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furiousgoldfish · 3 years

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Tactics of narcissistic abuse

Love Bombing & Mirroring are tactics to gain your favour. These will come from a narcissist you’re just getting to know and they’re trying to convince you they’re your perfect partner, soulmate, best friend, ideal lover. Love bombing is showering you with over-the-top affection and support, they’re likely to see what works best on you, then give you just that. They’ll convince you that you’re special and make you feel special, whether it’s with attention, gifts, promises, love phrases, or making you look and feel very good in front of other people. If they can spin this as fate or destiny, they will. You have one lucky coincidence? It’s destiny that you met. They’ll create the image of ‘it’s us against the world’ and convince you that they’re all you need to never be alone, unappreciated or unhappy again. They will say phrases like 'We were born to be together’ or 'You’re the only one who understands’ and make you feel like you’re in a romance film. Mirroring is the way to convince you that they are just like you, your perfect match. They do this by pretending they want the same things as you. All of your opinions will be shared, your desires will be their desires too, however you want to live, that’s now their ideal life too. If you want children, so do they, if you want to live in a cottage, so do they.

These will be repeated until you feel like you finally got something perfect from life, you commit to them and trust them completely. You will become lenient with your boundaries and disregard minor red flags, because hey, you finally found love, or someone like yourself who makes your life better. These are crucial to keep you around for a long time; the illusion of happiness and perfect companionship you always wanted will keep you holding onto them in hope that things could once again, be this perfect for you. You will not want to let go of them even after the love bombing and mirroring is long gone. Love bombing and mirroring are not indicative of how they’re planning to treat you once you’re committed to them; as soon as they feel you are ready to fight for a life with them, roles will change and you will have to endure escalating abuse from this person, endlessly.

Scapegoats and people badly damaged by trauma will often not get the full love bombing or mirroring, narcissists will be able to win our devotion by acts of basic decency, small thoughtfulness and acting tolerant of our trauma symptoms, this will feel like everything to us, and once we decide this is a good, special person who makes us feel safe and we’d do anything for them, they’ll turn and exploit us endlessly.

Only way to spot this on time is: there will be a little voice of suspicion in your head going ’Isn’t this actually a little too perfect to be real? A little too convenient and ideal?’ and you will not want to listen to that voice. You should listen to it. It’s your instinct, trying to tell you something is off. I won’t blame you if you don’t. Most people won’t just walk away from their ideal partner because things seem 'too perfect’. But, get suspicious at least. Alert to red flags.

Enablers and Flying Monkeys

Narcissists can’t abuse if they’re on their own; they will work hard to build a reputation and charm people who they can later use for purposes of enabling, triangulating, controlling, scapegoating and smear campaigns. Enablers, or Flying Monkeys, are people who are either admiring the narcissists, want to be in narcissists good favour, are trauma bond and scared of the narcissists, are emotionally manipulated or simply too cowardly to point out that the narcissists is wrong and cruel. Most people will fall under the influence and want to be on narcissists side because it’s easier, tempting, feels safer, and doesn’t require much thinking. Narcissist will sometimes emotionally manipulate people to go do their dirty work; they will cry about how they miss their runaway children so flying monkeys would harass and judge children for running away, they will invent stories of abuse and insanity of their spouse so people would shame and judge the spouse who the narcissist is abusing. They create environment in which they can keep abusing and other people will jump to defend, justify, victim-blame and further confuse the victim. “They had a hard life”, “They’re your mother/father/uncle, you have to forgive them” or “He’s not that bad” are the phrases you’ll hear from enablers and flying monkeys. The term “Flying Monkey” is taken from the Wizard of Oz, because the Wicked Witch owned an army of brainless flying monkeys who would do her bidding – much how narcissists do with their enablers.

What enablers are doing is absolutely wrong. They should not be ready to defend abuse, or excuse and justify it, or believe and act on smear campaigns, not for any reason. They are hurting and isolating the victim, and regardless of how much they suck up to the narcissist, they will eventually become the targets too. Victims are right to cut out enablers just how they’re right to cut out abusers. You do not have to suffer for their cowardice or stupidity.

Triangulation is a form of abuse where narcissist brings another person into the relationship in order to bypass your boundary. For instance, you refuse to speak to the narcissist, so they send your family members, friends, or their friends, to talk to you about how much you’re hurting the narcissist and how cruel and unfair you’re being. Or, you’re trying to set a boundary in your marriage, and suddenly a friend or a relative comes talking to you about how unreasonable it is to set such awful boundary and to think of your spouse’s feelings and how bad they have it. Narcissist may try to use you for triangulation too, for example, they might tell you 'Go tell your sister she should do xyz and she’s making a mistake, she’ll listen to you’. It’s implied you agree with the narcissist, and that both of you are doing it for the sister’s good, when it’s more likely the narcissist is trying to force this person to do something they’re deeply set against and would only serve the narcissist. Narcissists will use their children to triangulate a marriage, they will often 'gang up’ other family members on their spouse, or one of the children. If you’re the victim, you’ll find yourself cornered, isolated, and in doubt whether you’re doing the right thing, trying to establish a boundary. Narcissists will also often show affection, compassion or even love to a third person simply to make you jealous and worried that something is wrong with you since you don’t get the same treatment. It’s what creates an illusion that the entire world is agreeing with the narcissist and no matter what you do, you look unreasonable for fighting them.

Narcissists will sometimes invent completely boogus scenarios and try to terrify people into doing their bidding and believing they’re right. As if the world will fall if narcissists don’t get what they want.

Society at large will often enable abusers; you can call out abuse and be rendered a 'killjoy’ because people prefer to enjoy cruelty together with the narcissist than to oppose them. Narcissists are capable of rousing a whole gang of people to turn against the victim and to aid in their abuse; this is scapegoating.

Gaslighting is a form of abuse where the abuser attacks your sense of reality. They will usually do this to obscure and deny acts of abuse. “I never said that” “That didn’t happen” “That’s not how I remember it” “You imagined it” or “You’re crazy, I would never do that!” are common gaslighting phrases abusers use for events that absolutely happened, and they absolutely remember. It’s even more powerful if they get other people to agree that you’re insane for remembering a past event of abuse. They can sometimes try to convince you that something didn’t occur while it’s still happening. This renders your intention of calling out abuse impossible; you’re now debating whether the event even happened and your sanity is questioned.

The point of this is to drive you into insanity; prolonged gaslighting will make you doubt your own memories and senses, and you will no longer be secure in your own point of view or version of reality. You will not be able to fight abuse, because you will get stuck on wondering if it’s even real, or if you’re making it up. Narcissist wants not only to abuse you, but to control your perception of it, reaction of it, and to disable you from telling anyone and being taken seriously. Smear campaign and gaslighting ensures that everyone thinks you’re lying to make problems, even you.

You can attempt to block gaslighting with phrases like 'That was not my experience’ 'I know the truth and I am not debating it with you’ ’ Don’t tell me what happened, I was there’ or ridiculing them for thinking it would work, but sometimes abuse will escalate if you refuse to play along, so be very careful with them.

Baiting, Projection and Scapegoating

Baiting is the way narcissist finds out which triggers will work on you. Types of baits are: Scaremongering, Accusations, False Claims, Guilt-tripping, Victim-playing, False Hope, or Intrigue. They will use these to elicit either fear&anxiety, or guilt&responsibility. You are likely to get pulled in and respond emotionally to these, and thus the narcissist will discover which one of these is most triggering and they can use it to either control you, or to affirm that they can still get you riled up, scared, guilty – they feed on being able to provoke these, it makes them feel powerful. They can later use the same trigger to push you into guilt and fear if you try to resist their control. If they continue doing this to you for a long time, you are likely to develop self-doubt and anxiety about your own persona. Way to counter this is to grey rock them.

Projection is a primitive defense-mechanism, where a person feels uncomfortable with their behaviour or thinking, so they accuse someone else of it to deflect the bad feelings from themselves. This can feel the same as baiting, but narcissists do it without realizing they’re giving you the information about what they’re actually feeling and doing. For instance, a narcissist will accuse you of being self-absorbed after they start feeling uncomfortable with how self-absorbed they are, they will start to call you selfish when it comes to their mind how selfish they are. They will accuse you of the exact shit they’ve been doing whether it’s lying, manipulating, faking for attention, cheating, exploiting, lacking compassion, stealing. These claims will feel like they’re coming out of nowhere at first, but eventually you will wonder if you’re really like that, and accept their projection on yourself, believing to really be as bad, or worse than they are. Even though they’ve done 100% of these things, while you have done none of it. This can also be countered by being aware what is going on and grey-rocking them. Deflecting the blame back to them will not work because they’ll either deflect it back, or throw a tantrum and insult you.

Scapegoating is the most vicious abuse narcissist can inflict on their victims and is designed to completely break a person’s spirit while creating power out of terror. Scapegoating doesn’t only serve to terrify and control the victim; it shows everyone what the narcissist is capable of, causing them to go very far to avoid becoming the next scapegoat. This creates enablers, flying monkeys and other benefits for narcissist to enjoy, while the scapegoat is isolated, not believed, and often shunned by the community to show loyalty to the narcissist.

Scapegoat will be blamed for every narcissists flaw, accused of provocation and creating trouble, shamed for their likes and interests, humiliated for their appearance or needs, their work will be rendered worthless and any pain and injury will be treated as if the scapegoat deserved it, or wanted it. Nothing is out of bounds to criticize or belittle in the scapegoat; flying monkeys will do it too, to either affirm themselves with the narcissist, or because they too crave power by stepping on someone defenseless. If a narcissistic parent decides to scapegoat a child, the other parent might stop caring for the child, and agree that the child deserves only to be neglected and shunned. The illusion narcissists create, of entire society agreeing that a person is irredeemable, deserving only of pain and ridicule, has turned people to suicide.

Scapegoat absorbs all of the narcissist’s malice, cruelty, sadism, baiting, projection, guilt and tantrums, so other people in the environment can get some relief and can use the scapegoat as their shield. You can be chosen to be a scapegoat for challenging the narcissist and standing up to them, for refusing to scapegoat someone else, for seeing thru them and showing any potential for undermining their authority, if narcissist is jealous of you, if narcissist feels threatened by your intellect, compassion and emotional depth they lack. And often, you’ll just be chosen because they’re in position of power and you’re unprotected. If you’re their child, a lonely classmate, employee with no high reputation or lots of friends, a minority, different in the way of sexuality or behaviour, anything that is easily used to sway a group of people against you. Narcissists will make sure to spread a smear campaign filled with lies against you, so that nobody would align with you, or believe you if you try to counter their word.

This type of treatment is beyond anything a human being could deserve, and devastating for the victim’s self esteem and sense of reality. After surviving a scapegoating situation, people might not want to find themselves in any social setting anymore. They might start believing themselves to be unlovable and defective. There is usually no way to counter it or fight your way out, unless there’s a higher authority who could side with you, or there’s a way to physically remove yourself from this environment.

Grey Rock, Hoovering and No Contact

Grey rock is a way to counter baiting and projection; narcissists learn and thrive on our emotional responses, it gives them a thrill to be able to send us into rage, terror, disbelief, shock or panic. Grey rocking means you give zero emotional response, and thus prove yourself very boring and a bad source of narcissistic supply. So, regardless of what egregious threat, accusation, claim or insult they make, you just reply with 'mhmm’ and look completely disinterested. You reply with one-word sentences, say 'sure’ or 'yup’ if they accuse you of something or try to fearmonger, answer questions with 'maybe’ or 'I don’t know’, agree with whatever bs they’re pulling out of their ass without caring, refuse to get pulled in or baited, give them no significance in the conversation until they leave. It is very hard to do, because they will up their game and even fly into rage to get a response, if they feel entitled to it. In some cases they might resort to violence. Often, they’ll keep changing the tactics until something works, and if nothing does, they’ll feel dejected and go find another source of supply. If they feel like they can’t get to you, this undermines their imagined power over you.

No contact is the only way to truly win against a narcissist; if they can’t reach you, they can’t manipulate or hurt you. This means no responding to messages, no letting them know where you live, blocking them on every service, and in most situations, even the enablers have to be no contact, because the narcissist is likely to send them into triangulation and use them to get to you. If you’re unable to go no-contact with a narcissist, a lot of people opt for 'low contact’, which means you only hear from them once a year, or once every 6 months, insufficient for them to gain control over you, and you grey-rock them all the way, and never share any personal info that might be used against you. Hoovering is something a narcissist will do to you after you’ve left them. They might leave you alone for a long time, then suddenly send a message saying they miss you, or they’re thinking about you and wishing you could do xyz together. They might also influence another person to tell you 'x misses you, they wish to see you again, they’re doing bad without you’. This is done to remind you of the 'good times’ and an attempt to draw you back in, as you’re supposed to have forgotten all the abuse already and be ready to take them back. It might come as outrageous expectation or denial of everything bad that happened – that’s because it is. All you have to do is grey-rock this, not respond, and enjoy in knowledge that even if you can’t ensure revenge, you can take yourself away from them, and they will never have you back.

Sources: Baiting, Scapegoating, LoveBombing, Gaslighting(video), Projection(video), Triangulation, Mirroring(video), FlyingMonkeys (video), Hoovering, Grey Rock

#narcissistic abuse #scapegoating #psychological abuse #narcissistic parents #emotional abuse #gaslighting #love bombing #mirroring #baiting #projection #triangulation #flying monkeys #enablers #this took 3 days to write wow #did you notice tumblr beta has a character limit???#i had to turn it off to be able to post this #i don't want a character limit on tumblr #let people read

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mrssnivellussnape · 3 years

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Gif creds to yours truly

Day IV

Bitten

Previous | Next

Requested: Fluff - 1. "She does that when she thinks no one's looking" Ga I love when Sev notices small things

Prompt: “She does that she thinks no one’s looking.”

An: First off, I love you too!!! And thank you for all the nice things you said in your request 🥺🥺 !! Second, I wasn’t sure if the dance they performed at the Yule ball was a Foxtrot or Viennese Waltz (trust me I spent almost an hour looking and watching videos to find out 😭) so excuse any information [with the dance] if it’s incorrect!! Enjoy 🖤🖤

Words: 1.6k

Disclaimer: I’m not Scottish, nor am I too familiar with the dishes or phrases, so if I got any thing incorrect, feel free to correct me.

The first thing to greet Minerva was Severus. The formal yet comfortable greeting caused her usually stern face to crinkle with a gentle smile, one that had Severus’ face softening for the witch. The second, was the beautiful smell that’d been wafting through the air when she stepped through the threshold.

She looked around the cozy living space, offering a tender smile at the feeling it gave her. She felt both welcomed and warmed, partly due to the blazing fire that was crackling in front of the plush sofas. Sitting down, she felt as if she was sinking into the comforting material of the settee, the fluffy carpet beneath her heeled feet aiding in her contentment.

“How are you today, Minerva?” Severus politely asked.

The older woman straightened her posture, “Honestly, Severus, there’s no need to be so formal. We are at your house after all.”

Crossing his legs, he queried, “Am I not allowed to be polite?”

“You’re more than welcome, though, small talk has never been our thing.” She chuckled.

“You’re correct in that matter,” he agreed. “But maybe I’ve been told to be more welcoming.” He sneered.

It had no influence on Minerva considering she was used to it, however, she had found it amusing. “Ah, I see.” She smirked.

“What?” Severus quickly wondered.

“You’ve caught the bug.” She chuckled.

He looked confused, “What bug? I haven’t caught anything.”

That’d made her laugh. Sometimes, Severus’ could be oblivious to certain things. “No, honey, I mean the love bug.” She corrected.

Severus eyed her curiously, she might’ve had a point. Yes, he’d been… happier lately, and apparently it was noticeably so. Maybe he even felt like being somewhat nicer - only to Minerva or some of his other colleagues, but he hadn’t been bitten by something. Especially not the love bug. Even if he had, he wouldn’t admit that so soon. Would he?

“I have no idea what you mean.” He denied. Either way, so what if he had?

Another laugh, “You’re acting as if you’re the one who has to be nervous.”

Wondering what she meant, “As opposed to?”

“Y/n.” She nodded her head in the direction of the melodious humming she heard, “She is the one I’m meeting tonight, yes?” She tilted her head in curiosity.

“You’re meeting her, yes, but should she be nervous?” Her previous statement had him pondering.

“Of course not, I’m sure I’ll approve.” She conceded. She’d began pouring herself a cup of tea, stopping briefly to raise an eyebrow at his puzzled stare.

Severus slid the glass containing the sugar, despite Minerva preferring none, and eyed her until he found himself able to raise the question. “I wasn’t aware I was worried if you approved or not.” He wasn’t upset by the notion, he knew that’d been the hidden reason.

“You’re not?” She continued after he offered her an unceremonious shoulder shrug, very unlike himself, “I don’t see Albus here, neither Pomona or Filius. Hagrid isn’t even here, actually.” She shook her head at his scoff, “You wouldn’t leave Hagrid out, no matter how much you deny it.”

“You sound sure of yourself.” He smirked.

Allowing herself a sip of tea, “Had I not raised you during your years at Hogwarts? You are my honorary Gryffindor after all.” She smiled into her porcelain chalet.

“Please, I’m trying to keep my appetite. I’d never be in the same sentence with that word, let alone in the house. Honorary or not.” He fixed her with a stern glare, one that’d fallen when she raised a thin, dark eyebrow.

“Speaking of dinner, what is Y/n cooking?”

Severus sent a one sided simper her way, “Y/n wanted to keep it a surprise; she’s trying to impress you.”

Minerva smiled, “Any woman that can make Severus Snape smile is an impressive woman all on her own.”

“You haven’t seen me… smile.” He argued. Her head nodded towards a particular picture frame that was sitting on the mantle. He followed her eyes before flicking his wand, wordlessly laying the picture flat on its front. “That is besides the point.”

“Of course it is, honey.” Minerva concurred.

The next second, you were seen waltzing past the doorway, smoothly gliding past the arch and not noticing the amused glances that were sent your way. You’d disappeared before floating past again.

“Is she waltzing?” Minerva had a light tone in her voice and her face flaunted a benevolent smile, a kind look in her eyes.

“She does that when she thinks no one’s looking.” Severus answered. “She has two different versions; a Viennese Waltz for when she’s baking something sweet, and a Foxtrot Waltz while cooking something hearty. It’s entrancing.” He admitted.

“Is it?” She benignly twinkled.

An automatic nod was given in response, “If she’s too caught up in her own head, she’ll miscalculate a step and hit her hip on the corner of the counter. Then, she’ll blush and look around to see if I caught it. I always do.” Severus relayed, lost in a trance of his own.

Almost as if he’d seen the future, you did exactly what he’d said. On one particular spin, you twirled, underestimating how close the granite surface was to you and bumped into it. You stumbled, catching yourself, before you looked out and saw Severus smirking at you. You rolled your eyes, flushing, before you resumed your cooking.

Due to the angle of the chair, you hadn’t seen Minerva, but Minerva had seen the clumsy move. She gave a warm laugh at how accurate Severus had been. Not bitten my arse, she unabashedly thought.

“I told you.” Severus interrupted her thoughts.

She inclined her head, “I didn’t disagree with you.” She argued.

“You wanted to.” He countered, standing up to go help you in the kitchen.

Striding into the spacious kitchen, Severus took a quick step to hurry and catch you, successfully joining your waltz. You giggled happily at his timed steps, falling into a smooth rhythm with him.

He connected your hands and twirled you around a few times before gathering your waist and reaching for your outstretched hand. When he took a step back, you did as well, then you took one forward and he’d do the same. Your synchronization was impressive and unbeknownst to either of you, Minerva’s interest had been peaked.

Severus dipped you and kept you there, staring deeply into your eyes and offering you a rare smile. You sent him back a sweeter one, one that pulled him into you, summoning him closer and bewitching him in that spot. Your eyes sparkled with happiness and despite any protest that Severus might’ve had, his chocolate orbs mirrored yours.

He leaned more intimately into you, closing the severed space that just barely shown between you, and sealed the tension between you two.

The kiss felt like the first touch of sunlight, it was so mellow and homely, beautiful and enticing. You felt your toes crinkle and curl before they stilled and then tingled. You clutched onto Severus’ robes, pulling him tighter to you and keeping him locked in place.

You grinned during the kiss and felt Severus’ lips do a twitch of their own. You gave him a few more short pecks but that hadn’t been enough for him, he’d gotten greedy. You tried to briefly pull away, remembering the meal you were preparing, however, Severus wasn’t done. Before he could try and sneakily slip his tongue in, your ears were met with a cough.

“Dinner and a show, what a pleasant surprise.” Minerva sent a wry smile, trying against herself not to laugh at the two surprised faces.

Nearly dropping you, Severus hastily picked you up and set you correctly to your feet. While your face was noticeably darker, Severus’ was turning redder than you’d ever seen before, threatening to don a deep crimson.

“Minerva, how nice to finally meet you!” You cleared your throat and beamed at her.

She returned your exuberant look, “I couldn’t agree more, dear.” She looked over your dainty shoulder to see what you had on the stove, “Is that haggis? With neeps and tatties!” Her voice had taken on one of joy, familiar with the dishes.

“I hope that’s alright, Severus told me you were Scottish. The Highlands?” You questioned, although you knew the answer.

“Yes! My Da used to make me this when I was younger. I never enjoyed it again until later on in life, though, nobody could make it has as well as he could.” Her appreciation of the dish had been noted in her tone and both you and Severus were thankful for that.

“Would you… like to help?” You offered. “I planned on making Cranachan, even though it’s traditionally made around Christmas-”

“And special occasions!” She jumped in to correct you, she hadn’t meant to.

“And special occasions.” It was funny to see a woman such as McGonagall so openly excited about something. Especially when Severus described her as a less severe version of himself. And considering you couldn’t picture him enjoying baking, you didn’t think you’d see her doing it either.

You two set to it, Minerva rolling up her sleeves and dropping her regal stature - just this once. Severus stood to the side, but joined in when the two of you dragged him in to help. You all spoke comfortably, almost as if this had been a regular occurrence between you all.

Minerva had taken a moment to fondly look at the way Severus looked at you. She caught the sentiment in his eyes whenever he glanced at you. His face softened and his tense shoulders would relax. When she thought he’d get mad at you tapping flour on his nose and spreading it on his forehead, making it appear as if he’d been working harder than he was, she couldn’t hide her look of surprise. Instead, he’d sent you a sly smile before flicking a pinch of it and tossing it in your direction. He’d missed and hit Minerva instead.

Definitely bitten by the love bug, Minerva concluded.

————

SNAPETOBER

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pushpinsheep · 3 years

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Hopefully this puts things in greater perspective because some tourists just don’t get it and need to hear this. For those who are curious and looking to travel in the future I hope you find this is informative! :) We could all use more perspective on linguistics and traveling imho. I have made some of these mistakes in the past too. We can all learn to be better guests/tourists. This mindset people have that not only is it okay for tourists to exploit and mistreat local populations, but it’s something that should be encouraged is wrong. You’re not entitled to anything special as a tourist just because you have enough money to play around somewhere “exotic” for a few weeks. Regardless of where people travel to. As a guest in someone else’s home you should put more effort into not being a total asshat. You will have a better time and you might learn something cool along the way. I will mostly be using France as an example since I live here and have more insight, but everything I say applies outside of France as well. Note: This information only applies to tourists. Immigrants and refugees are a unique situation and thus face different challenges and have different needs. A tourist chooses where to go and has time (and money) to plan for their trip, which is often only a few weeks or days. Immigrants and refugees often don’t have that same luxury and remain in the country for far longer. (in many cases permanently) Moving to a country places a greater linguistic and cultural demand on an individual. Remember to check your privilege. tourism =/= immigration/asylum. A) English is not the only language in existence. It might be a widely spoken language, but it’s not the most widely spoken language (that honor goes to Chinese) nor is it the only lingua franca. Chinese, Hindu, Spanish, French, and Arabic are all widely spoken across multiple borders and where you are on the planet will obviously dictate which one of these people go with. If you expect that to be English because your sphere of the internet happens to put you in that bubble of “my language or bust” ignorance then like... that’s on you pal. Get with the times and stop assuming everyone should just speak English. English speakers are not the only tourists and English, though widely used, is not the only other language a person might need. I have a friend from Laos who speaks absolutely no English. He doesn’t need it and never has. (even now) He speaks Lao (the regional dialects can be as different as Thai is from Laotian btw), Chinese, a bit of Thai, and French because they still use a lot of French for business dealings there. (something I didn’t know ngl) Assuming he should just speak English because “everyone else does” is ignorant. It’s rude. It puts no thought into his situation. It’s entitled. He’s traveled to visit friends in England and he has an English phrase book. He doesn’t need a lot of English so like... the phrase book is absolutely perfect. Most of what he does in England is sight see and speak Chinese with his friends. Be more like my friend from Laos. B) Official languages may not be the only language a country speaks within its borders. Regional and native languages exist and expecting the locals to speak a 3rd language on top of all that is unbelievably entitled. France has a number of them. There are people who are born and raised in France who don’t speak French in their day to day life. (or at all) Basque, Breton, Occitan, Alsatian, Yiddish, Ladino, Arabic and a number of others are all spoken within French borders. Many are at risk of being permanently lost (that’s why our new regional language law is important btw) and as a result a greater emphasis is placed on preserving them as opposed to learning something new. Most people have to learn the official language as it’s the only language a lot of countries will accept for paperwork, but anything else is up to the individual and you can suck an egg if you don’t like that. (this also applies to immigrants and refugees btw) Heck there are places in the US where people don’t even speak English day to day! Some places actually speak French or Spanish. I heard more Spanish in my day to day life than I did English where I grew up in NC! (moved to Florida and Spanish exploded. loved it!) C) Borders are a thing. People working and living across borders exist and English is often not the language they chose to go with as a result. France borders Germany, Spain, Italy, Belgium, England, and Switzerland. People who share these borders often choose to go with these languages. English is in there, but please note it’s not the only one. D) Culturally speaking a country may not like [insert common language here] and as a result may refuse to speak it. That’s entirely their choice. If you don’t like that then don’t visit the country. It’s really that easy. Colonialism is often a major factor at play in these situations. Respect that choice. You do not get a say in how people reclaim their identity. As for France? This might come as a shock to some people, but France doesn’t like England. I’m 100% certain these two places exist solely to punch each other in the nuts. (ball tap. an international past time) As a result getting English people to speak French or French people to speak English is about as easy as pulling your own teeth. I’ve been spit on for speaking English because people here just assume I’m from England or they hate “annoying Americans” and after seeing how y’all responded to the last post I made... yeah I totally get it now. Granted, that’s no excuse for someone being hostile, but it is something to keep in mind when you visit and applies to more than just France too. E) Retail workers and small shop owners don’t owe you shit. You have absolutely no right waltzing into a shop and demanding the staff speak your language (I don’t care how common it is) for the two weeks you’ve decided to play around in their home. Always ask them first. If they can’t or choose not to then tough luck. This is why a phrase book is important!

Retail workers and small shop owners get treated like shit enough. Some of y’all have never worked retail a day in your life and WOW does it show. Please respect retail workers and small shop owners. You don’t know what their day or life has been like. If they’re tired and don’t want to speak to you in a foreign language then that’s their right. I have had no issues using my phone or a phrase book to help communicate concepts when there is a language barrier. (and I fucking live in France. I’m not even visiting) Emergencies also happen and a phrase book or medical card in the native and/or official language is absolutely essential! Even if you just have an allergy to something! This is a great way to stay safe! When you visit another country being aware of and researching cultural differences includes linguistic differences. Tourists are guests. You don’t live here, you don’t get a say. Remember, learning a second language (esp if you don’t use it often) is really hard. If you’re visiting a country do not expect them to just use whatever language you speak. Mind you a phrase book is also important because people within a country may not have a strong grasp on English even if they do speak it. You can very easily get lost or injured without a phrase book to help you. These things allow you to better experience a country and communicate without actually having to learn the entire language... or any of it. And, once again, they exist for free online! You do not need to learn an entire language to visit somewhere, but you need to be prepared for there to be a barrier. People assuming I mean you need to learn a whole language are uh... really something else. Like do you guys think half the people bending over backwards to communicate with you know the full language? Go ahead. Fuck around and find out. ;) Obviously I’m not saying you should be treated poorly when visiting if you don’t know the language. Unfortunately no matter how much effort you put in there will always be someone who’s a jerk and I’m sorry for that. All I’m saying is as a tourist you owe it to yourself and others to be better prepared. Trust me. You’ll have a better time in the end. (and if you did the research you’d find that Paris is not the best first place to visit... even if you’re french lol) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GS64ZT4eWUA Please watch this guy’s video. It is hilarious and touches on a lot of the same points I just made. Thank you for your time. :) ---------------- Cultural tidbit for those who are curious about where I live in France: I live in Alsace currently! (moved from Lyon, but my spouse is from here) In Alsace you might meet people who speak English, but it’s also entirely likely you won’t! Alsace is also a very tourist heavy area because it looks like a German fairy tale and has a lot of tiny villages with cool stuff to do! I highly recommend visiting here over Paris! We have so many storks! (clackclackclack)

Our logo is a pretzel!

That being said, Alsace has its own regional language!

It’s not uncommon to see bilingual signage or to pass someone on the street and hear them speaking Alsatian. You’ll usually hear it from older people, children, or those from rural areas. It’s really fun to listen to and absolutely wild to see written on museum signs! Kids here will start school learning French, regardless of what they speak at home, which has resulted in a downswing of Alsatian speakers in recent years. That’s why the new regional language law I mentioned waaaaaay above is so important. It’ll allow schools to teach most of the day in Alsatian instead of French with the goal being fully bilingual adults! :) As of right now, most kids here choose German or English (depending on the school) as their second language. Some kids pick Alsatian and honestly? Good for them! I’m glad!

#sheep.txt #long text post #very long #txt #traveling #france #alsace #europe #tourism #language #languages

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enjennie · 3 years

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In The Limelight [chenle x reader]

Summary: Tutoring the CEO’s son, when you’re barely interested in business. And falling for him, when you knew nothing about love.

Genre: Fluff. Rich kid!Chenle Tutor!Reader

Warnings: None

a/n: not proofread! I’ve been in a slump lately ☹ my works haven’t been satisfying me but I hope you enjoy this! btw omg this is a reupload bc the first time... somehow, the paragraphs were jumbled up?

“Y/N, there are flowers on your desk,” your classmate gestures behind them to the classroom you were headed to before quickly passing by. You could only nod, a little taken aback by the sudden information you received. Flowers? As far as you know, Valentine’s had passed, so has white day and it’s definitely not your birthday.

But as you enter your classroom, the bundle of flowers catching your eyes, you knew one thing for sure was from who it was. As you approach your desk, you lift the thoughtful gift and inspect the small card attached to the string that tied it beautifully together. ZCH, it read in cursive.

“How was your day?” Chenle’s voice can be heard from the other line, the smile on his face almost something you can hear along with it.

“It was great! Thank you for the flowers, by the way. They’re delightful,” you beamed, eyes landing at the arrangement that now sat on your vanity. Chenle chuckles, his laughter sending serotonin to run through your body.

“Not a problem, I’m glad you like them,”

“Though I’d appreciate if you gave them to me yourself,” you cheekily continued. Chenle could only smile, his face softening at your request. It was a simple request. Yet, he couldn’t do it.

When you notice the silence that follow, you immediately regret what you said. You desperately try to backtrack, sputtering out words. “Well- I mean-, It’s fine- Thank you, still! I love them,”

Chenle hums, “I know. Don’t worry. You’ll wait though… right? It won’t be long,”

You plant your feet to your carpeted floor and nod, even if he can’t see you. “Of course, Lele,”

Zhong Chenle is the son of the most respected CEO of one of the biggest corporations in Shanghai the entire world. Chenle was the next in line to the company. After his brother had expressed how the business world didn’t interest him, the responsibility immediately fell into Chenle’s hands. And even if music was his love and calling, he had to let it go as to not disappoint his father.

Chenle had accepted it some time ago, going to school only for the degree so he could be eligible to own the business. He accepted the fact that he was going to be living the life his father made for him, not one he made for himself and it was the hardest pill to swallow. But things changed when he met you. There was more purpose to the things he does, it wasn’t just for nothing. Life had gone from monochromatic to colorful.

“Miss, Y/N. Mr. Zhong just moved and he has to take this class to pass the semester. I trust you can fill him in with our module? Mr. Zhong, this is Miss. Y/N, she scored the highest during midterms,” your world economics professor had marched towards you after class, a tall boy following behind her. He looked just as oblivious as she did, to the sudden weight and pressure being put on you.

You merely nod and say a simple hello, not being able to say anything else. It wasn’t a question, this was a demand. Jeez if I was gonna teach your student I should get a portion of your pay. You thought bitterly. At the time, you were struggling to juggle a part-time job at a café while also maintaining your grades to keep your scholarship.

When your professor left you two, the boy kept his hands buried in his pockets. His clothes were semi-casual and his hair was styled nicely. Who the hell moves halfway through the year?

“So, Mr. Zhong-“ you take your books into your arms and lazily sling your bag over your shoulder, heading towards the door with him trailing behind you.

“Chenle-, You can call me Chenle,” he finally spoke, startling you a little with how cool and soft his voice is as opposed to his striking visual that intimidated you at first.

“Nice to meet you, Chenle,” you give him a smile.

You were gonna be around this guy for who knows how long, might as well try to be his friend. Maybe it’ll make the teaching less of a chore.

“Wrong,” you huffed, marking his essay and adding in annotations. “Chenle, remember there is a specific way to start these essays and that’s by defining the terms you’re using,”

The boy sat opposite of you, arms crossed and back against the couch comfortably. You were in a café. The café you worked in, to be precise. Your schedule today overlapped with Chenle’s and as much as you didn’t want him to see you slaving around, you also couldn’t miss this paycheck at the café. You gave him an essay to write just to check on his phrasing and structure and left to buss some tables and serve orders. But when you came back, Chenle barely wrote anything and could care less about it.

“Can we not study today?” he whined.

You and Chenle have been meeting each other for a month now, and you’d soon learned about the type of boy he is, the life he led. In ways you didn’t expect to.

The first time you found out about Chenle’s reputation was through the newspaper. No, not the school newspaper. Not even the local newspaper. But on the Wallstreet Journal, when you had to grab material from any recent article for a class. Chenle’s name floated along with the words ‘Young entrepreneur’ and their company’s name. You gasped so loud you had to excuse yourself from the library and leave in a hurry. That afternoon you smacked him on the shoulder with your thick world econ textbook.

“You’re from a family of business corporates and you’re learning world economics from someone who crammed the exam?” you exclaimed. He stared at you blankly, book in hand and pen in the other.

“And you don’t pay me!” you added. The fact that you’ve been tutoring someone as rich as Chenle just didn’t make sense to you. Why not go to a professional? Instead, he was here with a sleep deprived college student who sometimes mixes up business terms just because she couldn’t care any less. World Economics was a mandatory for you. You studied to pass, sadly.

“I could start paying you, name the price,” he said easily. But you shook your head.

“I didn’t mean it that way, sorry. I actually don’t care about the money,” You led him to the picnic bench with the table outside school grounds and propped your book on it along with your bag before taking out your bento box. “Just blows my mind how you won’t just pay for the classes. I don’t teach that well-” you continue.

“I like you, though,” Chenle calmly interjects. You look up at the boy, movements being halted by his bold statement.

“Pardon?” you felt the need to have him clarify what he said. The boy leaned across the table, over your textbooks and notes. “I like you,” Chenle repeated himself, but the impact it had on you was just as powerful and hit you hard. Your heart was doing somersaults.

Chenle’s eyes grew thin as he smiled, backing away from you and sitting back down.

“So, chapter 12,” he starts flipping his book nonchalantly, leaving you out of breath with a heart hammering in your chest.

“What do you mean not study today? You have an upcoming quiz with Mr. Byun this Friday and mind you, that man searches for wrongs, not rights,” you raised a finger at him, shaking it matter-of-factly.

“No, let me help you. Do you usually run the café on your own?” he closes the book and takes his essay from your hand. You’re left slack jawed.

“No. I- Johnny couldn’t come in today,” you explained. Suddenly, you were stammering as if explaining to your boss. At first, you were doubting if it was the same Chenle you were reading about in the articles. The boy you were tutoring didn’t come off as someone who would be running corporates and buying stocks or whatever. He was more laid back and relaxed. Aside from the way he dressed, nothing gave it away that he was indeed the CEO’s son. But there were times where you got a dominant feel from him. Times when he stood with much authority and didn’t accept no for an answer. In those moments, you realize how Chenle’s presence alone demanded respect.

Soon enough, you found yourself behind the counter with Chenle beside you tying the apron to himself. He looked cute, somehow. The way he smiled at customers and tried giving them their recommendations set butterflies run free in your stomach, you almost swooned. He didn’t get much studying done that day, but you surely did. You learned the fact that you falling slowly but surely with Zhong Chenle.

There were two chapters you’re left to cover. In the short month and a half, you managed to teach Chenle six month’s worth of topics. Seeing him every other day made Chenle a familiar face to see around. Of course, you never actually got to see him around campus when you weren’t tutoring him. It left you wondering if you were actually teaching a ghost. But all doubts went away when the girls in your class started whispering about the cute boy waiting outside class. You quickly found out it was Chenle who they were talking about, and he was there for you. It was safe to say he wasn’t a ghost and is in fact real.

Carrying his book bag, he was stood against the wall with reading material under his arm.

“Chenle, we don’t have a schedule today,” you walk up to him, trying to avoid the dozen pairs of eyes that watched you. Chenle nodded, “Sorry, I won’t be here tomorrow. My father is bringing me on a business trip,” he states.

It wasn’t new for you to hear this coming from Chenle. Just the other week, his father brought him along to Japan for a company deal and Chenle came back with a little keychain souvenir for you. The same keychain dangled from your bag now as you both walked to the exit of the building. “Are you free?”

“Yeah, but I didn’t bring my book with me tod-“ you begin searching in your bag, even if you knew it wasn’t there. You were just trying to ignore the way his question made your heart jump.

“I mean… for dinner. Are you free for dinner?” he places a gentle hand on yours, stopping you from looking further in your bag. Chenle’s bold movements sometimes took him by surprise as well. He quickly retracts his hand, shoving it in his pockets. You let go of your bag, placing your hands on either side of you.

“Why?” you squinted at him suspiciously.

Chenle’s smile is small, but doesn’t go unnoticed by you as he turns his head towards his car then back down at you. “Listen, you don’t have to overanalyze this. I just want to treat you,”

Chenle had thought about it a hundred times or more, before finally making a decision. Although you’ve been seeing each other in cafes and libraries for some time now, he didn’t want to consider those as dates. Sure, it gave him time to admire you up close and get to know you but he wanted you to know his true intentions. The only problem was boy, was he a wuss. And were you oh so dense!

Despite the subtle and not so subtle hints he’s given you, you remained clueless about his feelings. Unsure, confused and just downright oblivious. From the way he looked at you to how he vocally told you he liked you. You shoved everything under the rug, afraid that this boy was just toying around with you and having a laugh. He found it cute.

It didn’t matter that you were in your school clothes, carrying about three thick books in your shoulder bag. He thought you looked stunning. You ate at a pizzeria just in town and he expressed how it tasted just like pizza from Italy. You said you wouldn’t know the difference since you’ve never been, and had a laugh about it.

The walk from his car to your apartment wasn’t that far, it’s just that he had to park a little further since there was no more space left in front. As you walked together, you noticed how the vibe and atmosphere between you two that developed as the night deepened, was different. More lax, comfortable. Like friends? You were both silent, until Chenle piped up.

“I lied, I didn’t just want to treat you,” he muttered, looking into the distance of your quiet street.

You turn your face towards him and you catch a glimpse of his face in the moonlight before looking away. He’d taken your bag from you and had it around his shoulder now. Him in his white polo shirt and brown suit jacket. He was always dressed like he was attending some kind of formal event. That’s Chenle for you. Mr. CEO’s son.

“Then?” you prompted him to continue.

Chenle averts his attention towards you as you finally reached the front of your apartment. You both stop walking, facing each other with the moon as your spotlight. You look at him from the light of the moon, it illuminated Chenle’s features perfectly. You would be able to inspect him when he studied, but each look at him made you breathless every time you had to look away. Much like right now.

“I wanted to take you out. Like, on a date,” Chenle confesses.

You could never wrap your head around how bold Chenle could be. Always leaving you flustered after saying such things, this boy was your weakness. But you didn’t give in. At least, you tried not to.

“Oh,” was your only response as you put your hands together, looking up at the tall boy. You hoped it wasn’t obvious that heat was rushing to your cheeks and ears by now. You could practically feel your blood flowing through your body, making you feel warm all over. “It was fun, I enjoyed it,” you shyly admit.

Chenle takes a step forward, raising his hand to palm your cheek gently. It’s the first time he’s ever gotten this close. “But I’m not sure you’re ready for my world yet,” his voice is lower, cool. Like wind.

You part your lips slightly, willing yourself to breathe. Your breath is unstable, shaky. This time, you take a step forward. “Are you underestimating me?” You don’t know where the surge of confidence came from, but you were thankful for it. The look of surprise is quickly melted into amusement as this was definitely the first time you ever made the second move to the dozens of times he’d left you flustered.

Chenle dips his head down close to your face. Eyes trained on each other, you tried to get yourself to breathe. He looked alluring, and you watch his eyes drop to your lips. Your head had become blank, nothing in mind. Just him. Chenle, and nothing else. His calm eyes, button nose and plump lips that you so very badly wanted to press against yours. “Are you sure?” he whispers.

You close the space between you and Chenle, lining your lips with his and connecting them together. The sensation almost sending you on your knees, you grab onto his shoulder for support and he holds you up by the waist, swiftly wrapping his strong arms around you. It felt like such a big relief, you almost sighed.

When you pulled away, Chenle’s smile comes into view as you fluttered your eyes open. He places his hand at the back of his head and scratches, suddenly becoming shy. You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.

“You’re something else,” you giggle, smacking his arm before snatching your bag from his shoulder and turning on your heel to leave. You feel his hand against yours, forcing you to stop. “I’ll see you after my trip?” he asks.

“Same time… for class,” you reply, looking back at him with a cheeky smile. Chenle lets your hand go, a smitten smile on his face and a warm feeling in his chest. Zhong Chenle wished things were simpler. He wanted to give you the world.

“It’s just a black tie party and my dad’s forcing me to come with a date,” he fixes himself in the mirror. He looked handsome, as always. In an all-black suit that fit him perfectly. Dressed like he had someplace to be, people to meet.

You sat on your bed behind him, arms folded and face scrunched up into a frown. A date. Probably someone from a rich family, better than you, his future spouse. They’d have perfect little babies together. All these bitter thoughts were flooding in your brain. When he notices your unusual quietness, Chenle turns to face you and gives you a goofy smile.

“What’s on your mind?” he approaches the bed, placing either hands on the side of you and leaning in close. Chenle could tell when you lied and knew exactly how to make you crack. You pull your knees to yourself and don’t bother hiding the scowl forming on your face. You couldn’t do anything about it. After several talks with Chenle, he explained how much pressure he gets from the media and his family. How dating even became a hassle because of how the pressure would then be shared with his partner.

For years, it wasn’t a problem. He didn’t find anyone that sparked his interest, and only had meaningless one night stands. He was fine with it, really. But all of that changed when he met you. For once, he wanted to go after something he loved. Not let it go, unlike what he did with his own passion for the sake of his father’s dream and business.

You shook your head, ridding the thoughts in your head and throwing them out. “Nothing. I know it’s just business. Message me when you get home?” you didn’t need to ask, but you still do. Chenle always kept you updated, whether if it was how the party he’s in has a chocolate fountain or if the bathrooms have automatic toilets. It was always bizarre hearing about his stories and taking a peek of what his world is like. The world of corporates. You weren’t ready for it, and Chenle knew.

The secrecy of your relationship didn’t last very long, soon enough it’s got media questioning who Chenle was seeing and your status. After a few run-ins with the paparazzi, you both decided it would be best if your meetups were more discreet. Luckily, the cameras hadn’t captured your face yet, but it was only a matter of time until they did.

To top it all off, the news had spread across campus. Girls left and right claiming they were the one dating Chenle, it didn’t bother you too much. You had a scholarship to keep and a job to go to. Sometimes, you’d find a single rose and a letter waiting for you in class, or at the café. Of course, you and Chenle had wrapped up the tutorial classes and he was able to pass the exam. He was one step closer to his degree, but happy wasn’t the word to describe him.

He yearned to be with you, have you in his arms and spend hours together just like you used to before things got complicated. Chenle grew lonely without your presence as months passed. Nonetheless, you hung onto the string of hope that maybe one day people wouldn’t care so much. That you could take all the criticism, the heat.

It was around 2am when your phone rang, disturbing your slumber. It was a Friday night and you took it upon yourself to catch up on some sleep after the horrendous exam week you just faced. Chenle had said goodnight hours ago. You wondered who could be calling at such an ungodly hour.

You pick up without checking the caller ID.

“Hello?”

“Y/N,” Chenle’s voice filled your ear. Your eyes snap open and you shot up from your bed, pulling the phone away from your ear. Sure enough, it was him. Lele, with a little heart beside the name.

“Hey, are you alright?” You ask worriedly. His voice sounded slow and there was rustling behind him.

Chenle lets out a groan, and your heartbeat picks up its pace. You knew better than to think Chenle would cheat, but it was definitely worrying hearing this without any idea what was going on. “I miss you,” he breathed, voice raspy and low. You couldn’t keep the smile from appearing on your face. In the darkness of your room, your heart swelled with joy. “I miss you too, Chenle,” you whispered back.

Distinct voices come through the line, and you make it out to be Jeno and Jaemin. They’re bickering and you hear a guitar in the mix. “We’ll leave you here, Chenle,” Jaemin calls to his friend before you hear a door close.

“Why did you call?” you ask but you were happy that he did.

“Because I can’t be there with you. Even if it’s all I want right now,” he confessed. Your smile faltered and a hint of sadness falls upon your face as he continues. He was obviously drunk, but Chenle has always been really honest because he couldn’t lie. These days however, you haven’t had the time to talk much and you knew there was a lot on his mind. It hurt to know that it’s been this, and you couldn’t do much about it. “I just want to tell everyone about us. Screw what they think, YN. You’re perfect to me,”

Hearing his words gave you a glimmer of hope. You wished he was right, you wished you could believe it.

“Chenle-“ you sighed. “I want that too,”

There was a moment of silence before his voice came through again and you thought he’d passed out drunk already. “I love you, Y/N. I’ve sacrificed so much for my father, but you’re not going to be one of them,”

His words brought the smile back to your face, tears welling up in your eyes from how happy you were to hear them. It seemed at this moment that you could battle anything, because you were with Chenle. Everything would be alright. He was here and you are too, it’s the two of you against the world.

“Tomorrow, let’s make it official,” Chenle proposed.

You bring your hand up to your lips and bite on your nails, now fully awake more than ever. “Okay,” you agreed. Chenle grins, getting up from his bed. “I’m coming over,” you can hear him walking around now, keys jangling and shoes on his wooden floor.

“You can’t drive-“ you hurriedly try to stop him, keeping in mind his state.

“I don’t drive a Tesla for nothing,” he chuckles. “I’ll be there soon,” The outgoing beeping of the call followed afterwards as he ended the call. The realization hit you a moment later.

The next day, you and Chenle arrived in school together. He stayed the night, carrying a change of clothes in his bag. For someone who was smack drunk, he sure did pack well.

From the moment you stepped out of his car, many students were around to watch. Exchanging whispers and staring, your cheeks set aflame when Chenle pulls you by the arm, your hands connecting between you and threading together naturally. It drew the attention of many onlookers and you chewed on your bottom lip, not used to the attention.

“They’re staring,” you whisper close to him.

“Let them,” He responds. Chenle tilts your head up to meet his gaze before planting a lingering kiss on your lips, confirming people’s already forming suspicions. “You’re my girl, aren’t you?”

#zhong chenle #chenle #chenle fluff #nct chenle #nct dream #nct dream fluff #nct dream scenarios #nct fluff #chenle au #nct dream au

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oswinsdolma · 3 years

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Yes, it's 2021, but I'm still not over the dark irony of Kilgharrah's final words, so I am going to analyse it, even though precisely nobody asked.

Firstly, Kilgharrah tells Merlin after his admission of failure that "all that [he has] dreamt of has come to pass". Now, obviously there is the irony of the fact that Arthur is dead, something that Merlin has been trying to prevent for the whole five seasons, yet the battle was victorious, people have seen magic as a force for good and Merlin can now be open about his gifts with his friends. However, there is an even deeper irony here that is rarely addressed, and this lies in the word "all". The problem is, that while Emrys is the entity that strives for magical inclusion and the one that fufils the prophecy. Destiny is not conscious: it doesn't understand life or death beyond the shallow ties of balance and mathematics. Yet Emrys may be a concept, and concepts need someone- or something- to take root in, and that someone happened to be Merlin.

Fundamentally, Merlin is not a bad person, but regardless of his power, his empathy, his loyalty, he is still unequivocally human. He has flaws, he has guilt, and no matter how dedicated he is to his destiny, there will always be other variables that come into play, and there is therefore no doubt that Merlin would have had other thoughts, no matter how insignificant, that lay opposed to his destiny.

Take when Freya died: Merlin was heartbroken, and in those seconds of emotion before reason took a hold once again, he may have wished, just for a moment, that Arthur and Freya's fates were reversed. And even after that, he would have hoped that one day, Arthur and Freya could live in a world where the other's existence is not a violation onto the other. And what place exists where harmony must ensue outside of the dead?

Then moving on to Balinor's death and Merlin's anguish in its aftermath: yes, he gained his powers as a dragonlord, but at the expense of a father he should have had a right to know. In that light, there is the inevitability of resentment for his gifts. Merlin would never have wanted the powers he attained had he known the price for them. And yet again, those tiny thoughts would have crept in: the wish that things could go differently, the wish that the business of dragons was not his to oversee, even at the time when his gifts were needed most. So the sick twist there is that when Merlin needed Kilgharrah, the only person who ever truly understood him despite their differences, left him alone, that wish came true.

There are hundreds of instances where Merlin's humanity prevented the prophecy from taking a favourable turn, and that, I think is what makes Merlin less a drama than a tragedy: there's the hope for a better ending combined with the constant prescence of an ending you don't want to believe. There's the fall at the ending and the warped sense of catharsis that comes with knowing that the end did come, even if it wasn't what you expected.

Following that, there is a pause in the conversation, as both characters take a second to mourn in silence, the absence of what united them showing them no longer as allies, but as friends.

Then: "no man, no matter how great, can know his destiny." This isn't so much something for Merlin to understand, but more something for the audience to hear: it's an echo of the first words we hear, and therefore a reminder that it is Kilgharrah who tells the story. Now this is an interesting narrative device in itself: why have him narrate rather than Arthur? Why Kilgharrah over Merlin or Gwen or Morgana? Take a second to imagine what it would have been like for the story to start with their voices, even if the words were the same. Especially when we know their endings, it gives the story a different tone and alludes to each of their fates in a different way. Though here is that terrible truth that the narrative comes back to every time if you analyse it far enough: each of the core four has a story, yet because of the way they were used, it will never be their story to tell. But Kilgharrah... He was just as important as the rest of them, but while the others were pawns, he was sat watching the game with a reluctant but omniescent eye, and that's what make that line hit so hard for us (aside from the fact that it is a taunting echo of the hope we had at the start). The story, while timeless, is dead, and we are all helpless spectators, hoping against hope that we are wrong about how it ends.

Furthermore, there is the fact that it is a repeat of the first words we hear when we still hold a little hope. It is that reiteration of the fact that the story will be told and retold, rewritten and loved but doomed to end in tragedy. It's an indication of the timelessness of certain tales and the permenence of endings no matter how much we want them to change, and it hits the mark every time.

Then, if it wasn't sad enough already, there is the final utterence of the phrase "once and future king". Kilgharrah says these words in hope, trusting Merlin to take it as a promise, but retrospectively there is the darkness of that line that Merlin probably knew all along, even if he didn't let himself believe it. In saying "once" rather than "now" right from the get-go, there was that quiet acknowledgement of an ending, even if it was followed by a beginning: it is yet another reminder to Merlin that he should have known, and that bittersweet reassurance that wherever he may have done, it would always have ended in disaster. Even if they both made all the right choices, the gods would have found another way to turn it down.

Okay, next let's look at "when Albion's need is greatest, Arthur will rise again". This, in all.effect, is a reiteration of the last phrase, made clearer for an audience who may need or desire reinforcement here so I'm not going to go too deep. But the thing is, Merlin already knows, at least in his heart, that it is Arthur's destiny to rise again and be the greatest king Albion has ever known. So when Kilgharrah says this, it is not a warning or a piece of advice, for perhaps the first time, it is a kindness. Merlin has been wrecked by his actions and those of all the others caught in the imperfect web spun and left to decay by the idea of Albion. It is a gentle reminder not to forget the reason for all that they have lost, and an olive branch of freedom for one who was so long enslaved.

And there again is that irony and cruel truth that while Merlin is the crucible in which that dream will be forged and has a certain autonomy over its nature, he is not a part of that dream himself, and maybe he never will be. Not unless someone lets him in, and all the people who would ever have done so are a breath too close to death for it to really count.

(I said I wasn't going to go too deep but I got carried away)(this is why my lit teacher is fed up with me)

And finally, the last line Kilgharrah says to us, perhaps the most powerful of them all: "the story that we have been a part of will live long in the minds of men". To analyse the words in this individually would be a rare insult to its complexity, but as a phrase, it evokes such an emotive response that it alone finally cements that finality in our minds. It's the cyclical acknowledgement of the audience's role in the narrative, simultaneously retracting and strengthening our suspension of belief. The one word I have used more than any other in this essay is "story" and this is why: the people who hear a tale such as this become just as important as the characters, because we are united by hope for the final chord but dreading it, because that means that the song will finally be over. Is it better for the embers to glow with tragedy or be extinguished by a deeper catharsis?

In summary, it is obvious to the naked eye that the Great Dragon's last words are loaded with meaning far beyond their initial appearance, and when you dive deeper, the web of connotations is so vast that this essay has barely scratched the surface. But the informal and perhaps most accurate theme that wa can draw from this is that none of us are over this show, no matter what we claim, because that ending really flippin' hurt, okay!?

#bbc merlin #merlin #kilgharrah #sorry for the inevitable typos and poor writing because i never proofread my essays before i post #i have a lot of feelings

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leejeongz · 3 years

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nsfw a-z JAEHYUK (treasure)

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

he forgets he even exists until you’re back to your usual, smiley, cheerful self. he becomes your slave and he is prepared to do anything for you, from cleaning you up to leaving you alone (which he never wants to do but if you want to be left alone who is he to refuse). he gets a little worried when you appear down or anxious after having sex with him the first few times but you reassure him that it’s pretty normal and that he just needs to be there for you when you need him.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

he likes his hands. he likes the way they look against your skin when he’s holding your waist and how he can get the perfect grip around your neck. his fingers are long too which makes it very easy for him to reach places 👀🤭

on you he likes your lips. he likes his own lips, sure, lips in general are really nice, yeah, but your lips are something else. feeling them against his own, how soft and gentle they are, he never wants them to leave his. the way you bite down on them when he’s giving you some amazing head too… that how he knows he’s doing something right.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

he’s a cumming inside kind of guy but obviously that’s not always possible so the next best thing is a hot facial. he likes when he’s finished all over your face and then you clean it all off the tip of his dick with your mouth too.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

he keeps a pair of your panties under his pillow for when he’s horny at night without you. you know about it, but no one else does.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

1 sexual partner. i wouldn’t term him a sex god, but he has a general idea of how to make you feel good, he may need a little direction to go off of the first few times.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

as much as he loves seeing your pretty face, hitting it from the back is his favourite position. he has total control of the situation when you’re on all fours without it seeming overpowering or oppressive. you can also get the deepest strokes from him while in this position. sometimes he gets a little shy about his facial expressions but this way he doesn’t have to be.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

you’re both still young and sex is supposed to be fun and so he makes light out of every situation to make it seem less intense. he likes tickling you and making you giggle, he likes just talking about random things even though it’s not the time or place, just to make you both feel more comfortable.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

he will keep it nice and trimmed for the most part but obviously sometimes sex can happen at unpredictable times. in those instances, it’s usually grown out, but he’s not ashamed or insecure about it.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

romance is the only thing on his mind. this guy loves whispering things into your ear, or just telling you how good you’re doing, because he wants you to feel loved and appreciated for all that you’re doing. something romantic that he does that ALWAYS catches you off guard is caressing your cheek with the back of his hand/fingers and then gently pinching your chin with his thumb and index finger to make you look at him and kiss him.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

it actually takes him a while to cum when he’s on his own, and he usually asks for your help before going anywhere else. i see him as someone who likes to feel himself when he’s doing it, like he’ll use oil and drip it all over his naked body while sitting on his gaming chair.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

sensory deprivation (giving and receiving)- it’s rare that you two don’t have vanilla sex, but blindfolds are something that you incorporate into almost every scene. he loves putting them onto you or wearing them to show a trusting relationship between the two of you. although some intimacy may feel lost because you can’t look into each other’s eyes, it means that every little action feels electric, and that is wayyy better for you two in the moment. you know each other's likes and dislikes and use those to THEIR advantage for sure.

breeding- okay i already said he likes cumming inside so there’s that. but it’s also because he’s so possessive. and he wants to hear you beg for his hot cum inside you too. or for you to ride him and not stop until he releases inside you.

praise (giving and receiving)- as i mentioned above he loves to tell you how good you’re making him feel, how well you’re taking him, how pretty you look. he wants you to feel good in the moment because he feels that way too. he also loves when you tell him how good he’s making you feel.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

so it has to be private first of all, i don’t see him getting freaky anywhere that you two can get caught. i’m guessing his ultimate favourite place is just in bed, but he’s not opposed to some action in the kitchen on the counter when he knows no one will hear or interrupt, or even on the sofa when he doesn’t think you two can make it to the bedroom.

he’s also keen to try out a little something special, maybe in the bath. where you two start having an innocent yet romantic bath, that slowly turns into something more. but he spends too long trying to figure out how it would work and decides it is too much hassle than it’s worth.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

as boring as this sounds… the thing that turns him on the most is kissing you. he pulls away from intense kisses with the biggest, hopeful smile on his face. your lips really have that effect on him.

he likes when you dirty talk and when you attempt to take the lead from the get go. the phrase that gets him the most turned on is “i want you in my mouth”. your enthusiasm is SUCH A HUGE TURN ON.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

no hook ups, casual sex or one night stands. he has to be in a relationship with you and you guys have probably been dating for a while before anything happens anyway.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

prefers to receive but is extremely good at eating you out. he’s not shy and will go straight for it after using his fingers just to get you a little wet to begin with. he likes to smile while he’s down there, he knows that you know when he’s doing that and that you like it so of course he’s going to.

when it comes to receiving he enjoys enough to make him want to repay you almost immediately. he doesn’t really know what to do with his hands, whether they should be on your head or his, but he can’t control them anyway because he’s so into your sucking his dick.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

more on the fast and rough end of the scale. he can’t bear being slow, that’s just teasing himself really. but usually after he’s cum, he does a few extremely slow strokes, just to make sure his cum is in and that it’s all in there.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

not a fan. at all. doesn’t want to get caught, doesn’t want one person to feel left out of the pleasure bc that’s usually what happens, doesn’t want to rush anything. if he’s feeling horny at an inconvenient time of the day, or if you are, you usually just agree to wait.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

not really. he’s almost always vanilla, with a slight teeny tiny bit of light bdsm thrown in (d/s, handcuffs, blindfolds (occasionally)) and so he doesn’t really like venturing out of his comfort zone. if you share the same wants as him, that’s perfect. if you wanna be a little more adventurous, it’s going to take a lot of convincing and he has to trust you.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

2 rounds maximum. most of the time only 1 because he’s tired and just wants cuddles after releasing a load lol. can go for 2 but it’s very rare and would take a lot of you turning him on to get him to do it twice.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

no toys when he’s around. he does not like the idea of being replaced by a toy, anything that a toy can do, he can do too, that’s his thoughts on the matter. he doesn’t want to use them on himself either, isn’t even willing to try because he’s told himself that he won’t like it.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

he slowly reveals to you that he’s a big ol tease. and you’re not getting away with anything just because you want to, he might have let you before, but not now. he likes to be teased too, but just so you know, you’re getting punished for doing it.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

okay this boy is LOUD. at first, he tries to be real quiet, then once a small whisper espcapes he’s just like fuck it and it slowly starts building up to a very… audible session.

he’s definitely one to talk during sex, not even just dirty talk, he will literally talk about anything lmao. but he always announces before he finishes, he repeats “i’m cumming” or “i’m going to cum” multiple times before actually doing so. you actually start finding it kind of cute and endearing.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

did i mention he’s a big fan of kissing lol. he embraces any and all types of kisses and it’s very gentle and delicate. sometimes (when you’re really taking him there) they become super hungry and he somehow manages to back you into the nearest thing, whether that’s the wall or the bed etc. that’s the first real sign that he’s horny.

honestly, i don’t think he’s that shy about talking about your sex lives with anyone. like he’ll offer advice and share his experiences with anyone willing to listen if you say he can, just because he empathises with those who might be nervous or on edge to try something.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

he’s blessed what can i say? he’s longer than average and thicker than average AND knows how to use it (eventually). every inch of him is perfect and “down there” is no different. of course he’s vvv proud of his dick size and doesn’t hesitate to bring it up, but he actually kind of feels sorry for you having to take it all.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

when you first get into a relationship, although it’s quite high, he can control it so much so that it appears to you that it’s low. but soon you learn that he wants pussy every other day.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

if you let him, he’d be asleep straight away lmao, but only if he could have his arms around you of course. but if you wanna stay up for a bit, he’s down. he hates morning sex because he’s too tired to go a whole day afterwards loool.

#smut #treasure smut #treasure imagines #jaehyuk #yoon jaehyuk #jaehyuk smut #yoon jaehyuk smut

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yuta-nakamots · 3 years

Text

baby don’t like it - j.jh

Pairings - Idol!Jaehyun x Idol!Reader, Idol!Yuta x Idol!Reader

Genre - Idol!AU, Smut, Fluff, Slight Angst

Warnings - y/n is a cheater, phone sex/sexting, unprotected sex, cumshot

Summary - Relationships can get messy as seen by the way you’ve managed to fuck up one that you weren’t even officially in to begin with but at least your boyfriend seems pretty supportive of it all.

Word Count - 9.8k

A/N - Tagging @hunjins and @spookyhyuck who make their own guest appearances. This was originally supposed to be strictly a Jaehyun fic but then things got out of hand when I was writing for Yuta ahaha never trust me and Yuta like this.

Part of the 23 Days of Christmas Event hosted by @neosmutcollective. Check out the masterlist here.

After becoming an idol, there was a part of you that thought that you’d never find love and end up settling with raising a bunch of cats instead but somehow you had the luck of catching the eye of none other than Nakamoto Yuta when both of your groups were promoting alongside each other.

He had approached you first and blatantly told you that he would like to get to know you better and things quickly progressed from there. He took you on dates to so many nice places and it was like you had found your kindred spirit in him. It only felt right when he asked you to be his girlfriend.

In a little under a year, you found that the only drawback from dating him was that he was always busy. It may not seem that way to the public but he was constantly at work preparing things for future releases and you made sure to praise him for how well he dealt with the sheer amount of content he had to put out. Such situations led to a decrease in time for dates and having to settle for late night phone calls instead.

“I forgot to tell you that me and some of my other group mates were asked to be on a variety cooking show this week,” you excitedly told Yuta over the call, “it’s the one where the two groups compete against each other and do challenges periodically.”

You heard the familiar beep of Yuta’s water dispenser as he filled up yet another cup, clueless as to where his original cup went. “I think Jaehyun mentioned something about going on the show. Are you guys filming tomorrow?” Unsure of your schedule you checked your messages with your manager and confirmed with Yuta that you were indeed filming with his members. “I don’t know which other members are going but I can ask and let you know.”

“Oh, it’s okay, you don’t have to.” You told him, not wanting him to go out of the way for you.

Yuta chuckled on the other end of the line. “Just trying to make sure you’re prepared for whoever you’ll be working with.”

You shook your head though you realized he couldn’t see you anyways. “I don’t think they’ll be able to tell that we’re together from just seeing me cook, you know. It’s not like you’re there for me to stare at.”

“I’m flattered to know that you’d stare at me if I were there,” you heard him pick up his cup and open the refrigerator, most likely looking for a snack, “but keep your guard up anyways. You never know if they’ll mention my name or something like that.”

“If they mention your name it’s probably to tease your cooking abilities-”

“Are you saying I’m a bad cook? Because I can assure you that I am not.” Yuta defended with a huff as he closed the refrigerator, a telltale sign that he could not find anything of interest in there.

“I didn’t say that but if that’s what you think I was saying then sure.”

“Yeah yeah, whatever,” you could practically see him rolling his eyes, “I have to sleep soon since we have some photo shoot tomorrow and they didn’t like it when I came in all tired-looking last time.” He mumbled something about his dark circles starting to show more as he’s getting older. “Make sure you do some cooking research though,” he advises, “Jaehyun’s a really good cook so you’ll have some competition tomorrow.”

“Mmm okay, whatever you say,” sass evident in your voice, “I have faith in my members though so prepare to watch your own groupmates get shut down.”

Yuta quietly chuckled and you heard him flop into his bed. “Alright, love, I’ll get ready to see that,” he paused to adjust himself under his covers, “but no matter the result I’m sure the episode will come out okay because you’re there and I know you’ll do great.”

You smiled at his sweet comment. “Thank you, I trust that your other members will take good care of us too.”

“Oh, I wouldn’t be too sure of that,” Yuta jokes, “but again, I know you’ll do a good job on the show, have fun at filming tomorrow, I love you.”

“Good luck at the photo shoot, I love you too, goodnight.” With that, you hung up, already halfway to sleep yourself since you were only really safe to talk to Yuta at late hours of the night, not wanting to alert any of yours or his group mates to the status of your relationship together.

In the waiting room on set, you finally had some time to check your phone after a hectic morning of mapping out with your groupmates, Ivet and Liv, your game plan for the show. It was decided that the three of you would be making a type of mixed ramen with whatever spices and other ingredients you were able to win though you’d have to be careful and keep enough stuff in reserve to make side dishes. Looking at your phone, you saw that Yuta had sent you a few messages in the midst of all the chaos.

Yuta > y/n

8:23am: jaehyun said it’s him, johnny, doyoung, and haechan filming today

8:24am: i hope you prepared well because they certainly did

8:24am: i’d spoil their plans but that wouldn’t be as fun haha

8:25am: watch out for haechan and jaehyun though, they’re planning on distracting you guys

8:25am: i have to leave for my shoot now but keep me updated on how it goes!

y/n > Yuta

9:16am: i’m in the waiting room right now, sorry it took so long to reply

9:17am: but really? They just had to send the most competitive guys huh?

9:17am: i’m not gonna spoil our plans either so you’re gonna have to watch the episode to see what we came up with ;)

You group mate Ivet called out your name from the doorway, “we’re starting soon, you better come join us on set.”

“Coming.” You shouted back as you tucked your phone away into your bag and made sure your microphone pack was wired up correctly.

Once you were out on set, Yuta’s members came out shortly after and filming started. Everything was going smoothly, the group introductions went nicely and it was finally time for the starting challenge. All seven of you were on edge since this was one of the most important parts of creating a successful main dish.

“First on the table, we have udon noodles, salmon, and a loaf of bread.” The host announced, pulling the cloth off the table on the side in the middle of where all the rest of the cooking ingredients were.

“Oh my god we have to get the noodles.” Liv whispered to you, gripping your forearm as the challenge was about to be revealed.

“In order to win these, the challenger must do a dance from the opposing group and be deemed successful by at least two members. The first person to yell out their name may challenge on the count of 3. 1, 2 ,3.”

You shot up from your seat as soon as possible, yelling your name and shouting over Haechan calling out his own, confident in your abilities to dance an NCT song after watching fancams of your boyfriend a little too much. “I’ll dance to Work It.” You stated, mentally going over the choreography in your head.

The music began playing from a little before the chorus and you turned to face the cameras in the front, winking at the most centered one as you mouthed ‘work it’ and started dancing. You heard your groupmates erupt in screams from behind you along with side comments from the guys of ‘oh, she’s pretty good’ and ‘not bad, not bad’.

You ended the dance with a cute pose before returning to your seat next to your members. “Y/n how do you even know the dance to that song?” Ivet asked, totally in shock.

Shrugging your shoulders you replied, “it’s a cool song so I watched their videos a couple times and just picked up the dance along the way.”

“Nah, there’s no way you learned it just like that,” Liv interjected, “you’re so slow at picking up choreo, I know you must have purposely learned this.” Again, you shrugged your shoulders, readjusting the wire of the microphone that got jostled around while you were dancing.

“Johnny, Doyoung, Jaehyun, Haechan, what do you think?” The host prompted.

Johnny was the first to speak up. “I’m in the unit that promoted this song so I know the choreo the best out of us here today,” he stated to the host, “so personally, I’ll be a little more strict about details since the others don’t know the dance that well.”

He looked over at you as he began critiquing your performance. “You had good energy but you were putting emphasis on the wrong parts. It’s the second half of the phrase that should look more cool and chic rather than the first half.” He danced it himself to show you what he meant before turning back to the host. “I do not deem it as a pass but I liked her energy as she was doing it.”

“He’s so annoying.” Liv muttered under her breath. You put a hand on her knee in an attempt to calm her down.

Doyoung spoke up next as Johnny was sitting down. “She’s not a member of our group so we shouldn’t expect her to know all the little things. I think she should pass.”

“I don’t think she should,” Haechan interrupted, “the detail is what makes the dance memorable and unique from other dances like it and since that’s how our members performed it, if she’s supposed to be similar then she should do it the same way.”

“Ah, it’s a pity that we don’t have someone else from the unit here who could offer a more fair vote,” Doyoung commented, “Yuta would be better at this.” You felt your heart stop for a split second at the mention of your boyfriend.

“That’s one vote for pass and two votes for fail. Jaehyun, what is your vote?” The host doled out.

Jaehyun cleared his throat before speaking, looking over at you with a shy smile. “I think y/n did good, actually-” Ivet let out a shout of joy, since that meant you won the first batch of ingredients, before quickly covering her mouth out of embarrassment. “Like Doyoung said, she’s not a member of our group so she wouldn’t know the details. Y/n had the same energy and feel that our members did and I think that’s the most important part.”

“Alright, so with that, the members of NCT have deemed this challenge as a success. Congratulations to y/n for winning the first ingredients, you may all start preparing your dishes.” You smiled over to the four of them, thanking them as you collected your prize.

As you set down the large packages on the counter, Ivet nudges you with her elbow. “Hey, Jaehyun keeps looking over here. Should we give him something? I feel kind of bad since he basically allowed us to win.”

You looked up and sure enough, Jaehyun was staring right at you. He smiled at you as the two of you made eye contact before shyly turning away and busying himself in conversation with his members on what spices were available and what their best options were. “Should we give them the salmon? We really only need the noodles and we can save the bread to make a small desert.” You proposed to your groupmates.

“Wait, why are we giving them our prize?” Liv questioned as she started opening up the udon noodles.

“I’m just trying to be nice.” You mumbled, grabbing a bowl for the noodles. “I don’t want us to look mean if we just hog everything and let them suffer, you know?”

Liv shook her head, “ugh, fine. Give them the salmon but tell them not to expect any more help from us. This is a competition, y/n.”

You roll your eyes at her before picking up the slab of salmon, telling her “it’s not like we know how to prepare fish anyways” as you leave to hand it over.

As you approach them, Johnny notices you first. “Hey hey hey, no stealing our ideas.”

“I wasn’t planning on it,” you tell him, “I just came over to give this to you guys since we don’t plan on using it.”

“Thank you-” Doyoung began, only to get cut off by Haechan.

“Don’t accept help from the enemy!” He exclaimed.

You raised an eyebrow at them. “Take it or leave it.”

Haechan opened his mouth to speak but Jaehyun beat him to it. “We’ll take it. Thank you, y/n.” The smile he gave you was so cute, you couldn’t help but feel the slightest bit charmed by him and his dimples.

After a few more challenges, both teams had a pretty even amount of supplies and your groups’ preparations for the soup broth and impromptu chocolate bread pudding desert are underway. As for the opposing team, they had decided on making salmon rolls along with a fruit parfait using the other ingredients they had won.

While you were breaking apart the bread into smaller pieces for the pudding and your members gathered the necessary baking ingredients, Jaehyun stopped by on his way to the pantry area where your members currently were. “Need any help?” His low voice coming from behind you causing you to jump.

“N-no, I’m fine,” you stuttered, trying to calm your now racing pulse though you’re not sure if it was because he scared you or from how close he was to you, “shouldn’t you be helping your own team?”

“Yeah but there’s four of us and three of you, it’s a little unfair to you guys.” He nodded his head over to where Ivet and Liv were arguing about whether to use white or brown sugar.

You scoffed at him. “Excuse me, but we are fully capable of pulling off this win. Thank you for the offer, but no, I do not want your help.” You noticed the slight smile he had on his face as he backed away and you realized that you had stopped tearing apart the bread while you were talking to him.

“Hey! I know your plan,” you called out, “I won’t be distracted by you again so watch it.” He giggled as he returned to his members, your own giving him death stares after hearing your exchange with him.

Not much else happened after the final challenges and as both teams approached the final stages of preparation, you noticed the glances going back and forth between both groups and they observed the activity and progress of the opponent. You caught Jaehyun looking at you a couple times and made faces at him to mock him, which he made back.

“Stop flirting with him, you guys are so obvious oh my gosh.” Ivet muttered.

You let out a gasp of shock. “What do you mean flirting? I am not flirting with him at all.”

“Yes you are,” she rolls her eyes in irritation, “I see all the faces you guys are making at each other and I’m pretty sure the other guys noticed it too.”

“Well then that means you’re distracted too if you’re watching us.” You shot back.

“Oh, just shut up and get back to work.” Liv huffed. “If you’re dating him you can just tell us, you know.”

You froze as you thought of Yuta. “I am not dating Jaehyun.” You said through gritted teeth.

“It sure seems like it thought.” Ivet retorted.

Once time ran out, both teams presented their dishes to the production staff who would be voting on the winner for today. Your team presented first as per Johnny’s request of ‘ladies first’. They seemed to like your dishes so you were fairly confident in your chances of winning.

When the boys came to present their dishes you were honestly shocked at how good the food looked. You had to give credit to Doyoung who took charge of most of it. “Johnny and Haechan worked on the fruit parfait while Jaehyun and I made the salmon rolls from our memory of making it with our member Yuta back when he shared his mother’s techniques with us.”

You couldn’t help but smile at the thought of Yuta trying to direct his members around in the kitchen since he rarely ever cooks in the first place. “Why are you smiling like that?” Ivet asks, snapping you out of your imagination. “Are you looking at Jaehyun again?” You reach over and pinch her side, effectively shutting her up.

As the production staff gathers up their votes, both teams are given time to make their closing comments. Liv spoke for your group since she was the oldest out of the three of you. “We had a lot of fun today getting to cook with each other and we would like to thank all the members of NCT and all the staff who worked with us today. It was a pleasure to be able to come on to this show and we hope to be back again soon.”

Haechan stepped forward to speak for his members. “We too enjoyed being on the show today and we would also like to thank our competitors and the staff for taking such good care of us. It was a new experience to get to do something like this and I hope NCT can come on again with and show the talents of the rest of our members.”

“Any other closing comments?” The host asked.

“As a fan of NCT, it was an honor to work with you guys today and I hope we will get to work together again in the future.” Ivet blurted out, making the studio burst out in laughter from how quick she spoke and the way she covered her face again.

“I really enjoyed getting to know y/n, Ivet, and Liv today and I look forward to working with you guys again no matter what it may be.” Jaehyun quickly said, taking the attention off of Ivet.

“I think the staff have counted up their votes and are ready to announce the winner for today.” The host announced, wrapping up the conversation. “And now, the dishes that won the hearts of the staff are…”

You reached to hold the hands of your group mates as the director wrote on a whiteboard. When they flipped it around, you let out a breath of relief as you read the winning dish. “The udon and the bread pudding! Congratulations to Liv, y/n, and Ivet for being the champions of this episode.”

Liv pulled the two of you in for a hug as you all celebrated your victory meanwhile Haechan came to the front and was asking the staff if they’re sure they counted the votes correctly as his older members laughed behind him.

Filming ends and both teams head back to their respective waiting rooms. You stopped by the bathroom first before joining your members but on your way out you ran straight into Jaehyun. “Sorry, I wasn’t being careful.” You apologize, moving out of his way and continuing on your path.

“Oh, it’s okay, and actually, I was looking for you so it’s more than okay. I mean not more than okay but I mean that it’s-”

“Jaehyun, why were you looking for me?” You ask, successfully saving him from his rambling and future embarrassment.

He reaches a hand behind his neck as the other goes inside his back pocket while his eyes flit around nervously. “I, um, I was going to ask you for your number if that’s okay with you.”

Your brain went into overdrive as you thought about your options. You could say no to be safe though it might draw suspicion since everyone saw how the two of you were interacting earlier. Or you could give it to him and tell him to keep things on the low though it makes another opening for someone to find out about you and Yuta.

“Yeah, sure.” You tell him and you watch as he breaks into a smile, his dimples showing once again. The two of you quickly exchanged numbers before heading off to your own members. On the way back to your dorm, you received a message from an unknown number.

Unknown > y/n

5:58pm: hi, this is jaehyun :)

y/n > unknown

5:59pm: hey, it’s y/n

You saw him start typing but you exited his chat to send a message to your boyfriend instead telling him how your day went.

y/n > Yuta

6:00pm: i beat your members just like i said i would ;)

Yuta > y/n

6:00pm: haha congratulations!

6:00pm: I’ll look forward to watching the episode when it comes out

6:00pm: I paused my anime episode just for you, consider yourself blessed

y/n > Yuta

6:01pm: yeah okay, i’m blessed by nakamoto yuta or whatever lol

6:01pm: did you want to call tonight?

Yuta > y/n

6:01pm: no, i got a headache during the shoot so I’m gonna sleep early tonight

6:01pm: tomorrow we can. I don’t think I have anything

y/n > Yuta

6:02pm: awwww, my baby

6:02pm: i hope you feel better soon <3

6:02pm: get some sleep and we can figure it out when you wake up

6:02pm: i love you

Yuta > y/n

6:03pm: don’t call me that

6:03pm: but thank you love you too

Jaehyun had been sending you messages while you were texting Yuta so you finally went back to your chat with him, feeling the excitement of talking to your boyfriend leave you.

Jaehyun > y/n

6:01pm: i just wanted to say that i thought you looked really pretty today

6:01pm: not that you don’t look pretty everyday but you know what I mean

6:02pm: i’m actually a fan of your group so today was really fun for me

6:03pm: did you maybe want to meet up sometime and get lunch?

y/n > Jaehyun

6:04pm: thank you, you’re quite handsome yourself

6:05pm: we’re actually working on a comeback so i don’t really have too much time these days

Jaehyun > y/n

6:06pm: oh? What’s the album like?

y/n > Jaehyun

6:08pm: we’re going for a darker concept this time

Jaehyun > y/n

6:09pm: that sounds fun!

When you didn’t see him typing again, you closed out the app and went to watch an episode of the anime Yuta had recommended to you a while ago. Jaehyun didn’t text you back for the rest of the night.

You went for the next day without texting your boyfriend but since you didn’t have any activities scheduled for the day, you binge watched nearly a whole season of the anime he had recommended to you until he finally texted you in the evening.

Yuta > y/n

7:16pm: i don’t think i can call tonight. I didn’t finish my chinese homework sorry

7:17pm: i want to talk to you so fucking bad though

7:17pm: i really miss seeing you and getting to touch you

y/n > Yuta

7:18pm: wait hold on

7:18pm: how do you go from talking about learning chinese to being all whiny

Yuta > y/n

7:19pm: it’s because

7:20pm: i miss you

7:20pm: and i’m horny

You were glad you were just lying down in bed because you weren’t expecting him to send you a picture of his bulge, the outline of his hard cock obvious in the soccer shorts he was wearing.

y/n > Yuta

7:23pm: you can’t just send that without a warning!

7:23pm: what if i was doing something huh?

7:23pm: are you even wearing underwear??

Yuta > y/n

7:24pm: no heehee

7:24pm: wanna see?

7:24pm: i know the answer is yes ;)

He sent you another picture that looked almost entirely black but when you opened it, you were greeted with the sight of your boyfriend seated at his desk with his legs open and facing towards the mirror by his closet. He had pulled the fabric of one leg of his shorts over his dick, exposing it to you with his free hand wrapped around the middle of it.

y/n > Yuta

7:28pm: what if the answer was no

Yuta > y/n

7:28pm: well you took an awfully long time to respond so i know you like it

y/n > Yuta

7:29pm: shut up or you’re not getting one back

You smiled to yourself as you saw the typing bubble disappear before sitting up and pulling your shirt off. You held your phone up and covered your nipples with your free arm, effectively pushing your breasts up as you bit your lip seductively.

Taking a couple with a variation of angles, poses, and facial expression, you sent the first one and waited for a response. He didn’t respond when you thought he would so you cleared the app and reopened it again realizing that the picture didn’t send so you sent it again.

Yuta > y/n

7:36pm: you’re so fucking hot

7:36pm: i can’t believe i get to call you mine

7:37pm: you’re literally a goddess

7:37pm: fuck can you send another one. I’ll send a voice recording

You sent him the rest of the ones you took and within a minute he sent you another picture of him accompanied by an audio message. Opening the picture first, you noticed how much more red his cock was, the veins more prominent than before. Your mouth watered at the sight of his length and the shine of precum at his tip. He had pulled up his shirt, revealing his abs and navel piercing, his hand tight around the base of his cock.

Making sure your earbuds were connected, you hit play on the voice message. “Y/n, baby, I miss you so fucking much. I wish we were together right now. I’d fuck you so hard that you’d only be able to say my name.” You reached a hand into your underwear as you heard him start moving his hand on his dick.

You inserted two digits in and started fingering yourself to his words. “I miss how warm your pussy is around me. I miss the way you moan when I fuck you just the way you like it. I miss feeling you cum on my cock and the way you take me so well.” Your fingers were in no way close in length or thickness to his cock but you hadn’t gotten off in so long that it wasn’t hard to get yourself worked up.

Yuta’s voice choked up in the recording for a bit and he let out a moan. “I-I miss seeing you so full and dripping with my cum. Fuck, I need to cum so badly.” You pressed your fingers as deep as they could go and you felt your pleasure starting to build.

You opened your camera and recorded yourself with your fingers deep inside of your pussy, you hand getting covered with your juices. “My fingers aren’t anything like your cock. I miss how good you fuck me and how deep your reach inside of me.” You paused as you brought your phone closer to your glistening folds.

“I love the way you make me cum and the way you fill me up so good.” You brought your phone back up, to get your face and naked torso in view. “Cum for me, Yuta.”

You continued fingering yourself to the voice recording he sent until you received a video from him. As soon as you opened it, his hand was already picking up speed on his length. “You miss my cock, baby? You miss cumming on it?” He let out a groan as he played with the tip of his length, his hand becoming slick with his own precum.

“Fuck, I’m so hard right now and it’s all because of you. I can’t wait to fuck you senseless the next time I see you. I-Fuck,” he started rapidly jerking himself off, “I want you to cum for me. I want to fill you up with my cum and watch it drip out of you. Ah fuck-” you watched as he covered himself in his own cum. On his abs, his hand, his thighs, and you felt a surge of arousal as you watched it drip down over his body, making his skin glow.

You dropped your phone in your haste to record yourself cumming for him and when you picked it up, you saw the picture that you sent earlier but not the video and previous messages from Yuta. Looking up at the name at the top of your screen, you broke out into a state of panicking realizing it wasn’t Yuta that you had sent the picture to. It was Jaehyun.

Jaehyun > y/n

7:37pm: damn. I didn’t know you were so sexy

7:38pm: i also didn’t know you were one to send nudes but i’m not one to say anything

y/n > Jaehyun

7:38pm: oh? You don’t seem like it either

Jaehyun > y/n

7:38pm: want proof?

y/n > Jaehyun

7:38pm: sure

You went back into your chat with Yuta, not wanting him to worry about you or question why you were taking so long to respond to him.

y/n > Yuta

7:39pm: fuck i thought i recorded myself cumming for you but i guess i didn’t hit record

7:40pm: i’m sorry :’(

Yuta > y/n

7:40pm: ah, it’s okay, as long as i know you came, I'm satisfied

7:41pm: besides, i have like four more pictures to look at when I feel lonely now

y/n > Yuta

7:41pm: ugh you’re so weird

7:42pm: but i kind of have a headache now so i think i’m gonna go to sleep soon

Yuta > y/n

7:43pm: i’m weird and you like it

7:43pm: go to sleep if you’re not feeling good though. Text me when you wake up

7:43pm: sleep well, i love you <3

y/n > Yuta

7:44pm: thanks, love you too

Checking back in on your chat with Jaehyun, you were surprised to see that he had actually sent you a photo. He was only in his underwear as he stood in front of his mirror in a similar setup to that of your boyfriend’s. He had raised one eyebrow and his tongue poked the inside of his cheek while he grabbed at the outline of his clothed cock.

y/n > Jaehyun

7:46pm: you’re pretty sexy too, i must admit

Jaehyun > y/n

7:46pm: like what you see?

y/n > Jaehyun

7:47pm: hell yeah i do

You felt a sudden rush of anxiety and worried about what Yuta would think if he found out about you and Jaehyun so you muted your notifications from Jaehyun and left your phone to charge as you took a shower.

Ever since that night where you accidentally sent Jaehyun a picture of yourself, the two of you have been texting on the down low. You hadn’t told Yuta because you were afraid of ruining your relationship with him or getting in the way of his relationship with Jaehyun.

Honestly, you just hoped Jaehyun would lose interest in you and find a new girl so you could let this whole thing be put to rest and tell Yuta once you were ready. But for now you entertained Jaehyun because you didn’t want things to be awkward the next time you saw him, especially now that the end of year award shows were approaching and you’d probably run into him somewhere at an event like that.

One of the award shows your group was set to attend was in Tokyo and Yuta had informed you that NCT would also be attending. “You know, since we’ll both be in Japan soon, how about I take you out on a date after the festival ends?” He proposed over another late night call.

“I like the sound of that,” a smile on your face as you spoke, “when are you leaving?”

“I leave the day after tomorrow. How about you?”

“I leave tomorrow so I guess I’ll be getting to the hotel before you.”

“Are you sharing a room with anyone?”

“Yeah, probably. You?”

“No, they gave us our own rooms this time around,” Yuta paused as he giggled, “you know what that means?”

You let out a similar giggle at how cute your boyfriend was. “Sexy time?”

“You know it.” You swore you could see him smirking through the phone. “But I’ll text you my room number once I get there so you can come by and we can plan out a day for me to take you out.”

“Sounds good-”

“Hey Yuta- oh, sorry. Are you talking to someone?” You heard the unmistakable sound of Jaehyun’s voice.

“Uh, yeah,” Yuta started, his voice showing how unsure he was, “just talking to a friend in Japan that I’m thinking of meeting while we’re there.”

Jaehyun let out what sounded like a noise of approval. “Oh, okay. I needed to ask you something but I’ll come back later.” You heard the door close as he left.

“Gosh, that guy,” Yuta breathed out once he was gone, “he’s been acting differently lately. I just don’t know what’s up with him. He’s always on his phone these days.”

You let out a light laugh. “You sound like an old man, Yuta. Though I should get going now in case he comes back.”

“Yes, you’re right. But, don’t forget, Japan, room number, then come over. Okay?”

“Okay, love you.”

“Love you too. Can’t wait to be with you again.”

Currently, you were dressed in sweats and one of Yuta’s shirts, even though you’ve had it for nearly four months now, after a day of just touring the hotel and performance venue as other idols began arriving. You were sure Yuta’s plane landed two hours ago so he should be at the hotel already but he hadn’t texted yet and you had started dozing off which made you worried that you’d fall asleep without seeing him. Just in case he forgot, you decided to send him a message asking what room he’s in.

You felt your phone vibrate after what felt like a minute but when you saw the time, you realized you had fallen asleep for about an hour. Reading the message on the screen, you saw the room number 412 and pulled yourself out of bed, making sure to grab your key card before you left.

When you arrived at room 412, you knocked on the door excitedly knowing that Yuta was waiting on the other side and you were more than ready to tackle him in a hug after not seeing him for nearly three months because of his own group promotions. What you didn’t expect was for Jaehyun to appear instead, shirtless with only a pair of sweatpants on.

You both stared at each other in shock before Jaehyun pulled you in, looking both ways to make sure no one saw the two of you. Once the door was shut he stepped away and asked “so, why exactly did you ask for my room number and come over this late at night?”

“I-uh, hm.” You didn’t know how to get yourself out of this but the way Jaehyun was looking at you told you that you wouldn’t be able to leave until both of you were exhausted.

“I take it that you were tired of just looking at a screen and wanted to experience the real thing in person.” He looked at you with an eyebrow raised. “Because I sure do.”

You saw the opportunity he was giving you and took it. “I like the way you think,” you closed the distance between both of you, “just don’t you dare tell anyone we’re doing this and I won’t either.”

“My lips are sealed,” he promised, giving you a playful smile, “with yours!” His arms wrapped around you as he pulled you in, greeting your lips with a warm kiss. You quickly melted into his kiss, one of your hands coming to rest on his firm chest. “Bed?” You nod and let him lead you to his queen sized bed.

He sits and falls backward on the side of his bed, pulling you to rest over him before kissing you once more. Your hands tangle themselves in his soft hair while his hands make their way to your ass, gripping your cheeks firmly before gently kneading at them. You shift your thigh to rest comfortably between his and that’s when you feel his length, already hot and hard beneath you. “You’re this worked up already?”

“I could see the outline of your nipples through your shirt and I just couldn’t stop my mind, sorry.” His cheeks started turning pink as you gave him an accusatory glare.

You shook your head before sliding a hand down over his chest, stopping at his solid abs. “I’m only forgiving you because you’re cute and sexy, but look at my eyes next time you pervert.”

“Yes ma’am oh-” He gasped when your hand went under the waistband of his sweatpants and started playing with the head of his cock. “Fuck that feels so good.”

You felt him twitch under your grasp and you realized just how large he was. “You’re fucking huge.” Your hand traveled further down his length. “I knew you were big but I didn’t know you were this big.”

“You wanna see it?” He teased though he threw his head back and moaned when you rubbed the tip of his cock.

Satisfied with his reaction, you pulled his sweats down and he lifted his hips to help you, his hard length hitting his chiseled body as he sunk back into the bed. Jaehyun let out a sigh of relief as your hand wrapped around his member and you felt it twitch within your grasp, causing you to meet his eyes with a smile.

You noticed his ears turning a light shade of pink as you sat back on your knees to pull off your own shirt, which you remembered actually belonged to your loving boyfriend, throwing it to the side and nodding at the man in front of you as an invitation from the way his eyes were suddenly glued to your breasts.

He sat up and pulled you into his lap, attaching his lips to your sensitive buds, alternating between kissing them and gently sucking on them as he teased them with his tongue. Your arm came to rest around his broad shoulders and you rested your cheek against his soft hair. You reached down to tease at the tip of his cock once more, letting out a noise of surprise as Jaehyun lightly bit into the skin of your breast. “What was that for?”

“It’s sensitive, you know.” He looked up at you, his hair falling into his eyes as he left kisses up your chest and neck while cupping and kneading at your breasts.

Brushing his hair away from his face, you told him “yes I do know, but I can’t do much else when you’ve got me stuck like this.”

His lips pulled away from your breast with a pop and he slid down beneath you so that he was laying down once again, his aching length practically begging for attention. “Here, ride me then.”

Giving him a devilish smile, you leaned off to the side to slide your own sweats and underwear off before seating yourself mere inches above his warm pulsing cock, lining it up with your entrance and slowly sinking down on it. You nearly got goosebumps from the way he filled you, the stretch stinging in the most pleasurable way.

You let out a moan as you fell forward, your hands landing upon his firm chest, bracing you as you began slowly moving on his length. Jaehyun groaned as you rose up to the point where only the head of his member was inside of you before lowering yourself back down, sheathing his cock in your warmth.

His hands found their way to your hips and he helped to guide your movements as you began to speed up, enjoying the way his length seemed to hit all the right spots. You threw your head back as Jaehyun began meeting your movements, his hips thrusting up from below you, pushing himself even deeper into your core.

Even when it was reaching the edge of being too much, causing you to stop your motions, he continued rocking his hips into you and went even harder when he noticed your still frame above him with your eyes shut in pleasure. “Babygirl enjoying my cock that much?”

“Shut up and just fuck me, Jaehyun.” Had your eyes been open, you would’ve seen the shit-eating grin that appeared on his face before he caged you in his arms and flipped the two of you over, his length never once leaving your warm walls.

You gasped as your back fell onto the bed, your legs unintentionally wrapping around his waist, bringing him even closer to you and burying his cock even deeper inside of you. Jaehyun braced himself on his forearms as he began thrusting into you, his face nuzzled into the crook of your neck, his breath tickling your shoulder with every exhale.

The new position allowed him to adjust the speed to his liking, which was considerably faster than before, leaving you a moaning mess with one hand gripping onto his bicep and the other on his abs. The room was filled with the sounds of skin against skin and his lips on yours, the latter effectively muting the noises that either of you made.

When Jaehyun thrusted particularly hard, you accidentally bit into his plump bottom lip, causing him to let out a grunt before he pulled away and slowed down his movements. “You good?”

“Yeah, sorry, didn’t mean to bite you.” You apologized, your eyes falling from his face down to where his member was still dipping inside of you.

“Guess we’re even then.” He remarked playfully as he grabbed your calves from around his waist and brought them to rest upon his shoulder.

You breathed out a single “fuck” from the way the new angle allowed him to hit different spots in you. You were just about nearing your orgasm and could tell Jaehyun was too from the way you could feel his length twitching within your walls when your phone suddenly rang.

Jaehyun paused as you reached over to grab your phone from the nightstand, only gently pushing into you as you read the caller ID. “Who is it?” He asked, a slight smile appearing on his face.

“My, -uh, roommate,” you tell him, instead of reading Yuta’s name that was currently lighting up the screen, still fighting to keep your volume down as he continues rolling his hips into you.

“Answer it.”

“What? No way.”

“Go ahead, answer it.”

You shoot him a look and he pulls out nearly all the way with an eyebrow raised at you, threatening to answer the call. Huffing out of indignance, you accept the call and raise the phone to your ear after making sure the volume was as low as possible.

“He-hello?”

You hear Yuta’s voice over the line as Jaehyun starts to slowly rut into you once more. “Where are you?”

“I’m with my manager right now-” you nearly moan from Jaehyun purposely thrusting long and hard into you, but cover it by clearing your throat, “talking about the schedule for tomorrow.” Your voice raised at the end as Jaehyun delivered another powerful stroke.

“Are you okay?” Yuta questioned upon hearing your intonation.

“Yeah, um, I’m just not feeling all that good from the uh, fuck-” you glared at Jaehyun and placed a hand on his pelvis to soften his movements, “the traveling and activity.”

Yuta hummed in understanding and you felt bad for lying to him like this. “We can figure out another time to meet up and plan our date. You should go to sleep and get some rest, I don’t want you getting any worse.”

“Okay, I will. Thank you-” you pull the phone away from you as Jaehyun starts to speed up again and you cover your mouth with your free hand, letting out a muffled groan.

You brought the phone back to your ear to hear the tail end of Yuta’s “I love you” before telling him the same and quickly hanging up.

“You tell your groupmates ‘I love you?’” Jaehyun asked, not even bothering to slow down.

“Yes, and you don’t?” He rolled his eyes at you, only leaning down further, making his cock brush against your most sensitive areas. “Fuck, right there!”

Your walls flutter around his length as he begins mercilessly pounding into you, seeking his own release while you bring a hand down to rub at your clit, sending yourself into an orgasm. The spasming and clenching of your walls around his cock eventually pushes Jaehyun to his end as well though he quickly pulls out and cums onto your stomach instead, the warm strings of white coating your skin.

He lets out a string of groans and curses as he continues jerking himself until the last drops of cum are dripping from the tip of his length. He reaches over to the nightstand, grabbing a tissue and hastily cleaning off both of you before he collapses into the bed next to you.

“I’m gonna go wash up in the bathroom.” You inform him, sliding out of bed as he pulls the covers over his large frame.

“Mmm, alright, don’t take too long.” You could tell he was already getting drowsy from the way he drew out his words.

You picked up your clothes from the floor and took a quick shower in the bathroom but by the time you came back out, you knew Jaehyun was knocked out from the way you could hear his faint snores. Checking your phone on the nightstand, you saw two messages from Yuta and you knew you couldn’t keep this going any longer.

Yuta > y/n

11:43pm: text me how you’re feeling when you wake up

11:43pm: I can go run and get stuff for you at a convenience store before rehearsals

As much as you enjoyed the mindblowing sex that Jaehyun gave you, you knew that your heart laid with Yuta. You picked up the pen and notepad resting on the desk in the corner of the room, writing Jaehyun a note before quietly leaving the room.

Jaehyun, Thanks for everything but I can’t continue our relationship like this. I feel that we are best off as friends and I hope you can understand and respect my wishes. I’m sorry. -y/n

You made sure to text Yuta that you were feeling fine, still just a little bit tired but you weren’t sick, much to his relief. During stage rehearsals later that day, your group just so happened to pass by him and his members as they waited for their turn.

Yuta’s hand brushed against yours and you quickly apologized, matching the smile on his face as the two of you finally saw each other in person for the first time in months. You continued past the other members in an elated state, not even realizing the way Jaehyun had been staring at you.

“Did you see how Jaehyun was staring at you?” Ivet questioned, excitement written all over her face. “What if he has a crush on you, oh my gosh-”

“Yeah, did you guys ever talk to each other again after the show?” Liv added.

You shook your head, making a face of disgust. “Him? He’s not my type. We talked and I got his number but nothing happened.”

“You got his-” You covered Ivet’s mouth with your hand, noticing the way people around you were starting to look at you and your group as you all headed back to the waiting rooms.

You were glad that your members quickly dropped the topic once back in the waiting room, opting to play games on their phone or someone’s Switch instead while biding time as your managers came to pick you guys up. You decided to leave Yuta a message to make yourself feel better though you made sure that you were texting the right person this time.

y/n > Yuta

3:27pm: what’s your room number? Sorry I forgot to ask last night

3:27pm: I’ll be over once you guys are done

You didn’t expect him to respond for a while, especially since he just went on and you knew he had to stay later that day to record interviews and other content in Japanese. Time couldn’t go by any slower as you laid in bed and switched through apps, waiting for Yuta to be done with rehearsals. Your excitement couldn’t be hidden when you finally received his message later in the evening.

Yuta > y/n

8:32pm: just got back. 417 i left the door slightly open

y/n > Yuta

8:33pm: coming

8:33pm: that’s dangerous you know. Someone can just walk in

Yuta > y/n

8:34pm: then you better hurry ;)

It felt as if you were a little kid again, the way you could barely control your pace as you walked throughout the hotel, your body itching to sprint through the halls to get to your boyfriend sooner. When you quietly entered his room, you saw him standing by his bed with his back towards the wall, probably organizing his backpack out of boredom.

Rushing up behind him once you were close enough, you wrapped your arms around his waist and began tickling him, causing him to erupt in his infectious laughter as he squirmed around in your arms. He eventually freed himself, only to turn around and come right back into your arms. “My love, I’ve missed you so much. I can’t believe you’re actually in my arms right now.”

You allowed yourself to sink into his hold and inhale the scent of him that you missed having on all of the shirts you’ve stolen from him. “Can we just lie down together and go to sleep instead?”

“I wish, but you know we can’t,” he sighed, “but that doesn’t mean we can’t cuddle for now.” Yuta pushed you onto the bed, jumping on after you and rolling around with you in his arms. Once the two of you were comfortably tangled with the other, Yuta began pulling up places to go, showing you pictures and talking about things to do there.

“So at Harajuku there’s tons of clothing stores and really good food vendors too. There’s even some cat cafes we could go to and then-”

“Okay, I get it, we’re going to Harajuku, calm down.” You laughed, seeing how excited he became. True to your boyfriend’s nature, he quickly gave up trying to plan out a whole day of activities and choosing to simply make a list of places to go like Yoyogi Park, or the Yayoi Kusama Museum, and the previously agreed upon Harajuku.

After compiling the list, you were calculating how much time you had left before your roommate would question your whereabouts when Yuta suddenly turned to you. “So tomorrow, some of the members were thinking of going out to get lunch and I was thinking that maybe I could bring you along…” His voice trailed off as he looked at you for your opinion.

“You want to introduce me to your members?” Your eyes were wide at the thought of having to talk to Taeyong, who you absolutely looked up to or Johnny, who just scared you from his appearance alone. But most of all, Jaehyun.

Yuta nodded his head, his earrings making the faintest jingling sounds. “Not all of them will be there but I think we’ve been together long enough, right? It’s like meeting your in-laws kind of.” You weren’t too keen on the idea of seeing Jaehyun so soon, especially after what happened earlier today with him but you agreed anyway, not wanting to let Yuta down.

All throughout the morning, you were filled with anxiety as you thought about going to lunch with Yuta and his members but you followed through regardless because if Yuta was ready to make this next step in your relationship then you should take it with him. You met him in his room and went down to the parking garage with him, only reaching out for his hand once you were sure there was no one else around.

As you approached his members, Yuta called out to them. “Guys, this is y/n,” you suddenly felt nervous at the way all three men turned to look at you, “I’ve been dating her for about a year now and I felt that this would be the right time to finally introduce her.”

The end of Yuta’s sentence was cut off as Jaehyun suddenly began coughing and pulled out his phone, looking anywhere but at you though you didn’t have much time to dwell on it. “Hi y/n, I’m Taeyong, nice to meet you,“ you and Taeyong both laughed from his cheery attitude as you shook his hand, “I hope Yuta has been treating you well though I’m sure you wouldn’t have stayed with him for so long if he didn’t.”

“She actually idolizes you,” Yuta quickly interjected with a chuckle, “she probably wants to date you more than she wants to date me.”

You looked at him in disbelief though you were torn out of it by Haechan who commented, “we all do, she’s not special.”

“Hey, behave,” your boyfriend scolded, “that’s Haechan, the idiot,” Haechan was about to open his mouth to complain but was stopped by Yuta’s finger on his lips as he shushed him, “and over there is Jaehyun.” He looked up and gave a quick wave with an expressionless face before staring back at his phone.

Once you were all seated at the restaurant and waiting for the food, Taeyong began asking more about you and your relationship with Yuta who was currently sandwiched in between the two of you. “So how did the two of you actually meet?”

“She came up to me-”

“He told me that he-”

You both turned to each other with the same scowl adorning your faces. Placing a hand on his thigh you raised an eyebrow at him. He did the same to you before giving in. “Alright fine, I went up to her first because I thought she was cute,” Yuta explained, “remember that one episode on Music Bank or something when I said the girl in the green dress was cute? That was her.”

Taeyong and Haechan both seemed to have a moment of realization meanwhile Jaehyun was busy staring daggers into Yuta’s hand on your thigh. You could see him out of the corner of your eyes because he was seated right in front of you though you pretend as if you didn’t.

“What’s Yuta like as a boyfriend?” Haechan asked, a mischievous look on his face.

Yuta turned to you, his signature Chesire cat grin appearing. “I couldn’t ask for anyone better than him,” you state simply while maintaining eye contact with him, “he always does his best to take care of me even when you guys are really busy and he gives some of the best advice whenever I need help with something work-related. I genuinely feel that I want to be with him for as long as possible.”

“Yikes, get a room,” Haechan joked after seeing the way you smiled at his fellow member while talking about him.

“Jaehyun, are you okay?” Taeyong looked over at the said member with worry. You did as well and the look he gave you could only be described as one of pain. He nodded his head and flashed a quick smile at everyone else before his gaze lingered back on you and then back to his phone.

Only when Yuta was wrapped up in conversation with the other two did you nudge Jaehyun’s foot across from you. He did not react so you did it again and he looked up at you with the same emotionless stare. You didn’t even get the chance to do anything because at that moment, the food for your table arrived. Everyone lets out remarks at how good the food looks and you begin eating after warning your boyfriend not to inhale his food, much to Taeyong and Haechan’s amusement.

Later on, Taeyong brings up something about their performance, bringing Haechan and Jaehyun into the conversation but Yuta leans over and whispers, “I know about you and Jaehyun,” you momentarily freeze though you give him a look of confusion, “I’m not stupid, you know. I know you two were talking.”

You all but choked on the mouthful of noodles you were chewing but you brushed it off as Yuta telling you a funny joke. The others ask to hear it too and you were glad Yuta was a quick thinker and was able to make one up on the spot. You were surprised that Yuta claimed he knew about your relationship with Jaehyun but didn’t seem to be upset. It was honestly scaring you at this point.

Once the bill was paid and the group of you were in the car heading back to the hotel, Yuta starts up the conversation again as you were both in the back row of the van. “I wouldn’t have minded if you wanted to have fun with Jaehyun for a bit, you could have just told me.”

“Okay, how much do you actually know?”

“I know that you were in his room getting the sense fucked out of you when you should have been with me, if that’s what you’re asking about,” you felt yourself go into a state of panic though really, you were just confused about this whole thing, “you know, I wouldn’t mind including him in our relationship sexually. You just had to ask.”

Your eyes go wide at his words, unsure if this was all really happening or if it was just a dream. “Are you actually being serious right now?”

Yuta shrugged his shoulders and giggled, “I don’t know. Am I?”

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saphirered · 3 years

Note

HIIII! It's me again (Eldritch knight reader) sorry I kinda dipped out but I hope you are having a great day! I was wondering if you could do one last request for that mini series of requests, where Essek finally asks reader on a real date and it's going great (Knight could notice some figures following them *cough* M9+verin *cough*??) there's some flirting/teasing but sadly the date comes to an end and reader walks essek home, they say their goodbyes for the night but not before reader finally kisses Essek and whispers a goodnight!

Hi! Welcome back. Now of course this wouldn't be me if halfway through writing I realised this was turning way too long so it'll be a two-parter again to keep it readable. Hope you don't mind. Any way, here's the first part so I hope you enjoy! 😘

A long day of disasters with the Nein returning just in time to be thrust into more relentless hours of study with Essek wasn’t exactly how you envisioned to spend your day and luckily for you Essek is a merciful soul, when it comes to you that is. Seeing how battered and bruised you were, and mentally exhausted he refused to let you touch his precious tomes or even scribble a single note on paper. He had even gone as far as making said smaller items disappear into the nothingness. Damn wrist pocket spell. Essek was determined. You needed rest. He’d make sure you got it.

So instead of hours upon hours spent at Essek’s home he opted for staying with you retreating to the upstairs of the Xhorhaus and finding the both of you a comfy spot to spend your time in a more relaxed environment. Essek sits, back against the tree while you lay sprawled across the floor next to his outstretched legs eyes closed as the wizard reads to you. He may not have allowed you to read for yourself as to not overwork yourself but the compromise you convinced him to was agreeable. More than agreeable if you’re honest.

It’s no secret you like spending time together as you do so a lot. You may be a little more affectionate with each other than say for example with Caleb or Jester. It doesn’t go unnoticed Essek likes you, if anything the man’s made it pretty clear and vice versa. Neither of you have just ever acted on it. With everything going on in your lives, how could you? You’re a ragtag adventurer with no allegiance to kingdom or country. He’s the bloody spymaster of the Dynasty. It’s not exactly a conventional prospect of a future, nor is it likely to succeed with the kind of lives you live. Could you really afford that kind of struggle? Maybe, if you were willing to take the risk but lately things have been hectic and this moment of relaxation beneath the tree at the top of this tower is the first moment of peace either of you have known in a long time.

You swear, you’re paying attention. You might still have to reread the whole book again as you’re just entranced by the sound of Essek’s voice. The man could make anything sound interesting. Give him those pages from that Iva lady back at the Chastity’s Nook in Zadash and Essek could make even that sound like a master piece. Though in hindsight, maybe best not as you think he might not be able to get past the first few sentences himself. The cringe.

“Are you still listening?” Essek’s reading voice breaks in favour of the question as he watches you drift off with a smile on your face. He’s almost afraid to ask the question but is unsure if that’s because you’ve grown tired or the subject bores you too much.

“Hm?” You perk up turning your head to the side and looking at the wizard. The exhaustion is written over your face but doesn’t diminish the content smile you present.

“Perhaps that is enough for the day?” Essek suggests closing the book and sits up a little straighter. He places the book by his side as you sit up and go to reach for it. Essek’s quicker and places his hand firmly on top of it and prevents you from taking it. He’s very sure you’d have no trouble retrieving the book if you really wanted to and maybe he’d like you to try, just a little, but you’re tired and need rest. Not fill your mind with pages of knowledge attempting to cram in the words. You’re a good study but even the best of studies cannot combat the banes of exhaustion.

“It is getting late anyway.” Essek says as you roll back and find yourself, head leaning against his thigh, looking up at the drow with a pout as he insinuates he’ll have to leave soon. You catch him off guard but he’s not opposed to the sense of affection and comfort you radiate. Physical affection is rare between the two of you especially since he’s very new to it in such contexts. He’s still getting used to it and he’d be lying if he said it’s unwelcome.

“If you say so.” You stay like this for a few more minutes before the ruckus downstairs pulls you out of your moment and you’re reminded Essek needs to head back to his own home. He still has business to attend to, business he’s been procrastinating in favour of spending more time with you. You sit back up, swing your legs beneath yourself and rise to your feet offering Essek a hand to help him to his feet.

“Essek, do you have a moment.” Caleb calls over as he enters the living space. The drow looks at you as if to ask if you know what this might be about or more like your permission to allow himself to be whisked away by the wizard interrupting your goodbye. You shrug.

“I should probably try and prevent this kitchen fire waiting to happen. I take it Cad’s still out getting groceries?” Caleb nods and you sigh shudder preparing for the oncoming disaster rushing into the kitchen like a valiant hero, albeit a little more domestic than your usual adventures, valiant no less.

A conversation between two wizards in one room and a homemade fluffernutter dismantled in another you reunite with Essek. There he is floating in all his glory, cloak back around his shoulders you see him off. Essek seems a little… nervous? Is that the right word? So you give Caleb a look but he acts all innocent. You know better than to trust that. Nevermind, you’ll have an easier time getting it out of Essek than Caleb if you need to. Caleb sends the others off to their own business persuading them to clean up before Caduceus returns and finds his precious kitchen in disarray or any other state he didn’t leave it in before he left. The firbolg is quite protective of his pride and joy. You lead Essek over to the hall but interpose yourself between him and the door crossing your arms and tapping your foot expectedly.

“So is this where you tell me what you and Caleb talked about or am I going to have to work for it?” The look you give Essek makes him want to spill all the beans right then right there but he wants to do this the right way and not be a blabbering incoherent mess. He has to do this the right way. You deserve that much; if not for the way he feels then simply for every effort you’d put in your actions to do with him.

“It’s to do with you.” Oh? Now you’re curious. “I asked Caleb for some advise.” What in the worlds would he need to go to Caleb for to get advise on to do with you? Essek’s not one to admit lacking either skill or knowledge when it’s about people and even less so to confide in another in such a way because by all means, his little side bar with with the redhead was anything but an interrogation to get information about character, motives and possible leverage like he would have navigated a political encounter.

“And what, pray tell could Caleb be lecturing you on?” You grin with he gentle stroke at Essek’s ego. If you know one thing, sweet-talking will get you everywhere with this man. Not that you’d minded. Not that you were lying. You’d never lie about such things. But you’re also not against using your opinions to gently persuade the drow in revealing what he’s hiding.

“Matters of heart. It seems I am at a disadvantage when expressing them to the subject of my affections.” Essek admits and you watch the skin of his cheeks to become a darker shade of purple. Damn, this is not going the way he envisioned it. Like a rock being tossed into the elemental plane of water, sinking into that eternal ocean.

“Oh really, now? It seems to me you’re doing perfectly fine.” Essek laughs awkwardly and looks to the floor to gather his bearings but when he feels your hand rise to his cheek and lift his gaze to look you in the eye, when you step in a little closer to him. He knows you’re teasing, or at least partially teasing. He also knows best to rip the bandaid off quickly and hope you’ll be merciful in your answer.

“I was wondering if you’d join me on an outing, tomorrow if it suits you?” Essek feels the words leave his lips. He doesn’t blurt them out like some lovesick fool and is thankful for that at least.

“Of course, will we be going to the library again? Or another shopping trip? Need me to carry more of those heavy papers again? Please can we do this time without any assassins sent to kill you? I think we could both do with a break for once.” You laugh and it becomes quite clear to Essek his phrasing might have been a little off so he’ll have to correct himself. Great. Just what he needs. Make this more awkward and difficult for himself than it already is. Maybe he would have been better off blurting out the words like a lovesick fool.

“What I had in mind would be more like a planned outing, a break from our usual lives and away from the responsibilities we both carry.” Essek clarifies and the copper drops for you.

“Essek, are you asking me to go on a date with you?” Yes. Yes. For the love of the gods, the Luxon and all that is sacred thank you for speaking the words correctly instead of leaving him to go in circles until he can’t anymore and dies from embarrassment. Why does he always turn into a mess when it comes to you? Because he likes you, a lot, maybe even more than just like. Definitely more than just that.

“That is exactly what I have been attempting and failing to convey, yes.” He admits ashamed. Your laugh makes for a good consolation though, no matter your answer. Up until now the possibility of your answer whichever outcome, had never been a bother to him as he never really gave asking you a thought, for his own sake or this may just have gone much worse with his tendency to overthink. In suspense he awaits. Not even the powers of dunamis at his fingertips could make the passage of time before your answer feel like less when in reality you barely missed a beat.

“Of course. I’d love nothing more.” You caress his cheek. Your smile grows from amusement to joy and Essek couldn’t be happier. He felt himself slipping into a smile of his own. Essek let himself go in that joy and relief you accepted rather than the stress of the actual date tomorrow. He’ll worry about that one later.

#critical role x reader #critrole x reader #mighty nein x reader #essek thelyss x reader #essek x reader #critical role #mighty nein

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caffeinatedseri · 3 years

Text

The Significance of Sunsets

We’re introduced to the significance of twilight during the Cannibalism Arc via the Tripartite Tactic.

The essence of the Tripartite Tactic supports 3 core themes of BSD: moral ambiguity, the cyclical nature of life, and the beauty of humanity.

First, the Tripartite Tactic establishes the moral balance of the BSD universe through the government, PM, and ADA’s interactions with one another to ensure the balance of Yokohama.

Day and night are binary opposites, similar to how the government and mafia operate on opposite sides. That would imply that the government and mafia are always at war with one another, working to bring the other down, but the Tripartite Tactic suggests otherwise.

Both the government and mafia’s survival are necessary to secure the balance of the city, just like how day and night, good and evil have to coexist in a state of balance.

However, there is a middle ground that bridges these opposing concepts together: twilight — as represented with the agency.

As the evening acts the neutral point from day to night, the agency acts as a morally neutral organization between the government and mafia. They don’t necessarily abide by the laws and rules of “justice,” but they still work to establish a semblance of “good” in this world.

We’ve seen the government act in suspicious ways, we’ve seen the mafia act in good natured ways, and we’ve seen the agency do both of the sort. Even though the government and mafia are supposed to represent “good” and “evil”, the fact that they break these molds serves to once again prove the moral ambiguity within the BSD universe.

Twilight also symbolizes another important idea — the cyclical nature of life. As the passing period between day and night, it represents the end of a day, which will always lead to the start of a new day.

This cyclical nature lends itself to a feeling of hope that drives the journey of redemption — the hope that the night will pass and a new day will begin encourages our characters to persevere and hope for something better.

Cycles also show themselves through character interactions throughout the generations.

Mori abused Dazai → Dazai abused Akutagawa → Akutagawa abused Kyouka, In this case, the cycle of abuse is born (although it fortunately stops at Kyouka).

In parallel, Oda helped Dazai → Dazai helped Atsushi → Atsushi helps Kyouka, For this, the cycle of redemption is born.

As twilight is a time for sunsets, sunsets are an inevitable motif for these themes. The arrangement of colors in the sky, characteristic of a sunset, tends to evoke feelings of awe or admiration for the beauty of such sunset. The beauty of a sunset symbolizes an appreciation for the beauty of humanity, aligning with the theme of accepting human nature as is. (think Dazai)

Keeping in mind these 3 aspects: moral ambiguity, the cyclical nature of life, and the beauty of humanity, the significance of every scene with a sunset becomes more prominent.

Sunsets in BSD always appear at important points of the narrative, with my favorite being:

This scene’s significance is primarily Dazai’s transition out of the mafia as represented through the light shining through the window — as if light is being shined on the darkness that had surrounded his life.

This scene happens to be one of my favorites because it touches upon all three themes that the twilight-esque light represents.

Moral ambiguity: Oda knows that Dazai doesn’t care about justice or evil, or defining aspects of morality, so Oda argues Dazai should work for justice. Oda doesn’t try to argue that justice is morally correct, but he simply says it is “better” in an extremely vague way.

The idea of Dazai joining the side of justice with no strong moral conviction opens up the concept of moral ambiguity. Is it important for him to have a moral code if he wants to find the purpose of his life? Can he help others if he doesn’t believe it’s the “right” thing to do? Does it matter?

Most importantly, does saving others whilst not believing in the standards of morality place you within the boundaries of justice or evil? Or are there no such defined boundaries?

Cyclical nature: Oda pushes for Dazai to save people, instead of killing people, mirroring the actions of Natsume-sensei who helped Oda come to that same resolve. This starts the cycle of Dazai helping Atsushi, Atsushi helping Kyouka, and hopefully Atsushi getting to help Akutagawa as well.

This scene also reflects the idea of the “end of the night”, or the start of a new day as Dazai abandons the PM, and starts anew in the Agency.

Beauty of humanity: PM Dazai was arguably the most “inhumane” version of Dazai that we’ve seen, due to his heavily logic driven intellect and distrusting tendencies.

However, in this interaction with Oda, we finally see his humanity shine through. Oda gives no reasonable, straight-forward explanation as to why Dazai should leave the mafia, but Dazai follows his advice regardless because of their trust.

The ability to trust and love, an innate part of human nature, can be seen as foolish from the eyes of the logic-driven, but ultimately that’s what makes being human beautiful.

I admit the last scene may have been a little vague with whether the setting was actually a sunset, but this one is more obvious!

This takes place after SSKK’s fight with Francis, and they regroup with Dazai, Fukuzawa, and Kyouka.

Cyclical nature: As the finale of the Guild Arc, the sunset represents the end of a day and the start of another as they close this chapter of their lives. It also parallels Dazai’s “redemption” scene, as Kyouka finds her redemption in sacrificing herself for others and becoming part of the agency.

Just as Oda was able to help Dazai in the previous scene, Dazai is the one who tells Kyouka exactly what she needed to hear in order for her to survive and find a home in the agency.

Beauty of humanity: Being human means to be compassionate, and I’d argue that Kyouka was uncompassionate in the past, just because no one had shown her what compassion was like. However, Kyouka grows from that — with the help of Atsushi and Dazai showing her empathy and kindness, she’s able to reciprocate that feeling and be willing to give up her life for the sake of others.

Dazai also praises Akutagawa for a short moment in this scene, which is also an act of compassion from Dazai although Akutagawa deserves more than that.

This scene follows the party at the end of the Cannibalism Arc, as Dazai and Atsushi have a nice heart-to-heart.

Dazai’s toast here is technically an anime-only moment, but obviously all of the sunsets are anime-only. Regardless, I’ll be discussing his entire talk with Atsushi here, along with the toast.

Moral ambiguity: Akutagawa’s promise to not kill anyone for 6 months mirrors that of Oda — a mafia member who doesn’t kill. By doing so, he directly challenges the morality involved with being a mafia member (what would be “bad”) and breaks away from the black and white labels of “good” and “evil.”

If we followed the code of justice, presumably the morally “right” way, then it would dictate that Akutagawa would need to be punished for the crimes he committed. However, Atsushi’s decision to form that promise with Akutagawa gives him an opportunity to grow and redeem himself, even if Akutagawa fits with the “evil” label.

Akutagawa and Atsushi are obviously foils — they’re different in almost every way, which you could use to define Atsushi as the hero and Akutagawa as the villain, but it’s undeniable that they also share many similarities. As the line between “good” and “evil” blurs, moral ambiguity is developed.

Cyclical nature: Once again, this scene closes out the Cannibalism Arc, with the sunset symbolizing both the end and beginning.

Atsushi’s promise with Akutagawa parallels that of Oda’s dying wish to Dazai; they’re both founded on the basis of trust, and they push towards a brighter future for Akutagawa and Dazai respectively. Thus, the cycle of redemption repeats itself once more.

Dazai’s “To the stray dogs” statement also parallels his toast with the Buraiha trio (Dazai, Ango, Oda). It could be just a callback to Oda, but it also expresses Dazai passing on the toast to Atsushi, from one stray dog to another. Nevertheless, this still represents a cycle of actions in which the previous generation affects the present.

Beauty of humanity: Dazai toasting to Atsushi with the phrase “stray dogs” offers a sense of compassion and hope. Dazai and Atsushi have undoubtedly grown closer to one another throughout the entire series up to this point, so it makes perfect sense that Dazai shows that he cares by sharing a piece of his past with Atsushi.

Toasting directly to the stray dogs implies a celebration of sorts for these dogs, who are stray but ultimately not alone. The toast is indicative of a hope for a better future whilst also acknowledging how one can feel lost in life (and how that’s okay).

Atsushi’s promise with Akutagawa also serves as an attempt to teach Akutagawa the beauty of humanity, since Atsushi believes that Akutagawa doesn’t see the value of life (which is preventing him from getting Dazai’s approval). I would argue that it should be the other way around, but Atsushi has good intentions here.

After Atsushi discovers the death of the Headmaster of his orphanage, Dazai gives some comforting advice.

Moral ambiguity: Atsushi struggles with his conflicted feelings towards the Headmaster’s death, which is perfectly understandable.

The Headmaster can’t be defined as completely good or completely bad, because he did impact Atsushi’s life in a way that led him to where he is today (once again, no definitive black or white answer as to whether that’s good or not).

Atsushi struggles with the thought that he has to pick whether to feel glad or upset, in order to fit within the neat labels of black and white, happy and sad. In response, Dazai (the definition of a morally ambiguous man) simply says:

Although Dazai says “There’s no one who can fully grasp the deepest feelings of another person,” in the anime, I think the meaning of that is better stated in the manga. Dazai reasons that he can be both glad or upset, his feelings can be mixed, and there is no clear cut answer for how to feel (as Dazai only gives a general piece of advice).

Cyclical nature: Dazai’s statement, “when someone’s father dies, they tend to cry”, could honestly be interpreted in a multitude of ways.

Dazai’s reference to a father figure suggests that this “father” is simply a person who impacted their life greatly and made them who they are today. (since both of their fathers are unknown).

Following this definition, Oda is the father figure to Dazai in the same way that the Headmaster was to Atsushi. Although their methods of “helping” Dazai and Atsushi differ very drastically, the same cycle of this “father” figure impacting the life of their metaphorical son repeats.

Oda giving advice to Dazai, and Dazai giving advice to Atsushi is also another cycle — the cycle of reaching a hand out to someone in need. (which is the more sensical of these two conclusions)

Beauty of humanity: Dazai’s ability to be compassionate truly shines in this scene and shows just how much he’s grown from his time in the PM.

In contrary to PM Dazai’s unfeeling self, Dazai is able to empathize with Atsushi on a personal basis; just as the Headmaster was a integral part of Atsushi’s past, Oda was the same for Dazai.

Dazai’s growing ability to understand others demonstrates his willingness to grow more accustomed to human nature, and love it for what it is.

Atsushi’s confusion in dictating what he should feel also speaks on the nature of humanity; his feelings don’t have to make sense for him to feel them. In fact, the more illogical his emotions are, the more human he is.

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd meta #bsd analysis #bsd dazai #bsd atsushi #bsd kyouka #just me gushing over how much i love sunsets #there are many more sunset scenes that i didnt cover hmmm

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miraculouscontent · 3 years

Text

Didn’t Need Burrow (July 20th-August 2nd)

Anonymous asked:

Didn't Need Burrow: Tikki's stance on the prospect of The Reveal is abruptly reversed and/or retconned so that she's completely in favor of Marinette telling Chat Noir her secret identity. Bonus if she doesn't tell her this until AFTER some Drama Bomb has dropped, with Mari getting lectured for not reading her damned mind/'taking initiative'/figuring out before now that everything is always her fault, always and forever, because she's not P-E-R-F-E-C-T.

omg

I’m reminded of “Lady Wifi” with Tikki asking Marinette if she’s sure about not telling Chat her identity, and also “Sentibubbler” where Tikki was perfectly fine with Alya knowing.

Like?????

Anonymous asked:

Didn't Need Burrow: Something that comes as a devastating blow for Marinette mildly inconveniences Adrien. Naturally, HIS reaction to whatever it is gets played in all seriousness while HERS is glossed over/mined for humor/she's shamed for the grievous sin of having an EMOTIONAL REACTION instead of being Tikki's perfect little flawless automation.

Well, obviously his issues are worse! Look how sad he is!!

Look how SAD!!

Anonymous asked:

Didn't Need Burrow: Tikki lectures Marinette for putting Too Much Responsibility on Chat Noir's shoulders. This is possibly passed off as how she should KNOW that PLAGG is Unreliable, as opposed to *Chat Noir* being Unreliable. Bonus: this is coupled with how she should TRUST Chat Noir more... just not, you know, with actual RESPONSIBILITIES or anything.

I’m like, laughing but also seething, because just the double standard of “YOU SHOULD TRUST HIM... but don’t put more on his shoulders, he’s going through so much!!”

“Bonus” if it’s a “Marinette, it’s all your fault!! You don’t know what Chat goes through!!!” despite how she literally can’t.

emikogale asked:

I don't need a burrow to know that the season 4 finale is probably going to have some forced drama and cheap shock value.

is it time to pull Reverse Love Square

is it

Anonymous asked:

Didn't Need Burrow: It's explicitly stated that Plagg is meant to be 'teaching Adrien' how to be more selfish (or 'independent'), because cats are stereotypically selfish/independent creatures, and Adrien obviously NEEDS to know that it's okay for HIM to be selfish.

Deep breaths, Clarity.

Deep breaths.

Anonymous asked:

Didn't Need Burrow: Marinette's trauma from Chat Blanc will be treated as a *good thing*, as she is told that she SHOULD feel guilty and that this should motivate her to be more honest with her partner, despite all evidence to the contrary. If she took 'the wrong lesson' from this, then it's her own fault, clearly!

What’s the phrase? “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”?

Naturally though, Adrien will be exempt from this and will be told that he deserves better and shouldn’t take this.

Anonymous asked:

Don't need to burrow: Luka/Kagami will never get a magical charm or have a scene where they break their akumazations. If we do get that scene, for Luka he will most likely break it off for his family or to another love interest like Zoé. (I can see the show frame it as a lesson to Marinette like "You see Marinette, Luka can break it off if you told him the truth in the first place. But no, he prefers Zoé since she's more honest than you". For Kagami, it'll be mostly be off screen and ignored.

Zoeka: *exists*

all of us: oh god

Anonymous asked:

Didn't Need Burrow: Once Alya inevitably screws up in a way that Tikki can't gloss over, Tikki will berate Marinette for going against THE RULES and make everything out to be All Her Fault, while acting as though she NEVER supported the idea of Alya knowing.

It’s times like these where I wish we could double up on Didn’t Need Burrows, but then we’d have like, a card’s worth of doubling up, lol.

Anonymous asked:

Didn't Need Burrow: Adrien/Chat Noir actively sabotages one of Ladybug/Rena/the other heroes' plans in order to prove that 'they still need him'. Marinette/Ladybug takes all the blame for the fallout.

Of course she does.

Marinette, you need to TAKE CHARGE!!

Anonymous asked:

Don't Need a Burrow: Chat Blanc Sentimonster

It won’t happen, but I just got an awful thought of Chat Blanc and Sentibug returning at the same time.

Anonymous asked:

Don't Need a Burrow: We will have even more Akumatized Villain/Sentimonster pairs which are rehash of Reflekta/Reflekdoll situation.

“Bonus” if the sentimonster barely matches the akuma’s original role. Like Reflekdoll VS Guiltrip.

Anonymous asked:

Didn't Need Burrow: Adrien/Chat Noir will start secretly destroying the Anti-Akuma Charms so that people can keep getting victimized, providing more chances for him to see Ladybug. Marinette will blame herself, thinking she made them improperly/incorrectly somehow.

And even once it comes out, Marinette will forgive him and insists that it’s her fault for not “considering his feelings” and how she “should’ve made the charms stronger.”

Anonymous asked:

Theory that could be DNB I guess: The REAL Adrien is in a coma/dead and OUR Adrien is a senti that his mother created to be the “perfect” replacement goldfish son. Real Adrien is in some treatment facility in Tibet (if alive) and Gabriel and Emilie found their miraculous shortly thereafter.

FDKJGKFDGf

Okay, this ask wins for “Didn’t Need Burrow that made me laugh most.”

“Perfect replacement goldfish son,” oh my gosh, it’s beautiful.

Anonymous asked:

DNB: When Maribug gets akumatised, Renalya and Adrichat have the "knights in shining armor" to save the "damsel in distress". Maribug is eventually blamed for getting akumatised in the first place while Renalya and Adrichat get off scot-free :)

Real talk, one of the only akuma I can think of who were “blamed” for the akumatizations was Markov (since Max debated turning him back on even though he himself has gotten akumatized before). Does that put Marinette on the same level as a robot, expected to follow orders to a tee?

Anonymous asked:

DNB: Marinette gets Yet More Lessons about how she shouldn't be selfish and must always put others ahead of herself, no matter how much she suffers as a result. Adrien, meanwhile, is 'taught' to put himself first. Bonus: one episode combines the lessons, AND we're shown how Adrien already KNOWS how to be selfish and is OPENLY SO as Chat Noir, yet his misbehavior is presented as Good while Maribug is punished for being imperfect, as always.

Thanks, I hate it, take it away.

Anonymous asked:

DNB: In a Shocking Twist on the Senti!Adrien theory, Gabriel MAKES a Senti!Adrien to replace his own son. The REAL Adrien winds up locked up and/or running away, and much Angstrese is had. Bonus if this leads to Reversed LSBS: Senti!Adrien shows polite interest in Marinette because Gabriel still wants to akumatize her, damnit, while Ladybug notices that Chat Noir seems stressed and reaches out to him, only to be rebuked because he's still a selfish little creep who hates her having secrets.

The fact that Gabriel has never taken advantage of Marinette’s crush despite knowing that she’s crushing on Adrien (”Chat Blanc” doesn’t count) is weird to me. If he was after her in “Ladybug” then why not take advantage of it?

...Wait, is SentiAdrien going to cause reverse love square because “Adrien would never make Marinette fall out of love for him because he’s perfect so it has to be a misunderstanding”?

oh no

Anonymous asked:

DNB: Shadowmoth makes a Senti!Adrien for some stupid reason or another. Like Sentibug before him, Marinette tries to save him upon realizing the truth, and is hit hard by the inevitable loss. Fandumb naturally SLAUGHTERS her for it, insisting that she would have gladly replaced the REAL Adrien with the fake, much like how Adrien/Chat Noir preferred Sentibug to Ladybug. Bonus if Alya/Tikki/others reinforce that mentality by accusing Marinette of the same thing themselves.

I don’t know which of these two SentiAdriens DNBs are worse.

Anonymous asked:

DNB: The difficulty of using multiple Miraculi at once is retconned so that the REAL issue is how well the kwami get along. Marinette learns this the hard way when Tikki gets into a jealous snit-fit with one of the other kwami, and they refuse to work with each other in a joint transformation. Naturally, it falls upon Marinette to help them reconcile, as she's blamed for whatever sparked off the argument in the first place. Because of course she is.

*sigh*

Anonymous asked:

DNB: Marinette has a full-fledged breakdown over all her responsibilities piling up on top of the guilt complex she's naturally developed from being blamed for everything that goes wrong. At best, she gets a pithy line or two about others 'completely supporting' and 'believing' in her before she's forced to get back up, still staggering under the weight; at worst, she's guilt-tripped for having the breakdown, because HOW DARE she be HUMAN, am I right?!

Just the idea of it being said already that teens aren’t meant to be guardian/hold miraculouses and then Marinette being chided for “not doing a good job” is just--

ugh.

Anonymous asked:

DNB: Adrien outright admits that he hates Ladybug having other allies, complaining that things were so much better when it was just him and 'his lady' against the world, without even the Guardian's support. His whining is treated as sympathetic, even if he outright states that he wishes she was completely dependent upon him and didn't have anyone else to turn to.

tbh this is the only reason we don’t have permanent heroes; because Chat wouldn’t have his private time with Ladybug to flirt.

I can’t be convinced otherwise.

Anonymous asked:

DNB: Chat Noir's jealousy of Rena spurs an outburst from him that forcibly reminds Ladybug of Chat Blanc. The trauma response this triggers is naturally used *against* her, played as Marinette's Latest Mistake. Since her trauma is CLEARLY her own fault, and she's GOT to learn how to cOnTrOl HeR eMoTiOnS while Adrien can throw Cataclysmic hissy fits to his heart's content.

Honestly, even if they didn’t do this specifically, I could also see Marinette being blamed for “being afraid of Chat Noir/Blanc” when she “doesn’t even know what happened.”

Basically, her “““blaming”““ Chat or “““reacting to him”““ for something he “““didn’t even do.”““

Anonymous asked:

DNB: 'Curiosity killed the cat, but satisfaction brought them back.' Much like the old nursery rhyme, Adrien's insistence that he DESERVES to know everything he wants to stick his nose into 'kills' any pretense of Chat Noir being heroic as he turns on/abandons Team Miraculous. Marinette/Ladybug is forced to cater to his whims in order to 'satisfy' him enough that he comes back.

Seems fair. :|

Anonymous asked:

DNB: Adrien/Chat Noir inflicts physical damage on somebody/something that is NOT magically wiped away/restored by his partner's Cure. This inconsistency exists purely to blame Ladybug for the consequences of HIS actions. Possibly with a side of Angstrien (provided they have him actually act like he *gives a damn* about what he's done).

I think that’s a pretty common trope in fics too; Ladybug being worried that Miraculous Ladybug won’t bring something back.

So yet another thing taken from the fandom.

Anonymous asked:

DNB: When Marinette finds out about Alya betraying her faith in her yet again, Alya bleats that she didn't explicitly SAY that she couldn't tell Nino, only that she trusted her, which she took to mean that she 'trusts her judgment'. In other words, Alya blames her *deliberately ignoring Marinette's wishes* on her 'bestie'. Bonus if Marinette subsequently TRIES spelling things out more only for Alya to complain about her being too 'pushy'/'controlling'/not leaving her that wiggle room.

“Girl, I told you to trust me, because I know that there won’t be any consequences to this!”

Anonymous asked:

DNB: Alya discovers Adrien's secret identity. Rather than telling/warning Marinette, however, she either spills the beans to him or schemes to get them together/force a reveal, believing that this will 'magically solve everything'. The show acts as though she's entirely justified in jerking Marinette around, pretending it's *hilarious* for her to add to her BFF's misery with her plotting behind her back.

Obviously this is all for Marinette’s sake so it’s fine.

Anonymous asked:

Didn't Need Burrow: Adrien will FINALLY learn/figure out that Marinette made his scarf... and be heartbroken that SHE lied to him about it.

Marinette, how could you possibly let Adrien believe that his father did something nice for him to make him happy! You let him live a lie!!

Anonymous asked:

Don't Need a Burrow: Mister Rat Sentimonster

I will only accept this if Xavier Ramier saves the day somehow.

Anonymous asked:

DNB: Chat Noir will confront Ladybug directly about 'replacing him with Rena', whining about how HE'S her partner, not HER. No matter how much she tries reassuring him/strokes his ego to calm him down, Adrien remains pissy about it. Bonus if this blow-up happens during an akuma attack/other crisis, and Marinette is presented as unreasonable for wanting to focus on the bigger problem at hand. Screw the civilians, what about Chat's pOoR fEeLiNgS~?

What about THE DYNAMIC, Marinette?????

Anonymous asked:

Didn't Need Burrow: Gabriel's grousing about how Ladybug 'never makes mistakes' foreshadows an inevitable moment where, after gaining a major advantage thanks to somebody else's screw-up, he gloats that Ladybug has finally made a major tactical error.

...They would.

They absolutely would.

Anonymous asked:

DNB: Gabriel will exploit his son's gross sense of entitlement towards 'his lady' by convincing Adrien that Ladybug has neglected him more than HE has, what with the whole 'wanting to have a say in her own love life/rejected his unwanted advances/begging him to take things seriously rather than treating superheroics as a game'. Adrien laps this tripe up like cream to soothe his ever so precious ego.

Which makes Shadow Moth out to be a decent manipulator but continues to make the love square look bad.

Anonymous asked:

Didn't Need Burrow: Adrien will be responsible for exposing the fact that Alya still has the Fox Miraculous to Gabriel. This could be by telling him directly during a face-heel turn, or simply because he's careless with that information (such as confronting Ladybug about Rena during an akuma attack/while Hawk/Shadowmoth is in a position to overhear).

I presume Ladybug is to blame for this for ever giving Alya and Nino a miraculous at the same time (when her hand was forced) in the first place.

Anonymous asked:

DNB: Chat Noir straight-up *assaults* Alya out of jealousy over Ladybug trusting her more/'replacing him' with Rena. This may involve Cataclysm, and she may or *may not* be transformed at the time. Bonus if this happens *BEFORE* or *WITHOUT* him switching sides to join Hawk/Shadowmoth, and is purely about him *getting her out of the way*, possibly with the paper-thin excuse of wanting to 'prove himself' without her being around to 'screw him up' or 'steal his glory'.

I’d like to say that this isn’t likely, but he’s already been driven to property destruction soooooo--

Anonymous asked:

DNB: After investing so much time and effort into building Alya up as this incredible individual who absolutely deserves Marinette's trust despite doing nothing to earn it or her preternatural skill with Guardian-related tasks, she will abruptly lose all competence in order to 'prove' that Adrien is naturally better than her and that HE is Ladybug's 'only TRUE partner'.

Or Alya telling Nino comes out and in comes Chat with “I would never keep things from you, m’lady!!!”

Meanwhile, fandom having “Chat Blanc” flashbacks.

Anonymous asked:

DNB: The series ends with Adrien selling the in-universe version of Astruc the rights to tell their story, with the clear implication that everything we just watched is the end result. Meaning that Marinette gets to be humiliated by her adventures being 'recreated' in precisely the form we've seen, every episode cheerfully depicting her as a constant screw-up who got blamed for EVERYTHING that went wrong. Because why should she get to have any kind of positive self-image, right? GIRL POWER!

Oh my gosh, they would.

Anonymous asked:

Didn't need burrow: In Crocodues, Luka will fully be over Marinette and act like a friend while Marinette might still have feelings and is super awkward around him, highlighting how Marinette (or girls in general) has poor control over her emotions unlike Luka (er boys in gerenal).

Still waiting for reverse love square where Marinette is over Adrien but Luka is no longer an option so guess she has to go for Chat.

...Does that make Chat a rebound?

Anonymous asked:

Didn't Need Burrow: One or more of the kwami outright admit that yeah, no, they simply don't respect Marinette at all. Due to her youth, inexperience, lack of training, or maybe just because they can get away with treating her like shit and acting like a spoiled brat. Naturally, this is treated as entirely HER fault. Bonus if she TRIES to lay down the law with them and is promptly villainized for it. Maybe even compared to Hawk/Shadowmoth.

Completely understandable, of course. They’re just so used to people who are older and wiser and professional--

Anonymous asked:

Don't Need a Burrow: Mass of episodes fleshing out Luka, since Lukanette is out of picture now. (Bonus points if Anti Lukanette people will make posts saying that fleshing out Luka would be impossible without breaking Lukanette first)

“Wishmaker” will probably do this. I can’t see them giving Luka anymore screentime than the three episodes he should be “grateful” for. (”Truth,” “Crocoduel,” and “Wishmaker”)

Anonymous asked:

Don't Need to Burrow (Wishmaker)

The episode will be a mixture of Hearthunter and Frozer. There will be a Luka/Mari/Adri moments throughout the episode. And as the episode ends, Marinette will look at Adrien and Luka will be sad and say you should go to him to which she does. Thus making...the Lukanette ship...sighs...dead.

I’m blown away by this idea of the person who is arguably most “deserving” of a warm and loving relationship not getting one (or getting a “second choice” with Zoe for example) while characters who clearly aren’t ready to be in a relationship get all the attention.

Anyone wanna take a guess on which “nice guy” writer lost a girlfriend to an actually nice guy and is still salty about it to this day?

Anonymous asked:

Don't need to Burrow Wishmaker

Luka will play a song on his violin that represents the love square, it will be be so beautiful that Mari and Adrien will be in awe together when in reality its just the Spongebob sad violin music.

I can also see violin scratching for it as well.

I choked on my drink.

Anonymous asked:

Don't need to Burrow (Wishmaker)

This episode will either be the Lukanette vs Adrienette feud or it will show us all these crazy shipping scenarios from LS to Lukanette to LukaAdri. It will give the fans what they wanted but ended the ships in a nightmare.

Psst....you can tell by the icecream symbolism

Ugh, I’m dreading the idea of it being an episode about these repeated scenarios and then having to go back or whatever. Viperion’s there so maybe him witnessing them and then having to go back.

tc-leo asked:

Don't need to Burrow

Luka will basically lead Adrien and Marinette down the Love Square endgame path through his violin playing.

This would be the second time they forced Luka to play for the love square.

I swear to several lords--

tc-leo asked:

Don't Need to Burrow to know that in Wishmaker, the scene of Adrien in the middle while a closeup of Luka and Mari holding hands represents the end of Lukanette.

“““plot twist,”““ the writers say, while we sip our tea going, “you really think you can still bait us?”

Anonymous asked:

Didn't need burrow: Wishmaker will be the Heart Hunter of Lukanette. As in Luka and Marinette have Adrien third wheel them and it's actually cute and stuff. Optimistic I know but that's what it looked like in the trailer.

Your optimism is adorable and I appreciate it even if I’ve been burned too many times to be lured in by it.

Anonymous asked:

DNB: Juleka reveals a deep-rooted resentment towards Marinette for 'breaking her brother's heart'. This bottled-up anger fuels a call out where she rants about how she never deserved Luka, tossing out accusations that Mari can only weakly deny, since Everything Is Always Her Fault and She Deserves To Suffer. Juleka going off is presented as a positive thing since she's sharing her true feelings; meanwhile, Marinette has to bottle HERS up even more and absorb the abuse, apologizing to her/Luka.

show: *continuously pressures and pushes Marinette towards Adrien*

also show: *blames Marinette for being into Adrien*

Anonymous asked:

DNB: That teaser picture Gloob released that had Marinette looking at Luka wasn’t actually a Lukanette scene! It was actually taken right after Luka told Marinette about how he’s dating Zoe and is happy now. Marinette is smiling to show her support and totally not because the writers took away her ability to feel love for any character other than Adrien! 🙃 (Also Luka had the obligatory “You two are made for each other” line, because the show is going to forget how much he loved her and force him to move on with a character who was only in three other episodes 🤦)

Even if Zoeka doesn’t happen in 4 and 5, it probably will in 6 and 7 considering that it’s “post-series” or whatever and they wouldn’t know what else to do with him.

Anonymous asked:

Dnb: In Crocoduel, Luka figures out Marinette's secret identity but doesn't tell her (so the writers can justify he is a crappy bf). In Wishmaker, he finds out about Adrien's secret identity, has tge realization that they are into each other and goes "Marinette I live you but you and Adrien are meant to be so bye"

The lack of self-awareness in ignoring that Adrien also didn’t tell Marinette.

Anonymous asked:

Don't need to Burrow

We will find out that Wishmaker will show Adrien's wish which is to confess his identity/love to LB which results in Luka/Viperion finding out and keep using Second Chance/self sacrifice himself. If it was Marinette's case, Luka (whether or not he knows her secret identity) will find out her wish is to confess her identity/love to Adrien and he would use Second Chance/sacrifice to prevent that. He'll also find out that part of Mari's wish is she might not want to have a future with him and consider him as a second option. Realizing both of their identities as LB/CN and how dangerous their wishes are, Luka will do everything in his power to prevent that from happening.

Once the day is saved, Luka will pretty much tell Mari its best not to continue and stay friends. He'll either be sad that Mari don't like him that way anymore or scared of Mari finding out that he knows both of their identities.

Oh and the morality of the episode for Marinette is it's okay if you don't know what to do if life. It's best to not know and just live with it.

wow thanks i hate all of it

Anonymous asked:

Dnb: lukanette angst in crocoduel doesn’t make sense to happen now so it only shows up now to provide trouble for Marinette, akuma, or extra drama juleka for no reason

So the usual.

May I just point out that Juleka has now run away anxiously two episodes in a row now since “Guiltrip” is the episode before this in procode?

#((I keep forgetting how long it takes to reply to all of these lol but I adore them lol.))#category: salt #Didn't Need Burrow #other: ask and answer

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kaypeace21 · 3 years

Note

Was it just me or was the "I love her and I can't loose her again" scene super awkward? The camera switching to each characters gaping faces, it looked like Lucas was trying his best not to laugh, it almost felt comical? And how the intense not even romantic music just suddenly stopped. Maybe I'm misinterpreting it but it didn't feel like it deserves a "Awww how romantic" reaction. It just didn't feel all that romantic or even serious.

Yeah, I agreed. It came across as awkward af- like most aspects of mileven it was cringe and framed as such.

The dopey music cutting off abruptly - the look on eveyone’s faces .Even mike looked shocked he said it. Lucas making a joke right after the confession.

Not to mention everything else right before the confession.

-Max saying “ el has saved the world twice. And mike still doesn’t trust her .” And mike not denying it and saying “you want to talk about trust?really?!after... eleven spied on us”/ “guess girlfriends don’t lie they spy!”

-Hopper earlier in the season saying Mike is “corrupting her (el) ” . And Joyce says it’s not Hopper’s “decision” for mileven to breakup. And Mike says in the cabin, that El dumped him cause max is “corrupting her.” And Max says “this is exactly why el dumped your ass... the fact is she is not yours ! she’s her own person fully capable of making her own decision !” Neither respects El’s autonomy and decisions in her own romantic endeavors . Like max said previously in s3 : for El to find out what “feels like (her)” , she has to ignore what hopper and mike want.

-The fact mike also complains about El spying on him and asks what if he was on the toilet taking a “massive shit” and max saying “gross” in response. What romantic build up XD

-nancy saying “she (el) is her own person with her own free will.” And mike rolling his eyes and glaring at nancy .

-lucas rolling his eyes when mike is about to say he loves el & is ranting about everyone being careless with her powers and treating her “like a machine.”

That whole scene: the built up ( of mileven criticisms) + the subsequent confession took 2 minutes total. 90%of which was poking holes in Mileven . And illustrating Mike not respecting El’s autonomy & El not respecting Mike’s privacy.

Nothing substantial was built up in the “love her” scene that made it feel heartfelt or romantic . If anything everything that led up to the scene was built up to do the opposite. To show how flawed the relationship is.

Not to mention at the end of the season he told El the reason he said he “loved her” . “I don’t know it was really heat of the moment stuff. We (max and him) were arguing .i don’t really remember. What did I say exactly? “He said the love- her phrase . Cause he wanted to one-up max, and others , who were poking holes in his het relationship- most likely.

The framing , lighting, and music did a lot to show the “love her” isn’t serious - but the dialogue made that even more clear. It’s like the pool shed scene in s3 where he said el was “the most important thing.” And el ignores the comment (like the audience should) , and immediately cuts him off to say hopper was probably right and that they spend too much time together (based off a remark mike mentioned about Hopper right before the “best thing” moment). She literally completely ignored the “best thing” comment. The scene had offbeat music , el scowling, dropping a dummy in annoyance, fullframed shots of their bodies, no dramatic lighting, and Mike’s delivery being flat and taking about 2 seconds with no build up . As opposed to the shed scene of mike saying meeting Will was the “best thing”: shots of just their faces , unlike mileven body shots ( expresses this to be an important scene for the 2 characters personally. And emotionally significant to the audience since we’re focused on every expression they emote . The scene is all about their relationship. The audience is FORCED to see importance in the scene /relationship cause they’re the only 2 things in frame) , there’s dramatic lighting/contrasting shadows, no music just the sounds of Will and mike crying, a single tear down mike’s face as he does a 2-3 minute monologue about why Will being in his life is important . And when mike finally says it was the “best thing” we have a long shot lingering on Will’s face and his reaction to Mike’s words - right before he breaks free of the mf. Before Will’s face reveal they even focus on just shots of mike as he speaks for more than a minute and a half- so Will’s reaction is more of a sunker punch to the audience emotionally since we have that slow build up of expectation over time. El ignored the comment . Will was saved by it!

I mean - why give mileven : “soulmates”/ “the main couple” a romantic confession that was a joke ? Have mike and el breakup in a comedic fashion with cheery music on a sunny day? With neither heartbroken after ? And contrast it to the byler fight? And end with a mileven kiss where mike looks confused, doesn’t kiss back, had his eyes open, and has the same song in the background that robin rejected steve to? . Not to mention the script has mike after the kiss think “what the hell just happened?” Boy is confused with what just occurred. They dissed mileven so much in s3 and did so In more subtle ways in prior seasons. The Duffers can write romance ... and dysfunctional romance . It’s just a matter of time before the dysfunctional/non endgame pairings are revealed for what they are😂

#byler #byeler #anti mileven

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kitkatopinions · 3 years

Text

Okay, so I’ve talked before about the many problems I have with James Ironwood’s semblance ‘Mettle’ here, but I wanted to make a post about what changes I personally would make to James’s semblance and how I would put it into practice in the show.

This is pro James Ironwood content. Ironwood haters, don’t @ me, don’t interact.

1. Change the phraseology and the way the semblance is presented. I would present it as a literal form of mind control, where his semblance makes him do whatever it takes to accomplish a set goal. Phrasing it as increasing his stubbornness and focus to the point where other things fall by the wayside makes it seem like his semblance just makes character traits much stronger, villainizes those traits, and is insensitive to people that hyper-fixate and can’t help that. Phrasing his semblance instead as centered around making him do whatever it takes to accomplish a goal, even if that changes who he is, is better in my opinion.

2. Change his semblance from passive to active This is good for a couple of reasons. People can’t control their passive semblances, which A. leaves James looking almost completely sympathetic (since, you know, he can’t fully control his actions) and it also leaves the casual viewer wondering what’s James and what’s his semblance. Did he bring his ships to Vale of his own volition or was it his semblance? Did he close the borders to Atlas himself or is it his semblance? Did he shoot Oscar himself, or was it his semblance? Etc. Etc. Making his semblance something that he himself chooses to use despite recognizing that it’s dangerous both gives James some level of culpability and it makes it much clearer to the audience what’s James’ personality and what is done under the influence of his semblance. I would make it so that James can turn on his semblance, but rarely ever does, because when he turns it on, he can’t make himself turn it off, and he can’t control himself or his responses in that state. I would make it so the only ways for James’s semblance to turn off again is if his goal is completed, his aura breaks, or he dies.

3. Make his semblance use clear through visual cues Honestly, this one isn’t as needed as the other two, but it just makes it much easier to understand and A. gives the audience another way to be clued in to when James is or isn’t under the affects of his semblance, and B. gives the characters a way to be clued in to when James is or isn’t under the affects of his semblance. In the first Avengers, when someone got possessed, their eyes would turn black and then turn a certain color of blue. A similar thing could happen with James, his eyes lightening, even if it was really subtle.

Also a change in body language would make for a subtle, but nice shift. James tends to put his arms behind his back, he tends to look people in the eye when he’s talking to them, he sighs, he acts tired out, he acts a little awkward, he gives little physical signs of affection like a shoulder to the hand, or a hug, or smiling softly. Having him do none of these things - keeping his arms at his sides, not looking at people when he talks to them or they talk to him, acting perfectly alert, not ever showing his more affectionate, warm, or awkward sides - all would make it clear that there’s something off. James isn’t acting like himself. To be totally fair to the show, there’s for sure some of that ‘James isn’t acting like himself’ stuff in the show, buuuut to be totally honest about the show, it’s clear we’re meant to see James as just an evil villain and his semblance isn’t even mentioned in the show, so... Yeah.

So in my ideal version, James’s semblance is an active semblance he can’t turn off, that forces him to accomplish a set goal no matter what and will even change his morality and base personality in order to achieve it, and it has visual cues like a change in body language and eye color shifting. Another thing to note is that James’s semblance is a secret, even to many of his confidants. The people that James has told about his semblance are Qrow and Ozpin.

Now to apply it to the show.

Adding an extra scene into the early episodes of V7.

Qrow enters James’s office and the two start talking about James’ plans. Qrow notes that it all still seems like ‘a bit much’ and James dismisses this concern, talking about how drastic times call for drastic measures, and they have to do whatever they can to stop Salem. Qrow has a moment’s pause and a guilty look (since he’s keeping the secret of Salem being immortal,) but then narrows his eyes and asks James “Is that you or your semblance talking?” James sighs, he says “You know I don’t use my semblance.” Qrow looks unconvinced, and James turns to face him a little more fully. They lock eyes and Qrow seems satisfied, nodding a little and turning away again. James asks Qrow to trust him, and Qrow agrees, with the qualification that James has to let him - and the others - help him instead of taking it all on himself, which James also agrees to, if not a little reluctantly.

Later in the episode ‘Gravity’ when Ironwood makes the choice to leave Mantle, he does so clearly under his own power. As Team RWBY start opposing him and after realizing they’ve gone behind his back, we see James hesitate. He takes a deep breath with his back to the girls and the Ace Ops and then triggers his semblance, his aura lighting up for a minor moment and his eyes shifting color to a lighter blue. The Ace Ops and Team RWBY all have a split second moment of confusion - seeing his aura flash - but then James turns and that’s when he declares he’s going to enact martial law. The scene continues on as is, with Ruby contacting the others and the Ace Ops going to arrest Team RWBY, etc.

Meanwhile, Qrow, Robyn, and Clover are all left confused and uncertain, and then receive the order for everyone’s arrest, including Qrow. Cue more confusion, and Qrow says there must be some sort of mistake. Robyn starts up the fight, Clover and Qrow try to de-escalate things, and in this version of things, Qrow doesn’t really join in the fight (Oh, I should note, I’m also erasing the Oz-punch in this version because I can do whatever I want.) When the plane goes down, he’s still trying to defend and make sense of things, but Tyrian’s coming on strong, taking advantage of Clover trying to make sure Qrow can’t get away - since he literally doesn’t know that Qrow isn’t a criminal - and Qrow being unwilling to fight Clover, and Tyrian kills Clover himself. Qrow’s distraught and affected, but doesn’t blame James, and Tyrian gets away.

He and Robyn are both arrested, and meanwhile, James and Oscar’s confrontation happens, and right before Ironwood shoots him, Oscar realizes that his eyes are different, but is then shot. In season eight and in jail with Robyn, Jacques, and Watts, we see Qrow frustrated and upset as the three argue back and forth, and all three of them are blaming Ironwood, when Qrow gets up and again starts trying to say there’s been some kind of mistake. Robyn says he’s putting too much faith in Atlas’s higher ups, and Qrow says that she just doesn’t know James like he does - which is true. When the guards come to take Watts away, Qrow says “That isn’t like him,” And Robyn rolls her eyes, but we see Qrow’s eyes widen in realization and he tells Robyn that James must’ve triggered his semblance.

Meanwhile, Oz (now back and getting the lowdown on everything from Oscar) speculates on whether or not James’s semblance is affecting his choices, but the both of them agree that they’re not 100% sure if they can give James the benefit of that doubt after Lionheart and everyone else that’s ever betrayed Oz (Note this also leaves a place where at least Oscar can say he’s sorry for how the Jinn/backstory thing went down.) Oscar doesn’t ask how James’s semblance works and Oz only really mentions that it alters his behavior. Oscar doesn’t tell the others Oz is back and Oscar doesn’t mention the semblance to the others, since neither of them are sure if it’s really at play.

Next time we see them, Robyn is pressing Qrow for details on James’s semblance and he tells her what it does and how it works. Robyn isn’t sure, but Qrow insists. He does wonder why James even turned it on and takes a moment to be angry that he did when he knows how dangerous it is - and maybe makes some comment about ‘if I could keep mine off, I’d never use it.’ Robyn hesitates, and then says “Well, I trust you, Qrow. If you say it’s his semblance, and that’s what’s really putting Mantle at risk... Then how do we stop it?” The two start making a plan to break out of the jail to get to Ironwood so they can help him.

Meanwhile, everything with Ironwood keeps escalating, the Ace Ops are still following his orders, they try to arrest Penny, delivering the bomb to the whale, find Team JRY, Winter makes her compromise, Cinder breaks in to free Watts, yada yada. When the Ace Ops bring the bomb back to Ironwood and it’s revealed Qrow and Robyn have escaped, James starts talking about how he should’ve used Qrow to get to Penny, could’ve used Penny’s friends against her, and then decides to drop the bomb on Mantle. And Winter clearly figures out something is wrong and starts getting suspicious and freaked. She tries to talk him out of it and tells him “this isn’t you, why are you doing this?” but James will barely look at her and keeps insisting, and finally she ‘agrees,’ but clearly seems perturbed and very unhappy with it.

Meanwhile, seeing the bomb threat puts Oz over the edge of thinking this is James affected by his semblance. Both he and Oscar still aren’t totally sure, but bring it up to Ruby and the others, and there’s a moment of “What the heck, another secret” before Oscar defends Oz “We didn’t know for sure, there was so much going on, I’m the one who didn’t think to mention it, it wasn’t our secret to tell,” and Jaune or something quickly says they don’t have time to argue anyway, and everyone moves on. No one is sure that it’s just James’s semblance, but Ruby declares that they have to try and break his aura and trust that there’s a fix - keeping the themes consistent, what with Emerald easily accepted right there. However, there’s still Salem reforming and the virus infecting Penny to think of, so they start making their whole plan as it is in the real show.

When Winter helps Marrow escape, she tells him that there’s something very wrong with James (even noticing about his eyes,) and he - like Robyn - thinks she’s just putting too much faith in him, and Winter sadly says that maybe he’s right, but that she just would never have believed he’d do something like that, insisting that his other choices made sense, that every war takes sacrifice, but this was just too far, cruel, evil, even. Marrow gets more serious and agrees. Qrow and Robyn, having escaped, start realizing everything that’s happening, they start to become even more frantic to find James and break his aura, which kicks into overdrive when they hear the message saying they only have an hour to go before James drops a bomb on Mantle. Qrow says “James is never going to forgive himself if that happens,” and Robyn declares “I’ll never forgive him if that happens.” Qrow gets angry and Robyn gets angry in response, reminding Qrow - and the audience - that James is the one who chose to turn his semblance on.

When the two run into Winter and Marrow, Winter starts telling them that James is planning to bomb Mantle, and Qrow gives her a quick low-down of James’s semblance. Winter then gets a quick “I knew it,” moment. Winter convinces Qrow she’ll break James’s aura or die trying and for him and Robyn to focus on getting the other Ace Ops out of commission since James will let her get close enough to land a strong enough hit. Qrow is really reluctant to leave it in her hands, but she assures him “I’m not going to let the General destroy himself,” and Qrow - despite his clear early problems with Winter, says “I know you won’t.” The fight goes down pretty much the same, with the kids still all going hard and Winter getting in the final hit that puts James out of commission. Nora, Jaune, and Oscar are all like “Did that do it, is he back to how he should be?” And Winter says she’ll bring him to a medical room. Nora and Jaune exchange an unsure look, Nora ventures “Just a medical room?” And Winter sighs, looks a little unsure herself, but then nods. Ozpin then speaks up, saying “She’s right. I... I trust him. I have to trust him.” Jaune, Nora, and Ren then agree, nodding, and then things start continuing like normal, only Winter is keeping Ironwood in a medical room instead of a jail cell.

When James wakes back up, he’s himself again. He has to deal with the fact that because of his choice to turn his semblance on, he almost caused destruction and death to innocent people at his own hand and when there was absolutely no real reason to. He has to grapple with the hurt he caused as well as knowing he literally had no control and couldn’t even feel horror or guilt over what he was doing in the moment. He could go on to Vacuo, but he knows the general population of Atlas and Mantle won’t just accept that it was his semblance at work. He’s going to be hated, maybe even arrested as a villain, his position and his ability to lead that he’s strived for in an effort to help whoever he can is gone, many of the people who were his allies will never look at him the same way again, he hurt Penny so much, and he can’t just get rid of that because he never meant to and hadn’t been able to control it - and it was still because he made the choice to turn on his semblance in the first place. But. No, in this version, he doesn’t die, and Qrow would talk to him and connect with him again somewhere down the line, and when James started berating himself, Qrow would softly and sympathetically say

“You idiot. I know you didn’t do this.”

This is by no means perfect. This is by no means without flaw. And I know my Ironqrow shipping impacted it, but you know what? I don’t care. I wrote this for me. This is the headcanoned version that’s going to live in my head rent free, canon or otherwise.

#rwby criticism #anti rwby #james ironwood #pro james ironwood #ironwood defense #pro ironwood #james ironwood defense #Again any Ironwood haters don't interact

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astralaffairs · 3 years

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concept: first lady mc reads of fotp!tjeff’s speeches and edits them for all the things she thinks are stupid or unethical. and he’s like “sweetheart, my party isn’t ready for universal healthcare. i can’t be pissing people off within the first month of my presidency.” but she couldn’t give a fuck and continues marking up his speeches with a red pen all while insisting he gets a new speech writer.

y'all need 2 STOP hitting me w concepts i like this much i have 0 self control and WILL write every damn one of them. there are like 4 sitting in my inbox rn smh.

(by which i mean pls keep sending me concepts like this i love writing fotp drabbles)

---

"What're you still doin' up?"

Y/N's eyebrows shot up as she looked up; a small, tired smile graced her lips as Thomas entered their bedroom, shaking his blazer off as the door fell shut behind him. "Hey. I'm glad you're back," she said softly. "I've just been tying up a few final loose ends with what I've been working on before I go to sleep."

"Can it wait until the morning?" he asked. He laid his blazer on the back of a chair at the side of the room before immediately starting to loosen his tie. "It's gettin' late. And I miss spendin' time with you. You work too much."

She scoffed, but her smile was only growing at his words. "Did you, the President of the United States, just tell me that I work too much?" He rolled his eyes as she spoke, just discarding his tie on the floor beside their bed. "That really is rich coming from you."

"Yeah, yeah, make fun all you want," he said, crossing the room to join her on their couch, "but you always overwork yourself, and you know it. You've been doin' it for as long as I've known you."

"Alright, I'll come to bed in a few minutes." He took a seat behind her, and when he rested his hand on her inner thigh, it sent shivers rippling across her skin. She looked up. "You go get some sleep. I'll finish this quickly. I promise."

"What're you workin' on, anyway?" She didn't protest when he withdrew the paper from her lap, glancing over it, and the corners of his lips quirked up. "Is this the address I'm givin' on Friday?"

"The very same."

"You shouldn't be losin' sleep over this," he said matter-of-factly, turning his head back toward her as he squeezed the top of her thigh lightly. "Either lose sleep spendin' time with your dear, sweet husband who's fucking sick of thinkin' about legislation, or just come to bed, hm?"

He passed her back the paper, instead looping an arm around her waist as he kicked his legs up onto their coffee table, and when he pulled her in to rest against his shoulder, she put up no protest.

"Just five more minutes. I promise." The barely-concealed yawn in her voice made Thomas look down at her skeptically.

"Alright, but I'm holdin' you to that. If you're still working in five minutes, I'll carry you to bed myself."

"No complaints here." She turned her head to kiss the corner of his mouth gently before she turned back to her paper, fidgeting with her red pen as she reached the last page of the document. Thomas's eyes had fallen shut; he was more than content to just sit there with her until she finished, as he had no desire whatsoever to think anymore about pushing his healthcare bill through Congress.

He opened his eyes when Y/N scoffed. Her pen ran down the page in a long slash, and she was pursing her lips as she jotted notes in the margins, but it made Thomas furrow his brow.

"Hey, now, what was so wrong with that paragraph?"

"Seriously?" She raised a skeptical eyebrow, glancing back at him. "You keep treating healthcare like it's some privilege that poor people should have to grovel at the feet of the rich to have access to. It can't be conditional like this."

"I'm not actin' like that," he defended. "I'm just sayin', hiking up taxes threefold isn't a sustainable way to fund this. It'd be an overreach from Congress. We've gotta use money efficiently."

"You fucking libertarian," she muttered. "The part of the bill about work requirements is gonna get killed in Congress. There's no way the House Democrats will vote to pass it unless you get rid of that."

"What's that got to do with my speech?"

"You're misrepresenting the legislation if you keep that paragraph," she said, proceeding to scribble out a sentence in the paragraph after. "And get rid of this. If you're trying to implement a public option, focusing on the private sector will get you nowhere. You're just gonna make people angry."

"I'm not 'misrepresenting' anything." He scowled. "Both those things are important for the bill."

"But this isn't a bill, Thomas; it's a speech," she huffed. "Anyway, the legislation needs to be universalized, or you can't 'mitigate poverty' how you claim to. Do you have any idea how many of the people who can't meet the work requirements on healthcare are going to end up in poverty because they can't afford the care they need?"

"I hear you," he started, "but this is the best way to make it more affordable without tankin' the economy."

"Have you even considered capital gains taxes?"

"That's gonna kill entrepreneurship."

"You're so full of it sometimes," Y/N scoffed. "'Entrepreneurs' won't be affected. It only affects, like, Jeff Bezos and Mark Zuckerberg, and they have so many assets that it literally doesn't matter."

"I'm not gonna sit here and argue with you about this. I'm not sayin' you're wrong, but I am sayin' this bill needs to be somethin' I can convince the Senate to pass," he said, and Y/N rolled her eyes.

"Then write a new bill that doesn't mean the people who are the worst off don't get coverage," she said, jotting that down on the side of the paper, "because this doesn't resolve the issue."

"I'll bring it up when I get the chance," he assured her, and she glanced back at him with a grateful smile. "Can I ask why this is so important to you?"

"Because I'm an empathetic person, and I care about people?" she replied, tone scathing, and he raised an eyebrow.

"Woah, there. That wasn't an attack, sweetheart," he said. "What's got you worked up?"

"I'm not 'worked up,'” she bit back, but when he gave her an apologetic look, gaze soft, her annoyance began to subside. “This is just a sore subject for me." Y/N finally lowered the paper in her lap, turning her head toward Thomas. "I know I've told you about how long my parents spent in the hospital before they passed."

"Yeah. Yeah, you have," he said softly. He turned, orienting himself in Y/N's direction so he could pull her into his lap, and while she sighed, she laid back against his chest.

"When they died, I was left with most of their healthcare debt," she continued. "I was living far below the poverty line for almost a decade because of it."

"I'm so sorry," he whispered, and she laced her fingers into his with his arms around her waist.

"It was a long time ago," she replied. "I just don't want anyone else to end up in anything like the situation I was in. Nobody deserves that."

"No, they don't. I'll see what I can get past Congress." He kissed the side of her neck, and she hummed contentedly, squeezing his hands. "But I've still gotta discuss my plan for healthcare on Friday, so stop demolishing my speech."

"You asked me to look over it," she said frankly, and though her eyes had fallen shut when she laid against him, she cracked one open to glance at him skeptically. "These are my edits. Change the bill."

"That's an awful weighty edit, sweetheart."

"Hey, I also improved your phrasing," she went on, holding his paper up where they could both see it. "I'm making your speech better, don't complain about it."

"You cut my section about deductibles?"

"No one wants to talk about deductibles, babe." She tapped the paper with the back of her pen. "They want to know whether they'll be insured or not. They won't listen to the nuances of your bill in your public address. You're going to need a press release for that."

"And the part about family values?"

"It was useless." She shrugged. "I know you're just pandering to your party and all, but it sounded stupid in the context of the speech."

"Harsh," Thomas said, and the offense in his voice was mostly dramatized. Y/N pursed her lips. "But I can't be breachin' party lines in this speech. I'm not gonna get anything done if I turn the Senate Republicans against me."

"Listen, I'm not a political strategist, so that's your prerogative," she said matter-of-factly. "But if you don't like my feedback on your speeches, then hire a damn speechwriter, Thomas."

He hummed reluctantly. "But havin' you review my speeches gives me an excuse to spend more time with you. I don't have a whole lotta interest in having even longer meetings with White House staffers."

"Then take my edits to heart." She pursed her lips. "You know very well that I'm the only reason you have bipartisan support. If I didn't pick fights with you once a week about green energy, all the Democrats would still oppose all your stances on it."

"I'll look back over the speech in the mornin', then," he decided, and she shifted on the couch to face him, legs still draped over his lap. "I trust you."

"Good," she replied, and she looped her arms around his neck as she pulled herself up to kiss him. "But stop exploiting my degree in journalism."

"I'm not exploitin' it."

"Then what do you consider asking your wife to edit your speeches pro-bono to be?"

"A nice li'l side effect of managin' to convince someone so smart to marry me." She laughed as he pulled her back in to kiss him, but she gasped when he bit her lip teasingly, and his mouth drifted down her neck. "I love you," he murmured against her skin.

"I love you, too."

With that, Thomas hooked his arm up under her legs, and his smile widened against her neck when she yelped as he picked her up. "Now, I seem to remember sayin' something about carryin' you to bed if you were workin' for more than five minutes, so you don't get to negotiate anymore."

She squirmed in his grasp, but any of her efforts to get out of his arms weren't in earnest. She huffed. "So much for respecting personal liberty. Just wait until your voting bloc finds out all that rhetoric was just a lie."

"Oh, hush, let's not pretend you mind," he said as he tossed her down onto their bed, and she bounced when her back hit the mattress. He didn't hesitate to climb on after her. Though she tried to pull herself up to rest on the throw pillows, Thomas was on his hands and knees above her; she didn't have much of a range of movement when he dipped down to kiss her. "If you did, you wouldn't have married me."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever, Jefferson," she grumbled, despite wrapping her arms around his neck. "Talk all you want, but I dunno how smug you're gonna be when I up and leave you one of these days."

He grinned. "You know I don't buy that for a second." She rolled her eyes, but the corners of her lips twitched upward when he kissed her forehead. "You love me too much."

Despite everything, Y/N could feel herself flush. "Just go put on some pajamas so we can go to sleep."

"Alright, if you insist," he huffed, rolling off of her. "Be right back."

"You'd better hurry, or I might run off with Dolley and elope," she called after him, and Thomas laughed.

"'S cute, but we both know you aren't goin' anywhere."

"And why not?"

He raised a confident brow. "I'll tie you down if that's what it takes to keep you here, sweetheart."

"Wouldn't be the first time," she mumbled, turning to discard the throw pillows from the bed onto the floor.

When she looked back at him, his grin was still wide, smug, but the look in his eyes was soft. She pursed her lips as her own smile broadened. "Now go change. I'm not going to sleep without you."

"Fine. You need some rest.”

“Yeah. So do you.”

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