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draagu · 11 months

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yo! if you are seeing this these are kind of outdated

I am meaning to update these, but for now if you want the most recent designs you can try searching for any previous art. but! I do not mind at all if you use these versions for art!!

ive done it once again >:D, individuals and notes below: (long)

survivor! an all around skilled slugcat. they took on a lot of survival instincts in their attempts to find their family again. they are generally laid-back, but joke around every now and then. their left arm is severely hurt from either the fall or a scuffle with a lizard (or even a mistake bomb throw (because we all did that, right??)), but can still move, just not at its full force.

nightcat! an extremely smart coder. they are quite shy, but once you get to know them they warm up fast. they have an extreme love for things like cryptids! generally they sneak around the shadows, but occasionally they visit moon (who gave them their scarf! or maybe nsh, undecided) they have a unique talent, that being when then blush they produce little stars sparkles, which survivor finds adorable

monk is an energetic slugcat at heart. they can be calm and serious when its needed, but they love to bounce around and investigate things! once they had saw gourmand crafting a couple times and immediately became invested in becoming their apprentice. they now love to craft and are quite witty at it too. they love to tell survivor the things they learn, which survivor then takes into effect with the limited crafts they know such as bombs and lanterns they have marks on their arms from crafting accidents (they also have a couple lizard pets :D) (considering using monk to represent myself, sort of. slugsona sort of??)

gourmand is an extremely patient and kind-hearted soul. they take the time to help any slugcat they see in need. they took monk under their mentorship to teach them the wonders of crafting, though even monk has been making combinations gourmand could never imagine i tried making them look like a bread loaf (with the lines and everything, but they looked weird) though i hope the warm colors help them seem welcoming!

artificer has an extremely troubled past, the loss of their pups damaged them beyond belief. their reaction is still something im developing, but i think im going in the direction of them sort of blaming themself and becoming almost manic in a way. however! they have a happier present! one of the slugcats (undecided) had found them and worried for their wellbeing, giving them the comfort artificer missed dearly. they still struggle to open themself up to others entirely, but they are working on it they may or may not find their pups again, arti's story is still a draft here buuut they are very close to hunter and gourmand, as well as friends with rivulet and spearmaster they may not also have the best relationship with saint

hunter, a messanger sent from nsh to revive moon, is INCREDIBLY touch starved. they distanced themself from interacting much with other slugcats due to their rot, leading them to be socially anxious as well. they do, however, meet rivulet and spearmaster who help them become more comfortable with interaction. hunter then develops feelings for the both of them and wham pufferfish their bandages were painted over by rivulet and spearmaster with their respective colors :D their pupils are also more like slits compared to the other slugcats

rivulet is a very goofy fish. they have enough energy to last a lifetime. they will never stop building those around them up and creating just an overall positive energy in the room. they love to explore and meet new faces everywhere they go. one of those faces would be spearmaster, who rivulet quickly grew on. they, of course, are very close to moon! as said in hunter's bio, them and spearmaster had come across hunter and yay pufferfish the pearls on their tail represent spear and hunter, both found in shoreline their fins have a slight gradient, though its not required for art :o

spearmaster, created by and close with srs, is a more serious slugcat. their original mission had created an immediate caution instinct to any danger they sensed, and a distaste for five pebbles. they now have a distinct scar on their chest. they communicate via sign language and are very artistic, but are generally less social than the average slugcat. rivulet had helped them meet the other slugcats, but by themself they were never really good at maintaining those conversations. however, if you do get the know them, they are very loveable and soft at heart. the markings on their back sort of represent a fawn in a way, and the bracelets they wear represent rivulet and hunter :D they are also the tallest i may or may not project onto them uh

saint is tired, very very tired. the endless cycle of rebirth they face when trying to ascend has left them annoyed at best. they distance themself from the other slugcats, but they still occasionally try to get saint to join in. saint is close with gourmand they are short but very fluffy. the spots on their tail represent echoes, and the lighter parts of their fur are sort of like snow? markings? they are a little chilly idk their paws are different colors (left and right) they also take a particular connection to lotus flowers

enot is just yeah, they try their best lol. essentially like they act in the dating sim, they just want love. Though this enot isn't constantly going after it. They like to goof around more than that tbh. their design is the same as before i kinda just changed the darkest blue a little. they managed to befriend nightcat, who they goof around with every now and then

also they have eyelashes purely because I asked my friend who likes enot if they want to give them a trait and they said lashes so! aaaaaaaaaaand thats it wow

#rain world #survivor #monk #nightcat #gourmand #artificer #hunter #rivulet #spearmaster #saint #enot #goodness #rain world downpour #rain world art #rain world fanart #i think if i ever do change a design ill just edit this post

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pansyboybloom · 3 months

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manic paralysis is so bizarre. like, i have all this energy and a need to move and talk and think and create and gamble and shop and fuck and and and and but it's too much, it's overwhelming, i cant breathe and i cant think and i cant exist im just a merry go round spinning and spinning but going nowhere. my brain is on the top of the roller coaster but the inertia has vanished. i need to fuck but i cant get it up. i need to create but my brain is so full that it's empty. i need to move but im frozen. i need to live on impulse and surf the biggest waves but it's a fucking wave pool, not a tsunami, and im stuck, im stuck, im stuck. i hate this. I'm a strob light stuck on loop, so full of electricity and neon that it cant function. the mountain is so high that the oxygen is gone. i cant breathe. i want to breathe. why can't i breathe??

#might make this into a poem when my brain decides to FUCKING WORK lmao #actually schizospec #actually schizoaffective #actuallypsychotic #actuallymanic #actually mentally ill

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5eraphim · 1 year

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Please,, I need fluffy headcanons for yandere caretaker Medic <3

this is not as fluffy as you might've hopped... im sorry- but ddjjcffghi i tried anon, i tried

Character: Medic 🕊 (Team Fortress 2)

Rating: M (MINORS DNI)

Content Warnings: yandere, toxic (lol) relationship, imprisonment/kidnapping, drugging, forced intimacy, abuse of power, light medfet

Word Count: 1.5k

MASTER LIST

TIP JAR

(Song Inspo)

In this scenario, whatever it was that left you entirely in Medic's care was some freak accident, a sort of unforeseen accident which left you with no choice but to take refuge under Medic's complete supervision. While you were far from excited to be under the full custody of one so unpredictable, there was simply no other option.

As a result, your status as a mercenary was majorly in jeopardy. After all, how could you expect to be paid to fight when you were too weak to enter the battlefield. You were no longer receiving the necessary funds you once did to support yourself, though Medic assured you that while in such a gracious state, you must only concern yourself with matters of recovery and rest. You were honestly touched as he assured you he would help to support you financially (as in, send money back home, keep you fed and warm, etc.) All debts would be settled once you made a full recovery.

Any initial hesitance of yours to this "new normal" was easily handwaved away by Medic as nothing more than a call to action. You were sick and in need. You were where you needed to be. Therefore, any apprehension on the matter must mean he wasn't doing enough as a caretaker. Therefore, believing with his entire heart, you must need him now more than ever! (He might initially hold onto the idea that if he were to bring you back to total health, you would be so smitten and grateful to him that you would love him back of your own volition, but he is unlikely to deliver on this promise.)

As much as Medic adores the manic energy he derives from indulging in his morally questionable human experiments, yandere Medic has a more hopeless romantic side to him; and has a soft spot for doting on you, and loves the think of these little moments shared with you to be mutual, and you would do precisely the same for him if the situation were reversed.

Though he loves you more than anything, by God, does he love the sight of you so weak and helpless and gets off on the idea of you growing more and more dependent on him until you're practically feeding from the palm of his hand. And he's certainly not above slipping you poisons or sedatives to bend you to his will.

He's always lowkey known he wanted to be your primary caretaker, the one person you love and trust more than anyone else, someone to share that once-in-a-lifetime "I trust you with my life" kind of relationship. Once he gets a taste of caring for you like this, he'll instantly crave more. Now that you can't support yourself, Medic no longer has to worry about you trying to run away or even trying to ignore him now that he's your only source of food and water or any kind of physical well-being.

"If you need care, I'll be here- If you need space, I'll grant this as well." (He won't.)

Furthermore, inhibiting you and forcing you to remain in such a weakened state might ignite his infamously ceaseless curiosity to learn as much about human pain as possible. The resilience, the tolerance, the acquiescence, he wants to know everything. He would slowly increase your dosages of various venoms or poisons to watch with wrapt interest every adorable and sickened reaction you can offer! Medic would happily drive you to the brink of death to drag you back just enough for you to recover what little strength you have left, only to do it all over again. All in the name of love and research.

Despite how miserable his sleep schedule might be, he adores the habit/ritual of tucking you into bed at night and laying you down to rest. While his intentions for treating you are more than a little dubious, this is easily one of his more wholesome displays of affection.

His sleep schedule is so sparse, partially because he genuinely doesn't require much, but as a man with dozens of little pets, he diligently attends to them as though they were his own children. Like any good father, he's always ready to sacrifice his own sleep in the name of attending to his little ones.

Mentioned in lore, he's not only a mad scientist in his own right but also comes from a long line of like-minded folk and would only deem his family worthy of visiting you to keep you company. And what a great way to meet everyone while you're too weary and exhausted to get away!

As his most valued research "partner," he would try to keep you comfortable (relatively speaking) while he's away and will remain perfectly attentive and diligent to your car while physically in your presence.

Any fear, aggravation, or hostility you might display towards Medic would be brushed off, all with a smile and a handwave. It wasn't that you were mad at him or didn't want to be doted on like this. Undoubtedly you were merely experiencing some growing pains, just a bit of discomfort, before you happily found yourself comfortable as his newest pet. If he needed to increase your sedatives to make the transition smoother for you, then he would do what he must.

Any hope of escaping would be futile.

Not only on account of your weakened state, but Medc would take every precaution to fortify your enclosure to guarantee you'll never get out, and no one but him would get in.

As strict as he may be, you'd need to push Medic rather far to persuade him to take away full bodily autonomy. There is little he loves more than how you reach out for him when he returns to your side with food and water after being gone all day. Seeing how your eyes light up not only in finally receiving sustenance after so long but in having someone to socialize with after spending so much time alone in miserable isolation. It's adorable how you're the one to initiate cuddles or kisses, given how emotionally vulnerable you're feeling nowadays. Medic wouldn't dare jeopardize this.

Medic has had more than a few dirty fantasies of coming to you late in the night, perhaps to bring you a soothing cup of tea, or some new reading material, something small and sweet to surprise you, only to walk in on you desperately trying to alleviate your libido. Thinking of you, his poor, beloved little pet, so shaped by his care and influence, you just don't know your body like you used to. And now you're forced to call upon him to finish the job.

"Don't be so shy, my love. I'm only here to help!" (He is not.)

And while he may use your weakened bodily autonomy to his advantage every now and then, slipping hands below your hospital robe to brush his hands against your bare skin, pressing his lips against the naked flesh of your neck to find that pesky weak little pulse of yours. Caressing every inch of soft skin he can get his hands on, he wouldn't dare rob you of your innocence altogether and wouldn't want to take anything too far unless you were to ask, in which case, your word is his command!

He can't help but find a fascinating allure in how your body looks, wearing nothing but a hospital gown with almost nothing underneath, bed bound, surrounded by his machines at all times, gently beeping and whirring. At times like this, he understands his desire to nurture you is less a matter of keeping you away from harm but rather to keep you so preciously weak and needy.

Once he realizes this about himself, he'll be sure to gaslight and manipulate you into being a well-behaved patient, always on your best behavior around him, as only then would he reward you with care or bother to try and take away your pain. Medic would only bring you water and food if you were to say please first, always followed by a polite "thank you" as well. He'll do whatever he needs to keep you docile and submissive.

Loves to converse with you and listen to you talk about everything you plan to do once you're finally well enough to leave the Medical Ward. Medic is a master at knowing how to keep your spirits up just enough to keep from giving into despair, all without divulging to you how he knows none of these plans will ever come to fruition.

"We're going so much closer now, you and I, wouldn't you say? Hard to imagine life before all this, don't tell me you want to return to such a time?" (Like you have a choice.)

No way would he allow you to return to your old life now. He was your life now- bound forever to his side. So at what point did it all come to this? Were you a coward for not fighting back while you still could? How long ago was that, anyway? Were there still people looking for you- indeed, Medic wasn't above suspicion, but even then, so what? It's not like the team could excommunicate such a vital asset anyway.

Nothing hurt more than to question how long it had been since this twisted captivity began. Trying to remember life before all this felt so confusing and foreign. Above the misery, what sickened you was how easily you'd been groomed to understand nothing but obedience.

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sm0kebreaks · 1 year

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anywya im full of manic tma energy rn

#thanks 5hr energy #i know i dhouldnt be drinking h on account of my heart... but oouh....

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jtkys · 8 months

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I LOVE PLATONIC CLOCKWORK AND TOBY ^^ They give off sibling energy fm they seem like they'd play fight for a spot on the couch. Can you do some headcanons :)

𝗉𝗅𝖺𝗍𝗈𝗇𝗂𝖼 𝖼𝗅𝗈𝖼𝗄𝗐𝗈𝗋𝗄 𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗍𝗂𝖼𝖼𝗂 𝗍𝗈𝖻𝗒 𝗁𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖼𝖺𝗇𝗈𝗇𝗌 ！

↳ 𝗋𝖾𝗊𝗎𝖾𝗌𝗍𝖾𝖽 𝖻𝗒 ： 𝖺𝗇𝗈𝗇

↳ 𝖢𝖶𝖲／𝖳𝖶𝖲 ：𝗉𝗈𝗌𝗌𝗂𝖻𝗅𝗒 𝗌𝗈𝗆𝖾 𝗆𝖾𝗇𝗍𝗂𝗈𝗇𝗌 𝗈𝖿 𝗍𝗋𝖺𝗎𝗆𝖺．（ 𝗀𝗂𝗀𝗀𝗅𝖾𝗌 ）𝖺𝗇𝖽 𝗆𝖺𝗒𝖻𝖾 𝖺 𝗅𝗂𝗍𝗍𝗅𝖾 𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘭𝘦 𝖻𝗂𝗍 𝗈𝖿 𝖺𝗇𝗀𝗌𝗍．𝗆𝖺𝗒𝖻𝖾𝖾𝖾．．

↳ 𝗉𝖺𝗂𝗋𝗂𝗇𝗀𝗌／𝗑 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋 ：𝗉𝗅𝖺𝗍𝗈𝗇𝗂𝖼 𝗍𝗂𝖼𝖼𝗂𝗐𝗈𝗋𝗄， 𝗇𝗈 𝗑 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝖽𝖾𝗋！

↳ 𝖼𝗈𝗇𝗍𝖾𝗇𝗍 𝖽𝖾𝗌𝖼／𝗇𝗈𝗍𝖾𝗌 ： 𝗃𝗎𝗌𝗍 𝗌𝗈𝗆𝖾 𝗉𝗅𝖺𝗍𝗈𝗇𝗂𝖼 𝗍𝗂𝖼𝖼𝗂𝗐𝗈𝗋𝗄 𝖿𝗅𝗎𝖿𝖿！𝗂𝗆 𝗌𝗈 𝗌𝗈𝗋𝗋𝗒 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗍𝗈𝗈𝗄 𝗆𝖾 𝖺𝗀𝖾𝗌 𝗍𝗈 𝗀𝖾𝗍 𝗍𝗈， 𝗂𝗏𝖾 𝖻𝖾𝖾𝗇 𝖿𝖾𝖾𝗅𝗂𝗇𝗁 𝗋𝖾𝖺𝗅𝗅𝗒 𝗎𝗆𝗈𝗍𝗂𝗏𝖺𝗍𝖾𝖽 𝗋𝖾𝖼𝖾𝗇𝗍𝗅𝗒 :<

>————-　🌲　————-<

honestly they are literally the perfect pair I’m sorry I WILL NOT APOLOGISE

In my headcanons, Toby’s one of the more quiet and empathetic creeps (although he completely switches up when he has an episode

And clockwork is headstrong, smart, brave, all that jazz.

They’re so siblings coded I can’t

(btw I’m not fetishing or infantilising Toby at all, he is in no way a soft uwu boy that fanon makes him out to be, he’s still a cold hearted serial killer, I just like to add different things to his character :>)

The way that they’re very different makes them perfect friends, they really balance eachother out- while they’re nice to eachother most of the time I think they behave like siblings do

Don’t even try and tell me that clockwork doesn’t do that thing where you go eye level with the glasses or juice to see which one has less so you can give it to your sibling.

BECAUSE SHE SO DOES.

And yes they most definitely fight for a spot on the couch, one that’s got the table beside it and the perfect view of the tv.

And while they do all that

And you know, (playfully) beat eachother up sometimes

(Both of them go fucking feral when they spar. They’ve probably knocked eachother out before and then got scolded)

But they’re truly two of the only people in the mansion who have eachothers full trust

Nah because they’re eachothers ride or die.

IM TELLING YOU!! SIBLINGS CODED!!!!

As SOON as Toby needs her (and vice versa) she’s there; deadass willing to throw hands

My lord she has and will beat the lights out of Jeff before for picking on Toby either when he’s manic, or just having a bad day

they ramble to eachother, tell eachother honest truths

They prolly know eachothers deepest secrets

they’re there to listen to eachothers trauma, sitting in a room with nothing but static and coldness, talking about their past

Or just sharing silence with a mutual understanding that they are and always will be there for eachother when they need it

I think the relationship between them helps but also slightly hurts Toby, because clockwork reminds him so much of Lyra.

The relationship is similar and (atleast within my headcanons) they look similar.

That’s the only thing that clockwork DOESN’T know about Toby. That he occasionally mistakes her for Lyra, thinking that after all these years, his sister is back and that her death was just a cruel joke.

Nope.

My bad I’ll stop with the angst

Okay yeah they fucking steal eachothers clothes, food, etc.

Clockwork and Nina dressed Toby up once

I’m talking full glam. Makeup, cute fit, all of it

And he looked fucking fabulous

(She’ll never let him live it down: she has PHOTOGRAPHIC EVIDENCE.)

She threatens him with said photographic evidence so that he has to get things from the store for her.

LMFAO IM SORRY THIS REMINDS ME WAY TOO MUCH OF ME AND MY BROTHER 😭😭

>————-　🌲　————-<

𝗍𝖺𝗀𝗌／𝗇𝗈𝗍𝖾𝗌 ： 𝗇𝗈 𝗍𝖺𝗀𝗌 ！𝖺𝗀𝖺𝗂𝗇 𝗂𝗆 𝗌𝗎𝗉𝖾𝗋 𝗌𝗈𝗋𝗋𝗒 𝗍𝗁𝗂𝗌 𝗍𝗈𝗈𝗄 𝖺𝗀𝖾𝗌 𝖿𝗈𝗋 𝗆𝖾 𝗍𝗈 𝗐𝗋𝗂𝗍𝖾． 𝗁𝗈𝗉𝖾 𝗎 𝖼𝖺𝗇 𝖿𝗈𝗋𝗀𝗂𝗏𝖾 𝗆𝖾 𝗅𝗈𝗅．

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soloorganaas · 2 years

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Talk dirty to me about Sirius Black and bpd

I've been headcanoning the Blacks (Walburga, Sirius and Regulus all) as bipolar but I've been too. cautious? to write them as such explicitly

but I'd like to

anon my beloved im sorry this took me so long but it gets me in the FEELS talking about bipolar sirius so i gotta ration it out

(i'm gonna make a separate post about writing sirius/the house of black generally as bipolar bc i know its something people are cautious about and is worth discussing itself)

okay heres some little bipolar sirius headcanons. cw for some intense mental health stuff

when sirius is manic as a kid he associates that come down with clashes with his parents. and bc he knows its going to happen he makes it happen. he pushes the boundaries as far as he can and chases the adrenaline and ends up in huge fights until he's locked up in his room, which he will forever associate with a terrifying, all-consuming sadness

he doesn't REALISE that other people's families dont have breakdowns every other week and when he does figure it out he just puts it down to his family being uniquely crazy bc they're just evil like that

he has absolutely zero emotional regulation which gives him a quick reputation of being dramatic and over the top so he leans into it hard

he has more intelligence than he knows what to do with and if he doesnt have something to do with it he'll direct it towards self-destructiveness instead

james is one of the best things to ever happen to him for this reason. james is just as smart and high energy and bc they both obviously have adhd they cant sit and focus on anything that isnt extremely interesting and rewarding (so not classes) for a single moment. thus the most daring and ingenuitive pair of pranksters is born

james is the first and for a long time only person to see sirius when he slips into deep depression. he never for a second judges. after a couple of years he knows how to predict it, and is already waiting with food that will drag sirius out of bed, pranks to plan at the back of the classroom that stop him missing so many classes it raises eyebrows, and an endless stream of jokes and games and distractions that stop sirius sinking into his head too much

james understands sirius at his highs and is there for him at his lows, but remus is the first person who truly understands how deep and dark those lows go

part of the reason sirius is so entranced with remus is bc they share a darkness inside of them they're determined to hide bc the world already expects it to mean they're evil

sometimes when sirius is especially manic to the point of losing his mind he wonders if he is

full moons are oddly the most regulating thing for sirius (which he would never ever admit to remus even if he had the words, but remus notices anyway) because it gives him a fixed, predictable up and down. one night a month he knows he can go wild and break the rules and let his energy out in the safety of his friends

sirius seems like he doesn't want to read bc most of the time he just doesn't have the patience. but whenever he's sitting at the back of the classroom or kept up at night or wandering aimlessly through the grounds and conjures up some idea by his brain working a mile at a minute that obviously needs to be explored, he will, at those points, spend hours upon hours pouring through books to find what he wants

this is large part of how the animagi idea comes up

sirius is on a high for most of september after finally leaving his house for his home. he crashes for most of october (the odd shift in seasons and long dark days don't help). he usually picks up by the time quidditch season and pre-halloween prank season begins

remus is the only one who can calm sirius down. bc he's calm himself, bc he actually understands why sirius is driving himself crazy from his own energy, bc sirius knows this and doesn't feel belittled or dismissed by remus

as such some of sirius's worst moments are when remus isn't speaking to him, or worse, is so angry he's terrified he's going to lose him, bc it's not just heartbreak, it's also his whole anchor

sirius was actually terrible at school until he met james bc he simply couldn't concentrate locked in a room for 8 hours with reg and his tutor. but james is exactly the same and they discover within a couple of months they can learn the entire syllabus partly through picking it up by ear through professors, partly the essays they finish in one sitting in the early morning hours before its due, but mostly through figuring out the magic themselves by pranking each other (and everyone else)

at some point snape does something to terrify the shit out of sirius so much he can't think straight. maybe snape threatens him, or james, or remus, or reg. whatever it is, sirius's mind narrows to the single goal of somehow terrifying snape even more than he did sirius, and he follows every ounce of manic adrenaline without heed to consequences to do so. this is the first time james is truly furious at sirius for something manic he did. it's not the first time remus is, but it's the first time sirius truly thinks he won't forgive him

sirius is more scared than anyone during the war, because he has absolutely no ability to regulate the extreme emotional onslaught he's subjected to. his only support network is remus, and remus simply cannot handle that alone

destroying relationships with people you love out of nowhere in a whirlwind of self-destruction is a peak bipolar symptom that's pretty much all i have to say about the war

sirius doesn't really have manic episodes like he used to during azkaban, bc they suck all of the good emotions out of him. but he does get occasional waves of frustration, of restless energy, of an urge to just do something. its quickly weighed down by the futility of it all, by the reminder he's lost everything and it's all his fault and there's nothing he can do. until he sees peter's photo in the prophet, and from then on he is single-mindedly devoted to that task. there's no sense of what's possible or dangerous or his own limitations, just a manic drive to get out of here

mania is pretty much what drives sirius over the next few months bc he hasn't felt it in so long its uncontrollable. he would never cross hundreds of miles, evade the ministry, track harry down, keep himself alive without it. but he also spends most of that time as a dog because his human thoughts are just too much

he falls into deep deep depression as soon as he stops running which coincides with the exact time someone convinces him he needs to stay locked up in grimmauld place for his own good

now however its 1995, and even if the wizarding world remains stuck in time, the muggle world actually knows what bipolar disorder is. remus, who spent a good amount of the past fourteen years living in the muggle world with chronic depression, and andromeda, who grew up surrounded by people with a similar condition to sirius, is also well connected with the muggle world, and has a husband who's a healer, both figure out that sirius is very ill. sirius is proud and stubborn and also utterly uncaring about his own wellbeing whilst harry is in danger, but remus and andromeda are used to all of this and know how to get sirius the help that he needs, and the result is that he actually does

there are potions for growing bones there are absolutely potions to regulate moods

everything is shit and impossibly hard to deal with for a long long time, not least because azkaban alters your brain so much you have to rewire it through endless positive reinforcement to get anywhere close to healing, and who can do that in a war? but now he has actual medical help, and words for what's going on in his brain which is brilliant now he's actually certifiably crazy moony, but there's so much relief at some point he breaks down crying bc finally he understands even a small part of all the madness people have accused him for a lifetime of

remus is still his anchor even if it takes months to get to a place where they can trust each other beyond loyalty to the order and to harry, and much longer to be as vulnerable as they were before 1981. but when they get there its a thousand times better because now they know themselves and each other enough to slowly, slowly build the stability and peace they both always needed

harry has a kid who has adhd and sirius is the first person to figure it out ❤️

#really put my whole bipolarussy into this one #sirius black #wolfstar #hp #hp meta #meta

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pinkspiraling · 10 months

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vent about sister A! cause things seem to be going downhill

well. welllllllll. sister A (i’ll start differentiating between my sisters again bc it’s confusing) called me today while i was at a friends house. first she called to tell me about a dream she had which was fine but annoying since she knew i was with a friend. thennn she called and left a VM that said “mom sent me money for food, should i use it to buy weed?” and i was like uhh no but also why tf are you asking me. when i’m at a friends house too. then i get a text of a screenshot of her placing her order at the dispensary. listen, i know i can’t judge and i’m not really judging about the weed. i’m more irked that she used my mothers money for FOOD on weed…like…dude cmon. i don’t think i’ve ever asked my parents for money unless it was an emergency or something i had to pay but couldn’t, like a textbook. this bitch asks my parents for money constantly and asks me to ask them for money for her. it’s so out of hand and she’s asking me for money too and she literally has a big girl job with a salary. like get a grip bro oh my fucking god. she is wrecking her relationships right now and thinking it’s fine and that we owe her this overly generous help. she also doesn’t smoke weed. like at all. it gives her panic attacks but she tried it with a friend the other day and was fine so ig she’s smoking now. she doesn’t even drink much. idk wtf is going on. also, as a guy who’s trying to get sober or at least mostly sober, this is a stressful ass thing for me to hear. this is the sister who has bribed me with alcohol knowing full well i have a serious problem with it. this is the bitch that gave me a full bottle of adderall when i asked for a couple pills. she knows i have substance abuse issues she just doesn’t give a fuck. bitch has rifled through her prescription pills offering me xanax and painkillers and shit bc i asked for advil. she’s so fucking toxic for me like she’s so bad for me and idfk i just don’t need her to be smoking around me when i’m trying to stop like this is one of those things that i’ll have to actively turn down and fight against her about and i don’t have the energy like fuck dude. she’s already texted me that she wants to smoke with me but i literally just told her yesterday that i have to quit to start meds. ik i seem to be overreacting but i know her and i know the way she encourages and uses my substance abuse against me and i think shes in a manic episode rn and im trying to get better, i just don't need her shit i have enough of my own

#pink’s word vomiting

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perrys-place · 2 years

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Well look who it is. Martian Girl from Planet V. She's definitely one to eat your heart out, and then your brains, and your limbs, and maybe even your liver if she's feeling fancy.

im ngl i had no idea where i was going with this but gosssssssh i really wanted to draw my own version of martian girl after hearing the song, it tickles me “dangerous girl is rlly pretty and will probably kill you” energy. She is such a manic dream pixie girlboss man-eating monster and like, she can blast me with her lazers anytime she wants.

sketches. I promptly only started this because I wanted to practice again with actual human proportions (even if martain girl is only pretending to me human)

she has mismatched socks and cadet boots on her. maybe ill do another drawing of her full body idk. but it will definately have her interacting with one of the aquabats too (mainly ricky becuz i headcanon that hes the one who sings this song)(when will this man learn to stop simping smh)

a doodle with her having tentacle arms, she was gonna be like a whole mutant culmination of alien designs but i wanted to practice my anatomy with fingers and hands.

anddddddddddd before we go heres a pic of my drawing without the edit. I still think this works well enough by itself with the whole shading, but the editted just gives it the vibe i was looking for you know?

Oh and btw, those little dots above her mouth? Those are her nostrils. Really changes the way you view her character design hm? Thought it would be funny trick. And she probably does use that trick to learn in her victims to eat them.

alright thats all, go home

#Martian Girl #the aquabats!#the aquabats #The Fury of the Aquabats #Ska #album #neoncore #neon #alien #aliencore #my art #fanart #trippy #psychadelic #idk if those are correct tags but thats how it feels

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softquietsteadylove · 1 year

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Thenamesh au.

Gil and Ikaris are in a trainingsmatch. Ikaris wants Gil to use his full power but he refuses, too kind to use it against his eternal fam. So Ikaris decides to be provocative but Gil is unfazed till he starts saying hurtful things about Thena and their dynamic. He goes on and on til Gil looses his patient and starts using his full power while he is extremely angry. He even uses his power on his feets to increase his speed. Ikaris realizes after a few dangerous strong punches that he doesn’t have a chance against him but Gil is in his rage mode and won’t stop even if the others are shouting at him. and before it escalate to a life and death situation Thena is interfering.

"Come on, Gil!" Ikaris taunted, flying around the stadium. "At least give me a challenge!"

But Gil waved his hand through the air, dismissing Ikaris and his attempts to rile him up. "Will you take it easy, man? This is just a training match."

Thena was always telling Gil to be careful of Ikaris' pride. It was both his greatest weakness and his greatest motivator. She said she often found herself fighting Ikaris' pride more than the Soaring Eternal himself.

"Ah, scared you can't take me?" Ikaris chuckled at his brother's laziness as they circled each other. "Is your full power not as strong as we think it is?"

"You don't wanna see my full power, man," Gil continued to dismiss him, which he could see was starting to get to him.

"Five minutes," Ikaris tipped his chin at him.

"No."

Ikaris frowned, his jovial mood vanished. "You can't even do me the honour of an even match?"

"Guess not," Gil shrugged. His eyes drifted to the exit behind Ikaris, "we done here?"

But the Soldier Eternal had seen the slip up, and his opportunity was seized. "Oh, I see."

"What?" Gil frowned. He didn't like the tone in Ikaris' voice.

"Girlfriend waitin' for ye, Gil?" Ikaris asked with an entirely new sense of mockery to him. His eyes lit up at the opportunity to rattle his foe's cage a bit. "Got a hot date after this?"

"Watch it," Gil advised his brother. There were certain things that were over the line--off limits, in a way. And it was pretty understood - if unspoken - that the women in their lives fell into that category.

"Look, whatever floats your boat," Ikaris held up his hands in a play at civility.

"Ikaris," Gilgamesh glared, his fists starting to glow while still gripping his arms folded around himself.

"Is it an opposites attract thing?" Ikaris tilted his head at him in just the most demeaning way possible. "You're the soft to her sharp?"

Gil unfolded his arms, his fists glowing gold, "second warning."

"Ooh, I got 'im mad," Ikaris landed, standing in front of Gil with a borderline manic grin. "Maybe I should see if she's up for joining us? If you don't mind sharing her, that is."

"Last chance," Gil bit out, his feet impacting the ground as his energy built around him. "You say one more thing about her-"

"Relax Gil, she's all yours," Ikaris chuckled, drawing up his fists as he did. "Silent and bitchy isn't really my type."

Gil shot forward, propelled by his Cosmic Energy. Ikaris took to the air, but he couldn't fly fast enough. Gil caught his ankle, slamming him down into the ground so hard the floor cracked under him.

Ikaris grunted and gasped as the air was forced out of his lungs from the impact. He tried to pick himself up, but Gil was on top of him in a second, slamming a foot down into the chest plate of his armour--the only thing keeping him from getting his actual chest caved in.

Gilgamesh gripped the collar of Ikaris' armour, spinning and throwing him into the far wall. The room rattled in his wake. "Don't ever!"

Ikaris couldn't hear him. He couldn't hear anything past the rush of his own blood in his ears.

Gil landed punch after punch, twisting Ikaris' head this way and that. "Don't ever talk about her like that!"

Ikaris tried to charge his eyes, but Gil was coming at him too fast to get them powered up. One of them was almost swollen shut anyway. One of his ears was bleeding and his jaw was close to being dislocated.

Gil raised his fist, layering his energy upon itself until it felt heavy for even him. It would be enough to shatter every bone in Ikaris' body, maybe even plow right through their flawless armour.

Ikaris just looked at him, not one to back down from a fight, let alone one he started, "do it."

"Don't."

It wasn't a plea, so much as a lazy scolding. A slim hand came up and caught Gil's arm before he could land a punch that even Ajak would struggle to heal. He recognised the touch, and his Energy fizzled into the air around them.

"Thena," Gil blinked, his chest heaving with breath as his adrenaline and rage drained out of him. She lowered his fist back to his side slowly.

She looked as if she had interrupted a petty squabble, and not two Eternals out to kill each other. "I've never seen you rise to taunts before, Gilgamesh."

He sighed, looking back at the Soldier Eternal. He didn't exactly feel bad for the damage he'd done. Ikaris deserved it, as far as he was concerned. But he let Thena pull him away to follow her out. "I guess he got in my head."

"Hm," the Warrior Eternal offered neutrally, her hand travelling down his arm until she could take his hand in hers. The last of the tension in him drained out, as if she could take it from him and absorb it for herself.

"Sorry," Gil murmured, not that either of them were entirely sure for what he was apologising. He was walking beside and yet also following her, "he just...the things he says-"

"I am well acquainted with Ikaris' methods in the heat of battle," which was to say that he would say and do anything to rile up his opponents. There was no line Ikaris would not cross.

Gil nodded, offering a deprecating little smile, "I'm sure he never gets to you like this."

Her hand gave his a faint squeeze, and then she wasn't leading them anymore. She came to a stop beside him in the narrow hallway. "I wouldn't say that."

Gil was sure she was just saying that. He had never seen her get ruffled by Ikaris' dogging. He smiled, though, "thanks for tagging me out, anyway."

Finally, Thena smiled at him. "You did say you would be making honey buns, today."

Gil grinned before bursting into a laugh that made him feel infinitely lighter. "Oh, so that's what brought you?--just the promise of sweets?"

"Of course not, Gilgamesh," she admonished him with a smile of her own, "what kind of partner would I be if that were my only reason?"

#Thenamesh AU #or maybe just early Thenamesh #because Ikaris is and had always been a bitch #I have said it before and I'll say it again #Gil would pulverise Ikaris #just destroy him #Thena too #that was why they couldn't have a real fight between them in the movie #because they would have laid that boy flat on his ass #and in this case #don't talk about Gil's beloved Thena #just don't #he's a sweet guy #a peaceful guy #but he would have dragged Ikaris' half-dead body to Ajak's room like #sorry...I guess #and then he just leaves him there #Ajak is stuck with him like ???

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randomoranges · 1 year

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it’s a good thing i started this silly little birthday fic 1.5 weeks ago. this turned into a Thing TM. i had to wait on some events to unfold and then, when i queued this up last night, the weather decided to throw a curve ball at me this morning lol. anyways, oblig bday fic bcs im the coolest person around.

Birthday Call May 17th 2023

Étienne finishes the last of his birthday cupcake when his phone starts buzzing. Figuring it must be some other birthday message, he picks it up without really paying attention to the name on the screen, until he realises that it’s a video call from none other than Edward.

Delighted, he sits a little straighter and makes sure there’s no icing on his face before he accepts the call.

“Well, hello there, handsome; this is a surprise.” He greets with a warm smile as his boyfriend appears on the screen. He takes a moment to quietly mourn the loss of the playoff beard and instead takes in Edward’s clean-cut face. The beard had been majestic. It’s a shame it couldn’t have lasted longer. (Edward wears his beard really well, what can he say. He’s aware that he has a thing, but Edward looks good with facial hair. He should consider growing it outside of playoffs, really. It would be to everyone’s advantage. His, for starters. Even if he’s far and can’t get the full tactile benefits of feeling it drag against his skin. At least he would be able to admire it when they have their little video chats.)

Anyways. He’s digressing. It is a surprise, really. He always looks forward to calls from Edward, even if he’d rather have him here with him. Plus, with recent events happening in Alberta, Edward’s been pulled in different directions as of late and Étienne knows, even if Edward’s never said it outright, that it’s all been taking a toll on him. Hell, if anything else, Étienne has seen it on his face when they have such video calls. (He sees it now too, but he pushes the worry away for now.) (He’s seen the manic edge to his gaze and the unhinged spark in his eyes. He knows the look – has been familiar with it in his own reflection for too long.)

“I wasn’t going to forget your birthday, who do you take me for?” Edward gives him a contrite look, daring Étienne to accuse him of such a fault, but Étienne doesn’t fall for the bait, and instead he hums, content, and twirls a strand of his hair around his finger. He knows Edward wasn’t going to forget (Edward’s never forgotten), but he also would have understood if his boyfriend wouldn’t have had the time – or mental energy to call, what with the current situation in Alberta, the end of the playoffs, and the looming election.

Still, he’s pleased as punch that Edward has managed to find the time to call and that he just so happens to be around for it.

“I take you for my wonderful and thoughtful boyfriend who even sent me a parcel for my birthday.” He smiles again and it seems to do the trick.

“Damn right I am.” Edward scoffs, crossing his arms, before his expression softens a little, “I’m glad you got it on time. I was worried it wouldn’t make it – or that it’d be late.”

“It would have just made the festivities last longer, but I got it this morning; it was a very good start to my day.” Étienne had been surprised by the gift, honestly not expecting anything, but once he’d seen who the parcel was from, he’d eagerly torn through the wrapping to find out what Edward could have possibly sent him, leaving the birthday letter for last. (He’d always been ever so fond of the letters Edward sent him. Those in themselves were gift enough.)

“Good, I’m glad.” Edward even seems pleased with himself and as silly as it sounds, it makes Étienne happy. Edward should always feel pleased with himself, regardless of what endeavour he’s taken on. It’s a good look on him anyways. (Étienne might be a little biased. He doesn’t care. He has impeccable taste.)

A little sigh escapes Edward’s lips after a beat and Étienne notices again how tired he looks. The deep, dark circles under his eyes – the worry lines that aren’t usually there. The pinched set of his brow. The way his shoulders sag ever so, as if the weight of every situation currently happening in his province has been put on him and he can no longer handle it. (And maybe it has. After all, Edmonton is the capital, and he knows that it comes with an extra set of responsibilities he’s ever so thankful he’s escaped.) The light in his eyes seems dimmer as well and Étienne worries from afar, wishing he could magic away all of Edward’s problems.

“How are you holding up?” He asks softly, unable to stop himself. He knows Edward can outright lie to him and that he can water down the truth, but Étienne needs to check in. Assess for himself. Étienne may not be going through the same things as him, but he’s been in similar shoes, and he can be sympathetic if nothing else. He knows what it’s like when the emotions of the people overwhelm and take over your own. Knows what it’s like to feel the euphoria of victory one moment and deep anger and emptiness at a loss the next. It unites and it divides.

He’s lived through his fair share of political unrest, from bitter resentment to the want for change. He’s been there. Tumbled through the whirlwind only to be spat out on the other side, never sure the waters have ever calmed down, trying to regain unsteady footing and stumbling along the way. Therefore, he has a small inkling as to what Edward might be feeling, to some degree, even if the situations aren’t all the same. (At least, if anything, he knows for a fact that Edward is not alone – that Calvin is keeping an eye on him as well and that, if push comes to shove, he can reach out to Calvin if he’s really that worried. That too, he supposes, must be some odd advantage.) (And yes, he knows Calvin is also going through his own ordeal.)

Edward shrugs and passes a hand through his hair and then scrubs it over his clean-shaven face. “You know, same shit, different day. But enough of this depressing talk. I called because it’s your birthday. Distract me, please.”

Étienne chuckles – that he can do. He’s been distracting Edward from his problems for over forty years now and he’s not about to stop anytime soon. In fact, he’s quite good at it, if he dares say so himself.

“Well, if it’s a distraction you want, I’ll have you know that I can be very distracting,” He leans on his palm, propped up by his arm, and puts on his best flirtatious air, before he winks at Edward and then waggles his eyebrows in an exaggerated way. A laugh bubbles out of Edward’s chest and escapes through his mouth, and Étienne grins, pleased that he’s managed to make him laugh for a moment.

“How has your birthday been so far?” His boyfriend prompts, once he recovers from his fit of laughter.

“Not too bad, I must say. A bit on the cold side. Can you believe, it actually snowed?! It didn’t last, but it snowed on my birthday. The travesty of it all.” It had snowed for about five and a half minutes, if that much, but he had been insulted, nonetheless.

Edward laughs at his antics and Étienne is glad that his melodramatics make Edward laugh. It had been his goal, after all.

“Poor baby,” Edward coos, “Too bad I’m not there to keep you warm.” Edward teases, much to Étienne’s delight.

“Such a shame, really. The only thing missing from this birthday so far was waking up next to you, but who knows, maybe some other year.” Étienne knows the universe would need to align in many different ways for it to happen, but he wants to be confident that it could happen in some foreseeable future.

“Anyways, El and I went out for brunch this morning, had birthday cupcakes, got a really nice gift from my boyfriend and Emma’s on her way as we speak. The three of us are going out to dinner and Emma’s staying for the long weekend, so that’ll be cool. Friday, me, Emma and El and some of our friends are going out to some club my sister’s been going on about and that’s about it.” He lists the plans off his finger for a moment to make sure he hasn’t missed anything and then nods to himself. “Yup that’s it.”

“Hang on,” Edward interjects, “Your sister?” He repeats to make sure he’s understood correctly, “Your sister likes clubs? How am I finding out about this now? When the hell did this happen?”

Étienne laughs, “You think I’m the wild child? You’ve clearly never seen my sister hit the clubs then. She has moves like no other and can really let loose.” He watches, amused, as Edward blinks slowly, trying to process the information.

“I’m not sure what to do with this news and I cannot unsee this now. You’re pulling my leg.”

It’s a gift Élyse has, he supposes. Everyone expects it from him. After all, Élyse takes her city job seriously. Élyse is level-headed. Élyse is the good twin. But what people tend to forget is that Élyse also likes the thrum of a thick crowd and the pulse of a beating city. She needs their high as much as he does and lives for a good time. “What can I say; we both love to get lost in a crowd and be surrounded by people. Next time you’re in town, we’ll go out with her.” He laughs at the utter confusion written on Edward’s face and thinks about getting a screenshot of it.

“I’ve been visiting you for over forty years and I never would have assumed that about your sister; wow.” Edward looks as if he’s re-evaluating everything he knows about Élyse. Étienne makes himself a mental note to relay the information to his sister later on. He knows for a fact that she’ll get a kick out of it and that she’ll never let Edward live it down. Ever.

However, he gets it, really. Élyse will give him center floor in a group, but if left to her own devices, she can schmooze as well as he can. Together, they are an unbeatable force, and they can work a crowd to their advantage in a heartbeat. It’s just a shame that no one’s ever really given his sister the chance to do so and that he’s stepped out permanently from his city job.

“In your defence, you only saw her at my place; but I’m pretty sure she can drink us both under the table, keep her head about it, and outlast us on a dance floor. There may have also been the lack of overlap with the types of clubs we were visiting back then. Not sure El would have appreciated crowds of gyrating men.” He grins to himself, making far away plans for a next time when Edward will be in town and inviting his sister to go out with them. He’s not sure either of them would accept, but he can still dream. If anything, he no longer has to keep Edward’s big secret and there are actual places where the three of them could have a good time, now that he and Edward are doing loads better.

“I will never be able to look at your sister the same way ever again.” There may be a hint of awe and fear in Edward’s voice and Étienne chuckles, amused, knowing that Élyse would approve of the second part.

They chat for a while longer, until Étienne receives a message from Emma telling him that she’s nearly there. They exchange goodbyes, Edward wishing him a happy birthday one more time.

“Y’know, when everything settles, if you need to get away from it all for a bit, my door’s always open…” He starts and he kind of hates how hesitant he almost sounds, as if afraid Edward would scoff at the idea, as he worries his bottom lip. “I’m aware you’ll have your work cut out for you and you’ll be busy, but – whenever you want to, you know where to find me.” He adds, quick to recover. “And, obviously, I’m only a phone call away, if you need to vent or just need a distraction. Even if it’s ass o’clock in the night. There’s gotta be some advantage to my insomnia.” He gives Edward a tentative smile and is relieved when his boyfriend returns it.

A myriad of different platitudes run through his head from “don’t worry, you’ll get through this” and “You’ve been through worse – this won’t be what does you in” and even “Please be safe. I hope you and yours stay safe” as he tries to think of some encouraging thing to say, but they all sound flat and lame to his ears. This has never really been their thing. They don’t really offer each other these empty sounding words of comfort, even if in their essence, they all mean the same thing; I’m worried. I want you safe. I need you safe. (I need to know that you’ll be okay. That you’re okay. The idea of something bad happening to you sets my own teeth on fire. I can’t sleep at night because I worry. I pray to a God I no longer really look up to for your safety. Please, please, please be okay.)

“I know and I appreciate it, really. Who knows, I might just take you up on your offer.” Edward tells him with a reassuring smile. In a perfect world, he’d snap his fingers and all of Edward’s problems would vanish. They would be able to start planning Edward’s visit right away, but the confirmation that Edward would like to visit him soon, weather permitting, is enough for now.

“Looking forward to it, whenever that may be.” This is the point where he should hang up, but he doesn’t really want to. Not yet anyways. He wants to say something else, and there are a thousand different thoughts running through his mind, but none of them feels substantial enough to convey everything he still fails to say.

“I love you,” He settles for instead, because he does and because he’s allowed to tell Edward how he feels about him and, he really wants Edward to know and hear it. Especially now. It might not fix anything at all, but it might make him smile and feel a positive emotion for the briefest of moments. Plus, it feels like the only thing he can say to end the conversation, and maybe, just maybe, Edward will understand everything else that it means.

He’ll never know for sure if Edward gets all of it, but his boyfriend smiles softly at him and maybe, in his own way, Edward tries to reassure him as well. “Me too,” He says and then adds, “I’ll talk to you soon, yeah? Now, off with you; you have to get ready for your birthday celebrations so that you can tell me all about your wild and crazy adventures. Make me live vicariously through you.”

Étienne nods and chuckles, promising him that he will and with one final goodbye and one last happy birthday, he ends the call.

FIN

#pc: montreal #pc: montreal west #pc: edmonton #edward murphy #élyse maisonneuve #étienne maisonneuve #fic #projocanondoko #betcha wasn't expecting some random info on élyse eh

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