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#a swell night on the town
britcision · 1 year
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Alright, friendos! Happy Hanukkah, happy Yule, merry Christmas, happy Kwanza, and happy holidays to anyone I forgot who is still celebrating or gets to start soon!
This chapter is dedicated to all our brave souls who have just made their way through finals! You made it, you’re free, and you deserve a heckin’ break
Tag list: @welcometosasakiworld @kyrianclawraith @someonebored0100 @stealingyourbones @starkcravingmad @frostedthroughghost @akikoyuii @rainbowbunny0159 @littlefeather345 @violet-catsarelife @serasvictoria02 @wolfjackle @blacksea21090 @secretdestinywerewolf @anime-hipster-the-amazing @undead-essence @skitscratched @blackroserelina @snoodly-boop @trickerdi @mayoota-blog @xysidhe @idkmrpianoman @little-apricot-the-writer @chaoticmistake @the-legal-shipper @bun-fish @aroranorth-west @demon-cat-goes-woof @eonic @onyxlightdragon @larks-and-katydids @peachesandcreamfemboy @jesus-camp-the-sequel
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First chapter:
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A Swell Night On The Town
Jason had been pretty sure he knew what to expect from Vlad Masters. The Plasmius file had stood out even amongst all the other ghosts, and not just for being a halfa.
The guy was a stalker, a creep, manipulative as hell, and would not take no for an answer. And no, he didn’t need a second grabby billionaire anywhere near his life, thanks.
He’d dealt with dozens just like him, rich assholes who thought their wealth and power made them untouchable.
And the man himself, standing in front of him? Yeah, okay, Jason was a little surprised.
Vlad’s face had this perfect fist shape to it, like his cheekbones were gonna wave Jason in to break his teeth.
Wild how that worked.
Offering to share Danny’s baby pictures was… an unexpected avenue of attack, honestly. Fucking effective though, and it had somehow defused the situation.
He’d still rather drag the man out by the scruff of his neck, but the apparent peace offering settled something inside him. Well, more directly Danny’s reaction to it.
Danny wasn’t scared of Vlad. Whatever he was, whatever he’d done? However much he’d hurt Danny in the past, used his death against him?
It hadn’t been fear setting Danny off when he knew Vlad was here. Which raised the question of what it had been, but he could always ask later.
For now, Vlad wasn’t an immediate threat to be eliminated, at least not yet. Today, they could play with him a little.
And if that changed? He was ready.
So Jason let his face soften into a smile as Danny groaned, damn near as dramatic as Dick. Let Vlad think he might be tempted.
And maybe just a little enjoy the revenge after all that bugging about the pixie boot photos earlier.
He reached out automatically to steady Danny as he swayed, leaving his hand on his shoulder. And watched Vlad track the gesture, which was… interesting.
Yeah, they could probably get him on the same game as the Manson’s. Jason let his arm slip around the slighter man’s shoulders, skimming gently down his arm.
Danny leaned into him just a little and if that made the pit happy, well, convenient bonus. Most of his attention stayed fixed on Vlad.
“I guess you’ve known each other a long time?” He offered, trying to keep his voice more neutral.
Danny sighed dramatically, folding his arms and glaring.
“Well it sure fucking feels like forever,” he grumbled loudly and Jason grinned, ruffling his hair.
“Not so long as I’d like,” Vlad argued with a soft chuckle, shaking his head. “I’m afraid even though I have always been his godfather we did not meet until he joined the club as it were. Had we met sooner I might have made a better impression.”
Sam snorted most of a laugh derisively through her nose, cocking her hip and smirking at him.
“Would you have given a fuck before he joined the club?” She asked sarcastically, perfectly matching his dramatic emphasis.
Vlad shot her another scathing look, then gave Jason an obsequious smile.
“Of course, I don’t have anything on me, but if you would like to come by some time…” he began, and Danny straightened so fast that something in Jason lurched to pull him back.
He resisted. Barely.
“Hell no Vlad, fuck off. You’re not having Jason over to your creepy ass castle in Wisconsin,” Danny snapped, his eyes flashing green and Jason had a revelation.
That? That was a truly fucking weird thing to see. Even if it hadn’t always been the trigger for violence, yeah, he could see why his family flinched.
Also? Danny getting possessive? Adorable.
Vlad certainly seemed to agree (which made Jason immediately want to change his mind), giving Danny a smug smile.
“Jason is an adult, Daniel, as you are yourself. I believe he can make up his own mind?” He purred, gaze flicking expectantly back to Jason.
It was a good thing he’d been practicing one of his best gala smiles half the month for this occasion. He’d never been more thankful for the training that let him keep it light and sweet.
“I’m not coming to your creepy ass castle in Wisconsin,” he agreed with Danny, loving the way Vlad’s face fell.
Impatient bastard. Like Jason hadn’t proved extremely early on which side of this line he was coming down on. Although…
“But maybe you can email me.”
Keep him sweet. Keep him hopeful. All the better to fully fuck around with later, and maybe give himself a backdoor into any plans.
Danny grinned smugly back at Vlad, folding his arms and leaning into Jason in a way that was definitely all out possessive. Which Jason could kinda get.
The new kid at school liked Danny best. Hell, Jason was always smug as fuck when one of the birds sided with him over B.
“Aww, I guess even your best impression wasn’t up for much, huh Vladdie?” Danny teased and Vlad’s eyes narrowed, before his smile flashed back, sharp and venomous.
“I shall certainly send you some pictures at my earliest convenience, Jason. Do you have a card?” He asked sweetly, looking from Danny directly up to Jason’s face.
Jason stifled a snicker.
“It’s not the eighties. Gimme your phone, I’ll add you.” He held out a hand, half expecting Vlad to refuse.
Surely he didn’t make his money and build his evil empire by being stupid. But no, Vlad gave him a calculating look and then handed the device right over.
Didn’t even try and look at the screen. And, well, Jason was a Robin once. Even Danny grabbing for the phone didn’t stop him, raising it above his reach.
Type his email with thumb swipes so it took half the time, turn on bluetooth, pair to Tim’s phone, get the ping for the downloaded app, bluetooth off and he handed the phone back to Masters, back on the contact screen.
“Here. That’s my private email, so don’t go giving it out to all and sundry,” he added as Danny tried to flap the phone from his hand.
“Aw come on Jason! You can’t give him that, he’s evil!” Danny whined, and Jason put his free hand directly in Danny’s face and pushed him away like he’d do Dick.
“You wanted to talk to Selina, you filthy fucking hypocrite.”
“Who wanted to talk to me?”
And speak of the devil, here she was, slinking towards them in one of her tight black dresses, short hair cupping her face.
Vlad shifted to let her join them, making a face when she stepped too close and stepping quickly away.
Jason closed his lips on a grin. Hope he didn’t have anything too precious in those pockets. Luckily his phone was still in hand, now tucked into a different pocket.
“I did,” Sam said loudly before anyone could interrupt, turning and bestowing her sweetest Manson Party Smile on her. “I heard you have baby photos of Jason.”
Selina raised an eyebrow as Jason made a half hearted grab for Sam, cocking her hip and smirking at him.
“Why darling, I most certainly do. And you are?” She asked, gaze darting around the group.
Sam stuck out her hand to shake.
“Sam Manson. This is my date, Danny Fenton, and my… friend, Jason Todd,” she introduced, jerking her thumb at the boys in turn.
Vlad cleared his throat, and promptly regretted it when Sam smirked.
“Oh, and this asshole is Vladdie.”
Vlad shot a glower at her while Danny and Jason snickered, turning to offer Selina his own hand.
“Vlad Masters, Daniel’s godfather.”
Selina took his hand delicately, a sharp smile on her face as she shook.
“Oh, so you’re the one who’s been snatching at the little Waynes! Have you come to make a grab for Jason?” She asked with a barely hidden glee, and alright, maybe she could stay.
Vlad’s poleaxed expression would make up for a lot, then he snapped too and snatched his hand away.
“I most certainly… oh… well. I. Suppose there was one incident, but I’d hardly call it grabbing,” he admitted with ill grace, smoothing down the front of his suit.
Selina’s smile spread and she pointed discretely towards the refreshment tables.
“Oh? Poor Tim has had to get an ice pack I hear, and someone said that you were behind Dick’s sudden disappearance. I’ll have to warn you that the last one left is Damian and he has a reputation of his own,” she purred.
Vlad’s brows furrowed into a deep frown, clearly not sure how to handle this situation. Being the focus of the gossip was apparently a change for him.
Jason was almost jealous, but the sheer joy of watching Selina at work washed it away. Not being the focus of all the gossip was a fun change for him.
“Damian Wayne?” Vlad asked, glancing back at Jason. Like Jason was about to help.
“He bites,” Jason explained casually and Danny fucking cackled, falling forward into Sam.
“Oh… oh Vlad… Vlad please… go bother Damian,” Danny gasped as Sam caught him, and Sam smirked.
“Would you turn down your Wayne scholarship?” Sam asked wickedly and Vlad’s head snapped around so fast he must have cricked his neck.
“Your what?” He asked sharply as Danny sucked in great lungfuls of air, finally straightening.
He was in no fit state to answer so Sam took over, smirking at Vlad.
“Oh, part of why Danny came is because he won a Wayne scholarship,” she said with a smug confidence Jason had to admire.
And join in on, since it was upsetting Vlad so much.
“Yeah, Brucie just loves to provide for underprivileged youth. It’s how we got my newest brother Duke,” he explained with an offhanded shrug, and oooooh he could almost see steam flying from Vlad’s ears.
His glare snapped back to Danny himself, who was just barely recovering.
“Then I suppose it’s a good thing I was here to defend your good name to Brucie,” Vlad spat the words like they tasted bad and that sent Danny off again.
“Aww, Vladdie, you do care,” he giggled, pulling himself back up and wiping at his eyes.
Vlad’s expression contrived to somehow become even more constipated. He turned deliberately back to Selina, his smile decidedly pinched now.
“And you know the Waynes well, I presume?” He asked, doing his best to pretend none of the younger three were grinning at him.
Selina cocked a brow, clearly clocking the interaction and filing it for later, a slow smile curling her lips that Jason fucking recognised.
“Oh, I know Brucie quite well,” she purred, one hand coming up to cup her elbow while she toyed with her hair, “I couldn’t paw-sibly miss the chance to greet Jason.”
Which, honestly, Jason considered mild for her. Vlad’s brows furrowed in confusion this time and Sam covered her mouth with her hand.
Selina tipped Jason a wink and he rolled his eyes good naturedly.
“Couldn’t miss the chance to fuck with Bruce, more like?” He asked dryly.
It wasn’t that he specifically didn’t want her there. Fuck, anything keeping Bruce off his ass was a win.
It was more that putting her next to Danny was probably an incredibly bad idea. His eyes had lit up - thankfully not green - and he grinned back at her.
“Well it is the purr-fect opportunity,” he said gleefully and Sam groaned.
“So this is how I die. Fantastic,” she snarked as Selina’s smile spread and she turned to face Danny more directly.
“But of course, anything fur family,” she agreed genially.
Vlad was beginning to look annoyed too, and Jason decided that was enough to tip him over into enjoying it. Not joining in; he wasn’t Dick.
Fuck.
Dick was here.
Biting down the urge to look around, Jason took a deep breath. Dick was probably still in the back. Probably still having hysterics.
What had Vlad even said to him?
Whatever it was, Jason might owe him a thank you for getting Dick out of the way of this particular meeting. All three at once would be…
Yeah, no, creepy castle in Wisconsin won if only because Jason had fucking always wanted to cause mayhem in an actual castle. Wayne Manor was fine, but an actual castle?
It might have battlements. It definitely had a ghost and a half.
Danny and Selina were clearly having fun, going back and forth with increasingly over reaching cat puns.
Jason took advantage of the moment to casually reach behind Danny and entwine his hand with Sam’s. She started a little, glanced over, and made a show of almost-but-not-quite pulling away.
Keep the show going. Apparently they were competing with Vlad for the spot of Top Scandal, which was just fucking great. No matter who won, they couldn’t lose.
Selina must have noticed though, because she gave him a sly look and gently broke things off with Danny.
“Not to pussyfoot away, but I do need to steal Jason for just a moment darlings. Old family friends and all that,” she added, tipping Danny a wink as he chuckled.
Jason gave her a wary look for a moment, then followed her a short distance away. Staying far enough back to be out of pickpocket range.
“What did you do?” He asked quietly once they were out of earshot, pausing at another potted plant. Appeasing Ivy, or a subtle invitation.
Selina gave him her most innocent smile, leaning up against the pot.
“I may have upset Bruce a little, and now he’s looking for you. He was going to the back rooms first but that shouldn’t take him long.”
Jason remembered watching Cass drag a wailing Dick to the back rooms.
“He might take longer than expected,” he noted with a half smirk, then shook his head. “So why’s he looking for me?”
He couldn’t think of anything Selina might do that would have Bruce hunting him down; usually the response to Selina turning up was to usher the kids away.
No matter how old those kids were.
Not that any of them actually wanted to stick around, just. It was dismissive at best.
Selina smiled fondly and patted his cheek, and for once the emotion seemed genuine.
“Jason, darling, no man likes to think their little boys have grown up. And of course I assumed that if you were making this much of a scandal this early on it was intentional, so I told him you had an orgy in the back rooms,” she finished bluntly, shattering the soft moment Jason didn’t know how to handle.
Rather than stammering or shutting down over emotions he wasn’t sure he could face, a startled laugh shot down his nose.
“You fucking what?!”
“I told him that when you five snuck off for your little chat earlier you’d been caught with your pants down,” Selina explained casually, an entirely catlike smile of satisfaction on her face.
And yeah, okay, maybe Jason was reminded why he liked Selina. For all the distance between them, she’d never stopped treating him as Robin.
She and Bruce might be on again off again, but she’d always be a cool stepmom to the birds. And she could be relied on to join a good joke…
Leaning in, Jason lowered his voice.
“You’re absolutely right, targets are the Manson parents, Bruce, and Vlad. Do you need to be filled in?” It had been a while since he’d done a speed debrief, but at least Selina had received a few.
And recreationally hung out with Harley Quinn. Her eyes sparkling with mirth, she shook her head.
“Oh not at all, darling. You know I pre-fur a surprise. Is the young Miss Manson in on it?” She asked, gaze sliding back across to the others.
Jason snickered, letting his eyes follow hers. Vlad seemed to have swanned off somewhere, and Danny was vainly “trying” to recapture Sam’s attention.
“Sam called the hit. They insist she has to find an eligible bachelor, so she’s got two,” he added, and Selina’s smile took on a decidedly nasty edge.
“Well then you’d best get back there and woo her, hadn’t you?” She cooed, long fingers gently patting Jason’s cheek again as she straightened to slink back into the party. “I’ll tell Bruce you’re at the refreshments.”
Jason hurried back to Sam and Danny, not exactly keeping his head low, but folding himself in a little. Hanging out with Superman and Clark Kent taught a guy a few tricks.
Catching his companions by an arm each, he leaned in to whisper,
“Selina told Bruce we’ve been having an orgy in the back rooms, she’s gonna be running interference and get him to the refreshments,” he explained quietly.
Sam snickered and shook her head, tugging her arm from his grip but allowing him to take her hand instead.
“So is she in on it?” She asked quietly, sharp eyes glancing around the party. Jason shrugged.
“I didn’t tell her much, but she’s always down to cause trouble of one sort or another. Wanna look for your parents and be conspicuous?” He asked Sam, grinning.
A grin spread across Sam’s face too and she nodded, giving him a nudge with her shoulder.
“Your family is fucking ridiculous, Jay.”
Which wasn’t news, but it was nice when other people noticed.
“We’re not really the ones to talk,” Danny pointed out with a grin of his own, coming around to take Sam’s other hand, “dare you to trip me in front of the Mansons, Jason.”
And if there was one thing Jason had gotten in trouble for all through his life… he could never resist a dare.
**
When did everything go so wrong?
It had been such a lovely evening, and yet out of nowhere, everything had turned on its head.
People were whispering about him, as they usually did, but now it was with giggles! Mockery hidden behind a hand, a glass, some ridiculous fan.
They tittered as he passed, closed their circles and turned their backs, or even moved away from him! He found himself suddenly alone, a room full of people exquisitely aware of his presence and avoiding it.
As if he were somehow beneath them. As if they had any sort of high horse to hold over him. And all for what? A mild misunderstanding?
It was something he’d always noticed about Gothamites, when he’d met them away from this dingy city. The way they considered themselves superior, above the rest for being a bloated parasite class in a jumped up hellhole.
Talking as if they personally were made stronger by all of those rogues, the darkness, the gothic nonsense. As if their city would protect them when even their Bat sought to bring them down.
Corrupt, stinking, filthy wretches. It was why it had never bothered him to avoid the den itself.
Oh, there was abundant ectoplasm, the misery and terror of millions saturating the air to almost Amity Park standards. So many people, crammed together, living in fear every day of their lives.
It made their hope powerful, those who lived at street level. Those who actually faced the city’s dangers. But these inept plutocrats? Cushioned with wealth and corruption and casual evil?
Their city hated them almost as much as Vlad. Would be happy to see them and their pathetic little Court fall. Maybe then the place could finally breathe.
They should count themselves lucky Vlad was above sinking to their level. Restrained himself to icy smiles and remembered faces, adding to his list of those to exploit.
Perhaps that would make Daniel happy; he and that goth girl were so in favour of the working class. A little redistribution of wealth (and some to himself) could be a nice gift.
Of course, if he actually thought about it, Vlad had a pretty solid guess of when the night had left the rails. He never should have grabbed the young Drake, thinking he was Daniel or not.
Frankly grabbing Daniel had been one of the habits he was intent on breaking, but it had just… happened. Force of habit was an irritatingly powerful thing.
They had always had a very physical relationship, and wasn’t that part of the problem? Vlad had never intended that.
It was just that the boy didn’t listen. Wouldn’t see what was good for him, no matter how clearly it was shoved in front of his face. He was independent, wilful, and while those were good traits…
Daniel also insisted on using them against him. Against himself. And Vlad… well, Vlad knew he had a temper. And frankly, so did Daniel.
They butted heads and with their shared abilities, sometimes that got explosive. But those same abilities were how Vlad knew that no matter how much they fought, they would be pulled back together.
And now there was a new halfa. For a supposedly rare occurrence, it was really becoming increasingly common.
Perhaps that was worth testing too. If something about the modern world made it easier to create a new halfa.
Not that young Jason was quite finished yet, he wasn’t a fully formed ghost, but Vlad could already taste the power in the air around the boy.
Not being alone had been all he’d wanted for so long.
And, apparently, something Daniel had been craving in an entirely different way. The air between the boys had been charged with more than just Daniel’s little flare of power.
Vlad wasn’t quite sure where the need to mention Daniel’s photos had come from; he’d never planned to let the boy know he had them.
It had been an idle curiosity, years ago now, and they’d never come to fruition. But seeing Daniel so obviously interested in young Jason…
Vlad was sure he’d looked at Madeline like that all the time, back at school. And far more lucky than he, Jason seemed to return the interest.
Daniel moving to protect Jason, put himself between them, had been expected. It was his nature, dear boy, and as foolish as it could be he stuck to it.
Jason refusing to allow it, moving Daniel behind himself? Surprising, and entertaining. If not for himself, he’d have thought those protective urges helped to form a halfa.
And, of course, it was rather telling.
Whatever Daniel had told him that made Jason see Vlad as a threat, Jason saw him as a threat to Daniel, not himself. That could be useful too.
Vlad would rather be a threat to neither of them if they’d just learn to listen. All he offered was a gift, and all he asked was to not have it tossed aside.
All he wanted was a family. And while he certainly wasn’t yet as desperate as Brucie Wayne, adopting any child he found on a street corner… perhaps the other man did have something to teach him.
With any luck they would still be able to have their private meeting. Vlad could only hope that the impression he’d managed to make would be enough.
The man doted on his sons, and Vlad involved in upsetting two of them? No, he would have to tread very carefully here.
Some form of apology. Not tonight, not while the issues were still… fresh. He would have to steer clear of the Waynes for the rest of the evening.
And think of some suitable way to show his contrition.
The younger boy was interested in technology, wasn’t he? His interest in Tucker would be explained there. And Vlad had plenty of technology beyond the power of science alone.
Yes, some form of gift for Timothy. Nothing too closely related to ghosts, but that was only a brief limit.
And perhaps it would be a way to soothe Jason too. For him to see that Vlad was sincere, that he did not intend to be a threat.
Why, maybe even something to protect the boy. A personal shield, perhaps. That should please such a protective soul.
Richard would be harder. Perhaps Vlad should have avoided the topic altogether, but he hadn’t realised the boys had been close.
By all accounts Grayson had precious little to do with Brucie around the time of Jason’s adoption, and while there was never any negative publicity, they rarely appeared together.
Not the way Grayson could now be seen fawning over all of his other siblings, draping himself over them and teasing whenever possible.
Perhaps Jason’s death had been a catalyst for him.
Not that it mattered. Even if the young man’s hysterics had been at least partially overblown (it certainly hadn’t followed through to Vlad’s enhanced senses), the message was clear.
And he’d gotten the answers he needed anyway.
Perhaps something equally overblown in return, Vlad mused with a slight smile, ignoring the other guests flowing around him.
Flowers wouldn’t please most young men, but the goal wasn’t actually to please Richard. He might appreciate a dramatic gesture in return.
And the man was a police officer of some sort. Something for his station.
Yes, no need for the evening to be a total loss. There would be the meeting with Bruce, and perhaps he could even persuade the man that he wished for his help to make amends.
As frustrating as this little setback was… this was still his day.
**
Tucker had absolutely no idea why Sam always complained about these parties, because he was having the best night of his life.
He’d met Tim Drake-Wayne! Actually hung out with Tim Drake-Wayne! WAS STILL hanging out with Tim Drake-Wayne!
And he got to piss off Vlad, eat fancy food, make his mom cry with pics of him in his fancy suit… Yeah, it was the best day ever.
Tim had taken his jacket off a little while ago after they’d bumped into Vlad, and while they’d joked about rigging him a sling for the rest of the night, it’d be taking the bit a little far.
It had also given them an excuse to hang out away from the crowd for a while and just talk tech while Tucker iced the “wounded” shoulder.
As expected, Tim Drake-Wayne was beyond brilliant. Most CEOs had no idea what the departments who actually worked for a living did, but Tim?
Tim knew about every single project going on in R&D. He knew what all of them were doing, and he seemed impressed that Tucker kept up with as much of their testing as was made public.
Remembering which bits still weren’t technically public yet was a little trickier, but he didn’t want to make a bad impression.
Hiring the hacker who broke your system was a movie bit, not real life. But, Tucker did hope that if he could impress Tim tonight, he’d at least remember Tucker’s name when the job faires started.
If Danny and Jason hooked up, maybe he and Tim would get to hang out at other events in future.
Because yeah, Tucker dug the new halfa. He did. Jason was funny, cool, pretty considerate, and just immediately down for Team Phantom’s fuckery in a way few people were.
Hell, he’d gotten Tucker a party ticket at pretty near the last second for Tucker to have this, the best night of his life. Tucker loved the guy, for all he’d known him for about a weekend.
But.
He did suffer from not being Tim Drake-Wayne. Like a lot.
It was probably something he heard way too often though, so Tucker was never gonna mention it.
Cuz yeah, Jason might be entry number four in a species that no one had thought was possible, but like.
Tim Drake-Wayne.
It just wasn’t a fair contest.
Tucker hadn’t clicked with anyone this fast since the day he met Danny in first grade too. He’d known Tim Drake-Wayne would be brilliant, obviously.
The guy was the next best thing to Batman himself, and was even mentioned occasionally in some of the Oracle-spotting groups Tucker frequented.
(Not that he could be Oracle, of course. While Tucker would put money on Oracle being in Gotham, Tim had way too much public presence.
He had a busy, often public job, but Tucker was just dying to ask if he’d ever done custom work for Oracle themself. Not on first meetings, though.
Had to find out if the guy was In The Know or not first. There were some theories that he was good enough to be a Robin, but Tucker didn’t really follow Gotham’s vigilantes.
More likely they just bought - or were given - Wayne tech and talked to the Oracle themselves.)
But really, Tucker hadn’t expected Tim to be so funny. He reminded Tucker of Danny in that way, always ready with a quip or a one liner.
They cracked each other up, and even now that they were back recirculating Tucker barely noticed who Tim was introducing him to.
All rich folks, the Mansons’ level or higher, most old enough to be their parents if not their grandparents. All making boring, prim and proper conversation.
The room might as well have been empty of everyone but Tucker and Tim. He didn’t even bother keeping an eye on Vlad, though he and Tim had exchanged grins as they watched the slowly expanding circle now following the man wherever he went.
Vlad was Danny’s problem. Tonight, all Tucker cared about was spending time with one of his own personal heroes.
Right up until he opened his mouth and fucked it up.
“Yeah, I was gonna stay at MIT over the holidays, there were some cool experimental tech meet ups planned? But I’m glad I wound up going home. It would have sucked to miss this!”
Tim stared at him for a moment, then actually laughed, which kinda surprised Tucker a bit. He hadn’t been joking?
And Tim clearly saw his confusion, patting Tucker companionably on the back.
“Sorry man, it’s just… you’ve gotta be the only person I know who doesn’t hate these things with a passion,” he explained, still grinning fondly.
Tucker cocked his head, frowning thoughtfully.
“What? Why not? The food’s great, dressing up fancy is fine once in a while, and the company…” he trailed off, cheeks heating just a little as he considered how to end the sentence.
He didn’t wanna wind up sounding like Danny. That would be way too embarrassing.
Luckily Tim didn’t seem to mind, grinning and giving him a cheeky nudge. Hopefully he wouldn’t notice the blush so much on Tucker’s cheeks.
“Oh trust me, this is definitely the best gala I’ve ever been to too. I’ve never had half this much fun before, cuz the company is usually waaaay more…” he waved his hand, gesturing to the small chatting groups they were wandering past.
All older, stuffy, boring… yeah. Fair.
Tucker grinned slyly at the other man.
“Well I’m glad I could liven up your evening, but Jason already told us you’re here to scout out Danny,” he teased, and Tim laughed again.
“Yeah, that probably woulda made top five anyway,” he agreed easily, “but you shoulda seen Damian’s first party. Demon brat was still half feral, he challenged a guy to a duel for calling him the “little Wayne”.”
Tucker laughed as well, glancing around the hall just in case the littlest Wayne should appear. No such luck.
“I can’t say I’m surprised,” he agreed with a broad grin, “he seemed a little short tempered.”
Tim nodded cheerfully.
“Oh he’d take your fingers off if Brucie hadn’t convinced him it was undignified to bite. His mom was one of those… what you’d call old fashioned. Very big on family honour and defending it at all costs.”
Tucker whistled long and low, shaking his head.
“Yeah, can’t say I’ve seen much of that… not as much as Danny, but you met Vlad,” he added with a snicker and Tim chuckled and bumped his shoulder.
“Yeah, well. I’m still glad you came. Do your family live near by or did you have to fly in?” Tim asked cheerfully and Tucker laughed.
“Nah, neither, Danny picked me up.” And then Tucker froze.
Right.
Yeah.
Cuz you couldn’t just say “my friend the Ghost King came and picked me up, we portalled through his private dimension”.
Not to a stranger.
Tim looked momentarily confused. As one should, when someone made no fucking sense.
“Danny? Does he fly?” He asked, and Tucker hid a sigh of relief under a huff of laughter.
“Well I’m not really supposed to say,” he whispered, leaning in close so as not to be overheard, “but let’s just say not officially?”
**
Team Phantom Group Chat
‘TechMasterF: so for all future interactions Danny you have an illegal pilots license. Can the GAV do a plane?’
‘TechMasterF: doesn’t matter I’ll say it can’
**
Jason had not been in the back rooms.
There also hadn’t been the kind of scuffing that would indicate… activities from a group of more than two people, but that didn’t put Bruce’s mind at ease.
There were plenty of ways to hide such things, and he had endlessly drilled his boys in being discrete.
If only he’d done a worse job.
Prowling around the party, he kept his genial smile on as a matter of course, chatting as he passed but never stopping. He had to find his son.
He’d run into Dick on his way out of the back hall, half burying poor Cass in his loud sobbing. Seeing an opportunity, Bruce had pulled both aside for a quick debrief.
Apparently Masters had run into them as well, and had actually dared to ask the question he’d heard circling the room all evening.
Jason’s funeral.
No one else was going to, thanks to Dick’s antics.
It didn’t make Bruce feel any better, since neither of them seemed to have noticed whatever Tim had seen. Both had seen Jason, still with the youngest Manson and this suspicious Danny.
Bruce hadn’t waited beyond that, though he trusted Dick’s quick warning that Masters had a bad reputation. One that Bruce had heard too; his business dealings were notoriously predatory.
Whatever leverage he held over former partners, Bruce wouldn’t allow him to get it over his family.
However the man was also known to be a brilliant scientist and engineer, and clearly had an interest in Wayne Enterprises. Bruce could take advantage of that to gather information on Danny.
Finally, finally he spotted the familiar white flash of Jason’s hair in the middle of the floor. He was accompanied by Sam and a scrungly young man with dark hair and blue eyes.
The mysterious Danny.
Time to say hello.
Bruce began to move purposefully through the crowd, not being obvious in his staring but keeping them in the corner of his eye.
**
“Oh shit,” Sam hissed suddenly, grip tightening on Danny’s arm, “Bruce is on his way.”
Danny’s eyes widened and he didn’t quite look all around, but only just. He looked to Jason instead.
“Do we wanna do this now?” He asked, shaking out his shoulders like they were talking about an actual fight.
Jason paused and mulled it over. Dinner would be starting soon, and honestly? If they held Bruce off til then, he couldn’t come for a “private chat” for at least another two hours.
Which would be pretty fucking funny. Especially since Selina had been winding him up.
On the other hand, Bruce wouldn’t have more than ten minutes to interrogate them, and Jason could wind the man up himself.
Jason leaned in until his lips almost brushed Danny’s ear, voice low so they couldn’t be overheard by anyone but Sam, who also leaned in.
“How much do we look like we’ve been passionately making out?” He asked softly, wicked glee in his voice. At least, that’s what Danny thought he said.
It was a little hard to focus with his breath tickling across sensitive skin.
Sam stifled a laugh but Danny almost missed it as he glanced over, catching Bruce Wayne’s eye. And the sudden, intense glare.
A startled squeak slipped free and he grabbed Jason and Sam and vanished.
At least Jason wouldn’t see him blush.
**
Across the hall, Damian’s eyes narrowed.
He’d gotten himself a good vantage point, half way up the stairs so that his relative height wouldn’t be against him.
He could see the whole hall clearly, easily able to track Todd and his cohorts. The dramatics reminded him of one of Todd’s books too, so he was sure the man was having the time of his life.
Right until Fenton grabbed both of his companions and all three disappeared. As if they’d just turned invisible.
Fenton was some form of meta. And something had startled him. Tracing back along the direction he’d been facing, Damian caught sight if Father.
Talking to the Kyle woman.
**
“Selina,” Bruce acknowledged, attention snapped away from Danny Fenton as Selina slunk up to his side, her smile wide and satisfied.
“Bruce. I thought I should come and let you know about the mood in the room,” she purred, hand slipping through his arm.
Eyes narrowed, Bruce glanced up to where Jason had been. His face much, much too close to Danny’s.
All three young people were gone.
Sighing softly in irritation, he returned his attention to Selina.
“Oh? And what is that?” He asked, trying not to let his annoyance rub off on her. She couldn’t have known.
Selina smiled up at him, her other hand coming up to pat gently at his chest.
“Rumour has it Vlad Masters is after your Jason. He’s invited him back to his castle to “get to know each other a little better”,” she purred, fingers flicking against him for the air quotes.
Bruce’s eyes narrowed.
“Why?” He asked sharply, now sweeping the room for Masters’ ponytail.
Selina shrugged elegantly, tweaking his tie before moving back.
“Who can say? Perhaps he’s after the same thing as the Mansons, hoping Jason and young Danny will hit it off. Perhaps it’s a little more… personal,” she mused, a half smile on his face.
Bruce’s expression pinched tighter for just a moment, but he didn’t bother pasting a smile back on. He was allowed to be worried for his son.
Especially if a man old enough to be his father was inviting him away.
“And what did Jason say?” He asked half to himself rather than to her, once again furiously searching the crowd for Jason.
Selina shrugged again, also scanning the crowd.
“Well, he’s been keeping himself quite busy with the small town guests. Perhaps he’s growing tired of Gotham,” she mused, watching Bruce from the corner of her eye.
He knew he twitched. Kept the rest of the response under control.
He wasn’t sure which was worse; Jason building a harem, being courted by an older man, or just plain wanting to leave… no, none of it was good.
The worst part… was that Bruce wouldn’t blame him.
Jason couldn’t be allowed to leave. He just couldn’t. No matter what else happened, Jason needed to be close enough for his family to keep an eye on him.
However good he thought his control of the pit was, it kept slipping. And the chances that Jason would do some serious damage were bad enough in Gotham itself, never mind across the country.
Gotham held so many bad memories, too many of them Bruce’s own doing. Gods, he wished he could safely let Jason go and get him out of that environment. Somewhere far from bad habits.
Though Jason was reluctant enough to leave just Crime Alley. He loved Gotham, and always had, despite what it had cost him. At least if he wanted to leave, Bruce had a plan.
And the fact that he actually would prefer it if Jason were just sleeping around… wasn’t one Bruce was prepared to deal with. He would absolutely not be admitting any of it to Alfred.
Looking back to Selina, his eyes narrowed.
“That wasn’t an answer. Why would Jason want to leave Gotham?” He almost demanded, stepping into her space this time.
Selina did not look impressed, lips pursing and a single brow rising pointedly as she looked him over.
“Why, I don’t know, Bruce. Can you think of anything that might be making him feel unwelcome? Unappreciated? He never did like the limelight,” she remarked coolly, and that cut deeper than her claws.
“The gala was his idea,” he tried to defend himself, not thinking about the first part of her question. Jason had wanted his official life back.
Selina tutted softly, reaching up to pat him on the cheek. That was her slightly pitying smile too.
She knew him far too well.
“You know you won’t get his motivations from talking to me, Bruce. If you want to know what Jason’s thinking you’ll have to ask him yourself. Today’s probably a good time,” she added slyly, half turning away, “after all, you know how soothing a little… exercise can be.”
And then she was gone again, swaying away into the crowd. Bruce took a moment to collect himself before following, closing his eyes and drawing in a deep breath.
It would be fine.
He’d been planning his speech for tonight for weeks. Since Jason had first voiced the idea to Dick.
Bruce knew he was no good at bearing his soul. Open heart to hearts with his children had always been his greatest struggle, and he knew it weighed on them all.
He loved them with all of his heart, and it was maybe that which made it so difficult to just… let himself be vulnerable. He never knew what to say. How to express the depths of emotion.
But he would fix that today, he’d promised himself. He would tell Jason how much he loved him in front of the world.
**
Narrowed eyes being the only outward sign of irritation, Damian hurried down the stairs and through the crowd.
There was no point going directly to Father; he would likely be distracted with the Kyle woman for a while yet. No, he had to find one of his siblings.
Surely one of them had noticed. Todd was to be the center of their attention for the evening. One of them must also have been watching when he disappeared into thin air.
Grayson first, he decided, ducking and weaving between the much taller adults. He was the most competent, and the most invested in Todd’s new behaviour.
Grayson must have seen.
**
Danny gave Jason and Sam an embarrassed grin as he popped them back into visibility behind a plant.
“Sorry… Bruce caught me looking and I kinda panicked?” He offered sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck. It was kinda adorable.
Sam rolled her eyes and flicked him upside the head.
“Dude, you’ve gotta learn to chill. One day someone’s gonna see that,” she reprimanded him.
Jason cocked a brow, resisting the urge to pat himself down and check he was tangible again. They’d gone directly through more than one guest on their way to a quiet corner.
“Does this happen a lot?” He asked dryly, fighting down a smile. It was quite possibly the funniest startle response he’d ever seen.
Danny’s cheeks flushed and he looked away, pointedly looking at the floor.
“Not so much any more?” He offered, and Sam snickered.
“He told you how many times he phased through glassware when he first changed, right?” She teased. Danny gave her a half hearted shove and she laughed, shoving back much harder.
Jason did his very best impression of innocence, raising both hands.
“I’m gonna plead the fifth. We should go make sure we’re spotted though, just in case anyone saw,” he added, giving the room another quick scan.
There was no real commotion, no one looking this way and that like they were trying to find someone.
It might be okay.
**
Damian caught up to Cass and Dick just as Dick was wrapping up a particularly colourful story about repainting the manor that was probably at least half true.
Cass wasn’t completely sure, but it would explain the rule about paint rollers being used from the floor or not at all.
Damian was frustrated though, all tight and tense and trembling with self satisfaction. Which wasn’t actually all that unusual, but she wouldn’t say it.
He walked straight up to her, full of determination.
“Cain. Grayson. I need to speak to you,” he demanded bluntly, ignoring the two couples still laughing over Dick’s story.
Cass and Dick exchanged curious looks, and Cass shrugged. Dick turned back to their audience, grinning broadly.
“Well, big brother duty never sleeps. We’ll see you around!” He declared with a jaunty wave, turning to follow Damian. “What’s up, kiddo? It’s nearly dinner time.”
Damian gave him a scathing look and Cass hid a smile. None of them did well with stuffy parties.
Once the youngest decided they’d come far enough from listening ears, he stopped and turned back to hiss.
“Fenton is a meta. He and perhaps Manson as well. I saw them disappear in the crowd.”
Brows furrowed, Dick glanced to Cass again. She frowned, thinking back to what she’d seen of both Amity Parkers. There hadn’t been anything out of the ordinary in their body language.
Unless you thought they were supposed to be civilians, but that wasn’t strange. Not in her circles.
Damian was sure though, so she shrugged again. Dick turned back to Damian, grinning consolingly.
“Hey, I know it’s embarrassing, but Jason’s always been a sneaky bastard. It’s not a big deal to lose them.”
Which was the other option. But the way Damian’s eyes narrowed, anger cranking up and then being choked back down… he was sure.
“I did not say I lost them, Richard! I said I saw them disappear. In front of my eyes. Whether it was some teleportation or just invisibility, I saw them,” he spit out, giving them both a fierce glare.
Cass hesitated, glancing across the hall.
It was… busy. Not exactly packed, but there were enough people, the patterns too random to predict… no.
She’d have noticed someone invisible stepping their way through. There were ways one had to move to avoid being struck if no one could see you.
In a place like this? Not even she would try it in the middle of the floor. This was where you took the high road, or hugged the walls.
Looking back to her brothers, she carefully signed, her body hiding her hands from the crowd.
‘Teleport. Where?’
Dick accepted her analysis as simple fact, frowning thoughtfully and looking around. Damian looked viciously gleeful to be vindicated.
“If they’re still here, it’d have to be short range. Probably somewhere quiet, somewhere they’d been. How long ago?” He asked Damian, and the boy didn’t even glance at his watch.
“Not more than three minutes. You are easy to find.”
“I’m not trying not to be, Dami,” Dick corrected easily, looking around the hall again. “Odds are they’d have gone for the back, so we’ll head that way.”
Which was a really solid plan. Until they stepped back into the crowd and immediately ran into Jason, Danny, and Sam, talking to Tim and Tucker.
**
Bumping into Tucker and Tim had been a fun coincidence, and Danny wasn’t about to miss the chance to catch up. Sure, they’d not been apart long, but a lot had happened.
First of all…
“What happened to your shoulder Tim?” Jason asked “innocently”, something just on this side of sincere worry in his eyes.
Tim made a face, rolling his shoulder and carefully cupping it.
“Oh, nothing. Just a bit of an overenthusiastic greeting by someone called Vlad,” he said nonchalantly, shooting Danny a sly smile. “He thought I was someone else.”
For just the briefest second, that hot flare of Obsession hit Jason again. Protect-mine-how dare he.
But Danny was used to those kinds of reactions; mostly from personal experience. If he even thought his friends were hurt in an attack, things got… intense.
He let his aura spread enough to stroke across Jason’s again, not moving closer while they were the center of attention. He felt the flash of surprise, and something… else?
Something softer, none of the alarm he’d felt when he’d filled the room. He stroked calm-safe-amused-he’s faking back anyway and watched Jason’t shoulders settle.
Felt a wash of embarrassed-amused-sorry more directed his way, and smiled to himself. Jason was getting good at this pretty fast.
Sam, Tuck, and Tim had kept the conversation going while they had their little halfa moment, chatting just a little louder than they should about Tim’s encounter.
Just so their neighbours could hear them without having to strain, of course.
That would be rude.
Slotting back into the conversation was easy, and honestly? Tim was also a pretty cool guy to hang out with. Danny was a little surprised by how much fun he was having.
It just went to show, the galas of nightmares could be pretty fun with friends.
There was definitely something about to start though, because people were beginning to move more pointedly towards the large doors opposite the stairs. The dining hall, if Danny remembered right.
Right. Dinner.
It was probably that which brought Damian, Dick, and Cass to join them. Dick launched easily into the story of their own encounter with Vlad and okay, being funny as fuck clearly ran in the family.
Damian was a little off though. Until he actually met Bruce, Danny couldn’t say for sure, but for now? Maybe the Waynes were just the unfunny ones.
That or something was bugging him, because he had a tight frown on his face. And… was… kinda staring at Danny.
Half an eye on the kid, Danny casually shifted away to the right. The glare followed, so yeah - gonna say that was for him.
It was kinda cute really. For all the kid wanted to play tough guy and pretend he didn’t care, he basically radiated a protective suspicion for Jason.
Danny had to admit he’d been weird enough when he thought anyone was threatening Jazz or his friends, so he couldn’t complain. Just felt strange to be on the other side of.
Just as they were approaching the wide open doors, the Mansons popped up again, absolutely beaming to see Sam surrounded by the full crop of Waynes.
“I’m so happy to see you all getting along, poor Samantha does get so lonely at these events sometimes,” Pamela trilled happily, patting her daughter on the shoulder.
Sam, Manson Party Smile in place, glanced at the hand like she was seriously considering biting it. Danny hid a grin of his own.
“We’re sorry to break up the party, but we should be getting our two off to our table,” Jeremy explained, giving Sam a beaming smile and pretending Danny didn’t exist.
Jason cut in immediately, bestowing a charming smile on both of them and offering Sam his hand. Which she gave a sidelong look to, then slowly took.
Pamela’s eyes all but whirred like camera lenses as she locked onto the gesture.
“Actually, I was just about to invite Sam to join me at our table? And Danny too of course,” Jason added as an afterthought, also not looking for Danny.
For the best, because he wasn’t sure he could hold in all the giggles. No chance of the Mansons noticing anyway, because they were on cloud nine.
“Oh, how wonderful! It would certainly give you some more time to get to know each other,” Pamela gushed, the hand on Sam’s shoulder giving her daughter a sudden little shove closer to Jason.
As if there was any chance she might have missed the super subtle parental semaphore all evening.
And Sam deserved an Oscar.
Glancing up to Jason, she let the Party Smile slip more into a real, shy one, quickly looking away like she didn’t want to be caught looking.
“Yeah, okay. Sounds good,” she said quietly, her grip tightening just a little.
If Danny hadn’t known she’d never been shy in a relationship in her life he could have easily bought into this Bridgerton bullshit. As it was, he and Tuck exchanged grins, wishing for popcorn.
Jeremy took his wife by the arm before she could dissolve into delighted tittering, inclining his head to the group.
“I’m sure we’ll see you after dinner then. Have fun,” he told Sam, and for just a moment he sounded so sincerely proud that Sam’s grip tightened in Jason’s.
Then they were gone and she groaned melodramatically, dropping said hand and glaring at Tucker and Danny.
“Not a word,” she snapped, eyes narrowed. Both boys immediately raised their hands in abject surrender.
“Whatever would we even say?” Tuck asked innocently. Beside him Tim snickered.
“That your parents clearly read even more period romances than Jason?” He offered, and Sam’s eyes narrowed at him instead.
Then she huffed, folding her arms and dragging Jason’s hand into the crook of her elbow.
“Yeah, yeah. Get me to the table. At least I don’t have to listen to them gushing for an hour,” she grumbled, actual sadness flicking across her eyes.
Jason slipped his hand free and before she could protest, wrapped his arm around her shoulders.
“C’mon, let me tell you about all the times Timmy’s fallen asleep at gala dinners,” he said innocently, shooting a wicked grin at his younger brother as he turned them away to keep walking.
Tim’s smile dropped immediately as they begun to walk, hurrying around so he could glare at Jason and walk backwards.
“Don’t you fucking dare Jason. I still have pictures of the Discowing incident,” he threatened, and unfortunately for him only made Jason grin broader.
“You did, until Babs owed me a favour,” he teased back and Tim’s eyes narrowed, hands jumping to his phone.
“Fuck off she did not, she wouldn’t,” he grumbled as he fell behind, Dick landing a companionable hand on the back of his neck to steer him along with them.
“Discowing incident?” Tucker asked, hurrying up on Jason’s other side.
Jason glanced back over his shoulder, smirking at Dick and Tim.
“Family game night. The loser has to suffer some humiliation, and when I lost they got me one of Nightwing’s old costumes to wear for photos. The one with the v-neck,” he added for explanation.
Coming up on Sam’s other side, his hand in the small of her back, Danny damn near tripped over his feet. He’d have fallen if Sam hadn’t caught him, a smug smirk now on her face.
At least she was feeling better.
Behind them, Dick rolled his eyes while Tucker went searching on his PDA.
“Hey, I still say that was a cool suit. More interesting than all the black spandex the rest of the bat brigade mainline,” he protested, making all three of his brothers scoff.
“Then why did he stop wearing it?” Steph asked, materialising from nowhere to toss an arm around Dick’s shoulders, just as Danny asked,
“Isn’t Nightwing’s current costume mostly black?”
Even Cass giggled, which Danny had already decided was an accomplishment. Dick gave a few half hearted defences while the others needled him, and Tucker made a triumphant noise and passed his PDA to Sam.
She angled it so Danny could see and he had to clap his hand over his mouth to keep from laughing.
“He fought crime in that?!” He exclaimed through his fingers, and Sam raised a pointed brow at him.
“Batman’s underwear are on the outside and this is the line?” She asked sarcastically, then turned and grinned up at Jason. “So when are you introducing me to my new best friend Babs?”
They’d reached a large oval table now… right in the front and center of the room. Right. Wayne table, Jason’s gala.
They were gonna have an audience.
Jason chuckled and grinned down at Sam, moving to pull out a chair for her just off center.
“Absolutely fucking never unless you swear to forget all you’ve heard,” he promised as the rest of his siblings minus Cass rushed around for the other side of the table.
Sam snorted a laugh, taking the seat and letting him tuck her in.
“Look at what I am fucking wearing. Give me the disco suit and I’ll wear that with pride,” she pointed out, gesturing to the mass of bows.
Dick won the race, by diving into the seat Tim had just pulled out and locking his legs underneath it. He leaned immediately across the table and grinned at Sam.
“Are you busy tomorrow?” He asked with a mischievous glint in his eyes. Steph dropped down to sit beside him.
“We could go later tonight?” She offered, and both laughed when Jason flicked a napkin at them, taking his own seat.
“You’re both the fucking worst, and Babs has shit on you too,” he reminded them, with no real effect.
Danny took a seat Sam’s other side, Tucker winding up beside Danny on the curve. That left Tim with a seat almost half opposite Tucker, on the other side of the round.
Further from the main action, but honestly, he took it with good grace. Better than Damian, who despite having the seat on Dick’s other side, near the middle of the table, was still sulking.
Maybe because he’d had to wait for a new chair to be brought? Cass had the other new chair, at Jason’s other side.
No one seemed worried that they’d left the table unbalanced, mostly down at one end.
A couple of attendants had already hurried over with three extra chairs, disappearing again for place settings as the Waynes passed cutlery around.
Danny figured this was what throwing the party (and having more money than your average country) did for you. People didn’t make a fuss when plans changed.
The hall was still pretty loud, people finding their seats and getting comfortable. Across the table Dick leaned forward, grinning broadly at Sam and Danny.
“So, we know about Sam and her folks. What about you, Danny? Do you have any family nearby?” He asked, ignoring a warning look from Jason.
Danny appreciated it, but he didn’t really mind. Odds on, he’d be getting to know Jason’s family better at some point. They seemed pretty close.
“Nah, my sister’s studying psychology in Star City and both parents are still in Illinois. We sort of spread out.” Not least so both he and Jazz could have some time away from home.
Time to pretend to be normal. And somewhere nobody knew the name Fenton.
Dick nodded cheerfully, but Danny didn’t miss how both Damian and Steph’s eyes had narrowed. They were gonna remember what he said for later.
Fun. Maybe he should be doing some interrogating back.
Dick had already moved on though, still with that charming smile.
“Can’t say I know much about that, the furthest I got from home was Bludhaven,” he said companionably, tugging Damian in for a hug. “Can’t let the little ones do without their biggest brother.”
Damian squirmed viciously, sputtering protests, and Steph laughed and pulled Dick into a headlock.
“Jason’s bigger,” she teased, and Danny couldn’t help glancing over from the corner of his eye.
Jason was a lot bigger. In just about every direction. To be fair, Jason was bigger than some cars.
Dick squirmed free with surprising flexibility, releasing Damian who huffed and corrected his outfit immediately. Danny figured it was as good a time as any to do some sleuthing back.
“Bludhaven, huh? What do you do there?”
“I’m a cop,” Dick answered with an easy shrug. “I guess I got in the habit of wrangling these little bastards.”
Sam snorted a laugh beside him and Danny hid a grin in his hands. He was probably gonna regret that.
“You grew up in Gotham and became a cop?” She asked, heavy with derision. Beside Danny Tucker snickered, leaning over to whisper to Tim.
“And you thought you had it bad before.” Which, yeah. ACAB was Sam’s other favourite mantra after Eat The Rich.
Dick shrugged again, not losing his cheerful grin yet and spread his hands.
“That’s kinda why I did it. There were always so many corrupt cops, I wanted there to be at least someone that people could count on,” he explained like it might save him.
Sam stifled most of the second laugh.
“Oh, sorry, I thought you said you became a cop, not a firefighter. Is he a snitch too?” She asked Steph, who looked like Christmas had either come a little late or extremely early.
“Not to Bruce, but he did threaten to arrest me for parking near a fire route,” she said with a wicked grin.
Decidedly pouting now, Dick threw both hands into the air.
“I was kidding! I didn’t actually arrest her!” He argued as the rest of the table booed. Even Damian.
“Just another corrupt cop,” Sam sighed, shaking her head. Dick opened and closed his mouth a few times, then frowned.
“Wait so I’m a snitch if I do arrest people and corrupt if I don’t? How am I supposed to win?” He complained, the pout still mostly playful.
Sam stared him dead in the eye, devoid of mercy.
“Not be a cop.”
Dick groaned dramatically and Steph laughed, reaching over to pinch his cheeks.
“Hey, we told you when you joined,” she pointed out cheerfully and Dick sighed.
“Well, yeah, but the system’s not gonna change if no one ever does anything, is it?”
Tucker and Danny exchanged looks. Grins. And were slightly surprised when Jason beat Sam to the punch.
“Corrupt systems don’t change from the inside, Dickie,” he said with a smirk. Dick pointed an accusatory finger at him.
“Hey, you can’t talk. He likes Red Hood,” he explained as an aside to the Amity Parkers as if it might help his case.
Jason spread his hands, grinning.
“Hey, I came from the Alley, I’m allowed to appreciate a guy cleaning it up. Which the cops never even tried,” he added smugly. Dick huffed.
“Red Hood killed people.”
“So do the police,” Sam pointed out with a smirk of her own and Dick deflated.
“Red Hood stopped,” Jason joined in, jumping on the moment of weakness. “I bet his bodycount is less than Bludhaven PD’s.”
Steph and Tim both snickered at that, although Danny wasn’t quite sure why. It seemed a little more innuendo ridden than just enjoying Dick’s suffering.
And Jason’s cheeks definitely pinked. But he ignored them. Yeah, Danny had some follow up questions for later.
From Jason’s other side, Cass signed something that Danny couldn’t quite catch from this angle, but Steph nodded quickly.
“Yeah, good point Cass. She wants to know what you guys think about vigilantes,” she explained, looking expectantly at Sam.
Who frowned for a moment, then shrugged.
“At least they’re getting something done. But someone needs to look into Batman hoarding children,” she said dryly, and most of the table snickered.
“I think most of them follow him,” Tim pointed out in an effort to be fair. Steph and Jason both made faces at him and he flipped them both off.
“But do you have a favourite of Gotham’s vigilantes?” asked Dick, leaping onto the subject change with both feet.
Danny cast a quick glance at Jason, but he looked about as entertained as the rest of the table. It must have been something they talked about a lot.
Or the rest of the Waynes were the rest of the bats. But Danny didn’t want to assume… unless it would be funny.
Without the key of Jason’s old Robin connection, Sam and Tucker probably wouldn’t get there.
Sam was pursing her lips, probably thinking about her options. She’d know more of them than him or Tucker, but Danny figured he knew most of the big players.
“Black Bat,” she finally decided, leaning back in her seat, “but Batwoman definitely fucks.”
This was met with general agreement, Danny frowning for a moment. He’d not had many bat sightings since moving to Gotham, but…
“She definitely says fuck,” he agreed with a snicker. Sam punched his shoulder.
“You can’t talk. Who’s your favourite, new town boy?”
Rubbing his arm and feigning great injury, Danny stuck his tongue out at her. Thought for a moment longer.
“Signal’s pretty great,” he decided, tipping his chair back for a moment to frown at the ceiling, “I passed by the mall after a rogue attack one time and he was teaching the kids to do flips.”
“After the rogue was in custody?” Steph asked, but she was still grinning. Danny shrugged.
“I dunno, I don’t talk to cops.”
Dick let out another wounded groan and Sam snickered, then leaned forward to look at Tucker.
“How about you?”
Tucker hesitated for a moment, clearly torn. Then he visibly drew in his courage and looked around the table expectantly.
“Have you guys heard of the Oracle?” He asked, voice heavy with anticipation. The surrounding Gothamites stilled, watching him expectantly.
Sam rolled her eyes.
“If you’re not wearing spandex are you even a vigilante?” She asked dryly. Tucker flipped her off.
“Hey, Oracle’s done more for this city than any of the bats! More for the whole world!”
“It’s a legend in the hacker community,” Danny “explained”, keeping an eye on Dick and Steph as the two opposite him. And less obviously hacker connected.
If they were the bats and Oracle existed, they’d know.
“They’re a master hacker that can break any system, any time, and gathers all the evidence to put people like Roman Sionis behind bars,” Tucker said, taking over the explanation.
With his usual dramatic aplomb, planting both hands flat on the table and leaning forward impressively, his voice low and conspiratorial.
“No one knows who they are or anything about them. You just find their tracks sometimes, especially when there’s a really big rogue attack or someone gets busted too soon.”
“Sounds kinda like a rumour,” Dick offered with a small shrug, glancing at Tim. “How about you, Tim? Have you heard of an Oracle?”
Tim hesitated for a moment, just long enough for Steph to snicker.
“Guess if there is one they don’t bother with Bludhaven PD,” she said smugly, dodging when Dick swung half heartedly at her. “Police brutality!”
Dick groaned whole heartedly as the others laughed, sinking back into his seat.
“But seriously, why doesn’t anyone like Nightwing?” He grumbled, arms folded as he pouted at his siblings. “He was on the scene before it was cool.”
‘Before he had to be cool,’ Cass signed, shuffling a little further around the curve of the oval so the rest of the table could see her.
Dick’s head snapped up when Steph and Sam laughed harder, pouting at his sister.
“Hey! Not fair when I’m not looking!”
‘Pay attention then,’ she signed back, her expression all sweet and studied innocence.
At the other end of the table Tucker decided to take a little pity on the guy.
“Nightwing’s okay. I liked that suit,” he said with a shrug and a grin. Dick straightened in his seat, grinning over at him.
“Finally, a man of distinction and taste!”
“Cops don’t get opinions,” Sam smirked, leaning forward to grin at Tucker, “so what’s your excuse?”
Tucker stuck his nose in the air, pointedly looking away from her.
“We’re not all goth, Sam. Some of us have heard of colours.”
“Spoiler wears purple,” Tim put in helpfully, pulling up a picture to show him. Tucker leaned in for a moment, then nodded.
“Yeah that’s pretty cool too. Capes are in,” he added, shooting a meaningful look at Danny. Who rolled his eyes, both hands in the air.
“And when they come in for those of us not wearing identity obscuring masks, I’ll wear one,” he replied dryly. Tucker pshawed at him, waving a hand.
“You’re in Gotham, how weird would it be?” He asked off handedly. Danny sighed and then looked pointedly around the rest of the table.
“Weird?” Steph offered, shrugging.
“Pretty fuckin’ weird,” Jason agreed and Danny folded his arms and grinned at Tucker.
“I’m not breaking my win streak by letting some rogue mistake me for a bat. You wear a cape while you’re here,” he said, sticking out his tongue.
Whatever Tucker was about to say was lost when Dick sat up sharply, face bright with renewed enthusiasm.
“Wait, Danny, does that mean you haven’t been in a rogue attack before?” He asked eagerly, which was just a little too fucking weird.
Even weirder, the rest of the Gothamites looked equally excited. Even Damian managed a smug anticipation around his piercing stare.
Danny felt kind of like he was in a freak show display case.
“Uh… yeah? But I bet loads of people in Gotham haven’t and it’s only been a year…” his excuses were immediately batted away as Steph clasped her hands in front of her.
“Oh that means tonight is gonna be your first! That’s so exciting!” She squealed happily.
Danny and Tucker gave her weird looks, but to their surprise it was Sam who answered, sighing and leaning back in her seat.
“At least one rogue always attacks a gala,” she explained, waving a hand around them, “it’s all of Gotham’s wealthiest in one place. It’s why we don’t come here much,” she added, eyes narrowing in frustration.
Beside her Jason frowned down at her. Probably trying to work out the frustration.
“Because they don’t think it’s safe? One of the bats always deals with it,” he added when Tucker and Danny still looked confused.
Sam snorted and shook her head.
“Because they think I’ll start something during the attack,” she huffed, folding her arms and glaring at Tucker and Danny. Daring them to comment.
Tucker, unafraid of death with Danny between them, snickered.
“You’ll finish something during the attack,” he corrected, ignoring the suddenly concerned looks from the Gothamites.
Sam’s eyes narrowed further but she let the comment stand. Steph leaned forward a little, looking nervous for the first time.
“It’s usually better not to get involved?” She offered, sounding almost apologetic. “The rogues can be pretty dangerous and you don’t want to call attention to yourself.”
“I doubt that would be an issue,” Damian snapped, eyes narrowed as he trained that glare on Sam instead of Danny.
She stared him down, then nodded sharply.
“He gets it. Anyway, you don’t have to worry, I got the lecture half a dozen times when we flew in. “No punching assholes, or any criminals”,” she mimicked her mom’s perky tones, heavily sarcastic air quotes stretched alongside.
Stifling a grin, Danny suddenly noticed something.
“Hey wait, I didn’t get the no punching speech?”
“Maybe they’re hoping you die in the rogue attack,” Tucker snickered, shooting Jason a sly grin.
There was, predictably, that Obsessive flare of protection-guard-still funny and Danny kicked Tucker under the table for it.
He already wasn’t happy about the whole Fright Knight thing, better not to belabour it. Almost before he reached for Jason, he felt the other man reaching back though.
Grinned in spite of himself at that first careful brush.
Safe-home-I’m fine
Smug-strong-damn fucking right you are
“They’d be a little late to that request,” Danny shot back at Tucker instead, even as he winced from the kick.
About half the table groaned, which Danny personally considered unfair, since the Gothamites hadn’t heard his death jokes before.
Right up until Tim ran both hands through his hair, looking from Danny to Jason in amused exasperation.
“Great, there’s two of you. Are bad puns a side effect of the Lazarus pit too?” He asked dryly.
“No because if it was puns, it’d be Dick,” Jason shot back just as fast and Dick groaned, letting his head flop forwards onto the table.
“Did I just not get the memo that it’s “Bully Dick Day” or something?” He moaned plaintively, still overacting enough that Danny wasn’t worried they’d actually upset him.
And when Jason leaned over and flicked the top of his head, equally unconcerned.
“Consider it revenge for almost a decade of godawful puns, Dickiebird,” he told him bluntly, and Dick groaned louder.
“Betrayed by my own brethren… abandoned by my flesh and blood…”
“We are not your flesh and blood,” Damian reminded him sharply - and possibly unwisely, since it prompted Dick to flop over onto him instead and wail louder.
“Denounced! Deserted! Thrown to the gutters!” He howled at increasing volume.
Damian threw all attempts at dignity to the wind, struggling to fight his brother off without falling out of his chair. Dick just threw more of his weight over, both chairs beginning to rock dangerously.
There was now muffled laughter from more than just their own table in the background. This only seemed to encourage Dick, right up until someone cleared their throat into the microphone.
Damian took immediate advantage of his hesitation and shoved Dick off him and to the floor. Danny and the rest of the table looked up into the surprisingly stern face of Brucie Wayne.
Who then smiled.
“So, with that bit of rough housing out of the way… I promise I will let you all get to your meals shortly, but I have a couple of things to say first. I’ll do my best to keep it short and sweet.”
Dick scrambled back into his seat and Danny glanced along the table, wondering what was going on. The party was just to show Jason was back, right?
Jason was sat right here.
And had apparently caught wind of his confusion, catching his eye and half smirking.
“It’ll be a couple minutes. Then I have a speech, then we’re done and it’s just food, more socialising, and shaking hands with 90% of high society,” he explained quietly, leaning down to Sam and Danny as Bruce spoke.
Sam didn’t seem concerned, so Danny settled in as well to watch. There might be some fun baby Jason stories.
And y’know? It was a pretty standard speech. Talking about his beloved son, how hard it had been when he was gone, how happy Bruce had been to find him.
Danny found himself glancing over at Jason a couple of times, the beginning of a smile tugging at his lips. Jason looked mostly unmoved, smiling along at appropriate points, but not engaged.
Until.
“And I can only say how sorry I am that I wasn’t there when he needed me the most,” Bruce ended softly, eyes meeting Jason’s from the podium.
The younger man went white so fast Danny almost thought he’d transformed. Sam’s nails bit into the table.
“That’s the first time he’s said that, isn’t it?” She snarled, just low enough to go under the genteel applause all around them.
Danny flicked his aura out across Jason and he visibly started, then turned to glance at them. Nodded once. And started to stand.
Sam’s hand snapped over like a whip before he’d pushed the chair back, her voice low and deathly serious.
“Jason Todd we met today but if you go up there right now and say anything even like that you forgive him, that man is leaving here tonight in a Fenton thermos.”
Danny rolled his eyes, leaning over and nudging his hand under hers as the applause began to fade, eyes beginning to turn their way.
“Can’t put living humans in the thermos, Sam,” he hissed, sending a gentle pulse of reassurance-calm-we’ve got you through his fingertips to Jason.
The other halfa looked surprised for a moment, then shot him a grateful smile, hand turning to touch both of theirs as he rose. Sam turned her fixed smile on Danny, now holding both of their hands.
“I did not say he would still be living, Danny,” she said firmly and Jason stifled a laugh, his aura brightening to amused-shocked-touched.
Beat the hell out of the gaping, painful hole it had been. Danny caught his fingers for a last second before Jason pulled away, grinning at them both.
“I appreciate the backup, but I’ve got this. I know how to handle him,” Jason said softly, coming around behind their seats.
One hand brushed across the back of Danny’s neck, though who he was grounding Danny couldn’t say. And as he moved up to the podium himself, Danny damn near believed him.
Couldn’t argue with the open sincerity Bruce was putting out either though.
Tugging their hands back off the table, he leaned in to whisper to Sam.
“The fuck was that about? At least he finally said sorry?”
Sam closed her eyes for a long moment, visibly reigning in her temper.
“I fucking hate that manipulative bullshit, Danny. It’s the same crap as a public proposal; he gets to be the good guy, and all the pressure is on Jason to act the right way, do the acceptable thing, or he’s the villain. It’s fucked up and it’s a cruel way to force the answer you want from someone if you don’t think they’d give it,” she snarled, eyes still fixed on Bruce as he moved to the side of the stage.
Danny stared at her for a long moment, then sunk back into his seat, Tucker visibly deflating alongside him. He’d never thought of it like that.
Tucker let out a low, uneasy whistle as Jason took the microphone.
“Sooooooo, note for Val, no public proposals?” He offered in a whisper, and Danny giggled in spite of himself.
Sam kicked him in the shins, fighting her own smile, still staring at Jason.
“Shut up.”
**
Jason was gonna buy Sam a coffee. Six coffees. Maybe more.
He just… he’d seen Bruce’s speech. They’d read each others, both gone through them with Alfred to make sure they were concise, charming, and appropriate.
Bruce had asked for his green light on every story.
The apology hadn’t been in it.
Fuck, his head was still spinning in a thousand different directions and he could barely even feel the pit. He felt shocky, shaky even now, going through the motions.
Smile and wave.
He didn’t know what he’d have said or done if Sam hadn’t grabbed him. If he could have said anything at all. But it had helped. Brought him back to himself.
And an imminent offer to murder Bruce, which he sorely appreciated even if he was pretty sure Bruce hadn’t actually been hoping to force him into anything.
The guy was a master manipulator of his own image, but… he wouldn’t do that to them. To any of his children, no matter how much Jason sometimes doubted that he still counted.
There was something in the way their eyes met, the way his voice softened even on mic. A tenderness that Jason actually believed, in spite of himself.
And how fucked up was that, that it was easier for Bruce to say sorry in a mask, in front of a couple hundred people, than just to Jason alone? That it took a crowd for him to admit he’d failed?
No. Jason wasn’t going to forgive him. Not the easy out of a public reconciliation and then everything going magically back to normal.
Fuck, he wanted to. Wanted to fall into Bruce’s arms, be fifteen again when his dad was always right and strong and had all the answers.
Wanted to say the words and have the fairytale moment.
But even without the pit screaming bloody vengeance he knew it wouldn’t be true. Saying sorry was never what he’d wanted from Bruce, and he hadn’t expected it.
He wanted to know he’d mattered. Wanted to know that Bruce had cared, had learned, would never put a fucking kid in that position ever again.
Bruce was more careful now. Tim and Damian and Steph had an extra full book of rules on top of what Dick and Jason had made.
But he still wouldn’t make the hard choices. Still looked down on Jason for taking someone at their word when they said they’d never change, that it’d take death to stop them.
They still had a fucking lot to talk about, even if Jason had stopped killing.
Bruce hadn’t looked away the entire time Jason made his way to the podium. At least, not unless he’d done it in those seconds with Sam and Danny.
He’d moved back and away, giving Jason his space, and he appreciated that. He even managed a small, slightly strained but genuine smile as he stepped up to the mic.
“And on that cheerful note…” he let himself trail off, pulling his own less practiced but still perfect Party Smile on, letting the room in on the joke.
Laughter broke out quickly, breaking the tension that maybe hadn’t all been in Jason’s head. Looking back at Danny, Jason could swear he felt the other man’s relief wash over him.
He was fine. He could make a joke.
Part of him wanted to change his own speech, something to acknowledge what Bruce said, something to throw him off like he’d done to Jason.
But Sam was right; Jason had deserved to hear those words alone first. In private. And when he was ready to move on, that’s how he’d tell Bruce.
Honestly his mind was empty anyway. It was hard enough to remember the practiced speech, and letting himself sink into the familiar words helped steady him.
His speech was shorter. Bruce told their “story”, ostensibly to spare Jason from painful memories. All Jason had to do was say how glad he was to be back.
Talk about all the things he wanted to do for kids that hadn’t gotten as lucky as him. The things he’d do with his second chance… third chance in the eyes of most of the room.
Name a couple of generous future donors Tim had helped him select for bleeding hearts and a love of attention. Although… that’d be an opening.
Hiding a smirk behind the practiced smile, Jason looked around the room until he caught sight of the older Mansons.
“I’ve been thinking a lot about the future,” he added, just at the end of his own speech. Made eye contact with both, looked to the front table, and smiled at Sam.
Yeah, this’d give Bruce a fucking heart attack too. That’d do.
“There’s so much I’ve missed. I don’t want to miss out on anything else. I intend to take every chance this new life gives me with both hands. Especially when it brings new… friends.”
He lingered over the pause, enjoying the way Sam’s grin turned fucking feral. Let his gaze drift sideways to Danny, who had both hands clapped over his mouth to muffle his laughter.
Figured fuck it.
And blew Sam a kiss.
**
Danny stilled, something pinching suddenly tight in his chest.
He’d seen Jason’s lips before. Pretty much every time they’re together, honestly, they spent a lot of time talking. They have so much to talk about.
He’d already seen them laugh, smile, pout, pulled tight in a snarl. All sorts of expressions, and he can just about remember watching old clips of Robin.
Same expressive face, even around a mask. There’s a weight there now that Robin never had though, even when he got more violent.
Dying changed people, and there weren’t many people in the world who knew that more intimately than Danny. Being a teen superhero wasn’t easy either, but being a dead teen hero…
Honestly it was a distinction they shared with way too many of the other young heroes, and Danny got why Jason fucking hated the very concept.
It aged you before your time. Showed you sides of the world no kid should see. Gave you the chance to keep other kids from having to.
Danny thought he’d seen pretty much everything the living world had to offer. The good, the bad, the ugly. But now he was here, looking up at his new friend, and it felt like he’d never seen him before.
There was a part of him that wanted to see Jason smile more, to see the weight lift from his shoulders.
There’s a part of him remembering those lips next to his ear, warm breath stroking across him but not closing the gap.
There’s a part of him that wondered how, even after all he’d been through, Jason still had those smiles in him.
And there’s a part of him as he watched Jason press his fingers to his lips that wondered if they could possibly be as soft as they looked. If Jason had leaned just a hairsbreadth closer…
And yeah, he was going to be denying ownership of every single one of those parts, thank you very much. Especially the one that flickered with just a hint of jealousy.
Jason was a damn fine actor, that much had been clear right from the start of the evening. This was all just for the bit.
There was nothing to be jealous of.
He just. Hadn’t noticed Jason’s lips before. How soft and full they looked, how a smile curved them into something beautiful.
He realised he’d been staring when he caught Jason’s eye, saw those smooth lips twitch into a wider smile. And then Jason was making his way down from the podium.
Back to the table.
Holy fuck Danny was gonna need to be able to string a coherent sentence together by the time he arrived. Even with Sam and Tucker, with Jason’s siblings responses of glee and laughter…
He might not make it.
He just kept getting distracted in the curve of that mischievous smile.
———————————
Biggest thanks to @lehana37 and @wolfjackle for helping me out when I got stuck on this one! It turns out the answer to tricky scenes is still “And then Catwoman was there”.
This last scene is for @jotaroslooseeyebrowhair 😁
Next:
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billysgun · 6 months
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smitten
billy the kid x fem!reader |requested!|billy is still love-sick for you with your new domestic life and baby boy|
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the baby stirs in your grip softly, a grin spreads on your face as your infant sleeps soundly in your arms
you turn as the door opens, billy takes his hat off and a wide smile finds his lips at the sight of you two
"how was your ride?" you whispered. billy often rides into the meadows -sometimes turning for the town if you need anything- after he left his outlaw life behind and married you. he's a cowboy at heart, though, so he rides almost every morning
"it was great," he said, voice low, he moved toward you pushing a loose strand of your hair to the side to get a good look at your face
"you look gorgeous" he whispered, a smitten look deep in his eyes as he moved down to kiss you
still as lovesick as ever, you melt into the kiss, and the baby in your arms whines at your attention moving and billy makes sure to greet him too
"hey little cowboy" he whispers and kisses the top of your baby's head, the infant's eyes barely open to see his dad
billy impossibly grins wider once your baby boy smiles at him, their matching eyes filled with love as billy scoops him up
"did you sleep good last night?" billy babbles to the baby,
"I'll make breakfast while you too talk" you giggle as you make your way to the kitchen, billy follows as the mumbles to the child
"mama's gonna make us some food. you'll help her one day so pay attention"
he narrates your movements to your baby, as you fry a few eggs your eyes drift to your husband and you couldn't help your heart as it swelled at the sight
this tall, threatening-looking man with a gun on his hip rocked your baby ever so softly with a love-filled grin plastered on his face
"I love you" you told him, he looked up at you before stepping closer to kiss you slowly
"I love you more than you could ever know"
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an: thank you for the request! <3 I love love love the simple life with billy 🥺🫶
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rafeandonlyrafe · 10 days
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5 4 3 2 1
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words: 1.3k
warnings: 18+ only, smut, p in v sex, unprotected sex, cockwarming, established relationship, countdown, edging
“here ya go baby.” rafe says, tossing you the sweatshirt he just took off.
“huh?” you question, but tug the sweatshirt on over your head. rafe always made fun of you for stealing all of his clothes, and you don't know why he's now so willingly handing it over.
“since im going out of town.” rafe explains, coming over to press a kiss against your forehead as you relax on his bed. 
you pout, gripping onto his hand so he can't move away. “don't remind me.”
rafe is going on some business type trip with his dad, only for a week, but it'll be the longest you've been away from each other since you began dating. 
“sorry, baby.” rafe says, moving to kiss your lips. you melt against the bed, cupping rafes face and running your thumbs over the smooth planes of his cheeks. you groan when he pulls away, cutting off the kiss.
“i have to pack.” rafe explains, heading into his closet and reemerging with his suitcase, setting it on the edge of the bed and opening it up.
you wrap yourself in his sweatshirt, inhaling rafes scent as you chat idly while rafe packs, trying to keep your mind off him actually leaving.
“rafey.” you whine when hes all done, suitcase stuffed full and zipped up by the door, ready to be loaded into the car.
“what is it honey?” rafe asks.
“can you come cuddle with me?” you question, knowing you're going to be deprived of his arms around you for an entire week and want as much as you can of him before he goes.
rafe smiles gently, loving how obsessed with him you are. “of course.” rafe says, pushing the covers down so you can get comfy against the sheets before easing himself in next to you, pulling you into his arms.
“im gonna miss you so much baby.” rafe says, placing a hand on your bum, squeezing it against his palm.
“if i can't sleep while you're gone, can i come and sleep in your bed?” you question. you still live separately from rafe, but often spend your nights together, neither of your parents caring since you're both adults.
“yeah, of course.” rafe says. “rose and wheezie will be home, but you know they don't mind.” rafe says, and you hum in agreement, making a mental note to hang out with wheezie while rafe is gone, maybe take her shopping or to the movies.
rafe moves his hand to your hip, pulling you so your crotch is slotted over his. you adjust yourself, squirming until you get comfortable with one leg slung over his hips.
“stop moving like that unless you want me to fuck you.” rafe groans, trying to keep to just cuddling like you requested, but struggling when you're moving right against his crotch.
you look up, a sly look on your face. “i always want you to fuck me.” you push your core against rafe, grinding your hips down.
“oh, fuck.” rafe groans, pressing his head back against the pillows as he eyes flutter closed, his mouth dropping open.
you continue to move against him as you feel rafe harden, his impressive length swelling in size.
rafe tugs at your shorts, hating the physical barrier blocking him from having you wholly.
you push them down your hips, kicking them further into the blanket to be taken care of later when you aren't solely focused on rafe and getting him inside of you.
“god, gonna miss this baby.” rafe grips your ass, his hand covering your whole bum. 
“you sure you can't sneak me with you?” you whine, continuing to grind against him as rafes hand pushes underneath your underwear.
“i don't think ward would go for that, but i want you to call me every night.” rafe tugs your underwear to the side, fingers swiping through your folds.
“oh, that feels good.” you moan, warm and happy now that you're snuggled up under the blankets with rafe.
“gonna feel even better when i get inside of you.” rafe hums out, finger moving to your clit, focusing on it as his eyes drink in the sight of your head tipped back, eyes closed and mouth slung open with pleasure. 
“i love you.” rafe mumbles, presses kisses along your cheeks and over the bridge of your nose.
“you softie.” you giggle at the side of rafe only you get to see.
“there's one part of me that's never soft around you.” rafe guides your hand to his obvious bulge before immediately going back to stroking your clit.
you laugh again as you push away his shorts and underwear until his cock is able to spring free. you wrap your hand around the base, holding there for a moment, teasing rafe like he so often does to you.
“baby-” rafe groans out, but then you're moving your hips and sinking onto his cock.
“shit!” rafe groans out, his other arm that was wrapped around your body pulling you even closer to him.
“not gonna be able to go a week without this.” you whimper, beginning to rock your hips back and forth, the side position forcing you to keep the movements slower.
“ill come back and fuck you for hours, promise.” rafe hums out, not wanting to think about leaving either.
“you do that anyways.” you chuckle.
“yeah, you're right.” rafe smiles at you before suddenly thrusting forward, burying himself hard and fast inside of your pussy.
your eyes close again as he picks up a steady pace, fucking into you with no qualms about anyone who might be roaming the hallways and listening in on the sound of slapping skin.
“so tight and warm for me.” rafe grunts, shuffling his shorts and underwear a bit further down his legs so he can better fuck you.
“all for you.” you place a hand on rafes cheek and bring his mouth to yours, kissing him deeply, moans and gasps being the only interruptions to your kiss as rafes fingers continue to toy with your clit.
“make me cum, please.” you whine.
“not yet.” rafe hums against your lips. “wait for me.”
you have a problem none of your girlfriends have with their boyfriends. he's too good, too hot, and you're always ready to cum before him, whereas everyone you talk to has the opposite problem or their partners can't make them cum at all.
“can't.” you cry out, feeling how hard your nipples are as they press against rafes chest through the fabric of his sweatshirt that you're wearing, tightening your leg that's slung over his thigh to get him closer.
“you can.” rafe says firmly. 
you focus on the motion of his cock entering you, the way that your cunt stretches to allow him inside, only to clench and attempt to stop his outward thrust when he pulls back.
“5…” rafe begins to count, feeling his cock swell and knowing he can't last much longer.
“4…” he continues, fingers moving faster on your clit.
“3…” the countdown feels like it's taking hours, even though it's certainly just seconds.
“2…” rafe can feel your clit pulsing underneath his fingertips.
“1.” rafe pushes his hips as hard as he can forward, burying his cock as deep inside of you as possible as he cums along with you, your cunt clenching around him as your high causes your whole body to shake with relief after holding off.
“god, rafe!” you squeal out as he gives a few final thrusts, ensuring his seed is buried as deep as possible.
rafe pulls his fingers away as you come down from your high, head laid against his chest.
“just… stay like this for a bit. please.” rafe says, hand on your hip to keep you on his cock.
“of course.” you manage to pick your tired head up to press a kiss to his lips. “i could fall asleep just like this.”
rafe let's out a yawn just at the mention of sleep. “i certainly wouldn't say no to that.”
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nightdiary · 5 months
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last night's story | jake
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pairing: jake x female reader word count: 28.2k
synopsis: lured by the prospect of earning a couple extra bucks for the summer, you head north to man your aunt's surf shop on australia's sunshine coast. it's a visit that reacquaints you with everything you've been running from– old friends, abandoned memories, and one unforgettable jake sim.
genre: surfer!jake, childhood friends to exes to lovers, angst, fluff, eventual smut, attempt at humor
warnings: surfing inaccuracies galore, reader almost drowns, smut (fem oral receiving, fingering, penetrative sex). MINORS DO NOT INTERACT! please let me know if i've missed anything.
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Despite growing up a five-minute drive from the ocean, you’d never quite learned how to keep yourself afloat among the waves.
Looking back on it, you found it quite ironic considering how everything you loved somehow tied back to the ocean one way or another. Whether it was your vacant seaside town, the colorful dishes your aunt prepared for you as a kid, or the people you cherished most– all of it was somehow irrevocably intertwined with the water.
And yet you’d always felt an unexplainable dread when you found yourself a bit too deep in. Once past the shallow end, surrounded by erratic water and a depthless bottom, you found it hard to breathe. No matter how much you fought to stay above, there was always a tide under all the waves, seizing you by the throat and rendering you motionless.
Coming back to your hometown felt a little bit like that– diving headfirst into a swelling wave and fearing you’d never find your way back up.
The handle of the train window jams as you yank it downwards, letting out a harsh squeak when you attempt to pry it open once again. After struggling to tug it flush against the sill, you prop your elbows up on the glass and heave your upper body to lean out, careful not to lose your balance.
Outside, you’re met with the heady smell of brine and the sun’s dying rays. The rusted sign denoting your town’s outer limits flies by in a hazy whisk, followed by the first few houses and tiny streets. The sky is a brilliant blend of soft pinks and warm yellows, the horizons of which frame the buoyant ocean’s glistening ripples.
Australia’s Sunshine Coast has always been beautiful, but the prospect of returning so soon has your stomach in knots.
The loud squawk of a passing seagull startles you into ducking back into the passenger carriage. The stop coming up is yours, but you can’t bring yourself to gather your luggage. Getting off the train seems like an impossible feat when you’re practically glued to its walls, too afraid to face what may be waiting for you once you get off.
A sharp whistle resounds from the conductor’s carriage, and you hear the tracks below you screech as the train begins rolling to a steady stop. You duck back towards your aisle to tug your suitcases out from underneath the seat, palms numb as you grip their handles and wheel them towards the door. You know you can’t stay.
The world outside slows to a painful stop as the train reaches your town’s platform, and you hesitate before pushing the rotational gear to open your door. You’re able to momentarily forget about all your nerves as you struggle to haul your baggage off the carriage, too preoccupied with the fear of missing a step to look up.
Sunghoon’s waiting for you by the singular bench the shoddy platform has to offer, hands pocketed in his light-washed denim shorts. He squints at you through the last beams of the setting sun, lips pulled in an uncharacteristically fond grin. The golden light catches his face at an angle that makes him look like a ghost. He’s everything you remember and yet nothing you recognize.
“Well, well, well,” he tsks, but it isn’t unkind. Sunghoon crosses his arms and looks you over, cocking his eyebrow sassily. It almost makes you want to forego the initial jibing, but you surmise it wouldn’t be a proper reconciliation with Sunghoon without it. “Look at what the tide dragged in. Haven’t seen this species of blobfish before.”
“I missed you too, Hoonie,” you croon, abandoning your suitcase in favor of running forward and looping your arms around him. Sunghoon readily envelopes you in his hold, bringing you into his warmth with a teasing oof.
He’s soft and smells faintly of sunscreen, the generic kind you stopped buying once you moved away to Melbourne. He still holds you like you mean everything to him, and he’s still everything to you.
Pulling back, you study the grooves of his face where the sun dips into, frowning at the chiseled remains of Sunghoon’s younger self. He’s different and grown– his cheeks don’t carry the same youthful chubbiness and his eyes are sharper, nearly devoid of the juvenile spark you’d come to adore so much.
You’ve only been away for two years, and yet Sunghoon looks like a stranger.
The two of you haul your luggage into the back of his junky Toyota, flinging the trunk closed with a resolute bang and crowding into the vehicle to avoid staying out in the humidity for a second longer. The air conditioning system sputters to life after Sunghoon slams on the dashboard twice, and you sigh out of relief once you’re finally met with air that doesn’t feel suffocating.
Leaning back into your seat, you hiss when the heated leather meets the bare skin of your thighs, pouting as Sunghoon drives off from the train station.
“How was the trip in?” Sunghoon’s question is too customary, too formal, but it still distracts you from the lingering burn.
“Fine,” you answer. You pick at the stuffing that’s coming out of a rip in your seat, frowning. “There was a crying baby in my carriage and a weird stain on my seat that I hope was juice, but otherwise just fine.”
Sunghoon hums, peering at you out of the corner of his eyes. He pulls into another street and stops at a red light, tapping his fingers impatiently on the wheel and shifting in his seat. He clears his throat, uncharacteristically nervous, and finally turns his head to look at you fully, “You look different.”
“So do you!” You’re quick to fire back, feeling flustered. You gesture at him limply with your hand, unsure of how to tell him he looks nothing like what you remember. Attractive, clearly more confident in his skin, but different.
It makes you slightly queasy, the thought that in just a matter of a year or so, you’d lost track of the boy you’d called your best friend for so long. You blame it on the swaying from the train.
Your town’s small enough to cross through with a car in about 15 minutes, but it feels like you’re locked in Sunghoon’s Toyota for several hours. The burning leather under your legs doesn’t ease up, and at some point, the air conditioner stops working and starts bringing air in from outside, so it feels a little bit like hell.
As you round the corner and enter the street where your aunt’s shop is located, you feel your chest tighten with anticipation. The houses you pass are achingly familiar, with shades of blues, yellows, and reds nudging memories that you thought you’d left in the back of your mind. It feels like the neighborhood has been locked in time, put away and forgotten after you’d seen it for the last time two years ago.
But unlike Sunghoon, you find that the shop looks virtually the same as it did when you left. The relief you feel is quickly replaced with guilt.
Parking his car in front of the sidewalk, Sunghoon pops the trunk and the two of you get to action immediately. You heave out what bags you can carry, wanting to minimize your trips to the car, and waddle after Sunghoon as he goes to unlock the front door. In the window of the shop, you spot a note with Sunghoon’s loopy writing spelling out Closed, I’ll be back later!.
Entering the shop feels weird, but not in the way that you’d anticipated that it would. You’re hit with a sudden wave of nostalgia as you look around, taking in the interior of the place with a racing heart. Minus the cheap paint job in an effort to reverse the sun bleaching along the walls, you can find traces of yourself still left behind in almost everything.
By the crown of your foot, there’s a splotchy stain you’d left on the welcome mat after attempting to balance your friends’ coffee orders, too distracted to consider the fact that the cups were hot as shit. Next to you, there are markings along the door frame where your aunt had kept track of your height throughout the years, notched into the wood for you to remember till eternity.
As you step further into the shop, you spot drawings and paintings you’d done as a kid on the wall behind the register, hung up with colorful push pins. Above them, up on the shelves, there’s a potted plant you’d gifted your aunt for one of her birthdays, now much larger and with more leaves than when you had parted with it.
“Auntie kept a lot of your stuff,” Sunghoon voices your thoughts, grinning when you look up at him with wide eyes. “Most of it’s upstairs in the guest room. You’re cool with staying there, right?”
Nodding, you set your duffle bag down with a huff, rolling your neck. The prospect of going up any stairs at the moment seemed almost painful to you, but the thought of falling into bed and resting your head on something soft (and not the dingy window of a train) was too tempting to ignore.
It takes three trips in total to move all of your belongings from the car to the room you’ll be staying in, but Sunghoon doesn’t complain even once as he strains under the weight of your luggage. You gather all of your bags in an empty corner of the room, drawing up a chair to tug open the small window higher up on your wall. Outside, the sky has darkened to a deep purple, and the first stars are beginning to appear in scattered formations.
Collapsing on the bed, you shuffle around until your head hits a pillow, sighing as you sink into the soft material.
“There’s dinner in the kitchen,” he muses, “I bought it before I went to pick you up so it won’t be warm, but you should still probably eat before going to bed.”
“I should,” you sigh, heaving yourself up and blinking blearily at Sunghoon. He leans patiently against the doorframe and stares back at you, sticking his tongue out when your sleepy mind begins drifting off again. You startle, suddenly remembering, “Shit, wait. Hoon, where are you going to sleep?”
“The couch in the living room folds out, and it’s surprisingly comfy. Don’t worry,” he promises, flicking the light switch off and cackling when you squeak in surprise. “That fried chicken isn’t going to get any warmer, by the way.”
“You got me fried chicken?” You mumble as you get up, trudging after Sunghoon into the well-lit kitchen. Indeed, you find a bucket of fried chicken sitting on the counter, covered with a plastic bag in a vain attempt to keep it warm. “Fuck, I love you Hoonie. I’m so glad I came back.”
Sunghoon laughs as you pluck a drumstick off of the top and bite into it like a vulture. He leans onto the counter and continues to watch you eat, a slow grin spreading on his lips.
“Yea? I’m glad, too.”
The decision to move away was one you’d been planning since high school.
Despite containing so many places and people that you loved, you’d always thought that there was something bleak, almost draining about your town. It felt like it was slowly bleeding you out from the inside, and the choice between here and elsewhere was one that was inevitable for you to make.
Jake had always called you crazy when you brought it up, but you knew he’d never get it. His whole life was set up here. Meanwhile, you knew your existence here was only fleeting. A momentary thing, never meant to stay for long.
The logistics of it were simple enough to your sixteen-year-old self; you’d work hard to finish school with high marks, get into a university in Sydney or Melbourne on a scholarship, and leave your town for good.
But the year after you graduated high school was stagnant. You picked up a job at a seaside restaurant and focused on saving up money to afford university and move to an apartment in a bigger city. The work’s long and tiring enough to numb you for a while, but it’s unavoidable that you get sucked up in everything you didn’t manage to leave behind.
Jake’s there too, because he’s always been in every single part of your life and you can’t run from him no matter how hard you try. Freshly-single, nineteen-year-old Jake had committed himself to ensuring that you stuck around for as long as possible, even if that meant inadvertently clipping your wings by telling you he loves you.
You don’t mind it at first. It’s hard to find a problem when the boy you’ve wanted since middle school admits that your feelings are reciprocated. It’s hard to think about moving away when you’ve yearned for so long, when Jake is finally in the palm of your hand and not off with somebody else. You’d forgotten to factor him into your delicate future, forgotten that him loving you back was an option.
It’s enough for a while– even if your job is shit and every day feels like a monotonous cycle of nothing, your head’s in the clouds when you’re with Jake. You feel yourself most when you’re with him, even if you’ve begun to forget who you are without him.
Moving away is at the forefront of your mind until it suddenly isn’t– there’s something keeping you tethered down and you can’t ignore it no matter how much you love Jake.
“I don’t think I can stay here any longer,” you tell him. “I’m not meant to stay here forever, Jake. It’s not fair.”
Jake had looked at you with a tired smile, almost like he knew you two didn’t have much time left. When the light caught his eyes at the right angle, you could see that they were glossy with regret. “I know. But it’s not fair to me to uproot everything I have here. I won’t be anyone if I leave.”
And in a way, you understood. While this place was nothing to you, it was all that Jake had.
That night, you rushed home to pack everything you could fit into a suitcase and backpack. For better or worse, Jake didn’t answer when you picked up, so you left him one last token of yourself in the form of a voice mail. The final decision to move away was made on a whim, finalized with a one-way train ticket you’d bought in the late hours of the night, and you hadn’t looked back on it. Until now.
A week before you were set to finish off your university term, Sunghoon’s name had shown up on your phone at a time far too late in the evening for you to ignore. After months of radio silence, you’d been startled into picking up and stuttering your way through a greeting. You’d barely recognized his voice over the phone at that time.
He’d called with a proposition so stunning you could barely gather your thoughts before responding with a shaky yes. Your aunt had to leave her surf shop behind to get treatment, and desperately needed someone to cover while she was gone. Sunghoon had told you that he couldn’t possibly do it by himself, and he’d called the only person he knew would care so much to arrive on such a late notice.
The decision to come back was not one you’d planned for either. You’d left with the intention of staying in Melbourne until you graduated from university, and foresaw nothing that could bring you back this early. Followed by another ticket bought at an hour so late the sky outside was beginning to pinken, you ended off your last exam and left for home on the same day.
The parallels between the situations were cruel in the way that it felt like you could never really leave– something would always bring you back, no matter how much you ran from it.
The shop is drowning in the morning light when you make it to the bottom of the stairs. It’s too early for you to be up, that much is evident in the way your feet drag behind you, but you cannot afford to flake out your first day on the job. And it seems like your boss is already waiting for you.
“Mango!” You squeal, suddenly all too awake as you run to approach the counter. Your aunt and Sunghoon hadn’t mentioned anything about her cat staying behind as well.
The chubby orange cat blinks back at you unfazed, fluffy tail swishing noncommittally over the cash register. When you reach out to pet the beloved baby, he rolls over on his back and chirps while you coo over him like you’ve personally carried him for 9 months and then birthed him.
You begin setting up to open the shop for the day after you fill Mango’s bowl up and sneak in a few more chin rubs. Though you were no stranger to how your aunt ran things, you found yourself retracing your steps and looking around blankly more than once as you went through the ministrations. You felt like a ghost hovering, revisiting opaque memories and relearning how to navigate what you’d once called familiar.
Your stomach’s in knots over the prospect of having to face people you know again. Last night was different– you’d been locked away safely with Sunghoon upstairs, away from peering eyes and curious mouths. This was about to change as soon as you opened the shop.
You manage to get the doors open with only a two minute delay. No one actually enters the shop until an hour later, when you’ve cozied up behind the counter and taken to eating your breakfast. At that point, you’d shaken away some of the nerves you’d woken up with and are able to welcome the customer with a soft smile that doesn’t feel forced.
Sunghoon comes down to check on you sometime later, still in his pajamas and sporting a surprised look on his face.
“Wow, I’m genuinely shocked you haven’t destroyed the place by now,” he comments slyly, taking a loud sip from his coffee mug.
“I’m more shocked that you’ve managed to keep this place open for so long by yourself,” you bite back. When you hear the front bell chime, you immediately straighten up and call out a friendly greeting to the customer, ignoring the way Sunghoon laughs at your switch up.
He saunters over to join you behind the counter, pretending to busy himself with fixing things on the shelf while the customer pays. Once you’ve bid them goodbye and closed the register, Sunghoon rounds on you and crosses his arms, shaking his head gravely.
“You forgot to give her the receipt that the card machine printed, fucked up big time now. I should fire you.”
“If you came down here to micromanage me, I suggest you go back to sleep,” you huff, reaching out to crumple up the forgotten receipt.
Sunghoon’s face visibly softens. “Hey, you know I’m just messing around, right? I’ve forgotten receipts countless of times before.”
Humming, you begin to clear off the counter and wipe down the surface.
“Are you mad at me?” Sunghoon asks carefully, lingering next to you. “I’m sorry. We used to make jokes like this all the time back in the day, I assumed you’d still be okay with it.”
This makes you frown guiltily. Your hands pause and you turn around to look at Sunghoon fully. “I’m not mad, just a bit on edge at the moment. I’ve been a bit stressed out about this whole thing all week, and it feels like I’m going to explode if something else goes wrong. I guess all this anxiety’s been making simple shit slip my mind.”
Sunghoon nods quietly as if to urge you to continue.
“Everything is so familiar and yet it’s all so strange and I feel like I’ve forgotten everything,” you whisper, voice cracking at the end. “I miss my aunt, I miss my apartment, I miss Melbourne. I feel so silly for not coming back earlier, but I know I wasn’t ready. And I don’t even know if I am now.”
There’s a weight on your chest that’s suffocating you and making the words stick to your tongue like tar. Sunghoon’s eyes are gentle as they look into your own, understanding and patient, and you feel the guilt consume you from the inside.
“I’m scared, Sunghoon. I’m scared to see Jake again. To go outside and see everything that reminds me of him. I’m scared that I’ll have to live with this fear always, that I won’t know peace where I’m supposed to feel at home.”
You don’t realize you’ve teared up until Sunghoon quietly hands you a tissue. You wipe your eyes and laugh shakily at the incredulity of it all– you’d cried enough before leaving Melbourne, convinced you’d forget all about your worries once you were actually here. You were far from right.
Sunghoon’s warm arms wrap around you and your mind blanks for a second. He squeezes you tightly and holds you for a while, until you feel your breathing begin to even out again. Quietly, you thank him and relax in his embrace.
After promising Sunghoon you’d be fine with finishing your shift, you go back to cleaning out the counter. You only have half an hour left, but you’re determined to see it through to the end. There’s a box of inventory that needs to be unpacked anyway, and you’d rather not sit around at the register and think for a minute longer.
Once your shift’s over, you trudge up to your room and immediately slump onto your bed. It’s got a loose spring somewhere that’s poking into your thigh, but at the moment, it’s the most comfortable surface you’ve ever laid down on. You could care less when a nap is overdue.
Mango seems to have different plans, however, as he saunters into your room and meows loudly. You don’t bother to look up until he’s resorted to jumping onto your bed, incessant meowing now right under your ear. You really should’ve closed the door.
Blearily blinking your eyes open, you see that Mango has situated himself next to your bedside drawer and is preparing to jump onto the very limited surface there. Yelping, you sit up and carefully move him back onto the ground, where he can do less damage and knock over less of your belongings. He makes an angry huff, but you ignore him in favor of checking to make sure everything on the drawer’s fine.
There’s a cup that you most definitely hadn’t left. Squinting and peering inside, you find that it’s filled with tea, made from the spearmint packets your aunt used when you weren’t feeling your best. There’s still steam coming out from the top, which means Sunghoon must have made it for you right before coming down for his shift.
You can’t stop the giddy smile that stretches across your lips while you pick up the mug. As you take tiny sips, your stomach begins to warm, and the feeling slowly spreads to the ends of your being. The feeling in your chest unfurls the tiniest bit, and you surmise that despite it all, you’ll be just fine.
Working at the shop is monotonous for a while. You and Sunghoon take turns swapping shifts so that you don’t have to be up with the sun every morning, but you still keep each other company for the later ends of your hours. It’s nice to have someone there with you to fill the gaps in between the customers, someone to whine to about the guy who came in reeking of wet dog and the kid that left sand all over the floor.
Catching up with Sunghoon is simultaneously weird and the highlight of your day. You’d practically grown up with him, and yet you now knew close to nothing about him. His irregular Instagram updates were nothing to lead off on, but you surmise your own lack of social media presence must’ve frustrated him right back.
Sunghoon is more than eager to share stories from the gap in his life for which you’d been gone. You’re able to piece together who he is now with relative ease, even if you’re bridging unfamiliarities in areas you’d thought he’d never change. He’s no longer the awkward, floundering boy you knew for so long. He’s sure in himself and his actions, he’s deliberate with his thinking and purposeful with everything he tells you.
Sunghoon shares with you that he’s almost finished with his kinesiology degree and that he’s been visiting the local hospital more and more often to shadow doctors. He still wants to do medicine, just like he’d told you in high school, but he wants to focus more on sports medicine and hopefully work in therapy. He also proudly tells you that he’d recently gotten his driver’s license, despite refusing to touch a car when you were both finally old enough to drive, to which you snort and tease him with yeah, who passed ya?. 
He’s still your Sunghoon, even if he’s blossomed differently from the Sunghoon you grew up with.
Aside from him, you have Mango to keep you company. The cat barely pays you any attention as usual, instead choosing to nap in places he shouldn’t be and ignoring you when you call him for pets. But you know that behind that tough exterior, Mango loves you so.
To say you’re lonely would be untrue. Every now and then, a customer will chat you up while you’re at the register. They’re curious at seeing an unfamiliar face and you can’t blame them, but it’s sweet all the while. You get a few recognizable faces in between as well, people you went to high school mixed in with older family friends who coo at you and instinctively reach out to pinch your cheek.
It’s Jake’s face that you least expect to see in your shop. You think it’s inevitable that you’d eventually run into him, but it doesn’t surprise you any less.
You were manning the register just half an hour after swapping with Sunghoon when the bell above the door whistles familiarly. You call out a friendly greeting and look up, only to choke on the last syllable. Just from his side profile you immediately recognize him– the grooves of his face are achingly familiar and the sweet tone of his nonchalant good afternoon back is like a punch to the gut.
You know he’s likely unaware that you’re back at all, let alone working here now, but it feels oddly motivated from the universe’s side. Your stomach swoops as you watch him disappear one of the back aisles, and you have a minute to pace your breathing again before he reappears and begins approaching the register.
Your blood runs cold once he finally looks up and notices you. You think your heart’s going to beat out of your chest and fall onto the tile floor when he stops in his tracks and stares back at you like a deer caught in headlights.
“Oh,” he says surprised, mouth hanging open around the syllable. “Um, hi.”
Your lips twitch but you’re unable to utter a greeting back. Jake approaches the counter like one would a wounded animal, and you hate the way your legs jerk with the want to step back. You think you hear him say something more, but it’s masked by an echoey ringing in your ears.
“Hi,” you croak, mindlessly reaching out to what he’s placed on the counter. Your palms are sweaty and so, so cold and you can’t even feel your fingertips where they’re wrapped around the sharp edges of the box.
“It’s nice to see you again,” Jake says, but it barely registers in your mind. Despite the gaping feeling in your stomach, you laugh at the formality, some color returning to your cheeks. Jake visibly relaxes at this.
“Yeah. I just wasn’t expecting to run into you right now.” Or ever, but you think it’s best left unsaid.
Jake shrugs. His eyes roam over your face curiously and you try not to curl in on yourself. “How long have you been back?”
“Just over a week now.”
He hums, gaze settling on the way your hands fidget with the item until the scanner finally picks up on its barcode. You hurriedly place it back onto the counter and slide it toward him.
“I really do mean it, you know.”
Starting, you blink up at him unassumingly. “Sorry?”
“That I’m glad to see you again,” Jake clarifies.
“What’s all this for anyway?” You’re quick to ask instead, words bubbling out of you like a stream. Your heart’s racing pathetically and you’re embarrassingly hung up on the fact that Jake cares.
Jake doesn’t seem the least bit bothered by the change in topic. “I needed a new fin set for my board. I’ve got a few competitions coming up and figured I’d polish things up a bit.”
Right. It was no surprise to you that Jake never abandoned his love for surfing, unlike everything else.
“You should come watch me at the state qualifiers next week,” Jake continues while leaning over the counter, propping himself up on his elbows and fixing you with an impish look. You want to reach out and shove his forehead with your fingers, but you have to remind yourself that this isn’t the same Jake you’d grown up with. Whatever you’d once had was forgotten in the past.
“Sure,” you say, ignoring the nagging warmth in your chest. Feigning nonchalance, you busy yourself with tapping on the checkout screen of the iPad, if only to give your hands something to do other than to fidget with your shirt. “Me and how many other chicks?”
Jake laughs good-naturedly, but the momentary lapse of insecurity in his voice isn’t lost on you. You feel guilty for just a moment, but don’t allow yourself to dwell on it. After finalizing his order on the screen, you look up to find Jake already looking back at you, almost expectantly.
“Your total’s $270.59.”
Jake’s face falters the slightest bit, but you don’t think it’s because of the ridiculously high price. “Does that factor in the ‘good friend discount’?”
The phrase makes something sour flood in your mouth, and you resist the urge to scowl. The receipt machine prints out his total, and you rip the paper out with more force than admitted necessarily. You nearly slam it down on the counter in front of Jake, peering up at his shocked face through your lashes. “Yea? What’s my favorite color, Jake?”
Noticeably taken aback, Jake’s confident demeanor slips away as easily as a receding wave. He stutters around his next sentence, and you try not to let your satisfaction show as you open the register. Jake looks down as he counts through the bills in his wallet, pulling out several and passing them timidly across the surface. “Uh–, well, hmm. Something… blue? Wasn’t it blue?”
“I hate blue,” you spit the lie out a bit too quickly, and hope Jake can’t see right through you. You accept the bills you’re handed with pursed lips, slipping them into your register and handing back the few cents you owe him.
“You don’t,” Jake answers immediately, not bothering to reach out and pocket the change. “You love blue. Specifically that light seafoam shade you see on the shore. Said it reminded you of summer.”
Despite how much you want to disagree, your throat feels all dry and your eyes are stinging and you don’t think you can bear to look at Jake much longer without saying something regretful. But something about letting him think he still knows you makes your fists clench and gut boil.
“People change,” you say with an air of finality. “I changed. You changed.”
Jake takes his bag and steps back from the counter with the expression of a kicked puppy. He looks back at you like he wants to say something, something long left untouched, and you resist the urge to hide behind your counter and cover your ears with your hands.
You feel naked and vulnerable– like Jake has carefully stripped away every last layer of your defenses and he can see the rotting remains of everything you didn’t say. You hate how he looks at you, like he knows exactly what’s going through your mind and the inner monologue you’ve been fighting since you first met him. Like he still knows you in and out, despite moving away and changing every last bit of yourself that reminded you of him.
“Thanks for shopping with us,” the smile you give him is painfully artificial, and you shut the register with a bang that echoes around the shop. “Have a good day, Jake.”
Besides taking a trip up the coastline, there were only a handful of other things one could do in town to stay busy. You relied on the usual small-town things that somehow never got boring; going to the drive-in theater, drinking milkshakes until your jaw and stomach ached, and driving endless loops around the town.
Problem was, most of these only worked with other people. Your few options decreased even further during the summertime, when leaving an air-conditioned space was essentially a self-inflicted death sentence. Alone or not.
Living in such a small town also meant that out of the three or so choices you had, you were guaranteed to run into someone you knew wherever you went. It was one of the reasons you were so eager to leave, to finally go live in the big city where shops didn’t close at 5 and where you could go for a walk without seeing a familiar face you had to avoid.
And whether or not you dared to admit it, you were afraid of running into someone while out on your own.
You’d nearly forgotten about that aspect when coming back, only to be cruelly reminded on your first designated day off.
“What do you mean I’m not working today?” You cross your arms, frowning at Sunghoon’s figure behind the counter. “What else am I supposed to do?”
“You and I both know there’s like, only two possible answers to that,” Sunghoon sniffs, not bothering to look up at you from his phone. “And I don’t think you’d be interested in either of them.”
While true, you also didn’t want to give up that easily. “Shoot.”
Shrugging, Sunghoon finally divulges you with his attention, rubbing at his brow bone contemplatively. “Auntie Lee’s diner got a new arcade machine. Plus you never got to try that cookie dough shake she introduced after you left.”
“Cute, but I feel stupid going by myself,” you sigh. Heaving yourself up on the counter, you ignore Sunghoon’s noise of complaint and prompt him to keep going.
“Go see a movie or something?”
“All the new releases look like shit.”
“Get some coffee?”
“If I have another cup I’ll start vibrating.”
“Yard sales?”
“No, it’s hot as balls out.”
Sunghoon pauses, and you nearly think this is it, you’ve finally gotten on his nerves, but he taps his chin and hums, almost like he’s genuinely as invested in this as you are. And then he looks up at you with something malicious in his eyes, and you know you made a mistake coming to him.
“Jake’s place has a pool,” Sunghoon drawls knowingly, “but I’m sure you already knew that.”
Hopping off the counter, you ignore his cackling in favor of flipping him off. “Go fuck yourself, Hoon.”
The rest of your afternoon is spent very excitingly: you rot around in bed for a few extra hours, switching between three apps until refreshing your timeline no longer produces any dopamine. You get up only once Mango saunters into your room and begins incessantly meowing, a clear demand and order for you to feed him. 
Whilst in the kitchen, you decide to have lunch as well and reheat some leftovers for yourself. As the microwave drones on in the background, you fill out a postcard for your aunt to remind her you’re thinking of her and scavenge the drawers for stamps.
Unsurprisingly, you find your phone nearly dead when you come back, so, driven by a sudden burst of Marie Kondo-like motivation, you forgo charging it in favor of attempting to rearrange the entire layout of your room. It only ends up looking even more like a prison cell, except now you’ve precariously stuck up a bunch of wall decor that you unearthed in the clean-up process. A pretty prison cell.
There’s a band poster above your bed of four dudes you don’t recognize, along with fashion and music magazine cutouts from the 90’s. Your aunt had kept a surprising amount of the drawings little 5-year-old you had ceremoniously gifted her, and you try your best to arrange them in a way that complements the other shit you’d stuck up. Obviously, it doesn’t work out quite well.
Sunghoon finds you laying down, though this time it’s on the floor and not your bed. You hear him sigh obnoxiously loudly, followed by his phone’s camera shutter going off, and then a delayed but very pronounced Sunghoon-y laugh. The floorboards creak as he steps closer, pausing right next to your head.
“I’m going out with some friends,” he announces, prodding your shoulder with his foot. “I’m extending the invitation to you ‘cause I don’t want to have to drag your corpse out of here later.”
You sit up way too fast and your neck flares up in pain, but you ignore it in favor of batting your eyes up at him. “Where are we going?”
“Get dressed, Jay’s going to be here in ten,” Sunghoon sing-songs, not paying mind to the customary middle finger you flash him. “Something you can get wet in, preferably.”
There’s a dirty joke missing somewhere, but you forgo it in favor of jumping up and tugging off your ratty gym shorts.
Making yourself look presentable in ten minutes is a feat, but you manage to tidy up well enough that Sunghoon gives you a thumbs up when you join him in the shop upstairs. Despite the fact that you’re wearing shorts and a tank, it’s hot enough that you have to fan yourself aggressively as you wait for Sunghoon to finish packing his tote bag. He himself is donning a very similar attire– another pair of jean shorts and a loose, tucked-in shirt with a palm tree stitched onto the front.
The two of you are locking up the front door when a car honks loudly from behind you, startling you into dropping the keys by your feet. You grumble as you reach down to pick them up, ignoring Sunghoon’s bellowing greeting back.
As you approach the vehicle, the windows on your side roll down in tandem, and two familiar heads poke out like meerkats to gape at you.
“Holy shit, since when are you back in town?” Heeseung is the first to speak, leaning through the window and breaking off into a wince when he slams the top of his head against the window trim.
You have to hide your laughter behind your hand as Heeseung rubs at his scalp and Beomgyu chastises him for being stupid. They get over it pretty quickly though, and turn back to stare at you like meerkats. 
“Hey to you too,” you flush under the sudden attention, hugging your bag to your front. “I came in last week.”
Sunghoon must notice your discomfort, because he tugs you toward the other side of the car, opening the door for you and covering the top rim with his hand lest you suffer the same fate as Heeseung. Thanking him, you duck inside, scooting in next to Beomgyu and giving him what you hope comes off as a warm smile and not an anxious waver. 
Sunghoon climbs in after you, shutting the door and settling back in his seat with a groan. He reaches behind his back to pull out a fast food wrapper, chucking it at the back of the driver’s seat with enough force to send it bouncing back in his own lap. “Jesus fuck, when’s the last time you cleaned up around here, Jay?”
“I would’ve cleaned up had I known we’d have company,” Jay mumbles sheepishly. He drives off from the store, rounding the corner and setting you off on what you faintly remember as being the way toward one of the main beaches.
“It’s really nice to see you again,” Beomgyu interjects brightly, nudging your shoulder gently with his own. Wordlessly, you lean back into his warmth, letting your shoulders sit flush against each other. You think he gets the message.
“Why didn’t you let us know you were coming back?” Heeseung turns around to pout at you from the front. “We would’ve thrown you a welcome party or something. We missed you.”
Hesitating, you shrink under his unblinking gazes. You hadn’t given it much thought, let alone considered that you’d be missed. “Uh, wanted it to be a surprise?”
“We all know you guys would’ve been annoying as fuck about it,” Jay chimes in, “If I were her, I wouldn’t have told you either.”
“The difference is that we wouldn’t miss you,” Sunghoon chucks another wrapper at Jay, snorting when this one ends up hitting him square on the head.
Despite the growing havoc, you find yourself grinning, laughing along when Jay sends a horribly misaimed empty paper cup flying back. You allow yourself to lean back into the seat and relax, just like you used to do before you left. It’s easy to forget how on edge you were feeling earlier when you’re surrounded by people you’d missed.
You’d left many things behind, but it seems like your fondness for your friends never stopped following you.
Jay brings the car to a stop in an empty parking lot bordering one of the several beachfronts in your town. You remember this particular one being further south, where the waves grew taller and where many smaller-scale competitions were held.
Wriggling out of the vehicle after Beomgyu, you make yourself useful by popping the trunk and retrieving the straw mat that you knew Jay kept around for such visits. It’s now tattered and bears several holes in it after being thoroughly used, but you can’t imagine sitting on the burning sand with nothing underneath you.
Heeseung skips over to help you, hauling a case of beer out from the trunk and balancing it precariously over his shoulder. It’s then that you conveniently take notice of what he’s wearing– a band shirt-turned-tanktop with very revealing armholes– and nearly choke on your spit. Pretending to be unbothered, you train your gaze on the tips of your shoes, trying to focus on the way your toes wriggle, but fail miserably. Heeseung looks too good.
“We get it, you started hitting the gym,” you tease, trying not to openly gape at the way his arms fill out his sleeves.
It seems you’ve made it a bit too obvious, because Heeseung practically preens under your attention, grinning cockily and flexing the bicep nearest you. “Yeah? Just wait till I get in the water. There’s more where that came from.”
The comment combined with the rolling humidity makes you feel like you’re about to pass out, so you sneak one last glance at Heeseung’s arms before scurrying away. You choose to set up camp under the shade of a leaning palm tree, somewhat close to the shore but far enough so that the crashing waves don’t dip into the sand nearby.
As soon as the mat’s down, you flop onto it, spreading your arms and legs like a starfish before someone else can take up the space. Despite your efforts, Beomgyu easily crams into the space next to you, humming a melody under his breath while he unpacks the snacks he’d brought. He offers you a bag of gummies, so you don’t bother complaining.
The rest of the boys join you soon after, hissing once the hot sand begins to burn at their soles.
“Fuck this, I’m going in to cool down,” Jay announces, halfway through tugging his shirt off. “Someone text Sunoo and tell him to bring his speaker. And that inflatable Spongebob ball we found the other day.”
As Jay bounces down the remaining distance to the ocean, you tuck your knees under your chin and watch as a flock of seagulls crosses over the melting sun on the horizon. Despite being later in the afternoon, the air still felt heavy and sticky like caramel, practically oozing down your skin in trickles of molten sweat. You try to fan yourself with your hands, but it’s no use when each new gust of air just felt like you were being submerged further and further into a pot of boiling water.
Sunghoon heaves down next to you and Beomgyu, cracking open one of the beer cans from the case. He takes three, four, five long gulps, sighing at the relief from the cold liquid. When he notices you staring, he holds the can out in a silent offering, but you shake your head and point toward his mouth, where some of the beer had trickled out in his haste to gulp it down.
“Aren’t the waves too small for surfing?” Beomgyu asks.
Looking back at him, you find that Beomgyu’s frowning in the direction of the ocean, where a figure is trying to balance on a board under the lip of a crashing wave. Though you yourself never quite took on a surfboard by yourself, you knew that there were certain tricks one could only perform with taller waves, ones which were certainly not found on this beach during this time of year.
It was typically beginners who practiced on such small peaks, but from observing the surfer for a while longer, you could easily deduce that this most certainly wasn’t a beginner. Though they were having trouble because of the lower crest, their maneuvers were carefully executed and dynamic enough to be on a professional level, and even as the wave dipped, they didn’t lose their balance.
“Sunoo!” Your attention’s pulled back by Heeseung’s excited bellow, and you turn to find another familiar face approaching your mat.
“Are you for real?” Sunoo’s question is directed at you, judging by the way his wide eyes meet yours, and you shuffle around so you can hold your arms out for him. He readily launches himself into your embrace, albeit a bit awkwardly because he has to lean down, but it’s warm and inviting nonetheless.
The five of you pack yourselves onto the mat as you wait out the sun to dip further down the horizon. Sunoo asks you about your life back in Melbourne, and you’re more than happy to answer. In turn, you ask him about his job, about that motorbike he’d always wanted, and about the last boy you remember him having a crush on. Judging by his reaction, not everything had gone according to plan.
It’s nice to just hang around like that, too– even as you can’t help but think about someone missing. By the time your stomach’s all twisted up, Heeseung and Sunoo eventually begin to whine about their muscles cramping and get up to go cool off in the water. You watch as they race to the shoreline, snorting when they both end up tripping because of a wave.
“Sounds like you missed us too,” Sunghoon muses, eyes resting carefully on the side of your face.
Your ears warm at the prospect of being watched so carefully, and you duck your chin to avoid letting Sunghoon notice.
“I’m going to take a dip too,” you decide, hauling yourself up and beginning to tug your outerwear off. Though you immediately feel some sort of relief, it’s short-lived and it only makes you feel more eager to jump into the ocean.
The sand is pleasantly warm under the soles of your feet as you jog toward the shoreline, keen yet careful not to snag your leg on a stray branch or rock. Sunoo and Heeseung have trudged further into the ocean, joining Jay who’s now sat atop one of the huge jutting rocks and sunbathing like a cat. They’re close enough that you can make out their scheming expressions as they approach him.
As the water meets your feet, you’re overcome with an inundating sense of peace. Though you’ve already spent a week back at home, you haven’t yet had the chance to come visit the ocean. Growing up so close to it, it had become inevitably tied with your youth, associated with everything you considered home. As much as you tried to forget about it, the riptide pulled you right back under.
Jay’s squawk of surprise as Sunoo and Heeseung haul him into the water startles you into looking back over at them. You bark out a laugh as you continue to watch their shenanigans, Jay resurfacing and promptly dragging both of the perpetrators under with him. They all yell in unison, cut off once they plummet under, followed by a stream of bubbles as they wrestle with each other.
Any thought of joining them is thrown out the window when you see one of their legs stick out from the water, only to flail around uselessly and be sucked right back under.
You dip further in until the water is lapping at your chest. It’s pleasantly cool against your sun-streaked skin, and as you run your palms through the undulating water, your body readily immerses itself until you’re bobbing pleasantly with each new wave. The noise of the ocean stuffs your ears like cotton, and you can’t help but think you never want to be so far from it again.
An unexpectedly forceful wave has you yelping and rushing to keep your head above the water. When you bring your palms back up, you notice with a sinking feeling that a few of your rings are missing, ones you were sure you came into the ocean with. Cursing yourself for your carelessness, you look around aimlessly, squinting against the sun and watching for any signs of them in the water.
A bright glare reflecting from a stroke’s distance away from you has you venturing deeper, toward a section of the water where you’re certain you see something floating.
You lunge forward, expecting to catch onto the next level of rocks with your feet, but instead, you’re met with cold gaps of water and nothingness. A surge of panic seizes you by the throat, and you have half a second to process that you’re falling before your head’s submerged and you’re entirely suspended in the ocean.
There’s something tugging at your body, relentless and forceful and even as you squint blearily through the water, you don’t see anything there.
You feel yourself go cold all over, and the shock of the situation renders you immobile for a split second. Your legs thrash about trying to locate the nearest surface to find purchase on, but you’re pulled back by another crescendoing wave, and you lose all semblance of direction before you can head for the surface. As the wave flips you, you’re sent hurdling even deeper, where the water grows colder and the noise from above is muffled beyond comprehension.
You feel your chest grow tighter and tighter by the second, a newfound fuzziness suffusing your head. Your lungs burn with the need to breathe in, but you can’t tell which way is up and down and you think you’re going to run out of breath and–
There’s a tight grip at your forearm, pulling you toward the surface with a searing strength. Your legs kick out from under you as you try your hardest to propel yourself along, until another hand joins the other to clasp onto your other arm. You break the surface of the ocean with a ragged gasp, groaning when you feel your torso hit something solid.
You realize you’ve been hauled onto a surfboard as it buoyantly sways atop an incoming wave. Inhaling deeply, you grip the sides of the board until your knuckles turn white, fearful of slipping back into the never-ending whirlwind of water. The roaring of the ocean fills your ears like static until you can’t discern it over the sound of your own coughing.
“You’re okay, you’re okay,” there’s a familiar voice above you, but you’re too preoccupied with hacking up water and trying to breathe to look up.
Something brushes your forehead, and you feel your hair being pushed out of your face, allowing the setting sunlight to burn against your eyelids. You blink the world back into view, wincing when some of the salty water dips right back into your eyes. You find an achingly familiar face staring back at you amidst the noise in your ears, and for a split second, you think it’s your oxygen-deprived brain conjuring up hallucinations.
Jake blinks at you timidly when your gaze focuses on him. He looks alarmed, as if the sight of him is enough to send you rearing back into the water. But even in the hazy aftershock of your incident, you’re unable to feel anything but gratitude.
Slumping against the board, you close your eyes and focus on taking deep breaths. The water around you sloshes as Jake maneuvers the two of you toward shore, taking extra precautions not to let any waves spill out against you. You hear shouting from the shore end, where you presume the rest of your friends have caught on to what’s happening.
As the board reaches the shallow end, you feel the same hands envelop your sides, this time bringing you into a secure hold against Jake’s firm skin. Your heart’s pounding in your ears and you’re too preoccupied with taking shallow breaths to focus on how warm Jake feels against you.
The next few minutes feel like a blur in the most literal sense. Your vision is still bleary and you have a hard time making out your friends faces as they cluster in around Jake and try to help him lay you down. There’s so much noise that you can’t discern any words in particular, everything jumbled together into a sequence of distant-sounding, unrecognizable utterances.
You groan as your back hits something soft and you become acutely aware of all the unwavering stares on you. You try to sit up but fail, clearing your throat and taking a few deep, staggering breaths.
“Fuck, I feel like shit,” you rasp. It makes a relieved bout of laughter ring out around you, and you smile despite the discomfort in your chest.
“We’ll give you some space,” Sunghoon says gently, patting your calf. The touch lingers as he draws away, and you follow his retreating figure with your unfocused gaze.
One by one, you watch as your friends pull back, reconvening further away so as not to overwhelm you with their conversations and bearings. But you feel a lingering presence remain by your head, and the curious urge in you beats out the embarrassment you think you should feel. Looking up, you find Jake already staring back.
“Is it hard for you to breathe? Do you feel like there’s still pressure in your lungs?” Jake’s eyes seek yours out anxiously, and you realize with a start that he’s genuinely worried.
“I’m okay,” you promise, “I think I just need to rest. I’m more in shock than anything else.”
Nodding, Jake exhales sharply, and you notice his shoulders deflate. He settles down on the mat, leaving a comfortable gap between the two of you. You watch as the material beneath him dampens from his swim trunks, eyes trailing along the exposed skin of his legs, now covered in smatterings of sand. You only look away when you spot a familiar mole on his upper thigh.
“I’m sorry,” you say quietly.
You’re met with silence, heavy and unnerving. It’s the kind that makes you think you’ve said something wrong, something that needs to be taken back, forgotten. You nearly think Jake’s missed it until you hear quiet shuffling, then–
“S’okay, you just scared me a bit back there, that’s all,” he mumbles. You feel the warm weight of his gaze settling on your face again, but you think any last breath you have in you will be knocked out if you try to look back up at him. Looking at Jake has always been a bit like looking into the sun. “I still care about you a lot, despite what you might think. I was really worried.”
The sincerity in his words makes your chest churn painfully. Breathing in deeply, you reach out blindly with your hand along the mat, feeling the damp straw beneath your fingertips as you search for the familiar callouses you held onto earlier.
“I know,” you whisper, for a lack of better words. There’s something unsaid left hanging in the air, and you hope Jake can catch onto it before it disappears.
Jake’s fingers meet yours, and you hold your breath as they slip between the crevices of your own. You don’t dare to open your eyes, instead focusing on steadying your racing heart, on Jake and his gentle touch along your knuckles. His hold is grounding, but your mind still flutters at the prospects of what if, what if, what if.
The momentum between you two shifts after that, but the nagging voice at the back of your mind stays.
Jake begins joining your group around town more and more often, usually for smaller increments of time between his practice sessions and work shifts. You come to learn that he now works as a trainer at the same academy he started training at, and that he coaches the under-12 group. He’s still busy as ever, but your friends make it a point that he’s always invited no matter when he’s able to join.
Jake takes these invites seriously; he drops by your hangouts nearly every time you’re there, a feat that isn’t hard for you to miss. He keeps a respectful distance but it doesn’t feel like he’s taken to ignoring you and ruling you out of his life completely. If anything, it’s the latter. You know the distance is more for your own sake than anything, and with each time you see him, it becomes increasingly harder for you to stay away.
Jake also begins visiting the shop more and more often, though never to buy anything substantial. He’ll usually do a quick round of the aisles before coming to hang out at the counter, where he’ll make (initially shy) conversation with you before purchasing a Clif Bar and leaving.
Admittedly, you enjoy the company more than you should, even if Jake’s presence is technically a hindrance to your professional work environment.
“Don’t you have a competition to be getting ready for?”
Jake’s eyebrows furrow, and he stops reading the ingredients label of the bar he’s holding to look up at you like you’re crazy. “I am. This is part of my new pre-practice ritual.”
“What, buying Clif Bars and showing me funny Tiktoks?” Your question’s meant to be amusing, but Jake nods at you, dead serious.
“I think I like the Crunchy Peanut Butter flavor the most,” he hums, handing over the bar so you can scan it. “Also, if I don’t have your socials, how am I supposed to show you all the red panda Tiktoks I’ve been seeing?”
The iPad dings softly as you go through the motions of finalizing his purchase. You feel Jake’s unfaltering gaze follow your hands, and you try not to let how flustered you feel show. “Is this you trying to be slick while asking for my number?”
“Maybe,” he grins. “Only if it’s okay, though.”
Jake slides a bill toward you, taking the bar and pocketing it in his shorts. No matter how confident he sounds, you’re able to tell he’s nervous by the way he wrings his hands behind his back.
Wordlessly, you pass your phone across the counter, trying not to look too pleased as Jake practically whoops and picks it up to type in his digits. When you get it back, you see that he’s written himself in as Jakey, followed by an emoji combination that you can’t make sense of. Something warm stirs in your gut.
It’s your fourteenth birthday when you finally muster up the courage to let Jake teach you how to surf.
The word teach being used very loosely, but rather, just letting Jake mess around with you on his board. At that point, he had been in the academy for just over three years, enough to give both of you some kind of reassurance that he knew what he was doing. Jake had offered you lessons countless of times before then, eager to get you on the same board that had brought him so much joy, but you’d never had the guts to agree.
“This feels like attempted murder,” you whine from where you’re perched on his board, shrieking when a wave jostles you the tiniest bit.
Jake laughs at you, though not unkindly, and he expertly grabs onto your forearms and maneuvers you into a more secure position. He’s surprisingly gentle yet firm, and when he wades a bit deeper into the water, you find that you’re not as nervous as you thought you’d be. He instructs you on what to do when the next wave comes, promising you that he’ll be next to you in case anything happens.
He helps you ride out the first wave, making a show of clapping for you even though you did none of the work. The next few come and go very similarly, until you begin to get a hang of the general motions needed to keep you above the water. The reassurance of Jake’s hands on your skin is enough to have you soaring with your head in the clouds.
When a higher wave approaches, you tell Jake you’re confident in taking on it yourself. His eyebrows arch when he looks at you, but he steps away to let you handle it on your own. Your stomach swells in tandem with the wave and you scream bloody murder once you feel the board move, but you’re somehow able to stay above the water without any of his help.
“I did it! Did you see that? Jake, holy shit!” Your peals of joy are muffled suddenly when a wave slams into your side and your open mouth fills with briny water. Sputtering, you turn to see Jake fail miserably at hiding his amusement, doubling over from his laughter.
“Yah, it’s not funny! I could’ve died!” You scold him, but it only makes him laugh harder.
“It’s a little funny, you have to admit,” he says, and you really can’t disagree with him. “Besides, you’re doing really well. I’m happy you finally let me, even if it’s taken me months of convincing.”
“There’s a reason I don’t trust you,” you huff, but the words carry no animosity and you couldn’t mean them less. You trust Jake with your every fiber.
“I think this is your sign to join me in the academy,” Jake declares.
Frowning, you move to dismount the board and sink into the water next to him. “I can’t see myself enjoying it as much as you do, Jake.”
Jake hums, frowning. You can’t take looking at him upset, so you decide the best option is to climb up on his back and smother him in a tight hug. He complains when your arms come to encircle his shoulders and you cling onto him like gum, but his protests are weak and only motivate you to hug him harder.
“Can I be honest?” The vulnerable edge to Jake’s voice has you stiffening. “I’m scared we won’t be as close soon. I’ve got the academy and school, and I know you’ve got all those tutoring sessions after school too. What if we can’t hang out anymore? What if you start to think you’re too cool for me?”
Snorting, you can’t help but squeeze his shoulders tightly and lean even more of your weight on him. Jake doesn’t seem to mind one bit, hands warm where they’re holding your knees.
“If I thought I was too cool for you I wouldn’t be spending my birthday alone with you.”
“Not true, we had lunch with the rest of your friends earlier,” he mumbles, which earns him a chastising flick against his temple. “Ow, what! It’s facts!”
“Can you just accept the fact that I care about you?” You rest your chin atop his damp hair. “Maybe I even love you. Have you thought about that, Jake?”
When Jake doesn’t respond, you’re left to listen to the crashing of waves around you. You sit with the words in your head, and as anxious as you feel having said them out loud, you know you mean them. Jake’s been an inseparable part of your life for as long as your brain can conceptualize being alive, it’s inevitable that you’d grow to care and love him.
You didn’t know it then, but it was also inevitable the love that you felt would blossom into something much, much harder to ignore.
“I love you too,” Jake echoes, and it’s so quiet you nearly miss it.
Clambering off his back, you fall into the water with a splash.
“My last birthday wish is that you get me to that buoy over there.” Pointing in the distance, Jake follows your finger and squints at the bobbing yellow buoy. You’ve never been that far in, but you feel oddly brave in the wake of the setting sun.
“This is, like, your 5th birthday wish already,” he says without much conviction, already moving to pull the board in closer to you.
“I know,” you grin. “But you love me, so I doubt you care all that much.”
The day of the state qualifiers falls on the first Saturday of January, a warm and humid day with a sky as blue as the ocean. You and Sunghoon close up the shop at noon to join your friends on the beach, where they’ve occupied the closest spectator area to the shore and are frantically applying sunscreen before the shade pulls back from their zone.
As expected, they’re all boasting varying shades of blue– Jake’s (mostly) self-proclaimed lucky color. The whole shtick started at one of his first competitions at the academy, where you and Sunghoon had happened to both be wearing blue when Jake won his first ever podium title. Jake had called you his lucky charms, fully knowing it was silly, yet neither of you ever dared to show up without the color afterwards.
You’re also donning your own bit of blue, a discreetly tucked handkerchief in one of your pockets, with which you mindlessly fiddle as you approach your friends. You’d thought it to be subtle enough, easy to blame on a mindless coincidence, but one raised brow from Sunghoon had confirmed otherwise.
Sunoo’s speaker borders on obnoxiously loud as it blasts Megan Thee Stallion’s Thot Shit, garnering concerned looks from the company of grandmothers that have taken up seats next to you. They seem to reconsider their choice of seating, but the quickly filling lot on the sand leaves them with few options to move. You and Sunghoon have to squeeze in next to Heeseung on the end to fit on the blanket, and end up sitting shoulder to shoulder and knee to knee.
You’re also close to the judging panel, a small shaded hut where a few people in white polos are shuffling around with papers, readying as the tournament draws to a start. Heeseung passes the bottle of sunscreen to you and you thank him with a smile, squeezing out a handful to begin lathering onto your exposed arms and legs. The sun overhead begins muscling through the canopy soon after and you’re forced to savor the last few moments of shady reprieve.
The first competitor is introduced over the speaker, and an immediate ripple of cheering rings through the audience. You clap good-naturedly but can’t deny your attention begins to stray the longer it takes for Jake to be called. He’s one of the last names, and as soon as the two familiar syllables of his name are announced, you perk up excitedly.
Jake and his signature baby blue board appear seconds later, followed by a tumult of deafening cheers from your section. It’s partly due to Sunoo’s incredible lung capacity, but it’s also no secret that your town has always shown up to support Jake in competitions. He’s been a favorite ever since he began winning the junior championships in high school, climbing his way up to the highest ranks along the Sunshine Coast and earning himself the title of your town’s pride.
The rest of the competitors are familiar to you in their own ways. You recall seeing a few of them at past events, where they’d gone against Jake and failed to strip him of his title, and the rest being fellow members of Jake’s surfing academy.
The panel of judges officiates the beginning of the tournament, and with a resounding whistle, the first surfer drops into the water and meets his first wave.
Though you’d been to your fair share of surfing competitions, you’d forgotten the infectious thrill that usually accompanied attending them. The thrum of excitement in the air has you leaning forward throughout the entirety of the first, second, and third heats, watching the surfers tackle waves with an effortlessness that leaves you astonished.
Jake’s able to pass through all of the heats with remarkably high scores, a feat that’s never failed to impress you. The waves he catches within the competition zone are simple enough to leave no room for mistakes, and yet complicated enough that the other competitors struggle in their maneuvers to impress the judges. He performs his usual routine, the one you’d watched him rehearse for years on end during practice sessions, and ends it off with a foam climb that sends a ripple of applause throughout the audience.
As his last twenty-minute set draws to an end, Jake paddles back toward the shoreline while the competitor prepares to jump in after him. He waves over at your section, grinning boyishly when Heeseung wolf-whistles and Sunoo makes a suggestive hand sign at him. Your eyes meet for the briefest moment right before Jake has to exit the water, but it’s all you’re able to think about while the rest of the competition drags on.
As expected, Jake takes a place among the top 3 competitors. He’s just a few points from first place, but it’s enough to qualify him for the next, higher level competition that’ll undoubtedly be more important to him.
As the customary ending ceremony concludes, your group waits for him off to the side, away from the huddle of audience members queuing to get a photo. They’re currently swarming the third place champ, who looks like he’d rather be anywhere else but there.
Jake appears not long after. He’s still shirtless, which is really awful but also really great for you, and he’s pushed his damp hair away from his face. You think you’re going to die when he gets close enough for you to make out that the necklace he’s wearing is a wooden star charm you gifted him when he first started surfing. You know he’s most likely forgotten who gave it to him in the first place, but the chance that he might possibly remember has you feeling feverish.
Sunoo jumps on Jake’s back as soon as he joins you all under the shade. Jake oofs, but readily supports Sunoo with his arms, who cheers cutely and grips onto him like a koala. You tell yourself that you really couldn’t care less if Jake’s biceps flex from the action.
“There’s our guy,” Jay hollers, ruffling Jake’s hair. He circles Jake like a vulture and tries to jump on Sunoo’s back, which sends all three of them screeching and barreling down into the sand. You can’t find it in you to feel embarrassed even as people look over, laughing heartily at the way they wriggle around and curse.
“I’m going to blacklist you from all of my competitions,” Jake threatens once he’s finally off the ground, scowling as he shakes the sand out of his hair.
“You did really good,” you blurt out. “That last Pipeline came out of nowhere, but you handled it well. Even the judges thought so.”
Jake knows this. He knows his routine better than you do, knows what happened out in the ocean better than you do. And yet he still smiles sweetly, thanks you, and tells you he’s really glad you came. You see the way his eyes flicker towards the bandana sticking out of your pocket, and try not to preen under his gaze when he all but flushes.
“You should all come to mine to celebrate, my mom’s going to be making barbecue later,” he offers. Much to your dismay, he tugs a shirt on and hauls the strap of his bag onto his shoulder.
“Auntie Sim we fucking love you,” Sunoo mumbles.
It’s a unanimous decision, and you couldn’t be happier cramped into the back of Jake’s car.
Aside from your friends, the only thing you’ll admit to missing from your hometown would be Auntie Lee’s Double Cheeseburger and Milkshake Combo™. It was what you ate to celebrate your high school graduation, what you ate with Jake to console him after one of his many breakups, and the last thing you ate before you thought you’d be leaving for good.
But despite Melbourne’s more than abundant choices of fast food, all of the restaurants you’d tried out had only left you missing Auntie Lee more. You blamed some of it on nostalgia, but really, when it came down to your very professional opinion, she just made a really good burger and milkshake.
So, when Heeseung proposes you all hang out again soon, you’re quick to suggest her diner as the meeting spot.
Thankfully, not much has changed there either. Auntie Lee’s hair is now a burgundy red, a shade you think suits her better than her past ginger tint, and she greets you at the register with the same crooked smile you’ve come to associate with her good food. Her apron still has an array of colorful pins she’d collected over the years and a stubborn grease stain right below the neckline that makes you feel oddly reminiscent.
The six of you squeeze into one of the booths by the window, the same one you used to crowd into as high schoolers after late-night study sessions. The formation in which you choose to sit in is strikingly similar as well, and when you run your fingertips along the underside of the table on your side, you’re able to quickly locate a carving that you’d done haphazardly in your senior year.
“Holy shit, our initials are still here,” you say, and Sunghoon reaches under the table to check as well.
As Auntie Lee brings your orders in record time, you sit back against the booth and survey the rest of the table. If you dig far back enough in your camera roll, you’re certain you have an exact shot of a moment just like this captured.
“Inflation somehow never hit this place.” Jay’s looking at the food like a predator, and you try not to giggle. You hear Sunghoon mumble a prompt amen from next to you and you look down at your own food with an increasingly salivating mouth.
“Cheers to us and to the economy,” Heeseung raises his milkshake, and the rest of the table is quick to follow suit. As you laugh and clink your glasses together, you catch Jake’s eyes peering at you from across the booth, but he’s quick to look away when you notice.
As you dig into your burger, you try not to think about the lingering feeling of his eyes on you. Jake’s always had a sort of maddening effect on you– once the thought of him circulated in your mind, getting rid of him was like tugging gum off of hot asphalt.
“My shift earlier was ass but this is enough to fix me,” Heeseung mumbles through his mouthful of burger, wiping at his sauce-stained mouth with a napkin.
“Do you still work at that cafe by the bike rental place?” You ask.
Heeseung furrows his brows and shakes his head adamantly, swallowing his bite before responding. “I left a while ago. I work at that one hotel by the beach now. The one with the funny misspelled sign outside.”
Humming in acknowledgement, you swallow the bite in your mouth and frown. “Huh.”
“I feel like I don’t know anything about you anymore. And I feel like you don’t know anything about us anymore, either,” Jay admits with a pout. His words make your stomach turn uneasily, and you put down your burger with guilty fingers.
“Yeah,” Sunoo hums in agreement, “what’s been going on with you? You told us you were leaving to study in Melbourne, but that’s pretty much all I know. You never post on Instagram either.”
It’s true– when you were first planning on leaving, you had no intention of forgetting everything behind. You didn’t have time for goodbyes, and as shitty as it was, the thought of keeping in close touch with your friends scared you. You worried that what had happened between you and Jake would alter all of your friendships forever, and that they no longer saw you in the same way.
Clearing your throat, you try not to let your voice waver under the weight of their attention. “I do study in Melbourne, I pretty much live there full-time now. Have an apartment and everything,” you pause when Sunoo cheers brightly, and you flush at his enthusiasm before continuing. “That’s pretty much it, though. I was going to work in the city this summer, but I’m honestly kind of glad Sunghoon called. Didn’t realize how much I missed this place.”
Everyone awes, and from beside you, Sunghoon squeezes your shoulder gently.
“Do you live with anyone?” Sunoo asks slyly, popping another fry into his mouth. He props his chin up on his hand, feigning indifference, but you know him well enough to tell when he’s trying to be foxy. “Roommates? Friends? …A special someone?”
Waving him off, you laugh at how his lips quirk up inquisitively. “No, it’s a small space so I’m glad it’s just me. And if you’re trying to ask if I’ve got a boyfriend or girlfriend, you’re not being slick at all.”
The rest of the table laughs with you, but you don’t miss Sunoo’s whine of protest.
Jay crosses his arms, cocking his head. His stare makes you put down your fry. “So? Do you?”
“I expected this from Sunoo but not from you, Jay,” you huff. “Fuck, you’re all nosy as shit, you know that?”
When everyone continues to stare back expectantly, you pout and look down in defeat, “But yes, for the record, I’m single.”
“Jake’s studying in Brisbane now,” Heeseung says out of nowhere, and you look up to see the boy in question choke on his milkshake out of surprise. “He commutes, like, every day. As much as it’s crazy, I respect the grind. He’s always been smart as shit.”
The rest of the table hums in agreement, but you feel Sunghoon stiffen up next to you.
Jake clears his throat and rubs his neck sheepishly, clearly a bit startled by the sudden attention. Not for the first time that afternoon, he looks up at you tentatively, almost like making eye contact with you will sting him. “Um, yeah. I’m studying engineering. Architectural engineering, if we’re being technical. I applied and got in last year.”
“That’s really nice,” you say earnestly. Your throat feels all dry but you’re eager to hear more, almost desperate to grasp at everything you’ve missed in his life since you’d left. “Sounds hard, won’t lie, but you’re smart like that. I’m happy for you.”
Nodding, Jake’s lips twitch, almost like he’s trying to suppress his grin. The edges of his eyes crinkle as he tips his head forward in a show of gratitude. “Thank you.”
You’re not quite sure if you should continue the conversation or leave it where it is, so you reach for your milkshake, awkwardly tucking the straw between your lips to give yourself something to do. As you sip up the last of the liquid, your slurping screeches around the table and you wince.
“Fuck, it’s worse than I thought,” Heeseung groans loudly. His fork clatters in his plate where he drops it, the clang resounding around the empty diner dramatically.
“You two need to fix this, like, now,” Jay agrees, rubbing his temples. “The sexual tension is throwing me off. Do you get how bad that is?”
Frowning, you let go of your straw to stare at them in dismay, and, quite frankly, embarrassment. You’re sure your ears and neck are telling shades of red, based on how warm you feel all over, and you’re sure everyone can see. You knew you couldn’t avoid this for much longer, but the bandaid being ripped off didn’t hurt any less.
“You’re making her uncomfortable,” Jake speaks up. He’s looking at you concerned, but you can’t bear to meet his eyes for longer than a second.
“It’s okay, I know they’re joking,” you say meekly, frustrated with how upset you sound. You’re not, no matter how much you wish you were anywhere but here.
The blanket of silence that swathes the whole table weighs on you like stones. You stare at your empty cup stubbornly, refusing to look up at the pairs of eyes that are watching you intently, some with pity, some with guilt. You feel like a caged animal, backed into a corner and left with nowhere to run.
“I’m going to get some fresh air,” you announce. Still looking down, you get up abruptly and wade out from the booth, murmuring apologies under your breath as you knock into Sunghoon’s feet.
The night air is stuffy and briny as you breathe in mouthfuls of it. The headlights of a passing car blind you momentarily as you lean against the wooden railing of the restaurant’s porch, making you blink disorientedly. A group of teenagers noisily clamber in past you, and you ignore the looks that get thrown your way.
Jake steps outside soon after. Some part of you knew he would come after you, and it preens selfishly when he spots you and all but jogs to you.
“Hey,” he says awkwardly. There’s some scuffling against the porch floor before he comes to join you against the railing. A beat of stillness passes, then– “I’m really sorry.”
You snort. “Not your fault. Nothing to be sorry about.”
Jake regards you silently, the intensity of his gaze burning into your slumped shoulders. He always looks at you like he can see right through you, right through all of your skin and flesh and ugly secrets. It's unnerving thinking about just how much he knows.
“No, I–”
“Jake,” you cut him off, voice falling just short of desperate. Your knuckles begin to turn white where your hands curl against the porch. “I don’t want you to apologize. What happened between us isn’t something to be sorry about. It happened, and that’s that. Just wish you and everyone else wouldn’t be so stubborn about bringing it up all the time.”
The silence that follows rings in your ears and settles uncomfortably in your gut. You hesitate before speaking again, wanting to gauge Jake’s reaction, but you’re afraid he’ll leave if you don’t hurry.
“I just want to start over. Clean slate,” you mumble.
Jake remains quiet for what feels like an eternity. Your stomach twists anxiously, tossing and turning when his ruminating gaze shifts up from your shoulders and onto your face
“Is that what you want?” Jake’s voice is feeble and it washes over you like a breeze.
Breathing in sharply, you nod.
“Okay,” he says simply.
Then, in an act so unexpected it throws you off guard for a good few seconds, he thrusts a hand between both of your bodies, grinning impishly. “I’m Jake. Nice to meet ya. You come here often?”
The laugh that bursts from you is so raw and genuine and it makes your chest flutter. You take his hand and mutter your name between giggles, ignoring how the warmth encasing your palm is achingly familiar. "Fuck, you’re actually unbelievable. And no, first time in town actually.”
“Really,” Jake plays along easily, smirking when he leans against the railing next to you. “You wouldn’t reckon you need someone to show you around, would you?”
The implications of the offer are clear as day, and you visibly hesitate in your response. Jake’s features soften the slightest bit, like he’s afraid he’s crossed a boundary, and you hate the way your heart swells at this.
“I wouldn’t mind,” you say cheekily.
You and Jake have always had somewhat of a normal relationship.
You first met him in primary school, when he was still shorter than you and had a gap in his teeth when he smiled. Having recently moved into town, he was placed in the same homeroom as you, and, by the will something much greater than the both of you, into the empty chair next to you.
It was hard to ignore him for more reasons than the fact that he was sitting just two feet away from you. Jake was full of personality, as you’d come to learn, and as charismatic as a boy could be at the tender age of 7. He was funny, knew a bit too much about whales and turtles, and was nice enough to share his lunch with you on the days you’d forgotten yours.
It was inevitable that he’d become your friend– you’d walk home together, play at the park together, and dig around in the dirt for worms occasionally– and you never thought it would get any more complicated than that. Until you entered secondary school.
Jake followed you into one of the three secondary schools in your town, and it’s where the two of you would come to meet Sunghoon. Although you two were no longer in the same homeroom, you still made efforts to spend the majority of your free time together, now joined by a third. Sunghoon seamlessly became interwoven into your life just like Jake had, and you couldn’t think about a future without either of them.
At the end of your first year in secondary school, Jake started surfing lessons and got his first girlfriend at the academy.
It was weird for you and Sunghoon, now one person less as you gathered at your usual spots at the park, your backyard, and the parking lot behind Auntie Lee’s diner. Sunghoon reasoned that nothing much had changed, but you both knew that wasn’t true. There was a Jake-shaped void that was impossible to ignore, much less fill, as he became more and more enthralled with the sport and his new girlfriend.
You’d never really met Haeun properly, despite how entangled you both were in Jake’s life. You had no reason to believe she wasn’t nice– Jake seemed more than happy every time he talked about her and boasted the widest grin you’d seen on him every time they texted. She was among the top in her age group at the surfing academy, had pretty hair, and even followed you back on Instagram. You really had no reason to believe anything bad.
And yet, you couldn’t help it. There was some deep, ugly feeling within you that you couldn’t get rid of for as long as she was involved with him. Looking back, it didn’t bother you as much as it probably should’ve. When you’d divulged your feelings to Sunghoon, he’d also brushed it off as innate jealousy. Your best friend was spending more time away from you, who wouldn’t be a little bit frustrated?
But from there, everything went downhill. Jake and Haeun broke up by the time summer ended, much to your relief, but it was far from the last girl that Jake got involved with. As the three of you worked your way up toward graduating, Jake grew further into his features and learned to embrace his hobbies with more and more groups of people. It was inevitable that Jake would earn himself a place among your school’s most well-known, and consequently, draw even more attention to himself, both from guys and girls.
Despite all of that, he continued to be someone you and Sunghoon could lean on. He had rigorous practice sessions that took up most of his week but made an effort to visit both of you after school to study and get food. Any time you felt like he was drifting away, he’d reel himself back in and attach himself to your side like gum. Which only made the suffocating feeling in you grow stronger.
It wasn’t until year 12 prom that you realized what was wrong with you.
While Jake had a date from another class, you and Sunghoon decided to show up to the event together, if only to take advantage of the free food and drinks your school was offering. The whole night, you couldn’t take your eyes off of Jake from across the dance hall, anxiously watching the way he’d spin his date, the way he’d smile, laugh, and look at her like she’d personally hung the stars up in the sky.
As selfish as it was, you imagined yourself in her spot. And in retrospect, it really couldn’t have been more obvious.
“Are you not having fun?” Sunghoon had asked, hands slipping from where they were holding you by the waist.
When you’d turned back to look at him, the crestfallen expression on his face made you flinch. He looked like a kicked puppy, and it stung more to know you’d been the one kicking this whole time. “I’m sorry, I got distracted.”
“Really?” He’d scoffed, this time fully letting go of you. There was a vulnerable look in his eye as he stepped back, face dipping into the shadows of the dancing lights. “What’s the point of agreeing to go with me if you’re just going to stare at him like that the whole time?”
Everyone had gotten a bit weird around this time, but it wasn’t hard for you to tell what was going on. Sunghoon had never been really good at hiding his own feelings; you knew the cafe study dates were beginning to turn into more than just study dates for him. You’d noticed the lingering touches, the meaningful glances, the fond way he’d call your name. Somewhere along the way, Sunghoon had gotten caught up in you.
In hindsight, it was selfish of you to forgo addressing it. It was selfish to ignore it, stash it away at the back of your mind and hope he’d one day find his way out. But the paralyzing fear kept you so eagerly and cruelly reciprocative, so willing to play along. You already felt like you’d lost Jake, you couldn’t afford to lose Sunghoon too.
“Hoonie, I’m sorry, you know I–”
“I know,” he’d said, lips twisting into a pained smile. His eyes drifted over somewhere behind you, where you knew Jake was dancing with his date, and he shook his head. “And yet some stupid part of me hoped you’d finally get over him.”
In all your infinite luck, it seems like you never fully could.
Slowly and heedlessly, Jake intertwines himself in the fibers of your life once again.
He’s the first face you see in the mornings at the shop. His laugh reverberates in your ears long after you two part ways for the day, his brief, fleeting touches linger along your skin like those of a receding wave’s. His contact name is the last thing you see at night, and he’s all you think about until you slip away to unconsciousness.
You’re so full of him you’re drowning– he’s everywhere around you and you think there’s really no escaping him this time.
“When does your shift end?” Jake pushes yet another Clif Bar across the register’s counter toward you.
The clock behind you chimes softly in response. You squint up at the rusted arrows and turn to Jake inquisitively. “In 10 minutes. Why?”
“Cool,” Jake rips open the wrapper and takes a bite from the bar. Chewing, he grins at you slyly. “You wanna come by mine after?” The proposition sounds more like a question than anything, but Jake knows you’ll say yes.
Jake’s car is a shacky little thing his family gifted him for this 18th. It’s the same as you remember it, with a mess of stickers haphazardly stuck along the dashboard and a row of stuffed animals along the back window that his cousins had left behind. The passenger seat still squeaks when you try to adjust it, and you both laugh when you end up sitting down and the cushion whines from under you.
Jake drives you through a route you know too well. He rolls the windows down (as far as the car allows them) and points at renovated buildings and new lots alike, narrating everything you’d missed while away. You lean against the door and let the breeze wash over your face, fiddling with the bag in your lap.
You’re there but you’re also not– Jake’s voice serves as an anchor while your mind wanders off just far enough not to worry him. These are all places you’ve been with him, and with each passing place, you have to blink away vivid memories that flash before your eyes in technicolor film.
You and Jake celebrating your middle school graduation at the rundown arcade that’s now been modernized. You and Jake troubling over what to gift Sunghoon at the comic book store that’s now shut down forever. You and Jake chasing his dog at the park that now finally has a special fenced off section just for dogs. You and Jake–
“This is the park where you lost one of your baby teeth from falling off a swing. You started crying and I had to take you home on my bike.”
“You remember that?” You blink at him incredulously, face growing hot.
“Of course I do,” Jake says matter-of-factly. “It’s hard to forget when the tooth’s still in my room.”
“What?!” Your bag slips off your lap when you sit up straight, bewildered and embarrassed. “No way, your mom wrapped it up and I took it home with me.”
Jake brings the car to a steady stop by the curb in front of his house. He reaches over across you to help you roll your window back up, and you try not to squirm under his amused gaze. “I’ll just show you then.”
Layla greets both of you at the threshold of the door, yelping once she lays eyes on you. You have a solid second to brace yourself before she leaps forward, propping both of her front paws against your thighs and wagging her tail so fast you worry she’ll start floating. Nearly losing your balance, you squeak in surprise, but are quick to reach out and pet her. 
You coo at her like she’s your own baby and in a way, she certainly is.
She’s soft and warm, cuddly as she headbutts your palms and licks at your fingers. “I missed you so much, cutie.”
“She missed you too,” Jake says, and you look up right as the camera shutter on his phone goes off. Squawking, you cover your face, albeit too late, because Jake giggles at his screen and you hear him mumble a quiet cute.
Jake’s room looks smaller than you remember it being. You think it’s because the small twin he used to have has been replaced by a modest queen, but you’re also no longer fresh out of high school and naive. There are sun-bleached spots in places where his old posters are, the walls now sparsely lined with polaroids and printed film photos.
Your feet subconsciously bring you closer to the walls. You squint at each of the photos, the people in some of them unrecognizable to you. There’s one from the day of your graduation, but it’s just Jake with his mom, along with a bouquet large enough to take up a third of the frame. There are a few of Layla in a wide range of settings, including one that you’re certain was taken while you were at the park together. There’s even one of the sunrise at the beach on a morning with calm waters and no people in sight.
Most notably, there are none of you up there. You reason that it wouldn’t make any sense for there to be in the first place, given everything that had happened, but some pathetic part of you wishes that Jake still held onto you the same way you did to him.
“Here,” Jake says, snapping your attention back to him. He’s unearthed a plain blue box from the depths of his closet, and he’s pushing it towards you with a lopsided smile.
You abandon the photographs and plop yourself down on the carpet. Peeling back the lid of the box, you peek inside and try to ignore the way your breath quickens when Jake situates himself right next to you. Your knees brush together as your fingers slowly sift through the contents, your mind barely registering what you’re looking at in the box.
A bunch of movie tickets from screenings you’d seen years ago. A birthday card you’d painted for him in middle school. An old Pikachu figurine you’d won for him at the fair. A postcard you’d mailed him from a school trip to Sydney. A magazine cutout from when you’d sat down to do vision boards together. A polaroid of you and Jake at the beach, posing with a hyperactive Layla who’d come out blurry on the film. A tiny plastic box with your baby tooth in it.
Your mind is racing so fast you feel the world around you halt still. Your shaky fingers pick up the box, peeling back the napkin that it’s wrapped up in.
“You– Why’d you keep all of this?”
Jake blinks at you like it’s a ridiculous question. “What, am I supposed to get rid of everything that reminds me of you? This box doesn’t have even a fraction of all that, anyway.”
It’s hard for you to wrap your mind around the thought, but Jake’s been holding onto you far longer than you could’ve hoped for.
“Can I tell you something?” Jake asks.
“You already did,” you joke, crumpling up the napkin under your hands and chucking it at him.
Jake catches it effortlessly and grins at you, but it doesn’t quite reach his eyes. “I know you said you wanted to forget everything from before, but I feel as if I owe you an explanation. If not you, then for my own sake. It keeps me up sometimes, ya know?”
Your breath begins to thin out, but you nod anyway. You’ve known this conversation was inevitable, no matter how much you pushed it off. You couldn’t go back to Melbourne without letting Jake rip off the same bandaid for which he was responsible.
Jake’s eyes are soft as they meet your own, his hands gentle as they seek yours out to cradle them. “I could never be upset at you for prioritizing your own future back then, and I hope you don’t carry any of that burden with you. It was me who was unsure of what was happening in my life, what I wanted to do after high school. And it was wrong of me to try and tie you down with me here.
“If anything, you were the only direction I had in my life. And I was so, so scared I’d lose you to something else. Something better. But when I look back on how selfish I was, how desperate I was to keep you around, I can’t help but feel so guilty. Because I should’ve seen how unhappy you were here, and being with me couldn’t change that.”
Jake’s voice is so fragile you could smash it into a million pieces like fine china. Your eyes blink once, twice, and then your cheeks feel all damp and you can’t hold it in anymore. Jake thumbs at the tears that skid down your skin, and you try to swallow down your erratic hiccups, but even through your sobs, you can feel yourself laughing. Despite your tears, you’re happy.
“I don’t think I was ever unhappy,” you admit. “I was just scared. Scared of getting stuck here like everyone else. Scared I’d never accomplish anything and that I’d waste away the most important years of my life. I was so scared I forgot to think about everything that was worth staying for here. Like you.”
Pulling the box into your lap, you look down at its contents with a teary smile. Though you feel shaken up, there’s an underlying cathartic release to it all– this is the closure that you left without, the closure you thought you were never going to get.
“I hope you don’t mind me taking my tooth home with me,” you tease, pocketing the packaged tooth in your shorts. Looking up, you push the box into Jake’s hands. “You can keep the rest.”
Jake regards you silently, but the look on his face is so soft it makes your ears feel all hot. He nods, looking down into the contents of the box with a smile wide enough to make the edges of his eyes crease up. “I don’t mind,” he muses, “I really did keep a lot of things, huh?”
“It’s cute though!” You’re quick to reassure, and Jake’s answering laughter sounds like fizzy soda pop.
The two of you lounge around on the floor of his bedroom until it’s too hot to even lay around. As Layla enters the room and pounces on you, Jake sits up to look at you while you scratch behind her ears and mumble nonsense to her. “You wanna go in the pool?”
“I didn’t bring my bathers though,” you frown between coos.
“Oh my God,” Jake groans, getting up from the floor and pacing over to his drawers. “You’ve even started speaking like a Melburnian. They’re togs, excuse you, and I can lend you some shorts or something.”
The shorts and shirt he passes you have random cartoons on them and are thankfully dark enough to not go transparent in the water. You clamber up from your spot on the floor and wince as you stretch.
“I’ll change in here,” you tell him. When Jake remains standing in the room with a blank expression, you point towards the door and tell him to shoo.
“Got it chief,” Jake salutes you jokingly, “Layla, let’s go girl.”
“Layla can stay,” you interrupt him, whistling to call her back over. Layla obediently follows, planting herself by your feet and barking at Jake, who remains frozen in the doorway.
“This feels really mean,” he pouts at you, grabbing the door knob to shut the door after him. But even after he closes the door, you can hear his voice in the hallway. “Last one in the pool is a loser!”
Huffing, you look down at Layla and giggle when she nudges your foot as if to say hurry up.
There’s a lightness to your breaths that you swear came after that day at Jake’s. You think it’s silly to attribute it to a mere conversation, but in retrospect, any weight you’d carried before was because of an absence of any such conversation.
You feel good, oddly much so that it’s almost weird. You feel as if the universe had absolved you of all the pain and guilt you had tied to this place, and all you were left with was the fondness and euphoria of finally being back.
Until shit begins hitting the fan soon after.
On an unusually gloomy day for the summer, you and Sunghoon find yourselves on the steps in front of the shop, taking advantage of the opportunity to be outside without experiencing heat stroke symptoms. The concrete is still warm under your legs, enough so that Sunghoon offers up his shirt for you to sit on at one point, but it’s a welcome change from the unpleasant temperatures you’d seen thus far.
It’s Sunghoon’s part of the shift currently, but the store’s been eerily empty for the first half of the day, so you two have taken it upon yourselves to take a well-deserved break. Perks of being your own bosses, and you’re sure your aunt would approve. You’d hardly broken a sweat, and who are you to turn down Sunghoon’s offer of ice cream and a soda?
Besides, listening to Sunghoon fervidly talk about the new tv show he’s started watching while you chow down your cone is a treat of its own. You take the chance to rant about the last weird TikTok you saw while Sunghoon finishes off his own ice cream before it melts.
There’s a natural lull in your conversation at which point you decide to check your phone. Jake’s name is atop most of the notifications on your screen, and you’re not quite sure what to reply to first. Your fingers fidget on the device and you bite your bottom lip, holding back a grin when you finally click on your messages and see a picture of Layla with a hat too big for her head.
“What’re you smiling so much at?” Sunghoon’s voice is teasing, and you have half a second to process his question before he’s cramming into your side and peeking at your phone with prying eyes.
“Hey!” You scold, but it’s too late, because he’s seen the contact name atop, and you can’t think of a lie fast enough before his next question comes.
“You’re texting Jake?” The teasing smirk on his lips melts with the accusatory tone in his voice, and you wince as you lock your screen and hide your phone.
“Why do you sound like that? You’re acting like you’ve just walked in on me trying to hide a body or something!”
Sunghoon’s lips purse and he eyes your side, where you’ve tucked your phone away. “Don’t be ridiculous, this is basically the equivalent.”
“Ridiculous?” You scoff. Something in your throat settles uneasily, and you try not to sound too hurt when you speak again. “I’m just talking to him, Hoon. What are you on about?”
“Really? You’re giving him a second chance after everything he’s done?” Sunghoon fixes you with a dismayed stare, brows furrowed and fists clenched where they rest in his lap. “Do I have to remind you that you left in the first place because of him?”
The lump in your throat grows and you feel like you’ll throw up. Looking away, you blink up at the cloudy sky and try to focus on evening out your breathing. Fights with Sunghoon have never been easy, but fights with Sunghoon about Jake, though rare, always left you numb for days on end.
“I’m not giving him a second chance. We’re friends, testing the waters again, that’s all,” you say meekly. “And I didn’t leave because of him, I was going to study in Melbourne anyway. Stop giving him so much credit.”
Sunghoon’s silence feels like an eternity. You hear him shift next to you, then, out of the corner of your eye, you watch as he stands up. His stare burns into your scalp like the scalding sun. “Even you don’t believe yourself.”
Sunghoon’s eyes are glossy and tender from where you can see them, and it dawns on you that he’s close to crying. His teeth are digging into his bottom lip and his eyebrows are set and furrowed, but you can tell that he’s upset and failing at hiding it.
“It may not seem like it, but it hurt all of us when you stopped keeping in touch after you left,” he continues, wiping at his eyes with his hand. “It sucked a lot. We all thought we lost a good friend forever.”
“Sunghoon,” you call, voice breaking off at the end. You reach out to grab him by the wrist, looking up with wide, apologetic eyes. “Sunghoon, I’m sorry. I’ve always–”
“Had a thing for Jake? Yeah, I know,” he dismisses, smiling shakily. It doesn’t reach his eyes. “I know. And you know I’ve always had a thing for you. But I didn’t let that get in the way ”
“Because it’s not fair to either of us.” You can feel your throat begin to tighten in the same way it does when you’re about to sob, can feel your eyes sting and your heart falter painfully.
Abruptly standing up from the curb, you ignore the way your skin burns from the heated concrete and reach out to envelop Sunghoon into a tight hug. His arms remain limp at his sides for a brief second, until he hears you sniffle and immediately reciprocates the embrace. You close your eyes and inhale deeply, coaxing Sunghoon into rocking back and forth with you.
“I love you,” he says. “I love you so much and I don’t want to see you hurt again.”
Nodding against his shoulder, you pull back to look at him. The rims of his eyes are red and his face is slightly puffy, but you realize he’s no different than the boy you’ve always held so dear to your heart. No matter the distance you’ve spent apart, the disagreements you’ve struggled over, the spats and rocky paths. He’s still your Sunghoon.
“I love you too, Hoonie.” Wiping at one of the tear streaks on his cheekbone, you gently cup his cheek and ignore the way your heart falters when he leans into your touch. “Even if it’s not in the way I wish I could, I still love you so much."
Sunghoon doesn’t say anything for a minute, instead resigning to just closing his eyes and melting against your hand. You hold still all the while, humming softly under your breath until he feels ready to move off.
“Okay, that’s enough of that,” Sunghoon decides. He wipes at the remaining tears on his face, and moves to hold the door to the shop open, gesturing you inside. “I’ve got cookie dough Ben and Jerry’s in the freezer that I need your help finishing. And no, you cannot get out of this.”
Snorting, you step inside and look over your shoulder to tease, “If you seriously think I’d pass on Ben and Jerry’s, we should re-evaluate this friendship.”
Sunghoon laughs, a full-bellied one where you can see the endearingly sharp edges of his teeth and his Adam's apple bob, and closes the door behind him. He doesn’t say anything to that, silently wrapping an arm around your shoulder as he leads you up the stairs. When you look over, he’s still smiling. You think you’ll be okay.
Rolling down the window, you thrust your arm out into the humid evening air and relish in the gust of wind that meets your palm. From your position on the hill, you can see the entirety of the shoreline in all of its tranquil glory, devoid of any visitors and undisturbed in the wake of the sunset.
You think that this is where you’re meant to be– in a quiet world, next to Jake, with every trivial worry left behind.
Jake parks the car underneath the jagged shade of a pandanus tree and races over to the other side to open your door, almost tripping in his haste. Laughing, you step out and help him unload his board from where it’s tied to the roof of the car.
The two of you have routinely begun choosing the same spot on the beach. It’s close enough to the water so that you can reach it without the sand burning your feet, but far enough so that the crashing waves don’t end up touching you. You know it’s the same spot because it’s next to a mosaic made of seashells that has yet to be destroyed.
Jake thinks the mosaic resembles a cityscape, but you think it looks like a blooming rose.
Sometimes, Jake swims around on his board and practices old moves while you watch him keenly. Sometimes, you read an old book or doze off while Jake does laps around the shore. Sometimes, he even invites you into the water with him, and sometimes, you say yes. You mutually bask in the presence of the ocean and each other, and it’s all you really need.
“God, it’s so humid today,” you complain, huffing as you drop your bag onto the sand. Jake hums in agreement and straightens out the blanket so that you can sit down.
“It won’t be getting much worse after this. Summer’s almost over anyway,” Jake says mindlessly, tugging at his own bag and rummaging through it with a pout.
Right. It was at the forefront of your mind until it suddenly wasn’t– leaving again.
The prospect of having to return to a life without Jake and Sunghoon and everyone else you loved here was proving difficult for you to conceptualize. The return ticket sitting in your wallet was long forgotten, tucked away in a pocket and left untouched until now. Your fingers itch to reach for it in your bag, to rip it to shreds and dig it under the sand and forget about it for good.
A nudge on your shoulder snaps you back to the present, and you find Jake holding out a Melona bar in a silent offering. You take it with a wide grin and rip open the plastic without hesitation. You haven’t had these popsicles in a while, probably since the last time Jake bought you one.
“You wanna tell me what you’re thinking about?”
Popping your mouth off of the bar, you lick your lips and crane your neck to look at Jake. He’s in the process of opening his own popsicle, but he’s watching you carefully, almost timidly.
“A bunch of silly shit,” you admit. “Like how I don’t want to go back to Melbourne all that much anymore.”
Jake’s eyes dip across your face, like he’s searching for indications that you’re lying. You think they pause on your lips for the slightest second longer, but then he’s looking away altogether and you don’t know if you can trust yourself.
“I don’t want you to go back to Melbourne either,” he laughs, voice breaking off toward the end. He’s nervous.
“Clingy much?” Your joke’s meant to ease the ache in your chest but it only makes it worse. “It’s fine, you have my number and socials. You can bother me there.”
“We don’t have to talk about this right now. You’ve still got a few weeks anyway, why focus on leaving when we could be making the most of this time?” And Jake’s right. Last you were here, you hadn’t known you wouldn’t be back for a while. You never got a proper goodbye with many people or places. But now you knew, and there was no use mourning the inevitable.
You knew you would be back eventually.
You and Jake finish off your Melona bars and shed your outerwear so you can wade into the water. As your fingertips graze the water by your hips, you close your eyes and wiggle your toes against the sandy floor. You hear Jake dive into the water nearby, followed by a split second of calm before something brushes along your calf and you can’t hold in your terrified shriek.
Looking down, you find Jake peering up at you through the water, his wide grin visible even under the buoyant ripples. He resurfaces with a big splash in front of you, sticking his tongue out at you childishly while you wipe the water from your face. You feel your jaw drop incredulously, and you have half a mind to retaliate and give him a taste of his own medicine.
Jake seems to read your mind, however, because he makes a dash for the shore before you can move to splash him back.
The sand dips beneath the soles of your feet as you chase after Jake, sending water droplets scattering up around you in frantic arcs. You think he’s running toward one of the inlets, the one where there’s a loose rock formation that allows you to venture further into the ocean. He stops where the sand bleeds into dark, jagged rocks, leaving you to catch up to him in seconds.
You barrel into his back and giggle as he turns around to hug you to his chest, shrieking when he lifts you up and your feet kick around aimlessly in the air. Your heart flutters in your throat as you look down to see Jake grinning up at you, eyes crinkled up endearingly and mouth opened around a boisterous laugh. His hands are warm where they’re holding your waist tight, fingers splayed out against your skin.
Jake sets you back down, chest rising and falling rapidly with each breath he takes. Your skin feels impossibly warm even after he’s let you go, and you find yourself unable to look away from him. Against the backdrop of the sun, he looks like an angel.
Wordlessly, he holds out his cupped hand to yours, and you reach out to accept with wide eyes. When he pulls back, you see that he’s left two seashells in the dips of your palms, small and round in shape. The bigger of them is tawny and has a dipping crevice in the middle, while the other is a pristine white with several ridges along its arch. They’re beautiful.
“Do you still collect these?” Jake’s question makes the butterflies in your chest stir.
“I do,” you murmur, feeling oddly bashful that he remembers. “The box is under my bed in Melbourne.”
The same wooden box he’d gifted you for your 16th birthday once you told him you kept all the shells he’d been giving you.
The two of you abandon your blanket and sit on the patch of damp sand you’ve been standing over. The yolk of the sun has begun to slip behind the ocean’s horizon, coloring the water and sky a brilliant red and sending cascading pockets of light along the shore. Jake’s gaze follows the length of the skyline and you can’t help it that yours strays to him.
There’s a rough, pink scar bridging across the length of Jake’s shoulder, one that you’ve never seen before. You’re no stranger to Jake’s recklessness out in the ocean, but the long span of it is unlike the rest you’ve seen on his skin. From its color alone you’re able to tell that he’s gotten it recently, and it hasn’t quite healed yet.
“This one’s new,” he says as if reading your thoughts. Jolting, your eyes snap back to his face to find him looking at you knowingly. “I was too close to an inlet and lost control of my board.”
You hum in response, reaching out to brush your fingertips against the blemished skin. It’s jagged under your touch, warm from where the sun’s kissed it, and you ache to lean down and run your lips over it. Jake exhales softly, head tilting the slightest bit so he can watch you.
“You’ve always been a bit clumsy,” you joke breathlessly, in an attempt to disregard the weird squirming in your chest. But then Jake continues to stare at you silently, and you shift nervously, hand pausing to hover above his back. “Guess you haven’t changed all that much.”
“Neither have you,” Jake mumbles, eyes still caught on your face, “you still look at me like that.”
You burn to ask him what he means, but your heart is stuck in your throat and you don’t think you can speak without saying something you’ll regret.
Yet in a way, you don’t need to ask him what he means. You think there has never been any need for explanations like this. You love Jake, and that’s true without all of the complexities that the statement conjures up. Past or present.
The lapping waves at the shore flood your ears like cotton. Jake’s face is so, so close, and yet it feels like he’s too far away. Like he’s always been.
“Hey,” he whispers, but the word crashes louder in your ears than the waves. “Is it okay if I kiss you?”
You can’t speak, but the eagerness that bleeds into your nod is telling enough of just how you feel. Jake’s warm hand tenderly cups the side of your face to bring you closer, and right as another wave breaks onto the shore, his lips meet yours in an achingly gentle way.
He’s everything you remember– he tastes like ocean brine and spearmint gum and his favorite iced tea, remnants of the past and the future you’d yearned for. The calluses on his palm are familiar where they brush against your jaw as he angles your face to deepen the kiss, and you try not to practically whine into his mouth when his tongue slips past your lips.
Your hand travels up from his shoulder to tangle itself in his hair, weaving your fingers through his locks with an urgency that seems to throw both of you off guard. Jake giggles into the kiss when you tug at the hair at the nape of his neck, and you break off when you feel a string of laughter bubbling out of you in response.
“Wow,” he whistles, face adorably red as he tries to smooth his hair back into place. You snort at his predicament, though you suspect your own state isn’t much far off from his. When Jake reaches out to fix up your hair as well, you go quiet, watching him through your lashes.
The silence you lapse into is silent and comfortable, so unlike the standoffish moments you two shared just a few weeks earlier. The thought of how quickly things between you two changed startles you; you realize that you no longer think twice about all the intimate moments and touches you share with Jake, much less feel guilty for any of them.
The voice at the back of your head is no longer there to whisper incessant reminders of the past, reminders of things you should have never taken with you in your baggage to Melbourne.
“You hungry?” Jake’s question startles you back into the present, and without thinking, you nod eagerly once more. His answering laugh makes the tips of your ears burn red, but you’re far too focused on his proposition of food to care. “There’s a really nice diner in the next town over, and I’d love to take you there.”
“Okay, it’s a date,” you grin.
Jake grins back, and you decide there’s no use holding yourself back anymore. You love him.
Jake’s last competition for the season is scheduled the week before you’re set to leave for Melbourne. It’s a big one– his biggest yet– and in the days leading up to it, you’re not able to catch much of him outside of your shop.
He visits twice. Once to pick up an extra emergency repair kit in case something unpredictable happens during his practice sessions, and once to buy his usual Crunchy Peanut Butter Clif Bar. He tells you he’ll save it for the morning of the competition, kissing you on the cheek and sprinting out the door before you can “distract him further”. Whatever that means.
In a way, you don’t look forward to the competition. It serves as a constant reminder that you’re bound to leave at any moment, and of everything wrong that can happen with Jake out on the ocean. Though every competition carries that same latter risk, this particular one required its attendees to take on some of the highest waves your region had seen in years.
You worried for Jake, and as selfish as it was, for what would come of you two after.
“Stop moping, Jake will still be able to give you dick over in Melbourne,” Sunoo had chastised you one night over dinner, flicking a pickle at you.
You’d dodged it, crumpling up a tissue and tossing it right back at him. “Yeah, but it won’t be the same!”
Sticking to tradition, your friend group had decided to gather one last time for dinner before the tournament day. Jake couldn’t make it– that much was customary, too– and you found yourself glancing at the empty spot in the booth one too many times while eating.
It seemed like you couldn’t avoid talking about your fickle future with Jake, much less thinking about it. You knew that there was another conversation due soon, one which you refused to bother Jake with until he was finished with the season. But it was beginning to eat at you from the inside, slowly gnawing through your defense built on friends’ reassurances.
You’d just finally gotten ahold of Jake again, you weren’t ready to give him up so easily.
The shore is more crowded than you’ve ever seen it. Despite arriving relatively early to the tournament grounds, you and your friends had found the sand chaotically packed, with the only remaining spots to spread out a blanket being near the very back. Stopping by the slanted wooden walkway that leads down to the beach, you survey the entire length of the shore, hoping to find a spot with open space.
“Are you sure we’ve got the right place?” Heeseung frowns at the crowd, scrunching his nose up when a kid screams. Sunghoon shrugs, moving to check his phone.
“Surfing’s a big deal guys,” Sunoo chastises, “what? You don’t believe all these people are here for Jake?”
“I don’t think it’s that,” Jay sets down the cooler he’s holding, stretching his arms out with a groan. “I’ve lived here my whole life and I’ve never seen any beach this packed ever. Even when they had that free-entry hippie festival last summer.”
“There’s literally a poster,” you deadpan, pointing to the information bulletin board off to the side. Half of the board is taken up by a familiar, colorful poster, the same one your entire friend group had adamantly reposted onto your Instagram stories for days, plastered onto its surface. You resist the urge to laugh when a collective ohhh follows at your revelation.
Slowly but surely, your group makes it down to the beach with all of your belongings and elaborate signs, all donning Jake’s signature blue. The competitors are nowhere to be seen, so any plans of seeing Jake before everything begins are thrown out the window. You manage to squeeze yourselves further inward, not quite toward the front, but it’s better than the view you’d have to settle for in the very back.
As all of you busy yourselves with setting up the umbrella and blankets, Sunghoon slips away with the promise of returning with cold drinks. But by the time he makes it back, the audience has gotten impossibly larger, and the cardboard trays in both of his hands begin to teeter as he tries to nudge past the thickening crowd. Sunoo laughs at him, but is quick to rush over and take one of the trays into his own hold.
“This tournament’s for the entire Sunshine Coast,” Sunghoon says in a huff, passing around a plastic cup to everyone. “It’s the biggest event for surfing held in this region in decades. No wonder it’s so crowded.”
“Thanks Hoonie,” you smile. The drink is some odd concoction of fruit punch and other sweet juices you can’t recognize, but it’s refreshing and cold so it’s the most delicious thing to you.
Sunghoon nods, finding purchase on the blanket next to you. He takes a swig of his own drink and pulls back to watch the ice clink around in the cup. “The finalists from today are going to attend Nationals in Sydney. South Bondi, or something like that. That’s what the barista told me.”
Your eyes go impossibly wide, and you almost choke on the liquid in your mouth. Sunghoon pats you on the back while you cough it out, and you put your drink down lest you spill it over yourself. “Nationals? Fuck, I feel like I should know if my boyfriend is trying to qualify for Nationals…”
Jake had mentioned that the gravity of the tournament was greater than any of the previous ones he’d been part of, but you had absolutely no recollection of him mentioning the word nationals. You’re certain you know why he didn’t– the worry swelling in your gut is telling enough. But it’s followed with a burst of pride in your chest that makes you feel so giddy you’re sure the grin on your face looks stupid.
Once your coughing fit’s over, you reach down to pick up your cup and take another sip. But it’s then that you sense four pairs of eyes on you, and you look over to find your friends gawking at you. You curl in on yourself subconsciously, grin slowly melting at their expressions. “…What?”
“Boyfriend?” Sunoo all but yells, breaking the silence. The people around you throw weird looks in your direction, but you don’t pay them any mind.
“That’s what I said, didn’t I?” You surmise that the dramatics aren’t unprompted in this situation because you truly hadn’t found a way to break your friends the news yet either, but could anyone blame you? In your eyes, there was no subtle way of announcing it.
“Ha! Heeseung, you owe me 100 bucks,” Jay claps, reaching to high five you. You return the gesture with an exasperated face, not too keen on being stuck between their childish feuds.
Heeseung dishes out the money from his wallet with a sour expression, handing it to Jay and shoving a middle finger in his face.
“No one’s going to congratulate her?” Sunghoon finally speaks up, clicking his tongue and shaking his head. “Shame on all of you.” Turning to you, he whispers, “Congrats, by the way.”
The other’s enthusiastic good wishes follow suit, and you can’t help the jaw-aching smile that splits your face. You pick up your cup and chase the last of the liquid in there, both to hide your grin and to quench your growing thirst.
By now, you’d gotten more than used to the routine of surf tournaments. You knew when to expect different sections, how long you’d be able to watch Jake out in the waves, and when to anticipate the final minutes. As the music from the judge’s panel diminishes and is replaced by a cheery, high-pitched voice, you sit back against the blanket and get comfortable.
The participants are all introduced with grandiose speeches that make the speakers crackle from the deafening volume. You make sure to whoop and holler extra loud when Jake Sim is announced, squinting against the beaming sun to try and spot his face among the line of surfers.
Jake clears all of his heats with an astounding performance and form. The audience oohs in tandem with each of his moves, and you have to prop yourself up on your knees halfway through to be able to properly see your boyfriend. You cheer and clap animatedly after he completes each series, heart beating faster with each swelling wave that he meets.
The judging panel also seems to love him. From the way they refuse to break their staring while he’s out on the waves to write anything, to the way they mumble amongst each other with dazed looks on their faces after every particularly difficult trick, you can’t help but feel proud. It’s almost disappointing watching him paddle toward shore and give way to the competitor after him.
Despite the intimidating waves, Jake handles himself well and is able to clear through his routine with ease. He doesn’t lose control of his board even for a moment, braving into the highest waves you’d ever seen him take on. The other participants also seemed to be doing well– though not quite as well as Jake– and you find yourself applauding and cheering after some particularly hard routines.
You think it should come as no surprise to anyone on that packed shore that Jake scores a remarkable lead in first place. He carries the highest wave scores throughout most of the tournament, only bettering them further as the heats pass. You get to watch him perform moves you’d never seen before, moves you’d only seen on the news performed by Australia’s best. He’s truly breathtaking in the water– you know you’d think this no matter who he was to you.
The awards ceremony almost makes you burst into tears. Jake’s gold medal is handed over by the main judge, who shakes his hand and pats him on the back as Jake accepts it with a deep bow. He reaches over to wrap his arms around the shoulders of the competitors who’d won second and third place, congratulating them with an earnest smile. When the flashes from the photographers become impossible to ignore, Jake turns to the cameras and brings his medal up to his mouth, biting down on it cheekily.
The crowd doesn’t begin to thin out for a long while. You’re not able to reach Jake until half an hour after the ceremony’s ended, your boyfriend occupied with on-the-spot interviews and eager fans waiting for a photo together. Meanwhile, Sunoo and Jay race back to the car to bring out the bouquet and balloons that you’d brought to surprise Jake.
When Jake is finally able to attend to his personal matters, he all but runs barefoot on the sand towards you, opening his arms in warning once he’s close enough. You yelp at the tight hug you’re all but swept up into, feet kicking out in the air under you when Jake lifts you and begins spinning you. 
“I’m so happy right now!” He shouts toward the sky, voice breathy from exhilaration.
“I’m so proud of you!” You shout back, ruffling his damp hair. The fringe falls into his face and you push it back so you can lean down and kiss him.
“I take back my congratulations,” Heeseung speaks up from behind you, and Jake sticks his tongue out at him before putting you down carefully. He moves to pat your boyfriend on the back, grin so wide it takes up half his face. “Just kidding. That was sick Jake, you killed it out there.”
Sunghoon and Jay echo the statement and barrel into Jake’s sides to hug him, wrangling him into their holds so they can hold him up in the air. Jake doesn’t even bother fighting against them, accepting the inevitable with a fond grin and rolling his eyes once they let up and put him back on the sand.
“And obviously he’s going to kill it in Sydney too,” Sunoo brandishes the bouquet from behind his back, holding it out for Jake to take.
Jake’s face flushes cutely as he accepts the flowers and balloons, posing for photos as you whip out your phone. The thin gold metal sits like a sun against his chest, illuminated with beams as you instruct Jake to turn toward the horizon. You decide that you’re going to set this one as your homescreen later.
As a few more of Jake’s friends from the academy come up to him to personally congratulate him, you hang back and watch him with a smile. Despite growing up, learning more tricks, and climbing his way to your region’s top spots, Jake’s humble attitude hadn’t changed. He still met the hand of fellow surfers and treated them like equals despite any rankings, refusing to let anyone put him up on an invisible pedestal.
The shore has somewhat cleared out by now, most of the people remaining being the competitors themselves and their friends and families. It’s no longer hot enough to make you feel like bursting, and you decide to jog down to the water to dip your feet into the ocean. The water’s cool against your warm skin, the tiny waves lapping at your ankles in rhythmic motions as you stand there and soak in the last of the afternoon sun.
Jake joins you along with the rest of your friends sometime later. You all stand ankle-deep in the water quietly, and when you look over at them, you can’t help the fond grin that blooms on your face.
“Are we celebrating at Auntie Lee’s?” Heeseung suddenly breaks the silence, and you can’t help but burst into laughter.
“We could,” Sunghoon shrugs. “Or we could just hang out here for a while.”
“Jake and I will join you guys later,” you say shyly, reaching for Jake’s hand. “I have to steal him away for a bit right now.”
“Thanks, I just threw up a little bit in my mouth,” Jay faux-gags, pretending to vomit. You pay him no mind.
You and Jake bid your friends goodbye with the premise that they’ll join you later and load his surfboard onto his car. When you finally set off toward your aunt’s shop, you heave a sigh of relief and lean back in the seat. The air conditioner’s broken now, meaning you have to rely on a crammed open window for pockets of fresh air, but even amidst the sweltering heat of the late afternoon, you’ve never felt better.
“I’m hoping that’s a good sigh,” Jake speaks up from the driver’s seat, “I’m driving as fast as the law allows me to, we’re almost there.”
Snorting, you lean against the door in an attempt to catch as much of the breeze filtering in. It’s a bit tricky, given that most of the surface is hot from sitting in the sun. “It’s good, I promise. Just really happy that everything went well with your tournament. And that I have you all to myself now.”
The food you’d prepared for him earlier in the day is sitting in the kitchen, lidded and ready to be portioned out. You and Sunghoon had dug out your aunt’s fancy dinner plates from the basement and cleaned them off for the occasion, setting the table with them in a manner decidedly too formal now that you’re looking at it again. There’s even a candle in the middle, awfully regal in its glass holder and waiting to be lit.
Jake snorts, but it’s fond. He loops an arm around your shoulder and kisses your cheek. “You didn’t have to do all of this for me.”
“I felt like cooking something nice for myself,” you tease. Kissing his cheek back, you move to shrug him off of you so you can sit down. “It just happened that your tournament was also today. Don’t let it get to your head.”
“How can I not when my girlfriend prepared a feast for me,” Jake exclaims, sitting down next to you and rubbing his hands. He peers closer at the dishes, eyes going wide at the contents of a particular pot. “Dude, galbitang? Just say you want to marry me and go.”
Your ears feel impossibly hot as you reach for the ladle and begin pouring some of the soup into your bowl. “Hey, less talking, more eating.”
If Jake notices your flushed face, he doesn’t say anything. Instead, he silently reaches out with his chopsticks to begin filling your plate with the dumplings you’d made.
As much as you’d like to, the meal is too hefty for you to jump Jake straight after. Once the both of you finish eating and put away the remaining food, you wound up in your aunt’s living room, on her vintage floral couch that’s draped with a nostalgic white sheet.
Jake laughs when he sees it, carefully sitting in the middle so as not to get onto the actual couch. “God, I remember sitting here when we were kids, and your aunt wouldn’t let us watch TV unless we kept the couch covered.”
“I swear no one’s actually touched the real surface of the couch since she bought it in the 90s,” you groan as you settle into the cushions next to Jake. You feel pleasantly groggy, like you could fall asleep at any minute, and it doesn’t help that Jake is so warm and comfortable. “Remember that one time we tried sneaking in TimTams to eat here? I’ve never seen her angrier.”
“That was your idea, by the way, and second, I think she was angrier when we tried to hose down her roses in the backyard. Why were we so evil as kids?” Jake’s head finds its way onto your shoulder, and you try not to shake as you giggle.
Looking at the black TV screen across from you, you make out the matching smiles on both of your faces. It makes your stomach swoop, but you don’t think it’s from the good food you just had. Closing your eyes, you breathe in Jake’s shampoo and sigh. “I miss her a lot, I can’t wait for her to be back.”
You don’t notice you’ve begun dozing off until Jake startles next to you from a buzz in his pocket. Confused, you straighten up and watch as he looks down at his phone with a frown, rubbing at his eyes.
“Shit, Sunghoon texted me that they’re going to be back soon,” he mumbles.
“That sucks,” you say.
The two of you stare at each other for five still seconds, before Jake tosses his phone behind him on the couch and you practically pounce on him. You stagger onto your feet and pull Jake up with you, laughing as you all but race to your room down the hallway. Pushing open the door, you loop your arms around his neck and bring him in for a needy kiss, one you’ve been holding back all afternoon.
Jake shuts the door behind both of you, giggling against your lips when you huff impatiently. Your fingers sidle up under the hem of his shirt, brushing urgently against the heated skin you find. It was getting harder and harder to reel your self control back in around him, and now that you two were alone, you could barely resist jumping him like a predator. But who could blame you?
You also barely resist the triumphant noise that teeters behind your lips once Jake finally relents and takes his shirt off. It’s discarded somewhere in a corner of your room, forgotten as soon as it’s out of your sight. Your hands are back on him quicker than he can turn around, and when he leans down to press his lips against yours again, you feel him smile into the kiss.
“Jake,” you pant, palms drifting up his back with newfound desperation, “Jake, please.”
“Please what?” He teases, breaking off into a surprised groan when you lean down to bite his neck, suckling on the skin and running your tongue over the purpling bruise you leave behind.
Neglecting him of an answer, you continue your venture down his neck until you reach his collarbones. His hands are purposeful where they dip under your shirt to paw at the skin of your tummy and lower back, nudging the material higher and higher until you break off from his neck to take it off altogether.
Jake doesn’t let you continue marking him– instead, he’s the one that incessantly attaches his lips to your chest, tongue lathing over your nipple leisurely. His hand envelopes your other breast and kneads it while your breathing grows laborious, your head falling back as you weave your fingers through his hair. When he switches his attention to your other nipple, you decide you’ve waited long enough.
“If you don’t do something more I’m seriously going to explode,” you warn him, pulling him away from your chest. Jake barks a laugh, wiping at the spit on his chin with the back of his hand before letting you lead him toward your bed.
You fall backwards on the mattress easily, Jake towering over you with heady eyes. He picks up where he left off, plush lips dipping between your breasts and traveling further down with fervent motions.
“You’re so pretty,” he mumbles against the skin of your hip. The warmth fanning from his breath makes you go lax in his hold, and you hazily blink up at the ceiling in an effort to ground yourself.
His nimble fingers slip under the edges of your shorts, and with one quick look at your desperate nods, he begins tugging the material, along with your underwear, down your legs. Discarding the garment somewhere behind him, he hooks one of your knees over his shoulder, angling your other thigh outwards until you’re comfortably spread out for him. You inhale sharply at the cold air that meets your sensitive area, but the feeling is short-lived.
Jake leans in with an eagerness that has your breath catching in your throat. His lips suction right on your clit, and it takes every effort within you not to buck your hips wantonly into the feeling. His free hand settles warmly on your hip bone like a promise, holding you down against the sheets with a strength that only makes you squirm more.
Whining, you try to slow your breathing as his calloused fingers travel up your inner thigh and brush against your sopping entrance teasingly, where they catch strings of your growing arousal. You’re not normally this sensitive, already wriggling and gasping at the mere brush of his touch, but you reason that it’s because it’s him touching you.
You tense as one of his forefingers prods into you, slowly at first, then with a cocky certainty that makes you see stars. He sinks it into you until his last knuckle, curling it against your walls with growing fervor as you relax in his hold. As Jake adds a second finger, you reach out to weave your fingers through his locks, mewling when his grip on your hips tightens.
“I missed you so much,” he hums into your cunt between rolls of his tongue, groaning when you tug on his hair. “Fuck, you’ve been driving me crazy for such a long time. Can’t believe you’re finally mine again.”
Something in your chest squeezes, and you look down at him with glassy eyes.
It’s a sight that knocks the breath out of you. Jake’s eyes meet yours over the curve of your abdomen, and he takes the moment to lewdly spit directly onto your clit. He massages the saliva with tight figure eight motions, and combined with the rhythmic pumping from his other hand, it makes you feel like you’ll burst.
“I’m close,” you whisper, voice raw and spent. You feel strung out, like you’ve been stuck on the verge of an orgasm for an hour, when it probably has been five minutes at most.
Jake’s fingers squelch when he speeds up his motions, lapping incessantly at your clit as you continue to writhe helplessly. He looks up at you with dark eyes, fingers curling at just the right angle, and it’s enough to send you over the edge.
You come with a drawn-out whine, fingers clutching at his hair with desperation. You feel your thighs quiver before they settle on the mattress around Jake, exhaling deeply as you lean back into the sheets to calm down.
“Holy shit,” you laugh, covering your face as Jake crawls up next to you. He kisses the back of your hands, peppering more kisses along your arms, chest, neck, and whatever parts of your face he can reach. It only makes you giggle more, shying away from his affection with a racing heart.
“So good to me,” he mumbles, finally pressing his lips to yours. You sigh, looping your arms around his neck and leaning into his adoring touch with uncharacteristic bashfulness. Jake holds you like you’re made out of china, like you’re something precious, and the implications of that make your own heart throb with fondness.
Pulling away from the kiss, you push back on his chest gently, shuffling around so that you can sit up. “Lay down, I wanna ride you.”
You crawl over to one of your bedside drawers, tugging the top compartment open and feeling around until you can find what you’re looking for. As Jake leans back against the headboard and makes quick work of discarding his pants and boxers, you fish out the condom and join him so you can perch yourself on his lap. You tear open the foil, discarding it somewhere off to the side, and hold it up between you two like a gem.
“You’ve been planning for this, huh?” He teases, but you ignore him in favor of rolling the condom down his length. He watches you all the while, sucking in air through his teeth when you touch a particularly sensitive part of him.
“It’s hard not to when my boyfriend is so hot,” you answer, leaning down to kiss him again. His hands settle on your hips, and when you grind down on him experimentally, he practically moans into your mouth.
Leaning back on his lap, you reach down to align him with your entrance, pouting when your first two attempts to press him in fail. He’s awfully slippery with the lubricated condom, and you’re awfully nervous about the whole situation, so it’s no wonder your hands shake as you attempt to do it again. You let out a frustrated laugh, frowning when his cock flops back onto his stomach and you’re left hovering above his lap.
“Let me,” he whispers, gripping his length and holding your hip attentively. He pushes his tip in slowly, eyes trained on your face for any signs of discomfort, and biting his lip as he sinks further. About halfway in, you feel him pause reluctantly, and you hiss as you clench around him.
“Love, you’ve got to relax. I don’t want to hurt you.”
“I know, I’m sorry,” you mumble, looking away from him when you feel your face begin to burn from embarrassment. Jake’s hands envelop your sides to bring you close to him, and you bury yourself in his shoulder as he slips out from underneath you. “I’m just really nervous. Don’t want to mess this up.”
His hand begins to draw patient, comforting circles on your lower back. You feel your breaths begin to even out, along with your racing heart, and you turn your head to leave grateful kisses along Jake’s neck. He shudders and hugs you tighter. “You’re okay. Let me know when you’re ready.”
And that’s the thing– because despite running from your feelings, running from him, Jake has never once let his patience run thin with you. He’s always been right there, waiting for you to come back, waiting for you to love him back with the same certainty that he always has.
It feels entirely unfair. But as you look back at his glittering eyes, at the handfuls of adoration in each of them, you feel your jitteriness slip away and become replaced with wholehearted sureness.
“I’m ready,” you say with conviction, pulling back to rest your hands on his toned chest. “Jake Sim, I’m about to rock your fucking world.”
Jake’s laughter sounds like bells in the springtime. He leans back to watch you push him back in, letting out a drawn-out sigh when he bottoms out and the backs of your thighs meet his hips. The shaky moan that slips from you feels too loud in the quietness of your bedroom, but you can't find it in you to feel shy as Jake’s cock drags leisurely against your walls.
Despite how weak you feel, you’re able to build up a steady rhythm with your hips. With each downward thrust, you revel in the way Jake’s eyes follow you, and in the soft sounds that are coaxed out of his mouth. You reach out to push away the fringe that has fallen into his face, cupping his face for a brief moment before your hand snakes down between your bodies to rub at your clit.
You keen at the feeling, but your fingers are quickly replaced by Jake’s own, which nudge at the bundle of nerves with growing urgency. His hips are rocking back up in tandem with your thrusts, eyebrows furrowed and lips wrapped around a breathy moan that reverberates around the room and makes the heat in your stomach triple.
You feel like a mess; you’re breathing heavy and your skin’s all sweaty and your thighs are burning with the effort to make both of you feel good. But Jake looks at you like you’re the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen, and it makes you forget about everything else.
“I’m really close,” you breathily laugh. Your hips begin to stutter as you feel the growing wave in your abdomen swell higher and higher with each of your motions, slowly losing all sense of coordination. Jake doesn’t seem to mind all too much though.
“Me too,” he mumbles the sentiment. The flush on his face has spread to his neck and chest, a pleasant rhubarb shade that you can make out even in the darkness. He’s so lovely, and all yours.
Jake’s thumb on your clit hastily adds more pressure as your breath quickens. Your vision grows blurry at the edges but you can’t look away from Jake, whose eyes are boring into yours.
“Jake, I’m so close, m’cumming, God, please, Jake–” your babbling is cut off when your orgasm hits you like a tidal wave, pulling you under and rendering you breathless. You distantly feel your thighs shake around Jake’s hips as you ride it out, followed by a drawn out groan from his side when he hits his own high.
Your heart is pounding in your ears when you slip Jake out of you, and you barely have enough energy to roll off of him before flopping down on the bed. You still don’t quite feel like you’re on the ground, brain all mushy and struggling to piece the night’s events together. A part of you is convinced you’re dreaming, if the hazy ringing in your ears is anything to go by.
“Sweet girl,” Jake coos, brushing the hair that’s gotten in your face. He reaches over the side of the bed to fish his underwear out from the messy pile, tugging the briefs on and standing up. “I’ll be right back, okay?”
The ceiling of your room is bleached a moon white from the light streaming in outside. You listen with a racing heart and heaving chest as Jake rummages around in your bathroom, returning seconds later with a damp rag in hand. He maneuvers your legs around so he can wipe up the worst of your mess, gently hushing you when you whine from the drag of it against your sensitive skin.
“I really hope Sunghoon and the others aren’t back yet,” he quietly giggles, discarding the rag off to the side once he’s cleaned himself up.
“We warned them earlier,” you mumble sleepily. You can already feel an ache settling into your knees and lower back, but decide that it’s a problem for tomorrow’s you to worry about.
Jake lays down next to you and props himself up on his elbow to look at you. Even in the bleak darkness, you can make out the way his eyes won’t drift away from you, the way their edges crinkle when you giggle. Feeling shy, you pull the blanket up to your chin and try to hide behind it.
Jake doesn’t take any of it though. He slips right under the blanket with you, fingers immediately reaching for your sides to try and tickle you. You give up almost immediately, shrieking with laughter and begging him to stop while your feet thrash around.
“You can’t hog the whole thing,” he laughs, “I’m getting cold out here!”
Instead of answering, you drop the blanket on top of both of you and use your free arm to loop around his neck, bringing him in for a tight hug. You nudge your face into his bare chest and kiss him on one of his older scars, whose outline is so faint you can barely make it out anymore.
“How are you feeling?” Jake whispers.
He moves to wrap an arm around your waist and you throw one of your legs over his hips. He’s warm, and you can faintly hear his thrumming heart and each breath he takes. His hand is pleasant against your lower back where he traces meaningless shapes into the curve of your spine.
“I love you so much,” you answer. And you mean it.
Jake’s hand continues without pause, and you think you feel him smile against the top of your head. His lips are soft where they press a kiss to your hair.
“I love you too,” he says. And you know he means it.
Melbourne Central has always felt like hell, but today it seems exceptionally so.
You’d think the entire city has spilled into the railway station at once with how crowded the platforms are, each person practically shoulder to shoulder with the next. After an entire day of traveling, you’re beyond spent and in desperate need to be back home, so it’s with tired feet that you attempt to trudge through the chaos.
“Don’t get lost on me now,” you hear Jake’s familiar voice from next to you, and the weight from your luggage on your hand disappears. “Hold onto me, I need to make sure I deliver you in one piece or Sunghoon’s going to kill me.”
You loop your arm around Jake’s bicep and wince as he maneuvers the both of you through the crowd. Both of you begin to sound like broken records with how often you’re mumbling pardon us and different variations of sorry as you squeeze yourselves past different groups of people. Overhead, the announcer’s monotone voice about a delayed train arrival blends into the amalgamated mess of noise in the station, and you swear you’re going to go insane if you don’t get out of there fast.
Outside, the pleasant autumn sun has you squinting up at the sky and reveling in the fresh air that greets you. Jake tells you that the taxi he ordered is here, and you have only a few seconds to take in the world around you before you’re being whisked away again. As you haul your luggage into the back of the car and cram into the back with your boyfriend, you lean over to watch the city pass you by through the window and tune everything else out.
It’s weird, being in the same position you were in just a few months ago. Familiar buildings fly you by but you’re no longer stricken by grief or holding back tears as you watch them disappear. The feeling in your chest is bittersweet– you’re looking back on this summer with a smile and a warm heart. You’d reconciled with everything you’d been avoiding, and came back with more than you could’ve ever hoped for.
“We’re here,” Jake says, and you blink your hazy thoughts away. Looking over, you find that he has one of your hands in his own, thumb smoothing over your skin gently as if he can read your mind. You smile, squeeze his hand, and step out of the taxi.
Against your complaints, Jake takes on doing most of the work of taking your luggage up to your apartment. He doesn’t let you carry any of the heavier bags, rushing to grab them once he’s hauled them out of the taxi before you can even reach for them. You’re left trailing behind him, trying not to make your leering too obvious as his arms bulge under the weight of your luggage.
The door to your apartment opens with a high-pitched squeak. You trudge in slowly, taking in the sun-lit hall with wide eyes. It’s exactly like you remember leaving it, but now Jake’s standing in the middle of the tiny space, looking around with a grin so earnest it makes your heart swell. You know that it’s only a matter of time before everything here reminds you of him too.
“We’ve got some cleaning to do,” Jake notes as he passes by the dusty shelf in your living room. Looking out the floor-length window that takes up the entirety of one of the walls, he whistles and turns to you with his face lit up. You distantly think it reminds you of a smiling dog, only that his tongue isn’t out. “Yo, this view’s crazy! You can see so much of the center from here. I’d kill to be waking up to this every morning.”
“We do have some nice surfing spots a short drive away,” the implications of your words are clear as day, and Jake’s eyes narrow at you playfully. “What? I’m just saying.”
Jake looks out the window again, humming as his eyes trace the edges of the buildings that stand out against the horizon. You feel a bit nervous being so brazen with your future intentions, but everything Jake’s said and done so far has led you to believe he’s on the same page. “I’ll think about it when I finish this term. I’m serious about getting my degree, but I’m not against seeing your pretty face when I come home every day.”
Nodding, you try not to let the excitement bleed out onto your face, but it’s impossible when Jake’s words sound like a promise. “Hey, when do you need to go back for uni, anyway?”
“My term doesn’t start for another week,” he glances back at you and pouts. “Why are you trying to get rid of me so soon?”
You can feel the tips of your ears reddening and you quickly shake your head. “No no, I just wanted to make sure you don’t end up missing your own important stuff. I’d want you to stay here forever if it were up to me.”
“Right,” Jake drawls, and he rounds the couch to attach himself to your back. You feel every curve of him pressed up against you, and with the way his arms snake around your waist and his hands inch under your shirt, you know exactly where this is headed. “Just so you know, you couldn’t get rid of me even if you wanted to.”
“And just so you know, the building in front of us can see everything through these windows,” you say, but Jake’s hands remain incriminatingly low on your hips.
You feel the sigh of his laughter fan out against your neck and your breath hitches. “That’s fine, you’ve still gotta show me your bedroom anyway. So I know where to put our bags.”
“Mhm,” you agree, and the disappointed noise you make when he lets go of you is embarrassingly loud. Jake giggles, and you waste no time in dragging him by the wrist through your apartment.
“My bed’s big enough for the both of us, so you can just sleep with me while you’re here,” you open your bedroom door and usher Jake in after you. It’s cute how nervous he looks standing around, unsure of where to sit or what to look at first. “And stop making that face! You’d think I kidnapped you and I’m holding you hostage.”
After enough coaxing and changing into clean clothes, you and Jake both end up sitting on the edge of your bed, but his mannerisms are still telling of how anxious he feels. His movements are all jittery and his hands run repeatedly over his knees, almost like he’s wiping the sweat off his palms. “It’s just crazy to think about the fact that you have a whole different life here. I don’t know where I’m supposed to fit in, and it’s really hitting me now that I’m actually here, y’know?”
“Jake,” you softly prompt him to look at you, frowning when his eyes meet yours and you see the same uncertainty that you were struggling with in them. You cup his face gently and thumb at the skin of his cheek, whispering, “I can promise you that you’ve got nothing to worry about. There’s more than enough space for you in my life. There always has been.”
With the way he leans into your touch, you can tell that he believes you.
You both lay back against the mattress, if only to rest for a second before you know you’ll have to inevitably get up again. But before you can move to sit up, Jake’s hovering above you with a knowing grin, and you can’t complain much as he leans in to press his lips against yours. It’s soft at first, nothing more, but then he’s cupping your jaw and slipping his tongue in between your lips and you know where this is headed.
“We should unpack first,” you half-heartedly mumble between kisses. Jake begins kissing down your neck, and you groan, head falling backwards. Your words come out increasingly less convincing with each vowel, until there’s absolutely zero conviction in everything you’re saying. “We should really… we’ll be too lazy later…”
“That’s no way to welcome your guest,” Jake pouts against your skin. 
You let him continue venturing down your neck until he’s slipping the shoulder of your t-shirt off, eager to get his mouth on your chest, when you startle in his hold and make him pause. “You alright?”
“Yeah, I just have something to show you,” you laugh, sitting up and scooting to the edge of your bed. You clamber down onto the ground and look under your bed, reaching out to unearth the box you’d suddenly remembered.
“The box of seashells you gave me,” you tell Jake. You place the box carefully on your bed and begin to rummage through your backpack for the ones he’d given you right before kissing you.
The box is a tiny wooden thing with a metal clasp in the front that opens with a bit of force. You open it and let Jake peek inside, placing your newest additions inside with careful hands. Jake’s jaw is slack as his fingers poke at the different seashells you’d accumulated over the years of knowing him, bottom lip jutting out as he turns to look at you.
“You really kept all of them,” he mumbles in awe.
“Well I wasn’t going to throw them away.” You joke, closing the box and placing it on your nightstand. “Besides, they meant a lot to me. Still do.”
Wordlessly, Jake leans down to kiss your exposed shoulder. He rests his cheek against the skin there, and you reach out to card one of your hands through his unruly hair. It’s not damp from the ocean or sandy after one of his surfing sessions. It’s soft under your fingers, tousled after a long day of traveling, and it smells faintly of mint. 
“You know what I think?”
Jake hums questioningly, peering up at you through his lashes.
“I think we should shower. Then continue where we left off, if you still want, and then nap. Like for a while. And then we can go to that diner down the street I kept telling you about.”
Jake smiles against your shoulder and leans up to kiss you on the nose. You cup one of his cheeks and thumb at the faint freckle near his temple. He looks beautiful, like all of the sunsets you’d seen in your hometown, all of the seashells you’d collected, and all of the roses in your aunt’s backyard.
The edge of Jake’s lips quirks up at your offer. You kiss him before you can respond, and revel in the dazed look and breathy response you draw from him. He’s beautiful, and all yours. “Yeah, I think that sounds like a great idea.”
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author's note: if you've read all the way down to here i hope your pillow is cold on both sides, always. i worked very hard on this baby and i hope that whoever reads it enjoys it at least a fraction of the amount that i enjoyed writing it 🤍 if you did enjoy, leave a comment and reblog, it means the world to me!!! support your writers!
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pucksandpower · 1 month
Text
Young Love and Old Money
Max Verstappen x Stroll!Reader
Summary: Max quickly learns that life with the paddock’s favorite nepo baby as his girlfriend is never boring
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You take a deep breath as the town car pulls up to the grand arched doorway of your family’s Montreal estate. Beside you, Max squeezes your hand gently.
“Don’t worry, schatje,” he says, “Your father will love me.”
You smile nervously. “I hope so. But you know how protective he can be.”
Max grins. “I can handle it.”
The driver opens the door and you step out into the crisp night air, your heels clicking on the cobblestone. Max follows, straightening his suit jacket.
Inside, the foyer glitters with crystal chandeliers. A maid hurries to take your coats. As she leads you to the formal dining room, your heart pounds.
This dinner needs to go perfectly.
Your father and Lance are already seated at the long mahogany table, chatting. They look up as you enter and break into smiles.
“Y/N!” Your father exclaims warmly, standing to embrace you. “So wonderful to see you, mon minou.”
You hug him tightly back. “You too, Papa.”
Lance grins as he hugs you next. “Hey sis. Long time no see.”
You playfully mess up his hair. “Too long, little bro.”
Finally, you turn to Max, who is waiting patiently. “Papa, Lance, you already know my boyfriend, Max.”
Max steps forward confidently and shakes their hands. “Mr. Stroll, Lance, it’s an honor to finally meet you both properly.”
Your father looks Max up and down appraisingly. “The honor is mine, Max. Please, call me Lawrence.”
You let out a small sigh of relief as you all take your seats. So far, so good.
The first course is brought out — a decadent lobster bisque. You all sip appreciatively.
“Delicious,” Max compliments.
“I’m glad you’re enjoying it,” your father says graciously. “Now, tell me Max, how is your season going so far?”
You tense slightly. Here it comes, the interrogation.
But Max just smiles. “It’s been excellent. A few tough races, but I’m leading the championship at the moment. The car has great pace and I think we have a shot at the title again this year.”
Lance jumps in enthusiastically. “I saw your battle with Charles last race when I was rewatching the tape. Epic stuff, man!”
“Thanks, mate,” Max chuckles. “It was a fun one for sure.”
You exhale in relief. Max is charming them perfectly.
The conversation flows easily through the next few courses. You can’t help but gaze admiringly at Max as he seamlessly meshes with your family. He has a natural confidence and charisma that puts everyone at ease.
Over dessert, your father says warmly, “Max, I can see why my Y/N cares for you. You’re clearly an exceptional young man, both on and off the track.”
Max smiles, touched. “Thank you, sir. Y/N is very special to me.” He squeezes your hand.
You beam, your heart swelling. This is going even better than you hoped.
You finish up the chocolate mousse and set down your spoon contentedly. “That was delicious. This dinner has been wonderful, thank you Papa.”
“Of course,” your father says fondly. “I’m so glad you both could make it out here from Monaco.”
“Thank you for having me,” Max adds.
“Anytime,” Lawrence smiles.
You glance around the table happily. Your boyfriend fits right in with your family. Everything feels so natural and perfect.
“Daddy, could you please pass the sugar?” You ask amiably.
Immediately, both Max and your father’s hands reach for the small pot of sugar in the center of the table. They both freeze awkwardly for a second, before Lawrence pulls his hand back slowly.
You feel your stomach drop as you see the dawning realization cross your father’s face.
Oh no.
This is bad.
Lawrence’s smile becomes forced. “So tell me Max, what exactly does my daughter call you?”
Max’s eyes widen almost imperceptibly. “Um, just Max usually.”
You sink down in your chair, wincing.
Your father lets out a hollow laugh. “Is that so? Because it didn’t sound like that to me.”
A leaden silence descends on the table. Lance glances between you all, smothering a smirk.
Max clears his throat awkwardly. “Well, uh, that’s just a casual nickname really ...”
Lawrence raises an eyebrow. “A casual nickname you say? For my daughter to call her boyfriend in front of her family?”
You close your eyes, willing yourself to vanish. This is excruciatingly embarrassing.
“Dad, come on,” Lance snickers, clearly enjoying your discomfort. “They’re young, it’s whatever.”
“No Lance, it’s not whatever,” your father snaps, an edge in his voice now. “I would like Max to explain himself here.”
Max holds up his hands placatingly. “Sir, I apologize if we’ve made you uncomfortable. But I assure you our relationship is completely respectful.”
You nod quickly. “Papa, he’s right. Can we please just move on?”
But Lawrence is unyielding. “I will not have anyone take liberties with my daughter, do you understand me, young man?”
Max looks properly chastened. “Yes sir, of course. I meant no offense.”
Your father bristles as he glares between you. The awkward tension hovers for several painful moments.
Finally, you can’t take it anymore. “Papa, stop!” You blurt out. “I’m an adult now. You can’t control what I choose to do with my boyfriend.”
Lawrence looks stunned, then hurt. “Y/N, I’m just looking out for you ...”
“I know, but I don’t need protecting from Max. He’s wonderful and he makes me so happy. Can’t you let me make my own choices?”
Your father’s expression softens. He sighs. “You’re right. I’m sorry. It’s just … so hard for me to think of you growing up.”
You reach over and squeeze his hand. “I know. But I’ll always be your little girl.”
Lawrence smiles tenderly at you, then turns to Max. “Forgive my outburst, son. I can see how much you care for each other.”
Max looks relieved. “Of course, sir. I understand completely.”
You let out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding. Crisis averted.
Your father stands, raising his glass. “To young love. May you always treat my daughter with the honor and respect she deserves.”
“I will, sir,” Max promises earnestly.
You all clink glasses, the tension dissolving. Conversation resumes, lighter and more relaxed now.
Later, as Max helps you on with your coat, your father claps him warmly on the back. “Thank you for making my daughter so happy. You’ll always be welcome in our home.”
Max’s face lights up. “Thank you, sir. That means the world.”
Lawrence winks. “I was young once too, you know. Just maybe keep the nicknames to yourselves around me.”
You all laugh together. Your heart swells with joy. Despite the awkward moments, the evening couldn’t have gone better.
As the chauffeur drives off into the night, you snuggle contentedly into Max’s shoulder. “Thank you for being so wonderful tonight,” you whisper.
He kisses your hair. “Of course, liefje. I would do it all over again for you.”
***
The sleek red Ferrari glints under the showroom lights as you and Max admire your reflection in the gleaming curves.
“She’s a beauty, isn’t she?” Max grins, running his hand along the hood. “I can’t wait to take her out on the open road.”
You smile at his childlike enthusiasm. “She certainly is gorgeous. You have great taste, babe.”
The salesman steps forward eagerly. “Yes, the Ferrari SF90 Stradale is our newest supercar model. Twin-turbo V8, 720 horsepower. She’ll do 0 to 60 in under three seconds.”
Max’s eyes light up. “Incredible. I think I’m in love already.”
You laugh. “Should I be jealous?”
“Never,” Max winks, pulling you in for a quick kiss.
The salesman smiles indulgently. “Why don’t we step into my office to finalize the paperwork?”
“Sounds good,” Max agrees, lacing his fingers through yours as you follow the salesman.
In the sleek minimalist office, you both take a seat across from the desk as the salesman pulls up Max’s file.
“Excellent. Everything looks in order, Mr. Verstappen,” he says briskly. “If you just sign here and here, we’ll get you all set up.”
Max eagerly scrawls his signature on the documents. You watch in amusement — he reminds you of a kid on Christmas morning.
“Alright, congratulations!” The salesman stands and shakes Max’s hand. “The SF90 is all yours. We’ll have her prepped and ready for you within the hour.”
“Amazing, thanks so much,” Max grins, standing up.
You’re about to follow him out when a flash of black catches your eye. Through the office window, you spot a brand new Ferrari model on display in the showroom.
“Ooh what’s that one?” You ask curiously, gazing at the aggressive curves and styling.
The salesman glances over. “The new 812 Competizione A. It is a limited edition 599-unit production run. Just unveiled last month.”
You feel a thrill run through you as you take in the stunning hypercar. “It’s incredible. I have to have it.”
Max raises his eyebrows in surprise. “Really? You want that one too?”
You turn to the salesman decisively. “I’ll take it. My family has bought from Ferrari for years, my name should be in your client database.”
“Of course, Miss Stroll,” the salesman nods, typing rapidly into his computer. “I see you right here. Let’s start the paperwork and we’ll get the car ordered for you right away.”
You grab your purse, immediately fishing out your black Centurion Card. “Just bill it to my usual card, thanks,” you say breezily, handing it over.
You can feel Max’s stunned gaze on you but you keep your focus on the salesman, reviewing the spec sheet and customization options.
This new Ferrari is just too sexy to resist.
Within minutes, the paperwork is signed and you’ve secured the very first 812 Competizione A destined to stay in Monaco. You grin excitedly — you can’t wait to get your hands on it.
“Thank you so much, just have it delivered to my place in the Fontvieille district when it’s ready,” you tell the appreciative salesman before turning to leave.
You lace your fingers through Max’s, still smiling about your new spontaneously purchased hypercar. “Ready to take your new baby out for a drive?”
Max is quiet as you walk back to the showroom, seemingly lost in thought. He stays silent as the gleaming red SF90 Stradale is pulled around, not even cracking a smile when the salesman hands over the keys with a flourish.
It’s not until you’ve been driving for several minutes, weaving along the coastal roads overlooking the Mediterranean, that Max finally speaks.
“That was 2.13 million euros,” he states flatly. “And you just ... bought it. Without a second thought.”
You glance over, taking in the unreadable expression on his face. “I mean, yeah, it’s a beautiful model. Why not just get it?” You say casually.
Max shakes his head slowly. “I just can’t wrap my head around having that kind of money. That you can just drop over two million without thinking twice.”
You shift slightly, feeling defensive. “I’m sorry, does it make you uncomfortable? I know I grew up with a very different lifestyle ...”
“No, that’s not it at all,” Max interrupts. He pauses, gazing out at the sparkling blue sea pensively.
“It’s just … I’m not used to being with someone who’s on my level. Financially, I mean. All my previous girlfriends, I always had to take care of everything. Pay for dinner, vacations, whatever they needed.”
He turns to look at you. “But you’re different. You have as much money as me, more even. You can buy a hypercar on a whim, no problem. It’s new territory.”
You chew your lip. “I don’t want you to feel emasculated or anything. If you want to pay or take care of things ...”
Max shakes his head again, more firmly this time. “That’s just it — I don’t. I like that you’re independent. It’s really ...”
He pauses, blushing slightly. “Sexy. That’s the word. It’s sexy that you have your own money and success. I’m not used to feeling that in a relationship before.”
Your eyes widen in surprise. That was not the reaction you were expecting.
Max glances at you almost shyly. “Is that weird to say? I just mean, it’s different than what I’m used to, but in a good way. Like we’re equals, you know?”
Slowly, a smile spreads across your face. “No, not weird at all. I get what you mean.” You reach over and squeeze his hand. “This is new territory for me too. But I like discovering it together.”
Max’s face lights up with that radiant smile that melts your heart. “Me too, liefje.”
Your conversation flows easily as you cruise along the seaside, the setting sun glittering on the water. And seeing the look in his eyes when he glances at you now — equal parts love and admiration — you realize just how right it feels.
Being with someone who can match you in every way is new and different for both of you. But you have a feeling it’s the start of something beautiful.
***
The energy buzzing around the paddock is electric as you walk hand-in-hand with Max towards the Red Bull motorhome. Fans line the barriers, cheering and shouting his name. Max smiles and waves, slowing to sign autographs and snap selfies with outstretched phones.
You hang back politely as he interacts with his adoring public. You know the drill by now, having attended countless races with your dad and brother over the years. Blend into the background and let the drivers have their moment.
“Max! Can we get an autograph?” A young girl calls out eagerly, brandishing a cap and marker pen.
“Of course!” Max says graciously, letting go of your hand to walk over.
You hang back contentedly, happy to let him have his moment with his supporters. You catch snippets of their supportive comments as Max signs item after item, posing for selfies in between.
“You’re the greatest, Max!”
“That last win was epic. Get that fourth title this year!”
“We love you so much!”
You smile to yourself. Seeing how much joy Max brings to these fans makes your heart swell with pride and affection.
As you stand waiting patiently, you overhear the girl lean over to her friend and not-so-subtly whisper, “Who’s the chick with Max? She looks kinda stuck up if you ask me.”
Your smile freezes. You see the girl jerk her head rudely in your direction, glaring at you.
“I know right,” her friend agrees in a carrying whisper. “Another gold-digger who managed to sink her claws into a rich man too blind to see what she’s doing.”
You clench your jaw, stung by their spiteful words. Who do they think they are, judging you when they don’t even know you?
Max is still occupied with the other fans, oblivious. You debate whether to just ignore the rude girls. But their jealous gossiping has sparked your defiance. Why should you stay silent?
Squaring your shoulders, you turn and level a steady gaze at them. “For your information, I don’t need a rich man. I am a rich man,” you state coldly.
Their eyes widen in shock, mouths dropping open stupidly. Clearly they weren’t expecting you to confront them.
Before they can react, Max is suddenly beside you, slipping his arm around your waist.
“Whoa, everything okay here?” His gaze darts between you and the embarrassed fans.
You take a breath, ready to explain it away. But Max doesn’t give you the chance.
“You know, if anything, I’m the one who got my claws hooked into her,” he announces, lips curving into a smirk.
Now it’s your turn to gape at him in surprise. The nasty fans look completely bewildered.
“That’s right ladies, I’m just a kept man,” Max continues lightly. “Her arm candy. A sugar baby, if you will.”
He pretends to examine his nails arrogantly and you have to stifle a shocked laugh. Is he actually joking about being your boy toy right now?
Max leans in conspiratorially. “Between you and me, dating a Stroll has done wonders for my bank account. I mean have you seen the new and improved garage decor?”
You smother your grin behind your hand as he prattles on, winking at you.
“So don’t worry about Y/N here, she can buy and sell me twice over.” Max presses a smacking kiss to your cheek. “Isn’t that right, schatje?”
Finally you can’t hold back your laughter anymore. Max joins in and the fans stare, unsure how to react.
“Come on sugar mama, we’ve got a race to win,” Max says breezily, steering you away.
Once safely inside the garage, you turn to him incredulously. “What was that all about?”
Max shrugs, his expression sobering. “I heard what they said. Just wanted to shut them up and defend my girl.”
Your heart melts. Standing on your tiptoes, you kiss him soundly. “My hero. Thank you.”
Max still looks bothered. “You shouldn’t have to deal with stupid gossip. Especially not lies about you using me.”
You slip your arms around his neck persuasively. “It usually doesn’t get to me. Let the jealous haters talk. We know the truth.”
He sighs, gently moving a strand of hair from your face. “I just hate anyone thinking badly of you. You deserve the world.”
Touched by his sincerity, you pull him down into a soft kiss. When you finally draw apart, an idea pops into your head.
“Although ...” you begin thoughtfully, “Maybe we should lean into it.”
Max looks confused. “What do you mean?”
You grin mischievously. “You’re my hot trophy boyfriend. I need to show you off and treat you right.”
Comprehension dawns on Max’s face and he barks out a laugh. “Well I won’t say no to being spoiled.”
He winks roguishly and you dissolve into giggles. The stupid gossipers don’t know anything. You and Max are just perfect together.
For the rest of the weekend, you shamelessly flaunt your new role as Max’s “sugar mommy.” At every opportunity, you shower him with over-the-top gifts and PDA in front of the other drivers and team members.
Designer watches, bouquets of flowers, bottles of decadent gin for his favorite drink — you deliver them all publicly to Max along with cooed compliments and kisses. You can see the amusement hidden behind his mock protests at being “objectified.”
The other drivers are endlessly entertained. Daniel teases Max about latching onto an heiress, while Charles jokingly asks if you have a sister he can date.
By the time Max wins on Sunday, cementing his spot at the top of the championship, the silly gossip from earlier in the weekend is long forgotten.
As you snuggle together on the flight home from the race, you turn to Max curiously. “So, how does it feel being a kept man?”
He pretends to consider it deeply. “Hmm, tough to say. The gifts and pampering were nice ...”
You swat his chest indignantly and he laughs.
“Kidding, kidding,” he assures, pulling you tighter against him. “Obviously I love you for you, not your money, schatje.”
His voice softens. “Thank you for this weekend. I know the gossip bothered you, even if you didn’t show it. I’m lucky to have you by my side.”
You tilt your face up to meet his lips, kissing him tenderly. No more words are needed. Being together says it all.
***
The roar of the crowd surrounds you as you step onto the red carpet on Max’s arm, cameras flashing wildly. He gives your hand a reassuring squeeze and leans in close.
“You ready for this, liefje?”
You take a deep breath and nod, pasting on a smile. “Ready.”
This is your big formal debut — attending your first FIA Prize Giving Ceremony as Max’s girlfriend. And with him just winning his fourth World Championship, all eyes are sure to be on you both tonight.
You try to ignore the butterflies in your stomach as you begin the walk down the carpet, waving politely to the fans shouting Max’s name. He looks completely at ease, his fourth-straight title boosting his confidence even higher.
You, on the other hand, feel like you might trip over your gown at any moment under the blinding spotlights. But you keep your chin high, channeling the poise that’s been drilled into you since girlhood.
Perks of growing up in high society — you know how to fake it on a red carpet.
About halfway down, an interviewer steps forward, microphone in hand. “Max Verstappen! Congratulations on your fourth championship. How are you feeling tonight?”
Max smiles easily. “Thank you, it feels amazing. It was a great battle all season long so this one feels very satisfying.”
The reporter nods, then turns her attention to you. “And who is this lovely lady accompanying you tonight?”
“This is my girlfriend, Y/N,” Max introduces you proudly.
“Y/N, you look absolutely stunning tonight, if you don’t mind me saying,” the interviewer gushes. “That gown is exquisite!”
You relax slightly, warming to her friendly tone. “Thank you so much!” You smile.
“In fact, both of your outfits are fabulous,” she continues. “Who are you wearing tonight?”
Max’s face lights up. He squeezes your hand excitedly. “Funny you should ask — we’re both wearing custom Y/N Stroll originals!”
You have to resist the urge to giggle at the unconcealed pride in his voice.
The interviewer’s eyes widen. “No way, you designed these yourselves?”
You nod, enjoying her reaction. “I did, yeah. Fashion design is a bit of a hobby of mine.”
“A hobby she’s amazing at,” Max interjects adoringly. “She could have her own luxury brand if she wanted. I feel so honored to wear her work.”
You blush at his high praise. “Oh Max, stop. But thank you, that’s so sweet.”
The reporter seems thrilled at this exclusive scoop. “Incredible! It looks like you have some serious talent, Y/N. Any plans to pursue that more seriously?”
You hesitate briefly. Your father has been gently nudging you to take over his fashion business when he retires. But that’s still in the future ...
You decide to give a lighthearted answer. “We’ll see! Fashion does run in my family so it’s always a possibility.” You finish with a coy smile.
“How wonderful! We’ll be keeping an eye out for Y/N Stroll designs in the future then,” the reporter concludes enthusiastically.
You grin and wave as she lets you continue down the carpet, Max’s arm securely around your waist.
“See, that wasn’t so bad was it?” He murmurs in your ear.
“Not at all,” you admit. “I might get used to this whole red carpet thing after all.”
Max winks. “Stick with me and you’ll be a pro in no time.”
Your heart flutters happily. Being by his side just feels so right.
Inside the lavish venue, you’re shown to your table near the front with the other top drivers and their partners. Max pulls out your chair politely before sitting down beside you.
You chat with the other girls at the table, fellow WAGs you’ve gotten to know over the course of the season. They gush over the dress you designed, making you promise to create something for them too.
Soon, the lights dim and the ceremony begins. You clap loudly as Max wins Driver of the Year, bursting with pride for your champion.
Finally, the moment comes for the big one. The announcer begins the buildup, recapping the season’s epic title battle between Max and his closest rival.
"… And in the end, one man emerged victorious for the fourth time in his young but dazzling career,” the announcer concludes. “Formula 1 World Driver’s Champion ... Max Verstappen!”
The room explodes into thunderous applause as Max squeezes your hand and makes his way up to the stage, beaming. You watch with tears in your eyes as he accepts the trophy, looking so handsome and accomplished.
After the ceremony finishes, Max makes his way back to you, trophy in hand. You throw your arms around him. “I’m so proud of you!”
He hugs you tight, then pulls back, his expression earnest. “I couldn’t have done it without your support this season. Having you by my side means everything to me.”
Your heart swells and you kiss him tenderly. “You deserve this so much. And nothing makes me happier than being with you.”
Max’s eyes shine. “I love you, Y/N.”
“I love you too, Max.”
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nariism · 8 months
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ೃ⁀➷ MY LOVE, MINE ALL MINE ★
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a/n: fluff!! neuvillette being a touch starved loser (affectionate) + lots of terms of endearment. happy belated neuvillette day! may all neuvillette wanters be neuvillette havers ≧◡≦
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Neuvillette can't stand coming home if not into your arms.
The deafening silence of a sleeping home drives him mad. It used to be welcomed after his terribly loud days. Now only serves to remind him of the millennium he spent alone, of the heartbreak he had to endure with no one to hold him, and of the growing emptiness within his heart long before he knew you.
It's unlike him to come home so late, but duty calls and as the Iudex of Fontaine he must go wherever summoned.
For days he has come home well into the latest hours of the night, sliding off his shoes in the darkness of the hall and allowing the silence to swallow him up whole. Five unbearably long days of missing your smile greeting him at the door, hands all over his face and squeezing his cheeks until he nudges them away in lieu of kissing you hello.
He expects tonight to be the same. It's so late that there was not a single soul wandering the streets of the city, no one awake to witness the very tired, very cranky Chief Justice.
You always find a way to defy his expectations.
The hall is quiet when he cracks open the front door. Crushing loneliness swells in his chest and sinks into the pit of his stomach when he realizes that you must have gone to bed long ago, as anyone sane would do. But then there's a click, followed by a small flame dancing in the dark.
You ignite an array of candles one by one, each additional glow illuminating your beautiful face in warm light. Neuvillette can't stop the hitching of his breath, nor the confusion knitted through his brows.
"What are you doing awake?"
You know he doesn't mean to scold you. Soft laughter fills his ears as you saunter over to him slowly. Realization crashes down on him as you approach, allowing him to see closer what has kept you up.
"Happy birthday, my love."
It's so late that midnight passed hours ago. He hadn't even realized amongst all the chaos of his work that the 17th had come and gone, making way for his birthday.
Only you would remember. It was a talent you had, memorizing every detail about him that sometimes even he lost track of.
("Neuvillette, dear, I picked up some dark roast on the way home today." He didn't even realize he had run out.
"Welcome home, I made ragout!" He wasn't aware he was craving it until you brought it up.
"Do you want this?" It's the last cookie in the bag, saved especially for him because you know it's from his favourite bakery in town.)
He leans in and blows out his candles, eyes never leaving yours as he blinks at you slowly. You look so beautiful even now, in the dimly moonlit hall. Darkness envelops your bodies again and yet he never tears his gaze away. Not even for a moment.
"Now put the cake down, please."
"Hm?" Your head tilts, clearly confused by his request.
"So I can hold you," he quickly explains, fingers itching at his sides because of how much he aches to hug you.
You gently set the cake down on the entrance table before you get scooped into a warm embrace, pressed snuggly to his chest as he memorizes the outline of your body against his once more.
"I've missed you, my dear," he says, face burrowed into the crook of your neck.
"It's only been a couple days," you laugh, and then remind him: "I see you every day at lunch."
"No, this is different." He pulls away slightly, forehead pressed against yours as he looks into your eyes. There's something in there— vulnerability and love all mixed into a beautiful purple harmony. "I miss coming home into your arms after long days," he admits.
"Oh, love," you breathe, reaching up to cup his face the way he's so used to. "Things will settle down again soon."
His eyes close as he savours your presence, soaking up all the affection you're giving him in his moment of weakness. You've always spoiled him.
"I suppose so," he agrees, a smile finally settling on his lips. Your thumb runs along it, tracing the curve of his happiness. There's a beat of silence before you open your mouth again.
"What did you wish for?" You ask curiously, voice growing quieter as you lean in to kiss him. And the answer he gives comes naturally.
Neuvillette has always wished for things he read about in novels; imaginary promises of treasure and desire and fame, sealed with the wispy smoke of blown out birthday candles. He isn't even sure if he has ever actually wanted any of those. But as he looks at you, with the slow beating of his heart and the brushing of your lips against him, he can't think of a single thing he could want more than this.
"I did not wish for anything," he tells you honestly, giving your waist a squeeze. "I already have everything I could ever want."
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© ALABOADOA 2023 — please do not translate or post my works to other platforms.
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joeloverture · 4 months
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morning cardio | dbf!j.m. x f!reader
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masterlist | updates blog pairing: dbf!neighbor!joel miller x f!reader summary: [no outbreak] your neighbor and dad's longtime buddy catches you sneaking back home after an underwhelming hook-up. you want more — he provides. warnings: (18+ mdni) dbf!neighbor!joel, age gap (23/50), reader has a bad relationship with her father, reader's father is overly strict, reader hooks up with an oc, dirty talk, soft!dom joel, degradation, praise, thigh riding, 1 spank, titty slapping, daddy kink, exhibitionism but nobody sees, almost caught, heavy petting, misogyny for sexiness that joel doesn't actually believe in since he's a sweetheart [no use of y/n] word count: 3.7k a/n: watch me almost exclusively post dbf joel. watch me. also, mind the tags, they've changed slightly since i posted the teaser. this was supposed to be a series. this is no longer the case bc i'm indecisive. sorry.
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Mistake number one: your eyes are crusted shut with the mascara you’d forgotten to wipe off.
Mistake number two: the bed you wake up in is not your own.
Mistake number three: sleeping with your neighbor.
Rubbing your mascara-sealed eyes, you blink yourself into consciousness and instantly regret it. There’s a moment of stillness, time stretching as you take in the room underneath the swelling orange sunlight. The window is cracked just enough to give you a glimpse at the world outside — birds chirping, sprinklers spritzing, cars crunching gravel as they pull out of the driveway. Surrounding the narrow, rumpled bed is a graveyard of orphaned socks. A box fan whirrs in the corner. The room had felt much cleaner past midnight when it was only the yellowed street lamp outside shining through the window. Then you spot the digital clock on the cluttered bedside table reads 6:10, ten minutes later than you’d wanted to be awake for, and time returns to its regular pace.
Your heart kicks awake in your chest, veins going cold. You kick the sheets off of your sweaty body, roll out of bed, and stumble two steps before planting your feet on the carpet below. Even that isn’t enough to stir your hookup. Dylan Andrews.
It’d seemed like a good enough idea at the time. Both of you were home for spring break. Both of you had flirted at the block party with each other. He was only decent-looking and mediocre with his hands, but you needed a break from spending another night in your childhood bedroom. What better way to do it than with a dick appointment?
Again. It’d seemed like a good enough idea at the time. Sneaking out underneath the nose of your strict, tough-as-nails dad was the easy part. Sneaking back in? Less easy. And to make matters worse, you were already ten minutes behind.
Shit.
You tiptoe across the room, naked as the day you were born, and stuff your underappreciated lingerie into your backpack. Without even putting your panties or bra on, you hop into your shorts and wrestle with your hoodie. By the time you’re out of Dylan’s room, it’s 6:12.
The difference between your dad and Dylan’s mom? She doesn’t give a shit what side of town Dylan wakes up on or how much alcohol is sloshing around in his system as long as he’s safe. You’re not the first girl to do the walk of shame out of Ms. Andrews' generic McMansion house, and you’re far from the last.
She’s downstairs in front of the coffee maker, still wearing her pajamas and doing a Dollar General crossword when you slip past her kitchen unnoticed. The door clangs shut behind you, and you figure she must see you walking down the cul-de-sac.
Your dad always leaves for work at 6:45 after a freezing cold shower and a steaming cup of black coffee for balance. You can only hope his shower ran a little late and that he isn’t at the dining room table already. Cramming two steps into one, you continue with your beeline down the awakening street.
You’re followed home by the mailboxes and flower beds, the pebbles you kick with every step. You’re almost to the property line, prepared to make a mad dash to your front door when you hear the faint call of your name. You skid to a stop, and turn to face the source: the craftsman-style house next door.
And there he is – Joel Miller, sitting on one of the cushioned chairs of his front porch in nothing but his sleep shorts and a t-shirt, legs spread as wide as the chair can accommodate. There’s a smug, knowing look on his face, one that says I’ve caught you. See how you can get out of this.
It’s been a long time since you’ve been face to face with Joel — Mr. Miller. You’d think you’d see him more often, with him being your dad’s buddy and your neighbor, but it’s been since summer. You’re sure he must be having the time of his life by joining your just got laid parade.
“You’re up awful early,” he calls, beckoning you up the driveway with a come-hither movement of his fingers. Leaving your dignity at the curb, you pad up the yard to his porch, climbing one of the stairs to lean against the gutter that feeds into his shrubbery. Pollen and moss is scattered across the wooden deck, surrounding a package that he hasn’t bothered to pick up yet. His guitar is off to the side, propped up against the doorway of the house. You wonder if he’d been playing when he’d seen you walking by.
Joel’s covered for you before, briefly and sparingly. Taken the fall for the half-empty bottle of fireball in your dresser even though he’d never go within ten feet of that shit, blamed it on himself for accidentally leaving it behind after fixing a wheel that had jumped off track for you. Even though your dad had chewed him out for drinking on the job, he’d still managed to sneak it back to you with the wise words of hiding it in a sock next time. You’d been two months past your twenty-first when that had happened, and maybe Joel had pitied you after realizing how authoritarian his friend was.
You aren’t as sure if he’ll pity you now.
“Needed some fresh air,” you defend lamely, hands hanging limp by your sides.
“Needed some cock?” he corrects, and his bluntness makes you choke. He seems relaxed for the words that just came out of his mouth, fingers drumming on his impossibly large thighs, a playful smirk resting on his lips.
You sputter, “No! Jesus, what the hell–”
“I got eyes, hun. Saw you leave that Andrews kid’s place. Clearly he didn’t stick it to ya that good if you’re still walkin’ steady,” he comments. His head tilts.
“Joel,” you hiss, eyes flitting to your dad’s house next door. He seems to read your mind, his smirk widening.
“Wonder what your pops would think. Bet I have a pretty good idea. His little angel, sneakin’ around and whorin’ herself out.” He clicks his tongue at you. “A damn shame.”
Heat spools low in your stomach and down to your unsatisfied center. You wish you’d worn darker colored shorts instead of the flimsy gray things you have on. There’s no barrier of your panties to stop yourself from leaking all over them, and with the way Joel’s looking at you, eyes dark and sly, you’re wishing there was.
“Can’t even imagine what you’re gettin’ up to at that college ‘a yours. Bet you had five guys inside of ya all at once, and I sure ain’t talkin’ about burgers, hun.” He lounges back in his chair, watching you.
You feel yourself gush. Heat burns in your thighs, and they rub together on instinct, seeking to extinguish that brimming ache between your legs. You bunch your hands in the fabric of your sweatshirt and can’t stop yourself from squirming underneath his gaze. It’s not like you’ve never thought about this, this with him of all people when you’re underneath your covers and your hand finds the warm junction between your thighs. Always unattainable. Always just out of reach.
You whisper again, “Joel,” but this time, it comes out as more of a moan. Humiliation warms your cheeks and chest, forming a different kind of pit in your stomach.
“Hmmmm?” Joel hums at you with a raised brow. He’s casual, indifferent, almost. But then his eyes flicker up and down, stopping at the wet patch smeared across the front of your shorts, the way your thighs press tight, tensing before letting go. “Ah. A little slut shamin’ gets you all riled up, hun?” That tears a whimper from you. He does that stupid come hither motion again, and like a lost dog, you listen. Standing in front of him, you feel completely, utterly exposed.
He adjusts himself in his chair, and you swallow the building lump in your throat when you see his bulge hardening. It sends another zap of heat to your core, and then another, more surprised one when his hand goes up to grab at your tit. Your breath catches as he thumbs one of your hardened nipples. A triumphant noise echoes out of him. “Braless, too?” His other hand goes down to your shorts, playing with the waistband. “Prancin’ around in these short, skimpy things, too. Practically giving the whole neighborhood a free peep show.”
His hand slides lower. Lower. Pans over to the crease of your thigh and then his thumb is planting over your clit, rubbing only once before he pulls away. “Messy pussy. Bet you stained the guys sheets.”
You’re quiet, staring at him, his wicked fucking expression, those hands that look like sin itself. You bite the inside of your cheek.
“Ah. Poor baby. All this effort and you didn’t even get to come.” He just looks at you. Unmoving. Not doing a single damn thing to get you there.
“Please, Joel,” you whisper, embarrassed by the gritty need already embedded into your voice when he’s hardly even touched you.
And he’s still wearing that wolfish look, that tainted-with-intention gleam in his eyes that tells you he knows exactly what you do want when he asks, “What? What do you want?” He licks his lips, a fleeting moment.
You look over your shoulder, at the rising street. Anyone could have their windows cracked. Anyone could hear you confess on this porch. Still, you murmur, “I… I want you to make me come, Joel.” Your voice shivers a little bit along with the stroke of wind that wisps against the backs of your thighs.
His brows raise together, now. His head tips forward. “What was that? A little louder. You know, my ears really ain’t the sharpest these days…”
Fucking bastard.
“I want,” you say again, fighting to stop your voice from wavering, to keep it not too loud but not too quiet. “you to make me come.”
Joel sucks on his teeth for a second. “Ohhh. Now I don’t think that’s really fair, hun.” He gives you a mockingly sad look.
“Why?” you ask, and you know you sound as whiny as a petulant child. But he’d been correct earlier. You put in all of this effort, sneaking out for a thrilling night that had turned into something more like two sweaty bodies moving together and only one of them feeling good from it. You want to feel good. You’re tired of looking at the right and the wrong. Joel’s sitting in front of you, his thumb still smelling like your arousal; that’s what’s right.
“You’re out here breakin’ all the rules. Shouldn’t be rewarding you for that, sweetheart. Besides, it’s a little fucked up, dontcha think? Makin’ you come all over me while your pops, my buddy, is none the wiser gettin’ ready for work next door?” His vulgarity only weakens you even more, pussy clenching and begging to be filled. You’re about to protest again when he cuts in, “But that doesn’t mean I can’t help ya out.”
Your heart pedals in your chest, eager and wanting. But Joel, instead of getting up and elbowing you inside like you expect, stays right where he is. He pats one of his splayed thighs, the grin on his face only widening. Your face contorts. Joel hears your question before you ask.
“What? Never humped someone’s leg before? With how much of a bitch in heat you’re actin’ right now, I’m surprised.” You can feel the shock on your face plain as day. Joel jerks his head down to his thigh, egging you on. “Better hurry up if you want my help, sweetheart. Pretty sure your dad’s about to get goin’, and I sure don’t have all day, either.”
The rapidly shrinking part of yourself that isn’t consumed with desire tells you to take a step back. That anyone, God forbid, even the Adlers across the street could witness this. Talk about a free peep show.
You think of the alternative: sneaking back into your house with a hope and a prayer that your dad won’t find you, backpack over your shoulder and shoes on, as you climb the stairs back to your bedroom. Open up your Joel-advised dresser drawer of things your dad says you shouldn’t have and pull out your vibrator. Do the same old hassle of a routine, desperately trying to make yourself come. Reach an unfulfilling peak.
Or… take what Joel’s offering you. Risks and all.
You take a tentative step forward, glaring at Joel when he chuckles because of your hesitance, and plop yourself down on his thigh. The pressure against your clit immediately pulls a whimper from you. His big hands fix themselves on your hips, holding tight, but not too tight as to hold you captive against him. There’s still the faint existence of the Joel you’ve always known, considerate and sweet and all southern gentleman, that exists behind the guise of his dominance. 
You nestle your head into the crook of his neck, breathing heavy against him as you get a slow start to grinding your hips on his thigh. Although your movements are tentative, uncertain in nature, your head is already going fuzzy.
“Bet you’re only this wet cause that boy already put a new load in your dishwasher.” You scoff at him in disbelief — both at how much more wet it gets you, and how foul his words are. He chooses then to jerk you forward by the hips. You cry out as your pussy drags along the thick expanse of his thigh, clit catching on the bunched up fabric of your rumpled shorts.
“Zip it, you fuckin’ hussy. Ain’t a damn soul in this neighborhood that wants to wake up to you sobbin’ while gettin’ off on this thigh.” One of his hands drifts back to squeeze at the flesh of your ass. You hear the spank before you feel it, a sting that echoes and sticks right between your legs. He’s effortlessly strung a barbed wire of humiliation around your body. The lack of power makes your thighs clamp down around his, and you can’t tell if you crave more of it or despise it.
Unable to decide which, you loudly, exaggeratedly moan into his ear, still rocking down on his lap. It resounds through the neighborhood, the springboard roofs ricocheting you coquettish noises down the street and through the flowerbeds. A spooked crow lifts off of the power lines behind you, and you hear it squawk as its wings beat and carry it away.
Joel cocks his head at you, brow raised. “So it’s not just your legs that have a problem stayin’ shut. It’s your nasty mouth, too.” His hands migrate up your sides to your tits, which jostle with every flighty movement across his thigh. Before you know what he’s doing, he tweezes at your nipples in a way that makes you melt into him, forehead falling flat against his neck. And then he lands a hard smack across your chest, pleasure with a bite. Your hips jolt. “Behave for daddy before I make you walk next door draggin’ a snail trail behind ya.”
You know he doesn’t mean your real dad. A new rush of heat settles in your stomach, tightening your cunt from an ache to an insatiable thrumming that only Joel can solve. “Fuck,” you almost shout, but end up muffling into his skin with an open-mouthed kiss. He sighs, adjusting under you. The change in angle on your clit makes you whimper, especially when you feel his hardened length smushed against the outside of your thigh.
Your hand goes down to grip it, to participate in the push and pull, the cat and mouse, but he shakes his head, pulling it out of the way. He holds you by the small of your back, urging you to keep rubbing on him. “You’re lucky I’m even givin’ you my thigh,” he spits. “Ain’t gonna let you play chutes and ladders tryna make me come when I know damn well where that hand was last night.”
“Daddy,” you pout at him, lower lip jutting out.
He only shakes his head. “Don’t start.”
Whining in agitation, you manage to school yourself into behaving like he’d told you to. Every grind of your hips welcomes pleasure, beckons it, activates the porch light inside of you that invites it inside. You go limp against Joel as he guides you back and forth, and even limper when he tightens the muscle underneath your soaking core. Your hands anchor themselves on his broad shoulders, nails carving into his skin through the flimsy material of his shirt. He hisses underneath you, a break in his seemingly titanium resolve. You feel yourself getting closer, heat wreathing around your stomach, cunt clenching.
In your house, the foyer light flickers on.
Your hips stall over Joel’s as you see your dad’s backlit silhouette moving around in the foyer. Likely sliding on his shoes, patting his pockets for his wallet and his work phone…. You have two minutes at best.
Joel’s eyes follow your distracted line of vision. His amused chuckle warms the back of your neck. “Oughta hurry up if you don’t wanna get caught. Your old man would be in for a rude awakening, headin’ to work and finding his precious little girl fuckin’ my leg like a whore,” he murmurs.
He bounces his leg underneath you, and you bite back the needy cry that threatens to slip out. It feels so good, too good for you to think about anything other than the haze of arousal and pleasure that hovers over your head like a perpetual fog. You return to grinding down on him, hips pumping with a greater, renewed speed. “Attagirl,” Joel croons at you, and the hand at the small of your back presses harder, pushing you up and down his thigh.
Short, strained breaths of yours meet the morning air, eyes pinned on the rectangular window. It’s a golden-washed reminder of how wrong this is. Your dad would blow a gasket, see red, breathe fire at you if he knew exactly what was happening just a few feet away from his front yard.
But you forget all about that when Joel’s calloused fingers cup your chin, nudging you to look at him. His eyes are all pupil, darkened with something like starvation, something like want. “Don’t look at him. Look at me,” he coaxes, and he bounces his thigh again.
You’re close, you can feel it. He can feel it, too, in the way that your thighs fasten around his, your cunt rocking on him as your fervor makes the whole front porch shake and shudder. Tossing your hips back and forth, you wanted it, but now? Now you need it. Your stomach tightens, your legs shivering below you as your cunt gushes all over both of your shorts. “That’s it, baby, come on me like you were beggin’ to. ‘S alright, nice and easy for daddy, mhm?” He tenses his thigh one final time, and you lurch over that edge. “Gooood girl,” he hums as your cunt flutters against his leg. “You’re a daredevil, aren’t you?” he asks, jerking his head toward your house.
You figure you must be, after what you just did.
You’d planned on staying there, riding it out and trembling against his warm chest. But the garage cranks open. You jolt off of Joel’s lap, damn near teleporting across the porch with how fast you move. Joel smirks at you, crossing his unfucked leg over his freshly fucked one, where you’d rubbed your cum all over his skin until it’d glistened. The sight warms your stomach all over again, but it doesn’t last – nerves spasm in your ribcage as your dad ducks out into the driveway.
You fumble with your shorts, pulling them down and crossing your hands in front of the obvious stain on the gray fabric. Your dad squints across the yard, cupping a hand over his eyes. “Miller?” He calls your name shortly after, and you straighten. “You’re up early, kiddo.”
You open your mouth, on the precipice of a lie that you know won’t be good. It’ll come out unsteady, dishonest, and uneven. 
Joel points at the package at the foot of his doorstep. “My toolbox got sent to yours,” he explains. “Damn postal. ‘Bout as good as the Boston Post Road these days. But your kid’s got me covered. Raised her right.”
For the second time, Joel Miller covers for you. You have no idea where this leaves you, standing under your dad’s scrutinizing gaze. With your cum cooling and sticking to your folds the same way it’s cooling and sticking to his leg, Joel knows your secret. And he’s keeping it.
Your dad only gives a shallow nod, looking between the two of you. “Well,” he hooks a hand back at his truck. “I gotta head off to work.” He shifts on his feet, this time pointing to you. “And you head back inside, kiddo. Too early for you to be up and movin’.” Of course it is.
You stare at the ground, the pollen and stray leaves below your feet. Finally, you settle on a nod. Shallow and halfhearted, much like his. Your dad, satisfied, retreats back into the garage. You hear the truck engine come to life.
“You heard the man,” Joel says. You tighten your fists, moving to step away, but the way Joel’s eyes glimmer has you loitering. He lowers his voice. “See you soon, daredevil.”
That damned nickname. “How do you know I’ll be back?” you retort under your breath.
He shrugs. “I’m sure there’ll be more… ‘packages’.”
You blame the heat in your body on the rising sun, sweat clinging to the back of your neck as you plod off through the front yard. There’s only one thought in your head as your dad pulls out and you close the garage. Mr. Miller can’t happen again.
Mistake number four: thinking you’re telling the truth.
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alltheirdamn · 1 month
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DECLINED | Mechanic!Joel x f!reader
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*The Bet*
Summary: Joel makes you a bet during a night out. Rating: 18+ Explicit Word Count: 3k Warnings: Pre-outbreak AU, mechanic!joel, established relationship, mentions of alcohol, banter, teasing, semi-public sex, unprotected piv sex, oral (f! receiving), edging, ROUGH sex, squirting, hair pulling, choking, cum eating, facial, light spanking, light face slapping, heavy kissing, explicit language, pet names (darlin', cowboy, babydoll), brat taming (kinda?) A/N: This is just pure FILTH. Eat it up, kids, I know you love it.
Masterlist | Ko-Fi
Friday nights always meant date night with Joel. With Tommy babysitting Sarah and the work day done for you both, he insisted on taking you to his favorite bar on the outskirts of town. You were looking forward to a night alone, especially when you had a surprise up your sleeve. Earlier in the week, you came across a boutique in downtown Austin that sold very…niche t-shirts…and couldn’t help buying one. Putting the finishing touches on your makeup, you stepped back and admired your outfit. You had on the tiniest pair of cut-off denim shorts hugging your ass, a pair of worn black cowboy boots, and a fitted tank top with Cowboy Pillows written across your chest. It was perfect, and you knew it would drive Joel crazy. 
Joel stopped dead in his tracks when you came waltzing out of the house and toward his truck; the hand holding open the passenger door tightened until his knuckles turned white. 
Staring you down with a fire lit behind his big puppy dog eyes, Joel shook his head in protest.
“Absolutely the fuck not, babydoll,” he swore. “Take that pretty ass back inside and change.”
You stood before the truck with your arms crossed and the biggest pout forming on your lips. 
“Did you even read my shirt, cowboy?” You asked, moving your arms to reveal the words stretched over your breasts. 
“It’s very cute, darlin’, but you ain’t goin’ out like that,” Joel grumbled. 
“Why?” You frowned. 
“I ain’t tryna get arrested tonight. ‘Cause if one man lay eyes on those perky tits, I’m killin’ them.”
You strode toward him, pressing your body against his. His hands found their usual spot over the swell of your ass, his fingers prodding into the supple flesh hidden under the denim. You hummed as his mouth dipped to your ear, his teeth grazing over the shell as his voice dropped low. 
“Why don’t we just stay in?” He breathed. “Wanna take you right back in the house and fuck you ‘til you can’t walk.”
“You promised me a night out, Joel,” you whined. 
He made his way down your neck, peppering you with open-mouthed kisses before responding to your demands.
“Fine,” he muttered against your skin. “Get your sexy ass in the fuckin’ truck, and let’s go.”
He released you and climbed into the truck with a mischievous grin. Joel quickly pulled you across the bench, tucking you into his side as he pulled out of the driveway and toward the bar. You brushed your hand over Joel’s thigh, your fingers creeping up to the zipper of his jeans. He shifted in the seat, spreading his legs a little wider to welcome more of your touch. 
“You’re gonna get yourself in trouble, babydoll,” he warned. 
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you replied innocently. 
His hand shot out before you could drag his zipper down, bringing your fingers up to his mouth to place gentle kisses along each digit. 
“I’ll make you a bet,” he smirked, turning his head to look at you.
“What kind of bet?”
“No touchin’ each other tonight. The first person to do it loses.”
A giggle bubbled out of you as you considered his offer. Knowing Joel, he’d lose before you stepped into the bar. The idea of teasing him all night already had your thighs clenching tight, the friction of the denim against your aching clit nearly too painful to bear.
“What happens to the loser?” You asked.
“Loser gets to do whatever the other one wants.”
The truck slowed to a stop as the streetlight turned red, and you moved closer to reel him in for a deep kiss. If this bet was going to happen, you wanted all the attention before you set out to win the bet. Joel’s tongue brushed over your lips, coaxing your mouth open wider and deepening the kiss. You moaned into his mouth, tangling your hands in his hair to hold him closer. 
“You’re on, cowboy,” you grinned, pulling away as the light turned green. “Hope you’re ready to lose.”
“We’ll see ‘bout that, darlin'.”
The bar was mildly crowded for a Friday night. Most of the patrons were older men sulking around or flirting with the bartenders. Soft country music floated out of the jukebox in the corner, and you found yourself swaying your hips to the melody. Joel watched you as you danced, his eyes never leaving your body unless he caught wind of another man admiring you from afar. You laughed each time he scowled at them and upped the movement of your hips just to get a rise out of him. Watching him try to hold back from touching you was cute, his hand nearly crushing the beer he was nursing. 
After your third drink, the tipsy feeling started to settle in, and self-restraint was slowly phasing out of your body. Joel noticed the shift in your mood as you perched yourself on a barstool. You tried to hide the way you clenched your thighs, chasing the friction of the denim rubbing against your aching clit. Leaning in as close as he could, Joel lowered his head and chuckled. 
“Doin’ okay, babydoll?” He whispered in your ear, his mouth a breath away from your neck.
You shivered at the phantom touch; he was so close, yet not close enough. 
“Stop it,” you exhaled. “You’re not playing fair.”
“Not playin’ fair?” He questioned. “You ain’t been playin’ fair since you walked out the damn house.”
“Aw, poor baby,” you feigned sympathy. “Am I driving you crazy with my lil’ outfit?”
“You have no fuckin’ idea, darlin’.”
Scootching off the barstool, you tilted your head toward the vacant pool table. Joel’s eyes followed the motion, raising his brow at your silent invitation.
“Y’wanna play?” He asked. “Hope you’re ready to lose, darlin’.”
“You talk a big game, cowboy. You’re on.”
You grabbed a cue stick and waited for Joel to rack the balls and center them on the green velvet table. He grabbed his own stick and gestured to you to start. 
“All you, babydoll. Let’s see it.”
You rounded the table and leaned over to line your stick with the cue ball. Inhaling on the pull of your stick, you exhaled and drove it into the cue. The sound of the resin balls breaking shattered the music in the background, their triangle formation scattering across the table. You managed to sink two striped balls into the left corner pocket and rose to assess the damage. Joel stared at you, impressed, nodding as he lined up his stick with the cue. 
“Y’got stripes, babydoll. Solid’s are mine,” he mutters, his eyes trained on the ball. 
You watched, mesmerized, as Joel’s shoulder muscles moved fluidly with each extension of his arm. With a strong drive of the stick, Joel sunk the four ball into the right-center pocket. Giving you a cocky grin, he rounded the table again, this time directly facing you. He stared up at you, his eyes dark under the furrow of his brows. You bent over the table's edge, propping your face onto your hands and shimming your shoulders slightly. Joel’s eyes snapped up to your chest, fixated on the way your breasts pushed together.
“Not fair,” he gritted before sending his stick into the cue ball. 
The ball scratched on the table, missing the solid he aimed for. You smirked at him, sticking your tongue out as you skipped around the table to settle into position against the table. You eyed Joel as he moved to stand behind you, and you rewarded him with pushing your ass out further. Giving your hips a little wiggle, you sent a forceful shot into the cue, sinking the nine ball and ricocheting it against the twelve ball, sending it into the right corner pocket. 
“Damn,” Joel mumbled, tracking your body as you lined up for your third turn. 
“Didn’t think I was good, huh?” You laughed. 
“You’re good at everythin’, darlin’.”
The dip in his voice vibrated up your body as you pressed your legs against the table to line up for the next stroke. Joel leaned his hip against the corner of the table, folding his arms as he watched you aim your stick at the cue. 
“C’mon, babydoll,” he whispered, drawing your focus away from the shot and causing the cue ball to sink into the pocket rather than the fifteen ball you were gunning toward. 
“You play dirty,” you grumbled. 
Joel crowded you, his body inches from yours. You arched into the distance between your bodies, barely keeping your chest from brushing his. 
“I bet those panties are already soaked, huh?” Joel teased.
You gave him an innocent smile, ready to deliver the final blow to his restraint. Rising onto your toes, you kept your mouth close to his ear. 
“They would be if I were wearing any, cowboy.”
You pulled back to see Joel’s nostrils flaring, his eyes roaming down your body and back up. 
“Bathroom. Now.” He demanded. 
“But we’re still playing,” you whined, gesturing to the pool table. 
Joel’s hand shot out to your waist, dragging you to his body. 
“Fuck the game. Need you in that bathroom now so I can fuck that sassiness outta you,” he growled. 
“I’m not sassin’ you, cowboy. You’re just a sore loser,” you taunted. 
“I ain’t gonna ask again, babydoll. You either walk to the bathroom right now, or I fuck you on that pool table in front of everyone.”
“Maybe I want a crowd,” you shrugged with a coy grin. “Bend me over right here, cowboy. Show them who’s yours.”
“Bet you’d like that, huh? Have all them eyes on you while you scream my name and soak the table. Y’wanna show everyone how good y’take my cock?”
“Do it,” you smiled. 
Joel’s hand traveled down your ass, squeezing it hard enough to make you yelp before smacking it hard. A few heads turned at the sound, their wandering eyes scrutinizing you and Joel. Even though Joel could be all talk, you knew he wouldn’t actually fuck you in front of everyone, not when he was the most protective and selfish man there was. 
You were too turned on to fight it now. Turning toward the bathroom, you glanced over your shoulder and smiled as Joel watched you walk to the dimly lit hallway of the bar. You didn’t have the care to notice heads turning to stare at you as you passed, the excitement too strong as it coursed through your veins. You barely had a hand on the door when you felt a warm body pressed against your back, and Joel was quick to shove you inside the one-stall bathroom. With a quick turn of the lock, he had you pinned to the ceramic sink and his mouth crashing against yours. While you tangled your fingers into his messy curls, Joel worked at your shorts, tugging the tight denim down your hips and thighs. He broke away from your lips, staring down at your bare sex as you spread your legs slightly. 
“Fuckin’ christ, babydoll,” he exhaled. “Can’t believe you been keepin’ this from me all night.”
“Like what you see?” 
Joel wrapped two strong hands behind your thighs and lifted you onto the edge of the sink. You gasped at the shock of the cold against your bare ass, bucking your hips forward to search for his warmth. He lowered himself onto his knees, keeping a firm grip on your thighs as you settled your calves over his shoulders. Peering up at you between your parted legs, Joel gave you a wicked grin before brushing his nose up your inner thighs. 
“You know I won, right?” You questioned as his tongue pressed against your throbbing clit. “Technically, I should be calling the shots.”
Joel glared up at you, his pupils blown wide under the red lights of the bathroom. 
“Y’can call the shots all you want later,” he mumbled. “Right now, you’re mine.”
You cried as his tongue dipped inside you, his jaw working overtime to pull each pitiful sound from your body. He drew circles around your slick folds, purposefully avoiding your aching clit. You whined every time his tongue brushed close to it, that agonizing surge of pleasure coursing through your body. Music from the bar drifted into the bathroom, layering over the frustrated cries leaving your lips. 
“Stop teasing, cowboy,” you panted, bucking your hips against his tongue.
“This is what ya’ get, darlin’,” Joel spoke against your wet cunt.
“Please,” you begged.
He pulled away entirely, leaving you chasing the orgasm you never got. Spinning you toward the mirror, Joel worked at freeing his cock with one hand while pressing the other hand into your spine. You flattened against the sink, your hands pressed against the mirror. Glancing up, you met his eyes in the mirror, watching as his lips twitched into a devilish grin. That was all the warning he gave before he drove into you in one fluid stroke. 
“Fuck!” You cried, your head falling between your shoulders.
Joel’s hand wound around your hair, twisting it into a ponytail and yanking your neck back until you strained against his grip. 
“Nuh uh, babydoll,” Joel grunted. “Watch me while I fuck you.”
You locked your eyes with his through the reflection, watching as his face twisted into something carnal. He pounded into you with enough force to make the sink underneath you creak with the weight pressed against it. Joel kept a relentless pace, dismissing every whine and sob falling off your lips. He reached around you with his other hand, wrapping his hand around your throat and squeezing tight. You heaved in a breath as your vision blurred, the pleasure mixing with pain every time he slammed into you.
Your orgasm started surging up through your core, snaking into your bloodstream and becoming unbearable to hold back. You choked out a sob, your thighs quaking as the pleasure built inside your stomach.
“Joel,” you choked. 
“Y’need to cum, babydoll?” Joel taunted, driving into you hard.
His cock hit the right spot over and over again until he felt your cunt clenching around him. He pulled out at the exact moment your orgasm exploded through your body, liquid gushing out of you and down your thighs. Joel growled in approval, sinking back into you as the aftershocks sent tremors through your limbs.
“Good fuckin’ girl,” he praised. “Keep takin’ my fuckin’ cock. I ain’t done yet, babydoll.”
His hand was still gripping your throat, his fingers applying more pressure to cut off your ragged whimpers. You clawed at the edge of the sink, entirely at Joel’s mercy as he wrecked into you harder…faster. He didn’t lie when he said he was going to fuck the sass out of you; you were helpless in this moment. 
But you fucking loved it.
“So. Fuckin’. Good.” Joel punched out each word through every thrust. 
Joel released your throat and wrapped both hands in your hair, using it to guide your hips back against his cock. You were so full of him and so sore, but you couldn’t deny the pressure swelling inside your stomach. You gasped for air as each thrust grew stronger, his cock assaulting you until you spasmed under him and let your orgasm rush out of you. 
“Fuck! Fuck… fuck… fuck,” you chanted, chasing the throbbing pulse inside your body. 
Warm liquid drenched his cock, the lewd sound of his hips meeting yours echoing around you. Joel pulled out suddenly, leaving you hollow and soaked. Wrangling you to your knees, Joel pumped his cock over your open mouth, grunting out your name as his release painted your tongue and lips. Bending down to eye level, Joel lapped up the cum dripping off your swollen lips before bringing his hand up to slap your cheek. He rubbed a hand over your face, smearing your makeup around, leaving you a fucked-out mess.
“Y’look so pretty like this,” he hummed, pulling you in for a hungry kiss. You whimpered into his mouth, his tongue intertwining with yours. 
“I love you, babydoll,” he sighed, pressing his lips against your forehead. 
“I love you too, cowboy,” you preened. 
You were used to him being rough—dominant—but this possessiveness was intoxicating. You wanted more.
“I think I should sass you more often,” you giggled. 
“You enjoy bein’ fucked like a bratty lil’ slut?” He smirked. 
“Love it,” you exhaled, dragging him back to your mouth. 
Joel helped you back into your shorts after you both took a moment to breathe. You turned towards the mirror and admired the complete mess that you were; your hair was mangled into knots, your shirt was askew, and your face was covered in streaks of mascara, smeared lipstick, and drool. A giggle bubbled out of you as you tried to tame down your hair and wipe away some of the makeup coating your rosy cheeks. Joel grabbed your hand, tugging you away from the mirror.
“Leave it,” he whispered. “Want everyone to see how filthy you are.”
“Seriously?” You gaped. 
Joel nodded his eyes, his eyes coasting over your body. 
“Seriously, babydoll. Need to show them you’re mine.”
“I think they already know,” you said pointedly. “I’m pretty sure I was loud enough to break the jukebox.”
He chuckled at your statement, tapping your ass and guiding you toward the door. Dropping his mouth to your ear, he softly kissed your neck before twisting the lock open.
“C’mon, darlin’. Let’s go home so y’can have your way with me.”
“I’m going to make you pay for this, cowboy,” you warned. “I'm going to have you on your knees begging for it.”
“I’ll happily worship you all night, babydoll,” he smiled, kissing your cheek before guiding you into the hall and out to his truck.
812 notes · View notes
familyvideostevie · 5 months
Text
day after tomorrow
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joel miller x reader
summary: joel drops you off and picks you up from the airport. you are definitely falling in love with him. 
warnings: modern no outbreak au, game!joel or hbo!joel, fluff, really just a fluff fest honestly, new-ish relationship, falling in love, sweet enough to make your teeth ache | 2.7k
A/N: this is a christmas gift for my dear friend @strangerfreaks who makes my life better in every way possible. i love you! hope you enjoy this <3
___
He's leaning on the side of the truck when you hurry outside with your stuff. 
"Morning," you call. It's barely that, sky still dark and air still carrying the bite of the night's chill. 
Joel straightens up and gives you a tired smile. Most of his smiles are tired but they're always genuine when directed at you. He tugs the backpack from your shoulder and presses his lips to your cheek, beard scratching your skin gently. 
"Howdy," he says in your ear before pulling away.
The travel mug Joel pushes into your hands is warm to the touch. 
"Tea," he says before you can tell him it's too early for coffee. His voice is deeper than usual, still warming up from sleep. It's not a cup from the local shop -- they're not open yet -- so he must have made it at home. "No caffeine before flights." 
"You remembered?" 
He gives you an unimpressed look and grabs your bags. They go in the backseat of his truck and he jerks his chin at the passenger door. "Get in. S'chilly."
It's also early. So early you were not going to ask him to drive you to the airport but when you mentioned you had to go on a work trip he offered. Insisted, actually, once he found out what time you needed to get there.
"You ain't takin' a cab that early," he had said. "Hell, you ain't takin' a cab home, neither. I'll pick you up."
This thing between you isn't new anymore, not exactly, but it's not solid yet. It doesn't have a name. But it's been a few months and you know what his sheets smell like and the feel of him pressed against you in the middle of the night and how he laughs with his head thrown back, mouth wide and eyes creased at the corners. He likes to take you on long walks around the lake a few towns over and you know all about his daughters even if you haven't met them yet. Your life feels a little more solid with Joel in it and the swell of your heart in your chest when you talk to him, when you see him, when he looks at you, is a welcome feeling. It's nice to want and be wanted in return. 
The inside of his truck is warm, your seat heater already turned on. The radio is down to a low hum and there's a silver cup similar to your own in the holder between the seats. Joel gets back into the truck with a slight groan and glances at you to see if you've got your seatbelt on before he clicks his. 
"Ready?" he asks. You nod. He settles his hand on your headrest and looks out the back windshield as he reverses the truck out of the driveway. "Shouldn't hit much traffic," he says. 
You take a sip of your tea and watch him as he drives out of your neighborhood and towards the highway. Part of you wishes you would hit traffic so you could look at him longer. Even in the dark you know his face pretty well by now. His hair is getting a little long, the dark threaded through with some grey and falling over his perpetually lined forehead. The scar on the bridge of his nose that you love to run your finger across and the bruises under his eyes from too many nights up late working on site plans and employee schedules. You don't think you've met a man who works as hard as Joel, and yet here he is driving you to the airport when he could be sleeping. 
Maybe it's because he's tired or maybe it's because it's dark or maybe it's because you're leaving for a few days but Joel lets you look without teasing. His eyes catch yours for just a second and he smirks.
"Why don't you drink coffee before a flight?" He takes a sip of his own thermos. You watch his throat work as he swallows and look away this time. The sky is starting to look purple out your window, the trees and fields and occasional buildings flying by too fast for your eyes to settle on anything. Joel drinks coffee like it's water. You're still leaning things about each other -- most days you find yourself thinking that you want to be learning things about him for the rest of your life -- and this is a new topic of conversation. You haven't had to be on a plane since you met him.
"I don't really like flying," you say. "Makes me nervous. I figure caffeine will just make it worse."
"Don't like it much either." You look at him again and find see smirk turn to a frown as he merges onto the nearly empty highway. "You gonna be okay?"
He asks like it's within his power to make flying something enjoyable, to cancel your work trip, to squash everything in this world that makes you nervous. Mostly you're just glad he's not teasing you about it. Maybe someday you can take a trip and be grumpy about it together.
"I'll be fine, Joel."
"Hm."
He rests an elbow against the window and rakes his hand through his hair.
"What are you up to this week?" you ask. 
He sighs. "Not much," he says. "Lumber shipment but Tommy's handlin' it. Ellie says her shower head is actin' funny so I'll go to her place and look at that. Probably sit my ass on the couch and try to watch a damn football game or somethin'."
"So what I'm hearing is you're going to miss me." It's meant to be a tease but it comes out a bit more earnest than you'd like. 
He sends you that unamused look of his but the mirth in his eyes betrays him, tells you he sees through it. You're learning that he's good at that -- seeing what you really mean, what you really want, who you really are, all the way down to the core. "Course I will," he says. "What man wouldn't miss cold hands bein' stuck up his shirt when he gets in bed?"
You scoff and Joel snickers. You could remind him how he usually catches your hands in his before you make it to his hemline on the rare nights he does wear a shirt, how he cradles your fingers and blows on them softly while rubbing them with his perpetually warm palms. The memory makes your breath hitch just a bit. 
It's only three days. Some conference your boss wanted you to go to in his stead. It won't require much of you -- you just have to attend a few panels, a dinner or two, and schmooze a little bit. You'll be back before you know it. You tell yourself it's silly to feel this apprehension at the distance, the time apart. But you're used to Joel by now and damn if you won't miss him. Used to him taking up space in your kitchen, used to his arm around you on the couch, used to his short texts and heavy gaze. You know by now that it's only a matter of time before you love him.  
"I'll miss you, too," you say softly. Joel eyes you, smirk turned soft again and reaches for you. He settles his palm on your thigh and you cover your hand with his. 
When you get to the airport aren't many cars around and you're pretty sure the attendants won't yell at you for idling. Joel seems to think the same thing as he gets out of the truck to set your luggage on the ground. You leave your now-empty to-go mug in his car and throw your arms around him when he gets to the curb with your suitcase. His chest rumbles in amusement but he hugs you back, one palm rubbing between your shoulder blades until you pull away. 
"Thank you for --"
"Nope," he interrupts you. "No thanks allowed." He hands you your backpack and you shoulder it. "I'll pick you up on Wednesday," he says. 
You wave him off. "I get in way too late, don't worry about it --"
His hand cups your cheek and the words sputter out in your throat. "I'll be here," he says again. 
"I'll call you," you say. "When I get there." It sounds like a question.
His eyes crinkle at the corners. "Please do."
"Thanks for the tea --"
"Now, what did I just say?"
You wrinkle your nose at him and he rolls his eyes before leaning in to press his lips to yours. You sigh into the kiss just a little though it remains chaste, mouths closed as his thumb strokes your cheek once, twice, before he pulls away. It's the kind of kiss that feels fond, feels familiar. A kiss that becomes routine and for a second you imgaine the press of your mouths a thousand times over just like this. 
"Safe flight, sweetheart."
You smile at him and grab your suitcase before you stand here kissing him all day. "Bye, Joel." 
6:04 am: you make it to your gate okay?
You send him a picture of your breakfast sandwich and the sun rising through the window, painting the sky purple and orange. 
6:05 am: don't text and drive!
He replies with a photo of a full mug of coffee on his counter. It's a silly one, a dinosaur wearing a Santa hat. You think Sarah got it for him as a gag gift. 
6:05 am: home already. let me know when you land
6:06 am: will do. have a good day!
The flight is pretty okay. You spend the bumpy moments thinking about Joel's hand on your leg and get through it just fine. A shuttle takes you to your hotel and you have to hurry a bit to be ready for your first panel. 
You're busy all day. So tired by the time you get back to your room that you flop on the bed with a groan. 
"Ugh," you say, face smushed into the sheets. You're tired and hungry and...you miss Joel and feel a little silly about it.
That sense of puppy love, as most people would call it, hasn't faded. Your feelings for Joel are more than the crush they were when you first started seeing each other but they still linger in the realm of infatuation. You like to look at him, to feel the solid warmth of him beside you, above you, underneath you. You like being near him. But you're also starting to love things. You love the way his voice sounds when he wakes up, the way he says your name over the phone, the way he asks you what you want, how you are, how your day was. You love to see him on your couch, in your kitchen, in your bed. You've started to miss him when he's not around. 
And what you said to him in his truck is true. You do miss him. It's an ache that sits in the center of your chest, an ache that feels like the best kind of bruise -- because it comes from something good. And because you know it'll be soothed soon enough. 
But, because you're only human, you doubt that it's as serious for him. Joel keeps his cards close to his chest and while you feel like you know him pretty well by now you also have so much to learn. So, though you really want to, you don't pick up the phone and call him. Maybe the next time you're away. 
7:54 pm: day 1 done! ready to get in bed. why do men talk so much?
He texts back immediately. 
7:54 pm: god knows. don't forget to order room service on the company dime. sweet dreams.
You laugh and do as he says. 
The rest of the conference goes the same. By day three you're exhausted and your face hurts from smiling at so many people. Your shoes are no longer comfortable and as soon as the closing keynote ends you're out of there, changing into soft clothes and taking the shuttle to the airport. You text Joel a picture of your airport dinner and then your eye bags and he replies with a cute that has you giggling a little too loudly in public. 
You just want to get home to him. Your own bed is a bonus. 
But then your flight gets delayed. Twice. Joel tells you not to worry, he'll pick you up in the middle of the night if he has to. Once you board you get stuck on the tarmac for another half hour before finally taking off. It's a decidedly less relaxing experience because you're so anxious to be home but you make it. When you land it feels like you're sitting in your seat for ages. You're tired and feel gross and you want to go to bed. Your phone turns back on and you've got one text waiting for you.
10:34 pm: i'll be by baggage claim
That was 15 minutes ago. He must have been checking your flight in the air to get here at a reasonable time. God, you want to touch him. You want to stick your nose in his neck and inhale. 
You try very hard not to run through the terminal to the escalator that goes down to arrivals. It seems to move really fucking slowly once you're on it. As soon as it gets far enough for you to see the baggage claim level and everyone waiting there your eyes search for him. You see some families, a few tired children sleeping in arms that hold them tenderly. A group of girls with a sign that reads WELCOME HOME RACHEL!
And then there's Joel.
Once you spot him it's hard to keep a smile from your face. He's standing there with his hands in his pockets, eyes glued to the escalator. Jeans, jacket, boots, and a firm set to his jaw that might be intimidating to anyone else but to you it's familiar. It's him. Once he sees you he stands a little taller and you see his cheek twitch. If someone wasn't in front of you you'd be down the steps in seconds but you wait until you're at the bottom to race forward. 
It's probably a bit dramatic. You drop your suitcase and backpack at your feet in front of him.
"Hi," you say, and then you throw your arms around his shoulders. Joel laughs. 
"S'like you're comin' home from war, or somethin'," he says, though his hugs you back just as tightly. "Should'a made a sign."
"Feels like it." Your words are muffled by his shoulder. 
"That bad, huh?" His palm drags up and down your spine. "Let's get you home, then."
Neither of you pull away. "I missed you," you say softly. 
Joel breathes deep and pulls away, hand on the back of your head as he makes sure you're looking at him. 
"Missed you, too," he says gruffly. Then he kisses you. It's less chaste than your goodbye kiss but still perfectly acceptable for airport arrivals, you think. 
"You hungry?"
"I sent you a picture of my dinner!"
"Not what I asked." You shrug and tangle your fingers with his. His thumb strokes the back of your hand. "We'll get you somethin' on the way home."
"Do you want to stay over?" you ask in a rush, realizing too late he's got no reason to want to. It's late and tomorrow is a workday. "I'm just gonna shower and go to bed but I--"
Joel's nostrils flare. "If you want me to I will." Simple as that. 
"Okay," you say. He squeezes your hand.
You walk in easy silence for a few moments. Once you're in the car you'll ask how his week was, tell him about the gossip you learned at the conference. You'll look at him the entire drive to your place, drinking your fill of him after three days without. Yeah, you're going to love him. It's just a matter of time.
"Thank you for coming to get me," you say. 
Joel looks like he wants to argue but he allows it.
"Anytime," he says. It sounds like a promise. 
thank you for reading <3 reblog, send feedback, general masterlist here!
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yanderenightmare · 6 months
Text
TW: hints of NSFW
fem reader
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You have one of those cartoon faces...
So animated it makes everyone else look dull – so much so that everything else just fades into the background.
He wonders if you’re like that during sex as well. All exaggerated – curled toes and ahegao faces – moans that reach the other part of town. Drooling, quivering, tongue out and panting, going cross-eyed from his cock.
It’s all he can think about as you talk. Pretty French tip hands throwing themselves every which way – glossed lips moving but not much being said, just some anecdote from work – eyes vibrant, smile bright. You talk too much, honestly. More guys would bother if you just learned to shut up.
But you won’t scare him away. He decided he was going to fuck you the moment you stepped into the office. Granted, so did half the staff – with the way your breasts bounced on every peppy step you took – doe-eyed and out of place in the grey cubicle you were assigned.
But every single one of them gave up one after the other. 
It’s not their fault. Not everyone has the stamina. You’re a little clueless, after all. 
Shit, he’s been giving you bedroom eyes for hours already, practically fucking you with his stare, but he can’t tell whether you even realize he’s been flirting with you at all.
Your gloss stains the brim of your beer pink – only in one place since you’ve only taken one sip. He doesn’t know whether maybe you’re not a beer person or if it’s because you don’t leave enough time to drink in between words.
He imagines the stain on his cock instead – imagines stuffing himself down your throat, silencing you – making you gag and a little teary-eyed – muffling something he doesn’t care about.
What are you even saying? Something about how clumsy you are? You’re giggling over it – how you’d forgotten your phone and house keys, how your roommate’s bound to be asleep by now – how you have no idea how you’ll get home tonight.
“Wanna know what else I forgot?” You add.
“Sure.” He mumbles uninterestedly, putting his beer up to his lips – letting the cool bubbling soothe the regret of his pursuit – beginning to think up excuses to go talk to one of the other women at the office party – already scanning the bar for other available candidates. Sure, you were pretty, but this wasn’t going anywhere-
“Panties~” You reveal, and he chokes on his beer – dull eyes widening, only now noticing the coy smile playing on your lips. “Are you okay?” You feign a doe-eyed look, sitting legs crossed on your bar stool, leaning over with a manicured hand placing itself on his thigh – cleavage flashed in the bowed position.
There’s something rude glinting in your eyes as you look up at him through heavy lashes.
“Maybe I’m wrong, but I could have sworn you’ve been eyeing me up and down all night.” You flirt cheekily, giving the muscle on his thigh a lingering squeeze – licking your lips at the obvious bulge swelling in his pants. “Undressing me with those pretty jaded eyes of yours~”
Caught off guard, he’s left sitting there – a blush dusting his cheeks a drunken pink.
You lean even closer – so close your fruity perfume clouds his head – your hot breath on the shell of his ear in a sultry whisper. “How about we cut to the chase, hm?”
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BNHA – Tomura, Dabi, Shinso, Bakugou, Kirishima, Hawks
JJK – Toji, Sukuna, Geto, Gojo, Naoya
HQ – Kageyama, Tsukishima, Tendou
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compact-turtle · 1 year
Text
Yandere Farmer x GN Reader pt 2
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Concept: Yandere Farmer x Gn Reader
Tw: Delusional Yandere, Age-gap?, Obsessive, Possessive, Brief Nsfw mentions, Underwear stealing thief 😡
Summary: You and Atticus go on a date to town for supplies.
Word count: 1.7K -> Link to PT 1 (Not necessary to read but does help to understand context) Taglist: @velvetvibes @undeadwaters@lemonlimesocks@justloveme@ladywolf44005@azoart
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-Yandere Farmer who’s convinced your group that a mechanic won’t be able to arrive for at least another week. The four of you are fine with it since it’s currently summer break. There’s no need to rush back immediately. 
-Yandere Farmer who puts everyone to work on the farm outside. Nobody gets to stay at his home for free (even though they technically paid.) The labor is tiring, demanding and grueling underneath the hot summer sun. It irritates him listening to the city folk complain about a few hours of work. Thankfully, a single look is enough for them to stop complaining. 
- You’re the exception. 
-Yandere Farmer who asks you to complete some house chores. You’re given a list of priorities which range from cooking to doing the laundry. He doesn’t scold you if you don’t complete the list. He can’t bear to see you unhappy. It’s difficult work sometimes trying to finish it all. He’d hate for you to tire yourself out. 
-Regardless of your cooking skills, Yandere Farmer enjoys the meals you make for him. It tastes different when you cook it. Almost sweeter somehow. 
-Last night, you’d asked him if he could take you into town. You wanted to make a special type of dinner but needed some more ingredients. 
-At first, Atticus wasn’t too keen on the idea. He despised going into town. They talked too much and word always spread like wildfire. However, he realized he could twist it into his favor. 
-This morning, he woke up earlier than usual. He made sure to bathe and attempted to wash all the grime off. From underneath his nails to his hair. He didn’t want you to be disgusted with him.
-He donned his prized blue button up with a pair of clean boots. Everything was perfect down to the last hair. You’d be so proud strolling through town with him now.  Atticus double checked his reflection in the mirror as he recalled yesterday’s memories. 
- He snuck into your room after he heard you go downstairs. The door was locked behind him as rummaged through your bag. Honestly, you were going to be his spouse soon so he had no qualms about snooping. 
-The bag was like a treasure box filled with goodies. Atticus wanted to take everything inside but you’d notice if so many items went missing. He settled on a pair of cute red underwear. His breath grew heavy as his hands traveled down. 
-Every scenario ran through Atticus’s mind with the red underwear in hand. You under him. You on top of him. You’d be moaning as he left kisses on your shoulders and neck. There’d be traces of his love on each inch of your body. 
-He jumped when he heard the door knob rattle. It twisted and turned. The intruder pounded on the door desperate for it to open. They tried a few more times. Finally, they gave up. 
-His heart still pounded loudly in his chest as he came down from the lust high. God, that was close. Atticus cleaned up the area and neatly put your items back in the bag. However, the red underwear slipped into his pocket.  
-Atticus examined himself one last time before leaving the room. His footsteps were loud and clomped all the way down the stairs. He noticed you standing near the front door waiting for him. 
- For the first time in his life, Atticus felt odd knots in his stomach. His heart was palpitating when he saw you looking all dolled him for him (At least, that’s what he’d like to believe.)
-You smiled at him. Gosh, you were so gorgeous. The morning sunrise couldn’t compare to you. You outmatched the prettiest flower in the field. 
“You look swell today.” Atticus grumbled out. He inwardly cursed himself for not sounding chipper. 
“You’re so sweet, Atticus! I think you look amazing as well. Your shirt really compliments you.” You beamed back at him.
“Hm.” 
-Yandere Farmer who walks right past you. His face was stoic but underneath it all was a range of emotions. His palms were sweaty and he could hear his heartbeat reverberate in his ears. 
-Yandere Farmer guided you to the red pickup truck outside. His two dogs, Otto and Earl excitedly ran around your legs when they noticed you. They sniffed you trying to find signs of treats. The two dogs were so large that they almost knocked you over.
- Atticus wrapped his arm around you to support your balance. Atticus had always warned you about feeding the dogs treats. Obviously, you hadn’t listened to him. 
“Stop bothering them. Get back to work.” Atticus barked at the dogs. 
“Be nice, Atticus. They’re just cute little puppies who deserve a snack!” 
You grabbed some treats from your pockets to feed the dogs. They yipped happily and munched down on them. Atticus held his tongue as he stared at the supposed puppies. You clearly had a soft spot for those demons. Unfortunately, You had no idea that they were taking advantage of your generosity.
-Finally, the dogs left to finish their duties. Atticus opened the door for you as you slid into the passenger seat. The door creaked as he shut it close. He walked to the driver's side then started the car.  
-You stuck your head out the window as you waved to everyone. You called out for them to be on their best behavior and that you’d be back soon. 
-Your friends tearfully waved goodbye as the car drove off. They were so thankful that you begged the farmer to take you into town. He’d finally given them a day off to relax.  The farmer terrified them to no end. You were the only one who didn’t notice his domineering behavior. In fact, you insisted that he was so gentle and kind. 
“Gentle and kind, my ass” They all thought whenever you gushed about him.
-He pulled you towards the farmer’s market near the town square.  Atticus watched as you marveled over the town. It was a quaint place to say the least. Rows of shops lined up against one another with a bright white church standing out in the middle of town. Children’s laughter could be heard along with scolding mothers. The smell of freshly baked bread wafted through the air. 
-You excitedly went off to explore the vendors. Atticus trailed behind making sure to keep an eye on you. There were so many people and he didn’t want you getting lost. 
-He chuckled slightly as you bought items from one booth to another. You seemed like a small squirrel gathering food for the winter. Atticus took the items from your arms and placed them into his bag. 
-His attention was pulled away by a short old woman. Her hair was visibly graying with wrinkles starting to settle in. She grinned as they made eye contact. 
“Hey there, son. Thought you’d fallen in a ditch somewhere since I hadn’t seen your face in a while.” The old woman called out. 
“Apologies for not showing up more, Ma’am.” 
“Just glad to see you doing well. Also, seems like quite the looker you got. Anything serious or just for fun?” 
“Plan on marrying em’ soon.” 
“Well bless your heart. I was afraid you’d be lonely forever. You know, I’ve been praying for the good lord to send you someone. Thankfully my prayers were heard. When’s the wedding?”
“Thinkin’ a few months. Year at the latest.” 
-Atticus continued to converse with them. They grinded on every detail about his love life. He answered as honestly as possible.Maybe over-exaggerating a bit here and  there though. Mentioning how you met due to your friend’s car breaking down and how he heroically saved you a few months ago.
-He clenched his jaw as the vendor raddled on. The vendor was a gentle old woman but her ramblings gave Atticus multiple headaches. It was difficult not to just shut down and ignore them. However, he was aiming for the long game. Patience was a virtue.
“Atticus, I think it’s starting to rain soon. I felt some droplets on my arm. We should go home now.” You said as you came behind him. 
“Well-”
“Dear, you should stay a night in town then. I heard it’s about to be raining dogs and cats out there. Go down to the inn by South St and tell them Donna sent you. They’ll give you a small discount.”  The woman interjected. 
“I’m not sure. What do you think, Atticus?” You asked, staring at him.
“Of course, he agrees. Plus, might give you two some alone time.” The old woman shot Atticus a wink. 
-Atticus wasn’t sure what kind of psychic powers that old woman had. When they arrived at the inn, they were informed there was only a single queen size room left. You tried asking for different options but the staff said, there was nothing they could do. 
-You two were currently laying in bed next to each other. (With a pillow divider much to his dismay) 
-Originally, you wanted to sleep on the ground but he refused that. You deserve the best. Plus, what if your neck was stiff tomorrow or your back hurt? He couldn’t let that happen. 
-It took a while for you to relent. Atticus endlessly coaxed and reassured you that it was fine to share the bed. However, you only agreed with the pillow divider as a compromise.
-Atticus could smell the body wash you used. The scent was sweet with a mix of coffee laced underneath. It took all his will power to not press his lips against yours. The image of your face all red with your moans in his ears. Yesterday’s fantasy began to play in his head and he could feel something rise. 
“I had so much fun today, Atticus. I appreciate you taking me out.” You said from your half of the bed. Your voice breaking him out of his trance.
“My pleasure.” 
“I’m so excited to make dinner tomorrow for us. I’ll work really hard for it to taste good.”
“Can’t wait to try yer cookin’. ”
“And Otto and Earl will be so happy for more treats.” 
“I’m sure they will.” 
“And my friends will be so happy to see us safe tomorrow.” You mumbled as you drifted off. 
-His mood soured immediately. There were still pests at home to exterminate. Atticus wasn’t above shoving a knife in their chest or feeding them to his pigs. Still, those methods were extremely messy. The chances of you finding your so-called “friends” were pretty high. He didn’t want to start his marriage off on a bad foot. 
-You grumbled in your sleep. He chuckled then gently traced your face with his hand. 
-Whatever
-He’d enjoy the moment with you now. Those vermin could wait to be dealt with. 
-Atticus leaned down and kissed your forehead. 
“Goodnight, Doll.” 
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Note
Imagining being locked into a pillory for several days as punishment for some minor indiscretion, the town I live in both conservative and authoritarian and the church ruling with an iron fist that is tolerated due to the fear of the 'demons' in the forest. I am clamped into heavy wooden blocks at the wrists and neck and cannot see anything behind me.
During the day the townsfolk largely look away, a few throwing small stones or refuse at me from a distance. One or two bolder types come close enough to beat me with hard, painful strokes with their cane or riding crop.
At night, though, I feel movement behind me and my dress being pushed up around my waist, and though I expected this I still beg them to reconsider. It is not a large town, whoever this is I know them and I cannot bear the shame. An answer comes as a growl; that, I did not expect. I am locked tight into the blocks and cannot get away when I feel the clawed hands on me, when I feel the too-large, ridged and knotted cock burying itself in me. I can't see what it is. I only know it cannot be human.
It fucks me roughly but less brutal than I expect, then I feel it swell and lock inside me, hours of midnight silence to follow broken only by my ragged breathing and the occasional low growl. It pulls out of me a little before the sun starts to rise. I can hear it begin to pad away, and without thinking, exhausted and shaking, I thank it out loud for not killing me. After all, that is what everyone says demons do.
It comes back the next night. Well, something like it does. Maybe there's more than one of them.
It - or they - come back and mount me each night, breeding me like the trapped animal I am. I never see them. But in the pitch black of night I occasionally feel half a piece of fresh, sweet fruit stuffed into my mouth, or a dribble of water. And during the day the cruel treatment ebbs, people's enthusiasm dimmed by a new wave of supernatural attacks. Savage, and unpredictable. Or so they say, but their glances flicker scared in my direction. A pattern they do not want to see; anyone who came close and beat me has not survived the night.
When I am released from the pillory I wait a few days to allay suspicion then disappear in the night with everything I need in a small satchel. I get out into the dark forest, where the demons live, and in the soft glow of sunset I strip naked and drop to my knees, lowering my body to the ground and my hips high, legs parted. I want them to come. I want them to take me. I want to see them. I want to thank them.
.
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rainylana · 24 days
Text
“Takin’ care of my best girl.”
Eddie Munson x female reader
summary: reader has a panic attack during the night.
warnings: panic attack, anxiety, tears and descriptions of anxiety symptoms, hurt/comfort, fear of allergic reaction/throat swelling.
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You’re sitting on the porch. The air is cool and breezy against your face, the moon shines a calming light on the grass in from of you, making it shimmer. There’s cats roaming in trash cans. Maybe they’re raccoons, actually. It was a beautiful night, but you weren’t really able to enjoy it.
Your heart was pounding, head aching and body trembling with fear, a fear you didn’t know what it exactly was. Your stomach was so twisted with knots and nerves you thought you’d surely pass out. It hurt to breath. You couldn’t breath. Your hands were cradling your head, holding your body tight and hoping it would pass.
It always passed. It always went away and you were always okay. They didn’t normally get this bad. You were getting so much better at handling them. For some reason tonight wasn’t the case. You debated waking Eddie up, but you hated keeping him up with you when you got this way. It wasn’t fair to him.
You had tried all the things to help you. You squeezed an ice cub in your palm, took a cold shower, tried watching to tv to distract yourself. You couldn’t stop swallowing, testing to see if your throat was closing up, which was now raw and irritated from your constant swallowing. You tried taking deep breaths, hands shaking as you placed a hand over your chest, grasping at your shirt.
Once you thought you were getting better, it would start up again. The sudden racing of your heart that made you breathless. After a few minutes, you began to pace, gripping at your chest and willing it to go away. What if there was something wrong with you? Were your lungs actually closing? Were you having an allergic reaction?
That’s what got you every time. You always thought you were dying, and you never were.
You needed to go to the hospital. You couldn’t stand it anymore. You’d been to the er many times for panic attacks, but what if it was serious this time? With trembling legs you walked back inside to your bedroom, rounding the bed and shaking Eddie urgently.
“Eddie?” Your still holding your chest. “Eddie?”
His eyes flutter open, squinting in the dark. “Hmm?”
“I’m scared.” You say, bringing up a nail to bite. “I think something might be wrong.”
Those key words had him sitting up, rubbing his eyes. He leans over and switches on the light, looking up to take you in. He knows what’s wrong immediately, lifting the blanket so he can get out of bed. “What’s going on?” His voice is tired and gruff. “You anxious about something?”
You shake your head yes, grasping at your throat. “I- I uh, I think my throat might be swelling up. Maybe I ate something.”
He nods slowly, bringing his hands up to ghost at your arms. “What brought this on? Did it just start?”
“No, I’ve been up awhile.” You say, trying to swallow again. You do, but harshly, pushing out a choked breath that has you pacing around the room. “Eddie, I’m scared.”
“You’re alright, baby.” He’s following you, grabbing your hand. “Come on, let’s go out to the living room.” He guides you out there, sitting you on the kitchen chair by the stove. “I’ll make you some tea.”
Your eyes start to well up and you shake your head. “No, I- I think we should go to the hospital, Eddie.” Your voice came out desperate.
He’d done this with you so many times, yet the urgency and fear in your voice always made him nervous, even though he knew you were completely fine. He puts the tea in the microwave, setting it for two minutes before he’s crouching in front of you. “Hey,” He’s grasping your face. “You’re alright. You know that. We just have to work through it okay? Like we always do.”
You let out a sob that makes his heart ache, a tear dropping town to his wrist. “But I’m scared.”
“I know you are.” He coos, petting your hair. “If you really want to go I’ll take you, but you’re strong enough to fight this, baby. I’m right here with you, right? We can get through this.” He leans up and kisses your forehead, then your cheek, going back to the microwave to let you think.
Your knee is bouncing quickly, your knuckles tapping at the table like you’re trying to communicate through morse code. Your breathing gets heavier and heavier, your head getting harder to keep up. You gasp, groaning loudly as you lean over.
He’s bringing the cup of tea over to you quickly, sitting it on the table to hold your back. “Just breath, sweetheart.” He’s rubbing your back, crouching beside you. “You’re alright.”
You start to sob, head between your knees as you fight to be sick. You hiccup, shoulders shaking with your cries. You reach to grip his arm. “My stomach hurts so bad.”
It wasn’t rare for you to throw up when you got worked up. He quickly brought the kitchen trashcan over to you, sitting it in front of you so you could have it at the ready.
“Keep breathing.” He instructs you, bringing the tea over to you. “Here, try and drink some of this.” He wasn’t ever sure if the tea helped, but it made him feel useful when you got to feeling poorly.
When your tea is gone, after practically gulping down the hot liquid, he’s rubbing your shaking shoulders, trying to get the knots out of muscles. He switches on the tv to gilligans island, the episode where the professor is trying to make a phone out of a coconut and a banana peel.
You keep crying through half of the episode, coiling over here and there. When you did, he rubbed the back of your neck and kissed your shoulder, telling you to breath and that you were going to get through it.
When you’re three episodes in, your tears have stopped and you’re left with nothing but embarrassment and humiliation, your face beat red as you begin to mutter an apology. “I’m sorry.” Your voice is shaky and hoarse. He’s sitting beside you now, his arm tossed around your shoulders.
“Don’t be.” He smiles, tapping your nose. “Just doing my job.”
“Your job?” You sniffle.
“Takin’ care of my best girl.” He kissed you, a quick peck on the lips as he leans over and turns off the living room light, snuggling back into the couch and pulling you into his chest.
545 notes · View notes
cybersunnie · 2 months
Text
So Divine ✶ Steve Harrington
18+ / MDNI — literally just smut w/ some fluff, f!reader, petnames (sweetheart, baby) got inspired by @/season4steve's comments (wc: 1k)
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Steve was a gentle lover.
Compliments, spontaneous gifts, late-night calls because he wanted to hear your voice before bed. He was always soft and sweet with you, all boyish charm and smiles.
With his parents out of town again, you and Steve had the house all to yourselves. It started innocently. A movie night at his place, cuddling on the couch, the light touch on your hip growing more greedy as the night went on. You tried to ignore it, eyes trained on the screen, but you were still all too aware of his glances and smirks that meant no good. 
Your efforts were pointless.
The cheesy horror flick Steve had mindlessly picked out at work turned into background noise when he leaned in and kissed you slow, testing the waters. Your lips melted between his, warmth blossoming in your chest, your skin tingling. Whispers of I want you filled your ears, and you were suddenly putty in his hands—a mindless thing made of flesh and bones.
One thing led to another, and the both of you stumbled up the stairs and to his bedroom, giggling into the other’s mouth.
Your curves and edges, and his scars and birthmarks.
Steve had you pinned beneath him, his sheets wrinkled and a mess, clothes discarded and forgotten. You gasped so prettily for him, your face crumbling with ecstasy every time his hips snapped forward to meet yours, the slow drag of his cock making your head spin.
Even as he took you, Steve was nothing but gentle. Every kiss and touch ghosted over your skin like he was afraid to hurt you. 
As if you were a delicate flower, each limb a petal he wanted to preserve, to dote on. 
“You’re so pretty,” he rasped out, his nose nudging yours, urging you to look at him.
You keened, cheeks burning, eyes hazy with pleasure. How Steve looked at you was overwhelming—like you were the only good thing in the world.
"Yeah? You like being my pretty girl?"
You nodded and held him tighter, not wanting this to end. Your nails dug into his back, the crescent indents adding to his constellation of moles and freckles.
With Steve, all you saw were stars.
His gaze softened, a crinkle between his brows. "I know you do," he murmured, ducking his head down and kissing your jaw. Steve felt you shiver, your cunt squeezing his cock, snug and warm. He fought the urge to bite your shoulder as he buried himself deeper inside of you. "Fuck, sweetheart. You're killing me."
You wondered if Steve knew how much control he had over you. If he knew that his voice made everything around you feel light. If he knew that, in your mind, he embodied the night sky.
That he was timeless. Divine. A mysterious beauty.
He deserved to know.
But your voice was gone, the words stuck in your throat. The knot in your stomach grew tighter. The inevitable inched closer. You could only utter a meek whimper of his name with your fingers digging into his flesh. 
Steve pulled his face from your neck and looked at you, stilling himself. “What, baby?”
He sounded so concerned, so sincere—it just made you want him more.
You whined and pressed the heels of your feet against his ass, begging him to move, to keep fucking you. Thankfully, Steve took the hint, pulling out a few inches before pushing back in, his heart swelling with pride when you whimpered.
Steve knew you were close. He could fucking feel it.
"Keep squeezing me like that—holy shit," Steve groaned, almost whining, as your cunt pulsated around his cock. "You're close, huh? You gonna come for me?"
Overwhelmed, you shut your eyes. It was too much. Steve's body flushed with yours, your ears buzzing, your heart pounding so hard it rattled your ribcage—it was all too much.
And Steve noticed. He always noticed.
Soft and soothing, he whispered your name and grasped your chin, your skin warming under his fingertips.
"Look at me."
Reluctantly, you opened your eyes. Steve smiled the same smile that swept you off your feet the first time you met him. He leaned his forehead against yours, his usual sweet brown eyes hardened with lust, with the desire to please you.
"There we go," Steve murmured, kissing your lips. He let go of your chin and moved his hand, his large palm enveloping the side of your face. You leaned into his touch, your brows drawing tightly together as Steve kept fucking you nice and slow. "You still with me, yeah?"
You nodded, mind-numbing.
"Yeah," he cooed, his mouth hovering over yours, breaths mingling. A pitiful whine escaped you, and he swallowed it with another kiss. "You're okay. You're doing so good."
It was all tangled heat and longing. Your hands trailed into his hair, soft and roots drenched with sweat. Mouths hung open, moans and gasps, your hearts becoming one.
Steve grunted, head dipping down into the crook of your neck, his hips rocking into yours. "C'mon, baby, give it to me."
You were at his mercy, unprotected, bare of armor.
The knot snapped.
Pleasure erupted in the pit of your belly and wrecked through you. You cried out his name in gasps and moans, your legs locking around his waist, fingers tugging at his hair. Steve whimpered as if he was wounded, his thrusts faltering, tongue swirling over your pulse points, and teeth nipping at your skin.
Wrapped up in the other and your sweaty limbs entangled, the intensity died down, heavy breaths filling the air. Neither of you moved—a silent agreement to stay connected a little longer. 
"I love you," Steve whispered, leaving a trail of kisses along your jaw until he reached your mouth. He stared at you with adore-filled eyes, his cheeks flushed and hair disheveled from your own doing. "I love you so much."
Through your haze, you grinned, fingers sowing through his hair, "I love you more."
Steve snorted, shaking his head. "Impossible."
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author's note: yay i finally finished something!!!!! it had been such a long time since i wrote smut so i'm sorry if this wasn't up to par LMAO but i love me some soft and sappy sex
anyways i hope you enjoyed this!!! tysm for reading! <3
501 notes · View notes
lisired · 2 months
Text
forever yours
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pairing: haechan x (f) reader
genre/warnings: smut (lots of it), horror, graphic depictions of violence, mentions of blood, major character death, mentions of suicide, oral (m/f receiving), unprotected sex (don’t be silly, wrap your willy!), exhibitionism
summary: Thirst for exhilaration and a stupid dare brings you, your boyfriend Haechan, and your friends to the eerie camping grounds of Chimera - the name of a town rumored to be occupied by a number of vengeful, lurking spirits. But nothing is as it seems in this ghost town.
word count: 23k (see what had happened was…)
a/n: Halloween is gone but I just could not pass the opportunity to finally write a Haechan horror fic. as always, feedback is appreciated!
There was blood in your mouth. 
A tart, pungent taste followed. Your tongue ached, crying with agony. 
You pivoted around and groaned, “What the hell?” 
As it turned out, the culprit was no other than Winter. And you were less than pleased to be met with the sight of your own best friend giggling in your face. 
“You should have seen your face,” Winter teased, laughing to the point of tears. 
You only rolled your eyes. Curse her and her stupid shenanigans. October was official and Halloween was fresh in the air and given so, she would be a constant of mischief.
Fortunately for Winter, she was your best friend. If not, you would not have hesitated to give her a very large piece of your mind. 
You whined, “You made me bite my tongue.”
Your boyfriend, Haechan, snapped out of his fury-induced trance long enough to pull you close and ask wrathfully, “You’re hurt?” 
“Just a little,” you admitted with a grimace. Now, it hurt to speak. You swayed on the heels of your feet to press a placating kiss to the corner of his lips and say, “Don’t worry, baby. I’m okay.”
Apologetic, Winter frowned and told you, “I’m sorry, bestie. I’m sure Haechan will kiss it better. Seeing as you were a total of two seconds from swallowing each other’s tongues and all.”
Like she was a fly, you swatted her away and sent her off snickering incessantly. Your boyfriend was most likely turned off by now, all things considered. You were about to kiss before Winter screeched, “Bug!” and effectively gave you the scare of your life. 
You were in the middle of nowhere, after all. Chimera was a ghost town with a very tiny population and even fewer tourist attractions because anyone who valued their life would not dare explore the haunted hell town. 
Not to mention you were in the woods. You were on creepy-crawly territory. A stupid, childish dare brought you to the wicked. Last weekend, Jaehyun instigated a game of truth or dare for old times sake, and dared you all to stay a weekend at the haunted camping site. So the story goes. Neither of you were adamant believers in ghoul tales. 
At one point in his tetchiness, Haechan’s expression began to teeter between devilish and sinister, and a very gray area existed there. His dark eyes glared into the distance, although your best friend had already sauntered off in hounding of her next victim. 
Very rarely did your boyfriend wind up on the suffering end of vexation, but having his time with you interrupted would never not do the trick. 
Every time without fail. 
Nevertheless, you couldn’t blame him, but it made your heart swell with sadness. Alas, jam-packed work schedules and even less time for yourselves, your time together nowadays was limited. You came home to each other every night, but grueling days of work meant you were often sound asleep by the time he arrived. 
Sometimes, you would bring work home with you and stay up late, but Haechan would be snoring by the time you finally finished up and crawled under the sheets of your shared bed. 
This put a bit of strain on not only your relationship, but your friendships. Which was part of the reason you agreed to the stupid dare in the first place.
Obviously, it still wasn’t just the two of you, but you’d make it work. You had to. Alongside your best friend, her boyfriend, Jaehyun, was here. Like hell he would send the love of his life into haunted woods without him there to protect her. As well as Ten and Yuta. 
Your boyfriend was still displeased. A part of you was comforted by his protectiveness over you. Still, you wanted to soothe him before all hell broke loose. Bracing a hand on your boyfriend’s chest, you consoled, “Baby, I’m fine. I swear.”
Your lover was aflame, though the sweet sound of your voice made him soften. Only a little. He made sure you were flush against his body. “Promise?”
“I promise,” you replied, grinning from ear to ear. And sending his heart gravitating towards the moon. Then, you purred, “How about we go let off some of that steam in the cabin?”
Haechan smirked and you knew that you had your boyfriend back. “I like the way that sexy brain of yours thinks.”
Giggling, the two of you raced to the cabin. 
Your new home for the weekend was a tiny wooden cabin that was surprisingly very warm and comfy. There were three in total, each surrounding a campfire area. A lake was not too far off and cleared for safe swimming. And there were a couple of trails nearby. 
For an avowedly haunted campground, it was beautiful as far as you’d seen. There were vibrant wildflowers scattered everywhere and the water was crystal-fucking-clear. The sound of nature - leaves rustling in the wind and squirrels clambering up tree branches - was pleasantly therapeutic. 
Now, you were thinking about morning sex with Haechan, moans masking the sounds of birds chirping. 
The sight of you rushing to your cabin, nearly tripping over twigs in the process, was nothing short of comical. Though you found slight humor in your desperation, there was a rationale behind your every move. Above all, you couldn’t remember the last time you and your boyfriend had sex, and you were in need of a refresher. 
The kind of refresher only good dick and loving could give you.
Haechan very nearly kicked in the door. You let out a cry of surprise when he jerked it back in place with his toe and flung you against the surface, kissing you none too gently. 
You lingered there for a long while, making out in a hot, messy battle to conquer. Your chest heaved breathlessly, moans dangling from your lips in departure as you sucked each other’s tongues with pleasure. For a second, you pulled back, bringing your lips to that sweet spot on your boyfriend’s empty neck. For now. 
When he made a sharp noise and swiftly lowered you to the bed, you knew you were in for one hell of a fucking. 
It went without saying that this was going to be a far cry from a typical round of love-making. Your boyfriend was going to fuck you until every inch of the forest knew his name.
At the sight of you fumbling with his pants, Haechan chuckled and gathered your hands in his, teasing, “Slow down, baby girl.”
“Fuck me,” you heaved, as if the air had suddenly gotten thicker. Your eyes begged for him to give what you desperately craved on behalf of your body. “Hyuck, please.”
Your boyfriend gave a shake of his head, donning the most taunting smile. “Not yet,” he said, chuckling. It was nothing short of delightful to hear you beg for him, but he needed to savor you. It had been too long. “Not before I get a taste.”
Not a second later, your core throbbed, obviously excited about something now. Haechan was quick on his feet and between your thighs in the time that it took you to blink. Your panties disappeared with a yank, quickly tossed into oblivion. Your body shivered in anticipation, knowing what was to come. Haechan ate you out better than anyone to date. 
You got comfortable, laying sprawled and vulnerable. Your boyfriend was in a temporary trance, eyeing your glistening cunt with sheer admiration. You could feel the heat of his breath there, making you tingle with want all over. 
Haechan could feel himself twitching in his pants. Fuck, you were already so damn wet. Though that was nothing new. There was something about making out with your boyfriend that could arouse you like nothing else. 
Before he caved, Haechan made sure to tease, “Be careful not to scream. Your tongue will hate me.”
That made you roll your eyes, identifying your boyfriend as his usual cocky self. Though for good reason. No man had ever made you scream much like him. “Try not to make me scream. Everyone will hate us,” you quipped. 
“No can do, baby. I’m a natural.”
With a shake of your head, you shook with laughter. Granted, there was a good amount of feet between each cabin, but when at your boyfriend’s mercy, you were loud enough to wake the worlds below and above. 
Ever the tease, Haechan lifted his lips and kissed his way from your belly down to the vertex of your plush thighs. You made a noise, noticing he’d skipped between. He nibbled at the edges, rendering you impatient and weaker. You could only writhe and whimper, aware that you were being tested. Or toyed with, for that matter. 
Then, your lover went to town, having his fill of riling you up. You shuddered, eyes closing the very second his tongue muscled in your slick folds. Every muscle in your body was taut with tension. A kind of tension only concocted over time by a lack thereof to be broken loose.
There was a catch in your breath when Haechan lapped at you without holding back. He was a creature of desire, fingernails clamped harshly into your unfurled thighs. You were already moaning, already crying his name. There was no limit on him, none on pleasure when with him. You could already sense the tension dwindling in place of a different kind; the ecstatic variety. 
Though you had been inclined to watch the view, your head angled back in a soft sigh, flush against the pillows. It was a talent how effortlessly Haechan could dismantle you. More or less. The language of your body was indefinitely etched into his memory. 
“God. Oh my fucking…,” you gasped, sentence interrupted by an ensuing moan. This was only the beginning and yet already you were undone. 
Haechan tasted your arousal on the very tip of his tongue and let out an unrestrained, beast-like growl of pleasure. In your mind, it almost seemed fitting. He lapped at you like a ravenous creature. But in his mind, you were the one to blame. You always had to taste so damn sweet. 
You fisted locks of his hair in your fingers, back arching when he targeted your sensitive bundle of nerves. Your body was aflame, and you could feel the blood pumping through your veins hotly. “Don’t stop. Baby, please don’t stop,” you choked, promptly reduced to whimpers of pleasure. And cries of your lover’s name. 
A vortex of pleasure consumed you, tossing you unceremoniously around the eye. Your thighs and toes tingled, a sign that your entire body was very much awake and alert. It came to life at Haechan’s touch, turned on at the way his tongue pivoted on your clit and penetrated your tight hole. There were sparks broiling under your skin, ignited everywhere. 
Haechan slid two fingers inside your pulsing cunt and your eyes promptly rolled to the back of your skull. 
For whatever reason, he was grinning from ear to ear. This was far from his first rodeo, and after years of this relationship, he had the once-mystery of your mind and body completely unraveled. No matter how much you tried to writhe away, overstimulated by the pleasure, there was no such thing as escape.  
He liked watching you squirm as if you had anywhere to flee, bracing his palms on your naked thighs. He liked watching you involuntarily arch your back and rock your hips into his mouth with greed, your systems entering shutdown. Even more, he liked that he made so much of a mess of you that you could hardly seem to tell what you wanted anymore, but the arousal dripping from your cunt was a telltale sign of desire. 
Just like magic, weeks of stress were long-forgotten. Haechan singlehandedly set you at ease and riled you up all the while. Tears of pleasure welled in your eyes and you clamped tightly around his fingers. 
You never knew pleasure of this capacity existed before your boyfriend. He brought you to a different sphere and back, took you higher than you’d ever been. Darn the world. Your boyfriend showed you the universe and made you see every star visible to your eyes. No one had ever made you feel like this. 
Which was not unbeknown to Haechan. When you began to explore your sexuality together, you detailed your past sexcapades very thoroughly to him. None as sensational as those with your boyfriend. As it turned out, they all lacked one thing in common; a partner with as much devotion to your satisfaction as your own. 
They treated pleasuring you like it was menial drudgery. Not Haechan. Even now, he was ignoring the way his cock twitched between his thighs, aching to be freed. Your pleasure was paramount and he would not rest until he made you come. 
He wanted to be the only one you needed and proved to you every single day that you were destined to be together. And you were content with that. You wondered how on earth you’d finally been lucky enough to find a guy that loved you as much as he loved himself. There was no one else for you, you knew that in your bones. Everything felt meant to be with him. 
Unshakable and intangible. You wouldn’t have it any other way. This was a boy you would die and give your soul for. 
And also wanted to suck the soul out of. 
“Haechan, please. Fuck. Please,” you whimpered meekly, without a shred of idea of what you were even begging for. 
Though Haechan knew. You were simply so predictable to him by now. He learned to recognize when you were near, all of the glaringly obvious signs, given that you were not subtle in the slightest. With you grinding into his mouth, it was no secret you were on the verge of a sweet release. 
Haechan let his fingers pull the weight and clamped his teeth into the core of your thighs, then growled, “Come on, my pretty girl. Let go for me.”
Your dear boyfriend became ruthless at light speed, devouring you whole with his tongue like he wanted to leave not even a crumb of you to remain. His fingers were double kill, strumming you to ecstasy. 
Your body submitted to his commands, because of course it did. Haechan dominated you. Even if you wanted to disobey him, it was your body’s natural choice to comply. Every inch of you was owned by your lover and he had no intention of giving it back. Not that you wanted it. You took delight in handing him the reins. 
You were unstill, shaken with orgasm. There was a sharp tingle, swelling up your spine and closing in all over. It was too much. Your pussy throbbed, kneading his fingers hotly and you gave one final cry of his name before your body caved in to destruction, instantly going limp.  
Though you were overwhelmed, you should have known Haechan was far from finished. Never one to stop at a single orgasm, your boyfriend ate you out until you physically could not take it anymore, making you shudder with unalloyed pleasure over and over and over again. 
And given how long it had been since your boyfriend’s head had been between your thighs, you weren’t necessarily complaining.
Your chest was heaving and you were clinging to whatever remained of your breath for dear life when he eased up. Your most intense orgasms were always due to a combination of your boyfriend’s relentlessness and your extreme pent-up stress or sexual frustration. 
“You screamed a lot,” Haechan said, sucking your arousal off his fingers and wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. 
You fought a tiny smirk. You always loved the way he looked with your arousal coating his plush, pink lips. Instead, you rolled your eyes and retorted through ragged breath, “Fuck you.”
Haechan casted a smug grin and didn’t hesitate to scoff, “I’m sure you want to.”
Damn it. Now you were absorbed in the thought of him fucking you within an inch of your life. “Please… I can’t wait anymore,” you begged, core still aching no matter how many times he pleasured you. He made you insatiable. 
“I could never tell my pretty girl ‘no,’” Haechan crooned, inching in on you to scoop you in his sun-kissed arms. You giggled when he surprised you with a kiss. “I’ll take care of you.”
As always. 
True to his word, your wonderful boyfriend began to shred himself of his clothes. With your voluntary assistance, of course. You gaped open-mouthed at the sight of his thick cock standing at attention against his stomach, lost for words and short of breath.
Never passing up the opportunity to tease you, Haechan chaffed, “Baby, close your mouth. You’ll catch flies.”
Heat wafted over you. Your voice was small, “Haechan…,”
“Shh. I know, baby. I know,” he whispered. 
Your lover kneeled between your thighs and you spread them for him instantly. Haechan smirked at how pliant you were. He never needed to ask, because it was simply second nature for your body to bend to his every will. 
He tapped his cock against your folds, asking, “How rough do you want it?”
“Break me,” you rasped without a second thought. 
Haechan grinned, full of mischief. 
He pushed in nice and slow, never wanting to hurt you. He lowered his head and met his lips to yours, kissing you as if it would distract you from the feeling of being slowly but surely stretched open. “Open up for me,” he hissed, pulse pumping at how tightly you gripped his cock, on the border of something vice-like. 
“You’re so… so big,” you choked out, anchoring yourself in the sheets with your nails. 
“Mm. Yeah?” Haechan asked, the slyest of smiles on his lips. “But you can take it. Isn’t that right, baby?”
You bobbed your head and your mouth parted, passing a soft moan. 
Haechan thought you wrapped around his bare cock too good, too withering and tight. He was sure pleasure of this magnitude only lived between you and him, irreplicable. Even so quickly you were making short work of him, leaving him with shackled self-restraint and half a mind to destroy what was left of you. 
You forwent the condoms roughly half a year into the relationship. Which was two and a half years ago. Though you took birth control pills and had no intention of becoming pregnant any time soon, if you were to have anyone’s baby, you knew it would only be your boyfriend’s. Thoughts of carrying his baby and raising a child together in your home plagued your mind, and you smiled from ear to ear. 
Your boyfriend glanced at you through his lashes and an invisible string tugged his heart at the sight of you. “What’re you smiling about?”
“You,” you said with hesitation. “I love you. And I want to love you forever.”
“Funny thing to say to the guy that’s about to wreck you.”
You rolled your eyes. It would kill him to be serious even for a second. You added, “He’s also the love of my life.”
Haechan softened. Only a little. “I love you, too,” he whispered, touch betraying his affectionate words as his fingers found purchase at the flesh of your hips. 
A grimace painted your face as Haechan sank his nails deeper and deeper. 
From that point on, Haechan fucked you as if he loathed all there was about you, save for your body. He kept a brutal pace, seemingly fucking you fuller and fuller of his cock with every passing push. Over your soft moans, you could hear his hips meeting yours with a loud, resounding thwack, and your cunt gushing hotly. 
Upon his death-grip, your lover’s name dangled from your tongue in dangerously sharp cries, sweet as honey and thick as tar. Your fingers scouted his biceps, desperate for some kind of anchorage. Haechan let out a dangerously low growl and you immediately tightened. For as long as you’d known him, your boyfriend had always been somewhere in the gray area between sadism and masochism. 
When asked about it, he told you, “There’s no such thing as pleasure without pain, baby. A very thin line separates the two.”
As twisted as it sounded, you agreed. 
The bed and your bodies performed in league to fill the void in the cabin, the former creaking with every reverberating slap of the latter meeting together. 
You were unapologetically vocal, but Haechan too sang his praises when balls deep inside you. At first, you were pleasantly surprised by his unabashed responses. Most of the guys you’d been with prior would stifle anything above a throaty groan. But when your body talked to him, he spoke back even louder. 
Your boyfriend never hid his affection for you. You were the reason he breathed everyday and he would let his body tell you as much. 
Haechan clamped his tanned arm around your throat and you whimpered. The chokehold was tight just enough to not harm you, but still have you begging for breath. He gave you nowhere else to look but his dark eyes, gleaming darkly with lust and lust only. 
He was all you could see. More specifically his eyes. Yours were locked there, unable to glance away. The only time they were out of sight was whenever your vision was peeling off at the edges by inevitable darkness. 
Haechan cocked his head a little, observing his creation. You were coming apart at the seams, eyes widened and lips parted, trying to take in oxygen. “Hard enough for you, baby?”
“Harder,” you managed to croak.  
Your boyfriend shook his head and laughed. Though nothing surprised him anymore. You took whatever he gave you with an insatiable kind of greed, as if there was no such thing as enough where he was involved. 
Even when sated, you only kept coming back for more. 
His pace was hard and unabating. A sharp cry split your lips when he bit your neck, nibbling at the flesh as he roughly fucked you into the mattress. You were unstill, a depthless well of ecstasy. Pleasure knew no boundaries. It was too greedy. It took, consumed, and it dominated. 
Haechan was right. There was a thin line between pain and pleasure and you were somewhere in the middle, teetering in between. 
The entire room was scorching. You soaked in the sight of sweat beading at your boyfriend’s forehead and gushed hotly around his cock, limbs locked together like a cluster of vines, hot skin on even hotter skin. Haechan’s grip on your throat slackened to hear you moan clearer when his tongue laced into you instead. 
You sweltered. And were positive that you would die. What a marvelous way to die, you thought humorously. With the love of your life by your side. You would have it no other way. 
Your back arched and you rocked your hips into his, desperate for more heat and friction. Only he could give it to you. 
That was how Haechan could tell you were close and he brought his fingers to your wet sex, strumming your swollen bundle of nerves. He was almost there and he wanted you to finish together. You cried out his name, clasping his biceps. 
“Cum. You know you want to,” Haechan hummed tauntingly. 
Your legs wrapped around his hips to draw him deeper inside. There was something about being at the brink of climax that rendered your entire body weak. Every piece of you was tempted into doing whatever he desired; whatever his heart desired. You wanted to please him. More than anything, you wanted to make him proud.
Haechan clamped his hands around your throat anew and that was all it took to finish you. Your mouth opened, crying his name as you finally crossed the threshold of orgasm. The tingles returned, prickling with the warm, pumping blood through your limbs. 
You gripped his cock and he came in turn, filling you to the brim with warmth with a sweet, high-pitched moan of your name. 
Haechan glanced over at you. He never got enough of the look on your pretty face when you shuddered, still throbbing and milking his cock dry until he eventually stilled inside you. You heaved for breath and his eyes soaked in your whole body, barely fighting a smile as he noticed all of the bruises and marks leftover. 
He never wanted to hurt you, but subconsciously, there was a part of him that found twisted pleasure. It meant you were his. He owned you, but you owned him. Every inch. 
For a while, you both only laid there, smiling and laughing at each other. Then, Haechan swooped you into his arms and muttered into the crook of your neck, “Let’s get you cleaned up.” 
You beamed. “I love you.”
“I love you more,” Haechan replied, pressing the lightest of kisses to your lips. 
“No, I love you more.”
Haechan whined, “Jesus, woman. I love you more, and that’s final.”
The two of you continued to bicker as if you were teenagers in love for the very first time. It reminded you of the early stages of your relationship, stealing and prolonging time before the other had to leave by initiating an “I love you” battle. 
As the years passed, you learned to savor every moment you had together. Time became scarcer by the day. It was not to be had when you were two adults with heavy workloads. 
Your boss made it his mission to call you into work even on weekends. Before he died, at least. That was a couple of weeks ago and needless to say, you were not very disappointed. 
“Rest in hell,” you remembered your co-worker saying. To which you quipped, “No rest for the wicked.”
Haechan crawled back into bed with you after you were both all clean and the two of you fell asleep in each other’s arms. You could hardly remember the last time you had. It was always him after you or vice versa. Never together. 
This haunted campground trip would ironically prove to be a nice oasis in a busy stage of your lives, it seemed. 
A shrill scream penetrated the night and you were jolted awake. 
Haechan wiped at his tired eyes and his voice was thick with sleepiness, “Is that Winter screaming in terror, because of Jay, or was that Ten?” 
You nudged your boyfriend. “No, that’s definitely terror. The last time I heard that sound was when Winter walked in on Yuta taking a piss.”
“They all scream like girls.”
“You scream like a girl.”
Haechan whined, “Whose side are you on?” 
Laughing, you shoved the duvet off your bodies and said, “Come on. Let’s go make sure these woods aren’t actually haunted.”
“Or worse - Yuta didn’t forget to zip the bathroom door,” he quipped. 
You snickered. 
Your boyfriend caged you behind his body, insisting that he wanted you to flee in the presence of any actual danger, and he led you outside the cabin. A shroud of fog hung near the ground. The sky was darker than the last you’d seen, perpetually mistier.
Haechan sauntered over to Yuta with you in convey and asked, “What’s with all the raucous?” 
“Winter’s idea of a spooky Halloween,” Yuta said dryly, hands at his hips. 
Your eyes rose and you saw Winter pointing fingers and snickering at a dismayed Ten, hairs standing on end. You figured he must have been the latest victim of her scares. 
Ten’s chest heaved as he yelled, “You are not funny!” 
Winter stuck her tongue out, eyes gleaming with mischief. “Damn right. I’m hi-fucking-larious.”
Jaehyun walked by, chuckling, and announced with a bag of marshmallows in clutch, “Time for s’mores.” 
At the mention of s’mores, the six of you huddled together around the campfire like children at the distribution of sweet candy. Danger dissuaded none of you. Each of you were intent on treating this as a typical camping trip. Per your boyfriend’s idea, your phones were in a cardboard box in Ten and Yuta’s cabin for safekeeping, there were plenty of outdoor activities to keep you entertained, and you were going to spend the weekend bonding together. 
Chimera, as wicked as it may have been, was eerily beautiful. And its nature was on another level. 
“Calories,” Winter squealed rather fondly, clapping excitedly.
You soured the mood and said, “And cavities.”
Winter shot you a glare and had she not been on the other side of fire, she would have leapt over and nudged you in the elbow. 
Instead, your best friend replied coolly, “Don’t worry. I packed Jay and I’s toothbrushes. I sent a reminder in the group chat, so I hope you guys didn’t forget.” 
“I came extensively prepared,” Ten said, snatching a graham cracker from Jaehyun and shoving it in his mouth. Much to Winter’s amusement and Jaehyun’s chagrin. “I brought toothbrushes, books, water, ear plugs, flashlights…” 
Haechan interrupted, “Ear plugs?”
Ten scoffed, “Oh, yes. You and your girlfriend and Jaehyun and Winter are notorious for going all night. I’d rather die than hear those two getting dicked down.”
“You’re just jealous,” you snapped lightheartedly. 
Ten reached for a marshmallow and defended himself a little too swiftly, “Oh, honey. I get dicked down on the regular, but you guys have fun.”
Yuta leaned into your ear from the right and whispered, “And strapped down by you in his dreams.”
“I heard that,” Ten hissed. 
Yuta played innocent and said, “Heard what?” 
Your boyfriend heard it, too, but he only pressed a sweet kiss to the corner of your lips, rubbing it in Ten’s face. 
For his comfort, the topic changed.
The treats began to cook at long last. Haechan made you a s’more, seeing as you were a camping amateur, and you merely watched with fondness twinkling in your eyes. You were so out of your mind in love with your boyfriend that even the simplest of gestures made your heart swell with warmth. 
For the second s’more, Haechan guided you. You stuffed a marshmallow on the tip of a roasting stick and he held your hands in his as you held it over the fire. “Not too close. You don’t want it to catch on fire,” were his words, a certain concentration in his eyes tempting your heart to leap into the wavering flames. 
Ensuing was a treat of chocolatey goodness. 
Your friends were laughing and telling jokes over the campfire and somehow you became so engrossed in the conversation that you didn’t notice your third marshmallow was burning until it was too late. “I burned my marshmallow,” you announced with a frown. 
Yuta had finished up with his, but out of the kindness of his heart, offered to switch. “Have mine,” he insisted. 
“You’re too kind. Thank you,” you replied, appreciative. 
Then, you glanced over to your boyfriend, though he was still chattering with the rest of your friends. For a second, you thought it went unnoticed, but he laced his fingers through yours without a word and that was the end. 
You smiled. He was nothing like any of your past lovers. They were over-possessive and controlling, demanding your constant and undivided attention. Haechan, at worst, was a little clingy. 
He never got jealous over tiny, harmless gestures. The bar was so goddamn low, but finally having a normal guy made you prone to constant comparisons. He was totally chill when you were in the company of male friends and the only time he ever got upset was when you were hurt. 
Which was completely understandable. Instead of seeing you as an object to own, it represented his genuine respect and care for you. 
He’s the one, you thought with a stupid smile on your face. Even your parents agreed and were already calling him their son-in-law. Most people you dated prior didn’t even make it past the front lawn of their house. 
“Did you guys know that Chimera is actually named after a Greek mythical creature?” Ten asked, ever the bookworm. 
Jaehyun insincerely sneered, “Nerd.”
Ten ignored him with a roll of his eyes and continued, “In Greek mythology, the Chimera were fire-breathing creatures that appeared as a lion with a goat head on its back, and a snake for a tail.”
Haechan asked curiously, “Isn’t it also genetic mutations?”
“In biology, yes,” Ten said matter-of-factly. “It refers to organisms with several different genetic complications or DNA molecules with sequences from different organisms done by laboratories.”
“Wow. What a way to take us back to high school,” Yuta teased. 
You shook your head, intrigued. “No, no. I’m interested. Ten, continue.”
Ten flushed a little and his voice was quieter when he added, “Chimera also means a creature of the imagination. It’s something you dream of, but it’s a tantalizing, unattainable desire.”
Winter chimed in, “I’ve heard stories about Chimera. These woods particularly.”
“Me, too,” Jaehyun said. “The gruesome deaths, the questionable suicides. No wonder nobody wants to come out here, as beautiful as it is.”
You retorted, “Then, what does that make the six of us?”
They laughed. 
“I heard a girl killed herself in these very woods,” Yuta said, voice low over the crackling sound of fire. “But rumor has it she was actually slaughtered.”
“In the early nineteen-eighties. I remember,” Ten replied, slightly unnerved. 
Haechan snickered. “You weren’t even born yet.”
“I read a lot.”
That was obvious. 
Winter whispered eerily, “They say that sometimes you can still hear her footsteps dragging across the dirt, lurking in the night’s darkness.” 
Perfectly on cue, there was an eerie sound from the woods and you couldn’t convince yourself that you were the only one to hear it because each of your heads whipped around all at once. Haechan instinctively coiled an arm around you, prepared to protect you even against the soul of a girl that killed herself forty years ago if he could. 
Or maybe she really didn’t commit suicide. Maybe her killer painted her death as a suicide and now she was seeking revenge on humankind for not seizing the murderer. 
You immediately scolded yourself for being so silly. There was no such thing as ghosts or monsters. You believed in one evil and it was the human race. It’s probably just a squirrel or something, you reassured yourself. A squirrel with painfully inconvenient timing. 
Glancing between your boyfriend, Jaehyun, Ten, and Yuta, you said, “And what the hell are the four of you sitting around for? You’re the men! Go investigate.”
Ten was purely dismayed by the mere thought. “And because I’m a man I should be sacrificed to the devil? Absolutely not. This is how people die in horror movies. They go around poking their nose into places they have no business when they should be running for their lives.”
“Let’s go together,” Haechan said, throwing you all assertive glances. 
There was some reluctance, but you all begrudgingly agreed. As they say, no man left behind. Haechan still kept you flush to his chest, as did Jaehyun with Winter. He had his burly arms coiled above her hips. 
“There’s no girl in the woods,” Yuta murmured under his breath. But you heard him through the thick, strained silence. 
Jaehyun quipped, “Who knows. Maybe there’s one for you and you’ll stop showing my girlfriend your penis.”
Yuta retorted, “She’s the one that walks in on me. Maybe your girlfriend wants to see my penis.”
“Please be quiet,” Winter whined. 
Jaehyun, on a mission to be the world’s greatest boyfriend (and a few places behind, in your biased opinion), silenced himself on command and tightened his clasp below her ribs. He wasn’t all too convinced that there was a ghost in the woods, but he wanted to ease her. It was far more likely that you were all overthinking the sound of some animal minding its business. 
Your boyfriend had the exact same idea and held you even tighter. Whenever in the face of danger, his first instinct was - and would always be - to protect you. Only over his dead body would he allow harm to come your way. 
But even in his soothing embrace there was still a sinister energy that plagued you, alerting you that there was something amiss here. Fog blurred your vision and darkness wore at it, making it difficult to see clearly. 
Ten was prepared as always and turned on one of those flashlights he had mentioned earlier. He handed it to your boyfriend, the one currently leading your pack of six. 
Ever courageous, he led each of you through the night’s wilderness, your pulse thumping in your body the entire time. For whatever reason, the fear in you was unshakable. You had no clue where it emerged from, but it completely unnerved you. 
A sound of twigs snapping stunned you all and Haechan shone the light at a tree where the noise seemed to come from, just quick enough to see a squirrel scurrying up a tree trunk. As far as any of you could tell, it was the same tree the first noise sounded from. Haechan assuringly declared, “It was just a squirrel.”
Your breaths came easier. Exactly what you suspected, but it would never hurt to be one-hundred percent sure. Though even with that burden off your shoulders, unease still penetrated you. 
Jaehyun, Yuta, and your boyfriend seemed fearless, while Ten and Winter were relieved that they’d been frightened over nothing. But you were still not entirely convinced. 
Was it only you? 
The rumors and spooky stories are getting to my head. That’s all, you consoled yourself. You’re in apparently haunted woods. Woods alone are scary enough, haunted or not. And this is your first time. Fear is natural. 
Each of you turned around and headed back to the campfire you hadn’t dared strayed too far from and sensing your unease from a mile away, Haechan pressed a kiss to your cheek. “Don’t be scared, baby girl. If any monster pops out, it will have to get through me before it hurts you,” he whispered softly in your ears. 
“I don’t want you to get hurt, either,” you huffed, voice muffled as you put your head in your boyfriend’s chest. 
“Don’t worry about me,” he told you sweetly. “I’ve been told I resemble a bear. The worst-case scenario is one attacks the trashcan and I have to communicate with it to discourage it.”
“And what if it’s a wolf?” 
Haechan tightened his hold on you, purring, “Well, I’ve also been told I’m big and bad.”
You snickered. Leave it to your wonderful boyfriend to melt your worries away with his equally brilliant humor. He made you forget why you had even been so scared in the first place, all by kissing you and making you laugh. 
The six of you decided you’d had your fill of spooky stories for one night and retired to your cabins for bed. You heard more than a couple of noises from the cabin across from you - Jaehyun and Winter’s - and promptly wished you would have also had the brilliant idea of bringing some noise-cancellation headphones. 
Fortunately for you, your boyfriend was a self-proclaimed genius (and maybe once or twice you fed his ego and agreed), and had an even better idea. He fucked you so hard that you tuned out the rest of the world, unable to hear anything over both of your own moans. 
In the morning, you woke up and took your time to crawl out of bed. Haechan had worn you out and you could still feel the soreness in your thighs from the night before. Not to mention the gentle morning sex you dreamed of, moans soft over the sound of birds tweeting quietly. 
It was closer to afternoon when you finally went outside and got some sunlight. Everyone was in their own atmosphere. You ate breakfast and listened to mother nature for a while. 
There was a lake walking distance from the campground and one of the boys called out your name, boarding two three-person canoes. You recognized the voice as Jaehyun’s and he asked, “Wanna go canoeing with us?”
You mulled it over, but noticing Ten’s eyes on you was all the discouragement you needed. Each of the four boys were aboard, including your boyfriend. Ten was as dear a friend to you as the other two, but that was it. No part of you wanted to make things even more awkward and strained in the friendship than they already were. 
Though you and Haechan may not have dropped any comments, Ten’s lingering eyes were definitely not lost on either of you. Besides, being with a bunch of guys was not your idea of a vacation well-spent. You refused to leave Winter alone at a potentially haunted campground. 
For that reason, you had a feeling that Jaehyun was only asking to tease Ten, but you declined the offer nonetheless and said sweetly, “I’m good. I’ll stay and keep Winter company. You guys have some brotherly bonding time.”
The boys told you to have fun and you bid them likewise. 
You immediately scouted Winter afterwards and found her taking pictures of wildflowers. Unnoticed, you decided to slowly creep towards her, but your fun was ruined when she said without turning around, “I know you’re there. You can’t beat the master at her own game.”
You frowned.
Winter turned around, smirking at the fact that she’d caught you with your trousers down. “What’s up, bestie?”
You flopped against a blanket she’d sprawled across the ground. “Do you think Ten likes me?” you asked, fidgeting. 
“As more than a friend? Definitely,” your best friend said, coming to join you. “Jaehyun told me the boys are going canoeing. I can only hope Haechan doesn’t try to drown him.”
You knew she was only being funny, but the thought made you shiver. Of course, you knew your boyfriend well and he would never. The trust you had in each other was all needed to comfort him and to know that you were all his was more than enough. 
He could be possessive, but not over-possessive. He liked to stake his claim to you, holding you and kissing you in front of people so they knew you were his, and leaving visible marks on your neck in  your alone time for the same purpose. He never demanded your complete attention, as much as he adored being in the center. 
Tiny gestures never made him feel bitter. You had no painful memories of your boyfriend’s jealousy. The opposite, rather. He fucked you extra hard until he felt better. 
You fought a smirk. At worst, he was a little meaner than usual. But damn it did you like it when he was mean and rough. 
You defended your boyfriend and said, “My boyfriend is an angel. He doesn’t get jealous.”
“Your boyfriend is a Gemini. Duh, he gets jealous,” Winter argued teasingly, seeing dead through you. A silent understanding passed between you. She liked the jealousy sex, too. “He was so mad at me yesterday.”
“That’s because he was angry. Not jealous. You hurt me and he hates when I’m hurt.” 
“Whatever,” your best friend replied, fondling with her camera that Jaehyun bought her for her birthday this January. “Wouldn’t it be funny if I reviewed the pictures and I saw a ghost?”
You grimaced. “That’s one way to put it. For sure.”
“Okay, maybe not funny. But I don’t think these woods are haunted. I believe the stories about the suicides and murders, but evil spirits? That’s a humongous stretch.”
Never mind yesterday’s confidence. Now, you only shuddered. Though you wanted to agree, there was something about these woods that rubbed you the completely wrong way. And it wasn’t only the tales of ghosts. There was an intangible kind of fear ready to consume you. No matter how badly you wanted to, you couldn’t put your finger on where it stemmed from. 
That was unnerving to you. Only the weekend before, you were more than excited. There was no telling what traps laid waiting in Chimera, much less its woods, which made you all the more determined to unravel its mystery. 
Now, you wanted to leave the knots as tangled as they’d been discovered. 
“I guess,” you told Winter. If she thought nothing of the environment, then there was a chance you were overthinking it all. 
Winter heaved a pleased sigh. “It’s hard to imagine anyone could taint such a beautiful place with blood,” she said, gesturing around to Mother Nature’s handiwork.
 “That sounded strangely poetic,” you replied, feeling as if you were in some sort of murder mystery novel. 
Winter snickered. “As my favorite writer once said, ‘believe nothing you hear, and only one half that you see.’”
You gave your best friend a look and asked expectantly, “And what does Edgar Allan Poe have to do with anything?”
“Nothing.” Winter shrugged her shoulders. “I just found it fitting.” 
You laughed a little. In spite of its reputation, Chimera was by far one of the most beautiful places you had ever seen. Unsurprisingly, however, that alone wasn’t enough to attract tourists. When you checked the campground website, you ironically noticed they used its hauntedness as promotion to lure campers. 
Clearly, it was working. 
You found it interesting that Chimera was predominantly grass and trees. There were some signs of civilization, as you’d notice on the way to the campground, though mainly towards the center. Areas placed on the periphery of the town were especially rural. 
For instance, the woods. Wildflowers consumed your vision and you understood why Winter was at peace here. You bit your lip. You didn’t want to be a buzz kill, but asked quietly, “Do you ever get the feeling that something you fear is hiding in plain sight?”
Winter nudged you gently. “What do you mean?” 
“It’s just… I don’t know,” you exhaled frustratedly. “Something about this place keeps me on my toes.” 
“Do you think that girl was killed here?” 
You shrugged, trying to feign some semblance of nonchalance. “I think it would be easy to kill anybody here and get away with it. Think about it. There’s a lot of empty land to cover. Easier to live off the grid. You could be abducted from the mainland and no one would ever find you.”
“Okay, you’re thinking too hard,” Winter quipped with a wince. “I get why you’re scared, babe. But I also think you’re supposed to feel that way. For obvious reasons. What you need is a little distraction.”
That made you well with curiosity. “Like what?”
The second the boys were back from canoeing you and your best friend made a beeline to boyfriends, as if you couldn’t wait another. Winter had insisted only moments ago that good dick was all the distraction you needed and as badly as you wanted to make a spiteful argument, you had none to offer. 
But you also wanted to simply talk to Haechan for a while. Not only was he a lover, but a friend wrapped into one. Your boyfriend had a natural ability to abate your fears, but he was also someone that would listen to them and help you wrap your head around them.
You fought a snicker at how badly that made him sound like a therapist. After this trip, you had a feeling you might’ve needed one. 
Haechan sensed there was something off even from the other side of the lake and coiled an arm around below your ribs as soon as he got a chance, asking, “What’s wrong?”
Your eyes flickered. “How’d you know?”
“Gut feeling,” Haechan said with a shrug. “I know when my baby’s suffering. Talk to me.” 
Your heart promptly ricocheted against your ribcage. You glanced around. Jaehyun and Winter had already snuck off to their cabin for some loving while Yuta and Ten were chattering about whatever, but you still were in need of some privacy. 
You slithered into his arms and murmured, “I wanna be alone. With you.”
“There’s a nice little two-mile trail over here. Takes you around and back from over that way. We could shortcut it and be back in about thirty minutes or take the long way and come back in about sixty.”
“Let’s do it,” you said, gesturing for him to lead the way. 
Going deeper into the forbidden woods was not your idea of resolving your fears, but the marvelous landscape gave you little room for complaints. Plus, being there with your boyfriend was almost romantic. 
There was something about all this beauty that made you fear what was cloaked beneath. 
Haechan was very patient with you and for a while you both walked in silence, absorbing your surroundings until he said, “Ready to tell me what’s on your mind?”
“I don’t know what it is, really. But this place gives me the creeps and I can’t explain why. It just does.” 
“It’s not just the reputation, is it?” Haechan asked, seeing right through you. 
It was almost scary how perfectly Haechan could piece you together. Nobody had you more figured out than he did. “You read me so well,” you murmured. 
Haechan chuckled. “I call it the fear of the unknown. You don’t know what’s out there, so anything could be out there. The shit we fear is often the same shit we can’t control, and that’s why it scares us.”
“Does the unknown scare you?” 
“No,” Haechan said, but draped an arm over you as a reminder you weren’t alone. “I like unpredictability. Anything could happen. But I understand why it terrifies some people.”
You teased, “Then, what are you afraid of?”
Your boyfriend’s tone and response in general was a hell of a lot more sober than you were expecting, “Stagnation and routine. I hate being confined to patterns. You already know that, though.”
That you did. Haechan mentioned he was considering switching jobs solely because he wanted more flexibility in life. The pay was nice and so was the insurance and paid vacations, but something had to give. 
You supported him wholeheartedly, of course. Haechan never minded change and would have no problem adjusting, plus only having weekends (and scarce vacations) to each other was a ginormous test of your patience. He wanted more out of life. If he couldn’t spend it with you, then he saw little point. 
“Is that all?” you pressed. He was brave, but not fearless. The reminder was very warm to you. And strangely comforting. 
Haechan said without hesitation, “And losing you because of them.”
Damn it. Now, your heart was racing. It was no question how your boyfriend managed to sweep you off your feet. He was full of endless charm and sincerity. There was a kind of passion to him about you that was undeniable and never questionable. 
You abandoned your self-restraint at the campground and rose off the heels of your shoes, meeting your lips to his. He had to be out of his goddamn mind if he thought he would lose you any time soon. There was no way in hell you would be capable of replacing him. In a world without your boyfriend, you would rather die lonely. 
There was also something about learning your boyfriend’s fears that took the edge off your own. Maybe whatever they were rooted in was much simpler. This place spooked you because of the reputation attached. That was all. 
And now that you were making out with your boyfriend, his heavy hands on your hips, you really couldn’t have given less of a damn about these woods. 
He had the same idea and pulled you over by a tree. For a second, you clung onto your mind long enough to wonder what in the hell you were doing. Then, you lost it just as quickly. There was nothing but trees and plants out here. And maybe a couple of animals that would soon be traumatized. With the coast clear, you were welcome to be as reckless as you liked. 
Haechan instructed, “Knees.” 
You wasted absolutely no time in scrambling to your knees, what was left of your mind too warped to give a damn about the twigs crunching beneath your kneecaps. As always, you wanted to pleasure him and make him proud. Whatever the price may have been, you’d gladly pay it. No matter the sacrifice. 
Your boyfriend was amused, though not at all surprised when you hurriedly reached for his pants, tugging them down before he got the chance to give the order. You wanted to taste that big dick down your throat. 
There was something about Haechan’s size that made your mouth water and gape, ripe and ready, though also left you clenching around nothing at all. Obviously, you’d seen it a number of times before, but the element of surprise was a constant, non-changing factor. Damn it, you would never get tired of his cock. 
Haechan noticed the dazed look in your eyes and smirked. He tapped his cock against your lips and said, “Do you got it, or do you want me to fuck your throat?” 
“I’m going to suck the soul out of you,” you said with an unwavering kind of confidence. 
Haechan gave a snicker. He fisted your hair behind your head and you swiftly got to work, wasting not another second to swirl your tongue around the base of his cock. You liked riling him up, liked taking your time to draw him between your lips and you knew your boyfriend liked it, too. No matter how much he bitched and whined.
“Fuck,” Haechan whined when your tongue teased the tip. He was hard as bricks, which took pretty much nothing to happen whenever you were involved. 
You took his noises with delight, doing your best to ignore the tireless thumping between your plush thighs. As a distraction, you finally drew him inside your mouth, steadily swallowing him inch by damn inch as a measure to prevent yourself from gagging. Your cheeks were hollowed, breath entering through your nose. 
Haechan’s grip on your hair tightened as he hissed, a telltale sign you were doing something very right. Your mouth was so unfathomably darn warm around his size that he was beginning to lose his mind, but to be frank, he lost it the very same day he met you. 
A part of him used to hope that you would give it back, but insanity was a close friend of his now. Or maybe it was the dormant monster living eternally inside him, roused by you for whatever reason. And it was ravenously hungry. 
A kind of greed came over and dominated you, possessing you to suck him like you genuinely intended to suck the soul out of him. As many times as you’d done it before, there could only be so much of his soul still there, though not pleasure. Pleasure was forever and always. “Just like that,” Haechan moaned, basking in the heat of your tongue pressed to his cock. 
His praises only spurred you on. There was nothing you liked more than knowing how good you could make your boyfriend feel. Between the two of you lay a ride-or-die bond that nobody else would ever fathom. Even you somehow couldn’t comprehend how or why he drove you so crazy. You only knew you would do unspeakable things to please your boyfriend and sucking him off in the woods was far from the most bizarre thing on the list of shit you were willing to do. 
You made eye contact with a traumatized rabbit for a whole second and it was all you could do to keep yourself from laughing and spoiling the mood. You gripped the base of Haechan’s cock, sucking him and stroking him all the while. 
None of this should’ve had you dripping the way it did, but you could feel yourself only getting even wetter. You gagged a couple of times (with his size, it was inevitable) but never stopped, a sting of tears in your eyes forming out of twisted pleasure. 
Haechan liked looking down and seeing you on your knees way too much, his dick in your mouth and your tear-stained face glancing back up at him. Fuck, you knew what it did to him when you looked at him like that. 
Like a pretty little thing warped completely by him. 
“I’m gonna cum,” Haechan said, tugging your hair. You hissed, but as he once said, there was no pleasure without pain. Nowhere did you say you didn’t get a thrill out of the sting. “Shit, baby. Are you gonna take it?”
You bobbed your head, humming around him and having a laugh smothered when he promptly made a noise of pleasure. He always wanted to last longer, but you made short work of him. A weakness if he knew one. 
Noting that he was close to his peak, you pulled out all the stops to bring him to sweet release as quickly as possible. You loved witnessing your boyfriend disentangle, loved when he was running on empty without an inch of self-control. Haechan was at his worst here, rutting against your mouth to meet your pace with a roughness that never ceased to make you gag. 
He was fucking your throat nice and hard, pulling your hair to use as he so pleased until the pleasure became so great that he couldn’t hold back anymore, a wave of warm cum painting your tongue. He never stopped fucking your mouth until his orgasm passed completely, high-pitched moans making you pulse rapidly. You swallowed as much as you could, not wanting to dirty your clothes and leave evidence of your lewd behavior. 
Haechan pulled out eventually, chest undulating as he recovered from his orgasm, though he never forgot to ask, “You good?”
You nodded, wiping saliva from your mouth with the back of your hand. 
“I hope you’re ready to get fucked,” Haechan said, helping you to your feet. Which made you snicker. If fucking in the woods was crazy, you were both out of your goddamn mind in love. 
You moaned when Haechan kissed you again and you grabbed his cock in your palms, stroking him hard anew all the while. The longer you waited, the less you could ignore the fire igniting between your thighs that ached to be taken care of. 
Haechan shoved you against the tree after a while and didn’t bother to slide your panties down, only slipping them to the side, courtesy of your skirt. Your palms dug into rough bark and he instead cuffed your wrists in his own hand, tightening them at your backside. He steered his cock to your entrance with the other, your arousal making it all too easy to skid right inside. 
Your moans were instantaneous. Haechan stroked deeper and deeper until every inch was utterly nested inside your sweet cunt, his cock disappearing inside. He took pleasure in stretching you open, because even after fucking you time and time again, your cunt never seemed to get any less tight. He always had to coax his way inside, no matter how wet you were. 
“Haechan,” you stammered, mouth hanging wide open with moans of his name. 
As much as he liked hearing you moan his name, Haechan clamped his palm over your mouth, smothering your sounds while still keeping your arms locked behind your back. 
Though you and your boyfriend had admittedly had sex in a number of places, some debatably strange, the middle of the haunted woods undoubtedly took the cake. The view was nice. You had to admit that it was somewhat romantic being fucked by your boyfriend against a tree while staring at an array of vibrant plants and pretty skies. And being out in the open aroused you a little more than it should have. 
Your body shuddered when he released your wrists to cup a palmful of your breasts, slipping his hand beneath your shirt and his finger kneading your nipple. “You’re so beautiful like this,” Haechan exhaled. Even now, he sometimes struggled to comprehend that he could call someone as beautiful as you were his, but he would be damned if he let anyone snatch away his girl. 
You listened contentedly to the sound of Haechan’s low groans of pleasure and sticks being crumbled beneath your toes as he pounded into you roughly, your fingernails finding purchase in the tree’s gnarled surface. All you could do was whimper, rooted in place and left to take all he gave you. 
Haechan hit a deep spot and you cried into his palm, a weakness making your head spin with dizziness. He simply had a power over you, goddamn it. Your body could never get enough, a depthless well of lust and arousal in the face of your boyfriend. 
As if he could hear whatever your muffled voice said in the crook of his palm, Haechan’s pace quickened, fucking you tirelessly with a passion that could never be sated. You wallowed in the sound of his hips slamming into yours with a sharp, wet slap. There was no denying what was happening if anyone made the unfortunate mistake of walking by.
Fortunately, your only company were harmless animals and possibly a couple of wandering ghosts. 
The harder you were fucked, the harder it was to stand on your own. Haechan took and took from your body but left a crushing kind of pleasure that rendered you weak and another indescribable feeling, smothering you with the unknown sensation. But instead of fear, it aroused a dangerous curiosity within you. 
“So good for me,” Haechan moaned, draping his lips over your already mark-stained neck. Your entire body was nearly coated in dark bruises ensuing after a long session of fucking and sucking and love-making. “You always gotta feel so damn good.”
His palm slacked on your mouth and you whimpered, “Baby, too much.”
Haechan slowed himself for a second and asked, “Do you want me to stop?”
You shook your head and ironically whimpered at his slower pace. God, no. You wanted Haechan to fuck you numb. 
He snickered and picked back up his quickened rhythm. “That’s my girl,” he praised, pressing a kiss to the side of your neck. “Take it for me, baby.”
Never had your body ever felt so stimulated and alive, every muscle taut with pleasure. It was a lot, but you took it like a champ, loving the way your boyfriend’s thick girth filled you up, hard and stiff. Fire set you ablaze, heat igniting at the vortex of your thighs and shooting through you like a bundle of fireworks. You were smothered by heat, scorching all over. 
Your bodies were on autopilot, sweat beading at the surface of your skin and making your clothes adhere. You were sticky with sweat and arousal and eventually bits of Haechan’s cum, the part you were most excited for. The thought of your boyfriend emptying his balls into you alone was more than enough to make your walls clamp around his cock, wanting to literally milk him dry. You moaned in anticipation. 
“Want you to cum,” you whimpered, body thumped forward with every heavy thrust inside you. “Baby, please. I wanna make you cum.”
Haechan bit his lip when he heard you beg. Why did you have to be so damn sexy? It was the perfect way to bring him over the edge. “Gotta take care of my girl first, baby,” he whispered sweetly in your ear. 
As soon as those words escaped his mouth, you finally noticed how close you were, body under pressure and ready to snap. You could hardly even stand upright on your own, knees very liable to giving in (and more sore than you could notice over numbing pleasure). You were prepared to be broken beyond reclaim. 
“Baby, I…”
“I know,” Haechan shushed you with a sweet peck to your cheek. “I’ve got you, baby. I’m right here. Let go.”
That was all you needed to hear before you couldn’t fight release anymore and it toppled over, draping over you in totality. You came so hard that tears began to well from your eyes, your hands desperately clinging to the tree bark, bruises ready to form all over. Haechan brought his palm back over your mouth quick enough to smother a prolonged, sated scream. 
He whispered praises in your ear even your body slackened, limp against the tree but still letting him use you as needed. You were trembling with anticipation, restless as you waited for him to fill you to the brim. “Baby, please,” you begged. “Fill me up. Fill me up...,”
Haechan developed a ruthless pace now, absorbed in your desperate chants and the way your pussy pulsed around his cock, endeavoring to trigger his climax. He was tangled in the heat of you, dangerously close and gripping your hips so harshly you whined, “Fuck,” into his palm. 
Soon enough, listening to the sound of your sweet voice and muffled cries got the best of him and Haechan’s hips stilled inside, cock twitching with orgasm and promptly releasing hotly inside you. He gave a long hiss while you sighed pleasantly, satisfied at long last. 
Your boyfriend cleaned you up while you rested against the tree, feeling lightheaded. He ensured your skirt was in place and brushed off tiny specks of dirt that had clung to your knees. Haechan, as always, was restless, but you were still trying to catch your breath from the hell of a nut that he had only now given you. 
And you could feel his release still warm between your thighs, caught in your panties. 
You were as fucked out as you looked and he wallowed in the darkly arousing sight of you, evidence of what happened etched across your face no matter the length you went to hide. 
Haechan fought a sly grin and asked, “Ready?” 
You nodded. But when you went to walk, you reeled. Tomorrow was Sunday and that morning you would be kissing these woods goodbye, but you had a feeling your boyfriend would leave you too sore to work come Monday. 
Not that you were complaining. You could only wonder if that was part of his master plan. 
“Disgusting,” Winter sneered lightheartedly when she noticed you limping back to the campground. 
You rolled your eyes. “Oh, please. I’m sure you and Jaehyun gave the boys a lot to raise hell about while we were gone.” 
Jaehyun, directly beside his girlfriend, pulled her into his arms and said, “Hey, it’s not my baby’s fault she’s loud.”
Winter hummed in agreement. “Right. It’s his.”
“Who’s disgusting now,” you remarked with a playful grimace. 
Haechan - for once in his entire life - was silent, too focused on helping you to a shower. He only chuckled a little and ushered you away to take good care of you.
You felt a hell of a lot more refreshed once you cleaned up and had a change of clothes, though ironically energetic. When in need of a nap, Haechan  fucking the shit out of you plus a nice bath usually did the trick (although the bathroom luxuries were limited outdoors), but somehow you were given a burst of energy. 
Though not too long ago you were spooked by what lay in hiding in these woods, there was now a rain cloud of dread and sadness hanging over you when you realized this trip would be ending all too soon. You were having way too much fun in the company of your friends and boyfriend. The last thing you wanted was for it to end.
This place was growing on you. And now that it had, it was almost time to leave. The goddamn irony. 
You stepped outside. Jaehyun and your boyfriend were firing up the grill and Yuta was talking to a squirrel (you would rather not ask), meanwhile Winter was strangely nowhere to be seen. But Ten was at the empty campfire, spectacles sitting on the bridge of his nose as he flipped pages of a rather thick novel. 
You chuckled. It was almost endearing. Some things never changed. 
Your contemplative face was on. The conversation would have to be had one way or another. That much you knew. Your options were clear, though dull. Either address the elephant in the room, or create a rift in your relationship with willful ignorance. 
So, you hauled ass right over to that campfire. 
Ten was startled by your sudden presence and given the circumstances, he was prepared to give someone an earful over the unannounced interruption, but swiftly silenced himself when he noticed it was you who’d come to his side. 
You winced when you noticed his jumpy reaction. “Sorry. Did I scare you?” 
“No,” Ten lied and put his book face down. “What’s up?”
“Nothing. I just wanted to talk.”
That kindled his interest. “Oh?”
“Yeah,” you replied nonchalantly. “What are you reading?”
“This book about the cycle of darkness and light. It’s in German. It’s about how the light replenishes what the darkness steals, but the darkness will always undo it again regardless.”
That genuinely piqued your curiosity. “Sounds deep.”
“Oh, yes. There are plenty of figurative details about hope and hiding your quote-unquote darkness to other people. The author likens human beings to the moon. We all have a dark side, but other people only see the lit part of us,” Ten said, and you beamed at his enthusiasm. “The part we want them to see.”
You leaned over to notice the novel was indeed in German. And impressed that he could comprehend it nonetheless. “Do you have a hidden dark side?”
“‘We are so accustomed to disguise ourselves to others, that in the end, we become disguised to ourselves.’”
“François de La Rochefoucauld,” you replied, recognizing the quote. 
Ten stared at you, wide-eyed. “You know?” 
You nodded with a smile. “He also said, ‘true love is like ghosts, which everybody talks about and few have seen.’”
Ten went dangerously silent and you knew you’d struck a sore spot, but you weren’t done applying pressure. 
You continued, “You’re a really good friend, Ten. And a great guy.”
“Don’t.” 
You cocked your head. “Don’t do what?” 
“Don’t be nice! Don’t be you,” Ten whispered frustratedly, standing to his feet. Which you did suit. “Do you know you’re the only person in this world who’s never laughed at me?”
It was your turn to be quiet now. Tension had a heavy hand clamped over your mouth. 
“You’ve never mocked me. Never made fun of me. The only time you’ve made me feel less than someone else is when you and Haechan got together. Even then, none of it was your fault.”
Grabbing his hand, you crooned, “I’m sorry.” 
That only exasperated Ten even more and he swatted your hand away, though careful not to hurt you, and hurriedly scooped his things into his arms. “Just stop. Don’t let me down gently. You’ll only make it harder on me.”
Ten stormed off before you could get another word in and you merely stood there, riveted in place. You glanced around and were relieved that nobody seemed to notice, but a sour sensation broiled in your gut as you wondered if you’d only rubbed salt in all the wrong wounds. 
For fuck’s sake. Maybe it would have been a better idea to wait until you’d left the campground. At least then you wouldn’t have potentially ruined his whole trip. 
Jaehyun passed out hotdogs as they were coming off the grill and everyone gathered together for an early dinner, but Ten was still nowhere to be seen. Yuta came to their shared cabin and offered him food, but he denied it, sulking all alone. 
“I mean, shit. What did you do to him?” Yuta asked you once he returned. 
You gave him a hard glare and ignored the question. “You guys should be nicer to Ten. He’s a little sensitive right now,” you scolded, then turned to face your boyfriend who was sitting directly next to you. “You, too.”
Haechan threw his hands up. “Yes, ma’am.”
You gave a prolonged exhale. It was no secret Ten had a mean crush on you, though you had denied it for as long as possible. Now that you’d confronted the issue at hand, it blew up in your face. For that reason, there was another unsettling feeling coming alive in the pit of your stomach, making your skin crawl. 
But this time, you knew why. Ironically, you couldn’t tell if that was worse. 
Nothing else was seemingly out of place and the evening carried on as usual, but you were definitely on edge. The shorter days meant an earlier sunset and by the time the sky dimmed pitch-black, most of the others had retreated to their respective cabins, in favor of escaping the approaching threat of bloodthirsty mosquitoes. 
Except for you and your boyfriend, who approached you carrying two glasses of champagne and handing you one.
You accepted the glass and gave him a look. “And what are we celebrating?”
“Making it through the weekend. Alive,” Haechan joked, taking a seat next to you. 
“Mm. You know what champagne does to me.”
He nodded, like that was the whole point. “Yeah. I expect your hands to be all over me in five minutes tops.”
You snickered and sipped from your glass quietly. Haechan placed a cool hand on your thigh, a stark contrast from the raging heat of the campfire crackling merely inches away from you. The sensation was very welcome. 
There was no one around save for you, your boyfriend, and a large number of still trees. Haechan was usually full of conversation, but he was too preoccupied in drawing circles on your bare thighs, caught in how much he loved them. You smiled slyly. The feeling was mutual. Your boyfriend had some thick ass thighs.
Then, your thoughts were dark, and you frowned at the reminder of the terrible dread reeling like a vortex in your belly. “Ten likes me.”
“No offense, baby. But I think you were the last person to figure that out.”
You frowned. “I think I always knew, but I didn’t want to accept it. Because I value the friendship him and I have and I didn’t want that bond to be broken. I still can’t really believe he has feelings for me.”
“I don’t see what’s so surprising,” Haechan said, glancing up from your thighs to look you plain in the eye. “You’re a likable person, babe. I say the guy has taste. Too bad you’re already mine.”
Your lover more or less played compassionate, but you could tell he didn’t actually feel too bad about the situation. Or much of anything for that matter. Funnily enough, that kindled a kind of uncertainty in you. “Doesn’t it make you angry?” you asked curiously, threading your fingers through his bright head of hair.
“No.”
“Why not?”
“Why would it? I already know you’re all mine,” Haechan reasoned. “I don’t need any affirmation because I know I own your mind, body, and soul. It’s like I have you under a spell.”
Maybe the champagne had you under a spell, because you swore he looked even better than normal, skin glimmering courtesy of the crackling fire. You could see an identical inferno irate in his pretty brown eyes, blood-hungry and spiraling alarmingly out of control. You knew damn well you were playing with fire, but for whatever reason, you were dangerously in love with the burn. 
Your lover’s lips attacked you and you submitted to his touch, within the firing line of danger. Your hands found his body promptly, desperate for warmth, and Haechan smirked because he had predicted as much. 
He could never scare you. The more you uncovered about him, the deeper you fell into some depthless pile of doom. 
Haechan coiled one arm around your backside while the other skirted between your thighs, grabbing a feel of your clothed arousal. You moaned, already getting wetter. “You do realize this is our third time today alone?” 
“What can I say? I’m addicted to you,” Haechan said, kneading between your thighs and watching your lips fall with a pleased exhale. 
You kept touching and sucking each other until Haechan inevitably got a little too riled up hearing your sweet moans and gently pressed you against the thick log, a blanket already draped above. Strangely, time seemed to move slower, like the whole world was frozen over and there was no one else there. Nobody to interrupt your reckless fun. 
A tinge of heat blossomed inside your chest, rapidly spreading elsewhere when your boyfriend plucked your shirt and bra and started to kiss his way down your breasts. You clasped your palms on his shoulders, soft little sighs still doing a number on him as he nibbled at your flesh, cock growing harder. 
Just thinking about all the many times Haechan fucked you into oblivion had you in a drunken stupor and you begged demurely, “Please, baby.” There was nothing you weren’t willing to do if it meant he would stop drawing out the inevitable, no matter how good his kisses were. 
Haechan swore loudly and shoved a hand down your shorts, breaking the barriers and feeling your arousal coating his fingers. Did you always have to be so impatient and wet? Your head tipped back with a moan, body arching against his touch. 
You whimpered in surprise when Haechan brought you to a stand to sweep the blanket over the grassy ground and again when he pulled you to the surface, grabbing your shorts by the band and promptly tossing them aside. Haechan made sure you were far away enough from the fire not to be a safety hazard, but close enough for light and warmth. 
Not that you need very much of the latter. Your boyfriend touching you kindled sparks in your body hot enough to make you sweat all over. 
Your boyfriend hungrily stripped you both of your underwear and then lined his hard cock at your entrance, slippery with your own slick. In your mind, an eternity seemed to pass before he winded inside, and you clung tightly to your breath before you lost it forever. 
Haechan leaned below all the while, leaving a trail of sweet kisses up your stomach. You moaned loudly, arching into his touch, somehow feeling an elated sense of pleasure. You were blatantly more aware of his cock pressed deeply into your vice-like cunt, and your legs locked around his hips, pulling him even deeper. 
There was something new. Drunk sex with your boyfriend was always fun, but it wasn’t this. It was sloppier. It was teeth accidentally clashing and giggling into each other’s mouths. 
None of that was happening. Instead, every sensation was a million times more unrestrained and for a second you wondered if you were making it all up in your head or if your boyfriend was simply that good at pleasuring you. 
The thought disappeared as quickly as it had come, because you were too distracted by Haechan’s warm breath on your neck, tickling the flesh as he whispered a bunch of sweet nothings into your ear, full aware that it would bring you over the edge. You felt like a mad woman, unsure of anything and everything except for how perfect it felt to be in your boyfriend’s arms. 
“You feel so good,” Haechan moaned into your ear, and if you hadn’t already spiraled out of control, you sure as hell had now. 
“Fuck. God, Haechan,” you whimpered, too overwhelmed. How in the hell could he feel so good? Every inch of you was sensitive, but every sensation was heightened. “I fucking love this.”
You were half-tempted to pinch yourself to determine if you were lucid dreaming, but then Haechan dug his sharp nails into your hips and you instantly knew there was no denying you were very awake. 
Haechan poorly stifled a snicker and watched the bounce of your breasts as he stroked deeper and deeper. A wavering orange hue casted over your body and highlighted the irrefutable evidence of pleasure on your pretty face, courtesy of the campfire. 
Lord have mercy, you were beautiful. Nothing made him prouder than being able to call you his girl. No woman before you had ever left him so love-struck, so downright in love. You made him crazy in a way that he would never fathom, but what he did know was that he was in over his head and not even death could part you. 
A thought crossed your mind and incited a lustful greed within you, and you grabbed Haechan’s bicep, whimpering, “Haechan, stop.” 
That pulled him out of his little pleasure-induced stupor and Haechan ground to a halt, quickly scanning your face for any sign of discomfort he might’ve missed in his trance. Needless to say, he came short of answers.
“I wanna be on top,” you explained, making him pull out and lay beneath you now. “Just sit back and relax.”
Haechan submitted to you because for fuck’s sake, he was out of his mind in love with you, and whatever you wanted he would give you. You could cry for the moon and he would steal it for you. No questions asked. 
You switched positions to straddle his body, reaching for his cock and steering him to your entrance. Haechan moaned when he was fitted back inside, and your hands slipped to his chest as you eyed him, having the perfect view of his face tensing with pleasure of all kinds. 
Had you not been interrupted by a moan, you would have giggled. Your fingers pranced around his sensitive nipples and Haechan called out your name, palms seeking anchorage at your ass. You were both obviously driving each other insane, in a war to see who could take the other off their hinges. 
Haechan watched you bounce on his cock and it was the most beautiful sight in the world to him. Your mouth parted with blissful sighs and soft moans, your bodies an amalgam of sticky coats of sweat and hotness. 
“I love you,” Haechan blurted through ragged breath, but goddamn was it true. 
“I love you, too,” you moaned in the midst of fucking yourself on a very hard dick.  And trying not to lose what was left of you. “Shit. Holy fuck.” 
Haechan involuntarily thrusted up to meet your motions, matching your quick tempo. You could feel and hear the blood pumping rhythmically in your head, your pulse thudding. Each of your breaths were quick, like you could hardly breathe through the thick tension of pent-up love and desire between you. 
You simply couldn’t stop, couldn’t get enough of the feeling. You couldn’t fathom why it was so goddamn good. Even Haechan had to notice you were riding him harder than usual, chasing satisfaction with a craving that could never be satiated. You felt like an animal, wondering what it was that made him feel even better than you thought possible. 
Every insignificant detail was zeroed in on. Did he always have those little scratches on him? And had you been the reason? Your eyes fell up his neck and down his torso and you bit your lip smugly, noticing all the marks you’d left behind.  
“Baby, I’m so close,” you whimpered, rocking harder. 
“Come on, baby. You’re so beautiful,” Haechan groaned, close and throttled by the tension. You were closing in on him, wrapping around him so tightly and driving him to climax. 
The muscles in your thighs tightened and slackened, and you bounced to the rhythm of the pulsing between your legs. Haechan reached for your hand and laced his fingers through yours, wanting to be thoroughly connected with you through every moment of your orgasm. 
He uncontrollably rambled some more praises in your ears about how good you felt and how beautiful you were, and you couldn’t stop yourself from coming, teeth clamping into your bottom lip to stifle a loud cry and way too immersed in pleasure to notice the pain. Your throbbing cunt and smothered cries prompted Haechan and he released inside, still fucking you back until he rested with a long exhale. 
Your body went limp, crashing at his side. Looking at the sky, you could see stars, but when you closed them, they were still there. 
Haechan immediately started to kiss you and you kissed back, tasting ecstasy on his lips. Your boyfriend cradled your body, whispering, “You did so good. I’m so proud of you.”
You remembered giving a soft little sigh of pleasure and Haechan taking the liberty of redressing you.
Everything after that was a blur. 
When you woke up, the sky was still perpetually dark, but you were in bed. You turned to your side and came to the eerie conclusion that you were very alone. Haechan was nowhere to be found. 
Maybe he’s just using the restroom, you reasoned. Yeah, okay. That happened. For your comfort, you decided to wait up until he returned. 
Half an hour later, Haechan was still a no-show. That was when you began to suspect there was something far more sinister at hand than a visit to the bathroom. You crawled from under the sheets and slipped on your shoes, determined to investigate the matter yourself. 
There was a pounding in your chest. Where could Haechan have disappeared to for thirty minutes in the middle of the night?
Except for anywhere. He could be anywhere in these goddamn woods and you would never find even a trace of him. A cool dread plagued your body and you wrapped your arms around yourself, praying your boyfriend was somewhere safe. You had a strange gut feeling that something heinous had happened and it was all around you, suffocating. 
You crept outdoors and oddly enough, noticed Yuta seated at the campfire. You remembered making love to Haechan there, because the memory was still fresh. For some reason, it felt like moments yet days ago altogether. 
Why was it still lit at this hour? More significantly, what was Yuta doing there so late? 
“Yuta?” you called out. 
No reply. He was stiff as a boulder. You approached him stealthily, wanting to believe he was only playing an evil trick on you. 
When you could finally get a front view of him, you cried out in a blend of surprise and terror. 
Nothing could have prepared you for the gruesome sight of Yuta’s lifeless body. You shrieked and screamed until your voice could barely muster a murmur. For a good while, you only stood there, muscles stiff with shock. Tears silently began to drip as they gathered at your eyelashes. 
You forced your eyes away from Yuta. His face had been burned so badly that you could hardly recognize him. The skin was disfigured with marks, wrinkly and apparently rotten. You noticed the purple lines around his wrists and his slashed throat and hoped he hadn’t been burned alive. 
You refused to look at him, refused to touch him. You cowered away, repulsed by the consuming stench of blood clogging your senses. Feeling nauseous, you turned over and knocked over two near-full wine glasses in your wake, bending your knees. It made you want to throw up. 
This could not be happening. You rubbed your eyes, like there was a chance sleep and your tears were making you delirious. A bitter taste parched your tongue as you prayed this was only a ghastly dream. You would not accept this as reality. You didn’t want to believe Yuta was - completely and irrevocably  - gone.
But regardless of how hard you tried, your body scorned you, refusing to wake up.
This was a living nightmare. 
For some strange reason, there was a canoe approaching the shoreline and you made a beeline for the lake, too blinded by your need for answers to pause and ask yourself why there was somebody paddling at this hour.
“Haechan?” you called out shakily. 
Nothing. Where could he have gone? The night was far too dark for you to piece together who was on the canoe. Which was unnerving.
Dread hit you tenfold when it dawned on you that Haechan could have been anywhere, slain and blood-splattered like how you discovered Yuta. 
Tears made your eyes burn. There was no way in hell your boyfriend was dead. But none of that explained what happened to Yuta. And were the rest of your friends okay?
Why did nobody hear you scream? 
The growing questions only made you tremble with mystification. You couldn’t for the life of you comprehend why anybody would want to do something so unspeakable to Yuta. He had been nothing but an incredible friend to you for years and a wonder to everyone he met. 
Anger briefly numbered you to your fear. Yuta didn’t deserve to die. Not in such a cold-hearted, brutal manner. Nobody did. The look on his face when you found his body was permanently etched into your memory. He had been burned beyond recognition. The damage was irreversible. Even if he somehow survived the burns, there was no way to undo the distortion. 
Your heart had never been so heavy. There was a possibility the wound to his neck killed him, but there was also a fair chance it only damaged him enough to render him unheard. 
What if Yuta tried to scream, but nobody heard him, either? 
You should have known coming to this haunted city was a fatal mistake. The rumors of people slaughtered in Chimera should have been more than enough to dissuade you, but you each were too goddamn stubborn.
Look what that had gotten you. A dead friend, a missing boyfriend, and an uncertain status on the rest of your number. 
The uncertainty about the rest of your friends only made you even sadder. Had they somehow slept through Yuta’s death, too? Or were they victims to a similar fate? 
No. That couldn’t be the case. Because if it was, then why had you been left untouched?
Surely, there were no goddamn miracles in this godforsaken place. 
You wracked your brain trying to remember what happened. For some reason, everything was fuzzy and disoriented. You recalled the whole day up to a point. Haechan and you fooled around in bed until you finally roused. Then, you had breakfast. The boys went canoeing. You went to annoy Winter with your paranoia.
The boys came back and you went on a hike with Haechan only to fool around some more. Then, you returned, took a shower, the boys fired up the grill and you had a conversation with Ten. He froze you out and stormed into his cabin for the night.
Everyone ate dinner without him, they eventually left, and you spent the night fooling around with Haechan under the moonlight. 
Then, everything else went black. You didn’t remember getting into bed with Haechan, but you assumed he carried you there. Your eyes got too heavy after orgasm and you seemingly passed out. 
That was strange. And maybe too much of a coincidence. But Haechan would never do anything to hurt you. Would he? 
Don’t be silly, you chided. Haechan loves you and he’s fucking missing right now. Instead of questioning him, you should be trying to find him before it’s too late. 
You didn’t even let yourself wonder if it already was too late. Haechan was not dead. Anyone could leave you, but not him. Not the boy who promised you forever and then some. 
Haechan was the common denominator, but Ten was the missing piece. You hadn’t seen him since you tried to turn him down gently and there was no telling if he ever came out the cabin since. He may have been in his feelings, but no anger could prompt him to do this. You were certain. 
You were certain about all of them. But if not them, then who did that leave? A ghost? 
Your heart raced quicker than ever before as you bolted to the lake, and you halted dead in your tracks when your feet landed right at its murky edge. The sky was still too dark for you to make out the body on the canoe. You squinted, but you couldn’t even see a body at all. 
Tall, thick trees covered the border of the lake. Moonlight filtered through some of the branches, though unfortunately, it didn’t come close to illuminating the canoe. You glanced at the water and saw a pair of eyes staring back at you. 
And they weren’t your own. 
For a minute, you couldn’t move. You went stiffly rigid, attempting to convince your brain that this was only a figment of your delirious imagination. But the wide pair of eyes didn’t move. They didn’t even blink. 
Fear flooded back into your body, bleeding thickly out of you, and you lurched back with an eldritch scream. Everything happened so damn quickly. Your back hit the trunk of a tree and the branches rattled. A body plummeted violently into the cool water, but you didn’t register the splash, veins pumping icy dread instead of warm blood. 
You didn’t investigate, slumping against the tree and pulling your knees to your bosom. You cried hot tears, because you recognized those eyes. They were the same ones you always caught staring at you. They were the same ones that looked at you with hurt and heartbreak the last time you’d seen them. 
Now, they looked at you with lifelessness. And they unmistakably belonged to Ten. 
“I’m sorry,” you cried, as if he could hear you. “I should have left it alone. I didn’t mean to hurt you. I didn’t mean to make things worse.” 
There was no word to describe the depth and darkness of the feeling that plagued you now. You shuddered, an imagined nipping wind numbing you beyond the surface and to the very fucking core. It was brutal and ruthless. 
Every inch of your body was bitter with pain. You were so dizzy with shock and consternation that you couldn’t even stand. Your head ached from crying so damn much. 
You felt like you had done this to Ten. He was even harder to move on from. Your last memories were anything but happy and you could only picture the ache and longing absorbing his features, the hurt crushing the impact of his voice. 
Nothing made sense to you. Ten fell for your gentleness, but resented you for letting him down gently. You wanted to understand him. You wanted to make things better, but you failed and now you would have to live with that mistake forever. Because it was too late to undo. 
“I thought I was doing the right thing,” you croaked quietly, voice absent. “Now, I’ll never be able to. Please forgive me.”
Every breath you took was pained. You could barely speak without your voice cracking. There was no welcoming feeling. Especially not the self-loathing that swallowed you whole and throttled you. Everything you felt was cold and lingering, dark and unfurling. 
You must have spent an eternity sitting there sobbing your heart out, mourning your dead friend, because you only stood to your feet when you heard the sound of something meeting the shoreline. 
 The canoe. You had forgotten all about the damn thing and frowned when you saw nobody. You walked over and had your blood already not been icy, it would have run cold. 
Jaehyun laid sprawled across the canoe, completely soaked, like he had toppled over into the lake. 
“Jay,” you gasped, shocked. This whole time you had been calling out for a dead body. He was ghostly pale, hair stuck to his skin. 
You made the decision to reach over, careful not to rock the canoe too much in case you tripped over, and felt for a pulse. Even a weak one. Anything that proved he wasn’t gone. 
Unfortunately, that wasn’t the case. Jaehyun was ruthlessly still. His body was like ice and in your head, a temperature of a negative degree. You accidentally left a bloody print on his arm, recouping your hand when you begrudgingly accepted he was no longer breathing and there was no chance of him ever doing so again, and crept back over to the shore. 
Just when you thought you had no more tears left to cry, they fell again, mocking you. You could dimly see your reflection, your tear-stained face a complete mess. 
That was the third dead body. With each one, you loss more and more faith that any of your friends were okay. 
But there was still Haechan and Winter. 
That made you confused. Jaehyun would never leave Winter by herself. Especially not in the middle of the night in dark, haunted woods. How in the hell did he get on a canoe by himself? 
The whole reason Jaehyun even came on this trip was to protect her in case this place turned out to actually be haunted. Was Winter okay? Jaehyun would never let anyone harm her, if there was anything he could do. They would have to get through him before they got to her. 
Maybe they did get through him. 
Rage warmed you and gave you life again. Whoever did this would pay. You would find them and seek sweet revenge. But first, you needed to confirm whether or not your boyfriend and your best friend were alive. 
Now that you thought about it, Haechan would never leave you alone, either. It simply wasn’t in his nature and didn’t make sense. Not even a little bit. 
When presented with a perceived danger, Haechan’s first instinct was to grab you and keep you sheltered in his arms. When you were frightened for your life, Haechan never failed to soothe you, promising you he would go through hell and back to keep you safe. 
That wouldn’t change all of the sudden. He was no coward. Now, your heart hurt, wondering if he had given himself up to protect you too. 
You turned around and made a beeline for Winter and Jaehyun’s cabin. You needed to find her. You needed to know she was okay. Together, you could get the hell out of here, but not before you found your boyfriend also. 
The campground was the same as you’d left, still as lifeless as before with Yuta’s corpse by the campfire, and you weren’t too sure how that made you feel. You darted to the right, immediately charging straight towards your best friend’s cabin. 
There were no lights on. The only source of light was the campfire burning in the center. It gave you hope that Winter may have been sleeping peacefully, oblivious to all that happened. 
But unlike you, Winter was a light sleeper. Wouldn’t she have noticed Jaehyun crawling out of bed or something? 
You frowned. You didn’t know what happened. Jaehyun could have sensed danger outside and went to investigate. He could have kissed her forehead and urged her to go to sleep. 
You shook your head and slowly opened the door, ignorant of the blood print you’d left on the knob, pulse speeding at the eerie sound of it pushing open. The darkness made you wary. You couldn’t even be sure if she was on the bed. 
For assistance, you turned on the light, and breathed a little in relief when you noticed a figure slumped under the sheets. But why was her head below the comforter? Winter never slept like that. Something about it being too hot and too hard to breathe. 
The relief you felt was short-lived. Dread returned and you inhaled and exhaled deeply. A part of you didn’t want to know if your best friend was dead or not. But she was too still. Like she wasn’t even breathing under the covers. 
You plucked the cover off her face and trembled. There was fresh blood on her chin, rolling down her lips. And a fork in her left hand. And you had a sneaking suspicion that you knew why. 
Gently, you opened her mouth, and when you saw that a piece of her tongue was no longer there you had a painful moment of realization. 
Your heart broke. It didn’t split down the middle, but broke into millions of pieces. Winter was dead. But you knew damn well Haechan was still out there somewhere, good and well. 
You grabbed Winter’s lifeless body in your arms and cried into her shoulder, oddly comforted by the fact her body was still warm. Everything made sense now. This was all your fault. 
Nothing was a coincidence. Winter frightened you and made you bite your tongue. Then, you found her with a fork in her hand, a piece of her tongue removed. Yuta gave you his marshmallow when you burned yours. Then, you found him with his face burned without a lick of mercy. 
Ten always stared at you. He was always watching. He looked at you with a kind of adoration in his eyes. You found him staring into his own reflection, body slumped on a tree. 
And Jaehyun offered to take you on a canoe ride with the guys. You found him sprawled across that very same canoe. 
“I did this to you,” you sobbed, grabbing her hand. You bristled when you noticed blood on her fingernails, knowing it wasn’t her. Winter fought to protect her damn self. 
And you knew who attacked her. 
You were so overwhelmed. You had never felt this many emotions at once before. Especially not this intensely. You were wounded and betrayed. Angry and regretful. Frightened and loathing. 
For a moment, you only cried in Winter’s warmth, holding her hand and blaming yourself for everything. You begged her to wake up. You begged her to smile and tap your arm, screaming, “Just kidding!” 
This had to be a prank. This had to be some cruel joke that you were the butt of, a trick at your expense. You wanted everyone to open the door one by one and laugh at you for falling for such a stupid scheme, but you knew in your heart it wasn’t true. 
You saw the very real marks on Yuta’s face. You saw the lifelessness in Ten’s eyes. You felt Jaehyun’s non-existent pulse. Even now, you could feel the warmth slowly leaving Winter’s body. 
Eventually you pulled away, wiping your eyes with the back of your hand. You saw the blood on the sheets and frowned. That hadn’t been there before. Only then did you notice the blood dampening your clothes. 
How long had that been there? Was it from one of the bodies? 
No, because I only touched Jaehyun. And he clearly drowned, you thought. But pushed the thought of Jaehyun’s drenched body out of your head as quickly as it came. 
There were more pressing matters at hand. You needed to get the hell out of here. And you needed to do so alive. Someone had to be the bearer of bad news. Someone had to tell your friends’ parents that their worst nightmare had come true. 
You found the courage to leave your best friend there and crept outside the cabin. Your phone was in Ten’s and Yuta’s. Goddamn it. 
The sight of Haechan emerging from the woods made you grind to a halt. You were scared for your goddamn life. You had no idea what your chances of survival were, but you got it now. Why you had been spared from your friend’s fate. 
The Haechan you loved was not the man staring at you from afar. The Haechan you’d come to know was not the man approaching you. He was somebody else. Somebody you were not familiar with and did not know how to handle. 
Adrenaline thumped in your head. You had a choice. You could flee or you could fight. 
For now, you decided to play dumb. 
“Baby,” you called out, colliding into his cold arms. “Everybody’s dead! Are you okay? What happened to you?”
Haechan stared at you unrecognizably. You knew you were looking danger dead in the eye. There was no warmth in him, no life. He had blood stains on his clothes and scratches on his face. 
From Winter, you bristled inwardly. You banished the thought, knowing your cover would be blown the longer you thought about how he had preyed down your friends. 
Haechan coiled an arm around you and said simply, “It’s not my blood.” 
“Not your blood?” you repeated slowly, pulling yourself away. “Then, whose blood is it?” 
Your boyfriend only smiled. “I think you know the answer to that, sweetheart,” he said sweetly, but you knew only venom was inside him. 
You wanted to scream. There was no deceiving him. You could tell he already knew. Haechan read you like an open book and you knew he would never not have you all figured out. 
Giving up deception, you cried, “Why?” 
“Because you’re mine,” he explained with a gentleness to his tone, approaching you despite picking up on how adamant you were on keeping him at arm’s length. “Don’t you see? Everybody wants to keep us apart. We can be alone now.” 
“Haechan, nobody was keeping us apart,” you said, unable to justify his actions. 
“Yes, they were,” Haechan argued. “Like the old geezer at your job. He worked you too much and paid you too little. I was doing you a favor.” 
You paused as you processed his words. He was talking about your boss. The same boss that mysteriously died a couple of weeks back. You put the pieces together. 
You gasped, “You killed him?”
Haechan scoffed. “Don’t give me that look. I know you hated the guy. I remember the smile on your face when you told me your boss was dead.” 
“Yuta, Ten, Winter, and Jaehyun weren’t keeping us away from each other,” you hissed, using rage as your fuel and hatred as your anchor. “They did nothing to us.” 
“They were nuisances. You spent too much time with them. You’re better off without them anyway, baby. Winter hurt you and laughed in your face. I mean, what kind of best friend does that? Of course, I had to eliminate the bigger threat before I got to her.” 
The bigger threat was Jaehyun. He would go to the ends of the earth for Winter and you could tell from the moment he was introduced to you. You gave him the golden stamp of approval for a reason. 
Jaehyun would protect Winter until he had nothing left to give. You had no idea how Haechan took him down, but at this point, you didn’t want to know. It made you well with pain. You hoped they met again in the afterlife and in the next one with a much kinder fate.  
Haechan continued, “Yuta was too comfortable. I didn’t like how he talked to you. He always got too close, leaning into you and shit. I had enough. And Ten definitely wanted to take you away from me. I know you saw how he looked at you.” 
The pressure in your heart was building. You couldn’t breathe. You needed a pulse. The whole world was upside down. “You said… you said it didn’t make you angry. You told me that you didn’t care about those kinds of things. I thought you were different.” 
“Don’t you dare compare me to them,” Haechan chided, stepping closer. You stumbled and he caught you in his heavy arms, not letting up even when you tried to swat him away. “I love you better than your exes ever did. They didn’t care for you, baby. They could never love you like I do. Nobody can.”
Struggling in his arms, you screamed in his face, “My exes didn’t kill all my fucking friends!” 
Haechan started to laugh. You gaped at him and his audacity. There was no kind of levity in this situation and yet he was humored. You knew now that your boyfriend was a goddamn psychopath. 
You managed to slip away from him by grace of his distractedness and barked, “What the hell is so funny?” 
Haechan explained through bursts of laughter, “Do you think I could have killed four people by myself? We did this together, baby. Just look at yourself.” 
You reluctantly did as told. That was when the blood on your clothes finally made sense and you started to feel dirtier than ever. Was your friends’ blood on your hands? That would explain the blood on Winter’s sheets. 
Unable to endure the pain, you dropped to your knees, losing the strength to stand. The blood was everywhere. It stained your palms. Now, conscious of its presence, you were hyper aware that you were covered in your friends blood and the feeling was akin to being dipped in acid. 
How could you have only now noticed? You were too frenzied searching for your friends, searching for a spark of life in this desolate city. 
You clung to denial, chanting through sobs, “No. No, no, no.”
“Shh,” Haechan sang, pulling you into his embrace gently. He had stopped laughing, but this was a man incapable of empathy. No matter how convincing he was. “We’re finally alone, sweetie. No one to steal you from me.”
You hated yourself for not loathing the way his body felt around yours. There was a big part of you that wanted to go back to a couple of hours ago, when you thought it was only him and you in this world, and you had no idea the traumatic experience you’d have only hours later. 
That made the world stop. You found peace for a split second before hell peeled the corners of your vision again. Your head rose up, and you looked Haechan in his empty, dark eyes. 
Had you imagined the spark there? No. You had to look deeper. There was a fire there, a web of temptation, desire, and viciousness. That was what you saw in him. It was passion, but you had mistaken it for a different kind. 
“Haechan?” you called out. 
Your boyfriend said pleasantly, “Yes, my dear?” 
“Did you put something in my champagne?”
“Yes.” 
At least he was honest. For once. 
“You spiked my drink,” you began, voice cracking. “Because you knew I would never agree to your sick ways in my right mind.” 
To your dismay, Haechan didn’t deny the accusation, only giving you a sickening smile and stroking your hair gently. Like your whole world wasn’t upside down now. He,  like this was some kind of joke, merely said, “Ahchoo.”
You bristled with a vicious wrath. Haechan was out of his goddamn mind. He didn’t give a single fuck about what he had done and frankly, you’d had enough of trying to converse. You needed to get out of here immediately and seek help. There was no way you would play along with his twisted delusion. 
A chimera. 
Your heart stopped when you once again came to the brutal realization that your phone was trapped in Yuta and Ten’s cabin. You knew Haechan would never let you get away with a phone call. If you could even make one. In the middle of nowhere, there was no such thing as Wi-Fi or service. 
Plus you were surrounded by acres of trees and water. Where the hell would you go? The main road would be too damn obvious even if you somehow managed to get there. And without a car, you were positively out of luck. 
Haechan’s tone was saccharine, but there was only poison in his voice as he leaned into your ear and warned, “Whatever you’re thinking; don’t you fucking dare.”
You glared Haechan dead in the eyes, adrenaline coming over you, and you gave him a smack across the face. 
Then, you leapt up and bolted into the woods. Haechan only laughed when you slapped him, but you didn’t turn around, and you damn sure didn’t stop. Fucking psycho, you sneered. 
You vanished into the thick trees, now grateful for the darkness, though time was running scarce. Daylight would be approaching soon. Shock made you lose track of time. There was no telling how long you’d spent losing what remained of your sanity.
You were a livewire, blood pumping in your ears. The sound of twigs snapping behind you made you hyper aware of Haechan’s manhunt and you knew he wasn’t far behind, but you never gave up. Your legs ached from the lack of oxygen, but your white flag was still lowered. You would never give him the satisfaction of surrender until you knew you’d done all possible to save yourself. 
Your lover called out from somewhere behind you, “You can run, baby - I love a chase - but you can’t hide.” 
The rage blindsided you. He was the epitome of a nightmare dressed like a daydream. How could you not have noticed? This was the man you spent every spare second of your day with. How could you not have seen him for the creature he truly was beneath the surface? 
Haechan liked the hunt. There was still a chipperness to his tone even as he followed the noise of your feet scurrying through those dark, wicked woods. He was evil. He was a monster. But you knew now that the villains of this godforsaken town were not ghosts or spirits - they were the very people you trusted with your life. 
Tears blurred your vision and shock made the world swivel. You refused to be another rumor. You refused to be reduced to another campfire story. You would fight for your life up until your very last exhale.
“Where do you plan on going, darling?” Haechan asked, tone welling with concern. “There’s nothing or no one out here for miles. You’ll die out here before you find someone to save you.”
You slammed into a tree and swore louder than you would’ve liked, knowing Haechan was hot on your trail because you could hear him chiding you for being so clumsy. 
“But you didn’t die out there,” said your therapist. 
You bobbed your head. “I got back up and I ran,” you told her, shuddering as you were forced to place yourself back in what was easily the worst day of your goddamn life. “He was so close. I ran into the daylight. I was in those woods for days. I had nothing. No food, no water.” 
“You had resolve,” the therapist corrected. “Because of that, you’re here to tell the story.”
You nodded a little, because you only barely survived. You genuinely thought you would die that night. If not by Haechan himself, then eventually hunger or dehydration.
“Why does this always happen to me?” you cried. “Every time I fall for someone, they treat me like a possession. But I never thought it would go this far. How come I didn’t realize until it was too late? I even…their blood is on my hands.” 
The therapist stopped you right there. “He took advantage of your trust and adulterated your champagne without your knowledge to make you easier to manipulate. You said it yourself. He knew you would never agree in your right mind.”
None of her consolation helped. Half a year had passed since the most traumatic event of your life. The wound still felt fresh. You could still hear your friends’ voices and see their faces following you everywhere. 
And knowing that their blood was on your hands made things even worse. You could hardly live with yourself. None of this would have happened if you would have never met Haechan, if you would have never given him the time of day. They would still be here, living their lives. 
It wasn’t fair that only you and that monster survived that day. You despised yourself for giving him access, but you loathed him for what he took from you. 
For what he took from them.  
She asked, “Have the nightmares stopped?” 
The nightmares started a little after that weekend and hadn’t ceased since. They would return to you every single night as you slept, more or less the same as before. You would be running for dear life as Haechan hunted you down. The setting was never the same. Some nights, he would chase you through a labyrinth of trees. Others, through a never-ending hallway. No matter the setting, he would hunt you until he finally caught you and leapt over you.
But only once he uttered the same four words in your ear would you wake, “You’re all mine now.”
They were simple, but they never failed to creep the living hell out of you. 
You shuddered. “No. But they’ve become less frequent.”
“And why do you think that is?” 
You shrugged. “I don’t know. It happened after I started spending time with this guy.”
That piqued her interest. “New boyfriend?”
“Not really,” you replied, the mere thought making you tremble. “I’m talking to this guy - Mark. He’s really sweet and I do like him, but I told him I’m not ready for a relationship. Frankly, I’m not sure if I ever will be again. But we still spend time, because I like his company.”
“That is a completely normal response after being exposed to a traumatic event. It may cause you to be emotionally distant, self-protective, and wary of others intentions. It is a difficult part of the process of healing and learning how to navigate through life as you did before.”
Though you already knew the answer, you asked, “Will my life ever be the same?” 
“Not likely,” the therapist told you honestly. “This is a new beginning for you. You’ll be learning to shed your old skin and adapt.”
You frowned. 
The therapist concluded the session not much later and you went home. Therapy was new for you. Ironically enough, it was never your idea. Instead of pressuring you into explaining what the hell happened to you, Mark suggested you tried therapy. 
To think of the boy sitting at home waiting for you was bittersweet. You sincerely enjoyed spending time with Mark, but you simply couldn’t bring yourself to be vulnerable with him. Like the therapist said, you were being self-protective and wary of his intentions. No matter how hard you tried, you knew you would never be able to trust the same way again.
It made you feel as if you were keeping Mark’s heart chained away. Mark was gentle and the one to suggest you take things slowly, but a godawful feeling plagued you whenever reminded he was waiting for the girl he always wanted. And there was a chance you could never be that girl. 
You wondered what he saw in you. What he saw in a girl so broken that she couldn’t bring herself to love anyone. Did he want to take advantage of your vulnerability? Was he the same kind of evil as the ones before him? 
Love was a wager, but you had no more of yourself to give. 
As you stepped inside your car, you monitored everything around you and likely quadruple-checked the backseat. Ever since that fateful day, you were hyper aware of your surroundings. You may have escaped Haechan, but that didn’t mean he would never come back to stake his claim to you.
You drove, obsessively checking your rear-view mirror. Nobody was following you, but you could never be too safe. You were more wary than usual today. There was something in the air. 
Or maybe you were just extremely paranoid. That was more plausible. 
You hated driving through town. There was a song on the radio and it reminded you of Winter, because she would burst out singing whenever it came on. Jaehyun would be sure to duet with her. You changed the station. 
Then, you passed by a bookstore. That was where you met Ten. You remembered the very second your hands touched the same novel, fingers brushing against each other’s, and the glare you both exchanged then said loud and clear that neither of you would be backing down. But when he learned you had a copy of a book he’d been tirelessly hunting for, he let you have it and you promised to swap later. 
Unbeknownst to you, Ten freaked the hell out that night when it hit him that he had unintentionally scored a very pretty girl’s number. 
It was over for you when you saw the lake sitting at the side of the road. Yuta would meet you there for an afternoon jog whenever you had the spare time. Your friends would argue it was too romantic, but Yuta never gave a fuck what other people think. You were close, but he knew where you stood and Yuta would rather die than bone you. 
Tears threatened. Why couldn’t you get them out of your head? The guilt was eating you alive. You wanted your life back. But you tainted the chance of normalcy the second you caught a monster’s goddamn eye.  
As soon as you got home, you noticed another car parked in the driveway. Mark’s car. He asked if he could come over earlier to see you after your therapy session. You told him, “You know where the spare key is.” 
It was definitely frightening, but you wanted to trust Mark. He displayed no suspicious signs, no red flags. Then again, neither did Haechan. And everyone knew how that story went. 
No happy ever after. 
There was an overwhelmingly strong aroma of sauces and spices hitting you square in the nose the moment you stepped inside your house and there was a trail of roses predictably leading from the front door to the dining room. You cocked a brow. Since when did Mark learn how to cook? This was the same boy that could barely make instant noodles without burning you both alive. 
“Mark?” you called out. 
No reply. Which was odd. Mark couldn’t wait to see you. 
You hung your coat and followed the trail of rose petals as that was obviously what you were intended to do. The sound of old school romance music began to play even louder the closer you inched and you shuddered at how much it reminded you of Haechan. 
When he was bored, he would turn on the speaker and sing his heart out to you, making you laugh at how he danced and gave you a five-star performance. 
The memories used to make you smile fondly. Now, you were a well of unadulterated fear. 
Even this specific song tore you down. Haechan loved Michael Jackson more than anyone you ever knew. As far as you were concerned, Mark was more of an old school rap guy. 
You finally approached the dining room and your heart ricocheted at what you saw. There was Mark, bound to a chair with a gag in his mouth. And Haechan stood there with a twisted smile on his face as he saw you, holding a gun to Mark’s head. 
“Mark,” you gasped, knees buckling. 
You could hear Mark whimper faintly, though his voice was muffled. He looked at you with total fear in his eyes and you were more than apologetic, the self-loathing returning as you knew the innocent life of yet another person would ultimately be destroyed because of you. 
Haechan playfully whined, “What about me? I’m here, too.” 
“You fucking monster!” you screamed. 
Your now ex-boyfriend switched on a dime and pointed his gun at you, sneering, “Sit down.”
With a fatal weapon pointed to you, you quickly complied, finding a seat at the table. You noticed there were two plates there, each at the head of the table. Mark was forced to sit at the side. 
Because he had no part in this game. He was only another nuisance, as Haechan had put it in his own terms. Another obstacle to be eliminated. Tears stung your eyes.
Your ex was delighted by your submission and took his seat at the other end of the table, facing you, but he kept his gun tucked close. You couldn’t ignore the plates in front of you both. Only God knew how long he had been waiting for you. You knew he wanted you to play into the fantasy you’d obstructed six months ago, however, your ex-boyfriend was anything but deterred. 
“I’m glad you finally made it. Mark and I were waiting for you to join us,” Haechan said, as if this was some friendly gathering and not a hostage situation. “Although, he was an unexpected guest. But it’s no biggie.” 
You sat there and pleaded, “Haechan, please don’t hurt him. This has nothing to do with him. You want me? Just take me. Leave him alone.” 
Haechan’s tone was lighthearted despite the betrayed nature of his words, “Wow. You like him that much? I thought I meant something to you.”
“That was before you slaughtered our friends like a beast,” you hissed, seething. 
Haechan corrected, “More like a pack of wolves. Everything we do is a group effort, baby. We’re a team. We’re in this together. There is no you without me and no me without you.”
You met Mark’s eyes and instantly knew what he was thinking. This guy is a total psychopath. 
He could tell this was what you had been hiding and you were aware. You had never discussed your trauma with him at length and Mark never made you feel any pressure to. Now, he understood what had you so scarred. 
You called with disdain, “Donghyuck.” 
Haechan ignored you calling him by his government name and changed his tone, feigning woundedness, “I can’t believe you tried to replace me, baby. You even told him where the spare key is. Did you actually think I wouldn’t come back to take what’s mine?” 
“I’m not yours, Donghyuck,” you told him, words dripping with vitriol. “And I never will be again. You had your chance and you blew it.”
“How could you say that?” Haechan asked, eyes wide and dark with an emotion you had no intention of understanding. “After all I’ve done for you. All I’ve done for us so that we could be alone together. I love you so much.”
For a second, you were at a loss for words, then explained, “This isn’t love. This is obsession. You need help.”
Haechan furiously snapped, “I need you. And I will stop at nothing to have you.”
Your ex-boyfriend stood to his feet and you entirely expected hell to break loose, but you were thrown for a loop when Mark tackled him to the ground, somehow unraveling his ropes while Haechan was distracted by you. 
Mark screamed at you, “Run!” 
You hesitated. You didn’t want to leave Mark there alone to die. The past six months had been spent trying to recover from the blood on your hands and you couldn’t go through that torture. There was a chance you would lose another part of your sanity that you barely had as is. But Mark gave you a look and you bolted out of there. 
As soon as you slipped out the front door, you heard a gunshot echoing and trembled, but you never stopped running. Your phone was in your car. You glanced around, expecting at least some of your neighbors to be concerned by the noise, though no one came. 
Your brows furrowed. There were cars parked in most of the driveways and this was a notably safe neighborhood. How could nobody care? 
The moment you got to your car you collapsed in relief when you saw your phone and immediately tried to dial the police, but strangely, your phone had no connection. You threw your head back frustratedly and nearly screamed at the top of your lungs. 
You didn’t even want to ask what the hell was going on. Haechan had returned to resume unfinished business, and this time, he would not leave empty-handed.
Your only other option was to go find help and you felt a twinge of worry sitting in your stomach when you realized that entailed leaving Mark by himself. You had no idea what was happening  - or had happened - in that house.
Without any other options, you searched for your keys and froze when you remembered that you’d left them in the pocket of your coat. Which you had hung up inside. 
You heard the front door creaking open and exhaled in relief when you realized it was only Mark, escaping unscathed. For now. 
Mark was heaving for breath and incredulous when he noticed you only standing there. “Why haven’t you left?”
“I left my keys inside,” you explained frantically, running into his arms. “I tried to call the police, but it didn’t work. And nobody came outside after the gunshot. I think he did something.” 
Mark made a face because despite both your cars parked in the driveway, he didn’t have his keys, either. “We have to go right now. None of us were shot. He’s going to come looking for you any second now,” he said, grabbing your hand and yanking you down the street. 
You could hardly match his long strides, but adrenaline gave you a surge of strength. Between your feet and your pulse, you couldn’t decide what was quicker. Your heart was thumping so loudly you swore Mark could hear. 
The curiosity consumed you and you asked through ragged breath, “How’d you get out of the ropes?”
“Five years of summer camp in a row,” Mark explained. “I never thought learning how to untie knots would benefit me, but look at God.”
Noticing how tightly he was holding your hand only made you weaker. You hoped and prayed you would come out of this unscathed. Not only you, but Mark too. You couldn’t lose another person at the hands of your psychopathic ex-boyfriend. The guilt and self-hatred would consume you. “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. I didn’t mean to drag you into this,” you cried. 
“We’ll talk about this when we’re safe,” Mark told you, clearing another corner.
You heard Haechan’s smooth voice calling after you, but his tone was downright spine-chilling. He was out for blood. Mark held you closer to his chest as you both sprinted down the sidewalk, praying to god Haechan didn't know where you’d gone. 
It was downright odd. Why was no one there but you three? The weather was perfect for an afternoon walk with your dog around the neighborhood, but there was nobody. Not even someone tending to their garden or taking out the trash. And how had no one bat an eye at the piercing sound of a gunshot? 
Wondering if it was a coincidence or if there was something much more nefarious at work made your head spin. The emptiness was unnerving. You couldn’t comprehend how Haechan could have gotten the entire neighborhood to evacuate, but you had underestimated him once. You weren’t keen on doing so again.
Having Mark there to support your weight was the only thing keeping you from dropping to the ground in surrender. You were just so tired. You were tired of running, tired of mustering the strength to rouse another day only to be haunted by guilt and regret. It was close to consuming you. And there would nothing of you to remain. You were running on empty. Your body was exhausted, but your mind was worn thin. 
“Come on,” Mark said, noticing your strength dwindling. “You can do this, baby. We can get out of here.” 
Mark ground to a halt to face you and softened when he saw your eyes. He could tell this had ruined you. He would never know the girl you were before Haechan alas broke you. 
There was an uncanny resemblance between now and your nightmares. Haechan was hunting you down like an animal, hot on your heels. Only now, you had Mark to protect you. But deep inside, you knew there was nothing that could stand in Haechan’s way when he wanted something. 
Mark cradled you in his arms when you slept and kept the monsters under your bed away. But this was the real thing. He couldn’t save you. No one could.
It all just happened so fast. 
A loud snap rended the air and the very next second, Mark was crouching on the asphalt, stomach gaping with blood. He was wide-eyed, a hand cupping his stomach. 
“Mark!” you screamed. 
You dropped to your knees, crouching beside him, and tried desperately to keep the blood from leaving him all too soon. But there was so much. The sight of the deep color staining your hands only made you nauseous with deja vu. 
Mark was weak, still on the sidewalk. He couldn’t scream, but you could see the pain in his pretty eyes. It thoroughly devastated you. 
“Don’t leave me. Please, Mark,” you begged, tears stinging your eyes. But you couldn’t hear yourself speak. You couldn’t hear yourself think. You were so fixated on Mark slowly fading away beneath your fingertips that you didn’t notice the presence behind you until it was too late. 
Haechan’s voice was saccharine but his eyes were welling with ire, “He’s not going to make it, darling. There’s no one out here to help him.” 
You ignored Haechan, plagued by fear or hatred or all of the above. Watching Mark die would be too overwhelming. At least you had no recollection of your friend’s deaths. Seeing Mark take his final breaths would kill you too. “Keep your eyes open for me,” you told Mark, noticing he was going cold. “Keep them open!”
Mark was struggling, but he tried for you. You could feel the last piece of you die as he fought for his life and you sat there, unable to do anything to keep him stable. He was dying. He reached for your hand with his trembling arm and squeezed with all the strength he could muster. 
That angered Haechan and seething with rage, he coiled his arms around you, pulling you away from Mark. 
You kicked and threw your arms back, screaming at the top of your lungs, “Get your hands off me, you sick son of a bitch! You’ve taken everything from me! I fucking hate you!”
Haechan was unbothered, only cooing, “You don’t mean that, baby girl. One day you’ll understand that everything I do is out of love for you.” 
Mark was coughing up blood now and the sight was horrifying. Tears rolled down your cheeks. You were in so much pain, covered in wounds only you could see. You could only imagine what Mark was feeling now as he took his last breaths. 
Mark called out your name faintly and said with the last of his strength, “Thank you for being the best thing to ever happen to me.” 
You screamed in agony and grief when Mark’s eyes shut on you. You begged him not to leave you. Though he was only unconscious, you knew you’d seen and heard the last of him. 
Your pain was converted to anger and you thrashed in Haechan’s arms, only wanting Mark’s embrace. “Let me go,” you shouted, trying to escape. But to no avail. Your hands burned with his blood. Every inhale was agonizing. “Let go of me!”
“Shh,” Haechan whispered, swiping a trail of tears from your face. “Don’t you see? He was trying to come between us.” 
Haechan still kept you close by, but finally released you. You kneeled to the ground, too overcome by dizziness to stand. Your mind was screaming at you. Your heart was pounding. Every piece of you was so dead yet alive altogether. You could only scream, wanting to take your friend’s fate for them. 
Nobody heard you. There was nobody there. You cried and raged, but save for you, Haechan, and Mark’s lifeless body, the whole neighborhood was empty. You were alone in your pain and suffering and nobody would hear you cry. 
“Why?” you turned to Haechan and screamed, lips trembling. “Why do you keep doing this to me?”
Haechan pressed his lips to your ear and told you with no hesitation, “Because there is nothing I wouldn’t do for you.” 
Had you not already dissolved into tears, you would have. Life as you’d known it was forever gone because of this man and it had become unbearable now. There was no way you could live with yourself anymore. The guilt was overpowering. You were being self-protective, but Mark had died to protect you. Winter, Jaehyun, Yuta, and Ten had died at your expense. The feelings that plagued you now were simply too much for the human mind to handle. 
Your palms hit the ground, scuffing the asphalt. Your body was limp with defeat. There was no fight in you anymore. He had broken you. 
“You win,” you croaked, surrendering. “Whatever this game is, you fucking win. I can’t do this anymore.”
Haechan beamed, all too excited by those words. “I knew you would come around.” 
Haechan cradled you in his arms and you let him. You had no more strength or will to fight him. He had milked you dry. You only sat there unmoving, wondering where you’d gone wrong. If this could have been avoided or if Haechan destroying your life was merely inevitable.
Pain throttled you, hands clamped bruisingly around your neck. You cried and screamed until it was out of your system and your voice no longer worked. Haechan endeavored to soothe you the whole time, stroking your back. Even your tears were precious to him. He hated to make you cry, but one day you would understand why this needed to happen. 
For now, he had won. You said it yourself. There was a big grin on his face as he claimed victory. 
“There, there. It’s time to go now, babe,” Haechan cooed, lifting you into his arms. He liked that you still instinctively wrapped your arms around your neck, and he stared into your eyes, in love with the beauty within them. “You’re all mine now.”
“I’m yours,” you repeated back quietly, accepting. “All yours.”
A single tear slipped down your cheek. 
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atinylittlepain · 1 year
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Hiya! I love your writing so much it's amazing. Can I request Joel and Reader! smut? Maybe angry s3x? I loveeeee grumpy Joel. They would def be primal and rough and fast about it too...oof. I'm not too good at coming up with plotlines haha
Anyways thank you so much if you do! :3
oof, this was fun to write
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gif by @tightjeansjavi
Menace
Joel Miller x f!reader
Joel Miller masterlist
When Joel refuses to join her at the bar, she has a good time by herself. But he just can't stay away.
warnings | 18+ SMUT, rough sex, little angst, little fluff, mostly just smut tho
...........................
If Joel were here right now, she knows he wouldn’t like the looks of things one bit. Not because she’s in any sort of danger, the only real danger at the Tipsy Bison is whatever that cheap grog is that they keep stewing in the back. No, what Joel wouldn’t like to see is her having a good time, for once, without him. And that’s exactly what she’s doing. 
It’s a Friday night in Jackson, a town in which she can actually enjoy the luxury of having a real Friday night after a long week of patrol shifts. Joel, in all his brooding glory, had rejected her invitation to go out to the bar, telling her that all he wanted was some “fucking peace and quiet.” She hadn’t let that get her down, though, scoffing at his petulant grumbles and heading out by herself. And she was having a damn good time too.
“Goddamn, girl. Giving me a run for my money.” She grins at the man, idly spinning her cue stick in her hands as she walks along the pool table. 
“You better shape up then, or you’re gonna owe me another drink.” The man throws his head back in a laugh at that, his eyes crinkling up as he looks at her. His name is Teddy, one of the younger men around town who also works patrol shifts. She had a shift with him earlier in the week, and he had been warm and welcoming to her, still pretty new to the swing of things. It doesn’t take a genius to see that he’s flirting with her, and she’s happy to play along for now, knowing she’s got her grump of a man waiting for her back home, probably snoring in bed already. Love is strange, but she is Joel’s and he is most certainly hers, and she wouldn’t have it any other way. But for now, a little banter with this sweet boy isn’t going to hurt anyone.
“Watch and learn, Teddy. I’m gonna show you how it’s done.” The man whistles low as she bends over the table, lining her cue stick up with her target. So what if she’s hamming it up a bit? Shimmying her hips and flicking her hair out of her face. A small crowd has gathered around the table to watch her smoke this kid, and she’s enjoying the feeling of letting loose after being tensed up for so long.
She moves cool and slick around the table, driving home her last three balls before setting her sights on the eightball. It looks like a tough shot, and she revels in her confidence that she can sink it, feeling Teddy’s eyes sweeping down the slope of her back as she arches over the table. There’s a hushed swell of laughter and a few whoops when she hits the eightball clean into a pocket, and she turns and shoots Teddy a crooked smile.
“Pay up, boy. I want the good stuff this time, top shelf only.” Teddy barks out another laugh, but it quickly dissolves as his eyes flit just behind her. She feels him before she sees him, the solid warmth of him pressing up behind her and a broad palm splaying over her shoulder. He’s certainly not snoring in bed.
“You’ll have to take a rain check, son. She’s needed at home right now.” The low rasp of his voice tells her all she needs to know. He saw her, and the little moves she was making, and now, Joel Miller is pissed.
She can see the bob of Teddy’s throat as he swallows, nodding jerkily. She winces at the crack in his voice when he says that’s alright, he’ll see her around. Joel may be a grump, but he’s also a scary grump when he wants to be, like right about now as he’s steering her out of the bar with his hand still on her shoulder.
“Putting on a little show for all them townsfolk, darlin?” His southern drawl always gets headier, slower, when he’s angry. It’s never a good sign when she starts having a hard time pulling his honey-thick words apart. But she refuses to let him intimidate her, huffing as they trudge through town toward their house.
“It was just a little fun, Joel. I know you’re not too familiar with the concept, but—”
“Oh, you’re wrong about that, darlin. Me and you? We’re about to have a whole lot of fun.” So it’s like that. She can’t help the excited shiver that runs up her spine at his words, heat already starting to lick at her core. She’s known him long enough to know that when Joel is pissed at her, it can only go one of two ways. Sometimes, he’ll shut down and sulk off, keeping his distance until he’s gotten some sense back in his body to come talk to her. But other times, his anger flirts over into a jagged lust, only simmering to cool when they’re both too sore to bitch at each other anymore, a heaving tangle of sweat and pleasure. And judging by the hard flush she can see peeking out of his shirt collar as they get home, she’d put money on this being one of those other times.
The instant the front door closes behind her, he’s pressing her back up against it, swallowing her gasp as he licks into her mouth. She presses her palms into his chest to try to get some space, but he’s immovable, dragging his lips down her neck and nudging the collar of her shirt out of the way to suck searing bruises into her collarbone. She tugs harshly at his hair to get him to finally take a breath.
“Hey, hey. What about Ellie?” 
“At Dina’s.” And with those few gruff, syllables, he’s back on her, shoving his jean-clad thigh between her legs and pressing up hard into her core, her hips immediately grinding down to seek any kind of relief to the quick-building heat blooming up her spine. 
“You’re something else, you know that? Saw you acting so tough, so cool down at the bar.” His words are a smear across her chest as he works the buttons of her shirt open, dipping down to mouth at the fabric of her bra the moment he gets access, her back arching up into his mouth as she lets out a long sigh of his name. He chuckles into her skin.
“None of them know how sweet you get like this, though. S’just for me, right?” She chokes on a breath as his hand wrenches down the front of her jeans, rough fingers swiping through the slick pooling between her folds. He drags his nose up her cheek as he works one, then two of his fingers into her, her knees buckling when he crooks his digits just so, her cunt clenching hard.
“Asked you a question, darlin. Who’s all this for, huh?” His fingers are pumping into her relentlessly, the squelching noise of each thrust embarrassingly lewd and loud. It’s all she can do to give him a response.
“You– it’s all for you– fuck– only for you– it’s– just you– please–” He laughs, the smug bastard, smearing a kiss to her temple as he continues to fuck her with his fingers, the heel of his palm digging just right into her clit.
“That’s right, baby. S’all for me. Think you can give me one just like this? C’mon, know you can. Be good for me. Just for me.” He doesn’t have to tell her twice, her cunt already spasming around his fingers as she lets out a broken cry, pleasure crashing over her in ebbs and flows as he fucks her through it. He finally relents when her preening whines turn into whimpers, pulling his hand away and sucking his fingers into his mouth as she slumps back against the door.
She’s a complete mess, her shirt hanging loosely off her arms, the cups of her bra shoved down to let her tits spill out, while Joel stands before her still fully clothed, a contrast that sets heat simmering in her belly all over again. She closes the gap between them this time, pressing in for a demanding kiss as she shrugs her shirt off the rest of the way, fumbling behind her back to snap the clasp of her bra open as well. Joel’s hands are on her right away, palming the swell of her tits before squeezing just harshly enough to make her gasp into his mouth, her fingers stuttering where she was working on the buttons of his shirt. He seems to get the hint, swatting her hands away from his half undone shirt and tugging it the rest of the way off by the collar. 
“I need you right now, darlin. Got me fucking aching here.” 
They’re a stumbling swirl of limbs as they fumble upstairs to their bedroom, banging into walls and slamming doors along the way. 
He gets her exactly where he wants her, on all fours at the end of the bed, and she yelps as he wrenches her jeans and panties down her thighs. She cranes her neck over her shoulder, catching a glimpse of him, his jeans rucked down just enough for him to free his cock as he fists himself over her, his other palm kneading the swell of her ass. He nudges his swollen tip through her folds and she shivers at the sensation, trying to press her hips back into him to get more of anything. Joel doesn’t seem to like that though, laying a harsh smack to her ass that makes her nearly jump out of his hold.
“Mind your manners, darlin. Don’t get greedy on me.” She huffs, trying to look back over her shoulder at him but he presses a rough palm between her shoulder blades, forcing her back to bow until she’s collapsing onto her arms, cheek smushed into the sheets. 
He presses into her with one hard thrust, his hips grinding into the plush of her ass as she lets out a broken cry.
“Fuck– always so tight for me– fucking made for me, huh?” She can’t respond to his breathless words, not with the brutal pace he’s setting, the sound of skin slapping echoing through the room as he pumps into her, his leaking tip hitting a spot inside her that has her mouth opening in a silent scream. Suddenly, he’s snaking his palm up her chest, pressing between her tits to pull her up until her back is snug against the warmth of his chest, his lips pressed hotly to the shell of her ear.
“Tell me you’re mine, darlin. Wanna hear you say it.” She lets out a low moan as his hand dips down, the rough pads of his fingers dragging across her clit. Meanwhile, he’s skirted his other palm up to her throat, curling his fingers lightly, a faint but firm pressure making her mind go hazy. 
“I’m yours– I’m all yours– please, I’m so close–” His thrusts are getting shorter, more of a deep grind up inside her that has her clenching hard around him.
“Want you to say my name when you come, darlin. Make a fucking mess– c’mon, that’s it.” It becomes too much all at once, and she finds herself letting out a panting sigh of his name as pleasure finally snaps inside her. His hands slacken where they had been holding her up and she collapses forward, resting her teary face in her arms as he fucks her through her high.
“So perfect for me, darlin– shit– just a little more, huh? Fucking close.” His hips start to stutter against hers, and she does her best to press back against him.
“Please, Joel– want it so bad– c’mon, baby, give it to me.” He lets out a low curse, pulling out and fisting himself once, twice, before he’s painting her ass with his spend. He lets out a hard breath before flopping down next to her on the bed, dragging a hand down his flushed face. She winces as she lets her legs splay out, slinking down onto her stomach. There will be bruises tomorrow, without a doubt. She crooks her face to the side to look at him, still panting, eyes scrunched closed.
“Feel better now?” He cracks one eye open, glancing at her before fully turning on his side to steal a kiss from her lips.
“Fucking menace. Yes, I feel better now.” With that, he flops onto his back again, crossing his arms behind his head. She shimmies over to rest her head on his chest, her chin propped up on his sternum so she can look at him. 
“You better get me cleaned up, Miller. Made a damn mess.” He huffs, bringing one hand down and smacking the curve of her ass, making her yelp in surprise. She tries to kiss away the all too smug grin on his face, but it’s still there when she pulls back.
“I will. But first, I gotta know. Where the hell did you learn to play pool like that?” She lets out an exasperated laugh at that.
“Come with me to the bar next Friday night and I’ll tell you.” A low grumble resounds through his chest, but he’s still smiling as he shakes his head at her.
“You’re on, darlin. I should warn you though. I’m gonna whoop your ass.”
“Looking forward to it, Miller.”
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