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#chef!ghost
boowritess · 1 month
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bonus part 2
simon can't cook-
okay no he CAN. okay? but it's very much- chop up whatever the fuck is in the fridge throw it in a pot, add as much meat he can find. then he's sorted. creating some sort of stew. but if not that. he thrives off 2 minute noodles.
listen, he's a working man. he can't be fucked thinking about what to make.
and if he needs to eat while not deployed and wants something, he'll get takeaways so he doesn't have to think about it.
and if ya'll are together - whatever you make... motherfucker eats that shit up like he's in a 5-star fucking reasturant.
you made scrambled eggs with bacon??? he's astounded. absolutely in love. has never been more satisfied in his life.
but oh lord. when he retires..
retired!simon fucking riley finds his fucking calling in cooking.
you no longer have to worry about cooking. nah-uh. not with this man who has all the time in the world to hone in on this new culinary world.
idk i just think it's so cute to think about simon going from beans on toast for breakfast to fluffy buttermilk pancakes or french toast with bacon a berry compote.
then for dinner; it's suddenly a whole line of sushi with all your favourites, dumplings to follow and a beef udon recipe dish. or maybe it's a simple roast - however, a perfectly seasoned meat has been sitting for a while in the oven for so long that when you cut into it, it's juicy and tender. and simon fucking beams at the faces you make.
dessert is a whole other game that simon fucking mastered. seriously. because he's placing down a skillet brownie, topped with ice cream and cream. And when you put a spoon into it, it fucking drips with chocolate ya'll.
just rahhhh retired!simon that turns into chef!simon. who just spoils you day and night with food. who gains the ability to make whatever dish you want, whenever you want. 3am and you want a grilled cheese? he can whip it up in seconds and it'll taste like the most gourmet grilled cheese you have EVER had.
btw, i'm torn between making him a gordon ramsay in the kitchen or him being the complete opposite and being so sweet and patient with you when you want to help him.
WAIT- speaks like gordon ramsay but treats you softly. like, you're not cutting with the knife correctly you fucking donkey. but instead of taking it off you, he presses up behind you, gently cups your hands with his and shows you how to do it safely. and he's speaking so sweetly and softly. a stark contrast to when he called you a fucking donkey - but hey you'll get your bite back. ;)
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a/n: i can't fucking breathe this was so funny to write. i'm sorry idk why he called u a donkey. i'm fucking hungry if it wasn't obvious with this post.
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spacedace · 8 months
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Thinking about the untapped comedic potential of the Batfam explaining to new hero in Gotham & literal ghost Phantom that they don't kill people.
And Danny, professional menace, responding with "What? You guys have a problem with dead people or something?" In the most serious, insulted voice he can manage just to watch them squirm.
(Jason is having a great time)
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kana7o · 10 months
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[I used to know my place was the spot next to you]
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ghost-recs · 1 month
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Oikawa SMAU Rec
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nonsense by @idlerin
synopsis: university student, chaotic friend group, and up and coming actor/model oikawa tooru as your secret ex, what could go wrong?
the perfect combination of angst, cuteness, and humor that left me a puddle for oikawa tooru (i highly recommend the playlist too, pls pls).
syrup by @eggyrocks
synopsis: oikawa, to put it bluntly, is love sick. unfortunately, there is a bit of an obstacle in the way of his happy ever after with you...
lots of crack and chaos. humor that has me going. [ongoing...]
pose for me by @authentictiramis
synopsis: vlogging au where two groups decide to collab, simping ensues.
short and sweet, full of fluff and some humor. cute!
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hyuckonia · 5 months
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Ghost Chef 1 stronger than me. i woulda quit my damn job or conveniently placed a cleaver into one of my essential internal organs
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ghostdrinkssoup · 1 year
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girls don’t want hannibal season 4 girls want a spin-off show that’s basically master chef but hannibal is the only judge and the rest of the cast are contestants except the catch is they don’t know all the ingredients are people-based (except will who’s desperately trying to convince everyone while also having homoerotic tension with hannibal) and it’s filmed like the special features clips on the shrek 2 DVD
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ohmygraves · 3 months
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thinking about chef au
you were new, wanted to work in a restaurant and learned that one of the famous italian restaurants in town was looking for a new employee. you applied, of course, and after a little test and interview, you got accepted to work there. it seems like the owner chef, john price, took a liking to you.
still, the real challenge came from afterwards. everyone looked down on you in the kitchen, as you were new to the industry. you earned yourself the nickname "bambino/bambina" in the kitchen, "bambi" for short, because not only that you were new, you kept making so many rookie mistakes.
working in the kitchen was hellish. hell, everyone called it a battlefield. you didn't even have breaks the first few days, crouching down near the stove eating the employee's lunch in a hurry before continuing to prepare some ingredients. you were exhausted, beyond stressed, and not to mention pissed off with your supervisor, if you could even call him that.
ghost was the one in charge for the pasta section, and you were placed under him. he never let you near the stove, simply barking orders at you to prepare him all the things he needed.
"bambi! did you de-shell the shrimps!?"
"almost done!"
"hurry the fuck up!"
"bene!"
he pissed you off, truthfully. but you can't lie that he's really good at his job. you tasted some of his cooking, he made staff meals a few times, and his food was amazing. even when he's making mistakes, it didn't faze him, simply going back to work.
he's a pro.
some of the chefs said that he's been working there for a long time, and he was really hard to hang out with. he eats with the owner, doesn't want to go out and meet the customers when they ask to see the chef (which actually happened once, he told you to go see the guests on behalf of him). he sometimes could be seen hanging out with the fan favorite wait staff, johnny, and the antipasto chef, kyle.
there was one time when the front staff didn't have enough, too many people were calling off work, and you had to go help outside of the kitchen. price said that it could be a good opportunity to learn, and everyone who is the current kitchen staff used to work in the front as a waitress for about a year before working in the kitchen. you hated it.
sometimes customers picked on you, though johnny helped a lot. he told you how he was here originally to be a chef too, but many regulars came in just to visit him. he didn't leave for the kitchen, staying to entertain the guests. surprisingly, he didn't mind one bit.
"are you always flirting with the guests every single time?"
"jealous, bonnie?"
"hell no."
johnny did flirt with you a few times. he was the only one who didn't call you bambi.
kyle helped you get settled in, since you're both close in age. he was patient and kind, as close to a friend as you could have in the hellish workplace. there was one time you hurt yourself so badly that you were bleeding all over the place. you insisted on working, but he yelled at you, telling you to go to the hospital. he couldn't leave his post, but he got the dishwasher boy to take you there. you ended up going back to work afterwards, wearing many gloves to cover up the bandages.
"sure you're fine?"
"took painkillers... 'm fine..."
"okay, careful with it. don't want blood on the guests' plates."
you didn't meet könig after a while, until that one time while working up front johnny had you go to the dolce section to get more bread. könig was the only one working there, basically a small room at the back of the kitchen, making bread and sweets by himself. you've never seen him, but it's probably because he always eats by himself during break. he's a recluse, awkward with others, but he's damn good when making sweets.
"you work here by yourself?"
"yeah."
"that's amazing. you're so good at making dolce. everyone liked it!"
he didn't say anything afterwards, but there was a faint smile behind his mask as he rolled out some dough to make bread. you made a note to eat with him sometime in the back, if he wanted to that is.
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itsbeesknees · 10 months
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Stay [Feat. Patrick Wilson]
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Got brain rot over the idea of cod but just….mix in a little magic. You being a cat familiar and part of the 141 or the Vaqueros, sent into Valeria’s base of operations. The plan was just to hide under her desk and leave after her but by some force of god she found you. But instead of just tossing you out or killing you, she seems to take a liking to you, holding you in her lap and giving you the most delightful scratches behind the ears and under your chin. Cuddles with you in her bed at night. They end up having to send Soap in just to get information cause they think you got caught and died but really you’re just living the pampered life.
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holomars-turtles · 1 year
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Ghost in the Shell au doodle because I’m in major art block and I finally read the fic (cried)
Au belongs to @bluepeachstudios
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xmalereader · 4 months
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Five Hargreeves x Chef! Male Reader
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☆ — MASTERLIST — ☆
SUMMARY: After the events of TUA S3, Fives is left without his powers and can finally try to have a normal life without relying on his abilities. Trapped in a his teenage body at the age of fifty he can finally retire at a nice little town, getting himself a job as a waiter in the towns famous ‘Daybreak Diner’ where he befriends the owner and chef of the place. Not only that, but Fives has competition with the bakery across the street.
CONTENT/WARNINGS: Pure fluff, mature language, crossovers between characters, and bakery verse, reader is a chef and an adult, fives is around 15-16 years old, platonic parent, found family, fives and Alex are enemies to lovers, mentions of Simon Riley and his baker husband, cooking, fives hates customers, love sick teenagers.
WC: 1.5K
NOTES: Hello everyone! It’s a new year, meaning new format and new characters and ideas! I’ve actually been thinking about this idea for awhile now and decided to create my own little baker or cooking verse between one of my favorite series of Simon Riley and perhaps a new one starting with Five Hargreeves! Please, feel free to leave some feedback and if you wish to read some more of this cooking verse then I’ll be more than happy to make more!
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Daybreaks Diner was a simple restaurant that served grilled and raw sea food dishes. It was one of the popular places in town that many people went to eat after leaving work either to relax with some alcohol in their system or perhaps a nice shrimp cocktail that many people enjoyed. The place had only been standing for a few years, owned by one single person who did all of the cooking and cleaning before and after closing for the day, everyone in town knew who the chef was and how passionate he is when it comes towards his menu and various food choices.
Some would say that he was in competition with the bakery across the street due to both owners always getting caught conversing with each other, only for the rumor to be shut down after it became clear the the two were simply friends and helped each other out when it comes towards new ideas for their own places.
It wasn’t until their time together slowly decreased going from days to only a few hours. Only to find out that his good friend had recently found someone that helped him in the bakery which later resulted in them getting married and getting the family he always wanted and keeping himself busy in the bakery. The two still talked, but they were both moving on with their lives and busy with their own dreams.
It wasn’t until a year later that he hired a sixteen year old teenager to work in his diner. He was hesitant about the kid at first only to find out that he no place nor a job and was easily persuaded into hiring the kid and evening letting the kid rent out his extra room upstairs. It took some adjusting for him, waking up in the mornings to find the teenager with messy bed hair and drinking black coffee on the small table that he had in his dining room, silent as always only to get a bit chatty when the two head downstairs to prep for the day.
The other strange thing that he hasn’t gotten used to yet was the kids name, Fives.
Did this kids parents hate him so much that they gave him a number for a name?
Fives never spoke about his past nor about his family and kept to himself. That wasn’t until he caught the kid having a nightmare late one night, jolting him awake when hearing the kids scream which caused him to spend the night sleeping on the floor after the kid asked him to stay with him even though his words sounded forced as if he didn’t want him there at all. Y/n didn’t know shit about kids nor did he consider himself a parent since he’s been alone for majority of his adult life to the point where his main focus became his restaurant and now this kid too.
After having Fives live with him for almost six months now, the teenager had grown on him and enjoyed his presence even though the kid himself can be a little sarcastic bastard whenever they were alone.
It was the weekend and the restaurant usually opens late, giving Y/n the time to get everything prepped without any problems as he stood on the other side of the counter, cutting up various vegetables while glancing over to Five who had his face pressed against the glass window, staring across the street with a frown on his face.
“If you keep staring they’ll notice.” He speaks up but Fives doesn’t budge from his spot, glaring down at Alex from across the street at the other teenager worked on writing out todays specials for his fathers bakery. “He thinks some piece of bread with white crap on top is better than my specials?” Fives hissed out, earning an eye roll from Y/n.
When Y/n first introduced Fives to his friend he expected his friends son, Alex to get along only to get the total opposite. Fives loathed the guy and Alex felt the same way towards him. Their hatred started over who’s food was better either the bakery or the diner and neither saw eye to eye and the boys always turned everything into a competition.
“There chocolate filled croissants are good—“
Fives whips his head to glare at Y/n when hearing his comment. He can’t help but laugh at his expression and shake his head, he used to find the kid so intimidating at times and now his looks never phase him anymore. “You two are always fighting.” He mumbled to himself and focused on the fish next and moves around the counter and placed the different ingredients out in order to get lunch ready.
“Come on Fives, clean the tables and set down the chairs the lunch rush is gonna hit soon.” He orders the kid around who does as he’s told, walking around the counter to put on his own apron and tying it around his waist and grabbing a table cloth. It became a regular routine for the two, Y/n prepping the food while Fives cleans the place and gets the tables set for any customer that are to come even though Fives was the only waiter he did the work fast and wasn’t afraid of taking back to customers who talked badly about the food or complained about the smallest things, remembering him threatening a family who couldn’t control their kids running around the place and ruining other people’s nights.
Fives didn’t hesitate to approach the table, slamming the bill on their counter while giving them a wide grin. “If you don’t control your kids I am more than happy to do it for you and believe me it ain’t gonna be a pretty sight.” The parents thought he was joking around and laughed at Fives words only for Y/n to wince at the couples response, knowing damn well that he wasn’t joking.
Fives sighed through his nose before slamming his hand on the table, startling not just the couple but the other customers around them while speaking out loud to them. “Listen here ass, I have spent the last five minutes dealing with your kids running around this place while serving food to everyone else and I am caring around hot and cold plates and if one of your kids bumps into me and gets that food on them, do not complain about your little mistake getting burned.”
Safe to say the parents listened to him and were able to control their kids.
Y/n relied on Fives with situations like that which rarely happened after that day, no one wanted to deal with the teens wrath.
As the two got ready, Fives was the one to turn on the ‘open’ sign on and step outside to wipe down the windows, using a rag to wipe them clean only to stop when he noticed Alex approaching him, making him glare as he focused on his task.
“I’d ask what you’re up to Fives, but then it occurred to me. I don’t care.” Said Alex while entering the resturant, leaving Fives outside who glared at Alex when entering the place, getting Y/n’s attention from over the counter and smiling at the other teen. “Alex! The usual today?” He questions as he began to get the food ready as Alex sits at the bar.
“The usual for dad and for Simon he actually wanted to try one of your specials.” Alex points towards the menu behind Y/n and let him know that Simon wishes to try the third special on the menu.
Y/n works on getting the food ready. “Why do you call him Simon? Why not dad too?” He knows that his friend and his husband have been married for awhile which lead up to Simon finally adopting Alex as his own kid too. “I guess I’m used to it yet?” Alex shrugs his shoulders while leaning his elbows on the counter top and reaching over to steal one of the juice boxes only to get his hand smacked with a towel making him yelp in surprise.
“Hey, thats for customers only.” Fives cuts in, tossing his dirty towel into the sink while Alex grumbled. “I’m a valuable customer here.”
“To me you ain’t, so if you want the juice box you gotta pay.” The two boys glare at each other and Y/n is quick to cut the tension between the two. “Alright that’s enough you two.” He sets a bag of food in front of Alex, “Here you go, also tell your dad to send me some those specials too.”
“I will,” Alex responds while taking the bag with him, shooting Fives a smirk when Y/n slips the juice box in the bag which makes Fives groan as the two watch him leave the restaurant. It was normal for both owners to try each others specials without charge due to them being close friends after so many years together.
Y/n watched Alex, making sure that he got back to the bakery without any accidents, sighing in relief once the teen makes it inside only to turn around to face Fives who had his arms crossed over his chest while frowning. “Do you want me to kill him?”
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gold0kapi · 6 months
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spectralarchers · 1 year
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“This is 7-1, in the blind, how copy? Ghost, this is 7-1, how copy? Fuck... Where are you Ghost...?”
John “Soap” Mactavish - TF-141
ALONE - Las Almas, Mexico - 03 nov 2022 0000
Objective: Survive
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buzzfeedunsolvable · 2 years
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I don’t think I really grasped how Extreme of an upgrade Ghost Files is until I went to rewatch the original BFU Waverly ep
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autumnblooms · 8 months
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Back on my MountainDew bullshit curtesy of @kroas-adtam ‘s Death of Peace of Mind 👀
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Alford Plea
EPILOGUE - Life Sentence
PAIRING:  Chef! Simon “Ghost” Riley x F!Reader 
WARNINGS: it’s nasty, it’s in the kitchen, Simon’s a dick, Reader’s a dick and this is some next level self-insertion. 18+ only.
4 part series + 1 "epilogue", all written, updates every Sat
Part 1 || Part 2 || Part 3 || Part 4 || Epilogue
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Alford Plea: A guilty plea containing a protestation of innocence.
or
Where you knew that fucking your boss could not possibly end well, but you did it anyway, because what else were you going to do?  Not fuck him?
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THEN
He wants to kiss you.
For what feels like the thousandth time that night, Simon Riley finds his attention inadvertently drawn to his chef de partie, and it’s getting ridiculous.  Embarrassing.  Reckless.
He finds that his eyes linger on the soft lines bracketing your mouth when you smile widely, genuinely, the way you lean forward to hear the bartender over the chaos of the bar, the way it makes your skirt ride up on the backs on your thighs.  How, whatever you say makes the bartender giggle and soon, you’re almost hanging across the bar,  your heads close together in an intense conversation  like you’re best friends plotting the end of the world.      
Simon’s attention is dragged away from you and back to the table, and from that point forward, the evening turns raucous.  Though most of the staff are supposed to be back at work bright and early the next morning, the mood is relaxed and the alcohol is free-flowing and discounted. 
But his eyes never drift too far from you.  Fuck, he wants to kiss you, and it’s making him think stupid thoughts.  
He watches you, trying to think of the right combination of words to say to you that will make you open to him the way you’ve opened up to the rest of them.   Simon’s sure of what he wants but he’s in dire need of the courage for it.  There’s a power differential, he’s your employer, and you’ve finally started to get along with him. 
Well.  You’re not at each other’s throats all the time now. 
He looks down at his drink at the sobering thought and hums noncommittally at the tale Soap’s regalling, but when he looks back up, you’re sitting on a bar stool by yourself, looking down at your phone. Now there’s an opportunity, he thinks to himself, as he stands up and gives the table a vague story about getting a refill.  
When he’s at the bar, he has barely a second before you use one gorgeous, bare leg to hook around a bar stool and pull it closer to you.  Your eyes are mischievous, he thinks, bright and shiny and fucking gorgeous, and maybe…maybe he’ll just stay with you for a drink.  Check on you, see how you’re settling in at work.  That’s all.  He’s your employer, you’ve both been drinking, you’re both rota’d on for work tomorrow…the whole thing would be too awkward.  A bad idea, if he’s ever had one.  
But then you throw a roguish grin at him and what he’s wanted all along—to kiss you?  With one smile, you’ve just changed it—you’ve just turned it into a language in his head. 
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You’re funny, he realises.  In fact, there’s so many things about you that he’s never noticed while you’ve been at work, while he’s been too busy barking orders at you or throwing specs at you or breathing down your neck while you’re plating up.   You’re funny and dorky and your smile is…kind of perfect.
And tonight, you’re different with him.  You’re relaxed and the alcohol’s made you bolder and—God help him—you’re flirting with Simon.  You’re laughing and teasing and taunting him, and you’re not too far gone, but you are just tipsy enough to miss when Simon casually switches to drinking water instead.  
It feels like only moments later, so lost you are in each other, that it’s last calls at the bar—the two of you have long since given up on the rest of the staff—and you’re grabbing his hand, intertwining your fingers, and pushing him into a taxi before you stumble in yourself.
You’re laughing with him, at him, and it feels like the easiest thing in the world.  Simon is a mess of instinct and adrenaline and the rush of discovering this new side to you—they all blend together in his mind and his body, and he doesn’t ever ever want it to stop.  So he’s pleasantly surprised when you grab his face, still babbling, still so sassy and you’re about to kiss him, you practically pounce on him but—
“No making sex in my taxi!”   
The speed with which you retreat from Simon leaves him stunned for a second, breathless and when his eyes blink open, your eyes are bright, mischief making the corners of your eyes crease, and you’re using both your hands to stifle the laugh that bubbles in your throat.
Simon laughs and leans back against the seat.  “Alright mate, no making sex in your taxi,” he calls out to the driver.  He turns to you with mock seriousness, trying very hard to hide a smile of his own. “No making sex.”
“In his taxi,” you murmur, looking straight at him, and fuck.  You say it like a promise.
“In his taxi,” Simon repeats, dumbstruck.  There is no ground under his feet, and free-falling has never felt so effortless.
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You’re still giggling uncontrollably, saying…something, struggling with your keys, still failing to open the door to your flat, and Simon finds his arms reaching towards you, almost of their own accord.  He turns you to face him, one hand cradling your face.  His other arm hesitates, then hovers, then settles over your waist, naturally moulding to your contours and lines, and you take one step closer to him.  Into him.  
Simon doesn’t know if it’s the alcohol in your system making you loose and pliant and so fucking warm, but he finds that he doesn’t care.  For what feels like the first time in hours, you’ve shut up.  You’re not giggling or recounting stories or teasing him.  No, you’re doing that thing that women do that drive men like Simon insane.  You’re alternating between looking at his eyes and his lips.  Waiting for him to make the first move.    You lick your own chapped lips, and this is it, Simon thinks.  He’s going to kiss you now, and nothing about your relationship will ever be the same.  He finds the thought scary, unsettling…but all doubt dissipates like tendrils of smoke when he finds that your eyes close and you lean forward all the same.
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NOW
You’re wriggling against Simon, trying to get comfortable, but he only grunts, and his arm tightens in response against your chest.   The unconscious action makes you smile and blush.  Like a moron.
You’d ended up napping on the floor after the night’s…activities, and you’ve got your back to his chest while his back leans against the legs of the deep fat fryer.  Simon’s been kind enough to put his whites down under the two of you, so you have the particular privilege of leaning against his bare chest.  
And it’s…nice.  Comforting.  
The moment’s ruined with the blaring sound of your alarm going off on your phone—it startles you and you curse out loud as you try to shut it off.  He moans in his sleep and you freeze, a quiet whisper of fucking shit leaving you anyway, before he settles.  You’re just starting to relax against him when his arm squeezes around you again, and warm breath is at your neck.
“You are the noisiest woman I know,” he murmurs and kisses your neck slowly.  Gentle kisses, open-mouthed and slow, so you can relish in the feeling of his hot breath on your skin.  He takes his time and all rational thought flees your brain as you relax into it, moaning softly, making his arm tighten around you some more.  
He flips you around slowly, deliberately, giving you the opportunity to refuse him, but his mouth stays blessedly on your skin through it so the thought of protestation doesn’t even enter your mind.  When you’re finally facing him, your first thought is how the streak of early morning sunlight entering the kitchen lights up the brown of his eyes, making them look like the exact shade of honey you prefer in your tea.
“You didn’t mind that so much last night, Chef.”
“Noisy,” he whispers against the skin of your jaw.  “Infuriating and fucking pretty and talented, bratty and loud and…”  Your loud gasp at his audacity only makes him laugh and he draws you closer to kiss you.  He kisses you with all of the previous night’s passion and then some, and you’re particularly enjoying the way his hand moves down your spine, settling on your ass.
“You didn’t mind,” you remind him against his lips.  “In fact, I remember you wanting me to be louder, wanting me to say your name when you were inside me…didn’t you, Simon?”
He groans into your kiss and you gasp when he smacks your ass, then squeezes it.  “Infuriating,” he repeats without any real heat behind his words.
“Yeah.  I think you liked how loud I was…think you liked it the other night too…”
“And I’ll love it tonight.”
That stops you in your tracks.  “Tonight?  You’re awfully optimistic about getting laid again.”
“Yeah.”  It’s all he says, before he’s kissing you again.  The man is not not arrogant a day in his life, and you find that it suits you just fine. 
 “We should probably get out of here,” you whisper.  “Let’s go home, I’ll make some breakfast.  We have to be back here in…” you groan as you note the time, “..two hours.” 
Simon pauses slightly and laces your fingers between his.  “You don’t want to talk about this?”
“Do you?”
“You work for me.  And fraternising with—”
“Fraternizing?”  You can’t help but laugh at him, and you really have to bite it back when he glares at you.  “Sorry.”
Another smack to your ass for the cheek you’re giving him.  “Just for that, I’m putting you on the rota for the next two Sundays.”  He swallows.  “You’re being easier than I thought you’d be.  This is easier than I thought it’d be.”
“I work for you.  You’re my boss, I’m a woman, and if people find out, it’s not going to look good.”  You push his hair back from his face and bring your lips against his again.  “But, I still want this.  Do you?”
The sound that leaves him is pure disbelief, but he kisses you anyway.  It goes on for a while, and you’re left gasping against his mouth when he rearranges you to sit right on top of dick.  His dick which is definitely, ahem, awake, twitching against your clothed crotch.   When his mouth moves to your ear, you hold your breath in anticipation.  “I like crème fraîche in m’scrambled eggs.”
“You’re a bastard,” you gasp, quickly undoing his trousers and seating yourself on him in record time and, oh.  Oh.  He’s deliciously hard inside you.   The shocked noise that leaves his throat makes you gush between your legs and he is instantly fucking up into you, just like he’s discovered you like.  “Such a bastard, Simon,” you moan.
“You like it though,” he huffs.  “Know y’do.  The whole neighbourhood knows you like this.”  His words are casual, but he’s fucking you in earnest now, one arm holding you in place, while the other caresses the back of your hair.  “Know what this sweet cunt likes, pretty.”
“Fuck…”
“Know how you l-like to be fucked.  Gonna make y’come, just like this.”
The words make you blink your eyes open and look at him.  He’s beautiful like this, his eyes warm and affectionate despite the intimacy of what you’re doing, despite how dirty this whole thing is.  “Feels so good, sweet girl.  You want t’come on my cock, love?”
“Simon,” you gasp in response.  There’s a small, delicate spot inside you, and he hits it, nails it, over and over and over, making you feel like this is how you’ll lose your mind.   
“Such a bratty fuckin’ attitude, so confident and sexy in m’kitchen, but you like being bossed around, don’t you?  Like bein’ told what to do.”
“Simon,” you whimper, and it’s the only word you know how to say any more.  Your helplessness seems to encourage him, spur him on, and he bites your neck.  He doesn’t apply any real pressure, and his tongue instantly salves over where his teeth were to soothe your skin, but it’s enough for you.  It’s more than enough for you, and you cry out, clenching over his cock.   His rhythm falters and the sound he makes ends up sounding like he’s straddling the line between heaven and hell right now. 
“Gonna make a mess of’y’love,” he moans.  “Gonna come so deep, gonna stuff you full.  And you’ll keep me inside you, won’t you?”  You’re groaning a yes, please, yes Simon please before he’s even done asking you.  It doesn’t take too long after that, and with a half-shout, Simon’s coming deep inside you.  He thrusts into you through it, pushing it all deep inside you while he shudders and shivers through the aftershocks.  
You lie back down on his chest, trying to calm your breathing but watch as he tilts his head up to the ceiling, mouthing a silent fuck.  A small, satisfied smile breaks out on your face and you close your eyes, but they fly open at his blurted words.     
“I want t’keep doing this.”
“I–yeah, me too.”
Simon’s eyes dart around the kitchen quickly, as though suddenly realising where the two of you were.  “I want to see where this can go.  But.  I dont want y’to feel like I’m takin’ advantage—”
You grab his hand and bring it down to your pussy where you’re dripping.   Almost instantly, like it’s a reflex, he starts to toy with your clit and you jerk from the stimulation. 
“Shut up,” you moan.  “Take advantage whenever you like.”
“Dirty girl,” he grits out, and uses two fingers to gather his come and shove it back into you.  Your eyes fly open at the action and you choke.  “Y’want this?”
“Mmhm, yeah I want this.”
You don’t realise it at that moment, but you’ve both started a chain of events from which there is no going back, for the both of you.  
You don’t realise it but six months from this exact moment—when Simon proposes, in this very kitchen, by this very deep fat fryer—you’ll think back to this.  You’ll think about how all your life, you thought you knew what sex was, what love was, and the difference between the two. 
“Still gonna ride your ass for your limp salads and burnt roux, Chef.”
“Good,” you say, grinning.  “And I’m still gonna make a better ragu than you, Chef.”
Simon scoffs in that patented way that is so Simon, and you can’t help but grin wider.  “Gonna make you work three Sundays, love.”
“Yes, Chef,” you murmur, and kiss him again.
And there it is.  That’s what you’ve begun.  Sex and love and Simon—they’re all about to become the same to you.
____
Taglist: @mykneeshurt || @random-thot-generator|| @xintothewoodswegox
A/N: And that's it folks! Thank you SO MUCH for all the support and the enthusiasm and all the love you've given this series, my pussy is humbled by it all 💕
Alford Plea is officially "complete" (i.e., i've written everything that I originally planned) but I'll pop in with a few drabbles or outtakes, now and then. My request box is also open, so if there's something in particular you want to see...maybe we can make some 💫magic💫 happen?
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