#how far I've come | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

six-of-snakes · 7 months

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somtimes a boy's just gotta recognize the girl he used to be and acknowledge what she did for him and then move on to keep living his life knowing she's watching proud of what he's done

#i really feel like i am a boy who used to be a girl #and I don't really acknowledge that because it can be really triggering for my dysphoria #but that girl learned about being queer #she has childish crushes on girls and callrd herself a lesbian and learned about the existence of trans people #she did most of the work to get me where i am #and sometimes i feel like she was someone else entirely #and it's a little weird to feel like the boy i am now was never an innocent kid #but that was the girl. she let me become who i am and stepped aside #but i think she'd be proud of what I've done #how far I've come #so i just wanted to appreciate her for a minute #good job younger me. you got me here. i appreciate all the work you did <3 #transmasc #ftm #personal #oliver talks about himself again #transgender #please be kind I'm just thinking about my own personal experiences with gender #feel free to reblog though #queer #lgbtqia

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1introvertedsage · 1 year

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theninjamouse · 2 years

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Feeling nostalgic today

#their very first moment #how far theyve come #how far I'VE come #OoF extras #shorby #grillby/reader

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frogwaltzes · 6 months

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I went to inpatient for the first time when I was 19. The details were fuzzy, my vision blurry and clipped as my dad drove me to the hospital. I was asked to pee in a cup. I remember sitting in the stall in the bathroom and forgetting why I was there.

"Are you ok?" A nice nurse knocked on the door. I blinked but it still didn't feel like reality.

They had to take me to the next hospital in an ambulance. I remember being sick to my stomach. Hot flashes lulled over me like waves, as I was strapped to a gurney, pulled away from my parents, and into the strange silence of the back of the ambulance.

I thought maybe I'd experience something of the life changing degree. Someone would create an experience so insightful, so healing for me, that I would never have to go back to inpatient for the rest of my life. None of those things turned out to be true.

I sat in my bed and read all day and spoke to no one. The nurses were quiet, the blood work made me cry, the sleep was full of tossing and turning and tears. There was no way to make peace with sleeping somewhere so far from home. I couldn't even picture where I was on a map of my state - I didn't even know the name of the town.

I was in that hospital for 9 days, and then they let me leave. During that time I finally started taking medication that I am still on today. I no longer suffer through hallucinations, but my paranoia can be intense, my intrusive thoughts debilitating, turning my mind in circles as I am convinced that I am not the person I thought I was.

There was no choice but to go. One month later, I had to go back, because I couldn't let go of my self harming habits. And two years later I went again. As I sit here writing this, my medication in a pink plastic box on my bedside table, all I ever do is hope I won't go back.

But what I think about the most is what it would take to have to go back. What it would take for things to truly get that bad again. The things that would have to change. What would have to be gone. I see it in my mind every day - I live out the scenarios, I cry on the car ride home watching a thinly veiled movie stretch over my windshield as I drive. Watching it all go wrong. Giving me reasons to give up again.

And it's not that I want to. It's that, I fear the inevitability of these events. Knowing some things simply must happen, the gnawing thought that it could be any day now. Any hour. Any minute I could get a call - the world is going to turn upside down, and I along with it. I have more control than I used to. But I'm scared it won't matter. I'm scared I'm going to want to let go.

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welcometogrouchland · 1 month

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[ID in ALT] I've made posts before about Talia/Dick co-parenting Damian moments (will never happen but let me dream) and this came to me in a vision. Took me ages to finish for some reason 😭 and then even longer to post

#dc comics #dc #damian wayne #dick grayson #talia al ghul #batfamily #dc robin #nightwing #anyway. yes im a self-indulgent ''dick as damians secret third parent'' truther #like i DO think it's way more complex and nuanced than the schmoopy affectionate fan portrayal of it #they're brothers they're father and son they're partners they're the dynamic duo except only in past tense etc etc #but consider! I'm not immune to schmoopy affection in fanworks. it compells me despite itself #anyway it's technically not that crazy when it comes to dick and damian. they hug! often! at least they did #it's not as big a leap to these types of scenarios #also talia ''somewhat absent for complex reasons on both her and damians part but very loving and loved by her son'' al ghul #you will always be famous to me #son of the demon origin...bwahhh #anyway. someone made a comic kind of like this/like a post i made abt this topic #but way funnier bc dick and talia starting trying to beat each other up #so go look at that as well #anyway. it's been a somewhat difficult few weeks so I'm. desperately trying to take it easy #i got some reading with me (first vol of kevin smiths GA run that i found second hand and jaimes BB run vol 2!)#so we'll see how far i get through those. considering there's demons in my head telling me to re-read things (LET ME OUT!!!)#when i finish GA and BB i do plan on rereading robin 2021. as a treat to myself #it's a run I've really warmed up to as time went on #I'm keeping up w/ the current b&r run even though it is. admittedly very slow w/ some weird dialogue #i read it for the damian content more than anything. also nikas back so that's neat :]#idk I have a feeling that after absolute power shakes out we might get some more creative team switch ups #so if anyone at dc is interested in taking over the reigns on b&r...that could be very neat #(it's me they should hire me. please DC i have ideas listen to my red hood pitch PLEASE-)

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dailyrandomwriter · 1 year

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Day 232

I was reminded yesterday, or rather I had to remind my father yesterday that I was a hot mess over a decade ago, in my twenties.

Technically, I’m still a bit of a mess. I’ve written before about the joys of trying to be an adult to yourself and be a functioning adult. Which doesn’t always work. I still have piss poor sleeping habits, and have to bribe myself with stickers to clean my place. I’m always spending time trying to build better habits like I’m a computer program that someone is desperately trying to code to work properly.

But, believe it or not, I was worse over a decade ago.

I had just started to fully live by myself without a roommate and only had a part time job, which at the time only gave me 3 hours a day, 5 days a week. It had taken me 3 years at least to get to that point. To top it all off, I hadn’t yet learned how to plan out meals so I would eat well, or make sure laundry was done in a timely manner.

Frankly, I was lucky if I remembered to wash my sheets once every three months.

This was from a time in my life where I couldn’t imagine the kind of multi-tasking I do now for work. In fact, I never imagined myself working a job where I would be talking to random people on a daily basis and keeping someone else’s schedule in order.

So it was really no surprise that when my dad asked me if I had this document from 11 years ago that I told him I did not. He was mildly annoyed by this, and somewhat surprised. But really what did he expect?

I barely knew how to reach out to email someone about something I needed 11 years ago. Did he really think I would have my shit together enough to remember where I may have put an 11 year old document?

#if you thought I was bad now #how far i've come #baby steps

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canisalbus · 8 months

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✦ I was never as good as I always thought I was ✦

#but I knew how to dress it up #I was never satisfied #it never let me go #just dragged me by my hair and back on with the show #own art #own characters #CanisAlbus #Machete #Vasco #anthro #sighthound #dogs #canine #animals #I've been trying to come up with an outfit for Vasco that would go with Machete's void attire #something super simplistic and removed from canon fashion #no luck so far

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rottmnt-residuum · 7 months

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Part 4 of Arc II (Part 30)

we've hit the stuff that actually came from the dream baybee!!! it only took what? eight months?

⇇ | ⇽ | index | ⇾

#rottmnt #rottmnt leonardo #residuum #rottmnt residuum comic #c #g #tw guns #my brain struggles with having the characters talk during actions scenes ahaa #anyway- been wanting to have this sunrise roof scene finally come up for fucking ever #seriously why brain #did you know? this was origanally supposed to be one of the first scenes of the comic!#oh how far i've fallen #curse my need to give y'all proper set up!!! (╬▔皿▔)╯

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mikesbasementbeets · 17 days

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Sometimes I think it's just scary to open up like that. To say how you really feel. Especially to people you care about the most. Because what if... what if they don't like the truth? // Sometimes people don’t really say what they’re really thinking. But, you capture the right moment… it says more. // I didn't say it. // You didn't have to.

[remake of my very first gifset one year later]

#byler #mike wheeler #will byers #stranger things #mikesbasementgifs #hiii i rly love making gifs i'm so glad i started it's been so much fun playing and learning and i'm genuinely so surprised and also #proud of myself for how far i've come in a year. theres so much more i want to learn and seeing how much i have visibly improved is #great motivation to keep pushing myself and trying new things... like this actually i've never done a set like this before dhjsfdsdjhs #also if you’ve ever said nice things about my gifs please know that i love you it means the world to me <3333333 #anyway look at these gay boys they want to kiss each other on the mouths!!! (and they will!!!!!)#ok byeeeeeeeeeeeee

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zarla-s · 13 days

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Think you’ll ever draw/write Luisely again? :0

it's been 3000 years........

[patreon]

#asks and answers #tyytanb0n3d #luigi #prince peasley #luisley #or pxl as we used to call it back in the day #z art #man it's so much easier for me to draw luigi now #if i ever need a reminder of how far i've come then this is it lol #mario & luigi superstar saga #superstar saga

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hellaliterate · 6 months

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oh, to be a (joey richter) protagonist ...

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notholaenas · 21 days

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🤪

#jaytim #wip #whenever i'm struggling through a piece i find posting a wip v helpful. it shows how far i've come. maybe i'll finish this. maybe i won't.#the intentions are there for sure!

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emmasbadbatch · 7 months

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The rain doesn't seem so bad nowadays...

#emmasbadbatch art #star wars #the bad batch #tbb crosshair #tbb omega #reuploading an older piece to here because I still think it's cute #You can see how far I've come even in the few months between this one and my piece with Hunter and Omega

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dolphinbeartracks · 3 months

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me, circa 2019, listening to tma ep 1: genuinely unsettled/slightly freaked out while listening and for a brief period after

me, 2024, listening to tmagp ep 1&2: completely unphased by the statements, smiling and laughing to myself

#lol #how far i've come huh #tmagp #tmagp spoilers #the magnus protocol

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silvers-starrway · 1 month

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So the wildest thing happened where @mactheactor decided to dub over (if that's even the correct terminology) the Chaos Sonic animation I made!!!!

I'm still in utter awe about this like, hands down the coolest thing ever I've been thinking about this non-stop. Hope y'all enjoy it as much as I do!!

#starrway art #sonic prime #chaos sonic #okay now that the nice text for the post is done AHHHHHHHH!!!! AAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!#I've been screaming about this for the last 24 hours and the shock of it has worn down just enough for me to post this #NEVER WOULD HAVE GUESSED THIS WOULD HAPPEN IN A MILLION YEARS????#Sonic Prime is what got me on this long hyperfixation in the first place and I've met so many cool people in the fandom #and generally having a blast making art and it's been such a great time #so to then have Deven Mack come in and think that my stuff is awesome is such an insanely cool thing #it means a whole lot is what I'm trying to say haha #I do have to like microdose on this video because it makes me so incredibly happy that I get very overwhelmed by it #In a very good way though it makes me want to run laps outside #thanks to everyone I've met/interacted with so far being some of kindest people y'all are awesome #idk if this post is even like coherent I've been writing it in my mind for the past day because I have no idea how to even go about this #ok good night hehehe

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conjuring-ghouls · 9 months

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TOBIAS FORGE - Hård Rock På Export, 2022

#the band ghost #ghost band #ghost bc #tobias forge #tender father #unholy father #copia #papa emeritus iv #my gifs #i was rewatching this interview on my birthday and thought i had to gif it #i can't believe i've never giffed tobias before?#i am honestly so proud of him #and to see how far he has come #he's such an inspiration for me as an artist #also he had the sweetest smile in the last gif that i had to crop because it would exceed the 10mb limit 🥺

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