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saintobio · 3 years

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sincerely not. (15)

↳ gojou satoru/reader

with an arranged marriage set in place, the sacred bond is doomed with a wife who wants to make the relationship work and a husband who’s ready to ruin it all. unbeknown to him, a tragic fate already lies within the pages of his romance book.

genre. heavy angst, unrequited love, arranged marriage, modern au, 18+

tags/warnings. profanity, mentions of illness, mentions of miscarriage, pregnancy

notes. 10.2k wc. i enjoyed writing this chapter. enjoy !! beta read by rae as always <3

series masterlist -> episode sixteen

“Your wife is seven weeks pregnant.”

You didn’t mean to wake up at that exact moment. When your eyes had barely adjusted to the fluorescent lights and your mind could not register what you were hearing, you weren’t sure if you were still in a state of REM sleep or if this was reality. You could easily recognize Dr. Mori’s voice and notice how your husband had fallen silent behind the curtains that reflected his lean silhouette. I’m pregnant, you repeated the thought in your head until you finally processed the very idea that a life was budding inside of you. How can this be possible? Your own hand flew straight to your tummy, caressing the bump that wasn’t even visible to the naked eye because all this time, you thought that you were just gaining weight. You thought that your missed period, your sore breasts, your cravings, and all your other symptoms were just byproducts of extreme stress.

How could you have overlooked the possibility of getting pregnant? The last time you had been intimate with your husband, or at least when he last released into you, was when you were in his office on the day before his father’s birthday celebration. Could you have conceived by then? It would make sense because you had forgotten to take your pills on two consecutive mornings which could have lessened its overall effectiveness. It would also explain why they failed to detect your pregnancy when you were diagnosed with stable angina because it would have been too early to show in your blood results.

On a one in a million chance, your conception was actually a shocker.

But more than that, what were you supposed to do with this information? Why—instead of rejecting the thought—were you actually fluttering with indescribable bliss? Each time you caressed your belly, your heart was bursting into flames and you could feel happy tears pooling your eyes before you blinked them away. No, you should not cry. Not when you still had no idea what your husband would say to this.

I have his baby. We have a baby.

There had been a long-standing argument between you two regarding the topic of pregnancy and you were dreading to have another round of conflict and outburst about a baby that you have accidentally created together.

Gojou seemed to be quite shaken, too. After a few more inaudible exchanges with your doctor, your husband came back and slipped inside your section of the ER with a ghostly expression. His eyes briefly scanned your face, somber as he pulled a chair close to your bed and rested his head on your tummy as though he was listening to his unborn baby. His actions left you taken aback while you could see how hard he was suppressing the pensive sadness in his mien—afraid that you weren’t happy, afraid of the worst case scenario. What was he thinking of, really? Why were his eyes forlorn?

Because he couldn’t break the silence, you were the one who made the effort to do so. “Is that the face you make after finding out that I have your baby?”

He was cognizant of your little attempt to lighten up the mood, but he could not hide the faint tear that left his eye. “D-Did you know? Before this…?”

“No. I wasn’t aware.” It was true. Just like him, it was your first time hearing about it and you had no idea how you should take it. You knew deep inside that you wanted to cry out of joy because you didn’t expect that carrying a tiny human would bring this much felicity to your heart, but the circumstances were quite different. Your lassitude had gotten the best of you and rendered you powerless to react strongly about your pregnancy. “I didn’t know I was pregnant all this time.”

Gojou’s eyes were glazed with pain and your caring instinct prompted you to run your thumb across his rosy cheek. “How about your heart condition? Were you aware?”

What answer would not spike up his guilt? You had to tell him the truth either way. “I was,” you gave an honest answer. “I found out after Bora Bora—”

You couldn’t finish the sentence because he closed his eyes in despair, burying his face on your stomach and painfully mouthing the word ‘sorry’ with a soundless voice. It seemed like he was apologizing to both you and your child. “I caused this. I’m sorry. I know saying sorry won’t even cut it. I hurt you so much and now you… you’re suffering even more because of m-me.”

“Satoru… Look at me.” Your voice was calm as you caressed his cheek. “About my heart, it was hereditary. It’s not because of you.”

“The doctor himself told me that stress was also a main factor.” He wiped his face and looked up at you as if his world was collapsing in front of him. “I’m unforgivable, aren’t I? I know you don’t wanna keep our baby—”

“Stop.” For a moment, you had to draw in a deep breath because the gravitational force of your pain could bring you six feet under. He mustn’t have realized that there was a wave of ache in your heart after he assumed that you didn’t want your baby. Maybe it was your motherly instinct, maybe you just loved the thought of being a mother in general. In the midst of your husband’s breakdown, you kept your palm on your belly. “As long as I can carry safely, I wanna keep the baby.”

There, you made your decision. And him? Well, Satoru was suffering from the demon inside his head. You could sense his mind going haywire while possibly recounting the poignant memories of the unforgivable things that he did to you, forming his own conclusion to trace down how your heart condition had ultimately worsened because of him. “You’re fragile. It’s all because of me. I destroyed you.”

You pulled him by the arm, watching how helplessly distraught he had become. “Don’t punish yourself. It’s in the past.”

“I don’t deserve you.”

“Maybe you don’t,” your blunt response merited its own reason, “but our child deserves a father.”

Wasn’t it ironic that you were the one with an ill-heart and yet you could handle your emotions far better than a six-foot tall man? But then again, you couldn’t blame him. He was going through a difficult period and he hasn’t even fully healed from everything that happened yet. Several weeks ago, you swore to yourself that having Gojou as the father of your child would be an absolute nightmare. But now that it happened, now that it came true, all you wanted was for him to man up and take the responsibility of being the head of your future family.

After the death of a loved one comes the birth of another. After the rain, the sun would shine again. Instead of being sucked into a black hole, your stars were still bright despite not being aligned. Your marriage had its own vicissitudes and your marital relationship was far from anyone’s definition of perfect, but your child was a blessing that you ought to cherish and protect and nurture. Surely, it was a heartbreaking, gut-wrenching thought to realize that Nana didn’t even make it in time for the news of your pregnancy, but some things were uncontrollable and the universe simply loved its cruel games. Nana’s death was the supernova and your baby was the precious new star in a stellar nebula.

You hadn’t even moved an inch before your husband’s forehead was already pressed against yours. His crystalline blue eyes were seeking your forgiveness. “Satoru. We’re not in the best circumstance, but we need to be good parents.”

“What about your heart?” His inner turmoil had risen tenfold.

“I’m sure it’s not fatal to carry a baby,” you reasoned, trying to look at the bright side like you always did. Hopeful? Positive? God, let it manifest. You didn’t want to hear about any negative outcomes that could affect your baby. “I’m gonna need to consult Dr. Mori about this.”

Considering the number of medications that you were taking, you already knew that the doctor would lessen the amount of medicines prescribed to you. You would also most likely deliver the baby through c-section because it would guarantee both you and your baby’s safety a lot more than a normal delivery could offer. There were many things that had to be discussed to avoid further complications and you needed to make sure that your baby’s health would be prioritized above all.

“I’ll take care of you.” Satoru’s voice cracked as he made his vow, clutching your hands as though he was holding on for dear life. “I’ll take good care of you and our baby. I promise I’ll repay your kindness and be there for you. I know I’m awful as a husband, but I won’t fail as a father.”

You acknowledged the desperation in his voice, the seemingly repeated chants of promises and apologies that his mind was torturing him with, and pulled him for an embrace to provide his much needed comfort. “I know you will.”

Later that day, you were free to go home but you chose to speak to your doctor about your condition who informed you that a) he would lessen the dosage of your medications b) you would need to follow a strict healthy lifestyle and that c) cardiopulmonary bypass could be dangerous if your condition worsened and your heart deteriorated significantly throughout your pregnancy. The maternal death rate and fetal loss for these situations were not alarming, but it was still something that you would need to prevent.

“There is only one report of coronary artery bypass surgery during pregnancy in a thirty six-year old patient with severe angina and a 90% stenosis of the left main coronary artery,” explained Dr. Mori as he enlightened you and your spouse, “The patient was twelve to fourteen weeks pregnant and later delivered a normal child.”

Your hopeful husband squeezed your hand. “How do we ensure that my wife’s going to be safe all throughout like her?”

Dr. Mori tilted his head and looked at you behind his thin-framed glasses. “Coronary angioplasty is a good alternative especially in a case of essentially single vessel disease with a proximal lesion in the left anterior descending coronary artery,” he considered. “Although there is a small risk of complications that can lead to the need for urgent operation, angioplasty does not require a general anaesthetic and cardiopulmonary bypass.”

So what you were getting at was: you could eliminate your angina by means of angioplasty?

“How about the exposure to radiation?” you inquired, touching your belly protectively. “If I’m gonna get angioplasty, that’ll subject my baby to radiation.”

The doctor took notes as he continued to discuss the possibilities. “We will reduce fetal irradiation by limiting the exposure time and we’ll protect the fetus with lead shields. Everything will be well within the limits of acceptable risk to the fetus.”

You traded looks with your husband and said nothing else. Zero words. It was obvious that he was overthinking while you were keeping your silence because you just realized how complicated things actually were. And it seemed that as soon as you would consent to undergo coronary angioplasty, the doctors would be ready to administer the procedure to you in a heartbeat. But how about your dad? How about your sister? Would you simply hide all of this from them? What would you explain to them once you get admitted to the hospital?

“It’s not urgent. I’ll place your wife's condition under thorough clinical case study together with other veteran doctors,” the doctor reassured, interlocking his fingers above his desk. “We’ll ensure that enough research will be made so that the application of this technique will allow Y/N to have an angina free pregnancy and delivery. In the meantime, she needs full care and has to avoid angina triggers because taking nitrates can affect the fetus.”

Satoru offered a nod, planting a kiss on your knuckles as the trajectory of his emotions finally arrived at a calmer state. “Can we request Dr. Ieiri on this, too?”

“Dr. Shoko Ieiri?” the doctor clarified.

“Yeah. She’s a close friend of ours,” you confirmed, already feeling relieved that Ieiri would be part of the primary doctors that would look after you because she was one of the few who had been aware of your heart condition. “Doc, I’m still hoping that you won’t disclose my condition to Gen and my father. I’ll find the right time to tell them.”

“You have my word.”

The change of atmosphere was almost tangible. It appeared that Satoru had decided to change his demeanor when you came home that night, ridding himself of his unstable emotions and working on being a more resilient spouse. It was noticeable because he was treating you with utmost sensitivity knowing how twice as fragile you had just become. You could tell that the revelation of your illness overlapping your pregnancy still messed with his mind, but you constantly gave him the reassurance that you would feel more at ease if he wasn’t stressing himself out.

To put it in another perspective, Gojou was a businessman and an excellent decision-maker. When a company is seeing a loss of revenue, his immediate decision would be to find the root cause before making an action plan. There was no point in moping around and finding someone to blame. This was a tactic that he could also apply to your difficult situation now. Actions, not by words, but actions progressing instead of regressing.

Despite the negative aspects of your life, there were also positive things to note about this change of atmosphere. For one, your husband—someone who has rarely cooked his own dinner before—was the one in charge in the kitchen tonight to make you a nice, healthy meal. It was nothing big, but certainly a great first step towards his lifelong vow. When he was standing behind the stovetop, a hand on his hip and an apron that he so unwillingly tied around his waist, how could you complain? It was the very image of a househusband that stretched your lips into a smile.

“Kale salad with Meyer lemon vinaigrette,” you read the recipe on your phone before you took another spoonful—or in this case, a fork full of leafy greens into your mouth. The concoction of Meyer lemon and avocado already satisfied your cravings perfectly and this wasn’t even considered your dinner yet. Chef Satoru was still cooking your requested pan-seared sirloin steak in rosemary garlic and just the smell of it alone was making you drool. “I’m so hungry. It smells so good.”

“Almost done, baby.” He neatly transferred the thick chunk of sizzling no-gristle meat into a plate, slicing it in bite size to lessen your work before he placed the meal in front of you. “Don’t judge my cooking skills.”

“I won’t.” You were thankful enough that he was even making the effort in spite of the abyss of depression that was trying to pull him down. So in gratitude, his efforts shouldn’t go unnoticed and you rewarded him with a quick kiss. “Thank you.”

He smiled into the kiss as if he was melting inside, like a block of solid butter that had been absorbed by the steak he just cooked not more than a few minutes ago. “One more kiss,” with a hand on your back, he pressed his lips down into yours once more. “I love you.”

Your heart was full even when you hadn’t started eating yet. Satoru as a husband was generous at throwing I love you’s and you wondered if he had always been like that around other women. Was he? The thought stirred some doubt in your head and you were already glaring at him before you knew it. Look at that jerk’s face. He could have said meaningless words of affection to hundreds of women before you. No, you stayed calm. Pregnancy hormones. You were laughing to yourself at the realization. Laughing, shaking your head, and drinking your strawberry banana smoothie on top of your brain’s newfound humor.

“Are you okay?” Satoru’s confused expression was nonetheless one that said: is my wife crazy?

The lean meat was both buttery and savory when you took your first bite. “Yeah,” you later answered, gesturing for him to sit on the bar stool across from you. “Does it make you feel weird when I’m irritable around you?”

He used his thumb to wipe the grease on the corner of your lips. “Not really. You have reasons.”

Good. You continued eating then, engaging yourself in small conversations with your husband about your certain cravings and symptoms until the clock struck eight and he was already putting the dishes away. He wouldn’t even let you move an inch from your seat. “We need helpers around the penthouse. You can’t be doing this all the time,” you pointed out. Okay, but considering that, you two would have less privacy. Having maids would mean that you could no longer walk around the penthouse half-naked, or do the deed with your husband in every possible location inside the spacious apartment. “Nevermind. I think we’re fine by ourselves.”

Satoru didn’t pick up the hint on your last sentence. “No, you’re right. I need someone to look after you while I’m at work. I’ll make sure they give me updates every hour.”

Crazy how fast a night could change. The memory of you walking out of the grand ballroom after announcing a divorce was still vivid in your mind. Now, here you were, pregnant and unwarrantedly ill with a husband still recuperating from his loss.

“Okay,” you ended up agreeing, “I can focus on designing new clothes in the other room while you’re in the office so you don’t have to worry too much.”

But adamant was your husband at saying no. “You can’t be left alone. I’ll probably lessen my time in the office and do online meetings whenever possible.”

“Satoru, don’t do that. You have work responsibilities.”

“But I can—” Yep, he realized soon enough that arguing with a pregnant woman was futile, which in result, made him discontinue his sentence. What he did was wrap his arms around you from behind, rubbing your tummy with his large hand and kissing the surface of your temple along with it. “I can’t wait to see our little munchkin.”

Why, just why did his nickname for your baby make your heart jump? “Little munchkin.” You giggled. “I’m gonna be a mommy.”

He buried his face on the crook of your neck—a trait he always did whenever and wherever. “You’re fulfilling a husband’s dream right here, wife.”

You never truly expected that being pregnant would make you this happy. Not just for you, but also for Satoru who had always kept his childhood promises close to his heart. The realization that not just two, but three people with the tiny one inside you, were in the confinements of your home transported you to a euphoric paradise. This was your family now.

The two of you decided to adjust to your new life by taking gradual steps since then. For the next five days, Gojou was shown to be a lot more hands-on than you initially thought. Of course, moments of wistfulness still visited him especially whenever he remembered his late grandmother because the wounds were still fresh and they constantly carved a searing burn in his tortured mind. There were instances where Satoru would also get lost in thought, pondering about the suspicions that Nana’s caregiver had told him about her death. He hasn’t even spoken to his father for a week now despite the constant phone calls that he received from him and the only time he would ever respond to anyone on his rectangular gadget was if it was either from his mom, secretary Miwa, or his best friends.

His five days, however, were entirely spent with you. It was enough to let him decide that your staff of four maids could live in the smaller apartment next door so you two could technically still have some couple’s privacy when necessary. An intercom system was there for you if you needed your maids’ assistance and you had chefs coming over day and night to make you all the healthy meals that your body required. Your husband was quite strict with the food you would consume on a day-to-day basis as he constantly reminded the staff to ensure that all ingredients were completely safe for a pregnant woman. That meant no raw or undercooked meat, poultry, fish, shellfish, and eggs. Gone were the days of sushi and sashimi, and everyone must comply with your husband’s orders or else they would be fired.

You were treated no less than a queen in your household. Satoru was making sure that even he, the king, would bow at your feet with every request you made. Lemon bar at 3 AM? He stumbled half-awake into the kitchen in his boxers just to bring your cravings to you. Throwing up early in the morning? He was there to hold your hair and rub your back while you puked into the toilet bowl. The funniest, perhaps most ridiculous of all, was whenever you got a wave of hormonal changes that you never noticed before. Your husband was the recipient of your annoyance when you nagged at how disgusting he was for drinking straight out of the milk carton, and then proceeded to cuddle with him on the couch as if none of it happened. At some point, you even teared up when he read your baby a bedtime story despite the so-called story being a book on how to create uncontested market space and making good business strategies.

“It’s a boy. I can feel it. He’ll be my heir.”

You disagreed, smiling as you raked your fingers through his snow white hair. “I think it’s a girl.”

According to C.J. Hamilton, ‘Happy women, whose hearts are satisfied and full, have little need of utterance. Their lives are rounded and complete, they require nothing but the calm recurrence of those peaceful home duties in which domestic women rightly feel that their true vocation lies.’

This life with Satoru might be too good to be true.

But you being the hopeless romantic, you cherished every minute of it. Your heart was content and blissful all the more.

On the last day of your husband’s extended bereavement leave, reality hit you. Tomorrow, he would be back to fulfill his duty as the Vice President of a large conglomerate while you would spend your day in the fashion studio together with your seamstress to finish your gift for the Zen’in kids.

Actually, reality slapped you harder when you realized that you and your husband weren’t the only people living in this bubble of domesticity. You had families to communicate with and your situation certainly required your father and sister’s enlightenment who have all been patiently waiting for your next visit to the mansion.

As for Satoru, it was inevitable to hide your pregnancy when his mom entered the penthouse that day just before lunchtime and brought you ramen noodles, gyoza, and kikufukus from her husband’s restaurant downtown. He wasn’t going to reveal it to her, but she had accidentally walked into her son in a kneeling position while feathering kisses to your belly which fueled her otherwise untimely surprise. Obviously the elephant in the room had to be addressed and you were the one who unfolded the not-so-secret news.

“You’re really pregnant?” Her mouth fell agape as soon as you revealed it to her.

You responded with a meek nod. A proud husband was standing next to you, holding the slope of your shoulder in an affectionate stance. “Two months by now.”

“Oh, my! I’m gonna have a grandkid!”

Yes, she did cry. You figured that this was a normal reaction for a parent to have knowing that her child was now, in fact, soon to be a parent, too. Her reaction made you believe that this would’ve also been your own mom’s reaction if she had found out that you were expecting. It was amazing how an unborn baby could put someone into happy tears. Moreover, it was heartwarming to the absolute core to know that your baby was the focal point of another person’s joy.

“Satoru, you’re going to be a father now.” His mother cupped his cheeks. “I know you’ll be a wonderful dad. I trust that you will.”

Your mother-in-law’s words also translated to: ‘you better not turn out like your dad’ and maybe ‘treat your wife the way you want to be treated’. Except, she wasn’t aware of her son’s earlier infidelity but that was something she didn’t need to know.

Even with little Nina running to greet her favorite and apparently ‘most generous and handsome’ uncle, Gen didn’t have it in her to acknowledge her brother-in-law with the same enthusiasm.

It had been a week since she last saw you and she was still expecting an explanation regarding the supposed divorce that got halted because of Nana’s sudden death. Your father was kind enough to greet the Gojou heir, welcoming him into the living room as you sat next to your husband with intertwined, ringless fingers. Was Satoru nervous? He should have no reasons to be anxious if he didn’t do anything wrong, right?

Gen had chosen to remain silent with Nina on her lap, scrutinizing Satoru’s every move while your father tried to gauge the said son-in-law’s emotions. For the most part, his vivid cerulean eyes were dull and they met the tips of his arctic white hair with his lack of usual styling.

“Son, how’ve you been?” your father asked out of courtesy, sipping on his Arabic coffee soon after.

The white-haired man cleared his throat and sat straight. He couldn’t even look at Gen’s eyes. How funny. “It’s been better, dad. Y/N has been with me all throughout.”

“It’s her role as a wife,” Gen stated the obvious with a stern voice. Why bother beating around the bush when they could go straight to the damn point? “My sister’s such a good wife, isn’t she? Way too good, even. How come she’d want a divorce?”

“Gen.” Your father warned, and thus garnering the awkward silence in the room.

When you took a deep breath, Gen already expected that you would be speaking on behalf of your cowardly husband. “Dad, Gen… I know things may be confusing, but I just wanna clear out that Satoru and I are fine. The divorce was… Well, we had an argument and I said things I didn’t mean.”

Lies, thought Gen. Even your dad didn’t believe your bullshit because, for goodness sake, you can’t fool the family you grew up with. You were a kind, patient, and sympathetic woman who would never decide on things rashly unless provoked. So, why were you lying for Satoru? And why the hell was your husband looking so regretful? He was like a cat with folded ears after being caught stealing food on a table.

“I just need to hear it from you, darling.” Although your dad spoke in a calm tone, he was anything but. “Are you happy?”

The repeated blinks. The breath you restrained. Satoru squeezing your hand. Gen caught it all. Whatever reason would leave your mouth, she would no longer believe it.

“Yes,” you said your lie just as your sister expected. “I’m happy, dad. Don’t worry. I’m actually here to deliver some news.”

News? Gen glanced at Satoru who was gazing at you with eyes full of overwhelming love. It seemed genuine yet so hard to trust. “What is it?” your sister probed, hoping that it was something to rejoice about.

The hand on your belly was the answer. No wonder you were wearing a prairie dress today, but there was nothing much to show on your barely-there bump either way. Just the unusual radiant glow on your face and the clear attachment to your husband. Gen has had her fair share of this experience, so she knew all too well that a man would be ten times more attracted to a pregnant wife. It could explain the hearts in his eyes whenever he looked at you.

“Pregnant?” your father’s eyes lit up. “Darling, you’re pregnant? Is that right?”

“Mommy, I have a cousin!” Nina cheered on.

As for Gen, she smiled for you and you only. “Congratulations, Y/N. You finally have a baby!”

It was a bitter feeling that, not long ago, Gen always had conversations with Satoru on how to get his wife to conceive a boy. They were a lot closer back then and she treated him like a younger brother not just by law, but by blood. Now, she could barely smile at the guy, much less trust him.

But setting her feelings aside, the expected fusillade of questions happened after and they all came from your dad: since when? Is it a boy or a girl? Are you healthy? Are you craving anything specific? Oh, boy, was your father ready to send a truck full of groceries to your house. Gen hasn’t seen him go through a whirlwind of positive emotions like this since your mother was still alive and it was almost difficult for Gen to cut the wholesome scene. Keyword: almost.

“Y/N, can I have a word with you in private?” Unfortunately for you, Gen’s smile was evanescent. And your husband? He was encouraging you to go, though he was clearly hurt by his sister-in-law’s ice cold treatment towards him.

Your father agreed nevertheless. “You should go. Satoru and I have to talk, too.”

Ah, the business talk. Gen heard about it beforehand. The Chairman of CFG was to let Satoru Gojou know that the merger would not push through. That even if his wife was pregnant, it was not worth risking the business ties that they already established prior. Of course, Creston would still hold a large part of the Gojou Group’s core investments so that was not entirely a ‘cut-off’. It was merely a business decision to keep two companies from clashing and hence, a merger could only be detrimental than beneficial.

To you, it wasn’t about business. When Gen guided you into the balcony, she leaned against the balustrade while you looked ahead towards the familiar view of the Tokyo bay.

Only the susurration of the wind and the chirping of birds could be heard until Gen opened her mouth. “Tell me honestly. Are you staying with him because you have a baby? I’m sure you wouldn’t have asked for a divorce if you knew you were pregnant beforehand.”

“Gen.” A deep sigh crawled out of your lips. “I already told you, we had a petty fight and I announced the divorce on a whim. It wasn’t anything serious.”

Your protective sister crossed her arms. “I fight with my husband too, but it’s never to a point where I ask for a divorce,” See? Gen hit bullseye with that, “and let’s not forget that you’re far more patient than I am.”

What else could you expect from a CEO of a huge financial conglomerate? She was a calculating and perspicacious leader. Even more, her husband earned the title of being one of the top lawyers in his firm. Imagine the logical, systematical, and methodical conversations they had to have shared in bed. There has to be a sensible answer to all her queries. Otherwise, you were clearly submitting to her suspicions.

“I’m pregnant.” You were sighing as you responded, a hand on your belly as you met your sister’s eyes. Gen felt bad somehow. “My emotions were fluctuating, that's why I gave him the ultimatum of a divorce. I didn’t mean it. Those were my hormones.”

Regardless of that, she was still doubtful and could not even hide it. “Did Satoru cheat on you? He’s not treating you right, isn’t he?” She released a heavy exhale. “Your marriage is arranged after all. You don’t even wear your rings.”

To think of it, your immediate reaction when Gen mentioned the rings was to hide your hand behind you. “It’s my marriage, Gen. I really appreciate that you’re so protective of me and I love you for it. So much. But when I say we’re fine, please trust me.”

That answer was not a direct response to her questions. It was vague with a clear inclination to convince. In other words: mind your own business, Gen.

Fine. Whatever, then. Gen still ended up embracing you into her arms and giving you all the advice that you needed as a previously pregnant woman herself. You were able to soften up into the conversation when she delighted about how blissful it would be to hear your baby’s first heartbeat or feel its first kick. The excitement was pretty much visible on your face and you were deeply in love with the thought of being a mother—Gen could feel your happiness exuding. Your radiance, blinding. Your husband? Revolting. But Gen decided not to show her animosity more than she already has.

Satoru had it easy with your dad because the old man was kind enough to explain the business matters with his son-in-law. Although Gen suspected that he was only in a good mood because of the news of his grandkid, whereas he would have been less genial to your husband while the questionable divorce was on the table.

From what Gen gathered here, no divorce would proceed to happen. The merger was no longer in further consideration. A new baby would be welcomed into the family in seven months. That was it? Why did it feel like she was missing a puzzle piece?

“Take care, okay?” Gen wished you well as your husband guided you into the backseat of your Rolls Royce. “Eat healthy and avoid stress.”

“I will, nee-chan.” You chuckled, addressing your older sister with that tone that she used to feel annoyed with. She loved you, though. And she liked seeing your smile.

Satoru was giving a respectful 90-degree bow to his wife’s father and sister just before he got inside the car. “We’ll get going.”

Sure, you have cleared the air about your marriage, but that night when Gen was preparing for a good night’s sleep, she had to bring up the topic to her husband. He was surprised about the pregnancy, nothing special. But that was not the main dish on the 8-course meal.

“Adultery is marital misconduct, so that means alimony will be shouldered by the suspected spouse once proven, right?”

Her husband flipped the pages of the case report that he was reading in bed about a defendant’s alleged tax evasion. “I don’t have other women, you know.”

Gen let out a soft chuckle. “I know.”

In a more serious answer, her husband continued. “Where adultery is proven, the respondent will pay for a hundred percent of the costs of the divorce. Alimony will depend on a case-to-case basis. It should be specified in their prenuptial agreement.”

“Do the math here,” she proposed the financial situation by using the most dominant currency in the world, “Satoru has a two-billion dollar net worth prior to their marriage and that’s excluding his overall shares in their company. My sister only has seven hundred million dollars as of now, but that’s because she hasn’t received the total inherited assets yet.”

Her husband seemed intrigued with the mention of yours and Satoru’s name. “Any assets brought into the marriage will remain that person’s separate property. He can walk away with his two billion and Y/N can keep her seven hundred million, but any assets earned during the marriage are subject to division.”

Shit. Gen knew that, but still… “In ten years time, my sister will be worth eight billion. So, how’s that—”

“Satoru will more or less be worth twenty-five billion by then,” he stated his point to counter Gen’s logic. “If he’s set to be the sole inheritor of the Gojou Group, he has more to lose than she will.”

Gen was thankful as hell that she married a lawyer because this would be greatly advantageous to their family on the grounds of a divorce. She might be overreacting about this, but she truly just wanted the best for her sister. She wouldn’t let her be trampled upon and stripped of her rightful assets just because of a failed marriage. No, Satoru should be the one to suffer from the consequences.

All she needed for now was concrete proof.

So with that in mind, she headed towards the balcony to get some fresh air before she dialed her assistant’s number who quickly answered the phone in less than three rings. Gen did say sorry for calling her so urgently at this time of the night, but she had to.

“Do you have any means of getting a good source of information from the Gojou Group?” she ordered, breathing deeply into the phone. “I need you to look into Satoru’s potential affairs.”

Eula was surprisingly a good actress.

It wasn’t like she had no conscience, but she was left with no choice except to hide any possible trace of being the cause of Nana’s death. She even had to pay the pathologist a butt load of money just to ensure that the autopsy would confirm a heart attack as the primary reason. She was off the hook because of her cunning personality and her clueless husband was still an idiot who couldn’t see beyond her lies.

However, the guilt was still eating her alive each time she would wake up in the morning because the so-called guilt was on the physical existence of her son, Yuuta Okkotsu—the very son she raised on her own after her partner knocked her up and abandoned her. It was the same son who was the only person aware of her crime.

She couldn’t trust her own flesh and blood. With the way Yuuta was acting weird since that gruesome night, she knew that she had to do something to prevent him from spilling any suspicious information. He’s a kid, she considered. Such an honest kid like him could be a dangerous threat to her.

“Don’t you think you should fly to Massachusetts soon?” she asked the carrier of her guilt, patting the dust on his shoulder as they stood at a distance out of earshot from her husband. Thankfully, the golf course was wide enough from any prying ears and the old man was too busy swinging his club towards his aim that he paid no attention to his wife.

Yuuta adjusted his cap and barely saw his mother eye-to-eye. “I leave in three months, mom.”

“I know, but wouldn’t it be better that you settle early and make some friends?” Her tone made it seem as though she was concerned.

Her son, on the other hand, had a face filled with remorse. “Mom, you should just admit to your—”

“Do. Not. Start with me right now, Yuuta Okkotsu.” She put a heavy emphasis on every word, panicking internally as she looked around to see if anyone had heard.

Yuuta flinched from her voice and slumped his shoulders while scooting away from his mother. “It’s not right that you’re putting the blame on my brother.”

She snorted. “Satoru? To hell with that. He’s been treating you like a dog because he knows he’s the legal heir. Don’t feel bad for him.” Legal by law and blood. If Eula had the option to bring Nana back to life, she would be willing to exchange that bastard Satoru in return. He was the main obstacle that she couldn’t seem to get rid of.

“Onto the next course!”

The caddie’s announcement forced Eula and Yuuta to cut their conversation because her husband was now fast approaching, rotating his gloved wrist while heading his way towards the golf cart. His caddies followed him like a tail as they carried all of his clubs and sealed him from the afternoon heat with an umbrella.

“My love, you did great!” Eula praised and drowned him with compliments, sending Yuuta a sharp wary look before looking back at her husband. “You’re so athletic.”

The old man stretched his arm, chin nodding forward. “Yuuta, don’t you wanna give it a shot? Satoru never lets me score better than him.”

Satoru, again. Her husband always mentioned that stupid son of his whenever she accompanied him for his weekend leisures. It was always ‘Satoru is great at tennis, Satoru is great at polo, Satoru is great at horse racing, Satoru this and that’ — Who the fuck cares? The kid grew up playing all of the rich people's sports accessible to him so her husband shouldn’t compare him to her humble son, Yuuta. Besides, wasn’t he the one physically abusing his own son whenever he wasn’t pleased?

“I’ll try my best, dad.” Yuuta’s answer received a pat on the back.

But before they could get in their carts and move to the next course, an approaching cart from three familiar faces caught the Gojou family off guard. The dark hair, scarred lip, feminine lashes, muscular build.

“Ah, Toji Zen’in.” Her husband greeted the man as soon as he, his son, and Yuuta’s friend got off their golf cart. Eula’s heart was rapid inside her chest and her curious eyes looked around to see if a certain blond with sharp eyes was here, too.

“Mr. Chairman. Good to see you.” There, they exchanged a few words of fake acknowledgement while the kids greeted each other. Toji was never one to display an antagonistic demeanor towards his business rival, but there was still tension whenever the two families crossed paths. “I didn’t know you played golf here.”

The older man smiled. “I didn’t know you played golf at all. You made me think you’re gonna be a Formula One driver.”

The shared chuckles—fake. Eula gave no shit about their pretentious friendship. Or business connection. Or whatever act of courtesy they were pulling. She didn’t join the conversation because rich people always used highfalutin jargon that she couldn’t keep up with. All she cared about was whether Naoya was with them because she hasn’t seen the man for a few days now and neither was he responding to her text messages. Was he with another woman? Perhaps younger? Eula was boiling, seething inside. If she ever caught him entangled with another beautiful woman, God forbid what she would do to that girl’s face.

“—it’d be nice to play with you next time, Toji,” Eula cut out of trance as she heard her husband say those words to the Zen’in guy. Well, that was until her husband received a phone call, excusing himself from the conversation to immediately take it. “Hello?”

During that moment, Toji was looking at his son and pulling the younger man by the nape. “Greet your elders, Megumi.”

“Good afternoon, Mrs. Gojou.” The boy with long lashes immediately gave her a courteous bow while Yuuta and Maki (?) or was it Mai (?) were busy having their conversation on one side. Megumi certainly took after her dad and Eula couldn’t deny the flawless genes that flowed through the Zen’in bloodline.

“Nice to see you two.” She returned the gesture towards the father and son, soon taking her chance to ask about Naoya. “That other man, the blond… Is he not with you?”

Toji’s eyes were humorless, but the sly curve of his lips said otherwise. Was he aware? “Naoya? He’s not with us.”

“Hates golf,” added Megumi. “He’s with S—”

The young man’s father chimed in. “Your outfit looks good on you, Mrs. Gojou.”

While she appreciated the compliment, Eula wanted to hear what Megumi was about to say. However, she never had the chance to ask again because her husband’s imposing voice scandalized the rest of the people within the stretch of green fields in that golf course.

“What do you mean Y/N’s pregnant? Why didn’t Satoru tell me right away?!”

A gasp from Yuuta. A smile from Maki. A mirroring image of wide eyes, parted mouths, and immobile bodies from Toji and Megumi combined. The caddies, the staff, and the rest of the others were in total shock from the sudden news and Eula almost fainted because of it. She was far from pleased to hear about this because a) the baby would be another obstacle when it came to matters of inheritance and b) that baby would definitely bring Shinzo closer to his son.

But then again, it could become a good distraction from Nana’s death.

How in God’s name should Eula even react to it?

The information about your pregnancy had spread like wildfire to the point that it even reached the local news.

Satoru clearly didn’t want to stress you out, but it seemed that his father had apparently found out about your pregnancy in a very public place, which of course gained the curious interest of keen bystanders. Rumors were always quick to circulate, especially on a web of internet space, that was why you already expected the notifications that blew up on your phone when the information got leaked. It didn’t stress you out per se. You even found it humorous how much of a celebrity you had become overnight while Satoru was the one pacing back and forth all night, overthinking whether the attention would be extremely bad for you and your baby. You couldn’t even count the downpour of apologies that left his mouth and you had to shut him up with a kiss just to calm him down. What a cute husband and daddy.

The lovely messages from the public have been really touching. They all wished you a healthy pregnancy and offered enthusiastic words towards your baby, with even some memes about you and your husband adopting them or claiming that the baby was already richer than they would ever be. In fact, the words ‘Congratulations Mr. and Mrs. Gojou’ was the top trending topic on Twitter last night and it astounded you just how much more popular you were as a couple than it seemed.

Satoru was used to the spike of attention because he had always been a known bachelor who earned a rightful spot on the Forbes Under-30 list before he married you. What you didn’t expect was how you would also have to deal with a portion of his own fame now that you were his wife. But as long as the attention wasn’t harmful, as long as people still gave you privacy, nothing should pose a problem to you and your baby.

That essentially still didn’t manage to dispel Satoru’s fears. And here came The Deal—in his words, ‘mommy would have to come with daddy to his office so he won’t worry too much about leaving her behind’. There was nothing wrong with his request because you would be glad to come with him. What he just failed to realize was how awkward it would be for you to be around the same people who witnessed your dramatic moment at the 50th anniversary. That, and the fact that your baby was literally made in his office.

The fresh memory of you sitting on his cock—hands pressed against his office table while his fingers dug deep into your hips—was still as vivid as though it just happened yesterday. You remembered how stable his rhythm was, how he played with your nipples under your blouse, how he covered your mouth to prevent your whimpers, how he pounded through your walls roughly, and how he spilled every drop of semen straight into your cervix. Oh, Satoru. You were so full of cum that it even dripped down to your thighs until the devilish husband wiped them with tissues.

Perhaps there was no need to be graphic about that spicy recollection of sexual adventures. It was just funny to think that a quickie was what resulted into the most precious angel inside your womb.

Your bump was not at all prominent and if people looked closely, it looked like you had just eaten two quarter pounders. Because you still maintained your previous figure, you were able to wear your favorite pair of vintage Chanel together with your snakeskin Birkin and Ferragamo shoes.

As your husband pointed out, “Baby, you look like you’re gonna be walking on a fashion runway.”

“You’re one to talk, Mr. I Only Wear Zegna Suits.”

When you stepped out of the elevator to the C-Suite floor, lo and behold were the series of congratulations and the gleeful faces of the executives and their staff. You had no other words for them except to smile in gratitude as your husband held your hand while you two walked along the corridor towards his office. It was a celebration indeed because this baby was not at all ordinary. Regardless of the gender, your child would be the next heir of the Gojou Group and Creston combined. Your little bean wasn’t even aware of the immense power and status that it had and would have once it was born.

For now, mommy has to be in great health in order to deliver safely.

“I have a meeting,” announced your husband as he guided you to sit on his expensive leather couch. “I’m sorry. It’ll be quick.”

You sent him a nod, already browsing through one of the magazines on his coffee table. “I’ll be alright. I’ll wait for you.”

Gojou seemed to be having a dilemma about whether or not he should leave you alone and the way he glanced at Miwa gave you the impression that he wanted his secretary to stay with you. “Miwa, can you—”

You cut him off. “Absolutely not. Miwa has to go with you to take some notes. I’ll be fine, Satoru.”

The blue-haired girl bowed at you in return while your husband had finally given up on whatever plans he had. He probably would still ask his other employees to look after you, though. You knew him that well.

“I’ll be back before you know it.” He leaned in to meet your lips with a peck, later crouching down to be at face level with your belly. “My little bug. Protect mommy’s heart while I’m gone, okay?”

The cute scene tugged at your lips. “Go now. You’re late for your meeting.”

Gojou was still in a cold war with his father who unfairly blamed him for his Nana’s death so you could understand why your husband didn’t want to contact him firsthand to deliver the news of your pregnancy. He simply didn’t deserve to be a grandfather especially since they have serious issues at home. In business, not so much. Satoru’s father would of course want him to continue with work instead of completely neglecting his duties because his decisions gravely matter to the company. They could avoid each other in the office, but they have to put their personal feelings aside when it comes to the company.

Thankfully, though, your father-in-law was out somewhere doing field work.

You were pretty much fine to spend the next twenty minutes alone in your husband’s office. You didn’t have enough energy to walk around so you remained on the couch while looking through the magazines that took your interest until you noticed a small frame atop his oak desk that you hadn’t seen before. The clicks and clacks of your heels then filled your ears as you walked towards his office desk to see the photo on the said frame—it was your wedding photo. The same huge portrait that took a significant space in your living room. It may look like you were both happily married in that picture, but the camera failed to capture the real feelings that you two had that day—that he hated the marriage while you were heartbroken from the realization.

Your attention was quickly snatched away when you heard a notification on your phone signaling a text from a good friend of yours who was also your beloved breath of fresh air.

Toji: I can’t believe Mrs. Zen’in has a baby!

It was embarrassing how quickly you laughed.

You: How shameful of Mrs. Zen’in!

Toji: Very. I wonder if she’s taking care of her health, though.

This third-person talk was so entertaining that you didn’t notice how big your grin was.

You: Worry not, she is healthy and doted on. She’s also wondering if you can meet with her some time soon.

Toji: I would love to meet with her. Maybe she can explain this act of infidelity to me.

How could Toji make you laugh through texting alone? However, the joy in your eyes and the expanse of your beam were only fleeting when an uncomfortable presence had set foot inside your husband’s office.

“Hey.”

Sera was entering with a tray on her hand that had snacks in the form of biscuits, a teacup and a saucer. You realized that you have totally forgotten that she was still relevant to your life at all. No, seriously. You didn’t mean that in a bad way. Only that you haven’t been paying attention to the outside noise ever since you found out about your pregnancy and you nearly erased Sera’s existence from your mind.

That being said, how did Sera react to the very pregnancy that plagued every news channel? You prepared yourself for the forthcoming insults, screams, and perhaps violence that she would throw at you.

“Did someone send you here?” you asked, walking back into the couch to take your seat. She prepared tea and cranberry biscotti for the wife of the man she was head-over-heels for. Were you dreaming?

As a matter of fact, there were no traces of melancholy on her face. Her cheeks were free of tears and her face was as fresh as morning dew. You had to admit that Sera was one of the prettiest women you’ve seen in your life.

“I heard about the pregnancy…” she began. Here we go. “Congratulations.”

Did you hear that right? “Thank you,” you said. I mean, what else could you have said? Her congratulating you was already shocking in itself. What kind of self-reflection did she have since your last encounter? It was hard to believe how much her stance had changed. Maybe the news about your baby knocked some sense into her and she realized that it was futile to keep holding onto a man who had already given up on her.

“I can’t wish you well since this is hard for me to accept,” she said, holding the tray in her hand as she stood just a few meters away from the coffee table. “But I hope that you’ll take good care of Satoru.”

She deserved nothing but a nod from you. “I will.”

You at least appreciated that she lowered down her pride to talk to you calmly like this and you had high hopes that Sera still had minuscule kindness inside of her. Even more, she seemed genuinely interested in your pregnant belly with the way she was glancing at it.

“Oh, I’m not showing much yet,” you told her as you read her expression.

She displayed a small smile. “I prepared you tea since coffee is bad for pregnant women. It’s a hundred percent herbal and helps prevent anxiety. I know you need it since… the whole thing with Nana.”

“Yeah, thank you. I appreciate it.”

You grabbed the teacup and saucer, indulging yourself on the sweet aroma of the tea before sipping its sweet and somehow bitter taste. Sera then decided it was best to leave you alone without anything else to say because the air was awkward enough and you weren’t exactly willing to converse with your husband’s old flame. You were nice enough not to disclose her participation in Satoru's adultery at the start of your marriage, so she should understand that you and her could never be the best of friends.

As you placed the teacup back on the table, the door flew open again, but this time it was a six-foot tall man with albino hair and glowing blue eyes who greeted you excitedly.

“I’m back!” He spread his arms wide, ready to embrace you once you got up. “Miss me?”

You shot him a teasing grin. “Not really. You interrupted my snack time.”

“My bad. Tea time?” His eyes trailed down to the teacup on the table, quickly scrutinizing the content and even smelling the liquid inside the cup. His reaction was within the grounds of ‘normal’ until the ever-so-protective husband actually took a sip of the tea. In less than a second, the cup was on the carpeted floor and the content had spilled. You were far too frozen to react, but very much conscious to see the way Satoru’s face contorted into anger. “How much did you drink?!”

You panicked. “I-I… Just a little sip. Why?”

“Do you know how fucking dangerous that is? That’s chamomile!” he was yelling, not really towards you but to your careless decision to drink the said herbal tea. Was he overreacting? You weren’t even aware. “It’s not advisable for pregnant women. If you drank too much of that, you might have a misc—”

“But I didn’t know!” You approached your husband and reached for his hand. “I’m sorry for worrying you. I really didn’t drink a lot. Sera told me that the tea could help…” you trailed off in realization.

Gojou, too, had the same look on his face as he spoke with gritted teeth. “Sera gave that to you?”

His eyes scared you, but you recognized what brought those terrifying anger in his cold blues.

Sera just tried to kill the baby.

Was there any other way to sugarcoat it? Satoru was already stomping out of the office, hand clenched into a fist while you ran after him. Scared, nervous, befuddled—your mind was a mess. You couldn’t understand what was happening and just how shocking it all was. Even the employees looked intrigued as to why their boss was walking along the corridor with a fixed scowl that ultimately drove them away from blocking his path. No one else dared to approach him as you silently followed behind until Satoru stopped halfway to talk to one of the bodyguards near the reception.

“Call the security team, now!” he ordered in a domineering voice that made the other receptionists flinch and they all folded as soon Satoru’s piercing gaze scanned the two of them. “Where’s Sera?”

The poor girls couldn’t even look at your husband’s eyes and one of them had a quivering voice as she answered, “O-On the fax machine, Mr. Gojou.”

It was difficult to catch up to Satoru’s pace, especially when he was hellbent on confronting his ex-lover who had just tried to cause his own wife’s miscarriage. You wanted to be angry, and damn you did feel the fire burning in your head, but you had to maintain your calmness for the sake of your baby. Let Satoru deal with her and all you had to do was see what kind of excuse Sera would pull after attempting to harm your baby.

When you saw the brown-haired woman on the fax machine, guilt was clearly there on her face. She knew what she had done and she was masking her remorse with a rigid face.

“I’ve been nothing but good to you,” Gojou stood at a safe proximity away from her while he uttered his words with clenched fists. “I even let you hit me and begged you not to hurt my wife. I tried to end our relationship in the most civil way possible and this is how you… how you repay me?”

Did he really do that? You suppressed your gasp from coming out as you stayed silent behind your husband.

Sera averted her eyes. Although it was impossible to hide her trembling hands. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Mr. Gojou.”

“Hell! Don’t fucking lie to me! You know exactly what you did! You disgust me.” The emphasis in those three words that left his mouth were the same words that finally brought tears in Sera’s eyes. “I’m going to file a restraining order against you if you don’t leave my wife alone.”

“Satoru, wait n-no. It’s not what you think—” Sera tried to appeal, but the security guards had already arrived and were pulling her arms like a prisoner who had just committed a crime.

It was easy to tell that your husband felt betrayed that his ex—someone whom he once truthfully loved—would do such a thing to you. And while you were the victim in this situation, your anger had subsided into momentary pity because Sera was breaking down.

“I didn’t mean it!” she cried and begged for his understanding, heavy tears cascading down on her cheeks in such a pitiful state. “Don’t do this. Don’t.”

Without another word, Satoru protectively pulled you closer and gestured for the security team to escort her out of the office. There was no sympathy in his sadistic gaze and you knew that this was when your husband truly saw how, since the very beginning, Sera would only be the cause of his own downfall.

“Send her out of the building,” he spat, turning his back on her and pulling you by the hand as you could hear his ex-lover crying for forgiveness. “And throw her shit out of the office. She no longer works here.”

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#gojou satoru x reader #gojo x reader #gojou satoru angst #gojo angst #jjk x reader #jjk angst

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