#guess whose off the hiatus!

[thegremlingirl]

Down On Your Luck (A Modern Little Thieves AU) Chapter 4

In which… our leads celebrate Halloween.

Read Chapter IV - The Masks We Wear: here

First Chapter and Summary Link: here

#*slowly edges into frame* ...hey guy #guess whose off the hiatus! #lets all pretend its october to justify this random halloween episode #a little wholesome #a little angsty #next update will NOT take an entire calendar year to upload i SWEAR #little thieves #ao3 fanfic #modern au

[xomakara]

Only One For Me

SUMMARY | Hanging out with your friends at the hottest club in Chicago, you never expect to see Johnny after you had left the idol life, your friends and him after a scandal. Johnny says he misses you and shows you how much he really does miss you. PAIRINGS | Johnny/Fem!Reader GENRE | friends to lovers, smut, unprotected sex, fingering, dirty talk, angst, drama, fluff(?) towards the end. RATING | Mature LENGTH | 11,413 words AUTHOR'S NOTE | This was supposed to be short but I guess it turned out longer than I expected LOL. Once my fingers are on a roll, anything is possible haha. Anything in italics is spoken in Korean. Enjoy lol

Your music is not cut out for it. Who's gonna listen to that shit?

You shook those words from your mind as you tried to focus on what was happening in front of you. The lights were dimmed, there was pumped up music, countless sweaty bodies out on the dance floor, drunks making moves on men and women. It was hard not to focus on anything else but the music that the club was playing was horrible.

Who listened to this crap anymore?

You obviously didn’t.

“Ouu~ this song is my jam!” The dark-skinned girl next to you yelled out, wiggling in your seat. Tori was one of your best friends since high school and was notorious for being a party girl. Even at the age of twenty-eight, all she did was go to clubs, bars, and lounges.

And you blamed her for dragging you there.

“Everything is your jam, Tori!” Another woman, whose blond waves bounced about, yelled back. Becca was your other best friend from high school and was still the smartest person you knew. Since you left for Seoul a few years back, Becca was a successful business owner with a tendency to party nowadays. Tori was most likely rubbing off on her.

“Uh huh, but you’re dancing too!” Tori yelled right back. Both women wiggled in their seats, drinks in one hand.

You never really liked the club scene. You were much more reserved and preferred to be in a bar or lounge, where they tended to play better music and have less sweaty bodies. Those were the places where you got most of the inspiration for writing your own music. You were feeling a bit out of your element here.

“Come on, Y/N. Loosen up and let's get partying.” Becca danced in her seat next to you.

“No thanks.” You shook your head, swirling the alcoholic concoction in your hand with the stirrer. “I feel out of my comfort zone here.”

“Girl, don’t they party in Korea?” Becca asked, taking a sip of whatever drink she ordered, nodding her head to the music.

You shrugged. There were parties in Seoul but you were so busy working that you never had the time to go and party. Your days were packed with dance practices, song rehearsals, variety shows, music programs. It was hard being an idol.

Correction... 

An ex-idol.

You used to be a member of a now popular girl group but left due to differences in music and joined another company. The group you were in, tended to go for the cute songs and concepts but because you were the oldest of the group, you wanted to try something new. Something sexy or mature. But the company and the other girls didn't like it. ‘We would lose our public appeal’, they said.

Another reason why you left, certain sources claimed, was the scandal with a very popular male idol with a huge fanbase. Well… that was how the media portrayed it. But there was some truth to the news.

Glad you’re out of the group. We don’t need a whore like you ruining our reputation. You really thought a girl like you could really be with a top idol like him? Dream on, Y/N.

You shook your head, clearing your mind of those bad memories. In the wake of your scandal, you asked your new company if you could take a leave of absence or go on an indefinite hiatus. They gave you permission, halting what little schedules you had. You cut all your ties to any idol friends and boarded the next available plane to come back to the States. 

And here you were. 

Back home with family and friends.

A place you could truly feel at home.

“I was so busy working that I didn’t have time to party or even go out for drinks.” You replied, taking a sip of your alcoholic beverage. “I feel like I’ve forgotten how to party.”

Tori placed her now empty glass on the table and reached forward to link arms with you and Becca. “Well, come on girl! You’re back home and away from all that negativity! So let’s just have fun and dance!”

She had a point. You were away from all that negativity. All those bad vibes. You had a chance to be free.

The music in this joint still sucked though.

Tori led Becca and you to a clearing in the middle of the dance floor. Back during your high school and college days, you were considered a horrible dancer that lacked confidence but you guess those dance training lessons paid off. You still weren't an amazing dancer like other Korean idols but you could still hold your own. Plus, the alcohol flowing through your body made you feel free and relaxed. Swaying your hips and occasionally doing some body rolls seemed to attract some attention towards your way. You were suddenly feeling the hype and despite the bad music, your body wouldn’t stop moving. You really couldn’t believe that you forgot how to have fun.

“Ouuu~what song is this?” Tori asked excitedly as the beat and tempo of the music changed.

“Are they performing this song live or something?” Becca asked from in front of you.

It wasn't typical club music. That quickly died down to be replaced with the sounds of a live band playing. Different yet familiar to your ears.  The powerful drums, the rhythmic strumming of the guitars and bass, the beautiful melody coming from the keyboard. All sounds that were too familiar.

It couldn’t be, could it?

You shook your head and didn’t even bother to turn around to see who was playing. Chicago always had some new talent out in the streets and it wasn’t uncommon for aspiring singers to be playing a gig.

“I think it’s Korean.” You heard Becca call out.

“How do you know?” Tori asked her.

“I listen to enough K-Pop to know what Korean sounds like.” Becca stated matter of factly. Which was true since she showed you her extensive playlist of popular groups like Stray Kids, Got7, Infinite, etc. “I've never heard of these guys before though. But then again, their music isn’t really my style.”

“You sure it’s in Korean? Sounds like English to me.” Tori softly swayed to the music, joining the crowd that was enraptured by the live band playing and singers singing. “So this is what the bartender meant when he said that there was going to be live playing and singing later.”

“We'll take the highway to heaven And I can't wait to love you all alone (Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, oh yeah, yeah) We'll take the highway to heaven On the 101, let's see just where it goes (Oh yeah yeah yeah yeah, oh yeah yeah)” 

Wait… what? Why did you know this song? And why does it sound like he’s here? It has to be a joke right? You shook your head and pushed the thought to the back of your mind. You were probably going crazy getting cooped up in your room all the time.

“Last call, are you coming with me? I got some things you want to see Tell all your friends that you're busy, they know They know we got the chemistry Love how your body feels on me When you get back, let me get that”

But why did those lyrics sound so damn familiar? You just couldn’t put your mind on it. You were going crazy, weren’t you? Yeah that had to be it.

“Baby you should know, I won't let you go I'll show you the world if you say so Oh, she's so bad (So bad) I'll make it last And baby, I can't leave you alone”

“Why does this song sound so familiar?” You muttered mostly to yourself but Becca heard.

“You know this song?” She asked, clearly feeling the music as she grooved to the pop song.

You shrugged, still a bit confused. This was clearly a Korean song but why is it sung in English? “Kind of. I mean it’s originally in Korean. Are they doing English covers of Korean songs?”

Becca shook her head. “The bartender said that it was a group of Korean men that was going to perform though. Maybe it’s an English version?”

Can’t be… Could it? The boys surely couldn’t be here… You doubt their company would send them to a venue like this. They would normally play in bigger venues.

“Damn, they’re good.” Tori muttered from next to you. She gave you a small smile and nodded to the stage, all the while swaying along to the song. “Do you know them by any chance?”

You sighed. You guess you could turn around and indulge your friends. You turned and it felt like your world ended.

Of all places...why here? Why at this time and place?

They danced as great as they always did. They sang with passion as they always did. They looked even more emotional than usual and when he turned his head towards your way while singing his lines, he caught your eyes. He didn’t falter even once as he locked his eyes on you. He continued dancing, those mesmerizing eyes piercing through your very soul. That sweet, velvety voice singing into the microphone, the sound of it ringing through your head.

God, you missed him.

You missed his voice, his face, the way his long fingers would push back his hair from his face. You missed his laughter, his smile, his eyes. You missed everything about him.

You turned back to Becca and Tori and took a deep breath. “I need some fresh air.”

They didn’t stop you as they continued to feel the music. You made your way towards the bar and asked for some water to hydrate your now dry throat. What will you say when they find you? What do you say when he talks to you? You shook your head and finished your water not noticing that the group finished their set and was replaced by another live band performing.

You turned to head towards the door to get a breather when you bumped into someone, spilling his drink all over the counter. “Oops! I’m so sorry!”

He turned to you and you saw that he was an Asian man of about five feet eleven inches and he seemed to have an air of sophistication on him. He raised his eyebrows when he saw you, his mouth opened slightly to speak.

Shit. Why Jeffrey of all people?

“It’s you! What are you doing here?” He asked in rapid Korean. “Do you know how much everyone has been asking about you?”

Oh no. What do you say?

“Hyung, there you are.” Another man approached him, his voice carefree and lighthearted. He looked at Jeffrey’s stunned face and then turned to you, his eyes going wide. “Oh! Noona! You were here all along?!”

Full Sun...

Fuck. You knew it. Once you saw one of them, you’ll end up seeing the rest of the guys. You turned away from them, leaving them stunned and a sputtering mess. “Sorry, I don’t know you!”

You pushed your way through the small crowd that gathered by the back door and went to an empty clearing. You needed to catch your breath. It’s been a year since you had seen anyone from the industry so why were they here of all places? Did they have a gig here somewhere in Chicago and decided to let loose or something?

You weren't paying attention as you bumped into something, rather someone, again. What the hell was wrong with you today? You were losing it. You had to be losing it. Seeing the group made you lose composure. 

Yeah, that was it.

“You okay?” A voice said from above you. That voice. That smooth velvety voice.

Johnny.

You couldn’t hide so you looked up at him with uncertainty in your eyes. “I’m fine... It’s been awhile, hasn’t it?”

A soft chuckle. “Yeah it’s been a year. How have you been, Y/N?”

Breathe in and out, Y/N. In and out. “It’s been dandy. Just living life one step at a time. How have you and the boys been, Johnny?”

A smile and the sound of his clothes shuffling about. From the corner of your eyes, you saw him lift his hand but placed it back at his side. “Oh, you know. The usual. Making new music, performing with the guys.”

“So why are you guys here? Randomly partying?” You asked out of curiosity.

He nodded, slicking his hair back. “Yeah. You? I couldn’t help but see a few old friends with you.”

You shrugged. “Apparently I was too cooped up in my room writing music. Tori dragged me out.”

“You're still writing music?” He asked. You gave him a small nod. “I'd like to hear it one day.”

“One day…” You muttered, your voice drowning out when you heard the voices.

“I swore I saw her, Mark.”

“You sure Jaehyun? Y/N has been avoiding all of us. She hasn't even been picking up Johnny’s calls.”

“I saw her too, Mark.”

“Even you Haechan? Wow, where was I at?”

You scanned his profile. Has things changed since the last time you saw him a year ago? He was still tall but he seemed to gain muscle. He hadn’t changed one bit. You let out a soft chuckle. “Jaehyun saw me first. Then Haechan. I ran away from them.”

“That sounds like you.” He chuckled. He bit his lower lip, probably thinking of what to say next. “Everyone misses you.”

But did you? You weren't about to ask him that though. “Yeah, I missed everyone too.”

“Y/N, I-” He started but was cut short when you shook your head.

“It's okay, Johnny.” You muttered, shaking your head. “You don’t need to say anything.”

Out of the blue, someone pushed you and you landed into Johnny’s outstretched arms. You pulled back almost instantly and he looked at you with sad eyes. If it was before your scandal and departure, you wouldn't have minded it. You would have thought he was joking or something like he normally did. Teased you, slightly pushed you away but… He didn't. His eyes held a certain sadness in them, as if he was telling you he was sorry for everything that happened, telling you that it was alright, telling you that he didn't mean those words.

You wanted to hear those words out loud. You wanted…

What did you want?

He reached out, cupping your cheek. “Y/N. I missed you.”

A Year Ago

“But why noona?” Haechan asked.

The rumors and the hate you were getting about your scandal and departure from your ex-group was stressing you out that the new company you were with was having trouble trying to control the situation. You had come to visit one of your best friends in the industry, letting him and his group mates know that you were going on a hiatus indefinitely and that you were going back home to the States.

“Do you really have to go noona?” Jungwoo asked from the couch.

You nodded, your hand touching the scar you received a week ago on your neck. It wasn’t going to go away anytime soon. “Yes. I’m tired and I just want to go home.”

“But Y/N, how will we keep in contact?” Yuta asked, frowning next to Haechan.

“I'm always a phone call away.” You gave him a small smile. “You can always call me when you need to.”

“You’re going to be on the other side of the world.” Taeil muttered, Doyoung nodding next to him. “It's going to be hard to contact you with our schedules and the time zone difference.”

“I know. I don’t want to do this but…” You trailed off and looked down at your feet.

“If you hadn’t gone to his house late at night, you wouldn’t be in this predicament.” Johnny muttered from his seat in the kitchen. 

Here it comes again. 

The fighting.

“And how was I supposed to know that some crazy paparazzi was going to be taking pictures?” You retaliated. This was not the first time that you and Johnny got into a heated argument about this topic. He felt so strongly about it and as much as you wanted to let it go, he always brought it back up. “He’s a friend. There was nothing going on between us.”

“Friend, my ass. You think the media thinks that? To them a female idol and a male idol are meeting in secret.” Johnny argued back, getting up to stride towards you. Sure he towered over you with his height, but there was no way you were going to be intimidated. “You really thought a girl like you could really be with someone like him? Dream on, Y/N. Get over yourself. He doesn’t love you.”

“I know he doesn’t! And I don’t like him in the romantic sense. Why are you being such an ass?” You glared up at him. You could tell the boys were getting concerned, Doyoung and Jungwoo backing away from whatever fist fight Johnny and you were going to put up. Jaehyun and Taeyong stood close by to step in if anything.

“I just wonder what’s going on with that thick skull of yours?! Of all guys, why him?” Johnny muttered out in English. For the past few times you've argued, it's been in English. He brought up his hand, as if to strike you, but clenched his fist and put it down. “If you wanted to date someone, you could’ve dated one of the guys. Taeil or Taeyong is a better choice than him!”

“Why do you always think I like him?! Why do you always jump to conclusions whenever I have guys as friends?” You retaliated back in English. “Why are you concerned about who I date and don't date?”

Johnny scoffed and threw his hands in the air. He gave you an incredulous look. “Who wouldn’t like him? He’s popular compared to NCT. You’d like to be the center of attention, don’t you? Especially after your group kicked you out.”

Center of attention?

Ouch. What a way to hit someone when they were down.

“Of all people, I thought you would be supportive of me Johnny! We go way back since our high school and college days and this is how you think of me?!” You shouted, the other members of NCT 127 backing away. You took a deep sigh out of frustration and looked him in the eyes. “Fine! I’m done.”

“What are you talking about Y/N?” Johnny shouted back, his hands grasping your shoulders.

“Yeah, it’s like you said Johnny. I like being the center of attention since I'm not the popular one in my ex-group. What else can I do when even my vocal trainer says I can't sing but you know for a fact that I could sing better than any of those girls? But you know what? I don’t need your permission or approval to do the things I want to do.” You shook yourself from his hands and stared at his angry face. You grabbed your things and headed towards the door. “I’m leaving Seoul. And I’m not coming back. Not for those girls, not for him… And especially not for you.”

“Y/N, I missed you.”

What a liar. No he didn’t. He was the one who pushed you away first.

Johnny looked down at you, his eyes filled with sadness. Perhaps regret? You looked away, not wanting to get drowned in those eyes of his. And as much as you missed the man, you couldn’t forgive him for pushing you away like that. What he said was a hard blow. It even hurts to think about it. You hated to admit that you missed him, but after remembering what he said, you just couldn’t help but be mad and angry.

“Sure you did, Johnny.” You shrugged his hands off. You crossed your arms across your chest, and couldn’t help but notice that Johnny looked down at you. “I don’t have time to listen to your excuses. Now if you excuse me…”

“You’ve changed Y/N.” He muttered, running a hand through his hair. His eyes ran over your body, probably checking out your outfit.

“I’m still the same person.” You looked back at him. “You’re the one who’s changed.”

“I…”

“Is hyung hitting on a girl?” You heard a voice call out in Korean. From the corner of your eye, you saw the other members of NCT 127 make their way towards you both.

“Hush. Maybe she's an old friend of his.” Mark replied in Korean, as they stopped in front of you and Johnny. He took your profile in, his eyes scanning up and down, and if he noticed who you were, he didn't say anything.

“Hyung, are you making this pretty girl cry?” Jungwoo asked, giving you a concerned look. It was like he didn't recognize you because he started to speak in broken English. “Oh, is Johnny making you sad?” 

You giggled. That broken English of his was adorable. It made you want to protect him despite him being in his twenties. “I'm fine Jungwoo-ah. Your English is improving a lot. Speaking full sentences now!”

“She’s speaking Korean! Wait, she said my name. Do we know each other?” The man asked in Korean, as he looked at you, his face scrunched up. He had to remember you with the way his face lit up a few seconds later. “Oh! Y/N-noona!”

You nodded, a small smile lighting up your face. “Hi guys. It's good to see you again.”

“See? I told you we saw her, Mark.” Haechan frowned at Mark.

“Why'd you bolt out like that earlier?” Jaehyun asked seconds later. “Almost gave me and Haechan a heart attack.”

“I'm sorry.” You sighed and ran your fingers through your hair. “I had a little too much to drink and thought you two were going to do something perverted.”

“More like you'd do something perverted, Y/N.” Mark chuckled, coming forward to give you a small hug. “It's been a year. We all miss you.”

“I missed you too, Mark.” You returned his hug, hands coming to pat his back lightly. “But can you let go of me now? My friends are going to fight you if you hug me too long.”

“What friends?” Mark muttered as he pulled away from you. You pointed behind him and he turned around, noticing the two girls who stood a few feet away, both glaring at him and the other members. “Them? They look like they won’t hurt a fly.”

“You’d be surprised.” Johnny answered back, his members giving him a confused look.

You nodded, Tori and Becca coming to your side instantly. They linked their arms with yours and stared at Mark, the male backing away. Johnny couldn't help but chuckle. You let out a small smile. “Hey, you two. Sorry about that. I needed a breather.”

“Were these guys bothering you, Y/N?” Tori asked menacingly, looking over at each of the guys. 

“You're okay, right?” Becca looked you over, checking for any signs that you were hurt. She gestured to Mark. “That man over there didn't do anything inappropriate to you, did he?”

“Inappropriate?” Mark softly asked, Johnny stifling a laugh. 

The girls both spoke to you in English, with only Johnny, Mark and Jaehyun understanding everything. The other six probably understood, since they were English capable on command. When did you start speaking to them in Korean? Heck, when did you start speaking in Korean when it was just Johnny and you alone earlier?

You shook your head. “It's okay, girls. They're friends of mines from Korea. Plus, I think you know one of them already, although I don't know if you'll recognize him.”

“Why would we know idols?” Becca asked, eyeing the members. Yeah, she really didn't know the group.

“I'd like to refer to ourselves as musicians and artists.” Johnny responded, suddenly throwing an arm around you. “Right, Y/N?”

You looked at him and debated on whether you should fling his arm off but then thought better of it. You couldn't let your friends think that you were having drama with the guys despite what happened a year ago. “Uh huh. Sure, Johnny. The boys think of themselves as musicians and artists. Tori, Becca, meet NCT 127. Guys, meet my best friends, Tori and Becca.”

“Before you introduce yourself,” Tori said to Johnny and gestured to the other members behind us. “Do they all even know English?”

“Yeah! It’s one thing to speak and understand English and it’s another when you memorize just words.” Becca inputted.

“Of course, they understand. They’re English capable. Apart from Mark and Jaehyun…” You sighed and ran a hair through your dark hair. Johnny tucked a random piece of your hair behind your ear and looked down at you, nodding at your answer. You looked up at him and gestured with your chin, “…and this guy, the others understand. Introduce yourself already.”

“Geez, okay. Don’t have to be mean about it.” Johnny, with his arm still around you, let out a chuckle. He lazily waved at the other two girls, leaning his tall frame unto your short one. “Hey guys. It’s your boy Johnny. Hope you guys remember me.”

Tori bit her lip. “Johnny…”

“I don’t remember a Johnny...” Becca asked, her face scrunched up. “Wait…OH! The one dude that always followed after Y/N back in high school?” 

“I never followed after her.” Johnny grumbled. Despite the protest, you could tell he was enjoying the banter since his chest rumbled with laughter, ever so slightly. “She followed me.”

“Whatever, John Jun Suh.” You retorted, using his full name. You never used his full name unless it was to tease him or when you were mad with him. “You were following me, along with all the boys that were in my fan group. Goes to show that I was a beauty back in high school.”

Upon hearing the words coming from your lips, Johnny gave a side look, his eyes soft. His big smile turned into a small soft one. He replied in Korean, so Tori and Becca couldn’t hear. “You still are beautiful.” 

“Hyung.” Doyoung frowned, obviously catching what the second eldest member said. “Don’t be flirting with Y/N-noona like that. You know how she gets.”

“Johnny,” Taeyong started, eyes flickering back and forth between the two of you. It was clear that the boys would be speaking in Korean, since they wouldn’t want the girls to know what was going on. “I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to be casually flirting with Y/N.”

“Yeah, especially with what happened.” Taeil muttered, slightly concerned about how this was going to go down. Yuta nodded next to him.

“Are you guys dating?” Becca interrupted everyone as she pointed to you and Johnny. “Because you two look really friendly.”

Jaehyun responded with wide eyes but you shook your head, signaling that you had it under control.

“It’s okay, guys.” You smiled at them. Suddenly wrapping your arms around Johnny’s neck, you gazed up at him. “You owe me for this. And don’t think I forgive you too.”

And before Johnny could respond at the sudden act of you wrapping your arms around him, you stood on your toes and pressed your lips to his. 

Even you were surprised at your own actions.

What were you doing? Of all people, why is it Johnny Suh that you’re kissing?

Did you miss him that much that you just wanted to kiss him?

It couldn’t be. You and Johnny were friends. You’ve known each other for years and never once did he show any romantic interest in you or you in him.

You felt his strong arms coming to wrap around your lower back, his fingers lingering on the span of naked skin that was exposed from your clubbing outfit. You felt him tightening his hold on you, his soft lips slowly moving against yours, the deep breaths he took, the rise and fall of his chest. Your bodies were so close that you could feel his rapid heartbeat through the layers of his clothes and it made you wonder if he could feel yours.

You mentally scolded yourself, wondering why you were doing this. No, you shouldn’t have done it. You shouldn’t have kissed him just to have your friends think that you’re friendly with him. Or dating him. What will the boys think after? That you’re suddenly making a move on the second eldest NCT member?

What would Johnny think?

Johnny rested his forehead against yours as you broke the kiss, trying to get his breathing back under control. His arms were still wrapped against your lower back, your own still around his neck. His eyes were closed, a small chuckle escaping from his lips. “Y/N…”

“Don’t.” You whispered, slightly shaking your head against his. “Don’t ruin the moment because it won’t happen again.”

He kept quiet, as if he was contemplating your words. He pulled his head back some, still holding on to you as he stared down at your face. “I─”

“We’ll leave you two lovebirds alone.” You heard Tori call out. Shit, you forgot about them. You glanced over to where she stood, her arms latched onto Yuta's right arm and Jaehyun’s left arm. The boys had confused expressions on their faces and looked at Johnny for some sort of guidance.

“Yeah, you two probably have a lot to catch up since it’s been a year since you last saw each other.” Becca nodded and you noticed that she too, had her arms latched onto Taeyong and Haechan. “So we’ll go back into the club with the guys.”

“You guys can drink, right?” Tori asked Jaehyun, who nodded in return. You watched as they walked into the club and you couldn’t help but stifle a chuckle when you saw the look on Mark’s face when he realized that he had to translate for everyone.

“Johnny-hyung!” Haechan called out, as Jaehyun shot you both a look. “Don’t do anything stupid!”

“What did he say?” Becca asked Mark, stopping momentarily as she nodded at Haechan. Mark shrugged in response as Becca just smiled and dragged the poor guys into the club.

“I miss that laugh and smile.” You heard Johnny mutter, still aware that his arms were settled on your lower back. He gave you a boyish grin and you couldn’t help but bite the inside of your cheeks before you let out a weird shriek. “So…can we talk about what’s going on between us?”

You shrugged yourself out of his grasp, moving away to put some distance between you both. Now this was awkward. Really awkward. You ran a hand through your hair and gestured to you both. “This kiss that happened between you and I, forget about it. It never happened.”

“Y/N.” Johnny started, coming to stand in front of you. “If you’re still mad about what happened a year ago─”

“I am!” You interrupted him and looked away. Did he not understand that what he said made you furious? “I’m still mad at you, Johnny. That fight, those words…I still remember it so clearly. I thought we were best friends and nothing could come between us, but I guessed wrong. What happened when we suddenly started fighting? What happened that made things take a wrong turn?”

“He happened.” Johnny muttered, looking down at the ground. “Ever since he came into the picture, things have changed between us. You started hanging out with him and his members more than you hung out with me and the rest of the guys. You’d blow off our plans to do other things with them.”

“You were mad because I had other friends?” You asked, with an airy sigh. “Johnny, you’re my best friend. Even if I made new friends, you’re the most important one. We grew up together.”

“Yeah. But people change Y/N.” Johnny said as he stepped in front of you and laid a hand on your arm. “You changed and I changed.”

You looked up at him and shrugged his hand off. “Because of him, huh? Because I was getting closer to him than anyone else.”

“He wasn’t good for you Y/N.” Johnny muttered as he returned the stare. “Anyone is better than him.”

“Like who?” You asked, watching as he averted his eyes. “The boys? You?”

“You know I’m only looking out for you.” Johnny replied back as he bit his lower lip. “You’re one of my best friends and I want what’s best for you. Taeil or Taeyong, heck even Jaehyun, was a better choice.”

Friends, huh? 

Why was that a slight blow? Did you want something more from him? Were you expecting something else from him? You just felt disappointed and you didn’t even know why.

You just wanted to hear something else. Something that showed that he saw you as a woman and not a friend.

Even something little.

“Don’t deny that you guys aren’t together.” Johnny said, as he stuffed his hands in his pocket, and blew his hair from his face. “I know you too damn well to know when you lie to me.”

“Even a year later, nothing escapes you huh?” You muttered, as you crossed your arms across your chest. “Things wouldn’t have turned out this way if I hadn’t gone to his place in the middle of the night and kept my legs closed.”

“Wait, what? You slept with him?” Johnny asked, his voice somehow getting a bit loud. The wrinkles started to form on his forehead as he furrowed his eyebrows. “Tell me you’re kidding.”

You bit your lip and shook your head. “I’m not kidding Johnny. We had sex a few times. I never told you because I know how you get.”

“Y/N─” Johnny started but you shook my head.

“See, you’re doing it again.” You interrupted him as he ran a hand through his hair. “Can we not fight again, Johnny? I’m getting tired of always fighting with my best friend.”

“I’m not going to argue with you or anything.” Johnny sighed as he crossed his arms. “I just wished you’d told me. Then I could have prevented it from happening.”

“Prevented what? Having sex with him?” He nodded in reply and you let out an exasperated sigh. “I’m a grown woman who has urges, Johnny. I don’t prevent you from having sex with other girls.”

“What other girls?” He asked, blinking a few times.

“Don’t play dumb with me.” You muttered. “What girl wouldn’t want to sleep with a handsome guy like you?”

“Oh?” He raised his eyebrows. “So that explains everything, huh?”

“Shut up.” You rolled your eyes. You were curious about why he never wanted you to date others. “Besides, I fell for his sweet stupid words and lies. Why don’t you want me dating other men? You can’t be jealous, can you?”

He turned away quickly and you caught a slight nod of his head. Just a slight nod. “Yeah, I get pretty jealous. It’s because…”

“Because…?” You cocked your head slightly, waiting for an answer.

“You’re my best friend.”

“Bullshit.”

“It’s because Jaehyun likes you.” He muttered, averting his gaze away. He looked over to the small crowd that gathered around the venue’s door. “That’s why.”

“Jaehyun?” You scoffed. You knew Jawhyun didn’t like you. “Yeah right. Jaehyun’s in love with himself. What’s the real reason?”

“Okay, okay!” Johnny turned back towards you and took a deep sigh, before pulling you into his arms. He took you by surprise as he tightened his hold. He rested his chin on your head so that you couldn’t see his face. But his heart was beating pretty fast. “After I tell you this, I’m not sure if we can go back to what we were before. But still I have to say this. I like you Y/N. I tried to hold it down but I can’t do it anymore. It took me a long time to say this…but I really, really like you. Fuck, I might even love you.”

“Wait. What?” Before you could even let out another sound, he silenced you with a kiss. It was different from the one you gave him earlier. His was soft and tender and you couldn’t help but revel in it. It was different from other kisses you’ve had with other men and...you can’t believe you’re actually saying it...but you really like it.

“Johnny, say it again.” You breathed out in between kisses.

“Please don’t make me say it again.” He muttered against your lips, resting his forehead against yours. Johnny cupped your face with one of his big palms, his thumb softly caressing your cheek.

You let out an oddly satisfying sigh. “Or you’ll do what?”

“Geezes, woman.” He chuckled lightly before pecking you softly on the lips again. “You drive me crazy.”

Johnny wanted to hold hands in the club, but you weren’t quite ready yet. At least not mentally. Sure you both exchanged a couple more kisses here and there before making your way back into the venue. Sure your best friends thought that Johnny and you were a couple.

But you weren’t so sure about the boys. Hell, you don’t even know about your own damn feelings.

Were you a couple? Were you officially a thing?

Did you like Johnny like how he likes you? Or has it been so long since you felt the touch of another man, that your body is just yearning for him? Yeah, it had to be that. You had to be sexually frustrated to even think of sleeping with your best friend.

God, does he look good right now.

NO. NO. NO. NO. 

Y/N, stop it. You’re just a bit horny all because Johnny just kissed you.

Stop it.

You looked over at him as he conversed with Tori and Becca, no doubt catching up on old times. As if sensing that you were looking at him, he turned his head to look at you and sent you a smile that made you weak in the knees and momentarily short of breath.

“You okay there, Y/N?” He asked in Korean, swiping at the hair that fell into his eyes. “Are you tired? Do you want to rest for a bit?”

You shook my head. “I’m okay, Johnny. Where are the boys? I haven’t seen them since we got back into the club.”

“Jaehyun went to the bar with Taeil and Doyoung.” Johnny pointed towards the bar where you saw the three members waiting on their drinks. “Jungwoo went to the restroom and Mark, Haechan, Taeyong and Yuta are dancing in the corner over there.”

“Does he really dance like that?” Tori asked as she watched Taeyong dance.

“Yep.” Johnny nodded. “He’s one of the main dancers.”

The boys came back to your cozy spot at the club and settled themselves comfortably in the lush seats. Although not as fluent in English as Johnny, Mark or Jaehyun, the boys conversed in English as they tried to get to know Tori and Becca better.

“Where are you guys staying?” You randomly asked Johnny as he fiddled with the beer bottle in his hand. He opened another one and handed it to you. “At a hotel?”

“Nah, I’m crashing back at home for the duration of our stay here. The boys are at a hotel.” Johnny chuckled as he pulled out his phone and showed a recent picture he took with his mom. “Mom is pretty happy that I’m back home for once. Oh yeah, are you staying with your parents?”

“No, I got my own place.” You replied, as you cooed over the picture, complimenting how cute his mom was. “Mom and Dad were pretty disappointed that I moved out.”

“Because you keep bringing guys over?” Johnny joked as he slid his phone back into his pocket.

“It’s because I don’t bring guys over.” You rolled your eyes and Johnny couldn’t help but laugh.

“But imagine the look on our parents' faces if they knew we hooked up.” Johnny chuckled as he took a drink of his beer. So you were just hooking up, huh? “My mom would make you move in ASAP.”

“Not unless my mom makes you move in her house instead.” You laughed as well. “They live down the street, so I don’t understand why they make such a big deal over it.”

Johnny leaned back in his seat and looked over at you. His eyes seemed to roam along your whole body and for once, you felt pretty self-conscious around him. “It must be nice to have your own place though. I share a room with Haechan in the dorms.”

“You’d think by now you’d have your own place with the way you are bringing girls home.” You raised your eyebrows teasingly at him. “Hey, I had a weird thought. Did you want to stop by my place maybe later tonight?”

“Holy shit, Y/N.” Johnny let out, his chest rumbling in laughter.

Shit.

Did you really just say that? Did you really invite Johnny to come back to your apartment later? What in the hell is wrong with you?

You looked towards the others and noticed that Tori and Becca talked about some random hottie they saw on the dance floor. The boys seemed distracted by a group of young men and women dancing in front of them, Taeyong debating if he wanted to join them. But the look Johnny gave you, made you curse myself.

“Yah, Y/N.” Johnny started in Korean as he scooted closer to you, his hand snaking around your waist and pulling you closer. “Are you inviting me over to your place to have fun?”

“Forget I said anything.” You rolled your eyes at him. “Who’d want to have fun with you?”

“Hey, you’re the one who said that girls can’t resist a handsome man like me.” Johnny chuckled as his fingers tapped against your naked midriff. “I’m handsome. I can dance. I have a deep voice for singing and rapping...”

“Dammit, Johnny.” You cursed aloud, the others looking your way. They raised their eyebrows before continuing their conversations and whatever the hell they were doing. “I hate you. I really hate you.”

Johnny moved his body even closer to yours and raised his eyebrows. “So onto a very touchy subject...How was sex with Hyunsik?”

Why did he bring that up? “It was okay, I guess.”

Im Hyunsik, one of BTOB’s vocalists and the father of majority of their music. The man you’ve slept with on numerous occasions. The man you had a scandal with. When was it that you started that forbidden relationship with Hyunsik?

Ah.

You were also promoting with the girl group you were in as well. You remembered after your performances, NCT 127 invited your group out for drinks but the other girls declined since they were quite a bit younger. 

You met the members of BTOB at the restaurant you went to and despite being attached to the members of NCT at the hip, the guys in BTOB seemed to attract your interest. And before you knew it, you started to hang out with them more and become friends with them. You vaguely remember Hyunsik asking you to meet up with him alone one time but how the relationship progressed from being just friends to friends who have sex with each other...you don’t remember at all.

“Oh?” Johnny raised his eyebrows. “Hm…. I would’ve thought that Im Hyunsik would’ve blown your mind. I mean he is a great vocalist and probably has lots of skills.”

“Yah. Keep your dirty thoughts to yourself, Johnny Suh.” You muttered, seemingly distracted by him. “And stop mentioning his name. It’s weird.”

“So then you don’t mind me asking…” Johnny smirked as he leaned his face closer to yours. “What do you think about us going to your place and just fuck?”

“What did you just say, Johnny?” You heard him wrong, right?

Johnny gave you a slight smirk, his long fingers touching, caressing, my naked midriff. You could see from the corner of your eyes that Tori and Becca were watching you both and if the boys saw it too, they probably ignored it. “You know what I said. Let’s go back to your place. Unleash the beast. Let this soldier have the spoils of war. Fuck.”

“Did you compare yourself as a soldier and me as the spoils of war?” You asked, scrunching your nose. You could care less about his vulgar language considering you used it pretty often, but did this guy really compare himself to a soldier?

“Did you like that? It was good, huh?” He asked, pretty proud of himself for coming up with that analogy. “Man, I’m a genius.”

“What a loser.” You rolled your eyes and looked at him. Just because he was being a tease, you thought you’d tease him back by running a finger down his chest. He took a sharp breath, his eyes wide. “But I’m down to let this soldier surround himself in his spoils of war.”

“Geezes, woman.” Johnny let out as he tried to control his breathing. “Were you like this with Hyunsik?”

“Yah,” you frowned and stopped. “Didn’t I say not to mention his name?”

He frowned as he grabbed hold of your finger. “Well, I don’t know what type of things you do with Hyunsik. Did you tease him like this too?”

You shook your head. “No. He did most of the teasing.”

His face lit up when you said that. He looked like a happy child at the candy store, surrounded by a whole bunch of sweets. “Ouuu~ So I get to experience sweet little Y/N’s teasing.”

“Go get a room, you two.” Tori called out, Becca nodding beside her. “We know you guys missed each other but come on.”

“Yeah. Go explore each other elsewhere.” Becca added, holding in her laugh. She turned to Tori, a big smile on her face. “I can’t believe today is the day we see Y/N with a guy.”

“And not even telling us about him, at all.” Tori shook her head in disappointment. “How could you not tell us that you had a boyfriend? Were you scared that we wouldn’t approve of Johnny?”

“I forgot to be honest.” You shrugged. You and Johnny were not a couple. You’d probably never be. At least you think so. “And you were always annoyed with Johnny back in high school. If I remember correctly, you kept getting annoyed with him whenever he signed up for the talent show.”

“Well this was before he started to sound so good!” Tori exclaimed, giving Johnny a sad frown. But it was only for a little while until her expression changed into that of a fangirl. 

“And before he started to look this good too.” Becca raised an eyebrow in appreciation. “Damn, what a glow-up. Y/N, you lucky bitch.”

“Stop giving him googly eyes, Becca.” You pinched her arm and she jumped in response. You gave her a small smile. “He’ll start getting a big head if you compliment him like that.”

Taeyong was sitting across from us, shaking his head in disapproval as the girls and Johnny laughed. He spoke in Korean, giving you and Johnny a frown. “Johnny, didn’t we tell you not to flirt with Y/N like that?”

“They haven’t seen each other in a year because of you-know-who and now they’re back to being normal.” Doyoung pouted.

Normal? Things did not get back to being normal, Doyoung. 

If anything, it took a weird turn. 

You had the biggest fight ever with Johnny a year ago, got reunited with him a few hours ago, kissed him like thirty minutes ago while he confessed to liking you, and now he wants to have sex with you. That’s normal? 

Oh, Kim Doyoung, you cute, innocent man.

“So noona and hyung are back to being friends?” Haechan asked as he shook his leg to the music.

Jungwoo shrugged. “I think so. Hyung, are you and noona back to being friends?”

Johnny looked at you, a mischievous smirk on his face. “Oh yeah. We’re back to being friends. Right, Y/N?”

That wink. Why did he have to do that? Be still your heart.

Johnny is just your best friend. Just your best friend of many, many years. A friend who is apparently attracted to you. Nothing more, nothing less… 

But what if…? No. 

You doubt Hyunsik will care about what you did or who you do. And if he does, you’d deal with that matter the next time you’re in Seoul.

If you ever return.

“Yeah, we’re back to being friends.” You nodded, not letting Johnny’s suggestive tone get to you. “Oh yeah. Do you guys want to go to my apartment so we can just chill and catch up?”

Johnny furrowed his eyebrows, when he heard you invite the others. 

Johnny Suh, I can not be alone with you anytime soon. You are apparently not good for my heart.

“It’s okay, Y/N. It’s kind of getting a bit late out so we’ll visit tomorrow if you don’t mind.” Taeyong smiled, the others agreeing.

“Johnny could walk you home though.” Taeil nudged Johnny playfully. “Right?”

“Yeah. I don’t mind.” Johnny chuckled, glad that the boys were bailing.

Damn. 

You thought you could get away with it, but apparently not. You told the girls that you were going to head home and they happily saw you and Johnny off. It had taken you about maybe fifteen minutes to walk back to your apartment since you didn’t live that far from the club. You opened your door and let Johnny in, he took off his shoes and slowly padded into your territory.

Your somewhat empty territory.

“Yeah… Sorry it looks empty.” You muttered as you scratched the back of your head. Your living room barely had any furniture apart from the couch, a coffee table, the TV, and a keyboard on one side of the wall. Your kitchen only had the basics such as a microwave, a coffee pot, and a few pots and pans scattered around the counter. “I haven’t had the time or money to buy more things.”

“I hope you don’t sleep on the floor.” Johnny shook his head as he took in the condition of the apartment.

“Nah, my bedroom is the only place that has the most furniture.” You laughed as he plopped himself on the couch. “I spend most of my time there anyway. Writing lyrics, composing music, playing the guitar, and sleep.”

“You still playing the guitar?” Johnny asked, his eyebrows raised.

“Yeah. Just because I couldn’t when I was an idol doesn’t mean I stopped playing it.” You muttered as you sat next to him. “Now that I’m no longer in the group, I could write my own music and play the guitar all I want.”

“I want to hear one of your songs one day.” Johnny took your hand in his big ones and entwined your fingers together. “You’re amazing, you know that?”

“I know. You’re amazing too.” You smiled up at him, he returned an even bigger smile.

“I really am sorry, Y/N.” Johnny muttered as he brought his other hand to tuck your hair behind your ears. “If I had the chance to return back to that time, I would have told you how I felt, how I like you. You would’ve been mine and you wouldn’t have been in this predicament. You wouldn’t have this scandal staining your reputation. You could have been happy with me.”

“I get it. And I accept your apology.” You gave him a soft smile. “But what’s done is done, Johnny. We can only move forward.”

“Moving forward, huh?” He let out a small laugh before leaning his body closer to yours, his hands on my waist. “Let’s move forward together.”

He closed the distance between you both and sensually placed a trail of kisses down your collarbone. Oh God. You loved it when he did that.

“So I guess we should talk about the future then.” Johnny stated as he bit your neck softly, his teeth grazing your skin.

“Uh huh.” You hummed as he trailed kisses down your shoulder, nibbling on your skin gently. “The future.”

“I don’t want to put you in this difficult position.” He looked up at you, those warm brown eyes brightening up.

Difficult position? As in sexually frustrated?

As in sexually frustrated, wanting to devour you?

Whoops. Way to give him ideas.

But no, you wanted to move forward, make something real. Even if it was just a one night stand even though you wanted more.

“Then what do you want?” You smirked, knowing exactly where this was heading. The kiss became harder, the movements more passionate. You grind your hips against his as he moaned in pleasure, both of you breaking away for a second to catch your breath.

“What I want is you. For as long as I want. I don’t want to leave your side anymore.” His words sent chills down your spine, goosebumps appearing on your skin. “I want to spend every waking moment with you. Whether we’re in Korea or America. Even if it’s just eating meals together, walking through the park, working out, watching movies, singing karaoke, spending holidays with each other, I want to spend every single second of my life with you. All of you.”

Wait, hold up. What? “What did you say?”

“Everything I said.” He grinned, a dimple appearing on his left cheek. “All of it. Every word.”

“You’re crazy.” You whispered. You hadn’t expected him to say that. Of course, you had hoped that he liked you but that was taking it to another level.

“Am I?” He asked, cupping your cheek with his hand. “Tell me. Is that crazy?”

You’d never thought someone could love you that much. Someone who wasn’t family or a lover. But Johnny loves you that much. You’re loved by someone else other than yourself. By someone who also made you feel special. Loved. 

You squeezed his hand tight, loving the feeling of his rough thumb running circles over your palm. “No, Johnny. You’re not crazy. I’m speechless.”

His lips met yours again, his tongue pushing its way past your lips, teasing you. You parted your mouth, welcoming his tongue inside, caressing yours, dancing along them in perfect harmony. It felt like nothing you had ever experienced before, every touch, every kiss, every movement meant something, each syllable spoken and breathed into your ear created memories to last forever. It was as if nothing existed outside of this moment right now, this connection between the two of you.

You broke the kiss and rested your forehead against his, breathing heavily.

“You’re too good to me.” You muttered. “How am I supposed to reciprocate this?”

“What do you mean?” Johnny cocked his eyebrow, clearly not understanding your question.

“I don’t deserve you.” You admitted, tears starting to form in your eyes. “Not after what happened. Not after how I left.”

“Y/N…” Johnny pulled you closer, wrapping his arms around your waist. “Please don’t cry. I can’t handle seeing you sad. Don’t cry, baby. Please don’t cry.”

“Why are you doing this to me?” You cried as he held onto you tighter. "I should hate you for pushing me away. But I don't. I can't."

"I know I shouldn't have gotten mad." Johnny started. "For me to blame you was wrong. So fucking wrong. That was all me. I got jealous. I was insecure. I'm just a stupid man."

"Don't apologize." You sniffled. "Apologizing means you're admitting that you're at fault. You're not at fault, Johnny. This isn't your fault. None of this is your fault."

"Y/N…" Johnny sighed, wiping the tears from your cheeks. "I've always wanted to tell you this. That I love you. That I like you. That you have this effect on me. That whenever I'm around you, my entire world stops. That I could stare at you for hours without moving a muscle. That when you touch me, it's electrifying. That when you look at me, I can't help but fall in love. That I'm not a person, I'm a pile of melting ice cream when you look at me. That I become this jumbled mess when I think of you. When I think of us. You are everything. Everything to me."

"Me too, Johnny." You giggled as you kissed him again, you pushed him back on the couch so you could straddle his lap. You ran your hands through his messy locks, brushing his bangs out of his face. "When I think of you, I'm instantly happy. Everything else fades away. Nothing matters when I'm with you. My anxiety, my fears, my doubts, my insecurities… They all go away."

"And I need you, baby. So much. Like air." Johnny brought his hand up to cup your cheek, his thumb running along your jawline. "I don't want to be without you. I need you in my life, Y/N. I need you to fill that void in my heart. You're the only one for me."

"Johnny..." Your voice cracked as you tried to speak. Your heart was racing so fast, pounding so hard that you swore it would explode. Tears continued to fall from your eyes. "Are you sure?"

"Of course, baby." He chuckled. "Do you see anyone else sitting here besides you?"

"There's no one else but you." You mumbled, placing a gentle kiss on his lips. "Only you."

"Good. Because I'll never let you go." He murmured as his hand traveled down your stomach, towards your inner thighs.

You gasped loudly as he pressed a finger between your folds. "Oh god... Oh god, oh god, oh god."

"Ah, you like that?" Johnny teased as he lightly rubbed your clit with his middle finger. "Oh, you're so wet, Y/N. So hot."

"I need you. Now." You pleaded. "Right now, Johnny. Please."

"I'm not going anywhere." He whispered against your ear.

You don’t when or how, but both of you were suddenly naked. Your legs were trembling uncontrollably as he slid two fingers inside you, causing you to moan. You weren't even close to reaching climax yet, he had to stop. You needed him to slow down, prolong the pleasure until you could no longer bear it. Until your body couldn't take any more. You moaned louder, making him smile seductively.

"I bet you like this." He murmured, spreading your pussy open. "Wanting it, craving it. Telling me that you need me, that you want me. Don't deny it. Let go, baby. Let me take control. You won't regret it."

You nodded silently, closing your eyes. You felt his lips brush against your neck, your breasts, your abdomen. He traced little hearts all across your body with his tongue. Each touch, each lick, each kiss had you gasping in pleasure. One more minute and you'd come undone, panting as you writhed against his hand. "Johnny, please..."

"That's it, baby. Come for me." Johnny whispered as he continued to rub your clit. "Come on. Cum for me. Let go. Give me everything."

It was torture. You knew that once you came, he'd stop. And you didn't want that. It was bad enough that he had put you in this situation, why did he have to ruin it by stopping? You reached down and grasped his wrist, pulling his fingers away from you. He didn't resist, merely watched as you quickly brought your lips to his hand, sucking on his fingers. You hummed as his fingers touched your tongue, tasting yourself, tasting him. You moved his fingers back to your sex, licking them clean before pushing them inside you.

"Ah fuck." Johnny groaned as he watched you do whatever you pleased with his fingers. "You're killing me, baby."

"Sorry." You hummed, kissing his fingers once more before replacing them inside you. "But I really want to cum. I need to cum."

"You're damn right you need to come." Johnny growled, bringing his other hand up to cup your breast. "You've been denied for far too long. Just thinking about it has me horny as hell."

He slowly pulled his fingers out of you, leaving you empty and unsatisfied. You whimpered as he placed his fingers back in your mouth, letting you suckle on them once more. He wrapped his arms around you, pressing your body flush against his. "God, I need to be inside you."

"Please." You panted.

"Where, baby?" Johnny questioned, his fingers tracing patterns across your stomach. "Should I go deep or shallow? Should I use my fingers or just shove my cock inside you?"

You shivered, his words making your body quiver with excitement. "Shove your cock in me, Johnny. Please."

He grinned, opening your legs wide, his erection bobbing in front of your face. "I'm going to fuck you so hard, Y/N." He whispered, lightly running his thumb over your nipple. "So very hard."

You grabbed onto his shoulders, clinging onto him as he positioned himself between your legs. He pressed forward, his length rubbing against your slit, causing you to squirm and moan.

"Yes, baby. So beautiful." Johnny mumbled, lowering himself so that the head of his cock brushed against your entrance. "I want to slide inside you so badly."

"Please." You whined, biting down on your lip as he pushed forward slightly. The head of his cock slipped inside you, stretching you gently. His shaft pushed against the walls of your vagina, forcing you to widen your legs slightly. You arched your back as he penetrated you deeper, sighing as he filled you completely. "Oh god... You're so big, Johnny."

"Damn, you feel amazing." Johnny groaned as he began to thrust inside you.

"Goddamn, you feel amazing." Johnny echoed as he continued to thrust in and out of you.

You clung onto his shoulders, rocking your hips back and forth, meeting his thrusts perfectly. Each thrust caused you to moan louder, your body begging for more. "Fuck, Johnny. Please fuck me harder. Harder, faster."

"Give me everything, baby." Johnny panted as he fucked you hard. "All of you. Cum for me."

You gave him everything. Every bit of yourself. Giving in to his demands, accepting his commands, doing whatever he asked of you. Doing anything he told you to. All because he made you feel so fucking amazing. As you exploded around him, your orgasm pulsating within your womb, you came apart in his arms, screaming his name over and over again.

“Fuck! Johnny!”

"Oh god, baby." Johnny whispered as he slowed his thrusts. "I've never felt anything like that before. I'm cumming."

You closed your eyes, enjoying the sensation. You wrapped your arms around his neck, locking your legs around his waist, grinding against him as he shot his load inside you. He collapsed against you, both of you catching your breath.

"Holy shit, that was intense." You laughed, kissing him on the lips. "I haven't cum like that in like a year."

"Fucking hell, Y/N." Johnny cursed, wiping sweat off his brow. "You took my breath away."

"You did that to me." You laughed, grinning as you snuggled into his chest. "Let's go to bed. My bedroom is right over there."

"Yeah." Johnny smiled. "Bed sounds great."

"So does being in your arms." You smiled as you leaned in to kiss him.

"It doesn't get much better than this, Y/N." Johnny said softly, placing a gentle kiss on your forehead.

You woke up to the sound of your phone ringing on the bedside table next to you. Slowly getting up, you rubbed your eyes, the sunlight glaring through the curtains. You picked up your phone and looked at the screen, groaning when you saw Mark's name lighting up.

Pressing the green icon on your phone screen, you pressed the cellular device against your ear.

“Ugh, it’s so early, Mark. What do you want?” You muttered out, the blankets pooling around your waist. Your skin was sticky from the aftermath of whatever occurred during the previous night.

“Good morning to you too, sleeping beauty. Johnny over there?”

“Mmhmm. Why?” You let out, a muscular arm reaching out from the covers to squeeze your hip. You slapped his hand away, prompting him to peek his head out from the sheets to frown at you.

“He ain't answering his phone. Plus his mom keeps calling us.”

 “What did you tell her?”

“We said something about him meeting up with old friends and spending the night there or something.” You heard him mutter from the other side. There were groans from the distance and someone muttering about coffee, so you assumed the boys were all getting up from their sleep. “Just call his mom and let her know that you finally slept with her precious son.”

“Yah. Why do I have to be the one to tell his mom that we finally fucked?” You asked, looking at the man next to you, a mischievous smile on his face.

“Because you’re close to his parents. I mean your parents and his parents are friends right?”

“Yeah… But I don’t want to tell Johnny's mom that we had sex.” You groaned out, Johnny chuckling softly next to you. “It’s just so weird. Johnny's mom would probably tell my mom. And then my mom would probably tell me to lock Johnny down...”

“Well...not my problem! Have fun!”

“Yah! Mark Lee! Mark! He hung up.” You frowned when you noticed he disconnected the call. Shaking your head and leaving the warmth of your bed and Johnny's arms, you grabbed the closest towel you could find. You went to the other side of the bed and shook the muscular figure. “Johnny, stop pretending to be asleep. Go call your mom.”

“And tell my mom that we had wild, passionate sex?” Johnny grinned, suggestively raising one eyebrow.

“Nevermind. Don’t.” You shook your head. “I don’t want your mom to suddenly be treating me differently just because I took her son’s virginity.”

“I was not a virgin and you know it.” Johnny pouted. “Otherwise, you wouldn’t have been screaming my name so loudly last night.”

“I hate you Johnny Suh.” You replied back, your cheeks suddenly turning pink. You had to admit...he was good in bed.

“Mmhmm, I know. Are you going to shower?” Johnny muttered against the bedsheets, his eyes soft. You nodded. “Want me to join you?”

“If you did that, we’d never leave my apartment.” You chuckled as you gave him a quick kiss on the cheek. You moved towards the bathroom and gave him a small smile. “Can you start the coffee while I grab the shower first?”

“Why don’t we just shower together?” Johnny muttered as he sat up in bed, scratching his bare chest. “It’ll save us time.”

“You make a good point…” You scrunch your nose and then shake your head. “But no. Knowing you, we’ll be doing other things than shower.”

“Damn. It was worth a try.” Johnny mumbled under his breath as you chuckled and retreated to the bathroom. Swinging his feet out of bed and shrugging on his jeans, he made his way towards the kitchen to start up the coffee maker. He looked towards the bathroom, noticing that the door was wide open. “How do you like your coffee!?”

“Black please!” You called out through the bathroom door, the sound of the shower running.

Johnny chuckled, walking away from the coffee maker as it continued brewing. He went into the bathroom and leaned against the doorframe, eyebrows raised as he made out your silhouette behind the shower curtains. “You sure you don’t want it sweet and creamy like me?”

“You’re so weird Johnny.” You peeked out from the curtains and made a face. You nodded towards the shower. “But since you were being such a cutie by making coffee, you might as well join me.”

“Score!” He called out, discarding whatever clothing he had on and joined you in the shower.

#nct #nct stories #nct fanfic #nct imagines #nct 127 #nct smut #johnny #johnny suh #nct johnny #johnny x reader #johnny smut

[jeonqkooks]

goodbye :)

not really lol this was clickbait 🤠

BUT now that i have your attention, i am going on a semi writing hiatus tho. i feel like this is long overdue. i'd like to start off with a couple weeks, maybe a month, maybe longer, idk? we'll see how it goes.

i'll still be relatively active on tumblr - answering asks and whatever bullshit i usually do - and discord (bc let's face it, i have nowhere else to be lmao) so i guess this is mostly a formal announcement for myself so that my brain can process the fact that this! bitch! needs! a! f*cking! break! 👏 it's not like i even have a regular update schedule to begin with, so for most of you things will probably feel the same. but tbh for me, writing doesn't feel as fun as it used to. it hasn't for a while, and neither has being on tumblr in general (some days it fully feels bad being on tumblr but i'm still Here bc i do not know what to do with myself lol).

don't get me wrong, i still love writing and i still want to write. but i just want to be able to actually enjoy it instead of feeling pressured to do it, yk? so i just need to find the spark again bc right now it feels like a chore and we definitely don't want that 😕

also - i feel like most writers go through this at some point - i keep (unintentionally) comparing myself to other writers and a bitch just cannot stop lmao. i've noticed that whenever i feel stuck while writing, i'd look to others and i'd think "damn, why can't i do this or that?" and that'd just make me feel worse lol miss girl gotta work on that. i mostly keep stuff to myself and lately it's been a little More than usual and i don't want to keep going when i obviously need a break only to end up overflowing one day and impulsively deleting my account (i probably won't lol this is my permanent address)

i'll use the time off to get back into reading too - god knows i haven't been reading fics as much as i used to. apologies to all the writers whose works i've been dying to read for so long but just haven't had the energy to sit down and dig in. reading is one of my main sources of inspiration (i made this blog bc i loved reading so much that it inspired me to write my own shit!) so hopefully that'll help the process too ✌️

unrelated to the writing bit but i also kinda want to use the extra time to start working on a professional portfolio and maybe jump back into my wack ass redbubble shop lmao

sooo yeah. i'm not gonna pull a one direction and just ride off into the sunset for good lmao. if anything, i hope i'll pull a bangtan and bounce back with even more content and vigor than before. maybe this is jeonqkooks chapter two 😎

maybe this was a bit dramatic lmao but anyways, sorry to anybody who thought i'd be leaving. unfortunately, you're stuck with me until tumblr gets swallowed up by the sun <3

#take two playing in the background for eternity #i’ll see you dorks around #this has been a post

[mysteriouslybluepirate]

Thank you for offering your askbox. I've been thinking that Izzy being just a side character whose story wasn't main plot thread makes even better proof that not everything was well planned? If I was a writer and this would be easily the most discussed topic about the finale, I'd reflect on storytelling decisions I made. There's a good reason why Izzy's fate overshadows everything despite that he wasn't the point of the show.

(Post posted 10/31/23) Feel free to comment below if you agree or disagree, we're all here for discussions.

Thank you so much for this amazing question!! [If you're seeing this and want to discuss some aspect of S2, or my thoughts on OFMD overall, SEND ME AN ASK! I love doing this]

TLDR: Vague characterization from historical records means Jenkins is free to bend history without a lot of guilt. During early days of casting and during scene changes Jenkins got inspired by Con's audition tape. Con was told to play this shit as a Jesus/Judas relationship. An amazing performance in S1 keeps the character relevant in fandom spaces in the hiatus, and in Jenkin's mind for S2. The S1 season finale accidentally reveals a really interesting dynamic in Ed/Izzy's relationship. [Speculation from this point on] Jenkins feels like he needs to explore, with little plans to fully explore it. Fleshing out both Ed/Izzy abuse and love.

Jenkins realizes 'Oh shit, Izzy wasn't supposed to be this' midway through S2. But he still follows his original plan in killing him off, because he's not needed for the story in his outline, leading to him accidentally killing off a character as they're growing and healing. Leading to what some consider a move SO off-brand for the show, they are leaving the fandom.

[*Tin Foil Hat On*] I expect the original cut of S2 to include more scenes of the crew. I bet for every other Izzy scene, we got a crew scene. So when 'extra' not plot-relevant scenes had to get cut, they kept the Izzy scenes due to Izzy's stable arc, the fact that he'd die at the end either way and Con's amazing performance.

EXPLINATION AND DEPTH BELOW! It's a long one. A lot of this post will be speculation, interviews from Jenkins, and highly dependent on if you were in fandom between seasons 1 and 2. If you need me to hunt for sources, I can do that for you.

I'll separate everything into a chronological timeline as much as possible.

Before we touch on why Jenkins wrote Izzy to stick out in the story, we need to assume how he outlined this entire show.

Pre Con O'Neill:

I am of the personal belief that Jenkins likely wrote out an imagined arc for Ed and Stede. Including a lot of cool set pieces, fights, etc. for the three seasons he wanted vaguely based on the real lives of Stede Bonnet and Edward Teach(watch a YouTube vid documenting their history, it's a wild ride) turning it into something explicitly romantic. This is easy enough to do, as most of what we know about them was written YEARS after their deaths.

Next was filling in the cast. This is where we get our crew, mostly characters Jenkins made up, as very little is known of the men either sailed with.

Izzy Hands being a pirate under the age of 18 whose notable actions with Blackbeard include- Captaining his own vessel, running a ship aground, being Blackbeard's first mate, and getting shot by Blackbeard maybe on accident.

[THEORY] So. If you're any writer you see that and think 'cool a side character we know almost nothing about'. You slot him in as being Edward's one thing keeping him to the pirate lifestyle. Not necessarily romantic, but a serious Boss/underling relationship. This is a bit of how Izzy was written in S1 UNTIL-

Con O'Neill is cast as Izzy.

In interview, Jenkins has admitted that Con's audition tapes influenced how he wrote Izzy. As a writer, this shouldn't necessarily be ringing red flags. But he has gone on record as admitting to changing the script before shooting to suit Con. IN SEASON 1. My guess is Izzy at the end of episode 10 was meant to be more of a side character. Another Frenchie, or Wee John, who serves their purpose and then gets pushed to the side by the plot.

But at some point, Jenkins wrote how important the dynamic was between Ed and Izzy. Describing Izzy/Ed to Con before filming S1 of a 'Jesus and Judas' relationship like in Jesus Christ Superstar.

If you tell a (then closeted) queer actor who has been playing queer roles since the 1990s that his leather daddy character was having a Jesus&Judas JSC dynamic in a TV show that respects and celebrates queerness? 🤩 MY GOD.

[Speculation] That's how we get an Izzy Hands who is watching the man in front of him slip away, trying to dig his heels in. Hell, if I were Jenkins, I'd be adding a few more lines for Izzy to be pissed just to see Con have fun in the role. Let him be mad. Let him be in the background of scenes just glaring. Let us see a man slowly lose something he's built up his whole life.

[As mentioned from Comic Con- From Con O'Neill] This was important for me to bring up as Jenkins could have said 'henchman' but he didn't. Hell, when Taika and Con did hair and makeup they'd listen to the JCS cast album. It was a choice on both their parts.

[ovservation from here on out] Con plays it up, and a lot of queer fans saw this and grabbed hold of a man so desperate to keep the man he loved close that he sacrifices almost everything for it (Izzy also signs the Act of Grace to get Ed out of there).

Izzy, in a show full of openly queer people, is still on the fringe of society. SO MANY queers saw this and said 'OMG me'. ME INCLUDED. With a super supportive actor who genuinely is respectful of the fandom? Of art, and fic and meta? The Izzy 'Canyon' became so loyal because Con is a Queer Elder we didn't know we all needed in our lives!

Jenkins accidentally wrote into what could be an amazing story of a queer character living in a homophobic society where he learns to open himself up. All without ever writing a 'coming out' scene for Izzy. Jenkins knows this. Hell, since S1 Izzy fans have been telling him how cool that type of arc would be.

Now here comes the issue of where to take a side character, when you have loose plans for them.

S1 IS TIGHTLY WRITTEN ONTO ITSELF... S2?

Something we might forget now is HOW tightly written Izzy's falling out with Ed is tied into Stede and Ed falling in love. Beat per beat, Izzy is shoved away as Stede takes his place. That's really fucking smart. So smart, it was planned in the writer's room. The fact that some took it as romantic, that Ed could ever really love him back? Well...this is where Jenkins had a decision to make.

So he dips his toe. Let's make Ed even more violent than at the end of S1ep10. Let's include the bit where Blackbeard shoots Izzy Hands. Let's have Izzy confess his love for Ed and have it not be enough for Ed to change his mind. Let's show Izzy rising like a phoenix reborn after a failed suicide attempt where Izzy chooses to mutiny on Ed to protect the crew. Let's see Izzy growing. Because Jenkins loves Con's performance. Everyone in the cast enjoys him as a person. Let's give Izzy one last hurrah.

Jenkins knows this character meant a lot to Con. It's obvious in the way Jenkins recently confessed he told Con about Izzy's death midway through shooting. Sadly we likely will never be told when Con was told. But imagining Con filming the AMAZING character change of S2eps 1-2, then AFTER being told Izzy would die anyway? Oh. I wouldn't be alright. Not after all his fans had spent the last year telling him how much seeing a character like Izzy 'being accepted because they are worthy of love'.

This is the 1 thing that fucks me up. Not telling Con until midway through shooting, Versus his belief that writing Izzy's death was a fitting way to end his story. BOTH CAN'T BE TRUE. Right? If Jenkins felt the need to take con aside and go grab a meal to announce Izzy was dying but then market the ending as a 'Good Idea'. Then...What? If Con felt it fit the character, then he would have likely guessed Izzy would die. But that wasn't the vibe in the fandom at the time. It feels like a decision Jenkins made this season.

Because yes, some general audiences predicted that Izzy would die. But when your core fanbase for a character don't expect it, you didn't plan the death correctly. Fuck, I thought Izzy was trying to RECOVER this whole season. Not that Izzy was hiding how hard he was struggling. That's not a good sign when I've ALWAYS called Izzy as some brand of suicidal/depressed.

[Quote from Jenkins Entertainment Article: Oct 26 2023] 'What's the best journey we can give him(Izzy)? And what's the most interesting thing we can do with Con, who can do just about anything?'

That is not the quote of an author who has planned everything out. That's a writer who knows points A and E and is fighting to find everything in between.

The Fly in My Ointment

There's a point most writers know when a character or story slips out from under you. You didn't mean for this to happen. Hell, I write Scene by Scene outlines. My stories change. When Izzy Hands' growth arc became the most interesting part of S2, Jenkins had a choice.

How far was he willing to bend his idea to keep a character that wasn't 'essential'? Not that fucking far apparently. Because for some reason, Jenkin's labeled Izzy in his mind as 'Blackbeard' and tied Ed and Izzy's fates together. Ignoring how this season Izzy died to separate his old life with Ed from his new life with this crew.

Your question poses it perfectly- If I was a writer and this would be easily the most discussed topic about the finale, I'd reflect on storytelling decisions I made. There's a good reason why Izzy's fate overshadows everything despite that he wasn't the point of the show.

That's a trick they teach you in some writing podcasts. That in the end, you are telling one story. You can have twenty side characters and a romance arc, but in the end, you are telling one story. Each side character is going to show what happens when you fail or succeed at the central thesis.

What do we have in S1? What does Frenchie sing to set up where our story STARTS-

"A pirate’s life, [it’s] short but nice,” -“we won’t live long,”  AND “to death we go, a certain death we go.”

Our characters expect a short simple life of what most pirates EXPECT. In my mind, this story has ALWAYS been about survival. From the extravagance of Stede's ship, and a crew ready to throw him overboard, to the barebones Shark eats Shark type of survival described in Ed's own fleet. OFMD is about living in a world that doesn't want you there. About surviving and thriving. About these two men from different worlds coming together and forging a life of kindness for them and for their family.

Saying fuck you, I'm here, I'm still alive, and I'm going to THRIVE. I deserve kindness, happiness, love, and a fully lived life. I deserve to spend my short time on this Earth happy.

IN S2? The ONLY character that matches this thesis is Izzy. After scenes of Izzy struggling. Of finding himself. Of crawling up from his own personal hell, Izzy dies. He dies from a random bullet wound in the same spots that didn't kill Stede or Ed in the previous season. Breaking the one established rule for wounds in this universe that the left side is the safe side so that Izzy can die.

Even if Izzy spent this entire season wanting to die, he tried to live. For a few days after a breakup of over 20+ years of casual intimacy. Of a bond where Izzy was the murderer, the brawn. The dangerous right hand. Where Izzy dying meant not just his death, but likely that of Ed. Given the man's constant depressive moods, crews that didn't like him, and reoccurring suicidal tendencies. Ed didn't need Izzy Hands anymore. Ed had Stede now. He was ready to finally leave Izzy for good. What will Izzy Hands do now?

He gave up. He tried to move on. He listened after being told he was too rough, too loud, too mean. He tried. He tried to survive this new way of life surrounded by people who supported him. But he was tired. After so many years of putting up a mask, tearing it down was too much work. So he wanted to die. In the end. Izzy died in the arms of Edward surrounded by his family.

Buried on a plot of land Jenkins has already told us Stede and Ed will leave when things get boring. Left behind like the corpse of a pet the family has forgotten. Buried without his ring and cravat, items Izzy is only seen without when he's naked. Without the prosthetic gifted to him by a family that cared about him.

Izzy wasn't mourned for more than five seconds, before Stede and Ed were making jokes on his fresh grave, and then the episode moves on to a wedding.

RIP Izzy Hands- a man who loved more than he was ever loved in return.

Was this the right message? FUCK No. But for those of us who believed that theme of queer survival and community- We saw framing Izzy's death like this as a fucking betrayl.

Izzy Hands isn't buried with his most prized possessions- they're left out to be stolen or rot in the front yard. With only one man crying over his death and a silent funeral. He leaves this world without more than a 'he was intense'. Which...isn't great coming from the man Izzy loved for most of his life.

The reason why we're mad about Izzy isn't that it's Izzy. It's that when we boarded this flight we were given a set of rules to follow. It's a comedy about men falling in love on a boat that sometimes gets serious. That's it. To watch a character start to grow only to die for NO PLOT SPECIFIC REASON. Is insulting. If your death has no tie to the narrative (sacrifice or it comes with a revelation) it's a death just set up for shock. Izzy and Ed could have had that deathbed confession talk at the start of episode 7.

A REASON WHY I'M MAD BEYOND THAT SPECIFICALLY. [Very Personal Gripe]

A SALUTE TO CON O'NEILL -AGAIN!

I had the privilege of hyper-fixating on this show from the entirety of S1 ending to S2 beginning. During this time I explored the catalog of Con O'Neill's work on Tumblr under the tag 'Conography'. I watched this man play queer roles since the 1990s. Genderqueer/somewhere on the Trans spectrum, Gay, Bi. This man loves to play a queer story, even if it's sad. If it's tragic. He will breathe new life into their lungs and express their moments of Joy. Of love. Of community.

After the filming of S2 at a con, Con he felt comfortable publicly coming out due to the love and support he felt from our fandom. Do you know JUST how crazy that is? That Con KNEW Izzy was dead, yet he loved our fandom so much he let himself be vulnerable, and come out as queer? It's fucking INSANE to me, and shows just how much this show means to him.

He's not just Queer. He's a Queer fucking elder whose been protective of this entire community since S1. This 57-year-old man has proudly stood up in the name of Trans rights this entire time. Treating everyone, but especially Trans Izzy fans with so much fucking respect. Trans Izzy is a common headcanon partially because of how comfortable people feel knowing they won't get harassed because they interpret Izzy a certain way. That trans people feel at home seeing themselves as a misunderstood character with a chip on their shoulder.

I'm pissed for every in universe thing listed above AND NOW THIS. Because our Queer Elders are dead. There is a generation of Queer people we can never get back. They died from a mix of society pressuring these people into the closet or an early grave. Of disease running wild in communities unchecked. Of media ruining the careers of anyone who dared to come out. To see Con O'Neill So Fucking Happy and having it cut short because Jenkins thought Izzy was better dead than being an actual background character makes me see fucking red.

No. Jenkins probably didn't know Con was Queer when writing S2. But I'm assuming he still saw how happy Con was at Izzy fans before S2 was written which still makes it feel shitty.

Sure. Give Izzy all the amazing speeches about family and belonging and rip that right from his hands as soon as Izzy realizes it's something he might want for himself. Let's have Con O'Neill say all the prominent lines that are a blatant metaphor for why the Queer community needs to stick together.

Izzy's arc isn't just overshadowing the conversation because it was mismanaged and feels unplanned, it also just feels cruel to the central arc of this series. Add that to an actor who was so vocal about loving this community, it feels pointed to give him a tragic ending.

Jenkins doesn't need to consider why people hated this finale. Because there are SO MANY Ed/Stede fans who just don't care. They put Izzy in the box with every other side character and decided to put their effort into the protagonists and point and laugh when we suffer. Jenkins won't rethink anything because he can just say the 'Izzy community was passionate and are sad their favorite died'. Ignoring how this season made Stede into a shittier, less sympathetic captain and gave Ed an interesting arc only to give up before the finish line.

#Now. I didn't bring up how viewing Izzy as being useless post disability ALSO pissed people off but there are posts everywhere about that #physical disability is not my place so I don't overstep #THE WAY IZZYS DEATH WOULD WORK SO MUCH BETTER IF HE STEPPED INFRONT OF A BULLET MEANT FOR STEDE #Or that post floating around of Ed getting shot for Izzy. Showing that yes. Ed cares. that they're both fucked but are working on it #If most of the fan base hates the *implications* for S3 thanks to this ending it wasn't the right move #GOD I DIDN'T EVEN TALK ABOUT THE DAD/MENTOR THING. Ah well #it's taken me 3 hours to type this up. I'll add later if it needs be lol #ofmd s2 #ofmd season 2 #ofmd s2 spoilers #izzy hands #ofmd s2 finale #ofmd critical #ofmd meta #omfd analysis #israel hands

[alicepao13]

S06E10

For a golf episode, okay. For a filler, also okay. Not that much going on.

Let's get one thing out of the way first:

Episode title says caddy. They liked that pun, I guess. As the grammar website I checked explains it further, it's not considered a huge error.

CityTV has such a nerve to put their logo in there after all their scheduling changes and general lack of interest for this show (I have no beef with that interview man, I forgot his name, but his interview with Diesel and John Reardon before the season premiere was actually fun).

I absolutely had no idea that women's golf was so lucrative.

"All I heard is sandwich" Thank god for Sarah. I only like Sarah from now on. Not even Rex, he seems too into golf, although there are too many balls involved for a dog to stay indifferent.

Joe joined the golf club when Camilla was born? Didn't he, like, adopt her after he married her mother? Or is my recollection false?

Charlie had worked as a caddie. Well, certainly some backstory there. And of course he's like, the best of them at it even if he doesn't want to join the club.

Seriously, we can't take them anywhere. Especially Rex, whose nose doesn't take a single day off. Boom, one more day off ruined.

I tuned out in every single golf talk, which is unfortunate because it was mixed with the plot (still found the culprit as soon as they appeared on screen). It's just really hard to follow when I don't care about it at all. Since I like almost all sports, I consider those I don't like as non-sports. Mainly golf and formula car racing.

They cut the chase scene? What?

That scene where Charlie drives a golf cart and Rex runs alongside him does not deserve a cool music lmao

Charlie playing golf as he's interviewing a (at the time) person of interest. I can't decide if this is unprofessional or I just don't like golf.

Ah, please someone tell me how many shots they did for that uninterrupted shot of Charlie's short putt that went pretty close to the hole. I know that the guys actually golf in real life but this had to be close but also not go in the hole for Rex to grab it.

Amazon! How the hell can you put an ad about fast delivery in this show, when you consistently fail to deliver the actual show on time in your streaming service? Am I the only one seeing the irony here? Last season it was too early, this season too late.

Also, Jesse, don't you dare wear that. Charlie's orange jumpsuit was actually a better shade of orange than this one.

Okay, maybe there were a bunch of chase scenes in this episode so they felt they could lose one. Acceptable.

Poor Rex's head. I'd have liked more of Charlie's worry please, although it seems like we might get this in a future episode.

This might be the first time we see Rex's teeth as Charlie checks for god knows what. Come on, show, let Rex bare his teeth just once while growling at a bad guy!

*gasps* Skeletal remains! On a family show!

They shouldn't have spoiled Jesse's shirt in the end scene on their promotional pictures. Not that it's such a big thing, but they should actually stop uploading promotional pictures from the final scenes altogether, or post them after the show has aired.

I liked the teamwork in this one. I believe the golf episode had been brewing since S2, where they had to scrap the idea due to a heavy snowfall, which turned the golf field into a ski slope. There is no avoiding golf, apparently!

Promo: What the actual fuck. Charlie and Rex combined whump? Charlie thrown out of a moving truck? Rex missing? Charlie having temporary amnesia? Hospital? Is it my birthday? (Well, it's actually pretty close to my name day instead.) Please squeeze a scene in there with a worried Sarah, and I take back every single bad thing I said about this season (the show only, I don't take back anything about CityTV). Yes, even the whales.

Of course this would be the episode that they'd take a break on. Oh, well. After that terrible hiatus, I can stand to wait a few days. A day had passed already as I was looking for the episode (turns out that they knew what they were doing lol).

#hudson and rex

[lastweeksshirttonight]

Lee is re-watching Sherlock for some fucking reason - Season One

I'm well aware that the crossover between "currently popular and loved British comedian in the US updates, thirst, and accoutrements" and "BBC show that went so off the rails that people now like to pretend Andrew Scott's breakout role was the Hot Priest in Fleabag" is limited, but weirdly, returning to Sherlock was one of the few things that was keeping my brain somewhat grounded and whirring during Work Hell.

We're in uncharted territory here. You're gonna learn a bit about the things I do when I'm not tracking John Oliver obsessively. I am nervous about this but hey, I'm guessing most of you knew I don't solely live and breathe John Oliver. (I know. I have multitudes. This is a shocking revelation. Please take time to process it.)

Firstly, a content note - there's going to be discussion about queerbaiting and queercoding villains, and the beginning of this goes into some of James Somerton's absolutely disgusting claims about the AIDS crisis. This post will only be focused on Season One, as that's all I've finished at this point.

Let's go.

(above image sourced from Writing Tips and Memes)

My sudden re-emergent hyperfixation started because of the hbomberguy takedown of James Somerton, weirdly. I don't follow many YouTubers - I like Bright Sun Films because he goes urban exploring, something I've always wanted to do but have never managed to make happen, and also Todd in the Shadows, whose Trainwreckords series is very well-done and expertly researched. Seeing that name, you might know where this is going. Todd dropped a video about James Somerton, who I had never fucking heard of and now wish I'd known about before, so I could scream bloody murder about what an absolute fuckwad he is.

(I don't want to get too in the weeds here, but the things James asserted about WWII, Nazis, and the AIDS crisis are so vehemently offensive that I'm still struggling with them. Claiming that only boring gays survived the AIDS crisis in particular is so vile that I have gotten anger flashes thinking about it almost daily since hearing it.)

Todd recommended watching all four hours of the hbomberguy plagiarism video, and I ran that in the background while working about two weeks ago. Eventually I had to stop doing that because the plagiarism revelations were so distracting and shocking. Todd's video was even more of a goddamn mindfuck, and even the smaller, less offensive things have taken up far too much space in my brain. Californians, does anyone at all deify Bob Iger??? Like... what the goddamn fuck??? Bob Iger????

After watching one hbomberguy video, the algorithm did its thing, and gave me a video called "Sherlock is Garbage and Here's Why". Posting it here for posterity:

Because my brain works in mysterious ways (-cough-ADHD-cough-), watching this... made me want to rewatch Sherlock.

I initially saw Sherlock for the first time thanks to someone I met in my last year of college, 2012. At the time, Michael (a nickname) was my neighbor in the dorms; over the past ten years, she's become one of my closest friends and a true rock in my life. One of the first things we bonded over that I introduced her to was the San Francisco Giants and the ghost I will always be chasing, Tim Lincecum; one of the first things we bonded over that she introduced me to was BBC Sherlock. The show was in the early months of its extended hiatus after Season Two, at the height of its fandom, and we were both completely obsessed. I read all the Doyle stories, took in a truly wild amount of fanfiction, wrote a not-very-popular AU fic, became part of a strange inter-dorm ARG based on Sherlock orchestrated by Michael... it consumed a huge part of our lives.

When Season 3 dropped, I almost stopped watching after "The Empty Hearse". I don't want to get into why it offended me so much before we get to a Season 3 post, but just know my enthusiasm severely dampened there. The rest of Season 3 I think of with blase emotions, especially the ending, which I found just dumb, save one part of it. I recall going to see The Abominable Bride in theatres with my mom (and maybe Michael?), and I think I liked it fine - aside, again, from the ending. But I had no interest in a Season Four, and when it dropped, Michael's long rambling phone calls describing the absolute shitstorm of a plot cemented that I was never going to watch it again.

Until now.

I definitely don't think the hbomberguy video is perfect. His insistence that Doyle canon never had Holmes pull answers to cases out of his ass is... something, lol, as is his opinion that changing the solution to certain puzzles in A Study in Pink disrespects the original canon. (Bro, these stories have been retold a bajillion times, they need to mix it up to keep it interesting.) But he put a finger on something that I'd wrestled with regarding Sherlock for a long time - that the show's writing often teased something big and new and conclusive in the horizon, but almost never delivered. That wasn't an issue in early days when there was less invested in an increasingly convoluted mythic story, or when they weren't fully blowing off the resolutions to cliffhangers, but the flaw in writing a story where you promise something huge on the horizon and never deliver should be obvious.

The first season doesn't trade much in that idea, and going back to it was something I found exceptionally enjoyable!

Before I watched:

I remembered bits and pieces of "A Study in Pink" and the whole plot in summary.

I truly didn't remember anything about "The Blind Banker" except that I found it fairly 'yellow peril'-y when I saw it in 2012.

I mixed up huge chunks of Season Two's "A Scandal in Belgravia" with "The Great Game" in my head and somehow forgot the main plot thrust was Moriarty kidnapping people and strapping bombs to them.

I genuinely forgot Sebastian Moran was a character basically hallucinated into existence by the fandom and didn't appear in the show at all until a brief appearance in Season Three.

In a way, it was like I was watching the show for the first time all over again. My partner also watched the first season with me, and it was interesting to get his thoughts on the show as we watched.

To start, his favorite character is Mycroft. Watching Season One, I had to agree that Mycroft has a depth of character that I'd forgotten about. Mark Gatiss plays him perfectly, aloof and smarter than you but unsure of how to deal with his natural feelings of concern and fear for his oft-spiraling, danger-seeking younger brother - and how those feelings magnify with the influence of extreme danger-seeker (at least in this season) John Watson. The show wants you to believe so badly that he's Moriarty in "A Study in Pink", which I don't think works even if you know he isn't Moriarty - there's a warmth to Gatiss' Mycroft that, even while he's doing incredibly ominous things like shutting off all cameras in a busy intersection, still comes through.

My favorite character is Moriarty. I haven't mentioned this very much here, because why would I, but my favorite character type in media is "theatrical abject shithead". It's why I cosplay Bakugo from My Hero Academia and loved everything about Akechi in Persona 5. Hell when I was a kid, I told teachers that when I grew up, I wanted to join Team Rocket. I love the theatrical shitheads. And boy, is Moriarty some sort of theatrical shithead. I don't DISAGREE with hbomberguy pointing out that, as written, Moriarty is a complete mess of a character, a queer-coded literal terrorist with no motivations besides "I did that because I'M CRAAAAZY!"... but he's my queer-coded literal terrorist, ok? I could write a whole paper on all the harmful stereotypes inhabiting this version of Moriarty... but I can't deny that the flamboyance and violence pulsing just beneath the surface of Andrew Scott's performance was the beating heart of that show for me. Sure, Sherlock and John, at least early on, were a compelling duo, but the show was at its best with Moriarty pulling strings for inexplicable reasons in the background. I love him.

(An aside: watching Sherlock made me remember how hilarious it was to see basically every major actor from the show in one of my favorite movies of all time, 1917, to the point that I actually kinda laughed in the theatre thinking about it.)

The entirety of the first season also is more devoted to actual crime-solving and detective work than I remembered the show being. I think that works strongly in its favor, and as I recall things from later seasons, drifting from that element definitely hampers the show greatly. In particular, while the lazy and uncomfortable Orientalism of "The Blind Banker" is still incredibly glaring, the actual mystery at the core of it is very excitingly tracked and easily followed while watching. The fact that John is treated like an equal (mostly) throughout only enhances my thoughts on that. "The Great Game" is a little more slapdash (and hurt by the fact that the entire Vermeer section would be solvable with a smartphone nowadays), but you can still make connections mentally with most of the cases and deduction/investigation is being shown logically. (hbomberguy cites the Golem as a problematic logical leap akin to some of Season Two's dumbest, and I can't agree. It's a reasonable suspension of disbelief to assume Sherlock knows about assassins and is followed by some more sensible investigation and inspection of the Golem's victim. The sequence of Sherlock fighting the Golem, however, is very, very silly.)

Related to that... the autopsy doctors on this show are fucking AWFUL at their jobs. Like straight-up negligently awful. How in the actual fuck did they not investigate the puncture marks on Connie Price's body? How did they not notice a highly distinctive heel tattoo on three recently-murdered corpses? Is Molly the only vaguely competent person in the mortuary? My partner and I were extremely amused that, while Lestrade and his police force are thankfully shown with much more intelligence than in other Holmes adaptations and BBC!Watson wouldn't think jam is a clue, the writers seem to have shunted the stupidity straight to the invisible autopsy doctors.

The first season also does a good job of making Sherlock seem like an overly intelligent if socially stunted human being, instead of the condescending prickish intellectual Ubermensch he ends up becoming as the show progresses. "A Study in Pink"'s ending being Sherlock throwing aside his deduction of the cabbie's killer when he realizes it's Watson, unconvincingly lying to Lestrade and insisting he's in shock before rejoining the other man and genuinely bonding with him, is remarkably compelling as fulfillment of a promise we get from Lestrade earlier in the episode - "Sherlock Holmes is a great man. One day he may even be a good one." My memory is admittedly faulty, but part of why "The Empty Hearse" turned me off so viscerally was Sherlock's (and to an extent, Mycroft's) insufferable growing smugness, particularly where explaining plans or mysteries to John. We get told often that Watson humanizes Sherlock and that the two have a strong bond throughout the series, but Sherlock gets much more dickish in general as the series progresses. One thing I do remember with stark clarity is that after being utterly chastised at a Christmas party in "A Scandal in Belgravia", Sherlock does visibly treat Molly MUCH better throughout the remainder of the show. So, uh, why did we lose that energy with the show's central pairing?

Speaking of the show's central pairing, the queerbaiting starts SO EARLY on this show. I want to make it clear that obviously the benefit of hindsight and knowledge of how the show ends really colors a lot about the Johnlock relationship now, and as a society, we're more aware of what queerbaiting is and what it looks like, which will obviously alter how I perceive these interactions now. I also want to make it clear that I never really shipped Johnlock outside of just kind of assuming that it would be canon because everyone seemed really convinced of it. (I was an absolute degenerate that shipped John with Moriarty. On top of enjoying theatrical disasters, I enjoy ships with an abundance of chaos and impossibility.) There's some biases at play here.

Even so, we are not far into the episode where John is protesting that obviously he needs a second bed in 221B to Mrs. Hudson, he's not gay! The scene in the restaurant has such an aggressively shippy energy to it (despite Watson's consistent denials) that I actively commented on it to my partner as it was happening, saying "the queerbaiting happens WAY SOONER than I thought!" It's distracting and has aged absolutely terribly. The worst by far is John quipping, after being removed from a bomb vest at a pool in "The Great Game", that people will talk because of Sherlock ripping his clothes off in a darkened swimming pool. Why is Watson's heterosexuality so fragile that he's thinking about gossip rags as he's actively recovering from a near-death experience?!

(Aside: I'm aware that last point is not as effective when you think about the fact that I shipped two characters whose sole canonical interaction was one man kidnapping and forcing the other into a bomb vest. In my defense, a) I love mess and b) John never quips about thinking people will talk because he got kidnapped.)

Moriarty's first appearance in "The Great Game" sees him as Molly's fake boyfriend slipping a phone number to Sherlock, which lead to my partner commenting about how distracting it also was, on top of the queerbaiting, that almost every single person on the show has some sort of deep metaphysical attraction to Sherlock. Those people aren't on the lighting and cinematography team for sure; Benedict Cumberbatch is lit ominously and sometimes demonically throughout the first season, highlighting his antihero and brusque nature effectively. But many, many characters in the show - just in season one, Molly, Moriarty, multiple characters of the day, the Cabbie, and John - are all drawn to Sherlock and his very special brain and his very sharp cheekbones. Signs of a big future problem come through in this way, where the show starts sidelining Watson as our central figure and puts Sherlock squarely at the center of everyone's universe and makes lesbians fall in love with him.

(My partner also laughed pretty hard at how obvious Moriarty's pratfalls were as Molly's boyfriend, noting that the show was pretty bad at hiding who Moriarty was every time it came up.)

Some of the seeds of Sherlock's destruction are sown in this first season, obviously. The big one I haven't touched on is the ending cliffhanger itself. Moriarty has John and Sherlock trapped in the pool, tens of sniper sights trained on them, and says that he can't let them escape. Amazing cliffhanger here! It is not fulfilled on at all, but because Andrew Scott can carry anything on his back (including Spectre, which I cannot start talking about because we'll be here all day), the scene doesn't feel like a total waste and makes you want to hang on to find out what happens later.

But there was so much here that was delightful. All the acting is uniformly excellent, and the overt physical tics that come to define Sherlock's mind palace and mental prowess being showcased are barely evident here. The actual detective work, like I said earlier, is really involving! I don't feel like I figured out the solutions for the mysteries I couldn't recall the answers for too easily and thought Sherlock's deductive reason largely followed and wasn't too obscure. I'm still such a sucker for the show's style - that opening credits sequence is so perfectly put together, the text messages that interact with the scene and at the time made this show feel so fresh and modern to me, filming the character's faces in taxis through panes of glass and obscuring material in "A Study in Pink" to give everything an obfuscating sheen... give me all of it.

The music, too, was something I'd forgotten about and truly ended up adoring. Taskmaster (and The Horne Section's score for it) really owes a debt to Michael Price and David Arnold. So much of Sherlock's score could probably be dropped straight into a Taskmaster episode and I would have to think pretty hard to notice a difference in the show's usual musical palette. I've been eyeballing the vinyl on eBay, to give you an idea of how much I love this score. "The Game is On" is a perfect piece of music, clockwork spinning noises emphasizing the jauntiness of Sherlock as he drags Watson on his latest case before sliding into the more subdued, vaguely ominous thrum of its second movement descending into the madness of the third part, violins shrieking as the action reaches its apex.

Normally, with such a degree of pleasant surprise, I'd be eager to move forward to Season Two. Unfortunately, I know the first episode of Season Two is... a doozy. To say the least. A doozy that may get its own essay because of how doozy-ish it is.

In any case, I ended up really enjoying going back to Season One of Sherlock! Super down to talk further about the show, future write-ups, and my horrible taste in fictional ships and men - shoot me a message, reply to this post, wherever, I'll be here! <3

#not john oliver #bbc sherlock #sherlock bbc #Youtube #too long didn't read - the lee lastweeksshirttonight story #hbomberguy #todd in the shadows #fuck james somerton #3k words on a hyperfixation

[genericpuff]

a shapeshifting time traveler and his apprentice who works as a minimum wage barista get pissed because their perfect speedrun keeps getting ruined by two teenagers with a kill count

they're about to run attempt 9999 and the barista is terrified that his boss is about to end up in some Y2K situation

the time traveler is very old and really does not care for the pop culture references from his apprentice whose strongest skill is creating latte art

they don't even get the bragging rights of being the main characters but still have to do the job of the main characters because the actual main characters are too involved in their love/hate relationship to be any good at saving the world

this is time gate.

---------

OKAY BUT HONESTLY I've been kind of stressing over making this post not because I didn't want to follow through on that poll I hosted, but also just because like... it's original work! And it's original work that I've been doing for over a decade in relative obscurity. So it's a little nerve-wracking to be like "Hey guys! Go read this comic that I started drawing nearly a decade ago! It really shows!" especially when I'm doing it from an alt account (i.e. this one) that people know me for being relatively confident on. It's like being that "one kid" in show & tell with their Pokemon cards all over again 🤣 I kept trying to come up with some kind of post that would "justify" me posting about it all, but nothing felt "good enough" so I finally went back to this draft about Springlock and decided to use that as the icebreaker. It's now or never.

Time Gate is a dark fantasy series I've been working on since about 2007/2008ish. It's existed on the Internet in multiple forms, starting as a Zelda fanfic online in 2009 and then dropping all the Zelda stuff and turning into an original comic series in 2014. Since then its first installment, Reaper, finished in 2021, two hours before the 'untimely' death of Betty White that totally wasn't the fault of my main character who can predict people's deaths. Reaper's completed narration of the beginning of [loop: 9998] clocks in at over 2,000 pages.

Now I'm working on Time Gate: [AFTERBIRTH] which is a direct continuation of Reaper and is drawn in the more vertical webtoon style. Yes, the choice of title is intentional, funnily enough the episode featuring my main character bursting out of a tub of her own blood and bodily fluids only got removed by Webtoons for having "too much boob curve". So I covered it up with more blood and that got Webtoons' seal of approval. Webtoons is... weird.

This series is a love letter to all those "weird kids" who grew up wondering why they got dopamine rushes off of arguments and fights or getting in over their heads trying to grow up too fast. It's a love letter to the people who love hyper-analyzing convoluted and way-too-long narratives with overpowered characters who could only exist within the limitless bounds of the imagination.

But most of all, it's a love letter to the part of me that still adores dumb over-the-top weeb shit.

That being said, this piece of work is not intended to provide comfort, but rather, catharsis. Don't read it looking for any kind of guidance on life or interpersonal relationships. Its story and its characters are only concerned with what comes after - when the lights have gone out and the hourglass has run empty.

This series contains blood/gore and fantasy violence, and depicts adult topics such as post-traumatic stress disorder through a fictional lens. It is not intended for anyone under the age of 18+.

I have a dedicated Time Gate blog, so you might see some reblogs here every now and then as I start to use it more (though I'm currently resting through a hiatus, LORE | REKINDLED came around at the perfect time for me to have something new to work on).

As you may have guessed, with Reaper originally launching in 2014 (when I was literally 18) the comic has... not aged gracefully, at least in my opinion, and could use some reworking, at least the first few volumes (I'm still pretty happy with the stuff that came out around the 2019-2021 mark after I took a nearly 2 year hiatus).

Of course, I can't stop y'all from looking it up and reading it (the original version will still be canon even if it's aged so help yourself) but just know there's a dedicated redraw and rewrite on the way <3

And if it's not your cup of tea, that's fine! It's a completely different story with different goals from Rekindled. The main characters aren't saints and they're in a relationship I definitely wouldn't recommend anyone be in LMAO

That being said, don't be surprised if you hear the subtle heartbeat of Time Gate underneath the floorboards of Rekindled~

#bedtime for me now #this is gonna keep me awake all night #oh god i'm so exposed- #ask me anything #anon ama #anon ask me anything #time gate #time gate comic #original story #original characters #webcomic #i'm totally gonna get bullied for this #/hj

[13ghostlytitties]

The Heart of a Hero is returning once more!

Today marks the 5-year anniversary of the premiere of HoaH, and is fairly close to the 3.5 year anniversary of its last official upload. Well, the wait is over. It’s time for me to resurrect this series and eventually bring it to its end (not that it left off anywhere close to ending 😉).

Since it’s been a while, I’ve put together a recap of the story so far that I’ll post at some point here. It’s not complete, I had to cut out some of the newer chapters since it just became a play-by-play synopsis that doubled the total word count, but hey, having to reread 5-10 chapters is better than rereading 150.

The tentative return date will be this time next month as I work on creating a backlog of chapters. If I need to push it back, I’ll let you know. As for other questions I’m sure some of you have, check below the cut. For those who don’t care, see you in a month, hopefully.

So, some questions I’m sure some of you are asking:

1: where have you been? And why did you stop?

I’m not gonna go into details since I’m not that kinda person, but overall, just been living life, dude. I originally began my unexpected hiatus when college was kicking my ass and expected to get right back to things, but some stuff happened, and by the time I had dealt with it, it was Spring of 2020. You can guess what stopped me up then lol. But yeah, things just got away from me and eventually, I didn’t have the time or energy to dedicate to diving headfirst back into this outside of unconnected one-off stuff like those Bang fics. There’s other facets too, of course, the biggest one being a general disinterest in the source material. I stopped reading MHA around the villains arc (though I’ve kept up a bit in terms of big stuff like the traitor reveal), so I lacked that interest to pull me back into this world. Where I left off in the story, in the middle of a complicated arc full of OCs and big fights and stuff, was also a hurdle to getting back into things. But I’m here now, I’m working on my backlog, and I’m gonna commit. If you guys are excited about my return, spread the word and lemme hear it so I can keep this motivation 🤟

2: Is A New Era coming back too?

And now for the other shoe to drop. It is not. Im very sorry, especially to those whose OCs I included, but it’s just not feasible. Every time I considered it or tried it, the whole return to the main story was stopped up with it. Anyone who’s interested in continuing it themselves in some way shape or form, you have my permission in terms of the general idea, the OC kids I came up with, the places that canon characters are in it, etc. As for other people’s OCs, I’d check with their creators. One again, very sorry, but it’s just not doable.

3: What will this return look like? How often are chapters gonna drop?

Still working out the specifics, but my idea for now is to drop 2 chapters a week. If I need to go on hiatus, I’ll announce as much and plan the placement of it much better so that I don’t stop in the middle of an arc. That way, the hiatus will only be a month instead of years lol. The schedule may change over time, but I’ll keep everyone informed as I move ahead with it

4: a lot has happened in the manga and anime and movies since you stopped. Will these things be worked into the series?

Nope. I stopped reading and probably won’t start again until it’s over and done with. More than that, I’ve been sitting on these plans for a couple years now and don’t feel like changing them much. Besides, this story has had a long, rich history of shitting in the soup of the canon story, so I’ll just continue doing my own thing

5: are you still as epic and cool and funny as in the past?

Don’t ask questions you already know the answers to. I never was 😎

#the heart of a hero #class 1b #mha #bnha #a new era #monoma neito #kendou itsuka #tetsutetsu tetsutetsu #ibara shiozaki #pony tsunotori #yui kodai #awase yousetsu #setsuna tokage #hiryu rin #reiko yanagi #juzo honenuki #shihai kuroiro #togaru kamakiri #jurota shishida #kinoko komori #nirengeki shoda #sen kaibara #kosei tsuburaba #kojiro bondo #manga fukidashi #vlad king #hitoshi shinsou #mei hatsume

[shark-myths]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Thank you so much for the tag ((and drag)) @carbonbased000! this was very fun and thoughtful to do.

who is writing things right now? i never remember. i will tag a wide and perhaps not terribly relevant range of: @toorational @just-about-nothing @27-royal-teas @leyley09 @alienfuckeronmain @stereostatic @setting-in-a-honeymoon and anyone else so inclined!

++

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

65

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

968,103, but as i’ve said before, i have orphaned a lotta fic as well

3. What fandoms do you write for?

pretty much just Fall Out Boy, but i will occasionally dabble in something random! this includes tony stark femslash (not sorry, will not apologize), cobra kai, and anything about girls or characters who could compellingly be made into girls.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

The Difference Between Real Love and the Love on TV

Stranger Danger

Boys Next Door / Assholes

From Russia With Love (this is one of those random sidesteps, a MCU femslash epistolary)

Jet Black Crow

(As an aside, it is so wild to me that older fics have so many more kudos than newer ones—you can really tell that fob went 5 years between albums! imo this is NOT a list of my best fic.)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

for years, I responded to every single one! then at some point i fell behind because of my high standards for trying to put the same thought and effort into my responses as all you lovely people put into the comments, then i became overwhelmed, then i stopped. I AM SO SORRY IF I OWE YOU RETURN COMMENTS, i read them and i treasured them and you are a huge part of the reason i keep writing. love u all!!!

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I only write happy endings, man! I stopped writing tragedies a long time ago. My angstiest fics are red and unafraid of living and In Every Universe. the end of Made One Way (Cobra Kai) is ambiguous and potentially brutal, depending on how you take it.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

um, every single other one! I’m a big fan of the gory fairy tale ending of The Boys Time Can’t Capture, and transmuting the hiatus into an act of mutual care and love in Sell Out Girl meant so much to me.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

not since my first fandom and god, don’t

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

yes, a bit, could probably write a little less about feelings and a little more about feelings if u know what i mean. I’m super into sex as a person so i almost never write about intense romantic connections without bringing smut into it somehow; they feel really tightly linked for me, and i think i also crave media with HOT and INTIMATE connections between queer people. In terms of kind, i guess i’d have to say it’s largely rushed vanilla emotion-and-orgasm driven scenes. not a very flattering oeuvre i've created here.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

mash-ups are my favorite thing to do! I especially like ripping off movie and fairy tale plots and making them stranger, or else taking a really specific constrained timeline from someone’s life or a piece of media and transforming it somehow. best sandbox ever. my craziest one is probably the coyote ugly / beauty in the beast peterick fic, Wolves Dressed As Wolves. and i love this type of transformation in everything, whether it's the weirdo gender shit i just learned duchamp was doing or katherine addison's destructively beautiful 'sherlock holmes except there're ANGELS' novel or the buenos aires re-imagining version of vivaldi's four seasons by piazzolla, my life and taste keeps taking me into the various ways we fold and refract and remake the same experiences over and over again through different lenses or angles or selves. to quote some author whose identity i forgot years ago, though the quote remains: "there are no new stories." all art is iterative, and the most interesting thing we can do as creators is deviate in new, unexpected ways.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

yeah, a million years ago on deviantart

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

yes! I have had a few translations and a podfic. I love it when people want to interact with my stories in their own way, all interpretations are welcome.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

one day i hope to be domesticated enough that @carbonbased000 can write with me. I used to co-write by passing the laptop back and forth with my bestie in high school; we wrote self-insert x-men fanfiction based on the comic books in like 2004 and it was an absolute blast; but generally i am considered impossible to work with, by both myself and others.

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

i feel completely unqualified to answer this question. i have been driven insane by any number of pairings in my life. when i was younger, i was more interested in internalized homophobia themes in ships, because that's where WE were culturally in the early 2000s and where i was in relationship to myself, and i think each change and growth and greater empowerment and self-possession in my own life is mirrored in what i am interested in. i feel the most drawn in by dynamics between people that are creative and give me a new way to access and explore interesting ideas and themes; i’m a real sucker for shared art products and touring bands as unique and agonizing ways to connect people. there are so many different ways to express that someone is your soulmate and you'll never convince me throwing away all trappings of a traditional life in order to rove the earth and make art with your friends isn't one of them.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

do you not just block out your WIPs from your mind so that you can live in moment-to-moment freedom?? I am a finisher in general, i have a few peterick drafts lurking around in my gdocs but if they remain untouched, it’s generally because there are only a couple thousand words to them and i’m not very excited about the possibilities of the fic. there is a sequel to a meticulously historically accurate pirate fic i wrote long ago called Providence, i got to about 30k and then lost all of my extremely painstaking notes and research in a software update. I’m still very interested in and excited by the idea, but i lost the notes and felt too traumatized to continue with the project genuinely a decade ago, so the idea that i will return and finish the fic seems fairly unlikely. Providence is one of my greatest pieces of writing ever, though, so hope springs eternal, i guess!

16. What are your writing strengths?

lyrical prose and conveying humor via unusual sentence construction. i was recently told i write arguments well and feel tough as a result, like, watch out! you don’t want to fight me!

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

i am lazy and easily distractible, i don’t plot in advance, i barely edit because i get really rigid and have trouble seeing any other way to say something than how i’ve already said it, i have an unwillingness to delete and rewrite even when that’s the only way forward (see: my eternally 90% finished age swap peterick au), i use up all my emotional energy elsewhere and then neglect my craft for weeks at a time. 

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

sometimes i’ll use pet names in another language if it makes sense for the character, but i avoid this in general as i’m not fluent in anything other than english. I would, have, and do sound like a duolingo lesson.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

afi bandom, when we used to call it slash, when i thought i had invented it with my friend at summer camp, when i was 13 and sent her kidfic stories i wrote out by hand in pink envelopes.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

genuinely i almost always write things i personally want to read, so i love them all! except the fucking fixed stars of heaven, everyone knows that fic tortured me to within an inch of my sanity. My most personal and personally meaningful fic is Girl Out Boy. i have a tattoo of it on my arm.

#writing #fic #tags #about me #a humble shark #thank you so much love #this was so fun

[noxsoulmate]

Fic Rec FridaySunday Fun

Thank you for the tag, @detective-giggles and @carlos-in-glasses 🥰 noticed that I haven't read some of your fics yet and I'll make sure to correct that asap 😊

So wanted to get some hiatus rec lists going and encourage some self-promo in my friends so how about sharing your top fics no matter how big or small - give us the links to your wonderful words with the Most hits/Most kudos/Most comments/Most bookmarks /Most words/Least words

Some of mine will double or even tripple up, so for those I went further down the list...

Most Hits: I Heard You've Been Missing Me - When Alex makes an unexpected reappearance in TK’s life, he doesn’t know how to face that storm. Thankfully, he’s not alone in this. Not only does he have Carlos by his side to help him navigate through it – but a whole armada of friends who all come to his rescue. || I truly love how many people love this fic. It was one of my earlier ones in this fandom and basically just written for my own guilty pleasure of "revenge" fics on Alex - it's good to see that so many people seem to agree with me 😏

Most Kudos: Again, I Heard You've Been Missing Me, which is actually my first Lone Star fic to reach over 1000 kudos 🥰

Second Most Kudos: Everywhere I'm Looking Now, I'm Surrounded by Your Embrace - When the fire fam won’t stop teasing TK about his sleeping habits, Carlos has to come to his rescue. || I'll admit that this one surprised me - not because I don't like this fic but more because I would've thought other fics to be "higher". But it seems we all love our protective Carlos and sleepy koala TK 🥰

Most Comments: PS: I still love you, too - An alternative rendition of how TK and Carlos may have gotten back together. || A personal favorite of mine, so I'm truly happy to see it so high up.

Most Bookmarks: Once again, I Heard You've Been Missing Me, followed by Everywhere I'm Looking Now, I'm Surrounded by Your Embrace

Third Most Bookmarks: This Love is Ours, it’s Everything - After two years without Pride Parade, Austin’s first responders are hyped to finally have it back – especially with the generous surprise their Captains have for them. Carlos was looking forward to a great day, maybe some stolen kisses and lots of flirting with TK, even though they’re on the clock – it’s Pride, after all. Little did he expect to have to fend off some unwanted attention from a stranger… || Another fic featuring Alex getting what he deserves, even if this is slightly different. Also, I truly love writing about the Pride Parade!

Most Words: PS: I still love you, too with 22770 words

Second Most Words: Valentine’s Match with 16330 words - Meet cutes are only meant for rom coms, right? So why is it that TK has a total of four of them with the same stranger in just one day? Besides, Valentine’s weekend is certainly not the right time for him to have his head in cloud nine – not when the annual Baseball game between Fire and Police is on the line. Apparently, Police hasn't lost in years thanks to their pitcher. But now Fire has TK on their team – a paramedic who had a chance to play in the major leagues… || I enjoyed writing this fic so, so much! And I learned a lot about Baseball thanks to it 😂

Least Words: Of Teddy Bears and Boyfriends with 490 words - The 126 spends a day at the fair – and TK isn’t the only one whose boyfriend has the ability to win him a teddy bear. || Just a sweet little entry for @flufftober

I'm super late for this so I guess you've all already done it, but just in case, tagging some of you: @heartstringsduet, @catanisspicy, @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut, @bonheur-cafe, @firstprince-history-huh, @rangergurlgleek1211, @actuallysara, @wtfuckevenknows, @lightningboltreader, @meditating-honey-badger, @mangacat201

#tarlos #911 lone star #noxy writes #fic rec friday #thanks for tagging me

[ronearoundblindly]

The Dignity of His Choice (17)

Identity, Part Two (see previous or series)

Summary: Tony, Pepper, Nat, and Bucky brief you and Steve on the group that caused this mess.

Warnings for coarse language and description of an evil plot (including kidnapping and torture, threats to women and children), not graphic. Quite a lot of arguing (and Tony's shit).

Before we get started though, I'd just like to apologize for this part taking so freaking long to come out. Never intended for there to be a three-week hiatus in the midst of healing the angst, so thank you to those hanging in there. I appreciate it! And now for FIC--

You take it back. Maybe you don’t want to know because it’s bleak even when Tony tries to sell it as good news. Well, not good news, but a win. Actually, Tony seems twitchy while he rattles off details of the raid. The pictures on his projector look like a modern, dystopian Inquisition facility—all the equipment and room to keep a person clinically alive but little else. More terrifying still is how few people needed to be on the premises to run the damn thing. 

Four victims were saved from active holding. Another seven kidnappings were planned. No ransoms. No one wants money for them…for you; they want control of someone else, someone powerful, and thus, influence over thousands of people. Possibly more.

“You were one of the seven, mind you, but your file was marked ‘declined.’”

“That’s one way to put it,” you mutter.

“And then of the other six…” Tony drops two tiny objects onto the cluttered coffee table. “Recognize those?”

You and Steve pick up one each.

“The tracker thing from my necklace?”

“Yeah, want to guess where I found the second?”

Steve looks back up at Tony, silent.

“Star-Spangler,” he turns to you.

“I don’t know…”

“No, in Star-Spangler.” Tony purses his lips while his chest goes completely rigid. “Inside the pony keychain from Morgan’s book bag. They were tracking my daughter—“ his glare bores into the top of Steve’s lowered head “—could have taken her at any time, and I wouldn’t have known a damn thing about—“

Pepper touches Tony’s tense arm. “Luckily, Tony has been very involved, very close to Morgan since…you…since Steve,” she ends in a whisper, a weak smile. 

“If you had told me, I could have protected my kid—“

Natasha cuts him off this time. “Hold up. We had it under control. We made sure there were no movements to get at—“

“Don’t think I don’t see that you lied to me again,” Tony snaps at Bucky.

That’s not fair, and you know it. “Back off, Tony,” you snap. “He only did what Steve asked him to.”

“Whose side are you on?”

“She’s right,” Nat mutters.

“Yeah.” She can’t get off that easy though. “No one expects Barnes to say no to Steve, but you--“ your finger juts out toward Nat “—should have known better. How could you not tell Tony? He could have helped. This shit wouldn’t have lasted three GODDAMN months—“

Steve jumps up just as Natasha opens her mouth and steps forward.

“This is why she’s my favorite,” Tony whispers to Pepper who tries to help Steve wrangle you two.

Bucky lounges silently in the rocker, eyes wide.

“Enough,” Steve bellows. “It’s my fault. It was my choice.”

“Shut it, martyr,” Tony spits. “You’re not special. You’re selfish. We did this to each other. We all kept her in the dark. We all thought we could handle this on our own. We all thought our way was best—except, frankly, my way would have—“

“Tony,” you and Pep warn simultaneously.

He puts his hands up, huffing, and glares at Steve again. Eventually, Tony lowers his hands as slowly as Steve lowers himself back onto the couch.

Natasha’s eyes scan everyone while she crosses her arms over her chest. “So…next steps. Now that the Keepers are scattered—“

Your head whips up with Steve’s.

“We weren’t gonna,” Tony whines, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Yes, uh, the organization loosely called themselves…Keepers.”

“Fuck off,” you groan.

Steve growls. “What she said.”

Tony’s brows raise high. “I wholeheartedly agree. See, we’re on the same side. Look at us. Fuckin’ team-ing again.” His smug expression is not reciprocated, so he turns to Pep. “Honey, we’re so adult right now, it’s crazy, like he didn’t put our kid at risk—”

“We aren’t calling them Kee—that, are we?” Bucky sits up and scoots to the edge of the rocker’s seat.

“Right, all in favor of never repeating that one unless absolutely necessary,” Tony asks, clearing his throat.

The entire room choruses ‘yes.’

“Great. I think I can keep that out of the press.”

The glares are sharp and biting.

“Ok… I—I see what I did wrong there. That’s on me.”

Natasha yanks the tablet from Tony’s lax hand and continues his projected presentation. “If—and that’s an actual if because this may have been a centralized facility, but the operation is extensive—so if we got enough of them to scare the rest off and abandon the cause, then we won’t be hearing about the…the—“ she stalls.

Tony’s still pondering away. “They aren’t technically Ten Rings or Hydra or any of those. This thing runs like the shadiest business I’ve…ever seen…”

“I’m voting for ‘the Assholes,’” you offer with a hand raised.

Bucky points at you in agreement, a proud, thin frown tugging at his lips.

“Seconded,” Pepper, of all people, gets out before Tony. Her husband is stunned.

“I have never been third in my life.“

“Either way,” Steve pipes in, “what about Costa?”

“The Faceless Terror?” Tony’s brows raise excitedly.

Bucky snorts while you roll your eyes hard.

“Costa,” Steve says again firmly. “How was he able to go undetected for so long? He’s been here years, and he referenced being part of this organization for at least that long.”

“Ramone, or I guess we could say ‘the Fisherman,’ was—“ Nat jumps in “—and this is a technical term—so fucking average that he would tick exactly none of the boxes for candidates who could do this…or might do this… considering he did.”

Irritation visibly flares in Steve. He’s taken most of this in stride because it justifies his original fear, but Costa made it too personal. He got too close. “How is that possible?”

Nat remains calm and matter-of-fact. “He missed days. He didn’t make some promotions. He didn’t try to befriend us directly. He didn’t stand out, but he wasn’t a recluse—“

“One hot day and I’d have known,” Bucky grumbles, rubbing at his upper arm.

“My god, he killed three of his own cohorts,” Nat argues, “and Tony gave him a prize.”

Stark’s not happy about being called out. “They—the Assholes, I mean—they had programs. Programs that look a hell of a lot like Zola’s algorithm. It stands to reason if Hydra could use it to predict people’s behavior, they could calculate behavior to avoid suspicion.”

Just for fun, because he’s said over ten serious words in a row, Tony adds, “she’s up to two baddies now.” His attention lands on you as he exclaims, “wha'd’ya think of ‘Double Trouble?’”

“No,” Steve grumbles.

“What about Slapstick?”

You scoff. “I think I’m not due another nickname for at least a year.”

“Sad,” Tony frowns dramatically. “Missed opportunity.”

Why is it so easy to just fall into old habits with these people? It should be difficult, shouldn’t it? You were an alienated widow for the last quarter of this year, and you were never part of the team before this one conversation if this even counts.

Everyone in this room looked out for you though, the ones who knew, the ones who didn’t know, the ones who didn’t have to. They have been your team for a while, it seems, even if compartmentalized. All except Steve, that is, but he’s back now. Life can resume.

“Now for something a little more pleasant,” Pepper starts, her tone a smooth pressure on buzzing nerves. “We are ready to bring you back from the dead. Legally.”

Steve looks up to her beneath his shaggy hair, propping his jaw in one tense and giant hand.

“None of the paperwork has been officially filed, but it’s complete for when it’s time to announce you’re back.”

Pep smiles even though Steve doesn’t. Nat and Bucky eye each other across the coffee table. You’re very relieved you refused any army benefits.

Tony barely looks up before rambling, “and then symbolically, Wilson returns the shield, you shake some hands—“

“No.”

You grew too comfortable in all that banter, and Steve’s response blind-sides you like a punch to the gut. What did he say? The rest of the room is silent in confusion.

Bucky starts slowly. “Tony just means that Cap—“

“I know what he means,” Steve barks, not looking away from Tony. “I’m not taking it back. Sam is Captain America now.”

A bomb may as well have gone off in your apartment. Everyone except you is on their feet and yelling. You’re…well, you’re just…What?!?!

Finally, it’s Tony’s voice that rings loudest. “Then who are you supposed to be?”

You can’t seem to feel your legs, and your eyes won’t move from the coffee table. Between the two tiny black trackers, reflected on the glass surface, you see your husband hang his head.

He runs his hand through his hair and sighs. “Steve. I’m Steve, and I think it’s time to give it up, to pass on the mantle. Simple since he’s already been doing this for months.”

You’re frozen, completely numb, mind blank. It won’t process. You’re blinking. All autonomic function persists in your body, but that’s it. The ringing comes back to your ears, this time in a low, swimming bass. They keep fighting, but the words are garbled, gestures thrown your way without explanation.

Your head tilts slowly to the door as your mouth falls open.

“Can we do this another time?”

You said the words but don’t remember thinking them. You’re having trouble thinking of why you might have said them, but the group snips at each other while everyone leaves, Steve kept safe well away from the view of the hall. As you shut the door, your back turns to the wall and slides down, legs crumbling beneath you on the floor.

He’s there in an instant.

“Keeps,” Steve whispers, and it wakes you as if from a dream.

“Yeah?”

He looks at you expectantly, brow knotted in concern, but he doesn’t say anything else. Steve watches you breathe heavily.

You thought you were doing so well. Plot to kidnap you? Fine. Children threatened? Awful but happens. Disastrous nickname choice? Weird it wasn’t Tony’s pick. Traitor in your midst? Apparently, nothing new. But Steve? Steve Rogers giving up the mantle of Captain America? The man who put it to writing that he would not give that up even as he professed his love for you? You cannot wrap your head around it, so you try to think back. Maybe you missed something in all that information.

“Is it always like that?”

Steve props himself up on the wall beside you. “More or less,” he grunts. “That was…a lot, and I wish it had a better—“

“You can’t quit.” Your voice may be small but stops him all the same.

After a long, loud exhale, he wraps his hand over yours, not breaking the death grip you have on your knee. “If it gives me a real life with you, it’s worth it.”

“You won’t be happy.” Your vision blurs with escalating tears. “You—you’ll get bored and bitter and resent me.”

“Honey, I could never—“

“I’m serious, Steve. You can’t do nothing.”

He pries your hand free to bring it to his lips. “I won’t do nothing, love. I just won’t be Cap anymore.”

The view of those two photographs at the funeral presents in your mind: two different people, Cap and Steve. All you wanted was Steve back, and you got him. He’s telling you that Captain America can remain well and truly dead, and that should be fine because he wasn’t yours.

Steve Rogers is yours. He’s yours and right beside you, warm and brooding, stoic and naïve as ever. He’s real and he’s really home. Real enough to squeeze his hand in recognition. Real enough to rest your head on his shoulder. Real enough to pinch his side playfully.

“If the last few days taught us anything, it’s that you need a job, Sketch.”

“Artist then?” He kisses your hand again after jolting away. “Hey now,” he exclaims at your huffed laugh.

“I mean that you love to fight for the little guy, and you love to help people. You’re a strategist. I know you love art, but you know that wouldn’t be enough, not when I work here, too.” You never thought you’d have a conversation to convince Steve Rogers to stay with his family. “You know you can’t give them up,” you finish, weaving your fingers through his and letting them fall between your legs.

“I would for you,” he mumbles before planting a kiss on the crown of your head, his beard mussing strands of hair.

“That’s not what I want. I’ll get used to it—to all that—“ you wave behind you to the door “—I promise I will if you promise not to quit. That’s the kind of choice that got us into this mess.”

Stupid Steve Rogers, bless him. Because this is just that: a big, life-altering, knee-jerk reaction that he hasn’t thought all the way through. To his credit, the world—or his world, rather—used to be more black and white. It was easier to be Captain Morals when good and evil were differentiated by genocide. Perhaps it will become easier to deal in subtleties when he’s not dressed in a flag, too, but you know one thing for certain.

Steve Rogers is a hero. He can’t just disappear. He tried that, and you never let him go. He’s too important. You love him too much. The world isn’t ready to say goodbye, this year or any other, so you hold his hand, press closer in, and get ready to bring him back into the light.

“Ok, love,” he whispers again. “Whatever you want.”

[Next Part]

Thank you for reading! If you enjoyed this please consider liking, commenting, and/or reblogging. It makes my day and encourages me to churn out more content for you. 💋💋

@im-a-slut-for-fluff @whiskeytangofoxtrot555 @fangirl-swagg @georgeweaslysgirl @austynparksandpizza @bucky-fricking-barnes-reads @fallinallinmendes

#fools rush in #steve rogers #fanfic #steve rogers fic #steve x reader #steve rogers fanfiction #steve x you #series #steve rogers angst #angst #angst with a happy ending #captain america #captain america x reader #captain america x you #captain america fanfiction #the avengers #marvel mcu #mcu #marvel cinematic universe #steve rogers hurt/comfort #hurt/comfort #steve roger x reader

[unreadpoppy]

LET'S DO IT. Care to share some info about your OC? Or a Raph headcanon?

One of the 2 headcanons i have of Raph is that he has a breeding kink. Like i don't care that he is ALLEGEDLY bad at sex in canon, you cannot tell me that once he got his hands on that sweet sweet crown and conquered all 9 hells he wouldn't be like "damn i gotta make a legacy off my own" and just.... try to get as many people as possible pregnant. Would he raise the children? Probably not, but i do think he would be intent on having like a lineage of tieflings that can all the traced back to him

My other headcanon is that he likes going to the theater, to watch like an opera, a play or a ballet. He just seems to me like someone who would appreciate the arts.

As for my OC's, at this point is so many I'll just give a quick run down of some of them (important to note, they were/are my dnd characters, although i've only been able to play with 2 of them)(also you'll quickly notice i have a thing for tieflings).

Gwendolyn "Gwen" Gray is a tiefling warlock/sorcerer whose mom had made a deal with a devil in the past and resulted in Gwen being born. She was raised by her mom in the middle of the woods and she was always very creative and hyperactive, and she wanted to see the world. At some point she discovers the truth about her dad and she makes a deal with him so that she'll be able to leave her mom (basically like hey dad gimme some powers so i don't die while adventuring and i'll do whatever you want). She has a pseudodragon familiar named Pendragon. When I played with her, Gwen was known for making very questionable decisions and throwing caution to the wind, and also taking/buying stuff she didn't need. I've played with her for like a year and a half until me and the other players quit the campaign due to some issues and if i get the chance, i'll probably play with her again in the future if i'm able to.

Elizabeth Adawolf is a human blood hunter who grew up as the second oldest child of an important duke, but on the day of her wedding with another noble, the church caught on fire and she was the only one who made it out alive (which is why half of her face is covered in burn scars and she doesn't have sight in one eye). The person who saved her was a tiefling blood hunter named Kallista and Elizabeth ended up staying with the blood hunters, and becoming part of the order of the lycan. She and Kallista fell in love and they had plans of leaving one day but were found out and during a confrontation, Elizabeth had to flee while kallista almost died. Elizabeth also discovered that the fire wasn't a random accident and when the campagin begun, she was being hunter down by the same person who killed her family. She is the only character I currently play with so she got even more traumatized during the campaign. She's a leader and the champion of the sun goddess, even thought she didn't ask for either of those, she's very anxious and also she loves swords and beheading an assholes. Also, I have written like 3 fanfics involving her (is it a fanfic if it is your own character?).

Also, Elizabeth's campaign is on hiatus but it's cause the DM decided to do a smaller campagin in the same world but in another part of the continent and in that one I'm playing as Kallista(who is a barbarian).

Galatea von DeWilde is, you guessed it, a tiefling whose parents were nobles who had trouble conceiving so they were told by this witch to do a certain ritual and 9 months later, a tiefling was born (even though her dad is human and her mom is an elf). Even thought her parents loved her, she was ostracized by her grandmother and some other family members but she didn't care much. When she was 5, her parents managed to have another child, this one being a regular half-elf. Galatea loved her sister but it did hurt her that some people seemed to care more about the new baby then her and after hearing her grandma say some hurtful things about her, Galatea starts manifesting some magic and also this shadow guy (who she saw as an imaginary friend) starts talking to her. She kept both of those things to herself. Also, when she began to use magic, a black spot appeared on one of her arms, and the more she uses it, the more is grows and at this point, her whole hand up to her wrist is pitch black. Anyways, she eventually runs away from home when her sister tells her that she overheard their mother and grandmother talking about marrying Galatea to some random guy so she would be far away. I haven't been able to play with this character yet and at this point i doubt I will but oh well.

Nyx Lenoir was a tielfing born on a cold winter's night to human parents. They were a happy little family and she was a sorcerer like her mom. Because the place they lived was very hostile towards tieflings, her paretns tried to keep her hidden but one day they had to go to a nearby town and this man discovered that she had magic by accident. The following day her home gets invaded and she is separated from her parents and taken to this magic school that is really shitty but she makes some friends and a rival. Eventually, she drops out of the school and goes to live on her own, while also trying to figure out what happened to her parents. She is a sorcerer/divination wizard, she likes mapping the stars and because i wrote this character while i had a hyperfixation on bears, she studied bears for a long time. She has a familiar named Griffin, and she's infamous in my dnd group because her background is a 24 page document, out of which 17 pages are just writing (the rest are reference pics). Also, I haven't played with her yet bu the DM promised that he would begin the campagin next year.

And as a bonus, shout out to my first OC, Solana Starfury, who was a high elf necromancer, who came from a warrior family and was kicked out of her home cause she couldn't lift a sword to help herself. First dnd character I ever made and played with, her campagin ended abruptly due to the DM having some IRL problems. I miss her.

Anyways, I skipped physical appearences description because this answer is already way too long so feel free to ask away.

#ask answered #i am so sorry for this long ass post

[gothamghostwhispers]

Hello ooc introduction! Last updated 4/12/24

I’m Coolcat101s (that’s where I follow from) I’ve been rping on and off for over a decade now, but this is my first time rping in the dc community. My response speed and length varies but I’m online often. I’m primarily a mobile user.

Much like dc canon the ‘canonical’ (for lack of a better word) nature of any given story line is decided by vibes especially since this is a crossover friendly blog I figure this approach will help make things mesh best so if I ever have plot holes or contradict myself maybe that was a different continuity

Along that thought line while there are plots happening and time passing, because rping takes time I won’t say there’s like a set matching timeframe if that makes sense? comic time logic you know? Sometimes a day takes 3 panels and sometimes it’s 3 issues.

It can take people a while to reply I get that ^^”

Posts are in character unless otherwise specified, but some posts are meant to be things that happen in the “real world” the stylistic chooses should make these posts obvious but I like to practice writing with my ocs so expect those sometimes

-

I am okay with shipping/flirting with Artem I think it’s fun ^^ but be aware that they are pretty oblivious to many things

I’m okay with violence in rp but I’d like a conversation before we do anything that would need a content warning

Same with more suggestive content, conversions first, probably using a red/yellow/green check in system in the tags

Minors can interact but be mindful! Muse and mun are the same age (You should really be mindful anytime youre in a mixed age group but that is sometimes forgotten by many in online spaces) I tend to keep things pg 13 and anything not would be tagged as ‘suggestive’. Any minors caught interacting with anything tagged as suggestive will get one warning in case they didn’t read this post but after that you will be blocked if it happens again

Im crossover friendly but only for content that I know if I don’t know it Artem will act confused and will wrap it up to multidimensional shenanigans causing worlds to temporarily touch or whatnot. ( known crossovers that I’m chill with: Danny Phantom, Miraculous Ladybug I’ll add more as I come across them I guess)

Artem was a self insert at one point but they became their own thing after rotating them in different scenarios so now they’re their own oc

Ongoing arc(s):

Power suppression arc (hiatus kinda, abduction interrupted so might be done)

Magic experiments

Completed arc: abduction arc

Bread boy arc

-4’11 blue eyes, hair is naturally brown but they keep it blue

-birthday June 11th (whatever year makes their age match mine in whatever continuity also their chart isn’t mathematically possible but it’s what makes sense for them)

-they’re agender and pan/demisexual, also polyamorous in theory but single in practice

They have a boyfriend

-went to college on a full Wayne scholarship, they have a bachelors in English with a minor in folklore

-job hops between restaurant and goon positions

-the first goon they ever worked for was calendar man when they were 17 and they currently work under riddler, scarecrow, and ivy

-they get robbed a lot because they have a resting smile and generally give the vibe of an easy mark when not hanging out with scary people (subsequently they hang out with scary people often)

-lives in a building owned by Red Hood but it’s debatable if they know that

-Forcibly outed as a meta publicly during the abduction arc

Artem also has an easy time learning instruments and perfect pitch but they don’t equate those to a meta ability (it is linked to their power though)

-has a cat and an aloe plant

-soft spot for kids

-Artem is a witch but doesn’t have much time to study, does small spells though

-grew up going to an anti meta church/cult

-Joker killed their mom in front of them when they were 16, they aren’t really the killing type when at all possible so they don’t seek vengeance but they avoid him at all costs and will not work with him

— any joker rper, I’m cool with rping but it would be violent and grief filled so like before starting that rp dm me so we can have guidelines

This post will be edited as needed

#whispers

[anxhoredheart]

( scott speedman, cisman, he / him ) — 🎬 just announced, mason townsend has been cast as clay morrow in the upcoming sons of anarchy reboot. the forty six year old is trending as people are debating if the trying to find amends in the bottom of a bottle, losing the star shine in a sea of forgotten faces, a deeply rooted passion that begs to take flight, braving new worlds long cast aside, worn flannel and designer denim and a smile that can charm that they are known for is enough to make them as good as original. a quick google search shows that their fans call them outgoing, but internet trolls think they’re more obsessive. i guess their newest interview for variety where they talk about their shocking return to acting after his indefinite hiatus will let people to know them better.

basics:

tw: drug/alcohol problem mentions

this is under co.

traits: reckless, romantic, flirtatious, charming, flaky, inconsistent, selfish, forgetful, addictive, intense, generous, hopeful, clever, sarcastic, insecure, earnest, independent, patient.

relationship status: it's complicated, but he's a flirt, so buckle up.

sexuality: heterosexual, unless on mdma.

religion: fuck it.

date of birth:  february 2nd.

zodiac sign: aquarius.

skills & hobbies: socializing/schmoozing, drinking (day or night, oops), memorization, romantic movies, arguing, video games (retro ones, mainly), acting, watching movies, binging netflix shows, spending time with others, meeting new people, flirting, marketing.

dislikes & fears:

quirks: romance flicks make him cry. he loves the smell of fresh paint.

fun fact:

pets: none currently.

family: not necessarily in contact anymore.

credits: that 70s show (michael kelso), in the land of women (carter webb), and a few indie thriller flops no one remembers.

backstory:

tw: drinking, alcoholism, addiction

it was a cookie-cutter, white-picket fence life for middle-class mason towndsend, growing up in a close-knit community in connecticut, close enough to nyc that he felt connected to the world. he wasn't left to want for much, though due to being the middle sibling, mason was most frequently left to his own devices && sources of entertainment.

this entailed a lot ruckus, and he was an athletic, happy-going child with a flare for the dramatics. he was well-liked, and extremely popular throughout highschool, and preferred to be surrounded by people. it was evident, very quickly, he was girl crazy, and had a handful of girlfriends throughout his high school years.

after graduating (barely making it to the ceremony, having been out partying the night before and barely passing with a low grade average), mason jetted off to california, and started sleeping on couches && scamming cash when he could to pursue a dream of acting.

it took some work, but in only two whirlwind years, mason had landed his break-out role as michael kelso in that 70s show at just twenty years old. while this was a genuine dream come true, and mason was over the moon to "stick it to his family", who had always doubted him (especially good old pops), in the end, it was never his acting role that changed his life thanks to the show.

it was rose, his co-star who played jackie. as the show progressed, and they grew closer, mason fell head over heels in love with her, moreso than his long, complicated, overlapping string of girlfriends && flings before. for him, there was only rose.

then he starred in a rom-com, gaining more traction in his fame as a hollywood heartthrob. there were parties, there were interviews... then things slowed. no one sent scripts, or if they did, they cast other actors. fights with rose started, whose trajectory went only upwards. she shone, and he continued to dull in the spotlight.

he turned to drinking, and within years, a couple of failed thrilled indie films that were massive flops (if they even made it to box office) and his agent quit, claiming his career as dead.

mason went overboard, and things with rose disintegrated, as he found himself more and more miserable out of the spotlight. things soured worse with his family, friends abandoned him, and mason avoided press like the plague, eventually falling out of sight... and out of mind.

his life was a dark time for awhile. rose continued to glow, so he stopped watching tv. there were a couple of health scares, and eventually, mason couldn't recognize the man he was in the mirror anymore. when he made the decision to hire an agent, in the middle of the nostalgic revolution, watching all these other formerly silent stars come back... he felt hope again, for the first time ever, but he'd changed. mason was no longer going to be recieved as michael kelso, as he once had been. but his new agent promised this was a GOOD thing, and now, mason could be anyone.

he chose to be rose's on-screen husband, clawing his way to get there, going as far as to lie, cheat, and sabotage the competition, and snatching the role after it was officially cast as someone else. now, he's made it back to the spotlight, and he's got big plans on what to do with it.

wanted connections:

cast mates: self-explanatory! some may be bothered or suspicious how he got the role, or have been fans of that 70s show in the past and remember him?

former friends in the industry: anyone he knew before going dark && disappearing for years! so like, probably 2012/2013 was the last major contact together.

someone he slept with/casually dated during his indefinite hiatus: he'd have them sworn to secrecy by now, and probably avoids them/is embarrassed now, to have them know what he was like at his lowest. he wants to rebrand and rebuild - this will be awkward.

any other "burnout" stars returning: anyone who will accept/understand/support/encourage mason, or especially those who will relate to his struggles with drinking, failure, etc.

"sobriety" buddies: even tho mason will break his a few times...

taken connections:

his ex: rose, co-star on soa, and love of his life.

#2000.intro #. << muse >> mason.

[28whitepeonies]

hey i don’t mean to be rude so i apologize if i come off as such. but i’ve been following you for a while and you’re such a logical and reasonable person, and you seem quite smart too. so i wonder how someone like you could still believe in larry? again, no offense, i’m just not used to seeing sensible levelheaded people be larries.

Good morning anon

This is a bit of a funny one I think, because I’m not sure that believing Louis and Harry are in a relationship would be illogical/unreasonable, but neither would be believing that they’re not. I do think there are a lot of people in fandom whose logic is very different to mine, and there is definitely a great deal of not-levelheadedness in this fandom, although I’m quite frequently on a rant about something so I’m not sure I’m much different!

I guess what it will always come down to for me is that I’m pretty convinced they were in a romantic relationship of some sorts during at least some of the 1D days, and that post-hiatus there’s plenty that makes me continue to believe that. Some of that is in their songwriting, Louis’ album in particular (mainly because I think Harrys writing is so much more open to interpretation, so what I think and what you think might be very different) much of which tells a story of a long term relationship, and the ups and downs that come with it. Eleanor’s role in Louis’ life is another, and I am nosy enough to say that I’m curious about that and all the time where Louis just disappears, and I think there could be many reasons for that but the timing is often interesting to me. There are little things too, that I think are more unlikely to be a coincidence, the odd clothing choice, some similarities in things they say etc.

And the very last reason in all of this is that I want to, so if there’s a time that somethings a bit marginal in my mind, it’s likely going to come down to the fact that in all of this, I want to believe that they’re still together. Like I said, I’m pretty convinced about the 1D days and there’s never been something that either of them has said or done that’s made me think ‘oh it’s impossible for them to be together’.

I will say that I don’t spend much time thinking about whether they are or aren’t together on a day-to-day basis, this is pretty much my baseline now. And I don’t generally buy into ideas about them never having broken up, or theorise about what their relationship looks like at any point because that’s impossible to know. Although I have the odd bit of headcanon I try to be clear about it, because we can’t know the ins and outs of anyones relationship we’re not in, nevermind of two millionaire closeted ex-boybanders.

There are other possibilities of course, I could be wrong about them being in a relationship now. I could be wrong about them having ever been in a relationship, although as I’ve said it would take quite a lot to sway me on that. But me being wrong on those things would probably leave me with more questions than I have now.

There’s also the possibility I’ll never know for certain any more than I do now and either I’ll keep on with the belief they’re together or something will happen that’s significant enough that I think they’re not. But if that did happen, it would still take something pretty compelling for me to think they were never together at all.

#anon #this is a bit of a ramble #soz #hope it makes some sense

[stayarmytinyzenmoa-l]

Prominence [WCh. 2.60]

Social Media AU ; Idol AU ; Added Unit AU CW/TW: Language, Obsessive Fans, Text Messages from Questionable Sources Genre: Comedy, Romance Pairing: NCT x Idol!Reader, Seonghwa x Reader Y/N Pronouns: Female (She/Her) Word Count: 3.5K

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Notes: Finally, a proper chapter! Thanks for being so patient with me during my semi hiatus! I can't wait to get back writing proper! Disclaimer: Please remember that this is an AU and a work of fiction, obviously the idols mentioned/written about in this story would never partake in these actions. The idols mentioned in this work are meant to be seen more as face claims rather than the actual idols themselves.

Feedback is greatly appreciated!! Thank you for reading!

24 February 2022

[Staring at the message on your phone, you could only let out a sigh]. Truthfully, this was the fifth message you'd received today from some anonymous sender, all telling you the same things. You knew better than to listen to them, of course, you did, you'd been dealing with messages like this since debut on Twitter. But there was something about having it sent to your personal number that really hit differently. You second-guessed sending the screenshot to the guys, you knew they of all people probably had it worse, but part of you appreciated the way they'd try to laugh it off, and usually it worked on you too.

Today wasn't one of those days though, it would seem.

You blocked the number, as usual, taking note of it and adding it to the shared note between you and Seojoon, ANiMA's manager, of the ever-growing list of reported phone numbers. Your list wasn't as long as Saeron's or Jihyun's, at least, and you didn't know if that was a good or bad thing yet.

The soft whimper in front of you pulled you from these thoughts and, immediately, Mars' eyes seemed to sadden as soon as he saw your expression.

"Hey, buddy," you patted the bed next to you and Mars hopped to sit next to you, resting his head on your lap and sighing. You pet the area between his ears. "How are you doing, hmm?" He whined as if to say that he'd had better days. "Yeah, me too, bud," you nodded your head and slowly laid down on your bed.

"Mars, should I do the collaboration?" You asked aloud. Mars shifted in your lap. "I don't know, every time I have any interaction with another idol people throw a fit, I don't think I can handle that right now, you know? Even getting back with Seonghwa... I don't know," you shook your head. Mars' ears perked at the mention of Seonghwa's name and he scrambled off of you to lie next to you instead, looking at you as if to say 'what's wrong with that?' "Well, you see, we already broke up, everyone got worked up when we got together, they rejoiced when we broke up, who knows how they'll react if we get back together?" You looked at Mars, whose expression was flat, as if to say 'So what?'

"So what? What do you mean by that?" You frowned. "I'm just tired, tired of going through all of this... when I debuted, I thought I'd just have fun all the time, maybe relax a little, I thought I'd just be glad that I debuted," you sighed. "I guess I should've been more realistic." Mars whined again and you rolled your eyes, looking at the time on the clock stationed on your nightstand. It was late now, nearly midnight. You'd have to get up early tomorrow to film more variety content with NCThree, nothing too bad, just the normal interviews.

Did you even want to open Twitter to read the comeback tags? Nah, not right now. The last thing you wanted to do was look at your phone.

Then, the slight vibration against wood. You had received a message. You didn't want to look at it, chances are it's from another one of those anonymous senders, and you just didn't have the energy for that. Mars pattered over you and towards the glowing light of your phone, his tail wagging and hitting your face lightly.

"Mars, seriously?" You groaned, eventually prying yourself off of bed and looking over at your phone, a message from Yangyang being on top of the many notifications. "Oh..." you picked up your phone and laid back down, turning on your side to read it.

"Geez..." you didn't fight the tired smile on your face. This guy, he always found a way to make you feel better, didn't he? You really won the best friend lottery with him. Mars scratched the door and you sat up. "When did you get over there? Want to go stretch your legs?" You got up and opened the door for him. Mars wandered out of your room and you closed it slightly, leaving it open for when he eventually returns to your room to go to bed.

And back under your covers you went, closing your eyes to finally get some sleep in.

~

Mars, meanwhile, trotted along the darkened rooms of the ANiMA side, moving only on muscle memory to locate the front door and, bingo. His nose grazed the doggy door and he slowly walked past it, taking care not to make too much noise. Somehow, the center room seemed much more daunting at night. The furniture seemed taller and the sound of water rushing through the pipes echoed. Mars' ears moved downwards while he crept around. Then, a ray of light. One of the kitchen lights flipped on, and it was evident that someone was walking around. Mars approached slowly, taking his time to identify the unknown man in the kitchen. Mars tilted his head to the side as if to ask who was in front of him.

Jisung, on the other hand, stared at Mars.

"What are you doing up so late?" He asks, looking at the bowl of ramen in his hand. "Oh... I guess we're both up a little late, huh?" Jisung smiles, slowly reaching out to Mars to pet him. Mars sniffs Jisung's hand first before licking it. "Ah... you're so cute..." Jisung coos. Mars eyes shone, and a plan formulated in his little head. Mars scampered off, leaving a pouting Jisung, only to return with the leash in his mouth. "Did you need to use the restroom?" Jisung looked around the center room, seeing no one else around. "I guess we could go outside really quick," Jisung took the leash from Mars' mouth and attached it correctly. "Okay! Let's go!" Jisung placed his midnight meal down and he and Mars walked over to the elevators, waiting patiently to descend. It seemed to take a long time, or at least for Mars, it felt like a long time. Not soon enough, they were outside and the cool February air was chilling them.

"We should've brought sweaters with us," Jisung chatters. Mars sits down on the concrete and Jisung sighs. "Just needed fresh air? I understand, sometimes I just sit on the roof to get fresh air too... it's really nice," Jisung sighs. Mars stands up and looks at Jisung. "Ready to do your thing?" Jisung asks. Mars ears perk up and Jisung stares at him, trying to read the dog's expression. Suddenly, Mars bolts, and the leash escapes Jisung's grip.

"What... what... what?!" Realization fills Jisung's features and he runs after Mars. "Hey! Uh... oh no... name... what was (Y/N)'s dog's name?!" Jisung panics, his hands flying to both sides of his head. He opts to whistle and click his tongue instead, but Mars was long gone into the night. "Oh no..." Jisung gulps harshly and runs back to the dorms. If the ride down was slow, then the ascension back was worse. As soon as he re-entered the center room, every hair on his neck stood up and he whipped his head around, being sure to look around for you. You were out of sight, so far, but that did nothing to solve his problem. He went to the first person he could think of.

"Hyung, hyung, wake up," Jisung shook Jeno awake. Jeno only groaned, absently waving him off. "Hyung, please wake up, I made a mistake."

"Jisung, if you didn't put enough water the first time, just add some and mix it into the ramen," Jeno mumbles against his pillow.

"No, it's not that, I think I lost (Y/N)'s dog."

"You put too much water? Uh... I can't really help with that. Just open another one and use the flavor packet from there."

"Hyung, I lost (Y/N)'s dog." Jeno sat up now, staring at Jisung with tired eyes.

"Mars. (Y/N)'s dog's name is Mars. Why do you ask?"

"I lost him."

"Mars?"

"Yes."

"I'm sure he's in here somewhere, sometimes him and Bella hang out under the couches."

"No, hyung, I lost him outside," Jisung insists. Jeno blinks once, then twice, then his eyes widen.

"What do you mean you lost Mars?!"

"I thought he had to potty because he brought me his leash so I went downstairs with him and he ran off!"

"You lost Mars?! Oh, god, (Y/N) is not going to handle this well," Jeno jumps out of bed and starts pacing the room. "Let's just buy another dog."

"We can't just buy another dog, are you insane?! She'll know!"

"Will she though?"

"Yes! Of course, she will! That's her dog!"

"Okay, but if we distract (Y/N) long enough she won't notice-"

"Can you two keep it down?" Jaemin grumbles.

"Jaemin, Jisung lost Mars," Jeno half whispers. Jaemin sits up now, his expression changing between shock, questioning, and surprise before finally relaxing back into sleepiness.

"He'll be fine," Jaemin finally answers.

"How do you know?!"

"Manifest it," Jaemin lies back down and pulls the covers over his head.

"Oh my god, we're screwed," Jisung falls on Jeno's bed.

"We? Who's we?!" Jeno gasps. "Just tell her the truth!" Jeno continues.

"What if she hates me forever?!"

"She won't hate you forever."

"Can you say that with 100% confidence?" Jisung grimaces. Jeno hesitates.

"... Yes?"

"Oh no..." Jisung buries his face in his hands.

~

Running along the mostly empty streets, Mars was still running off of muscle memory. He recognized a few landmarks, certain plants and certain smells, and he had to avoid a few crossing pedestrians, and maybe run away from a few as well, but he could tell he was getting close. Or, maybe the streets were blending together? It'd been so long since he walked down this path that his memory was getting hazy.

But, soon enough, hope.

"You know, hyung, I was thinking," Wooyoung stretches his arms over his head, the other seven boys piling out of the car behind him after a long day of rehersals. "Maybe we could throw a huge welcome party for (Y/N), it sounds fun!"

"A party? What for?" Yunho asks.

"Well, just to celebrate the return of our ninth member!" Wooyoung grins. "That and... uh... her searches haven't been too hot lately..." he clears his throat.

"She always got too caught up in those," Seonghwa sighs. "She's been having a rough time at work too, I think, a party sounds nice," he says. "Who are we inviting?"

"Uh... we can't fit too many people in the dorm, so maybe just ANiMA and those other two," Wooyoung hums.

"Those other two! They have names, you know," Hongjoong laughs.

"Yeah, yeah, traitor one and traitor two," Wooyoung scoffs. Mars barks. "Yeah, Mars gets it! See? Always on my side, as he should be, this is why I'm the favorite uncle," Wooyoung points to the dog who was patiently waiting by the door for them to open it. The group is silent, staring at the shiba in front of them. "Wait a second," Wooyoung whips his head to look down at him, Mars' leash had been dragging behind him and had picked up a few stray twigs and leaves on his way over, his light paws had been darkened after pattering across asphalt for a while, and, most noticeably, a mischievous glint was in his eyes.

"Mars! What are you doing here?!" Yeosang gasps, picking Mars up in his arms. "You're so cold, oh goodness," he shakes his head.

"Mars? Did you escape the NCT Dorms?" Seonghwa asks. Mars nods his head. "You mischievous little... does your mom know you're here?" Mars shakes his head. "Ah, I'll text her and let her know you made your way over here," Seonghwa sighs, opening the door to the dorms and letting everyone in first before following. Mars had latched himself onto Yeosang, and he seemed to be looking at Seonghwa with joy.

"This dog is too smart for his own good," Hongjoong chuckles.

"That's what happens when you leave him to be raised by ANiMA, I have no idea how those girls did it, but sometimes I think Mars is smarter than me," Seonghwa says nervously. Mars barks, as if to confirm Seonghwa's statement.

"Aww, you cutie, missed your dad's side too much?" Yeosang coos. "Aww, we missed you too! Yes, we did! We missed you so much!"

"And he's gone," San laughs. "I hope they're not making too much of a fuss with Mars missing," he shakes his head.

~

"Why are shiba inus so expensive?!" Jisung silently screams while Jaemin rubs his tired eyes. He strained to read the bright computer screen in the darkness.

"Shh, I'm focusing," Jaemin shushes, analyzing each picture of a shiba. "Jeno, what about this one?"

"No, that dog looks nothing like Mars, what the hell?" Jeno shakes his head, almost sounding offended.

"Well, how the hell am I supposed to know? You're the only one out of us who actually spends time with Mars."

"Okay, don't get mad at me! Jisung's the one who lost him!"

"You don't have to remind me!" Jisung groans.

"Why don't you look for a replacement then, huh? Mind you he has to be fully trained and he has to have a weird habit of chewing our shoes," Jaemin rolls back on his chair and points to the computer, inviting Jeno to take his place.

~

"I'm sure they're fine," Jongho nods. "Mars always escapes our dorms, I wouldn't be surprised if he escapes theirs from time to time."

"Yeah, you're right," San nods. Regardless, Seonghwa sent you a quick message that Mars had shown up at their dorms and for you not to worry about it. "I'm impressed he knows the way, though, you're so clever!" San pets Mars head and Mars seems to smile.

"San, if he knows the way from our dorm to the NCT one, I'm pretty sure he knows the way from NCT's dorm to here," Hongjoong deadpans.

"Shit, I don't," San laughs.

"Of course, you don't," Hongjoong mumbles under his breath. Mars barks, as if to ridicule San. "Like mother, like son," Hongjoong chuckles. "So, it's official then? You and (Y/N) are back together?"

"Basically," Seonghwa's shoulders slump. "We're not putting anything in name yet, though, just in case. We're waiting for our schedules to die down," he adds.

"What's the just in case for, though?" Mingi asks. "You like her, I'm assuming she likes you, just get together already," he mumbles.

"It's more of a case of wanting to have time for each other, even if we tried to make time now, we'd just be too exhausted to even do anything," Seonghwa shakes his head and Mars whimpers. "Hey, it's alright, bud, look, you're here, that means everything's good," Seonghwa pets Mars while Mars slumps over Yeosang's shoulder.

"You know... call it intuition... but I feel like something bad's about to happen," Jongho crosses his arms.

"Oh, come on, don't say that!" Wooyoung laughs a little too loud. "Why would you even say that? That's a funny joke, Jongho! Now take it back! Take it back, please," Wooyoung whispers that last part and Jongho stares at him.

"Okay, then," Jongho slides away from Wooyoung. The other six members kept looking at Wooyoung for a few moments longer before returning to their own devices. Wooyoung laughs lightly again before taking his phone out of his pocket.

He knows Yeonjun well enough, they'd been friends this long. If he reached out to you there should only be one reason, he respects you as an artist.

Wooyoung stared at the last few messages. Easier? What did he mean by easier? He knows Yeonjun, he was lucky that he was right that Yeonjun wanted to collaborate.

It can't be anything more than that, right?

Wooyoung looked over to Seonghwa, whose shoulders had noticeably relaxed over the past few days, his jaw wasn't clenched all the time anymore, and, for the first time in months, he seemed genuinely content.

Wooyoung shook his head, how could he have doubted his best friend so much? He's overthinking things, of course, he doesn't want to see his two friends hurting again, of course, he'd be a little worried. He trusts you enough to know how to handle things too, there's nothing to be scared of. Wooyoung looked up from his phone and froze, Mars' eyes trained on him and him only, as if he knew what he was hiding. Wooyoung held his breath and Mars held his stare, until they approached their dorms and Yeosang placed Mars on the floor, Mars looking back at Wooyoung for a bit longer before trotting off to Seonghwa's room.

~

With a harsh slam of his door, he suddenly gasped when he saw the bookshelf shake, and his heart dropped when he saw something fall.

"No! No, no!" He dropped to the ground, taking deep breaths to steady himself, he made blind sweeps in the dark to find what fell and he was even more devastated when he found it. He picked up the photocard from the floor and examined it for any damage. He lets out a sigh of relief, the penny sleeve and protector it was inside of did their job properly. He props the card against the shelf, placing it in front of the many other photocards similar to it.

Anyone would understand his frustration, your photocards are precious. And the one he knocked over cost him a good $80 plus shipping, anyone would be royally pissed. But, he had to count his blessings, he's lucky he didn't damage any of his (Y/N) Ver. albums, then he really would've lost his temper.

He hasn't seen you much at work, lately, he's been assigned to the other members, it really dampened his mood, too, he could care less about those other losers in your group. He signed up to work at SM for one reason and one reason only.

All he cared about was you.

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