#but i havent had any good ideas recently. SAD! | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

asexualzoro · 1 year

Text

it’s my 22nd birthday today, and you know what that means...

Lew Writes Wrapped 2022!

its virtually all third life this time, most of which have not been posted on main before. woe, the full weight of my third life obsession be upon ye

blood god, mortal red

(Jan, 1.2k, DSMP, oneshot) (link)

one of the Many minecraft execution fics i have written in my life, technoblade anvil edition

not to start this post off with making myself sad, but man, i miss him.

i remember writing this one all in one sitting at work in january. i think i did a pretty good job with it from an artistic standpoint, and as an analytical piece, i think i hit the mark perfectly. that said, i don’t think i could reread it now. i do think it was fun as a writing exercise to force like, 5 seconds irl to stretch out into a thousand words

yes, the only way out is down

(April, 1.2k, 3L, oneshot) (link)

another minecraft execution fic, third life rendog edition!

IM SO PROUD OF THIS ONE. im so fond of it it’s probably my favorite third life oneshot. ren’s execution makes me fucking rabid and this is just the most direct expression of that.

what’s funny is i actually remember being pretty dissatisfied with this fic when i finished it--there was a lot of stuff i wanted to hit on that i just couldnt swing around to--but when i stepped away from what i wanted it to be and looked at what it was, i realized i liked it a lot

the rhythm of cold fists

(May, 2.6k, 3L, onehsot) (link)

sometimes you get so worked up about the idea scar threw the finale of third life that you have to write a bunch of frenzied words on it

this one is funny bc i think its got the second most hits of any of my third life fic, but the comment number is really low comparatively. i mostly just had fun making the transcript of this scene and then fleshing that out into a full ‘novelization,’ it was a neat writing exercise! i don’t think anything in particular stands out about this one, but i’m happy with it overall

Wooden Mausoleum

(May, 3.8k, 3L, oneshot) (link)

Sometimes you get so worked up about the idea of the unactualized betrayal plotline of the most loyal man in the series that you have to write a bunch of frenzied words about it

okay this is going to sound bad but i keep forgetting i wrote this. i dont know why. i like this fic! one of my favorite paragraphs i wrote all year is in it! and yet??? i dunno.

id love to write a different martyn wins au where the betrayal isnt the sort of ‘mercy kill’ suggested in this fic, bc i still have not recovered from the unrealized betrayal plot. someday i’ll write a martyn wins au where he Means to win

i... still feel something is sort of off with the way this fic ends, but i think ive felt that about a lot of the fic/scene endings ive written of late. i think that ending scenes/fics is just ill have to work on this upcoming year!

might be best to not look back

(Oct, 2.7k, 3L, oneshot) (link)

i’m starting to think all my oneshots are just me getting possessed by different parts of the third life. anyway i had a point to prove about scar throwing, and what might happen were he not being wildly unsubtle about throwing

i can write essays on this fic it makes me feel insane. i HAVE written an essay on it already just recently. tbh, this fic itself IS an essay written for the purpose of analyzing the penultimate third life scene. i have and could and will write more essays on the penultimate third life. this is all i have to say to avoid making this a 1k word post

i think i did what i wanted to pretty well? it was sort of confusing, by virtue of trying to talk about a point your viewpoint character won’t acknowledge, but it was a fun piece over all

missing or obstructed

(Oct-present, 6.3k, 3L, ongoing) (link)

post third life fic but only grian and ren remember, featuring so many sleep/dreaming metaphors, because i lucid dream and have insomnia and it does a lot to me as a person

missing or obstructed has 14.7k words written but i havent fuckin posted most of it bc i got derailed by lamplight. missing i am so sorry i miss you so much but youve been obstructed. i am really excited for how the rest of this goes but i think i have to finish and completely exorcize lamplight from my head before i can go back to it in earnest. i DID post another chapter at 10pm yesterday so i had more of it to include in this wordcount tho,

missing or obstructed has been a lot of fun to write bc i lvoe stupid metaphors. it has sucked to write because it’s forced me to come up with worldbuilding shit for the watchers which has been so much more difficult than i thought. it’s been fun again cuz i love worldbuilding. it’ll be super fun when i finish the current scene i’m sitting and get to introduce martyn pov. i lvoe writing Martyn pov

Lamplight AU

(Nov-present, 20k, 3L/LL, series) (link)

renchanting dnd au. i put ren in a lantern. what else do you need

wadda hell.

i cannot even begin to like--lamplight was literally supposed to be just 20 Questions and thats it, i wasn’t going to write more, but people liked it so much that i was like “sure, i’ll write a bit more” and you guys have been??? so kind. the amount of enthusiasm this fic has received thru kind tags/comments, asks and interest, and even art??? is equal parts deeply humbling and also incredibly likely to give me a god complex. this fic has been so much fun to write and my readers are the whole reason, i cant wait to show you what i have in store for the rest of it

six sentence sunday challenge

i also started a challenge back at the end of march of this year over on @driflew called Six Sentence Sunday. the rules are simple: every sunday, post six sentences you wrote that week.

i didn’t make it every week, but i made it a great deal of them. on occasion, i even posted 12 sentences the week after missing my six, meaning some weeks counted for two.

my six sentence sunday tag on that blog has 28 posts from the year! considering there’s only 52 weeks in a year, i started three months late, and a few of those weeks are actually two, i feel pretty good about the amount of weeks i made. not every week, but basically any week i didn’t have a good excuse not to complete my six sentences. it kept me writing all year, if only a little bit at a time, and i’ll be keeping up with it for sure!

to finish out,

i passed my writing amount from last year (25k) by over 10k words! my total number for this year doesnt even count the 7k or so from missing or obstructed i havent posted, plus an uncounted few hundred words of unposted snippets for lamplight. i’m really happy with everything i’ve done this year!

which… this year i wrote and posted 37,800+ words!

thank you to everyone who has supported my writing all year, as always, it means the world to me. happy birthday to me, and thank you to you for reading!

(birthday wishes and/or reblogs appreciated!)

#lew writes #lew writes wrapped

24 notes · View notes

banditsregina · 10 months

Text

15 questions and 15 mutuals

thank you for the tags 🥹 @gilliandersons @sophiedevreaux

were you named after anyone?

nope! my parents just liked the name. was almost a lauren until they changed their mind at the last minute

when was the last time you cried?

i'm a crier so its very easy for me to cry lol most recently was probably over my cat but give me anything sort of sad and those tears are flowing

do you have kids?

do you use sarcasm a lot?

sometimes, usually only when joking around with people i'm close to.

what's the first thing you notice about people?

eyes and teeth/smile. i find myself staring at people's mouths a lot when i talk to them 😬 not in a 'i want to kiss you' way but in a 'neurodivergent it helps me hear' way so that's generally what im drawn to first.

what's your eye color?

brown or as my friend once said 'hey your eyes match the whiskey bottles!'

scary movies or happy endings?

happy endings forever and ever

any special talents?

i...dont know if i really have any. i consider myself a very good listener for people where they feel its easy to talk about anything with and a good sounding board for them to bounce ideas off of. 🤷🏻‍♀️

where were you born?

wisconsin. midwest baby!

what are your hobbies?

oh man.. reading, watching tv, doing a puzzle, playing games. if i have the time and energy, making costumes/dressing up for things like ren faire!

have any pets?

my cat, dottie, the queen of my household

what sports do you play/have you played?

does marching band count... or tennis for fun lol

how tall are you?

5'2''

favorite subject in school?

i loved school so most of them! but english, music, french class the most. but science and math were fun too! i loved my environmental science class a lot a lot.

dream job?

i've never really had a 'dream job' exactly but im drawn to entertainment in any form. theatre, music, film. so something in that industry would be great to get back to!

tagging: i feel like i've seen this all over my dash already so if you havent done it yet, consider this your tag!

#me #dottie

4 notes · View notes

iwadori · 3 years

Text

When they neglect you for another girl Part 4 (Sakusa)

Part One Part Two Part Three Part Four Part Five

Word Count: 2.6K

Genre: Angst to Fluff

masterlist

AN: YES I DID PUT MYSELF IN THIS STORY! SUE ME. This is basically inspired by a random conversation i had w the great @teesumu, so this is basically for you doll <3

Sakusa:

You and Sakusa have been together for a around 10 years and love eachother immensly.

However recently Sakusa has been busy and you havent really had much time together lately as he claims been busy doing loads of visits with his new agent.

But of course, being the loving partner you are you wanted to revive the spark in your relationship.

You have been seeing a lot of people on social media posting their aesthetic ‘picnic dates,’ and you knew that this was something that appealed to you before it was ‘on trend.’ Kiyoomi immediately came to your mind once you had the idea of going on a date. You knew that you haven’t be around each other lately, as Kiyoomi always had either a ‘meeting’ or some sort of ‘interview’ that his new agent “Empress” has set up for him.

You didn’t really know Empress that well, just that she was ‘good at her job,’ a ‘hard and dilligent worker,’ and a ‘raging hottie’ with Atsumu’s opinion being the last one. You weren’t suspecting her to have any malicious intent towards you or Kiyoomi, since you knew that he had a great judge of character. But it was just odd, that every time Kiyoomi was running late or having ‘super-secret’ conversations on the phone it was always because ‘my agent set up this,’ ‘my agent set up that,’ and that’s what left you a bit wary.

As you were scrolling through your phone you see a calendar updating saying : Next Week‘ A DECADE AGO WE FELL IN LOVE.’

10 years. How could you forget? You and Omi have literally been together for a decade. You think back to the decade of madness and love you’ve been through together, smiling fondly to yourself but then you think about where you are now... barely even talking to each other, only mainly seeing him when he comes home from work.

You need to fix this. Or at least make an attempt to get you and Kiyoomi talking again. So, the only thing you can do, is plan that picnic.

You spent the rest of the day planning your anniversary picnic. ’It’s going to be great,’ you think to yourself, you have a list of all Omi’s favorite foods you're going to make him and bring and you are probably going to pick up a few board games and maybe even get some paint supplies. You and Kiyoomi used to paint a lot together, with the two of you not being the best of painters, but you enjoyed eachothers company non the less.

Everything was sorted...for the most part. All you needed to do was get Omi there, and it’ll all be okay. Right? As you were bubbling and looking for more picnic inspo, you hear your front door open which made you even more excited to tell your boyfriend your plans.

As you rush to go greet him, you see he’s on the phone making you roll your eyes. “No Empress it won’t work, we need this sorted by next week. Okay? Next week.” he says in an agitated way. He hangs up the phone and sighs, shoving off his duffel bag.

“Hey Omi, how was your day?” you say a bit hesitant, noticing his annoyed mood.

“Fine” He said dismissively, aiming to walk past you aiming for your bedroom.

“Oh well I have something amazing planned for ne-” you try to say following after him.

“Can we not do this right now Y/N,” he says again turning too look at you making you frown a bit, all you wanted to do is surprise him with your plans and have a day out with him. After noticing your sad look he finishes with “it’s just that Empress she’s bee-”

“I don’t want to hear about her.” you say bitterly folding your arms, Empress is the last person you want to hear about right now “God Omi can’t you just care about me? For once.”

“I do I-”

“You don’t anymore,” you say, with all the emotions and feelings you’ve been just supressing from a while coming up. You don’t even know how you got from point A to B with this conversation, but there's no stopping now. “I feel that, for a while now we haven’t been how we were before when we were just Y/N and Kiyoomi. Instead of how we are now. Just Y/N. Then Kiyoomi and Empress.”

After hearing his agents name, Kiyoomi’s name contorts to confusion “Empress? What does she have to do with anything?”

“How can you not see? For the past month all it’s been is ‘Empress this’ ‘Empress that,’” you complain “Having your super secret conversations with her, like god Kiyoomi can’t you see a problem with this?”

“It’s not like that Y/N, we’re just work partners” he says looking a bit annoyed “Just business.”

“Just business? So Kiyoomi, what were you talking about on the phone earlier” you say with your voice slight accusingly.

“Umm I, I can’t really say?” he says more of a question then a fully assured statement. You squint your eyes at him and scoff.

“What is going on with you Omi?” you say “are you cheating on me with her is that it?”

“No, no of course not Y/N! How could you even ask that?” he frowned at your question making your chest hurt, since deep down you knew he could never do that to you. Could he?

“Well tell me then, what were you talking about?” you ask again.

“I can’t say..” he finishes

“Well I can’t stay.” you say and his face goes back to confusion “Here. With you.”

“What do you mean Y/-”

“I need a break or something. I just can’t be here right now.” You start to rush and pack a big of things whilst Kiyoomi just stands there.

After you pack up your stuff, you look back and see Kiyoomi just there. Standing. You were upset, you kind of wanted him to rush after you and beg you not to leave, but he was just there. Standing. So you put the hand on the door and just before you leave you turn back and say “bye Sakusa, see you later?” to which you see him slightly nod at.

When the door shut, Kiyoomi starts to cry. After hearing you call him by his last name really twisted the knife that was already in his heart. You haven’t called him that since you were like 15. He knew what you wanted; he knew you wanted him to rush towards you and beg you not to leave, but he didn’t. He couldn’t. But what he could do is call the one person he only could call.

After a few rings, he hears “What do you need Saku?”

“She’s gone, she left.”

“What do you mean she’s gone, did you tell her?”

“No I didn’t tell her. And that’s the problem, Empress she think-”

“Saku, don’t worry about it. I’ll handle it.”

“You’ll handle it?”

“Don’t I always?”

He couldn’t argue with that, he just had to trust that Empress could sort it. “And also, don’t spend the week with your head up your ass crying, you’ve got a lot of grovelling to do kiddo.”

He nodded even though she couldn’t see him, as he knew that what just went down needed to be resolved, fast.

Meanwhile, on your end. You’re a mess. Sobbing all the time, tissues are your best friend, you’ve been waiting just waiting for a message or a call, or some form of communication. You just wanted to feel wanted by your boyfriend (can you even call him that now.)

You spent the rest of the week at your parents, immersing yourself in your work and doing ‘self care’ things, trying to forget all about the argument you and Kiyoomi had.

One day, you receive a letter, it wasn’t delivered by a mail man though. It was slid under your door, in a golden envelope sealed with a red hot wax seal. It read:

‘Dear Y/N,

My sweetheart, im sorry for how the week has been and I know a letter with only a fraction of how I feel won’t make up for how I acted that day. But im inviting you to join me at the Gardenia Botanical Gardens at 2 pm tommorow, to celebrate our 10 year anniversary.

I know there is a big chance, you may not want to see me and I understand but please. I love you, so so much, that words can’t even describe. But I need you to see me apologise and I need to make it up to you.

I hope to see you there, I’d wait the whole day for you. If you don’t show, I understand.

Sincerely, Sakusa Kiyoomi

P.S The theme is ‘summer hot day, tea with the queen’ - Atsumu’

You smile at the letter, but wonder if you should actually go or not. You did want to see him of course and get this all resolved, but you had your own plans for your anniversary which wouldn’t of been spoiled if he didn’t withhold his super-secret phone calls.

It took you hours to contemplate on what to do, but you decided to just sleep on it and see how you feel tomorrow. In the morning, you knew what you wanted to do. Of course, you had to go, at least to hear him out and see if he really did cheat on you or not. For all you know he’s inviting you to tell you that he’s going to run away with his agent and his secret kids they had together. You shook the negative thoughts from your head and just repeated your mantra ‘hope for the best and prepare for the worst.’

When you got there, you didn’t exactly know where he would be but he said ‘botanical gardens’ so of course you decided to just wander around there. It was nice walking around and just smelling the roses, and seeing the pretty scenery.

“Excuse me ma’am,” you hear someone say tugging on your leg “um that mister over there told me to give you these.” Looking down, you see a small boy who looked about the age of four with a crumpled up bunch of roses handing them to you.

“Oh thank you,” you say giving the kid a head pat “where is this ‘mister’ might I ask?”

“He’s over there!” The kid pointed behind him and you look to see Kiyoomi sitting under a white gazebo which is surrounded in your favorite flowers and the table is filled with food.

You walk over to your ‘boyfriend,’ with him not noticing your present yet. When you reach him you say “I think she stood you up buddy,” you joke making him jump abit startled.

“Y/N!” he exclaimed, instantly beaming “You came you made it!” he stood up and pulled you into a hug, which you return before you remember why you came here in the first place.

“Oh I-” he says awkwardly

You decide to sit down pulling him down with you. You kind of sit there in uncomfortable silence, for a while until you both say.

“So I-”

“What are yo-”

You both laughed at your simultaneous comments, before Kiyoomi looks at you letting you speak. “What did you want to bring me here for?”

“I didn’t want, what happened last week to happen Y/N I-” he says looking a bit panicked “It wasn’t supposed to go this way.”

“Then how was it meant to go Sakusa.”

“Y/N, please don’t call me that, I know I made you upset but pleas-” he starts before getting distracted again “Y/N, I called you here to say a few things..”

“Them being.?” you ask a bit impatiently.

“I love you. I love you so much, you don’t even understand. Ever since I saw you at my volleyball game in our first year, in the stands just cheering us on. I knew that from that day, after I scored the winning point and our eyes met, that we were destined to be together. I just love you so much Y/N”

“Omi I don’t understand I-”

“Just let me finish please, It’s taken a while for me to say this. And trust me, there’s been so many times when I wanted to just say ‘hey Y/N let’s get married,’ but I couldn’t I was scared, and I wanted it to be perfect, so perfect. Because you deserve the world Y/N. That’s why I got Empress to help, I know that our conversations may seem odd, but I love you and she knows that she just wanted to help trust me. And she did, all this wouldn’t of been done if it wasn’t for her. But anyways Y/N what I waned to say was I love you and I love you and I-” he rambles on loosing track of his words.

But in the midst of his speech, you hear all that you needed and responded with the only way you can.

“Yes.” you say simply, with a growing smile on your face.

“Yes?” he repeats confused “What do you meann ye- ohhh" Kiyoomi blushes embarrased that after all that he ended up ruining the thought out proposal he wanted to give you with his ramble.

“Im sorry Y/N, I didn’t mean to say it like that I wanted it to be perfect and I-”

You shut him up with a kiss making his eyes widen as he reciprocates it anyways.

“What did she say?” you hear someone shout from a far, and you look over to see the MSBY Jackals all standing there with shit eating grins on their faces.

“I said yes!” you yell back, to which they all cheer and rush towards you guys giving you both hugs and slapping Kiyoomi on the back.

As the boys celebrate Omi finnally do what he’s been planning for ages, you get approached by Empress who awkwardly walks up to you. “ I didn’t want to leave the impression that me and Saku were any sort of thing?” she says

“Yeah I think it was definitely a big misunderstanding, it’s just that Omi was never around and whenever he was he was just talking to you and you know how it is.”

“I definitely know, I’d feel the same way if my boyfriend did that to me.”

“Oooh boyfriend?” you ask her feeling nosey on her romantic life.

“Yeah boyfriend. You know iwaizumi hajime... the trainer?” she says smiling a bit when she said his name.

“The trainer! Nice.”

The rest of the night was fun and was basically an engagement party for you and Omi all you and friends just partying and celebrating yours and Omi’s love for each other. “Omi” you say getting his attention “Happy ten year anniversary babe”

“Happy anniversary, I can’t wait to spend the rest of my life with you.”

After the party you spend your months now planning for a big fat wedding, with the help of your new found bestie, Empress (who you obviously misjudged from the start.) You and Omi could never be happier, every thing was back to how it was before, maybe even better. And you definitely spent at least two Saturdays a month going out for picnics and it was now a tradition in your relationship, so in the end you did get your ‘aesthetic picnic date.’

AN: WHAT DID U GUYS THINK??

#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu x reader comfort #haikyuu fluff #sakusa x you #sakusa headcanons #haikyu angst #sakusa fluff #sakusa x reader #sakusa oneshot #haikyu sakusa #signedwithane😌

1K notes · View notes

solardrink · 3 years

Text

that song is playing again. ranboo jokes about being a mirror for halloween to really scare people. we laugh in parasocial concern but mostly relate. ranboo considers going to a furry convention. he has a gaydar for his fans. we can tell. someone took his cookie. we all know it was tubbo. he has raised over 200 thousand dollars for people in need. he has randomly lost his train of thought. nevermind, its about merch. the ding of collecting ores in minecraft plays over and over. hes leaking merch ideas. it is so late holy shit. this man is going to pass out i dont believe for a second hes going for 10 more hours. he says he has a bunch of hours left but I Do Not Believe him. there is so much love and support here. people talk about their experiences and funny stories and people all over the world, enough to fill a stadium. react and smile. ranboo misses chipotle, poor man misses his tex-mex type food from cali. hes talking about benchtrio and i am Listening Intently. theres a hierarchy apparently. ranboos at the bottom for doing things suggestions. L. tubbo and ranboo are both weak to tommy if he says no to something which is very funny to me. ranboo is talking about their dynamic like rock paper scissors. tubbo and tommy would rather die than go somewhere a mile away. ranboo is most definitely the mom friend. he brings extra battery packs and masks for his friends if they need them. this boy is so endearing. tommy can ask for any of ranboos stuff and ranboo will probably give it to him cause he cant say no. ranboo cant be mad when tubbo ate 3/4 of his chocolate because he didnt say how much he could have. ranboo stares at a piece of iron ore for 3 minutes because he doesnt know where it came from. "nothing and everything is going on." hes asking if a food was made from chemicals but had the same flavor and shape and texture would we eat it? i have no idea it sounds kinda weird but maybe. ranboo says if it tastes good he would and i kinda expected that answer. he is yawning and i am yawning. i feel like this song has played already. i feel like this song has played already. he believes that milk before cereal is obviously wrong but hates arguing his case- a real libertarian centrist i expected nothing less from the man who orchestrates c!ranboo. hes now talking about people yelling about content creators and im lowkey caught offguard cause i wasnt listening. i miss tubbo. his phone fell why does this happen so often. "GIVE US SOME MONEY" hes talking about the mcyttwt thread and i fuckin agree it is the funniest thing holy shit. that also means that he has seen the covid stuff about wilbur and the "white, gay, man, loona stan, pick a struggle tweet" about tubbo and i dont how to feel about that tidbit. i have also read all of it, if you havent please do. i expected nothing less from ranboo to enjoy it. he is permenantly talking in his sleep which is interesting and also concerning. oliver has bought amongus plushies. someones cat is watching the stream. ranboos favorite cat breed are the ones that look. just kidding its black and white ones. his worst recent nightmare is him messing up on a facecam stream which is a bit sad. i put a D: in chat to express the kind of parasocial emotion i feel. he would steal your chips. he would reimburse you because he would feel bad though. ranboo read "effortlessly" wrong which is very ironic and funny. he messed up saying it again. hes quitting the internet. he had a pretty bad nightmare :(. i want tubbo when is he coming back. ranboos getting better at bridging in minecraft. he did pretty well imo. ba bow bow now now now now. thanks for the 25 tier ones. he will paint his nails eventually. one day. one day. im teasing he will most likely do it maybe. he would probably pierce his ears and i am excited about that a normal amount. ba now bow na bow now. ouch facial dysmorphia ow streamer ow. this sucks. i am feeling trauma dumped on but this is okay. dono is asking where would he get chicken nuggets and fries and he doesnt know. i want chicken nuggets. WHAT THE HECKKK THE BURNER WHO

POSTED THE MCYTTWT THREAD DEACTIVATED CAUSE RANBOO TALKED ABOUT THEM :(( crap. ranboo didnt mean that to happen but its ok :( there are so many hearts in this dam chatroom. im glad there are so many hearts here. tens of thousands of people here being sympathetic and kind. ranboo is not sleeping. invisibility and shape shifting are the super powers he would pick if he could. we know why ouch. 100% of proceeds are going to charity: water. people are intimidated by ranboo. i am not. wilbur is a little scary though. ranboo doesnt know his personality type, i dont either i think i took the test at least twice but i still dont remember what i got. this song is playing again. im not mad angry people by lemon demon is one of my favorite songs. pepeDS. ranboo our variety streamer <3 my favorite non-mcyt. but actually can ranboo be considered a mcyt. because all his yt videos are not mc they are in fact cooking/furniture building/internet funnies. ranboo is going to have a gummy. yum. donos cat died and is still dead- which leaves the comical opportunity for the cat to be resurrected. WHAT HE DOESNT LIKE CHEESECAKE THAT MUCH BECAUSE THE AFTERTASTE? this man mustve had dairy free cheesecake wtf where is he getting his cheesecake from. hes very mature talking about his facial dysmorphia in a technical manner and i find that admirable. ou ch he knows what it means to use unconventional methods to fix facial dysmorphia ow ow ow fuck im a poc and i used to be self conscious of my nose when i was younger shit. "i bet you think ketchup is spicy white boy." i am going to sob. hes leaving michael headcanons to the writers/artists <3 i think that is pretty neat. chat he said piglin not penguin, dumbasses. im kidding i love chat this stream they are too hivemind and silly to be anything but well-behaved besides spamming. he is a hufflepuff. so am i. i took that damn quiz three times. he has not tried beans on toast because he is scared. i would be too. dono reminded all of us when dreamworks tried to make sexy fish. ranboo is upset now. im not mad that lady fish was pretty hot. ignore that. he wants us hot fish enjoyers out of his chat. im not leaving. i cant breathe im having so much fun. 5 more minutes until 12 hours. im not sure if this man has taken a bathroom break once. woo theres a hype train. hes talking about that one tiktok audio where theres an edit of minecraft streamers being told by their chat to say ____ rights or else they are homophobic. ranboos right its hilarious. i think i might end this post now smile bye bye :)

#ranboo #mcyt #dsmp #dream smp #ignore the parts where i put my opinion about random crap #long post

136 notes · View notes

aestheticsuwu · 3 years

Text

🍃Blue Lagoon 🍃

@judahlux I wrote this , hopefully you like it

.... . ......

Coming out of the hut where they kept the wood safe and dry for the fire . Mr.Miyagi asked him to cut some , laying down the wood and starts to sectioned them to be chopped .

The old man was inside probably organizing their mess , he will blame it on Daniel later .

The omega himself was laying in the hammock , he was about to tease him about not doing anything like always until he looked at his direction .

He froze .

Daniel looked beautiful , His dark skin shined alongside with his hair . His lanky arms were behind his head , Johnny felt like he couldnt breathe.

Daniel turn his head toward his direction , the smile on him made johnnys chest feel warm . He looked gorgeous until the omega opened his mouth .

" You know , you should do less starting and do more working . "

Spluttering in anger he throws sand in his direction , all he got back were more gigles .

Beautiful ,huffing at the idea more like little punk .

Focusing on the wood until it was done. Sweat was dripping down his back , the sun was bright making his skin rosy from the heat .

" Daniel-san go get more fruit for dinner . Johnny-san come help Miyagi to move pot . "

The old man walked right back to the hut , following him to help him . But he couldnt help to look back once more were Daniel was heading .

Shaking his head and blaming the heat for his behaviour .

After helping Mr.Miyagi, he sat watching the old man finishing lunch for the three .

" Old man , do you ever look at Daniel and just feel annoyed .

" Daniel-san ? No , he just full of energy like puppy . Why ask Miyagi ? . "

" I dont know today he just .... nevermind . " He couldn't find the right words to describe it and he kind of felt embarrased .

They waited for a good while for Daniel to come back but he never showed up .He didn't want to admit but he had been worried , Maybe he had gotten hurt on his way back .

" Johnny , go ." Sometimes he felt Mr.Miyagi could read minds .

" ME !? "

" Hai , check the river . "

Springing up from his spot and started heading towards where Daniel had left earlier .

He told himself the gut feeling of being worried was because the punk was making them wait on lunch .

The omega was knowhwere to begin with , tired walking aimlessly he went to the river where Mr.Miyagi had mentioned .

Catching sight of the headband that Mr. Miyagi gave to daniel when he presented and sinced then he never not once wored it .

Never once to give up the chance to scold the omega he went forward to scare him but the second time of the day the words got caught on his throat .

He felt his face get hot , his mind was confusing him from the thoughts he recently been getting ever since his status was presented as Alpha .

His mind been catching every little thing that Daniel would do . How he whined of not getting to do hard work and then continued to whine when he did .

How when he would eat he would get all the fruit juice all over him when he was in a rushed to go swim .

Or how his wolf kept reminding him to get bigger and stronger , and felt big pride when the omega would notice .

Not realising how sometimes at night he wants to hold him and touch him without feeling ashamed .

" Johnny !! Come join me the water is fantastic !! .

" While you were busy having fun swimming we were starving . This is why you get on our nerves . "

That pout wasnt going to make him reconsidered his argument .

" Johnny cmon , just real quick ."

He didnt know why he felt like doing what the omega wanted , his inner wolf making him go against his word .

Daniel wasn't lying , the water felt amazing to the days weather . Diving in to take a quick swim , rising up to shake off the water .

The boy infront of him was smiling , he himself couldnt help but to smile . Daniel started splashing water , that little punk tried to swim away from him but he latched on to his waist .

Both were face to face , those eyes reminded him of the book with pictures Lucille had taught them words and animals . Even since he was young he thought that Daniel had ressemblance to a deer .

Yeah , Daniel was bambi . His bambi .

He surged forward to kiss him , the need was killing him inside and once he did Johnny knew he couldn't get enough .

He felt happy .

Until he's pushed him away by angry looking eyes .

" Why did you do that , i was saving my first kiss for an alpha . "

" Im an alpha ! . " Was Daniel dumb , because he clearlt wasn't a beta or omega . If he was he would think Miyagi would have told him .

Daniel looked frustrated , but what he said next made him feel sad that soon turned into anger .

" But it wasn't supposed to be you , now you ruined it ! "

" You know what, I was doing you a favor . Nobody would want to kiss someone that looks like a wet rat ! "

He shouted as he got out of the water , he couldn't believe how stupid he was to kiss Daniel.

" Hey ! Not like your any better ! looking like a .......... "

Saving him the excuse to find the word to insult him with he continued to fight .

" oh yeah , then how come your always drooling as you stare at me . "

But that kinda didnt help when he's been lately staring .

" Haha thats the other way around ! . "

" whatever "

Mood being ruined walking past by the basket full of fruits not even bothering to help Daniel.

Other alpha ? Why would Daniel want another alpha . It made his stomach upset and his hart ache , arriving to the hut he quickly goes up to his bed not longer having a appetite.

He was grateful that Mr.Miyagi left him alone for awhile and Daniel didnt kept being his annoying self .

When refusing to eat dinner , Mr. Myagi became worried .

" Johnny-san San okay ? "

" Yeah , just not hungry ."

" Miyagi make tea for maybe rut , just in case . "

Mr . Myagi was suprise after arriving on the island that his suppressants tea made it along with Books , knives and some clothing had not once touch the water .

Miyagi himself was a beta he didn't need the tea but Lucille was an omega so she did get her heats once every 3 months .

When lucille passed away when her bite mark started to fade meaning her husband had passed away . With her time left she taught Johnny and Daniel everything she knew .

Johnny was the first to present soon after Daniel presented but it was harder having an alpha around . Myagi knew a smell of an omega in heat made an Alpha Hungry for lust so he started to give them teas to help them with their heats and ruts .

The tea helped him a liitle but his wolf was restless knowing the omega rejected him making his scent stronger every minute he dwelled about it .

In the middle of the night he felt someone get in his bed , the smell of vanilla and cinnamon with a tint of sadness invaded his nose . Opening his eye to see Daniel crawling in .

" What are you doing , were not allowed to be in each others beds. "

Turning around quickly to see if Miyagi had woken up .

" Im sorry about earlier . "

" Its whatever , stop it .stop . Im not gonna fall for your bambi eyes ! . "

" My bambi eyes ? You havent called me bambi in a long time . Can you start calling me that again ? "

" I thought you said that you hated it . Are you blushing ? " .

" Stop asking questions . "

Daniel moves forward , he expected a kiss on the cheeck but he was wrong once he felt lips on his own .Soft and chaste, it drove him crazy just by a 2 second peck .

" We can kiss whenever you want , but just that okay . "

Nodding , leaning forward to kiss the omega . It was hard to refrain himself while having daniel under him .

Holding daniel in the verge of falling asleep , he wished they wouldn't leave or that no one would could rescue them from their home .

The thought of not being with Mr. Myagi who raised and was a father to them left him sad but Daniel being with someone elses droved him mad .

He didnt want to share what was his .

TBC.

#lawrusso #teen lawrusso #lawrusso au #johnny lawrence #daniel lawrusso #mr. miyagi #lucille larusso #blue lagoon au moodboard #blue lagoon au #blue lagoon #part 2 #ralph macchio #william zabka #movie au moodboard #abo au #alpha/beta/omega dynamics #alpha/beta/omega verse

58 notes · View notes

falcons-wings · 3 years

Text

an easy mission

sam wilson x reader

summary: the reader gets hurt on a mission where they received bad intel (this is a terrible summary but we move)

warnings: fighting, injuries, blood, swearing, guns, knives (i think that’s it?? pls tell me if there’s anything else)

wc: 1.5k+

masterlist

a/n: i’ve written for quite a few different fandoms but never marvel for some reason idk, but i love this man with all my heart and he does not nearly get the love he deserves so i thought i’d write this little work for him - also i havent written in a while so im rusty so apologies in advance - hope you enjoy :)

This was meant to be an easy mission. A nice break from all the stress, fighting and pain you had been experiencing recently since you started working with Sam and Bucky. You had even been sent in on your own to where the target was supposed to be whilst the boys kept watch because it was, as Sam so incorrectly said, “a simple in and out job”.

You had decided it was not a simple in and out job.

The target you had to extract was only meant to have two of his men guarding him, hence the easy part of the job, but the twelve guys who were now all either pointing guns at you or in fighting stances, proved that information very wrong.

It didn’t take long for all hell to break loose - there were gunshots flying everywhere as you began taking out some of the men closest to you. You threw a couple of knives from your harness at two of the men who had guns, not even looking to see if they had hit the mark (but you knew they did - you never missed) before running at the guy closest to you. A swift kick to his stomach followed by an elbow to the face was all it took to for him to go down, allowing you to focus on the other guys now approaching you - and a couple more knives were thrown in succession, getting rid of all but one of the shooters before you engaged in hand to hand combat with two of the assailants.

“Y/n? Is everything alright in there?” Sam’s voice spoke through the comm.

“Oh, everything’s just peachy Sam, I just want to say-“ You felt a sharp pain in your abdomen, interrupting your train of thought and speech, but your momentary pause cost you when one of the guys you were fighting got lucky with a hit to your face. Annoyed that you had let down your guard and most likely had a broken nose now, you kicked your leg out towards his shin and as he tripped slightly, you elbowed him in the gut and pulled his arm down as you rolled towards the floor, flipping him over so his front collided with the ground hard enough to knock him unconscious.

You turned your attention back to the remaining assailants when you registered Sam shouting your name over the comms.

“What Sam? I’m a little busy.”

“You stopped mid sentence I thought something had happened, we were about to come and see if you needed help.” You could hear the worry in his voice but the stubborn part of you still refused to ask for help from them even though they were your friends and you knew they wouldn’t think any less of you.

“No it’s all good here, I was just going to say that we’re never listening to your informant ever again and if we do, you’re getting sent into the hideout.”

“What? Why?”

“Well it turns out the two guys guarding the target,” you tackled the last armed guy to the ground, stabbing him in the chest in the process before getting back up and approaching the last couple of people left, “was actually twelve so I’ve not been having the best time here.”

“Shit. We’re coming in.” You could hear him saying something to Bucky but you didn’t care as this was when you noticed the original target was no longer in your sight, only two very angry looking dudes.

“No I’ve got this handled, but I’ve lost the target - he must’ve got away whilst I was distracted. Sorry.”

“Don’t apologise y/n, Barnes is going to get the target and I’m coming to you.”

Before you could respond to him, the last two guys came charging at you. You ducked underneath the arm of one, dodging the knife he had trained on you, and kicked him in the back with enough force that he fell to the floor and didn’t get back up. This left only one who swung at your face, which you sidestepped out the way of, but unfortunately failed to see him swing his leg out to kick you in the stomach. You stepped back, doubled over in pain for a moment, but quickly recovered and took out the last knife from your harness, throwing it at his chest with perfect accuracy as he made another approach at you.

The body fell to the floor just as you heard loud footsteps running into the room behind you. Still on high alert you spun to fight this next person but instead relaxed when you saw Sam run into the room and stop in his tracks when he looked at you.

“I did say I had it handled.” You smiled smugly at him, ignoring the stab of pain from your nose at the movement, but the smile quickly faded when he still didn’t say anything, not even one of his normal comebacks.

“What? Is there something wrong?”

He shook his head slightly and began walking slowly towards you, “Y/n, you’re bleeding. We need to get you help.”

“It’s just a broken nose Sam, trust me I’ve survived worse.”

He was right in front of you now, his dark eyes conveying so much worry as he looked you over more closely. “No y/n, we need to get you to a hospital.”

You didn’t get what he was on about until he angled his head at your stomach, where you could now see the bullet wound you must’ve received in the mess of the fight bleeding profusely.

“Oh. Well that’s not ideal.”

You stumbled slightly as you started registering the pain you were in, the adrenaline from the fight beginning to wear off now. Sam was quick to steady you with his arms, and the concern on his face, his concern for you, warmed your heart a little even amidst the pain.

He manoeuvred you to the floor to rest whilst he spoke to Bucky over the comms to update him on the situation, and it might’ve been the blood loss speaking but you couldn’t help but think to yourself that he looked even more attractive than normal. He raised an eyebrow at you when he caught you staring, and quickly shaking the thoughts out of your head you began speaking.

“I’m sorry, I fucked up, I didn’t want to call for back up so you would know I can handle things and then I lost the target and then apparently got injured in the mess. All in all not my best mission, so I’m sorry.”

He shook his head at you, crouching down in front of you, “No y/n, you have absolutely nothing to apologise for. This is 100% on me and I’m so so sorry - I hate to see you get hurt, and that’s exactly what happened here.”

“How’s it on you?”

“It was my informant who gave the wrong information which I believed without confirming it, and then you went in here with no back up. You could’ve died y/n. I- No, we, can’t handle another loss, especially if it was you, you mean too much to Bucky and I now.” He looked down at his hands, avoiding your eyes, “I’ll do better next time.”

You hated how sad and broken he looked as he admitted this to you, and bad injuries or not, you were having none of his wallowing today. “Listen to me here Samuel Wilson - you are not to blame for this, sometimes there is bad intel and that’s just something we have to deal with. And if you will not let me blame myself for anything that’s gone wrong today then I ban you from thinking the same about yourself okay?”

He finally looked up at you to see the sincerity in your eyes and gave a small smile, “Okay.”

“I hate to break up the moment,” you both sat up quickly, ready to fight, to see Bucky approaching the two of you and dragging the target behind him, “but we need to get you to a hospital and this guy to a cell.”

“That might be a good idea as my vision is starting to go a little blurry.”

“Shit, okay, I’m gonna pick you up is that alright?” Sam asked, only needing a nod from you before you were in his arms bridal style and following Bucky out of the building.

As you approached the vehicle you were using, you poked Sam’s cheek to get his attention.

“I don’t want to see you get hurt either by the way, you mean too much to me as well.”

His eyes shined as he looked down at you, but his attention was quickly caught by Bucky muttering under his breath “God, just kiss already, you two make me feel sick.”

You huffed a laugh, ignoring your own blushing cheeks, and instead looked at Sam who had his own red cheeks and was now glaring at Bucky with a look, that if it could, would kill him.

He soon gave up with glaring at his friend, and instead looked down at you with a small, possibly hopeful smile on his face that you readily returned.

#I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO POST THIS FOR OVER A DAY WHY DOES THIS SITE HATE ME??????#also it is very on brand for me for my first work in a fandom to be a fic where someone gets hurt #some say i should go to therapy but i say writing does the job almost as well :)#falcons-wings #sam wilson #sam wilson x reader #the falcon and the winter soldier #bucky barnes #anthony mackie #tfatws #marvel #mcu #bucky barnes x reader #mcu imagine #sam wilson imagine #james buchanan barnes #sambucky #sam wilson fic

167 notes · View notes

pandoraborn · 2 years

Note

havent seen the most recent lore streams, but i could do with some technoblade fluff. just a calm sit by the fire, maybe some hot chocolate, philza minecraft rambling in the background, steve.

Characters: Technoblade, Philza Word counter: 907 words Content: Right after Techno is freed, hints of anxiety and trauma, mild religious talk

--------------------------------------------------

"Would you like something warm to drink, Techno?" Phil's voice is a gentle cadence as he tries to coax the pig-man out of his stupor. Techno's been shell-shocked ever since being broken out of prison, and Phil is trying to push aside the guilt. Techno can joke with him about waiting three months, but Phil can recognize the sadness in the pig's eyes as well. A deep, unspoken emotion that he knows will never be talked about outside of casual jokes.

"No. Well, maybe." Techno turns his head toward Phil, resting his chin in his hand. "I feel like that's the least you can do for me." He snorts before turning back toward the fireplace, gaze unfocusing for just a few seconds.

"I can also bring your polar bear inside," Phil offers. "Steve's trying to break the door down." There's a laugh in his voice, but Phil's downplaying the very real worry that the polar bear would actually destroy their door in order to get to Techno. The bear is big enough.

"I can let him in." Techno pushes himself to his feet. He's unsteady, fingers trembling, but he manages to bring Steve inside without falling over. Lumbering back to the armchair, Techno sits down with a sigh, then wraps his arms around Steve's neck, burying his face in his pet's fur. Steve makes a grumbling noise that Phil would swear is purring, if polar bears could even do that.

Shaking his head, Phil heads for the kitchen to fill the kettle with water. He contemplates tea, but they're running low on herbs, and he doesn't exactly feel like going out to find any; that would be a big trek. What they do have is chocolate. It'd be easy enough to make some hot chocolate for both of them. Actually, Phil has a better idea.

Dumping the water out, he wraps his cloak around him as he heads out, grabbing a bucket along the way. He can easily grab milk from one of the cows for something richer.

Phil does exactly that: patting the cow on the head when he's finished. The milk is warm, and Phil lifts it to carry it back inside the house.

It doesn't take long for Phil to put the milk to fire, stirring in bits of cocoa until the aroma of rich chocolate starts to permeate the air. In the other room, Techno starts to sniff.

"Smells good in there Phil." He still sounds distance, like he's just barely waking up from a heavy sleep. Phil wonders if Techno had noticed he went outside to milk a cow.

"I'll be done momentarily," Phil calls back. He adds some sugar to sweeten the drink a little more, but no more. Neither of them want anything too sweet, and the hot chocolate already smells divine.

Pouring it into mugs, Phil carries the drinks into the parlor and sits in the chair next to Techno's. Techno reaches for a mug, fingers trembling lightly.

Steve shifts, eyeing the drink curiously, lifting a paw as if begging for some of the drink. "No," Techno chides the bear. "This is my drink, we'll get you milk later."

Techno clutches the mug with both hands, as if trying to leech the heat from his drink. Phil doesn't know Techno to ever get cold, but he certainly seems like it now.

"Are you sure you're alright?" Phil asks.

"Did I tell you I met God?"

Phil blinks. Of all the things Techno to hit him with, he never expected religion. Now he's panicked, just what exactly had happened in that prison? He doesn't get to ponder for long, because Techno's continuing as if Phil isn't even there.

"Dream and I accidentally summoned him. Them, it. I don't know. It gave us one wish, so I wished for a bell. Phil, it was pog, he actually gave me a bell."

"You met God, and asked for a bell?" Phil purses his lips. "I never pegged you as the religious type."

"Don't get me wrong, I'm not a believer or anything. At least, I don't really have a reason to be. I still hate the Church of Prime, but come on, how many of them can really say they met God and lived?"

Phil laughs. "I'm assuming you had to leave the bell in the cell, then?"

"Of course, mining it would've been awful, and Quackity was-" Techno cuts himself off there. Techno's mug tips dangerously forward, spilling a couple droplets. Phil can recognize anger, so he doesn't press.

"Drink your cocoa, Techno. Warm yourself up."

Techno obeys silently. Steve rests his head on Techno's lap, letting out a soft rumbling noise that Phil recognizes as something more calming.

"That's right Steve, you're cool. You and Phil both, you're just amazing." Techno smiles down at the bear as he drinks his beverage. "Thanks Phil, this is good."

"Anything for you Tech," Phil responds, feeling a sense of pride. "Take it easy, alright? You deserve a break."

The pig doesn't say anything in response, he continues to sit there, idly petting Steve and staring out the window. It's a quiet evening, and Phil senses unrest brewing in the rest of the server. But this moment, this night? He can be there for his friend and comfort him.

After all, he's sure even Techno needs someone to lift him back up when times get tough, and Phil's glad he can be that someone.

#dream smp #dream smp fanfiction #miishae writes #technoblade #philza #c!techno #c!philza #hints of trauma #hints of anxiety #mild religious talk #technofluff #techno and phil fluff #techno and phil friendship #steve the polarbear

15 notes · View notes

surviving---not---living · 3 years

Text

What the fuck do I do?...

**tw emotional/physical abuse mentions**

posted this on reddit with different ages and such so he wont find it but he doesnt use tumblr so I wanted to post here to see if yall had some suggestions as well any help would be greatly appreciated or to just know someone read would also be enough... with that said I'll paste the post.

to start I'm 23f and the fiance is 38m

I have an idea of what i should do i just sincerely dont want to i dont want to leave him homeless and without money or a job...

but the last few months have me scared and confused...

(during arguments he let's me write down what's happening when I hear something that stands out to me in Hope's itll help me fix my behaviour i got from my parents so ive been able to write down exact wording on some things said) theres just so much going on...

to preface this hes never been physically abusive to me and thankfully it's not there yet. in his defense though i was raised very incorrectly due to shit parents and I have a lot of mental issues that cause self sabotage, delusional thinking- meaning If I personally believe something it usually takes a small war to get my mind to recognize im actually wrong, as well as terrible memory so if I do acknowledge I've done something wrong more often than not my head forgets what happened or what i even did wrong if anything and the next time it inevitably happens again I have no information to pull from to tell me what I did was wrong or why. so basically I'm kind of a fuck up, I'm doing my best to fix my shit but yeah my fiance has been dealing with all of that for 4 years now.

(*some minorly important issues

•he's been interrupting me not letting me finish what I'm saying and just outright changing the topic since we first got together, although wrong of me I started doing that as well because i saw no other way to be able to speak to him except even when I'm doing the exact same shit hes doing it seems like hes the only allowed to be upset.

•we were in an open relationship except he didnt follow the rules we agreed to one time and that broke my trust I had for him. we said no coworkers, we said only people we were both interested in we said no one that's taken and yet all of those got broken over an ugly bitch. and I still get shit for bringing it up to this day.

•he said that until I start prefacing all of my conversations with him he wont count any attempt I've made at talking to him about my problems. so basically everything I've tried talking to him about doesnt fucking matter and it doesnt fucking count. not even when I tried telling him 3 separate times I'm feeling suicidal to top it off everytime i mentioned it, it ended in an argument.

•he told me he got suicidal thoughts for the first time in 10 years due to me and honestly I didnt know how to fucking respond to that. it made me sad yeah but where was the care I needed when I brought up the same thing? where was his give a fuck hes supposed to show if he actually cares about me??

•he says he interrupts me because what I have to say is either false, not grounded in reality, or they're excuses. except he has little to no way of knowing any of that is true unless he hears me all the way out I could be agreeing with him and he still interrupts and gets pissed.

•I believe hes a hypocrite but he says nah hes only doing this because I'm doing bad.

•hes said multiple times that i wont see any improvement in him until he sees I've got my shit together. even though hes the one that caused the first problems in this relationship I'm supposed to be the first one to fix my shit? instead of both of us working on our shit together??? and when I ask those questions he responds with yes you are supposed to be the first one to fix your shit because I'm at the end of my rope and I wont take this anymore.)

but on to why I've been scared. this person told me he used to be abusive with an equally abusive ex for many reasons and after splitting up he vowed to never do that again and never end up like they did.

fast forward to our relationship and well a few months ago he told me he wanted to hit me and made it a point to say he wasnt going to but he really wanted to.

he said that because we were both in my car and he wanted to leave with the car except I wasnt going to get out of MY car so he started yelling, i got scared and left later on he told me that was the first time hes ever wanted to hit me and I should think about what it is I did to get him to that point. after that I left it alone for a month because things got a bit better and then came the next time he said he wanted to hit me. now I dont remember the reason for him saying it the second time but I wasnt going to let that slip as easily as the first so I spoke up about it and what he had to say about me telling him it made me scared of him to know he wanted to hit me was " well if you Weren't a coward, normally when someone says they want to hit you it's a signal that you're doing something so wrong that they want to hit you." and me knowing him i knew this was one of those times he just wasnt going to budge.

so on to the next argument.

he told me I'm the one who thrust those thoughts into him, that I'm the reason they ever came to be, I'm why the exist in the first place. and he doesnt seem to understand when I say that no I'm not the reason your head wants to hurt me they exist there because of your last relationship letting that be an option. he also said he keeps the option of abuse in his head with a line in front of it to remind him to never pass that line and he doesn't understand that keeping that idea in his head at all is not a good thing because now the option is available whether you want to take it or not and

he. just. kept. arguing. and defending.

now on to the last argument.

he says he wants me to stop putting him in a position to do all the thinking and decision making for me, when I've asked him multiple times to stop doing that because I want to do shit for myself and all he keeps saying is show me that you can actually think for yourself and I'll stop needing to do that. like motherfucker at least give me the time to make decisions or thoughts.

I know it's not his fault that I take longer to process things but he knows this fact and keeps expecting me to already have a response half a second later to something I'm barely registering 5 seconds after it happened and again yes I know its something I have to work on and I am but atm it's still an existing issue.

hes trying to call thinking for me and making decisions for me "a gift" (the exact context for him saying this wasnt written down as I was too upset at the audacity of that claim.)

he wants me to show overwhelming efforts to fix my fucked behavioral issues but the efforts I'm putting in atm dont matter to him and that hes hanging on a single thread hes no longer willing to take anything but Absolute compliance(yes he used the actual words absolute compliance) if he doesnt see me losing sleep to figure out and fix my shit he wont be convinced I'm trying. he ended that segment with him saying hes not using these words to control or manipulate me. he says this is a requirement a yes or no and he wont make his decision on whether he wants to break up with me until I say yes or no to his absolute compliance. he said his decision is solely based on my answer and If i say yes i dont get to back off or get out of it.

I also wrote down a quote he said that was just so arrogant i couldnt leave it out.

"You sit before an artisan of problem solving." -my fiance

soo haha yeahh the last argument happened right before going to bed and I started typing this as soon as I got up and finished my hygiene stuff.

I'm pretty sure if he had never told me he'd wanted to hit me this wouldn't be such a difficult thing to answer... I love him and I have no idea if I should pick him and risk any form of my safety or just let him leave me.. he has no job, no money, and no family to go to.. I know he doesnt care about being homeless but I do care..I fucking love him and I dont want that for him not even for a day... as shitty as he and I can both be I still dont believe that's what he deserves... if he ever finds this hell be even more pissed that I'm even concerned about what he'll do if he leaves.. he always told me to not care and that if I ever do want to leave him to not worry about that and just get it over with sooner.. thing is I dont want to leave I just want my baby back... the one that didnt yell or didnt want to hit me at all... I want our old relationship back.. I guess I want to know if that's even possible at this point. any words from anyone would be really nice right now.. if only to just feel like someone's talking to me.. my fiance is literally the only person I talk to and the closest thing to a friend I have. and i dont tell my parents any of what's happening because they're stressed enough so I've been basically alone for 4 years with no one but my fiance to talk to..

granted it's my fault I havent made other friends but I've been so stressed recently that I havent done much about it for many reasons..

update: he just finished telling me that hes only had half a burger in the last 3 days, (due to stress) he just wanted to let me know that apparently.

#abusive relationship #tw abuse #mine #relationship #please help me #help #relationship advice #fiancé #couple problems #manipulative #maybe #physical abuse #lost #scared #lonely #what do i do

7 notes · View notes

magniloquent-raven · 3 years

Text

Fic Writer Questions

i was tagged by @cherry-toxic and @gideongrace ty both 💕🥰💕

How many works do you have on AO3?

which is a relatively small number but sometimes im still like, holy shit i finished 15 whole fics lmao

What's your total AO3 word count?

68,299 (time to post a 701 word fic and then never post again i guess)

How many fandoms have you written for and what are they?

well this is about to get mildly embarrassing lmfao. ive only got harry potter & stranger things fics on my ao3 and tumblr but if you want a full list, as a teenager i posted a shitty borderlands self-insert fic on quizilla, and hiccup/jack frost fic on ff.net.

and if u count fics that never got finished or published anywhere i dabbled in teen wolf, supernatural, dragon age, star wars, left 4 dead 2, skyrim, good omens, the mcu, buffy, wynonna earp, plus like, general disney/dreamworks crossover fic. and i started writing shameless fics recently, we'll see if i actually finish any. aaaand...i think that's it?

so...15?

What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1. Wait for you, Burn for You

2. Find Our Way

3. Something to Hold

4. Room for One More Troubled Soul

5. Don't Know What I'm Gonna Do (About This Feeling Inside)

all harringrove fics except #4, which is probably only on the list because it's been on ao3 the longest lol

Do you respond to comments, why or why not?

oh god, i used to. i did when i was starting out, but then i just. i get self-conscious about what to actually say & leave shit to sit for too long. and suddenly ive got like 100 comments i havent replied to and i want to respond to them so bad but ive left them so long i feel weird about it now and it's a problem 😥

i want to start responding to them again, and every time i get a new one i tell myself im gonna but i never do cuz im fuckin awkward lmao

What's the fic you've written with the angstiest ending?

i......don't really do angsty endings. like, most of my fics end with smooches and/or love confessions lmao, i don't like leaving things off sad, even if it starts depressing as hell.

maybe this one? it still ends soft but without resolving the thing billy was angsting about, so.

Do you write crossovers? If so what's the craziest one you've ever written?

hahahhha.............i don't really do them anymore, but i already said i was into the whole animation movie crossover thing, so. yeah, i did lol. it was when i was in high school so of course i did one that was like, every disney character ever and they're going to school together. which really isn't that crazy a concept, but it was a lot of movies to write in so maybe that counts

Have you ever received hate on a fic?

nahh, not rly. i don't get around enough to attract anti attention lol, tho i did get one of those "👎" comments when someone was going around doing that, which lbr, is so low effort it barely counts 😂

Do you write smut? If so what kind?

yea sometimes. i do get the occasional horny idea lmao. mostly "what if touch-starved character + tenderness" or someone having lots of feelings while they're fucking. someone is usually billy lbr. i've also got a couple "what if someone got tied up and treated right" ideas but i don't think i've actually published any of those lmao

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

don't think so?

Have you ever had a fic translated?

i have not

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

yea, kinda! a collab with a friend of mine for fun

What's your all time favourite ship?

i...don't know? i get emotionally invested in characters more than the relationships themselves lol. i don't even know what ship i've been invested in for a long time, most of the shit i shipped as a kid i don't give a fuck about anymore lol.

except fuffy, actually. i've always shipped buffy/faith

and if we wanna go with fandom i've actively stuck with the longest it'd be harringrove. cuz ive been here and writing shit for yall for over a year now when i usually would've cycled thru a couple fixations by now lol

What's a WIP that you want to finish but don't think you ever will?

that's a mean question lmao how dare you. i honestly don't know, i have a lot of wips and i want to finish all of them. i know i won't but there isn't one specifically that seems less likely than the others so idk

What are your writing strengths?

uhhhhh.....i mean i've been told that my characterization is good? like, ppl being able to picture the actual characters when they're reading n stuff, so that's nice. and i could write introspection forever, u don't even know man, i get in the zone. i love getting in a character's head and picking apart their emotional state

What are your writing weaknesses?

writing dialogue really trips me up because i get picky about word choice lmao. i can be writing uninterrupted for twenty minutes cuz it's all a character's inner monologue but the second they gotta speak out loud im sittin there like ok what words sound natural and how much would they be willing to say etc. etc. suddenly it's an hour later and i've written three lines of dialogue. plus i tend to edit as i go so i'm always stopping and going back and rewriting stuff instead of just finishing the damn story

What are your thoughts on writing dialogue in other languages in a fic?

no thoughts head empty

lmao for real tho idk? i mean there's that one trope, when someone says nice stuff in a language the other person doesn't speak because they're pining and not sure if they're allowed to say it outright, that shit's cute. im sure all the google translated dialogue has been annoyin as shit for native speakers lmfao but yeah

What was the first fandom you ever wrote for?

probably harry potter but i literally have no idea. i started writing fic in my early teens and that time of my life is a big fuckin blur lmao

What's your favourite fic you've written?

ngl i think my fav fic is one of the multi-chapter wips i haven't published lmao

BUT. if i gotta pick something yall have read, this one. just a lil guy. plant dad billy and domesticity. it's cute and i like it. maybe also this fic that i wrote for valentine's day. i wrote basically the whole thing in one day and i was really proud of myself lmao, and i just really like headcanoning backstory for billy & that fic is rly just about him growing up, so

tagging @rvspberryjvm @wingedbears @paperbodiesamongthestars @platypan

if yall wanna! 💕

8 notes · View notes

westerberg · 3 years

Text

tagged by @officialglenntilbrook 😘💞💖❤️🥂

1. what is the first song you remember hearing? Oh man uhh... i remember my my dad playing the video for... oops i did it again I think? by britney spears and i was very obsessed with it. if i saw the video I would know but i don’t feel like doing that. hard to say if that is my earliest memory of music tho. i remember listening to the R.E.M. In Time greatest hits in the car late at night and feeling weird out of body as Man on the Moon came on. i like that story better but I have no idea when that memory is from. i also feel like i heard my mom singing along with Sarah McLaughlin or Norah Jones a lot when i was very young.

2. what is the first band you got into? hmm... i really loved Bon Jovi when I was very young but i didn’t like. have any knowledge of them or their discography I just liked slippery when wet and their greatest hits. and also thats embarrassing so i am trying to think of an out... probably the first real musical obsession i had was lana del rey when I was 14 /15 but thats also not great. just take the L buddy... i didnt actually get into music i would now consider very good until about 16.

3. do you collect any physical music? during quar i started trolling ebay and other similar sites for cheap cds and I have gotten a pretty good collection! you would be shocked the number of people who just really do not want to have their R.E.M. albums anymore. I have a few vinyls- a couple of cheap Joni records, Station to Station, the mats Dead Mans Pop boxset thing, and the R.E.M. single So. Central Rain. Oh and I have a very cool cd single of beastie boys body movin’. I also have a collection of cassettes that used to belong to my mom- she passed 5 yrs ago so they are very special to me! she had some R.E.M., U2, Eurythmics, Squeeze, Crowded House, Indigo Girls, and I recently dug up a bootlegged Tracy Chapman tape! she might have some more at her childhood home and if I find a tape of murmur i’ll like blackout. the sad thing is that now I really like all these musicians my mom apparently liked but i was not into them when she was alive so :/ figuring things out feels like archeology. was listening to In Time greatest hits the other day and was like she definitely skipped E-Bow the Letter every time it came on lol bc i did not hear this song until like last year.

4. what is your favourite piece of music memorabilia? do you know that picture of R.E.M. where they are all holding roses like they are all going to the prom together? i scored a poster of that off Ebay for the incredible deal of $50!! a deal at any price :) I don’t have much that is like legit valuable lol. But here you have to see the picture

5. what's your favourite concert you've ever been to? hmm i havent really been to any truly mindblowing concerts I don’t think. I got to see Tommy Stinson play an acoustic set at 7th street entry in 2019 which was very cool. I feel crazy saying thats my favorite but it was incredibly special.

6. if you could see one artist who is no longer alive in concert, who would it be? If you ask right now I would probably have to say Replacements with Bob Stinson. Prince would be a close one

7. have you met any musicians? almost! when i went to see tommy stinson, afterwards he was hanging in a bar next to the club and was taking selfies with people. i kept thinking about getting in line and eventually i decided to just do it. when i finally went to go look for him he was deep in a conversation with someone and I also realized i had nothing intelligent to say, so i sat and stared at him talking for a bit until i left and went back to the show.

8. what is your go to album when you're feeling sad? Tim by the mats! i think i maybe listened to this album every day my senior year of high school. it is legitimately strange how I feel as if this album just knows me very well. everyone says this about the mats but every song feels like it’s about me and my life. I think a perk of being a lower middle class Minnesotan with an alcoholic father is just really really getting the replacements. but i guess it depends on the kind of sad I am. If i’m just looking to be cheered up i might go with Lifes Rich Pageant or Green by R.E.M. because invariably by the end of Tim I will be bummed out !

9. what is your go to album when you're feeling happy? somehow this is a very hard question. Radio City by Big Star was a big one for me when i was still on campus. maybe an obvious one but rubber soul is a good being happy album

10. what is one music documentary you love? the doc Every Everything about Grant Hart from Hüsker Dü is a favorite. it’s just all interview with him and he’s a fascinating guy. I’ve never watched an interview with him where i wasn’t like woah u’re smart :0... the director of that also did a good replacements doc but at certain point with mats journalism im just like well i could’ve just read trouble boys.

11. what is one concert DVD you love? I think I only own one concert DVD, Prince’s Lovesexy show which i was very obsessed with back in high school.

12. do you prefer listening to playlists or albums? i prefer albums usually, sometimes i’m in the mood for a playlist but albums are def superior

13. do you prefer to listen to albums in order or on shuffle? in order !!!! What am i a psychopath

14. what is your favourite deep cut song by your favourite artist? Portland by the mats is a top ten song of theirs. very in character for it to be a b-side i’m not even mad

15. what is your favourite cd/cassette/vinyl you own in terms of packaging? I love the inner sleeve of my Grandpaboy cd which is just Paul Westerberg’s doodles and scribblings. sometimes when i buy stuff off of ebay it comes with notes and stuff too which is my favorite. my copy of suicaine gratifaction came with a very sweet note of how much the previous owner loved it. and my copy of mbv’s loveless has this very hard to read note which i can maybe make out half of. if you can read it please translate for me.

i love being tagged but if you do not want to answer 15 long questions do not feel pressured! i shall tag @the-replacemints @pattismithgender @myfcukingrat @willemdafoeplscallmemynumberis @little-rimbaud @milesofsmiles97 @electrofolk 🤙😜💘

#this was very fun!!!! thank yoo <3

6 notes · View notes

escapewriter · 3 years

Text

Hey There Delilah

pairing : seungkwan x reader

synopsis : if only you got his address right, maybe he wouldn’t have been that salty.

genre : fluff, humor, slight angst

word count : 3.3k

warnings : none

posted : 01/16/21

a/n : IM SO SORRY THAT I HAVENT UPDATED THIS FOR A MONTH. BUT I GOT INSPO BECAUSE HIS BIRTHDAY WAS COMING UP SO HAPPY SEUNGKWAN DAY!!!!

TAGLIST : @vibecheckvernon @beomiebear5 @lightoflife @skylions-den @noniesgirl

won’t let me tag : @pandora1834

send me an ask/dm if you would like to be on the taglist

pieces of love masterlist // playlist // main masterlist

“Do you have to leave so soon?” Seunkwan pouted as he held your hand and rolled your luggage in the other. “I mean, you have time to stay a little longer.” He looked down at your intertwined fingers, slightly swinging it.

“You’re telling me this now? If you told me earlier, I could have gone later but I already got my ticket and we’re literally standing in the middle of the airport.” His mouth fell open as you giggled, releasing his hand to cup his face in your palms. “Don’t worry, Kwan, I’ll be back before you know it. And remember our deal, okay? Only letters.”

He sighed but repeated your words in a defeated tone, “Only letters.”

“Man, fuck these letters.” Seungkwan groaned in annoyance as he crumpled the 5th piece of paper into a ball and threw it into the trash bin. Jun looked up from his phone where he was seated on the couch, a concerned, yet amused, look in his eyes.

“What’s wrong? Can’t spell their name right?” Laughing at his own joke, he didn’t notice his friend swiftly turn in his chair to glare at him, shutting him up with a cough. He cleared his throat and nervously sat up straight, “Seriously, what’s wrong? Don’t know how to spell something or what?”

“No that's not the problem, and even if it was, I wouldn’t be asking you how to spell something.” Seungkwan turned back to his desk, resting his head on the wooden table. “I haven’t gotten a letter in a month. Do you think something’s wrong?” Jun hummed again, listening as he scrolled mindlessly on his phone.

“I don’t think you did anything wrong, they’re probably just busy. I mean, New York is a busy place and they gotta pay attention to some things, I guess.” Seungkwan turned around again, looking at the coffee table Jun had his feet propped up on.

“I don’t think I did anything wrong. I’m saying, maybe something is wrong.”

Jun looked up, eyes staring at Seungkwan’s furrowed eyebrows, “Wouldn’t their family tell you though? I honestly don’t think it’s that big of a deal. Just write the letter and ask them what’s wrong and if they don’t reply, then... there's your answer.”

“Aren’t you such great help.”

Seungkwan slammed the pen on the desk, finally finished writing the letter to you. He doesn’t really know why you stopped sending letters; it was usually a one to two week delay. Nevermind that, Seungkwan is sure that after you get this letter, you will definitely reply to him.

“Jun, can you read this for me? See if it sounds good?” He turned to the male who was eating on the small table, holding out the letter for him to take. Reaching over, Jun retrieved the letter from Seungkwan’s grasp, scanning the neat handwriting before reading:

Hey there,

How are you? Are the people treating you nice there?I sure hope they are because you’re too kind for this world. What’s it like living there so far? I’m sorry for all these questions, I’m just curious because ya know, it's New York City!

So… it’s been a while since I’ve gotten a letter from you, but maybe you’ve been busy. I mean, this internship, it’s a big deal so I wouldn’t want you to worry about sending letters all the time. Plus it probably keeps you occupied so don’t worry about anything, I’m just glad you’re happy doing what you love.

Anyway, uh, I heard back from Vernon. He said that he can show you around since he’s in town visiting with his mom. I don’t know if you’ll get this in time, but maybe he’ll contact you about it!

I really miss you. I know it was such terrible timing for me to have confessed. Just two weeks before you had to leave. Ah I wish I could’ve done it sooner. Anyway, I hope you’re doing well. Don’t overwork yourself and stay safe, okay?

Remember, time square could never shine as bright as you. I know it’s cheesy but I’ll always say it because that was my best pick up line ever. Okay, now get back to work! I’ll see you soon! I’m counting down the days!

From, Seungkwan

Jun put down his arm that was holding the letter and looked at Seungkwan who was munching away the food on his plate, “‘Time square could never shine as bright as you?’ MAN, and I thought Mingyu was the cheesy one in our group.”

Glaring at the elder, he snatched the letter from his hand, muttering something under his breath. “It’s from a song. An inside joke you wouldn’t understand.”

Jun took a sip of his soda, sighing as he set the can on a coaster, “Well, whatever it is, cross your fingers in hopes that they mail you back,” He stood up, wiping his hands on his jeans, “I’ll take my leave, gotta go cleanse my apartment.”

Seungkwan nodded, looking at the letter in his hands. Of all the things, it had to be letters.

“Seungkwan, get up.” He mumbled in his sleep, trying to shoo away the intruder that was waking him up. “Seungkwan, have you gotten mail from them yet?” He groaned again, not aware of his surroundings as he rolled over, arm hitting a hard surface beside him. “Man, you really are a pain. Anyway, I have a letter for you.” Seungkwan shot up, squinting at Jun who towered over him in his bed.

“You have a what for me? I’ve been waiting for almost three weeks for one, did one finally come in?” Jun’s eyes widened, not realizing sooner that he didn’t receive a letter from you.

“Oh, uh, you see, um, I was just… kidding.” Seungkwan narrowed his eyes before making a frown and crashing back head first into his pillows. “Seungkwan, come on man. The letter probably got lost in the mail or something. You never know.”

Sitting up, he stared at what’s ahead of him; a bookshelf. The shelf had various books, photo albums, picture frames, etc. Mainly, it had a picture of the two of you hanging out the day he finally confessed — just two weeks before you had to leave. He doesn’t remember that night, though he wished he did after staring at the photo for so long now.

“Seungkwan! What are you looking at?” Jun leaned over, trying to take a glance at what his friend was eyeing, though it appears it is something that won’t make him feel any better. “Okay, enough is enough. You helped me during my break up, so I’m gonna help you through this letter drought, okay? Okay. Now, up you go!” Jun lifted the man from his bed, dragging him to the middle of his bedroom before plopping him down on the rug. “You're not gonna help me out Seungkwan? Come on, please.”

“What if they met someone,” Jun thought for a moment, hoping what Seungkwan said didn’t turn out to be true. He had to stay positive and make sure his friend does too.

“Hey, don’t think like that, okay? Now get up and wash up, we’re going to get food.” Seungkwan sighed, finally deciding to listen to his friend.

“Jun, I know you meant to go out to get food, but I didn’t think that I would pay for it AND we eat it at my place.”

“It’s the thought that counts, and thank you for paying. The food? Muah.”

Seungkwan rolled his eyes and put a piece of meat into his mouth, staring at the desk that was against the wall. He eyed the papers, pens, and pencils; a wave of sadness crashing over him. He couldn’t help but think that you actually had moved on. All the doubts he had in the beginning when you left resurfaced as he thought that maybe you just used him for those last two weeks you had spent with him. But why would you do something like that? It didn’t make any sense, but maybe Seungkwan doesn’t really know you.

“Hey, Seungkwan what’s the date today?”

“Not sure, why?”

Jun hummed, noticing that Seungkwan hasn’t been keeping track of the days recently, so he decided to keep this valuable information to himself, “No reason, just wasn’t sure.”

Seungkwan sat at his desk, thinking about how he should start the next letter to write. He used to write every week to you, but now he hasn’t written to you for over a month. He swirled the pen in his hand, attempting to gather words to form a sentence in his head. Finally, that imaginary lightbulb lit up, his eyes sparkling with ideas.

Hey there,

How’s New York City treating you? Have you taken care of yourself? Eating all your supplements?

Scratching his head, he scribbled on the paper and decided to use this as a rough draft and to rewrite it later.

How’s New York City treating you? Have you taken care of yourself? Eating all your supplements?

I don’t know what’s going on, but I hope you’re safe over there. It’s getting more and more difficult for me to go so long without seeing you and hearing your voice. I miss you.

He thought maybe it was too cheesy, or maybe he was so in love he couldn’t control it. Nope it was too cheesy.

I don’t know what’s going on, but I hope you’re safe over there. It’s getting more and more difficult for me to go so long without seeing you and hearing your voice. I miss you.

Taking a small sip of his coffee, Seungkwan closed his eyes, thinking about the situation he was in. He used to be so good at saying all the right words in his letters but now he couldn’t even find anything to say. He doesn’t even know if you're reading them or not. That hurt his pride a bit because of how much time and dedication he spent to write and think these out to send to you, only to not get a letter in almost two months. That’s the crazy thing about love; one would do anything for the person they love.

Snapping his eyes open, he checked the time only to find that it was no use because the clock was broken. The ticking of it irritated him and it always felt like it was getting slower and slower.

Focusing on the paper in front of him, he decided that if you weren’t going to send any letter, then he wasn’t going to either. It sounded like a great idea, but it was also bad at the same time. He didn’t know why, but he chose to ignore the bad part.

Jun could sense that Seungkwan was feeling a bit better than usual, but that's what freaked him out the most. Seungkwan hasn’t been this active ever since he got his first letter from you, so he guesses that his friend received a letter. Jun wanted to ask, but the fear of the thought not being true made him hesitate and not ask at all. He didn’t want to see his friend in despair again. After all, you are coming home in a few hours.

Seungkwan hasn’t felt like he has right now since a few months ago. It could be the weather, the feeling of the air, the food, anything. He just knows that today is a good day.

“Jun, what are we gonna do today? I’m feeling great so we should go out.” Jun pursed his lips as Seungkwan looked at his friend, waiting for an answer. Jun looked up in thought, but his mind just wandered back to his bed or the couch because he was feeling a lazy day.

“I don’t know, I’m not really in the mood to… go out.”

“Why? Are you feeling okay?” Seungkwan raised his hand to touch Jun’s forehead, only for Jun to smack it away.

“I feel fine, I’m just a bit lazy is all.” Jun thought to himself, thinking about how you’d for sure want to see Seungkwan and to talk to him about everything. Well, that's what he thinks and hopes. “Can we stay here for a bit and then head out?”

Plopping down next to him, Seungkwan turned on the TV, clicking through the channels before keeping it on one show. “Let me know when you want to leave.”

Seungkwan soon fell asleep on the couch, laying on his right side. Jun looked at him and then to the clock. He set a reminder on his phone before you left on when you would come back and what time.

It was currently 3:10pm and on his phone, it says you arrived at 1 o’clock in the afternoon. The airport is quite away and you probably are feeling tired after the plane ride, but Jun can’t help to look back every time he hears a car go by, hoping that it’s you to see Seungkwan.

He sighed, glancing at his sleeping friend before getting up and placing a blanket over him. He’s had it rough for the past couple of months, the thoughts of his brain eating him alive. Oh how he knew the feeling all too well.

Hearing a car door shut, Jun peeked outside, seeing you approach the house. Quickly and quietly, he opened the front door and closed it, meeting you halfway.

When you saw him, you immediately smiled, “Jun!” He raised his hand up to his lips, shushing you.

He began to whisper, “Where the hell have you been?” You eyed him weirdly, but shrugging as it was only Jun in front of you. “Do you know how much pain Seungkwan was in? He’s been waiting so long for you to reply.”

You were confused, “What do you mean? I was the one waiting for him to reply back to me. I came here to see what was wrong.” Jun sighed before signaling you to Seungkwan’s home.

“You go in. He’s asleep on the couch and will probably wake up hungry.” He gave you a soft pat on the head, “Glad to have you back, now I’m gonna go. Also, he’ll probably get mad, so don’t mention me.” You giggled before giving him a small hug.

“Thanks Jun.”

Seungkwan groaned, sitting up as he looked around the room, trying to spot Jun. Finding him nowhere, he sighed thinking about how he never went out. Turning to put his feet down, he lifted his arms to stretch, a yawn escaping past his lips. Mid yawn, he sees you at the doorway from the kitchen with a tray. He blinked a few times, not sure if you were really there or if it was just Jun. He rubbed his eyes as you came closer and set the tray onto the coffee table.

“About time you woke up, I’ve been here for an hour.” Seungkwan said nothing, his mind still thinking that this was all just a hallucination. He glazed over at the clock on the desk and saw that it was almost 4:30pm.

He heard you clear your throat, his mind now processing that you were indeed actually there with him in the same room. You began to walk around the small table, “I made your favorite soup,” Sitting down next to him, you looked into his wide eyes, “Why are you so surprised? I should be the surprised one here.”

Blinking a few times, he finally said your name. Lifting up his hand, he caressed your cheek lovingly as you smiled bitterly. But then he remembered how you never responded to him, and how you had the audacity to come into his home as if nothing was wrong.

He narrowed his eyes, taking his hand away from your face before standing up abruptly, “Why didn’t you mail me back?” Your eyebrows shot up and so did your legs, but wanting to one up him, you stood on the couch.

“I could ask you the same thing, Seungkwan! I haven’t received a single letter from you.” A shocked look flashed over his features as he looked up at you.

“What do you mean ‘haven’t received’ a single letter? I sent a few asking you why you didn’t respond. But what did I get? N. O. T. H. I. N. G.” You glared at him, not believing the words you were hearing. You sent so many letters with no information as to why he didn’t respond back to you.

“Really Seungkwan? You want to play victim?”

“Victim? I am the victim!” You scoffed, getting off the couch and walked around the table to put some distance between the two of you. “I can’t believe what I’m hearing. You’re accusing me of not responding when I did.” You rubbed your temples, pacing in front of him as you took small glances at his messy desk filled with crumpled papers. You walked over, picking up a ball and unfolded it, reading what he wrote before tossing it aside.

“I told you I wrote. And I did stop, I admit, but that was only because you never responded. I did write to you.” You looked at him, trying to think about what went wrong before an idea popped in your head.

“Seungkwan, what was the last letter you got from me?” He looked around his desk, scanning the messy area before pointing to the only neat pile. You picked up the letters, reading each date and word on the envelopes. However, you immediately knew what the mistake was.

You sighed and closed your eyes, biting your lower lip in frustration. Turning to Seungkwan who was sitting on the couch and eating the food you prepared, you debated if you wanted to hurt your pride by telling him what you did wrong.

He looked at where you were standing with the letters in your hands, as clear sadness in his eyes. You thought about the pain you may have caused him because of one stupid mistake. If only you got the address right.

“Okay Seungkwan, I know what happened, but hear me out.” His eyes narrowed, but he motioned you to continue, “So, when we write letters to each other, we put our address on it, right?” Nodding his head, he took a sip of the warm soup, “Well, the people I was working with moved me to a different department which relocated me to a different city which was far from my apartment.”

You watched his eyes, seeing the expression that tells you he knew nothing about it, “Yeah, you knew nothing because in the letter that I wrote to you, I put the wrong address. I put a 5 instead of a 6.” You looked down, too ashamed to face him and his hard eyes. Seungkwan was surprised, he didn’t know how to process the information, so all he did was laugh.

“I can’t believe how stupid you are.” You let out a soft laugh, hiding your face in the letters. “But I have a question still,” He tried to look at your face, but couldn’t see anything except your nodding, “If we wrote our address, why didn’t you just look at my old letters?”

Placing the letters on the table, you let out a loud groan, softly stomping over to the couch and sitting right next to him. Leaning against his shoulder, you sighed, “Like you said, I can’t believe how stupid I am.”

Seungkwan laughed, moving his arm to wrap around your shoulder, pulling you closer to him. You wrapped your arms around his torso, catching his familiar scent that you missed so much.

“Seungkwan?” He hummed, loving the feeling of having you in his arms again, “I’m sorry I got your address wrong.” He smiled, rubbing your back as a soothing gesture.

“I know. But just remember I’m never letting you live this down.”

#caratwritersclub #newskynet #seventeen #seventeen scenarios #seventeen reactions #seventeen oneshot #seungkwan #boo seungkwan #happy seungkwan day #pieces of love #escapewriter oneshot

40 notes · View notes

fu-yao · 3 years

Note

17, 34 & 37 for gifmaker questions :D

hi ani :D

17. 10 sets, 8 sets, 6 sets? how many gifs to you prefer in a set

oh good question, i more typically prefer 4 sets bc it’s less work 😆 if you take a scroll through my gifs (ignoring all the 2020 series gifsets) you’ll notice that i usually work with 4 sets, which are usually tall or wide gifs!

34. a set that took you a long time/was really hard but you’re really proud of how it came out

omg this question, there’s a few that come to mind, there’s the lwj bday set i made, the wangxian cql x manhua set, my mdzsnet gtkom set, and surprisingly also my cql sects x scenery set (coloring was a bitch i redid each gif at least four times)

37. what sets if any do you have planned to make in the future

i recently had a bit of a slump in gifmaking (esp on my kpop sideblog, i havent posted anything in a while oopsie) but suddenly it’s like i opened a well of ideas in my head bc i have at least 2 gifsets planned for here, which is another wangxian cql x manhua set but in red, and the gifset i’m currently working on which is going to be sad as hell (i think you might have seen that i’m gonna do a spriffing for one of the gifs on the discord!) and as for my kpop sideblog, the group i ult is having their third year anniversary in exactly 20 days and i just got around to making the first 4 gifs of an 8 set to celebrate their anniversary ^-^

ask me questions for gifmakers

#my stars ✨#replies #linglynz

8 notes · View notes

emybain · 4 years

Text

Settling In

this is the first time ive ever written a sequel to an ask fic so i hope yall are happy. this is a sequel to I’m Nova. Nova Artino if you havent read that.

ao3

Simon watched the children play in the backyard from the kitchen window. At the stove, Hugh was making dinner. The kids were taking turns pushing one another on the swing set, Adrian letting Nova have longer turns before she insisted on switching. The sentiment brought a smile to Simon’s face.

It had been a couple weeks since Simon found the girl, only eight years old, in the hands of the Anarchists. After spending a few days in the hospital wing at headquarters, Simon and his husband decided it was best to take her home with them. That way, she would be safe from the hungry eyes of the media. It was frustrating getting her to bed every night, as she refused to set a foot in the guest room until she was alone, but Hugh and Simon were afraid of her running away and wanted to keep an eye on her. At least Adrian loved the idea, having already grown fond of the girl in the short time they had known one another. Their friendship was ironic, in a sad way, but Simon didn’t like to think about it. Georgia had died two years ago, yet her death was still a knife to the side.

“What are we going to do about her?” Simon turned from the window to Hugh, who was pushing around sausage in a pan.

“Hm?” Hugh shifted his body so he faced Simon a bit more.

“What are we going to do about Nova?” He pushed his glasses up and crossed his arms.

The look Simon got was almost comical. “Aren’t we going to keep her? She has nowhere else to go.”

Simon released a soft sigh. “You know we can’t do that, Hugh. Taking on Adrian was one thing. We’re his godparents and we’re financially stable to handle one prodigy child. But two?” He shook his head.

Hugh turned the stove off. “She’s a prodigy? How did you find that out?”

There was a screech from outside, and they both peered out to see Nova stand up from the bottom of the slide, covered in mud and a grin on her face. Adrian stood at the top, laughing.

“Why else would the Anarchists be hiding her?” Simon lowered his voice, although they were the only two in the house. “Ace killed her family because David came to us. Why didn’t he kill her, too?”

Hugh removed his apron and began getting out bowls and silverware. “You’re right. I hadn’t thought about that. But, Love,” he paused, closing the cabinets, “where is she going to go? I mean, don’t you feel as responsible for her as with Adrian?”

A pang hit Simon’s chest. Hugh had a point; they had failed to protect the Artinos the same night Georgia died. It was only right for them to make sure she stayed safe. They owed that much to David and his wife.

“I know.” Simon looked down at the checkered tile. “But will she trust us? Wouldn’t she be better off with a non-Renegade family? You’ve seen the looks she gives us. How she refuses to sleep at night if we’re in the room with her. There’s no telling what kind of bullshit the Anarchists have been feeding her. What’s to say she won’t run away or try to murder us in our sleep in the future?”

Hugh narrowed his eyes at him. “Your paranoia is showing again.” He walked forward and kissed Simon lightly. Simon closed his eyes, welcoming his husband’s hold. “We’ll figure it out,” Hugh said once he pulled away. “In the meantime,” he turned toward the cracked open window, “Kids, dinner!”

“I was afraid you were going to say that,” Simon murmured under his breath as the children entered the kitchen, sweaty and caked in mud from head to toe.

___________

Nova waited for Adrian in his bedroom, spending her time looking at his collection of comic books on his bookshelves. She missed her home a lot, but at least Adrian was nice. He understood what it was like to be uprooted, at least that’s what Nova could figure out based on their conversations. Still, what would Uncle Ace think about her being with the enemy? They let her family die instead of coming to save them. Surely, Ace was coming up with a rescue plan. At eight years old, there wasn’t much she could do to fight back anyway . Leroy refused for Ingrid to start training her until she was at least ten, so she had useless skills. There was her power, but she was still working on making it stronger. And down in the subway tunnels, it wasn’t like she could practice on the other Anarchists. Before she was kidnapped, Nova had plans to be just like her uncle, to be a powerful prodigy that defends all prodigies from discrimination and annihilates any offenders of equality.

Her hands fell upon a comic different from the others. This one was just on plain printer paper and appeared to be homemade. She flipped through it, admiring the designs. They were a bit amateur, but good nonetheless. It was incomplete, clear from the half drawn characters on one of the pages.

The door creaked and she whipped around, only to be met with a slightly startled Adrian. He had fresh pajamas on and held a towel in his hands.

“Did you make this?” Nova held the comic up, unfazed. “It’s really good. I didn’t know you were an artist.”

Adrian pushed the towel into a basket and came forward, gently snatching the comic out of her hands. Nova noticed how his cheeks lit up. “It’s just something I’ve been working on,” he explained, shrugging and putting it back on the shelf. “Just a story.”

“Can I read it?”

“No!” Adrian’s eyes widened. “I mean, it’s not done yet, is all. I wouldn’t want you seeing something unfinished.”

She shot him a weird look and opened her mouth to respond, but Hugh poked his head in.

“Bed time, kids.” He stepped in all the way and started ushering Adrian to his bed. Nova watched as the man sat on the edge of his son’s bed and waited for him to get situated before tucking him in. She averted her eyes when Hugh bent over to plant a kiss on Adrian’s head, while Adrian protested and swatted him away. She quitted the room quietly and made her way down the hall to where they made her sleep, even though she never slept anymore. Not since she was six. Images of Mom and Papà flitted through her head, and she longed to be back in their arms in the safety of their apartment. It hadn’t been much, but it was home. Sometimes, especially recently, Nova thought about running away to the apartment and holing herself inside, but she knew the place would bring back too many bad memories.

The bedroom was dark and cold when she entered. The upstairs of the house gave her the creeps. Adrian was convinced it was haunted, and said so the first night she came home with them. She had laughed at him then, but night after night of wandering around the room and hallways led to her slowly believing him. It wouldn’t surprise her; Ace was responsible for the murders of the mayor and his family. Any ghosts surely didn’t want Nova there. Well, it wouldn’t be the first time she wasn’t wanted.

There was a soft knock on the door, and it opened a bit after Nova refused to respond, She didn’t even acknowledge Hugh as she started pulling back the covers, already in the set of pajamas they gave her.

Nova enjoyed Adrian’s company. She had never had friends her age, or friends at all really, if she didn’t count her family. The Anarchists...weren’t exactly friends either. She knew that they only watched her because Ace ordered them to. Adrian was like her, though. He was nine, but she had a birthday coming up in less than eight months so they were practically the same age. She knew she should hate him for his parents and affiliations, but it wasn’t his fault. That was all he knew. She could tell he was a good person, not like his Renegade parents. Being around them was different than being with Adrian.

“How are you liking the Everhart-Westwood residence, Nova?” His voice was cheerful. Nova didn’t care.

She shrugged, playing with the covers.

Hugh sighed. “Listen, Nova, there are things that you should know about your family, okay?” She glanced at him. He sat on the edge of the bed like he did with Adrian and reached over to pat her shin. “But...I’m afraid you’re going to have to be a little older to fully understand. Just know that...that your father would want you here instead of in the subway tunnels, okay? He was a good man and a good friend, unlike his brother who was narcissistic and hotheaded.” Nova deflated, and had to bite back arguing over what he believed was best for her. He was just saying these things to get her to open up and to turn against the Anarchists and her uncle. He didn’t care about her. If he did, her family would still be alive.

But still…”You knew Papà?”

Hugh smiled, though it was sad. “Yes. And there hasn’t been a day that has passed that I haven’t felt guilt for failing him. For failing you. But that’s a story for another day.” He paused and stood then, shaking his head. “Do you want to be tucked in? Adrian won’t admit it, but I’ve gotten pretty good at it since we adopted him.”

Nova shook her head, wanting to ask more questions but knowing they would lead to nowhere.

Hugh left and closed the door behind him softly, leaving her to a dark room and racing thoughts.

#renegades #archenemies #supernova #au #nova artino #adrian everhart #danna bell #narcissa cronin #ruby tucker #oscar silva #hugh everhart #simon westwood #max everhart #anarchists #my writing

117 notes · View notes

deeeelightfuldee · 3 years

Text

Are you better at cooking dinners or making cakes/biscuits/sweets? baking definitely. I want to get more comfortable cooking.

Have you ever cut someone else’s hair? yes. I used to be pretty good at doing my brothers hair-- even the fading. But I’m sure I’ve forgotten it all by now.

Who was the last guest in your house and what were they staying for? probably my sister or my nephews.

How many long term relationships have you been in? blegh. not many. Whenever I’d know that it didnt have long term potential, id drop it. no sense dragging out the inevitable.

Do you sleep with all the lights out, or do you leave a lamp or even the television on? so for the longest time I kept my room super dark. I slept well. once miller died and kile broke my heart, I couldn’t sleep without the tv playing. I needed to hear something calming and voices talking so I wouldn’t be left with my thoughts. I still can’t turn it off.

Who is one person you have forgiven, but still have not “forgotten” what they have done? i think its easy to say “forgive and forget” but the reality is that once we have endured trauma we don’t easily forget. I think its kind of unrealistic. I’m trying to forgive kile but thats going to take.. i dont know how long. As for what it was... it was just betrayal.. lying. for six+ years. lots of laughing at me.

Are you a fan of Lana Del Rey? I like some of her songs.

Do you know your blood type? o+

Do you know your mother’s birthday? Yes. its coming up.

Have you ever been pregnant? I dont think so. I was really late after my assault but who knows.

How old were you when you first went on a plane? like 7ish

Have you ever had to take out a loan for anything? Yeah, student loans. 15k feels so daunting right now.

Are both of your blood parents still in your life? One is. My mom.

When was the last time you went apple picking? highschool maybe?

Someone asked you what you wanted, what would you say? money.. or a trip.

Have you ever been drunk at school or work? definitely not.

How many bedrooms are in your house? four.

Are you smart about computers? I know some stuff.

Have you ever played Just Dance for Wii? oh heck’n yeah

Do you own a Xbox 360? I had one from my brother for a little while but I traded it for the gamecube since Kile was going to send me one of the 15 he had lol. That didn’t end up happening, but its OK i really dont need more gaming.

Would you ever do a sex tape for a million dollars? oooooooo.. probably not.

So, do you need a nap? all day is full of naps to try and get over this.

What would you rather be doing? school

What sport are you the best at? maybe volleyball or swimming

Do you have a little sister? What’s her name? Nope, im the baby.

Do you complain a lot? no, i try not to. I find complaining to be the most unattractive and yet common human trait and while there are definitely situations worthy of complaining, most of the time it just makes a situation worse than it actually was.

Would you rather go to an authentic haunted house or an ancient temple? temple

Do you like fruity or minty gum? definitely minty

Are you looking forward to any day of this month? i was really looking forward to Kile’s birthday on monday, but since we arent talking anymore then there is no joy in that. all the other special dates have been ruined by covid.

Have you ever gotten detention? Nope. homeschoolers and detention arent a thing.

Is there a traumatic event that you’ve experienced that’s changed your life? oh sure. heartbreak, deaths, assaults, etc.

Do you buy a majority of your clothes from a certain store, or do you just pick out items of clothing you could see yourself wearing, not caring about the store it came from? no, i can’t be super picky because not every store carries clothing long enough for me.

Have any of the artists you’re fond of released new albums recently? i havent got a clue

Would you ever keep your favorite animal as a pet? I mean I’m very fond of cats & dogs

Ever cried so much you threw up? this is what happened the whole 2-3 weeks following finding out about Kile.

Who is your best guy friend? I suppose now that would be Nathan

What do you two do when you hang out? drives, game nights, get food/drinks, or just talk.

What is a movie that you thought you would hate but you ended up loving? Her

Do you even like horror movies? not particularly. I’ll watch them if someone else wants to but its not my preference.

Do you live in the country? i live in the suburbs i suppose.

What is your favorite accent? Some southern and British accents. <same ... i have no idea how I made the font like this.

Have you ever had a boyfriend your parents didn’t like? Not that I can think of.

Do you drink Pepsi or Coke? diet coke

What do you plan to do on your 21st birthday? my family celebrated during the day and then I think nathan took me out on the town

Do you have any person in your family with an addiction to beer? nope.

Do you take a lot of pictures? man. this question is hard. I used to love taking pictures of myself. I had much more self confidence and some of it was because kile LOVED my selfies -- or so he said. and I just had so much fun doing that. Since the heartbreak, I’ve maybe taken 10 selfies. I just don’t have any self confidence in my looks anymore. its so different now. most of my pictures now are of other people or scenery.

What kind of face wash do you use? cerave when I want to. otherwise i use water and a very particular type of fabric.

Does drama always seem to follow you? No, i dont think so.

Does anybody in your family race? like cars? running? no.

Are you closer to your mom or dad? My mom.

How much money did you used to get from the ”tooth fairy?” I think i got it like 2x and it was a dollar.

Do you have a laptop or desktop? Laptop.

Do you like your parents? i love my mom.

Do you secretly like someone? No.

Would you ever date your best male friend? I don’t see any romantic feelings developing between nathan and I

What are you currently listening to? I have gilmore girls on.

Do you want to be single? oooof. Um. I am torn on this subject. On the one hand, i really am ready to be loved, held, protected, cared for, etc. I love the idea of building a life together with someone and us both protecting our unit. I miss supporting, cherishing, loving on someone. Yet on the other hand, im fine being single. I have so much insecurity about myself lately that I dk that anyone else needs to deal with that baggage. Idk

Did you go out or stay in last night? I stayed in. ill be staying in for some time.

Have you pretended to like someone? romantically, no. professionally, yes.

How is your heart lately? Sad. heavy.

Are you wearing socks? not at the moment.

What do people call you? Di, diana, dee, ana, di-nan-na, dine-uh, deenah.

Do you get stressed out easily? no, I really dont

Have you ever been taken to the emergency room in an ambulance? yes

What is wrong with you right now? im sick. im heartbroken.

Do you own something from Hot Topic? not that I know of. if I do, it’d be from like middle school. I never shopped there but people tended to give gifts from there.

Would you rather sleep with someone else or alone? Alone. maybe I havent found the right sort of person to share a bed with.

Do you still talk to the person you last made out with? No.

Have you ever seen your best friend cry? Yes, several times.

Did you get any compliments today? No.

Have you ever gone to a beach? many many many times.

What would you say if someone asked you to get high right now? not my thing. at all.

Do you believe that everything happens for a reason? Yes.

Have you ever done volunteer work just because you wanted to? Yes.

Do you have long nails? they are healthy length. I want to grow them out a bit more.

Do you like the gender you are? Yeah.

Do you generally look nice in photos? Not anymore

Have you ever had a stick insect as a pet? no haha

What colour are your father’s eyes? Blue.

If I handed you a concert ticket right now, who would you want to be the performer? uhhhhm, blue october

Would you ever get into a long distance relationship? maybe not anymore.

What’s your favorite hot beverage? hot chocolate from dunkin

Did you ever play an instrument? If so what? i did. no comment.

Would you rather carve pumpkins or wrap presents? oooooohhhhhhhhh man i love both.

Do you think you’re important? I mean i offer some importance to this world but eh.

What’s the best compliment you’ve ever received? Hmm no idea.

Have you been diagnosed with any mental disorders? no

Have you ever moved to another state or country? If so, how did it feel to be new? No.

Do you know how to properly eat food with chopsticks? Nope.

What was the first thing you ate today? I haven’t eaten since breakfast yesterday

If you could spend the day, doing absolutely anything, with anyone, anywhere, what would it be like? for the longest time it was to spend the day driving aimlessly and getting food and talking about everything and nothing with Kile. now, its just.. idunno. blank.

If I were to ask you how you are doing, and you were only able to answer completely honestly, what would come out? I’m not doing well.

What is the one thing that you have been avoiding that you should do? There’s a few things related to school.

Is there anything that you wish you could take back? not really, no.

What, in your mind, could make you truly happy? this whole covid nonsense going away, heartbreak to soothe, and my miller back.

If you could change one conversation in your life, what would you say differently? Would it have REALLY made any difference? i dont know.

When is the next time you’ll change your hairstyle? Will you color it? I just changed it up so itll be a bit.

Do people normally say you’re a fast typist, or are you rather slow? Fast.

Have you ever been considered the ‘smartest person in school?’ yes. several times.

How many drugs are in your system? lol lots of meds rn to kick this. usually none.

What’s on your schedule for tomorrow? the same as today.

Do you currently have any bite marks/hickeys on your body? No. i dont like the idea of bite marks but hickeys were fun for a time. in not visible areas tho.

Do you call anyone baby? Not anymore.

What’s your current mood? Bleh.

What were you doing before filling out this survey? Watching gilmore girls

How late did you stay up last night? I took PM meds at i wanna say 8? maybe 7? I don’t remember.

When was the last time you cried really hard? its been a few weeks since ive cried about Kile. I’m in the numb stage.

Is your hair longer than your shoulders? hahahahahahah

1 note · View note