‍♀️

user: how did you meet??

╰─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╯

"alright, those are all very nice questions" she chuckled. kenma, who's now calmed down, sat down beside her to look at the chat.

"first, im l/n y/n" she mused "nice to meet ya"

"second im a detective! mhm, im cooler than your fathers"

"third, it depends, belladonna" she cooed as she sent the camera flirty smirk "are you perhaps willing to join me in a double suicide?"

"oh god.." kenma grumbled. he pouted at her and shook his head in disapproval. "don't flirt with random girls" he whined

"why not?"

"uh- because i am your beloved boyfriend, is that not good enough of a reason??"

"... anyways, we met at a cafe way back in high school" she said with a smile "also, i asked him to join me on a double suicide" she said

she was smiling and nodding as if it was the most normal thing in the world, all while kenma nods along

╭─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╮

user: wtf are u okay 🗿

kuroo.tetsu: teenage romance 🤩

user: cute ❤️

user: im concerned ❤️

user: ur a detective?? cool

user: LMAOO I'LL GO ON A DOUBLE SEWER SLIDE

WITH U MOMMY 😩😩😋

user: ^^ SAME 😩

user: CHOKE ME WITH THOSE BANDAGES MOMMAE 😩

user: u r still bleeding 🚶‍♀️

╰─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╯

kenma was simply glaring at the chat as more compliments and flirtatious comments came flowing in, all of which were directed to his girlfriend.

"this is why i didn't wanna let people know about you.." kenma grumbled

"aww, why not?" she asked with a playful pout

"people are flirting with you." he sighed "also, stop asking for my girlfriend's onlyfans! she doesn't even have one!" he snarled

╭─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╮

user: LMAOO CATBOY IS ANGRY 😩

user: y/n-senpai spit on me 😡😡

user: drop the onlyfans

user: chupapi munyanyo 😩

╰─━━━━━━━━━━━━─╯

"anyways, i'd hate to ruin the mood" she chimed in with a sluggish giggle "but im so wet kenma" she whined out

a menacing smirk was etched on her lips as kenma spluttered in response, a bright red hue covering his face almost instantly as he faced her with widened eyes

"y-y/n! why would you say that?!" he whisper shouted

"cuz i am" she whined out as she grabbed his hand and trailed it down her abdomen

she faced the camera and gave them a shit-eating grin as kenma mumbled out incoherent words

"y/n we should-" he cut himself off as he felt the concerning amount of blood drip down his whole arm

kenma's face paled as he looked up to see her smiling like a kid in a candy store, completely unbothered.

"y/n, you idiot! why didn't you tell me!" kenma exclaimed

"um- my girlfriend is bleeding. excessively. so uh- bye i guess" it was all he said before hastily ending his stream and turning off his computer.

"y/n, let's get you to a hospital" he said as he reached down to carry her away. though she simply slapped his hands off and closed her eyes.

"nope. this is my time, kenma. don't ruin it for me" she said

"you're fucking dying!!"

"well, would you like to join me?"

"no"

"damn." she muttered in response

"so...wanna fuck?" she asked sheepishly

"for the love of god-"

this was so messy :/

195 notes · View notes

shoichee · 3 years

Note

hello! may i ask some tips about the instragram acccunts the GoM + kagami could have? like of sort of post, amount of followers, stuff like that THANK U and have a great day !!

THIS IS ACTUALLY HILARIOUS SINCE I BREATHE OFF OF INSTAGRAM LFMAO

[Headcanons]

Kuroko Tetsuya

HELP WHAT IF HE HAS NO PRESENCE ON SOCIAL MEDIA TOO—

professional lurker

never comments on anything unless it’s to congratulate under a friend’s post or something like that

probably started using it because Ogiwara moved from letters and texts to just... instagram (technology advancements, jazz hands)

his account is on private, and he only lets people he knows follow him

all of his posts are pictures to commemorate something or just really wholesome group pictures

DEFINITELY has that picture of the GoMs at his birthday OVA

DEFINITELY also posted the big birthday picture taken at the end of the party

and also had typed very sappy BIG paragraph captions for both of these posts, talking about the journey and him being grateful… y’know, him being him

HIS ENTIRE COMMENT SECTIONS ARE JUST EVERYONE SOBBING AND KEYBOARD SPAMMING??? ONLY LIKE MIDORIMA AND AKASHI POST COHERENT RESPONSES UNDERNEATH

@kiseryouta: kuROKOCCHIIIII!!NEJWIEISK

@momoiowo: TETSUU (ʃƪ˘･ᴗ･˘) YOURE SO SWEET REEEE

@a_daikiii: i stg quit being so corny no one died yet🙄 and @momoiowo relax smh

@shin_chan77: I suppose I can express some form of gratitude for being in my life despite you being a blood type A. (insert a giant paragraph after this)

@4k4shi: This was very touching to read, Kuroko. I’m very glad that our… (insert him going down memory lane)

Murasakibara has no comment LMAO

his entire Seirin team are his hype men under his posts

his profile picture is literally the gray default blank head because he didn’t even set up a profile picture for himself

he has like 20 followers max or something?

8 posts? like, he only posts on special occasions or big events

his occasional stories are always comprised of Nigou and blurry Kagami pictures/videos running away from Nigou UH OH (courtesy of @dust-of-fandoms)

@tetsuya11 for his user handle

@dust-of-fandoms JUST MADE AN INSTAGRAM FOR HIM HERE!!

Kise Ryota

uses his instagram account as a portfolio for his modeling career

majority of his posts are actually pictures he managed to snag from his frequent model shoots

it looks SO professional… but then you look at his IGTVs and his reel videos

his reels are either short clips of mini vlog series he does whenever he visits the GoMs or when he’s recording his Kaijō teammates doing tricks and dunks

his IGTVs are either skincare tutorials, fashion advice… or just… unexplainable, out-of-context shitposts of Kise running away from what fans assumed “a green-haired man” or some “captain”

follower account?? 124k

who wouldn’t resist a hot model?

DEFINITELY HAS A TIKTOK I CAN FEEL IT

@kiseryouta with an official verification next to it

people either love him or hate him

posts a casual selfie from time to time, and people praise him for “being real” LMAODOA AND HE’S JUST STARING AT HIS PHONE LIKE “??? IMIG BUT I JUST FELT CUTE TODAY”

his captions feel fake LMAO like: “Wow! today’s so pretty today!” as he puts a selfie post OR “What’s your favorite game?✨” under a professionally-shot model picture that does not correlate with the caption???

has posted shitposts on his stories and his fans are utterly confused… only the GoMs get it LMAO

Midorima Shintarou

ONLY reason why he has social media is because Takao convinced him that he could let everyone know the daily lucky items for each signs for every post he makes

so for the first 2 months of having instagram he just casually posts a “daily horoscope” report(?) for the day

his content attracted in all the astrology fans and people who are devoted to tarots

and he’s CONFUSED.

… Takao may or may not have played a hand in messing with the algorithms to expose his account to bigger audiences

once Midorima finds out he’s MAD LMAO *insert Takao pain noises*

either goes down two paths: just casually continuing to post the daily Oha Asa predictions without interacting with anyone OR deleting his account and making a new PRIVATE one just for communication/lurking purposes

so he can honestly have 10k followers if he chooses to be a horoscope account or like 3 followers on his private, take it or leave it

maybe he has two accounts if he feels that having instagram has its merits

definitely has a shit ton of random stuff/posts in his saved collections

boomer energy, like… what’s a “reels” feature?? people talk to their phone camera and record that?? he’s squinting really hard and scratching his head

either has 356 horoscope posts on his “main” or like 19 posts on his private

has a rubber duck as a profile picture for BOTH ACCOUNTS HELP HIM

@oha_asa_ for his horoscope account or @shin_chan77 as his personal because he doesn’t know how to change his username (thanks, Takao LMAO)

Aomine Daiki

he doesn’t give a shit about instagram LOL

it’s MOMOI who handles his account because he doesn’t wanna bother with it LMAOO

she would tease him and try to “encourage” him to stop lazing around by taking pictures of him whenever he’s snoozing and posting it

but he’s so damn good-looking that his sleeping pictures got some traction with new fans

Aomine is still sleeping

his account also has pictures of him eating at Maji burger or at a café, and of course Momoi is the one snapping these photos of him

he started caring about it a little more once Momoi told him that he can post videos of himself doing trickshots and one-on-ones to potentially find worthy rivals over the internet and meet up

so now his account (videos, reels, IGTVs) are all riddled with basketball/small parkour footage shot by yours truly, Momoi

so his fanbase is split between thirsty people and people who genuinely admire him for his skills… but I mean there’s also people in both categories, anywho

he’d totally follow his favorite Japanese idols on IG if they had one

also would follow any NBA-related accounts/players he admires

has like 2.7k followers (but growing really fast) with like 176 posts of videos and random pictures of him

his profile picture is literally a picture of him sleeping by Momoi

@a_daikiii

Momoi Satsuki

LOTS OF REALLY cute, playful selfies, and a lot of them are used with cute filters from the Snow app

sometimes would post herself doing a really cute Tiktok dance while in her school uniform

she doesn’t post too much; she’s actually more into posting IG stories and making highlights out of them and then making highlight covers have a coordinating theme together

very aesthetic theme on her feed overall hehe

definitely uses her account to comment on other GoMs posts, often commenting something snarky on Aomine’s and Kise’s

actually has 1-2 IGTVs on the Vorpal Sword’s big game against the Jabberwocks

doesn’t have much of full-body shots/outfit pictures other than mirror selfies because Aomine refuses to take good pictures of her

only when she sees Kise or Kuroko is when she can ask either to be a photographer

she’s definitely gotten a few small collab offers from small businesses, but she usually ignores them because it’s not exactly her thing

her profile picture is just a selfie with a sketch-line cat ear filter

uses a bunch of emoticons on her bio, captions, comments, everything

⌒(ㅇㅅㅇ❀)⌒ or ☆⌒(＞。≪) or .₊̣̇.ෆ˟̑*̑˚̑*̑˟̑ෆ.₊̣̇.ෆ˟̑*̑˚̑*̑˟̑ෆ.₊̣̇.ෆ˟̑*̑˚̑*̑˟̑ෆ.₊̣̇.ෆ˟̑*̑˚̑*̑˟̑ෆ.₊̣̇. you get the picture

967 followers… that looks way too specific, but it’s somewhere around there; a lot of them came from Aomine’s account after they saw who’s been taking his pictures, and they wanna learn more about her??

around 40 posts?

@momoiowo

Murasakibara Atsushi

Himuro showed him how to use the app, but Murasakibara doesn’t find ANY USE FOR THIS LMAOO

he’d probably only get on it to look at food on the explore page and drool about the cuisines

keeps tabs on local places/restaurants/shops on instagram; those are probably the only accounts he’d follow tbh

it’s probably like ONE post and it’s an old picture of a dango on a plate he ate like 2 years ago

I have this image in my head that he has a really cute bento art as his profile picture?? can you imagine a Rilakkuma-shaped rice as his PROFILE PICTURE?

his bio is definitely: “hungry”

and that’s it

27 followers, and it’s literally just his Yōsen teammates, the GoMs and probably some other classmates of his

his captions are literally empty or 1-2 words

@oomaib0

Akashi Seijuro

only uses instagram because it’ll be beneficial for his company and to expand social networks, plus getting those sweet business deals and engagement

he doesn’t mind seeing really wholesome videos on the explore page though

when he wants to relax, a cat video melts his stress away

laughs to himself while he reads all the shenanigans underneath the GoMs’ posts

DEFINITELY loses a few brain cells seeing trolls and idiots on the internet… especially on controversial or political ones LMAO

he at first had to REFRAIN himself and take deep breaths before he just scrolls on, but he eventually got used to them and can now easily ignore them as easy as he breathes air

he actually enjoys shitposts and meme videos?? like he may not completely understand the meme trends sometimes, but he’ll still find it amusing enough for a chuckle

he ends up being the one who uses instagram the most? like Kise posts a shit ton, yeah, but Kise doesn’t really sit down and just scroll endlessly; Kise releases out content, while Akashi consumes the content

he reasons with himself that it’s to study his current demographics for the company, and while that may be true, Akashi just enjoys social media, plain and simple LOL

he does get to study the behaviors of all the generations using the platform, young folks and old folks alike, and it does get him excited in using his analytical skills to try to figure out people BEHIND a screen rather than those in front of him

it makes a really good challenge for him when he wants a good mental exercise

he has a post or two about his horses, his manor, and a video or two on him playing his violin?? but most are business-related, them being advertisements or business contracts/offers… things like that

his highlights are all about Q&As regarding the company, his background, his skillsets, etc. like an actual resumé

actually links current world issue cards/petitions on top of his company website; he’s quite an advocate

he actually doesn’t post about basketball because that’s something very close to his heart since it reminds him of his late mother… having that mixed in with his company-related posts feels wrong to him

27k followers, most of them are business-related accounts AND some are some followers his father bought for him without Akashi’s input to inflate engagement, etc.

@4k4shi… oh he thinks he’s SO CLEVER FOR MAKING THIS USERNAME LOL with the 4 being his jersey number and the 4s looking like As… AKASHI PLEASE—

his profile pic is like a professionally taken picture, nothing less for our king

his grammar and syntax are impeccable on social media; after all, he’s still being judged for how he carries himself even on the media

Kagami Taiga

mukbang guy… DEFINITELY

hot guy eating nine plates of steaks

IGTVs are filled with mukbang videos because Kuroko said he could make a living off of his appetite

HE COULD MAKE MONEY OFF OF JUST EATING? SIGN HIM UP.

on his posts, he posts dishes he makes for the day/is proud of and talks about the dish and ingredients briefly in the caption

that, or he has pictures of his new basketball shoes LMAO

or all of his basketball merch

HE’S DEFINITELY POSTED PICTURES OF LANDMARKS AND OTHER ICONIC PLACES HE’S TRAVELED TO (*cough* in America)

has a generic Jordan brand logo against a dark background as a profile picture

doesn’t have his face anywhere unless it’s in a mukbang video

279 followers or something

why do I have a feeling that he’ll accidentally blow up when Alex takes his phone to do a quick selfie on it?—

@taiga10

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sword-dad-fukuzawa · 4 years

Text

The Cycle of Abuse in BSD

A more character-analysis post tonight, though I should be working on that Akutagawa fighting style analysis.

BSD has tons of well-written themes, such as the meaning of life in relation to death, what it means to be a good person, and things to live by. But I especially appreciate how the show portrays abuse, and how it’s a cycle--just as well, I’d argue, as the She-Ra reboot. There was a vid done on the She-Ra reboot that I will find and link that inspired this post somewhat.

There are some pretty obvious parallels drawn between Mori and Fukuzawa, Chuuya and Dazai, then Akutagawa and Atsushi. There is a chain of mentorship and partnership that is passed down through the generations, but there’s also a chain of abuse--from Mori, to Dazai, to Aku, and finally to Kyouka. The most obvious abusive relationship would be the one between Dazai and Aku.

Physical abuse notwithstanding, there was the extreme emotional conditioning that Dazai put Aku through. We see in flashbacks that Dazai belittled Akutagawa at every opportunity, telling him to be faster, better, and stronger because he was not good enough as he was. He destroyed the self esteem of a child who was already traumatized from a terrible childhood until said child was dependent on him for approval.

Aku is desperate for Dazai to give him praise, considering many of his lines are about how much he wants Dazai to acknowledge him. You’d think, once Dazai left the mafia and tried to be a better person, the abuse would stop. But it doesn’t.

During the Guild arc, there was that scene where Atsushi needed to get past Aku. Dazai tells him how, and he follows orders. He says to Aku, “Dazai wants to talk to you”, then chucks the phone out into the chasm. Akutagawa goes batshit, abandoning his self-imposed mission to dive after the phone. When he finally grabs it, Atsushi is long gone and Dazai has hung up.

This happens again during the Rats arc, when Atsushi and Aku team up to fight Fyodor’s creepy earthbender. Dazai says to Aku, “It’s been four years since you’ve been under my command. I hope you’ve gotten more capable.”

Akutagawa’s only response is “Yes, sir.” His single-minded focus on succeeding on this mission is played for laughs when Atsushi tries to snap him out of it, but it’s actually quite chilling. Dazai, who is ostensibly his abuser, is still manipulating him in order to make sure his goals are met.

Is it for the greater good? Arguably, yes. But abuse is abuse, and within the greater context of Aku’s character arc, Dazai’s reestablished presence in his life is concerning. Because he still wants Dazai’s approval. I’m pretty sure he states that it’s one of the things he lives for.

And if you look closely, he does what he’s been taught to Kyouka. You don’t belong with the ADA, he tells her, echoing Kouyou’s “flower of darkness” rhetoric. You can’t be a good person. The difference between Aku and her is that she escapes, to become a happier person away from the Port Mafia and away from Aku. This makes the scene where she confronts him in the cannibalism arc so powerful, because Aku is happy for her.

Mori and Dazai are a little harder to parse, mostly due to a lack of information and the subtle hints that Dazai isn’t actually like the other characters in BSD. He lacks something--be it a will to live, the capacity for empathy, or the ability to care about other people’s suffering, there’s something missing. It’s evident especially in that scene in Fifteen, when Dazai shoots the corpse of the GSS soldier several times before Chuuya forces him to stop. There is something wrong with Dazai that isn’t based in trauma or abuse.

The problem, then, is that Mori encourages this. He cultivate’s Dazai’s ruthlessness and manipulates him first with the promise of an easy suicide (at the beginning of Fifteen) and then with the promise of something to live for. Dazai is turned into a living weapon and he knows this, he’s fine with this. That doesn’t make it any less right, and makes what he does to Aku just as unforgivable. Akutagawa is molded into a rabid dog whose leash is supposedly held by the Port Mafia--but really, it’s held by Dazai.

What I love about BSD is how it explores these themes with care and without romanticizing them. There is nothing cute about Dazai shooting a corpse multiple times. There’s nothing sexy about the way Akutagawa tells Kyouka numerous times that she will never be a good person. There is nothing hot about a confirmed pedophile promising a fifteen-year-old kid an easy way to kill himself.

I mean, maybe this is just a response to all the Dazai thirst I keep seeing popping up on my Insta feed. I think he’s amazingly well-written and a good protagonist, and his character arc is glorious in its subtlety. I also see why someone could find him attractive--he is, after all, the pinnacle of bishounen. It’s just not for me, ya know?

But the complexity of all the characters in Bungou is why I love this show so much. Dazai has numerous sides to him the way Aku, Mori, and Kyouka do, and they combine to make a person who is neither entirely good nor entirely bad. There’s just something about morally ambiguous characters that’s very compelling.

That said, I don’t hate Dazai. Please don’t burn me at the stake.

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uraharasandals · 4 years

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It may be surprising to y’all but I’m actually going to be in my last year of high school next year and university applications are in fact, a thing. Anyways, to all of you out there who need this like me, hang in there and let’s get through 2020 as well as we could :)

Also this turned out to be way longer than I thought it would be so I decided to divide it into organisations!

How BSD characters would help their S/O through college apps (Part 1) [ADA]

[Kunikida]

- This man is a sweetheart despite his short fuse towards Dazai. When he sees you freaking out in front of your computer, he quickly rushes to your side with a mug of chamomile tea (yes he has done his research; Kunikida knew which tea is the most calming and soothing). Once you manage to calm down and let him wipe away your tears of frustration (if you had any), he asks you what was wrong.

- Kunikida lets out a sigh of relief when he heard that it wasn’t something life-threatening. However, he still recognises that college applications are extremely important, so he resolves to help you as best as he could.

- Kunikida has been to university, so he knew that the process was quite difficult. However, when you list out your problems with a lot of terms and jargons that are specific to the college application system, his head went up in confusion.

- He quickly figured out the basics through Google though, and did research on a lot of applications that did get the applicant into the universities that you were looking at. After leaving him alone for five hours and stressing through it by yourself, he came back with a stack of information that would help you, and talked you through it slowly, making sure you understood all of it.

[Dazai]

- Dazai tries to cheer you up with jokes and his frolicking around, as well as snacks and maybe even something romantic. But when you start breaking down into tears of frustration, he starts to mildly panic. He asks if there was anything he could do to help and you really didn’t know.

- So he decided to look at what was scaring you so much. Dazai has to admit, he was a little surprised at how complex the entire thing was. But he manages to educate himself on it to try and help you for once (yes, Dazai can be helpful when he wants to be thank you very much)

- Once he’d checked you have calmed down, he presents you with a whole new host of options; do you want him to help you threaten or bribe your dream university so they would accept you? After your shock at his proposed solutions faded, he starts to offer actually useful advice.

- Dazai is a strategist and he knows it. So he laid out his plan to ‘conquer’ this complicated game of ‘entering university’ (because after all, it’s still a situation where brains would help; there were set rules and people had manoeuvred around it. He would simply do the same and play dirty). Amazingly, his plans were strategies that you had seen people talk about on Youtube -- and once again Dazai took the opportunity to brag about it and act cute around you.

[Atsushi]

- Atsushi isn’t sure how important university really was, but then he saw you having a breakdown in front of your computer and knew it was serious and competitive business. After panicking for about ten minutes, he calmed down enough to ask whether you were okay and whether you need anything.

- After getting you a glass of water, he tries to reason his way around it; after all, a lot of people had got through life without university, so it wasn’t absolutely necessary. Besides, you can always join the ADA! But when he saw it was going nowhere, he decided to call in the expert - Dazai.

- Dazai gave him shit advice as always, so he turned to Kunikida. Kunikida rambled on for quite a while, but he summarised it at the end by simply saying ‘Try to figure it out yourself before you can help her, brat.’

- So somehow he decides to try for university himself as well, despite not having had any qualifications before. Atsushi decided to try getting into a vocational training institute (where you learn practical skills rather than going for an academic/professional degree), and you ended up helping each other to your dream universities :)

[Yosano]

- Yosano-sensei is another one who doesn’t understand the need to go to university. She herself became a healer through her abilities (and her past which we won’t go into), so she thought that it was ridiculous you needed to go to medical school.

- But when she realises the gravity of the situation she immediately sobers up. While she knows that she can’t help on that end, she offers as much moral support as she could; ushering you to bed whenever she sees you staying up too late, making you meals or getting takeout whenever you want to stress eat, or comforting you. She was there for every step of the way, and available for hugs all the time.

- When you had to go for an interview, she made sure you were dressed properly for the occasion. Even if it was an online interview, there were no excuses; you absolutely cannot wear a formal shirt and shorts just because you were at home.

- Once you were done and finally finished with the applications, she drags you out on a shopping trip with her. It didn’t matter that there wasn’t anything you guys needed, she made up her mind that it was better for you to get out of the house and take in some fresh air. Besides, it was the better alternative to sitting in front of the computer and continuing to fret.

[Ranpo]

- The third one that doesn’t give a crap about university. He decided to pick a fight with you, stating out about 100 reasons why it was pointless to go and why you shouldn’t go because 1) it was useless and 2) he needs you by his side.

- He had meant to rile you up in a fight, but that just resulted in you being more stressed and attempting to push him away instead of seeking him for comfort. When you started giving him the cold shoulder (because you really needed to concentrate), Ranpo threw a fit and there was a cold war in the house for a few days.

- Eventually, he asked Kunikida about what was so important about university, and realised that it may actually mean a lot to you. But being Ranpo, his pride was still there and he didn’t want to apologize just yet. He decided, however, to be as helpful as he could be.

- And every time you sit in front of the computer, there was a different kind of sweet sitting there waiting for you. Sometimes it was your favourite, sometimes it was his favourite, but it didn’t really matter; the intentions did. When Ranpo saw you accepting the sweets, he took it as a sign that you forgave him and started to stick to your side whenever you were working on your applications. He doesn’t really say anything, but you knew he was there as best as he could.

[Tanizaki]

- Somehow he found you in one of your breakdown sessions and immediately panicked. However, instead of being in panic mode for ten minutes like Atsushi did, he asked hesitantly whether he could approach you, and when given permission, he held and hugged you until you were able to calm down significantly.

- Tanizaki admits that he doesn’t really know how to help; he was a student formerly but quit to join the ADA. However, Naomi was still in high school, so he decided to approach his sister for help regarding this.

- Naomi gave him loads of tips which he shared to you, but eventually he invited her over and you two had loads of studying sessions and university application sessions, which helped you a lot, especially when you had a friend together. Naomi was also motivational because she gets things done easily, and gives you a lot of advice.

- Tanizaki knew that he would be interfering if he was part of the circle, so he just lets you and his sister get it on. He does provide mental support and food though, and cooks dinner, and makes desserts whenever you two feel stressed or are studying late into the night.

[Kenji]

- Kenji is a country boy. He doesn’t know what this complex university system is, because back in the country you get plucked out of school every so often to help with crops and most of them don’t make it to university. (please tell me if I got this incorrect!)

- Being innocent and carefree as he was, he kept asking you questions about how things were done. At first you replied to get him away from you, because you needed peace and quiet, but while answering him, you realised you answered some of your own questions.

- Kenji was also a kind boy, so he asked the people he helped around Yokohama how he could help you. Some of them offered genuine advice, but he just messes it up when he tries to offer it to you, but it does make you laugh. Sometimes, however, he comes back with sweets and offerings from sympathetic parents; he once came back with a kitten, which made your stress decrease a LOT.

- On weekends, he insisted on you taking a trip with him to the countryside even though you protested it; you had a lot on your plate. However, these trips often help clear your head and you were able to write more once you get home. The fresh air does do wonders for your stress.

[Kyouka]

- Her first response was to kill someone, obviously. However, once you persuaded her that it doesn’t work, she told you, with a deadpan face, to trash the computer. That wouldn’t work either.

- She tried to bring you all sorts of cute things to cheer you up. That did, temporarily, but she soon realised the fundamental problem of ‘not enough space’. So she decided to cook for you instead, which helped a lot.

- Kyouka doesn’t really understand how university works, so she had you explain it to her. Once she learnt all of it, however, she started offering advice on her experience as an assassin, and tried to put them in context of university applications.

- You weren’t sure how, but it somehow worked. Kyouka also asked Atsushi for help, who asked Kunikida. At the end, she dragged Kunikida to your place and helped you, while staring at your process. Whenever you get stressed and wanted to throw things, she offers her ability as target practice.

[Fukuzawa]

- Fukuzawa did go onto higher education. But back in his days higher education was much, much simpler. He just stared on in disbelief when you tried to explain the current university application process, and had to tell you that it was ridiculous.

- However, he tries his best to help. Being an avid reader of literature, he introduced books that he thinks might help your preparation; if you didn’t have time to read them, he gives you ten minute crash courses on them (despite his dislike of people not reading what he recommends), and helps you out on how to summarise them properly on your applications.

- Fukuazawa also helps you proofread your essays or applications. He points out what he thinks as incoherent or lengthy; basically, after his scrutiny, your application was beautifully polished in the only way he could help.

- He also makes sure you gets enough rest and sleep in the midst of all this. Fukuzawa remembers to usher you away to bed at the appropriate timing and to wake you up whenever you decided to operate on sleep deprivation alone. He was the only thing keeping you to a reasonable schedule and timetable, but you could get out of it if you waved a cat in front of his face.

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shardclan · 5 years

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Anyone who knew anything at all knew you could cloak the sound of your footsteps at will on the twilit borderlands of Bramble Step.

You didn't have to know anything complicated. The magic was omnipresent in the fog and the stones and the humming neon. For regulars, using it was a habit as unconscious as breathing.

Yet, at the bottom of black suede boots, Castel's steps cracked the foggy silence. She was used to being in control, but Ice was rising over all others and she felt invincible. Atop perilously high heels cranked even higher by sharp spikes of self-made ice, she walked as though the entire world was her stepping stone. Her eyes glittered with untouchable certainty that she could have whatever she wanted.

On this day, during this time, that included the good Analemma Knight lingering outside of Carnelian's door.

Arcanus never entered when Carnelian wasn't home. At best he might stay if the detective left him there, but he never abused his privilege to come and go at will.

Like any number of other eyes, his were drawn to the encroaching click of her stride. As was the case with most guardians, his glamour was mountainous. Two heads taller that hers despite the aid of her heels, and broad as a snapper. Yet as she looked up at his totally unguarded expression, he seemed harmless as a lamb. All the hours spent admiring from afar, the occasional drunk pining--it seemed silly to her now. What exactly had she been afraid of?

Rejection? She wasn't some foolish fledgling hoping to win his affection.

Carnelian? Maybe. But Carnelian was a much different drake than he had been once, and had proved much warmer about his little bosom buddy than she expected.

The longer she found herself taking him in and quite vividly imagining his sleek, well-kept hair wrapped around her fist, the more she thought she understood. She would have scared him away once. As he was when he first caught her eye, he would have been completely unable to cope with a woman like her being anywhere near him. But like the dear friend he had made here, he wasn't the same drake he was before.

And she wasn't the same dam.

"He missed you, you know."

"I do know." His voice was gruff, but the crack of a fond smile was there. "However much he might not say it."

"He's a surprisingly coy man, isn't he?"

Arcanus looked at her properly. He seemed to remember exactly where he was, and tightened up. "...He can be."

"Relax," she soothed and pointed up to a lofty, bramble-encircled window on the opposite side of the avenue. "I'm just a neighbor. I see you and him and Atsushi coming and going all the time. Well..."

She smirked up at Carnelian's closed curtains. "Atsushi does a lot more coming than going."

It was comments exactly like that that she knew would have sent Arcanus running once, she knew. But it was worth making him blush. Such an endearing shade of red; and his wide-eyed surprise was quite cute.

"That's none of my business!" he barked, trying and failing to sound severe. "I understood Bramble Step liked to keep its secrets more closely!"

"That's not a secret, trust me. The whole block knows. A secret is more like... Oh, I've got a great one: Carnelian got jealous that you drank with Gethsemene instead of him during the little soiree after Rebis renamed the clan."

Arcanus' sputter was instant. Try as he might, the information went straight to his imagination and was wreaking all sorts of havoc with his image of Carnelian. "You shouldn't out him like that," he insisted, despite the tears at the corners of his eyes. "It's not polite, why would you even tell me that?"

"To see you laugh," she admitted, and grinned at his stunned expression. "Don't worry, I know who you are. I'm not trying to get you to hire me. I just thought I'd take a crack at cheering you up since Carnelian isn't in. You usually look kinda down when you come see him."

"I...I see. Thank you..." he murmured with a crooked but warm smile. "I'll have to mind my reputation more closely. You wouldn't happen to know where Carnelian is, would you?"

"I might, but that one won't be a freebie." She watched his shoulders relax, and his crossed arms fall. Teasing him was fun, but bartering a secret was familiar and predictable Bramble Step culture. "Why are you looking for him?"

Arcanus tapped his fingers thoughtfully against his scabbard. "That seems like a low price."

"It's not the price," she said with a shrug. "Just some context. You don't have to answer."

"...It's the Gala. I thought to spend time with him."

"Just routine holiday, huh? Well... I happen to know he's out of town right now. And he took the Descent, so he's out of territory too."

Arcanus' brows drew together, and Castel smiled benignly. During the last Gala, the clan had been celebrating the defeat of the pearlsnatcher. Carnelian had just returned home after a case, and spent many of his free hours bonding with Atsushi. The cycle before that, they had been fresh from the disaster that drove the original clan from the Isles.

Castel had a guess where Carnelian was, but she didn't blame Arcanus for being puzzled. It was her job to run her tongue along the innermost places of other people's hearts, and Carnelian had revealed far more than he probably intended by letting her into his home.

"Maybe he's on another case," Arcanus finally said. "Thank you for the information. I'll return home."

"If you like. We'll have our drink next time."

"What drink is this?"

"The drink you own me in exchange for me telling you Carnelian's business," she purred.

She closed the gap between them until she could see the reflection of her own hungry, near-white eyes in his. "Next time you want some information that isn't covered under the Samaritan Law, make sure you negotiate properly. I'd hate to see you get taken advantage of."

"A drink is an easy task, but your counsel is well taken, miss...?"

She grinned. "You really wanna know?"

He glanced aside, and crossed his arms before looking back at her. "No... I have my own ways of getting information. I'll know your name by the time we meet again."

"I'm sure you will. You know where to find me."

With a last playful wink and a careless wave, she sauntered off further into the fog. Arcanus was too honest for his own good. Too honest for Bramble Step, really. He was so charmingly willing to lose gracefully at a game he had only the barest grasp on playing. His status in the main clan usually meant he didn't have to bother--everyone always answered his questions and got out of his way.

But he was a fast learner. The Step favored fast learners.

And so did Castel.

#Me: Shows up late to the Gala with lore and 6-pack #Flight Rising #C: Castel #C: Arcanus #Aphaster Stories #In which Castel starts making moves

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bungou-stray-dogs-indulgences · 7 years

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Hi there! Just wanna say I absolutely love your blog! I wanted to request headcanons of Akutagawa, Dazai, Atsushi, Chuuya, and Mori (if that number is too big then just the first 3 are fine! ^-^) with an S/o that is an artist, but when they get really into their paintings/drawings, they don't always pay attention to the boys?

(I did general artist HCs too, I hope that’s okay?)

Akutagawa Ryunosuke

For the sake of Akutagawa’s interior decoration, it’s probably a good thing you’re an artist. The only thing clothing his otherwise naked walls is your artwork. No matter what you paint, it’s going on display.

Painting is one of the few things Akutagawa compliments often and openly. Art is one of the things he appreciates most; the fact that such emotion and intensity can be displayed without words amazes him. Normally, Akutagawa wouldn’t be anywhere near as vocally encouraging, but he wants you to know how much genuine pleasure your work brings to him, so he praises everything from your brushstrokes to your color choices.

Secretly, Akutagawa slips your sketchbook in with his belongings if he’s going on a long trip for the Port Mafia. Looking at your drawings comforts him, and the lines winding across the page quickly become his solace when the two of you are apart. Even when he’s countless miles away from you, a mere glance at your sketchbook’s pages makes the distance seem a little less cold.

Akutagawa doesn’t want to pull you away from your hobbies, especially ones that he enjoys as well, so he’s a bit more reluctant to recapture your attention while you’re focused on art. Despite this, he still takes your sudden cold-shoulders a bit personally, even if they’re not intentional.

After awhile, Akutagawa will flat-out tell you he’s sick of you tuning him out. He points out that he really doesn’t have that much time to spend with you, what with all the Port Mafia business he’s got to handle. If you still don’t pack up your supplies, his mood sours instantly. Akutagawa doesn’t dare start putting away your tools himself- he’s worried he’ll screw something up and you’ll be forced to scrap countless hours of work. Instead, he sits perhaps three feet away from you, glowering. He stays there, glaring, still as a statue until you’re simply too uncomfortable to continue.

Dazai Osamu

Dazai praises your art exuberantly and often. There’s no one in the ADA who hasn’t been victim to him waxing poetic on your mastery of shading, the delicacy of your lines, the poetic beauty of your finished pieces. Often, he’ll google complicated artistic terms, just so he can compliment every possible thing there is to point out. Plus, he sounds smarter when he uses words like ‘chiaroscuro’ (even if it’s not always employed strictly in the right context).

Often, Dazai seeks out art exhibitions in Yokohama for the two of you to peruse. No matter the quality of the pieces shown, Dazai always pretends to be disappointed, bemoaning the fact that none of your art is there. Whenever you pick out a work that you like, Dazai sidles as close to it as the gallery attendants will let him. After scrutinizing it for awhile (he usually whips out a magnifying glass), he draws back, sighing dramatically and shaking his head. Dazai points out all the aspects that you could’ve done better, mourning the fact that this got into a gallery and your work remains displayed only in his home.

Depending on the mood he’s in, Dazai either is alright with letting you alone as you work on your art, or he simply can’t handle being ignored. If he’s in one of the latter moods, kiss any potential progress good-bye. When you focus on your art instead of him, he’s immediately scheming ways of drawing your attention back. All of his brain power is channeled into getting you to acknowledge him.

Dazai tries every trick in the book. He starts off with sweet little kisses, smattered on your cheeks and neck, but it only goes downhill from there. If you don’t give in instantly, he morphs into a whiny toddler. Dazai creates racket in the background, pokes at your cheeks, complains about how cruel you’re being, pouting face about two inches away from yours. Things only escalate the longer your will holds out. Once, he set off the fire alarm just so that you’d acknowledge him (he apologized, but he wasn’t really sorry. Setting it off was so satisfying, not to mention effective, he’s got a burning desire to do it again.).

Nakajima Atsushi

Atsushi’s simply amazed by your skills. Whenever you show him a finished piece, he beams, eyes shining with awe as he admires your work. Atsushi’s never been too talented with a pencil and paper, and your creative prowess is only one of the countless reasons why he adores you.

Unless you specifically allow him sneak peeks, Atsushi avoids your unfinished pieces like the plague. To him, something just doesn’t feel right about glancing at such a personal object in progress. If he does happen to notice an uncompleted project, he’s instantly apologizing to you, begging forgiveness for invading your privacy.

If you let him, Atsushi loves to sit back and observe as you work on projects. He admires the way your hands swerve across the paper, sweeping lines with unbelievable grace and precision. He also thinks your facial expressions as you concentrate are adorable. Every time your nose scrunches, or your tongue pokes out of your mouth in concentration, Atsushi can’t help but grin, delighted at your sheer cuteness.

Although Atsushi feels a bit slighted when you spend hours fine tuning artwork instead of hanging out with him, he would never dream of interrupting you. Your level of focus amazes him. As long as you’ve got a paintbrush or pencil in your grasp, Atsushi doesn’t disturb you, occupying himself with something quiet and unobtrusive. He doesn’t even want to cause accidental breaks in your concentration, shying away from all loud noise and distracting activities while you’re at work.

When you’re in your zone, Atsushi keeps close tabs on you. Meals are left by your workspace to ensure that you don’t forget proper nutrition, there’s always a full water glass somewhere nearby, and his inner mother comes out when it’s long past time to pack it up; Atsushi strongly ‘encourages’ you get enough sleep (ignoring him results in an indignant cold-shoulder; he’s trying to look out for your health and you brush him off?! Unacceptible), no matter how much progress you’re making

Nakahara Chuuya

Soon after he discovers you’re an artist, Chuuya’s constantly bothering you to paint something for him. He insists on paying commission. If you won’t let your recompense be money, he’ll settle for paying you in kisses.

Instead of keeping a photograph of you with him, Chuuya holds onto a pocket-sized self portrait. Staring at your likeness, one that you created, brings a smile to his face no matter where he is. The picture especially helps when he’s called away on long Port Mafia tasks; glancing at the image every so often eases some of the loneliness of being apart.

Chuuya will love anything you create, but he’ll especially enjoy a scene of Yokohama at night, with the lights glimmering over the water, or a portrait of you two together. After letting you pick out a suitable frame, he hangs every art piece you give him somewhere noticeable; usually, it ends up decorating the walls of the front hall or dining room. Chuuya’s special favorites go in his bedroom. When you’re not with him, it helps ease his loneliness if the last thing he glances before he falls asleep is one of your artworks.

You have to be careful complaining about your art supplies when around Chuuya. He’s prepared to splurge any amount just so that you’re outfitted with top-of-the-line tools. Whenever he notices that your pencils are growing dangerously short, or that your paintbrushes are fraying beyond redemption, he immediately surprises you with replacements. They’re always an unbelievably expensive brand, probably foreign, and usually, your initials are etched somewhere.

Chuuya will never directly let you know that he’s annoyed when you’re ignoring him. He’ll try every trick in the book to coax you away from your art, though. Chuuya taunts you with the promise of your favorite meals, tries to rub your shoulders until you’re putty in his fingers, even hints at all the other, more… exciting things you could be doing instead. If you’re completely determined to work on your art, he’ll eventually let you be, but he won’t go down without a fight.

Mori Ougai

Mori’s absolutely delighted when he finds out your artistic ability. He encourages all of your hobbies, but this one, he’s especially enthusiastic about supporting. Mori’s no art critic, but he does enjoy browsing pieces. If you’re the one to create it, his interest only skyrockets.

To Mori’s absolute glee, Elise takes a liking to your art, too. Whenever you’re slaving away on a project, she’s probably got one she’s working on, too; she likes to pick out the same subject as you and compare when you both finish. Mori can never decide which is better when pressed for his opinion (usually by Elise). They’re both masterpieces, he insists, and there’s no competition between masters. Both artworks are hung up together, a plaque underneath them identifying the pieces as a collaboration between the world’s two greatest art masters.

Without telling you, Mori calls in a designer and sets up a massive studio for you to work in. The room is fully equipped with every art supply your heart could ever desire. It’s absolutely gorgeous; there’s windows overlooking gardens filled specially with all of your favorite flowers, and skylights littering the ceiling filter in moonlight when you want to work at night. Mori brushes it off as nothing, insisting that artists of your caliber need work spaces that measure up to their skills.

Generally, Mori leaves you be when you’re devoting all your attention to your art, although he’ll whine a bit. After he complains for a few minutes that he deserves your attention just as much as any canvas, he abandons the pursuit of your acknowledgement. Mori’s busy enough that he can occupy himself until you’re ready for him again. He’ll be mopey until you’re back in his arms, though.

There are, of course, exceptions; when Mori’s looking for sex, no amount of charcoal smeared on your hands is going to stop him. He’ll fuck you right against an easel if he has to. In addition, if Elise wants your attention, he’ll stop at nothing to fulfill her demands. Mori will ensure you give the girl what she wants.

#Bungou Stray Dogs #Bungou Stray Dogs Imagines #Mori Ougai #Nakahara Chuuya #Dazai Osamu #Nakajima Atsushi #Akutagawa ryuunosuke #Akutagawa #Atsushi #Chuuya #Dazai #Mori #Bungou Stray Dogs Headcanons

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ssamie · 3 years

Text

nine. “partners in crime and suicide”

kozume kenma x fem dazai!reader

(bsd x hq)

tw: mentons of suicide & breaking into arcades

masterlist. suicide freak!

"thank you for having us!" fukurodani exclaimed as they bowed. it was the end of their three-day practice match, and fukurodani was about to leave and were waiting for their bus.

"hey hey hey!" bokuto called out. he waved his arms around, trying to get y/n's attention, all while akaashi quietly stood beside him.

she chuckled and jogged over to the boy. "hey to you too, bokuto" she mused

"y/n-chan! im gonna miss you!" bokuto said dramatically as he wrapped his beefy arms around her

"i'll miss you too" she laughed "i'll be missing your awesome spikes, bokuto!" bokuto beamed from the praise and hugged her even tighter. "i know right! my spikes are awesome!"

"you're too nice to him, y/n-san" akaashi commented

"yeah, he's been thriving off your compliments for days" konoha snickered as he walked past "he'll probably be down in the slumps once he can't hear you cheering for him anymore"

bokuto pouted and rested his cheek on top of her head. "you're all so mean~" he whined

"oi, oi, oi!" kuroo called out "bokubro, hands off our manager!" he glared playfully

"no way!! join our team instead, y/n-chan!!" bokuto cried out as he squeezed her even tighter and swayed her around. "we already have two managers, bokuto-san" akaashi says as he tried to peel his huge arms off of her

"we can have three!" bokuto countered

"you can stick with two." kenma interjected. kenma stared him down, not talking nor blinking, silently waiting for him to let the girl go.

"r-right!" bokuto smiled nervously. he let her go and sheepishly avoided eye contact with kenma.

"kenma~" she cooed as she slithered her way towards him. "let's go out later" she suggested

"where?" he asked

"its a surprise, of course!" she exclaimed with a grin

"you're not gonna kill me, are you?"

"this is surprisingly nice.." kenma says as he pokes his mochi with his chopsticks

y/n was sat across from him, a cup of tea in hand as she placed her mochi on his plate. "right? this is the usual restaurant the agency goes to" she said with a small smile

kenma nodded and looked out the window as he chews on the sakura mochi. his cat-like eyes watched the cars and people pass by the streets. it was nearing night time, and the sky was slowly darkening, causing the street lights to turn on.

"so, y/n.." he trailed off

"hm?" she hummed back

"why-" kenma stops himself, subconsciously letting out a tired sigh as he watched her pour some suspicious liquid into her drink.

"what the hell are you doing?" kenma deadpanned as he watched her happily mix the contaminated tea.

"shh! let me have my moment, kenma-kun!" she shushed him she giddily grasped the cup and brought it up to her lips.

"y/n, stop that!" kenma exclaimed as he took the drink from her hands

"what did you put in this?! it smells like death in a washing machine!" kenma gagged. he scrunched his nose up as he poured it out the window, emptying the cup before placing it back beside him, so she couldn't reach for it.

"kenma! that was my suicide potion!" she cried out childishly

"your suicide potion?" kenma deadpanned "that's stupid. please don't-"

"dont worry though, i brought an extra one just in case!" she exclaimed "although it's just the chemicals so it'll probably sting my throat a bit"

"how about you don't drink anything at all" kenma sighed. he shoved a mochi in her mouth and snatched the small bottle from her.

"i thought we came here to have a peaceful meal, not so i could watch you die" he said "plus.. there's something i've been meaning to ask you" kenma said "but you just ruined the moment."

"aw! are you finally agreeing to the double suicide?!" she asked with a huge grin. she took his hands in hers and intertwined their fingers together. "is that why you took the drink from me?"

"you wanted to drink it together, didn't you?!"

"no."

kenma shook his head and stared at their hands. more specifically, her bandages. "i wanted to know why you wore these bandages all the time.." he muttered

he looked up to meet eyes with her. though, he soon panicked and frantically bowed his head in apology "i-i mean, if that's okay with you!" he shrieked "it's totally fine if you don't wanna tell me.."

kenma gulped as she continued to stare at him with her (e/c) eyes and an unreadable expression. she then chuckled and pulled her hands away, stuffing them in her pockets as she leaned back on her seat

"well, why do you think i wear them all the time?" she mused

"um.. for injuries?" kenma replied, though he wasn't so sure of his answer

she hummed and nodded along, not confirming nor denying it.

"um, maybe for style?" he asked "though, you'd look perfectly fine without them" he said

"would you like me not to wear my bandages?" she asked him

"um well, no" kenma shrugged "i think it'd feel weird and new if i saw you without them"

"maybe you just like bondage." she suggested with a straight face

"i what??" kenma spluttered as a soft pink hue covered his cheeks "where did that come from?!"

"i dunno, kenma-kun" she shrugged "maybe the reason you like seeing me in bandages so much is because-"

"i don't wanna hear it." kenma groaned

"also.. ʷʰᵒ ʷᵃˢ ᵗʰᵃᵗ ᵍᵘʸ ᵗʰᵉ ᵒᵗʰᵉʳ ᵈᵃʸ?" he muttered bashfully

she raised an eyebrow curiously as she asked him to repeat the question.

"i asked.. who was that guy the other day?" kenma said much louder, much to his embarrassment

"oh." she mumbled. just then, an evil grin formed on her lips as she giggled tauntingly. "oya oya~ why do you ask, kenma~" she teased as she poked on his cheeks

"i- no reason, okay!" kenma exclaimed

he puffed out his reddened cheeks and looked down on his lap, letting his hair cover his face as he tried to ignore her teasing remarks "i just heard that he was your 'old partner' and i got curious" he said

"and how did you hear that, hm?" she smirked "were you spying on me?"

kenma paled at the realisation of his slip up and groaned "well no- okay, kind of.."

"we were just curious so we followed you.. but we stopped after you left the cafe" he admitted

"hm, well his name is chuuya" she said with a fond smile "he's like a tiny chihuahua, and will probably bite you if you touch him"

"oh.." kenma muttered "you guys seemed close..does he work for your agency too?" he asked

she chuckled and shook her head. "no, no. quite the opposite of that, actually"

"we're just old friends, i guess." she shrugged "we met at my old job"

"your old job?" kenma raised a brow "i kind of can't imagine you doing anything else, to be honest"

"i mean, i wouldn't have believed you even worked as a detective if you didn't tell me yourself" he said with a soft laugh

"well then, would you like to guess?" she asked with a smile. kenma blinked back, nodding as he pondered over his answer "well, i guess you could've been a.." he trailed off

"um.." kenma groaned in frustration. he stared directly at her face, trying to think of a job suitable for her and her personality, though nothing came to mind.

"dont bother burning your brain out, brat" a voice chimed in

"yeah, y/n's old profession is still a mystery to us" another voice said

kenma, along with y/n, looked back at the door to see kunikida and atsushi entering the cafe

"oh! atsushi, weren't you aiming for the reward?" she chuckled "watch out, kenma might guess correctly before you!" atsushi panicked and rushed over to their side "was he close to the answer?!" atsushi shrieked

"nope! but you can join the guessing game if you want!" she exclaimed with a cheeky grin

"gladly!" atsushi exclaimed, pulling out a chair and setting it between them. "but just for context.." atsushi trailed off "the reward is still in tact right?"

"yup! 700 grand for the correct answer!" she said with a laugh

"700 grand?" kenma muttered "is the answer really that hard to guess?"

"YES! THE ONLY PERSON WHO PROBABLY KNOWS IS RANPO-SAN AND-" atsushi cut himself off as he finally got a good look of kenma ".. youre that boy she's been obsessing about.." atsushi sweat dropped

"y/n-san.." atsushi sent her a knowing glare, which she responds with an offended scoff

"you hurt me, atsushi" she sighed "i asked him out, and he said yes! i didn't force him this time!"

"what do you mean 'this time' ?" kunikida scowled "are you really pestering the poor boy?" kunikida said "sometimes it's like you're asking to be hit"

kenma blinked as he watched them interact, slowly starting to feel awkward as the man in glasses continue to scold her while atsushi went back to guessing.

"writer?!" atsushi guessed "nope!"

"researcher!" ; "nooo!"

"journalist!" ; "boo!"

"fortune teller!" ; "wrong!~"

"interpretor?!" ; "non, non~"

"its all too random.." kenma commented as he, too, tried to think of the right answer

"actor?!" atsushi shrieked "no! but.." she trailed off, placing her hands on her pink cheeks "that's flattering!"

"y/n.." kenma muttered out. he reached over the table to tug on the sleeve of her coat. she screamed internally from his adorable act and faced him "yes?" she asked

".. i wanna go to the arcade" kenma said with a pout

she, quite literally, had to slap her chest repeatedly as she felt her heart beat faster. "kyANMAAA! YOU'RE SO CUTE!" she squealed "of course, we can go!"

"well then, atsushi-kun, do you yeild?" she chuckled as she picked up the check from the table "well, i can't think of any more.." atsushi sighed defeatedly

"then you can take our check!" she exclaimed as she sent him a cutesy smile. she shoved the bill into his hands and skipped away to the exit with kenma's hand in hers

"wait! i don't have any money-"

"bye-bye~" she waved as she closed the door

"now then, let's get to that arcade"

"y/n this is closed." kenma said with a sigh. they were currently standing infront of an arcade, obviously already closed, after walking for about half an hour

"i know, kenma-kun! no need to state the obvious" she mused. she licked her lips as she continued fiddling with the lock, brows furrowing from concentration as she picked it open with a simple hair clip

"so then why are we here??" kenma grumbled "we could've went to other ones that were open. and it's getting really late, you're lucky my parents aren't home for the week" he said

"silly boy, it's not closed if the door is open, right?" she chuckled as she pointed to the arcade doors

"i wha- did you pick the lock?!" kenma whisper shouted "this is illegal! we're literally breaking in!" he hissed out as he tried to run away

though, she simply grasped his wrist and pulled him inside. "its fine, kenma! we'll just leave a note to the owner" she laughed carefreely "besides, it's not that big of a deal! we'll still pay for tokens!" she said with a smile

kenma worriedly tiptoed inside, squinting his cat-like eyes as he tried to adjust to the dark. he slightly winced as bright, and colorful lights suddenly turned on.

"oop- i found the power switch!" she announced "now then, what game should we play first.." she hummed to herself as she eyed each game

"this is it. i'm gonna die. we're gonna get arrested and i'll rot in the prison. thanks a lot." kenma chanted out. he nervously sat down on the seat infront of the screen which showed 'tekken'

(bro i've never played that game before, and what do you call those huge metal box things with the games in arcades wtf ♀️)

"i got tokens!" she exclaimed as she sat on the one across him.

"this is so wrong" kenma said with a shake of his head though despite that, he still reached out for the token and continued to play.

after some time of pretty much trying out each game and tiring themselves out from the DDR machines by performing some embarrassing choreos.

"okay, i kinda want that one" she said as she pointed to the cat plushy "why? there's one here that's so much bigger" kenma said as he pointed to the kuromi plushy which looked like it could swallow them whole

"this cat looks like you." she defended "im gonna name him kyanma, won't that be cute?"

"plus if we get this, we'll have enough tickets to get that game you want"

staying true to her word, they didn't break or steal anything. so technically, they didn't commit a crime, right? well, only if you scratch out the breaking in part.. but that's okay. they had fun and that's all that matters, alright? 😃

"fine.." kenma mumbled as he plucked the plushy and the game off the shelf

they threw the tickets on the counter, flashed the cctv cameras one last peace sign, and left.

"i can't believe i just did that" kenma muttered out with a laugh "but it was fun. thanks for that, y/n" he smiled at her

she blinked and stared at his side profile as they continued their walk home. "it was fun, yeah.." she chuckled

"so.. how's it feel?" she mused "first crime in your record! do you feel like a misunderstood punk teen now?"

"no, i feel like a criminal."

"same thing!" she beamed with a grin

she locked their arms together and gripped the plushy with her free hand, letting it dangle by her side as they walked "i just realized something.." she gasped

kenma raised a brow and side eyed her "what is it?" he asked

"we're now officially partners in crime and suicide!"

"sure" kenma chuckled

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