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phebbsl · 3 months

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A Part of Your World- Chapter 1

Stardew Sebastian x GN!Reader

Summary:

Sebastian’s resolve to not meet the new farmer lasts all but two weeks. To be fair, it’s not of his own volition.

You never thought you had to resolve to not get literally sucked into your favorite game, but now here you are. And now you have a farm to manage and a pretty boy to woo.

Or: My spin on the life in Pelican Town, and Heart Events, featuring a GN!Reader (possibly/probably Isekai???).

Cross posted from my AO3, phebbsl

♡

Sebastian’s resolve to not meet the new farmer lasts all but two weeks. To be fair, it’s not of his own volition.

He had stumbled out of his bedroom in the afternoon, late afternoon mind you, and promptly walked in on you and his mom discussing options for a new coop.

It was the day after the Egg Festival. Abigail had lost the Egg hunt for the first time in years, and was inconsolable for the whole night yesterday. Not in the ‘holy shit I lost and I’m absolutely devastated’ way with tears, but in ‘holy shit, did you see the Farmer??? they’re so hot’ type of way.

The trio of friends had stayed up late at Sebastian’s room for the rest of the night, drinking and using his ‘vase’. Abigail continued to gush about the Farmer, only slightly put out that her win streak ended.

“I mean, did you see them in that little straw hat? How cute!” she cooed.

Sam joined in too, all red-faced, blushing. The Farmer had stopped by his house when they first moved in, introducing themselves sweetly, and had even tossed over a can of Joja Cola to the blonde. Sam had suspected that it had been fished up from the river, judging by scuffs and slightly musty river-y smell, but had downed it anyway (and kept the can).

Why Sam drinks treasures those little blue cans of diabetes and Yoba-knows-what when he literally works at Joja and knows damn well how unhealthy it is, Sebastian will never know.

Sebastian spent the rest of the night, totally not sulking on his bed, casting mournful glances at the game table, all set up for a round of Solarian, as he listened to his friends’ gossip about the newest member of the town.

Abigail and Sam didn’t leave until well past midnight, and while Sebastian was used to long nights hunched over his computer, the day’s festivities had worn him out completely.

Thus, leading to him crawling out of his mom’s basement like a cave-goblin, obvious to all that he had woken up past the accepted hours for any normal person, even later than he typically would’ve. Upon seeing you, he was completely determined to turn around, go back to bed, and hide enjoy his solitude until you were gone. That was, before his mother had stepped in, ever so glad to take any opportunities to socialize him.

“Have you met my son, Sebastian?” Robin prods, with a sly grin, before slinking away to leave the two of you to socialize.

Great, now he had to interact with you.

He mumbles out a greeting and his name and takes you in.

You don’t look like a farmer. At least, not the stereotypical version of he had come up in his head. To be fair, he only really envisioned a grizzled old man, smudged with dirt and hands full of calluses. Basically, your grandfather. He had only caught a brief glance at the festival yesterday, and was uninterested in looking further. Now, he realized that his friends were right.

‘Oh no, they’re hot!’ echoes in his brain, soundly strangely like Squidward.

You’re exactly his type, with pretty eyes he could just drown in to boot, your straw hat prize from yesterday perched on your head. You’d even wound a crown of flowers around the base. He’s not a big fan of flowers, but daffodils suddenly look a million times better. Yellow looks good on you, he thinks.

He urges his brain to reboot and act like a normal person. Suddenly, he wants to make a good impression on you, curse his traitorous hormones.

“Oh. You just moved in, right? Cool. Out of all the places you could live, you chose Pelican Town?”

Nice. Cool, slightly aloof, and hopefully he didn’t sound too much like a dick.

You shrug and spin off the truly humongous backpack you have strapped on.

‘Damn, Pierre found someone to sell that thing to, huh?’ he thinks absently.

He and Abigail had spent an embarrassingly long time giggling at the giant monstrosity when it had arrived at Pierre's, while the store owner wilted behind the register, his plans to sell backpacks to one-up Joja foiled.

Sebastian watches with confusion as you proceed to stick your arm in the pack, rummaging, before producing a frozen tear, then dropping it into his hands. He stares at it, flabbergasted.

“I really love this. How did you know?” He finally manages to say.

“Just had a feeling,” you shrug again.

Robin comes back, interrupting the moment.

“I found the paint swatches for the coop! Let me know which one you’d like.”

You break away to discuss color options, and Sebastain stays, silently rolling the frozen tear in between his fingers. More words of gratitude are stuck in his throat.

Eventually, you and Robin finish, the latter rolling up the blueprints with promises to start working the next day.

“It was nice to meet you,” you give a little wave with a wiggle of your fingers.

“Uh yeah, same here.”

‘Wow, real eloquent,’ Sebastian snarks internally.

He finally leaves for the kitchen to grab food to start his day.

“Are you going to Sam’s? You should change before you go,” Robin enters as well, snickering.

Sebastian looks down.

Fuck, he had just met the most attractive person he’d ever seen and he was in his damn froggie printed pajama pants.

‘I knew I should’ve just stayed in my room,’ he thinks. But, glancing at the frozen tear next to his cup of coffee, he knows he might just wake up early again the next time you visit.

♡

I’m playing with the idea of having the farmer be from our world, like an isekai, I think it opens up more possibilities and has potential to become a bigger story than just a series of one shots, but I’m still not sure yet.

Let me know what you guys think!

#sdv farmer #farmer x sebastian #gn reader #gn!reader #stardew valley #sebastian x reader #sdv sebastian #stardew sebastian x reader #sdv sebastian x farmer #sdv sebastian x reader #pheebsfics

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xenosagaepisodeone · 4 days

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For the last 2 weeks I've been transfixed on a strain of lost media I've come to call "bad memory induced media", where the supposed media in question does not (or at least more than likely does not) exist, but there are swaths of people convinced that they have definitely seen it at some point. There is rarely anything more to go off of for the hunt than a vague summary outlined in a post on some forum, but the lack of specificity allows people to fill in the blanks with similar types of media that they've seen, giving them the impression that they've already experienced it. I've found that this is extremely common for alleged lost shock media in particular, which isn't surprising. I talked a little about this on my LOL SUPERMAN post, and I get the impression that a similar strain of logic applies on a smaller scale.

Anyway, 2 major cases I have been looking at for a while are Saki Sanobashi/Go For A Punch and Evil Farm Game. Saki Sanobashi in particular fascinates me because an urban legend like this should have crumbled to the wayside by like 2018 at the latest, since that's when anime more or less became demystified to normal people. The basic premise is that it is an 80s/90s horror anime about anywhere from 4-8 girls trapped in a bathroom. The girls talk about their lives, hopes, dreams and philosophies before slowly going insane and dying one by one. If you like horror stuff you probably are already getting the vague impression that it sounds familiar- which could be influenced by any swath of media artifacts from Saw to the Russian Sleep Experiment creepypasta to the Ikea SCP to ClockUp's Euphoria to snippets of Battle Royale to that one Grisaia no Kajitsu arc. OP insisted he found it fully subbed on the deep web (omegalul) and hasn't found a trace of it since, implying some kind of murky origin or legal status (the OVA is not pornographic btw). As you can probably tell, I think this is silly. Like, so much goes into anime production that it would be difficult to hide any traces of this thing's existence. Someone had to voice act those girls. Someone had to sit hunched over a desk and draw that settei. OVAs were such a new thing in the 80s and 90s that both sfw and nsfw series were advertised in magazines. The only way that this could be so lost that not even a MAL entry remains is if it had been a student/indie production or something made for a single comiket event...but even at that....you're telling me that someone still managed to rip this from a vhs and subtitle it? And then chose to upload it to the deep web instead of youtube? even the title sounds like something google translated but didnt format correctly ("Saki Sanobashi" being gibberish while "Saki-san no Bashi" translates to "Saki-san's Bridge").

And yet there are people who will say "I definitely saw this at some point" because they saw a reaction image similar to the alleged scene where the protagonist smashes someone's head into a mirror. "The neck scratching death sounds familiar...." because you watched a higurashi amv! And OP did too, and thought it was so creepy that he involved it in his fake story. It's almost grating how much you have to suspend your disbelief to embrace that something like this exists in the exact way that stories like this insist. While many people have accepted that the series is likely not real in the last 4 or so years, there still persists a cohort of people hunting for Saki Sanobashi, likely because they are kids who are now too old to believe in Squidward's Suicide.

Evil Farm Game gives me a chuckle because it goes like this: a redditor posts to r/tipofmytongue about an old flash game where you play as a farmer who kills his wife and then has to hide her body while going about his farm tasks. The setup is completely fine and actually kind of reminiscent of a few story driven flash games I played on newgrounds as a kid. Many people came forward insisting that they had played this as well, one person even producing a link to a file from their hard drive that they couldn't open, but strongly believed that the game was there. A subreddit was even created to support the search. The twist is that it was a misremembered joke from a vinesauce stream.

Everyone knows that memory is an extremely fallable thing; people can be coaxed into believing that they did or saw things that they didn't with the correct prompts. What gets me is that a lot of people on the hunt for "bad memory induced media" seem to largely be hyping themselves up. They want to believe there is something that exists against all reason no matter what. It's chuuni in nature. Do not get me wrong- the interest in finding a cool, mysterious, haunting piece of media isn't lost on me, but dog, the dopamine hit of finding a previously lost 1985 commercial for almonds in a box of vhs tapes you got from eBay is the same.

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genshin-squabbles-and-wobbles · 9 months

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okay so this my first time request but i came by your blog and i really enjoyed your writing so — 😭

ahem, anyways i was wondering if i could have some boyfriend hcs with scaramouche and tighnari….

(heizou too if you write for him, i didn’t see him on your list but like, yeah.)

anyways ty 🤍🤍🤍

Indeed I shall, my darling. For Heizou I am still getting to know him and see how I can portray him accurately, however for you my dear. I shall test out my skills upon him and see if it is realistic or not to the character. It still needs work, but FOR YOU MY ONE AND ONLY HALF FAIRY, HALF MERMAID, HALF SQUIDWARD BELOVED. I shall. :)

Scaramouche ┍━━━━━☟━━━━━━━☟━━━━━━━┑

He is the type of boyfriend to show his affections through his actions, not his words. He would hug you, kiss you, and rub your back all while calling you an idiot or pretend to complain about it.

He cares about you very much, however, of course he won’t show it, he wants to be seen as someone who can take care of you, not as a weak man who you have to cater to.

He is very bad at communicating and would expect you to read his mind, and you guys would get into arguments about it, however, eventually he will acknowledge his wrong doings.

He has baggage, so he can be insecure and jealous when he sees you with someone who is more capable of taking care of you, then him. It's worse that they speak nicely to you, compared to him, who speaks with sharp tongue.

His love language quality time, he wants you to focus on him and only him. Put your phone away, and ignore everyone for an hour, as you watch a movie with him, or cuddle and talk to him.

They way he expresses his love to you, is through acts of favor. So he would often do favors for you, and enjoy it. - "You need me to buy milk? Alright, anything else?" - "You need help carrying these boxes? Okay, give me a moment." - "You need me to defeat this boss for you? Okay, just rest, I'll handle it." - Want me to take over cooking for the night? I know you like my mac and cheese recipe so I'll make that for you."

He doesn't really care if you guys have children or not, he definitely will struggle to have the patients with them at first, but once he finds a routine then he will be fine. However, his tongue doesn't change, so he will speak harsh to his children but lecture them but his actions will be gentle.

He would always try to find ways to make you comfortable without you knowing. - Your bed is suddenly not giving you back pain? He fixed it. Because you complained about it. - Some weird guy suddenly leaves you alone? He dealt with it. - The favorite clothes you lost, suddenly is back in your closet? He turned the whole house upside down to find it, because you were sad that you lost it.

Tighnari┍━━━━━☟━━━━━━━━━━━☟━━━━━━━┑

He will refer you to you as his "precious flower" or his "Beloved Sumeru Rose"

His tail will sway a bit when happy to see you, however he would try not to show his excitement too much, he wants to be someone that you take seriously.

He would tease you in moments, but he would often smile at you.

He would often draw you when he his thinking about you, draw you with flowers in your hair, or with clothing he thought would look nice on you.

He would often take walks with you, and night walks with him is where you guys can bond and relax.

His love language is physical touch, the more you touch him, the happiest he is. Rub his head, rub his back, rub him anywhere. Hug him, and kiss him. Hold him close to you. He enjoys it.

He would know how to comfort you during your nightmares or when you are overthinking, as he uses logic to help explain to you that these things would never happen. He never explains it on a cold hearted manner, but he explains it gently while holding your hand. However, if you are still distraught and still insisting, he would actually listen and look into it. Again, anything is possible so he has an open mind.

He would dress up for you, on dates. Wear his best Sumeru outfit, when taking you out to eat, or showing you around nice places. He would show that he has dedicating to you.

He expresses his love to you, through verbal affirmation, which will go hand in hand with physically touching you. - "You’re doing great, my love. I am so proud of you." - "What's wrong? Did he bother you? No worries love, let me handle him." - "My love, my precious love, do you know how much I love you? I know this relationship is young, but I do want to spend my entire life with you." - "Honey, don’t forget your journal for the journey, okay? In case you do, I'll have it here for you. I love you."

He would definitely want a lot of children with you, however, if you don’t want children, he wouldn’t mind. He cares a lot about you, and only you. No imaginary children will affect that. You are his life, as his species values their partners quite a lot. So your needs come before their own. As long as they have you, they are already happy.

Heizou┍━━━━━☟━━━━━━━━━━━☟━━━━━━━┑

He would tease you a lot, like a lot. He is more of a gentle teaser though, as he would tease you about your efforts for him or you blushing for him. - "Oh? Is someone blushing because I took a my shirt off? No? Hmm, a mystery I must solve later, meet me in my bed later, okay? hehe" - "Haha, you are so cute when you are focused like that. What do you mean I am embarrassing you? You are my future wife after all, I need to embarrass you.~" - "Oh? Quite a yearning hug you have on me here. Perhaps...you'd like me to show you one of my yearning hugs in return?"

He would often hug you and put his arm around your waist, not because he is possessive of you, or has jealousy, merely because his hands have a home there and it's just routined for him. Or else, he won’t know where to put his hands.

He would often kiss your hand when he wants to thank you in anyway.

He would buy you gifts as well.

You two would lay down on the bed, as he would go on and on about his toughest cases or the most scariest cases. You will see a twinkle in his eyes as he passionately talks about it.

When you guys argue, you will mostly likely always lose the argument, as he his master debater and investigator so his skills would come out, in mentioning points and factual things that would make you realize that you had your faults too. Of course, this will upset you more, and you would ignore him for a bit. And of course, he would feel bad and apologize, along with admitting he was wrong on his part too.

He would often share things with you, as it is routined for him to do that too. He has candy? Takes half and gives it to you without looking. He has cookies? Gives you one and eats one without even batting an eye.

If you cry, it breaks his heart. He would desperately try to calm you down and cheer you up. He hates seeing you in distress, he wants you to have a comfortable life, a peaceful life. Due to the cases he deals with, he wants you to live peacefully and worry free. It makes him feel happy knowing you aren’t the one dealing with the stress compared to what stress he deals with on his job as a detective.

Speaking of detective, He figures you out easily, he sees through you, your behaviors, and is very observant of you. So when you hide something, he knows. When you try to be normal, he knows. He would point it out. He knows exactly how to comfort you as well.

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heavenlyfay3 · 8 months

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Workplace grievance

By Sawyer-summary: you haven’t been doing your best at work and get a “scolding” by your bosses bosses boss the ceo Mr. O’Hara

miguel x reader

warnings:smut, p in v, dubcon, spanking, power dynamic!!

You’ve been messing up at work and by “messing up” you mean fucking up your reputation and acting as if you don’t want a job at all. you’ve been making careless mistakes, arriving late, slacking off, yesterday you even yelled at a highly valued client. it’s not like you were trying to get fired you just haven’t been in the mood to deal with anyone and that’s basically what your job is dealing with people. Today you got called to your manager’s office immediately after you sat down at your desk knowing exactly what you were in for.

“I can’t let stuff like this slide y/n we almost lost a client!” your manager yelled at you

“I know I know and I’m sorry I promise it won’t happen again,” you said pleading to keep your job

“yea well sadly for you it’s out of my hands,” he says sitting down with a tired look on his face

“What do you mean out of your hands?” you ask confused

“you have to go speak with Mr O’Hara y/n” your manager said with a sympathetic look on his face

you’d never met the CEO of the company you figured he was like a unicorn or something that only allowed you to see it when it wanted. you’d only heard rumors about him no one was dumb enough to fuck up to the point where they had to go talk to him

you were in the elevator that opened directly to his secretary’s desk and then to his office you were nervous your whole body was shaking thinking about all the things that could go wrong about how you were definitely getting fired and never getting a job again becoming homeless begging on the streets like Squidward in that episode of SpongeBob.

the elevator doors opened and you immediately felt like you were gonna throw up your breakfast you looked to his secretary for some kind of hope or reassurance and all she said was “Through the brown doors honey” With a dead grin on her face you stepped out of the elevator and walked towards the doors saying thanks to his secretary you stood in front of his doors for about a minute before finally working up the courage to knock

“Come in” you heard his voice and it sent shivers through your body you took a deep breath opened the door and walked “Mr.O’Hara?” you said in the smallest voice afraid to make too much noise

he didn’t say a word just pointed to the chair in front of his desk telling you to take a sit and you did that immediately “You understand why you’re here right?” he said in a stern voice

“yes, yes sir but I-“ he stops your words “you know yelling at that client was over the line don’t you?”

“yes, Mr. O’Hara I do I’ve just been under a lot of stress, and im so so sorry please forgive me!”

“I can do that. but punishment is due, y/n” he says looking a Your breasts through the three buttons you lefts open on your blouse“Yes I understand I'll go clear out my desk,” you say slowly getting up from your chair tears filling your eyes

“Why are you doing that?” he asked. You turned back at him confused “Come here next to me” you do as he says standing next to the chair that he sits at behind his desk anticipating his next move

He immediately pulls you over his lap by your arm you’re not even able to protest or get a word out because as soon as your torso hits his thighs he’s lifting your skirt above your ass

A look of shock crosses your face as you feel yourself being pulled across his lap and him lifting your skirt. he moves your panties between your cheeks and places his palm flat on one cheek

“or would you rather lose your job?” he asks in a time that makes you melt “No sir i-i want to keep my job,” you say not exactly prepared for whats about to happen but exited nonetheless “I thought so”

You gulp, your body shaking as you feel his hand on your bare ass cheek. you can hardly believe what's happening, but your mind is a mess and if you resisted you would lose your job and it’s not like you wanted to resist anyway.

while in your thoughts he slapped your ass hard. Your body jolts on his lap the feeling sending a heat radiating through your body to your surprise a loud gasp more like a moan left your mouth.

“This is what happens when you don’t do you job” he says slapping your ass again on the same cheek “you think girls that do their jobs correctly get punished like this?” he says slapping it again “n-no sir” the slaps hit harder and harder each time sending heat to your core making you soaking wet you let out moans you never even knew you could make.

He gives your ass another slap before looking down at your wet cunt “Are you wet right now, love?” embarrassed by the mess you made of yourself you stay silent hoping he’ll just ignore it.

He slaps your ass again and you let out a soft moan again his fingers start touching your wet pussy and he pushes your soaked panties to the side revealing the puffy lips of your pussy begging to be fucked. You let out a surprised gasp When he does this your breath shallows and your heart starts raising

he pushes his middle finger in your hole and uses his other hand to slap your ass again “Don’t pretend you don’t like it, baby” he says with a sly grin on his face looking down at you. Your body tenses at this new feeling of his finger inside you

He adds another finger and starts pumping them in and out of you at a slow pace teasing and antagonizing you and making you squirm in frustration “You’re being such a good girl for me now Why couldn’t you do that before huh?” his words alone do something to you making you feel butterflies in your stomach. You cover your mouth to try and suppress the filthy moans coming from your mouth

He takes both fingers out and starts slapping your pussy lightly your moans only start to get louder as your entire body starts shaking as you feel a wave of pleasure building up inside you. Your eyes are glistening with excitement and pleasure. your breathing coming in gasps as you try to fight back the urge to beg for more “oh god…please”

“Stand up and bend over my desk baby” he says taking both hands away from your body as soon as he tells you what to do you stand up and bend over his desk. He stands up behind you and presses his bulge into you so you can feel how hard his huge cock is “ See what you do to me?”

A small moan leaves your mouth as you feel him pressing into your swollen lips. You feel a cool breeze and hear him unbuckle the belt of his pants and just as you hear that his hard cock is pressing into your hole. “Fuuuck your tight” you can barely think, your entire world reduced to the sensation of his thick member invading your tight pussy. You can feel every inch of him as it slides in and out of you, your body shuddering uncontrollably as the wave of pleasure grows stronger.

He sucks air through his teeth and sighs right after from how good you feel “God i might give you a promotion for this pussy!”

you try to hold back your slutty moans, but it’s difficult to contain your excitement as you feel his hard cock sliding back and forth inside you. You gasp loudly as another wave of intense pleasure rolls through you, your whole body shaking as you feel yourself getting close to climaxing.

He starts fucking you hard into his desk pushing you against it “yea that’s right baby cum on my cock” he says groaning with each thrust

At this point, you can't suppress the slutty moans coming from your mouth as your body starts to tremble your hands clutching at the edge of his desk as you begin to lose control. The feeling of being filled by his cock pushes you over the edge as you scream out loud “Fuck, Mr.O’Hara!” your juices gushing out around his cock as you cum

“Fuck baby good job!” he doesn’t let up after you cum fucking you even harder you try to catch your breath as you feel him fucking you even harder, his cock slamming into your sensitive flesh over and over again. You can barely hold onto the edge of his desk as you try to keep up with his pace, your legs shaking uncontrollably as the pleasure grows stronger.

He cums inside you as he grips your hips digging his thumbs into your back and his thrusts become slow and deep hitting all the right spots “Oh my god that’s so good!”

your eyes roll back in your head as you moan loudly, your pussy tightening down on his shaft as you orgasm once more. your body shaking wildly as you cum again, your juices spill all over his desk and you struggle to stay conscious.

“Shit baby!” he says slapping your ass one last time you pants heavily, your body limp as you try to catch your breath. you feel a slight pain in your ass as he slaps you one last time, but you can’t help but smile as you think about how good that just felt. you turn and lie on your back to look up at him, your eyes filled with lust as you reach down to touch your sore cum-filled pussy

“Who said you could touch your pussy?” He says grabbing your face and pulling you up so you can lean back on your hands “Sorry sir” you say looking up at him with lust filled eyes telling him you want more

“Tell me what you want y/n,”

a/n:Ending it here cuz i don’t want it to be too long and i might do a part 2 if it doesn’t flop

#miguel x reader #miguel o'hara #miguel x you #miguel smut #miguel x y/n #atsv miguel #miguel spiderman #miguel spiderverse #smut #fanfic #miguel o’hara x y/n #spiderman #spank my bum #black reader #workplace #migue #power dynamics #black tumblr

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karmawonders · 2 years

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Congrats on 800 followers!!!

Ever since I learned about SAGAU, I have been nervous to play music (idk why though??) But I listen to people like Cupcakke and Ayesha and now I'm wondering what the acolytes' reactions would be to the creator playing weird music ^^

🌸Thank you, thank you!🌸

Ahh, I do enjoy myself some good Cupcakke and Ayesha. I got both of em on my playlist, haha! I listen to some pretty out there music as well, if hyper-pop counts as weird. Who knows~ Anyway somehow this became Consort!Diluc and I apologize, my brain went running with this ask and it became.. this.

Warnings: Sexual Content. Cult and Self Aware AU. Somewhat Yandere.

Contents: This could be considered a crackpost at some points. Includes the song squidwards nose / commentary from because I bop to it, aight? . There is mention of "holy dildo." Forgive me i thought it was funny. Diluc is completely devoted to you(he wants to be your consort) and is suddenly worried about his dick size. Not beta read we die like rex-lapis.

Anyway!

I imagine it would be a normal day like any other in Mondstadt. The city is bustling, Flora giving people cute little flower crowns to promote her flower shop, bards singing about various topics and styles, Knights of Favonius helping people find lost cats, etc etc.

In the middle of the town square, stands your current puppets (thats what I call the"vessles" in my au) , in this case the traveller. I imagine depending on the emotional connection/friendship level you have to each of your puppets, people can sometimes hear you through them. Like a walking speaker or smth.

Since the twins don't got a friendship level, its just the equivalent of maxed out. They're crafting up some condensed resin for you, since you were AFK and they knew you were going to do so anyway. They were doing their best to ignore the loud music that they are emitting whilst doing so, Timaeus and others looking at them with wide eyes.

It isn't often your non-puppets hear obvious signs of the creator themselves, ya know! Literally everyone likes listening to you, whether it's Lofi music, rock, pop, or your voice itself!

Whenever they hear your voice from one of your more connected puppets, everyone is just filled with bubbles of happiness and excitement. Like! yay! I am directly in the High Gods presence! Sorta! Not really but its stilly exciting!

This time though, its a bit more of a "Ayo what the fuck?" sort of feeling instead of the usual.

Loudly blaring from their beings, was Cupcakke, and the iconic song "Squidward Nose".

Jean? Red faced, making sure no children are in the area, hands covering her face as she does her best, and fails, to think on who "dora the explorer" is, instead thinking about her god wanting a dick apparently as large as "squidwards nose". She has the church and the sisters notate this in a book. Might be some form of holy dildo or something, who knows.

Lisa is laughing her ass off the entire time, patting her on the back as she helps annotate notable things in the song with a few of the sisters from the Cathedral. Gotta keep their holy bible updated, afterall. She is tempted to write a new thesis for the scholars at Sumeru just for kicks and giggles about how their High God could potentially be more human than formerly assumed. She has a great new evidence, after all~ then again, the scholars at Sumeru are batshit crazy, so many not.

Venti is right at the travellers side, committing the song to his memory the best he can. Definitely getting in the way of them actually crafting the Resin, much to the twin's annoyance. He is always at whoevers side when you are playing any type of music, the music is completely new to him after all. You can bet he will be doing his best to sing the song at any late night tavern performances, even if he isn't getting all the references outside the obvious sexual stuff. Its an instant hit at Angels share, not just because Venti is singing it, but because the High God apparently likes the song as well. Also because its a great song.

Speaking of Angels Share, Diluc's face, is obviously, also as red as tomato when he hears Venti reciting the song later. He enjoys very much being a puppet, and he is definitely incredibly devoted to the High God. (aka you). He has to be devoted if he wants to fully commit himself to you, and possibly be your consort if you come down to Teyvat one day! This entire situation is completely uncouth, much to his dismay. He thinks its ruining your image before he realizes it is simply expanding it. Also, he is very upset. He is packing down there, definitely. But now he is self conscious because what if squidwards nose is better? He should honestly really kick out Venti, even is he is an Archon. Its getting in the way of his business.

Kaeya and Rosaria know about Diluc's somewhat obsessive worship and desire to be your consort, and they also know exactly why thats he is so red faced and upset and Venti's song. And because they absolutely enjoy it, they keep on giving Venti bottles of alcohol for encores of the song. And more, and more. Until Diluc has to excuse himself and leave. They are laughing the entire fuckin time. They always enjoy listening to your music whenever its playing, and they definitely agree that you should play similar songs more often. Its incredibly amusing.

🌸

Anywho's, that was fun to write! I do not know why Diluc was on the mind, but to be honest, I simp for the man highkey soooo-

Hope that was all alright for you dear Anon, and I hope you have a good day!

🌸Want to support me? Here is my Ko-fi and Masterlist!🌸

#genshin impact cult au #genshin self aware #genshin cult au #self aware genshin impact #sagau #genshin sagau brain #genshin sagau #sagau brainrot #follower event #self aware genshin #cult au #Consort!diluc #diluc x reader #genshin sagau cult #genshin impact #genshin impact au #genshin impact x reader #genshin sagau brainrot #sagau crack

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incorrect-hs-quotes · 1 year

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Dave: as someone around for 9-11 and the “NEVER FORGET NUMBER #1 GREATEST TRAGEDY EVER IN HISTURY” response to it i am in thrilled and invigorated by the fact that younger people just make amogus memes and tikiok nonsense about it. a huge chunk of america cared more about it than any entire genocide and thought you would cry learning about it. they hoped it’d make every generation patriotically angry forever and ever and want to join the military. instead you photoshop the towers into squidwards house and shit. never stop lol

Karkat: I’M PHYSICALLY UNABLE TO TAKE 9/11 SERIOUSLY, ENTIRELY BECAUSE MY GRADE 9 ENGLISH TEACHER WAS BIZARRELY OBSESSED WITH IT. WE BASICALLY HAD AN ENTIRE UNIT ON 9/11. WE WATCHED THAT DOCUMENTARY FROM THOSE STUDENTS THAT WERE DOING A DOCUMENTARY OF FIREFIGHTERS AND WOUND UP GETTING THE ONLY FOOTAGE OF THE FIRST PLANE HITTING. WE DID A NOVEL STUDY OF A BOOK ABOUT SOME KID BEING IN ONE OF THE TOWERS FOR TAKE YOUR KID TO WORK DAY AND HIM AND HIS DAD SQUEEZING PAST THE WRECKAGE OF THE PLANE TO ESCAPE IN TIME. WE WATCHED THAT NIC CAGE MOVIE OF HIM BEING A FIREFIGHTER DURING 9/11 THAT GETS STUCK IN AN ELEVATOR SHAFT WHEN THE PLACE COLLAPSES. I AM DEAD FUCKING SERIOUS, WE HAD TO MAKE UP FICTIONAL PEOPLE THAT DIED IN THE ATTACK, WRITE AN OBITUARY FOR OUR 9/11SONA’S, AND THEN WRITE AND DELIVER A EULOGY AS THEIR GRIEF-STRICKEN PARENT. AT ONE POINT IN THE UNIT THE TEACHER CLARIFIED THAT SHE HADN’T PERSONALLY LOST ANYONE TO THE ATTACK, NOR WAS SHE ANYWHERE NEAR NEW YORK WHEN IT HAPPENED. SHE NEVER BOTHERED TO ASK IF ANY OF US HAD ACTUALLY LOST SOMEONE IN THE ATTACK, WHICH KIND OF SEEMS LIKE A THING YOU SHOULD DO BEFORE MAKING US INVENT FICTIONAL VICTIMS TO GIVE EULOGIES FOR. THE UNIT BEGAN WITH HER DEMANDING TO KNOW WHERE WE ALL WERE ON THE DAY OF THE ATTACK AND WHAT WE REMEMBERED, AND SHE STARTED CRYING WHEN WE TOLD HER THAT 1. WE WERE TWO YEARS OLD AT THE TIME AND COULDN’T REMEMBER SHIT FUCK, THE CLOSEST THING WAS ONE OF THE OLDER KIDS KIND OF THOUGHT THEY REMEMBERED BEING VERY CONFUSED AT ADULTS FREAKING OUT OVER THE TV BUT THAT COULD HAVE BEEN LITERALLY ANYTHING, AND SO THIS MEANT THAT 2. WE WERE THE LAST CLASS SHE WOULD EVER TEACH THAT COULD POSSIBLY REMEMBER 9/11. PROBABLY DIDN’T HELP THAT SOMEONE POINTED OUT THAT WE WERE THE CLASS BORN IN 1999, SO IN TWO YEARS SHE’D HAVE STUDENTS THAT HADN’T EVEN BEEN BORN DURING 9/11. THAT MAY HAVE CONTRIBUTED TO THE TEACHER CRYING OVER THE WHOLE THING.

Karkat: WE’RE ALTERNIAN.

#submission #homestuck #incorrect homestuck quotes #dave strider #karkat vantas #mod terezi #imperialism is hone hell of a drug and it's one i'm glad to see people getting out of their system

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felixcloud6288 · 2 months

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Episode of Spongebob Squarepants where Mr Krabs decides to stop selling Krabby Patties and instead starts selling patties where each one is completely unique and will only be sold once. He calls them NFPs (non-fungible patties).

At first, the NFPs are very simple condiment combinations. One NFP has only ketchup; one has mustard; one has both; etc. Then when Krabs runs out of unique basic condiment combinations, he starts using different types of cheese and buns. Then he has to start using bizarre ingredients. And eventually he starts adding items into the sandwiches that make them highly toxic and dangerous.

The people of Bikini Bottom start collecting these NFPs which drives up their value and lets Mr Krabs sell his new NFPs at exceedingly bloated prices.

The only people not in on the hype are Spongebob (He's just making the patties and doesn't really notice), Squidward (He thinks the whole thing is stupid), Plankton (Refuses to buy into it and is instead trying to push ChumCoins), and Patrick (He just wants to eat a Krabby Patty but people keep buying them all before he gets a chance).

Eventually, the value of the NFPs plummets as they all start to rot and decay. Everyone stops buying NFPs when they realize they bought worthless commodities that will go bad after several days.

At this point, Patrick finally manages to buy a Krabby Patty, a plain patty with extra mayonnaise, and he eats it. Everyone sees Patrick eating his Krabby Patty and start talking about what sorts of toppings they'd rather have.

Mr Krabs, having lost everything trying to make more NFPs to sell, starts selling Fungible Patties (FPs) that are like NFPs but they aren't strictly unique and you can get any FP you want even if someone else already has the same one.

The episode ends with everything back to business as normal except people are ordering FPs instead of Krabby Patties. The last scene is someone trying to buy an FP with ChumCoin.

#original post #spongebob squarepants

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jiangwanyinscatmom · 9 months

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I saw your post about "feel free to vent" and god, I don’t even think that I love that pathetic guyfailure in your way, but I follow you and read your posts, because they bring me joy (although I don’t always agree with everything you say) and you’re one of the few people who’s willing to talk about how unhinged, pathetic and entirely deranged jiang zongzhu is. I’m so fucking tired of jc fandom, the way they turned him into something entirely unrecognisable from his canon self, turned him into weepy little bitch with gaping hole for every single "gege" on the block to fuck.

They make me genuinely hate him. I see that oc!jc committing identity fraud and I hate him. I hate him so much. My only content in this fandom is the novel, it’s the only thing that provides me with content. How fucking delightful he is there? I don’t fucking get. Jc stans say you’re a fucking jc anti or whatever the fuck, but no one actually hates jc more than his fucking stans do. the fucking torture of watching your fave being flandarised. their fucking omegaverse rotten brains yelling and crying about his tiny waist and childbearing thighs. Have you seen the art of him? What kind of caricature they turn him into? Fucking twink that will be blown away by the wind and his "geges" that will catch him midair and fuck everliving fuck out of him because uwu he did nothing wrong, he’s innocent, he’s little precious baby boy meowmeow tsundere. They yell so hard about how misunderstood he is, but they’re the ones misunderstanding his character most. They have no respect for canon material. Most of them haven’t read the fucking novel because they HaTe wAnGxIAn sO mUcH, they pick up disgusting fanon bullshit and run with it claiming it somehow to be canon.

Canon!jc would fucking rip that oc!jc in tiny little shreds, torture him violently and vomit on his corpse.

what have they turned his relationship with jin ling into? what are they fucking doing to that precious golden brat? why no one fucking enjoys their canon relationship that don’t lack complexity and depth. Why do they turn him into weird kid obsessed with his uncle? who has no life outside his uncle, who fights "jiujiu stealers" like it’s his full time job??? Jin ling is his own character, he’s going through so much, his fucking family is insane, he’s dealing with bullying, he’s working his ass off to impress his uncle who put high expectations on him.

what they turn "geges" into? they come and yell how lwj has no personality, that he’s just a "top" but then they do exactly the same shit with other characters? they’re genuinely making me hate lxc. I despise xicheng with burning fucking passion. I’m in a ooc competition, and xicheng stans are my opponents *insert squidward here*

chengxian makes my fucking blood boil because THATS ONE WAY TO ENTIRELY MISUNDERSTAND BOTH OF THEIR CHARACTERS AND TURN COMPELLING "BROTHER" CONFLICT INTO THE MOST BORING FUCKING SHIT THAT THE EARTH HAS WITNESSED. they way they just go OMG WWX LOVED JC SOOOOOO MUCH LWJ HATES JC BECAUSE HE KNOWS WWX LOVES HIM MORE THAN ANYTHING, HIS SACRIFICE IS AN ACT OF LOVE, HE LOVED HIM, HE DID IT OUT OF LOVE. why would they entirely erase wwx’s character development like that? wwx’s entire fucking arc is about learning to see his self worth, learning that the life he had at lotus pier wasn’t it, FUCKING HELL yllz literally was comforting himself with thoughts of never meeting the jiangs. My guy literally was lying there unable to sleep and was thinking about how running away from dogs and being a beggar is infinitely better than the jiangs. It’s literally in the fucking book. I don’t fucking GET IT.

I remember one time mentioning that of fucking COURSE, the manhua would erase the "golden core reveal" as in how jc lost it, because ultimately wangxian is the most important part of the story and jc is some guy wwx finally gets rid of in order to digest his traumas in a safer space and find happiness elsewhere because clearly he wasn’t happy at lotus pier. and they fucking??? came up with an AU???? as a response to me????? where wwx comes back to lotus pier because HE LOVES JC MORE THAN ANYTHING WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO very good argument, very nice talk.

I’m so fucking sick and tired, I muted jc’s name and tag on twitter and here even though I genuinely like the guy. It pains me. It causes me fucking brain damage. I want to enjoy my fandom experience, I want to be able to talk about this dudenobody and have fun. I so hate being here, I want to be free.

I’m so sorry to vent like that. 😭

I will use this as a general jump start of fandom griping regarding this entire debacle since this, this right here, should not be a normal thing that fandom has to send anonymously due to being scared of the vitriolic backlash received.

I have been nice, I have been sarcastic, I have been a troll, and despite my initial kindness and patience when I first started interacting with this fandom, I was met with consistent death threats and homophobia about a fictional male character and why I am less then patient now for Jiang Cheng stans. Other people should not HAVE to apologize for not enjoying a completely made up fandom persona and getting bit at for this. By all means go ahead and enjoy a fanon persona, by all means ask for supporting evidence when someone is arguing they do not like a character.

I interact with other Jiang Cheng fans just fine outside of this, they are not the ones I speak of in this. The ones I am addressing are the vitriolic ones that are angry about anything close to being taken as "anti" regarding an in story antagonist that does exhibit antagonistic behavior time and again with leading text and citations. It doesn't matter if he is someone that is enjoyed, somehow it's "wrong".

And hey. I DO disagree on several different interpretations in this fandom, but NONE of them have ever garnered the hate I have gotten in my 3 years in this fandom the way I chose to discuss Jiang Cheng. When told to use another tag, it was done, but again it was done incorrectly, when I stopped using anti at the behest of other fans, I did because hey, it was able to reach a wider audience, that did enjoy the character himself and wanted deeper understanding outside of fanon only that pervaded the tag meant for "Jiang Cheng".

I certainly do not deny his instances of kindness, but how dare I ascertain that all if this in context is not a reflection of positivity for him within the plot he is meant for, no matter time and again saying he has an opening for himself to do better in the future for others that have yet to be hurt by him, or are willing to salvage what they still have.

I should not have to be told I just want to fuck a dude as a "joke" and a comeback because of how I go and point out what he's like in the work. That is casual homophobia and shockingly sexual harassment. Or be told to think of it as a sibling who uses drugs and it's therefore alright to demean said character, or deny the blatant abuse this character exhibits or uses because he also had been abused by an adult.

I do not need to be tolerant of a side of fandom due to all the above treatment and others deal with.

#mdzs #mo dao zu shi #lol fandom #oh fandom

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willowisapillow · 7 months

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🧽 A Stupid Child’s Play AU I Came Up With 🧽

I usually don’t make AU’s, but this is an idea I had in mind 2 months ago back in August. I was re-watching the very first Child’s Play movie from 1988 and watched a few YouTube analysis videos of some of the characters, and some videos about the lore of the franchise, and an idea suddenly popped up in my mind while watching them…

“What if Chucky wasn’t a sociopathic serial killer trapped in a doll’s body?”

I was also heavily inspired by that one piece of Friday the 13th fanart where Jason is depicted as a fellow camp counselor at Camp Crystal Lake instead of the iconic slasher we all know and love. I thought it was super adorable and wholesome, and thought I could do the same for the Child’s Play series.

I haven’t exactly thought of why Chucky would still be sentient if he wasn’t possessed by anybody, but imma just say for now that voodoo magic happened lol

So while in my AU Chucky doesn’t murder anyone, he’s still an asshole, because, let’s be real, this wouldn’t be Chucky if he wasn’t a jerk 💀

He still lives with the Barclays, and the things that happen in my AU are basically kind of similar to that of a slice-of-life show, or a sitcom. It mostly consists of Chucky pissing off and bothering Andy’s mom, Karen (though she gets her payback in the end most of the time), coercing Andy into doing outlandish and wild stuff, or just them hanging out and bein’ buddies. Yup, unlike the movies, these two are actually friends till the end…well, at least to Andy. Chucky still sees the kid as a nuisance.

Their friendship in my AU is a Spongebob and Squidward-type dynamic, Andy enjoys hanging out with ol’ Chuck and doing fun things with him such as playing video games, or even sneaking him into school sometimes, much to his chagrin. Chucky somewhat cares for him deep down, but he won’t say it to his face, because, again, this is Chucky we’re talking about lol

In a nutshell, my whole AU is just about a young boy and his magical talking foul-mouthed doll going on wacky adventures and doing funni shenanigans together.

Fun for the whole family, coming soon to a theatre near you/j

Jk, but if there was a movie or TV show where Chucky and Andy were friends, I would definitely watch it :>

For the context of this image, Chucky made a bet with Andy on who can score the highest points in a video game, and whoever lost would be on dish duty for a whole week. Chucky came close to winning, but it was obvious that Andy had the upper hand, and now Chucky became the dish dog (or in this case, doll lmao) for the entire week. But don’t worry, he’ll get him back somehow.

🧽 🍽 🧼

#chucky #childs play #childs play franchise #chucky the killer doll #chucky movies #chucky fanart #slasher fanart #slasher movie #horror villain #AU #alternate universe #alternative universe #spooktober #childs play fanart

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da-mous · 8 months

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on tonight's episode of spongebob squarepants: squidward gets lost in the library of babel. will he be able to find his way out before it's too late for him? find out tonight on spongebob squarepants

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crabbyapplesworld · 2 months

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I want to talk about my favorite SpongeBob episode EVER… Atlantis Squarepantis!!

Spoilers for the episode

Atlantis Squarepantis is my favorite episode mostly because of the music, SpongeBob, Patrick, Plankton, Sandy, Squidward and Mr Krabs all sing throughout the episode and the songs are my favorite SpongeBob songs of all time. The episode follows them as they go to the lost city of Atlantis and take a tour around Atlantis, and throughout the episode each character finds a room with their interests and leaves the main group. Mr Krabs spends his time in a room full of money and gold, Squidward leaves to a room filled with art and artists, Sandy leaves to a room with scientific equipment and Plankton (who they didnt know came along) finds the weapons of Atlantis. SpongeBob and Patrick want to take a picture with the bubble that never pops, and they sing a couple songs about it.

I always liked the episodes where they went outside of bikini bottom or to new areas like Rock Bottom and Atlantis was such a cool and unique place in the SpongeBob world. Not to mention we get great songs with characters that I feel dont sing much, or when they do it’s part of a song with other characters. MR KRABS GETS HIS OWN SONG!!! And it’s so good. I also really enjoyed Squidwards song as he makes art puns and I rlly enjoy art.

My favorite song in the episode though is the final song that they sing when leaving Atlantis, where SpongeBob is the only happy one to leave and the others all sing about how they will miss Atlantis, but SpongeBob continues to bring up all the good things about Bikini Bottom and how much he loves his home. It’s funny but it’s also very sweet. Even though SpongeBob enjoyed Atlantis he still was glad to come back to Bikini Bottom!!

The song is called Goodbye Atlantis btw, also idk why but you cannot find the songs on Spotify ):

#spongebob #mr krabs #plankton #patrick star #squidward #sandy cheeks #atlantis squarepantis #spongebob squarepants

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